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starr-fall-knight-rise · 2 years

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A Million Lives

https://www.patreon.com/empyreaniris?fan_landing=true

https://starr-fall-knight-rise.tumblr.com/post/182501791735/master-post

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1jzEIdDAB4omdO2JcQVMObfrhLJ5kX4ONmSsLypM1ks0/edit?usp=sharing

Did he feel apprehension?

Well, no.

Honestly he was beginning to wonder if he had some sort of identifiable medical condition that repressed his ability to feel fear. Then again, that wasn’t exactly true, he had felt fear before at least twice that he could think of. Once when he had almost died in an ice storm on an alien planet, and another time when he had almost lost his throne and his life to an adrenaline addiction, a fact that he was still deeply embarrassed about to this day. Other than those instances, however, he couldn't think of any other examples.

Still the looks of pity being passed to him by his escort did not go unnoticed.

A billion years?

Would this really be so bad? Had he truly gotten himself into something he couldn’t handle.

He hoped not.

Maybe one of these days his bravado would come back to bite him in the ass. Maybe today was that day. The guards walked him briskly forward stepping sharply onto an elevator that had no buttons or dials. Symbols appeared in the air at the center of the elevator car along with a cool female voice.

“Seventh Ring.”

“You know, Ted Budy, Hitler, Mornix, and Geeanan are all on the seventh level too.”

“Mornix, huh.” Celex said as they began to move downward, “My great great great great great grandmother.”

“So psychopathy runs in the family I see.”

Celex shrugged, “I’m not a psychopath.”

The guards exchanged a look, “Really?”

He shook his head, “No, I care about those people back on the Empyrean, they’re my friends. I worry about them and I want them to succeed in battle.”

One of the guards snorted, “Or you see them as your property. Are you even capable of remorse, fear, sadness?” The question was accusatory, and the guard had clearly already made up his mind, so Celex don't stoop to answering the question. Didn’t stop him from thinking back to the incredible hurt he had felt when his primary wife betrayed him and set up her coup, the well of anger and sadness that had driven him, in a moment of rage, to destroy a planet just to get back at her.

No one should have that kind of paper, he was sure of that now.

And when that memory was gone he thought of the addiction and the fear that came with it.

Almost losing his life.

And finally, after his death, when he and Kelly had moldered together in darkness. He remembered the friendship they had established there held in each other’s arms to stave off the horror of the blackness.

Had he shed a tear when they escaped?

Maybe

Only he and Kelly would ever know the answer to that question.

The door dinged open, and they stepped out into the hallway, cool and grey and lined with prison doors. Didn’t look too intimidating, but it was really what was behind those doors that mattered.

The walk down the hall was a short one, turning towards the second or third door which opened with a soft hiss. The room inside was bright white, forcing him to raise his hands and squint. When they finally adjusted he found himself looking in on a small, sparse room, white padded walls, a small cot in one corner, a sink, but no mirror, and at the center of the room, a chair.

Looked sort of like those chairs you'd find in a human dentists office,, or an electric chair you would find in a prison.

And with that chair, stood a beautiful woman.

She was tall,

Muscular

Elegant.

And had a mane of technicolor hair, whose pattern he would have recognized anywhere, “Avix.” He snarled.

Ex Emperor Celex’s ex wife sneered in return, “You have no idea how much I am going to enjoy this.” Celex tried to dig in his heels, but the guards shoved him forward, unfortunately within Avix’s reach. She did not waste time, reaching out with one hand and grabbing him by the jaw, nails digging into either of his cheeks as she pulled him closer.

She squeezed hard, but he refused to make a sud glaring up at her with contempt.

“Don’t try to fight.” She said softly as the two guards retreated from the room, “WHile you are here, you are entirely within my power.” She made that fact clear a moment later with a little demonstration. A wave of ice washed through him, and before he truly understood what was happening, his body began to shrink arms receding, body morphing, until he dangled from her hand by his fur, feet dangling down and kicking helplessly as she held him.

She laughed as she watched him struggle, “I get now why the humans think we are so cute, tiny…. Helpless.”

He swung a foot at her, but that didn’t really do any good.

