#COME ON NOW HOW CAN YOU HAVE BYLER DOUBT WHEN ALL THAT HAPPENED?

[chirpsythismorning]

Imagine having byler doubt when the CGI hearts exist

[v-i-r-i-d-i-a-n]

(I’m using caps, I am not upset JUST PASSIONATE)

This is an Eleven character rant/study, I have a really hard time putting my thoughts into words so I’m sorry if I talk in a circle a lot but I am simply ranting

Y’ALL DONT GET IT

ELS CHARACTER ARC DOESNT MAKE SENSE IF SHE STAYS WITH MIKE

AND IM GONNA TALK ABOUT IT BECAUSE I FEEL LIKE A LOT OF Y’ALL FORGET THAT IF BYLER DOES HAPPEN SHES GONNA PLAY A BIG PART IN THE STORY CUS YK SHES MIKES GIRLFRIEND AND THEIR RELATIONSHIP HAS TO END FOR THAT TO BECOME AN ACTUAL THING

From the moment we’re introduced to El we know that her character arc is about personal freedom, being free, being her own person, she escapes from the lab where she has no freedom and has never had the ability to make her own decisions, that is THE FIRST thing we learn about El; Is that she is searching for freedom. We know El has never had the chance or has even been given the right to choose what happens in her life. We learn that throughout season one, with her being uneducated on the simplest things, not knowing what privacy is and in the end not really wanting privacy, and then she “dies” finally choosing something for herself.

Even in S2 we see her yet again, being in a situation where she does not have freedom. Living with Hopper was like a prison, it reminded El of living in the lab, it reminded her that she did not have control over her life, THAT YET AGAIN the government was deciding what she could and couldn’t do. Even if not directly, the reason Hopper wouldn’t let her out of the house was because the lab was actively searching for her. El didn’t have freedom when living with Hopper.

And then we see her finally choose something for herself, she leaves the house despite it not being safe because she doesn’t want to be controlled anymore, she wants to have freedom. And then someone see’s her and Hopper yells and takes away the ONE THING that connected her to the outside world and she runs away. To be free, to try and finally get some answers for herself. To have the freedom to create her own opinions on information she doesn’t know yet.

And then we meet Kali, and it’s the free-est El has probably EVER felt in her entire life. AND THEN Kali manipulates her, and tries to get her to do something she doesn’t want to do. SHE YET AGAIN DOESNT HAVE TRUE FREEDOM BECAUSE SOMEONE ELSE IS TRYING TO DICTATE HER LIFE, TO USE HER AS A WEAPON

IN S3 SHES ABLE TO SEE MIKE AND GET OUT OF THE HOUSE SOMETIMES BUT SHE STILL ISNT FREE BECAUSE WE KNOW THAT SHE REALLY ONLY SPENDS TIME WITH MIKE AND MIKE ALWAYS COMES TO HOPPERS HOUSE WE KNOW EL DOESNT KNOW WHO SHE IS, THAT SHE DOESNT TRY AND DISCOVER HERSELF FOR AT LEAST 6 MONTHS AFTER THE EVENTS OF S2

El’s arc in S3 is, again, about self discovery (freedom), finally having a sense of being able to make her own choices, trying to figure herself out as a person, OUTSIDE of Mike and Hopper. Figuring out what she likes and doesn’t like and how to have fun and how to be a kid with Max.

EVEN IN S4 EL HAD A TASTE OF FREEDOM AND THEN GETS SWEPT AWAY BY THE LAB ONCE AGAIN. WITHOUT LEARNING TRULY WHO SHE IS YET

Now I know a lot of Mike and El shippers would argue that being with Mike was something that El actively chose on her own but you have to understand how their relationship even came to be to know that’s absolute bullshit

El didn’t know what a friend was when she escaped the lab, and I can tell you FOR SURE that she didn’t understand what Mike meant when he kissed her. Maybe on a surface level, but not really fully understanding it all, I highly doubt Papa taught El ANYTHING about relationships. So this idea of romance was thrust upon her when she had no real idea what it was

The only understanding of romance El had was that of the shows she watched in Hoppers cabin, and we all know that was a dolled up fantasy version of love, but it’s the only example El was ever given, so even if she didn’t fully understand love she thought that was what people did. I don’t know if El ever loved Mike, or if it was hormones, or just simply because she thought “oh, this is what people do. This is what Mike meant. Well, it doesn’t seem too bad. And I’m supposed to do it right? That’s how I’m supposed to act? That’s how people act. So that’s how I will act.” And maybe El did really like Mike, or maybe she confused friendship for love. That I’m not really sure.

But I do know one thing, and that’s that being in a relationship is not healthy for El. Even at this point El doesn’t know who she is as a person, she’s still figuring it out. She’s still searching for that freedom her ENTIRE arc has been about.

And I know a million people have already talked about how Mikes arc surrounds needing to be needed, and that, at its bare bones, is not healthy for El. She does not need him. Maybe at first she did, in S1, when she had just escaped from the lab and needed some sort of guidance, but it was the same way she needed Max, she needed someone to guide her through the basics of being a person..But she does not need him now.

At least not in the relationship type of way. I THINK MIKE AND EL COULD BE REALLY GOOD FRIENDS. But it’s not healthy for either of them to stay together.

Because El needs to find herself outside of someone else, outside of Hopper, outside of Joyce, outside of Max, outside of Mike.

And being in a relationship does not allow her to do that.

Might rant about how Mike staying with El also doesn’t work for him as well idk

I WROTE THIS INSTEAD OF DOING SCHOOL SO SORRY IF ITS RUSHED

[elephantshoetoo]

Excerpt from "Road Tripping":

(Chapter 8 of The Byler Files, vol. 3, by ElephantShoe. Now posted on AO3.)

(Mike makes a soft growling sound reminiscent of purring as he rubs his cheek against Will's hair, his breath quickly growing thick and throaty.)

WILL (chuckling): Okay. Let's… maybe not start this again. 

MIKE: Okaaay, then... what can we do that isn't remotely sexy? 

WILL: Um…

(They look around, trying to think of something but coming up blank.)

MIKE (hesitant): Do you, uh… wanna, maybe, um, talk about tomorrow? (wincing) About… seeing your dad? 

WILL (nodding grimly): That'll do it, yup. (pause) I dunno, though. I’ve been trying not to think about him. 

MIKE: Oh. Sorry.

(Will props himself up on one elbow, his other hand still on Mike's stomach.)

WILL: No, it's okay. It's probably better if I have some kind of plan heading in. Once I get there, I'm gonna totally forget everything I've ever wanted to say to him. 

MIKE: Are you going to tell him? About… y’know… you, and… and us? 

WILL: I didn't think I ever would. Honestly, I didn't think I'd ever have to speak to him again. But… I have a feeling he'll know just by looking at me. He's always assumed that about me anyway. Still… I'm not eager to give him the satisfaction of knowing he was right.

MIKE: Yeah. 

WILL: I mean, that is the main reason he treated me like crap all those years – he knew before I did, and… he hated me for it. 

MIKE: That is just… (Mike shakes his head, his expression pained.) so fucking horrible. To do that to your own kid…? You deserve way better than him. 

WILL: I know.

