#Emily burns

[rodder-rodder]

Emily Burns

[magicaplin]

@lgbtqcreators creator bingo: lgbtq+ people in music (3/4)

20 favourite queer musicans (7/20)

Emily Burns - 'Test Drive'

[thisoneloves]

Spotify On Repeat Shuffled Tag

Tagged by @hiriahb to shuffle my Spotify On Repeat playlist and put the first 10 songs that come up! Thanks for tagging me!

(Songs are linked via titles)

1. Rewrite The Stars - James Arthur & Anne-Marie

2. You’re On Your Own, Kid - Taylor Swift

3. Tattoo - Jason Derulo

4. Hits Different - Taylor Swift

5. Tucked - Katy Perry

6. cold/mess - Prateek Kuhad

7. Timeless (Taylor’s Version) (From The Vault) - Taylor Swift

8. Come Back…Be Here (Taylor’s Version) - Taylor Swift

9. Terrified - Emily Burns

10. august - Taylor Swift

Not tagging anyone!

[erabu-san]

Burning going to be my new gender i afraid

+ a doodle i made yesterday before sleeping

[marilynthornhilllover]

I know that you love me, you don't need to remind me,

Emily. P x Jennifer. J x Fem!Reader

Warning: talk of drug consumption, reader is high, mood swings, use of guns (weed) , bad flirting, mommy kink, praise kink, teasing, cringe kiss etc .

A/n: I saw that new jennifer and emily episode where Emily was high and they were so cute! Had to make a fic😌

It was that quite long awaited time of the year where criminal agents are given two weeks off from work. You were beyond exhausted but nevertheless was very happy to finally be able to take off your FBI vest and feeling relieved that you won't have to be picking it up for another week or so.

You soon realized that you literally didn't have plans arranged for the upcoming two weeks ahead, or even tonight. Everyone was pairing up as they packed up their office stuff and headed out. Spencer and Derek laughed and gave eachother a high five as they made their way downstairs to sign out while Emily and jj were already giggling about some random joke as they continued to pack up.

You nervously decided to walk up to them standing in the corridor like a shadow making sure not to seem creepy— but maybe you were doing the opposite. Ever since you joined the team, yes you did make friends but no one ever went the extra mile to offer to hang out with you. Only Emily would now and then eat lunch with you at her desk.

Jennifer wasn't bad either, she did offer to help you with a case file once, you went over to her house which you complimented her for the cozy interior, and yes the boys were also good to you but on a employee holiday like this no one was paying any attention whatsoever to you. They already plans of their own.

You on the other hand, had none, all you were gonna do was shower, eat, sleep and repeat for the next week or so. Nothing productive, not as if you had anything to do either. Prentiss and Mantegna had insisted that someone help you with case files so its not as if you have a major cade to crack over the holiday.

You were as free as a bird and your energetic self needed something to reinforce that energy into. If you could have went on a cruise for two weeks you definitely would have.

Emily scoffed at Jennifer's joke before turning around and spotting you cuddled up in the corner like a little mouse. She tilted her head to the side before approaching you with a warm smile.

" hey hon, you got any plans for the holiday?" She asked chewing a piece of gum that she had been for the entire day — somtimes you wonder if any flavour at all is still existence in it.

" uhh nope, but I'll sure my couch has plans for me though" you said sarcastically and of course she laughed, because Emily laughs at anything and everything which you did find cute. Emily always made sure that she kept everyone at a level where they felt at their absolute best when around her.

She was never mean to anyone really. Always funny, ambitious, smart and talented she was everything. Sometimes her aura was just too high, but she was always still approachable and not prideful.

Emily was like one of those drugs that you couldn't stop using because it feels too good, and when you do take it, it altars with your entire brain function and chemistry.

And speaking of chemistry, that was something you and Emily had alot of. Everytime her eyes made contact with yours, you felt as if your body was thrown into the deepest pits of hell. You'd get shivers everytime she passed you or called you a pet name. You'd go completely weak in your knees when she made the littlest amount of psychical contact with your skin — it was absolutely ridiculous just how easily she could get under your skin.

Or the time when you were making coffee in the kitchen and she needed to grab something from the top shelf and she moved you by putting her hands on your hips, with her chest pressed so closely against your back with face by your neck.

Emily made you question things. You knew you always had a thing for older women, always, since highschool and it never seemed to go away. And Emily was exactly your type, you just weren't sure if she felt the same way in return and you didn't wanna ruin the amazing friendship you both had by letting your stupid emotions and hormones get the best of yourself.

" well I'm sure you'll find something to entertain yourself, JJ and I are hooking up at her place tonight for snacks and a movie" she placed hands on her hips are she turned to look at jj who was texting away on her phone before turning back to you. You gaved her a akward smile, before a breathy nervous laugh escaped your mouth.

