#(i found one style in one brand that works for me and i just order the exact same kind online whenever one wears out XD)

[ajortga]

she's different

pairing: jenna ortega x fem reader

based off request! it was late here, but wanted to post this for you, trying to work on another request and once that's done i'll take other ones, requests are currently closed, but check my masterlist and i'll open it soon once i finish! i found this so so funny, i hope this met your thoughts.

-

jenna ortega x fem!r request pls

where aliyah asks jenna for food/ to buy her food in the middle of the night cus shes hungry and jenna says no. But when r asks jenna for food in the middle of the night jenna immediately orders r food leaving aliyah bewildered

-

Jenna had her headphones on, it was almost 1AM in her household, but Jenna had insomnia at a young age, so it was normal for her.

She was reading a book while everyone was asleep since she was visiting, you had gotten it for her and the first two pages in, she was infested.

Half-way done meant that her nose was sticking through it almost every second they saw her.

They’d call her name? No response, they would have to physically fight the book out of her hand till she noticed.

She was frantically reading, retaining every piece of info from the book as it got closer to the answer of the plot twist.

Honestly, her whole family found it amusing when Jenna found a book that she enjoyed. She would seriously skip lunch and stay up till sunrise to finish the book.

The pages flipped and flopped, it was a bit hectic, at this point her page flipping was a portable fan.

Then, someone opened the door, making a small squeak from the opening, pulling the bed sheets off of Jenna.

Her sister Aliyah closed the door, sitting down on her bed, “Thank lord you're awake. Finally that book came to some good use.”

Jenna almost groaned as Aliyah snatched the book from her, pulling the blanket back on top of her. “Aliyah! Oh my god I was so close to figuring out who-”

“Tell me later, right now, I’m having the strongest feeling in my entire life, I never ever felt this way before. It’s like-”

Jenna took a nearby pillow and threw it on Aliyah’s head, “Oh my god! Just tell me and let’s get this over with! You just took my book right before the best part! Give me that back!” 

“I need you to get me food. I’m witnessing the most atrocious food craving.. Hear me out, french fries. Not just any french fries, they have to be curly, with that animal style sauce. It’s simple.” Aliyah points to the smaller brunette, “You’re awake,” then points to herself, “And I’m broke, what does that make? Annual midnight cravings. Come on! Please!”

Jenna was annoyed, did her sister just take her most precious treasure, for fries? Hell no. Maybe in the morning, but she would not be driving out in the dark for some fries.

“Give me my book!” She hissed, trying to grab the book from Aliyah’s stretching hand.

“Then GET me my fries!”

“It’s 1AM! I’m not getting you any fries, ask like.. Markus to give it to you in the afternoon.”

“If I wanted it in the afternoon I would’ve! But I’m hungry! I won’t give you your book if you won’t get me my fries!”

At this point the two were rolling on the bed.

“Jenna, remember I gave you 10 dollars to buy food! This is you paying me back!”

“You never gave me 10 dollars for food! What are you talking about?” Jenna said as sharply, but quietly as she could.

“You bought 2 packs of kiwi candy, raspberries, and the worst ramen brand you could have chosen!”

“That was what the fuck? That was 3 years ago! And I didn't know that they were full on gluten free!”

The bed was shaking as Jenna tried getting the book out of Aliyah’s hand, it was so loud but so quiet at the same time.

A small squeak was heard, your eyes peeking through the door.

You came in, rubbing your eyes, making your girlfriend and her sister freeze and stare at you.

You looked at them for a moment, opening your eyes in confusion, “What?” You mumbled, not aware of what was going on.

Jenna stopped attacking Aliyah immediately as she walked over to you, cupping your tired pink cheeks, “Baby, it’s 1:24AM in the morning? Why are you awake?” Jenna whispered softly.

You were tired, Jenna’s focus was on you, and you can make out Aliyah’s figure searching their shared room for Jenna’s wallet around the room, searching in drawers, murmuring how goo goo ga ga Jenna was over you as soon as she sees you.

You yawned, leaning into her embrace, “I woke up and I didn’t feel you next to me, then I heard your voice and the wall practically fluttering. Also I woke up with a really nice craving, curly fries with animal style sauce, oh and some nice peach tea from that one super market we always go to! Oh, oh! Also those watermelon sour patch kids!” 

Your voice was so silly and drowsy when you were half awake.

Aliyah snapped her head towards you, “Curly fries?”

Before anything could even move, Jenna was gone and came back 5 seconds later with everything you wanted. She shushed you and sat you down on her bed as she brought you everything you wanted, kissing your forehead as you rubbed your eyes.

Aliyah’s mouth was hung open as she stared at her sister, “Oh. I see how it is, so your girlfriend gets any food she wants at any time. But your amazing, beautiful, gorgeous, sweet sister can’t get her fries? I’m hungry!”

Jenna wasn’t listening, feeding you fries as she patted your hair and stroked it, treating you like a princess. 

“I still have your book!”

“You can keep that for now,” she murmured, turning to you as she coaxed you with kisses on your head, “You can eat and tell me if you need anything more.”

“This isn’t fair!” Aliyah cried.

-

Of course, you gave Aliyah basically all the fries after eating like, 9 because we love her and she is so patootie. She was crunching them as she watched Jenna cuddle you to sleep, rolling her eyes and munching on them.

"You're lucky you had curly fries." Aliyah scoffed playfully, snapping a photo of you two and turning off the lights as she left the room, the small munches of her fries being heard.

[befemininenow]

Are you a trans girl or non-conforming and would like to try out feminine clothing? You may want to check this out.

Say you found this dress online and you really love the overall style of it. Great! If you’re like me, you would say “F it! I’ll buy the dress and I’ll wear it how I like!” and move on with your life. That should the end of this guide, right? Except, there is one little problem: not everybody thinks this way. Those who look for the best matching outfits aren’t just searching to fit their style, color, or personality. It also has to do with their body type. If you’re in that situation, this guide may help you out.

Body shape

Believe it or not, there are many different types of body shape (up to 10). However, the most common tend to be the following (in no order):

Rectangle- Even distribution on shoulders, hips, and waistline

Pear/Triangle- Wide hips, well-defined waist, small shoulders

Hourglass- Near-exact hip and shoulder measurements, thinner waistline

Inverted Triangle- Broader shoulders, narrower hips, little waist definition

Apple/Round- Broad shoulders and big bust, thin legs and hips

Many transgender women have the inverted triangle body shape due to several factors such as genetics, bone structure, and age. However, your body shape may also change over time due to a rebalancing of hormones, body fat, and even lifestyle. While you can’t change your bone structure, you can change your body definition through exercises.

Body proportion

Here is something you may find useful if you’re looking to customize your look. Body proportions are unique to every individual and play a factor on clothing and to some extent, accessories such as jewelry. For instance, you may find the skirt you bought looks either too long or short. There are a few areas where to measure your body proportions such as wrist length or neck size. But the best way to improve your dress type is by following the “golden ratio rule” of dividing your body into three:

The way this is read is you’re either one-third top, two-thirds bottom, or you’re two-thirds top, one-third bottom. Once you get more knowledge, you can go upwards even eighths! But for now, the focus is on these two outcomes.

The two-thirds top, one-third bottom words well with long dresses:

while the one-third top, two-thirds bottom works well with more casual clothing:

Body measurements

Now that we got a few problems out of our way, it’s time to figure out what measurements you have. The best way to find out is by using a mirror and a soft measuring tape for body. Measure all the crucial parts of your body, which are the waist, hips, shoulders, and bust. This will determine the type of body you have and have a better idea on what length you will need to try out your clothing of choice.

Shoe size

One thing very important about an outfit is choosing footwear. Although you can use your old Converses with your flared jeans, you’re certainly not going to use them with a ruffled dress. You’re definitely going to want heels or flats! Unfortunately, women’s shoe size are not exactly the same as men. But don’t give up! Fortunately, there are women’s size conversion charts that help you choose what shoe size you need.

To find out your measurements on your own, grab at least two blank pieces of paper, a pencil or pen, and a measuring tape. Place your foot firmly forward and carefully trace around the outer area of your foot. Repeat this with your other foot. Once finished, grab your measuring tape and measure from your highest point to your lowest on both sheets. Measure the width as well. If both feet measure close to 10.5, your women’s size is a 12. However, due to a difference in manufacturing based on shoe brand, as well as shoe type like pumps, the average recommended size is at least 2 inches above your actual size. For those living in other countries that don’t use the US measuring size, I left a chart that shows all the possible measurements you may use to convert your shoe size into women’s size.

What to wear based on body type

Since not all clothing is made for everyone, it’s time to list what is considered the “ideal” clothing choices based on body type. Note that these are opinions from my source’s authors. IMO, the pictures below each suggestion are a better opinion. Your are free to choose your type of clothing.

Rounded or apple shapes fit best with monochrome colors and make the person look more “fit”.

Pear or triangle shapes look more balanced with decorative accessories on top while keeping the bottom more plain.

Rectangle shapes tend to have more volume with a waist belt while pleated pants give more volume on hips.

Hourglass shapes look best when wearing bodycon dresses and cardigans to emphasize volume in their waistline.

Inverted triangle shapes pull off the wide leg pants and fitted top combo the best.

For a much more comprehensive guide for each body type, I highly recommend reading The Concept Wardrobe’s guides. It gives more details on what to wear and how to choose the best combinations. Link is provided here: https://theconceptwardrobe.com/search?query=body+frame

Tips on what to wear

Now that you reached this point, I’m pretty sure you’re excited to try out what your heart desires. However, before you go out and buy that two-piece dress, I recommend researching and observing the type of clothing women wear today. Believe it or not, people will judge based on your way of dressing, from background to social status to age. A simple look like bodysuit and jeans may look perfect on you and blend you in with the girls, but something like a hot pink bodycon will make you stand out, and most likely not in a good way. So how would you choose something that blends you in with society, but also be comfortable at the same time? Here are some tips and pics:

Find clothing that “feels” feminine. In other words, buy clothing that “feminizes” your body, such as tops that make your shoulders look shorter, wrap dresses that make your waistline shorter, and skirts that make your hips look wider.

Find the best colors based on skin tone and hair color. For instance, try out warm colors such as orange if your skin tone is warm.

Dress sexy, but never go too revealing. Seriously, have some respect to yourself. But if you really want to go out wearing, for example, a two-piece outfit, wear one that looks stylish and flatters your body in a great way.

Use accessories that fit and blend well with your body. Large jewelry goes well with larger frame, small jewelry fits with smaller wrist, and so forth. Don’t forget the purse! It is absolutely necessary now that you’re wearing pocketless clothing. Choose one that fits your taste and needs.

Bras and undergarments are necessary to wear now. As you further into your transition, your breasts will start growing and it will become more difficult and uncomfortable going out braless. Start out with a brassiere, then move on to a fitted bra as they become bigger over time. As for down there, I would use boy briefs as they’re similar to boxers. Although HRT will cause it to shrink, it does not make it disappear. If you must hide it, use a gaff or a tuck, but do not use chastity belts (Seriously, stay away from that unless you’re really into that thing). 

Optional: use waist shapers or corsets to slim down waist. Hip enlargement pads will also give your narrow hips and butt much needed volume. Breast forms can also give you an idea how big you want them in the future.

Fashion sense

But the most important part of choosing clothing as a trans girl is to wear whatever suits your taste.

For instance, are you more into the traditional and simple feminine aesthetic? Cottagecore may be for you:

But what if you’re the rebellious type that prefers to defy tradition? Well, maybe the alt-girl fashion is for you:

Maybe you’re the type that changes clothing based on season. So if you’re a summer-season type of girl, you’re definitely going for an outfit like this:

How about if you’re into the gym? Clearly your goal is to be like this:

Are you into business casual? There’s also a pic for that:

(The girl in the pic is also transgender! Her name is Suzi Hunter, better known as The Sphere Hunter.)

But we also can’t forget cosplay, either!:

(Cosplayer is Eden the Doll, a trans woman cosplayer! Picture belongs to Geo Leon.)

You’re probably the party type who loves some action:

Casual wear can also be tasteful and attractive too:

There’s so much to pic, but each style says a lot about what type of woman you are.

Where to buy clothing

If you’re interested in finding the right clothes for you, check out places that are especially gender-inclusive. As I’m based in the US, clothing stores such as Target are a good start while higher-end chains such as Nordstrom and Macy’s may have a better variety to choose from. If you’re a thrifty shopper, your local outlets, discount stores, and thrift shops have a surprising amount of great clothing for affordable prices. Although online sites like Amazon, Shein, and Zara have affordable and appealing clothing, many of these brands also have ethical concerns that overshadow their reputation. Dubbed “fast fashion”, they are a source of scrutiny among fashion fans and I would personally avoid them if possible. If you really need something affordable and new, I highly recommend purchasing through discount and thrift stores.

If you’re in need of safe undergarments, check out Urbody. They have clothing suitable for trans people, non-binary, and other identities, varying from binders to tucked leggings. They are founded by trans and non-binary people and use ethical practices and living wages for their workers. If you’re interested in checking their site out, here is the link to their page (I am not sponsored by them): https://urbody.co/

Conclusion

The whole point of this guide is to help you pick the proper clothing and accessories as a newly-out girl. I made this guide since there doesn’t seem to be many that are detailed. Keep in mind I’m still learning about female clothing as I am still in the first stages of transition myself. If anyone would like to add more info that is missing or provide any corrections, please reblog and add more helpful tips as it would help trans girls, trans women, non-binary, and anyone else that desires to wear affirming clothing. Please refrain from using any hurtful language if you’re doing so. Thank you and hugs!

Links to sources:

https://www.healthline.com/health/women-body-shapes#why-shape-fluctuates

https://www.thestylatude.com/post/the-most-common-body-shapes-for-women-and-how-to-find-out-yours

https://theconceptwardrobe.com/build-a-wardrobe/inverted-triangle-body-shape

https://www.thestylebouquet.com/2020/02/17/5-most-common-body-shapes-for-women/

https://dressedformyday.com/how-to-discover-your-body-proportions/

https://gabriellearruda.com/how-to-dress-better-female-body-shape/

https://m2fguide.com/how-to-pick-clothes-if-youre-transgender-or-crossdressing/

https://feminizationsecrets.com/mtf-clothing-tips/

https://www.instagram.com/p/CHBk9v0J_WO/

https://www.transgendermap.com/social/clothing-accessories/

https://apexfoot.com/shoe-sizing-chart/

https://www.glamourboutique.com/crossdresser-fashion/guide-male-female-shoe-sizes-33255#:~:text=Minimize%20the%20chance%20of%20having,11%20in%20a%20women's%20shoe

[faithst]

ZB1 WHEN SOMEONE FLIRTS W THEM WHILE BEING AROUND YOU

pairing zb1 x gn!reader

genre fluff

warnings mentions of food?

notes hellooooo, thank you for requesting <3 i’m sorry for the delay ☹️ and i hope you enjoy this ^^

also trying out a new style of writing reactions, (inspired by @chxrrymxxnlight , go check them out !) tell me if i should stick with this or my old one ❤️

masterlist<3

— zhang hao

awkward. like really awkward

awkward smiles, trying to brush them off

unless they get too close to him or anything, he’s really polite 😇

zhanghao had brought you on a date to a new café that recently opened. everything was great; the service, the vibes, the food and especially your boyfriend. you thought nothing could ruin this moment until a waiter decided to come back to your table right after taking your orders.

the waiter didn’t even look at you and went straight to zhanghao. “you’re really cute, can i have your number?” zhanghao was really shocked, now very uncomfortable and looking at you for help. he tried to brush the waiter off by saying “i’m sorry, i’m kind of in the middle of a dat-” the waiter put a hand on his shoulder.

