#Chocolate Diesel

[stonedcoast]

LotR Bowl, Part 1

It's not just oddly square feet that I have in common with hobbits, it's also my love of the halfling's leaf, pipeweed, hobbit leaf... or more specifically cannabis! Check this out, it's a lot of fun.

Two of my favorite people in the world and two of my wife’s favorite people in the world conveniently happen to be the same two people, and even more conveniently they happen to also be a married couple. We all attended the same college, though staggered throughout 4 different graduating classes across 5 years. Shortly after the last of us graduated, my wife (then girlfriend) and I ended up in…

[number1spongebobfan]

Paxton and Sidney Sell Chocolate

Paxton and Sidney are selling truckloads of chocolate bars.

Paxton: Remember Sidney, focus.

(Paxton says hi to Diesel 10)

Diesel 10: Yes?

Paxton: Good afternoon Diesel 10! We're selling chocolate bars.

(Sidney slides close to Diesel 10 and bulges his eye-sockets)

Diesel 10: Why is dum-dum here staring at me.

Sidney: Focusing.

Diesel 10: Back up Jack! (yanks Sidney's eyeballs with his claw)

Sidney: Deagh! . . . nice place you got here.

[noughticalcrossings]

Mama Thames

Inktober day 19. Plump

She sat enthroned on the finest of the executive armchairs. Her hair was braided and threaded with black cotton and tipped with gold, so that it stood above her brow like a crown.

[authorhjk1]

Pool Party

(Lee Ahin X Nancy Mcdonie X Male Reader)

You look one more time at the document, lying in front of you. It's Friday evening. Everyone else is going to enjoy the weekend. You sigh as you get out of your seat. Your weekend is going to be quite hectic.

"Sajangnim."

Mi-ra makes you lift your head.

"This is the report from the Diesel headquarters in Italy."

You take the thin binder out of her hand. Flipping through it, you scan the numbers.

"And here is the final draft for the Korean Air contract."

A way bigger folder this time.

"Thank you, Mi-ra."

You chuckle as you stand up.

"Now I have something to read before going to bed."

Your secretary smiles, while she bows.

"If you need any assistance over the weekend, please let me know, sir. I will gladly help."

"Thank you, but I'm sure I will manage. You are going on a trip with your boyfriend. I don't want to hold you back."

She nods, a glad smile on her face.

"Thank you, sir. I'm really excited."

"Where are you going?"

"My parent's neighbors have a big get together. We are invited."

"Ah, I see."

The two of you continue to talk as you walk towards the door.

"So, you are going back to Busan, then?"

"Yes, I am."

Mi-ra takes your jacket off the coat stand.

"I always wanted to go there, but I haven't found the time do so yet. Thank you."

She gives you your jacket, before you open the door for her.

"I'm sure our neighbors would love to invite you next year."

You laugh at her joke, before closing the door to your office behind you.

"I'm heading out for today. You can get off work now as well.

"You can always call me, sir. In case something comes up."

"Don't worry about it. I need you here next week. Fully recharged and energized. I won't call you."

Stepping through the front door, you immediately realize, what Ahin has made out of your agreement. If you only knew she meant this weekend. You groan as you hear the loud music echo through your house.

After taking your shoes and jacket off, you walk down the hallway. It seems Ahin's speaker is inside your living room. Putting your briefcase down on the kitchen counter, you see that Ahin made cookies. Probably for her guest. You don't bother asking her, putting one of them into your mouth, while taking another one. The warm cookies make the chocolate on the inside melt.

You savor the taste, walking into your living room. The sight of your dinner table almost causes you to let the second cookie fall out of your hand.

You never expected Ahin and her friend to play poker. You never expected her friend to be this sexy and alluring. And you never expected the two of them to sit at your table, barely wearing anything.

While the young brunette is still wearing denim shorts, your girlfriend is showing off her beautifully sculpted body. Since you are standing behind her, you have a good view of her naked shoulders and back. And especially her butt cheeks.

There is no way she is sitting like this without purpose. She must have known you would come home eventually. And she must have known you wouldn't be able to resist her. Her body perfectly on display in this colourful bikini.

Her hair looks somewhat like cotton candy and her nails match that colour.

Ahin's friend is wearing a blue, orange top, which is hiding her midriff. She looks just as beautiful as the woman in front of her. Her aura is model like and you realize she must be one of Ahin's ex band mates.

"Do you give up?"

Her voice is barely audible over the loud music.

You see Ahin shaking her head. It seems like none of the two noticed your appearance yet.

"Show me what you got."

Taking a step closer, you can see Ahin's friend revealing her cards. Two pairs. Your girlfriend shifts around in her chair, before revealing her own hand. She only got a pair of eights.

The brunette's evil laugh makes you chuckle as she pushes a full shot glass towards your girlfriend.

You check your watch. 7pm. Isn't that a little early?

You walk closer as Ahin tilts her head back. Only now you see the bottle of tequila standing on the table.

Standing right behind her, the brunette looks at you. It is obvious that this isn't exactly their first round and she lost a couple of times already. She gives you a slight smirk, but doesn't say anything.

Ahin groans as she puts the glass down.

You reach forward, wanting to scare her. Ahin jumps as she feels your hands on her naked shoulders.

"Yah!"

She is about to turn around, but you sneak your arms around her midriff, right beneath her chest.

"Hello, sexy."

You hear her chuckle in your ear as she slightly turns her head.

"Hi, daddy."

You knew this was coming. But you're glad the bottle of liquor isn't as empty as you thought at first. The two of them couldn't have drunk more than two or three shots each. Still, you don't know their tolerance for alcohol.

"Wanna play with us?"

Ahin kisses your cheek.

"I have a lot of work to do this weekend. I can't afford getting drunk."

She pouts at you, before struggling to get out of your hug.

"Fine. Don't play with us then."

She seems hurt as she collects all the cards from the table.

"I don't have a problem with playing. I'm just saying I can't drink."

"Or are you scared you are going to lose?"

Ahin's friend grins at you, obviously challenging you to a play.

"What am I betting? I'm not gonna drink."

You pull out the chair at the head of the table. Ahin to your left, her friend to your right.

"And no, I don't have cash on me right now."

"Why don't you bet your clothes?"

"Nancy!"

Ahin looks at the brunette and you expect her to yell at her further. Instead, she shuffles the cards.

"He is still MY boyfriend."

You see Nancy rolling her eyes.

"Come on. You told me about your agreement. He is allowed to fool around."

Watching the two of them, you wonder what Ahin told Nancy about you.

"Fine."

Your girlfriend shrugs her shoulders. First, you think that's all she has to say on the matter. But you quickly find out that Ahin has more tricks up her sleeve.

Her toes reach your leg, slowly starting to dance over your skin. Their purpose clear.

Ahin deals two cards to everyone, while her foot makes its way up your leg.

"Shouldn't we all bet the same?"

Nancy raises an eyebrow at your innocent question.

"Don't you think your girlfriend would have a small disadvantage?"

Looking at Ahin, you know the brunette is right. Except for her bikini, Ahin isn't wearing a thing.

"Do you want to keep drinking then?"

"No."

Ahin shakes her head.

"I hate the taste."

You grin, while Nancy laughs at her.

Ahin places the five cards in the middle of the table. A king of hearts, an eight of spades, a seven of spades and a queen of clubs.

The two women check their cards and so do you. A two of clubs and a three of spades. Well, that's a great start. You sigh internally, while trying to read the girl's faces. This isn't the first time you play and although there is no money on the line, you want to win. Having the chance to see both of them naked is enough motivation.

Ahin frowns, while Nancy seems to like her hand. You don't know how well they play, but you doubt they would fake their facial expressions.

"I bet a sock."

Nancy looks around the table, unable to hide her grin. Ahin is visibly mispleased. Because of her hand, or because she has barely anything to offer. Or both.

"My tie."

There is still room for improvement. And you want to undress the two of them as soon as possible.

You look at Ahin. She shifts around in her seat, about to give up. Unbeknownst to you, Nancy wiggles her eyebrows mockingly at Ahin, before slowly sliding her left hand over the table in your direction. Although Ahin doesn't mind sharing you, she doesn't want to give up without a fight.

"Guess I'm gonna start drinking again."

Ahin pours herself a glass, but not without her foot now resting on your knee.

"Isn't that a little unfair? You could drink the whole bottle and still be dressed."

"I doubt she can drink that much, Nancy."

The brunette shrugs her shoulders.

"We will see."

She takes a card from the pile next to the revealed cards. She smiles, before putting one of the old ones, face down, next to the pile.

"I keep going."

"And what are you going to bet?"

"My other sock."

Nancy watches you as you take the next card.

A three of clubs. At least it's a pair. If you are lucky, Ahin doesn't even have that.

"I bet a sock as well."

Ahin takes a card as well, before putting one back. She sighs, before reaching for Nancy's shot glass. She fills it without a word.

You look around, before you motion Nancy to show her cards.

With a smug grin, Nancy places her cards on the table. A king of clubs and an eight of hearts. Two pairs.

You show your own cards. A lousy pair of threes.

To your surprise, Ahin's face suddenly changes.

"Got you!"

With a laugh, she places her own cards on the table. A king of spades and a queen of hearts.

You sigh as you start to undo your tie. Nancy bends under the table, reaching for her socks. Her denim shorts are tightly hugging her cheeks, you turn your head, hoping Ahin didn't catch you staring. Leaning down as well, you take off one of your own socks.

Putting it on the table, next to Nancy's, you are surprised, when Ahin suddenly reaches for them and starts to put them on.

"What are you doing?"

"This is only fair. I started with a disadvantage."

Ahin puts on your sock and one of Nancy's. She let's your tie dangle from her shoulders.

Nancy reaches for the cards, ready to start dealing. You realize that this might not be as easy as you thought it would be.

"I bet my pants."

You look at Nancy. After winning her socks back, she lost them to Ahin again. You are already sitting in your chair without your tie and an unbuttoned shirt. You lost it to Nancy, but now you got it back.

"I bet my shirt again."

You look at your cards. You currently have a flush, confident that you are going to win this round.

