#(i hate using buzzwords like that but seriously)

[bad-wolf-circe]

finally watched the barbie movie. guys it's literally just an advertisement. yall hyped up an advertisement. y'all hyped up a 2-hour russian nesting doll of advertisements with surface level feminism that doesn't actually accomplish anything. this is literally just a giant, "edgy-but-self-aware" advertisement. it says alllll the right things, all of the politically correct things, but at the end of the day IT! IS! STILL! AN! AD!!! mattel does NOT care about ur asses and the literal BILLION dollars they made off of this movie only proves that.

[kindnessoverperfection]

Please, if you can, take a moment to read and share this because I feel like I'm screaming underwater.

NPD (Narcissistic Personality Disorder) stigma is rampant right now, and seems to be getting progressively worse. Everyone is using it as a buzzword in the worst ways possible, spreading misinformation and hatred against a real disorder.

I could go on a long time about how this happened, why it's factually incorrect (and what the disorder actually IS), why it's harmful, and the changes I'd like to see. But to keep this concise, I'll simply link to a few posts under the cut for further reading.

The point of this post is a plea. Please help stop the spread of stigma. Even in mental health communities, even around others with personality disorders, in neurodivergent "safe" spaces, other communities I thought people would be supportive in (e.g. trans support groups, progressive spaces in general), it keeps coming up. So I'm willing to bet that a lot of people on this site need to see this.

Because it's so hard to exist in this world.

My disorder already makes me feel as if I'm worthless and unlovable, like there's something inherently wrong and damaged about me. And it's so much harder to fight that and heal when my daily life consists of:

Laughing and spending time with my friends, doing my utmost best to connect and stay present and focused on them, trying to let my guards down and be real and believe I'm lovable- when suddenly they throw out the word "narcissist" to describe horrible people or someone they hate, or the conversation turns to how evil "people with narcissistic personality disorder" are. (Seriously, you don't know which of your friends might have NPD and feels like shit when you say those things & now knows that you'd hate them if you knew.)

Trying to look up "mental health positivity for people with npd", "mental health positivity cluster bs", only to find a) none of that, and b) more of the same old vile shit that makes me feel terrible about myself.

Having a hard time (which is constant at this point) and trying to look up resources for myself, only to again, find the same stigma. And no resources.

Not having any clue how to help myself, because even the mental health field is spitting so much vitriol at people with DISORDERS (who they're supposed to be helping!) that there's no solid research or therapy programs for people like me.

Losing close friends when they find out, despite us having had a good relationship before, and them KNOWING me and knowing that I'm not like the trending image of pwNPD. Because now they only see me through the lens of stigma and misinformation.

Hearing the same stigma come up literally wherever I go. Clubs. Meetings. Any online space. At the bus stop. At the mall. At a restaurant. At work. Buzzword of the year that everyone loooves loudly throwing around with their friends or over the phone. Feels awesome for me, makes my day so much better/s

I could go on for a long time, but I'm scared no one will read/rb this if it gets too much longer.

So please. Stop using the word "narcissist" as a synonym for "abusive".

Stop bringing up people you hate who you believe to have NPD because of a stigmatizing article full of misinformation whenever someone with actual NPD opens their mouth. (Imagine if people did that with any other disorder! "Hey, I'm autistic." "Oh... my old roommate screamed at me whenever I made noise around him, and didn't understand my needs, which seems like sensory overload and difficulty with social cues. He was definitely autistic. But as long as you're self-aware and always restraining your innate desire to be an abusive asshole, you're okay I guess, maybe." ...See how offensive and ignorant that is?)

Stop preventing healthcare for people with a disorder just because it's trendy to use us as a scapegoat.

If you got this far, thank you for reading, and please share this if you can. Further reading is under the cut.

NPD Criteria, re-written by someone who actually has NPD

Stigma in the DSM

Common perception of the DSM criteria vs how someone may actually experience them (Keep in mind that this is the way I personally experience these symptoms, and that presentation can vary a lot between individuals)

"Idk, the stigma is right though, because I've known a lot of people with NPD who are jerks, so I'm going to continue to support the blockage of treatment for this condition."

