#AC Unity Duel

[damez1979]

Arno CONFRONTS His Former Mentor In A DEADLY Duel!

[astrojulia]

Exploring the Depths of Swords Arcana

~ Insights and Interpretations

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Introduction to Swords Arcana

The sword's essence truly manifests itself within the crucible of combat and dueling. Envisioning "lightweight" scenes would undermine its inherent purpose, for the sword's function thrives in battle and warfare. These blades seek conflict, striving for victory on the battlefield. Crafted with dual blades, the metal embodies a cutting edge and a dualistic universe. These symbols of warriors endeavor to convey their perspective, even enduring pain, where survival often hinges on a kill-or-be-killed mentality.

Disclaimer: The way I learned to read tarot cards does not involve the use of upright and reversed positions. Instead, they rely on their symbology, positive and negative meanings, and the readings depend more on the spread rather than whether the card is upright or reversed. Also, the Court Cards will also have its separate post and I’m using Rider-Waite as reference.

Ace of Spades

Symbolism: The ace, denoting unity and the inception of concepts, is entwined with the Air element (yang). This synergy births the genesis of ideas, showcasing the active force behind their inception and their influence on our mental realm. Such ideas arise from fleeting moments, mirroring the sword's grasp, connecting to the phallic symbol, signifying assertion. It exhibits agility and fluidity through its form, accompanied by nobility represented by the crown.

Positive Aspects: This card signifies the emergence of impactful ideas and noble intentions. It encompasses words, plans, and ethical principles vocalized by individuals. Illuminating thoughts underscore its essence, driven by persistent contemplation. The ace heralds the commencement of fruitful conversations, dialogues, or even disagreements. A quest for righteousness is evident, guided by the urge to express what is perceived as right. Engaging in argumentation and asserting one's will takes center stage, underpinned by the necessity for courteous, direct, and noble communication.

Ace of Spades: In this context, the negative connotation reflects unfulfilled principles and groundless ideas. Such fleeting concepts are akin to a "flash in the pan," lacking in substance. Dishonorable and deceitful words accompany these notions, sowing disorder and distress. Antagonistic ideas fuel endless debates, potentially leading to harmful intentions or superficial propositions. The inability to wield a sword metaphorically signifies a lack of defense or empowerment.

2 of Swords

Symbolism: The number two emerges from the unity of one, representing a dualistic, opposing nature. The delicate equilibrium is disrupted as divergent ideas contend for supremacy. Depicted is a figure bearing the weight of swords, symbolizing the challenge of decision-making. The moon and water elements evoke emotional detachment, urging logical discernment. Blindfolded, impartiality prevails, underscoring the significance of thoughtful positioning.

Positive Aspects: This card embodies truces, agreements, and harmonious resolutions. It underscores the value of diplomacy, facilitating consensus and informed choices. The card encourages steadfastness in decision-making and the careful balance between emotional and rational faculties. Diplomatic interactions with diverse individuals and groups, along with honorable conflicts, are encouraged. Well-crafted competition and stimulating rivalry fuel intellectual growth, fostering teamwork and camaraderie. The card suggests favorable judgments and well-reasoned decisions.

Negative Aspects: On the flip side, hesitation, doubt, and emotional indecision take center stage. The impartiality, when taken to an extreme, fosters unethical behavior and truce-related challenges. Disregarding empathy for differing perspectives hinders harmony, leading to superficial interactions and a lack of understanding. The card cautions against evading responsibility and shying away from comprehensive evaluations.

3 of Spades

Symbolism: The number three signifies the synthesis of unity and duality, birthing new ideas through opposing forces. In this context, the card portrays a novel notion arising from these forces, akin to the formulation of a decisive sentence. Despite potential pain or discomfort, consensus remains crucial. The heart symbolizes the challenge, as emotional attachments might hinder logical resolution.

Positive Aspects: The card signifies relief following a resolute decision-making process. It encourages embracing responsibility, prioritizing collective well-being over personal privilege. Delving deep into the core of issues and resolving them swiftly is urged, emphasizing direct and efficient approaches. The card celebrates the courage to stand by one's values and the willingness to engage in benevolent actions, even if they entail personal sacrifice.

Negative Aspects: Anguish and despair arise from indecision and the burden of responsibility. Ineffectual attempts at problem-solving lead to mental agony. The absence of creativity, failure to achieve consensus, and inability to focus on a singular idea impede progress. The card warns against neglecting diverse perspectives, resulting in missed opportunities for growth and understanding.

4 of Swords

Symbolism: The number four introduces order to the realm of ideas, a challenge for the airy element. To become a productive force, air requires motion and direction. Thus, the card conveys a hushed tranquility, analogous to a serene church setting. It serves as a pause for strategic contemplation, a call to hone one's skills, and an invitation for introspective reconfiguration.

Positive Aspects: This card encourages introspection, thoughtful analysis, and strategic reorganization. Taking a break to rest and restore mental clarity is advised. Meditation and silence facilitate deeper reflection, allowing ideas to crystallize and insights to emerge. Prioritizing observation over discourse fosters efficient idea generation and encourages the development of practices that enhance cognitive clarity.

Negative Aspects: Stagnation, repetitiveness, and a lack of innovation permeate the air. The card warns against fixating on static, unproductive ideas. It discourages excessive sleep or detachment, which hinder effective communication and constructive action. The chasm between intention and execution is evident, underscoring the importance of aligning thoughts with tangible efforts.

5 of Swords

Symbolism: The number five signifies an attempt to transcend limitations, often leading to inexperience and failure. The card depicts a scene of defeat, where an individual encounters more adept adversaries, resulting in loss. The pursuit of reasoning with others reveals the unpreparedness, leading to a fallen argument. The imagery portrays a thwarted endeavor, highlighting the ephemeral nature of such endeavors.

Positive Aspects: Amid defeat, there's resilience and partial preservation. Although the battle is lost, the war remains. The card advises relinquishing harmful ideas, recognizing the potential for future success. Lessons learned from failures guide future actions, urging meticulous evaluation and adjustment. The card emphasizes persistence and growth despite setbacks.

Negative Aspects: Unprepared and futile attempts mar the landscape, leading to loss, frustration, and difficulty. The card cautions against hasty actions and irrational pursuits, promoting negative outcomes. Pessimism and self-sabotaging tendencies hinder progress, reinforcing the importance of measured, strategic endeavors.

6 of Swords

Symbolism: The number six embodies reparation and reconciliation, offering a chance to seek refuge and new perspectives. Depicted is the act of rescuing individuals from shame and guiding them toward safe havens. This card symbolizes the quest for harmony among conflicting ideas, advocating introspection and the mending of one's convictions.

Positive Aspects: The card heralds a period of healing, restoration, and finding solace. It encourages seeking alternative paths and viewpoints, striving for inner and external harmony. Support from others aids the journey toward clarity and resolution. Embracing change and transformation facilitates growth and renewal.

Negative Aspects: A retreat in shame, evading confrontation and hiding from self-awareness, becomes prominent. The card advises against avoidance and self-imposed isolation, which hinder growth and understanding. Dwelling on difficulties and resisting change further impede progress, promoting stagnation and personal loss.

