#...ESPECIALLY if you're also being exploited (even if just a bit)...

[uncanny-tranny]

The leftism/anticapitalism leaving people's bodies the zeptosecond you imply that disabled people who aren't "productive" still matter in society and need to be treated like intrinsic equals who have a place in this world:

[contentloadingandstuff]

Yae Miko x Ganyu-like!Male!Kitsune!Reader

CW: None. Pure fluff.

For Miko, there's nothing cuter than you in the entire world. 

Kitsune tend to be confident, slightly malicious and crafty by nature, yet there you are. A complete opposite of her, and the traditional traits of the Kitsune race as a whole. 

But Miko? She is all for it. 

You’re quite the shy person, making you especially vulnerable to teasing. Even a slight remark sent your way is able to knock you off balance, leaving you flustered and blushy. Your occasional attempts at turning the tables usually end with Miko being able to effortlessly steer the conversation in her favor, and use your teasing attempts against you. 

Words are one thing, but physical contact? Sometimes Miko is genuinely worried you will melt or set on fire after she does something as ordinary as holding your hand or tracing her fingers along your back or neck areas. Maybe this timidness of yours, cute as it is, has some downsides? Luckily for you, Miko doesn’t exploit your weak spot to keep you a constant flustered mess. It’s not like she has the heart to. 

Why? Because you work so, so much. How can you do nine or ten hour shifts on a regular, weekly basis? And spend all this time slouching over paperwork too? For Miko, two forms to fill is a personal tragedy, but you seem to be able to handle whole mountains of documents with unshaken resolve. A truly fascinating creature you are. 

She doesn’t like the overtime you constantly take on, however. The core of the issue isn’t that you’re a pushover - though Miko is genuinely worried that your lack of confidence will get you in trouble some day - but that your work ethic, admirable as it is, stands as fairly rigid and harmful to yourself. Miko tries her best to convince you to change - she tries to reason with you, bribe you with extra affection or threaten you with being grumpy if you don't come home when you should. Sometimes it works, most times it doesn't. Luckily, being close friends with Ei has benefits - a few right words whispered into her ear will land you some much needed leave. 

When you finally return home, so adorably spent and sleepy, Miko won't spoil the daylights out of you. No - she will spoil not only the daylights, but also nightlights, dawnlights and dusklights. You will always be greeted with a warm meal and a warm bath. As your wife, it's her duty to care for you and reward all your efforts, no? Her skittish little husband brings out quite a motherly side of her out into the light. And rightfully so - you deserve more than the entire world. 

Once you’re full and relaxed, Miko’s going to cuddle you right to sleep. She’ll gladly let you rest your cute, weary face on her lap or her belly. As you drift off, Miko will play with your hair and ramble about whatever comes to her mind in a whispered tone, marveling at how peaceful your sleeping features are. 

While certainly not the typical Kitsune, you're certainly a fine specimen. Big, fluffy ears, beautiful tails and an even more cuddly fox form make you all the more precious (and handsome) in her eyes. But you don't seem to share her opinion. You are always noticeably shy when somebody mentions your unique features, even more so than usual. It's all about standing out, you try to tell her, but she always silences you with a kiss. Miko will always tell you that your ears are a point of pride and a source of respect for you, not a stigma. The respectful interest in your person doesn't seem to convince you of the benefits of being a fox envoy, so maybe her attention will, hm? Expect a lot of care directed at your special features. Miko will not only caress them, but also groom them. Such beautiful fur needs proper maintenence, and it's her privilage to indulge you.

You’re a bit more vertically challenged than her, but she doesn’t mind. Not at all. Your compact size makes you much easier to handle, and - aside from the obvious teasing opportunities - give her just the right tool to take care of your health. Finished work, but you want to do some at home? Nope. She’s going to grab you and carry you away to bed where she will cuddle all your senseless overworking impulses out of you. You say you need to work on a weekend? Good luck trying to get out of her iron grip and the deathold of her five fluffy tails in the morning. Miko is far stronger than she looks!

Unlike her, You’re quite innocent. While her idea of spending the evening after a nice date is, shall we say, a bit “for adults only”, you? Battleships, cookies and hot cocoa - that is what’s on your mind. Sometimes, Miko can’t help but chuckle at you and shake her head in disbelief. How can you be so cute so effortlessly? 

Your natural gentleness is very adorable. Miko can’t recall a time when you were raising your voice, aside from the one time when she took you on a date to the Test Of Courage. It was your idea initially - maybe you wanted to impress her by showing your bravery? She’s not sure. At first, Miko was quite amused at how anxious you were, but as soon as she realized just how tightly you held on to her, she got you out of there. Aside from lots of cuddles and kisses to calm your heart, you got a stern yet gentle lecture. 

Miko loves you as is, and there’s nothing she would ever change about you. 

Thanks for reading!

[lovelylivewirez]

Figured I should post this on it's own since @au-sonic-smackdown has already begun (but I kept forgetting so... a few days later it is lmao)

I'll take this as a chance to ramble a little about this AU as well- putting under the cut tho bc it's gonna get a bit long and is probably a bit disjointed lol

So Sonic in this AU is immortal, right? He's like a demigod kinda. But so are Shadow and Tails (Shadow being the Ultimate Lifeform and Tails being a kitsune). They live far into the future, long enough to meet Silver as a child and see him grow, and will live far longer still.

Sonic is a nomad and lives anywhere as long as it's off the grid. He doesn't like other people knowing of his immortality out of fear that it will be exploited somehow. Eggman Nega would eventually prove that fear true, and some of his scars are from encounters with him.

(Some scars are from his childhood, but the prominent one running down his torso and the one in his ear, as well as a few other big ones covered by bandages, are relatively recent. They're indicative of some of the ways he has died before, if you're willing to take a guess.)

Shadow has taken over the role as Mobius' current hero, at least in the eyes of the public, but Sonic has remained a hero of legend. Silver also does his fair share of hero-ing, too, and is constantly chasing after Nega and foiling his plans with Shadow's help. Sonic will come in and help often, but leaves just as quickly as he came, often remaining unseen.

Meanwhile, Tails uses his kitsune powers to appear as a regular fox and hide his status as immortal. He poses as a local mechanic in Onyx City (the city from Archie Sonic Universe's Silver Age arc, but like. A good future instead of a dystopia) and helps Shadow and Silver covertly with his advanced tech.

When he's not saving the world from impending doom, Sonic either wanders the world to find places to nap in, hangs out with Tails or Shadow, or is hunted down by Nega.

Sonic's immortality allows him to regenerate and come back whenever he dies. The Chaos Energy inside of him won't let him die, he just heals and comes back, but it often leaves a scar, especially if the injury is severe. It's left him with chronic pain and fatigue. He uses a cane he carved himself out of a stick, unless in werehog form, where he just walks on all fours instead.

As a werehog, he's extremely irritable and pretty feral, but since he can control when he transforms most of the time (except new moons), he avoids transforming unless the boost in strength is absolutely necessary.

He's gotten pretty attached to lots of old things that remind him of his friends. Even if those things have started to decay, he hoards them in secret burrows across the world and refuses to let them go. His memory is not the greatest and has gotten worse as he aged, so he holds onto things that remind him of his late friends to ensure they live on in some way.

Anyways, that's all I have for now. Go vote for your favorite Sonic in the smackdown!

[howtofightwrite]

Speaking of martial competence, do you have any examples of characters that are actually written with this in mind?

Loads. Some actually even make good on that.

So, there's different kinds of martial competence. There are characters who are proficient in combat directly, there are well written strategists, there are characters who excel at military leadership, and when they're written well, you can actuallylearn some things from them.

I'm going to give some examples, and at least one cautionary example.

For, just, raw combat prowess, I still go back to Robert E. Howard's Conan short stories. It's easy to meme on the character, especially 90 years after the fact, with the cultural persona that's grown around him, but Howard's original writing is excellent. The character would not have survived Howard's early (and, frankly, tragic) death if it was just the one note gag you might expect, if your only exposure to the character was through cultural osmosis and the films.

Howard's fight scenes were shockingly well written. To the point that it is still absolutely worth reading if you want to write a fantasy fighter.

For strategists, three characters come to mind, but only two are literary, and all are Science Fiction.

Grand Admiral Thrawn is probably one of the best villains Star Wars has ever produced, it's part of why he's one of the few characters that's migrated from the original EU to the Disney era. My personal take is, as a character, he's lost a lot over the years, but the original incarnation from the early 90s novels is a very solid model for a strategist. Particularly in how he takes time to understand his opponents while looking for potential weak points to exploit.

His practice of studying a culture's art to understand their psychology might sound a bit goofy, but the concept does have a real basis. (At least, until it metastasized into a superpower, in later adaptations of the character.) Being able to psychologically assess your foe is an incredibly valuable element of strategy, and one that you probably want to consider when you're writing a character who is supposed to be a “strategic genius.”

When writing fiction, you want to consider all of your characters as if they were people, rather than as hollow, plastic toys. And, yes, the obnoxious villain who knows exactly what your heroes will do because of authorial fiat is going to be a more compelling character than the ambulatory goldfish villain who exists as a prelude for your heroes showing off how badass you think they are.

Granted, even in Heir to the EmpireThrawn was already drawing strategic insights that strained credibility, but understanding your foe is an element of strategic thinking that is often forgotten in literature. So, even as a villain in a tie-in novel (we're not done with tie-in fiction yet), he is worth looking at. At least when written by Timothy Zhan, Thrawn was a well written character, and even if he bordered on a Mary Sue at times, he escaped a lot of that stigma by justifying his competence.

It's also probably worth mentioning in passing that he's one of the few Imperial leaders in Star Wars who isn't also criminally incompetent.

