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artyrogue · 3 years

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Blind Date Gaming: Bishoujo Senshi Sailor Moon R

Well today's date was a blast from my past. Remember way back when in yesteryear, before the advent of anime in the west? Probably not? Well hey, let's go back in time to when Sailor Moon was like the only anime being shown on TV. Okay, so yeah, it's really not super-great and all (at least the dub wasn't...), but whatever, it was my jam as a young impressionable lad of...what was I, like 10 or something? I can't remember, but since my old grey brick Game Boy was the cornerstone of my youth, I am a little excited to revisit a merging of two old passions. That's right! We're gonna play some Bishoujo Senshi Sailor Moon R!

It starts with a cutscene, of course. This IS based off an anime, so we gotta get a fill of some anime girls with their obligatory high school problems! Sadly for me, it's all in Japanese, but I can provide some crappy machine translations to no doubt elucidate the action-packed dialogue!

"Today, every one of them..."

Oh. Guess I shouldn't have just kind of took a random screenshot in the middle of nowhere. Well, uhh...I'll ad-lib. Today, everyone is apparently milling about whatever Sailor Moon's hometown was. Serena was being a git and verbally harassing everyone she found on the street. That kind of accurately described the first phase of gameplay in this game: an 'adventure' where you have to talk to the right person, then talk to someone else, etc. until the game decides that surprise! You found the area's boss! (My apologies to the script writers here for my clear bypassing of their hard work.)

why hello there fellow school girl, let us talk about boys and how hard maths are

I get some bad vibes of two sorts: One, adventure games where you just try things randomly until you click the right thing and the game decides to let you progress; and Two, Mario is Missing. An odd marriage, especially considering the random boring mini-games they sprinkle in here and there, like matching cards, guessing if the next card will be higher or lower than the current card, and of course the staple of youth fun, sliding puzzles.

At least Final Fantasy gave you money for completing these dumb things....

Well, luckily the game isn't just mingling. There's a platforming phase where you use magical powers to jump, shoot foes, and do battle with evildoers from the Sailor Moon universe! Though I really don't recall any of these enemies since I never watched this season of the show, so I can't speak to their accuracy to the source material. The platforming is accurate for girls wearing high heels, though. These jumps're so stiff, you can mount 'em on a ladder and do high dives offa them.

I can only assume these are the Japanese temple versions of Jehovah's witnesses

The bosses are unsurprisingly dull! Pretty much the only cool thing about them is their animations, which are alright and fairly fluid. Combat is summed up as ‘spam the attack button and don't even try to dodge, because who cares?’ You have more health than every boss in the game. Which is a good thing, ‘cos it's not like you can actually move around and dodge anything anyway.

Ahh yes, the handstand of dominance. A most impressive display for an inter-dimensional being bent on destruction!

So after thumb-wrestling a boss, you get kicked back into story mode. It shifts the scout you play as, but who cares, they all blabber to randos on the street. Come on, just let me fight things! This sucks! While the best aspect of the street-roaming phase that gets changed up is the road layout, later platforming levels get a little cute with their traps and enemies. Still, though, it's all stupidly easy and kinda boring. Except that one time Sailor Mercury was dodging spike mace balls in a sea of scaffolding. Dang, I liked that episode of the show!

Why can't they ever have spiky cubes? Why always balls? C'mon devs, get creative!

Also, I feel the need to point out that the background artists definitely got paid more than the foreground artists. There is so little effort put into the foreground, you may as well be playing an old Game Boy g...oh. Right.

Mmyep, this sure looks like release material and not placeholders during development.

The story starts getting kooky near the end, at least from what my illiterate self can tell. Your first foes are some David Bowie wannabes. Next, a cloaked fortune teller pops in to ruin your self esteem and flash their $40 glass orb (as they do). Eventually, you meet the REAL enemy pulling the strings. It's...a planet? I think? A planet with a dirt lip and a mohawk. Sure. That's fine, I don't see anything that could go wrong with that.

"...my life is Wiseman. This is my heart." Yeah no, I don't think you should have put 'Organ Donor' on your driver's license then, buddy

"Moon Crystal Power!" The faces are definitely part of the power summoning rite. I get a similar look from my wife when I take the last ice cream bar from the freezer

The ending was lackluster, really. I mean, don't get me wrong, the character portraits were pretty good, but you don't get many more unique ones in the final cutscene. But hey, at least you can use the existing ones to redo some popular internet memes.

Overall, not really that great. It was pretty disappointing, but I mean, that's kind of spot-on for all of my revisits to fond childhood memories. So what I've learned from this date is that holy moly did I have terrible taste as a kid! While my younger self might have sprung for it, I ain't going on a date with this one again. Nopes all around! But at least I found a baller Sprite of Passage from one of the lame mini games! Have it as a reminder to never revisit your childhood. Keep that past rosy!

do you have burials at sea for sailor scouts?

#blinddategaming #gameboy #sailor moon

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inevitably-johnlocked · 4 years

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do u have a fic list of BAMF john getting kidnapped?

Hey Nonny!

Ahh, I’ve quite a few Kidnapping fics!

Kidnapping, Hostage, & Stalking

Kidnapping, Hostage & Stalking Pt. 2

KIDNAPPING, HOSTAGE & STALKING Pt. 3

Booted by Sexxica (E, 1,175 w., 1 Ch. || Trapped, Kidnapping, Handcuffs, Biting Kink, Blow Jobs, Coming in Pants, Tight Spaces, Humour, Smut, 69 Sex Position, BJ’s Through Pants) – John and Sherlock have been kidnapped, handcuffed, and stuffed together in a car boot. How come they can never take these situations seriously? Part 3 of the Tumblr Ficlets Gone Wild

Imminent by LoyalPaddler (K+, 1,187 w., 1 Ch. || Kidnapping, Open Ending) – What did it say about a person if he recognized the feeling of waking up concussed, blindfolded, and handcuffed to a chair? Probably not good, that.

Coming Full Circle by KCS (K+, 2,358 w., 1 Ch. || Alternate TGG, Friendship, Drama, Violence/Death References, Drugging/Poisoning, Kidnapping, BAMF John, Moriarty POV, Introspection) – Moriarty had John for almost six hours between his abduction and the showdown at the pool - more than enough time to implement a Plan B for his escape should Sherlock call his bluff with the fake bomb vest.

The Hours Before Midnight by Lady Sam Mallory (T, 7,773 w., 1 Ch. || TGG Fic, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Torture / John Whump, Kidnapping, Drugging, Alternating POV, Worried / Protective Sherlock) – Moriarty doesn't play fair. John must deal with hours of torment from Moriarty before going to meet Sherlock at the Pool at the end of the Great Game and Sherlock must deal with the consequences of his boredom.

Victim, Bait, Hero, Friend by KimberlyTheOwl (T, 7,887 w., 1 Ch. || Post-TGG Epilogue, Angst, Friendship, Hurt/Comfort, Introspection, Past Kidnapping / Torture / Implied Rape, Panic Attacks, Worried / Possessive Sherlock, Lestrade is a Good Friend) – Some insights into why John was perfectly willing to throw everything away for a chance to kill Moriarty at the pool. Trauma, ugliness, and finally healing. Some nice supporting work by Lestrade as well.

The Five Stages of Mourning, Plus One by SunnyRea (T, 10,557 w., 1 Ch. || MCD, Pining / Grieving Sherlock, URT, Heavy Angst, Sherlock’s Mind Palace, Drug Use, Graphic Death, Depression, Unhappy Ending) – Sherlock did not want this, did not want another stalemate with John in the middle, a gun in Jim's hand. This cannot have happened without a sign. There has to be something he missed anything which said today is the day I kill for real.

The Palmyra Atoll by elwinglyre (E, 16,609 w., 3 Ch. || TSo3 Divergence / Episode Fix-It, Stockholm Syndrome, Kidnapped John Watson, John Whump, Evil Mary, Angst, Cuddling & Snuggling, Toplock, Limited 3rd John POV) – As John's preparing for the wedding, Sherlock is preparing to have his heart broken, and Mary is prepared to do the unthinkable. Intervention required. Enter Sherlock. Set before Sign of Three with a far different outcome. John is drugged, kidnapped, and left on an island, but not just any old island.

Between Friends by SilentAuror (E, 18,036 w., 1 Ch. || Post S3, Alternating POV, Friends to Lovers, John in Denial, Abduction, Awkward Situations / Miscommunications, Porn With Feels, Blowjobs, Pining, Unrequited, Angst With Happy Ending) – Sherlock gets abducted. As John discovers him tied up naked in an empty storage facility and comes to rescue him, Sherlock's body has an unfortunate reaction which triggers a series of events. John is convinced that everything will be fine as long as they never discuss it. Sherlock isn't as sure...

Hellfire by testosterone_tea (E, 28,596 w., 9 Ch. || Fantasy / Magic / Mages / Elementals AU || Mage Sherlock, Elemental John, Developing Relationship, Torture, Powerful / BAMF John, POV Alternating, Dark / Blood Magic, UST, First Kiss) – Sherlock is a Mage that gets involved with a case involving Dark Summoning rituals, leading him to John Watson, a man with Berserker blood. The only thing is, Berserkers have been extinct for centuries. And of course, nothing involving Mycroft and his interfering ways is ever simple. This time, even Sherlock may have bitten off more than he can chew.

Inscrutable to the Last by DiscordantWords (M, 48,842 w., 6 Ch. || Post-TRF, Alternate S3, John’s Blog/S3 is a Story By John, Divorce, Marital Difficulties, John is a Mess, Emotional Reunion, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Grief / Mourning, Pining John, First Kiss, Adorably Clueless Sherlock, Nostalgia, Love Confessions, Eventual Happy Ending) – He wasn't Sherlock, he couldn't work miracles. All he'd ever been able to do was write about them.

The Thing Is by TSylvestris (E, 56,743 w., 21 Ch. || Case Fic, Dev. Rel., Anal/Oral, Blow Jobs, Meddling Mycroft, Drama, Romance, Humour, Casual Encounters, Pining Idiots, Possessive Sherlock, Orgasm Delay, Rough / Alley Sex, Public Sex, John Whump, Drugged John, Emotional Love Making, Awkward Relationship, Marriage of Convenience, Switchlock) – The problem with living with Sherlock, John thought, was that you never, never, ever knew the significance of anything. Like your flatmate's nose buried in your hair. Whilst you're in bed. Part 1 of Nitroglycerine

Hell Sent, Heaven Bound by ConsultingHound (M, 64,381 w, 16 Ch. || Angels / Demons AU || Fallen Angel Sherlock / Angel Cop John, Alternate First Meeting, Slow Burn, Case Fic, John & Lestrade are Friends Before Sherlock, BAMF John, Mind Palace John, Friends to Lovers, John in Denial, Sherlock Picks Out John’s Clothing, Clubbing / Dancing, Mildly Jealous John, Awkwardness, Kidnapping, Sherlock’s Mind Palace, Sacrifice, Worried / Anxious Sherlock, Angst with Happy Ending, Immortal to Mortal) – Ex-War healer and current angelic guard John Watson is not having the best day. He overslept, he’s underpaid, and now there’s someone tagging the Council’s building walls. However things may be about to get interesting: there’s an unusual stranger hanging around (the definition of tall, dark, and handsome), a literal underground cult is brewing, and rumblings are coming from hell. Can he keep his neighbourhood safe, how and why is he being connected to all this, and who the hell is Sherlock Holmes?

Being John Watson-ish by elwinglyre (E, 69,902 w., 17 Ch. || Bodysnatcher AU || Author John, Cranky Sherlock, Angst, Sexual Tension, First Kiss / Time, Falling in Love, BAMF John, Past Soldier John, Feelings, Inside Someone’s Brain, Shy Sherlock, Sherlock Loves John, POV Sherlock, Switchlock, Slow Burn, Internal Dialogue, Mental Turmoil) – When consulting detective Sherlock Holmes steps on one toe too many at a crime scene, he's consigned to a desk job in an archaic office on the seventh-and-a-half floor of the New Scotland Yard. It’s in this bleak office that Sherlock discovers a portal into the mind of renowned author John Watson. Grander than his mind palace, this new wonderland affords Sherlock new vistas of experimentation. To learn more about the mystery behind the portal, Sherlock seeks out and befriends Watson. But then it all goes wrong when others find the secret portal door—including the man whose brain he visits.

Not Broken, Just Bent by Schmiezi (E, 87,585 w., 43 Ch. || Pining, Love Confessions, Rape/Sexual Assault, Torture, Hurt/Comfort, Heavy Angst, Villain!Mary, Suicidal Ideations, Main Character Death, Sherlock First Person POV, Parentlock, Sherlock’s Mind Palace, Grief/Mourning, Emotional Love Making, Possessiveness, Depression, PTSD, Kidnapping, Virgin Sherlock, Eventual Happy Ending) – "For a second, I allow myself to remember teaching John how to waltz. There is a special room in my mind palace for it. A big one, with a proper parquet dance floor. For a second, I go there. I remember holding him, closer than the World Dance Council asks for, excusing it with the fact that we are training for a wedding, not for a competition. For a second, I feel his hand on mine again, smell his sweat, hear the song we used. For a second, I allow myself to love him deeply. For a second, only a second, that love reflects on my face." Fix-it for S3, starting at the end of TSoT. Evil Mary.

The Cost of a Wish by slashscribe (E, 102,493 w., 12 Ch. || xxxHolic Fusion || Spirits / Ghosts and Magic, Love Confessions, Slow Burn, Soul Mates / Fated Lovers, Adventure, Immortal Sherlock, Powerful John, POV John, Frottage, Wish Granting, Angst with Happy Ending, Nightmares) – John has been plagued by a secret his entire life that has made him feel hopeless until he meets a mysterious, seemingly omniscient man named Sherlock Holmes who owns a wish-granting shop. Their meeting sets off a series of inevitable events that will change the course of both of their lives forever.

Two Two One Bravo Baker by abundantlyqueer (E, 114,574 w., 27 Ch. || Military AU || Afghanistan, War Story, Thriller, Switchlock, Rimming, Emotional Lovemaking, Lots of Sex, HJ/BJ’s) – Captain John Watson of 40 Commando, the Royal Marines, is assigned to protect and assist Sherlock Holmes as he investigates what appears to be a simple war atrocity in Afghanistan. An intense attraction ignites between the two men as they uncover a conspiracy that threatens everything they’ve ever known, but Sherlock is as much hunted as hunter, and everyone close to him is in deadly danger. Can he solve the case in time to save himself and John? Part 1 of Two Two One Bravo Baker Universe

A Further Sea by i_ship_an_armada & ShinySherlock (E, 125,492 w., 23 Ch.|| Historical Pirates AU || Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Doctor John / Pirate Captain Sherlock, Sailing, UST / RST, Masturbation, Action / Adventure, Mild Angst & Peril, Romance, Shaving, Molly/Janine, Bottomlock, Past Drug Use, Slow Burn, Mild Violence, Happy Ending) – Here be a tale of adventure for both body and soul, but beware if ye be not of stout heart, for this be piratelock, ya savvy? Luckless ship's surgeon John Watson takes a chance, and finds himself eye to eye with The Ghost, the scourge of the seven seas and a definite thorn in the side of the blaggard, James Moriarty. But when John finds there's more to this most cunning pirate than be meetin' the eye, he has to choose... is it a pirate's life for him?

