#*monty python voice* i got better

[smoureart]

The Danse Macabre

Fable has died twice in our campaign, the first time he got nickelodeon-slimed by an ochre jelly in lost mine of phandelver, the second time he got torn apart by a werewolf on his second day in barovia ✌️💀

[closertotheheartofthesunrise]

in an insane situation where i'm using a custom CSS set to achieve old non twitter tumblr layout and in my excitement to hide the premium popup which covers my bar of posting buttons in the header I accidentally uBlocked my post button clean out of existence

[kakashixhatakesxwhore]

CAN WE GET A ALBUMS YHEY WOULD FUCK WITH PART TWO? any characters u want!!

teehee i didn't know y'all rocked w the first - lmk if i missed anyone, or if you want a girls version/an akatsuki version - thank you so much for the request!! :)

Albums I Think They Would Fuck With 2

They: Choji, Kiba, Shino, Sai, Neji, Lee, Kankuro, Gaara, Shisui, Gai, Asuma, Yamato, Jiraiya

Summary: Which of my fav albums I think each of my fav Naruto men would enjoy the most - also a classic rock recommendation list (if you rock w the character, you'd probably get down to the album)

Fav not here? Try part 1, or send me a request!

Masterlist💿

Choji

Without a Net (Live) by The Grateful Dead

Choji would be soooo salty that he never got to go to a Dead show, because he doesn't think their studio albums hold a candle to their live performances. That said, he would adore the Grateful Dead, without long and experimental their songs are (there's something to appreciate about not having to flip the record for an hour, instead of forty minutes).

Kiba

Pet Sounds by The Beach Boys

Deadass, he would think Pet Sounds is a much better album than Sgt. Pepper, and there is no way to convince him otherwise. Kiba would want to be a Wilson brother.

Shino

Parsley, Sage, Rosemary and Thyme by Simon & Garfunkel

Ugh, so relaxing, so dreamy, and so easy to sing along. Shino would so love this album, because it would relax him in a way that only Si & Garf could.

Sai

Begin Here by The Zombies

Sai would love the shredding vocals and how full the music is, even the sad songs - the lyrics from multiple songs off this album would speak to him on multiple levels.

Neji

Deliver by The Mamas and The Papas

Melancholic but gentle, while still delivering strong, hopeful messages? Yeah, pen Neji down rn.

Lee

Love Grows & Other Gems by Edison Lighthouse

Screaming and crying over this - Lee would be so taken by the love songs, and he'd be whistling the darling melodies all the time. Even the ballads, Lee would be singing so beautifully.

Kankuro

Thirty Three & 1/3 by George Harrison

Would love the jazz, love the symbolism, love George Harrison. Kankuro would find this album chock-full of bangers. Not one of these tunes would be skipped, not until Kankuro has experienced it (he also will turn back the needle if he felt he wasn't appreciating a song properly).

Gaara

The Stranger (Legacy Edition) by Billy Joel

Needs to be the Legacy Edition, because Gaara fucks with the B-side heaviest (y'all need to indulge rn). He literally cries to Billy Joel's voice, and loves to forget about things while he listens to this album.

Shisui

Moving by Peter, Paul and Mary

Happy cries to this album over memories that aren't even his. He wouldn't be able to stop himself from singing along, especially to Puff and Tiny Sparrow.

Gai

Tommy by The Who

He would go an see the live show - and he would think that Tommy was a real person (before he sits down to chew on the possibility of a deaf, dumb, and blind kid being a pinball champion). Gai would still find the spirit of Tommy to be an inspiration and a testament to the power of youth.

Asuma

Physical Graffiti by Led Zeppelin

Hot damn, what is there to say? Asuma would literally wish he was John Bonham (Jimmy Page would be a far too ambitious pick, and he would know that, but never admit it).

Yamato

It Ain't Me Babe by The Turtles

Awe, sweetie!!! He would love this album for the love songs, but tell everyone he loved it for the revolution ballads (also lowk hates the stereo recordings, but finds mono too boring).

Jiraiya

Monty Python Sings by the Monty Python troupe

Oh, he fucks with regular music too, of course. But these. These songs would make him laugh so hard, on top of being so strangely good, and he would fuck with the Monty Python movies so hard.

[raxacoricofallapatorius42]

Random Monty Python-related images that I have saved on my phone 2: ELECTRICAL BOOGALOO

Graham doing cards (as you can see, he is VERY much focussed whilst at the same time is giving a very sleepy yet dreamy face 🥱)

Graham and John as part of the writing team for the show “Doctor in the House”. Gray looking smart and sexy as always, and John wearing Glasses 👓 is SURREAL LIKE OMG

DAAAAAMMMMNNNNN BOOOOOOOYYYYY

EARLY 1970s GROUP SELFIE TTIIIIIIIMMMMMMEEEEEEE (Jonesy’s holding the phone/camera btw)

Carol with a doggo 🐶 <33 (it is very cute <33)

(*RING RING 📞☎️* *RING RING 📞☎️* *in telephone voice* “hello this is your local 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿🏍️BIKER BAD BOY Welshman🏍️🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿 speaking, how may I help you?”)

WINK 😉😁

Mikey (middle) with his costars, Phoebe Nicholls (on the left) and Maggie Smith (on the right), presumably either a cute bts pic or press photo for the film “The Missionary” (1982)

Carol going “WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE 😄😄😄😄😄😄” (honestly that is some skill stretching your legs whilst simultaneously riding a bike 🚲 frfr IM PROUD OF HER FRFR AHHHH-)

well he-LLO THERE MISTER 😏😏😏🤩🤩😍😍

Jonesy with his kids, Sally (left) and Bill (right), honestly how adorable 🥰🥰🥰🥹🥹🥹<33

😐

(It’s giving “Prisoner of War” vibes ngl)

Gray, Mikey, Eric, & Jonesy reading the fanfiction we (the MP fans) write about them be like :

Gray looks so tired and fed up bruh (same bro….same…)

(also this whole picture is me frfr like they capture my internal feelings about taking pictures frfr like AAHAHHHANGSHSGHSG-)

Bro gonna punch you 👊😃😄 (albeit very softly cuz he cares about you <333)

Carol smoking a cigarette 🚬 got me like

DAAAAAAAAMMMMMMMNNNNN 😩😩😩🥰🥰🥰❤️❤️❤️❤️

Michael in Glasses 👓 >>>>>>>>>>>

😁

(This is giving “Best Photo taken by your Mum” vibes ngl)

Not a pic (but a gif) but Eric is fr serving here ngl like DAAAAAMMMNNN >>>>>>>

Brian & His 5 Disciple Pals! (budget cuts meant that 7 other Disciples could not appear in this photoshoot unfortunately)

ok uhh that’s it for today uhh gooooddddbbbyyyyyyyyyyeeeeeeee

(Carol & The Gang in the Shadows)

Thanks !!!!

1 🃏🃏🃏🃏 🥰🥰🥰

2 OMG John looks... young ?😳

3 DAMMMNNNN BOOOYYYY INDEEEEED

4 this smile. This fucking smile

5 so cute wity the colour-matching shirt ❤❤❤

6 Ooooooohhhh Hello hello hello BIKER BAD BOY WELSHMAN

7 *wink wink*(nudge nudge)

8❤❤❤❤ OMG I LOVE THIS PIC (honestly I LOVE Michael's style )

9 an athlete and an ICON LOVE HER

10 Hello hello again welshman bad boy (I think longer hair suited him better though)

11 how ADORABLE ❤❤❤🥰🥰

12 fr it's giving Major Errol Phipps from Ripping yarns

13 I LOVE THIS PIC BECAUSE MP GANG READING FLUIDE GLACIAL 🥰🥰🥰 AND MY BELOVED MARCEL GOTLIB 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰❤❤❤❤RAAAAAH (insert French pride 🇨🇵🇨🇵🇨🇵)

14 Fr he looks so tired (relatable)

15 I don't think he would actually punch me (you can't punch someone with that face )

16 she's giving Marlene Dietrich/old Hollywood movies vibes (GORGEOUS)

17 this is how I want my funerals to be

18 HAHAHA fr the old pic that everyone loves EXCEPT YOU

19 Daaammmmmnnn indeed. (I think we should kill people carrying more than 100 cigarettes ?)

20 the aptly named NOTAPPEARINGINTHISFILM DISCIPLES

21 they look like they're starting a prog-rock band fr

Thank you @yonderghostshistories !<333

[eri-pl]

Ar-Pharazôn's mother

(Lady not-appearing-in-the-canon*, I'll probably devise a name for her soon.)

