#(gotta organize this damn blog better)

[ticktockmyclockworkhart]

Hi there! I wanted to reach out and say that I've been a HUGE fan of the fics you've posted!! I keep coming back to Game Night (mostly because I'm trying to keep myself patient over Thus With a Kiss) because this is exactly what I've been looking for. I relate so much to Oz and I've probably got auditory sensitivity of some sort, and the part where Cal comforts Oz and grabs his headphones just hits so close to home. Like that's literally me!!! I'm really sad there's not nearly enough content for Technophobia (or for an explicitly autistic Oz, but that's a story for another day), and I want to thank you so much for contributing to the grand scope of the fandom. You're awesome! Keep it up!!

AHDHFHDJDGDHDJDBD THANK YOU,??????

AAAAAA??

It floors me you COME BACK to my fics, one thing, let alone all those kind words!! I have such low self esteem in my writing so that means a lot, even if I struggle taking words at face value, I’m really gonna hang onto this.

And THANK YOU for loving my Oz portrayal!! Autistic Oz? Why has the fandom been sleeping on that? I feel like the depiction of him as this innocent sweet smol bean who is hiding an all powerful eldritch deity with no mercy and is also ridiculously kinky and violent is just so. Everywhere. And sometimes I want that empowerment for my characters with canon anxiety. But sometimes… I don’t. And with Oz, I feel like keeping him grounded is the best thing for his character. He’s not without his monster quirks/abilities as the embodiment (or according to road trip, vessel?) of fear, but as someone who has all the problems I project onto him, sometimes I just want a character to not have so much in the supernatural power department and just overcome their own issues mentally in a slow, realistic way. Also Oz is legit me, like I’m convinced Beautiful Glitch was stalking me to make his character, we are so so very alike, the only thing that separates the two of us (besides one being a fictional monster) is our gender identities. He gets lavished with love whenever I write him!

I have mountains and mountains of unfinished fics with him and Cal at my disposal. Just tons, at least 20! Never posted since they never got finished, but they’re there.

And I’m sorry about the wait on Thus! Unfortunately, The Autism dictates I write by hyperfixation/whatever the interest is right now and though my love for Monster Prom remains unchanged, I can’t write anything good without the fixation there strong. I wish I could control it… I WANT to make monster prom stuff again!

I promise you I haven’t given up on Thus, not at all. ;)

It’s just the unfortunate way my writing and motivation works, topped off with a very busy school schedule…

But hey, anon, this really made my night. And to show you I’m serious about Thus, right after I post this answer I’ll post a preview! Chapter 5 isn’t even near done but it’s not without content! And I really want to at least show you some thanks for such a kind message.

And hey, if you ever want to hear about my unfinished drafts, messes that they are, I can always make some kind of scrapped/shelved project collection, too.

[yourtongzhihazel]

hello, are you under the impression that there is a non-capitalist economic system that eliminates the problem of powerful people exploiting the less powerful? Serious question.

Also, thanks for being a communist, and by that, I mean thanks for being a fascist. Don't worry, though, you aren't pissing on the graves of anyone who's been starved or killed by the systematic failures of communism to provide for the economic needs of those who live under it. Oh, and thanks for being a westerner, because I know you are! Just ignore all the oppressed people in eastern Europe and Asia who had to live through communism. You, who have enjoyed the high living standards brought about by capitalism and have known nothing but luxury that my immigrant parents wouldn't have dared dream of. What immense, staggering privilege you must be speaking from. I'm sure that privilege hasn't affected your perspective at all, though. But hey, you gotta know better than all those dirty immigrants who come to the west specifically for its liberal democracy and capitalism, right?

I'm going to stop insulting you and start being serious. Please reconsider your politics. Please reconsider your social circles. Please understand that just because someone says one good thing ("trans rights are human rights!") doesn't mean that everything they say is good ("Capitalism is killing us!") Please stop supporting communism, an authoritarian ideology that people are still suffering from. You could get out there and do some real good. Maybe serve meals to homeless people? I do that once a month.

are you entirely fucking serious

Do i have to wear a big fucking sticker that says "I am Chinese, my family and I have benefited greatly from communism"

How in the god damn hell can anyone see my blog and NOT see this? Should I change my got damn pinned post or something unbelievable.

Luxuries brought by capitalism? an economic system does no work. Who made those luxuries? Where did they come from? Who shipped it? Why did they make it ship it to where it went? Who bought it from who? Who sold it? The answers to these problems is found in political-economy. If you actually cared about where 79 cent bananas come from and why people from Latin America can only go to the us to escape their poverty, you would find that it is the united states who keeps Latin America in perpetual subjugation. Need I remind you that every single country (except Cuba) in Latin America is capitalist? Why are their failures not a reflection on the capitalist system to you? The "migrant crisis" is imperialism's chickens coming home to roost.

The extreme poverty rate in east Asia has fallen from 1 billion in 1990 to 25 million in 2019. Where did this poverty reduction take place? The People's Republic of China. In 2021, the PRC entirely eliminated extreme poverty within its borders. The PRC evaluates extreme poverty on a higher and stricter basis than the IMF or world bank uses so the number of people raised above poverty according to the CPC is LOWER than reported by western sources. One of the families who benefited from this poverty reduction? MINE. 800 million people raised out of poverty in the past 75 years. There are no bread lines in China. There is one in every city in america.

You want to know what I do? Im a union organizer. I worked with the DSA and the Teamsters to unionize Amazon. I am now working with the UAW as a union maid and recruiter for graduate students. Your band-aid solution of hunger does nothing to actually treat the root cause of hunger. Your understanding of politics and the economy is shallower than a puddle.

Start becoming more curious about the material causes of poverty and stop being a class traitor.

[tau1tvec]

On tumblr mobile if I hit someone’s icon it takes me to their page and I gotta scroll down which would take forever to see everything they posted &desktop has the pages?so how do I get the side view thing you mentioned?I feel like there was a post awhile ago that shows this for looking at your own likes page but it makes it easier to see everything …might actually have to quit sims sadly I can never be happy with it ;( finding cc is hell when it’s not just in one place &like why can’t there be a mod in the game ?for people to upload there cc into the game so nobody gotta waste time searching and downloading the cc like then ya could select which cc you want to even use and see all the cc created…

Idk, I don’t rlly mind clicking through the pages, bc I’ve been doing it for forever, and a lotta ppl prefer it over endless scroll on themes, so it’s pretty common to see when looking at someone’s actual blog.

Though truly, it sounds like you’re more fed up with looking for cc, than you are with tumblr’s UI, to which I do not blame you. I can’t stand it either a lot of the time, which is why finding a go-to ccfinds blog is so crucial to keep your sanity. EA doesn’t rlly give a damn to implement anything of that sort, let alone extend an arm to modders and mod users, bc if anything they just get blamed either way if something goes wrong, and with how buggy their games are I can’t imagine how swamped their help line is as it is. Plus, modding The Sims has been like this for a while tbh, it wasn’t much better and back then in my TS2 days, when everyone had their cc on obscure ass forums and websites that hardly worked, but at least it didn’t have the add on of subscription costs, and timed exclusives.

So go find you a ccfinds blog, preferably one with a rlly good tags system so you can sort out only what you need when you need it. Then get into the habit of checking it daily or weekly so you don’t miss anything, and then end up having to spend hours looking for it, and sending wcif’s. These blogs work hard to do a lot of the find it work for you, so send them a message showing your appreciation from time to time. ✌️

Either way, between all the searching, downloading, installing, and organizing, modding this game is a process, and a fucking miserable one, and I absolutely get why ppl just choose to go without it.

[darckcarnival]

Get To Know The Mun!

> BASICS! ♡

NAME: Spoop, Splat, D, Darck (peeps usually call my my main muses names except Spoop, I am the spoopiest.)

PRONOUNS: Any! I merely exist.

ZODIAC SIGN: Sagittarius/Capricorn

TAKEN OR SINGLE: Single but married to food.

> THREE FACTS! ♡

Have been writing since the 90's when I was a wee child. Did silly little roleplaying on mIRC, on some forums, and deviant art back in the day there after. Then became a fanfic writer for a while, followed by poems which I was quite good at back in the day. Then began making lyrics- figured nah, not for me. And flipped full circle back into roleplaying once more with some drabbles and maybe a one shot fic here and there. Have been writing ever since! So I have a LOT of history under my belt. And many of my muses have the same type of dedication and time behind them. Gotta put as much love into your character and writing, as if they were your own family. Make them feel alive.

Most art I do is either writing, 3D model modification items, or just with a mouse and keyboard art. I have been practicing more with a gifted tablet and pen, which has allowed me to do more detailed and serious mod work, such as mods for RE4 classic! But I am much better at texture, 3D, or coloring and shading. But heres the fun fact: i learned all my 3D and texture work skills through Second Life before anything else. And it's actually, funny enough, helped me bring muses to life as well as follow up on how to mod other games and go hog wild.

Been struck by lightning twice, fell down two different cliffs, hit by a semi truck, shot with a carbon arrow in the chest, stabbed, shot by bullet, and so on- and yet here I stand. Most of these events were completely accidental as well, and I walked away from. Honestly? I'm just a walking glitch in the matrix of the world, considering I also glitch every single god damn game I touch. THIS IS NOT A JOKE, NO MATTER HOW NEW IT IS, I BREAK IT.

> EXPERIENCE! ♡

PLATFORMS USED: AIM, Yahoo Messenger, DA chat, so many FORUM's back in the day. Skype, Discord, Tumblr.

