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#-really help me to finish uni and pass to the next step and maybe with a little help from the pubblication of the article it could be -
pollyna · 2 years
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There's a job offer for which I'm kinda qualified for? And it pays better than the other two I have seen but now the point is if what I think is "my qualifications" is actually something valuable and valid or not. 🫡
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lgchangyul · 10 months
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blossom here back with a second muse and here i'm introducing song hangyul, a trainee since july 2020 and hoping to debut as an actor ! here is his profile and here are some brief connections i have, though i'll have more under the read more below ! as usual, if you'd like to plot, give this a like and i'll message you to plot ( i'd prefer to plot on discord or twitter as tumblr shadowbanned junkyu's account and i'm traumatised ;'; ) edit: feel free to add me on dscord at minipochacco or follow me on twtter 94joobebe if you want to plot ! i'm scared to message everyone in case this account gets sh*dowbanned.
background
introducing song hangyul, born on 31st december 1998 and wanting to debut as an actor !
he was born and raised in jeju until moving to seoul in 2001 ( when he was 3 ).
ex taekwondo athlete, gave it up in order to pursue what he really wanted to do.
his parents weren't too happy about it because they wanted him to continue with taekwondo, but his heart always leant more towards acting, but eventually after a lot of begging and pleading, they let him pursue acting instead.
not too long after, his parents split up simply because the romance just wasn't there anymore, which wasn't a bad thing for hangyul because they were both still actively in his life, just with some adjustments.
studied hard and did well in school, enrolled to uni to study acting, finished uni. auditioned for legacy in july 2020 and passed, becoming a trainee !
he didn't want to rush any opportunities that came up and instead wanted to focus more on enhancing his skills which is why he didn't rush into moving to the acting path ( yet ).
personality
he's a very sweet guy with a pretty playful side, he's a chill guy and outgoing, really that kind of guy who will offer you his shoulder if you need to cry. he's really carefree, he see's the beauty in the little things in life and i think that's what makes him so endearing too??? things like watching the sunrise, a cup of coffee in the morning, seeing the morning buzz of people heading to work etc, things like that easily make him smile.
honestly, he's a hopeful guy?? and i think that can make him come across as a little bit naïve, some people might think he's silly for seeing the world in such bright, lovely colors when it's not always like that.
a mommas boy fr, after his parents split up, he always made sure she was doing okay. he'd cook a lot for her or help out with cooking, he essentially was like a rock to her.
cares a lot about the people close to him, and he'll show it through ways like acts of service. you'll know if you're someone close to him.
he's hard working and believes that hard work pays off, and he's not the type of person to step on others to get what he wants. he wants to do things properly, the right way and earn his way up rightfully.
he's kinda clumsy, he breaks something at least once a week and he'll apologise 80 times and feel bad about it for the next week too.
he is NOT a night owl, the latest he'll sleep is like.. midnight, he loves waking up in the morning because to him, every morning is a brand new day with new opportunities !
essentially, he's like that person you want in your life, simply because he's so hopeful and uplifting and being around him is just.. inspiring and motivating.
random, brief plots
flower garden friends / hangyul loves flowers, another thing he see's beauty in and he loves visiting flower gardens and things like that, so someone who also loves flowers or visiting flower gardens. perhaps they found a shared interest and decided to visit together, or they simply bumped into each other there. minjun.
reality check / someone who maybe hasn't had it easy, has had a difficult life and knows how hard and complicated the world can be, perhaps they're annoyed at how optimistic hangyul can be and try to give him a reality check ( or this could be adjusted where hangyul tries his best to show your muse that the world can be an enjoyable place too ).
close friends / when hangyul joined legacy, he struggled to settle in a bit because it was all so new to him, and perhaps your muse was one of the first friends he made here.
under the facade friends / someone who's seen hangyul down, unlike himself and saw how he really can be when he's his his usual, bubbly, happy and uplifting self. maybe your muse knows how he is usually, or your muse doesn't know what he's usually like. someone who's seen that side to him that he rarely ever shows ( more so because he doesn't get like that often ).
soulmates / quite literally, hangyul's person. best friends. platonic soulmates. two peas in a pod, the one person he'll show all sides of himself to without a worry that your muse will judge him. jinyoung.
blind date / a fun plot where perhaps their parents set them up on a blind date at some point. whether they knew each other prior to the date or not can be discussed.
issues / someone who just has an issue with hangyul for whatever reason. he has no clue why, and even though he's usually always kind and carefree, it bugs him that your muse has a distaste for him and he wants to know why.
events
trainee mission 015
traditional korean games: open, open educational video: open reflection solo: to be completed
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watchmegetobsessed · 4 years
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Failed, Faked, Fallen - Harry Styles
a/n: this story was a pain in the ass, not gonna lie and i really thought i would just end up deleting the whole thing but I MADE IT TO THE END YAY so now please take the time to read bc it literally made me want to jump off a cliff lol
special thanks to @pastequeharry​ for putting up with me throught the writing process, she is the reason i didn’t just delete the whole thing haha
pairing: Fratboy!Harry x Reader (fake dating AU)
word count: 16.6k
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Tonight has been in the making for ten years. Every fiber in your body is protesting against it, but you just can’t carry this massive secret around any longer. You need to tell your best friend that you are in love with him, have been since middle school when you first met him. It’s a scary thing to come clean about your feelings for someone, but you feel like it’s now or never.
Your friendship with Oliver has been always a little… blurry. You were just regular friends when he was dating someone, but whenever he was single, he seemed to seek comfort and intimacy with you. It always starts with him getting a little more touchy and cuddly with you, then comes the kissing and hugging, his hands wandering to places friends shouldn’t explore and you somehow always end up in a bed…  
Then it would immediately change once he got himself a girlfriend and you figured he has just been confused about his feelings for you. It has to be that, right? These past few weeks the situation was the same. He broke up with this girl he was seeing all summer before you all came back to school and you think this is the perfect time to finally talk about what’s really going on between the two of you.
Your roommate, Sandra has helped you with your makeup for tonight’s frat party and now you are deciding on the dress. You want to look your best so when Oliver confesses his love for you tonight, you’ll look as dreamy and pretty as you always dreamed about.
“The black one is fucking mint,” Sandra points at the black bodycon dress lying on your bed. “I can give you my red leather jacket,” she offers, finishing up putting her hoop earrings in.
“The red jacket?” you eye her in surprise. Sandra loves that jacket more than her own life. The two of you have been sharing your clothes since you became roommates last year, but the jacket has been off limits always.
“I know how important tonight is for you. The occasion deserves the red jacket,” she chuckles, stepping to her wardrobe to get the jacket. It’s the most badass leather jacket you’ve ever seen, looks so perfect on Sandra every time she wears, you feel honored she is letting you take it for the day.
“Oliver won’t be able to keep his eyes off of you,” she smiles at you excited once you’re all dressed. The jacket looks amazing, pulls the look together perfectly, you can’t deny that.
Soon enough, the two of you leave the dorm and head in the way of Kappa Chi, that’s only a fifteen minute walk away from your dorm. They are having a party almost every other week, those boys would celebrate the stupidest shit just to fill their house up with people and booze as much as possible. You and Sandra have been attending their parties since first year, it’s always a great way to unwind after a tiring week at uni.
“When is he coming?” Sandra asks over the music once you two arrive and head to the kitchen for a drink.
“Um, he texted me ten minutes ago that he is about to leave soon. He’ll be here shortly,” you tell her and thank her when she hands you a beer in a red solo cup.
The house is packed, just like always. Most of the football players from school are member of Kappa Chi, so naturally, all girls want to be around when they are throwing a party. You could say they are the popular guys, but it’s not like in the movies. They are just some particularly handsome guys living together, attracting a lot of girls. They are not at all unreachable, you are kind of friends with a few of them as well even without being a sorority girl yourself.
Standing in the kitchen you get into a conversation with a few girls from your dorm, that’s when you see Harry Styles storm through the house, Naomi Saddler following behind him, seemingly very much in the middle of a fight he doesn’t want to take part in. You know Harry, but you couldn’t say you two are that close. You did a group project last year together and he is actually a really smart guy despite the gossips about him just being a dumb womanizer. He surely is a ladies’ favorite, but you wouldn’t say the description fits him. You haven’t actually seen him with more than three girls since freshman year, unlike some of his other teammates that hook up with a different girl every weekend. He and Naomi have been in this on-off relationship for a few months now, but you don’t know much about them. You don’t run in the same groups to know the details.
The two of them disappear upstairs and you are pulled out of your thoughts when someone asks you a question, so you forget about Harry and Naomi in a blink of an eye.
An hour passes and still no sign of Oliver and you start to feel anxious. You shoot him a text, struggling a little with the typing thanks to the alcohol you’ve been consuming to keep your cool. Surprisingly, he answers right away.
Oliver: Be there in 3. Meet me outside?
Y/N: Sure!
“Alright, wish me luck,” you tell Sandra as you fill your cup again and head outside.
Kappa Chi has a nice backyard with a decent sized pool, some beerpong tables and lots of lounge chairs. You walk past the beerpong games, paying no attention to them at all as you go for an empty lounge chair. You sit down, fix your dress nervously and wait while you try to think through what you’ll tell him.
You can’t believe you are finally telling him how you are feeling. Your teenager self would be peeing herself is she knew what you are planning to do now. All those years of pining and crying whenever Oliver had a girlfriend in the past, now is your chance to finally be that girl and you’re actually quite convinced he’ll say he feels the same way about you.
Fidgeting with one of the zippers on Sandra’s jacket, you nervously wait for Oliver to show up. You look in the direction of the backdoor right when he appears from the crowd inside. Your heart skips a beat as you stand up quickly, a smile tugging on your lips. You are just about to wave in his way to catch his attention when you see some brunette by his side… holding his hand. And then she kisses him shortly right before they step out of the house.
What the fuck?! This cannot be true. Who is she? And why do you know nothing about her? Did Oliver keep it a secret that he is dating someone? But why?!
For a moment you actually feel like you are about to faint. Blood rushes out of your head as you see the couple walk their way around the beerpong tables, Oliver obviously looking for you, but you can’t bring yourself to move.
“Y/N! There you are!” he beams happily, pulling the brunette with him when he finally spots you. You need a moment for yourself to get over the first wave of your shock.
“Oh, yeah! Hi!” you smile awkwardly, eyes meeting with the girl’s. She is so pretty and actually seems nice. You hate her for that.
“Y/N, I want you to meet Lexi,” Oliver introduces the brunette. “Lexi, this is Y/N.”
“I’ve heard so much about you, Y/N!” she smiles, pulling you into a hug that catches you off guard for sure.
“Wow, I… wish I could say the same,” you bitterly reply, eyes meeting Oliver’s once Lexi lets go of you. He is clearly uncomfortable at your comment, but tries to mask it quickly.
“Yeah, I’m sorry I haven’t had the chance to tell you about Lexi. But it’s kind of new.”
“How new?”
“We’ve been going out for about three weeks,” she answers your question, her hand finding his pretty quickly as she smiles up at him with so much adoration.
“Oh,” is all you manage to get out for a moment. You still haven’t completely processed that your plan just went straight out the window and that once again, Oliver chose another girl over you.
But then, the more you think about it, the angrier you get. You are tired of this stupid game you two have been playing, but you also have no idea what to do about it.
“I thought that Y/N, if you have a boyfriend, we could maybe go on some double dates! Would be so much fun!” Lexi suggests, but her words make your stomach churn. You have always wanted to go on double dates, but with Oliver being your date. Not someone else’s…
“I uhh… I don’t…” You are so frozen, you can’t even think of an answer, you just want to leave as soon as possible, so you can cry yourself to sleep. Oliver brings an arm around Lexi’s shoulders, looking down at you as if he wasn’t cuddling you just not that long ago. As if he wasn’t preaching your beauty a few weeks ago, making you feel like the only girl in the world. This is so not fair.
“Y/N is not a fan of double dates.”
Suddenly, an arm swings around your shoulders and a tall body stands next to you, pulling you to his side. Turning your head you are shocked to see Harry standing there, smiling at Oliver and Lexi as if this discussion was completely his business.
Oliver seems just as shocked as you are. He is staring at the football player by your side with wide eyes.
“Wait, you two are… dating?”
“It’s pretty new, but yeah. Y/N and I have been going out for a while. Right, baby?” He squeezes your arm, glancing down at you and when your eyes meet, he gives you a look that says ‘just go with it, I’m saving your ass’ and you decide to play your part.
“Oh, umm, yeah. We’ve kind of reconnected when we got back after the summer,” you nod, hoping that your voice doesn’t give you away.
“That’s amazing!” Lexi cheers, clearly eating up the impromptu lie, but as you glance at Oliver, you can tell he is sceptic.
“I didn’t even know you were friends in the first place,” he comments, eyebrows furrowed a little as he eyes Harry’s hand on your shoulder.
“We were! We had a great time working on a group project last year and then later I asked for her number. But the summer was so busy for both of us, so we kind of fell out, but then we met again in September and I finally manned up to ask her out.”
You are impressed by how easily Harry is lying. If you didn’t know it wasn’t true, you would eat it up just as easily as Lexi is doing right now. Especially because his body language matches up with what he is saying so well. He is keeping you close, fingers dancing on your upper arm and shoulder, anyone would think he actually has a thing for you, but you know that’s not true. You two are barely even friends.
“That sounds so nice. We definitely should meet up sometime, the four of us!” Lexi suggests again and you stop yourself from rolling your eyes.
“We’ll see about that. But I’ll have to steal Y/N away now, I have something to show her.” Harry bids his goodbye quickly, pulling you away before Oliver could even say a thing and you just blindly follow him inside the house.
You don’t even process what’s happening. Harry takes your hand, pulling you through the crowd and you catch Sandra’s gaze who is still standing in the kitchen, her eyes widening when she sees you with Harry. You just shrug in confusion, following Harry upstairs until he leads you into a room that, you assume, is his.
When he shuts the door closed, the noises of the party gets muffled and you look at him with probably the stupidest look ever.
“Alright, let me explain myself,” he breathes out. “I’m sorry if I stepped over some boundaries, I just… I was outside and heard the conversation. Thought I would help you out.”
“But what made you think I needed help?” you ask. The conversation was very innocent for an outsider. He couldn’t know what you were planning to do, so why did he think you needed his help?
Harry gives you a tight-lipped smile, cocking his head to the side.
“Y/N, we might not be close friends, but I’ve seen you around with Oliver. It’s written on your forehead that you have the fattest crush on the guy.”
“What?!” you snap, feeling your cheeks heating up. “Is this really that obvious?!”
“Don’t worry, seems like he is one of the few that don’t seem to notice it. I saw how uncomfortable you were when he introduced the girl. Seemed like you needed the help.”
Nodding you take a few seconds to process everything that just happened. You shouldn’t have drunk that much, because now your brain has to work even harder to put the picture together.
“Alright, but… now they think that we are dating. Lexi will want to meet up with us and it will look stupid if we never even show up again together.”
Harry nods, his lips rolling into his mouth and you know just from his look that there’s more.
“Yeah, about that. I might have had some selfish reasons behind my actions as well.”
“What do you mean?”
Harry walks past you, over to his bed and sits on the edge, leaning forward to rest his arms on his thighs. You’re not sure what to do with yourself, if you should sit next to him or somewhere else, he has a few beanbags in the corner of his room, but you decide to just keep standing.
“So, I don’t know if you know this but I had this thing with Naomi Saddler.”
“Harry, everyone knows it.”
“Right, yeah,” he chuckles awkwardly. “So the thing is, we have broken up a long time ago, but she keeps coming after me and I’m just so over it. So when we were fighting earlier today I told her that I’m dating someone else so I would appreciate if she left me alone.”
He doesn’t need to say more, you finally see the whole picture. He helped you because he felt sorry for you, but also because he thought it would benefit him as well. You could be his new girlfriend so Naomi would finally let him be. You have to admit, it’s a lucky coincidence, but still, the situation is a little absurd for your liking.
“So… what are we supposed to do now?” you ask, tilting your head to the side. Harry looks up at you, seemingly surprised you haven’t snapped at him.
“Well, I know it sounds crazy, but I think we both would benefit from it if we just… pretended to be a couple,” he clears off.
“Like, a real couple?”
“Well, obviously not real, but it would look real to others,” he chuckles, standing up and taking a few steps closer to you. “I know it sounds stupid, but I’m convinced we could pull it off.”
“We barely know each other.”
“We’ll have plenty of time for that, won’t we?” he asks with a boyish smirk. “Look, we just have to appear together here and there. I’ll pick you up sometimes, we can go for lunch or dinner sometimes, and I’ll get you tickets for some of my games. That’s it. People will see us out together and that’s gonna be perfectly enough. Or do you actually hate me? Now is the time to tell me.”
“I don’t hate you, I don’t know you that well,” you reply with a soft chuckle. “But I’m not convinced enough this is a good idea at all.”
Harry sighs and walks closer until he can rest his hands on your shoulders. You look deep into his green eyes as he smiles at you warmly.
“Let’s make a deal. You can use me as an excuse whenever Oliver and Lexi wants to hang out with you, or if they actually force you to meet them, I’ll go with you so you won’t be the third wheel. And you’ll just have to say that I’m your boyfriend and spend some time with me so Naomi believes I’m dating you. I think it’s a fair deal for the both of us. And you can call it off anytime, I don’t want to force you to do anything you don’t want to.”
You chew on your bottom lip, thinking hard to figure out what to do. Judging from this short conversation with Lexi, you’re sure she’ll try to keep you around often, but you are not in the mood to watch Oliver be all lovey-dovey with someone else, so you could actually use a solid excuse, which Harry just offered you on a silver plate. You just have to spend some time with him in exchange and tell people he is your boyfriend. It’s not that horrible and you always thought Harry is nice company, you two just never was in the same friend group to get closer. You can’t really bring up anything against his plan.
“Okay,” you finally nod, Harry’s eyebrows shooting up in surprise.
“Really?”
“Why are you so shocked? Your points were valid, I’m willing to give it a try.”
“Yes! Thank you!” he cheers, arms wrapping around you as he hugs you tight in excitement. “I’ll be the best boyfriend you’ve ever had, you won’t be disappointed!”
You want to say how it’s easy to be the best because you’ve had none so far, but you decide to keep this information to yourself.
“We need to get our story straight though, so we don’t mess it up when someone asks.”
The two of you go over an elaborate timeline of your nonexistent relationship so you’ll be able to tell the same story. It’s the same he told Lexi and Oliver outside, you just agree on the details, like when you started dating, how he asked you out, what you’ve been doing as a couple lately.
When you leave his room a little later you’re still a tad bit shocked where this evening ended up heading. You really thought tonight would be the turning point for you and Oliver, but now you are in a fake relationship with Harry Styles, ready to fool everyone around you.
Walking down the stairs Harry takes your hand and laces your fingers together. You agreed on no kissing on the lips for now, but other touching is allowed, you’re just not used to have someone other than Oliver touch you like this.
“Want another drink?” he asks as the two of you walk into the kitchen. You’ve already caught some wide-eyed look upon your arrival, but you’re trying your best to ignore them.
“I surely need it,” you nod, making Harry chuckle.
Sandra and the other girls are still in the kitchen and she immediately pulls you to the side when Harry lets go of you to get drinks.
“What the fuck?!” she snaps, clearly a little drunk, but not enough to ignore the fact that she has seen you now two times holding Harry’s hand.
“Sandra, don’t freak out, I’ll explain it all when we go home, alright? But… as far as you know, Harry and I are dating.”
“You what? You better fucking tell me everything when we get back to the dorm!” she demands right when Harry appears, two cups in his hands, giving you one of them.
“Here,” he smiles warmly.
“Thank you. Harry, this is Sandra, my roommate.”
“Hi, I think I’ve seen you around, but we just never met.” Harry holds out his now empty hand and Sandra shakes it with a dramatic smile, clearly still confused about the situation.
“Yeah, but I guess we’ll be… seeing each other more?” she implies, telling Harry she knows something is up without using those words.
“Ehm, I guess,” he nods, a little uncomfortable before he turns to you. “Alright, I’ll get out of your hair. Let me know when you want to go back to the dorm.” “Sure,” you nod, Harry squeezes your hand gently before moving away.
Sandra is dying to know what the situation is with Harry, but you don’t really have the chance to talk in the middle of the party, so it’s postponed to later. You and Harry do your own thing through the rest of the night, occasionally interacting whenever you cross paths. When that happens he makes sure to touch your arm or face, have a few words with you so people see that the two of you have a thing going on.
It’s a little past one am when you and Sandra decide it’s time to head home. As promised, you shoot Harry a text that you’re planning to leave and he replies with one saying he’ll meet you outside at the front. By the time you and Sandra step outside, he is already there waiting.
“Ladies, let me walk you home,” he smirks charmingly, offering his arm for the both of you, so this is how you head home: you, Sandra and Harry walking side by side with linked arms.
“Mm, Harry, I hope you know you won’t be spending the night in our room,” Sandra sighs, clearly a little too lost in her drunk thoughts. Harry chuckles, finding it amusing that Sandra is so blunt.
“Weren’t planning to.”
“Good. I’m not gonna listen to you guys have sex all night.”
“Sandra!” you snap at her, gasping. It’s funny how she also believed the little act you and Harry put up tonight.
The walk back to the dorm is short and it’s mostly filled with Sandra’s babbling about whatever catches her attention. Arriving to the building Sandra says her goodbye to Harry, heading up to the room on her own so you can have a minute with Harry.
“I’ve had at least ten people coming up to me tonight, asking about you,” Harry tells you, an excited sparkle in his eyes.
“Really? And what did you tell them?”
“What we agreed on. That you’re my girlfriend.”
“Sounds so weird,” you admit with a chuckle.
“You’ll get used to it,” he nods smiling. “Well, I’m gonna head back. I’ll talk to you later, okay? We’ll discuss the dates and all.”
“Very romantic,” you point out smirking, but Harry just laughs before he gives you a quick hug.
“Good night, Y/N. Or should I say, baby?”
“Bye!” you sing waving in his way as you walk into the building.
It’s no surprise that Sandra is already out when you walk into the room. Her clothes are in a pile next to her bed, but she managed to throw on at least a t-shirt before she passed out. You just smile at her before doing your quick night routine and go to sleep yourself.
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“So… you are fake dating Harry, because Oliver introduced you his new girlfriend and also because he is trying to get rid of Naomi? Am I getting this right?”
Sandra narrows her eyes at you over her morning coffee the next day, though it’s already past noon. Waking up was a little painful for the both of you, but especially for her, the two of you decided to treat yourselves for a very late brunch while you tell her everything she needs to know about last night.
“Yeah,” you nod, taking a bite from your waffles. “I know, it sounds stupid, but… it can easily work great for the both of us.”
“I can’t believe he just came up with it. You guys are not even really friends.”
“I know, I was shocked when he appeared all of a sudden and called me baby. Almost fainted,” you chuckle.
“I hope you know you’ll be one of the most envied girls in school if the news spread and I’m sure it will, because even I heard people talking about you and Harry last night.”
“I know, but there’s not much I can do about that,” you shrug.
“I feel like it’s the plotline of some teenage rom-com,” Sandra huffs. “Just be careful, Y/N,” she sighs, finishing off her coffee.
“What do you mean?”
“I mean that pretending can easily turn into reality. If you’ll spend so much time with Harry, there’s a chance you’ll develop real feelings for him. Just make sure you won’t end up with a broken heart.”
“That’s silly, I won’t fall for Harry. I…” You cut your words, thoughts wandering over to Oliver right away, and how you felt when he introduced you to Lexi.
“I hope you’re right,” Sandra tells you, stuffing the last bits of her muffin into her mouth.
The weekend flies by fast, you busy yourself with doing laundry and finishing a paper you need to turn in soon. Harry text you on Sunday that he’ll walk you to class on Monday morning and you agree to meet up a little earlier so you can actually talk it all out.
Sandra is still in bed when you leave in the morning. Just as Harry promised, he is waiting for you in front of the building, wearing his usual black skinny jeans and a loose grey shirt and a zip-up hoodie. His curls look untamed, a little all over the place, but it looks good on him. You have to admit, that he is definitely handsome, you understand why so many of the girls at school are after him.
“Good morning, girlfriend,” he smirks, holding out his hand for you that you take, still feeling a little weird about walking around campus hand in hand with him.
“Good morning. How was your weekend?”
“Pretty boring, we had to clean up after the party,” he chuckles. “Wanna grab a coffee?”
“Sounds perfect.”
You swing by the little café that’s on campus before aiming for a bench under one of the pergolas near the main building.
“So, you still haven’t changed your mind,” he speaks up. It’s not a question, more like a comment.
“Not yet,” you chuckle softly, sipping on your cappuccino.
“I meant it that you can tell me whenever you want out. I don’t want to force you into it in any way.”
“I know,” you smile at him. “I’m fine for now. It’s just still a little weird.”
“I know, but I’m kind of happy you are the one I’m doing this with.”
“How come?”
“I don’t know, you seem like a cool person. I actually enjoyed working with you last year on that project, you are funny and smart, I think we’ll get along pretty well.”
“Really?”
“Of course,” he smirks at you, taking a sip from his coffee. “You know, if I’m being honest I never understood why you and that Oliver guy were so close anyway. You’ve known him for a long time?”
“Yeah, met him in middle school and we’ve been friends since then.”
“And how long have you been… you know,” he implies, seemingly very careful not to ask something that would upset you.
“Pretty much ever since I’ve met him,” you admit with an awkward chuckle. It sounds so embarrassing to admit that you’ve been in love with your best friend for so long and never worked up the courage to do something about it.
“You never even tried to tell him?”
“I was too afraid of his reaction. I was planning to come clean at the party finally, but then he arrived with Lexi and… you know the rest.”
“I’m sorry. I know how shitty it is when you have feelings for someone and they don’t feel the same about you.”
“So what’s the situation with you and Naomi then?” you ask, thinking it’s only fair if you also know his story now that you confessed him how ridiculous you’ve been with Oliver all your life.
“We dated at the end of last semester, tried to keep it up in the summer as well, but it didn’t work. It made me realize I don’t even want it to work so I told her that we should just go our separate ways when I got back after the summer, but she wasn’t a fan of my idea.”
“She’s still in love with you?”
“I’m not sure if she ever was,” he truthfully answers. “I think she liked the idea of dating someone more than she liked me.”
“I’m sorry about that.”
“Don’t be,” he smirks at you playfully. “I’m all good. I just wish she could accept that I want to move on. It’s not ideal that I have to fake date someone to get rid of her.”
“She always seemed like a nice girl to me, I wouldn’t have guessed she can be so stubborn.”
“Well, she is a nice girl,” Harry nods. “We were just not compatible on the long run, you know? I couldn’t see it work in the future, so I didn’t want to waste more time on it.”
You just shyly nod, even though you don’t really know about it. You can’t, because you’ve never been in a similar situation. You’ve had a few attempts at dating in high school, but they never turned out the way you wanted and you always ended up pining after Oliver at the end, so you eventually gave up. But you’re not willing to admit that to Harry. It’s pathetic enough that you’ve been so hung up on Oliver your whole life, he doesn’t need to know that you gave up your whole dating life for the wait for him.
“Well, aren’t we a nice pair then? Two ridiculously failed love stories, how tragic,” Harry chuckles softly as he finishes up his coffee and throws the empty cup into the bin next to him.
“Yeah, pathetic,” you agree with a tight-lipped smile.
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It takes some time for word to travel, but by the end of the first week of your fake relationship, it becomes a well-known fact that you are indeed dating Harry Styles. You don’t overdo it though, only meeting up once or twice a day, Harry usually walks you to your classes in the morning if he doesn’t have a lecture himself, you’ve had lunch together twice and you went to the library on Thursday together. It’s been pretty casual and you’ve been actually enjoying spending time with Harry, especially because it seems like Oliver has fallen off the face of Earth lately, barely even talking to you.
The more time you spend with Harry the more you realize he is nothing like others try to make him look like. You’ve heard many gossips about him being an empty-headed womanizer, but he is a lot smarter than people assume him to be, but he has proven it before as well. He actually has a great point of view of life and it’s nice to discuss basically anything with him.
Friday brings another party and though you didn’t plan on going, you had Sandra and Harry convincing you this time. Then later Oliver texted you asking if you’d be there and it angered you a little. He barely spoke to you and is now asking if you are coming to the party where he’ll probably keep ignoring you for Lexi. So you told him you and Harry would be there. He didn’t reply to that.
You and Sandra call an Uber, the Omega house is a little farther away from the dorm than the Kappa house. Harry called you to tell you he’d be a little late this time because they are having a double practice today, but he would come and find you when he arrives.
“Isn’t it a little weird you can’t hook up with anyone because of the Harry situation?” Sandra asks as the two of you make your way through the spacious living room, heading to the empty loveseat in the corner.
“As if I did a lot of hooking up before,” you scoff, taking a sip from your drink.
“Okay, but you could be doing it now, but you can’t, because people would think you’re cheating.”
“It’s a good thing then that I’m not into hooking up,” you point out with a shrug. You were never a fan of just hooking up with someone and then move on the next morning, that’s just not for you. It’s not a big deal that you are kind of out of the dating scene because of your arrangement with Harry, you don’t feel like you’re missing out on anything.
The two of you are joined by a few peers from one of Sandra’s classes and you barely even notice when Oliver and Lexi arrive, however, they immediately spot you.
“Y/N! Hi! So good to see you again!” Lexi greets you, pulling you into a completely unnecessary hug.
“Oh, hi. Good to see you too, I guess,” you chuckle awkwardly. Oliver gives you a side hug as well, but it seems like he is not entirely present in his head.
“Where’s Harry?” Oliver questions.
“He’ll be here soon, he just had double practice today,” you tell him and he nods shortly, but something feels off about him.
Lexi makes you come to the kitchen with them so she can get a drink and you can’t really think of a reason why you shouldn’t, so you find yourself listening to her nonstop chatter while Oliver is mixing them something to drink.
Y/N: Harry, SOS! When are you getting here?? I’m stuck with O and L…
You really hope he is somewhere close, because you’re not sure how long you can put up with their company.
“I know last time you said you’re not a fan of double dates, but I really think we should give it a try!” Lexi begs you, she even puts her bottom lip at you and it annoys you how she can’t just leave you to be.
“Yeah, I would love to get to know Harry better,” Oliver chimes in.
“You do?”
Relief washes over you the moment you hear Harry’s voice coming from behind you, a moment later you feel his palm on the small of your back and you’re finally rescued. He smells like fresh body wash, he surely just had a shower right before he came here. You let yourself lean into his side, curling an arm around his waist.
“Harry, nice to see you again,” Oliver smiles at him dryly and now you’re sure something is up with him, but what is it?
“Sorry I’m so late. Everything alright?” Harry looks you in the eyes and you know his question is more than just him being nice. He wants to know if Oliver and Lexi has driven you up the walls.
“I’m… fine, yeah,” you nod and he holds your gaze for another moment before nodding to himself.
“We were just talking about how amazing a double date would be. I’m sure you could convince Y/N to come, right?” Lexi smiles at Harry and you catch a small frown on his face before he returns the smile to Lexi. You find it funny, but you push down your laugh.
“Um, not sure. Y/N always has a strong will, not sure I want to go against it.”
“Oh, come on! It’ll be fun!”
“Y/N doesn’t like PDA, I’m sure double dating is a lot for her,” Oliver comments and your eyebrows shoot up at his words.
“How would you know if I disliked PDA?”
He has no valid information about it. He wouldn’t know, because the only person you ever wanted to get touchy and lovey in public was him, but he only let you get physically close to him when no one was around. When he felt like he needed someone in his bed so he didn’t feel too alone. When he let his hands roam your body under the blanket when you were watching a movie. He never let it happen with others around though, so how would he even know what you like? Hell, even you don’t know it…
Oliver’s eyes meet yours and it’s clear that your question caught him off guard.
“You told me,” he simply answers.
“I don’t remember,” you retort, not letting him get away with it this time.
“This is how you’ve always been.” He is clearly pissed that you are going against him.
“You know what? Let’s do a double date next weekend, alright? But we have somewhere to be now, if you’ll excuse us,” Harry cuts in, taking your hand as he pulls you away from the happy couple. You glance back at Oliver one last time before turning around.
Harry walks you out to the backyard and the cool air hits you hard in the head. You haven’t even realized how hot you were getting in there, but you’re not entirely sure it was because of all the people, rather of because Oliver’s behavior.
“Okay, what the fuck was that in there?” Harry questions.
“What do you mean?”
“Y/N, I’m not dumb or blind. Lexi might be oblivious to whatever you and Oliver have going on, but I’m not. Something has happened between you and him, right?”
You chew on your bottom lip, crossing your arms on your chest, not too keen on admitting it. You have never told anyone about it in details, not even Sandra. She knows you and Oliver get a little too close at times, but she has no idea you’ve slept with him on several occasions. You always thought you were a fool for sleeping with him and then watching him date other girls.
Unfortunately, your silence is enough for Harry to draw his conclusion.
“Wait, what? Did you two…?”
“Yes,” you shortly nod, feeling uncomfortable, but you can tell you can’t dodge this conversation this time.
“You’re telling me he has the nerve to sleep with you whenever it’s convenient for him and then drop you when he starts dating someone else?”
“It sounds worse than how it really is,” you mumble, but you don’t truly believe your own words. It’s pretty bad either way.
“Y/N, this is fucked up. A friend wouldn’t do that to you. It’s one thing to seek comfort at your friends, but using them for your own physical needs is just way beyond the line.”
You have nothing to say. Deep down you know he is right, you’ve always known, but you never knew what to do against it. Before you could even stop yourself, you feel your lips trembling, tears bubbling in your eyes as you glance at Harry. You expect pity from him, an act that tells you that you brought it all to yourself, but that’s not what you see. He gives you an apologetic look and he is quick to pull you into a tight hug, exactly what you need right now.
“I know, I’m so stupid,” you mumble into his chest.
“You’re not. He is just an ass,” he corrects you, earning a small chuckle from you. “Hey, do you want to get out of here?” he asks, pulling back so he can look into your eyes.
“You just got here.”
“Yeah, but I’m not really in the mood to party. Want to have a bite somewhere?”
“That would be… great,” you nod with a small smile, sniffling a little before you wipe your cheeks.