“i know we can work it out.” the waiter said, smiling at him. he pushed their hand off, standing up obviously annoyed. “you shouldn’t just touch people like that. let’s go babe.”

— sung hanbin

v v v v v polite

awkward laughs whenever they do a pickupline 😀

makes an excuse to get out of it

you were shopping with hanbin for skincare products. he said he’d help you find a product that was good for your skin type. as he looked around the wellness store, he found a brand that he wanted to recommend. he grabbed one of the moisturisers and showed it to you “this one is great, i use this.” you took it from his hand and looked at the product information.

a worker came up to you both, smiling as they look at the product in your hand. “oh, this product is very good for a cutie like you!” they say, beaming to hanbin who was now laughing trying to brush them off, awkwardly shifting to you.

“you should give me your number and maybe i can tell you about our promotions.” they continue, offering their phone to him. “haha, no worries.. i actually have somewhere to go now!” hanbin took your hand, running out the store in a flash.

— seok matthew

makes it obvious he’s in a relationship

doesn’t want to be mean

but he still shoves it in their face that he’s perfectly happy and in love w you 🥰

matthew had brought you to dinner, with you looking so stunning in his eyes. everyone could’ve seen how lovestruck he was; basically giggling and twirling his hair around. well, everyone except this one person.

they came up to you both, confused on the sudden approach. they gave you a disgusted look but then faced straight to your boyfriend. “you’re definitely my type.” they say, smiling as they hand him their phone asking for his number.

“my partner thinks that too!” he says, grabbing both your hands as he kisses your knuckles making you blush a rosy red. matthew made sure the love in his eyes were even more prominent after that.

— shen ricky

politely declines

“no thanks.”

if the person is persistent, he just leaves them hanging 🧍

going out with ricky was very common and people staring at your amazing boyfriend in awe was also quite common. when you both decided to visit an art museum, he got more attention than the art displayed.

usually, people would just stop and stare. but this time, someone came up to him. “i couldn’t help myself because you’re very attractive.” they smiled before continuing “can i invite you out to dinner?” ricky looked at you before looking back at them.

“no, thank you.” he intertwines your hands, bringing them up to show it off to them “but-” they try to speak up but ricky already walked away to another section of the museum with you.

— park gunwook

confused 😐

looks to you for help

lets you speak to the person

you and gunwook were going to buy some stuff from the convenience store for a movie date at home. as he scans the shelves for a pack of his favourite snack, he reaches for the last pack of homerun balls when another person snatches it away from him.

his mood sullens until they offer the pack back to him “you can have this in exchange for your number.” they state, completely ignoring you. he was caught off guard by the abrupt bold move from a stranger.

gunwook looked to you, eyes signalling for help. you caught onto this and went in-front of him “sorry, he doesn’t have a number.” you pass by them, pulling gunwook along with you to another convenience store.

— kim taerae

the way he looks at people is so 😵‍💫

so naturally, he attracts alot of people

super dense and nice

taerae had prepared a cute little picnic date for you two to get away from work stress and spend more time together. he helped lay out the mat and the food that he made beforehand. while munching away on his sandwich, he noticed someone in the distance.

“they have a nice bag.” he says, pointing to the bag. you nod in agreement when the person that owned the bag came up to you. “sorry, i just happened to notice you staring.” they say, shyly smiling “oh, i’m so sorry!” taerae apologised profusely for staring.

“it’s okay, i think you’re quite cute.” the statement made taerae laugh, smiling as he thanked them. “i just thought your bag was cool!” he mentioned, his hand forming a ‘thumbs up’. they smile, thanking him before asking him for his number. he tilted his head “oh, do you sell this bag? i don’t think you should be selling them with your personal number.”

— kim gyuvin

honestly a bit scared

stranger danger ‼️

might call 911

as you both were about to line up to get onto the ferris wheel ride, someone approached you both. gyuvin was confused at first and just wanted to deal with it until they hit him with ‘i never believed in love at first sight until i saw you.’ his eyes widened at the pickup line.

immediately, he grabbed your hand and ran far away. “gyuvin, what was that for?” you ask, slowing down to catch your breath. gyuvin paced around, checking every corner to make sure the coast was clear.

“i’m gonna call 911.” he stated, absolutely mortified. before he could dial the number, you snatched his phone away. he tried getting it back but you stopped him. “they didn’t do anything, gyuvin.” you say, shaking your head while crossing your arms. gyuvin held his hands to his hips “hey, i could’ve gotten kidnapped!”

— kim jiwoong

he’s really pretty so naturally, it attracts

but you’re in luck cause he only has eyes for you 🫣

legit just ignores them

a perfect date with your perfect boyfriend; an ideal situation everyone wanted to be in. a situation that you were in right now. jiwoong wanted to make up for not having dates as he was busy with work so he brought you to a nice restaurant.

everything was perfect until someome came up to him with a sultry gaze. jiwoong didn’t notice them though, he didn’t want to. the person tried to get his attention but he didn’t budge. his eyes were locked onto yours, hands resting his chin. “how was your day, my love?” he asked, not breaking the eye contact.

in another attempt to get your boyfriend’s attention; they speak up “do you think i could get your-“ jiwoong shushes them with one finger on his lips before turning back to you, smiling. “where were we?”

— han yujin

says no but if they still try

he gets annoyed and he might be a bit mean 💥

brutally honest ?

hanging out after school with yujin were your favourite times, his too. loving the peace and quiet after a exhausting school day. you were about to ask yujin a question about an assignment that was due but was quickly interrupted by another student handing him a letter that had a paper heart on it.

“i hope you accept my feelings.” they say, shyly looking down. yujin just stares at the letter before placing the letter back into their hands. “no, i like them.” he said, looking at you. “i can be better than them.” they remarked, giving you a glare.

“no you can’t.” he said with a blunt expression, standing up. he offered his hand to help you up before picking up his bag and moving to another quiet place “we won’t be disturbed there.”

© keiwook | 2023

taglist @bruhiamistake @trashhdez @chxrrymxxnlight @haesunflower @big-uwu-stan @gnwookie @yjhcloud

here, if you want to join the taglist !

[mrs-dr-reid]

Betting on the Right Horse

Chapter One: A Goodbye Brings A Hello

Chapter Summary: Reader goes back to Horseshoe Ridge, Colorado after many years away for her uncle Jason Gideon’s funeral, and she learns that while she is the main beneficiary and inheritor of his horse ranch, she has shared ownership with Spencer Reid: her uncle’s protegée, and she’s PISSED.

Word Count: 4013

Chapter Warnings: Swearing, tw death/funerals, tw grief, tw food/eating/drinking, Spencer Reid being a little bit of an OOC asswagon (unless you're familiar with the dilaudid arc), Reader being a teensy bit entitled

A/N: Ayyyyy, welcome to my first slow burn AU series! A big shout out to all my fellow writers in the discord server I’m in for helping me outline this series and figure out the plot (and also letting me yell at them about this fic in general)!

———————————————————————

I honestly couldn’t believe it when I got the call. I was just getting home from work when a number I didn’t recognize showed up on my screen, and when I answered, it was my Uncle Jason’s friend Dave (who I vaguely remembered from when I was younger) telling me that he passed away the night prior due to heart failure. I almost dropped everything onto the floor of my apartment, because I hadn’t talked to Uncle Jason in a while, and now he’s gone and I’ll never get another chance.

Dave told me all of the details for Uncle Jason’s funeral, then offered his condolences before hanging up, and I had to go sit down and collect my thoughts and feelings. I practically grew up on Uncle Jason’s horse ranch, Sparrow Creek, and it was one of my favorite places in the whole world, especially the little town of Horseshoe Ridge, Colorado where it was located and all the people in it, and now I regret not going to visit as much once I went off to college.

I immediately called my boss and told her I’d be taking the next few days off to go to the funeral, even though it was VERY last minute. Thankfully, she was very understanding and told me to take as much time as I needed (something about a bereavement period, I honestly don’t know what she said after she told me it was okay for me to take off work because I couldn’t hear her over the blood rushing in my ears). After I hung up, I dragged my suitcase out of the hallway closet and started packing while simultaneously booking the first flight out to Colorado I could find on my laptop. I dug around in my closet and found my old riding boots, and was happy to discover that they still fit, so I stuck them in my suitcase just in case there was an opportunity to go riding while I was out there.

Once my suitcase and my carry-on bag were packed, I grabbed my keys, shut off my lights, and then headed back out to my car and to the airport, where I was thankfully able to get some work done on my laptop while waiting for my flight so I wasn’t atrociously behind once I got back. Once I landed at the Denver airport, I ordered an Uber to take me to the ranch, and after I was dropped off, a wave of nostalgia washed over me as I looked up at the wrought iron gate with the logo of a sparrow flying over a babbling brook branded into it.

A taller Asian man in a cowboy hat, worn-out jeans, scuffed-up boots, and a button-up shirt rolled up to his elbows saw me standing there as he walked by and called out, “Can I help you, Ma’am?”, so I snapped out of my reverie and said, “Oh! Yeah, sorry. I’m Y/N L/N, Jason Gideon’s niece. I’m here for the funeral this weekend?”, which made him say, “Wait, Y/N/N? It’s me, Matt!”, as he walked over to me. My jaw dropped open and I said, “Matt Simmons?! No way, how are you?”, as I let him pull me into a hug (I taught him how to ride equestrian style when we were kids).

He said, “I’m good! Gideon hired me as a ranch hand a few years ago, I got married a little bit after that, and we’ve got two boys with twin girls on the way,” which made my eyebrows fly up to my hairline before I said, “Wow. You’ve been busy,” making him chuckle and say, “Yeah, I guess I have. Anyways, I’m sorry for your loss. Gideon was a good man, and it was an honor working for him,” the conversation suddenly turning serious.

I let out a melancholy sigh and said, “Yeah, he was the best. A teensy bit eccentric, but I’m gonna miss him. I regret not coming to visit for so long now that he’s gone,” tears starting to well up in my eyes. Matt rubbed my arm comfortingly, then said, “Well, I should probably bring your stuff to your old room, then maybe I can give you a tour? A lot of stuff has changed since the last time you were in town,” so I wiped my eyes, put on the closest thing to a smile I could muster, and said, “Yeah, I’d like that,” before following him up the path to the ranch house.

Once my stuff was situated in the room I always stayed in when I came to visit (it hadn’t changed at all since I was here last), Matt showed me around the ranch and pointed out everything that had changed, and I had to admit it looked amazing. The stables had been extended within the last year to make room for more horses, a horseshoe of cabins had been added to the west side of the property to accommodate dude ranch guests, the training arena and paddock had doubled in size, and the stalls themselves had been updated to be a bit bigger and more comfortable for the horses.

We circled back to the stables just as another darker-skinned man (also in a cowboy hat) came trotting over to us on a beautiful Tovero Paint, and he said, “Hey, Matt! Who’s the lady?”, as he dismounted. Matt said, “Hey, Luke. This is Y/N L/N, Gideon’s niece. Y/N, this is Luke Alvez, one of the ranch hands, and this is Raven, one of our newer mares,” while gesturing to each of them. I stroked her nose and said, “She’s beautiful. Are all of the horses still named after birds?”, so Luke chuckled and replied, “Oh yeah, that’s never going to change. And I don’t know if you remember the town lawyer Hotch, but he just inherited his dad’s old ranch a couple of years ago, and his wife secretly named all of the horses after fictional lawyers,” which made me burst out laughing before I said, “Oh my god, really?!”

Matt let out a snort before he said, “Yup. And he only figured it out a month ago, because Emily’s horse misbehaved and she accidentally said, ‘Miss Elle Woods, you should be ashamed of yourself!’, in front of him,” which only made me laugh harder. Luke said, “At least we don’t name them after different types of pasta like Rossi does,” making me say, “Oh, I would constantly be hungry if I was over there,” earning nods of agreement from the men and a whinny from Raven. I turned to Matt and said, “Are Nelson and Chickadee still around? They were my favorites when I was younger,” so he nodded and said, “Yep. They mostly do trail rides for the less experienced riders nowadays, but they’re still here. Wanna go see them?”, which made a giant grin spread across my face before I said, “Yes!”, and Matt lead me to their stalls after we bid our goodbyes to Luke and Raven.

I approached Nelson first, and I said, “Hey, Big Guy! I’m not sure if you remember me, but I certainly remember you!”, while holding out my hand for him to sniff. He snorted happily and nuzzled against my hand once I started scratching his nose, and Matt said, “I think he remembers you,” which made me smile while I continued stroking him. Chickadee huffed indignantly from her stall, so I walked over to her and said, “Oh, I’d never forget about you, Pretty Girl!”, as she nuzzled my hand in a very self-satisfied manner.

Matt said, “There are a couple more horses that weren’t here last time if you wanted to meet them too,” which made me shoot him a look before I jokingly said, “I can’t believe you’d ever think I didn’t want to meet a new horse,” earning me a playful eye-roll from Matt before I was introduced to his horse, Robin the Clydesdale, and the rest of the trail horses: Puffin the Norwegian Fjord, Starling the Tennessee Walking Horse, Eagle the Off The Track Thoroughbred, and Falcon the Hanoverian. We exited the stables, and Matt said, “Well, you probably want to try and settle in before the funeral tomorrow, so I’m gonna get back to work,” so I nodded and said, “Yeah, yeah, definitely. See you tomorrow, and thanks again for the tour,” which made him tip his hat at me with a wink before walking off.

When I made it back to my room, I flopped onto the bed and had to take a breather. I tried to settle my mind by unpacking my bags and hanging my clothes up in the closet to get some of the wrinkles out (fingers crossed), but then I saw a picture of me at age 11 sitting on Nelson’s back and Uncle Jason holding the reigns and smiling up at me proudly, and tears instantly came to my eyes. I grabbed the picture frame off of the dresser, and I whispered, “I’m gonna miss you, Uncle Jason. I’m sorry I didn’t keep in touch,” before setting it back down and getting out my phone to order dinner. I quickly figured out DoorDash wasn’t really a thing in Horseshoe Ridge, but thankfully I remembered that Uncle Jason kept a whole drawer of delivery menus next to the fridge. Once that was squared away, I got into my pajamas, ate my dinner once it arrived, and then called it a night.