"I bet my second sock."

Well, it's yours to be exact.

Nancy puts her cards on the table. A straight. You show your own cards. Nancy's smile drops and Ahin frowns again. Although, you don't really trust her face anymore.

Your girlfriend sighs and puts her cards down. Two pairs. You take your sock back, before turning to Nancy.

"Are you going to watch me take them off?"

You shrug your shoulders.

"Might as well."

"Fine."

You see her winking at Ahin, before standing up. Leaning back, you watch Nancy undo the button on the front. She turns around, bending forward.

You feel Ahin's toes glide over your crotch as Nancy slightly wiggles her hips. Turning back for just a moment, you see Ahin watching her as well. Her chin resting in her hand, her elbow placed on the table.

Nancy makes a show out of it. She slowly reveals her round butt, while slightly swaying her hips from left to right. Her thick thighs look invitingly delicious. Looking over her shoulder, she makes sure that you are watching. Her bottoms match her top. Blue and orange in the same pattern. Nancy's ass seems slightly fuller than Ahin's.

The brunette throws her denim pants onto your lap. Your girlfriend's foot is still doing small circles on your crotch.

Once she sits down, Nancy reaches for the cards, ready to shuffle them again. You have to look into Ahin's eyes, needing to tell her to stop moving her foot. She looks at you with fake innocence, smiling at you.

Nancy deals the cards. You look at yours. A king of hearts and an ace of hearts. A good start.

You see both of them smiling as well. Are they fooling you? Or do they actually have good cards?

Nancy reveals the five cards in the middle. Looks like you have won this round. Time to finish this game quickly.

"I bet my shirt, my pants and Nancy's shorts."

You pretend to hide your grin, hoping the two of them would think you are bluffing. Ahin scoffs.

"You seem really confident."

You shrug your shoulders.

"Fine."

Ahin looks down on herself. She is still not wearing much.

"I bet my last sock."

Nancy shakes her head.

"You have to bet the same amount."

Your girlfriend glares at you.

"Alright. I bet both of my socks. And..."

She looks down on herself again.

"And my bottoms."

Finally you are getting somewhere.

"What are you doing?"

Nancy looks at her with suspicion.

"What do you mean?"

Ahin fakes her innocence once more.

The younger one rolls her eyes, before looking at her cards. After seeing the two of you bet so much. And after watching Ahin take another card, she eventually does the same.

"I bet my..."

It's her turn to look down on herself. You hide your smile as you see her face when she realizes she isn't wearing enough clothes.

"I... I bet my top and my bottoms."

Ahin shakes her head.

"One more."

"I don't have anything."

"That sucks for you."

You honestly don't quite understand, why the two of them have started to become so competitive. If this is about having sex with you, wouldn't it be smarter to lose first?

"Than I'm gonna..."

Nancy realizes that you already brought the tequila to safety, after Ahin lost a round and had to take three more shots. You gave her water, which made her feel a little better. Sleeping with a drunk woman isn't the same as with a sober one. Plus, it feels like you would take advantage of her. But now, Ahin seems alright again.

"No alcohol anymore."

Nancy looks at you after your comment.

"Fine."

She glances at your crotch, before looking at Ahin.

"I bet my mouth."

A slight smirk plays around her lips.

"What?"

Ahin's voice is a little louder than usual.

"If you win, I'm gonna eat you out."

Nancy says that as if she has done that a hundred times already.

"If your boyfriend wins..."

She trails off, but places her left hand on your thigh.

You feel yourself harden underneath Ahin's foot at the thought.

"We said we would only bet clothes and tequila."

She definitely felt it too.

"So what?"

Nancy faces you.

"You have almost more clothes on than the two of us combined. Which means, we will need something to make it fair, right?"

Ahin senses your inner conflict. Of course you want to side with your girlfriend. But a blowjob from her model like friend?

Before you can speak up, you hear Ahin's voice.

"Fine. I will raise you though. I bet my top, too."

She reaches behind her and pulls at the bow on her back. Ahin's bikini top comes loose. Except for a little more cleavage, it doesn't reveal much more, still held up by the thin straps on her shoulders. But the message is clear.

"It's not your turn y-"

You try to ease the tension, but you are interrupted by Nancy.

"I offer my thighs."

You turn towards her.

"You can touch them, fuck them,"

Her voice suddenly turns into a whisper.

"Cum on them."

"Yah!"

Ahin looks at her with fire in her eyes.

"Nancy Jewel Mcdonie!"

Is that her full name? For some reason, her name makes Nancy seem even sexier.

"What is it Ahin?"

She glares back at your girlfriend.

"I-I"

She stutters, trying to come up with something.

"I will- I will let you fuck my throat. You can cum as often as you want."

Nancy scoffs, while you try to remain calm. What is happening right now? Are the two of them doing this because they actually want you, or just because they don't want to lose to each other?

"That's boring, girl."

Nancy leans forward to push Ahin's foot out of your lap. She places her hand on your clothed cock, squeezing it slightly.

"You can have my pussy. Fuck me all day, baby."

Her brown eyes stare into yours as she bites her lip. For just a second, you are entranced by her, before Ahin jumps out of her chair.

"Yah!"

She takes your chin and turns your head towards her.

"Use me. Use my body all night. Do whatever you want with me."

Ahin leans forward, her lips next to your ear.

"Every hole you want."

"Girls, I-"

And once again, Nancy interrupts you.

"That's lame."

She places her hand over Ahin's and makes you face her.

"I will ride you. I'm gonna rock your world and you don't have to lift a finger. You can just enjoy my pussy."

She leans forward too, whispering into your ear, just like Ahin.

"No one has ever been in my ass before."

You finally take both of their hands and remove them from your face. Ahin seems to think about more stuff she could bet.

"I will let your cream pie me. Breed me."

She looks at you, trying to act innocent again.

"Please?"

"Both of you stop it. I-"

Nancy quickly disappears underneath the table. Before you can react, the brunette is kneeling in front of you, her hands undoing your belt.

Looks like you won this round in more ways than one.

Ahin is visibly trying to do something too. But is not quite sure, what exactly.

"You weren't lying, Ahin."

You hear Nancy's voice under the table as she pulls off your pants and traces the length of your clothed cock with her finger.

"Why would I?"

You look at Ahin, who is still trying to think about a way to beat her friend.

"Wow."

Nancy coos as she pulls down your boxers.

Your girlfriend suddenly whispers into your ear.

"Remember the rules?"

You immediately reach down. You stop Nancy from kissing your cock by grabbing a fistful of her hair, holding her in place.

"You promised, you would never sleep with someone but me in this house."

"Hey..."

You blend out Nancy's voice, trying to remember that day in your office.

"No. You said, I'm not allowed to invite anyone over. Last time I checked, this was your idea."

You know that this was Ahin's only way of getting what she wanted. She pouts at you, releasing her poor choice of words.

Looking at her for a second, you come to a quick conclusion. This is not about who invited whom. It's about the respect you have for Ahin. You are not going to fuck anyone but her in this house.

"The pool?"

You wink at her and Ahin catches what you are implying.

She nods, a devilish grin on her lips.

"Would you let go of my-"

This time it's you who interrupts her. You get up from the chair, while letting go off her hair. Your pants fall to the floor, before you reach for Nancy under the table. She is barely taller than Ahin and not noticeably heavier.

Picking her up with ease, you feel Nancy's around your neck.

"Where are we going?"

She smiles at you, still thinking she won.

Unbeknownst to her, Ahin is rushing towards the glass door to open it. Before Nancy can react, she is already flying towards the pool.

With a loud splash, she hits the water, making Ahin the only contestant for your attention. Your girlfriend quickly gets rid off her top, before pushing you towards one of the wooden deck chairs.

As soon as you sit, Ahin is already sitting between your legs, leaning forward. Her lips touch your tip as she starts to stroke you.

"Fuck."

She kisses along your shaft.

"Why does this turn me on so much?"

You chuckle at her as she starts to take your cock into her mouth.

"Yah!"

You hear water splashing. Looking over Ahin's head and her beautiful ass, you see Nancy at the edge of the pool.

"That's cheating!"

With her mouth full, Ahin is unable to reply. But she shakes her head vigorously, making yours roll back.

"Ahin..."

You groan as she keeps going. Reaching forward, you have to hold her head in place. A week ago, Ahin found one of your soft spots. Since then, she started to use it to her advantage, whenever she needed you to cum quickly.

Just like right now. You keep her face pressed into your crotch, so she can't do anything. That results in Ahin choking as you stuff her throat with cock.

Nancy gets out of your pool, her body dripping wet. Her wet hair makes her look more mature and that small drop on her nose almost makes you laugh.

Once she reaches the two of you, she gives Ahin's naked ass a playful slap. It makes your girlfriend's body rock forward, making her take even more of your cock. You watch how her full cheeks absorb the impact.

"Since Ahin is busy with her mouth, let me use yours."

Nancy bends down, giving you a nice view of her ample cleavage, before capturing your lips with hers. You taste a faint hint of tequila on them as Nancy forces her tongue into your mouth. Unwilling to let her get the best of you, you pull her on top of you. The brunette stumbles forward, crashing into you.

You hear a muffled protest from Ahin, but you are too busy making out with Nancy. Your hands explore her wet skin as you let them glide along her waist and her back.

While your tongue explores her mouth, you hands start to get used to her body as you girlfriend's friend lies on top of you. You feel her chest pressing against you, her hand in your hair.

The two of you eventually have to break away for air.

"Those pictures Ahin send, don't do you justice."

Nancy starts to kiss your neck, her other hand sliding underneath your opened shirt.

"What kind of pictures?"

You are curious what Ahin says about you.

"A picture of you in a suit."

Nancy kisses your neck.

"A picture of you in the shower."

She gives you another peck.

"And a picture of your cock halfway down her throat."

The brunette looks up at you.

"I hope by the end of the weekend, I will have enough pictures for myself."

"Weekend?"

You thought she would stay to spend the night. At most.

"Yeah. More than enough time to take a picture of my face, covered in your cum."