" hooking up huh" you saw as her eye brows quirked before a sly smile came into evidence on her face and quickly glanced at Jennifer who was now angrily texting before taking a step closer towards you, closing the the last gap space that was there. Her body heat and perfume over took your senses making your breath hitch.

You pressed your palm against her chest sneaking a quick glance at jj and the camera above. Emily was looking at you with a teasing smirk, she leaned down besides your ear and whispered.

" do wanna hook up with me as well?" She pulled back to see the reaction on your face and just as she imagined it was absolutely priceless. She chuckled before pulling away completely.

" oh my God emily would you leave poor y/n alone, let's go already" Jennifer said with a tint of exhaustion and annoyance her voice. Emily chuckled before gently caressing your cheek. The both women waved you goodbye before departing and going their way.

You sighed before picking up your bag and leaving, you locked your office door and went home. You did decided to walk with a few case files home and evidence objects to keep yourself busy during the holiday to stop yourself from going insane from the intense boredom you were prone to have.

— — — —

Emily and Jennifer had just sat down and were about to enjoy their late afternoon with wine and salt and vinegar chips when a continuation of loud knocking could be heard on jj's front door. Both women looked at eachother with utter confusion on their faces — the weren't expecting anyone. Jennifer decided to get up and go check the door, Emily following closely behind with her hand placed tightly on her gun.

The door bell soon started ringing along with the knocks which triggered Jennifer even more. Unlocking the door Jennifer threw it open, not caring what stood on the opposite side of it, after all emily was ready to protect her best friend at all cost, even if it meant shooting someone in their foor.

" if I had my way I swear I would—" as soon as she saw you she stopped talking, her eye brows quirked as she squinted her eyes to make a better appearance of your face in the dim moon light. Emily let out a soft sigh when she saw you but quickly went back into a state of worry at the same time.

Now you had both women wondering what you were doing at their house.

" y/n? I didn't know you were coming over, did Emily invite you?" Jennifer turned around hoping to get a confirmation nod from Emily but she shook her head and pursed her lips, letting her know she was just as confused as her.

" Well aren't you guys a bit rude, aren't you gonna invite me in?" You muttered but before they could react you let yourself in. You carefully walked down the long fancy corridor switching off some lights on your way because they made your eyes burn, making your way to the living room area, having knowing your way around jj's house since the last two times you were there.

You stumbled over the coffee table and landed right onto the sofa, face first with a soft groan. You dropped the ziplock bag of cheese puffs you had brought onto the floor.

She walked up to you and you and sat beside you on the couch, she picked you up by both your forearms and made you look at her.

Both women side eyed eachother, both in desperate need to know what on God's green earth was going on. Jennifer leaned against the wall to further scrutinize you. Emily on the other hand was just worried how you got here on your own with no car or phone.

" hey y/n sweetie are you..... drunk?" Her voice sounded like when water got into a phone speaker and you tried to play a song— you couldn't understand it. You rubbed your eyes and glanced at the table to which your face instantly lit up when you saw the salt and vinegar lays chips.

You grabbed them ferociously then took out some chopsticks you had stuffed in the back pocket of your jeans and started eating the chips. At this point both women were flabbergasted, mouths open, jaws dropped. Jennifer took a deep breath before she turned around and went to her fridge to grab you a drink to help you sober up because it was crystal clear that you were beyond drunk, drunk was an understatement.

" what time is it?" You suddenly asked putting the chips down and dusting off your hands.

" time for some hydration, here you go" Jennifer said as she passed you a bottle of cold cranberry juice. Once again your face lit up like a child on Christmas day.

" ohhhh, it's got what plants crave!" You exclaimed. The look on Jennifer's face when you said that was priceless as Emily silently continued to look at you with a completely blanket stare.

You placed the bottle of juice at the side of your head as if it was an ice pack and burped. You cleared your throat before speaking up again.

" have you guys seen that movie! Idiot city!.... wait city Idiot... wait... yeah" it's like your body was replaced with a child's and this called for huge concern. Emily sighed heavily and took the bottle from your hand.

" Idiocracy?" Jennifer whispered and you nodded.

" I knew I liked you! Ohhh, I and on my way here I saw a cat jumping off your house roof then it turned into a dog and flew away as a mosquito" you said before the loudest laugh took you over that you almost started crying.

Emily whispered " oh good lord" before she shook her head, Jennifer was still completely and totally lost for words. Jennifer had a feeling that being drunk would not cause someone to behave like this— well of course she knew, she's a profiler. She had a feeling you were high, but she didn't want you to act out and she would need proof for Emily because knowing her she wouldn't believe for a minute you would do drugs.

" umm y/n what's in the bag?" Jennifer asked and your eyebrows quirked, you placed your finger at you ear urging her to repeat even though she was so damn close to you.

" What's in the bag" she repeated as she dragged her words this time. You shrugged.

" I don't know what time the supermarket closes" emily stood up and walked towards to kitchen to grab her phone, you had the agent stressed. Jennifer just took it upon herself to grab the bag of " cheese puffs" before she walked towards emily.

