#5 principles of lean

[autogyne-redacted]

Let's Talk About Security Culture: Why Keeping Secrets is Cool and Sexy

It's a natural impulse -- if you love crime -- to want to talk about how great it is. And if you hate America, it's only natural to want to share your dreams for its future with the rest of tumblr dot com. It can feel brave and transgressive. And there is a drive to share your soul with the world at the heart of social media. Surely I should be posting the most concrete implications of my politics, right? This is the poster's curse.

Security Culture refers to a set of "best practices" developed over the past several decades, largely (in a US context) coming out of radical environmental groups as they faced intense state repression, infiltration and entrapment. If you're not familiar, there's some fascinating crimethinc write ups to give you a window into that world:

Much of it boils down to: don't talk about crimes, past or forthcoming with people who don't need to know about them, and be mindful of the possibility of surveillance and infiltration. And, we can support each other as a community in minimizing risks, with an eye towards enabling bold action rather than getting bogged down in fears and anxieties. The guidelines that make sense for AG-based trouble-makers are different from the guidelines that make sense for posters, but plenty of common principles apply. To speak briefly to our position here as posters:

First, it bears saying that long term anonymity is extremely nearly impossible to maintain. Unless you've never accessed Tumblr without a vpn, and avoided connections with other ppl who can be associated with you/your location, and never shared pictures without scrubbing metadata, and a bunch of other 100% consistent steps, it's trivial for the state to know who you are.

Second, just because something isn't actively being prosecuted now doesn't mean it can't be prosecuted later. The priorities of the state change and a shift in power towards the right or a growth in radical action from the left can suddenly make it a priority to destroy anarchist networks or just find a few ppl to prosecute as examples (who probably weren't that plugged into larger networks before getting arrested. Advocating for specific anti-government crimes or declarations of intent to commit such crimes are likely prosecutable even if charges don't stick they're an easy vector for legal harassment.

Third, it's worth thinking about heat as separate from prosecutability. There are modes of engagement that may not be directly criminalized but signal that you are someone worth watching. Some people choose to be public in ways that make heat unavoidable. But it's worth noting that heat isn't strictly individualized, that it persists over time but also is going to shrink over time.

It's easy on here, ime, to see yourself as a proud member of the crime fandom but not much of a content creator. And it's easy to feel like you've generated an amount of heat where you're locked into that role. But heat you generated 10 years ago is probably pretty well gone. Heat you generated 5 years ago has faded substantially. It's worth thinking about how the world might shift in the coming years and what doors you want to keep open.

The non-individualized nature of heat also means that leaning into the spiciest of anti-state positions will make it a bad idea for people who are acting out those positions end up tied to you. Loudly talking about how "more people should be doing [X/Y/Z]" unfortunately sets you up to remain distant from people who might be doing or thinking about doing such things.

Which brings me back to: keeping secrets is sexy. Not spelling everything out builds intrigue. You can lay out a theoretical position and leave working out the practical implications of that as an exercise for the reader. There's value in opacity. The poster's curse and the drive to confess are extremely convenient for the state, but we can resist them. We can hold dreams in our hearts that we refuse to offer up to the posting spectacle.

[girlwithherheadinthestars]

academic rivals prompt list pt. 1

person a creeping up behind person b to lean over their shoulder to see their test score then person b detecting their presence and whirling around to hit them in the face with their calculator

alternatively, person a sees the test score and crows with laughter "HA I GOT .5 POINTS MORE THAN YOU" (also probably gets hit in the head with a calculator)

dead silence as they sit next to each other in class, not making eye contact, looking all business like.

person a: well well well.

person b: indeed

*le dramatic silence*

person a: did you study?

person b: oh not that much i just stayed up for 24 hours straight then summoned the spirit of heisenberg using voodoo dark arts to explain the uncertainty principle to me

person a: amateur i've been up for two days straight surviving on caffeine alone studying the material and the author of our textbook is tied up in my basement so i can ask him questions

person c doing better than both a and b on a test

a and b glaring at c

person a: they die.

person b: i have a shovel i'll bury the body

also, alternatively, person c starts making fun of b.

person a: *death glare* only i make fun of b. take a step back before i break your legs.

a and b go to study at the same library, not expecting to see each other, and then when they do they glare at each other from afar and sit on opposite ends of the table

and then they start stealing glances at each other

a loves hates the way b's brow scrunches up when they're confused, how they push up their glasses, how they sip their coffee

b loves hates it when a runs a hand through their hair in frustration, licks their finger to flip the page of a book, draws absentmindedly on their own hand to relax

when university acceptances come out, both of them get so stressed and open the application portals together, hugging each other and sobbing and then when they both get in they kiss in triumph and then when they come to, they jump back, blinking

*le sexual tension silence*

"that never happened"

"yup."

*awkward handshake*

"good job"

"yeah"

also, imagine person a checking their dream school application portal and not getting in.

b sees the look on a's face change and realizes.

they go over to them and wordlessly hug them, letting them cry into their shoulder

one of a and b's teachers being their literal parent

teacher: a, apologize for calling b an underachiever.

a: *grudgingly* sorry b

teacher: now b, apologize for calling a....what did you call them again?

b: *mutters* i called them thomson's model of the atom because it was incorrect and useless

teacher: yes. that. *sigh* apologize.

b: sorry a

teacher: now hug it out

a and b making disgusted faces

teacher: hug it out.

a and b: *awkward hug*

(the teacher is invited to their wedding)

part. 2

part. 3

[st4rymoon]

Guardian angel miguel 😳👀

🤫 guardian angel/stalker mig….

𝐏𝐫𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐨𝐫 ��𝘔𝘪𝘨𝘶𝘦𝘭 𝘖'𝘏𝘢𝘳𝘢 𝘹 𝘍𝘦𝘮 𝘙𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘦𝘳

- 18+, fluff, “guardian angel” Miguel but this is giving more stalkerish, book geeks, kissing, language, p in v, unprotected sex, rough Miguel, breeding kink, genetically made for each other <3, protective Miguel, lap fucking, BD Mig, oblivious reader, praise kink

Miguel always found you fascinating. Whether that be the way your sweet scent intoxicated him or the lack of self-awareness you had, it didn’t matter.

He was always on the sidelines, watching you from afar as you went about your day. He didn’t know why he took it upon himself to make sure nothing happened to you but he couldn’t help but worry about you after seeing you in his universe.

You were blissfully unaware of the ruby-red eyes that protected you as you walked out of your insufferable job. Miguel smiled as you bent down and pet a stray cat, watching you coo as the cat leaned into your palm.

Miguel’s eyes darted to a shadow walking towards you, eyes narrowing at the figure as it grew closer. You waved goodbye to the cat as you got up and made your way back home.

Still completely unaware of the fact that Miguel had a man wrapped in a choke hold in the alleyway a few steps away.

He made sure you got home safely, following behind you and making sure you locked the door.

That’s how most days went, Miguel would make sure you never got hurt but he never got too close.

Until he did.

You were scanning through the rows of books, about 5 books already in hand as you eagerly read through the spines of books. Miguel walked into the bookstore, eyes already in your direction as he walked through the aisles.

He was scanning through the science books, telling himself he might as well. Your eyes widened as you walked into the same section, stunned by the tall, brown-haired, Latino Ken doll right in front of you.

Your eyes darted down as he shot up. Miguel almost jumped at the sight of you standing at the end of the aisle with your head down low. He knew you were looking at him and he loved it.

You grabbed a few books on physics which caught Miguel’s eye. It was interesting to see Wuthering Heights and a book about psychics in the same pile together.

“Emily Brontë and Stephen Hawking in the same pile is something I thought I’d never see” Miguel spoke with a smile as he glared down at the books in your arms.

“Oh I- yeah, I mean why can’t I have a love for literature and science at once?” You chuckled “Hey I’m not judging, just an interesting pile” Miguel shrugged playfully.

“And you have… Principles of Biochemistry with some more chemistry books. Science lover, not much on the literature” you hummed as you took a look at the stack of books in his hands.

“Hey, I still love my classics, Frankenstein, The Great Gatsby, and Crime and Punishment. I’m not all science”

You laughed at the way he jokingly raised a hand in the air “Good to know” you smiled as you looked down at your feet.

“You got any book recommendations?” Miguel asked, trying his best to not pay too much attention to how he towered over you. “I always do, have you read the picture of Dorian Gray? It’s one of my favorites” You nodded as you made your way towards the section the book would be in.

Miguel followed close behind, mesmerized by your features and beauty that he couldn’t quite see from afar. “Here it is” You held the book out for him shakily as you used your chin to hold the rest of your books up “Thank you, here let me help” Miguel grabbed the books slipping from your grasp and carried them for you “you don’t have to, really it’s ok” you smiled as you felt a bit rude to make him carry your dozens of books.

“You sure? I don’t mind, it isn’t like I have much to carry” he shrugged “I’m about to pay so how about you just do me the favor of helping me with them to the counter”

Miguel eagerly agreed as he followed you upfront towards the counter. You chatted with Miguel as both of you paid and talked more about some of the books you picked out.

“This was nice” Miguel nodded as you stood outside the bookstore, bags in hand he smiled down at you “It was” you shyly smiled.

You felt like this was some sort of movie, a gorgeous polite man runs into you at a bookstore. What a dream.

“You know if you want any more book recommendations, I can always give you my number if you want some more” You were surprised by your boldness but you wouldn’t mind rejection from a stranger even if he was gorgeous.

“Sure” Miguel smiled, both of you swapping phone numbers with a glint of passion in both your eyes.

And after all of that, it led you to where you are now. Many dates, a few kisses, and hundreds of laughs later, you were straddled on his lap.

Miguel couldn’t believe he had you in his grasp. After years of making sure you were safe out of pure instinct, he was finally able to protect you and lose himself in your sweet kisses.

His hand cradled the back of your neck as the both of you hungrily pulled at each other's clothes. You moaned as you snaked your hand under his shirt, the warmth radiating off his whole body made you shiver.

Miguel let out a gruntled hum as you pulled his shirt over his head “Someone’s eager” he teased. You nodded in bliss, not caring for his teasing as he tossed your top somewhere behind him.

You could feel his bulging cock through his jeans and it was driving you crazy. You don’t know what’s gotten into you, you were grinding into his length in need. It felt like you’d die if he wasn’t buried inside.

Miguel felt the same, your scent filling every molecule of his body. He soon began to understand what it was that drove him so crazy about you, genetics.

You shaped perfectly in his arms, smelt like a dream, and kissed like an angel. He couldn’t help but protect you, watch you like your own guardian angel. You were his angel, his to protect, his to love.

You could feel your own body burning at the skin-to-skin contact “Please Miguel I need you” you whined. Your hips rubbed onto his lap eagerly, fucking yourself onto his lap as he hungrily yanked your skirt down your legs.

Hearing you beg was enough for him to lay you on your back and start pulling your panties down your legs. “Fuck” Miguel let out a moan at the sight of your back arching off the bed, pussy in full view as you held onto his arms.

“Please Mig” You were unbuttoning his jeans halfway before he slapped your hands out of the way. He couldn’t resist himself from being rough but you certainly didn’t mind it.

It turned you on seeing him so eager for you.

You whined at the sight of his cock springing out of his boxers. You clenched around nothing as you took in how big he was “It’ll fit, I’ll make it” Miguel hummed with a hand running your thigh in reassurance.

A raspy moan spilled from Miguel as he coats his cock with your slick, hips swaying and nudging your clit ever so slightly.

You gasped as with one swift motion, he rammed into your tight cunt. Your nails dug into his arms while Miguel let out a shaky groan as he steadied himself with his hands on your hips.

His pupils dilated at the glimpse of the bulge on your tummy, he slid in and out leisurely with a sly smile.

You mewled as he quickens his pace, his cock plunging deep inside you and stilling just to pull back and bury himself inside again.

“Oh- you have no fucking clue h- how long I’ve dreamed of this” Miguel hummed in his euphoric state. You nodded dumbly, as you squeezed around his cock. The vice grip of your cunt made him lose himself with each thrust “m- Miguel! Oh fu-“ you mewled out.

His thick fingers played with your messy clit, slow circles rubbing onto your throbbing clit. He smiled in accomplishment as you came around his length, your eyes rolled back in pure pleasure as Miguel continued his pace “Yeah, jus’ like that” Miguel purred as he buried himself into your neck.

His soft lips lapped and sucked onto your neck as he focused on your gushy walls throbbing around him. A loud groan spilled out of Miguel as he squeezes his eyes shut, mind going completely blank as he fucked his loads into you.

“You were f- fuck! Made for m- mhm” Miguel’s moans grew louder as he continued to fuck himself deeper into you.

When Miguel pulled out of you, his eyes were focused on your pretty face. You were completely fucked out, hair disheveled, and saliva all over your lips. He hummed at the sight of his cum leaking out of your tight hole “You look gorgeous” he cooed.

He laid beside you as he pulled you onto his chest, hand rubbing down your shoulder as you took a few breaths.

“You have no clue how much I love you” 







[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for not supporting my friend’s relationship?

(@aita mod I pinky promise that this is not an “aita for thinking/feeling something” submission, I’m just a long winded mf)

Okay this is admittedly stupid stupid dumb but it’s bothering the hell out of me so here we go. I (26X) have a friend (23NB) who recently got into a nice, stable(?) relationship after a string of messy short-term ones. They’ve been dating for ~2 months now, and the guy (early 30s?M) seems really nice and genuine. My friend is very happy and gushes about him constantly, which makes sense because the relationship is fairly new and their most recent previous relationships were with people who weren’t very open or communicative at all. I feel like the only valid reason I could possibly have to not like this dude is the age gap, which is more of a personal ick as I’m not really comfortable with dating anyone more than 5 years older/younger than me. They’re both adults and it’s their love life, so whatever.

The thing is, I just…do not share their enthusiasm for this guy. At all. He seems like a cool guy, but the fact that he’s dating my friend just isn’t jiving in my brain for whatever reason. I’m getting an inexplicable weird vibe. When I see a picture of them doing cute couple shit on instagram or wherever, my reaction isn’t “that’s adorable, I’m so happy for [friendname]!” or even “I’m glad they’re happy!” It’s more like “eugh, why are they doing that? I don’t want to see this.” This isn’t a normal reaction for me at all. I’m usually very supportive of my friends’ relationships as long as there are no obvious red flags. The only reason I can think of as to why I might be reacting this way is that an acquaintance of mine was pushing me to get with this same guy a couple years ago for NO REASON, and I was absolutely not interested, so it might be leftover discomfort from that. I don’t (consciously?) hold that against him though, that was 100% my acquaintance’s strange bullshit. I’m mostly into women and fem dudes, so there’s no latent attraction to my (masc leaning) friend or their bf involved either.

Here’s the part where I might be the asshole: because of my weird uncomfortable reaction to seeing this dude and my friend together, I haven’t been liking or commenting on posts/messages/etc about them being together or how wonderful this guy is. Social media interaction/validation is a big thing for them, and eventually they noticed that I wasn’t interacting with anything pertaining to their relationship. I don’t think I was obvious about it or anything, just operating on the “if you don’t have anything nice to say…” principle. Regardless, they asked me about it, and I went completely deer-in-the-headlights. I ended up saying something like “I just didn’t have anything to say about those posts, it’s not really my business” but I could tell they weren’t convinced. They asked me what I thought of the guy and I told them he seemed nice but I didn’t know him that well. I think that just made them more suspicious because I’ve been working for the same company as the guy for about 3 years now, but it is technically true. After my first few months I got transferred to a different department and haven’t seen him since.

They looked really disappointed and asked me if I could try to be a little more supportive of their relationship online, reminding me that this is “the first nice person [they’ve] dated in years” and that they “went through hell to find him.” (I think they were referring to their most recent breakups and exaggerating hardcore. They were messy, but I’ve heard every little detail about those relationships from them and they sounded like they ended due to plain old incompatibility/lack of interest. I would only call one of their recent exes “not a nice person.”) They ended the conversation by telling me that they trusted me and my approval was really important to them, which made me feel like shit, but it didn’t really make me see the relationship in a different light or anything. l definitely FEEL like an asshole, because even after they talked to me about it I have no plans to lie and act super into their boyfriend when I’m not. I realize how petty all of this sounds, but it’s obviously affecting my friend a lot, or else they wouldn’t have spoken to me about it in person. It just feels like I’d be an even worse friend if I started regularly lying to them about what I think of their relationship, even though I don’t have a valid reason for feeling the way I do. AITA?

What are these acronyms?

[illusoriess]

lestappen fic recs: an (ongoing) masterlist

here it finally is! because i promised!! a hopefully ongoing collection of my favorite lestappen fics, all on ao3.

LONG FICS (over 35k words)

Long Live (The Walls We Crashed Through) by Fabby | Explicit | 80.7k words

“What are you doing?” Charles asked, his voice cracking. Max blinked at him once before he smirked and said, “Well... I was going to kiss you.” “Why?” “Because I want to.” “Why?” Charles repeated, feeling like his legs were going to give out. “Is that not a good enough reason?” Max asked. OR: The childhood best friends to lovers fairy-tale-soulmates fic that nobody asked for. Charles has been in love with Max since he was seven years old.

I'm sure this one can go without saying since you all have probably read it, but it's a classic, and I'm including it on pure principle. This fic has it all.

2. Yours by loquarocoeur | Explicit | 53.9k words

Charles looks much too satisfied as Max leans back against the door, one eyebrow tugging up as he asks, “Do you want to fight?” “Of course I want to fight.” Charles only looks slightly amused. “Then fight.” "Stop fucking telling me what to do!" Max yells. Charles cocks his head. "What, because it turns you on?" Alternatively: Max doesn't want to like Charles, but Charles makes that really fucking difficult sometimes

To Bottom Max enjoyers, this will become your Bible if you haven't read it already. To tentative Max Bottom explorers, you will love this fic even if you never read Bottom Max again. But it might change your brain chemistry, so be careful.

3. half of a heaven by weiwuxian | Explicit | 38.9k words

“Good evening. I’m Charles,” he offers his hand, which Max takes and for a second, Charles thinks he’s going to kiss the back of it. Some muscle spasms in the tight grip, rough velvet against soft skin. When Charles gets his hand back, it feels like he lost a finger or two in the fight. “What’s your poison, Charles?” Max asks, settling on the barstool like it’s not designed to be the most uncomfortable chair in the world. “Cyanide, usually. I’ll settle for a gin tonic for now.” or: Charles is a supermodel that has learned everything he needs to make his world turn. Now, he has no idea what Max Verstappen wants from him.

charles' black cat energy is strong in this fic. and man's laden with issues. he's an eccentric supermodel and max is an f1 driver and big ol' simp. once again they're dumb, but they're lestappen, come on. fork found in kitchen.

