#Anti-Black Fairy

[themattress]

OUAT: The Bland Fairy

I’ve been re-engaging with Once Upon a Time recently and thus naturally am going to further talk about it, and one subject I feel really deserves more attention is the character of Fiona, aka the Black Fairy from Season 6. And specifically why she failed so hard at being the Biggest Bad of the whole story the way she was hyped up to be and is just kinda boring. 

See, throughout the show there have been mentions of a mysterious someone who created the Dark Curse that is the source of so much misery, plus scattered references to things like dark fairy dust and the Black Fairy’s Wand which of course made many fans interested in who this Black Fairy was. The revelation made in Season 6 that the Black Fairy is the one that created the Dark Curse actually makes perfect sense, especially since timeline-wise the first tip-off of its existence came from an unsettled facial reaction from the Blue Fairy. And since the Blue Fairy has been a major character on the good side since the beginning, the Black Fairy as her evil counterpart and the ultimate foe that Emma must face makes sense.

And then she showed up. Despite being played well by Jaime Murray, the character we got had a major problem holding her back. Let’s go down a list of her traits to see what that is.

Powerful evil figure who was banished long ago - That’s kind of like the description of the Evil Queen we opened the show on, albeit not so “long ago”. It also calls to mind Cora’s banishment to Wonderland, the Jabberwocky’s imprisonment in Wonderland, the Snow Queen’s confinement in Arendelle, and even what befell Tinker Bell given that it was the Blue Fairy who banished her as well. The point I’m making is that it’s a generic set-up for a villain.

Lives in a dark realm - One literally called “the Dark Realm”. And that’s cool, but we already had it done twice, first with Peter Pan in Neverland and then with Hades in the Underworld.

Kidnaps children - For chronic child-nappers, we already had Rumple and Pan (ironically enough). Otherwise, we’ve also had kidnappings and attempted kidnappings made by Regina, Zelena, Cruella, Hades, and even Snow and Charming! It’s not unique at this point.

Abuses the children she kidnaps - Sorry, Pan did it first and and he did it better.

Is willing to murder children - You could probably count on one hand the amount of villains on this show that weren’t willing to sink that low. Hell, the Blind Witch made a whole career out of murdering and eating children, and she’s by and large depicted as a comedic villain!

Is a parent to Rumplestilstskin - Yep, she’s Rumple’s mother and the former wife of the man who would become Peter Pan. And I’m sorry, but Pan had stronger “Ultimate Villain” credentials. And he didn’t even need to be that hyped up as one; he just kind of was one.

Chooses power over love - How many villains have done this at this point?  Damn near all of them?  Even King Arthur did it!  It’s really not that impressive to see a villain do anymore.

Rips hearts out and controls people with them - Again; what villain hasn’t by now?

Is an important female enemy to Emma - Like Regina, Ingrid and Nimue before her, then.

Casts the Dark Curse for evil purposes - Uh-huh. Exactly like Regina, Pan and Nimue. 

Wants to break the Laws of Magic - Jafar, who made some guest spots in the very same season Fiona was in, also attempted to do that...and temporarily succeeded too! And wasn’t all that Author malarkey in Season 4 basically breaking the Laws of Magic too, given that it retconned history, forced people to fall in love with others, and had the ability to sort of bring people back from the dead? Figures; Season 4 comes back to bite the show yet again!

Used to be good then turned bad - So exactly like roughly 99% of this show’s villains.

Used to be human but now isn't - Pan, Jafar, and every Dark One ever says “hi”.

Even Evil Has Loved Ones - Fiona loves her son Rumple and grandson Gideon in spite of everything. Villains who also displayed the capacity for love include Rumple himself, Regina, King George, Cora, Hook, Greg and Tamara, Zelena, Ingrid, Ursula, Maleficent, King Arthur, Hades, Jafar, Anastasia, and even the split Evil Queen and Mr. Hyde. So not at all special.

Joins forces with Rumplestiltskin - Villains who have made deals and alliances with Rumple include Regina, King George, Pan, Zelena, Ingrid, Ursula, Cruella, Maleficent, Isaac, Hades, Mr. Hyde, the split Evil Queen, and even minor villains such as the Mad Hatter and Dr. Frankenstein. Even Hook as Dark Hook has technically worked together with Rumple!

Has a theatrical, even somewhat campy demeanor - LIKE. MOST. VILLAINS.

Becomes Mayor of Storybrooke and Henry's adoptive mother - She quite literally ripped this off from Regina. To the point where people honestly wondered if the role she was playing was originally intended for the split Evil Queen who began the same season as the Big Bad.

Proficient at psychological manipulation - Rumple, Cora, Pan, Ingrid, Nimue, Hades and the Jabberwocky all share this quality, as do Dr. Facilier and Mother Gothel in Season 7.

Engages in a back-up contingency plan - Her plan to win the Final Battle through Emma succumbing to doubt fails, but that’s OK since she has a back-up plan in motion through her control over Gideon’s heart. Clever, but we’ve seen this kind of thing from other villains in the past such as Regina, Cora, Pan, Rumple, and Jafar. It doesn’t help that Fiona sabotages herself by not sucking it up and accepting Belle as family, naturally causing Rumple to turn on her and, despite her confidence to the contrary, play a role in foiling her contingency plan.

Is killed by Rumplestiltskin - Cora was killed by Rumple in an indirect way, Zelena appeared to be killed by Rumple for a while, and of course Rumple directly killed his other parent, Pan, and would later go on to kill his Wish Realm counterpart by killing himself.

Literally everything in Fiona’s character is shared with other villains. There isn’t anything remotely original about her. On top of that, she isn’t impressively powerful (Zelena hits her with a car at one point; good luck taking her seriously after that) nor is she especially loathsome the way other villains including her own son and former husband have been. 

The only thing that makes Fiona stand out is that the crisis she causes in “The Final Battle” has the highest stakes in the series given that the endgame of her Dark Curse is that all realms but the Land Without Magic get annihilated by Dark Magic itself due to the magical imbalance created by the Savior’s fading belief (which is stupid, but I digress), and Fiona does have an interesting philosophy about why she’s justified in doing this and why the outcome is even preferable to the way things are...but sadly, this philosophy is barely explored. How could it be, when Fiona only appears in 8 episodes and she spends the majority of them just flitting around and going “Mwahaha, look at me, I’m so evil!” instead of getting to the damn point. In the end, the dreaded Black Fairy is one of the most bland and forgettable major villains in all of Once Upon a Time. Her story was better off being untold.

[insomniac-dormouse]

They all call themselves fairies. Considering that they are all fairies.

There are three courts, for lack of better term.

Fairies are divided amongst the three, ever since an incident surrounding one of the four fae royals. The following council, would prevent any repetition of the incident. The remaining fairies were allowed to sort themselves amongst the remaining three royals, deciding the restrictions that would be placed on their magic.

Those that threw their lot in with the younger sister, were seen as the weakest court. This court, so often demeaned with labels such as troll and anti-fairy, would remain close to nature and their magic would be tied to superstition. Theirs wanted as little do with humanity as they could manage.

Those that sided with the brother, were seen as a bore. This court, mockingly called pixies, would be weaves into the working of humanity. Theirs was industry and deal-making and influence the bureaucracy that kept it all in motion. Their magic wasn’t spectacle; it’s was versatility.

Those that chose to follow the older sister, were seen as gluttonous and hedonistic. This court, that was only entertained by the sneered title of imp, would focus on being known. Their magic left a mess wherever they went, making humans believe in them, making humans fear them, making humans love them. They were the only court to create new fairies, changelings that would be sorted into one of the three courts based, not on any choice of their own, but on whatever bets the council had made.

After annexing of the fourth royal, all magic use at the hands of the fey became wreathed in laws and rules and oaths and promises. Complicit and consenting, they were reduced to spirits by their own hands.

The fairy mind was a bizarre thing to comprehend.

[misspayn-e]

Anti Version of my oc, she might be important she might not :) 🤷🏾‍♀️ let me know if you like her… lol

[recomendandburn]

Adressing the removal of Cocooned by GamerBearMira from my recommendations

The following types of ficts will never EVER appear in this blog as i don't agree with the writers attitudes and/or opinions, just flat out don't enjoy the tropes/ships used in them or (in the case of number 36) left the fadom for good and refuse to dip my toes into it again for reasons i will not elaborate on:

Ficts containing Severus Snape bashing or just writen by someone who hates him.

2. Fics containing Sirius Black bashing or just writen by someone who hates him (though i may make an exception for a particular Prince Chaser fic)

3. Fics containing Remus Lupin bashing or just writen by someone who hates him

4. magical Dudley Dursley and/or magical Petunia Dursley fics

5. Albus Dumbledore centric fics

6. Ron Weasley centric fics

7. Peter Pettigrew centric fics

8. Petunia Dursley centric fics

9. Reader insert fics

10. Fics were Regulus Black is in a monogamous relationship with a girl or a woman or in a polyamourus relationship where they don't just share the other man

11. Fics where Albus Dumbledore is shipped with anyone besides Grindelwald

12. Fics that have Romione as its main or sole ship

13. Fics That contain spanking

14. Fics that contain piss or belly kink

15. Fics where sentient animal characters from Disney get turned into humans just so that the author can make human ocs to be their kids

16. Fics were Rubeus Hagrid is shipped with anyone besides Madame Maxine

17. Rubeus Hagrid centric fics

18. desi, Black or Indian Potter Family, Harry Potter and/or James Potter (sorry but i headcanon James and by proxy Harry as being half Japanese from Euphemia's side so i can't picture either of them as having dark skin)

19. Black Hermione granger ( i can agree with her being mixed race due to her parents' ancestry but i personally don't think either her or her either parents as being black themselves)

20. Mal Bertha bashing fics or fics wrote by someone who hates her

21. Fics containing monogamus Jaylos as its main or sole ship (sorry but a spanish fic ruined them for me)

22. Fics containing monogamous Benlos as its main or sole ship

23. Alma Madrigal centric fics

24. Fics under the tag Extremely underage and/or shotacon

25. Fics where Petunia is shipped with anyone from Lily Evans Potter's imediate social cicle (ie Severus Snape or any of the marauders) or with anyone born during the golden trio era

26. Fics with Julieta Madrigal/Agustín Madrigal as it's main or sole ship

27. Fics where Antonio Madrigal is shipped with Pumped Up Juancho or anyone older than him

28. Fics containing parent/incest being shown in a positive light

29. Fics where Harry Potter is a Elf or a naga

30. Fics centered on non pagan religions of any kind, have those religions as vital plot points or reference the holy texts of those religions

31. Fics with Bad Spelling and/or grammar

32. Fics where cisgender male characters are feminized forcebly or not

33. Fics with monogamous Bal as its main or sole ship

34. Fics with Devie as its main or sole ship

35. Fics about or featuring Bellamione as an endgame ship

36. Fics from the Total Drama and/or Total Dramarama fandoms

37. Fics about or featuring Ronarry

38. Fics about or featuring Harmony

39. Fics about or featuring Neville Longbottom /Harry Potter

40. Fics about or featuring Ginny Weasley/Draco Malfoy

41. Fics about or featuring Draco Malfoy/Lord Voldemort as an endgame ship

42. Fics about or featuring Gruvia as its endgame ship

43. Fics about or featuring monogamus Style as it's endgame ship

44. Wendy Testaburguer centric fics

45. Fics where Wendy Testaburguer is shipped with anyone besides Bebe

46. Fics where the relationship between Max and David (from camp camp) is more than platonic

47. Fics where the relationship between Minerva McGonagall and any of her students is more than platonic

48. Fics where Alastor Moody is shipped with anyone (though i will make an exception for a particular Jamione fic)

49. Fics where Amelia Bones is shipped with any canonically established character besides Minerva.

50. Fics where Kingsley Shacklebolt is shipped with any canonically established character

51. Fics where Dobby is shipped with any human character

52. Fics about or featuring creatures, cargo or animals being shipped with any human characters

53. Fics about or featuring Harry Potter being paired with either Susan or Amelia Bones

54. Fics about or featuring not one-sided Colin Creevey/Harry Potter

55. Bella Swan centric fics

56. Philosophy centric fics

57. Juvia lockser centric fics

58. Molly Weasley centric fics

59. Fics were Peter Pettigrew is shipped with Lucius Malfoy, Regulus Black, Narcissa Black Malfoy, Barty crouch Jr, Severus Snape or any of the people the rat animagus canonically betrayed.

