#((just be sure to read up my about info real quick so you can learn all about him. no hard feelings if you change your mind about following

[aspiringroleplays]

so sora when you was traveling with your friends did you guys ever roasted marshmallows when you camp out in the forest?

Unprompted || ALWAYS accepting!

"Maaaaaan, I would love to go camping at least once!" He gushed, lighting up at the mere mention. "It always looks like so much fun! Sleepin' under the stars, telling scary stories, roasting marshmallows! Everyone says they're delicious!"

He'd seen so many Disney movies and shows showing camping related stuff, he felt like he knew all about it. Sadly the only ones who would know anything about it were his American grandfathers. And unfortunately, he was no contact with both of them at the moment.

"Maybe Kairi an' I will get the chance this summer!" He faltered with a frown, and put his hand to his chin in thought. "Although I can't really see Ansem going for it..."

[rememberwren]

Okay, broke out the laptop to scream in your ear about some things I thought were really special about Skin Deep.

First of all, Simon's characterization. GODDAMN. Like you really know how to write him, how he goes more quiet and brisk the more nervous he is. So, so sexy, the way that Reader doesn't pick up on his vague cues that he likes her, but we alllll know what's happening. Nervous Ghost and don't-care Ghost are so similar, but you managed to convey the tiny details that made it thrilling to read.

The way you wrote him raising and lowering his mask was hot af. I could picture it every time, his little hidey place to help him feel less exposed to the hot girl looking at him with those eyes.

The descriptions of him being efficient and good at what he does -- SWOON. Big man with confident fingers make brain go BRRRRR

The subtle green flags throughout were just lovely. Watching her safely to her car. The way he abandons his usual silence to give her a bunch of info when she's nervous over text. The breaks, the modesty towels. Funny how it's so much more tempting to uncover yourself for someone who helps you stay covered. You just get it, Wren. You just get the nuance of attraction, and it shows.

When he insisted on that break, I KNEW. I LOVE guys jerking off in fics, you know why? Cause that shows they're not coercive. They fully understand that their sexual desire is their own job to manage, and it's just a thing they take care of because we're all adults here. HOT HOT HOT.

The attention to hygiene/contraception was super hot going hand-in-hand with grungy, cigarette loving Simon.

LOVED the part where Reader was trying to entice him to touch, and he wasn't understanding what she meant. That was so cute and funny.

Nipple play, ofc. Surprisingly rare in fics without lactation kink. Extra special to me.

He takes one of your thighs and wedges it between his own, until you’re no longer grinding against his cock but instead his denim-clad thigh. “You the kind of girl who can cum like this? Just from this?” 

This made me stop and paste it in a note for my review, because WOW. I've never read anything like that before. *I'm* not someone who can enjoy that particular position, so every time it comes up in a fic it takes me out of immersion and my thumb is braced to scroll to something farther down that I can relate to. But for some reason, him just being aware of different styles of anatomy and knowing to ask that, allowed me to stay in it.

Three fingers!!! Again, so RARE but (imo) so considerate when writing massive dudes. *I* don't write three fingers very often, because I feel like there's this stigma about it, that no one else shares my feelings that it's actually a helpful option ahead of sex with like a 6'4" dude. So seeing you write it was like... wow. I'm being a lil bitch about this, I should just write what I fucking want, look at Wren, she's doing it.

“Alright,” he laughs, pulling his fingers free and wiping the wetness on his cock. “No need to beg.” 

No need to beg?!? TEARS OF JOY -- this is just so much hotter than the ick I get when they do make Reader (me) beg. Just the zero-pressure interactions here were gorgeous.

The realism of him pushing past the limitations Reader thought she had of her own body was extra special.

The position keeps the penetration blissfully shallow (otherwise he might give your cervix a painful beating)

*pounding my fists on the table* YES YES YES when you're with big dudes, you learn real quick which positions are the best (shallow!!)

His zero-pressure approach to her pleasure, specifically when she says she can't finish a second time and he's just like, “If you can’t, then don’t,” GGHGHDSIODFDOS HOTTTTTT "if it happens it happens, but I'm just going to keep touching you like this for as long as I feel like, okay?" PINNACLE SMUT for me. Elite of the elite.

“Not sure I want you to cum now,” he says. “Hold it. I’m thinking it over.” 

I had to go back and read this like four times because I didn't grasp at first that he was joking. I was just like, "Oh, okay, already doing orgasm control, hmm okay." And then was so confused right after hahahahaha

Aww the asking her out right after fucking is so good and sweet, and a wonderful way to cement his character in everyone's minds.

Just WOW. I'll be coming back for rereads of this.

This ask was such a treasure, YOU are such a treasure. You need to be put inside a safe, a lockbox, behind a tripwire or SOMETHING. I could not find you more endearing right now. Thank you for seeing nuance in this when I felt like there wasn't any. You're an incredible writer and it shows even in the way you read.

[hisunshiine]

—late night talking | kth

→ posted: nov 22, 2022 → pairing: kim taehyung x reader → genre/au: strangers2???, camboy!au, fluff, smut → chapter rating: +18 / M for Mature → wc: 4,059 → warnings: taehyung is still hot, sexual talks via social media platform messaging, exhibitionism via internet, mutual masturbation, fingering, use of sex toys for masturbation, syncing sex toys for long-distance sex, use of pet names, praise, multiple orgasms, overstimulation, begging, sex crying, minimal daddy/babygirl vibes, feelings. → credits: thank you to @peachiilovesot7​ and @downbad4yoongi​ for your feedback on this chapter! i know i ended up changing things so it may come as a surprise if you read this after it’s posted, but thanks to @heathfritillary​, she was able to give me the info i needed to do what i originally planned! → taglist: @bts-ruu​ → summary: ‘we’ve been doing all this late-night talking about anything you want until the morning, now you’re in my life, i can’t get you off my mind.’ KTH is your favorite camboy, & you’ve just been chosen as the winner of his contest. The winner gets to have their fantasy play out, with a twist and a gift...the platform is testing a new ability to allow the content creators to also see their subscribers in real time.  → an: excited about camboy tae and can’t stop writing apparently. once again it includes the text under the images for those who need accessibility options! enjoy!! i recommend reading part 1 first!

part 1 | series masterlist

The last few hours at work have been hard for you to focus. Your mind is full of your upcoming session with KTH, your favorite camboy. After the initial shock has worn off from one, him privately messaging you, and two, announcing you as the winner of the contest, you begin to lightly panic about what it would be like. 

‘So not only will you be able to see me, but I’ll be able to see you, too.’

Those words circle your brain religiously, almost becoming a mantra. You make sure that the date aligns with your wax appointment, and you even splurge a little to get a mani-pedi so that you can feel as confident as possible when the time comes for you to appear on each other’s screen. 

Checking your phone, you see he’s sent you another message. Your heart can’t help but flutter; quick palpitations at the way his username lights up your screen with ‘One New Message’. 

Ever since he sent that initial private message to you, saying that you had won the event, he’s sent you additional flirty texts and even pictures of him that you feel should be a paid benefit with how risqué they have been. But you have sent other pictures back to him, answering his questions about how ready you are for today, and you think his words have only served to rile you up, which is probably his goal. 

He’s kept constant communications all throughout the day, and it’s hard to separate the delusional part of you that feels like this is oddly like you are in the talking phase with someone. But you remind yourself each time you slip: you pay KTH monthly as a subscriber. This is just the first time you’ve felt like you’re getting much more than your money’s worth for it. 

Opening his message, you squeeze your thighs together as you abandon your last email for his flirty communications.

[start of image words]

KTH: I’m excited for tonight, are you? You’ve been such a tease this week, I didn’t know you would make me wait this long.

[end of image words]

You chuckle at his words. He thinks you’re the tease?! He’s insane.

[start of image words]

KTH’s Baby Girl: I had work and wanted to make sure I could give you all of my attention. Plus, I think practicing patience is a good thing.

KTH: Oh, my baby girl, I’ve learned this week that I am anything but patient when it comes to you.

KTH: I bet you haven’t been patient either, bet you’ve touched yourself at least once this week.

KTH: I have.

[end of image words]

You feel the way your panties grow wet from reading his words. This man is too good at raising your blood pressure, making you all hot and bothered.

[start of image words]

KTH’s Baby Girl: If anyone is a tease, sir, it is you. I’m about to leave work now, and then I’ll be home, okay? You don’t have to wait much longer.

KTH: Hurry, baby. My cock is throbbing waiting for you. 

KTH: [image sent]

[end of image words]

Logging out of your desktop computer, you grab your purse and hurry out of the office, barely acknowledging your coworkers and boss as you take your leave for the weekend.

Sliding backwards away from his computer desk, Kim Taehyung sighs. He hasn’t been so enthralled with someone in a long time, not since his last relationship. He won’t lie, he’s always been a sucker for a partner who’ll yield to him in the bedroom, so it was no surprise to him that when he saw your entry to the contest that it was immediately his number one choice. But when you completed your profile and Taehyung was able to see what you look like? Hook, line, and sinker. 

And with the little biographical info that the platform allowed him to see about you, he learns  you are in the same time zone. What if…Taehyung shakes his head, not wanting to get his hopes up. He has to focus on the session that he’s about to do with you. 

Standing up, he puts his hardened cock back into his pants, adjusting himself after sending you that picture. He can’t help it. You just make him so horny, make him want to do so many things…he feels like he wants you all the time. As a content creator, he knows he shouldn’t provide you with the pictures for free, not to mention the flirty messages all week, but he’s enjoyed getting to know a little more about you, texting throughout the evening and into the wee hours of the morning about things unrelated to his line of work. 

Taehyung likes knowing about your day, and it helps him understand how a gorgeous woman like you ended up a subscriber of his and not spending your nights with a boyfriend instead. Busy with work, no time to get out and meet men your age who have similar interests and goals, the usual bullshit women your age are dealing with. Taehyung can’t help but want to make you happier. 

You had told him that he did, that his live streams are the stress relief at the end of a long week at work, that they make you feel better if you’re feeling down, but it’s starting to not feel like enough. It’s weird to Taehyung, because it’s only been a week, but there’s just something about you…

He walks around his apartment, gathering the candles and thumbing through his phone until he finds the playlist he prepared specifically for you. He has filled it with songs you sent him all week that fit the scene you wanted, and a few he added that he knew you’d like. Despite your dream being one where you please him, he knows it will be truly symbiotic because he’ll be happiest if you experience pleasure as well.

He has a bit of a caretaker kink, and he knows that it’s probably playing into why he’s so enraptured by you. And yet, the more he thinks about it, the more he doesn’t see how it can be a bad thing. If Taehyung is honest with himself, he thinks that you might be everything he’s looking for, and tonight’s session might just solidify that for him.

[start image words]

KTH’s Baby Girl: I’ve made it home safe! I bought the stuff you told me too, so I’ll get showered and set up.

KTH: That’s my good girl. 

[end image words]

Carefully toeing off your shoes from work, you can’t ignore the way your heart beat picks up as you begin to imagine what’s to come. After putting away your things, you grab the new candles you bought in the scent KTH told you to get, and place them atop the thick headboard you purchased from IKEA. Your trusty toy is fully charged and laid on your mattress, ready for use next to a secondary one you received in the mail from the camming platform this week.

Last week, KTH informed the powers-that-be that you were the winner, and so they reached out to you directly to mail you something from KTH himself to be of use for the session today. You’re excited to try it out, because you’ve heard of this brand before and because it’s something KTH chose specifically for the two of you to explore and enjoy together. 

Your shower is quick, and you watch the time to make sure you aren’t going to be late to the session. KTH already told you how he expects you to present yourself when you two finally join the server, and you wrap the towel around your chest, tucking the edge into the top to keep it secure. You release your hair from where it’s piled on top of your head, letting it rest in its natural state.

[start image words]

KTH’s Baby Girl: I’m just about ready, is there anything else you need for me to do?

KTH: No, baby, you’ve done so well. I’m proud of you. I’m sending you the invite for the session now, join once you’re ready. I’ll be waiting. 

 [end image words]

Smiling at his words on your phone, you adjust the small TV dinner tray that you’ve placed at the end of your bed for tonight. You take one last look around your room making sure it’s clean and light the candles at the head of your bed. Climbing onto your bed, you move your fingers on the mousepad and login once prompted. 

The invite link stares at you as you move your cursor to click it. You take a few deep breaths, trying to calm your heart before putting in your earbuds and pressing the touchpad.

The screen changes as it begins to load the camera, prompting you to allow use of your camera and microphone. You click allow, and the large box that you usually see KTH on appears, but now you can see yourself. It prompts you to connect when ready, and you can see that KTH is already in the session room.

You hate that you already did calming techniques before clicking the link, because it was a false alarm. Now is when you will really come face-to-face with KTH. As face-to-face as a screen allows. There’s nothing to worry about, you tell yourself, he’s been nothing but sweet all week and you’ve sent him pictures. If he wasn’t interested in this, he had all week to back out.

Moments after clicking you become the small screen in the corner and the large screen slowly loads until KTH appears, shirtless with his floofy hair falling across his forehead.

“Hi baby girl,” he greets you with his baritone. 

“Hi KTH,” your response is low, a little stuttered as you pronounce each letter as if his name is kay-tee-aych. 

“Hmm…I think we’re close enough that you can call me by my real name.” His following smirk causes your core to throb. “I think I’d rather hear you say that when you cum tonight.”

You nod, cheeks warm at the thought. 

“Baby girl, are you okay?” KTH chuckles at you; he loves watching the way you squirm so early in the interaction. You’re just as beautiful as the pictures you’ve sent him, and he can’t wait to see you squirm for real once you actually get started.

“Yeah,” you reply softly, “I’m just nervous.”

“Don’t be. You’re in good hands.”

“I know.”

He hums, a knowing look shared through the screen at the knowledge. This isn’t your first time entrusting your orgasm to him.

“Now, be a good girl and tell me your name.”

“It’s YN.”

He repeats your name, the sounds of each syllable rolling off his tongue languidly—you’ve never heard your name sound quite so sinful.

“Nice to meet you, YN. I’m Taehyung.”

It suits him, his name. 

“Taehyung.”

He likes the way you say his name a little too much, and can’t wait to hear you cry out for him.

“Now YN, go ahead and take that towel off for me, let me see you.”

You obey, slowly pulling the edge free and unwrapping yourself for him, like a present. He cues the playlist, sexy music flowing into your earbuds as you do a little dance for him as you unrobe.

“Mmmm, you’re gorgeous, baby.”

You preen at his praise, and he continues to guide you until your laptop is angled so you’re laying down with legs splayed open for him so he can see your glistening folds, but also so that you’re still able to see him. 

“Show me how you get yourself ready for me, fingers only. Just don’t put any in yet.”

Taehyung sits back and watches your pristinely manicured fingers rub circles on your clit, two fingers dipping down across your leaking entrance to gather your slick and spread it around until everywhere feels wet and your core throbs from being empty. He’s fascinated by you, by how wet you were before even starting, just because of him.

He palms at himself, his arousal having not fully eroded from when he sent you the picture earlier. 

“You look so pretty baby, did you get your nails done just for me?”

“Yeah—wanted to look good for you,” you pant out softly, voice breathy from how good it feels to toy with your clit and watch Taehyung. It’s a literal dream come true, something you didn’t know you wanted until you won this prize. 

“Good, baby, you follow directions so well. Now I want you to slowly enter that tight cunt of yours, show me how you swallow those tiny fingers so I can know how it will be once I finally get to feel you.”

Your reply to that loaded statement grows hazy as you fill yourself, whimpers escaping from the loss of contact to your clit as you slowly fuck yourself with your fingers while he watches. His eyes are focused on you, chest rising a bit faster as he takes in the way you begin to thrust inside of you.

“Fuck Taehyung, it feels good, but I know it’d feel better if it was your fingers.”

He grunts, now fully stroking his cock following the same speed he’s watching you take your fingers with. It takes only a moment for him to add some lube to the donut-shaped pussy sleeve he used last time, and the sound of each stroke has your eyes turning to the screen, watching his movements closely. It’s easy to pretend that it’s him filling you up, but part of you knows it would be fuller, feel better, if he was actually here with you.

“You said your toy has a dual function, right?” 

“Uh-huh,” you mewl, and he tells you to trade in your fingers for the toy, turning on both parts.

“It will make me cum so fast, though,” you complain, not wanting it to be over so soon.

“That’s okay, baby. I want you to cum four times tonight.”

You gasp as your fingers press the buttons and the inner vibration and suction to your clit begins, but you also gasp at his words. Four orgasms in one sitting?

“I don’t—shit, I’m not sure I can,” you pant, body convulsing slightly as the feeling builds. Taehyung begins to speed up his strokes, and your eyes never leave sight of his beautiful cock, lengthy and thick, the tip growing angrier as he neglects it for the shaft.

“If you’re a good girl, like I know you can be, you will.”

His voice is domineering, and you fall apart a few moments later, pleading for Taehyung as your climax takes over your senses. 

“Oh fuck, YN, you’re beautiful when you cum, you’re so good for me.”

Your fingers fight to turn off the toy, but his next command stops you.

“Don’t you dare, baby. Leave it, let the pain turn to pleasure and let me watch you fall apart again.”

You want to be a brat and rebel, but you also want to be good for him, because you want to be his good girl, his only girl.

“T-Taehyung…nngggghh, it’s too..too much…” you can’t help but to buck your hips as you writhe from the feeling. The suction overwhelms your swollen clit and that, alongside the vibrations, causes your body to shake from the sensation.

“C’mon kitten, you can take it. If I was there with you, you’d have no choice, and my cock is much bigger than that tiny thing.”

He was right and you knew it. 

“Baby girl, touch your breasts, lick your slick off of your fingers and tease those perky nipples for me.”

You do as he says, hands traveling up your stomach until they cup your breasts, palming them as you press them together before wetting your fingers on your warm tongue and circling your nipples. You can taste yourself, heightening your arousal. Taehyung groans, the sight of your body taking such immense pleasure while calling out for him making his night. 

“Taehyung…I’m gonna cum again, I can’t—”

“That’s okay baby, let me have it, I want this one too.”

You cry out his name and he shudders, slowing his strokes as your thighs quake in ecstasy, because how you sounded just then was almost enough to have him joining you, blowing his load two orgasms too early. 

“Please, sir,” you beg him, eyes brimming with unshed tears as you turn to look at the screen. He can see a tear fall, rolling down into the mattress as your hands grip the sheets at your waist.

“Kitten, what was your fantasy that won you today’s session?”

“I…” you can’t talk, whimpering from overstimulation as you attempt and fail to answer him.

“Remember, it was that you wanted me to show you what to do to please me, wanted to follow what I said and be my good girl, yeah?”

“Mmhm,” you agree with a hum.

“What would please me the most is to have this one too, baby, okay? I know you can do it, you’re perfect, princess. Another one, for me?”

“I’ll try, Tae…” the nickname slipping out as you’re unable to say much more, and he loves how it sounds coming from his baby girl, his bestest girl, all for him.

“Turn the settings up to two more levels baby, that’s the only way it’ll work.”

“No, I—fuck, can’t—”

“I would never steer you wrong baby, turn on your front after, bring that beautiful face toward the camera so I can see you.”

With a cry, you up the ante, putting both to level three and rising to your knees as you flip to your front. The movement helps alleviate some of the contact, and you’re grateful for it. You catch your breath while positioned on your knees, and Taehyung lets out a catcall at the angle he has of your ass. You arch a little more, removing more contact from your abused clit and swaying your hips for him, and he has to hold himself back from commanding you to tell him where you live for teasing him that way. 

The pooling slick leaking down your thighs from the position change has him licking his lips, fuck, he wants to taste you so badly, the way your lips are puffy from the vibrator, plush and glistening—you’re so sexy to him and he wants you more than you know.

Bringing your face closer to the screen, you have a better view of Taehyung as well and he adjusts himself. You can see how hard he is, the vein along his shaft appearing to throb. He’s added a cock ring to hold back his own climax, and you know that this must be hard for him too.

Laying flat on your tummy, the sensation grows and he can see it in your eyes as they roll back. 

“Taehyung!”

Your second to last orgasm of the night rips through you without warning, and Taehyung murmurs praises to guide you through it. You welcome the relief when he rewards you by letting you turn it off.

You lay there, panting, dripping, and spent. But you know Taehyung isn’t done with you yet. 

“Okay baby, last one, I think I prepped you well for this.”

And you know he did, because your second toy is bigger than the one you were using, with the added benefit that it pairs to his. When you position it for insertion, the thick shaft that resembles Taehyung’s (he’s pleased to notice) slides into you with barely any resistance thanks to your own slick and a little bit of lube. 

You move backwards on the bed to give Taehyung the full view of yourself in doggy style, your cheek flush to one of your pillows and your arm between your legs holding the dildo in place. 

Taehyung disappears for a few seconds as he removes the cock ring and leans to the side, reappearing with a white pussy sleeve that had been charging. Using the specific phone app for your sex toys, he double checks that it’s synced to yours.

You watch him pour lube onto his cock, his large hands spreading the glistening liquid over his swollen tip and shaft. 

“Okay, baby, are you ready? I’m gonna fuck into this, and you’re gonna feel it start moving to match.”

You nod, hand gripping the end of the inserted cock. 

“Ready, kitten? You’re doing so well, just one more, for me?”

“For you.”

His responding smile makes it worth it, and you can’t help but return it.

Your smile is wiped off your face as it contorts into a moan when you feel the motion of the dildo. Using your hand, you have it penetrate you deeply, the thickness stretching you out as it plunges in and pulls out with a loud suction. 

Taehyung thrusts up into his masturbator, eyes on the way you take the dildo, wishing he was the one behind you, taking you, your ass smacking his thighs as he fucks himself to the hilt, and he groans out your name, feeling so close already at the lewd sounds of the dildo fucking you. It’s so much better with this toy, because he can actually feel the way your walls grip him, the muscles clamping on the inserted toy sending his toy your contractions.

As he begins to pump the toy up and down faster, you feel the rotating head of the toy inside you speed up to match his movements. 

“Come on, kitten, show me how you would take me.”

You want to drop down flat and give up, but you’re so close—you can feel it building, and you start to rock your ass back, meeting the motions thrust for thrust as you moan for Taehyung.

“Fuck me, Tae, you feel so good, could fuck you all the time—”

“Yeah, you want me to fuck you everyday, make that pussy mine?”

“It’s yours, it’s all yours!”

“Damn right, fuck, I know it’s tight and dripping, can literally feel you clench—want to cum in you, want to fill you up so good.”

“Please, please, want that so bad, want you so bad. I’m gonna cum, Taehyung, I’m so close…”

“Give me your last orgasm, baby girl, you’ve been so good. I’m so proud of you princess, you’re doing so well, just one more, cum with me baby, let go.”

You’ve never come so hard or yelled so loud from an orgasm, and later you’ll wonder how your neighbors didn’t call the police. 

You lay there, body wracking with convulsions as the last of your high makes its way through your nervous system and Taehyung coos at you. He releases his own hot fluids into his masturbator, imagining it’s you he’s filling up, before he slumps backwards on his bed. The aftershocks of your walls still grip at him, and he’s regretful to leave the sleeve that feels like you, but he knows he needs to clean himself up, so he’s careful as he removes the toy, knowing his movements impact what you feel. 

With a gentle, yet firm voice, he instructs you to drink the water bottle you prepared next to your bed, and he hates that he’s not there to help you. He wants to draw you a warm bath or at least smooth your hair and hold you as you fall asleep. 

You did so well, he’s not sure if anyone has been able to follow his wants and take it like a champ the way you did tonight. Plus, if the synced sex toys are anything to go by, he wants to feel your walls contract on him like that without any barriers.

“Is it late there?” Taehyung asks you, a little worried about your wellbeing. In all the excitement, he forgot to ask you if you had eaten beforehand. 

“Not too late…the sun has just set I think. Still early enough if I want to order food from Yoojung Sikdang.”

“Yoojung Sikdang? I love that place! Wait—do we live in the same city?” Taehyung’s heart begins to pound as he watches the way your face takes on a questioning look. You share the name of your city with him and his eyes grow wide. 

Is it luck that the two of you are in the same place, or is it fate?

“YN…would you be interested in meeting up with me, in real life? I’d love to get to know you more, without a screen in the way.”

thank you for reading! feedback is greatly appreciated!! i loved what you had to say on the last one, so please let me know what you think, especially if you want more...

© hisunshiine 2022. All rights reserved.

[choicesficwriterscreations]

CFWC Writer of the Month - June 2023: peonyblossom

Each month CFWC highlights one of our talented fanfic writers, and this month’s writer of the month is @peonyblossom We hope you will enjoy learning more about them and their work below! The writer is selected at random. More info can be found on the navigation page.

Quick Links:

Tumblr Blog: peonyblossom Blog Masterlist AO3

How do you want to be known on Tumblr? Peony, Jay, or Ethan

1- When did you start playing Choices? What was the first book you played? 

I started playing Choices when it was first introduced after I saw the promos on HSS and HWU. Ofc the first book I played was High School Story!! 

2- When and why did you join Choices fandom?

I joined the Choices fandom because of Thomas Hunt LMAO. After playing the Thomas dates in HWU, I looked him up on Tumblr to see if there was any fan content, and there was (HUGE shoutout to @lovealexhunt and @gutsfics because their works were the first ones I saw). Through following a few Thomas Hunt fan accounts, I found some other stuff in the fandom, like CFWC, and decided to read some other really popular stories, and it just snowballed lol.

3- How did you pick your blog name? 

I wanted something that wasn’t fandom-specific so I could post content for any of the many fandoms I’m in. And peonies are my favorite flower! 

4- Pull up the first post in your archive, and tell us about it!  

The first first post in my archive is a reblog of a One Direction fanfic. My first original post was about the show Miraculous Ladybug. 

5- How long have you been writing fanfiction?

Ooh. A long time. Sixth or seventh grade, so nine or ten years? 

6- What is your favorite Choices book, and what is your favorite Choices book to write about?

My favorite Choices book is America’s Most Eligible, but my favorite book to write about is Red Carpet Diaries/Hollywood U. I think I just like reading and writing about stories in the film industry since that’s what I do, lol. 

7- Share the first fanfic you wrote with us. Do you still like it, or would you change it if you were writing it today?

Waiting Game / peonyblossom / AO3

I still like it! But, if I were writing it today, I would probably make it third person instead of first. It’s still cute, though!

8- What is your favorite fic that you’ve written?

Okay, probably a tie between What If It’s Now? and Love Lost.

9- Do you have a fic that you didn’t expect to be well received, but it was? What about one you expected to be but found could use a little more love?

I think there are a few I thought would’ve gotten a little more attention when I first posted them, but by now, I don’t really think that anymore. 

10- If you could write only angst, fluff, or smut for the rest of your writing life, which would it be and why? 

FLUFF. I mean, I pretty much only write fluff right now; I just love it so much! 

11- Do you ever recognize yourself in any of your MCs or in your writing?