Free Falling by twistedthicket1 (M, 203,574 w., 38 Ch. || Guardian Angels AU || Guardian Angel John, Fluff and Angst, Humour, Kidlock / Teenlock, Light Mystrade, Passage of Time, Possessive John, Drug Use / Overdose, Victor Trevor, Graphic Bullying, Big Brother Mycroft, Hard Drug Use, Depression, Possessive Sherlock, Possessive John, Panic Attacks, Nightmares/PTSD, Pining, Healing Abilities, Kidnapping, Violence, Torture, Blow Jobs, Virgin John, Emotional Development / Attachment, Mortality, Happy Ending) – All Guardian angels are born with a Chosen human. When this child is born, the angel comes into being to protect and care for them during their life on Earth. For John Watson, all he cares about in the world revolves around his Chosen, Sherlock Holmes. Watching him grow up though, the angel soon learns that God must have had a sense of humour the day he decided to make Sherlock, as trouble seems to follow him like a magnet wherever he goes. John can't decide what's worse, the idea of losing his Chosen one, or the fact that he may be breaking the most taboo law of heaven as he disguises himself as a human to better protect and befriend the beloved detective he's always watched from afar. He was meant to care for him. But what happens when caring evolves into something more? What happens when an emotion an angel is supposed to be incapable of possessing comes to life suddenly and viciously inside John's chest?

#steph replies #johnlock fic recs #kidnapping fics #bamf john #Anonymous #my fic recs #fic rec sunday

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muffintonic · 4 years

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MY CATU LIVEBLOG

I did it for the crossover, so I thought i’d do it for the new movie (Phineas and Ferb the Movie: Candace Against the Universe, for those unaware of the acronym)!

TLDR: 8/10 not canon, but surprisingly good nevertheless.

Good: character interactions, dialogue (hilarious), everyone was involved, nice use of Chekhov's guns, absolutely EPIC background music

Bad: off-model issues, animation kind of flash-esque at times, the color palette was more like MML than PnF (more saturated and oddly shaded with clashing colors), overly long gags/pacing problems, immersion-breaking/stereotypical sound effects sometimes, some OOC

Ahh, i've missed Candace's singing.

WAIT A SECOND, WHY DOES HER CHARACTER MODEL LOOK SO MEATY (her head shape is blobby, too)

Oh my god, the entire Hirano family a minute in....i'm living.

Hmmm, the pyramid sports thing was from "Thanks But No Thanks," which is a Season 4 episode. In that episode, Vanessa is dating Monty, which only happened after "Minor Monogram" in Season 3. We know that Phineas and Ferb the Movie: Across the 2nd Dimension takes place in July after "Candace Loses Her Head" (since Doof's Drill-inator from that episode is scene in ATSD), but also before or around "Great Balls of Water" (since it's July in that episode) and definitely before "This is Your Backstory" (2D!Doof's advice to Doof is referenced)/"Road to Danville" (Phineas' trust gesture is referenced)/"Fly on the Wall" (the summer song gets referenced). LONG STORY SHORT: if ATSD took place in July, when the fridge does CATU take place if we're considering it canon?

Seriously, her off-modelness is super distracting to me. It was fine that she essentially had a triangle silhouette because she also had stick limbs, but giving her realistically meaty limbs makes me question why the rest of her is shaped like that. Bad.

That is some EPIC opening music!

Okay, the weird shading on that clown is also super distracting. PnF's design aesthetic is light and bright....I wonder if the MML people worked on this movie or something (which would also explain Candace's odd meatiness).

Why are all the lines so thick????? It looks like one of those low-budget toonboom or whatever animations Disney posts to YouTube.

Hmmmmm, Doof did the "evenly matched" thing in "Doofapus," too.

OH MY GOD, THE SATURATED COLORS + DARKNESS + THICK LINES ARE SOOOOOOOOO UGLYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY.

Bwahahahahaha, that pause when Candace is like "Actually, yes, WTF is it now?" is hilarious.

I like the detail of how all the kids' bikes are lying there in the driveway.

I would've just grabbed Linda's head and turned it at that point, honestly.

Linda is telling Candace calmly that she's exhausted...WHEN DOES THIS MOVIE TAKE PLACE?!!!!

Candace learns by "Sci-Fi Pie Fly" that she can take a break from busting to the betterment of her mental health sometimes....and that's a Season 3 episode. WHEN. DOES. THIS. MOVIE. TAKE. PLACE.

Ahh, i've missed Baljeet and Buford's banter. #oldmarriedcouple

Phineas is like "Candace wasn't having fun this summer? D:" but, like, if this movie takes place in the middle....they sure as heck didn't acknowledge it for the entire rest of the summer. HRGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH, THIS IS WHY YOU CAN'T JUST RETROACTIVELY INSERT EVENTS IN THE MIDDLE OF A SERIES: WE KNOW HOW THE REST OF THE SUMMER/THEIR LIVES TURNED OUT.

Why is Perry's wrist communicator a square. It's a circle throughout the entire series.

Does Vanessa have a scooter license? Do you need a license to ride a scooter? She was complaining in "Vanessassary Roughness" that she was always riding on the back of Doof's scooter, so I assumed she didn't. We did learn in "Finding Mary McGuffin" that she knows how to drive/has her license in "This is Your Backstory," does that count?

WAIT, WHY IS VANESSA SO PINK???? SHE AND DOOF ARE SUPPOSED TO BE A DIFFERENT SHADE OF WHITE (more coffee-toned) FROM THE FLYNN-FLETCHERS. Goddang, I had always appreciated how even the white characters were all different shades from each other in PnF....what a letdown.

Mmmm, characters either willingly engage in diegetic music in this show ("Where's Pinky?"), or it's just an imagine spot/non-diegetic. "Why do I have a guitar?" is not something that should be said.

Hmmmmmmmm, Candace is faulting the universe.......in ATSD she's talking about the Mysterious Force.....HMMMMMMMMM.....

Sounds like that was what Vanessa used to stop her Evil Busting phase...nice. Also, i'm only ~7 minutes into this movie, but i've spent the last 30 minutes watching it.

Hey, astute observation! That's what I always say: Candace wants to bust her brothers both because their projects can get dangerous ("Happy Birthday Isabella"/"Picture This"/"The Great Indoors"/ATSD/etc), and because she feels overshadowed by them/that they can get away with more than her ("Gi-Ants"/"For Your Ice Only"/"Love at First Byte")!

OH MY GOD, SHE ACTUALLY SAID "...completely overshadowed by Phineas and Ferb?" HOLY VALIDATION BATMAN

Man, i've said it before about Vanessa's deconstruction of Doof's motivations in "Last Day of Summer," but she would make a great therapist or something. I hope she goes into Psychology in the future.

HMmmm, I do kind of wish it was with Stacy that she had this breakthrough with, considering how Stacy's been her best friend since they were 5 years old ("Phineas and Ferb Save Summer")/she's only known Vanessa since "Phineas and Ferb: Summer Belongs to You!" somewhere in June. Like, I get that Vanessa is more in-tune with psychological stuff like this and it makes sense, but i’m just a Stacy fan at heart

Oooh, she's even saying "breakthrough" and "healing!"

UGLY SHADING/SATURATION YET AGAIN (did I mention that the D.E.I. scooter is also the wrong color from how we've seen it before? because it is)

Bwuh, "What Do it Do?" all over again.

Okay, seriously, it looks like the giant thing is floating...where's the shadow under it?? THERE IS NONE.

BRO, THERE HAD BETTER BE MORE STACY IN THIS MOVIE. DON'T TELL ME SHE JUST GETS A CAMEO AT THE BEGINNING.

What did they make her? I want to know!

Ooooh, Candace's hands are way too small in that window shot. The off-modelness is so distracting.

AUGH, PHINEAS HAS A BABY HAND, TOO.

Haha, I love it when debris falls in with Perry when he goes to his lair.

Bwahaha, he's so done with Monogram

They use landlines ("Sipping with the Enemy") and physical files...don't try to tell me that PnF takes place later than 2012 I won't hear it.

NICE FILE PHOTO, CANDY

Wait, they have a whole alert-protocol thing about a host family member getting kidnapped by aliens, but it says to send the assigned agent on the mission??? In "Undercover Carl" and "Bullseye!" Monogram specifically didn't want Perry to get involved (in ATSD Perry was acting on his own), so ????????? Is it because he's their best agent or what?????

Some stuff is missing from Phineas and Ferb's room (on the walls).

GALACTIC WEB???? My first thought was the Galactic Kids Next Door

Haha, oh, these kids. Love little moments like these.

Why do characters always play with a ball when in jail/trapped? 2D!Candace did it in ATSD, too.

Why is that CGI so conspicuous. PnF used CGI sometimes, and it didn't look like butt. We're in 2020, people.

BWAHAHA, Vanessa!!

Ooh, they're bringing back Space Adventure! Now, we know that after "Not Phineas and Ferb" in Season 2 they say they're over it, but also that 9 episodes later in "Nerds of a Feather," Phineas and Ferb go to a convention/dress up from it. WHEN DOES THIS MOVIE TAKE PLACE.

Hmmm, cutaway gags like I remember MML doing...still too Family Guy for my tastes, especially with it being overly long. (I'm also not pleased with how Baljeet's half-lidded eyes goes straight across instead of bending over the curvature of his eye like what PnF usually does....the straight thing is also Family Guy/South Park's style. This does not bode well.)

WHOA, OFF-MODEL BALJEET ALERT!!!!! WHY IS HE SHORTER THAN PHINEAS AND WHY IS HIS ARM BENDING LIKE THAT!!!!

Bruh, Phineas thinking it's dangerous and not asking his friends to go seems OOC. Where was this attitude in "Meapless to Seattle?" In "Night of the Living Pharmacists?" In ANY OTHER dangerous scenario?

I do like how the kids are getting to go with them this time after missing out on ATSD.

NORM?!!!!!!!!!!!

PBBBFFFT, WHY DO YOU THINK GIVING THEM BUFORD WOULD APPEASE THEM

Hey, yeah, they've never made mistakes like this! What's going on?

Okay, seriously, in ATSD and NOTLP the kids don't know who Doof is. WHEN. MOVIE. Also, Doof's lab interior does have the correct items in it, but they're colored + shaded weirdly.

DOOF IS A VIRGO?!! Okay, that tracks with him being incompatible with Sagittarius people from "Love at First Byte."

Mmmm, the animation is definitely more on the "low budget YouTube shorts" level. The way Doof moves....

Yeah, gotta stick to your brand, bwaha!

OKAY, SERIOUSLY, THAT IS NOT THE SAME CHICKEN-REPLACE INATOR FROM "What a Croc!" GET THE GODDANG COLORS RIGHT JEEZ DID THESE PEOPLE NOT LOOK AT A SINGLE MODEL SHEET BEFORE MAKING THIS MOVIE

Bwahahahahahahaha, I missed Buford and Isabella's banter (and Buford is right: they might need a canoe...or maybe that's just my over-preparedness talking)!

Again: "Undercover Carl"/"Bullseye!"

Ah, Buford.

Wait a second, they didn't even have an introduction scene between Doof and the kids like they did in ATSD. *insert thinking emoji here*

Meh, D.E.I.'s been blown up worse before (the "Ask a Foolish Question" time comes to mind)

DOOF YOU ARE THE ADULT SUPERVISION!!!! GAH!!

Wait, what are you talking about Candace? I don't remember a voice automated translator being a thing in the Flynn-Fletcher household. If this is a crack at Alexa/Google Home or whatever, THEY HAVE NEVER BEEN SHOWN TO HAVE ONE OF THOSE IN ALL OF THE EPISODES OF PNF

They could have done a fireman slide, I guess...though maybe the friction would've made that a bad idea.

Okay, is everyone going to get mind-wiped at the end of this or what? Candace didn't even know Vanessa's last name or where she lived in "It's No Picnic," and they definitely didn't seem friendly enough in NOTLP considering all of these interactions. I'm going to count up all the "WHEN MOVIE" comments i've made by the end of this liveblog, and if it's 10+ i'm just going to say the movie is non-canon/just an OVA. I am enjoying it more than the MML crossover so far, so that's good, though.

Haha, oh, Candace. See, this is why she and Stacy are BFFs: same braincell (AKA Stacy's "Elementary My Dear Stacy"/"Put That Putter Away" moments).

OH, CANDACE. XD

OH, SNAP!!!

Ugh, okay, the "WHEN MOVIE" doesn't even matter anymore. Officially non-canon due to irreconcilable timeline a la MML post-2016 reference.

Yay, Isabella showing off her skills again! People tend to forget that she's also smart.

Go, Perry!!

Oh my god, the "unsung hero" being technically sung....good stuff

Oh my god, Perry, nooooo!! Someone save him!

Wait, did Doof purposefully put that platypus-sized spacesuit on the ship for Perry?!! Awwwwwwwww!!

HAHA, BUFORD

Oh my god, Vanessa, noooo!!! D: I bet the pods were sent back to where they came from/Vanessa should've been in the Earth pod.

Goddang, good thing that planet's got breathable air (not that that ever really gets addressed in PnF, haha).

Ah, okay, it took her to the planet the aliens are from. Weird.

Wait, NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO, these aliens are weirdly humanoid!! What!! PnF was so good about that ("Out to Lauch"/"The Chronicles of Meap"/"Escape from Phineas Tower"/"Sci-Fi Pie Fly")!!

So they were sending out pods looking for a leader? Weird. Also, they already had Candace be the leader in "Gi-Ants"/"Unfair Science Fair Redux (Another Story)."

Wait, they're doing show-tunes, and pretty much only people who are Evil in PnF do that ("Phineas and Ferb Save Summer"/"The Klimpaloon Ultimatum"/most of Doof's songs). I bet they're going to sacrifice her because of a prophecy or something.

Okay, -1000 points for the Floss. I hate it so much. You know what you'd be flossing if you did that with real rope? POOP. GROSS. Bring back Baljeet dabbing if you're going to make a reference like that, dabbing is fun.

Okay, this song is officially going on for too long. I know the overly long gag thing is a Family Guy staple, too. U G H, leave that horribleness out of my wholesome cartoons, please. Goddang, the influence was even in WBB's movie, too (Panda's dead pose). The Horribleness Lovers are infiltrating the animation industry. (How do I know about the Horribleness if I don't watch Family Guy/South Park? From people making infoposts about how horrible they are + reading up on their wikias/watching YouTube analyses of them, of course. Knowledge is power, and you must know your enemy.)

Seriously, open the freaking door. All of these overly long gags are not only unfunny, they eat up the runtime. PnF has great pacing where it's not too fast (Wander Over Yonder was sometimes too fast), but spends enough time on the things that need it. Opening a door is not something that needs time, especially when it's following up an overly long song.

I bet they're going to extract the element from her or something.

I'M PARANOID, TOO

Wait, this lady (I didn't catch her name) seems to be their leader?? Is she abdicating?

So the aliens have a gender binary, too? Is that necessary? Would that be necessary?

Hmm, I know that Doof didn't realize how futile rotating the moon was in "The Doof Side of the Moon" and what a boat was in "Are You My Mummy?" but he tends to be smart about intricate science stuff. Like, the problem with his inators (he even says it himself in "Phineas and Ferb Save Summer") is that he executes them poorly, not that he's failing in other aspects. Like, is this is the same scientist that built a Re-Good inator solely from plane parts in "Where's Perry?"

That cutaway was not necessary.

BALJEET, NO. Also, is it in character for him to be so gung-ho about trying out this unprecedented maneuver? I know he does have a wild side, but it's not usually about science things/throwing things that require this much caution to the wind.

Wouldn't they pass out from the G-forces or whatever?

Wait, what was the point of that alien mammoth getting flung? I mean, I figured that was going to happen to their ship by the way it landed on the mushroom.

Haha, oh, Doof.

