#Angie: LOVE YOU DUMBASS

[a-dauntless-daffodil]

Charlie: "Vaggie?"

Vaggie: "Yeah, Charlie?"

Charlie: "Holding hands like this is really really nice, as usual, especially after a desperate fight for our lives, so this isn't a complaint or anything-"

Charie: "-but I think your hand... is leaking??"

Vaggie: "That's blood, sweetie."

Niffty: "I like blood!"

Charlie: "That's a LOT of blood?"

Vaggie: "Yeah. It happens when someone impales your hand to the floor with your own spear, and you want the spear back."

Angel Dust: "Only you, Vaggironi."

Charlie: "YOU'RE HOLDING MY HAND WITH THE HAND THAT GOT IMPALED!?"

Vaggie: "It still works. See?"

Charlie: "GaH- don't SQUEEZE IT!!!"

Niffty: (gigling) "Eww~"

Cherri Bomb: "Wow, someone put this girl in a slasher film."

Husk: "Fuck! It fucking squirted all over my fur!"

Angel Dust: "Ooh-"

Husk: "Not one. Shitty. Word."

Charlie: "SHIT!"

Husk: "That one doesn't count."

Charlie: "Fuck, shit- why is it still bleeding? The battle was hours ago! Shouldn't it be closed up by now!?"

Vaggie: "It might not ever, really. Heavenly steel and whatever."

Niffty: (peering through hole in vaggie's hand) "Oooooh~"

Charlie: "But it has to heal! It's- Niffty stop that- it's your HAND!"

Vaggie: "It's still attached so no big deal."

Charlie: "No big- Vaggie, there's a HOLE in you that I could stick my FINGER in!"

Angel Dust: "Just one? Wow, tight fit."

Vaggie: "Could've been worse."

Charlie: "WORSE-!?"

Cherri Bomb: "Angie, if they hear you and you get yourself killed on top of Pentious today, I'm gonna ugly cry and smear my running makeup and snot all over your stupid corpse."

Charlie: "- and you didn't even TELL ME I was putting a death grip on an open wound!"

Angel Dust: "That's so rude."

Vaggie: "The pressure was helping slow the bleeding anyway."

Husk: "Fucks of a feather fuck up together."

Charlie: "BUT IT ALSO HURTS DOSN'T IT?!??"

Angel Dust: "Aww Husky, would ya cry over me too-?"

Vaggie: "It's fine."

Husk: "Fuck you."

Charlie: "This is NOT fine!!"

Vaggie: (smiling at gf) "It doesn't hurt that much, babe, but I can wrap it up if you want."

Charlie: "No, I'll do it."

Charlie: (sighs)

Charlie: "...not like it's the first time I've gotten here too late, and only been able to bandage you up AFTER she's already hurt you..."

Vaggie: "Charlie..."

Charlie: "Nope! No angst right now- bandaging! I'll be gentle, okay?"

Angel Dust: "That's what she s-"

Angel Dust: "-OW CHERRI watch it with the elbows will ya!? That rib's BROKEN!"

Husk: "So's your fucking brain, dumbass."

Cherri Bomb: "He doesn't have one."

Charlie: "Well does anyone have a NON-BLOODSTAINED bit of cloth I can use for-?"

Niffty: (soaked in blood) "No~"

Charlie: "-AGUH NIFFTY! Stop looking through her hole like that!"

Angel Dust: "...."

Cherri Dust: "For the love of yourself, don't."

Angel Dust: "......I've got nothin'."

Husk: "Thank FUCK."

Vaggie: "Hey look, when I flex my hand the stab wound blinks."

Angel Dust: "Wait actually I'm gonna throw up."

Cherri Bomb: "An open bodily hole you DON'T like? Today really is just full of miracles..."

Vaggie: "I can make it talk." (holds up hand to gf) "Hi sweetie."

Charlie: "...."

Vaggie: ".... Sorry. I think I've lost a lot of blood."

Charlie: "Then let me blindfold and or gag your stab wound, before someone faints-"

Angel Dust: (THUD)

Charlie: "-just like that, great."

Cherri Bomb: "HA, oh that's priceless! Another fallen angel!"

Husk: "Why didn't you fucking catch him."

Cherri Bomb: "What am I, his boyfriend? You catch him!"

Husk: "I'm not that loser's boyfriend!"

Charlie: "Yet."

Husk: "THE FUCK YOU SAY??"

Vaggie: "Wait guys, pause the ship war-"

Husk: "FUCK YOU AND YOUR GIRLFRIEND'S SHITTY SHIPPING!"

Vaggie: "GUYS."

Vaggie: "Where's Niffty?"

Everyone: "........."

Everyone: (looks down at angel dust's unconscious body)

Niffty: (Squished) (one arm sticking out) (thumbs up)

[latimeria-fell-from-heaven]

lmao love how we're all just agreeing that the dumbass trio of the astral express are all dumb in their own ways and are laughing at their stupidity, relating to said stupidity, or both.

dan heng is emotionally dumb, this man did not receive the hardware update for emotions. he operates on angy, annoyed soggy cat, and underpaid babysitter for two little hobgoblins. there are simultaneously no thoughts behind his pretty eyes and thoughts of taking a good long power nap after he's done being the older brother of two idiots. he's somehow the resident smart ass, but put him in a romantic situation and suddenly he's dumber than university students procrastinating their final paper to the last day. if he were a cat, he'd be the cat that always has a resting bitch face no matter what you do.

march 7th is the kind of dumb you see in vine (rip) compilations, she'd quote that shit on the regular just to exclusively annoy dan heng. she probably once suggested that whole sit in a chair and hold hands for an hour shit and got put in it the same day. she says dumb shit confidently with shit-eating grins, and if you tell her she's wrong, she'd say "ur mom." she gets bullied by kids, bc of course she does. she would probably learn dumb trivia out of spite so she can look like the sane one in the group. she and the mc have joint custody of the single brain cell that dan heng didn't absorb.

and mc is the stupid little super glue that somehow keeps this group alive and away from mortal peril. they will hide in a hotel closet and yell "OOGA BOOGA BOOGA" at some poor maid trying to do room service. they would enter an eating competition and then barf it all up not even five seconds after they've won the said competition. they are a bastard, a wet cat if you will. they will go through your trash like a little raccoon, they will steal your mail if it's sticking out of the mailbox, they would probably be on the run from the IRS bc they refused to do their tax return.