" look I know you may not believe but I have a pretty good feeling that, that girl right there is literally the profound definition of what we call high" emily scoffed.

" Oh come on, she probably had too much wine I mean weren't we just about to drink wine as well?" She restated trying to convince Jennifer, but honestly to this rate she just couldn't, Jennifer was already convinced from her own opinion.

" emily elizabeth prentiss which wine do you know makes someone this drunk?" Jennifer asked, emphasizing on the last two words of her sentence. Emily shrugged before looking back at you, who was now sniffing the air every two seconds like a curious dog. Jennifer rolled her eyes before opening the bag of cheese puffs and taking a sniff.

She gaged before pulling away quickly.

" this smells like straight up weed!" She swiftly turned to let Emily have a sniff, to which Emily pulled away as well. Jennifer closed the bag and turned it around where there was writing in black. " DO NOT OPEN, CONTAINS CASE 101 EVIDENCE".

" you ate the case evidence! Oh my god!" Jennifer looked like she was going to erupt like a volcano and her high pitched tone of voice was making your head hurt and ears ring.

" I was hungry, and I didn't know that they were edibles" you whispered as you squinted your eyes since it was getting harder to see. Jennifer looked at you in disbelief as she turned to Emily for back up. Before Emily could utter a word Jennifer was already furious.

" Emily, don't even! She basically ate the entire bag!" She shouted. She saided pacing the room with her fingers gently massaging her temple to calm her.

" what are we gonna tell hotch, or even worst David" Jennifer covered her face with her both her hands before leaning over the kitchen counter.

" Well I mean, she probably just ate the backup stash, it should be fine, we should really be worrying about is her health" emily muttered scratching her head. Jennifer looked up at emily as her jaw dropped.

" your defending her?!" Emily raised her hands in defense but before she could reply Jennifer took the chance.

" I seriously cannot believe you right now!" Jennifer once again, started pacing the room, this time even more quicker.

" Oh come on jj, what are the odds that people make silly mistakes like these?" Jennifer stopped, and looked at emily with wide eyes.

" Well with the odds as high as her I'd say zero!" She said angrily before picking up her phone.

Emily sighed before looking over at you who was now eating the chips and gnawing your teeth wildly making crumbs fall all over the place. In a way Emily felt bad for you, mostly pity because she knew what you did was down right stupid but Jennifer was being a tadbit too harsh on you in your current position — knowing you couldn't properly comprehend the situation or what was going on.

" ok I'll take her home and we can speak to the team about this tomorrow when y/n is a better state of mind, ok?" Emily said in a reassuring voice. Jennifer sighed in frustration before biting her lip and nodding approvingly.

Emily carefully picked you up off the couch and wrapped her arm around your waist as she insisted to take you home safely. Her body warmth was comforting and her perfume was like a lullaby putting you to sleep this time. You melted in her embrace as she took you outside.

Your vision was blurred and the cold air on your skin — although you had a jacket on, was making you shiver. Seeing this emily hugged you tighter. She opened the door to her wagon and assisted you into the passenger seat and putting on your seat belt for you. You looked at her, she looked like one of those ancient paintings,the ones you can't withdraw your eyes from, the Renaissance ones.

You weren't sure if maybe it was the drugs or the hormones that came after taking the drugs but you felt the need to kiss emily, your eyes flicked down to her lips that were slightly parted as she concentrated on getting the seatbelt to adjust to your liking. Her smooth skin and wrinkled lines that ran across her forehead and eye line area, her little cute eye bags from all the hard work she does.

You couldn't resist the urge, she was a drug, she was your drug. You licked your lips and leaned in. Your lips connected with hers in a slow soft kiss. You closed your eyes and allowed yourself to enjoy the moment. Emily didn't pull away, she was surprised yes, but she didn't pull away. Emily couldn't cover up the feeling she felt for you but she also didn't want to take advantage of your drunken state.

Taking it that she was enjoying it as much as you, you tried to force your tongue into her mouth but that's when she pulled away. Your brows furrowed and for a moment the drugs may have returned your common sense and you realized what you did — what you were trying to do. And soon the embarrassment and cringe settled in.

" sorry, oh God I'm so stupid!" You whispered as you fought back tears, you covered your face with both hands and started sobbing. Emily sprinted around to the drivers seat to comfort you. She gently peeled your hands away from your face, holding your palms in hers she caressed them with her knuckles softly. You sniffed and shook your head in denial before looking out the window.

" hey, sweetheart look at me please" her voice was as soft as an angel and so gentle as if you were something valuable that could be broken, that's something you loved about emily, she was so comforting in all circumstances, no matter what. She placed her hand under your jaw and turned you to look at her. She stared at you with her cute Bambi eyes so filled of love, and she so badly wanted to say " I love you" but she knew you wouldn't be able to comprehend them.