You hear Ahin choking as you unconsciously thrust your hips upwards. The thought of cuming on Nancy's face makes you push Ahin's face further into your crotch with one hand, while the other starts to squeeze Nancy's tits over her top.

"You like them?"

You nod, before watching her pull her top up. It's now bunched up over her tits as she pushes her chest towards you. Opening your mouth, you capture one of her nipples, flicking your tongue against it.

Nancy moans, while you feel Ahin bobbing her head up and down. You enjoy her tits, switching between them occasionally. While Nancy keeps tugging at your hair everytime she moans, you realize that you might be coming to the end too early.

You slowly push Ahin off your cock, unable to defend yourself from one last lick of her tongue, which almost makes you cum.

"Ahin..."

You sigh, thinking she probably knows how close you are. She gives you a knowing grin, licking her lips.

"Switch places."

You try to buy some time, not wanting to cum too early.

You watch the two of them change position. Ahin is straddling your upper body, while Nancy starts to focus on your cock as she kneels in front of the deck chair.

To wonder, when Ahin possibly could have lost her top, is a waste of time. You immediately enjoy her naked chest as she leans forward. While you let your hands explore her mounds, your mouth is tasked to pepper the skin on her neck with kisses.

Your girlfriend moans as you find the spot that makes her melt. Her head is rolled back as you mark her skin while tugging at her nipples slightly.

Then, you feel Nancy's tits around your cock. They are bigger than Ahin's, but not big enough. You can feel her fingers on the upper side of your cock as she closes the gap. Her soft flesh around you feels warm and cold at the same time. Probably because her chest is wet, due to the water from the pool.

Nancy slowly starts to glide up and down along your shaft. Her tits squished together, making sure you enjoy the feeling of them wrapped around you.

At the same time, you start to take Ahin's nipples into your mouth. Just like Nancy did before, your girlfriend holds onto your hair with one hand, tugging at it occasionally.

"God yes."

She sighs as she feels your lips and tongue all over her chest. Her skin is a little softer than Nancy's.

The younger girl on her knees makes you groan as you feel her lips wrap around your tip. Everytime the tip of your cock leaves her cleavage, Nancy captures it with her mouth. Her tongue swirls around it, before she moves upwards again. Her steady rhythm suggests that this isn't her first time doing this.

You feel Ahin's biki bottoms rub against your abdomen as you keep pleasuring her. The slight wetness on your abs exposes her need for release as her clothing starts to become damp.

You realize that, since the night on Halloween, you weren't able to enjoy her pussy properly. Of course you fucked her since then, but because of your tight schedule, there wasn't much time to pleasure each other as much as you would've liked.

You place your hands on her thighs, slowly pushing her upwards. You see Ahin smirk on top of you as she realizes what you're doing. Your mind is still not completely on the task as Nancy makes sure you can't concentrate properly. Her ample tits wrap around your cock perfectly, the warm flesh makes you groan occasionally.

After a couple of moments, you finally get Ahin into the right position. Your hands are now placed on her cheeks, holding her up right in front of your face, while her legs rest on the backrest behind you.

You lick her bottoms, tasting her juices on the fabric, before looking up at her. Ahin's eyes glisten with lust as she sees you underneath her, ready to eat her out.

"Would you mind?"

It takes her a second to comprehend what you mean. With shaky fingers, Ahin clumsily undoes the ties on her bottoms. You can feel the heat coming from her body, especially her core.

You sometimes have a hard time believing that Ahin gets turned on by you fucking other women. But right now, with Nancy's tits wrapped around your cock, Ahin seems like a horny mess. Once her bottoms fall onto your chest, you see her lips glistening with her juices.

You pull her body further towards you, almost making her sit on your shoulders. Ahin moans as she feels your tongue licking her labia. Her hands are holding onto your hair as she tries to calm her body.

While you start to eat out your girlfriend, Nancy makes sure you can't focus properly. She kept up her rhythm the whole time up until now. Now, she is staying in place, her tits mostly wrapped around the lower half of your shaft. Her mouth is busy with sucking you off.

The combination of Nancy's mouth and tits around your cock is something you usually don't experience. It makes you groan, which sends shivers up Ahin's spine.

Your girlfriend is enjoying the feeling of you devouring her pussy, while her friend works your cock. Ahin's hair is a mess by now. It's hanging into her face, blocking the view. The rest of her body is starting to fail her as well. Her legs are starting to buckle. Her core is burning up and her breathing becomes faster.

While you slowly push Ahin towards her orgasm, Nancy has had enough of sucking you off. In contrast to Ahin, you haven't given her pussy any attention at all yet. Seeing you eating out your girlfriend, makes Nancy even wetter. And jealous.

She quickly gets rid of her bottoms, before inserting a finger into her own pussy. It only takes her a couple of moments, until she is completely wet. After Ahin telling her so much about you, there is no way she can keep her eyes off your cock.

Nancy straddles you, while you bring Ahin towards her high.

"Fuck!"

Your girlfriend shakes as you make her cum. You hold her securely, since her position isn't really safe.

After Ahin's body relaxes, you are about to put her down. You suddenly feel Nancy's pussy lips tease your shaft.

Without having time to prepare yourself, your eyes roll back as Nancy sinks herself onto your cock.

"Gosh, that's big."

She moans as she feels her pussy getting stretched by your cock. It has been a couple of months since Nancy had a proper fuck. Her pussy immediately clenches tightly around you.

"You've got a great cock."

Nancy shuts her eyes as she keeps lowering herself onto you. You see Ahin looking over her shoulder at her friend, studying her facial expressions.

"You look so hot riding him."

You can't see Nancy, but you can almost hear her smirk.

"I promised I would ride him."

And so she starts. Her hips meet yours whenever she slams down. And you feel her hands pushing against your abs whenever she pushes herself upwards. Her walls wrap around your cock like a sleeve and you are unable to do anything but lie in your chair.

You only realize that you are still holding Ahin, when you arms start to grow tired. With closed eyes, you try to put her down, not wanting to make her fall. You can almost feel Ahin stare at your face as she watches you. She bites her lip, loving the way your face twists in pleasure.

Once your girlfriend finally gets off of you, she returns her attention to Nancy.

"Oh my god. You are creaming all over him."

You open your eyes to verify Ahin's observation.

Your cock is slowly becoming covered with cream as Nancy is literally creaming. Her pussy feels tighter than before and yet she rides you more smoothly. Her head is tossed back, while her nails dig into the skin above your abs. Her mouth hangs open in a silent scream.

"This looks so good, baby."

Ahin leans over you again, capturing your lips with hers. The kiss is messy. There is not a hint of affection and love. Only lust and desire. Ahin slightly bites your lower lip, before you force your tongue into her mouth. Your hand is intangled in her hair, pulling her down to you.

The kiss becomes more sloppy, when you start to feel that familiar feeling inside your stomach. Nancy keeps riding you, her pussy keeps creaming around your cock, making it glide up and down on your shaft.

The young brunette has slightly changed her position. She is now squatting over you, her hands still on your abs. This way, she somehow manages to take even more of you inside of her.

You groan into the kiss, signaling Ahin that you are about to cum.

The sound of your phone ringing saves you. Not necessarily because you have to answer it, but it distracts you from Nancy's pussy.

"D-D you mind?"

You mumble into the kiss, while holding onto Nancy's hands, which are still pressing against your abdomen.

Ahin breaks the kiss to go back inside and get your phone. She can't help but watch though. She keeps her eyes on you and Nancy, while slowly walking backwards.

"Ahin..."

You motion her to hurry as you start to try to get Nancy off of you.

"I have to answer this."

As if she doesn't hear you, Nancy rides you like a crazy person. You can see how much cream she is leaking. Your whole cock is covered in it. It looks like you came in her, but you know you are barely holding on.

Finally, Ahin comes back with the phone.

"Nancy..."

She doesn't stop bouncing on you, while moaning occasionally.

"Let me take care of her."

Ahin hands you the phone, before attacking her ex bandmate. She holds her in place, while kissing her. You see her fingers rub on her clit.

"(Y/n) speaking."

Nancy's eyes are shut as Ahin plays with her, while covering her mouth with her own.

"Hello. I'm Cho Won-tae. I'm afraid we have to reschedule our meeting."

You close your eyes, unable to watch the two girls on top of you.

"That's-That's alright. What date and time do you have in mind?"

You feel Nancy tensing up around you as you hear her muffled moans.

"What do you think about Sunday?"

"I think that should work."

You almost groan as you feel Nancy's pussy clenching onto you, while Ahin keeps rubbing her clit.

"I don't have my calendar with me at the moment, though. Let me come back to you, once I've checked which time works for me."

"Alright then. I will be awaiting your call."

In that exact moment Nancy decides to cum. Her body shakes on top of you. Her walls hug you tighter than before.

"God! Fuck!"

You hear her muffled scream as she orgasms.

You do your best to hold on. And to be quiet. You can't afford getting caught by the CEO of Korean Air.

As Nancy's pussy contracts around you, you try to finish the call as fast as possible. Once you are able to hang up, you throw your phone away before holding onto Nancy's thighs. She has come down from her high, looking slightly out of it, while Ahin stands beside her.

"What was that?"

"I-I couldn't help it."

She sighs breathlessly, her skin slightly covered in her sweat.

"I can't help this either."

You sit up, pushing Nancy off of you. She stumbles to her feet. But before she can say anything, you turn her around and bend her over the chair.

"Be quiet and take it."

You push yourself inside of her again, rocking her body forward. Nancy moans as you start to fuck her from behind.

After a couple of thrusts, you realize she is having too much fun for your taste.

"Ahin."

You motion for her to walk in front of Nancy.

Your girlfriend gets the hint, sitting down on the chair right in front of Nancy's face.

"Make her cum. And maybe I will forgive you."

Ahin's eyes sparkle with amusement and lust as she sees Nancy lowering her head. Moans start to leave her mouth once she feels her friend's tongue pressing against her clit.

You reach forward, holding Nancy by her neck, while pushing her further into Ahin. Driving your cock in and out of her, you slowly start to feel that familiar feeling again. It subsided, when you got the call, now it starts to come back. You let out your frustration on Nancy for not being able to cum earlier.