(All of these were written by me, because I didn't want to link to other folks' posts without permission, but if you want to add your own links in reblogs or replies please feel free <3)

[girlreblogger]

the annoyance with blk y/n and the stories she’s in is hilarious. her characteristics might be the problem one day or her side characters the next. it legit feels like we may never get to a balanced solution on what to do with our own representation since the wrong ppl always talk about it and create it. we have mean and shallow ppl who take over the conversation, ppl who really self hate but try and cover it up with “i just don’t want her to be a stereotype” and then the ones who probably love and support tyler perry movies.

the bottom line is the ppl who do write those niggafying, toxic (it’s a buzzword but that’s what they are) or smutty fics (not talking abt the actual good ones with a blk reader though 🧎🏽‍♀️) can do wtv they want and owe you nothing. that’s why they get so frustrated. i don’t think all the times those should be crucified for what they write when other groups of ppl (or our own) write all kinds of other crazy shit.

and.. i know a lot of ppl who don’t want to say it but y’all keep bringing up the smut and niggafying as the main problem, but i think it’s some of the ppl writing it and their underlings. it’s just no one wants to say anything.

an excerpt from a draft of mine

“a lot of ppl on here be weirdos or mean asl. so when someone block you don’t be like “oh what i did” “they that mad cause of my (internet—fictional—digital on screen) presence”

like nobody got time to go to your acc and say “i don’t like you” who cares. oddly some miserable ppl do actually but still. the lack of awareness is ridiculous. that’s why ppl don’t f with y’all.”

i was talking abt all of tumblr and every other app but it applies here.

from what i see on here, some are just straight up weird, cliquey, and chiesty (if that’s how you spell it) and that’s why ppl be so mad abt those types of books 💀. we also have to acknowledge the amount of overwhelming & honestly damaging blk yn fics (not to be confused with ppls screwed ideas of stereotypical) there are. i understand why ppl write them for personal reasons but when it comes to our own reflections of ourselves as blk women it’s almost hurtful to read some of the things people put “her” through. i mean even her with a white man that use aave and has cornrows is hurtful.. 😔 (i’m trolling now 💀) naw but fr. i personally don’t like reading blk women just being written for smut or going through crazy situations or kinda like.. i don’t wanna say unfulfilling but like.. idk i can’t think of the word. (edit: ppl write blk yn to be in unfulfilling situations) but girl i can watch a tyler perry movie for all that.

again. ppl write these stories for there own personal reasons, relate to them and enjoy them for those reasons as well. that’s why depending! on what it is i don’t think blk writers should be bombarded with hate like that. also ion think smut should be banned like y’all go to far can we just slow down on it … there are some nice ones out there i promise 🧎🏽‍♀️

but in all seriousness there are many other reasons why i feel toxic and smutty fics are popular for blk yn but i don’t think anyone cares to hear that and the conversion will prolly go back to nigga eren somehow which is crazy cause y’all be arguing over a fictional white man.

oh! 😒 i almost forgot 😒 the ppl who are against “ghetto” y/n to try and advocate for more fluffy or like.. normal (healing) stories and from what i see the ppl who are the most up in arms about it in my personal opinion seem to dislike certain parts of blkness that i appreciate personally and so i just straight up disregard their opinions. y/n doesn’t have to “act” (😒) blk but i see ppl get mad about her protecting her hair….. with a bonnet….

sigh, anyway but yeah we need more soft and sweet fics or just like calming ones? but someone gon have to write it! i don’t like this app or my writing all too much so i gave up a while ago.

just like many other blk writers….

gaspp! we should also do like a fluff challenge or sumn where writers do like fluff … march? girl idk so maybe that will trend and all the ppl who spend time arguing and going back and forth with ppl who write stories they don’t like can like idk look for other writers who write soft, normal, fun stories and reblog them or make a list of them. or maybe like possibly write their own stories too????

everyone says the smut fics gets the most likes and they do. that’s why you keep seeing them. so maybe support or refreakingblog the fics that are comforting to you so others can be as well.

i actually made this page to repost softer fics because i was tired of blocking certain tags so i can avoid heavy smut and subtly abuse fics. also pls leave the ppl who niggafy anime characters alone they will not be stopped. i mean we still have ppl who have been calling chris evans jamal since 2020.. calling him that to this date. married and all.

sigh… 2 more days until blk history month ends. maybe next year we can find a balance between “dramatic” and smutty fics and soft and slice of life ones for blk y/n next year. remember this is tumblr too and the ppl writing aren’t even getting paid for this but it’s for the ppl yk.

ppl who are respectful and reblog tho.

muah

[astraltrickster]

Basically, my problem with how AI tech plays into the media labor conversation is this.