You let Sandra know you’re leaving with Harry and she can tell something has happened, but you just tell her you’ll talk later and she doesn’t push it further. Harry takes your hand as the two of you make your way through the people and you spot Oliver near the kitchen, one arm around Lexi’s shoulders as his gaze meets yours. You see him clenching his jaw when he sees your hand in Harry’s hold, but you don’t pay much attention to him, wanting to get out of there as soon as possible.
Luckily Harry drove to the Omega house so now you don’t have to wait for a car or take a long walk, you can enjoy the comfort of his Rover as the two of you leave the party behind. It’s silent in the car, you fold your arms over your chest, your head resting against the car door, not even questioning him where you are headed.
About ten minutes later Harry pulls up at a little diner, the two of you walk in and it’s not surprising there are just a few people lingering around at this time, though you know later they’ll have quite a few drunk students that are on their way home and in desperate need of a late night bite.
You take an empty booth and a waitress arrives immediately, handing you each a menu.
“Do you go here often?” you ask quietly, eyeing the options.
“Sometimes. They have great fries.”
You nod and decide to have just a cheeseburger with fries and a lemonade while Harry gets the veggie burger and a milkshake. The waiter takes the order shortly and leaves you alone. You’re not sure what to say, but you feel like you need to say something.
“I’m sorry,” you mumble, staring down at your arms laying on the edge of the table, your right hand covering your left.
“For what exactly?”
“For… I just feel so stupid about this whole… Oliver thing. I know I shouldn’t have done what we did, but I just… couldn’t say no. I know, sounds ridiculous.”
“No, not at all,” Harry shakes his head. “You fell for him and he used you. If there’s anyone to blame it’s him, he shouldn’t use a friend for his own selfish needs. I’m not judging you, it’s easy to fall into holes like this.”
“I just really thought that he came to me because I meant something for him, but I can tell that… it wasn’t anything like that. The way he acted today was shockingly sobering,” you chuckle bitterly. “I think he is mad that I’m not available for him anymore and he is trying to play us down,” you say pointing at him and yourself. “So when he breaks it off with Lexi he can count on me, but it’s not happening.”
“I am happy to help you teach him any kind of lesson,” Harry grins just as the waiter arrives with the food and you start the feast. “I know you despise the idea of going on a double date with them, but I think we could have a lot of fun,” Harry points out while eating.
“How?”
“It’s obviously bugging Oliver that you are dating someone, we could give him the extra happy couple act, make him question why he was always such an asshole to you.”
“You think it would bother him?”
“Absolutely,” he chuckles. “We would serve him all the sappy, lovey couple shit from movies and get under his skin. I think it would be fun.”
“Okay, let’s do it,” you nod and Harry grins at you from across the table.
“Yes! Fake dating on maximum level!” he cheers, punching into the air, making you laugh.
As the two of you eat Harry talks your ears off and you know exactly why he just keeps on talking. He wants to take your mind away from everything about Oliver and he succeeds. He tells you stories about what it’s like to live in the frat house, all the funny things they’ve done with the boys and you just keep laughing and laughing until all the food is gone, the table is cleared off and it’s nearing one in the morning. Just as you expected, people from around the campus start dropping by for their midnight bite so the two of you slowly head out, not really wanting to run into someone you know. Harry drives you back to the dormitory and walks you up to the entrance.
“Thank you for tonight,” you breathe out, still feeling a little helpless and pathetic, but he definitely made it better with his company.
“No worries. After all, this is what boyfriends are for,” he chuckles lightly. “But I hope you are not gonna sink into self-pity over that douche.”
“Just a little?” you peek up at him with a scowl.
“Nope, not even a little, Y/N. He doesn’t deserve your time. If he is really gonna let you slip through his fingers, he is the biggest idiot on Earth. And he also has to be blind.”
For some reason, Harry’s words bring a blush to your cheeks, even if there’s a chance he doesn’t really mean them.
“Thank you,” you breathe out and he pulls you in for a hug without hesitation. You wrap your arms around his waist and inhale his sweet scent, melting into his warm embrace before you force yourself to let your arms fall from around his frame.
“Have a good rest of your weekend, girlfriend,” he smirks, backing towards his car. “I’ll see you on Monday!”
“Bye Harry!” you smile in his way before making your way inside.
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Not too willingly, but you talk to Oliver the next week about the double date. He sounds clearly surprised that you brought it up yourself and he tries to talk you down, but you’re now way too curious about what would go down, so he has no choice than to say yes. You fix the date to Saturday and Harry says it’s fine for him and that the two of you can go over to the frat house later, they are gonna have a small get together for one of the guys’ birthday. Not a party, more of a beer and pizza type of evening since Clyde, the birthday boy is not that big of a party animal.
The week passes by as usual, you spend some time with Sandra and a little more with Harry. Since you’ve started this whole dating thing, you’ve found yourself getting used to have him around. It doesn’t feel forced anymore, you actually like hanging out with him, have him beside you in the library even if you’re not even talking and whenever you spot him waiting for you in the morning or after one of your classes, you have this stupid smile on your face walking up to him, especially when he calls you girlfriend. Sandra’s warning words pop up in your head time to time, telling you to be careful with having actual feelings for Harry, but you keep telling yourself the two of you are nothing else than just good friends.
Saturday morning you get your nails done with Sandra, have some much needed girly time since you’ve had little of that lately, even a fake relationship needs a lot of time and energy, if you’re being honest.
Sandra catches you smiling down at a text that’s from Harry, he just joked about wearing a tux to the roller-skating rink and you imagined it right away, the picture of everyone else dressed casually while he is dressed for a royal ball is just hilarious.
“So how are things with Harry?” she asks from the chair next to you.
“What do you mean?” you ask, eyes fixed on your nails as the lady is carefully painting them a light pink color.
“You two are like glued together.”
“Yeah, I like spending time with him. And like, we are dating,” you smirk, finding it funny to just casually say it.
“You do know you don’t have to keep the act up with me, right?”
“I know, but we really are friends,” you nod.
“Just friends? Because sometimes being friends with someone is a bit more to you,” she comments and your face falls. She right away realizes it was a little harsh. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said it. I didn’t mean to be a bitch. I’m just trying to look out for you. I don’t want to see another guy taking advantage of you.”
“He is already taking advantage of me in a way, but it’s mutual,” you shrug, trying to mask the fact how much her words hurt. You’re still trying to get over the whole Oliver thing and though it’s been easier with Harry around, you still feel hurt over how badly he has been using you in the past years.
“And… you don’t have feelings for him?”
“We’re friends,” you tell her again.
“Yes, but you can have feelings for a friend too, Y/N.”
“I don’t really want to talk about it. We are doing fine, I enjoy being with him, that’s all.”
“Alright, I believe you. Just want to make sure you are not getting yourself into another Oliver situation.”
“I’m not. Harry is not him,” you firmly state and it’s the truth. Even if things go south with him, you can never see him do the things Oliver did. He is not him in the best possible way.
 For the double date you choose to wear your favorite pair of light-washed mom jeans with a tank top tucked into it and a colorful cardigan under your jacket. Harry texted you that he would pick you up at six and because you are ready by half past five, you sit around in your room a little anxiously. You honestly have no idea what’s gonna happen tonight, where it’s gonna head but you can only hope it won’t be scandalous. People already talk enough about you for dating Harry, you don’t need to be known about being the girl who made a scene at the roller-skating rink with her boyfriend and best friend. It wouldn’t do good to your reputation.
When Harry finally texts you letting you know he has arrived you rush down the stairs, still haven’t been able to shake your nerves off, but as soon as you spot him standing by his car, you kind of forget about everything else. He is wearing his usual skinny jeans with a black shirt, of course, the first few buttons left undone. His hair is getting longer, curls constantly falling into his forehead, but you love it. Makes him look soft and like… like a prince.
“Hey, ready to have fun?” he smirks at you, opening the door to the passenger seat to you.
“I don’t think I will ever be ready for this kind of fun,” you admit with a soft chuckle before getting into the car.
“I’ll be right there with you, okay? We’re gonna crush them,” he grins at you driving. “And we can just leave whenever you want to.” Reaching over the console he takes your hand and squeezes it gently. The gesture sends a shiver running down your spine. It feels so good to have his support, you wouldn’t want to do this with anyone else than him.
Oliver and Lexi are already at the arcade that’s connected with the skating place when the two of you arrive. She looks ecstatic about tonight and it’s almost kind of cute, you’re convinced you’d actually be friends with her if the two of you met under different circumstances.
“Hi! Thank you so much for coming! I know it’s not really your thing, but I’m so happy we can finally hang out!” she cheers, giving you a hug. Oliver and Harry shake hands and Harry gives Lexi a short hug while you just awkwardly nod in Oliver’s direction, already feeling anxious in his presence. Harry takes your hand walking in and squeezes it gently. Peeking up at him he gifts you with a warm smile that tells you: it’s gonna be alright, I’m here with you.
Once all four of you have changed your shoes to your skates and put your belongings to the lockers you head to the rink, you and Lexi in the middle, Harry on your other side while Oliver is on Lexi’s other side.
“Y/N, Oliver has told me a lot about you. What was it like, growing up with him?” Lexi asks as the four of you roll around. You’re not the worst at roller-skating, you can move confidently, but it seems like Harry is the best out of all of you, easily moving around, as if he were on his feet.
Thinking back at your time with Oliver now at Lexi’s question, it’s quite bittersweet. Because you are starting to realize things you didn’t see back then. Like how you were always in his shadow, he was always the guy everyone liked and you were just the girl that tagged along.
“Um, not sure what you want to know about,” you chuckle awkwardly as you watch Harry throw his ball for the first time.
“Was he a womanizer? Tell me the truth! He says he barely dated a few people,” she chuckles, taking Oliver’s hand. He is pretty much avoiding to look you in the eyes as you glance over him and you really wish she didn’t ask you about it.
“He had quite a few… flings,” you say, not entirely sure how to phrase it. He wasn’t a womanizer, but he did start to hook up with you between girls a while ago, making his reputation a little questionable.
“I knew you were downplaying it!” she playfully smacks his chest and you just bite into your bottom lip. This is already so awkward.
“I think Y/N is just exaggerating,” Oliver chimes in, seemingly not a fan of the conversation either.
“Sure, it’s always me,” you mumble under your breath.
Harry takes your hand and gets a little ahead of you before turning around so he is facing you while skating backwards.
“Hey baby, want me to teach you how to go in zig-zag?” he smirks, clearly wanting to ease the tension. Nodding you let him take both of your hands as the two of you stay a little back from Oliver and Lexi. “Don’t let him get under your skin. He is a fucking asshole,” he tells you when he knows they can’t hear him.
“Was he always like this? I have no idea how I could put up with his act,” you mumble with a scowl.
“Fuck them. Come on, let’s have a good time,” he grins before taking the lead.
Harry makes your forget about them so easily, like it’s not even a double date, just the two of you hanging out. He keeps teaching you moves, laughing together whenever you get wobbly. He catches you every time when you’re about to lose your balance, he doesn’t let you fall and every time his arms circle around you, keeping you on your feet steadily, you find yourself blushing at how close he is getting to you. His hands holding yours, small touches on your arms and back, he takes every chance to connect the two of you and you enjoy every second of it.
“Harry, no!” you laugh as he holds your hand, still going around.
“Come on! Just try it! Just a little jump!” he encourages.
“Do you want to see me fall?”
“I would have let you fall a long time ago if that’s what I wanted,” he smirks. He gets ahead of you again, both his hands taking yours and you still can’t get used to how soothing his palms feel against yours. “I’ll catch you this time too, don’t worry.”
“I swear you are trying to kill me,” you groan as you try to figure out how to do a little jump without breaking a bone. “But just a little one!”
“The tiniest one,” he chuckles nodding.
You let him take the lead and he starts pulling you again, skating backwards like he did all evening and when you feel like you’re stable enough, you give it a go.
Unfortunately, what happens is exactly what you were expecting. When your skates meet with the floor again after the little jump, you don’t find your balance and immediately feel your feet rolling out from under yourself. Harry reaches out for you, just like he promised, grabbing onto your arm with one hand while the other one presses into your back, but this time he can’t save you and you pull him with yourself as well. The two of you end up falling to the ground in a laughing mess as Harry is partially lying on you, an arm stuck under you while the other one is across your chest.
“I told you!” you cry out but it turns into laughter pretty fast.
“I’m sorry, baby, are you okay?” he asks laughing and your heart skips a beat at how he called you baby again and Oliver is not even around.
“I-I’m fine,” you breathe out as he peels himself off you, helping you up with him as well. He is so close to you as you finally stand on your feet again, your noses almost brush against each other as you blink up at him nervously.
It would be so easy to kiss him. You want to know what it’s like to feel his lips against yours. Maybe if you move just a little…
“Are you trying to break a bone, Y/N?” Lexi rolls up to you, totally breaking the moment as you both turn to her. Harry leaves an arm around you, hand resting on your waist and you lean against him to steady yourself on your wheels.
“It was Harry’s idea, but I knew I would terribly fail,” you chuckle slightly. Oliver appears behind Lexi, wrapping his arms around her waist from behind and you clench your jaw at the gesture. Harry must have noticed the shift in you, because he tightens his hold around you, his hand soothingly running up and down your side. And just like that, Oliver is long forgotten, you can only think about how it feels to have his fingers dancing on you.
“You were never really into athletic things, Y/N,” Oliver comments and you grimace.
“Just because I didn’t play any sports in high school, doesn’t mean I can’t try things now.”
“I think you did great,” Harry smiles down at you. “You just need a little more practice and you’ll be better than me, baby.”
Baby, there’s that pet name again. It’s doing things to you for sure.
Glancing over at Oliver you catch what looks like an eye-rolling and he genuinely looks annoyed by you and Harry and it’s making your blood boil at this point. Why can he be the only one to date someone? Why can’t you have a good time with someone? Now that you are thinking about it, he did it not only with guys, but also with anyone who tried to be friends with you. Oliver wanted him to be your only friend and sneakily ruined every friendship you ever had. Sandra is your first real friend other than Oliver, only because he couldn’t do anything against you forming any kind of relationship with your roommate. But you are now getting quite fed up with his little games and Harry might not be your real boyfriend, but you are friends with him and Oliver can do nothing about that.
Soon enough you decide you’ve had enough of the skating, so you move to the side and start changing back to your shoes. Lexi runs out to the restroom and while you are putting your sneakers back on Harry spots someone he knows, working at the buffet so he steps aside for a minute, leaving you and Oliver alone.
“Are you really dating him?” you hear him speak up and you can’t help the scowl on your face.
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“He is just so not the type of person you hang out with,” he comments with a shrug and your eyebrows shoot up.
“First of all, how would you know? My friends were always kind of more your friends, never really had the chance to find my people. And second, what’s the problem with him?”
“The problem is that we all know what he is like. Everyone on campus knows that Harry is famous for going after a lot of girls.”
“And you believe what others say? You know nothing about him. He is not what people try to make him appear to be, but you wouldn’t know, because you don’t know him like I do. And for the record, yes, I really am dating him and I’m very happy about it.”
You can tell he doesn’t like your reaction and he is probably fighting back to snap at you, but Harry soon returns, oblivious to the scene that just went down, however he can sense the shift in the atmosphere immediately.
“Everything alright?” he asks, seemingly innocently, but you know he is asking if Oliver has done something.
“Yeah. Can we leave?” you ask, not too keen on staying with Oliver any longer. It’s getting hard to imagine how you could ever put up with him and his act.
“Are you guys leaving? We could grab a bite together!” Lexi chimes in arriving back from the restroom. You are about to decline, but Harry speaks up before you.
“Oh, we have plans already, but maybe some other time,” he politely says, a hand on your lower back as he pulls you to his side and you’re thankful for his close presence now. If he weren’t there, you would have already jumped at Oliver’s throat probably.
“Oh, okay! I’m glad we got to do this though,” she smiles warmly, taking Oliver’s hand while you just chew on the inside of your cheeks, very keen on leaving as soon as possible.
Your force a smile on your face, bidding goodbye before Harry takes your hand and the two of you head out to his car.
“Hey, everything okay?” he asks when it’s finally just the two of you. Staring down at your hands on your lap, you bite into your bottom lip.
“Just… let’s leave. I had enough of Oliver for a life today,” you mumble and luckily, Harry doesn’t try to keep asking around, just starts the car and leaves.
On the way he asks if you still want to come over to the frat house and you say yes, because you feel like you could use the distraction. You’d rather spend some more time around him than go back to your dorm room and be alone with your thoughts.
Just as he promised, it’s nothing big, just a few close friends of some of the frat boys, pizza boxes are piled in the kitchen, music is playing in the background but it’s not blasting like when it’s a party. A big group is playing UNO in the living room using two deck of cards so the rounds don’t end too soon.
You and Harry get a slice of pizza, already starving after the skating and when you’re done with that, the two of you wander into the living room. There’s no more room left on the mismatched couches so Harry plops himself down to the ground and you stop for a moment, because there’s someone sitting on both of his sides, leaving not much space for you, but he is quick to solve the problem by taking your hand and pulling you down so you sit between his legs, your back pressed against his chest.
“Oh,” you breathe out from the sudden contact, but it feels nice. You cross your legs so his legs can bridge over them with his knees bent as he looks over your shoulders to see the game unfold.
“You guys want to play?” one of the girls asks.
“There’s not enough cards for the both of them to join!” another warns.
“We’ll just play together,” Harry speaks up from behind you and in the next round you join the game.
Harry rests his chin on your shoulder as his arms come around you, holding the cards so you can see them as well. It’s the closest he has been to you, basically wrapped around you and it’s definitely doing things to you. The way his chest warms your back, how you can feel every breath he draws because his face is so close next to yours, how his arms cage you gently, you are suddenly aware of even the smallest things.
“Pick one,” he murmurs when it’s your turn to throw a card in. You’ve been so occupied with him that you have no idea what color or number you should pick so you quickly check the deck in the middle before pointing at a red card. “Throw it in,” he tells you, pushing the card up with his thumb so you can take it and put it to the top.
Sitting here, on the floor of his frat house, his arms around you feels so much better than anything you’ve experienced with Oliver and the realization hits you hard in the chest. Turning your head to the side you let yourself take a good look at his perfect side profile, his chiseled jawline, the bridge of his nose and the little wrinkle between his eyebrows as he knits them together in focus, staring down at the cards in his hands. He catches you looking, his green eyes meet yours and a soft smile spreads across his face.
“What?”
“Nothing,” you shake your head.
“Everything alright?” he quietly asks and you nod.
“Yeah,” you breathe out turning back, but you still feel his lingering gaze on you for a few more moments before he turns away too.
You keep playing as the night moves on, drinking some beer, making you relax even more, though Harry’s closeness does the job just perfectly. Even when you are not sitting on the ground anymore, he always keeps close to you. Curling an arm around your waist when you stand in the kitchen talking with others, he keeps giving your hands and hips assuring little squeezes and you can’t help but lean into his touch every time. You want him close, you want to feel his touch, you love it when your eyes meet and he always shoots you a small smile, it makes your heart flutter, like you’re a little school girl with a silly crush.
Because now you are more than sure that you’re crushing on Harry. How can you not? He has been so good to you, did more than Oliver has ever done and you’ve been friends for just a few weeks.
You leave him for just a few minutes while you use the bathroom and as you return, you catch some of the conversation he is having with one of the boys, Jake.
“Dude, can’t believe the ladies’ favorite Styles is taken,” Jake laughs and it makes you scowl as you stop at the corner, listening on them.
“Jake, I told you to stop calling me that,” Harry huffs.
“I’m just telling you the truth. Every girl on campus is after you.”
“That doesn’t have anything to do with me being in a relationship.”
“I just thought that the womanizer Harry Styles wouldn’t settle again for a while.”
“Jake, I’m not a womanizer, stop this bullshit. Just because girls try to get together with me, doesn’t mean I want the same thing.”
You choose this moment to walk in, knowing well Harry must be losing his patience with Jake and his irrelevant accusations. Walking in you smile warmly at Harry, curling an arm around his waist as you lean into his side. His arm comes around your shoulders and he pulls you close. Jake eyes you with an unreadable expression before his gaze returns to Harry.
“Hope you know what you are doing, mate.”
“I surely do,” Harry firmly answers and it makes you smile, especially because you know what they’ve been talking about.
When Jake walks out you turn to face Harry, playfully poking his tummy as you glance up at him.
“Hey,” you smile up at him, your arms wrapping around his waist as his hands fall to your shoulders.
“Hey,” he chuckles. “Why are you so smiley?”
“I can’t smile?”
“Of course you can,” he smirks. “Want to go back a little more?” he asks nodding towards the living room where there are still quite a few people. You nod and let go of him, turning around you are just about to walk ahead but you didn’t see that a girl was coming inside and you bump right into her, the liquid from her cup spilling down your shirt.
“Shit!” you gasp jumping back, colliding a little with Harry’s chest and his hands immediately grab your waist in case you might lose your balance.
“Fuck, I’m so sorry!” the girl stutters, reaching for paper towels right away, but it helps nearly nothing.
“It’s fine,” you breathe out pressing your lips together.
“Come on, I’ll give you a shirt,” Harry tells you, taking your hand, walking you upstairs. The fabric of your shirt is turning cold against your skin and you really want to get rid of it.
Harry pulls out a simple black shirt for you and shows you the way to his little bathroom. Changing into his shirt you make an attempt to wash yours out, but it doesn’t do much to the sugary spill.
“Do you mind if I stay in it for the rest of the evening? I promise I’ll give it back next time we meet.”
“Sure,” Harry smiles and you catch his gaze wandering down your body, his shirt hanging loosely on your frame. “Do you still want to stay or do you want me to give you a ride back to the dorm?”
“Uh, maybe I should head home,” you nod to yourself.
“Is it okay if I take a quick shower? I feel so sweaty after the skating, just five minutes.”
“Sure, go ahead,” you nod smiling before he disappears in the bathroom.
You hear him turn the water on and walking over to his bed you lie down for a little, feeling the tiredness coming over you all at once. It’s been a long and exhausting day and listening to the soothing voice of the running water you find yourself drifting off to sleep before you could stop yourself.
When you open your eyes again the room is completely dark, but you quickly realize it’s not your dorm room; you’re still at Harry’s. Turning to the side you see him sleeping peacefully on the other side of the mattress, lying on his back. Still groggy with sleep, you realize you fell asleep while he was in the shower and he probably didn’t want to wake you so just went to bed next to you.
He looks like an angel sleeping, his green irises hidden from the world, thick lashes fanned over his cheeks, his pink lips slightly parted as his chest rises and falls peacefully. Sleeping in his bed, wearing his clothes, seeing him next to you, he is all you can think about and it brings a smile to your face.
Gently, you scoot closer to him, but still don’t touch him, however the movement makes him huff in his sleep and turning to his side his arm falls across your waist, making you gasp in surprise. You freeze, thinking that he might wake up any moment but it doesn’t happen and you’re stuck in his hold, not that you mind it. You push yourself a little closer, your nose almost touching his chest as you make yourself comfortable and closing your eyes you go back to sleep without a worry in the world.
Waking up you find yourself curled up to Harry’s side, one of his army around you while the other is holding your hand on his stomach. Blinking your eyes open you look around and take a few seconds to fully wake up. Harry feels so warm against you, but you think he might not like to find you all melted against him so you try to move away but his hold tightens around you.
“Mmm, stop movin’ around,” he mumbles sleepily.
“Sorry, I just thought that… you might feel hot,” you lie in a whisper.
“I am hot,” he smirks with his eyes still closed and his comment makes you laugh.
“And so full of yourself!” you chuckle and try to pull away once again, but he locks you to his side, not letting you break the position you are in.
“I said stop movin’! I like being warm in the morning,” he murmurs, snuggling you more to his side and you bite into your bottom lip as your smile stretches wider with each passing second.
Yeah, you definitely have a crush on Harry and you can’t even act like you don’t.
“Sorry for falling asleep in your bed,” you mumble, closing your eyes as you let your head rest on his chest.
“Y’ looked cute,” he huffs with a soft smile. “S’alright. Give me five minutes and I’ll be awake to drive you back to the dorm.”
You hum a response and just enjoy it while it lasts, not wanting to let him go anytime soon. But you have to. Slowly, the two of you get ready to leave, you want to change back to your stained shirt, but Harry tells you to just keep the shirt, he has two more of the exact same one so you walk out of the frat house wearing Harry’s shirt, holding Harry’s hand and get into Harry’s car. He is everywhere and you absolutely love it.
“So we have this game next weekend and I thought you might want to come? You don’t have to if you absolutely hate football, I just thought—“
“I would love to,” you say cutting his rambling short as he smiles with his eyes staring ahead at the road.
“Cool. Bring your roommate if you want.”
“Sure,” you smile.
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Football has never been your thing, but watching Harry is, so the game turns out better than you expected. Sandra tags along and luckily, she knows a little more about the game than you do, so you can ask her questions whenever you are completely lost about the happenings. Though you don’t know much about what a good player should be like, but it’s still clear to you that Harry is one of them. He scores half the points of his team and you are guessing that’s quite fascinating.
“Am I just dreaming or does he keep looking your way?” Sandra questions after you also just caught Harry’s gaze on you a moment ago.
“So what if he is?” you ask with a shy smile, eyes glued to his running frame on the field.
“Are you guys like… really together?”
“No,” you shake your head. “We are just friends,” you add, the term tasting a little bitter on your tongue.
“But you want more.” It’s not a question, Sandra can see right through you. Glancing at her you let out a huff before turning back at the game.
“It’s hard not to,” you truthfully admit, your eyes following Harry’s every movement on the field. Looking around you see that you are probably not the only one. Half of the girls on the bleachers are staring at him and you can’t even blame them. You have to be blind and stupid at the same time not to like him and apparently, you’re neither.
They win, no surprise. The whole team goes crazy as they score their last point and it puts them in the lead in the last minute. Everyone is cheering and screaming at the boys as they are celebrating their victory, along with Harry.
Jake starts running up and down the bleachers shouting that they are throwing a victory party at the frat house so now you know what you’re gonna do for the rest of the evening. As the team makes its way back towards the locker rooms Harry runs up to you, all sweaty and grinning crazily.
“Hey, you coming for the party, right?” he asks, still breathing heavily from the game.
“Sure,” you chuckle.
“Yes! You guys want a ride?” he asks in excitement glancing at Sandra beside you.
“That would be nice,” she nods happily.
“Alright, meet me at my car in fifteen,” he breathes out and before he runs away, he leans down and presses a kiss to your cheek, then leaves in a rush, catching up with the other guys. Suddenly, it feels a lot hotter than before…
“Okay, there’s no way he is not into you too,” Sandra mumbles to you as the two of you head out to the parking lot.
“You think so?”
“Oh, I know so,” she laughs, folding her arms on her chest. “That guy is like a puppy in love around you.”
“What if it’s just his normal?”
“I don’t know, is it? You’re the one who spends every possible minute with him,” she points out and she is right. This wasn’t like this before and as far as you know, he was never like this with anyone either. The only person you saw him act similarly was Naomi when they were dating, so could this be a hint for you that he feels the same way?
You’re still chewing on it when Harry emerges from the building, carrying his huge sports bag on his shoulder, his locks still wet from the shower he must have taken, his smile is still as wide as it was after the game.
“Ladies, fancy a ride?” he asks and as he walks past you he squeezes your hand gently before rounding the car and sitting behind the wheel.
By the time you arrive to the frat house the party is already on, music blasting in the living room where not so long ago you were playing UNO, sitting in Harry’s arms, booze is piling in the kitchen and more and more people are showing up.
“Hey, can you come up with me to drop my bag off and change?” Harry asks upon walking into the house and you nod. Sandra gives you a look that says ‘man up and talk to him’ before you take Harry’s hand and the two of you head upstairs.
“Be honest, did you bore yourself to death at the game?” Harry asks when you’re in the safety of his room.
“It wasn’t that bad, though I definitely need to learn more about the rules,” you chuckle admitting as you sit on the edge of his bed while he moves around, putting away his stuff. You watch him with a fluttering heart as you think about your conversation with Sandra. Even if she is right, how do you bring it up? You can’t just simply drop that you would like to turn your fake relationship into something real, you are not ballsy enough for that anyway.
“I’ll change quickly and we can head out,” he smiles, grabbing his usual skinny jeans and a white shirt from his dresser before disappearing in his bathroom.
While he is in there, you try to build your courage up to have the talk with him. Now seems like a good time, you’re alone in his room, no audience in case he rejects you painfully so no one would witness your breakdown. Chewing on the inside of your cheeks you stand up and start pacing the floor, stopping when the door opens and he walks out, smiling at you warmly as he fixes the dog tag around his neck.
“Everything alright?” he asks, tilting his head to the side.
“I, uhh… I wanted to talk about something,” you start shyly, fidgeting with the hem of your shirt.
“Okay, go for it,” he nods walking closer.
“I just, I’M not sure how to bring this up, and I hope it won’t sound weird. But I’ve been thinking about, um—I thought about this, what we’ve been doing and I realized that I—“
Your rambling speech gets interrupted when Jake bursts into the room without even a knock or warning word.
“Dude, come down! We need you on our beerpong team!” he urges Harry who gives him an annoyed look.
“Jake, don’t just fucking barge into my room without knocking!” Harry snaps at him.
“Like I haven’t seen your dick before,” Jake snorts and you feel the heat crawling up your neck at even just the thought of Harry naked.
“I don’t fucking care, knock!”
“Okay!” Jake growls rolling his eyes. “But you gotta come down now!”
Harry looks back at you, knowing well you two were in the middle of a conversation, but Jake’s arrival threw you off completely.
“Go, we can… talk later, it’s not that important,” you smile at him weakly.
“Are you sure?” he asks, his hand taking yours.
“Yeah, totally. Just go and celebrate your win,” you chuckle and with that, the moment is already gone.
You return to the party and while Harry gets sucked into an epic beerpong game, you join Sandra in the living room, who eyes you with a curious look, but you just shake your head.
“Don’t even ask,” you mumble and grabbing her drink from her hand you take a big swig from it, hoping the alcohol might help you with your anxious thoughts.
An hour later you feel the buzz, but you’re not at all drunk, just a little… braver than usually. You’ve moved to the kitchen with Sandra and a few girls, you’re sitting on the counter, nursing another drink as you listen to one of the girls rage about her asshole ex. Glancing out of the kitchen your eyes find Harry standing in the living room and for your surprise he was already watching you. You catch his smile, his focus completely on you when the guys are talking to him in his little circle, but he doesn’t seem to care. His gaze brings the heat back into your body, he can make you go nuts with just a look and you want to hate him for that, but you can’t. There’s nothing you hate about this guy.
“Stop eyefucking your man and just… fuck him for real” Sandra chuckles leaning closer to you, so only you can hear her words.
“Sandra!” you gasp, smacking her in the boob knowing well she hates it when you do that. She just cackles, returning to the discussion with the girls.
Soon enough, you see Harry moving towards your little group, creeping his way into the kitchen, stopping right beside you, leaning on one arm, his hand placed dangerously close to your thigh on the counter.
“Hi,” he smiles with his rosy cheeks, he surely has drunk some as well, but he doesn’t seem drunk either.
“Hi,” you breathe out, feeling flustered by his closeness again, a smile stretching across your face as he keeps eyeing you grinning. “What?”
“Have I told you how cute your smile is?” he asks and now you’re sure you’ve turned into a tomato.
“No,” you mumble shyly and almost gasp when his hand moves from the counter to your thighs as if it was the most natural thing, but it sends a shiver down your spine.
“Well, it is cute,” he chuckles, before turning his attention at the conversation in the little circle, but his hand remains still on your thigh.
From there, the situation escalates pretty easily. All it takes him to get between your thighs is to reach for one of the drinks on the counter next to you, his hand still resting on your thigh, and as he is done with the drink, he places it to the counter, his other hand coming to your other thigh, now standing facing you between your legs. Before you could say anything, he pulls on you a little, so you press up against him, your hands instantly coming to grab onto his shoulders to steady yourself in the movement.
“Hi again,” he smirks with glistening eyes.
“You didn’t go anywhere,” you chuckle quietly, your fingers dancing up to the back of his neck, playing with his curls.
“I know, but it made you smile and that’s what I wanted,” he smirks, so proud of himself. He licks his lips and you catch his gaze wandering down to yours, instantly making you nervous as you think back at the failed conversation you had with him not so long ago. This feels like a moment that could head into a direction you are dying for, but without the talk, you’re not sure if you should take the risky step.
Good thing that Harry is not shying out of it. Pressing forward his forehead meets yours, noses muzzling together as his lips linger so close to yours. You suck on your breath, arms curling around his neck as you wait for him to move the last millimeters between the two of you, and seeing that you are not pulling back, Harry makes the final move.
His lips move perfectly against yours, so warm and welcoming, soft and intoxicating, kissing him feels like a gift from above. He is taking his time with you, tasting and savoring you and you’re definitely not complaining. You could spend the rest of your life kissing him and you’d be fine with it.
One of his hands stays on your thigh, keeping a firm grip on it while the other one moves up to cup your cheek as you angle your head to reach him perfectly. He licks into your mouth without warning and you almost let out a moan at the sensation, but you’re just too busy returning his kisses.
You have absolutely no idea how long you stay like that, kissing and touching each other, but when he pulls back, you can’t help the stupid grin on your love drunk face. Harry’s expression kind of mirrors yours as he pecks your swollen lips once more before getting back to his previous position, his hand never leaving your thigh and you hug his strong, tattooed arm, needing to touch him in any kind of way as the two of you reenter the discussion that never stopped. Sandra gives you a wide-eyed stare and you just bite into your bottom lip, turning into a giggly teenage girl all of a sudden.
For just a few minutes you are absolutely convinced the kiss was real, but that’s all you got. As you look into the living room you catch Naomi’s burning stare and it tells you right away she witnessed the whole scene and to make it even worse, Oliver was standing not too far, glaring at you firmly and they make you think.
What if Harry saw them near and kissed you just to mess with them? What if it was all just part of the act? You should have pressed more earlier and have that damned talk with him, how are you supposed to ask now if he meant it or not?!
The more you think about it, the more painful it becomes and the little evil voice in your head convinces you that he didn’t mean it. It’s not like you want to believe it, but you can’t ignore the possibility that slowly grows into reality in your clouded mind.
You lose both Harry and Sandra at one point after going to the bathroom and though you know they are somewhere around, you feel like you can’t stay any longer at the party. Before anyone could stop you, you sneak out of the house and head back to the dorm, hoping that a good night sleep would get your head straight.