PLOTTING / WINGING IT / MEMES: Geez, I can roll with just about anything. Plotting? Hell yeah count me in! Plots may not always follow the idea one hundred percent, but it absolutely makes for longer events and threads easily. Winging it? I do that all the damn time and can create so many unexpected events, as well as sudden character development. Twists and turns that just wing a rough idea into something wild. As for Memes and asks? Oh those can still form some really good interactions, character developments or knowledge acquiring moments. Sometimes these are one offs or long drabbles- but they can form into something longer and more serious. However, while I am down for all of the above-- I also have bad ADHD and writing can be hard, so it could take a while.

> MUSE PREFERENCE! ♡

GENDER: I can write just about any gender character, manage things in between or none. However I am more comfortable with female centric style muses. And yet, you put large men in my hands, and watch them go hog fucking wild. And don't even get be started on Robots or Monsters.

MULTI OR SINGLE: I have done both, but usually prefer single muse blogs. And yet I absolutely love my megaman multimuse to death! All my robot children and heathens there, so much work in my own verse there. So many thoughts. But multimuse blogs can still be difficult to keep organized with so much going on in the braincell, and with life being as it is, need to take breaks from it.

LEAST FAVOURITE FACECLAIM(S): Not sure what this means for least favorite here, does it mean people, or genre? I really don't mind one way or another. Especially when it comes to OC's, it's hard to find anyone who fits just right for people. And honestly I do not mind one way or another for people. If it fits someones muse, that's fine by me.

> FLUFF / ANGST / SMUT! ♡

FLUFF: THE GOOD SHIT HELL YEAH. I'm down for fluff so long as it isn't like... Hollow and forced. Fluff can be used as a great comfort option,. be it platonic, familial, friendly, or even romantic. Fluff can be used in so very many ways, and it's always an option withy me. But this can also turn into angst easily with my cursed hands, you have been warned. As well as comedic timing, since Darck needs to make a laugh to make herself comfortable. Darck has... problems.

ANGST: My bread and butter this one, much to the dismay of many of my friends who write with me. The muse on this blog is made of angst and pain and terrible events that have formed her into who she is. Angst can become violence, woe, heavy conversation, as well as venting- it's such a key part of development. There is a saying I quite enjoy: Muses are like geodes. Shiny, pretty, and in order to see what they are really made of, you must break them. I do admit however that I have a limit of how far I can go to a degree, with real life being a thing, but honestly? It takes a whole fucking lot to get there. And also maybe write angst too much and tragedy. Give this muse some better days.

SMUT: As much as I have enjoyed smut in the past, I haven't written such in a very long time, and am very careful of whom I write such with. Turns out I really good at smut according to others. And hey fun fact: People used to straight up pay me to write them smut of their characters and others of their choice. Haven't had that going in years but, it was a thing. However these days, writing smut with my muses needs to be more than just the event. It can be an opening for vulnerability, letting someone get close enough and trust them enough, that no one else really gets. Quiet and heavy conversations, the emotions involved. But if I ever do write it again, both my self and my partner need to be comfortable with writing such a thing. However if I ever did smut in a private drabble or fanfic, then all bets are off, because that's different. But far more rare.

Tagged by: @valour-bound

Tagging: You see this? IM TAGGING YOU. Do it.

[estelle-lee]

realization. - 11th August, 2023

uaeuehhhhhh good morning?

lmao it's 11:41 am. i woke up at 9:43 am sharp. spent one hour freshing up, cleaning and organizing and finally breakfast.

then i sat down to study and i just finished physics chap 2 mcqs, it took me 54 mins. it would take me WAY less time if i didn't have to do calculations in every fucking mcq lol.

anyways, it's still a reasonable amount of time even though i got distracted once in a while. i'll try more to not get distracted. i think my attention span is increasing more and more even with adhd, that's like a GREAT progress ^-^

tbh what was distracting me was bangchan's part in the super bowl mv lol. the first part so funny but addicting. reminds me of gordon ramsey's idiot sandwich meme 💀

i'll start physics chapter 3 mcqs now and then move on to general math.

---

bruh… again it took me 50 minutes to complete this chapter's mcqs cuz this one also had calculations in every fucking mcq… but i took less time this time, so it's a win-win hehe

finally i can start general math cqs lol, gotta finish it today at any cost!

---

i have a plan rn, i'm tired of doing physics' math for the past 2 hours, maybe i should switch up a bit rn and do the designs of my work today and write the blog post.

now that's a 2 in one benefit cuz if i do the this part of the work now then it would be a break for me AND it will take me EVEN LESS TIME to finish my work later.

lol i'm so smart that einstein feels embarrassed in front of me (～￣▽￣)～

leggo ヾ(≧▽≦*)/

---

eek! i did all work instead lol, now i'll just collect links after 7 pm, easy~

i'll fresh up now, have lunch, take a small nap (ok fr i'll take an actual small nap this time without that turning into 4 hours) and then start general, got a lot of time in my hand now hehe

---

fuck… we have over 000 pictures in google photos, now i have to transfer ALL OF THEM to a new account ugh… i've been doing this for the past hour, it's almost done… phew

maybe i can take a small nap after this…

FINALLY ಥ_ಥ

FINALLY i have backed up all photos into a new account, also did mine.

DAMN it was a fucking hard work. i deserve a nap now bro…

---

i didn't sleep but i took a break and relaxed, uplifted my mood and finished my work.

ngl i had the best laugh today in the past five years. this one video was so funny i saved in my google keep. i laughed loudly for 10 minutes non-stop. my belly is still hurting even after like one and half an hour lol.

i'm now listening some calming songs to wind down everything and start studying.

i feel so calm right now. i feel like everything happened till now happened for a reason.

like i had such a hard time finding work and earning money… knocking clients, working day and night, getting betrayed, faced a lot of scams, lost so much money and time… lost my grades too…

now look at me chilling with a job that only requires 2 hours a day and earning a solid income for my age. while my cousins who are like 15 years older than me are still studying… i'm here acing at my work…

i was so dirty minded and exploited back in class 9… i still feel disgusted recalling all the things i did back then… my grades went down… my mentality was low… my standards were low… the teachers hated me…ngl some of them still do.

but others have seen the good side of me, so they love me for my personality and talent… they unleash the best side of me, i love those teachers. i have been failing my classes since 9th grade after all that.

but now- now i will shine. i will shine brighter than the sun.

i am now prettier, stronger, better. and i will be smarter too. i'm studying hard to make an insane comeback. they will see the "me" that they have never seen before.

the people only knew me after covid because of how i had a glow up… only physically. they loved me for my physical beauty and chaotic exploited me back then…

i loved it too… i loved the attention i was getting for all the things i did… i felt like i was a "rebelious" girl… ew. i hate the past me. i hate what had gotten into me. i hate everything i did last year and i regret every.single.moment. of it.

but now i love myself. i have understood what self love is. i don't want attention anymore for things that aren't good, that aren't right.

i want to be the best version of me. classy, elegant, smart, pretty and beautiful. but i don't want to lose the chaos in me. i just want it combined with all the other good qualities :)

and i think i am getting closer and closer to my goal. i can do it. i'm gonna hit the goals like people hit the gym.e

everything really does happen for a reason.

if all the bad things didn't happen to me, i don't think i would be like this now…

i wouldn't try to improve, i wouldn't try to study, i wouldn't try to get the best grades, i wouldn't try to earn money and support my family. i wouldn't try to anything and live the most basic life possible.

but now i'm doing all of it. see? see me trying?

i'm gonna show all of you what a real glow up is. and i'll show you all how it looks like to be the best version of yourself. the version that everyone loves, the version I, MYSELF, love.

i'm going to show everyone…

i had to write all of this to lighten up my mind and to get the burden off cuz i don't have anyone other than myself to say all of these things to… i feel very light now.

i can finally focus on my studies again. i'll go study now <3

---

fuck it… 2 hours and 20 minutes to finish the general math chapter 6 cqs. geometry is fucking big and hard. but for some reason it was very understandable for me today. i got things quickly and easily. i also solved a few on my own. i guess i AM smart, i just didn't try in the past 2 years lol. i used to be THE topper before, i guess obviously for this reason. lemme have dinner and continue with the other two chapters. i HAVE to finish this today.

---

lmao i just realized i only had to finish general math chapter 6 😃

nvm it's nice, that means i have finished all the cqs of general math and i can continue with higher math <3

---

ugh ok i'm fucking sleepy rn, i did 3 higher math cq and i'm tired… total of 40 minutes… which means i studied a total of 5 hours today… i expected more but this is not bad either… i must finish higher math all chapter cqs tomorrow.

also i had a lot of fun while having dinner and blasting music and singing and dancing along. that was a good break. now i need to sleep.

good night <3 best of luck for tomorrow!!!

[octal-alchemist]

complaininh

hoping praying i can switch my schedule soon. spoke to my manager today, she said somebody on afternoons is quitting so that works for her. not quite sure who it is she means but, neat.

i keep having like. a daily fucking mental breakdown and i am not okay with it. even when I'm okay, my future feels like it has been stolen. i force myself to look at my goals, but they feel pointless and unsatisfying. nothing is good. i live only to talk to other people, but even that can hurt. I can't create right now. i barely want to.