Consider the statement:

"Hollywood wants to use AI image and voice synthesis to eliminate credited writers and background actors and isn't likely to stop there."

The actual way we need to be reading this:

"Hollywood wants to use AI image and voice synthesis to eliminate credited writers and background actors and isn't likely to stop there."

The way some takes seem to read it, though, is more like this:

"Hollywood wants to use AI image and voice synthesis to eliminate credited writers and background actors and isn't likely to stop there."

And falling into that line of thinking is a REALLY good way to get tricked into thinking it's somehow a better compromise when they propose the exact same thing with different technology, or even just call it something that's less of a buzzword misnomer.

(I even have...some degree of suspicion that this is intentional, though I don't know how seriously I take it considering we're talking about the same people who thought saying "we're planning on killing people to get your shows back without paying livable wages" would get them more support than hate.)

Do not lose sight of what the problem is. This shit is ghoulish no matter HOW they try to do it.

[nyaagolor]

Bad Polls and the Art of Engagement Bait

So as anyone who follows this blog probably noticed, I posted a poll yesterday. Sorry ace attorney tumblr, it was bait. That was part of a little social experiment to test some theories I had about engagement bait and the tumblr "algorithm"-- and it was a resounding success!! I even made a replicate, that being a similar poll only hours later, which had basically the same result. Somehow. Now that the cat is officially out of the bag, I thought it would be fun to talk about it!

The entire point of this little social experiment was to combine some observations I had about what posts do well, the general attitude of tumblr users, and how to maximize engagement with minimal effort within fandom spaces. Thus, I'm combining all my thoughts into a little guide: how to make the lowest effort, highest engagement post possible:

Recognize that negative engagement on tumblr travels father than positive engagement Tumblr may not have an algorithm, but the system is still set up in a way where negative engagement rewards the poster more than positive engagement. A simple "like" is enough to show agreement or approval, but dissent or shock requires replies or reblogs (the latter of which are significantly more common). More reblogs = more people seeing the post, and thus posts that elicit a negative reaction tend to travel further than positive ones

Capitalize on the fact that people love to bitch about things when given the opportunity Generally speaking, going onto a random post you hate and exclaiming how much you hate it is a bit of a tumblr faux pas. Same thing with venting about how much you dislike something. While bringing up the topic yourself and being snippy to specific people are frowned upon, however, places like polls that provide an opportunity to bitch about things are a great outlet, and a LOT of people will take it

Take advantage of the poll's inherent anonymity This may seem counterintuitive-- the person posting the poll and everyone reblogging it aren't anonymous at all! This doesn't matter though, only the votes do. The anonymity of the votes on a tumblr poll turn the opinions of others, no matter their relative size, into a nebulous opinion of the indeterminate masses. THIS is the most important part of the engagement bait, because tumblr users love to complain but aren't likely to do so to someone directly for fear of hurting their feelings or getting called out for being rude. If you can take a dissenting opinion and remove the actual user from the equation, people are far more likely to share exactly what they think about it-- this is when the "no reading comprehension" and "you people seriously think (X)" and "ugh I hate fandom" takes come out en masse. Tumblr users may be mean, but more importantly we are also cowards. In the case of the poll I posted above, even extremely small minority opinions were being commented on in almost every single reblog, despite the fact that these opinions made up less than 10% of the votes for a majority of the poll's run.

More buzzwords, less nuance Buzzwords and a lack of nuance work together to make engagement more likely-- buzzwords are often both overused and misused, while a lack of nuance (typically in the form of a yes or no question) eggs people into explaining themselves. Combine these two and you add people justifying themselves, arguing with others, and complaining about the buzzword in general into your reblogs, boosting your numbers even more. In my case, I chose the lowest of the low when it comes to poll topics: "Is (recognizable character) (buzzword)?". How people fell for this twice I'm not sure, but it works!