Harry tries to call you, but you ignore them all, heading straight to bed when you arrive. You feel guilty for leaving without a word but there’s just too much going on in your head, you need time to process and figure out what to do.
You’re still up when Sandra arrives back but you pretend to be asleep, not feeling like dealing with her investigating questions about the kiss and why you left so suddenly. It takes over an hour for you to finally fall asleep and escape your buzzing thoughts.
Waking up you see no sign of Sandra and you remember she mentioned that her brother is visiting town so they might spend the day together. Amazing opportunity to bury yourself into your deep loneliness and try to figure out what to do.
Harry has been nonstop texting you, asking if you even made it back to the dorm safely and you just shoot him one message to let him know you’re still alive and then ignore him again. Thinking back at the kiss last night your heart flutters every time, you can still feel the touch of his lips, the way his hand cupped your cheeks, it’s driving you crazy. But then you remember seeing Naomi’s and Oliver’s face and you’re convinced Harry saw them too and you always get to the same conclusion: the kiss was just part of the act.
You barely leave the bed the whole day, lying under your covers and watching Netflix until your mind feels numb enough to stop torturing you with your thoughts. And then, there’s a knock on the door. You freeze, knowing well that whoever is on the other side, you don’t want to see them.
“Y/N, I know you’re in there, I heard you watching The Vampire Diaries,” Oliver’s voice calls out from outside and you let out a shaky breath.
Dragging yourself out of the bed you open the door and stare back at him with a blank expression.
“What do you want?” you simply question.
“I broke up with Lexi,” he answers and your eyebrows shoot up. Without asking for permission he pushes his way into the room, stopping in the middle with his hands on his hips. “Last night, I broke up with her.”
“I uhh—I’m sorry, I guess, but why? She was so sweet.”
“I miss you, Y/N,” he blurts out and your shock just raises. Did he just admit to breaking up with his girlfriend because of you?!
“What?”
“Lexi is a nice girl, but I miss you, I miss what we had.”
“And what is that supposed to be?” you ask with a bitter chuckle as you fold your arms on your chest. “You miss fucking me whenever it’s convenient for you? Because I certainly don’t miss that.”
“We both know it was more than that, Y/N,” he smiles warmly, but it makes your stomach churn. Nothing about that smile is friendly or nice, he is trying to manipulate you like so many times before, but it’s not working now. He lost his power over you.
“It wasn’t. You were using me, Oliver.”
“That’s not what it was. We were having fun!”
“I wasn’t! I had feelings for you and you used them for your benefit!” you snap at him, not in the mood to play by his rules any longer. You’ll not let him bring you down again. “A friend doesn’t do that.”
“You could have spoken up against it, but I didn’t hear you complaining,” he retorts and it feels like a slap across your face. “I know you miss it too, Y/N. You don’t have to act like you are into Harry, I can see through you.”
“Oh really?” you snort, finding his words rather comedic. He knows or sees absolutely nothing and he just proved it. “Tell me then what you see!”
“I see that you’ve been trying to make me jealous and I’m gonna give it to you, it was successful.”
“Amazing, only problem is that I never wanted to make you jealous. My feelings for Harry are more real than the ones I had for you and I would really like it if you just left right now.”
Grabbing the doorknob you hold it open for him, wanting nothing more than to get rid of him for once and for all. You’ve had enough of his toxic, manipulating ass for a lifetime.
“Are you really kicking me out and just gonna choose him over me?” he huffs in disbelief and you can tell you’ve hurt his ego pretty badly.
“I’m choosing myself and doing what’s best for me. Now leave,” you demand and he finally moves. Walking past you he stops and looks down at you one more time.
“You’re a fucking waste of time,” he sneers before walking out and you need every ounce of power in you not to go after him and punch him in his arrogant face. How could you ever consider him even a friend, let along sleep with him?! He is the most disgusting and degrading asshole you’ve ever seen and you’ll work on forgetting about his whole existence for the rest of your life.
You shut the door behind him and leaning your back against it you slide down to the floor, feeling your chest tightening at the intensity of what just happened. You lost the person you loved the most just weeks ago and realized that he was never who you thought him to be.
You feel like crying for a little, but the tears never come. Instead, a soft sense of relief washes over you, like a weight has been lifted off of your shoulders, finally setting you free. One less thing to worry about.
As you push yourself up from the floor you hear fractions of a heated conversation outside and when you recognize both voices, your heart stops beating for a moment. Opening the door you hear the conversation between Oliver and Harry now fully clear.
“Stop fucking acting like you are the center of her world, Styles. She has no fucking idea what she wants,” Oliver snaps at Harry, clearly upset about something he said earlier.
“No one thinks that but you! Stop harassing her like a fucking psycho!” Harry fights back and your lips part at how he stands up for you.
“You’re the one harassing her! Don’t think for a moment you have a chance with her, she wants me, not you! You’ll never get into her pants like I did—“
Just when you’re about to barge out of the room to end whatever parade they are having, Oliver’s groan fills the hallway and as you step out, you see him fall to the ground after Harry’s has punched him right in the face.
“What the fuck?!” you snap in shock and they both turn to look at you in the middle of their fight.
“Your fucking boyfriend punched me for no reason!” Oliver spats, pushing himself up, holding a hand to his jaw that’s already turning red.
“Stop making yourself the victim, Oliver, no one buys it!” you groan at him as you step to Harry. He seems ashamed, even scared of your reaction about the fact that he just punched Oliver, but you are not gonna blame him. He did God’s work in this case.
“I can’t fucking believe you’re still taking his side!” Oliver snaps angrily. “You know what? You two deserve each other.”
“Shut up and leave!” you shout at him before grabbing Harry’s wrist and pulling him towards your room.
You hear Oliver mumbling something under his breath, but you couldn’t care less, shutting the door at him once again, this time with Harry in the room with you.
“Y/N, I’m sorry, I just fucking lost my temper and—“ You wave him off, taking his hand in yours softly, taking a look at his knuckles.
“It’s fine,” you smile at him. “Does it hurt?” you ask, gently running your thumb over his reddened knuckles.
“No, it’s alright,” he murmurs, standing so close to you again. His green eyes search yours as his other hand reaches under your chin to lift your head. “You have been ignoring me since last night.”
“I just… had a lot of stuff to do,” you awkwardly answer clearing your throat.
“You sure it’s not because of what happened between us?”
“What? Of course not!” you huff. “I get it, you were just trying to make it convincing because Naomi and Oliver were both watching a-and so you just—“
“What?” Harry asks tilting his head to the side.
“I mean, that’s why you did it, right? I saw them after we—uhh after we you know, kissed.”
“Okay, I didn’t see them and that’s not why I did it,” he admits with a nervous chuckle as he rubs the back of his neck. “I thought we were on the same page, but apparently not. Y/N, nothing I did recently was because of Naomi or Oliver. If I’m being honest it hasn’t been about them for a while. I really like you and I know I should have talked to you first about it, because now it was all kind of confusing, but I wasn’t faking it. I meant everything I said and did.”
You stare back at him in awe, heart pounding against your chest as his words sink in. He wasn’t acting, the kiss was real and you’ve been acting like a lunatic since last night, completely ignoring him instead of just talking to him, you are such a dumbass!
“Really?” you breathe out, barely more than just a whisper.
“Yeah,” he chuckles softly. “And I kinda thought you feel the same way, but then I came here and ran into Oliver who told me you two just had a chat about… possibilities between you and him?”
The hurt is clear in his eyes and your hatred towards Oliver is not on maximum level. You can’t believe he tried to ruin it all one last time even after you told him you want nothing to do with him.
“That’s not what we talked about,” you shake your head. “He came here, told me he broke up with Lexi and that he misses me, but I told him that’s too bad because I don’t miss him and his stupid little games anymore.”
“Oh!”
“And he tried to convince me to choose him over you, but I already chose you, so he had no chance,” you add, a wide smile spreading across your face as you see him realize what you just said.
“What, does this mean…?” he questions with sparkling eyes as he starts inching closer to you.
“Last night, when Jake barged into your room, this is what I wanted to talk to you about. That I’m not really faking anything anymore, but we were rudely interrupted and then… you kissed me and I thought things were finally going right, but then I somehow convinced myself that it was just because you saw Naomi and Oliver around and tried to upset them.”
“Fuck them!” Harry laughs, his hands finally reaching to grab you by your waist as he pulls you against him. “I don’t care about them anymore. I just want to be with you, no faking, no acting, just… you and me.”
“That sounds… perfect,” you admit with a tired smile before he finally leans down and presses his lips against yours.
“I have a warning for you, Y/N,” he mumbles between kisses, his lips moving against yours.
“Yeah? What’s that?” you hum, melting into him.
“I will not stop kissing you. It’s my new favorite thing,” he giggles, hands pulling you even tighter to him.
“Oh, how upsetting!” you chuckle without a care in the world before the two of you fall to your bed, a mess of kisses and giggles, but not an ounce of faking.
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thora-jane · 3 years
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Lasso The Moon (Tenth Doctor x female!reader Oneshot)
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Weasley fic to bring you: a Tenth Doctor fic! I got a little bored and started writing this, and thought I'd share it with you all!
Summary: On a trip to the stars, you reflect a little on the feelings you have for the Doctor, and maybe he does the same thing.
Warnings: None!
Word Count: 1,294
“You and me. All of time. All of space. Just at our fingertips,” The Doctor began his spiel with grand excitement, gently taking his hand in yours and placing it on a rather large lever on the consol, “Where would you like to go?”
You had been traveling with the Doctor for years, and though he asked this question often, your response was almost always the same, “Let’s see the stars.”
He smiled drumming your fingers with his before gripping the lever tightly, “Then to the stars we go.” This time, the lever came down with a more violent jerk, causing you to fall against him for support as his free arm wrapped around you. And though you hated to admit it, you hesitated to stand on your own two feet again. Something about being with the Doctor, seeing his excitement, his kindness, his bravery, it was impossible to not fall for him.
But you knew he would never have feelings for you in return. He had traveled across the known universe and beyond. There was no way he could reciprocate the love you held for him. You learned to push past it though, and found that being his traveling companion was all you needed some days.
The TARDIS screeched to a halt, and after a moment’s hesitation the two of you took a step back. However, he kept your hand in his as he ran over to the door, flinging it open dramatically to reveal the Milkyway, “Now then, pick a star, any star,” he grinned, craning his head to look up at the vast expanse of galaxy.
“Actually Doctor, I know we usually go somewhere specific,” You began, leaning against the opposite end of the doorframe,” But I was hoping we could just...stargaze? If that’s alright with you?” You tore your gaze away from outside and turned back to him, pausing to read his face.
“Stargaze?” He scoffed, lightheartedness lacing his voice, “Why gaze at them when you can see them up close!” He said, turning to run back to the controls. But before he could leave, you reached out and grabbed his hand.
“Doctor, I’d much rather see the view from here. I know you think it boring, but I’ve wanted a view like this for as long as I can remember.” You explained softly, looking back out the door, “It’s truly gorgeous.”
He sighed, stepping back and leaning against the doorframe again, “You never really get tired of it,” he agreed, peering back out at the stars, “You said you studied the stars back at Uni on earth?”
You let out a chuckle, “Not exactly. I didn’t study them as a science, I more just romanticized them,” you looked back at him with a gentle smile, “It’s hard not to, I think.”
“Romanticized the stars?” He turned to you, an eyebrow raised.
“Yeah, look at them! It’s a dark sky filled with pinpricks of light! What’s not to love? It’s beautiful, it’s romantic. An endless space filled with violent flames but all we see are delicate little lights and the moon,” you couldn’t help but smile, reaching out and taking both his hands in yours, “What is it you want, Doctor? What do you want? You want the moon? Just say the word and I’ll throw a lasso around it and pull it down-”
“-Hey, that’s a pretty good idea,” The Doctor interrupted, stepping closer to continue the quote, “I’ll give you the moon.”
“I’ll take it,” you continued, impressed that he understood your reference, “What then?”
“Well, then you can swallow it, see, and then moonbeams will shoot out of your fingers and toes and the ends of your hair...Am I talking too much?” He squeezed your hands. “You aren’t the only one that’s romanticized the night sky, (y/n). I’ve been doing this for quite some time now.”
You felt your smile fade. He had been doing this for some time now. Probably with lots of other people. People he loved, not just people he traveled with. You dropped his hands and sat down in the doorway, “I suppose you have.”
“Oi, why the long face, this galaxy not good enough for you?” He asked, plopping down beside you, “No bother, we’ll just move on to the next one, or the next one, go back in time to find one, or jump ahead a few billion years, Whatever we need to find one that’s worth your love.”
“Doctor, have you ever been in love?” You asked abruptly
“Well that’s quite the loaded question, isn’t it?” He asked behind nervous laughter, “But I suppose I have. At least once or twice.”
“Is it frustrating? To know the person you love is far greater than you?” you folded your hands in your lap and looked down at the stars below you, swinging your legs out the door and letting them dangle through space.
“D’you remember when we first met?” he asked changing the subject, “You were parked outside of a restaurant in the middle of the night-”
“I was finishing the closer’s shift,” you laughed.
“You were standing in an empty street, staring up at the sky!” He laughed with you, placing a hand on yours, “I asked you-”
“You asked me what I was staring at, and I told you the stars. Then you asked-” “I asked you what was wrong with them and you said-”
“They’re too far away! They were!” you mock-defended, “How was I supposed to reach out to them when I was back on earth?” You asked, fake-punching the Doctor in the arm, trying to tame his laughter.
As his laughter died down with a sigh, he turned back at you, “It’s like longing for stars that are too far away. You might not be able to reach them but blimey, they’re beautiful. So some nights you’re just lucky to be able to see them, and thankful to have them there.” He looked out into the universe again.
“Yeah, That makes sense. I think I know what you mean,” You nodded slowly. But rather than looking at the stars, you found yourself looking at the man beside you.
“Do you think you’ll ever share love with someone? That you will love someone and they’ll love you and you can be happy together?” You asked, though in your heart it was more of a plea.
He didn’t say anything, and you felt your heart sank as a minute passed between you and the stars
“(y/n) I like to think I am,” he stated humbly.
“What?” you turned to face him abruptly.
“(y/n), I’m scared to think what could happen whenever we leave for a journey, but I don’t know who I’d be if I didn’t have you to protect.” His words started to stumble out of his mouth as he grabbed your hand, pulling him back with you into the Tardis and over to the controls, where he began pressing buttons and furiously flipping switches.
“Where are we going?” You asked desperately, trying to catch his eye.
After a moment, he took your hand in his. Placing it on the lever under his fingertips, he turned to you and declared, “You and me. All of time. All of space Just at our fingertips. And I’m going to go and lasso the moon for you.”
It took you a moment to realize what he meant, but you felt your face flush red.
“That’s a pretty good idea, (y/n), I’ll give you the moon.” He continued with a little hesitation. But before he had the chance to regret his words, you threw your arms around his neck. And with your face nestled into the crook of his shoulder, you mumbled.
“I’ll take it.”
182 notes · View notes
oikadori · 4 years
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A/N: No one asked for this but I really wanted to write some angsty fic...so this is the outcome of listening to Callum Scott and Conan Gray for three full days asfkasjk sorry this is the longest thing I’ve written Hope you like it!
Miya Atsumu x f!Reader
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Summary: He was your best friend and she was perfect, but still you fell for him
Genre: angst, unrequited love 
Warnings: self-doubt, insecurity, swearings 
Now playing: Dancing On My Own, Heather 
WC~2,6K
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You should already be used to hear it, but every time Atsumu let out a booming laugh you couldn’t help staring at him with dreamy eyes.
“Oi, Y/N!  Are you even listening to me?” his hazel eyes open, looking at you playfully.
“Yes, I’m hearing you, and no, it wasn’t as funny as you think” he frowns, pushing you from your chair almost making you fall if it wasn’t for his quick grip on your forearm, “You asshole!”
“Why so harsh on me today, sweetheart?”
Yo feel your stomach twist at the nickname, making Atsumu smile at the way your cheeks get a dark red.
“Because you were a total dick with those poor girls” he sighs, tired, stretching his arms behind his head, “You could’ve been nicer, you know?”
Biting your lip, you remember the teary eyes of those girls as they ran away sobbing after they had told him their love confession. Would you have the same luck if- No, no way you had a crush on him.
“They have a crush just on my looks, it’s annoying”, he spits, “Why do you care so much anyways?”
“I…-” he looks at you with curiosity as you carefully think your words, “-I guess I would feel horrible if I were them and confessed”
“Don’t tell me you have a crush on someone Y/N”
“Of course not, all of you ,men, are idiots”, he place his hand on his chest with a wounded look, making your eyes roll, a smile tickling your lips, “Now, hurry with your homework, you’re stealing my lunch time”
He reaches for his bag, taking out his lunch box to hand you the extra Onigiri he had. You smile fondly even if it is not the first time he brings you food during your study sessions.
He was your best friend, yet his gestures never failed to dazzle you.... Maybe you do have a crush on him.
 ///
You enter the gym with a tired look, a yawn slips pass your lips before sitting on the bleachers, you plug your earbuds and take out an unfinished assignment from your bag. The second years wave at you, Atsumu sticking his tongue out, you wave back before locking eyes with him and returning the gesture, making the setter grin.
The next time you lift your eyes from your work, you open them wide before taking off your earbuds to listen to the scene in front of you.
A girl wearing the team’s jacket enter the gym alongside the captain, making it feel as if the time stop. The team look at them in surprise as she bows.
“I’m eager to be your new manager! I used to play but-” she points at her wrist with a shy smile,” I got pretty bad injured so I hope I can be helpful here”, you advert Atsumu’s gaze, making your heart flinch a little.
“I’m Miya Atsumu, setter, I haven’t see ya around before” the girl looks at him with an eager look, leaning closer, a happy smile on her face as Atsumu stands still, the smirk on his face fades as she erases the gap between them. ‘The hell is she doing?’
“Oh, I know you! The star setter, guess what they say about you is truth-”, you wait for the usual compliments girls told him all the time, your lips curve up a little remembering Atsumu’s usual reaction at them, “-your serves are truly monstrous, your technique is impeccable”
His eyes glimmer with curiosity and you notice the light blush on his cheeks as he gives her his best smile. In all the years you’ve known him, you’ve seen him flirting with girls, hooking up with one before getting another, but this…this was different.
You stand up before properly thinking what you are doing. You haven’t felt jealous before and you didn’t have the right for it, but an overwhelming despair sets the pace of your feet as they move towards them.
“I used to be a setter myself but-“
“Hey, Tsumu, see you after practice to finish our chemistry homework?” you peek your head between them, making the girl take a few steps back, a surprise look on her face. Atsumu looks at your innocent smile and blinks.
“Y/N, I told you not to call me that in practice-” he whispers to you, hiding it with a few coughs, “Uhmm, sure” the couch calls them and he waves at you before jogging off with the new manager to line up with the rest.
Your eyes linger on them a few more seconds, he laughs with her, making you furrow your eyebrows together, noticing just now, how beautiful she was.
///
“You still look like crap”
“Shut up, Samu!
You stand between the twins near the main door of the cafeteria, watching Atsumu run his hand through his hair multiple times as he stares at his reflection on one of the windows ‘All that… for her?’
A voice that comes from behind you, makes Atsumu look over your shoulder with a nervousness you haven’t seen before.
“Tsum Tsum!”
He gasps at the sight of her, the short dress she is wearing frames her figure perfectly, and you can’t help to look at your own clothes wondering if you couldn’t have dressed more casually.
You remain silent as she reaches for his hair and ruffles it friendly, the display in front of you feels surreal, suddenly your limbs are numb and your eyes can’t seem to drift away from Atsumu’s happy smile as he grabs her wrist to kiss her hand.
“You look stunning”
“What a gentleman – Oh, hey ‘Samu and-“
“Y/N” the words come sharper than you intended, the girl just let out an innocent giggle
“I’m so sorry! I don’t get to see you a lot in school, you’re in the advanced classes, right?”
“Y/N is a genius, they wouldn’t allow me to play if it wasn’t for her”, Atsumu says pointing at you with pride while his other hand rests on the small of her back guiding her to your table. A lump forms on your throat, making it impossible for you to reply, you  manage to pull an empty smile.
On the table you are silent as ever, nodding at all the conversations the second years try to include you in. Your mind is already far away, wondering all the possibilities that could happen if you were brave enough to confess right there, right now, but the sight in front of you snaps you to reality again.
Atsumu lips gets stained by some red sauce and before you can point it out, she licks her thumb before pressing it on his lips. His cheeks turn bright red and his jaw slightly slacks open.
“How is that you aren’t already dating? It’s been almost three months since you are all over each other” Suna casually says
Three months indeed, and she entered more and more in their small circle. But how could you stop it when she was just…so lovely?
 Atsumu stayed until much later in practice but still you chatted together. Late night texts, becoming in late night calls to check up on each other.
‘I want to ask her out. Fuck, I want her so badly, but what if she rejects me, Y/N!’
‘Tsumu, you’re Japan’s top high school setter. Believe me, she won’t reject you’
Now you want to hit your head against the nearest wall, remembering your stupid words.
“Would you say yes if I ask you out?” 
“I would say yes to more than that” the table falls dead silent at her words as if they waited for the next scene of a movie.
 Suddenly Atsumu press his lips against hers with ferocity, she pulls the collar of his shirt, deepening the already heated kiss. You almost choke on your water, earning a concern look from Kita, you find yourself standing up violently before rushing to the restroom.
You close the door behind you before looking at yourself in the mirror, ‘I could have never competed with her’. You bite your lip, and shut your eyes tightly, your hands grasping both sides of the sink, you let your head fall forwards, eyes fixed on the white of the porcelain as they water.
“Y/N, are you okay?” you stiffen at the soft female voice coming from the other side of the door, “Do you need help?”, you let out an humorless laugh. ‘A sweetheart with everyone, huh?’
“I-I don’t feel good, it’ll better if I head home. Please tell the others, I had an emergency or something” your throat feels extremely dry all of sudden and your voice comes out shaky.
“Oh! I can take you home-“
“I’ll rather go alone! I don’t know if I’m sick and I’d hate to…infect you. Thank you, tho”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes”
“Okay…text me when you get home!”
When you hear the footsteps fading away, you wait a few more minutes to walk out the restroom, just to find Atsumu talking cheerfully, his eyes filled with adoration for her. He didn’t even look at your direction as you left the cafeteria, and in that very moment you realized he would never look at you that way.
 ///
“Where is Y/N, I haven’t seen her in years?”
“I think she is tutoring some first years”
“Oh” Atsumu finds himself looking at your usual spot on the bleachers, he barely got to see or talk to you in the recent weeks. 
You’ve been missing his calls on purpose. Since that dinner, you had to put all your energy to smile at him when he waved at you in the corridors as he held her hand. It had been almost a month of hearing him talking about how gracious she was and weeks of looking how they made out on the couch in the end of the library or against one of the gym’s walls.
You thought that if you put distance with him, you’ll manage to get over that soreness that felt heavy on your chest each time she made him laugh. But no matter how many extra classes you took or how many first years you tutored, your mind always came back to Inarizaki’s setter.
The sky was dark by the time you finished tutoring the last first year, he bowed at you and you gave him a brief smile before locking the classroom. You handled the keys to your teacher and walked out of the building.
The cold wind hit your face, making you shiver, you search for your jacket in your bag, finding only a scarf. Atsumu gave it to you. You haven’t used it in a while now, but the cold was too much to bear with for your thin uniform. You place the material carefully around your neck, caressing the fabric begore sighing, watching your breath fading into the air and start walking.
“Oi” his voice makes you turn instantly, and you catch him jogging to you, “It’s fucking cold out here!- Uh, you still have it?” he points at your neck with a cheeky grin.
Atsumu looks extremely handsome like this, a little pink on his nose and cheeks and the few lights highlight the hazel of his eyes. It makes you gulp before replying.
“Of course, I do. It was my first two-digit birthday!”, he laughs remembering the chaos you both made by that age, you smile a little before looking at him with concern, “What are you still doing here? Something happened?”
“No! I-I just wanted to walk home with you, like we used to” he looks at the ground and sighs, “I know you’re busy, but I missed ya” the words make your heart warm even when you can’t stop shivering, “You are freezing” he takes his volleyball jacket and place it over your shoulders
“No, I’m fine, really. You should-”
“Stubborn as always. What am I supposed to do with your freeze corpse?”, you huff, putting the jacket on as he starts walking.
“What about your girlfriend?”
“She already left, don’t worry she knows you’re my best friend, she won’t act bitchy at you” you just nod and start walking alongside the setter, not caring about the sting that ypu just felt in your heart.
The walk is long and awkward, Atsumu finally getting hit by the way your friendship had changed. Your brief answers and forced smiles make him more and more annoyed, becoming more silent with each minute.
You didn’t have the energy to keep up with his drollery, each time you looked at him you just felt the urge to be held by him and tell him the painful truth: You didn’t have a crush on him. No.  You loved him.
“What is wrong with you?” he says, suddenly stopping.
“Excuse me- “
“If you don’t want to be friends with me anymore, just say it! Jesus!”, his exasperated tone makes your eyes narrow, “-But don’t have me fooling around, worrying about you for almost a month” your mouth twitches downwards as you realize your indifference had hit a spot on his pride. 
For a solid minute you don’t hear anything, you just stare at him with a flood of thoughts rushing through your head until you manage to pull one of them out into a dry whisper.
“We shouldn’t be friends anymore- “his clenched fists loosen, and he watches your lips carefully, “I can’t do it anymore – thought I could but…is too much”,
The crack of your voice makes you stop for second, giving you time to gain a little bit more of air before feeling again as if you were drowning.
“I can’t be friends with you anymore, because I want you!… The worst part is that she is so FUCKING perfect!” your arms move in the air letting out all the feelings you had bottled up.
“I thought I could brush away the feeling, but I realize – I  love you, Atsumu” his mouth opens slightly not able to produce a sound as your arms fall to your sides, a tear streaming down your cheek.
You take his jacket off, the cold air embracing your body, but you can’t care less. He motions to you, but you lift your hand, stopping him.
“Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Would it have changed anything?” his silence tells you all you needed, making your heart clench, “That – That’s what I though…It’s okay, really. I wouldn’t choose me either” your breath becomes irregular and you bite your lip, capturing a sob, “This is my fault, falling in love with you…If being friends makes you happy, I-I will do my best to be your friend, then”
Atsumu was usually selfish with the things he wanted and proud about the things he made but seeing you there, shivering with red eyes and swollen lips, made his heart ache.
And he couldn’t be less proud about the things he was about to say.
“You were right before. We shouldn’t be friends anymore. I do not want to deal with you being in love with me and my girlfriend”, you hiccup, fixing your sore eyes on his, “You made things so fucking complicated, it’s better to end this now”, he hiss, gritting his teeth, waiting for you to storm out.
 But when he feels your cold lips on his cheek, he bites his bottom lip harshly.
“Sorry, I never meant-”, ‘To fall for you’, it takes all his will power to not envelope you in his arms, so he only turns his face away, hearing your sobs. He loved you but not the way you did. “-to mess us up”
You walk away quickly, tears running down your cheeks as you press your hand firmly against your lips, drowning the uncontrollable sobs. Atsumu stands there watching you disappear into the coldness of the night, shutting his eyes tightly, understanding, he had lost his best friend.
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jishyucks · 4 years
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Eight Count ‣ lmh
‣ genre: fluff, enemies-to-lovers, hogwarts!au, I think it's a slow burn
‣ wc: 10.8k
‣ summary: "There's honestly no way Minho would like me. And me of all people would know that." ; in which fate decides to be an ass and make you and Minho dance partners
‣ an: I'm sosososo sorry @ whoever requested this bc of how long it took. I didn't mean for it to be so long but it kept going and uni is to blame bc all of the work :(( but anyways enjoy !!
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i.
You feel the beat of your heart quicken as you maneuver through the maze of corridors that you had begun to approach. Time was ticking. The first classes of the day had already started about half an hour ago, and here you were, racing down the stone hallways, tardy and a bit dazed.
It had only been a mere five minutes since you had woken up in the dormitories in pure panic, the realization that everyone had left and you were still cuddled up against one of the pillows in your bed driving you to act quick. You could accuse your housemates of not even bothering to check if you were alive, but you soon decided to place the blame on your body's restlessness and inability to go to sleep when you wished. You wouldn't call it insomnia, but your sleeping patterns weren't normal either.
Approaching the dance room with a quiet sigh of relief, you tug at the wooden door and peek in, hoping that you weren't barging in at such a humiliating time.
Scattered around the rather room, students were paired in twos. Each couple's bodies had been facing each other, hands sitting awkwardly in the other's while their faces were turned towards the dance instructors, Professor Shin and Professor Na. By the look on Professor Shin's face, it was evident that she was about to continue speaking, but the door swinging open had caught her attention.
"Ahh Y/N, nice of you to finally join us," she clasped her hands in genuine excitement, passion towards dance obviously bubbling up inside of her.
You grinned crudely and bowed your head, "W-what should I do, Professor?" Spotting your best friend Felix within the group of students, he tried his best to send you a look of 'we were supposed to be partners'. You shot him an apologetic expression back before turning your attention back to both professors.
After a brief pause in thought, Professor Na's face lit up, "Ah yes! Lee Minho lacks a partner as of now!" Following the eyes of your teacher, they brought your line of sight to the far corner of the room where Minho had been sitting. At the mention of his name, he raised his head to see that everyone had been gaping back at him in what seemed like total silence.
A sharp intake of air through your nose had replicated a gasp, eyes growing wide, "P-pardon?" Out of all the boys in the class, an amount you couldn't keep track of with your fingers, you had to end up with Lee Minho? The human embodiment of a wet sock?
Minho was… unbearable, to say the least. It wasn't that he had done something for you to hate him, which made you seem like a bad person, but in all honesty, your guys' personalities didn't seem to match. He was too arrogant, in your opinion. He has this energy that he carries that really didn't sit well with you, and by the looks of it, the feeling was mutual. It was as if you both ended up on the opposite bc end of everything.
It really doesn't help that you're a Hufflepuff, and he's a Slytherin. For some unknown reason, they always loved teasing the people from your house, though Hufflepuffs chose not to return their actions.
"Mr. Lee is the only student remaining with no partner."
You gulped and slowly approached him, only because your professors had motioned you over to him. If you could protest, you would, but what was holding you back was the attention given by the entire class and the teacher's who seemed too excited for their own good.
Minho pressed his tongue against his inner cheek, eyes lighting up in wrongly-fueled happiness. He hopped from the upper bench and down across from you. You blinked back at him dryly, maintaining calm yet trying to speak to him with your eyes.
Crossing his arms, he leaned forward and smirked, "Why the bitter face? You should relish in your luck for ending up with me."
"Stop talking, dead cells are coming out of your mouth… Luck my as–"
"Now! That everyone has a partner, I'd like you all to stick with these individuals until these classes are finished," Professor Shin had announced. It was quickly followed by groans and whining from many of your classmates. Though you hated your partner and wished you had arrived earlier and paired with Felix, you stood quiet, isolating the anger within your chest.
"And before we begin once again," Professor Na added, "I'd like to point out that this is still a class. We will be holding a class particularly focused on evaluation and your grade will be heavily based on participation over the length of this course." Once again, a chorus of grumbles had flooded the room.
You hear Minho curse under his breath, only because he was now two steps too far into your bubble, "This is utter bullshit."
This time it was your turn to taunt, "Why? Are you scared or something? Can't dance? Can't keep up with everyone?"
Narrowing his eyes, he scoffs, "Oh, shut your mouth, bumblebee. Just wait and see."
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ii.
"Get up!" Felix tugged at your arm, voice sounding louder than it actually was. When you hadn't shifted at all in your bed, he sighed and tugged once more, "Y/N!"
"Wha– Felix you're not allowed in here!" You kicked at your blanket and sat up.
"We need to get to dance class," he clicked his tongue, "Let's go~"
"I really don't want to go," you whined, "I'd rather fail a class than hold hands with Lee Minho for an hour and a half." Felix dragged you out of your bed to see that you were already dressed in your robe, only your yellow and black tie had been carelessly tied.
"Wait, did you not change out your clothes from yesterday?" Felix jumped back in exaggeration, alarmed and slightly grossed out. His nose scrunched while he judged you through his eyes.
You glared at him and scoff, "Of course I did, you idiot. And don't act like you haven't done that." You take this as your victory as it was true, Felix had gone two days without changing, and it was a bit nasty considering all the places he's gone to in a day.
This time it was his turn to glare at you, "You shut your mouth! Now let's leave before Snape sees us roaming the halls once class starts."
Minho winced slightly, trying not to let your feet ruin the simple waltz routine that the class had finally run through, "If you step on my foot one more time, I'm shoving yours up your arse." His teeth were gritted in frustration, looking down at you with narrowed eyes.
"Then stop stepping on my feet," you muttered back, hoping that no one else, especially the professors, were hearing you two bicker.
It had only been about two lessons into the class and that amount of times that Minho had purposefully disrupted the routine… as if it were good, to begin with.
The two of you found it difficult to fall in sync with each other. It was always either going too fast or too slow, someone making an 'accidental' mistake, and Minho's favourite, holding your hand and hip with a tight and stubborn grip. It wasn't evident whether he was doing it on purpose, either, but you had pointed it out plenty of times, and he never seemed to loosen them.
"I'm not stepping on them," he pushed you back a little too early in the dance, causing you to stumble on your own feet. This caught the attention of those around you, though they carried on almost immediately after.
"Tell that to my bruised toe," you argued back.
As if you were being blessed, the music had finally come to an end. You promptly retracting your arms and to your body and taking a step back from Minho. He had done the same, going an extra mile to turn away from you and to the professors.
"Perfect! Perfect!" Professor Na's face lit up from excitement, "Now that we have learned this simple routine, next class we are moving on to one of the actual dances done in the Yule Ball as tradition. I hope you all are excited as I am!" Very few students had taken time to let out a "whoop" while everyone else, including you, chose to retrieve their books at the seats.
Felix approached you with a pitiful smile. He already knew what you were going to say, patting your back gently, "So how was it?"
Exhausted, you just shook your head and shrugged. Being partners with Minho honestly had been completely draining for you, mentally and physically, which was unusual as you could often live through such situations without feeling the need to scream.
"What else do you think?"
Felix nodded apologetically and puffed out his cheeks, "Is it as bad as the potions exam we had in fourth year?" He shuddered subtly and led you out of the classroom. Just thinking about that exam made Felix want to claw at his brain. If there was a way to take a particular memory and make it disappear from the chamber of long term memories, he would. Maybe then he'd be able to get a few more hours of sleep.
