#50s queer life

[itsallmadonnasfault]

Audience reactions at the 2003 MTV VMAs performance of Like A Virgin/Hollywood by Madonna, Britney Spears, Christina Aguilera, and Missy Elliott

[merrysithmas]

paul "if john was gay i wouldve known he wouldve hit on me!" mccartney

🤝

john "im not GAY but i constantly hit on paul. it doesnt appear to be coming across. that must mean he's straight too" lennon

/youre bad at it and he's bad at it and that's gay love in the oppressive 1960s straight hegemony baby!

[shushmal]

time is a circle i used to write fics where stiles (teenwolf) was the little brother to the winchesters (supernatural) and i just thought about steve being from a hunter family and that's why his parents are never around and he's kinda naturally good at fighting monsters but not humans. steve harrington long lost cousin to the winchesters... dean was born in 79 and steve was probably born around 67 IM SORRY STEVE HARRINGTON BABYSITTING DEAN AND SAM WINCHESTER steve has loser older brother vibes no matter what huh TIME IS A CIRCLE

[danggirlronpa]

Peko?

I don't think Peko recognizes herself as queer until well into her 30s, maybe even her 40s. Peko lives a life mired in repression. She's not very GOOD at making herself an emotionless tool, but any time she feels attraction towards Either of the Kuzuryu siblings, it is tied up in a complex knot of loyalty and guilt and desire to be Useful. Her relationships with the rest of the class are punctuated by the knowledge that she will always put the clan above them, 100% of the time. Peko can have no romance without guilt as a teen. It's part of what makes Peko ships so deliciously tragic.

With all of those hangups going on, I honestly think Peko doesn't even consider romance or sex in ANY capacity for at least half her life. There's so much else to unpack first. She has so much to do, so much to unlearn and so much to learn. It's not even on her radar. She'd just shrug if asked. But no one ever asks. Because she's Peko. She just radiates She's Just Not That Into You. She's got her queerplatonic thing with Fuyuhiko, and that's all she needs. Actual Sexuality Irrelevant. Swords First.

Once she does have a chance to think about it, though - sees that Ibuki and Fuyuhiko have started going grey and realizing she thinks that's kind of hot - Peko is the type of person who would want a rigidly defined sexuality with which to associate. I think she very quickly and with little fanfair comes to the conclusion that she likes men and women. And I think it would change almost nothing about her life except that the next June Ibuki hands her a little pin, because Ibuki has a gaydar with 99.99% accuracy.

[ialwaysknewyouwerepunk]

.

[oceanwithinsblog]

been very busy with life (read: self-deprecating) lately, i've applied to so many job offers and got very few answers, it's so hard to move on from this "job hunting phase" :( :/

on the bright side, i'm finding new energies and strength in skz's music, in re-reading good omens (2014 edition) and binge-watching shows like queer eye and brooklyn-99. i'm also pretty sure i'll resume my studies this upcoming fall, i'm excited and very very frightened atst but i wanna believe it's worth it ^^

ps. also !!! i've been meditating on getting tattoos but as thrilled as i am to the idea i also find it hard to compromise on something to be permanent on my skin throughout this ever-changing life :)

[problemcore]

ahem. im ok now . goodnight

[mars-ipan]

y’know i think the most annoying thing about trying to discuss reproductive rights with cis people is the complete and utter refusal to include trans people in the discussion. like they will only ever say “women” and if you dare to point it out it’s “well this is all being done to control women” or “‘people with vaginas’/‘people assigned female at birth’ is way too wordy” it drives me fucking crazy

like first off do you seriously think that the people who seek to remove bodily autonomy from women have nothing against trans people. do you think they hold zero ill will towards us. also do you think they view trans afabs as anything other than women.