[nxathyx]

nicknames

Pet names I think bungo stray dogs characters would use for their s/o

Armed Detective Agency

Atsushi Nakajima

°I feel like he'd usually just call you by your name or a nickname

°like if your name is Natalie or Nathaniel definitely would call you Nat or Nath (this is just an example)

°also something simple like "Angel"

°he says you're like a guardian angel and keep him stable

Dazai Osamu

°probably belladona or shorter versions of that like Bella or Dona

°would definitely call you cringe pet names just to laugh about it with you like "hey pookie bear😍😍" (I hate myself)

°maybe an occasional darl or baby

°I feel like he'd call you doll as well (he stole it from Chuuya)

°pretty girl/boy I don't know why

°I don't know I feel like he uses pet names as satire and prefers using your actual name or your nickname

Kunikida Doppo

°this man does not use pet names, like I can't imagine him saying anything

°maybe dear, I don't know what else though

Ranpo Edogawa

°I also don't think he's into pet names

°I don't know like he'd be too lazy to make something up for you

°also just sticks to your name/nickname/Diminutive

°the same as Atsushi except he'd also use "Nathy" (just a random name example)

Tanizaki Junichirou

°BRO HE GIVES ME DISCORD KITTEN VIBES AND I DON'T KNOW WHY...

° "hey kitten😻😻, get on bed wars you're making Daddy angy👿👿

°also uses your name the most probably

°an occasional "lovely"

Yosano Akiko

°probably "love" or a simple "hun"

°either that or your name/nickname

°probably randomly comes up and is like "hey gorgeous/handsome"

Edgar Allan Poe

(putting him here cause I don't know over half of the guild and won't write for them he's also basically an agency member at this point)

°probably darling, dear, sweetheart

°idk he just gives of the vibe

°but I think he'd also prefer just your regular name

Port Mafia

Chuuya Nakahara

°darling

°dear

°baby

°doll

°I don't know why but he'd use Spanish nicknames, like mi amor, mi vida, cariño, mi cielo, mi corazón

°maybe princess/prince

°pretty boy/pretty girl (especially if you're trans and have really bad dysphoria)

°also really like using your name, just plain and simple

°lovely

°my love

°maybe dove

°wifey/hubby

°definetly called you a bitch before

Akutagawa Ryuunoske

°he thinks it's cringe

°once he called you dear and amor (he learnt it from Chuuya)

°just sticks to your full name

Tachihara Michizo

°he gives me "babe" or "bae" vibes and I don't like it 😭

°definetly a "sweetheart" guy

°probably princess/prince as well

Gin Akutagawa

°probably "sweetie"

°other than that I doubt they'd use anything

Higuchi Ichigo

°honey

°your name

°darling

°honey

Koyou Ozaki

°darling/darl

°dear

°honey

°sweetie

*sweetheart

Decay of Angels

Fyodor Dostoyevski

°malyshka

°dear

°doll

°my only one

°he uses those very rarely though and prefers to use your name

Nikolai Gogol

°he calls you something silly

°"hey my gorgeous tampon wrapper"

°like huh😧😧

°uses dove as well

°my free space in bingo 😻😻

°I don't fucking know Bro😭😭

°he probably called you his discord kitten once as a joke In front of Fyodor and Sigma (they're scarred now)

°also the same as ranpo just your name/nickname/Diminutive (prefers nicknames and diminutives)

Sigma

°my love

°darling

°angel

°sweetheart

°just your full name as well

°definetly called you a saint before

Bram Stoker

°I don't think he'd use nicknames

°I don't know Bro is a vampire

°my little vamp vamp🤭🤭

Hunting Dogs

Tetchou Suehiro

°angel

°dear

°sweetie

°he'd definitely call you hubby/wifey

Jouno Saigiku

°bastard

°idiot

°dumbass

°(how romantic)

°I think he'd rather just use your name honestly aquífy

[scoutswritingcorner]

hi!! it’s raccoon anon, i saw your post abt not writing for al as often after i put the ask in 🤦 i apologize and could i instead ask for more huskerdust? maybe some overlord!husk loving on angie and reader (raccoon demon ofc) after a rough day at the casino? (just an idea ofc totally up to you!) :D

Casino Troubles

Overlord HuskerDust x Male!Racoon Demon Reader

A/N: RACOON ANON!! I missed you friend and don’t worry about sending in that Alastor request! I’ll still do it, it’s gonna just take me a little longer than usual! Also I didn’t know if you meant both Husk and Angel were overlords so I went with that but if you want me to rewrite it, don’t be afraid to hit me up! ALSO I HAVE TWO NSFW WORKS FOR OVERLORD HUSKERDUSK IN THE MAKING-

TW: A little angst, cursing, talks about a gun being pointed at you, depictions of violence and gore.

After a horrible day between you and Angel, Husk decides to spoil the shit out of you both.

It had been a rough day for you to start with, this morning when you had woken up to a loud crash as someone made the decision to try and take you out by cutting the elevator cables but severally miscalculated and immediately broke the elevator also while getting shot by Angel’s security when they tried to leave the casino. Now thankfully Angel and Husk were gone to an Overlord meeting that morning but it scared the everloving shit out of you that you had called Husk in a panic. You were stuck in the penthouse for hours (which wasn’t a problem but it still annoyed you to no end.) Then when you had finally made it down into the Casino, just wanting to meet with Husk and Angel outside as they came back from whatever extra business they attended whilst waiting for the elevator to be fixed. But as soon as you did, one of Angel’s newest recruits (or maybe a dumbass who knows) decided you weren’t who you said you were and threw you out on your ass with a pistol to your forehead.  

The hammer cocked back as his finger was tapping on the trigger and you were fully expecting to be shot down. But then Angel’s voice rang out and then the damn fool was on the ground blood seeping from his neck and chest as Angel bends down. “Oh shit- You okay baby? He didn’t rough you up too much did he?” Angel’s voice cracking from how worried he was, “Did he pistol whip you?” He asked, watching as a bruise formed on your cheek and tears formed in your eyes. Angel looked around as two guards strolled out, snapping at them with a venom you only heard behind his closed office door, the venom he saved for his enemies and the occasional idiot who tried to harm you. The guards flinched and quickly dragged the body away as Angel sighed, his hand cupping your face and wiping your tears. “I just wanted to greet you-” You had sobbed out leaning into his hand, “I get fucking jumped in the casino cause they didn’t believe me.” You continued flinching as your head started to throb, you felt pathetic. Angel quickly picked you up storming into the casino, ignoring everybody as he made a beeline towards the elevator. You hid your face into his shoulder the bright lights, smells and sounds of the casino intensifying the headache. 