7 of Swords

Symbolism: The number seven embodies persistence and belief, emphasizing the power of steadfastness. In the realm of air, believing is seeing. The card showcases the strength of persistence, rooted in logical reasoning and problem-solving. The imagery portrays selective focus, leaving behind unnecessary issues to address core problems.

Positive Aspects: The card urges vigilance and strategic thinking. It emphasizes using intelligence to one's advantage, remaining diplomatic, and asserting one's perspective with flexibility. The number seven symbolizes unwavering dedication to one's beliefs and employing diverse tactics to communicate and persuade.

Negative Aspects: Persisting in error or faulty beliefs takes center stage. Impulsivity and a lack of diplomacy hinder effective communication. Engaging in tangential arguments and altering points for convenience are discouraged. The card warns against adopting a cynical viewpoint, lacking trust in one's intuition, and attempting to appease others at the expense of authenticity.

8 of Swords

Symbolism: The number eight reflects a doubling of four, highlighting the establishment of order and productivity. However, it struggles to integrate effectively with the airy element. The imagery portrays an individual surrounded by diverse ideas, expressing a willingness to defend personal convictions. This card signifies a challenge to confront and assess one's beliefs.

Positive Aspects: The card emboldens one to face opposing opinions and challenges. It advocates stepping onto the stage of challenge, drawing upon inner courage to evaluate one's beliefs and actions. The number eight emphasizes introspection and self-awareness, encouraging the exploration of diverse viewpoints to refine one's perspective.

Negative Aspects: Fear-induced paralysis prevails, impeding growth and progress. The card warns against succumbing to false truths or succumbing to external pressures. Paralysis by one's own or others' opinions prevents open communication and hinders the authentic expression of thoughts. It calls for breaking free from self-imposed constraints to foster personal growth.

9 of Swords

Symbolism: The number nine symbolizes mature and evolved thought stemming from the unity of one. This card portrays an individual deep in thought, encapsulating a mature mental state where responsibilities and ideas carry weight. Astrological symbols on the quilt suggest celestial guidance, underscoring the connection between life's signs and profound inquiries.

Positive Aspects: Deep contemplation and profound meditation are the hallmarks of this card. It champions methodical problem-solving, offering a path to practical resolutions. Seeking guidance through prayer and introspection facilitates mental clarity and wise decision-making. The number nine signifies embracing responsibility and harnessing wisdom to navigate life's challenges.

Negative Aspects: The card cautions against clinging to outdated or immature perspectives. It signifies mental distress, phobias, and unsettling thoughts that hinder rational thinking. A lack of sleep, mental unrest, and a single-minded fixation on distressing thoughts pervade, hindering sound judgment and emotional well-being.

10 of Swords

Symbolism :The number ten encapsulates the culmination of experiences within the suit, often leading to a decisive outcome. The imagery depicts a figure pierced by swords, signifying a significant end or transition. While defeat may be apparent, a new day dawns, symbolized by the rising sun and a fresh sword, heralding renewal and potential growth.

Positive Aspects: This card signifies triumph and conquest, wherein opposing ideas succumb to one's convictions. Problems are resolved, and obstacles are overcome. The number ten celebrates the strength of will, organization, and focused effort. It signifies the ability to take decisive action and reap the rewards of perseverance.

Negative Aspects: The card symbolizes defeat, ruin, and the cessation of progress. Overcoming difficulties becomes a daunting task as obstacles pile up. The number ten cautions against tyrannical thinking, arrogance, and the risk of ignoring opposing perspectives. It warns against allowing fear and negativity to paralyze progress.

Extra Sources: Tarot images by comparativetarot

(CC) AstroJulia Some Rights Reserved

[apiswitchcraft]

tarot patterns

SUITS

Cups= Water Signs -Communication and relationships

Wands= Fire Signs -Enterprise and love

Swords= Air Signs -Ideas and challenges

Pentacles= Earth Signs -Monetary transactions

UPRIGHT

4 Kings: great honor 3 Kings: consultation 2 Kings: minor counsel Majority Kings: meetings

4 Queens: great debate 3 Queens: deception, especially by a woman 2 Queens: sincere friends Majority Queens: gossip

4 Knights: serious matters 3 Knights: lively debate 2 Knights: intimacy Majority Knights: action, college

4 Pages: dangerous illness 3 Pages: dispute 2 Pages: disquiet Majority Pages: important new beginnings, news, working with kids

4 Tens: condemnation 3 Tens: new condition 2 Tens: change Majority Tens: endings and new beginnings

4 Nines: a good friend 3 Nines: success 2 Nines: receiving something Majority Nines: closure, endings

4 Eights: reverse 3 Eights: marriage 2 Eights: new knowledge Majority Eights: achievement

4 Sevens: intrigue 3 Sevens: physical/mental weakness 2 Sevens: news Majority Sevens: struggle, challenge

4 Sixes: abundance 3 Sixes: success 2 Sixes: irritability Majority Sixes: harmony, give and take

4 Fives: regularity 3 Fives: determination 2 Fives: vigils Majority Fives: chaos, change, difficulty

4 Fours: journey soon 3 Fours: subject of reflection 2 Fours: insomnia Majority Fours: stability

4 Threes: progress 3 Threes: unity 2 Threes: calm Majority Threes: giving birth, celebration, fun

4 Twos: contention 3 Twos: security 2 Twos: accord Majority Twos: important decisions, but you should take your time

4 Aces: favorable chance 3 Aces: small success 2 Aces: trickery Majority Aces: fresh start

REVERSE

4 Kings: swift movement 3 Kings: commerce 2 Kings: projects Majority Kings: career, work

4 Queens: bad company 3 Queens: gluttony 2 Queens: work Majority Queens: evil influences

4 Knights: alliance 3 Knights: duel/encounter 2 Knights: susceptibility Majority Knights: changes in relationships

4 Pages: absence of attribute 3 Pages: idleness 2 Pages: societal expectations Majority Pages: constriction

4 Tens: an event 3 Tens: disappointment 2 Tens: expectations justified Majority Tens: activity

4 Nines: extortionate moneylending 3 Nines: imprudence 2 Nines: small profit Majority Nines: bad money decisions

4 Eights: making errors 3 Eights: spectacle/absurdity 2 Eights: misfortune Majority Eights: failure

4 Sevens: quarrelling 3 Sevens: joy 2 Sevens: irreputable people (specifically woman) Majority Sevens: untrustworthy people

4 Sixes: care 3 Sixes: satisfaction 2 Sixes: downfall Majority Sixes: happiness

4 Fives: everything in order 3 Fives: hesitation 2 Fives: reverse Majority Fives: stagnation, but more in a positive sense

4 Fours: travelling abroad 3 Fours: disquiet 2 Fours: dispute Majority Fours: movement

4 Threes: great success 3 Threes: serenity 2 Threes: safety Majority Threes: peace

4 Twos: reconciliation 3 Twos: apprehension 2 Twos: mistrust Majority Twos: stagnation

4 Aces: dishonor 3 Aces: debauchery 2 Aces: enemies Majority Aces: mistrust in people around you

[lilborealis]

Incorrect Quotes pt 2:electric boogaloo

(Contains some oc’s, oc x canon and some spoilers for COD MW3!)

Price:we have to get to a hospital and we have to get there fast.

Ghost:then I should drive.