Ahin has to hold the brunette's head in place while you pound into her. Her tongue is barely able to keep up as you push into her again and again.

Nancy is a mess by now. The cocky poker player is gone.

Whenever you retreat out of her pussy, you see how she is creaming on your cock. The natural lubricant helps you to fuck her harder. To fuck her deeper.

Your hands start to leave red marks on her hips as you keep pulling her body towards you while you thrust forward.

"Oh god! Please!"

You hear her moan loudly. But this time it's not muffled by Ahin's mouth, but her pussy. Your girlfriend is obviously enjoying this as you see her head rolling back. Her pink hair is flowing down her back while she bites her lip, trying not to moan.

The feeling of your upcoming orgasm increases as you keep fucking Nancy from behind. You dig your nails into her pale skin, leaving small marks on her waist. After a couple of more thrusts, Nancy has given up on pleasuring Ahin. Her head is flopping around to the rhythm of your thrusts, while her hair is flying in all directions.

Ahin is trying to make herself cum with her fingers, while watching you fuck Nancy's brains out.

"Almost there!"

Ahin's lips move, but it sounds like Nancy said it. Or did they both?

You concentrate on the task at hand. Making Nancy climax and then cum on her thighs. Like she promised. You had your eyes on them as soon as you heard her offer. Her pale skin and full flesh more than just inviting you to paint them.

"You fuck her so good!"

Ahin cums first. She arches her back as she plunges her fingers inside her pussy one last time. A high pitched moan escapes her lips as her pussy contracts around her fingers.

Only a couple of thrusts later, Nancy joins her friend in her orgasmic state. Her head falls onto the chair as her knees buckle. She cries into the chair as she cums hard on your cock. You feel her pussy squeezing your cock again and again. It makes you light headed.

And it makes you cum too.

You pull out, before flipping Nancy over. Lying on her back, her head rests in Ahin's lap as you tower over her.

You jerk yourself off with two last pumps, before shooting your load. Nancy's thick thighs get hit by your cum as you stain her pale skin. The brunette moans as she feels your hot seed on her body.

"How are you doing this?"

Ahin asks as she cums on your cock again.

It's Sunday now. Nancy has stayed the weekend. Like she promised. The two of them did their best to distract you from work. And to fuck you.

When you finally finished work on Sunday evening, you closed the deal with Korean Air, cream pied Ahin at least thrice and came almost on every part of Nancy's body.

You are unable to answer Ahin's question now as Nancy keeps riding your face. Her pussy hungry for release, her hips bucking towards you.

Ahin is riding you, just like Nancy did two days prior. Instead of lying on the chair, you are lying on a towel on the wooden deck.

The two girl's riding becomes faster. One of them tries to make herself cum, while the other tries to make you cum.

Nancy almost suffocates you with her thighs as she orgasms on your face. Her juices leak out of her as her mouth pronounces the lewdest sounds.

You feel yourself close to climaxing as well. You reach around Nancy, trying to find Ahin's waist. Once you get a hold of it, you lift Ahin up and down in your own rhythm. It's way faster and harder than how she rode you a second ago.

"Fuck, yes! Use my pussy!"

The weekend has been great. You finished all your work, are now the proud owner of an airline and had sex with Ahin and Nancy more often than you could count.

"Give her all your cum. I want to have some, too."

Nancy coos, while her thighs rub against your head. Her pussy is still hovering right above you. You lick at it, unable to resist your urge to make her cum again. The reaction is immediate as Nancy hisses.

At the same time, Ahin becomes undone around your cock. Her pussy twitches, contracts and tries to milk the cum out of you. You finally give her what she wants. As Ahin shakes on top of you, you paint her insides with cum. You see stars as you feel Nancy's thighs around your head simultaneously.

You will be definitely having breakfast by the pool tomorrow morning.

______________

Hello everyone!

Hope you enjoyed this chapter. You can keep requesting until next weekend, then I'm going to start the polls for the December special.

[nostalgebraist-autoresponder]

please give me a list of weed strain names

Green Magic

Black Death

Diesel

Shredder

Joint

Big Bertha

Pigeon Shit

Blunt

Majestic

Lodi

Ollie

Lunacy

Curse of the Green Hell

Cannabitch

Runt

Chocolate Covered Crackers

Black Cat

Marijuana

Aero

Shit

Grin

The Original Haze

White Death

Cotton Candy

Kush

Purple Haze

Cheesy

Dwarf's Gummy

Cheeto

Waka

White Girl

Cannabis

Shitpile

Crunk

Head Bitch

Wacky Water

Kushie

Ozomatli

Fantastica

Lunacy

Shroom

Lemon Demon

Door Hanger

Blunt

Joint

Wad

Blueberry

Chonk

Suck

Chill

Swisher's Edge

Purple Haze

Tango

Cookie

Boner

Dwarf

White Guy

Muffin

Blunts

Shroomie

The Joint

Lunacy

Dwarf's Gummy

White Girl

Green Crack

Dank

Skunk

Purple Skunk

Sativa

Shroom

Blueberry

Gummy

Cookie

Cannabash

Slim Jim

Shitty

Runt

Shits

Gruv

Boner

Wad

Swisher's Edge

Suck

Oz

Nug

Joint

Shroomie

Chonk

Suck

Nug

Joint

Wad

Kush

Tango

Swisher's Edge

Shroomie

Chonk

Sucker

Grip

Fantastica

Blunt

Swisher's Edge

Boner

Grip

Fantastica

[visceravalentines]

picture late june. benson in ripped and frayed denim shorts and what's left of a metal tee he tore up to be comfy. armpits out. fresh cut on the hair. legs all scraped to hell bc he waded through some brambles this morning after a stray dog. randy at his shoulder, all bitten lips and blue tongue from a sucker he's been working over for half an hour. baseball cap. dirty white t-shirt because he had to mow the lawn before he could go play. smells like grass and diesel and sunscreen, freckles all over his cheeks and arms. still pale as fuck though, especially compared to benson. they haunt the drink aisle in the grocery store for fifteen minutes because randy's indecisive and benson's not picking for him this time and they're not leaving until he makes a choice. benson bounces his raspberry arizona in his hands and patiently watches randy peruse every single option. he's got all the time in the world for this pretty boy who outshines the sun. they've got nowhere to be, nothing to do. nothing but time. randy finally picks a pint of chocolate milk and benson nods once, walks him all the way to the car with his hand on the small of his back. they drive to the river with the windows down, sit on the bridge and throw rocks in the water til it gets dark. benson drives him home and they stop for a bite on the way. randy gets to make this decision too--anything but burgers. benson parks across the street, cuts the lights. puts the armrest up. when randy finally has to go or face the wrath of his mother, benson gets out of the car, pushes him up against the passenger's side and kisses him goodnight. takes fifteen minutes. randy sneaks up to bed with sun on his cheeks and cigarette smoke in his hair. benson leans against the car and watches until the light goes off upstairs.

[cowboy-heart]

'the first butch emerged from the channel'

(ID in read more)

[ID: an original poem titled 'the first butch emerged from the channel':

out of season Brighton pier / seagull shit crusted / fish out of water / skinned and dressed / like a boy in her father’s suit / swallowed like seawater / observed only by shuttered stalls / voices echo / echo from summer’s last choke / air stifles with the beginnings of cold tongue / the boy rolls her sleeves for her wrists to meet its taste / a haircut done with blunt kitchen scissors / hair scattered into the brown sea / her mother will mourn her when she is home.

a little girl / skips down the plankboard boulevard / holding sea salt and candy floss melting / in her cheek / spilt chocolate down the front of her / little white dress / she skips down / down / pulls off her dress and everything else / skips down / over the edge / skips down / to the bottom of the sea / returning home / still skipping to France / as her lungs fill.

her bedroom was just / the way she’d left it / mattress cupping its hands to hold her still / who took her? / what song did she hear? / did she know the person? / my baby came home that night but she didn’t / she was killed on Brighton pier / scissors severed her blonde waves and / she drowned in them / her eyes a wild spring storm / who took my baby? / fileted up her thighs / took out all that was inside / replaced it with something / old and rotten and urban / left her innards in the hallway hamper / I asked her what I should do with my baby’s guts and she / it / told me to take them to St Christopher’s hospice / who took my baby? / when was my baby taken from me?

it left my house / a hollow mouth / her bedroom perfectly preserved in / boyband posters / I sit on her bed / and wait for her to come home with / sand in her trouser pockets / ready to brush her hair tides goodnight / I sit on her bed / in our show room / when was the last time my baby came home? / when was the last time / that I braided her ocean? / I mourn / grieving stuck in my throat / like a winter cough / but I cannot bury her / for her flesh has been stolen / by a bull-dyke.

I am not a man / O, mother / I am not a woman / O, mother / I wear my father’s clothes better than he ever did / why do you insist on waiting for / a seaweed girl to come skipping home from the boardwalk / when your baby is still here? / O, mother / I need you / under my skin has always been constellations and diesel / just because I broke / your umbilical promise / why is it so easy for you to bury me alive? / under the sand?

why / why / why / would you rather your baby be dead and waterlogged / choking on Thames runoff / than different to what you had planned? / O, mother / I look for you everywhere / in every breast / in every mouth / O, mother / you didn’t want a daughter / you wanted a do-over.

by Ren H.

end ID].

