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ttuesday · 3 years

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Hello there! Thank you for writing all these amazing headcanons! <333 I get so much joy when there's a new post from ya!

I had a prompt in mind: what are the gang members like when they get reaaaaly drunk? Who gets sad & sentimental, who gets all funny and jokey, who is all sleepy, and etc etc etc?

now this is an interesting one hehe

Arthur

When Arthur's drunk, he does his absolute best to try to convince everyone he isn't that drunk. He tries to walk in a straight line to prove he’s ok but accidentally walks into Uncle.

He somehow has great hearing and joins in on every sing song within a five mile radius. Arthur could be talking to you on the outskirts of camp but if he hears someone singing by the campfire, he joins in immediately.

He gets into a very jolly mood when he's drunk and talks about anything and everything. He rambles on about so much he interrupts himself a lot.

If he's sweet on you then Arthur asks to hold your hand and he won’t stop holding your hand for the e n t i r e night. No matter where you go or what you do, Arthur will potter after you with his hand still holding yours. And whenever you look at him, Arthur has a big, proud smile on his face as he looks at your hand in his.

Charles

Who is this man? Where tf did Charles go? He acts very differently than sober Charles. Whatever idea springs to mind, he wants to do it. If he wants to do interpretive dance in the middle of camp then that's exactly what he does or if he decides to go skinny dipping at 4am then off he goes, trying to find a lake or a river.

One second Charles could be laughing so much he's nearly crying, a second later he could start sobbing because he remembered that time he accidentally shot a lawman's horse when he was trying to aim for the guy. Please hug him.

It doesn't matter how drunk Charles is, he can still yeet anyone over Mount Hagen and he can go from fun and goofy to deathly intimidating in under 1.5 seconds.

And if you and Charles are dating then he just wants to kiss you. He kisses your temple all the way down to your jawline before kissing back up to your ear.

Dutch

Dutch gets quiet when he's drunk. He just kinda sits there and stares off in a daze for ten minutes. When someone talks to him, it's like he buffers for a few seconds before responding.

But when he starts talking, good luck trying to get Dutch to shut up. And this man needs everyone to stop what they're doing and give him all of their attention when he decides to say a speech. And if one person stops paying attention then Dutch storms off.

Dutch really does believe he's unstoppable when he's drunk. And if you don't believe him then don't worry, Dutch has no problem spending three hours explaining how all of his plans are apparently bulletproof.

If Dutch is sweet on you then he tries to flirt with you. But the more he drinks, the harder it gets for him to string a sentence together. "Your eyes..." he slurs his words but tries to stay composed "they remind me... of uh... eyes".

Micah

Micah is so goddamn laid back when he's drunk. Strangely people tend to get on with Micah when he's drunk but by the time he's sober again he's gone back to being... well, Micah.

He's nice ? Which is so bizarre but he actually makes an effort to talk to people without antagonising them and instead of taking offence to comments, he laughs them off and sees it as a joke.

As long as the conversation stays light, Micah keeps his happy demeanour and he isn't even a bad loser when it comes to poker and five finger fillet. In a way, seeing Micah so friendly unnerves some of the other gang members because of how baffling it is.

If he's sweet on you then Micah will continuously asks if you'd like to sit on his lap. Of course he flirts with you but he's a lot sweeter than normal and tells you that you could definitely do better than him so he understands if you reject him.

John

John comes out of his shell when he's drunk. Instead of keeping his mouth shut, he says whatever he thinks of. Yeah he gets into more fights cause he doesn't know when to stop talking.

He can fall asleep anywhere and at any time. You could be chatting with him by the campfire and slowly feel him lean against your shoulder as he starts to softly snore. He once fell asleep while standing up right with one of his hands on a barrel for support.

When John tries to go to sleep when he's drunk, he's like a kid trying to go to sleep at a sleepover. John loudly says the most random words and makes random noises before he bursts out laughing, thinking it's the funniest thing in the world.

If John has a crush on you and he's drunk, he tries to be so helpful. He constantly asks you if you need anything. If you ask him to get you something then he walks a few feet away before completely forgetting what you asked for.

Bill

Let's be real, Bill's already a hothead when he's sober and he's exactly the same when he's drunk. He's very fast to start a fight but if someone lands one punch then that's Bill done for the night. Usually he's a better fighter but he has terrible balance when he's been drinking.

He tries to be productive when he's drunk, thinking that now's the perfect time to do some chores and to go on guard duty. Everyone knows better than to leave Bill go out on watch when he's like this. One time he tried to shoot a squirrel cause he thought it was going to run into camp.

Bill rambles a lot too, mainly telling stories from when he was in the army or reminiscing about different robberies he's done with the gang.

Bill can get really anxious so if y'all are in a relationship, he needs your comfort. His mind starts racing and he worries about little things so for you to be there and tell him everything is alright truly means a lot to him.

Javier

Javier gets very goofy when he's drunk. He's keeps things light hearted, joking about things but is still able to hold his tongue when needed and have proper conversations too.

Honestly, Javier is probably one of the most level headed people in comparison to the rest of the gang but because he tends to stumble and get his words mixed up, people presume he's completely wasted when he's had a few to drink.

This man LIVES for those 2am deep and meaningful conversations. He absolutely adores having them and being drunk helps him open up more about his feelings so he has no problem expressing his emotions.

Are you ready to be swept off of your feet, both metaphorically and maybe literally depending on if you'll leave Javier do that? He's such a hopeless romantic when he's drunk. If camp is near a field or woodland then he sneaks off, picks some flowers and shyly gives them to you.

Sean

Sean manages to go through every mood when he's drunk. Everything is funny to him and he tries to make jokes about whatever comes to mind. Usually he jokes about Bill and Micah which leads to one of them arguing with Sean.

That's when Sean gets angry and thinks he's able to knock out anyone with one punch. Normally he ends up accidentally walking into a table or tripping over himself cause of how focused he is at punching the air.

Then Sean gets all sad and sentimental, feeling sorry for himself cause he accidentally bruised his leg. He has no problem sitting on the ground and pouting for a while, hoping that someone will walk past and give him some attention for a while.

If y'all are dating then Sean will tell you over and over again how much you mean to him and how much he loves you. He just wants to cling on to you for the night and make sure you know how loved you are.

Hosea

I hope you're sitting comfortably cause Hosea's gonna tell you every single goddamn story he can think of. Hosea tells you funny stories, sad stories, how he first met John and how he conned rich people. He really likes to reminisce when he's drunk.

Towards the end of the night, Hosea eventually gets quiet and if there's a party at camp where everyone is celebrating, then he goes off by the outskirts for a while.

Hosea likes to sit back and watch as everyone enjoys the night. He can get very sentimental when he does this but he likes to enjoy the little moments of the night and savour it all.

If he’s sweet on you then Hosea makes sure you know how special you are and that you deserve the best. He doesn't necessarily flirt with you but instead wants you to know how great you are.

Sadie

When Sadie drinks, she gets sad. She doesn't mean to get sad but her mind wanders and she thinks a lot about everything that's happened in her life and how she's ended up where she is today.

She doesn't speak a lot and ends up getting stuck in her head with thoughts whirling around and around. It can get overwhelming which is why she isn't that keen on getting completely wasted on alcohol.

She doesn't like how crowded camp can get so instead she likes to go off and find a nice scenic area to rest. Normally that helps calm her mind but Sadie also gets sleepy by then too.

If Sadie likes you and feels comfortable around you then she leans against you as ye both sit there in a peaceful silence. And if you suggest it, then she'll hesitantly rest her head on your lap and fall asleep as you play with her hair.

Kieran

Kieran doesn't get drunk often. He hates waking up the next morning and wondering if he pissed anyone off or said something he shouldn't have.

He's very happy when he's drunk, only seeing the positives in things and always smiling. Kieran is still a little shy but he's more open to being involved with what the gang's doing, whether that be singing along to some songs or dancing with whoever to Dutch's gramophone.

Because of how involved he can become with the gang when he's drunk, he can get involved in a few fights or arguments. But contrary to popular belief, Kieran doesn't back down and makes sure to get his points across.

Kieran gets more confident after a few drinks and flirts with you more than usual. The more accepting you are to his comments, the more he flirts with you. Though if you flirt back then he gets very flustered.

#ayo idk why these are so fuckin long #I tried cutting them down #but they’re still long #so apologies for how goddamn long these are #anywhoosies #arthur morgan #dutch van der linde #micah bell #charles smith #john marston #javier escuella #bill williamson #sean macguire #hosea matthews #sadie adler #kieran duffy #idk why I decided to add Kieran in here too lol

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becca-e-barnes · 3 years

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hi lovely, I wanted to make a request about a sensitive topic, so it's ok if you decide not to.

But if you decide to do it, Zemo x Reader where she has been sexually abused and he comforts her, because I just need him to tell me that it was not my fault.

I sometimes remember the moment it happened and it makes me really sad and guilty. I'm really sorry if this request triggers you. Thank you in advance🖤

Honey omg, can I start off by saying whatever happened was absolutely not your fault. I woke up at 5am and saw this request and I just couldn’t get back to sleep until I had started writing it. I was in a similar situation a few years ago so this is really based off my experience and how I found I dealt with it. While it still upsets me sometimes I’ve found I don’t think about it as often as I used to so it does get better, I promise. I actually found this quite cathartic to write since it’s something I don’t talk about much. If you ever want a little chat, please don’t be scared to shoot me a message! Hope you’re doing okay 💗

Pairing: Helmut Zemo x GN! Reader

(Again, the fact this is gender neutral was a happy accident but I wanted it to be applicable to anyone that might find some comfort in it)

Word count: 1.5 k

Summary: You have a bad night and Zemo comforts you (list of international resources at the end.)

Warnings: TW: Sexual Assault mention, please don’t read this if those themes will upset you. There are no graphic descriptions, this is more just the reader dealing with the aftermath. Hurt/ comfort, quite dark, angst, Zemo does his best but everyone heals differently, fluff.

You weren’t quite sure how it had happened but it had become one of those nights where reality had become a little too heavy to handle. You had went to bed feeling fine but woke in the early hours, head swimming with the recollection of everything that had happened. All of a sudden, sleep was the last thing on your mind, your body jarred awake by the painful memories and the sickly feeling that always accompanied them. Rather than spend the night tossing and turning in bed beside your boyfriend, you got up, hauling your sleep deprived frame from the warmth of your bed, heading to the little snug at the end of the hall. Grounding yourself wasn’t easy when you felt like this, but you had to take the time to notice the little things or risk losing yourself in the past altogether. You let yourself notice the little breeze that came in through the window down your hall, the smooth feeling of the wooden bannister under your fingertips and the cold that travelled up your bare legs as your feet padded softly across the wooden floor. Your pyjama shorts tickled the tops of your thighs as you walked the short distance before you gently pushed the heavy wooden door, admiring how it manoeuvred silently under your touch, despite it’s weight. None of these things were particularly special, often lost in the monotony of day to day life but during these early mornings where the past felt all too real, they were little blessings, reminders of the present.

Closing the door behind you quietly, you made your way over to the little cushioned window ledge. It had been extended so it was easily large enough to sit on, giving you a vantage point to look out the topmost window of the house, completely unobstructed. You settled into the familiar spot, legs crossed in front of you. From here you could see everything that went on in the grounds of Helmut’s massive estate. You could see the little stream running down beside your house, often your favourite point of focus as it was ever changing and therefore, distracting. Huge birds swooped and dived at the lake, hoping to procure some breakfast for themselves and their young, some flying off triumphantly with a tasty fish while others left with nothing, frustrated by the difficulties of hunting. Apart from the running water and their squawks, there were no other sounds to disturb the early morning air.

The birds were an adequate distraction for around an hour before you began to lose interest, feeling your mind wander once more in a direction you didn’t want it to take. That pang of guilt hit you deep in the chest as you began to feel like your body was tainted in some way. Horrible memories flooded your head, memories of roaming hands and that feeling of being painfully helpless, your chest feeling like it might collapse under the weight of those memories. You had no more tears left to cry when you thought about what had happened, while it still hurt as intensely as it did, the memories weren’t often accompanied by tears anymore, rather a guilty ache in your chest that threatened to consume you and you honestly weren’t sure which was worse. A good cry used to get it all out, give you the opportunity to start fresh and you often felt all the better for it when you were done but the ache was harder to manage. You hated how this was now something you had to live with, knowing that someone else’s actions had such a huge reign over your life.

You were so lost in thought, you hadn’t even noticed Helmut slipping in behind you until you heard the faint click of the heavy wooden door.

“Bad night my love?” He asked softly, his voice barely disturbing the calm, his accent noticeably thicker after he had just woken up. He was still in a little thin pair of cotton pyjamas, hair messy and tousled from sleep. You could only nod in response, noticing how his lips pressed together so he didn’t voice his anger about the person that had done this to you. He didn’t want the focus of this to be on them and their selfish actions, that wasn’t helpful but it didn’t stop his blood boiling in his veins. Dealing with this was often as hard for him as it was for you, seeing the only person he loved so dearly feel the way you did, knowing you were hurting and he wasn’t able to take the pain away sometimes brought him to a very dark place.

“May I touch you?” He whispered quietly, knowing that sometimes having that contact could be worse for you.

“Please.” You nodded simply, feeling his body slot in behind yours. His legs bracketed yours, arms wrapped around your waist and his head buried in the crook of your neck as you both went back to watching the birds silently. His heart beating in his chest was comforting against you, the rise and fall of his breathing giving you something else to focus on.

“This is not your cross to bear alone, my dove.” He whispered, thumbs rubbing at the exposed skin of your waist where your pyjama top had ridden up slightly.

“I know I just… Didn’t want to wake you.” You replied, equally softly.

“How many times must I tell you sweetheart, I want you to wake me. Let me be there for you.” He pleaded, pressing little kisses to your shoulders, hoping to rid your arms of the goosebumps that had begun to form. He was not mad, not at you anyway, understanding that sometimes you just needed the time alone to come to terms with things but if you needed him, he wanted to be there. There was a heavy pause that hung in the air after that, both of you slightly weighed down by the gravity of the emotions this can inflict on you as a couple.

“Can I talk about it?” You asked softly. It wasn’t something you did very often, preferring not to burden Helmut too much with the details. He had heard it all before so nothing would surprise him but you were still conscious that it hurt him to hear what had happened.

“Of course.” He answered, gentle chaste kisses to your shoulders reminding you that this was entirely on your terms. He did not press you to talk further when you had said enough, he also didn’t let his own pain at the situation take away from yours, knowing if you needed to talk about it, he had to be there to listen. You took a deep breath, taking one of his hands in yours, clasping them together.

“I just feel… Tainted? I feel guilty. Feel like I could’ve done more to stop it.” You knew you couldn’t have done more but there was always a nagging sense of ‘what if’. Helmut nodded from behind you, giving your hand a little squeeze, waiting to see if you wanted to continue. “Feel like it’s my fault. And now I have to deal with it. But you don’t have to.” You explained quietly, ache in your chest growing to sharp pain.

“You are not tainted my love. Nor was it your fault. You could not have done more to prevent it and even if you could, that is not the point. You shouldn’t have had to do more. One ‘no’ should have been enough.” It killed him to know you thought like this about yourself. He didn’t see you like that at all. Your body wasn’t tainted from what had happened, it didn’t make him want you less. It made him admire your strength and courage, seeing how you got up every morning and took care of the body you blamed. “Your blame is misplaced my love. The blame is not yours to carry. You have done no wrong.” His words made warmth flourish in your chest, hearing him listen to you and truly understand meant more to you than he would ever know.

“Thank you Helmut.” You whispered, tears brimming in your eyes, spilling over your cheeks but not from sadness, more from the unconditional love Helmut afforded you, the time he took to make you be gentler to your body again making you feel more loved than you could’ve imagined possible.

“Not at all, my sweet.” He whispered, gripping you just a little tighter. He loved you, every single part of you. To him, you were perfect and nothing would change that. He just wanted to help you through your pain and absolve you of it, hoping some day you could see yourself how he saw you.

A/N: I’m going to drop this link here just in case it’s needed, this was the most comprehensive resource I could find. If you need it, please do use it. 💗

https://osapr.harvard.edu/international-resources-0

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sirthisisa-wendys · 3 years

Text

The Regular (part 3): Geto Suguru x Fem!Reader

synopsis: for Geto, there’s no one but you. And he wants that to be the same for you, too. Why would you even want anyone else?

wc: 2.4K

tw: nsfw, nsfw, nsfw, please for the love of god dni if you’re minor. smut and more smut follows

a/n: There will be one last part for. wrap-up, but I literally have not written a single thing since before yesterday, so I’m writing today! Hope you all enjoy!

part 1 part 1.5 part 2

Your finger fidgeted with the edge of your skirt as you sat in Mrs. Lampton’s office, waiting for her freckled face to appear in your line of vision. The office is a direct reflection of who Mrs. Lampton is: dimly lit with orange lighting and vintage movie posters hang on the right side of the wall above a mini zen garden; on the left side, there are various pictures of her as a dancer, the newspaper headline announcing that she had bought the club, and then a picture that featured her and all of the dancers from years ago. On her desk, the club manager had collected various crystals, each one a different color than the rest, and finally, on the wall behind her desk, a sign that read “Complaints will be heard from the hours of 6 am to 3 pm”, which, coincidentally, were hours when the club wasn’t open.

She had called you in early to discuss something with you, but hadn’t shown her face at all since you walked in and plopped down on the cheap, orange vinyl seat. A moment later, the door to the office creaks open and Mrs. Lampton shuffles in, pushing her short red bangs away from her face. “Hey, y/n, thanks for coming in early for me. Just wanted to speak to you face to face before tonight.” She sounded exhausted, as if she had been dealing with other problems before she got to you.

“Am I in trouble?” you ask, lacing your fingers together nervously.

“Huh?” The woman looks over at you as she slides the chair out from behind her desk. She shrugs her denim jacket off, revealing the multi colored striped shirt beneath paired with light wash mom jeans. “Why would you think you’re in trouble? Have you done anything to be in trouble for?” She leans forward, placing her pale elbows on the desk and looking into your eyes.

“No, I--”

“Good. You’ve made yourself practically invaluable here and I wanted to make sure everything was going okay with you and Mr. Geto.” You think about the morning you spent with Suguru and the subsequent night you danced for him in the VIP room, which ended up being a makeout session towards the end.

“E-everything’s fine.”

“He’s treating you fairly?”

“Yes.”

“Not getting too ahead of himself is he?”

“Ahead of himself?”

“You know, trying to play savior or--”

“No, not at all.” In fact, he had insisted that you go back to the club that night and dance, even if it meant it was just you and him. He knew you liked the club; he was just there to make your experience happier.

“Great! Oh, also --” A drawer opens and Mrs. Lampton rummages around in it for a moment before pulling out a magazine. “Thought you would like to see this.” She slaps it down on the desk before turning to her computer and clicking around on it while you pick up the magazine. And there Suguru was, on page twenty-six, strolling alongside his blue-eyed friend - what was his name? Godo? Todo? Gego? Oh, Gogo. Right.