60. Fics about or featuring Klaine as its endgame ship

61. Fics about or featuring Druna (sorry but even if i was a fan, AVPS would have ruined them for me)

62. Fics where Amelia Bonee is paired with any of The Marauders or Severus Snape

63. Fics about or featuring Drinny.

64. Fics where Sirius Black identifies as Genderfluid or in any way partially with female oriented genders (i'm sorry but he is one of those characters that i picture as either identifying themselves as 100% female or not female at all. No in between)

65. Ficts were every single character is Aroace or the author just plans for everyone to die single (look, its fine if you want your fict to no be centered on the romance but at least add in some mention of romance for God's sake. Don't be like corncarrotpineappletuna who oh so desperately NEEDS you to remember that at least in their fics, NOT A SIGLE NEXT GEN CHARACTER WILL BE BORN cause they made it a point to sigle handedly destroy every single canonically established couple without presenting us with new ones. Cause their ficts are NOT ROMANCE Centric)

66.ficts containing spanking, pissporn, 💩 eating (yup those exist), farting and any other shit like that.

67.Fics writen by Antis

... And if you go to my other blog (@sendandburn) and check the list of Encanto Antis to block/follow you'll see that GamerBearMira appears on it so their fics will NEVER under any circumstances be recommended by me ever again.

[physalian]

What No one Tells You about Writing Fantasy, #2!

I did this list about 7 annoyances about fantasy, but I write in this genre for a reason! Fantasy knows no bounds, it can encompass all other genres within it. You can write a fantastical murder mystery, fantasy horror, fantasy romance, political drama, slice-of-life, comedy, whatever you’d like!

Whether it’s urban or high fantasy, supernatural or scientific, here’s seven great benefits of writing in this genre:

1. No modern means of communication

Unless you’re writing a world with phones or phone-adjacent devices. Phones and instant communication seriously inhibits the plausibility of dramatic irony and tension when you have to keep coming up with reasons to keep your characters from calling or texting each other everything they know. It’s exhausting, I tell you, and such a relief when phones aren’t a factor.

With that said, without phones, you have complete freedom to design your own magical channels of supernatural FaceTime, as weird and zany as you want. But without instant connections? Your character who knew too much can’t pass on the intel before they die. Your hero team can’t call for backup in their darkest hour. Otherwise easily preventable tragedies and deadly miscommunications are now very real.

2. The Monster Allegory

Fantasy and sci-fi tend to overlap more than they’re set apart, and in that overlap sits the monster allegory. Everything from werewolves to vampires to witches, reapers, demons, angels, goblins, trolls, wraiths, fairies, mermaids, ghosts, to Eldritch horrors and your classic Hollywood cast of mummies, creatures from the black lagoon, and Frankenstein.

Most of the time, the monsters aren’t just monsters, they represent a monstrous aspect of society the author wants to challenge and caricaturize in a fun and entertaining way. Or, the monsters are the good guys and the humans are the real terrors. Or, you’ve got two kinds of monsters to allegory two human sides. Sometimes they represent metaphorical demons, like vampires often representing addiction and werewolves repressed identities.

What all of this boils down to is the hyperbolic nature of science fantasy that allows you to go over-the-top with your metaphor and allegory in a way that a book grounded in reality just can’t.

3. Magic Systems!

Do you love world building? Do you love filling pages upon pages with your cool and unique set of superpowers you want your characters to have? Do you dream about your fight scenes and dramatic slow-mo shots?

Then Fantasy is for you!

There are zero limits to how you want to define your magic system. You can go classic with the familiar archetypes of elemental magic, wizards, sorcerers, and witches. Or you can step off the beaten path and design a whole new funky system of power sets. Best part? Your readers will have an awesome time imagining themselves with those powers, and debating endlessly about how it works.

4. Real-World Politics, who?

Amazon’s Rings of Power was twice-doomed when they only got the rights to adapt the appendices of The Silmarillion and when they decided to inject current political problems into a timeless story written purposefully to be divorced from those politics. You *can* write about human politics, but in fantasy, you don’t have to. You *can* interpret Lord of the Rings to be an allegory about the World Wars, but no matter how hard you argue, it wasn’t written with that intent.

Which means: Even if your story is set in the reality-adjacent fantasy version of 1543, you are free from the following: Racism, homophobia, sexism, religious bigotry, mental health bigotry, gender norms, anti-feminism, toxic masculinity, and more. “But that’s how it was-”

Nope. This is fantasy. You built this world, you decided to keep in the discrimination. Or… You can fill your fantasy world with a rainbow of gays, POCs in power, women in power, men unafraid to be compassionate and caring, a religion that doesn’t foster hate and division, the list goes on. You. Are. Free.

5. Nothing is too “unrealistic”

Both that you will always have people whining about how X would never happen so write the book you want to read, but also because fantasy is fake. Fairies aren’t real. Mermaids aren’t real. There are no rules for how they must be written and that’s how we have so much variety with so much room for interpretation by so many creators. Twilight made how much money writing about vampires that sparkle like diamonds in sunlight and crack like marble?

This is fantasy, it’s supposed to be unrealistic. Yes, your plot should make sense, but don’t be afraid to get weird. Write at least some of your story dependant on those fantasy elements. Write a story that can’t just be told in the real world minus the spectacle. Don’t be afraid to be sincerely fantastical and weird. People love weird. People love loving weird.

6. You are in complete control

But you do still need to research, unfortunately. Unless this is urban fantasy that depends at least a little on the human world, yours is completely your own to govern like a god tweezing weeds from their garden. You get to design your own geography and weather patterns and seasons. Your own countries and kingdoms and politicians. Your epic pre-canon fantasy war and the stakes that it was fought over. Your species, races, and ethnicities.

It’s a shame that a movie like Avatar (2009) set out to be this wholly unique take on aliens with music completely divorced from earthly bonds, new languages and a visually and culturally distinct alien species… and ended up a largely generic blue Pocahontas in space. It forgot that it was fantasy and didn’t go weird enough. They have horses, monkeys, wolves, rhinos, and deer just re-skinned with some extra limbs and colors. It’s pretty but it’s so, so shallow.

It could have become a cult classic like many a positively *weird* 80s off-beat fantasies, and now it just… exists. It makes a whole lot of money but its impact on the cultural zeitgeist is negligible. I’m the only person I know that can name every major character in the movie, and I’m no Avatar obsessor. They had complete creative control, and this is what they did with it. Don’t be Avatar. Take your creative freedom and run.

7. Even if it has been done before, do it again

You can say this about any genre, particularly romance, but fantasy and sci-fi, by the gatekeep-y nature of their fans, can be a lot less forgiving when it comes to claims of “unoriginality”. No one hates Star Wars more than Star Wars fans. Fans of these genres can get… concerningly attached to their favorite stories (mostly because the people who like them had only their fictional heroes to protect them from very real bullies).

But Game of Thrones exists because the author likes Lord of the Rings and went “yes, but what if it was an R-rated parade of misery?” Dungeons and Dragons exists because people wanted to roleplay in an LotR-esque world. Legolas and Gimli single-handedly defined what a badass elf and dwarf looks like in high fantasy. And people still gobble up media ripping shamelessly, or even good-naturedly, from this one story.

So on my other list, I argued that the sum of your parts is still original, even if the components aren’t. On this list, I implore you this: It’s not stealing or appropriating to write another Legolas if you love Legolas. Everyone loves Legolas. How many generic buff action heroes do we have and love? How many Hallmark romances tread the same predictable path? Who gives a damn if it’s unoriginal? Just make it entertaining and have something fresh to say in the end (or don’t, that’s fine too), and people will read it.

And when people say “Oh, you mean like Legolas”, take it as a compliment, not an insult. Yes, exactly like Legolas. Here’s my new elf because I adore this other book, now watch him go on a new adventure that I wrote for him.

[feyclowns]

touching on the fey — newborns and babies

reproduction/childhood, biology and social hierarchy/dynamics i think are the most changed aspects of my au. here are some notes on newborns (anti-wanda, juandissimo, and sanderson pictured)

anti-fairies are born after just 3 months, small with large wings and ears- not cubed but foop/irep has a genetic mutation. they all have pointed ears and claws. they instinctively grab, cling and latch and have poor eyesight, capable of loosely mimicking parents' speech. it is not uncommon for them to have teeth.

they rapidly become more independent over the following months, and go from teeny helpless little bundles wrapped up in their own wings to scrabbly, hungry, vocal little creatures. they're curious little buggers and inherent lovers of chaos.

common mutations are ear shapes, devil tails, horns and hooves (hooves are cherub descent). anti-wanda was born with black hair that lightened with age.

fairies are born after several years(still not sure just how long)- large with small wings and only their primary and neural cores active. i will write about the core system later. they are not round but are chubby little guys, having drained a lot of magic to develop and be able to function independently. they're big in proportion to their parents, definitely two arms needed to carry for the average small fairy. there are several subspecies and fairies are from the branch of True Fey.

they are open-eyed and more cognizant than human newborns, able to lift their heads, grab for things (poorly) and follow movement. they make noises but no words, and are capable of smiling. they will learn to scoot around rather quickly, but their magic cores develop first, so while they might be able to move around and interact/understand their parents their speech and mental growth is extremely delayed. it is not uncommon for them to have full heads of hair.

common mutations are cherubism, four wings, butterfly wings and pointed ears.

pixies are additionally born after several years (though not as long as a fairy), large, open-eyed and more cognizant than a fairy baby. while they're sleepy and non-emotive, they are very good with motor functions and enjoy repetitive behaviors.

like fairies, they only have their primary and neural cores active, but pick up learning language and physical advancement far faster than their fairy cousins- pixies take longer to pick up magic instead. they're intelligent, dexterous and quickly become independent- i want you to imagine a toddler in a suit calmly making themself a bowl of cereal, utilizing a stool.

pixies do not show much genetic diversity. most pixies reproduce extremely rarely (with the exception of One) due to biological and social limits. all pixies are born with straight black hair, rounded ears and unusually dull eyes for a magic being- a pixie and a fairy will almost always make another pixie; their genes are very dominant.

[neganerd]

I wonder what Foop will look like.

Would he be the opposite of Peri personality wise? Like, if Peri is smooth and sassy would Foop/Irep be too literal and have 0 charisma?

Would he look like Peri, but dark blue and black hair or have the opposite of Peri's physical features?

Would he change his name too and use Peri's name, but backwards or will he choose his own unique name?