"Yes," you replied simply. The test was equally as horrible for you, but a test didn't force you to 'create chemistry' with a certain Slytherin.
"You're lying… can't be that bad," Felix laughed lightly.
"Easy for you to say," you sighed.
From behind, you feel someone bump your shoulder and pass by you, "Oops," he snickered, walking backwards to watch your reaction. The only thing he was missing was popcorn.
You turned to see Minho and rolled your eyes, "Ha-Ha, you're so funny, Lee Minho." Such a childish joke and you guys were almost leaving Hogwarts.
Though your reply had been dripping in sarcasm, Minho's wit had dodged it entirely, "Well thank you very much," he bowed, more like a manly curtsy, before he ran off, leaving Felix slightly puzzled at what just happened.
"Don't you see how much of a dingbat he is? He constantly chooses to pick on me just to get a reaction out of me," you utter, "He should be glad I was raised to be patient, if not I'd be hexing him like the world was near its end."
"I see a pattern," Felix hummed. The expression on his face looked as if he had come to an incredible epiphany.
Making a face, you click your tongue, "What do you even mean by that?" What pattern? Green, white, green, white? Minho and his constant need to be the crow to your crops?
Felix patted your head, "You're slow sometimes, you know that right?" He puffed his cheeks up and raised his brows as he looked down at you as if you were a kid.
"Can you just spit it out?" you narrowed your eyes at him before you physically pried his hand off your head.
"Minho does all of that just to get a reaction out of you," Felix presses his lips into a thin line, slowly forming a smile.
Finally arriving at the next classroom, you groaned, "You basically repeated what I said earlier…"
"If you didn't know this already, boys love getting attention from someone they are attracted to," Felix plopped into his seat. You followed right after, "I should know… I'm a boy."
You almost laugh at the tone of his voice. The confidence and the look he gave you to emphasize his statement; was all too funny, "So what you're saying is… Lee Minho has a – and god forbid– crush on me?" Felix nods like a young child, with eyes wide and a tight-lipped smile.
"Bollocks," You burst out laughing, "Felix, I love you, don't get me wrong, but you've never said anything more rubbish in the years I've known you."
"The chances are never zero," Felix put his index finger as if he were saying it in 'a matter of fact'.
You lean forward and sit your chin at your folded forearms. You eyed the teacher as she made her way into the room, "You're right there, Lix, but there's honestly no way Minho would like me. And me of all people would know that." You locked that statement in, feeling your words and emotions contradict.
Right?
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iii.
"And then Y/N had the audacity to step on my foot," Minho kicked at the bench across from him, frustration released after what seemed to Seungmin was years of ranting. He didn't mind though, in years of being in the same house as him, he learned how to block him out yet still know what was going on when Minho asked for some sort of reply.
Minho tapped the end of his pencil against his textbook, eyes drifting off elsewhere in the grand hall. Students were clumped at their respective tables, studying for whatever class they had. Minho was trying to do the same, but his state of mind was not in the mood. But he was trying, he was pushing himself, that's what mattered in his opinion.
Turning his attention to Seungmin, who was seated next to him, he jumped, seeing that Seungmin's eyes were wide and directed at him, "What the hell!?"
"What?" Seungmin shifted back forward, facing his own books. In a sense, the scene was hysterical. He acted as if he hadn't done anything wrong or out of the ordinary, but Minho still tried to push an explanation out of him through looks.
"What do you mean what? Why were you looking at me like that?" Minho put his pencil down and closed his book on it.
"I was trying to see something," the boy shrugged and got back to his own work.
Again, Minho furrowed his brows at Seungmin's lack of detail in his response. What in the world was he even trying to do? "Trying to see what? If you don't answer me properly–"
"Okay! Okay!" Seungmin exclaimed a little too loudly, earning looks from other wizards in the room, "You know that saying that if you're in love, you start to glow?"
"No? What type of nonsense are you saying?" Minho scoffed, "Love? Are you sick or something?" Roughly, Minho brought the back of his hand to Seungmin's forehead, which Seungmin had thrown off almost right away.
"You've been talking about Y/N this entire period, you haven't stopped until moments ago," wiggling his eyebrows, Seungmin whispered his reply to Minho, making sure no one would be able to hear him this time.
Minho's face had contorted into one of disgust and confusion, "And?" Where was Seungmin even going with this? He was just relieving stress. It's not that deep.
"My point is that they're the only thing you've been talking about lately," Seungmin scribbles his pen at the top of his paper to get it to work, "Even if I start the conversation, it somehow just shifts to Y/N. Normally I'd be mad, but since you're in love, I'll let it pass."
"In love?" Minho's jaw dropped, a mixture of emotions swimming around inside of him, "In love!?" Trying to find words to perfectly reflect what he was saying, he fails, shoving Seungmin off the bench. Actions spoke louder than words, right?
Seungmin smirked and chuckled, unfazed, "What? Cat got your tongue?" He gets up, dusting his robe off before sitting back down, "It's because I'm right, aren't I?"
Minho gulps, "Will you quit it? You're…"
"I'm…?"
"You're confusing me. Quit it," Minho huffs, gathering all his things as he was planning to return to the dormitories. This was a different way of playing with emotions. There was a zero per cent chance that he liked you, or worse, loved you. That word was way too strong, dangerous like amortentia.
"I take that as a yes!" Seungmin stood his ground, just letting out a genuine laugh.
Minho held a finger up at Seungmin, who still laughed, unbothered. He didn't like you. And if he did, it wasn't wrong to do so. It was an ordinary mortal thing to have feelings. But that didn't matter right now because he didn't like you, not even a tiny crush.
But that slight state of unfamiliar panic in his heart says otherwise.
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iv.
The muscles in your arm were aching from the horrible fact that Minho had been purposefully letting his arm go limp while he was holding your hand, which somehow led to you holding up his arm with your arm. You frowned at him, tempted to let your arm fall in the middle of the routine.
"Can you actually put in some effort?" you whispered through gritted teeth. Squeezing Minnho's hand, you directed a look of annoyance that only returned with an amused look. Underneath his robe, you could tell he had been intentionally dragging his feet, causing the both of you to slowly hold those partnerships behind you up.
"I'm not wasting energy on this," he shrugs quietly, "It's ridiculous."
"What don't you find ridiculous?" you rolled your eyes, "You Slytherins and the lack of interest in anything but yourselves. Where's the excitement in that?" No, you didn't want to generalize the entire Slytherin population, especially since you had family members from that house, but you knew exactly how to rev up Minho's engine. Just by the way his face twisted, you knew damn well you hit the right spot.
"Shut your mouth before I spin you a little too hard…" he said a little bit louder, "I don't find it ridiculous, I just find that us being partners is ridiculous… who in this entire school would want to be partners with you?" Before you could even reply, he had caught you, "That's not from your house."
"Jokes on you, I know plenty of people who would be partners with me," you scoffed, and it was true. There was Jisung who had somehow been sorted into Gryffindor, Hyunjin and their seniors, Bang Chan and Changbin. And there was Jeongin, who was a Ravenclaw. You could list a handful more, but that's beside the point.
"Silence is deadly," he stifled a laugh which had driven you to 'accidentally' stumble over your own feet. This caused him to stumble himself, only he wasn't prepared for it, "I'm blaming you for ending up being my partner. I was hoping someone else would've entered the room. But no, it had to be you."
"You're blaming me? For this?" You shake your head out of disbelief, not noticing that your voice had gone louder. You were catching the attention of those around you and the professors at the front of the room, "You could have found a partner you wanted in the first place but you probably decided to stay back and wait for someone to go up to you. No one wanted to be partners with you, which is why you ended up alone in the first place."
Minho's eyebrows furrowed, eyes almost on fire at what you had just said, "You know what?!"
Before he had been able to continue the banter, Professor Shin had cleared her throat. The glares that they both were sending your way had caused the both of you to stop with the squabbling, "Y/N, Minho, I know we've never talked to the two of you about your constant bickering, but it is simply interrupting the atmosphere of my classroom."
Taken aback, the both of you had stumbled over each other's feet, falling to the ground and causing a domino effect among the rest of the students.
Flustered, you turn to Minho, "That was all your fault, Lee Minho." You huffed and attempted to get up, failing once you noticed that Minho was practically lying on your leg.
"Oh be quiet," he rolled his eyes and dusted himself off, "That was all you! You and your two left feet." The rest of the room was silent, regardless of the incident. All ears and eyes were on the 'love birds,' not entirely sure whether or not they should blame you both on what had just happened.
Sliding out from underneath him, you scoffed, "Don't speak so highly of yourself, Minho."
Minho cackled, "Highly? Of myself?!"
"Stop this instant!" Professor Na had finally mustered up the courage to intervene, anger bubbling in his stomach, "Enough!" The two professors began helping the students up, scolding both of you as they did.
"Five points deducted from your respective houses," Professor Shin said sharply, "And you both are now in charge of polishing the floor every Friday for the following three weeks."
"But professor–"
Minho was cut off, "That, or ten points off for your houses…" And without another word, you both chose to polish the floors after all classes were done for the day.
Day one of polishing the floors was practically the most difficult. Not only did the professors restrict using magic to finish the chore, but the overall idea of doing something alongside Minho aggravated you, which was why you hated dancing with him so much. The comments he'd make, the taunting looks he'd give you, the jokes that were obviously uncalled for, they all were honestly bringing you to the point of near insanity.
At first, both of you had decided to start off on the same side, almost the same corner. But the moment you noticed Minho constantly glancing your way in the corner of your eye, you decided against it, "How about I start at that end."
"Whatever floats your boat," he mumbles, "I don't care."
The tone in his voice hadn't matched yours, which you assumed was polite enough not to spark some type of that energy in him, but it did.
"Whatever," you make your way to the other end, sliding your robe off on the way. You let it hang off one of the benches, making sure it wasn't touching the floor. You rolled up your sleeves and started polishing the further end of the room, a bit relieved that Minho wasn't hovering anywhere within your line of sight. It was better that way.
The second day, you were hoping that you could get through a period of cleaning without hearing Minho's ungodly voice. He had been moving back and forth from one corner to the other, feet squeaking seemingly endlessly against the floor. You wished that the volume of the music could be turned up louder.
"I'm doing more than you are," Minho pointed out. You turned to find that he was standing in the middle of the room, hair messy and beads of sweat lining his hairline. His collar was out of place, and his sleeves were rolled up to his elbows just as yours were. Did he, for some reason, look attractive, or was it the lack of light in the room? Probably the latter.
"What do you mean you're doing more than I am?" you feel your eyebrows knit together in confusion, "I'm doing the same amount of work as you." And you were, but you were working just a bit slower than he was. He had probably sped through his area with the idea that the sooner you both finished, the sooner you were able to leave.
"Just hurry up," he groaned. Minho dragged his feet over to a lone stool, pushing it against the wall before plopping into it. The music continued to play, drowning out the shuffle noises of his feet.
"No," you replied, keeping your speed consistent. It wasn't like you wanted to stay longer. It was the fact that Minho couldn't leave until you were finished that was making you act this way. Maybe if he did his job well, he wouldn't be sitting around doing nothing.
Tile by tile, you continued to carry out the chore given to you, not paying mind to the pair of eyes that were burning holes into your back. You ensured that the areas you had worked on were basically spotless, reflection or not, you assumed that shiny meant clean.
Minho had been humming along to the somewhat catchy tune, foot tapping to pass the precious time he believed you were wasting. Nonetheless, he leaned back and sighed, hoping you could finish in time, so he had time to nap before dinner.
"Why do they even need classes for dancing?" He sighed out. At first, you weren't quite sure if he was speaking to you or if he was just thinking out loud, "I feel like we'd be fine either way…" You turn to look at him, seeing that he was already staring at you down.
"I mean it's going to look nice at the Yule Ball,"
You replied.
"Yeah but not everyone's going… it's a waste of time," Minho had a point, yet you still found it somewhat amusing that the school would want to organize such things.
"I don't see why you don't just skip class if you find it a waste of time," you moved onto another spot and sighed, "No one's stopping you."
"Yeah but who'd be your partner then?"
Not knowing how to react to his question, you keep quiet. Minho decided not to follow up on the problem, thinking that he had said something out of the ordinary.
The sun had reached the horizon when you finished your portion of the room. You stood up to stretch, hearing the joints of your knees and back pop out of exhaustion. It was satisfying to see the difference between the used, scruffy floor and the clean, polished floor.
"Okay Lee Minho I'm finished," without taking a glance at the boy, you made your way over to the record player. You lifted the needle off and picked the record up, slipping it into its sleeve. It didn't occur to you that Minho hadn't shifted in the past thirty minutes, silence filling the room because you turned the music off.
"Minho?" Finally turning to him, you found him sleeping with his head sat back against the wall. His mouth was wide open, practically becoming a makeshift trap for bugs that happened to be flying around. The rest of his body was limp, legs spread out beneath him. It was surprising that he hadn't fallen off yet.
You walked up to his sleeping figure and laughed lightly, wishing you had a camera to capture this moment. It would've been great blackmail. Maybe then he'd start being nice to you. Naturally, your eyes followed the slope of his nose, then to the two front teeth that stuck out from underneath his top lip.
He had bunny-like features, and you didn't mean that in a wrong way. His face was still sculpted nonetheless. Anyone with eyes would have to admit that he was attractive.
"Done staring at me yet?"
You screamed and jumped back, pressing your hand up to your chest as if to calm you down. Looking back at Minho, you find that his eyes were still closed, yet a smirk had replaced his gaping mouth. The number of curse words that threatened to leave your mouth was countless, the embarrassment creeping up to your cheeks. He finally lifted his head to look at you, eyes still a bit droopy from his nap.
"I-I wasn't staring at you," you denied, shaking your head a bit too aggressively, "Well I was… but because I was laughing at how foolish you just looked."
An offended look surfaced Minho's face, scowling at you as he stood, "I have this feeling that you're lying, bumblebee… Anyways, this is where I leave. Finally, after years." He shook his rolled-up sleeves so that the cuffs slid back to his wrists. You let him leave without another word from the two of you, still in a bit of shock at what just happened. You knew he was never going to let you forget that.
You slumped next to Felix as dinner was being served, an expression almost as heavy as your posture. He looked down at you, debating whether or not he should interrupt the mini montage you were probably playing through your head.
"I want to ask you how the cleaning today was but I think I already know just by looking at you," he stated, sliding a piece of roasted chicken your way, "Unless you do want to speak about it. Just eat and the day's over."
You gave him a grateful smile and gestured for him to eat too, eyes lighting up slightly, "I'm actually not tired from cleaning that stupid dance room, but it's just… this thing that happened. It was beyond embarrassing."
Felix snorts and stuffs his cheeks with food. His words came out muffled as he still chose to reply with a full mouth, "What happened this time?"
You glanced towards the Slytherin table, eyes scanning it quickly to get one quick look at Minho before you whispered, "Minho fell asleep waiting for me to finish cleaning. He looked idiotic as he did so I sorta just—how do I say this— stared at him? But it wasn't like I was admiring him, it was more like I didn't want that stupid look on his face to go away. It was amusing."
"And?"
"In the middle of that he went, 'are you done staring yet?' It was like he had a sixth sense or something," you muttered, "Now I feel like he's making fun of me."
"Doesn't he always make fun of you," Felix had yet again stuffed his mouth, so his words were still muffled, "Why does it matter this time?"
"It's different. It's not some useless situation… it was genuinely embarrassing," you poke the food before taking a bite of your own, "He's going to it against me, I already know."
"Don't worry, I'm pretty sure he'll forget it sooner than you will."
"Hey remember when I caught you staring at me?" Minho's voice echoed faintly throughout the room. He stood up to stretch before he crouched back down.
"I never stared at you," you sneered, "And why are you talking about that as if it happened years ago. That was literally last week."
"That's long enough in my book," he retorted, "Good times." A small reminiscing type smile appearing on his lips.
"Can you not start? I sorta want today to be stress-free and you're literally ruining it," you roll your eyes and move onto the next tile on your side. Minho had decided to choose a different record to play today, one the professors had never played in class. It had been hidden behind all the other records being used, and it took Minho a good five minutes to rake through all of them just to get to it.
The songs were more upbeat than the waltz music you were forced to listen to, which was actually much more perfect for cleaning to. It made it a bit more bearable than the last two times you had to clean.
Minho didn't reply, though you didn't see how he switched glances between you and the mechanical polisher in hand. The track had shifted into a faster song, something that was easy to dance to. From where he stood, he could see your knitted eyebrows, eyes dropping from the slight fatigue blanketing over you after a long school day.
Upon awareness that his shoulders were slumped, he straightened himself and sighed. This week had indeed been a long week, and it was evident in some way in both of you. This was the last of the week's labour before he could go and relax while mindlessly saving his homework for Sunday.
The music had been tempting to let go earlier than he should for the week, the steady beat and the catchy melody filling the room.
Putting the polisher and the rag down, he took a few steps towards you, still contemplating whether he should do what he was thinking or not. He was unsure whether it was bizarre for him to pull such a thing. But you did say you wanted a stress-free day, so he thought he should switch up a bit.
He started moving his body to the rhythm of the music, head bobbing as it took over him naturally. It was easier dancing alone than with a partner, that's for sure, but he wanted to invite you.
"Y/N!" He was freestyling, arms flailing and legs bringing him across the room with a swift movement.
You sighed, "What now?" Turning to Minho, you find him in the middle of the dance room, doing what the room was made for. He had a foreign smile on his face, not the usual smirk you'd find him sporting.
"What the–"
"Join me!"
You went through several different emotions in seconds, confusion, amusement, joy, contemplation… how were you supposed to react to a goofy Minho?
"Join me!" He repeated. This time he approached you, hands out in invitation, "C'mon it's fun!"
"Minho, we have to finish this so we can leave, remember?" You tried to keep a stern look on your face, yet you couldn't hold back the smile that had been forcing itself out. Minho suited this look; It was happier and carefree. You didn't know that his eyes would light up when he smiled a somewhat gummy smile.
"I know, but let's take a break," being the impatient boy he was, he took hold of your hands and pulled you up. He led you in a dance that probably wasn't considered a partner dance. He just pushed your arms back and forth like those scenes in the movies.
"Minho!" You finally let out a laugh, feet unable to keep up with his. He was sidestepping left, then sidestepping right, then back and forth, all unplanned. You stumbled, letting out joyful laughter that was rare around Minho. He laughed along with you, eyes disappearing the bigger his smile got.
When your legs had gotten worn out from constant movement, you tripped over one of them, sending you and your dance partner to the ground. Instead of erupting anger that would have usually washed over you, fits of laughter fell in its place, echoing throughout the room.
Before you could ask if he was okay, you hear footsteps enter the room, a confused Professor Shin staring the both of you down, "What are you two doing?! This is not polishing the floors!" The exasperation changed the normal hue of her skin into a shade of crimson.
Quickly apologizing, you get up and return to your so-called 'stations,' not being able to say another word about what had just happened to each other.
You wouldn't admit it out loud, not in front of Minho at least… but that was the most fun you've had in weeks.
Little did you know, Minho felt the same way.
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v.
There was a part of you who had gotten used to Minho's horrible dancing after two weeks of dancing classes. After what happened last week, there was a tiny sliver of toleration that had surfaced from both of you. It was mutual. But obviously, neither of you were going to admit it.
Though Minho was starting to get somewhat bearable, there were still days when he'd begin to act up, smirk pinned tightly on his lips while he mischievously pranced about in the dance room. Today was one of those days.
When Professor had slipped the record onto the play, dropping the needle onto the very edge and starting it, Minho had chosen to let his body go heavy, relying on you to haul him around like a giant, weighted ragdoll. You knew he wasn't tired, just judging by the look in his eyes.
"Give it up," you tugged him roughly in one direction, then again towards another, feet hardly following the steps the class was taught the past few weeks. If Minho let his body grow just a bit limper than it already was, his head would have fallen directly onto your shoulder. If you were being honest, you didn't want any attention from anyone else in the room, "Lee Minho, I'm not in the mood for this today, okay?"
Minho's ears perked at the foreign tone that had slipped from your lips, sensing that you were being serious. You would tell him to quit it most days, but never with that tone; It was no fun if you weren't fighting back. Sighing quietly, he had picked his body up and started to follow the eight-count that Professor Shin was practically yelling out.
This minor change didn't go unnoticed by you, feeling his body grow lighter just moments after you'd ask him to quit it. Did he just…?
Other students in the room were surprised that you two were going more than thirty seconds without arguing like a married couple. Many sets of eyes didn't bother leaving the both of you, watching what would happen next in the twist of events.
Minho's feet carried his body swiftly; for the first time, he was guiding you like he was supposed to, but his eyes were glued to his feet, not wanting it to become weird if he were to make accidental eye contact with you. He didn't like how quiet it was between the both of you. The music didn't even do its purpose by filling the silence.
"Are you going to the Yule Ball?" Minho asked awkwardly. He twirled you as part of the dance. He recognized that look on your face which was basically a wordless reply, "That was probably a dumb question." Shaking his head, Minho mentally slapped himself. Never in his life did he fail with words.
"Of course I'm going," you replied rather expressionless, "Why would I not?" You were almost as confused as earlier. Minho trying to make a civilized conversation. Who the fuck was this? It wasn't Minho.
He shrugs, "I don't know… I guess you have a date…?" Minho, what the fuck. He squeezed his eyes shut as if the stone floor would swallow him wholly to take him away from this situation.
As puzzled as you were, you still decided to keep the conversation as it was, "Nope… I think I'm just going with Felix for fun." You tried to keep your tone calm when really you were freaking out. The only thing was you had no idea why you were freaking out, "Y-you?" Facepalm.
"No one."
None of you chose to speak after, not knowing where the conversation was going. The song was slowly reaching the end, which you had wished came sooner. Minho's hands were growing sweaty, and you wanted nothing more than to wipe your hand off. It was getting hot in the room too. Your collar was growing tight, throat itching for water.
Minho's heart was beating a bit too fast for his liking, but it was probably because he was growing tired from the moving. He wondered if you could feel how sweaty his hands were getting. Embarrassing.
"Final counts!" Professor Na called out before the static of the record player replaced the music. The two of the professors had clapped in adoration, overlooking all the students in the room.
Professor Shin had a broad smile on her face, "Beautiful! Gorgeous! Best one so far!" She twirled in place, "Thank you everyone! The Yule ball is in two weeks so I am very pleased with the effort you all are putting into this class! Remember we still have the final class in which you are graded, which I'm sure you all will ace."
"I couldn't care less," Minho mumbled, only so you could hear.
You turn to him, squinting your eyes and tilting your head to express your slight frustration, "You know I'm your partner right?"
"Oh no~ really?," he stuffed his hands into his pockets, "And?"
"And? I don't want to fail this class, even though I'm forced to dance with you," you stated, "So don't you fucking dare fail us both." That tone in your voice was evident once again, catching Minho off guard. The only reason that it had this effect on him was that he was so used to you choosing to fight back. It was like some sort of reminder that everyone around him was getting old, and soon all those around him were expected to be serious.
Nevertheless, Minho shrugs to annoy you, "Whatever."
Instead of answering, you eyed him once more. Your dancing just a few moments ago says otherwise.
You had practically sighed out the total capacity of your lungs as you hung onto Felix's arms on the way out the door.
"What are you sighing about?" He chuckled.
"You already know," you elbowed him.
Felix rolled his eyes and sang, "I saw you guys dancing earlier~."
You pushed him away gently, shock littering your face and posture, "What the bloody hell are you on about now, Lee?"
"You guys actually look cute together when you aren't babbling and all," he grinned innocently. Your heart had the audacity to skip a beat, startling you just as much as Felix did.
"Cute?" You scoffed, "First you said you think he liked me, now this? Are you his wingman or something? Are you trying to get me to like him?"
Felix skipped in his step, "I don't even talk to Minho, Y/N, don't be ridiculous… wait… did you basically just say you're starting to like him?" He gasped, hand slapping over his mouth, which had fallen in shock.
"No," you say flatly.
"Liar," Felix poked at your rib, "Liar. At least confess that you find him less bad."
"Sure, whatever makes you happy, Felix."
When you had fallen out of Felix's line of sight, you let the corner of your mouths turn up slightly. He said we looked cute, you think, only followed by you flicking yourself in the temple.
-
"I thought you were staying here until it closed?" you frown at Felix, who started gathering his stuff. You both had planned on cramming everything in for a test the next day, but plans didn't go as planned when Felix was eager to go back to the dormitories to sleep until the morning.
"My eyes are going to fall out of their sockets if I don't go and sleep, Y/N," he pats your head as if he were talking to a young child, "You can stay if you want. I know how much you hate studying in the common room." He double-checks his area to ensure he hadn't forgotten any of his belongings before patting your head once more. He grins and turns towards the door of the library, leaving you sitting alone at the table.
"Felix ~" You called out quietly, only for him to wave with his back facing you. You sighed and slumped back in your chair, resting your arms on the handles. Libraries were so much better when you had company.
The words in the textbook were starting to turn into blobs of ink, and for a second, you were thinking about following in Felix's footsteps. After moments of consideration, you shook your head and sat up. You'll stay, even if it was against the will of your fatigue self that had been prompting you to leave. This was all your fault anyway. Procrastination was a cruel thing.
Hunching forward, you let your eyes trace over the words, trying to process the information. You rewrote the info you wished to remember carelessly. Your notes resembled chicken scratch, but at this point, you didn't care because it was simply supplementary to your studying. The sun was close to its horizon, and the library was close to empty. It was somewhat more motivating.
Slowly the information had started to get more interesting. It was easier to run through the key terms and ideas listed in the textbook, and you could feel the exhaustion simply leaving your body. I'll finish this one last chapter and then save the rest for lunch tomorrow.
Your focus on the book had hindered your peripheral vision that the presence of another wizard floating over your shoulder went unnoticed. It was only until they had sat down next to you when you finally noticed.
You jumped in your seat, eyes growing wide. You had luckily suppressed your scream with your hand, which you had, out of defense, swung forward, slapping the person in the chest.
"Ow! What was that for?"
"You don't sneak up on people like that, Minho," you rolled your eyes at the Slytherin, shifting away from him before turning your attention back towards the textbook. He scooches closer with intentions of irritating you, pushing his face towards your book, "What are you doing?"
You push him away and stick one of the thicker books between you both, "What does it look like?"
"Studying?"
"You're smarter than I thought, Lee Minho," sarcasm dripped from your voice as you glared at him. Attempting to continue with the final chapter, you miserably fail when Minho interrupts your concentration by tapping his fingers loudly against the wooden table.
"Don't you have anything better to do?" you say numbly, voice muffled by your robe, "I was literally just sitting here and you decide to do this."
Minho shrugs and uses his arms as a makeshift pillow, "I was bored, saw you, here I am, I'm here to stay."
Your eyebrows furrowed at the fact that Minho decided to 'spend time with you upon seeing you. You had no idea whether to feel flattered or irritated, but you knew you were confused. He could've just gone back to the Slytherin dungeons to sit with his housemates, but he saw you and decided to sit with you.
Staring blankly at the bookshelves across from you, you huffed out the corner of your mouth, blowing a stray strand of hair by your cheek. You did say you wanted company. You just weren't sure if it was Minho's company that you wanted. Glancing down briefly at him, and looked back up to the bookshelves.
"Fine," you say after pondering about the idea.
Minho's ears perked up, raising his brows, "Fine?"
"Just don't be loud."
Minho's head tilts in confusion, though he still complies, sitting next to you patiently. You continued to read through the final chapter, which you had underestimated in length. The chapter was a good half a centimetre in thickness. Though it didn't seem as much at first glance, the pages were practically dipped in ink, words covering it from one corner to the other.
You could feel your eyes grow heavy as you delve deeper into the chapter. Your bed was calling for you, but there was no way you were going to give. Not until this chapter was finished.
The library had been silent except for the occasional click of the pen from the librarian's desk. You had been mentally counting down the number of pages left to skim over, eager to feel that feeling of satisfaction you usually get once you finish a task. It was the same feeling as crossing or checking off a chore on a to-do list.
Minho had settled his eyes on the centre of your book, keeping them steady even as you flipped the pages. He felt the lids of eyes gradually get heavier as each page went by, and by the time you shut the book in delight, he had fallen asleep.
"Again?" You furrowed your eyebrows, remembering the last time he had fallen asleep in your presence. You darted your eyes away from his dormant figure, not making that same mistake twice, "Minho, wake up."
He stirs right away, head rising from his arms. This time he says nothing, pushing himself off of the library's chair before stumbling over his own feet as he makes his way to your side. He looked like a toddler, and it was admittedly adorable.
"Why didn't you just go straight to the dorms if you were tired," you snorted at his dumbassery. Some students still littered the halls even if curfew was nearing. Instead of parting from your side at the library's entrance, Minho stuck by your side.
"I wanted to spend time with you outside of class," he grumbles. He blinks at the long corridor in front of you two, eyes barely staying open from exhaustion.
Feeling your heart skip a beat, you tried to pick out if he was joking or not, but his tone screamed, 'I'm tired.' Any other emotion was hard to comb out, so you sighed and shook your head, pressing your lips into a smile, "Sleep that cheesiness off, Lee Minho."
Minho continued to walk next to you, silent and confused about what you just had said. It wasn't like he was drunk. He was well aware of what he just said. Nonetheless, he subtly walked you to the kitchen corridor, parting ways with you with an uttered 'goodbye.'
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vi.
Sitting against the stone wall, you watched the rest of the class carry out the dance routine, formation changes and all. You ran through it with them, only mentally as your partner was nowhere to be found, and the class was halfway done.
There were barely any classes left before the final graded run through, and Minho really thought it'd be funny to skip? You would have let it pass if you guys weren't the worst duo in the room, but you guys are the worst duo in the room, which made the situation different.
"Professor Na," You asked quietly, "Has Lee Minho been excused from today's class. Is he ill?" You didn't want to jump to conclusions, keeping in mind that people did have their own reasons. Maybe he had caught a cold or was doing a missed exam that was far more important than dancing.
"No word from Minho, Y/N," the professor hummed back.
You frowned and thanked him, turning back to the main dance floor, students moving in sync. Where was he?
Just as you had finished your train of thought, the door had swung open just like it probably did on the first day of class. Minho stumbled in, hair a mess and a rather sheepish smile stamped on his lips.
"I apologize Professors," he bowed deeply, following the perimeter of the room. He bowed again as he reached the two instructors at the front of the room.
Professor Shin stopped her counting, "No need to apologize to us, apologize to your partner." She gestured towards you, already looking back. Minho nodded and approached you, though when he did reach you, he didn't apologize.
"And?"
"And what?" Minho ridiculed.
"Aren't you going to apologize like what the Professor asked?" You tried not to laugh at how Minho had been acting.
Minho let out a cackle, “No? Why should I? Can you stand up so we can start dancing or something?" His hand was itching to reach out for yours, feeling like he should pull you towards him, but he hindered himself from doing so, stuffing his hands into his pockets.
Instead of pushing the apology out of him, you decided against it, not wanting to waste any of your time, "Why are you even late?"
The two of you followed the crowd, joining in at the perfect time. Minho smirked, "Worried about me or something? I know I'm in your head twenty-four seven, but I didn't expect you to be so obvious about it."
Tightening your grip around his hand, you gritted your teeth, "I wasn't worried about you, nitwit."
"Then why are you asking?"
"Because you made me sit, doing nothing for nearly forty-five minutes?" You reply as if you were pointing out the obvious, "So why are you late and coming to class looking like a mountain troll?"
"Wow, ouch," he sighed, "I slept in. Am I going to hell for doing so? Because I can recall you did the same the first day and got us into this mess."
"This is about you, not me," you applied pressure onto his hands, causing him to stumble back slightly, ruining the rhythm he had built up. He furrowed his brows at you and did the same, only you were somehow ready for it.
"Oh please," Minho rolls his eyes, "You've done the same so you shouldn't even be mad at me."
"I'm only frustrated, not mad, there's a difference," you point out, "And I'm frustrated because we have that graded dance next week. If we fail, it's going to be your fault."
"It takes two to tango," he quoted, "And you already know where I stand on that. I don't ca-"
"Shut up, the professors are looking," you warned, flashbacks to the three weeks you had to polish the floors.
Minho laughed slightly, letting air blow out of his nose. He let his eyes drift down at you, keeping them there for a little too long.
"What?"
"Nothing," he shrugged, spinning you along with the other students, "You just looked way too terrified." The next move had the two of you closer than the initial space between you.
"I don't want to be spending an extra three hours with you after classes polishing the floor," you retort sharply. Instead of holding eye contact with him, you stared at the Slytherin crest on his uniform.
"I know you liked spending time with me, don't lie," he rolled his eyes teasingly.
"I'm not lying."
"You staring at me says otherwise."
"Oh hush about that already, I literally told you that I wasn't staring at you," Inwardly cringing, you felt relief once the music had stopped. You stepped back and eyed down the boy in front of you, "Why do keep bringing that up?"
Before Minho could give reasoning, Professor Na had spoken up from across the room, reminding everyone that the next class was the graded class. Though they wouldn't be strict with grading, he still wanted to see the students' effort 'flowing'. After a chorus of groans, class ended, allowing you to avoid Minho and find your way to Felix.
-
Someone tapping your shoulder had woken you up, head jolting up as if you were frightened.
"Oh I'm sorry, I didn't mean to scare you," Chaeryeong gasped sheepishly. She was hovering over you slightly, eyes wide. She was changed into her nightwear.
You sat up, only now realizing you had fallen asleep in the common room, "It's alright. What time is it?" You didn't even remember how you fell asleep, but you sure did have a good sleep.
"It's almost midnight," she replied, "I needed to grab water from the kitchen, then I saw you here and figured it'd be more comfortable for you to go to sleep in your own bed rather than this tiny couch."
You grinned, "Thanks Chae… I'll probably get something from the kitchen as well."
She nods and mumbles out a quick goodnight before disappearing to the girls' dorms. You return her farewell before standing up, eyes drawn to the wrinkles your nap had made on your robe. Attempting to straighten the robe and yourself out, you stumbled towards the Hufflepuff house entrance, exiting promptly.
The fireplace had been lit, a few house elves roaming about and carrying out their own duties. They paid no mind to you, as midnight snacks weren't out of the ordinary for Hufflepuffs.