(Mike peers deep into his eyes and speaks with the soft, tender voice he uses only for Will.)

MIKE: Whatever he says to you, just remember… you are a good person. Okay? You are kind, and smart, and… brave…

WILL: The way he sees it… being kind is a weakness.

MIKE: Then he's an idiot. Will. You are the strongest person I know. And the kindest. 

(Will sits up, surprised that Mike thinks so.)

WILL: Really…? I'm the strongest person you know? 

(Mike sits up, shocked that Will doesn't know this already.)

MIKE: Yeah! Of course you are. You’ve been through so much. You survived the freaking Upside Down, for fuck’s sake! I doubt he could do that. 

WILL: Probably not…

MIKE (emphatically, taking both of Will's hands in his): You are amazing, Will. And I. Love you. Nothing he says or does will ever change that. Ever. 

WILL (welling up): Okay. 

MIKE (whispering): You deserve good things. Don't forget that, okay? 

WILL: I won't. I can't – you never let me. 

MIKE: And I never will. (with more confidence than earlier) It'll be okay tomorrow, whatever happens. I'm right there with you. 

WILL: I know. (He smiles at Mike.) I brought the Paladin necklace to wear, so I’ll have something of you when I'm in there. 

MIKE: You don't think that'll… make things worse? Him seeing you wearing a necklace?

WILL: I'll wear it under my shirt, against my skin. (Gazing lovingly at Mike, he crosses his arms over his chest like a hug.) Beside my heart, where he can't see. 

(Overcome with affection, Mike gently presses his lips into Will's, wondering how it's possible to love someone this much. Wondering how his heart can hold it all.)

[blingyu]

Why I think Byler HAS to be engame

Homophobes stay out, toxic Milevens stay out. This is discussing the Byler ship and why I personally believe it has to be canon. In fact, I think if it isn’t canon it would do a disservice to the show and all that it has built up. 

Im fairly confident we are getting Byler endgame (the 1% is just personal self doubt). For a LONG time I didn’t think about the Byler ship, because I had been through so many queerbaiting ships that go no where in the past. In Stranger Things 3 I definitely got the vibes that Will liked Mike, but I truly thought it’d just be unspoken. After Volume 2 of ST 4, it can’t be unspoke. We as the audience know the truth: Will Byers is in love with Mike Wheeler.

For the longest time I also said that I didn’t care who ended up being canon (Byler vs Mileven) I just cared if it had good writing. I am now of the belief that you cannot have Mileven endgame and it be good writing. This is for a few reasons. 

The Painting (Van) Scene: Will gives Mike his painting. The painting that was supposedly for a girl. Mike immediately smiles at this gift but looks conflicted when Will said it was commissioned by Jane. Will also lied about everything El felt towards Mike, because it was Will who felt these things. Will loves Mike the way Mike wants to be loved. Mike doesn’t love El the way she wants him to love her. El deserves someone who can love her for who she is, not what she does (her powers)

Mike’s Monologue: The consequence of the van scene is the monologue. Mike practically takes those words Will used and gives his own version of the speech. However, he needs Will’s reassurance the whole time. Mike should be able to say I love you to El, without needing someone guiding him. I honestly don’t think that he would’ve ever said I love you if Will wasn’t there basically helping him say it. Also the whole love at first sight thing is bs, in S1 it’s obvious that Mike wasn’t in love with El. He was caring for her, and helping her hide from the bad men. In return, she was helping them find Will. Now whether or not Mike did develop a crush is different, but the fact remains that it wasn’t at first sight. It begs the question of just how much did he lie in this monologue?

The painting plot and Will’s love for Mike is definitely not over: Will lied about the painting. At the end of S4, Mike and El aren’t talking much. I imagine that this could be confusing to Mike, who told El he loved her like she wanted, and Will told Mike she needed him. I definitely think the painting will come up in discussion between Mileven. Mike won’t be happy finding out Will lied, and I think this is going to be a form of conflict between Byler. The only resolution I can see is Will confessing that it was his feelings. It was him who needed Mike. So- we’ve established two things: 1) Mike and El are not in the best place, they might even break up, and 2) Will needs to confess about what happened in the van scene. I think the only satisfying conclusion for these plotlines is Mileven breaking up and Mike realizing he likes Will. Argue with a wall.

Will’s ending being about romantic love and Eleven’s being familial love: I think that this would be the most satisfying conclusion. Eleven and Will are siblings now, but they grew up very different. Will is gay, so he probably thinks that he doesn’t deserve romantic love, he thinks he doesn’t have a chance (remember in season 3, with his mother? “I’m not gonna fall in love”). Will has so much platonic love in his life, as does Eleven. Will hasn’t experienced romance. As a queer person myself, I’m rooting for him, and I root for him to fall in love with his childhood best friend. crazy together. Eleven, on the other hand, needs a strong family. The Byers and Hopper is that for her, but in S5 they’ll finally be all together, and be the family that they’re meant to be. Together as one unit. She didn’t have the best examples of familial love in the lab. She didn’t have platonic or romantic love either, but meeting the party and Mike gave her that. However, as stated earlier, Mike and her are at the end of their ropes. There’s only so much love you have before you have to call it quits. I think with the “From, El” letter that was her being done with Mike. I can’t blame her. This boy does not cherish her like she deserves to be. If you are a fan of El, you have to know she can do much better than whatever this relationship with Mike is. Once you give your all and don’t receive that energy back, you feel the need to move on. I mean, she saved all of Mike’s letters and we see Mike on screen crumple up 2 and throw away one of them. This is a textbook example of not putting in the same effort. 

So yeah, I don’t know how to end this besides saying Byler endgame is the only possibility in my mind now. I don’t see how Mileven could be endgame, and if they were planning on that, they really wrote themselves into a bad spot. I definitely could’ve articulated this better, and there’s probably TONS of things I’m forgetting, but from a story standpoint Will x Mike is the only thing that makes sense going forward.

[howtobecomeadragon]

Tbh I think the show won't spend much time showing Byler's romance, it will most likely be similar to Nancy and Jonathan's 'romance' in S2, where Nancy realized she liked Jonathan and they got together. I think they'll give the same situation to Mike's character where after the break up he'll realize that he likes Will and that he and El were not meant to last 🤷‍♀️. I doubt it's gonna take a huge screen time, and tbh I think Will's plot will be tied more to the supernatural stuff so Byler would be more in the background and would not be a priority.

All they really need to do is to show Mike's confusion more and his realizing his feelings for Will like the way Nancy realized her feelings toward Jonathan in my opinion. I also think it's most likely to happen in ep7 or even in the last ep like the other couples.

hello hello anon! thanks for sharing your thoughts!!

