#Aha Parenting Blog

[qqueenofhades]

Hello! This is kind of a weird ask, I'm sorry to bother you, but seeing as you're a very intelligent studied historian that I deeply respect, I was hoping you could offer some advice? Or like, things i could read? Lately, i feel like my critical thinking skills are emaciated and its scaring the shit out of me. I feel very slow and like I'm constantly missing important info in relation to news/history/social activism stuff. Thats so vague, sorry, but like any tips on how i can do better?

Aha, thank you. There was recently a good critical-thinking infograph on my dash, so obviously I thought I remembered who reblogged it and checked their blog, it wasn't them, thought it was someone else, checked their blog, it also wasn't them, and now I can't find it to link to. Alas. But I will try to sum up its main points and add a few of my own. I'm glad you're taking the initiative to work on this for yourself, and I will add that while it can seem difficult and overwhelming to sort through the mass of information, especially often-false, deliberately misleading, or otherwise bad information, there are a few tips to help you make some headway, and it's a skill that like any other skill, gets easier with practice. So yes.

The first and most general rule of thumb I would advise is the same thing that IT/computer people tell you about scam emails. If something is written in a way that induces urgency, panic, the feeling that you need to do something RIGHT NOW, or other guilt-tripping or anxiety-inducing language, it is -- to say the least -- questionable. This goes double if it's from anonymous unsourced accounts on social media, is topically or thematically related to a major crisis, or anything else. The intent is to create a panic response in you that overrides your critical faculties, your desire to do some basic Googling or double-checking or independent verification of its claims, and makes you think that you have to SHARE IT WITH EVERYONE NOW or you are personally and morally a bad person. Unfortunately, the world is complicated, issues and responses are complicated, and anyone insisting that there is Only One Solution and it's conveniently the one they're peddling should not be trusted. We used to laugh at parents and grandparents for naively forwarding or responding to obviously scam emails, but now young people are doing the exact same thing by blasting people with completely sourceless social media tweets, clips, and other manipulative BS that is intended to appeal to an emotional gut rather than an intellectual response. When you panic or feel negative emotions (anger, fear, grief, etc) you're more likely to act on something or share questionable information without thinking.

Likewise, you do have basic Internet literacy tools at your disposal. You can just throw a few keywords into Google or Wikipedia and see what comes up. Is any major news organization reporting on this? Is it obviously verifiable as a fake (see the disaster pictures of sharks swimming on highways that get shared after every hurricane)? Can you right-click, perform a reverse image search, and see if this is, for example, a picture from an unrelated war ten years ago instead of an up-to-date image of the current conflict? Especially with the ongoing Israel/Palestine imbroglio, we have people sharing propaganda (particularly Hamas propaganda) BY THE BUCKETLOAD and masquerading it as legitimate news organizations (tip: Quds News Network is literally the Hamas channel). This includes other scuzzy dirtbag-left websites like Grayzone and The Intercept, which often have implicit or explicit links to Russian-funded disinformation campaigns and other demoralizing or disrupting fake news that is deliberately designed to turn young left-leaning Westerners against the Democrats and other liberal political parties, which enables the electoral victory of the fascist far-right and feeds Putin's geopolitical and military aims. Likewise, half of our problems would be solved if tankies weren't so eager to gulp down and propagate anything "anti-Western" and thus amplify the Russian disinformation machine in a way even the Russians themselves sometimes struggle to do, but yeah. That relates to both Russia/Ukraine and Israel/Palestine.

Basically: TikTok, Twitter/X, Tumblr itself, and other platforms are absolutely RIFE with misinformation, and this is due partly to ownership (the Chinese government and Elon Fucking Musk have literally no goddamn reason whatsoever to build an unbiased algorithm, and have been repeatedly proven to be boosting bullshit that supports their particular worldviews) and partly due to the way in which the young Western left has paralyzed itself into hypocritical moral absolutes and pseudo-revolutionary ideology (which is only against the West itself and doesn't think that the rest of the world has agency to act or think for itself outside the West's influence, They Are Very Smart and Anti-Colonialist!) A lot of "information" in left-leaning social media spaces is therefore tainted by this perspective and often relies on flat-out, brazen, easily disprovable lies (like the popular Twitter account insisting that Biden could literally just overturn the Supreme Court if he really wanted to). Not all misinformation is that easy to spot, but with a severe lack of political, historical, civic, or social education (since it's become so polarized and school districts generally steer away from it or teach the watered-down version for fear of being attacked by Moms for Liberty or similar), it is quickly and easily passed along by people wanting trite and simplistic solutions for complex problems or who think the extent of social justice is posting the Right Opinions on social media.

As I said above, everything in the world is complicated and has multiple factors, different influences, possible solutions, involved actors, and external and internal causes. For the most part, if you're encountering anything that insists there's only one shiningly righteous answer (which conveniently is the one All Good and Moral People support!) and the other side is utterly and even demonically in the wrong, that is something that immediately needs a closer look and healthy skepticism. How was this situation created? Who has an interest in either maintaining the status quo, discouraging any change, or insisting that there's only one way to engage with/think about this issue? Who is being harmed and who is being helped by this rhetoric, including and especially when you yourself are encouraged to immediately spread it without criticism or cross-checking? Does it rely on obvious lies, ideological misinformation, or something designed to make you feel the aforementioned negative emotions? Is it independently corroborated? Where is it sourced from? When you put the author's name into Google, what comes up?

Also, I think it's important to add that as a result, it's simply not possible to distill complicated information into a few bite-sized and easily digestible social media chunks. If something is difficult to understand, that means you probably need to spend more time reading about it and encountering diverse perspectives, and that is research and work that has to take place primarily not on social media. You can ask for help and resources (such as you're doing right now, which I think is great!), but you can't use it as your chief or only source of information. You can and should obviously be aware of the limitations and biases of traditional media, but often that has turned into the conspiracy-theory "they never report on what's REALLY GOING ON, the only information you can trust is random anonymous social media accounts managed by God knows who." Traditional media, for better or worse, does have certain evidentiary standards, photographing, sourcing, and verifying requirements, and other ways to confirm that what they're writing about actually has some correspondence with reality. Yes, you need to be skeptical, but you can also trust that some of the initial legwork of verification has been done for you, and you can then move to more nuanced review, such as wording, presentation of perspective, who they're interviewing, any journalistic assumptions, any organizational shortcomings, etc.

Once again: there is a shit-ton of stuff out there, it is hard to instinctively know or understand how to engage with it, and it's okay if you don't automatically "get" everything you read. That's where the principle of actually taking the time to be informed comes in, and why you have to firmly divorce yourself from the notion that being socially aware or informed means just instantly posting or sharing on social media about the crisis of the week, especially if you didn't know anything about it beforehand and are just relying on the Leftist Groupthink to tell you how you should be reacting. Because things are complicated and dangerous, they take more effort to unpick than just instantly sharing a meme or random Twitter video or whatever. If you do in fact want to talk about these things constructively, and not just because you feel like you're peer-pressured into doing so and performing the Correct Opinions, then you will in fact need to spend non-social-media time and effort in learning about them.

If you're at a university, there are often subject catalogues, reference librarians, and other built-in tools that are there for you to use and which you SHOULD use (that's your tuition money, after all). That can help you identify trustworthy information sources and research best practices, and as you do that more often, it will help you have more of a feel for things when you encounter them in the wild. It's not easy at first, but once you get the hang of it, it becomes more so, and will make you more confident in your own judgments, beliefs, and values. That way when you encounter something that you KNOW is wrong, you won't be automatically pressured to share it just to fit in, because you will be able to tell yourself what the problems are.

Good luck!

[alternativetulpar]

« Ask Daisuke and Anya »

Me mostly. Until Daisuke's well enough to make responses.

He is very excited about this account. It's the closest to reaching out to anyone we've had this entire trip, aha.

The others might reply to asks if you all want to hear from them. Though, that depends on how eager they are to respond.

{Everyone are taking asks}

[[Ooc]]

So. Had an au idea and when you can't do comics, what's a better idea than an ask blog? It's interactive, it's fun, and it's just fun - don't know what else to add.