(Late Numenor, but in terms of things explicitely mentioned we aren't going beyond speculated murder + some emotional abuse. Not a veeery long post, but long enough that it would get the cut even without the TWs.)

So, I was thinking about Pharazôn (as you do).

About how his father was a nasty, opinionated guy hating the Faithful and yet Pharazôn in his youth spent time with Amandil, Elendil, Miriel etc, in Andunie. Why? Who took him there, who let him?

Not his father, obviously, so I assume it must have been his mother. I don't think she was one of the Faithful (his dad probably wouldn't marry her in that case, also I think it would lead to Pharazôn being a better person… maybe?). But I think she was quite neutral on the Faithful-King's Men divide—as neutral as one can be—and was close friends with some of them, probably related to some, and keeping close ties with friends and family was important to her.

Technically Miriel (and, more distantly, amandil) was Gimilkhâd's (Pharazôn's father's) family, but knowing Tolkien's family trees (only first cousins are a clear "nope") I would assume his mother was also related to them somehow. Even if not, she clearly liked them enough to keep strong contacts.

And then she died. Yes, I think she died relatively early.

If she leaned (even socially) towards the Faithful, or simply grew old and Gimilkhâd wanted a younger wife… we're talking late Numenor. There were surely many plants and substances he could have used to make it look natural.

Or she may have died giving birth to a daughter (the daughters and sisters are rarely mentioned even if they exist), which would lead Pharazôn to dislike the idea of having kids in general. (I have some HCs about it but that's another thing).

Or, tbh, it may have been both.

Anyway she died and Gimilkhâd had nobody to stop him from "teaching" his son "proper Númenorean values". Which unfortunately stuck, even after Pharazôn left to Middle Earth to prove himself… I imagine Gimilkhâd as the kind of guy who is never satisfied with his son (think: Oazi to Zuko, kind of, but there's no Azula), and his own upbringing hadn't been great either (think: Azula). It was a whole chain of emotional abuse and expectations.

And then Pharazôn returned and his father was dead but at this point he had internalized enough of the legacy. He chose to make the memory of Gimilkhâd proud, or maybe to prove it wrong. Same thing, in the end.

But the friendships ignited by his mother remained alive until almost the end. Almost.

I wonder if Sauron, when he got to know Pharazôn better, slowly changed his voice, every day making it closer to Gimilkhâd's. OK, I do not wonder. He did. He absolutely did.

*btw Edennill, don't ever watch Monty Python, you'd hate it in more than one way. Probably. Anyway, I do reference it sometimes.

[wonderfulworldofmichaelford]

Is It Really That Bad?

It’s hard to believe nowadays, but there was a time where the Tim Burton/Johnny Depp duo was known for delivering nothing but certified bangers. Edward Scissorhands, Ed Wood, Sleepy Hollow… It was just hit after hit when these two joined forces. But in the mid 2000s, something shifted. It suddenly seemed like people were sick of Burton, sick of Depp, and most of all sick of them working together. Sure, Corpse Bride and Sweeney Todd were still well-liked, but once Alice in Wonderland hit theaters people weren’t shy about voicing their dislike of the director and especially the actor. Burton kind of skidded to a halt for a while, while Depp just kept making increasingly worse movies with Disney and generally not doing anything worthwhile after Rango, and while Alice was the breaking point, the cracks started to show in 2005 with a little film called Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.

An attempt to redo Roald Dahl’s novel about a precocious child touring the candy factory of a wacky candymaker was being planned for a long time, with even Nicolas Cage in talks at one point to be Wonka, and at another point good ol’ Martin Scorcese was attached to direct. But things just kept falling through until Burton got dragged in, and from there he proceeded to get things done and talk the studio out of stupid decisions like killing off Charlie’s dad and making Wonka a parental figure. Ah, but speaking of Wonka, that crucial role needed filling, and it seemed a lot of famous actors were considered for the role by the studio—Robin Williams, Patrick Stewart, Michael Keaton, Steve Martin, Bill Murray, Christopher Walken, Brad Pitt, Leslie Nielsen, Robert De Niro, Will Smith, Mike Meyers, Ben Stiller, pretty much every living member of Monty Python left at the time, Adam Sandler, and Marilyn Manson among them according to TVTropes—and Burton had an interesting idea for his second pick to play the guy:

But instead he went for his first pick, someone who’s actually very similar to Marilyn Manson in a lot of ways! Good ol’ reliable JD himself! Surely this was gonna bring in the big bucks! And... it did! It's the highest-grossing adaptation of one of Dahl's works ever, and Burton's second highest-grossing film!

Critics seemed mostly fine with it, but audiences were a lot more divided. Some people liked that it was a new and different take on the story that stayed a lot more true to the book than the beloved 1971 Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory (a movie that Dahl famously hated as much as he did Jewish people, so frankly who gives a shit about his opinion), while others clung to the nostalgia of the Gene Wilder Wonka and treated this new film like a war crime. How dare they remake their favorite movie, even though this isn't a remake, it's just a different adaptation of the same book!

So yes, this movie isn’t the most reviled film out there, but it definitely is incredibly divisive, and what’s more I distinctly recall even as a child being aware of the attitude towards Depp and Burton shifting towards the more negative when this film came out. So I figured it was a high time I see about revisiting it and find out if this second cinematic outing into Wonka’s factory was really that bad, or if it genuinely was a work of impure imagination.

THE GOOD

It may surprise you to hear that this film actually does a few things better than the 1971 film. This is especially evident in the four shitty children touring the factory with Charlie.

The ones from Willy Wonka were, to put it bluntly, dull and forgettable, and came off as far too sympathetic in regards to their fate because none of them aside from Veruca Salt showcased any terrible traits that would lead to them deserving their punishments. In this film, all these kids are assholes, so watching them fall prey to the karmic justice of Wonka's factory is all the more satisfying. We also get to see what happens to them after they get out, which is kind of funny. I’m not gonna pretend that they made them the deepest and most complex characters ever, but with how they updated them and with the young actors they got to portray them, they managed to inject a bit more life into them than you’d expect.

This movie also fixes Grandpa Joe, who is pretty infamous to fans of the '71 film as a total asshole who constantly encourages Charlie to steal and just in general seems like a massive burden to his family. Here, he actually is every bit the sweet old grandpa that you’d expect, and his motivations for wanting to go on the tour are a lot nicer and more sympathetic. He also never tries to push Charlie into a life of crime, which is nice.

Of course, the very best aspect of this movie is Deep motherfucking Roy. He’s the second best dwarf actor out there, only oovershadowed by Warwick “Leprechaun” Davis, and much like Davis was in Star Wars as the ultimate Glup Shitto—Droopy McCool.

And in this film he gets the incredible honor of being every single fucking Oompa-Loompa there is, and he is clearly having a blast and busting his ass. He had no prior dancing experience, but you could not tell with how he’s pulling off all these sick moves while spitting out diss tracks for children like he’s Blood on the Dance Floor. He really is the single best actor in the movie, and that’s not to slander anyone else—Roy is just that good. Like we have a scene-stealing minor role for Christopher Lee as Wonka’s dad, a crabby dentist who hates candy, and as amazing as he is Roy still is better. You better respect this man.