And most importantly, what would their relationship be like? Bet it'd be what it was when they were children but cranked up to 100 lol

(they could throw some homoerotic tension between them because why not? Fairy x Anti-fairy enemies to lovers yaoi goes hard)

[butchlesbiancosmo]

okay okay okay. here’s a headcanon that just REFUSES to leave me alone

if cosmo is canonically the most magically powerful fairy (at least before peri is born) nerfed only by his “pure of heart, dumb of ass” personality, then as his opposite that would mean anti cosmo is the weakest anti fairy but makes up for it with his intelligence and ruthlessness. it’s the logical conclusion, right?

however. an alternative came up to me that I can’t stop thinking about: what if both cosmo and anti cosmo are the most powerful of their kind, but it’s the way their magic manifests where the difference lies?

cosmo’s magic is loud and colorful and chaotic. exploding fairy world when he was born made a whole lot of property damage but didn’t actually kill anyone (which yeah, it’s a silly kids cartoon but personality wise it also makes sense because cosmo is a sweetie). by that logic, anti cosmo’s magic would be dark, swift and silent and deadly. it kills even light and sound: its destruction is more absolute

in other words: cosmo lives up to his name by being a star, and anti cosmo lives up to his by being a black hole

[meteoraolive]

Part 3 🪡🩸

★ in this Au, Timmy gets trapped in the other world (Fairy world but it's really Anti-fairy world), The Beldam here is represented by Cosmo, who is Anti Cosmo hiding his true identity to trick children into their world (Same with Wanda/Anti Wanda).

★Timmy's parents are neglectful and overworking so they don't pay that much attention to him, but they care for him, like Coraline's.

★ Wybie would be Hazel, i still don't know who the other neighbors should be. The ghost children are Chester, AJ and Chloe. The black cat it's just a black cat.

Been stressed lately so sketching these was good. If anyone wants to add to this Au is welcomed ✨👀✨

[matsaysyes]

The way my jaw dropped when we met Irep. I genuinely didn’t expect him to have a square head considering the other anti fairies didn’t have that.

His hair makes me laugh so hard. He looks funny and still sort of threatening at the same time?? I think it works for him though.

Seeing Peri and Dev fight again made me sad. They hadn’t been good for each other since the start but I still wanted it to work out for them.

I also didn’t expect to see them back together so soon after their fight in birthday takeover. Though, considering Peri quits in this episode it seems their reuniting was short-lived.

Seeing Hazel and Dev’s friendship be made officially over really made me sad too. I really wonder how this will be dealt with in future episodes; if at all. Especially the ending with Dev researching Anti-Fairies.

We know from the description of the finale that Dev and Irep will work together to take over fairy world but I’m curious to see how they address Dev and Peri’s relationship. Peri is still his fairy god parent after all.

I also really like how they kept Peri’s good and rule-following nature like he used to have in the original show. He just doesn’t have it in him to break Da Rules.

Also the good luck charms seen in the episode are presumably a reference to the on the episode “that old black magic” where they are used to combat anti-fairies giving the user bad luck on Friday the 13. That is such a niche reference that never really comes back up in the series so it’s cool to see it referenced here.

[foptbw]

Timmy: Yes! Yes! When I mention how no one really ever comments on the Odd Neighbor's hair I mention how it's like the Blue Couple's blue-ness. When I drew their headshots to show you guys I noticed how similar they are. Like similar hairstyles and same eye colors I don't think they are the ones preventing the Odd Neighbors to talk to me though because they are both very nice. The Blue Man is always rather sad looking. He reminds me a lot like AJ sometimes. Not that they are similar personality wise. But, sometimes Blue man looks at me with that same... sadness mixed with anger but not at me, that AJ does. AJ looks at me that way lots when I talk about fairies. Or when Im sad about not being able to remember stuff before. He talks a lot like the Green Neighbor if he had a British accent! Sometimes he lectures me like when I fell ah sleep outside when it was raining. He sighs lots and lots. He acts like he's super duper smart and he is really really smart. But I notice sometimes he acts like he's smarter than he really is. Sometimes he sounds just like the green neighbor actually! But that's like super duper rare. Only sometimes when he's happy and saying goodbye to me. The Blue Lady is very silly. She sounds a lot like the pink neighbor actually but with a southern accent! It's really cute! When she appears she always ends up making me giggle with her silliness! Her name is not Clarice but The Blue Man sometimes accidentally calls her that. She corrects him it's Anti, but my head starts to hurt and everything gets static-y so I don't know her full name. And when she calls The Blue Man Anti, the static-y headache happens so I don't know his name either. For Halloween or Friday 13ths I wear black paper crown and bat wings. Cuz they always visit me on Friday 13ths. It's ah day I always see them! This last Friday the 13th someone else came with them. He said his name used to be something but it caused that static headache, but he changed his name to Irep. I don't like him as much as his mom and dad. He's not that bad. But he talks about a Peri a lot. I think maybe he has a crush on him or something. He goes on and on about how much Peri sucks and how hes better. But, I know sometimes when people think their crush wont like them back they act mean to or about their crush. When I've tried to ask what they are, the static headache stops me from hearing them explain. It's really frustrating! But The Blue Lady and Blue Man are always really nice. The Blue Lady says it's not my fault. She knows why and what is the cause of the static headache but everytime she tells me the static headache blocks her talking out. She often says things that trigger the static headaches the mostest. The Blue Man tells me that when they leave that the headache will go away. He was shocked when I remembered them when they helped me the second time after the umbrella. He thought that the static would result in me forgetting their visits after they left. But I didn't! That's why they always visit me on Friday the 13th and sometimes Halloween!

[respectthepetty]

I'm glad Yao Shun Yu's mom was rude to rich man president (Xia Shang Zhou), since rich man president's mom was rude to him in the series!

Anon, this is months late, but I was waiting to give you a fun fact about Shun Yu's mom -

She's the producer of ALL the VBL/Vidol shows, the executive producer of We Best Love 1 & 2 and My Tooth Your Love, and the screenwriter for Unknown.

Her name is Cai Fei Qiao and basically, she is fucking amazing! Also, she acted in (and I believe wrote the screenplays for) ALL of the VBL's series:

The mom in You Are Mine

The ghost in Stay by My Side

The Seventh Fairy (with Dong Yong) in VIP Only

The bumper car worker in Anti Reset

She worked on a 2013 show with Sam Lin, so when We Best Love came up, she personally asked him to join the series because she felt he could convey the emotional range needed for the show (drunk kiss, yes!), and she also played an instructor in that series.

You know the scene!

EDIT: @thisonelikesaliens informed me she played the aunt in My Tooth Your Love, which she produced (woman in black on the right).

And I'm sure she played a role in Unknown since she wrote the screenplay for it based on the novel (and did a damn good job of it), but I haven't been able to spot her . . . yet.

She is also working on a second set of VBL/Vidol series, so I'm sure we are going to see this man again since he has already been in two of her series.

She recently did an interview giving more details about the upcoming series, and someone on Reddit was kind enough to translate some bits, but here is the original Japanese interview for anyone interested.

So, everyone, thank Cai Fei Qiao for bringing us our favorite Taiwanese BLs!

[mellonieee]

Mellonie does FOP + A New Wish Analysis: 1

This is what a week of AC and Antifairy brainrot has led to. After this I think I’m going to actually watch through the entire original series from the Oh Yeah! Shorts all the way to Season 10. (Hopefully I wont hate it too much.) And then rewatch ANW again once it hits streaming for the full FOP experience. And also so I could maybe do more of this analysis stuff, its fun.

Plans for later aside, this and any I do in the future, will only use episodes the character actually appears in, and not ones that they are merely mentioned in. Its also important to note that I likely wont use all the episodes the Character appears in.

That old black magic is the introduction to Anti-Cosmo, Anti-Wanda, and the Anti-Fairies as a whole. They’re described as “Regular Fairies, but anti.”

This episode establishes a few things:

1.Fairy magic cannot interfere with Anti-fairy magic.

2.On Friday the 13th, Antifairies escape from Fairyworld and cause bad luck. Antifairies are naturally drawn to anything that triggers bad luck to happen.

3.Antifairies can only be seen by humans with anti-fairy goggles.

4.Antifairies are opposites of their fairy counterpart in personality. AW is “incredibly stupid and eats with her feet.” AC is “not an idiot, in any matter once so ever.”

But what’s really interesting about this episode is what Jorgen and Anti-Cosmo have to say about the anti-fairies.

“No one is allowed in Anti-fairy world!”

“You see, we’ve been trapped behind that blasted barrier for centuries.”

Jorgen, you cant just imprison a whole group without expecting any problems. Its no wonder they wanted to escape so badly. Is causing bad luck something, well, bad, enough to warrant the imprisonment of an entire race? The anti-fairies arent good at all, obviously, but they are biologically made to thrive off of bad luck and negative energy. This really muddies the waters when it comes to seeing this as a solely ‘black and white’ situation. Most, but not all, of what AC does is for the antifairies. He’s evil and chaotic by nature, but he’s not evil evil, yknow.

There isnt really anything else noteworthy to say about that old black magic outside of this, but I did notice that AC knew Timmy’s name despite the fact he never met him before that point, somehow. I merely brush it off as a minor goof and just figure AC mustve made a lucky (haha) guess, but if you want a crazy theory to explain it, then maybe anti-fairies share vague recollections or memories with their fairy counterparts. I dont actually think thats true, but theres your food for thought.

The second appearance of the antifairies, The Gland Plan instantly ditches the entire ‘antifairy goggles’ thing, which is honestly for the better, even if I do think it made anti-fairies more unique. They are sadly never getting the invisibilty thing back.

This episode establishes that the faggigly gland is a special organ in a fairies body that allows the fairy to change shape, and that both fairies and anti-fairies have one. Fairy biology in general is really questionable, especially if you factor in the angel forms from A New Wish, but thats a topic for another day.

A few things to note:

1.This is the start of that “Hello, Clarice.” quote that AC and Foop/Irep use. Its a reference to Silence of the Lambs but its a misquote anyway because Lecter never even says hello to Clarice.

2.AC claims that he cant see a thing without his monocle. If he isnt lying about that and isnt using the monocle only as a symbol of prestige, then he has really terrible eyesight and is most likely completely blind in one eye.

3.Despite AC calling his wife a twit, he prefaces it by saying that he loves her very much. Most instances of AC talking to his wife does include him being typically annoyed when she messes with his plans, but outside of that he acts courteous towards her. (“Chin up, my beloved Anti-Wanda! Your savior, Anti-Cosmo, will have you all free presently!”)

4.The more questionable line is when Anti-Cosmo and Cosmo are having the operation and AC claims that if he does live, Cosmo should take his wife. Needless to say, AC words things very poorly at times, but this statement does have them acknowledging that an anti-fairy and a fairy could hypothetically be with one another’s counterpart.

“Cosmo, old friend, since we both carry a piece of each other inside of us, I see no reason for us to do battle. But I warn you, don't look for me.”

AC doesnt hold that much ill-will towards Cosmo like how I figure most would expect him to. He seems to be fed up and annoyed by his counterpart’s foolishness, but he does not despise him.

Right as the episode ends, Timmy brings up the idea that maybe more than the faggigly glands got transplanted. There isnt much evidence to support this outside of the brief voice change Anti-Cosmo and Cosmo had, but I’m starting to think Timmy was right considering how Anti-Cosmo acts in A New Wish.