Other role-play blogs please interact ♡

This blog will be a mix of Text and Art responses so yeah. And the rules basically don't exist so go crazy w it:]

{{Parent account is @floppedwo ! I post more art related stuff + will answer questions there about the au itself. This is just meant to be a fun interactive blog overall}}

[ungodlysaltyinfrastructure]

Hey… so uh… Alux witnessing his mother die in front of him, anyone?

Aha. So um. I inexplicably went missing on tumblr...

Why? I tried deleting an experimental side blog I didn't need/want, and because I don't know how tumblr works, I had actually deleted my main account (Note to self, never venture off into the account settings, WITHOUT CHECKING WHICH BLOG IM ON) I was devastated about it, but, it may have been a good thing for me, question mark? I had been embroiled in toxic queer discourse (aphobia sucks), and it took a toll on my mental well-being. So I took this unfortunate deletion of my work as a sign to relax a bit, despite the pit of panic that formed when this happened. Luckily, I'm better! (again >_>) and I still love Alux Rising, so here I am, making my grand return! back at it again with more way too long character analysis!

I would've posted about my abrupt leaving of tumblr sooner as I was eager to explain everything, but then AR 14 dropped soooooooooooo

Okay. Ar 14. Just made me incredibly happy. A major thing that had been missing for me was actual depictions of Alux as a child. He goes on about how his childhood was rough, but we never actually got to see such. Only the aftermath of such childhood with his relationship to Elric.

Now that we've seen it,

Oh God. It explains, a lot. I always thought Alux acted weird, so much so that I started to theorize that he was *actually* autistic/ASD (More Asperger's Syndrome but that term is no longer used)

But now…

I still hold firm in my Autistic Aro Alux Headcanon, but now his “lack of character” makes more sense to me.

It's made out that Alux's lack of character was prominent in his childhood, as his mother says that one day, he'll learn to like whatever he likes, and he'll be his own person, inferring that he doesn't understand that yet as a child. That's really intriguing to me. Apparently, his blandness was apparent in his childhood, and now in his adulthood. And it seems that the only thing he fully knows how to do, is to help people. If this lack of uniqueness to his character was in his childhood, then maybe the fact that Alux is bland is a defining character trait for him. One that will be overridden by this developing story of Alux rising. (Aha! Character development!)

Now, in relation to Alux and his parents.

It seems like he followed his mom more than his dad. That's why he brings her up in his and Elric's argument, and why he says “I like what you like!” and “I want to be just like you” To her in the memory.

And upon further rewatching, my heart just broke.

In the memory, Alux's mom says “But remember to be the best version of yourself, and to treat others how you want to be treated.”

How does Alux treat others currently? *He constantly helps them. protecting them, making sure they're OK.*

*sigh*...

Ok.

I'm really glad that we got this flash back. It actually helps put some character into Alux (even if it being trauma) and his lack of reaction to a lot of things makes much more sense. Even after the whole flashback, his lack of talking about the memory for why he had such a strong reaction feels very realistic considering the circumstances.

Another thing I realized, when Alux snaps out of it, the surrounding magic of green crystals is the orchids. I'm crying.

It most definitely seems like witnessing his mother's death stunted Alux's mental development to a degree, mostly in the sense that he doesn't fully know who he is, what he wants, or what he likes with what seemed to be his only supporting figure in his life now gone. If he still had his mother, maybe he would've turned out differently. (Wow shocker, I know.)

And honestly, we all knew Alux was traumatized, but I did not expect it to be to THIS extent. I just thought his mom died of an illness, and he wasn't there to see it but she was gone.

I was. SO WRONG.

Dead wrong. One could say.

Like Alux's mom- *cough*

anyways- yea Alux's nickname should definitely be Horny, Professor Red- oops, sorry *GEARS* comes up with the best nicknames, in fact he should become president and deliver every presidential speech in his rhyming scheme.

Oh and James is not dead,

Apparently.

[spartanseagoat]

Taurus Full Moon 24°(Pisces degree)

This full moon is special!

Why?

Because this is the last full moon in Taurus we will have while Pluto in Capricorn, they will trine each other by 5° orb(distance)

This Full Moon is also conj Uranus Taurus and fixed star Algol!

But wait.. there’s more!!

Now based on astronomy, a Full Moon can be up to at least 3 days. So even though, the full moon is in Taurus, it will also be in Gemini.

Jupiter is currently in Gemini 19°(Libra degree) and its retrograded.

Now whenever we have a Taurus or Libra transit, we have to look at Venus. Whenever we have a Gemini or Virgo Transit, we have to look at Mercury

Venus is currently in Capricorn 4°(Cancer degree)

Mercury is currently in Sagittarius 16° (cancer degree). Mercury is also pre-shadow period before it goes rx on the 25th.

With Venus being Capricorn, let’s look at Saturn.

Saturn is currently in Pisces at 12°(Pisces degeee) and it just stationed direct this morning!

What to Expect?

Something shocking or unexpected happening the next few days. It could be related to our economy, personal finances, our home such as selling or moving.

This is really a good time to journal or reminisce everything you’ve been through the last 16 years as we start to wrap up this Pluto Capricorn transit. You are completing a long cycle. What have you learned during this time. You may be quitting a long term career but isn’t happy, maybe you’ll get promoted or finally recognize for your hard work. Having a difficult conversation with your parents. You’ll probably learn something new about their past or they’ll reveal something to you.

For the past few months, you may have felt lost or didn’t know where or what to do with your life at the moment. There’s a level of fear and uncertainty in the air. Starting today and the next few days, it’ll hit you randomly, you’ll get that “Aha!” Moment. You may start to see things a bit clearly and some sort of path to your future. There’s thunderclouds are slowly disappearing.

One word: BOUNDARIES! you’re not playing anymore, you’re establishing some tough boundaries on everything and everyone. Ppl thought they can fu$k around with you, now you’re about to let them find out!

Traveling, you could be researching countries to travel or even move abroad. Ppl will be applying or renewing their visas. You could be house haunting during this time as well. Writing, blogging, clearing out old emails, waiting for an important email. Car troubles, wanting to buy a new car, your thoughts being on overload and feeling like an unhinged gremlin 😆

Mental health will be something ppl will think about. You may prioritize your mental which can result removing toxic patterns or people from your life. Some people will start this journey of healing, others will look at their progress. You could be scheduling a doctors appointment for a checkup

You’re breaking old structures and building something new. This has been a long process but you’re doing the damn thing!! Celebrate your wins, learn from your losses and keep being a boss

Drink water

Listen to some music and sing out loud. Taurus rules the throat

May you all have a beautiful full moon experience

[ask-the-magic-girl]

and to think this all started with a parental figure tier list😔

(oo uhm actually the forth ask on this blog was me too)

IVE BEEN HERE SINCE YOUR (probably) FOURTH ASK WHICH I WORDED RLLY WEIRDLY BC I WAS TIRED AHA

OOC: you have lol

Thanks for inspiring me to create over ten ask blogs crayon. ur like. One of my first online friends :)

[ozzgin]

Honestly, if you think about it…the monsters and reader from the monster husband stories could be descendants of the reader from the monster heartbreaker reader 🤔

Think about it. Monster heartbreaker reader has tons of babies with all different types of monster baby daddies. Those children would all have some type of super recessive human gene, (I imagine monster genes to be extremely dominant). As those children go on to have children of their own through each generation, to the point of being all super distantly related to each other, they’d inevitably marry each other and start families. This could result in some babies being mostly human as the recessive human gene was present enough from the monster parents. Thus, you now have many families that present as full monsters, half monsters, or human 🧐

Please don’t mistake me as trying to romanticize incest or anything, cause I’m truly not. I’m just basing this thought on human science/anthropology. In real life all humans are pretty much related to each other as we all share a pair of ancestors. But this is like a few 100,000+ years ago. So if you want to be “textbook technical,” all humans are distant cousins, but like 10,000+ generation of cousins…

I’m really just trying to have fun with your stories. I don’t want this to seem weird or misconstrued. I apologize if it’s too uncomfortable 🙇🏻‍♀️

-👘

I was wondering if the monster talk would summon you, and I knew from the first paragraph who’s typing 😂

I can definitely see it. Hell, by that logic we could reason that all monstrous creatures on this blog somehow stem from the original hoe Reader. Trying to connect the stories suddenly made me think, what if the inventor descendant and their Frankenstein creature might be related to the dreaded asylum where the sewer spider was put together? Aha! Thus, we return to Descartes’ words: all truths are linked with one another. Perhaps the monster fucking universe was not so fragmented after all.

