#DUDE hes only like 35-40 dollars

[prommytheus]

omg

bbg.. i need him in my life

[dearly]

Pete Wentz (6:39:20 PM): Hey Ryan Ross (6:39:39 PM): hey Pete Wentz (6:40:09 PM): Is this the guy fro poanic at the disco Ryan Ross (6:40:23 PM): yeah im ryan, is this pete? Pete Wentz (6:41:12 PM): Yeah Ryan Ross (6:41:18 PM): hey man Pete Wentz (6:42:37 PM): How arer you Ryan Ross (6:43:17 PM): im not bad, working on a paper for english. hows everything with the new record? Pete Wentz (6:44:37 PM): Going really well Pete Wentz (6:45:04 PM): How's everything wiht your band are those just remixes Ryan Ross (6:46:01 PM): awesome, yeah we only did those on my laptop because we cant get into a studio yet. but we still have alot of those parts live and full band Pete Wentz (6:46:25 PM): Does it have samples like that Pete Wentz (6:46:42 PM): How many people are in the band.... Are you guys all in hicghschool Ryan Ross (6:47:20 PM): do you mean do we use a sampler? our drummer uses a drum sampler which we put some of the stuff on, and he plays some of it Ryan Ross (6:47:43 PM): im in college. im 18 the other three of them are 17 and in high school Pete Wentz (6:48:26 PM): Like of the pure volume site songs what would not be part of your live show Ryan Ross (6:50:18 PM): well right now the synth stuff because we need a keyboard player. we are trying out a few guys soon though. and some of the drum parts are different. Pete Wentz (6:50:48 PM): I absolutely love the stuff Ryan Ross (6:52:16 PM): but we have two guitar players one sings and i play lead. its kind of hard to describe it. we are a rock band but about half of a song will be dance-ish or sort of 80s sounding Ryan Ross (6:52:28 PM): really? wow thanks alot man Ryan Ross (6:53:12 PM): it really is a huge compliment coming from you Ryan Ross (6:53:35 PM): i was actually really suprised you listened to it Ryan Ross (6:53:40 PM): i didnt expect you to see it Pete Wentz (6:54:00 PM): Is there some pics of you guys anywhere Ryan Ross (6:55:10 PM): no, we are taking them pretty soon for the website, its just not done yet. i have some just of me on livejournal. but thats wierd haha Pete Wentz (6:56:09 PM): Yeah fuck get some to me Pete Wentz (6:56:19 PM): I think I may come see you in californaia Ryan Ross (6:56:44 PM): really? Ryan Ross (6:57:08 PM): that would be awesome Pete Wentz (6:57:46 PM): I've been listeneing to those songs nonstop. Is the band a side thing or is it gonna be fulltime? Ryan Ross (6:58:20 PM): no its full time Ryan Ross (6:59:24 PM): well aside from school. which sucks Ryan Ross (6:59:32 PM): but we want to do this Pete Wentz (7:00:00 PM): When are those kids out of school Ryan Ross (7:00:26 PM): the drummer and bass player are graduating early. so like january and other guitarist/singer graduates in the spring Pete Wentz (7:01:16 PM): Nice Pete Wentz (7:01:23 PM): Do you know about my label Ryan Ross (7:01:46 PM): yeah i think i saw something a while ago on a journal entry, is gym class heroes the only band on it right now? Pete Wentz (7:03:10 PM): Yeah. I signed the academy. But they are fbr strictly gym class and I am looking for another Pete Wentz (7:03:33 PM): The cool thing about it is I just met with waner and they want both of the bands and to give me an imprint Ryan Ross (7:03:55 PM): oh cool i like the academy alot, oh i see yea i was going to ask you about that Pete Wentz (7:04:03 PM): Which pretty much means a lot more money to promote cool artists Pete Wentz (7:04:14 PM): You guys plays out a lot? Ryan Ross (7:04:39 PM): thats awesome man. actually no we just kind of started this thing up a few months ago, the show in victorville is going to be our first one Pete Wentz (7:05:51 PM): Really Pete Wentz (7:05:56 PM): Interesting Pete Wentz (7:06:11 PM): How much do you guys practice Ryan Ross (7:06:45 PM): we've been trying to figure out the best way to do this stuff live, and we've been having a hard time on figuring out how to make it sound good. depending on the place we might not be able to use all the electronic stuff that we want to do which sucks but alot of venues, at least here might have a hard time setting us up. we practice at

least 4 times a week so like. between 24-30 hours a week Pete Wentz (7:07:09 PM): Nice Pete Wentz (7:07:21 PM): I am gonna come to the show Ryan Ross (7:08:13 PM): we wish we could more often. but school is getting in the way. and it sucks cause parents think its a waste of time playing music and want me to focus on school. im sure you know how that is. Ryan Ross (7:08:23 PM): thanks alot man really Pete Wentz (7:08:55 PM): I do Pete Wentz (7:09:05 PM): What are peoples reactions to it Ryan Ross (7:10:04 PM): some good some bad. everyone is so into post hardcore stuff these days that some kids just brush it off. which is fine but then some kids like it cause its a little different i guess Pete Wentz (7:11:30 PM): Can that kid sing live? Ryan Ross (7:12:54 PM): yeah, he's been taking voice lessons for a little bit so thats starting to help him Pete Wentz (7:13:19 PM): Is he on? I mean on here he sounds awesome Ryan Ross (7:14:21 PM): yeah he's on pitch, we recorded that stuff with like a 100 dollar vocal mic. the only effects we used was pretty much reverb on the main parts. Pete Wentz (7:14:42 PM): Yeah sounds good kind of like patrick Pete Wentz (7:14:47 PM): I like it Ryan Ross (7:16:57 PM): yeah thats the only thing we get that alot. and thats just how the kid sings. we like your band but we dont want to sound like you guys, or be compared to fob all the time you know? but yeah he is aware that kids say he sounds like patrick so he's just trying different vocal stuff sometimes. Pete Wentz (7:19:06 PM): Here's the thing if I show you guys interest a lot of crappy labels are gonna come and do the same and I don't want a huge mess out there. I mean how interested are you guys in going fulltime when you can Pete Wentz (7:19:19 PM): Yeah you'll get eh patrock thing but how many people. Sound like hime Ryan Ross (7:19:47 PM): so you really think we've got potential then? Pete Wentz (7:19:54 PM): I do Ryan Ross (7:20:05 PM): i've wanted to play in a band for my job ever since i started high school at least. Ryan Ross (7:20:07 PM): we all want to do this Ryan Ross (7:21:05 PM): its like i cant put enough dedication into anything exept playing guitar and writing Pete Wentz (7:23:01 PM): I'm with you Ryan Ross (7:24:05 PM): but yeah. i cant see myself doing anything else but playing in a band, cause every job i've ever had ive hated it Pete Wentz (7:24:57 PM): You don't have a picture of the band Ryan Ross (7:25:44 PM): no, but if you need it i could have my buddy take some tomorrow at practice Pete Wentz (7:26:58 PM): That would be rad Ryan Ross (7:27:37 PM): okay we'll take some Ryan Ross (7:28:08 PM): are you online much? Pete Wentz (7:33:12 PM): Sometimes Ryan Ross (7:33:35 PM): okay, i was just wondering if this was your email incase you arent on i'll just send them Pete Wentz (7:34:17 PM): Yeah send it here for sure Ryan Ross (7:34:36 PM): okay Ryan Ross (7:34:55 PM): dude this better not be a joke, it better be you Pete Wentz (7:35:12 PM): It is Pete Wentz (7:35:34 PM): But there are a lot of fakers out there Ryan Ross (7:35:55 PM): okay. yeah i know someone has shown me like fake journals of you and stuff. thats creepy Ryan Ross (7:36:10 PM): thats why i asked if it was you for sure Pete Wentz (7:36:32 PM): This guy who is iming me is your manager Ryan Ross (7:37:03 PM): is it xxxtoughffxxx ? Pete Wentz (7:37:22 PM): Yeah Ryan Ross (7:37:38 PM): i dont know if he's our manager. he's our friend, he's been helping us out with a website, merch and the show in victorville Ryan Ross (7:38:35 PM): he's starting a company up and he wants to help us out Pete Wentz (7:43:04 PM): Ah I got t Pete Wentz (7:43:32 PM): It Pete Wentz (7:43:37 PM): You guys are awesome and if its what I think it is I want ti to be thenext academy Ryan Ross (7:44:58 PM): wow thanks alot. i hope you like the stuff live, its not completely different but it is different. i mean the singing is the same and all that. Pete Wentz (7:47:46 PM): cool Pete Wentz (7:48:06 PM): You guys look good. The chicks gonna be swooning? Ryan Ross (7:48:38 PM): once we get

a keyboard player who can do all of the sampling we want to do it will be alot better too. its like we know how we want to sound, but just finding the right way to do it i guess is what we are working on. Ryan Ross (7:48:40 PM): hahaha Ryan Ross (7:48:51 PM): i dont know man, we look alright i guess Ryan Ross (7:48:57 PM): we look young Pete Wentz (7:49:42 PM): Youngs not abd at all Pete Wentz (7:49:47 PM): How does the singiner look Ryan Ross (7:50:05 PM): dead sexy. Ryan Ross (7:50:41 PM): he's no pete wentz. but still Pete Wentz (7:51:42 PM): Hahaha Pete Wentz (7:51:54 PM): Goddamn as long as he looks cool.singing Pete Wentz (7:52:14 PM): For sure send me pics and all how many songs you guys have? Ryan Ross (7:52:39 PM): haha Ryan Ross (7:53:00 PM): kk Ryan Ross (7:53:54 PM): we've only got 4 right now, its been tough to write since school started and everyone's busier. and those are the first 4 songs we've written as a band. at the show we'll play those and a cover of new order maybe. or depeche mode. we dont know yet Pete Wentz (7:56:08 PM): Nice Pete Wentz (7:56:21 PM): I gotta run Pete Wentz (7:56:32 PM): But ill hit you on here later Pete Wentz (7:56:38 PM): Send me those pics and write the hits Ryan Ross (7:56:43 PM): okay dude. good talking to you Pete Wentz (7:56:43 PM): Peaaaaaace Ryan Ross (7:56:44 PM): hahaha Ryan Ross (7:56:47 PM): later man Pete Wentz is away from the computer as of 7:56:51 PM. Auto response from Pete Wentz: Igot99problems Pete Wentz is back at the computer as of 10:05:48 PM. Pete Wentz is away from the computer as of 10:06:23 PM.

[toomanyfandoms02]

Requests!

I'm very much open to requests right now! I'm writing for Peter Parker / Tom Holland at the moment. And since I just got a little influx of followers here's my old dialogue prompt list so you can request! You can do so in the comments or my ask box. You can request as many as you want at once :)

1. "I told you not to read that."

2. "Sir, this is for children only."

3. "Are you kidding me? We're not 'fine'!"

4. "Whatever you're going to ask, the answer is no!"

5. "Hey... what's wrong with your face?"

6. "You look a lot different from your profile picture."

7. "Are you going to keep walking by my house, or are you going to come in?"

8. "Dude, it's three in the morning."

9. "I can't believe I use to think he was attractive."

10. "Actually, you *are* speaking to the manager."

11. "This isn't going to be a typical best man's speech."

12. "According to this, you owe them eighty thousand dollars."

13. "That's the worst reason I've ever heard to have a baby."

14. "I didn't even recognize you!"

15. "You're Satan." Costume party

16. "I need a place to stay."

17. "It's six o'clock in the morning, you're not having vodka."

18. "Safety first. What are you? FIVE?"

19. "This is girl talk, so leave."

20. "You're bleeding all over my carpet."

21. "Just smile, I really need to see you smile right now."

22. "Hold still."

23. "You're not interested, are you?"

24. "Oh honey, I'd never be jealous of you."

25. "I'm telling you, I'm haunted."

26. "Touch her again and I'll break your wrist."

27. "Don't look behind you, but that guy is checking you out."

28. "I need you to pretend to be my boyfriend."

29. "Quick! Kiss me!"

30. "Just shut up and kiss me."

31. Ihate high school reunions."

32. "I think I picked up your coffee by mistake."

33. "I've never felt this way before... and it scares the shit out of me."

34. "Wait a second, are you jealous?"

35. "This is by far the stupidest plan you've ever had. Of course I'm in."

36. "You never told me you had a fucking twin."

37. "Am I suppose to be scared of you?" Skeleton dick costume

38. "You're hiding something from me." Ethan proposes

39. "A wedding?"

40. "Where would someone hide in a town like this?"

41. "H-how long have you been standing there?"

42. "Is this skirt suppose to be this short?"

43. "Oh fuck off."

44. "When did you take that?"

45. "I hid it."

46. "Stop trying to look cool in paparazzi pictures, you look like a dumbass."

47. "Can you stop laughing?"

48. "You look like a reptile from this angle."

49. "You have a dirty mind."

50. "You guys are lame."

51. "I don't know. Resurrection maybe?"

52. "This is a safe space." "What the hell are you talking about?" "SAFE SPACE!"

53. "Just stab him."

54. "I'm in dire need of assistance."

55. "I'm gonna die in an elevator full of idiots."

56. "Shoot me."

57. "I feel like you know."

58. "You're making me dizzy."

59. "I don't want any excuses, they must have the hottest date ever."

60. "Are you with him because it's easy?"

61. "Dibs!"

62. "If we die, I'm going to kill you."

63. "Do you think you could just go *one* day without pissing me off?"

64. "Your hands are really soft."

65. "We've become the clingy newlyweds you've always complained about."

66. "Pregnant?"

67. "We are SO much cuter than them."

68. "Wanna go for a drive?"

69. "Is there a reason you're blushing like that?"

70. "Sleep over? Please?"

71. "Are we on a date right now?"

72. "Am I your lockscreen?" "You weren't suppose to see that."

73. "Well I think you're beautiful."

74. "Your feet are so cold!"

75. "You come here often?" "Well I work here, so I'll have to say yes."

76. "You met me yesterday though?" "Yes, and I would die for you in one second. Next question."

77. "I can't stop smiling."

78. "Did you see it?"

79. "Don't leave me alone."

80. "Have you ever kissed anyone before?"

81. "You didn't tell me your friend was cute! Now what am I gonna do?"

82. "How can you drink that stuff?"

83. "Stop apologizing for other people! You aren't the shitty one!"

84. "I just wanna be swept off my feet. Is that so much to ask?"

85. "Oh, my ankle! It must be broken!" *wink wink*

86. "These heels are peeling off my **skin**. But yes, keep complaing about your tie you whine ass."

87. "I don't want to ruin your party."

88. "Could you just come get me?"

89. "Now I have to start counting all over again!"

90. "Do you talk to your mother with that mouth?"

91. "You are very endearing while you are half-asleep."

92. "But I want to hear you sing!"

93. "No- Mom- don't tell him I said that. Wait!"

94. "And you wonder why you are still single."

95. "Somebodys cranky." "Somebody needs to shut up."

96. "She's hot. But she's evil."

97. "Pinky promise!"

98. "I'd rather jump out that window. But thanks."

99. "Hello, sunshine."

100. "I have no idea what you're talking about."

BONUS:

Prompts based on things my best friend has said (changed a little bit for context)

1. Man, I hope this ice melts soon

2. Holy SHIT the Disney World parking lot is packed.

3. Those tree lights are burning my retinas

4. "These are fun to work with." "Not to eat." "No!"

5. "I mean, I could hit a kid with a car."

6. "You up? I need to call you! It's not bad it's just kinda funny!"

7. "Wow I can't imagine being that rich! How old are the kids, maybe I can date one!"

[dere-boys]

Pre-Written Dialogue Prompts

Here at dere-boys we love getting unique and interesting dialogue prompts to write for you. We know, however, sometimes you want something written but you just don’t have any ideas! Fear not! We’ve compiled a list of dialogue prompts that you can request to help you!

Really looking for Yandere Yoongi content?

Don’t worry, just inbox us with the number corresponding to the dialogue you want used, the idol, whether your Y/N is male or female, and if you’d like your piece to be NSFW or SFW.

It should look something like this => #31, yoongi, sfw, F

Once a line of dialogue has been used it’ll be crossed out.