You asked for what you needed, then was given it with no delay, "Thank you." The house elf nods before turning away with a grunt.
You sit at one of the tables, zoning out as you stared at the blazing fire across from you. School was getting a bit more stressful than it usually has, which was probably the reason why you had fallen asleep without knowing. You remember coming back from a long library visit. Maybe you collapsed on the couch once you did.
You made mental notes on the work still yet to be done before the following week, spontaneously creating a headache. Standing up, you figured it was best for you to go back to sleep. Slipping the dish into the sink, you started making your way back to the dorms.
You rubbed your temples and shook your head as you closed your eyes. It probably hadn't been a good idea to be wandering with your eyes closed as you had immediately bumped into something firm.
"Y/N?"
Looking up, you came face to face with Lee Minho, who was just as shocked as you were. He had been dressed down in a knitted Slytherin sweater and pyjama pants.
"Minho? What in the world?"
He backs up after noticing how close you were to each other, "Could say the same 'bout you."
"My dorms are right there," you point just down the corridor, "While yours is in the dungeon…"
Minho blinks before he tries to move around you, eyes avoiding yours.
"What are you doing here?" you grab his wrist, eager to find out why he was roaming the halls. It wasn't unusual for students to be breaking the rules, especially Minho, who loved living up to the stereotypes of a Slytherin. He smirks at the skinship, which prompts you to let go of him, heat rising up to your cheeks without warning. You're suddenly glad it's dim around the two of you.
"I was… taking a walk," he successfully pushes past you and into the kitchen, a glass of water already there for him. He thanks the house elf, leaving the glass, before turning back to you. By the looks of it, it seems like he's been doing this before, like a routine.
Rolling your eyes, you scoffed, "Taking a walk? You're painfully awful at lying." And the pause in his speaking gave that away. You followed behind him, expecting an honest answer as if you deserved to know.
"Weren't you just leaving?"
"But my question is unanswered," you shrugged.
"I answered you, I was taking a walk," he pushed the answer. Putting the cup down, he turned to you, "I have… sleeping problems."
"You just lied again," you nonchalantly, "Just tell me the truth. No judgment. A Hufflepuff's promise." You weren't usually one to push an answer out of someone, but this situation was different.
"You say no judgment but I already know how you're going to react to the truth," he takes another sip of water.
"So you were lying!" You raised your brows, "I knew it!"
"You don't deserve the truth," he sighs. Finishing the cup of water, he starts to make his way out, not even turning to look back.
"Lee Minho!" You groaned. Maybe it was your fatigue self or the fact this felt like some sort of game, but you weren't holding yourself back, "When I said I wouldn't judge, I won't. My mind's open to whatever you're going to say."
Minho spins around to face you, stumbling backward a few more steps before he halts, "I was practicing the dance steps."
No judgment.
The flat expression on Minho's face indicated that he had no intentions of lying this time. He had his hands hiding behind his back, eyeing you just to see if you would live up to your promise. Instead of his expected reaction, he finds you smiling, something he'd only see when you were around your friends.
"Wipe that smile off of your face, bumblebee," he mutters.
"Didn't you say you didn't care about that class?" you quoted, a smirk slowly replacing your smile, "Why are you practicing the steps?"
Minho licked his lips. He was at a loss of words, nothing but the truth occupying his mind… Why the hell not?
"Because you care."
You blinked back at him, lips parting and meeting several times as you tried to find the right words to say. The silence was deafening. "What?"
"Because you care," Minho repeated. He kept his expression still, eyeing you, trying to figure out how you were taking this in.
How would he further explain it? He didn't know. All he knew was that ever since that specific moment between the both of you the other day, he took it upon himself to better his partner dancing. He didn't want anyone else knowing, not you, and especially not his housemates, which was why he chose to stay up late to do this; it was the real reason why he had shown up late to class.
You weren't sure if it was because it was quiet, but you could easily hear your heartbeat as it quickened. You try to cover up the fact that you wanted to freak out, "I don't know whether I should laugh or–"
"Yeah, whatever, shouldn't have told you in the first place," he mumbles. For some reason, he felt his heart lub-dub in a way that it shouldn't. He frowned and sighed, "Just forget it."
"Wait, Minho," you call quietly. He stopped in his tracks and turned, partially facing the wall and facing you. He stared back at you with a vacant look, waiting for you to say something. If you weren't going to be saying something nice, he didn't want to hear it after exposing himself like that.
"'Because you care?'" you frowned, "You can't just say that and leave." You already made up a possible answer to the countless questions through your mind, but it was still unclear whether or not that was it.
"What else do you want me to say?" Minho stuffs his hands into his pockets.
"I just want you to explain it," you reply quietly.
Minho glanced out the window sitting by you both before sitting down on its pane, "Remember that other day… when I told you I didn't care?" You nod and move closer to where he sat, unsure whether or not you should sit next to him or not, "I don't know… you were really serious back then… I guess I wasn't used to that. So I figured…"
There was a quick moment of silence before he huffs, almost sounding defeated.
"Did you know that I genuinely don't dislike you as much as you think I do?" He says out of the blue, throwing you off. You wanted to tell him to sleep it off again—why did moments like this always happen at night?
"I don't either," you say back, "At first I did… but I matured."
"I only ever argued with you out of amusement. You're the only person outside of Slytherin that could out-talk me and it bothered me for some reason," he laughed as if he recalled a memory.
"Me intimidating a Slytherin? Just wait til the others hear about this," you joke. He glanced towards your direction and saw a clever glint in your eye.
"Don't you dare," he holds back a smile before standing up to face you directly, "Or…"
"Or what?" You challenged, "Imagine how Seungmin would react! Donghyuck and Renjun? What about Yeosang and Wooyoung?" You start listing the other well-known Slytherins off of the top of your head, holding back a laugh as you watch Minho's face crumble into an expression that looks far too close to fear.
Minho recollects himself and shakes some sense into himself, "Or I'll make you go to the Yule Ball with me." He hadn't planned on asking you today, but the timing was perfect. It fit with the situation. If you were to react unfavourably, then he could just joke about it.
His question shut you up. Your eyes widened at him as you processed what he had used as a threat, "What if I want to go to the Yule Ball with you?"
Minho takes a step towards you, a smirk appearing on his lips. His confidence was skyrocketing, and you can tell, "Then I guess it's a date?"
Rolling your eyes, you let a smile grace softly onto your lips, nodding, "It's a date."
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Bonus:
"I told you to wear something with gold," you whined jokingly as you were greeted with Minho, who had completely dodged your request. Instead of the black and gold look you were going for, he decided to wear a black suit that had traces of emerald. As much you wanted to match with your date, you had to admit that he still looked as handsome as ever in the attire. He looked like a prince.
"And look like a Hufflepuff? No thanks," he scoffed teasingly. He pulls out a corsage, one that matches the clothes he wore, tying it gently around your wrist, "You look very beautiful."
"Well, you look very handsome."
Minho laughed as he sticks out his forearm, a brow raised in your direction. Music being played by the live band had been spilling out of the ballroom; the voices of everyone attending gave the ball more life. It was exciting.
"Minho!" Seungmin had called. Felix, who had slipped from your side the moment Minho approached you, was standing by Seungmin, smiling brightly. He had been hyping you up the entire night, telling you that there should be nothing to worry about.
He was right.
"Shall we?" Minho asked. It was cheesy, but it worked.
"We shall."
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Hope you enjoyed it! A like would be appreciated <3
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127-mile · 3 years
Text
Beautiful disaster.
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Pairing: Doyoung x gender neutral reader. 
Genre: College, roommates, “friends” to lovers | Fluff, angst. 
Warnings: Non-explicit mention of alcohol consumption and vomit, mention of a one night stand, strong language. 
Plot: Doyoung decided to live with you after being kicked out by his roommate. In your small, one bed, apartment. 
Prompt: You’re so beautiful, you know that? 
Word count: +3.3k. 
A/N: This is part of the Quarter of life shenanigans collab hosted by @ncteaxhoe​.
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"What the hell are you doing here, Doyoung?"
Doyoung is sitting in the hallway with his back against the wall next to the door to your apartment, but what is the most worrying is the number of suitcases surrounding him. He looks up when he hears your voice, and he smiles as he stands up, dusting his pants off. "I'm moving in with you!" he exclaims and you shake your head as you stick your key in the lock. "I don't think so. Have you seen the size of my apartment? If it's too small for me, it will be too small for the both of us."
"We can make it work, that's okay." he waits for you to open the door, but you do not make a move, you refuse to have him inside with all of his suitcases. You're not even sure to have enough space to store them. "Why, by the way? Weren't you living with Taeyong?" he shrugs his shoulders, thrusting his hands into the pockets of his jacket. "He kicked me out of the apartment this morning." of course he did. Doyoung is insufferable, and you wonder why he didn't do it sooner. "You'll have to contact the dean to find you a dorm room or something."
"Why live in a tiny room when I have a best friend ready to put me in until the end of the school year!" he explains and you let out a long sigh. "I'm not your best friend. We're not even friends." he puts a hand on his heart, a falsely offended look on his face. What an idiot. "Of course we're friends! We got drunk together, and you saw me and laughed at me when I threw up on Johnny's bed, so that makes us friends. Very close friends. And friends are supposed to help each other in case of need."
"I can't do anything for you, sorry." you enter your apartment, and you close the door in front of Doyoung's face and you hear him whine, which makes you roll your eyes. You put your backpack on your bed, which is, moreover, the only bed in the apartment. A bed that doubles as a sofa, a desk, and sometimes even a dining table, but you're not a fan of the latter option, you prefer to eat on the floor. You turn your head when you hear noise in the hallway, and when you think Doyoung has understood and is leaving, you notice that he is singing. Very loudly.
You open the door quickly and you meet his gaze. "What are you doing? I have neighbors, and I don't want to see the police show up!" he smirks, he knows he won the second you open the door wide, and push yourself to let him through. "You're not going to be able to fit all of your suitcases inside, so you're going to have to decide what to keep, and what to throw away." you mumble and he nods like an excited child. What the hell did you just do, you wonder when you see him sit on the floor to open his suitcases. He pulls out clothes, books, cds, notebooks and you really don't have a clue where he intends to store it all.
You sit on your bed, and pull your laptop out of your bag. Doyoung is going to be outside for quite a while, so you might as well take care of your next essay until he's done. And oddly, it doesn't take him that long, because soon he's standing in front of your bed, his brow furrowed. "Where is my bed?" he asks and you point to the ground with your finger. "Right here, and if you're nice, you'll even get a blanket and a pillow."
"What?" he asks in a way that is too dramatic to be taken seriously. "You expected me to give you my bed? It won't happen, and I don't have a sofa, so it's either you sleep on the floor, or find yourself somewhere else to go." he nibbles on his lower lip, and you tilt your head to the side. You would like to be in his head, to know what he is thinking about. "It's okay, you have a big bed, I'm going to sleep with you." oh my god, it couldn't be worse. "And as for my extra things, I'm going to ask Taeil to lend me his car, and I'll take it all to my parents."
"Your parents? Why don't you go to your parents? You'll get your own room, quality meals, and no rent to pay!" well now that you think about it you're not unhappy to not be in his head, because it must be a mess if he prefers to sleep here rather than at his parents. "My older brother had a baby girl, and he and his girlfriend moved back in with my parents so they could take care of her when they are working, I won't be able sleep." of course he has an answer for everything.
"Don't worry, you won't even notice I'm here." you doubt it very much.
And you were right to doubt it, because Doyoung is very hard to miss, or to ignore for that matter.
Okay, he's clean, and he does the dishes after every meal, but he takes up a lot of space. When he is studying, he sprawls out on the bed, and on the floor, which leaves you very little room to do your homework. And worst of all, he takes all the hot water when he is showering. You warned him that the hot water tank was small, and that it would not hold for two people, and yet that did not prevent him from taking twenty-minute showers during which he does nothing other than singing. You've already received several complaints from your neighbor, and it's embarrassing.
He always finds a way to wake up before you and steal your place in the shower, but today you decided it would be different.
When you turn your head, Doyoung is still asleep, and it's a shame that he looks like an angel when he sleeps, because he's clearly the devil himself. His chest rises and falls in the steady rhythm of his breathing, and for a minute, you even wonder if you shouldn't be lying in bed for a little longer, to stare at him. It's strange, but it's pleasant, it's relaxing.
No, you can't let his angelic face make you change your mind, so you straighten up, being careful not to make too big movements that might wake him up, and when you look at your phone which is resting on the bedside table, you notice there are 30 minutes left before Doyoung's alarm goes off. This gives you plenty of time to empty the hot water tank yourself. Perfect.
On your tiptoes, you walk to the bathroom. You undress, and you step into the shower. You almost scream when the spray of cold water hits your body, but it heats up pretty quickly, thank goodness. You've barely been under the hot water for less than five minutes when the glass door opens, and your gaze lands on Doyoung. Doyoung who is very much naked. "What are you fucking doing?" you ask, surprise and he shrugs. "You're not the only one who needs hot water."
"It's no fair! You have hot water every morning, and I have to make do with a cold shower. You can't change the rules, let me enjoy it, please!" he shakes his head, and you feel his chest press against your back so that he too can enjoy the hot water. You roll your eyes because you've come to realize that it's impossible to make him change his mind when he has an idea, and that he's extremely stubborn. Just your luck.
"Could you give me the bottle of shampoo?" he asks and you sigh handing him the bottle that he takes with a weak thank you. You feel him moving against you, and it gets hard to ignore the fact that he's completely naked, but that doesn't seem to bother him, and you wonder if he was doing the same with Taeyong. You'll remember to ask him someday.
When you finish washing, the water starts to cool and you shake your head when you get out of the shower. You grab your towel that you wrap around your body and you hold out Doyoung's. "See, it wasn't that hard! We should do it every morning. Hot water for both of us, and we'll save a lot of money on the bill." no one had ever used the water bill as an excuse to lure you into the shower with them, but that's okay. You laugh softly. "At one condition." you say turning on your heels to look at him. "We shower at 7:30 am. I don't get up at 6:00 am every morning for a shower."
"It's fine by me." he brushes against you to get out of the bathroom, and you see his smirk. If only you could make him swallow his stupid smile, you would do it without a second thought.
"Taeil isn't in town, so he gave me his car. Do you want me to drive you to uni?" he asks when you're about to leave, bag hanging from your right shoulder, and you nod your head. "Yeah, that would be nice." the distance between your apartment and the university is not huge, but it's nice to not have to walk, to not have to pass other students that could use the opportunity to talk to you when you are not up enough to be social.
Doyoung pulls into the university parking lot, and gets out of the car. You follow him closely with a sigh, you really don't want to waste the next three hours in a crowded auditorium, but alas. "Oh, by the way. I'll be staying at the library tonight, so take the keys." you throw the keys over the car, and he grabs them without a hitch. "Are you planning to study late?" you shrug your shoulders, you don't plan that kind of thing. The library is the kind of place where you know when you're going in, but don't know when you're going out. "Maybe, I do not know."
"Message me when you're ready to go, I'll pick you up, I don't want you to walk alone when it's dark." you roll your eyes. "It's not like I've never done it before." you walk to the building, and you can't help but smile, it's really sweet of him. Maybe the devil has a soft spot for you, who knows.
As promised, Doyoung is waiting in the car when you get out of the library. And he didn't come empty-handed, he has hot coffee and a croissant for you. Yes, the devil definitely has a thing for you.
After all, living with Doyoung isn't horrible.
Okay, the apartment is way too small, but it seems that the lack of space is being billed with an obvious rapprochement between the two of you. Doyoung behaves like the devil most of the time, mostly when he's with his friends, but when he's with you, it's like a switch turns on, and he becomes the angel he looks and sounds like. Not only does he clean, but he cooks too, and you have discovered that he is an amazing cook. And the more time goes by, the more you wonder why Taeyong threw him out.
And you decide that this morning is the perfect time to ask him.
Your classes were canceled for a reason you know nothing about, a reason you didn't read when you got the email this morning. You only had to read the word "cancellation" to quit the app and go back to bed, but of course Doyoung decided otherwise. After a shower taken together, you settled on the floor while waiting for Doyoung to finish getting ready for his day. What he does besides in front of you, and it is well in spite of you that your gaze follows the slightest movements of his body. Can we blame you? You are only human after all. And Doyoung is extremely attractive.
"I never asked you, but why did Taeyong throw you out?" he turns to face you, tilting his head, and you regret asking the question because he is shirtless, and you want nothing more than to run your fingers on his chest, and on his toned stomach. "I may have slept with his crush." Oh.
So he is that kind of guy.
"In my defense, I didn't know who they were! I didn't know Taeyong had a crush on someone, if I had known I would never have hit on them at the party we threw for his birthday." you hum, but you're not sure you believe any of it. "So when Taeyong woke up, and saw us in my bed, he told me to get the hell out and to not come back."
"I see." you pick up your phone, mostly to avoid looking at Doyoung, and to avoid thinking about the unpleasant feeling that has settled deep in the pit of your stomach. You don't want to think about it, you don't want to think about what it means. "You should hurry, you're going to be late." if Doyoung notices a change in the intonation of your voice, he doesn't say anything, he finishes getting ready and he leaves the apartment.
The hour after Doyoung left, the apartment became silent again, and it's strange. You're no longer used to having a quiet apartment, not hearing the sound of Doyoung's keyboard keys, or even hearing him sing whenever he gets the chance. But you don't want to see him right now, which makes the situation a little more complicated. So you do the only thing that seems resonable to you to forget everything: you take a nap.
And when you wake up, the first thing you see is Doyoung. He's sitting on the edge of the bed, watching you. "You are so beautiful, do you know that?" you rub your eyes with the palm of your hand and straighten up with your back against the headboard. "Don't say that, Doyoung." you answer in a whisper and he shakes his head. "You do not believe me?"
"Is that what you said to Taeyong's crush to put them in your bed?" you ask and he frowns as he gets up. "What are you talking about?" you sigh, you just woke up, and you have a headache, you don't want to bother with this conversation, but he doesn't seem to want to end it . "You slept with them, you knew who they were, so you probably said something like that."
"Wait, you didn't believe me when I told you that I didn't know about their connection to Taeyong?" you shake your head. After all, why would you believe him? You don't know Doyoung that well, you've never spent time with him outside the apartment or the library. You don't know what he was like when he was living with Taeyong, so he shouldn't blame you for not believing him. "I have no reason to believe you, maybe you're just trying to put me in your bed, who knows."
He bites his lower lip, crossing his arms over his chest. "If I knew I was going to be accused of something I didn't do, I wouldn't have come here." you scoff as you lift your head to meet his gaze. "No one asked you to come here, Doyoung! You came of your own free will, without letting me know, don't act like you've been invited to live with me. You don't get to be offended by this situation."
"I can not believe it." he sighs, and he turns on his heels. Of course, it doesn't make you happy to hear the front door slam behind Doyoung but it's for the best, right? It's best to know who he really is before you fall in love with him even more.
Maybe he wasn't lying, and you'll regret everything later, but it's for everyone's good. It is for the sake of your heart that you must protect at all costs. Right?
Doyoung didn't come home that night, and even though you did this, you pushed this on yourself, you stayed awake until the wee hour of the morning, wondering if he was okay, how he was feeling. You hate yourself, especially when you grab your phone to dial Doyoung's number. Maybe that's what you needed, some time to think about it. You didn't give him the time to explain himself, even though he didn't even have to explain himself, it's his life, not yours.
"Doyoung, please, come home."
When Doyoung comes home, you have barely fallen asleep, but the sound of the door is enough to wake you up. You turn your head when you hear the sound of footsteps and when your eyes meet Doyoung's, you pout. Doyoung looks exhausted, and you wonder where he spent the night, but like every time he picks you up from the library when it's dark, he's not empty handed. He holds a bouquet of flowers which he hands you. "I am sorry."
You shake your head as you get up, putting the flowers on the bed to put your hands on his cheeks. He leans into the touch, and you almost feel like cooing. "You don't have to be sorry, I should be. I accused you, and I didn't give you time to defend yourself. Hell, I shouldn't even had blamed you in the first place when I wasn't around to see what really happened." you speak quickly, and Doyoung chuckles.
"Breathe, everything is fine." he says in a soft voice, and you want to melt in his embrace. "You forgive me?" you ask in a small voice and he shrugs his shoulders. "It depends. Do you agree to go on a date with me?" you roll your eyes, why aren't you even surprised? "I could tell you yes, if you promise not to sleep with my crush, but it would be pretty hard since it's you. So yes, I would love it."
You've seen Doyoung smile before, but his smile has never been brighter, and his eyes, you don't have enough words to describe the emotions you can read inside them. "Can I kiss you?" it's your turn to shrug, ignoring the butterflies in your stomach. "I guess." he leans over and kisses you softly. It's nothing but a chaste kiss, but it's enough for you.
It's not what you would have thought was going to happen when he left the apartment last night, or even when he decided to move in, but you're definitely not mad about it.
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mirclealignr · 2 years
Note
I'm in a depressive state and it's only getting worse by the hour
I have a 12-15 page exam paper due to the 30th of September and haven't started yet. During the consultation with my professor we came to the conclusion that the text I want to work on is extremely difficult to do so bc there's literally no academic research on it and just some ratings and book critics on the author himself I need to have the paper done by the end of next week bc after that I'm going into a 3 week internship at a school for 2 other exams (portfolios for teacher stuff) and I don't know where to start and how and I'm just so overwhelmed by everything bc I'm already in my 7th semester and if I don't pass these exams I'll lose my financial support from the government and if I have to take on a job then I won't finish studying by the time I want to BC I'd have to postpone so many seminars and lectures BC I need to study 3 subjects to become a teacher and I'm on the verge of just quitting everything but I'm a working class child and I don't want all those years I already spent at uni to go to waste just because I'm such a lazy procrastinating person
Please if you or your followers have any advice on what to do I'm begging
okay first, you probably need to take a break and get yourself a glass of water and just take a step back. Because the more you try and do this and stress yourself out, the worse it’s gonna be. You have come so far and overcome so many essays exams and difficult deadlines—you can do this too. You absolutely have the ability to smash this essay and do everything else that you need to do. I believe in you.
but that sounds like a really difficult situation. Is the text that you’re doing the only text you can do your exam on or is there another one you can do without losing a significant amount of time? If that is the only one you can do, you might have to just go with the reviews on the author himself because that might have things like whether he’s an accurate writer, whether his views are adopted by a large audience or whether he’s quite controversial. It might not though, i don’t know. Your opinion counts too, though. But I mean it is a really difficult thing to write a paper without any reviews on what you’re writing.
are there any services that your university or library offers that help you with essay writing? Because I booked a slot last year when my exams were coming up to talk to a woman about where I was going wrong with my essays and what I could do to improve and she also looked at one of my essays that I had already written to critique. I was doing well but I wasn’t getting 100% on things so I knew there were places I could improve. it was only an hour or so but it did help and my marks did go up and they did offer advice on what I could do.
I know this sounds obvious and it does sound like you’ve already done this, but speak to your lecturer & your academic advisor. I don’t know what you call that in your school but we call it an academic advisor. you could also speak to the head of the course to get some advice. 
and when I don’t know how to start an essay, I literally just start. And I don’t mean that to sound ridiculous, but I just write something down no matter how bad it is, no matter how bad the english is, and no matter how stupid the answer is. but as long as I have a baseline and something to build on, I can go back and edit and improve and better the arguments. Plus when i’m writing this i usually get into the groove and things start coming to me. Maybe write down everything you know about the topic and could include, write what you know about the author and definitely read those reviews even if they are just about the author, they might have something useful in there.
When it comes to procrastinating, I have been there, I am there. I am one of the worst at procrastinating. Something that has really helped me, is scheduling my day from the tiny little things to the really big things. I even put in to take my pills, to read for 10 minutes a day, to make my bed, all the way to start my essay, apply for jobs, do my interview. everything, I put everything in there. i’ve even put in when my flights are, when my university lectures are and from what time to what time. I know that it’s all online, but it’s easier to see it in my planner with everything else that I have to do that day. 
wishing you the best and sending you luck !
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Text
FACE - Woosung/Sammy Kim - Drabble
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Kim Woosung/Sammy Kim x Reader
Genre: Fluff, Friends to Lovers
Word count: 2,5k
Summary:��After a long semester of uni finally comes to an end, y/n and her friends are able to go out again and have fun. A fun night out turns into something very beautiful.
(Also I would like to apologize for any errors, english is not my first langugae so please have mercy on me ^^’)
~Hope you like it!
„Finally!!! We are done with all those stupid exams!!!” your friend Coco shouted once you got back to your apartment from Uni after having your last exam for this semester today.
“Hey, you do know that we have neighbors, right?” you giggled, hitting her in a playful way.
“Yeah, yeah, but aren’t you glad that we finally can relax?? We should celebrate it!”
“Of course I am glad, silly. So how do you want to celebrate surviving another semester?”
“Hmm, I’m not sure yet but I want to do it tonight! Otherwise it’s not as much of an celebration.”
“Sounds a lot like you want to go drinking, huh?”
She smiled at you sheepishly, “Maybe…”
“Okay so a girls night out it is?”
“Eeeeh…” she started hesitatingly, blushing a little
“what do you mean ‘eeeh’?”
“How about…”
“Wait! You want to ask the cute guy from our history class out, don’t you??” you said wiggling your eyebrows at her
“Heyy!” she punched your arm, “what I was going to say was: we could gather a few of our friends… and maaaaybe also hajoon…” she got quieter during the end mumbling the last word.
You grinned. “Well you can invite some people I guess, still don’t have a lot of friends that aren’t also yours here” you smiled a little embarrassed at yourself hearing that coming out of your mouth after being here for already one and a half year.
“Oh just not too many please… I’d like to still keep the circle small tonight.” you added
“Sure thing she said, sitting down on the couch and already looking through her phone for the right people”
Some time passed and you used it well by taking a nap, seemed like the best idea since you’re probably gonna be out the whole night. However, your peaceful slumber was rudely interrupted by Coco barging in your room exclaiming that she finally had the perfect selection of people.
You mumbled a half awake “Shoot” and nuzzled your head back into your pillow.
“Okay so, since we want a rather small group this time, I made sure that I selected them very carefully!” She listed a few of your friend group to which you just nodded to, still half asleep.
“And-I-also-might-have-asked-Hajoon-if-he-was-free-and-he-is-joining-us!!” She quickly spat out hiding her face in her hands squealing like a little kid.
You grinned at her, “glad you finally had the guts to ask him out!”
“That’s not all thought, I thought that since I would be a little occupied with hajoon tonight I though I would invite someone for you too! BUT- Please don’t hit me now okay!”
You slowly opened your eyes looking at her kinda pissed already. “And who would that someone be?”
“Sammy…” she mumbled
“HUH?!?!” now it was really over with your beauty sleep, you shot up in your bed looking at her in disbelief. “Sammy?, you… mean Sammy Kim?? Your freind from highschool, who I had nothing but awkward interaction with since I met him last year?” 
“Awkward Interactions?” she giggled, “ if that’s what you call love at first sight but no clue how to handle it, yeah sure you guys had some AwKwArD InTeRaCtIoNs. And now don’t act like I didn’t realize how you two were looking at each other that night, plus how often you too hung out to sTuDy.”
“No No No, he really helped me out with my photography project back then, and you promised me that we would never speak of that night again!” Just as you finished your sentence Coco’s phone made a ding. She opened it and grinned once again.
“Oh come on you both have the hots for each other but your are both to scared to admit it and I like the effect you have on each other, you both are like creative chargers for one another. I’ve yet to see you procrastinate when he is around and you have heard his music improving yourself, do you think that comes just out of nowhere? Huh? Whatever he just texted that he is coming tonight so this discussion is over!”
You looked at her with wide eyes and your heart skipping a beat. You definitely have a crush on Sammy and yeah maybe that happened the first time you met him BUT you were just never really the relationship type of girl, plus you didn’t plan on staying in Korea after Uni so you didn’t want to get to attached to something/someone plus you liked things the way they were up until said night. New Years Eve Party to be exact. You and Coco had a party at the Apartment and most of your friends were wasted at 1am already and Sammy and You also had quite a bit to drink, one thing led to another and you only remember waking up next to him in your bed, all cuddled up together with and hunch of what could have happened. Luckily you two were up before everyone else thinking nobody noticed but of course Coco knew the second she looked at you once she woke up. Sammy had to leave quickly that day because of some issues with brother, who wanted to visit him on New Year’s. Ever since than you two tried to keep it casual by not addressing it at all and kind of ignoring each other and your feelings for one another a bit. Until now apparently.
You sighed falling back into your cozy bed once Coco left your room.
~Time skip~
You pushed the thoughts of the night ahead to the side -mostly for Coco since she was worried that you were actually mad at her.
To proof her wrong you put on a smile and you two started to get ready together while blasting music and starting to pre drink a bit. It felt so good though to finally have the time to go out with some friends again after all that studying and stress with exams, just getting ready with your roommate was already so much fun.
Soon your uber came and you were on your way to the club where Coco told the others to meet you. You saw Sammy already when from the car, and your heart stopped a beat. He was just leaning against the wall, headphones in and on his phone. You took a second to admire him before the car came to a spot where you guys could get out. Coco saw him as well form where you two were and tried to scare him since he wasn’t aware of his surroundings, but she failed.
You greeted Sammy with a warm hug, thinking that he would probably feel your fast heartbeat but you always hugged him to say hello and you didn’t want to make things more weird. To your surprise you could feel his heartbeat as well, which weirdly calmed you down a bit.
You too still kept a bit of a distance for now just making things seem “casual”, clearly aware of the tension between the two of you. You got a table at your favorite club and soon drinks started to flow. Your group had an awesome time dancing, drinking, catching up and just enjoying your freedom for now
The DJ was great and constantly playing what you wanted, a couple hours went by and your friend group started to get smaller, one after the other leaving with someone they flirted with for about half an hour. Oh and Coco was all tangled up with Hajoon just as you both expected. You didn’t care about all of that too much just enjoying yourself on the dance floor and chatting a bit with Sammy while still continuously ordering drinks.
Of course some dudes tried to hit on you especially while you were dancing, overflowing with confidence but you just told them to get lost, you were really not interested in any of them. You were really just here to have fun but as you caught a glimpse of the way Sammy was watching your every move you smiled a bit to yourself.
You both were a bit buzzed by now, it being around 1:30am and most of your friends, well actually all of them already gone. The club was still buzzing and you were in no way ready to leave yet, neither was Sammy. It may seem a bit boring to just stand at a table watching a girl dance for hours, only taking breaks to pee or take another shot, not for him tho. Watching your body float over that dancefloor, never missing a single beat, smiling with closed eyes. And every time you were sick of a song you made your way over to him smiling with sparkling eyes in which he could get lost in forever. Every time you would come over you two had a shot or two and every time you went back on the dancefloor you tried to convince him to come with you. He came with once or twice, wanting to stay there with you the whole night just being weightless together but he knew that if he kept dancing with you and already being a bit drunk, he would want more and he wasn’t sure if you were okay with that so he stayed at the table.
At around 3am your feet started to hurt from all the dancing in your heels and you were feeling pretty dizzy, still not wanting to stop dirinking. Sammy knew by the way you came back to him that you were ready to leave and get some food somewhere.
“Sammy…! Wanna grab a bite somewhere?!” you shouted in his ear hoping he would understand with all the loud music and people talking.
To be completely honest he didn’t understand anything over the loud music and his own spinning head but he knew what you wanted so he just nodded and you two left. Once you stepped out of the club you both took a deep breath an looked at each other for a second. In this moment the only thing you wanted to do was kiss him, get lost in his touch and never wake up from it again but instead you just smiled at him and repeatedly said that you were hungry.
Sammy was in the same position, he knew that soon he would not be able to contain himself if you keep looking at him with those intense eyes of yours. He laughed at you being a whiny baby and took your hand to lead you to your guys’ favorite 4am drunk-food place. You both knew that he initially just wanted to yank you a bit in the direction you had to go yet you kept walking hands interlocked up until you got to the food place. It just felt so natural that none of you wanted to let go, so you kept it that way for a few moments longer.
You two kept chatting a bit while enjoying your food. For the few other people in the restaurant you two just looked like a regular couple acting all cute together, feeding each other and giggling while still ordering a few drinks. The owner of the restaurant actually thought you two were so cute that she gave you another soju-bottle for free, “For the lovebirds” she said as she put a the bottle down and winked at you.
You looked at each other with big eyes and you started to giggle since you were still pretty drunk. You took the soju with you and left the restaurant after paying. You were not ready to leave one another yet but you remember that Sammy had that great view from his apartment rooftop so you went there, on the way your hands found each other again and you just walked in silence, enjoying each other’s company.
You set up everything and settled down on the roof with your soju and a blanket just starring into nothing. Soon the two of you were cuddled up listening to each other’s breath.
You sighed “I missed this, you know?”
“Missed what?” he tried playing dumb
“This.. you… us..” you mumbled into his chest trying to hide your blushing
“Me too” he said while running his hands through your hair.
You lifted your head to look at him in the dim light just taking in his features bit by bit. He just smiled at you, slowly closing his eyes, like a cat would do. Carefully you sat up a bit and firmly pressed your lips on his. He smiled into the kiss. It was a very sweet delicate kiss, maybe even innocent, savoring every little moment of a innocent yet so powerful love. You two dragged the kiss as long as your lungs would allow it, after that you quickly nuzzled your head into his warm chest again.
“We should head inside it’s really getting cold and I don’t want you to get sick…” he softly whispered
You nodded and you packed your things to move into the apartment. It was so much warmer and just as cozy as you remembered it. You let out a yawn, stretching your body, Sammy saw his chance and wrapped his arms around you from behind burring his head in your neck. “Tired?” he asked softly.
“yeah… a bit…”
“then let’s go to bed then, shall we?” he asked while already heading towards the bedroom. He gave you his favorite shirt and shorts to sleep in, knowing you would have asked for them sooner or later, also he loved the way they looked on you. You excused yourself to the bathroom to change.
Once you locked the door behind you, you started to freak out silently a bit but on the other hand, everything just felt so right, Your bodies and minds just fit perfectly together and you were kind of mad at yourself for wanting to cut this awesome connection after it got a bit more serious. You washed you face, changed into the clothes he gave you and took a deep breath before heading back to the bedroom.