Now, I’ve sadly been doodling a little too much these days, so I might return with an actual product later, but I’m envisioning a Byzantine painting depicting Reader and her horde of monsters as the Genesis of humanity and…horror? Is there an official collective noun for monsters? Plus everything in between. It could be the welcome banner. 🕊️

Also, just to make it clear for you and everyone else here: you absolutely don’t have to worry about making me uncomfortable. I’ve been on the Internet for a long time, enough to guarantee you I can handle pretty much everything. You can always speak freely with me. (You’ve also said much more unhinged things before, let’s not forget the cum sheets Hall of Fame ok)

[peachiecure]

Character introduction: Larissa/“Cure Jump”

~Basic info~

Name: Larissa Frausto

“Alter Ego”: Cure Jump

Age: 13

Birthday: September 22

Hair color: Brown (w/ red ombré as “Jump”)

Eye color: Brown (Blue as “Jump”)

Larissa is a girl from another world who happens to visit from time to time. She holds the ability to transform into a magical girl known as “Cure Jump”. She is a side character in Project: SFA.

Larissa is a very shy and awkward person. She often is seen to be either panicking, not able to put out words or trying her best to do what is asked of her. Coming from another world, her surroundings here seem to fascinate her in a way as if she has been observing from the outside for a long time. In her free time, she seems to like to draw and play video games.

Her “Alter Ego”, Cure Jump on the other hand is much different in personality. She is strong willed, brave, leader-like and overall a joy to be around… she fights with the power of fire, along with a few other new tricks up her sleeve that she learns from Mario as they protect the kingdom at times. Though… there seems to be something behind those blue eyes of hers.

For more information on Larissa & Cure Jump, including more details and voice claims, please visit the side blog @nintendoprecure for her intros there~

A Precure? What’s that?

For my non-precure fans here, it’s a magical girl franchise. If you’re familiar with the concepts Sailor Moon or Cardcaptor Sakura, it’s pretty similar. Hopefully you don’t need to know that much about the franchise to understand the concept. A lot of precure fans like to make OCs, and that is where Larissa is from. So yeah it’s another project of mine. Larissa transforms and fights for what’s good with the power of her transformation device! (Which is a 3DS aha) She pops into SFA every now and then. You don’t need to dive deep into my other project though to understand her role in SFA, so I hope she is still a fun character to SFA’s overall story and lore. Just know that she pops in every now and then, helping out the best she can!

~Relationships~

Mario: “O-oh— I need to talk about Mario? U-um— he… he talks much more than I imagined… I’m so used to hearing reused voice lin— I MEAN from what I’ve heard from others!! He’s very nice!! I’m… I’m not good at socializing… at all. He seems to care about me though… I-I just feel that I’m to… incompetent to be standing by his side. He always tells be how I do such a good job as Jump but… I’m n— I mean, yeah I’m… Jump… but— sigh, never mind.”

Peach: “I could cry. I gonna cry. I-I can’t just cry?… she’s everything to me… seeing her in front of me physically of course I’m going to cry!! SHE’S MY FAVORITTTEEEE…. MY QUEEN…. And she’s so nice to me too I’m crying. I-I’m sorry I’m crying. I can’t help it. Little kid me prayed for moments like this… oh my gosh—“ (the rest is incoherent, we cannot understand her through her sobbing)

Sweetheart: “Finding out that Peach and Mario were married was one thing… but finding out they have a child… was something else entirely. I didn’t know how to process that information— my ship— I mean I’m very happy for them!!! Sweetheart herself is a very sweet little girl… well… she’s currently 10 but her behavior is very pure. Sometimes I think she looks up to me like an older sister which… I-I am an older sister in my family but I— I don’t feel like one. I’m cowardly, but she somehow finds the good in me when I’m around and wants to do things with me… her parents have explained the… situation with her powers, so I do have to keep an eye on her just in case anything happens.”

Luigi: “… I like Luigi, he… he really understands me when I can’t really get words out of my mouth… or… or when Mario drags the two of us somewhere impulsively as we’re both worrying… it is also surreal seeing him talk in front of me… oh my good they’re real the Super Mario Bros. are real and they’re in front of my oh my god. I’m gonna explode….”

Daisy: “Daisy has so much energy that she really overwhelms me— but not in a bad way! I really like her I’m just… I-I just like to take things slower and stuff. She’s a wonderful princess! She really cares about her friends and she would definitely fistfight a god for them!…”

Rosalina: “Mario brought me to the Observatory once and… it felt very weird to be able to breathe in space— where I’m from you— you can’t do that you’ll die. I got to meet Rosalina and the Lumas, and I really had a nice time with her. She’s gentle and made sure I felt comfortable and safe in her home… even read me a few stories from her iconic storybook that surely the soundtrack— I mean the music that so happens to play around when she reads— has not made me cry! Not at all!—“

Flame: “Flame is a new face I met upon coming here. I’ve never heard of his Kingdom at all. He seems like a nice kid who just wants to have fun with his friends. He-he’s very panicky, like me, so I— I relate a lot with him. He seems to always fight with Aqua and… I can’t blame him on that. Aqua… is… something… I just find it a bit odd how he always does what Sweetheart says?… I-I hope he’s only doing that because he wants to be a good friend…”

Aqua: “… C-can I tell the truth?—I-I don’t currently like him. I hate sounding mean but— he reminds me of someone from school with his spoiled attitude and I just can’t stand how he constantly arguing with Flame… there’s still a-a lot I don’t know about him, so I am open to change my view on him. It just seems like he isn’t willing to tell anything besides what he wants us to hear… and I don’t want to pry… I won’t say it to his face though, that’s just mean… he hasn’t really DONE anything to hurt me yet so I wouldn’t talk back… not like I ever would in the first place… he’s royalty…”

Toadsworth: “Toadsworth started calling me Master Jump after one battle and… I cannot get used to the title. I am no master at… anything. Unless it’s crying, I’m… very good at that… ahaha… ha….”

~Rumors~

“Yeah I’m… I’m not related to the Mario Bros… I-I don’t know why that’s such a popular rumor… I’m not even Italian… ahaha… w-wait who thinks I’m related to Mario—? Is it because of my brown hair?— o-or how I’m small?… I’m simply just learning alongside him… because of Ju— because I’m a magical girl!…”

And that’s it for Larissa’s intro! Next will be… well, a certain jester…

[musicoftheheart]

intro post!!

totally didnt just forget to do one of these lol

hi! my name is dorian (or dori!), im 20, and i use all pronouns, in order of preference: they/she/he :))

anyone is more than welcome to reach out in dms and say hi! id prefer though that only mutuals can ask for more personal information <3

a fun fact: im a musician! ive so far written three complete songs (you can listen to one of them here!), and have a few more partially written (i might one day post them on here, but im not brave enough yet aha) i do post sometimes about my favourite music/musicians though :)

edit: here’s a master list of all my posted music!

fandoms:

marauders era

bbc merlin

heartstopper

percy jackson

good omens (recent)

spiderman/mcu (to an extent)

follow #dorian's writing rambles (tagged below!) to keep up with stuff i post about my writing, including snippets, updates, and random comments about my process!

ao3: music_of_the_heart

marauders:

hold me tight (and never let me go) — chapters: 44/??, WIP word count: 145.6k, jegulus + wolfstar with background marylily, dorlene, rosekiller, fake dating. next update: TBD.

crush — chapters: 3/3, word count: 4.4k, jegulus, background wolfstar, secret relationship, tie swap

im the worst if you want it — chapters: 1/1, word count: 1.5k, jegulus, background wolfstar, one night stand with awkward 'first' meeting after

bbc merlin:

the prince of dracia — chapters: 11/11, word count: 15.9k, pre-relationship merthur, royal!merlin

the waiting game — chapters: 1/1, word count: 777, no stated relationships, ban of magic lifted

the dragon king — chapters: 1/1, word count: 2.8k, no stated relationships, dragon!merlin

heartstopper:

american dream — chapters: 19/??, WIP word count: 44.7k, nick/charlie with background canon relationships, american!charlie. next update: unknown

out of proportion — chapters: 1/1, word count: 4k, nick/charlie, tw self harm

im fine... sorry — chapters: 9/9, word count: 10.7k, nick/charlie with background canon relationships, sick fic

i hate u (i love u) — chapters: 1/1, word count: 980, nick/charlie, breakup, tw for mh issues

tumblr microfics:

That Time of the Month — word count:~570, trans!regulus, wolfstar + jegulus

Bambi-Eyes — word count: ~420, jegulus engagement, background wolfstar + nobleflower mentioned

No. — word count: ~650, jegulus angst, hurt no comfort, wolfstar mentioned

Where's the- Oh. — word count: ~550, wolfstar engagement mishap

Teach Me To Fight — word count: ~630, jegulus, regulus going against his parents <3

For You, My Love — word count: ~660, jegulus, death eater james

my blog is a safe space for anyone who needs, and asks/interaction is always welcome! enjoy <3

[blackfeatherquill]

A Decade of Tumblr

I forgot what an outlet Tumblr was for me.