" look y/n, i wanna— kiss you back but I can't. That doesn't mean I don't want to, I just want you to be able to give me your full sober concent." She spoke as slowly and clearly as possible so you won't misinterpret anything.

" and your not stupid, we all make mistakes my love. Once I accidentally— well I got drunk the morning of my Law exams and failed them, and that did set me at a disadvantage for my career but I still made it into this job" she continued to rub your knuckles and wip every tear that fell from your eyes.

" and this joke takes y/n, but it also gives.... it gave—" she took a deep breath before exhaling heavily. " it gave me you." Hearing these words made your heart flutter souly. Your little smile came across your face which emily mirrored.

" now, my sweet girl, my I take you home?" She spoke in a old French accent waving her hand a fancy motion, You both laughed until you were out of air. after the laughter died down She chuckled and placed a hand on your thigh squeezing the tender flesh which made your breath hitch.

The drive home was long but certainly not quiet at all, you and Emily blasted high 2000s music all the way until she arrived at your home. You knew there was gonna be alot to discuss the next day but you should be fine once you have emily by your side.

[itsraining-honey]

something tells me that burning spice was the one attacking her instead of just “regular cookies who wanted to attack her randomly one day because there were treasures in her cocoon.” they’re possible followers of burning spice? or little manifestations that he possibly made.

[shiftywing]

[isagrimorie]

I love how Criminal Minds 5x11 - Retaliation is a very Emily Prentiss episode. And more hints about Emily's past and her previous training, the ability to continue on and be alert.

The car she's in gets hit by a truck, and she keeps on trucking along. She empties her clip but is also cognizant enough to memorize partial plate numbers:

(Wow a night scene, look at that, I can see during a night scene, Criminal Minds Evolution!)

Emily's trained to go on (and honestly, also her dogged stubbornness just doesn't keep her down) despite serious injury.

Emily's so confused when Derek tells her she emptied her clip shooting at the truck.

Right up to the personality of people who would and could do undercover work:

Speaking from experience there, Special Agent Emily Prentiss?

And then, Reid unknowingly hits on the head Emily's ongoing existential crisis anytime a case hits too close to home.

But also, how, honestly Emily has it in her to just really murder a man.

As the criminal of the week, Schrader observed Emily has the look in her eyes that said she would and could kill him given the chance.

Schrader killed the cop who was in the car with Emily. Schrader taunted her about killing the man right next to her.

Schrader either thought he could psych out Emily from killing him or was desperate enough to just pull a suicide by cop.

Schrader taunts Derek about his arm injury and moves his gun an inch away from Joe Muller's head to shoot Derek instead.

And that minute movement was enough for Emily:

(Derek shooting at Schrader though was both overkill and risky since he could've shot Muller instead, thankfully that doesn't happen).

I’m so curious what Emily’s been through during her taskforce days that Emily is… comfortable is not exactly the word but unfazed killing?

What has Emily seen that makes some of the horrific scenes just roll off her back.

Also the very few anecdotes she shares are kind of harrowing in themselves:

Like, how years later Emily shares with Tara Lewis that in her JTF-12 days, she was on a mission where there were troops who would leave playing cards on dead terrorists, declaring 'We did this'.

What has Emily had to do that 'good guys doing bad things' has really screwed her up bad?

That after everything she just wanted a job that was “clean”. Clear right and clear wrongs.

I do think as hard it is as a fan to accept— Emily did need the time away from the BAU to reconcile a few things about herself.

Accept some of the things she learned about herself as a spy and realize… all the morally ambiguous things she can live with to a point. There are still lines she won’t cross.

Also, because spy stuff -- and Burn Notice kind of gave the (fictional, maybe?) guidelines to a great undercover agent:

Michael Westen: "When you're claiming to be somebody you're not, the key is commitment. You've got to sell it like your life depends on it. Because sometimes it does."

Michael Westen: "Inexperienced operatives abandon a cover ID under pressure. Experienced ones just play their roles harder."

---

I can only imagine that Emily Prentiss played by the same rules as Michael Westen.

/edited

[marvelwitchergilmore]

In A While...

Summary: Spencer Reid x Fe!Reader -> You were first introduced to Spencer through Emily, however, six years later, it seems some things are beginning to change.

Disclaimer: This is part one. A lot of pining, fluff and a little angst to come. Part two here. Not proof read.

Before…

“Who is that?”

“Who’s who? Oh.”

“Baby girl, do you know-”

“No, but, oh. She’s cute. Hey, do you think-”

“Hey, guys. What’s going on?”

“You know her?”

Emily’s face lit up. “Actually, I do.”

Emily had called out your name, and when you looked up, you’d gone from looking a little lost and a little intimidated to bright and confident. 

“Emily.”

Emily hugged you tightly and began asking questions about your journey to the office when more people gathered around her, leaving you to assume they were her teammates she always talked about. 