At the funeral, I sat next to Matt and his family since I didn’t know anybody else there, and listened with tears in my eyes as Dave gave the eulogy. I was invited up to say a few words, so I kept it short and sweet (mostly to avoid crying in front of a room full of strangers) and said, “My Uncle Jason was one of the best people I’ve ever known. As Dave said, he was selfless, intelligent, and had one of the biggest hearts I’ve ever seen. He’ll be dearly missed, and I sincerely regret not coming to visit more often,” before nodding in thanks and sitting back down, Matt rubbing my shoulder encouragingly as I did so.

At the reception, I was making small talk with the perky blonde woman Luke introduced to me as his girlfriend Penelope when Matt came up to us and said, “Hey, Y/N/N! I wanted to introduce you to Dr. Spencer Reid. Spencer, this is Y/N L/N, Gideon’s niece,” and then I looked at who he’d gestured to, and my heart skipped a beat because I was looking at a man at least 6 inches taller than me in a well-tailored suit with wild brown curls, stubble decorating his jaw in a way that somehow didn’t look disheveled, and honey brown eyes that made me feel like I was going to melt into the floor. I was broken out of my reverie when the man said, “It’s nice to meet you, Y/N. Gideon talked about you a lot,” but he didn’t stick out a hand to shake.

I shrugged it off as some germaphobe thing, then I said, “It’s nice to meet you as well, Spencer. How did you know my uncle?”, and he replied, “He guest lectured at my university a lot, and I’d always wanted to be a cowboy growing up, so once I graduated, he took me under his wing and showed me the ins and outs of running a ranch. He even made me the foreman a couple of years back,” making me nod understandingly. A thought occurred to me, and I said, “I’m sorry, Matt said you were a doctor, but you don’t look that much older than me. Are you some kind of genius or something?”, which made him shove his hands into his pockets and say, “I have three Ph.D’s in mathematics, chemistry, and engineering. I also have an IQ of 187, an eidetic memory, and I can read 20,000 words per minute, so yes, I guess I’m what is considered to be a genius,” in a tone that could be easily interpreted as nonchalant or arrogant.

I decided to go with the first option and say, “Impressive. Anyways, it was really nice to meet you, but you’ll have to excuse me. I need a refill and a snack,” while holding up my nearly empty wine glass in a pointed way. The corner of his mouth quirked up, and he said, “Likewise,” before nodding and wandering off. I smiled in a confused manner as I watched him go, then said, “He’s… peculiar. I can see why Uncle Jason liked him,” which made Matt let out a snort and say, “He’s one of the only people who could beat him at chess. Besides you and Rossi, of course,” earning an eye roll and a playful shoulder shove from me.

After I’d obtained my second glass of wine (or maybe third? I’m not 100% sure), a tall dark-haired man approached me and said, “Miss L/N? Could I borrow a few minutes of your time?”, so I nodded and said, “Of course,” while quickly scouting out a place to set my glass. The man continued, “My name is Aaron Hotchner, but most people call me Hotch. I’m the town lawyer here in Horseshoe Ridge, and I worked very closely with your uncle for many years,” and held out a hand to shake. I fought to contain a snort when I remembered what Luke and Matt told me about the horses at his ranch, and I shook his hand while saying, “Nice to put a face to the name,” which made him crack a smile before saying, “I was wondering if you’d be able to come by my office tomorrow morning for the reading of your uncle’s will,” and a chill ran down my spine momentarily before I nodded curtly and said, “Yeah, absolutely,” hoping Hotch didn’t notice.

He eyed me with a touch of concern for a few seconds, then reached into his jacket pocket, pulled out a business card, and handed it to me while saying “I’ll see you tomorrow then. Ten thirty. Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to locate the partners in crime that are my wife and son,” before nodding and trotting into the other room, and I could barely hear him call, “Emily! Jack!”, as he disappeared. I tucked the card into my purse after looking it over for a moment, then wandered back to where Matt was sitting with his (very pregnant) wife, Kristy, and their two sons, David and Jake. I said, “I’m gonna head back to the ranch, okay?”, while gesturing towards the door of the funeral home, so Matt nodded and said, “Do you need a ride?”, which made me shake my head and say, “No, Luke gave me the keys for the truck because he’s riding back with Penelope. Thank you, though,” before smiling at him, extending a quick “nice to meet you” to Kristy and the boys, and leaving.

The next day, I arrived at Hotch’s office at the same time as Spencer, and I started to ask, “What are you do-...?”, but then it hit me and I smacked myself on the head before saying, “I’m such an idiot. Of course Uncle Jason would have left you something, you worked with him for how many years?”, which made Spencer chuckle slightly and say, “Five years, three months, and fourteen days. But who’s keeping track? And I totally get your confusion. You’ve known him your whole life, it makes barely any sense for me to be here,” relief flooding through my body that he wasn’t offended.

He opened the door to the building for me, and I went up to the front desk to talk to the receptionist. I said, “Hi, we’re here for a meeting with Hotch?”, so the woman typed something on her computer and said, “Yep, he’ll be ready for you in about fifteen minutes,�� with a big smile on her face. I thanked her quietly, then sat down in the waiting room next to Spencer, and it was quiet for a while, him fiddling with his jacket sleeves and me tapping on my legs to the tune of “Sweet Caroline”.

I finally broke the silence and asked, “Where are you from?”, which startled him before he cleared his throat and said, “Vegas. I moved out here the second I turned eighteen, though. You?”, so I replied, “Boulder, about an hour west of here. I moved to Chicago for college, though, then got a full-time job a little while after I graduated, so I didn’t get the chance to come visit as often as I would have liked,” making him nod understandingly. He asked, “What was your major?”, and I said, “Finance with a hospitality minor. I’ve been an accountant for about four years now,” earning an impressed nod from him. I almost said something else, but the receptionist called out, “Dr. Reid and Miss L/N?”, so the two of us stood up, and she led us back to Hotch’s office.

The receptionist poked her head in the door and said, “Your ten-thirty is here, Hotch,” and I heard his deep voice reply, “Thank you, Elle. Send them in,” before she opened the door a bit more, smiled at us, then trotted back to the front desk, where I could vaguely hear the phone ringing. Hotch adjusted his reading glasses, then gestured for us to sit down, so I took a seat in one of the chairs in front of his desk, Spencer following suit. Hotch folded his hands on his desk, then said, “Thank you both for coming. Shall we get started?”, making Spencer and I look at each other before looking back at Hotch and nodding our assent.

Hotch pulled a fairly small packet of paper out of a manilla envelope, then began to read out loud: “The last will and testament of Jason Benjamin Gideon. I, Jason Gideon, hereby bequeath Chickadee the Appaloosa horse to my beloved niece, Ms. Y/N M/N L/N, for she was always her favorite,” which made me smile, because Chickadee was, in fact, my favorite horse at Sparrow Creek. Hotch continued reading, “I also bequeath Nelson the American Quarter Horse to my protegée, Dr. Spencer Walter Tristan Reid, so that he may continue to work on his horse riding skills with a trusted partner,” and the corner of Spencer’s mouth quirked up at that sentiment.

Then Hotch got to the part I was most interested in; namely, who got the ranch. He read, “Now, the subject of my most beloved estate, Sparrow Creek, and its accompanying businesses and assets,” then he hesitated and looked up at the two of us with what I swear was nervousness in his eyes, but I disregarded it and leaned forward in my seat slightly. Hotch took a deep breath, then continued, “I, Jason Gideon, hereby leave Sparrow Creek and all equity involved to my beloved niece, Ms. Y/N M/N L/N, but only under these conditions,” which made me wrinkle my eyebrows and make eye contact with Spencer, who looked just as confused as I did.

Then Hotch said what was probably the worst thing I’ve heard since I was informed of Uncle Jason’s passing: “Ms. L/N must remain at Sparrow Creek full-time for an entire year, and work alongside Dr. Reid on a day-to-day basis to ensure the prosperity of the ranch. If these conditions are not met, Sparrow Creek and all its equity will pass in full to my protegée, Dr. Spencer Walter Tristan Reid,” and my jaw just about hit the floor in indignance. Hotch set the packet of paper on his desk and looked up at us without saying anything, and all I could hear was my own heartbeat pounding in my ear. Spencer said, “That’s it?”, and Hotch confirmed, “That’s it. Anything you need me to clarify?”, which made me stand up and storm out of his office, steam practically pouring out of my ears.

Once I made it outside, I started pacing back and forth on the sidewalk, and I’m sure it was quite the scene for any pedestrians who happened to be walking by. A stream of obscenities came out of my mouth in an enraged mutter as I attempted to calm myself down, but when Spencer emerged from the building, my rage boiled over and before he could finish saying, “What happened back there?”, I screamed, “What in the actual FUCK WAS HE THINKING?!?!”, which made him fall silent and stare at me like I’d just grown two extra heads.

I rambled, “My entire life, Uncle Jason told me that one day I’d be in charge of Sparrow Creek, and that it would be the greatest joy of his life to hand it down to someone who truly loved the family business. Now he decides that some random city boy he’s only known for five years gets the whole kit and caboodle if I screw the pooch?! WHAT THE FUCK?!?!?!”, getting angrier and angrier until it exploded out of me and I kicked the first solid object I saw (which happened to be a metal trash can that made a loud reverberating sound like a gong when the reinforced toe of my boot made contact with it) before I continued pacing.

Spencer’s face hardened, and then he said, “Maybe he thought since you weren’t around enough, you wouldn’t be able to handle it. Maybe he was giving you one last chance to prove yourself, and he was making sure the ranch would pass on to someone who knew what they were doing in case you couldn’t take the heat,” which made me stop dead in my tracks, and slowly turn towards him while saying, “What the hell did you just say to me?”, a deadly chill in my voice that even scared me a little.

Spencer stiffened a little bit, then leaned forward slightly so he was all up in my face (asshole) and said, “Gideon put safeguards in place to make sure someone competent gets the ranch if you fuck up, Princess,” which made my nostrils flare before I snapped, “Don’t call me that,” and glared at him. After a momentary stare-down between the two of us, I rolled my eyes and said, “Whatever. I have to go, I gotta make a few calls before my flight back to Chicago tomorrow night,” while starting to walk back to the pick-up truck I borrowed from the ranch.

Spencer called out, “Awww, throwing in the towel before you even start the race, Princess?”, and the holier-than-thou tone of his voice made me want to punch his lights out, but I composed myself, plastered on a sickly sweet smile, then turned around to face him before saying, “Oh no. I hate to disappoint you, but I’m only going back to pack up my stuff, sublet my apartment, and put in a request for indefinite remote assignments from my accounting firm before renting a U-Haul and coming right back here. If you think for even one millisecond that I’m not gonna fight tooth and nail for something I’ve been waiting my entire life for? Then you better hold onto your ass with both hands, Einstein,” and if only I had a photographic memory to keep the way his smug smile dropped off his face in my brain forever.

I scrunched my nose at him the way the mean girls did in early 2000s movies, then said, “Better get a calendar and pen ready, Doc,” before sarcastically blowing him a kiss, climbing into the truck, and starting the drive back to the ranch. I caught a glimpse of him standing dumbfounded on the sidewalk in the rearview mirror, and I couldn’t help but laugh out loud, because I was going to make Dr. Spencer Reid regret ever underestimating me, and have a smile on my face the entire time I did so.

———————————————————————

CM Taglist: @homoose, @libraryofloveletters, @xgoldentigerlilyx, @less-intelligent-spencerreid, @boketto2-0, @aryaarathornson, @spoookymuulders, @nomajdetective

Let me know in the comments if you want to be added

[nanowrimo]

5 Techniques to Help You Write Your Novel

Every writing project is unique, and the methods that help you draft one novel may not work for another. If you’re getting started on a brand new project this Camp, NaNo Guest Vee James has some suggestions for different techniques to help you explore your story. It took a few NaNos before I realized I was developing different techniques each time I sat down to the challenge. I think we all do this naturally, but it helps to step back and observe the process. If you’re strictly a pantster, you’ve been working on the story ideas in your head. If you’re a planner, you’ve set to paper the story concepts, characters, and an outline of what you are about to produce on paper. Some people take a hybrid approach to NaNo. Granted, the basics remain the same: butt in chair, accomplish the hourly/daily goal, and allow yourself to tell your story.

I discovered that each unique novel presented particular challenges, and I had to adapt my style and writing techniques in order to explore the story and keep the production happening. Some of these came from writing instructors and wonderful podcasters. Some came from “how to write” seminars and workshops. Others grew out of a feverish search for “more words.”

Here are five techniques I’ve found that helped me advance writing projects:

1. Research

It was a surprise to me to discover the concept of researching for fiction. I initially thought, “Just make something up.” But there are so many ways to broaden your approach. Plumb your memory, take a course in something related to the story, talk to an expert, and ask lots of questions. You could even become like the character in order to feel what they feel. If you’re writing a western, go ride a horse.

2. Write Scenes Out of Order

If you have a premise, you’ve already got scenes in your mind. Don’t wait until you get to chapter 18. Write that scene now. You can always revise it when you catch up to that point and it gives you something to develop toward. To expand on this technique, when you’ve written the scene, ask yourself, “What happened just before this?” or “What does this scene lead to?”

3. Put disparate characters together and have them have a conversation

Often, we write secondary characters who take a more subdued role in the plot. But what would happen if your protagonist’s best friend had a conversation with the main antagonist? Or if the antagonist’s agent of destruction came upon the protagonist’s love interest? In my experience, these conversations frequently produce more depth in your secondary characters and almost always it’s something you weren’t expecting.

4. Play with Genre Tropes

What have you chosen to write? Urban fiction? SciFi? Fantasy? You already know what your reader expects you to write, and what the plot ahead holds for them. How can you twist it? Sometimes the simplest thing you mentioned in chapter one can be the linchpin of a great plot twist.

5. Study Film

It’s no accident that some of the most astounding stories have been told through film. Quite simply, movie companies invest heavily in every aspect of their production and hire some of the best writers around. Yes, it’s a visual medium and has some advantages over prose. But the main lesson with movies is in the structure of the stories they tell. Here’s a good example: when I was writing a fairytale novel, I wanted to stay true to the classic story structure. One afternoon I was watching the comedy, Galaxy Quest, taking careful notes on the structure. I realized the story structure mapped very closely to what I was doing in the fairytale. It was comforting to see this, and it also gave me some ideas on how to approach the ending.

Most importantly: NaNoWriMo is a thrilling if exhaustive experience, and I urge you to immerse yourself in it completely. Write with utter abandon, delve deep for concepts that will give you the next 2000 words, and try new things like you’re a Mad Scientist in a hurry. We all know that what you end up with is a messy creation. But you will find you have given yourself a great gift.