When I was in highschool, my boyfriend at the time had a Tumblr so I made one too. Then him and I broke up and I ended up with someone new who also had a Tumblr.

I would scroll for hours on my laptop, or spend hours writing about my relationships and highschool and some of the things I was struggling with. I learned how to HTML, my mouse was Bart Simpson and when you clicked, fireworks shot out of his finger tip. I would discover new artists and writers, elevate my own writing by learning from these talented people. I could be weird, dark and freaky in this strange corner of the internet with little to no opposition or repulsion. It was a secret place from my parents where I could be my self but also let my pain flow. Let pain break free from the dams I had built in my heart.

My blog picked up quite a few followers along the way. People were most interested in my new relationship, and would bounce between our two blogs asking questions, asking for pictures and updates. We loved making gifs of us kissing, or of us looking at each other with unending love dazzling in our eyes, hickeys adorning our necks. As any highschool relationship, it really was packed with melodrama, sex, emotion and toxicity between us. I can see why people were so enthralled. We were practically a reality TV show.

The last thing I posted to that blog was a letter to my now ex after the breakup. I wrote about how they would forever be my first true love and despite all the heartbreak and the end of our relationship, I would always love them. The letter was more for me than for them, I needed to say goodbye in a way that they couldn't respond. I needed a selfish, one sided piece of closure just for me. I let it soak to make sure they saw it, and then I just deleted the entire blog.

It was like I deleted us.

The pictures, silly messages, lengthy bad poetry, our secrets, grungy, angsty still-captures that felt so relatable. Gone.

And it was so much more than that. I threw away friends, followers and connection. Art, writing, porn and photography that seemed to have altered my cellular make up. My blog was little pieces of me stitched together on a digital platform. A true look into my inner workings, like "Aha! That's what makes this clock tick!"

Tumblr was the safe place from my parents and my brothers, a home that never felt like I quite fit in. Where I felt like an obnoxious piece of furniture, too bulky to throw away, and irritating to the occupants of the house.

On Tumblr, I wasn't the weird girl at school. I wasn't the obnoxious piece of furniture. I wasn't the youngest girl in AA meeting.

I wasn't a victim. I wasn't a survivor.

I was a writer. I was an art lover. I was beautiful. I was a conversationalist. I was all the good things about me, and all the good things about me came with the unending oceans of emotion that was just too much for the real world.

And Tumblr world was okay with that.

And I deleted the world.

Now many years have gone by. Close to a decade I would say. Life is stable. My highschool sweetheart still lives in a little pocket in my heart of small, not so meaningful, yet sweet memories tinged with end of day, golden sunlight.

But with stability, I've lost pieces of myself. I've found myself in a routine that most adults find themselves in, a slave to the capitalistic machine. I desperately spend my days collecting money so I can support myself and my animals. Keep us fed. My days off are spent cleaning, the one indulgence for me is a small vegetable garden in my tiny allotment of land. I only take pictures when family is together. I look at art when my best friend and I are visiting, but she lives in Illinois now. And I only write when I'm in pain.

Pain. The Pain so great the dams of my heart were beginning to crack. Writing in my notes app became a secret thing I had done, I think the people in this chapter of my life would be surprised to know I love to write. A moment in front of a Georgia O'Keefe at the Art Institute of Chicago where I brushed my tears away quickly so no one would see. The writer in me, the art lover in me, has been silenced by a decade of fitting in. Go to work, buy a house, cook dinner, clean the house, go to work, die two days after retirement.

I needed someone to know what this man had said to me to make this dam threaten to burst. I looked to my left, I looked to my right and I saw spikes of judgment and misunderstanding lining walls that were closing in on all directions, slowly inching towards me. I had inadvertently surrounded myself with people who loved the fake me, because I've been faking it for so long.

So I googled "Anonymous journal, not Live Journal, Reddit." The first suggestion was Tumblr.

How could I forget about Tumblr? Memories flooded me that inched a smile onto my face. The Bart Simpson curser, the Senses Fail song that blared when my page was opened. My avatar, my hair swept over my eye and a low cut black striped sweater. Grainy gifs of me biting their lower lip. Paragraphs upon paragraphs of my deepest feelings. Art work that had taken my breath away. Silly asks and messages.

I had to go back.

And here I found myself back again in a world that is so familiar. A world I'll keep secret, but where I'm a god again. Where my writing can go, where I can collect art, writing, photography and soft pornography into one space. Where I can be dark and freaky, take off the plastic smile of customer service and Good Housekeeping. A place to take a breath, and just be sad for a little while. Let the dam break, surge then calm into a soft, still lake.

[multishipper33]

i've heard i can tell you random ships and you rate them, so i'm curious what you think of my favorites

will graham x hannibal lecter

crazy cannibalistic chef psychiatrist, he sometimes is a consultant for the fbi and has to look at murders he committed (it's so silly goofy) x former fbi man who just wants to stay at home with his dogs but people want him to solve murders, he's going crazy

dean winchester x castiel

a monster hunter with a grain of self worth and a mountain of suicidalness x an angel who literally rebels against god for his love, and will do anything for him (they're both so depressed)

evan 'buck' buckley x eddie diaz

bisexual firefighter with no self worth, and thinks his only purpose is to care for others (he loves co parenting eddies child) x former military personnel with anger issues and a child he will do anything for, he's so traumatized

wow i dunno how so many ships got here, huh they're all gay and sad and complicated who could've thought

alright *cracks knuckles, even though I can’t do that* let’s do this

will graham x hannibal lecter - mm. okay. so, coming from the perspective of someone who has never watched this and who has made many inside jokes about the subject matter… the cannibalism puts me off. “if you love me consume me” is the new “if you love me let me go”?? bro i can’t sign up for that. to me it’s the separation. let me explain how this is justified. say this lector guy is also a person-eater. say he likes to feed his subjects well before roasting them over an open fire like bœuf bourguignon and oh! will likes to do that too. you two can make sweet sweet love after you’ve consumed your family of four. but to have one of them be a cannibal? lector would either a) fear for his life constantly despite his love for this man, or b) be blindsided and lose trust once he finds out the truth. this… isn’t for me.

destiel - alright we’re getting something good here! and let me explain how this isn’t a power imbalance. first of all, they’re both powerful. it’s like if everyone was overpowered, that wouldn’t be op. that would just be tuesday. this dean guy, he’s a monster hunter. “oh, so he’s hunting down cas? toxic much??” shut up, jeremy. you’re not quite right, not quite wrong, but remember this key little detail: cas is an angel. “aha! that’s still a power imbalance.” both of those wouldn’t be?? they’d cancel each other out and I like that. these guys who I know next to nothing about are my babies. they are not toxic and I like that, despite my love of… well, jornoth. bonus points for a) not being Wincest (although I did like that little joke during the ship bracket: IT’S NOT LOSECEST), b) the destiel meme news blog, c) showing up on my fyp (??), and d) you seemed very keysmash-y about them for a while.

evan ‘buck’ buckley x eddie diaz - ohhh this is that stranger thing that the kids are on nowadays? with the horror?? well I adore this actually. you go, bisexual firefighter. extinguish that flame. and the deep-seated belief of needing to care and care and care?? oof, hits hard after watching a certain k-drama. and then we’ve got anger issues + child, which just makes my day. these two seem cute. they will get up to shenanigans and have emotional discoveries. it will be depressing and hilarious. the little kid will also be hilarious. 100k words, strangers to lovers, slow burn. no more notes honestly they just seem great, minus points for the. uh. creepy crawlies and roaring monsters and blood oh god why the blood-

now for my final rating…

the cannibal guy and the dog guy - 1.3/10

destiel - 8.6/10

bisexual firefighter x anger issues - 8.9/10

total score: 18.8/30

this was fun I like doing this

[uroboros-if]

Hello!! I have a question regarding the parents :DD

I was wondering, do Nero and Raphaele have any hobbies or activities they like to do whenever they have some freetime? I remember that Nero likes to wander in places where flora and fauna are abundant, but I was wondering if there would be anything else he'd like to do to casually pass the time whenever he's at home. The same question goes for Raphaele!