For the list of dere-types and the idols we write for please check out this => Dere-Boy Line-Up

And if you’d like to look at the rules or the account overview and get to know the admins a bit please check us out on our welcome post => Account Overview & Admin Introductions

1. “I have a lot going for me, but humility is not one of them.”

2. “Is that seriously your password?

3. “I’m surprised you haven’t been arrested yet. Wait, no, I’m not.”

4. “So, you broke my favorite mug… and you’re breaking up with me?"

5. “Oh, good, you’re here! Hold this."

6. “Dude. We talked about this. Boundaries!"

7. “Now, don’t be mad, but…"

8. “Well, thanks to you, that’s another Taco Bell that’s banned us for life."

9. “So you know, I haven’t had my coffee yet. And your voice is putting me to sleep."

10. “Please tell me you didn’t eat that."

11. “What on earth happened in here?”

12. “I’ll take that as a compliment.”

13. “No. Hell, no. Absolutely not.”

14. “Do you maybe think, in retrospect, that this was a terrible idea?”

15. “So hang on, let me get this straight.”

16. “I need nothing but my mad skills, rugged good looks, and maybe half a million dollars.”

17. “I made breakfast, but I didn’t know what you liked so I made enough to probably feed a small tribe.”

18. "So you've been living in denial all these years?"

19. “So that could have gone better…”

20. “Look, I’m not saying I’ll help if you buy me a donut, but I’m not, not saying I won’t help.”

21. “You don’t know what this means to me. You’re my first human subject, and we… are going to make history!”

22. “The worst part is you didn’t even notice.”

23. “I was doing so well until you showed up. Things were good…”

24. “At first, I thought it was part of the act.”

25. “Honey, please tell me. Did he hit you?”

26. “I don’t like that look. Wipe it off your face before I decide to.”

27. “How could you do this to me?”

28. “I know you don’t have any reason to trust me, but… you need to know something.”

29. “You’re allowed to need help sometimes. And I know I haven’t been what you needed. But I’m here, and I wanna help.”

30. “You’re the worst. And you’re all I’ve got.”

31. “If I wanted to get better, I wouldn’t be dating you.”

32. “You think I don’t know you’re only here because he sent you?”

33. “No, I don’t hate you. We’re not there, yet.”

34. “It’s not that I don’t like my life. It’s that I don’t have the energy to enjoy it.”

35. “If you’re here to tell me what happened last night, someone beat you to it.”

36. “Do you know what today is?”

37. “You are remarkably well-behaved tonight. What have you been up to?”

38. “How – how did you find me?”

39. “There’s blood everywhere.”

40. “I don’t even hate you. That would imply I cared.”

41. “There’s no point running.”

42. “Stop yelling!”

43. “Believe me, my dear, no one regrets this more than I do.”

44. “I’m going to give you five seconds to take that back.”

45. “Apologise. Right now.”

46. “Good. I meant it to hurt.”

47. "Do you think keeping your eyes shut will keep you safe?"

48. "If you can't wake up from the nightmare, maybe you're not asleep."

49. “Smartass. I’d suggest biting your tongue before I rip it out.”

50. “Your mine. This- is mine, so don’t you dare think of someone else.”

51. “Is this how you flirt with everyone?”

52. “Waiiiiit, did you… do something different with your hair?”

53. “I’m not good with sarcasm. If you don’t like me, just say it.”

54. “Don’t take this the wrong way, but you don’t exactly blend in.”

55. “Now, before I say anything, promise me you’ll stay calm.”

56. “I don’t need a gentleman right now.”

57. “You’ve caught me at a really bad time.”

58. “What have you done now?”

59. “Well, this is new.”

60. “How are you feeling today? A little better, hmm?”

61. “Oh man, I’ve had the worst day ever.”

62. “This isn’t what it looks like, I swear! Okay … it’s kind of what it looks like, but just give me a chance to explain."

63. “That’s the first time I’ve heard anyone call it that.”

64. “Oh my gosh, are you sure? Like, sure sure?”

65. “I’ve never actually liked chocolate.”

66. “That’s a very … bold … thing to say.”

67. “And you can’t think of any other reason?”

68 .“Hey. Look at me.”

69. “I’m sorry. That sounds awful.”

70. “That’s not very nice.”

71. “Just sit around and cry, then. I don’t have that luxury.”

72. "How much of that did you hear?”

73. For what it’s worth, I don’t know much about you either.”

74. “Why do you have to look at me like that? It’s making me weak, please stop."

75. “I’m so lucky.”

76. “I’m asking because I’ve seen the way you look at me.”

77. “Stop doing that with your face, someone else is going to snatch you up.”

78. “I shouldn’t be allowed to be this happy.”

79. “Don’t pretend that you don’t feel the same way.”

80. “Don’t act innocent, you had me pinned underneath you 5 minutes ago.”

- Hope to see you here! - ❄️ & 🌻

Inbox Request Navigation and Welcome

[bobasheebaby]

200 Brooklyn 99 Prompts

Rosa

1 “Talk to him, that's what friends do.” “Nope. I'm gonna wait 'til I'm on my deathbed, get in the last word and then die immediately.” “That's your plan for dealing with this?” “That's my plan for dealing with everything. I have seventy-seven arguments I'm going to win that way.”

2 “I'm already seeing somebody, NAME.” “Oh, and just like that, things got interesting.” “And just like that, I left.”

3 “NAME is even wearing his/her formal leather jacket.” “It's the one without any blood on it.”

4 “Right, that's the guy/girl you said the lame stuff about. Like he’s/she's a good listener.” “Sorry, what do you look for in a guy/girl?” “Real stuff, like the shape of his/her ass.”

5 “Sorry I'm late. I had to go back to the deli and return my Everything Bagel. In what world does everything not include beef jerky?” “All of them.”

6 “He/She also likes to look up recipes online and go, "Who's got the time?"

7 “Thank you, NAME. Your entire life is garbage.”

8 “NAME , tell us about your family.” “I have one.”

9 “Anyone over the age of six celebrating a birthday should go to hell.”

10 “I am dating his/her nephew/niece. Now we are hanging out on weekends. What is next? Oh! Small talk.”

11 “Wait, is that a smile I see?” “Possibly. My immune system is too weak to fight off my smile muscles.”

12 “Whoa, what happened? You know what, forget it. I'll just read NAME’s notes.”

13 “NAME? Are you stuck in there?” “No, I'm in here by choice.” “Oh, 'cause I hear some banging noises as if someone was struggling to open the door.” “No. That was the pipes.” “Or, is it the sound of you learning how to ask for help? You know, you can't spell ‘independent’ without ‘dependent.’” “And you can't spell ‘Go [bleep] yourself’ without ‘[bleep] you.’”

14 “I've said "excuse me" more times this morning than I have in my entire life. Twice!”

15 “Oh, nothing better after a long shift than coming to BAR NAME. It's like Cheers, where everybody knows your name.” “A place where everybody knows your name is hell. You're describing hell.”

16 “So, what is this? Casual, serious? I need to know how to make fun of you.”

17 “NAME and I broke up. He/She ate soup too much.” “What, like every day?” “It happened twice.”

18 “So, what are you drinking?” “I'll have a margarita. But, like, a skinny margarita. So, like, tequila, lime, and a tiny splash of agave.” “Mm. I refuse to order that.”

19 “What are you looking all wistful about?” “Just thinking, about relationships and love, and how I'm way better at them than I thought I'd be. Should I do a TED Talk on it?” “Doesn't seem any dumber than all the other TED Talks.”

20 “Why didn't you tell me? I had no idea things were getting that serious.” “Yeah, it's very embarrassing having feelings.”

21 “So are you bringing someone to the wedding?” “No, I'm taking a break from dating for a while.” “What?” “I'm sick of asking people how many siblings they have. Oh, is it somewhere between zero and two? How fascinating.”

22 “I grew a goatee and it looks amazing, and I know you can see it.” “Of course we can see it, NAME. It's horrible.”

23 “It feels like you're being a little harsh.” “Thanks, good note. I was going for extremely harsh. I'll turn it up.”

24 “Are your senses heightened?” “I think I might be pregnant, not bitten by a radioactive spider.”

25 “You're what sneezes are!”

26 “Seriously, you guys should stand up once in a while. You know, for your hearts.”

27 “NAME, this is dumb. I'm just gonna go.” “No, no, no. You promised me more time. I still have seven minutes.” “I really don't want to miss my flight, and I cannot physically stand the way that room smells anymore.” “Just breathe through your mouth.”

28 “You know, some people say, ‘Mo money, mo problems,’ but those people are idiots. Money's amazing.”

29 “Dude, just admit you ruined everything and turned our lives into a living hell. No biggie.”

30 “We don't want anyone getting alcohol poisoning, so if you throw up, you're disqualified.” “I never throw up. I just tell my stomach to deal with it. My body is terrified of me.”

Jake

31 “I also have a hairline fracture in my thumb. Mankind's least important finger, am I right?”

32 “I wasn't hurt that badly. The doctor said all my bleeding was internal. That's where the blood's supposed to be.”

33 “How much could I possibly owe you? Fifty, sixty bucks?” “Two thousand, four hundred and thirty seven dollars.” “Dollars?! Wait, of course dollars. Why was that the part I was surprised by?”

34 “So, I'm going to grab a healthy breakfast.” “Are those gummy bears wrapped in a fruit roll-up?” “Breakfast burrito, but yeah.” “I pity your dentist.” “Joke's on you. I don't have a dentist.”

35 “I'm talking to my credit card company. I tried to get an online subscription to the New Yorker and they declined me. Apparently, based on my previous purchases, they assumed it was fraud. That's crazy. I'm fancy. One time I had coffee-flavored ice cream.”

36 “Rules are made to be broken.” “They were made to be followed. Nothing is made to be broken.” “Uh, piñatas.” “Glow sticks.” “Karate boards.” “Spaghetti when you have a small pot.” “Rules.”

37 “Hey, can I ask you something?” “Mm-hmm.” “If the toilets drain into the ocean, does that mean a tiny shark could swim up and bite me in the butt?” “No, not at all.” “Psh, lame.”

38 “NAME, super important question. Which one of these shirts should I wear to dinner with your dad/mom tonight?” “Those are exactly the same.” “I have a signature look, NAME.”

39 “Hello, good sir, I'd like your finest bottle of wine, please.” “That will be $1,600.” “Great, I'd like your $8-est bottle of wine, please.”

40 “I am straight-up depressed. NAME’s been doing her best to cheer me up. He/She gave me this sticker this morning just for waking up.” “Ew, it's like you're dating your teacher.” “I know, it's so hot.”

41 “Wait. Before you say anything, I want to guess what happened based on your face. Someone died. No! You won a prize. I'm not getting better at this.”

42 “What is the bandwidth on the wifi here? We have much content to stream.”

43 “Oh, you sweaty, chair-spinning morons. You're gonna get us out of here.”

44 “Sir, I think I speak for all of us when —“ “He/She doesn't.” “He/She doesn't.”

45 “So, your brother/sister's a bit of a nightmare.” “I wouldn't say that. I mean, at most, he’s/she's a daymare.” “Those are so much scarier.” “Yeah.”

46 “Look, NAME, I burnt two hundred calories.” “That's your heart rate.” “Yeah, that checks out.”

47 “I don't slump, people. I opposite of slump. I pmuls. That's slump backwards and it's what I do. I pmuls all over this bitch.”

48 “Excuse me. We were just looking for a place to —“ “Boink.” “Yes, boink. That's my preferred term for it, too.”

49 “Thank you for doing this. I love you.” “Noice. Smort. I love you too.”

50 “Adult parties? I believe they're called orgies.”

51 “I have a sexy voice!

Champagne.

Mountain range.

Hugs.”

52 “Has anyone ever told you you look just like a statue?” “Yes.”

53 “NAME, you're smiling. It's very weird. Like seeing a turtle out of its shell.”

54 “You look happy. Let me guess. Your egg sandwich fell on the floor, and they gave it to you for free.” “No. Can you do that? Why doesn't everyone just drop their sandwiches on the floor?” “I was trying to insult you.” “And instead you gave me an amazing life hack!”

55 “So, we gonna talk about what happened back there? I haven't seen someone cry that much since NAME heard they were remaking ‘First Wives Club.’”

56 “Hey, there, NAME. Everything okay?” “No, I'm having a meltdown.” “Props. That was amazing.” “Thanks. It was a lot of work.”

57 “Almost makes me wanna take things seriously all the time. But then I'm like ‘boobs, farts, boobs, whatever’.”

58 “Ahh, babe, this is so nice. There are hot stones on our butts for no reason.” “Not on mine. My butt stones keep falling off, because I'm so tense about NAME being here and ruining everything.”

59 “Okay, don't shoot! That's how people get shot.”

60 “Rule number 3: Let's not have sex right away.” “Cool. Cool cool cool cool cool. No doubt, no doubt, no doubt. Good rule. No sex. Good rule.”

Charles

61 “Okay, but I thought since you were in charge, maybe I could be your right hand man? Your Tinker Bell?” “Tinker Bell?” “Let me tell you something about Tinker Bell. Tinker Bell is a loyal lieutenant and a real thorn in the side of Captain Hook.”

62 “NAME, why don't you show Danger what a fax machine is.” “Okay. Imagine a letter had unprotected sex with a phone.”

63 “Hey, NAME, are you ready to go streaking?” “What?” “That's what my dad/mom and I called getting blonde streaks in your hair. We used to do it to our ponytails on road trips. You just take a little lemon up top, and let the sun do the rest. We called it giving each other road head.” “You just said you called it going streaking.” “It had a couple names.”

64 “So we have good news, and we have bad news.” “My Nana always said, ‘Bad news first because the good news is probably a lie.’ Fun fact: she made me cry a lot.”

65 “What about me? What if something happens to NAME, and he never gets to meet my baby? I don't want to hang out with some stupid baby who's never met NAME.”

66 “Oh, you're right. I'm gonna tell him/her. It might not be today. It might not be tomorrow. It definitely won't be later than tomorrow. So pretty much today or tomorrow then.”

67 “No! I was eavesdropping. I'm always eavesdropping.” “I don't like it.” “Look, I didn't spend the last seven years watching your love ripen, only to have it sullied by a city hall wedding. You're getting married right here, right now.”

68 “I know you think my judgement's clouded because I like him/her a little bit.” “You doodled your wedding invitation.” “No, that's our joint tombstone.” “My mistake.”

69 “How many times have I smacked you in your face?” “Lost count.” “And you still have no fear of me.” “I'm trying to read your womb vibe.” “Exactly. Knock it off.”

70 “Okay, first of all, NAME, you look amazing. Secondly, I made an appointment at the salon with Nikki, for you, under the name Gabriella Fuentes de San Miguel Estrada. I had fun with the name.” “Clearly.”

71 “He’s/She's got a type, which is really any one but you.” “Yeah, that was my ex-husband/ex-wife's type, too.”

72 “Sexy train is leaving the station. Check out this caboose. Later, sluts.”

73 “I can't wait to see you, my luscious little breakfast quiche. I just want to draw you a bubble bath and spoon-feed you caviar. I think we should open up a joint checking account. I love you. [pause] What am I doing?” “It's okay. I hung up right after ‘Chucklebunny’.” “Help me. I've gone Full NAME.”

74 “Do you desire a crispen potato?” “Oh, don't mind if I do-ble. Wait a minute. Crispen potato. Why are you fancy talking.” “How dare you, sir/madam. I speak the common tongue.” “There it is again. You only do that when you're lying or hiding something.” “Hiding? Ha. Pish-posh.”

75 “Hey, donut holes. Don't mind if I do. Eurgh! Fish? Fish donuts, NAME? What is wrong with you?” “It's takoyaki. I'm drowning my sorrows in octopus balls.”

76 “Put on a T-shirt for all I care. It doesn't matter what you wear.” “Of course it matters. He has to wear the smaller checks. Big checks wash him out. Where are you, NAME?”

77 “Ooh, if they have your phone, we can track where they're going. I have ‘Find My Phone’ set up to track you. What? I do that for all my friends, not just you.” “Show me.” “There's no time!”

78 “You okay?” “Yeah, no burns. The doctor said I was lucky my body was so damp.”

