#Bible Talk Podcast | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

mrsshabana · 4 months

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honestly i need a story time about the cult? also the link to that podcast, im intrigued now lol

𝐌𝐲 𝐞𝐱𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐧 𝐚 𝐫𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐠𝐢𝐨𝐮𝐬 𝐜𝐮𝐥𝐭

Ok children gather around. It's story time 🤓

Note: Now I won't provide a link because I talk about a lot of personal stuff including my name and location, and I don't want so many people having access to that. But I don't mind telling my story here.

Content warning: Mentions of religious trauma and eating disorders

Ok, so let me set the scene. I was 18 and moved out of my parents' house. I lived in a ghetto apartment near my university where I was studying art.

Now when I moved out my parents stopped talking to me. So I really felt alone, I had no family, no friends, and I was in a new place so I was very desperate to have a connection with someone. So really I was the perfect victim for a cult because I was vulnerable.

One day I was walking out of the mathematics building when a student stopped me and asked me if I would like to read the bible with her. She was a Korean international student and she was really nice so I was like sure why not. Now at this point, I wasn't super religious but I did consider myself a Christian. But I never knew the bible very well and my family was the kind of family that only went to church on easter and Christmas.

So anyway, I read the bible with her and she explained it to me. The way she explained the passage was insinuating that there was a female version of god. That was something I had never heard of before but it was interesting to me so I decided to come with her to her bible study.

Long story short it ended up being this organization called "The World Mission Society Church of God." I went to their church and spent hours with them every Wednesday and Saturday because they made me feel accepted. They welcomed me and became like my family which I didn't have at the time.

Something I really loved about them was that their church was so diverse. There were so many different kinds of people there, I really felt welcome. Because growing up churches seemed so segregated. I'm biracial, my mom is white and my dad is black so growing up we either went to the white church or the black church. And at both I felt like people would stare at me and my family and that I wasn't welcome there.

So it felt really nice to have such a diverse church where I felt truly welcomed. Anyway, I ended up making a lot of friends there and I stayed with them for about 6 months. Then I figured out they were actually a cult. It's a long story but I won't go into it because this isn't even the main part yet.

After leaving the World Mission Society I felt really lonely again because I lost the only friends and sense of belonging I had. But I had to just keep going.

Maybe about 3 months later this random Korean guy approached me on campus and he asked me if I'd like to participate in a survey thing about the bible. I was skeptical at first because my previous church had told me that every Korean person was a part of their church. (Which obviously is NOT true). But my mind was thinking, "Oh no, what if they are trying to get back to me."

But I decided that it's not right to assume that this man is a part of that cult just because he's Korean. So I agreed to participate in this survey and I gave him my phone number.

Basically, a professor was writing a book where she'd answer people's most common questions about the bible. And she was surveying students to collect questions for the book. It sounded pretty cool to me so I was very interested.

I met up with the professor at a Starbucks on campus and I answered her questions about things I've always wondered about the bible. We'll call this lady Anya.

During our meeting, I expressed to Anya how I felt discarded by god because of my previous cult experience. I felt like I wasn't worthy of his love and I was very ashamed of what I did. Because we would literally pray to a human man who claimed to be god. After leaving I knew that wasn't true, and I figured god no longer loved me for what I did.

Anya was so encouraging and kind. She told me that is it 100% untrue, and that god does love me. That he put me through that experience for a reason and it only made me stronger.

Then she offered to do some bible study lessons with me so I could learn things the right way and start to feel a little bit better about my situation. And of course, I agreed. I was desperate to redeem myself and make friends again.

So I started going to this bible study once a week. Which turned to twice a week. Which turned into me going to some woman's house to have lessons. We'll call this woman Cara.

Cara was from Korea and so was her husband, they were extremely nice and welcomed me into their home. They would feed me ramen and cool snacks, and I honestly felt like a part of their family. There were lots of people in this bible study too and I made a ton of friends.

So fast forward, I had been studying the bible with them for about a year now. And nothing crazy, I was learning about the parables of the bible and the meanings of all those things in the bible that make no sense. It was very informative and interesting but nothing outlandish.

They sit us down for this big "reveal" about who the 2nd coming of Jesus is. Now they hyped it up so much and they told us that we can't judge this person no matter what. This whole time I thought it was going to be someone crazy like Kanye West or something. But no, it was an old Korean man.