[raatart]

a complete boycott list in alphabetical order

a complete list of companies / brands / franchises to boycott in support of palestine that i have been working on putting together for a while now.

remember to support your local businesses

stand with palestine against genocide

(Food & Beverages)

A

Activia

Acqua Panna

Akmina

Absolute Vodka

Algida

A&W

Aquafina

Alpro

Actimel

B

Burger King

Baskin Robbins

Ben & Jerry's

Bugles

Betty Crocker

Badoit

Becel

C

Coca Cola

Costa Coffee

Cadbury

Cheerios

Cheetos

Campbells

Calve

Cappy

Chiquita

D

Dominos

Dasani

Dunkin' Donuts

Doritos

Dr Pepper

Danone

Dolcela

Damla

Dogadan

E

Evian

Eden

F

Fanta

Frito-lay

Fruit by the Foot Roll Ups

Falim

Fresca

G

Gatorade

Greggs

H

Hardees

Haagen Dazs

Heinz Ketchup

Hershey's

Hard Rock Cafe

Heinz

I

Innocent

Israeli Fruits & Vegetables

J

Jacob's

Jaffa

K

KitKat

KFC

Kbueno

Kraft Mac & Cheese

Kellogg's

Kraft

L

Lipton

Lays

M

McDonald's

Mars

Marks & Spencers

Maggi

Marila

Monster

Mountain Dew

Mehadrin

Minute Maid

Milk Bar

M&M's

Magnum Ice Cream

Milka Chocolates

N

Nestle

Nestle Cereals

Nescafe

Nesquik

Nespresso

Nido

Nutella

Nature Valley

Nestle Milo

Nestle Carnation

Nestle Coffee Mate

Nestle Nestum

Nimbooz

Nestea

O

Orea

Original Shredded Wheat

P

Papa John's

Pepsi

Pringles

Pizza Hut

Perrier

Pillsbury

Popeyes

Pretty a Manager

Pure Life

Powerade

Popup Bagels

Q

Quality Street

Quaker

R

Redbull

Ruffles

S

Starbucks

Subway

Smartwater

Sweetgreen

Snickers

Sprite

Sabra

Sunkist

Strauss

Smarties

S.pellegrino

Schweppes

Sana

Sirma

Sara Lee

T

Toblerone

Tang

Twix

Tesco

Tropicana

U

V

Vittle

Volvic

W

Wall's

Walmart

Walkers

Wrigley's

X

Y

Z

7Up

(Clothing)

A

America Eagle

Adidas

Alo

Adina Eden Jewelry

B

C

Converse

Calvin Klein

Cat

Castro

D

Drew

Diesel

E

F

G

Good American

GAP

H

H&M

I

J

K

Kamili

L

Levi's

Lumberjack

M

Mango

N

Nike

O

Oasis

P

Puma

Q

R

River Island

S

Skims

Skinny Dip

St. Mark

Style Nadia

T

Timberland

U

V

Victoria's Secret

Vakko

W

We Wore That

Wyeth

X

Y

Z

Zara

(Beauty)

A

Aveda

Amika

Avon

Aussie

Aveeno

Always

Aesop

Ahava

B

Bobbi Brown

Blistex

Bath & Body Works

Britney Spears Fragrance

Becca

Biotherm

Beauty Blender

C

Clinique

Covergirl

Colgate

Calgon

Camay

CeraVe

Christina Aguilera Perfumes

Clean & Clear

Crest

CND

Cacharel

D

Dr. Jart+

Dove

Dettol

Darphin Paris

Dark & Lovely

E

Essie

Elidor

F

Fenty Beauty

Fair & Lovely

G

Garnier

Gillette

Glam Glow

H

Honest Beauty

Haci Sakir

Herbal Essences

Head & Shoulders

Hugo Boss

I

J

Jo Malone

Johnson & Johnsom

K

Kerastase

Kiehl's

Kylie Cosmetics

Kylie Skin

Kotex

L

L'Oreal

Lacome

La Roche-Posey

Lifebuoy

Lux

Lubiderm

M

Maybelline

MAC

Moroccan Oil

Maui

Matrix

Max Factor

N

Nyx

Neutrogena

Nivea

Nature's Beauty

Niely

O

Olay

Origins

Orkid

Oral-B

Oax

P

Pepsodent

Pantene

Q

R

Revlon

Rimmel

Rexona

Rhode

S

Summer Fridays

Schick

Smashbox

Sephora

Sensodyne

Skinceuticals

Skin Better Science

T

The Body Shop

Too Faced Cosmetics

The Ordinary

Tom Ford Beauty

Tampax

Takami

U

Urban Decay

Ulta Beauty

V

Vichy

Vaseline

Veet

W

X

Y

Yes to

Yuesai

Z

(Luxury)

A

B

C

Chanel

D

E

Estee Lauder

F

G

Georgio Armani

H

I

J

K

L

LVMH

Louis Vuitton

La Mer

Lavs

Le Labo

M

Mugler

Maison Margiela

N

O

P

Prada

Q

R

Raplh Lauren

S

T

Tiffany & Co.

Tom Ford

Tommy Hilfiger

U

V

Valentino

W

X

Y

Yves Saint Laurent

Z

(Tech & Entertainment)

A

Aol

Amazon

AirBnB

Apple

B

BBC

Buxton

Barbie

Booking.com

C

CNN

D

Disney+

Dell

E

Energizer

F

Ford

Fiverr

G

Galaxy

H

HP

Hyundai

Hulu

I

IBM

Intel

J

K

L

Lego

M

Motorola

Movenpick

Mattel

Microsoft

N

National Geographic

Nokia

Netflix

O

Oracle

Oxi

P

Philips

Q

R

Rolls Royce

S

Siemens

Sodastream

T

Toys R Us

U

V

Volvo

Valvoline

W

Wix

X

Y

Z

(Other)

A

Axa

Ariel

Aero

Ambi Pur

Airwick

Aroma

AVC

Amway

Ace Hardware

Andrex

American Express

B

Bounty

Black & Decker

Bonux

Bref

Braun

Benadryl

Band-aid

Barclays

Blue Cross Blue Shield

Better Help

C

Caltex

Chevron

Culligan

Citi Bank

Chicco

Cravola

Clearblue

Capital One

D

Dash

Drynites

Dosmestos

Doona

E

Expedia

F

Finish

Febreeze

Fixodent

Fairy

G

Goop

Gerber

Gys

H

HSBC

Huggies

Hayat

I

Imodium

J

JCB

K

Kimberly-Clark

Kleenex

L

Lion

Little Swimmers

Lenor

M

Mr Muscle

Minidou

Monsanto

N

Nicorette

O

Omo

P

Pampers

Purina Felix

Payoneer

Palmolive

Protex

Pull-ups

P&G

Prima

Pril

Paramount Pictures

Q

R

Rejoice

Rinso

Rogaine

S

Signal

Sensus

Sudafed

T

Tide

U

Unilever

Us Cellular

V

Vim

Vanish

Vicks

W

X

Y

Yumus

Z

(Places)

A

B

C

D

Disney

E

F

G

H

I

J

K

L

M

N

O

P

Q

R

S

T

U

V

W

X

Y

Z

(People)

A

Ashley Tisdale

Amy Schumer

Andy Beshear

B

Bono

Ben Savage

Bella Thorne

Beyonce

C

Chris Evans

Claire Holt

Ciara

Chris Rock

Chris Pine

D

Demi Lovato

Dwayne Johnson

DJ Khaled

E

Eva Longoria

F

G

Gal Gadot

H

I

Ian Somerhalder

J

Jamie Lee Curtis

James Maslow

Justin Bieber

Jennifer Aniston

Jaclyn Hill

Jack Harlow

Jordan Peele

Joseph Quinn

Jack Black

K

Kylie Jenner

Kim Kardashian

Kris Jenner

Kerry Washington

Katie Perry

Karlie Kloss

Khloe Kardashian

Kat Graham

Kendall Jenner

Kourtney Kardashian

L

Lebron James

Lana Condor

Lana Del Rey

M

Millie Bobby Brown

Malala

Mindy Kaling

Mark Hamill

Madonna

N

NFL

Nina Dobrev

Natalie Portman

Nabela

Nicole Richie

Noah Schnapp

O

Octovia Spencer

P

Perez Hilton

Paul Wesley

Phoebe Tonkin

Pia Mia

P!nk

Q

R

Ronaldinho

Rihanna

S

Sofia Richie

Shaquir O'neal

Selena Gomez

T

Tara Strong

Taika Waititi

Taylor Swift

Tyler Perry

U

Usher

U2

V

Vanessa Hudgens

Viola Davis

W

X

Y

Z

[stonedcoast]

Heady Tropper, and Family

Heady Tropper! The King's Stache! Get some!

SativaHigh THC (26% – 30%)Flower While I feel like I have so much to say in my preamble this week, since last Monday morning, I have been straight out, and so I think I’ll just be sappy for a bit and then get to the review. But briefly, what was so busy about this week? Multiple days at work with extended hours, family friends visiting for the week (who also have kids), my brother’s birthday,…

[margowritesthings]

The Greatest Gift A Cowboy Could Ask For

a @rdrevents winter gift exchange for @cowboydisaster

SERIES MASTERLIST

pairing: Arthur Morgan x pregnant!f!reader word count: 3215 words warnings: teeth-rotting fluff, pregnant reader, labour, birth a/n: Bea! i cannot BELIEVE i got you for my winter exchange but i was SO HAPPY when the email came through! I tried to combine all three of your prompts and then proceeded to lie to you for a month about what i was writing for gift exchange whoops

anyway, merry christmas my love! this year i met you and im so glad i did! you're such a lovely soul and such a talented writer and i hope you enjoy this!! <3

tagging: @cowboydisaster @cassidylynnj @inkandbloodbound @counteveryfreckle @reaveries @elifsukirdaghehe @musicallisto

It’s the smell that wakes you up, that sweet aroma you instantly recognise as drinking chocolate. For a moment, it disorients you, because Pearson never has drinking chocolate in, but your eyelashes soon flutter open and your mind registers that you’re right where you should be: yours and Arthur’s shared tent. You’re alone, the bed beside you cold enough to know that Arthur has been up for a while, so you reach over to the gold pocket watch you stole from that poker player with the shifty eyes in Blackwater all those months back, finding the time to be 37 minutes past 9.

“Shit…” You’ve slept in. Normally, you’d lurch up, throwing on your boots and clothes and rushing out to catch up on chores, but you physically can’t anymore. Your swollen belly restricts any and all quick movements, that usual ache waking up and settling right in your spine. It’ll stay there all day, it always does nowadays. 

It’ll be worth it, you reassure yourself, imagining Arthur holding his child, the one you made with him, in those big strong arms, loving it unconditionally, and the ache somehow doesn’t seem so bad, after all. There’s a weird feeling that remains that you can’t quite put your finger on, but you can ignore it enough to get on with your day, you think.