Vee James is a cross-genre author who loves to write comedies, fairytales, and YA supernatural. He participated in NaNoWriMo for ten years in a row, writing over a half-million words, and it led to nine NaNo novels plus two more non-NaNos. Out of this work, he’s published four novels, with a fifth nearing completion. If interested, visit his site at www.veejames.com and leave a message. He loves to talk to writers of all kinds. Vee's photo by A. Roger Hammons Photo by Daniel Álvasd on Unsplash

[cinewhore]

The Duchess of London

Pairing: Thomas “Tommy” Shelby x fem!reader

Word Count: 3.8k

Warnings: angst, mentions of drinking, drugs, blood, gore, sexual assault (not detailed), fighting, guns, smut (penetration, creampie, wrap it up lads!), fluff. 

A/N: The PB bug bit me and it bit me hard! Had to get this out. Takes place in season 2. Reminder that this is a bit dark given the contents of the show so if something rubs you the wrong way, don’t read it! You also don’t need to provide an explanation as to why you won’t read it, just keep scrolling. No beta cause I said so. Enjoy! Credits to the gif artist. 

Birmingham smelled like shit.

London smelled worse.

You thank your bodyguard as he helps you out of the car, careful not to drag your dress along the mud, it was brand new and you didn’t have the best relationship with the new seamstress that replaced your old one.

It was a strange thing, being back home. Your old stomping grounds. You remember the days fondly, racing up and down the roads, dashing through the traffic of folks who populated the area. You always found yourself somewhere you shouldn’t be, getting scolded by your aunt when you arrived home well past dark. There’s a slight twinge in your chest as you reminisce, desperately wishing you could go back.

Luckily, your old house wasn’t far from your lodgings, Rich spooked by the rumors of how lawless this part of town was. You couldn’t blame him, Birmingham had long been abandoned by any sense of law and order. The police only came when it benefited them, so the local organized crime had taken over.

“Rich, I’ll only be a few minutes. Keep the car running.” you instruct. The burly man nods in respect.

“Yes ma’am.” He tips his hat at you, heading back to the car.

It was a choice, coming back here. There were nothing but terrible memories you worked too hard to forget but you felt like you owed it to yourself and your aunt to come back. The house was exactly how you remembered it, sparse furnishings but warm with spirit.

Now it was half empty and lonely.

You were fast in your approach to gather anything you deemed important, the house was likely going to be cleaned and left up for rent. Photographs, scraps of clothing, broken china were all stuffed into a bag you brought with you. These were the broken fragments of your old life you weren’t ready to part ways with just yet.

After muttering a quick prayer for your aunt and hoping that the devil caught your uncle, you say goodbye to the Brimingham girl you used to be.

You needed a fucking drink.

You swagger into the Garrison, amused at the drunken men shouting across each other. You’re well aware of the stares you were receiving, knowing that a woman of your stature and style could only mean two things: you were a well off prostitute or the lavish wife of a man no one wanted to fuck with.

You took pride in being neither.

A man with a kind face smiles at you from behind the bar, throwing a white towel across his shoulder.

“What can I get you, love?”

“Whiskey. Neat.”

“What kind?”

You pretend to think about it. “Surprise me.”

The kind man chuckles to himself before hustling to get your drink. You dig around in your purse, pulling out a few bills that were much more than your drink likely cost. A hand covers your own as you slide the bills across the bar and you gaze up into a familiar face.

“I heard whispers about a very rich looking person coming into town, you wouldn’t have happened to see anything, have you?”

You couldn’t forget those piercing blue eyes even if you tried.

Suppressing a smile, you take the glass set in front of you and drain it quickly before gesturing for a refill. Tommy waves his hand at the barkeep.

“Get a bottle and bring it in the room.” he instructs, ushering you into the private area where he conducts business.

You follow behind him, silently thanking him as he pulls out a seat for you.

The two of you don’t say a word as he pours you another drink, cigarette dangling from the corner of his mouth.

“Thomas fucking Shelby.” you finally murmur, overcome with nostalgia. “How long has it been?”

Tommy gives a half shrug. “More than ten years, I’d say.”

“This yours?” you finally take a second to gaze about, impressed with the architecture. It felt like too beautiful of a place to be in Birmingham.

“More or less. It was a gift to Arthur.”

You grin. “A gift you didn’t buy.”

“A gift, nonetheless.” he takes a long drag of the cigarette, cautious as he blows the smoke out of his nose and in a direction that wasn’t facing you. “Heard about your uncle.”

You nod, posture stiffening. “May his soul rot.”

Tommy raises his eyebrows and his glass, downing his drink. “Cheers.”

“So,” you lean back in your seat. “What has Thomas Shelby been up to all these years?”

Tommy mimics your actions, scratching at his face. “Making business happen. Staying out of trouble.”

“You’re trying to be legal?” your curiosity piqued.

“Something like that.” He holds his arms out wide. “We’re expanding.”

“Into London. Fucking with the status quo there, I heard.”

Something in Tommy’s face hardens and he regards you with contempt. “Is that so?”

“It’s kind of my business to know. You are stepping into my turf. I don’t give a shit either way, this feud you have with the Italians is kind of good for business.”

“How?”

You take out a cigarette of your own, a long black cigarette holder accompanying it. Thomas doesn’t take his eyes off of you as he strikes a match, watching your mouth closely as you take a few drags. “People are far too concerned if there’s war coming to worry about women and their petty activities. Makes it easier to get into their pockets.”

“Did someone send you here?” He asks slowly, a tiny gun appearing on the table.

You chuckle, shaking your head. “No. As I have mentioned, I’m not interested in whatever dick measuring contest you have going on with Sabini. I’m just a girl who came to dance on her dead uncle’s grave.”

Tommy can tell that you’re being honest. It was refreshing but strange, he wasn’t one to openly trust people. You were the one person who didn’t care about what he was doing in a sea of people who questioned his every move.

“Dick measuring contest, eh?”

You had been fucked well before, sometimes from other women but nothing compared to how well Thomas Shelby was fucking you now.

His home was modest, clean cut and devoid of character. You were currently bent over on his bed being hastily taken from behind. It was as if he had just returned home from the war, eager and hungry for a woman’s touch. He couldn’t get enough.

Tommy staggers backwards, tapping your ass to get your attention.

“Fucking come here.” he rasps out and you giggle as he moves papers off a desk in the corner, hauling you on top of it. You spread your legs so he could slot himself in between them, entering you again with no hesitation.

“Don’t step on my dress.” you moan out, crossing your legs along his back.

“That, shit, all you care about now?” Tommy hisses, placing a hand on your hip to keep you still.

You nod furiously, leaning your head back against the wall and closing your eyes. You had already come undone twice and felt the third emerging soon.

“Fuck,” Tommy pants, taking his other hand and wrapping it around your throat. You loved the feeling of being choked and worked hard to memorize the touch of his fingers squeezing your skin. “I’ll buy you another dress. I’ll buy the fucking dress factory. You’d like that, wouldn’t you?”

“Yes, fuck yes, Tommy.” You tighten around his cock as you come again, causing him to groan and weaken his stamina. “I want you to give me everything I ask for.”

“What do you want, hm?” He questions, making sure to maintain eye contact with you. It was difficult to keep your eyes open but you’d be damned if you didn’t try.

“I want your cum, all of it. I want you to empty your balls,” you reach a hand down for added effect. “Into my cunt.”

And just like that, Tommy thrusts into you forcefully twice more before coming to completion. You both groan at the sensation, the trickling of his seed oozing out of you and down your thigh. He rests his head against your shoulder, breathing heavily. You allow your legs to go slack, wincing at how stiff they had gotten.

After a moment of rest, Tommy helps you into bed where the two of you take the time to decompress.

“You’re marked.” Thomas comments, trailing a finger down the scar on the back of your left shoulder. It was in the shape of the number four, a reminder of what - who - you belonged to.

Joining the Forty Elephants was an honest mistake. When you arrived and couldn’t secure a place on your own, you resorted to petty theft just like any other low class person in your position. It had been the wrong place at the wrong time. You slipped inside of a clothing store, hoping to pick up a few nice shirts so you could find a steady job that wasn’t walking the streets at night. Turns out the Forty Elephants were at the height of a heist and you barged right into the middle of it.

You were caught and arrested with three other women. You begged and pleaded with the police, urging them to believe you when you said you were acting out on your own. You were all jailed together and you spent the night getting the living daylights kicked out of you. The next morning, the four of you were released and you were handed off to the leader of the up and coming gang.

“Some fucking runt you are.” She spat, sizing you up. You were interrogated relentlessly, the boss lady, Mary, assuming you were sent in by a rival gang to screw them up on purpose. When you justified your case, she nodded. You were brought in, taken care of and most importantly, you were protected.

You made nice with the other girls and became a skilled pickpocket, lock picker and seductress. The nickname “duchess” came after you managed to lift a hefty sum, including a car, from a duke. It was then you elevated your style and sense of purpose. You began to educate yourself, investing in legal companies and stockpiling your wealth for a rainy day.

You knew that life with the Elephants wouldn’t last forever and you needed a way out when the time came.

“It was my initiation.” You tell Tommy, breath catching slightly as his touch made you shiver.

He hums, pressing a small kiss to it. “I saw you that night.”

You frown, flipping over on your side to face him. He invites you to lay closer and you gingerly accept his invitation, perching yourself on his chest. “What do you mean?”

Tommy takes another puff from his cigarette before answering. “When you left Birmingham. It was at night. I was taking a walk with my brothers, and saw you scrambling to get out of the house. You ran like a bat out of hell. Never looked back once.”

“Oh.” You look down at your fingers, absentmindedly stroking the tattoo on his chest. You take a second to formulate a response, unsure of how to answer after years of not speaking about it. Tommy doesn’t push, waiting patiently for an answer that may never come.

After a moment of silence, you give him one. “He said I reminded him of her. Before she died, he was cold and distant. Afterwards, it was as if I had taken her place. It wasn’t the first time it happened. I remember crying a lot after. But that night, for whatever reason, I was determined to make it the last.”

You swallow thickly, brows furrowed as you replay the scene in your head. “I waited on him. Nearly fell asleep but like clockwork, he came creeping in the wee hours of the morning. I managed to stab him five times before I got away.”

Maneuvering yourself out of Tommy’s arms, you straddle him instead, pinpointing all the places you cut your uncle.

“Twice here.” You tap at his right peck with your finger. “Once in the stomach, once in the arm and once on his shoulder. He was a big guy and it was as if it didn’t faze him. Killing him didn’t matter at that point, I just wanted to be gone. So, I ran. Everyday for years, I kept looking over my shoulder, sure that he was going to show up and try to take me home. I hated myself. He got to live out his life and I suffered because of him.”

The tears surprised you as they dripped down your cheeks, hot and constant. Tommy is bemused as he wipes them away, his face never changing. You always pondered on who Tommy really was and what went on underneath the mask he was wearing. Then again, perhaps there was no mask to begin with.

“It’s stupid, I know.” you continue, hurriedly swiping at your eyes.

“It’s not. You did what you needed to do, what you thought was right. No one can ever blame you for that.”

“Funny, coming from a Peaky Blinder.” you chide with a small grin.

“Even funnier, coming from an Elephant.” he retorts without wasting a breath.

You sigh, placing your hands against his broad chest. “Cut from the same cloth, are we?”

Tommy nods, setting the now stub of a cigarette out in the ashtray placed on the nightstand. He turns his attention back to you, mind racing as he studies your features. How he let you slip away, how he went years without seeking you out plagued him from time to time. You were elusive, a mirage of a seemingly perfect woman he shouldn't taint with his touch. You’ve grown into your features, personality blossoming. You weren’t subservient like many of the other women he had encountered, all who would bat their eyelashes at him in hopes that they would get picked to be with a real gangster.

“Stay. I have an opening in my office, we could use the help. You’d straighten out Arthur, no doubt.”

You scoff, running a hand through his hair. “I don’t want to be a guard dog or a bloody receptionist, Tommy. Besides, I’m expected back in London tomorrow.”

“Why?”

“Family business.”

Tommy lights another cigarette at that.

“You could come with me. I wouldn’t force you to stay but maybe just to take your mind off of things?”

“Can’t. Family business.”

You laugh quietly, shrugging your shoulders. “What we wouldn’t do for those we love.”

The walk home from Tommy’s is uneventful, both basking in each other’s silence. It was comfortable and intimate, the only thing interrupting it was the sound of children out playing far too late and drunken men hurling commentary out at anyone that walked by them.

The folks of Brimingham were familiar with the Shelby’s but they aren't familiar with you which is how you became a prime target for unwanted advances. The man had to have been well beyond plastered, for any woman seen with Tommy was assumed to be his.

You couldn’t even understand half of what the agitated bloke was saying, just that he was making weird gestures with hands, pretending to jerk himself off. Others had attempted to warn him and even Tommy moved in for the kill but you stopped him.

“No, no. I want to hear what this lad has to say. What’s this then? You wanna have a go with me? Is this how you approach all the women you like?”

You feign boredom, sticking both hands in the pockets of your coat. You rummage around in your right pocket, discreetly slipping your fingers into the holes of a brass knuckle.

“Yeah, it is. Now, when you’re done with this half starved looking bastard, how about you come home with a real man who can fuck you until-”

Your movements were swift and graceful, as if you had done this a hundred times before. The knuckles smash into the poor man’s face, instantly cracking and breaking his nose. Tumbling onto the ground, you crouch over the drunkard and wail on him until splatters of blood dot your face like a painting.

Tommy watches as you all but kill this man with your bare hands and does absolutely nothing. His overwhelming glare warned the others to back off while you continued, the bystanders knowing what their fate could look like should they interfere.

Panting, you back off the guy, using your free hand to wipe at your face. You spit, step across the moaning body and proceed towards your lodgings as if nothing occurred. Tommy falls in step with you, offering a handkerchief which you accept. While the Forty Elephants appeared to be harmless with crimes of shoplifting and bribery, you had a more rampageous approach to it all. The streets of London had toughened you, like it or not.

At the end of the day, you needed to make sure that you could take care of yourself and if it meant taking another person’s life, so be it.

Tommy had never wanted you more. But nothing good could come out of the two of you being together, you both knew that. It would be similar to chaining two wild dogs together and expecting them not to bite each other's necks off when there’s only enough food for one.

You had the Elephants and London. He had Brimingham and the Blinders. Somewhere, you would meet in the middle but there wasn’t room for overlap. Tommy was sure that being wed to an Elephant meant more turf and control but he wouldn’t dare do that to you. He couldn’t do it to himself. He would come to you whenever he wanted and you’d do the same to him.

Rich straightens up upon seeing your silhouette, clasping his hands together in front of him obediently. He takes one look at your face and reaches inside his coat to grab his gun when you raise a hand out.