XDDDD Buford had better save the day, since he's the only one that doesn't register the ominous tone. If he doesn't that'd be such a waste of the gag.

Haha, Buford. Still my favorite kid. :')

Okay, I seriously can't hear anything this alien leader lady says. It's like she's whispering all her lines with a hoarse throat or half-mumbling parts of her sentences or something. I have my volume turned up, and it's not helping.

Gross. WAIT, ISN'T THAT LIKE WHAT THE CITIZENS OF THE CANDY KINGDOM DO FROM ADVENTURE TIME?

Wait, do they have a farming culture? They were doing something in a field right now.

Hmm, yeah, lots of non-humanoid alien species on this planet alone....did they NEED to make the kidnapper ones so humanoid?

Doof, you even said that there was no adult supervision earlier. XD Isabella's definitely more qualified to lead, considering she's a Fireside Girl Troop leader/her vast array of badges compared to Doof absolutely ruining the Tri-State Area in "Phineas and Ferb's Quantum Boogaloo" and not knowing what leadership entails in "The Beak"/"Last Day of Summer."

Haha, yeah, see! Whip out those badges.

HAHAHAHA, Oh, Doof. I can see him facing front in the card's photo, ahhh, frontal Doof.

DOOF!!! XDD

Oh my god, he took her hat. She looks like she's starting to get pissed....you never want to get on Isabella's bad side. XDD (She knows hapkido/jujitsu from NOTLP)

Oh my god, this song is amazing.

See, songs are okay to be long if they're dynamic: lots of movement between locations, varying camera angles, engaging lyrics, moves the plot forward, etc. Now this is PnF!

Baljeet, please. XD

Oh my god, poor Doof. Yowch! I hope his leg's not broken. D: He's certainly dragging it around like it is.

HAHA, I love how he just calmly zaps it!!! Nice (and a good example of the experience thing he was talking about earlier).

That chicken looks uncomfortably realistic for PnF's style (we've seen Agent C in "Traffic Cam Caper" before and a rooster in "Cheer Up Candace").

They got the farmer's hair color wrong. Interesting that they brought him and his wife back, though!

What's with the sudden cartoony sound effects for Doof falling??????? Bad.

Hmm, the audience seems like they're being mind-controlled.

It can't be the first time ever, since she was a star in "Flop Starz"/"Run Away Runway"/"Lights, Candace, Action!"/"Unfair Science Fair Redxux (Another Story)"/"Gi-Ants."

For a hot second I thought she was going to ask Candace to marry her or join her family or something.

I bet Vanessa is going to tame that alien dragon! Also, I hope they realize she's not on earth soon.

I bet the gift they made Candace at the beginning is going to change her mind about living it up on the alien planet.

Oh my GOD, Candace has shown repeatedly that she loves and cares about her little brothers. WELP, GOOD THING THIS MOVIE AIN'T CANON.

Like, seriously, if this movie was canon, there's no way the boys would ever drop the "Candace is unhappy" thing for the rest of the summer.

HAHA, LIKE I SAID: ISABELLA IS TO BE FEARED. XD Also, wasn't it Candace's fault since she sent them away?

"While I love ominous patch-related threats more than anyone--" *AHEM* "Right, apart from Ferb" BOYS, PLEASE. BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

I'm getting flashbacks to Horde Prime inviting Glimmer to dinner. Also, I almost typed "Glitter" instead of Glimmer right now.

I bet she killed her brothers or had them mind-controlled or something.

Ooooooof, that's ominous.

Aw, Baljeet's so interested in joining Buford's gang.

Bwahaha, Doof looks so interested! I bet he's going to remember the stuff they're listing for later or something.

DID MONOGRAM JUST SAY DO NOT ENGAGE THE ALIENS BECAUSE OF AN INTER-GALACTIC TREATY?? IS THAT A LILO AND STITCH REFERENCE???? (probably not, but i've been getting into L&S again lately)

Meh, Buford and Baljeet survived being eaten by the worm from "One Good Turn." Those aliens will be fiiiiiiiiiiiiine. :P

Were those alien prisoners rebels or something? They have a hidden city, but they also seemed too scared to be rebels.

Oh my god, cubism.

Okay, so they're not rebels, per se, but they resist by....hiding and cowering. Sort of?

MMmmmyep, the show tunes tipped me off. So these guys got invaded by another alien species, huh? OOF, cordyceps vibes

So she needs Candace to be food for the spores or something?

Yep, she's using Candace as plant food.

Overly long gag again. :\\\\\\\\

Okay, so she didn't kill/mind-control them, but she did lock them up. I was right!

I don't know how their alien biology works, but humans can't eternally walk. Candace's legs would eventually get tired/become not able to move until the lactic acid she builds up wears off. She could also develop varicose veins or blood clots from all that standing. Bad move, aliens.

Yeah, Candace would never do something like that! Also, see: it was her fault they ended up on the prison shuttle, not Doof or Isabella's.

Bruh, the rest of the earth gang breathes CO2...did your scanners not pick up on that?

Oh my god, Candace, don't reveal information that could get earth invaded.

Wait, how was she keeping the mushroom alive before? Where did it come from?

Also, WHAT ABOUT VANESSA!!! SOMEONE SAVE VANESSA!!!

Wait, why was the alien lady holding onto the smaller alien's long moustache? Is he her pet?? CONFUSION

Ugh, they don't have to make every single thing a gag. PnF knew when to make moments real/dramatic. Grow a spine and live with the weight of emotional tension, movie.

ANOTHER OVERLY LONG GAG? No wonder this movie is so long.

Wait, is Shego the VA for the alien lady? The way she yelled sounded like Marlene, who has Shego's VA. I'm going to look this up later.

BWAHA, Vanessa hears the ominous tone, too!

I don't doubt that Doof will be able to cobble something together to get them back, but that honestly has nothing to do with "adulting" since Phineas and Ferb could probably do the same, and they're kids.

I absolutely love how Buford's still carrying that canoe everywhere.

YES!!! Haha, yes, Doof, Perry is your guardian angel (and emotional support animal). :')

I KNEW Vanessa was going to tame that dragon!!

Yeah, see, she never has that dragon again, so this movie is totally just an OVA.

OH MY GOD, PULLING A Chowder HERE, I SEE! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!

Yeah, you can see how off-model/pink Vanessa is right here where she's standing next to Doof. She's supposed to have his brown-tinged coloring (just look at any other time she’s next to him--”Finding Mary McGuffin”/”Minor Monogram”/NOTLP/”Hail Doofania!”/”A Real Boy”/etc).

Bwahahahaha, chicken selfie

Oh, yeah, that makes sense. What would happen if they killed the chicken? Does it only switch with alive chickens?

BWEHEHEHEHEHE

Though I don't like the particular scare chord they used when Doof holds up the Axe inator--very stereotypical/they could've composed a new version, like how Candace's leitmotif is technically Ring Around the Rosie, but different.

Aww, why not, Vanessa? It's your best bet home! Although, I guess it would be awkward considering Perry's right there....

I need to see a photo of the Lieutenant Baljeet's talking about here, for....reasons.

See, Baljeet's recklessness in this movie seems more like something Buford-i'm going to randomly mess with this ("Fly on the Wall")-Van Stomm would do

In "Nerds of a Feather" Baljeet cosplays as a Space Adventure character, so....

"You made another boat?! What've I been lugging this one around for?!" NICE, BUFORD, BWAHA

Wait, how on earth did that work? Can hunks of metal just allow something to fly like that? I admit to not knowing how planes work, but at least those have, like, engines and whatever.

WAIT A SECOND, I SPY MISHTI IN THAT MCFREAKING STADIUM CROWD!!! WHAT IS SHE DOING THERE!!! SHE'S NOT A NORMAL FILLER BACKGROUND CHARACTER!!

Stacy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I wonder if they meant to put her mom on the bleacher seat behind her, or if it's another Mishti case.

They spelled his name wrong: we saw in "Doof 101" that it's John P. Trystate (the elementary school is named after him)

Beh, nothing bad is ever supposed to happen to Roger, that's the whole point of his character. Bad.

Ah, Bujeet banter.

WHY IS ISABELLA'S ROBOT A CAT THING

They should've made something to kill the mushroom instead.

OH, JEREMY XD Wait, that didn't sound like Mitchel Musso.

Was he just making those weapons because it's his hobby? Stacy did suggest a compound bow as a gift for him in "Vanessassary Roughness," and there's a bow on the counter

Buford and Isabella banter!

I like the detail of Candace's hair being disheveled and her socks drooping after walking all this time

Aww, does she feel guilty? :(

She does. Again, this movie can't be canon, because they don't acknowledge what she's saying for the rest of the summer and this kind of breakdown would definitely leave a mark on her.

AHA, I knew that gift would come into play!

Aww, that's a cute mug! Also, good on Candace for not drinking coffee!

HMMM, OKAY, SO THE SIBLING HUG FROM "Phineas and Ferb Get Busted," WHICH WAS PERRY'S DREAM, IS ON THAT PROJECTION OF THEIR NICE MOMENTS. TOLD YA: NOT CANON.

Haha, nice @ the new gelatin memory. It aligns nicely with the various things Candace has done offscreen that Phineas and Ferb get a kick out of (getting her face caught in the dishwasher, getting tangled in the clothesline, etc)

The exploding thing is technically a step forward, but, again, the real issue is killing that mushroom. Also, are Doof and Co. still stuck??

"Why does that sound like her name?" "I dunno." BOYS

STACY...JEREMY...LARPING.....Aww, don't be ashamed, Jeremy! Candace does Ducky Momo cosplay, and she accepted your dance deficiency in "Nerdy Dancin'!" I have to say, I love it when Stacy and Jeremy are on the same side, since Candace was sidelining Stacy in favor of spending time with Jeremy for a while (to the point where "Canderemy" happened).

Mmm, I notice a trend in cartoons lately about applying psychology to things. Amphibia, SPOP, Steven Universe...it's nice to get kids used to the idea that introspection is healthy.

DID SHE JUST DIE

Okay, did they just...fly from another planet? The gang went beyond light speed to get back home....there's atmosphere issues....they didn't even bother to try and have them salvage the space suits from the inator even though characters in PnF can't survive in space/always have to wear a space suit (Doof even puffed up in "Out to Launch" when he stuck his head outside without a helmet on, and Perry made sure to put a helmet on him when he was going spaceward in "The Doof Side of the Moon")?

Oooh, okay, furthest chicken. Nice.

Aww, the dragon's shielding them! Reminds me of How to Train Your Dragon when Toothless was protecting Hiccup from the flames

WOW, that is an EPIC remix of Perry's theme music!!! Holy crud, there's not as much background music as usual in this movie, but the music that is there goes HARD.

Bwahaha, to quote Maui: "The chicken lives!"

Oh my god, Baljeet really likes petting zoos? Also, I guess the farmer's last name is McDonald??

Beverly Hills + Beverly Hills adjacent...why XD

The chicken still lives!!

Okay, so she's alive.

Ah, so that’s why the mammoth got flung.

Aw, I wish Jeremy and Stacy had had more of an action scene after gearing up.

Okay, see, this lesson she's learned? How if this movie was canon, none of the rest of the summer would have been possible? MMmmmmmmmyeah.

Wait, so the American police are just taking the aliens?? No special forces or anything?? They're ALIENS.

LAWRENCE, DON'T TOUCH THAT!!

OH MY GOSH!!!!!!!!!! I WAS NOT EXPECTING THAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Welp, it took me 5 hours to watch this 1 hr 24 min movie...wowza. I forgot to write it when they occurred, but I didn’t like that the alien lady’s blinking had a sound effect in that one scene or that they used the Wilhelm scream during the final battle. I do wish there’d been more Perry and Doof interactions + some more Stacy, but what we did get was good. There were some pacing problems (too much alien screentime), but the excellent interactions between the PnF gang made up for them. Also, I genuinely laughed at at least two handfuls of moments! Anyway: a good movie!! I'm shocked--i'm so picky, and I haven't liked anything since "Last Day of Summer!" I mean, it's definitely an OVA/not canon, but still!! Solid 8/10.

#phineas and ferb #pnf #pnf spoilers #Candace Against the Universe #CATU spoilers #mine

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blackevermore · 4 years

Text

A Dance Before War

[ Alastor x Ester]

Summary: It’s Niffty’s turn to pick the hotel’s gathering theme. She picks a theme that is dear to her heart but a uncomfortable reminder to Angle and Husk. Charlie is happy to have it and Vaggie is there to aid it. But it’s Alastor’s plus one that is glad to have died before the war reached home. Alastor wants this dance.

Genre: Wholesome

Warning(s): Mentions of war(??)

Word count: 2,199

A/N: I was listening to war music and I got this headcanon that when Al was a live and running his station he was once drafted in to help the radio lines and hated every minute of it. Then I kept repeating dialogue in my head for an hour before I finally sat down and just started typing. Enjoy! [Lol typos and missing words are my super powers!!]

It was Niffty's turn to pick the theme of the hotel’s staff gathering. When the little lady was told this, her eye twinkled in the dim lights, and she set about an endless string of ideas. The idea she had settled on was a rather personal one, one that made Husk down a bottle of booze quicker than anyone has ever seen him do. Angel even tried to opt-out of going, but Charlie insisted everyone show up. The theme was a USO ball that Niffty said she just had to have one last time for old time sake. Charlie and Vaggie didn't know what that meant and neither of them wanted to ask since it made Angle and Husk almost uncomfortable to recall. Without further question and very little resistance with the price of endless booze, everyone was dressed as if they were sending a lover to war or were going to war themselves.

Angle refused to wear a uniform. He couldn't form the words and in bitter frustration left it that he never like the way he looked in them. Thus he wore a dress like Charlie and Vaggie but insisted he has more of a pin-up taste. Husk for once cleaned up very nicely and almost seemed visibly proud to don an American uniform as he mended the bar. This party was also open to the public in hopes that Charlie would find a new resident to promote her dream for the hotel. However, most demons slithered in just for the food and drinks, which left Charlie being somewhat optimistic alone. But tonight it seemed that a lot of demons that lived through the war showed up tonight in their finest attires. Someone bragging about their kills, their ranks, their stories, and some sipping the strongest Husk could find as they spoke of their past life (or what they could remember).

Niffty wore an all-white dress with a large bow wrapped around her waist and one in her hair. Even though she wasn't on the clock or tending to Alastor, she still set about working the drinks and passing them out. Husk told her to lay off the work, but he could tell that when the little woman wasn't moving, she was harvesting something deep inside. With a heavy sigh and a running low buzz, Husk hesitantly asked Niffty if she wanted to dance when he heard a very familiar song start to play from the radio. Niffty sprung to life and accepted and for once Husk cracked a smile knowing that he was doing good to someone very special who was no longer in Niffty's life.

Across the way near the fireplace place, Ester stood staring into the fire lost in her many thoughts. She wasn't too young to remember the ways of war, but she didn't live to see America join in the last battle. She had died two years before then, but her soul lingered for years watching her fellow brothers get drafted away. The young black men of Lousiana who had no idea they were never coming home put on their uniforms and marched away. Ester could still remember how some of them could see her standing by the ports as they loaded onto a boat that would take them up towards the 13. Young men of only 18 who wanted to pray to her, but she told them she was not the loa they prayed to. She was not a loa at all. Those young boys would still whisper words in Creole and Haitian tell her to protect them anyway, and she would say nothing in return. She had heard the goodbyes from fathers, the music and news from the radios, and the cries of mothers as they were told of their army boys. She listened to the song that was playing so many times she knew the words before the speakers could crackle to life.