I've been eating a lot, trying a variety of things, desperately hoping something will satisfy this emptiness. it's making me worse. I can't talk about food stuff with anybody though. or about drinking. just in general people in my life are so used to me being uptight, neurotic, and in control - if i mention im struggling w overeating or drinking theyre like "good :) you should eat more." "oh cool, you're drinking again, i missed drinking w you" like hun no... but i dont want to show them how bad it's getting.

these r people i get to see once every few months. so like. i can mask it to be like I'm doing things reasonably for the time we r together so they don't understand. they don't understand that I've been falling the fuck apsrt again. im almost to the point I wouldn't mind being hospitalized again. maybe i need intensive fucking treatment. idk!

my memory has been like a sieve too. every day blends. an ongoing nightmare with bright spots where i get to talk to people.

it's so stupid that I'm making good fucking money but I'm almost as miserable as when i was homeless. at least then i had fucking company.

i normally clean my house daily w a weekly deep clean but somehow it's gotten disgusting all of a sudden. I don't know when i stopped cleaning. I don't want to fix it. im just fucking hiding in bed n trying to brainstorm. how can i fix thisbhow can i fix me. I can't do this alone humans arent meant to be alone but my pride is so damn big. the shit I say constantly on the internet i would never say irl. but theres stuff ive been too scared to say on the internet too.

if i wasn't so scared of guns idve been dead two weeks ago. if i wasn't a coward I'd use the pills i got in march. i want to live though!!!! i really fucking do!!!! but this alone shit is unbearable. I don't even feel like a person. i feel so unworthy of life of living. everyone else seems to be so connected and i can't find my way in. whens the last fucking time i was held? when did i last feel loved? I don't want to chase people away with my insecurities so i bluff like i think im important to some people but its just. so fucking hollow somehow. when i die i will be forgotten in a week. i both want that and im terrified of it. but there's no point in staining someone with my presence after i can no longer see that and feel that so its better if everyone forgets. if this is just a natural thing. expected.

god though last time i tried to kill myself with pills that was so fucking awful and disgusting and they straight up told me it wouldn't have killed me anyway even if i hadn't been taken to the hospital and i dont want to risk failure again it was so fucking expensive anf ruined everu relationship i had for a long fucking minute

blogging shit helps me feel like i can survive, somewhat. reading stories helps somewhat. i feel a little of the love others place into their creative works and it sustains me. i remember that all of my feelings, even the emptiness, I'm sharing these feelings with everybody. but at some point art won't be enough. stories won't be enough. I can't do this forever i need fucking help. i need something to fucking change.

my pride is not that easy to break so im still gonna try and do it independently. idk. make some lists and timetables and organize my thoughts and wait for some fucking. motivation. force myself along because dawn will come.

gotta clean my damn house. figure out how I'll pay the dental bill, if I'm buying plane tickets or not. research local events, classes, costs, times. if it's all in a spreadsheet I'll use it. oh right, fix the room light that's sparking for some fucking reason, I've been lazy so i taped over the switch instead of doing anything. food, I've only got alcohol and desserts and my blood sugars been fucked. hh. this isnt a coherent list exactly but its a start. i have picked myself up before and from worse. and hey, i have some money saved. if i cancel the trip I could even go a few months without working.

n maybe i should just cancel that trip. in this state it would probably be a waste. but maybe ill be better in two months. maybe i need to get the fuck out of here for a bit.

wish I didn't have to make my own decisions

ok editing. i went out of my way to make this message annoying to read hard to get tobthe important point that's dumv of me this is a cry for help tbh . i know yall can't help. i know. im practicing for when i do it irl. but it does bother me that idk if this is read or not if this changes things. if you do read dropping a heart would be appreciated? gonna assume my measures succeeded and nobody read this otherwise

[themattress]

Gotta post this here since it’s not fit for the @khtrinityftw blog.

1.) It’s ironic that he brings up The Rise of Skywalker, since that film and this game were released at the opposite polar extremes of the same year (KH3 in January 2019, TROS in December 2019). As far as the comparison goes, I think KH3 works better as a game than TROS does as a movie, but TROS is the more appropriate ending for its saga than KH3. Here’s the difference: people hate on TROS because they don’t get Star Wars as it originated; people hate on KH3 because it doesn’t get Kingdom Hearts as it originated.

2.) Doug brings up a good point: KH3 won’t be viewed quite as negatively to a casual player who plays these games back to back - it’s really the core fanbase who had to wait for over a decade that feel particularly pissed off about the game. To wait for so long and build up so much expectations and then find out this was the best Tetsuya Nomura and Square Enix could come up with for an ending to the “Dark Seeker Saga”...I totally understand their pain.

3.) LOL @ his reaction when beginning to summarize the “story”. And he’s absolutely right - no amount of confusing details in KH and KH2 made their stories confusing on a fundamental level, since on that level you understood perfectly what the external and internal stakes were: save all the worlds from destruction while also saving your lost friends. With KH3, even if you played all the previous games or watched a recap video, the story makes no sense because its justification of “obtain the Power of Waking” is not understandable or compelling, least of all because what the Power of Waking even is isn’t ever defined. “Save all the worlds” isn’t even much of a factor anymore, since the Organization isn’t doing much of anything to them unless Sora’s around for them to taunt and Xehanort’s motivations and endgame are as nebulously defined as the Power of Waking is! It’s an epic failure on just about every level.

4.) His talk on the gameplay really all comes down to (as he later says) personal preference. I’m halfway on the matter, myself - I’m disappointed with the shallowness of the gameplay when compared to KH2′s, but it’s also really fucking fun especially with the game’s excellent level design, which is enough to make me not hate it and consider KH3 as one of the better games in the KH series from a gameplay standpoint (especially w/ Re:Mind attached).

5.) Yes, the game is beautiful to look at. There can be no arguments there.

6.) I did not enjoy most of the cutscenes where KH-original characters were talking; they are usually dreadfully boring and grind the game’s pacing to a halt. With that said, I also agree about the Disney movie recreation cutscenes and have since KH2. With a few exceptions, there is no reason to do a shot-for-shot remake of a movie scene in a KH game, especially since it will almost always suffer in comparison to the actual film (this game ironically pulled it off really well, but that kind of makes such scenes worse...it’s now so much like the movie that it makes you say “If I wanted this, I’d just watch the damn movie! KNOCK IT OFF!”)

7.) As horribly implemented as the Final World was in the story, his praise of it is spot-on. Clearly the developers were allowed to write their own stories about their own characters and put them into the game as the star spirits, and the glimpses we get of them are honestly a hundred times more interesting than the story we’re actually playing through as Sora!

8.) Going straight from KH to KH2 to KH3 creates such a whiplash when it comes to Disney world relevancy. In KH, they are all relevant to the main story in some capacity. In KH2, only half of them are relevant to the main story. And in KH3, none of them except Olympus are relevant to the main story, which only truly gets going after the last Disney world is visited. And lol, he actually points out that all the Organization members really do for the most part is pop up to say “nah-nah!” at Sora and then disappear. It’s so fucking stupid and tiresome.

9.) I actually thought the Gummi Ship system in this game was a perfect marriage of KH and KH2′s and quite enjoyed it....except when Gummi Ship boss fights became mandatory in order to enter worlds, which happened thrice. Those incidents were frustrating as Hell.

10.)  “Do you think they started out great and then turned to shit”?  YES. To a certain extent, anyway, like I said there’s a lot I enjoy about KH3′s gameplay. But my personal preference for an RPG video game - and for Disney and Square products in general given their histories and reputations - is for a good story and good cast of characters. And the fact that KH3 not only doesn’t have that but that it does so at the active expense of previous games that did have good stories and good characters is what prevents me from ever fully embracing it. Oh, and the sheer stupidity of what it sets up for the future of the series fucking cements that.

[1d-discourseoftheday]

Sun 24 Jan ‘21

Today, even more obviously than usual, literally everything is fake-- except Cliff's birthday which I have no reason to disbelieve! Happy 5th birthday to the good boyo Cliffy the dog!! Now onwards to the guys, who are very much working this weekend, even if that work is to pretend they Being Very Chill and Doing Chill Stuff.

A fan receipt placed Harry at Azoff owned LA restaurant the Apple Pan last night; there would be nothing at all odd about Harry eating food at a restaurant in the city where he currently is, or even choosing to go to one owned by his friends, but it's difficult not to side eye the location when the Azoff name is invoked, and sure enough! By morning rumors of him having been there with Olivia were circulating, along with a picture so blurry it could have been anyone, but sure- it would make sense if it was them. We all said the ridiculous insta follow would be followed by some more Very Casual and Private Holivia content we just Happen to see, and yep- it seems we're now firmly in (extremely ham-fisted) “make it look organic” territory, although if they think having an actual news outlet saying “it's DEFINITELY not promotional, just like if anyone was wondering if it's promo one thing it definitely is NOT is promo”, using a public blog to draw attention to a 'private' instagram account that has been known and publicly said to be Harry's for a year, or having the pair go for an outing to a restaurant OWNED BY THE AZOFFS are going to sway people from thinking this is laughably fake, WELL. Just call ME a news outlet cause I have a breaking story for them about how likely that is...

Zayn, who has been tweeting about UFC (and ONLY UFC) all this last year, has moved into doing more official spon-con for them, which I guess retroactively explains why he was publicly tweeting about just this one single thing. Anyway, he posted a blurry pic of swag they sent him, including a big ass prize belt (“the belt is a naughty little touch” uhh okay calm down) and later he tweeted about a fight. Niall also tweeted about the same fight (along with many golf related posts) and I never thought I'd think Niall tweeting about sports was anything other than from the heart but damn! Now I gotta ask, is he getting paid too? Meanwhile stans- “so is UFC football?” “no I think it's basketball...?” TBH not sure we're the ideal audience for this ad content lol, but get that coin boys! (I'm gonna be real with you guys, I thought it was boxing this whole time AND not a single one of you corrected me so we are no better over here: it turns out it's Mixed Martial Arts fighting!) Niall also posted a bunch of golf related things which I would never question his passion for but even so, that is promo too, for his golf management company. So a business day all around.

Zayn and Niall also let us know that we could look forward to, respectively, a Vibez music video behind the scenes which sounds really cool and I'm excited for, and a golf chat interview which, well as established I might not be the target audience for but I'm sure that will be... very cool... also?