He seemed unassuming enough? I had never heard of him so I didn't know why they made such a big deal out of it.

Now at this point, you are probably thinking, "Why the hell would you fall for this again?" Listen, trust me I was frustrated with myself when I left but you have to understand these people love-bombed me when I had no one. They became my family when I had none. They lied to me for an entire year so I'd trust them and get close to them before they revealed who they really were.

And they were a church called Shincheonji.

And I had no problem accepting this because these people had been my family and my best friends for an entire year. They'd feed me, watch movies with me, do anything to help me out. So I trusted them wholeheartedly. But really I was just being brainwashed.

So after I found out that they were Shincheonji they put me in their group for advanced students. And I'd begin studying multiple times a week at Cara's house and Anya was always there too. I would join the twice-weekly sermons via zoom as well. Where one of the Korean tribe leaders would give a sermon about something. I was in the Mathias tribe by the way, though that doesn't really matter.

I would do so so much with them, we even all went on a road trip to Houston where the other branch was. They even got me a birthday cake and surprised me for my birthday too. It was honestly great, and I loved them a lot.

We were basically encouraged to recruit as many people as we can because if we don't they will go to hell. They put so much pressure on us for this. They'd say things like, "Don't you want to save them?" And I am a very empathetic person so I felt like omg I want to save everyone! But on the other hand, ever since I joined Shincheonji my anxiety and depression went through the roof. The pressure to save the entire world is a lot for a 21-year-old girl. So I never recruited anyone myself because I didn't want them to have to struggle with the same mental health issues I did when I joined.

I also had some physical health issues arise as well. Their teachings would always preach how "The word of god is all the food we need." How spiritual food was more important than physical food. And that really stuck with me, especially when I got food poisoning and I couldn't eat solid food for two weeks. Something about not eating made me feel good. Like I didn't even need food because the word of god was enough, so why not just not eat at all? Not eating felt like the only thing I could control, so I clung to it. And I became anorexic. Being with Shinchenji was the only time I was ever considered underweight.

Anyway, I have so many crazy stories to tell about my time with them but I'll save those for another day.

I had been with them for about two and a half years before I started to question things.

We got a new teacher from Korea to replace Cara because she was going to have a baby. And this new teacher was a lot different and a lot less loving and nurturing than Cara had been.

She had said some things that I didn't agree with, and it started putting some doubt in my mind.

Ok so, on a side note I used to work at the library at my school doing data entry in the basement. And I would listen to podcasts a lot throughout the day as I did my work.

One day I found an interesting podcast about cults, where the host would bring cult victims onto the show and they'd tell their story. Well I was listening to an episode about the Moonies and I thought to myself, "Huh, they sound very similar to Shincheonji in some ways..."

But I knew I could not think such thoughts and that if I did any research then the devil would poison me through the internet. And I needed to strengthen my spirit for even thinking of such a thing.

So I went to reddit, and I found a subreddit called r/Shincheonji. I was like, "Oh yes! Now I can talk to other Shincheonji members and we can strengthen each other's faith!"

But it wasn't a subreddit for believers. It was a subreddit for ex-members and people who were against Shincheonji.

And at this point, I had already seen enough to plant that seed of doubt in me. I read more and more even though Shincheonji warned me I'd be poisoned if I ever researched them. But I couldn't stop myself.

I went through so much inner turmoil, you guys have no idea. My reality was crumbling so hard and I felt like my world was ending. It's hard to explain, but I was so indoctrinated and brainwashed by this point. This really ruined me.

I had to mourn the loss of all of the family and friends I gained these past years. I would cry almost every night because I missed them, and it was so hard to accept that they never truly loved me at all. To be honest, I still think about some of them to this day and I hope they got out and found peace in their lives.

No one in my life had known I was a part of Shincheonji. My closest friends nor my family, who had slowly started talking to me again. But I had to tell someone so I told my childhood best friend, we'll call him Blaine.

I got in a Playstation party with Blaine and I just cried. I cried so so much, and he was so confused. But eventually, I told him everything. And he was really supportive and gave me no judgment at all.

My main issue was, how could I leave? I have quite literally been living a double life this entire time and not having that scared the shit out of me. But Blaine advised me to cut them off completely and just leave without saying anything. Because his concern was that if they got the chance to talk to me, they would most certainly be able to pull me back in. And I know them well enough to know this is true. So that's exactly what I did, I left and went cold turkey. I even went as far as changing my work schedule too.