When Ester was finally pulled down to limbo by the Haitian gods, she had witnessed more broken men marching on to the gates of heaven or hell. So many of them didn't even know they had died in battle. Finally, it was her turn of judgment and as the story goes, she's lived between the living and hell. While living here, Ester was unfortchant to find so many soldiers from both sides weren't as good as they were photographed to be. They had problems before their undoing, and the war was just god's way of finally getting rid of them. Even till this day, you could find two enemies still fighting a war that ended so long ago.

"Pardon me, Mademoiselle." A heavy Cajun accented voice called over Ester's shoulder. The young woman knew it had to be a demon that knew about her wanting a try their luck at talking to her. It happened a lot more now that she and Alastor were publically together. Every little demon tried their hand at trying to soften Ester up to get an inside on how to take down Alastor. Little did they know Ester and her following never took kindly to those that snooped in the dark waters. Ester turned around ready to tell off the demon but stopped short by the red hand that was extended out for her. She followed up the arm and finally landed on a face she loved more than anything. Alastor had joined the fun and wore an American uniform that Ester had seen only once before. She felt almost embarrassed by not recognizing her lover's real voice. But who was to blame her forgetfulness but the demon himself as he always left the white noise of his Transatlantic accent on. "May I ask why a dame like you is all alone away from the party?" Ester gave him her hand, and Alastor kissed it.

Ester grinned and twirled her wrist to grab the string of her wrist fan and flicked it open to fan herself, " I've forgotten how to dance, soldier." Alastor gave her a toothy grin and shook his head before snapping his fingers.

"Well, my dear, you must first wear the appropriate attire." Dark foggy clouds wrapped around Ester and spun her around three times off the ground. Her long Haitian dressed and headscarf was gone and replaced with a fitting black tea dress (30s cut of course) with a thick green waist belt that matched her eyes. Her bun was twisted into tight curls and pinned on the side. All her jewellery and her heels were turned green as well. The rope around her neck and wrist vanished, and for moment Ester could breathe without the tightness. When Alastor's powers were finished with Ester, she was good as new and even more beautiful than he remembered. "There we are."

"I say, Al. You sure know how to treat a broken woman right." Ester still held her fan in her hand as she looked herself over. Alastor chuckled and snapped his fingers for a long mirror to appear from the air so she could get a better look of herself. Ester thanked him and looked towards the mirror. When her eyes saw her reflection, she felt her throat tighten, and her body stiffen. Alastor saw the way her eyes grew wide and his smile did the same. He walked behind her and placed his hand on her shoulder in a comforting manner. In the mirror, they looked alive, as they did many years ago, human. They looked as they did in the photograph that once hung above Alastor's cabin fireplace on Earth. The same one that now hung above Ester's. Ester wanted to say something, but all the words in English and French were caught in the back of her throat. She looked up towards Alastor struck with awe at how different he looked from now, dressed in a green suit instead of red. Brown hair and large brown eyes, fair honey skin a gift from his mother's side. Everything was different, except for his shining smile. His devilish intoxicating smile that once rose the hairs on the back of Ester's neck that now soothed them.

"Why is that a sight I haven't seen in years. I believe we make a fine pair, don't you, dear?" Alastor didn't use his radio voice, nor his transatlantic, he spoke in his native nature. The nature he only allowed his mother and his darling Ester to hear. Ester turned away from the mirror, expecting that the illusion would go away, but it didn't. Somehow someway Alastor cloaked their demon forms.

"I have to agree."

"May I have this dance?"

"You may."

The song had changed from one sad love song Husk waltzed Niffty to, to another. This time it seemed that the public company became distant from the dance floor with melancholy. Alastor took Ester's hand and led her to the centre of the floor. Neither of them paid mind to the wondering eyes that followed them. Nor did they acknowledge Angel's comment about being next with the strawberry pimp.

We'll meet again

Don't know where

Don't know when

But I know we'll meet again some sunny day

Keep smiling through

Just like you always do

"I'm glad we didn't live through the war," Ester mumbled as she leaned against Alastor's chest as they swayed back and forth.

Alastor lightly chuckled and sighed, "Speak for yourself, dear, the action would have been marvellous! The casualties, the fear, the desperation in everyone's life. Ahh yes, just like the depression." Ester said nothing as Alastor had his laugh. She knew deep down he was glad too. Despite his taste in hobbies (and people), Alastor was a man who didn't wish to go to war. He was drafted once before for the first war as a radio transcriber, it put a massive dent in his more favourable pleasures, and he swore he would never do that again. The uniform he wore tonight was his own that he tried to tuck away in his closet. Ester found it one day while cleaning and Alastor told her the horror stories of deaths and Europe. 'I've only been once, but I knew Europe wasn't for me. I'm a man of Louisiana, a man of the swamps. They didn't even have jambalaya! Could you believe it?' He told her by the fire as he drank a stiff whiskey from a bad hunt.

"I'm glad you didn't have to go to war Alastor." Ester pulled away from his chest and looked into his droopy brown eyes. He hummed and spun her around before pulling her back in for another set of steps. "I would have been heartbroken if you never came home."

"More than you did before?" He cooed and dipped her. Ester head shot up, and she rolled her eyes.

"Yes, I wouldn't have been able to take down a whole country like I did those big wigs back home." A weak smile played on Ester's lips, and Alastor licked his and closed his eyes as he enjoyed the music.

"I'm glad as well, mon cher. Besides these uniforms are rather tacky and put a damper on my day." Alastor's laughter brought the mood back up, and Ester couldn't help but join him. Their laughter filled the room and made even more people turn their way. Finally, a swing song came onto the radio; Alastor knew that was the cue he needed to make his baby shine like a star tonight. Soon they were swinging around the room and cleaning out the dance floor to make room for more tricks and dips.

Charlie sat at the bar and was amazed at how comfortable Alastor looked dancing around the room with his girl. She had only heard a few mentions from Alastor how he and his lady would cause trouble on the dance floor, but she never thought she would see it. It was amazing seeing them go and how in love they were. Even in hell love found its way and could turn even the most standoffish person weak in the knees. Vaggie even had to admit it was a sight to see as she nursed a juice in a fancy glass beside her girlfriend.

"Oh! Vaggie look!" Charlie grabbed Vaggie's shoulder and pointed up towards the large picture frame above the fireplace a few feet away from the dancing couple. The flames from the fire made it refective. Charlie could see the spell Alastor had put on himself and Ester in the reflection. Vaggie knotted her brows, unsure what she was looking at until the dots connected. "They're beautiful."

"Yeah....they are," Vaggie smiled sweetly and turned away. Husk huffed behind them as he cleaned a glass. He saw it too and felt his dead cold heart jump a bit. He wondered....but as soon as it was there it was gone. Unknown to Husk, Vaggie had the same thought but shooed it away. Neither of them were going to ask Al to do that for them; it wasn't for them; it was only for Alastor and Ester for the time being. Tonight they were alive. Tonight they were human. Tonight they were dancing before going to war.

#🔻Red Thread🔻#alastor hazbin #self ship #self shipping #self shipping community #s/i x canon #my writing

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hellobrockie · 5 years

Text

Some very long Rambly TROS thoughts

Holy fuck there is so much wrong with this movie.

Let's start at the beginning. Kylo tracks down the wayfinder/holocron crystal thing that will lead him to the sith homeworld. We learn that Palpatine was behind both the Snoke and Vader voices in Kylo’s head-basically the dude has been manipulating him for 30 years. Kylo states very clearly he's gonna kill this motherfucker. This is very in line with the Last Jedi- Kylo wants to destroy everything- the Sith the Jedi the Resistance- because he’s tired of the constant push-pull of rejection and manipulation. BUT THEN HE DOESNT KILL PALPATINE???? At first the film argues that he doesn't kill Palps because Palps promises him the big FINAL ORDER fleet? Okay...but I don’t think Kylo really gives a shit about a big fleet of ships when it's offered by the fucker who has been scrabbling his brains for shits and giggles. Once the ‘Rey Palpatine’ thing comes to light, we are lead to believe Kylo went along with the whole final order plan because he wanted to kill Palpatine together with REY???? Ahh okay?

So now we switch back to Rey. She's basically a jedi, cool. And I guess the Skywalker saber just fixed itself, with literally no scars or anything. A great visual representation about how this film feels about character development that happened in The Last Jedi. So Rey breaks concentration and fails the courses. According to the film, this happens because sheisapalpatine. If you had two brain cells you would realize Rey could be upset for normal reasons ...like that in order to the Resistance to win she’s going to have to put Kylo down like a dog. Its kinda cool that Leia is her teacher (more on that later).

Soo then we spend the next hour on a pointless adventure with the Trio™. Which would be fun, if they were ever established as a Trio. Arguably the real trio might be Rose-Finn-Poe. More on Rose later. Here is a list of incomprehensible things that happen here:

Kylo reforges his mask. Because Reasons? The knights of Ren. Because Reasons?

A handful of force bond scenes. The first one actually isn’t half bad. By wearing the mask, Kylo is rejecting the intimacy inherent to the connection because he is about to defile it. Grabbing Rey’s necklace is a physical and emotional violation. It's the first time he has ever used the connection for personal gain. The other connection scenes mostly just play around with the two of them being able to pass each other stuff. They lack the careful editing of TLJ connection scenes. Disclaimer: I’m a pretty hard core Reylo and these scenes really lacked the magic they previously had.This might be un-purpose Kylo is clearly pretty lost as this point. Dull, lacking in heart like so much of this film.

Kylo becomes a cartoon power ranger villian spouting Palpatine exposition and attempting to create suspense by almost catching the trio a couple times. Some of the dialogue is almost Revenge of the Sith Anakin level awkward. It lacks both the unstable angry energy of FA or the sad tired boi energy of TLJ.

Rey makes force lighting because I guess she was upset and it's a genetic ability now???

Poe gets a female love interest, becuase hes heterosexual. HeTeroSeXUal.

Poe and Finn flirt for a whole hour while Poe checks out some new chick and Finn now has a harem thing kinda.

Poe is now a spice trader. BECAUSE YOU KNOW HE'S THE HAN SOLO OF THE TRILOGY. Let's just forget that TLJ establishes that Poe is his own character, probably loyal to the resistance since birth. His parents are rebellion alumni.

Two death fake outs. I don’t know why they had to give 3PO his memories back. He lost them at the end of the Prequels and R2 loved him anyway. Chewbacca capture was a missed opportunity to get some resolution to him shooting Kylo in the gut.

Hux is the spy. Lovely. He is the ultimate weak bitch. Tbh the most consistent character development. Arguably my favorite detail on the entire film. Perfect execution. Domhnall Gleason is a gift.

Now onto Endor. Endor has so much potential and squanders most of it.

Finn meets other people who left the stormtrooper program. Cool. Weird how it's tied to force sensitivity. I like the idea of the force putting Poe and Finn in the right place at the right time, but I think to imply people’s ability to escape slavery is tied to force sensitivity brings us to the problematic terrority of the sequels. Also the only one who talks to Finn is also black. And Clearly has a romantic vibe. Okay…..

The Rey Palpatine thing is made explicit. Even though anyone will half a brain figured it out 90 minutes ago. More wierd implications…..who would agree to fuck an old man Palpatine? So Rape i guess. Rey’s parents were normal...is this some kinda side material hook to read more about them or some shit??? Kylo refers to Rey’s parents as ‘filthy junk traders’. He's right. THEY SOLD HER INTO FUCKING SLAVERY. However Rey’s parents are good people??? WTF THIS IS THE JEDI COUNCIL ALL OVER AGAIN.

Soo Kylo destroys the wayfinder to force Rey to work with him. Anti-Reylos will often get their panties in a twist about how it’s an ‘abusive relationship’. This is the only scene that really comes off as manipulative- in a way it never did in TLJ. Partly because they play up this idea of power-hungry Kylo (which has little basis in reality. In FA he just wanted to make Snoke his daddy. And TLJ Kylo is just soo fucking lonely) rather than sad boi Kylo trying to hold onto someone. Damn the TLJ throne scene is soo careful with getting that energy right, balancing the heartbreak with a little gaslighting (sorry off topic). Then They Fight. Kylo doesn’t even pull out a saber at first because he literally has no intention of killing her. Rey fights because she's mad. Leia decides to intervene at this time, which is weird because Kylo still has no intention of hurting Rey. Apparently Leia sending Kylo a text is enough to freak him out. THIS WOULD HAVE BEEN THE TIME FOR FLASHBACKS, MAYBE A ‘YOU’RE MY ONLY HOPE’ TO TIE HIM BACK TO HIS NAMESAKE.

Instead Rey gets him in the gut. She then heals him, something that should have been really intimate. This would have been time to kiss him in that wistful ‘ I wanted to know what it would be like before I exile myself forever way’. This is one of the scenes that desperately needed more breathing room AND GIVE KYLO SOME FUCKING DIALOGUE YOU COWARDS. Healing him combined with Leia stuff should have reduced Kylo to a pile of tears. I think he would find it completely overwhelming that someone thinks he is worth it, worth a part of their life source, worth their final breathes.

Oh woah surprise Han Solo. This kinda works for me because unlike robot Leia and fairy godmother Luke, Han looks alive. Plus Han is only a memory so Kylo has to save himself, make his own choice. Aww fuck this got me the closest to tears becuase he looks so fucking sad about the fact that he can’t go home. Damn you Adam Driver and you’re big weepy eyes. His mother is dead and I don’t think he ever truly realized that she wanted him back. I guess with the way things went with Luke, he just assumed he was unwanted. Even now, Han is the only one of the 3 Ben can really imagine taking him back. Who knew Han was such a softie. At the same time there is something so unintentionally sad about the fact that Ben’s whole family can become force ghosts and not a single one gives enough of a shit about him to show up at the turning point of his life.

Also the implication that Ben turns to protect Leia’s lifework is strange. Leia’s legacy is the Rebellion, a democratic senate, a planet wiped off the map, NOT SKYWALKER JEDI #2 JJ!!!!! Ben doesn’t even interact with any of the larger powers at work, he just saves Rey.

Also while Ben’s guilt and shame about killing Han (his true sin) keep him on the dark side, this doesn’t address the 8 million other reasons he left the light. Also why do Leia and Rey never discuss this???? His own fucking family repeatedly rejected him because of his ‘Vadar-ness’ which is ironic considering…….

Then we cut to Rey’s fairy godmother-esque trip to Ahch-To where she arms herself with all of the Skywalker’s personal effects:

Mad that Rian Johnson denied you that ESB fanservice call-back of Luke being able to pull his x-wing out of water?? Don’t worry JJ has got you covered.

Mad that Leia didn’t have lightsaber? Don’t worry JJ has got you covered, Leia was always prepared to be a back up to Luke because she doesn’t have her own perspective or anything or like a whole fucking political system to run. Also she stopped training because apparently completing her journey would end in Ben’s death...ooo SmArT foreshadowing that Rey using her lightsaber will end in one dead Ben boi.

Leia and Luke ALWAYS knew about Rey Palps. Which is funny because they threw their own flesh and blood in the trash because he seemed kinda Vader-y. I guess it's wrong to judge people by their bloodlines unless its your own bloodline. I can’t even.

There is no mention of Ben at all- even though Leia and Luke both died for him and Rey put her whole heart into saving him.

Now to Exeger or whatever again. Almost two hours in and we’re back at the planet we were on in the first 5 minutes.

Spaceship stuff happens. Take out your checklist to get those pilot and ship cameos. Ooo look its The Ghost! OG trilogy pilot! Lando is there! WOOO! Poe’s girlfriend lived somehow!