It was only a few moments but it felt like an hour the whole elevator ride up, he carefully walked to the bedroom and frowned despite how shitty his day turned out especially after hearing what had happened this morning. He knew he had to up his defenses but now he had to comb through everything because his sweet little boyfriend got hurt…almost got killed by an idiot with a fucking gun. He carefully sat you on the bed, watching as your tail curled towards yourself and you didn’t dare remove yourself from his grasp. “I’m sorry, Handsome.” He whispered out, he fully blamed himself.

~~~~

When Husk had gotten the call from Angel Dust about what had happened, the poor tomcat had raised hell. His temper flared so bad he had to make sure he didn’t bring it home with him especially when his two favorite men had a horrible day. So once he took care of his anger he had rushed back home with treats and small gifts, he hummed a soft tune as he snubbed out his cigar in one of the many ashtrays placed around the casino ignoring how some of the patrons ran off at the sight of him and his guards stood taller, seems like the damage had been done and now Angel was on a warpath. Husk couldn’t deny he was too, he would kill every single rat in his own casino if it meant making sure you were safe. Angel could handle himself in a fight just fine but they both worried about you, their sweet boyfriend. 

As soon as the elevators opened with a soft ding he waltzed into the penthouse, everything where it was placed last. A frown tugged at his lips at how quiet it was, he didn’t like it. He placed the treats in the fridge, you could enjoy them later, he waltzed towards the bedroom to see the room was dark as it could be as Angel held you close to his chest, his lower set of arms were rubbing your back carefully. Waltzing closer as he shrugged his suit jacket off and placed it on the armchair in the corner of the room, he noticed how your cheeks were stained with tears. Angel had given him a soft yet strained smile that tore his heart up, “How are you both feeling?” He asked softly not too loud just in case you had fallen asleep. “He’s..been better.” Angel replied hearing your soft snores, “Got roughed up bad, when I got there he..they almost killed him, Husky.” Angel teared up looking away from the feline. “If I hadn’t gotten there in time-” His voice cracked as Husk moved to sit down on the edge of Angel’s side. “But you did, Angel. He’s safe, we are safe.” Husk quickly cut him off and kissed his cheek, wiping any tears from his eyes. “They're dead right?” He hummed watching Angel nod and he let out a breath he didn’t know he’d been holding. “Let’s go take a bath and let me pamper my boys?” He asked purring loudly as Angel flushed the strained smile replaced with a real smile.

Husk moved to lean over towards your sleeping form and pressed gentle kisses to your face being careful not to touch the forming bruise, you whined and slowly opened your eyes, “C’mon pretty boy, can I see your handsome face?” He asked, causing you to chuckle and stretch your back out. “I think he might need some more, Husky~” Angel teased as his hands gently pressed into your sides as Husk easily climbed over Angel to press more kisses onto your face, his tail swaying happily. The fear and anger dissipating easily into laughter as you try to return all the kisses both of them gave you.

[hazshit-hotel-hater]

Cherri Bomb Redesign (Bonus!)

Surprise!! It’s her!

I refuse to believe Cherri doesn’t have bunch of scars or injuries from using explosives and fire all the fucking time. There is no goddamn way. Also shes like running and jumping all over the place constantly she’d definitely have a running blade like 90% of the time. (Don’t walk on running blades you will probably trip) Her pant leg is ripped to look cool and also just for easy access to her leg.

I wanted this to be kind of sloppy with the colours; show how a lot of sinners dont have just a select few sins and note how often people participate in almost all of them. Ik it may not be the most pleasing colour palette to look at but that’s kind of the intention. Jumbled colours and asymmetry is really just Cherri’s thing in my head. I wanted it to look like she made or thrifted her clothes as well or like just stole them.

The bomb and cherry in her hair are supposed to kind of look like those hair bobble things that fucking HURT when you snapped them but they were cute so I feel like utilising hair bobbles is something I need to do much more

You could kill a man with these I swear to god.

Her tattoos and stuff are just basic cherries and vines and the little bomb and the bisexual symbol thing. Also bellybutton piercing is some I’ve only ever done once on an OC I have named Angela/Angie which is… kind of ironic?

You even get a little redraw for funsies! This was done for my friend helping me with my rewrite ideas so this is like the least I can do as repayment. You can see heaven up in the corner too :3

I don’t actually have a bunch to say about Cherri’s redesign, I want her to just be this “Oh wow! Thats definitely an outfit!” kind of design cause I love those. Oh and she definitely did the raccoon tail masking bits with craft tape.

I told my friend the dumbass stick figure on her arm is put there because I was thinking of her asking Angel to draw on her and she’d get it tattooed and he cannot draw at all so he just did a stick figure and was like “this is so cool.” and it was not cool at all/j

I wouldve added more stickers to her running blade and stuff but her colour palette is already VERY full so this is the price to pay. Still not sure if I’ll continue doing these but we shall see!! The next design post is likely going to be the lineup and some side by side comparison things ;P 📺

[rosestarlightkatarina]

Sometimes everyone needs this Angie-translator

Donna: Have a nice day.

Angie: You better hope I’ll never see you again.

Donna: Unfortunately, I can’t agree with you.

Angie: Go fuck yourself.

Donna: How about we meet for some tea this afternoon?

Angie: How about we meet in the basement?

Donna: Don’t worry, I didn’t have a headache last night.

Angie: And here you are again.

Donna to Y/N: I love spending time with you.

Angie: She means she loves your laugh, your smile, your personality, DUMBASS SHE FUCKING LOVES YO..Donna covers her mouth with the hand

[leorawright]

May I request Four Lords reaction on next situation: some idiot starts insulting them, however, before they could do something, their S/O appears right behind this dumbass, put a knife to their throat and ask "excuse me, could you please repeat what you just say?" in eerily friendly way, while smiling as innocently as possible?

Resident Evil!!

The Lord's reaction to their s/o defending them

Alcina Dimitrescu

First of all how did this person mange to say anything insulting to this tall, dangerous, women?

She's charmed by your quick reaction to the person but honestly she couldn't have cared less about what the person had said

She'll ruffle your hair and thank you before moving on

Donna Beneviento

She gets called rude things quite a bit but she hates confrontation so she'll normally just avoid said person

But when you're suddenly there and you forget the offender to apologize she's shocked

No one's ever defended her before (except Angie but Angie's ideas were murderous)

She'll thank you and she has a smile under her veil for the rest of the day