79 “You guys have been down here for two hours. What, did you have sex forty times?”

80 “What? You don't need closet space. You have, like, one outfit.”

81 “You just graduated pie school, bitches. [pause] Sorry I said bitches, I'm just really worked up.”

82 “So, I know you're NAME’s best friend, and —“ “Did he/she say that? Did you get that on tape?” “No.” “No, he/she didn't say that or no, you didn't get it on tape? Doesn't matter. Either way, you screwed up big time.”

83 “What you did is the culinary equivalent of unprotected sex.”

84 “That's right. Boom. Just kicked Santa in the testicles.”

85 “No, there's no one in my life. [wink] Sort of a sad thing to wink about, I realize now.”

86 “NAME! Were you dreaming about NAME again?” “Why did you wake me up?! I told you never to wake me up!”

87 “You used all the touching time, NAME. I get 100% of the goodbye touching time. 100%.”

88 “Do you wanna know why he/she went out with him/her and not you?” “Yeah.” “Because he/she actually asked him/her out.”

89 “NAME, will you taste this batter?” “Mm-hmm. Hmm. I think it's a little off.” “You know what's off? Your mouth! Why NAME lets your stupid tongue anywhere near him/her I'll never know. Nope, I forgot the sugar. That's on me.”

90 “There's no need for NAME to see me unleash the beast.”

Captain Holt

91 “Look at you. Always working. What happened to my fun big/little brother/sister?” “Fun? I was never fun. You take that back.”

92 “It's the most fun day of the year. Something you wouldn't understand because you're not programmed to feel joy.” “Yes, but my software is due for an exuberance upgrade.”

93 “Sticks and stones, NAME.” “Describing your breakfast?”

94 “NAME, how are you feeling?” “Better today. I even managed to eat some plain toast this morning.” “Smart. Something bland.” “That's my favorite breakfast.”

95 “Joining us for lunch, Sir?” “Oh, no, I've already consumed the required calories for this day period.” “Yummy.”

96 “You all right, NAME? Tough weekend?” “I went to Barbados with my husband/wife. We wove hats out of palm fronds and swam with the stingrays. I've never been happier.”

97 “Maybe I should wing it. Love, it sustains you. It's like oatmeal.” “Okay. Okay. Not bad for winging it.” “I lied. Took me two hours to write that.”

98 “I do not have a problem. If I want to play Kwazy Cupcakes, I will play Kwazy Cupcakes. Kwazy is a difficult word to say in anger, but I think I've made my feelings clear.”

99 “This place is so romantic.” “Yeah, and so intimate.” “Don't worry. I'm not listening to you. I'm just thinking about how this sea bass is cold but not as cold and cruel as the hands of fate that have thrust my entire life into darkness.” “Ah, damn it. I just ordered the sea bass.”

100 “Yeah, and your new shirt is very aggressive and confusing. Is the pineapple the slut, or is it calling someone else a slut?” “Clearly the pineapple is the slut.” “Huh.”

101 “Oh, I've caused a problem. I think I am getting a text message. Bloop. Ah, there it is.”

102 “So nice of you to greet us, NAME. I thought surely you'd still be crushed under that house in Munchkinland.”

103 “So, do you NAME --“ “Yes.” “And do you --“ “Yes. Yes. We do. We're married.”

104 “I mean, don't people call you NAME?” “How dare you.”

105 “So you lied to me? Out of pity. You pity me.” “I wouldn't put it that way.” “I would. I am offended. I am angry. I am very tired. So I'm gonna take a nap, but when I wake up, oh, you are in for it.”

106 “Look at that. You've helped me find my smile.”

107 “Huh. Meat from the street. Sounds like a fun treat. Hah. I'm a poet and ... I didn't even know I was rhyming those words. But it happened anyway.”

108 “Oh, look at that. An alert. I'm probably trending already. What? My account has been deactivated?” “Twitter thinks you're a bot.” “Why? I am a human. I am a human male/female.”

109 “Care to sit? I'm sure you'd like to take some weight off your cloven hooves.” “Call me the devil, NAME? How original.” “Actually, I was calling you a goat. You goat.”

110 “NAME! I'm coming with you.” “Thank you, NAME.” “I'm also coming.” “Not necessary.”

111 “Spot checks are done. Needless to say I'm thoroughly underwhelmed.” “Huh. From your expression, I would have guessed constipated. Or chilly.”

112 “NAME, you have a pretty low bar for what you consider drama. Once, I used an exclamation point in a email. You called me Diana Ross.” “I assure you, in this case, I do not exaggerate.”

113 “I know they say it's not good to have a TV in the bedroom. Which is why I don't.”

114 “NAME, did you just laugh?” “Uproariously.”

115 “You know when you play along with the robot jokes, it kinda ruins my enjoyment of them?” “Yes, I know.”

116 “And what do you hope to get out of this, NAME? Let me guess revenge on Dorothy for killing your sister?”

117 “It was a good game though for a dumbass.” Okay, you're kinda overusing that one. Maybe switch it up a little bit.” “Oh, good note. You dick.” “That landed good.”

118 “Dancing over. Situation defused.” “No!”

119 “All right, NAME, I'm sick of you wasting time. So, yes, I spilled some minestrone on my pants and I'm sitting in my underwear. Happy?”

120 “You found me. Drinking seltzer in the shadows.”

Gina

121 “It's a sloppy Jessica. Mac n cheese, chili, pizza on a bun. Its everything I've wanted to eat for the last 48 hours.” “What happened? I thought you were gonna 'last forever bitches.'” “Turns out I gave up easy. You hear that bitches? I gave up so easy.”

122 “If NAME had a twin, he/she would have eaten him/her in the womb.”

123 “Wait a minute, I think I just figured something out. I got to go.” “Aren't you forgetting something?” [person a gives Person b a kiss on the forehead] “Uh no, pay your bill! Damn, who raised you?”

124 “The English language can not fully capture the depth and complexity of my thoughts. So I'm incorporating Emoji into my speech to better express myself. Winky face.”

125 “All right, gang. Diet day 4. How's everyone holding up?” “Honestly, I'm going to last forever. You hear that bitches? I'm gonna last forever.”

126 “If I die, turn my tweets into a book!”

127 “The only reason I didn't tell you is I don't value you as people, so why be honest?”

128 “Breakups are a cartoony thumbs down. They make people feel face-with-Xs-for-the-eyes.”

129 “I'm sorry. I just don't think this is something you're good at.” “What? The only thing I'm not good at is modesty, because I'm great at it.”

130 “Click. I just captured the exact moment you realized you had failed. I guess we all got something out of this.”

131 “It's so addictive, right? I play so much that when I close my eyes at night, I just see cupcakes instead of my normal dizzying array of flashing lights.”

132 “Forget your ex with meaningless sex. It rhymes because it's true.”

133 “NAME. NAME. NAME, I screwed up, big time.” “NAME, given your daily life experiences, you're gonna have to be more specific.”

134 “So, talk to me, goose. How are we looking?” “Sexy, but not like we're trying too hard. Like, sure, we're trying, but it's almost effortless.”

135 “Give me the ring.” “You sound like Gollum.” “That means nothing to me. I don't see those movies, I'm too pretty.”

136 “Oh no, six drink NAME isn't fun. He’s/She's just sad. Damn it!”

137 “I never have second thoughts. That's the luxury of having great first thoughts.”

138 “Ugh, constantly getting NAME’s approval is the worst.” “Yes. I can only imagine.”

139 “You think you can just bully people, but you can't. It's not okay. I'm the bully around here. Ask anyone.”

140 “This just might work out after all.” “You're damn right it will, 'cause we're a ragtag, scrappity, fart-dumb, moron parade, smart-ass team!”

141 “Okay, NAME, stop freaking out. I have the day off. I can step in and help.” “Yeah, me too. I'm not off, but I come and go as I please. It's part of my charm. I'm like an outdoor cat.”

142 “Gina, please keep an eye on NAME today. He's/She’s gonna say something to the wrong person and get himself/herself punched.” “Sure, I'd love to see NAME get punched.” “Try again.” “I will stop NAME from getting punched.” “Correct.”

143 “Oh, I want him/her out. But I'm too scared to tell him/her. “ “All right, listen. I know that your spirit animal is a caterpillar that's been stepped on —“ “Mm-hmm.”

144 “What are you creeps doing? You made me look away from my phone. You better pray I didn't miss a text.” “In the two seconds you looked away?” “Seventeen texts. All of them important.”

145 “What is my favorite soup?” “Chicken noodle.” “Potato leek.” “Corn frickin' noodle. I mean, chowder, damn it.” “You're all wrong. I've never had soup.” “Don't bother. They all suck.”

146 “Okay, so that plumber was useless. But we are two smart and capable people who can definitely figure out how to fix a toilet.” “Of course we can. The internet will tell us what to do. She always does.”

147 “It's crazy how much he/she flirts with me.”

148 “Good morning.” “For whom?” “For you-m.”

149 “So he/she didn't say what happened, which can only mean one thing.” “He's/She’s in a fight club.”

150 “What's up? How can I help?” “Well, when I was a kid, I invented a magnetic flashlight clip so I could read under the covers. This clip and I went all around the world together the Shire, Sweet Valley High, Terabithia.” “But never to a friend's house, huh?” “Uncalled for.”

Amy

151 “That stuff with us is in the past. We talked about that.” “I know, but that was before you saw me in this dope ass tux. I mean you must be freaking out.” “Oh, I really am. I'm really into rented clothes. I love how many butts have been in them.”

152 “You know, we're birds of a feather, you and I.” “I hate cliches.” “Cliches are the worst.”

153 “And now I don't know what to do.” “I think you do know what to do.” “Thanks, NAME.” [leaves the room] “I have no idea what he’s/she's gonna do but that's the safest way to give NAME advice.” “Yep.”

154 “Insult me all you want, for I have only this to say —“ “Victory shall be mine!” “I heard you practicing in the shower. You can't surprise me. Letting me into your life was the worst mistake you ever made.” “Cool, fun take on our relationship.”

155 “NAME, where you at?” “Four drinks.” “What's four-drink NAME again?” “Why don't you come over here and find out?” “Right, Horny NAME”

156 “I'm sorry. We only excluded you because you're kind of an over-texter.” “Over-texter? That's not even a thing.” “Oh really? So you don't remember the time you sent 97 unanswered texts in a five-minute span?” “My phone vibrated itself off the desk. I think it was committing suicide.”

157 “What the hell? I used NAME's exact recipe. I know I'm not a great cook, but I love following instructions.”

158 “What's going on? Is this a dream? No, I'm not holding a label maker.”

159 “My power went out last night and my alarm didn't go off.” “Your alarm is power dependent? You brought this on yourself, son.”

160 “I'd also like to apologize for my friend. His /Her parents didn't give him/her enough attention.”

161 “I'm in! A bet which improves someone's manners? Double score.”

162 “He’s/She's scared.” “He’s/She's not scared. With all due respect, NAME, NAME has no feelings.”

163 “I'm so cold even my fiery dance moves aren't keeping me warm.”

164 “I'm sorry. I tried to be myself and they hated it.”

165 “All right, someone's gotta go out there and kill that feathery bastard. NAME, you're always looking for an excuse to behead something.”

Sergeant Jeffords

166 “It was like taking candy from a baby.” “Why are you giving candy to a baby in the first place? Don't give candy to a baby! They can't brush their teeth!”

167 “I was raised on disco. Little NAME loved to hustle.”

168 “Or is your favorite artist really Taylor Swift?” [Scoffs] “No.” “Lie.” “All right, fine, she is. She makes me feel things.” “She makes all of us feel things!”

169 “Urgh, what's in these?” “Potatoes, butter, a little milk. Oh, and I ran out of salt, so I used baking soda.” “Why wouldn't you? They're both white powders. Of course they're interchangeable.” “Yeah.”

170 “I warned you against using donuts. They're my trigger food.”

171 “Hey, NAME, you know how you're really good at doodling?” “I know you think you're complimenting me, but calling them doodles is an insult. You a big fan of Picasso's doodles?”

172 “Your tone's braggy but your words are real sad.”

173 “See, NAME? Tough love works.” “Damn it! NAME proved the wrong point.”

174 “Now, be respectful and grieve your asses off.” “I don't know why this is happening.” “NAME, I love it. Everyone follow his/her lead!”

175 “Everything's spoiled. My lunch is ruined. My chicken, my potatoes, pasta, my meatballs, ham, my yogurt.” “Wow, that's a lot of yogurt.” “I love yogurt.”

176 “Kind of seemed like you were gonna get up and leave after saying all that.” “I was, but I think I hear NAME.”

177 “You better look cute in this picture, or no one's gonna want you. Do something with your damn paws!”

178 “My tolerance has really changed since I had kids!”

179 “I'm hungry!” “Oh, you're in luck; the fanny pack is filled with granola.” “Mmm! Loose granola.” “I don't want fanny granola! I want steaks and whiskey!”

180 “You probably can't tell, but I'm flexing my brain like crazy right now.”

181 “What's that smell? That's lavender. NAME loves lavender.”

182 “Okay. Excuse me. Can we please eat? My body is starting to digest itself. NAME needs nutrients!”

183 “Don't look at me. NAME wastes all that time building muscles, make him do it.” “Oh, come on, you all know these are just for show.”

184 “Sorry? You bumbling son of a bitch. You just ruined my life. I hope you get hit by a truck and a dog takes a dump on your face.” “Nothing to see here. Just a little hypoglycaemic rage. Move along.”

185 “I feel like a proud mama hen whose baby chicks have learned to fly!”

Hitchcock

186 “NAME, why do you have your shirt off?” “Can't spill food on your shirt if you're not wearing one.”

187 “What bet? What are you guys talking about?” “Seriously? The bet? They've been keeping score all year. It comes up all the time. What are you doing all day?!” “Nothing. Why, you want to hang out?”

188 “So you just want us to lie on the ground and do nothing like a bunch of losers?” “Yes, precisely.” “No!” “Jackpot!”

189 “I don't like it. Something stinks.” “Well, I'm sorry, but I refuse to mask my natural musk with a bunch of chemicals.”

190 “My God. NAME, are you the only person still making sense?” “Yeah. It's bad.”

191 “All right, food is ready, decorations are set, guests should start arriving any moment, and the chairs are still perfection.” “He/She said they're perfection. I'm so proud of you, buddy.” “It was you. You made this happen.”

192 “Who do you think it's gonna be?” “I've no idea.” “I bet it's me. I just hope I'm ready.”

193 “Okay, look, this was maybe a weird way to start the night, but the good news is, we can still make our dinner reservation and no one got hurt.” “Actually, I cut myself real bad.” “Of course you did.”

Scully

194 “Oh, so your plan is to not take this seriously at all?” “Oh, I am as serious as a heart attack. No offense, NAME.” “Nah. Mine are never that serious. I call 'em ‘oopsies’.”

195 “I miss my home chair.” “You miss a chair?”

196 “Are those thumbtacks? What the hell, NAME?” “I thought they'd make good confetti.” “Why?”

197 “All right, anyone else have questions? NAME, NAME, you've been weirdly silent.” “We didn't want to say anything that would get us uninvited.”

198 “Okay, first of all, I want to say that this was one of the hardest decisions I've ever had to make. There is so much talent in this room.” “Just tell us, bitch. Act as if you already have the role.”

199 “I'll be back. Don't move.” “Not a problem. I hate moving.”

200 “Where should we begin? Do you have any experience with puzzles?” “Yes. I've never solved one.”

[kingofthenorth49]

Can someone check the GFCI?

When a circuit breaker snaps, it’s because the circuit was beginning to heat beyond design capacity and it’s shutting down to prevent something worse from happening, like fire or damage to a sensitive circuit or device.

It’s a safety device, and we all know how much I love safety devices, but at the end of the day if you don’t take action when a safety device activates, generally the damage can be much worse than what the device was actually protecting.

Folks, our owners have decided that it’s going to be much easier to control the world if they only have to do it from one government, and if you still think this is a conspiracy theory, you need to turn off CNN and step outside your basement. Even the dimwit in Ottawa can no longer keep the secret of where those in lofty chambers have decided we are going, although I sincerely doubt he understands the repercussions, just like 98% of the population. It’s not their fault, they are wired in such a way they can’t see the truth, either by design or programming.