Gaz:why you?

Ghost:I have nothing to live for, and I drive like it.

Price:okay, let’s do it.

*cuts to*

Everyone in the car, but Ghost:*screaming*

Tsukishima:nothing in life is free.

Yamaguchi:love is free!

Daichi:adventure is free.

Sayuri Fujimoto (2nd year libero from the Nekoma girls team):knowledge is free.

Rumiko Kojima (3rd year middle blocker from the Nekoma girls team):everything is free if you take without paying.

Asahi:RUMI NO-

Teen! Geto:ah shoot, the door’s locked.

*teen Gojo throws a chair through the window*

Teen! Geto:perfect

“Before I do anything, I ask myself, would Jacob do that thing? And if the answer is yes, I do not do that thing”-Evie Frye, at some point

Jacob:am I cool or what?!

Emily Denning (ac syndicate oc):what.

Jacob:I said, and I cool or-

Emily:yeah, I heard you.

*Price telling soap not to shoot Markarov*

Price:I just don’t think shooting Markarov would do anyone Justice. He deserves to rot behind bars

*Price after Soap gets murdered by Markarov*

Price:kill the rat

Kuroo:is this Whiskey or perfume?

*Bokuto takes it and chugs the entire thing*

Bokuto:it’s perfume

Hana Kuroo (2nd year wingspiker for the Nekoma girls team):BO WHAT THE FU-

Asahi:wait, are you flirting with me?

Rumiko Kojima (3rd year middle blocker from the Nekoma girls team):have been for the last year, thanks for noticing.

Gojo:if you keep talking, I’m jumping out of the window.

Nanami:we….we are on the first floor.

Gojo:yeah, but I still want a dramatic exit.

Graves:you can trust me, let’s not forget, who helped you against Markarov!

Corvo (COD Oc):let’s not forget who tried to kill us (141+Los Vaqueros) in Mexico.

Iron Spider(spiderverse Oc):snow got me feeling some type of way 🥰

Miguel:that’s hypothermia.

Iron Spider:

Miguel:

Iron Spider:*sarcastically*damn, the paramedics told me it was the magic of Christmas

Emily Denning (ac syndicate oc):dearest.

Jacob:yes love?

Emily:you’re an asshole.

Jacob:Aw thank you love, I love you too

Sayuri Fujimoto (2nd year libero from the Nekoma girls team):is something burning?

Nishinoya:only my love for you.

Sayuri:…..Yu the toaster is on fire.

Osamu:what am I allergic to?

Atsumu:Pine nuts.

Zia Kurushigera (2nd year manager of the Inarizaki boys volleyball team):and the full spectrum of human emotion.

Atsumu, fighting for his life:I-I JUST NEED YOU TO STAY CALM!

Zia Kurushigera (2nd year manager of the Inarizaki boys volleyball team), very angry:I’m just gonna stay angry, I find that relaxes me.

Georgette Chevrolet (ac unity oc):I’m not doing well.

Lionel Poussin(ac Unity oc):oh? What’s the matter?

Georgette:I have this headache that comes and goes.

*Arno enters the room*

Georgette:there it is again.

Kuroo:music is just wiggling air.

Hana Kuroo(Haikyuu oc):*covering her ears* Tetsu, please don’t.

Lev:and color is just wiggling light.

Fukunaga:artists and musicians are just magicians of the wiggle.

Yaku:Fukunaga-PLEASE DON’T

Kenma:wiggle

Gojo:what are you doing here?

Megumi:running away from my problems….

Gojo:come on in!

Malik:I need a vacation.

Some random novice:but all you did was talk to Altair…..

Malik:EXACTLY.

Spider-Punk:I’m a reverse necromancer.

Spider-Gwen:isn’t that just killing people?

Spider-Punk:Ah, a technicality.

Nobara:FIGHT ME YOU NERD ASS PUNK!

Megumi:at least try to sound slightly sophisticated when you threaten someone?

Itadori:dost thou wish to engage in a duel, my GOOD BITCH?!

Megumi:somehow that is so much worse.

[fehtism]

Hi! Could I ask about Spring & Winter Bruno builds please? :)

I already have them built but I am no expert and feel there could probably be improvement 🤔

hi ! thank you for your ask

starting off with winter bruno he wants to be a far save armor which is a highly competitive role. i don't recommend taking him into aether raids but he's very usable in arena.

armored floe provides a res based damage increase and the crucial unpiercable damage reduction.

kestrel stance 3 provides the -1 special cd per attack on enemy per hit effect. if you have guard support you can also run atk/spd unity which turns stat debuffs into buffs.

savvy fighter 4 provides the full null follow up effect assuming he wins a speed check (i believe it's if his speed is greater than foes speed -10) and also provides damage reduction. he does not want to run any other fighter skill because the effects of something like special fighter already exist on arcane caliburnus.

you can inherit savvy fighter 4 and kestrel stance 3 from fallen anakos at the same time by getting savvy fighter 3 from the valentines lucina combat manual in the divine codes 4.

atk/spd far save helps him further speed stack while he far saves. atk/spd far save and armored floe can be inherited at the same time from brave corrin.

the squad ace BS seal (acquired from doing squad assaults) grants a visible +3 atk/spd but also +5 hp which increases his bulk. he isn't tied to this deal though and can run atk/spd form or mystic boost 3.

this build only requires two units to be foddered (and a combat manual) making it very efficient.

as for spring bruno ...

i had a Hard time finding something for him to do. he has an extremely awkward stat spread with a very high defense stat and nothing to do with it. as a staff unit it's not like he can deal damage with bonfire and with dazzling staff 3 in base kit it's not like he's taking hits very often.

this build is a more supportive role and tries to get him to speed stack since there isn't any point in stacking other stats.

first is seaside parasol+ which is available on summer l'arachel who is currently running on the 7th anniversary special focus 1 banner. this is the best inheritable staff as there isn't any sort of arcane staff and should be refined with the wrathful staff effect. it inflicts the guard status on nearest enemies within 5 spaces, grants atk/spd +5 in combat, and debuffs foe's res in combat based on four times the amount of visible debuffs on the foe.

return+ is the preferred staff assist due to its ability to act like reposition which is generally the most versatile movement assist. you can also use ascended elincia's rescue+ instead since this build requires you to fodder an ascended elincia anyways.

return+ can be inherited from a sara combat manual from divine codes 3

lights restraint is arguably the best offensive staff special and it provides more guard support by inflicting the guard status on foe and foes within 2 spaces after combat. it's also only 2 cd.

C duel cavalry allows spring bruno to score /okay/ in arena. not great by any means but if you want to use ur faves in arena... even if you're not using him in arena +5 hp and +2 to all stats is still pretty nice. unfortunately C duel cavalry is only available on groom saul who is not in the standard pool of units. another option for an a slot skill since groom saul is limited is atk/spd catch 4 which is inheritable from quite a few units in the divine codes

the cheapest way to get atk/spd catch 4 from the divine codes is the summer dimitri combat manual from divine codes 4

dazzling shift would be better as dazzling far trace however that is only available on halloween flayn and almost feels like a waste... dazzling shift can be inherited from ascended elincia at the same time as lights restraint and the pre requisite fodder is already in his kit. it is simply a tier 4 version of dazzling staff in tier 4 skills are required to score in arena.

inf. speed tactic allowed spring bruno to be even more supportive to his allies beyond inflicting guard. inf. speed tactic provides both spd+6 and full null follow up to infantry allies (assuming the amount of infantry allies on the team is 2 or less). other options for c slot skills include any joint drive skill (preferably joint drive speed)

inf. speed tactic can be inherited from the brave chrom combat manual in divine codes 4.

the blade session seal is simply the only way he can hope to acquire enough speed to double enemies.

hope this helps !