The non-literary example of a strategist would be John Sheridan from Babylon 5. Unlike Thrawn, Sheridan's main strategic focus is on situational exploitation. A little of that comes from his knowledge of enemy procedures and psychology, but at lot of it comes from a rather ruthless approach to technical limitations. An alien race is using technology that blocks human targeting systems? Set up a nuclear mine and then send out a fake distress single to lure them in. Need to deal with a significantly larger, more dangerous ship? Lure them into a gas giant and and let the planet's gravity well drag them past crush depth. Bruce Boxleitner's performance helped sell the character, but Sheridan is a really solid science fiction strategist, who really exemplifies how technical limitations can have enormous strategic considerations.

I'm not citing Sheridan as an excellent example of a leader per se,it's certainly there, but it is harder to unpack from Boxleitner's performance. It does have some good payoffs much later in the series when he starts making some orders that cause his subordinates to sit up and stop what they're doing. And that is a consistent theme even back to his introduction, but, it's a tangible consequence to an intangible cause.

The last example is a negative example, both for strategy and leadership. And, as much as it pains me to say this, at least Orson Scott Card understood that Ender was a bad leader. At least in the original novel. To be blunt, Ender is a mediocre strategist at best. His highlights in the book involve, “inventing armor,” and creative movement in micrograv. That's setting the bar exceptionally low, and while it is reasonably within the range of what you could expect from a pre-teen, that's not much of a justification.

Again, I'm not a fan of Card, and I'm reallynot recommending Ender's Gameto anyone. However, if I didn't mention it, you know there'd be a reblog going for twelve hundred words about how Andrew Wiggin is the best strategist in literature, which, yeah, no.

Do you want a goofy, tie-in fiction, literary suggestion for the best leader in sci-fi? Too bad, because I'm pretty sure Ciaphas Cain is not that person. The Ciaphas Cain novels by Sandy Mitchell are unusual as leadership recommendations, because of how much Cain internally processes the social manipulation involved in military leadership. He's not a great leader, but he is exceptionallygood at explaining to the reader how he's creating that illusion to motivate the soldiers around him. In fairness, some of that is an intrinsic character flaw, he is incredibly insecure, and desperately trying to hide that fact. And the difference between being a great leader, and effectively creating a comprehensive illusion of a great leader is: There is no difference. As a serious complement, it is one of the few times I've seen an author treat leadership as an actual skill, and not simply an extension of a character's charisma. Which is why I'm singling this one out. It might sound like a joke inclusion initially, and the books are quite funny in a Warhammer 40k kind of way, but there is quite a bit of  value to be had.

-Starke

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[moodymisty]

hi! i hope you feel better soon!

i was wondering if you plans for continuing your ‘legions reacting to their primarch’s partner’ series ?

have a good one :) 🐊

Part 1, Part 2

Author's Note: Sure, here's the rest of them :3

Relationships: Implied Leman Russ/Reader, AlphariusOmegon/Reader, Sanguinius/Reader, Lorgar/Reader, Ferrus Manus/Reader, Mortarion/Reader, Jaghatai Khan/Reader, Horus/Reader, Fulgrim/Reader, Corvus Corax/Reader (A NOTE: almost all of these are gender neutral, but a few might have the term mother or another female term in it, so fair warning)

Warnings: None really

➧ Space Wolves:

Pretty average. They're definitely one of the better legions to be around if you're a baseline human, as they're not only pretty chill, but actually somewhat... nice? By Astartes standards.

You enjoy listening to them tell battle stories around the bonfire or whatever you're all camped around, and they like how easy it is to impress you with their feats of strength. Evenings can quickly devolve into one on one duels if you're around, and there's enough Mjød involved. Impressing Wolf Mother with your spur of the moment honor duel is the height of accomplishment, for a hammered Space Wolf.

You would hope Russ would stop these shenanigans, but you’ll find yourself disappointed when he joins in, brawling his own Astartes for your attention that he already has.

They also all find it absolutely hilarious when you use one of their tamed Fenrisian wolves as a mount, as it puts you at eye level with them.

➧ Alpha Legion:

Your relationship with Alpharius & Omegon is as ambiguous as how the Alpha Legion Astartes feel about you.

They don't like the twins having a potential weak spot that can be exploited by enemies, and their myriad of plans and spiderweb of secrets could get easily unraveled; But if the twins brought you into the inner circle, they’ll place trust that they did it for a reason.

It's just a bit, disorienting having so many men- some of which look very similar- coming in and out of your life. The twins know that you can tell them apart from their legion lookalikes (somehow and it pisses them off), but they still find it funny to try and slip things past you.

➧ Blood Angels:

As one of the kinder chapters, you being brought into the fold is of little resistance, largely because they see how happy Sanguinius is when you're around. They may be battle hardened warriors, but they find it difficult to express their worries when their Primarch has never looked happier holding your much tinier hand.

However the Blood Angels already have a protective (border-lining on obsessive) nature with their Primarch, and that is something that now extends in fold to anyone Sanguinius is close to. Being you.

Do not expect to go anywhere with any less than three fully armored Blood Angels. They will glare at anyone who comes close, they will scold anyone who speaks to you without proper prose, and you will have to deal with it. Some may have a developing soft spot for their kind Legion Mother which allows you to order them around, but they are very strict in this regard.

And Sanguinius will not stop it; Because he feels the same way as them, he's just better at hiding it.

➧ Word Bearers:

Largely neutral at first, but over time they begin to warm up to you as Lorgar's loving gazes and borderline worshipping talk wears on them. It also helps that they have some non-violent experience with other humans.

There are some however who don't approve of your closeness to Lorgar; Especially as it becomes more obvious that Lorgar's priorities are changing, and his distractions are getting worse. You becoming the idée fixe of Lorgar's mind is more than a bit concerning for some members of the legion, particularly ones touched by Kor Phaeron.

They hold their tongues, but you know they don't like whenever the two of you are alone. You've heard the word 'temptress' uttered more than once.

➧ Iron Hands:

Extremely blunt, and to the point. like the Imperial Fists, but without the protective streak. Iron Hand brutal efficacy doesn't exactly mix with the slow nurturing of what one could consider romance.

But you show genuine interest in the practices of the legion and don't impede on their chapter traditions, so the Iron Hands suppose it could be worse. They'd much rather their Primarch not be distracted however, and that is a theme that will remain present in any conversation regarding you for a long while. Expect them to basically ignore you for the first portion of your relationship with Ferrus.

Rude...

➧ Death Guard:

The Death Guard are one of the legions that is definitely more conflicted about the whole thing.

On one hand they say that he will end up distracted, eyes pulled away from his crusade to more frivolous things like romance. But on the other hand, if it does away with some of Mortarion's depressive moue, then they can bite their tongues about it. Either way, they definitely aren't fans of it, and you'll more than hear about it.

Legion meetings are, more than a bit stressful. Mortarion often times comes back ragged and angry after being told he should be rid of you.

Things are strained. You hope they'll level out with time.

➧ White Scars:

Probably one of the better legions to be in. Helps that they don't despise baseline humans, and actually know how to smile sometimes.

It's refreshing to be around Astartes who are a little less, stuck up, something you say under your breath not long after being officially introduced to them. They find it absolutely hilarious.

You have a few Astartes you're a bit more familiar with that Jaghatai trusts to be your personal guard, in the rare moments he isn't close. Pretty chill all around.

Unless there's about seven of them all eagerly surrounding you trying to teach you different Chogoran words, then it's significantly less chill.

Also jetbike rides sound rad af

➧ Luna Wolves:

They have their doubts as all legions do, but given Horus' charisma it isn't long before they toss those doubts aside, and quickly welcome you into the fold at Horus' side.

Also similar to the Blood Angels in that they get near feral protecting their genefather's beloved. It's like his obsessive nature somehow has somehow manifested or has been genetically implanted in them. Horus always makes sure you have a guard at your side, no matter where you go.

It was all fine at first, but now you're beginning to feel a bit like a prisoner.

➧ Raven Guard:

The Raven Guard are pretty tame all things considered. While conversations tend to be respectfully brief, you've noticed overtime that it's less so disinterest, and more a so near nervous formality. It's almost like they don't know how to talk to a baseline human woman for more than a few moments. It's, cute.

Nykona doesn't seem to mind you though; Largely because he overheard you mumble that you think his armor is the most impressive out of all of the Raven Guard Astartes during a sparring session between him and Corax.

Overall, they’re happy Corvus is happy, and as long as his main mission isn’t compromised, they’re content to have you here.

While most legions say ‘Legion Mother’ however, the Raven Guard tend to use the title ‘Raven Mother’ instead when being formal. When they started saying that instead of just legion mother, you noticed how it intertwines with how they refer to Corvus.

Once you realized you got a little bit too excited they’d finally started accepting you, and scared the shit out of no less than three guards by abruptly crying.

➧ The Emperor's Children:

They do enjoy being around humans that can appreciate the arts, and they don't hold much ill will towards you as the jewel of their Primarch's eye. If anything, they seem almost pleased their Primarch is able to pursue such things. You're welcomed into the fold with little fanfare, and Legion business continues on with nary a peep about Fulgrim's new wife.

Many of them create things for you, which while incredibly sweet, makes Fulgrim a little miffed if you show too much joy about it. He just gets a bit jealous, but it's harmless. You find it kind of cute.

[whetstonefires]

Do you have any opinions on Scholomance?

I do! I like it a lot. I really enjoyed all three books, blitzed through them easily and was much more excited to see how the plots unfolded than I'm used to these days, as a jaded adult, and I also really appreciated them as works of craft.

Especially the first one, I spent the whole time being all 'wow!' at how simple it was. So easy to read, but no waste. You really need to know what you're doing, to get that kind of pared-down elegance of form to work and still fit so much content in.

Like these are dense, there's a fantastic stylistic minimalism that allows El's character all the space it needs to breathe by making absolutely every other thing and person in the whole novel also do character work for her, which is exactly where the first person voice shines.