And here's where things get creepy.

I hadn't spoken to them for about a week now, and I'm at work. I'm working as usual in the basement on the computers and low and behold, three girls walk in. Girls from my cult, girls that I was close to.

Now students aren't allowed to just waltz into this room so they had some big balls to do that. But the weird thing was, I had completely changed my schedule and I was working on a day I normally had off. They should have had no idea I was there.

But here they were, holding a large cup of boba from my favorite place. And in my favorite flavor too, winter milk cap with mango popping bubbles.

They came up to me and said, "Hey girl, we noticed you haven't been coming to worship lately. Is everything alright?"

I said, "Oh uh yeah everything's fine! I've just been super busy with work and a ton of projects for class..."

"Ok, well we got this for you," they handed me the boba, "We were hoping to talk to you. We can wait for you outside and talk to you when you get off."

I started panicking so I said, "My mom is actually picking me up as soon as I get off so I won't be able to, I'm sorry! Maybe another time though, I'll text you."

They were convinced by my response so they left. And boy did I RUN so fucking fast after I got off work. I even called Blaine so he could talk to me in case they came after me, but luckily they didn't and I got home ok.

He started yelling at me for drinking the boba saying, "YOU IDIOT! THEY PROBABLY POISONED IT!"

But hey, free boba is free boba.

Anyway, after that event I knew I had to text that girl and tell her I was deciding to leave Shinchenji because I didn't want them to show up at my job again or follow me around.

So I texted her, trying to be as nice as possible and explain to her that I just couldn't do it anymore. I told her how this affected my mental health and my physical health. How I developed an eating disorder from being in Shincheonji too.

Her response was really rude and condescending. She said my mental health issues and my eating disorder were my fault and the work of satan trying to blame them. She told me that once I leave I can never be accepted into heaven, that I'm damning myself to hell as well as all of my family members. I'll be honest, she made me feel incredibly guilty and selfish for leaving. Their teachings were still ingrained in me. But I knew that I could never return after everything, so I blocked her and never spoke to her again.

Oh yeah and that book the professor was writing in the beginning, that wasn't real and she wasn't a professor. It was just a ruse to lure students in.

I will admit I could never get their teachings out of my head. And to this day, even though I know they were wrong, a part of me believes I am going to hell for what I did and all of my family will suffer because of me. So now I can't even look at a bible, and I no longer consider myself religious.

And after this experience, I reached out to that cult podcast that helped me realize I was also in a cult, and I got an episode of my own where I got to tell my story.

So yeah haha that's my story!

Today only my close friends know, and I never told my parents. They still have no idea and honestly, I don't know if I will ever tell them.

I'm still really plagued by a lot of things they did, and my worldview has never been the same. My life has never been the same. But I've been cult free for about 2 years now so I'm just taking it one day at a time.

I'm sorry this was so long. But if you read the whole thing I want to say thank you, from the bottom of my heart, for reading my story. And if you are a college student, please be careful because cults like this are rampant on college campuses, especially in the U.S.

After leaving the cult, I needed something to obsess over, something to make me feel normal. And that was Gyutaro! And I gotta say, obsessing over him is much healthier than obsessing over the teachings of a cult.

Anyway, I want you all to know that this blog has been an escape for me and helped me to feel normal again after this experience. And I don't need a cult to make me feel loved anymore. Because I have all of you :)

#𝐑𝐞𝐩𝐥𝐢𝐞𝐬 ʚ♡ɞ #𝐑𝐚𝐦𝐛𝐥𝐞𝐬 ʚ♡ɞ #my experiences

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its-in-the-woods · 2 months

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Coyote Head - Part 9 - An Old Bible

master list

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7, Part 8,

Pairing: Cooper Howard x Lucy Maclean

Includes many other characters from Fallout

Synopsis: More hidden secrets are about to be spilled, as our couple moves closer together.

MINOR GET OUT. Rating/Warning: Animal/people death, dead animal mutilation, Alternative Universe, Slow Burn, Death, Aging, Family Feuding, Older Man/Younger Woman

Note: that I will not be spoiling any of the reading. So you have been warned. I will keep my tags relevant without spoiling what is happening in the story.