Speaking of men to respect: Danny Elfman. Taking lyrics straight from the book and weaving a unique style for each kid—Big Bollywood spectacle for Augustus (that was Roy’s idea), 70s funk for Violet, psychedelic rock for Veruca, and hard rock for Mike—the songs are all genuinely great and fun to listen to. I’d never go as far as to say they’re more iconic than the Oompa-Loompa tracks from the ‘71 film, but I think they function better as songs, and the fact each of them has their own distinct style to set them apart from each other was the right way to go. I do think Mike’s song is the weakest of the bunch, feeling a lot messier than the other three, but it’s not unbearably awful or anything.

THE BAD

The biggest issue with the film is that the two most important characters—Charlie and Wonka—fucking suck.

Let’s start with Charlie. Now, to be clear, I’m not putting any blame on Freddie Highmore—he was literally a child, and even then I think he’s doing his damndest to make Charlie cute and whimsical. The issue here is definitely on the writers, who saw fit to stuff him full of all the syrupy sweet Tiny Tim-esque kind-hearted poor child cliches but forgot to impart a personality to go with them. Charlie is, to put it bluntly, a boring and generic nice guy, and one who ends up feeling like a living plot device to further Wonka’s character development, something that feels especially egregious when his name is literally in the title.

And now let’s talk about Wonka. Boy, is there a lot to unpack with this guy.

Literally everything about this take on Wonka is incredibly awkward and off-putting. The most infamous aspect of him is definitely the look; with his pale skin and dorky haircut he looked a lot like Michael Jackson, who at the time the film came out was going through a very serious scandal where he was accused of doing awful things to children in his big rich guy mansion… which is essentially the plot of this film when you think about it.

But that’s just an unfortunate coincidence! It’s an ugly look, sure, but a good performance could make it palatable, and this was Johnny Depp during his big post-Jack Sparrow renaissance working together with the guy who helped put him on the map. Surely he wouldn’t deliver an incredibly awkward, cringey, and insufferable performance that dials up all his acting quirks to annoying levels, right?

Here’s the thing: On paper, Depp’s Wonka is honestly not that different than Wilder’s. They’re both weird, quirky, reclusive confectioners with a not-so-hidden disdain for the kids touring their factory and snarky, condescending attitudes. What it all comes down to is the presentation, and to show you what I mean I’m going to use the most batshit comparison you’ve ever seen:

Burton’s Wonka is very similar to Zack Snyder’s Ozymandias.

“Now hold on, Michael,” I hear you exclaiming in utter bewilderment, “how are these two comparable? I know that both are fine with the wonton murder of children if it helps achieve their goals and that a lot of people are weirdly horny for them, but how is this a good comparison?” Well luckily I’m not trying to compare a mass-murdering anti-villain to a quirky chocolatier in terms of character, but in how the adaptation drops the ball with how they’re presented by removing the more warm and positive aspects of them. In Alan Moore’s comic, Adrian Veidt is essentially a relentlessly charming gigachad, an affable and approachable fellow who seems beneath suspicion because he exudes a traditionally heroic warmth. In the movie, however, Snyder chose to portray Veidt as a cold, distant twink who doesn’t seem particularly approachable at all (another case of Daddy Zaddy tragically missing Moore’s point).

This same "missing the point" issue plagues Wonka. Yes, Wilder’s take is just as much a smug asshole reveling in the comeuppance the children are receiving, but he also has a genuine warmth to him which is codified perfectly with him singing “Pure Imagination.” Sure, he’s perfectly willing to traumatize everyone with a demented boat ride shortly after, but Wilder’s performance and the presentation of his Wonks help sell him as a quirky genius who is more likable than insufferable, and you really understand how despite being kind of a dick he is also a beloved figure.

Depp’s Wonka fails as the character in the same basic ways that the movie version of Veidt does: He's a condescending, cold, openly rude, guy who is just genuinely unpleasant to be around despite the movie really trying hard to make him likable and relatable, to the point where unlike Wilder's take it's hard to grasp why this guy gets any respect from anyone. He’s like the proto-Rick Sanchez, except he’s not even particularly funny to make up for it. Maybe this take is more accurate to the book, but if it is it’s really just proof that taking liberties when adapting really is for the best.

And this failure is only compounded by the movie piling on a tragic backstory for Wonka. Yes, Christopher Lee is great, but there is genuinely no need to pile on a traumatic childhood and weird daddy issues to Willy Wonka. The character works best as this weird, trickster mentor figure who dishes out karma to the naughty kids and ultimately rewards the good egg of the bunch. Trying to bring a guy with a magical factory full of dwarfs who do choreographed diss tracks every time a kid falls into the incinerator down to earth and make him relatable is just a mind-boggling decision.

These are really the only two issues with the film that stand out as excessively bad, but… you see the problem, right? The titular character and the owner of the titular chocolate factory are both bad. One’s a living prop, the other is just an obnoxious asshat who is given unneeded character development that ends up falling flat, and while this would be easy to ignore if they were side characters it’s impossible to let slide since they are the main fucking characters. The whole film revolves around the two very worst things in it, and no matter how good the other stuff in the movie is these elements alone drag it down a lot.

IS IT REALLY THAT BAD?

Look, I’m not going to pretend like this is a great film. If it really is closer to Dahl’s book, all it managed to do is convince me to never read it and solidified my belief that being pragmatic when adapting books to screen is the way to go. It’s also really easy to see how the Burton-Depp fatigue came about, as this is some of the weakest work in both of their filmographies.

But I still feel like there’s plenty to like here. The songs, the bratty kids, Deep motherfucking Roy, it’s all genuinely good shit! There was never a chance it was going to be iconic as the Wilder film, but it’s disingenuous to write it off entirely when it does a lot good things (and a few things better than the '71 version). A lot of people are nostalgic for this one these days, as it's the one this generation grew up with, and honestly? I can't really blame them entirely. It's a decent enough movie, and I honestly think that score it has up there is pretty fair. It's certainly a mixed bag but when it actually succeeds at being charming it does it in its own unique way rather than trying to ape the beloved classic that came before it, and I do respect it for that.

And hey, if Johnny Depp's worst and most annoying movie role is in a movie I'd still say is okay, that's a good thing right? He couldn't possibly ever take a role more cringeworthy and annoying than Wonka in a film that's genuinely shitty, right?

Right?

RIGHT?!

[commonguttersnipe]

Rank every Monty Python song out of 10 and give reasons why for your ranking them as it is please?

Always Look On The Bright Side Of Life- 10/10 (just a classic)

Knights Of The Round Table- 7/10 (I appreciate the commitment to character)

The Silly Walk Song- 7/10 (It itches my brain the right way)

I Bet You They Won’t Play This Song On The Radio- 10/10 (my favourite!)

Galaxy Song- 11/10 (It always makes me feel good on a rough day… ironically)

I Like Chinese- 6/10 (the O2 one is the best)

The Penis Song- 3/10 (ew.)

Sit On My Face- 9/10 (strangely romantic?)

Do What John- 5/10 (so is John going to do anything?)

Lousy Song- 0/10 (not really a song. heck, Graham says in the song itself that it’s appalling)

Lumberjack Song- 10/10 (I CAN TREAT YOU BETTER BEVIS)

Here Comes Another One- 7/10 (I don’t think I’ve laughed harder at a song)

Rainy Day In Berlin- 5/10 (nothing too special about this one)

Bruce’s Philosopher Song- 10/10 (constantly gets stuck in my head)

I’m Still So Worried- 9/10 (I’m now starting to think Terry and I were very similar people)

Muddy Knees- 6/10 (extra points for crooning)

Never Be Rude To An Arab- 7/10 (I also think we should blow up racists!)