4. give me that fire by Lady_Something | Explicit | 39.8k words

“Can you work with him?” Max has to take two drags of his cigarette before he can answer, and even then all he says is, “He knew I was the head chef, didn’t he.” Charles has to have known. Even if the news hadn’t reached him that Max had taken over as the head chef of Taureau Rouge, he would not have travelled all the way from Paris to London for an interview at a restaurant without knowing who he’d be working under. Still, Charles was the one who broke up with him. Max has to know, for sure. “He knows,” Christian confirms softly. “He outright laughed at me when I called and asked him to come work at one of my restaurants. It was only after I said it was Taureau Rouge, working with you, that he agreed to come.” Fuck. Fuck. Max could’ve gone his whole life without knowing that. He probably fucking should have, because how is he supposed to be normal about it? // Max and Charles have history, but it doesn't stop Charles from coming to work as Max's new sous chef. It does mean that everything changes for them both in the space of a single week.

Chef aus seem to be a trend in the f1 ficdom and I eat that shit up every time. This fic is no exception. Anyways they're so messy and flawed, it's beautiful

5. unwritten by NovaCloud | Teen and Up | 37.6k words

Reach for your dreams. Charles is trying, but it’s fucking hard. Falling in love with Max wasn’t part of his plans. Running away is easier, at least that way he won’t get hurt. Right? - Letting out a breathy laugh Charles shakes his head. He puts down the little shot glass and turns to Max, staring at him. “You spent my yearly pay check on me?" “I spent it on charity,” Max corrects him with a slight smirk as he casually leans against the bar. Charles wants to kiss it off his face. “I’m very concerned with wildlife conservation.” Charles snorts. “It’s for biodiversity.” “And that too, of course.” "You're insane, you know that?"

As someone in journalism I had to suspend my disbelief at some parts but that's honestly part of the charm tbh. Just silly, dramatic, fun, and cute. Plus billionaire Max is... yeah.

MEDIUM FICS (15k - 35k words)

straight lines (that unwind you) by 140445 | Explicit | 16.3k words

“Do you know him?” Arthur asks. “No,” Charles decides. Because he does not. He knows Max is a mathematics major, and that he plays chess. And that he hits the gym. And what he looks like when he comes. Details.

The tag "meet-cute but it's a meet-disaster" is used, which is accurate. A good mix of comedy but also heart-wrenching... sweetness? romance? they're both extremely stupid and extremely lestappen and it's just amazing. and great smut ofc.

2. home (is wherever I'm with you) by actparci | Not Rated | 17.9k

On the drive back to the hotel Max had turned to him, blue eyes fierce and piercing. “Promise me you won’t stop being angry. You’re angry because you know what you can do. Use it, control it, let it fuel you. Other people won’t understand but that doesn’t matter, you know what you’re capable of.” You and me, he’d seemed to say, we’re the same. Charles wonders now how he ever thought Max wouldn’t understand. Or: Charles leaves Ferrari, tries to win a championship, and learns some things about belonging. All the while, Max is there.

Another one you've all probably read. If I were to describe this fic in one word, it's "cathartic". Who needs therapy when you have Charles Fix It Fics???

3. kitty conundrum by linearity | Explicit | 18k words

Charles shows up to Monaco with kitty ears and a tail. Max is totally normal about it.

spoiler alert: he's not normal about it. thanks to some magical realism you get this almost-omegaverse-but-not-quite fic, and lestappen are just two horny idiots.

4. friday night; i'm in love by autumnapricot | General Audiences | 21k words

Charles hates Max. Well, not really—hate is probably far too big of a word for it. Max annoys Charles. Well, not really either, because Max doesn’t, like, do anything purposely to annoy Charles or goes out of his way or acts with ill intention, or whatever. At least he pretends like he doesn’t, so. Charles is annoyed by Max. Yes, that’s more like it. [Or—Max and Charles work together in an office, eight hours a day, five times a week. Strangely enough, it’s friday nights that bring them closer.]

They're so silly and sweet in this fic and I was endlessly endeared reading it. I'm a bitch for an office au, especially when it involves a ridiculous one-sided rivals to lovers.

5. even the sun sets in paradise by PrincessElectra | Teen and Up | 27.7k words

If he had to name the place where the story of Max and Charles began, if there was a moment that divided them into Before and After, there would be a few candidates. But there was only one correct answer. He would never forget the name. The place is called Val d’Argenton. Stories are still being written there. Charles likes to tell the story of the incident - turn by turn, infused with poetic drama, detailing every single emotion: frustration, anger, pure spite. Every time he tells it, his smile grows along with the laughter in his eyes, even as his words recount a tale of opposing emotions. “I never want to go back to Val d’Argenton,” Charles once confessed. “We’ll never go back there,” he promised, and Charles knew what he meant.

This fic is... everything <3 The hurt/comfort is just done so well; it gives meaning to the phrase "in sickness and in health." Their love is just written so beautifully.

SHORT FICS (under 15k words)

Cheating at Bingo and Other Christmas Traditions by WanderingBlindly | General Audiences | 12.4k words

"You know, there’s a very nice, very handsome young man in my neighborhood –” She starts back up, flagging down their waiter for another glass of wine. “Absolutely not,” He cuts her off with a dismissive wave of the hand. “Next topic.” “So you’re too good for him, is that it?” She sounds defensive, but her tone still has a mocking edge to it – emphasized by the quirk of her brows. Hardly holding back a groan, Charles tries to think of a way out of this. She’s like a cat, batting at him until he gives up, rolls over, and plays dead. “That’s not – I’m just busy, and it’s –” Or: Hallmark style fluff featuring an irritated Charles, a well-meaning Max, and the grandma that just wants them to kiss

Short and sweet, just pure fluff and Christmas joy. If you just want to read something nice and also pretend like it's Christmas in July, then this is the fic for you.

2. Clothes by Anonymous | Mature | 2.6k words

5 times Charles steals Max's clothes and the 1 time Max rips his clothes off of him.

cute domestic lestappen. they're adorable. that's all <3

3. Saturdays by NerdHerder12 | Teen and Up | 3.1k words

On Saturdays, Max visits Charles.

Proceed with caution. I feel physically ill after reading this fic and I really only read it when I want to hurt my own feelings. But it's so good.

4. And That's How I Foksmashed Dad's Championship Trophy by PrincessElectra | Teen and Up | 6.5k words

All of that would have been forgivable if not for the Green-Eyed Monster’s complete disregard for the pre-contracted occupation rights of Max’s lap. Such rights had long been pre-determined and belonged to Sassy (and occasionally to Jimmy, she admitted begrudgingly). However, no amount of quiet hisses and vicious glares seemed to penetrate the creature’s thick skull, and he would greedily occupy Max’s thigh for more than 95% of any given afternoon. Sometimes with his head, sometimes with his feet, and a few times he even straddled his entire body over Max; the latter could not have been comfortable for Max, as the Green-Eyed Monster was enormously overweight compared to Sassy. (Jimmy had insisted that it was not nice to shame another living creature about their weight, but she was not wrong. With her compact size and considerably more reasonable mass, Sassy was confident that she was much more comfortable for Max to have on his lap than that horrendously oversized creature.)

Another hit by PrincessElectra. The beauty of this fic is how hilarious but also fluffy it manages to be. Sassy needs to narrate all future lestappen fics, I don't make the rules

[skibasyndrome]

Wilmon + "there's another way I take my coffee actually"

disclaimer: this 100% Grape's fault and I refuse to take any responsibility 💜 (jk ily bestie and I know it's my fault for starting the vampire brain worms 💜💜💜)

cw: allusions to blood. vampire crack. coffee enjoyers everywhere please forgive me Wille

"There's another way I take my coffee actually." Simon, a carton of oat milk in one hand, Wille's favorite mug (filled about two thirds of the way with filter coffee) in the other, whips around towards Wille. "I beg your pardon?" "The coffee," Wille repeats slower, as if Simon not hearing him is the problem. "I also drink it another way," Wille says, cheerily kicking his legs while sitting on the kitchen counter. Except, no, no Wille doesn't drink his coffee any other way, because Wille is adorably annoyingly particular about the fact that he likes filter coffee only, that he discovered oat milk for himself five years ago and now won't have anything else, that he doesn't like sugar because sugar makes it too sweet (no, Simon doesn't get it, either). Simon painstakingly relearns Wille's coffee preferences every couple years so he can get the coffee just right for him every time. So no, unless Wille has secretly switched it up overnight, there is in fact no other way he drinks his coffee. When he keeps on staring at Wille, coffee and milk still raised in question, Wille waves his hand to beckon Simon over towards him. "I have no idea what you're saying," Simon tells him, but moves over nonetheless, coming to stand between Wille's legs. He sets the items down on either side of Wille, so he doesn't have to keep balancing them while Wille gets to have his cryptic moment. "You know...," Wille starts, slipping his arms around Simon's neck and pulling him closer, positioning Simon so that Wille can nuzzle his neck. But, no, Simon doesn't know. "I don't, actually," he says, but nonetheless leans into the kisses and nibbles Wille presses along the side of his neck. Wille whines a little and teases the skin with his canines. Simon huffs a laugh at the sudden shift in atmosphere. "How are you already hungry again, we just-," and then, horrifyingly, it dawns on him. He takes a step back, pushing Wille's arms off his shoulders. "No," he says firmly. "No fucking way are you saying what I think you're saying."

Wille just grins at him sheepishly and Simon loses all hope. He throws his head back and groans. He loves this man, but sometimes he gets some horrible ideas.

"You haven't even tried it!" Wille argues and Simon is about to lose his mind. "Have you?" He raises an eyebrow at Wille. "Who's the guy whose blood you're secretly sourcing for your abomination coffees and when do I get to meet him?"

Wille just laughs again, clearly getting a little bit flustered now. "We could try it though, right?" he asks, and if it weren't for Wille's puppy eyes Simon would not step back between his legs. But alas, those still haven't lost their charm, even centuries later. He sighs and puts bis hands on Wille's hips.

"You can try it, if you feel like you have to," and now Simon is laughing, too. "But I have some principles."

Wille snorts at that, before pulling Simon in again and gently sinking his teeth into his neck.

aoksjsjsjsjsjenskawksma. Hope it was worth the wait 💀💜 Thanks for sending me this prompt and also for always providing very important and valuable discussions around vampire nutrition 💜💜💜

There are some more (less lighthearted) vampire snippets here and here

Send me "Wilmon" + a sentence and I'll write you 5(+) more!

[tea-and-secrets]

I've been on SSRIs for about a year and while it's great that I'm not as depressed and less socially anxious it has taken a steel pipe to my sex drive. it's really annoying. I can cum, it just takes a really long time and it feels like 25% as good.

A couple weeks ago, I started jerking off mostly bc I was bored at around 9 pm. About half an hour goes by and I'm like huh this is taking even longer than usual. and then time keeps passing and now it's been hours and I'm not even really that horny mentally anymore but I'm just really annoyed sick of prozac's shit and like it's about the principle now. I am not going to bed until I cum.

it ended up taking until 2 in the morning. It was only slightly better than usual, considering I just unintentionally edged for 5 hours straight. I'm laying there in lucidity, my hands are pruny, I'm sweaty enough that the fitted sheet below me is damp, my phone is nearly dead for the third time, and there is a small headache brewing. I decide to go to the bathroom.

I stand up and make it about halfway to the door before I get that low-iron-like wooziness. my vision starts to blur,and everything sounds muffled save for a loud ringing. I'm like oh ok I'll just brace myself for a bit so I lean against the wall. My vision goes completely and then I hear a distant thud. It took me a minute to put together that I had passed out and fallen completely flat on my face onto the floor, just like tipped forward like a cartoon, shaking the whole house at 2 in the morning. I hang out face down on the floor processing this for a bit before sheepishly getting up and going to the bathroom and washing my hands and stuff. I live with my parents so if the loud crash had woken them up I could have had to explain myself but thankfully it did not lol. I think I just fainted because my heart rate was so high for so long and I was also most likely not drinking enough water

so yeah that's the story of how I once jacked off so hard I passed out ✌️

.

[petrified-aspen]

there is a common misconception that our marginalized identities act as a sort of Shield of Principle™ or whatever, that prevents us from having fascist or racist leanings. but there are inconceivably (and subliminally) powerful forces that do the exact opposite, systems of white supremacy, cisheteronormavity, and class that galvanize us and our identities against one another.

There are examples of this everywhere; entire tomes have been written on it. But lately, I am noticing a particularly worsening problem among a lot of people in my Jewish communities. Aimless, usually incomprehensible vitriol sprayed at nebulously-defined "pro-palestine leftists", trying to paint them all as jihadists, religious fundamentalists, anti-Semitic.

It seems almost deliberate, scrolling through some of these tags, and watching the rhetoric evolve. First, someone finds an incredibly-specific, cherry-picked representation of something indefensible, either on the grounds of it being unproductive, or on the grounds of it being actual violent bigotry. It's usually the same 4 or 5 things, re-posted across thousands of blogs. What was once a shitty cardboard sign that, often times, was at a protest for all of 30 minutes before it was destroyed, or before the protest organizers removed it and denounced it at teach-ins and meetings, is now permanently saved on thousands of Tumblr blogs. What was once an easily-identifiable and fixable problem becomes a gut-punch that steels thousands of anxious, scared groups in preparation for violence.

These 4 or 5 gut-punches then get surrounded by the more on-the-fence statements. They are statements that, in my experiences having worked with pro-Palestinian demonstrators at 2 universities, are well-intentioned, but filled with pain, grief, and sometimes, anger. These statements challenge the validity of Israel as a state, or attempt to appeal to a mutual sorrow and grief by imploring people to learn from the Holocaust.

But chances are, as you came across that post, you're recovering from the violent, inflammatory post from earlier. And so your eyes see the same green, red and black colors, and you feel the upwell of emotion behind it, and by pattern-recognition alone, you're more likely to take it in bad faith. To assume that this person wants the safety of all Jews to disappear along with the Israeli state, rather than understand their ideological opposition to any state that thrives at the expense of the colonized. To conclude that they are co-opting your family's tragedy rather than recognizing that the same rhetoric, the same tactics, are being used to justify more death, according to actual Holocaust scholars.

Then it devolves even further, with completely benign statements, like "From the River to the Sea", a slogan that has been used to represent Palestinian-Jewish solidarity since before Hamas even existed, being received as though it's the 14 Words or some shit.

This is how communities manufacture outrage that only hurts us in the long run. Yes, the person who held up a sign saying "carpet bomb Tel Aviv" is wrong and they should be removed immediately. But when someone shows you that sign, then shows you a sign calling for solidarity between ethnic groups, and they try to tell you that those two are the same, that person is lying to you.

There's a very specific reason why a nebulously-defined "left-wing" is so often the first target of this manufactured outrage; because leftists have been historically united by ideals of solidarity, mutual aid, and community support and defense. To a regime built on imperial power--be that the U.S. regime, the Third Reich, whatever--nothing is scarier than that. By attacking the solidarity between the people you want to keep in line, you ensure that you will have fewer enemies should some of them have doubts about keeping in lock-step with their own oppression. This was the reason behind the Red Scare, and it was a key step in fascist Italy and Germany as well.

Our identities alone are not a bulwark against fascism. Our best tool to lead our communities forward is solidarity, and with that comes communicating, listening, and reflecting.

[cafeseoulmate]

Why We (Don’t) Work

i'm okay with being by your side for as long as i can hide what if i told you that i've fallen?

featuring: music major!beomgyu x fine arts major!gn!reader

genre: fluff, angst, childhood best friends to lovers, neighbors to lovers au, idiots to lovers au, high school au, college au, band au, hurt/comfort, slice of life, slowburn, mutual pining, 5+1 & nonlinear format

wc: 13k

warnings and other notes: cursing, alcohol consumption, reader is implied bi/pan, two jokes about murder, mention of the flu, brief mention of making out, cliches, inaccurate portrayal of a painting & sculpture double major, idk where this was going tbh

I. WE'VE BEEN FRIENDS FOR TOO LONG

The idea of friends eventually becoming lovers, especially those who have known each other for a long time, is okay in your opinion. In theory, the principle of falling in love with someone whom you've previously built a relationship with is not that great but not that awful either.

It's reasonable, practical and natural even in many situations. You would know from the amount of friends you've watched over the years who only started seeing each other romantically after a few years of getting to know and being comfortable around each other platonically.

You just figure that it's not for you and Choi Beomgyu, the nuisance who's been affectionately stuck to your hip since your days at the neighborhood playground.

For starters, you've known him for far too long. Not that love is supposed to have an expiration date, it's just that most people who start off friends—like your college friends Yeji and Ryujin who started dating before your junior year—usually take less than a decade, and that is really pushing it in your humble opinion.

Beomgyu's known you since the time you were sporting bowl cuts your mom fashioned with your kitchen scissors, probably and unconsciously even longer than that given that your respective moms have also been close friends since you were toddlers. You've pushed each other at the swings and the slides more than any of your other childhood friends, have gone to the same schools together spent most of your non-holidays with each other since kindergarten, and even live in the same university dorm at the present.

You both had almost 16 years to bring up anything remotely close to romantic feelings with each other and the closest to romantic-leaning affection that you got from him was the time he gave you a bouquet of roses, and he didn't even buy it for you originally.

It was in your 10th grade, when Valentine's Day gifts have finally reached normal status among the consciousness of your teen peers. Since Halloween, Beomgyu had been saving up his money to buy Yeeun from Class 4 a bouquet of roses—bribing you to pay for his lunch two out of five days in the week, singing and dancing his ass off at his family's Christmas and Lunar New Year parties for money, and working the afternoon shift at the neighborhood guitar store—only to chicken out at the last minute because Jaehyun from Class 6 had asked Yeeun to be his girlfriend in a very public proposal at the soccer field.

In a small class reunion last Christmas, Taehyun had asked about the whole ordeal, supported by the drunk cheerings of your former classmates at the memory of Beomgyu handing you the abnormally large bouquet by the school gate during dismissal almost five years ago.