[libertineangel]

The thing about Assassin's Creed is that it's always been deeply fucking stupid but at least in the early days it did it with an earnestness that wasn't blatantly trying so damn hard

Like AC2, commonly regarded one of the high points of the series (which is now at eleven mainline games), culminates with the Pope using the Papal Ferula as a magic staff (which is actually an ancient high-tech mind control weapon) in a duel in the Sistine Chapel before running off to the secret vault underneath the altar where you go for a second round boxing match, this is absolutely fucking ridiculous by any measure whatsoever but it's presented so straight-faced and down-to-earth that you just kinda go with it like hammy classic sci-fi

But then they start getting desperate in AC Syndicate ('cause they rushed Unity and it came out the door broken so they made fanservice schlock to try and regain some goodwill), where you meet Alexander Graham Bell and he makes you some fucking Batman gadgets to help out your friend the liberal democrat Karl Marx and then get knighted by Queen Victoria, and like sure nothing's individually any more ridiculous than the previous games but there's just too much of it, like this is a game where half the main plot is about searching for the Turin Shroud which is really an ancient high-tech medical device and that's standard acceptable fare for this series but that sort of nonsense has to come with setup, nobody would buy the extremely silly AC2 finale if it didn't have a whole serious storyline leading up to it, the historical nonsense needs a decent foundation or it just reads like the self-insert fanfiction of a teenage history nerd

Then with the RPG trilogy we end up with the desperation of ever-increasing stakes to try and stay big & dramatic (which a stealth game series should never be in the first place) so we go from a glut of historic cameos to actual fucking gods and mythical creature which stretch the realm of plausibility even in this utterly batshit series, I just wish the devs would calm the fuck down

[bbsketches]

Raise your hand if you think the Athos duel shirt is  a gift to humanity

[fellwar-finch]

Awhile back I asked the question “what would kalin Kessler use in commander” because I’m in love with the character but the way infernities play in yugioh is representative of my issues with the modern game: 15 minute turns that lock the opponent out of playing. So now that I’m trying to drop yugioh as a game as a whole I present: what commander decks would Yugioh 5ds characters use!

Starting with kalin/kiryu

Because he’s the first one I came up with! For awhile I thought he’d use Kroxa, titan of death’s hunger.

A discard theme on an elder giant that can resurrect from the graveyard? Yes please. But then I considered. What is kiryu kyosuke without the handless combo? It’s represented his single-minded devotion to revenge, his trashing of his previous ideals, his reliance on nothing but fate as he waits for the duel he lived by to kill him, and later his acceptance of the situation he’s in and the life he’s lived. (He uses the same ‘gamble the duel on chance’ strategies in his final duel with yusei and lotton as mindgames, uses the deck he once wanted to die by to live instead. The way he uses words in that duel reminds me a lot of the politics inherent in edh) The handless combo has always represented losing possibilities and options for certainty. Throwing away the future, letting go of the past, living in the present. And there’s no commander that represents that as well as Malfegor.

I still believe kroxa should be in the 99, but this is kiryu’s commander. The handless combo at home in this new game.

Next is the next one I’m certain about.

Aki/Akiza would play Ulasht the Hate Seed.

Not only is ulasht fitting with her plant theme, but dealing damage to the board by tearing yourself apart is what her ace, the black rose dragon, is meant to do. The ‘destruction as a coping mechanism, at the cost of yourself’ fits with ulasht, but so does the support group she gains throughout the series. Ulasht grows stronger and more versatile as you control more and more creatures, a mirror to the player in question.

There isn’t a one-to-one comparison to black rose’s ability to switch monsters from defense to attack because battle positions don’t exist in magic, but I suppose the ability to transition between going tall with ulasht and going wide with saprolings could fit there. Maybe. Honestly this one is mostly aesthetic.

Yusei Fudo:

Okay this one was hard. Yusei’s deck is a weird mishmash of weak monsters that can work together to synchro summon higher level ones, it’s fundamentally difficult to find a parallel without synchro summoning. I considered tokens or allies, but neither feel quite right. So I went back to the drawing board. What colours would yusei use.

Yes. All of them. He’d just play what he can find. There are no useless cards. Perhaps najeela? No, too aggressive. Perhaps slivers? Nope, too cohesive. Perhaps the reaper king? Aesthetic is close but he wouldn’t play a tribal deck, his only scarecrow is the scrap iron one. And then I found it.

Party. A way to make weak cards with no synergy work together. And then the similarities started pouring in. “Beacon of unity”, yusei United the satellite and the city, his like,,, whole shtick is unity. Party mechanic. If you have four creatures of specific types you get a benefit, the four signers (but there are five signers, I hear you say. Yes. There are. But the fifth was a secret for the majority of season 1 and ended up as the final antagonist, so there were only ever four signers on the same team… for awhile). Could also mean assembling the other four signers together, as he did. Mono white with an activated ability of each other colour. Yusei’s fundamentally moderate. He doesn’t want conflict, to the point he’s willing to ally with cops who once tried to kill him to face off against a new threat. I feel his natural colour identity falls somewhere in naya, but definitely very white-aligned.

And finally, the master of faster, who rules the duels, the king of turbo dueling himself. Jack Atlas.

…was really difficult.

He’s mono red or red/black, that much is obvious. He destroys stuff on board, easy. He uses dragons, of course. The card that fits most with him is balefire dragon. Done and done

…But balefire dragon isn’t legendary. Boardwipes on legs then. Massacre girl, no. Malfegor, no. Rakdos the showstopper? No.

Dragons, then! Kolaghan, not destructive enough. Blackwing? Focused on resurrection, that’s a no. Lathliss? He doesn’t play a lot of dragons, just a big voltron one.

I feel like there are three options for Jack atlas in commander. One: rule zero so balefire can be your commander. Two: a hidden commander balefire deck with Zirilan or Bladewing at the helm. Three: Inferno of the Star Mounts.

I feel none of these really capture the feel of Jack atlas perfectly, but each have their merits.

Jack’s a tournament player, I don’t feel he’d use any house rules, but also his whole ideal is ‘do things that nobody else does’ there was no king before him, he made that title his. He dueled the devil and trapped him in a trading card to wield his power. He could make the tournament scene bend to his will and embrace balefire as a commander. And if they didn’t? Well, zirilin can just fetch it from deck and he could play a bunch of protection for it, bladewing has access to tutors and grave recursion in black. Either could work as a hidden commander deck for balefire. And Inferno hits hard and fits the voltron strategy, but doesn’t have the sheer destructive power of balefire dragon.

If any of y’all have any ideas on what Jack atlas or any other character in 5ds might play, feel free to add em on!