Oh yeah. I think I see myself the most in my RCD/HWU MC, Jackie. In the HWU Universe, she’s a film student, like me, and in both universes, she’s an actor, like me! 

12- What element of writing do you struggle with most?

Finding the time to do it 🥲 Other than that, probably just get started. I tend to psych myself out, especially with bigger projects. 

13- Do you have any neglected work you really want to finish?

So. Many.

14- If someone you know in real life (who isn’t involved in fandoms) asked to read your work, would you let them? If yes, what would you recommend they read first? 

It depends on who it is, but I’d probably let them. As for what I’d recommend, it also depends on the person. Honestly, might just send them my AO3 and let them decide ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ 

15 - Are there any writers (published authors and/or fanfic writers) who influenced your writing? 

Probably more than I know! I’m sure there are plenty of authors who influence me subconsciously. But, I would say I tend to be influenced by classic novels like The Great Gatsby and The Picture of Dorian Gray.

16- Which one of your stories would you most like to see as a movie/series? 

Forever Sounds Perfect! I would love to just watch Ethan propose to Sydney 🥺

17- Do you write original fiction? 

Yeah! I mostly do screenwriting, but I also do fiction and poetry writing. 

18 -  What other hobbies do you have?

Hiking, reading, and yoga!

19 - What’s your favorite emoji? 

🥰 or 🫶

[naffeclipse]

Hoooooooooooooo boy! That chapter huh! So here we go!

(Oh god I'm looking at my notes and I'm already afraid of how long this is gonna be fgkdjhñjgf they're usually like half of this)

Ok, ok so! I was already hooked before even starting to read because of how last chapter ended! The way they were all mostly silent as they fled from the motel. That certainly was a situation for everyone involved. Aaah I was having so many feelings at seeing the boys shaken by what happened with the seal! And so was y/n since they were concerned and wanted to reassure them that they would protect them from being taken away.

(As a sidenote it's a bit funny but heartwarming too, because for so much of this fic the hunter has made an effort to calm them whenever they (mistakenly) thought the boys were scared and now that there is a situation where they are actually anxious about something, they can genuinely do just that. Say they will protect them.)

And ooo the boys are very confident that FEI wouldn't be able to control them, but it seems a bit reckless to be dismissing the hunter's concerns so quickly given the spook they just went through. I'm sure their experience as an ancient being has made them sure of certain things, but just like y/n's recently got upside down and all their convictions shaken, maybe they shouldn't be so quick to discard the possiblity that FEI has some more tricks in their sleeve. If there's a seal that can prevent them from touching it, what else could be out there right?

And ohoho, we got a bit more info on the salt's effect! Of course, I already know what happens at the end of the chapter, but I'll still put some of my thoughts as I read haha. And here I was wondering if by learning of Sun's inability to cross the salt, but Moon being able to, then a possible loophole for the vow could exist. Because technicaly they can cross the salt, just not all the time, and so they would be able to go there by technicality. Although that's a bit irrelevant now kjfhgfjds

But speaking about vows and trust, aaah the way they wake them up! Because they promised they would not leave them wondering again! Though ouch, when the hunter pleads with them not to go after the hunters. It must hurt a bit, having their vow being questioned like this, but they understand why that is. And y/n understands that it must hurt, because they apologize quickly. It makes sense though, since the constant lies from before must be a nagging thought even if it is unwanted.

I gotta say, I love the bit of wholesomeness you threw at us right before crap hit the fan XD Freddy’s description was so sweet. He certainly has that politeness about him and the fondness with which his chapter was written is plain to see. Henry really had a good time hanging out with Freddy! Also I love that this gives y/n ideas to study their own demon later on, like using the voicebox to hear their real voice. They want to know if there is something they have been saying that they haven’t been able to hear and that’s pretty cute X3

And then…

Oh, as soon as that brief call from Vanessa ended I had a suspicion of what might happen next. The boys were gone, specifically to eat a heart, the hunters were in their mind, and the sounds through the receiver were terrible. Doubts, doubts, doubts. Of course to us readers it’s plain to see that it wasn’t the boys even before cutting to their perspective. We know Vanessa has been possessed and now the hunter highly suspected it too. But stuff has barely had a chance to calm down, the book mentioned the ability of demons to be cunning and play the long game, and though y/n desperately wants to trust the boys, there’s been a salt shaker full of doubts accompanying them since after the reveal.

(Sidenote: “Your lovely, tired face” You know you overdo it constantly when tired is added to the list of your descriptors gfkjhdñs)

Ahhh Eclipse’s brief section makes the ones that follow hurt so much more. They’re reflecting how y/n will trust them. Does trust them. They’re so hopeful and tentatively happy hhhhhhhhhhhh So when they see all the signals that something is wrong. That they are being regarded so carefully, just ouch. The “What are you afraid of?” Pain. Pain because just last chapter y/n assured them desperately that they weren’t afraid of them. But now it feels like they are, but Moon asks because they remember that, and it must be confusing and that fear that their heart is scared of them lingers.

And oh gosh, not surprised that no hunters survived that but darn it, of course Singh is the first one to be found. Since the trio’s appearance I had a small feeling that oh no something will happen, but I had the hope that after last chapter’s escape maaaaybe they would get to walk away (mainly Singh, sorry I got attached gfdhsgñ). But oof. What a gruesome end for all of them. Cafaro even was dismembered and a hundred percent sure that happened before he killed her. It really highlights how sadistic the cornfield demon is.

But ooooough, the heartbreak of what happens next! I have to wonder how orchestrated it all was, because dang, that notification calling attention to the phone though. Right were all the ugliness of the consumed hearts is on display, basically triggering a bad flashback for them. All factors combined made such a recipe for disaster. And how could it not? Reading Henry’s book, it would seem clear that each demon seems to specialize on eating a single type of organ and so far none of them have been repeated. It’s Eclipse’s word against the evidence, and given their history their word doesn’t hold up to much yet. (But it will after this, I think. Even when everything points at them, the truth is the truth.)

And oh. Oh, I say!

“a warning echoes your name in betrayal” That right there? Hurts. 

Because god. Y/n is so sure they have been betrayed again themselves. They’re feeling used and stupid and gullible. They think the boys are trying to save face to continue fooling them (even if they actually cared a little). And so they fool them right back. Y/n thinks they are playing along with the demon’s game, and use their care (which they no longer think is genuine) for them to trick them. And what a way to do it! They know when they are vulnerable, the boys’ response is to comfort them. And I just knew they were scheming when they admitted out loud to being scared. Because, if I remember correctly, they’ve never done that before. Yes, they have expressed that they do feel fear when they hunt, but always they try to put a brave face during the fact. They hate looking weak and incapable. They’re always the one swearing that it will be fine and they’ll take care of things. And internally that’s their mindset right now. They use what they know about the cryptid to set a trap. They bait them and they trap them.

And oh!! I know it’s a tense moment but I felt a bit validated when they pointed out precisely what stood out to me when they killed the hunter back then. The fact that it was right after they got told about their encounter with the other demon. It does seem like a very damning detail after all. And they plead that they never meant for this to hurt them, but the hunter is now panicking with hurt and trauma induced panic and definitely not in a place to want to listen to them.

(Sidenote: “You are abysmal” oooo that seems like such a low blow because it’s precisely the word the boys have used before. When they asked to stay and prove they are not. That they are not a complete monster. And right here y/n tells them that no, they are)

So! What I said last time about them fearing being the hunted ones, huh? They did get to experience it in the end. And in such a raw way. Unable to flee or fight back even if they wanted to. A paper and a couple of words away from ceasing their lengthy existence. Helplessness in a way they have likely never experienced, even with the seal, because then they could still move their vessel. Sun and Moon stared at death in the face and it was crying.

But hhhh if it was their lies and casual violence that nearly brought their demise, it was their love that spared them. In every act of caring, in every moment they spent together with the hunter. Because they love them back. As much as it makes them ashamed right now they do. And it must be such a conflicting realization when they were this close to an exorcism, but I can only imagine what they saw in their face. Grief at the idea of killing them? Their steely look suddenly falling apart as soon as they looked at them? Aaaaaagh! And then the warning 

(Sidenote: oh I’m just thinking of how long they’re gonna have to sit there with the corpses! I know it’s probably not much to them, and their mind is mostly occupied with worrying about how to fix this mess, but I can’t help being curious about it. They probably never lingered long around any other victims, theirs or otherwise. Admittedly, half a day is not long for a demon who has lived as long as them, but as the hours pass I wonder if they’d turn their thoughts to the fallen hunters for a bit.)

(Sidenote to the sidenote: Now they sit in a heartless room. Both physically and metaphorically :( )

Oof, and then we cut back to y/n. Facing the nightmare, but in no shape to do so. But they are very objective oriented, and so when Vanessa is right there and she needs help and they can do something about it, they push everything aside to focus. They find their strength in that. But oh gosh. Their kind heart might be one of the things that saved the boys, but right now it’s what betrayed the hunter. They saw Vanessa in distress and couldn’t resist running to her aid even when they were not finished with the incantation.

And then, after the episode triggered by the photo, now they see what was supposed to remain just a nightmare become a reality right there. And of course the nightmare recognizes them back. Aaaaaa when he licks the scar!!! Like, I didn’t know it was possible to rub salt over a closed wound! But then again, it never really closed in a way, did it? And now as they stare at their night terror in the flesh, now instead of (or added to) the regret of having failed as a hunter in their own eyes, there is also the regret of what they did to Eclipse, right at that moment when there is nothing they can do to fix it.

Ahhh, I was always so sure that in that first encounter the demon meant to possess y/n!! The way you describe it if I remember correctly, was that they felt trapped by those eyes and it seemed to me more like losing themselves rather than being about to die. Of course it could be he was just prolonging it, but I wonder if there is a certain affinity that would make a demon consider a human a good vessel.

(Sidenote: again very tense moment during the possession, but I was also so excited to see the reference to Help Wanted, with the locked door and the chains and the darkness as they were possessed. Even the bit about everything turning purple when it happens in game!)

Ok, ok, I also just have some rambling about predictions and stuff about the future! That seal is definitely not gonna stay in that pocket just doing nothing. I wonder if they would use it on themselves to trap the demon and guarantee an exorcism where it can’t escape, or maybe the cornfield demon somehow learns about it and uses it against the boys to hinder them when they eventually arrive (though this one seems less likely to me). And following that train of thought, I’m wondering how the exorcism might go (if there is one) to free y/n. They are certainly strong-willed, but also very quick to deem themselves as expendable to get the job done. (Twice regarding the vampires for example, willing to let the vampires drink from them to kill them with holy water even if it could kill them and also when they talk about finishing themselves if they were to turn into a vampire. Also once when just after the reveal, they contemplated not letting Eclipse have a fresh human vessel.)

Also, I’m just so unsure about what might happen to Vanessa! She has spent the most amount of time with this demon. He might kill her, but it’s just as likely that he would abandon her there. She’s dehydrated and famished, and physically weak. If he were to leave her there, it would likely be with the hope that she will die to the elements. Though it would certainly provide a moment for the boys to find her. And Vanessa has a lot of valuable info on this demon’s modus operandi.

And ahhhh I’m also just thinking about the aftermath! Y/n probably desperately wants to apologize to them. But with their self-doubt and how they told them to stay away, they might think they will not come for them. So when everything is said and done, when Eclipse does come for them, I can see a lot of teary exhausted apologies and maybe, just maybe a new vow being made. 

This last part was so scattered but gjkdhñg lots of thoughts as always hehe

Awesome chapter as always, Naff! Thanks for the pain, looking forward to more! X3 

And that’s it from me! I am so excited for the resolution! I can’t believe we are almost there!

Chaotik, I am spinning you around, ahhh! I have been rereading this over and over, and I am smooching your big brain *mwah*

One thing I have to talk about because you pointed out (and so far the only one to have done so) is the moment Y/N said "I'm scared" because as you put it, "...they have expressed that they do feel fear when they hunt, but always they try to put a brave face during the fact. They hate looking weak and incapable. They’re always the one swearing that it will be fine and they’ll take care of things."

That really is them using the boys' care against them, as at this point, Y/N intends to use it to play along, letting the boys' think Y/N is still so gullible and frail (much to their own chagrin) and distracting Sun with their sudden need for comfort. Y/N has never admitted to being scared in the middle of an encounter or otherwise gruesome scene. This was entirely about trapping a demonic cryptid in a salt circle.

I'm really happy you noticed that! Y/N is still a cryptid hunter and they are intelligent and cunning when it comes to their craft. Of course, they were oblivious to their dear friend being a cryptid, but now that there's little doubt in their mind that Eclipse just slaughtered fellow cryptid hunters? Y/N can't let them go. Y/N was on the hunt, they just couldn't finish it ;-; (and for the best, it would turn out hehe)

Thank you so much! I look forward to your comments and I love your analysis! I'm so excited for the ending ♥ Thanks, babe!

[emotionalsupport-ljh]

Alright I'm gonna have to say something. There is a lot of info going around that doesn't make sense. There have also been bad arguments on both sides. I'm gonna try to synthesize what I've learned and what I think here so bear with me.

MiA has been on air for 6 years. It has aired globally; in America it aired on Adult Swim. It's on crunchyroll and Hulu if you have a subscription. Is it more likely that A. Anime fans are all p*dos or B. The anime was sold and heavily edited for marketability? I don't believe the amount of anime buffs that have talked so highly about it for so long would have done that had they known the truth.

Another point, we are citing a live from Aug. 2022. Why didn't anyone say anything then? In said live, Woozi is asked to recommend anime. He starts listing anime he had just started then ultimately recommends Komi Can't Communicate. That is it. As for the other idols, they most likely engaged with an edited version that kept some darkness but not the horrible awful parts.

It is not impossible for people to unwittingly enjoy something that is later revealed to be problematic. As far as anime goes, AoT and Ranking of Kings are examples of this. Stuff like that happens in western like in the cases of Harry Potter or Twilight. I will admit, I don't know when it was revealed that there was editing done to MiA, but it has been a recommended anime for years.

The source that posted is called Pannchoa and is notorious for causing problems, mistranslating, misunderstanding, and lying. I've also seen misinfo being spread by antis who want attention. Twitter is a cesspool, and unfortunately, a lot of children these days, especially american children, are victims of a deteriorating education system and lack reading comprehension skills as well as being chronically online. I'm a grown-up. I'm an adult. I'm not saying you have to agree but just take a moment to listen.

Many people have jumped to conclusions and straight up misunderstood things. I've had to cut off favs before, but I always read as much as I can first and make sure I understand before deciding. I hope this blows over quick; I cannot imagine the heartache and stress these boys are going through, or anyone else who likes anime who has posted about it, recommended it, or enjoys it. Let's be productive and drop the manga artist and company who sold it and everyone involved in its censoring and make this not happen again.

The argument that "they are grown men and can watch whatever" does not help. The argument that "watching true crime doesn't make you a murderer" does not help. What helps is finding what is real and not real.

If you're going to try and argue, pick someone else or pick another post. I will not engage. I've said my piece.

[waythroughtheice]

God fucking damn it. Maybe I should write something. Just to get my brain to stop.

Geo Wily au.

Kelvin comes back to a cult that is not run by his wife (did nobody read his backup plans? They said to introduce the cult to his wife and not drag his son into anything until he was an adult. Why did they? Geo is a child!?!?!) but his son. His son. Who is a superhero. A superhero the world is convinced is a Hikari. Geo. Child. How?

Grampa Wily is laughing.

The Cult refuses to let Kelvin take back over.

Geo was the best leader they had. Geo gave them treats for good behavior! He didn't immediately stop the money laundering schemes (Geo: What's a money laundering?). Geo is the Cult's dad now. (Geo, very tired: I have no idea how we got here and am afraid to ask. All I did was give them stickers and candy for not committing crimes.)

Grandpa Wily refuses to leave Geo. Every time Kelvin takes him he just device hops back to Geo with Omega-Xis's help. Grandpa's favourite.

Kazuma, meanwhile. Is dealing with the dreaded twins. They are. So chaotic. Kazuma kind of wishes he could trade circumstances because at least the Cult can't device hop away from consequences. Please stop getting him banned from locations.

I like to imagine in SF3 all Netnavis became Wizards. Grandpa Wily is free(ish). Granpa has a larger area to encourage children towards evil. Lan and Hub are also commiting crimes. They are breaking and entering to get their boy the best they can. Because it's been 200 years, the laws can't have changed that much, right? They don't even realise. Dr Wily is following the law better than the chaos twins is what I'm saying.

At somepoint the Wily Cult becomes Geo's Cult. Because they adore him. Geo can do no wrong in their eyes. Except working with the cops (generalized). Copper is the exception. They like him. He gives them fun tidbits of info in exchange for not wreaking havoc for a week. (Geo finally asked an adult for help and boy howdy he got it.)

I like to imaging SF2 has a lot of Cult saving lost children shenanigans. Buddicus? No. Bud is kidnapped home before Geo gets there. There are a few memory issues but the familiar environment fixes that quick.

Hope only learns about the Cult when Kelvin asks her how she's been keeping them in check.

Funnily enough, with Geo in charge the Cult grows. Also funny is when he goes back to school half the faculty is made up of cult members. (They were worried about him.)

Pat gets recruited by Geo when he finds out about the dump. Geo's only intentional recruit. (Geo may have tried with Solo. Solo now has a place to go to for help. Solo rarely goes but sometimes he gets sick and just crashes there.)

Grampa Wily approves of this method of world takeover. Kind and just ruler accidentally spreading influence? Sure.

Lan and Hub approve because hey. It's not murder they guess. Kazuma is very tired. But hey. Friendly rivalries are fun.

Kelvin is--so not ready for when he comes back. He expects to find a cult completely under control of his lovely wife, his son safe and sound, and--

What do you mean Geo is the Boss of the Wily Cult.

GRANDPA GET OVER HERE--

Grandpa Wily has had many grandkids over the years and loved them all. He loves Kelvin of course, but.....Kelvin is a goody-two shoes. Geo has sense. Geo is subverting the enemy. Geo is a primo-candidate for world take over.

Geo is his favorite.

Kazuma eventually, in a fit of frustration, introduces the twins to Luna (big mistake), Geo's cult (bigger mistake), and to WAZA (biggest mistake). The Twins recognize Luna as Chad's descendent, grow appalled at her neglectful parents, and call in Protoman.exe for help. But, ah.....all the Netnavis come back, and suddenly all the kids have very watchful NetNavis as as their Wizards. And with the Real Wave technology, they can pop out human sized and interact with the world whenever they like. Is this what parents are like? Weird.

The Twins join Geo's cult for the lols, and quickly become its marketing people. The cult spreads.

The Twins subvert WAZA also for lols, and also for the massive breaches in privacy the police do. This becomes a massive thing a couple years in the future.

Geo eventually becomes World Leader as an adult, because the world loves him. Kazuma is dying in the background. Geo gives him all the paperwork.

[nikethestatue]

Unpopular opinion: I think Zodiac Academy has PHENOMENAL writing. The prose maybe not so much and I understand some things are very silly. I get there’s a lot of “unnecessary” pages and povs. But I totally disagree when I see people saying the books are bad and are only skim reading for bluelance and tory and darius. I love the plot and I love how it builds from silliness in book 1 to epic battles and evil tyrants up to book 8. I love the way all the characters have developed thus far. I love the themes that have played out throughout the story. I love the worldbuilding. To me it’s clear the authors put a lot of thought into everything and the plot is plotting. It seems very well planned out. I struggle to find many plot holes whereas with *ahem* other authors there’s a plot hole every chapter. Do I wish the books were like 300 pages shorter sure but do I think they’re still 10/10 overall yes!

Same! I know they overwrite, BUT, their world building is solid. It's not complicated, but the way they even introduce certain things, as if we learn them like the twins--from nothing, is so smart. Unlike SJM, who dumped 100 pages of info without any real explanation in CC, in ZA it's done as a lesson, simple, quick, with a thoughtful explanation. And suddenly you just get it.

Also, the development of characters is pretty amazing. Every single person in the world hated Seth for 4 books straight. And the fact that they managed to make him one of the most beloved characters by now is actually remarkable.

He is so beyond universally hated for so long and then the shift is so organic, and so well done, that he becomes a reasonably good dude, while still staying Seth. They've not changed anyone's personalities too, which I think is an achievement that few authors can pull off. Orion doesn't become sweet and sensible and gentle. He is still a massive asshole, yet you just...get him. He still throws coconuts at students' heads.

I've read pretty much all of their books, far beyond ZA, and what they can do over and over again is maintain the integrity of their characters. They don't suddenly become 'good'. You follow their actions and they begin to make sense and you understand what drives them, but they don't fundamentally change, which to me, as a writer, is actually very difficult to do, and I admire that ability.

Also they can wring emotions out of their readers like nobody's business.

I don't care if people judge me, but I love ZA. It's my home. I never felt the need to write ZA fanfiction because I never needed to change anything about the characters or the story. To me, it's nearly perfect as it is.

[heartfelttry]

on a tiktok comment, i mentioned having taken notes of thepandaredd's OCs and whatnot to be able to name-drop them once i am un-sickly enough to commit to writing DC fanfics (and i mentioned them in a comment to begin with because either thepandredd has two OCs named Ted now, or we got a prequel or reboot of their original Ted OC) and it got over 1 Like which is all the attention i needed to post my notes lmao

(it just took me a while to post bc i got Too Into My Own Head about having maybe missed something, so i re-watched all thepandaredd's not-Comic-Book-Club videos (tho i do enjoy those, you should watch them) on his yt channel before posting this)

real quick, please note, i did leave all my headcanons in here because i am emotionally attached to them, but i did make said hcs labeled in blue and i made them tiny so you can know where to avoid them if you so wish. that was my big thing i want anybody reading to be aware of. onto the smaller notes of interest (no pun intended, i just prefer small-text when i babble and over-explain), these notes are messy chaotically organized. bc my brain is messy chaotically organized. (also: i have dyslexia and chronic memory loss, so please do forgive the accidental missspellings and the not-accidental "isn't this too much detail?" sections) this is all copy-pasted from my notes with some additions made for your guys' convenience (i put in links where i remembered links go (im sure i missed some citations i could have linked and forgot to even cite links in many other places, ugh, i do not want to cite everything, i gave up, i know my notes have evidence even if i didn't link the video every time, you fact-check, i'm tired lmao rip), i colored the text sometimes, i clarified things i theorize sometimes so things make sense to non-mind-readers, the works. i always speak to a hypothetical audience in my notes tho, so, shockingly, that wasn't actually added for you. idk why i p much always do that; i just accept it. but you're welcome). feel free to copy and edit this down further for your own use to update. i know i plan to update my private notes when new info/OCs come out, but idk if i will update this public post, ever, but hey! maybe!

also, above all: please follow thepandaredd (he/they) on your favorite social media of choice. support the guy on patreon. buy merch. all the good stuff. here's the linktree to all the important things related to thepandaredd's socials and whatnot. enjoy their creations, he's really fun lol

● was posted: 30 March 2024 ● was last updated: 2 April 2024 (reason for update: i realized i forgot the Reboot Hand, updated on March 31st + forgot to include a bullet-point on Bill being anti-smoking, and forgot to say who set Bill on fire, updated on April 1st + realized i got confused and my math on Bill's age was wrong as i originally said he was a minimum of "16+ years older than the 10 year-old Robin he met" when he is actually a minimum of 6+ years older to therefore make him a minimum of 16 years old to Robin's 10, updated on April 2nd)

↳ here is my "after posting this" thoughts if you are curious. it consists entirely of a friend of mine encouraging me to publish some texts i sent her answering "what was my favorite thing i learned?" and "do i have any questions?" (from 30 March 2024 original post) ↳ ill maybe make another one of these "after posting this thoughts" if i ever do a BIG update on this? who knows lol

also, please note i have yet to see any thepandaredd twitch streams (i just know my brain and my brain likes edited content, esp if it is short or short-ish bc my brain loves that shit. i like Dimension 20 more than Critical Role, i like ConnorDawg's gaming youtube channel more than CDawgVA's twitch or his VOD youtube channel that said edited gaming videos all come from, and i like audio dramatizations of books way more than audiobooks. it is just how i unfortunately or fortunately work), so idk if any additional info has been said there. i have heard good things about thepandaredd's Stream Dump youtube channel tho, so do go to that aforementioned linktree and check it out! if i ever am able to get my brain to accept twitch VODs, and not just zone out and disassociate when i should be engaged, i will delete this section (hence why it is under the Read More) and update accordingly ✌️

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★★★ AGENT OF THE REBOOT (DC only so far, created by thepandaredd. probably should have a Marvel equivalent or else also exist in Marvel? or maybe the TVA counts, idk, i havent seen "Loki")

● has one confirmed worker of an unknown name and unknown pronouns (hc/theories on pronouns: However, since this character's form can change, one can assume this agent character takes on the pronouns of the original form (eg. the character did take on Bill The Henchman's form and Bill uses he/him pronouns, so assumedly this agent character would accept he/him pronouns while using Bill's form. it feels respectful towards the original form. however, this is an argument one can use as a hc and is not confirmed. i hate JKR, but remember the scene where everyone used polyjuice potions to pretend to be Harry Potter in the last book and they all kept their original pronouns despite having Harry's face? like, as an explicit example, Hermione still had she/her pronouns while fully transformed into having Harry's body? weirdly pro-trans scene for a terf to have written. but yeah, same could go for this character. so an argument can be made both ways); but if i ever write about this agent, until proven otherwise: my hc and what i plan to do is either they/them or a neo-pronoun for this character due to a mixture of headcanon (kinda cool for an organization to be totally nameless, ageless, faceless, and genderless (maybe even of a omniuniversal hive-mind? idk, we don't know anything), so i assume this is that) and a lack of clarity/details on this specific agent character. but there you go, there are all the options one can assume for this agent character's pronouns. adjacently, personally, if i do a neo-pronoun for this character when writing: i think i'll either do the "the royal we", a classic; or i will do the definite article, as recently popularized in "Doctor Who", but idk, we'll see, might just do "they/them" for simplicity sake. or maybe we'll get pronouns if the Agent comes back, who fucking knows). (hc name of character: remember that Iron Man MCU joke about "What? Phil? No, his first name is Agent" about Agent Phil Coulson of SHIELD? yeah, if i write for this character, i will be assuming an acceptable name is "Agent, just Agent")

● Introduced as "I'm an agent of The Reboot". unsure if organization is "The Reboot" or "Agents Of The Reboot" or if its called something else and he just did layman terms for it so that it was "agent of the reboot"? i have no idea. i personally most prefer Agents Of The Reboot, or layman terms if i or someone else can come up with a cooler name. (if this was Marvel and i had seen "Loki", there would probably be a Time Variance Authority (TVA) joke to make here). could also be just a one-man thing where Agent Of The Reboot is the character's name/species, and they are the only fucking one?? idk, we aren't supposed to know shit about this character, they are supposed to be a mystery, it makes sense that nothing is confirmed and that nothing makes sense, idk what to tell you

↳ ThePandaRedd normally introduces character name differentiations via a text box saying who is playing who, but this guy's just said " ? ". what a fun meta detail lol

● Helps characters reboot and "get to where you're supposed to go"

● This agent/The organization is responsible for "Crisis on Infinite Earth", "New 52" reboots

● Reboot ability is activated via snapping. very Thanos of the character, but sure, why not, it's a cool fucking ability

● Copies other person's face because "it's what your brain will recognize the easiest". Visually, to readers, it looks like a pixelated version of it (i assume that aspect is for viewer's clarity of who is speaking when. kind of like how "Avatar: The Last Airbender"'s air is supposed to be invisible (y'know, as air generally is) to the characters within the show, but is drawn so viewers can see what Aang is bending and how. but. like. for character design)

↳ Was introduced helping Bill The Henchman, more about that in Bill's section. Said Bill's storyline "got too convoluted" and instead of fixing the storyline, Bill was deemed for a reboot-- well, the whole universe was taken to start over, actually. 