Rudyard Kipling- 8/10 (Just a vibe)

Henry Kissinger- 6/10 (weird crush but sure)

Every Sperm Is Sacred- 10/10 (I actually listened to this when I went condom shopping. good times.)

Eric The Half A Bee- 8/10 (why is John so adorable singing this?!?)

Brian Song- 10/10 (never been more pumped up by an opening credits)

The Meaning Of Life- 8/10 (Eric screaming at us about existence 👍)

Blackmail/Nudge Rap- 10/10 (slaps for absolutely no reason at all)

Spam- spam/spam (spam)

Medical Love Song- 8/10 (Graham really pulled out every std he knew)

Money Song- 7/10 (*James A Janisse voice* BUSINESS)

Finland- 12/10 (it’s the place where he quite wants to be!)

Christmas In Heaven- 8/10 (heaven sounds pretty cool…)

I’ve got two legs- 5/10 (he sure does!)

Oliver Cromwell- 6/10 (ugh)

[hoodoo12]

Two show Wednesday

"Two show Tuesday" sounds better, but the travel plans didn't work out that way.

I saw a play and a musical. Dracula: A Comedy of Terrors and Spamalot. Mild spoilers under the cut (mostly for Spamalot).

Dracula was in an off Broadway production in a theater of ~250 seats. It was nice to be in such an intimate theater; even though we were fourth row the stage was so much closer because there was no pit. I loved the set design! They did a lot with a little. The show was a tight 90 minutes so there was no lag time or dragging out the plot. Out of the five actors, four of them played multiple roles, sometimes in the same scene!

Because the show was short and a comedy, I'd call it Dracula-lite or Cliffs Notes Dracula lol. There were changes to some backstories and genderswapping, and Dracula had a change of heart at the end. There were puppets, a bat on a stick, lots of black lace well-cut men, and every actor did an absolutely bangup job with the comedy.

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Dracula, A Comedy Of Terrors (@draculacomedy)

Before it was a stage show, it was a radio drama -- oops, podcast. The podcast starred a ton of stars: Christopher Sieber, John Stamos, Annaleigh Ashford, Laura Benanti, Alex Brightman, James Monroe Iglehart, Richard Kind, Rob McClure, Ashley Park, Alan Tudyk, Kathy Fitzgerald, Jeff Kready, and Orville Mendoza.

Listen to it here: Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or Broadway Podcast Network.

Second show was Spamalot! I was excited to see the differences between the Kennedy Center and Broadway.

The sets were slightly different: bigger, flashier, with an expensive looking forest. If you know, you know, lol. Some lines were changed but nothing drastic. God was Steve Martin, which is apropos. It was Leslie Kritzer's first night back after being sick; she made reference to that and her improv game is top notch.

Ethan Slater was great. The person I went with said they could hear his Spongebob voice when he sang as Prince Herbert but I didn't hear that (I laugh too hard at those scenes because they're my favorite). The person sitting to my other side had never seen the show or knew much about Monty Python (apparently) and he was INTO IT. I loved that he enjoyed it so much and some of it took him by surprise.

I really enjoyed Taran Killan. He made Sir Lancelot his own versus aping was Alex Brightman did and it worked. His French Taunter also got huge laughs because he dragged some of it out to an awkward amount of time but got the audience into it, which brought it back around to funny again. You know Justin Collette's outrageously long scream when Lydia heads into the Netherworld? Increase that time by about two minutes and that's what Killan did during one specific part of the scene. His costume for "His Name is Lancelot" was also different with many more bedazzled flames, lol

Good quick trip with good shows!

ps: We stopped at a random cafe before Spamalot and David Josefsburg was there! I tagged him on my IG and he dmed me back, lol

[roseofithaca]

The Forgotten Ones

(Just some angsty venting with my ocs Silver and Robin's ghost-cub Kya, and a surprisingly good therapist).

"Feel better?"

Silver nearly jumped out of skin at the voice, Kya letting out a tiny squeak as her hands gripped the pup extra tight.

"Sorry! Sorry. Didn't mean to spook." Humphrey apologised, his head lying on its side beneath the bed.

Steadying her breathing, Silver soothed both Kya and herself by stroking the cub's velvety soft ears.

"You've been there the whole time?"

"Well...yeah. I didn't wanna disturb ya, love. Seemed like you wanted to be alone...more or less. And I couldn't exactly quietly shuffle out, so...."

"You just thought you'd enjoy the show?" She accused.

Humphrey went quiet.

He'd been stuck in that room since the early hours of the morning, having skidded across the landing and through the walls after being accidentally kicked by Kitty as she'd excitedly dashed to the ballroom.

Eight hours of boredom, meditation, then more boredom, then replaying his favourite Monty Python sketches in his head, followed by more boredom had passed. Then his solitude had been interrupted by the sound of a screaming match from the other end of the house, followed by Silver entering the room that was now mostly used by Robin but had once been shared between him and their dearly departed peasant farmer.

As he'd been about to sigh in relief and call her attention over so he could finally be picked up before that rather large spider got too close to his nose, the girl had collapsed onto the floor.

She was crying. Distraught, even.

Tucking her legs up to her front, she'd huddled close to the window and wrapped her arms around herself. No. Humphrey squinted and saw that she wasn't alone. Kya was nestled against the black fabric of Silver's boob tube, the Neo Pagan stroking her tiny head as she rocked herself back and forth.

Once again, Humphrey opened his mouth to ask if she was okay. Then he heard what she was muttering.

"Artemis, Diana, Luna light, take away my endless plight. Artemis, Diana, Luna light, take away my endless plight."

She repeated the chant, the mantra, over and over, her eyes staring out into nothing.

It broke Humphrey's heart to see her this way. True, he'd never been as close to her as Mary or Robin or Kitty. But she was one of the few who made an effort to always pick him up when she found him. And he admired her usually positive outlook even if she did seem to have her head in the clouds, or rather the stars. Same as the caveman really, just with better speech and body odor.

It was rare that smile ever seemed to leave her face, even less so to see her cry. He thinks this might be the first, at least for him. More than ever, she looked like a child.

And the way she was praying for comfort to whatever was troubling her....reminded him of Her.

His twelve year old wife gritting her teeth and clutching at her rosary, mumbling a hundred Hail Mary's as she knelt on the hardwood floor. Even then, when he was only a kid himself, he knew she was praying to be taken away from this place. Away from him.

Humphrey knew it was wrong to be watching. Sophie had taught him that well enough the last time. But he didn't really have a choice this time. Sure, he could close his eyes but not his ears.

He left her to her pray. Let her seek comfort in her faith and the texture of Kya's fur. Only when her breathing had evened out and she'd quietened down, did he speak.

And nearly gave her a heart attack it seems.

"Again, sorry. Just wanted to leave you to it. I know this room is important to ya."

Silver sat on the windowsill, the wolf cub stretching her paws up against her nape.

"S'fine."

He'd never heard her sound so quiet.

"D'you wanna talk-?"

Silver shook her head.

"No, no, that's fine. No worries. If you want me to sod off, feel free to toss me out the door. Preferably not the window though, if you don't mind, if I land in that rosebush I'm gonna be stick chatting to hedgehogs for a week, haha."

She didn't seem to react. It was almost as if he were talking to a doll. Or a living.

"Someone upset you?"

The young woman shrugged.

A yes, then. Right?

"I'm sure you could set Robin on them if you wanted-."

She looked at him, a hardened edge to her blue eyes, red raw from crying.

...Oh.

"Wait. 'Weren't Robin the one who upset you, was it?"

Another shrug. But this time she spoke, her voice croaky.