[grailfinders]

Fate and Phantasms #90: Nero Claudius (Bride)

I don’t normally redo builds unless I really mess things up (sorry again Liz) because there’s still like 200 servants and counting left to go, but Nero was really insistent that she get another build. This time we’re doing Nero Bride, who’s like Nero, but in a bridal gown.

If you don’t want to read through the whole spiel to find out what’s different, I’ll break it down right now: 

There’s fewer charming spells since you’ve found the person you want to spend your life with, but in exchange you get more healing and buff spells to help them out.

We also take a quick dip into Cleric for even more party helping magic and features, but you’ll still be able to get ninth level spells if you want to make the Golden Theater.

Check out Nero’s build breakdown below the cut, or her character sheet over here!

Next up: Root (Honorific)

Race and Background

We’ve already covered Nero, but for the sake of not making you go back to a different build we’ll repeat ourself. You’re a Human Noble, giving you History and Persuasion proficiency. Since this is a variant of the normal Nero we’ll also make you a Variant Human, getting +1 Charisma and Wisdom along with Religion proficiency. You can’t always count on someone being their to officiate your wedding, so you have to be able to do it yourself. You also pick up the Lucky feat, which lets you roll an extra d20 to an attack, ability check, or saving throw and use either roll. You can also use this when an enemy attacks you as well, but all uses are limited to three times per long rest. Honestly it’s kind of weird regular Nero didn’t have this, but there’s no sight like hindsight.

Ability Scores

Your highest score should be Charisma like always; you’re the darling rose of Rome, and you also have mild reality-warping abilities based on how you think the world works. Second highest is Dexterity- you need to be able to pull off fancy swordplay and survive fights in a dress. Third is Wisdom- a good marriage is based in honesty, trust, and open communication, and that’s all wisdom. Also we need it for multiclassing. After that is Constitution, because we’re not dumping that. Your Intelligence isn’t super high, you’re still Nero, but we’re dumping Strength. Lifting weights is for other people.

Class Levels

1. Bard 1: Starting off as a bard nets you proficiency in Dexterity and Charisma saves, as well as three skills of your choice. Grab Performance and Acrobatics for your stage presence, and Animal Handling for your riding skill. You also gain Bardic Inspiration, a number of d6 per long rest equal to your charisma modifier that you can hand out as a bonus action to nearby creatures. They can then add this die to one attack, save, or check that they make within the next 10 minutes.

You also get to cast Spells using your Charisma as a casting ability. Pick up Friends, Animal Friendship, and Charm Person for your prerequisite charm spells, Cure Wounds to heal yourself or your significant other, Prestidigitation for minor magical effects, and Unseen Servant so you don’t have to lug your own bags around.

2. Bard 2: Second level bards are a Jack of All Trades; even if you’re not good at something, you think you are, and that’s enough reason to add half your proficiency to checks that don’t already use it. You also learn a Song of Rest, adding 1d6 to healing done on short rests. That’s a little less in character, but it’s free healing, don’t knock it. Also thanks to Tasha’s you get Magical Inspiration, allowing your inspiration to go just a bit further. Creatures can now use your inspiration die on healing spells or damage dealing spells, adding that roll to one affected creature.

Also, you’re so inspiring you evoke Heroism in one creature, making them immune to being frightened and giving them temporary hp each turn for up to a minute.

3. Bard 3: Third level bards pick a college, and of course you’re a bard of whis- just kidding, you’re still a Swords bard. This nets you the Dueling fighting style, as well as the ability to wield a scimitar. You also get Blade Flourishes, allowing you to spend bardic inspiration dice to deal extra damage an gain extra effects. A Defensive Flourish adds the roll to your AC until your next turn. A Slashing Flourish deals the extra damage to another nearby creature as well, and the Mobile Flourish pushes the creature away, and you can react to follow them. Everything you do is beauty, and now you can literally weaponize that beauty too.

As a bard you also get your first round of Expertise, which doubles your proficiency in two skills. Pick Performance and Acrobatics to perfect your public presence. 

To go even further, you learn how to Enhance Ability, giving yourself or a special someone proficiency in one kind of ability checks for up to an hour. Also, if you choose Constitution checks they gain 2d6 temporary hp, Strength checks double their carrying capacity, and Cat’s Grace prevents falling damage from less than 20′.

4. Bard 4: Use your first Ability Score Improvement to bump up your Dexterity, increasing your sword skills and armor class. You also pick up the spells Mending and Lesser Restoration to help patch up the party, as well as your fancy outfit.

5. Bard 5: Our last level of bard before we dip enhances your Bardic Inspiration to d8s, and you become a Font of Inspiration, letting you regain inspiration on short rests instead of long ones. 

This is also the first level you can use third level spells, and Intellect Fortress is a pretty smart pick. It gives you or a loved one resistance to psychic damage, plus advantage on intelligence, wisdom, and charisma saves. 

6. Cleric 1: If we want a marriage, you might have to do it yourself. There’s no class that can do that better than a cleric. First level clerics can cast and prepare Spells with Wisdom. You also pick a divine domain; since the Unity domain has been deprecated, you’re now a Peace cleric. At first level you become an Implement of Peace, giving you proficiency in Insight, because it’s the only option you don’t already have.

You can also make an Emboldening Bond between a number of creatures equal to your proficiency bonus that are within 30′ of each other as an action. For up to 10 minutes afterwards, those creatures can add 1d4 to an attack roll, ability check, or saving throw once per turn if there’s at least one other bonded creature within 30′ of it. You can use this a number of times per long rest equal to your proficiency bonus. I guess Nero is just more progressive about polyamory than Artemis is, at least until I finish the updates.

For your spells, pick up Guidance and Resistance to add a d4 to a creature’s next check or save, respectively. Thaumaturgy has a lot of uses, but it also makes you three times louder. Not better, just louder. 

You get another Heroism and Sanctuary for free, but I’d also check out Bless for bonuses on attack rolls and saving throws, Ceremony for the wedding abilities, and Command for another charming spell. I said we’d get less, not none.

7. Cleric 2: Second level clerics can Channel Divinity once per short rest in one of two ways. Turn Undead forces undead near you to make a wisdom save (8 + your wisdom modifier + proficiency) or be forced to run away from you until they can’t or they take damage. However, you can also make a Balm of Peace, using your action to move without provoking opportunity attacks, and moving within 5′ of another creature allows you to heal them for 2d6+ your wisdom modifier once per channel. You only have one healing skill so going on a spree like this is odd, but it’s not the worst way to break character.

8. Cleric 3: Third level clerics get second level spells. Aid lets you add extra HP to some creatures’ maximums, and Warding Bond lets you take half the damage for a creature for up to an hour. Sometimes love requires sacrifice. 

For spells outside your domain, Spiritual Weapon gives you a cool glowing sword you can swing around without getting into danger, and Calm Emotions makes you a soothing source of relief, either ending a charming or frightening effect on a creature or making a hostile creature indifferent towards you for up to the duration. Love makes us all better people. Or generally less murderous people, at least.

9. Bard 6: Back in bard now, you get Countercharm, letting you spend an action to give advantage to a creature that’s being charmed or frightened. Why you wouldn’t just use calm emotions, I don’t know. Regardless, you also get an Extra Attack, letting you attack twice with the attack action.