↳ speaks with a slight computer-y voice-changer effect. makes the character kind of sound like they come from an 8-bit video-game.

↳ my hc: is that this kind of works as a mixture of "The Digital Circus" and @/cholv0q (of tiktok)'s Alastor of "Hazbin Hotel" re-design (their linktree is over here btw). where the character kind of just comes from this early-internet days (which is when there was more widespread bingeing and cross-references of comics, due to them being uploaded digitally and fan-forums citing themselves and whatnot (which, fun fact: apparently, January 1, 1983 is considered the Internet's official birthday. so that is the fucking earliest we could be talking about) (i know also the idea of comics in academia, like getting analyzed in essays, became more popularized around this time. but i don't know how much of that is causation and correlation. it's still considered new and novel for a campus to include graphic novels in a required reading list, though it is on the edge of being "uncommon but welcome" nowadays. English classes entirely focused on graphic novels, albums, and comics are still a v new-ish thing. but im getting off-topic, that was just my experience in going to college in the ~2020s anyway). and ergo, comic companies had to care a bit more about continuity and it was less of a "well, it depends on the writer if they care about that" thing. hence, the kind of "the demand formed and so the need was filled" creation of this character/organization? (not as in "ah, i see a job oppurtunity here" type of "demand formed, and we can fulfill that need". but as in "the universe is ever-expanding and ever-repairing itself" kind of mysterious cosmic horror. kind of like Marvel Comics' The Watchers but 50× the eldritch horror. like whatever force in the universe made Earth's deep sea creatures and DC-Comics-version-of-Mars' white martians? that force played some early desktop computer horror games and said "let me put this on my pinterest board as inspo for this new project i'm working on" type of shit. nobody knows where this fucker/these fuckers came from, they just didn't exist before and suddenly they came into being, fully formed. very unsettling) and due to the tech of the time, the voice filter and pixelation of the face make even more sense. how does "The Digital Circus" apply to this? just the sense of "omnipotence in an old fucking desktop computer technology" really. as for the @/cholv0q's Alastor of "Hazbin Hotel" re-design bit, i just really fucking like that Chol included this bit about "changing[ this character's vocal abilities to come from] an old radio[ on his chest,] where his real voice comes from, instead of his mouth or throat". i really fucking like that idea so im yoinking it and switching the tech away from a 1920s radio. and i think that would be fucking sick to apply to this Agent character considering their shapeshifting, pixelation, implied vocal changes (i assume the voice changes with the form and its not That Voice with every form, just That Voice Filter ontop of the everchanging voice), voice filter, and general uncanny-valley-ness. just imagine a pixelated version of your face talking to you about rebooting your life while never opening their mouth, as the uncanny low-rez doppleganger version of you talks to you through a fucking 80s PC speaker lodged in its throat/clavicle area, sounding like the earliest versions of a voice-acted horror video-game. i love it. i think it maintains the mystery about "how the fuck, whomst the fuck" while upping the creepy to be even creepier, to me at least. plus, then there's the whole "snaps to reboot" ability, yes, but now we got the "Video-Game Boss with a Second Phase" built in right there because if snapping does all that reality-shattering/-bending nonsense then what the fuck do you think happens if the Agent does finally open their fucking mouth???

● also, this symbol flashed up while Bill the Henchman fell post-snap. i normally wouldn't think to screenshot such a thing, but i thought it was odd upon my most recent re-watch (bc anxiety about posting this publicly and maybe missing something, you get it) that it kind of has a hand-shape inside it? which a hand symbol + the act of snapping with one's hand correlates in an interesting way, not to mention the timing of this appearing IMMEDIATELY after the snap. but maybe it is a comic reference i am missing? maybe it is related to the Agents of the Reboot getting their own merch of some kind someday? do they get a logo, does that make sense for them to have, are they a team or...? idk. but i added it here just in case it is pertinent in some way (excuse the low resolution)

● the fucker (/tone indicator: affectionate) is within this compilation video, i will only link this video one more time in Bill The Henchman's section (below, under the "People" section)

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★★★ RED HOOD'S ANTI-HERO ACCIDENT ASSURANCES (DC only. created in a comment within thepandaredd's tiktok that then thepandaredd replied to and acted out. the comment was by @/timelordpoet1273 on tiktok. i probably didn't need to write this one but it made me laugh so im including it)

● timelordpoet273's comment: "Red Hood just starts his own insurance company. He names it Anti-Hero Accident Assurances. Nobody answers the phone, and the voiceail is swear words."

● thepandaredd, uh, i mean, Jason Todd's said voicemail (yes, i made a fucking transcription lmao pls let me live, i have chronic memory loss and my notes are my lifeblood): [voice 1] "Hello. And thank you for calling Red Hood's Anti-Hero Accident Assurances. If you are calling in regard to one of our anti-heroes, please stay on the line for a recorded message." [voice 2] "Now I know for a goddamn fact that you did not just call an insurance agency to try to file a claim against a bunch of anti-heroes that kill people for a living. Do you have any idea how much ammo fucking costs? We are out here spending our entire life savings to buy you the briefest little moments of the only life you will ever live, and you have the audacity to try and file a claim against us? What the fuck did we do, shoot out your knee-cap? Fuck you. Whatever we did is going to save you down the fucking line. Goddamn— Hang up your fucking phone."

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★★★ SUPERB PROWERS: SUPERHERO INSURANCE (DC only so far, created by thepandaredd. Marvel equivalent is "Damage Control")

↳ colloquially, it's apparently called "Superb Prowers Insurance Agency"

● Motto: "Superb Prowers insurance. If it's not a bird and it's not a plane, give us a ring and we'll do our thang." (note: Todd Andrews hates saying this at the beginning of every phone-call)

● Covers civillian damages done by superheroes + super-battles. "Our team mostly covers superhero and super-powered related accidents and injuries?"

↳ Does not cover supervillains (from damages done to said villains by superheroes) (however: Bill the Henchman was covered by them for the loss of his bones)

● is up the street from Vitriol Vindications (which is insurance for supervillains and the damages done to them by superheroes)

● confirmed workers: Todd Andrews (is one of their representatives, as in "I represent Superb Prowers Agency". more on Todd Andrews is below, has their own section with the other OCs in "People"); maybe/maybe not to be confused with Todd the Goonion Rep (section is below, under the "People" heading. where he works, The First Universal Henchmen's Union, is below, under the "Associations" heading) and/or maybe/maybe not confused with the Todd that is Bill's friend from high school (below, under "People") bc idk, guess they could all be the same guy? idk, i would assume no but maybe

↳ Todd Andrews' outfit is in their own character section, which could arguably be following the company's dress-code for its workers or be their employees' uniform or something

↳ in the first video Todd Andrews used a cell phone and paced around. second video on, Todd Andrews is seated, assumedly at a computer, and is wearing a headset with microphone attachment. not wireless. assumedly, the later is standard for all workers, the former was just Todd Andrews briefly based on materials thepandaredd had available for said skit, i mean an eccentric habit or done for the purpose of the documentary-interview style that only happened in the first video

● only one villain has called the agency, and it was Killer Shark, which that is both his civillian- and villain-name. so idk if the workers call villains by their civillian or villain identity when talking directly to them (i also assume "Cassandra", who is a few bullet-points down but still within the Superb Prowers section, is not Todd Andrews calling Cassandra Cain (or any other DC character phoentically named "Cassandra/Kassandra/etc") by her first name, esp since thepandaredd likes to play Cassandra as nonverbal in skits and Todd Andrews was on the phone. but there is also ways to use live-captions and text-to-speech, along with Deaf/HOH and nonverbal web-cam/chat services to have a hotline person call for you and whatnot, but i assume that's not what is happening here, i digress. i assume it's just a random Cassandra, and workers don't call heroes by their civillian forename)

● Insurances:

↳ ● Flashpoint Insurance: for damages in alternate timelines

↳ ● offers 2 different Gotham plans. (1) The Batman Plan; the Batman Plan has a Reckless Robin extension (only covers current Robin/s. does not cover former Robins). (2) The Bat-Family Plan (assumedly covers former Robins)

↳ ● Crisis Coverage: is a little different from Flashpoint coverage (is not explained how lol)

↳ ● Green Arrow coverage

↳ ● Bird Insurance: coverage for bird-themed superheroes, not actual birds 

↳ ● Multi-Verse Insurance: "No, sir, if a alternate universe version of you has multi-verse insurance, it does mean you are also insured."

↳ ● has Home Insurance and Buisness Insurance ("Uh, let me check. Hey, boss, are lairs covered under home insurance or buisness insurance?")

↳ not a type of insurance but important questions that have implications about the place's insurance stuff: "Okay, well, answer me this: did Superman punch your wall or did he get flown through your wall as the result of a punch?" (later) "No, you see, you're covered for him punching your wall. Not being punched through your wall." ■ "How many times do I need to tell you, Cassandra? We stopped covering sky beams last year after the Zod attack." ■ "Did you get punched by a Robin or by a former Robin? 'Cause you have the Batman plan, and that only covers one of those." ■ "What do you mean the city is just gone? What does that mea--?!" ■ "Yes, but do you have proof your house was still there before Coast City was destroyed?" ■ "Can you confirm that it was a bat-arang that hit you?" ■ "Okay, but which Superboy? Yes, it's important!" ■ "Okay, but did you get the license plate number? I don't care if it was the Bat-Mobile! Yes or no?" ■ "Okay, but which color arrow were you attacked by? No, it is important, you only have Green Arrow coverage." ■ "M'am-- M'am! The premiums are lower in Iowa than Metropolis because it's Metropolis."

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★★★ VITRIOL VINDICATIONS: VILLAINS INSURANCE (DC only so far, created by thepandaredd. Marvel equivalent is "Damage Control")

● "Vitriol Vindications: verifying villainous violations, how may I help you?"

● is insurance coverage for supervillain (for damages done to them by superheroes) (does not cover Goon Union violation claims)

● is down the street from Superb Prowers: Superhero Insurance

● knows supervillains' civillian identities

● hotline workers can curse on the phone (eg. "I'm sorry, sir, but if you didn't want food poisoning then why in the hell did you eat a Joker Fish in the first place?")

↳ also, they can smoke while on the job

● confirmed workers: unnamed character (pronouns unknown). spoke with a gravely voice, assumedly from smoking as he smokes at work (what i assume is a cigarette anyway? or a cigar? it could also be a joint, i got no clue), and also an accent (im not good at identifying accents, idk from where exactly, it sounded vaguely the East Coast variety of American). appearance of said character includes a brown jacket with sherpa lining over a black shirt, had gray pants on. (my hc for name: Sol Abagnale. the Abagnale part is in reference after "Frank Abagnale Jr", a real life white-collar criminal who has a famous film as well as semi-famous musical under the title "Catch Me If You Can" (he also kind of inspired the show "White-Collar" in the sense of how the irl Abagnale became an expert consolutant helping catch other criminals. he has recorded lectures and everything, his analytical work is insane) where one of his most routine crimes was conning banks and insurance and whatnot, and also the IRS caught his dad (Frank Senior) who Junior learned a lot of his crimes from. feels fitting. the first name has to do with me kind of fudging the name "Saul" into a more unisex phonetic variant, "Sol" (which, according to BehindTheName.com, the Jewish version of "Sol" is masculine and the Spanish+Portugeese version of "Sol" is feminine, so "Sol" itself is unisex enough for me. though, technically Saul and Sol are not related, they do SOUND very similar which is the sticking point for me), in tribute to Saul Goodman of "Breaking Bad"/"Better Call Saul" fame who did a lot of insurance fraud as a lawyer. so my pitch is combining the name of two white-collar criminals, yeah, what can i say, i love intertextual references)

↳ appearance aspects about the worker mentioned above could also be notable here on whether or not if it is related to the company's dress-code, their employees' uniform, and whatnot

↳ workers wear a headset with microphone attachment. not wireless. they also have a swivel chair with arms.

● Insurances:

↳ ● Life insurance

↳ ● Anti-Life insurance: "M'am, I'm sorry but death by Parademons is nor covered under the Anti-Life insurance plan." (which? i assume?? is a censored version of a Death insurance plan? idk anything about insurance vocabularly terms)

↳ ● Discrimination in the workplace? (im surprised that isn't Goonion paperwork, idk) ("Well, if you didn't want discrimination in the workplace, then you shouldn't have been a goon for Gorilla Grodd.")

↳ ● the Two-Face Policy ("While I cannot exactly stop you from getting the Two-Face policy, I will warn you that coverage there is pretty 50/50." → "I'm sorry, I had to, it was right there.")

↳ not a type of insurance but important questions that have implications about the place's insurance stuff: "No, Mr. Cobblepot, you cannot put life insurance policy on your penguins if you are the ones who strapped bombs to them." ■ "What do you mean your contract is in the form of a riddle?"

↳ also not a type of insurance per sey but idk what this is but i feel like i should note it down: "Oh, no, you'd be surprised: the Joker actually offers an incredible dental plan."

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★★★ EVIL LLP: VILLIANOUS ACCOUNTING (DC only so far, created by thepandaredd. probably should have a Marvel equivalent or else also exist in Marvel, idk if such exists)

● "Evil LLP: villainous accounting, how may I help you?"

● calls supervillains both by their civillian names and their villain names, but WAY moreso calls them by their villain names

● fun fact: it is a fandom joke that the Joker does not mess with the IRS (thepandaredd theorizes it is because the Joker doesn't want to end up like Al Capone and get put in actual-"you can't plead insanity this time"-prison), so Joker would be diligent about tax season (and hate it) and contacting his accountant (and hate that too), neato

● people working the hotline can curse to the customers

● confirmed workers: unnamed character (pronouns unknown). said character's appearance includes having worn glasses as well as a maroon-purpleish button-up, long-sleeve and with gray pants. drinks out of a red, tall drinkwear (no lid, no straw, not a tumbler) which is an odd enough detail i thought i would mention it (maybe he works remote and it is their kitchenware? maybe the Evil LLP office just has that type of kitchenware? idk. i know its just thepandaredd's kitchenware and isn't meant to be scrutinized, but i am detail-oriented and have AuDHD, let me live). (hc name: Brooklyn Kennedy Collector. because i recenrly found out Collector is a real surname and that feels fitting for an accountant. also, i think "The Collector" is a kind of cool villain allias? maybe this accountant was a taxes-related villain before pivoting? idk, probably not, but what i do really like is the idea of experienced villains scaring newbies with boogeyman stories of "The Collector" and about not paying your taxes on time as a way of hazing them before their first appointment with this specific character from Evil LLP who is like "What? No? Turbotax is way scarier than me, the fuck". as for Brooklyn, it is unisex, literally means "broken land" which feels fitting for a neutral person many territorial villains go to, as in the literal "groundbreaking" ceremony. but also Brooklyn can lead to the nickname "Brookie" which i think would be funny for this character to be like "...Only my [insert loved one here. eg: signicant other, sibling, etc] can get away with calling me that" when villains inevitably make Brookie The Bookie jokes. and i usually don't add middle-names to my hc names bc i usually only do middle-names if the culture the character is from has a middle-name as part of its naming conventions. but i gave this hc name one because "Brooklyn Collector" does not sound quiet like a real person's name, to me. but if you told me i went to school with a "Brooklyn Kennedy Collector" then that sounds vaguely familar and id be like "Oh? Remind me who they are?" rather than "What? We did?" with disbelief in my tone. i did look up what the name Kennedy means tho, on my beloved BehindTheName search-engine, which means either "armored head" (cool!) or "mishappen head" (rude!) which i think encompasses the level of mixed sanity-and-insanity you have to have in order to be villain's accountant lol)

↳ appearance aspects about the worker mentioned above could also be notable in case it is related to the company's dress-code, their employees' uniform, and so on

↳ workers wears a headset with microphone attachment. not wireless. they also have a swivel chair with arms.

● tax account comments and questions since i know next to nothing of tax info and will likely need this as reference if i ever include this company: "Joker, I need your tax returns yesterday. What the fuck do you mean you haven't filed them?" ■ "Black Manta, it says here you have an expense for the League of Villainous Chimney Sweepers, what the fuc--" ■ "So let me make sure I am understanding this correctly. You are going to hire a bunch of people to hide trophies all throughout the city? With what fucking money, Nigma?" ■ "Penny-Pincher, if you pay me again by mailing me a literal bag of fucking pennies, I will find you." ■ "Joker, I just got a call from the Goonion that you haven't been paying your workers? ...No, not killing them is not a form of legal tender!" ■ "Wait a minute, you buy all the penguins? Who is selling you that many penguins?! I thought you just found them!" ■ "Wait, Bizzaro, do you have the check or not? I don't understand!" ■ "Well, don't come crying to me when VOSCA gets on your ass. Yes, I said 'VOSCA': Villainous OSCA, keep up!" (i assume this was a continuation of the last line to the Joker, it feels implied, but idk) ■ "How do none of you understand how money works?!"

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★★★ THE FIRST UNIVERSAL HENCHMAN'S UNION (aka: THE GOONION, or sometimes THE GOON UNION) (DC only so far, created by thepandaredd. probably should have a Marvel equivalent or else also exist in Marvel, idk if henchman union exists there of if the Goonion is implied to also be there) (i have shockingly little info on this considering how often it is brought up. huh. NOTE TO SELF: to rewatch some of thepandaredd's youtube compilation videos to see if im missing anything)

● Their motto: "Facere Malum Stercore Tuto" which is Latin for "Do bad shit safely"

↳ according to thepandaredd's merch: "Established in 2000"? i feel like that is a joke or reference i am missing, which makes me unsure of how literally to take it. i would've assumed it was older. i mean. i guess it technically could have been? like, in the sense that these guys are labeled the "First Universal Goonion" which implies maybe some villains had their own union of goons (definitely not Joker considering his implied VOSCA violations, above, under Evil LLP's section, still within the "Associations" heading) before it became a overall branching DC thing? which, if so, i do not envy the fuckers who had to unionize the Joker or Lexcorp goons, they probably did some union-busting, esp pre-2000 if that as the year the Goonion became universal in that sense, jfc. (edit of note: i have found the Todd The Goon Rep skit within the 2021 July compilation video, i am definitely correct about Lexcorp union-busting at least ■ edit of note ×2: i aM FULLY CORRECT. 2024 March 1st (or the compilation due to come out after March is over, since it is still March as of editing this docket) has a skit with Bill The Henchman doing work-trips with long flights for the Joker. and the Joker says "Hahaha, [The Goonion] is not a real thing!" and "Just to remind you, if I see you peddling that Goonion garbage all over that Comic-con, I swear to god, I will come to your house and rip those femurs out myself". so the Joker has dismissively resentful anti-Goonion opinions to the point that would imply he would love to union-bust/ignore it.) (or maybe "universal" is a reference to "cross-fandoms/brands"? because there is a Cobra Command, "G.I. Joe" joke pre-Bill-reboot (look at Bill The Henchman's section below, under the "People" heading)? which their most famous and long-running comic form is with Marvel Comics (though they also had a run with DC Comics for two individual issues, as well as Devil's Due, IDW Publishing, Custom Comics, and more). but, as aforementioned: idk how the reboot plays into that, and also idk how seriously i should take that since it was a gag for a one-off skit. idk...) (edit: wait, i forgot Marvel Comics also has The Solomon Institute For The Criminally Insane (also, and more popularly, known as: The Taskmaster's Academy), which is a trade-school where Anthony Masters (Taskmaster) teaches henchmen how to hench and get them a type of goon-certification as per the nature of trade-school. which, fun fact, the students there are called "Taskmaster's Acolytes", and originally this school started as a front? but then Taskmater went "actually, I have found my passion" which is aw, so sweet, wish it wasn't about murder and crime. but yeah, i checked the wiki because i couldn't remember if we ever saw anyone's certificate and, apparently, graduating meant you were now cleared for super-villany. so while youre there, you're a henchman. when you graduate, you're a villain. wild. though still not a henchman union, like, irl, we have both "places to get a teaching certification" and also a "union for teachers". this is just adjacent additional item to Marvel's henchmen situation, not an equivalent to the Goonion if that makes sense. so. uh, there is also that in the middle of this "is the Goonion omniuniversal?" spiral i am in, and that is Marvel-only as far as i am aware. still worth mentioning tho)

● there's possibly member-training? assumedly it is villain specific training, as you get hired then trained bc we have seen that before (evidence: (1) a skit within this compilation where a newbie was given the run-down working to the Joker about the dress-code and "just take the fall" if Batman/Robin come (Bill the Henchman was in the background, off-screen), and (2) another skit from this compilation where Bill The Henchman himself was translating the meanings to the various Bat-fam symbols to a newbie goon and the Red Hood interrupted) but maybe it is Goonion overall-villain's-henchman training, i have no clue. but in a skit (from 2021 October) where a Mr. Freeze goon (actually is the Red Hood faking being a goon the whole time? or knocked said goon out and took their place? unclear) was being given shit by Bill for not wearing a mask during COVID (more on the Goonion's opinion on COVID face-masks below in a few bullet-points) came back with a Cobra helmet that said goon (The Red Hood) had trouble taking off, Bill grumbled "How the fuck did you make it out of training?" before helping (could be referring to Cobra training or Goonion? again, idk)

↳ which there are Bat-fam symbol code btw, idk if that skit's code was for all goons or just that specific villain's workplace: Yellow circle = Bruce Wayne (Batman) is in a good mood, will probably let you keep knee-caps □ No yellow circle, just a black bat = you're probably going to lose a couple of bones from Batman (idk if that is accurate post Bill the Henchman's reboot. anyway.) ■ Any variation of a red bat, spikey or otherwise = don't bother screaming, gunshots will be heard and that is enough warning. Likely is Kate Kane (Batwoman) who does not have a no-gun rule. could also be Jason Todd (Red Hood) who also doesn't have a no-gun rule. also, sometimes the Red Hood has a red V-mask, and sometimes Red Hood's design is closer to a red bird design on his chest. ■ Blue bird or blue V-symbol = Dick Grayson (Nightwing) will give you a couple bruises and send you home ■ Yellow bat = probably be worried. □ Red hair (Barbara Gordon (Batgirl → Oracle)), probably going to get the shit kicked out of you, same as No-yellow-circle Batman. □ No hair and no mouth (Cassandra Cain (Batgirl → Orphan)), same rules as red bat, you will probably dead. □ Blonde hair (Stephanie Brown (Robin, Batgirl → Spoiler)), "you can kill that one". which. that is so foul, Jay Morton, what the fuck lol □ "[Generally,] The yellow bat follows the R-rule." ■ The R-rule = "Every single Robin has their own fucking deal." □ If the R is blocky = probably not going to get beat up too bad, unless the kid is very mad, then you might get thrown off a roof. (definitely Jason Todd (Robin → The Red Hood), maybe also Dick Grayson (Robin → Nightwing). i know Jason Todd threw a domestic abuser off a roof and claimed the guy "fell". idk if Dick ever did similar) □ if it is a Spikey R with no yellow circle = Tim Drake (Robin → Red Robin) get hit in the face with a metal pole a few times. same for if it is a Yellow Bird, Tim Drake (Red Robin) will just be hitting you harder □ if the R has just one spike = you will likely die bc Damian Wayne (Robin) has a sword. Red Hood also has a sword, but only sometimes, it's mainly Damian's thing ■ idk why i would ever need this for a fic or something but now i fucking got it just in case, i guess. glad that hypotheical-me won't have to search for this. but yeah, idk if this system is Goonion stuff or a specific villain or just something Gotham-henchmen set up independently, but ill put it here for lack of anywhere better

↳ Bill the Henchman said to Todd His Friend From High School that "it's a really rough career to get into, just to let you know. There's a ton of onboarding processes, super-villains all have their own hiring things, there's the Goonion that you got to sign up for just by obligation."

● Goonion buildings don't allow alcohol in their facilities (Bill took a break in one such building, an unnamed co-worker interupted his break and asked for a drink, and Bill said there was no alcohol here for that reason. idk how the logistics work on if villain buildings (or safehouses) have to be Goonion, if goons prefer to take breaks in a seperate Goonion building in which case does the commute count as part of their break, is this just the overall building similar to a temp agency building in which case why was Bill taking a break in one...? cool detail in theory, very confusing in application to someone as ignorant in temp-work as me). this was mentioned in the Man-Bat skit within 2021 November's compilation

↳ very likely works often with VOSCA (Villainous OSCA, was brought up in Evil LLP's section above, still under the "Associations" heading) ■ also has some sort of connection to Superb Prowers (section is above, still within the "Associations" heading) since their insurance covered Bill's loss of bones

● Works all over the country, sending goons on assignment as needed and where and with what uniforms and etc

● Mask mandates (for COVID) - report to the Goonion for not wearing one. even villain henchmen (esp if their villain is an evil scientist) gotta stay safe ✌️ (Bill the Henchman is esp big on that they protect each other in this way)

● Goons in the union get breaks (as in, like 30 min break, lunch break, etc)

● i assume there is some protection for long-distance assignments? like, Bill the Henchman (Bill's section is below, under the "People" heading) got sent on a 16-hour flight by the Joker to give Bane a pie and another flight to go to Comic-Con. i assume there was financial compensation (both in the sense of a wage increase for the inconvenience, as i know a few jobs get that (many more... don't, but hey, maybe the Goonion got it) because the idea of "your shift hours" also becomes messier though that is more likely if Bill is paid hourly; as well as not paying for your own plane ticket or Comic-con ticket in these examples) and other such work-travel-trips protections (evidentally, there is no protection for how much buffer-time between said trips there has to be, as Bill was sent to Comic-con immediately after the pie but still)

● confirmed members: Bill the Professional Henchman (look at Bill's section in "People" for his co-workers. i don't know which ones are in the union and which ones are out of union. he is very big on the Goonion and helping each other and whatnot, carries merch and everything, biggest advocate, love that for him) ■ Alex (pronouns unknown. was mentioned in Todd the Goonion Rep's skit as a confirmed Goonion member, working as a Bane henchman who is a victim of wage-theft and not-up-to-code company housing via pit/sewers. assumedly is not the same Alex that Ted works with (most of the info on this Ted section's can be found below, under the "People" heading. bc, yeah, for one thing, that Alex lives in a duplex and not in the pits/sewers). Alex wears a beige-white sleeveless torn up t-shirt with a black beanie. will not be getting their own section as this is all i know about Alex)

↳ note: members have ID badges (example of Bill's is in Bill The Henchman's character section)

● confirmed workers: Todd The Goonion Rep (look at that Todd's section down below, under "People". also, technically Todd's job-title is much more formal title of "Traveling Representative for the First Universal Henchmen's Union" but Goonion Rep is snappier); maybe/maybe not confused with Todd Andrews (section is below, under the "People" heading. where he works, Superb Powers, is above, under the "Associations" heading) and/or maybe/maybe not confused with the Todd that is Bill's friend from high school (below, under "People") because i guess all these Todds could be the same guy, but i assume they are not, but you can feel free to hc them as such

↳ Todd The Goonion Rep's outfit is in their section, which is notable here because it could arguably be following the company's dress-code, be their employees' uniform, and so on. assumedly, since members have ID badges, so should Todd The Goonion Rep, thepandaredd just hasn't had the prop yet? fair lmao

↳ not "competition" but definitely confirmed people to not be on the workers' side: Alan (who is a Lexcorp union-buster (lawyer?) person in sunglasses, black suit with black button-up and gold tie. pronouns unknown) ■ "Matches" Malone(?) (which is a DC-canon undercover-alter-ego of Bruce Wayne (Batman) when he wants to try to submerge himself in the crime world)

● their workers can curse on-call (eg. "Oh, yeah, to be perfectly candid: I hear some fucking wild stories.")