“Oh, right. Yes, this is Derek Morgan, Penelope Garcia, JJ you’ve met, and…where’s Reid?”

“I’m here.”

That was the very first day you met him. 

From behind Morgan, Reid stopped in his tracks and was introduced to you. The little sister of one of Emily’s friends. You’d applied for a small internship role at the Bureau. But once Emily caught wind of your name going through the servers, she asked Hotch if you could be placed with them. 

It would only be for two weeks and you had enough experience already with research which allowed you to help consult on cases with Garcia by your side. 

Once Hotch had finally made his introductions, you were thrown into the deep end. 

And, for the most part, it was smooth sailing. 

Your small background in linguistics helped on a case in Georgia, you’d made fast friends with Penelope who, within the first half an hour of meeting you, wanted to adopt you. And the team really seemed to like you, and best of all, you liked them. 

You also, despite your forced effort to shut it down, began to develop a small crush on one Doctor Spencer Reid. 

Granted, it didn’t go anywhere. After all, it was just a small crush. But it was nice to have his friendship. 

He was only three years older than you, so it made things easier. 

Everyone else, like Emily, was close to being ten years older than you, save for JJ and Spencer. 

“So, how do you know Emily?”

“She’s my sister’s best friend,” you replied. “They were in the same year at College. I was just the little sister, but they made me feel welcome. Less shut out despite the age gap.”

“Is that how you found this job?” Penelope asked you. 

“Sorta. It wasn’t nepotism or anything like that,” you quickly jumped to explain. “I- there was a posting for applicants. Emily didn’t even know until she called me up and asked me because she saw my name go through one of the servers. She knew before I did that I had been accepted but, instead of catching a train into DC every day, she helped me find a posting here.”

“Well, I’m glad. We need more girls around here.”

You smiled at Penelope’s comment, soaking in the moment before a call came through from Hotch. 

After the two weeks had finished, you returned back to College, but not before you had one final drink with the team. However, research for your Master’s still called. 

“No, no, no, please, please stay.”

“I can’t,” you smiled as Emily tried to drag you closer to the bar. 

“I will call you in the morning, but right now I need to finish up some research.”

Emily groaned. “Fine, but let me go with you.”

“No, Em, you’re having fun.”

“I can’t let you go alone.”

“I can go with her.”

From behind you, Spencer appeared. 

“No, it’s-”

“Please, it’s my pleasure.”

Emily smiled when you looked back at her. “Thank you, Reid.”

Spencer just smiled. 

Emily hugged you, but you were the last to let go. “Have fun.”

“Not a word.” you told her. 

“About what?” she pretended. 

That night, Spencer walked you home. And you both just talked. About anything and everything. He rattled off statistics about the amount of people that walk home, vs drive and catch the train. He asked you about your Masters and you told him. He even gave you some book recommendations which you checked out from the library the very next day. And you asked him about the love for his job which, by the time you reached your apartment, he told you;

“You should apply.”

“For what?”

“To be an Agent. I think you’d be really good.”

“What makes you say that?”

“Aside from your resume?” Spencer thought for a moment. “It just…seems to suit you.”

For the rest of the night, you tried to imagine your life from the past two weeks, being the rest of it. 

And it didn’t seem all that bad of an idea. 

Six years later…

You’d been, officially, SA Dr. Y/n Y/l/n of the BAU for four months. Before that, you had worked within the State Department for three years since your knowledge in languages was helpful for their investigations, and before that, you were placed from post to post, helping agents with their cases, mostly in and around the East Coast. 

And the minute you walked into the building, it oddly felt like coming home. 

You’d lived in Virginia most of your life, but working with the BAU…felt like home. 

This was also helped by the fact that Emily had decided to come to town for a visit, even if it wasn’t for long. 

“Oh my god, Emily, Hi.”

“Penelope,” Emily smiled before hugging her. 

“I really am really happy to see you but right now…”

“We’ve got a case?” you asked. 

“Big one.”

“I guess I’ll catch you later, then?” Emily asked. 

“Or you could consult?”

As if appearing out of thin air, you all turned to find Hotch stood behind her. 

“We’re always welcome to have you on the team, Emily. Even if it’s just as a consultant.”

Penelope had a badge for her by the time you’d all made it into the briefing room. 

“Here you go.”

“Thank you.” Emily replied before pinning it to her shirt. 

“We have a case…”

Penelope went on to explain the case and within twenty minutes, the wheels were up. You had taken your seat next to Rossi, and across from Spencer. And even though she was paying attention to the case, Emily couldn’t help but notice the small look in Spencer’s eyes every time you looked at each other. 

She also knew that look meant more than what Spencer’s brain was willing to admit. 

And it only continued to happen. 

Three days later, Emily watched yourself and Spencer dance around each other, like you knew each other’s every move. 

You both stood in front of the evidence board, moving things around as you talked about the case, working out the geo-file. And every time you stood back, Emily could have sworn she saw Spencer’s eyes glow when looking at you. She also didn’t fail to notice the double glances you passed each other, just a few seconds away from catching each other in the act.