If things are getting boring, stir the pot yourself You can use alt accounts or just make up tags yourself, but I was too lazy to do this. However, there's always the option of cherrypicking-- screenshot outlandish or dissenting tags, even if it's just one in a sea of hundreds, and post that in a reblog with an incredulous caption. Bringing tags to the attention of the majority invites new focus on those tags AND your poll, giving people another outlet to add their takes. Some people will likely even reblog it Again.

Now that the bait is set, watch people in your notes talk over themselves like a flock of seagulls

Congrats! You've now made a successful bait poll. Fortunately or unfortunately, mine worked so well that people fell for it twice, both of them got thousands of votes each within the day, my notifications are overflowing, and popular blogs have made posts referencing it. Point proven, hypothesis verified. As they say: easy website.

[baskeigh-ball]

Ignoring the fact that ibis had the ai paint feature a couple years before this whole ai fiasco, after seeing your post, I decided to try it out to see if it really held up. I already knew what you said made no sense, as even stuff like ai painting requires heavy human input that isn't just someone typing a prompt in a thing and looking through thousands of images and somehow still calling it 'art'. Really, it's just some weird advanced bucket.

The ibis ai paint... really sucks. I'm pretty sure it hasn't even been touched since it was added. No matter what I did, I got random colours and whatever colours I had put there looked like it were from a filter, not to mention how my lineart bled everywhere like it was blurred out.

Ibis isn't problematic for adding that feature as not only was it added ages ago, but it was also just a gimmick only added because a few more popular paid programs added them, like Clip Studio Paint. I highly doubt even the company took it seriously considering how poorly built it is. This is actually the one time I'm glad some feature in an app sucks so much.

Another reason why ibis isn't problematic by the mere feature alone is that, when you look at the artists making content during the time of that update, it was received with humour. It was something fun to try, but ultimately dismissed for actual artwork, as nobody would use it to fully paint their works. Nowadays we see something slapped with the words 'ai' and think that it's instantly bad due to the latest issues with it and big corperations/ certain production companies but it isn't. It's just a lot of people abusing what was previously some fun gimmick, which it can still be, and for certain apps, still is. Nobody throws pitchforks at character ai, after all.

You can tell just by the size of this that I'm procrastinating on something. Ima go and let this rot away in your askbox now lol

You really thought this would fade away in my ask box, mwahahaha /j

I wanna start off by saying thank you for holding me accountable, I will admit that I got buzzworded pretty hard in this situation lmao

This information came as a surprise to me-- I was seeing posts pop up within the past week complaining about the ai feature on ibis, so I assumed it was recent. As it turns out, after reading your ask, I discovered that I got a few wires crossed! Because yes, the auto paint feature I referred to in my post has been around for years now, and was never taken seriously anyways

So that was my bad (and yea ur right it's completely unusable, lmao)

But as it turns out, the feature that people have been complaining about DID come out recently. It was called the AI Example feature, I think the idea was that you make a simple drawing and the AI adds 99% of the detail and color, which I've seen a bunch of other programs do.

...and then it was immediately removed due to some pretty major backlash, which, duh

^ This is the only evidence I can find of the 11.2.0 update that included the AI feature on the actual site; their update history stops at 11.1.0. But there's also the news page about the removal of the update, so it's not like they're trying to pretend it never happened.

So tl;dr, I jumped on the hate train a little too quickly and never did enough research to figure out what the actual update was, and that it's been removed by now anyway (which I couldn't have known until today, ofc, but i did kinda post that thing about ibis today so it's still a pretty major oopsie)

I think I can say with confidence now that I agree, ibis paint isn't problematic to use-- they made a mistake with this update, but they actually listened to their users and removed it LITERALLY the next day. So, thanks for letting me know! I'll also edit my last post to prevent any misinformation, just in case people make the same mistake I did :]

[valkerymillenia]

I am getting so seriously worried about the politics in my country (Portugal)...

Basically, the fascist party CHEGA just reelected their leader with 98% of the votes and he's gaining traction, the party rose immensely on the national polls in a very short period and it's very worrisome.