Your sword might not be magical yet, but it can look magical thanks to Daylight. This spell creates a 60′ sphere of light that can be applied to an object you’re holding, like a sword, and it also destroys darkness made by spells of third level or lower.

10. Bard 7: Seventh level bards get fourth level spells, like Charm Monster. Sometimes you bring Manticores back to the house like they’re lost puppies, that’s just an adorable quirk of yours.

11. Bard 8: Use your next ASI to enhance your Charisma for more inspiration and stronger spells. You also pick up the spell Locate Creature. Look, putting a tracking device in your loved one isn’t creepy, it’s common sense. Don’t judge her.

12. Bard 9: Your Song of Rest improves to use d8 as well, and you can use fifth level spells like Greater Restoration, which can end effects like charms, petrification, curses, ability score reductions, and hp reductions. 

13. Bard 10: The tenth level of bard increases your Bardic Inspiration to d10s, and you gain Expertise in two more skills. By this point you’re almost definitely married, so boost your Insight and Persuasion to make sure it’s a happy marriage.

You also learn Magical Secrets for the first time, two spells from any spell list. Pick up Haste to double a creature’s speed, add 2 to its AC, give it advantage on dexterity saves, and give it another action on each of its turns. After the spell ends it can’t move or take actions for a turn, but that’s a small price to pay. You also pick up Holy Weapon to turn your sword into an appropriately shiny magic weapon. For up to an hour, your weapon emits bright light, and deals extra radiant damage. You can also spend a bonus action to end the spell early and detonate the weapon, dealing even more radiant damage to creatures of your choice and possibly blinding them if they fail a constitution save.

Also grab Message. Communication is the heart of a good relationship, and now you can do it at long range.

14. Bard 11: Eleventh level bards get sixth level spells. Heroes’ Feast will help you cater your wedding without breaking the bank.

15. Bard 12: Use this ASI for more dexterity for higher damage and AC.

16. Bard 13: Thirteenth level bards see their Song of Rest grow to a d10, and they can use seventh level spells. Mirage Arcane lets you alter the terrain in a 1 mile square, and add structures where none are present, like, say, a golden theater. The illusion includes tactile elements, so it’s hardly even an illusion at this point. The big requirement is that you can’t radically change the terrain’s shape, so no flattening out part of a mountain to lay your theater on.

17. Bard 14: Fourteenth level swords bards can use a Master’s Flourish, replacing their inspiration die with a d6 to save on uses. There’s now no drawback to flourishes, so use them as much as you’d like!

You also get another round of Magical Secrets. Since this version of Nero could only exist in a dream, the Dream spell is a logical fit, letting you enter another creature’s dreams to either send them a message or give them a nightmare, dealing psychic damage and ruining their sleep. You also get Steel Wind Strike, to let you dramatically teleport around the battleground before everything explodes into blood behind you.

18. Bard 15: At fifteenth level your Bardic Inspiration maxes out at d12, and you learn eighth level spells. Glibness makes you even more charming than you already are, making your minimum roll for a charisma check always 15, and it’s impossible to magically telling if you’re lying. You know that whole thing about openness and honesty I said earlier? Maybe that’s not true. The real secret to marital bliss is lying well.

19. Bard 16: Use your final ASI to maximize your Charisma for the strongest spells and the most Inspiration you could possibly hand out.

20. Bard 17: Our capstone level gives you another boost to your Song of Rest; now it also uses a d12. You also get a ninth level spell- Foresight. This gives you or a willing creature advantage on all attacks, checks, and saving throws, immunity to being surprised, and attacking creatures have disadvantage for the duration, 8 hours with no concentration. 

Pros

You have a flair for the dramatic, and if your DM allows for creativity, you’ll be doing very well at the table. Be the star you were always born to be!

You’re very charming. With a maxed out charisma, Glibness, and plenty of spells to help out when your natural skill fails you, you’ll get your way most of the time.

You’re also very supportive of the rest of the party. With healing along with buffs like enhance ability, haste, foresight, and bless, your backup will be almost as amazing as you are.

Cons

Most buffs and charming spells require concentration, and with your constitution you probably won’t make your save that often without help. It also means you have to choose between effects, whether you should keep a creature under control or help the rest of the party with a buff can be a difficult decision.

Your Wisdom also isn’t amazing, which means your non-healing effects from Cleric aren’t that powerful compared to your bard features.

All your damaging spells are either impractical for fighting or tied to your melee attacks, so your range is looking a little short. For all its benefits, your Imperial Privilege won’t let you fly after those harpies.

[thatcrazycrowgirl]

I have an assassins creed thought:

What if Bellec succeeded in killing Arno during there fight and the rest of the game would be playing as Bellec? You as the player would direct the overthrow of the French assassin council then onward to kill the Templar’s of France

That would definitely have been an interesting direction to take the story! After all, it wouldn’t have been the first time an AC game switched protagonists halfway through (see AC3).

It likely would’ve also led to another one-on-one fight, this time, against Élise, and whether or not she would’ve been killed in that particular duel, also would’ve taken the game in an entirely different direction.

For instance, if she were to survive and escape, perhaps she would’ve ended up being the final boss, instead of Germain, with her and Bellec swapping comments about Arno as they fought each other - thus adding that emotional tension to the scene, while keeping Arno a relevant topic in the game. (It also probably would’ve kicked up Élise’s need for revenge, as she no longer would’ve just been seeking the man who killed her father, but also the one who killed her lover right in front of her.)

I also feel that, if Bellec were actually to kill Élise in that final confrontation, after taking out all of the other Templars, and the counsel members of the Assassin Brotherhood (as apparently planned), it would’ve left a bittersweet conclusion to the story - as despite supposedly ridding Paris of the Parisian Templars and getting his opportunity to “rebuild the Brotherhood”, Bellec likely would’ve grieved the loss of Arno, as it was very clear that Bellec wanted to rebuild the brotherhood with his protegee.

But this idea also brings up a few questions:

1. Would this conclusion of Bellec basically ending up alone to rebuild the Parisian Brotherhood, and Arno and Élise being reunited in death be a satisfying one for the player?

2. From a lore-based perspective, that also brings up the question of whether or not Bellec sired any children, because if not, how would we get access to his memories? Despite some attempts at getting around the genetic issue, it still remains the basis for most of the lore.

All in all, while I’m content with how Unity’s story went (a.k.a Arno NOT dying), this was definitely an interesting thing to think about! :D

[adorians-unite]

“Assassin’s Creed Unity” Fan Tour of Paris: Explore Paris as a Fan of AC Unity

This series of posts will cover locations around Paris and surrounding areas significant to “Assassin’s Creed Unity”. All locations covered in this series are accessible in the game. Descriptions of each location will cover both real-world historical and in-game contexts, and may contain story spoilers.

Access the Fan Guide: | PDF | Google Slides | Google Maps | Index |

Sainte-Chapelle SEQUENCE 02, MEMORY 02: “Rebirth”

HISTORY: 

Sainte-Chapelle is one of the most famous landmark churches in Paris. Located on Île de la Citê, the chapel was built by King Louis IX in the 13th Century to house his collection of holy relics, most notably Christ's Crown of Thorns. It has one of the most extensive 13th Century stained glass collections in the world.