"What else do you want to know about that?" You asked with a frown, feeling light-headed from all the barbecue and soju yourself. It was finals week for most of you as well, somehow making all the shots of peach-flavored alcohol taste sweeter and the stories bitterer. "You all know how it went: Gyu chickened out and didn't want to waste his hard-earned money on a girl who got a boyfriend that same day so he gave it to me before we went home."

"You also gave me half of the money to buy it! That's also an important detail!" Beomgyu slurred out to your right, leaning his head on your arm with a giggle and making you roll your eyes. "I thought, 'ya, this person bought me lunch for three months they kind of bought this bouquet so I'll just give it to them. That's only fair!'"

Yunjin raised a finger this time, as if making a shushing motion in the air as she took a long sip of her soju bottle across the table. "Okay but!" She exclaimed after slamming her bottle down, momentarily covering her mouth as she hiccuped before continuing. "You...you could've just gave it to your mom or something!"

"Auntie's allergic to flowers." You pointed out. "My dad also forgot to buy my mom flowers that time so I gave it to him when I got home. I technically saved two lives that day.”

"So it didn't spark anything?" Jeongin pointed to you then to Beomgyu who was contemplating on falling asleep on you by that point, clearly uninterested in this conversation you've had with the rest of the world a million times already. "Not even a little bit?"

Of course there were times over the years, at least on your part—moments where Beomgyu spent an hour too long in your childhood home when he just told you that his parents wanted him to come home at a certain time, filled a day with questionably sweet gestures only to bribe you with trouble after, or comforted you too well in your darkest moments among others that made your heart flutter more than it's supposed to.

You never told anyone about how on that day, you plucked out a single rose from the bouquet before secretly handing it to your dad as he cooked a quick Valentine's Day dinner for your mom. There was no denying that, even if he gave it to you under pitiful circumstances, it was still a sweet gesture. After Yeeun, he thought of giving it to you, the next immediate person and his best friend.

The red rose drank fresh water by your windowsill for three days until Beomgyu invited himself over for a cram session when you ended up hiding the flower shamefully under your bed and convincing yourself that you were just momentarily blinded by the principle of the gesture.

Though it accidentally wilted after you've forgotten about it amidst your busy high school schedule, you still keep the petals in a box under your bed as a reminder of all those moments you've thought you were starting to feel something for your best friend, only to snap yourself out of it after. You even had one of the petals made into a resin necklace by Yeji when she picked up on the hobby, wearing it everyday since without Beomgyu ever asking about it’s significance.

He just thinks you got it from the congratulatory bouquet the boys all pitched in to give when you won a sculpting competition at the university museum.

But as mentioned, you've mostly come to terms with the fact that you've known Beomgyu long enough to let a lot of opportunities to pass by, even if it pains you. Though romantic love doesn’t have to have an expiration date, you think you’ve been around your best friend long enough to know and accept that nothing is going to happen.

So to keep up appearances, you shook your head in front of your demanding friends that night at the reunion and teasingly pushed the sleeping Beomgyu to Taehyun's shoulder, much to everyone's disappointment.

"I've known him for all my life, literally. If something remotely romantic were to happen, it should've happened years ago." You grimaced before downing another shot of peach soju, that particular shot stinging a bit too much for your liking.

"But that's, like, the tricky thing with friends: you never really know when things are starting to be something else with one or both people." Sieun pointed out with a pout.

"Oh, I can assure you, it's not like that with us." You waved your hand dismissively in response before quickly going back to gathering your next mouthful of lettuce wrap. “Anyway, you guys have known us pretty well too. We just don’t match that way.”

Next to you, Beomgyu groaned seemingly in agreement as he stirred on Taehyun's shoulder, moving to lean on you again. "You're all so fucking noisy." He mumbled on the nook of your neck, hands encircling around your waist as he then pointed at the jug of water on the table. “If Y/N says it's not like that then it's not like that. So let me sleep and let Y/N eat their food!"

You shrugged at Sieun and Yunjin, smoothly shifting the conversation's focus to Sieun after before filling in a glass of water for Beomgyu as he’s requested.

"You're going to have a nasty hangover later, you know." You pointed out to him, making sure to keep your voice low knowing that he's sensitive to noise when he's drunk.

"You'll take care of me." He replied confidently with a boyish grin, more as a statement than a question. "Can I sleep over your dorm later? Hyuka won't let me in the room like this and Ryujin's already on vacation anyway."

You then rolled your eyes, knowing full well that you don’t have a choice anyway. "Sure, sure."

II. WE HAVE SHIT TASTE IN PEOPLE (AND IT WOULD BE AN INSULT TO OURSELVES IF WE START LIKING EACH OTHER)

The first time someone directly and publicly questioned Beomgyu's relationship with you, however, was at the traditional secret gathering your classmates had arranged in your two-day senior retreat just four years ago. On that night, after a whole day of tedious team-building activities and an evening of getting lectured by your teachers on house rules, most of Class 2 gathered at the boys' shared room for swiped alcohol and midnight snacks.

At that time, it was Daehwi who had asked and the context was the equally traditional game of truth or dare. When Beomgyu was picked for the second time that night, he surprisingly chose truth, prompting the question everyone has apparently been asking among themselves.

"Would you date Y/N?"

Beomgyu laughed. It was always his instinct to laugh whenever his own relatives asked the same question or when you would tell your own similar experiences but also because he saw you throwing your head back in laughter as well from where you were seated between Yunjin and Ryujin.

But what really solidifies this question as an inside joke between the two of you was the time when you watched When Harry Met Sally together at a sleepover in Beomgyu's house a year before the class retreat.

It was the classic friends to lovers romcom that you ended up watching in that particular sleepover in the first place because Yunjin mentioned that it reminded her of you and Beomgyu. So of course it had to be brought up before you could accidentally fall asleep on Beomgyu that night, you pointing to Billy Crystal and Meg Ryan before smacking Beomgyu in the head and asking the exact same question the boy would face at the senior retreat.

"Without thinking about all the gross couple shit like kissing or whatever," You gagged between your question, making Beomgyu roll his eyes and scoff. "would you date me?"

"First of all: gross—"

"That's why I said without all the couple stuff!"

"Still gross! Why would you think of that question!"

Back to the class retreat, once Beomgyu had calmed down from laughing and before Jeongin or Hueningkai could start leading the teasing on how you and your best friend reacted to the question in the same way at the same time, he said, "Y/N has shit taste in people. It'd be an insult to myself if they start liking me, even more if we do date."

You laughed even harder, repeating the words back to him. "Ya, you have shit taste in people too!"

Daehwi almost did a whole spit take with his glass of Cola while hearing your exchange. "Damn, you two are brutal with each other!"

Taehyun told Beomgyu later on that he felt as if that particular answer could be misinterpreted as the latter being mean to you. But your best friend was quick to explain that it's something you actually talked about in the aforementioned sleepover. You also backed him up on this over breakfast the next day when you sat with the two boys.

On the night of your sleepover, after you asked the question and Beomgyu was done making his teasing disgusted faces in front of you, he had said the exact same words for the first time and even elaborated on it.

And like Daehwi, you also almost did a spit take hearing it for the first time but your own glass of hot chocolate.

"You had a crush on Yeonjun two years ago before he was cool and you dated that annoying what's-her-name from the softball team who, by the way, cheated on you before you could even celebrate 100 days." The blunt 11th-grader Beomgyu said in front of your surprised face on that sleepover. "Ah, and don't get me started on that time you were swooning over that asshole Taejoon from Class 7 last semester because he sat next to you on the bus when I got the flu? You were crushing on a guy who thought he was jack shit and played with a lot of girls while I was almost dying in the hospital! Shit taste and inconsiderate!"

You and Beomgyu also did not forget to mention to Taehyun about how you almost smothered Beomgyu to death with a pillow in response, pausing the movie so Meg Ryan didn't have to see the crime you were about to do before tackling your best friend on the bed.

"Hey, Yeonjun's cool and Minji from softball really is an asshole but I didn't know Taejoon had a reputation in Class 7 back then! I just thought he was cute and really polite to the old ladies and the kids on the bus!" You retorted aggressively, smacking Beomgyu's face repeatedly with the Hello Kitty pillow he lent you for that night. "And I visited you with the boys and Yunjin after school while you were sick to catch you up in class, you ungrateful brat! I have shit taste but I'll never be inconsiderate to you!

"While we're at it, you also have shit taste, mind you! Pining after girls like Yeeun and Rina right when they start dating other people! Ah, and you dated that girl, Areum, in the 9th grade too even when everyone kept telling you that she was trying to get to Soobin through you! Shit taste and idiotic!"

Your college years would not spare the both of you from having more strings of failed romantic relationships just as much as it did not stop all the questions from friends, both new and old, about Beomgyu's relationship with you so the answer always remained the same: both of you have shit taste in people so dating each other would be somehow insults to yourselves.

But there are times, of course, when it would just be you and Beomgyu alone and, instead of the usual jokes and banter, he allows himself to be just slightly honest for the sake of his sanity and to make sure that you never feel as if he has some hidden ill-intent in always jokingly bringing up the uglier sides of your dating history.

In another sleepover at his house last summer, he didn't fight you when you decide on watching My Best Friend's Wedding and blurted out halfway, "As your own best friend, I think you deserve the best."

Though no one did a spit take this time, you did momentarily freeze while trying to tuck yourself in under the weighted blanket you were sharing. On his laptop perched comfortably on a foldable table, the movie was coincidentally at the part where Julia Roberts was delivering the iconic, "Choose Me” speech.

“I'll have to say this quick or I'm just going to have this massive coronary and then you'll never hear it and.....and....you have to. This is, by far the dumbest thing I've ever done in my entire life.” Julia Roberts dramatically delivered on the laptop screen as if filling in the silence. “Ugh—so dumb in fact—uh—that I can't...... oh but I'm gonna.”

“What’s wrong?” Her male lead, Dermont Mulroney, asked and Beomgyu felt like he should be asking that question to you when your silence started dragging on for too long.

When you did regain your composure, you chuckled nervously. "I-I mean yeah, I know, but...what's with that all of a sudden?" You furrowed your brows up at him.

And like he was mirroring you, Beomgyu also paused for a moment as he too contemplated on why he said it out of nowhere.

Meanwhile, Julia Roberts just continued delivering her lines flawlessly, filling in the silence between the two of you. “Michael......I love you. I've loved you for nine years. I've just been too arrogant and scared to realize it and, well, now I'm just scared. So I, I......realize that this comes at a very inopportune time. But I really have this gigantic favor to ask of you.” Though the sound coming in on your respective earphones was only at 75%, suddenly it felt louder the longer that Beomgyu didn't speak. “Choose me? Marry me. Let me make you happy.”

Beomgyu scratched the nape of his neck and smiled sheepishly, turning away for a second as you finally pause the movie and the light illuminates the side of his face a little too brightly.

“Oh God, please don’t tell me you’re gonna pull a Julia Roberts right now. You know—“

“What? No!"

“Then answer the question!”

"I just remembered, you know, how we always say that we won't date each other because we both have shitty taste in people and everything." He shrugged when he did explain himself, unconsciously sinking lower on the bed as he pressed his back harder on the bed frame behind you. "And I know it's a joke and all but I—I also think that you deserve better than someone like me...or Yeonjun, Soobin, Tae, and Hyuka.

“Though I guess it is hard to find someone better than us, especially me and Soobin, I think you should still look for someone who’s really kind, smart, and will never give you a hard time. You deserve someone who looks out for you and makes you feel like home but also like you’re flying.

“Someone who’s funny too but not too funny to upstage me! Just enough to get you through the dark times because you do get really stressed out these days. I—I don’t know, I guess I was just thinking about—about that, yeah…”

You relaxed your expression as he spoke, though a small pout remained. "Okay..." You pressed play on the laptop again with a laugh. "Random but okay.”

“I give my whole heart out to you in a speech and that’s all you have to say?”

“What else do you want me to say?” You scoffed and playfully nudged him away, earning you a dramatic wince from him. "With how you generally act around people I like, it's not that hard to figure out that it's because you think this way."

“Yeah but, I don’t know, maybe say it back to me too and comfort my lonely, lonely heart?” He rolled his eyes and crossed his arms in response.

“I think that’s a you problem. We all tell you to just get yourself out there then you reject every person who throws themself at you.”

The boy feigned a glare next. “I’m going to kill you in your sleep later.”

“Fine.” You rolled your eyes, moving carefully on the bed to face him fully. “You deserve someone infinitely better than me too. Someone gorgeous—not just pretty!—and smart enough to keep your dumbass in check and just overall awesome, but not too awesome, of course! I’m literally the coolest person you’ll ever meet…ever!”

"Oh you flatter me, Y/N!" He exclaimed dramatically with his hands to his chest, smiling when you snorted and turned your attention back to the laptop again to press play on the movie.

Though he partly thinks otherwise—that it’s impossible that there’s someone out there infinitely better than you overall—he does agree that you are the coolest person in his life.

"You're so annoying." You mumbled under your breath and he quickly retaliated by pinching your cheek affectionately. "Ya!"

"You love me."

"I know right, how will I even find someone better than you?" You teased but Beomgyu's observant enough to understand that you only mean it halfway.

"Maybe you won't?" He teased back with a wink. "I know for sure no one's better than you."

"Shut up."

III. WE ARE EXTREME OPPOSITES (AND WE ANNOY EACH OTHER A LOT)

If you were to be asked about the things that annoy you about Beomgyu and vice versa, you both would probably need a month of preparation and a year each just to list everything you've come up with. Sure, you’ve known each other for a long enough time to be comfortable in each other’s presence but that doesn’t make everyday perfect as there are still instances when you get the undeniable urge to smack him in the head or dropkick him for being insufferable.

If you were to make a top five shortlist, however, the fact that Beomgyu has no concept of personal space when it comes to you would take the cake—pinching your cheeks, holding your hand whenever a remotely attractive person passes you by, always putting his legs on top of yours, hugging you to death, and always headlocking you when you meet up among others.

But beyond that, ever since he got comfortable with initiating skinship with you around the 3rd grade, he's also somehow managed to convince himself that he had the right to be all up in your personal business too even when you didn't want him to—from simple things like stealing your food, spamming you with messages the second you don't reply as quickly as he'd like, to always having insisting that he accompanies you whenever you mention going to a new place, online stalking anyone you find interesting, randomly popping up at the studio in the Fine Arts department, and loosely keeping tabs on people you hang out with.

There have been times, however, when Beomgyu’s nosiness has actually saved you from a date or unwanted attention in public and even comforted you. In elementary and high school, whenever you’re allowed to pick groupmates, he’s always ready with gossip about everyone’s work ethic for some reason. Whenever a creep at the mall or at a party would try to hit on you, he’s always by your side ready with a glare and all intent to report the creep to the authorities. And even when he’s a shit drunk, he’s always aware enough to defend you whenever your friends pick on you.

But more importantly, as the more reserved person between the two of you, Beomgyu’s always the one who’s forcing you to open up to at least one person when you’re down (aka him).

The first sleepover that the two of you ever had was in the 6th grade when Beomgyu invited himself over to your house and stayed up with you until 3 AM to finish a Science project your three other groupmates basically gave up on. You never asked him to do it, just complained about it over lunch once, then suddenly he was barging in your house with his own stationary and your Science teacher already notified of how your groupmates have been slacking the past two weeks.

“Why did you do that?” You pouted after turning in your finished paper online. Fortunately for the two of you that time, it was a Friday and sleeping in wasn’t going to be an issue, especially for 6th grader Beomgyu who had the tendency to sleep the whole day. “I could’ve just told Mrs. Kim on Monday myself.”

Beomgyu shrugged as he fluffed the pillows and arranged your plushies on the bed. He hasn’t had his sudden growth spurt at that time so fitting in your old bed frame was still fairly easy then. “Knowing you and how long your groupmates have been bailing on you, you’d probably chicken out if Yunjin or I don’t do it ourselves or push you to do it.”

“No—“

“You know I’m right.“

You glared at him then, standing up from your desk to punch his arm. “I hate you.”

But he only rolled his eyes. “Then next time, I’ll try to not meddle that much anymore. Just…when our classmates are taking advantage of your kindness like this again, report it immediately, okay?” He nagged, his voice soft while his expression was determined. “Even if you don’t tell me directly, I know you’ve been having a hard time with that even more this year for some reason and, knowing you, you’d rather suck it up because you think you’re bothering people when you bring it up when you’re not.”

“That’s not true.”

“Y/N.” He squinted his eyes and pursed his lips.

You scoffed, climbing in the bed and laying down on the side next to the wall. “Okay, maybe sometimes it’s true.”

“Y/N.” He repeated your name in the same tone, lying next to you with your teddy bear in his arms. "Ms. Fluffy doesn't think so and I kind of agree with her."

You rolled your eyes in response, Beomgyu catching the gesture before he could turn off your bedside lamp. “Fine, fine. I admit it, I wasn’t—I wasn’t planning to tell Mrs. Kim because I thought my groupmates would get mad and think of me as a nuisance.” You winced at the admission, lifting your blanket up to your nose.

But Beomgyu was quick to stop your hand, flicking your forehead after. “Stop doing that. You literally did half of your paper, even the parts you weren’t assigned to. You’re far from a nuisance.” He retorted, tucking Ms. Fluffy the teddy bear next to you. “And Mrs. Kim’s job is literally to make sure we’re not having a hard time learning, she’d understand.”

That time, and most times when Beomgyu would be the one nagging you, you felt like shrinking under his fierce gaze. “I don’t want to get into trouble with anyone in class—“

“I’d fight anyone off for you if that happens."

“But I can handle myself if ever!”

“Now, you’re just contradicting yourself.” He pointed out with a chuckle, settling down next to you. “Just...next time, okay? You should never suffer in silence by choice, you’re better than that.”

You had no choice but to nod in agreement and fulfill your promise that very next Monday, talking to Mrs. Kim yourself to elaborate on the incident further with Beomgyu holding your hand the entire time.

Most of the time, it's sweet and thoughtful that your best friend looks out for you out of genuine concern. You can’t admit it to his face, knowing he’ll tease you endlessly for it, but you like Beomgyu having his full attention on you most of the time and how he can literally rival your family as the person who knows you best.

But alas, there are still numerous instances when it's caused you more harm than good to disastrous levels.

At the top of your head, there was that incident in the summer before your sophomore year when Yeji first set you up on a blind date with Theo, a friend of a friend from the Vocal Performance department.