Emily had always known you had a small crush on Spencer. Even from the first day you met. The fact you could barely look at him for the first four days was her biggest sign. But when she’d asked JJ about you two when you’d officially joined the team, it seemed like…nothing. 

You’d both just become…friends. 

Nothing more. 

But Emily couldn’t be the only one to see it. 

So when Derek snuck up on her as she watched the both of you, it gave her some confirmation to her doubts that ‘friendship’ was all that was between yourself and Spencer. 

“They’ve practically been glued at the hip.”

“Clearly.” Emily stated. “They seem to be in sync with one another.”

“Been like that since her first day.” Derek explained. “Now they don’t even have to talk. They just…know.”

“And nothing ever…”

“No.”

“Hey, guys?” Spencer called out. “We might have something.”

You went on to explain what you had found with Spencer’s help. 

However, by the end of the case, Emily finally got the answer she was looking for. 

Spencer trailed your every move with his eyes as you unbuckled your belt, stood and grabbed a snack and drink for yourself and JJ. 

“Hey, Reid?”

He snapped his attention to Emily who was sitting across from him. 

“If you want to ask her, she might just say yes.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” And he turned back to his book. 

“Hey, Spencer?” Emily placed a finger on the top of his book and pushed it down. “Talk to me. What’s going on?”

“I don’t know.”

Emily waited for him to continue. 

“I…I know that we’re friends but recently I’ve just felt…different. And I can’t even remember when it started. All I know is one day we’re walking back from a coffee shop, and the next…”

“You can’t take your eyes off of her?”

Spencer felt slightly embarrassed, but nodded all the same.

“I know something has changed, but I don’t know when or even how. But I know it’s changed and…it’s different, and I don’t hate it, but I also can’t seem to make sense of it.”

“Do you think she feels the same way?”

That was a question Spencer had been asking himself for weeks. “I don’t know.”

“Have you thought of asking her?”

“What if she says no? I like her but…”

“You don’t want to lose her.”

Spencer shook his head. And then his eyes found you again as you walked back to JJ and handed her her drink and bag of chips before sitting down beside her with your own. 

He’d lived his entire adult life as an FBI agent and somehow the prospect of his feelings for you and the potential chance of losing you was the scariest thing he’d ever witnessed.

[melanodis]

sorry I needed to post this immediately

[dovewingkinnie]

no context charlie image from an au

[starlightdreaming]

Lucifer Morningstar x Reader! Ch. 3!

Fandom: Hazbin Hotel!

Content Warning: more… angst. with some comfort..(?) idk starve lol. blood and vulgar words. SUPER LONG CHAPTER TOO WOO! (nonproof read too)

Synopsis: after going through severe depression, you mentally and physically shut down.

Further note: THANK YOU FOR THE PEOPLE WHO ARE SUPPORTING MY SERIES (Lululuna) IT MAKES ME SO FUCKIGN HAPPY AAHAHAHHDVENE (this is also my favorite chapter I’ve been waiting to write HEHEHHE) ENJOY READING AS IVE ENJOYED WRITING IT - ✨Lolo💫

Chapters!: Chapter 1 ✧ Chapter 2 ✧ Chapter 3 (you are here) •<•)b ✧ Chapter 4 ✧ Chapter 5

THIS CHAPTERS SONG IS uhhHhahwueh

(optional but recommended!)

｡･:*:･ﾟLululuna･ﾟ:｡*:･｡

After sending Lucifer away, you were silent during the whole aftermath ordeal.

You stared at the ground for a long while, sitting in the middle of the court room, ignoring and blocking everyone that was talking or looking at you. In a room so loud, in your mind, it was deathly silent.

Sera went to you, tapping your shoulder softly, “come along now, Y/n,” She says, softly, “Let’s get you home, alright?” She offers, standing up, waiting for you to collect yourself and get up as well.

the carpet was drenched with a puddle of tears, you felt like a part of you was gone forever… and you weren’t ever going to get it back. You dry your tears, using your sleeves to wipe them off your face before getting up and taking Sera’s hand into your own, she held your hand softly, teleporting you to the front of your home.

“Take all the time you need.” Sera says, understanding how much pain you were going through, you have told her everything after all in your years of working with her after you and Lucifer fell apart. She teleported away as you stood at your front door for a moment, staring at the door before unlocking it and pushing it open with no effort at all, your home was dark from how late it was,

The sun was gone, put away to rest, and the moon was present, subtle and set.

You walked into your home, stars barely dimming any light in the dark home, you closed your door behind you, leaning on it with a sigh, your exhausted eyes felt puffy from all the tears you had shed after seeing Lucifer for the last time, the way he looked at you as he fell, bore into your mind, it’s been haunting you since.