Fascist parties shouldn't even legally exist in my country since the '74 revolution but these guys managed to sneak under the law when they were founded in 2019 and got accepted into Parliament.

And this asshole party leader (Ventura) doesn't even say much of anything in his speeches, he just uses a lot of buzzwords about economy and corruption that people want to hear and speaks with a lot of charisma and outraged yelling that people empathize with. You know, like Hitler in the beginning of his political career.

Everything about him is fascist but whenever people call him fascist he plays the victim and acts offended (or did in the past, lately he says, and I'm paraphrasing, "they call us fascist but if that's what it takes them so be it").

He says he wants to tax the rich and support the people (because that's what people want to hear but he hates minorities, discriminates women and is a homophobe but is too scared to talk about the topic any further because he knows people would hate his opinion on it).

He says he wants to limit immigration (because he's a xenophobe and appealing to the 'they are taking our jobs' boomer mentality, forgetting that we have millions of our own immigrants living abroad).

He says he wants to end corruption (but never mentioned how or what is corrupt specifically), he says we lose billions every year to corruption and it needs to end (but he doesn't say where those billions go or show any proof or say how he'll fix it).

He says we need to take away the aids and rights of the Romani people because they are leeching the economy dry (lies, he's just a racist and refuses to listen to actual data, opting instead for blaming everything on a heavily discriminated and stereotyped minority group like a certain dictator we all remember well).

He says he wants to cut stupid taxes like the IUC and IMI (but he doesn't tell you that in exchange he wants to privatize education and healthcare for a profit, essentially making them unattainable to the poor).

And many other extremely radical right-wing ideas.

The problem is- there IS corruption, our government is currently super unstable due to scandals and the prime minister quitting and forcing early elections, the economy is total shit and interest for housing and inflation have gone up so much that a lot of people can't even afford food (mostly because the market has been using the pandemic and the Ukraine war as an excuse to jack up prices indiscriminately, achieving record profits while the people struggle).

So the thing is, people are just getting so desperate that they are willing to listen to the fascist just because he pretends to emphasize and be outraged in their stead.

Most of the CHEGA supporters I talk to don't even know what the party wants to institute or what they stand for, they just say that Ventura wants to end corruption and isn't afraid to fight the government for it so they support him, it's like they all forgot the fascist dictatorship we were in until the 70s (or maybe the ones that actually remember how bad it was are just dying out).

I'm actually starting to get really scared with how quickly these guys are rising to power, specially since Ventura plans to run for prime-minister.

[majorbaby]

you are literally trans. reblogging from a terf and agreeing with her definition of a women i have to laugh. by putting that post on your blog in what i assume is a queer space (for you) is infesting the waters of fandom tumblr with terf ideology. it doesnt matter if its "feminist" that post is not including trans women in it's definition of women. this is actually how terfs work they post innocuous "feminist" posts and that the majority of people will agree with and that will be reblogged onto tumblrs that are not terfs or terf adjacent and then onto feminist tumblrs that may agree but not be terfs and if they are lucky a big blog will reblog and then they will get followers it's how they recruit. they don't even hide that they do this, former terfs have posted and confessed this is what they do. it doesn't matter if you agree or not passing their posts around is contributing to poisoning the waters of fandom space and queer communities online. a disturbing amount of young queers online agree with terf ideology now because of this "i don't vet" "ops post don't reflect them" mentality. i seem to remember a time when queer tumblr blocked and removed terfs from their blogs and didn't give terfs a single inch on here because otherwise they will get see you reblogging terfs and see oh a terf let me follow. and suddenly you have a anti trans terf blog not a queer fandom blog. being accepting of all ideology also means being intolerant of hateful ideology as well. and i'm sorry to sound harsh. but if you ARE genuinely agreeing with terf ideology as elementary as that post was then you may have to take a few steps back and reassess why that is.

do you think if i reblog enough gifsets of trapper and hawkeye dancing together i can infest/poison the waters of fandom tumblr/queer communities online/young queer minds with visions of tender gay sex because i've been doing that like every single day for the past two years but there doesn't seem to a metric i can use to measure if i'm making a difference :(

like you, i consider this to be a distinct and achievable goal that i should be personally responsible for, especially if it's the case that i am literally trans as you say, so i'm going to take a few steps back and reassess how i can do better.