Slowly, you sit up, wrapping a woollen blanket around your shoulders to protect you from the chill of the December air. When Ms. Grimshaw found out you were pregnant, she hounded Dutch until he set you and Arthur a proper tent up, which your eyes scan over now. The cup of chocolate is still steaming and when you wrap your hands around it, the heat radiates through your hands and settles in your core when you sip. It tastes so good, the rarity of such a treat only making it better. You smile to yourself, picturing Arthur leaving it there for you to wake up with and sneaking around as to not wake you, the big old brute. 

It takes you far too long to get ready nowadays, but in time you do, pulling three pairs of socks over your swollen ankles to protect your feet from the cold. Your boots are tricky to get on thanks to your 8 month bump, but you eventually manage to do it and stand up all by yourself. What a morning of achievement. And all before 10AM… just about.

═══════☆═══════

The snow crunches under your feet as you pull your coat tighter around you and step outside onto Horseshoe Overlook. Your breath dances in the air whenever you exhale while surveying the camp and your brows knit together when you don’t spot Arthur. You can see his horse by the hitching posts, munching from the trough, but Diesel, your own steed, is nowhere to be seen. You’re not concerned, Arthur has started alternating between Diesel and his mare since you became too pregnant to ride him yourself, but that doesn’t stop you from missing the both of them. 

“Auntie y/n!” As usual, you hear Jack before you see him and you just about jump out of your skin when you feel his little arms hug around your leg. You have no idea how he manages to sneak up on you every damn time, and by god does it make you nervous for when your own child can crawl out of sight, but you laugh nonetheless, ruffling his hair like you so often do when you see him.

“Y’alright there, Jack?” You look down to the boy, actually having to peer over your belly to see him beaming up at you. 

“Yep! Santa’s coming tomorrow and mama said if I’m good and I put one of my socks outside tonight I’ll get presents.”  He’s so excited he can hardly stay still, releasing his hold on you to shuffle from foot to foot restlessly. Looking at Jack, you can see your future. You see Arthur reading Christmas stories to your own son or daughter before bed and bribing them with presents every time they misbehave in the entire month of December. The magic of Christmas is alight in Jack’s innocent little eyes, unburdened by any of the shit the adult members of the Van der Linde gang have to worry about. And you just can’t wait to share that magic with your own little family.

“Is that so?” You raise an eyebrow questioningly at Jack, crossing your arms and resting them on your belly gently,

“Uh huh! She said we have to leave room at the hitchin’ post for his reindeer, too. I told Uncle Arthur so he leaves space when he gets back with Diesel.” Now he’s stepped back, you can see just how red the tip of Jack’s nose is, despite the four scarves Abigail seems to have wrapped him in.

“You saw Uncle Arthur this mornin’?” Your curiosity piques at the mention of your husband and his curious ongoings. Jack nods, but looks off to the side, much less eager to talk about this subject.

“Uh huh. But he made me promise not to tell you where he went.” He can’t seem to fight off the smile pulling at his near-blue lips and it's goddamn adorable, but it doesn’t stop you from at least attempting to corrupt this child’s promise, planting your hands on your hips.

“Oh, yeah? What about if I had a word with Santa for you, huh? Ask if he can bring ya’ an extra chocolate bar?”

So this is what it’s come to, huh?

Bribing a 10 year old… 

Forshame, Mrs. Morgan.

═══════☆═══════

It’s another hour before you find out where Arthur is. Jack doesn’t break under interrogation and you make a mental note to let his Uncle Dutch know what an asset he is to the gang. Pearson makes you bacon and eggs even though you missed breakfast on orders from both Arthur and Grimshaw to never let you go hungry in your condition. The strange feeling from when you woke up doesn’t seem to budge even with a full stomach, but that thought is pushed out of your head when you see a dog, covered in snow, burst past Charles keeping watch and come barreling towards you. You don’t have time to react or figure out what the hell is going on before there are wet paws on your lap and a fluffy, panting smile only inches away from your face.

“MOOSE! Get back here, Moose!” Arthur’s voice bellows through the camp and you can hear Diesel's gallop, but you can’t seem to see anything but dog as the hound in front of you grabs the last piece of bacon from your plate and begins licking your face.

Somehow, Arthur runs over to you and grabs who you assume to be Moose, picking him up with an ease that only his strong arms could take. You seem to be frozen in shock, your mind working triple speed to catch up with your surroundings. 

Okay, what can you feel?

My face is wet.

What can you see?

My husband, holding a 50lb dog like it’s a baby.

What about smell?

Not sure, but it definitely isn’t my last piece of bacon.

“God, darlin’, are you alright? Did he hurt’cha?” Arthur’s concern is evident, wrinkling his forehead with worry as he puts the dog back on the floor, who has considerably calmed now that there is no more bacon. Arthur takes a few strides before he’s in front of you, kneeling beside you to take your face in his huge gloved hands and wildly scan his eyes over your features. 

“I’m fine, I’m fine. The only casualty was my breakfast.” At 8 months pregnant, it’s hard not to find that completely and utterly tragic, but at least your baby is safe.

“That damn dog… I should’a listened when the guy told me he’s got a mind of his own.” Satisfied of a lack of wounds to your person, Arthur stands, holding out both hands to help you up too. You fall into his embrace perfectly, finally feeling the relief of the first contact with your beloved for the day. It makes everything feel that much better, that much safer in his arms that you hum contentedly.

“Mornin’, sweetheart.” Arthur whispers into your hair, placing a kiss right atop your head, “Good morning…” you sigh out, basking in the bubble that’s forming around the two of you, as if you’re the only ones in the world. “Thanks for the chocolate this morning.”

“My pleasure.”

You both stay there for a while, swaying in your embrace, until you eye what’s going on around you and have to break the moment.

“...Arthur?” “Yeah?” “Why is there a dog eatin’ one of Dutch’s books?” “Ah shit… Moose! NO.” Arthur all but barks, his arms slipping from your waist to retrieve Moose. He slips a rope around Moose’s collar, which seems to calm him quite a bit, enough to be able to lead him back over to you. Now the excitement has died down, Moose sits beside Arthur, doting up at you with the epitome of ‘puppy dog eyes’.

Alright… it’s pretty damn cute.

And when Arthur sheepishly rubs the back of his neck, you know he’s yours. You can read your husband like a book.

“I, uh… The other month y’said you’ve always wanted a dog, and I figured it'd be easier to get a dog then a baby rather than the other way around and… and well you’re giving me so much this year, more than I can ever repay and… well, merry christmas, Mrs. Morgan.” His nervous ramblings that only you seem to have the ability to enable are a pleasure to watch. They grow your grin by the second, as does the goofiest dog you’ve ever seen smiling up at you. You’re so happy you could burst, though you certainly wouldn’t want to in your state. You’re completely speechless for a second.

“You’re… you’re not mad, are ya?” “I mean, I ain’t never heard’a somethin’ so bold as gettin’ a new dog a month before givin’ birth, but no. I… I love him. Thank you, Arthur.” You reach onto your tiptoes to throw your arms around his neck as best you can with a baby between you, kissing Arthur with enough force for him to drop the makeshift leash in complete distraction. Moose feels his release happen and runs off again, this time finding and chasing Jack around in circles while he laughs madly. Arthur snakes an arm around your waist and you feel your head fit perfectly into the crook of his neck while you watch the chaos. 

“How’re y’feelin’ today? Still achin’?” “Uh huh… But I’m okay. Feel a little weird, but I think that’s normal at this stage.” You reply honestly, feeling the smallest bit of relief from the thumb circling your lower back.

“Well, take it easy, alright? I’ve done chores enough for the both of us.”

“Alright… Thank you.” You sigh, actually rather missing the hustle. You’re a ranch girl at heart who isn’t used to just sitting around, your decreasing list of things you can actually do nowadays getting more frustrating by the day.

“Not long to go now till we meet her now, angel.” “We don’t know for sure it’s a girl, cowpoke.”

“I know… I just gotta feelin’.”

═══════☆═══════

Later that evening, everyone in camp is sitting around the fire breathing like dragons as they sing christmas carols to Javier’s guitar and you’re tucked under Arthur’s arm, cuddling into him to keep warm. You’re pretty sure Moose hasn’t left Jack’s side all day. Not since he slipped him an entire bowl of stew at dinner, at least. 

The strange feeling of pressure that has been building in your abdomen all day hasn’t yet relented, but you haven’t yet found good enough cause to worry anyone about it. You’re 8 months along, surely you’re supposed to feel weird?

You’re the only one close enough to Arthur to know that he has absolutely no idea what the words to this song are. He’s mumbling along to the general tune, sounding a lot like Uncle’s slurs after a few too many whiskies. It takes everything in you to not snicker at his poor attempt to guess how many of which kind of bird or performer or… maid(?) this songwriter got for Christmas, especially when you’re pretty sure you hear the words ‘seven fish-a-shittin’ leave his lips. 

Everything is one fat man in a red suit away from being the perfect picturesque Christmas Eve, which you’re about to point out to Arthur when the sharpest stabbing pain rips a strangled cry from deep within your throat. Your hands shoot to your belly helplessly, wanting to grip at it to ease the pain but knowing you can’t. The carols are too loud for anyone but Arthur to notice, who instantly crouches in front of you.

“Sweetheart? What’s wrong?” He’s panicked, grasping at your arms and attempting to capture your attention away from the considerable pain you’re clearly in. Your face is scrunched up, teeth clenched down in some poor attempt to brace the pain.

“I… I don’t know. It hurts. Feels like pressure.. Right- argh!” 

This time, your cry is loud enough to gain the attention of those around the fire. Javier stops playing and most everybody looks over at you. Ms. Grimshaw and Dutch both stand, concern evidently written in their expression. 

“Is she alright?” Dutch asks,

“What’s happenin’, honey?” Grimshaw kneels beside Arthur in front of you. You try to breathe through the smallest hole your lips can make, focusing on the sensation as much as you can rather than whatever is happening to you. You’re trying your hardest not to worry about the baby, but it’s hard, especially with so many people now worrying about you out loud.