Sammy was already all cuddled up and his room looked even more comfortable with the delicate fairy-lights you gifted him last Christmas. You crawled next to him getting comfortable. He gave you another soft kiss, but you wanted more. You started to intensify it to which he gave in, you were hungry for him the whole night already so you were more than eager letting your hand slowly travel over his body an to the hem of his boxers but suddenly he grabbed your hand. A bit perplex you broke the kiss and looked at him confused.
“did... did I do something wrong?” you asked quietly “Do you not want to?”
“you didn’t do anything wrong y/n…” he gave you a peck “It’s just, the last time we did it too quickly and lost each other for a few months… And I don’t want to lose you… this... us again... is… is it okay if we just fall asleep in each other’s arms for now?”
You started to tear up a bit at his words, this was the first time he actually told you how he really felt -probably a bit because of the alcohol too but you didn’t mind that- and it made you realize how you felt as well, so you nodded stealing one last kiss before cuddling up with him and slowly drifting of to sleep while listening to his heartbeat.
~To be continued~
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janekfan · 3 years
Text
Duress
https://archiveofourown.org/works/30665933
As ever, Jon’s timing was impeccable.
Impeccably awful.
Barely a month into his new “promotion” and already he could feel a toll. If he was completely honest with himself he hadn’t expected quite this level of work despite not being a stranger to long hours. To put it bluntly, the archives were a mess. Gertrude hadn’t left any clues as to how filing was done and it all seemed so haphazard he had to wonder if it wasn’t on purpose. He was up to his elbows in files he’d found in a water stained cardboard box when Tim sauntered up, looking down his nose at the papers in disgust. Jon wished he would help and didn’t know how to ask for it with their relationship as strained as it currently was. Tim had silently allied with Sasha when Elias made the announcement and they were all navigating the current situation gingerly. Jon didn’t blame him. She needed support. The statements and recordings and organization could wait until they were ready.
“Hey there, boss. Was wondering if you wanted to come out with us tonight.”
Oh, of course. It was Friday, wasn’t it.
Jon looked around his office, strewn with papers and post-its and worse off than it was this morning. Guilt welled up in him like blood from a wound. Tim was losing his already limited patience with him.
“Uh, yes, that would be nice. It has been a while.” He leaned back and wiped his dusty hands off on his trousers adding to the light streaks already there.
“Yeah, I’ll say. Too important to hang out with us now, ey Jon? Now that you’re a corporate bigwig?”
“I am not!” Tim held his hands up in supplication.
“Just kidding, yeah?” It didn’t sound like it was just anything; certainly not the jokes Tim used to tell. This just felt cruel, probably because Tim thought it was the truth. Jon could admit he was prickly and difficult and knew he never won over many. If he lost Tim and Sasha over this he didn’t know what he would do. “Usual place.”
That exchange happened hours ago and Jon didn’t feel well. He couldn’t go out like this, pulse pounding, head throbbing, vision swimming. He’d have to cancel. But he’d canceled at the last minute on them so many times before and he could tell their patience was wearing thin. How was he supposed to choose between his new job and his old friends? Why couldn’t he just be normal for once?
Why did Tim choose now to forget this sometimes happened?
Any moment they’d be by to collect him and Jon was so dizzy he wasn’t altogether sure if he could stand. He hadn’t felt like this since Uni when he and Georgie spent many a late night studying for exams. He’d crashed shortly after, struck down with some illness or another, and barely remembered more than a glimpse of her face staring down at him with concern. Surely they would understand?
“Ready, boss?” Casual with his jacket over one shoulder, Tim leaned into the office, scowling when he laid eyes on him, exasperated. “Really, Jon?”
“I’m sorry, I don’t know what’s wrong with me.” Tim scoffed. “S’sorry. I know it’s rude, I’m just. Tired.” That was a part of it anyway.
“You know, Jon, you say you still want to be friends and then never hang out with us.”
“I know, I’m--”
“You’ve cancelled so many times at this point I don’t know if it’s even worth inviting you.” Jon’s heart nearly stopped, a painful lurch that all but choked him.
“...Please.” Bare more than a whisper, Tim raised an eyebrow in question.
“What?”
“P’please keep inviting me.” If Jon wasn’t so sure he’d pass out upon standing he’d be springing to his feet. “I, I, I’m there. Next Friday, bells on, I swear.”
“And tonight?” Cold sweat slipped down his spine. But if he rested this weekend, took it easy next week, maybe asked them for a bit more help-- “Sure, boss.”
The weekend came and went and Jon tried every trick in the small volume of self-care tips he actually paid attention to. He wanted to show them what they meant to him, even Martin, new and bungling as he was. If they were to be a team, he needed to get to know him. And besides, Sash and Tim enjoyed his company. Had been inviting him out the whole while. Unfortunately, Jon was still exhausted from not sleeping well for bad dreams and restlessness, not eating enough because anxiety turned his stomach. But he’d made a promise and he vowed to make good on it.
Monday saw a fresh pile of work stacked neatly in the center of his desk blotter, old assignments shoved off to the side and a note in Elias’ neat scrawl informing him that this was the priority. Jon spent the next hour putting together the things he’d been in the process of collating and jotting down a list of instructions that even Martin could follow before dragging it out to where his assistants were working.
“Hullo, Jon.” Bright and cheery, Martin chirped a greeting and Jon forced a small smile.
“Morning.” Tim and Sasha nodded back, expectant looks on their faces. “I, um. Well, Elias brought in some more documents for me to take a look at.”
“Promotion came with some extra obligations, did it?” Tim laughed, elbowing Sasha good naturedly.
“Yes, I suppose it, it did.” Jon shifted nervously, anticipating the answer even before he’d asked. “I was hoping you would be able to help me with these ones?” He lifted the stack and Tim made a show of whistling.
“Wow, I mean. I would, boss, but I’m in the middle of this other thing you gave me last week.”
“Oh. I was. Well I was rather hoping you’d have wrapped that up by now.” The room began to tunnel and Jon staggered just a step even though he was standing still. He hadn’t been able to use his cane and handle this veritable mountain.
“You and me both.”
“Jon?” Martin’s worry was more embarrassing than anything else and he forced himself to focus despite the trembling in his hands. “I can take some of them.” But the messy heap on the corner of his desk in danger of toppling hardly seemed smaller than it had the week before. It wouldn’t do to add even more to what the other man couldn’t seem to handle but...
“Th’thank you for the offer.” He selected a few slim folders and handed them off and somehow the work in his arms became heavier.
“No problem!” Martin was beaming so he must have done something right and it sparked a bit of warmth in him. “I’ll make an exchange for another, soon as I finish this up.”
Tuesday went much the same, though Jon’s insomnia and sore joints forced him out of bed and he decided to use the gift of time to come in early to get a bigger start on the old mess so he had more time for the new mess and while Martin was slow it helped to have someone else tackling it with him. He suspected that Tim and Sasha were making a statement in their being shiftless and Jon couldn’t find it in himself to address it instead hoping that once he proved himself they could move past it. Using the stairs proved foolish as Jon nearly took a header from vertigo and he thanked the stars he was early and alone so he could sit down and wait for the episode to pass. Lord, he hurt. Joints on fire, white-hot fire pokers of pressure needling his hips. He hung his head when tears of frustration began to fall.
Wednesday found Jon buried alive and struggling. He had to stay late in order to finish out the day and by the time he made it home he could barely stand, falling into bed and waking the next morning still dressed in his wingtips and work clothes. Marginally better for the rest, Jon used the boon to plow through the rest of Elias’ assignment, skipping lunch he knew he wouldn’t eat anyway to finish.
“Oh, Tim!” He called out his door as he passed, relieved that he wasn’t ignored. “When you have a moment could you take these up to Rosie?”
“Sure thing, boss.”
Jon pushed away the disappointment when the end of day came, his assistants left, and the box still sat on the corner of his desk.
No bother, Tim probably forgot and Jon searched the stacks for the department’s hand truck with its one sticky wheel and found it loaded up with more of Gertrude’s chaos. He didn’t have much choice than to shove at it unceremoniously until it toppled over, papers fluttering out of their folders and under shelves. He’d just have to deal with it later. What’s one more thing? When he tugged, his shoulder very nearly came loose and his yelp of pain was swallowed up in the dark and the dust. Noone around to hear him anyway.
More tears.
He was a mess.
He went along more carefully, cursing the squeak of the blasted wheel, cursing Tim for his forgetfulness, cursing Elias for letting him even steal the job from Sasha to begin with. Cursing time itself because he wanted to go home and it was already an hour past.
“Rosie, I’m so glad I caught you.” She was just starting to collect her bag. “Can I leave this for Elias to collect when he gets in?”
“Of course, Jon!” She helped him lift it to her desk and disguised his taking a rest with interest in her writing a note of explanation.
“Thank you, you really are a lifesaver.” Jon chuffed a weak and humourless laugh. “I don’t know what I would have done.”
“Of course, dear. Just take that along with you so I don’t have to hear about it from the night staff.” The dolly. Yes. It would have to go back down with him wouldn’t it?
Thursday Jon could barely lift his arms. The debacle from the day before had taken whatever they had left and he was scared that at any moment, his arm would drop from its socket. That happened sometimes. So far, no doctor had figured out why.
“Ready for tomorrow?” Tim jolted him out of staring at his pen cup and the surprise set his heart to racing. Jon didn’t know how many minutes he’d lost.
“Ah, uh.” Absently, he rubbed at his chest, willing the battering tempo to slow before it shook him apart.
“Boss.” It sounded too much like a warning and felt too much like his last chance to prove he had what it took to be their friend.
“I’m not backing out!” Quick to cover up his fumble. “Don’t forget to collect me.”
“Never!” Jon couldn’t help but hope he did.
It was a short walk to their usual pub and Jon pushed himself to keep up, breaking out in cold sweat as the nausea from his laboring heart rocked his stomach. He couldn’t wait to sit down. They were regulars enough that the first round appeared before them as if by magic. Jon sank into the conversation around him, sipping from his pint, wishing it was water, and interjecting when he felt up to it. Martin kept staring at him. Jon didn’t have the energy to pretend.
“Oh come on, boss! Our company can’t be that boring!” Tim was three drinks in and clapped Jon hard enough on the shoulder to rattle his bones. Jon bit his tongue so hard he tasted iron.
“Ah, no, just a long week.” His voice was papery as a wasp nest, thin and drawn. “Looking forward to a lie in.”
“Aren’t we all?” Tim drained his glass and Jon looked down at the worn scratched surface of the table to hide his irrational irritability with the statement. He didn’t corner the market on sleeping in. The others deserved a restful weekend just as much as he did.
“I’m surprised you managed to make it through Elias’ busy work.” Sasha murmured, selecting a chip and using it as a means for sauce delivery.
“Martin helped a great deal.”
“That’s kind of you to say, Jon, but we know who worked his way through the majority.” They exchanged a warm smile.
“Yes, well. Any you did, I didn’t have to. It was very much appreciated.” Martin was bright red and Jon’s cheeks were warm, from alcohol or otherwise, and Tim’s cawing laughter rang bright as a bell over the cacophony around them.
“You’ve broken him, Jon!” They caroused well into the evening until Martin mercifully faked a yawn and explained he had an early morning. Jon almost hugged him and if it weren’t for the state of his shoddy joints he may well have. Holding up a very drunk and very affectionate Tim, Sasha nodded to him.
“This was lovely.” Her grin beamed. “We’ll have to do this again.”
Jon dreaded it.
That month they dragged Jon out to the shops for lunch a few times each week. Catching dinner after work became a regular occurance. Sasha hosted a movie night one weekend. Friday nights at the pub continued.
Jon wasn’t sure which was worse; the exhaustion or the steadily increasing pain, but it felt worth it when the frosty attitude began to thaw. They were still friends. That’s what counted even though the littlest tasks had become huge when faced with choosing which ones to do at the cost of himself. He knew better and still he was overspending, going into the red just to collect more and more debt with no way to catch up other than lose his friends. Something was going to break. Jon hoped it wouldn’t be him.
Groggy, slow, Jon came to with his cheek mashed into the statement he’d been skimming. Something was...wrong. His heart. Racing, pounding against his breastbone, trying to hammer its way to freedom or jump straight out his throat. He blinked hard, trying to bring anything into focus and failing. The first attempt to stand had him face down on the desk again, the next he took in steps.
Sit up. Let the room stop moving.
Breathe. In. Out. Count them.
Ignore the agonized beating. Ignore the fear that came with it.
Stand. Slow. Wait. Patient.
Let the world fall still.
Jon didn’t bother picking up his bag. His phone, wallet, keys, all in his trouser pockets.
“Sorry all. I. I think.” He paused, gulping for air, swallowing none. “Need to go, go home.” If what made it out of him were even close to words he’d consider himself lucky. His tongue was thick and clumsy in his mouth, tripping up the syllables fighting their way past the rabbit-quick hammering,
hammering,
hammering.
“What’s wrong?” Sasha was at his elbow, Tim halfway out of his seat.
“Not feeling well.”
“You sure you can get home, boss?” Nodding absently Jon made his way carefully to the lift before Martin could offer to call him a cab or something equally ridiculous.
Muscle memory got him back to his flat and it wasn’t until he collapsed into bed that he remembered it was Friday and he’d again ducked out on drinks again. Tears collected on his lashes, slipping down his temples when his trembling got the better of them. They. This. All his hard work and he’d undone it. Before the encroaching black overtook him he fumbled with his phone, tapping out an apology to the group chat and barely managing to hit send.
He slipped in and out. Lucid one moment, hallucinating the next, burning away to nothing and ending up on the floor more than once after passing out attempting to, to…didn’t matter. There wasn’t enough in him to attempt it again, opting to lay flat on his back in the sweat soaked sheets trying not to move for the pain. For a wild, hysterical moment Jon was sure he would die here, alone, phone just out of reach, melting in wretched heat and so uncomfortably hot it was difficult to remember a time when he wasn’t.
Jon hurt.
Everything was darkness and agony. Each tremor an earthquake threatening to tear him apart. He was trapped in treacle, done up in bits of twine, strung together with razor wire and unable to move. It was a familiar voice that clawed its way down to him. Lifted him up, low and soft, a stone tumbling down a mountain and catching Jon up in the landslide. He thought he answered, made some attempt at a response, drawn out of him like water from a well. Hurting and disoriented Jon drifted. Consciousness slipping in and out through his fingers like the surf, breath like coals banked beneath his ribs. Jon’s body wouldn’t cooperate as it should and time seemed to skip from one moment to the next between long bouts of nothing.
A heavy palm, cool and comforting, came to rest over his forehead and Tim materialized out of nowhere, startling Jon enough that he keened when each joint shrieked and protested at his moving.
“Sh, sh, shh.” Tim. That’s right...he wasn’t sure it was true, but he was wiping down his over sensitive skin with a damp flannel to quell the coals for a handful of moments.
“Wha’s..?”
“When you didn’t come in yesterday or this morning, we figured we should check on you.” So many words. Too many to parse more than a few but the flood came anyway, streaking into his greasy hair because he’d been sure no one would come and Tim kept applying the cold compress; wrung, applied, repeated, and Jon sobbed with the simple relief of it, tears cool against the incandescence of his skin.
“Are you...l’leaving?” He winced at the raw scrape of his voice against his vocal cords. “Been. You’been s’so angry with m’me.” Tim’s face fell and Jon wanted to apologize. It was the illness, that’s all, lowering his defenses and simmering his many insecurities just below a fractured awareness that refused to keep them in where they belonged. Instead his breath hitched and he choked on a whimper of defeat. “Tri’tried so hard ‘nd still. M’sorry.”
“It’s alright.” So unbelievably soft. Jon thought he’d ruined this long ago and the tears came somehow faster. “I think we need to call an ambulance, bud.”
“No...nonono…” Jon didn’t want to be poked and prodded by strangers and stuck full of needles alone in a cold sterile room. Even in his ragged state Jon could see Tim was torn. “Pl’please.”
“Okay, okay,” he soothed, gentling him with a touch. “But if you can’t keep this down we have to go.” Medicine. Lucozade. Fed to him mouthful by mouthful in the intervals he was awake.
Quiet sounds he recognized, Martin. Sasha. Hushed. Martin tipped the next sip into him and Jon wasn’t aware of much, but he was aware enough to know he was disgusting after having slept and sweated in the same bedclothes for days. Martin wouldn’t hear of it and Jon didn’t know where to put all the feelings and he was so tired of crying and couldn’t seem to stop.
Sasha, they told him, has gone out for supplies and they asked if he’d like help getting out of his uncomfortable trousers and button down, now missing several buttons no doubt from his restlessness. Jon didn’t trust his voice, only nodded, trying and failing to sit up, losing consciousness entirely when one of them levered him up with an arm behind his shoulders. Tim was explaining it to Martin when he came around, peering up at them through fluttering lashes.
“S’al’...” Clumsy, the words wouldn’t come to him.
Together, they shift his limbs, passing him back and forth between, one moment resting against Martin’s chest, another tucked into the hollow where Tim’s shoulder and neck meet. He should be helping but he can barely stay with them, just concentrating on the pulse currently beneath his ear to ground him. Carefully, as though he is some precious thing, they rid him of the awful, disagreeable stickiness and their low murmuring seems such an intimate thing. He isn’t worth it. This. And then soft, clean clothes, well worn and familiar and when Jon surfaces again he’s with Tim on the sofa, bundled up and more comfortable than he’d been in months.
Martin is changing his sheets.
“I’m sorry, Jon.” He didn’t know what for and shook his head, or tried anyway. “Made you think you had to push yourself like that. Ignored how exhausted you were and guilt tripped you into not telling us ‘no’.” Lord, so many words, Jon dizzied himself trying to catch them, hold them, decipher them. “You should be able to trust us, and I.” A suspicious sniff. “I’m sorry.” Jon relaxed into him with a hum he hoped conveyed something.
“I think I remembered which meds he tolerated best.” Sasha elbowed her way into the flat, face lighting up when she saw he was awake. Kind of. “Jon! Thank god. You were in such a bad way.” Whispery and rushed, the same feeling in it as with Tim. “Let's get you dosed up and back to bed, okay?”
It was late evening judging by the window. The reading lamp was on. Martin sat beside him with a book he couldn’t recognize by cover alone.
“Mah’in..?” So it hadn’t all been a hallucination after all.
“There you are.”
“Miss’d work.” He nodded, uncapping a bottle of sports drink and holding it to his chapped lips. Jon drank what he could.
“Not important right now, yeah?”
“Yeah.”
“Gave us a scare.” Easy, like it was nothing in the world to do it, Martin laid the back of his fingers against his neck, against his throat. “That’s a relief. Tim called us in a panic.” By way of explanation. “But I think you’re past the worst of it now.”
“Don’, don’ remember.”
“Probably for the best. We’ve decided, if you’re alright with the arrangement, that one of us should stay with you.” That sounded okay even if normally Jon would fight it tooth and nail. He did remember being alone and scared. “Tim and Sash are talking. I get the feeling we missed something very important.”
“Mm.” Jon tried to sit up and swooned, came around with a pillow behind his back.
“Dunno if I’ll get used to that any time soon though, I’ll be honest.”
“Happens sometimes. Th’that’s why…” Martin picked up the thread.
“You cancelled on us. I understand. And I hope, I hope you know you can always tell me, us, I hope, when you need to. There’s no shame in it. I’ll admit, I’m upset with Tim.” He fussed with the quilts, smoothing out imaginary creases. “He knew this was something to look out for and he didn’t tell me.”
“No, it’s--”
“Nothing to be embarrassed about.” Martin spoke with conviction. “Ever. I don’t want you to, to push yourself like this for a blasted game night. We can do other things as a department. Things that don’t jeopardize your health like this again.”
“Martin’s right.” Sasha sat at his feet, draping a hand over his ankle, and Tim stood at the foot of the bed. He looked proper chastised, eyes rimmed in red and swollen from crying.
“I’m so sorry, Jon. So sorry. I should never--I was angry and frustrated and used it to. To hurt you. Make you think we’d stop being friends over a stupid night out. Not like I lifted a hand to help you! When I knew you wouldn’t ask a second time!”
“S’okay.”
“It’s not!” Tim was a staunch friend. The type who got to know you so well and sometimes aimed too precisely at your soft parts. He didn’t need another telling off. Exhaustion lapping at his limbs, Jon curled his fingers in poor imitation of a come hither gesture. Willingly, Tim allowed himself to be pulled along by it, slotting himself beside Jon on the mattress to hide his own tears in his chest. Graceless, Jon managed to tug a hand over the back of his head, tangling fingers in Tim's hair, surrounded by friends and not alone.
“Will be, then.”
117 notes · View notes
viastro · 4 years
Text
despite everything, it’s still you | wen junhui
ミ★ synopsis: in which you only have eyes for your best friend, but he sees everyone else.
ミ★ genre: best friends to lovers!au, angst, some fluff, some humor
ミ★ warnings: mentions of vomit and drinking
ミ★ word count: 3,897
ミ★ pairings: junhui x female reader
ミ★ notes: hi guys ! i actually scrapped this last night when i first wrote it, but i came back to it a few hours ago and actually finished it. this isn’t one of my favorites, but i think it turned out better than i originally thought it would. so as always, please give jun lots of love !! and i hope you guys like this one <3
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“Aren’t you tired?” You turn your head to see Minghao staring at you with a pitiful expression on your face. Squinting, you respond, “Of what?” 
“Of being lonely.” You scoff, turning away and going back to typing on your computer as Mingyu and Minghao lose their shit beside you on the couch. You don’t even know why you invited the two stooges to your house as you did homework, but alas. 
you were lonely.
“I should’ve never invited you guys.” You mumble as you add the last few sentences to your essay. Mingyu giggles, walking over and wrapping an arm around you as his apology. While Minghao steps over and puts his face close to yours, giving you a big smile. 
“Forgive us queen.”
“Fuck you.” 
“Damn.” Mingyu mutters, raising a hand to his heart to feign offense. The corner of your lips tilts up at Mingyu’s reaction, and Minghao claps his hands. “She forgave us.”
“Aye, now I didn’t say all that-”
Minghao and Mingyu stop you as you turn around, hands raised in your direction. You stare boredly at the two as they give you a mischievous smile. “You forgave us, you can’t take it back.” 
Letting out a sigh, you run a hand through your hair, grinning at your two friends who are now discussing who gets to choose what movie. Your ears perk up when you hear the sound of your door opening, and the three of you turn to see Jun walking in with the containers holding the fried chicken. He lets out a grin at the sight of you guys, and you quickly call him over so that you can begin devouring the food he brought. 
The four of you have been friends since your first year at University. What started as a group project in your guys’ film course, became a three year long friendship that you all hope will last until you’re all old and wrinkly. 
Jun quickly settles himself down beside you, wrapping his arms around your shoulders in greeting, and you let out a soft smile. He gives you a grin, “Did you finish your essay?” 
You nod your head, and he lets go of his hold on you to throw a thumbs up your way. You let out a laugh, and run a hand through your hair, before turning back towards the chicken. 
Your guys’ friendship all began when the four of you got paired for that group project. However, you were attracted to Jun from the moment you laid eyes on him on the first day of class. When the four of you all got closer as friends, you decided to let go of trying to go after him. Especially when you found out how popular he is among the ladies and gentlemen at uni. 
His popularity has only grown since freshman year, and he’s been with his fair share of different people. You claim to be over him, but it’s you simply just ignoring the warmth in your heart whenever he pulls you into a hug, or the pain whenever he introduces his new fling to you. 
It’s your biggest secret that you’ve been harboring, and Minghao is the only one that knows. He wasn’t even supposed to know of your feelings for Jun, but he stumbled in on you crying on the floor after Jun left on a date with this one girl a few months back. 
In your defense, you were incredibly stressed with midterms and seeing Jun go on a date with another girl that isn’t you, really set you off the edge from that stinky week in general. However, Minghao refuses to believe that you being stressed was the main cause for you crying over Jun going on a date. 
So that’s why you ignore Minghao’s gaze when Jun hands you the crispy part of the chicken you always enjoy most. You turn and give Jun a smile, and he fondly knocks his head into yours. “It’s your favorite part, right?”
Nodding your head, you place it into your mouth, and Jun grins happily. He turns back towards his food, and takes a big bite of chicken as the four eat in a relative silence. Mingyu glances over at Jun, letting out a mischievous smile. 
“How was your date?” You freeze slightly, and Minghao notices, his eyes trailing over to your rigid form. Jun chuckles, shrugging his shoulders as he wipes his hands on a napkin. Leaning back into the couch, he lets out a breath. 
“It was good. She was actually more funny than I expected.” Jun explains briefly, and Mingyu nods his head. You stay quiet as you eat, knowing that if the two end up going on a second date, you’ll have to meet her in the near future. 
“She kinda reminded me of you.” You pause, turning to see that Jun is staring at you with a fond smile on his face. You raise an eyebrow, pointing at yourself with the drumstick in hand, and Jun chuckles, nodding his head. “Yeah, you.” 
“How?” Minghao asks, and you shoot him a glance. Minghao just waves you off with his hand, and you widen your eyes with more urgency, but he chooses to ignore you. Jun thinks to himself for a moment, before chuckling. 
“Yn’s humor is really weird, you know. Remember the time she just laughed to herself about that video of a bird jumping off a building?” You snort at the memory, raising a hand to your mouth to try and hide your laugh as you remember the video. Jun turns to you with amusement painted over his features, and he points at you with his thumb, “See? She’s just giggling from the thought of it.” 
“It was funny!”
“You sadist.”
“I am not a sadist!” You exclaim, and Mingyu purses his lips. He turns his head away and takes a sip of water, while Minghao takes a bite of chicken. You squint at the two, before turning to Jun and seeing him also avoiding eye contact with you. “I’m not!” 
“Anyways…” Jun begins, and you roll your eyes. He chuckles and pats your head before continuing, “Aiya was kinda like yn, in a way. She laughed over silly things, and made good jokes, so the atmosphere was nice.” 
Your mood drops slightly, and you turn away. Mingyu changes the subject by bringing up the time he saw you painting a meme of kermit on a canvas, and you laugh at the memory. Jun turns to glance at you when he hears your laugh, and he smiles softly at you. 
Minghao bites the inside of his cheek, wondering when the two of you will finally realize that you’re a perfect match so that the pain on both sides will stop. He’s the middle ground, with him knowing that you love Jun, while also being able to tell that Jun is in love with you based on the fact that everyone he goes on dates with is so oddly similar to you. He just questions whether the two of you will be able to realize that fact.
And with that, Minghao smiles, holding up the remote to turn on the TV. “Well, let’s watch a movie.” 
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Your head is laid over a sleeping Mingyu’s lap as you drunkenly listen to Aiya and Jun laugh together. You open and close your eyes slowly, staring up at the colorful lights displayed on the ceiling. You begin to wonder how many shots of soju you had, but you’re unable to come up with an answer when you hear Jun’s angelic laugh across from you. 
The music is loud and it hurts your head. You question how you were able to let the boys convince you to come to the party their friend Jungkook is throwing. However, the answer is simple. Jun gave you that smile of his and outstretched his hand towards you, telling you that he wants you to meet Aiya tonight. You wanted to decline the invite and stay home, maybe have a self care night as you knew you were going to simply have an aneurysm at the thought of Aiya and Jun. The thing is that you can’t ever say no to Jun, so that’s how you’re here now.
At a party you don’t want to be at.
With Jun and his potential new girlfriend sitting right across from you as you try to sleep on Mingyu’s lap because you couldn’t walk straight anymore. You were originally going to get another shot of soju, but Minghao threw you over his shoulder and brought you back to their group, laying you down on the already passed out Mingyu’s lap so that you can just go to sleep instead. It’s not working though, because every few seconds you hear Aiya’s giggle and Jun’s laughter. 
And you hate it.
Aiya’s a nice girl, and you think she’s incredibly beautiful. You don’t blame Jun for wanting to date her, you would’ve gone for her too if you weren’t so hung up over Jun. You’re sure that the two of you would’ve gotten along, but the pain from seeing her and Jun was too apparent that it made it hard for you to try and initiate any close friendship. You don’t think she minds though, as she’s been attached to Jun’s arm the whole time. 
Minghao glances down at you, and he finds you wordlessly staring up at the ceiling. He purses his lips, turning to look at Jun to see him having a pleasant conversation with Aiya. Not even noticing the state that you’re in, let alone care. So Minghao stands up from the couch and bends down beside you, resting a hand on your shoulder. You turn to glance at Minghao, and you see the sad smile on his face. 
“Wanna go home?” He asks you, and you nod your head. He helps you sit up from the couch, but you move too fast, and you feel the alcohol coming back up. Minghao’s eyes widen at the lack of color to your face, “Wait yn-”
You vomit over his shoes, which leads to a chorus of screams from Minghao, and Mingyu waking up to the sound of said screams. Next thing you know, you’re being carried by Jun into the bathroom, and he’s setting you down on the counter. 
“I hope Hao doesn’t hate me.” You mumble as Jun wets a paper towel from under the sink. He lets out a small chuckle, shaking his head. “Hao could never hate you.” 
He begins wiping the area around your mouth, making sure to get rid of all the traces of alcohol. You stare into his eyes as he concentrates on cleaning you up, finding them to be his most beautiful feature even through your drunken haze. Jun feels your intense stare, and he glances up into your eyes, feeling his heart rate quicken slightly. He keeps eye contact with you for a moment, and you wonder if he knows. 
does he know how much i love him? how could he not after all this time? 
Jun looks away first, coughing into his shoulder. He grabs the mouthwash from the cabinet, pouring out a bit into the cap and handing it to you with a soft smile. “Let’s gargle some mouthwash, okay?” 
After you’re sure that you no longer smell of vomit, the two of you step out of the bathroom. You’re about to walk down the stairs when you see doors leading to a balcony down the hallway, so you turn the opposite direction and head towards it. Jun raises an eyebrow, following after you. 
“Yn, where are you going?”
“Fresh air.” 
“You can get fresh air when we head to Minghao’s car. Come on, I’m taking you home.” Jun states, reaching out to grasp your wrist, but you pull your arm out of his grip. Jun’s slightly taken aback, not used to you reacting like that before. However, he blames it on you being under the influence. You open the doors to the balcony and walk up to the ledge, resting your hands on it as you stare up at the stars. 
Jun walks up beside you, turning to glance down at you as you close your eyes. He lets out a breath, seeing how the moonlight illuminates your features. You open your eyes, and Jun frowns when he sees tears fall down your cheeks. He reaches out and grasps your face with both hands, turning you towards him. “What’s wrong?”
You swat his hands away, but Jun refuses to let go. The tears continue to stream past your face, and Jun grows more concerned by the minute. “Yn?”
You close your eyes and push Jun away, and he feels a sense of shock hit him. You’ve never been so physical with Jun, and he’s confused as to why you’re pushing him away now. You glance up at the sky, and at this moment, you wonder if the stars are laughing at your fate. “Did I do something wrong?” 
“No.” You mutter, and Jun tilts his head to the side because he knows when you lie. The two of you are best friends, you know each other's mannerisms now.
“Why are you lying to me?”
“I’m not.” 
“Yn, you’re lying.” Jun states, and you look away. You stare down at the ground over the ledge, watching the sprinklers turn on and begin watering the grass. Jun bites the inside of his cheek, attempting to reach out to you, but you step away. 
“Yn. What did I do wrong-”
“I love you.” You confess, and the words die in Jun’s throat at your confession. 
“I’ve loved you for years, and it hurts to know that you’ll never love me back. It hurts so fucking bad whenever you introduce me to your new fling and I have to put on a fake smile.” You explain, and Jun stands there in silence. He watches as you hurriedly try to wipe away the tears continuing to fall from your eyes, but it’s not working. You let out the most sad smile Jun has ever seen, and he wants nothing more than to take away the pain you’re feeling. 
“Why didn’t you tell me?” Jun asks, and you scoff, turning away and looking back up at the stars. He frowns at your reaction, and you begin to wonder if the stars could ever be brighter than the galaxy in Jun’s eyes. 
“Yn?” You turn to glance at Jun, staring into his eyes, while his trail after the tear falling from your left eye.
You decide that the stars are no rival to Jun’s galaxy. 
“How could I tell my best friend that I love him, when he’s never even noticed me.” You state, and Jun shakes his head frantically at you. You squint at him, and he reaches out to grasp your hand, but you pull away again. 
“Yn-”
“Are you going to tell me that I’m wrong? How am I wrong when all you’ve done since the beginning was introduce me to the people you go on dates with, huh? How am I wrong when you’ve never once caught onto the fact that I love you.” Your sadness slowly turns into anger at the way Jun stares at you in shock. You shake your head, trying to wipe away the tears that continue to fall past your eyes, wondering how many tears you’ve shed for the man in front of you.
Jun just can’t help but stare, feeling his own heart break within his chest at how stupid he is. How he never noticed. How he never admitted that he loved you. How he dated around to try and fill the void in his heart that can only be filled when he’s with you. How is he so stupid?
You cover your face with your hands for a moment, feeling pathetic at the fact that you can’t stop crying. You finally look back up at Jun after a second, and you shake your head at him. You take a step towards him, and point your finger directly over his heart, and look up into his eyes. 
“Despite everything, it’s still you.” You whisper, and Jun’s mouth opens and closes as he tries to think of the words to say. While you just stare into his eyes, the tears continue to fall past your own.
You question whether or not the love and sadness you see in his eyes is just a reflection of your own.
“But it’s not me for you, right?” You ask, and Jun doesn’t respond. He’s internally quaking at the fact that you love him, but you don’t know that.
So you take his silence as his answer, taking a step back, you give him a sad smile. Running a hand through your hair, you turn to walk off the balcony and back into the house. Your hand rests on the doorknob when Jun finally speaks. 
“It’s always been you.” You freeze, hand clutching the doorknob when you turn to look at Jun. The moonlight casts a glow over his skin as he stares at you, and you come to the answer that the love and sadness in his gaze isn’t just a reflection of your own.
“What?” Jun takes a few steps towards you and grasps your hand. You stare down at your connected hands, and you wonder why you pulled away in the first place.
this whole hand holding shit is nice. 
“It’s always been you, yn. I love you, and I’m so, so sorry it took this long for me to finally tell you.” Jun confesses, and now it’s your turn to just stare at him in a shocked silence. “I’m so sorry for all the tears you’ve shed, and all the pain I’ve caused because of my own stupidity.” 
You bite the inside of your cheek, “Why didn’t you tell me?”
“I- I was stupid. I never thought you would give me the time of day, or-”
“Have you seen yourself?!” You sputter, and Jun shrugs in reply. “You’re the most handsome guy I’ve ever seen! And when I got to know you, I saw you as the most perfect human being.” 