Also great use of character perspective to make the pacing feel really natural, so the fact that the first book takes three weeks, the second book takes one year, and the third book is like. Five or so incredibly stressful days spread out over the course of a few weeks? Doesn't feel imbalanced.

I actually got distracted from the story a few times by noticing the strength of Novik's technique. 😂 This is a me problem, in itself it's the opposite of distracting. Very low-profile.

I think the Scholomance is a great example of how far you can go in specfic when you aren't cringing from the label 'derivative,' because the Scholomance books feel very fresh ad clean specifically because nothing in them is concerned with standing out as 'original,' whatever that's supposed to mean, only with being well-executed and suitable to its task.

Hm, maybe that's where Liesel was born, the intersection of the efficient narrative style and the vast proportion of the story that concerns the maximization of utility and the instrumentalization of persons by themselves and others, and the forces that incentivize these behaviors. Or maybe she's just the narrative counterweight to Orion 'Head Empty' Lake lmao. How's that for a principle of balance, Galadriel?

I really did enjoy how beautifully it was laid out, over and over, in dozens of shades of humanity, how no matter where you go in an exploitative system almost everyone is being driven by the same survival instincts.

Because I don't think I've ever seen made so cleanly clear why you just can't expect any person or small group of people, no matter their level of goodwill or status, to unmake one of these systems from the inside; how it's not a matter of people being bad but of every single person being very...small.

And then not retreating into the idea of a person who is Big coming and breaking the cruel system from the outside as some kind of panacea, because 1) that is terrible, even if it's necessary and done in the best way possible and 2) that's not a sustainable answer to anything. Getting a balance between the protagonist being able to effect change and not subscribing to the great man theory of history can be really tricky!

Also did I mention, I love El, and I love most of the cast, even the dreadful ones. How am I going around with this many feelings about Li Shanfeng who doesn't appear until the actual climax?

The romance murdered me a bit, but it took up no more space than it absolutely needed to do its job, and I respect that. Also I appreciated Orion as a love interest; Novik has a slight record at this point of a version of that style of male love interest who's like a caricature of Mr. Darcy but old, which was shaping up to be my least favorite thing about her body of work.

...Orion is kind of like if you took the human king from Spinning Silver and gave him an alignment flip come to think of it, so he's not coming out of nowhere. Lmao.

Which reminds me (re: romance character typing) I've heard Novik didn't want it to be known she was astolat, which this series has renewed my sympathies if so. Because if I were a published novelist I wouldn't want people going 'you know, that resolution was really emotionally satisfying! reminds me of that fic she wrote where optimus prime and megatron get stuck in a hole underground and hatefuck about it.'

I don't even like Transformers. That fic almost made me cry. Actually I suspect it reads better if you don't like Transformers because I'm sure it does not give a shit about canon.

Anyway, whoever pointed out that one of the things El has going on is she's Enoby (and we're going to sit down and explore what the true reason to put your middle finger up at preps is, and what are some constructive ways to channel that socioeconomic wrath, and what it means that there is no ethical consumption under capitalism) was right and I'm not entirely over that either.

Fucking love El's mom as a character. Spectacular level of parent relevance and usefulness. A+.

Aadhya and Liu are also characters who fucking delivered.

Re: minimalism though, I laughed at the start of The Golden Enclaves when I realized that none of the enclaver characters who'd gotten development in the the first two books were from London, the enclave El was theoretically shooting for when we met her.

[intimidating-fettuccine]

Could you do some more Sub Liu hcs? If not feel free to ignore. Have a nice day!

The only sub Liu HCs I wrote were a very long time ago and it was just a tiny snippet, so I'm just gonna count this as rewriting it. Also I added in Sully stuff because I wanted to correct it and it's easier to do them in one post than two, I hope you enjoy and I hope you have a nice day!

As I said in the previous one I think you're referencing, Liu actually enjoys submitting for his partner quite a bit. He doesn't feel the need to be dominant or submissive specifically and can do either, but I think he enjoys submitting quite a lot. I think he really enjoys letting go and allowing his partner to be the one in charge for a change. I think Liu does good from a bit of subbing to be honest, especially considering his general insecurities, so if you lay on some body praise and worshipping pretty thick, make sure to focus on making him feel good and making him know that you enjoy doing that.

 I previously said in that post that Sully would never submit for someone, and my opinions have changed so I'm correcting that too. If you get to the stage where Sully is in love with you and feels loved by you, he could absolutely submit to you, you just have to be a bit soft and careful with him. He's a bit scared about it at first, but he actually loves subbing, probably more than Liu does. Sully is always putting in so much work and effort to take care of the people he cares about and to protect him, and so to be able to just let go and allow someone to truly care about and take care of him feels unbelievably good. Both of them are quite happy to dom for you any time you want, but seriously, they are also MORE than happy to sub for you, as it comes naturally to both of them very easily, and I think they tend to enjoy sex a lot when they're able to be loved and cared for. 

Now, to list their differences! Liu prefers more vanilla subbing. He likes to be laid back, kissed all over, and praised as you go. I think Liu really enjoys having his nipples touched and played with, and I think he feels very sensitive on his hips and his back, so feel free to exploit that as you will. Liu tends to whimper and whine, and he's pretty quiet starting out, but the closer he gets to cumming, the louder he gets. He tends to lay pretty still throughout the whole thing, but his hands like to be on you, and his face is flushed bright red the whole time, and sometimes he might even cry. Liu likes body praise and edging, and when you combine both you can absolutely wreck him. If you tease him and avoid giving him what he needs he tends to start begging you for it pretty easily, whining pretty loudly as he does so.

Sully, on the other hand, likes to get a bit kinkier. He likes to be restrained (he prefers silk ties since they're gentle), with his hands and legs tied down. He doesn't like to be blindfolded, but he wouldn't mind a gag every now and then. He prefers when you suck and bite at his skin, covering him in bruises and bite marks, and he's also a fan of nail scratches. Sully feels more sensitive on his neck and legs, and he tends to moan and talk more than he whines or whimpers. He likes reassuring you that you're doing a good job and making him feel good as you go because he feels more at ease with communication. Sully tends to squirm around a lot, twitching and wiggling when he feels good. Sully really likes the difference in receiving pain while being praised, but only light pain, not hard. The other thing they both share, is that they both give you oral while they're being submissive for you. Liu loves to be on his hands and knees when he does it though (also, put your hands in his hair and pull on it for him), and Sully prefers if you use his mouth while he's restrained. They might be a bit different, but both of them really enjoy subbing for you. It honestly makes them feel much more comfortable and loved by you when you take control of them. 

[daresplaining]

Mattea Murdock, the Daredevil Drummer of Philly

In celebration of the forthcoming new Spider-Punk: Arms Race series (not to mention Hobie stealing scenes in "Across the Spider-Verse" last year), I wanted to finally write up my long-overdue overview post on Mattea Murdock! If you haven't read her introductory run yet, check it out here.

Mattea truly stands on her own in the wide canon of alternate universe DDs. She is a female Daredevil, she is Latina, and she somehow managed to escape Marvel's NYC gravity and base herself in Philadelphia, where she defends its citizens from violence and exploitation. Hobie and his self-styled Spider-Band encounter her in Spider-Punk (2022) #3, when they make a detour to fix the busted Spider-Van. They are all immediately-- and correctly-- impressed.

Mattea: "Yo, Kam!" Hobie: "Wait, you know each other?!" Kamala: "Duh! You think I wouldn't know the Daredevil Drummer of Philly?" Hobie: "You're a drummer too?" Mattea: "Best in town." Hobie: "Oh man, my friend Gwen is a pretty dope drummer too. I think y'all would definitely get along." Mattea: "Hope they're ready to get outplayed by a pretty, blind girl." Spider-Punk vol. 1 #3 by Cody Ziglar, Justin Mason, Jim Charalampidis, and Travis Lanham

I talked a little about her killer character/costume design when she was first introduced (I was a fool; of course she's blind), and my love for her look has only grown. It's badass, distinctive, and it slots her beautifully into Hobie's punk rock world while still evoking that trademark Daredevil image (red, sticks, pointy bits...). Her irises are red, which is a visual choice I enjoy in more heightened, fantastical DD stories/art styles, and I think it works for Mattea. Heck, I could even imagine them being colored contact lenses she's chosen to wear for the aesthetic. Also, one detail that wasn't in the previews is the fun little laughing devil face on the back of her jacket (I'm not punk rock enough to get the reference if it is one, but it reminds me of Darkdevil):

Of course, always a big priority for me is Daredevil's power-set, and Mattea provides a quick primer on her unique perspective, mostly focused on hearing and the radar sense:

Mattea: "What? You think just 'cause I'm a blind girl, I can't see? Echolocation, my abuelas used to call it. But it's more intimate. Instinctual. Can hear a kick drum from ten blocks away. Can see it too. If I think hard enough, I can even see what the garage it's being played in looks like." Hobie: "Yo, are you doing it right now?" Riri: "She's definitely doing it right now."

This is not my favorite description of Daredevil's powers, nor-- to be honest-- a particularly informative one. She can gather spatial information through walls...from ten blocks away? I also never love an overuse of visual language in any explanation of these powers, especially as it's implied that Mattea, like Matt, is completely blind. Surprisingly, no direct mention is made here of the hypersenses as a whole, beyond the reference to hearing a kick drum from ten blocks away. Even her hearing doesn't receive that much attention in the story overall, which feels like a missed opportunity for such a musical character. Her blindness, too, is pretty much irrelevant to the story, and never comes up again. But I do LOVE that she uses the term "echolocation", though is still very clearly the radar sense, in all its vague, undefined, semi-magic glory.