I dont know if AC and AW retired like Wanda and Cosmo did, but I feel like AC’s very obvious decline in intelligence is a likely theory as to why Irep now seems to be in charge of the anti-fairies as shown in A New Wish.

I frankly can’t see the New Wish Version of AC leading the antifairies compared to how he acted in the old show. Not when he now thinks leaving a cage unattended is a “good idea.” That isnt something AC would say at all if we’re going off of his original characterization. It’s interesting to think of a reason in-universe as to how he went from “not an idiot, in any matter once so ever.” to someone who definitely is not as smart as he use to be.

[chaosology]

invisible strings

Sam Kerr x reader

uses this+this request

warnings: underage drinking, gay pining, not proof read so u can call me out on grammar and i wont get my feelings hurt.

masterlist

September, 2003 - Perth, Australia

"Mum, it's so obvious she doesn't want me there!" You whined. Your mother was haphazardly chucking a soccer ball in a birthday bag, arranging the blue paper around it so it was semi-presentable. Bless her, but you knew Sam wouldn't care for the wrapping.

She had awkwardly handed you a party invitation after school that day as you plucked your bags off the racks.

"My mum said I had to invite a girl to come, sorry. There's good cake, though. It's ice cream."

She ran off almost as fast as she appeared, leaving you outside your Year 4 class alone. Why you? You weren't sporty at all, she could've at least invited one of the netball girls - they were always picking Sam for their teams, too. You were the anti-Sam, spending lunch with a small group of girls playing hopscotch and batting your eyes for the teacher's approval.

Black marker in your hand, you scribbled down a messy "happy birthday, Sammy K" in one of the white spaces on the ball. Your mum had taken you to Big W to choose one after school immediately after, given the late notice. You held it back, admiring your work. Would a heart be appropriate?

Yes.

You only turn 10 once, right? You added it front and centre on the ball, writing your name in the middle so she knew who it was from (though, she could probably tell a tween boy didn't make such an effort).

The party was, as expected, all boys. Sam's mother had greeted you warmly at the door, ushering you in with a comforting (and almost apologetic smile). Sam ran over excitedly to grab the gift bag off you, grabbing your arm to pull you over to the snacks table. You were introduced to all the other boys there, most of whom you knew from school.

You smiled shyly at all of them, spending most of the time sitting on the folded chairs outside while nibbling on some fairy bread and praying your mum would come get you. Sam ran around with the boys all afternoon, leaving you all alone with your thoughts. As it turned out, you had gotten the wrong type of football for Sam. You felt guilty for rushing at the shops, but Sam had hid the disappointment well, even complimenting your handwriting.

As the day came to an end, you were joined by Isaac. He was a friend of Sam's from an outside sports league, but had forgotten his asthma puffer and had to call it after two hours of straight footy. You talked most of the afternoon, complaining about your random 10 year old problems. You couldn't help noticing the way Sam came to talk to you more when she noticed Isaac there.

She probably just felt bad, you thought.

October, 2007 - Perth, Australia

Things had blossomed with Isaac. You remained friends for a few years, which eventually grew into something more romantic. He was your first boyfriend, and unfortunately your first love.

You were both invited to a party up in the hills. He had begged you to go, having become engrossed in the rumours of cruisers and beers being supplied by who-fucking-care's older brother. You had little interest, but his incessant nagging was beginning to piss you off, so you agreed.

Unfortunately as you both matured, Isaac changed. He was egotistical and big-headed, busy with AFL and making crude comments when he thought you weren't listening. It was hard not to see him in a different light, but sometimes you were offered a small glimpse at the small, sweet boy who sat out of breath next to you at the party.

You tugged on the hem of the sort black dress you were wearing, trying desperately hard to pull it further down your thigh. Isaac suggested "something sexy" for the party, much to your disagreement. You relented, and were now regretting it as you faced the chilly atmosphere of Perth's spring. He showed little interest in you while you sat next to him in on the couch, only passing you a beer and whispering "don't be lame" in your ear. Safe to say, the party kinda sucked.

You considered telling him you were going out front for air, but the way he was basically eye-fucking Karen Davies made you think twice. You wandered outside with teary eyes, Corona bottle in your hand as you breezed through the crowd of sweaty teenagers.

"Y/N?"

You turned, face to face with... Sam? She was older now, with slightly longer hair down to her shoulders and dressed in an oversized hoodie. Why was she giving you butterflies?

"Hey Sam," your voice came, "Sorry, just getting some air."

"Mind if I join?"

You motioned wordlessly for her to follow, her hand placed lightly on the small of your back as you navigated the halls to the front yard. God, you were so glad she couldn't see the red hot blush that painted your cheeks.

The two of you found yourselves sitting on the curb, legs stretched lazily out into the street.

"So Isaac's a dick now, 'ey?"

It was so nonchalant that it barely seemed hostile, Sam just took another swig from her bottle, grumbling when she noticed it was empty.

"You also don't have to drink the rest of that, you know? Doesn't make you lame or whatever."

You silently passed her the bottle, expecting for her to just chuck in a bin when she passed one next. However, she downed it in one go.

"Dickhead! I thought you were gonna throw it out! What if I wanted that later?" You laughed, playfully attempting to shove her off the curb. She only giggled in response, lightly shoving you back.

"Hey, I never got to say thanks for that soccer ball all those years ago," she started, "I actually play now. Mum 'n dad made me stop AFL, all the guys are bigger than me. But I actually really like soccer, your ball was the one I first used." She looked almost embarrassed confessing it, a small blush spreading across her face.

"Oh god, I remember that. Sorry, I think I scribbled all over it."

"Nah, it's cute- It's cool, sorry. It's cool, I liked it." She stammered, getting what looked like progressively more and more red.

"What are you up to now?" She said, awkwardly trying to change the subject.

"Oh I dunno, not much. Studying a lot, really. Isaac's been so odd lately so it's usually just me... It'd be cool to be a doctor, I think."

She looked up, eyebrows raised.

"No way! I always knew you'd do something like that, you were such a teacher's pet in primary school... The smartest, most nerdiest one there." She was back to her playful teasing now, and you found yourself slightly wishing that she'd flirt like this more.

What about Isaac? Were you a bad person? Why was Sam making you feel like this? Your head was starting to spin aggressively, the alcohol taking it's toll on your slight, 15 year old self. Sam grabbed your arm, rushing to hold back your hair as you crawled over to a bush, puking all over it. You felt too sick to be embarrassed.

Most of what you remember was her putting you in a taxi and slipping her phone number in your pocket. The next morning, you made sure to find the little note and stick it to your wall, staring longingly at the message written on it.

"Let's be friends - Sammy K"

You also broke up with Isaac.

April, 2014 - Perth / New York City

Y/N Y/L/N: haha sorry, is this the right Sam?? :D

Samantha Kerr: no way, yeah! how r u

Y/N Y/L/N: good! i'm so sorry i never messaged u after that party :( my mum never let me get a phone

↳ i wanted facebook to find u

Samantha Kerr: heheh no worries, what time is it for u rn?

Y/N Y/L/N: it's 9pm LOL aren't u here??

Samantha Kerr: nopeee :p i'm in new york

↳ i play soccer here! well for a bit cos i have to go back and forth

Y/N Y/L/N: no way, that's so sick... i'm jelly. stuck studying rn

Samantha Kerr: u haven't changed

Y/N Y/L/N: didn't u call me "teacher's pet" >:)

↳ med is super fun tho... come see me for sport injuries

Samantha Kerr: ...

Samantha Kerr: how's Isaac?

Y/N Y/L/N: omg Isaac haha, long gone... not my type

Samantha Kerr: ur type... not dickheads i'm guessing?

Y/N Y/L/N: *men

Samantha Kerr: LOL hahahaha same

↳ welcome to the better side

Y/N Y/L/N: ^_^

↳ how's things for u???

Samantha Kerr: heh yea good, the team here is super sick. NY is cool, lots of weird stuff... and christmas is so cold. my gf from here tho so she always makes fun of my accent :DDD

Y/N Y/L/N: ohh cool srry didn't know u had a gf... met thru soccer??

Samantha Kerr: yeh, we play for the same team. she's awesome

↳ someone @ home for u?

Y/N Y/L/N: haha no :/ someone but i don't think it'll work out

Samantha Kerr: aw that sucks,,, don't give up tho

↳ we should hang when i'm back next!

Y/N Y/L/N: that would be cool. i'd like that!

December, 2016 - Perth, Australia

She was always on your mind, but could she say the same of you? You and Sam had gotten so much closer over the years, texting 24/7 when either of you had the chance. She was returning back for Christmas and you were on your way to pick her up from the airport, helping to surprise to her family.

You hadn't been able to date properly since that conversation with Sam on the curb. Nobody else made your heart skip a beat like she did, and you found yourself yearning to feel her touch once again, even if it was brief. You didn't care. You comforted her when she went through her first serious break up, and she would stay on call for hours while you broke down about the pressures of med school. It felt like there was something pulling the two of you together, and god, you hoped she felt it too.

Standing at the International Arrivals gate was nerve-racking. Every flurry of passengers sent your nerves flying, eyes anxiously darting from person to person as you picked at your nails in anticipation. You were so nervous, you almost missed her.

She was finally here.

Her short hair was tied back, and the dark rings under her eyes proved how drained she was from the flight. She lugged a large, black suitcase with her, looking around until her eyes met yours.

You both rushed forward. She engulfed you in a warm hug that felt like... home?

No words were shared as you stood there in each other's embrace.

The car ride to Sam's house was comfortably silent, but you couldn't help but notice how Sam's hand had come to rest on your leg as you drove. It felt like it was on fire, but she didn't acknowledge it, sunglasses over her eyes as she looked tiredly out her window.

You were probably just reading into things, Sam admitted once that she's a really touchy person. You didn't want to lead yourself on.

Sam's family had invited you inside for the celebrations, surrounding you with all sorts of questions about schooling and your life. In a quiet moment, it was just you and her mother alone on the couch. Her siblings and dad were outside chatting at the barbecue, with the two of you remaining inside to escape the heat.

"She loves you, you know," her mother said matter-of-factly, "you love her too."

"Excuse me? I swear I-"

"Oh, don't be silly." She replied, leaning to hold your hand.

"That girl looks at you like you hung the stars. I get so many calls of Y/N this... Y/N that... She's besotted."

"I- I don't know what to say," you said, holding back the tears that threatened to spill, "was it that obvious?"

"Oh, no no. Don't worry. Us mother's have a way with things. Don't think yours doesn't see it too."

You laughed, raising your head to meet your eye. She released your hands, patting you on the knee as she walked off at the same time Sam conveniently entered. Nice one, Roxy.

"God... do you remember that birthday party I had?" She laughed, coming to sit next to you. She stretched her arms over the top of the couch, her fingertips only inches from where you were currently resting.

"How could I forget? Hey guys, this is Y/N that doesn't play footy - isn't that how you introduced me?"

She just laughed at your mock offence, small apologies leaving her mouth as she reminisced.

"I mean, it wasn't a lie."

"Oh fuck off, Kerr." You shoved her lightly, watching as her hand came to her chest to feign offence. You both fell quiet, meeting each other's eyes in a once again comfortable silence.

"Why me?"

Sam looked taken aback, her eyes down as she searched for an answer.

"Why not you?" She said, looking up. You could tell the mood had shifted as her eyes met yours, a hint of vulnerability across her face.

"I think... I think I always knew it was you."

"Sam-"

"No," she spoke softly, her hand coming to hold yours, "Just let me finish?"

You nodded.