"He didn't say anything. He was running around with Julian, playing pranks on Mike, winding him up." She explained; "I found Kya in the kitchen. She was all alone. The others were all upstairs. Someone had just left her there...when I asked who saw her last, they all said Robin had put her there before going off with Julian..."

"Oh, I know that feeling."

Silver sniffled as Kya whimpered against her. She rocked her gently, turning to look out the window.

Out towards the woods. Her bed. Her room, or close as can be. All the way across the field.

"I found Robin and just...started screaming at him. How could he just leave her? She's just a baby. She's blind, she's helpless, she can't even crawl far on her own!" Silver cried; "He calls himself her dad but then just abandons her when there's something more fun to do..."

Humphrey didn't think that sounded entirely accurate. Robin had carried that cub in his furs for as long as he'd known him and rarely was she ever just dumped like people did to him.

"What did he say?" He prompted.

"That he only meant to leave her for a few minutes, he was gonna be running and jumping a lot and didn't want her being disturbed. I said he should have given her to Kitty or someone but apparently they'd been in the kitchen at the time and also left...so I ended up screaming at all of them."

"Right." That explains the earthquake earlier.

"....And then my chest became really tight and the room was spinning. I couldn't breathe. I couldn't think. I knew it didn't make sense to get that upset but I just couldn't stop screaming. And they were all looking at me like....like..."

"Like a stranger?"

When she met his gaze, he knew he'd hit the nail on the head.

"How d'you know that?" She asked.

"You ain't the only one who's lost your temper."

"Really? You?"

"Going on five hundred years here! I know I might seem like Mr. Cool and Collected but I can be pushed to the limit as well." He stated.

At that, Silver got off the windowsill. Tucking Kya into her front pocket, she scooped Humphrey's head off the floor and placed him on the duvet before sitting crosslegged beside him.

"Oh, much better, thank you very much." The Tudor smiled; "It's not just Kya you were upset for, was it?"

The Pagan wiped her eyes.

"I never really noticed it much when Mary was here. But ever since..." She bit her lip, the wound still raw. Humphrey wished he could pat her hand; "I wake up and for me no time had past. A month ago was yesterday. But so much has happened. And usually I love listening to what I need to catch up on. But there's things I can't. Like when I notice Cap and Kitty have somehow gone from her hating how bossy he is to him suddenly acting like her dad. Or the secret jokes between Robin and Julian I'll never get. Or just...those little moments that make them all feel connected. Like a family."

"It makes you feel like an outsider looking in, hmm? I mean I live here and I get that."

Silver let out a half laugh, half cry.

"We need to start hanging out more."

"We do." He agreed; "Think it will do us both not to bottle things up have someone to talk to. Someone who gets it. And who, unlike one of us three here, can talk back. No offense, Kya."

The cub let out the tiniest mewl and Silver nearly smiled, holding her beneath her chin.

"Good to have someone who cares." She mumbled.

"Ey, come on. We all care about you, love. Especially Robin, he adores you."

"He's not here though, is he? He didn't come to check on me? Or Kya."

"Maybe he knew you wanted your space. I mean, you didn't exactly invite me in. He worries about you though. He told me himself."

"Why?"

"Well. When you go off hiding like this and when your mood seems to shift so quick but you don't tell us what's wrong. Not having a go, I'm just saying. He knows it ain't...normal. Your situation. The whole time perspective has to be a headache for you."

She didn't reply, just looked at her hands.

"You don't need to try to hide it behind a smile for us, Silver, darlin'. It's only gonna get worse that way. And Robin knows better than any of us, ghost brains can be as fragile as livings. I've had to talk him through some pretty dark moments of his."

"So you all think I'm a nutcase?" She scoffed.

"Not sure that's the PC term, but no. Just that...you run the risk of losing your grip on everything if you don't let people help. That fair?"

Silence. A long, thoughtful stare at the cub in her hands.

"Yes, Humphrey, that makes sense, you're so wise and handsome! And oh thank you Miss. Ravenstar-."

"Piss off." Silver snorted, nudging him over with a light push of her knuckles.

He let himself topple, just glad to get a smile out of her, reluctant as it was.

Again. Just like Sophie.

"....Okay. Fine. Sometimes I do feel like I'm losing it. Like I dunno where I am or rather when I am...I feel like the world is passing by without me and no one...No one really cares if I get left behind." A tear leaked from her eyes.

"Oh, sweetheart. I'm sorry. You always seemed like your dreams made you so happy."

"They do. But they're still just dreams. You guys...this...It's the only reality I've got. And most of the time it feels less a part of me than where I go to when I'm asleep. And sometimes when it gets so bad and I feel so left out that I go to sleep wishing...."

Humphrey blinked; "Wishing what?"

"...That I won't wake up the next month. Or the next. Or ever again."

Somewhere, wherever his stupid body was stumbling about, he imagined it was stumbling from that blow to his chest.

"You know we'd all be in bits if that happened, right?" Not Moving On. Just forever cursed to sleep in Purgatory.

She shrugged; "You'd get over it. You'd move on."

"Silver."

The teen got off the bed and wiped her eyes.

"I should go find Robin. I'm sure he feels bad enough by now and Kya wants her dad, for all his faults." She sounded so flat. Dejected.

"Silver, love, sit down-."

"Thanks for the talk. I'm glad someone else understands. Or...actually I'm not because it sucks that anyone should feel this way. But I'm glad I know I've got someone to talk to..."

Humphrey sighed; "Of course, sweetheart. Anytime. But please, wait-."

"If I see your body around, I'll lead it up here." She took a breath and plastered that cheery smile on her face before walking towards the door. "C'mon, Kya. Back to the show."

Humphrey watched the girl leave, cursing the God he'd stopped believing in for giving her such a cruel curse to live with in death.

[allthemusic]

Week ending: 12th July

Well, we got to our first EP, the All Star Hit Parade (EP), credited to "Various artists". This is sufficiently vague that I can't seem to find a version of it, and in any case, I have no intention of covering EPs. My blog, them's the rules. Which still leaves us with...

I'm Walking Backward for Christmas - The Goons (double A-side, peaked at Number 4)

The Goons! I didn't actually know all that much about these guys, before listening to this, except that they were a 1950s British comedy troupe who did mostly radio comedy? They had a show called The Goon Show, and I know it heavily influenced Monty Python and just about every other act coming out of that same slightly daft/surreal British comedy tradition.

So yes, I'm expecting comedy here - which maybe explains the otherwise out of place title? We're about as far from Christmas as you can get, but I think you can get away with that if you're doing a comedy thing. This was a song that apparently was originally sung by Spike Milligan on the Goon Show during a writers' strike, and he's got a pretty legendary rep.

That said, I don't actually think I get this song? It starts with some very fast, chaotic big band jazz, but then cuts rapidly from that to a very nasal, annoying voice singing about how Across the Irish Sea, / I'm walking backwards for Christmas. Apparently sideways and forwards doesn't work, as people just look at me / And say it's a publicity stunt. Which... huh? I just don't fundamentally get what's funny or why that works as a joke, I don't think.

Anyway, we get a brief sketch of an Irish lad who falls in love with a girl, and he's apparently walking backwards across the sea for the sake of this girl? But again, I don't really followthe logic of the song. And my good will towards it - what little I had - is absolutely used up by the repeat of the first chorus bit, when the already nasal voice starts to sound a little bit like a buzzing fly, and gains a chorus of people making weird "ooooooh" groaning noises in the back. It's giving me a headache, just in time for the loud swing to return, and then some random piano thumping.

Yeah, I don't like this song much. I wanted to, but nope.

Bluebottle Blues - The Goons (double A-side, 4)

Oh boy. If I was irritated by the buzzing-fly sound on the last track, how much more so will I be annoyed here, on a track that is literally named for a type of fly?