You even made sure that Beomgyu wouldn't get anywhere near your bowling date, threatening all of your mutual friends to keep the agenda a secret over message (and free food for Taehyun and Hueningkai) and scheduling the date on the same weekend Beomgyu was going to take an exam for one of his summer classes.

However, when Theo briefly left you alone in your lane to buy snacks, a familiar mop of brown hair, black hoodie, and a pair of thick-rimmed glasses suddenly whooshed in your peripheral vision, followed by two figures in hoodies you unmasked at the end of the night as Yeonjun and Soobin.

Another annoying thing that Beomgyu does is that when he’s “investigating” something—whether it’s a friend’s date or that time everyone thought Taehyun was secretly seeing someone—he always brings the same get-up of hoodie and thick-rimmed glasses along as "disguise." It's a stupid idea that first came to him when Yunjin went on her very first date in high school that he never bothered to change even when everyone started catching on, making it easier to spot him in your surroundings.

Though he didn't approach you until you approached him back in your dorms, it was still unnerving to spot him, Yeonjun, and Soobin playing five lanes away from you and your date. Their glances felt heavy on your back as the night went on.

"He was literally in two of your classes last semester. It's not like he's some stranger to you." You frowned at Beomgyu after letting Yeonjun and Soobin go with an earful of a speech of their own. Though you and Theo agreed that you clicked better as friends, you still lectured and nagged at your three friends in your dorm's communal kitchen with Beomgyu staying an hour longer than the other two. "How did you even get to the bowling alley? I thought you have an exam tonight?"

"My exam was only until 7 PM so I got Yeonjun to drive us to the bowling alley as soon as I got out. It was a celebratory thing for me too! That English final really kicked me in the ass, if you must know." Beomgyu answered with a pout, hands deep in his hoodie pockets and his glasses slipping on his nose. "And even if I do know Theo in passing, I don't know him that way. He’s more Yeji’s friend than mine. What if he was a shit dude when it comes to dates? What if he stood you up tonight or something?"

"You say that for all the people I like."

Beomgyu waved his hand dismissively in defense. "I only say that to the objectively trashy ones and the ones I don’t know enough about. Theo’s under the second category.”

"Still! You get what I mean!" You frowned as you smacked him on the back of his head, earning you a wince from him. "Gyu, once, just one date where you leave me alone. No disguises and no spam texts. Can you do that?"

There's a long pause that followed after with Beomgyu opening his mouth a couple of times only to close it back again, keeping you on edge for what felt like forever but was only for around five minutes.

He never told you what he was going to say at first or if he was even thinking of something else to say, you can just easily infer that it's different from what he actually ended up saying with the way his expression softened right before he finally spoke.

"Only if you tell me more about these things before you actually go on them. Even just the basic things are fine.” He frowned this time, crossing his arms. Even without you scanning every inch of his face, his expression easily gave away to the fact that he was thinking of saying something else but was trying his best to hold back. “I’m...I'm worried, okay? I don’t want you getting in trouble.”

"You know I can handle myself. We've been through this hundreds of times, I'm not that kid from the 4th grade who couldn't tell on my shit groupmates." You interjected, crossing your arms in front of the taller boy. "Anyway, if I ever need help, you're always the first one I'll call, you already know that."

He pouted down at you. "Sure?"

And you nodded with a laugh at his ridiculous expression, uncrossing your arms as you couldn't fight the amusement creeping up on you whenever Beomgyu tries to act cute anymore. "Positive."

So on the next two blind dates that Yeji set up for you that summer, you were pretty sure that Beomgyu only kept tabs on you through text as the hoodie and glasses were nowhere to be seen when you and your dates went out.

♡

On Beomgyu’s end, if he were to pick a top one habit of yours that he finds the most annoying it would be your tendency to hide your artworks from him until it’s finished when he’s always showing you his drafts.

Much like how you often try hiding your burdens, troubles, and blind dates from him, you often ban Beomgyu from seeing your drafts and sketches until the work itself is done which, as a fellow artist, makes him want to sneak up on you even more.

Especially when you think that you’ll be working on a particular project for a long time or if it’s in a medium you haven’t tried before, you’d often be blocking Beomgyu from seeing a peek of your plans out of a weird superstition that you might not finish anything if you hear a comment from him too early.

As your musician best friend who’s always showing you his own work even when it’s still disjointed lyrics and melodies in his head, Beomgyu sometimes thinks that you don’t trust him enough in something important as your own art. Without you knowing, it hurts him a bit sometimes because it’s as if he can’t be useful for you in that sense when you're always his most trusted critic when it comes to his music.

“It’s not like I can possibly make a bad comment.” Beomgyu insisted sometime during midterms as you talked over your senior thesis projects over dinner. It was almost 2 AM in your dorm’s communal kitchen, your mugs only half-filled with lukewarm chocolate when the boy asked if he could take a peek at your sketchbook after letting you hear some of his new music. “With you and your art? Impossible to make any bad comments I’m telling you!”

“Eh, but—“ Maybe it was the tiredness from having been up for 24 hours straight, trying to stay on top of your piling requirements, that unlike your usual response to Beomgyu’s pouting and puppy eyes, you decided to blurt out, “I just—I don’t know…I think too highly of your opinion.”

Beomgyu was effectively rendered frozen and speechless, missing the way you slouched your shoulders and hid your face behind your hair after your confession. “I—what?”

“Don’t make me repeat it.” You deadpanned, taking another sip of your chocolate next to him. At least with your shoulders touching, you couldn't see the way his expression unconsciously softened while listening to you. "It's already embarrassing enough as it is."

“But…but why?”

“Why what?”

“Why would you think highly of my opinion? It’s just me.” Beomgyu chuckled nervously, feeling his face heat up in embarrassment as he spoke. “Not like I’m a professional artist or whatever.”

“Do I really have to say it?”

Beomgyu nodded, pursing his lips. "I'm being serious right now." He pretended to squint his eyes and furrow his brows and you rolled your eyes in response.

With a sigh, you then answered. “It’s exactly because you’re you. You’re Choi Beomgyu, the annoying kid from the neighborhood who just decided one day that he’d join me at the plastic tables in the playground when he saw me drawing flowers on my mom's notepad. The one who bought me my first oil paint set for Christmas in the 7th grade because he said he noticed how much I enjoyed it in our Art class. The one who always adds more compliments to my work along with actually helpful feedback even when I ask for criticisms only because he’s too nice for his own good but he’s also very intuitive.

“You…annoying as it is, you’re kind of very important in my art and it makes me nervous sometimes to show you anything before it’s complete because I think it has to be perfect and totally not disappointing even when you first see it. I only want you to see good things from me...”

While the silence that followed felt like an hour for you, it felt like forever in Beomgyu's mind as his thoughts flew to the memories as you mentioned them.

Much like you, he can also vividly remember how exactly you befriended each other at the playground then, when he complimented your doodle of the daisy bushes by the swings because you drew them a little too well for a five-year-old with broken crayons and an unsharpened pencil. You even complained to him that you can render the flowers better if you just didn't forget your sharpener at home, leading to a whole conversation that you continued at the swings where he offered to push you for the rest of that afternoon.

He remembers that 7th grade Christmas when he picked your name for the class Secret Santa and didn't even have to read more on the wishlist below your name because he was already set on buying you an oil paint set and some brushes to go with it outside of the classroom. He knew you were saving up to buy it in the summer yourself but he also knew that it'd make you even happier to get it six months earlier so it was easy for him to take money from his own savings that were supposed to go on a new ukulele.

But more importantly, his mind lingers to a memory you didn't mention, to that day outside of the teacher's lounge when you were first filling in your college applications. While your other friends were talking animatedly about what they were planning to do after your high school graduation, you were unusually quiet next to Beomgyu as you filled out your application which quickly prompted him to ask if you were okay.

"What did you put in your program?" He had asked after, leaning his head on your shoulder only for you to cover the top half of your application with your hands. "Ya, I want to see!"

"No, it's embarrassing!" You protested, moving the form away from his peering eyes when his hand tries to reach for it. "You'll know later anyway if I pass Seoul University!"

"You mean 'when' you pass." He corrected, resting his chin on your shoulder this time before peering up at you. "And why are you embarrassed over your program? It's not the most embarrassing choice you've made in front of me."

"Ya!"

"So what is it?"

You leaned away from him and Beomgyu found it weirdly strange to be on eye-level with you while seated after he's suddenly grown almost a head taller than you over the summer. "I might...do a double degree on Painting and Sculpture."

"What's embarrassing about that? If anything, I'd be surprised if those two are nowhere near your top five options." He raised a brow almost instinctively. "Y/N, a double degree's impressive as hell!"

"It's just that..." You stumbled shyly over your words, scratching the nape of your neck. "I don't know, it's a shot in the dark. It's not like I'm that good like how you're great with your music."

"That's bullshit. You've always been talented and hardworking when it comes to your art. If anything, it's me who's always trying to catch up with you." He countered immediately, sitting up straight with a serious expression on his face. "And it's something you love and want to learn more of so why would it be embarrassing? Be confident and own your passions, Y/N."

"They might not actually see that if I don't do well in the exams and the portfolio I turn in. For all we know, I suck compared to other people."

"You literally just won a mural competition last summer." Beomgyu rolled his eyes. "Admissions would be dumb to reject you."

Looking back on that memory almost four years ago, the revelation of what you really think of him makes Beomgyu's head spin that he had to quickly snap himself back to reality when you downed the last of your chocolate and mumbled how opening up was a mistake to yourself.

"I'm going to bed." You announced, rubbing your eyes tiredly and clutching your mug to your chest.

Before you could leave the table, however, Beomgyu quickly grabs onto your arm. "Wait, wait, no!"

"I'm tired as shit. You can rub my emotional comments on my face tomorrow morning."

"It's not that." Beomgyu frowned, tugging on your arm for you to sit down again. When you hesitantly follow along with him, he then continued, "It's just...is that why you tried hiding your application form from me back then?"

"I mean, I wasn't as confident in myself then as I am now and I had my other doubts about taking the program itself but...yeah, I guess." You shrugged slowly, looking everywhere but him. "I also thought that if I take both Painting and Sculpture, I have to make you proud no matter what."

On any other day, he would've teased you for it but he knew you'd probably smack his head on the table in that moment. So, instead, he held back on a smile and nudged you gently on the shoulder. "You make me proud no matter what you do." He assured. "And, if you must know, I also think highly of your opinion on my music...I guess we just show it in different ways.

"And if you're not ready to show me some of your new projects yet, it's okay. I can wait for all of them because I know they'll all turn out great."

You then looked up at him with raised brows. "Even if I make you wait until graduation for some of them?"

"I might ask Ryujin or Soobin to take photos of your progress for me if I have to wait that long." He joked, making you chuckle. "You know, the usual."

"Sure you will." You scoffed before picking up his mug on the table and standing up again. "Dude, come on, we really have to go to bed."

IV. WE KEEP SECRETS FROM EACH OTHER

It's not to say, however, that there aren't any instances when your roles are unwittingly reversed. Beomgyu also closes himself off from you and everyone else from time to time and you naturally end up being the nosy one banging on his door and demanding for him to at least let you know that he's eating well.

It's often when Beomgyu's stressed—when there's too much work to be done, especially in his music, or when he suddenly finds himself in a problem that he unusually doesn't share with you at the first encounter.

In these moments, you usually start noticing a week before he could even lock himself in his room and isolate himself from all of your friends. Especially since university began when you'd mostly meet in the day at lunch with your friends, he'd stop pestering you to elaborate more on a story you'd tell half-heartedly but he'll still hold your hand under the tables in front of all of your friends, squeezing it more often than usual out of anxiety.

And his smile never reaches his eyes when he's stressed, the same way his laugh would be quieter, an easy giveaway that he's going through something he's decided to keep on his own.

So as someone who's noticed his patterns over the years, you let him be at first, squeezing his hand back and initiating all the jokes in the group for him to finish with the punchline so he doesn't linger too much in his own thoughts.

Then when Hueningkai or Soobin do message you that Beomgyu hasn't left his room except to go to only half of his classes, you're quick to come up to his dorm with takeout and whatever project you're working on, knowing that what he really needs best in these moments is company.

There's times when Beomgyu acts extra bratty and doesn't let you in his personal space for a couple of days, a week at most like the time he was so stressed about Toto getting sick back in your Freshman year. It takes a lot of time out of your week and money from your weekly allowance buying him food but you wait patiently by his door anyway, catching up on your studies on the hallway floor if you're at the dorms or outside his room back in your neighborhood and occasionally knocking on his door to ensure that he's still alive.

But when he does let you in, opening the door just wide enough for you to see his bloodshot tired eyes and a blanket over his head, you take the initiative to open the door wider and hug him before anything else.

You almost never initiate skinship as much as you never share things until they're prodded out of you by Beomgyu, he knows that well so that's exactly what you do when you first see him in this state. All the time.

You don't speak until he lets you go and you're allowed to occupy his space with him. Back in your old neighborhood, you would put your things on his desk next to his own and work quietly until he decides to open up to you on his own accord.

Since college started, however, things have been slightly different in that once you're in the room, you'd sit on his bed first and let him hug you until he's ready to talk. If his roommate, Hueningkai, would be there at the end of the day, you'd throw a shoe at the younger boy and ask him to come back after dinner with the promise that you'd play Mario Kart with him the next weekend.

When Beomgyu's stressed, he likes it better when it's just the two of you, your exact opposite since you'd rather have all of your close friends with you on a hangout when you're in a similar state of mind.

The most stressed Beomgyu has been in college was when he was finishing the first official album for TXT, the band he formed with Yeonjun, Soobin, Taehyun, and Hueningkai in the summer before your freshman year. It was in the second semester of your junior year, when both of you were also preparing for internship applications on top of academics and the clubs piling one on top of each other that you sort of saw this coming as soon as you felt stressed out yourself.

Beomgyu only let you in his dorm room on your fifth day of camping out, crying out his frustrations on your shoulders for almost two hours that you had to change into one of his shirts after and ask Hueningkai to bring up a whole pitcher of water for your best friend to drink over dinner.

"I—I...I just...I can't! I can't finish the songs! I'm going insane!" He exclaimed on your shoulder, his cries muffled against you but you don't mind as you continue rubbing his back in circles and reminding him to breathe. "And...and nothing's been going my way these days! Not in my classes, not in the radio show or on the soccer team! I'm just...I'm just so out of it, Y/N!"

You hummed comfortingly, carefully moving both him and yourself so you're both sitting up properly once more. You then pointed to his open laptop and computer screens on the desk across the room with a small smile, "I can see your progress from here, though. You've been doing well. You're trying and getting things done, that's what matters."

"It's not all that good..."

You shook your head almost immediately, handing him another pack of tissues you've brought with you before discarding the used ones in the nearby trash bin. "Yes, it is! I've heard the drafts before you locked yourself up in here, they're all great." You retorted, tilting your head when he buries his face in the crook of your neck once more. "I think I like Thursday's Child Has Far To Go and Maze in the Mirror the most. They're very you.

"And about your classes and clubs, just take your time with them. Soobin and I e-mailed some of your profs already, Jeongin and Tae are handling the radio show well, and I'm sure Sunwoo and the rest of the soccer team would understand your absence for now.

"For now, just do what you want to do. Rest if you want to rest. If you want to focus on the band, then that's fine too. Everything will align themselves in time, just please don't forget to take care of yourself."

"And if they don't? Align themselves in time, I mean?"

His breathing was ragged then from all of the crying and his eyes the reddest and puffiest you've ever seen them. You figured from then on that you really hate seeing Beomgyu cry in frustration the most.

"They will, I promise. They always do with you." You replied without thinking, hesitantly patting his head and gently wiping his tears with your thumbs. "And you know I'll stay with you here until you're satisfied with your progress. Or at least for a couple of days because I have tons of presentations next week."

He sniffled a bit, spraying his hands with alcohol and adjusting the blanket wrapped around him. "W-What are you going to work on in a bit?"

You scoffed, already expecting that he'd ask. "I brought a project for my Sculpture II class, if that's okay. I also brought newspapers so I don't make a mess on the floor." You answered anyway, chuckling when his eyes immediately lit up. "You've been bugging me about it so I thought I can show you the my progress just this once to cheer you up."

And as if a light switch was turned, the glossiness previously in his eyes suddenly looked like sparkles as he sat up straight. "I could smother your face in kisses right now."

"Wipe that snot off of your nose first." You pretended to cringe when he dramatically opened his arms wide and puckered his lips. At that moment, you immediately knew that he was feeling a bit better, at least. "Geez, sometimes, I think you just sulk sometimes to get me to come here and show you my works early."

"I'm not that evil!" He pouted, taking the weighted blanket off of his back and getting off the bed. "Though, now that you've suggested it..."

A pillow then quickly landed on his face. "Choi Beomgyu!"

So you spent three nights at Beomgyu and Hueningkai's dorm room, working on a bust of Yeonjun (it's a long story involving you losing a bet to him at your last group hangout) on the floor while Beomgyu finished the final edits to TXT's songs. You then go back to your own dorm room before breakfast to freshen up for your class then come back again after your classes, often around 4 PM.

And when Beomgyu finally caught up with his classes and extra-curriculars, he surprised you with an invitation to TXT's surprise album launch over a month later.

Another thing about Beomgyu is that he's strangely great with surprises, preparing elaborate plans for occasions like your birthday, the holidays, or when he's bounced back from a difficult situation right under your nose.

Initially, the boys only told you that they'd release the album after finals week and play it at the year-end school festival, the first time they would be performing a full set of original songs. Though you, Yeji, Ryujin, and Yunjin insisted that they should do a proper album launch, all five of the boys just kept saying excuses or shifting the topic to something else.

On your last official school day for that semester, however, you suddenly received a notification from TXT's social medias about a surprise album launch at a cafe you frequent with all of your friends and a personal message from Beomgyu telling you to come over 30 minutes before the show.

So in retaliation, you made sure to stop over at the nearest flower shop with the girls and surprise Beomgyu with at least a congratulatory bouquet of roses, the same size as the one he gave you all of those years ago.

Said bouquet almost getting ruined when Beomgyu hugged you the moment you entered the cafe.

"You came!" He exclaimed giddily on your neck, almost toppling you to the ground as his arms encircled your waist. "You came! You came! You came!"

You scoffed, taking a moment to regain your footing as you rested your cheek against your best friend and carefully held the bouquet behind his head. "Of course I'd come. I'm your number one fan."