She let him struggle for a while, a lazy smile playing across her face, “As much as I am enjoying this moment the chair fits you better the other way. The cold ice receded from his body, and before he knew it he was back to his chosen form. She still held him by the hair, her fingers tangled through his roots, pulling at his scalp forcing him to bend over and twist.

She was enjoying this

Having him in her power.

“Now I ghetto make you pay, for what you did to me.”

Celex snarled, “What I did to you I don’t regret, traitor.” her hand gripped harder but he didn’t stomp, “How was the ninth ring? Cozy I hope.”

She twisted even harder, bringing him to one knee, “You will not speak to me like that, not here.”

“Don’t go playing the victim card. You and I both know you were a power hungry bitch.” He tried tilting his head up to look at her, “But we both know I like that in a woman.” She gritted her teeth at him, “Should have known you were going to stab me in the back, after everything we had been through together.”

She laughed, “Please you had other wives to amuse yourself with, I was nothing important to you.”

He snorted, “The infidelity card only works when your species is monogamous, and you and I both know you had your own “amusement as it were”. As for being important to me, you were. I thought we had something, a similar goal.”

“And that is where you were stupid. I didn’t want to be your companion, I wanted to be emperor.”

“Should have been better then.”

She snarled, shivering him forward and into the chair.

He tried to turn but before he knew it she was already strapping one of his hands into place,

“I am told, when the Makers designed the Celzex construct, it had the unique issue of causing something they referred to as rage bleed. In layman's terms it means that the celex construct was bad at containing the side of a soul that controlled rage. Construct biologists believe that’s why we were such a callous and warlike race, more so than the Drev or the humans.”

“There a point to this/” Celex grumbled.

“Yes,” She strapped his foot into place, before leaning forward over him. Her hands searched for the buckles over his chest, “It means, I am disappointed to see the true you, weak, unambitious.”

That stung, but he didn’t show her that.

“You’re just jealous I have people that actually like me.”

She laughed, “Your need for validation is amusing to me.”

She stepped behind him, slotting a small half circlet onto his head to rest against his temples, “This device is designed to channel memories and emotions into your brain.” She laughed, “I had to get the newest model in order to calibrate it to your request. The amount of information I will be forced to funnel into your mind is…. Well it definitely leans on the side of cruel and unusual, but you insisted, and I wouldn’t want to disappoint you.” She tapped the side of the device, “With this you will be able to feel and experience the lives of others as if they were your own simultaneously. At such a high rate of flow, this will probably tear your soul into little quivering pieces.” She grinned, “I look forward to watching the show.”

And then she pressed the button.

Celex could not have described in words what happened next, because no words could ever convey the sheer amount of pain and terror that followed. The fear of one, manageable, easy, but the fear of a couple billion stacked on top of each other all at once.

Incredible.

Unfathomable.

Terrible.

Over and over again, he felt the ground shake, the sky turn red. Violent death after violent death plagued him as the planet was ripped apart, billions trillions dying in a matter of seconds, but living just long enough to understand the apocalypse he had brought upon them. His very soul screamed, churned and attempted to escape as it was racked with a billion lives second after agonizing second. Celex had rarely experienced fear, but in that moment, he understood fear more deeply than any creature had ever truly understood because he felt it through the experiences of others.

And finally he realized.

He had never known fear, not in his life, not truly.

And when he thought it would be over, still it came in a torrent, racing through his mind and ripping him apart piece by piece. He couldn’t have screamed even if he wanted to scream, but he couldn’t find his mouth, and the screams of the dying weren’t enough to express the agony of fear and pain that followed.

The children’s fear was the worst, because it came with confusion, and the inability to understand what was happening. All he knew was that the end was coming.

How can one describe the feeling?

He was a glass, and the ocean had been poured into him all at once.

He was the singularity of a black hole, the center of a collapsing universe, an impossibly small point of mass with matter collapsing in around it.

He could not hold the memories, the cumulative experiences that in themselves added up to hundreds of thousands of years of experience, over and over and over again, his soul rubbed raw on sandpaper until there was nothing but a bloody smear left, infinite pain and suffering that seemed it would never end, go on to eternity until the very universe decayed away.

He could have been there for an eternity and he wouldn’t have known the difference.