IN AC UNITY: 

After Arno escapes his imprisonment in the Bastille, he is invited by the Master Assassin Pierre Bellec to join the Assassin's Brotherhood. But first he has to pass a test: Using only a clue given to him by Bellec in the shape of a medallion, Arno makes his way to Sainte-Chapelle, and uses the medallion to activate a secret entrance into the Parisian Brotherhood's hideout. From there, Arno is initiated into the Assassin Brotherhood.

Years later, after discovering that Pierre Bellec was behind the murder of the Assassin Mentor Mirabeau, Arno confronts Bellec at Sainte-Chapelle, and after a fierce duel between Arno and Bellec, it is here that Arno’s former friend and mentor meets his demise.

HELPFUL INFO:

Sainte-Chapelle Official Site

Sainte-Chapelle Opening Hours

Walkthrough: “Rebirth”

[jurakan]

Assassin’s Creed: Unity Review

Did I ever post my Unity review? No? Well here’s my Unity review.

The game is bad.

I think that Assassin’s Creed: Unity is quite frankly the most infuriating game I’ve played in years.

When I’d gotten a PS4 I decided I was going to get one of the AC games that was on PS4 that wasn’t Odyssey (because I already had obtained it and loved it). And I got Unity because I’d heard the free-running was better, and that when played well it was quite good. And while traversing Paris is fun, this game also sometimes plays as garbage and I’m kind of baffled about some of the decisions they’ve made designing it.

You see, this is my experience in playing just about every Assassin’s Creed game: try to be sneaky around the guards, but when that inevitably fails I kill them all. I was starting down this path in Unity when the game stopped me.

“Hang on a sec, you can’t do that,” the game said. “Why not?” I asked. “Because we’ve designed the combat to be utter garbage!” the game joyously exclaimed, laughing maniacally. And it wasn’t lying. The combat is utter garbage and I got killed pretty quickly. The parry is too clumsy for the careful timing it sometimes requires, you’re practically defenseless against guns, and counter kills have been removed. I get the point, of course: the game wants you to try more stealthy approaches, and so if you get detected you’ve got to retreat and rework your approach. But it was just completely at odds with how I played these games. I felt as if the previous games went out of their way to make you feel like a badass warrior and then Unity goes out of its way to make you feel as weak as possible. And for a game that makes you want to avoid combat like the plague, it keeps putting you in it. “But stealth!” the game and its fans reply. Which doesn’t work for me, because the Batman: Arkham games had amazing stealth sections that rely on not getting caught, but the combat isn’t utter crap. If there’s a part of the game you’re hoping people will avoid, maybe you should realize that it’s because that part of the game is terrible and need reworking, not that you’re clever for designing it so. “I actually really liked the combat,” says Unity fanboy #463 on Reddit. Alright, but you do know you are admitting to enjoying something deliberately designed to be unpleasant? It’s a bit like telling everyone you enjoy the smell in gas station restrooms. It isn’t something you should really brag about. Unity fanboy #149 scoffs haughtily. “Well I want my games to be challenging, unlike a casual gamer,” he says. Good for you. But that defense doesn’t work with this game because I’m not just being challenged by the game’s combat difficulty, which is aggravating by design, I’m being challenged by the fact that the game doesn’t work. What makes the stealth and combat so aggravating is how glitchy the game is. At one point in a story-scripted fight Arno wouldn’t attack, block, dodge or shoot, and the only actions he could perform were walking around and dropping smoke bombs. Sometimes Arno refuses to shoot when prompted, as if the targeted enemy was just too cool to die. Sometimes enemies aren’t hurt by being shot. Once Arno refused to start sneaking. I accidentally got into conflicts because I shot guards in the back of the head and instead of dying they turned around and saw me. Every so often, a civilian will walk in front of the barrel of your gun because he or she is suicidal I guess. I bumped into a guard on the other side of a wall. Guards spawned from nowhere to fight me and then when I hid they went back across the street on the other side of a wall. A guard with his back turned saw me on top of a rooftop. Sometimes when you’re detected you have to fight the one guy who saw you, and sometimes you have to fight all of his buddies who also apparently know where you are as they run from all over the block. And on some occasions the guards on the first floor won’t notice if you fire a gun on the second. At some points smoke bombs work to make your enemies lose track of you; at others they won’t. Frequently I’d aim to air assassinate a guard only for the game to switch which guard I was targeting as I’m pressing the button. In short, even if the stealth and combat were fun, the fact is that when you begin either you never know what exactly you’re signing up for because it doesn’t work. And not in a good way, like the game surprising you with extra fun; it’s exactly the wrong sort of way, where you think your mission is to defend an army officer against royalists and because you make too much noise fighting the royalists then the army soldiers decide to kill you too. [Also, you’re encouraged to use smoke bombs a lot. Which doesn’t really sound that stealthy, if you think about it, because a giant cloud of smoking spontaneously erupting around a group of guards is the exact opposite of stealthy.] I’m sure some fanboy will try to assure me it’s my fault that the game doesn’t play well, and that it’s actually pretty well designed. To that, I answer: Cherry Bombs. See, the game gives you this stealth tool called the ‘Cherry Bomb’ which is essentially a firecracker that acts as a noisemaker--you throw it somewhere, it’ll make sparks and noise, and the guards will be distracted and go investigate. This replaces the ‘whistle’ function the past two games had to draw guards over to where you are. What the game doesn’t tell you is that the Cherry Bomb has to be within a guard’s line of sight. Which means if you’re hiding  in a hallway and are trying to lure a guard from an adjacent room into the hallway, then the Cherry Bomb won’t work unless the guard can turn around and see it from his position. Otherwise, they may turn around in the direction of the noise, but won’t move towards it. It doesn’t matter if it’s right behind them, or right around the corner; if they can’t see the Cherry Bomb, it won’t work. Essentially, one of the key stealth tools you start out with is a noisemaker that only works if enemies can see it. A noisemaker that works by line of sight! No one can tell me that a competently-designed game would include that! What makes stealth and combat even more difficult is that the game has what it calls “Crowd Events,” which are things that happen in the streets of Paris that you can interfere with, like someone getting robbed, or mugged, or bullied, or whatever. But in crowded areas this happens every minute or so, and even if you don’t interfere in the Crowd Event then the surrounding guards might take notice of someone in the street getting run through, and then a fight will break out and your stealth will be ruined because if you go anywhere near it the guards will detect you and the game will act like it’s your fault for not being sneaky enough. During one stealth mission three or four Crowd Events occurred within seconds of each other, with two spawning at once. They’re optional yes, but call me a moron because I always try to help when someone’s getting gutted on the pavement, which often leads to me being gutted on the pavement. There are times when the game doesn’t tell you what to do in specific situations and then acts like you should have known it all along. In Assassin’s Creed III it gives you specific instructions on what to do in combat when someone points a gun at you. Unity gives you no such help. I didn’t learn until I looked up combat tips for the game that you’re supposed to hit the dodge button at just the right second. Sometimes the game doesn’t give you enough time to realize that someone is shooting at you. If Arno is not in combat mode and someone’s aiming at you, you’re just out of luck, as the dodge button isn’t an option there. There’s an eye that appears next to the minimap, I think to tell you that you’re in a guard’s line of sight, but the game never tells me, so that’s just a guess on my part. The boss fight with Bellec has him disappear with a smoke bomb, and then he will try to jump on you and stab you, which the game doesn’t give any hint as to what you’re supposed to do about and it sucks because if he hits you then you die in one hit. There are skills and abilities that you have to unlock that you really shouldn’t. Double assassination is an ability that takes much too long to unlock; wisely the following game made this unlockable in the tutorial section. Guns have to be unlocked with skill points, which is downright weird; no other game in the series gives that limit, except as being a point of story progression. That you have to spend skill points to use one of the game’s basic weapons is downright offensive. The most infuriating thing is the admittedly rare occasion when the game punishes you for being smart. When you go to assassinate Marie Levesque, for instance, it took me a couple of tries, but I managed to sneak into the palace and take out key guards, noting the escape routes as I went. Only when I actually performed the assassination, all the open windows had been closed and all the guards I took out had respawned. Essentially, I had carefully planned an escape route and the game slammed that door in my face, saying, “Nope! For all our talk of doing it your own way, you have to get out of this situation the way we say you do, okay?” What kind of game punishes you for doing your homework? What is that supposed to teach me?