"Sure you are." He feigned a sniffle before tilting his head away to press a kiss to your cheek. "But still, thank you for coming. This means a lot to me."

"I know."

"You helped finished this album."

"I doubt that. I just worked with you in silence for three days straight."

He shook his head fervently, pulling away from you fully by then and leading you to the makeshift stage across the room. "You helped me refocus and get back on my feet so I can finish everything. I think you helped big time." He retorted before picking up his guitar from its stand. "Anyway, I have another surprise!"

"I only got you one." You feigned a frown while shaking the bouquet in your hands, making him chuckle before occupying the empty high stool next to him. "I'll have to get back at you again after this."

"You're already doing so much for me coming here tonight. And you bought me really expensive flowers!" He assured, strumming the guitar a few times. When you then opened your mouth to retort, he quickly interjected, "Anyway, I wrote this song for you! I'm still thinking if I want us to perform this later but I really just want to play it for you right now before anything."

So in the middle of that cafe, while your friends ran around preparing the decorations and doing soundchecks, Beomgyu sang his song, "Nap of a Star," with his guitar on his lap and his phone with the lyrics on the music stand.

"I can see even without you in front of me. I feel you, even without saying anything. Because I believe in you, even if I'm anxious

"I can touch even without you in front of my eyes. I reach even if you go far away from me. Just by remembering you, my heart always dances like before

"I want to become your nap and dream together always as if nothing happened. The evening sunset and the darkened night sky, my heart is full of you."

He occasionally giggled and fumbled on the guitar a bit everytime he glanced over in your general direction but he finished the song with you nearly in tears, something you instinctively hid by smacking him in the arm once the guitar was out of the way.

"You jerk! You wrote that for me? Are you sure?" You exclaimed, rapidly blinking back tears. "And I only got you flowers today! God, you're making me look like a bad friend!"

He rolled his eyes, getting down from the high stool and standing in front of you. With your own chair's height, you were easily at eye-level with him as he smiled at you. "I already told you, just coming over to hear us is already enough. Don't worry about it." He assured. "Anyway, what did you think of the song?"

"It's beautiful, of course." You scoffed half-heartedly, making him chuckle. "Was that night walk in the lyrics about—?"

"That night walk at the art fair? Yeah." He grinned shyly, rubbing the nape of his neck.

Once, in the 9th grade, you had a big fight with Beomgyu over Areum, at that point his ex-girlfriend. What you both do remember the most about it is how it happened on the week before a planned trip to an art fair in the busier district of Seoul that you were really excited about.

Though you were pretty sure that you weren't on speaking terms with him that time, he still showed up at the bus stop on the day itself, prompting you to apologize to each other before heading to the art fair together.

"You were crying like shit in public that we had to move to a more secluded area because people were looking. Then, you almost choked me to death with your hug." You recalled in confusion. "Not like I was any better but..."

"I put it in because I really thought our friendship was over then." He explained with a pout. "Then the first words we told each other when you saw me at the bus stop were apologies and...ah, it's very cheesy but I just think back to that time whenever I miss you. I think it's one of those moments I remember when I think of our bond."

You smack him again, this time directly on his chest, but the tears also flow freely this time. "God, you're so...you're so poetic and annoying! And you're making me cry!"

"I take that as a win." He laughed deeply as he hugged you, one hand rubbing your back soothingly while the other cupped your face and wiped your tears gently.

"How can you even say those things without crying? We've been friends for almost 16 years, damn it, Gyu." You mumbled in his plaid shirt, hugging him back. "I-I really love the song…”

"Years of practice on how to say it properly, actually." He joked half-heartedly, rubbing your back even more and mumbling to a passing Soobin something about the last preparations for the album launch. "That's why I do all the talking for us."

V. I LOVE YOU TOO MUCH

Your thesis for your Painting degree, you realize right before the Winter break this senior year, is the perfect surprise to get back at Beomgyu. While you've briefly mentioned that you'll have to take an extra year to complete your Sculpture degree's senior thesis, you're focusing on your Painting degree in your 4th year and have miraculously kept it under wraps from everyone including your best friend because everything's been hidden in your laptop and at the studios.

At the same time, it sort of fits. Though overall, most of the studies, actual finished works, and research you've done so far for your thesis are focused on human relationships overall, traces of Beomgyu have been slipping in here and there, reminding you that it's quite hard to paint anything about your friends or your first love without him.

He's in the series of studies you did of all of your friend groups, in a watercolor rendition of the faces you remember from your old neighborhood's playground, and even in a charcoal rendition of your favorite romance book characters as your thesis advisor suggested that you try and explore.

And he's in even more finished works and abandoned sketches way before that, some you unconvered in your old binders while researching for your thesis.

It could just be the extra hustle and bustle of your senior year, with you and all of your friends busier than ever as you work on your final year. Not to mention, you still have to prepare balancing a job at the university museum with your fifth year classes next year and Beomgyu's been busy putting out new music with TXT and discussing a junior producer position at an entertainment company.

But it's been almost a whole month since you last went to a proper lunch (one that isn't jut coffee and convenience store ramen) with any of your friends which is a whole record for you and Beomgyu, in particular. You're probably just missing the guy a bit too much these days that even just getting his daily cheer up messages has been messing with your thoughts all over again.

(Not that it doesn't mess you up on any normal day. It's just a tad bit extra now that you haven't seen his face around in a while)

So when you brought up to your thesis advisor the idea of painting a portrait of Beomgyu, the studies of which you would gift him for Christmas then remake as a proper oil painting for your thesis after the Winter break, there wasn't much of a complaint on her part.

Hell, you might even suspect that Prof Kim, a mentor whom you've also had in past studio classes, has been secretly rooting for you this whole time after years of always seeing Beomgyu randomly pop up around the department building.

"And what kind of relationship will a portrait of Choi Beomgyu represent in your exhibit?" She asked on Monday with a teasing glint in her eyes, a copy of your project research in her hands.

Your face heated up in an instant as you fumbled over your words, something you quickly excuse as a reaction related to the snow outside. "I—well...I'll figure that out later which I know is a cop out answer academically but I'll connect it to something in my RRL later, I promise!"

Prof Kim chuckled, closing her binder. "I'm kidding, I'm kidding! Personally, I think you already have it in your RRL and project proposal, you just need to make a more explicit mention of your friend in the paper moving forward since he'll be a subject in one of your finished works."

You nodded sheepishly, quickly gathering your things and standing up to bow at your advisor. "I'll e-mail you my progress again next week before the break!"

"No, no, it's okay! Just e-mail me after the holidays, I won't deduct grades or anything!"

A few days later, you're on the floor of your dorm room with Ryujin and Yeji cramming their own choreographies for their respective senior theses in another corner of the room while you finished your second study of Beomgyu, using your most recent photos as a reference.

The small 12x16 canvas you were working on sat comfortably on an equally small easel on your work desk, another canvas of the same dimensions drying by the windowsill next to a pile of old photos at the same time. Since your thesis would only require photos of your studies, you figured that you can give all of them to Beomgyu then make an extra oil painting of the two of you, knowing that he'd probably shy away (after making egotistical jokes, of course) if it's all just him.

"So what would the final painting be?" Ryujin suddenly asked as Yeji pauses the music for a five-minute break, approaching you as she drinks a bottle of cold water. "They're all so different."

You glanced over your shoulder and frown. "That's the thing, I'm not really sure how I want to paint him in the final work."

"Why?" Yeji asked this time, sitting cross-legged on a nearby mat.

You shrugged in response. "I don't know. Honestly, I thought if I do some studies, I'd get a clearer idea but I'm already three paintings in and I still have no plan of action for the one that actually counts to a grade." You sighed, turning your attention back to your unfinished painting.

"At least you have the Christmas gift ready!" Ryujin half-heartedly joked, sitting on an empty chair next to you. On your peripheral vision, you also caught Yeji nodding with a hopeful smile. "You don't have to paint the final work until after the break, anyway."

"Yeah, but it's the one that's going to be displayed at the exhibit at the end of the year." You pointed out matter-of-factly, carefully finishing the last layer of your painting. "And it has to be perfect."

"Maybe you can work something out over the break? You're going home to your neighborhood with Beomgyu and spending more time with him, anyway." Yeji suggested next. "Maybe then you'll have a clearer idea, hm?"

And Yeji was definitely right, as she always is, when you do go home to your old neighborhood with Beomgyu after the last official school day of the semester and find yourself hanging out in his childhood bedroom on the days leading up to Christmas much like the old days.

The idea comes to you on the afternoon of Christmas Eve almost two weeks later, when you invited yourself at the Choi's once more to listen to TXT's new songs and catch up with Toto. You sat cross-legged on Beomgyu's bed with your own earphones connected to his laptop and a live-sketch of the boy in his favorite green plaid shirt and freshly cut and dyed black hair on your lap.

Glancing over at him and seeing the way his eyes sparkled as you listened to "Way Home," it was a rather quick revelation to you that the best way to paint your best friend is in his most comfortable state. Just like this: when it's just the two of you drawing and listening to music, basking in the comfort of each other's company.

So you looked back at him again as the song transitioned to "Blue Hour," trying to take in as much of his features in that moment as much as you can. The faint sunlight coming in through the fogged up windows, Beomgyu's messy hair and skewed reading glasses, his hand propped up on his desk as he rested his cheek on his palm, his brows furrowed slightly in concentration as he worked only to consciously soften them when he looks at you, the way he talked animatedly about certain parts of the song with a boyish but proud grin on his lips.

Before you can even listen to the third song, you were already placing your hand on his upper arm and asking him to stay still for a moment.

"Why?" He asked, blinking twice while his hands go to pausing the song on his laptop anyway.

"I'm trying to memorize your face in this light." You answered absentmindedly, turning to a fresh page on your sketchbook and looking at him for a minute longer before removing your hand from him. "Okay."

"Okay?" He chuckled nervously. "What was that for? Are you going to send the mafia to kill me or something?"

You rolled your eyes, folding your knees closer to your chest to hide your sketchbook as you start anew. "It's a secret."

He then tried peering over your shoulder, moving the chair he was sitting on closer to the bed. "Are you drawing me?"

"Maybe." You teased with a smirk before pulling the sketchbook closer to your chest when he tried peering again. "Play the next song, Gyu."

Painting him in another solo portrait then on one of the two of you after that was relatively quick and easy as you finished your final gifts on Christmas Day while Beomgyu and his family went to a reunion out of town. While the last painting study, the one you'll render to a bigger canvas after the break, is him looking back at you fondly on that Christmas Eve afternoon, the additional painting of the two of you was from a candid photo Taehyun took when Beomgu played you Nap of a Star.

So now, here you are, in your room this time with the portraits gift-wrapped on the foot of your bed while your best friend handed you a late Christmas gift of his own.

"I was going to make it on my computer at first since everyone was sending in pictures on chats but then Yeonjun said that it might end up looking like the slideshows you have at funerals even with my superior editing skills." Beomgyu explained with a nervous chuckle as you unwrapped the gift, finding a thick scrapbook of all of your memories and mementos growing up. "Since everything else of you that I have—the pictures, the craft store receipts, Lotte World tickets, and everything—are all in boxes at home and at the dorms, I just thought I'd print the pictures I got from our friends and instead of scanning the things I already have then make it into a physical scrapbook.

"You did always say that you want to make one someday but we never really had the time so I thought I'd start it for you and, surprisingly, there are too many things in my own space that are yours or remind me of you."

You browse through the abnormally thick book in surprise and amusement, not even knowing that Beomgyu's kept even the simplest scraps of paper related to you after all these years. From the pictures his mom took of the two of you for every first day of school until the 12th grade to the candid photos he's taken of you over the years on his phone (regardless of how unflattering they are—you make sure to smack him in the arm everytime you come across one as you continue browsing) to notes you'd leave on his locker whenever he missed school and all the Christmas tags you've put on your previous gifts, it's the most detailed history of the two of you from when you met up until the present, complete with small captions handwritten by the boy himself.

So much so that you even linger on some of the pages you never thought you'd see, including the sketch you drew that day on the playground, the first note he passed you in class in the 1st grade, and a copy of the front page of the Science paper you crammed with him in the 6th grade.

"How did you even get some of these?" You ask, pointing to a photo of the two of you from your first Christmas together you somehow forgot existed. It was in the 1st grade when the Chois had to cancel going to their annual family reunion because of Mr. Choi's work so your families ended up watching the neighborhood fireworks display together. "I don't even think I have a copy of this!"

"That's from my mom! Also took her a long time to find on her phone." Beomgyu grins before turning to another page just full of flattened flowers, mostly daisies and roses. "And these are from all the bouquets you've bought me for recitals, graduations, and our first album launch! I kept at least one of everything because I wanted to use them in a project someday but I wasn't really sure what until I got the idea to make you a scrapbook."

"How did you even decide to give me a scrapbook for Christmas? And going through all the trouble of asking everyone we know for extra pictures? I thought you were busy with the band and your thesis?" You ask next, turning to the last page and finding a bunch of old letters and old invitations, the one from your senior prom standing out. By this point, it was hard to keep the stray tears at bay as you sniffle, making Beomgyu laugh before passing you tissues.

You went with all of your friends back then but you only danced alone with Beomgyu, somehow deluding yourself into thinking that he would confess and reciprocate your feelings.

But he never did, holding himself back from saying anymore in front of your house and simply kissing your forehead at the end of the night, and that was probably the only time you cried over the boy for that reason.

Beomgyu scratches his head and smiles sheepishly before slowly gesturing over to your wrapped gift for him. "A-Ah, well...Ryujin may or may not have mentioned something about you slaving away the past few weeks for your gift."

Your jaw slacks. "Are you serious?"

Before you could protest even more, however, Beomgyu's quick to raise his hands up in defense and interject, "Well, to be fair, I got the original idea of a simple scrapbook with everything I have way before Ryujin approached me! Then she mentioned sometime ago how hard you were working on my Christmas present that I had to up the stakes and ask for more pictures and stuff from everyone else after.

"And it wasn't that time consuming, actually! Everyone was happy to share photos and even some stories about you which I wrote in some of the entries because I thought it was sweet. Just...I want you to feel absolutely loved with this gift.

"And I mean, isn't it also nice seeing us from other people's point of view?" He points out next, flipping back to the pages mainly dedicated to photos of you and your mutual friends mixed in with photos they took of you. "It's also kind of a gift from everyone else in that sense."

You wipe another set of stray tears, making Beomgyu pout and reach a hand up to help you.

"Are you okay—?"

"I love it so much." You sniffle, smacking his arm before hugging the scrapbook to your chest. "Thank you, Gyu."

He heaves a sigh of relief, clutching his chest with his free hand. "There are still some blank pages towards the end. I figured you can put your own stuff in it if since I know you keep some things in the box under the bed." He suggests, patting the bed as if to gesture to the boxes you keep under it. "Or if you want, we can just fill it with new stuff later."

"Will you help me add in my own things?"

He nods with a bright smile. "We can do it before dinner with your parents." He then reaches towards the opposite end of the bed and picks up his gift, shaking it in front of him and asking next, "Should I open my gift in the meantime?"

"Yes, please. I can't be the only one crying right now." You nod with a chuckle, moving the scrapbook to your bedside table and helping him remove the tapes all over his gift.

"Before you make your usual complaint that it's too much, it's also actually part of my senior thesis for my Painting degree. Remember how I mentioned last time that I decided to make two separate theses for my programs? So, these are studies for one of my final paintings." You explain as the paintings come into view, Beomgyu's eyes widening and his jaw slacking in an instant.

"Woah..." He breathes, laying the canvases next to each other gently. “This is...this is amazing!"

"And there's one of the two of us. Look." You point at the last painting with a small smile. "The reference is from a photo Taehyun sent to our chat after the album launch."

"A-And...and where are the other portraits from?" He asks in a lower voice after a moment, eyes sparkling when he looks up at you again.

You gulp down any feelings of wanting to melt on the spot, pointing to each painting as you answer, "The first portrait's from a photo I took at your last gig, the second one's from last summer when we went to Haeundae beach, and the third one's from just the other day when you were letting me listen to your new music."

He points to the last one shyly, his cheeks flushed pink as the two of you look over at the painting of him listening to music on his headphones with a small smile on his face. "This was in my room?"

You nod, equally shy now that he's asking the questions upfront. "I-I just figured...you looked so warm and cozy then and that's always how I remember you so...yeah. That's also the one I'll be painting in the final work that's going in my thesis."

"Really?" His eyes widen even more, to which you simply nod once more before briefly looking away from him.

"Yeah, because my thesis is mostly on human relationships and, really, the rationale in all of these paintings is that I wanted to portray you as how you are in my eyes which is—"

Before you could even finish your thought, however, Beomgyu's oversized hoodie engulfs you and his lips land on your cheek. Then he gives you another peck, this time on a spot just slightly higher on the same cheek.

Then another, and another, before moving to another cheek. "You're amazing. I love you so much." He whispers against your skin dangerously close to your lips, almost as if he was telling you a very important secret.

And you know he means it differently than the other times he casually says it to you when he doesn't laugh excitedly between his words or jokingly force you to say it back as he would often do.

Instead, he punctuates the declaration by cupping your face gently and repeating the words again. "I love you so much. I love you the most." He sighs, meeting your gaze desperately.

And it's probably the years of knowing him that he doesn't have to elaborate on it further for you to catch on. At the same time, you feel a weight lift itself off of your shoulders at this, one that you haven't even realized you've been carrying along with you this whole time, hugging the boy back tighter with your arms on his waist in response.

“Can I?” He asks next, stroking your cheek with his thumb as his eyes momentarily flickers down to your lips.

You nod with a soft hum almost instantly, tilting your face as he closes the gap between your lips.

Beomgyu kisses you like it's the most natural thing in the world for him to do, his lips feeling comforting on top of yours as he conveys every built up feeling and all the kinds of love he’s had for you in the past 16 years and receives the same back from you.

And all negative thoughts you’ve had, worries that your best friend will never look at you the same way you’ve always hoped for him to, are immediately thrown off the window and replaced by the assurance that Choi Beomgyu, the nuisance who’s been affectionately stuck to your hip since day one, is in love with you.

"I love you." He repeats, voice muffled towards the end as he gives you another fleeting kiss before rubbing your noses together. "You know what I mean, right?"

"I love you too." You reply on your own accord, panting slightly as you fill your lungs in with air and biting your lip as you feel your face heat up after. "I outlined it out at the bottom of our painting too with my signature, in case you didn't spot it."