Doesn’t matter which it is (blue dress/brown dress), the damage to our population has started and we don’t have the collective will to stop it, because we’ve been conditioned to be victims. Correction. Most have been conditioned over the past two decades to be victims, to be at the mercy of big government and those who know better than you do.

I’ve a friend who explains it perfectly. He says that most people cannot see past the end of any given month. It’s not a derogatory thing, it’s just who they are. These are the people who live paycheck to paycheck, who don’t plan for the future because they are just trying to stay alive. They work hard to keep up, but are consumed by just trying to cope with what life throws at them. These are the majority of people on this planet. Not a bad thing, but these are the type of people easily controlled by fear.

The next group are the people who can see 6 to 12 months, and they understand cause and effect better than the first group. They understand that payday loans are bad and that you should control your destiny through planning. These are the type of people who run our governments and provide services. They see the benefits to organized approaches to problems and find safety in numbers of like minded people.

The last group, the smallest one are those who can see 3 to 5 years down the road. These are the visionaries, people like Edison and Orwell, Tesla and Rand. These are the Elon Musks and Bill Gates of the world. They drive humanity through aspiration and ambition.

Unfortunately they aren’t always right, for example I would consider Karl Marx to one of the latter.

So why am I talking about Karl Marx and circuit breakers you ask?

Well it’s because my tin foil hat is on too tight, or because I’m not quite right in the head I guess, or any other of the labels those who can’t see past the end of the month would paste to someone like me who likes to think a bit more long term than the end of the next season of the Kardasians.

Shutting down the world for a bad flu wasn’t a decision based in science. It’s not even a decision based in safety, and believe me I know a thing or two about that. The whole “nobody moves, nobody gets hurt” thing really doesn’t work for long. Sure, nobody gets hurt, but no body eats either. This is what your average person isn’t thinking about when they scream “stay the blazes home”.

Yes, you can stay the blazes home. Yes,  you can cower under your bed until the bad thing passes, but at the end of the day the Magic Pantry was just a kids TV show.

Dude’s gotta eat, right?

I’m currently living inside the “Atlantic Bubble”, or whatever is left of it after those anointed in oil decided to take their toys and go home, but in reality we’ve created an interesting paradigm here on the east coast of Canada that’s unlike anywhere else in the world.

We’ve created the perfect culture of fear.

Now for those living outside the bubble, we’ve shut the door, turned off the lights and posted a big “FUCK OFF” sign on the front lawn. We’ve turned our back to the virus like it’s a Trump supporter. This is our plan. We’ve posted guards, created intricate rules around who can go where and why, and basically made it impossible to move anywhere without government permission. All over a bad flu with a survivalbility rate of over 99.4%, with 70%+ of the mortality coming from those 70 years of age and older. You are more likely to die from an automobile accident today than COVID.

Don’t get me wrong, COVID is no cake walk, it’s a nasty disease, but it’s not Ebola. I’ve been battling this virus now for 11 months, I’ve seen how it works, it’s veracity is substantial, and if you have co-morbidities such as diabetes or heart disease, it can take a toll on you, and yes, more people are dying from it than the seasonal flu, but at the end of the day it’s not going to wipe out the human race. The majority of the people who test positive don’t even know they have it.

And don’t get me started on testing.

I can’t talk publicly about it but if you see me out and about, ask me why I think testing is a control and not a diagnostic element. Sorry, the hat’s tightening.

Let me throw one example out for you to chew on, let’s say vaccines. Now the vaccines are the panacea for the masses right? I mean we should be amazed we were able to concoct a vaccine that is 95% effective in eradicating this virus inside 8 to 10 months, hell, we should be ecstatic, right? I mean it took 30+ years to get a handle on AIDS and we beat COVID in just 240 days. We currently linbe up to get an annual flu shot to protect us from the last major Coronavirus (Remember the Spanish Flu?) that has been in development for the last 60 years and it’s still only 35-40% effective, and less than 50% of Canadians get it

We must be freaking geniuses now.

I’ll never understand the sheer amount of dumb optimism that’s out there, but I certainly appreciate it. Without that optimism we’d be more like Lemmings than we currently are.

But back to the “great reset”, shall we?

So dude’s gotta eat, right? I’m going to quote one of my modern day heros, Elon Musk when he says “If people wants stuff, they have to make it” or something along those lines. In other words, there’s no money tree. My parents very early on taught me that lesson, and that if I wanted anything in life I had to earn it or make it, that there was no such thing as a free meal. The problem is most people today have been conditioned to think there is. Trudeau has been giving away our money like a drunken sailor on shore leave to the tune of $400 BILLION dollars in 8 months. Let me put it another way, in the last 240 days Trudeau has spent $10,814.00 per Canadian citizen, or around $25K per taxpayer. That’s debt folks, that’s directly on the shoulders of every Canadian. But it’s ok they say because interest rates are so low we can afford the additional leverage.

Problem is folks is interest rates don’t stay low after a major crisis. Why? It’s called inflation. As money supply loosens, so does the value of a dollar, and when the value of a dollar decreases because there’s more supply of dollars then prices increase. When prices start increasing wages need to go up to keep pace with inflation, and when that happens there are two options. Control monetary supply, otr deal with runaway inflation.

How do you control inflation you ask? Great question. You raise interest rates to throttle spending.

How can anyone forget the late 1970’s? It was less than 50 years ago folks. Remember Trudeau’s 6 & 5? Anyone? Bueller? Bueller? JUSTIN? For fuck sakes the kid was living at 22 Sussex drive when his father created the greatest economic challenge of our lifetime.

Wait, check that. Apparently the second wave will be worse than the first.

This great reset is gong to be tragic. Already they are estimating over 100 Million people in 3rd world countries will die next year due to disease and starvation because of the lock downs. In our own western countries the most disadvantages are already our most vunerable populations. Humans aren’t meant to be caged, nor can we afford to be. We need to be free, have purpose, and contribute to a vibrant society.

You can’t govern that. You can’t rule over a captive society for long. History has shown us that time and time again that King’s aren’t benevolent rulers and those who suffer the most are at the bottom the societal ladder.

If you aren’t seeing the end goal yet, I get it, but I do. You only need look as far as the ice cream eating elite who enjoy fine dining when your cupboard is near empty and jet off to Mexico while telling you can’t bury your spouse or child. They make you endure cruel mental anguish while they spend your tax dollars on jet setting and pontificating about a communist world that they rule.

All in the name of a better world, one free of climate change and racism.

Who knows, maybe they are right, maybe they are part of the component of society that sees the future more clearly than the rest of us.

I guess that’s why they get ice cream and can go spend Thanksgiving with their moms while you can’t bury yours.

I guess that’s just our lot in life, to be ruled, to understand it’s for thee, but not for me.

This what we want? This what we deserve? Am I wrong?

I don’t think I am, I just want to be. Can someone go downstairs and check the fuse?

Jim Out

[lattelesbean003]

1-50 for the asks lmao (if you feel like it, but you don’t have to lskdjfls)

1. What’s your sexual orientation?

I’m lesbian! 🏳️‍🌈

2. What are you obsessed with right now?

Uhh, I’m really into Haikyuu!! again. I’m still kinda obsessed with Marvel though lol.

3. Ever done any drugs?

Only prescribed drugs.

4. What piercings do you want?

Ohh, so many. I want three piercing on the lobes of both my ears and a couple cartridge piercings. I’ve kinda thought about a nose ring? But I’m not sure. As a start though I need to get over my fear of needles and actually get my ears pierced.

5. How many people have you kissed?

None.

6. Describe your dream home.

Okay okay. I want a one or two bedroom apartment in Montreal, Quebec. (NYC would be the dream but hahahhhh way too expensive). The kitchen would have dark cabinets with a white counter top, a nice deep sink with a movable faucet, obviously a dishwash and stove, a pretty big stainless steel fridge, a stainless steel microwave, and a toaster. I’d have a nice, big, comfy couch in the living room. There’d be lots of plants (I love plants), and a little table by a window for a ‘dining’ room. Bedroom would be big enough to fit a double or queen bed. Oh! I’d also have bookcases everywhere cause I love books and manga lol.

7. Who are you jealous of?

There are a few fanfic writers that I’m jealous of just cause they’re really good at writing and my dumbass feels inferior and bad about myself. It’s one of the things I hate about myself. I get insecure wayyy too easily.

8. What’s your favorite show to binge?

Right now, Haikyuu!!. I binged it pretty quickly and it’s turning into a comfort show for me lol.

9. Do you watch porn?

I have before, but it makes me uncomfortable.

10. Do you have a secret sideblog?

I do have a blog that I run that I haven’t told anyone about.

11. If you could teleport anywhere in the world right now, where would you go?

Florence, Italy. I wanna go back so baddd.

12. What’s one of your fantasies?

Living a good and happy life and not feeling insecure about literally everything

13. Do you have/would you get your nipples pierced?

No I wouldn’t. Exposing my chest to anyone makes me very uncomfortable. Also, the idea of nipple piercings is very bizarre to me but hey, you do you boo.

14. How would you spend a million dollars?

I would buy way too many books and clothes lmao. Also food. If I didn’t set aside some of it for college, I’d spend it on dumb stuff like that.

15. Are you in a relationship?

No, but I wish. I’d love a girlfriend.

16. Do you follow porn blogs?

Nope!

17. Are you angry with anyone right now?

I’m not angry with anyone, just feeling insecure about my relationship with a couple people cause my brain is stupid.

18. What tattoos do you want?

I want a full sleeve tattoo! Idk what the art would be, mostly because I haven’t actually thought about it toooo much because tattoos involve needles and pain and those are two of my biggest fears. (Failure takes the number one spot though.)

19. If you could change your name, would you? What would you change it to?

Oh uh, idk man. I’ve never thought about it. I’d just stick with Jen.

20. What is something you’re obsessed with?

For fandoms, Haikyuu!! right now, but I love sweet things way too much. Also, bread.

21. Describe your best friend.

Tall, adventurous, takes no shit, smart

22. Tag someone you think is hot.

@ms-bookdragon ;)

23. Who are five of your favorite bands/musical artists?

I mostly like specific songs, rather than one artist. Here are my top five at the moment:

Piano Man / Billy Joel

My Love Will Never Die / AG, Claire Wyndham

Toss a Coin to Your Witcher / Samual Kim, Black Gryphon (I like the remix more than the original)

Dance Monkey / Tones and I

The Sound of Silence / Disturbed

24. What are three places you want to travel?

I really want to go to Quebec (and I might be able to this summer!!), Japan, and Greece. (I also wanna return to Italy).

25. Describe your perfect Friday night.

Sharing lots of laughs with friends.

26. What’s your favorite season?

Spring! I don’t mind winter if it snows, but where I live it mostly rains and it’s annoying lol. We’ve only had like, four dry days since the new year.

27. What’s your pet peeve?

LOUD CHEWING OMG I CAN’T STAND IT. Also when anything scraps against metal. Makes me cringe and tense up like nothing else.

28. Who is the funniest person you know?

A gay guy in my chem class. Also my neighbor. They both have very weird senses of humor but I appreciate them lol.

29. What’s the most overrated movie?

Avengers: Endgame. :3 (I will forever hate that movie lol.)

30. Tag someone you want to talk to but have been too shy to message.

Oh god why you gotta do this to me. @voxofthevoid. Ahh he only knows me from my main not my sideblog. 😭

31. Do you like paper books or ebooks better?

Paper books don’t hurt my eyes as much. I don’t think I could read a paper version of a fanfic though.

32. If you could live in a fictional world, what world would you pick?

Oh oof, uhh none of them? They’re all kinda shitty worlds lol. 

33. If money was no object, what would your wardrobe be like?

Lots of button-ups and sweaters. Jeans, converse, scarves, nice dresses and skirts. I don’t have a specific wardrobe, I mostly buy whatever catches my eye.

34. What’s your coffee order?

Depends on my mood, but I mostly buy ice caps at Tim Hortons. Sometimes a french vanilla. At proper coffee shops, I buy a latte or mocha. I can’t handle a normal latte yet though, so it’s normally a caramel latte or something. At Starbucks, I typically buy a caramel frappuccino. When it’s cold, a mocha latte. (The peppermint mocha is yummy.)

35. Do you have a crush on anyone?

Nope, kinda wish I did though. 

36. Do you still have feelings for any of your exes?

Nope! I have on ex and mostly avoid him lol.

37. Have any tattoos?

No, but as I mentioned above I’d love a full sleeve tattoo.

38. Do you drink?

Nah, I’m still underage, alcohol is gross, and I’m not popular enough to be invited to parties.

39. Are you a virgin?

Yis. Still haven’t gotten my first kiss too.

40. Do you have a crush on any of your mutuals?

No

41. How many followers do you have?

On this account, tumblr claims 39, but it’s actually 24 lmao. I have a joint account with another person that has over 1000 followers though.

42. Describe the hottest person you know.

She has a long mousy brown hair, a bunch of ear piercings, really adorable dimples, and a very nice smile. I’m like 99% she’s straight though.

43. What’s your guilty pleasure?

I indulge too much in junk food. 

44. Do you read erotica?

Yupp. I mean, if you count fanfic with sex in them plus the occasional doujinshi.

45. What’s the worst date you’ve ever been on?

The one date I’ve been on wasn’t too bad, but the dude I went out with thought we were a couple after the one date. I feel kinda bad because I led him on for two weeks, unsure how to break it to him that I discovered I was gay soooo.

46. How many people do you follow?

100, but like over half of them aren’t very active.

47. If you could marry any celebrity, who would you pick?

Hmmmmmmm. I don’t have a specific crush on anyone, but maybe Sebastian Stan just cause I wanna be his friend. He’s too old though lol.

48. Describe your ideal partner.

A girl (obviously), who’s could drag me to social events, but also enjoy a quiet night at home. Funny, encouraging/supportive, kind. Also lots of cuddles. I love cuddling and hand holding, plus cheek kisses!! Ahhh

49. Who do you text the most?

Two of my irl friends. They’re both great. I also text the person I have a joint blog with.

50. What’s your favorite kind of weather?

A warm spring day. The sun isn’t too hot, the grass is a lush green, and there’s only a handful of clouds in the sky. On the flip side, if I don’t have to go to school, I love snow. Walking around my neighborhood when it’s totally quiet and peaceful is one of my favorite things to do.

[buried-stars]

i may not be the worlds #1 arata stan but i can pretend. tell me abt 7, 11, 17, 28, 35 (please tell me he has a shitty plastic houseplant), 40, 46, 65, 70, 77 but hiroki doesnt count, 86, 90

sam i would happily name you #1 arata stan

again this is long! cutting!

7) Do they like chocolate?

LOVES IT! half his diet is shitty dollar store chocolate, its like a comfort food. one time minoru gets him some fancy chocolates as a thank you for a favour and arata’s pissed for a week bc now the dollar store chocolate isnt good enough

11) Do they believe in luck?

to some degree! certainly believes his own luck is god awful

17) Do they have a best friend? If so, who, and what makes them their best friend?

up until middle school it was keiko mizushima and i’m sure you can guess how that turned out. they were both in the “we’re so fucking bad at math” corner as kids and bonded through that. currently his best friends would be hiroki and minoru! hiroki plans chaos and just kind of drags the other two into it. it’s a bonding activity. arata’s getting out of his shell

28) If they could have one wish, what would they wish for?

to be able to go back to That One Day and stop himself from saying what he did to keiko. god. god holy shit.

35) Do they own a plant?

HE DOES HAVE A SHITTY PLASTIC HOUSEPLANT its name is olives. arata waters it whenever he remembers. he can’t have a real plant because his cat tiger would try to eat it. he tries to eat olives too but tends to give up.

40) If I wanted to draw them, what would be distinct physical features that I would have to know to draw them correctly?

SAM... he has three large scars on his face and those are like. kind of necessary to drawing him. also his hair always looks like he just walked into an electric fence. nobody knows why

46) Have they ever won a contest before? If so, what for? What did they win? 

he did a poetry contest in school once but he only won because everyone else forfeit fdjhgfdghjjhdgfs he won a small cash prize and a jar of jellybeans

65) What makes them smile?

you know what the sad answer is but the happy answer is: other people’s smiles, people reading his writing, being able to have a long, engaging conversation with someone, little physical touches. hugs.