And visually? This is great. I'm always a fan of the cross-hatching visual, especially against a black background, and artist Justin Mason doesn't go too overboard on the detail, which is another preference of mine. And thematically, I love the ways in which Mattea's drummer identity is tied into her superheroics-- not just for laying a beatdown on bad guys, but also for channelling and enhancing her echolocation/radar sense. One of my favorite scenes in the comic is when she plays a drum solo on a roof edge to scope out the Kingpin's lair. I'm willing, in that moment, to ignore any gripes about radar sense irregularities out of respect for the coolness and thematic heft of the concept. I mean, this rocks:

Mattea: "Come on, show me the good stuff."

At the end of the day, though, this is not a Daredevil comic and Mattea is not the main character. Plus, it's only five issues long, and introduces a bunch of other new characters as well. There was only ever going to be room for the creative team to offer a cursory introduction, hopefully generating enough interest to prompt these characters to appear again in other comics. In that, I think they fully succeeded with Mattea; we get a cursory sense of her powers (or at least, enough to show that they're the normal DD set), her personality (delightfully cocky, playful, tough, fearless), a few hints of her backstory, and some truly kickass fight scenes. There's a bit of suspension of disbelief required to believe she can use drumsticks as a stand-in for billy clubs (unless her drumsticks are made of something really hefty-- and hey, maybe they are), but this is Spider-Punk. Hobie killed Norman Osborn with a guitar--twice. It's not about realism, it's about style.

Mattea: "Been waiting for this for a long time, Fisk. Real long time." Fisk: "I'm going to break you, li'l girl--AWGGH!" Mattea: "Big, strong man who sends out his band of wackos to push over people too weak to fight back." Fisk: "Wouldn't get too cocky, girlie...you're not the only one who's fast! I'm gonna hurt ya. A lot. Then I'm gonna kill ya. And I'm gonna love every second of it. You know, this is the same look you had when I had your old band clapped a few years back. I like it. Brings out your eyes--GAAAH!" Mattea: "There's something you need to understand about me, papi. I'm not the kinda girl who goes down without a fight."

I can't wait to see more of Mattea and learn more about her, her world, her friends, and her enemies. In particular, she seems to have a history (possibly romantic?) with this world's Kamala Khan, and I would love to see more of that relationship. While Mattea Murdock clearly has a lot in common with Matt Murdock, she also seems happy to be a team player, unlike Matt, and I really enjoy that. Though I guess it's not that surprising a distinction. After all, every drummer needs a band.

[gayoung-lover]

baby, you drive me crazy ๋࣭⭑ chocol

your relationship with gayoung is a secret, given that she happened to be your best friend's ex-girlfriend—sometimes, something that's wrong feels better, doesn't it?

| cw: suggestive, reader is a bad friend LOL | wc: 1.5 k 🫶 | things in italics are flashbacks!! | also, this is inspired by 'que onda' by fuerza regida, i don't like corridos, but the lyrics are sooooo good 😭

Adrenaline coursed through your veins every time you went on a date with Gayoung—a forbidden thrill. Bada trusted you, and you, in return, exploited it. She was well aware of Gayoung's feelings for you, pleading with you—her best friend—not to get involved with her. Despite her pleas, there you were, seated in her black luxury car, on the way to her apartment. 

Bada was consistently curious about the mysterious girl featured in your Instagram stories. You shared photos where only her hands were visible or showing the expensive gifts she got you—however, there was a noticeable absence of her face or any identifiable details. Each time Bada asked, you only said you wanted to keep it a secret, fueling her suspicions that you might be involved with someone with a girlfriend or, worse, married. Despite her attempts to discuss it with you, you only insisted that this girl preferred a private life.

She wanted to taste me—so I satisfied her craving.

Initially, Gayoung was upfront about her desire—a one-night stand. She confessed through a simple text message that whenever she went to your and Bada's apartment, she only thought of you—craving to kiss, touch, and hold you. Drawn to her attractiveness, you complied. 

gayoung: I know this might be weird and you might hate me or whatever because I broke up with Bada, but I wanted to be honest about something. [1:03 a.m]

y/n: huh? what? [1:05 a.m]

gayoung: Every time I went to Bada's place, I couldn't take my eyes off you. 

gayoung: You're such a gorgeous girl, you're like a pretty doll. 

gayoung: And fuckkk… I just wanted to kiss your pretty lips so badly, to wrap my arms around you, to make you feel good. [1:07 a.m]

y/n: are you drunk? or are you actually being honest? [1:08 a.m]

gayoung: Might be a bit drunk but, do you want me to prove it, princess? [1:08 a.m]

y/n: gayoung don't call me princess fuckk

y/n: this feels so wrong… bada's going to hate me

y/n but, how can you prove it? [1:09 a.m]

However, what started as just a one-time thing transformed into something monthly, then a weekly occurrence, and eventually, a daily routine.  The dynamics shifted beyond physical intimacy; it evolved into something deeper. Now, you spend more time with her than in your apartment, and the relationship has transcended the purely sexual—both of you already have said, 'I love you.'

How about we both turn off our phones at night?

Bada's constant concern for your well-being led her to suggest downloading an app that allows you to share your locations. While this was a safety measure, it suddenly became inconvenient for you, especially when you were at Gayoung's apartment. Initially, you tried turning off your location or even your phone, but Bada quickly received notifications about it, prompting questions you did not want to answer. 

bada <3:  why is your location off?

bada <3: is everything okay?

bada <3: do you need something? [11:43 p.m]

y/n: my battery is dying and if i turn off my location it lasts longer

y/n: i’m still at the club, dw bada :) [11:45 p.m]

However, you devised a workaround by turning off your mobile data. This move guaranteed that your location remained fixed at the last place you connected to the internet. So, when you were at a restaurant or a bar on your way to Gayoung's place, turning off your data made it appear as if you were somewhere else if Bada happened to check.

Do your make-up again, so she doesn't find out what we did.

Gayoung stocked her apartment with everything you could need for touch-ups—makeup, hair products, and perfume. That way, you could maintain an impeccable appearance when you went to your apartment, concealing any signs that you did something with someone. Despite you insisting on bringing your own makeup, Gayoung insisted on spoiling you.

"Baby, go ahead and choose whatever you like." Gayoung smiled at you as you walked through the makeup store. "Anything, okay?" She emphasized.

"But, the stuff I like tends to be expensive." You casually grabbed a liquid lipstick and a face powder from the display. "This should do; I just need to touch up my lipstick and powder."

You placed them in the basket, and Gayoung let out a sigh. "I said, pick whatever you want. Price doesn't matter."

Surprised, you looked at her and hesitated. "I don't want you spending a fortune on me-"

She cut you off, raising an eyebrow. "Princess, grab whatever you want. Let me spoil you."

Baby, delete those photos that we took yesterday.

You and Gayoung always took photos together—where you could clearly see who she was, although these photos never made it to any social media posts. You were her muse, her precious girl, and whether it was at the club, having dinner, or at her apartment, she could not resist taking pictures of you. At times, these photos would be too risqué—like right now.

"That's perfect, doll." Gayoung murmured as you struck a pose, reclining on her bed. "Fuck, you're stunning, you know that?"

"I'm aware." You smiled at Gayoung's camera. "You're the one who makes me feel pretty."

Shifting positions, you rested your stomach on her bed, tilting your head slightly while adjusting your hair. "I'm glad I'm the only one who gets to see you like this." She said—her voice low and husky. 

Your eyes, your skin.

Unable to resist any longer, Gayoung approached you, gently cupping your face as you sat on the bed, and she stood up. With doe-like eyes, you gazed up at her—the innocence reflected in them driving Gayoung wild. She kissed your forehead, her lips lingering there for a few seconds.

"Do you know how much I love you?" Gayoung's forehead now rested against yours.

"I do." You replied. "I love you too, Gayoung."

"But not as much as I do." She lowered her face, bringing her lips close to your ear, her breath brushing against your skin. "I love everything about you. I don't even know why I was with Bada when I could have been with you from the start, doll." She chuckled dryly.

While another best friend might have killed her for saying those words, you blushed hearing Gayoung say them. "Oh, really? Tell me what you love about me."

Turning her head to the left, she kissed your cheek. "Your eyes, your skin, your personality, your beautiful body." Gayoung listed. Lifting her face, she looked down at you, placing her thumb over your lips, prompting them to part. "But your lips are my favorite thing about you."

Drawing closer, your lips brushed against each other—you smiled against her lips. "Gayoung-"

She silenced you by pressing her lips against yours, your hands instinctively locking behind her neck, pulling her even closer to your body.

What’s going on?

While you and Gayoung kissed, your phone incessantly rang, prompting a frustrated sigh against her lips. "What the fuck? Who's calling me?" You rolled your eyes.

Gayoung patted your back. "What if it's something important, doll?"

"Yeah, you're right." You admitted, reaching for your phone only to discover 15+ missed calls from Bada. "It's Bada."

She raised her eyebrows. "What does she want?"

You called her back, concerned that it might be an emergency, but she did not answer. "She won't pick up, fuck..." You muttered.

"Do you want to go back to your apartment?" Gayoung asked, holding your hand trying to calm you.

Attempting to call Bada once more, you nodded. "Yes." You whispered, but just as you were about to get up from the bed, your phone vibrated with a text from Bada.

Answer her messages, tell her what's up.

bada <3: what the fuck is this y/n

bada <3: bada <3 sent a photo [10:56 p.m]

Attached to the message was a screenshot of your exact location, and it dawned on you that you had forgotten to turn off your mobile data. The undeniable realization that you fucked up hit you—you showed your phone to Gayoung, who responded with a crooked smile, chuckling at the situation.

“I guess one day she had to find out.” She said and you nodded.

bada <3: all this time you had been dating the person “who liked living their life privately” you’ve been fucking my ex? 

bada <3: i can’t believe i trusted you wtf, i don’t want your shit in the apartment, come pick it up tomorrow when i’m not around

bada <3: hope you have fun ig don’t even think about apologizing or anything i fucking hate you [10:59 p.m]

Gayoung took your phone from your hands, opening the option to send a video. "Come here, princess."