"I can't really explain it, but there's just this pull. It feels like I can't stay away, you know? We always found a way back to each other, even after all these years. It's just- It's just always you"

The tears that were threatening to spill finally did as you pulled her close. You could taste the salty tears that left both your eyes as your lips met hers, a soft kiss that felt like it lasted a lifetime. Her hands came to hold the sides of your face, deepening the kiss until you were gasping for breath. Reluctantly, you pulled away and rested your forehead against hers.

"I think I love you, Y/N."

"I think I love you too, Sam."

July 14th, 2020 - London to Perth

"Have you got your comfy shoes, babe?"

A small "fuck!" echoed from your shared bedroom as your girlfriend scrambled to fish her shoes out from whatever pile she had thrown them in. Standing by the door, you watched as she stumbled forward and pulled her socks on, almost knocking over several pot plants as she did so. At 3am in the morning, she was not exactly a vision of grace and elegance.

The two of you had bounced around countries as Sam switched clubs, settling in the UK as she signed a contact with Chelsea. Your medical degree allowed a job almost anywhere and so you quickly found work at a nearby children's hospital, much to Sam's delight.

At the moment though, you were saying goodbye to your London apartment as you jetted back to your hometown. As far as you knew, there was no specific reason to be returning home, with Sam citing homesickness. You thought it suspicious as she was there only two months ago, but never bothered questioning it. You both missed Australia and eventually planned on moving back, but for now you were happy living a busy life in the UK.

Sam always had a thing about planes, as you came to learn. She was ok when they were completely in the air, always able to distract herself with some form of tv or movie (or sleeping pills), but you could tell by the way her knee was bouncing that this time would be no different.

"Hey, it's alright", you said, palm reaching across to settle her, "we'll be ok, these things are freaky safe now."

"I know. Logically I know it's fine but I just... I can't help it"

You only sighed, kissing her cheek and taking her hand in yours. The safety video played on the screens in front of you as you pulled her head to your shoulder, stroking her hair. Her body relaxed into yours as her breathing steadied, and you could feel her racing heart start finally slowing down.

She was drowsy from the early wake up and easily fell into a peaceful slumber. You prayed for no turbulence, admiring the few freckles and lines that were littered across her perfect face. She needed the rest, having been so anxious about this trip and her upcoming tournaments that the stress had almost permanently darkened under her eyes.

With her hand in yours, you soon followed her in sleep.

July 17th, 2020 - Perth, Australia

"I need to shake off the jetlag, wanna go for a walk?"

You turned suddenly as she called from the bathroom, walking out and drying her hair.

"Mum said they redid the park up the road, good field for soccer... We can practice some more if you'd like?" She asked, almost nervously. You had requested Sam start teaching you more about the game; a role she took very seriously. She was showing you all the tricks she'd learnt, even trying her hardest not to laugh when you fell flat on your ass several times in a row.

The two of you set off just before golden hour, navigating the streets of Fremantle to the park. Sam's hand was in yours the whole time, the other holding the soccer ball close to her hip - she was being so protective other the goddamn thing.

"I'll stand here, we'll just go back and forth until you get your confidence up."

She was taking several steps back away from you, positioning the ball at her feet before kicking it towards you.

"You know this is the one you gave me, right?"

You kicked it back, reciprocating.

"God, you're such a sap... Love you for it, though." She only laughed, winking as she did so. Even after 4 years, she still made you blush like you were 15.

The both of you continued, going though the motions until Sam decided to give it a forceful kick, landing it far behind you.

"Hey! What was that for?"

"Sorry, love. Rules of the game; she who missed must go fetch."

"That's not even- Oh, whatever"

You ran off as Sam followed behind you - why was she moving from her spot? That's when you noticed it.

"Hey dummy, this isn't even the ball I gave you - I used black maker on mine." You jokingly shouted back, picking it up to hold it by your side. "Got some fangirl groupies to replace me, huh? Can't believe you thought I used red marker."

She stood a few metres away from you, a small smirk on her face.

"Why don't you read it then, genius?"

You looked down, confused. What was she playing at?

Marry me?

It was written neatly in red marker, a giant heart below it - just like the one you first gifted Sam at her party all those years ago. You looked up, only to be met with the sight of Sam on one knee in front of you, a small blue box in her hands.

"Well?"

She had tears in her eyes, but her smirk remained.

You were still speechless, the red words echoing in your brain. She wanted you to marry her. She wanted you to be her wife. You sank to your knees to be level with her, gently grabbing her face to pull her in for a kiss.

You could feel her smiling against your lips, sliding the ring on your finger wordlessly as your mouth met hers.

[ckret2]

Guess who shows up in this chapter! With a ✨summer job✨!

Unlearning the "act like a rich snob" instinct is an ongoing process.

Here's "Bill is the Mystery Shack's extremely sulky prisoner" chapter 10, featuring: a haunted living doll, a trip to Greasy's, Bill acting like a playground bully, and the twins figuring out how they feel about another summer of triangle bullshit. Other chapters here.

####

Late in the morning, Mabel came home from a sleepover at Candy's. She went to the upstairs bathroom to shower.

The bathroom looked like a salon got in a fight with Bill's hair and won. The wet floor was coated in shorn golden locks like fallen soldiers. The air reeked of hair treatment chemicals and sick. There was a towel smeared with blood.

Maybe she'd brush her teeth downstairs and shower later.

She fished her toothbrush out of her sleepover bag, gingerly plucked the toothpaste from the sink, and retreated.

Bill's nest by the attic window seat was abandoned. In his place were half a dozen empty cans of hard cider and a sandwich with three bites taken out of it.

Mabel descended the stairs warily.

Soos's blanket of the anti-Bill zodiac no longer hung on the living room wall. 

Mabel moved on to the downstairs half-bath. She pulled aside the doorway curtain.

There, sitting in the dark, curled into a ball in the small space between the sink and the toilet, was a human shape. Draped over it was Soos's zodiac blanket. The head of the thing under the blanket lifted and blindly turned toward the sound of Mabel drawing the curtain. The zodiac was positioned just right so that the image of Bill Cipher covered the hidden face like a mask. The false Bill stared into Mabel's eyes.

Mabel quietly backed out of the bathroom. She let the curtain fall shut.

She stood in the hallway, hand to her chin, contemplating the omens she'd witnessed.

She said, "Something happened last night."

####

Less than a week into summer vacation, Dipper and Mabel had seen every single movie currently playing. (They'd even seen the R movies, after getting advice from Jeff on how to convincingly pull off the "two kids in a trench coat" gambit. Thompson made direct eye contact with Dipper in the theater lobby. He said nothing.)

They'd hung out with all their friends, had at least one meal over at each of their houses, and caught up on a school year's worth of gossip. Mabel had sleepovers nearly every night, alternating between Grenda's and Candy's houses. Even Dipper had voluntarily subjected himself to an evening of aggressive girliness in order to tag along for one of the sleepovers. (They'd probably only gotten permission because Grenda's mother assumed "Mabel's twin" must be a sister.)

They found a fairy ring in the forest that connected to a crop circle in Wiltshire, England. They discovered a crane game at the mall that was full of haunted dolls. They took Waddles for a walk and had to save him from a cult of feral flower children that wanted to sacrifice him to their love shack.

In other words, they did everything they could think of to avoid home.

When they were in the Mystery Shack, they were either in their bedroom or using the bathroom. They avoided the kitchen and living room as much as they could, and they fell silent when they heard the floor creaking outside their room, in case of an eavesdropper. They tiptoed whenever they had to go near Bill's nest by the attic window seat to reach the stairs. They grew accustomed to strange thuds and quickly cut-off arguments, although they never became comfortable with them. They got used to waking up afraid.

The plague of hair was new; but it was, they had to agree, exactly the kind of thing they expected at this point.

"You could collect some of the hair," Dipper's haunted porcelain doll suggested. "You could make a poppet. It would let you control him. I could teach you how. All you need is that hair, five black candles, a doll—"

"Nope," Dipper said. He was getting dressed in their bedroom alcove with the curtain drawn. "You're always trying to make more haunted dolls, Bartholomew, and the answer's always no!"

"It won't be haunted!" Bartholomew insisted. "Honest! I promise! Not initially. Until you use it to kill Bill."

"Listen, young man." Mabel scooped the porcelain doll up from the cardboard cradle she'd made for him. "We've told you, we can't kill Bill until we know it won't cause the apocalypse. Do you want the world to end?"

Bartholomew let out the longest, heaviest sigh that had ever come out of a doll with an unmoving face. "No. I don't."

"That's right. So reign in that bloodthirst, Barty!"

"Ugh. Fine."

"Good!" She set Bartholomew back down.

Dipper asked, "Could we use a poppet to control him in non-fatal ways, though?"

"Oh, yeah, sure. Torture it, restrain it, freeze it, burn it, cast spells on it, soak it in lemon juice, throw it in the dryer—hey, that one's really funny—"

Dipper pulled aside the curtain and looked at Mabel. "Maybe a poppet wouldn't be a bad idea. In case Bill tries anything."

They collected the biggest, healthiest lock of hair they could find off the bathroom floor, stuck it in a sandwich bag they found at the bottom of Dipper's backpack, stored the bag in the backpack, and left the house to look for brunch.

####

Dipper and Mabel had been putting off visiting Greasy's Diner as long as possible, hoping that at least Grunkle Stan could come along for their first visit of the summer, if not the whole Pines family; but after coping with another morning of Bill-related nonsense, and hearing from Soos that Stan and Ford had also been up half the night dealing with said nonsense and would probably sleep in, they decided they really needed to visit somewhere as comforting and familiar as possible. And so, off they went to Greasy's. Lazy Susan warmly greeted them, asked when Stan would come by, showed them to a booth, and then left them with a couple of menus and their glum thoughts.

"Dipper?" Mabel spun the laminated menu on the table top. "You remember how at the start of last summer, we just thought Grunkle Stan was some weird smelly old guy and we wanted to do anything except hang out with him?"

"Ugh, don't remind me. If this was last year, I'd be sweeping up dead hair instead of getting breakfast right now." He laughed weakly; but he knew that wasn't what Mabel was getting at. "This is even worse, isn't it."

She stopped spinning her menu to look across the table at Dipper. "We still haven't spent any real time with Grunkle Stan and Grunkle Ford, but this time I feel all guilty about it."

"I'm pretty sure they feel guilty about it, too."

"It's not their fault, though."

It wasn't Dipper and Mabel's fault, either, but pointing that out wouldn't help. Dipper felt like they'd callously abandoned their grunkles in Bill-infested territory while they ran off to have fun. The fact Stan and Ford kept telling the kids that they wanted them to have fun didn't lessen the feeling that they were traitors. "Grunkle Stan did say we could take a fishing trip once everyone's figured out the best... guard schedule."

"I know, but there's still..." Mabel waved a hand in vague circles. "All this. I almost feel like..."

She didn't want to say out loud that she wanted to go home; saying it would start tilting their course in that direction. If she said it, and if she found out that Dipper agreed, then it might come true. And nothing would be worse than that.

Dipper didn't want to say it, either. "This won't be all summer," he said. "Grunkle Ford's already got a weapon that can get rid of B—Goldie's body and whatever's inside of it, no matter if he's human or alien. It's just out of fuel. He only needs enough to take one shot, and then the rest of our summer goes back to normal. Right?"

Mabel took a moment too long to reply. "Right," she said. "It's that quantum jumbo-laser thing you told me about, right?"