“I just! I didn’t know! I’m stupid yn, you know this.” Jun says with a little laugh, and you can’t help but giggle back, shaking your head at him. Jun lets go of your hand so that he can reach up and grasp your face with both of his hands, wiping away the tears with the pads of his thumbs. 
“So please stop crying. You shouldn’t let yourself cry over me. I’m not as great as you think considering the fact that I couldn’t even tell that the girl I’m in love with loves me back.” Jun mutters, and you let out another giggle, causing him to smile. You shake your head at him, and he leans down, resting his forehead onto yours as the two of you stare into each other’s eyes.
“I’m stupid, and I know this is so long overdue. But if you’d let me, I’d like to take you out on a date.” Jun whispers, and you let out a smile at how ridiculous this all is. Just a minute ago, you were pouring out your heart to this man under the assumption that he didn’t love you back on the balcony of Jungkook’s house. Speaking of Jungkook’s house, you pause when you remember who Jun came with. 
“What about Aiya?” You ask, and Jun purses his lips at the thought of her, and you scrunch up your nose when the action causes him to peck the tip of your nose.
“She kept seeing me take glances at you throughout the night. So when you threw up over Hao’s shoes and saw me immediately stand up, she told me to be with you. She said it was rather upsetting how I go for everyone else when it’s obvious that I only have eyes for you.” Jun mutters sheepishly, and you decide that you do like Aiya. She’s cool.
“She did not lie.”
“Nope, not one bit.” Jun agrees, and you chuckle. The two of you stare into each other’s eyes for a moment in silence, and Jun leans back so that he can get a glimpse of your whole face. He smiles fondly at the sight of the sparkles in your eyes.
“So, what do you say?” Jun asks, and you find a smile breaking out over your features as you nod your head.
“Yes Jun, I’d love to go out with you.”
“Fucking FINALLY!” You and Jun jump apart at the sudden voice, just to find Mingyu and Minghao standing by the balcony doors, with Minghao holding his shoes in a plastic bag. You mutter out a quiet apology, and Minghao raises his hand up towards you, basically saying that it’s okay. 
“How long have you been standing there?” Jun asks, his hand resting on your waist, and your heart does a a fucking windmill within your chest. 
“Long enough to know that you two stopped being stupid.” Minghao answers, and Mingyu lets out a sleepy smile. You purse your lips at Minghao’s snarkiness, but then remember that you just threw up on his shoes. 
“Anyways, can we head back to my apartment now? I just wanna eat ramen and watch Train to Busan or something.” You and Jun turn to glance at each other before turning back to your two friends. 
“Yeah sure, but you know how yn gets when we watch that movie.” Jun says as the four of you begin walking off the balcony. You pinch his side, causing him to chuckle. 
“It’s not my fault that shit hurted.” You mumble, and Mingyu grins. The four of you walk down the stairs and out of the house after bidding goodbye to Jungkook, who is currently vibing with Taehyung in a corner of the room. 
Minghao glances down at his throw up shoes in the bag, before turning back towards you and Jun, seeing the two of you walking with happy smiles on your faces. When you all finally reach the car and step inside, he lets out a sigh, and the three turn to look at him.
“I guess we have yn throwing up on my shoes to thank.” Minghao jokes, and the three burst into laughter while you profusely apologize for vomiting on Minghao’s sneakers. He pats your head, “It’s okay. You and Jun finally being together makes up for it.” 
Jun tilts his head to the side, “Really?”
To which Minghao turns in the driver's seat to glance at Jun in the backseat beside you, and he shoots him a death glare. “No, that only applies to yn. You owe me new shoes.” 
Jun rolls his eyes, cursing Minghao under his breath as he rests his head onto your shoulder, and you smile softly. You press a kiss to the top of Jun’s head before closing your eyes. Jun closes his eyes as well, a smile displayed on his features.
After a few minutes of silence into the car ride, Minghao glances up into the rearview mirror, just to find you and Jun fast asleep. With his head resting on your shoulder, and your head resting over his head, and he lets out a quiet chuckle. 
You and Jun are finally happy.
And Minghao couldn’t have wished for anything better.
465 notes · View notes
laventae · 4 years
Text
Serendipity
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Summary: You accidentally bump into Suna once, then a second time, then a third time.... before it starts seeming like fate has already decided its course for the both of you.
Pairings: Suna Rintaro x F!reader
Genre: Mostly fluff, College/Uni au
Word count: 2.6k words
Part: (1) , 2 , (3) , (TBC)
(A/N: This chapter is shorter than what I had in mind, but I kind of want to leave it with that ending. Maybe I’ll make the next one slightly longer. Anyways..)
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Ring Ring 
Ring Ring
‘I hope I don’t run into him today...’ you think before you jolt up on your bed and reach for your phone.
You dismiss the alarm and sit in bed for a few minutes, thinking about the night before.
Your heart rate quickens when you think about how badly the night could’ve ended, with the creepy old man following you out of the bar, and almost following you home. And how grateful you were when your ‘neighbor’ stepped in to help you out.  
You curl yourself up in a ball and hold back a scream when you think about how you lied to him about where you lived, only to see him again in front of your actual apartment, a couple of minutes later.
‘No, you know what, I did nothing wrong’ you assure yourself as you sit up in bed again, ‘I just wanted to play it safe, and after what happened with that creep, nobody can blame me for doing what I did, right?’
You sigh as you get out of bed and head to the bathroom to freshen up.
‘I still hope I don’t run into him today...’ you think to yourself, again, as you leave the bathroom and head for the kitchen to have a quick bite, before getting ready for work.
After about an hour, you’ve already finished having breakfast and you get ready to head out. You look at the time
8:48 A.M
‘Yeah, my shift starts at 9, so I guess I should head out right now’
You grab your bag and keys, then head for the door to put on your shoes.
When you were done, you open the door to your apartment. You stop in your tracks as soon as you notice your neighbor leaving his apartment as well.
‘Are you kidding me?’ you think, as you both stare at each other for a moment.
You clear your throat, leaving your apartment, then close the door behind you. You notice him do the same, turning his back to you to make sure he locks his door.
“Good morning...!” you try to greet him, hoping to dissolve the awkwardness you felt between the both of you.
He turns around to face you when he was done and nods, “Good morning” he replies, the same blank expression from yesterday plastered on his face. He then starts walking to the elevator.
‘I can’t read him at all; does he even remember what happened yesterday?’
“Wait!” you call out to him and he stops and turns around to face you.
‘Wait, what even am I supposed to say right now?’
“Yes?” he asks when you don’t say anything.
You walk up to him, and look at the floor embarrassed, “I just uh... wanted to thank you again... for yesterday,” you look up at him again, “And I'm sorry for lying to you about where I lived, when you were just trying to help”
He looks at you for a few seconds, and you feel yourself become uneasy under his sharp gaze, before he finally nods and speaks up again, “No, it’s understandable. You did good” he pats your head for a second, before looking away, turning to the elevators, “And you don’t have to thank me” he continues as he starts walking to the elevators once again.
You feel yourself slightly flush at the sudden and unexpected action, still frozen in place where he left you, and you curse yourself in your head for thinking he sounded super cool just then.
‘I still can’t read him at all, though...’ you think before turning back to him, and notice him entering the elevator.
“Wait!” you call out again, “Wait for me!”
You rush to elevator and notice him holding the door open, looking at his phone, but looks up at you for a second before you get in. He goes back to scrolling on his phone as the door closes.
“Uhmm...” you hesitantly start, noticing him look up at you from the corner of your eye, “I’d still like to thank you, though. Uh, I work at this café, like five minutes away from here, it’s called The Hub Café,” you pause for a second to look at him, he doesn’t say anything, waiting for you to continue, “If you, like, ever want to pass by and have some coffee, or anything really, it’s on me”
He still doesn’t say anything, just stares at you. You look away, becoming uneasy under his gaze, once again. 
Needing to fill the silence, you speak up again, “I mean, I know it isn’t much, and it definitely doesn’t compare to how you helped me out yesterday, but-”
Your rambling, however, is interrupted when you hear him chuckle lightly, and you look at him feeling embarrassed again.
“I’ll think about it” he tells you casually, and looks back at his phone, but you notice a faint smile on his lips.
‘Wow, so he can smile, huh...?’ you think to yourself but feel yourself slightly flush when you notice yourself staring at him.
“Right...” you mumble as the elevator door opens and he gets off, heading for the apartment building door.
‘Well, I think that went well?’ you sigh as you get off the elevator as well.
-~-~-
You hear the door of the café open and you quickly look up from the register, subconsciously hoping it was him.
‘What am I even thinking right now...’ you sigh, slightly disappointed, when you see a random customer come in instead.
A week has passed by since the last time you saw him.
It kind of starts making you feel bad. I mean was he avoiding you on purpose? Or was he just super busy? Did he even leave his apartment at all? Or has he not even been there this whole time?
You slowly start noticing yourself glance up at the door, at you part-time job, more often. Whenever someone comes in, you somewhat hope it’s him. You subconsciously start leaving your house every day around the same time you left the last time you both bumped into each other, before you left for work. You take your time unlocking the door when you get home, hoping he would also get home around the same time, or maybe leave his apartment by then.
But, nothing.
“Thank you for your hard work! Have a nice weekend!” you hear your boss call out to you as you head for the door at the end of your shift.
“Thank you! You too!” you answer and leave the café.
You sigh, ‘he didn’t come today either...’
Lately, you’ve been trying your best to cut back on taking late night shifts, scared of having another run-in with that old man. And thankfully, it’s only about 3 p.m in the afternoon right now, people still out, bustling around the shops, so you felt comfortable walking back home on your own.
You groan as you start making your way back home.
‘Why am I even still thinking about him? Whatever...' you think as you grab your phone from your bag and call Hina, to try and get your mind off of it.
The line rings a couple of times before she picks up.
“Heyy y/n!” she answers the phone, her usual excited tone never failing to cheer you up when you wanted to.
“Hey Hina, you busy right now?”
“Nope, not all, what's up?” she asks sounding concerned.
“Nothing specific, was hoping you would keep me company as I walk back home”
“OH! Of course! So... what’s on your mind, hm?”
“Huh? Nothing... Like I said, I just wanted the company”
You hear her laugh on the other end of the line, “You pretend like we haven’t been best friends for the last 2 years, you know. So come on, spill. I know you always call me like this when you’re overthinking something, so, what is it?”
“Nothing...” you say pouting, and you hear her laugh again.
“Who’s bothering you? Is it your boss? Or Oh! Is it about that guy? Your neighbor? Did you run into him again?”
You sigh, “Well, yes, it's about him... But no, it’s more like, what’s bothering me is that I haven’t run into him again, how is that even possible? He literally lives right in front of me!”
“There it is,” you hear her giggle before she continues, “Listen, I don’t know what happened with him, but honestly, you need to just forget about him”
Frankly speaking, you haven’t really told her exactly what happened between the both of you. You just told her that he helped you out of an uncomfortable situation a couple of days prior. It’s not that you were hiding something from her, you knew you were eventually going to tell her what happened, but honestly, you yourself still hadn’t wrapped your head around how that night unfolded, so you weren't really ready to talk to her about it just yet.
Besides, the fact that she always hated you insisting on walking everywhere didn’t help, especially at night. She always offered to walk you back home herself, drive you back, or at least call a cab for you. She’s always been protective of you like that. So, you know that all hell would break loose when she hears about what happened, and you weren't ready for her berating you about it. It was all out of love, you knew that, but you just weren’t ready yet.
“I know... I know...” you sigh again, “I’m trying. Anyways, it’s just stupid, like I was just trying to thank him, but whatever” you continue as you notice you were almost close to your apartment building.
“Hey, you know what? I know what would help you get your mind off him. How about that date I was telling you about?” she asks, getting excited again.
‘Cupid Hina is back’ you think as you roll your eyes.
“Really? Right now?” you chuckle.
“Yes! It’s literally the perfect time, come on! It’ll help you get your mind off things”
“You won’t quit even if I say no, will you?”
“You know I won’t” she says and you hear her giggle.
You groan as you get into your building.
“I promise you, he’s super cool, and super nice, I’m literally one hundred percent sure you guys would hit it off” she continues.
You sigh as you wait next to elevator, “How is he any different from all the other people you set me up with?”
“I just know” she answers you, way too confident.
You sigh again, “And you told me he was your cousin or something? Rintaro? That was his name, right?”
“Yes! He just got back from abroad, like, a couple of weeks ago. So, what do you think about it? This weekend maybe? You’re off tomorrow, right?”
“Sure, sure, whatever,” you answer, hoping to just end the call before you get in the elevator, “tomorrow is fine”
“Yaaaay! Alright, I'll text you the details later tonight, alright?”
“Alright.” you both say your goodbyes before you get in the elevator and get to your apartment.
No sign of your neighbor that day either.
-~-~-
You get to the restaurant early, and the host guides you to your table.
“Here are your menus,” they say, placing a menu on the table in front of you, and on the opposite side of the table, where your date is supposed to sit, “If you need anything else, please let me know”
“Alright, thank you” you say. They nod and walk back to welcome the other guests.
You usually prefer going early to places you’ve never been to, especially when going on dates, just so you could check the ambiance of the place and familiarize yourself with the area and menu before your date gets there. Somehow, that makes you feel more comfortable.
However, this time, the place Hina tells you that your date booked was a much fancier restaurant than the usual, which, similarly, makes you even more nervous than usual. You don’t usually opt to go on fancy restaurant dates, you’re much more comfortable in more casual settings.
You wait for about 15 minutes, going through the menu a couple of times and checking your phone occasionally, until you notice it’s past the time when your date was supposed to be there. You look around the restaurant but only see couples sitting around on their tables, probably on dates as well, but nobody else was coming in.
You sigh and decide to go to the toilet and freshen up for a bit.
After doing so, you wash your hands and look at the mirror.
‘What am I even doing here...?’ you sigh to yourself, ‘If he doesn’t get here in 10 minutes, I'm legally allowed to leave, right?’
You chuckle to yourself at how lame that sounded, but you decide to go with it anyway. If he doesn’t get here in ten minutes, you’ll leave.
You nod your head at your reflection before grabbing a paper towel, and drying your hands.
You take one last look in the mirror, fixing your hair, before leaving the toilet.
You look around the restaurant, then to your table, and find nobody there, still.
You take out your phone to text Hina as you walk to your table,
TO ‘Wifeyy <3’: “Queen, he’s nowhere to be seen, I think he’s the one who ditched this ti-”
You accidentally bump into someone before finishing the text and you drop your phone.
“Sorry! I wasn’t looking!” you say, bending down to grab your phone but the person you bumped into reaches it first.
“Oh, thank yo-” you’re cut off, flustered, when you notice your neighbor standing in front of you.
It seems like he was startled for a second as well, before you both straighten up and he hands you your phone.
“Uhm, thank you”
“No problem”
You both stand there awkwardly for a few moments.
‘Who would’ve thought? He looks good, all dressed up...’
You curse that thought before you look at him and speak up again, “Wait, what are you doing here?”
He looks at you for second before looking around the restaurant, looking for something, or someone(?), “Oh, I'm actually supposed to be meeting someone here,” he looks back at you and stares you up and down, not really in an intimidating way, more like he was analyzing the way you looked, “what about you? On a date?”
‘How can he even say, or do, things like that so casually?’
You couldn’t help but flush at the way he was looking at you, so you look away, slightly embarrassed.
“Uhm- Yeah- I guess something like that”
‘Why do we have to keep bumping into each other like this?’
“What about you?” you ask, turning to him again, “On a date as well?”
“I guess?” he answers, as he scratches the back of his head, “I mean, my cousin set me up on this blind date with her friend or something, but I think I might've been a bit late. I'm not sure if she’s still her-”
“Wait” you interrupt him
‘Wait... there’s no way...’
‘No, there’s definitely no way...’ you think as you unconsciously let out a laugh.
“What?” he asks, looking at you, confused, and your eyes snap to him.
“Uh, is your name Rintaro, by any chance?”
“Yes, why?”
‘You’ve gotta be kidding me...’
“And is your cousin’s name Hina, by any chance?”
He looks at you confused and was about to answer, before it clicks with him as well.
“You’re y/n?”
You laugh nervously, “Yeah...”
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in which you study in a different country and meet someone along the way.  
hi lovelies! this is my fic for miss olivia’s @bfharry​ boyfriendathon! i’ve had this concept for a year now, and i’m so happy i was finally able to write it!
thank you to @bopbopstyles​ @stellarboystyles & @avhrodite​ for beta-ing! <3
enjoy 7.5k words of friends to lovers & uni!harry & boyfriend!harry !! also the story is supposed to go semi-fast since it is mostly flashbacks, the sparkly breaks will tell you when the flashbacks start and end! 
i’ve made a playlist for this fic! if anyone would like to listen while reading click here
please please leave feedback! super excited for this because it’s probably a fav of mine and i’m really proud of it, so i would love to know what you think! a reblog, comment, and/or ask would mean a lot! <3
The birds were chirping and the sun was beaming on you, leaving a glow to your skin that had shined ever so brightly, giving you a healthy and lovely tint to your skin. It was a lovely day that there was not an ounce of complaint in your mind because of the beautiful weather Mother Nature decided to provide you with, knowing that you hadn’t gotten perfect weather for the past few weeks. The trees and grass were as green as ever as slight wind rustled between the leaves, making the sound of the crisp leaves loud. 
It was a moment like this where you felt so happy and grateful to be in a beautiful city; that you had made the right decision. The London view and atmosphere does not compare to any other place in the world, aside from the fact that you haven’t been to many places in your life. But you’re a bit biased on your opinion because London graced you with your boyfriend, Harry. You remembered the first time you came to London just two years ago, and you never imagined how your life had planned out until this very moment. 
⋇⋆✦⋆⋇
You had stepped on the plane with nervous thoughts running through your head. It was the first time you ever rode a plane, and your destination was hours away, practically a full day. It was a major step, and you probably should’ve thought it through; maybe traveling to the next state, but to travel to another country was a big step for you. 
It wasn’t a vacation, more like, school in a different country for a few months. You had decided to study abroad when you were in high school, wanting to get away from home and also learning in a brand new place without the toxicity hanging onto your foot as you try walking away. It had taken a while to finally study abroad because the requirements of you needing to finish your first year of college before you could study in the fall. 
Your family hadn’t taken it well, but you decided that there was nothing you could do to stop them. You were going to pay for the trip and your expenses all on your own. It definitely helped that you got a scholarship to go to university in the first place, and lucky enough to live on campus away from home.
You were sad that they didn’t feel an ounce of happiness for you, and you had asked your cousin to take you to the airport, being the only person to bid you goodbye. The feeling was overbearing and overwhelming, making your heart sink but at the same time feel full with sadness. At the time, you had felt like everything was holding you back and you just wanted to get away. 
A new start was needed. 
It was August when you traveled alone to London. Anxiety was boiling in your throat as you craved the need to hold onto something as the ride was quite bumpy, making you sweat and shake. But you survived, and you were at your new home. At least for the next 4 months. 
It wasn’t a hard decision to decide to study abroad, but you really hoped you met good people and made friends. It had always been a struggle making and keeping a good batch of people in your life. You had thought it was easy to make friends during your time in London; no one knows you and they don’t know your insecurities. So, you thought it was going to be easy.
And luckily, you were right. 
You had met your three best girl friends, all that you had shared a small place with. The common room had held so many memories between the four of you, and you felt so immensely grateful for them. Late night talks and laughs while drinking wine and eating snacks were some of your best memories. You had missed the common room greatly. 
One night, Tanya had suggested a night out on their first week there, “let’s all go out with the guys tonight! I already met Peter, and we talked about going out, so we could introduce you to everyone!” 
The girls and guys were stoked for the most part, and you were excited too, but also nervous, hoping the guys had found something interesting about you. 
And that was the night you met Harry. 
Some of the students that went to university in London shared a dorm with the abroad students until they left. Half were in the art program and the other half was the journalism program. Two of the girls in your dorm, Donna and Sophie, were in the journalism class, and you and Tanya were in the art one. You had wished everyone was in the same class, but that made get togethers and dinners at night way more fun because it had felt like everyone had so much to catch up on, and the fun was at the highest level. 
You had seen Harry approximately twice within your first week, but it was merely just from passing. But that night was the first proper night you hung out with him and everyone else. 
You couldn’t deny that he was insanely attractive. Just at first glance he had that sort of charm to him that was irresistible and alluring, wanting more after he was done talking. He was a bit on the quiet side when you met him, but learned that he started getting louder and talkative once you warmed up to him. He was outgoing and fun, the life of the party once he had a drink or two in his system, and when he does have some liquid courage, he gets cuddly and affectionate. 
“Do you want another drink?” He asked in his buzzed state. 
“I think I’m okay right now, and who’s going to take care of you when you keep having more?” You teased. It was definitely the alcohol talking because you would have never voluntarily teased someone like that. 
“Well, we have a few people in our group.” It had made your heart flutter when he said ‘our.’ You had never had a group of friends to call yours, and although it was only the first week, you had known they were going to be a group of special people close to your heart. 
“Our friend group is also drunk off their asses, so I think there needs to be a responsible person right now, and that is me,” you put your hands under your chin and started fluttering your eyes innocently. Harry thought you were the most charming and sweetest girl he’s ever met, and it had only been a week. 
“Okay, whatever you say, missy,” he teased. You held back your big smile, corners of your lips turned up. 
“Go get your drink. I’ll wait here,” you pushed his shoulder slightly towards the bar with a chuckle. 
“Ooh, bossy. I like it,” he said with a wink before he headed towards the bar. You were lucky that he had already left to get a drink, or else he would’ve seen your face turn into a light red shade, flustered from his actions.  
As the night went on, Harry had practically clung onto you when he was buzzed, and never let you go until everyone walked back to the dorms. 
“No, don’t wanna leave ya,” he whined a bit when you tried handing him off to his friend. “Nooo, don’t make me go with him,” he pouted as if he was a child. You had gigged, thinking he was the absolute cutest when he was drunk (and not drunk) as he clung onto you until you physically had to put him in his bed.
His arms were still tight around you, your body was laying slightly on top of him. Lazy smiles and droopy eyes were made at you, causing you to chuckle. 
“Mmm. Hello,” he said with a giggle. 
“Hi. You okay?” 
“Yup. Perfect. You know...you’re very pretty,” he says as he smiled. Although he was drunk, Harry was telling the truth. 
“Thank you.” And although he was drunk, it still made you smile. 
“Mhm…” he mumbled in response. The silence between you two was enough to lull him to sleep; arms were still around you. 
“Goodnight, Harry,” you said against his forehead, giving him a small kiss as you tried your best to slip out of his hold. 
That moment had changed everything. 
The two of you had gotten closer after that night. The next day, you bumped into him in the lobby of the building and he asked if you wanted to walk to class with him. 
You laughed about it with him as you walked, “you were so cute last night.” 
“Yeah, M’sorry about that. I get like that when m’drunk,” he shyly said. 
“No need to apologize. I’m glad you had fun,” you said with a smile. He had smiled back at you as he felt the butterflies in his stomach flutter around. 
You and Harry spent almost everyday after class together or in between classes for a quick bite to eat. There was a usual coffee shop near the building that you would always meet each other at on Mondays and Wednesdays. On Tuesday, you two would walk together to a fish n’ chips spot for lunch. On Thursdays, it was a sandwich shop. Fridays you saved your outings for that night as everyone got together on Fridays. 
“We could make this our thing, y’know?” Harry suggested. 
“Fish n’ Chips Tuesdays?” You beamed at him. 
“Yeah, and coffee shop Mondays and Wednesdays, and sandwich shop Thursdays,” he was quite nervous getting that out, but he managed to do it with a smile. 
“That would be nice. Don't you think you would get tired of me?” You teased him, raising your eyebrow as you took a handful of fries and shoving them in your mouth. You hadn’t realized, at the time, how unattractive you might’ve looked, but Harry couldn’t help but smile and fall deeper. 
And he never got tired of you. 
Aside from having lunch and coffee everyday together, you had taken him to art museums. He wasn’t horrible at trying to interpret art, but looking at you beside him as you gazed at the art above yourself was something that he was fond of. He smiled every time you got lost in the art as you studied it, passionately looking up, trying to figure out what each piece means to you. It was admirable, really. 
“You’re gonna be up there one day, watch,” he had whispered to you as you were in a daze. You chuckled as you looked at him, seeing if he was messing around. He wasn't though. He had seen your paintings and sketches, and thought that you deserved to be hung up high in the gallery. 
“You’re sweet,” you smiled and he put his arm around your shoulder, bringing you closer to his side. The affection had made you blush, thinking how you were falling for your best friend. 
After two months into studying abroad, you felt the happiest you’ve ever been. Aside from the constant moving around and trying your best to explore every part of the city, you felt like you belonged there. All those years living, you felt like you weren’t truly living, and being in London was possibly one of the best decisions you’ve ever made. 
You felt at peace. You were calm, and genuinely happy. Your head wasn’t racing like it was back in your hometown, and you weren’t anxiously looking over your shoulder, realizing that no one really is after you. 
The group decided to take a trip to Paris for the day, and the rest of the days would be spent hitting up a city or two. Everyone had the week off; a bit like spring break as you finished the first half of studying abroad. Everyone was super excited, and you haven’t been to Paris before so it was going to be a new place that you could check off from your list with your favorite people. 
It was a two and a half hour train ride from London to Paris, so you had loaded up a two hour playlist for the ride. 
At the time, it seemed like everyone knew that you were crushing on Harry, except Harry himself. When everyone boarded, the only seat empty was the one next to him. You weren’t mad, in fact, you were thrilled that the seat next to him was vacant. When you sat next to him, his eyes beamed, glad to see you, and you looked over at your friends as they gave you that teasing eye look while you rolled your eyes. 
“Anyone sitting here?” You asked and he shook his head no, giving you a small smile to sit down.
Everyone was still tired, considering it was 7 in the morning, and the group wanted to stay in Paris for the entire day. You yawned and Harry looked at you, giving you a soft smile. You grabbed your earphones out of your purse, handing one earphone to him and placing the other in your ear. In that moment, Harry was so happy as you two listened to Frank Sinatra on the way to Paris, placing your head on your shoulder and his on your head as Frank lulled you both into a nap before your adventure together. 
The entire day was eventful, but exhausting. With everyone on their feet, they were all ready to crash and luckily it was nearing sunset before the last train of the day. 
The last touristy place was the famous Eiffel Tower. Everyone had decided to get some wine and snacks as the whole group sat on a big blanket in the grass area in front of the Eiffel Tower. The sun was slowly setting and the guys were playing with a soccer ball, passing it around as the girls drank and talked; music playing from the speaker Sophie had brought with her.
 You took a mental picture of the scene around you; the people, atmosphere, and the feeling. And you had softly smiled, thinking these are the people in your life that are going to be in your life forever. Despite the fact that half of you had to go separate ways, there was a certainty in your head that everyone will always end up back together again. 
The sun had fully set and the lights on the Eiffel Tower had turned on as it started twinkling, lighting up Paris since the sun had gone tired. The guys were getting tired as well, so they sat with the girls. Harry was on your right side, arm behind your back but he didn’t touch you as it rested on the blanket and he leaned on it. 
“Dance with me,” he whispered ever so softly in your ear. You turned towards him and he smiled. 
“Right now?” 
“Yes, right now. Please, dance with me,” he pleaded and you nodded. He had immediately gotten up and helped you up. 
‘A Sunday Kind of Love’ by Etta James began playing softly as you and Harry swayed. Your arms were around his neck and his were around your waist. Chests pressed together as you had felt his heartbeat that pounded through his chest that gladly traveled to your chest, making your heart beat in sync with his.
It was silent between you two. There were no outside noises interrupting your bubble as you two ignored the eyes your friends were giving you. It was just you and Harry, the music, and the Eiffel Tower that captured your love and kept it for memory sake as you swayed under the moonlight. 
Harry had pulled away from you, looking so intently in your eyes, fondness gleamed out of them.
“Be mine,” he said softly. “I’m fallin’ for you, and I’m fallin’ hard. Please be mine already?” You were about ready to cry in that moment, but tears glossed your eyes.
You nodded and he beamed, “Only if you agree to be mine as well because I’m falling for you too,” you added. 
Harry immediately nodded, “I’ve been yours…this whole time.”
“Harry…” 
“Yes, darling?” The pet name had come unexpected, but you loved it nonetheless. 
“Kiss me.”
He took your face in his hands, brushing away the strands of hair that had covered your pretty eyes before capturing your lips with his. The molded between your lips and his was perfect, like they were meant to be kissing Harry’s. Your hold on him grew tighter as your tongues touched for the first time. It sent shivers down your spine and made the hairs on the back of your neck rise. 
It was a moment that would never leave your mind and you two would cherish it forever. 
It had been two weeks since the group arrived back to London from Paris. Two weeks since the best day of your life, and you and Harry were attached at the hip and at the heart. It had been so easy to be around him, and you couldn’t believe he was your boyfriend. Your boyfriend.
You’ve been falling for him ever since the day you went out with everyone for the first time and clung onto you like a koala. But you were glad to be that tree for him that night. 
The regular dates hadn’t stopped. You two acted the same around each other, and that was because of the friendship before the relationship. And you were able to hold his hand while walking down the street and kiss him against the wall of an alley.
It was the third month of school, and everyone was swamped in midterm studies. The amount of stress everyone had was enough for an entire school year because of how fast paced the program was. 
It neared eleven at night in the boys’ dorm. Everyone’s heads were in their books or typing on their laptop, papers scattered around them. For the art program, you had to visit various museums and look for a painting that defined the meaning of Impressionism art along with a 2,000 words that went along with the painting. 
Multiple yawns passed through the room, and everyone was exhausted. 
“Alright, I’m done for the night. Can’t do anymore studying,” Tanya said as she started packing her things up loosely. 
“Yeah, think we should call it a night,” Cade suggested. 
A series of ‘goodlucks’ and hugs went around the room as everyone packed their things up, and the girls went off to the dorm as you were still packing, wanting a minute alone with Harry. 
“Stay the night?” He had suggested, and you turned around and stopped fixing your things. 
“You want me to?” 
“Yeah. Think I’ll sleep better with you here and m’all stressed out.” 
“Okay,” you replied back, thinking that you would sleep better with him as well. 
As you two got into bed, Harry had played music on his phone, saying that it had helped him sleep and it was a habit when getting into bed. You noticed that you and Harry had the same love for Frank Sinatra as he hugged you to his chest. 
The two had laid there, not even closing your eyes to try and get some sleep. But rather, staring at the ceiling, running your hands up and down each other’s skin. 
And the moment you had leaned up to give him a kiss, you two couldn’t stop there. 
Hands that roamed your body had made that electrifying feeling stronger, pulling him in for more. The passionate kisses that you two traded had triggered each other’s arousal as he hovered over you. The pull and undressing of each other’s clothes while ‘Strangers in the Night’ played had left you wanting more and more of him. 
“I’ve never done this before. Like any of this,” you whispered. 
“Do you want to continue? We don’t have to if you don’t want to--I’m definitely fine with just kissin’ ya,” he said with a smile, causing you to beam at him being a gentleman. 
“Yes, want this so bad, baby.” You responded quickly, feeling very eager. He smiled in return and continued what he was doing.
He had asked you throughout the experience if you were okay with everything, and when you told him ‘yes please, give it to me’, he made sure he got you ready for him; rubbing your button and fingering you to your high, something you’ve never experienced with another person. 
It was the reassurance that Harry had given for your first time, and the constant questions of making sure if you were okay and if you were comfortable when he slowly pushed into you, trying to make sure he wasn’t being too hard with you because of his hard and big length. 
“So good for me,” he whispered out, kissing your lips. 
“Feels so good,” you had moaned out, never experiencing this type of feeling before. The pleasure had taken over the stinging feeling of your Harry entering you for the first time. You two were connected in a way you’ve never felt before. 
The soft whispers of praises that fell from your lips, and your arousal and orgasm prior that lubricated Harry’s thrusting, had made him feel so many things. He wanted to last for you, he didn't want this moment to end. Scratches in his hair and down his back had encouraged him to continue as you moaned his name in his ear, and he pressed wet kisses to your neck as he grabbed your breast. 
Two strangers in the night who had no idea of each other’s existence just three months ago. They had no clue of what their life was going to become when they met each other. It was the way you looked at each other that he knew you weren’t going to be just a stranger to him. Although he had a bit of alcohol in his system, he knew in his heart that he was going to find that sort of comfort and caring personality when he started talking to you. 
Harry continued to make love to you as the moonlight was seeping through the blinds, like the love that seeped through your veins for each other. He brought you both to your highs, and the only thing that was heard was the hushed moans and groans that came out of your mouths that could signify the love you have for one another.
It was that moment that changed everything. 
The fourth month had approached sooner than you would like. 
You and Harry hadn’t discussed what was going to happen when you had to leave, but you had hoped that you could make long distance work. 
The feelings you had for him were nothing you had ever felt before. It had made you cry out of happiness in random times, but also made you want to scream because of how too good to be true he is. 
He treated you like a queen. Making sure to give you as much love as you could handle, but sometimes a little more because he couldn’t hold it in. 
Throughout the weeks, you had learned so much about him and him, you. You didn’t think there was someone in the world that was so kind and caring; someone who shares similar passions and likes the same things you do. He was an angel sent from above, and you wanted to keep him for as long as possible. 
One night, you two shared your pasts together as you laid in bed together after a session of love making and a few rounds of hard fucking per your request. 
The fear you had inside of you was trickling down with your words when you had told him your insecurities and stories of your family that you wanted to forget. But he took everything so well; never looking at you for your insecurities, but only for your heart. 
“They weren’t very really supportive of me--of what I wanted to do. They just expected me to follow what they wanted, and I didn’t like that…” His hands roamed your skin innocently, comforting you and let you know he was there for you. “I was already miserable there. I didn’t want to be even more miserable doing something I hated. So I went against their demands and they said they weren’t going to pay for anything. But luckily I got a scholarship, and moved away from home.” 
“I’m proud of you for doing that.” You looked up at him as he continued. “It’s admirable to see you chase your dream and do what you want to do, despite being told by parents who don’t support you. You’re strong for that, y’know?” You hadn’t responded; just took in his words of support and comfort. You kissed his chest, leaving soft and wet kisses to his skin. 