They must be quite busy, what with being gods and all, but maybe there's something they like to do during moments of quiet when they just want to stay at home?

I'm also quite curious about the ROs' hobbies, but please only answer for them if you feel like it 🫡✨I just think that knowing the hobbies of MC's parents — if they have them — could be a fun way to imagine what MC's childhood with them was like, as well as how they may have been influenced by their parents. Thank you, and I hope you have a very good day!! 🤺✨💐

Aha! One of the very earliest asks that I received on this blog ever was asking if the gods have any hobbies!

My following response applies to all the gods, including Nero and Rafaele! This ask got unnecessarily long, so putting it under the readmore <3

To reiterate — no, they don't really have many hobbies. If they have hobbies, they mainly pertain to their role. Before their active involvement in mortal affairs, they were content to observe from afar, give very indirect guidance, meditate, and walk through nature in solitude.

Ever since the unification, they've began taking on a more proactive role, especially since the advent of the second generation of gods began to embody more abstract concepts such as love, wealth, and gratitude—concepts that could only have come forth from a world with social relationships. Second generation gods, then, tend to be more present in the human eye, though all deities are advised not to interact with mortals often. There are only a handful of gods who are exempted.

The Twelve, who are more naturalistic deities whose domains include the seas, the land, the winds and so forth, are less likely to have any interesting hobbies other than observation, meditation and admiring nature. Second generation gods, however, may take to more "human" kind of activities (e.g. Quin, one of the deities of love, is particular to fashion).

It goes without saying, almost all of them enjoy spending time with loved ones.

While this may seem dull, time passes by differently for immortals, especially those who've lived longer. One learns to take pleasure in life's simplicities.

I apologize this is such a blanket answer for the fathers, since I know you're particularly focused on them to create an idea of what MC's childhood may look like! For that, Nero and Rafaele would especially try to instill a sense of reverence and respect in MC for the natural world, like letting them dip their toes in the river or walk through grass with naked feet. Let the sunlight pour on their head, and listen to the sounds of the forest.

Lastly, the ROs. Luciel's only other distinctive hobby is reading, while Salvatore has little time — but they would try anything if given the opportunity! Ciocana is a learner by heart, with reading and people-watching in particular being their affinity, rather than animals or nature. Unlike Salvatore, they have the chance to practice human activities such as dancing. Alessi, as a mortal, naturally has more varied hobbies such as cooking, gardening, training, and so forth.

I hope that gives you more ideas!! Thank you so much for sending an ask, Aspen 🥺🥺💕💕 your lore questions are always a treat!

[celestialtitania]

reading year in review

ty @bittersweetresilience beloved for the tag. i have gone diving deep into the archives to pull these out (about 140 pages into my history on ao3 to be exact)...so just about every month has around 2 fics. until i did this i had no idea i read THIS MUCH. insanity.

very long post so under the cut

January

#thatjacksonkid by the_german_grim_reaper (Percy Jackson & the Olympians)

Following an episode of Buzzfeed Unsolved, several twitter users do their best to uncover the truth about Percy Jackson. They get surprisingly far.

hilarious. the fic had me in stitches. i love a good outsider pov and esp when it has mortals look into the godly world. it really puts into perspective how crazy their lives are without context.

Internet Friends by limited_edge (My Hero Academia)

All For One, like many other individuals, has non-violent hobbies. Said hobbies result in him trying to troll quirk analyst SmallMight41 online and getting repeatedly (and accidentally) wrecked in the process.

izuku getting the chance to spar with afo, even mentally, is one of the best gifts of fandom. i love seeing izuku winning and afo seething. this fic had me intrigued, in awe, and on tenterhooks the whole time i was reading.

February

Primary Sources (And Historical Epiphanies) by hoover_the_fish (Miraculous Ladybug)

Mary Beauréal hates history, so she's not too jazzed for the history reports and group presentations that Caline Bustier assigns for her class. However, the people in her life have an odd connection to an era her teacher refers to only as, "Ladybug and Chat Noir," a connection that none of them seem to want to remember. "For some reason, there aren’t a whole lot of newspaper articles, but there’s an old blog online that might be worth checking out. As far as I know all the pictures, interviews, the articles that still exist- they all ended up there at some point or another." "Do you know what it's called?" "I believe she named it the Ladyblog."

ive been following this fic for awhile and the MYSTERY has me hooked. this fic is so much more than it seems and it has me so very invested.

fishing in alaska by CaffeinatedFlummadiddle (Percy Jackson & the Olympians)

“This… this would qualify as a mental breakdown, right?” Triton asked, frowning over his shoulder to where Percy was still fuming in the corner. The lady at the counter curiously glanced over before lifting a questioning brow. “My brother – half-brother, technically, I have much better breeding – decided to run away from home to where our father can’t reach him and now he won’t leave. And now I can’t leave unless he leaves,” Triton continued. Percy opened his mouth to object that wasn’t what happened at all, but the tyrant only waved a hand to silence him. “He’s seen war or whatever, so if you could maybe just drug him then I’ll throw him into a suitcase and we can be out of here by the Summer Solstice!” Silence. Finally, the woman cleared her throat and turned to Percy. “I’m guessing he’s the one you want checked into the mental hospital?” She asked. Triton gasped as Percy punched the air in victory. “Aha!” Or Getting in trouble works a little differently when your parent is an all-powerful god. Sometimes you have to escape to the land beyond gods and get your immortal brother turned human to drag you back so you can be exploded a million pieces. You know, normal teenage stuff.

one of my favourite fics of all time, ive read this so many times. So Many Times. ao3 says 37 and i believe it. there is comedy, there is angst, and the emotional beats are to die for. 11/10 would recommend.

Life is A Dream by selenemoon (Avatar: The Last Airbender)

One minute Aang and Appa were fighting a storm, the next Aang was holding a baby. When two soulmates are asleep at the same time they create a dreamscape instead of dreaming. Aang has been sleeping a long time. Long enough to raise five soulmates... (Aang is really tired given how long he's been sleeping.)

love seeing the gaang grow up. really taking a closer look into their childhoods is so fun, and they're so babey but true to character. amazing fic.

March

In A Moment Like This by dreamlittleyo (BBC Merlin)

When Prince Arthur vanishes in the middle of a hunt, replaced by a significantly older—and more kingly—version of himself from the future, the world goes a bit topsy turvy. This really isn't Merlin's fault. But somehow, he needs to fix it anyway.

time travel? magic? shenanigans? you can't get me more hooked.

hidden by glacialdawn (Spy x Family)

"Opayshun Sticks gonna fail?" Anya mumbles, fast asleep. Loid freezes on the spot.

coming from the ml fandom, i love a good reveal fic and man does this deliver.

April

Egg-legant Parents by Ewq1111 (Spy x Family)

The kids have to take care of caterpillars, Damian is more concerned why Anya and Glooman are laughing.

this fic is just pure silly. i love those chapters when the kids are goofing around at eden and this fic is exactly that.

a small world, isn't it? by marzipan_maples (My Hero Academia)

Shouto realises there's never a dull moment when it comes to his boyfriend. OR, alternatively: Two times Midoriya Izuku accidentally met Todoroki Rei and the one time it was on purpose.

this may be a tododeku fic on the surface but its really such a character study on rei at the same time. i just love the interactions between the characters and how well portrayed the todoroki family is in how much they care for each other despite the dysfunction.