The headline reads: “Their Companies are Merging, but They’re Total Opposites”. Suguru is dressed for a business meeting in a pair of black slacks and black shirt, complimented by a silver tie. Gogo, on the other hand, is wearing a grey turtleneck sweater and black skinny jeans, also in mid-conversation about something. The caption reads: Geto Suguru and Gojo Satoru have a lot in common: they’re handsome, inherited their wealth, and are very eligible bachelors. But what you don’t know is that they couldn’t be more -

“Why are you showing me this?” The magazine plops down on the desk again and Mrs. Lampton looks over from her screen.

“You need to know exactly who you’re entertaining. Geto’s family owns an international medical equipment giant, and his friend is literally the heir to the technology company Gautama.”

You bite your lip at this news, suddenly remembering the magnitude of the situation at hand. Again, Suguru wasn’t just rich, and people didn’t just get into his personal business because he was handsome. One day, he would be the heir to a massive fortune and a company that relied on the public’s approval to maintain its efficacy. One wrong move, and Suguru could lose it all. You need to handle this predicament with care, not with some kind of illusionary idea that he could be--

“I see. Thank you, Mrs. Lampton.” The club manager shifts in her seat, giving you a tender smile before sliding an envelope your way.

“And this came for you yesterday after you left.” Curious, you open the envelope, and look back up at Mrs. Lampton warily. “Do with it what you will.”

“I can’t accept this; this is-”

“Not my problem anymore. I’ll see you later, y/n.”

_______________________________________________________________________

“I can’t accept this.” You hand the envelope and it’s contents back to Suguru, and he frowns deeply, hand slowly reaching out to take the paper.

“What’s this?” He opens the envelope and takes out the check nestled inside, examining it carefully. “Oh, no.”

“I can’t accept money from your friend.”

“No, this isn’t right. Satoru would never…” Suguru shifts forward, trying to examine the check under the dim lighting of the room. “He would never do something like this. He’s an idiot, but he’s not a dumbass.”

“Why would he send me a check for twenty thousand dollars?”

“He wouldn’t.” Suguru folds the envelope in half, placing it in his pocket with finality. “I’ll deal with this, princess, don’t worry.” He places a tender kiss to your forehead, peppering your face with pecks until his lips reach yours. You moan into his mouth and slide your hands up to his, which are holding your face, and open your mouth to deepen the kiss automatically. Your tongues tangle between each other, dancing in the space made by your interlocked lips. When Suguru pulls away, you groan, leaning your head back with displeasure.

“I want you tonight,” you whisper, and Suguru laughs, nipping at your lower lip.

“You needn’t say another word.”

_______________________________________________________________________

A long-sleeved kimono.

A pair of men’s pants.

A silk camisole and matching shorts.

A grey shirt.

All of them have been scattered across the room leading up to the four poster bed you’ve been politely deposited on. And the man between your legs is starving.

He’s putting his hair up in a bun with a hair band, shirtless, while his muscles move methodically. And you’re lying before him, a spread of deliciousness waiting to be devoured by someone who has been deprived of your taste for too long.

Once Suguru’s hair is no longer an issue, he slides his fingers between your legs, catching the slim digits on your core. You suck in a sharp breath as he begins rubbing your clit, relishing in the gentle touches he lavishes upon you. “Talk to me.”

“That feels good,” you immediately respond to his command, fluttering your eyes closed. Suguru hums, the answer satisfying him enough that he slips a finger inside of you. You arch your back, pushing your cunt into his palm eagerly and mewling just a little.

“That’s it…” His free hand comes up to snake around the back of your neck and his lips come down to latch onto your right nipple. The hand on your neck slides down to tweak your other nipple as he pulls and sucks with his mouth eagerly, and you buck into his hand again as he tucks another finger inside of you, fully tethering you to his movements.

“S-Suguru,” you breathe, and his eyes lift to meet yours, focusing on your blissed-out expression. The wine you tossed back before you both began your little tryst wasn’t doing you any favors, and your head swam at the lust-filled expression Suguru wore. Your nipple pops free from his lips and he blinks slowly, tilting his head like he always does when he’s about to ask you a question.

“Has anyone else made you feel like this?” he wonders above you, and you look up to him, eyes half-lidded.

“No.”

“Can anyone else make you feel like this?”

“No… no one else can.” Your response to his stance of absolute ownership obviously pleases him as he snakes kisses down your stomach and flicks your clit with his tongue, fingers still nestled deep inside of you. “Su!” Instinctively you grab his hair, lacing your fingers through the strands as you push his face closer to your core. Suguru grains with pleasure, removing his fingers and diving head first into you without another word; his slick-covered hand pushes your right leg up, and the other hand rests on your hip lazily.

But his tongue is anything but lazy as he eagerly attacks your slit, reminding you just how hungry he really is. When his other hand moves off of your hip and to the outline of his cock in his boxers, you want to help him palm his erection, wind your fingers around his length and tug, but you’re too far away. The solution comes moments later.

“Su,” you begin, huffing as he continues to eat you out, but looks up to meet your eyes. “I want… I want to sit on your face.” His eyebrows shoot up at the request, and the black haired man pulls away from your core and kisses up your right leg before sitting up on his knees.

“Then switch with me.”

The command is yet again met with no resistance, and once Suguru settles in on his back, you carefully swing your leg over his shoulders, lowering yourself onto his face. Large hands rest on your ass cheeks as he resumes his feast, and your tiny hands find his cock, snaking beneath the waistband of his boxers with ease.

When you first touch his member, he jolts a little then moans directly into your pussy. You never really noticed just how thick he was until that moment, sliding the offending fabric down until his cock is right in front of your face. You stroke it - fingers not even close to meeting around his thickness - and lick the tip with care then lower your whole mouth down his length.

“Oh, my god,” Suguru moans, the sound muffled by your thighs so it sounds more like a breathy “uhhmahgah” than anything else. You begin to bob your head and build a rhythm to your sucking, rarely stopping for air. You know you’re doing a good job when Suguru’s fingers on your ass tighten and his tongue stutters as you slowly build his orgasm. In the dim lighting of your usual, beautiful hotel room, you hope that no one can see you or Suguru pleasuring each other with abandon. That would make a very interesting headline.

“Ah!” Suguru flips you over with a push which lands you on your back, head facing the footboard. He climbs over top of you, eyes still focused on your face, and lifts your legs back up, pushing your knees to your chest.

“You were doing your job a little too well down there,” he hisses, lining himself up with your dripping core. You laugh for a second before he anchors himself with the backs of your knees and slowly sinks into you, hissing as he sheaths himself completely within your walls. Missionary… he loves it, and you do too, especially when he leans forward and presses his chest against your weak thighs. He can watch your face as he moves within you, and it’s the very fact that he’s the cause of your immense pleasure that spurs him on to a mind-bending orgasm. But you want something different… something new.

“Wait,” you breathe, and Suguru looks up at you with curiosity. “We should… try something new.” Your mind flips through the endless pages of the Cosmopolitan rags in the dressing room, and you settle on something you’d seen just before your second day at the club. You lift one leg up precariously, and Suguru instantly catches on to your imagined position, turning you on your side. While snatching a pillow from behind him, he tucks your lifted leg over his shoulder and places the pillow under your back, where it supports you from falling over.

“Fuck yes, that’s amazing,” you whine. He slides back into you with ease, holding your leg as he fucks you senseless.

“Oh, yeah…” His groans mixed with your mewls of ecstasy fill the room, making a sweet symphony of noise for the neighbors (or someone above you) to hear. Skin slapping, grunts, rough touches and tender caresses - everything you’ve grown to anticipate and desire from this man who has absolutely bewitched and been bewitched by you - are present right now. Nothing could take you out of this dream turned reality. “Y/n… this is heaven.”

The admission from the man is accompanied by a stare that reaches down to your soul, and your hand flies to your clit. You want to make yourself cum and fast. He’s saying all the right things… doing all of the right moves, and you --

“I can’t let anyone else have you.”

“Su--” you choke out, hoping that he would hear your pleas beyond his pleasure. “Su, I--”

“Don’t need… t’say... a word,” he grunts. “I already... know.” He gets faster and deeper, stretching you past what you thought you could take and bringing you even closer to orgasm than you thought possible. “Just cum... Cum for me... That’s all I want.”

Your fingers are working just like Suguru is, not pausing for even a second to give you any sense of reprieve. He litters kisses along your ankle and down your calf, all the while fucking your brains out. His hands knock your fingers away and do what only he can do, rubbing your clit better and faster than you can.

“Please… cum for me, princess.” Hot air drags into your throat and you exhale in what sounds like a dying woman’s groan, clutching at the sheets with all of your strength. Your walls spasm around his cock, and a wetness drenches your lower legs, sliding down onto the red fabric beneath you.

“You’re so perfect,” Suguru whispers, closing his eyes. “You’re such a good girl… cumming all over me like that; god, I’m gonna--” His breath hitches in his throat as he unloads in you, his cock throbbing angrily as it deposits loads of cum inside of you. He shudders long and hard, practically hunched over your figure while you recover, panting deeply.

A haze settles nicely over you while Suguru adjusts himself carefully and softly smooths a hand over your sweaty face.

“Do you want to go again or should we call for new sheets?”

“Again,” you answer definitively, and he smiles down at you before pressing a kiss to your cheek and murmuring,

“I love it when you say that.”

#geto x reader #jjk geto #geto suguru #jujutsu kaisen getou #getou x reader #getou suguru #getou smut #jjk smut #jjk #jujutsu kaisen #yes #gojo is being messy #but you'll see why at the end #i swear i won't leave y'all hanging #im doing too much #doing too much

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mascwhump · 3 years

Text

Trenches, Part 2

Chapter 2: Good Luck, Corporal Mosaix

My GOD I AM SO EXCITED TO POST THIS. Sorry it took so long!

CW: drunk whumper, brief verbal abuse

Tag list: @whatwasmyprevioususername @milk-carton-whump @whumpasaurus101 @whatwhumpcomments @ashintheairlikesnow @tears-and-lilies @utopian819

Charlie awoke to find himself handcuffed to the foot of the bed. It took over an hour for Basil to come upstairs and free him.

“He’s piss drunk and it’s noon,” Basil whispered as they headed down the stairs. Sure enough, Mallory was slumped over the kitchen counter, clutching a glass of whiskey. He slowly uprighted himself when he heard their footsteps enter the room.

“You’re a fucking sorry excuse for a person, you know that? Get the fuck out of my sight,” he slurred as he took another swig of whiskey.

“Where do you want me to go?” Charlie asked.

“Away! Go away!” Mallory yelled.

Charlie retreated to the safety of Basil’s room. They sat on his bed in an awkward silence until Basil pulled out his phone.

“Do you like TikToks?” Basil asked.

“What the fuck’s a TikTok?” Charlie asked.

“Oh, yeah,” Basil sighed, realizing just how long Charlie had been away from the real world.

“Here.”

He showed him a bunch of his favorite videos and managed to get a few laughs out of him. They then shifted to YouTube. Charlie felt happy for the first time in awhile. It was nice to be able to see some of the content he had been missing.

“Hey,” Charlie said after the video had ended, “What do you think would happen if I ran out the front door right now?”

It took Basil a moment to wipe the shock off of his face and think of a response.

“Well, Nikolas is asleep, and… I don’t know, Char,” he replied, “I don’t think you should risk it.”

“I can’t do this much longer,” Charlie said, “I’m willing to try.”

“I’m not going to try and stop you, but… I’m supposed to be watching you, and-“

“Pretend I knocked you out.”

Basil thought for awhile before nodding.

“If you make it, I just want to say that I hope to meet you again under better circumstances,” he whispered.

“I do, too,” Charlie replied. He took a deep breath before heading to the door. Basil lied on the floor and pretended to be unconscious.

The house was silent. Charlie moved as quietly as possible. There was no sign of Mallory or Nikolas. He swiped Mallory’s wallet from the counter and took every bit of cash out of it. His heart pounded against his chest as he unlocked the front door. He stepped outside and shut it silently before beelining down the steps and down the road. Tears began to stream down his face as he ran, not even paying attention to the rocks that cut into his socks.

He made it to the end of the street and decided to go right. The number of houses increased as he eventually made it into town. His lungs were on fire and he couldn’t feel his legs, but he didn’t stop running until he made it into a strip mall. He went into the Walmart.

“Hey, can’t be in here without shoes, bud,” an employee said.

“Sorry, my shoes were ruined. I’m going to buy some,” Charlie said.

“Okay. Go straight there, then,” the employee replied.

Charlie tried to his best to wipe the distress off his face and calm himself. He pulled out the cash he stole to count it as he walked toward the shoes. There were a couple hundreds, to his relief. He picked out a pair of shoes and a brand new set of clothes, along with a hat and sunglasses. He picked out a handful of snacks. He then checked out and changed in the bathroom. He was in disguise now, and felt alright going outside.

Luckily, a motel was on the corner. He went straight there and got a room for the night, just until he could figure out what to do. The entire situation was extremely overwhelming, and he lied down on the bed. He was alone. He was safe. He was free.

Charlie woke up hours later to a loud knock on his door. He felt nauseous. His plan had failed. How could he have been so stupid to believe that he was free? He tiptoed to the door and looked through the peephole to find a well-dressed man and woman he hadn’t seen before. He worked up the courage to open the door.

“Charlie Mosaix?” The woman asked. Charlie nodded. She and the man held out badges.

“Agents Madison Homer and Douglas Brown, CIA. May we come in?”

“Okay,” Charlie said.

They followed him back into the room and shut the door. They all took a seat, and Charlie wiped his sweaty palms on his pants.

“You were supposed to be released a few days ago,” Agent Homer said, “We found you through facial recognition devices. Corporal, I’m not going to take up much of your time. We’re here on behalf of The United States. Because of the things you have endured for the development of security in this nation, we are offering you an assortment of things in exchange for your silence.”

Charlie’s head was spinning. She continued on.

“Along with an honorable discharge, The United States is providing you with $10,000 a month for the rest of your life, as well as a $1.5 million apartment in Seattle. More can be negotiated. I just need you to sign this paper stating that the events that have occurred over the past seven or so months will never leave you under any circumstance.”

“What if I refuse?” Charlie asked.

“Then, Corporal Mosaix,” she sighed, “I would have to take you into custody and you would never see the light of day again.”

Charlie took the pen from her outstretched hand.

“Did my team sign this paper?” He questioned.

“Every single one of them,” she replied.

“Can I see them again?”

“Yes, as long as you don’t conspire to do anything against our agreement.”

“What’s going to happen to… him?”

“I can’t answer that.”

Charlie took a deep breath before bringing the pen to the paper. He scribbled his name across the line, and it was taken from him almost as soon as he finished. Agent Brown set his briefcase on the table and opened it. Inside was a set of keys, an iPhone, cash, and multiple documents.

“These are yours. The papers contain your agreements and your new address, as well as any phone numbers you may need, along with my own. Good luck, Corporal Mosaix,” Agent Homer said.

The agents left the room almost as quickly as they came. Charlie sat in silence for awhile. Everything was happening far too quickly. Eventually, he picked up the phone. It had already been set up with his old account, and had all the photos and contacts he had before. His thumb hovered over Crow’s name. He hesitated before finally making the call.

He answered almost immediately.

“Charlie?”

“It’s me.”

“Where are you?”

“Reno, I think. I think I’m going to Seattle, though. I don’t know. I don’t really know what’s going on. Where are you?”

“London. Are you… did you get out?”

“Yes.”

“Alright. I’ll, uh… I’ll meet you in Seattle, then?”

“Okay.”

#easton’s unnamed story #oc #whump oc #whump #whump story #whumpee

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selkiesbittybonanza · 4 years

Text

500 Followers Appreciation Bitty Profiles! (+ Bonus bitty!) (ALL FREE TO ADOPT)

Fellswap Gold Lamia Bittys

Merlot

Snake: Taipan

Venomous?: Yes

Size (Bitty): Length - 0.5-1m (1.6-3.3 ft.), Standing - 0.25-0.5m (0.8-1.6 ft)

Size (Full Sized): Length - 1.5-2m (5-6 ft), Standing 1-1.25m (3-5 ft)

Merlots are very calm and soothing bittys, they always seem to have it together. It can be easy to let them take control of things – you always feel like they have your best interests at heart. Merlots are very distinguished, they don’t appreciate looking disheveled, it gives them an almost “old man” quality. A Merlot’s nest is impeccably clean – you may even find a doily or two! And they somehow have a bowl of no-name candy to offer guests like a strange satire on how seniors live everywhere. However he had an eye for quality and doesn’t accept poor quality furnishings. While a Merlot doesn’t mind taking charge, he appreciates an adopter who takes initiative. A Merlot isn’t above using intimidation to get his way, but he’s so smooth about it you have a hard time noticing! He prides himself in being unflappable, to demand respect without screaming for it. He certainly has a devious side – he didn’t get this far without knowing how to “play the game” and isn’t above a few white lies for the sake of it. He can be quite paternal as well, he enjoys taking younger bittys under his “wing” and helping raising them. While he can seem rather stiff he’s actually a warm-hearted bitty who enjoys cuddles and being needed.

Espresso

Snake: Black-tailed Criibo

Venomous?: No

Size (Bitty): Length - 0.75-1m (2.4-3.3 ft), Standing - 0.25-0.5m (0.8-1.6 ft)

Size (Full Sized): Length - 2-2.5m (7-8.5 ft), Standing - 1-1.5m (3-5 ft)

Despite the name: Espressos aren’t very active bittys. They mostly prefer the quiet – gaming and drawing are their favourite hobbies. They tend to be shy and soft spoken – loud people can startle them into muteness and a lot of the time they prefer to communicate in non-verbal ways. If you want a gaming companion an Espresso is your perfect bitty match: but be warned – gaming is a fixation for them. If you ask them to not continue a game until you can play it together later it’s almost unfair to them, they’ll become obsessed with what’s next. Games with both single player and co-op content is more ideal – he can work on the single player campaign while he waits for you to come back to the co-op campaign. His shyness makes multi-player gaming a bit hit or miss – he doesn’t like gaming where a lot of communication and strategy is necessary – he prefers staying quiet and working towards objective without any instruction given or taken. His exception is co-op, he loves playing games together with you and feels his most accomplished when you both complete a challenging level together. He isn’t super competitive but takes pride in his skills so be careful setting up play-dates with bittys that may not appreciate losing to a quiet, seemingly submissive bitty. Despite his quiet and gentle nature he isn’t one to allow people to take advantage of him or disrespect him – he will stand up for himself, usually by exiting the situation instead of getting into an argument, and when pushed, he WILL fight back. He is surprisingly skilled and controls his magic well.