"Ya, I did." He chuckles sheepishly, briefly moving to sit away to put your paintings on the side of the bed. Before the space he previously occupied in front of you grows cold, his arms are back around you once more as he tackles you down on the bed. "I'll hang all of them in my dorm when we get back."

"You can't nail things to the walls then graduate. That's not how it works." You laugh with a shake of your head, encircling your arms on his neck as he props himself on his elbows on top of you. When he laughs along, something in your heart stirs happily at how the two of you could go from intimate to casual so smoothly, assuring you that nothing much is going to change—just now with more-than-friendly kisses and the assurance that your best friend feels the same about you. "Anyway, they're all small enough to go on your desk at the dorms and at the studio."

"Then I'll put them on my work desk at the studio. Everyone has to know I have a really talented partner."

"Partner?" You scoff teasingly against the sudden rapid beating of your heart, playfully pushing him away. "I'm your significant other now?"

"Didn't I make it clear enough with the kisses and the hug? Not even with the fact that I've been sticking by you my entire life?" He feigns a pout as he easily rolls the two of you over with you comfortably on top of him now. "Should we make out instead?"

Your face heats up more at the comment, eyes widening when he does press a longer kiss on your lips and even manages to open your mouth while you’re distracted. "That's also not how it works, Gyu!" You manage to successfully push him away and roll your eyes, hiding your face in his chest in embarrassment.

"Then will you be my significant other? I'll take care of you like I always have, just with more kisses! Maybe some other things too like just five seconds ago." He dramatically asks with a smirk, teasingly prying your hands away from your face. "What? You wanted me to ask!"

"What happened to having shit taste in people and dating each other being an insult, then?” You tease one last time, making him groan. "Or not liking anyone I like, hm? You’re kind of contradicting yourself here.”

"We’re contradicting ourselves. I think I know enough Math to know that negatives cancel each other out." He retorts before leaning down for another kiss and resting his head on your chest after.

"But you suck at Math.”

"Do you want help with the scrapbook or not?"

VI. (epilogue) MAYBE WE WORK A LITTLE TOO WELL

A big bouquet of red roses and sunflowers is dropped in your arms by Beomgyu for the second time in your life, purposeful this time as he follows it with a an extra daisy tucked in your ear and a kiss.

"Congratulations on the exhibit, baby!" He greets you giddily after with a grin and a soft pat on your head. "I’m so proud of you! You’ve worked so hard!”

"Ew, ew, ew, not in front of us, please." Hueningkai complains, hiding behind Yeonjun and Taehyun as you lead your friends around your thesis exhibit. “I’m a child!”

You roll your eyes, draping your free arm around Beomgyu's waist anyway as Ryujin and Yeji wander off to the portraits you made of your family while the boys approach your studies on your high school and college friends.

"I have another surprise, by the way!" Your boyfriend speaks up again, taking out his phone and placing an earphone on your left ear. "I may or may not have gotten the idea from that time you were finishing up your thesis in the studio."

"I'm fucking scared." You joke, adjusting the earphone anyway while he wears the right bud on his right ear. "What is this?"

From what you can remember of those all-nighters two weeks ago, you brought your remaining works in his studio to work with him in the same space. While Beomgyu was winding down from having just finished his own thesis and recording the demo for a new song, you were trying to work quietly in your own corner, alternating between singing TXT's old songs to yourself or mumbling about how you were going to present the written part of your thesis to Prof Kim.

You also remember making out on the studio sofa while you’re on break but you’re pretty sure (well, you’re hoping your boyfriend's not insane like that) that it’s not anything remotely related to that in particular.

Beomgyu then takes your hand, leading you to where Yeji and Ryujin are. "Let's start here. I followed your gallery's pamphlet but modified it a bit towards the end so we'll end up in the painting you made of us."

And when you do stop in front of the painting series, that of your family over the years, Beomgyu's pre-recorded voice rings through your ears.

"Hello and welcome to "Why We Work,” a senior thesis by artist and my beautiful, beautiful partner, Y/N Y/L/N." Beomgyu proudly announces in the recording, making you laugh out loud in an instant. Faint in the background, you can distinctly hear Maze in the Mirror's instrumentals playing. "Y/N, baby, are you tuning in? Congratulations on finally finishing your Painting thesis! I made you an audio guide!”

You smack the real Beomgyu on his arm as you try and regain your composure. "Ya, you brat! What is this?”

He only giggles in response, making a shushing gesture dramatically. "Shh, just continue listening in. I made it for the whole gallery."

You roll your eyes but tune in anyway, responding well to the commentary as you walk with Beomgyu and even discussing some of the works yourself live and more in-depth.

“This was really sweet of you.”

“It is sweet of me, you’re welcome.” He teases, earning him another smack on the arm.

taglist: @wccycc @4beomy

[pinkydevil16]

Dark! Xavier Thorpe x reader: part 4

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10

Wednesday sat in the therapists office trying to think of how she could leave as Dr Kinbott tried to get her to open up, excusing herself to the bathroom as she looked around finding a window which she quickly climbed out of sliding down the pipe sneaking past the Principle's car and slipping into the coffee shop. Tyler jumping as she appeared behind the steam, the two conversing for a moment before she went to fix the machine. Y/n walked through town, dressed in her casual wear as she stuffed her hands in her coat pockets, she wanted to get a present for Enid since she was feeling down about her roommate so she'd brought her a pink sequinned skirt which sat in her bag as she typed away on her phone. Xavier asking if she still wanted to come to the nightshade meeting but Y/n refused to participate unless Enid was invited. She didn't know who else was in it but apparently they didn't think Enid was cut out for the group when Xavier asked so Y/n has firmly rejected his offer over and over since he wanted to bring her to the rooftop parties, skinny dipping, cocktails parties, mostly the skinny dipping. Y/n rolled her eyes as Xavier called her, her nails clicking against the phone as she answered looking across the road seeing Wednesday as the Weathervane.

"Yes?" Y/n said as she looked at her nails leaning against the wall as she looked at Wednesday talking to a boy as Xavier laughed down the phone.

"Come on, come to the meeting and see everyone, you know you want to." Y/n sighed pinching the bridge of her nose as she looked at the sky seeing the clouds cover the sun slightly.

"You're never going to stop are you? Get Enid in and then i will come to all your little parties and whatever else you weirdos do." Y/n said as she looked back towards Wednesday seeing three boys stood around her, her voice fading as she began walking over cutting Xavier off.

"I gotta go some normies are a bit too close to Wednesday." Y/n hung up as Xavier went to say something, hurrying across the street pushing the door to the coffee shop open as she interrupted Wednesday standing after one of the boys pushed the barista.

"Do you boys need something?" Y/n said scowling as her eyes turned purple the boy moving away from Wednesday as she stood next to the shorter girl placing a hand on her shoulder that glowed purple.

"Another freak, get the hell out of our town." Y/n snapped her head to the boy who spoke, a sick grin on her face as she flicked her finger making him fly upwards and dangle upside down, Wednesday glaring at the boy who pushed Tyler as Y/n sauntered forward pouting at the upside down boy. The other one going to punch her as she held her hand up his body freezing as purple mist surrounded him.

"Apologise." Y/n said with a wide grin her voice dropping into an almost sultry tone as she put her hands on her knees, Tyler's face turning bright red until he heard the sound of Wednesday beating up the mayor's son, his attention back on her as she defended him. The boys glared at Y/n as she fake pouted tilting her head in a mocking way before standing straight crossing her arms and cocking her hip.

"I don't like bullies, apologise now." Y/n's eyes flashed vivid purple as she spoke her voice no longer sweet instead she gritted it out as the floor opened, her eyes not leaving the two boys as the Sheriff panicked. 

"Let them go." He said looking towards Tyler as he tried to explain, Y/n looking at him with a smile but keeping them stuck as she raised her hand in mock surrender. Shrugging her shoulders as the boys stayed frozen with purple mist around them her eyes returning to normal.

"I don't know what you're on about officer." Y/n smiled politely as Principle Weems ran in seeing the two boys stuck and one on the ground a smile on her face as she apologised

"I apologise Sheriff these two escaped me, Y/n let them go." Principle's Weems voice came out stern as Y/n rolled her eyes looking at the boys with an eyebrow raised.

"They need to apologise first." Principle's Weems tried not to panic as she walked over to Y/n, looming over her as Y/n's eyes flashed purple in warning at the older woman, she didn't appreciate being intimidated. Y/n didn't drop them moving her hand as she waved her powers about enjoying aggravating the Principle and the sheriff. The sheriff nodding at the boys as they quickly apologised Y/n grinning widely and letting them go, the boy being placed gently on the ground as the other one moved further away his eyes darting to his friends as Y/n let the Principle pull her out. Tyler wanting to thank her and Wednesday but they both got escorted out with his dad accusing Wednesday's dad of murder 30 years ago, Y/n using her powers to open and close the car door as she relaxed Wednesday climbing in next to her as Principle Weems began lecturing them.

"That was unacceptable behaviour from both of you, Y/n you are not helping yourself i thought we had an understanding that you would be behaved, and Wednesday running out of your therapy session. I am so embarrassed." Principle Weems kept talking as Y/n looked out the window before turning towards the front seat leaning forward as she opened her palm a small bundle of mist in her palm.

"Principle Weems." Y/n said making the blonde haired woman turn as Y/n blew her smoke towards her, the mist covering her face before Y/n leaned back watching a smile come over Principle Weems face as she turned back to the road driving calmly.

"How was your session Wednesday?" Said girl looked at Y/n oddly before responding a single word Y/n now twirling her magic around her finger as she smiled at herself turning towards Wednesday putting her finger to her lips and grinning at the confused girl who only nodded.   

Y/n walked away from Wednesday as she texted Xavier saying she was back since he'd been flooding her with messages worried about what had happened, turning a corner as Xavier swung his arm over her shoulder Y/n looking at him with a smile.

"Want to explain what happened then?" Xavier said with a soft smile as Y/n placed her phone in her pocket passing him the bag as he took it walking with her towards the Quad.

"Some guys thought they could pick on Wednesday, i may have intervened but before you even think about telling me off i used my little trick to remove the memory from Principle Weems." Xavier smiled as she knew he was going to tell her off in fear of her getting expelled, she was always getting into small incidents mostly because she was getting into fun bets with her friends. 

"So rebellious, be careful you might make enemies with the normies." Y/n chuckled as they arrived at the table, Y/n taking the bag off Xavier as she leaned over placing it infront of Enid as she played with her nails, her eyes lighting up as she looked at Y/n.

"If this doesn't make you smile i don't know what will." Enid squealed standing up as she pulled the skirt out, holding it against her body as she ran over hugging Y/n as she stroked her hair rolling her eyes at how easily she changed to happy. Enid rushed over to Ajax sitting next to him as she showed him the skirt, his face going lightly pink as his snake hissed coming out his beanie showing his affection for her, Y/n sitting next to where Xavier had dropped down his legs straddling the bench as Y/n sat between his legs facing forward. Xavier dropped his head to her shoulder blowing air out onto her hair as she started chatting to Enid until a shadow stood over them, Y/n looking over to see Wednesday staring at her.

"What was that?" Wednesday said making Y/n quirk an eyebrow as she shuffled to straddle the bench her back against Xavier's chest as his arms wrapped around her waist his eyes closed and head leaning on her shoulder not paying attention. Y/n was used to him being draped over her, he always used the excuse of being tired and she didn't pry further not caring that he wanted to be so close enjoying the contact herself. 

"Wednesday, can't you just say thank you and be happy you're not in trouble?" Y/n smiled at her as Wednesday kept the same face before nodding and leaving, Enid rushing after her wanting to talk about their room. Xavier opened his eyes leaning back bringing Y/n with him as she let him do whatever he wanted, he'd slowly been adding more contact over the months he'd known her and she had never said or shown any dislike towards him doing it. 

"Why am i nice to people?" Y/n said looking towards Ajax as he stared at Enid with a small smile turning to Y/n as he stood up shrugging.

"Atleast you got a nod, she terrified me the first time i met her." Ajax left picking up his bag as Y/n moved out Xavier's hold turning to face him as he smiled at her, returning the smile she used her powers to push back his hair. Her knee raising do she could lean her head on it tilting her head as Xavier copied her.

"Only a few weeks until the poe cup, i hope you're not drawing anything dirty in your little porn shed." Y/n said with a cheeky grin as Xavier rolled his eyes, Y/n liked to tease that he had a secret stash of porn magazines as if he was a 90's horny teen, she wasn't fully wrong but Xavier didn't want her to know they were just ones of her. 

"It's so cute you think you'll win, i can't wait to make you do my homework for a week after you go for a swim in the lake. I'll have you hand cleaning all my clothes aswell." Xavier gave her a cheeky grin enjoying how Y/n huffed her lips pouting slightly.

"You'd like that wouldn't you, maybe i'll wear a little maid outfit for you perv." Xavier leaned back groaning as he looked at the sky, looking back at Y/n as she laughed.

"I didn't mean to walk in on you changing! In my defence you left the door open, if anyone's the perv it's you for wanting me to walk in. Just admit it Y/n you want me." Y/n rolled her eyes as Xavier moved his foot to poke her as he teased her, he enjoyed moments like this, she'd teased him for weeks after he'd walked in. He would never tell her but he had done it on purpose, he'd poked his head around seeing her change and walked in pretending to panic and cover his eyes as Y/n used her magic to push the door closed. She'd called him a perv and teased him enjoying how he blushed, he'd quickly started teasing her back and the argument was brought up often. Y/n hummed moving forward to flick his forehead laughing when he grunted pushing her hand away.

"Whatever helps you sleep at night perv." Y/n and Xavier grinned at each other before Y/n checked the time humming as she tapped on her phone.

"Want to hangout at the festival tomorrow? You can win me a panda to say sorry for being a perv." Xavier grinned nodding at Y/n as she got up ruffling his hair as she walked past him waving bye enjoying how Xavier got so flustered, her hands typing away at her phone as she went to Enid's room to collect her for another sleepover hoping to invite Wednesday. 

Wednesday explained her plan to run away, Y/n not paying attention as she flipped through the pages of one of Enid's magazine's, Thing, who Y/n had just met painting her other hand as Enid sat next to them painting her toe nails whilst Wednesday typed away. 

"Whose going to get you there?" Y/n said smiling at Thing as he showed her her new nails, moving to her other hand as she switched them to flip the page, his paint work immaculate as Y/n nodded impressed with his skill. Wednesday thought for a moment before turning around and walking towards them looking at Enid's computer.

"Let me use your computer, Thing i have a mission for you." Enid nodding enjoying being apart of Wednesday's plan although she didn't want her to succeed, Y/n moving as she watched Wednesday write on Thing's palm the hand scurrying off to give the message to Tyler. It took an hour before he called, Wednesday taking the laptop as Y/n braided Enid's hair listening to Wednesday's plan surprised Tyler agreed to help so quickly but assuming he was just a nice guy who probably had a crush on her. Y/n looking at Enid as Wednesday hung up on Tyler, moving over to her bed leaving the laptop on the bed as she changed into her pjs and laid down like a corpse.

"Be quiet, you don't want to wake the dead." Wednesday said as she closed her eyes, Y/n using her powers to turn off the lights her and Enid climbing into the bed and closing their eyes ready to sleep aswell. 

Wednesday Taglist:

@celibacy-or-death @sarcastic-sourwolf @snips-501 @lilithskywalker @parkersmyth @hey-im-bored504 @1horrormoviewhore1 @peachycupotea @moonmaiden1996 @bebopsworld @betray-jaes@o-the-o-grim-o-reaper-o @ilovedeadguys @kaz-2y567 @darling-twh @90sgothik@thematicallythalia @cheezybread @arivh @kaz-2y567 @akinatrix @just-sana @manuosorioh@alohastitch0626 @snips-501 @lovesanimals0000 @trashmouthsahra @whatinthefreshhellisthis@elle4404 @pasta88love @sourbiscuit @sl-t4ym1r @whatinthefreshhellisthis @it-was-never-meant-to-be-boys @bringontheweirdworld @laneyspaulding19 @torirosalie @nushy @sophiexoxsblog@here4thefanfic @clevercreatornight @@here4thefanfic @runrabbitrun3 @bi-narystars@doingurmom69 @hanmashujisfuturewife @maystecc @hannaeditzs @yeehawbitchs @living-breathing-bibliophile @kissmebakugou @yunoguns @iovaki @paulina15 @hotgirlsshareaccounts@wonderlandco 

[mystycalypso]

OKAY LETS TRY THIS AGAIN

Welcome To Ravenbrooks season 2 Theories before it comes out

Disclaimer uh- these are the ramblings of a mad man named Jack (me). Mainly so when it does eventually come out I can see what if anything I got right. Now lets get into it below the fold.

1. It's revealed that Jay Roth (Nicky's dad) is the one who died in Trinity's old house

We know in both the book and games and even the pilot, Nicky was the one living across from Mr. Peterson, but now it's Trinity's home. I think the grief of what happened in that house is why they moved

2. We'll get to see the rest of the Rescue Squad's parents

Pretty self-explanatory. I don't know what story purpose they'd serve exactly, aside from maybe how they react to their kids' shenanigans but it'd be really cool to see them. Especially Luanne Roth who I am currently head canoning to be neglectful in some manner (not necessarily on purpose) because of the lines about Nicky running away all the time and no one noticing he went missing.

3. We see a cultist in uniform

I think it'd be really interesting if specifically Trinity finds them mid ceremony or if bad things start happening to her family and she gets suspicious

4. The kids learn Mr. Peterson isn't "evil"

We know in the books that Theo is looking heavily into the cult, and he seems to be doing the same here. I think in Trinity's realization's she'll learn his real motivations for keeping them away, maybe even his side of the stories from episode 3

5. We learn what Trinity did

We have hints at what happened, obviously, but with the teaser image reusing the old photo of kid Trinity, l think we're going to learn what exactly happened and why it was so bad that they had to move towns

6. More nightmare sequences

From the hello neighbor franchise in general, we've learned that both Trinity and Nicky are prone to nightmares, and with the trauma they've gained from episode 6, I assume we'll get to see plenty other creepy cool nightmare scenes. (Seriously, just the maggots from episode 2 make me squirm physically when I see it. Every time)

7. Principle Abanante isn't dead

This might be clear to some, and yeah, it's far from the greatest stretch on this list but I think we'll see her again and maybe that she caused the school explosion

8. Delroy(and possibly Scout)'s investigations

I'm very curious about what Delroy was doing in the tunnels under the school, maybe doing his own investigations on the cult? Scout included to round out the Hello Neighbor hide and seek crew. Likely having to join forced with the current members of the rescue squad to stop a stronger force.