He didn’t expect it to end.

But was surprised when it finally did.

All at once the pain was gone, and its sheer absence was a relief so incredible, it too could not have been described in words. Light filled his eyes, and for once he was not alone. The room above him was white, the walls around him white. He barely recognized the place, as a distant memory behind a wall of suffering and pain which was so poignant it was hard to see past.

Had he known this place.

He turned his head, looking up into the face of a woman who was barely familiar.

Her eyes were wide.

It was, hard to remember who she was, or where he was, but as the pain trickled slowly away he began to recognize things. She looked….scared, awed maybe, he couldn’t tell, but the pain was gone, evaporated, and behind it left a gaping chasm in his mind where he was unable to process what had occurred.

But still it was gone

Hot tears rolled down his face.

But with them came something else, a certain sense of urgency. He had to…. Help…. Someone?

He pulled at his bonds, “Let me go.:

The words felt foreign on his tongue, but the woman obliged, and it was to his surprise that he recognized her…. He had felt her. And then it came back to him, Avix, and with that realization followed other memoires, ones that were recent to his body if not his mind.

He was here to be punished

That was once his wife.

And there were others waiting for his help to save the universe.

He stumbled to his feet.

She stepped back.

He leaned heavily against the wall, feeling as if his very mind was bleeding, hemorrhaging like a civ, but then he began to laugh. She seemed quite unsettled, and as his laughter continued, two guards burst into the room, freezing in place and backing up as he straightened to his feet, familiarizing himself with the memories of the past few years, before the chasm in his head.

The tears did not stop, not even a little, but still the people who looked on him seemed unsettled

Terrified.

He knew now

He shouldn’t have come out of that being able to think, remembering who he was at all, But…. he did.

And he knew who he was, and he knew what he had done..

But now…. He had paid for it.

And that made him very dangerous.

He stumbled past the guards and out into the hall, leading himself away, past everyone who stepped back in shock and confusion, not daring to go near him. The more steps he took, the steadier he became slowly knitting the chasm in his head back together.

Remembering

Until he could almost pretend a thousand years had not gone through his head.

He stepped out into the docking bay watching the faces frozen in shock around him.

He was not supposed to have survived in tact.

Yet here he was, on his feet.

And ready to Kick apollyon’s ass.

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lilaconion · 1 year

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The Jedi of Pabu

Hunter x Jedi reader

ACT I

(Y/N) had only been 19 years old when the jedi purge started. She'd been newly knighted and was the chaperone for a gathering. It was forbidden for non-jedi, even clones, to come to Ilum. It was by will of the force that they'd been there and survived. She had also had Avix with her, the boy that later became her padawan. He was 14 and at the time the padawan of a dear friend of (Y/N)'s former master. (Y/N) and Avix's masters had shared a master, making them almost siblings. In a way, he was her cousin that she now had guardianship over.

At 20, she'd been living on Pabu for a year. Her 15 year old padawan had been extremely helpful in helping teach the 6 younglings that had managed to survive with them. She'd helped transport refugees to Pabu once during the war and hadn't expected that the invitationfrom them would be one of permanent residence with the younglings. She made herself useful, translating artifacts with full context and teaching in the limited school system that had been set up on the island.

She'd been away for 3 days after feeling something in the force. She felt a youngling that needed help, it was the same feeling she'd had right after the purge. It had caused the 5 younglings in her care to become 6. Now that became 7. She landed on Pabu, seeing the work being done on the lower level. As if it'd just happened to be the 3 days she was gone for that an incident occurred. Abandoning her ship and holding the 4 year old youngling on her hip, she sought out Shep. He acted like he was in high spirits but she could feel the guilt he held. "(Y/N), welcome home. Who's our new friend?" He had a way with children. He was like a father to all on the island and was always so eager to help out with the younglings. "This is Jalaa." She looked down at the togruta girl on her hip. "This is our friend, Shep." She looked almost scared until her new master gently directed her to focus on what she felt from the man. Only kind intentions ever came from Shep and the child soon felt that.