Okay, there's a lot of speaking at the start of this, and I'm really not doing great at following the plot of it all. I don't know if people were just better at following radio conversations in the 1950s, or if I'm just personally bad at it, or if the recording quality that I'm listening to isn't helping, or if these were characters and voices people benefitted from knowing ahead of time? Because Bluebottle, it turns out, far from being a fly, is a recurring Goon Show character, a sort of irritating Boy Scout from East Finchley. Except I can't quite get a handle on what the joke is with him, except that he's irritating?

I know a lot of comedy is just "look at this irritating character", but this one really feels thin on the ground. He just gets tricked by the other unnamed character, which gives him the eponymous blues, except that basically is just him singing - in a not massively bluesy style - about how he doesn't like being the butt of various slapstick jokes and mischief. Which is not famously a genre of comedy that works in an audio format.

Yeah, I'm very irritated by this one too. The voices are minorly more palatable, but only minor, and I don't even manage to be charmed by the bit at the end where a man starts singing about walking backwards for Christmas, only to remark Oh no, that's the other side, isn't it? which is normally the sort of detail I'd eat up with a spoon. Grrrrr.

Okay, I am absolutely not going to name a favourite here. Not least beacuse it's so clearly a comedy record, and not a song. You can't sing along to this, half of it is spoken, and it relies heavily on you knowing the characters and context for the jokes. I wanted to enjoy this as a bit of silly fun, but it really didn't click. Sorry!

Least amusing song of the bunch: I'm Walking Backwards for Christmas

[living-d3ad-gh0ul]

Tuesday 17th October 2023, 02:45am

I really should be asleep right now. But I can't seem to get comfortable and when I do, my brain just won't shut up. So here I am, writing to you. I've been thinking about you a lot lately. I don't know why. I think I've been missing you a bit. Is it strange to miss you? I don't know. I'm sorry if it is.

I really hope your blood tests came back okay and everything is all well with your health. Do you know when you'll have surgery yet? I was thinking about that the other day and hoping I hadn't missed it, so I could wish you good luck for it. I'm really glad to hear that you've found a job you can do that will turn into a career too and that you can get the training for it. Has that happened yet? Or are you still waiting?

I knew you were thinking of leaving the band, and that's okay. If it's ran it's course for you, then I'm sure your bandmates will be understanding, especially if they're your friends. I really hope the last two shows went well and that you enjoyed playing them at least and I hope the last show you do next month is good too. Will it be near your birthday? Because I know that's coming up really soon too. It's the week after I get back from another comic con, I go away on 17th November and come home on the 19th, so I'm just gone for the weekend. This time it's in Wales, I've only been there once when I was a kid.

Aw no poor Chonky :( I really really hope she's okay now. It sucks when our pets get sick, because they don't have a voice to tell you exactly what's wrong, so it can be pretty worrying. It's a good job that owners can usually tell though when something's wrong and what it could be, because they know their pet well. But it sounds like you did the right thing for her and I hope she's feeling much better now. I'm sure she loved having you look after her and care for her and make sure she was all okay.

Don't worry about streaming and stuff, you can come back to it whenever you feel like it, whenever you have the time. I look forward to the next time you do, I've missed chilling in your chat and just.. hanging out. I liked it before. I actually was playing some of the Cyberpunk DLC myself the other week, it was quite fun haha. But I definitely think I need to start upgrading my PC soon. Definitely a new fan and CPU and maybe a secondary SSD. I would upgrade my GPU but those are so expensive and my 1080 still serves me well at the moment.

I'm sorry it's been a little bit since I last wrote, I've just been busy with work mostly. I haven't had much going on or much exciting happening. Apart from going over to Belfast to surprise my best friend, that was quite cool. We went to another convention, I just booked a flight and a hotel and turned up. She had no clue I was coming and was really surprised when I got there haha. I literally just went over for like.. 24 hours. I'd felt bad cause I had to cancel a trip to go see her at the end of this month just due to work and not being able to get the holidays and stuff. So I was pretty upset and just wanted to do something kinda.. fun and spontaneous? Idk

Ian Somerhalder walked by me too and didn't even notice it, it wasn't until my best friend pointed him out and I was like "oh shit" hahaha. But I was more excited about Peter Facinelli and Jackson Rathbone from Twilight, I used to love that when I was like.. 14. I would have met Ian and Paul too, but it was far too expensive for me. Maybe some day I will. I recently started watching The Vampire Diaries again, since it's spooky season and all and I haven't watched it for years. So I've went right back to the start, I'm at the end of season 1 right now where Isobel is in it (I hate Isobel. And I fucking hate John Gilbert too)

It was also my dad's birthday on 8th October. That was a pretty hard day. I was quite sad and upset all day, but I watched a lot of my dad's favourite programs and stuff and tried to distract myself. Red Dwarf, Monty Python, The Mighty Boosh (which me and my dad actually started watching together) and some Billy Connolly. I also listened to some of his favourite music too. And I got a clootie dumpling from a local bakery (it's like a Christmas pudding kind of but not as rich), coincidentally it was the same bakery me and my dad and grandma and grandpa would go to, it was just down the street from my grandma's house. My grandma used to make him one for his birthday every year when he was a kid, instead of a birthday cake because it was cheaper. And he loved it. It was one of his favourite things. He'd always ask me to bring him some down when I'd go down and visit him in Nottingham, because you can't really get it anywhere in England and to make a proper one yourself, it's a bit of a pain and really easy to mess up if you don't do certain things right lol. When he was in the nursing home, I remember one day the chef had came to talk to him and asked him about food he liked and stuff. He was telling me that they'd asked him what kind of birthday cake he wanted and my dad immediately asked if he could have a dumpling. The chef agreed and said they absolutely could do that and I remember my dad being so so happy. His face was just.. completely lit up, big wide smiles, all excited. I think that's what made me extra sad, because he had been so excited for his birthday and his dumpling. He really liked the simple things in life, honestly.

So even though he wasn't here, he got his dumpling. I went out early on the Saturday morning and picked it up, had a chat with the guy who owns the bakery (who actually weirdly recognised me and asked me who my family were, so I told him and he immediately remembered me from when I was a kid, telling me about how he remembered I'd come in with my grandma to get the rolls and the papers, how I'd come in with my dad for a yum yum or a strawberry tart lol. I unfortunately had to break the news of my dad's passing to him, he didn't know. And he was quite sympathetic. He was a nice guy, just as friendly as I remembered when I was a kid. I'll attach a picture of the dumpling to this so you can see. I stuck a candle in it and everything for him. Sang him happy birthday and cried while doing so. But I knew he'd be nearby. I knew he'd be standing right behind me hugging me while I did. God just writing this is making me tear up a little bit.

I've started some grief counselling too. I think they are really helping me. I'm getting it through the hospice who helped with dad's end of life care, even though the were only involved for.. well a few days.. they've given me more support that some family have (my mother included. I'm still at odds with her. She's done more horrible and nasty shit since we last spoke and.. honestly I'm just seeing her for her true colours now, realising that I've been gaslit, emotionally neglected and manipulated by her for a very long time). My boss has been more than happy to allow me to attend these sessions, because they know in the long run it's going to help me and isn't going to affect my performance at work or anything. I'm actually doing really well at work at the moment, even considering that it is incredibly stressful and emotionally/mentally taxing at times, but I've had nothing but good reports in my weekly catch ups with my manager so far. So I think it's safe to say they can see that I am more than capable of doing the job. I just wanna try get through my probation and then move to a different department. Something that doesn't involve talking to customers lol.