May

it runs in the family by cloudyheaven (My Hero Academia)

It takes Nana three seconds of knowing Izuku Midoriya to know Toshinori chose the right successor. Or, sometimes a family can be just you, your emotional support Gran Torino, your #1 hero pseudo-son, your adopted grandson, and your adopted grandson's mother.

found family is my kryptonite. just all the wholesome vibes ever.

it's raining, it's pouring (i need you here 'cause i'm a mess) by bleugris (trivia_cypher) (My Hero Academia)

It's raining and Shouto is exhausted, physically and emotionally. It's been hell the past few weeks and his friend, the one person who can possibly understand, is gone, but when Shouto comes face to face with Midoriya again, he realizes that maybe he isn't the one his friend needs, no matter how much Shouto needs him.

ANGST. PINING. TODODEKU. does it get better than this? i dont think so.

June

room to grow by Mysecretfanmoments (Haikyuu)

Third year Kageyama is considerate, careful, doesn't grab Hinata's hair. Hinata's still trying to figure out how he feels about it.

as the title says, just them growing and developing their relationship together. i fully enjoyed them maturing but still being their silly volleyball obsessed selves.

i've been waiting to smile by themorninglark (Haikyuu)

And he’s calling him Shouyou like they’re old friends already. So, Hinata decides, they must be. (or, The Unlikely Tale of how Hinata Shouyou builds an odd friendship with a super-smart, super-quiet rival setter.)

kenhina my beloved. *and* canon compliant. it fills in all the missing gaps and shows just how they became such good friends despite living so far from each other, just what i needed to be fulfilled, really.

July

A Completely Normal Cooking Show by CoreyWW (Omori)

The dream always ended the same, but the start kept changing. This time, the beginning was Hero on his own cooking show.

chills. literal chills down my spine. this was so intense and well written. a psychological horror piece indeed.

all lights turned off can be turned on by Toasted_Waffles (Fairy Tail)

“Loke…” Lucy whispers. “Is there anything I can do to help you? You seem so…sad.” “Maybe you could distract me from my troubles,” Loke blurts. He follows a sudden impulse, allowing his intense homesickness to guide his voice, “I’m curious. Which spirits do you have contracts with?” or: Ever since Karen died, Loke’s been fading away, mentally and physically. Lucy brings some light back to his life.

nothing like hurt/comfort from the early arcs.

August

monster by FireDragonPhia (Fairy Tail)

Monster. How many times has someone called him that?

a natsu dragneel character study. everyone portrays him as super goofy and silly so its nice to delve into his mind and see the serious stuff going in there.

stars on the water by liketolaugh (Percy Jackson & the Olympians)

"I dunno, I just think it would make a lot of things easier for a lot of people," Percy said to Thalia, when she just stared at him. His cheek rested in his hand, a rare pensive look leaving his eyes distant and unfocused. "Mom has Paul now, so it’ll be easier on her if she doesn’t have to worry about me mucking things up. Dad won’t have to keep threatening war every time Zeus gets his toga twisted. The prophecy’s done, so I won’t be bringing it down on Nico. And no one will have to worry about me blowing up another volcano."

this one. this one was....A Lot. in a good way. it's a percy goes to therapy after the og series fic and it really dives deep into some dark areas. watching percy heal from it was beautifully done. pls check the tags carefully if anyone decides to read this, because you definitely need to be in a good space to read this.

September

Lingering Memory of You by ReaderError72 (Fairy Tail)

Natsu seems to be the only one in Fairy Tail that's aware something is missing. Day: Twelve: "Can you feel me? I'm right here"

nothing like whump for the soul.

October

water into wine by magnuschases (Percy Jackson & the Olympians)

Dionysus accidentally claims Percy. They both take advantage of it. (five times percy was the son of dionysus and one time he was the son of poseidon)

one of The best things to come out of the tv show. i said what i said.

All Roads Lead to Your Grave by nemali (Original Fiction)

this fic was like being hit by pure lightning. you think you know exactly where it's going and it does not go there. drove me insane in the best way possible.

November

dots of stars by Ladykyriaa (Apothecary Diaries)

As he took on a closer look, he realized she looked rather…different, today. Her hair was the same, the usual half ponytail and several strands of hair divided on either side. Her clothes were the usual green robe and brick red skirt. Her freckles was.. Hm?

a bit of a charcter study...or perhaps relationship study. digging beneath the surface and connecting it with the future knowledge is so rewarding to read.

December

Through the Decades...Hour by Hour by TicoryBlues (My Hero Academia)

Against all the odds, through a dozen eras and seven billion people at any given point of time, he had the ill luck of running into Midoriya Izuku. Every. Fucking. Time. Or Immortal Izuku and Time Traveller Katsuki and their non-linear love story

this fic made me whole and broke me apart all over again. and i would read it again. and again. and again.

the love quirk by minimeowngi (My Hero Academia)

For Katsuki and Izuku, their last day of work studies takes a dangerous turn when a villain's quirk alters everything they thought they knew about each other. Katsuki, usually fierce and aloof, wakes up acting uncharacteristically sweet and protective toward Izuku—a behavior that the class can't ignore and Izuku can't explain. While the pros scramble to reverse the quirk's effects, Izuku finds himself caught in a bittersweet dream—watching the person he's always loved shower him with affection, knowing it's not real. As Katsuki's obsession grows, Izuku battles his own emotions, torn between cherishing their fleeting connection and bracing for the inevitable heartbreak when the quirk is undone.

aka the fic i am currently obsessed with. i read every update immediately, as soon as i can. so so SO excited to see where it's going.

phew. that was so many. wow. i def read less in the final few months as i got busy with work, and also concentrated on reading more long fics but still, that was so many fics. at least this way i found some i don't remember and plan to reread hehe. not sure who hasn't been tagged but anyone who feels like it, is free to join!!

[twilightmalachite]

PORTRAIT - Ah, still delay—thou art so ■■■ 4

Author: Akira

Characters: Akiomi, Makoto, Izumi, Arashi

Translator: Mika Enstars

"I’ll kill you! I’ll kill you! I’ll kill you!"

[Read on my blog for the best viewing experience with Oi~ssu ♪]

Season: Winter

Location: Modeling Office

A couple minutes later, at the agency Kunugi Akiomi belongs to…

Akiomi: —I’ve returned!

(Whew… I only just came back, but I feel so very tired already!)

(I’ll grow old in no time at this rate. Just about ten years and I’m going to be decrepit!)

(It’ll be hard for me to continue my modeling career, and then I’ll be in a pinch!)

Makoto: ……

Akiomi: Oops, sorry. I had brushed you aside.

You can come in, Yuuki-kun.

Makoto: ……

Akiomi: (H-He’s kinda restless, isn’t he? He keeps looking around all over… He’s like a cautious small animal.)

(Maybe he’s a bit of a timid child. Maybe he’s scared, he absolutely refuses to make eye contact with me…)

(Well, I’m usually scared of places where only adults are present, too.)

Makoto: Onii-chan…

Akiomi: Ah, yes, Akiomi-oniichan is here~♪ Handshake~♪

Makoto: Not you… Where’s Onii-chan?

Akiomi: Ahh, you mean Sena-kun. But I told you as we walked here, I doubt he’s at our agency—

Izumi: Aaaaaahhhh!

Aaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhh!!

Akiomi: (He is here~!? And he’s on a rampage while making some sort of strange noise~!?)

Arashi: Akiomi, Akiomi.

Akiomi: Oh, Narukami-kun. You’re at the agency this late again? Your parents will begin to worry if you don’t head home soon, you know.

Arashi: Home’s fine. Instead, do something about him, please.

Izumi: Aaaaaaaaaahhhh!!

Akiomi: Umm… He’s hard to see since he’s in the dark, but that’s Sena-kun, isn’t it? What is he doing here? And why…?

Arashi: Please don’t flood me with questions.

Um, I’m not sure why, but apparently he’ll be working at our agency from today on.

Akiomi: Is that right? Come to think of it, the president did say something about a transfer to our agency, didn’t he…?