She used the reconstruction of lower Pabu as a teaching opportunity for her younglings. She sent her padawan on to help with jobs that needed a bit of jedi 'magic' and instructed the younglings in the force. She also felt the clones through the force. When Shep mentioned them to her in passing she was rather apprehensive. She had a couple of days of feeling them through the force before actually coming face to face with them. She didn't feel the evil in their heads that she'd felt in so many clones after the purge. She trusted that it was the force's way of telling her that they were safe. So she made her ability with the force obvious when first interacting with them. They looked a bit different but they were just like the clones she'd met during the war. Too proud to admit when they struggled. She saw two of them struggling to carry an old piece of a pillar. She lifted it out of their hold with the force and said, "Don't worry, I've got that." If they were going to shoot her, she had a weapon and wouldn't draw suspicion toward the younglings. "A jedi?" The one with an unfortunate hairline questioned. She placed the pillar piece into the pile that she was to later stack before responding. "If I say yes, promise not to shoot?" She joked. She knew that they wouldn't've hesitated if they were going to do it. This time, it was the one with long hair that spoke. "We, uh." He paused a little. "Had our chips removed." She didn't know what that meant but before she could ask one of the younglings ran up to her and tugged on her pant-leg. "(Y/N). Cain and Rena are fighting." She turned away from the clones to see one of the youngest of the younglings, the 6 year old she'd been led to through the force before arriving on Pabu. She crouched down to the child's level. "Well, that's not good. Thank you for telling me." She took the child's hand in hers as she stood and turned to the clones again. "See you around..."

"Hunter!"

"See you around, Hunter." She emphasised his name before turning and walking off with the child.

ACT II

Some days after the reconstruction of lower Pabu, Hunter wondered if the woman he'd met was real. He didn't dare ask the others about her, embarrassed about the fact a woman he didn't even know the name of was all he could think about.

While on an errand for Shep, he knocked on the door of something that looked the size of a town hall or another small community building of sorts, but looked like a home in every other sense. "There's a man here." The child that opened the door called through the house. He looked to be about Omega's age. "Pablo, more than one man lives on Pabu." The voice that called back was a woman's. She sounded tired. Somehow he knew that voice. Hunter wasn't sure why he knew the voice because most of the people he'd interacted with he'd done so whilst helping rebuild their homes. He hadn't been involved in fixing this building. The kid let him in and called back that he didn't know him. Hunter thought it was odd that he'd been let in but he followed the child to a soft seating area. He heard quick footsteps coming toward the room. "I'm so sorry, Rodger, since-"

She cut herself off when she entered the room. "If it was Rodger I would've left him outside." The kid walked out of the room, not before (Y/N) could sigh and try to remind him to have respect for others. As soon as Pablo left the room, a small smile came to her face. "I was wondering when I'd see you again, Hunter." She found herself enjoying the feeling of speaking his name. Her smile seemingly had a mind of its own as it tried to grow after her initial words.She managed to push it down but not without a couple of tugs at either side. "It's good to see you too." He said in that beautiful voice of his. His natural pout returned but this time with the hints of a smile before he continued. "Shep sent me to pick something up." He hadn't been a clone she'd met during the war but she still appreciated how well civilian ways and clothes suited the soldier. She made her eyes look behind Hunter as she blushed, realising that she'd been checking him out. She lied to herself and said that the blush was from remembering what she'd been asked to translate. What she'd been asked to translate was honestly exactly the thing she could imagine herself writing reminiscing on that moment. "Do you have any idea when he's free? There were a few issues with it." She tried her hardest to not obviously cringe or turn bright red. By a few issues, she meant one massive issue.

"He wants you to come for food tonight, so he'll be free then." She went to smile and reply but paused. She suddenly felt something in the force and a moment later heard a lightsaber ignite somewhere in the house. She reached out in the force with closed eyes and brought two fingers down as she turned it off. She heard a little shriek and the clank of a lightsaber on the ground before opening her hand and calling it to her. She'd done it too many times to remember by that point. She opened her eyes as the lightsaber came into her hand to see a confused clone. "I swear the longer we're away from the temple, the more they push it." She said with a little laugh and a shake of the head. As she stopped, her eyes focused on his and a sweet smile came to her face. His eyes were warm, despite how cold his natural stance was. He still stood like a soldier with his hands clasped behind his back. "Will I be seeing you later?" A barely noticeable pink rose under the skin of his cheeks and it brought her a strange joy. The joy grew with his smile at her. "I don't know, Master jedi. Will you?" He teased and the tone was like magic to her ears. He'd managed to make her smile like an absolute idiot. "My name is (Y/N)." She answered in mock annoyance, raising her eyebrows a little. "And I will." She said with snippy confidence. "Well, (Y/N), I'll see you later."