in all seriousness, i actually do not live in fear of being falsely labelled a terf or someone who condones the ever expanding collection of buzzwords and phrases that seem to qualify as "terf ideology" as defined by whoever is screaming the loudest at any particular moment.

i don't think you're sorry for shit, you're just parroting the same paranoid, hypothetical, presumptuous stuff being lobbed at anyone, trans or not, who doesn't performatively follow a set of arbitrary rules for online interaction that establishes them as being morally pure. it sure would be nice if we could only just think of the children and reliably cleanse "online queer communities" of transphobia just by doing that. but since you're of the belief that there was "a time when queer tumblr blocked and removed terfs from their blogs and didn't give terfs a single inch on here" and yet "anti trans terf blogs" have never gone away, then i have to wonder if your proposed solution actually does anything except make you feel like you've done something to tangibly combat transphobia.

[feeshies]

correct me if i'm wrong, but i was under the impression that the term "unalive" was mostly used at first as a way for people to point out the absurdity of using euphemisms to avoid "unmonetizable" language.

seriously, the delivery that always seemed to come with the term used to go like:

"...and then after hamlet's father was ki-- oh, youtube isn't going to like it if i say that. after hamlet's father was un...alived..."

it was supposed to be purposefully bad and absurd. almost as if to say "see how dumb this sounds? it's clunky, and no one is offended by the word i'm replacing. it's almost like there's no point in censoring it"

but now i see "unalive" used as a synonym for "kill" or "die". even on platforms where monetization and working with algorithms doesn't matter. i see "unalive" in ao3 tags, youtube comments, reddit threads. i understand using shorthand for trigger warnings (i.e. "tw: sa, sh" etc), but something about seeing "unalive" or "grape" or "yahtzee" in an otherwise serious post just drives me nuts.

and this isn't even touching on the everyday use of euphemisms for words like "lesbian" "trans" "gay" "black" "poc".

yes, a lot of platforms will prioritize sanitizing language for the sake of profits, which forced a lot of creators to find workarounds. but, and not to use another buzzword, but i hate seeing this shit normalized.

i'm really trying not to sound like a luddite. but sometimes it's really hard.

[proship-ghost]

how does it feel to be proship btw. to be alienated in every single community you try to join, every fandom. all you have is your other freak friends jacking off to incest rape porn or whatever the fuck lmaooo

you're all so sad and you should kill yourselves so we don't have to look at you.

like seriously, whens the last time a person sat down and told you that they genuinely enjoyed having you around and enjoyed your company as a friend? when? don't lie now.

like the fact that you pedohpiles use "uhhh but it recontextualizes my trauma!!!" i have those traumas and i literally hate you for trivializing this shit so you can jack off.

kill yourself. seriously

Funny how you assume EVERY proshipper ships age gap ship, and simp for lolis/shotas.

It's great actually! I love being with my little freak friends that don't tell others to kill themselves over fictional characters! It's amazing to not be so tied down by bullshit morals and being free to enjoy what I like where it hurts no one.

Actually quite frequently people enjoy my presence because I make them feel welcome for their issues and ideas- maybe you could learn to do the same. I'm sure your parents are so proud of you for standing up to those big scary proshippers, aren't they?

You really throw the most buzzwords together and say that encompasses everyone in a community, don't you?

I have never said it "recontexualizes my trauma" I tag and warn EVERY thing I say you can easily scroll, but instead you weasel your way into a community for coping with a trauma by relating to characters who have gone through what you have by giving them an opportunity to cope and thrive whereas you cannot.

Also, let's not water down actual pedophilia for liking dark fictional media. You're watering down actual abusers and disgusting people because two cartoon characters look hot together.

Get better soon ❤️

[chemdisaster]

i have seriously grown to hate the word "problematic" so much because at this point like. what the fuck does that even mean. because to me it seriously sounds like just another one of those buzzwords conservative people like to use, like "think of the children" or "traditional family values" and shit. basically code for "this thing disgusts me personally, therefore it shouldn't exist and to convince others of that fact i am going to label it with a smart-sounding word that's really just a substitute for "yucky" to tell them to stay away"

[calzonekestis]

Mason and Grace and Joe became like the Three Musketeers hanging out when they were filming…

Grace has previously said Mason was the only one who really took any photos of their adventures together.