[lifeaftermeteor]

Hey, I love your content and work for the GW fandom, and it's wonderful that you censored OP's url, but I don't think it's a great look to publicly vaguepost someone in a major tag where they'll probably see it, even if they did say something rude. Their post was rude, but it was *general*. Vagueposting most often targets one, specific person, and if it's easy to find their post (which it was), it can lead to them getting unduly harassed.

I sat with this for awhile this evening, considering how best to respond. I considered not responding at all. Yet here we are...

"Not a good look." You're right. The whole thing could've passed without anyone being the wiser if I hadn't capped it.

But...here's the thing. Pointing to the fandom (again, a 25+ year old fandom) and saying other fans themselves are "creepy and disgusting" and are "polluting" the fandom by making and enjoying content of the main characters and telling people to "go to hell" over adult content is not a vent about squicks. It is anti BS at its core and is fair game when you tag the whole damn fandom. That is inherently different from being squicked out by certain genres/content, or even complaining about the creative direction writers for canon/auxiliary content took the characters and their stories.

I know some have said I'm 'keen on neutrality' and that's true...in specific settings, i.e. I expect mods of fandom Discord servers or events to remain professional in that role and setting and stay above the fandom fray IN THAT SPACE. As a moderator, you have a responsibility to your community because you are providing a service and/or a platform to the fandom writ large. It's not your personal sandbox anymore, and you have to act accordingly there.

As an individual, I have personally spoken out against...

racism, bigotry, and other hate

fans who condemn others' headcanons and interpretation of canon

people trying to divide the fandom along shipping war lines of yore

unprofessionalism of mods and organizers

making assumptions about fans' IRL interests based on their fandom interests

anti rhetoric overall

I have also DEFENDED peoples' rights to have opinions in their personal spaces, even when it stirred up drama or other shenanigans. [NOTE: This includes both folks I disagreed with, as well as people I considered friends from whom I apparently caught a block from today. To each their own.]

Didn't see any of that offense or defense happening? That was intentional - sometimes you get better results with personal conversations when emotions are running high.

So I gotta ask you anon...am I not afforded that same right to a personal opinion and a personal stance on a personal blog? The OP tagged the fandom, so I tagged the fandom. Hell, I could've reblogged my opinions DIRECTLY from them (which I had actually considered this morning) but KNEW folks would pile on and I didn't want to drown their notifications in people being contrary. And I'll be first in line to fight off anon hate going to the individual if I hear about it 'cause that is also some shit I don't tolerate.

TL;DR -- if some rando on the internet can call a whole lot of us creepy and disgusting, then I - some other rando on the internet - can say that's a crappy attitude and it's got no space on my dash or in my fandom.

[incorrectlumityquotes]

FULL REVIEWS: “Covention”

I didn’t think I’d have a harder time doing these reviews on my days off than on a workday, but errands and all that. I had no expectations going into this episode at the time since “covention” is a fake made up word. But I heard Amity was going to be in it, so I got excited. The spice of life returns. It’s been a hot minute. Let’s see how the episode holds up.

The episode starts with one of my favorite cold openings. Super funny and gives a good shot at those books that have that pretentious flowery language. Seriously who says “thou” and “hast” anymore. Lame. Luz tossing King into the portal right when it closes was my favorite bit. Was Eda really going to go to the human world just for that? 

Also I didn’t notice until someone pointed it out but I guess they’re using Azura and Hecate as some kinda parallel to Luz and Amity. Hope Amity doesn’t find out that she’s not the Azura character. Does that mean that Eda is that old ass lady and King is that little fox dog thing? That’s not cool, man. Be nice.

So much can be read into it, but that’s for another blog post for another time.

And of course, dumb-dumb me had to wait until the word was said out loud to realize that it was a play on the words “coven” and “convention.” So basically it’s a con episode. Cov episode? Whatever. Big brain hurt.

Relationships are a give and take and sometimes you gotta give in. Sorry, Eda.

I don’t know about you guys, but I never really had a lot of fun going to cons. The only part I really liked was meeting my favorite voice actors and watching indie wrestling. All the food, merch, and art was always overpriced and from shows I don’t watch. I don’t join video game tournaments because those people take the games way too seriously. Plus the area that I live in isn’t known for being big on nerd culture so the cons are never that impressive. I met Steve Blum last time and went to one and you can only go down from there so I don’t think I’ll be going to another one any time soon.

I caught this first time I saw it on TV. Luz and Willow arm in arm. Maybe in another life I would be shipping Luz & Willow. Maybe maybe. Also, Skara in the background. I think her design is really cute. Maybe she’ll get an episode in season two. Maybe maybe.

More lore and more worldbuilding which people really seemed to want and we got it. Eda explains that while covens seem like cool groups to belong to, they also strip you of all the other kind of magic you can do. Why? My theory was (and is) that about fifty years ago a bunch of religious and political hustlers got together and tried to figure out a way to control people. Really keep them in line. They knew that people were basically stupid and would believe anything you told them, so they announced that this one guy could talk to the titan that the Isles were based of off. This one guys says that only he could talk to the titan and hear what the titan was saying and that only he could do all kinds of magic. Everyone else is doing it wrong and only he’s doing it right. With no proof or evidence, but trust him he’s on the level. The Boiling Isles was just doing fine before him, but now all of a sudden, we’re all doing it wrong. Let that be a lesson to you, kids. If anyone tells you anything like that, it’s bullshit.

Also the nine covens. Why nine? Why not group the bard and illusionary covens together into the music video coven? Why does potions get its own coven? How much school do you really have to take to learn to mix shit together and stir? Wouldn’t the plant magic coven know something about using plants to make potions? Why does the construction coven get it’s own coven? Couldn’t you use any kind of magic to build things? Is the construction coven the blue collar coven? Beast keeping gets it’s own coven? Like the bitch at the plant coven needs to switch covens to be told to feed her dog? My theory, the nine covens was really a marketing decision. Ten sounds too official. They knew that if it was too neat and tidy, they’d know something was up. Would they though? I don’t think so. 

Any group that has their own stormtroopers is automatically evil. Even more proof that the coven system is bullshit.

“Distraction spell!”

This moment made me laugh so damn hard. The crap that Eda pulls is one of the highlights of the show for me.

Luz and Eda go check out The Emperor’s Coven panel in the main hall, and we’re introduced to another major character. Enter Lilith, Eda’s older sister. And I swear to you guys, I was so confused this entire time on who was the older and who was the younger sister until the season finale. Seriously, I kept getting mixed messages. I mean, I know now but give me a break here.

I think Lilith is a good character and a great foil to Eda. The fun part is that since they are sisters, Eda knows exactly how to push her buttons and drag Lilith down to her level. It’s always fun to see a stoic character break. 

My finger points.

Amity shows up which automatically makes this episode better. Luz properly introduces herself and we get more back-and-forth. Amity being a real bitch here is more to mislead us for the last act of the episode, but when I first saw it I thought it was more confirmation that Amity was going to be the Draco Malfoy-clone of the series. Glad I was wrong.

We get more of Luz trying to make life play out like her favorite stories and challenges Amity to a witch’s duel. A thing she read in Azura that she has no clue whether or not is a thing in The Boiling Isles. There’s an equal chance that Amity could have just shaken her head and be like, “The fuck is a witch’s duel? That sounds like something you just made up.”

Also Amity should have caught that Azura reference from the start, but then that kinda would have spoiled Lost in Language, huh?

Again, Luz needs to learn that life does not play out like it does in her favorite stories. Challenging your rival to a duel is cool on paper but a big “Yeah no” IRL. Especially since she knows no real offensive spells, no defensive spells, is a weak nerd who has probably never been in a real fight in her life and has no fighting spirit. Trust me guys I learned the hard way. Life is not a shonen anime. You can’t settle anything by fighting. 

I love mentor/mentee stories especially when they have a rival mentor/mentee pair. Too bad Dana has already said that Amity and Lilith were not close at all. It was more a relationship of convenience. But then again that would help witch whole foil angle. Lilith and Amity just use each other to get ahead while Eda and Luz do actually build a familial bond. 

The duel goes...exactly the way I thought it would. Honestly. The cheating, the whole fight just breaking down, even Lilith and Eda doing an actual witch’s fight. Totally saw it coming. What I didn’t see coming was the bad ass animation they used for the Lilith/Eda fight and...

The Amity scene. The big reveal that Amity is not a Draco Malfoy clone (I only saw the first four movies). She’s just a girl who thinks people should follow the rules, hates cheaters and is under a lot of pressure to succeed. Only someone as empathic as Luz and try to keep building that bridge and try to make things right with Amity, but that’s a whole other episode.

.

And the episode ends with another great lesson I really like. “Will I ever be a true witch?” “I don’t know. What’s a true witch?” There are always expectations and pressure put upon you to be a true something. Others will want you to conform into a label for one reason or another. But all those expectations and labels are just illusions. It reminds me of a Bruce Lee quote. When an interviewer asked Bruce if he considers himself Chinese or American, he answers that he considers himself, “a human being.”

Labels can be fun because it makes it easier for the brain to organize things, but when people put too much stock into these labels problems arise. Think of labels as a boat to get you across the river. Once you cross the river you leave the boat behind. You don’t carry the boat with you. That’s just dumb.

“Witch please”

FINAL SCORE: 5 - Loved it.

Hot take, Amity makes every episode better. More funny jokes, more worldbuilding, more Amity and hints at the main villain of the show. Lilith was a great addition and the episode hints at the main plot. Probably the most fun I’ve ever had at a con. And speaking of more Amity...