● their workers (and also their members? i think?? p sure that is a yes) tend to call villains by their villain-name rather than their civilian-name

● not technically "Goonion info" but is important stuff that have implications about how the place is run (all said in the Todd The Goonion Rep skit): "Riddler, how many times do I need to fucking tell you that: if you are going to use goons as part of your traps, you need to have multiple signed consent forms by both them, a witness, and yourself beforehand?" ■ "As the traveling representative of the Goonion, my job is to travel around the country, talking to various goons and henchmen of both major and minor super-villains, just to make sure they are being both treated fairly and safely within the workplace. Which, honestly, they, uh, they very rarely are." ■ Todd: "So, Alex, it says here that you are a Bane henchmen. However, I can't seem to find any wages listed. So, what does the pay for that look like?" / Alex: "Of course I don't have wages listed, we don't get paid. ...Wait, are we supposed to be getting paid?" / Todd: "Mmhm. I see. I also can't seem to find an address." / Alex: "Oh, I was thinking you were going to ask about that. We all kind of live communally in a pit, or sometimes the sewer." / Todd: "Do you know if this pit is up to code?" / Alex: "I mean, yeah, it's a fine pit. It's probably up to code. We get cable and everything. But, uh, now that you mention it: we do shit in buckets and live in cells, so I'm not particularly sure." / Todd: "Oh, that is definitely a violation of some kind." ■ Todd: "Who the fuck steals both of someone's femurs?" / Bill the Professional Henchmen: "Oh, yeah, you think that's bad? I should tell you about where his kid cut my fucking hand off." / Todd: "His kid did what?!" ■ "Y'know, contrary to popular belief: crime pays very, very well. Like, shit, what do you think, like, 90% of Gotham's economy is? It's just that often times you need to enforce that the workers are actually going to see the fruits of that labor." ■ Todd: "(Groaningly sighs) Hello, Alan." / Alan: "Hello, Todd." / Todd: "Let me guess, you're here on behalf of Lexcorp again to try to break up the union." / Alan: "Now, Todd, you know that we at Lexcorp are not against unions. We simply believe they are detrimental to our bottom-lin— uh, I mean, our overall workforce. And, in fact, I am actually here to join your union. For I think that I too deserve equal safety and pay and rights." / Todd: "Buddy, I work with professional criminals on a daily basis. I can see that you are wearing a wire." / Alan: "Now, how could you say such a... silly... thing? Abort, abort, I need to get out of here." / Todd: "If you just joined, you wouldn't have to piss in bottles anymore!" / Alan: "The official statement of Lexcorp is that we do not, in fact, have to do that!" ■ "If you would like to support your local community of contract criminals, goons, and henchmen: we do have t-shirts available. And, as the motto always says: do bad shit, safely." ■

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★★★ VILLAINS OF (HERO) SUPPORT GROUP (exists for DC and Marvel, created by thepandaredd. i definitely do not need to include this, but i thought it would be funnier if i did)

● there is one for Captain America (p safe to assume it is Steve Rogers' Captain America. Marvel) and one for Superman (p safe to assume it is Clark Kent's Superman. DC) so far. the therapist in charge of either is unnamed, but both have glasses and button-ups (tho the Superman one came in late after getting black-out drunk and taking a nap, and came in with a black t-shirt)

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----------------- people ----------------

★★★ TODD ANDREWS (DC Comics OC)

● unknown pronouns

● works hotline for the insurance company called Superb Prowers (listed above under "Associations"). spoke will Bill The Professional Henchman to help him with his insurance over the phone for his bone-loss claim

● appearance: wears glasses. Wore a white button-up long-sleeve in one video, wore a black t-shirt in one video, wore a black long-sleeve in a third video; every time had black pants(? or at least dark. may be sweatpants, which fair). Plays with a pen a lot (in one video, i think it is a capped pen; in another video it is, i think, a clicky pen which makes Todd slowly and silently clicks at one point while speaking/listening to a call. and i say "plays with" and what i mean is "has it in Todd's hand, between their fingers" a lot. i assumed Todd uses it like a fidget to spin or tap Todd's own chin with, but that is not seen; but Todd slowly + silently clicking the clicky variety is seen. this is too much overexplanation about a fucking pen)

↳ wears a headset with microphone attachment for work. not wireless. sits in a swivel chair with arms at work

● i assume this Todd Andrews is not the same Todd that Bill The Henchman went to high school with. (also, is definitely not the Tood The Goonion Rep) more on why i think that in Todd-(assumedly-not-Andrews)'s (as well as Todd-of-the-Goonion's) section below, is still within the "People" section

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★★★ "THE GUY" (DC Comics OC)

↳ as in "Alfred, call the guy"

● unknown name. confirmed to go by he/him pronouns

● adoption social worker agent, maybe insurance agent? probably, i assume. nothing is confirmed, which is the point

● no further specific details known. i will never make hcs about this character; he is supposed to be a mystery

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★★★ KEVIN (their first Marvel OC! that's rare for thepandaredd! yay!)

● unknown surname, unknown pronouns.

● was in exactly one skit about Marvel, which is unusual for thepandaredd, almost everybody else is a DC Comics OC

● designed the Sentinels' visually (The Sentinel Project are the giant robots who hunt mutants in X-Men). im ngl, i think thepandaredd forgot Bolivar Trask specifically already exists lol but maybe not, as thepandaredd did remember to include the headline "Trask Industries (mid 60s)" in the tiktok. hey! maybe Trask did the idea and/or engineering and hired Kevin as an artist, or maybe Trask pitched the idea after Kevin sold him on it and it's like a "Steve Jobs and all the unnamed workers who came up with the iPhone ideas" scenario (Kevin did at one point say "The President loved it", so Bolivar Trask could be President, sure), idk, i only know of Trask vaguely from the 90s "X-Men: The Animated Series" show i watched as a toddler and from the "X-Men: Days of Future Past" movie i watched a decade ago in theaters, maybe i'm the one forgetting shit, i dont pay attention to what is the generally accepted Bolivar Trask lore bc i dont care about the character, personally. Peter Dinklage is cool tho

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★★★ BILL (THE PROFESSIONAL HENCHMAN) (DC Comics OC)

info that is unknown bc of The Reboot Agent stuff (the video of which i am only linking once and it is here) is [[[ bracketed ]]] already but i will also make it [[[ green ]]] inside the brackets for your guys' convenience

● he/him, unknown surname. (hc full name: William "Bill" Bail. i have a whole scene planned for Bill attempting to be vulnerable by giving an OC of mine his surname as a sign of trust, as he doesn't do that as a way of protecting his relatives/identity from the villains that employ him, followed by my OC fully not believing his surname is real and busting Bill's chops about it. it works for my needs, and i personally dont agree with the handful of fans i see that hc his surname should be Hench or Henchman though i do love their energy, that is a v funny joke. i just wanted a different variety of a jokey surname. uh, but, yeah! Bail is a real surname, and the surname itself is actually a diminutive of "bailiff". as in the job. which a bailiff is a officer of the court who keeps order and "looks after prisoners" (ie. "A bailiff is a manager, overseer or custodian – a legal officer to whom some degree of authority or jurisdiction is given. Bailiffs are of various kinds and their offices and duties vary greatly.") which is all a vast simplification of bailiffs but i think it is a cute simplification for Bill's character specifically)

● confirmed to have worked runs with Joker, Two-Face, Black Mask, Penguin, Mr Freeze, Riddler (and also maybe Lex Luthor? it is implied due to how much Bill knows about Lexcorp working conditions, and also the Jimmy Olsen stuff as mentioned below)

↳ idk if this is still accurate post-reboot [[[ an unnamed co-worker worked at Cobra Commander (Cobra Headquarters in Springfield) earlier that week, is one of the places the Goonion sends people. Bill maybe has, maybe has not been there? idk, he seemed to know about how to take the helmet off but maybe Bill just saw the latch. hard to tell when the whole dialogue is "There's a latch" when he's already looking at the helmet. i assume no, Bill has not worked for Cobra, because he said "there's a latch" so late in the skit and also from what he said "Wait, so that's another villain's henchman?! That's even worse!" so he didn't know the uniform(?) which implies he didn't work there (which is odd bc he also said "Yes, because the Cobra Commander helmet is so much more reasonable to just have in your car?! Why do you even have that?!" so he recognized it. i guess he just thought it was cosplay instead of another henchman uniform, idk). you could make an argument either way, i guess, hc away lol ]]]

↳ answers phonecalls as "You got Bill."

↳ texts his bosses stuff like "On it, boss."/"Yes, sir. You got it, boss."/"On my way. Will do, boss."/"Yes, sir. On it, boss."/"Okay, boss. Be back soon." even though he'd rather yell (this is mainly @Joker)

↳ (this happened post-reboot) knows Jimmy Olsen well enough that Jimmy recognizes him on sight alone; meaning he has very fucking likely also worked for Metropolis villains (such as but not limited to Lex Luthor) and has faced Superman often

● appearance: generally always wears a black ball-cap hat (didn't use to way back but it is a thing by now), a necklace tucked into his shirt (i cant tell what his necklace is. is it a sparkplug necklace? → edit: NOPE. it's from 2022 January's PO Box Unboxing, it's "Skele-Gro: Bone Regenerator". it's a tube of amber-yellow liquid, with a pale yellow label, on a silver chain, with a silver skull-and-crossbones charm). he dresses in all black most of the time. generally wears t-shirts or long-sleeves, usually of the monochromatic variety (almost always a gray/black plain shirt with no graphic, except for in "How the Bat Boy treat henchmen" skit where he wore a few different shirts, and the skit with him and the 16 hour flight stuff where he wore thepandaredd's Lord Deathman merch shirt) (the red-gray henley Bill wore in his first ever tiktok appearance as the first goon ever beat up by a Robin? is generally ignored, hence the strike-through here). and sometimes wears a black jacket (which, generally, is a black denim jacket). does possess Goonion merch.

↳ optional-to-read waffling about the Skele-grow necklace: further confirmation of this indeed being necklace that Bill wears is in this 2022 July compilation, where Bill forgot to tuck his necklace into his shirt and you can see the amber-gold Skele-Grow bottle and the teeny skull-and-crossbones charm. more importantly, you can also see it in the September 2022 compilation, which is the one that features Bill getting shot by Alfred Pennyworth which then leads him into the reboot event in April 2023 compilation where he doesn't have a necklace? but that could be just a prop error (either in the sense "it is there, it just accidentally was hidden from the camera by being tucked into the shirt and whatnot" or in the sense that "it was forgotten on accident but was meant to be there"). plus the Instagram post mentioned a few bullet points down says Bill still has a necklace. i just dont know if it is the same one or not. i, personally, see the necklace as an extension or representation of Bill's connection with his audience and creator, and therefore connected to his Fourth Wall Breaks and everything Madoka-Magic-y i mention in a later bullet-point within Bill's section. so i will be very interested to see if this necklace is lost or not (to simplify his rebooted form additionally in the sense of less bone loss, maybe even no more Fourth Wall breaks? idk, maybe. the Agent Of The Reboot was Fourth Wall breaking a lot and Bill was confused, maybe it was out of overwhelmed panic but all those references went over Bill's head. there wasn't any "You can see them too?!" or anything. but who knows! could just be a prop error. maybe when the instagram post listed in lower bullet-point within this section talked about "a necklace always tucked into his shirt", it about the Skele-grow necklace, maybe it was about a wholly new necklace, whooo knowwwss ...i personally would like to know tho, so i do hope thepandaredd does another untucked-necklace Bill video so i can see if it Bill is still wearing a Skele-grow necklace or is it a new necklace)

↳ mid-reboot/post-reboot version has a white streak in his hair, confirmed in the tiktok Agent Reboot video itself idk the video's title

↳ in the Agent Reboot video, Bill also freaks out about how his hat has changed. which the hat he wore when Alfred Pennyworth shot him for breaking in to get Lord Deathman was a plain, all black baseball cap. and mid-reboot freak-out looks like an identically plain, all black baseball cap (to me, anyway). maybe that was a gag that went over my head. maybe it was a sentiment about how well-cared for Bill's things are that he would notice someone switching out his hat for an identical one like it. idk, to my inexperienced eye, it looks like the same hat lol

↳ optional aspect of appearance: leg-braces as "femur transplants are not fool-proof".

↳ note: most of this info comes from thepandaredd's 25 February 2024 instagram post (+ the leg-braces bit was posted by thepandaredd in that post's comment section) unless otherwise stated

↳ also, in the June 2022 compilation there is a PO Box Unboxing, an unnamed fan gave Bill his own Goonion badge. so that is also part of Bill's props assumedly. unlike most of the other badges we have seen in thepandaredd (vertical), the Goonion badge is the only horizontal one which makes me specifically happy bc i prefer horizontal badges. anyway. the info on it, i cannot read because it is too pixelated even at youtube's highest resolution at 2160p, alas. but thepandaredd reads out some of its info says the following: "His height has a little asterisk next to it saying his height was 6'3" before his femurs removed and now he is back to 6'1". Which is, oh my god, I love that. Also, his hair is just listed as 'Yes' and his eyes are listed as 'Currently two'; this is, this is fucking genius." so. there is that lmao i love the badge

● Injuries sustained:

↳ idk how much of this is still accurate post-reboot [[[ lost his bones before (eg. all the bones in his legs more than once. was covered by the Goonion tho. said bones are kept in a box on a bookshelf openly labeled "Spare Bones" apparently as uncovered when Bill broke into Wayne Manor to free Lord Deathman, though it is unconfirmed if Bill took any of the bones he had found and how many in the box were his or if the box was labeled that as a joke but actually contained something else). lost his femur x2 in one year, had to go in surgery both times. shot in both kneecaps by Red Hood. was put on fire "back in the early days" by Red Hood. generally been beat up by the Batfam weapons (eg. Tim Drake's bo-staff to Bill's legs). has been dropped off a roof by Batman (breaks legs, cops come get you). ]]] okay, instagram post by thepandaredd in 25 February 2024 confirms the femur replacements happened, as an optional thing Bill can wear is leg-braces since "femur transplants aren't fool-proof"

↳ idk if this is still true bc reboot [[[ note for age: Bill was The First Goon to ever get beat up by a 10 year-old Robin (assumedly Dick Grayson). i wouldnt be surprised if this was noncanonical because then it means Bill is a minimum of 6+, 8+ years older than 10 year-old Dick Grayson (Nightwing) (therefore making Bill 16, 18 years old when he was beat up, at minimum)? more likely is considered "an adult" in comparison to said Robin's then-age, so i'd go higher than 8 years older than a 10 year-old. idk how old Bill canonically is, but if it differs with that information then this would be noncanonical ]]] [[[ (also beat said Robin (again, safe to assume Dick Grayson) in second meeting, and Batman then beat Bill the fuck up and "did unspeakable things to my bones" so assumedly that was the first time Bill got his bones stolen) ]]]

↳ [[[ "Alfred, Get The Guy" and Other Probably-Non-Canonical Skits: has been "turned off" (stopped fucking existing for a sec). i seriously doubt that was ever canon for Bill, but the reboot happened so i assume the reboot doubly-so kills this ]]]

↳ idk if this counts bc reboot [[[ chronic issue: lost ability to feel temperature bc of fire (a Robin set him on fire? unclear which one, implied lots of time has passed so unlikely to be Damian Wayne) ]]]

↳ also a chronic issue: it's implied in one of the Lord Deathman videos (when Bill is going to break out Lord Deathman from the Wayne Manor as per Joker's request. the following occurs right before Bill texts the Joker) that Bill has tinnitus. i assume that is still true post-reboot because it is a small enough chronic injury, it makes sense, sure. but yeah, we hear the "ears ringing" sound during a scene where Bill has laid down to rest and relax before he looks at his phone

↳ can (sometimes? always? idk) speak Fourth Wall, likely because of a side-effect of how many times he has been hit in the head. i assume this still works in spite of the reboot, since Bill was able to, not only talk to the Reboot Agent, but very importantly: have the ability to have woken up mid-reboot. both of those things are likely related to this Fourth Wall Breaking ability. however, also, the Agent kept saying Fourth Wall breaks and Bill did not have a "You can see them too?!" reaction, but rather a very confused and overwhelmed panic reaction where he did not seem to get the references. so maybe he has now lost the ability. i have no idea

↳ my hc add-on as to why Bill was enabled to wake up mid-reboot: do you remember seeing just all of "Madoka Magica"? spoilers for that incoming (or you at least have seen Danny Motta's reaction series to it on youtube, assuming if you're like me and that show has triggers you don't want to risk potentially triggering yourself by watching the show but. like. you do want to know the events, impact, and pop-culture references) where Homura's love for Madoka to keep jumping into timelines to try to save her is singularly what ends up making Madoka the chosen one? because she was loved to that point? that even the universe took notice of her and claimed her as its prodigal child, because the universe reflects what we (in this cause: Homura specifically) puts into it? yeah, i hc that's Bill and this audience. that he just was likely some nameless goon, like a lot of thepandaredd OCs, but because fans (and thepandaredd) loved Bill so much, they took this throwaway skit character mid-overall-creation and gave Bill life where life was intended for him to be miscellaneous. hell, Bill even wears a Skele-Gro necklace from a fan in a PO Box Unboxing video that thepandaredd did a short skit mid-PO-Box-video of Bill receiving (at least i assume that is what he is wearing, he does keep it under his shirt). Bill became important enough to even be rebooted, much less wake up mid-reboot, because of how much he is loved. it's arguably why he has some on/off low-level Fourth Wall breaks too (we don't see that consistently be a thing for other goons). maybe im getting a little too Grant Morrison's "Animal Man" or, hell, even just fucking "The Velveteen Rabbit" by Margery Williams. because Bill's plot is still overall (to steal a line from Jo O'Connor's "Mind Blind"* game tag-line:) "A Story Where You Are NOT The Chosen One!" in a world of Supermans and billionaires and other lucky and not-so-lucky bastards. but still. the love is there, and it is important; and maybe it doesn't make Bill's life better, but it matters that it is still there. but i digress [ *: and bc i fucking love that game, here is the link to the free demo version of Mind Blind. go to Jo's patreon if you want more after the demo]

● confirmed co-workers: idk bc reboot [[[ Scott (unknown pronouns. was beat up by Batman while Bill was "the first goon to be beat up by Robin"). that's all that is known about Scott, so Scott does not have an individual section. also, we never saw Scott, so we have no idea what Scott looks like ]]] ■ [[[ Ted (he/him pronouns. was name-dropped in "how the Bat Boys treat henchman" video. was thrown out of a 73-odd story building window by Man-Bat; is dead. that's all the info i have on Ted, so i won't give Ted his own OC section. we also have no idea what this Ted looks like, we never saw this Ted on-screen. the skit featuring him is in the November 2021 compilation) (edit: possibly/arguably more about Ted, post-reboot, is below. maybe could be same Ted character, maybe could be a totally different Ted. idk. but this Ted has their own section) ]]] ■ [[[ John (he/him pronouns. was probably never canon. but he was mentioned alongside Bill in a skit about an old goon complaining about younger people calling Terry by Batman in "Batman Beyond", where John was a goon that Batman smiled at and John is "still at Arkham to this day, he never recovered from that"). that's all that is known about John so no an individual section. also, we never saw John either so there are no notes about that either ]]] + a bunch of unnamed co-worker goons lol

● idk bc reboot [[[ had jury duty with Bruce Wayne. is meant to imply he was present for (and that this is based off of) the famous "Bruce admits he is Batman because of Jury Duty and everyone in the courtroom laughs" comic. said courtcase was about the unnamed goon Bill and Batman briefly interacted with that got shot in the crotch because said goon insisted on keeping a gun under their waistband ]]]

● calls his work "independent contractor" and "this freelance thing, working where I can" // when not hiding his job, has called himself a "hench for hire"

● lives at "Company housing" // does indeed live in Gotham, is occasionally shipped on assignment outside of Gotham by the Goonion per aforementioned implications (plus, explicitly has been sent out by his bosses. namely Joker, who once had Bill go on a 16 hour flight to send Bane a pie in-person that assumedly had a bomb in it as well as Joker having assigned Bill to attend Comic-con. (which was post-reboot, as a fun fact, so it definitely happened). but yeah, i assume the habit happens outside of that specific event in terms of both the Joker sending Bill out long-distances as well as other villains also sending him out to far-off places. just. for more grounded reasons than the Joker lol)

● idk bc reboot [[[ knows a Todd from high school (wore a wire for the G.C.P.D., pretended to be into henching), tho Todd never graduated. nonetheless, Todd does have a section below ]]] 

● idk if this counts bc reboot [[[ tried to become a cop (G.C.P.D.) with a fake mustache, under tha name "Will. Just Will", even though 60% of Gotham cops are dirty + the good ones (eg Commissioner Gordon) knew Joker had only just broken out of jail and assembled a crew. Comissioner Gordon has personally arrested Bill over 50 times, he immediately knew it was Bill ]]]

● idk bc reboot [[[ was shown where the Bat Cave was by Cassandra when she made him help her dispose of Lord Deathman's corpse Joker made bc she had "tiny hands". he used this information to later free Lord Deathman. i would bet Bill knowing this info did not survive the reboot but who knows ]]]

● Bill chooses to work for villains instead of Wayne Industries because he sees billionaire Bruce Wayne as a villain too; and, between the two, he'd rather work with the villain with style (aka: Batman villains). this admission technically happened pre-reboot but i assume it is still his opinion

● idk bc reboot but i assume yes, still true, but just in case [[[ Bill is anti-smoking. does not seem to like it even if it's people smoking around him, will get all Disappointed Yet Sassy on other goons smoking. i assume this goes for cigarettes, cigars, joints etc; but the skit only implied cigarettes ]]]

● i assume this still counts in spite of the reboot, but idk, ill make it green anyway just in case [[[ Bill doesn't have kids. and assumedly from the following dialogue line, he doesn't ever want kids. there is an implication that he could have had kids, and idk if that was an implication as in (1) a significant other and him had a talk and likely mutually agreed to an abortion, (2) he and a significant other broke up because they wanted kids and he did not (and assumedly said partner had kids p soon afterwards with, like, their very next partner or so, hence why there would be a "could have been me" sentiment), (3) Bill had the oppurtunity to take a kid/some kids in as their guardian but chose not to (eg. as a step-parent, as in kinship care or kinship adoption, as a foster care or a foster child wanting to become Bill's kid, or maybe Bill got close with a kid in a non-foster setting and said kid wanted Bill to foster them/to be their legal guardian, idk), or (4) Bill almost donated to a sperm bank but decided not (or maybe he did donate and checked off the "never contact me" box and considers that still "not having kids". i personally think "no" to this bc i find the sperm bank system in the USA really corruptable and un-regulated, and i don't like that sperm-donor-kids don't have access to their sperm donor's medical records even in cases of medical emergencies/genetic disabilities or chronic illnesses that skipped the sperm donor (or that the sperm donor didn't realize they had, since so much of the sperm donation process is the fucking honor system and sometimes people get late diagnosed and sometimes certain genes activate later in life for a random reason) but did not skip the sperm-donor-kid/etc). in the Lord Deathman skit where Bill and Cassandra Cain (Oracle) bag up Lord Deathman. after she asks him for help carrying the bags, he grumbles "You have got to be fucking kidding me. You are the exact reason why I didn't have kids." before saying "I'll grab my coat!" with frustration. and, yes, all of this theorizing is because the verb-usage "didn't", as in "I could have had kids but I did not" (rather than using a line like "You're the reason I never want kids", where the diction would not have backstory implications), is very interesting to me lmao ]]]

↳ i personally have the hc that, as a connection of Bill's Fourth Wall breaks, similar to how the Joker knows he is in a comic and that the people he kills do not matter ("They're extras" to quote Bakugou), Bill knows he is in a comic and doesn't see much point in having kids. i also personally tie this in with his "Wayne Industries/Bruce Wayne is also a villain" belief in the sense that Bill either still has memories or else has unconscious premonitions from having been a nameless background character in "Bruce Wayne reconstruction stories that show how unstable Bruce/Batman is as a hero" comic stories. like. what is the point of having kids in that kind of enviroment where they could be Superman's "The Man Who Has Everything"-ified and you get rebooted and forced to forget/"forget" your own kids? then the verb usage of "didn't" could be "why I didn't have kids in this timeline". maybe he remembers or has vague premonitions abiut being a dad before (and maybe Bill didn't like being a dad? idk). i think it brings a new touch to his exhaustion in (the Lord Deathman video when Alfred Pennyworth shot him which featured) that scene of him having tinnitus, where he is just tired and sad and needs a break from all this

● i assume this still counts in spite of the reboot, but idk, ill make it green anyway just in case [[[ Bill can read ASL (American Sign Language), we know bc Cassandra Cain (Oracle. thepandaredd plays Cassandra as nonverbal) signed to him in the Lord Deathman skit where they bag up Lord Deathman and she makes him carry the bags because she signs to him "Help me. Tiny hands." ]]]

● i like what i said about Bill, comparing him to Mitchell Mayo in Mitchell Mayo (Condiment King)'s section below (bc i do kind of see thepandaredd's re-imagining of Mitchell as an OC. section is below, still under "People"), so i'm taking the hc-analysis and copy-pasting it here: (i kind of like the hc i have of Mitchell Mayo still being in the Goonion, but is a polar opposite to Bill The Henchman. doesn't connect with new goons or really guide them, Bill is kind of implied to be a bit of a mentor/big brother considering a few goons are excited to show him what they did (eg. the Jimmy Olsen kidnapping skit goon) or when he mother-hens the goon-that-once-worked-at-Cobra-HQ or the goon-with-a-gun-in-waistband, and also the hypothetical-"Batman Beyond"-elder-goon even says "Bless his soul" in talking about Bill. compare that with how Butch Moreti treats Mitchell Mayo. admittingly, Butch was acting under frustrating circumstances, but still. i think Mitchell Mayo is just a "big goon in a small pond" who is seasoned at his goon-work as a helluva scary pseudo-mercenary (one even civillians can immediately recognize), whereas Bill is a seasoned goon that isn't a renowned merc but is still really good at his job and also blends in easy with crowds (bc nobody knows who he is). like. Mitchell Mayo is kind of the asshole "truly evil" guy that Bill could have been, y'know?)