G!Siblings Ampitheres

So I decided to give my ampitheres the same human-like intelligence of all my other lamia bittys, but restrict them to a one-size bitty like my Harpys. Honestly a full size ampithere’s wingspan would make them pretty tough to house indoors…

Suave

Snake: Bolen’s Python

Venomous?: No

Size: 1-1.5m long (3-5ft), 0.5m (2ft) standing

Suaves pride themselves on being, well, suave and flirtatious – it helps them stay in control of the conversation and relationship so you don’t discover how much of a dork they really are. Suaves inherited Gaster’s love or building important monuments – like the Core. He’s interested in work that will stand the test of time, with the added benefit of being practical. He’s not interested in building, say: the Pyramids for vainglory. But, if that Pyramid was covered in solar panels that provided electricity for the nearby citizens – that’s up his alley. He also has an interest in motorized vehicles like cars, trucks and motorcycles – but he admits he’d have a difficult time using one without a lot of modifications. Which could be fun. Suaves love flashy experiments and inventions that leave an impact on his audience: however, when he’s working on his next big thing he ends up working at all hours of the night in his pajamas. His inspirations are flashes of brilliance and a flurry of work, after which, he collapses into a deep sleep for up to 36 hours. Despite appearances Suaves are huge nerds who love to share their work with interested listeners and isn’t above goofy shenanigans. They share a Sans’ sense of humour and laid back attitude – but it’s a mask to cover the whirling chaos of the mind within. Suaves can be surprisingly immature and will get a kick out of pranks and childish humour. A Suave can summon up to four disembodied “hands” to help him work on projects that require dexterity but doesn’t often use constructs in offensive magic. He’s more of a behind-the-scenes guy – but he can certainly manage bone attacks.

Savvy

Snake: Amazon Tree Boa

Venomous?: No

Size: 1.25-1.75m long (4-6ft), 0.75m (2.5ft) standing

While Suaves are the rock star scientists, the Savvys end up being in the babysitter role more times than they’d like. Savvys inherited Gaster’s interest in the soul and physical health of monsters and humans; since Savvys are on the autistic spectrum it helps them understand others better because, although they have trouble empathizing with others, it does not mean they don’t CARE. I head-cannon that smoking is a Gaster-trait and a Savvy’s Papyrus half REFUSES to participate in such a disgusting habit! Therefore Savvy’s tend to have an oral fixation to make up for the lack of smoking: chewing on the end of pencils, pens, their own tails… and rely far too much on caffeine. A Savvy works hard, but on a schedule and his experiments are always tightly controlled as opposed to a Suave’s scientific method. Savvys are polite, distinguished and a bit absent minded when it comes to personal relationships. If you’re looking for a bitty that will faun over you – look elsewhere. While Savvy’s certainly care about their adopters and family they are independent and self sufficient. They can seem humourless but the right touch can send them into giggles, they are very passionate about their interests and appreciate an interested audience (or at least captive). Savvys enjoy being needed and do well in situations where they can work as doctor’s, biologists or psychologists. They’re not judgmental and they like to look at the world with endless curiosity and enthusiasm! Savvys can summon up to four disembodied “hands” to help him work on projects that require dexterity but prefers to use his magical energies in his studies and use of healing magic. His offensive magic abilities are rather stunted because of this.

Bonus Lamia Bitty - Blueberror

Blue Ribbon

Snake: Blue striped Ribbon Snake

Venomous?: No

Size (Bitty): 0.5-1m (1.6-3ft), 0.3m standing

Size (Full Sized):1-1.5m (3-5ft) 0.5m standing

Ribbons are afraid of being alone (autophobic), they know that being alone in the anti-void is what caused their transformations from Blueberries to Blueberrors. They thrive in large families and want to be seen as a friend and protector by the group. Do not adopt one of these guys if you spend a lot of time out of the home and can’t provide them attention. A bitty family is a good stop-gap but they really need validation and one-on-one time with their adopters. Ribbons retain most of their personality traits from their Blueberry days but they’re a little… off. A little, too intense. Ribbons can get caught up in an emotion or situation and can spiral out of control whether the emotion is: joy, anger, frustration, or fear. They need a patient friend who can help them “reset” their emotional clock. Of course, being an Error, it sometimes causes a hard crash that they need to restart from. Depending on the situation they can forget completely what had set them off and will continue along like nothing happened. Other times, they remember what happened but the restart gave them enough time to reprocess so they can move on and get past what set them off. They can get depressed easily especially is someone is afraid or intimidated by him – he knows he’s different now, but he’s still a good guy at heart! A Ribbons magic is star-based – they create star-shaped attacks and can even summon a star to ride around on like Kirby.

Creators

Blueberror created by @loverofpiggies

Fellswap Gold AU created by @blackggggum

G!Sans created by @bouru

Art

Fellswap Gold Sans & Papyrus + Blueberror Lamias commissioned from @calmchapsart

G!Siblings Ampitheres commissioned from @me-and-my-gaster

all art commissioned by me: @sealpointselkie / @selkiesbittybonanza

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loverontheleft · 3 years

Text

MoSex 4

AU with single Kinky Boots!B. Fluff and smut. Parts 1-3 can be found on my Masterlist in my bio. Moodboard by @a-silver-linings-boyfriend

Brendon x reader. Warnings: So...we’ve ( @beautiful-tragic-fallout ) created a points system for smut.

0.25 for handjob

0.25 for fingering

0.5 for blowing him

0.5 for going down on her

0.75-1.0 for sex, vanilla

1.5-2.0 for sex, advanced positions

3.0 for bondage, spanking, other kinks, or public sex.

This chapter has a score of 6.75 along with general filth, some fluff, language, and dirty talk.

Word count: 6.4k

-||-

You smell him before you feel him. It's the fresh, clean scent of his cologne with its lemon undertones, combined with the sweet, intoxicating smell that is the result of the last hour in his bed with his head between your thighs and your soft, desperate cries as he brought you to orgasm again and again.

“What is it, Princess?” His voice is low as he crawls back up the bed, and you relax back against his chest when his hands wrap around your hips. He guides you back so you’re nestled against his gloriously naked body and smiles against your neck where he’s pressing warm, gentle kisses. “You still seem stressed. Am I losing my touch? Thought I would’ve fucked that out of you by now.”

“You did, for the most part,” you admit, eyes fluttering shut in post-orgasm bliss, before turning to face him. “And I enjoyed your efforts very much. It’s just...I’m sorry, I’m just a little distracted. Normally, I have another job lined up by now. And I mean - I’m fine. My savings are solid. I’d be fine. But with my Kinky Boots contract ending, I should be moving on. There should be something else coming up. And there isn’t.”

“It’ll work out,” Brendon soothes, running a hand through your hair and down your back. “Besides, maybe the universe just wants to see exactly what me spoiling you constantly would look like.” You grin feebly and press closer to him, relishing the feel of his hard cock pressed firmly against your stomach. “I think…” and he pauses for a moment, waiting for you to tip your head up to meet his eyes. “I think I’m gonna stick around for a bit. After my run ends, I mean. I like New York. I haven’t gotten to really explore the area because when I’m not in rehearsal or actually performing or doing press, I’m tangled up with my sweet girl here.” He nuzzles you affectionately. “And I have no intention of giving up my time with her. So, if I want to immerse myself in the city, it’s going to have to wait til my time with the show is over.”

Your breath is caught in your chest and you hardly dare ask the question, but this has been on your mind too and if he’s bringing it up… “you mean you’re staying?” You can hear the hope in your voice. He can too.

“For a while, yeah. I-” he hesitates, tracing a path down your hip. “I love you, Y/n.”

You’re pretty sure he can feel your heart racing. The room is spinning. There’s a ringing in your ears and you feel dizzy. “You love me?” You’re giddy, eyes wide, fingers numb with sheer euphoria, cheeks hurting from the size of your smile.

“I love you,” he confirms, reaching down to grab your waist and hoist you up higher. “Do you, uh...well, I mean. Do you...I was just wondering if you…”

“I love you too,” you whisper, tugging him in by the back of his head to kiss him firmly. “I love you too.” You’re running your fingertips along his jaw, pressing yourself to him, and he’s beaming at you.

“Fuck, that feels so good to say,” Brendon murmurs against your mouth, rolling you both over so he can press you down into his mattress and kiss you deeply. “And so good to hear.”

You tangle your legs around his waist and grind subtly, seeking him. “I love you,” you repeat, scratching at his back as he shifts to fill you. “You’re really staying?”

“I’m really staying, Y/n,” he tells you, groaning in pleasure as you rock your hips up to take him deeper and kiss his neck. “Yes, Princess, my sweet girl. My babydoll. I’m staying. Fuck, you’re always such a good girl for me - take my cock, honey- yes!”

His fingers clutch at you as your back arches, and you whine and beg him to mark you up. “No one will see,” you assure him breathlessly. With the time that’s passed since the show opened, he’s getting more attention and that means you are too. You’ve gotten accustomed to the hat and sunglasses routine and you enjoy tucking yourself into the crook of his arm as he and Zack usher you into wherever you’re all headed. He makes you feel safe. But with more attention comes the requirement of being more careful about leaving marks. A stray visible one could be bad, but you don’t care right now: you want it. You know he does too. He loves watching you strip and seeing all the marks he’s left on your body. “Baby, please. Need you to claim me.”

He groans into your neck, biting down and suckling eagerly, and you shriek, hitching a leg higher over his waist. “Yes, fuck yes,” you gasp. “I love you, Brendon.”

“I love you,” he manages, slightly breathless as he picks up the pace of thrusting into you. “I want my princess to come on my cock.” He slides two fingers into your mouth and you suck greedily. “Good girl,” he praises, and you whimper when he rolls a nipple in between his now-slick fingers. “You sound so pretty, doll. Gonna come for me?”

“Uh huh,” you whisper, tangling a hand in his hair and tugging his mouth down to yours. “Gonna come in me?”

“Fuck,” Brendon mumbles, nipping at your lower lip affectionately. “You know I will, Princess, if you’re still okay with that?”

It’s been two months since the accident in his dressing room, and in bed the next morning, you suggested that maybe, if the two of you were going to be exclusive, maybe the condoms weren’t essential. You were on good birth control anyway, you told him, and you felt like the two of you were good at commitment, so you were okay with forgoing the condoms if he meant it when he said exclusive. Before you had a chance to gauge his reaction, he was on top of you, kissing you fervently, thanking you and promising you that he was committed and you were the only one. One very romantic date to a clinic for testing and two good news phone calls later, and you’ve been able to feel him and only him every time since. He still checks every time though, and you love him for that. Plus, you just love hearing him say it. “You good with me coming in your perfect pussy?” He’s breathing hard as he slides in deep, fingers gripping your thighs as he tries to control himself and wait for permission.

“You know I’m okay with it. You know I love when you come in me.” You drop your legs from his waist and spread them wide, hooking your ankles over the edge of the bed. “Give it to me,” you beg, gasping when he bites down on your neck while thrusting hard and reaching down to rub your clit.

“You first, babydoll. You’ve gotta come for me first, Y/n, you know that.” He’s kissing you frantically, moaning every time your tongues brush, and you can feel your body tensing as he pushes you closer to the edge. “That’s it, Princess. Be a good girl. Be my sweet, messy girl and come all over my cock. Come on my cock.” His encouragement is exactly what you need.

“Ooooh shit!” Your squeal is paired with your nails raking down his back and he grunts, thrusting hard one final time before you feel him trembling over you, praising you and rocking into you through his climax. “Yes, Bren, yes!”

His stomach is tense from the rapid thrusts and there’s a sheen of sweat over his skin. His chest is flushed pink and his eyes are dark, and he’s mumbling something about how in love with you he is. He’s still shuddering over you when you reach for him, needing him closer. He drops down to his forearms and kisses you softly, wrapping you into an embrace. The kiss is sweet and serene, and you find yourself getting lost in it until you break the kiss to yawn. “My perfect girl,” he whispers, grinning at you and tugging the abandoned blankets back up over your bodies. “You sleepy, Princess?”

“Uh huh,” you whisper, snuggling closer. “Less stressed too.” You don’t need to say how much his imminent departure was weighing on you. He knows.

“Good,” Brendon murmurs, stroking a hand down your back and holding you close. “We’ll shower later. Love when you come that hard for me. Makes me fucking wild.”

You agree softly, wiggling against him and guiding his half-hard cock back into you. “Like feeling you in me while we sleep. Like when you have dirty dreams and get hard while you sleep. Love you.”

“I love you too,” Brendon says, kissing the top of your head. “I love you too.”

-||-

“So where will you live?” You’re washing your hair as Brendon leans against the wall of his shower, watching you. “Can you extend the lease on this place?” You look over at him, curiosity all over your face. You’re trying to focus on the conversation, but he really is astonishingly gorgeous, and he’s wet and naked and yours.

“Not sure…but Zack is looking into it. I’d rather stay here if I can, but I figure if I need a new place, I can go house-hunting. Apartment hunting?” He ponders this and you laugh, realizing that he’s probably got some sprawling property back in California. You’ve never lived anywhere other than apartments and brownstones, so a whole house with a yard and probably a pool is such a foreign concept.

“Apartment is most likely,” you tell him, whimpering with delight when he moves back under the water and kisses you softly. “Penthouse, maybe…if you’re feeling fancy,” you manage as his lips move down your neck and his hands curve over your ass.

“As long as I have a space to take you to bed, a space to make you breakfast, and a space to bathe with you after we’re done ravishing each other, I don’t care where I live.” He grins up at you through wet lashes. “I have my priorities straight.”

“Yeah you do,” you say affectionately, ruffling his wet hair. “Though I’d like you to stay here too...I know this area now. I even have a favorite bagel place around the corner.”

Brendon grins and turns the water off, wringing out your hair gently before passing you a towel. “And I’m sure wanting to stay here doesn’t have anything to do with that huge four-post bed to which I routinely tie you...before devouring your pussy until we need to change the sheets.” He winks and you blush, protesting that the bed is a nice perk too but the location of this brownstone is great. He laughs. “We’ll know I’m becoming a New Yorker when I base my living situation on a favorite bagel place,” he teases. “For now, I’ll just let my brilliant, sexy girlfriend pick where we go. She’s never steered me wrong.”

“I don’t know how you can eat them from just anywhere. Murray’s has the best salt bagels, and you never need to go anywhere else.” You cross your arms as if the point is decided and Brendon kisses your forehead.

“You’re right. Murray’s or nothing.” He pauses as you both dry off. “But what if I told you I sent Zack out for breakfast and he didn’t go there?”

You frown at him as you wiggle into a pair of leggings and tug one of his shirts over your head. “I’d say you owe me another weekend at the Plaza with lots of oral and then maybe I can find a way to forgive the transgression,” you tease, shrieking with laughter when he scoops you up into his arms and carries you back to the bed.

“He went to Murray’s, don’t worry. I specified.” He winks at you. “And I already booked our room for next weekend.” He places you down on the bed and flops next to you. “What’s more, I can assure you there will be plenty of me eating you out. I’m already dreaming about you in that bed, hips tipped up so I can grab your ass and really make you come on my tongue. I know we just showered, but damn, I want to get you naked and sitting on my face again, riding my tongue. You’re intoxicating.” He kisses your cheek and you wrap your arms around him, snuggling in close.

“You’re a unicorn,” you tell him. “No one else has ever gone down on me half as good or half as often. My unicorn.”

He beams at you, the love clear on his face. “And I’m planning on keeping it that way. You’re my girl. My babydoll. My princess. Mine. I want you to feel as incredible as you can. Plus, I just really love the feeling of your pussy on my face.” He grins when you blush and rolls over on top of you, sliding down your body and tugging your leggings down. “Can’t get enough of you,” he groans, licking gently.

“Oh fuck,” you sigh, spreading your legs wider for him. “Yeah, baby, just like that. Just - yes...uh huh, fuck yes!”

Brendon smiles and slides two fingers in deep, rocking them forward gently while he fastens his lips around your clit and frets his tongue against you. The squeal you let out is piercing and he presses more insistently with his fingers, all the while telling you not to come yet. He knows you could, but he wants you to be good and wait.

“What?” You sound frantic and in disbelief, but he laughs, telling you that he’ll make you come soon. “Yeah you will,” you pant, moaning and wiggling against his face. “Wanna come on your tongue.”

He groans his approval and squeezes your ass with one hand, thrusting hard with the fingers of his other one. “Wanna eat your cunt for every meal; just want to make this last. Can’t get enough of your sweetness on my face,” he says in a ragged voice, clearly grinding down into the mattress. “Babydoll, my love - let me have you. Need you to rub your sweet cunt on my face and come for me.” His tongue goes back to your clit.

“I’m allowed to come?” You’re breathless, clutching at his hair with both hands and frantically grinding your pussy against his eager mouth and rolling tongue. He nods and you gasp your gratitude as your eyes roll back and your thighs tighten around his head.

He grips your thighs hard and shudders in pleasure, lapping at you needily. The security alarm chimes and he pulls back, hair wild, eyes dark, and swollen lips smeared with you. “Breakfast is here.”

-||-

The episode of Brooklyn99 has just ended and the next one is queued up, which means It’s his turn to lay with his head in your lap. You lift your head up off of his thighs and flip yourself around so he can assume the position you’ve just abandoned. “What will you do when you’re done with the show?” You pose the question as you run your fingers through his hair.

“Get another bagel and then go down on my girlfriend again.” He says this casually and snuggles closer to you, rubbing his head back against your hand.

“What?” You pause, and then laugh. “No, B. I meant after Kinky Boots. Not this episode...although I’m not opposed.”

“Ohhhh, after my show.” He laughs now too, and considers for a moment. “Well, there’s going to be lazy morning sex with you, obviously. Breakfast in bed. Leisurely walks through the city. Lunch and dinner wherever you want. Maybe see some other shows. Literally anything you want. A whole week at the Plaza. A cabin upstate with a case of your favorite wine and no clothes. Whatever you want. Gonna spoil my Princess. Gonna be your boyfriend and your sugar daddy.” He’s got his eyes closed in pleasure as you scratch his scalp, but you can hear the teasing note in his voice. “We’ll do whatever you want.”

“What if I get a new contract? And I’m at work all the time?” You can’t help but sound nervous, but he smirks.

“Then I’ll be your slutty fucktoy and spend all my time in your bed so you can have me whenever you want. I’ll just be naked and ready for you. I’ll make breakfast in the morning and fill up your travel mug with the coffee you like. Send you off to work with one long kiss goodbye. Then I’ll clean the apartment and amuse myself for a while. Get dinner ordered for delivery before getting back in bed. Or maybe I’ll drape myself fetchingly on the couch so I’m the first thing you see when you get in the door.” Brendon’s grinning up at you and you have to laugh because he’s so ridiculous and so cute and so ridiculously cute. “You love me,” he says, half-teasing and half-awestruck. “You’re the best woman I’ve ever known and you love me.”

“I do love you,” you tell him, resting a hand on his stomach and stroking idly as you play with his hair. “I love you so much.”

“I’ll never get tired of hearing that. Your turn again,” Brendon says as he wiggles out of your lap and sits up. “Lay down, Princess. Wanna get my hands on you. If you keep touching me, I’m gonna get distracted and needy. So we gotta switch early.”