“S’alright. Just had a little accident. You know Tommy.”

Rich gives Tommy a once over before relaxing.

“Shall I see you inside, then?”

You gesture at Rich to go on ahead of you, planting yourself firmly in front of Thomas. “No, I think it’s better if we say our goodbyes out here.”

Tommy smiles briefly, lighting yet another cigarette. “You don’t trust me?”

“I don’t trust that I’ll make it back to London tomorrow if you do come up.”

He takes a small step towards you, jawline rigid as he exhales through his nose. “I could leave early, before you wake up.”

“I wouldn’t allow you to.” Plucking the flaming stick out his mouth, you press a wistful kiss to his lips, melting into his embrace as he deepens it.

Hesitant to pull away, you ease back reluctantly. Your hands smooth his across his coat, reaching upwards to tug at his beloved hat.

“When you’re in London, I expect a call.”

Thomas rests his forehead against yours, licking at his dried lips. “I’ll always make sure to pay the Duchess a visit.”

You peck his lips one last time before returning the cigarette. Tommy watches as you disappear inside the hotel, satisfied knowing that you were safe and back in your room. Doubling back to the Garrison, now in full swing for the night, he gets welcomed with a drink from John and a pat on the back from Arthur.

“Tell me brother, what’s it like to be with royalty, eh? Is her pussy made out of gold?” Arthur cracks himself up, thoroughly entertained by his own quip.

“Fuck off, Arthur.” Tommy says dryly, taking a swig of whiskey.

“Did you tell her?”

Tommy raises an eyebrow at John. “Tell her what?”

“About her fuckin’ uncle?”

Tommy doesn’t answer and the two brothers give each other a glance.

“Bloody hell, Tommy-” Arthur starts. Tommy raises a hand and waves him off.

“Of course I didn’t fucking tell her. All that matters is that he’s in the ground, eh? Now get me another bottle and stop whining in my fucking ear.”

Arthur is slow as he departs from his sibling, a lopsided smirk plaguing his face.

Tommy thinks to himself that maybe he should’ve mentioned how your uncle actually died. You were told that he had a nasty fall after a night out of heavy drinking. In reality, it was the Peaky Blinders doing. Not only was your uncle a piece of shit, he also had a gambling problem. He got mixed in with the wrong folks and unknowingly stole money from the Blinders to help pay off a gambling debt. He was sloppy in execution which caught the attention of Tommy.

Upon finding out who actually took his money, Tommy made it a personal mission to seek him out. The man, Ronald, folded like a chair when Tommy and the boys appeared on his doorstep. He cried and begged for mercy, which they showed him none. Especially not after he confessed what he had done to you.

Ronald knew you made it to London and had fallen into some money, so whenever he got into debt he just told people that you were wealthy and would deliver money for his payments. Even after you cut ties with him and tried to kill him, he proceeded to use you.

Tommy wouldn’t have it.

“Oi! Tommy!” Arthur returns with the bottle in hand. “You got any spare cash on ya? I wanna set up a quick date with Beatrice.”

Tommy looks at his brother with slight disdain and rolls his eyes. “I’m not your accountant.”

“Yeah, yeah. I left my wad back at the office. Just cough it up, would ya?”

“If it means I won’t have to look at your face anymore, fine.”

Tommy reaches inside his pants pocket where he normally keeps an emergency stack and finds it empty. Scowling, Tommy pats himself down extensively before the light bulb goes off.

He laughs.

Not a cheeky snicker or a lame jest. Thomas Shelby actually laughs.

Confused but willing to follow his brother anywhere, Arthur begins to laugh as well until they’re both hanging onto each other, gasping for air.

At the hotel, you answer the door to your room, thanking the bellboy for bringing up your dinner. Tucking a hand in your bra, a wad of cash spills out. You grab a handful of it and place it into the hand of the blushing young man. He stammers out a thank you, hightailing it back to the lobby.

You get comfortable in bed, eager to dive into the captivating spread laid out in front of you. Closing your eyes, you fold your hands in front of you in mock prayer.

“Thank you dear lord for this appetizing food and for the Peaky fucking Blinders. Amen.”

[deebrisbyfish]

An Abandoned Homage...

So, it’s no secret that I LOVE making homages to my favorite cartoonists and comic artists for “Finding Dee”. I’ve done a bunch for strips that inspired me such as “Garfield”, “Peanuts”, “Calvin & Hobbes” and more. I’ve also done a few for different styles of comics, like the work of Mike Mignola, Walter Simonson and even Al Williamson. Those, however, are a little different. In those, the “model” for my cartoon avatar is basically still the way I draw it, with the rendering style of the artists I admire pasted over them. Those are kinda more… style OVERLAYS as opposed to direct style homages. And, it turns out, there’s a very good REASON for this. A reason that became abundantly clear with a strip idea that has since been abandoned. See the above piece… That was to be an homage to Frank Miller’s classic “Batman: The Dark Knight Returns”. It was a massively influential book on me and one I had a script for a strip that I wanted to homage. This was… to put it mildly… as far as I got. This was the 3rd attempt, with the first two having proportions MUCH closer to Miller's famous cover of issue #2 of DKR. Those I outright loathed seeing, so I altered the proportions more to my own model sheet, trying instead to just overlay the rough, craggly line style Miller used on the comic. This was coming out fine, but was causing me some AGRESSIVELY uncomfortable gender dysphoria drawing. I couldn't look at it without seeing the image I really try to NOT see when I look in the mirror, and not in a good way. It was making me hear every jerk and transphobe snickering in the back of my mind, and that is NOT a good or healthy thing. I poured over Miller’s work, and found a remarkably thin selection of women that weren’t his specific brand of hyper-sexualized cartooning or… well… women that looked like bloated tree trunks. There was not a lot of middle ground. I did not want to draw an entire comic strip where, in order to homage the Dark Knight Returns, I had to draw myself like a gnarled, knotted rhino-mutation. That would NOT do well with my sense of self-esteem. I mean, I’m not always kind to myself in cartoon form, but I’m not this:

Curse you, TCRI!!

Now, and I say this KNOWING it will be more controversial, this is the same reason I’ve yet to pull off a Jack Kirby homage. I could homage his stylistic quirks and rendering style, but to try and draw MYSELF like a Kirby woman would be… unsettling. The King drew a LOT of lovely ladies, but anyone that wasn’t a pin-up model started looking a smidge on the... rough side, too. So, if you’re wondering why I almost EXCLUSIVELY homage comic STRIP and cartoony artists when I do homages, this is a BIG part of why. I don’t mind drawing myself like a potato. I just don’t want that potato to look like it was grown in Chernobyl.

[lutiaslayton]

Professor Layton and the Eternal Diva

ＰＡＲＴ　１９

〚ＦＩＲＳＴ〛〚ＰＲＥＶ〛〚ＮＥＸＴ〛

Disclaimer: This is a fan-translation for the Japan-exclusive novellisation of the movie Professor Layton and the Eternal Diva. The original novel was written by Aya Matsui under the supervision of Akihiro Hino, and belongs to Level-5.

This translation only aims to be a pleasant read for non-Japanese fans, nothing more: I made a few deliberate changes while translating in order to get the writing style closer to what is usually found in English fanfictions, as the Japanese storytelling can sometimes be different than what we are used to.

── London・Present

＊ Reunion

After Janice’s voice faded away, I remained pensive for a while.

Three years ago.

The moment I met her, I was left in awe.

She was a beautiful woman, much older than me…

But at that time, was it Melina that left such a big impression on me?

Or was it Janice…?

This is one of the puzzles that I have yet to solve.

This had been my first adventure with the professor, and it was a very special one for me.

‘Mr Future Gentleman’

I thought I had just heard her voice again.

“Look, Luke.”

The professor’s voice brought me back to myself. He had two tickets to the ‘Eternal Kingdom’ opera in hand.

It really was just like that time from three years ago.

Though of course, the name of the venue on the ticket was not the ‘Crown Petone’ this time.

Mr Whistler’s face came to my mind.

According to Inspector Grosky, he sometimes plays the piano in prison, bringing tears to the eyes of his fellow inmates.

I heard through the grapevine that Captain O’Donnell and Mr Marco Brock have hit it off since the incident, and often travel together.

Amelia is currently studying abroad at a foreign university.

The letter I received the other day said that she was still very grateful that the professor and I had attended her grandfather’s funeral.

Nina sometimes comes to visit us here, at Gressenheller. She has a very good memory and studies very hard, and I think she might be admitted to college before me…

But I won’t lose to her. Look out for the Future Gentleman and puzzle master, Nina!

Oh, that’s right, Mr Starbuck and Mrs Raidley had their wedding just the other day. The gossip magazines made it a really big deal.

And I’m currently reading Annie Dretche’s latest mystery. I’m so excited, I can’t stop reading it!

Annie once told me that she has been writing mysteries much faster than before for the sake of Mr Bargland. That way, he would have something to read while he spends his spare time at the hospital…

And then…

There was a knock at the door. Who could it be? Perhaps a client for some new exciting mystery to solve.

The professor and I got up from our chairs at the same time and headed for the entrance.

But as soon as I opened the door, my heart skipped a beat.

“Janice…”

I was dazzled by her smile. It looked just like the one I had seen three years ago…

　⇚　　　　　　　↛

And this completes the fan-translation of the official Eternal Diva novel, everyone! Man, this sure was something. A lot of work, a lot of tears and sweat, a lot of good surprises. Who knows what the future has in store for us now!

...Hm? What's that? Another novel? Let's see...We've seen a lot of blue lately, perhaps a change of colour would do us all some good. How about green? Green sounds nice, right?

Yup. Illusory Forest it is, baby. See y'all next week for a brand new adventure, and one that most of you never have gotten to experience before at that 👀

Oh, also, I'm just going to say before we let Ambrosia go back to its eternal sleep: this thing has followed me up until the very end of my PhD. I defended my thesis, like. TODAY. Just A FEW HOURS AGO.

At the exact time this post is coming out, I am likely going to still be stuck at the lab managing the mini-quiches for the party or something of the like, hahaha. So... yeah, I guess I'm a doctor now? In theoretical chemistry, that is. Yay? Yeah, let's go with yay :D

(and I hope that future me won't happen to be told a random "actually no ur work sucks you failed lol" on that very day and the party prevents me from editing this post in order to bring the bad news, that'd be awkward lmao)

[annieqattheperipheral]

I WANNA HEAR FROM THIS DUDE. Give him an entire hour of anonymity, let's hear it all

⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️

TW: skate blade injury, medical, emergency, blood, bruise

Ok this is an EXCELLENT article about neck guards and cut-resistant turtleneck undershirts.

please read to the end. Dr Hayley Wickenheiser provides incredible insight about freak accidents and the medical emergency process that shifts the article a couple of times.

$wall: After Adam Johnson's death, will 'stubborn' NHL players embrace neck-protective gear?

A little more than a year ago, T.J. Oshie read a story about a young boy who was cut in the neck by a skate blade during a youth hockey game. Almost instinctively, Oshie reached for his phone and contacted his partners at Warroad, the hockey apparel company he helped found six years ago. What started as a way to create undershirts that weren’t itchy and irritating had developed into a safety-conscious business that helped develop new, cut-resistant fabrics to protect players’ wrists and Achilles tendons.

Now, Oshie wanted turtlenecks to protect the most dangerously exposed part of a hockey player’s body — their neck, and the carotid artery within. Sure enough, Warroad came up with a sleek turtleneck with its “tilo” design, which includes cut-resistant panels built into the fabric.

It worked.

And Oshie still didn’t wear them.

In fact, he doesn’t believe a single player in the NHL wears anything of the sort. None of the bulky neck guards that are mandatory in the Quebec Major Junior Hockey League and Ontario Hockey League (but not the Western Hockey League). None of the Kevlar-style fabric turtlenecks that are becoming more readily available all the time, from companies such as Warroad, AYCANE, and Cut-Tex Pro.

Players have their reasons. Oshie said NHL rinks are “hotter” than ever, with guys sweating through several undershirts a game, and the thought of wearing a turtleneck in such a warm environment is unappealing. Players are superstitious, wearing the same shoulder pads they used in juniors, using the same brand of skate they’ve worn since they were kids, using the same tape job and knob style they’ve used forever. And, well, turtlenecks and neck guards don’t look cool. Heck, only Wayne Gretzky and Tomas Plekanec ever really pulled off the look.

“It’s not a cool look having neck guards on,” Oshie said. “For whatever reason, it’s just not something that’s sleek and looks great.”

But then Oshie learned about Adam Johnson’s death on Saturday night. Johnson, a former player for the Pittsburgh Penguins, was cut in the neck by a skate blade during a game in England and died, shaking the hockey community to its core. Players and coaches from around the league expressed their heartbreak over the tragedy. But Oshie did more than that.

He ordered five Tilo turtlenecks from his company. One for him and four for some of his teammates to try. They’ll arrive on Monday. And he’s going to try playing in them. Because Johnson’s death did more than devastate the hockey world. It opened the hockey world’s eyes to an inherent — and possibly preventable — life-threatening risk that comes with playing the game.

At any level.

“I just wish these things never had to be made, and injuries like this would never happen, because it’s so sad,” Oshie said on his way to the Capitals’ game against the Sharks on Sunday evening. “It hits me pretty hard, just thinking about my kids. I could take one to the neck tonight. And for them to not have a father — it’s just so sad and it makes me think twice about protecting myself and my neck out there. Whether it looks cool or not.”

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Jason Dickinson didn’t know what had happened to Boston’s Jakub Lauko last Tuesday at the United Center, he only knew that it looked gruesome. One of Dickinson’s Chicago teammates asked him what had happened and Dickinson speculated that Lauko had hit his head on the boards and “split open.”

After the game, Lauko’s bloodied face was still a topic of conversation in the Blackhawks dressing room. Dickinson heard someone say that it was a skate blade that caught Lauko in the area of his left eye.

“A skate?” Dickinson said. “How did that happen?”

“It was your skate!” a teammate told him.

“Are you kidding me?” Dickinson responded. “When?”

It had happened when Dickinson was falling into the boards after a push from Boston’s John Beecher. Lauko was already down on all fours, and Dickinson’s skate caught him in the face. As mangled as his face was in the aftermath, Lauko was extraordinarily lucky the skate missed his eye. Dickinson never even felt the contact.

Dickinson, after learning it was his skate, immediately checked in with the team’s medical staff to find out if Lauko was OK, and was indescribably relieved to find out he was. Dickinson’s heart went out to Johnson’s family on Sunday, but he also spared a thought for the player whose skate caught Johnson in the neck.

“I feel for (him) as well,” Dickinson said. “He’s on the other end of that and he’s going to have some stuff to work through, because that’s heavy stuff. I guarantee he feels guilty right now, even though it’s a freak accident.”