It was like you couldn’t get enough of him. The magnetic pull that you had between you had grown, making the force stronger than ever, and you never wanted to leave his side. 
As the last few weeks of studying abroad we’re coming to an end, everyone was focused on finals. There weren’t that many dinners or nights out at that moment, but everyone had time since the people who lived outside of England had a week before they had to pack up and leave. 
One night as Harry was in your room, studying on the bed as you were writing a paper for your final project, he had suggested visiting his hometown. 
“Darling, I have a question,” he perked up. You looked at him and nodded for him to continue. “You could say no and that would be totally fine, but how about we go to my hometown this weekend? We could even study over there. It’s less noisy and it’s not a hussle and bussle kind of town. I just want you to be able to see where I grew up.” 
You smiled, “Sounds nice. Where are we going to stay?” 
“Figured we could stay at my mum’s? She’s got a great backyard, or we could explore and I could take you around,” he said with great hope. Your heart fluttered, Harry wanted you to see where he grew up. He wanted to show you every corner of his hometown. 
“Oh…at your mom’s. Is she going to be there?” The thought of meeting his mother had scared you. You had never met anyone’s parents, and it was the nagging thought in your head telling you that you were going to mess it up. 
“Yeah, but we could get a hotel or something-”
“No! I would love to stay there, and I would love to meet your mom.”
Harry smiled, giving you a kiss to your lips before grabbing his phone and texting his mother.
The train ride to Holmes Chapel was about two and a half hours. 
You suddenly had a fascination with trains as you felt like it kept you calm while you watched different towns and buildings pass by. 
With the speed of the train, it had felt like you were in slow motion. Your eyes tried taking in everything you saw, capturing every moment of what you want to remember. And Harry is in a lot of those images. 
Holmes Chapel was very welcoming and warm. Despite the weather, it was warm. It felt like home. It was a small town and everyone seemed to know the next person, but you loved every part of it because it was where Harry grew up. 
His childhood home was even lovelier. Maybe it was because of the fact that Anne lived there and Harry grew up there, but she was ever so sweet and welcomed you in with open arms. 
She had taken a liking to you immediately, telling you childhood stories of Harry and his sister, Gemma, that only family knew. Harry was ultimately surprised at how quickly Anne opened up to you. He knew his mother was kind, but she kept to herself and didn’t speak when she was uncomfortable, so to see his mother laughing loudly with his also somewhat shy girlfriend, made his heart burst with love. 
Harry had watched them sit at the dining table, sharing stories as he leaned against the kitchen counter as he wore a robe to keep him warm while smiling so big that his jaw physically started to hurt. 
He’d never had felt so loved and had never loved anything like he does with you. It surprised him how fast he fell for you, but it was quite possibly the easiest thing he did. There was no judgement in the relationship. You had kept him grounded and helped him when he was going through a rut when writing. 
The only thing that was bad about the relationship was the distance that will be put between you two when you leave to go back home. He didn’t want this to become a fling, to have a time limit. He knew exactly what he was getting into the day he asked you to be his, and he didn’t want to let go of you. 
And he truly hoped you felt the same. 
Just after you and Harry were back in London after visiting Anne and his hometown, finals had approached rather quickly. You had had a great time spending a little time with his mother, and you think she liked you very much. There were countless conversations and laughs that you will never forget. 
“Can I ask you something sweetheart?” Anne asked. 
“Of course,” you said, and you had been nervous as to what she was going to ask. 
“You mentioned that you were leaving just before the holiday, but I just wanted to ask where that leaves you and Harry. Are you two still going to be together?” A frown had made an appearance on her face, resembling your own. 
“I would like to. We haven’t spoken about it, but I’m sure that conversation will happen soon,” you had answered honestly.
“You still would still want to be with him?” You nodded in response. “That’s great to know. I like you a lot, and Harry has taken quite the liking towards you as well, but I just didn’t know if it was some sort of abroad type of relationship; someone to just keep you company in a new country-”
“No, it’s nothing like that! I know it’s only been almost two months of our relationship, but I love him, and I would never let him go. I didn’t want to study abroad to have a relationship, but he stumbled into my life so unexpectedly and I don’t have plans of letting that kind of love go.” 
Everything you had said was the whole truth. You weren’t expecting a relationship to come out of this, but you’re so immensely happy that it did because Harry walked into your life. Although you hadn’t known him for a very long time, quality overruled quantity. The connection you two had made within the few months meant something deeper than a fling. 
Anne smiled and nodded, like she was appreciating you and her respect for you had increased. The topic was over, and it was onto the next that was followed by laughs. And that entire time you stayed at her house, Anne knew exactly why Harry had fallen in love with you. 
The last week of being in London had come very quickly, and sadness was an understatement. 
The people who were leaving had decided to start packing the things that they didn’t need and weren’t going to use anymore, so they had extra time to spend and go out with everyone because packing your things for four months plus the things you bought wasn’t all that fun. 
It was Monday morning after finals when you had heard your phone buzz on your bedside table. You had groaned as it felt like you had slept for only 30 minutes. You debated on whether to check it in your sleepy state. The buzzing had stopped, making your thoughts turn off, but started back up once again and you figured you should check it. 
Harry was calling you in the early hours of the morning. It was 6 a.m and if it were anyone else, you would ignore it. 
“Harry? What’s wrong? Are you okay?” You had mumbled once you answered the phone. Harry chuckled, but also fell deeper in love as you were just as caring as you were awake. 
“Darling, m’fine! M’actually outside of your dorm. I didn’t want to knock and wake everyone else up, but get up. We’re going on an adventure,” he said in a hushed voice, and you practically heard his smile through the phone. 
“Harry…” your eyes were still closed, exhausted from your slumber. 
“Please, baby. You won’t regret it.” 
And you didn’t. You never regretted anything when it came to Harry. 
You had gotten up and dressed warm enough for your adventure, and met Harry outside to which he rewarded you with a hug and kiss, thanking you for putting up with him. 
You both got in Peter’s car that Harry had begged him to take for a little bit, and luckily he agreed because the tube wasn’t running at that time. With Harry’s arm in your lap, you leaned on his arm as you closed your eyes until he took you both to your destination.
It was still a bit dark out, but it was way past the starry night it was a few hours ago. The sun was just about ready to rise, and the early bird got the worm. 
Harry had held your hand as he led you both up to top of the Primrose Hill, showing the beautiful London city. It had taken you both a while to get to the top, due to you being extremely sleepy still and sluggishly holding you both back. Harry had set a blanket down for you two to sit on, and you immediately snuggled into him. 
“Don’t fall asleep on me, darling. We have a sunrise to watch,” he said, leaning his head down and caressing your face. 
“Mmm. Tired,” you grumbled. 
“Please? It’s your last week here,” he said sadly, and you wished you hadn’t complained that you were tired because hearing his tone had almost broke your heart. But that woke you up slightly, realizing that you didn’t want to miss another moment with him. 
The sky had gotten a little lighter, and Harry checked his phone for the time, about 30 minutes till the sun started to rise. 
“Tell me something,” he said. It had been a thing you two did when you started hanging out. It was sort of a confession time; either can say anything you want to say and the other will listen. 
“I’m going to miss you so much that the thought of us not being physically next to each other will hurt so bad,” you confessed. 
“I’m going to miss you too.” 
“Baby, you don’t understand. My heart will completely break once I part ways with you at the airport. I cant handle it, Harry,” your body had completely faced his, and he noticed your eyes were swollen from the lack of sleep and the incoming tears. 
“Hey, I know exactly how you feel. You’re not the only one who gets to feel like that,” he said more seriously. “But we’re gonna get through this, okay? We’ll do everything to make sure we make it together,” he had placed a hand on your cheek. 
“You want this right?” Your insecurities had gotten in the way and you needed reassurance from him, and Harry knew that and didn’t ever complain to give it to you. 
“Of course, baby. Never gave you a reason telling you I didn’t want this, right?” You shook your head, tears had made its way down your face, and Harry had shared the same tears as you. “Then don’t worry. Everything’s going to be fine. I’ll make sure of it.” Harry held you to his chest and you both cried in each other’s arms. 
The sunrise was as beautiful as ever that morning, screaming for a new beginning as the sun illuminated the sky into an orange and yellow glow. The new beginning was right in your arms as you held him tighter while tears fell down both of your faces, feeling powerful and stronger together as you two poured every emotion and energy into each other. 
Harry was your sunrise and your sunset. 
You wanted to spend the beginning of every morning with him and have him be the last thing you see before you are pulled into a deep slumber, dreaming of him for hours until you see his face again and make him your reality. 
And you both were going to make it. 
The ride to the airport was long and filled with silence as words weren’t needed at that time; only the hurt because of the love that was so strong that nothing could come between you two. Not even distance. 
You already missed the whole group dearly, and the last dinner with everyone was bittersweet. It was an emotional one as everyone talked about their favorite times and laughed at memories of drunken stories. And at the end, everyone raised a glass. 
“To the best group of friends out there.” 
“To a talented ass group of artists and writers.” 
“To love, laughter, and the pub.” 
“To new beginnings, but never endings.” 
Everyone cried and hugged each other, making the moment last forever, but it was definitely not the last time. 
You slowly walked with Harry, hand in hand as he rolled your luggage, to the area where you both had to part your ways. He had kissed your hand and head multiple times until you stood facing in front of him. 
The embrace you two shared was the most gut wrenching feeling you had ever felt in your life, and it felt like your heart was physically breaking along with Harry’s. 
Your hearts had always been in sync, beating as fast as the other or filling in beats for one another when one of your hearts had skipped a beat. Being without one another would feel like a missing beat in your hearts, and you needed the other to fulfill it.
“This is not goodbye. It’s never going to be goodbye with you, okay?” Harry’s voice croaked and you nodded, too afraid to speak as tears spilled out of your eyes. 
You were breathing deeply, knowing you should go through TSA already as you both were trying to spend every last minute together. 
“Tell me something?” Harry had asked one last time in person. You thought hard about it, wanting to make it the best one he’s ever heard. 
“I love you, baby.” 
He gave you a small and sad smile as more tears formed in his eyes, “I love you too. So much, darling.” 
And then you were off.
Harry had watched you walk away until he couldn’t see you anymore before he had sulked back to his dorm, crying all the way back. He felt empty without you beside him. With spending everyday with each other for the past four months, it had felt like a punch to his chest when you had left. 
When he had gotten back to his room, he noticed a large square board wrapped in festive wrapping paper with an envelope attached to it. 
‘To my lovely Harry, 
Thank you for loving with me, laughing with me, and living with me. You’re the best person I’ve ever come to know, so I hope you enjoy this piece that was dedicated to you (and our group of friends). I’m so grateful you’re the person who has my heart.
I love you and miss you so much. 
Yours forever.
The tears hadn’t stopped since he saw you leave, and they kept on coming as he opened his present.
Sitting in his hands was your final project along with your paper. It was a painting of his hand holding a heart as blood dripped from it. He noticed it was his hand because of the various rings he wore. The London Eye, Big Ben, the Eiffel Tower, and the pub were at the aorta as a plane curved from around the heart. The background was painted as an orange and yellow color, symbolizing the sunset. 
Harry sobbed and hugged your painting to his chest, feeling as if it’s the last thing he has of you for a while. He picked up your paper and read the title. 
‘The Power of Being Vulnerable’ 
⋇⋆✦⋆⋇
And so you were sat on a floral blanket, two years later; setting up your lunch, and taking out your sketchbook along with your supplies. You had brought your painting easel, in case it wasn’t going to rain, and you’re glad that you brought it because the weather was just gorgeous enough to paint outside for a while.
Before you went to the park, you had time to make a quick and small charcuterie board that was filled with Brie, prosciutto, crackers, and honey; a snack that would take up your time under the warm sun. 
You started sketching your drawing until you felt a familiar pair of lips against your cheek behind you. 
“Hi, darling,” his raspy voice that had brought you immediate peace said in your ear. You turned your head, and saw the beautiful smile beaming down at you before sitting down and meeting you at eye level, giving you a kiss to your lips. 
“Hi, baby.” 
“Sorry I’m late, quite the line at the sandwich shop, but I got your favorite as always.” You smiled after him, thanking him for waiting in that line and for the food. 
“It’s okay, practically just sat down a few minutes ago, and set everything up.” 
“Okay, good. By the way, you look absolutely beautiful,” he took off his sunglasses to give him a more clear look. You were wearing a dress that complimented your skin tone, making your eyes enticing that he couldn’t help but fall more in love.
“Thank you, my love. You look so handsome,” you complimented back, leaning in to peck his lips. Harry was wearing a plaid button down flannel, black jeans, boots, and a fedora. His hair has grown much longer over the past few years, and you honestly love it. One day, you had told him that he looks like a prince to which you earned a blush. 
“Gonna paint, my darling?” 
“Yeah. Nice weather out today, so definitely going to.” 
“Can’t wait you see what you put together,” Harry smiles, making the dimples that you love so much, pop out. 
You and Harry spent the rest of the day together before it was time to head to dinner with the six other people that had changed your life. It was something simple like sitting on top of the same hill you were at two years ago that made your heart flutter. With his head in your lap as he read a book, occasionally stopping to scratch his head and give him a kiss to his forehead, and you sitting upright painting away as he fed you crackers and cheese, you would have never known this is how your life would turn out. 
You were extremely grateful for the years you were given to be with Harry and your group of friends that you love so dearly. You were a shy girl, scared of being scared, hardly opened up to anyone. 
But that same shy girl blossomed. She blossomed into a beautiful woman who was being praised and treated like the way she should. The man beside her had reminded her every single day that she is a stunning and caring person that deserves the world and more. She eventually started to believe it herself. She began to start seeing herself that way. She woke up and looked in the mirror and started to remind herself that she was beautiful and that she was going to take over the world. 
The affirmations had come from opening herself up to people who genuinely cared about her. Because being vulnerable isn’t bad whatsoever. 
It allowed you to let go of whatever pain there was inside your heart and leaned onto someone so they could hold your pain as well because you finally weren’t alone. You finally had people who loved you and needed you. 
You had opened your heart up all those years ago, and it led you to the best thing that’s ever happened to you. 
With two years of loving each other and two years of long distance, you had opened up your heart to the most special man in the world. The constant tears of missing each other from the other side of the world. The need to feel his touch. The tiring plane rides every four months to visit him, until it was his turn to visit you. The care packages. The long FaceTime chats. They all led to the best hugs when you reunited with Harry. 
You would travel the world and back if it meant Harry was your destination. 
And it was where the world took you that led to your forever. 
feedback is appreciated here! <3 also i would love to take blurbs for this and write more about them, so please let me know what you like to read!
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amourology · 2 years
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Hey there love
Please don't treat this situation as a little bump or something like that, I mean is your future we're talking about
Sure, it's a given that college is everything but easy, there are sacrifices, obstacles in the way, and the system itself, plus the people that are supposed to guide you are not exactly helpful or fair all the time. It can be a living hell, and it's something we gotta prepare ourselves for when we think about getting a degree
Still, what's more important here, is the part where you feel like it is worthy, even after all that stress and straight up agony you may feel in the way. If you're motivated enough to think "yeah, I guess the outcome is what will actually count in the end for me" then there's a reason to keep pushing
But if that's not the case, and you just keep thinking that there's something wrong with that path, then you're in all the liberty to take a step back and really think about your next move, whether it is to keep going, or prioritize your health and well being in another way.
Please keep in mind that your happiness should always be the number one priority here, and because of that, you don't even have to apologize for being inactive, please take care of yourself first, think about your future, and remember that no matter what you choose to do, we'll be here for you to talk with <3
hi lovely, i cant put into words how much i appreciate this message. i’ve really been struggling with this decision and haven’t really talked about it with anyone except for my mom. my mom didn’t finish her first degree choice either, and our family heavily judged her for it. its part of the reason why im so scared of making the same choice bc i know they’ll be absolute assholes about it :/
but idk i kind of…i dont know if its worth it? i’ve always been interested in the criminal mind and how it works and why they do the things they do and how i could perhaps help them get rid off such things/urges. turns out, that field is forensic psychology instead of criminology. really wished they’d told me that at the info event but hey, i could’ve dug deeper myself too.
so i started looking; are there any masters at my uni in this field? good news is, there is! im, however, not allowed to apply with a criminology bachelor. so i called a bunch of people, asking them if there’s a way i can apply regardless (perhaps even taking a couple of extra classes) but the answer stayed no, i cant apply.
so it kinda feels like the only option for me (if i really want to do what i’ve always set out to do) is dropping out & applying for the bachelor psychology in 2023. the application deadline for this year passed already, unfortunately, which means id have to take a gap year
who knows maybe it’ll help my mental health lmao — but yea idk im just kind of stuck, like deep-down i feel like i know what to do. im just scared to do it bc of my family and bc it’ll feel like i wasted two years of my life on this degree :/
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parcoeurs · 3 years
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Extremely fascinated by your wag AU tag 👀.
thanks bestie so am i.
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okay lmao so this isn't an actual fic that'll ever be written but. i was talking to my friend about it who still hasn't finished dts season 3 unfortunately but it means that i've switched around ages and years etc. i promise this has the potential to be a fun and sexy time but there's just s o much background shit that needs to be discussed. tw for mentions of irl deaths etc:
but pierre & charles meeting when they're 5-6 (which is what i think charles actually says irl but someone said it might've been closer to when they were 10-11? regardless.) and charles' dad passes away when they're 9-10, and jules when they're 13-14 and charles quits racing then. (fyi i know that irl jules passed away first)
he thinks about quitting when his dad passes away but keeps going with help from jules. so when the accident etc happens, it's not even like an active decision he ponders. he just knows there's no way he'll race again.
and pierre's been with him throughout everything, his best friend who he can talk to when he can't bear looking at his own family. so he doesn't understand when pierre tells him he's going to keep racing. when charles had told him he was never going to get into a kart ever again, pierre had nodded, grabbed his hand and squeezed it tight. important to note that they're barely teenagers rn so yes charles feels betrayed that pierre isn't feeling the same things he is and isn't choosing the same future for himself etc.
they have a huge fight, lots of crying, lots of dramatic teenage angst. but it ultimately ends with charles shutting pierre out of his life. which is easier said than done when it's your best friend whose family is super close with yours. but it works because pierre is off racing around the world and charles has done all he can to never have to think about that stuff.
so charles goes to school, is doing uni somewhere in europe. studies something generic like business or maybe if i'm feeling suuuuper indulgent i will have him major in environmental studies like moi <3 pointedly does not come to monaco during grand prix weekend or the week before or the week after.
and then anthoine passes away too. (they're 20-21 now)
they see each other again at the funeral but don't talk, they meet up afterwards. pierre breaking down in charles' arms, clutching at his back, telling him he was right. pierre should've quit, he can't do this anymore either. they haven't said a word to each other in 7 years but charles still knows pierre, and knows that this isn't actually what pierre wants. or what he should do. (charles vaguely knows pierre's in f1 but doesn't know he's with redbull, doesn't know redbull's the top team etc)
"you can still do this, you will," charles tells him.
"not without you again."
so then comes the challenge of mending their relationship while still working through the shared trauma, and the Layers of past trauma. and also just the general awkwardness that comes with a friendship breakup/makeup situation you know! they can't just act like nothing happened but would it be easier that way?
they start texting first, then they play fifa or cod together. (sometimes pierre's british friend lewis joins too.)
slowly slowly slowly, they become friends again and then inseparable too. maybe even closer than they were before and charles only now realizes how much he missed pierre. while pierre still can't believe he has charles back now, it's as good as he let himself imagine.
the part i'm unsure about is if i would want pierre's career trajectory to be the same or not. because i think the demotion adds SUCH a painful but interesting aspect to his ~storyline. but ultimately i think maybe he just doesn't get the second seat immediately. spends more years with toro rosso/alpha tauri before getting "called up" (sorry i have no idea what the proper terminology is haha ignore the nba/nhl terms).
he invites charles to his first race in the red bull and charles says no. immediately. pierre's quiet on the other side of the phone, internally thinking he messed this up somehow. he thought things were going well and he takes this as charles doesn't want to see him. but he knows there's a lot more that's stopping charles and he also knows charles will definitely pull back if pierre asks about the other stuff. so he moves right along, asking charles about school, the weather, and tries not to let it show in his voice that he misses his best friend and needs him too.
"i'm going to try to watch," charles says, after pierre's yawned goodnight through the phone and is waiting for him to hang up. because you know pierre's not going to hang up first.
"what?"
"the race. i'm going to try. goodnight!" mentally charles slams the phone shut but really he just smashes at the red button before shoving it under his bed and looking at his hands trying to get answers for what he just did.
his only relief is that he didn't promise pierre he would watch, just that he would try. couldn't even choke out a, "good luck." (insert long paragraph about charles letting pierre down or thinking he has).
he only watches qualifying. pierre p3. already knows on saturday that there's no way he can watch the actual race.
but on sunday when he's supposed to be going over his notes for his climate change science & policy course (yes.... i did it...) he finds himself with his heart in his mouth refreshing formula1 dot com. watches the random names move up and down while keeping his eyes on 10 - gasly. (starts shaking for a second when he sees pierre's name drop until the IN PIT sign comes up across his name. fellas the thing about triggers is-- anyways.)
the scariest part is that by the time he's scrolled through all of red bull's socials to look at pictures of pierre on the podium (he finished p2 sorry i know this truly does not matter), he's forgotten about the race. the anxiety sits small in the back of his throat, his happiness for pierre is bright and loud in front of him. charles sends him a message, asking him to call whenever he can and adds a blue & red heart emoji which feels like a Big Step. but basically pierre calls and acts like nothing has happened since the last time they talked. mentions the breakfast he had in detail as if he didn’t get a podium in his first race with red bull. finally with a big team. but charles embarrassingly realizes that maybe his text didn't exactly imply in literally any way whatsoever that he knows the results of the race and was trying to congratulate pierre with this call. charles probably feels so embarrassed at this point but somehow still can't manage to say anything about the race until the next day maybe.
maybe texts pierre, good job. or, you were great. or something about him and not the race. or maybe reposts a picture from red bull but not one of pierre in his car, pointedly. only one of him on the podium. and pierre probably reposts it with the squid emoji and/or my favourite sentence in the world, merci petit calamaro.
charles cries when he reads it.
not to be lazy now but [insert 10k words of them building their friendship. meeting up in monaco with both of their families. meeting in milan or london or paris idk where pierre would live. but he flies charles out. not on a private jet because charles flat out refused lol. not because he's an environmentally conscious king he's just too, embarrassed? overwhelmed? by pierre doing Things Like That for him. even though he wants it lol. like when he graduates he's soooo annoyed that pierre couldn't come celebrate immediately because it was race week. but when he comes home his apartment is filled with flowers (roses, his favourite) and balloons and a giant teddy bear as tall as charles. and he DOES post 12 instagram stories to go with the other 30 from his other friends congratulating him. so yeah charles goes through a lot of personal growth and therapy. to the point where he's watching pierre race again, and waiting for him to invite him to a race again!!! do not even think about actual dates i'm fucking begging you but the one he goes to is monza :))))]
ultimately charles' path to understand/accepting/moving on from, his trauma, happens once he has pierre back in his life. it's also encouraged by pierre, but it's also not entirely because of him. not sure how to word that but yeah. these things are happening at the same time but charles still has to go through them by himself.
pierre takes him on romantic dates all around the world and charles doesn't realize that's what they are. fully in his bestie vibes only mood while pining for pierre in a way he doesn't even quite understand. almost a self deprecating, jeez whoever gets to date pierre is going to be so lucky :/
fanpage on ig: met pierre's alleged bf he's so pretty and sweet, i complimented his shoes and he was so nice. charles reading that: i didnt know he was dating someone :( why wouldn't he tell me :( well at least someone complimented my shoes today :(
pierre doesn't necessarily think they're dating, but he does know charles doesn't quite realize what they're doing so he's just waiting for him to come to terms with it.
not to give this au 10 different subplots but yeah that miscommunication plot becomes our prize for surviving through the first part of this.
but yeah at the last race of the year, that pierre wins because i said so? charles finds him before he goes on to the podium, kisses his helmet. says i love you, i'm so proud of you.
THEN, finally, charles does become pierre's wag. we made it kids. we did it joe.
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honeybunches-writes · 4 years
Text
I'm honestly on a roll with writing right now, so I'm posting this one before my motivation runs out! 😅
I've always loved AUs where Jon met Gerry when he was still working in research, so I wrote one!
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Jon is walking up the large stone steps of the Institute, bulging messenger bag slung over his shoulder, and arms full of the books that he couldn't fit. As he nears the top step, he hears a loud rumbling from the street behind him, and he turns to see a vintage motorcycle pull up to the curb.
The rider swings one ripped-jean clad leg wide over the bike and pops the kickstand down. They stride up the steps toward Jon, taking them two at a time. The sleek black helmet still obscuring their features.
"E-excuse me," Jon stammers, motioning to grab the taller figure's arm as he walks past, "can I help you? Are you here to give a statement?"
A low chuckle comes from under the tinted visor, before the biker reaches up to remove the helmet. He pulls the heavy thing free of his head, and shakes out his long black hair. He runs a hand through it to tame some of the more unruly hairs.
Now that Jon can see the man, he's certain that he doesn't work here. Dark makeup is smudged around bright blue eyes, and he has two twin piercing on his lower lip, which is painted a similar shade of black to his eyelids.
The taller man has to look down to meet Jon's eyes, and he can't help but laugh louder at the look of indignation on his face. Eyes hard set on him, but brow knit in confusion.
"What's so funny?" The smaller man asks, a bit more irritation filtering into his tone.
"I'm Gerry," the leather clad man says coolly, taking a step toward Jon, and Jon quickly takes a step back, shrinking into himself, so Gerry steps back again, choosing to instead extend his hand, "I'm here to see Gertrude."
"R-right, well, I can show you down to the Archives."
"No need. I know my way around pretty well," the man, Gerry, says with a quick wink, opening the heavy oak doors with a flourish, and stepping inside, leaving Jon to stare after him as the door closes.
A few weeks pass before Jon sees Gerry again, walking the halls toward the Archives. Jon catches up with him quickly, matching his steps as he comes up beside him.
Jon looks the tall goth up and down. He's wearing similar makeup to the first time they met, but today half of his hair is in a low ponytail, with some loose strands hanging on the side of his face. Jon's gaze moves lower to the plain black tee hugging his torso, the sleeves just a bit too tight on his upper arms. He wonders if Gerry works out.
Would I even weigh anything to him? Jon begins to wonder at scenarios where Gerry may have to carry him.
"Can I help you?" Gerry asks, pierced brow quirking up.
Jon's face turns a bright shade of pink as the man's voice brings that particular train of thought to a screaming halt, "w-what?"
"Well, I just figured since you rushed to catch up to me, you needed me for something," the corner of Gerry's mouth pulls up as his voice takes on a teasing tone, "or did you just plan on undressing me with your eyes?"
Jon turns wide eyes up to meet Gerry's, face flushing all the way to the tips of his ears, "No! I was already coming this way to deliver this file to Ms. Robinson! It had nothing to do with you!"
"Good," Gerry reaches over Jon's head and pushes the Archive door open, "after you?"
Jon just stares numbly up at Gerry, brain still trying to catch up to what Gerry had said. Was he really staring that hard? Wait. Was he doing it again? Stop staring, idiot!
Jon tucks his chin into his chest and ducks under the taller man's arm, walking into the room and making a beeline straight to the head archivist's office.
Gerry is leaning against another assistant's desk when Jon steps back into the larger room.
"Hey!"
Jon turns on his heel a pins Gerry with his meanest face, "what?"
Gerry lifts his hands as in surrender and pushes himself off the desk, stepping toward Jon like a deer he might spook, "well, I was just heading out to grab lunch from the cafe down the street and wanted to know if you'd like to join me? Since you seem so enthralled with me," he finishes with a cheeky wink.
Jon just stands stunned, clutching the newest files he'd been given to his chest. He makes a big show of thinking the offer over, turning his eyes up toward the ceiling and tapping his foot. And it must be a pretty good performance, because the assistant whose desk Gerry had commandeered is snickering.
"Oh, I suppose if you want my company so badly, I could be bothered for a few moments," Jon says in his most dramatic, put-out voice.
Gerry's smile is so bright that Jon has to look anywhere but his face.
A few moments later, they're both standing out on the front sidewalk. Jon is just staring wide eyed at the helmet being offered to him.
"Ooooh, no! There is no way you're getting me on that thing!" Jon yells, taking a step away from the rumbling machine in front of him.
"I'll take it easy with you, I promise," Gerry says, still holding the helmet out to the smaller man, but shaking it a little.
"I don't care! Do you know the statistics of injuries from those death machines? I'll walk and meet you there, thank you very much!" Jon turns his nose up and begins marching down the sidewalk.
Gerry shuts the bike off and puts the helmet back in its storage box, jogging to catch up to him. Once he catches up with him, he gives him a quick tap on the shoulder.
Jon stops and rounds on him, "yes?"
"It's, uh, it's this way." Gerry points his thumb over his shoulder in the opposite direction.
"Fine, lead the way." Jon says curtly, motioning with his hand.
Jon spends more time paying attention to the man across from him than the sandwich he had ordered.
The way his eyes sparkle when he starts to talk about whatever project him and Gertrude are undertaking.
The way he worries his lip ring with his teeth and apologizes when he thinks he's gotten too excited.
The eyes tattooed on each of his joints, from his fingers all the way up to the one sitting squarely in the middle of his throat. He wonders if there are more, and where they would be.
When Jon looks up again, Gerry is chewing at the hoop on the right side of his lip, "sorry, am I boring you?"
Jon's eyes widen and his cheeks flush, "no! No! I was just, um, looking at your tattoos."
"You like them? Did most of them myself!" Gerry says, and there's that beaming smile again, but this time Jon doesn't look away, he just smiles brightly back.
They spend the rest of their time in easy conversation before Gerry snatches the check and heads toward the counter.
Jon huffs and follows him out the door, "I could've gotten my own food!"
"I know, but I didn't want you to. I always pay on the first date."
Jon stops dead and stares at Gerry's back, "was this a date?"
Gerry stops and turns to look over his shoulder, soft blue eyes scanning the smaller man's face, "I would like it to be."
"Oh. Okay," Jon says quietly, picking up his pace and coming to stand next to the taller goth, "then I guess this is the part where we hold hands?"
"Only if you want it to be."
Jon reaches out, tentatively brushing their knuckles before lacing their fingers together. He shoots Gerry a timid smile before starting back down the sidewalk.
They quickly fall into an easy routine. Either Jon will come down to the Archives or Gerry will come to research and they'll head down to the cafe for lunch. Every time Gerry tries to convince him to get on the bike, and every time Jon vehemently refuses. So they walk, hand in hand down the street.
After a few weeks of this, Jon steps into the archives early one morning. He scans the room before realizing that Gerry isn't there.
"Um. Um, excuse me," Jon says, trying to draw the attention of the assistant at the desk in front of him.
Without looking up, the guy just hooks a thumb over his shoulder at Gertrude's office door.
"Alright. I'll just wait here, I guess." Jon whispers to himself, sitting in a small folding chair by the door.
His attention is pulled from the book in his lap at the sound of the door opening, and Gerry calling his name.
"Gerry, hi!"
"What are you doing here? Lunch isn't for another hour?"
"Well, I needed to go to the shops, and it's quite a long walk," Jon says looking down at the closed book in his lap.
"Right, well, I could use the fresh air." Gerry stretches and grabs his jacket off the hook, and heads out the door.
"Did you grab your keys?" Jon asks as they near the large oak doors that lead out to the street.
"I always have my keys, but why? I thought we were walking?"
"It's a pretty long walk to the bookshop I need to go to, so I thought maybe we could, um, take the bike?"
Gerry's eyes light up as he digs his keys out of his jacket pocket, "really?"
Jon just gives a short nod and holds out his hand for the helmet. Gerry grabs it off the back of the seat and puts it on Jon's head. He puts the key in and kicks the bike to life. Jon can feel the rumbling in his chest as he takes a small step closer.
Gerry is already straddling the motorcycle, and he pats the seat behind him. Jon swings his leg over and slides on right behind him.
Leaning his head onto Gerry's shoulder he yells over the roar of the engine, "wait! Where's your helmet?"
"You're wearing it," Gerry yells back. He kicks the stand up into place and gets balanced, "don't worry, I'll take it slow for you!"
The bike jerks into gear and roars away from the curb.
Jon's mind is racing with all of those chain emails he used to get in uni. The guy who gives his helmet to his girlfriend to save her after he learns the brakes fail. The gory details after they slam into a tree or wall or parked car. It's not until Gerry places a hand over his own that he realizes he's been white knuckling the other man's jacket.
Gerry turns his head so his voice can be heard over the wind, "hey! You can relax! You're in good hands! Just sit back and enjoy the ride!"
Jon takes a few deep breaths and picks his head up from where he'd had it hidden in Gerry's back.
The sidewalk next to them is a blur, and he can feel the wind pulling at his sweater. He sits up a bit straighter and feels the vibrations from the motor running up his legs into his chest. He reaches up to push the visor up so he can feel the wind on his face, and suddenly it all makes sense.
This must be that feeling that everyone always talks about. He never believed them when they said it felt like flying, but this, this is exhilarating. His arms loosen around Gerry's waist, and he throws his head back.
Gerry can feel Jon's chest shaking with laughter as he leans back as far as he can, and that's his cue to turn the bike onto a side street. He wants to draw that joy out as long as he can, so he takes the scenic route.
Once the laughing fit has passed, he sighs and leans his full body into Gerry's back, tightening his hold. This grip isn't from fear, and as Gerry laces one of his hands with Jon's, he feels a warmth spreading through his chest that pulls his lips up into a soft smile.
Gerry brings the bike to a slow stop on the curb in front of the bookshop, and leans it onto the stand. He swings his leg up and over the tank, and offers his hand to Jon.
Jon swings his leg over the bike, but stumbles as he tries to get his legs to remember how to hold his weight.
Gerry catches him by his upper arms as he nearly crashes right into his chest, "don't worry, that happens to everyone their first time."
Jon holds onto Gerry's arm as he wanders around the bookshop, grabbing the few books he came in for. Gerry takes them from him once he's paid and starts out of the shop. He sets the books carefully into the saddlebag on the back and straddles the bike once more.
Jon slides right behind him like he was meant to be there his whole life, and pulls the helmet down onto his head.
Gerry puts the bike in gear and their off again, Jon pressing himself into Gerry's back and watching as the world blurs around them.
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