I don't agree with you, though, for a few reasons.

byler will be a huge plot twist for most of the audience. by the end of s1, most people knew that Nancy liked Jonathan and that they were probably going to end up together, so getting the storyline and the audience to that point for jancy in s2 wasn't very hard. the same is not true for Mike and Will. there will need to be a lot of fleshing out about Mike's thoughts and feelings and exploring how he came to like Will after what we've seen in s1-s4.

which of course leads to needing an exploration of Mike's self denial of his sexuality, his internalized homophobia, etc. and making sure the (mostly straight) general audience can understand and empathize and ROOT for byler. which IS going to be harder than getting the audience to root for handsome, sweet Joanthan. that is much more nuanced and will take longer to explain than just the fact that Nancy waited around for Jonathan to make a move and just moved on when he didn't. it takes more nuance, more skill, and more time. this is also in contrast bc we just needed to go back 1 season to explain and understand Nancy's thought process for being with Steve in s1 and going to Jonathan in s2. byler will require showing us enough evidence for Mike's feelings for Will that the audience cannot just day "yeah but he was with El for FOUR seasons." they need to show strong enough evidence to withstand four seasons of Mike's relationship with El.

additionally, there will be exploration of El's feelings on the matter, and making sure that El ends up in a happy place (much more so than needed to happen for Steve in s2, with several more seasons for him to come to terms with Nancy not loving him). that will also require an exploration of Mike explaining how he feels or El finding out how he feels, how El feels, and likely a discussion about how homophobia affected Mike and why it led him to act throughout the seasons so that she can get some closure and understanding.

now I'm not saying that the byler storyline is going to take up a huge portion of s5, but I think it deserves and necessitates a more in depth exploration (than s2 jancy or s2 lumax for example) for the storyline to be satisfying for the general audience. the duffers aren't going to half ass a gay romantic plot twist between the main characters and risk a ton of the audience just calling bullshit on the whole thing and not going back to rewatch. the fun and payoff of the plot twist is the rewatchability, and the duffers will want to fully flesh out everything going on in Mike's head throughout the seasons to make the ga want to go back and pick up on the clues like bylers have been doing since s4 and earlier.

those are my thoughts and thank you for sharing yours!!

[emblazons]

I always thought it was weird that the thing Melvins defaulted to when they saw July criticism of Mike is "you're just mad your ship didn't happen" or "So Byler not being canon makes Mike a bad character? Stay mad." Because there's a large middle ground in between "Byler canon in vol 2" and "Mike ignoring Will crying in the van and saying his life started that day they met El in the woods."

If they weren't intending for Byler S5 endgame (which we know now that they are) then there is so much they could have done that didn't fit into one of those two extremes and still was written well, and so seeing all the (at the time) valid criticism be dismissed as just bitter shippers being bitter never sat right with me.

(I’m assuming this is in regard to the answered asked I linked in a couple of posts before this, so forgive me if I’m mistaken lol. That’s what I had in mind answering this).

Honestly? When I first walked into this fandom I didn’t even realize the things you listed were mlvn “talking points” until I saw them repeatedly in comments from vitriolic antis obsessed with ‘defending’ their ship / tearing down byler 😭 the first time I saw someone try to use me being critical of the writing to say that somehow meant mlvn endgame I laughed aloud, because the fact is (dare I admit this lmao) I was sold on those two breaking up more clearly after vol ii than I was Byler happening in S5 ☠️

That said—it is curious even now that people think engaging critically / having (at least somewhat objective) criticism for your media somehow means you don’t like what you’re criticizing, considering that (at least for me) it was the total opposite. It was my love for ST that made me invested enough to dig into why what happened in vol ii with WillElMike went down in the first place—and I’ve always been a firm believer in the “the most respectful thing you can do when engaging with an artist is to take their work seriously,” which was the respect I showed The Duffers by making an attempt to make sense of the “mess” they presented in Vol II.

To this day I think there might have been a few ways to make clearer their intent without giving the entire plot away—and I think The Duffers realize it too, considering they’ve admitted to hearing feedback from S4 and clarifying / reworking some things in S5 (if someone had that I’d love a link. I’m like 80% sure it was something for TUDUM) even though they do play stuff close to the chest. It’s not bad to admit a few things could have been clearer/tighter or even that it’s probably not great that it took most of even their most dedicated fans several months of reframing to make sense of their work, but I digress—the duffers aren’t perfect, even though they’ve written a great story + have a clear setup moving them into season 5. And that’s okay!

I’m more than willing to give them the benefit of the doubt now that I know what their intentions were—which is why I always tell people to listen to the creators more than the actors when it comes to understanding wtf is going on. When you listen to how they write / what they think about what’s going on, it becomes a lot clearer 1) where their interests lie and 2) what they are trying to get across in both the action and the subtext—which is how most bylers got to the sentiments we have now.

Thanks for the ask!

[bookinit02]

HI ME AGAIN . Glad you appreciate the asks because here's another. I just finished the posted script, and I'll be moving on to the fic soon! There were SO MANY THINGS I loved outside of just the Byler (which I will no doubt scream about via Ao3 once I get to the fic version of those moments), and I started to write them down but only once I got to episode five, so unfortunately I forgot most of them. However here's a few anyway:

All the scenes with El, Lucas, and Max were SO SWEET. Them working together to save and hide her, them talking about love, just—ALL OF. I love that trio in general and the focus on them in the script is great ❤️

Argyle and Will's talk was so sweet :( I especially love the added dimension you gave Argyle in that scene, outside of just "comic relief stoner dude" (and the plants!!! he named the plants after all his friends!!! so SWEET)

That cut from Jonathan incredulously asking Nancy "What? You and Steve just spend all your time—" to Dustin yelling "Fuck!" in frustration was HILARIOUS and I can ABSOLUTELY picture that happening on TV

Robin and Vickie!!! Yes!!! The lesbians are winning!!!!! I almost wish Vickie HAD stayed to see who it was/Steve had just come out before she left bc them meeting would have been... both sweet and hilarious.

Okay I was going to wait to freak out about the Byler-specific stuff because it'll be the main focus of the fic but like. I can't bro. Mike not even HESITATING to jump in after Will? The relief of them finally revealing their secrets and comforting each other (and then the frustration of Mike telling Will his Vecna-vision of Will's corpse is "nothing" IMMEDIATELY AFTER THAT CONVO like I get the reasoning but CHRIST dude)? Mike just casually revealing he self-sacrificially jumped into the quarry once before and proceeding to not elaborate AT ALL? And the LETTERS oh my god. When/if ever those get revealed to Will I am going to LOSE IT.

Whoops this got long again - last point. Overall I just... absolutely love this script? All the dialogue and the actions feels so in-character, like I can actually envision it all being said in the show—ESPECIALLY Erica's lines, you have her little middle school snark down PAT.

Okay I am done screaming . For now. Much love ❤️

hi!! sorry it’s taken me so long to answer this, it took me a while to get back in the comment-answering mood😭💗

i’m glad you’re enjoying the elumax plot! they’re very very special to me and i enjoy writing them very much :)

argyle!! i personally love scenes where the “comic relief” character is given unexpected depth, so i was really excited to explore that with him. that moment specifically was inspired by a really great s5 fic (can’t remember the name right now, unfortunately—if anyone knows, please feel free to leave it in the comments!) where argyle brings pizza rolls to the hospital for max and lucas. it was such a sweet moment in that fic, and i really admire how the author treated his character. i wanted to emulate that, at least a little bit!

you are the ONLY PERSON that commented on that moment, thank you so much😭😭😭💗 i was proud of it. feels very much like something the show would do (if they were allowed to say fuck more often!)