"Yeah, the quantum destabilizer."

"How long will it take him to get the fuel it needs?" Mabel asked. "Is there anything we can do? I hate just having to... steer around everything while the grown-ups try to deal with it without us."

"Yeah. So do I."

Before Dipper had to admit that he didn't know what it would take to refuel the quantum destabilizer, someone approached the table. "Hey, I'll be your waitress this morning. Do you guys have any questions about the menu, or..." The waitress trailed off in horror as she registered her guests' faces. "Oh no."

Dipper and Mabel gaped. "Pacifica?!"

She hid her face behind her notebook. "Don't say anything. Do not say anything."

"You work here?" Mabel asked, followed immediately by Dipper, "You work?"

Pacifica's cheeks flushed. "Don't make a big deal out of it okay! I'm not, like, working-working! I'm just—making some pocket money, that's all!"

"That's working-working," Mabel said.

"Pacifica—" Dipper had to choke back a laugh at the absurd sight. She was wearing normal people clothes. She was wearing an apron. "What."

"Okay, look!" She slapped her notebook on the table. "It's not like I'm poor or anything? But after we built a smaller manor, my parents slashed my allowance—my wardrobe budget only covers a new summer/spring wardrobe instead of summer and spring wardrobes—and like... it's hard, okay? So I'm just—doing a few odd little gigs or whatever. To keep up with my hobbies! That's it."

Dryly, Dipper said, "Wow. Earning money if you want to buy things."

"It must be so hard." Mabel was doing a slightly less successful job of maintaining a poker face.

"Oh, whatever! You two just don't appreciate the value of hard work." Over Dipper and Mabel's giggles, Pacifica stuck her nose in the air and went on, "I'm investing in my future. I'm picking up part-time jobs while you two are spending your summer goofing off! It's like you're saying you don't want to have money."

Dipper and Mabel exchanged a glance. Mabel said, "Soos said he'll pay us $20 an hour to help in the gift shop."

"He what?!" Pacifica's jaw dropped. "Shut up! There is no way that cheesy tourist trap can afford those kinds of wages! Is it even legal for Soos to hire you! Aren't you, like, thirteen!"

Dipper said, "Aren't you thirteen?"

Pacifica huffed. "Never mind, I don't even care about your dumb job! This isn't even my main income stream. I've got this great modeling gig coming up with a huge paycheck, so—forget you you guys!" She flipped her hair and stomped off.

And immediately stomped back. "I forgot to take your orders."

"Pancakes." "Also pancakes."

"Fine." She re-flipped her hair and stomped off.

Mabel leaned across the table to whisper to Dipper, "Wow, the return of Rudy McSnootypants! Did she switch from acting snobby over being rich to acting snobby over being working class?"

"She's probably just embarrassed," Dipper said. "She's actually been pretty cool the last few months. When we play Bloodcraft together, she's... I mean, okay, during PVP matches she's the rudest person you've ever met, and she's the worst to healers—but she's nice enough outside of that."

"Oh, yeah." Mabel grinned. "Guess she never mentioned her new job while you guys were playing, huh?"

"Nope."

"You're probably right! She was nice when I talked to her about making her blanket. She even shipped new materials to me when she wanted alpaca yarn instead of acrylic."

Dipper laughed, "Wow, I can't believe Pacifica had to get a job just to afford your blanket."

"What can I say, I'm a master artisan!"

Pacifica returned, set down two plates of pancakes and two sodas, and said, "This is a bribe. Free drinks all summer if you don't tell anybody else about this. The only reason my friends don't know is because they wouldn't be caught dead here. They cannot find out."

Mabel considered the offer. "Free drinks and dessert."

Pacifica bounced a heel as she considered the offer. "Only out of the half-off day-old pie case."

"That sounds fair."

"Okay. Deal. Um, thanks." Pacifica turned to go, then paused. "Hey, Dipper. Your uncles don't use the Internet, right? Does that mean you won't be available for Bloodcraft this summer?"

"Soos finally got the shack online. He says the Internet goes out when the weather's eldritch, but I can borrow his computer for our guild's weekly raids. He understands how important it is."

Pacifica's eyes lit up. "Cool. Then I'll see you on raid night."

"Yeah! See you then."

Pacifica left to tend to another table, and Dipper said, "Yeah, she was just embarrassed. She's fine. ... Why are you smiling."

"Weekly raids? Am I gonna have to warn Kelsey about Pacifica—?"

"Mabel!" Dipper's face flushed. "Come on, we're not—! Worry about your own love life. We've almost been here a week, haven't you found a new crush yet?"

"I've decided love will find me when it finds me. For now, I'm focusing on my matchmaking services."

"Well! Make a match somewhere else."

"You're sooo red right now. Bop." Mabel leaned across the table to poke Dipper's nose, then dug into her pancakes. "You know... even with everything going on—I'm glad we're here. Think! If we'd gone home as soon as we found out we'd be stuck with him all summer, we'd never have found out Pacifica is a waitress. Or met Barty-Mew! Mew-mew. Meow."

"So that makes it worth it, huh?"

"Yes! Being around our friends! Being part of their lives again. I don't want to miss out on that because I'm—afraid. Do you?"

Dipper half smiled. "No. I don't. If we were home, I'd just be missing Gravity Falls, and still worrying about him. At least here, we can keep an eye on him."

"Yeah!" Mabel beamed. "We got off to a little bit of a rocky start, but this summer's gonna be great! And there's nothing he can do to stop it! Right?" She offered her fist.

"Right." Dipper fistbumped her.

####

Stan and Ford were worrying over coffee mugs in the kitchen when the door opened, but both their faces lit up when they saw Dipper and Mabel in the entryway. Stan said, "Hey, kids! Whaddaya doing back here?"

"Soos said you'd just gone out," Ford said. "We weren't expecting you back until this evening."

Mabel bounded into the kitchen. "We decided to hang out here today!" She hugged Stan and Ford in turn.

Stan looked between them in surprise. "Really? To do what?"

Mabel said, "Art project!" at the same time Dipper said, "Sorcery."

"I'm gonna sew a doll with Barty," Mabel said. "We'll figure out what to do with the rest of the day after that."

Dipper said, "Grunkle Ford, do you know anything about poppets?"

"Huh." He stroked his chin. "I'm familiar with the concept, but I've never encountered a working one myself. I probably can't tell you much you don't know yourself."

"That's okay." Dipper puffed his chest out. "After we've made one, maybe I can show you my research on them?"

Ford smiled. "Maybe you can. We still haven't compared our past year's research notes, have we? I just haven't been able to find time, with..." His smile faltered.

Firmly, Dipper said, "We'll make time."

"But later!" Mabel insisted, hanging off the kitchen doorframe by one hand, "C'mon, Dipper! Arts and witchcrafts!" She bounded up the attic stairs two at a time. Dipper followed after her.

Stan turned to Ford. "Who's Barty?" Ford shrugged.

Mabel's upward dash paused at the top of the stairs. The zodiac blanket-bedecked specter was back upstairs in his usual spot, curled up in the window seat, apparently trying to read a book through the gaps in the yarn.

But she quickly gathered her courage again. "Hey! Stinky!"

Bill turned to face her. "Yello?"

Mabel planted her hands on her hips. "I'm not afraid of you! There's nothing you can do to make me afraid of you ever again!"

The yarn triangle face stared at Mabel in unimpressed indifference. "Ouch. You're breaking my heart, Shooting Star."

"And I'll break your face if you ever try to hurt my family again!" She turned away from Bill, did her best approximation of Pacifica's dismissive hair flip, and flounced off to the bedroom.

"Pfff." Bill turned toward Dipper as he came up the stairs and asked wryly, "What did I do to warrant that? Have I not been minding my own business and avoiding you people intimidatingly enough?"

Dipper did a startled double-take—this was his first time seeing the zodiac blanket ghost—but he said, "No. No quippy banter. We're not doing that. Banter is for friendly chess club rivals, not attempted murderers."

"Oh, you joined the chess club?"

"Shut up." Dipper stomped after Mabel, stopped, and about-faced to squint at Bill's book. "Is that—? How did you get my journal!"

"I summoned a living shadow and tasked it with bringing me your worst and deepest secrets— Just kidding. You left it in the bathroom, genius."

Dipper must have taken it out of his backpack when he was looking for a baggie for the hair sample. "Give it back!"

Bill held out the book—and jerked it back when Dipper reached for it. "Too slow!" He held it over his head. 

"Hey! Bill!" Dipper jumped for the book. "I know martial arts!"

Bill got up on his knees to keep the book out of Dipper's range. "And I like pain! Fighting me will annoy you more than it'll hurt me!"

"Come on, man!" Dipper stuck his fingers in the blanket like a cat climbing a curtain as he tried to reach the book. He took a deep breath. "GRUNKLE FO—"

"Don't!" Bill shoved Dipper back.

Dipper fell to the ground, taking the blanket with him. He groaned—then froze, staring at the burns, the bandages, the raw red-rimmed eyes.

Until Bill shoved Dipper's journal in his face. "Sheesh, relax." He glared down at Dipper, eyes squinting unevenly, a hard smile forced onto his face—then he snatched back the blanket. "You can't take a joke." He turned the blanket in his hands until he'd found his face again, then pulled it back on.

Dipper gave him a dark look, but retreated after Mabel.

Ford climbed the stairs just high enough to shoot Bill a suspicious look.

Bill returned the stare, head cocked in a pantomime of wide-eyed innocence. "What?" He flung his hands in the air. "What! I'm just sitting here!"

Ford narrowed his eyes, but went back downstairs. 

Bill's gaze drifted again to the kids' door. "'Not afraid of me,' huh? Pfft." He turned to watch the world through the window. "Yeah. That could be useful."

####

"What do you think?" Mabel asked, plopping the Bill-shaped doll in front of Bartholomew for inspection. It looked like a fabric gingerbread man. It had X's for eyes and was sticking its tongue out. "I made his dress out of a sock!" 

"I guess it'll do," Bartholomew said. "The clothes could be nicer."

"Nice clothes are for nice people. He can deal with the sock dress." She considered her handiwork again, then said, "I guess a few more flowers on the dress wouldn't hurt." She rummaged in her craft supply basket for her yellow puffy fabric paint, and asked, "How's that pentagram coming, bro?"

"Just about finished." He set the last candle on the fifth corner of the chalk star he'd drawn between their beds, checked to make sure all the lines were connected, then pulled out a matchbook and lit the candles. "Okay, now what?"

Bartholomew said, "Now, we wait until the next full moon to start the binding ritual."

"When's that?"

"In about two weeks."

Dipper looked at the pentagram, looked at Bartholomew, and said, "So why am I setting this up right now?"

"That's what I've been wondering."

Dipper grumbled and started blowing out candles.

Mabel pulled out a couple balls of yellow yarn and asked, "Hey Dipper, can you get the hair baggie? I need to see which shade of yellow matches Bill's hair better."

"Sure." He rummaged around in his backpack. "Although if you want the poppet to be accurate, you might as well leave it bald." He looked at Bartholomew. "Does accuracy affect how well a poppet works?"

"Not much," Bartholomew said. "Give it the hair. Blondes are hot."

"You're a creep." Mabel threw a yarn ball at Bartholomew's face. "What do you mean, 'leave it bald'?"

Dipper said, "I saw under the blanket. Bill looks like he burned half his head."

"Whaaat?"