“I… dunno. Hurts.” You manage to get out, finding Arthur’s hand and gripping on it with a downright bruising force.

“C’mon, let’s get you inside and out of the cold, alright?” You nod, feeling Arthur holding onto one arm and who you assume is Dutch on the other helping you to your feet. You lean on them as much as possible and somehow you make it into your tent. You’re laid down on your cot just as the pain begins to subside and your lungs feel like they can open back up again. When your eyelids soften again, you see Arthur’s worried face right beside you, Grimshaw pottering around with towels and Dutch waiting by the entrance to the tent with Dr. Strauss.

“Darlin’? Y’alright?” The sheer intensity of the panic in his voice is almost more than you can bear and you know he’s being plagued by the same nightmare you are right now, just hoping to god or whoever the hell might be listening that your baby is okay.

“Mhm. S’easing now… It just came on real quick, that’s all…” Your breaths are struggled but ever so slightly more stable than before. Arthur’s thumb runs over your knuckles soothingly. 

Over by the entrance to the tent, you see Dutch and Strauss in a hushed conversation that frays your nerves something awful. “What’s happening, Arthur?”

“I… I don’t know, sweetheart. But you’re gonna be okay. I promise.”

Enter Dr. Strauss, carrying his medical bag. Arthur stays right by your side as the Doctor sits in front of your cot, mumbling his apologies as he lifts up your skirts and pulls a blanket over your legs.

You’re panicking, not knowing how you know exactly, but knowing that the pressure is going to come back soon. An awful anticipation clamps your hand onto Arthur’s tighter, but Strauss’ head pops up from under the blanket before it happens. Arthur’s head whips around.

“What’s happening, doc? Is she okay? Is… is the baby gonna be okay?”

The second between Arthur’s question and Strauss’ answer lasts a lifetime. It’s an agony worse than anything this pregnancy has thrown at you in all its 8 months in existence. 

“I believe you’re in labour, Mrs. Morgan.”

═══════☆═══════

It’s a long, hard labour but Arthur never leaves your side once. Not when your waters break, or when he can barely keep his eyes open. Not even when you almost break his hand the first time you try to push. He stays with you. 

He’s right beside you when you start to panic between contractions, tears falling down your reddened cheeks. “It can’t be here yet- we just got a dog and it’s only been eight months and I-I don’t know if I’m ready…” 

But he knows just what to say. Of course he does. He even brings Moose in to say hello and prove he has relaxed a lot since his first arrival.

He’s with you when you break, sobbing that you can’t push anymore, your forehead falling against his in pure exhaustion. “Shut up, stupid.” He scolds gently, earning a confused look from you. “You know damn well you’re the strongest woman alive and you can do goddamn anything. It’s one of the many reasons I fell for ya’. Now push, before I name this baby Hoagy after it’s Godfather.” 

He’s there when she’s born, such a tiny little thing, a month early but just as healthy as if she were overdue. He’s got that smug look on his face when Strauss announces her arrival, the loudest silent ‘I told you so’ you’ve ever seen. 

Arthur holds his daughter in his arms for the first time on Christmas Day, his eyes glistening in the candlelight. 

“She’s… She’s perfect. She’s so perfect…”

Your energy is depleted, truly, after so many hours of labour, but you manage to sit up against the makeshift crate headboard to watch your husband and daughter meet each other.

Her tiny hands reach out for Arthur, holding onto his cheek and if you could freeze time forever and live in this moment, you would.

“You’re incredible, you know that?” Arthur whispers, shifting to kiss her palm, “Isn’t she?”

“I mean… she is, but I was talkin’ to you.” He looks up at you and you decide not to mention the tear tracks you spot on his skin.

“Oh, hush…” There’s an attempt to wave him off, but your shaky limbs don’t quite manage.

“No, I mean it. You… You’ve given me everything. I never knew I wanted to be a dad, but now she’s here and I’m holdin’ her I…” He’s choking up in a way you’ve never seen before. The great outlaw Arthur Morgan, who has killed and robbed and beaten, breaking in front of you in the most beautiful, vulnerable way imaginable. “It’s everything. I can never thank you enough. This is the best gift I could ever get, my beautiful, amazing wife.”

His words radiate through you, relaxing your spine and calming each ache bringing life to the world has given you. You can feel your eyelids get heavier by the second and it gets harder and harder to fight the sleep you so desperately need.

“Arthur?” You’re barely audible, but Arthur is sat close enough to hear you,

“Uh huh?”

“We don’t have to name her Hoagy, do we?”

“We’ll talk about it later, angel.”

[jungle-angel]

Daddy's Little Helper (Rhett Abbott x Reader)

Summary: Ever since opening your own store, Amy's been yours and Rhett's biggest helper

Rhett stood waiting on the sidewalk outside the little farm store he had opened up with you several years before, the porch freshly swept, the rocking chairs rocking a little in the chilly October air as he waited for the bus from Amy's school to pull next to the sidewalk and let her off.

Sure enough, the little yellow bus from the Amelia County Steiner School pulled up and opened its doors to let Amy off, the five year old jumping off the last step and into Rhett's arms, happy and excited to be spending the rest of the afternoon with him at the store.

"Mommy have the babies yet?" she chirped.

"Nope, not till December, Doodlebug," he told her, holding her hand as they walked up the wooden porch steps.

He opened the front door, the little bell above the threshold ringing as they walked in, enveloped by all the smells of fall.

"What'd ya'll do at school today, Doodlebug?" he asked, prepping her after school snack.

"We made soup and bread for lunch," Amy answered. "And then we got to go outside and play in the woods."

"You gonna carve pumpkins soon?"

"Yeah!"

Rhett couldn't help but smile at her little giggles. Hearing them always seemed to brighten his day, even if they were already brighter than the sun itself.

The two of them spent hours in the store, prepping all the baked goods for the weekend and setting up the shelves full of cloth, beeswax, dyed wool, little hand tools and kits to put small craft items together. Unfortunately, Rhett had to keep Amy from sticking her fingers into the melted chocolate that was meant for some of the homemade Halloween candy.

"Alright Doodlebug, last one then we've gotta go home," Rhett told her as he lifted her up off her feet.

Amy carefully placed the little wicker basket of yarn on the top shelf, carefully sliding it into its spot before Rhett set her down. Once the lights were shut off and the doors locked for the night, Rhett loaded Amy into the truck and headed for home.

No sooner had he pulled into the turn-around in the driveway and gotten Amy out of her carseat, than Diesel came charging right for her, his big mug stretched into his dopey dog grin that rottweilers were known for.

Rhett gave him as many scritches as he possibly could before he shooed them both into the house. Hannah came waddling in from the living room as soon as he had kicked off his shoes, her little self scooped right up off the floor before Rhett littered her cheeks with kisses.

"Where's Nana honey?" he asked.

"Nana's in the kitchen!!!" Cecelia answered loudly.

All Rhett had to do was follow the scent of dinner cooking in the crockpot, some sort of beef dish that had been soaked in herbs, spices and red wine before being stuck right on a bed of veggies. Cecelia was busy cutting up the green beans for the sides, but was still happy to have the rest of the family in for dinner.

"How goes Grumpy?" she asked.

"Better than ever Ma," he answered. "It's Friday night, we can all relax and not worry about having to do anything tomorrow."

"Yeah well, your father and I are gonna have to open the store tomorrow since you're taking Amy and Hannah to the pumpkin patch," she told him.

"How's (y/n)?" he asked.

"Tired," Cecelia answered. "She's upstairs resting but I think the boys have a case of restless leg syndrome."

Rhett laughed a little before heading up the stairs to your shared bedroom. You were sat upright in bed, trying to plan your new main lesson block for the next four weeks with your fifth graders and to get the two little boys in your belly to stop kicking for two minutes.

"Ya'll doin ok Darlin?" Rhett asked, scooting in next to you.

"Well," you half chuckled. "I had to run home earlier than normal for a new pair of pants but I think I'm doing ok."

Rhett kissed your cheek and you kissed him right back on the lips. "Amy was a big helper this afternoon."

You hummed happily, melting right into your husband the same way the cats always did. "Maybe we can have her help once I'm on bedrest," you half laughed.

"I'm sure she won't mind," Rhett told you.

The two of you stayed like that for as long as you could, until Royal and Cecelia both called everyone in for dinner. Rhett helped you down the stairs, but despite the trouble, you were both only too happy to be surrounded by your family, the very people who loved you both the most.

[d3nt4l-d4m4g3]

This is a morbid question, but after going through your medical malpractice tags, I can't help but to wonder how many women have died from T? And also, does every TIF who does stay on T for long periods of time develop some sort of chronic pain/illness that you've read or seen?

It seems like its rare to hear from TIFs on T after 6+ years. It seems like they almost all quit or lower their dose substantially.

it's probably impossible to estimate how many women have died from taking T. Legally, many of these women are male and are registered in medical systems as male. From looking at a piece of paper, it's impossible to separate these women on testosterone from men on testosterone.

I don't know every trans person so I can't say with certainty that every single trans identified woman develops chronic pain or illness on T. That said, the sheer number of systems that testosterone touches—bones, heart, reproductive organs to name a few—means that the likelihood of developing at least one chronic illness/source of pain is extremely high. And it can happen over a short or prolonged period of time. You might never have the symptoms of vaginal atrophy, but your cortisol and blood pressure could be climbing every year. You might not have a heart attack, but you could develop psoriasis. Maybe your bones are dense enough but your pancreas is fried. Maybe your pancreas is fine, but you have shooting pains every time you orgasm.

if you think about it, it's like a box of chocolates.

I don't want to accuse all TIFs who profess perfect health after 10+ years of taking testosterone of being liars. Statistically, that's not true.

However, I think that there is a lot of pressure to uphold the narrative that cross-sex hormones are healthcare, and not a lot of incentive to admit those exact hormones can ruin health.