ROVICKIEEE💗💗💗 dw she will definitely meet steve eventually!

glad you liked all the byler :) it’s been a couple fics in the making!

thank you so much for the comment, i get really really excited when people comment on my scripts🥹🫶🏻 and yes, erica!! love her to bits :)

[onstoryladders]

so thought about getting into byler or rather stranger things latley but i remember your post about byler having strong gramblack vibes and i am still haunted by the disaster that was gramblack (my beloved). and honestly i dont know if i could turn off the shipping goggles when i know they are shipped by others when i start the show. so from a scale of like toddblack to gramblack what kinda mess is byler?

Oh, this is a nice one. I don't know how but anons on this blog ALWAYS manage to read my mind and ask exactly what I want to be asked 😂 I've wanted to talk about Byler and Gramblack for eons, you have no idea gdubdgsy so here we go!

Alright, I'm gonna preface this by saying that Gramblack is truly the ONLY thing in my past experiences that still manages to give me some doubts about Byler. If it wasn't for that, then I wouldn't have anything to fear, because every single detail in Stranger Things points to Byler, and even though many people joke about Byler ending up like Johnlock or Klance or whatever other Ship That Never Was™, those have absolutely nothing in common with Will and Mike, starting with the fact that Byler is already half canon, since Will is canonically in love with Mike.

Gramblack was just-- terrible writing, but it was also malicious (because the writers wanted to skew our perception of Gram and Black's relationship so they could “surprise” us with that shitty twist) and concerned characters that weren't as important to the story as the main ones (I don't care what anyone says, the writers cared about SeanWhite the most lol which is such a shame because between the three pairings they were the least interesting to me, but I digress).

In Byler's case, we have an established love triangle between three characters that are very central to the narrative. The Duffers said Will is gonna have an important role in season 5, and we're gonna see the resolution of his coming of age arc – which is not just about him being gay in general, but also about his feelings for Mike.

Now, I can't see the future, so I don't know what will happen in season 5. Maybe the Duffers will catch a bad case of Selective Bad Writing™ and start fucking up the Byler storyline out of nowhere, what do I know. What I do know is that everything points to Byler endgame, and many arcs and characters are gonna suffer if they decide to take a step back from a path that THEY chose – because there was absolutely no need to show how IN LOVE Will is with Mike if that storyline has to end up in rejection.

And since the other couples in the show are well written, I don't see why the writers should suddenly decide to make Mileven endgame when... well, I mean, there must be a reason if no one can stand them, even in the GA 🙄

What I'm trying to say is that what makes Byler similar to Gramblack is that both pairings are what the story NEEDS in order to work. In both cases, if you mess up the couple, you mess up everything else too, because the relationship is so strongly intertwined with the narrative that it's a crime not to see that.

In Gramblack's case, that's what happened, but as I said: it was malicious, and all the hints about Gram being in love with Black were put there for a reason. We weren't imagining things. We weren't delusional. The Not Me writers consciously decided to EXPLOIT our expectations to gain an emotional reaction from a twist that didn't work.

I don't think the Stranger Things writers are gonna do the same thing. The backlash would be a nightmare, and they seem to care about their characters enough not to fuck up on purpose.

Why build up a romantic connection for four season and make it end up in rejection? If Will was a girl or El was a boy we wouldn't be here rn 😭

[clarkegriffins]

Sort of random rambling nonsense but you’re the person with the closest opinions to my own I think (you even have a Clarke url and she’s still my favorite ever!) so apologies if it comes off bitter and unhinged BUT. I love byler, prefer it even, as a ship because I love Will and the childhood best friends trope sucks me in every time, but the fandom is literally insane and I can’t stand it. I think it’s because I’m in my 20s and a lot of them are teens but some of the behavior is just inexcusable honestly? “El has to be independent” horrible takes everywhere, Mike HAS to be gay (which is just biphobia most of the time), Will will NEVER be happy unless he’s with Mike and never moves on, Mike only liked El because she had no hair and looked like a boy at first, etc. Don’t even get me started on the “proofs” that get so unhinged that I genuinely wonder if some of them are ok—today I saw one comparing a shot from the Suzie scenes to the last supper painting???? And even though I am neutral on mileven it’s clear that’s what they’re going with so all of this absolute byler endgame certainty everywhere also baffles me. The thing is, I find the ship adorable still, but I really wish the stans could get a collective reality check because they’re embarrassing and obnoxious and sometimes. I wonder how they could’ve watched vol2 and not realized they’re telling the unrequited love angle in canon and can just make transformative content to alleviate that in fanon. /end vent

OH ANON I LOVED THIS ASK SO MUCH, thank u for sharing how you’re feeling and i can just say: SAME, FUCKING SAME. first i’m gonna say something if u know me/my account, u should know that i was (i think i still am, i’m just on....hiatus) a hardcore byler shipper since 2016/season 1, when this ship used to be a crackship and a joke for many people, it was TOUGH back then, i’ve been loving them for years, bc just like u said: childhood friends to lovers is amazing, it’s one of my favorite tropes ever, i have many other ships like this... and just like u said i also love will, i LOVE will, with all my heart (i’m a willelsteve stan since 2016), and now about the fandom i’ll say, it was understandable having hope before vol 2, the whole mike not saying i love you to el was a bit weird to me and to the rest of the fandom, my account before and after vol 2 is two different accounts lmao, before vol 2 i was being hopeful, i made some gifsets with theories and all, i thought that the only way the story would make sense was if byler happened/mileven break up, but after vol 2 something changed, it was like if something finally clicked you know? every missing part, every doubt, every confusion i had disappeared and things became cristal clear to me, and i sit and thought about everything that happened in season 4 and the past seasons and i finally took my byler shipper glasses off and i saw how naive i was being, also a little dumb lmao, u don’t need to be smart af or understand everything about media to know that the direction byler is going is the unrequited one, byler actually never stood a chance, mike and will’s relationship was important to will for him to find out he is gay, it’s actually a little cliche i know but it makes sense, if it wasn’t mike it would have been lucas, or dustin, but since mike is will’s best friend it was him, and it makes sense will would fall in love with the first person to show him kindness and was friendly, we all know how caring mike can be with him, so it makes sense, i can talk about myself like i find out i was bisexual bc i fell in love with my best friend, and spoiler alert we didn’t work, but i will always be grateful for her because i was able to find out who i am (insert the i know what u are meme here lmao), which i think is the same for will, this is the story the duffers are telling, this is part of will’s storyline.... now let’s go to some topics:

the “el has to be independent” take: BULLSHIT, i think if u have been watching the show u should know that el, just like joyce and nancy are independent af, el was away from mike in s2 and she had adventures by HERSELF to find out who she is, to find out about her powers, her mom, etc....in season 3 she also had adventures by herself and max, and in season 4 we saw her again going back to the lab by herself to figure stuff out and get her powers back.......so as we can see, ELEVEN IS INDEPENDENT, but at the end of the day she always comes back to mike bc she’s IN LOVE with him and people need to accept that, it doesn’t make her weak or not independent, it’s part of who she is, she’s in love, female characters can be in love and independent, they don’t have to pick one, they can have BOTH. PERIOD.