"Yeah, except for a few patches on the back of his head, he's almost totally bald. Not much of a surprise, considering what the bathroom looks like, but—yeah." He snorted. "He must have tried to copy Grunkle Ford's shaving technique."

Mabel laughed; but it quickly petered out. "So... he's hiding because he's embarrassed?"

"Guess so," Dipper said. "Huh. Wow. It's... kinda less creepy when you put it that way. Even Bill Cipher can have bad hair days, I guess."

"I guess so."

Bill was in Sweater Town. Mabel considered that, staring at the bald doll she'd made.

Then she grabbed her ball of yarn and started giving the doll hair.

[fountainpenguin]

Riddle watches New Wish - Post #27

The Battle of Big Wand

Part 2 of reacting to this episode (spoiler-free)!

Cosmo talking about the Big Wand going down: Better check with I.T. Hazel: Just I.T.? No fancy fairy name?

why is this so funny to me

Y'know... I've have a post in my drafts for ages that mocks Anti-Cosmo's castle entrance for not being wheelchair-friendly (because the road is covered in spikes). If he took over and then put spikes on this new road, I'm gonna lose it.

OH, I NAILED my "After thinking about it, this is my final answer" prediction. Dev is in the house! oh, good gravy.

This is the second time he's tried to be a king, and I think it's funny he hasn't tried to be a company president or anything. Not fantasy enough for him.

It's stupid funny to me that Dev just turned 10 and he's got impressive muscles when he flexes. what is this child doing- bench pressing solid gold??

We've been robbed of Dev wishing himself into one of the puzzle games he likes and getting buried under, like... Tetris blocks and having to claw his way out.

That might make a good 'fic; I feel like "wishing to be inside an app" is very correct for him.

??? whaaat does he have? He's got portable wishes of some kind? Is it a shooting star? oh, goodness. Let me think, let me think...

!! Crocker has these in the finale of Jimmy Timmy Power Hour 1. He throws them at the ground near fairy guards to poof them into animals. They're grenades. lmao, Dev got into the Fairy Armory.

Canonically, the Fairy Armory is the only place in Fairy World that still has power during outages, so... epic magic fight with weapons?? Ooooh, I hope so!

Irep is back, I knew it!! Part of me suspected he wouldn't be here because he's not really known for being a team player, but I'm glad he is :) Let's go Anti-Fairies!!

I'm delighted Anti-Cosmo isn't taking lead. Also, for some reason it's hilarious to me that Irep is focused on Hazel and not interested in addressing Cosmo or Wanda. He used to greet them as Auntie and Uncle, and now he's like "I don't need their approval or love."

Uh-oh... Has he sorted out his needy issues? If he's too old for naps and we can't bribe him with hugs, how will we defeat him??

I wanted to see if he uses their honoraries in "Fairly Odd Fairy Tales" (since he does it when he's being polite and I knew he was offering food). He doesn't, but I like how Wanda straight-up fed her nephew an apple that puts him to sleep until his true love kisses him, then looks dead at the viewer and says "And then we all lived happily ever after." Is the implication that no one will ever love him, so he's unconscious forever?? omg. Wanda's very black and white view of things is so incredibly funny to me, especially since she grew up in a mob family.

I'm excited to see Dev and the Anti-Fairies. Who would win: the species that invented papercuts, or a little boy who longs for lemonade?

Are you telling me Cosmo and Anti-Cosmo are BOTH intimidated by Irep now? Either this is about to be super funny, or they've switched.

Did Anti-Cosmo finally step up his parenting? Not out of the question; in Season 10, Foop was in time-out for putting spiders in his spaghetti.

(How ironic, considering Foop liked eating spiders).

I rewound and Cosmo jumps when the magic hits, before he sees Irep, so he's not necessarily afraid of him. Also, keeping my fingers crossed for anti-family interactions. I'm really looking forward to a face-off between Irep and Peri; their banter is my favorite and we didn't get much in "Best of Luck."

I'm so glad that despite changing his name, Irep presents himself with the same flair he always did. He is the same person...

omg, his little cufflinks. He's adorable.

For some reason, I've called him "posh British boy" in two previous posts, but... idk why, because he's literally never been posh and I know that. I'm glad he looks like his aesthetic is "bad boy with the tiniest detail of fancy."

I hope he's still friends with Sammy Sweetsparkle :) Maybe they're in a gang. I know there's 0 chance of Sammy being in this episode, but can you just imagine if Foop took out his wallet and there's a picture of Sammy in it.

Actually... if he's got a little metal circle there, I think that implies his jacket is closer to denim than leather. Lemme check......

OH, interesting... Yeah, he and Sammy don't match.

I don't say it enough, but it's really freakin' funny to me that Foop spends a distressing amount of "Certifiable Super Sitter" following Sammy or spying on Sammy and/or reacting to everything Sammy says. He's just Like That... Like, I enjoy the implication that of all the places Foop could go when his parents canonically left him unsupervised for the week, he likely chose to hit up the Turner place in spite of his hatred for Poof because Sammy is there. Silly.

Anyway...

Dev: Yeah, yeah, yeah... and Irep. Joint conquerors of Fairy World.

OMFG, ARE YOU KIDDING ME? Was I RIGHT that Anti-Cosmo isn't even at the takeover!? Local introvert hates leaving his house and never wanted Fairy World anyway; more at 11. I'll be there!!

Plot twist, Anti-Cosmo and Anti-Wanda don't actually show up in this episode because they're busy flirting while Irep's away.

I clocked the design aesthetic of the taken-over Fairy World as "This is Irep and Dev as partners; Anti-Cosmo wouldn't do this" so hard. crying. how did I do that. it's not getting better than this.

"Let's get DEV-ious!!"

dlkfgm, once again losing it at Dev using his first name rather than the "Dimm" part of his surname when he makes puns. He's a Dimmadome, but... he's kind of his own twig on the tree.

It is unreasonably funny to me that Irep's wand is so heavy considering he had massive muscles as a child after his Abracatraz imprisonment ("Spellementary School" & "Timmy's Secret Wish").

Also, I am FASCINATED by the decision to give Irep one little zipper tab that hangs off his jacket. Impeccable.

I love this team already. These are two people who are both known for:

- Coming from upper class families - Having parent-related abandonment issues - Not showing a lot of restraint - Only showing restraint when they've REALLY gone too far

Hmm... Oh boy, let me think. We know Dev's [previous] line was that he didn't like his dad shocking people's brains for money, with Dev having strained feelings even when he was trying to convince himself the shocks could be good ("You can help kids!") And he did feel bad about fighting with Hazel, though he's definitely Going Through the Wringer right now.

And Irep's line in the OG series is that he was totally down for:

- Tormenting his parents - Annihilating Crocker for not inviting him to his house party (whom he hilariously calls Denzel when he's mad at him) - Pointing his school's playground slide into the void - Sending Cosmo and Wanda on a dinner date to a black hole - Poof dying (despite the fact their lives were tied together)

- but he wouldn't allow anyone to harm Chloe, who finally introduced him to hugs.

He made it very clear he wasn't willing to face Vicky to save his own life, even on the verge of death, but he'd do it for her or for chicken cordon bleu. And she's not here, and we're all out of chicken cordon bleu. Uh-oh…

- Would Irep rate Hazel hugs 10/10? Inquiring minds need to know. - Is Dev bribing Irep with hugs? Or is Irep just here for the chaos and assurances that Dev's having more fun with him than Peri? - Is Irep bribing Dev with hugs? Are they pumping each other up with positive affirmations?? Go king; continue the healing cycle!

If Irep's parents show up, I hope he's on good terms with his mom, who used to pack chicken nuggets and anti-venom in his lunch box :)

Dev's faith in his ability to not fall off his O-pairs makes me nervous every time he's ever been onscreen.

His dad might let him down, but the O-pairs never have.

[ cnt'd - #Long post ]

All I've been thinking about for ages is an AU where Dev and Mikey Munroe (Bunsen Is a Beast) switch drones for a day, so Mikey's parents freak out that they can't monitor their son 24/7 and meanwhile, Dev just... can't get his dad's attention despite the two-way microphone and camera screen. Also, Mikey spends most of his time making noises into the O-pairs' fans. It's always been my headcanon that Mikey's parents installed the Buxaplenty's and Leadly's security systems (hence the buttons releasing different dogs & the lethal lightning bolts) since I think "ooh, rich people want us" helps justify why his parents are gone for months or years at a time when we know their job is designing home security, so basically... all the cool rich people use them. I actually have a WIP of Mikey and Remy playing near the Buxaplenty train tracks when they were little, but I never found a plot point strong enough to carry it to the end. Anyway, I've been waiting to see what the Dimmadomes have in terms of security, but it's... nothing yet. Plot twist, Dale has trust issues even with the people installing security?? ... I think he'd be friends with Mikey's parents. Maybe. Actually, I might need a 'fic about Dale having a meltdown when he goes home for the first time in 7 years and doesn't trust that Vicky won't sneak in to get him. He needs the world's best security team. It's two terrible parents afraid of literally everything. Yes, they ditched their kid for this. Don't worry about it. y'know... It's really messed up that Mikey's parents are terrified of everything, but they leave their 12-year-old home alone with the pets for months or years at a time, "but it's fine because they're spying on him 24/7 and sometimes give him gifts (like medicated wipes)." His dad is implied to have a fear of germs and I've always wondered if that plays into them not being anywhere near Mikey... Plot twist- We pull a "My Gym Partner's a Monkey" (where the reason we don't see Adam Lyon's parents is because they're severely allergic to animal hair and Adam has to thoroughly wash when he's home and they can't go to school events), but it's Mikey's parents fleeing Muckledunk because they're either allergic or afraid of Beasts. They left their son... Okay, I just checked my notes and I have a line here that says "Mikey's obsession with soft things like animals, beards, and blankets is probably because his parents never touch him." help??

Anyway, I think an AU where Dale hovers over Dev 24/7 and is still a terrible dad would be funny. Instead of neglect, it's obsession... Especially at this age since Dev's as old as Dale was when his trauma started.

... Is Dale putting distance between himself and Dev on purpose because Dev looks exactly like him and is now the age when Dale's life came crashing down? idk if Dale had access to mirrors back then, but that's gotta be weird.

crying at Irep waiting for his cue to pull Dev's flashbacks down from the top of the screen. They rehearsed this. Painfully in-character (In "Secret Wish," Foop claims he waited 10 minutes outside so he could burst in at a dramatic moment).

The way Irep twists his legs gives me Anti-Cosmo vibes.

Rare "Winn without cap" spotted in the wild.

Dev has the room oriented the wrong direction and in doing so, he forgot to include the door. Emotionally, he's stuck in this room. lmao.

Maybe it's a class that's not Guzman's since we know from "Multiverse of Jenkins" that these kids do attend other classes. But... Dev, what's goin' on, buddy?

INCREDIBLY funny to me that Bev sits directly in front of Dev? I gotta go back and fact-check that sometime. Has he been harboring his crush on her because she's right there? That's great!

??? If she DOESN'T sit there then I have to assume Dev is just so Bev-centric that he WANTS her to be there, and that's very funny. Go chase your sporty crush, rich boy. I support you.

Okay, I went back, and it seems his canon seat is between Bev and Kev (with Kev behind Hazel), but Kev vaporizes when we need to center Hazel and Dev onscreen at the same time (such as Dev faking sick and Hazel glaring at him). Oh my glob, he's another witch... Dev, embrace your ancestral witch-hunting for me, plz and ty. It would be funny... /checks my witch notes as a joke and screeches to a halt. Oh my goodness, I could finally get a Soil Tribe child in my roster... I have their magic down as "causes host to fade unnoticed into the background," and it would be very funny to do something magical with the child model. ??? On my first watch of "28 Puddings Later," I don't think I saw that scene of Dev falling over and losing his shades when the pudding throne collapses. Must've missed it while taking notes. That's cute.