“I can make this sacrifice,” you say with a faux-long suffering tone. “I suppose I can tolerate your hands on me.” You wink at him and instead of laying your head in his lap, you tug him down so you’re both stretched across the couch, chest to chest with your back to the back of the couch. “Sleepy,” you admit, snuggling closer to him. “Can’t focus on this episode.”

Without hesitation, Brendon grabs his phone and pauses the stream. “Then we’ll nap, my sleepy love.” He presses a soft kiss to your forehead and you wrap your arms around him. “You cold? You want blankets?” When you nod, he reaches up behind you and tugs a knit blanket down over you both. “Rest, Y/n. I’m not going anywhere.”

-||-

“So,” Brendon begins as he hauls you back into bed after lunch, “where did we land on the sugar daddy thing?” He’s got one eyebrow raised in curiosity and he’s watching you in amusement. You narrow your eyes at him playfully, tugging his hair idly and snuggling into him.

“Depends entirely on why you’re asking,” you tell him with a grin. “I’m not going to stop working to be your slutty fucktoy, to use your phrasing.” You bite lightly at his neck and he groans, reaching down to grope your ass and bring you even closer.

“Just curious. You definitely don’t need to stop working. You’re damn good at your job and you love it. I wouldn’t ask you to do that. Ever.” He’s playing with your fingers now and nuzzling your cheek. “I just keep seeing things I think you would like or places I want to take you but I don’t want you to feel...I don’t know. Like I’m - I don’t know. Trying to make you feel...”

“Hey, I fuck you because I’m super turned on by you and I love you. Not because you pay for things and I feel obligated,” you point out, giggling when you see the look on his face. “Dork. Buy me whatever and take me wherever. Or don’t. I’m still going to want to suck your cock.” Brendon groans happily and you laugh, sliding a hand down into his sweatpants. “You don’t need to worry about me feeling weird. Just keep being you. You’re who I want and need. Sure, you’re a celebrity and a rock star who makes bank but I’m not here for that guy. I’m here for the sweet, sexy, sensitive guy who is my boyfriend. I like the nice dinners we do and our mini-vacations to the Plaza. But I don’t need them. All I need is you. And your world-class dick.” You squeeze lightly and he sighs in pleasure, watching you with dark eyes.

“I love you,” he says a little helplessly, hips twitching as you stroke him idly. You whisper it back to him and he reaches down to wrap his hand around yours. “Don’t tease me, baby. Just a little faster- yes, Y/n, just like that.” Together, you pick up your pace and he buries his face in your neck. “God, you make even a handjob feel so good. Stroke it, Princess; yeah, you feel that hard cock? That’s for you. I’m going to come for you.”

“I wanna lick it,” you tell him, squeezing again as he grunts in pleasure. He shakes his head, kissing down to your collarbone.

“No, baby, you’re sleepy. Love that you want it, but you’re tired right now. Just get me off like this. Play with my cock and make me come like this. You can suck me off later. Guarantee I’ll want it later too. Oh fuck- baby, that’s so good…” He tosses his head back and rocks into your grip eagerly.

“Come on my hand,” you murmur, speeding up. “Come on my hand and let me lick your cum off my fingers.” It sends a thrill right to your clit when he lets out a shuddering gasp, stiffens, and you feel him give in. “Yes,” you whisper, praising him and leaning in to kiss him sweetly as his hips twitch and he trembles. “Love that.”

Brendon laughs shakily, running his free hand through his hair and then pressing against the small of your back so you’re flush against him. “Obviously I love it too,” he says and his lips part silently when you slide your hand out of his sweatpants and delicately place two fingers in your mouth. “Yeah, you look good like that,” he mumbles, snuggling against you. “Got me sleepy now too.”

You finish sucking your fingers clean and run a hand down his arm. “Then let’s sleep.” You shift a little so he can roll onto his back and you can rest your head on his chest. “Don’t be surprised if you wake up with your dick in my mouth. I want you,” you tell him, running your clean hand through his hair tenderly.

-||-

It’s been three days since he told you he was staying, and you’re watching curtain call from the wings, going out of your mind with lust, when you notice the missing button from his jacket. That’s the perfect excuse, if anyone asks.

When he comes off-stage, you grab him by the wrist and lead him back to his dressing room, ignoring the lighthearted comments and amused remarks from the rest of the cast. They know about the two of you, and you’ve worked with many of them before. They’re just glad you finally chose a good guy.

“What’s up, babydoll?” Brendon kisses you gently once you’ve closed the door. “You good?” He raises an eyebrow and you nod, removing his jacket and shirt carefully before guiding his hand up your skirt. “Ah, I’m caught up now.” He kisses you more fervently while his fingers tease you. “Someone is feeling needy. It’s interesting how careful you’re being with the costume pieces. Normally when you’re this wet, you’re clawing at my clothes to get me naked,” Brendon says, curling his fingers and making you gasp and cling to him.

“Only because I’d be the one to repair them before the show tomorrow night,” you remind him breathlessly, kneeling and tugging down his costume-boxers and folding them neatly before turning your attention to the compression shorts and dance belt. “And if I rushed and damaged anything, I’d be distracted the entire time you’re trying to make me come. Plus,” you say, looking up at Brendon with an amused smile, “this is a tease for both of us.”

He’s leaning against the wall, watching you with heavy eyes and biting his lower lip. “Definitely a tease,” he agrees, reaching down to stroke your hair. “Need you, Princess. Need you now.” He gestures down at the compression shorts that are really trying to do their job of concealing his arousal. You whimper and caress his cock through the material, looking up at him with wide eyes.

“Wanna suck your dick so badly but also I need you in me…” you can both hear the conflict in your voice. “Miss feeling your big thick cock filling me up when you fuck me hard.” You feel how wet you are and you look at him desperately. “Can I suck on your cock til you’re close and then take you inside me?”

Brendon’s head hits the back of the door and he groans in ecstasy. “Abso-fucking-lutely.” He promises, moving to sit down on the couch so he can work on one boot while you get the other one off. “Miss your mouth so much. Been thinking about how good you suck me off, how you swallow my cock down and still scratch for me to fuck your mouth...god, Y/n, you make my cock so hard.”

You don’t even need to respond; you just shift so you’re between his knees and rise up so you can take him down in one slick slide of your mouth.

“Holy fucking shit,” Brendon mutters, clutching your hair and trying to keep his hips still. You moan around him, rubbing frantically at your clit through your panties. “Don’t come, baby,” he orders you. “Want you to come on my cock. Wanna come in you and watch your face when I give you all my cum.” He’s panting, gripping the edge of the couch as your head bobs, your tongue working hard.

“That’s it, Princess. Just like that - oh fuck, just like that, suck just like-“ Brendon cuts himself off with a long groan that you’re positive is echoing down the hall. You don’t care. You’ve got one hand wrapped around the base of his cock, squeezing gently as you lick your way back up to the tip. “Holy fuck I love you so much,” he declares when you tease your way down to his balls.

You’ll never get tired of how he tastes. His cock is in your mouth and hands are in your hair; you’re surrounded by him and you know your panties are soaked. He’s watching in awe as you trace lines up his cock with the tip of your tongue, just to take him in your mouth entirely with an eager moan. You slide your panties to the side and roll your hips forward to take two fingers in you. His fingers feel better but yours will have to do, since he’s breathing hard and trying not to fuck your mouth.

Once his gasps, groans, and swears are slurring together into one stream of pleasure, you pull back and wipe at your mouth, your lips swollen and slick, with the back of your hand. “Bend me over the counter and fuck me til I can’t see straight.” With that, you tug your shirt off over your head and shove your skirt down. “Please,” you add, laughing as you bend yourself over the counter and watch him in the mirror.

“Yup, that’s - yes, gonna do that,” he agrees, standing from the couch and crossing the room to grab you by the waist and push into you. “Damn, you’re so fucking tight like this,” he tells you, watching you in the mirror. You whimper in pleasure and stretch your arms out in front of you as you realize there’s nothing to hold onto.

“I’ve got you, babydoll,” and he reassures you by squeezing your hips. He’s curled his fingers around your hips and is keeping you pulled back so his rapid thrusts won’t drive you into the edge of the counter. “Won’t let you get hurt.”

His whole body is tense as he thrusts into you from behind; you’re desperately trying to keep your head lifted to watch in the mirror. All the teasing of your clit has you right on the edge too, and you’re sure you’re going to pass out from sheer pleasure before he’s done with you. The sensation of being filled by him, over and over again, is heaven. The firm heat of his body pressed to yours makes your whole body ache with desire. You lose all sense of time - there’s only his cock filling you and his mouth whispering filth and his hands clutching you. You drop your head, pressing your forehead to the cool surface of the counter. “Don’t look away,” Brendon says in a low voice. “Watch how good we are in the mirror. Eyes on me, Princess. Watch me fuck you. Watch me take you. Watch me make you come.”

“Oh god,” you whine, forcing yourself to open your eyes and meet his gaze in the mirror. “It’s too hot, you’re too hot,” you whimper, pushing back on him. “Seeing us, seeing you fuck me like this, it’s too good. It makes me crazy. You’re gonna make me come. Fuck, I’m gonna come!” He can see the raw desire written on your face and he reaches down to rub at your clit.

“Then come for me,” Brendon tells you, still watching your reflection. “Be a good girl and come on my cock.” He hasn’t even finished the sentence before you’re crying out in ecstasy, the waves of your climax crashing over you. He fucks you through it, holding you in place as you shake and he pushes harder, doubling the tremors taking over your body. “Gonna come in you, yeah? You gonna watch me come in you?” You watch his head dip low to whisper the questions in your ear.

“Yeah,” is all you manage. You moan low in the back of your throat while he chants your name, still rocking into you steadily, even if his rhythm is abandoned.

“That’s my good girl. That’s my Princess,” Brendon murmurs, his thrusts slowing as his orgasm subsides. “Fuck, I love you so much. You are so good. You are so good. Come here, Y/n.” He takes a step back, guiding you to the couch where he flops unceremoniously. You curl up against him, still trembling with the intensity of your orgasm. “You okay?” He’s stroking your back and you nod, lifting your head to meet his eyes.

“I’m fucking fantastic,” you say a little breathlessly, laughing. “That was intense. I loved it. I love you.” He murmurs it back and wraps his arms around you, pulling you closer and rolling you both back deeper into the couch. “I’m exhausted. But I feel fantastic.”

“You look fantastic,” Brendon says, his eyes shining, as he shifts so you can press yourself against him and nestle your head under his chin. He’s running two fingers over your thigh. “You feel fantastic. You are fantastic.”

“You’re pretty fantastic yourself,” you counter, kissing his jawline. “What do you say we take our mutually fantastic selves home and take a shower? Then get some food in you?”

“Oh hell yeah,” Brendon says, wiggling up off the couch to grab his street clothes. “Gonna order now so it’s waiting for us when we get home.”

-||-

There are three bags sitting in the entryway of the flower shop when Zack parks the car, and Brendon scoops you up so that you’re clinging to him, shrieking and trying to not fall. “That’s dinner. Oh - no, I gotcha, babydoll,” he murmurs, and he shifts you slightly so you can wrap your legs around his waist and grip his shoulders. His hand slides under your skirt to grip your ass and you sigh happily, hooking your ankles together. “You’re not going anywhere.” He winks at you as he bends down to grab all three bags.

“Three? How much did you order?” You tease, playing with the hair at the back of his neck. He laughs and shakes his head, telling you it’s not all food. “Then what is it?” You’re curious now, and he shrugs.

“Guess you’ll just have to be patient and see,” he murmurs with a small smile, laughing when you huff and remind him that you’re not patient. “Oh, I know.” He grips you tighter and thanks Zack as he opens the door and proceeds to help you both up the stairs.

You’re finally inside and alone with him when he motions for you to follow him to the bathroom, still carrying the three bags with him. “This is not where normal people eat dinner,” you inform him, completely perplexed as to what his plan is.

“We’re not normal, Princess.” Brendon places the bags on the ground and bends over to plug the tub. “We’ve never been normal.” He yelps playfully when you smack his ass and he narrows his eyes at you. “I’m gonna get you back for that,” he warns, grinning when you retort that you’re sort of counting on that. He’s got the water running when he asks you for the smallest of the bags. You pass it to him without hesitation and he immediately unpacks three small kraft paper envelopes and dumps all of their contents into the hot water.

“Bath bombs?” You look at him, confused.

“Bath bombs,” he confirms, and he reaches for you to come stand beside him and watch the bombs swirl and burst and expand. “Three sex bombs from LUSH.”

“Ooooh,” you purr, stroking his chest now, pressing closer. “I like where this is going.” The smell of ylang-ylang and Jasmine is filling the bathroom and you are interested in getting him naked and in that water.

“So here’s my plan,” Brendon tells you, turning to face you. “I’m going to strip you out of those clothes and get you into this hot water.” You grin, because you’re on the same wavelength. He continues. “Once you’re settled, I’ll join you with the contents of these last two bags.” You raise an eyebrow and he presses a soft kiss to your forehead before starting on your clothes. “Now get your glorious, sexy, naked butt into that tub,” Brendon orders, giving you the faux-stern look that you love. You sink into the petal-pink, sudsy water with a sigh and he smiles. “Good girl.”

As you relax into the water, he rummages in the second bag, withdraws a bottle of red wine, and places it on the edge of the tub. “And finally,” he says with a flourish, “our dinner.” You peer over the edge of the deep tub and look at him with an amused expression, the corners of your lips curling and eyes sparkling as he tugs off his shirt.

“Baby, that’s four slices of cheesecake.”

“I know,” Brendon says, starting on his belt. “We’re having cheesecake and red wine in the bath. This is dinner. We’re adults. We can eat cheesecake in the bath for dinner if we want.” He grins and kicks off his pants, and you watch with interest as he sheds his underwear. He winks at you when you see him half-hard, and you whimper under your breath, gripping the edge of the tub.

“You didn’t bring glasses,” you point out, gesturing toward the wine. He grins as he slides into the water behind you, sighing in pleasure when you wiggle back against him.

“We’re drinking right from the bottle,” Brendon murmurs against your neck. “I’m gonna get you wine-drunk and nice and relaxed and then I’m going to take you to bed.”

“And fuck me slowly?” You sound hopeful, and he bites down gently. “Right?”

“Depends on how wine-drunk you are.” His fingers curve over your breasts and he teases your nipples, groaning when you rub back against his cock. “Don’t wanna take advantage of you. Really just intended to cuddle you up in bed and share some soft kisses, maybe give you a massage.” You whimper and tell him that you want him though, even though you just had him in the dressing room. His fingers slip lower over your stomach and down between your thighs. “Needy Princess. Love that. Might just need to fuck you slowly before the wine, then, huh?”

You’re squirming against his fingers, rolling your hips and nodding eagerly as he nuzzles your ear, nibbling gently.

“Oh,” he says softly. “I forgot something.” He abandons your clit and stretches over the edge of the tub, reaching for the bag the cheesecake came in. “Got it.” He pulls his hand back and he shows you the small tube of silicone lubricant.

“Fuck,” you whisper, grabbing his other hand and shoving it between your thighs so he can feel how wet you are. “You thought of everything.”

“Well, mostly I just fantasized about fucking you against the shower wall tomorrow morning,” Brendon quips, grinning when you laugh. “And I tried to figure out what I needed to make that happen.” You gesture at the cheesecake and wine, telling him that he didn’t need to get all of this.

“No,” he agrees. “That was just because I wanted to eat cheesecake and get drunk with you in the bath. Completely separate from the fantasy morning sex.” He unscrews the top of the tube and you both watch as the clear gel drizzles down over his fingers. “I think we both are willing to wait on the cheesecake and wine?”

“Uh, yeah,” you agree, spreading your legs eagerly. “There’s not much I’m willing to put in front of red wine and cheesecake, but your fingers, and hopefully your cock, definitely make the list.”

Brendon laughs and kisses your cheek as his fingers go deep. You throw your head back and moan his name, already rocking forward for more. “My fingers, and hopefully my cock, thank you.”

#brendon urie #brendon urie smut #my work #brendon urie imagine #brendon x reader #fanfic #he could fuck me any way he wanted #imagine #brendon urie fic #brendon urie is my whole kink

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derieri · 5 years

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Masterpost of ADHD Coping Things I Learned to Do In College

Both as a resource for other people and a reminder to myself of habits to pick back up as I’m going into a Ph.D. program this fall.

This can all help cheat the executive function and focus challenges that trip up ADHD people in school and at work.

Here’s the short list of tips. They’re all explained and elaborated on after the cut!

Manage energy, not time

Treat motivation like inertia

Diversify productivity time

Use baby stimuli while studying

Learn the brain’s quirks

Maintain yourself and your environment

Keep tasks small

Exploit impulsivity

Don’t memorize, use

- Manage energy, not time. The ADHD brain is really hard to drag through school because it refuses to focus on anything it doesn’t find interesting. Every time you’re in a productive mood, choose to work on your least favorite class or assignment for as long as you possibly can. One of two things will happen: on a good day, your brain gets the message and will behave or sometimes even hyperfocus on this onerous work. Alternatively, you’ll lose all motivation and focus after a while---but you will still have gotten work done. This is a great strategy to boost work efficiency because forcing yourself to study for 4 hours is pointless if you only function for 2.

- Treat motivation like inertia. Objects in motion stay in motion. Objects at rest stay at rest. The transition from rest to motion (productivity) is really hard for ADHD brain, so don’t make yourself do it more than you must. When you need a break from homework or studying, don’t just chill out on the internet. Switch to another topic or class that uses a different skill set, take a shower, go for a walk, or do a chore. Stay in motion!

- Diversify productivity time. ADHD people, in general, struggle to sit and study for hours on end. So don’t. Intersperse chunks of study time (determined by natural energy and motivation levels, as in point 2) with other subjects or activities. Work on another assignment or subject, put your laundry in or go for a walk, or move locations or use a new background stimulus. The variation will help you focus.

- Use baby stimuli while studying. Through trial and error, identify small stimuli you can use while you’re studying to hush that mega-bored corner of your brain without distracting yourself. Lots of people use fidgets. I had success with a favorite texture (wrapping my security blanket around my shoulders) and strong tastes (calamata olives one at a time).

- Learn the brain’s quirks. Learn what makes you feel good and what helps you focus and do a lot of it. Sometimes this will be weird, like your hairstyle or the position you sit in. It’s still super important to sort out what works. I recommend paying attention to foods, hygiene, and the organization & orderliness of your room.

Weird shit that affected me: which wall my desk faced in the same corner, the ability of my desk chair to roll, how I sat, the amount of ambient noise (changed depending on the day), typing single vs. 1.5 vs. double-spaced, which font I used, how greasy my hair was, whether I had chapstick on, whether I had glasses or contacts on, and which kind of pants I was wearing.