*thank you for waiting patiently, we finally have this mostly written out including how this ends. besides editing and fluffing it out a bit. 😀

Mark, Cooper's brother, was driving them back to the farm. Mark was slenderly built, with spiky black hair, his clothes neatly fitted. He looked shockingly like his brother but moved in more cat-like ways. The man was more than gracious, having brought his wife's, Ashley, SUV for a gentler ride home. He chatters with Cooper about the cattle and seed prices. Lucy was still feeling dazed, her hearing kept ringing, the nurse had assured them both that it should return soon. Lucy was not as sure it would actually come back, it was pulsing almost like a siren. Even the extra pain meds had done little to nothing to help. She rubs at her temples, hoping that sleep and a hot shower will alleviate some of the pressure.

Despite having been unconscious for the last two days Lucy still felt exhausted. Her body aches and protests at every bump and turn. She desperately wants to sleep, but the thought of closing her eyes in the car made her skin crawl. Memories were trying to crawl back, her Grandpa’s voice, Cooper screaming for her. She pushes those away, instead, she got an extra large coffee and drank it while trying to keep track of the two brother's conversation.

Mark talked fast and animated, while Cooper listened and added bits and pieces. Cooper was a decade older than Mark, Mark had bought a quarter section with his wife five years ago. The man was passionate and more than eager to get input from his older brother. Cooper, as always, was reassuring and willing to explain what he could to Mark. By the sounds of things, the fields would be dry enough to plant this week. Mark had tried unsuccessfully to convince Cooper that he would be fine tackling seeding alone. The eldest brother had stated that within the week he'd be out there helping. Family always came first, whether that was being picked up at the hospital or seeding fields.

Lucy making sure to offer help as well, she didn’t want to step on toes, but it felt like the right thing to do. Even if the idea of sitting behind the wheel of a tractor with nothing but her thoughts wasn't appealing. She mentally noted that she needed to find some podcasts to listen to. Preferably something not of the paranormal variety.

“Lucy, have you driven a seeder before?” Mark asks, brown eyes looking in the rearview mirror at her.

“Uh, I drove Tim's old International. But it's been a bit.” Lucy replies, trying to keep the shakiness out of her voice. Cooper's hand reaching behind the seat to pat her knee. “Sure with a little practice, I could learn.”

“Well if you're up for it we could sure use yah.” Mark continues, unswayed by Cooper’s sigh. “Usually-” The man was quiet for a moment, his eyes getting glassy, “Usually Dad -um- would be out with us. But -ah- I don't think he'll make it.”

“I would be happy to help,” Lucy replies, hoping to move the conversation away from the sore spot. “Pretty sure Harris and his kids are covered this year.”

The rest of the ride home is dotted with talks about different machinery, equipment maintenance, and how expensive everything was. Lucy adding that Dane was excellent on any equipment, Cooper agreed and mentioning that it would be good to have them on board. She felt a little selfish trying to keep Dane nearby, but really if they could have their hands full with work they enjoyed why not offer it? Even if it would only be for this harvest season.

It was getting close to five when they pulled into the Howard home, Lucy spotting Harris’ vehicles sitting in the drive. Her stomach knotted tight, she had briefly texted the man about being free of the hospital's confines. He had only replied that he would see her when she got there. Harris had never been one for texting, but with spotty reception on the highway, phone calls were not ideal. She tries to ease her racing mind, family was a good thing, though she was positive that dinner would be filled with many questions. That Lucy didn’t have answers to, she wasn’t even really sure she wanted to remember what had happened. The thought had her ears ringing again, trying to relax her jaw so she didn't break a tooth.

Cooper helps Lucy out, he isn’t completely on his feet either but between the two of them they manage to hobble towards the house. Whatever had happened was enough for both of them to be sore. Lucy happily leaning into the warmth of Cooper’s body, she wonders briefly if she’d get to share a bed with him tonight. Even if it was just to curl up against him, they were both adults after all.

A ruckus of cries came from the door, nearly sending Lucy toppling to the ground. As Mathias and Janey came running out towards them. The two small children nearly knocking them off their feet as they wrap themselves around Cooper. Lucy held on to make sure that he didn’t topple down.

“Daddy! Daddy!” Matthias sobs his head buried in the man’s stomach. “I just wanted you home.”

Cooper lets go of Lucy with a small smile before he drops himself onto the gravel. Mark comes up quickly to help keep Lucy on her feet, she gratefully leans on him. Her legs are threatening to give out with too much pressure. Mark may have been trim, but he was still strong enough to hold Lucy up with ease.