He didn’t look too happy about it though, so I figured it wasn’t anything like a famous model.

I see. So maybe that was Sena-kun he was talking about?

Arashi: I dunno. Instead, can you hurry and do something, Akiomi?

Akiomi: But I don’t know what I can do…

Akiomi: Uhh, Sena-kun, what’s wrong? Are you okay? If you cry, your eyes will turn red and interfere with work tomorrow, you know.

Arashi: Akiomi, you’re so bad at comforting others it’s almost sad.

Akiomi: I’m being pitied by a toddler!?

Izumi: Aaaagh! Shut up, shut up, shut up!

I’m quitting being a model! There’s no point if I can’t work with Yuu-kun! I hate hate HATE Papa and Mama!!

Akiomi: Huh, Yuu-kun?—

Makoto: Onii-chan!

Izumi: …!? Yuu-kun!

Makoto: It’s Onii-chan~…♪

Ehehe, it was true, Onii-chan really was here!

Thank you very much, umm, Akiomi…-oniichan.

It’s all thanks to you. I’m always indebted to you.

Izumi: Onii-chan? Yuu-kun, what are you calling this guy “Onii-chan”?

Izumi: Isn’t that supposed to be meee? Isn’t it I who's your Onii-chan, Yuu-kuuun?

Makoto: Mhm! ♪ But, this person is… Onii-chan, too?

Izumi: So you guys are a threat! You guys are my enemy! All of you, everyone in this agency is my enemy!!

Arashi: …… (Doesn’t say anything and smacks Izumi in the cheek)

Izumi: …!? Aaaahhh! Did you just hit meee!? I’ll kill you!

Akiomi: Wait, don’t fight! Why did you hit him, Narukami-kun?! You can’t use violence!

Arashi: ‘Cause he was annoying…He’s annoying and unpleasant and should just go away.

Izumi: I’ll kill you! I’ll kill you! I’ll kill you!

Akiomi: P-P-P-Please calm down, Sena-kun! I’ll make sure Narukami-kun apologizes!

Arashi: Why should I? Isn’t it his fault for making all that noise?

Makoto: Aha~♪ Onii-chan looks cheerful and happy today!

[ ☆ ]

← prev | story directory | next →

[perpetualxfire]

ooc: My Thoughts on Carolina

I have, in a very technical sense of the word given my low to near non-existent activity, claimed Carolina as my muse on this RP blog for... Almost a decade now? Since pretty close to the beginning of her existence as a character. And... In light of news re: 'Box Canyon Productions', I kind of got to thinking of my journey with her, so to speak. This post is a little rambly and maybe a little personal, but... I dunno, I guess I just needed it to exist? I'll put it under a read more, though.

It's strange, because I'd never felt as strongly drawn to a character before writing for her, and I've yet to find a character I'm as drawn to since; it's put me in kind of a weird spot, because I'd love to branch out, but nothing else feels 'right', and I'd love to interact with the community more, but my original RP crew has all moved on, and I'm shy as shit, aha. Not me complaining - just kind of the state of things, you know?

But I got to thinking today about, in depth, just why I developed such a strong connection to this completely fictional character in a (let's admit it) niche piece of media, and it's taken years of therapy for me to really understand it; I'm sure there's plenty that I don't understand, too.

I started writing her on Tumblr my Senior Year of High School (Year 13 for our UK crowd), and privately with a close group of friends about a year before that (while Season 9 was airing). A lot has changed about my interpretation since then, let me tell you. We've learned a lot about her, and I've learned a lot about myself.

In retrospect, it makes sense; I was an undiagnosed Autistic Child, a victim of emotional neglect (took a lot of time, but I don't blame my parents for it; none of us are great at emotion and communication, and we all have a lot to learn), and have since been diagnosed with PTSD (or CPTSD - sessions discussing it are... slow going) from some shit that I don't really want or need to disclose.

I know I'm not alone in this, but- picture this, if you will- a neurodivergent teen with trouble understanding and processing their own emotions, scared of a world that's too loud, unsure of what life has in store, desperate for some kind of connection in a seemingly un-tameable, incomprehensible sea of people, being introduced by an RP partner to a character who's also not great at emotional expression and communication who nevertheless appears to have her shit together and has proven herself incredibly competent in her field; a character that mirrors their own struggles to connect with family or friends, nevertheless finding what they excel at.

There was a time, back in the day, where a lot of people hated Carolina, which was always absolutely baffling to me (especially after the finale of Season 10). I saw a piece of myself in her (in an incredibly dramatized, much higher-stakes way). I didn't know why I was so attached, or how to communicate it; the attacks on her character felt like personal attacks on me. She's doing her best in a completely impossible situation, with the same weaknesses in character that I had, played up for the screen as a tragedy. How could I not empathize with that?

Watching her struggle, find a step forward only to take another step back, learn how to be a better version of herself only to find and fall into the same pitfalls... It was comforting. Some people at the time called it bad writing, to keep falling back on the same flaws that were already addressed, or to keep bringing up the same issues - but to me, that was real. Those things don't go away, we just learn to manage them, and it takes time, and seeing somebody who was as strong as Carolina (and RECOGNIZED as strong) fall to the same traps over and over was comforting. It felt like a hand on my shoulder saying 'you aren't alone'.

Maybe it's crazy, but I genuinely cannot bring myself to watch 'The Final Season', because it feels like saying goodbye - and I think we all know how the Church Family feels about goodbyes. They don't get easier. If I don't watch it, it can't be over. Hell, maybe, in some very slim, distant reality, it isn't, right? But I'm not going to get my hopes up just yet; the thought of disappointment hurts too much.

I'm not going to stay her story is flawless, but in a way, it's the flaws that make it what it is; it's human, and relatable (at least to some of us) in a way that I feel like 'imperfect' stories struggle to be. We want a neat bow on it, but that's just not how life works - and might be why I struggle so bad to move on.

Through this blog, through my connection with this muse, I found my now-husband and my best friend, I've made bonds (and slowly lost them) with people I still consider to be incredible people, and I've found a small foothold for myself in this wild world. My life is far from perfect, but I like to imagine that I managed to carve off a tiny bit of strength to bear it for myself. She became an Aegis, of sorts, from despair; life is rough, but I'm not the only one dealing with it. That's easy to think, on a logical level, but it's so much more difficult to truly connect with.

I've been told a lot that I can be pretty intimidating to talk to; I care passionately about my muse - she means so much to me in a way that's incredibly difficult to put into words, and I just want people to see what I see - so much so that I have a very hard time connecting with people who just cannot understand why somebody would like her (though maybe that's a normal feeling for people with their muses?). I enjoy writing, but I've never considered myself great at it; I just so desperately want to be understood. When I'm having a rough time, processing it through her helps - even if I stray away from characterization briefly to do so (though I do try not to).

Talking about this is hard, you know? Like... I get choked up the more I think about it, and, as it turns out, I still have a hard time processing where it's coming from. I almost want to say I'm mourning, but somehow that doesn't feel quite right. Like I'm... Remembering a close childhood friend that I haven't spoken to in a very long time, maybe? It's a difficult feeling to pin down. It's like there's something distinctly missing, and sometimes coming here brings that feeling out; a deep melancholy, that permeates the air.

As I develop my own skills, socially and emotionally, to navigate my own life, I tend to think back to her - somebody whose skill was never questioned (not really), but who thought her usefulness was the only important thing about herself, who gave everything of herself to a system that just didn't care - or, if nothing else, cared far too late. A character who had support, but failed to identify it, and whose biggest regret was turning her back to it, even if it may not have changed a thing. A character of missed connections and bad priorities, trying so hard just to make everything work - but she wasn't who she needed to be. Not yet.

I hear a lot the phrase 'everything happens for a reason', and honestly? I think it's pretty bullshit. But I do think that everything that's happened, has already happened, and that we're here to make the best of it - wherever the chips may fall. We control what we can, and do our best to work with what we can't.

I like to imagine that's a lesson she's incorporated into herself in time, too - at least a little bit.

I'm not really going anywhere with all this, I'm just... Really feeling that melancholy right about now. It's hard for me to picture that her journey has ended; it's just the starting point of who she's going to be.