secondly. NOBODY IS ASKING YOU TO USE BIG WORDY PHRASES LITERALLY JUST SAY “PEOPLE” INSTEAD OF “WOMEN.” WE LITERALLY JUST DON’T WANT TO BE EXCLUDED FROM THIS BECAUSE WE ARE ALSO BEING HURT WE JUST WANT SOME GODDAMN SOLIDARITY IN THIS BITCH. LIKE ACTUALLY JUST FUCKING SAY “PEOPLE” IT SAVES EVERYONE FROM WEIRD LOOPHOLES AND ALSO ENFORCES THAT WOMEN ARE PEOPLE FOR FUCK’S SAKEEEEE

[variousqueerthings]

hate to give it to the old white guy, but alan alda’s character is right in this movie when he says: look during my first marriage I was a shitty partner, because I was a bad father, I was absent during the whole pregnancy because I hate thinking about birth and get uncomfortable by anatomy and blood, and I stress smoked and it just got worse after the kid was born and now I’m too old for a kid on top of that, I’ll be an old man by the time the kid is out of highschool and I don’t want that, I am literally a grandfather! but I really really love you, I want to be honest with you, because I love you”

and his partner is like, “no you’ll totally be great, I believe in you, and also otherwise I’ll leave you,” and so he says, ok I will try, but... no. nonononooo  

and now he is showing that everything he said is true and she seems surprised. some straight nonsense, but I kinda am into the story being quite honest that a baby does not suddenly change someone’s personality

I do expect a last minute change of narrative on this front, but it’s nice to see portrayed honestly while it lasts

[housedyke]

If I make really cute big eyes 🥺 and tell you that my birthday's next Friday 🥺🥺 will you buy me kitschy bedroom decor from ebay 🥺🥺🥺

[imabiscuitinthousandworlds]

okay but it's so sad that jean lives during the great depression, otherwise could have him make so many super dry and sudden gay jokes with a straight (ha) face occasionally, just rarely enough to catch people off guard every time, and make that his prime source of amusement bc he may be a repressed depressed traumatised bastard but he does have a sense of humour. alas. i am bound by a homophobic timeframe. what a bummer

[ihearasound]

Feel like I'm going insane

[lilyliveredlittlerichboy]

i know ive said this a million times a million ways and so have many others in this site but it bears repeating, especially since we have an influx of new or returning users.

Hating men doesn't make you progressive.

Hating men makes the work of bio/gender essentialists* easier.

Hating men is exactly what the patriarchy wants you to do.

Afraid of men is exactly what the patriarchy wants you to be.

Cut it out. It's not progressive. Treat the men in your life with the same care and compassion you would extend to women/non-men.

Also stop assuming that everyone who isn't fully a man doesn't want to be seen as one. Stop assuming that genderfluid, nonbinary or multigender men are not men and want to reject the label of man. Most of us don't.

Loving men is revolutionary. Humanising men is revolutionary. Showing men grace, compassion and humanity is revolutionary.

Hating men sets us back into last century.

Cut it out.

*Bio essentialism is transphobia, terfery and radical feminism: men were born with a penis/xy therefore they are violent and gross and evil, which can never be changed.

Gender essentialism is what we call Baeddelism: Men are evil, testosterone makes you evil, trans men gain privilege by transitioning and this makes them evil too. Trans women are delicate flowers etc

And of course we have the garden variety sexism which would love to have you believe that men are strong and aggressive who need to provide, and women are weak delicate flowers who should only do housework and childcare.

These 3 positions have so much in common and none of them are progressive and all of them set back women's rights, queer rights and men's rights by decades.

Once more for luck:

Cut it out.