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[[[ ★★★ TODD ??? ]]] (this one is Bill's high school classmate. DC Comics OC)

idk if this Todd exists because of the whole reboot thing (look at Bill The Henchman section under "People" + The Agent of the Reboot section under "Associations"), but sure

● unknown pronouns. unknown surname (hc full name: (bc i don't think he is Todd Andrews) my headcanon for Todd's surname is Turk. if you go to TV Tropes' page on "The Informant" trope, under the "Comic Books" section, you will read about a brief paragraph Marvel character named Turk who was an informant for Marvel vigilantees. and it's obvious in said paragraph why Marvel doesn't use him anymore lmao rip poor Turk to better differentiate this Todd from Todd Andrews, i also hc that Todd is a nickname for "Theodore" so it is slightly easier on my brain to differntiate all these "Todd"s lmao according to BehindTheName, "Theodore" just means "gift of god" which is sweet yet nonspecific. and its sister-site, Surname.BehindTheName,com said the surname "Turk" meant exactly what is on the tin, it means "Turk". fair. but, yeah, so my hc for this character's full name is Theodore "Todd" Turk. neato, alliteration, yay lmao)

● appearance: wore a black crewneck t-shirt and a wire for the G.C.P.D. also, has recieved a free Goonion black t-shirt from Bill to implement possibly into Todd's wardrobe

↳ as a bonus, the skit this Todd was in featured an G.C.P.D. Dispatch officer of an unknown name and unknown pronouns that wore glasses and a black crewneck t-shirt, and sat a a computer. there you go for anybody who wanted to ensure continuity with Todd and this unnamed G.C.P.D. connection

● idk if this still counts bc reboot [[[ was Bill The Henchman's classmate in high school. tho Todd never graduated high school ]]] more about Bill is above, albeit still under the "People" section

● idk if this still counts bc reboot [[[ wore a wire for the G.C.P.D., pretended to be looking into henching. idk if that means Todd works for the G.C.P.D. and was briefly undercover for this, or if Todd was asked to take a wire for a bit (by the G.C.P.D.) as a civillian. regardless, got a Goonion t-shirt from Bill ]]]

● assumedly not the Todd Andrews from Superb Powers (Todd Andrews' section is somewhere above, under "People". the Superb Powers is above even that, under "Associations") or Todd The Goonion Rep (said Todd is below, still within the "People" section. the Goonion is above, under "Associations") as this Todd does not wear glasses and i think you need to have finished high school to be an accountant? maybe they are the same and Todd got a GED after, i have no idea, hc to your heart's extent, maybe Todd Andrews' glasses are just for blue-light, maybe Todd the Goonion Rep wears fake glasses, or maybe this Todd wears contacts who knows

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★★★ TODD (this one is the Goonion rep. DC Comics OC)

↳ technically, i have been calling this Todd by the wrong title kind of this whole time but i had to, i had to do it for the communicative clarity of consistency. because Todd's actual title is only colloquially "a Goonion Rep." as Todd's actual title is "Traveling Representative for the First Universal Henchman's Union". again, this is usually shortened colloquially to "Goonion Rep" but you get it, you get why i didn't call him that every time in the past, Goonion Rep is snappier and there's getting to quickly be too many Todds lmao

● unknown surname. unknown pronouns. (hc full name: Thaddeus "Todd" Malloy. and, with that, i have p much run out of things "Todd" can be short for. luckily, Thaddeus kind of fits a union rep, as BehindTheName.com says it likely derived from the meaning "heart". that's cute. and esp for a Goonion rep, as BehindTheName also says "In the Gospel of Matthew, Thaddaeus is listed as one of the twelve apostles, though elsewhere in the New Testament his name is omitted and Jude's [aka another form of Judas' name, apparently] appears instead. It is likely that the two names refer to the same person". and im not nor have i ever been a Christian but goons and Judas assumedly fit together? yeah? i hope? anyway, i picked the surname Malloy because of the 1954 movie "On The Waterfront" which is about unions, mobs, and an ex-prize-fighter named Teddy Malloy. you can see the connection. i haven't seen it in so many years, i apologize if it is a bad movie to connect to, the plot-summary i read seemed fine enough and my chronic memory loss-riddled ass remembers if fondly enough even tho i was like... seven lol. but, i digress. i should also note that according to Surname.BehindTheName.com Malloy also has connections to both "noble, proud leader" and "faithful servant". huh! even more fitting!)

● appearance: wears glasses. wears a white button-up and a black tie

● works at The First Universal Henchman's Union, aka The Goonion (more on that organization above, under the "Associations" section)

● this is p safe to assume not the Todd Andrews from Superb Powers (Todd Andrews' section is somewhere above, under "People". the Superb Powers section is above even that, under the "Associations" heading) or the Todd That is Bill's High School Friend (said Todd is above, though still within the "People" section. the Goonion is above even that too, under "Associations"). i explained in Todd That Is Bill's High School Friend's section some of why they might be different, might be the same, it's all up the hc, but im p confident they are all different characters all given the forename Todd, okay? okay lmao

● (@/thepandaredd, if you ever read this: i know you love Jason Todd, Jason is also my favorite in the Batfam (after Alfred, obviously, but you get it), and you have this many different Todd OCs is so fucking funny but also im begging you for other names in-between my laughs, please no more Todds lmao) [/tone clarity: this is me complaining as a bit. do what you want, it's your tiktok and your OCs. im just joshing. ill be fine if you do more Todds. much love to you and yours ♡]

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★★★ DR. AARON MICHAELS (DC Comics OC)

● he/him pronouns

● Therapist at Akrham Asylum

↳ replacing an assumedly male (had he/him pronouns if nothing else) therapist that Joker seduced, much like the Joker also had done with Harley Quinn; they found out because the guy had downloaded videos on his desktop that were explict and graohic about clowns. he was fired and Dr. Aaron Michaels was hired

● calls patients by their civillian names (important contrast with Dr. Morton below, is also under the "People" section)

● appearance: wears glasses. in his first video, Dr. Aaron Michaels wore a red long-sleeve button-up with a gray vest and matching gray pants. in Dr. Aaron Michael's second and third video, he wore a red long-sleeve button-up with a gray wool suit jacket. generally has folders/binders/notes, with said folder/binder being darkly colored (black? gray? very dark blue? i cant tell). also has an Arkham ID badge (the card is verticle as a fun fact) that he wears on his suit jacket's breast pocket

● has to make a semi-regular video log ("to mak[e] sure I don't have any 'impure thoughts about the inmates'" which he doesn't like that wording for his patients but you pick and choose your battles)

● Works down the hall from Dr. Morton (is below, is also under the "People" section)

● Transferred from Seattle (doesn't have prior knowledge of patients, instead sits down with them totally blind and whatnot). for those unaware, that is in Washington, USA

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★★★ DR. MORTON (DC Comics OC)

● he/him. Unknown forename (i know in his first video that Dr. Morton showed his Arkham badge to camera but i cannot read it so idk if it said his forename. but i like being a nerd about names+meanings; so, despite the fact that it is quite likely he does have a first name already, because it is illegible to me, im giving him a hc forename: very tempting to jokingly pick "Jay" because thepandaredd is Jay Morton, but that's low-hanging fruit, so i digress my pick is Victor, after Victor Frankenstein of "Frankenstein" fame. tho, like, Victor barely counts as a doctor, he's more of a hack insisting he counts, but he practices alchemy which even his classmates say is super-outdated and not a real science. im getting off track. my "BUT"-point here is that i associate them together because Victor Frankenstein sees the Creature, arguably his own son (i def see the Creature as his son, Victor literally created the Creature, but i digress) but is definitely a patient of his if nothing else, as a monster immediately upon the uncanny-valley-motherfucker daring to actually move &&& Dr Morton calls his patients exclusively by their villain-names so far as of 2024 March, implying he does see his patients as monstrous due to their actions or at least sees their villain identities as superseding their original civillian names, which is a really cool contrasting point between him and Dr. Aaron Michaels. i wonder if that's something they argue about but are still friends in spite of, if that sticking point of difference stops them from being friends, etc)

● Level 2 Medical Officer at Arkham Asylum. also called "A physician", is specifically a "General Care physician for all the supervillians housed at the asylum"

↳ 8 years medical school, minor is psychology

● Calls patients by their villain names (important contrast with Dr. Aaron Michaels, above, still under the "People" section. i have analysis about this character choice in my "hc for Dr Morton's forename" right up a few points)

● appearance: he wears glasses. in his first video, Dr. Morton wore red scrubs (or what i assume are supposed to be scrubs? idk, im not a scrubs expert) with a black longer-sleeved shirt underneath and black pants. Dr. Morton also wears what i assume is a scrub-cap, and it is black with skull-and-crossbones on it. in his second video, Dr. Morton wore a white labcoat on top of his scrubs, but otherwise dressed the same. also, he has an Arkham ID badge (fun fact: the card is vertical) that he wore as a lanyard around his neck

↳ hc: i think Dr. Morton stops wearing his ID around his neck. it's a common enough thing that patients will attempt to strangle their doctors in general clinics (much less around dangerously violent patients, like in Arkham Asylum) that doctors (1) dont wear stethoscopes around their neck anymore as a rule, or anything around their neck that could be used to choke them; (2) dont generally wear lanyards and, if they do, it is a break-away lanyard; and (3) instead of lanyards will wear a badge-holder-clip (often a retractable one for convenience) on their top somewhere (ive seen it clipped on their scrub-shirt's neck, their shirt breast pocket, and the hem of the shirt. i once saw it on the hem of their sleeve. i do not know if there is protocol about this beyond "above the waist", this is just based on observations and none of the odder ones are recent. i usually see breast pocket the most). which means someone probably tried to choke out Dr. Morton, and idk who would be the most likely candidate, but regardless it probably doesn't help Dr. Morton see his patients positively enough to use their civillian-names over their villain-names

↳ another hc: which, like. speaking of, i dont think Dr. Morton using villain-names over character-names is bad. it is part of the patients identity and probably the part they recognize the most (since v rarely are any remorseful for their actions). it shows Dr. Morton sees them for their (current) actions, rather than seeing them for their humanity out of his own perception of the world. saying that, i still disagree with the decision for a multitude of reasons, but it's a cool character detail and i wont go off in a tangent about this, this is already enough lol

● Works down the hall from Dr. Aaron Michaels (whose section is above, still under the "People" section)

● Listed treatments:

↳ Eyedrops many times a week for Two-Face's eye to not be a raisin

↳ Splinting Penguin's nose

↳ Has never seen Clayface shit

↳ Repairing "the grill" of Joker

↳ Trying to convince the Joker that wiping his ass does not, and can not, make the Joker gay (suspects the Joker is attracted Batman nonetheless)

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★★★ BUTCH MORETI (DC Comics OC)

technically, this character kind of doesn't exist. as the character was just in a draft version of the "Make Condiment King Scary" tiktok, and not in the finalized video. but i am ignoring that

↳ idk if "Butch" was the character's forename or nickname, but i assume it is the forename (but you can hc it as a nickname if you want)

● Pronouns unknown

● Worked with Mitchell Mayo (Condiment King, canon character but re-imagined rendition is below, still listed under "People" section) died because of Mitchell due to Mitchel poisoning a dollop of ketchup (that Butch ate with fries from Big Belly Burger, one of Butch's favorite places to eat)

↳ died in a safe-house, after ripping off Falconé

↳ Mitchell Mayo was sent by Falconé to kill Moreti -- "Falconé sends his regards, Butch"

● appearance: was dressed in all black, with a black leather jacket (no lapel, had fake-motorcycle-padding-shoulder-pockets if you squint. this in contrast to Mitchell Mayo (Condiment King)'s leather jacket which did have a lapel), with a black t-shirt, black pants, etc.

● Butch was irritable (makes sense, after ripping off Falconé and finding someone in the safehouse) and waved a gun around for intimidation

● i hc both Butch Moreti and Mitchell Mayo (Condiment King) were/are Goonion members and co-workers of Bill The Henchman (more on Bill above, still under the "People" section). i love Mitchell Mayo (Condiment King) as what thepandaredd wrote him as now, i refuse to see him any other way after the "Make Condiment King Scary" video lol ■ more on thepandaredd's re-imagining of Mitchell Mayo (The Condiment King) below, still under the "People" section

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★★★ MITCHELL MAYO (CONDIMENT KING) (DC Comics)

technically, shouldn't be here bc he is a canon DC comics character already. but i like thepandaredd's re-imagining enough to have made notes and consider him a bit of an OC of panda's

● assumed, he/him pronouns due to canon and masculine self-references (eg. a guy, a man, King, etc)

● hates the title "Condiment King", does not like to be called that and will tell you. the press gave it to him after a murder Mitchell comitted (more below under "Confirmed murders")

↳ "So patronizing. Like, I'm trying to make some some grand-standing with what I do, I'm not. I'm not."

↳ "Everybody in Gotham has got a gimmick."

↳ "See, my problem isn't with the name itself. It's with what the insult that is implied. People think that what I do is silly. But I'm gonna ask you something. If the ketchup was too tangy, would you stop eating it? Or if your hot wings tingled your throat in a way you didn't expect, would you all of a sudden stop? See, the thing is, apart from taking a shit: eating is when people are at their most vulnerable. I ask you: do you know what poison tastes like? Are you sure?"

● appearance: wears a green beanie with a pompom (reference to character's pickle hat in comics. (fun behind-the-scenes fact: the hat in question in the tiktok is a backwards "Friends" beanie. Mitchell's is assumedly not that. but it is what thepandaredd could find at the time)). wears all black otherwise, including a black leather jacket (with a lapel), a black t-shirt, black pants, etc (note: when killing the unnamed guy a few bullet points below, was wearing a "new sky blue suit" that got stains all over it from fighting said guy in a kitchen and getting tossed around. assumedly had to throw it away after, but who knows, maybe it got cleaned)

↳ very recognizable. Ted (below, still under "People" section) recognized Mitchell Mayo on sight, despite being a Gotham transplant who'd only been there for three months

● personality is generally laid-back? a bit of an "under the surface" type of control-freak? is kind of quiet, lets people make assumptions that benefit Mitchell Mayo. keeps calm while others fly off the handle. will get a bit loud and growly when angry, letting it slip for half a phrase or so, before laughing it off and continuing like he isn't annoyed/pissed off. smiles and laughs creepily at the idea of murdering people; no guilt, no shame, enjoys it. very much recommend watching both the draft and final versions of "Make Condiment King Scary" that thepandaredd made

● likes to eat french fries (in the draft version of "Make Condiment King Scary", Mitchell eats the fries without ketchup as said ketchup is poisoned for Butch Moreti to eat. in this version, the fries are from Big Belly Burger ■ in the final version of the video, Mitchell does eat his fries with ketchup) ■ according to Ted's second "Living in Gotham" video (Ted's section is below, still under the "People" header. Ted called Mitchell Mayo exclusively by "the Condiment King" which i assume did not help Ted's case), Mitchell got so mad at Ted for dissing the Bat Burger (+Joker Fries) that Ted had to hide in the bathroom of an abandoned building as Mitchell Mayo pounded on the bathroom door saying, "I know you're in there! I know you're in there! Open the door!". so i assume the Bat Burger is Mitchell Mayo's favorite and that he is the "No, you misunderstand. I'm not willing to die on this hill, I'm willing to kill you on it." type in regards to food-opinions

● drinks A&W rootbeer? i think?? idk what that can is of otherwise (in final version of "Make Condiment King Scary")

● worked with Falconé as "a goon" ("another grunt off the street"; kind of implies Goonion likely wasn't a thing yet back then? but who knows, Goonion doesn't seem relatively new, so Mitchell Mayo probably was a member when he started. edit: nah, according to the Goonion merch, it was "established 2000", so yeah, it is relatively new, nvm) ("Hands up, fucker, Falconé sends his regards"), implied to not being doing that anymore

↳ when with Butch Moerti (section above, still under "People"), is implied to still be peers. so still henchmen. Butch patronizes Mitchell, sees Mitchell as below Butch, and Mitchell allows Butch to underestimate him as it benefits Mitchell in the end

↳ i hc both Butch Moreti and Mitchell Mayo (Condiment King) were/are Goonion members and co-workers of Bill The Henchman (more on Bill above, still under the "People" section). i love Mitchell Mayo (Condiment King) as what thepandaredd wrote him as now, i refuse to see him any other way after the "Make Condiment King Scary" video lol

↳ implied to be a mercenary now? idk if this version is a supervillain (i kind of like the hc i have of Mitchell Mayo still being in the Goonion, but is a polar opposite to Bill The Henchman. doesn't connect with new goons or really guide them, Bill is kind of implied to be a bit of a mentor/big brother considering a few goons are excited to show him what they did (eg. the Jimmy Olsen kidnapping skit goon) or when he mother-hens the goon-that-once-worked-at-Cobra-HQ or the goon-with-a-gun-in-waistband, and also the hypothetical-"Batman Beyond"-elder-goon even says "Bless his soul" in talking about Bill. compare that with how Butch Moreti treats Mitchell Mayo. admittingly, Butch was acting under frustrating circumstances, but still. i think Mitchell Mayo is just a "big goon in a small pond" who is seasoned at his goon-work as a helluva scary pseudo-mercenary (one even civillians can immediately recognize), whereas Bill is a seasoned goon that isn't a renowned merc but is still really good at his job and also blends in easy with crowds (bc nobody knows who he is). like. Mitchell Mayo is kind of the asshole "truly evil" guy that Bill could have been, y'know?)

● Confirmed murders: (within thepandaredd re-imagining canon)

↳ manipulated Butch Moreti (section above, still under "People") via using Big Belly Burger fries (Butch Moreti's favorite. "Man, you know that's my shit") and poisoning a dollop of ketchup that had been untouched on a paper plate -- arguably non-canonical bc Butch only exists in a drafted version of "Make The Condiment King Scary" and not the final version, but im ignoring that ■ well, actually, i guess Butch kind of is also in the final version as there is some unseen person cough-choking to the end, assumedly poisoned. that could be Butch. or a reference to Butch. who knows lol

↳ (the following is a bastardized summary of the "Make Condiment King Scary" final video; please go watch it) Mitchell killed an unnamed guy in a pot of hot sauce (technically, "extra hot sauce", still on the stove ■ "You know, when you drown, they say your lungs feel like they're on fire. Can you imagine what that's like with capsaicin added to the mix?" (this line is only in the draft version) ■ "Did you know that it only takes three pounds of ground up chillis, consumed in one sitting, to kill a man? Purely from the capsaicin. Well, I'll tell you what, he figured out what it's like to inhale that shit."). drowned the unnamed guy in a pot of it. it is how Mitchell Mayo got the nickname "Condiment King" from the press. ■ event in further detail: Mitchell was sent by Falconé bc a resteraunt "racket" he had been running (slang definition: "an illegal or dishonest scheme for obtaining money". i assume that means the place was a front for money laundering? that the "owner" went "no, fuck you, i actually like doing this"? that's kinda sweet. or maybe Falconé was doing "pay me for protection (from me)" thing, idk, that's less sweet but still admirable lol) had itself an owner who decided not to pay, "So I was sent to relieve him of his station". Mitchell let the guy finish up his meal, followed the owner into the back, stuck a gun in his face. but the guy was a black belt in karate, kicked gun out of Mitchell's hand, fought and tossed Mitchell around, then Mitchell held the unnamed guy's head in that pot of hot sauce "until the fucking bubbles stopped coming up". therefore, Mitchell Mayo killed a guy with hot sauce in a suit covered in condiments got the nickname "Condiment King"

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★★★ REGGIE BENSON (his second Marvel OC! yay!)

● unknown pronouns. (he/him implied via "dude" and "guy" diction? but idk, i use those gender neutrally myself)

● appearance: wears a red and a blueish-gray flannel with a black sherpa lining that is a zip-up jacket; ontop of a plain pale-red t-shirt. as a prop, Reggie often carries around an iPad (assumedly to draw on, write notes, and record audio with. i hc Reggie uses the Notability app a fuck ton, because that lets you record audio while you write notes which is great for lectures/interviews. Notability is a bit hard to draw with in my exp, but not the worst; plus you can switch apps easy. idk how well it works for Zoom/Facetime/online interviews, but in-person ones? esp pre-Wolverine-interview? Reggie probably used Notability a shitton. iPad is a very good prop pick for Reggie to have), said iPad seems to have a pale-gray case. Reggie also has a prosthetic leg (assumedly his right (the viewer's left) leg from how he looked down?)

↳ "How did I get [my prosthetic leg]? I, uh, mighy have asked Wolverine how he shaves? Listen, I'm just saying-- I know legal said don't talk about it, they asked, I want to tell them-- if a nuke gets dropped on a guy, and he comes back with perfectly shaved mutton-chops, I don't think it's unreasonable to know how he shaves his freaking moustache, okay?!" ("I, uh, I have been informed by legal team over at Marvel that I, I, I, uh, should stop talking about the Wolverine interview on camera. So, uh, can you just, tch, cut that, please?")

● works at Marvel Comics' Marvel Comics (bc Marvel Comics legitimately decided "let's put our comic company inside our comic-universe, selling comics about the heroes the universe has. like a graphic novel version of the news, except it is 'fictional stories with grains of truth' somehow", sure). thepandaredd explains this oddity a bit better over in the July 2022 compilation (which, for clarity, Reggie's introductory skits are over in the August 2022 compilation)

↳ Reggie's official position at the company is: "Earth 616 Reporter (Mutant Division) Marvel™️ Comics". Reggie just says "I'm a reporter for Marvel Comics" and that "Personally, a lot of the stories that I cover are a lot of mutant and mutant-related things." ■ they still say "Excelsior"/"'celsior" at fictional-Marvel, that's cool

↳ it can probably be safely assumed Stan Lee and Jack Kirby and whatnot still are still alive? since they were, at one point, in the comics? but idk if they are in the skit-world-of-thepandaredd. but they might be Reggie's co-workers?

↳ Reggie explains their job as a mixture of the news section and "the funny pages" section of a newspaper. it's reporting news, put in some graphics, and add "drama and spice to keep things fresh". ■ Marvel Comics (the fictional company) does try to be unbiased and also get "all the perspectives possible" (eg. the villains' pov). says that "Some people that rhe public has labeled as super-villains aren't really that bad of people to talk to. Others, (note: Reggie is clearly thinking of Mojo, more in a lower bullet-point) uhm [i cut out the heavy stuttering], some of the opinions are deserved." ■ Reggie sees himself as "I like to think of myself as their voice. I get to get their side of the story out to the people, y'know?"

↳ for work, Reggie has met with: Paste Pot Pete (no label within the skit. civillian identity: Peter Petruski. is sometimes also called The Trapster, but not in these skits lol) ■ Mojo (the skit labels Mojo as "Mojo. Media Tycoon. Professionally Gross. Entrepreneur. Owner: WatchMojo". Mojo is both his villain and civillian name. his alien species is called the Spineless Ones. in one specific comic-run, "Ultimate X-Men", he is a human named Mojo Adams, but i digress. Reggie gets general-canon-alien-Mojo, who terrifies/disgusts Reggie to the point that Reggie screams, even on video-call/Facetime) ■ Wolverine (the skit labels Wolverine as "Logan Howlett. Mutant. 'The Wolverine™️'. Avengers, X-Men, X-Force, History Teacher." Wolverine hates Reggie: he says "fuck that guy" and thinks Reggie is a total asshole) ■ Charles Xavier (the skit labels Charles as "Charles Xavier. Headmaster. Mutant. Xavier's School for Gifted Youngesters™️. Nobel Prize Winner". when asked about Reggie, Charles began by saying Reggie is "a fine young chap" until he was told this was off the record, to which Charles said "Oh, the dude's a prick.") ■ Namoor (Zoom interview. has fried the "complimentary iPad we gave him by going underwater" before, hope that doesn't happen again. is mentioned in skit, but not shown, so no label)

↳ i personally feel it is important to add Reggie will snort-laugh at some things the people they interview say, and Reggie will cover it up with a lie that the sound they made was "allergies"/that it is "allergy season"

↳ my hc: i think the Paste Pot-Pie interview was pre-Wolverine, and Reggie does all his interviews over Facetime/Zoom since losing his leg post-Wolverine interview? maybe legal over at Marvel advised it

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★★★ ARNOLD (a third Marvel OC! very little info tho)

● unknown surname. unknown pronouns. (hc: i googled Marvel's version of State University to confirm if Arnold was an OC or not, and i couldn'find anything to say he is canon so i assume OC. i know very little Fantastic Four lore. anyway, i see it says there is a dean already there-- which is to be expected, and universities can have multiple deans-- but that same dean does not have a forename. so i am hc'ing slapping Arnold onto this dean whose entire wiki says he just "welcome[d] Reed Richards when he arrived with the the Fantastic Four at State U to deliver a lecture", the end. so, my hc name is Dean Arnold Mencken, or just Arnold Mencken when he is not a dean, i guess. also, i looked what the surname means on my beloved search-engine of Surnames.BehindTheName because i LOVE name-meanings and intertextual references and whatnot-- and nothing came up. so i tried google, and a site called "Forebears.io" that i am unsure about entirely trusting says that it is a variant spelling of the surname Menken (which BehindTheName also had nothing on) and both means "One who lived in a monastery" which sounds fitting and i kind of have an "i don't know enough about this to say you're right or wrong, and i don't like that" opinion about. but eh. the character's surname was already decided. it's whatever, it's just a hc. if you want to see the fandom-wiki pages on Dean [No forename] Mencken, the one listing him as staff from State U is here and his own page is over here)

↳ insists students call him by just "Arnold" when they try to call him "Dean". Victor Von Doom compromises, somewhat, and switches from "Dean" to "Dean Arnold"

● is a dean at State University in New York (which, yes, is a real university). was dean at the time Reed Richards and Victor Von Doom were students

● appearance: wears glasses and a plain black t-shirt in the skit

● is in just the one skit from the 2023 Oct./Nov. compilation, unlikely to appear again but who knows!