[splashink-games]

My Top 2021 Games Played List

what better way to start the new year (and blog) by looking at everything I played last year🤔 and I played a lot in 2021 surprisingly. some of these I made a review on @splashinkling and some I just failed to talk about at all

let's start off with a few notables because I can't just talk about my top games and I need to babble about everything I played this year. these include games that I played but I wouldn't count as playing in 2021 (things like going back for the 100% and games I haven't finished) and also games that just didn't make it to the top 10

Valkyria Chronicles 1 - one of my favourite stories! but I played VC1 to achievement hunt this year and it was surprisingly fun to do everything calculatedly

Spiritfarer - another one that has absolutely amazing narrative and decently good gameplay that doesn't make it feel like you're ever wasting time! I really want to finish this game this year because they released the Farewell update and I'm super excited to see what I've missed since then

Battle Chef Brigade - a really really great game. underratedly good.

Hexecells series - wrote a review on this one, but again, great minesweeper style game. if you're a fan of minesweeper, this is it.

Octopath Traveller - just wow. it's a long game (which is why I didn't finish it). but no doubt it's a great game. fantastic writing. very refined art style and music.

Bright Memory - a solid FPS, which I don't play too often. pretty fun and short experience tho. best to learn how to dodge and parkour around the place

When the Past was Around - lovely little point and click puzzle game. I loved the art and the music. the story is also really sweet. one of the better story puzzle games I've played

Mary Skelter Nightmares - I don't want to talk about this game more than I have to. it's a meme to me (no offence to the game itself) and just a long game to play.

UNBEATABLE - gotta keep an eye on this rhythm game. it's not fully released yet.

here's some games that I didn't finish and don't have a strong opinion on:

Going Under

Iris and the Giant

Idol Manager

Godstrike

Crypt of the Necrodancer

Yakuza Kiwami

Othercide

Tales of Zestiria (well I do think it's not as good as Berseria)

As Far As The Eye

and here's some games that I did finish and don't have a strong opinion on:

Path of Giants

Little Big Workshop

Cats Organized Neatly

Tametsi

FRAMED Collection

Turnip Boy Commits Tax Evasion

Islanders

we're doing this in point form because this post is already damn long haha

10. Catherine Classic

great real-time puzzle game that makes you thinking in so many different ways while you're playing

the story's kinda suspect but it's not written poorly at least, just not a great vibe

9. Aer: Memories of Old

nice puzzle-platformer game with flying in between

also bird form is great and flying is actually really satisfying

very chill, very relaxing game

8. Dorfromantik

another chill game!

not really a puzzle game and more like one of those score attack games that makes you think

the style of the game is also *chef's kiss* amazing

7. Metal Unit

a solid action platformer roguelike

the pixel art is on point. the story is also pretty okay

the game gets easier once you have a loadout that you prefer/you've got everything unlocked (but that's not really a problem)

if I finished something like Dead Cells, it might've bumped Metal Unit off the list, but it didn't and Metal Unit deserves some recognition

6. Mini Motorways

you wouldn't think it, but I would definitely categorize this as an RTS (real-time strategy). also a score attack.

good lord if you don't have to think constantly playing and pausing

because just SPAWN IN THE RIGHT PLACE dear god if you put another yellow house next to the blue supermarket I swear-

5. Carto

my list has tons of puzzle games and this is another one!

map manipulation is so cool, Carto just felt like a new experience. maybe this mechanic was done before, but this one felt just right

also very well written and enjoyable story

4. Littlewood

I think my fourth completion of the year was Littlewood.

fantastic game. wonderful little life sim. no stress *at all*

lots of customizing things. would compared to something like Animal Crossing tbh. tho not real-time and Littlewood is my preferred experience

3. Florence

a short and sweet experience (about 30-60 minutes)

love the story. every chapter was so so good. this is what you play the game for.

the game itself is simple. not really a puzzle game. much more like a visual novel game with some interaction

especially liked the speech bubble section

2. Haven

fantastic RPG.

hug to heal<3

the story is fantastic and the banter between the two leads is masterful. the arcs they have to go through are so well paced and written. if you love narrative in games, this is a must-play

other than that, gliding around is enjoyable, if not a little finnicky

the battle mechanics are interesting, also finnicky. but also very different and I liked it. wish I could target tho instead of manipulating my actions to target

the music also pretty great if you like that lo-fi style

1. Hollow Knight

okay I'm probably a little biased about this at the moment. I just did a 4-hour speedrun of the game to grab some easy achievements but oh boy

this game is fantastic. great metroidvania. top tier all around.

the music, the art, the bosses, the sparsely sprinkled story that you have to piece together. absolutely amazing experience

both the first time I played this and recently, I switched between this and Celeste. and holy those two games could not be any more different control-wise. which is why I struggled so badly the first time (which caused me to leave it alone for a year to which I regret)

oh also colosseum 3. I'm a fool so it won't let me win the fool cup.

[winchesters-favorite-girl]

Flatline-Part Nine

A/N: Jensen and his sixteen year old daughter get into an argument before she goes out for a night with some friends. A few hours later, Jensen gets a call that is going to change his family’s life forever.

Word Count: 2,087

Warnings: Swearing, hospital setting, suicidal ideation

Masterpost

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“Hi honey, how’re you feeling today?” Your nurse Jenny asked as she walked into your room. Shrugging your shoulders you continued to stare at the TV as she looked at the monitors you were hooked up to before adjusting the fluids you were being given.

“When can I get breakfast?” You asked quietly, still not making eye contact with your favorite nurse. 

She let out a quiet sigh, “You’re having what should be your final surgery today, they’re gonna place the rod in your right leg and put some screws in your left ankle so that they should be in working order for you once you start to walk again.” She said with a forced smile, she knew how much you hated surgeries.

You let out a groan and laid your head back on your pillow so that you were looking up at the ceiling, “If I can walk again.” You reminded her, “I have so much metal and scar tissue in me that I probably won’t be able to walk again, remember?” 

Jenny gave you a playful glare, “I remember that the dumb intern stated his inexperienced opinion near your door during rounds one day, which I yelled at him for by the way. They wouldn’t be doing all these surgeries and putting you through this if they didn’t think you had a chance.”

“Agree to disagree.” You told her before turning your attention back to the TV but stopped yourself and whipped your head back to look at her, “They’re gonna intubate me again, aren’t they?”

Jenny gave you a sad smile which you couldn’t help but groan at, “I’ll be sure to have ice chips ready for you and grab you some ice cream from the cafeteria.”

“I hate those god damn tubes.” You replied.

“Language missy, and I know you do, but remember, this should be the last time. No more surgeries after this.” She said before looking at the clock, “Surgery is in two hours, want me to do your hair?”

A small smile broke out on your face, “Can I have braids?” You asked quietly.

“Of course.” She beamed at you as she grabbed the hairbrush and small hair ties she needed.

“Any idea where my dad is at?” You questioned as she finished up your hair.

“I think the doctors wanted to speak with him this morning before surgery, he should be back here soon.” She spoke right before someone knocked on the closed door.

“Knock, knock.” Your dad’s voice rang into the room.

“We were just talking about you.” Jenny told him as she moved the curtain in front of the door, “Just finishing up our girl’s hair. Wanted to have it all pretty for her final surgery today.”

“And it looks amazing, as usual.” He said, entering the room and placing a kiss on your forehead, “How you feeling today kiddo?” He asked, pulling a chair out to sit next to you.

You shrugged your shoulders, “Kay, ready for this to be over with I guess.”

“I know sweetheart,” Jensen said, giving your hand a squeeze, “But the good news is I just spoke with your doctors, they’re gonna do a CT first to see how everything in your body is doing. Make sure no brain bleeds or anything are happening, see how your organs are doing and healing after the bleeds you had during the accident. Also gonna check on your bones and how they’re healing. Then they’re gonna do the surgery on your ankle, place those screws and the rod in your leg. After that, no more surgeries.”

“Promise?” You asked, sticking your pinky out to your father.

“Promise.” He replied, locking his pinky with yours. “The bad news is that in about three days we’re gonna be moving to another unit.”

You furrowed your brows, “Whaddya mean?”

“He means you’ll be leaving me.” Jenny told you, a sad smile on her face. “You won’t need to be in the ICU anymore, so you’ll be heading to a step down unit.”

“Jenny can’t come?” You spoke sadly. She had been your nurse since the second day you were in the hospital and had become extremely close with your family.

“Sorry hon.” She replied, giving your hand a squeeze before heading to the sink in your room, “I only work in the ICU, but don’t worry, the nurses on the step down unit are pretty awesome too.”

You let out a sigh, “I wish she could come with me.” 

“I know sweetheart, me too; but once you move to that unit they’ll start doing some therapy and we’re hoping that in two weeks you’ll be able to go home.” Your dad said, a huge grin on his face.

You looked at him in shock, “I-I get to go home soon?”

Jensen nodded his head, “We’re already starting to get things ready for you. You’re gonna have to stay on the first floor for a while but we’re gonna make it easy for you to get around and have all the food you’ve been craving waiting for you.”

You let a watery chuckle, “Okay, one more surgery. New unit. Therapy. Home. I can do that.”

Jensen couldn’t help but tear up at the sound of hope in your voice, you’d been in the hospital for five weeks and have been miserable most of the time; but now, now you were smiling and he could see a glimpse of his daughter from before the accident. 

“You ready to head to CT?” Jenny asked, turning to look at you. “Transport is here for us, we’ll head down, then come back up here to prep you for OR.”

“Sounds good.” You told her, a brightness in your eyes she hadn’t seen before.

“Well alright then, give her the good luck kiss Mr. Jensen and we’ll be on our way.”

“Ow.” You whispered as you slowly moved your hand to your neck.