Gran also got out of hospital, which is a good thing. She's back home and still resting and stuff, trying to get her strength back. She was in there for like.. just over a month. Unfortunately we don't think shes gonna be able to get any more chemo though, which sucks. But we're hoping her oncologist will still be able to do surgery for her, we just have to keep trying to get her strength up and make sure she's eating well and we're getting her walking and stuff. Even if it's just to the kitchen and back or around the garden. Small steps. It hopefully will make a big difference. I've been making sure to go see her at least once a week, even just for a couple hours at the very least.

I don't have much else going on right now. It's just work and looking forward to next month when I go to Wales. I don't think I have anything incredibly exciting planned for Halloween, which sucks, but I'll be working this year unfortunately. Maybe I can just relax and watch some spooky movies after work, eat some terrible sweets and enjoy myself a little. Oh and I'm on some new medication too actually, I'm not sure if it's working yet, I don't feel anything different. This is for a physical thing, not a mental thing. But it's nothing too serious, just something I need to like.. manage symptoms of.

I really hope you're doing well, E. I hope everything's going good and that your health is good and Chonky is good and work is starting and surgery is getting scheduled and all the good things. I know it must be getting warmer there too, because it's definitely getting fucking colder here haha. I've been absolutely frozen in the mornings for a couple days now, until I turn the heat on again and warm up. I think it's gonna be a reaaaaally cold winter this year which is unfortunate.

I really hope to hear from you soon. And I hope I've got more exciting things to tell you next time.

N x

"I saw you in a dream then it came to an end, I wonder if you'll come visit me again"

(the selfie was me at the con in Northern Ireland. It was SO fucking hot, I was boiling all day. But I still looked cute I think.. maybe haha)

[pacificglovebox]

Just gonna consolidate my answers here :3

I'm adding some Content Warnings in the tags and next to the specific responses so please be forewarned before you read ahead

Part One

History (Especially Ancient Roman and Gaelic)

Two Brothers one older and one younger (I'm the middle sibling)

Egg Noodles with Chicken served over mashed potatos with Green Peas and Carrots (family dish at every holiday)

CW: Surgery... I'm gonna change my answer from before... I forget about this sometimes because it still pulls me back in to the moment... but when I was like 17/18 I think my mom went in for brain surgery to relieve some symptoms of Chiari Malformation (tldr of it the brain is too big and enters through spinal canal and *can* create issues - techniclaly i have it too but even if im having symptoms thats for older me to deal with i cannot handle it now) on that morning mom was taken back to be prepped for surgery and I got a call from my older brother who couldn't join us at the hospital since he had just finished an overnight shift at work and he needed to hear how she was doing... I remember that hallway I was in as i talked on the phone with him, the sound of the elevators, and the worry in his voice and mine it was truly one of the hardest days for me so far... all we could do was hope and pray the surgery was a success (spoiler: it was and my Mom is doing better these days but still has lifelong medical issues that are being managed)

5 Foot 10 Inches (I think it's been a whole since I've measured)

Being a Friend to my friends, Writing Poetry, Reading, Watching Movies and TV, honestly I'm into most things

Part Two (electric boogaloo)

25 years old

I have loved friends & family and I think I've loved some people romantically

White Chocolate it makes my tummy less mad (I know it's just Coco Butter but I consider it chocolate)

Share me whatever you want :3 Part of loving friends to me is to enjoy what friends and besties are passionate about and it makes me love others more when they are authentically themselves

Part Five Three (do you like my Monty Python and the Holy Grail reference?)

Yes my parents are still together they've been together my whole life and I don't see them splitting up as both rely on eachother to help each other for medical assistance

I'll answer this from the point of view of what I would like my obituary to say if I died today (little somber but I think it best answers the question)... I want it to say I was a great friend to those who know me and that I loved everyone who knew me

I don't really view that many things as a disappointment, something about my point of view helps me see everything as a learning experience... if I had to say something it is that I might be that soon I plan to give up on working toward my professional license because it's too hard at the current moment... I am trying not to feel shame at leaning this direction but the world of professional accounting licensing is especially difficult for neurodivergent me and I want to let go of some stress in my life

I love both but if I were have one as a pet I probably would have a cat because they seem less work than a dog I LOVE dogs, but they seem like a bit too much work for me at the moment

CW: Gender Dysphoria... I think probably the worst thing to happen to me was before I knew I was transfem, my old Dr put me on Testosterone because mine "was too low"... I was barely 16 or so I didn't feel like I had a say so I got the injections weekly and I knew shortly after starting something felt wrong but even stopping didn't help my body felt wrong more than it ever had and I still miss my old hair it was so good fucking sweet and full before I started loosing it... honestly I have found some good in this experience, because without it maybe it would have taken me longer to recognize I was trans

Honestly just a text from a friend sharing something they love! Random texts from friends are always appreciated!

This will depend on what you would wanna do. I love going to the cinema to see movies, going to the local chill lgbt bar for a drink, going outdoors for a hike (in the spring through fall), and many other things. I also love just chilling and playing games or watching TV. I'm sure we would play some Guilty Gear: Strive at least!

Does anyone wanna speed run best friends any% with me?

[lostjonscave]

mag 123

melanie: hey what the fuck are you doing here i thought you literally died

jon: ...i got better

[whindsor]

mucky + "Some days I feel broken inside, but I just don’t want to admit it."

the one where she’s drunk

“I got this.” she slurred, her hands moving slowly as she tried to unlock her door. She was leaning against the wall for support, a sure sign that she did not, in fact, have this.

“Here, let me see.” Bucky said, holding his hand out. She groaned, handing the keys over to him in defeat. He’d never seen her like this before, but based on the shouting match he’d heard through the walls between her and her mother, he didn’t blame her for the state she was in. He unlocked her door for her, making sure she made it in and stumbled to the couch. With difficulty, she reached down and pulled off her shoes before collapsing against the cushions. Bucky moved to the kitchen, going to make her some tea.

“Maybe my mom’s right.” she said, her voice muffled by the arm over her face. “Maybe I’m just a fuck up.”

“You’re not a fuck up.” he replied, putting the kettle on to boil. He rested his hands on the kitchen island, looking at her. She moved from her back to her side, so now her voice was muffled by the couch pillow.

“I know I’m not supposed to be. I’m supposed to be the responsible kid, the successful one. I’m supposed to be married with kids and supporting my mom and Nicoletta and I’m supposed to have my shit together…I’m the oldest now, I shouldn’t be…” she left her sentence hanging, and he wasn’t sure how she meant to end it. He could see tears glistening in her eyes, and her voice was thick as she said, “Some days I feel broken inside, but I just don’t want to admit it.”

His heart stilled at the confession. He knew, logically, that everyone had things in their life that they regretted. But he didn’t realize that Mika’s weighed so heavily on her. He went to the couch, kneeling in front of her. She looked up at him with her tear filled eyes, waiting to hear what he had to say. 

“You may have been broken once, Little Bird.” he said, and her hand instinctively reached out and held his. He wanted to tell her everything, everything about his past, and everything she’d done to help him when he was at his most broken. But instead he just said, “But you’ve put yourself back together rather nicely.”

“Like those Japanese bowls they fix with gold?” she asked, making him chuckle.

“Exactly. Stronger and more beautiful than before.” he answered. He surprised himself at the compliment; he usually avoided voicing his opinions about her physical appearance so as to not make her uncomfortable. But his statement made her smile brightly.

“You think I’m beautiful?” she questioned. At least Drunk Mika was easily distracted, even if she was calling him out.

“Very much so.” he replied. She squealed, pushing herself just enough so she could launch herself onto him in a clumsy embrace. His right arm instinctively went around her waist, the left reaching out to the floor to steady them. She leaned heavily into him, trusting him to hold her up. He breathed in the scent of flowers and liquor, a warmth building behind his chest that he didn’t understand. 