Your eyes widened in surprise, but you followed her instructions, moving closer even though she was recording. Holding the phone just right to capture you kissing, Gayoung separated, smirking at the camera before sending the video to Bada.

"That should tell her what's up." She said, winking at you.

[crypticjackal13]

Hello! I was wondering when you have time, can I request wukong,macaque,nezha and Mk with an Angst to fluff with their s/o who got possessed in the fight with Lbd but then un-possessed s/o leaving them injured bc the attacks didn’t do as much damage as she thought?

I think I understand what's being asked but if I got it completely wrong please correct me! Also this is going to be Headcanons because it makes more sense for my brain ;-;

Wukong, Macaque, Nezha, and MK x S/O who was previously possessed by LBD (Angst to Fluff Romantic HC's)

Wukong - a wreck. Absolutely furious at himself for letting this happen to you, how could he be so stupid and let you be possessed by his enemy? Even worse, she had abandoned using you as her host and you were hurt! Probably trying ridiculously hard to keep up a positive front but he is breaking down on the inside. After it's all over he takes you back to Flower Fruit and gives you the best healing magic he can find. Lots of attention, and you'll have to reassure him you're okay and that it's not his fault because he 10000% thinks it is. He loves you very deeply, so the thought of losing you is just super overwhelming for him. He stays as close as you'll allow him to be while you recover, and is at your beck and call. This is a perfect time for you to either exploit this and get whatever you want OR coax him into doing self care with you. Or both :)

Macaque - beyond pissed. If anyone should've gotten hurt, it should've been him! You shouldn't have been anywhere close to this situation, and there you were being used as her host! As soon as he sees your discarded body he gets you someplace safe until the fight is over, and then he takes you home to help you recover. He might pretend to be a bit mad at you for having been involved but just know he doesn't really mean it, what he means is that he is utterly relieved you're okay. Once he has you set up with whatever medical supplies are needed, a drink, and a warm meal, he cuddles up to you and keeps watch while you get better. Apologizes over and over.

MK - this poor boy DOES break down. If he had done better, if he had been stronger, he could've stopped the Lady Bone Demon before she was able to possess you! He's crying a bit as he's fighting because he knows that you're probably in so much pain, just like he was whenever she was speaking to him. The fight ends, and he's absolutely RUSHING to get you home so you can get medical attention. He doesn't leave your side, he feels like if he does then something bad will happen to you. Similar to Wukong, he will find a way to get you anything you want, because you deserve the best, especially from him. Very clingy afterwards, but if you ask him to he will back off a bit so you can breathe.

Nezha - so so so concerned. How could he have been so blind? In dealing with Wukong and getting his ass handed to him he left you vulnerable! He feels incredibly guilty like he's let you down and multiple times throughout recovery he asks if you honestly want to keep being with him. He gets you to Heaven's best doctors, and urges you not to lift a finger until you're completely healed. He's super protective and may overreact to small things, just make grabby hands at him and he'll soften up and give you cuddles or whatever it is that you want.

[kafus]

i did some ridiculous technical BS in pokemon again

NOTE: not only is this post a very very long infodump from yours truly, it is also specifically an infodump involving a lot of pokemon glitches and exploits. even though i don't tamper with my games and everything achieved here can be done on original hardware with no hacking or what-have-you, some people still may consider this Cheating based on their own personal standards of legitimate gameplay. i ask that you please don't try to start arguments with me about pokemon legality and just take it all as an interesting technical infodump about gen 3 pokemon okay thank you <3

SO. i decided that before pokemon bank eventually shuts down one day in the probably-not-so-distant future and makes old gen transfer impossible, i need more ribbon master pokemon (AKA a pokemon with all the ribbons it can possibly receive from its gen of origin to the most recent gen it can transfer to) from gens 3 and 4. i've been meaning to ribbon master a pokemon from gen 3 based on my favorite singer, KAF (you don't need to know anything about kaf for this story whatsoever but you should check her out LMAO) and while musing over what pokemon would suit her best, it came to me.

FARIGIRAF IS JUST KAF'S FURSONA!! the monster teeth hoodie with the eyes. even has the dangly bits. like come on it's perfect. AND girafarig is obviously available in gen 3 so i could RM a kaf girafarig and then evolve her once i got to SV. Cool! Awesome! but here's the problem. I CAN'T SETTLE FOR JUST A NORMAL GIRAFARIG. I HAVE TO GO ALL OUT!!

i started brainstorming my ideal gen 3 kaf girafarig, and came to the following conclusions:

i obviously want the girafarig to be shiny. i mean come on

i want her to be a girl for obvious reasons, and gentle nature to match her personality. just because Armor Tail is better on Farigiraf i also want it to have girafarig's second ability, Early Bird. i'm not concerned with IVs because i think random IVs add flavor and that would add more tedium than i was already dealing with

i want her to be japanese language origin since kaf is a japanese singer (i can nickname her かふ that way too!)

i want the original trainer (OT) name to be PPさん (PP-san) in reference to the person who scouted out kaf's talent in the first place - he goes by Piedpiper online and my friends and i call him PP as a joke sometimes

i want the trainer ID to be 02018 because 2018 is kaf's debut year

since girafarig only spawns in gen 3 in the ruby/sapphire/emerald safari zone, i wanted to hatch a girafarig egg in firered/leafgreen for the kanto origin, which is impossible otherwise. FRLG are also really important games to me, leafgreen being the first pokemon game i ever owned or played, so that's a bonus

now you may be looking at this entire list and being like. What the fuck. how do you intend to shiny hunt girafarig with all of these hyperspecific parameters, especially in FRLG where the everstone passing nature doesn't exist and flame body doesn't even exist to hatch eggs faster. you will be doing that long after bank shuts down. and you're intending on doing this on original hardware too??? WELL. that's where ACE and RNG manipulation comes in babey. i am GOING to attempt to make this comprehensible even if you've never touched ACE or RNG manip in your life, even tangentially, but sorry if this is a bit of a mess it's pretty technical LOL. the rest of this post is going below a cut cause it Goes Places!!

ACE and RNG manipulation explained (kinda)

first off a quick overview of ACE, ACE stands for arbitrary code execution, which is the ability to run your own (arbitrary!) code within the game. this can be set up with a series of elaborate glitches, that break open the gen 3 pokemon games into letting you run your PC box names as code, enabling you to do pretty much anything you want. to be upfront, i'm not an expert on ACE - i understand it in an overarching conceptual sense and am able to follow ACE guides just fine, but i cannot write my own ACE code, which essentially requires you to know some GBA assembly. doesn't really matter for the purpose of this story though.

you can see an example of a tiny snippet of a larger ACE code with the PC box name below. it looks like gibberish but that's because every character used in the name corresponds to a specific internal value, which when all run together, is code!

i need ACE in FRLG because resetting for, or RNG manipulating (more on that in a moment), trainer ID (and secret ID, also more on that later) is pretty much impossible. ACE will allow me to change my TID to 02018 by essentially just telling the game to do so with my PC boxes. this requires me to set up ACE in emerald first since that's the only game with a viable entrypoint, and then use emerald ACE to make glitch pokemon that can activate ACE in FRLG when traded over.

as for RNG manipulation, that's a bit more straightforward, especially if you've ever watched a speedrun of... pretty much anything with random chance in it. games with random chance are not actually fully random because computers can't really be fully random, and in the older pokemon games with unencrypted and less advanced RNG (random number generator) algorithms, this is pretty easy to exploit.

this is a heavy simplification, but whenever you encounter a wild pokemon in RSE or FRLG, the amount of frames that have passed since the game was turned on are compared to a number that was generated upon boot, called the RNG seed. if you've ever played minecraft you can compare this to world seeds - the pokemon RNG seed determines all possible wild encounters in that play session in a similar fashion as minecraft determining the infinite terrain layout. this comparison determines every aspect of an encountered pokemon; its species, nature, IVs, and so on. so, if you were able to time your wild encounter (or any other type of pokemon encounter) down to the 1/60th of a second frame, you can get the game to spit out whatever pokemon you want at you! you just need a bit of typically invisible information first - the RNG seed, and if you're RNGing a shiny, your secret ID aka SID, which is like an invisible second trainer ID generated alongside your TID that is paired up with the TID and compared against any pokemon you encounter to determine if it should be shiny or not. both of these things can be figured out without hacking or tampering with games/save files.

the most common program used for all things RNG manipulation is called pokefinder and you can see an example of it spitting out what shinies are available on hoenn's first route in the first 100000 frames of the game being on with an RNG seed of 0 and my old TID/SID combo below. it's pretty damn cool to me tbh, i love RNG manipulation and i'm way more versed on it/experienced than i am with ACE

TLDR; rng manipulation is essentially a frame perfect, speedrunning-adjacent trick to get the game to roll the RNG in your favor, including for perfect IVs or shininess. for reasons that will become clear later, this is much easier to do in emerald than any other gen 3 game, so i will be using emerald for the RNG manipulation of the girafarig egg

with ALL of that context out of the way, this was the gameplan:

play through a fresh file of japanese firered (i don't own japanese leafgreen, RIP) all the way through the postgame to unlock trading with hoenn with the name PPさん, not worrying about TID for now. the guide i was following did not have a code for changing name with ACE in japanese FRLG specifically, so i figured playing the game again real quick would be a better alternative to trying to teach myself assembly in an afternoon LOL

set up ACE in my new emerald file i completed recently

use ACE in emerald to generate the glitch pokemon needed to run ACE in FRLG and trade them over. finalize the setup process over in FRLG too

look up possible gentle, ability 2, female, and shiny egg frames, and pick one that looks good to RNG manipulate in emerald, noting its PID (an encounter-specific ID number, pretty much)

figure out what SID, when combined with a TID of 02018, will cause that egg frame to be shiny - that way when the egg is traded over and hatched in firered, it will be shiny

do the RNG in emerald, trade over the to-be-shiny egg to firered, and hatch it after changing the TID/SID with ACE appropriately!! bam female, gentle, early bird, shiny, JP origin girafarig with an OT of PPさん and a visible TID of 02018. Pog!!