9. We see Theodore's brother in his "new form"

Not 100% sure if he became the Guest or the Thing, and I've seen good theories/evidence for both, but either way I think we'll get to see him with the knowledge that it's him.

10. We learn why Ivan acted the way he did in s1

He was more scared of just the mention of Peterson than anyone, and it's been bugging me since my first watch. I'd like to see if there's reason to his behavior or just general paranoia. Leaning towards the former, knowing this series.

11. Love triangle between Trinity, Nicky and Enzo

I'd really rather this doesn't happen. I hate love triangles so much. They're so dumb and useless and bad. But like I told kaydin during our third watch, I can feel it happening. It's breathing down my neck with the loud annoying sound of needless romantic tension.

12. The whole squad sits together at lunch

They escaped the basement together! The least they could do as friends is actually eat lunch together instead of Nicky and Trinity sitting seperate from everyone else

13. Nicky and Aaron's relationship is revealed

I'm really, REALLY hopeful that their friendship isn't retconned in the series. It was great motivation for Nicky to be investigating Mr. Peterson, and is also just generally sweet.

14. We see Aaron

Nicky was the basement for a couple of weeks. However, Aaron was in there for months! I'm eager to see how he is both mentally and physically. I feel like he's either gonna be much, much worse than Nicky or somehow way better.

15. Quentin becomes my favorite character

This is mostly on here as a joke. I'm not gonna lie, I know he'll be at least a favorite because he's my favorite Hello Neighbor game character. Like- the squeal I squealed when I saw his van and silly Hawaiian shirt was immense. I love him so much, and I hope he gets good screen time.

16. Nicky loses his bag

This is more just a- gut feeling? He's gained it as a sort of comfort item, it seems, and I feel like with the nature and badluck of Ravenbrooks, he's going to lose it. Bonus points if he has to choose between it or a member of the Rescue Squad

17. Mr. martaugh dies

Again, I have- no evidence for this. Yeah, he's in the teasers a lot, but like that doesn't imply he dies. Maybe I just really hope he dies because he's creepy /j, but yeah, uh- if it happens, I'll probably still be in shock even though it's on this list.

18. We see an on screen kiss

Tricky fans cross your fingers and pray, I know I will be. It'll probably just be a quick peck on the cheek, but I can just kind of feel it in my bones. Similar to the love triangle one.

And there you go! My predictions for Season 2!

As soon as it drops, you will probably see my reaction to it and a return to this list to see how close or far I was on these. (Spoiler tagged, of course) But until then, I will be patiently waiting, drawing, and rewatching the show too many times over (wonder if I can hit 50 watches before season 2 drops)

Cya!

- Jack

[malavera]

(18+) I'll show you how I am yours — Tom Cruise

summary: you're being emotional because it's that time of the month, Tom had to assure you for the millionth times that he's not going anywhere. To seal the deal just to convince you, he shows you how he's devoted to you and only you.

warnings: lil bit of fluff & angst, age gap (25/59), mature content, allusions to period sex, daddykink.

tagging: @tomsf18 @helloitstsyu @moondustfairies @deanscroissant @katherineswritingsblog @elenavampire21 @gypsymoon548 @love2write2626

We all know each month, a woman does not stay sane the same. The pre-menstrual mood swings would comes in various ways. We are all familiar with the Obsessive thoughts, easily irritated to feeling guilty and most importantly very self-critical. Your beloved has dealt with all kinds of moods and symptoms that you projects every month. But, he never complains. In fact, he lets you be however your mood wants you to be. When you said you wanted to be alone, although you made it clear after you snapped at him that you wanted him to leave you be—he would. But, it’s not like what you fear. He would close the door, lean against the wall besides it and wait for at least 5-10 minutes or more, for you to cool down—then he’d walk back in either with a cup of tea or bringing up your favorite sweets.

He’s different from the last two guys you dated. Because when it’s your time of the month, they’d never take you serious. They’d never wanted to take care of you, all they would do is complain on why couldn't you control it, why do you choose to snap at him, why are you so angry all the time and always ends up with a fight. That’s why you’re always insecure and afraid when the time has come, how would your new beloved react to you getting through all of these crazy hormones.

Sighing, you tighten your grip around his torso, snuggling your cheeks more to his chest. A negative thought has occurred, being a woman comes with so many fears towards man. What if it’s all just a façade?

“Tommy,”

“Yes, darling?”

“Do you think I’m pretty?” Tom scrunched his eyebrows in confusion, a small smile displayed on his face, turning his attention from the TV to look down at you.

“What do you mean? Of course you are beautiful, baby.” He replied with a kiss on your forehead.

“Why did you chose me?”

“Don’t you find me irritating sometimes?”

“Do you ever find me irritating?”

“Is there anything that I should change?”

“Out of all people, why did you choose me?”

"Would you ever leave me if you find anything that doesn't suits you?"

“Do you really love me?”

In all honesty, listening to all of your insecure questions due to your obsessive thoughts, aches his heart. Tom concludes that you have abandonment issues. Which breaks his heart not because he doesn't want you around, but it's because how easily you belittle yourself sometimes when you became his partner. He's glad that he found you, but he's not a jerk, he wished that you would've loved yourself more than you love anybody else.

"I'm sorry, do you think I'm annoying for talking too much?"

"I'm sorry if I would snap at you in any time of day later today, I wouldn't mean to. It's the hormones you know?"

Tom sighs with a warm smile on his face, he gestured for you to sat up and lean against the pillows, his arm placed behind your shoulders.

"Baby, listen to me... You don't have anything to be sorry for, okay? I understand. No, you could never irritate me. No, I would never find you irritating. No, there isn't a thing I want you to change, you're perfect in your own way." He gently spoke, his knuckles moving a strand of your hair out of your face.

"I chose you, because I know that I want to spend the rest of my life with you. You're a good woman, you have a good heart. Yes, you may be tough at some time or place and you'd stand on your ground when it comes to your principles, but I respect that. I love you." Your lips tremble, the tears forming in your eyes almost blurred your vision as you are moved listening to the wonderful speech he said about you.

"You would never leave me, right Tommy?" You muttered.

"I would never. Because you're mine, and let me show you how I am yours."

And with that, his soft lips connected with yours—pulling you to sit across his lap gently without hurting you as your body is fragile during your period. His big and calloused hands caressing your sides, feeling the soft fabric of your baby pink tank top sending you shivers down your spine as the actions gives your brain ideas on what could those hands do. Just by thinking about it, sends tingle through your pussy as you start grounding your ass on his growing tent.

"Tommy, I think we should stop." You spoke in between the kiss.

"Hmm, why?" His lips captured your bottom lips, seductively tugging on them, as his eyes watches the way it bounces back once he lets go.

"I want you, but I'm on my period. It'll be a mess, besides, don't you find it disgusting?" Your voice sounded so soft and delicate, it almost came out as a squeak and he finds it adorable.

"I told you, I'm going to show you how I am yours, right? Then let me show you, baby." He muttered against your neck before he connected his lips to your sensitive flesh as you throw your head back rolling your eyes closed, your mouth fell agape letting out a moan.

His hands went to play with your clothed breasts before he tore the fabric off of your body, earning a gasp from you. He switched from your neck to snatch one of your nipples with his mouth, giving a light suck as the other he played with. You could never understand the anatomy of a woman's body, on why when men played with our breasts and giving them attention—an electricity will spark down to our pussy. Or is it just you?

You couldn't help but grind your hips against his bulge, circling and grounding to let him know that you really need him as soon as possible. But, he's taken his sweet time on getting you all worked up. He wants to prep you, before he goes on action.

"Tommy, please.."

"That's not my name, what's my name?" You whimpered, with a slap to your ass another one escaped.

"Need I remind you, baby?"

"Daddy, please. I need you, I need you to fuck me, now please." You pleaded.

"See, that wasn't so bad right?" He breathed. He switched both of you as you are now laying against the bed with him on top of you. He spread your legs as if its your wings, wide. He stands on his knees, palming his tent, looking at you with his jaw clenched.

“Now, I don’t care how messy it’s gonna get cause daddy’s gonna fuck you so good your pussy’s going to only want no one but me.”

[ashecampos]

ANYONE BUT HER 5

JANIS IMI-IKE X FEM READER

PART ONE PART TWO PART THREE

Warnings - smoking, alcohol, drugs, swearing, cheating, mentions of anxiety. janis being adorable.

The POV switches between reader and Janis (I use — when I change the POV)

there will be more parts to this, make sure to re-blog and comment and I will get the next few parts up as soon as I can, happy reading lovelies

[with Damien and the girls]

"so how do we get the two lovers together?" Damien turns to cady who is sat next to him jotting down math problems, she looks up and shrugs at the boy. "hey look its Tess" she says as the other girl comes running over to the two, phone in hand, her arms flailing, she looks like a loony as she plops herself down next to the two. "you will NEVER guess what i just walked in on" she screams dramatically, making the other two friends cringe. Damien catches a glimpse of the photo she has opened on her phone and practically screams. "TESSA GEORGE no you did not" he hits the girl multiple times as the girl holds the phone up to his face, revealing what she indeed did walk in on just moments ago. "this may be easier than we thought then guys" cady interrupts the others screaming. "shh Janis is coming she cant know our secret plan" Damien hushes the girls just in time as Janis reaches the tree and sits down.

"that girl will be the death of me" she sighs but is nudged by Damien "girl shut the hell up, you have been hopelessly in love with her since middle school, and the time when she gives you an ounce of attention you try to back away and pretend to hate her guts." he glares at his best friend while Cady and Tess sit watching in shock

"you should totally tell her , yes Bea has fucked with her for years but i know that you are good for her and she is good for you. i wont let you dismiss your feelings for my best friend." the taller girl nudges her as she gets up, her phone ringing in her hand.

"how would i even tell her?" Janis says looking at Tess, which in turn earns a shit eating grin from the other three teenagers.

Tess laughs while looking at her phone "look I'm going to go grab miss dramatic from the principle's office, i will see you guys later and we will scheme" she smirks while picking up the call and walking away from the trio.

////

"hey pookieee" i sing into the phone as i walk down the hallways looking for any of my friends and cautiously avoiding Shane or bea, wherever they may be lingering. "girl where are you? did someone leave you all high and dry in the bathrooms?" she asks in a mocking manner which made me laugh, earning a scowl from some random freshmen as i pass by them, i smile awkwardly back to them apologising. "nooo, i got called into Mr Duvall's office, meet me and ill spill the deets" i sigh into the phone, passing Regina who smiles at me. this school year has been so weird and its not even been a week.

turning the corner i see Tess, i hang up the call and she hugs me tightly. she abruptly latches onto my arm and drags us towards the doors to go outside onto the track field. we find a seat near the top of the empty bleachers and sit, taking out our lunch/snacks.

"right spill" she says while plopping a French fry in her mouth. "firstly, how did you get fries? secondly gimmie one then i shall tell you" i grin as she holds out a singular fry for me. i take it between my teeth and eat it before leaning forward ready to tell her my 'punishment' she waves her hands in a circular motion urging me to start talking as she shoves a few more fries into her mouth.

"okay so Shane, Bea and Jason came up to me in gym and Shane went to floor me but Janis pushed me out of the way. she's fine though, she wasn't touched. but because of that i kind of blacked out and went for him." i start explaining what happened but she points at me. "okay cute but I've been told what happened, but Janis tried to save you. Cute. plus that explains the bathroom" she laughs as i throw a piece of lettuce at her "gross, get your grubby veggie food away from me" she screams as it lands near her food, earning a cackle from me. "may i continue" i look at her smugly "yes yes but c'mon get the the point" she slaps my leg.

"so then he was like 'you have two options here, either you agree to this deal or your suspended' and he obviously didn't elaborate on said deal but i had no other choice" i say eating my salad while talking. "so what where your options?" she cuts me off "let me finish, he was like 'either i can suspend you or you must tutor Janis Imi-ike' so now i have to tutor her in gym, Spanish and drama" i say whilst pointing at her letting her know I'm done "so the deal worked out for you basically?" she points her fork at me with a shit eating smirk. "no it really didn't. Tess you don't understand, after you left the bathroom i ran from her." i put my head down, avoiding eye contact.

\\\\\\\\\\\\

[in the bathroom after Tess walked in on Janis and y/n]

"i totally just cockblocked yall" Tess shrieks happily before snapping a photo and running out of the bathroom. i look back to Janis being brought back to reality and panicking, i look away before grabbing my phone and bag before quickly turning back to her "i should probably go to see Mr Duvall before he sends out a search team, see you later" i look back at her, she nods and smiles a little as she picks up her own bag, throwing the paper towels in the trash.

\\\\\\\\\\\\

"YOU RAN? oh y/n seriously? you've been talking about her since that night you met her. and you fucking ran" Tess brings me back to reality by slapping my knee multiple times to get my attention. shrugging i continue to eat while she stares at me scheming "stop looking at me like that, yes i like her but i don't think she wants me like that" i try to justify my actions but she continues to stare at me, not saying a word. she grabs my hand as soon as we are done eating and drags me to the other end of the school, i see that we are headed in the direction of Janis, Damien and cady, i look at her with pleading eyes. "oh look what the cat dragged in" Damien speaks up first being the only one to click onto the fact that me and Tess came over, Janis looks over at me, her face going red before she looks back down at her cross stitch.

me and Tess sit down, Damien looks at me then back to Tess, smirking. those two will literally be the death of me with their scheming looks. "so little miss Joan jett, what's the news? how long are you suspended for?" the boy asks, making Janis' head shoot up, intrigued by the boys question and what i had to say about being sent to head office. "actually no, i made a deal" i smile proudly at the looks i get from the others, excluding Tess who already knew what happened. i look down at my phone and feel everyone's eyes on me "don't spare any details, what was the deal?" the boy pushes. i look at Janis and shake my head "hey can we talk for a second?" she nods and we stand up and walk over to a different tree "hey about earlier i-" she starts "the deal was that i have to tutor you" i smirk a little as she looks up at me a little baffled. "what do i need tutored in?" she laughs, her shoulders loosening a bit as she settles down, i lean against the tree and hand her the note Mr Duvall gave me to explain what the deal was, she takes a second to read it and scoffs with a hurt tone "drama? why do i need drama tutoring?" she looks up at me as if i should know which i shrug to "i know that's what i thought because you Janis Imi-ike are very dramatic" i point at her and she gasps "rude" she fakes being shot in the chest "heart-breaking even" i reply. she pulls out her phone, "our next class is Spanish right?" she queries, i nod "cool, sit with me?" she more demands than asks but regardless i agree.

we go back to sitting with the rest of our friends for the last ten minutes of lunch before the bell rang.

//////

we both sit down in the back of the classroom, the teacher smiling at us and greeting y/n in Spanish as she hands us some books, they keep a conversation in Spanish, the teacher laughing at whatever y/n is saying to her, the teacher, only say ten years older than us turns to me and smiles. "i assume you have been told about the tutoring programme that you have been placed in, y/n will be tutoring you in this and a few other classes to keep your grades up to ensure you don't fail" she then smiles at both of us and walks to greet other students who are still walking into the classroom. "what was that about?" i ask her while opening my book and looking down at the worksheet inside it. "she's friends with my dad" y/n shrugs "I've known her basically my whole life, don't worry she's really nice" the girl continues while she finishes the work sheet like it was something she's been doing for years "how are you so good at this, i don't get it" i laugh as she puts her pen down and looks over smirking as if it was meant to be obvious "Janis I'm Hispanic of course i know my language" she laughs as if stating an obvious fact, i just sat there staring at her, taking in her features, and her tanned skin. it was apparently obvious that she is Spanish but i just didn't notice or was too distracted to notice this major detail about the girl I've crushed on for like forever. just as the lesson is starting, the teacher is taking names. Tess and Aaron walk into the classroom, Aaron greets the teacher alike to how y/n did, Tess sits down who is followed by Aaron who sits next to her, y/n smiles at her best friend completely oblivious to what had just possibly happened. the teacher writes her name and class number on the board, everyone copies it onto their books, then the board shows a few questions in Spanish, a few words i recognise but the majority of them i don't have a clue on what they mean. i turn to y/n and she is nearly done with the work, she looks up and chuckles mouthing 'what' to me, i whisper "what the fuck does '¿Cómo estás?' mean?" i look at her while she laughs at me a little making me blush a little "how are you?" she asks me, i look at her, thinking she's joking "I'm not good, now tell me what it means" i whisper shout, she shakes her head "no that's literally what it means dumbass" she laughs while i write it down. and that's how the whole lesson went, me being confused and her laughing at me.

when the bell rang we all stood up, the teacher pulling y/n to the side to catch up, leaving me to wait outside of the class as y/n had told me to wait as we where going to our next tutoring session now. it took ten minutes for y/n and the teacher to bid their farewells, the two both walk out of the class and say bye to each other, y/n grabs my hand and turns me to face her with a mischievous smile on her perfect face "how do you feel about track?" she asks full of energy.

"when you said track i genuinely thought you where joking" i said out of breathe as she leads us to the athletics' field. she starts stretching, while i just stare, taking in the view, with it being golden hour, the sun it her skin perfectly and with what she was now wearing, her toned arms and legs flexed as she stretched and started jogging on the spot while looking at me. "if you don't start moving i will literally make you" she said with a hint of sarcasm "make me then" i say with a smirk, she shrugs and picks up her water bottle, taking off the lid and walking over to me. i quickly notice what she was doing and start backing away from her. she laughs as she gets closer to me. just as she gets a few inches away i grab the bottle and splash her with it. the freezing cold water drenching her head to toe. her white t-shirt turning see-through, showing her black Nike sports bra under it. she lets out a shriek while trying to pull the shirt over her head, when she gets it off i cant help but stare, while temporarily distracted she takes this opportunity to throw the rest of the water at me, along with her wet shirt, she laughs and runs off, i chuckle at her behaviour and take my hoodie off then run after her.

we end up on the 100m track part of the field and she is running backwards beside me, slowing down then speeding up when i catch up to her every so often. we do this for a good half an hour, making small talk "so are you doing the art show this year?" she asks, slowing down as we continue to run. "I'm considering it, are you planning on joining track? you would be really good at it" i say, trying my best to catch up to her again as she sped up a little. how she hasn't fallen over yet confuses me, but as I've learned today i don't know a lot about her.