[ween-kitchens]

we need more queer adults/elderly people being the main characters in tv and movies (especially slice of life) I don’t want to feel like my life is on a time limit before i’m even 20

[scientia-rex]

For the most part, my approach to prescribing hormones is “sure,” but I will note that the one thing I lean HARD on patients about is smoking. If you’re transgender, and you’re on hormones, the number one thing we want to protect is your cardiovascular health. That’s frankly the number one thing I want to protect in all my patients, but anyone taking exogenous hormones is at higher baseline risk. And the best thing you can do for your heart is DON’T SMOKE. It’s a bitch to quit, and I didn’t even smoke much or long before I quit in my late teens, and I STILL didn’t enjoy quitting and had smoking dreams for years. It’s harder to quit than just about anything else up to and including crack and heroin, and that’s coming from a patient of mine who recently passed in her early 60s who’d done all of those things—for years and years—but eventually was able to quit everything except smoking. And that killed her. She developed severe COPD and eventually called to say her blood oxygen saturation was dipping into the 70s, which is incompatible with life. She was lucid enough to decline medical care, including refusing to call 911 or go to the ER. A week later, after both I and one of our outreach nurses had contacted her to ask her to please go to the ER, I got a notification that she’d been found dead. She had been so frustrated that she wasn’t a candidate for a lung transplant.

One of my oldest trans patients is in her late 50s. She’s had blood clots that went to the lungs. Repeatedly. Smoking raises that risk. Estrogen raises that risk. She’s a veteran with PTSD; of course she smoked.

These aren’t theoretical. These are humans I’ve cared for over years of their lives. I have been rooting for them—my beloved former addict, who spoke without shame about her years of homelessness and drug use in the city; my queer elders, who are slowly trading in their motorcycles for power scooters. I want everyone to live their fullest, best life.

Smoking doesn’t fit into that. Please don’t smoke. I don’t want you to die like that—not now and not later. I want you to have the future that you may not be able to see yet, but exists.

Since I moved home as an out queer, word got out, and there’s a whole apartment complex of lesbians in their 60s to their 80s who come see me—sitting next to their wives in the office, nagging about blood pressure meds, tattling about not having gotten the shingles shot they said they would. To be clear, when I was growing up in town, I knew no lesbians. Not one. I knew one gay kid in my class, which eventually turned into two. We were it. To see these women living decades with their wives and being able to squabble like any couple in my office over who was supposed to bring their home blood pressure cuff in for us to check it… it means the world to me.

[fandomsandfeminism]

Yall wanna hear a kinda funny, kinda sad story about my grandmother and hetero-normativity?

Ok, so... when my grandmother was in her 50s (I was an infant), she met a woman at the Unitarian Church. And, as can happen when you meet your soul mate, this event made it impossible for her to deny parts of herself that she had fiercely hidden her whole life.

All the drama- their affair being found out, the divorce with my grandfather, the court battle over who got the house, happened while I was a baby. Even in my earliest memories, it's just Mama Jo and Oma, and my grandfather lived elsewhere (first his own apartment, then a nursing home, then with us.)

But here's the thing- no one ever explained any of this to me. No one ever sat down and was like "hey, Rosie, so do you know what a lesbian is?" It was the 90s. It was Texas. I think my mom was still kinda processing all this, and just assumed that like... I was gonna figure it out. Don't mention it, let it just be normal. Like I think my mom thought that if she explained the situation, she would be making it weird? I dunno.

But like. In the 90s, in all the movies I had seen and books I had read, do you know how many same sex couples I had seen? Like. 0. Do you know how many "platonic best friend/roommates" I had seen? A lot. I had no context, is what I'm saying.

I literally thought this was a Golden Girls, roommates, besties situation until I was like...I dunno, 11? 12?

It was actually their parrot, an African Grey named Spike, imitating my grandmothers voice saying "Johanna, honey, it's getting late", that triggered the MIND BLOWN moment as I realized that *there's only one master bedroom and it only has 1 waterbed* when all the pieces finally clicked.

Anyway. I think it's a real important thing for kids to know queer people exist, for a lot of reasons, but also because kids can be clueless and it's embarrassing to have your grandmother be outted by a parrot because everyone just thought you'd figure it out on your own.

Anyway, here is my grandma and her wife, my Oma, after they moved to Albuquerque to be artsy gay cowboys and live their best life. They helped run a "Lesbian Dude Ranch" out there (basically just with funding and financial support. As Oma has explained "traditionally, most lesbians don't have a lot of money" so they wrote the checks and let the younger ladies actually run the ranch.)