the “mike has to be gay” ............sigh.......... tbh anon i’m tired of talking about this, i’ve already talked about how the byler fandom can be biphobic af sometimes which is one of the reasons why i’m.....distant from them now, so i’m not gonna speak about this again, just know that if u don’t think that mike ever had any romantic feelings for el ur literally embarrassing urself, he’s not confused or anything, mike was created in love with el.... let’s talk about mike btw, remember how i said that after vol 2 something clicked? so mike is part of this, mike has SO MUCH overlooked trauma and people don't even realize it, el’s “death” is season 1 marked him for good, and everything we are watching  now is the result of this trauma, season 2 is not the “best mike season” like people say, mike was depressed, going through pstd, he literally says to will that he thought he was going crazy, and after all that sadness he finds out el is alive again and WOW, it was like he finally could breath again, we can see in his eyes, the longing, the sadness, the relief..... and just like that he had to let her go again so she could save the world ONCE AGAIN, and he was so scared, he was crying and he made her promise to him that she would be back..... and then we have season 3, el can’t leave her house bc you know my baby girl is wanted in 65656564 countries lmao so #GIRLBOSS of her if u ask me, so mike has to go to her house to spend time with her since she cant leave her house that much or go to public places, and that makes him be distant from his friends for a little bit but can we blame him? like i know that he could manage his time better but lets not forget that hes also a kid KDJGSNJDKGNKJGNSG like he was what? 13? in season 3? do u really expect a 13 year old to know EVERYTHING? but people say “lucas can do that with max just fine” first max it’s not el, like i said el is wanted in 545645645 countries, it’s easy to manage ur time with ur friends/girlfriend when ur girlfriend can hang out with u all the time, like lucas can take max to watch movies, mike can’t, anyways you know what i mean, this is getting too long so i will link u to these posts where i talked about mike and mileven and how i think his storyline makes sense in s4 here and here, the show have been telling us about mike’s insecurity and fear about losing el for seasons now, but we weren’t paying attention....

and finally the “Will will NEVER be happy unless he’s with Mike and never moves on” BIG SIGH, i said it once and i’ll say it again: DON’T REDUCE WILL DOWN TO HIS FEELINGS FOR MIKE, JUST DON’T, it’s part of him? YES, but it’s not everything about him as a character, the whole “Will will only be happy if he’s with mike” is such bullshit bc idk if u noticed but will already lived without mike, bc he never had mike to begin with, you can't lose something you never had, if we could take away the trauma from the upside down off him we could see that will can be happy just by being next to his friends, to his family, tbh i feel like will’s storyline is about growing up, being able to love and accept himself and understand that he’s loved, he’s not a mistake or a freak, that’s will’s character, and i hope more than anything that my baby boy can learn how to love himself and finally be free, el kind of had the same stuff in season 4 too, when she finally stand up to her abuser and said she’s not the monster, ofc it’s still a working in progress bc she blames herself for max now but is still something, and i want will to have that too.

and FINALLY the “proofs” i’ll just say: LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO i’m sorry jfkgnkdjnsdkjgndksjgndkgnskjgndkjgn i laugh so much everytime i read their theories, they are so unserious, they are queerbating themselves and they don't even realize that, they DO need a reality check asap.... but hey whatever makes them happy i just hope they're not assholes when none of this happens

ok i already talked too much, bottom line is: ship whatever u want, whatever u love, byler is such a sweet ship, they are cute af (the fandom is nasty tho), but we all know this is not the direction the show is going and as long as you know that....be free, u can ship non canon ships you know, shipping is not about canon or endgames, is about a dynamic u love no matter what. and we know that will has feelings for mike and like u said we can work with that, i know it’s sad when ur favorite pairing it’s not canon but what can i say? it happens, i have many non canon ships and i still adore them more than anything in the world.

(i'm sorry if there are any typos, i’m sleepy af)

[castlebyersafterdark]

i am seeing all sorts of things about people in shock that they are giving byler endgame away with these posts

but didnt the duffers say that they were showing their hand with season 4?? and david harbour said of s3 that if you'd been watching, you'd know that will loves mike, yet for many in s4 it was a surprise so i'm assuming bylers treated it somewhat like a spoiler too? it just doesnt seem to me that the duffers want byler to be a shock because if you've been watching the show, it's not coming out of nowhere and they've been slowly peeling it back for a while now. its the fans who seem to be setting the tone for what is and isnt a spoiler somehow, whereas it should be the writers. does that make sense? the marketing has hinted that the duffs have been writing a will-they-won't-they love triangle, but at the same time, this isnt a teen drama that flip flops back and forth. everyone knew jopper were going to get together at some point because the writing and directing and acting told us so (much less visibly than byler might i add). i dont think byler is a spoiler so much, it's just something theyre slowly working towards. its only mlvns and antis that make bylers doubt and wonder if it's actually this big surprise, when, to me, it's just another aspect of what theyre writing and revealing.

its a strange one. i truly wonder what the writers think of how messy the fandom gets, and whether they ever doubt their writing skills because of how misguided some viewers seem to be about what's actually happening in the show. or do you think this is common for almost all big media? i've never been a fan of anything where some people are so blinded to what's actually going on before.

Yeah, I mean, Byler isn't together yet so it's not like hinting at the existence of the possibility is technically a spoiler, but in canon as of the ending of season 4, Mike and El are still together that we know of, so we are still very much in triangle territory. Byler hasn't happened on screen yet. I think it's no secret it's heading there, like you said, they've played their hand. Analytical people who like to predict the show and the plot can and have conjectured where the relationships are heading, but maybe not the casual watcher. So for the casual watcher, they wouldn't want to give away all the secrets and plot points. But those who know... well, we just know.

I honestly don't think the writers and creators pay as much attention to the fandom as some may think. It's too possible as an influence, too easy to be a distraction. I think the Duffers themselves have said they don't pay attention to social media so I'd honestly say they're unbothered.

[bluebear-d]

Five act structure: reason to hope

I don't usually make posts on Tumblr, but i think after st4 maybe i should.

I agree with a lot of criticism for s4 and share everyone's pain. Hope all of you are well or at least getting there.

But here's something I've been thinking, so read on if you want to get another perspective or a little bit of hope in the magic of storytelling.

If the Duffers knew for awhile that they would have 5 seasons, they might have planned s4-5 together, a two-parter of sorts. So the reason s4 feels incomplete is because it is! And the reason it doesn't offer all the things the marketing implied is because those were meant for s5.

I think the Duffers are playing the long game using the 5 act structure. You can read about it on the internet, for example here is a good general article which i'm gonna quote a little.

I want to talk specifically about the final suspense, which is an important narrative tool occurring in act 4.

In 5 act structure, the forth act is where everything that can go wrong, does. It's the darkest before the dawn part, the part where we, along with the characters, lose all hope for things to end well.

It's like Sam's speech in The two towers: "how could the end be happy. How could the world go back to the way it was when so much bad happened. But in the end, it’s only a passing thing, this shadow. Even darkness must pass. A new day will come. And when the sun shines it will shine out the clearer."

I think there's reason to assume this is the structure the Duffers are planning.

First of all, the show is 5 seasons long. What better way to structure it than with five acts?

Secondly, other seasons seem to fall neatly into this structure.

For example, s3:

If we go by this structure and try to imagine what s5 might look like, it also fits perfectly:

Sound familiar? After the brutal and incomplete s4?