“You’re the best, you know that? The best man I know.” she said, holding onto him tightly. In the kitchen, the kettle started whistling, and just like that she was laying back on the couch. His skin felt cold where she’d vacated, but he didn’t pay it any mind. 

He went to the kitchen, happy to have something to do with his hands, and an excuse to turn away so she wouldn’t see exactly how hard he was blushing.

[saltyxtides]

MONTGOMERY WARDEYN.

When Monty showed up for her Valentine’s Day visit for her brother she entered with a big over zealous and over dramatic hug for him. She set a ginormous basket of decandant candies and chocolates from all over the world down first. Then she smothered him.

“Happy Valentine’s Day brother of mine. Your Valentine has arrived. Aren’t you happy now? Cherish it now before you get stuck with mother all night. She’s already in the bathtub gin. Good luck with that.”

“I know I’m the best thing that ever happened to you and the highlight of your day. I’m the blessing of your life. You don’t even have to say it. I know you’ll never have a real girl out there for a Valentine but I got all prettied up, just for our dance. Don’t carry on how I’m better than another girl because I’ll never leave you like you always do, but it is true. I never will. Never, ever, EVER. Okay, I have a date after dropping you off with mom, but it’s for you too. She’s making me play shadow caddy. Ew. But, I love, uv you, wuv you.”  

Then she’d back up and do a little spin for him so he could see her dress all in pale pink lace. It was something designer though the real Bayden rarely called these things out, just told her she looked so pretty.

“Now where is it? Before we dance. Show me what little drawing or confection you’ve whipped up for me this year. Is it a poem? A song? Gimme, gimme.” Then she plopped herself right into his lap like an ever so close space invading sister might. “What quaint little BayBay way have you chosen to honor me this year?”

( @montywonmom​ )

       MONTGOMERY W a r d e y n buzzed around like she’d guzzled every drop of espresso.  Her actions were downright condescending like a Katy Perry parody video.  && they finally understood where Bayden’s arrogance stems from: that. 

       Dozen’s of times they had rehearsed Monty’s return in there head — the dramatic embrace, the exacting chosen gifts pattern last’s Christmas greetings.  They’re own breath felt tight, as if the walls were pressing in being constricted by something as dangerous as a python hugging them back weakly.  

       “ Happy Valentine’s Day, little sister. ”  A spin off of Montgomery’s own words used.  Only they didn’t look happy about Monty’s statement about DR.W a r d e y n.  The mama boy’s persona.  It was easy to show how they truly felt on the inside. A fiery scowl that felt like it wasn’t going away anytime soon.

       The more && more time they spent with Montgomery, in Bayden’s body the more his sister reminded them of Mother Gothel.  Only it’s the sibling addition Instead of listening through it, Monty’s voice began to sound tiny && helium high-pitched, as far away as an echo.

       If Bayden was meant to be controlled, that idjit would have come with a mother fucking remote.  But guess what?  He’s is own person.  What did his own sister really know about him?  It’s worse that his own sister didn’t even think about the concept of him ever falling in love.

       Could be a thing someday!  Anything was possible, but if it didn’t revolve around her, she wouldn’t notice.  He is a qualified person.  Not bothering to listen much after that, thus they lose more brain cells in the process.  Not quite looking to happy && keeping there thoughts to themselves.

       Only to be re-awakened into the moment when Monty sat on there lap.  Who did she think they were?  Jolly old St. Nicholas.  Wasn’t she a little to old to be sitting on his brother’s lap like this.  It was a high level of uncomfortable-ness, as she needed to leave room for the holy spirit.

       Not that they even believed in the holy spirit!  But damn girl give some space.  “ It’s not much. “ Taking a small bundle of daffodils — wrapped in yarn to hold it together ( god forbid the string nurse would come back again knowing Bayden’s luck ).  Freshly picked from the Asylum Grounds.

       Pink lemonade rock candy.  Though they couldn’t match Bayden's real skill of CHEF B o y b a y d e n style.  This was still food-relative?  Also re-using the cupcakes they made for them would have been safe, but let’s face it.  The calories consumption of a cupcake ( 131+ c. ) vs. rock candy ( 15 - 50 c. ).  

      It would be a waste to give them to her if she would just throw them away in the end.  Only now they had to try to finish things quickly between them.  As they didn’t want to stay anymore longer than they should.  “ Monty I’m not in the mood right now to stick around, fake a dance, so let’s JUST l e a v e.”

[technetiumai]

Hi all!

Thank you for the Six Sentence Sunday tags @bazzybelle, @captain-aralias, @cutestkilla, @bookish-bogwitch, and @ivelovedhimthroughworse. I was too wrapped up in other stuff to post anything, but I loved reading what everyone’s working on!

So, I have decided to start writing the Niamh-is-a-vigilante dystopian fic. My current WIPs are Atomic Son and Silence and Cries, and Silence and Cries is requiring a lot of research (which is mostly auxiliary and possibly unnecessary, but... my process is my process) which is making the process very slow going, and I’m struggling with the Atomic Son scenes that I’m working on, to the point where it’s just better to have something else to brain barf into while I’m ruminating on that. So, even though I don’t really like having so many WIPs, here we are. I felt like I needed another thing, and this is the thing, apparently.

It is pretty absurd so far (not in like a goofy Monty Python way, but in a wth is going on, this universe makes absolutely no sense, who thought of this way), and I’ve decided to roll with it. In the grand scheme of things I haven’t been writing for very long, and I’ve certainly never written anything like this. The only way to learn is just to do it. 

There will be cliches and endlessly cringy dialogue. There will be bizarre set-pieces with no reasonable explanation. There will be forced attempts at explanations that don’t actually hold up to any scrutiny. It will be ridiculous, and that will be okay. (Can you tell I’m trying to talk myself up about this?)

CW: References to being in the middle of a suicide attempt.

“I came here thinkin’ no one else would be here.”

“Funny thing, that. I came here knowing it’s where people go to fall from tall heights to die quick deaths.”

“Is that why we come here?”

“Isn’t it?”

I let my body fall forward a bit, leaning out over the edge. “Perhaps there’s hope amongst the trees. Hope that can’t be found up here.”

“Can’t think what good hope would do you when your body’s turned to mush at the bottom of the forest.”

I finally look at him. He’s got bronze curly hair and kind eyes. He’s clearly a mitling, he’s not trying to hide it. If I couldn’t tell by his voice, I could tell by his clothes. The clothes of the upper-class, only a generation or so past. Patched up and loose fitting, but not filthy and put back together piecemeal like most of the clothes worn by my people.

“So, you make a habit of… interrupting people?”

“You could say that.”

“What’s the game? You try to convince me that life’s worth livin’?”

“Oh,” he chuckles, “‘no. Nothing like that. I didn’t come here to lie to you, or fill you up with ideas that even I don’t believe. I’d just like to propose,” he makes a gesture of ambivalence, “an alternate way of dying.”

“This way seems perfectly suitable for me, thank you, Mr.---”

He holds out his hand for me to shake. “Simon Snow.”

“Simon Snow.”  I don’t lift my hand. “Is that fake?”

He lets out a good natured sigh and drops his hands. “‘Course it’s fake, Niamh. I’m asking you to become an assassin for a secret society plotting the downfall of the government.”

“So that's it, is it?”

He shrugs and bobs his head in affirmation.

“Fair enough, then. Though it hardly seems fair, seein’ as you know my name. “

“Of course I know your name. I’m asking you to become an assassin for a secret society plotting the downfall of the government.”

“Right.”

Not much so far, but it’s a start. It will be called “Night-Switch Paragons” and it will come out... eventually... and at whatever pace I can manage...

Tagging some of the people who said they’d be interested in this au when I posted about it before: @prettylightsbigcity, @aroace-genderfluid-sheep, @hairasuntouchedaspartoftheamazon