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★★★ PROFESSOR FINGER (DC Comics OC)

↳ is actually a spoof on "Bill Finger", who worked on Batman comics. more below under Professor Kane's section (below, still under "People")

● he/him pronouns. unknown forename. (hc forename: Duval. after Marie Duval, the primary creator of "Ally Sloper" which was a then-famous Victorian comic strip to which her husband (Charles Ross) stole all the credit and was heralded as a comic genius for almost 150 years. only in the past few years, thanks to a comics historian named David Kunzle, has Marie Duval been given her full share of credit for what was ultimately her comic. but yeah, i checked if Duval is a forename and i found tons of people with it as their forename so hell yeah)

● appearance: unknown, Prof Finger was never shown on-screen

● switched mid-skit between calling him an "English teacher" and a "Philosophy teacher". (maybe he's English specialized in Philosophy, like ive had English college classes require we read "On The Consolation of Philosophy" by Boethius before) more likely, Finger is English and Jason Todd mispoke when he said "Philosophy"

● is a Professor at Tim Drake's school, and Tim is in his class; Jason Todd took his class, was implied to have taken it years ago. was called "Professor Finger" (note: not "Dr. Finger", this OC assumedly does not have a doctorate. which, it is fairly common for English profs to have up to a Masters, then its a toss-up if they stopped there or also got a PhD so that checks out. main reason i mention it is bc i kept making a typo the first time i wrote this section up calling him "Dr. Finger" and that isn't accurate, he was never called that in the skit, idk why i kept making the same typo).

↳ the phrasing of "Professor" leads me to assume this is university (idk how private schools work and if they have students call anybody "Professor") which Jason Todd i don't think is confirmed to go to university? (Jason Todd hc: i think he should go. i am very much Team Jason Todd The English Professor Or English (Public? or Gotham Academy?) High School Teacher (probably more likely public bc i can see Jason Todd wanting to reach out to disadvantaged youth at public schools moreso than help deliquent rich kids on principle. but i can also see him going "i dont want to hang out with teenagers who don't want to participate in discussions; i'm gonna teach on college campuses" bc he deserves students who are interested in his class, his life has been hard enough, let him have passionate students and, unfortunately, college English students are more likely passionate about the material than high school English students, idk what to tell you). but im also Team Jason Todd Takes College Classes (Mostly English) For Fun With No Intent Of A Degree tho. either or) and the only college Tim went to that i am aware of is Ivy University in Ivy Town. however, i think it is more likely both Jason Todd and Tim Drake are both taking college classes (or "has taken" in Jason Todd's case since it's implied he went Finger's class years ago, idk if he is implied to still attending or not rn, before was just my hc) at Gotham University in Gotham City, that feels like the most convenient place for them to both go. however, it would also make sense for this to be a reference to Gotham Academy (in which case Tim Drake is in high school and Jason Todd has since left), but again, idk if private schools ask students to call their teachers by "Professor". im probably overthinking this

● obsessed with Batman

↳ keeps having students every semester write a paper on the philosophy of Batman to the point that Jason Todd thinks "he should have a book of those by now"

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★★★ PROFESSOR KANE (DC Comics OC)

↳ is actually a spoof on "Bob Kane", who worked on the Batman comics 

↳ (if you want to read up on why Bill Finger and Bob Kane are being discussed like this, this article goes over a good amount of introductory information (https://boldentrance.com/how-bob-kane-stole-batman-from-bill-finger/) and i also recommend this reddit thread to get a bit more of a window into the DC Comics fandom dialogue about it (https://www.reddit.com/r/batman/s/sf8P8hgBxv). but yeah, there's better resources if you want to know more in-depth stuff, i just picked the most accessible, quick-to-read, starter stuff) thepandaredd has also done a few videos on Bill Finger and Bob Kane, but i can't find them even though i know they exist (edit: found them (on accident), it's within their "DC Comics Discussions 3" youtube video). but this is just thepandaredd doing a "Wouldn't it be nice?" alternate reality where the students protected Finger and ousted Kane for trying to steal Finger's job, the actions dictated here did not happen in real life. it's just a nod to the irl drama via the names involved (and also maybe the enough "psychology/philosophy of Batman" stuff to make a book is a reference that Finger kept a continuity book of all Batman and Batman-associated-characters/places he came up with so as to minimize continuity errors. i am not aware of Finger having ever written a "Psychology/Philosophy of Batman" book or anything similar for that topic ad nauseam, again, as far as i am aware, that's just a popular point of pop culture analysis to the point that even i have written a paper on it for college), it is not a summary of said drama

● he/him. unknown forename. (hc forename: Ross. after Charles Ross, of the "Ally Sloper" fame, who famously took all the credit that his wife, Marie Duval did to making this Victorian comic strip an icon of its time)

● appearance: unknown, Prof Kane is never seen on-screen

● "Professor Kane tried to steal [Professor Finger's] job last year, but everyone kind of ousted him"

↳ "Oh, gross, Professor Kane? That dude's a dick."

↳ "Yeah, that's what everyone else said."

↳ assumedly, since Tim Drake doesn't have his own opinion of Kane voiced (just "that's what everyone else said"), though Professor Kane is at Tim's school, Tim has not interacted with him one-on-one or had his class (my assumption would be Tim is avoiding Kane's classes since everyone keeps talking shit. why willingly take a teacher you know might make your life hellish for a semester? i do that with RateMyProfessor all the time). in contrast, Jason Todd likely has taken a class by Professor Kane considering his wording (which makes additional sense when you realize Jason Todd is unlikely to use the internet or features like RateMyProfessor due to him having grown up without much day-to-day/non-Batman-and-Robin tech before the Lazarus Pit. probably isn't a habit for him to look profs up); but it's also likely Jason just came to his own conclusions firmly after hearing enough rumors/second-hand stories about it, that does also fit Jason's personality

↳ "ousted" implies Professor Kane no longer works at that campus. but who knows, maybe

● (note: same as Professor Finger's section above, still under the "People" section— this guy is not "Dr. Kane", this OC assumedly does not have a doctorate. which, we don't know what kind of subject this Kane OC is a professor of. but, considering he tried to steal Professor Finger's job, i think it's safe to assume Kane is also an English professor. it is fairly common for English profs to have up to a Masters, then its a toss-up if they stopped there or also got a PhD so that checks out.)

● i'm not re-writing my notes on "is this guy a Professor at a university (Ivy University? Gotham University?) or at Goth Academy (high school)?" so look above in Professor Finger's section (above, still under "People") for my waffling on about that

● i'm guessing on the spelling of Professor Kane's surname based on phoentics + "Kane" is how Bob Kane spelled his surname (same goes for "Finger" except i don't think there is any other way to spell "Finger"(?), unlike Kane/Cain/Kain/Cane/Kayne/Cayne/Caine/Kaine/Caigne/Kaigne/etc, you get the idea). i assume Professor Kane is unrelated to the DC Comics Kane (fictional) family/families (eg. one family is Katherine "Kate" Kane (Batwoman), Mary Elizabeth "Bette" Kane (Hawkfire), and Jacob Kane. another Kane family is the father-son duo Jesse Kane and David Kane (Black Manta; though i think it's more popular for Black Manta's civillian surname to be Hyde in-comics), from the live-action "Aquaman" movie series. and another is Cassandra Cain (Oracle; in some other universes, her surname is Wu-San though) and her father, David Cain; though that one is if i assumed incorrectly about how to spell Professor Kane's surname. and so on, im sure there's others with a variant of this surname. a lot of people in the DC Comic workspace used the surname as either a Biblical reference, which is not that important to what i am discussing here, or in tribute to Bob Kane before everyone knew about how much work should actually be attributed to Bill Finger) but yeah, hc to your heart's content if you want Professor Kane to be related to someone. just because there is no evidence of confirmation does not, in this case, mean there is any evidence of contradiction either. (hc: like i prefer Jacob Kane to be a good guy, bc Katherine "Kate" Kane (Batwoman) deserves a decent dad. but i know in the "Gotham Knights" game (idk if this is true anywhere else), Jacob Kane is a member of The Court Of Owls, specifically "The Voice of the Court". i think the Waynes/Kanes having a connection to the Court makes sense. i think it's kinda off to have everyone in the Wayne/Kanes be good, and all other rich families in Gotham have at least one bad egg in The Court of Owls; i think the Wayne/Kanes should be included as part of that corrupted mess, just, probably someone outside of the Batfam and their immediate relatives. id be perfectly happy having Professor Kane be in the Wayne/Kane family as the representative associated with The Court Of Owls in Jacob Kane's place. maybe he can be Jacob Kane's crotchety old uncle or someone in the family closer to Kate's age, but someone who they are all but officially estranged from. hence, no idea he/their family was involved in the Court. if you prefer drama tho, i don't think anybody really knows anything about Bette Kane's dad except that he's dead? maybe he came back, idk, basically all the Robins have died and came back. or maybe she has a brother, idk, i prefer my "distant family" pitch more personally. but also then i kinda wonder why Professor Finger isn't dead via a Talon getting assigned to kill him, so i also don't believe my own hc pitch. it is the most likely option that Professor Kane could just be an unrelated, miscellaneously benign but dickish Kane lol anyway, i digress)

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★★★ TED (the Gotham transplant. DC Comics OC)

● unknown pronouns. unknown surname. (hc surname: Icarian. meaning i hc this character's name to be Ted Icarian. which "Icarian" is the adjective/noun form referencing the Ancient Greek lore character called "Icarus". most famous for wearing his dad's wax wings, flying too close to the sun, and falling to his death with a moral about arrogance, the sublime, and human error. which, y'know, is poetic because im hc'ing this as "uncorrupted Ted that has never been/has yet to become a goon" (more on that in a bullet-point below), ergo, "before the fall" morally and before Bill's-version-pre-reboot-of-Ted's fall from Wayne Towers ~73 stories high to his death from Man-Bat. so it is also a pun. also, as a brief self-note: applying the Hozier song titled "Icarian (I, Carrion)" to this intrepretation of Ted is fitting poetically and also funny in a dark-humor way. edit: Ted's life is going downhill fast between the first and second videos, and i feel like i accidentally condemned Ted with this surname lmao Ted, i'm so sorry)

↳ the following does involve hc, but also does analyze possible connections between "this Ted" and "the Ted mentioned within Bill The Henchmen's Confirmed Co-Workers section of Bill's whole bit above (yet still under the "People" heading)": i like to headcanon this is the same Ted who is/was Bill The Henchman's late coworker. since Ted-The-Coworker was established pre-Reboot Agent, this could either be a prequel to Ted dying from the Man-Bat (which btw the skit of that is linked here) or could be Ted in a rebooted alternate life. i like to assume the latter, because i think that'd be hilariously trippy for Bill to see his coworker still alive post-reboot but tragic that this Ted doesn't likely know who Bill is lol but also all of this, either way, makes the Henchman LinkedIn joke a few bullet-points down extra (bittersweet) fucking funny

● appearance: wears all black. first video included a black t-shirt and a black denim jacket. second video included a black scarf with a black-white-and-gray long-sleeve top.

● has a 4-door car. idk anything about cars. but has shot these videos, generally, in said car. so that is one of Ted's habits as an influencer → and now that car is where Ted sleeps, oh dear (at least is sleeping with a neck pillow? idk any silver lining here)

● now lives in Gotham (Batman's territory, which is in the East Coast and most traditionally is in pseudo-New Jersey), but is a transplant from Coast City (for context, Coast City's most famous protector is Hal Jordan (Green Lantern) if that helps you. it's in pseudo-California). lives in an apartment in Gotham → oh, god. uh, Ted no longer lives in an apartment in Gotham. Ted is now unhomed, now living in their car. their apartment was burned down into the shape of a giant smiley-face and there was a fireproof-paper note on "where my bed once used to be" that said: "Disrespect my Joker Fries again, bitch, and it won't just be the house". so. assumedly Ted's home was burned down by the Joker

↳ has lived in Gotham City "for 3 months". if you want to apply reality's timeline to the skit, hen he has been living in Gotham for 3 months from the point of recording the tiktok on 25 March 2024 (aka: 25 January 2024-ish is around when Ted moved to Gotham?)

● two jobs. job (1) is as an influencer, makes tiktoks (eg. "Top 5 Facts About Gotham City (from a Coast City transplant)" type videos. doing social media seems to be a side hustle or just for fun? each video has the top margin say "GOTHAM FYP" or "GOTHAM CITY FYP" so far (which i know is a fun trend people do and that's part of advertising that "hello, the following is comments about a fictional city; this a trend, i am a nerd (/tone indicator: affectionate); please do not think this is a real place (or that im stupid, as sometimes comic nerd get v patronizing in the comments. (eg. 'uh? op didn't know Harvey Dent was Two-Face? fake DC fan much' like? my comrade, it is a trend, it is a GAG, of course op knew, they did a skit playing as a character that's a Gotham civillian who wouldn't know that, oh my god, that's the BIT))", but also my not-tech-savvy ass assumes a part of it is also supposed to be a gag about the search-bar? and the idea is that the viewer is either watching Gotham City content within the DC-universe or, more likely, also lives in Gotham(?). idk. but yeah because [insert real city] fyp content doesn't ever have that "[CITY] FYP" stuff at the top that ive seen, but they do always have the search bar always filled in. usually with more "[real city] fyp" items, most generally it will be just "[city] fyp" but also sometimes the search bar says stuff like "[city] fyp to eat", "[city] fyp tips", etc as i watch the tiktok video VS. if i watch "Gotham FYP" content, my personal 50/50 experience on if my search-bar will give me more "Gotham FYP" content in my search bar or if it will be something else DC Comics adjacent, like a new movie. however, after saying all of that: i think i maybe went into an overthinking spiral again, ignore me if that is the case) summary content of video below in case application of Gotham Fun Facts is desired)

↳ does not think the Bat Burger lives up to the hype. thinks Joker Fries are not that good. prefers Big Belly Burger (same favorite resteraunt as Butch Moreti, another thepandaredd OC, above yet still under the "People" section). will still eat Bat Burger tho

↳ "Gang territory, here? Gerrymandered to fuck". have to change colors of outfit to keep safe

↳ Halloween is outlawed in Gotham (in part bc of copyright laws). even trick-or-treating is illegal

↳ Henchman jobs are available on Linked In. applying puts you on a watchlist for the GCPD but still

↳ Gothamites are both exaggerating about the crime rates here and not. Gotham has more than the usual number of villains but the crime is less of a disturbance than expected, in spite of how "in Coast City, we're used to, like, one intergalactic threat showing up every couple of months" VS "It is like almost every other fucking week here [in Gotham]"

↳ Ted got a Welcome Package when Ted first moved in. package contained: "a safety straw you use to drink out of fucking lakes, a gas-mask, [and] a gun"

↳ "The second the sun dips behind the horizon, the sky turns red. No, I'm not joking. Night-time doesn't exist. There are demon hours and that is when the sky is fucking red!" also, both Ted and i are chemically unsure how that works

↳ there are police blimps to patrol Gotham City from the sky. "I saw a dude jay-walk at, like, 2 in the morning; and, all of a sudden, a flood-light came out of the goddamn sky!" which Ted admits, despite having lived where Green Lantern "used to be" (is that verb-usage related to the Superb Prowers insurance question about Coast City being gone now? is Green Lantern also gone? idk), Green Lantern did not get Ted used to this kind of shit at all (fair)

↳ despite there being "like 10 million people living here", "more than half" of the buildings here are of abandoned buildings and all of them were former businesses (hc/theory: Ted, those were probably the results of fronts for money-laundering, and they they had to shut the place down in order to avoid the cops. and also poverty, making a honest business as a newbie entrepreneur with no familial pre-established networking is very hard, i imagine, esp with all the "pay my gang for protection (from our gang)" stuff. that doesn't help) ■ yet Ted found a way into a (working?) bathroom in one such building, admittingly under duress (Mitchell Mayo (Condiment King) was chasing him) ■ "half the residential buildings are abandoned apartment complexes"

↳ Ted finds Robin (assumedly Damian Wayne; "a 12 year-old running around with a sword") is "scarier than you would think". not necessrily that Robin is scarier than Batman, but that not enough people warn you about Robin. plus the fact that said Robin has "two brothers" where "one of them is fucking packing heat and the other is just going to fucking beat you to death with a billy-club!" (okay so, that is assumedly Jason Todd (Red Hood) and Tim Drake (Red Robin). makes sense, since Dick Grayson is largely looking over Bludhaven, he would not be present, and Duke Thomas (Signal) is largely working day-hours. Ted is not going to be happy to find out that there are more than just those two tho) ■ "the Robins" went after Ted for loitering? bc Ted was trying to find a place to sleep, homeless, in their car?? "Loitering is a big thing here" (hc: i don't like the idea of the Batfam caring about loitering (which is v racially charged "crime"), much less pestering the homeless?? especially Jason, who im p sure did sleep on the street at some point. but i can accept the idea that they saw unfamiliar plates on the car and wanted to check out "who the hell is driving this slow (looking for where to sleep) at 2AM from Coast City?" and pulled out the random loitering as an empty excuse (reality: was checking this dude wasn't a runaway robber from Coast City, looking for a place to break-into, mostly to hide-out and maybe rob; and then realized the truth about Ted's situation). i can also accept them gently being involved in the homeless' lives so as to better protect them, remember them, break the ice, and just (again: gently) hazing new people. i like the idea of Ted seeing a couple comments from other unhoused people explaining that "getting to know you" method. just messing with Ted while they got down some details to look a bit more into Ted (eg. Damian memorizing Ted's license plate while Time distracts Ted might lead the trio to an article explaining how Ted lost that apartment) and see if they can get Ted off the street without being so obvious as to dish out hand-outs since some people have really negative reactions to those despite the good intentions. idk. it was just a gag, but one that greatly confused me so now i am spinning it and righting it in my head lmao)

↳ the G.C.P.D. police have to be at every single graduation from college. because, and this happens so often, that someone gets their doctorate and right then and there decides to commit their first act of super-villainy at the ceremony. part of me wonders how Ted learned that, what graduation did Ted attend or did Ted hear about it from others? idk

● second job: unknown. assumed to be Ted's day-job or main occupation (with social-media as a side thing).

↳ has co-worker there named Alex (confirmed he/him pronouns. Alex's duplex is split between Penguin territory and Two-Face territory. "has to change colors if he wants to go to the bathroom". Alex does not get his own section because this is all the info i got on him ■ though i will also say there is another Alex, likely unrelated for reasons listed in the other section, in The First Universal Henchmen's Union section's "confirmed members" listing, above, and said section is all under the overall "Associations" heading)

● Ted's Enemies, i guess (hopefully just temporarily): Joker (pissed off due to Ted dissing the Joker Fries; burned down Ted's apartment and left a threatening fireproof note) ■ Mitchell Mayo (Condiment King) (was also pissed off by Ted's food opinions, though Mitchell's was implied to moreso be about the Bat Burger; chased Ted into an abandoned building's bathroom and pounded on the door of said bathroom while yelling at Ted) ■ i assume there will be more

● (@/thepandaredd, if you're reading this, i know i said i have hcs but i truly do not actually care if this Ted and the previous dead-Ted are two different Teds, the same Ted but a prequel version, the same Ted but now rebooted into an alternate life... all i ask, is that Ted is not the next "Todd". it would be so fucking funny if you made a third Ted (even funnier if this one was Tedd, with two "D"s, but that is nOT TO GIVE YOU IDEAS), but i am also begging you between laughs once again to please consider not making more DC OCs named Ted. that is so close spelling-wise to "Todd". please. and thank you for coming to my TED Talk (ba-da-tish)) [/tone clarity: this is me complaining as a bit. do what you want, it's your tiktok and your OCs. im just joshing. ill be fine if you do more Todds and Teds. much love to you and yours ♡]

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★★★ THE REGRETTABLES RE-IMAGINING PITCHES (exactly what it sounds like. not quite an OC, but fuck it)

★ you could also argue "Daniel Dyce (#711)" of "Regrettable Superheroes" is a pitch of an OC of thepandaredd (specifically, thepandaredd pitched for him to become a gag villain in Gotham who keeps breaking out of Arkham). which, uh, i do also have notes on. but i will not be sharing within this post because a lot of it is "me myself brainstorming a re-imagining of this character" which feels too tangiental to put here in "thepandaredd's original characters and associations" post. and, yeah, you would have assumed thepandaredd would have further re-imagining pitches of some of the "Regrettables" but these were the rare ones i could find and i am p confident i've watched all the videos in that series bc i was looking for exactly these kind of notes. all the rest were "Regrettable, don't bring them back" or "Not regrettable, bring them back (with said opinion not including a pitch for their re-imagining. at most just a vague 'as a gag'. anything more than that and i will attach them to this/my thepanndaredd's OC list)".

↳ but yeah, that was from a two-parter tiktok from 8 June 2023 (or thepandaredd's 2023 June Monthly compilation video, either or). i'm generally gping to keep these summaries short bc their pitches are short. but thepandaredd's pitch for Daniel Dyce is to have him come back as an Arkham Asylum patient who keeps breaking out of his room #711, and is a gag. Daniel is just delusional, keeps fighting the Batman and Bat-kids while thinking they are the villain Brick-Bat and that Dyce is a hero (read: Dyce is not a hero in his re-imagining, that is his altered reality he thinks he is living. he fails spectacularly every time he tries heroics). alternatively, it could be the Riddler putting on a Batman cowl to fuck with Dyce and make Dyce think Batman is bad (similar as to Hush), taking advantage of Dyce to throw in Batman's way. it is implied that Dyce does belong in Arkham and was not a case of Damon and Pythias* gone wrong, that was just another delusion in thepandaredd's re-imagining. but yeah, just a one-shot gag villain

↳ *: as a fun-fact the nerd in me wants to mention: Daniel Dyce's shtick with his best buddy in terms of the prison-swapping is actually an intertextual reference to the Ancient Greek lore story of Damon and Pythias (except Damon and Pythias was about Pythias being on death row (the version i know is Pythias being framed by King Dionysus I "for trying to kill King Dioynsus I". bc. King Dionysus I wanted to get rid of Pythias. for. reasons that i forget that i think were political), and Damon volunteers to be Pythias' placeholder (and be executed in Pythias' place if Pythias never returns) so Pythias can settle some affairs back home himself and ensure his family is taken care of before he comes back to be executed. then, in the original story, the whole time Damon volunteers and waits and waits and waits, everyone says "Damon, dude, Pythias is totally not going to come back, you're gonna die in his place, i'm so sorry, there is no way he is going to come back" but Damon has faith and then Pythias does come back (and was almost too late, like Damon's head was on the chopping block awaiting the blade, because Pythias got thrown overboard his own ship by pirates and swam as fast as he could to get back on the path so Damon wouldn't die, which is fucking wild, but i digress). and King Dioynsus I is so touched by the sheer Pythagorean Friendship moral ideal these two are that he pardons Pythias! so now both he and Damon get to live, yaayyyy!! and, as a bonus fact, the most popular recent re-telling of this in contemporary times is Dreamsworks' "Sinbad: Legend of the Seven Seas", which is an animated pirate movie, ain't that neat. and, hey, while i got you here, you should watch Breadsword's "Sinbad and The Death of Pirate Cinema" on youtube because all of Breadsword's video-essays are poetic and make me wanna cry). uh, except if you have seen the two-parter thepandaredd made about Daniel Dyce (or somehow read Daniel Dyce's comic yourself), you'll know that's not how shit went down for Daniel Dyce, he did not get that happy ending lmao rip

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★ next one is "Tony Trent (The Face)". again, i have notes about running with this pitch. not included here bc it's Very Much Me which is tangential for a thepandaredd OC listicle and im already pushing the envelope with my hc additions i couldn't bring myself to delete for the public version. so here we go. this one has a pitch way more minimal than Daniel Dyce (#711) right above, but still got more than just "as a gag" so here we are lol (plus, there is no intertextual reference i am recognizing and wanna be a nerd about. sooooo...) thankfully tho, this will be shorter

↳ video is in the May 2023 compilation. is p just putting a Halloween mask on and scaring people.all because he, as a radio announcer and part-time news anchor, got so disheartened and angry by what he had to read everyday, that he just had to become a night-time vigilante. he is like a private-eye pulp detective, "he's like Batman but shitty". "No gadgets, no superpowers, no supervillains, no continuous enemies". thepandaredd's re-imagining pitch is to keep all of that and just, as a parody gag, have this guy show up in Gotham to make a difference and have everyone be like "No, dude, we fight Batman? Who the fuck are you?". because, as thepandaredd so eloquently said "He's just a guy!" that's it lmao rip

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the end, until i update this (if i ever do)

[theyluvlyss]

/ᐠ-˕-マ~ intro !

𝐡𝐚𝐢...

...and officially welcome to my blog/account ! I like to entertain the thought that I am a girl of many interests, talents, and, most definitely, thoughts. so, this is the place where I get to release and showcase them !

it would be an absolute honor for me to be able to, not only do something I enjoy, but allow any others who'd like to indulge to enjoy as well :). but, be aware, my main skill here is my writing, so that's something you'll see most often.

you (reading this lol) are welcome to explore, and should you have any questions at all, don't be shy in asking. I'm a very open book, so this is a non-judgemental, friendly, anyone welcome and encouraged, safe space :).

to learn more on the topic of myself, you can always check out the about me page. to explore what fandoms I'm in and what I love to run my mouth talk about, then you should go to the heart. if you have any questions by the end, you can always check out the faq's page. Continue reading further down to see how my account operates, and what you can do to make this the best experience for yourself ♡.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ...𝐛𝐚𝐜𝐤 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐞𝐥𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐩𝐚𝐠𝐞

───────── 《 .°•♡•°. 》 ──────────

/ᐠ-˕-マ~ Please respect all boundaries written below or you will be ignored/blocked. Thank you !

𝐫𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 -

《 ♡ 》 I will write any and everything for whoever is requested, just as long as it's someone from any of my master/fandom lists. don't be afraid to get creative !

《 ♡ 》 be specific/detailed with your requests, it's a hugely appreciated help🙏🏽. and don't forget to mention whether you want it to be a full imagine, a list of headcannons, a oneshot, etcetc.

《 ♡ 》 you can both request in my inbox or dm (direct message) me, both are fine, and I encourage you not to worry about the length or "absurdity" of your request, for a truly good writer will work with whatever has been given (in my humble opinion). "A writer typically writes what they know." - don't ask, I forgot who roughly said this.

《 ♡ 》 please include in your request if you'd like to be added to any taglists ! every single thing I write for will have/has one, and if you'd like me to add your @, just let me know, and I'll be happy to do so. you will be tagged anytime I upload anything related to the taglist you requested :).

《 ♡ 》 as for requesting anything else (such as edits, collages, profile pictures, etc.), just make sure you let me know what/which characters, a certain/specific mood you might want, details and such like that.