The kids piled on top of their Dad with happy tears, Cooper hugging both of his children close to his chest. Janey couldn’t even find words, just wrapping herself around one side of Cooper and crying. Lucy beams at the small family, her heart aching knowing that she could have been the one to lose him. Because of her, their Dad had been gone for two days, because of her his life had been turned upside down. Lucy couldn’t help gritting her teeth, vowing to do her best to keep him out of danger. Not that she could ever stop him from doing something he wanted to do.

Harris’ big voice echoes across the place as he comes over to give Lucy a near spine-breaking hug. Margie, not too far behind, tears in her eyes as she hugs her niece with her husband. Mark lets go to make his way towards the front entrance.

“You sure gave us a scare,” Margie cries, her hands cupping Lucy’s face. “Didn’t know what was gonna happen.”

Lucy let her own tears flow, as she held onto her family. Unable to find the words to properly convey how much it meant that she had them, that they were all still here. The reality that she could have lost her life became all that much clearer as she held onto both of them.

***

The dinner table was empty, Mark having gone home to his family not long ago. The kids have been tucked into bed for the night. Not without a lot of protests and promises that both Cooper and Lucy would still be there in the morning. Lucy had even stayed in the room long enough for Janey to fall asleep. She’d only known the kids for a short period of time, but the impact she had on both was clear. Now once again Lucy sat surrounded by the other adults of the family, some apple moonshine had been poured. A rare, but delicious treat. The alcohol's effects starting to relax Lucy enough to feel like she was not going to combust in her seat. She really didn’t want to answer questions, but there weren’t many options.

“Lucy, Cooper, know you’ve both had a wild few days,” Harris starts, happily taking another shallow glass of liquor. “But, I was hopin' maybe you guys might be able to fill in some details, did either of ya rmember much?”

Lucy shook her head, “I remember the dance, then drivin' home. I remember going inside and seeing the coyote and then hearing Tim.” She swallows, her throat going dry at the memory, “I heard his voice.”

She watches as everyone at the table’s face goes pale, Cooper’s hand covering hers. “T’was the same for me, but I didn’t hear Tim. I heard Barb. But it sounded wrong like it was comin’ outta radio. Then it got loud, so loud.”

A heavy silence falls around them as the others take in what they just heard. Harris looks at Marge, Richard, and Dorthy doing the same. As if they were silently deciding amongst themselves if they should believe them. Lucy looking at Cooper, squeezing his hand. He was doing his best to keep himself stone-faced, but Lucy could see the cracks. She desperately wanted to comfort him, tell him she was sorry, but knowing here was not the time or place.

“How did you know to come get us?” Lucy finally asks, not able to sit in the silence any longer. It was one of the few things she’d thought about asking since she woke up.

Harris swallows as all eyes turn to them, shifting in his seat as he looks at everyone. Margie glaring at him, her lips pursed, arms crossing her chest as she waits for her husband to reply. If looks could wound, she’d have cut him to ribbons.

“I didn’t know,” Harris states, Margie gets up and walks to the kitchen counter where her bag is. “I went to look for your Granddad’s bible,”

Lucy felt like she might throw up, Cooper’s whole body tensing. Harris continuing to keep secrets from her was a blow, even if it had saved them. She wishes Harris would be more honest about what he was doing.

“Now before punches are thrown, downright needed ones,” Harris replies putting his hands up, as Margie sits down with a small book in front of her. “I was going to tell you after the dance. At Sunday dinner. But I got this itchin’ feelin’ I needed to go and look for it now.” Cooper’s hand squeezes Lucy’s as his hazel eyes are set on Harris’. “I am glad I did, and I know I should have phoned.”

“Yes, he should have. Stubborn asshole.” Margie grumbles, her fingers tapping on the top of the book. “I gave him hell for ya Lucy. Man can be stupider than a steer some days. He found this, a few days after you had gathered the journals.”