Like I know Mason is too busy having a life and being a swell fella to keep himself informed on internet troll comments…

…but if I were him , and had everyone involved’s blessing?

I wouldn’t be able to stop myself from dropping all the Friendship Receipts and trolling the trolls.

Like all these alleged fans are out here on twitter, it’s chaos, and then - what’s this? It’s Mason Dye with the proverbial steel chair!

Like each tweet about how much Joe hates Grace? It would just get a reply of “lol” and a new old selfie.

“People are being vile towards one of my friends? Spreading bullshit speculation about how our other friend thinks she’s Weird and is just being nice in the press bc he’s a professional but somehow she isn’t?”

I’d just be so petty like “lol throwback to me and the work besties!”

Obligatory Disclaimers: Make no mistake - they don’t owe us proof of friendship. Those are their private memories/moments and we’re not entitled to them sharing them with us.

Do not ask him/them to do so, that’s weird and invasive.

Even if Mason does/did know about the Bullshit, it’s not his place or job to involve himself.

No one involved needs or wants him to fight a battle for them, a battle that they have no interest in having, and he has no obligation to do so.

Grace has said that she doesn’t let the haters get her down, she finds them funny - it’s the “just my opinion!” of it all, along with probably clogging her notifs that is probably annoying to her.

And threats to her safety, which should absolutely be taken seriously.

I’m sure she doesn’t give a flying fuck if people believe that her work friend is actually her friend. She strikes me as more confident than that.

Like. Just because Some People lack any sense of reason, doesn’t mean she does.

“Oh, that’s sweet. I worked with this person almost two years ago, and it resonated as a great experience for them. No none is forcing him at gunpoint to say these things - he must really value my talent and my friendship.”

She knows they’re buddies and that he has a high opinion of her… that it was a great experience, they respect each other as performers.

They had a great experience working together/being scene partners, but even if they didn’t?

I truly doubt it would be soul crushing. Like. They worked together two years ago almost.

Are you friends with every single person you’ve ever worked with?

How about people you worked with intermittently almost two years ago?

I doubt she would take it personally if he didn’t regard her as a friend… but… as it stands… they’re friendly.

They think highly of each other, both as people and performers. They’ve made that clear. Still, how often are they really going to hang out going forward?

Probably at cons. When one is traveling to the other’s corner of the globe for work, maybe they’ll catch up. Maybe. Maybe not. Why do you care?

Whether or not the performers are friends has nothing to do with the dynamic of the fictional characters? It’s not relevant to anything? Nor is it our business?

Like, when you actually enjoy hanging out with the person - it makes the job you’re doing together easier, but. .

Idk. I don’t get it. Whether they’re homies, or not, why is that… idk people Caring so much is just really weird imo.

The Buzzword is Parasocial.

[egg-emperor]

I'm so sorry that you have to deal with people harassing you and slandering you with life destroying accusations. You don't deserve that. It's disgusting how some people think that harassing and harming people over fictional characters is justified. I hope you feel better soon. Stay strong 💪💪💪

I really wish people hadn't seriously watered down the meaning and seriousness of words and accusations and now use them as buzzwords to try to make people they don't like seem as terrible as possible. They'll really try to claim I either partake in or am associated with or people who do all the worst things they can think of, before just admitting they hate me over a difference of opinion and interests in a fictional character and series.

They just want to appear justified in the moral right in hating me so they can turn others against me too because if they don't like and want to associate with me then no one can. And something else that bothers me is how people side with those who are clearly being cruel and hurting me just because they have the same interests and opinions on a character in common, not even caring how nasty they are to me.

It's like they no longer see me as a human deserving of any ounce of respect. But I know who I really am, what I think, and have really done and been through and I hold onto the hope that people will be able to see my true heart in what I do. I'm not going to let hateful people speak for me and beat me down. I'm going to keep being myself and doing what I enjoy and I hope it will continue to be enjoyable to others too.

Thank you so much, I'm doing the best I can in fighting to get through this and I hope I'll see the end of it soon. The support helps a lot! 💜

[violenceslut]

One of the most frustrating things about the liberal/progressive focus on mental health is how people use that as an excuse to harm disabled people under the guise of being helpful or progressive.