- Maintain yourself and your environment. Self-care is important for everyone, but it’s vital for people with ADHD. To be at all functional, our brain needs to be in tip-top shape. Keep your room clean, eat well, exercise and go outside, sleep, and maintain your hygiene. This all sounds like a lot, but if you use these productive tasks as study breaks (see inertia and diversity) it can all get done.

- Keep tasks small. ADHD brain is easily overwhelmed by big tasks to the point of shutting down. Let them stay small. Break tasks down in your planner, then break them down further and only work on one piece at a time. Ask yourself: “what can I do in the next 5 minutes that will contribute to x” and do something, even if it’s technically out of order.

Note on room cleaning/environment: Once and a while you’ll manage the herculean task of actually cleaning your room up all the way. After that, or even while it’s still a mess, do yourself a favor and tidy up every night before bed. It’s small enough a task for your brain to not be daunted by it, it keeps the mess under control, and since it’s physical, it’s a good wind-down stimulus so shutting your brain off for sleep isn’t so hard.

- Exploit impulsivity. A TED talk I watched said that when you have an urge to do something, you have ten seconds to act on it. After that, you just won’t do it. This is extra true for ADHD. With ADHD we’re so used to suppressing impulses, but you can use them to help yourself too! If you have an impulse to do something productive, even if it’s not an essential task, let that impulse move you to act. This is similar to working with energy instead of time. Got an impulse to wash dishes? Random desire to go for a run? Sudden inspiration for that one essay? Do it.

- Don’t memorize, use. Short-term and working memory is garbage for people with ADHD. Our brains just don’t hold on to things the way they’re supposed to. Instead of writing your notes down and hoping that your brain retains it, use your notes as a proving ground for new information as you’re acquiring it. Rephrase the bullet point. Draw a diagram instead of writing numbers. Make a flow chart to connect ideas or a timeline. Scribble questions and counter-points in the margins. This carves those mental pathways---those memory pathways---much deeper than normal note-taking does. Then, review your notes by trying to teach them to someone else (stuffed animals and imaginary friends work too).

General Specifics (just trust me on these) - Make your bed in the morning. - Clear off your desk and the walls around it. - Maintain a planner or checklist. - Don’t let yourself doodle in your planner or use it for anything else, ever. - Plug your phone in away from your bed. - Use drinking water / a water bottle to stim. Stimulus helps Brain, hydration helps Brain, and frequent study breaks to go pee help Brain too. - Brainstorm and outline for essays with old-fashioned pen and paper.

The big summary of it all is this: Work with your brain, not against it.

Basically, learn and remember how your brain works, what things it does and does not like to do. Instead of trying to function on the same rhythms, patterns, and schedules that neurotypical people do, devise methods of working with your brain’s quirks to get things done.

#adhd #add #adhd tips #study tips #my stuff #not nnt

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newstfionline · 3 years

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Wednesday, August 11, 2021

Beating The Heat Is Out Of Reach (IPCC, AP News) The U.N.’s Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change (IPCC) published a shocker of a report Monday summarizing the latest authoritative scientific information about global warming. 234 scientists contributed to the 3,000-plus-page report. Global temperatures have already risen by 2 degrees Fahrenheit (1.1 degrees Celsius) since the 19th century, the highest in over 100,000 years. Further warming is already “locked in,” meaning even if emissions are drastically cut, some changes will be “irreversible” for centuries. Ice melt and sea-level rise are already accelerating, and wild weather events like heatwaves and storms are expected to worsen and become more frequent. Earth is warming so fast that by the 2030s, temperatures will probably exceed the Paris climate accord’s ideal goal of no more than 2.7 degrees Fahrenheit and 1.5 degrees Celsius by the year 2100. The report called it a “code red for humanity.”

Infrastructure bill approved in Senate (AP) With a robust vote after weeks of fits and starts, the Senate approved a $1 trillion infrastructure plan for states coast to coast on Tuesday, as a rare coalition of Democrats and Republicans joined together to overcome skeptics and deliver a cornerstone of President Joe Biden’s agenda. “Today, we proved that democracy can still work,” Biden declared at the White House, noting that the 69-30 vote included even Senate Republican leader Mitch McConnell. The overwhelming tally provided fresh momentum for the first phase of Biden’s “Build Back Better” priorities, now heading to the House. A sizable number of lawmakers showed they were willing to set aside partisan pressures, at least for a moment, eager to send billions to their states for rebuilding roads, broadband internet, water pipes and the public works systems that underpin much of American life. The measure proposes nearly $550 billion in new spending over five years in addition to current federal authorizations for public works that will reach virtually every corner of the country. There’s money to rebuild roads and bridges, and also to shore up coastlines against climate change, protect public utility systems from cyberattacks and modernize the electric grid. Public transit gets a boost, as do airports and freight rail. Most lead drinking water pipes in America could be replaced.

COVID vaccines to be required for military under new US plan (AP) Members of the U.S. military will be required to get the COVID-19 vaccine beginning next month under a plan laid out by the Pentagon Monday and endorsed by President Joe Biden. In memos distributed to all troops, top Pentagon leaders said the vaccine is a necessary step to maintain military readiness. Defense Secretary Lloyd Austin said the mid-September deadline could be accelerated if the vaccine receives final FDA approval or infection rates continue to rise. “I will seek the president’s approval to make the vaccines mandatory no later than mid-September, or immediately upon” licensure by the Food and Drug Administration “whichever comes first,” Austin said in his memo, warning them to prepare for the requirement.

For first time, average pay for supermarket and restaurant workers tops $15 an hour (Washington Post) The U.S. labor market hit a new milestone recently: For the first time, average pay in restaurants and supermarkets climbed above $15 an hour. Wages have been rising rapidly as the economy reopens and businesses struggle to hire enough workers. Some of the biggest gains have gone to workers in some of the lowest-paying industries. Overall, nearly 80 percent of U.S. workers now earn at least $15 an hour, up from 60 percent in 2014. Job sites and recruiting firms say many job seekers won’t even consider jobs that pay less than $15 anymore. For years, low-paid workers fought to make at least that much. Now it has effectively become the new baseline. Economists caution that a higher average wage is not the same as a $15 minimum wage. Half of workers in these industries are still making below $15 an hour. Nonetheless, rising pay is still a game-changer for millions of workers.

Dry California tourist town to guests: ‘Please conserve’ (AP) Tourists flock by the thousands to the coastal town of Mendocino for its Victorian homes and cliff trails, but visitors this summer are also finding public portable toilets and signs on picket fences pleading: “Severe Drought. Please conserve water.” Hotels have closed their lobby bathrooms and residents have stopped watering their gardens in the foggy outpost about 150 miles (240 kilometers) north of San Francisco after two years of little rain sapped many of the wells Mendocino depends on for potable water. Mendocino’s water woes were compounded in recent weeks when the city of Fort Bragg a few miles to the north—its main backup water supplier—informed officials that it, too, had a significant drop in its drinking water reserves after the Noyo River recorded its lowest flows in decades. “This is a real emergency,” said Ryan Rhoades, superintendent of the Mendocino City Community Services District, which helps manage the water in the town’s aquifer.

Nicaragua recalls four LatAm ambassadors in tit-for-tat move (Reuters) Nicaragua has recalled its ambassadors to Mexico, Argentina, Colombia and Costa Rica for “consultations,” the government said on Monday, deepening the Central American country’s international isolation over its crackdowns on the opposition. Mexico, Argentina and Colombia recently recalled their ambassadors to protest against moves to clamp down on the opposition in Nicaragua, while Costa Rica a few weeks ago suspended the appointment of its ambassador to the country. On Saturday, U.S. Secretary of State Antony Blinken accused Ortega of taking new “undemocratic, authoritarian actions.” Blinken also singled out Ortega’s wife, Nicaraguan Vice President Rosario Murillo, and said the two were seeking to hold on to power “at all costs” with a strategy of disqualifying potential opposition candidates. Nicaragua is due to hold presidential elections in November in which Ortega is seeking a fourth consecutive term.

Twelve Days In Office, and Crisis Swamps Peru’s Leftist President (Bloomberg) Peru’s new president is off to a rocky start, selecting contentious ministers, alienating allies and setting the stage for a brutal face-off with congress, all within days of taking office. A rural teacher and union activist, Pedro Castillo won the election after reassurances that he’s his own man, not beholden to his party’s Marxist ideology or chief. But when he named his cabinet—including a prime minister who’s under investigation for being an alleged apologist for terrorists—analysts, opposition figures and even some who’d backed him expressed alarm, so much so that the word “impeachment” was heard more than once. “His political capital went up in smoke in 24 hours,” said Rodolfo Rojas, a partner of the Lima-based Sequoia political advisory group. “If he doesn’t change course, there’s no future for him.” Impeachment isn’t imminent, Rojas said, but a clash with congress looks likely. And while Peru has made a habit of ousting presidents, it’s rare for such a discussion to take place within days of inauguration.

French wine production set for a 30-percent drop (Washington Post) A confluence of weather woes is hurting France’s wine harvest. First, there was severe frost in the spring, which laid the foundation for disaster by damaging 30 percent of the production. Then, torrential summer rains hit western Europe in July, leaving parts of Germany and Belgium ravaged by floods, and leading to fungal attacks on grapes and their leaves in France. All of this has set France up for a wine supply drop of 24 to 30 percent this year—the lowest output since 1970, France’s farm ministry said Friday. For champagne, harvest potential has been slashed in half, some producers warned. In Italy, the world’s largest wine producer, high temperatures in the south caused an early harvest, while heavy rains in the north caused a late harvest, according to farmers association Coldiretti. Output is estimated to fall by 5 to 10 percent.

'We fought a great battle': Greece defends wildfire response (AP) As Greece’s massive wildfires were being largely tamed Tuesday, the country’s civil protection chief defended the firefighting efforts, saying every resource was thrown into the battle against what he described as the fire service’s biggest-ever challenge. Nikos Hardalias said authorities “truly did what was humanly possible” against blazes that destroyed tens of thousands of hectares (acres) of forest and hundreds of homes, killed a volunteer firefighter and forced more than 60,000 people to flee. Two other firefighters were in intensive care with severe burns. “We handled an operationally unique situation, with 586 fires in eight days during the worst weather conditions we’ve seen in 40 years,” Hardalias told a news conference. “Never was there such a combination of adverse factors in the history of the fire service.” Greece had just experienced its worst heat wave since 1987, which left its forests tinder-dry. Other nearby nations such as Turkey and Italy also faced the same searing temperatures and quickly spreading fires.

Smoke from Siberia wildfires reaches north pole in historic first (Guardian) Smoke from raging forest fires in Siberia has reached the north pole for the first time in recorded history, as a Russian monitoring institute warned the blazes were worsening. Devastating wildfires have ripped across Siberia with increasing regularity over the past few years, which Russia’s weather officials and environmentalists have linked to climate change and an underfunded forest service. One of Siberia’s hardest-hit regions this year has been Yakutia – Russia’s largest and coldest region that sits atop permafrost – which has had record high temperatures and drought. On Saturday, the US space agency Nasa said its satellite images showed wildfire smoke travelling “more than 3,000km (1,800 miles) from Yakutia to reach the north pole”, calling it “a first in recorded history”. It added that on 6 August most of Russia was covered in smoke. According to Russia’s forestry agency, this year’s fires have ravaged more than 14m hectares, making it the second-worst fire season since the turn of the century.

Lockdowns In Manila (Guardian) The more aggressive Delta variant of COVID-19 has led to record case numbers in countries across Southeast Asia. Indonesia, Thailand, Malaysia, and Vietnam have reported record cases in recent weeks. The variant was detected in the Philippines in mid-July and has spread to 13 of 17 regions. On Friday, the national capital region of Manila, with a population of almost 14 million, was placed under strict lockdown until August 20 in an attempt to slow the spread. Only authorized people, including those buying food, traveling for medical reasons, or frontline workers are allowed to go outside. The day before the lockdown went into effect, thousands rushed to vaccination centers and waited for hours hoping to get a shot. Rumors had spread that unvaccinated people wouldn’t be allowed to claim government aid or go outside.

Taliban Capture Sixth Provincial Capital (Foreign Policy) The Taliban’s advance across Afghanistan continued on Monday with the capture of Aibak, the capital of Samangan province, marking the sixth provincial capital to fall to the group in less than a week. Monday’s seizure was hastened by the defection of Asif Azimi—a prominent warlord with ties to the now defunct Northern Alliance—a worrying sign of shifting allegiances due to a rapidly changing situation on the ground. As the fighting drags on, pressure is building on President Ashraf Ghani to get a handle on the situation or get out of the way. Reports in Bloomberg and the Wall Street Journal paint a picture of an isolated leader whose best hope lies in rallying support from anti-Taliban groups ahead of an all-out civil war.

#headlines #news

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michtimadhura · 3 years

Text

MAJNU (Lover)

This is not my story. I’ve taken this plot from Ajeeb Dastaans on Netflix and tried to modify it

Heart pounding out of rhythm and hormones taking over her body, Lipakshi sat in her royal bedroom in her extravagant red wedding lehenga. Her nervous emotions were all over the place, exerted due to the wedding yet handling herself with grace, she waited for her husband. The door opened and Deepraj walked in, but his steps stopped all of a sudden. He stood at the entrance in his cream sherwani and sandpaper rough face, hesitant about her reaction yet quite firm about his decision. “ I’ve married you only because my father told me to…I am in love with someone else so I can’t love you and neither can I give you any children. Let us consider this marriage a sacrifice between 2 political parties for money and power.”, he stated this as loudly and bluntly as he could. But Lipakshi wasn’t just going to let go, gathering her most savage poker face, she said, “You men will always remain hypocrites…if you are going to cheat me in the very start of our marriage, well… then get ready to be cheated on”.

Deepraj walked out of the room leaving Lipakshi in a puddle of tears. She spent hours crying her eyes out until she couldn’t take it anymore. She had realized that this marriage was nothing but a deal between her MP father and a mafia boss. Her feelings were played by her father’s politics but she wasn’t among the ones who live a hopeless life lost in sadness when there’s no hope visible. Her decision was finally made, she was going to avenge everything that had happened to her. She did not care about life or death anymore and started seducing Deepraj’s mafia men. She started having affairs with them. Men who were genuinely loyal to Deepraj ignored Lipakshi’s behaviour and those who weren’t, started dating her or asking her for sex. But none of them lasted for more than 3 days because DING DONG, you can mess with demons but you cannot mess with Satan himself. Deepraj always caught them and like a true mafia boss he didn’t even flinch before taking their lives. As time passed, experimenting while killing his own men became his new hobby.

Months passed and so did years, Lipakshi’s grudge against her husband was not a news anymore. Everything was going on as usual until one fine day when “he” came. That one fine day was situated in the summers of May. Lipakshi was sitting on the huge swing in her front yard peeling a Mango while Deepraj sat miles away from her. Resting on his armchair with his feet slightly grazing the grass, he spoke to his driver, “Babloo, isn’t your son coming back today?” Babloo’s chest swelled with pride, “Haa sahabji, he is already here. He flew back from London yesterday. But he’ll soon be leaving for USA to start his new job…he’s gotten a job for 1.5 million dollars over there…” Deepraj cut Babloo off, “Uh…what was his name again?”

“His name’s Rajkumar, but Raj feels more modern na…so he’s switched to Raj nowadays”

“Acha?..a few years in a foreign country has changed him so adversely”

“It’s not the way you’re thinking……”

“Invite him over someday. Even I want to see how big he’s grown now.”, Deepraj cut Babloo off.

Out of nowhere, Lipakshi entered this small meeting, fed her husband a slice of mango and left without even bothering to start a conversation. She really was one hell of a savage.

“Ha Babloo, even I want to see your son”, said Ranjhesh, Deepraj’s right hand who was sitting right next to him to break the awkward silence after Lipakshi left.

“Jaroor sahabji…I’ll invite him over”

Half an hour later an army green coloured jeep entered the front yard. It stopped right near Lipakshi’s swing. A 6 feet figure got out from the jeep, “Raj beta!”, Babloo shouted from the other side of the front yard lawn. Raj adjusted his denim jacket over his shoulder and started walking towards his father only to glance at Lipakshi who caught his eye and winked at him. Raj got flustered for a moment but then regained his posture and resumed walking towards his father. “Namaste bhaiyya”, he said to Deepraj while touching his feet. “Welcome to our village Raj”, Deepraj said with a semi-smile while holding Raj by his arms. “Rajkumar is okay sahabji”, Babloo muttered. “Arey Nahi Babloo …he is a city man now, Rajkumar won’t suit him”.

Raj reached his pocket to take out a little transparent box. “Bhaiyya, I bought this Rolex for you”, he said as he handed that glistening box over to Deepraj, “Thank you bhaiyya, thanks a lot for everything that you’ve done for me and my family, especially when baba was in the hospital”

Ranjhesh found this suspicious “You know that Deepraj was the one who broke your father’s leg, right?”

“Yes, he did. But dad deserved it and Bhaiyya’s done so much more to help us that it outweighs everything. Also, I like to return people’s favours with even more fervour”, Raj said without any sign of hesitation.

“You’ll be waiting for dinner today, right Raj?”, Deepraj asked as if commanding him to stay for dinner.

“Sure, I’ll never refuse this honour”, Raj said.

“Hey Raj! This is Lipakshi, Deepraj’s wife”, Lipakshi said as she gave Raj a weirdly touchy hug. She wasn’t going to miss out on this guy, was she?

The atmosphere shifted 180 degrees to being extremely awkward and suffocating as Lipakshi kept staring at Raj who preferred to face the ground instead of facing Lipakshi.

“Namaste bhabhi”, he said looking down.

“Raj, why won’t you look at me?”, Lipakshi asked using her best baby voice.

“The right to look at you only belongs to Deepraj bhaiyya, bhabhi”, Raj replied trying to avoid eye contact.

Anger and the lust for revenge shot up in Lipakshi’s brown orbs as she locked eyes with her husband. “The only regret is that your bhaiyya doesn’t know the value of this right”, Lipakshi said as she reached Deepraj and gave him a little peck on the cheek which was meant to be more of a taunted slap.

Dinner was served hot and tasty that day. Deepraj, of course, sat at the centre of the dining table. Everything was going smoothly, dinner was midway over when Deepraj started talking, “So … Raj, I have an offer to make to you”, Deepraj sounded rather nervous, “ha bhaiyya, bolo na”, Raj said. “Well, I have a job offer for you, would you like to work right here for me, would you like to handle my business for me?”

“But bhaiyya… I already have gotten a job in the US… and I am leaving soon”

“Then tell them you won’t be joining. That job might be great, but I think you should think about staying here too. My business is quite huge right now and with you here to help me…who knows what we would accomplish.”

“But bhaiyya…”

“We all are a big family, right and what in this world is better than working with and helping your family. The company owns worth more than 500 million dollars of shares in the US market. Acha, I promise you a 4-million-dollar salary here. Now….don’t tell me that didn’t convince you”, Deepraj cut Raj off in a rather dominating manner.

Dollars flashed in Raj’s eyes. He took about 10 minutes to speak up and finally agreed with an “Okay bhaiyya”

Rest of the dinner progressed quietly.