70) What do you, the creator of this OC, like most about them?

i like his sense of humour! he’s kind of unintentionally funny too because he’s so fucking tired constantly that he has like. no filter whatsoever and it’s just really fun to write.

77) Who would cheer them up after a long day?

HIS DAD. i love arata’s dad. he’s a good dude. also his sister if she was in the country at the time

86) What is something they can’t leave home without?

his fucking typewriter because he’s a useless fucking piece of shit nerd. more seriously, headphones so he can ignore people

90) What is a joke that they would find funny? 

“They all laughed when I said I wanted to be a comedian. Well, they’re not laughing now!”

[thesportssoundoff]

“Singapore with a singaBORE main” UFC Fight Night: Askren vs Maia preview

Joey

October 20th, 2019

When the UFC signed up to do a multi million dollar stretch of shows in Singapore, I have to imagine this wasn't QUITE on the menu. This show isn't awful but compared to what's coming down the pike with the MSG card, the Vegas PPV, a really solid card in South Korea and such, this card is only worth discussing due to its early start time. Still there's good stuff to discuss here! It's a nifty 11 fight card starting early in the morning with some good HW fights on it and an "intriguing" main event. Let's see what happens.

Fights: 11

Debuts: Loma Lookboonmee, Don'tale Mayes

Fight Changes/Injury Cancellations: 4 (Karol Rosa vs Julia Avila CANCELLED/Jarjis Danho vs Greg Hardy CANCELLED/Yan Xionan OUT, Randa Markos IN vs Ashley Yoder/Brad Tavares vs Ian Heinisch CANCELLED)

Headliners (fighters who have either main evented or co-main evented shows in the UFC): 6 (Demian Maia, Stevie Ray, Michael Johnson, Beneil Dariush, Sergey Pavlovich, Randa Markos)

Fighters On Losing Streaks in the UFC:

Fighters On Winning Streaks in the UFC: 7 (Demian Maia, Muslim Salikhov, Laureano Staropoli, Beneil Dariush, Maurice Green, Ashley Yoder, Sergey Pavlovich)

Main Card Record Since Jan 1st 2017 (in the UFC): 17-19-1

Ben Askren- 1-1 Demian Maia- 3-3 Michael Johnson- 2-3 Stevie Ray- 2-3 Muslim Salikhov- 2-1 Laureano Staropoli- 2-0 Beneil Dariush- 2-2-1 Frank Camacho- 2-3 Cyril Gane- 1-0 Don'Tale Mayes- 0-0

Fights By Weight Class (yearly number here):

Lightweight- 3 (69) Heavyweight- 3 (34) Welterweight-  2 (64) Women’s Strawweight- 2 (28) Featherweight-  1 (53)

Women’s Flyweight-  (31) Middleweight-  (40) Light Heavyweight-  (39) Bantamweight- (53) Flyweight-  (15) Women’s Featherweight- (8) Women’s Bantamweight-  (18)

2019 Number Tracker

Debuting Fighters (37-58-1)- Loma Lookboonmee, Don'tale Mayes

Short Notice Fighters (28-36)- Randa Markos

Second Fight (52-35)- Movsar Evloev, Raphael Pessoa, Ciryl Gane, Rafael Fiziev

Cage Corrosion (Fighters who have not fought within a year of the date of the fight) (22-38-1)-

Undefeated Fighters (38-37-2)- Ciryl Gane, Movsar Evloev

Fighters with at least four fights in the UFC with 0 wins over competition still in the organization (11-8)- Frank Camacho, Stevie Ray

Weight Class Jumpers (Fighters competing outside of the weight class of their last fight even if they’re returning BACK to their “normal weight class”) (29-22)- Michael Johnson

Twelve Precarious Ponderings

1- I've seen some folks who take the Askren vs Maia booking as some sort of punishment for Askren because it's an early morning show overseas BUT let's be 100% fair and point out that Askren spent the better part of the last 4-5 years fighting in Asia and SHOULD have some semblance of name recognition. In this case he probably serves more good as the main eventer on a random Asian show than he does as the 3rd or 4th fight in MSG or what have you. I mean if he doesn't then why did you even sign him?

2- Who is this main event appealing to? I can understand SOME genuine appeal in this fight for the grappling purists out there I suppose but even that feels limited. I just think if you took 100 MMA fans and brought them into a room and said "Would you like five rounds of Askren vs Maia?", the slimmest of slim percentage of them would say "Oh man, love it. Bring me all of that." It's a fine main event pitting name value vs name value and I guess style vs style but the appeal feels so limited. I really hope this isn't what that group in Singapore expected to be paying for when they made this multi-million dollar deal with the UFC for the next five years or so.

3- Even with a win, is Askren officially "done" in terms of flirtations as a #1 contender? Usually a win over Demian Maia takes you right to #1 contender status. In this instance, it feels like Askren is sort of kind of in the Vitor range where anything short of a string of stoppages will keep him firmly from the title picture.

4- Is  Michael Johnson vs Stevie Ray the most random co-main of 2019? I can't imagine it's got a lot of competition for the spot.

5- Laureano Staropoli vs Muslim Salikhov is a really interesting fight for a variety of reasons. For starters, Staropoli has real potential to become yet another solid Argentinian fighter in the UFC's fold. He's 2-0 and coming off a decision win over Thiago Alves in Brazil. He's a balanced striker who seems to excel in those back and forth firefights where he can outlast his opposition. Thats going to be a problem against Muslim Salikhov who is beginning to find his groove in the UFC. Every second this fight stays standing and at a pace befitting of Muslim is a second closer to losing in a most brutal fashion. Can Staropoli wrestle more than we've seen him do so far?

6- If I had a fighter like Frank Camacho, I'm not sure that I'd put him up against a guy who is primarily coming to wrestle with Beneil Dariush. Dariush is going to try to Drew Dobert it except he can't strike as good as Dober so we're setting up for a lot of wall and stall. Thumbs down.

7- If you're not hot on heavyweights, lemme chit chat with you a bit about how some of these HW fights are pretty good:

With the UFC talking about doing a show in France in 2020, Ciryl Gane figures to be an impressive dude to follow. The muay thai stud/Ngannou sparring buddy won his UFC debut without much issue and the French born fighter will be given ample opportunities to show out. Dontale Mayes is the rare THREE time DWCS talent who lost his first fight but won the next two by stoppage. Mayes' upside may be in a role like this as a hard hitting prospect tester. One thing which stood out was how much weight he lost between all three Contenders Series fights.

Sergey Pavlovich vs Maurice Greene is a REALLY interesting fight. Mo Greene was a bit of a gimmick who got the villain edit on TUF but he's fought three times while the winner of the show has pretty much disappeared. Greene hits really hard, attacks from awkward angles, doesn't have good wrestling but has some wacky BJJ off of his back and so far his cardio hasn't been awfl. On the other hand, Sergey Pavlovich has gone from Russian prospect du jour to "maybe he's good?" UFC fighter. Pavlovich's first win was against Junior Albini and Mo Greene's best win as of right now is Junior Albini so here we are. Good evenly matched fight on paper.

Raphael Pessoa vs Jeff Hughes kicks off the show and Huges was considered to be one of the top HW prospects prior to getting into the UFC. To this point he was upset by Maurice Greene (who he had beaten on the regional circuit) and looked to be potentially en route to getting slop stopped by Todd Duffee prior to an eye poke no contest. This is like the bottom of the barrel in terms of opposition and if Hughes loses this one, his career is in deep doo doo.

8- Speaking of Maurice Greene, can we just pretend that he won the TUF season if he wins this fight vs Pavlovich?

9- Enrique Barzola vs Mosvar Evloev is an interesting fight because it pits arguably the most exciting Russian prospect in the UFC under 155 lbs against a really solid featherweight who can do some stuff to challenge Evloev. Barzola's a superb wrestler who has endless pressure and cardio while Evloev has excelled thus far in the UFC as a slower paced grappling machine despite showing more on Russia's regional circuit. We haven't seen Barzola do much counter wrestling and Evloev figures to test that in spades IF he fights like he did in his debut.

10- Randa Markos is still relevant at 115 lbs which feels like a credit to her but also a knock on the speed (or lack thereof) by which this division is advancing.

11- Who has the cardio advantage between Maia and Askreen going into the championship rounds? Gotta be Ben, right?

12- Is this the most irrelevant card of the year?

[sawyersick]

all the questions for that ask game!!! (or as many as you want lol)

holy fuck bee............................. ok get red E its a Lot

1. You woke up naked next to the last person you texted, what would you say?

Idk what I would say but I probably wouldn’t be that freaked out... the last person I texted is a good friend/coworker and I trust him

2. What’s going on between you and the last person you kissed?

I uhhh can’t remember who the last person I kissed was because it was years ago but let’s assume it was my ex..... he was a toxic pos who tore me down because he had low self esteem so yeah I don’t really like him

3. If your boyfriend or girlfriend was into drugs, would you care?

I would be upset if it was anything more than weed or the ocassional drink or if it was a full blown addiction and I would be mad if they didn’t tell me on principle...

 Also I would not be very comfortable if they did it around me because I’m a weenie despite hanging out in hardcore punk groups...... also I can’t stomach the smell of cigarettes im sorry

4. Is your last name longer than six letters?

nope! 

5. Was your last kiss drunk or sober?

sober, I don’t drink

6. Have you ever wanted to have someone but you messed it up?

like..... as a significant other? I guess. I’m pretty bad at telling my feelings to people and I’m kinda clingy when I like someone. idk if I’ve ever *explicitly* messed it up tho

7. What does your last received text say?

“sick” and then the sparkly heart emoji five times 

8. How many times have you kissed the last person you kissed?

lots and lots and lots.... unfortunately. we were together for a year and a half

9. Where was your last kiss at?

fuck bitch I don’t remember.............. school? my house? his house? the pool??? man the last five months of that relationship were affection-less

10. When is the last time you saw your sister?

I don’t have one!

11. What do you drink in the morning?

water and sometimes tea

12. Where did you sleep last night?

the car and then my bed when I got home

13. Do you think relationships are hard?

I mean everything takes effort... I don’t find it hard to do things for people in my relationships but I get frustrated when it isn’t reciprocated and I burn out

14. If you could go back and change something in the past 5 months, would you?

nah

15. You’re locked in a room with the last person you kissed, any problems?

yes....................... many..........................

16. Would you rather it be sunny or rainy?

I TRIED to be a good emo and like the rain but tbh I get really reasonally depressive so I prefer the sun 100%

17. Do you know anyone with the same middle name as you?

nope!

18. Are you wearing jeans,sweatpants,or pajama pants?

jeans!

19. Do you think you will be in a relationship 3 years from now?

hopefully!! I met this real cute punk boy last night

20. Does anyone like you?

HA I doubt it......... I usually come off as the little sister type to most people

21. Have you ever kissed someone with a name that starts with an S?

nope! 

22. Is the last person you kissed gay?

probably

I suspected that he had internalized homophobia but also he was weirdly transphobic to me so I dropped it and pretended to be a cis girl around him which is weird because I think he liked boys??????????????????

23. Is there a person you CANNOT stand?

YES this girl from high school who talked about tentacle porn to school admins for no reason and did lots of other weird shit 

24. Have you ever considered getting a tattoo?

yes! I have a whale on my hip and I want to get tiny scissors on my arm soon

25. In the past week have you cried?

yes I watched queer eye and a disney movie lol

26. What breed was the last dog you saw?

I follow like 12 samoyeds on instagram but the last dog I saw irl was this ADORABLE black lab who was a service dog and he rested his head on his human’s lap when she sat down in the library and I wanted to cry

27. Do you dry off in the shower or out of the shower?

I have a towel hanging right out side the shower so I grab it, then step out of the shower

28. Have you ever kissed a football player?

hm idk I think so? I definitely kissed a guy who played tennis but he forced it on me so I don’t count it

29. Do you think you’re old?

yes because I hate tiktok

30. Do you like text messaging?

I don’t mind it!! The service at my house sucks tho so I prefer cloud based texting like instagram or facebook messenger

31. What type of day are you having?

A good but slow one! I had a really good night last night so I’m just resting now

32. Have you ever thought about getting your nose pierced?

I’d honestly rather get snake bites if I were to get a piercing but in general I’m afraid of facial piercings

33. Do you prefer warm or cold weather?

warm! then I can head down to the lake :)

34. Is there a person of the opposite sex who means a lot to you?

yes! he’s one of my best friends and I talk to him every day and he lives in scotland and I’d like to meet him one day

35. Would you prefer a relationship or a fling?

relationship! Flings personally make me feel icky and I’m over that

36. Are you a simple or complicated person?

I’d like to think I’m complicated but I’m a simple man..................... you show me whale, I like

37. What song are you listening to?

any song by Liily, all day every day

38. When you say you’re sorry do you mean it?

yes! I perpetually feel bad about everything!!!!!!39. Is there a girl that knows everything or almost everything about you?

there was! but not anymore because she ghosted me for no reason40. What made you start liking the person you like now?

This person is so cute and kind and creative and nice and sweet and fashionable!!!! and fun to mosh with!!!!!41. When did you last receive a text message?

half an hour ago ish???42. What is wrong with you right now?

I am constantly depressed and there’s nothing I can do about it exceot keep myself insanely busy but that means there’s no breather for me and also I probably have adhd but can’t afford a therapist43. How well do you know the last female you texted?

FeMaLe dude just say chick

pretty well! I like her favourite band and we talk like once a week at the very least44. Does anyone disgust you?

yes my ex was very nasty and tore people down to his level and also this one person from high school who fucked over my friends 45. Would you date someone right now if they asked?

depends on who.... eye emoji............. but probably yes I have low standards46. Are you in a good mood right now?

yes!47. Who was the last person you talked to in person?

my parents? but other than that it was thanking Nick from the band Unpopular Opinion for the lovely tabling opportunity last night48. What color shirt are you wearing?

white T shirt with a cat pink sweater with a cat49. Has someone recently told you something you didn’t want to hear?

yes one of my parents says nasty things when in a bad mood50. Anyone you’re giving up on?

yes my former best friend who ghosted me and this girl who keeps flaking on plans with me and also a boy who got mixed up in weird drama with me and his ex that I never wanted to be a part of51. Do you hate the person you fell hardest for?

I’ve never really falen hard for anyone, just periods of obsession. I guess I’m waiting for that one sPeCiAl sOmEoNe

52. Have you ever thought about giving up on someone but couldn’t?

yes, but I’ll settle for waiting53. Do you like rain?

a little of it!54. Do you care if your boyfriend/girlfriend drinks?

I’d rather they not be a alcholoic because I had a raging drunk coworker who scared the shit out of me once but I guess I’d be okay with the ocasional drink/drunk night as long as they’re safe55. Have you ever liked somebody and never told them?

So many times... I keep my mouth shut because it would never work for one reason or another...... also I’m so SICK of having to make the move all the time I just want to be fawned over I’ve never had anyone do ANYTHING romantic for me 56. Do you like to cuddle?

.......................yes57. Are you shy?

not normally! I LOVE being social but in relationships yeah because I’m insecure58. Do you get along with girls?

yes? girls who don’t get along with girls are lame...... lift each other up don’t tear yaselves down59. Have you dated the person you texted last?

nope! But I’ll admit I thought about it haha60. What do you carry with you at all times?

chapstick, money, and pepper spray

ya boy don’t mess around61. If you were paid 1 million dollars to spend the night in a supposed haunted house, would you?

depends on the haunted levels, as long as the “ghost” would only watch/appear and not scream or whatever or try to make contact I guess that would be fine? but if It tries to disturb me I’m yeeting mysef the fuck outta here because ya boy needs uninterrupted beauty rest62. Do you think you can last in a relationship for five months?

yep! I dragged one out for a year and a half when I really should have ended things much sooner than that63. Think back to October, were you in a relationship?

nope! Been single for around two years now64. The person you like kisses you on the forehead, do you find this cute?

YES HOLY SHIT65. Did anything “cute” happen in the last week?