──────────────

𝐰𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐫𝐮𝐥𝐞𝐬 -

《 ♡ 》 as stated before, I will write whatever I'm asked, but please keep in mind that I am only one person with a life outside of Tumblr. some things may take longer than others, but just know I put full effort and passion into every single one of my works that I do, you have my word. also, real quick; no, this isn't my writing style (the whole "lowercase, small words" thing I do is just for aesthetic purposes, my writing style is different).

《 ♡ 》 I do works for "character(s) x reader", "character(s) x OC" (which, again, please be very specific if you're requesting I do an OC of yours), and "character(s) + reader or OC", the "+" being an indicator of platonic/sibling type relationship rather than romantic. also, don't be shy to spice reader up, too ! I love doing dynamic work :D ! ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ ㅤExample: bimbo!extroverted!reader x character!

《 ♡ 》 I do write smut (mainly just for the practice tbh), but please be warned and advised that all characters will be aged up (if not already), no matter the character/fandom, and that I probably won't do anything t o o heavy.

《 ♡ 》 I do NOT ship/write romantic relations with any characters who are blood related, nor will I write for any characters with a significant/concerning age gap between them. do with this info what you will one way or another🤷🏽‍♀️.

《 ♡ 》 I do NOT do song requests. It's fine if you want a musically inclined reader or something, I don't mind. but do not give me a certain/specific song to base a work/request off of. I won't be able to do it, especially should you choose a song I don't like. sorry in advance for this😭.

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𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐦𝐨𝐧 𝐫𝐮𝐥𝐞𝐬 -

《 ♡ 》 if you don't like my writing, don't read it.

《 ♡ 》 if you don't like the content I post, block me.

《 ♡ 》 please do not leave any negativity/hate speech on my blog. not only will you then be giving me free reason to cuss you out (teehee) but then I'll get petty and ✨️block✨️ you before you can respond /ᐠ>⩊<マ ! no, but seriously, I don't tolerate any unnecessary/unwarranted hate here, so just run along if that's what you're here to do.

《 ♡ 》 if you have any other questions, please refer to the faq's page. if your question isn't on that page, feel free to put it in my inbox or dm me :).

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𝐰𝐞𝐥𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐞 -

I am open to...

《 ♡ 》 constructive criticism/suggestions. I love receiving help on how to improve my work, or just on some cool tips 'cuz tumblr likes to hide all of the cool stuff from me (like changing the font color to something other than the main seven offered /ᐠ-˕-マ...). just be nice/chill about it, please.

《 ♡ 》 meeting new people. I am always down to make new friends, so if that's what you want, I'm happy to indulge ! My dm's are always open for friendship for ages sixteen (16) and up :).

《 ♡ 》 venting. having a tough day? (don't worry, it's been a tough year for me💀). need someone to vent to who won't judge, will listen, and try their best to help/be there for you? you've come to the right girl. again, dm's are always open, so feel free to drop some tea/drama into the chat as if we've known each other forever, and I'll see what I can do to help :)♡. remember, you always have one person in this world who cares about you, and if you don't, it means I died lol.

《 ♡ 》 collabing/shoutouts. are you a writer, too? or have an edit you wanna show off, but don't know where to post it? I gotchu', bestie. send it over to me, and if it happens to align with one of my fandoms, I'll happily repost, show off, whatever you need me to do with hella credits to you ! I love to uplift my community, so I will take any chance I can to do just that :).

《 ♡ 》 commissions. on the topic of support, you guys are always free to show some extra love (only if you want, absolutely no pressure whatsoever) to ask for something extra specific under the notion that I receive compensation. prices and deadlines are negotiable, for now, so don't be afraid to ask and see what we can do ♡.

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𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐰𝐞𝐥𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐞 -

I am not open to...

《 ♡ 》 negativity/hate speech. again, I enforce that you do not leave hate. If you don't like anything I post, block me and/or continue to scroll on and find a blog that does interest you. I post for myself and for anyone who appreciates what I do, nothing more, nothing less. this also includes any unwanted religious mantra.

《 ♡ 》 badgering. if you've requested/asked something, please be patient with me. I definitely saw it (unless stated otherwise) and I'm doing my best to be efficient, but again, life happens. although, checking in is much appreciated and I don't have a request limit. I just mean badgering in the sense that I don't need you cussing me out because I didn't throw up words and/or shit out an edit the second you typed up your request💀😭.

《 ♡ 》 pro-shippers/toxic fanbases. do not bring that shit over here, keep y'all asses away from my peaceful, chaotic good self, and this blog. that's all I have to say. this is your only warning.

───────── 《 .°•♡•°. 》 ──────────

𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐬 : [active] [hiatus] [offline]

𝐫𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐬 : [open] [closed]

───────── 《 .°•♡•°. 》 ──────────

𝐬𝐨 𝐲𝐞𝐚𝐡...

...that's all for the introduction ! thanks for reading, and I hope your pillow is cold on both sides, you get your favorite food in the next ten minutes, and that your allergy to cats is miraculously cured.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ/ᐠ^˕^マ~ 𝐛𝐚𝐢 !

[salmonidos]

Personal spiritual rambles and introspection ahead

Hm. Weaving nets

Imma put in bold what I think is most relevant from my word vomit.

Last reading I got said something about this and in first instance I didn't understand. Not sure I do still but curious I got specifically that card, I am so new to all this small things like those never fail to surprise me and I go all like "oh shit ok this is happening" fjslssjdlckdl. I thought it meant like making contacts with people which I'm not discarding but it felt a bit off at that time. Work with Loki went from chill to scary real fast but the scary is not about Loki, it's about me being scared of change I'm sure. Yet it's so rewarding. A lot is going on yet I think it's the perfect moment for me to get serious with this. I think he was patient at first because he knew how difficult it was going to be for me to kickstart it. Or perhaps he was waiting for me to take the step of properly asking... not leaving it as an uncommitted maybe. And now I have committed.

So, we did harsh truths once, and it was hard and it stang deep but overall was for the better, now we're onto second harsh truth I am struggling to see I think? Doesn't help my memory is shitty af and tunes out what I learn... Or perhaps I don't want to see it, perhaps I am avoiding it, perhaps I should just write it down when I think about it yes? I might start carrying a small journal with me... or just post it here. I do tend to get this weird head pressure when there's something I can't see yet, as if my brain was hiding info from me. I think I'm slowly getting closer to figure out something useful. I mean, I have been doing stuff useful for my personal growth, I think I am too impatient too. Change doesn't always come quick and sudden, but I always seem to want it that way.

I think my general failure to see the bigger picture keeps me bound to small details which in the end makes me lose sight of the rest of interconnected things... making a single knot bigger than it should be, bearing more weight than it should, in a net that should be balanced - or at least I want it to be, a bit more. There's a lot of strain... That is one thing. So I am working on my perfectionism but I think that's not exactly the issue, rather like, hyperfocus, overworry; is one of the things. I'm too caught up with what's familiar to me and struggle accepting the new. Ohh. Struggling to accept and implement changes, to see myself differently... There we go. Back to that square? I guess it makes sense if I have been taking refuge in familiarity all my life. Ok but, back to that square in some areas. I have made progress with change in others.

I gotta think about rewiring my brain, way of thinking, concept of self and how I see and interact with the world around me. I do struggle with connecting to the external world and get too caught up with myself (autism related isolation and social difficulty plus trauma are fun!/s) but my brain net as I'm picturing (?) is old and weary and barely handles the weight of the current circumstances. It is unbalanced and what worked back then doesn't work nowadays. Self-isolation, freezing and avoiding isn't it and there's a lot of things I react to this way that should be worked on and changed. Rather that I should work on and change, nobody else will do that for me lmao.

Change doesn't come through sudden epiphany most of the time. Sometimes it does! but it's extremely situational dependent. And even so you can go back to familiarity pretty easily. Something becomes familiar and automatic through repetition... so picking one thing to do differently and repeat may help. And nets, interconnected. Okay. So changing one small thing through repetition consistently may cause changes in other areas. Like that's how people do it right?

I think I might get another reading soon. Perhaps today or sometime this upcoming week since I have more free time. It might be useful.

Okay writing about this helped I think, new viewpoint. Now I gotta decide on how I'll apply this... and not leave it just at thought.

[windvexer]

Chicken! Question on discernment and practicing. How do you practice discerning between the real answer and your brain providing answers you want to hear? Or like if using your ping method and you get nothing back?

Hey you!

One of the most important things I've done to discern between real & brain-garble answers is understanding my limits.

Developing discernment can be less like building a new tool, and more like uncovering a buried one with those little archeologist brushes.

These limits and barriers can be discovered by doing lots of different exercises under lots of different conditions. A lot of these exercises should be approached with the mindset that you're trying to learn more about yourself than anything else.

If your mindset is, "if I'm bad at these techniques it counts as a failure and indicates that I'm Not Psychic," you're gunna have a bad time. If you are able to reframe as, "this technique is an opportunity for me to learn about myself, so it is a game I cannot lose," things get a lot less stressful.

Extra infos in no particular order:

Practice what is verifiable. I could discern auras all day long, but that's not verifiable unless I can go up to the person and ask them to confirm my interpretations. (Non-verifiable practice can be calming and take the pressure off, like creative mode on video games; no need to force yourself to do only verifiable practice all the time :))

The verifiability is what we need in order to gather information: was my discernment accurate, or not? By plotting these data points over time and as our skills improve, we will learn so much about our own abilities.

Not all of us can discern the same things, right? I've never been able to do the "guess what this card is" game. So if one technique isn't working for you, or one 'domain' always falls flat, switch things up and move on.

A major part of me knowing what's "real" info and what's just brain garble is the experience to know the 'domain' I'm trying to read on just isn't within my abilities. You want me to tell you what card it is? Well you're getting brain garble for sure, I can't discern those types of things.

Lend your mind towards examining many variables. If trying the ping method, consider these variables when talking to plants: Plants used in spells versus those who are not. Young vs old, plants you take care of vs strangers, day vs night, sunny vs rainy, healthy vs diseased, isolated vs near other plants. Hearing nothing back might be because a tired plant was in the middle of a growth cycle and didn't have time to talk to you, not because you were unable to hear.

Or, the card reading trick with playing cards vs tarot cards. Store bought runes vs hand-made ones. Be quick to consider variables and slow to discount yourself.

(Other variables include you: your amount of sleep, food intake, recreational chems such as caffeine and alcohol levels, etc.)

Try focusing on your body, not just your mind. Your body may have vital sensations and signs (vital, pun) to help clue you in to your intuition.

I believe every act of discernment (about mundane situations or otherwise) and every act of focusing on psychism and intuition will improve your overall magical discernment.

Not every practice session needs to be 30 minutes you pencil in to your calendar. Try practicing all the time, with small things. Like... is your favorite mug going to be in the cabinet when you open it? What will the next commercial be for? Try to find 2-4 single-player games you can practice regularly throughout the day, so that when you feel like practicing, you always have something nearby.

By practicing lots of different verifiable techniques and always striving to gather data, over time you can gain a deep sense of how your abilities work. This includes your own personal awareness of how it feels inside your body+mind when you are discerning correctly, or not.

Over time & with practice, you can develop your own techniques for improving your discernment. Stuff that's unique to you and custom built for you :) but you can't get there until you start with practice.

Developing psychism & discernment is a bit like playing the guitar.

On one hand, it is a muscle you must develop and strengthen. This takes time. If you have 0 musical experience, even if you practice the guitar every day, it takes time for you to be able to strengthen your fingertips and hands enough to play it (and then develop muscle memory).

On the other hand, it is a skill you must cognitively learn and understand. This also takes time. Your hands can be strong but you can fail to understand the music; you can understand the music but have delicate fingers that can't hold down the strings.

Psychic techniques are nothing but notes and chords for you to practice. They are not keys that "unlock" anything.

I really do believe that people find techniques and think it's like a magic wand - that the technique itself is a key or doorway to power, and if they complete the technique and fail, it either means A) the technique doesn't work, or B) they are not psychic.

Techniques are just chords. You use them to simultaneously develop your muscles, and learn about the instrument you're trying to play.

If you require several weeks of regular practice before you are able to tap into your psychism, there's no technique that will suddenly develop that. Just like there's no spell to make you wake up tomorrow with bigger muscles and also you understand Kung-Fu.

So don't be discouraged :) just practice, practice lots of different things, verify everything you can, learn bunches, and remember to take a lot of breaks.

[purpleqilinwrites]

first dates.

a/n: i just wanted to have something cute to open my blog with. i'm also helplessly in love with every single of them and want to wear their jersey to their games.

fandom: haikyuu!!

characters: bokuto, kuroo, oikawa, sawamura, ushijima

genre: fluff

info: first date things

warnings: -

Bokuto Koutarou

It’s very likely that he asked you out on a date without any prior planning, so Bokuto will just drag you anywhere that seems fun when you accept

He will literally pull you along to places because he’s so excited that it’s just you and him now! You’re like a real couple now, and he can’t quite process it yet but he’s so happy about it.

If there’s one place that Bokuto will definitely take you to, it’s the arcade; it’s fun and he can look awesome and be a good boyfriend by winning things for you! He immediately has his eyes on the biggest prize there.

If your legs are getting tired from moving around so much or being on your feet for so long, he will insist on carrying you

Bokuto will offer to pay for things without considering how much he can actually afford. If you tell him you won’t accept the thing because you don’t want him to spend that much on you, it reminds him that you’re such a kind person; no wonder he likes you so much!

If you tell him you had fun at the end of the date, he will ask you “so I’m your boyfriend now, right?!” and then he’ll start throwing out suggestions for what to do on your next date

Kuroo Tetsurou

Kuroo is more of an indoor guy, so he would like to go on a chill first date that’s preferably at a quiet place. Bookstores that have a café attached are some of his favourite places to hang out by himself and with friends, so he’ll take you to his favourite one.

He wants you to think he’s cool and grown-up, so he’ll order an Americano and make sure to tell the barista to “hold the sugar” when you can hear it, even if he usually has his coffee with sugar (if you ask, he says it’s to cut the acidity that he doesn’t really like in coffee)

Kuroo doesn’t really have a sweet tooth, but if you order a dessert to go with your drink, he’ll buy the same one you’re getting; he’ll also offer to pay for you because he’s sweet like that

Suddenly he has sweaty hands because he’s with you, and the two of you are alone together; he hopes you don’t notice the incessant hand-wiping

When he gets nervous because he feels like the conversation’s starting to dry up, he blurts out random scientific facts

He’s quite quick to beat himself up over how the date went, so it means the world to him when you suggest picking up the tab “for next time"

Oikawa Tooru

He has a very detailed plan for your first date, and he thinks it’s well-researched because he read tons of articles online from many sites to come up with it

Oikawa’s almost trying too hard, especially since his plan is time-stamped. If the two of you don’t get seated at the restaurant by the time specified in his plan, he starts to feel like the date is going badly.

He picks an Italian restaurant, because a lot of the articles he’s read suggested it as a good first date option.

Practised how to pronounce the possible menu items in an Italian way beforehand, so it will make him feel much better about the unforeseen long wait to get seated, plus you can see that he’s cultured. If you compliment his pronunciation, he’s ready to actually start learning Italian for you.

Low-key wants to re-enact the spaghetti scene from Lady and the Tramp, so Oikawa’s definitely ordering spaghetti Bolognese and asking you frequently if you want to try some

There are a lot of things that could go wrong because of the way Oikawa approached the first date and how he was maybe too fastidious about it, but the smile on your face after is worth all his stress. It’s a huge bonus if you compliment him and say it was “romantic”.

Sawamura Daichi

Sawamura is traditional in the sense that he would like to take you out to dinner and then go for a nice, romantic walk under the stars

There’s this restaurant tucked away on the outskirts of the city where his parents like to celebrate their anniversaries; that place has a lot of good memories for them, so he wants to make happy memories with you there too

Arrives at your door too early and dressed more formally than you were planning to. Since you got a peek at Sawamura’s outfit before getting dressed, you can adjust what you’re going to wear to match him, though he insists you look beautiful regardless of what you’re wearing

If you’re wearing a colour that matches his outfit, he dies a little on the inside from how couple-like the two of you must look to other people

He doesn’t want small physical displays of affection, like holding hands, to be awkward between the two of you, so he does appreciate it if you’re somewhat casual about touching. If you occasionally tap his arm when you talk, it makes him feel less self-conscious about wanting to hold your hand.

Sawamura doesn’t expect anything at the end of the date, but he feels extra happy if you give him a kiss on the cheek when he sees you home

Ushijima Wakatoshi

In Ushijima’s attempt not to accidentally scare you off when he asks you out, he might just forget to mention that it’s a date

He takes you to the cinema and tells you to pick a movie. At this point, he’s not quite confident in his ability to hold a conversation with you yet, so he wants to watch a movie with you so there’s something the two of you can discuss.

After the movie, Ushijima leaves it to you to choose where to hang out; he’s really not picky. You can do some shopping or café-hopping or just wander around different stores browsing what’s on sale. He’s content just to accompany you.

While you’re walking around the mall with him, he keeps bumping into your shoulder with his arm. It’s not entirely on purpose, but it’s not quite an accident either.

You might just be able to see him smile for the first time; you have to be the one to suggest getting in the photo booth for a keepsake, but he’ll smile if you want him to so you have something nice to keep from the date.

Ushijima just doesn’t want to be a bore; any indication that you’re keen to see him again is good enough, but nothing’s better than when you say you “had fun with him”

[lathalea]

Day 25: Blame it on Cider, part 5

Here's today's fic for the Writer’s Month 2021 challenge (see @writersmonth for more info).

Hello, my beloved readers! Kudos for sticking around for nearly a whole month with me and my silly stories! 💙

Did you miss Thorin and Yrsa? Good, because they are back! I hope you remember how the last part ended: while the Orcs attacked Thorin’s merchant caravan, Yrsa and the baby escaped. Unfortunately, she didn’t meet Thorin again at the agreed time and place and started suspecting the worst.

I wrote this part in a real hurry, so I’m sorry about any errors etc. in advance.

Today's prompt: word: obnoxious

Fandom: The Hobbit Relationships: Thorin x Yrsa (Dwarf Female OC) Rating: T Word count: 3,5 k words Warnings: um, cold, mentions of bodily harm (just a tiny bit, nothing gorey), winter, and you’ll get a glimpse of how a typical Viking quarrel looks like (yes, this is a self-deprecating joke, ha ha, not funny) how the exhausted and almost completely frozen Dwarves try to quarrel, also: freezing cold

A special author’s note for @bitter-sweet-farmgirl: This part is longer especially for you, so you won't forget it so easily next time ;)

As usual, you can read this fic here and on AO3.

Have you missed the previous parts? Here they are:

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8

Khuzdul: Lulkh - fool Inbarathrag - goat Ursarusê - my tiny fire Khaglâ-dûm - Blue Halls (name of a Dwarven settlement shamelessly made up by me) Thorinuldûm - Thorin’s Halls (the place in the Blue Mountains where Longbeards lived after Sack of Erebor)

* * *

Blame It on Cider, part 5

Two months later

It has been over a year since Yrsa last drank cider, but she promised herself one thing: when this miserable escapade of hers was finally over and she was safely back at home, she was going to get herself seriously drunk. But first, she would make sure that there were no men around. She learned that lesson well.

The greatest flaw in her plan was that she found herself several days away from home. There had been barely any snow in the Blue Mountains in November and Yrsa was convinced that she could easily make one quick trip to a nearby village and back before the winter blizzards made the mountain trails impassable. Her dear childhood friend, Haldis, was about to have a baby and asked Yrsa to assist her when the time came. Yrsa was more than happy to oblige. The delivery was easy and without any complications. Haldis gave birth to a strong baby boy and her husband threw a feast to celebrate the blessed event. While everyone drank ale, Yrsa drank water, and now she regretted it deeply. If she drank anything else, even a cup of mead, she would probably have a hangover. Which meant that she would stay in the village for a few days longer. But a stupid encounter with a stupid king a year ago (who, later on, probably was stupid enough to lose his life fighting off the Orcs while she stupidly escaped instead of helping him) made her abstain from alcohol. Ugh. Not thinking about the king, not now. Frozen tears are not fun. Moving on to the downsides of being sober. Anyway, when that stupid snowstorm came all of a sudden, Yrsa (instead of laying in a comfy bed in Haldis’ home and complaining about a headache) was caught in the middle of it, completely unprepared. Thus, the stupid frozen tears that were absolutely not welling in her stupid eyes at all as she marched home.

That stupid snow covered the stupid mountain trail and she had to plow her way through the stupid snowdrifts while ignoring the stupid snowflakes getting stuck to her face. And on top of that, there was that stupid freezing wind. It felt as if her cheeks would fall off any moment now. She wrapped her thick scarf around her face, leaving only her eyes uncovered. That helped a bit. But there was something that made her situation worse. Curse her bad luck! The sky was darkening rapidly and it seemed that the wind was becoming even stronger. And if that was not enough, the stupid snowflakes decided to magically turn into miniature icicles at that very moment, viciously prickling her skin.

Yrsa tried to speed up, but how fast can you walk with snow reaching up to your thighs and merciless headwind trying to topple you over? Even so, she soldiered on and climbed arduously up the slope, trying to ignore the tiredness in her legs. She had to reach that ridge ahead of her before the last light of the day disappeared. There was a small shepherd hut in one of the caverns and she wanted to stay there for the night. It was only used in summer so it stood empty and cold now, but it would provide her with shelter from the weather. And who knows, maybe the shepherds left some of their food there? Shut up, Yrsa’s stomach, there was still some leftover food from the feast in her travelling sack. She just had to get to that hut, get the fire going and all would be well.

It wasn’t. Of course. She should have expected it. Bad luck struck again. Yrsa was halfway to the cavern, barely seeing anything through the relentless waves of icy snow directed at her by the stupid wind, when she stumbled over something and slipped, falling face down into the snow. It hurt when she tried to get up. It hurt when she tried to stand on her right foot. With a helpless grunt, she slumped down on the snow. Multiple layers of clothing, including her thick leather trousers made it impossible to check her leg, but she was almost certain that her ankle was sprained. It would start swelling soon. She wouldn’t make it to the shepherds’ hut now, unable to stand on her leg and walk, not mentioning crawling in that snow, with the blizzard becoming more and more aggressive. Yrsa knew she didn’t have much time. She was still warm now, but she stopped moving a while back and her body had already started giving her some not so subtle hints about the biting cold. Think, Yrsa, think… She needed to do something. Otherwise, when the snows melt in spring, the shepherds would find her frozen body and then write on her gravestone: “Here lies Yrsa, daughter of Yri. Died a pathetic death because she was stupid enough not to drink ale at a feast (and she didn’t drink because she was terrified of doing another stupid mistake like the one involving that stupid cider and that stupid blacksmith,no, a king and his stupid lips… and his other body parts, and she stupidly ran away, and now he’s gone, and she’s freezing to death, but nevermind, there’s not enough space on this gravestone to write it all anyway)”.

“Get up!” Perfect. Now she was hallucinating from the cold. The wind was howling above her, and she was imagining things. How did the wind learn Khuzdul anyway?

“Get up, you lulkh! You will freeze to death here if you don’t!” The wind roared at her angrily and then something appeared in front of her. A hallucination. A hallucination that gripped her coat and lifted her up from the ground, as if she weighed nothing more than a feather. She cried out in pain, instinctively resting on her stupid right leg.

“I have injured my ankle, you inbarathrag! I can’t walk!” Yrsa shouted at the dark silhouette in front of her, trying to be louder than the wind. Funny how the hallucination wore a dwarven coat with a hood, just like hers, and how hard its chest felt under her gloved hand as she tried to steady herself.

The hallucination grunted, “Are you traveling alone?”

“Yes, I was on my way to…” Yrsa started.

“I’ll carry you,” the hallucination interrupted her. A pair of arms wrapped around her. She was lifted unceremoniously off the ground, thrown over a shoulder and across his back. Yes, it was a “he”. Judging by the timbre of voice, even though barely audible in the howling wind, it definitely couldn’t be a Dwarf-woman.

“Hey! It hurt!” Yrsa protested.

“Good, at least we know that you do not suffer from frostbite yet, boy,” he grunted and moved ahead.

“I’m not a boy!” she mumbled into his arm and shifted. It felt definitely too corporeal to be a hallucination.

“Be quiet and stop moving!” the corporeal… someone snapped at her.

“If you go towards the eastern ridge, there is a…”

The Dwarf stopped in his tracks.

“I said: be quiet!” He let out a roar. “Save your strength!”

Yrsa huffed, but decided not to grace this obnoxious brute with an answer. The obnoxious brute in question started walking again, climbing up the slope roughly towards the direction she had been going. All she could do was wait, clench her teeth, and try to get her mind off the pulsing pain in her leg.

He was a Dwarf, that was obvious. She hoped he wouldn’t turn out to be some kind of a bandit. No. He couldn’t be. She would already be dead by now. But who in their right mind would travel through the mountains in this weather? Except for her, of course.

Just then the Dwarf stumbled, but regained the balance quickly. When she asked whether he was well, he didn’t respond. As he marched ahead, he stumbled several times more. It seemed that his left leg was more prone to fail him and so he favoured the right one.

“We are here!” He finally stopped and placed her against a wall so she could support herself.

They were at the shepherds’ hut. The mysterious Dwarf helped her inside, and bolted the door behind them, shutting it in the face of the howling wind and snow outside. Good riddance. Ysa rested her back against a wall and sighed in relief, taking off her scarf and hood. She was shaking out the ice from her hair when she heard a shout and then something hard and heavy bumped into her.

“Yrsa!”

“Ummpf,” she responded eloquently, unable to breathe as a pair of arms wrapped around her in an iron grip, and her face was pressed against a coat.

“Thank Mahal, you are alive and well!” She heard the Dwarf speak, his voice strangely muffled.

“Th… Thorin?” Yrsa finally recognized him as his hand cupped the back of her head, pressing her into him.

“I thought I would never find you...”

“Is that really you?”

They spoke at the same time, and Yrsa suddenly noticed that her hand was pressed against his bearded cheek. She could feel the shards of ice under her palm. He definitely didn’t feel anything like a hallucination. Thorin was really there.

“It is me,” he murmured huskily.

“I thought you were… I thought the Orcs…” she started.

His azure gaze rested on her, making her heart flip, his hood was off, revealing his reddened cheeks, the noble line of his nose, and that sable mane of hair she remembered so well, and her knees weakened, and then she forgot about everything else and kissed him, ignoring the ice against her skin that covered his moustache. It didn’t matter. His touch was warm, oh so very warm, and his lips scorched her with passion as he claimed her mouth, and she responded with equal fervour, and there was that pleasant buzzing in her head, as if she was drunk on cider again.

“Yrsa… Yrsa...” her name left his lips between his intoxicating kisses, but she didn’t care, her whole body tingling with a mixture of disbelief and joy. Thorin was here now, alive, safe and sound, and she didn’t feel the cold nor the pain anymore, because she was in her blacksmith’s arms. No. In the king’s arms. She froze. And it had nothing to do with the blizzard outside.