I like how Dev's memories are 2D like the photos we've seen throughout the series. Also, Hazel's so dang cute.

I'm glad Dale's pants look the same in both the New Wish and old 2D style despite no FOP character ever wearing anything with that many dots.

I like that Dev's hair is much shinier than his dad's, implying Dale still has the dullness that comes with being soft instead of slick.

- I'm assuming this means either Dev's hair is gelled or he gets that from the maternal side of his family? - idk man, this is very in line with my "Dev's mom is a Leadly" headcanon... At this point, I can't NOT torment him with two very rich and extremely messed-up sides of his family... They both have extreme branding and weird fixations and funky buildings and run big businesses that have brought in incredible amounts of money and they like tech and call people the wrong names... do you see what I see...

I'm DELIGHTED Dale's hair curls up in the back. I've been so sad that he lost his tuft when he grew up. This is clever.

!!! oh yeah, Dale has his dad's stripe! Technically he and Dev both have the stripe, but I love the subtle differences in their hair. While collecting screenshots for an earlier post, I noticed the hair above their ears is combed in different directions, like this:

- with Dale showing the stripe much more clearly than Dev does. I like the implication that Dev's stripe is gold. That's really cute.

I checked, and the gold streak does seem to be in the place he has the Dimmadome family stripes in his 2D form (Eyebrow level). Neat!!

Aw, Irep's a big boy! And his hair grew out blue!! Parents' genes came out kickin'. I did wonder. I think it's funny his mustache and goatee are still black.

Despite losing the black hair, he's not yet immune from "Irep, are you sure one of your parents wasn't actually pixie?" allegations. This is stupid funny to me... In my Cloudlands AU, the Anti-Fairies are always dunking on him for having black hair like Anti-Cosmo's ex-wife, but no one can say anything because unlike Anti-Cosmo's first heir (Talon), Foop was born with the iris virus (colored eyes), so he's "been accepted by the nature spirits" and is heir apparent.

... Seeing this many colored eyes is giving me incredible amounts of anxiety, but it would not be appropriate to clarify why out of context. I like the guy with hair over his eyes and a big hat.

Is Irep leading the charge these days? Do the Anti-Fairies take orders from him?

Did Anti-Cosmo step down!? Because considering how much he hates conflict, I wouldn't be slightly surprised, omg...

I think it's funny that if Dev uncovers any official documents or watches memory clips that flashback to Irep's past crimes, he'd probably be like "Why is there no paper trail for this Irep guy? who tf is Foop?"

WAS that his experience of browsing the anti-web? I have to assume it was- I can't imagine Anti-Fairy World would cross his path without Foop's name coming up.

?? Considering that in my previous post, I said I couldn't think of any reason for Anti-Cosmo to desire taking over Fairy World unless he managed to score the earth and/or godkids out of it...

I'm so glad Dev just dropped "They have to take over Fairy World so they can rule Earth." slkdfj?? okay...

Irep: Now we can rule BOTH! Anti-Cosmo: That just sounds like scoring godkids with extra work.

THEM!! I am once again so intrigued by the lore that A.J. went into parascience and is following in Crocker's footsteps?? You've no idea how much I need to know what the A.J.-Crocker relationship is.

crying at Irep making a peace sign when he gets in front of the camera with Dev. Doesn't he do that in his profile pic on Dark Laser's phone? He's literally the same person he's always been. I missed him so much.

PLEASE do not tell me Dev's full name is Development "Devin" Dimmadome. The quote marks Dale puts around "Devin" are making me lose it.

Dale's partner: Honey, can you stop thinking about business for 5 minutes so we can pick a name for our son? Dale, who comes from a family that usually just slaps their name on things: I got this.

?? I'd LOVE to know what's going on with Dev's mom. Did she die in childbirth and had no say in naming her son, and Dale took over from there? Is she alive, but divorced from and/or passive around him?

Like... I have to assume she had the most exquisite prenatal care through a rich family like this, especially if we assume she also came from a wealthy family cough- Leadlys.

Holy flipping plot twist, does Dev not have a mom at all? He looks exactly like his extraordinarily wealthy dad. Was he just cloned so Dale could pass the business on someday? Did Dale just kinda buy him and wait for the surrogate to hand him over, and he never formed any attachment to him as a baby because he had the O-Pairs / au pairs raise him? lmao!!!

Traumatized beyond belief for 7 years by a girl his age so he trusts absolutely no one and never learned what a healthy relationship was like even with a partner, let alone his son. smh.

Actually, it's very funny to think of him and Vicky splitting up. Like, it was extremely toxic and not romantic in the slightest, but she straight-up identified him when she saw his face in "Operation: Birthday Takeback" even though logically, that would have been 70 years since she was last close to him. She probably knew him pretty well, especially since his hair has changed.

Timmy can't have frozen the timestream any earlier than Channel Chasers in Season 4 when he learns he'll lose Cosmo, Wanda, and his memories when he grows up, which is the reason he cites for freezing time in "Timmy's Secret Wish," and that was 50+ years. It's been 20 more on top of that for Dale to grow up and his son to turn 10. We know Vicky and Doug Dimmadome very, very occasionally crossed paths in later seasons (Vicky tries to sell him the Stryker Z in Season 3's "Engine Blocked").

If anyone cares, this (Season 3) is presumably where Dale grew up unless Doug took him to Dimmadelphia.

Like?? Something about the fact that Vicky and Dale are the same age is funny as heck to me. New Wish canon heavily implies Vicky's been taking advantage of Dale since they were 9, and they might've been friends once upon a time (despite the fact that in both New Wish and the OG series, she can never remember who the Dimmadomes are, lol).

There's no way Doug did a good job of looking for him, or Vicky would've turned him in for reward money. I wonder if Dale had a history of sneaking off to play with Vicky and just never came home one day.

Do you think that after her bossing him around for 7 years, Dale was really messed up and didn't know how to make choices for himself?

Oh, that's awful!! Who would write a 'fic about him running away to look for Vicky and beg her to take him back because he doesn't know how to be a person anymore and needs schedules and instruction? Who would do that?? I'm fascinated by their dark, twisted, and incredibly under-explained vibe. Haha, I'm in danger...

oh no, and Dev even told us his father relies on algorithms over his own thoughts, and we KNOW Dale was upset his publicity team said he should talk to people face to face instead of sending the O-Pairs or hiding behind holograms... A snarky Dev told us he thinks "talking to people isn't [Dale's] thing..." I'm connecting the dots...

hey wtf. does Dale have issues with scraping by in the dirt and dark with limited food and water and nothing to his name for 7 years and that's why he freaks out when he loses money? He can't handle the thought of not having a house??

Holy flip, I wish he'd communicate his trauma to his son, but I'm yelling that we keep seeing hints that he's withholding things from Dev. Like ?? Dale explains his thoughts all the time (in monologue fashion), but he's clearly keeping some things under wraps since Dev didn't have any concept for who Vicky was or why she knew his dad.

I genuinely think Dale doesn't want Dev to know the details. Dev didn't even seem to have a good grasp of why he isn't allowed lemonade, or at least that was my read considering how grumpy he was about it.

omg, this is horrible. who would write a 'fic about Dale taking his son camping and then slipping off to have a total meltdown where Dev won't see. who would do that.

Like, I think at this point they're so rich, you'd have to assume they're not at risk of losing everything if Dale took time off work, but we KNOW he's stuck on that schedule Vicky raised him with (working on Saturdays, which we see him do multiple times), and we KNOW he's always trying to claw his way up despite having the money to buy literally anything he could ever want.

And we KNOW Dale's big thing is that he loses his entire flippin' mind when the money slows down ("You still making sales?" / "Yes, but they're dropping, Dev!") and he's willing to stalk and hurt people to keep it coming in.

Y'know, this is continuing my theory that Doug Dimmadome is probably dead. I legit think Dale lost his support system (possibly around Dev's birthday considering how clingy he is about boots and says they came into his life on that day, plus the golden boots with the "In honor" plaque he has in his house). Daddy's not bailing him out of this one...

Lovely that Dale's first words to Dev after finding out he's taken over Fairy World are "My son." Oh, NOW he wants to talk...

I also find out my son is working with the fey and immediately drop his full legal name.

Why is Dale both the worst person alive and the only dad ever? I need to flatten him with a cruise liner (carnally).

Happy boy... (Dev, don't trust him.)

omfg, Irep's not buying this for a second.

?? I feel like it makes things WORSE that Dale seems at least a little aware of how upset Dev is about the boots? "I'm so proud of my son; it almost makes me want to throw away my boots." - There's no way he doesn't know he's been screwing with Dev's head for the last 5 months. omg.

- Hey, does Dale treat Dev this way because Doug made Dale feel like he was playing second fiddle to his giant hats?? I can't help but notice this whole city has a hat theme, yet Dale doesn't seem to care for hats at all... which is interesting, because we know Dimmadelphia existed way before Doug got here. Doug in my theory: /died 10 years ago Dale: If I touch Dad's hats or add boot statues around the city, he'll totally kill me. - ?? I guess the alt theory is that Dale put all the hat stuff up as memorials to his dad, which doesn't sound far-fetched since again... he keeps THIS in his house:

... Huh. I guess it could be a trophy for Dale instead of a memorial. That's another relevant time to use "In honor." What does it say about me that "omg his dad is dead and he bronzed his boots as a keepsake" was my first thought when I saw this in "Operation: Birthday Takeback" and not "Dale is successful of his own merit"? Obsessed with the implication that Dev's brand image is his sunglasses... Three Dimmadomes go down in history: The Hat, The Boots, and The Shades.

I still think Dale should have a gun. Not to be helpful; just to keep things spicy...

Please go to the Fairy Armory: the one place in Fairy World that canonically keeps power during blackouts. I am begging. I feel like his Southern daddy would want this for him. Doug had a flamethrower.

Is Dev still holding those magic grenades, and what would happen if someone tackled him in a hug?

SDLJKFSDKLFJSDF I'm on the floor. Did I call it? No way... But is Anti-Cosmo only going to show up now that Dev's giving godkids to Anti-Fairies??

Irep: Yo, I'm going to take over Fairy World; anyone want anything? Anti-Cosmo: The same thing I always want: a new child. Irep: wtf

Oh, all that time I spent speculating instead of actually watching the episode the night I started was so worth it. I was really nervous people would grump at me for how I see Anti-Cosmo, but now I feel like I was set up for a slam dunk.

Also, I like how Dev's taken over Jorgen's office. I didn't notice at first, but that's clever.

Dale is so proud despite the fact Dev taped his mouth shut and tossed him aside. That's so funny...

omg, this pit looks dark.

Will Dev torment his dad with lemonade? Is Dale going into the dark torture pit that swings open from the top like a trapdoor, which parallels his underground trauma to a T, or is that going too far?? Is Dev going to dump on his dad about Vicky? Will Dale freak out when he realizes he accidentally hired his abuser of 7 years to babysit his son? Will Dale be joining Club Redheads Who Didn't Get Mindwiped? (I hope not, because Vicky's in it). Will Dev bully his father while he has all this power and then wipe his mind?? So many questions. Find out next time...