“Morning sunshine.” Jenny’s voice spoke softly as she grabbed your hand before you could touch your neck. “Open your mouth, I have some ice chips for ya.” She told you as she lifted a spoon to your mouth which contained two small crushed pieces of ice. “Suck on those for a minute hon. Here Mr. Jensen, can you give her more when she’s ready?”

“Course.” Jensen replied in a serious tone, giving your hand a squeeze.

You opened your eyes a little, the lights were dimmed and the door was shut, making it extra quiet, “How’d it go?”

“Surgery was perfect.” Jenny stated., “Now we’re just gonna focus on keeping you comfy for the rest of the day, maybe grab you some ice cream and jello in about an hour if you’re up to it.”

“Always up for it.” You smiled at her, “Besides, gotta let you spoil me while you can, a few days from now I’ll be someone else’s problem.” You joked, but the smiles on Jenny and your dad’s faces dropped with your words, something you noticed quickly, “What is it?”

Jenny shot your dad a look, “I’m gonna go chart your vitals, I’ll be back soon with your snack.”

As she left the room you quickly looked at your father for answers, “What is it?”

Jensen gripped onto your hand, “Sweetheart,” He sighed out.

“What dad?” You asked, confused at what was happening.

“The doctors read your CT while you were in surgery.” He told you.

“Okay….and? That’s what doctors do.” You replied.

“I know honey, it’s just-everything looks good, better actually than they expected.” He stated.

“Isn’t that a good thing?” You questioned.

“Yeah babygirl, it’s really good. You’re healing a lot faster than expected which is a positive sign.” He informed you.

“Then what is it?” You pushed, “Cause you look like someone died.”

“Honey…” Jensen braced himself for what he was about to say, “The CT showed a lot of scar damage on your spine, they’re-they’re gonna have to do another surgery to remove some of it and place some screws in order for you to have a chance at walking again. They gotta wait for you to heal some from this one so it’ll be about a week, then they’ll do the surgery but you’re gonna be in the ICU for about another two weeks, maybe more.” 

Jensen watched as the tiny flame in your eye that was there this morning died out as you looked at him with tears dropping onto your cheeks. You didn’t say anything, you didn’t have to.

5 Days Later

“Hey honey,” Your dad spoke into the phone leaving a voicemail for your mother, “They wheeled her up a few minutes ago and are getting her comfortable in the room. Doctors said everything went great but they had to take out more than planned, she’s gonna be in a lot of pain so we probably shouldn’t have any visitors other than you and me the next few days. I gotta go, Kristen is waving at me, I think Y/N is waking up. Call you later, love you.”

Jensen quickly hung up the call and sped to your room, where one of the other nurses you had often, Kristen, was standing at the entrance while Jenny stood near the machines you were connected to, pushing different buttons on them.

“Give me just a second honey, I’m working on making it better. If it doesn’t help I’ll give you a push of fentanyl to make it stop.” Jenny told you, trying to comfort you the best she could.

“Hey babygirl, you okay?” Jensen asked, nearly smacking himself in the head for asking such a stupid question.

You looked over at your father the best you could, your neck was in a brace to try to keep you as still as possible. Tears were pouring down your face as you tried to calm yourself down. “I-it-it hu-uu-rts-s s-s-o bb-aa-d.” You puffed out, as you began to hyperventilate. 

Jensen grabbed onto your hand, giving a squeeze before he put his hand on your forehead, moving some of the stray hairs that had fallen from your braids out of your face. “I know sweetheart, Jenny is doing what she can to make it better. It’ll be better soon, I promise.” Jensen placed a kiss on your head, wishing he could do something to help you.

“Yy-ou prom-ised n-n-o mm-ore s-s-ugeries.” You started to sob.

Your dad saw Jenny rush out of the room, likely to grab you pain medication and he felt his heart break, “I know I did sweetie, and I’m so sorry, but this was the last one. Okay? No more.”

“I-I don’t believe you.” You told him, tears continuing to pour from your eyes.

Tears started to form in your father’s eyes, “I’m so sorry sweetheart.” Jensen whispered, not knowing what to do.

“Why do you keep doing this to me?” You spoke in a broken tone, “You keep putting me through these surgeries. And for what? Nothing? I’m not gonna be able to walk again. I won’t be able to play basketball. My life is done. Just let me go.”

Jensen looked at you confused, “What’re you talking about?”

“I’m talking about this!” You shouted in a hysterical voice, “These surgeries are all pointless! They’re not helping, they just keep adding more problems to me and make everything hurt! I don’t wanna hurt anymore Daddy, just make it stop.” You sobbed, “I want it to stop, I don’t wanna be here anymore! Make it stop. Make it stop!”

Jenny walked in and froze for a moment at the scene she walked in to but was quick to move to your IV so she could give you the pain medication you needed, “It’ll stop hurting soon hon, you’ll fall asleep but it won’t hurt.”

“Daddy please, make it stop.” You begged.

Jensen continued to grip onto your hand, “It’ll stop soon babygirl, I promise. The pain meds are kicking in and you’ll pass out soon.”

You stared at your dad as silent tears fell, you felt the medicine starting to pull you under and your hold on your father’s hand started to loosen. Jenny looked at the monitors, seeing your blood pressure and heart rate start to drop, showing the medication was working.

“I wish the car had killed me.” You mumbled, looking straight into your dad’s eyes, “It should have killed me. I’d be better off.” 

Jensen stared back at you, tears falling as he heard your words and Jenny grabbed onto your other hand.

“I wished it had killed me.”

Next

(Text divider by @writeyourmindaway)

[whorefordazai]

Taking responsibility fyi me apologizing

So around the beginning of March I found Rai's blog. I decided to interact with her blog after she reblogged a post saying that she doesn't mind if we interact with her. At first it was leaving simple messages like " Damn papa, you a rare breed, no comparing And it's motherfuckin' scary Tryna keep him 'cause I found him Let a hoe know I ain't motherfuckin' sharing....." and "gotta blast⛷⛷⛷⛷". But then Hua asked for anons so I sent her "Gu-Gucci flip flops, fuck it, hit your bitch in my socks This a big watch, diamond drippin' off of the clock Pull the 6 out, wintertime, droppin' the top Give it to they pussy ass, turn the shit up a notch Gucci flip flops (fuck it), make it kick rocks (bust it)This a big clock, check the wrist watch (check it) Gucci flip flops, fuck it, hit your bitch in my socks👺👺👺". After that I decided that it would be fun to stir shit up. So here's a list of all the things I've done:

• Odasaku's orphans 💥 jokes

• Repeat random words like "bestie I don't feel so good bestie I don't feel so good bestie I don't feel so good" and "sleep slept sleep slept sleep slept sleep slept sleep slept sleep slept sleep slept"

• Simped over the seggsy commander Erwin Smith

• Sent you aot tik toks and sent Hua tik toks that may or may not have traumatized her

• The Thanos situation. Yes I was the one who asked if Thanos had a big dick and wanted the pic (I've changed. I'm a better person now)

• Said that if you had a dick that I'd put it in my mouth (I don't regret saying that I would do it)

• Said that Thanos cum probably taste like battery acid

• Sent "🍆🍆🍆🍆" to Hua's blog

• Asked for a cup of cum from Miche's blog (yes I am the cum anon and I am sorry)

• Said that the avatars are packing (yes they are. Those blue aliens can still get it)

• Said that papa smurf can get it(I have grandpa issues)

• Gave an apology that I was very proud of "I've been reflecting and I am very ashamed of myself. I wanna apologize to all of you for what I did, it was very wrong, and I am very sorry, I just would like to move on and lead a normal life you know get a job and a wife and change my ways and I hope this apology impresses you even tho my grandma made me do it and I don’t really mean it"

• Brought up that Isayama has a hair fetish

• Rated thanos dick a 7.5/10

• Said this about the Thanos cock "It's not a bad dick. Would I suck it? No. Would I ride it? No. But it's still a decent cock. 🍆"

• Admitted to being a chrollo stand and having an obsession with cum (I'm serious y'all pls be careful with what you joke with)

• Simped for bucky barnes metal arm (he's hot. Hua agrees I think)

• Told Miche to look up Rule 34 papa smurf on Miche's spam (I'm sorry about that)

• Sent a YouTube video of Hikaru and Kaouru to Hua's asks (I think it traumatized her)

• Asked if you wanted to be twins so we can be like hikaru and Kaouru

• Asked to have a fist fight with me and then later asked you to fist me (that was a joke pls don't)

• Oh I'm 👣👣👣 anon too. It started off as a joke to bother Hua but it stuck around

• Asked you to be the yoonbum to my sangwoo and then said you gave off switch vibes

• Barked at you

• Rai NSFW headcanons (still waiting for those I'm jk unless👀)

• Said I liked fingers in my mouth and somewhere else

• Sent "How to make rai fall in love with me" and shit like that to annoy Hua

• Simped over muscular oda (Hua did not approve)

• Told you I was sending you to the ranch

• The shrek thing and the shrek rule 34 and said his cum was swamp water and rai x shrek(I'm genuinely sorry for that one)

• Told you I was going to eat you out because you deserve it

• Flirted with you

• Simped for Zazu the bird from the lion king (I'm sorry)

• Asked rai to become my slut but ended up becoming her slut

• 🍑💨

• Asked Rai to dom me

• Asked Rai to peg me/srs 😐

• Informed you that Levi has a shit kink

• Mich x Rai x Hua x Me 👀

• Ate Hua several times

• Threatened to harvest your organs

• Hua feast

• RIP hua

• And bringing up Hua's attempt at flirting

• I've probably done a lot more and I'm sorry

Anyways I'm admitting to all of this because I'm probably going to delete my account soon and I wanted to apologize to everyone💀 I'm really sorry y'all but I had a lot of fun

YOOO I WAS READING THIS LIKE 😨😱😯😦😨

PLEASKEKE HOWJSKWJ I DONT HAVE ANY WORDS EXCEPT I LOVE YOU AJAJ🤪🤪 BESTIE AHHH CHAOS I LOVE IT SHWJ YOUVE MADE THIS BLOG SO MUCH MORE FUN AJAHAH🥰✨🤪😦

WAIT if you’re gonna delete your account soon, does that mean you’re leaving tumblr or are you just gonna make a new account 😰⁉️DONT LEAVE ME😩😩

@hanazou @dazaicafe COME SAY HI 🤪

[liliesoftherain]

Ground Zero reads Thirst Tweets

A/N: Hey guys, this is a collab with @pinky-the-elephant-room​ !! This is the first part, and the second part can be found here! Her part is NSFW so since i’m a SFW blog we thought it would be best to split the parts! So here’s my contribution! 