That’s a word you hear a lot when it comes to skate-cut injuries, whether it’s Pat Maroon’s skate slicing through Evander Kane’s wrist last season or Matt Cooke’s skate tearing Erik Karlsson’s Achilles tendon 10 years ago. A “freak” accident. A “freak” play.

But is it? After all, this is a game played by people moving at exceptional speeds with exceptional force wearing exceptionally dangerous weapons on their feet. If anything, it’s shocking that skate cuts don’t happen more often.

Hayley Wickenheiser, a Team Canada legend, assistant general manager for the Toronto Maple Leafs and emergency physician, bristled at the depiction of such incidents as “freak” occurrences.

“I don’t think this is a freak thing, I think it happens quite a lot,” she said. “It’s just the injuries are superficial, or the players are lucky. This isn’t something that doesn’t happen; it happens a lot in hockey. Sticks come up, skates come up, and the neck is very susceptible. So whatever we can do to make (neck protection) more mainstream and just part of the equipment, the better for the future of the game. It just makes sense to me.”

Indeed, while terrifying incidents like the cuts suffered by Johnson and former Sabres goaltender Clint Malarchuk are thankfully very rare, it seems like every player has a story to tell of a close call, a near miss, a Lauko-style bit of “luck.” Dickinson took a skate on the collarbone during a game against Vegas last season and “immediately panicked,” wondering if a major artery was nicked.

“I remember the ref looked at me right away and said, ‘That was real close, Dickie,’” Dickinson said. “I’m like,’ Yeah, you’re telling me. I can f—ing feel it.”

Oshie was volunteering at a camp at his alma mater, North Dakota, some years ago, when he was rough-housing with the kids. They were dog-piling him on the ice, falling all over each other, laughing hysterically.

“Then one kid came in full speed and slid into the pile feet-first, and he actually hit me square in the face with his skate blade,” Oshie said. “So I had to get stitches above and below my eye. I still have a scar in my eyebrow that goes into my forehead. Luckily, it was flush with my face so it didn’t cut my eye.”

They can’t all be “freak” incidents, right?

“It’s unfortunate,” Blackhawks coach and 21-year NHL veteran Luke Richardson said. “It’s one of the fastest games on Earth, with razor blades on the bottom of your feet. It’s very scary and things happen quick. … I don’t know if there’s any way to guarantee that there’s going to be protection. Even if you do wear something. You can’t be in a tin can top to bottom out there for protection. It’s the risk that the pro players take.”

Richardson cited Oshie’s company as a valuable resource for players, and suggested that with time, neck protection will become normalized in the NHL. When he entered the league in 1987, there were still players playing without helmets. It took years after that for visors to become the norm to protect players’ eyes. Richardson hoped that with neck protection becoming more and more common — and mandatory — in lower leagues, it’s only a matter of time before it “graduates up” to the NHL.

Arizona center Nick Bjugstad, who played with Johnson in Pittsburgh and called him “just a kind human,” said he couldn’t bring himself to watch the video, so he doesn’t know exactly how the cut happened. But he thinks the answer is pretty obvious.

“There are times that your feet go out from under you and you don’t have control,” Bjugstad said. “As far as the precaution going forward, I’m sure it’ll be discussed in the league. It’s even more important on the youth side of things, with the lack of athletic trainers and whatnot. I hope we can figure something out as a hockey community that protects us from something so tragic happening.”

Scott Sandelin, who coached Johnson at Minnesota-Duluth, said making neck protection and Kevlar-style undergear mandatory has come up in conversations around the NCAA championship committee, with longtime Mercyhurst coach Rick Gotkin leading the charge.

“He was like, ‘Why do we wait?’” Sandelin recalled. “Why do we wait for something like this to happen before you mandate something?”

Dickinson said the NHL provided a video at the beginning of the season highlighting the benefits of cut-resistant sleeves to protect the wrists and Achilles tendons, and those have become quite popular around the league. But neck protection remains ignored by everyone other than goaltenders.

Johnson’s death surely opened some eyes around the hockey world to the risk of skate cuts to the neck, and it appeared that several Providence Bruins, in the AHL, wore neck guards on Sunday. That’s a start.

But why does it have to be a years-long process? Why can’t it happen sooner? Why do players have to be grandfathered in to avoid any mandates whenever a new equipment mandate is instituted?

“Because they’re stubborn,” said one NHL equipment manager, who was granted anonymity so he could speak freely. “It’s a monkey-see, monkey-do league. All it would take is one guy to wear it. Then two days to get used to it.”

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Wickenheiser has a similarly simple solution to getting players past all their superstitions and habits, to get them to embrace what seems like such an obvious solution to a terrifying problem.

“You just put one on,” she said. “I wore one for 20 years with the national team, it didn’t interfere with anything I did. … It’s just like anything else, when one player does it, everyone sees it and it becomes normal. I can’t even remember hockey without visors now, and I grew up watching the world of hockey without visors. I can’t even imagine not playing with a visor with how fast the game is.”

As an emergency physician and all-time hockey great, Wickenheiser is perhaps uniquely qualified to weigh in on the subject. She knows how well-stocked NHL arenas are in terms of medical care. She also knows it’s not nearly enough if, God forbid, a situation similar to what happened to Johnson happens in an NHL game. The thought has frequently crossed her mind that if there were an incident at a practice, she might be the most qualified person in the rink that day. She runs the scenarios in her mind constantly, and “it truly horrifies me.”

“You know how little time and resources you have to save a life in that moment,” she said. “The deck is entirely stacked against you as a physician. In the NHL buildings, there would be qualified physicians, there’s (emergency medical services) in the building. You have every resource at your fingertips. But what you don’t have is time. You need a surgeon and you need blood and you need time, and there’s none of those things in that moment. It’s just such a devastating injury. It freaks me out, for sure.”

It’s something players rarely think about. Can’t think about, really. Richardson said it was similar to a football player coming back from a knee injury — if you’re constantly wondering if the surgically repaired knee will hold up, you’ll never be playing at full strength and full speed. Hockey players have to feel invincible out there in order to take the risks they take on seemingly every shift.

But Oshie said there’s an instinctive, almost unthinking awareness of what your skates are doing at all times. Because the danger is always in the back of your mind, if not the front.

“I think you’re always very conscious of where your skates are when you’re playing,” he said. “I know I am. If someone’s on the ground in front of you, even if you get pushed from behind, you always get your feet out of the way, if that makes sense. It might look terrible if someone is about to fall on someone and goes knees-first, but that’s what you do instead of trying to land on your feet. I just assume that everyone else has that same mentality. But those very freak things happen. You get pushed from behind and you stay on one foot and the other foot comes up. I took a skate blade to my visor in our last preseason game, just this year. So I was a couple inches away from being cut somewhere.”

The game only gets more dangerous with each passing year. Players get bigger, stronger, faster. Skate blades are removable now, and they stay razor-sharp throughout the game, rather than dulling with each shift. Ignoring the risks won’t make them go away.

The introduction of the slap shot led to the goalie mask. Whippier sticks and more dangerous shooters made visors inevitable. Ten or 20 years from now, it’s easy to envision players regularly wearing full face shields. The Karlsson and Kane incidents, among others, helped spur the creation and popularization of wrist and ankle sleeves.

Neck protection will undoubtedly follow. It’s just a matter of when.

And if Johnson’s tragic and shocking death doesn’t prove to be enough to open eyes and open minds, then what will?

“There are options out there, and it’s not a bad idea at all,” Dickinson said. “It’s about awareness. And events like (Saturday) night, events like Kane’s, like Karlsson’s — those really make guys think and get them worried. It’s definitely something I’d consider now. I mean, who cares what it looks like? Looking lame and living is a lot better than the opposite.”

[cboffshore]

Well, less than twelve hours after wondering if I should make it: it's here, the official playlist for On Sea, Sunlight, and Sky! Cover art and everything, too.

Since Spotify doesn't allow track-by-track notes to be added, I've included commentary on each included song under the cut (as well as their names and artists so anyone who's not on Spotify can go look them up). If you're short on time, the most important thing to know is that order is not important here, as this is a rough collection of songs that either inspired or act as parallels to the series. You know, for when you want the energy of the fics without actually reading them.

Before the notes: here's the full cover art. I sourced all the illustrations from free art websites and Google listings, then edited them together and did some minor color correction in Sketchbook (on mobile, too!). I tried to go for a scrapbook style look, so I hand-cut each piece out with a rough eraser for a papery feel, then added text that I formatted in Canva, pulled the background out of, and textured.

Now: the tracklist and commentary!

"Escape Route" by Paramore: Given Nya's MO of GTFO throughout the series, I thought this would be a nice capstone track. I especially love the lines "Not quite a victory to run from your problems/But it's the only plan that I got, the only plan that I got" and "Where I'm going is everyone's story" in a meta kind of way. Where she's going - or trying to - is indeed this entire story.

"The Ballad of Mona Lisa" by Panic! At The Disco: Three out of four entries in OSSAS take their name from "Kaleidoscope Eyes," a bonus track from the same album as this one that's not on streaming services (although you can find it on YouTube). In the absence of the title track, I picked "Mona Lisa" for its ethereal opener and ominous guitar work. I also adore the line "A lonely speaker in a conversation/Her words are swimming through his ears again" for the prologue of IICT(OSC).

"Small Cuts" by The Brobecks: This is where "It Doesn't Take Much (To Cover Up Small Cuts)" takes its name from. I think the themes of covering up pain while wanting someone to acknowledge it works very well for that particular fic, but also for the series as a whole. My favorite OSSAS-ish line in this one is "She will leave you deaf and bewildered/Oh, how she floats like a butterfly, stings like a killer."

"Visitation Of The Ghost" by The Brobecks: From the same album as "Small Cuts," this is a delightfully spooky track (and if you want extra drama, go look up the "fancy studio version"). The second verse is especially relevant for reasons I'll try to articulate in the finale of this year's installment, if all goes well, so pay attention to that one ;)

"GLOOMTOWN BRATS" by I DONT KNOW HOW BUT THEY FOUND ME: This track brings us three for three on Dallon Weekes songs, and there's more where that came from! A brand-new release, this song is a panicky, funky track that acts as a nod towards Nya's canon distrust towards overblown luxury and Nadakhan's veneer of gentlemanly behavior.

"Tell That Mick He Just Made My List of Things To Do Today" by Fall Out Boy: It's loud, it's fast, it's snarky, it's bitter - this is a song to run away to. Take a look at that chorus, the chunk with the bridges and the piss, and tell me otherwise. This might be a personal thing, but the swell of the volume between the verses and the choruses makes me think of swooping ocean waves.

"Playing God" by Paramore: At its core, OSSAS is a power struggle. This song exemplifies that with its own hefty dose of Nya-aligned snark and poignant venting. I especially like the pairing of the lines "Next time you point a finger, I might have to bend it back or break it off/Next time you point a finger, I'll point you to the mirror" as a character analysis of both Nya and Nadakhan (as a bonus, this line will become very relevant in the IICT(OSC) finale - and not for the reasons you think).

"Nearly Witches (Ever Since We Met...) by Panic! At The Disco: Another one from the album that kicked all this off, this is yet another spooky, dreamlike track, with an undercurrent of lost love and regret that serves Nadakhan especially well. (For him, I think it's fun to take the shouted "And I regret never letting you go!" out of the song's context for the IICT(OSC) opening sequence.)

"mirrorball" by Taylor Swift: Something a little softer and solidly out of the 2000s alt rock scene, this song works nicely for the introspective sections of the series, especially when it comes to how Nya processes her situation. For that, I really like the line "I'll show you every version of yourself tonight/I'll get you out on the floor" and the general quietness of the track.

"Look Who's Inside Again" by Bo Burnham: This one is pretty specific to IICT(OSC) and actually almost gave the fic its title! It ultimately didn't, but I think it's still a good fit. If I listed every line that fit the story, I'd be writing out the whole song, so do us both a favor and go play it once or twice.

"Hold Me Like A Grudge" by Fall Out Boy: Yet another snarky one that I particularly like for both Nya and as a tongue-in-cheek reference to Nadakhan's constant physical contact despite the fact that he's growing to resent her and his own failings (literally holding her like a grudge). Nya is nothing if not a "full-time problem". (Also: the bass line on this is incredible.)

"Carry On" by Coeur de Pirate: This song actually inspired the post-Seabound Nya fics I wrote a while back, so it's a Nya song to me now. In the context of the newest series installment, I love the line "The light of the sundowns/On my fate" as a little bit of foreshadowing.

"YES MOM" by Tessa Violet: This one is unadulterated independence, power posing, and self-confidence - that is, Nya every time she kicks off some new menace behavior. "Push me down and I bounce right back/Trampoline and it's in my past/Rising like a phoenix, making fire from the ash" is a FANTASTIC sequence for her, in both the context of her little successes in this series and her origin as Samurai X.

"The Carpal Tunnel Of Love" by Fall Out Boy: Surrealist Wentz lyricism at its best, I chose this one for the underlying themes of relationships that are apparently destined to never work (like the one Nya's trying to avoid) and the sheer energy. I especially like the Wentz screaming section in the middle, and the lyrics for that part are pretty relevant - although unintelligible, so you might want to just look them up and read them on your own.

"Say Amen (Saturday Night)" by Panic! At The Disco: The music video for this one inspired the combat sequence in IICT(OSC). Aside from that influence, I think the lyrics that swing from wild confidence to existential despair are a great fit for the tone of this series.

"bury a friend" by Billie Eilish: I love that this one opens with a series of questions that range from simply wondering what's wrong with someone to wondering about what happens after death. If that's not a fun fit for Nya's arc in this series (we'll get to the death thing eventually, don't worry), I don't know what is. Again, there's a nice sense of bitterness in here, as well as those ominous male backing vocals muttering "Careful" and echoing the lyrics here and there.

"Choke - Acoustic" by I DONT KNOW HOW BUT THEY FOUND ME: Both versions of this track are awesome, but I like the gentle, almost taunting creepiness of the acoustic style in this one. The entire song is about hating a place, which I think is appropriate given the fact that Nya's trapped with someone she hates for the first three fics on the timeline and with memories she hates for "Small Cuts." In IICT(OSC), she loosely considers burning the Temple down as a means of escape, but finds that she can't, which lines up beautifully with "If I could burn this town, I wouldn't hesitate/To smile while you suffocate and die." And, in true Weekes style, there's another little commentary against undeserved wealth that works nicely with Nya's disdain for her situation.

"Absinthe" by I DONT KNOW HOW BUT THEY FOUND ME: As of IICT(OSC), beverages are a major plot device, which plays nicely with 'Whatever they give you, stop drinking it down!" and the title of the track. If "Choke" is Nya's TLDR opinion of the situation, "Absinthe" is Nadakhan's - but we'll get to that in the finale.