Customization is cool, in theory, but it’s also a major hassle. Because I just wanted to look cool, but instead I’m constantly juggling a bunch of statistics on how to be stealthy but also carry enough ammunition and supplies. It’s not helpful that if you want to be stealthy, the way the game wants you to play, the outfit most suited to that is the stupidest-looking one of the bunch. I didn’t experience any of the horrifying glitches of people missing faces, the way a lot of people did at the game’s launch. However, NPC bystanders would often walk through cutscenes, including duels and chase scenes, leisurely waltzing right through running characters or in front of enemies as they’re getting shot. There were a couple of scenes where the camera is at an extremely odd angle of someone’s face, with the corner of someone else’s character model in the way. Traversal is far better than previous games; at least, in theory. Most of the time it works, but when it doesn’t, it does so in the most rage-inducing way possible. Often Arno will climb up when you tell him to climb down. It’s not uncommon for Arno to refuse to climb up for no reason at all. If you’re running and you happen to dash past something that would realistically bump him in the shoulder, Arno will start climbing up it and refuse to get down, hopping from table to barrel to chair, including chairs that there are already people sitting in. More than once I was perched on a ledge and then Arno would just fall, arms flailing as he descended into a horde of angry enemies. When sneaking sometimes he just refused to take cover where I tell him to, and will instead just sort of rock back and forth on his heels like a moron or stick to a surface further away from him than the one I told him to take cover behind. “Just wait ‘til you see what we did with Eagle Vision!” the game says, clapping like a madman. I am very tired at this point. “How did you screw up Eagle Vision, that one button that makes it easier to see enemies and detect important elements around you?” I ask. “It’s on a short timer!” Unity is cackling now as it practically explodes with malicious glee. “And it has a cooldown period!” Yes, that staple of the series, Eagle Vision, is now only meant to last a few seconds. Certain types of gear will enable it to last longer and give it more range (WHY WOULD CHANGING YOUR CLOTHES ENHANCE YOUR SIXTH SENSE?!?), but it’s still on a timer, so in order to know where everyone is, you have to keep switching it on. You can see enemies through walls though, which is new and actually good. Optional objectives are back, and aren’t quite as bad as they were in previous games; they don’t have ridiculous conditions in order to get full credit, usually just things like “Do two double assassinations” or “Stun three enemies.” They’re still not great, because again, any idea of freedom is limited in that you won’t get 100% on a mission unless you do it a certain way. The worse is always “Don’t get detected” because this is always followed by throwing you into large spaces filled with half a dozen guards and no cover. You’re better off ignoring them. Hey, did I mention that the game never shuts up? Notifications float up in your face on the right side of the screen, and there is no way to dismiss them; you must wait for them to go away. Black Flag had this too, but those were always small enough that they didn’t get in the way of gameplay, and you could check the past few messages in the pause menu. In this game they’re constantly popping up to tell you tips, location, and useless information, along with a quick sound that pings every time to make sure you stay pissed off. They’ll often pop up on top of each other, so if you’re working on one of the Murder Mysteries and you look at a clue, a notification will pop up on top of the clue information to tell you information you already know and you just have to wait for it to fade away. And when you break a lock in the lockpicking minigame, the popup will helpfully tell you that if you don’t want to break locks, press the button at the correct time. Or, in short, if you don’t want to mess up, then don’t mess up. Thanks, Unity. Speaking of lockpicking, who’s bright idea was it to make it so that of the treasure chests littered across the map, two-thirds of them are locked? I get that in theory it means that there are collectables that you can’t unlock until you’ve progressed, but what it means is that not only do you have to wait to a certain part of the game where you can buy that skill, you have to do an annoying little minigame every time you just want some treasure. It turns the task of collecting into even more of a chore. There are also collectables called “artifacts” which are coats of arms on the walls in random places. They’re not so bad, except in the Helix Rift sections, in which whether or not they show up in their place depends on the alignment of the stars or something. It makes it difficult to even care about trying to collect them all if the game sometimes refuses to let you do so. “So you hated this game?” you, the reader, asks me. That’s the thing though--I wanted very much to like it! There were parts I liked very much, in fact. When the game worked (and I must emphasize it wasn’t often), it was incredibly cool to feel like a stealth Assassin, taking out enemies and disappearing without a trace. This was utilized well in the missions that the game called Black Box missions. Basically, the developers realized that the assassination missions of the past games were too scripted, so they put in situations where you’re given a target and a location and you’re given much more freedom on how to take them out. The Murder Mysteries were, for the most part, excellent and allowed you to use your deduction skillz to put together the clues you’d been given and point out which person was the murderer. They were stressful, but not in a ‘wow-this-sux’ kind of way, more like the rewarding sort of way when you got it right. I liked them a lot. But they were frustrating when popups kept getting in the way of the clues. The Nostradamus Riddles were similarly excellent! They involved solving riddles by finding glyphs all over Paris, given clues that refer to the history of the places. The only criticism I had was that it would have been better if the in-game database had a search engine, sort of like the one in Carmen Sandiego: Treasure of Knowledge to make it easier to find what you’re looking for instead of scrolling through dozens of location entries. But yes, I think I hated it, at least a lot of the time I was playing it. I never thought I’d say that about an Assassin’s Creed game, but I cannot in good conscience tell someone that I liked this game or recommend it to anyone. It was not fun to play. The more time I spent with the game the less I liked it. Often enough I’d have fun, but that would soon be dashed by something stupid like being spotted by a guard through a building or Arno falling off a ledge. This should have been one of the greatest games in the series, and instead it’s undeniably the worst. Do not play this game, do not spend money on this game; every other game in the series is a more rewarding experience than Assassin’s Creed: Unity. Maybe some morbid curiosity is driving you to picking it up, but I urge you: do not listen! I had this whole section planned to talk about the story too! I had a thesis that Assassin’s Creed: Unity is trying to tell the story of France! I was going to talk about character models and history and all! But it doesn’t matter because nothing I say will change the simple fact that this game is not fun to play. Not even in a ‘If you like a challenge’ sort of way. This game is a broken mess that doesn’t work as intended. No. Don’t play it.