Salvatore Moreau

Poor boi gets bullied quite a lot but normally just takes it because he doesn't know what to do

So when you defend him? He's got starry eyes and he didn't know it was possible to fall more in love with you

You ever get an apology out of the insulter!

Moreau profusely thanks you and honestly you both intimidate him but you're also his favorite person

Karl Heisenberg

Karl doesn't feel like dealing with this person so he just gives them a look and continues

But oh no you're not letting them get off free so easily

Karl is honestly surprised you defended him in the first place and he'd be lying if he said it didn't make his heart beat faster

Afterwards he'll thank you and jokingly call you his knight in shining armor

[geekyarmorel]

RE8 characters reacting to being told "I'm proud of you."

Alcina:

She stopped functioning for a moment.

Did she really just hear that?

She turned and looked at you, asking "What did you just say?"

You're a little hesitant now, worried maybe you had offended her.

"I said that I'm proud of you."

Alcina could feel her eyes burn with tears, she couldn't remember the last time someone told her that.

"You're proud of me?"

"Yes, I am."

She immediately kneels and pulls you into her embrace. 

She tries not to cry as she says "Thank you."

You pull back worried, but she quickly explains that no one has told her that they were proud of her in a long time….if ever.

From then on you promise to make sure she knew how proud you are of her. 

When she has a rough day you remind her all the good things she's been doing and compliment her on it. 

And if you told her what a good girl she was…..well you save that for the bedroom.

Donna:

Much like Alcina she stops functioning, but like 5× worse

She's just standing there, with her arms clasped together at her chest. 

"Donna?......."

When she doesn't respond you immediately yell to Angie.

"Shit! Angie I broke Donna!"

"AGAIN?!?!?!"

Donna seems to snap out of it before asking "You're proud of me?"

"Yes love, you've done so much. Of course I am."

Donna feels tears slip down her cheek before she can help it.

You gently reach out and offer your embrace. You know sometimes she struggles with emotions so you're careful to try not to overwhelm her.

She immediately hugs you, she's quite for a while before whispering low and rough "Thank you."

You kiss her forehead as she pulls back. 

For the rest of the day whether you saw it or not she had a smile on her face.

Heisenberg:

He immediately turns to you with a grin on his face. 

"Fuck yeah you are."

It legitimately made him so happy to hear that. But not that he really tries to show it.

But you know him and you know he's preening on the inside.

The rest of his day he was just a little bit nicer as well.

Now that you've said it he goes (just a little bit) more out of his way to do things that he thinks will make you proud of him.

He will also tell you he's proud of you BUT it's kind of in a gruff way.

"Congrats on figuring it out dumbass, proud of you."

Mother Miranda:

Her hand pauses in the air as she reached for a different page.

Did she really hear that? 

She wanted to snort because of course you would be proud of her. She's practically a goddess, she's perhaps the most powerful being.

"Thank you." She finally settles on, never looking up from her work. "Now if you don't mind I would like to work in peace."

You could feel your face fall, of course she wouldn't really care. Why should she care about something insignificant you said?

"Of course. My apologies." You say as you quickly vacate the lab.

Miranda heard the hurt in your tone but didn't react, attention to focused on the papers in front of her.

As she worked her mind kept drifting back to the conversation. You told her you were proud of her, when was the last time she had heard those words?

She felt her heart softly flutter, this time the words you had spoken soaking into her heart and brain.

Her heart fluttered until she remembered her reaction, then it dropped like a pound of lead. 

She had been callous towards you, that making her groan and pinch the bridge of her nose.

Miranda needed to apologize.

Leaving her work behind she left her lab in search of you.

When she found you she apologized and assured you she would try to work on not being mean while she worked. She cared for you after all.

[moon-is-a-cryptid]

Music Head cannons I have about the bois

✨staring🌟 Katsuki🌟kirishima🌟shinsou🌟shoto🌟dabi🌟

✨Gn!reader no pronouns used ✨

Mentions: sex but otherwise safe 🖤

Katsuki Bakugou

•I fully believe this man listens to music like $uicideBoy$, Freddie Freddie, get scared, and Iprevail

•throw in some Ronnie radke in there

• he listens to heavy metal too

• gets big salty when you don’t let him have the aux cord

• “Oi dumbass give me the fuckin’ Aux”

•unless you have the same music taste as him, he’ll deal with it tho because he loves you but he’ll sulk in the seat till you give it to him

•has a playlist to fuck you to

• he will melt for you if you make him a special playlist

•listens to the playlist when he misses you

Ejirou Kirishima

•I feel like he had a chaotic mix between his middle school Emo days and some upbeat pop songs

•he’s okay with sharing the aux because it gives him a chance to make a playlist for you

•definitely an Ariana Grande fan

• Will usually hand you the aux unless you say otherwise

•will belt the songs with you like you two are in a teenage summer movie

•has a collab playlist with you where you both add songs you think the other would like

Hitoshi shinsou

•this man is a walking my chemical romance cover ??

•he’s Emo as shit so it’s surprising when Kesha starts playing if the aux

•honestly baffling

“Who are you”

“What”

“Who are you and what have you done with toshi”

•man is confused on why he can’t like Kesha

•probably has a playlist to fuck you to

•you two have separate playlists for each other

Shoto Todoroki

• I feel like he would listen mainly to classical or Lo-fi

•likes when you have the aux to expand his music preferences

•does NOT understand the point of the lyrics

•he’s questioning the song

•”how can she set fire to rain, that’s impossible”

• “what did she do? Why are we looking and who made her do it?”

•”if she has junk in her trunk she should probably clean it out”

•you make him a playlist is songs he’s seemed to like that you play which he greatly appreciates

•man will listen to the playlist like it’s the last thing he will ever listen to

Dabi/Touya

•has big angy music

• not metal angry but rock angry I think

• there is no doubt in my mind he has a playlist for sex

•refuses to let you use the aux he is the only one allowed when he’s in the car

• if you make him a playlist he will act like he doesn’t care for it but he really loves it

•sneaking in pop music in his personal playlist to watch his confusion

•bolting when you see him angry of what you put on his playlist

[annahxredaxted]

Domestic life was never quite my style..

Characters: guy/honey

Genre: fluff

Theme: domestic life<3

—————

Saturday, 8:28am

The way they look in the morning is indescribable. Their the most beautiful person I’ve ever seen. I couldn’t believe them no matter how much they tried to convince me that they had any matter if imperfections, in anyway shape or form. Their perfect and they’ll stay that way forever.