"Modern Day Cain" by I DONT KNOW HOW BUT THEY FOUND ME: Last IDKHOW track for a while, I promise! And I hate that I keep saying the finale is going to make a lot of these make sense, but if it's true for one song, it's true for this one, which did inspire some of what I'm working on for the final confrontation.

"The Calendar" by Panic! At The Disco: This one is only here for the lines "There is simply nothing worse than knowing how it ends" and "Anticipation's on the other line, and obsession called while you were out" as very thematically-appropriate lines. Also, a straight bop.

"Patches of Sky" and "Path of the Eclipse" by Coeur de Pirate from Child of Light: A little instrumental break, these are two of the pieces I keep on my default writing playlist. Ominous and optimistic in equal measure, I think these two fit OSSAS well.

"Disloyal Order of Water Buffaloes" by Fall Out Boy: This one is an absolute goldmine of lines that could work for either of the series leads. For Nya, I really like the repeated "Boycott love! Detox just to retox!/And I'd promise you anything for another shot at life/Imperfect boys with their perfect ploys/Nobody wants to hear you sing about tragedy!" For Nadakhan, I like (well, not LIKE like, but I definitely think it works) the slightly stalkerish and somewhat paranoid "Little girl, you got me staring odd/Or was that just a telescopic camera nod?"

"Time To Dance" by Panic! At The Disco: This one is perfect in ways I can't articulate succinctly, although I do want to say I love the detached and kind of panicky sarcasm of the opener as a summary of the overall series mood: "Well, she's not bleeding on the ballroom floor just for the attention/'Cause that's just ridiculously odd/Well, she sure is gonna get it!" There's also some desperation in there that works very well for every failed escape attempt or revenge plot.

"Leave Me Alone - Piano Version" by I DONT KNOW HOW BUT THEY FOUND ME: Surprise, more IDKHOW! The lyrics on this one are pretty straightforward - read it as an insulting monologue being hurled at Nadakhan if you'd like. I chose this one for the lonely, vaguely-frightened vocals over the stripped-down piano backing.

"Boy Division" by My Chemical Romance: I like this one for its high energy and fight scene vibes, but most importantly, look at those lyrics - don't they read as someone lamenting a situation they put themselves into? I think that works well for what I've done and plan to do to Nadakhan in this year's installment and any future ones.

"To The End" and "It's Not a Fashion Statement, It's a Fucking Deathwish" by My Chemical Romance: Songs from Three Cheers for Sweet Revenge automatically get Skybound brownie points for all the gore and the wedding theme. "To The End" reads as a mockery of Nadakhan's marriage plot; "Deathwish" is a fun examination of resilience and, well, revenge - I adore the line "I'm taking back the life you stole/This hole you put me in wasn't deep enough, and I'm climbing out right now/You're running out of places to hide from me!" as a general summary of what Nya's doing the whole time.

"F.T.W.W.W." by My Chemical Romance: Again, excellent action sequence energy here; this is what flipping the bird would sound like if it made noise. In the context of Skybound and this series, I really appreciate the line "The heart you got, it ain't the one you need."

"Karma" by Taylor Swift: Listen, this entire series is an excuse to flip the script on Nadakhan and let Nya take a crack at the whole "read your enemies and then use their flaws to beat them to an emotional pulp" tactic, because frankly that's a cool narrative device. Here's where "Karma" works best: remember the line in "Wishmasters" where Nya, with little other comment, tells Nadakhan that he'll be sorry? That's this song. There's a sort of "I know you're about to get your ass beat" energy, a sort of wink wink from the singer that subtly pokes the subject with the knowledge that only one person here is in the right.

[fangirleaconmigo]

I would love to hear your bitter rant abt TWN Eskel

Ok Nonny, duck and cover. Here it comes.

I tend to delay making posts like this because when I watch something (in this case, the botched Episode 2 of Season 2) and get pissed off, I like to calm down and think before I speak.

But then time passes, and it’s like….it’s too late. It’d be weird now. (this is actually the story of my entire life and communication style) But if you’re interested in my Eskel rant, I am happy to oblige.

Before I do, please know I am not just reflexively negative. I reviewed S2 Ep 1 and gave it an A. I posted a long ass blog post saying how much I loved it. The vast, vast majority of the space I take up on social media is focused on positivity and restraint. But I’m a human being too, and like anyone else on this planet, I cannot possibly be expected to love literally everything.

So DO NOT CLICK OR READ IF TWN CRITIQUE IS GOING TO BUM YOU OUT OR RUIN YOUR ENJOYMENT OF IT. Protect your peace. Curate your fandom experience. I want you to be happy and comfortable here first and foremost, I do not need anyone to read this who doesn't want to.

So, for me (book fan, fan of witchers and Eskel), Season 2 Ep 2 failed at everything it attempted regarding the parts set at Kaer Morhen. It failed at showing basic respect for the fans. It failed at telling the original story. It also failed at telling its own story. It also introduced brand spanking new misogyny to the story and to the wolves that was so goddamn disappointing to watch.

It failed at having basic respect for the fans. You can change almost everything about a story. But I firmly believe that the major things like deaths should stay the same. Killing off a character that does not die in the books is a dick move. You can only get away with it if your new story is so powerful and brilliant that it makes people appreciate it for what it is. But it didn’t do that either.

It failed at telling the original story: In book canon (on which the show is ostensibly based) Eskel is the gentlest, most gentlemanly witcher we ever meet! He is kind. He is mannerly. He is loyal. He is protective. I did a whole character breakdown here.

TWN made him a predatory, misogynistic creep. He is aggressive and shitty and creepy to Ciri. He even implies to Geralt that if he would have found Ciri, he wouldn’t have adopted her. He would have fucked her. Seriously I could barely watch, it was painful. I was ill.

But he was infected by the leshy! And we just wanted his death to have impact.

No! That story failed too! They threw the original story in the trash, then replaced it with a weak story that didn't work on it's own merits.

It failed because it did not establish Eskel as a character first. It did not establish his friendship with Geralt first. And no one in the story seemed to be surprised by his behavior. So there was NOTHING in that story that made me FEEL or SEE that it was unusual behavior for Eskel.

If a character is acting the literal opposite of their personality, people would have reacted! When he walked in acting like a giant weirdo Geralt would have hog tied him and performed an exorcism lol. He never once said what the fuck is going on with you. Neither did anyone else.

You can tell me that he was infected by the leshy and that this was unusual behavior for him, but if you show me the opposite thing, (no one taking much note of it) it is muddled, weak storytelling. The ‘after’ scene in the hall could not retroactively change the order in which people experienced his arc. Also, it couldn’t fix this glaring error.

So you’ve disappointed and screwed over people who love Eskel. And you’ve had zero effect on people who didn’t know Eskel. No one who was watching him for the first time gave a shit that he died, because from scene one he was a complete piece of shit. So his death didn’t even have an impact.

Its only job in the narrative was to be vague danger hits unexpectedly close to home making Geralt pivot from ‘hide Ciri away’ to ‘teach Ciri to fend for herself’. There were a million other ways they could have done that. It wasn’t powerful. It wasn’t necessary.

So why does that matter? I’ve seen people go “But he’s a minor character who cares?” I mean, if you don’t love that character then no, you don’t care. And you don’t have to! People connect to different characters. It is allowed. I am fully aware that this is largely a book reader complaint, and it doesn’t need to impact your enjoyment of the show. It shouldn’t! It is also an Eskel fan complaint (which includes lots of gamers), and not everyone is that either. You have my blessing and my envy to not care.

But I would like to differentiate between minor and insignificant. In the books, Geralt and Ciri are the main characters. (Geralt starts out as the main character and it kind of segues into focusing more and more on Ciri.)

And Kaer Morhen is essential to grounding, to defining, to understanding, and to humanizing both Geralt and Ciri. Kaer Morhen may only appear “live” in one book, but this place explains entirely how Geralt became Geralt. And it is (along with Yen) what gives Ciri the strength and resources to survive and vanquish her foes. She dreams about Kaer Morhen. She has visions of it. She recalls their lessons at the most pivotal moments throughout the entirety of her journey. Kaer Morhen may not be ‘on the page’ much, but it is at the heart of literally everything.

And Eskel is the witcher who (other than Vesemir) has known Geralt the longest. They are the same age. They were childhood best friends who played together. He is literally the only living person who was a child alongside Geralt. He knows him and anchors him in a way no one else could. He is singular and unique in that regard. There is something powerful about a story with beings who have been almost wiped out in genocides and are the last of their kinds. It defines Geralt in so many ways. And Eskel is an inextricable part of that.

And Eskel’s protectiveness of Ciri and his kindness to her, makes a huge difference in her life. Also, ETA: Eskel is the first witcher Ciri sees who isn’t Geralt and she is terrified because of how he looks. She is scared when she arrives at Kaer Morhen. But then she learns they are not scary. They are safe and they take care of her. So she learns not to be afraid or judge based on outward appearances. And that is because of Eskel.

So you can say that Eskel is a minor character, but you cannot say that he is insignificant to the story, because he is massively significant to the main characters.

And not only did this episode fuck up him, it fucked up that entire dynamic.

Kaer Morhen is a place of safety and family for Ciri and she calls upon it for strength for the rest of her life. And instead of Geralt walking in and saying “She is our destiny” and them pitching together to train and love and raise her, you have them ignoring her, being like ‘who the fuck is this’ and also sexually harrassing her? Like sobs What was the reason??? Then Geralt kills Eskel??? Kills him??? And Lambert is like…this is all Ciri’s fault?? What the fuck? We didn’t even know Ciri was involved yet. It was so confusing. I was like what the fuck are you saying, Lambert??? It was like a nightmare! Who are these people?? Lmaosob.

And Kaer Morhen itself, this mystical, melancholy place that is speaks of brothers lost that must be hidden at all costs, they bring like an entire group of sex workers there? Geralt can say the place is hidden. But if you show me that everyone and their mother parties there, I don’t feel it.

And the explanation of ‘they all somehow got black out drunk literally simultaneously and they get all the sex workers black out drunk and that is why not a single one of them objected to it, and then Vesemir was totally cool with it because that is both possible, and somehow makes it better?’

But even worse was the misogyny that was introduced. I’m gonna switch to feminist killjoy mode, and I know some of these things I absolutely hated, quite a few of you loved. And that is fine. I respect you and I love you and I would never tell people how to feel about it. But here is what I absolutely loathed.

As a feminist, one of the most important ways to tell if someone’s feminism is real is how they treat sex workers. Feminism is for EVERY WOMAN. ALL. NO FUCKING EXCEPTIONS. The minute someone is degrading of sex workers, I see their true colors. Their true colors are respectability politics, girlbossery, and dignity for some. It cuts through a lot of bullshit.

A lot of people see TWN as feminist. And there are FOR SURE some strong feminist themes that I appreciate. But in this episode it was just a big old rotten turd in that respect. (that’s the technical term).

They introduced sex workers so that they could show a naked dead female body. How regressive is that? What the fuck? They also introduced sex workers to act as a ‘scare tactic’ and ‘cautionary tale’ for Ciri. What the fuckkkkkkkkk man help me out here I’m crying.

And I will say that I adore 90% of what they did with Geralt and Ciri this season. I could write a positive post about that if anyone wanted to wash the taste of my disappointment out of their mouths. But again, I am focusing on this ep, and it was just a turd all the way around.

When Geralt stepped THREATENINGLY into Danica’s face because she implied Ciri could become a sex worker, what the fuckkkkk. I KNOW people think that is cute. I respect your point of view. I appreciate you. But I have to disagree. I hated it with my whole heart.

You add that to Vesemir’s little remark about Ciri dancing on tables that was supposed to upset Geralt, and we have more of the same.

Geralt HAS NEVER AND WOULD NEVER be the “I’m bringing a gun to my daughter’s first date” kind of dad. He’s never been the “I'm safeguarding my daughter’s vagina so she keeps her virtue” kind of dad.

Y’all. I’m sorry. I am so sorry. I hate it. It creeps me the fuckout. The ENTIRE POINT of Geralt’s relationship with Ciri is that he protects her AUTONOMY. Not her VIRTUE. Do we not see how those two things are literal opposites? Geralt cares about protecting Ciri. From having to kill people. From being traumatized. From being killed or forced to have babies against her will. Not from having fun (dancing on tables??!!). And his worst nightmare is not a sex worker.

HE GOES TO THEM!! He isn’t disgusted by them. To have him again, STEP THREATENINGLY towards Danica to show ‘oh he’s a real dad’ I’m sorry I despise it. I hate that model of fatherhood. The one that is focused on guarding virtue. And Geralt of Rivia baby I’m so sorry that ugly bitch (episode 2) did that to you.

I can have a sense of humor about myself ok I know I’m not in the majority. I know that’s the model of fatherhood that people like. They think it’s cute. But we are all individuals and have our own reactions to things, and that is mine.

I even hated how they had him not remember Danica. Every time she was on screen it was ‘haha see how crappy all these witchers treat them?’ And they also got them all black out drunk??

Holy shit you guys. This is what the creators of this show think the ‘rugged, rough around the edges’ masculinity of witchers is all about. Gahhhhhhhhhh.

And the one bright spot, Geralt and Vesemir, they ended up taking away from me when Vesemir betrays Geralt and TRIES TO DOSE CIRI????

So look. Again. There are so many things I do love about the show. I could wax complimentary about the parts I love if you guys want me to. I love SO MUCH about what they've done with Yen. The sorceresses. I love that they've given them genuine friendships. I could also talk about that. I am obsessed with Myanna Buring as Tissaia. We know how I feel about Joey's Jaskier. I mean it's not the cast's fault! I am fully, fully in love with Yasen Atour as Coën, he was absolutely perfect. I wouldn't be so into the fandom if there weren't many things that I love.

But the fact is, TWN just does not ‘get’ witchers. They do not understand their oppressions (class, mostly) or how power structures exploit them. They made this plainly obvious in the lore they created for the sacking of Kaer Morhen and the ‘Vesemir doses Ciri’ storyline. (that is a whole other post) They do not understand this model of masculinity. They made this plainly obvious with this episode.

Which, these are big things to not ‘get’ for a show that is called The Witcher.

But this is probably just fine for most people! If they have no strong attachments to the themes and spirit of the books, I'm sure it is fine. I understand that this is a niche nerd rant and that I feel passionately about something most people do not! That’s ok. That’s the nerd life baby.

This has been my rant.