I fired some pieces in my pottery class! my mugs and bowls came out so well

and I met the cutest punk boy last night!!!!!! he’s so cute and very my type and I got to dance with him in the mosh pit!!!!!!!!!! tell me that’s not the cutest punk thing ever

66. How old are the last three people you kissed?

19, 18(17???), and 21

67. Would you rather pay to get your nails done or do them yourself?    

I’ve only gotten them done once! It was very enjoyable but I’m a cheapskate so I’d probably rather do them myself68. Which do you like better- Zebra print or leopard print?    

leopard print I guess69. Do you have any stickers on your car?    

one! A turtle from the Maui Ocean Center. I’d like to add a few more sea-related ones and maybe a totoro I bought at a con a few years back70. Would you rather listen to Luke Bryan or Lil Wayne?    

literally who the fuck even are these people71. Blackberry, Android, or iPhone?   

android 4 lyfe72. When’s the last time you had pizza from Pizza Hut?    

never? my DnD group would get round table or little caesars73. Do you like diet soda?    

I guess? I like it the same as diet soda74. What color are the walls in your room?    

one purple wall and the other three are pastel mint75. Are you 16 or older?    

yeah baybee76. Do you watch Pretty Little Liars?  

nope  77. Do you have a job?   

yep! I’m a windsurfing instructor   78. What are your initials?    

ZSKMTS

but usually I go by SS79. Did you ever have braces?    

nope! I’ve got near-perfect teeth :D80. Are you from the south?    

nope!

81. What does your last status on facebook say?    

I talked about meeting my favourite band again!82. Do you still talk to the first person you ever kissed?

no because he forced himself on me when we were young and I think he remembers and is ashamed and also doesn’t live near me anymore    83. Are you closer to your mom or your dad?    

idk, I’m close but not in different ways with both of them84. Have you ever done cheerleading or gymnastics?    

I was really good at the tumbling unit in 6th grade85. What’s the last movie you saw in theaters?   

Once Upon a Time in Hollywood? I don’t go to the movies much 86. Do you smoke?    

no the smell of cigarettes makes me want to vomit87. Would you rather wear heels or flip flops?    

I love heels but I LIVE in flip flops bc california88. Is your phone touch screen?    

yes???? damn when was this ask game made89. Do you normally wear your hair straight or curly?  

straight.......... I’m too lazy to curl it  90. Have you ever snuck out of your house?  

nope! I’m a weenie  91. Would you rather swim in a river, lake, or pool?    

the ocean!!!!!!!! But I guess a pool bc I’m afraid of the flesh eating bacteria in freshwater lakes92. Have you ever made out in a car?    

no but I HAVE made out on some random person’s lawn lmao93. …Had sex in a car?  

no I’m a virgin  94. Are you single or in a relationship?   

single pringle who loves to mingle 95. What were you doing last night at midnight?    

selling my art and listening to cool bands and dancing with cute punk people!!!96. When’s the last time you saw fireworks? 

the day after the fourth of July   97. Do you like the camera on your phone?    

yes! I just got a new phone and the camera is way better than my old one

the low lighting setting is  c r i s p 98. Have you ever had a friend with benefits?  

I made out with this one friend of mine like twice and then I never did it again bc I felt icky  99. Have you ever passed out from drinking?    

no I don’t drink100. Are you friends with people on facebook that you actually hate?    

NAH BRO YOU GOTTA UNFRIEND THE FUCK OUTTA THEM NO RAGRETS 101. Have you ever had a pregnancy scare?    

nope I’m a virgin102. Name your favorite Kesha song:    

Liily? did you mean Liily???? my favourite Liily song is Wash, Toro, or The Weather103. Do you have any tan lines right now?  

yeah one from the ring I wear every day  and like a shorts tan from summer104. Would you ever wear cowboy boots with shorts?

hell yeah but ONLY if the cowboy boots are bright red or hot pink no exceptions

[bobbystompy]

68 Quotes I Enjoyed From 2019

Below are my favorite quotes from 2019. Though most occurred throughout the year, some took place before but were encountered during.

1) “I don’t bitch about Millenials.

John Entwistle once complained that he didn’t understand rap. Pete Townsend said, ‘It’s not our job to understand it. It’s our job to get the fuck out of the way.’

New generations come of age. The older generation’s job is to shut up and adapt.” - @danagould

2) “I can’t do drugs with you until we kiss.”

3) “If you pay me $50 I'll show up to your funeral but stand really far away, holding a black umbrella regardless of the weather, so that people think you died with a dark and interesting secret.” - @DanaSchwartzzz

4) “A human being is a dangerous thing to let loose in a room with itself, when it cannot think.” - Roger Ebert

5) “There are no bad bourbons, only better bourbons.” - Dave Hernandez

6) “You can’t put a dollar in a kimono.”

7) “This is how it was.” - rampant takeaway from watching ‘Superbad’ several years after its release

8) “What if I had been born fifty years before you in a house on the street where you lived / Maybe I’d be outside as you passed on your bike / Would I know? / And in a wide sea of eyes, I see one pair that I recognize” - Ben Folds, ‘The Luckiest’

9) “Learn the rules so you can break them.”

10) “Nobody makes chili for two.” - Stacy Massey

11) “‘Best city in the world,’ I mutter to myself, as i adjust my ‘driving blanket’.” - Chicago resident Deanna Belos, during the 2019 Polar Vortex

12) “Dude, no one’s ever got arrested for listening to Counting Crows.” - Ricky O’Donnell, justifying late night music volume at his party

13) Bill Belichick: We’re going to have fun tonight. Rob Gronkowski: Yes we are. We deserve it. Belichick: You’re damn right. Gronk: I haven’t stepped out in like eight months. I gotta step out tonight. Belichick: I’m with you, man. I’m even going to step out. Gronk: Oh, I like it!

A Super Bowl winning exchange.

14) Center David Andrews thanked Bill Belichick for giving him "a shot".

Belichick disagreed with it.

Andrews: Thank you for giving me a shot. Belichick: A shot? I didn't give you shit. You earned it! I don't give anything.

Another Super Bowl winning exchange.

15) “We elected one of the very worst living human beings to be President, and it's exhausting. Each and every day, it's an exhausting slog, just to exist in a world where that's true.” - Michael Schur

16) “Some of y’all always picked Odd Job when you played Goldeneye and it shows” - @thedad

17) “Any app is a dating app if you try hard enough.” - Z.W. Martin (though he says it’s lifted)

18) "Once you're as woke as I am, you learn to feel bad all the time.”

19) “Everything’s a balance beam when you’re 90.” - John Dingell

20) [I wake up in a world where The Beatles never existed]

Me: Check out this song I just wrote

[I begin playing “Ob La Di Ob La Da” without having first built up years of goodwill]

Crowd of people: Wow, this sucks ass

-- @seanoneal

21) “People change people.” - Corey Matthews, Girl Meets World

22) “The easiest thing to do on earth is not write.” - William Goldman

23) “Dan could be like a difficult uncle. I didn’t love his fire-breathing conservative politics. I didn’t love the transformation that came over his novels. In Semi-Tough, he created two benighted Texas jocks and laid their prejudices bare. He was declaring himself a member of the Mark Twain coaching tree. In later books, Dan seemed to be trying to prove he could still tell a racist joke. He insisted that his memoir—the last truly immaculate piece of writing he delivered—include a tirade against political correctness. When his editor said people might be offended, Dan said, ‘Fuck people.’

There are certain writers whose style you pilfer. Certain writers whose moral fiber you try to inherit. For me, Dan represented a third category: a writer whose aura you replicate—or, failing that, try to stand in for a while.” - Bryan Curtis, on Dan Jenkins

24) “Never marry anything. Never choose. Even in love, it's better to be chosen.” - La Dolce Vita

25) “An uncluttered, uncomplicated happy ending might sound wonderful, but it’s hardly ever satisfying. Because the value of great stories lies in the tension between desire and need, between the yearning for the ideal, and the unshakable conviction that ideals don’t really exist, at least not the way we want them to. A great story should hurt a little when it leaves us. There should be some hope, but that hope should remain somewhere just an inch beyond our fingers, because that’s the truth. Even if you had all the perfect moments in the world, you’d still be reaching.” - Zach Handlen, on the Futurama series finale

26) “You can’t see him because he has sunglasses on.” - Alissa Levy

27) “The cinema is the greatest art form ever conceived for generating emotions in its audience. That's what it does best. (If you argue instead for dance or music, drama or painting, I will reply that the cinema incorporates all of these arts).” - Roger Ebert

28) “‘Are you gonna let politics ruin a friendship?’ 

Yes tf I am

People talk about politics as if it’s this isolated, abstract concept that only matters at election time. Somebody’s politics is their world view. It’s whether they think certain human beings deserve rights. It’s how they think the world should be. And if somebody thinks that the world should be colder, meaner, less accepting and downright hostile to people that are different to them, then sure as fuck is the friendship over.”

29) “Can the Supreme Court get me mushrooms?” - J-Papp

30) “Any song under two minutes already has a head start on its way into my heart. Just scream at me and then leave me.” - Drew Magary

31) “Long neck cold beers never broke my heart.” - Clemson Tom

32) “I’d just like to point out that the last spoken words of Game of Thrones were: 

‘I once brought a jackass and a honeycomb into a brothel.’”

- @Authoroux

33) “Just once before I die, I want to toss my keys to someone and tell them ‘Bring the car around’.” - Mike Skully

34) “For all the weight they're given, last words are usually as significant as first words.” - Grand Maester Pycelle, Game of Thrones

35) “The best remedy for unrequited love is a trip around the world.” - Cheers

36) [on switching from a hotel to a motel]

Manny: I don't like the sound of that. A lot of amenities disappear when an H turns into an M. Jay: Hey when I met you, you were eating cereal out of a bucket.

-- Modern Family

37) “You and Lindsey don’t want to be ‘estranged’. Estranged is the relationship we want to have with our mothers.” - MegFil

38) “Cigarettes are undefeated.”

39) “My toes are like my fingers on my feet. I can pick stuff up with them.” - Tracy Cunningham

40) “Republicans govern without shame, Democrats shame without governing.” - Bill Maher

41) Sam: I don’t understand the vagaries of the Internet Josiah: Post often, without thought, and you’ll either get cancelled or cancel someone else.

-- Blink-155

42) “Hang a lantern on your problems.”

43) “What a weird web we weave.” - The Situation, The Jersey Shore: Family Vacation

44) “Let the ocean worry about being blue.” - Alabama Shakes, ‘Hang Loose’

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45) “Honesty without tact is cruelty.” - Shelley Rokos

46) “My whole life is the wrong porn link.”

47) “One parent can take care of 10 kids, but 10 kids cannot take care of one parent.” - Joe Gestetner, via “an old Yiddish saying”

48) “There are no heroes in the room.” - Classics of Love, ‘Gun Show’

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49) “If I am a little dismissive, it's only because of my harrowing backstory.” - Mitchell, Modern Family (on why he doesn't like sports)

50) “Every time I’m wearing black, I meet a dog.” - Tracy Cunningham

51) “Shower sex? Why would I fuck in my crying chamber” - @chridollarsign

52) “My theory about quarterbacks, having written about some of them, is you either have to believe in god or think you are a god.” - Mina Kimes

53) “The contradictions of capitalism always manifest in our lyrics if you look deeply.” - Blake Schwarzenbach of Jawbreaker, Riot Fest 2019

54) “Got a ‘hang loose’ from the weakside bartender.”

55) “It’s Jennifer’s birthday always.” - Eric Hutchinson 

56) “I can’t think of a less relevant artist in 2019 than Kanye West. A Jesus freak in a MAGA hat. Yeah, congrats dude -- you’re every grandma who watches ‘Young Sheldon’ and mails checks to Joel Osteen now.” - Dan Ozzi

57) “The past and future are in the mind. I’m in the now.” - Tom Brady, via someone else

58) “Sometimes you walk around boring places and you feel like the most exciting thing in it.” - Drew Magary

59) “Sitting is the new smoking.” - Modern Family

60) “I'll straight up fight folks at a book club and discuss books at a fight club I really don't give a shit anymore.” - George Wallace

61) “Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.” - Rose Garvey via wine country

62) “It’s all ‘ok boomer’ until you need someone who can drive stick shift.” - @OrdinaryAlso

63) “He likes the result of the math.” - Dad, talking about my worst subject frustrating during the process but satisfying in the end

64) Stepmom: Do you want a Bears urn or Alabama urn? Dad: Ask me after they play Auburn.

65) “A cold body carries a warm heart.” - Stefanos Tsitsipas’ Instagram, after his Iceland sabbatical

66) [preparing a dish called the Sandwich of Justice with his friend’s recipe]

"The fun thing about it is when you give it to someone, you can say 'Justice is served.’ That's, uh, Ryan's line. I built my whole life on the backs of my friends." - You Suck At Cooking

67) “Usually three people can keep a secret only when two of them are dead.” - The Irishman

68) “An artist can't control who consumes their content any more than a chemist can control how their chemicals are used once they're created.” - Brian Crooks

[thelightofthingshopedfor]

trying to get a cheap Xbox 360: a saga

background: several years ago I found a bunch of stuff in a dumpster, like a couple backpacks, some dried crickets (reptile food I guess), a bunch of birthday cards, and also a functional PSP with two games, an original Xbox, and a probably busted Gamecube with a controller. the whole thing was a mystery; I did eventually find the owner on Facebook because his name was on the cards and I tried to contact him to see if he wanted any of it back, especially the cards since it seemed like those might have sentimental value, and it went in his spam folder and he found my message like...three years later to say no thanks. so: free stuff for me! figured I might have a use for the Xbox eventually.

I didn’t, actually, because what are you even going to do with an original Xbox, but then once I finally got through Silent Hill 2 and 3 I started hunting around to see how hard it would be to play any of the other games. and I discovered, first of all, that Silent Hill: Homecoming has no trophies or achievements on Playstation or Steam, which is where I had it on my wish list, but it does have Xbox 360 achievements; that Silent Hill 4 is also supposed to be good but it hasn’t been re-released on anything newer than PS2/Xbox, because Konami hates putting in any effort to make money; that it’s possible to get Silent Hill 4 for like ten bucks if you go with the Xbox version; and also that an Xbox 360, in what appears to be its only major advantage over the PS3, can natively play any original Xbox game. so then obviously I fixated on getting a cheap Xbox 360, because that doubles my field of games I can play cheap by getting them used (and I’d already picked up a couple downloadable Xbox 360 games for free that were just sitting in my Microsoft account).

and after that it just got dumb. 

do some hunting. actual refurbished Xbox 360 consoles are like $70; Goodwill often has some for $50, which seems like way too much considering a) I’m not sure those come with power supplies and they definitely don’t come with controllers, and b) if they don’t come with power supplies, there’s no way to know if they work. start stalking Craigslist and Facebook Marketplace.

eventually find somebody on Craigslist selling original Xbox 360, power supply, two controllers, and two games (Madden 09 and some arcade compilation) for $35, which sounds like a very very good deal; don’t want to pull the HDMI cable off my PS3, though, so I order one cheap and wait

bring Madden 09, original Xbox, and probably-busted Gamecube to local game store, where I’m pleasantly surprised to be offered $40 trade-in credit for everything; immediately buy Silent Hill: Homecoming for Xbox 360

HDMI cable arrives. I hook everything up...........and get a Red Ring of Death

hunt around on the internet to see if there’s anything I can try

open Xbox 360, slicing open finger in the process, in hopes that dust inside is the cause of RROD; it’s not

controllers also don’t seem to work. no, wait, one of them does, the one that looks like it might actually be a little corroded? new batteries don’t work but the old ones do even though I’m pretty sure they didn’t the first time I tried?

call around to see what repair prices are like. it’s not great! the whole point was to get this for extremely cheap!

find somebody else on Facebook Marketplace selling another original Xbox 360 and an Xbox 360 E (but no power supply for either) for $40, because apparently her nephew just left them behind when he left the state. I figure okay, I can use the power supply and maybe controllers from Craigslist, and whichever consoles I decide not to keep can at least get me something in trade-in value. plan to meet. get cash and drive all the way over. stop hearing from her. eventually learn her daughter got a bloody nose at the playground and they went home. ask if we can meet again. hear nothing.

she’s available the next day. I say a different day would be better. she’s like okay I’ll just go to the next person then (you know, even though I’d been talking to her and she knew I drove all the way across town once already). I’m like ugh fine if today’s the only day then yeah I’ll drive over again, knowing I might be getting suckered but it does seem like a good price. this time I actually get them.

this Xbox 360 is like...surprisingly beat up, but I hook it up with the power supply from the RROD Xbox 360 and it WORKS. also has Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 3 inside. bonus. 