to execute that gameplan would take me an entire day, though...

step 1: play through firered

ok gonna be honest this is the ONE part of this entire process that i did not play on original hardware. i wanted to get to the Cool Parts of this process so i decided to play through firered on emulator. absolutely terrible picture sorry but i do actually own japanese firered, so i could dump the game legally to my computer to use speedup in mGBA with a little device called the Joey JR which connects the cart to my computer by USB like so

after that it was pretty much a relatively normal playthrough but obviously with emulator speedup. i used solely my starter blastoise to, well, blast through the rest of the game LMAO. after just a couple of hours or so i was right before the elite four, which i completed while in the car after moving the save file back to my cartridge with the same device, since i had to leave the house to go to a doctor appointment. i tried to take pictures of me beating the game but the sun was not doing the photos any favors lol. blastoise ended up being level 76 by the end. was easy with surf and an ice beam TM from the game corner (i just bought the coins)

unfortunately beating the game isn't the only requirement for trading with the hoenn games, so i also had to complete the whole sevii islands postgame quest... which required me to have 60 registered owned entries in the pokedex, which i wasn't really doing while speeding through the game initially, so i had a lot of mons to catch. i was still out of the house at this point (and playing at normal speed lol) so i wasn't really taking pictures, but i did make a stop at the power plant to look for an electabuzz despite it being an inefficient 5% since i needed a spare anyways for my leafgreen file unrelated to this story lmao. took a pic of it since it took a while to show up. anyway soon enough the dex had 60+ entries! i've played FRLG so many times that the encounter locations are memorized in my mind... i did all of this with no googling asdfkasfd

at this point i got home and was able to do the ruby/sapphire postgame quest on emulator with speedup again, so it was pretty easy. moved the save back to cart and i was done with step 1! obviously this didn't actually take me 21 hours of playtime, that was the emulator speedup's fault loool. from here on out i didn't touch any emulators again!

step 2: set up ACE in emerald

ACE time! i've actually set up ACE in an old emerald file before but i wanted to do it again fresh. i was following a guide pretty much to a T so i'm actually going to skip over the details of some of the steps since you can read about those more in depth over at the guide i was using if you want

TLDR; you have to trade for the NPC trade pokemon, DOTS the seedot and PLUSES the plusle, then EV train DOTS a specific way. these EV values cause DOTS to turn into a glitch pokemon egg 0x0611 when corrupted with the pomeg glitch (more on that in a bit), which, when hatched, runs the PC box names as code, aka ACE! why does it work? if you really want to know, there's plenty of stuff online about it, i'm not the best person to ask haha

it's worth noting that volbeat is really annoying to capture in emerald as it's literally only available as a 1% in one patch of grass, so i caught an illumise instead and bred them until a volbeat hatched lol. was much more efficient

also lol "Take good care of DOTS!" sorry i will be corrupting your son into demonspawn that lets me wield godlike control over your universe

after getting the necessary NPC trade pokemon all ready and moving them into a specific pattern in box 2 (i cloned them with the emerald tower cloning glitch) i had to perform the pomeg glitch. this involves using a pomeg berry to decrease a pokemon's health to 0 without causing a whiteout. this is achieved by getting a pokemon with at least 8 HP EVs to 1 HP and then using the pomeg berry on it, decreasing the EVs and taking off a point of health in the process (it's slightly more steps than this but whatever). i decided to use the camerupt i had during my playthrough of the game for this purpose. just took him to fiery path to get poisoned and walked until he was on 1 HP and healed him with an antidote lol

by doing the pomeg glitch and entering a wild battle, the game gets a bit confused since all the pokemon in your party are fainted and just sends out some sort of glitch decamark pokemon. in this situation, after viewing my camerupt's summary in battle and exiting back out of the summary screen, i was able to corrupt the DOTS and PLUSES sitting in my PC by scrolling up above the usual limit of the party menu, which reaches into data used by the first two PC boxes and fucks them up, ending up with, assuming that i EV trained correctly, a glitched egg that is about to hatch in a nest ball named DOTS with pokerus. this will run ACE when hatched! (if you want more info on this corruption pomeg stuff, check out the bulbapedia article for glitzer popping. yes that's what they named it)

step 3: use emerald ACE to set up firered ACE

so once again you can find a lot more detail on this process over at the guide i was using, but the TLDR of the matter was, i needed to put a bunch of codes into my PC box names to generate a few different glitch mons. specifically, i needed a egg that would hatch into a crobat (yes, fully evolved lol) with a singular glitched out move, that when used in battle in firered, would cause ACE to happen similar to how hatching the corrupted DOTS egg causes ACE to happen in emerald. i also needed a specific buggy shiny umbreon and a very strange glitchy egg.

even though this step was mostly a lot of tedious typing on the gen 3 keyboard (+ i had to redo things once because i made a typo at one point in the process LOL) it was so much fun! the game breaks in so many ways that you would just... never see during normal gameplay and it makes for some really good pictures and whatnot

first of all, when you hatch the 0x0611 egg, it hatches into a decamark of varying colors, in the case of the picture below it's almost imperceptible because the whole sprite is just a black circle, blending in with the background (sorry for the quality on this one, it's a screencap of a video clip i took).

additionally, trying to scroll over the hatched decamark in the PC or viewing its summary screen will crash the game, so to get rid of it, it has to be moved to the front of your party in the party menu, and then you go to the PC to release it through the deposit menu. since the cursor just defaults to the first position of the party and you don't have to scroll over to it, it's possible to release it from here.

oh yes and the umbreon/other glitch egg? similarly screwy - actually after generating them, their sprites are glitched out until you reset the game, so they look like this. behold their nonsense summaries:

after i had all i needed to trade to FRLG, i cloned an extra set of them with the emerald tower glitch again just in case i messed something up and got to trading! here's me receiving them on the firered side:

and last but not least, i'm a little obsessed with the way the glitch move looks in FRLG on the hatched crobat, absolute nonsense:

i finalized setting up the FRLG ACE (check out the guide i linked earlier for more info) and put everything into their proper positions, but before i could actually execute any code... i needed to know what SID i was going for!

step 4 + 5: look up potential egg frames in emerald and find an SID

soo now for looking at potential girafarig eggs. instead of using the program pokefinder which i mentioned earlier, i used a program called pokenav egg rng tool, which is exactly what it sounds like, a tool specialized for rng manipulating eggs with the pokenav in emerald. using it, i was quickly able to generate a whole list of gentle, female, ability 2 (early bird) eggs, and i picked one that was around 1300 frames in since that made for quick resetting attempts, but not so quick that i could barely make my inputs in time. the one i picked was frame 1381. with a TID of 02018, the PID D2C5EF55 would be shiny with an SID of 14962, so i noted that for later in firered. (i figured this out using an old program called RNG Reporter which is what i'm familiar with but i don't recommend using lmao. it's the "Pandora's Box" feature of that software though if you happen to look it up)

i won't make an entire guide on how to do emerald egg RNG here because it's a lot of steps, but i might at some point because the most up to date method isn't super well documented. anyways, here's a very paraphrased version of the process (this is also assuming that you aren't dealing with "redraws", which i wasn't... like i said very paraphrased):

get a pokemon with the ability lightningrod in the front of your party (i used electrike) to make pokenav calls happen more frequently, and a pokemon with flame body or magma armor (i used slugma) to make eggs hatch faster

get a male and a female of the pokemon you want to hatch, in my case girafarig. if you were RNGing IVs, the parent's IVs would be relevant, but i am not RNGing IVs so i didn't care and just caught the first girafarig i could in the safari zone

an egg is attempted to be generated every 255 steps after the parents are deposited in the daycare together, so by timing the usage of a max repel in such a way, it's easy to save the game exactly 10 steps before an egg is generated. do this

using a timer such as eontimer, soft reset and try to take that last 10th step on your target frame. this will also trigger a pokenav call (or lack thereof) and by looking for the phone call you got in the call column of the egg rng tool and whether or not an egg generated at the daycare, you can tell what frame you hit. didn't hit your target? just soft reset and try again, calibrating the timer for your own human error. this can take a while since the timing is precise to 1/60th of a second

once you hit your target frame, woohoo you did it just take the egg and hatch it! if you're RNGing IVs you would actually save before taking the egg and then RNG the IVs separately but that's a whole different thing i'm not explaining here since i wasn't RNGing IVs

i've avoided mentioning it this entire time till now, but emerald is particularly easy to do rng manipulation in because due to a programming error, the rng seed is always 0 - all encounters are predictable and you don't have to dedicate a frame perfect input to getting the right seed, making emerald rng a matter of one frame perfect input instead of two (there ARE ways to get emerald to generate a proper rng seed but that's unrelated here). additionally, its pokenav system means you can see if you got the right egg BEFORE taking it and hatching it... doing egg RNG in any other gen 3 game is basically a death sentence due to multiple untelegraphed frame perfect inputs that have to be executed in a row, plus really long wait times due to hatching eggs on a slower bike without flame body. there's a reason i was not doing this on four island in frlg.

but yeah now i knew what egg frame i was going for and was all prepared to do the RNG, so now it was onto actually executing it all:

step 6: getting kaf girafarig babey!!

before doing the RNG manipulation in emerald, i needed to change my SID and TID in firered finally! this required me to run two different codes, one for SID and one for TID. it was actually pretty painless since the code is nearly identical for both, you just swap out the values of each ID and one character changes in one box name to decide whether you're changing TID or SID. you can find the list of codes i was referencing here.

i was saving my one allotted video clip in this post for changing the TID with the glitched crobat move though because LMAO