So if we assume Stranger Things is supposed to have this structure (which i think is reasonable and highly probable), then s4 is exactly the season where everything is so wrong it seems to never be right again.

But a new dawn is just around the corner.

A new hope if you will.

So take heart.

p.s. I know we've waited three years for this and didn't get much of anything resolved. I know we're all having trust issues right now irt the Duffers' plan and writing, but i'm willing to give them the benefit of the doubt. We've loved this show for so long, it gave us a lot, we put so much passion, effort, skill and love into it that i think it's not entirely fair to anyone to just abandon all hope and judge an unfinished show.

We're all hurt and frustrated right now, and afraid to be hurt again in two years. But hope is hardly a bad thing. Remember: the story is not over yet, and some wonderful storytelling just might be still happening.

p.p.s. With byler and Robin x Vicky and Will's potential coming out it's also possible that it's just not allowed to make any of that explicit until well into s5. It can be part of the deal with netflix or something, for fear that anything more than "up to interpretation" will cost the platform a chunk of its viewership.

It's a sad possiblity to consider, but I'm speaking from experiences with other shows and fandoms.

Just as an example: the creators of Steven Universe faught tooth and nail for a lesbian wedding and a kiss on screen, WON THIS, but immediately got cancelled and faught some more for additional several episodes to conclude the series.

Obviously, they aren't the same shows, I'm not saying it's the same situation.

But stuff like this still happens, unfortunately.

[deanismysavior]

Ik everyone talks about this in different fonts, but your ask about mike and nancy and how he feels comfortable opening up to will really struck me because wow, broski literally NEVER opens up to his girlfriend. Like we knew this already, but it really does go beyond him not having dramatic heart to hearts with El on top of vans. He really doesn’t talk to El about ANYTHING other than things related to the fight against the UD. And I think that directly connects to him putting her on a pedestal. Beyond his sexuality, beyond the debate of whether he loves will or el, why are my chemical romances completely chill with a bf/gf who don’t open up about anything. That should concern them, but it never does . Like literally, when you contrast with Lumax, who are vulnerable with each other ATT, it’s startling. How do melvin shippers not see that? Because that goes beyond the Byler debate into the core emptiness of their relationship which is a fact.

Yeah, let's talk about Mike and El for a second, because I think there's more to unpack here.

We really see so many empathy misses between the two of them, and I kind of think a lot more of those in later seasons come/start from El shutting down Mike's feelings than the other way around. I mean, Mike sets the precedent here with blaming El a lot in season 1, and we definitely still see his issues with deflection and blame shifting, but we do see Mike TRY to understand what's going on with El, and I'm not so sure we see El doing the same for Mike, though to give El the benefit of the doubt here, I also don't think it's ever been demonstrated to her that she should be making space for Mike in this way.

Let's take a look:

First we have this scene here where Mike is trying to relate to El and show her around. He's excitedly showing off all of his toys to her, and El just really could not be bothered. She gets up to scope out the rest of the room and kind of leaves Mike alone with his toys. Now obviously, this is a small thing, but I think it's an interesting way to set up their dynamic: Mike is trying to be attentive with El and make sure she's experiencing everything (making her breakfast, showing her the Lazy Boy, showing her his toy collection), and El is sort of dismissive with him. Clearly, she's also not been brought up traditionally, so I can give her a pass on these behaviors, but as for establishing a relationship between Mike and El, it's kind of already pointing toward the fact that they're not on the same page and don't really share the same interests.

We see basically the same thing happen here in the s3 opening makeout scene where Mike breaks their kiss to rock out to Never Surrender and El covers Mike's mouth and tells him to stop singing. He says, "What, you don't like it?" And it's played off as this kind of comedic moment, but we get the sense here again that El kind of stifles a bit of Mike's goofiness and playfulness, so much of what makes him him, to just go back to making out. It doesn't read to me here like she's all that interested in spending QUALITY time with Mike, she's moreso interested in engaging in teenage behavior with him, gossiping and making out.

But let's take a step back for a second and look at their initial kiss scene here because I think this also highlights how much they are not on the same page at any point in their relationship. In this first scene we get between them that really establishes them as a romantic relationship, Mike is telling El that she can come live with him and his family, that his parents will be like her parents, and his sister will be like her sister, and El asks if that means that Mike will be like her brother, and he says, No, that's different. Here, Mike is being pushed into creating this romantic bond between he and El because Lucas and Dustin frame his attentiveness to her in this way, and likewise, El is pushed into framing this as a romantic bond and not a familial bond by Mike. While Mike is confusing platonic feelings for romantic feelings, El is confusing familial feelings for romantic feelings.

And we see this displayed so apparently in El's entire arc during season 2. She leaves Hawkins to try to establish for herself what her relation to the world is, and she goes out in search of family, first to her Mom, and then to Kali, her sister. Both her aunt and Kali offer her places to stay and offer her a place in their family, but El returns to Hawkins, and says she's going "Home" because that's where her family is, not just Hopper, but Mike and the rest of the party too. El views these relationships as being like family and like home to her.

And this sets up so well why Mike and El's relationship in season 3 feels so off to the both of them. They believe that their bond has to be romantic because of how much expectation and waiting was built between them, but we again see them not being on the same page.

Now we already talked about the beginning makeout, so I won't go over that again, but I do want to key into a few of the points in their dynamic. While we've talked about how El and Will are constantly confused and interchanged in the story with Mike, Mike and Hopper are consistently also confused and interchanged in the story for El. Mike kind of plays, in a weird way, a 3rd father figure role to El in places.

Now we know that Hopper has always been overprotective of El and has firm rules set in place for her, but we also see this behavior show up with Mike in season 3. He's concerned about having lost El, and he kind of steps in by trying to have control over how she uses her powers. He thinks the others are trying to exploit her, so while his intentions are well-meaning here, El doesn't need this kind of overprotection from Mike because she already has it from Hopper, and her whole arc in season 3 is about her discovering herself outside of being defined by her relationships with others.

So when we get to season 4, and we see that Mike has created more distance in their relationship while El is sort of clinging onto it and fully investing into Mike, I think similarly to how Mike threw himself into El in s3 after being afraid he lost her in s2, El does the same thing with Mike because she thinks she lost Hopper, and so Mike becomes really her main support system. While of course she loves the Byers and Will, Jonathan, and Joyce step in to become family for her, they are not as familiar to her as Mike is, and Mike is the only person besides Hopper who has really been there for El since the beginning. She leans so heavily onto Mike and displaces a lot of her insecurities about losing her powers, losing her home, and losing her Dad into Mike's inability to say "I love you" because what El really wants and needs in season 4 is a sense of stability that she doesn't have.

So when Mike finally tries to address the problem after he finds out El has been lying to him and that she's been being bullied, he's trying to understand why she hasn't been talking to him, and instead of really talking through it, they both put the blame back on each other. El blames Mike for viewing her as a monster and for not saying I love you, and Mike deflects by saying "you know how I feel about you," making the insecurity her problem instead of something that they work through together as a couple. El can't understand why Mike can't tell her he loves her, but Mike also can't understand why El needs so badly to hear it. And so the only reassurances he gives her are about her powers because that's all she's really defined herself by for so long. He views El's hyperindependence and her need to do everything on her own as a strength in her and not as the result of insecurity and instability that it is.