Ben’s last words are ‘Ow’.

Palps wants Rey to kill him because I guess that will make her evil? Since when does killing people make you evil? I don’t think killing Palps to save the world in the same as ‘striking your enemies down in hatred’ or whatever.

Oh Hey Ben is here. Palps doesn’t care much I guess even though trolling Skywalkers is his whole life’s passion.

Palps drains the life out of Ben/Rey. They don’t die. Ben goes flying into a pit. Rey has to face Palps alone because I guess even though Ben/Rey are stronger together and are cosmically linked the lone jedi thing will happen anyway?? Is feminism about doing everything on your own rather than building meaningful connections with your equal partner. Honestly only Men would think a women has to do everything alone to prove her worth, Rey has been wanting allies and family her whole life LET HER HAVE IT.

Also okay sooo Palps did technically kill Rey’s parents and she had about a whole 5 minutes to think about that. Multiple generations of Ben’s family have been tortured by this guy, so I think it would be rather cathartic to see him play a bigger role in the end of Palp.

Rey enters the Avatar State. Cue more fanservice cameos (I love you Ahsoka, but you said it yourself, you ain’t a jedi). In another backhanded slap to TLJ were back on the TheJediDidNothingWrong line of thinking. Anakin is present ...I wonder if anyone else is interested in talking to him…...

Rey dies. I’m not sure why. Palps legit sucked the life of her and she lived, but the Avatar State killed her.

Ben crawls out of pit. Damn Adam Driver has legs for days. He heals Rey, its kinda sweet but it's also really really weird that he hasn’t said anything. Not saying we need an over the top love declaration but even his emotionally constipated parents managed to get an ‘I love you’ out.

Ben saves Rey. The thing Anakin thought the dark side would give him the power to do. Interesting bookend. Sad that my boy has such low self preservation, he gives her his life without hesitation. Why do we have to die for other people? It’s much harder to have to live for other people. To move and grow beyond the past. To try and be our best everyday, even when its hard. Isn’t that real redemption?

Ben kisses Rey. Awww. Its missing some of the elements of a big romantic drama kiss, which I would be okay with ...if it was followed up with a big romantic kiss with a sunset on a new planet before the credits roll. Alas this does not happen. The audience is somewhat befuddled since their had been almost no dialogue referencing their emotional connections. The ‘no one knows me./I do.’ dialogue from the trailer did not appear in film.

Ben smiles. It has all the boyish charm and innocence Anakin wished he had in the prequels. Aww he really has never kissed anyone. I wonder when the last time he smiled was. HAS THIS MAN EVER HAD A GOOD DAY HIS ENTIRE LIFE. I am emotionally moved until approximately 2 seconds later….

Ben dies. There is no funeral. No mention. Rey doesn’t shed a single tear. This dude literally gave you his life without hesitation. Is Reylo one-sided? Or at least not equally felt? Ow. U The Resistance doesn’t wonder what happened to the Supreme leader. We know at the end of TLJ Luke became a legend, I do not think this happens to Ben.

The Resistance parties. Cue Return of the Jedi film reel. Poe and Finn are heterosexual. No resolution to the stupid ReyFinn force sensitve thing. Two women kiss. It will be cut out of the Chinese release.

Rey buries the lightsabers on Tatooine because you know Luke lived there and Leia once wore a metal bikini there. Rey choose the name Rey Skywalker. Which is interesting because she didn’t get along that well with Luke. She finished her training with Leia Organa Solo, Princess of Alderaan who just happens to have been a result of a sperm donation from Anakin Skywalker. She found a father figure in Han Solo. She loved a guy named Ben Solo. I’m not saying she should name herself Rey Solo, but it certainly is better than Rey Skywalker. I mean it's almost like a person's worth and ability aren’t dependent on either a bloodline or acceptance into the galaxies most powerful family. Rey nobody would have been fine. I’m not going to get into the feminist angle of a self made women tying herself to the legacy of a man. Cue theaterwide groaning.

Twin suns. Cool. I liked them better in The Last Jedi.

Rey has a yellow-ish lightsaber and maybe made out of her staff. Wonder where she got the crystals from and why they didn’t introduce it earlier. Possible implication she's going the way of the ‘grey’ jedi? idk some Jedi have yellow actually. Ahsoka had a yellow one. Not sure since this film is back on the JediwayisBest bullshit.

We see Luke and Leia's force ghosts. Ben’s last word was ‘ow’.

In Summary, some odd implications:

Rey Palpatine is quite possibly the worst idea of all time. Worse than midichlorians. The highest level of fanboy pandering and Rian Johnson erasure. Rey has a lot of very real things to be angry about - her rough childhood, the deaths of her mentors, loving someone as dense as Ben Solo, having to come to terms with the fact that her parents didn’t love her.

Return to prequel-esque thinking on slavery. Apparently it is not that bad if you sell someone as long as you do it with LOVE.

Making Finn force sensitive is not character development. Its just half assed pandering and additional exposition in a film filled with exposition.

There is some truly awful dialogue in this film. Its shot composition and editing is so sloppy compared to FA or TLJ.

The force in balance means killing everyone on the darkside.

Rose is completely sidelined. She is the only Asian character on screen. She is seemingly replaced with a black woman who has a similar background to Finn and is a scavenger like Rey. Yikes. Why does this feel like an anti-interacial relationship thing.

Said Black women Jarrah talks to Lando, another black character in a bizarre dialogue that vaguely implies all black people are related. I might be really misreading this, but its weird. I would have liked her to talk to Rose instead because female solidarity.

FinnPoe is played up a LOT. But we are also repeatedly reminded they are attracted to women. This does not feel like woke Bisexual culture. This is pandering without making a commitment.

Rey’s worth as a character is related to her connection to powerful people in the Star Wars mythos, not her own traits.

Ben’s character resonates really strongly with abuse victims and outsiders. His lack of dialogue strips him of a lot of his agency. His estrangement from his family is not resolved. Vader, who arguably did a lot worse things gets a whole dying monologue and force ghost thing.

Oh hey C3PO said the festival is every 42 year old….OG came out 42 years ago. heh.

In Summary:

Watch the Clone Wars animated series

Fall in love with Ahsoka

Watch Star Wars Rebels or at least all the episodes with Ahsoka and also the series finale, it's got some cool force stuff in it.

Think about the cool force stuff in Star Wars Rebels and the cool force stuff in The Last Jedi. Woah.

Apply all this cool force stuff to your own personal version of the Rise of Skywalker

Wait for clone wars finale Feb 2020

Rinse and Repeat

Peg Kylo Ren

Oscar Isaac is the Captain on the FinnPoe Ship.

The Last Jedi was the Best One. Fight Me.

Find the fanfiction where Rey tells him what a good boi he is which reduces him to a puddle. Find the fanfiction where he cries during sex the first time, the second time, every time. Find the fanfiction where his force ghost gets a hug, where his family welcomes his back.

Read Fanfiction:

https://archiveofourown.org/works/21852886

What I would do instead:

Delete Rey Palpatine

Ditch the mask. You have a fucking Oscar nomiated actor hiding under it.

After the Endor part, have Kylo join either Rey or the Resistance. Personally I think him hitching a ride on the Falcon would have been wonderfully awkward. And maybe give some closure the calling Finn a ‘traitor’ thing. This is fanservice-y, but no more fanservice-y than the rest of the film. And maybe finally answer the question of who does/doesnt know who Kylo Ren is. Would like a verbal declaration that he identifies as Ben Solo or least Ben or something.

Ben can still die I guess but maybe give him some kinda funeral. Or reuse the golden dice symbolism.

Slow everything done. Let the audience feel sad, feel happy. Oh and cut out those fucking death fake outs.

#tros #rambling #reylo #spoilers #rey #Rey of Jakku no last name given #why did i write this #catharthis #ben solo

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solartranslations · 4 years

Text

VF Jolly Chapter 3: Trap

Jolly seems to have returned to his usual self. Fear and the mystery of the ship close in on the heroine…

~*Scene: VF Cabin Deck 3*~

Felicita: *sigh*

Jolly: What are you dissatisfied with…

❤≪Jolly≫ Seems to be plotting

Love: I don’t understand

Place: I’ll do some investigation…

Daily: Didn’t I show consideration in my own way?

Jolly: You’re confused if I’m protective of you for once, but if I treat you as usual then you look dissatisfied

Jolly: You’re so spoiled

Jolly: But you understand the situation we are in now, right?

Jolly: No matter. I am going to take a look outside. You stay here. Do not leave

❤≪Jolly≫ Seems to be plotting

Love: You need to understand out positions

Person: The dead will be a problem

Person: Being stubborn and selfish is in her blood

Felicita: !

Jolly: Lock it behind me. I don’t plan to be gone long but…

Jolly: I’ll seal it from the outside so that only you can open it, in case you need to run

Jolly: Open the door for me when I return

>…Okay…

(+30 Amore)

>I want to go too!

(+15 Amore)

>Don’t leave me alone!

(No Amore)

Jolly: A reasonable answer. I can see that you do understand the situation

Jolly: Well, I’ll bring you some fresh apples if I find any

Jolly: The ones in this room are stale

Jolly: I’ll say it again. You stay here. Do not leave

Felicita: *sigh*

Jolly: Hmph…so you don’t like having to listen to what I say either

Jolly: Then I’ll give you a choice

Jolly: You can either stay here by yourself, or go explore on your own

Jolly: I am tired as well. I would actually like to just rest here

Jolly: Now what will it be?

Felicita: …

Jolly: You’ve decided?

(Skip the next dialogue choice box)

Jolly: The Family doesn’t need someone who can’t solve this situation on their own

Jolly: If you truly think of yourself as the “Executive of the Swords” and not our “Ojou-sama”

Jolly: You will never say that again

Felicita: *blush*

Jolly: In case you have forgotten, I am the advisor of the organization…and I will do anything for the Family

Jolly: And it is said that I am so frightful that most cannot consult me

Jolly: It seems that you understand

(Skip the next dialogue choice box)

❤≪Jolly≫ Seems concerned ❤≪Jolly≫ Seems to be plotting ❤≪Jolly≫ Seems to be mocking

Daily: Good girl

Place: Now I can focus on my investigation

Daily: So troublesome

Person: I’ll convince her…

Daily: Don’t disappoint me

Link: So she wants me to protect her

❤≪Jolly≫ Seems to be plotting

Place: Shouldn’t you be more tired than I am?

Daily: This is for me to decide

>I actually want to go with you

>I know you’ll be fine

Jolly: I know. But you respect my decision, yes?

Jolly: Fel…good girl

Jolly: Are you feeling worried?

Felicita: …

Jolly: …I see…it’s about the tiger. Well I doubt I would be eaten

Felicita: !

Jolly: You think I would lose to an animal?

❤≪Jolly≫ Seems concerned ❤≪Jolly≫ Seems concerned

Person: She’s being oddly obedient

Daily: I won’t push it though

Daily: How cute

Daily: I won’t push it though

Jolly: Now…do as I say

❤≪Jolly≫ Seems concerned

Link: I’ll live up to her trust

Person: …I can see why those three are related

Daily: Now I can focus on my investigation

(*locks)

Fukurota: Hoot

(*pets)

Felicita: *sigh*

>Is everyone…alright…?

>Is waiting really all I can do?

~*Flashback: Felicita's Room*~

Liberta: Ojou, you’re worrying too much!

Nova: Yeah. I’m not so weak that you need to worry about me

Dante: Ojou-san, it’s important that you trust us and focus on what you need to do

~*Flashback: Felicita's Room*~

Debito: If I don’t feel needed, then I don’t want to do anything at all

Pace: You’re so kind, Ojou! If I know you’re waiting, then I’ll finish work fast so I can come home!

Luca: It’s true that knowing someone’s waiting for you can be a form of encouragement during missions

~*Flashback: VF Cabin Deck 3*~

Jolly: You’re confused if I’m protective of you for once, but if I treat you as usual then you look dissatisfied

Jolly: You’re so spoiled

Jolly: But you understand the situation we are in now, right?

~*End Flashback*~

Felicita: !

>…Is he worried that Joshua will attack?

>…Is he worried that the tiger will attack?

~*Flashback: VF Captain’s Cabin*~

Jolly: You may be Mondo’s son, but you are still our enemy

Jolly: Even if I did once know you, I’ll show no mercy

~*Flashback: VF Deck*~

Jolly: ! …Felicita!

Jolly: We’re retreating, come on

~*End Flashback*~

Felicita: !

~*Flashback*~

Jolly: The first is the alchemist who stole the Tarocco…a human

Jolly: Then…the tiger

Jolly: The last is some form of ghost

~*End Flashback*~

>There has to be something I can do!

>If something happens to him, I’ll regret it!

Felicita: …! *leaves*

~*Scene: VF Hallway*~

Felicita: *peeks*

(*creak) Ash: So this is where you were…

Felicita: !?

Felicita: !

Ash: Quiet

❤≪Ash≫ Seems irritated

Place: The others aren’t with her

Link: She’s the key to saving Joshua

Person: It’ll be faster to get the truth out of her

Ash: …You know about the “Wheel of Fortune”, right?

Ash: My friend is looking for the “Wheel of Fortune. What exactly does it do anyway?

Felicita: *glare*

Ash: Looks like you won’t tell me

(*shing) Felicita: Hya!

(*clang)

Ash: Guess it’ll actually be hard to get anything out of you…

>I have things I want to ask you too!

>Don’t think I’ll be beat that easily!

Felicita: *glare*

Ash: …Hah! You want to fight?

Felicita: *glare*

Ash: You’ve got spirit

Ash: The loser does whatever the winner says…that’s how it’ll be, right?

❤≪Ash≫ Seems irritated

Daily: What a pain…I’ll finish this quick

Person: Me lose to her? As if

Person: It’ll be faster to get the truth out of her

Ash: Then…I won’t hold back!

(*crackle) Ash: Haaah!!

Felicita: !

Dodge!

>Hit

(+50 Amore)

>Miss

(-50 Amore)

Felicita: *dodge*

(*shing)

(*whish) Felicita: Hya!

(*whack) Felicita: !

(*slide)

(Skip the next duello box)

Counterattack!

>Hit

(+50 Amore)

>Miss

(-50 Amore)

(*slash)

(*clang) Ash: You really think that would hit me?

(*shing) (*step)

(*whish) Felicita: Hya!

Counterattack!

>Hit

(+50 Amore)

>Miss

(-50 Amore)

(*whack) Ash: Guh…Ahh!

(*block) Ash: A kick like that…wouldn’t do any damage even if it did hit!

Ash: ….There’s no time…this’ll finish it!!

Felicita: !?

Jolly: …Sorry to ruin the fun. Please continue

❤≪Jolly≫ Seems irritated

Daily: Is being stubborn and reckless in her blood?

Person: She seems to be having fun

Person: Is this your answer?

Ash: …I was wondering who it was. You’re that old incompetent alchemist

❤≪Ash≫ Seems irritated

Person: Now the difficult one is here

Daily: Or is this my chance?

Jolly: Hah…!

(*dodge) Ash: That won’t hit me…!!

Jolly: I’ll prove which one of us is really incompetent

Ash: Hah! Sure you will. Don’t cry when you lose!

Jolly: Now, can we call of this little farce?

Felicita: *blush*

Jolly: I see…then

❤≪Jolly≫ Seems to be mocking

Place: If we were at the mansion I’d have countless ways to get him to talk…

Person: What does that face mean?

Jolly: Hmph…what were you doing here with Ojou-sama?

Ash: Well, Strawberry Head was just wandering around. So I was talking to her

❤≪Ash≫ Seems irritated

Person: Strawberry Head comes first

Daily: First I have to bait him

Person: He’s mad…or not?