^ shoutout to my qpp @/spikyearr for this one i fucking chokedSKFDDSFK

anyway, after doing that i went through the process of the egg rng in emerald (unfortunately no pictures because it's kind of hard to take pics mid-rng) and actually saved before taking the egg so that i'd be able to soft reset after hatching it - i just needed to check to make sure it was gentle and everything, and then i could soft reset, take the egg again, bike around to decrease the egg cycles in emerald since hatching in firered is super slow, and then trade it off before hatching it to go be hatched in firered. i knew it wouldn't be shiny in emerald, so i wasn't concerned with that. it only took 40 or so minutes of attempts before i got her!

and then AT LAST after spending my ENTIRE DAY ON THIS SHIT (like 10x the amount of time on the ACE stuff for the TID instead of the actual RNG itself LOOOL) i just had to trade the egg to firered and hatch it and i was golden!!!!! AAAGH here she is next to my kaf plushies!!!

also a picture of her summary screen after being traded to my english leafgreen!! i am assuming this will be easier to read for most of the people reading this post LOL

THAT'S IT. POST OVER THIS WAS SO LONG. IF YOU MADE IT THROUGH MY RAMBLING GOOD JOB. I HIT THE PHOTO LIMIT HELP ME

anyways yeah i'm gonna be ribbon mastering her and idk i might post about the process as i go. not immediately though i have a platinum playthrough to finish teehee. also if any of this was interesting to you i highly recommend trying out RNG manipulation, it's a really fun way to play pokemon games! gen 5, BW specifically and not their sequels, is REALLY beginner friendly for RNG manipulation as the timing is a lot less precise. check it out, there's plenty of guides online!!

[zagreuses-toast]

I come from a place of sheer curiousity and I just wanna ask genuinely- you say that you're a fan of 13s/ the chibnall era. Why? Doctor who is my favourite show and I've connected with every incarnation deeply and immediately, but have never been able to "click" with 13, despite my best efforts. What is it that you like about her? What is it that you like about chibnalls writing? I want to know and I want to like her/it too, but as of right now, I just... don't. Obviously you're not obligated to, but can you explain why?

Ok so this ended up being a Long Post, so I'm putting my response under the read more. Also I'm assuming you've actually watched the Chibnall era up to The Power of The Doctor, if you haven't then heads up for spoilers and stuff that might not make much sense without context.

Oh and I'm gonna @ @rearranging-deck-chairs and @ssaalexblake because I see their DW opinions all the time and they're really good and they can probably give more nuanced answers on some things. (Idk how well I did on explaining why I liked some of them, and it really is up to personal preference on some things)

Thirteen herself:

There are a lot of reasons I like Chibnalls era, but one of the biggest ones out the gate is definitely Jodie and her acting in the role of the Doctor. I think the way she balances bouncy gregariousness with the colder more angry and mean aspects of the Doctor is great. She does this thing where she can just make her eyes go dead and then smile like it's a threat, like she's gonna bite, especially when going up against villains. It's great. And Jodie herself is a delightful person.

Beyond just physical acting choices, I find the thirteenth Doctors struggle between her anger and secrecy, vs her desire to connect and her joy at life very very compelling. She keeps this distance that's really interesting I think, where she's genuinely attached to and trying to be a friend to the Fam, but still trying to keep her whole past out of the deal, which doesn't work that well, as we see in s12 and Flux. She's surrounded by death and haunted by the knowledge of how little time she has with her friends, (Grace, and she just came back from bill) but she still wants and needs that connection, and she learns to live in the present a bit. I made a whole post about her final regeneration speech here. I love her arc a lot even if it hurts. Also she's such a horrible hypocrite about so many things, which also makes her a fun character to rotate in my head and study like a bug. I do see it as being on purpose, some people seem to think it's just bad writing that she contradicts herself but imo that's a big part of her character.

Chibnalls writing:

I personally like the timeless child plot because :

There are a lot of stories and ideas in the Chibnall era I like, and a lot more I find very compelling. Whatever your opinions on the writing (and I definitely have had a lot of critique for some bits), there were a lot of ideas introduced that were fun and interesting. One of the weaker points of the era IMO is having so much fun stuff set up, but only shallowly or quickly exploring it, and then adding more stuff on top.

A lot of things didn't get the exploration/screen time I thought they deserved (especially characterization and interaction/dialogue wise). But that just gives my brain more to chew on at the end of the day, and I do love what was done during the seasons itself, not just all the potential stuff.

1) I can connect with it, I know Chibnall was coming at it from a place of being an adoptee, but as a native person the story of a kid taken and raised into an imperial/colonial society, who had their history stolen and their body exploited to further that societies ends, hits very close to home.

And 2) I have a "everything is true at once" approach to canon and I think the more origin stories we make for the Doctor the funnier it is.

This era had a lot of repeating themes, ideas that showed up and we're explored in a lot of different circumstances, often with a rule of 3 aspect to it. One is themes of Empire and Exploitation. Particularly through the stenza in s11 (empire using up planets, introduced to us basically doing foxhunts for clout, but with People instead of foxes), the dalek specials, the Cybermen in s12, and Division/the timelords in flux (as well as the sontarans &co).

Within that there's the repeating motif of how by exploiting people or their beliefs for power the imperial power/bad guys sew the seeds of their destruction. From Tzim Sha using the Ux and them turning against him, to the Division being destroyed by the Ravagers, who they tried to use to get rid of the Doctor/the old universe (and the doctor and even the master going rogue in the first place). Hell even Kerblam! (I know I know) Has a version, where the AI system being used to do terrible things is the one to call the doctor for help!

Another standout are themes of breaking cycles, Ryan is estranged from his dad and was distancing himself from Graham, but they both put in the work and grow extremely close over their two seasons. He also chooses to leave the TARDIS when he realizes he's absent from his friend's lives and wants to be present. And the Doctor gets to break the cycle of exploitation that Tecteun started, when she meets a vulnerable being with mysterious power (the energy being from TPOTD) she helps it free itself, on a way she wasn't helped.

Individual character stuff:

Going again into more individual character stuff I love, I've gotta give it to Sacha Dhawan for being a fucking superb Master. His acting is bonkers amazing and he does a great job portraying the sorta huge personal crisis the master is going through, and externalizing via evil schemes. At the end of Twelves run we saw Missy try to be like the doctor, to get her friend back (and even succeed a bit) but end up dying for it. Now we come back to a master who died trying to be like the person they see as their only equal, and has discovered (wrongly) that they were never equal to begin with, that the doctor is so much more than them. So he tries to make her like him instead, and If she won't become like him and kill them both along with the rest of gallifrey, then he will become her properly this time (by body snatching), ruin her legacy, and die with her eventually (overtaking her in the same way his whole existance has now been caused/overtaken by the doctor in his eyes, because of her being the source of regeneration)

Also can we talk about the Yaz?? I've been dying to talk about Yaz!!! I love her a lot and I find her fascinating, shes probably my favorite companion based on just sheer amount of time spent Thinking about her. Her doctorification/character arc is so good

Yaz is into the travelling and saving the day lifestyle the Doctor gives her for the responsibility of it all, for feeling useful and capable and good. Her early characterization Monet's include her complaining about not having more interesting jobs as a cop because she wants responsibility, she wanted to be important and helpful (that's the entire reason she became a cop, to help people like she was helped when she was in a dark place, and she finds a better way of doing that with the Doctor). And she GETS THERE, narratively and on a character level, she spends three years on earth with her own companions! She co-pilots the TARDIS and can fly her herself! She saves the day when the master steals the doctors body! And most of all SHES EXTREMELY SAD AT THE END BECAUSE THE PERSON SHE LOVES DIED BEFORE HER!! JUST LIKE THE DOCTOR !! (ugly crying) (I could write a whole other post about thasmin, good and bad, but a lot of people have put it better than me)

Also, I'm a big TARDIS girlie, she has somehow ended up being one of my favorite characters in doctor who, and the chinball era does so much fun stuff with the TARDIS!! Different writers take different approaches to the TARDIS, and how alive vs inanimate, or how active vs passive she is. I think the Chinball era had something special in terms of the way the TARDIS was depicted, and I loved it a lot. We never really get to see past the control room but it's a gorgeous control room! And throughout the era the TARDIS just feels so alive, it's always humming and beeping and chirping, I especially love the moments when the lights change color to match the doctors mood (mostly to blue, for sadness, sometimes red to yell at that dalek that one time). And speaking of the doctor, starting with ghost monument thirteen has a bunch of sweet moments of banter or just ~emotions~ with the TARDIS. I genuinely teared up a bit when she entrusted the timeless child memories to the TARDIS,and before her regeneration speech when she asked the TARDIS to look after her. Because who can she trust with her past AND her future except her oldest truest friend.

I could add a lot more of specific things from the era I love (solitract my beloved) but I think this is getting long enough as is lol.

[formulatrash]

That anon acting like being a journalist in motorsport is like being an executive in a capitalist establishment. 🤡 It’s like accusing a McDonalds crew member of being pro capitalism because they work in McDonalds. Like??? As if being treated poorly and paid dirt despite working your ass off everyday is not reason enough to he a socialist. I am a socialist precisely because of my experience as a worker in these filthy corporations! Clown anon!

you're absolutely right but a very large number of people in motorsport and the media are obviously very right wing. even when it's wildly against their own interests or totally in opposition to the concept of journalism or whatever.

especially in worlds like motorsport or the car industry. a lot of people don't like actually covering things, they enjoy being there. whether that's at the Frankfurt motor show or the Miami Grand Prix. and if your goal is just being there then you're willing to work for places where you do actively bad stuff because what you make was never the goal.

that's not how it's ever worked for me and this isn't meant to sound morally superior or whatever because honestly, get what you want i guess. but for me being in paddocks or factories or literally driving cars is so that I can write better pieces and find out more. the pass is to make the media, not the pieces a bartering chip for the pass.

in retrospect, some of that is why it was often pretty lonely. because I wasn't playing the same game as quite a lot of people. and it also makes the industry all the more exploitative because people want that lanyard so much they'll do anything for it.