Margie carefully passes the book, more of a ledge now that Lucy can see it clearly. It’s black, non-descript with worn pages poking out the side, and a silver script says 00-05 on the top right corner. Flipping it open the title page has her Grandfather’s name and phone number in the top left. Underneath it has: gains/losses for 2000-2005

“Now, it might not seem like much, Lucy,” Harris said quietly, everyone shuffling closer to take a look at the now coveted item. Lucy pushes it forward so more can see it. “But if you follow the dates, you’ll notice a few thin's. “

Lucy flipped open the page, counts of cows, calves, bulls, and steers listed. Then below the count of who went to slaughter, who stayed, which bulls were kept, and so on. As her eyes sweep lower, the pen color changes. It could almost be overlooked, going from black to a navy blue pen, but Lucy picks it up right away. Her Grandpa, like many of his generation, was a stickler for details. He won’t have switched pens without reason.

July, sixteenth, two thousand, beside it was a note fox killed four chickens

“The blue,” Lucy said looking up at Harris, her finger resting beside that. Dorothy puts on her reading glasses to take a closer look. “We never lost chickens to foxes.”

Harris nods, Richard's eyebrows scrunching, “I’ve seen Tim’s coops, could barely get in'em as human. Highly doubt a fox got through quarter-inch hardware cloth.”

“Flip to the next month,” Harris states, leaning back against the chair a bit. Lucy not liking that he seemed to have the book memorized by now. Why hadn’t he given her the book to begin with?

She worries at her lip but does what she asked, finger once again running down to the next off-colored line. Again black and then navy blue.

August fifteenth two thousand, two rabbits, wild

She flips over to the next page, now easily finding the different color.

September thirteen two thousands, coyote, attacked calf

Every month there are at least one, sometimes two, lines written in navy blue ink. The writing seemed slightly different, almost shaky.

“So,” Lucy looks around, unsure exactly what Harris was leaning towards. “What is it?”

“It’s the full moon and solstices,” Dorthoy spoke, her voice wavering slightly. Folding her glasses under her shaky hands. “They are all close to twenty-eight days apart.”

Lucy is flipping open her phone and searching for a full moon calendar. She looks at the website, and then at the ledger. Each date is almost exact. Some off by a day or two, but on or around the full moon.

“I am still lost,” Cooper adds, Lucy, letting him take a look at the book as she watches her Uncle and Aunt closely.

“I think he was bringin the animals to the forest,” Harris says, Margie’s looking like she might be sick. “I can’t be certain, but why else would he have it in a different color on or around the full moon?”

Lucy snorts, maybe it’s the alcohol or the lack of sleep, but the words out of Harris’ mouth seem ridiculous. “Like as a sacrifice? To the forest? Is that really what we are thinking here?”

More silence, Dorothy taking a deep drink from her glass, Lucy trying to see if anyone else agrees. How was this even possible? Yes, weird stuff was happening, but that didn’t mean her Grandfather should have been in a ward.

“This can’t be what we are thinking?” Lucy pushes, looking at all the people sitting at the table. Cooper doing the thing, his face lined with worry.

“Lucy,” Richard speaks up, “You and my son aren't the only ones that have heard voices. I also helped search for your Dad and Uncle. I and many others heard, not just their voices, but the voices of other dead loved ones. Most shrugged it off as the wind or exhaustion. But I saw the look in your Grandfather’s eyes, it was like he knew what it was. He was distraught, spendin more hours out there than anyone. Shirley had to drag him out of there almost every night. He wasn’t right for a long time after that.”

“He’d just lost his sons. Anyone would be unwell.” Lucy throws her hands up. “Doesn’t mean he was killing animals f-for what?”

“We don’t know,” Margie replies, voice quieting the room. “Why Harris went lookin for the bible. We want answers just as much as you do.”

“Your Grandad had an old bible, really old,” Harris adds, fiddling with his empty glass. “I am wonderin if there is more info in that. Maybe between the ledger, the journals, and the bible, we can figure out what is going on.”

Lucy finishes her drink, still in disbelief, how could any of this be possible? Her ears rung, the image of the dead and desiccated coyote on her bed standing out clear, her body aching. It was real, as real as any of this could be. Whether Lucy believed it or not, it was happening. Cooper’s hand grips hers as she tries to pull herself back into reality. Realizing her eyes have closed, swallowing as she forces herself to look around the table.

“Okay. We'll get it all together. Try to piece out it is, even if this does sound otherworldly.” Lucy sighs, rubbing at her tired eyes, she desperately needed sleep and some time to digest this all.

“Can we maybe pick this up tomorrow?” Cooper asks, his eyes still fixed on Lucy, his hand holding hers. Lucy wanted to lean against him and let the world drift away.