Pairing: Bakugou Katsuki x Reader

You walked inside the studio, thanking the heavens that it was cooler than it was outside. Greeting the producers of the setup, you gladly made your way by the set to see two stools placed side-by-side in front of a blue backdrop. 

“Hello, Seize-san! Thank you so much for coming in today, I am Hana and I’m here to help you through this!” You grinned at the young woman who walked up to you. She was short stature and plump figure and gave off the impression of a warm and welcoming personality. Instantly putting you at ease.

“Thank you so much for having me! It’s an honor to be showcased here, along with another hero! You guys are truly kind to grant the opportunity to work alongside you, and please, call me (l/n).”

She nodded enthusiastically, grinning at the praise from such a top hero as yourself. 

“Thank you again, (l/n)-san, come let’s get you ready for the camera! Are you in need of anything to drink, anything to snack on?”

“No ma’am, I am fine! I’m just ready for the shoot!”

“As is your partner!”

You both shared a laugh, both knowing the person you were recording with today was the opposite of ready for this.

“Oh, I’m sure that is the case, ma’am, where is he by the way?”

“He’s right behind you, stupid.”

You turned to see the annoyed blonde behind you, being escorted to the seating area close to where you were being led.

“Ah Ground Zero, good to see you haven’t blown anything up yet.”

“Shove off, hurry up so we can get this over with.”

You laughed, waving him off as the members looked on with concern.

“Don’t be rude, Bakugou! I’ll be there with you soon enough; all you have to do is be good and wait for me.” You winked, eyeing him up and down before turning back around, allowing Hana to guide you off towards your station to get ready. 

The makeup artists just refreshed your makeup and made you ready for the video. You came out of the dressing room, dressed in your usual hero costume but looking less like you’ve been running through the streets of Tokyo. Bakugou was in usual costume but without his hand gauntlet. 

 “Okay you two, we’d like to thank you for taking the time to come on set and do this showing. These tweets are real, and we just want your genuine reaction from them! We’ll try to limit the cuts to be able to ensure that real response, and don’t be afraid to let loose! These are Thirst Tweets for a reason!”

You laughed along with everyone else, except Bakugou who looked a little annoyed by the entire thing. You gave him a slight shove with your shoulders, biting your lip subtly as his gaze locked onto yours. 

“Cheer up already, this is supposed to be fun. What, do you not want to be here with me?” 

“That’s not--Shut up, shitty woman. Just get ready.” he huffed, glancing away from your stare as he mumbled back.

“Okay, starting in 3, 2…,” The cameraman pointed instead of saying one, signaling the tape was now rolling. You beamed at the camera, working your charm as you gave a little wave.

“Hi, guys! I’m, (l/n) (y/n), or better yet, Seize!”

“And I’m Bakugou Katsuki, Ground Zero.”

“And today we’re reading…,” you trailed off, looking expectantly at your partner.

“Thirst Tweets.”

“You could be a little more enthusiastic you know.”

“Oi, shut it!”

You giggle, looking deviously at the camera before swiping his mug-shaped container.

“Oi, what are you-”

“Let’s see what people are saying about our dear Ground Zero, hm? That’s alright with everyone else, right?”

The crew joyfully agreed at the twist, and with their approval, you shoved your container in Katsuki’s chest.

“All right, let’s see,” You snorted, slapping Bakugou’s shoulder as you read the first tweet, “‘I would love to be able to rip that Hero suit right off of Ground Zero and rub my face along those God-like abs. Can a man be any hotter!? Have you seen his moobs!? *dROOLING*”

“Ha!?” Bakugou looked at the tweet with narrowed eyes before looking back at the camera, “Do you know how expensive this hero suit is!? You ain't ripping shit! Plus, what the hell are moobs?”

“Oh Bakugou, half of the world's population would love to rip that suit off, myself included. Plus, those are your man boobs, and they are absolutely correct, you have the best titties I have ever seen!” You winked at the camera while throwing the paper over your shoulder, “NEXT!”

You gave your bucket a good shake, making eye contact with the confused blonde who was still stuck on your last comment.

“‘Y’all don’t understand what I would do just to have @GroundZero to choke me with a gloved hand. Or do anything to me really. He could hit me with his car, repeated use his quirk on me, give me paper cuts all over my body and throw me into a pool of lemon juice, and I’d beg for some more like yes zaddy **** my ***** up!,’ OH MY GOD.” You used one hand to hold your mouth in amusement, putting the bucket between your thighs so you could show the tweet with your now free hand. 

“You have some pretty kinky fans, Bakugou,” you teased, waving the paper in his face as he grabbed your wrist to hold it steady, staring in disbelief.

“You all are disgusting, why in the fuck would anyone do that to you? Let alone me, who the hell do you think I am!?”

“I mean, you can’t judge, can you?” 

He snaps his head to look at you, a heated glare on his face.

“The hell, of course, I can judge! These people want me to torture them, sick bastards.”

You laughed as Bakugou sucked in a sharp breath between clenched cheeks, you were thoroughly enjoying his discomfort. 

“NEXT!” You shouted, crumbling the paper and tossing it at Bakugou.

“How many of these are there?” He sighed, looking in your bucket in his hands and shaking it around.

“With the way you look there are bound to be a ton.”

“What-”

“‘If I were only able to take just Ground Zero’s jaw out on a date, I’d never be happier’ Oh that one isn’t so bad-”

“My jaw? What the hell-” He looked over your shoulder, reading the tweet.

You looked up and stared at the blessed jawline.

“That’s what it says, but I gotta disagree,” You grabbed his arm and squeezed it while smirking deviously into the camera, “These arms are better, I’d take these bad boys out for coffee over his jaw any day.”

Instead of shaking you off, you swore you felt Bakugou flex slightly under your hold and couldn’t help the shit-eating grin that overtook your face as you stared up at him through your eyelashes.

“Are you flexing, Ground Zero?”

“HAH!? NO WAY, READ THE NEXT DAMN TWEET AND GET OFF OF ME ALREADY.” He snatched his arm from your hold as you waved him off, grabbing the last tweet from the container.

“Aw guess there weren’t as many as I thought, we’re already reaching the end-”

“Good because I’m tired of these wackjobs.”

You scanned over the paper, unable to contain yourself as you busted out laughing. You knew Bakugou was glaring at you, but you couldn’t help it, you almost fell off your chair, having to once again grab his arm for support.

“This, I just- Oh my God, Bakugou you’re-HA!”

“Can you knock it off and read it before I blow your ass up!” He hissed at you, and you knew you shouldn’t have made the situation any worse than it was- but sometimes you can’t help yourself.

“Damn, I mean if you really wanna tap this ass Bakugou, how can I say no~?”

He growled lowly, glaring harshly at your face as you only winked in response. 

“Watch it, (l/n)-”

“‘Ive always been straight BUT i wish ground zero would rip me apart like he did to tht one moth villain, n after tht I have literally never questioned my sexuality so hard, I would let tht man bury his **** so far inside my *** tht i become the Queen of the f**king gays, all hail to me, GZ’s b**tch.Thts it. Thts the tweet.’ HAA.”

You felt Bakugou tense beside you, and when you looked over you saw him shaking in anger.

“Oh what, it’s charming!” You slowed your laughter down to measly chuckles, catching your breath as you were wiping tears from your eyes.

“How is that god damn charming!?” He seethed.

“You know, I can see it.”

“See what?”

“You being gay-”

“HA!? WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU THINKING.”

You look back to the camera and give an innocent shrug.

“He could've fooled me, I swear I saw him checking out Deku a few missions back-” A small explosion cut you off, and you rolled your eyes.

“So dramatic, it’s no big deal. I check out Deku all the time too.”

“You fucking what?”

“Oh yea, I mean I check out Shoto too but Deku’s got a cute ass. What can I say-”

“You’re fucking pathetic.” He huffed, snapping his gaze away from where you sat.

“Sorry, was I overstepping? I’ll leave your man alone!” You teased, poking his thigh as you did.

“Goddammit (l/n), I’m not fucking gay for Deku!” He swatted your hand away, scooting as far away as he could from you.

Which wasn’t very far, seeing as he made no effort to move the stools away from each other.

“So you’re gay for-”

“NOBODY!”

“Okay okay!! Just read my tweets already, I know they’re getting antsy watching us just talk about your closeted sexuality!”

“...tch.” 

You could practically see a vein popping out of his neck, and even though you were sure he was picturing murdering you in his mind, you couldn’t help but think of how sexy it was.

You watched as he unenthusiastically pulled out a piece of paper, bored eyes scanning till they narrowed.

“You’re fucking fans are worse than mine.”

“What! Read it, I wanna hear!”

“Do I have to-”

You cut him off with a sharp look of your own, wearing him down until he sighed and did as he was supposed to. 