[randomgentlefolk]

HEYYYYYY it's me. yk. agua (billingal win)

for the CPC ask bestie westie - 🕵️‍♀️ , 🎸(asking the controversial questions frfr) :3 :3 (eats your blog(

OHOHO You know the good questions, alright XD

🕵 = unpopular opinion?

May I say more than 1?

I haven't seen much people say this so I assume it's an unpopular opinion

1. Leopold still gotta apologize to Jamie, man. I mean, calling him hideous? That's kinda, nah..

Also Gwen's reaction to Jamie being called hideous doesn't really satisfy me. I mean, she knows how it feels to be called smth like that so I expected she would be more defensive to Leopold. Maybe say something like, "Hey, don't say that!"? Or anything similar to that but more softspoken considering her personality.

2. Blaine still owes so many apologies to Lance and Frederick (is this an unpopular opinion?)

Look, don't get me wrong here. I'm glad Blaine is going on a self discovery journey and all, but he could at least bid farewell to his family first. Not to mention, he was supposed to be the king, right? I assume he already study a lot for that so really, he could've taught Frederick a thing or two. I just really want the plaid family (minus Leland) to actually bond together as a healing family, man... Also i feel bad for Isolde, y'know?

3. I'm just gonna rip it off like a bandage, the plaid princes not ruling the kingdom together.

I know, I know, they all have each their own dreams and aspirations. I love that! Really, I do. But damn.. Imagine all of them ruling the kingdom together! That would be so cool?! Like, each of them sharing their own perspective on things. Maybe I'm just desperate for more Plaid Princes content :') Their relationship at the epilogue just kinda dissappoint me, aha..But! At least each of them got their own happy endings, so I'm thankful for that.

🎸 = favorite fan theory?

To be honest this is a hard one...Mostly because I've already forgotten most cpc theories aha. But I do remember one I quite like. The theory that Leland pushed Blaine away at the dungeon because he was momentarily possessed by Leelathae who was angry that Blaine called Gwen ugly. I just think it's neat and pretty sweet.

Also the theory that Nell's parents ate the omniscient clam still makes me giggle to this day. It makes sense but it just kinda sound silly XD

Oh! Oh! The uh, the theory regarding what each of the Plaid princes and Pastel princesses costumes mean! Like the correlations between Frederick and The Little Prince! That is also cool!!

I might reblog with more fan theories if I remember them, but for now this is what I got.

[rimeiii]

WHB Prologue Speculations!

Now that I had the time to actually go through and watch the entire PV in its entirety properly (OP is sitting here with a cough, air quality in her country is so bad lately everyone is getting sick), the theorycrafting part of my brain is on overdrive mode so. I'm just going to ramble. And speculate. Mostly about Minhyeok. Because Minhyeok is amazing I love him holyshit.

Also I wanted to try out S3M3 Chongyue ASMR but he's still getting the final mastery level, so I let the brainworms win out. Maybe I did a little silly and did a character analysis regarding MC + Minhyeok and their potential trauma responses too, idk.

Without further ado...

(Spoilers for the prologue video, proceed with caution!)

1. MC and Minhyeok's trauma responses

I feel like the trauma regarding MC seeing their parents dead in front of them when they got home from school back when they were young is going to crop up eventually. Based on their reluctance to step foot in their house, it's likely they never worked through their trauma properly.

There is an active repression of memories here. The mind, deeming the memory dangerous and mind-breaking if it is to be remembered in its entirety, forcefully pushes it down from MC's conscious memory into their unconscious mind as a self-defense mechanism. Sure, they may not recall it now, but it lies in wait in their unconscious mind as it silently affects MC's behaviours and thought processes.

It will crop up eventually, I think. In what way, however, we may not know. Perhaps MC's reliance on Minhyeok is a subconscious decision to allow themself to be vulnerable and let someone take care of them. Perhaps MC now has a fear of loss, which manifests in their impulsive decision to make a deal with Satan to save Minhyeok, the only person they have left. The association between their house and their parents' deaths is still strong, which plays a part in them not wanting to stay there for long.

As an aside, the MC I'm making as my OCsona for this game is going HARD into this aspect specifically, might share her bio eventually on this blog. After I finish working on my Docsona bio that is aha-

And honestly, I do think he suffers from trauma from the incident, at least a little bit. Not to the extent of MC, whose mind repressed those memories to protect themself, but still a significant amount. He can still function in day-to-day life relatively well, and perhaps his tendency to care and protect MC is due to the fact he doesn't want to see her suffer/sad. MC already has a lot on their plate, no need for anything more.

Their attitudes towards each other can be interpreted to be a reflection of how their trauma affects them. MC acts more or less nonchalant about Minhyeok and his expressions of care at the beginning - it may be because they were watching adult videos when he talked to her, but at the same time it may be because they're already so used to having Minhyeok nag at her it became annoying. Or, they keep him at arm's length despite caring for him, because the trauma of losing their parents makes them hesitant to let him in.

And Minhyeok, who perhaps saw MC becoming distant as something worrying, took it upon himself to make sure they are taken care of. Because he loves them, cherishes them, and doesn't want to lose them to what he assumed was despair. Perhaps, he desperately wants MC to open up to him, and his love for MC makes him willing to wait however long it takes for them to do so. And until then, he'll remain loyal by their side.

As for who killed MC's parents, I'd like to think it's an angel. If MC is a descendant of Solomon, then it would make sense that one of their parents is also a descendant of Solomon, right? And the angels have been killing Solomon's descendants left and right - it's just that they've managed to frame these killings as accidents.

(I should make a oneshot for this.)

Which leads us to...

2. Who is the figure in front of MC in the flashback?

I'm pretty sure it's Minhyeok.

Ever heard of Chekhov's gun? It's basically a concept related to conservation of detail. Specifically, if a detail is mentioned in the storyline, then more often than not it has storyline relevance.

The figure who stepped in front of MC, the mention of a soapy smell intermingling with the scent of blood. And guess who's described to have a smell like soap?

That's right. Minhyeok.

Assuming the figure was Minhyeok, what was he doing that day? The most logical answer, assuming human Minhyeok, is that he was walking with MC back home from school to drop them off, when they came across that gruesome scene. Minhyeok's protective instincts kick in as he shields MC's eyes.

3. And about Minhyeok...

Minhyeok, who slides in front of MC to shield their eyes from the carnage that was their parents' death. Minhyeok, who continues to take care of MC after everything. Minhyeok, who cherishes MC so much from childhood, with a childhood promise of marriage.

Minhyeok, who dies protecting MC from harm, who seems to just know MC is in danger, who so readily sacrifices himself for the MC.

He may be MC's childhood friend, but as it stands, he as a character is still shrouded in mystery to us, the player. As many others have pointed out, his character archetype is MC's protector. He shields them from the trauma, protects her from harm, and takes care of her.

The fact he just stormed into his room to protect MC without hesitation. Was he warned of the danger MC is going to be in? How is his devotion to the MC so strong he's willing to risk his life for them? His love for MC is just that strong, is probably the main reason.

Or perhaps...he isn't completely human after all. Which sets up for angst potential, honestly. But that's speculation for another day.

4. About Minhyeok's story...

We see signs of his revival as Satan whisks MC to Hell, with how Minhyeok's body 'flinches' a little bit. So, it's safe to assume that MC's wish is granted immediately - as Satan had said. Demons don't lie, after all (but I imagine they can perform omissions of truth all the same, so don't trust everything a demon says).

As for what happens to him after the revival, the EN translation is a little bit finicky, but with my (VERY) limited CN/JP knowledge I assume that Minhyeok will wake up at the place right before he went back to his room, without any memory of what had transpired mere moments earlier. So, for all he knows, he was supposed to meet MC back at his room but finds them missing from his room. Assuming time flow on Earth and in Hell is the same, I'd imagine he'd start looking for them.

And that might be what the game meant by Minhyeok's story - what's going on back in the human world on his side specifically.

Without the memory of him protecting MC, it would be hard. I'd imagine the angels or demons getting into contact with him first, and promising to get him over to her. Which is how a Minhyeok romance would likely start...I don't know, though. Pure speculation on my part.

also satan's voice kinda reminds me of sesa from arknights help me