“I think that would be wise, it’s been a hard few days for everyone. “ Margie says, patting Harris’ hand. “Why don’t we'll come by tomorrow evening? Will gather our things and see what we can compile.”

“Sounds like a good plan. I know I could use the rest,” Richard gives a forced smile, as everyone begins to move around the room.

***

Lucy makes it upstairs, just barely, her whole body aches, the last month of terror catching up with her. She leans against the wall once upstairs, Cooper coming over to scoop her up. The way he easily carried her made her heart stutter, she wrapped her arms around his neck. Letting him carry her down to his room, she’d taken to sleeping in the spare room. Cooper wanted to keep things separate until they got to know each other better.

Tonight was different, something had changed between the two of them. Lucy wasn’t sure what it was, but they were interconnected like they were meant to find the other. It had taken them both being attacked by, well there wasn’t a name for it, to understand that connection. So when Cooper plops her down onto his bed, Lucy doesn’t make a fuss.

Cooper set about rolling down her socks, his hands are calloused but gentle. He was always so gentle with her, Lucy couldn’t help but wonder what it would be like for him to not be so gentle. Though, that would have to wait for another night when she was more conscious. Moonshine tended to have that effect on her.

“Do you want me t'sleep in the spare?” Cooper asks, having taken off his socks as well, sitting down beside her. Lucy wraps her arms around his waist, causing Cooper to chuckle. “Would ya mind if I divested some of my clothes, or would ya rather me stay clothed.”

“I don’t mind, it’s your bed, you should be comfortable. I am personally going to remove this constraining bra. As well as my pants,” Lucy chuckles, as she does her best to sit up. The world spinning, Cooper steadies her, his hands working under her shirt. She feels him pause and nods her head, as he carefully unclasps her bra. Lucy sighs as she flings the offending item out from under her shirt. Both giggling at the ridiculous act, as Cooper stands up.

“I am sorry Cooper,” Lucy says, still swaying a bit, the sadness in her stomach still hoovering at the surface. “About Barb. I didn’t know you’d heard her voice.”

Cooper freezes where he is stood, turning to look at her, “It wasn’t her, I wish it was. But I know it in my heart it wasn’t her.” He tapped his fingers over his heart.

Lucy tries to stand, wanting to comfort him, and fails, falling back onto the bed. Maybe it would be best if she just stayed clothed. Cooper comes over crouching between her legs, his hands resting gently on her thighs.

“I feel like I’ve turned your world upside down.” Lucy sighs, eyes closing, her words feeling meaningless against the tide of pain. “I don’t wish to cause you more pain, Cooper.”

Cooper chuckles, “You do anything but that, Lucy.” He rests his head against her thigh, Lucy’s fingers naturally running up into his hair.”

“I seem to be, either too drunk or too tired to remove my pants.” Lucy sighs, covering her face at the ridiculousness of the situation she has found herself in.

“Do you want’em off?” Cooper asks, Lucy, peeking through her fingers. Cooper kisses the top of her thigh, and the room is very warm all of a sudden.

“If ya don’t mind helpin'me? No funny business.” Lucy teases, Cooper giving her a soft smile before his hand skillfully had her pants unbuttoned and unzipped. He moves back down so he can take the bottoms and carefully pull them off her legs. Lucy lifted her butt a bit so that they slid off. Slumping into the cool blankets now that she was free of most of her clothes.

Lucy lays on her side, watching Cooper pull his shirt over his head in one fluid motion. The way his back is shadowed in the late evening light makes her body ache. His pants go next, and Lucy is really regretting drinking as much as she did. The man was like something made out of stone.

She wiggles herself up and flips the blankets up, crawling in and patting the bed beside her. Cooper crawls in without a fuss, before pulling the blanket up and around them. He wraps his arm around her so that she is snuggled against him.

“No funny business?” Cooper smirked, his eyes glancing sideways at her, leaning down and kissing her gently.

Lucy giggles, wiggling herself so she is right next to him, her body pressing up against his. Kissing his collarbone gently as her leg hooked over his thigh.

“You’re too good to me, Cooper Howard,” Lucy replies, settling herself comfortably as her fingertips trace unknown symbols over his chest.

Cooper wrapped her up close to him, kissing her forehead, “I could say the same to you, Ms. MacLean.”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

TEN IS HERE

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