No matter how much they don’t think it, it’s a matter of perspective, I wish they could see themselves the way I see them. The way they are, the way their so beautiful. Like they were sculpted by gods, from the most rarest of materials, jades, golds, silvers that gleam in the sun and moon light.

Then I realized how long I’d been staring, with a love sick gaze.

“Guy? Are you okay?” They asked me tilting their head in confusion gesturing to my glass of water

“Oh yeah I’m- I’m fine honey.” I muttered to the rim of my water glass.

They rose a suspicious eyebrow, and nodded.

“Okay, just checking.” They said standing up abruptly, plate and coffee mug in hand.

They walked over to the sink, placing the items beside it. They rolled up their sleeves and flipped on the water and started quickly rinsing off their dishes.

I sighed and hopped up, walking over to the sink and mirroring their actions.

They rose the back of their hand to my forehead, their face closer to mine then it was a couple of seconds ago, their breath lightly grazing my cupids bow, my heart picked up In speed.

“Hmm you don’t have a fever, you just seemed kinda spaced out during breakfast. Your fine.” They concluded, moving their hand down too my cheek, caressing my stubble with their thumb.

“Are we- are about to kiss right now?” I asked jokingly. they gave me half a grin, before pulling me down to their level and kissing me.

They tasted like the coffee they’d been drinking prior to this occurrence. My hands found there way to their waist, pulling them in closer, their hand still on my cheek, and their other hand in my hair.

We broke apart, foreheads still touching. Hands still on eachother

“I love you honey.” I said muttering.

“I love you too.” They said back.

———

Saturday, 10:54am

“Not my fault your trash at uno honeyyy..” I said, laying a draw 4 card down on the pile.

“Fuck off.” They said rapidly shifting through their hand, desperately looking for a way out of this

“Dammit.” They mumbled drawing four cards passive aggressively, grumbling and mumbling to themselves

“Ooo is my little grumble-bear angy?” I said pinching their cheeks with my free hand, making a cooing noise.

“You have point two seconds to remove your hands before I tickle you.” They threatened not batting an eye.

Me being, at least two heads taller then the feisty Little gremlin, was unfazed at this threat.

“Alright that’s fucking it.” They concluded, jumping up and pouncing at me

Their hands made their way up my ribs, my personal weak spot when it comes to tickling.

“N-No Wait! HOONEY, MERCY PLEASEEEEee aGhhg æaaahhe HONEY PLEASE!” I begged and pleaded

“I warned you didn’t I?” They asked moving to my belly, which coincidentally was my other weak spot, they sighed and sat back down.

“Your such an asshole.” I said laughing.

“Only when you deserve it.” They retorted.

I reached over to grab a blanket from the other side of the couch, and light spread it across my cold thighs in a pair of whisp thin shorts.

—-

Saturday, 3:23pm

“I’m just telling you literally nobody likes that god damn movie.” They said pointing at the TV screen, which broadly displayed the live action avatar and the last air bender

“I hear it’s good!” I exclaimed

“From who??!!” They asked almost yelling.

I whipped out my phone to look at the reviews and they weren’t exactly the best. But I believe in giving everything a try.

“No no no, let’s just watch princess bride.” They concluded

“Ohh isn’t that the one with that one dude prince hump-her-dick?” I asked laughing

“NO ITS HUMPERDINK DUMBASS!” They sighed, sinking into the couch.

I laughed with that knowledge seared into my head now.

———

Saturday 4:45pm

“The R.O.U.S? I don’t believe those exist.” I covered my eyes as Wesley got attacked by a big rat looking thing, in some forest with fire and quicksand.

“Stop being a baby.” Honey said to me rolling their eyes.

“It’s gross, he bleeding!” I exclaimed, pulling a pillow over my eyes.

“Tell me when it’s over..” I groaned

“It’s over.” They said, I uncovered my eyes to reveal that it was not in fact over.

“You ass hole!” I said groaning.

They laughed at me, per usual. Fuck when we’re they not laughing at me?

———

Saturday 11:23pm

“Goodnight guy.” They said, leaning over to kiss me. Which I happily retaliated the action.

“Goodnight my honey.. love you.” I said into the kiss.

“Love you too.” They flipped off the lamp next to them, snuggled into my side, and quietly fell into their sleepiness.

And they all lived happily ever after

——-

TAGLISTTT

@itsdaifuku @youisagayhooman @verrverii @darlin-collins @mainhoesstuff

[momodoesposts]

shark week, a hendery fanfic

Hendery x reader

Afab reader

Word count: 1,620

Tw: period cramps, mention of pain,curse words, hendery is a jack ass, sexual jokes, mention of oral (nothing happens), ten is a cockblock, kun is embarrassed

You groan in pain at what feels like a knife twisting in your stomach. Every month you underestimate how badly cramps hurt and regret not going to the doctor's office for prescribed medicine because you're curled up on the bed, groaning and shivering in agony. You grip the plushie that your boyfriend got you, cursing yourself for letting the pain get to you.

Suddenly the door bursts open, an excitable Hendery bursting in. You squint at him, confused at the sudden intrusion. 

As soon as he catches your eyes, he jumps on the bed and wraps his arms around you, tickling your sides. "Pookie! I missed you-!" there he goes again, using that god-awful nickname again.

You push your boyfriend off of you, glaring daggers at him. Hendery holds his hands up defensively. "Woah, who peed in your cereal?" he teases, poking at your sides again. 

"Babe, I'm just in a lot of pain, okay? So, please, for the love of god, stop-!" you shove his hands off you, resulting in him pouting at you.

"Just take an Advil or something? I want to put plastic wrap in front of Xiaojun's door; come on!" he grabs your hand and pulls you towards him, and you smack his hands.

"Leave me alone, please!" you retreat under the blankets, groaning in pain. 

He quirks an eyebrow, leaning over you and hovering his face a few inches from yours with wide eyes. "Babbyyy, what's wrong? Just tell meee."

You sigh, turning away from him. "I'm on my period."

His mouth forms an 'o' shape as he drapes his arm over your body and lays behind you, effectively spooning you. "I see…" he mumbles. "So… you're in pain."

"No shit dumbass."

He sighs. "When did you get it?"

"Today, the first day is always the worst."

"Ah, when did you get it for the first time?"

"I was eleven or twelve, why?" you question.

"Just wondering."

So you stayed there with your boyfriend's arms wrapped around you, his presence helping you cope. You were drifting off when he suddenly gasped.

"Y/N…." he whispered, turning you around to face him. He held your shoulders and stared at you with wide eyes.

"Baby? What's wrong?" you felt worried seeing his face like this.

He took a few deep breaths. 

"I-I'm 23…" he whispered.

“Yeah..?" you countered, even more, confused now.

"Babe. I'm late."

"…for what?"

"I'm twelve years late! I was supposed to get my period twelve years ago! Do you know what this means?!"

You opened your mouth to scold him, but he clasped his hand over your mouth.

“Babe, we're pregnant!" he said, eyes sparkling. "I can't wait for us to raise our first child," he pretends to wipe a tear from his eye as he puts your hand on his stomach.

"Do you feel it kicking?"