‘maybe it was a mistake?’ you thought as you conversed in your head for the nth time that day, your mind was haunting you endlessly with years of torment after Lucifer left you behind, your heart and mind were always arguing with one another, your heart always begged to talk things out even if the pain was unbearable but your mind was more of in control with your body, trying to keep your heart safe, trying to keep you safe from any more suffering. you just didn’t know what to do.

Tears fell from your eyes again that night, wishing to be held and comforted by someone who would understand the same pains as you, and that someone was no one.

Down at your door you sat, hugging your knees as you cried out your pain, the exact same spot when you cried yourself to sleep on your last birthday, the last birthday you shared with Lucifer. It wasn’t a good memory to remember but… it was a memory that was telling you, ‘here we are, once again.’ and that was enough to make you cry harder as you hugged yourself with the silence screams that no one could ever see or hear…once.. again.

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Day in, day out.

As time passed, you were slowly recovering from the losses of your childhood friend.

Day in, day out.

As time passed, you focused on your work behind the scenes, Emily bringing joy to those around Halo city, welcoming winners and Heaven born angels all around. With more Earth born angels arriving in Heaven, the population of the people grew, meaning more expansions of the city and more expansions of the city, meant you had to work much, much longer.

Day in, day out.

You were falling behind on your creations, being the only ‘angel’ that could make stars, Sera would often have to come and talk to you and your issues of the star makings. You and Sera both tried to get other angels to make the same stars as you, sentient and beautiful, but it was only ever botched and dull when anyone else tried to make them, leaving you at a loss. You often had to stay up in late night hours, until the sun came back up, barely ever giving you the chance to go back home and rest. After one problem, another came along, you began to feel confined behind those four walls.

Day in, day out.

Your life was just stuck in the same room, rarely ever getting out, star after star, it began to be repetitive and passionless, everything was the same.

Day in, day out.

Sera would often visit you, telling you to keep making an nth amount of stars today or tomorrow, sooner or later, she would just leave notes and piles of paperwork her employers would send to you, leaving you in the dust, life became frail and dulling, you were just a machine at that point, neglected and forgotten as you kept making sentient stars constantly.

Day in, day out.

Nothing’s new. Days, weeks, months, years, nothing was changing as you drowned more in more into a bleak and miserable office, you felt more and more empty, you would wake up and sleep, you lost track of time at this point, your office was just a mess of star dust and stars, the windows were black from the dust staining the windows making them unobtrusive, you sat on the floor in the center, feeling stuck and hopeless. Surrounded by the only thing that brought you comfort, now becoming the only thing you were ever useful for.

Day in, day out.

How long has passed? You didn’t care anymore. All you wanted was to escape and be free from this basked room of misery and self loathing, your stars became gloopy and sticky, they were melting in this room like you were.

Day in, day out.

You couldn’t bare another minute in the same room, your arms were stained black from stars that melted on you from time to time, the stars were barely ever successfully made anymore, you just couldn’t continue anymore.

Day in, day out.

Long and forgotten you were, nothing new and changing, just you in a black room, full of dust and gloopy stars. You laid there meaninglessly, your eyes lifeless and you completely numb, tired and exhausted.

Day in, day out.

Nothing’s new, nothing’s new, nothing’s new, nothing’s new, nothing’s new, nothing’s new, nothing’s new, nothing’s new, nothing’s new, nothing’s new, nothing’s new, nothing’s new, nothing’s new, nothing’s new.

Day in, day out.

After days of laying there, eating your own stars as survival, refusing to allow anyone into your room, Sera finally showed up for once after eons or centuries? you don’t even know anymore. She wasn’t as loving or caring as she used to be, it was to be expected since you lost sight of you as a sister and more of a machine. When she ordered you to get up and do something, you refused to respond as you continued to lay there, seeing as doing anything anymore was futile.

She commanded you again and she received no result, When she picked you up from the ground, she saw how lifeless you really were, she teleported you to a hospital, getting you attention from the doctors as quick as possible, they checked you, you were alive, obviously, but mentally, you died out long ago.

✧•✧•✧•✧•✧•✧•✧

✧•✧•✧•✧•✧•✧•✧

The nurses cleaned and fed you, you were barely responsive but it was progress to them if you ever reacted.

You laid in that hospital bed, day in, day out.

One day, Emily came to visit you, you didn’t bother until she used her powers on you. As the joy bringer of the people, she managed to give you a glimpse of happiness again and that was enough to bring color back into your eyes and look at her.

A nurse watching, left to contact a doctor. Emily smiled at you as she channeled her energy to you, hugging you and asking you questions to see if you would respond, it took awhile but you managed to wry a smile and tell her, “hi..” a croak in your voice from how raspy your throat felt, she tilted her head with a comforting smile, “hi,” she said, “how are you feeling?” she asks genuinely, her hand over your yours as she channeled more of her angelic energy, soothing you physically and mentally, “I’m alright.” you responded with a croaky voice, “yeah?” she asks, “yeah.” you respond.