Jolly: It didn’t look like you were just talking…

Jolly: No matter. I understand that Felicita left the room on her own then

❤≪Jolly≫ Seems to be mocking

Person: I see

Daily: Then I’ll deal with this as I see fit

(*glare) Jolly: Fel, you know what happens now…right?

Felicita: *sigh*

Ash: If you can’t stand not knowing what she’s doing, then maybe be smarter about it

❤≪Ash≫ Seems to be mocking

Person: This old man is annoying

Daily: I won’t lose!

Jolly: Now…I have something else to ask you

Jolly: Why did you go after the Tarocco? The stigmata on your neck…is proof that you formed a contract

Ash: …I have no reason to tell you

Jolly: Yes, you do. Being allowed to contract the Tarocco means that you are recognized as a member of Arcana Famiglia

Ash: Like I care!

Jolly: Then, you’re saying that you didn’t steal the Tarocco?

(*shing) Ash: …Shut up!!!!!

(*dodge) Jolly: You shouldn’t throw a fit, child…

Ash: What!?

(*dodge) Jolly: What else would you call a person who angers from just that, but a child?

(*takes off) Jolly: This is all you know how to do then. Lashing out based on your emotions is not the way of an alchemist

(*whish) Ash: Shut uuup!

(*knocks off)

Jolly: You don’t seem to understand…then I’ll put it differently

(*picks up) Jolly: I am asking you to explain what you gain from contracting the Tarocco

Jolly: Now you understand what I’m asking, right?

Ash: S-s-shut up! …Guh!!!

(*roar!)

Jolly: … “La metamorfosi” (TN: metamorphosis) Incredible. Is he a natural shape shifter? Very interesting

❤≪Jolly≫ Seems to be having fun

Pleasure: Very interesting…

Person: What causes him to transform?

Jolly: Or is it an idiosyncratic reaction…

Jolly: Or perhaps the result of his alchemy

(*growl)

Jolly: The tiger…I see

(*runs)

Jolly: If he’s not a natural shape shifter, then it must be the result of his alchemy research

❤≪Jolly≫ Experiment…

Person: Likely a failed experiment

Daily: So going after you wasn’t for nothing

Jolly: In that case…it’s natural to assume he became like that because of his own experiments

Jolly: And, there seems to be some issue with the transformation. Or else he would stay and attack instead of fleeing

Jolly: *chuckle*…I can’t ignore this. But, I’ll put it off for later

Jolly: Now

❤≪Jolly≫ Seems concerned

Pleasure: How are you going to explain this?

Daily: I’ve achieved my objective

Jolly: Felicita…come here

~*Scene: VF Cabin Deck 3*~

Jolly: Now can you tell me

❤≪Jolly≫ Seems concerned

Daily: Didn’t she understand that I was concerned for her?

Person: …Making that face won’t change anything

???: I can’t see very well here

Jolly: You tread all over my attempt to protect you, and now look what happened?

Jolly: I hope you don’t think I will let this go with a half-hearted explanation

>I don’t want to just be protected

(No Amore)

>I didn’t want to regret it

(+10 Amore)

>I thought you’d be in trouble if you were attacked all at once

(+20 Amore)

Jolly: So, you wanted to protect me?

Jolly: …I see

Jolly: So because you saw me in such a weak state earlier, you feel that you can’t leave me on my own

Jolly: I suppose it’s true that I did not thank you enough for that

Jolly: Hmph…

Jolly: …Did you think I didn’t consider that possibility when I went out?

Felicita: Yeah

Jolly: But I believe I also told you that our priority was you and the Tarocco

Jolly: Do you remember that?

Felicita: …

Jolly: Or was your concern for my safety just that much stronger…

❤≪Jolly≫ Seems concerned ❤≪Jolly≫ Seems concerned ❤≪Jolly≫ Seems concerned

Person: So she’s trying to stick to her principles… but it’s not possible now

Daily: Telling her that is a pain

Link: So she didn’t consider that I might regret it

Person: I suppose one would feel uneasy to be left alone in this situation

Person: Why doesn’t she understand that her own safety comes first

Daily: Did she think I didn’t consider that?

Jolly: Felicita…I don’t have the powers of “Gli Amanti”

❤≪Jolly≫ Seems shocked

Daily: The most important things are you and the Tarocco

Daily: She does not appear to be lying

Link: But you are too focused on me

Jolly: So I can only guess what you’re thinking…

Felicita: ?

Jolly: But even though I have repeatedly stated that our top priority was “your safety and the Tarocco”

Jolly: And although we haven’t been able to find the others, you only say that you are worried about me

Felicita: !

>That…might be true

(+15 Amore)

>When I think about you, Jolly…

(No Amore)

Jolly: …And have you figured out why?

Jolly: When I thought about you, Jolly…

❤≪Jolly≫ Seems to be having fun ❤≪Jolly≫ Seems to be having fun

Daily: She doesn’t have to say it

Daily: She should realize it

Link: But…

Daily: She should realize it

Daily: She acted before thinking, right?

Link: But…

>…I love you…

(+50 Amore)

>…Yeah…

(No Amore)

Jolly: I see…

Jolly: It sounds like you’re saying you can’t think of anything besides me

❤≪Jolly≫ Seems to be having fun ❤≪Jolly≫ Seems to be having fun

Link: ……

???: I can’t see very well here

Link: ……

???: I can’t see very well here

Jolly: You know…what comes next, right?

❤≪Jolly≫ Seems to be having fun

Daily: The reasoning for her behavior hasn’t changed

Person: Why she does such troublesome things for one person

Link: And why she’s been acting like this

Jolly: …*kiss*…Felicita

Jolly: Do you realize how much I’ve been toyed with by you on this ship?

Jolly: It’s true that I treasure you much more than I realized

Jolly: And I’ve realized how confused I’ve been…

Jolly: Felicita……

Jolly: I’ll say it so you don’t need to use the power of “The Lovers”…

Jolly: If…that is what you wish

~*End of Scene*~

Special Voice obtained. It can be heard in the Profile section

(Continue to Jolly Chapter 4)

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#jolly #arcana famiglia #vascello fantasma no majutsushi #chapter 3 #solar translations #psp game #translation #releases #must be some super shiny sunglasses

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makeste · 5 years

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BnHA Chapter 210: Put-Downs, Poltergeists, and Plot Twists

Previously on BnHA: Bakugou’s team defeated class B in record time. Everyone praised them for their flawless performance, and All Might told Bakugou he got chills watching him and Bakugou got super embarrassed and mumbled something and walked off and it was in my Top 10 Cutest BnHA Moments and I love it. Then Deku came along to shower some more praise on him and the two of them went back and forth all “I’m gonna surpass you!” “no, I’m gonna surpass you!” for a little bit and that was really cute as well. Monoma took Tokage’s loss in stride and hashed out a strategy with his team that mostly consists of “take out Deku no matter what.” Deku, meanwhile, was all fired up after his talk with Kacchan, and confidently told his team they would definitely win, and this boy is looking more and more like a hero with each passing day, no joke. Round 5 started up, and All Might got a call from Gran Torino, and then we cut to Tartarus, where the guards were bitching about how dangerous All for One is, and the man in question was sitting in his cell grinning because apparently he can “hear [his] little brother’s voice.” Uh, what the fuck.

Today on BnHA: Gran is all “oh yeah now that you mention it, Nana totally did tell me about some freaky OFA dream bullshit a while back.” Apparently in the dream, a mysterious man shrouded in fog told Nana that it wasn’t “that time. not yet.” Meanwhile Deku full cowls his way through the stage on the lookout for Shinsou. Instead he finds Monoma, who activates his secondary quirk, Antagonize no Jutsu, presumably in hopes of getting Deku to respond so that he can ensnare him with the brainwashing quirk. But Deku is a smart cookie and keeps his mouth shut, even when he hears a scream that sounds like it might have come from Ochako. It didn’t, of course, but in fairness Ochako, Mina, and Mineta are being attacked by Yanagi, Kodai, and Shouda, who have combined their quirks to fling heavy objects at them all. But anyways, so Monoma is all “btw can we talk about how Bakugou destroyed the Symbol of Peace, though,” which, wow, and that does piss Deku off enough to fire an Air Gun attack at him! Or at least that’s what he intends to do. Instead what happens is... well. Something different. Seems like it might finally be That Time, now.

(As always, all comments not marked with an ETA are my mostly-unspoiled reactions from my first readthrough of this chapter. I’m caught up with the manga now at chapter 224, so any ETAs will reflect that.)

so we’re opening with All Might standing off to the side and trying to tell Gran to call him back later because he’s in the middle of class

but Gran is just immediately launching into conversation about how Shimura did in fact once tell him something about “a One for All dream” omg

and All Might is all “and you’re only just telling me this now!?”

and Gran says he didn’t remember until All Might asked him about it

his excuse is that he’s old. whatever, Gran!

“so listen up, but don’t expect much”

listen mister, I’ll expect as much as I damn well please. my plot-spoiled self knows full well that in this case there is a hell of a lot to expect! and I for one am fucking excited about it!

so now we’re cutting back to Team Deku and our boy is sprinting along while the flashback dialogue bubbles recount his strategy

oh shit hold up

...so it occurs to me again that that’s exactly what triggered his first One for All: Avatar State experience to begin with though, way back when. Shinsou brainwashed him and then the Ghosts of One for Alls Past appeared for the first time and activated OFA without him being aware of it -- very much like what happened the night right before this training exercise

and now here he is fresh from that weird dream and possibly about to be brainwashed for a second time. is this really a coincidence? seeing as I’m reading a fucking manga, I’m gonna go ahead and say hell no

shit now I’m even more excited

so Iida is observing that Team Deku’s formation looks similar to Team Bakugou’s, and Sero says that’s not a surprise since they’re similarly balanced. true that

but he’s pointing out that they don’t have a Jirou -- someone who can pinpoint the enemy’s location -- so they need to be more careful

yeah, especially since unlike Team Kacchan, they’re up against Shinsou who can take out their most powerful player in a second if he hits them unawares

anyways don’t mind me I’m just gonna post this part here

so Bakugou watching Deku without that characteristic over-the-top seething rage is still such a novel thing, though. him feeling threatened by Deku’s growth was really the key thing holding that relationship back. now that that’s no longer an issue, he’s observing this match with a surprisingly keen intensity

and what I love about this is that it’s exactly what he said he was gonna do back in chapter 121. he vowed that he would observe and absorb what he sees from others in the same way that Deku does in order to become stronger. he’s watching this match so intently because he wants to learn from Deku. do I even need to say how big of a deal that is and how far he’s come? just, wow

so Deku’s coming to a halt on one of the pipes and he’s silently pointing to something

okay so he’s putting his plan of “I’ll be a decoy” into action

seems like this is his way of compensating for his team not having a Jirou. if they can’t pinpoint class B’s location, they’ll just draw them out instead

now an oil drum is tumbling out from somewhere and it seems like it’s caught his attention

who’s Yanagi. lol I guess we’re about to see, what with the HERE IT COMES

OH SHIT

DEKU IF YOU THINK FOR A SECOND THAT’S HER... COME ON MAN, YOU’RE SMARTER THAN THIS

so he’s turning around and Monoma is there

don’t you dare fucking respond you little green bean. just kick him in the head and knock his ass out. this is a training exercise, you know Ochako’s not at any actual risk. and she can handle herself. these guys are gonna be banking on your heroic instincts in the same way the previous team was counting on Kacchan to be the same self-centered asshole he always was before. you guys are so fucking strong the only way they can beat you is by exploiting your mental weaknesses

oh snap Monoma’s holding up his pocketwatches. way back when his costume was first revealed I speculated that he might use them to time his quirk, so I guess we’ll see if that’s the case? I suppose they could also be support items and have some unexpected tricks to them

anyway he’s talking a lot, as usual

a clever person would also think “I’d better not respond to his baiting here since that’s obviously what he wants”

having said that, Monoma’s not wrong. that would be a good strategy for them to actually have. but I don’t think it’s their real strategy lol

ahh, good, Deku is being clever and cautious and knows better than to respond to him

lol so Deku just go KO him already! why are you keeping your distance?? you once said back at Kamino that you could make it from where you were standing to where Kacchan was in under a second with one leap using OFA. that’s fucking fast. you’re faster than the kid who basically fucking teleported in between Kamakiri and Jirou a couple chapters ago. just zoom over to Monoma and kick him in the head. come on. do it

jesus christ Monoma knows what his strengths are doesn’t he

he knows how to fuck with his opponent, I’ll give him that

so now Deku is finally leaping toward him like I said! about time

not sure if that’s actually the case, but he’s probably not too far off the mark, and I think he’s making the best possible move here given what he knows

uh oh

what is he doing

OH FUCK ME

OH FUCK NO MONOMA. YOU DID NOT JUST

WHAT THE HELL DUDE. IS YOUR SPECIALTY BELOW-THE-BELT ATTACKS OR WHAT?? COME ON OVER AND SAY THAT TO BAKUGOU’S FUCKING FACE WHY DON’T YOU. JESUS CHRIST THAT WAS LOW AS FUCK

and obviously he’s just trying to provoke Deku into responding still! but man, what a way to do it! you’ll resort to anything, huh??

do they have sound on those viewscreens, or just visual? I feel like it’s both, though I’m not gonna stop and go back and check right this second. anyways I’m just wondering if Kacchan heard that, since we know all too well he does feel personally responsible, and now here’s Monoma trying to poke at this recently-healed wound and reopen it again. and Dad Might is probably still on the phone with Gran. damn it Monoma you better not have sent him spiraling again. I will send you the therapy bills

(ETA: so yeah, they absolutely do have audio, it was confirmed in chapter 197. so Kacchan did indeed get to hear that, and everyone else heard it too, and it was probably super awkward, and probably would have been even more so had Deku’s arm not fucking exploded with his goth red vines quirk mere seconds later causing everyone to pretty much forget about anything else.

and by the way, can we just quickly touch on the fact that Hellboy later explains to Deku that “if you wield your power in anger, the power will respond accordingly”? in other words, Monoma pissed him off so much here that he went and activated a quirk he didn’t even know he had and it proceeded to go on a roaring rampage of revenge. so what have we learned today, kids? don’t insult the boyfriend, is what.)

anyway the good thing is Deku’s aiming his air gun at him and still isn’t responding, although he does look fucking furious and no wonder

now we’re cutting back to Team Float/Melt/Stick

and we’re confirming that the “kyaah” was indeed Shinsou which of course it fucking was. Ochako doesn’t KYAA, she ain’t no fucking damsel in distress

lol now I want to see it too

so Ochako’s reminding the others to look at each other’s faces when they talk

what have you been up to Mineta

holy shit a whole fucking lot got stuck to it. what the hell is this anyway

Mina’s protecting them all with a veil of acid, which is fucking badass. Mina I love you

and now we’re cutting to Shouda for a second and he’s watching them and says “they vanished”...?

ah!!!

IS THIS A TELEKINESIS QUIRK!? AT LONG LAST???