You shoved his hand off of your mouth. "You dumb ass!" you throw the plushie at him, pulling him off the bed while he yelps.

"Babe- wait-I'm sorry it was a joke-!"

You slam the door on him, locking it behind his figure. Then, with a deep sigh, you return to your bed, curling up in a ball. You lay your head down to close your eyes and go to sleep when you hear your phone buzz. 

dumbass <3

-Babbyyyyy immm sorrrryyy let me innnn

-I miss u

-pls

-I was just so excited abt our baby

- TT

You scoff at his messages and watch as more come flooding in.

dumbass <3

-u r making me sad

-come on pookie

-don't make daddy angy

-grrrr

"WONG KUN-HANG, DO NOT MAKE ME BLOCK YOUR NUMBER!" you scream at him through the door, sighing.

You lay on your back and stare at the ceiling. He could be such a pain, but you loved him. Even though he was such a stupid, stupid guy who took every opportunity to get on your nerves.

You hear a scraping at the door and over as a note slides through the bottom. In scribbled handwriting, it says, "I am sorry, really. Please let me in.", complete with an awful drawing of what you can only assume is him crying.

With a groan, you get up and open the door, staring at your boyfriend with a blank face. 

He smiles wide and barges in, arms full of what he will refer to as "supplies."

"Okay baby, just lay down and nurse Hendery will take care of you!"

"You could have been a doctor, and yet you chose to be a nurse," you question, returning to bed and staring at him.

He presses a heating pack to your belly, making sure to be gentle with you. 

"Don't underestimate the nurses of this world, Y/N, they're angels on earth and here you are disrespecting them." he wiped a piece of hair out of your face.

"Listen, listen, my sisters taught me how to care for a girl when she's enduring shark week. So I'm basically an expert." he uses his fingers to gently turn your chin to face him as he sits in bed next to you.

"You do realize I kicked you out just a few minutes ago, right?"

"Shhh," he leaned in, pressing his lips to yours, but before you could reciprocate, he pressed a piece of chocolate against your lips, making you furrow your brows before biting.

"Good girl!" he teased, snuggling into your side, taking the remote, and turning on your favorite movie. 

You didn't mind this; you were feeling better thanks to the heating pad and his snuggles. Not that you would admit it. 

"I heard that getting head relieves period cramps," he suddenly said, chin high in the air as though he was proud to know this fact.

You just stared ahead in shock, not at all expecting that.

"Come on baby, let's try it!" he began quickly kissing your jawline, trailing up and nibbling at your ear. 

You shuddered in response, a soft gasp leaving your lips as he trailed kisses down your neck, gently moving the blanket off your legs.

"Hendery, stop… the others are home, don't…." you whisper.

"What was that baby? Are you afraid I'll make you feel too good?" he said, smirking as he lowered his head between your legs, pulling at the hem of your shorts.

Though your body said yes, your mind knew the other members were home. Yet, there he was, smiling up at you.

The door creaking open made you both turn your heads toward the sound. There stood Ten, holding Louis. You can vaguely see what looks like a mortified Kun behind him, but he quickly retreats after seeing the two of you in such a lewd position.

"Oh, am I interrupting something?" he asked calmly, looking between you two.

"Ye-"

"No, not at all." you gently push Hendery's head away with your knee.

"What's up?", you asked.

Ten walks in and sits down next to you, showing off the cat he is so proud of. "Look, I got him a hat!" he says, grinning as he cuddles into your side, Louis retreating into your lap. 

"Ooh, we're watching a movie?" Ten asks, somehow making himself even more comfortable.

"No, my girlfriend and I are watching a movie."

Ten stares at the TV, "Right, and now your girlfriend, you and I are watching a movie.", he restates with a cheeky grin.

Hendery takes up his spot on your other side, petting Louis with a permanent frown. You should be leaning on him, not Ten; he's your boyfriend, him, Hendery! 

You hear another meow and see Leon opening the door, jumping up and curling up in your frustrated boyfriend's lap as Ten coos at sight. 

"This is not the kind of pussy I wanted.", Hendery groans, leaning his head back.

You and Ten shares a look before laughing at his frustration. You kiss his cheek, which he quickly redirects to his lips. The two of you spend a moment with your mouths moving against each other before Ten tells you two to get a room.

"We tried to!", Hendery says, swatting at the older boy.

BONUS

After a few hours, the two boys had fallen asleep, and you left the room to get a glass of water. You see the other members on the couch, playing a console game you didn't care to check on. As you remove the cup from the cabinet, you hear someone clear their throat behind you. 

You turn to see Kun, whose ears have turned bright red. 

"Hey!" you greet him.

He shifts awkwardly. "Listen, um, I saw you and Hendery earlier and… I just want to like make sure you know that you guys are staying safe and using protection."

You turn bright red and are rendered speechless.

"Especially if Ten is going to be joining you—"

You hear a gasp and watch Yangyang enter your room, finding the two sleeping boys. 

Next thing you know, Hendery runs into the kitchen, half asleep but ready to fight, as he holds his fists up to Kun. 

"Are you after my girl, Qian, huh?! Are you?!" he says, circling him and jumping around like a madman. "You pervert! Talking to my girlfriend about sex!"

Kun holds his hands up, looking at you for help. Meanwhile, Xiaojun and Winwin stare at the scene in shock as Ten takes a video of the scene in front of him, and Yangyang cackles.

You pull your boyfriend away, smacking him gently. 

That video would end up in the hands of Johnny, who would send it to Mark, and the next thing you knew, Sungchan was texting you asking why Hendery was so mad.

God, those boys were nosy gossips.

[lowcosmic]

—— kokichi with a calm , amab reader .

— 𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: headcannons of kokichi with a very calm and patient male reader who defends kokichi after he gets bullied.

— 𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞 : fluff

— 𝐜𝐰 : mean / rude stuff ,, takes place in killing game.

— 𝐚/𝐧 : so , this was requested — but the request itself was like 6 paragraphs so uh … lmao but thanks for the request !! by the way, the request said , “ What I remember in the game … ” so that’s the reason why i did in - game. feel free to request again otherwise!

*** “ (in/c) ” = insert character of choice ***

kokichi would love teasing and pranking the crap out of you , just to try to get a reaction other than loving , kind stares and words from you. of course , it always fails.

he’d , no joke , try every trick in the book. but you were always respectful , polite , and so gosh dang calm.

no matter. kokichi still had fun pulling them off.

kokichi would also try to anger you , because even during angie’s annoying ramblings about atua or gonta’s total obliviousness to many scenarios — you were still gentle and cool - headed.

he’d shoot you with comments such as , “ come on , it’s oooobviously kirumi's fault! you’re giving off maaajor dumbass vibes right now!! don’t tell me you’re impersonating kaito now or whatever — i can only handle one idiot sack in this joint! ”