[dollsorwhatever]

Mattel Disney Princess

I’ve gotten a couple of the Mattel DP dolls and thought I’d share my findings lol Re: hair type; the general rule seems to be that if a doll has relatively straight and loose hair or a very simple style, she will have poly- if the doll has bangs, short hair or any kind of specific hair style or a style that requires gelled curls or (in Moana’s case) textured curls, she will have saran. From what I’ve been told by designers at Mattel, they really do try to work saran into as many dolls as possible and usually reserve poly for dolls with longer/straighter hair (that won’t be damaged as easily through play) or colors that can’t be found in saran; this isn’t a steadfast rule and it really depends on the line and particular doll, but that’s what I’ve been told and what I’ve generally noticed since Mattel started using poly. Based on photographs and videos, my tentative guesses for the budget dolls are that budget Ariel, Pocahontas, Rapunzel, Jasmine, Raya and Elsa- are all poly. The other budget dolls are saran as far as I know.  Deluxe dolls are more likely to have saran but it’s not guaranteed, for example the Deluxe Elsa dolls have poly (I think) but the Hairplay Rapunzel doll has floor length saran hair, and the singing Moana is also saran!  

Of the budget dolls I have Pocahontas (probably my favorite), she has polypropylene hair but it is so straight and simply packaged that it comes with absolutely no frizz and all it took was a quick boil and flat iron to make it look not just nice, but actually gorgeous and sleek and shiny!

(big shirts to cover the molded on tops lol) 

I might even prefer it over g3 Cleo’s poly honestly, it’s that nice lol  I absolutely adore the sculpts for this line so far and Pocahontas is definitely one of my favorites! It only took Mattel, like...30 years to make a new Pocahontas sculpt and it was well worth the wait imo because this is probably her best sculpt of any brand!  My only real issue with Pocahontas is that she has really skinny short legs, which will undoubtedly be present on any version of her with non-sculpted clothing so I’ll have to find a Tall Fashionistas leg donor in her skintone lol I also have the Singing Moana doll! Her (saran) curls were very damaged from the packaging so I just went ahead and straightened them, she was my first Mattel DP doll from this launch and I LOVE her face!! I wasn’t able to get the Deluxe Ariel dolls when they first launched so I’m glad Moana could be my first instead lol

I also have the Hairplay Rapunzel!

I hate her crown honestly, it’s just so large and weirdly proportioned lol Sculpted top, fabric skirt. I’ll be controversial for a second and say that I don’t think there’s anything wrong with sculpted tops and I don’t know how anyone was expecting Mattel to do full fabric dresses for the 10$ budget dolls considering it has been the industry standard for almost a decade at this point, but I don’t know why the hell this doll has one- not just because she’s 23$, but also because the hair gets stuck in her hinged shoulder joints lol.  If that weren’t an issue I would have considered leaving her like this because I actually think the sculpted top is really nice, but I went ahead and ordered the Rapunzel and Maximus doll set to steal her body, because that one does have a fabric dress for some reason lol 

(the original Maximus set head is poly btw)  It really is surprising what a fabric dress and saran hair does to improve an entire doll, even a printed (albeit well made) dress like this one lol

I’ve rarely liked the Rapunzel dolls made by any company, but I really love this one’s sculpt and screening- she reminds me of the 2015 Signature Rapunzel doll from Mattel but with a much softer expression!  These all have UV facial screenings, by the way; pixelated screenings have honestly never bothered me in certain contexts and I like the level of detail they can get with UV, (and that they have a lower frequency of wonk than traditional slide-decals and spray screening) but I figured I would note for anyone who absolutely hates UV screening lol Also, the non-budget Rapunzel dolls come with a frying pan that doubles as a hairbrush, which is the funniest and coolest design for a Rapunzel accessory I’ve ever seen lol 

I remember wanting an accessory for her like this when I was younger and it’s just so funny that they actually did it lol  And since Rapunzel is my only 2023 Mattel DP doll that I have with fabric clothing right now, here’s a quick body comparison!

L-R: Short flat foot Hasbro DP body, 2000′s Mattel short DP body, 2023 Mattel short flat foot body and a Petite Barbie body!  The short Disney princess body from Mattel is actually one of my favorite body sculpts from Mattel, but I do really love this new one! I like the larger feet, the slightly more graceful hands and the fact that the 2023 waist is wider than the bust which is my only gripe with the older version lol  The new Mattel dolls also have shorter necks than before (similar to the G3 MH dolls) so any rebodying with MtM or Fashionista bodies will give them a much longer neck lol  Anyway, while this line is definitely not perfect and I have my own personal critiques, I am actually pleased with a lot of the offerings from Mattel so far and I appreciate them for what they are; the head sculpts are all very nicely done (some of them are the best versions for their respective characters across the board even), the screenings are nice, the accessory sculpts are clever and interesting and the relative frequency of saran hair is a gift from the heavens after all these years of Hasbro princesses with poly hair across the board lol I was never expecting this line to be what other people wanted it to be; it’s pretty clear that Disney wants the Disney Princess line to be marketed for a much younger demographic than a Monster High doll and I can only assume the sculpted tops are working for them if they’ve been so prevalent after all these years, and if they keep the sculpted clothing within the 10-15$ range I don’t think it’s that big of a deal- and I do think there is enough demand for a more ‘deluxe’ set of dolls from Mattel with fabric clothing and full saran hair at a 20-25$ price point, so I hope they make an effort to do more dolls with fabric clothing. And  I would LOVE to be able to get my hands on a Pocahontas and Moana with fabric clothing instead of having to cover their sculpted tops with big baggy sweaters and jumpsuits lol  (oh, and if you want to call any of my dolls ugly, keep it in your own post- I don’t want to hear it! xx) 

[myceliumtoaster]

Pixel art slaps!

Very off-brand from my usual content but guys?? I’m obsessed with pixel art. I just started a few days ago and I’m in love with all the little guys I can make. And I’m visiting the local aquarium tomorrow (for my birthday!!) so I’m gonna take a bunch of pictures and make more guys!!

For context I’ve been super into traditional art for most of my life but I never quite found a method/style of digital art I enjoyed, until now! My problem with- I guess you’d call it, traditional digital art? is that that large of a canvas throws me off- I can’t seem to find a good balance of detail vs bigger picture on a large canvas no matter how I work at it. So some parts end up overworked and others end up completely underworked because I don’t know when to call it quits. But I did still learn a lot about colors and lighting through trial and error over the past couple of years!

Funnily enough it was tumblr that made me think about doing things differently. I was researching the size requirements for pfp on here and found out it’s real small- 128 x 128 pixels. I opened up a canvas of that size and got to work, at first treating it like any other art project, but I soon realized I could have a lot more fun if I treated it like pixel art!

Having a smaller canvas has been really helping me learn more about colors and how they interact with each other, and it’s making me think different in general because brush type doesn’t really matter at this size. I’m used to relying on the texture each brush adds to the canvas to create depth, but now I have to use primarily color and opacity control for that! It’s a really interesting shift.

I did have to troubleshoot a bit because procreate (the drawing app I use) makes images blurry when they’re saved, and I found out in order to fix it you need to scale the image back up to a bigger pixel size. Luckily there’s apps out there for that, and I found a pretty good one that’s literally just called Pixel Art Scaler. Free and no ads, in case anyone else needs something like that!

Anyhow here’s one of the guys I drew, I’m really happy with how he came out! I’ve always had a soft spot for whale sharks, they’re such cuties. I love all sharks but these guys in particular make my heart go brrrrrrr

Reblog to spread a cutie :)

Thanks for reading! - ⭐️

[agirlunfilteredsblog]

BUILDING A CLOSET THAT WORKS FOR YOU

Hi girls! So something I’ve found super important in finding who you are as an individual is finding your fashion/style. It’s so easy to get washed up in trends we see that we buy things that we wont even wear come 6 months layers. Here are some things I’ve done in order to build a closet that is timeless!

1. INVESTING IN BASICS

I completely understand the urge to buy clothing we see go viral on social media, but more often times than not, we simply like the appeal it has. That doesn’t necessarily mean it correlates with OUR style. Basics work well on everyone, and can be used as a blank canvas for outfits.

White and black tees/tank tops, straight leg jeans, one-colored hoodies, a simply black dress, black slacks and a pair of leggings are all elements I personally think everyone should own.

2. Accessories are your BEST FRIENDS

- Let’s talk jewelry first. In my opinion, investing in quality jewelry is always a better option than simply buying jewelry from cheap stores, such as Shein. They’ll rust easily and won’t last long. Now that doesn’t mean you need to go all out in luxury, there are many stores that have quality jewelry, while remaining in a suitable price range (Mejuri, for example). However, I heavily recommend APM Monaco jewelry if you want to splurge a little. The jewelry there is amazing! I’m not personally a “silver” or “gold” girlie, I like both, and sometimes will even stack them together. This brings me to my second point!! No shame to my minimalistic girls, but i LOVE when my wrists are stacked with bracelets, I feel like it adds SO MUCH to an outfit. That with some chunky hoops and a simple necklace, will elevate your look tenfold.

- Just like jewelry, finding a quality bag goes a long way!! Every girl should have at least one purse that they can use on an every day basis. And there is no excuse, a quality purse can be found at the thrift store. I have so many beautiful bags that have all been thrifted!! However, if you’re looking to purchase one, here are my recommendations (based on overall quality and look): Longchamp, Goyard, Polène, Coach. In my opinion, these are the brands where you can truly find bags that are well-made and can match with most outfits!

3. UNDERSTANDING THAT SHOES ELEVATE ANY OUTFIT

I don’t know if it’s just me, but sometimes I’ll base my whole outfit around my shoes. Shoes are SO powerful and the difference between wearing a sneaker and a heel is massive. I can’t really comment on where to buy quality heels (since I only own a handful, so please let me know in the comments if you know lol), but I’ll put some sneakers down below that I adore!

Sambas, Gazelles, New Balance 550s, Isabel Marant shoes, Golden Gooses, Alexander Mcqueen

4. BUYING A COUPLE OF UNIQUE PIECES

I think that style reflects who we are and investing in a couple unique pieces is definitely the way to go. I personally choose to invest my money in unique sweaters or cardigans (since I live in a relatively cold country). I also tend to find more unique pieces at small businesses, rather than large companies. Pinterest is also the greatest help in finding your own sense of fashion.

Let me know if you would like more links, examples of pieces I would wear!!

so much love,

a girl unfiltered 💋

[sandorara]

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Let’s spread the self-love❤

Oh, this is so nice! And incredibly difficult, which has made me feel nice. Can you believe I have so many works I'm still pleased with that it was difficult to choose? What a pleasant feeling.

Anyway, in chronological order of posting, starting from the most recent. I've decided not to choose unfinished ones or co-authored pieces, so we're going decently far back right from the start.

1. See you in Eorzea - Yizhan & FF14, 69k, E I (M 28) picked up someone (M 2x) in a video game and I think they might be famous. Please advise.

Famous/non-famous MMORPG AU, meet cute in Sastasha. My longest work ever when I wrote it, and it was completed before posting anything. Still really happy with it, and, Yoshi-p should pay me royalties for how many converts it's created. I'm confident you do not need to know yizhan to enjoy it, if you would like to give it a try 💕

2. For the future you (the one without me) - Yizhan, 6.4k, T “Why Singapore?,” she’d asked him once, and he’d not known how to answer. An exploration of what may lie outside the few minutes the Vogue Film offered.

Inspired by a Vogue shortfilm Wang Yibo starred in, link to it can be found in the a/n of the fic. 9 minutes, very aesthetically worth it. I'm really happy with the atmosphere of this work, and I feel like it's very representative of my shorter, fleetier, ever bittersweet style. Am proud still. 🥺

3. Written, never said - cql - lwj & mianmian, wangxian, 6.6k, G ”I have a letter to deliver to young lady Luo Qingyang. It has arrived from Gusu today, with the quickest delivery.”

Thirteen years of correspondence, understanding and friendship.

My Mianmian and LWJ friendship agenda. Epistolary fic covering the years of WWX's death through Mianmian's eyes on the letters she receives and writes. I'm still happy with how this one conveys what I wanted to say. I'm pleased with it stylistically. And they deserved that friendship, IT WAS THERE, OK.

4. Sensations - ffxiv - wolexarch, 4.7k E ”Make it hurt, please,” he’d finally whispered, as each day, more of his body was being eaten away by the crystal, leaving him missing touch in places he did not know he’d wanted it.

A stand-alone AU within my wolfic series in which G'raha's crystallisation speeds up after the events of 5.0 and the completion of his mission. and with it comes loss of sensation. This one came to be when my dear friend @draiochteve prompted me to write "soft knifeplay". I love the bittersweet desperation and love I managed to convey in this one, and, I just want you to take note of the publication date: This was posted exactly a year before the release of patch 5.3. 😌

5. Nothing more than a willing substitute - ffxiv, asahi/zenos, 4.3k, E He would do anything to please his beloved Prince.

Oldest one here and I will admit I'm impressed that I still think it's worthy of this list, five years later. One of my first 14 fics, and definitely the most wretched thing I had ever written at the time. Mayhap one may call it my descent into the filth-pit. Asahi just made me feral, and it worked out. My dear gf @g0g0mi just desrcibed this one as "iconic", so. Unrecruited obsession love, swordplay, bondage, choking... there are things. IDK. My brand started here, OK. And, I think it still holds up. 😎

Thank you for letting me do this, it was quite the mood-boost! Will pass it on. 😊

[unhinged-diaries]

I just started a new job and got promoted quickly which is great!

I basically work alone so I’m kind of my own boss. I get to allocate my time as I see fit and don’t have someone breathing down my neck. Constantly turning my head to see who’s watching.

It’s more work but pays enough and I have a benefit that helps my business which is nice.

The job is right across from a popular shopping center in my city. I don’t shop at the mall so the only store I’m interested in is whole foods. My family loves whole foods growing up bc that’s where my stepdad worked so he would always bring home the goods. But since he died no one has felt it necessary to go out of their way to get it since it’s so far from my house. But the fact that it’s right down the street from me now is so exciting.

I plan on restarting my gym membership, shopping at Whole Foods for food, and utilizing the giant fridge I have at my job that’s practically all mine. Lord knows if I left the food at my home fridge it’d be gone within the hour bc my brother’s a fuckin munch.

I just have to get over the embarrassment of pulling into the Whole Foods parking lot with a banged up car. What are they gonna do though? Arrest me? (This is me hyping myself up)

Changing up the content style of my business and plan on launching a new product soon. I believe this new strategy will work well for me and I might be able to use one of the videos to run ads on Facebook.

My score mentor thought it’d be a good idea to

1. Introduce affiliate marketing which I didn’t think I was big enough for and

2. Collaborate with other small businesses.

I like the second suggestion much better right now. I could utilize jewelry, makeup, and wig brands in my content to really sell the lifestyle and they can repost it on their page. Kind of like a shout out for shout out.

As far as affiliate marketing goes, I need to find the right platform to use. Everytime I try to research affiliate marketing it always shows the influencer side of it and not the business side. I’ll do more digging.

I think I found a manufacturer that can make a bunch of different items for me. Denim jeans, plus dresses, plus knit. I’ve been looking for a one stop shop type for a while and I think I’ve got them. I’ll have to order a couple samples but my lord are they expensive. Gotta keep reminding myself that it’s an investment.

Thank all for now. Ciao