Raj’s father was absolutely disappointed with his decision. “I worked hard to send you to the US just so you could come back here and join this slavery! Are you also going to serve those bastards for the rest of your life? Are you going to serve the same people who broke your baba’s leg? Do you even have any idea about what you’ve done?!”, he shouted at Raj as soon as he heard about Raj’s decision. “Baba, do you even know how much money 4 million is! It’s more than 100% of what the US people are offering me.”, Raj said his last words rather hastily as he left for the terrace. Raj’s bungalow had a clear view of Deepraj’s mansion.

He shared a cigarette with his local friend Badraa as they chatted about the village’s happenings.

“Rolex watch for that bastard and nothing for your yaar, ye kya Insaaf Hai bhai!”, Badraa pouted. “Choop baith, I don’t want to hear another lecture from you. The Rolex is fake, that man doesn’t even deserve a hit from my shoe. Also, what’s up with Deepraj’s wife?”, Raj asked. Even a dog is a king inside his own house, no matter how well he was fed at Deepraj’s mansion, he loathed him with every single nerve inside his body. “It’s been about 2 years and she’s not even pregnant. Now that tells you a lot about their marriage. Nahi toh, you know how fast Deep bhaiyya is”, more and more chuckles followed as they stared at the so-called “Deepraj mansion” under the starlit sky gossiping about the what-nots of the village.

Raj’s knowledge about stock exchange was remarkable and so was his willingness to work hard. He used to stay up late at Deepraj mansion to get his work done. Deepraj’s not-so-disciplined company had joined hands with the disciplined efforts of Raj, hence it did receive multiple rewards. In no time, the company started booming with money as Raj brought about 250 million worth of profit. Raj had now become Deepraj’s most trusted underdog, he was trusted even more than Deepraj’s own right hand Ranjhesh. As of Lipakshi, well, she had fallen head over heels for Raj and Lipakshi being Lipakshi never stopped her efforts. She used to flirt with Raj all the time and Raj being the most loyal underdog always ignored Lipakshi which was the most important factor fuelling the trust between Raj and Deepraj. He used to stare at Lipakshi when Deepraj wasn’t around but never did he ever manage to speak a word with her. He knew how big of a deal it was to flirt back with that lady until the day arrived when he mustered up the courage to do so.

One day, Deepraj was leaving for Lucknow for some work, “Raj, we need to attend some important business in Lucknow tomorrow. The Range Rover is already cleaned and washed, get ready at 7:00 am tomorrow morning. We need to leave as soon as we can” “Deep bhaiyya”, Raj put on his puppy face as he walked towards him, “Bhaiyya…actually I’ve got some important work to do here…so I won’t be able to accompany you. Instead Badraa will join you for the trip. Will that be fine?” “Acha thik Hai… you sure you’re not coming?”, Deepraj sounded a bit desperate for Raj’s company. “Sorry bhaiyya, I really have got a lot to do right now”, Raj rejected him with the softest words that he could gather. The night ended with deep talks over beer for the 2 of them… Deepraj went to sleep quite early. The next day arrived and Deepraj left early in the morning.

It was supposed to be a bright sunny day but the weather was quite windy and moist that day. Windows of Deepraj mansion were banging against each other as strong wind blew by. But it seemed like a fine day for Raj to make his first move on his so-called “Bhabhi”. He entered the mansion at lunchtime. Lipakshi was working out in her bedroom in her sports bra and yoga pants and the weather got steamier when Raj entered the room in his white shirt and black fitted pants. Lipakshi noticed his steps from far away and switched to squats. Raj finally entered the room and all that he could do was to stare at Lipakshi’s sultry figure. Lipakshi ignored him, continuing her squats. There was pin drop silence in the room but it wasn’t awkward, heat was building up in both of their bodies. Raj didn’t even dare to open his mouth, he tried muttering “Lipakshi” but when he couldn’t, he finally gave in. The spontaneity of the moment was too much to hold on to, Lipakshi just couldn’t hold herself back from the six feet, handsome meal standing right in front of her. She finally stopped her workout and turned towards Raj. “ahh, you men …aren’t you the greatest hypocrites of the world?”, she said as she held Raj by his collar. The first move was finally made and Raj was all ready to do his part. Clothes were torn, undergarments were destroyed, kisses were smothered, love bites were engraved on both of their bodies. Lipakshi was her happiest self now, she had finally found somebody with whom she could share a part of herself. But she was so, so afraid of getting caught this time, that she took every precaution possible to hide her beloved from the rotten eyes of her husband.

Lipakshi and Raj’s relationship had started growing beyond their sex. Their relation had grown into something beautiful and memorable. Deepraj spent most of his time outside the mansion which gave these lovebirds even more private time. But the best days were spent every time Deepraj left for Lucknow for 2–3-day trips. Raj used to find various excuses to avoid these trips but Deepraj never suspected him about doing something malicious behind his back. Trust really does take up the best out of a person.

It was one of those nights when Deepraj was off to Lucknow and the whole mansion belonged to Raj and Lipakshi, their bodies were tired after a long session of love making. Lipakshi was resting in Raj’s arms and she decided to start a very deep conversation with him. “Raj, you know that I love you, right?”, she said but Raj straight away ignored her question “I am tired of living in this mansion, being the wife of a stranger and longing for you all the time. I am soon going to book 2 tickets for us so that we could elope to somewhere peaceful. Where do you want to go?”, another question was ignored but Lipakshi continued,” I’d love to explore Shimla with you. But it’s okay for me if you want to go somewhere else. We can finally find our happily ever after there…Oh my god, I’m so excited, good days are finally on the way! But Raj”, Lipakshi’s tone suddenly grew serious, “Are you willing to leave everything for me….do you really love me?” Raj was quite hesitant but he composed himself enough to say, “sure darling, whatever you say, I’ll be there right beside you.”

A year later…

A year had passed since Raj had joined Deepraj’s company and summer was back to its best. Deepraj was returning from one of his Lucknow trips. It was 12:00 am already and he pulled up his rover in the parking lot. Exhausted due to the journey, he started unlocking the door, and stumbled upon something. He saw a khaki envelope sitting right underneath his feet. He opened up the envelope only to find some photographs he was too tired to look at.

The next day at the mansion was a lazy one. Deepraj relaxed on his armchair as he bathed in the vitamin D filled sun. He opened the envelope of photographs and he couldn’t believe what he saw next. The photographs were of Lipakshi and her new lover. Getting such photographs anonymously was nothing new for him, but this time the photographs enraged the hell out of him. Lipakshi snogging other men was morning tea but the person she was snogging immediately raged him up.

How did this little fuck even dare to look at my wife? he thought to himself.

He immediately called Raj and told him to come over to the mansion at 8:00 pm, “Bhaiyya…actually my parents are leaving today so I need to send them off. Is it okay if I join you at breakfast tomorrow?”, Raj said

“Nahi Raj. You can come after sending your parents off. Any time after 8 is fine with me. Tonight, I need to discuss something very important with you. You’ll come, won’t you?”

“Jaroor bhaiyya, I’ll be there as soon as I can”, Raj ended the phone call only to get another one from Lipakshi.

“My beloved husband is too tired to even move a muscle, he’ll soon fall asleep that’s when I’ll be packing my bags for tomorrow’s train at 6:00 pm. The tickets are already booked. It’s time for our ‘together forever’ now”

“Ah ha…my monster seems too excited today”, Raj teased Lipakshi.

“Raj, I am Hella serious about this, I’ll be waiting for you at 5:30 on the platform. You’ll come na… won’t you?”

“Sure baby, let’s meet at the platform tomorrow, done it is, I love you “

The phone call ended and the remaining day went by quickly.

It was 11 pm when Raj arrived at the mansion. Deepraj was sitting on Lipakshi’s swing with a beer in his left hand while his right hand balanced himself on the swing. His plain white kurta was stained due to his tears and they were rolling down his eyes continuously. Overall, he seemed to be in a pretty horrible state. “Bhaiyya!”, Raj exclaimed as he saw his bhaiyya’s condition “Kya Hua bhaiyya, why are you crying?” “Don’t call me bhaiyya …please”, he said while grabbing Raj’s hand. He leaned in to give Raj a tight hug which made Raj extremely awkward, Deepraj then got even closer trying to kiss Raj on his lips and that’s when Raj reached his limits. “Bhaiyya what is happening…please tell me”

“Tum hi ho yaar Raj” Deepraj said as his tears turned into waterfalls, “You are the only one who loves me for who I am. You might wonder why me and Lipakshi are not able to have kids right?”, Deepraj said out of nowhere.

“Nahi bhaiyya aisa kuch Nahi Hai…”, Raj tried to explain but he was cut off by Deepraj as always.

“Ruko Raj. Let me talk now. Let me tell you about all the hurt I’ve been carrying over my shoulders all this while. I was a very different child since childhood, an introvert and a completely opposite person than what I am now. There was this boy called Saumya whom I loved. We were a couple since high school. He was my best friend and my life partner. He was the only close person I had opened up to until my father saw us together, making out in the back of a car and that was the end of our story. My father then locked me up and forced me to marry Lipakshi for some bullshit political alliance and as of Saumya, till date I have no idea about what happened to his family or him. Life ended the moment my dad separated us from each other. You tell me Raj; how can I satisfy a stranger woman for whom I don’t even feel anything. Hence, I decided not to have any children of my own. Baba died without having any grandchildren but his punishment still lives on. Lipakshi never stopped being a pain in the ass. But in the midst of all that was going on… I found you Raj, I finally found my happiness. I found my peace. Work has been so much fun since the day you joined my company. I loved spending time with you, may it be discussing business strategies while working or just having deep talks over beer late at night. It took me so long to realize how madly I was in love with you”, Deepraj said as he gently placed hand on Raj’s, “I love you Raj, I love you to the moon and back and I want us to be together, I want to make this work”, Deepraj lifted their intertwined hands together. Tears were welling up in Raj’s eyes as if he was desperately waiting for this moment to arrive. Raj pulled Deepraj into a tight embrace.

“Ek aur baat”, Deepraj said without breaking the embrace, “your friend Badraa seems quite interested in Lipakshi. I never even imagined that dumbfuck to be so brave.”, Deepraj said pointing towards the photographs on the table. “He really did dare to make a move on my wife. And according to what Ranjhesh heard, they are both going to leave the town using the 6'oclock train tomorrow. But I am going to end this torture, once and for all. I am going to teach Badraa the biggest lesson of his life tomorrow. But I need your help. Will you help me Raj?”, They finally made eye contact. “Have I ever said no to you Deep? Batao, how can I help you?”, Raj said.

“I need you to kill Lipakshi”, a moment of silence followed as Deepraj completed his sentence.

“Ha….Even I want to eliminate that nasty woman out of our life”

Our life? He really does love me, Deepraj thought.

“I’ll be there at the station and I will be the only one to witness her struggle for the last breaths of her life. I’ll kill her right when she reaches the station to catch her train”, Raj said without showing even an inch of hesitation. Raj and Deepraj had spent loads of nights together in the front yard but this one hit different. Every embrace felt short as time passed. Tomorrow was going to be a big day in both of their lives, so their little get together didn’t last too long.

Lipakshi’s doomsday had arrived. She packed her suitcase and escaped her house using the backside gate. The moment she stepped foot out of that house, she felt like the freest bird in the world, just the way it was before she got married. Lipakshi started her journey towards the station as Deepraj was beating the shit out of her presumed new lover Badraa who begged for mercy even though he had done nothing wrong. For the first time in his life Deepraj felt happy, not because he was punishing someone, but for the fact that he was going to be happy for the rest of his life now. He was going to live a life he had always dreamt about. He received a WhatsApp message from Raj right and he stopped everything that was going on and opened the message only to find a video clip. Like every lover in this world, he was quite curious what that might be about so he opened the message.

“Hey Deepraj, I am recording this as I leave for another country. Surprised, aren’t you? Maa and baba are right beside me. You want to see them? Hey maa baba, say hi to the camera for me please”, Raj’s parents waved to the camera with a wide smile having no idea about what their son was doing. The camera again switched to Raj. “Well let me tell you a little something, I was the one who sent you those photographs. And my god, I was so damn sure you would believe them and believe, you did. Bhaiyya”, Raj chuckled as he used his baby voice, “how could you not know there’s something called photoshop in this world. That guy in the white shirt wasn’t Badraa, it was me. So, leave my friend alone please. Also, ain’t I a pretty good actor? For what I did yesterday, I seriously do deserve an Oscar. Ohh… before I forget, let me remind you that I’ve taken all my profit money. Those 250 million dollars belong to me, not you dickhead so don’t panic when you find your account empty. And don’t you dare try to find me… even though you won’t be able to do that even in 1000 lives. This is the reward you get for breaking my father’s leg for no fucking reason, for hurting my family, for pulling generations and generations of my family into being a slave for you, for disrespecting my father, for trying to ruin my life with your “better job offers”, for not even letting your own wife be happy. You deserve everything that has happened to you. You deserve your sadness bhaiyya, YOU DESERVE IT”

Deepraj went blank after what he saw and Badraa took that moment to escape before anything much horrible could happen to him. Deepraj fell to the ground out of shock. He just wanted to fade out of existence. He wanted to go back to his real happy times. He wanted to go back to Saumya. His feelings were too genuine. He had been played once again. It was as if there was no end to his pain so he decided to kill his emotions.

If not Raj, then let it be me who kills Lipakshi. I just can’t stand the sight of her anymore.

Deepraj loaded his gun as he left for the station. It was 6:30 pm already and the train had left the station. There was pin drop silence everywhere as this was the last train for the day. Deepraj saw a silhouette from far away and assuming it was Lipakshi, he started walking towards her. He knew for a fact that Lipakshi won’t leave by herself. She was sitting on a bench and she stood up when she saw Deepraj. “You must be feeling so happy, right?”, she said as tears gathered in her eyes. Deepraj took no time in pointing the gun at her. “oh… so you’re here to kill me”, she regained her posture, “Maarna Hai to maar daalo mujhe… even I don’t wish to live with a husband like you. Even I am tired of living this loveless life” Deepraj pressed his gun hard into her skull but he just couldn’t find the courage to pull the trigger. She might not have helped him through his heartbreak but she had always been the one to stand right beside in these 2 years. Deepraj collapsed into the ground and so did Lipakshi. Death was all she wanted, but how can a person who is already dead from the inside kill her. Tears flowed and the only thing Lipakshi managed to day was, “I am pregnant” and at that moment Deepraj Raj’s words resonated in his mind “ I like to return people’s favours with even more fervour.” Raj’s favour was too much for Deepraj to handle but what else could he do than face it all, after all, he did deserve his sadness right?

#ajeeb daastaans #wierd stories #life is wierd #lovers #bollywood #michtimadhura #short story #netflix

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hoshi-cola · 5 years

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Kimora Phillips - Updated Info

Name: Kimora Phillips Organization: Formerly Navy SEALs Code Name: Snare Age: 29 Birthdate: November 22nd Birth Place: Bakersfield, California Panethnicity: Asian-American Eye Color: Emerald green Hair Color: Chocolate cherry [Reddish-Brown] Height: 5”11’ Weight: 143 lbs (65kg)

Position: Attacker Stats: 3 speed - 1 armor - 1 difficulty

Gadget: A thick wire rope in which she can launch at enemies or barricades. It is a semi-close range gadget. If she launches it at an enemy or teammate, the rope will wrap around the target and pull them close. This, however, puts away her weapon. It takes her 1.5 seconds to pull it back out once again, her target will be stunned for 1 second and takes 0.5 seconds to pull out their own weapon again. Launching at the top of a barricade will make Kimora yank down the barricade. She cannot do this to soft or reinforced walls or Castle’s armour panels. It works similar to Sledge’s hammer, as in it has charges. It has a total of 15 charges. Grabbing an enemy takes up 5 charges while breaching a barricade takes up 3. There is also a cooldown of 10 seconds to her ability, preventing players from spamming the ability on a single enemy or teammate.

Biography:

Kimora’s mother, Cassandra Phillips, lived in California all her life who met Kimora’s father, Dante Wilson when she visited Australia with a few friends. The two kept in contact through the phone and tried their best with the newly invented internet. After a few months, the two had decided that they wanted to test the waters with dating. The two hated the long-distance and Dante bought a ticket to the U.S to move in with Cassandra.

After a few years, Kimora was born as an only child to the couple. To keep up with money, Cassandra got a new job with a higher paycheck but at the cost of more hours. Thus, Cassandra was barely in Kimora’s life in her childhood and Dante took lead in parenting. Due to this, Kimora grew a good relationship with her father and it’s how she grew a small addiction to chilli. As she grew up and she went into middle school, her relationship with her mother became strained which led to multiple arguments between them. These arguments led to arguments between Cassandra and Dante. The two would often yell at each other while Kimora desperately tried to sleep.

Eventually, Cassandra and Dante wouldn’t last and the two broke up. Dante would give up on America and move back to Australia, leaving Kimora with her mother. Kimora and Cassandra’s relationship only got worse as Cassandra began to drink almost daily, it became one of the main points in their arguments that occurred every day for months.

Their arguments led to Kimora’s over-eating problem. This continued into high school where she became overweight and dealt with constant bullying. The bullying became worse as she was diagnosed with vitiligo and patches of her skin began to lose pigment. She dealt with depression and her weight only worsened as a result. But a transfer student who couldn’t care less for her weight started to talk to her and thus, the two quickly became best friends. Jenny, the transfer student, convinced Kimora to start working out to get Kimora happier with her body. Jenny even convinced Kimora to start working out when she was upset or angry to help her cool down.

Eventually, their relationship wasn’t just best friends and the two began secretly dating. The two were masters at hiding it and nobody suspected a thing for months. It wasn’t until Jenny’s father caught the two kisses after arriving home earlier than expected. He exploded into a rage and threatened to kill Kimora before throwing a vase at her, thankfully missing her. She ran out of the house and when she went to school after the weekend, Jenny wasn’t at school. Her family had moved.

Kimora, despite being heartbroken, continued to work out and decided she wanted to join the U.S military as it was what Jenny said she wanted to do. She trained hard almost every day for hours, never returning home until the gym closed. It was something that distracted her from her alcoholic mother. Of course, after weeks of constantly exercising, Kimora ended up in the hospital after passing out in the gym. Her mother never came and after waking up to an empty room, the fact hurt Kimora.

When she turned 18, Kimora packed her bags and left her mother’s house. She got a job and paid her friends to let her stay at their houses for a few weeks. She never enlisted for the military, having lost interest a few months after Jenny left.

However, the aspiration came back in 2015, when women were finally allowed to join the Navy SEALs. She enlisted into the Navy SEALs after taking the SEAL challenge but her vitiligo was an issue to the higher-ups. The increased risk of cancer plus her distinct facial features were concerning to them but thankfully, they came to an agreement. She covered up more than regular SEALs to hide her vitiligo and if her life was ever endangered due to her disease, she would be discharged from the Navy SEALs.