“Yrsa, I need to know…” he muttered, their lips finally parting.

Her eyes traveled to the soft curve of his lower lip. The king’s lower lip. Words deserted her. What was she doing? Kissing the king, of all people?! Again? Was she out of her mind?! “Ursarusê… Where is she?” His words reached her, a soft murmur.

Oh.

“The babe is safe with my family,” She spoke carefully. By the way, how had it happened that she was now stuck between a certain Dwarf and the wall? Suddenly, Yrsa needed more breathing space.

“Thank Mahal the merciful!” Tho… the king, the King of Longbeards exclaimed.

“But what does it matter to you?” Yrsa frowned. Yrsa was sure she should have used some decorous kingly title at the end of that sentence, but she was too exhausted to come up with one. Oh, and by the way, her leg was starting to hurt even more.

“Yrsa…” he purred and gently pressed his forehead against hers. “How can you ask that? The babe is our gift from Mahal. I am going to take you to my halls and take care of you and the little one. I wish to…”

“What are you talking about?” She moved away.

“I am talking about Ursarusê, who else?”

“But it is I who found her in that forest, not you! What do you want with her?” Yrsa crossed her arms across her chest.

Now it was his turn to freeze. And pale slightly.

“Found… her?” Thorin uttered carefully. “So she is not…?”

His voice trailed off and then she finally understood both his puzzling concern from before, his insisting on making sure she would be safe together with the babe.

“Oh, by Mahal’s hammer,” she chuckled nervously, bringing her hand to her lips. “You didn’t really think that she was your child? And mine? What a silly idea!”

He responded with a grunt and stepped back, looking away. Without his support, she swayed, letting out a gasp of pain.

“Allow me,” the king said gruffly and made Yrsa lean against him. He quickly transported her to a bed near the well-lit hearth, making sure she sat down comfortably. She stole a glance at his face, his features schooled into an impenetrable mask. Stupid Yrsa. Stupid words, stupid nervous chuckling at the most inappropriate moment. Stupid leg. Stupid snow. Stupid blacksmiths that turn out to be kings. Stupid cider.

“Would you…” she cleared her throat and spoke in a tiny voice, studying the grey blanket on the bed. Suddenly, the woven pattern looked very interesting. “I… I think my ankle is swollen. I don’t think I can remove that boot on my own.”

He only nodded, crouching and helping her with the boot, never speaking a word to her. In different circumstances, with a Dwarf who was, for example, a blacksmith, only a blacksmith and not a king, she would probably turn the whole situation into a flirty joke, teasing him about bringing him to her feet, and they would both laugh, and everything would be fine again. Now however, shame burned her cheeks. An offended king on his knees (a king, for Mahal’s sake!), pulling a boot off the foot of some commoner, was not a funny story, not at all.

Yrsa had no other option but to focus on what she knew best and instructed the Dwarf (trying to forget that this was, in fact, a king) on how to take care of her sprained ankle. His movements were careful and efficient. The way he bandaged her told her that it wasn’t the first time he did a similar thing (even though he was a king and he probably had servants to do it for him!). When Thorin was done, he asked her about any other possible injuries and discomforts in a detached tone of voice, but she only shook her head.

“Get some rest now,” he rose, speaking to the wall above Yrsa and then turned to the hearth. With his broad back in the way, it took her some time to realize that he started preparing a meal. As her body warmed up, exhaustion caught up with her rather suddenly. The last thing she remembered was wrapping herself in her thick coat and resting her head on the pillow.

Thorin woke her up sometime later and presented her with a bowl of stew, a deep frown still etched on his face. As they ate, the silence painfully rang in Yrsa’s ears. It hurt more than her ankle.

“Ursarusê is a foundling. When I met you, I was on the way to Khaglâ-dûm. I wanted to find a good family for her there,” she tried, her words echoing against the walls of the cavern.

“But you did not,” the sounds he made resembled the grunts of a wild animal. A wounded animal. Stupid Yrsa. “Just as you did not go to the Longbeards’ Halls.”

“To… where?” That place was completely unfamiliar to her, and she thought she knew the Blue Mountains quite well.

“To the halls of my people.”

“Ah, you mean the place where your sister lives…? Thorinuldûm?”

The king flinched, “Not the most fortunate of names.”

“Then why did you name it this way?” Yrsa understood less and less. Wasn’t he supposed to be that vain, prideful king who established a city in his own name?

“I am afraid that I had no say in this matter,” Thorin shrugged uncomfortably, his voice rising slightly, like a murmur of thunder. “You, however… You never went to see my sister. I believed that… no matter. Do I understand correctly that you simply chose not to visit the place at all? Not to meet me again?”

He shook his head and focused on his stew.

Yrsa poked at a chunk of meat with her spoon.

“I waited for you at the gates of Khaglâ-dûm for as long as I could,” she put her bowl away, even though it was still half full. Her stomach was tied in a knot.

“We were delayed. The wagons needed to be repaired after the attack,” he spoke after a pause, his eyes on the food. “And there were wounded.”

“Your leg?” she recalled. “Was it…” “It is fine,” he interrupted her harshly.

Once again, that horrible silence filled the cavern, torturing her.

“I did not go to your sister, because…” Yrsa paused, gathering all her strength and trying to find the right words. “Because I had to think of Ursarusê. I wanted to reach home as soon as possible. I didn’t want to impose on your family. An unknown woman with a babe in her arms - that would mean two more mouths to feed. Besides, why would your sister, princess Dis, help someone like me? I’m a Firebeard, and only a simple herbalist.”

Thorin studied her for a long while. Yrsa shifted nervously under his gaze.

“She would help any person in need. My family knows hardships all too well,” he finally spoke.

Stupid, stupid, stupid Yrsa. Why has she forgotten all about the Sack of Erebor? He was a proud Dwarf, a descendant of Durin, and she had just hinted at his family being not only too poor to help her, but also too cold-hearted.

“I’m… I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to offend you. Your majesty,” she finally recalled the correct title.

“Stop mocking me, Yrsa,” he gritted his teeth and stood up, empty bowl in his hand, his knuckles white.

“But… I’m not.” She was at a loss. It seemed that whatever she did on that day was wrong.

Thorin gave out a resigned sigh and approached her, stretching out his arm towards her.

Handing him her bowl, she stole a glance at his stone face, but his gaze was focused on the bowls in his hands.

“I do not understand you, Yrsa. First you… you choose me to spend a night with, and you seem to enjoy it, but afterwards, you disappear without a trace. Then we meet again, and you smile at me the same way as you did before, you promise to meet me, but you never do. Now you embrace me, teary-eyed, you kiss me, and then you push me away. What do you want from me, woman?”

Mahal, if he only knew. Shut up, Yrsa’s brain. There is nothing you should want from him. Thorin is a king. A king. Not a village blacksmith.

“Thorin, I’m… I’m sorry. You must think me a fool. You see, well, I didn’t want to put you in an awkward position,” her voice trembled slightly and she cursed herself. Stupid voice. “When I realized who you were, I didn’t want you to feel… obliged to anything.”

A sad chuckle rumbled in his chest, closer to a cough than a laughter.

“Is that why you left that wedding feast in such a hurry? Because you did not want anything from me so very badly?” Thorin spoke slowly and sat at the edge of the bed with a grunt, straightening his left leg.

Yrsa nodded, her ears burning. Why was he so bloody calm about it? Any other Dwarf would now shout, or growl, or stomp, or try to convince her to marry him because honor demanded it or something along these lines. But he just sat there with a frown, unmoving, like a piece of giant rock. And then he chuckled. How dare he? Giant rocks don’t chuckle!

“Is it so very funny?” she asked timidly. Her ears had to be on fire at that point.

“Oh, Yrsa. You are one of a kind. It seems that you always have to have it your way, doesn’t it?” he lowered his voice to a murmur. Low, velvety purr, like that dark wildflower honey she adored so much.

She gave out a helpless ‘hmph’ in response.

“If you do not wish to talk, at least allow me to speak the words I wished to say to you in Ash Creek,” he turned to face her, and there was a glint in his azure eyes, and it was so very not fair of him to have eyes like her favourite gems, sapphires.

“No!” She protested, backing away into the opposite corner of the bed. Oh sweet Mahal, it couldn’t be happening, not now! Couldn’t this Dwarf take a hint? This was not the time for THAT question, there was never a time for it! “No, there is no need to speak of anything! I do not need to hear it! Everything is fine! And besides… Besides, I'm tired!”

Yrsa gave out the most spectacular yawn in her life. She should have joined a theatre troupe with her skill.

Thorin rested his hand on the grey blanket that covered the bed. His fingers twitched.

“Very well, then. Let us sleep,” he rumbled. Yrsa didn’t understand why there was an amused spark in his eyes.

And then it dawned on her. There was only one bed in the cavern.

To be continued...

* * *

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8

Read it? Like it? Spread the love and reblog it!

Fell like reading more? Here is my masterlist for the Writer's Month 2021 event.

Taglist: @fizzyxcustard @shrimpsthings​ @dark-angel-is-back @sherala007 @amelia307 @anyaspidergirl-blog @jotink78 @rachel1959 @saltwater-in-the-afternoon @linasofia @legolasbadass @justfollowtheroad @bitter-sweet-farmgirl @yourqueenunderthemountain @reblogunderthemountain @guardianofrivendell @elrawienthewhite @xmly-xo @tschrist1 @nelleedraws @beenovel @vee-vee-writes @mcchiberry @shalinizhara @dumbassunderthemountain @errruvande @laurfilijames @emrfangirl

[idiotic-genius]

How to write an immersive scene

requested by @noa-i - check out their blog, they have amazing lists of helpful links to writing guides!

As a writer, it is mostly inevitable to get to the point in writing where you are questioning whether anyone will actually want to read what they have created. A question greatly important to writing something the reader gets hooked up with is: How do I lure them in and make them feel like they are part of something? Sometimes, writing immersive makes THE difference between a scene quick to skip over and a scene you can't take your eyes off. But how do you create immersion?

In this post: 1. Worldbuilding 2. Narrators 3. Writing visually 4. Setting the scene 5. Example to summarize

Step 1: Learn your own facts

It might be banal, since you are the author, to re-read your own notes and think about what you have written so far. However, to get the reader hooked up, make them INTERESTED. This is easily accomplished by creating a detailed fictional world that doesn't seem flat. It might be a tiring process, but it always pays off! Knowing exactly what kind of world your character finds themself in makes it a lot easier to fill in details that subconsciously make the reader believe they are dealing with an actual real-world instead of "just" a fictional one. But even though it may seem harsh, cutting out some details and facts might make the reader feel much more comfortable. Their mind wants to insert them into the universe they're reading about, so overloading them with too many unnecessary details can be just as defeating as giving them too little info. Here is a link to a great beginners-guide on worldbuilding.

Step 2: Know your narrator

As we all know, there are a bunch of different narrator types to pick from when starting a new story, and each of them is good for a different thing- reaching from the typical first-person narrator (The Hunger Games, Percy Jackson) over personal third-person (Warrior Cats, Harry Potter) to omniscient third-person (Anne of Green Gables) and biased third-person (A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy). If you are writing an unbiased third-person narrator in your WIP, you can just skip this step. However, if you have any indication at all in your story as to who the narrator is, you might want to think about this more closely. The narrator is the bridge that connects the reader to the fictional world. To immerse the reader in a book, it's usually easiest to use the first-person narrator or the personal third-person narrator, because that way the reader will either imagine themself as the narrator or as a friend of the main character, which keeps them interested. If your narrator is an actual character in the story, it is necessary to keep their speech and description patterns consistent with themselves and the events of the story. For example, a character narrating that has never visited a school or similar should not use highly scientific words to describe what's going on, etc, because it will interrupt the reader's reading flow and disturb the immersion just as much as time skips do.

Step 3: Writing visually

After making sure you have the narrator and the world they're in all set, it's time to choose a writing style, more specifically, to decide the visuality of it. What I mean by that is that having a fictional world so flat it's boring is just as bad as not describing it in a way that delivers it in the way it deserves to be delivered. Picture it like this: Every scene starts in a white room, with neither windows nor doors. If you as the writer don't describe what is going on in that room and what it looks like, at best while keeping the narrator's character in mind while doing so (to make it "3D"), the reader will never know what is actually happening. This also includes adapting the length and complexity of sentences to the scene: In a combat scene, you will usually find short and cut-throat sentences to represent the intensity and living-in-the-moment mindset of a fight, however, in a meaningful conversation between two characters about a heavy subject, it's more likely that longer and more complex sentences are of use to mirror the narrator's deep thinking of the subject and their concentration on the conversation.

Step 4: Setting the scene

By setting the scene, you fill in this white room in the reader's mind, adding characters, sounds, furniture, windows, and scenery in general, while still leaving space for the reader to fill in the blanks. To find a middle between these two extremes is up to every individual writer and depends on the writing style. If you over-describe the room, the reader will know every detail about it, but it will take away their focus from what is actually happening in the scene. However, if you don't set the scene at all, the reader automatically makes up what the room might look like based on what they imagine, and then breaks out of the immersion as soon as you mention something, later on, to be in the room that they did not picture. For example, if you just say that A enters B's bedroom, the reader might quite as well imagine there to be small windows, some bookshelves, a standard bed, etc. If you don't set that up right in the beginning and later on mention that B has small windows, the books stacked on the floor, a bunch of plants, an aquarium, and a bunk bed, the reader will get confused because it doesn't fit what they had pictured before. So ask yourself: What is so important that the reader should know it before the scene actually starts? Context also matters in that case.

5. Example

In the following, I will write the same scene multiple times in different styles to illustrate what makes a difference in writing immersion. The scene goes as following: Jae falls into a dark room underground with a hooded, mysterious person waiting for him. The hooded person greets him and lights a candle, and in the emitting light, Jae realizes who he is talking to. Remember: These are more caricatures of the different writing styles than actual representation and are very overexaggerated, but you get the idea.

1. first-person narrator (Jae), scene not set properly, no visual writing, no consistency in speech pattern

After three seconds, I landed on something soft and realized I had landed in a chamber underground, slightly lit by the moonlight above me. I walked through the only doorway and found myself in a second room. A hooded figure in the middle of the dark lifted their arm. From the table beside them, they picked up a candle and lit it using a lighter. "Hello, Jae", they said, and in the newly emitting light, I recognized them in front of the fireplace.

-> feels flat and jumpy, gives no significance to the change of scenery

2. biased third-person narrator, scene set properly, overly descriptive visual writing, consistency in speech pattern

After falling for what felt like an hour, even though it was probably just a few seconds, Jae finally landed on something soft. Before even attempting to get up, he shivered at the fresh memory of what slimy, earthy, suddenly appearing tunnels felt like. He stared up through the hole at the moon and the stars, and immediately recognized the constellation of Cassiopeia, high up above him. Cassiopeia is said to have angered the Gods, so they gave her the gift of divination, but made it so that nobody would ever believe her prophecies, finally banning her into the sky as this constellation. Weirdly enough, the stars' pattern doesn't look like a woman, or a human, at all. Jae slowly stood up from where he landed and realized he had fallen onto a rather big cushion with a print of primroses in yellow, pink, red, and blue. He looked around in my new location and found himself stuck in a small portico with no windows at all and only one doorway. The walls seemed just as dirty and muddy as the tunnel he had fallen through, and as he looked closer, he spotted about a dozen small, pink worms slithering through the soil. The floor on the other hand was made out of dark wooden panels- if you wanted to call it a "floor". The pieces were just loosely stuck onto the earth underneath, and mud squeezed out from the gaps in between. Jae slowly walked over them and reached the doorway after just four steps. He saw a hooded figure standing in the center of the next room. The room had two sources of lighting: One, the moonlight shining through the disgusting tunnel, and two, a crackling fireplace. It looked like it belonged in a small cottage, being made out of red bricks and looking a little old with the small black-and-white pictures put on top of it. The flickering orange glim of the fire met the silvery-white shine of the moon in the middle of the room. On the right side, Jae saw a big old round table made out of similar wood as the floorboards outside. There were obvious scratches on it, some made by smaller knives, others bigger and maybe made by swords, with splinters on their edges. Apart from two, the fours chairs around it seemed just as maltreated, but the two others were polished and reflected the two light sources, with no scratch marks at all. On top of the table rested a metal candlestick with one slightly burned-down candle stuck inside it. The candlestick had a few scratches as well, on the side and at the bottom. "Hello, Jae", the figure said snarkily, with a voice deep and rough like sandpaper. They wore a black cape, smooth on what Jae could see of the inside and rough on the outside, with a big hood covering their hair and most of their face. A few of the blue buttons with a golden pentagram engraved on them were missing from the coat, and it was slightly ripped in a few places. One strand of dark hair fell into the person's eyes as they reached out for the candlestick, lighting the candle inside with a silver zippo-lighter. The lighter had small scratches as well as a few symbols on it. Slowly, the flame grew bigger and bigger, until the shine from below reached the figure's face. Jae's eyes went big as he realized who he was talking to.

-> little place for the reader's fantasy, but details make scenery deeper and less flat. This kind of description does make sense if the narrator/the character the narrator fixates on (Jae in this case) is very observant and/or intelligent because they will notice details that others don't. The question is whether those details are important enough to keep in the story.

3. first-person narrator (Jae), scene set properly, visual writing, consistent speech pattern

After what felt like an eternity of falling and silently begging not to die from the impact, I finally landed with my eyes squeezed shut. Okay, legs, arms, and head still in place... I slowly opened my eyes again, realizing I had landed on a soft pillow with a flower print. Cautiously, I got up, gazing up at the tunnel through which I had fallen. The view of the slimy earth made me shiver involuntarily as I blinked against the bright moonlight far above me. The sky was clear enough to see stars, which could have been far more enjoyable if it hadn't been for my miserable situation. I had landed in a small chamber underground, with a single doorway leading into a bigger room. The walls were just pure earth and seemed to swallow all noise, but when I took the first step, the sounds of my shoes on the dark wooden floorboards and of the mud squishing out from beneath them was louder than I had anticipated. I could hear the crackling of fire from the next room and see the orange glow as I made my way over to the doorway and took a glimpse into it. The room was not very big, but also not as small as the one I had landed in. There wasn't much space because of a wooden round table and four chairs, which all seemed very old and maltreated, judging from the scratches on them. I could make out a few pictures on the fireplace, and in front of that- "Hello, Jae." I had to suppress a gasp as I realized that I was not alone. In the middle of the room, right where the silvery moonlight and the orange glow of the fire met, stood a hooded figure. Their coat looked as old as the few pieces of furniture, with missing buttons and rips. I couldn't make out much of their face, even though I squinted my eyes, but the flickering light made it hard to see anything, let alone recognize. But that voice... Before I could come to a conclusion, the figure reached for a metal candlestick standing on the table and lit the candle inside with a silver lighter. As the flame grew bigger, they dispelled the shadows below the hood that had disguised the person's features before. I could feel my eyes get big as I finally realized who was standing before me.

-> Gives enough information to "fill the white room" without dwelling on details too much, shows the context of the story, gives Jae a consistent personality

So that's it for this post! I hope I managed to pass on a thing or two that I learned while researching and that this post will help you with your writing. Please acknowledge, I am not trying to attack anyone's style of writing!! If you write the way I wrote a "non-immersive" scene, it does NOT mean that your writing style is bad, let alone wrong, because the existence of many different writing styles is what keeps it individual and interesting! Find your own way and let nobody get you down :)

[nim-lock]

Art Career Tips, 2021 Edition

Here’s an edited version of my 2019 answered ask, because... this feels relevant. 

It is a problem of capitalism that folks equate their income as a judgement of their value as people; and let me preface. You are worth so much. You have inherent value in this world. Your income is not a judgement on who you are (plenty of billionaires are actively making the world worse). LARPing self-confidence will go a long way to helping you get paid more for your work, because clients will believe that you know what you are doing, and are a professional. 

& real quick—my own background is that I’ve been living off my art since 2018. I went to art school (Pratt Institute). I work in a publishing/educational materials sphere, and a quarter of my income is my shop. Not all of this information may apply to you, so it is up to you to look through everything with a critical eye, and spot pick what is relevant. 

So there are multiple ways of getting income as an artist; 

Working freelance or full-time on projects

Selling your stuff on a shop

Licensing (charging other companies to use your designs)

This post primarily covers the freelance part; if you’re interested in the other bits there is absolutely info out there on the internet. 

IF you are just starting (skip to next section if not applicable) dream big, draw often (practice helps you get better/more efficient), do your best to take "a bad piece” lightly. You’re gonna RNG this shit. At some point your rate of “good” works will get higher. Watch tutorial videos & read books. A base understanding of “the rules”; anatomy, perspective, composition, color helps you know what the rules are to break them. This adds sophistication to your work. One way you can learn this stuff is by doing “studies”—you’re picking apart things from life, or things other people have done, to see what works, and how it works. 

Trying to turn your interests into a viable career means that you are now a SMALL BUSINESS; it really helps to learn some basic marketing, graphic design, figure out how to write polite customer service emails; etc. You can learn some of this by looking it up, or taking skillshare (not sponsored) classes by qualified folks. Eventually some people may get agents to take care of this for them—however, I do recommend y’all get a basic understanding of what it takes to do it on your own, just so you can know if your agent is doing a good job. 

Making sure your portfolio fits the work you want to get

Here is a beginner portfolio post. 

Research the field you’d like to get into. The amount people work, the time commitment, the process of making the thing, the companies & people who work for them. 

Create work that could fit in to the industry you’re breaking into. For example, if you want to do book cover illustration, you draw a bunch of mockup book covers, that can either be stuff you make up, or redesigns of existing books. If you’re not 100% sure what sort of work is needed for the industry, loop back into the portfolios of artists in a similar line of work as whatever you’re interested in, and analyze the things they have in common. If something looks to be a common project (like a sequence of action images for storyboard artists), then it’s probably something useful for the job. 

CLIENTS HIRE BASED ON HOW WELL THEY THINK YOUR WORK FITS WHAT THEY WANT. If they’re hiring for picture books, they’re gonna want to see picture book art in your portfolio, otherwise they may not want to risk hiring you. Doesn’t have to be 100% the project, but stuff similar enough. If you aren’t hired, it doesn’t mean your work is bad, it just wasn’t the right fit for that specific client. 

If you have many interests, make a different section of your portfolio for each!

Making sure you’re relevant 

Have a social media that’s a little more public-facing, and follow people in the career field you’re interested in. Fellow artists, art directors, editors, social media managers; whoever. Post on your own schedule. 

Interact with their posts every so often, in a non-creepy way. 

If you’ve made any contacts, great! Email these artists, art directors, editors, former professors, etc occasional updates on your work to stay in touch AND make sure that they think about you every so often.

Show up to general art events every once in a while! If you keep showing up to ones in your area (when... not dying from a sneeze is a thing), folks will eventually start to remember you. 

Industry events & conferences can be pricey, so attend/save up for what makes sense for you. Industry meetups are important for networking in person! In addition to meeting people with hiring power, you also connect with your peers in the community. Always bring a portfolio & hand out business cards like candy. 

Active job hunting

Apply to job postings online.

If interested in working with specific people at specific companies, you could send an email “I’d love to work with you, here’s my portfolio/relevant experience”, even if they aren’t actively looking for new hires. Be concise, and include a link to your work AND attached images so the person reading the email can get a quick preview before clicking for more. 

Twitter job postings can be pretty underpaid! Get a copy of the Graphic Artists’ Guild Handbook Pricing & Ethical Guidelines to know your rate. I once had a twitter post job listing email me back saying that other illustrators were charging less, and I quote, “primarily because they’re less experienced and looking for their first commission”. This was not okay! For reference, this was a 64-illustration book. The industry rate of a children’s book (~36 pages) is $10k+, and this company’s budget was apparently $1k. For all of it. 

Congrats you got a job! Now what?

Ask for like, 10% more than they initially offer and see if they say yes. If they do, great! If not, and the price is still OK, great! Often company budgets are slightly higher than they first tell you, and if you get this extra secret money, all the better for you. 

Make sure you sign a contract and the terms aren’t terrible (re: GO GET THE  Graphic Artists’ Guild Handbook Pricing & Ethical Guidelines) 

Be pleasant and easy to work with (Think ‘do no harm but take no shit’)

Communicate with them as much as needed! If something’s going to be late, tell them as soon as you know so they aren’t left wondering or worse, reaching out to ask what’s up. 

And if all goes well, they’ll contact you about more jobs down the line, or refer you to other folks who may need an artist, etc. 

Quick note about online shops/licensing and why they’re so good

It’s work that you do once, that you continuously make money off of. Different products do well in different situations (conventions vs. online, and then further, based on how you market/the specific groups you are marketing to), so products that may not do well initially may get a surge later on. 

Start with things that have low minimum order quantity and are relatively cheap to produce, like prints and stickers. 

If you are not breaking even, go back to some of the earlier portions of this and think about how you could tweak things as a small business. Ease of access is also very important with this; for example, if you only take orders through direct messages, that immediately shuts off all customers who don’t like talking to strangers. 

Quick resource that you could look through; it’s the spreadsheet of project organizing that I made a while back 

Licensing is when people pay you for the right to use your work on stuff they need to make, like textbooks or greeting cards. This is generally work you’ve already made that they are paying the right to use for a specified time or limited run of products. This is great because you’ve already done the work. I am not the expert on this. Go find someone else’s info.

“I am not physically capable of working much”/ “I need to pay the bills”

Guess who got a hand injury Sept 2020 that messed me up that entire month! I had a couple jobs going at the time that I was terrified of losing, but they were quite understanding when I told them I needed to heal. So:  Express your needs as early as you know you need them. Also do lots of stretches and rest your hands whenever you feel anything off; this will save your health later. Like, the potential of a couple months of no income was preferable over losing use of my hands for the rest of my life.

This continues to apply if you have any other life situation. Ask for extra time. Ask for clarification. If you tell people ahead of time, folks are often quite understanding. Know how much you are capable of working and do your best not to overdo it. (I am.. bad at this)

Do what MAKES SENSE for your situation. If doing art currently earns you less money than organizing spreadsheets, then do that for now, and whenever you have the energy, break down some of the tips above into actionable tiny chunks, and slowly work at em. 

The original ask I got in 2019 mentioned ‘knowing you’re not good enough yet’. Most artists experience imposter syndrome & self-doubt—the important thing is to do your best, and if anything, attempt to channel the confidence of a mediocre white man. If he can apply to this job/charge hella money for Not Much, then so can you! 

Check out this Art Director tumblr for more advice!

Danichuatico’s Literary Agent guide

Kikidoodle’s Shop Shipping Tutorial

Best of luck!

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Once again disclaimer this post is just the ramblings of a man procrastinating on other things that need to be done. I’ve Long Posted my own post so that it turns into mush in my brain if I try to read it, but I wrote this so I should know this content. If you got down here, congrats. Here’s a shrimp drawing.

Yee Ha. 

My reference post tag My tip jar