El and Mike care about each other a lot, but they don't relate to one another. They don't understand one another, and they're constantly never on the same page about their relationship or what one needs from the other. That's what makes it so clear that the monologue didn't solve anything. Because neither one of them was actually hearing the other throughout the entirety of their relationship.

[demadogs]

New Finn interview basically says that Mike and El are back together after all their "finding themselves" work... I think he just didn't want to spoil it in the other interviews and that's why he was staying vague, I'm scared right now...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rwgvWs-EY1k if you want to see it

i said i wasnt gonna answer anymore doubting byler asks that just say why they dont think itll happen but i’ll answer this one. finn was asked how the distance between mike and el affect their relationship and this was his answer:

“i think it actually… its good i think it allows them to kinda have space away from each other and focus on their own kinda things and lives and what they do best at and what they love about themselves and i think its a really nice thing for them to like come back together and have that kinda relationship”

i honestly think what he meant by “come back together” was just the lack of physical distance between them once theyre reunited and the word “relationship” could just be him referring to their dynamic together. pretty much everything else he said makes so much sense for the context to be mike figuring out his sexuality when shes away.

also you guys have to keep in mind that m*leven is the biggest ship in this show and both finn and millie cannot avoid being asked about it so theyre gonna answer as best they can without giving anything away. people shouldnt rely on or read into answers with specific language that could be interpreted differently bc they are intended to be very vague.

[hawkinsschoolcounselor]

Have you seen the interview? What are your thoughts? Oh and don't you think it's suspicious that hey keep stressing the thing with Will being the third wheel? I think it is.

Ok, I had a whole big post going that was intended to address each Ask I was individually getting, but Tumblr flaked out and I lost it. I had also unfortunately already deleted several of the Asks.

I will do my best to address them all in this post.

Yes, I have seen the interview. Believe me, nothing in this fandom happens without someone sending it to me. It was not a great time for me to see it. I had another rough day at work. I mean, not only was it rough, but this happened:

Sigh. Yeah. And I didn't have an El there to help me.

As a result, I waited until I got home so I could stress eat and pour myself a drink.

I do think it's odd that Will's status as a third wheel is continually stressed. At this point, I'm seeing this as an official part of the marketing. We've seen it in, what, three or four separate interviews in the past couple of weeks? A bit sus, as the kids would say.

I'm not thrilled that the leaks are true. It's not just that the leaks go against what I thought would happen. I also really just don't like how easy it was for this information to get out. I know a lot more about what's going to happen than I was supposed to. I can only imagine they bothered showing this scene in this interview because the internet was already aware of it.

I'm not too bothered by the fact that Mike is apparently ignoring Will. I expected things to get worse before they got better. I just didn't expect them to get this much worse. Season 3 Mike could be considered an accident on his part. He wasn't trying to neglect Will, but he was just so focused on El that he did. This time around, it looks like he's intentionally ignoring Will.

While that is some pretty classic overcompensating behavior for a closeted gay kid, it's still painful. Above all else, Will is supposed to be Mike's best friend. Indeed, the best thing he's ever done. He may be rationalizing that it's for the best, but the amount of pain it's going to cause Will...ugh. We don't yet know if the writers are even going to acknowledge Will's birthday, but that's another thing to keep in mind. Will has no doubt been excited for Mike to come visit, and he's going to be gutted by this, especially if it's on his birthday.

None of this "kills Byler" or anything of the sort, though. That's probably the biggest thing to keep in mind. It would have been foolish to think Mike would just be lovey dovey with Will without some sort of buildup. I, personally, was expecting just a lot of awkwardness, not this, but I'm not surprised beyond that.

There are some things I will be watching for in regards to this:

We see something happen in Hawkins before Mike leaves that has an impact on him. I can only guess what, but just something that shows that Mike is shaken a bit.

Will doesn't just sit there and take it.

Jonathan has a "man to man" with Mike after coming close to beating the hell out of the kid.

They resolve this before the end of the season. Either they kill any chances of Byler, or they make it happen now. I'm over this tired trope of dragging gay reveals out until the end. Mike and Will would already have to hide their feelings in-universe. Fuck having to also hide their feelings from the audience.

Mike comes clean about his feelings to both El and Will.

I'll just also point out that it is very risky for the Duffers to paint Mike like a douche yet again. The more he acts like this, the harder it will be for fans to eventually forgive him. We need to be able to see why he's doing this. Whether it's through normal flashbacks or cutaways or something more Stranger Things-y like a Vecna trance or El memory visit, I don't know, but it has to happen. We need to see what's going on in Mike's head. Failure to do this is what would result in fans claiming it came out of nowhere when Mike finally admits his feelings.

TL;DR: Mike is exhibiting classic overcompensation while also avoiding the source of his anxiety. This is closeted gay teen behavior to the extreme.

Buckle up, friends. This is going to be a bumpy ride, but it's still going in the direction we thought it was.

[beepboop358]

Helloo, i'm probably just repeating what everyone else is saying but i need to get my thoughts out 😅

On the one hand, the only thing giving me a little bit of hope at this point is the framing of all the couples at the end. On the other hand, i didn't see a single real (as in obvious) hint of mike reciprocating, did you?

But okay, plot-wise, how could they move from mlvn to byler after such a big love confession? I know we can say it was weird or forced or just copy-pasted from what will said earlier, but i'm sure most casual viewers loved it and found it super romantic.

Unless they open s5 with a honest conversation between mlvn that ends in a breakup, i just don't see that relationship ending at all, and even if that happened i doubt there would be a way to develop byler in a satisfying way.

Alternatively the most i could imagine is mlvn break up whenever in s5 and then at the very end we have byler touching hands during an emotional conversation or sharing a long look and a smile.

What do you think?

Hey!

The framing at the end gives me hope too, but then I think about if they’re just oblivious to the implications that shot has or if its intentional queerbating.

I think if they’re going to do byler in s5, the only way they can explain that love confession is that everything Mike said to El, he meant about Will. It would be the only convincing way to explain to casual viewers why it wasn’t genuine, and even then it still wont be a great way to handle that, and i’m not even sure they’ll be able to handle ANY of the relationships well anymore. So much was under developed and not given the development it needed in s4, like barely anyone had any development… It’d also be the only way i’d be okay with byler happening in s5 now, because Mike saying his life started the day he met El, which was when Will WAS MISSING is such a horrible thing to say about your best friend. It’s so cruel. And Mike only saying he loves her because she’s dying and Will encourages him to? She deserves better, and if Mike is being genuine in that speech, then Will deserves better too. And Mike deserves better than his character arc being reduced to simply a boyfriend.

I don’t know how they’ll handle things in s5 at all.I could also see them leaving the whole thing ambiguous for both ships so they never have to address anything bc they seem to like doing that - and if they did that i’d lose my fucking mind!!