“‘I would pay any amount of money, or literally give up any organ-appendix, spleen, gallbladder, lungs, my damn heart, just so Seize can spit on my face and call me a worthless, good-for-nothing loser, then kick my body and walk away. It would be my honor and my greatest life accomplishment.’” He threw the paper in front of him as if it were burning his skin, once again staring at the camera in disgust.

“Wow,” You giggled, “I don’t even know how to respond. I don’t really think that’s worse than yours Bakugou, but thanks I guess?” 

“Thanks!? That’s all you’re going to say? How about I kick your ass and call you a worthless shithead myself, would that turn on all you perverts watching this, ha!?” 

You smacked his arm playfully as you tried to get him to calm down, but his heavy breathing was an indication he wasn’t having it.

“I’m sure it would-,” His head whipped to face you and you clicked your tongue at his behavior.

“Oh, c’mon don’t be a prude, these are juicy and I for one wanna keep hearing them! So, hurry up and read another one before you blow a gasket.”

“Whatever, this is fucking stupid.”

“Alright stupid, just keep going.”

He side-eyed you, grinding his teeth together in what you assumed was to hold back even more vulgar insults.

“‘Don’t kink shame me..’” Bakugou paused, a long sigh coming from him as he reluctantly continued, “...’Don’t kink shame me but it’s my goal in life to die by @Seizes thighs. Her thighs are so strong but soft looking and I swear they can crush me in an instant-’”

“Ohh that’s true. These can crush anyone.” You slapped your thighs for emphasis, a cheeky grin playing on your lips.

“Are you seriously proud of that?” He deadpanned at your joyful expression.

“Uh, yeah? What, a woman can’t be proud of her thunder thighs of steel! You're just jealous you’re not being crushed by these babies.”

“Why the fuck would I be jealous!?” 

“Cause I have amazing thighs that any man would love to be in between-”

“Next fucking tweet,” Bakugou cut you off, “‘I will eat Seize ass with a spoon, be havin’ that as breakfast, lunch, and dinner n never get tired.’ Okay but seriously what the hell is wrong with you people? With a damn spoon?”

“It’s flattering almost, don’t you think? I would be their favorite meal that they never get tired of,” You look to the camera and wiggle your eyebrows, “I mean I don’t know if I’m down for that, but if you wanna snack sometime, link up with my manager-”

“Absolutely not, don’t give these perverts any more fucking ideas.”

“Okay, dad.”

“Quit being a damn brat and just accept that these are weird and not cute, for fucks sake!”

You look to the crew behind the camera, bowing your head a bit as you spoke.

“Sorry, you’re going to have a lot of bleeps because of this big lug.”

“DON’T IGNORE ME-”

“Read the next tweet,” you extend your words in a whiny voice, “I wanna hear what else people think about me!”

You watched as Bakugou clenched his hand before relaxing, reaching inside to pull out another folded paper.

“‘@Seize is the best ever. Strong and compassionate, honestly my favorite hero by far. She’s giving the other pros a run for their money, good job and keep it up!’. Tch at least we’re done with the weird ass shit. ”

“AWHHH, you guys are so sweet! I don’t know how I match up to other heroes-”

“Tch, she matches up just fine-”

“Well, if we’re talking about boobs, especially if you compare mine to yours, I don’t stand a chance!” You reached a hand over while your body was still facing the front and squeezed one of his pectorals. 

“YOU HAD TO TURN THIS INTO SOMETHING FUCKING STUPID, DIDN’T YOU!?” He jerked away from you; eye twitching as he took ragged breaths.

“What, just stating the truth. Now, c’mon if we had the same number of tweets then this should be my last, why do I have to drag these out of you?”

“Shut the hell up,” He picked out the last piece of paper as he tossed the bucket on the ground, ignoring the way you complained about it. “‘Got damn,’ Holy hell I’m going to lose brain cells, ‘Got damn, Id suck a fart’...’suck a fart out of Seize’s ass and woul beg for more as she suffocates me, no cap. Lick her from those ankles to those thighs n back, I bet she tastes like one of those sour n sweet skittles wid the way she sweaty from beating others asses but good from the way she hot, and dat shit be the best shit u can taste. wont even say sorry, jus flip her over and eat that ass’...’#NomNomNom’”

“Wow, some of you guys are pretty creative. I mean, I can’t tell you what I taste like but if you wanna try it out, lemme know.” You giggled, winking at the camera as you made the ‘call me’ sign with your hands. 

You were waiting for another blow up from the angry blonde beside you but were surprised to see him silent. He was clenching his jaw harder this time around, eyes narrowed in fuming slits and he shook slightly by how hard his body tensed. You were about to ask if he was okay when you got the signal to end it, so you ignored it for the moment as you gave a bright smile to the camera.

“Well, that seems to be the end of this little segment, boo!,” You gave a pout, before smiling again, jumping back up and tossing an arm around your cast-mate, “Thanks for having us on today, and to end on a serious note make sure you’re staying safe out there. We all care about every single one of you, that’s why we do stuff like this, to stay connected! Have fun, be safe, and remember, be heroes! This has been Seize, along with,”

“Ground Zero.”

“Bye!”

“Cut!”

As soon as it was over, you were thrown off Bakugo’s shoulders as he stood up abruptly. You looked over in worry as he rigidly walked off and you wondered what had went wrong.

During most heavy-duty operations, which are the only type of operations you both worked together, Bakugou was always silent and calculating. He angered easily, and the time to fear him most is becomes quiet. Making a villain piss his pants with his yelling was a skill indeed, but when a villain saw that angered and dark gaze, that’s when they should be terrified. 

You tried to follow him, but you were immediately swarmed by your manager who had apologized for arriving late.

“Yes, it is alright! I understand I was able to start perfectly fine, it’s no trouble at all.”

You didn’t listen to his answer, scanning the crowd to realize you had lost the pro.

“Dammit.”

“Ne, (l/n)-sama is there something wrong?” 

“No,” You shook your head with a sigh, “Nothing at all.”

-----------------------------

[thisisyournarratorspeaking]

January 16, 2022.

faith.

It’s a pretty damn lonely journey and not just because we’re in a pandemic.

It’s not as simple as telling him, “I wish you could be happy for me.”

maintenance.

Right now it’s about getting calories, nothing much more complex than that. This morning I bought more nuts and dried fruits. Some are for Tu B’Shevat tomorrow and most are for low-effort snacking. I also signed up for a half marathon in late spring; it’ll be the longest distance I’ve ever run and therefore will require Actual Training.

(I’ve just remembered an unfinished poem titled “Holy Penance on the Treadmill.” I made notes for it when I was depressed in college and holy fuck, I’m really looking forward to someday rooting out the internalized belief that ‘suffering = worthiness, you gotta earn good things’ and throwing that whole stupid mindset in the trash. In the meantime the reasons I’m using to justify the half are a) exercise is supposed to help, b) I need excuses to get out of bed in the mornings, and c) me running a half will make a friend of mine very happy.)

Doctor’s appointment: Done. Next up: Therapy. Hoping to schedule two more appointments for various things in February with the hope that by then examinations and whatnot will be marginally safer.

people.

I want to want to date, but I don’t.

My coworkers laughed in sympathy when I said, “I’m really enjoying this pandemic in the middle of my twenties, it’s doing wonders for my social life!” And...yeah. There are much better reasons to be pissed off about everything. My small grievance – among other grievances – is I felt like my life was on hold after college. Hitting the play button would be possible after I got a master’s degree, got a job, moved out of my parent’s house. I’ve checked all those things off and now it’s like, “Ah, a global pandemic! Great time to socialize.”

This isn’t to say I’m not trying. I am! I’m just grumbling the whole way through.

A friend from high school tweeted about dealing with guys who don’t respond: “I’m sought after, I don’t seek.” I’m amused by and a little envious of how easily he claims that stance.

Someone strange and delightful thinks I’m fun and cool. They offered me their phone number. What the heck (in a good way).

responsibilities.

Have been low-key ghosting the organizing group – there’s often not enough time and energy on Fridays to take an hour out of my work day (which has to be made up elsewhere), plus conflicts. I might want to step back and offer financial support instead of time.

Then I could focus more on the professional group, where the responsibilities are only going to increase this year. (I still want to get that book group started.)

making stuff.

Another chapter of the more-autobiographical-than-not fic up. Today I gotta write a short essay; tomorrow I’m hoping to work on the other fic.

I had a joint writing blog with an online friend in high school and early college. He had a Penzu journal, clocked a million or more words in it regularly, was a minimalist and a writer. We wrote letters back and forth. I’m not the best at regular commitments and it petered out. As far as I know he’s off Tumblr (good for him, I hope he’s doing well).

Anyway, he’s who I thought of when reading the Spork literary magazine change log. It’s the closest thing I’ve found to news on Richard Siken’s work and well-being. Who the heck knows what happened to Blue Jupiters (Copper Canyon Press, 2021)?

[matryoshkamark]

I have just stumbled upon this blog and I have to say, FINALLY A WHEATLEY WITH CURLY HAIR! Sir lookin damn fabulous! Also question, what kinda lighter would this Wheat boi use?

AAAAAAA AAA AA A THANK YOU OMG I'M SO GLAD YOU LIKE THE BLONDE AND MILDLY WAVY TO GINGER AND NIGH-AFRO TEXTURE PIPELINE /pos

now for the lighter he just uses them tiny little bic lighters with a long tube at the end, "its easier for me", so he says.

i keep tryna tell him to just. not smoke at all but he doesn't ever listen. he has organic lungs, and i'm warning him about the tobacco risks, he just doesn't care. lord, i gotta get him a better coping mechanism...