During her years of service, she met operators Valkyrie and Blackbeard. The three quickly bonded and became close, Kimora soon considering them her family. Valkyrie became similar to a big sister to her and was, and still is, very protective of her well-being. She often tries to get Kimora to relax after she had been pushing herself too far. Blackbeard and Kimora, while considering each other like siblings, have a more casual relationship. Blackbeard gives her a few suggestions but doesn’t take action to force Kimora to relax. Regardless of their different methods, the two are supportive and a bit too protective of Kimora, treating her as if she were their little sister.

These relationships ended a year afterwards as Valkyrie and Blackbeard left unexpectedly. Kimora felt abandoned again and struggled in her duties but was performing well enough to keep her job.

In 2019, after a spy gave intel to terrorists, Kimora was attacked in her home by terrorists who intended to use her as a hostage. This attempt failed as the attackers were inexperienced but the damage had been done.

Her higher-ups considered the attack to be caused by her vitiligo and she was terminated from her duties. This ruined her and she spent a few months wallowing in despair as she struggled to get used to civilian life. Thankfully, she managed to get ahold of Blackbeard and explained her situation.

Blackbeard, knowing how much serving meant to her, suggested her to Harry in hopes he would invite her to Rainbow. In which he did. Kimora would join Rainbow in late 2019.

Psychological Profile

When I first met Phillips, it was obvious she had an upbeat personality. She excused her behaviour due to being excited over being able to serve again, more than just her country. Most of our conversations were pleasant, she seems to be optimistic the majority of the time. She also is strongly determined and never seems to back down from her goals, similar to Valkyrie. However, as our conversations got more in-depth, it is just as obvious that she suffers from abandonment issues with many important people leaving her throughout her life, her father, her ex-girlfriend and operators Blackbeard and Valkyrie.

On the topic of operators Blackbeard and Valkyrie, Phillips relationships with them have a rift. She has a small grudge against them for leaving her only a year after the three met. But when asked, she simply brushes it off as understanding they couldn’t tell her where they went but wished they kept in contact out of work.

She also appears to hold a grudge against her former higher-ups for terminating her from her duties. I’ve asked her about this but she avoids the topic to the best of her ability. I feel her hiding her problems may become an issue later on.

Naturally, with a skin disease that increases the risk of cancer, I have put her under the watchful eye of Doc. He displayed his dislike of having someone with the risk of cancer in Rainbow but after some long convincing, he seemed to become neutral on the issue and has agreed to keep an eye on her health.

Regardless of her obstacles, Phillips doesn’t let these things bring her down and this may prove to be her strongest strength. I’m looking forward to having her in Rainbow.

-Dr. Harishva "Harry" Pandey

#rainbow six siege #r6s #rainbow six #blackbeard #valkyrie #r6s oc #oc kimora phillips #oc #original character

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kathleenignacio · 5 years

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Keep your WordPress fit

The WordPress application has matured a lot in its last ten years of existence . The rationalization of many processes such as updates, such as the standardization of many aspects of its functionality, are a dedication to make it simpler to use and incorporate new functions.

No matter how many automations developed in WordPress management, you still need to take extra measures to ensure that your website is fit in terms of performance and security . In this article I will raise certain questions and suggest certain improvements that will help you sustain your website in good shape.

1. Do you have the WordPress core, plugins and updated themes? update wordpress

I'm sure you've heard about this many times before, but it's still the number one question about the security and performance of a WordPress site.

When I look at the statistics of all our servers in SiteGround, I am always surprised and in all circumstances the amount of people who maintain the previous versions despite each and every one of the comforts that both WordPress and the host offer them to keep up to date. without care. These are certain things you could take advantage of:

1.1 Native Updates You probably remember that as of version 3.7, WordPress introduced a native automatic update feature among the smaller versions. This is a huge feature that can be taken advantage of immediately, and that will keep your web page safe at all times.

Most minor version updates are full of security patches, so you should not skip them under any circumstances. And if your WordPress is not yet version three.7 or higher, update as soon as possible so you can benefit from the native changes.

1.2 Managed Hosting Service Also, certain web hosting companies, SiteGround is one of them, they offer a managed WordPress service where you receive a WordPress auto-update whenever there is a new version , and this also includes updates to major versions. And even some of the hosts offer automatic plugin update when the kernel is self-updated.

1.3 Check the WordPress desktop alarms Finally, if you are not benefiting from the services of your host, on the WordPress desktop you will generally receive alarms about new versions of some active complement or the kernel. You just have to click and update it.

1.4 Add a configuration line to have the kernel updated to important versions If you want your WordPress to automatically update to the important versions, not only the minor ones, you can put the following line in your wp-config.php file :

define( 'WP_AUTO_UPDATE_CORE', true ); 1.5 Check before updating Of course you may have certain fears, completely justified, to deconfigure your website when updating it. In this case, I recommend that you make a copy of your website and try it on it first. Again, you can search for hosts that offer a test environment to make this process uncomplicated .

2. What version of PHP do you have? php 7 wordpress

Does your WordPress still work with PHP 5.2? Was this version the default one million years ago when you installed it?

WordPress has already stopped supporting PHP version five.2 and, normally, they tend to encourage their users to stay in the latest version of PHP. For what reason? Well, new versions of PHP are going better and are safer .

PHP 7 , incorporating the Opcode caching and the expected super-performance, will be launched very, very soon (launch options are free on SiteGround servers and you can easily move).

It is the biggest change in PHP code since PHP4 . The latest version of WordPress already supports it. It is a good idea to test how PHP7 is going on your website and update extensions that do not support it, or try to locate solutions. Do not leave.

comparative speed php 7 wordpress

Updating PHP is not as simple as updating WordPress, however, it is not a reason to neglect it. You can consult your host if you can change the version for yourself, or if you are too afraid to spoil your website, go through the testing process suggested above.

3. Do you have any add-on or theme disabled? hacking WordPress plugins themes

I would like to draw your attention to this as I have seen too many websites with more than 40 add-ons disabled . Keep in mind that although they are disabled, the files with the code are really there, in your account. This could potentially create security problems. The same applies to the topics.

The bottom line is that if you are not using a plugin, remove it completely from your application. If you have some payment plugins and do not want to remove them, make a local copy of each and every one of the payment plugins that you have purchased more than you are not using now.

If you are not using a theme, remove it completely from your application. I would advise leaving the last available WordPress theme by default as a foldback, plus everything else, to get rid of it.

4. When did you last optimize your database and review your old articles? optimize wordpress database

The first thing is to clean your database of all the information you don't need. For an example, WordPress saves multiple revisions of your posts. That is excellent, but it fills you with multiple copies of your blog posts, and also implies a considerable increase in the size of the database.

These revisions will not slow down your website, but they will slow down certain processes such as database optimization, creation of backups, and possible backup copies recovery.

I would like to advise you the Better Delete Revision ”add-on to eliminate them. It lets you remove each and every one of the reviews optimizing your database.

On the optimization itself of the databases, you can use a tool like phpMyAdmin or if you have the WP-CLI at your disposal,

5. Have you optimized the size of your images? compress image

The images are a huge part of your website and it is a great idea to do everything you can to optimize them. I personally divide the process into 2 parts:

5.1 Lower the number of thumbnails When you upload an image to your website, WordPress automatically creates several copies of the image and rescale it. The number of thumbnails created depends on the theme.

Currently, there are many themes that give many layers of different pages, and produce dozens of miniatures of different sizes. This inflates the number of images in your account and their size. My advice is to examine all the page models, write down the thumbnails you are really using, and eliminate the ones you don't use, optimizing the space occupied by the images, and the total number of inodes in your account.

Doing this is partially simple: first open the functions.php file on your website, and look for a part of thumbnail creation. It should be something like this:

add_image_size( 'thumbnail-name', 255, ciento noventa y uno, true ); Comment only on the lines responsible for the sizes you don't need. Once that is done, you need to regenerate the thumbnails. I invite you to use the Regenerate thumbnails plugin. Keep in mind that it can take hours to regenerate each and every one, so make sure you do not miss any, and also try not to do so during the busiest hours of your website in terms of traffic.

5.2 Optimize existing images The smaller the image size, the faster the page load will be!

Another preferred add-on that I now add on my sites and on all the ones I work on, is EWWW Image Optimizer. Optima without loss of quality each and every one of the images that you upload to your website, and it has a huge button Optimize all ”to do it directly.

Basically, the plugin reduces the size of your images without decreasing their quality. Great results guaranteed!

6. How fast is your website? What loading speed do you have? web speed

In general, the speed of your website suggests what performance optimizations you can start. If your pages take longer to load more than a second and your score on certain speed tests that I lie in this section is low, start with the preceding suggestions to improve it.

Here are certain tools that I use on a regular basis to test the loading speed of the websites I work with:

Each WordPress installation has a different set of themes, plugins and content, and there is no universal solution or a single approach. You need to regularly update your website, test it, and solve the

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iwatchanimeoccasionally · 5 years

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Alright so, here is the story of Larry (under the read more in case anyone doesn’t want this)

PS this took me 1.5 hours to write and it is about 4.5 thousand words long. I don’t know what I was expecting, but damn.

Sunday, I had the day off and had no plans so Larry was free-roaming from when I got up to about 7 in the evening and she was acting normal that entire time, when I switched her out for Nebula. Around 12:30 AM I went upstairs to give them all their supper and let Deku have her chance at free-roam before I went to bed, which she never takes so she just gets an hour with her cage open before I go to sleep. Immediately, I could tell something was wrong with Larry when she was huddled in her litter box and didn’t perk up and come check her hay when I put it in her feeder and jump up to see me. I called out for her a couple times, thinking maybe she was just sleeping really soundly, but still, she barely flicked an ear in my direction. I went ahead and finished feeding the other pets first, wanting to make sure everyone was taken care of before I could give 100% of my attention to Larry.

Finally, everyone was fed and watered, and Larry still wasn’t even acknowledging that I was feeding her when I gave her pellets, which she has always been super excited for. So I went in her cage, which I try to avoid doing because all rabbits would much rather come to you than have you in their personal space. I reached out to pet her, and she just let me. Might not seem like a huge thing if you don’t own rabbits or don’t know how mine are, but normally if she’s in her litter box and decide to pet her without her asking for it first, she will lunge and grunt at me. So, now I have a couple red flags being set off and scaring me.

Already feeling the tears burning my eyes, I try to pick her up. Again, no fight. She just let me. Never happens. She likes being held sometimes, but never does she let me get in her cage and pick her up from her litter box without a fight! That is her sacred alone space that I shouldn’t be allowed to pet her in, let alone lifting her. So now I’m fully crying and taking her into my mom’s room because there is something deeply wrong with my baby and it’s nearly 1 AM at this point in a small town, so I don’t know what to do. I go in and just sob out, “There’s something really wrong with Larry.”

Now, even with others cohabiting with her, I am the only one who really knows Larry. I mean, yeah, other people know some of her mannerisms and know that she is amazing and love her. But there is not a single person in this world who knows all about her like I do. So I’m blown off a little bit, Mom thinking that she might just be really tired or in a funny mood today. She has me put Larry on her bed to see how she acts, and she’s alert, moving around a little bit, but now anywhere near her normal activity levels. (meanwhile Alek is just wondering what the hell is going on because she’s not supposed to be in there, that’s his space, but he’s still nervous enough around her that he wouldn’t dare get close) I explain that she’s not eating, or expressing any interest in her food, and Mom’s first thought is, “Did you try giving her a bit of banana to see if she’ll eat that?”

Of course I hadn’t done that. The thought did very briefly cross my mind, but I immediately brushed it off because, fun fact, if your rabbit is having stomach issues it’s not really the best idea to give them sugar, which is enough to mess up their GI tract if handled poorly on a good day. But I go with it, run downstairs to get a banana to let her have a tiny bite of. When I go back upstairs, she’s acting mostly alert and immediately eats a bit of the fruit with no fight. Which seemed to put my mom’s mind to rest, but not mine. Because this isn’t normal and what if I just made it worse.

After expressing my concerns, I’m urged to just go back to bed and if she’s not back to normal in the morning, I can just call out from work and we’ll take her to the vet. So, Larry and I go back to my room and I put her back in her cage, where she immediately goes back to her litter box. I offer to hand feed her some pellets and sunflower seeds (black oil, the only kind they can have in moderation), neither of which she has ever been known to turn down. This time, though, she has 0 interest. She doesn’t even want to smell them. So I sit there for a while, still in tears, wondering what I can do for her.

Then I remember that I have critical care! So I go downstairs to grab that, assuming this is all a case of stasis, which is terrible but supposedly manageable if you catch it in time and get your rabbit on critical care until you can go to the vet. I also grab her favorite treat, which is just made of compressed hay so I figure it won’t hurt her to have if she’s willing to eat it. When I get back upstairs, I pull Larry out again and we hang out on my bed, where I try to spoon feed her critical care because I don’t have a syringe so that’s the only way I can mange. She has zero interest, and when I try to put it on a piece of banana, she just eats what little banana she can get without critical care on it. But we hang out for a while, her mostly just laying in one spot and ignoring me. Until finally she gets tired of being there and decides it’s time to get back to her litter box.

Back in her cage, I let her just lay there and sit as close as I think I can without feeling like I’m going to stress her out when she gets a bit closer to normal. For the next several hours we just sit there. I sing to her for a while, starting with her favorite song, as that’s something that usually calms her.

Finally, 7 AM rolls around and I have been sobbing off and on for the pas 6.5 hours and she’s still not better. So, I leave her alone for a minute and go back to my mom, updating her on the situation and letting her know that we need to go to the vet (she’s driving because I’m not super comfortable driving on a good day, let alone when I’m crying myself sick over Larry). Of course, she tells me to call them and oops, I got times mixed up in my panic and exhaustion so they’re not even open for another hour.

Still though, she’s taking me seriously and gets up to get ready. I call work while she’s in the bathroom. My newest coworker answers the phone and I didn’t even think to ask for a manager or anything, I’m just immediately off with, “Something’s really wrong with Larry and I’m not coming in today because I’m going to try to take her to the vet and even if they don’t have time for her, I can’t work when she’s like this. Oh yeah, Larry’s my rabbit, I don’t know if I’ve told you that before.”

“Ok, so, you want me to tell *manager’s name* for you?”

Slight pause on my part as I realize I should’ve asked if she was working before I tell her to please do that for me.

Eight come by finally, and the second the clock turns I’m dialing the vet. She offers me an 11 or I can bring Larry in sooner and they can work on her between appointments. I ask how soon, and she says I can come in as soon as possible, so of course I go with that option.

By 8:15 we’re at the vet’s office and I’m checking her in. Larry’s already pulled up on the computer even though I never gave my name over the phone, so she’s well known enough there that they were able to find her without anything more than her name and species, and that makes me feel a little warm and fuzzy inside even through all the terror and panic.

The vet asks a couple questions: what exactly is going on with her, how long has she been like this, was she normal on saturday(which my sleep deprived brain had a really hard time figuring out wasn’t just yesterday anymore), what do I normally feed her, those sorts of things. He also asked if he had permission to do x-rays and/or bloodwork if need be and I am just flabbergasted that he asked, replying with, “Do whatever it takes to help her.” He also tells me that cancer can sometimes cause those symptoms, and I immediately freak out because what am I gonna do if she has cancer? We’re out and on our way back home by 8:30, and surprise surprise, I cried through her check-in and all the way home.

The next couple hours and a blur of stress and terror and anxiety as I try to convince myself that she’s not dying.

At 10:20 the vet calls. He ended up taking x-rays and thinks her stomach and intestines are extremely full so he’s just going to give her fluids and monitor her for a while to see if she’s able to pass whatever blockage there may be on her own. I mentioned then that she was molting like crazy and I was having a hard time keeping up with brushing, so it might be her fur as I know that’s common with rabbits, and the doc agrees that may be it. We hang up then with a promise for him to call me back with more information in a couple hours.

1:50 comes and my concern is creeping in enough that I can’t keep fighting it off, so I call them back to see how she’s doing. The vet then tells me that he sent the x-rays off to a specialist to see what she thought and she told him that those were normal levels of fullness and that now it might be her liver so he needs to do bloodwork. The tests were almost done when I called, so he said he’d call me back in about ten minutes when they finished.I’m already freshly terrified and breaking down because what if it is her liver? What then?

20 minutes later, he calls back with bad news.

I don’t remember what, exactly, the numbers were or what they were for, but one was about 4x what it was supposed to be and another was about double. This made the specialist think that she had a flipped liver lobe, which is apparently common in rabbits. What that means, though, is that she needs emergency surgery as soon as possible. He tells me the risks; he’s never done that surgery on a rabbit before, the specialist only does about 5 a year and has about a 60-80% success rate, surgery is already risky for rabbits, and it absolutely has to be done tonight. He then says that he’d really like to give it a shot and would do his very best for her if I chose to have him do it. Also said was the fact that I’d have to drive 2.5 hours in July in Iowa to get to the specialist, and I don’t know if you know this, but rabbits don’t do well with heat. And if we went to the specialist, they’d probably charge $1,000-$2,000 while he would only charge about $400 since it’d be a lot more risky to do such an experimental surgery with him.

I am fully sobbing, crouched in on myself and guttural sobs wracking my body on the front porch when I hang up with him, having asked for 10 minutes to make some calls and come to a decision. Which was never really a decision anyway because she couldn’t handle that drive, I couldn’t pay the price, and the risks are still too high to go to the specialist. Really, I’m mainly just taking a second to break down and call my mom before I tell this man, who has never even met my baby before this incident, to do an extremely risky procedure on my baby, my entire world.

When I talk to my mom, she offers to come home from work to be with me.After calling the vet back and leaving a message for her doctor to call me back, I go back inside to update the rest of my family and my grandma asks if I’m going to the vet to see her. I hadn’t even thought that was an option so I perk up a little and call my mom back to see if she would take me. Apparently, she had already assumed we were doing that. I’m still freaking out, but i feel a little better that I’ll be able to see her at least. While I wait for her to get to the house, I call my boss to let her know that I’d be missing Tuesday as well. I’m mostly composed when she answers, but as soon as she knows it’s me, she asks if I’m ok.

Of course, the answer is no and I start crying again when I answer. “So, Larry’s not ok?” And my boss is a good woman, I can hear the concern in her voice and she is completely ok with me missing another day when I explain the situation to her and let her know that there is no way I’m coming in tomorrow. Right when I’m hanging up, my mom pulls up and we’re off to the vet for the second time that day.

Just as we get there and let the person at the counter know we’re there for Larry, the vet calls me back and I let him know that I’m already there and that he had good timing. I can hear him echoing from the hallway and am no prepared for any of this.

He ushers us into a conference room then for some privacy. I immediately say, “If you can tell me that there are any odds of her surviving, I’ll let you do her surgery.” Being a doctor, he obviously responded with the risks and not promising anything, apparently thinking I wanted a promise that she’d live. All I wanted was a guarantee that she wasn’t doomed. The risks were still the same as before, and I was getting a little tired of hearing it all repeated back to me.