ACT III

Text

"(Y/N)!" Lyana acted as if she hadn't seen the jedi for months. In reality it had been a couple of days. Whenever (Y/N) pointed that fact out she'd be met with protests of how seeing her at home and at school were different. She was right, of course. When teaching, she had to be the sensible jedi master and be on alert to look after an entire generation of the island. When visiting she could do things like help retrieve lost items or generally help misbehaviour. "Miss. (Y/N)?" Omega questioned. She should've figured the new child on the island was related to the clones that suddenly showed up. "You don't have to say Miss when we're not in school." Lyana corrected her friend before turning back to the jedi. "Can I go on the roof?" This was normally something her father, Shep, wouldn't allow. Despite this, it happened every time (Y/N) came around, as long as Shep wasn't able to see. "Fine but be quick." The jedi chuckled as she used the force to lift the girl who let out a little excited squeel. Her padawan, Avix, did as he normally did and called out for Shep.

Shep came out as Lyana got onto the roof and his ability to father anything came out. "Are you two done?" He questioned (Y/N). She giggled and looked to the roof shrugging. She called up to Lyana to ask if she was done but got no response. She felt out into the force. There was a little thing the kid did and for some reason found it fun. She jumped off of the roof and (Y/N) caught her with the force. After the girl's feet touched the ground, she skipped over to Omega. "They're by the wrinkly rock. You have half an hour." The jedi then turned to her padawan. "Make sure the younglings don't try throwing the rock." He tried to protest but one stern mom 'don't backchat' look and he gave up and ran after the two girls.

(Y/N) turned back to Shep and hugged him. It was their usual greeting. "So, what do you need to talk about that you don't want Avix hearing?" He asked, patting her shoulder. She took a sharp breath in and pulled two books out of her robes. "It's about that translation." She said with a face that screamed how painfully awkward this was for her. Shep obviously missed every sign of this as he joyfully called for Phee and the clones. He assumed Tech would be interested and Phee always liked hearing breakdowns on things she'd managed to recover. She couldn't help the blush that took over her entire face as four people joined them and she realised she would have to explain it to all of them. Phee greeted her friend with a side hug and guided her to the table. "It can't be as bad as-"

The jedi interrupted, "It's worse than that." Phee had either been referring to a translation about a fertility god or that same pantheon's god of war. Both had somehow had tamer depictions of violence and sexual activity. "I thought it was a legend about a hero?" Phee questioned jokingly, not expecting the answer. "It is, from the perspective of a girl with a very active imagination." Shep sent over a questioning look as they sat. "The author had a rather impressive command of old alderaanian which she used to describe some creative ways she wanted to consummate a non-existent marriage." She eventually said, despite tripping over her words and awkwardly pausing to think about how to best word the next part. She really wanted to look over to Hunter but realised what it could imply after what she'd just said. She heard the big clone questioning what she meant and heard the one with bad hair explain that she'd meant sex. She was beyond glad when Phee asked her a question. "Alderaanian? I thought you said it would be in old coruscanti." She gave a look and a smile, knowing she was about to get her friend out of the awkward state she was stuck in. "Just happened to be in the 200 years they thought using alderaanian was a good idea. Despite most of it being filth, it's pretty poetic. Obvs, keeping with the time, but still impressive." She remembered the context and looked over to Shep and apologised. The translation had been from an old book his people held dear. They knew it was about a warrior from legend but as the old languages had been forgotten by most of their people, nobody knew it was essentially smut. "I cut out most of the worst bits but there's still some kinda suggestive stuff cause of the story in those bits." She handed the original text and the translation over to Shep with an apologetic smile.