HOLY SHIT

THAT’S LIKE FUCKING COMPRESS’S QUIRK. WE’RE GOING FULL ANT-MAN UP IN THIS BITCH. HOLY SHIT CLASS B, IT’S JUST BADASS QUIRKS ALL THE WAY DOWN WITH YOU GUYS HUH

holy shit. I love both of these, but the size quirk especially. that’s so fucking good. I wish she was in class A now, ngl. so many potential applications of this

and how many quirks can Monoma handle at once? he had three pocket watches so I’m gonna go with three. so I’m assuming he took both of theirs along with Shinsou’s, since he was also floating small objects earlier

Ochako’s a good person to have against a quirk like this, though!

and now just smack them away again! take that

NOW WHAT

what the hell

sob omg

I would just like to point out that this was a WAAGH and not a KYAA though. for the record. even when they’re being attacked by rampaging thooming metal objects, class A does not KYAA. we die like men

so here are the deets!

telekinesis quirk confirmed yessssss. this is like a way upgraded version of Inko’s quirk. so glad we finally get to see a hero do this shit too

Kodai’s quirk is so badass and I love it. though it’s too bad she can’t shrink people too. lots of hijinks potential there. ah well

and Shouda’s quirk too!

ngl, I read this and I was like ‘what.’ I had to reread it several times and then go look him up in the wiki just to make sure I got it. this is one of those cases where a “for example” would have really come in handy. but anyways I think what this means is if someone hit a baseball, then he could recreate that impact in the same spot a second time, and not only that but the second impact would be stronger by several orders of magnitude. idk it’s weird and confusing

(ETA: seeing it in action later helped me understand the concept better, but I still for the life of me can’t explain it in words lol. super cool quirk though.)

anyway so even though all this crazy stuff is going on, neither team has actually come face to face with the other yet and they’re all still attacking each other from a distance, except for Deku and Monoma. so now Ochako’s wondering what happened to Deku

and now back to All Might! damn, Horikoshi, you sure know how to cut away from something just when it was getting good

so Gran says it’s probably not what All Might was looking for, but right around when Shimura first inherited One for All, he and her had a casual conversation whilst on patrol

NO, DEKU!!

WHY DID YOU OPEN YOUR MOUTH DAMMIT

WHAT’S GOING ON OH MY GOD. ALL OF A SUDDEN ALL OF MY FAVES LOOK SHOCKED

oh I know this. “plaaaaay the best song in the world. or I’ll eat your souls.” so we played the first thing that came to our heads and it just so happened to be the best song in the world. it was the best song in the world

lol okay so let’s see why they all seem so shocked. IS IT THE SPOILER!?!?

IT’S NOT? OKAY? WHO ARE YOU??

(ETA: this is just the continuation of Gran’s story from the previous page, doy.)

WHAT THE FUCK

okay then! lol. well that explains the “wtf” expressions

so what exactly was Deku about to do that OFA took over and was like DEKU NO. were you going to fucking kill Monoma over insulting your boyfriend. is there some reason OFA lost its fucking shit and activated one of his secondary quirks for the very first (or second, I guess) time, right here and right now? or is the “it’s not that time” what the old man said in Shimura’s dream, and now with Deku it finally is that time?

oh my god. even knowing a little about what’s going on, I still really have no clue and I fucking love it. this is insanely cool and tbh the Joint Training arc is like #4 on my list now and will possibly be #3 by the time all is said and done. IMO this twist is cool and unexpected and will make future battles much less boring (because let’s be honest, Deku’s last couple of fights were really not all that dynamic. this is definitely going to help vary things up a bit), and I can’t wait to see how All Might and Kacchan react too omg

just. thumbs up from me

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lesbianminerva · 6 years

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ahh... my old enemy... dialogue...

#turns out not even I know what jake being seductive would sound like #all according to plan #writing talk

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bountifulwitcharchive · 6 years

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Summon: Oh, do I look so old to you? Do I scare you-- Kehehehe.... I am Caster--Please just call me Caster... I will give you console, Master. Likes: I like the way humans smile so genuinely... Ah is that weird? Its hard to have something I can like so specifically for someone like me... Dislikes: Hmm.. Hard, so hard. I suppose I don’t really dislike anything, truthfully. About the Holy Grail: My wish? My wish... A wish... Master such a thing, is not important is it in this war? Then let it not be on my mind, I shall serve you most dutifully. Event: Let us go at once! Look at how much fun its going to be--do not hesitate to call for my company. I will gladly go with you. I must change into a dress for the occasion! Dialogue 1: ---- Dialogue 2: ---- Dialogue 3: ----

Lines for other Servants:

If you have Arturia: How beautiful, it pleases me to be beside such excellence. I am most comforted, together let us empower forth. If you have Arthur: --- If you have A Knight of the Round: ♪♫♬ We are knights of the round table ~ ♪♫♬ We dance whene’er we’re able ~ ♪♫♬ ( Yes she sings this ) If you have Merlin: My other half~! Oh how intimate this battle field will be~ Fufufu~! If you have Nimue: ( Quietly ) I will let no harm come to you. If you have Ushii ( Kashii Eiji ) : Time to show off now that youre here~!!! Please keep your eyes on me~! Yes don’t worry Ill make sure nothing harms you~ Fufu~! If you have Anastasia : My darling, let the cold of your heart be a reminder of the warmth that was lost in your eyes. Your enemies will know, and how they will sing. If you have Waver ( Without Eiji summoned ) : .... ( You hear a soft and somber sigh ) If you have Waver ( With Eiji ) : ---- ( MORE TO COME )

Other :

Level up: Ahh, it is strange not being able to do everything that I can thank you. 1st Ascension: Now that I’ve revealed to you the truth of who I am. Will you still keep me around? 2nd Ascension: I am glad you are certain of my use, I assure you things will go over well Master! 3rd Ascension: My full power could never be utilized as a servant but this is coming together well, thank you. Final Ascension: Thank you. As I am now, I can surely protect you and this precious world you call home.

Bond 1: Do you still see me as him? ( Merlin ) Bond 2: My mother loved me plenty, I cannot say the same for Merlin however.... Bond 3: Come let me read you a story, it will not be of the One True King, I assure you though it is of my favorites. Perhaps I will tell you a whole knew fable of my own. Bond 4: ---- Bond 5: Master, this world that is yours is one I do not entirely belong in. I assure you, as I am now. I will grant my all to you and this world. To my new King of this Future, I will be your Merlyn. I will make sure the world you wish to save and give hope to will reign a time of peace at last. This is the greatest gift I can give to you. Battle Start 1: ~ ♪♫♬ ( Sings a Hymn ) Battle Start 2: Let me show you the magic of my world! Skill 1: ~ ♪♫♬ ( Sings her spell ) Skill 2: ~ ♪♫♬ ( Sings her spell and laughs ) Attack Selected 1: Yes. Attack Selected 2: Fufufu~ Attack Selected 3: Is that so? NP Selected: Allow me to change fate. Attack 1: ~ ♪♫♬ Attack 2: Ah! ( A soft squeak ) Attack 3: * Yawns * Extra Attack : Hmph! Noble Phantasm: ( TEMP ) Rise my new King for the world seeks forth from its heart a Reign most true! ‘ KingMaker ‘ ( NEED AN addional word idk ) Damage from Noble Phantasm: Goodness!! Regular Damage: Aa! Defeated 1: I failed? How? I-- Defeated 2: It seems... Fate never changes... Battle Finish 1: ~ ♪♫♬ ( Finishes the rest of the Hymn ) Battle Finish 2: How splendid!

#long post #＆ ╱ ╱ ╱ ᶜ ʰ ᵃ ᶫ ᵈ ᵉ ᵃ • ᶰᵉᵛᵉʳ ʷᵃᵏᵉ ᵐᵉ ᶠʳᵒᵐ ᵗʰᶦˢ ᵈʳᵉᵃᵐ ☙#＆ ╱ ╱ ╱ ᵒ ᵒ ᶜ • ᵗᵃᵏᵉˢ ᵃ ᶫᵒᶰᵍ ᵈʳᶦᶰᵏ ᵃᶰᵈ ᶜʳʸˢ ☙

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cupcakeshakesnake · 7 years

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Watching The Husbands of River Song for the first time

(When I started writing the post I messed up my typing and the title said “Watchgin the Husnabds of REierv Sogn for the fitrst time”)

-Oh dear, one episode closer to catching up to the show, and one step clser to a yet unknown source of heartbreak.

tf is this flying dish

Wait, they’re celebrating Christmas in 5343?

-Wow Jesus looks like you’ve really outdone yourself

-TARDIS

-TARDEEEEHS

Why is the music all doom-y and scary like this is something bad That is the best note ever

-HEEEEyyyyy it’s the bald guy from the Series 10 trailer!!

-He looks like he’d be a mouse or a hamster if he was an animal

“Is there anything on my head?”

-YES THERE IS

-OH GOSH

IT’S CONTAGIOUS

-I MUST RUN BEFORE RED CHRISTMAS RUDOLPH ANTLERS SPROUT UP ON MY HEAD

-well hello alien santa under the hood

-RIVEEEEEEER

-WTF

-WHAT THE FAAAAAAAAQ

-wait why is she so pissed-- OHHHHHH

-IT’S BEFORE SHE wait hold on a minute

-This is the first time she’s seeing his twelfth incarnation in-show, yes? No?

-*checks Wikipedia* Yes I’m right but...

-I think I’ll have to watch more before jumping to conclusions

-By the way, this.

A time travelling alien as old as time and also a fluffy grinning cat.

-”My husband is dying.” Doctor: wtf is going on am i about to cross my own timestream or what

-”wtf river”

-Ah yes, flurry snow in the middle of a bajillion cogwheels, brilliant intro.

-Oh shit it’s Moffat

-Poor Twelve must be confused so much.

-River looks like she’s faking though. She’s not the kind of person who coos at people like that.

(unfortunately I could not find a stock photo of a cat looking exactly like this. pity.)

-No, seriously. Look at this cate.

-Anyway who the fuck is that guy in that disproportionately large armor, like, where in the actual sarlacc butthole did he come from

-River Song’s Drama has increased by 100!

-uhhh lemme see I think that’s a mix of Megaman, the old Transformers cartoon and ahh what’s that one videogame I swear there are videogames with people wearing hulky armor like that

-DAMN TWELVE DROPPIN IT

-I don’t even

-I don’t even know what I’m watching

-And yet there’s this lingering fear in the back of my mind that’s still scared of the text “Written by Steven Moffat”

-Wait, if she’s talking to the people in the little screens and they react accordingly to her gestures, then it means they’re watching her too, but where’s the camera?

-Doctor: “the fuck”

-”Do you recognize me?” “No” So the Doctor said no because of something unrelated but I swear a part of him just wanted to get back at River

-HE’S WHITE DIAMOND, GEMS HAVE GENDER, WHITE DIAMOND CONFIR-- nevermind wrong show

-”You’re talking about murdering someone!” “No I’m not, I’m actually murdering someone.”

-”Do you know who you remind me of?” “Yes, probably of a chap with a big-” (he means big chin, don’t get any ideas) “My second wife!”

-The dialogue is top notch in this episode

-Oh no, it’s the robot king who doesn’t look like he can eat his enemies very efficiently and his legion of...

...sword-wielding Jawas.

-Heck, they even sound like Jawas.

-what the effing head

-”I wondered why we didn’t share a bathroom”

-Well for me it explains the nonsense body proportions

-”Decision overruled. Recommendation: Chill.”

-I love how the robot suit says “Chill”, it’s just so.. chill. It’s actually chilling out. It’s the chillest robot in robot history.

I have paused at just the right moment

They’re nerding out together

-Aw the Doctor’s laughing

-He’s having so much fun

-”I haven’t laughed in a long, long time.” There. All the more merrier because of that.

-Oh god

-Okay how many people are River Song gonna hang around with in this episode

-”He only has twelve faces” OHHHHH BECAUSE RIVER DOESN’T KNOW THAT THE TIMELORDS GAVE HIM A NEW REGENERATION CYCLE DOES SHE

‘Little do they know the BBC wanted to continue the show for another fifty years.’

-noooo not the bald guy nuuuuu

-What a cynical robot

-DOCTOR JUST TELL HER THAT IT’S YOUR TARDIS

-Poor Doc

-”Oh yeah I’m SURE I’ll get SOOOO surprised”

-”It’s my girl.”

-The sarcasm is strong with this one.

-”Oh it’s BIGGER on the INSIDE how SURPRISING because I’ve NEVER seen one beFORE”

I’M DYING ASDGSDJSA;;

-”Wait, my Tardis had a fridge?”

-Sooooo when River was with Eleven she was the better driver (in terms of comfort; no offense to Eleven’s Timelording skills in general) but now Twelve is probably the calmest drver so far and River’s, well... not so much.

-”Of course I’m NOT getting frustrated by you doing everything wrong and trying to give you instructions because it’s CLEARLY not my Tardis how can you even SUGGEST such a thing”

-”Yes thank you I am a quick learner and NOTHING else, NOTHING like I’ve flown this Tardis countless times before”

-So if the Tardis can’t take off while someone’s both in and out, then this wouldn’t work, huh.

(From one of the Bunny Suicides books)

-”What sort of medical school did you go to?”

-A king does not unnecessarily endanger the lives of his people... Unless he is cross.

-LOGIC

-OH SHIT THAT GUY’S HEAD GOT CHOPPED OFF TOO

-”Death initiated.”

-The fuck kind of Star Wars cantina did they walk into

-”They’re still digesting their mother.”

-”--I will rip you open and devour you--” “It’s my stomach.”

-Even the guy whose wife got eaten by his kids is going ‘wtf’

-The fuck kind of CGI was that

-”This is where genocide comes to kick back and relax.” Oh boy, that’s gonna get on the Doctor’s nerves.

-”Why are you frowning?” “How’d you know?” “It’s audible.”

-”The man who gave me this was the sort of man who’d know exaclty how a long a diary you’re going to need.” “Oh yeah that’s definitely not me”

-I SAW THAT EYEBROW RAISE, RIVER SONG, YOU CHEEKY LITTLE TIME TRAVELLER

-Annnnd River’s supposed to be paid by a Voldemort with a nose.

-WHAT THE FUCK HIS HEAD OPENS UP

-JEEZ!

-YOU HAVE A JAWBREAKER IN YOUR HEAD??!?

-OH MY FUCKING GOD EVERYONE HAS CRACKED UP HEADS

-For some reason, Credits seems to be the common term for whatever currency is used vaguely in scifi universes. They have Credits in Star Wars too!

-Whoever is playing that pale guy is going to have a royally sore throat by the end of the episode.

-”Hail Hydra”

-You should probably just give him the head...

-To be fair you crackhead guys did creep them out

-The thing.

-Did the head just run away or something, why are the Doctor and River so uneasy, do they really just don’t want to witness a brain surgery or am I missing something here

-Dang it Doctor.

-”The skyyyy shall crrrrrack”

-Well the head is there...

-what. the. fuck. is. happening.

-”At last I am whole again” Well I wouldn’t really call it whole if your body’s a robot but...

-Okay.... that happened.

-*hastily muffled Steven Universy screeching*

-SCREW YOU CATFISH BUG MAN

-Why do his eyebrows make a squeak sound

-”A picnic at Asgard...” MARVEL/DOCTOR WHO CROSSOVER CONFI-- nevermind

-jesus christ why is that guy so intent on reading River’s diary out loud

-’The Angels Take Manhattan’ was three seasons ago. And yes, that episode was written by Moffat too.

-”An infinite number of faces” Well, I wouldn’t say it’s infinite per se...

-Besides, if there’s only the head left, wouldn’t that kind of hinder the regeneration, if not stop it altogether?

-Wait, since when was the robot the king and not the head?

-I don’t like the catfish bug guy with the French mustache. In fact, I am liking him less and less by the second.

-WHOA WAIT THAT ROBOT COULD STORE MULTIPLE HEADS IN IT? I THOUGHT IT JUST TOOK ONE OFF AND PUT ON ANOTHER

-Dammit River why would you want to hurt him like that HE IS RIGHT THERE ;_;

-;_;

-*CRYING EMOJI INTENSIFIES*

-”Two hearts, stupid clothes--” Well the latter changed a bit.

-MOFFAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT

-DAMMIT MOFFAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT

-HE IS RIGHT THERE

-DAMMIT MOFFAT

FUCK YOU MOFFAT

-TAKE MY HEART AND RIP IT APART SOME MORE WHY DON’T YOU

-”I’m an archaeologist from the future. I dug you up.”

-DAMN

-”What do you think of my new body” “I’ll let you know, I’ve only seen the face” Okay it’s either me or Moffat that isn’t aware that this is a family show.

-She caught it in her f-cking boobs

-HER BOOBS

-FAMILY SHOW

-”FAMILY SHOW”

-”So, King Hydroflax?” (idk how tf it’s spelled) “I married the diamond!” (”wE ARE THE CRYSTAL--””SHUT UP!!”) “So you say.” “Elizabeth the First.” “Ramone.” “Marilyn Monroe!” “Stephen Fry!” “Cleopatra!” “Same thing!”

-IF YOU HAVEN’T GUESSED ALREADY, I’M DYING

Glowing cables.

-”Crashing spaceships, that’s my job.” I feel like I should write a sentence that rhymes with this, but unfortunately I can’t.

-OH THE TOP PART OF HIS SCREWDRIVER ROTATES

-”I’ve been doing it longer!” “I do it better!” Like how you drive the Tardis, for example. (I can also see the above dialogue used in a very, very, wrong, scenario, but I’ll just keep quiet and hope that it wasn’t Moffat’s intention.)

-river u ok?

-k

Looks like one of those audio equipment machines.

-Reminds me of the ‘Profit’ memes.

-1. Crash ship 2. Look outside 3. FIRE 4. Nope the fuck outta there and travel forward in time 5. ?? 6. Profit

-1. Visit some yet-to-be tour spot 2. Give money to a random guy and tell him to set up a restaurant 3. Travel forward in time 4. ??? 5. Profit

-River why aren’t you closing the Tardis door

-THE GOD DAMN BOT

-Oh look Nardole’s alive too

-”Now that, my dear, is a suit.” Gotta agree.

HOLE-LEE SHEE-EHT

-THAT’S THE SCREWDRIVER FROM ‘SILENCE IN THE LIBRARY’

-THAT WAS SEASON FOUR

-MOFFAT

-YOU’VE CONSTRUCTED A PLOT STRING THAT SPANS FIVE SEASONS YOU BIG ASSHOLE GENIUS SPIDER

(Screencap of webpage http://www.chakoteya.net/DoctorWho/30-9.htm)

-HOLY FLUKES HOW DARE YOU

-”Are you crying?”

-i-- yes yes i am blame moffat not me

-”There are stories about us, you know.” “Oh, I dread to think.” Been looking around AO3, have you River?

-m o f f a t y o u m o t h e r f u c k e r

-asdflsdhglljfhslhHSAHG

-ASJDAFLHGLASDJHGFALSDF

-sglsdhgflWEGyglhsghsgFLH;;1 LDG lJHGJLHAGLJhglhgljhglhHS DFHS5134 GLHFGLSDHFGh 454123gshdHFJHgjGSJDFL

-$^B&C%TB#%*&#BWKUWURH#$VB&*#B*:#V:B&*$&*B#&VBBBEYBYEBYFF

Moffat you deceitful fuck, I won’t trust you until the very end

-But thank you for sparing us from saying goodbye to her face

You forgot to say ‘forever’

-Please just let them stay together happily for those 24 years

HA I spelled it right

-Overall one of the best Christmas specials in my personal opinion, and top-notch acting by Capaldi. Really, top, notch.

#watching for the first time #doctor who #dw series 9 #the husbands of river song #twelfth doctor #river song #peter capaldi #alex kingston #doctor who christmas special #reaction #review #whovian #long post #nardole #moffat #fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck #king hydroflax

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tilly-tali · 7 years

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finished andromeda. i need to chat. hit me up. impressions under the cut.

granted i have never played at release before, i have never encountered so many bugs/glitches in my life. nav points not updating, enemies spawning inside of rocks, un-scanable/non-interactive quest related datapads, and thanks for ruining my movie night group shot peebee! (she was sitting inside of scotty instead of on his lap or beside him - rude!) sometimes even a reload was not enough. luckily the final battle sequence had enough autosave points because that one was the worst.

speaking of last battle, i found it kind of underwhelming/lackluster. maybe it was just the normal setting. but im not usually so good as to need to play hardcore.

as for the ending/overall storyline, i was slightly disappointed. it just seems kinda small now that its all over. like i understand its probably the first in however-long-new series (though with all the negativity i worry the series is at risk, but i hope not!) and that they need to get things established, but it just didnt have that ‘fullness’ that i felt at the end of the original mass effect. yes they needed to leave some doors open for the future storylines, for the dlc’s we know are coming eventually, but some things seem incomplete in a bad way. i know the epilogue is all ‘we have so much more exploring to do’ but what about the ancient ai - which if you saved is missing from sam node if you leave hyperion and come back to meridian after your interview with keri or whatever else. what about the benefactor and the outlaws/collective? my sense of resolution was not achieved, it doesnt feel complete in the way me1 did, or hell even 2.

other things get a little nitpicky:

we had to select m or f shepard in the cc, but the one time shep is mentioned, its neutral and by title only, so what was the point?

i thought we were supposed to be able to customize ryders quarters on the tempest, did they really just mean the ship collection?

the barrage of new emails everytime you went back to the tempest (though this might be due to the way i played in that i never left a planet until i was basically done with all the available quests at the time) and the fact that there was always a cut scene upon entering it, like sometimes i just wanted to get back on my ship, still docked on eos or whatever and just chat up my squadies, check my email, make some new gear. i didn’t need to lift off for that.

i was also disappointed in the designs of the turians and asari (salarians looked amazing though!). some of the coloring on the krogan or their turian like facial markings was also not cool to me. i also think the additions to sloane kelly were a little too much (though i have yet to assess her since the addition of the new patch to see if she was updated). yeah sure shes a battle hardened outlaw queen and should look distinctive, but the heterochromia, plus the space makeup, plus the tats and extensive scarring was maybe overkill, especially since reyes is so freshfaced and generic in comparison. its kinda bioware’s thing though, put crazy makeup on the bad guys (ie tarohne in da2) but still. suvi’s coloration also grates on my nerves: orange hair, pink lips, red suit? ahh. but i am happy addison looks much better after the patch.

and on the patch subject: the new number key prompts for dialogue choice annoy the shit out of me! i mean yes its nice if thats how you like to pick your choices but the numbering order seems weird to me, the fact that they all say [num] execpt for 6 is just strange. and it looks cluttered, especially if youve played almost the whole game without them. numbering them [1] dialogue choice [2] dialogue choice would be so much better.

one thing i do wish for would be a way to ‘pick’ reyes and the collective without letting the sniper hit sloane. like my ryder wouldn’t have let her die like that but he wouldn’t have left her in power either. i wouldn’t have minded if reyes still ends up killing her at some point in that mission, but just not outright with a cheap shot like the one he took.

i also think the favorites/profiles set up was difficult to set up and maneuver. i never got it figured out (kept deleting my favorites or removing profiles) and so i just used the same setting for the whole game. might have gotten more use out of new fancy powers and combos if i had been able to make it work. being able to control squadmate powers for combos might also have been nice, or atleast know they were using a power so i could plan accordingly. i really felt i was doing all the combat work.

ok so i get that all if the above is on the negative side. but its easier to pick out all the stuff i disliked, but i did like it overall. i will be playing more, just maybe a little less than the original series. i should have made a post closer to the beginning of my playthrough, when all things were new and exciting. things i did like:

general game play worked for me.

2 words: jump jets.

liam kosta is my fave. such a sweetie.

everywhere was pretty.

nomad = mako = happy me.

old game references.

ryder is always cute, twin also cute.

banter and sarcasm.

capt dunn is the coolest lady yo.

final memory unlock blew my mind.

getting to play as your twin for all of 30 seconds.

things i have questions on:

is the nexus uprising book worth a read? does it mention the benefactor and/or the general beginning of the initiative?

jien garson is human and the initiative was her idea, yes? how did the other races get involved, did she invite them, want them to join, or was it solely human based originally? did she bring them in on it just for money to keep it going for humanity, prior to the benefactor stepping in?

where is my twin when i return to visit meridian?!?!?! i left her resting in my quarters on the hyperion to go to the nexus for my final interview with keri (which ps she tells you shes going to go to meridan anyways so like why couldnt she have just arrived and i speak to her there on site instead of flying all the way back to the nexus?) and when i come back again, shes no where to be found?!?! like im glad shes up and out of bed and feeling better, but don’t be going off on crazy missions just yet sis!

#mea spoilers #mea thoughts #long post

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sarahburness · 6 years

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9 Lessons from my 9-Month-Old Nephew, Who’s Taught Me How to Live

“The mediocre teacher tells. The good teacher explains. The superior teacher demonstrates. The great teacher inspires.” ~William Arthur Ward

Oliver.

Ahh, my heart skips a beat at just the sound of his name.

In 2018, a tiny human being arrived on the planet, one who would change my life. In the short nine months my nephew Oliver has been in my life, I’ve learned a lot. I’m not talking about changing nappies and bottle-feeding, although I’m getting to grips with these essentials too. No, Oliver has taught me valuable lessons about life itself. Here are nine of the biggest.

1. Love and be loved.

Those who meet Oli can’t help but love him. He has big, beautiful, blue eyes and a smile that you can’t help but reciprocate.

Although he’s beautiful on the outside, it’s his spirit I love most. He’s gentle, innocent, and curious. I see the good in him, and even though I know he’ll make mistakes as he grows up, I also know it won’t change my unconditional love for him.

Loving Oli in this way has taught me to be more loving and less judgmental of others because I recognize that in every adult there’s an innocent child who’s just trying to do their best.

This has also helped me better open up and receive love. I feel how deeply I want to help Oli, and how much it means to me when I can, which makes me more receptive when others want to help me.

2. Make time to play.

Oliver’s social schedule is impressive, better than most adults! He goes to birthday parties, visits family, has trips out, not to mention the numerous baby classes he attends. Regardless of where he is, whether it’s a class with friends or a rainy day spent at home, I can count on one thing—he’s playing!

One morning, while watching Oli play, I asked myself, “Do I make enough time to play?” Adulting can be a serious matter at times, but that’s not to say we can’t pass time in a way that lights us up. Maybe I’m a little old to play with toy cars (or maybe not). Still, it’s important I make time for fun.

So I now make time to play piano and watch movies instead of telling myself these things are unimportant, and I try to infuse a spirit of play into everything I do instead of taking it all so seriously.

3. Praise ourselves.

Recently, my sister taught Oli the song “If You’re Happy and You Know It Clap Your Hands.” He’s always a little out of time, but he’s mastered clapping itself. It melts my heart to see him clapping away with his mini hands.

I hope when he’s a little older, he’ll clap for himself after all his accomplishments and learn to praise himself for a job well done. Children are usually great at this. Sadly, when we become adults, we become more critical of ourselves, and words of praise become words of criticism. We become our own worst enemies, which makes it hard to ever feel happy, proud, or successful.

I formed a habit at the end of last year, to praise myself for three achievements at the each of day. Big or small, it doesn’t matter. I simply praise myself. I’m a lot less critical of myself since starting this ritual—and a lot happier as a result!

4. Give encouragement.

“C’mon, you can do it.” This seems to be my catchphrase when I’m spending quality time with my nephew. He’s forever on the move, grabbing on to the side of the sofa and pulling himself up slowly.

Rather than helping him directly, I sit back, smile, and encourage because I want to support his growth instead of just doing things for him. f my family are in the room, they’ll join in and it begins to feel like we’re a group of cheerleaders rooting for our favorite sports team.

Oli loves encouragement. Don’t we all? Life can be challenging sometimes, and hearing someone say, “I believe in you” can help us push through when we’re tempted to give up.

I now put more energy into encouraging my loved ones—and myself. Replacing my inner dialogue from negative, doubtful messages to pure encouragement has been life changing. Our thoughts determine our feelings, which influence our actions. For this reason, even a little self-encouragement can dramatically transform our lives.

5. Express how you feel.

Another important lesson Oliver has taught me, and taught me well, is to express how you feel. When Oli is hungry or tired you know about it! He doesn’t hold back. And he always gets his needs met as a result.

For a long time when I was living with anxiety, I wore a mask and hid my real feelings, putting on a “brave face.” I was afraid of being judged and I falsely believed that “real men” shouldn’t show weakness or ask for help.

I’ve gotten better at expressing how I feel, though there’s still room for improvement. As a result, I’m also better able to move past my challenges and get what I need.

6. Be determined.

One of Oliver’s cutest idiosyncrasies is his growl. He’s one determined little man, and his determined actions are always backed by a “GRRRR.” He’s advanced for his age, and I bet it’s because of his determination. If he fails the first time around, he tries again.

As adults, we’re sometimes too quick to form conclusions about what’s possible and what we’re capable of doing. Babies don’t have this kind of internal monologue—they just keep going when they have a goal in their sights!

Watching Oli has inspired me during recent challenges to really dig deep, get determined, and keep on going.

7. Know when to rest.

As playful and determined as he is, Oliver knows when it’s time for a nap.

In the past I’ve been guilty of pushing too hard, working too long, and not resting enough. I sometimes think I’ll get more done if I work harder and longer—probably because I often heard growing up “You can be successful if you work hard.” But I’m actually more effective if I allow myself to stop working and rest when I’m tired, since I can then come back stronger and recharged later or the next day.

I may not require as much sleep as a baby, but I do need to listen to when my mind and body is saying “enough.” It’s not about working harder, but smarter.

8. Try new things.

The last time I saw Oliver, my family and I took him to the English seaside for the first ever time. It was a cold and windy day, but we didn’t let the weather prevent us from having a great time. We walked for hours along the coastline, breathing in the salty sea air and listening to the sound of the waves crashing against the shore.

Having a baby in the family is the perfect reason to go and experience all the world has to offer, to show them its wonders for the first time.

As adults, our lives can get routine. We drive to work the same way, eat the same foods, and see the same people day to day. According to Tony Robbins, one of our six core needs is the need for uncertainty—or variety. Without new experiences, life starts to get boring.

There’s so much joy to be had when we enter the realm of the new with a curious pair of eyes. Trying new things also helps us discover new things about ourselves—new interests or strengths, or traits we didn’t know we had.

After this outing with my family, I made a list of new things I’d like to experience, from foods to devour to countries to explore. I may be far beyond Oil’s age, but we’re never too old to try new things.

9. Live in the present.

Perhaps the biggest lesson my nephew has taught me is to live in the present moment. He has no concept of time. The past and the future don’t exist in Oli’s world; he lives completely in and for the present, which ultimately, is the only time we can ever live in.

Oliver hasn’t yet learned how to remember. He hasn’t learned how to worry. He is pure. Like we all were at one time. If he falls down, he forgets it quickly and goes right back to playing, completely connected to the joy of what he’s doing.

It’s never too late, I believe, to return to living life in the present. Although over the years, thoughts may have pulled our focus like a tug of war rope, back and forth, between the past and future, we can always return to the now, right now.

About Will Aylward

Will helps people around the world to feel more confident, calm, and fulfilled, without them having to fake it. He is the author of Becoming Unstuck: Your Step by Step Guide to Taking Charge of Your Life. Learn more at willaylward.com

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