Like whenever I try to mention that I can't physically do any of the things required of me without collapsing into a heap on the floor, people's thoughts just go straight to my mood, trying to find an explanation that fits their liberal buzzword psychology theory.

Everyone's quick to suggest that you're fatigued because you're depressed, but will call you crazy if you float the idea that maybe you're depressed because you have a debilitating physical condition that nobody takes you seriously about or whatever. It's just another attempt to outsource the blame onto the notion that "sometimes people get a little depressed or anxious but that's normal" instead of reckoning with the fact that we live in a deeply unjust society that hates disabled people and will chew us up and spit us out the moment it gets an opportunity

[symptoms-syndrome]

Ok here's the tea

So like, it's a server of entirely queer Koreans. And like a MONTH ago, there was sort of a fire because someone said smth like "Korean Christians are all inherently bad people," and I was like "Hey maybe we should avoid making broad generalizations about people who are like. In the server with us. You know, to be respectful." And I was real nice about it and all that jazz. Because I'm a real patient person TBH. I have a pretty high tolerance for Bullshittery. Anyway it turned into a whole Thing because there's like two or three people in there who think they're the shit dot net because they learned fun buzzwords from twitter like "strawmanning" and "gaslighting" and "respectability politics." Which is extremely frustrating because it's absolutely impossible to have a reasonable conversation with them because they do not in any way shape or form actually know what these words mean. One person, completely out of the blue, chimed in with "are we not allowed to complain about white people then?" and then two messages later said that I was strawmanning for making a comparison (I said that while Christianity may have roots in white supremacy, that does not make all those who participate in it inherently white supremacist, similarly to how the beauty industry is also rooted in white supremacy but not all those who wear makeup deserve to get shit for it.) Which is insane bc bestie you're the one strawmanning here.

Anyway it eventually died down (after that person wrote a whole big essay about how they're being silenced and tone policed etc etc etc despite not even being the person who made the original comment, only chiming in to add shit to the fire.) But then yesterday someone who I think is new randomly replies to some of these, again, MONTH old comments, which sparks an outburst of shit again. And this happened last time, but like. The "what about complaining about white people" person was like "um well some of us don't have positive relationships with whiteness/christianity" in a real passive aggressive way and I'm like. Seeeeeeething RN. Like sorry I didn't trauma dump in graphic detail like you did but seriously what a dick fucking move to just assume that I looooooove whiteness and Christianity just because I told you to be mindful that there are some people who are Christian in the server. Like I did not even say you can't criticize Christianity. Anyway this bitch is going offfffff about how the server is sooo unsafe for POC and sooo white and this would never happen in a Black/brown led server (which is insane given that like. First off that's kinda racist of u for a lot of reasons but a lot of the mod team is literally brown in addition to the Korean so like.) and it's like girlie if u think it's so awful here why are u still here. Like I've been in servers where the vibe is rancid and I hate the way it's moderated so I simply Don't Stay in those servers??? What's ur fucking problem???

But anyway they're all like "uwu you simply wouldn't understand, I need a space specifically for People Like Me who have faced racism and Christian oppression" and I'm like GIRLIE I would also be part of those spaces so like!!! Ur not gonna be free from me!!!

and likeeeeeeee not to invalidate anyone's trauma here but their trauma they dumped was fairly middle of the road in terms of like, religious trauma so I COULD absolutely win this pissing contest if I also chose to traumadump I just do not want to at all and also morally disagree with doing so so like. I won't. But I am like. Committing acts of violence mentally RN like girlie what the hell fuck is wrong with you.

[dandizettes]

I really CANNOT when people just genuinely use buzzwords to my face in actual conversation. I mean I also really cannot when they do this online but in person it is especially egregious………………….. even if I agree with what is being said in content, if they’re using the word “sexualize” about it I immediately cannot take the argument seriously (which, this one is among the worst buzzwords imo, like. WHAT IS IT EVEN SUPPOSED TO MEAN. It inevitably makes the person saying it sound puritanical even if the position they’re actually trying to articulate doesn’t square with that and I hate how vague it is and it is just the worst. Honestly)