Xbox 360 E requires a different power cord, and local store has power supplies for $30 or more. I decide I can be patient and go online, where I discover that instead I can order a three-dollar adapter that will let me use the original power supply with it. also order a rechargeable battery pack for the controller, which...works on both controllers, including the one that refused to work with batteries. sure why not.

find wired controller at Goodwill for $8 and buy it, figuring it’s a good deal and it’ll be especially useful if I want to use a controller with my PC. has an old plug that the Xbox won’t take (which is weird, because...I have the oldest version of Xbox 360, and this is an Xbox 360 controller, so what console was this controller designed for?) so I order a USB adapter for a couple bucks. it arrives. wired controller doesn’t turn on. is it the adapter or the controller itself? no idea but my money’s on “I spent eight bucks on a busted controller because I shouldn’t buy shit like that at Goodwill maybe”.

decide I want to try MW3 just to see if I want to play it before trading it in. open optical drive, and it closes itself faster than I expected, so I grab at the tray. it doesn’t like that. will now only make sad noises when I try to open it. I do some reading on how to open stuck Xbox 360 optical drives, watch some videos, spend a considerable amount of time messing with it. nope, it Will Not Open. 

occurs to me that the Xbox 360 E might have something in it as well, since I don’t have a power supply and haven’t been able to turn it on. turns out the Xbox 360 E is actually designed in a reasonable way that lets you easily pop open the tray if it’s stuck. it does have something inside but it’s just a DVD of The Equalizer, boo.

so now I have an original Xbox 360 in great shape except for the RROD, and a beat-up one that is somehow perfectly functional except for the optical drive, and a much less beat-up Xbox 360 E that I’m feeling much friendlier toward but that I can’t use until I get the adapter, so I figure I’ll use that one. it’s newer, it’s obviously better designed, it probably doesn’t have the same problems that gave so many original Xbox 360 consoles the RROD.

the adapter finally arrives. I hook everything up. the Xbox 360 E does not turn on.

no RROD, no nothing, it just sits there. I ask the universe if it’s fucking kidding me but the universe does not reply. 

is it the adapter or the console? I HAVE NO WAY TO KNOW BECAUSE I HAVE NO WAY TO POWER THE CONSOLE. grumpily order an actual Xbox 360 E power supply, finding a third-party one on eBay for $15.

now: waiting for the new power supply but also still stalking Facebook Marketplace and Craigslist, wondering if I should jump on it if I find yet another cheap console that might be better than what I’ve gotten so far or if that’s, you know, the whole “throwing good money after bad” thing.

prediction: once I get the Xbox 360 E power supply, the console still will not turn on, which will leave me with a power supply I will probably want to resell and two original Xbox 360 consoles busted in different ways. I will try to swap the optical drives which, if successful, will leave me with one beat-up but functioning Xbox 360, and two busted consoles that should at least get me some trade-in value. however, given my luck so far, I will be utterly unsurprised if the beat-up but functioning Xbox 360 just fucking dies on me in fairly short order as well.

this also does not include my attempts to get Minecraft for cheap, because one dude on Facebook was going to sell it to me but then he stopped replying, and somebody else wanted me to drive out even further but then she had some kind of emergency so that didn’t work either.

I just. I just wanted to get a cheap Xbox 360 so I could play more games, why did that have to be so complicated

[f4liveblogarchives]

Fantastic Four Vol 1 #117

Thur Jul 25 2019 [07:22 PM] Wack'd: Previously on the Fantastic Four [07:22 PM] Wack'd: Diablo: After 100 years I'm free! Time to conquer Earth! [07:22 PM] Wack'd: Ben: Fuck off *punches him so hard he's trapped again, then drops a castle on him* [07:22 PM] Wack'd: Diablo: After five issues I'm free! Time to conquer Ea--*falls through a frozen lake, presumably drowning* [07:22 PM] Wack'd: Diablo: After a heartfelt engagement and eight issues I'm free! Time to fuck a weddin--*gets fucked up off-panel* [07:23 PM] Bocaj: He also showed up in an Avengers story that was pretty meh [07:23 PM] Wack'd: Good to know [07:23 PM] maxwellelvis: It gave us Hank's new identity as Goliath, though. [07:23 PM] MousaThe14: Diablo, that’s the F4 villain that does magic potions, right [07:23 PM] maxwellelvis: Yeah [07:23 PM] Wack'd: He's an alchemist and also has a dragon robot [07:23 PM] maxwellelvis: He's the guy who turned Ben into a really creepy halfway version of himself [07:24 PM] MousaThe14: It’s been a time since I listened to the Fantasticast so memory isn’t the best [07:24 PM] Wack'd: We now return you to your comic book, already in progress [07:25 PM] Wack'd: Johnny has decided to go to the Inhuman City to recenter himself [07:25 PM] Wack'd: I'm sure everyone will be thrilled to see him [07:25 PM] Wack'd: *cough* [07:25 PM] maxwellelvis: "How's it going douchebag?" [07:26 PM] Bocaj: The most notable thing I think about the Avengers Diablo story is that Diablo tried to create AN ARMY OF DRAGONS MEN and also that Hank studying Dragon Man was the start of his Ultron program which thoroughly shits his life down the shitter [07:26 PM] MousaThe14: Johnny only brings good things with him [07:27 PM] MousaThe14: He’s a dummy [07:28 PM] Wack'd: PREVIOUSLY ON FANTASTIC FOUR [07:28 PM] Wack'd: Crystal: I need to go home, Johnny [07:28 PM] Wack'd: Johnny: No you don't! You're being brainwashed! [07:28 PM] Wack'd: Crystal: No I'm not [07:28 PM] Wack'd: Johnny: I'm gonna fight your family! [07:28 PM] Wack'd: Medusa: Good fuckin' luck! [07:28 PM] Wack'd: Johnny: I'm gonna burn this entire city to the ground! [07:28 PM] Wack'd: Crystal: I'M HERE BECAUSE BLACK BOLT IS DYING [07:28 PM] Wack'd: Johnny: Haha my bad. We cool? [07:28 PM] Wack'd: Crystal: We cool [07:28 PM] MousaThe14: That is so dumb [07:28 PM] maxwellelvis: He threatened to go supernova inside the city. [07:28 PM] Wack'd: I'm...not really exaggerating [07:28 PM] Wack'd: That's basically what happened [07:29 PM] Wack'd: Right down to Johnny making the conscious decision to destroy an inhabited city [07:29 PM] MousaThe14: Comics write high drama back then [07:29 PM] MousaThe14: You know how it is [07:29 PM] MousaThe14: Teen hormones run high [07:29 PM] MousaThe14: Soap opera emotions are intense [07:30 PM] MousaThe14: Sometimes you just gotta blow up a city [07:30 PM] Wack'd: Crystal did an about-face and came back with them [07:30 PM] Wack'd: She later returned to Inhuman City anyway because air pollution was killing her [07:31 PM] MousaThe14: Makes about as much sense as anything, complete with environmental message [07:32 PM] maxwellelvis: Crystal only ever seems to serve on the FF for short periods of time, probably because being the Avatar, Master of the Four Elements makes her a bit hard to write drama around. [07:32 PM] MousaThe14: They never had her be as powerful as she was [07:32 PM] Bocaj: As I said, consequences are for people without superpowers or money [07:32 PM] Bocaj: Which is a superpower [07:32 PM] Wack'd: Yeah they did! A couple of times! [07:33 PM] MousaThe14: Did they? Well that’s good. I guess they didn’t Sue her, huh [07:33 PM] Wack'd: She had the highest kill count when Mad Thinker and Puppet Master sent an army of robots after them for the 100th! [07:33 PM] MousaThe14: I thought they had [07:33 PM] Bocaj: Crystal will fuck you up [07:33 PM] maxwellelvis: Oh, it was the 100th that they had to run that gauntlet? [07:33 PM] Wack'd: She got seven named dudes on top of an entire hoard of robot Atlantans [07:33 PM] Bocaj: Crystal: "I'M THE AVATAR, YOU GOTTA DEAL WITH IT" [07:34 PM] Wack'd: So anyway Johnny arrives and immediately gets shot out of the sky, which as we've established is probably a reasonable and proportionate response [07:34 PM] MousaThe14: Indeed [07:34 PM] Wack'd: But it turns out it's because Maximus has conquered the Inhumans [07:34 PM] Wack'd: Again [07:34 PM] Bocaj: He's always up to that [07:34 PM] maxwellelvis: How typical [07:35 PM] MousaThe14: He has no other powers besides persuasion, right? [07:35 PM] maxwellelvis: Try to blow off steam by crashing at your girlfriend's place and family drama's going on over there, too [07:35 PM] Wack'd: Johnny is unimpressed by this plot twist

[07:36 PM] maxwellelvis: Does Maximus still have his Schmott Guy hat? [07:36 PM] Wack'd: We've yet to find out [07:36 PM] MousaThe14: I mean, how do they allow that to happen [07:36 PM] MousaThe14: I think at this point, the royal family deserve to be conquered [07:37 PM] Wack'd: He typically has an army of loyalists with shitty powers like "being a centaur" who provide armed backup [07:37 PM] Wack'd: But as Johnny quickly proves they're not very impressive [07:37 PM] maxwellelvis: He has a very trustworthy face https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/452938861807403018/604094860819169281/clean.png [07:37 PM] maxwellelvis: They don't even warrant names most of the time. [07:37 PM] MousaThe14: I mean, when you keep getting beaten by 1 dollar store Master, you deserve to stay conquered [07:38 PM] maxwellelvis: https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/452938861807403018/604095064200839170/maximus-is-pleased.png [07:38 PM] Wack'd: So it turns out, Crystal never came back to the Inhuman City

[07:38 PM] maxwellelvis: I'm telling you, it's like looking in a mirror https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/452938861807403018/604095198829477918/gilsnicehat_3200.png [07:38 PM] Wack'd: No one actually knows what happened to her and Lockjaw when they left the Baxter Building for the last time [07:39 PM] Wack'd: So we're probably not actually gonna see Maximus this issue, max, sorry [07:39 PM] maxwellelvis: Alas [07:39 PM] Wack'd: Franklin, Sue, Ben and Alicia, meanwhile, have decided on a relaxing weekend getaway at Agatha's [07:40 PM] MousaThe14: Some say Havok has the worst hat in the Marvel universe [07:40 PM] MousaThe14: And that’s because they haven’t seen this monstrosity [07:41 PM] Wack'd: Reed, Sue, and Franklin play out in the yard, while Ben--reluctantly--hangs out inside so Alicia can feel Agatha's art collection [07:41 PM] maxwellelvis: If there's anything that sums up the Jack Kirby aesthetic of character design in one image, it's Maximus in that armor. [07:42 PM] Wack'd:

[07:42 PM] Bocaj: In fairness to the Inhumans Maximus mostly gets opportunities to keep conquering them because Black Bolt insists on keeping him around because he's his brother. [07:42 PM] Bocaj: Just goes to show loyalty to family is dumb [07:43 PM] MousaThe14: Oh yeah, that’s right, Ben is terrified of the supernatural [07:43 PM] maxwellelvis: Once again, Agatha's place just makes Ben think about his stories [07:43 PM] Wack'd: For the record this is the last issue of 1971 [07:43 PM] Wack'd: And thus probably our last Dark Shadows namedrop for a good long time [07:44 PM] MousaThe14: Man, Agatha’s just got an amazing design. Gotta love a witch with that face. [07:44 PM] MousaThe14: The face of a witch you can trust with your unreasonably powerful toddler [07:45 PM] MousaThe14: I’m not being sarcastic, I think she looks great [07:45 PM] Wack'd: I love Agatha's whole vibe and will be sad when she eventually becomes more of a Avengers/Strange supporting player [07:45 PM] Wack'd: They don't deserve her [07:45 PM] MousaThe14: Awws [07:45 PM] MousaThe14: Too bad [07:45 PM] Bocaj: she's not really an Avengers supporting player [07:45 PM] Bocaj: She hangs around them briefly but only for Wanda [07:45 PM] Wack'd: She has a whole thing with--yeah [07:45 PM] maxwellelvis: She's more of a Scarlet Witch supporting-yeah [07:45 PM] Bocaj: and then fucks off out of the book when she decides Wanda has probably learned enough [07:46 PM] Wack'd: Scarlet Witch doesn't really have her own book enough for the words "Scarlet Witch supporting player" to sound right [07:46 PM] Wack'd: Anyway Johnny pushes himself to the brink of exhaustion getting back to North America so he can ask Agatha to find Crystal [07:47 PM] Wack'd:

[07:48 PM] MousaThe14: So, was Lockjaw a person before the Terrigen Mists or a dog, does anyone know? [07:48 PM] Wack'd: Unfortunately the effort is too much for Agatha and all she can give Johnny is a glimpse [07:49 PM] Wack'd: MEANWHILE... [07:49 PM] Bocaj: A dog [07:50 PM] maxwellelvis: I now associate those sorts of big MEANWHILE...'s with Baywatching, so I'm almost expecting David Hasselhoff to show up cooking some sort of meat. [07:50 PM] Bocaj: There was a time when it was claimed that Lockjaw was an Inhuman person who was turned into a dog shape and made unable to talk by the terrigen mists but it was later later revealed that the Inhumans made up that story to fuck with Quicksilver [07:50 PM] Wack'd: "Meanwhile...  a dog" is accidentally correct [07:50 PM] Wack'd: Crys and Lockjaw ended up on some desolate, decimated world, a bombed-out city somewhere in space [07:52 PM] Wack'd: Turns out Doom banished Diablo here in Marvel Super-Heroes #20 so I'm just gonna...check the wiki real quick [07:52 PM] Wack'd: Okay so Diablo tried to blackmail Doom into a partnership by kidnapping Doom's childhood friend [07:52 PM] Wack'd: Doom retaliated by using the time machine to strand Diablo in a post-apocalyptic future [07:53 PM] Wack'd: Turns out Doom's childhood friend isn't suuuuuper thrilled he grew up to be a supervillain and runs off [07:53 PM] Bocaj: Doom has childhood friends he hasn't flayed into skin armor? [07:53 PM] Wack'd: Did [07:54 PM] Wack'd: Past tense [07:54 PM] Wack'd:

...unbeknownst to her, Doom had made a pact with a cabal of nether demons who offered unimaginable mystic power in exchange for the sacrifice of something of irreplaceable value — and Doom had chosen the life of the only woman who had truly loved him. Valeria was killed as the demonic spell unleashed by Doom consumed her body, her flayed skin becoming Doom's new enchanted armor [x]

[07:54 PM] Bocaj: Eesh [07:54 PM] Wack'd: I am now spoiled on a *Fantastic Four* comic from 2003 [07:55 PM] Bocaj: Wait. He named his godchild after the woman he ritualistically slaughtered to make skin armor? [07:55 PM] Bocaj: SUE DON'T LET DOOM BABYSIT ANYMORE [07:55 PM] Wack'd: Okay in fairness [07:56 PM] Wack'd: Valeria Richards was born 13 issues before Valeria Lastnameunknown got flayed [07:56 PM] Bocaj: Hm [07:56 PM] maxwellelvis: Is that right? [07:57 PM] Wack'd: Yeah [07:57 PM] Bocaj: Anyway sorry for spoiling you on a Fantastic Four comic again [07:57 PM] Wack'd: It's fine [07:57 PM] Wack'd: (Honestly I'm pretty sure I read that one and didn't realize it was the same lady from Marvel Super Heroes #20) [07:58 PM] Wack'd: Man Doom isn't even in this one, we're waaaaaaaay down a rabbit hole here [07:59 PM] Wack'd: So Diablo knocks Crystal and Lockjaw out with ALCHEMY until he can figure out how to make Lockjaw take him home, also presumably with ALECHEMY [08:00 PM] Wack'd: Meanwhile, back at the haunted house, turns out Agatha forgot to turn off the globe [08:00 PM] Wack'd: And it shows Crystal, Diablo, and Lockjaw to Johnny [08:01 PM] Wack'd: Aw jeez Diablo Princess Leiaed her!