I was thinking the other day that there's been almost no coverage of the investigation into F1 lobbying the EU and British government on behalf of Aramco, via synthetic fuel. It's a really damning link and I'm not just saying this because I'm quoted in the article but I would absolutely be writing about it if I still had somewhere to do it. it's a really shocking scandal, that F1 is helping hold up combustion car bans by contributing (unproven) information about synthetic fuels.

it's not the kind of thing F1 like people reporting. so suddenly all the men who self-style as hard-nosed business journalists in the paddock are being awfully quiet. because it is more important to still be there.

obviously, I am not still there. I did indeed criticise FE one too many times for their liking and fell out of favour. I am not a model for holding onto your pass. but there is also no point pretending that I could have acted differently just to keep it. anyway, this all turned into a bit of a ramble but turns out there's bad people kind of everywhere and often they're holding the controls.

I think that's part of what's upset me about the Watcher thing. these are guys who deliberately set out to make their own media company so they had that control to make things they were proud of, with the production values they wanted, under their own ownership, without having to fire people all the time. and you're asking them to be more like Buzzfeed? that was the bad old days, friends.

[altocat]

CW:

I noticed that one of the main themes of Sephiroth’s character is dehumanization.

It got me wondering, did he ever experience or deal with SA or harassment when under Shinra? R&D stuff or just the way he was paraded around like a public idol? How would he have handled this type of issue?

TWs below the cut just in case.

There's a lot of uncomfortable aspects about Sephiroth's history with Shinra. The way he's treated like a weapon. His fucked up conception. The fact that he was a child soldier who had apparently never really been around people at all before the age of 14.

One of the more understated bits is the very disturbing fixation that Hojo has on his own son. Silver Elite had the whole shampoo infodump of course, but the basic theme of Sephiroth's private "club" (which is RUN by Hojo) is emphasizing how attractive he is. Rebirth added extra grossness by having Hojo further expand on his idea of a hero needing to be "attractive" in order to be beloved by the populace. Whether intentional or not, especially when you take into account that Silver Elite has been around since Sephiroth was a child, it creates the idea of Hojo having some...less than wholesome perceptions about his son and who he needs to be. I'm not saying that Hojo has directly SA'd Sephiroth as I don't think Square is leaning into this idea. But bear in mind that Hojo is implied to be Sephiroth's personal caretaker and physician, on TOP of being his parent and in a position of authority over him. Hojo has access to Sephiroth's medical history, access to private information that no one else will ever have. And he dumps this information out for the public, with a special focus on how "attractive" and "beautiful" his son is.

At the end of the day, I think Hojo has sexually harassed Sephiroth throughout his life. We now have confirmation that he's physically and medically abused Sephiroth over the years. But the sheer presence of "Chairwoman H" coupled with Shinra buying INTO it and exploiting it to keep Sephiroth popular is just...really disconcerting. Sephiroth is completely indifferent to his fame and his fans, so he's not sanctioning this information. But the fact that he doesn't stop it either suggests that there is still a level of control and authority over him by Shinra's upper management. And keep in mind that they RAISED him. This is basically your "parent" violating you every single day of your life while you're also told to go out and kill people and also kill your friends while you're at it. And there's nothing you can really do about it because there's nowhere to go and no one to be. They are all you have, all you have ever known. You have to obey them, even when you absolutely despise them for what they're doing.

Sephiroth is responsible for so many reprehensible acts. But he is justified in hating Shinra for everything they did to him. And I think his reactions in canon are his own little way of getting back at what they did. Sure, Sephiroth has let go of a lot of his humanity. But what remains still seems to remember the people who made him what he was. And in destroying the planet, he destroys THEM as well.

[wishing-stones]

So those things that were a comfort in childhood and you now have an automatic response to those things?

My mom used to gently scratch my back or trail her nails over my back or back of my neck. She would sometimes do it a little when she walked past me if I was cooking. It’s an instant reaction where I just melt. Like immediate exhale and shoulder drop, dropping my head a little and closing my eyes. No matter what I’m doing, even if a friend does it at school I just melt and pause what I’m doing. It’s basically a sure fire way to get me to relax and chill out for a bit.

Who do you think would be the first to figure this out, and who do you think would take the most advantage of it? (And if you have the spoons, what do you think their reactions would be the first time they try this?)

You're in danger lmfao.

The first one to figure this out is probably either Dust or Axe, both of whom are incorrigible cuddlebugs. Axe is the one who does casual touches as he's walking by, so he may have found out this way as opposed to noticing you melting into a puddle while snuggled up. Cross might find out like this too, and Killer and Nightmare find out completely on accident. Killer sometimes likes to cup the backs of necks to announce his presence if he feels like being a menace, and he might drag his phalanges across skin when he pulls his hand away. Nightmare lets his touch linger a little as he pulls a hand away from your back. Baggs... could figure it out by having his hands laced behind your neck so this would definitely be in a more intimate setting than finding out by casual touch. He also wears gloves, which dulls the scratch a lot.

E v e r y o n e is going to abuse this. They think it's adorable, and some of them find it useful, if you're too stressed or wound up about something and need to chill out. Of course, they enjoy watching you relax and be comfortable with them too... and they'll probably enjoy a similar sensation if you return the favor. Killer, especially, enjoys this.

Killer finds out completely on accident, and if you're paying attention to his face while you melt into his fingers, he's surprised... and then that knowing smirk shows up. Your goose is cooked, he knows your weakness now and will exploit it any chance he gets. Dust figures it out by cuddling, and fortunately doesn't really abuse the privilege too much. He does it if he thinks you need to calm down or need the reassurance, and it's usually a thoughtless little gesture. If you're cuddled up with him, though, his hand won't leave the back of your neck. He likes the reaction, and watching you so comfortable with him. Axe finds out by accidental touch, but doubles down on it to see if... that was a one-off, or just something that you particularly enjoy. Like Dust, if you're cuddling with him, his hand is on the back of your neck. He'll also use it as a secondary sort of scruffing action if he needs to calm you down quickly or derail you. Cross only uses this if it's downtime or time to relax. His abuse of this usually comes coupled with nuzzles and sweet nothings, because it's cute, and seeing you all melty makes him pretty soft, too. He's an awful cuddlebug, and the comfier you are, the better. Baggs either watches it happen or figures out while cuddled up, and once he knows, it's over. If he feels like you need to chill our or relax a bit, it's almost more effective than his magic is. It's certainly faster and takes less effort. Similar to Killer, if you're paying attention, you can watch the realization dawn on him. Nightmare figures it out accidentally or deliberately, but once he knows, he'll use it to his advantage. He'll even use it as a sort of threat to calm down if he just... presses his index and thumb distal phalanges on an opposite side of your neck each, holding the back of your neck in between them, but not giving the scratch, just... holding it in kind of a pincer-like fashion. It's the nonverbal equivalent of "calm down, or I'll make you calm down." He also abuses this privilege because he thinks it's cute to watch.

[darlington-v]

going through tumblr for posts supporting shubble and what she went through, when it is mostly people talking about whether or not it was wilbur. like not many are actually talking about shubble or the shit she went through or how brave she is for talking about it, so i want to.

before i start, i'm not going to shy away from the fact that she is talking about wilbur. i as a third-party am able to call him out right where shubble isn't at liberty to. i'm not going to talk about him, though, which is the point. i want to focus on shubble.

that being said, the shit wilbur put them through was horrific. i really wish shubble the absolute best and i really think that she is so endlessly brave for going on stream to talk about this when they wouldn't know how the public would have reacted, and to share such a place of vulnerability to an audience. that's so hard and so scary, especially up against a public figure.

she said she felt like the bravest person in the world by telling her story, and she absolutely was.

shubble said that when she realized she was being abused she was so angry at herself. and when she talked about how it was just a slow incline of it getting worse and worse, it's so... i dont know shubble but i feel so deeply for her. because she wasn't stupid. she was choosing to believe the best in someone, over and over again and it is despicable for it to be exploited but it is nothing to be ashamed or feel stupid about. and i think her telling her story is just more evident of how big of a person, how courageous they are because like... them telling her story WILL help people. it helped me. it helped reassure me of my own experiences and it just really helped reinstate that like.

it's not crazy to be nice to someone, it's not crazy or bad to believe in the best in someone. and at the end of it, when you've been exploited, it's not your fault. and you're not wrong for prioritizing yourself and choosing yourself over them when you do leave. even if it feels small because it didn't feel violent enough, it didn't feel close enough to the image of abuse you had in your head. you're not crazy for choosing to leave a place or a person who hurts you.

wilbur soot hurt shubble repeatedly, he bit her to the point where she was bruising and he did it in front of their fucking friends. he showed the bruises off to their friends. it got to the point where he was biting her every fucking day, multiple times a day, and hurting her on purpose.

he took advantage of shubble and her kindness. he made her feel like she had to lie about what she was going through, was fine with keeping the relationship as bad as it was because of his own choices to not rise above and actually meet not just her emotionally, but his own emotions, and she was able to put herself above all of that and get out.

i'm really glad she's okay now, that she's had the opportunity to heal, and feels safe enough to talk about this and warn others not only of wilbur but also of how abuse can look in ways you don't expect it to.

here's an archive link to the vod. it's literally just 30 minutes long and i think it's a very important watch, theres a lot of really dangerous behavior from wilbur that she talks about that's important to know about. not only because it's important information about this individual, but it is important to know what abuse looks like and how it can feel so minor when you're in the middle of it until it gets to a breaking point.

i'm glad shubble had friends and resources who helped her feel like her experiences werent less than, were very real, because it helps solidify it not just for herself but also to everyone she can reach out to by talking about this.