There isn't this same reservation when you're talking about chemotherapy, for example—would you tell a cancer patient that she might not puke during treatment? That she might not lose her hair? That her fertility may not be compromised? All of those maybes are technically correct. That patient may not suffer all of these things, or possibly any of them. But as a medical professional, as a friend, as a family member, as a patient, is it not responsible to say that what the medication does, is designed to do, "might not" happen.

Of course, chemo is temporary. It is a poison given to sick people to kill the bad hopefully before it kills too much good. Giving testosterone unnecessarily to healthy women, and indefinitely to boot, can only worsen health.

Even if there was a percentage of women who take large doses of testosterone with no pain or chronic illness over years—a percentage I doubt is significant—would you put diesel in a gas car? Would you drive on the highway like that? Would you be able to live with yourself knowing your family and loved ones are holding their breaths every night, waiting for a phone call that you have crashed? objectively, it's highly selfish to pretend the benefits outweigh the potential cost, the cost being one's life.

Going back to your point about the 6+ year mark—yeah, I do think by that time a lot of women detransition, live miserably as trans, or die quietly, away from the spotlight. Like an old dog not wanting to bring vultures to her body. There's no longer any thrill from being trans, but rebuilding your life, community, and body is terrifying and has real social consequences, so many stay in that limbo.

[sketch-pencilpoint]

The part 2 is finally here. The rest of my au steam team (Emily not included because 1. I am not as attached to her as the rest of the steam team and 2. She's not infected in my au anyway)

Bonus image and more notes under cut

Can can be seen, tender engines have longer, thinner legs with retractable claws (and dew claws) and long tails that match their fur. This is to differentiate them. Most engine types have these sorts of differences.

The rest of the main steam team was infected by a recently awoken and feral diesel (as in the character) who fought with thomas while they were all in tidmoth causing the others to get infected as well. This resulted in them also going a bit feral (which is a result from an engine feeling severe anger, fear or stress before the infection takes hold. Meaning its not very common) since they were that mad at thomas even if he wasn't at fault. It took a full month before they were all recovered.

Extra note, diesel was infected by salty (d rammed into s and got scratched) and salty by Thomas (volunteered to be potentially infected to help understand how the infection spreds)

Fun facts: thomas likes hunting, he is the most likely to continue to try to eat raw meat.

Edwards age doesn't really show. He even claims he hasn't felt this young in years.

Henry hates eating meat, though he loves fish. This is weird as literally every other steam engine hates fish and either refuses to eat them or hates the taste.

Gordon is the only one that hated his new form, and he did for a while. He was the last to be brought to sense when first infected.

James is in love with his fur. He loves wearing clothing and accessories outside of his designated work gear

Percy loves running now. He also likes eating hay and chocolate. He will not let thomas find this out

And yes they have work gear. It let's them get on with their old jobs. It's made from their sheaded metal bodies.

That's all for now. Again, like and reblog if the people want more monster engine content

[unpopularvivian]

Incorrect Ttte Quotes 233:

Duck: Can I have a strawberry ice cream?

Diesel: I'll order a vanilla ice cream.

Duck: *Looks at Diesel* YOU MOTHERFUCKER!!!!!

Duck: WHY DO YOU LIKE VANILLA?!??!?

Diesel: AND WHY DO YOU LIKE STRAWBERRY!?!?

*Unintelligible arguing breaks loose as the two began slapping each other*

Edward: HEY!!!

*Duck and Diesel both stop*

Edward: WHY THE BOTH OF YOU DON'T LIKE CHOCOLATE!?!?!?

Edward: I'M GONNA CUT YOUR DICK!!!!!

Duck: Ohfuckohfuckohfuckohfuckohfuckohfuckohfuck-

Diesel: I don't even have one...

Edward:

I'M

GONNA

CUT

YOUR

DI-

[cyber-corp]

By the time I'm posting this, it will be January 26th, commonly known as Australia Day where I'm from. A country known for its sweeping plains, unique fauna and the PM fucking off during a nationwide crisis.

I think, despite all Australia's long-standing issues, there are some things about it worth celebrating the culture. Specifically, the music!

Here are some of (what I think) to be some of the most quintessential Australian albums to listen to:

Midnight Oil - Diesel and Dust (1987): Quite possibly the most Aussie album from quite possibly the most Aussie band. The biggest song off of this album, Beds are Burning, is about Aboriginal Australians being forcibly removed from their land, and the lead singer Peter Garrett is really outspoken about justice towards Australia's native peoples, even being in Parliament at one point. Listen if you want to hear what Rage Against the Machine would be like if they were a new wave band and regularly consumed Oak chocolate milk.

INXS - Kick (1987): If the UK had new wave, Australia had pub rock. Artists defined by their songs being so infectious you can remember while you're smashed on seven bottles of Tooheys Extra Dry (kidding. it's called pub rock because that's where they'd play their sets. in pubs). INXS is quite possibly the pub rock band, the genuine article, and this album is a nice gateway into their music; Punchy, upbeat, and memorable riffs for days. (Songs like Need You Tonight and New Sensation for a good idea). Listen if you like Duran Duran or The Cars.

Kylie Minogue - Fever (2001): GOD, how do I introduce Kylie. This country's shining grace. The superstar in our backyard. Our very own Princess of Pop. This album just extrudes that gleam and optimism that'd you find in a lot of Y2K dance-pop music, and I absolutely love it. Listen if you like Discovery-era Daft Punk or Grace Jones.

The Avalanches - Since I Left You (2000): My personal favourite off this list. It might not be the most "Aussie", but I think it makes up for it in its ethereal tone and sampling techniques. One song might just be made up of just one sample, while another might be made up of 50, (Frontier Psychiatrist was originally made up of 28 samples), but it's all tied together by this collective lofi sound. Listen if you like DJ Shadow, Portishead, or The Chemical Brothers.

Regurgitator - Unit (1997): There was this period in the 90's where Australian alt-rock went fucking berzerk, and Regurgitator was one of those bands. Everyday Formula opens with "Everyday I shit into the sea" and ! (Song Formerly Known As) is about not going out to parties and staying at home. Listen if you'd like Gary Numan mixed with the subject matter of early Weezer.

Spiderbait - Grand Slam (1999): Spiderbait was another one of the alt-rock outlets that got really popular despite being really vocal about the hypocrisy of the industry at large. This album contains a wide variety of influences, like 60's bubblegum on Glockenpop (song about the needless commodification of music. their most popular song and highest-earning single of that year. lol), pop punk on Dinner Time and hard rock on Shazam! A pretty good all-rounder made brilliant by vocalist Kram. Listen if you like Green Day or No Doubt.

Empire of the Sun - Walking on a Dream (2008): I put this one on because the cover is really funny, but then I listened to the album and I got a sense of bittersweet nostalgia listening to it. A mix of disco, dance-rock and funk (We Are The People is a good example) make for something that made me wish I was 7 again. Listen if you like Prince or Let's Dance-era Bowie.

TISM - Machiavelli and the Four Seasons (1995): TISM (short for This Is Serious Mum) are a fucking disgrace to this country. They are such a bunch of yobbo cunts that I can't believe they managed to get anywhere past 90 on the charts. Wankers like them deserve to be dragged out on stage and beat to a pulp viciously, to the ravenous delight of the crowd. Don't listen to this album and don't listen to Greg! The Stop Sign!! Listen if you're a masochist, maybe.

AC/DC - Let There Be Rock (1977): Ah yes, good ol Acca. The ultimate dad band. You could put any of their albums on this list because they all sound the exact same, but I put this one on because I prefer Bon Scott's vocals. The title track feels like it goes forever, but in a way where you wish it didn't end. Some nice fashioned high voltage rock'n'roll. Listen if you like Black Sabbath.

There are way more that I could have put on here (Gurrumul, Frenzal Rhomb, Powderfinger, Silverchair, The Presets, The Chats, Men At Work, Tame Impala etc.) but I think you could probably discover them in your own time. In the meantime, here is the very culmination of Australian music. Nearly 50 years has led up to this being made.

Fuckin skitz cunt.

[jessythebunny]

🚂Henry the green engine🌳

💚Henry is the biggest engine in Tidmouth sheds, and is considered the second oldest engine on Sodor.

💚Before the Flying Kipper accident, Henry was in good health, but he was and is still upset because he was stuck in the tunnel, which caused him to be locked there and forgotten about him as punishment, which led to the deterioration of his paint and became severely impaired in his eyesight due to him sitting in the dark, so he wears glasses. Specially for that.

💚After the Flying Kipper accident, the result was that Henry was filled with many scratches and scars in his arms, middle, and legs, which led to him becoming paralyzed, but if it were not for Lady and her magic, he would have remained paralyzed for the rest of his life.

💚Henry suffers from a phobia called "Mysophobia"(It is the fear of exposure to disease or harm) Therefore, Henry must take his own special coal and not take any other coal to avoid the sickness.

💚Henry always carries a bag on his shoulder that contains anything related to agriculture, because this is his favorite activity and if he sees any sick plant or tree, Henry has everything he needs to help them.

💚Henry has a very gentle and affectionate voice, but if he gets angry and upset, his tone changes to become savage

💚Henry is afraid of rain and hates this weather very much. Thomas tried a lot with him, but to no avail, because this is why he got stuck in the tunnel.

💚Henry collects plants, names them, and takes good care of them. His favorite plants are cedar and aloe vera

💚Henry won fifth place in the great railway show pulling the heaviest carts, Nah he's weak

💚Henry likes anything related to sugar, especially the waffles and chocolate crepes.

💚Henry wears a hat on his head to keep his hair styled, and since he is soft and shy, he wears puffy clothes.

💚He spends most of his time relaxing in Henry's forest, which is his own and that's why it's in his name, reading books, or spending time with Edward or with his husband Hiro.

💚To this day, Henry still feels remorse and sadness because he kicked Duck from Tidmouth and believed Diesel and his lies about Duck, and he is scared of Diesel 10.

💚He's close with Thomas, Percy, Gordon, James, Edward, Emily, Hiro, Rosie, Nia, Toby, Marina(oc)

💚good friends with Duck, Boco, Rebecca, Donald and Douglas, Oliver and Toad, The flying scottsman, Mavis, Paxton, Sedney the diesel.