Then I ask to see her, still half expecting to be told no, but he seemed to think that was the natural next step. So he started leading us back to her and he warned me that she was wearing a cone of shame because she had an IV for fluids and she kept trying to chew it out, which I actually was able to laugh at a little because that is so Larry of her. He also goes over her numbers with my mom because I sure didn’t pass along any information that I didn’t deem crucial.

We get to her and she’s huddle in the back of the kennel, pissed off to have the cone on. The vet warns me not to let her jump out before he opens the door for me, and I’m in there like a rocket, petting her and talking to her and crying. I don’t remember everything I said to her, but I do know I said the following, “Please don’t die, you’re my entire world, you can’t die now,” “Be strong for me and get through this surgery like a champ,” “I love you so so much,” “I’m sorry you don’t feel good,” “I can’t do this without you, I love you so much, please be strong for me.”

Mom talked to her too, apparently telling her she can’t die because she doesn’t think I could go on if she did.

We talked to the vet a bit more once we closed the kennel, my mom breaking down because she thought the number he gave me was for everything so far and the surgery would be $1000 and we can’t afford that. But he quickly assured us it wouldn’t be that expensive and it was the range he gave earlier, which I could handle.

I also asked if this was something I did wrong, which it wasn’t, and if those numbers could happen in hours or if I had somehow missed signs for days, which I hadn’t. So, even though I was still completely broken, I at least felt a tiny bit of selfish relief that I hadn’t done anything wrong.

Before I talked to her for the last time before leaving, I asked if she would have to stay overnight, which was a definite yes and he thought she might even have to stay the next night as well. He also let us know that it would be a few hours before he called again about how it went.

The next couple hours, I’m so on edge, but I’m temporarily out of tears to cry after the first ten minutes or so of being home and updating my sister, who had been at work all day and just got home. Mom went back to work then, as well, since my sister was home and she knew I had company that would keep me from going too dark in my mind.

At 5:10 I wander away from my phone for one minute, thinking the ringer would be loud enough to call me back if I got the call.

At 5:11, I check my phone and see that I missed a call from the vet.

At 5:12 I call back to see what’s up and get sent to the after hours answering service.

At 5:13 I notice I have a voicemail.

“Hi, this is Dr. *name* from *vet clinic name*. I’m just calling to let you know that Larry’s surgery went well and she’s awake.”

Immediately, I’m crying again, but finally it’s from happiness and relief rather than fear and an aching sadness.

I call my mom right away and tell her the good news, crying all the while and ecstatic at finally having good news to share.

I don’t remember then if I called them and requested the on-call vet or if he called me, but I was soon on the phone with the vet with him telling me the good news yet again. I thank him profusely and he asks if they could post pictures of Larry on their facebook page because they like doing that sometimes, which I wouldn’t have refused even if I didn’t love sharing pictures of Larry almost as much as I love her.

Despite my relief, I miss Larry all evening and sleep is hard that night without her in the room.

The next morning, I get a call at 9:10 that Larry is alert and ready to come home! I shoot out of bed and we’re at the vet’s for her within 15 minutes. I open the carrier as soon as they bring her out, and she’s already trying to climb out to see me and I’m barely holding back my tears of joy.

We have to stay then to talk to the assistant who brought her out, and all the while she’s standing up and looking around and just so happy to see me. Which I know sounds like I’m just projecting, but she genuinely was happy to see me and to be coming home. While we’re talking to the assistant, Larry’s normal vet comes out and comments on how good Larry is looking and how bad it sounded yesterday.

We make it home by 10:30 and she is as you’d expect a rabbit to be after surgery. Her appetite is very low and she doesn’t want to drink water. I let it go for an hour before I call the vet, wondering if I need to be concerned at the fact that she’s barely eating or pooping and her poops are weird. All is to be expected and I’m told to call back around 3-4 if she’s not getting better.

Eventually, I get tired just talking over the phone, and I just go the the office to show them a picture of her poop. Of course, I’m told that this is normal for a post-surgery bunny and her vet is nice so she’d never tell me that I’m being over protective and crazy paranoid, but I’m sure she’s thinking it. She gives me a probiotic to mix with her food just to make me feel better and make sure that Larry keeps pooping.

The rest of that day is relatively calm, I keep Larry in her cage because rabbits need limited running and jumping right after surgery, and I have to stop myself from sitting with her all day and bothering her to eat and drink. Still, I can’t stop myself from checking her every half hour to hour. Eventually, she gets to the point where she sees me enter the room and grabs a piece of hay to get me off her back.

The next morning(this morning) is a different story. I wake up at 6 AM to Nebula flipping out, chewing her litter box and trying to bang it around. I give her hay, because normally that’s all she wants when she’s being like that, then I look at Larry because as long as I’m awake I should check on her.

She’s laying sprawled out with her stomach pressed on the bottom of her cage. Normal way to lay down for rabbits, sure. Not normal? I called her name and she didn’t respond. I immediately panic, calling the on-call vet before I’m even to her cage.

Her normal vet answers, groggy and clearly just waking up, and as soon as I hear her name I’m crying and saying, “Larry’s not responsive and laying with her stomach pressed to the floor and I’m scared.”

“That’s not normal. I can meet you at the office, but it won’t be until 7.” The vet clinic is split with a couple other towns and the vets are shared, so I assume she just lives that far away? Whatever the reason, I agree and she says she’ll call me when she’s nearly there.

Naturally, I go to wake up my mom again to update her and to cry to her again. She tells me to go ahead and get Larry ready to go, which I do, and as soon as I offer the carrier to Larry, she starts to perk up and climbs in. I take her to sit in the hallway then, opening the top to pet her. After a few minutes, she hops out and just starts wandering, like nothing is even wrong.

Even still I want to go in because what if I’m not crazy? So I put her away for a bit until I get the call to head in, and she’s acting normal. Of course. At this point I think she might just be a little groggy and harder to wake up, but nothing scary.

We go in, and the vet is happy to see her relatively normal. Again, she’s too nice to call me crazy, but I apologize for it anyway and she brushes me off, saying she’d rather see her and have it be nothing than the opposite, which is my thought exactly.

After examining her, the vet decides she seems to be in good health but her temperature is a little high, so she gave her a shot of penicillin and tells me to check back in on Friday because it’s supposed to last two days. Since then, she’s been (almost) her normal self.

She’s still on cage rest and I’m forcing myself to leave her alone more today and she’s really starting to seem better. She’s eating on her own more and I actually have a funny story from earlier today.

I went to check on her and gave her a treat to try to get her to eat more. She took it from me and I was really happy, because that hadn’t happened since she came home. I thanked her then for eating, and she started to eat a piece of hay. Again, I thanked her and asked her to keep doing that if I left her alone. So, I closed the door to her cage and she stopped eating. “No, keep eating,” I say and she starts chewing again. I take a few steps away and notice that she finished the piece she was eating but kept pretending to chew. “Come on, actually eat please.” She chins her food, like she could fool me into thinking she was eating by having her face close to the hay. “That’s not eating, I’m not dumb.” Finally she grabs a piece and starts chewing, stopping as soon as I turn my head even though I’m still watching her. “I see you...” And finally, she keeps eating and I hear her still munching as I leave the room.

And, for the latest update for the day, I went to give her dinner a little early because I want a schedule for the probios stuff she gets with her food, and she had eaten a good amount of her alfalfa hay (which she normally doesn’t get because it’s got a higher fat content that timothy, but I have some on hand for growing girl Nebula and it’s more tasty so she gets that until her appetite is closer to normal) and when I gave her romaine lettuce (to help with fiber and hydration) she ate a decent amount from hand feeding before she got tired of that, but then she ate all the rest that I just left in there for her!

So, long story short, Larry very nearly died but she didn’t and she’s looking pretty good right now!

#Larry Queen #50 shades of buns #long post #sorry for any spelling or grammar errors #i'm crying writing this #and i'm not about to read it again to edit #i'll probably update this in the coming days during her recovery #to keep you all updated #and also because i want to keep track of it all

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filmsthirteen · 5 years

Text

Finding Myself through Cameron Crowe Films

*Minor Spoilers*

There are a handful of directors, writers, artists, and singers who have influenced my life. Yet there is only a handful of them who consistently released art that contributed to the person I have moulded into, (despite only being 19 and thinking this is the final version of myself). But one filmmaker in particular, resonates as having created films that were pressed play constantly as a teenager. That filmmaker is the man, the myth, the legend, Cameron Crowe. If it were up to me, he’d be Sir Cameron Crowe. An artist who had managed to shape multiple generations and accurately reflect on generations that once existed. From the early eighties, Crowe has contributed to the films that teens flocked to the theatre to see when they were released, and many years later, those teens would show their kids those films. Thus, I was thankfully brought up by brilliant films such as Fast Times at Ridgemont High, Say Anything, Singles, and Almost Famous. All those films manage to capture adolescence and young adulthood, through numerous characters, eras, and most importantly, through the use of music. Now that I’m in my final year of being a teenager, and entering the next phase of my life, I thought it was time to thank Cameron Crowe for guiding me through these seemingly treacherous years.

I was raised on eighties films. I always had the blessing of having parents who were really into films, and so I was constantly shown film after film. Many of them were teen films of the eighties. So, of course, there were many late nights of watching Pretty in Pink, Heathers, and Risky Business. Though Crowe's films obviously ended up in the mix, the first time I remember sitting down to watch one of his films ended up being around thirteen. My Dad got me one of those three pack special DVDs from Walmart, with Sixteen Candles and The Breakfast Club. Both of them I was absolutely obsessed with and made me long to be a teenager. Despite John Hughes being the legend he is, the third film, Fast Times at Ridgemont High, was the one that stuck with me through all four years of high school. I watched the film on my own the night before my first day of high school. I was starting that year off fresh; all my friends were going to the public school, while my parents shipped me off to the Catholic school the next town over, where I’d have to wear khaki cardboard material like pants, and polyester shirts in either green, white or blue. I worried my entire summer about the first day of high school; walking down halls I didn’t know, sitting beside people I never had the pleasure of knowing since kindergarten. On Stacy's (Jennifer Jason Leigh) first day of high school, American Girl by Tom Petty plays. Immediately I grabbed my iPod touch, added it to my iTunes, and played it on repeat on my hour and a half long bus ride, and into the doors of the school. Minus doing it with an older dude, getting pregnant, and brushing up my blowjob skills with a carrot in front of the cafeteria, I wished I was like Stacy. Having a cool job in the mall, somehow being gorgeous all the time (even during exam season?) and having a really sweet guy like Mark take you on a date to a really fancy German restaurant, seemed like an experience I deserved. But Cameron wrote about things in this film so painfully realistic to the high school experience, even thirty years later. I knew girls who went out with weird guys way too old for them, having plans for the future destroyed, and of course, having a teacher who thinks that everyone is on dope (which they're totally right about). It doesn't exaggerate the experience of a teenager, making the film so close to the truth as a film can get. Perhaps its due to Crowe actually spending the year as an undercover student, and honestly, all teen films should've been fact-checked like this one.

Less than seven years later, Crowe came out with Say Anything. Though my Mom loves this movie, and used to watch it whenever it would come on TV, it was the 2010 film Easy A that actually got me to watch the movie. I made it a point to go back and watch all those films that Emma Stone’s character lists off when discussing if chivalry is dead. Thus I ended up watching Can’t Buy Me Love, Sixteen Candles, The Breakfast Club, Ferris Bueller's Day Off, and of course, Say Anything. I wanted my life to be like an 80s movie directed by John Hughes, but I got it so much better, I got a life unintentionally directed by Cameron Crowe. And because of that, I fell in love with wanting to be that smart girl like Diane Court. I look back now on how much studying I did in high school, and how it paid off to where I am now. It’s important for filmmakers to add these characters, ones were they say that girls can be pretty and smart, not settling for the cliched pick and choose scenario. So I worked hard, writing endless essays, studying late at night for a math test, and juggled clubs and activities. But still, I wished to also have that and be wanted by someone. Like Lloyd Dobler, who wants Diane so much, its all he thinks about. But listen, for once I can say the character of Lloyd isn't some creepy dude, who has an obsession and is purely motivated by this girls essence. Again, there are way too many films with the lead guy being solely provoked by a woman's body. But when he gets her, he holds on, noting that her feelings are reciprocated. She could go off to Oxford, and he’d be right there. Perhaps love at this age is rare, but when you know, well you know. And that's a huge difference that my generation can see. Though many of us have grown up with divorced parents, constant cheating, and unreciprocated feelings, at such a young age, we shouldn't keep that from the actual emotions that we are meant to feel for another human. Maybe we are supposed to give it all, and as I watch this film, I’m not wondering what if Lloyd didn't go about the relationship as he did, I wonder how Lloyd and Diane are. Because like I said, he wants her so bad that he stands outside of her house after a fight, holding that boombox up high, blasting the best love song of all time, In Your Eyes by Peter Gabriel. I can’t even tell you the amount of times I’ve had that song on an endless repeat, but I can promise that I most likely broke the record the summer of ‘18. I longed to be sought after like Diane (cause who honestly doesn't want to be so enormously desired by someone you love?). By the end of the August heat, I laid awake at night, waiting for that song to be played outside of my window (actually would've freaked me out but still, the thoughts nice). But that song ended up being played during the fall, plenty of times in the cold winter days, and in the early spring, all the while so content with listening to it at this very moment. Sometimes boys and girls, it's good to just say anything (add wink emoji here).

Despite still being totally obsessed with all things of 80s culture, it's time to bring up that phase that wasn't ever a phase, but the depths of my soul. The tenth grade brought about my “grunge phase.” I got my nose pierced, splurged on Doc Martens, stocked my closet with various coloured flannel shirts and band tees. I wanted people to know that I listened to Nirvana, Guns n Roses, and Pearl Jam, despite it being on my shirt that I’d wear under my uniform sweater. My eyeliner was thick black, and my tweets were usually lyrics from some band part of the Seattle Sound. My Dad was in his teens when the Seattle sound came about, and thus as a kid, I spent many car rides hearing Alice in Chains ‘Dirt’ album, Pearl Jam’s the ‘Ten’ album, and Nirvana’s ‘Unplugged’ album on the radio. For me, I was the real shit when it came to this era of my life. And that became the perfect opportunity for my dad to introduce me to Crowe’s ‘92 film Singles. A group of young adults who all live in (a now extremely famous) the same apartment complex, during the height of the Seattle sound. Surprise surprise, they reside in Seattle. Honestly, there could've been no better film for my dad to turn on. With cameos from my bae Eddie Vedder and the late Chris Cornell, the film brings so much to the group of young adults who chose to immerse themselves in real boy bands, compared to whatever the other ones who sang with earpieces paired with synchronized dances did. No offence. Dealing with the idea of relationships, whether we are to settle or have fun in our 20s, Singles is supposed to be about Gen Xer’s, yet, I can see how many millennials still have this issue. There are plenty of girls I know who have used their ex’s t-shirts to clean their toilets, and though we aren't making dating VHS’s, they are perfecting their tinder profiles, hoping that actual human connection exists on the other end. The biggest point in the film that got me, (despite being sixteen trying to imagine myself in four years time), was the whole fear of what if you commit and what if you don’t? There are many ways you can mess up potential, and still, it lies within not calling after a date, or in our case, texting after hanging out. Sometimes we just need people to say and do the right things without having to tell them what is the right thing to do or say. And if it all works out, we’ll end up like Steve and Linda who move out the single bedroom apartment, and into never having to be labelled again as a single.

Eight years came about the semi autobiographical story of Crowe himself, Almost Famous. The film with the best soundtrack of all time, due to it having a budget of 3.5 million, compared to most films with budgets of about 1.5 million. Honestly, that's the best use of money in all of human history. And thanks to Zooey Deschanel’s duffel bag, we get to hear Simon and Garfunkel, Led Zeppelin, The Beach Boys, and everyone's favourite, Elton John. You cannot tell me you did not get goosebumps hearing Tiny Dancer being sung in unison by Kate Hudson, Billy Crudup, Patrick Fugit, Jason Leigh, and well I could go on forever about the well-casted film. Before watching the film, I remember that Fool in the Rain was my favourite Zeppelin song. But after watching it for the first time, I had probably had listened to Led Zeppelin’s song Tangerine a hundred times. If a film has such tangible (see what I did there) scenes, and a song contains such a powerful presence, then that is mastering filmmaking in my opinion. Thus, this film was watched during all sorts of moments in my adolescence. The time I wanted to work as a journalist for Rolling Stone, when I was in need of a change, and when I was absolutely alone and only a Cameron Crowe film understood me. And each time I was damn near tempted to be a roadie for a somewhat known band, who hopefully was opening for Black Sabbath. Actually, it was very much this film that got me more obsessed with concerts than I was before. I’d buy tickets as soon as they’d go on sale, mostly to smaller bands, that way I’d have a chance of being up close, and even meeting the band. Like William, I’d wait by the stage doors for the band. Dragging my friends to the concert at least twelve hours before the show would start, just so I could meet bands like Peach Pit, Pale Waves, Colouring, and well other indie bands that I’m sure slim to no adults know. Believe me, I’d wait a week for Black Sabbath if I could. But beyond that, I think that every young person deserves the life, encapsulated in this film; of just going out there and being absolutely free. You know, before life kicks in. And that's really what this film, amongst nearly all of Crowe's films, demonstrate. Get out there kid, put on those headphones, blast some Lynyrd Skynyrd, and just live before you die. Being obsessed with listening to classic rock, I devoured the only season of Paul Feig’s Freaks and Geeks, and had Almost Famous’s soundtrack on repeat. I owned a long green army jacket, and also a faux sheepskin sherpa coat. I was both Lindsey Weir and Penny Lane. I was walking down the two hallways of my high school, and the one street of my small towns downtown, earbuds in, Fleetwood Mac blasting. And through the many characters of these films, they reminded me that I’m here for the art. For the music from the Bookends album, the score of a Tim Burton film, and the tracks of a Tarantino picture. Like Kathy and Paul who went off to see America, Lindsey who goes off to a Grateful Dead concert with her best friend, and Penny Lane who is off to her dream destination of Morocco, I myself am off to see and hear the world.

It's odd to look back on these films that meant so much to who I was and who I’ve become. I’m in my last year of being a teenager, and I’m almost done university’ yet I still feel so attached to these characters I feel that I someway embodied. But that's not because I based my life off these characters Crowe created, it's really because Crowe based these characters off of people that exist in life. In those years of watching any teen film out there, Crowes (and of course Hughes) inspired me to look around constantly, taking notes on the friends I had spent lunches on Thursdays, discussing films with, just in case I’d make a film reminiscent about them. In my seemingly ordinary life, Crowe told me to go out and grab those who write seemingly precognition notes in your yearbook. Most importantly, Crowe told me to just let the music guide me through life. And for that, I got my life to be directed by Cameron Crowe.

INT. Credits being to roll, as ELTON JOHN’S TINY DANCER plays.

FADE OUT

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