i also think that he’d pull the ‘ toothpaste in oreo ’ thing , only for you to thank him for freshening up your teeth or breath or whatever , but maybe that’s just me.

anyways , when kokichi first saw you angry , he was a bit … well , surprised , to say the least.

(in/c) was rudely talking to him — and instead of kokichi’s usual snappy and comeback prepared manner , he seemed to be shot down. almost like he was letting the words affect him.

you casually ambled over there with restrained words — stepping in front of him.

kokichi could practically see fumes floating off your body , his usual demeanor perking up a bit.

you spoke sternly , the person being caught off guard for a moment before retorting with something like , “ aww , what — your big bad boyfriend lost his balls and so he depends on you now? what a bi — !! ”

and then you uppercutted (in/c)’s jaw — the thud of their body falling to the ground echoing in kokichi’s ears.

kokichi shook a bit. crap , you were actually scary.

(in/c) had fallen unconscious , a smirk on kokichi's face appearing.

“ nihishishi~ , you didn’t think i’d actually let them bully me , riight? i just faked that to see your reaction. and what a show that was! bravo , my heroic knight! ”

after slightly cringing at the newfound nickname , you made sure he was alright , the angry gaze in your eyes disappearing within a matter of seconds.

that day on , kokichi stayed by your side and never tried to cross your boundaries — though he did cross other people’s , just to see your protective reaction.

please don’t repost , translate , or claim my works as your own.

[enthusiasticenthusiast]

══╡BULLY HEADCANONS╞══

jimmy is physically unable to grow his hair more than 2cm, hence the buzzcut - the other styles are just wigs

gord, lola and pinky are the mean bisexuals and meaner lesbian trio who will gossip about anything

most of bryce’s aquaberry clothes are hand me downs but chad bought him a new vest which he adores

lefty and thad are the only left handed students

peanut just doesn’t respond to ‘larry’ anymore. he even questions it on the loud speaker - “who even is that larry?” “you dumbass!”

bo lance and gloria are all related - lance and gloria are siblings and bo is their cousin

vance absolutely loves the look of aquaberry though he’ll never admit it

christy and wade have the biggest love hate relationship

they once swapped places at school when they were 6 and no one noticed nor cared

justin hates bif with a passion and torments him

jimmy got back once and called him a genetically deformed rat however and he went off on one for a week

kirby was left paralysed from the waist down after the frame fell on him in the fire — (i’m sorry but he should not have just got up and walked away after he was saved i don’t care 💀)

dr crabblesnitch made the school more wheelchair accessible after this

he is off the football team however is still one of the jocks and will run you over with his wheelchair if he feels so

he watches from the bleachers and some dare say he’s a better cheerleader than mandy

trent still loved kirby a lot and pushes him most places

lola wears johnny’s ring on a necklace

she’s also the only person to really notice peanuts love for johnny

ted and damon practised kissing on each other when they were 13 and ted liked mandy

safe to say kissing her was not like kissing damon at all

angie, christy and beatrice have matching bracelets

nobody besides pedro likes sheldon but he doesn’t notice

russell’s favourite south park character is butters

gary moved into johnny’s old cell in the asylum

he tried (and failed) to be king there

the uniform was finally tailored to fit algie

[dunmertitty]

i love it when people make posts about ‘purity culture” bc it’s like okay so are we talking about actual issues here regarding whorephobia queerphobia racism etc or are you angy bc someone dunked on you for shipping incest. did you make a dumbass reply on someone’s blog and they screenshotted your wincest account and put the bidoofs law post by it. bc that’s not censoring you that’s just someone being funny. is someone “attacking” you or did you post cringe in every single fandom tag and violate tumblr spam rules so someone reported you

[weirdcat1213]

another day another week ANOTHER FUCKING VOLUME-

okok lets relax

vol 11 thoughts

chap 1:

you know i barely remember this so it should be fun :D

-CHAPEL IDC IF THIS A FLASHBACK BUT THE TF OUT OF MY HOUSE

-"all he did was to shoot you in the spine" lmao elendira calling legato a baby is my favorite thing

-you know what girlie youre so right- oh a joke? damn it

-ily zazie, youre so cool

-VASH SLEEPING IN THE CAR :D

-oh hey brad is here

-ah NO NOT THE AFTERMATH MOMENTS NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

-brad, brad, honey....he knows

-why is my poor baby apologizing :c

-i mean brad's fears are valid and all but HE DOESNT KNOW AND WE KNOW AND VASH KNOWS AND ITS ALL JUST REALLY SAD

-GIVE MY MAN A BREAK LMAO XD

-also i can relate to livio here cuz rn my environment is too trusting and im so paranoid about security like yeah vash, i would never sleep in the back of a car of someone whom i just met you dumbass-

-shut up literally shut up

-fair

-Ion Blaster TM time :3

-final phase you say-

-oh....oh no. vash, this is gonna be one of those moments where you sigh and curse knives for being kinda right

-oh he angy xd

-OHH RIGHT YEAH

-yeap...they are fucked atm

-OMG ITS THEM THEYRE COMING YIPPYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY :D

chap 2

-THEYRE ALMOST HEREEEEE

-catch me being that guy when the end comes (just a dude in a coat with a hat playing music, thats gonna be me)

-oh god no, the worst and most boring thing you could do is to label knives as a terrorist. the guy is so much more and that word just doesnt fit him

-yes thank you! no time for nonsense

-THERE SHE IS HEY GIRLLLLL ITS BEEN SO LONG, TOO LONG, YOU LOOK SO PRETTY :3

-MILLY MY BELOVEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEED

-when was the last time we saw them? 2 volumes ago?

-"i would never would have imagined this. that the world could change so fast" and that goes on the list of "timeless trigun things" or TTT for short

-:c

-wait so...transphobe guy? get yeeted

-oh...oh i didnt remember...oh i will cry

-ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh the reunioooooooooon

-look at their fucking faces, they missed each other so much

-tbh if i met the most jesus-allegory guy ever, then lost trail of where or how he was for 2 volumes of a manga ,to find him later in the middle of a silly fight i would also cry

-that scene with the pieces of earth announcement makes me kinda sad, no one will come for us

-geesus christ

-ohhh kinda pretty tho, looks like a phoenix

chap 3:

-"its all happening so fast" yeah sorry dude, its a trigun tradition

-HE LOOKS SO HAPPY, HIS DUTY (according to him) OF PROTECTING THE PEOPLE IS ALMOST DONE

-"do you want me to come along?" he would be the best person to go to public places when you are too anxious to talk to strangers

- NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO DONT ASK PLS NO

-livio honey what was the idea here "oh you guys seem like you liked him. i actually killed him. well not me but also me. im sorry"

-milly my girl is cursed to be the 1st and og wolfwood stan in any version. we feel your pain girl