[08:03 PM] Wack'd: Now that the three of them are back in the present things are getting positively retrograde up in here

[08:03 PM] Wack'd: I think we can all see where this is going [08:05 PM] Wack'd: So Diablo wants his own country so he can be Doom's equal [08:05 PM] Wack'd: And go kick his ass [08:06 PM] Wack'd: And Crystal makes the perfect fake god on account of the whole "avatar" thing [08:06 PM] Wack'd: This guy is very punchable

[08:07 PM] Wack'd: "Central America! You know, all of it, I guess!"

[08:08 PM] Wack'd: So this is, what, the second consecutive civil war Johnny's refused to get involved in this issue? [08:09 PM] Bocaj: Marvel is very bad at non America [08:10 PM] Wack'd: Yeeeeah [08:10 PM] Wack'd: *sigh* [08:11 PM] Wack'd: I might as well finish this arc so I don't need to look forward to more of this specific racism [08:11 PM] Wack'd: Other racism, maybe [08:11 PM] Wack'd: But not this one

[toomanyfandoms02]

Writing prompts!

So I just reached 100 followers and I am BEYOND happy YALL. So heres 100 prompts for people to send me asks with! Send as many numbers as you want in one and I'll make a blurb from it. (And by blurb I mean I will grow attatched to your request and write a whole fic on it probably lmao) THIS WAS PREVIOUSLY MY 100 FOLLOWER THIBG BUT IM BRINGING PROMPTS BACK FOR REQUESTS.

FYI no matter when you are seeing this, request. I don't care. I'm always up for inspiration. :))))

If it has a star next to it, I came up with it on my own.

These probably wont be blurbs and will be longer!

I'm currently writing for >>>>

Breakfast Club

HARRY POTTER

Spencer Reid / MGG

The Maze Runner

Buzzfeed Unsolved

Spiderman

Barry Allen

Theres a list of who I write best for on my page!! ^^^^

1. "I told you not to read that."

2. "Sir, this is for children only."

3. "Are you kidding me? We're not 'fine'!"

4. "Whatever you're going to ask, the answer is no!"

5. "Hey... what's wrong with your face?"

6. "You look a lot different from your profile picture."

7. "Are you going to keep walking by my house, or are you going to come in?"

8. "Dude, it's three in the morning."

9. "I can't believe I use to think he was attractive."

10. "Actually, you *are* speaking to the manager."

11. "This isn't going to be a typical best man's speech."

12. "According to this, you owe them eighty thousand dollars."

13. "That's the worst reason I've ever heard to have a baby."

14. "I didn't even recognize you!"

15. "You're Satan."

16. "I need a place to stay."

17. "It's six o'clock in the morning, you're not having vodka."

18. "Safety first. What are you? FIVE?"

19. "This is girl talk, so leave."

20. "You're bleeding all over my carpet."

21. "Just smile, I really need to see you smile right now."

22. "Hold still."

23. "You're not interested, are you?"

24. "Oh honey, I'd never be jealous of you."

25. "I'm telling you, I'm haunted."

26. "Touch her again and I'll break your wrist."

27. "Don't look behind you, hurt that guy is checking you out."

28. "I need you to pretend to be my boyfriend."

29. "Quick! Kiss me!"

30. "Just shut up and kiss me."

31. "I hate high school reunions."

32. "I think I picked up your coffee by mistake."

33. "I've never felt this way before... and it scares the shit out of me."

34. "Wait a second, are you jealous?"

35. "This is by far the stupidest plan you've ever had. Of course I'm in."

36. "You never told me you had a fucking twin."

37. "Am I suppose to be scared of you?"

38. "You're hiding something from me."

39. "A wedding?"

40. "Where would someone hide in a town like this?"

41. "H-how long have you been standing there?"

42. "Is this skirt suppose to be this short? I kinda feel like a french whore" *

43. "Oh fuck off."

44. "When did you take that?"

45. "I hid it."

46. "Stop trying to look cool in paparazzi pictures, you look like a dumbass." *

47. "Can you stop laughing?"

48. "You look like a reptile from this angle. Lizard? Snake? Turtle? I just can't decide." *

49. "You have a dirty mind."

50. "You guys are lame."

51. "I don't know. Resurrection maybe?"

52. "This is a safe space." "What the hell are you talking about?" "SAFE SPACE!"

53. "Just stab him."

54. "I'm in dire need of assistance."

55. "I'm gonna die in an elevator full of idiots."

56. "Shoot me."

57. "I feel like you know." *

58. "You're making me dizzy."

59. "I don't want any excuses, they must have the hottest date ever."

60. "Are you with him because it's easy?"

61. "Dibs!" *

62. "If we die, I'm going to kill you."

63. "Do you think you could just go *one* day without pissing me off?"

64. "Your hands are really soft." *

65. "We've become the clingy newlyweds you've always complained about."

66. "Pregnant?"

67. "We are SO much cuter than them."

68. "Wanna go for a drive?"

69. "Is there a reason you're blushing like that?"

70. "Sleep over? Please?"

71. "Are we on a date right now?"

72. "Am I your lockscreen?" "You weren't suppose to see that."

73. "Well I think you're beautiful."

74. "Your feet are so cold!"

75. "You come here often?" "Well I work here, so I'll have to say yes."

76. "You met me yesterday though?" "Yes, and I would die for you in one second. Next question."

77. "I can't stop smiling."

78. "Did you see it?"

79. "Don't leave me alone."

80. "Have you ever kissed anyone before?"

81. "You didn't tell me your friend was cute! Now what am I gonna do?"

82. "How can you drink that stuff?"

83. "Stop apologizing for other people! You aren't the shitty one!"

84. "I just wanna be swept off my feet. Is that so much to ask?"

85. "Oh, my ankle! It must be broken!" *wink wink*

86. "These heels are peeling off my **skin**. But yes, keep complaing about your tie you whine ass." *

87. "I don't want to ruin your party."

88. "Could you just come get me?"

89. "Now I have to start counting all over again!"

90. "Do you talk to your mother with that mouth?"

91. "You are very endearing while you are half-asleep."

92. "But I want to hear you sing!"

93. "No- Mom- don't tell him I said that. Wait!" *

94. "And you wonder why you are still single."

95. "Somebodys cranky." "Somebody needs to shut up."

96. "She's hot. But she's evil."

97. "Pinky promise!"

98. "I'd rather jump out that window. But thanks." *

99. "Hello, sunshine."

100. "I have no idea what you're talking about."

BONUS:

Prompts based on things my best friend has said (changed a little bit for context)

1b. "Man, I hope this ice melts soon."

2b. "Holy SHIT the Disney World parking lot is packed."

3b. "Those tree lights are burning my retinas."

4b. "These are fun to work with." "Not to eat." "No!"

5b. "I mean, I could hit a kid with a car."

6b. "You up? I need to call you! It's not bad it's just kinda funny!"

7b. "Wow I can't imagine being that rich! How old are the kids, maybe I can date one."

8b. "The oldest I would go? 98 I think, for money purposes."

Thank you guys so much. I love you all. SEND ME THOSE ASKS!!!

[snarkystarkybby]

Prompts

Hey all, feel free to request an imagine with either your own imaginative ideas or using one of the prompts from here. 

xo, isabella 

1.     “Ma’am, is this your dog?”

2.    “No, it’s really not that complicated. He’s a bad person.”

3.    “Hey… what’s wrong with your face?”

4.     “Ah yes, come in. Close the door behind you.”

5.    “How could you do this to me?”

6.    “Um, sorry. That one’s not for sale.”

7.    “You’ve got thirty seconds to explain to me what you’re doing here.”

8.    “Ain’t nobody ever told you who your real daddy is?”

9.    “I know this may be hard to believe, but I’m on your side.”

10.“Never heard of that being used as a murder weapon before.”

11.  “Just sit around and cry, then. I don’t have that luxury.”

12.“I’m sorry. I thought you were someone else.”

13.“That’s the nice thing about telling the truth. You don’t have nearly as much to keep track of.”

14.“Of course, we’re best friends. No one else would put up with our shenanigans.”

15.“That’s the least of your worries.”

16.“You look a lot different from your profile picture.”

17.“Do you trust me?”

18.“You found it on the beach? You know, when most people take a walk on the beach, they pick up seashells.”

19. “I haven’t tried this on a human yet, but it should be very similar.”

20.“What? I meant it as a compliment.”

21.“Who put this in my coat pocket?”

22.“I can’t do this anymore.”

23.“I know you did your best, but it just wasn’t enough.”

24.“Even if I could stop it, I wouldn’t.”

25.“You have got to see this.”

26.“Guess who made the evening news?”

27.“I don’t really think of myself as a thief…”

28.“Are you just going to keep walking by my house or are you going to come in?”

29.“We do things a little differently in the 21st century.”

30.“Please return to your assigned seat.”

31.“Dude. It’s 3 in the morning.”

32.“I can’t believe I used to think he was attractive.”

33.“Actually, you are speaking to the manager.”

34.“Where are your clothes?”

35.“I can’t believe I’m telling you this.”

36.“I should have told you this a long time ago.”

37.“I am only telling the truth when I say that you have not behaved completely as a gentleman in this matter.”

38.“I thought we were friends!”

39.“That’s not a good look.”

40.“It’s a genetic trait, but it’s exceptionally rare.”

41.“I love you, but I don’t even think I know who you really are.”

42.“She’s evil, but she does have a point there.”

43.“I didn’t know you could talk.”

44.“Sweetie, what were you thinking?”

45.“What makes you think it was an accident?”

46.“Sorry. You’re the first person I’ve spoken to in ten years.”

47.“I don’t suppose you’ve got a blowtorch around here?”

48.“I know you’re here. You may as well show yourself.”

49.“Get a job!”

50.“This isn’t going to be a typical best man speech.”

51.“According to this, you owe them eighty thousand dollars.”

52.“We thought at first that it was part of the performance.”

53.“It’s been a while since I’ve seen y’all in church.”

54.“I would break his thumbs right now if I could.”

55.“Why are you helping me?”

56.“That’s the worst reason I’ve ever heard to have a baby.”

57.“I didn’t even recognize you!”

58.“I told you not to read that.”

59.“Put the turkey down.”

60.“I didn’t ask to be abducted.”

61.“That’s the most disgusting thing I’ve ever heard.”

62.“Where did you learn how to do that?”

63.“Are you banned from all Taco Bells or just that Taco Bell?”

64.“I thought you had him!”

65.“Humility is not one of my many virtues.”

66.“How can you stand living here?”

67.“She’s young, fertile, and from a good family. What more do you need to know?”

68.“Sometimes being a total geek pays off.”

69.“You don’t have the correct paperwork.”

70.“Careful not to break the—oh.”

71.“I wasn’t going to say anything, but yeah.”

72.“I’d love to help, but I want to keep all of my money in case I want to spend it on other things.”

73.“Well, aren’t you the cutest little thing?”

74.“Why is that your password?”

75.“Please don’t use sarcasm. It confuses me.”

76.“After we lost you, things just weren’t the same.”

77.“If you were logical you would’ve killed me already.”

78.“Well, that could’ve gone better.”

79.“Sometimes I feel like she’s still at my side.”

80.“We’ve been waiting for two hours.”

81.“Your services are no longer required.”

82.“I feel like we’ve met before…”

83.“Does he hit you?”

84.“Yes, it’s a questionable line of work, but I’m good at it.”

85.“She’s in the building.”

86.“Wow! It’s an honour to meet you.”

87.“This used to be a great country, but people like you are destroying it.”

88.“I’m cured. I swear.”

89.“My chances of living to a ripe old age are unfortunately excellent.”

90.“Let’s face it, you don’t exactly blend in.”

91.“Forgive me if I’m misreading things, but do you want to make out?”

92.“The next time you shoot a guy, don’t do it on national television.”

93.“We’ll need to take a blood sample to be sure.”

94.“Sometimes, you just gotta panic.” “No? No, I don’t think that’s helpful actually.”

95.“Sometimes I do stupid things. Sometimes they even work.”

96.My superpowers are my wings. My weakness is salmonella.”

[sonq-minqi]

50 questions tag

tagged by: @whoayoung thanks dude!

1. What takes up too much of your time? drawing

2. What makes your day better?

3. What’s the best thing that happened you today?

4. What fictional place would you like to go? Hmmmm idk

5. Are you good at giving advice? I like giving it but its probably pretty bad

6. Do you have any mental illness? Not that i know of

7. Have you ever experienced sleep paralysis? nope

8. What musician inspired you the most? Mingi because 1: i just wanna draw him all day and 2: honestly falling in love with him so completely during kq fellaz era and seeing him barefaced really made me realize that if i  can think hes a beautiful angel with his acne scars that i can think the same thing about myself and yeah. Self confidence i guess lmao

9. Have you ever fallen in love? Hm maybe lowkey

10. What’s your dream date? If it was first date maybe something like going to a movie or lunch kind of thing. If it was after ive been in the relationship for a while just chilling together and cuddling would be nice lol

11. What do others notice about you? Maybe that i read a lot? That i have no filter? idk

12. What is the annoying habit you have? Picking at the skin on my fingers

13. Do you still talk to your first love? Yeah theyre still one of my best friends

14. How many ex’s do you have? 0

15. How many songs are on your playlist? 375

16. What instruments can you play? I used to do piano

17. Who do you have the most pictures of? Ravi. i used to have 3000+ photos of him save don my phone but now i only have around 1500

18. Where would you like to go before you die? antartica

19. What is your zodiac? aries

20. Do you relate to it? Generally yes

21. What is happiness to you? Not really sure what this question is asking exactly, but for me, what makes me happy is art and when ur chilling with ur friend and they make some innocuous comment and you say something vaguely funny back and they just absolutely piss themselves laughing

22. Are you going through anything right now? Not really

23. What’s the worst decision you’ve ever made? Idk ive made many bad decisions in my life but none so hideous that they immediately stand out

24. What’s your favorite store? The produce store near my house because oreos are 3 dollars and instant noodles are seventy cents

25. What’s your opinion on abortion? Do what you want folks

26. Do you keep a bucket list? nope

27. Do you have a favorite album at the moment? Hmm maybe The Dream Chapter : Star?

28. What do you want for your birthday? My birthday just passed so i know what im getting but a carbon fibre dragon boat paddle!

29. What are most peoples first impressions of you? A lot of my friends say they thought i was kind of intimidating and mean?? Im pretty blunt most of the time so i can kind of see it

30. What age do you seem according to most people? Idk people dont generally comment on my age

31. Where do you keep your phone while you’re sleeping? Under my pillow because i want brain cancer if my tenth grade science teacher has accurate information

32. What word do you say the most? Probably like

33. What’s the oldest age you would date? I dont think i would date someone who’s not the same age at this point tbh

34. What’s the youngest age you would date? ^^

35. What job/career do most people say would suit you? artist

36. What’s your favorite music genre? Ill be honest i still dont know what kinds of music go into which genres

37. If you could live in any country in the world where would it be? If i knew japanese, japan. As it is though, probably amsterdam or the usa

38. What is your current favorite song? Whenever by SBFive

39. How long have you had this blog for? 1 year

40. What are you excited for? To hang out with my friend tmrw

41. Are you a better talker or listener? Talker maybe? Neither is the correct answer probably though

42. What is the last productive thing you did? Working on an art project for school as i type this

43. What do you want for Christmas? Some pants cause i only have one pair that i wear outside the house at this point

44. What class do you get the best grades in? animation

45. On a scale from 1-10, how are you feeling right now? 8 not bad but not awesome

46. What can you see yourself doing in 10 years? No fucking clue

47. When did you get your first heart broken? never

48. At what age do you want to get married? I cant really imagine myself being married tbh

49. What career did you want to have as a child? veterinarian

50. What do you crave now? Some milk but the milk at my house right now is a month old so i m scared to drink it

tagging: @ateezartblog @emotiadouche @softmingis @gothicmingi @hongjooong @sug-er