/////

after two hours of Janis' constant complaining about running, we decide to call it quits for today, we sit on the field and she gets a phone call from Cady "Janis what do i do, Regina wants me to sit with her and the plastics at lunch for the rest of the week" to this Janis' face lights up, "oh my god this is amazing, you should definitely do it then report back to us telling us all the stupid shit they say" Janis continues to the girl, i try to keep myself entertained on my own phone as she convinces Cady to take up Regina's offer, my face drops as Cady says that she will do it.

heyy guys sorry again for the really short chapter,, i have terrible writers block, i will try write some more over the next week but i cant promise anyything as im at work until sunday now,, hope this was a good update,, sorry again lovelies <3

[sparklykirby]

Neuvillette, Zhongli, and Yin-Yang.

zhongli is fairly complex and looks to be an equal blend of both (with more reverence to yang should his connections to the heavens prevail over earthly connections/symbolisms). earth in general symbolizes yin (with regard to solely the heavens vs earth context in chinese philosophy), however, his undeniable associations with the sun and his celestial origins introduce very potent yang elements in equal measure.

Zhongli

Yin characteristics:

1. stability and reliability: as an earth-associated figure, zhongli embodies stability, always presenting a dependable, supportive, and firm presence.

2. connection to the material: earth represents the tangible, material world, reflecting zhongli’s role as the god responsible for the creation of mora and economic stability in the earthly realm.

3. his geo element: he regularly controls an element associated with the earthly realm: yin!

4. philosophical and reflective: he often displays deep philosophical thought, engaging in teachings and reflections about order and the general world. he’s calm and gently supportive to those he looks after and is usually never the aggressor.

5. his other form is part qilin: the qilin represents yin! or at least leans more toward it.

Yang characteristics:

1. celestial authority: as a figure who came from the heavens (not earth) and is still a leading god (no longer an archon, but i say leader because 1) xiao wouldn't still have to go to him for permission to do certain things and 2) zhongli says he still as a duty to care for humanity), zhongli embodies celestial authority and control, which are hallmarks of yang energy.

2. guiding light: just like the sun, he serves as a guiding light for liyue, directing its people towards prosperity and self-sufficiency. his role as a celestial being involves watching over and actively protecting liyue. his prominent, guiding influence continues to preside over liyue, even in his absence (yang).

3. dynamic influence: his lines and lore in cn refer a lot more to the heavens, one example being the phrase "heavens move, earth follows", aligning with yang qualities of authority over the earth and guiding its element(s).

4. intimidating presence: even when disguised as a human, others are too intimidated to talk to him. despite that, his strong reputation has most of the people he interacts with regard him with reverence.

5. he represents the eastern dragon (and directly refers to himself as a dragon, even after retiring and no longer interacting with humans as a god): the eastern dragon is an embodiment of yang. they're gentle in nature yes, but embody yang according to sources (especially heavenly dragons).

6. power: zhongli is notoriously known for being a ruthless warrior of formidable strength and a daunting reputation. he is extremely assertive when it comes to contracts and impartially enforcing them (which he prioritizes over all else when involved).

- as a minor detail, adeptal energy is also more ethereal in nature than elemental (so yang affiliated), and zhongli is noted to be their ancestor on top of not being from the earthly realm.

In conclusion, he is a perfect blend of both, with a slight lean to yang.

Neuvillette:

neuvillette is similar to zhongli but remains oh so different. unlike zhongli, neuvillette’s element(s) are solely associated with yin; he does not hold heavenly (yang) ties in the same way zhongli does.

Yang characteristics

1. leadership: as a sovereign, his leadership and authority over fontaine demonstrate yang characteristics of control and assertiveness. his unwavering commitment to his role as chief justice, ensuring justice and order, is a yang trait.

2. opposition to the heavenly principles: his proactive stance against the usurpation of authority by the heavenly principles shows a decisive, yang-like purpose and he intends to go through with that purpose with action...we don’t know when, but soon.

3. he’s supposed to represent a western dragon. these dragons are more aggressive and arrogant in comparison to their eastern counterparts.

4. commanding presence: despite reaching out for amiable interactions, he holds a somewhat intimidating presence at first impressions.

Yin Characteristics

1. judicial purpose: as chief justice, neuvillette embodies the yin quality of receptivity by focusing on balance and fairness in the system.

2. care for the melusines: his protective and nurturing attitude towards the melusines aligns with the yin aspects of care and empathy. his soft nature is referred to several times.

3. contemplative nature: neuvillette holds an introspective approach to just about everything. his duties and his thoughtfulness are rooted in trying to understand humanity to better understand himself (a major yin trait, his foundational purpose is associated with introspection). this reasoning is highly reflective, aligning with yin.

4. preference for subtle simplicities and sensitivity: his taste. his sensitive nature is noted by sigewienne and himself.

5. emotional depth: the care he shows for fontainians and his role connect to his emotional depth and feelings for others, core yin qualities. emotional depth is shown to be an overarching part of his character again and again; his emotions have a direct influence over the entirety of fontaine and its weather for example.

6. his element. water represents depth, fluidity, intuition, and the capacity to flow and adapt, all of which align with yin characteristics. in most sources, water is solely referred to as a yin element.

- as a minor detail, his sq has yin written all over it! literally everything about it is sourced back to neuvillette’s own internal conflict/introspection (wriothesley helps in pointing this out, too). it is one of the only major quests/sqs that do not have us fighting a big bad, the main resolution ultimately lies in assuaging neuvillette’s internal conflict that paints his perspective of the world around him.

- the primordial sea, which he rules over and is of him, is referred to as “amniotic fluid” (the fluid that only exists to support a fetus) which undeniably connects to womb symbolism (supporting this is the fact the sea is the source of all terrestrial life on the planet!).

in conclusion, neuvillette embodies a nuanced mix of both yin and yang qualities, while leaning slightly more to yin.

PS: i almost forgot about his voiceline detailing the intimate connection himself and his vishaps have with the moon, a yin figure!

PPS: just a funny detail: he detests the sun.

[yourtoradorasextendedwarranty]

No. It's not Cancel Culture.

I've seen a lot of people recently saying that the right is embracing cancel alter. Which is actually kind of funny to me because that's never what cancel culture meant.

Long story short cancel culture as a topic or rather, as a phrase was basically invented for one very specific purpose. Cancel culture was invented to a culture of taking stuff from people's past, digging it up by going through various different social media websites blogs or other things, and then posting it online in a very public forum and then demanding others share that to that person's workplace.

"Are you in your 40s - 70s now? Well did you ever do blackface once upon a time when it was not seen as an absolutely atrocious thing to do? Well guess what we are going to do everything in our power to get you fired from your job. Ruin your life. Make sure that you can never make income ever again. And we're also going to try to get your family removed from their livelihoods as well."

"Are you a race car driver? Did your dad say the n-word once before? Did he do it before you were ever born? Well we're going to remove your sponsors and make sure that it is harder for you to have a life because the sins of the father are the sins of the son".

"Do you have an opinion on LGBT things that we don't like? Are you one of those gay people from the past who think that it should have been called a gay partnership rather than gay marriage? Well we are going to make sure that your life going forward as an absolute living hell and that you are not considered part of the LGBT community despite the fact that you were probably there fighting for the rights to be considered normal before any of us were ever born."

Those things generally speaking are what we refer to as cancel culture. Digging things up from 3 to 5 years ago or longer and then bringing them to people you know are absolutely willing (and often incited) to call businesses and jobs and other things and get that person removed from polite society as an entirety.

However, cancel culture is not posting something publicly to a social media site as a way to inform (yes there's a difference. The moderates don't incite. You all do) With no calls to action. Just saying "hey these people exist", and yes there people taking it on themselves to tell businesses that their employees advocate for violence. Because fun fact about speech. I am for freedom of speech under the laws of the Constitution. However calls to action are not free speech. Truth is, a lot of the people who have been fired should have actually been arrested. Because it's not a joke when you tell someone to try it again or to do it again or saying "next time" knowing the implication.

Because if that same exact thing had happened with Joe Biden and you had a bunch of Fringe lunatics on the right saying "next time don't miss", they would be in solitary confinement for the rest of their lives because the justice system leans heavily in favor of democrat power. So, the right is finally learning their lesson. Which is that if a person doesn't support your rights to speak you don't defend theirs. And I know that there are going to be people who don't agree with that. They are going to say that that's not moral or not principled. But you know why I don't care? Because I'm not on the right. And because I actually support free speech. But here's the problem.

If you willingly defend the rights of people who would take your rights away at a heartbeat that's not being called principled that's called being a moron. Because if you were to save someone knowing they would willingly kill you in the same given situation you're not winning any victories. You're not doing yourself any favors. Have some semblance of self-preservation.

Because I can promise you, there is no point in having morals or principles at all if they are only going to be utilized as a weapon against you. Am I saying that you should forsake your morals or forsake your principles? No. I'm saying that if there are other people who value living in polite society the same as you and they would defend you if you were in need then you can defend them when they are in need. You can still have morals and principles. I'm not saying don't.

But stop letting it be a weapon against you. Because when you let it be a weapon against you, all you do is tie yourself down to be beaten. Your morals and principles will mean nothing if you're in a gulag or you're dead. So, forgive me if I am not apologetic towards the people who asked for an act of extreme violence to happen again. Because what was it that the leftist used to call it? Not "cancel culture" but "consequence culture". If a business does not want to keep you employed with them because you publicly express violent rhetoric, that's their right.

Because what was it that Destiny said whenever people got banned when they said learn to code? "It's a private company they can do what they want". Well guess what Destiny. Kick banned you and they can do what they want. Twitter demonetized you and they can do what they want. If you can't stand up for other people's rights whenever you have power you do not deserve to have people who actually value those rights stand up for you when you're not in power anymore.

[bunniebubbleswrites]

Hiya bunnie how are you?

I hope your well..I was wondering if I could request a Larissa x FemReader where reader has a lot of nightmares that keep her up so she doesn’t sleep well, really ever..so therefore our beloved principle catches her awake at extremely late hours of the night?

Thank you!!

Much love ❤️

Nightmares

Larissa Weems x F! Reader

A/N: I am doing great! This was actually super fun to write! I also have trouble sleeping so I thought this request was kind of funny!

Warnings: None it's just pure fluff

Words: 1905

5:30 am

You laid awake in your bed staring at the dark ceiling, every time you closed your eyes it was just nightmare after nightmare. You couldn’t remember the last time you had actually gotten a good night's sleep. It was always a few hours here and a few hours there. You sighed and pulled the comforter off yourself. You sat on the edge of your bed staring down into the darkness. 

You glanced up at the digital alarm clock, the glowing numbers read 5:30. You had to be up in half an hour anyways. You leaned over your nightstand and turned your light on. 

You walked over towards your wardrobe and pulled out a long sleeve dress that went down to your ankles. You slipped it on over your head and grabbed your tennis shoes and put them by the door before heading into the bathroom that was attached to your bedroom. 

You looked at yourself in the mirror and the dark bags under your eyes were more evident than ever. You grabbed your makeup bag from the counter and dug through it looking for your concealer. You would hide the fact that you had trouble sleeping forever if you had to. You skillfully applied the concealer under your eyes and blended it out with your finger. 

5:50 am

You walked back into your bedroom and walked over to your nightstand and grabbed your watch off your nightstand and slipped it onto your wrist adjusting it to make sure it stayed in its place. You looked down at your watch, checking the time. You walked over the door and slipped on your shoes and looked through your bag making sure you had everything for your classes that day. 

“The Picture of Dorian Gray, notebook, pencil case, computer, keys. Ok I have everything.” You mumbled to yourself as you grabbed your cardigan off of the trunk at the end of your bed and slipped it on. Grabbing your bag you slipped out of your room and checked your watch once again. 

6:01 am

You had plenty of time to go set up your classroom and make your way back to the staff room to get coffee. You made your way out of the hall where all the teacher’s sleeping quarters were and started for your classroom. 

6:13 am

It was a quick 12 minute walk from the teacher’s sleeping quarters to your classroom. It was a walk you made every day. You knew the path by heart. You pulled out your keys and unlocked your classroom door. Once you walked into the classroom you flicked the lights on setting down your bag in your desk chair. You went over to the windows and opened up the blinds letting some natural light filter into your classroom. 

You walked back over to your desk, pulling out your computer and setting it on your desk along with the book your students were reading, and your notebook and pencil case on the side next to them. 

You set your bag down next to your desk and looked over your classroom and noticed that the floor needed to be swept so you went over to a closet in the back of the room and pulled out a broom and dust pan. Sweeping the floor only took about ten minutes. 

6:45 am

You checked your watch once again and decided your classroom was in good enough shape. The floor had been swept, the desk cleaned off. You grabbed your keys off your desk and locked the room behind you as you left. 

You walked towards the staff room hearing the chatter of your colleagues grow louder as you got closer. You walked into the room and there sat at the table was Larissa, Marilyn and Vlad. You gave them all a small smile and walked over to one of the cupboards that was above the coffee machine. 

You looked up into the cupboard looking for your mug and you found it on a shelf you could not reach. Not wanting to pull anyone away from their conversation, you stood on the tips of your toes trying to reach your mug on the top shelf wondering who put it there in the first place. 

You felt a presence behind you as you saw a pale hand reach for your mug and gently hand it to you, her hand brushing yours. “Thank you Larissa.” 

“It’s not a problem, you could have asked for help earlier.” She smiled at you as she reached for the coffee pot. 

“I don’t know who put it up there.” You laughed slightly, your face flushing just slightly. She offered to pour your coffee for you and you gladly accepted. She took the mug from your hands and poured the rest of what was left in the pot into your mug. 

She handed it back to you and set it on the counter and walked over to the fridge and pulled out the creamer. 

“Hey, guys I'm finishing off the creamer, I'll go out on Saturday and get some more.” You looked at the group sitting at the table. 

You poured the last of the coffee creamer into your mug and threw the container away.  You started another pot of coffee and went to sit down at the table with the other three people in the room. 

“You seem awfully energetic today.” Vlad said as you sat down at the table with a wide smile on your face. You glanced up at the coach and shook your head bashfully. 

“It’s the coffee I guess.” You laughed lightly in response while taking a sip of your coffee. 

8:00 am

You sat at your desk as students filled in for the hour. The bell rang through the classroom and you stood from your desk and addressed the students. 

“Okay class, take out your books and we’ll continue our reading from yesterday, after you all are finished we can have a class discussion about it.” You said giving them a smile and sitting back at your desk to finish grading papers. 

For a lot of your classes it was just the students doing independent work or catching up on things they missed or had not turned in yet. Lunch came and went and then classes resumed. 

4:07 pm

Finally the end of your day. You stood from your desk for the final time that day stretching out your stiff limbs. You closed your computer and packed up your things, running over everything to make sure you wouldn’t have to come back later. 

You slung your cardigan over your arms as you locked up your classroom. You yawned and made your way back to your quarters. Once inside you put everything in its rightful place. You walked over to your wardrobe and pulled out some thin gray sweats and a black tank along with a hoodie you had stolen from your dad a while back. 

You made your way over to the small kitchenette all the teachers had in their room. Of course you could use the big kitchen but this one was just more convenient. You grabbed out a pan from one of the bottom cabinets and filled it with water and waited for it to start boiling. Pasta again tonight. 

10:48 pm

You sat on your bed with a book in your hands, you turned the last page and let out a sigh. That's the third book you’ve finished this week and it was only Tuesday. You closed the book and set it on your night stand. You pulled the comforter over you. You were determined to get at least a good three hours of sleep tonight. 

12:58 am

You had been tossing and turning for hours, or that's what it seemed to be. You sat up, maybe some tea would help. You slipped on your shoes and made your way down to the teachers lounge. You had put your mug in place that you could actually reach this time. 

You pulled your mug out of the cupboard along with the tea and found the kettle to put some water on. You sat at the table in the lounge just scrolling away on your phone before you knew it, it was already 1 am. 

1:30 am

You were sipping on your tea and scrolling through your phone. You hadn’t seen her come in, you hadn't even heard the door open. You only noticed her presence when she had spoken. 

“(Y/N), what are you doing up so late?” Larissa was leaning on the door frame, her hair was down. It was a lot longer than you thought it would be. You shyly smiled at her. 

“Couldn’t sleep.” You replied slightly holding up to show her your mug of tea. She smiled back at you and walked over towards you, sitting across from you. 

“Care to tell me why you couldn’t sleep?” Larissa asked you her blue eyes looking deeply into yours. 

“This might sound kind of silly,” You stopped mid sentence embarrassed. You looked at her as she nodded for you to keep going. “I couldn’t sleep because I was having nightmares.” You let out a pitiful laugh and looked back down to the mug in your hands. 

“No, it’s not silly at all,” Larissa gave you some positive reassurance. “Maybe we could go for a walk, just until you get tired.” 

You nodded and pocketed your phone. The two of you stood from the table in the staff room and walked out, your mug forgotten on the table. 

2:10 am

You and Larissa found yourself sitting in her office on the couch in front of the fireplace. Your head was resting on her shoulder and you just listened to her talk, you weren’ t even sure what she was talking about anymore all you knew was that you were tired. 

“(Y/N), do you want to rest your head on my lap?” 

“Hm?” You looked up at her in a haze of sleep. She let out a small laugh and placed a kiss on your forehead. 

You put your head back on her shoulder and she rested her head on your own, her own hand slipping into yours. 

6:10 am 

You woke up on the couch of Larissa’s office. Your face flushed when the memories from the night before came flooding back into your memory. 

“Oh good, you’re awake. Here I made you some tea.” She hands you a mug and you take it from her. 

“Thank you Larissa, that was the best I've slept in a while.” You smiled up at her as she sat down next to you. 

“The next time you have trouble sleeping, you’re more than welcome to come find me.” 

You nodded letting out a hum letting her know you understood the offer as you set your mug down on the floor. 

You both looked at each other for a moment before you pressed your lips to hers, your hands finding their way to her cheeks. It took a second but Larissa kissed back. 

“Oh my god I- I shouldn’t have-” 

“(Y/N) it’s okay,” Larissa flushed just slightly. “I’ve wanted to do that for a while actually.” 

You let out a small laugh as you took her hands in yours. You were never happier that you had been caught last night.