"My data shows that there was another, more recent, period of 70 years where old alderaanian was used. It would make more sense for something so well preserved to be from then instead of the earlier period." The clone with the hairline as in the centre as the Bendu said. She turned her head away from Shep and toward the clone. She got a little glimpse of Hunter, who was sitting right next to his brother. It'd been a few hours since she'd last seen him and she'd already had her memory underestimate his perfection. Even if he was just a simple look of interest at the conversation, it was wonderful. She looked at the brother that'd spoken. "You don't know old alderaanian, do you?"

"My helmet is programmed to be able to translate old alderaanian and many more languages."

"Then that is a no. There is a difference between knowing the language and just seeing a translation. A translation won't show you the loss of two words for the colour red when they readopted the language because none of them had spoken it in generations. It won't show you the loss of poetic descriptions which have no true translation." With each word she became more passionate and her tone ended up being somewhere between condescending and angry. She hadn't noticed this though. Neither had the clone she was talking to.

As their conversation continued Hunter just watched. He hadn't been sure what Phee saw in Tech. He loved his brothers dearly and had become accustomed to their quirks, which was why he had been able to deal with Tech's infodumping. Ancient languages was something Hunter would've happily gone his whole life knowing nothing about, but seeing the way her face lit up when talking about it made him want to ask her a thousand questions. He'd already thought she was attractive. Seeing her be so good with children had helped with that quite a bit. Seeing her passion was the final thing that made him decide that he'd ask her out to dinner. Alone this time.

The children came back and Hunter noticed Omega and a mirialan girl running together and giggling. The padawan had a little togruta on his shoulders. Omega ran up to Hunter and introduced her new friend as Hetty before said new friend started making Omega's hair float and she ran off after her. (Y/N) thanked her padawan and took the little togruta off of him before sitting back at the table. The togruta sat on her lap and her padawan joined his master's side. Hunter watched as Phee inquired about the child. "This is Jalaa." She smiled down at the child and bounced her a little to keep her attention. "This is our friend Phee." She told the child. She then turned to her padawan. "You ought to introduce yourself." She knew that Avix was aware of why she wanted him to introduce himself. Having been the student of both her and a master that was heavily involved in her education, he knew it was just so she didn't have to ask the strangers for their names.

As the evening continued, both she and Hunter would glance at one another with as much subtly as they could. The looks and glimpses of one another hadn't gone unnoticed. As (Y/N) focused on connecting to Shep's flowers and Hunter watched Omega, Lyanna and Hetty play from a distance, the others slipped off. Tech wanted to tinker and Phee wanted to watch. Wrecker played with the younglings. Shep and Avix went off to look at some artefacts. So it was just (Y/N) and Hunter left.

"I can feel you watching me." She said with her hand against the plant's stem and her back to Hunter. She had her eyes closed but the force allowed her to see so much more than her (E/C) eyes normally could. "I was-" He tried to defend himself, whilst somewhat flustered by the fact he'd been caught. She'd had her back turned but he should've figured that a jedi, especially one that had so many children in her care would be able to feel his eyes. "I'm watching you too." She said simply. She felt his confusion, so she spoke again as she got up. "I can see and feel you in the force. It's... nice." She spoke the final admission as she turned to face him. He stood when she did and walked over to join her. She put her hands behind her back and fiddled with them as Hunter came a little closer than he should've. "So, you think I feel nice?" He teased as she smiled up at him a little.

"In the force. But your skin might feel terrible." She teased and challenged him with her eyes as a small smirk came to her lips.

"If it feels nice, would you let me take you out on a date?" Without answering, her hand went to his cheek. He quickly grabbed her hand without thinking but softened and released his hold when he looked back into her eyes. Her fingers brushed up his cheekbone and ghosted back down his jaw to his chin. He watched her eyes as she admired his face. She let her hand slip down so that her palm was flat against his chest. Her other hand took his arm and put it around her waist. As he began to hold her, she ran that hand up his arm. "I would've said yes even if you didn't have such nice skin."

"We're sisters now!" Hetty shouted to Omega. (Y/N) just let her head flop onto Hunter's chest and felt his laugh vibrate through it. She groaned a little which only made Hunter laugh more. “Ugh, shoot me.”

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