-LMAO THE NOTE ABOUT ZAZIE XD

-AWWWWWWWWWWWWW :3 A BAG OF LITTLE THINGSSS

-NOT VASH CARRYING FIGURINES AROUND, HES LIKE ME FR FR WITH MY KEYCHAINS

-also ofc he has rare figurines, the man has had enough time to look for it lmao

-ok but imagine if vash actually had lost the coins xd

-the pressure and guilt livio must feel rn. his brother died trying to protect him and he has the official Vash Thinks Youre Cool stamp. he has to change cuz if he doesnt he would throw all of that away and really stop being human

-you did good brad

-"must be lonely" im eating my own arm

-oh im really crying over this, ok, fun

-i also dont know what to do vash the stampede but im begging you to ASK FOR HELP YOU MFFFFFFFFFF

-AH SHIT ZAZIE NO

-AH FUCK ITS HIM

chap 4:

-july 20th? ah great, july 20th-21st is cursed here too

-rad as hell as always

-huh, i expected knives to just yeet them on sight

-i would say him and humans are pretty much alike but ok, sure,hm

-i love her being suspicious of legato 1st xd

-i wonder how can this go wrong, seems like a solid plan

-oh right...him

-YEAH GO GET HIM >:3

-oh...oh thats so cool. like his body doesnt work...but he controls it...but not in the same way a human would...wow

-OH BEAUTIFUL EYE HOLY SHIT THATS BEAUTIFUL

-GATE CONSUMING STUFF YOU SAY.....HMMMMM I WONDER WHERE I SAW THE SAME TRIGUN CONCEPT-

(side note: "you still dont know how to control your gate" SO THATS HOW IT LOOKS WHEN YOU CONTROL IT? IT ONLY CONSUMES/CREATE WHAT YOU WANT?? ORANGEEE)

-MAGIC BULLETSSSSSS

-LMAO THE HOLE XD

-vash you cant say shit about silly haircuts im sorry

-also "new hair new outlook"...........i will curl myself into the moon

-they forgor

-who are you

-also ngl i never got the idea of what the coins did so lets find out

chap 5:

-SHES FUCKING HERE REJOICEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

-wait wdym neural blocking programs

-LMAO XD

-LIVIO IS SO SCARED AND WITH REASON

-just the two of us :3

-i love his game face and then its just "ugh i cant do this" xd

-"fight vash the stampede fight" me cheering vash on in stampede

-vash i love you but you cant call my wife a bitch, thats not polite

-oh livio, oh i didnt get to appreciate you too much on my 1st read but come here man, come here. youre doing great

-they have officially trauma bonded :3 (ik thats a terrible oversimplification but leave me alone)

-"is it possible for something created by humans to completely break away from their creators?" yes next question

-OH NO IS THIS THE VOLUME WITH *THAT SCENE*?

-"you really have become a crybaby" and im glad cuz she was always so serious with her job and all, now she can express her feelings more

-STOPPPP THIS ALWAYS GETS ME CUZ AHHHHHH STOP

-AH NAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH :C

-...........and thats story is technically stampede but anyway jajajajaja :D

-the prettiest eyes

-FUNNY ENOUGH HE DOES LOOK LIKE A BUG

-OH ITS TIME ITS FUCKING TIME HOLY SHIT

chap 6:

-the title :c

-liviooooooo :c

-HEY! my boi can still kick your ass >:[

-DONT YOU EVEN *DARE*

-just leave him out of this pls

-i love that he still considers himself human <3 i want to think wolfwood taught him that indirectly

-FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT

-I MEAN YES YOURE RIGHT BUT CAN YOU NOT???

-huh, the silhouette kinda looks like wolfwo- *gunshot*

-i love knowing exacty what livio is thinking rn

-aww :3

-liviooooooooooo :c

-his cowboy era is about to start im so proud of him :')

[skaruresonic]

@beevean Out of morbid curiosity, I watched episode one of Netflixavania following a video explaining games lore (disclaimer: just the Classic era. There seems to be A Lot covered in this franchise). My first impressions are: = Despite being almost comically edgy, I really wasn't emotionally impacted by the writing. It almost felt like it was just going through the motions. We begin the show with the start of Dracula and Lisa's relationship, and yet we're told it was this great transformative love instead of being shown that. One minute she's convinced him to let her stay, the next she's being burned at the stake. Wow. The tragedy. Break out the tissues. Dracula says he loved her, ofc, but since we don't get to see their relationship in action, the show might as well shrug and be like "just trust me dood"

= It's really ironic that a show paying lip service to science conveniently forgets that burn stake victims were likely to die or fall unconscious from smoke inhalation before the actual burning. Meaning Lisa wouldn't have had the time to scream and plead for as long as she had.

= ...Is this another one of those "all religion is bad and I am smart for shitting on it" works? Because I had enough of that with Mists of Avalon lmao. Not that I'm the biggest fan of Christianity, but anti-Christianity tracts like these tend to be equally fucking obnoxious because they're always so one-note, disingenuous, and boring with how they constantly beat you over the head with "religion bad" and don't really add anything else to that particular thought

= Wallachia is portrayed as like, cartoonishly backwater. Women doctors existed in the Middle Ages. They were not all automatically burned at the stake because hurr durr technology is evil.

Some of them even treated kings; I recall reading about a medieval Jewish doctor who cured a young king's eye condition. somehow I get the feeling the writer of this show has not read A History Book

= I also found it funny how the priest named "strange weeds" in the list of Lisa's possessions, as if the people of medieval Wallachia were so backwards that they didn't know what fucking herbs were.

The absolute lmao. = I don't really know anything about Dracula other than he decided to oppose God due to the death of his first wife in the games, but even then, despite my sheer lack of knowledge, I still sensed something off about his characterization here. Given how the show practically has Dracula spell it out for us that He Really Loved Lisa More Than These Stinky Humans, I Swear Just Trust Me Dood at the episode's climax, I had the feeling that if someone like him had been told his wife was dying, he'd fly like the wind to go try and rescue her. Or, failing that, unleashing unholy wrath upon her killers. But no, he just broods to the old woman just to be Dramatique. no talk him, he angy >:c = crying blood. CRAAAAAWLING IN MY CRAAAAAWL, THESE CRAWL THEY WILL NOT CRAAAAAAAAWL = Alucard tells Dracula to go after the one who killed Lisa instead of condemning all of humanity to death, but he already fucking saw who did it so like lmao what kind of logic is this = The people of Wallachia were too dumb to live actually. And kinda had it coming tbh. Imagine you don't think Satan exists but one day he shows up out of nowhere in a cloud of hellfire and tells you to gtfo before he kills you all. And instead of getting the fuck out of Dodge that very night because holy crap Satan is real after all and worse, he's pissed off, you decide to stay. Like dumbasses. = oh is this just Hunchback of Notre Dame without the sexual repression? k cool. = I'll bet the animators really liked drawing all that gore. ow the edge = Why did we spend five minutes on a not-funny, prolonged bestiality joke? It did nothing but waste time. Is this what passes for humor on this show?

= Well. That just happened. Thought it'd be more interesting than that but nah