I hope we get the intricate byler development and m!leven closure i thought s4 would bring, in s5. I hope if they do do byler in s5, they do it right, and fully. But i’m not confident they will anymore. I hope we get a proper coming out from Will, a love confession from Mike, and apology to Will, and explain of what Mike’s been dealing with, healthy closure for mike & el, etc, but maybe thats just wishful thinking. I don’t even know if they’d fix mike & el’s relationship if byler wasn’t canon…

Thanks for the ask! I hope you’re well! xx

[nancywheelersgirlfriend]

hey so for the fic request, i was wondering if you could do a fic about the mike will jonathan and argyle road-trip but they have to stay at a motel and byler has to share a bed (not anything yk bc they’re literally children) but through mikes pov i just wanna see him have a gay panic and freak out and get his inner thoughts

this is my first byler fic!! more of a short character study than anything. i hope this is what you were looking for!!! :)

gentle on my mind (1,392 words)

“We can only afford one room.”

Mike didn’t realize he was supposed to react with anything but mild annoyance before the sentence hit him square in the chest. Nearly knocked back by the emotional weight, in reality he stood and teetered to the side. The rest of the group interpreted this as his tiredness. He knew otherwise.

There was something about the implication of one room that bothered him. Two beds. Four boys. Honestly, the fact that it was getting to him was worse than the actual situation; had he never shared his bed before? Of course he had. Back when they were small enough, he and Lucas would sleep shoulder-to-shoulder on the bottom bunk of his bedroom, Dustin and Will on the top. That was how they spent summer nights. But they’d stopped doing that years ago. Mike had been sleeping alone.

Tonight, though, he wouldn’t be. Out in nowhere Nevada, shackled by clothes days-old and smelly, stood in between his best friend’s brother and said brother’s best friend, ignoring all eye contact with his best friend and trying not to wish for the world to implode. 

Instead Mike stared at the water stain on the ceiling that looked a little like a mushroom cloud. He could hear Jonathan’s low conversation with the woman at the desk only in subtle vocal tones - parents in Charlie Brown style. He knew, distantly, that this should be the least of his worries. And it was. He was trying to make it so, at least. El was somewhere lost in the desert. He hadn’t seen her in days. Sleeping arrangements shouldn’t have mattered to him.

“You alright, little dude?” Argyle asked. His voice was swimming. Mike turned away from the ceiling to glance over his shoulder, realizing he’d stayed rooted in place while his travel companions had begun heading for their motel room. 

“Uh, yeah,” Mike said intelligently. He picked up his lead-heavy feet and followed after, trailing and bumping into the columns as they walked back across the parking lot. He missed the comfort of his own bed. He missed his ability to avoid conversations he didn’t want to have. 

Sleeping in a bed with Will meant that they would have to talk. About what, exactly, Mike honestly wasn’t too sure of. The list seemed endless. He dreaded having to come up with reasons for why he had acted the way he had - all oblivious and stupid, no letters or calls or nothing. In reality he had no justification for the way he had treated Will. In his mind…

In his mind it was a different story. But a story he wasn’t willing to utter aloud, especially to the boy he’d have to survive sleeping next to. Getting killed in his sleep wasn’t on Mike’s bucket list. 

He watched Jonathan fiddle with the lock, some shitty key bent halfway down from years of misuse. Across the motel Mike suspected no-doubt shady dealings were going down; they were so isolated. Still in the back of his mind he knew the most intense and unpleasant event to happen that night would be sharing this stupid bed. 

“Right or left?” Will asked. Mike blinked back into focus to see that somehow, somewhere, he had made it through the heavy red door and was now stood at the foot of the offending bed. He looked at his best friend and back down at the mattress. 

“I don’t care,” Mike managed to choke out. He spun on his heel because just the sight of the bed was making his hands clammy. Will shuffled behind him, Jonathan and Argyle arguing by the bathroom sink. Mike moved to stand and look out the motel window. Past the opposite end of rooms, rooms potentially available to avoid sleeping in the same bed as your best friend, the desert stretched on endlessly. El could be anywhere. They were so alone out there. Mike was alone.

Except -

“Let’s go to sleep,” Will dragged out the last word childishly. Mike heard the springs of the mattress groan underneath his weight. He tore his eyes from the desert and submitted to his fate. 

Will was sprawled out on the bed, long legs kicking back and all, his hair ruffled from the day’s stress. His face was pressed into the pillow. Mike watched his mouth come slightly ajar to breathe deeper in sleep, eyes pressed shut. His eyelashes fanned out on his cheeks. He’d gotten tan in California, hadn’t he? Mike had never seen Will as anything other than on the verge of translucent. But the sun had given him colors. And freckles. Freckles that spread out across his nose, his arms. They dotted his forehead, disappearing into his bangs. It looked good. He looked good - you know. Having color. It made him healthy. Obviously he didn’t look good for any other reason.

“Mike!” Will said again. He flopped out a spaghetti limb to pat at the empty space beside him, but he didn’t open his eyes. Mike swallowed, sent up a quick prayer, and submitted to his fate.

Jonathan flicked off the last light left in between them. The room was shrouded in darkness. Only the blue light of the motel sign across the way was visible. Its neon power dripped onto the floor through the blinds, casting shadows on Will’s face. 

Mike knew he should turn over on his other side and forget the whole thing entirely. Laying on this side (his left) specifically to watch Will do whatever it was he did while he was sleeping was the stupidest idea Mike had ever had the pleasure of having. But he didn’t turn around. And neither did Will. The latter because he was halfway to REM by this point. The former for no particular reason.

Except there was a reason. He liked watching the way Will’s eyelashes fluttered everytime he took a breath. The subtle shift of his chest in a rhythm Mike appreciated paying attention to. The way the blue light of the sign lit up Will’s face in a way Mike had never seen before. Distantly Mike was reminded of the time he’d slept over at Will’s house during his period of hospitalization. How strange and affected Will had been then. He’d been at his palest. Sickly.

Now he looked healthy and good. He looked like a stranger. Maybe Mike had been the one making him sickly all along, and now that Will had moved he was thriving. He didn’t know. They hadn’t had time to talk about it. No letters or phonecalls either. Mike realized he’d committed a worse act than sharing a bed with your best friend - sharing a bed with a stranger.

God, but he didn’t want Will to be a stranger. It killed him inside to call him that. He wanted to know everything about Will inside and out. He wanted to be with Will constantly so that he wouldn’t even have to tell him - they’d sense it together, as they had when they were kids. He missed that closeness. He was desperately craving it right now, lying with a good foot of space in between himself and Will.

Slowly the realization that Mike had been avoiding for years budded at the back of his neck; like a Pompeii-level migraine. He ignored it. There were more important things to worry about. El was gone. He hadn’t called his mom in days and had no real way to.

But he wanted. Mike wanted. What he wanted he couldn’t admit. But it felt realer than anything else. 

Mike reached out and brushed apart Will’s bangs on his forehead, feather light and nearly unregistered. Will let out a little sigh but he kept his eyes closed. His hair had felt nice.

Mike was hit with a wave of wish, suddenly, to touch Will everywhere. Feel his hair by burying his hands in it. Pull him close for warmth even though Mike was burning up with a mental fever. Press all his fingers into the individual freckles to keep them there, hold them down. 

He was just tired. He was just confused. There were more important things to worry about. Mike swallowed back all protests against himself and shut his eyes. The image of Will, sleeping there with a hand tucked underneath his head, stayed.

It was the best thing he’d ever seen.