A doctor showed up to give you a thorough check up, the nurse following and thanking Emily as she lightly laughed off the nurses praises. Your eyes were still dull but they had color now, the bags under your eyes were visible from the years lack of resting, black circles covered your eyes but seeing you be able to smile was just enough for the doctor to say you were responsive now. The doctor and nurse left the room to get you your meal or checking on other patients, leaving you and Emily once again.

Emily would talk to you, making small conversations, tell you about her day and sharing her energy with you again to make you more at ease, she even told you how Sera refused to let her see you cause you were always too busy for visitors, that was true but it was also the reason you were here in the first place. When visiting time was over she promised to come back to visit you tomorrow, you smiled at that, waving bye as she left.

Now it was you, yourself, and the white room and for once, you decided to stand up and look outside the window, the stars shined and dimmed brightly that night, the stars were the only thing making your eyes shine that night, their light reflecting off your eyes irises.

with the day done and in, you rested peacefully in that hospital bed, letting the day out.

Emily visited everyday to see you, still seeing you as a sister and telling you her life stories, she even managed to make you laugh at one point, it was a big laugh but it was genuine and thats what matters to her. At one point, you managed to ramble off about stars and the ideas you had for them, you got to show her how you made them, you tried to show her as well when she requested to guide her to make one, obviously it didn’t work but she smiled whenever she got to be given the chance to, she gave you the botched star that was lavender blue, it was small with imperfections but for the first time in the longest time, someone had given you something and you never were letting it go.

You used a little bit of your stardust to make it stick in your hair, making sure it stays there, no matter what. Emily smiled when she saw it in your hair, seeing how much it matters to you. You and Emily both spent the entire day talking and creating, sharing and conversing, it was so comforting and warm, her light was guiding you out of that dark abyss you had made for yourself and eventually- you were out the hospital.

You went back to that same office room but this time, you cleaned it, you made more stars, the neglected ones being perfected and revived, sentient and chiming. With your office cleaned you decided to get a meeting with Sera personally. It took a few days but it was accepted and eventually you were in her office, she looked at you authoritatively, not seeing you as she had once, who knows long ago.

“What is it, Y/n?” She says, sitting at her desk as you walked up to her desk and took a seat in the chair at the opposite end. “I quit.” You spoke, unhesitant, “What?” She says, rather surprised, “I quit,” you smiled, crossing your arms, “at making stars for you and the people.” you finished, watching her reaction change, “and what makes you think you can?” She says with a slightly aggressive tone, glaring at you slightly, “I am my own person, I want a new job,” You say, sitting back in your chair, “then- will I make more stars for you.” You say, your her fingers intertwined and resting on your lap, legs crossed.

She stood up, her figure towering over you from over the table, “You refused to continue your work, end up in a hospital for who knows what and now you’re asking for a new job?” She asked, feeling rather insulted like you can laze around and do whatever you want, “Yes, that’s exactly what.” You smiled, unbothered, Emily made you feel this way, like a new person, she was therapy itself in a way.

“And you think you can handle a different job? even when you couldn’t even handle your own?” She glares, you leaned forward into your chair, “got bored with the stars thing, without a doubt I can do something else.” You say looking at her smugly, making her harden her glare at you. maybe Emily gave you too much of her energy.

“Fine then.” She says, turning around, looking away from you and out the window, she snapped her fingers and a man appeared next to you, “Woah- wait, what the fuck?” He says, looking around the room, looking at Sera, then at you, “You will be working with Adam from now on,” She says, turning back to you, you and Adam staring at each other awkwardly, before he began to wiggle his eyebrows at you with a flirty smirk, “Adam, you are to train and teach Y/n, show and tell her what she will be doing.” Sera orders, you had your knees up in the chair leaning away from Adam, due to him gawking at you before he looked away to Sera, “Wait now? Don’t you think it’s too soon for any recruits?” He questions, pointing a thumb at you.

“She wanted a new job since she failed to do her own,” Sera explains to Adam as you rolled your eyes from her statement, “since she says she can handle a new one, I’m giving her this one.” Sera finishes, sitting down back in her chair, “But we were just about to start? she wont even have time to prepare?” Adam responds, scratching his horn confused from this sudden meeting, “Then I suggest you get started,” Sera commands, going back to skimming through papers, “Dismissed.” She says, as you and Adam turn to each other confused.

You both left together, him leading and you following silently and awkwardly, your confidence long and left you after Adam appeared. “So what’s your name again? Already forgot.” He says looking at you, bending down slightly for you to meet face to face, you backed away from his action, “err, Y/n.” you respond, looking away for a moment before looking back at him, “Well nice to meet you, names Adam, first man, best man.” He smiles, reaching his hand out for you to take, you hesitated before shaking his hand, wrying a smile, “pleasure.” You speak, only giving him that response.

You both exited the building before flying, going to who knows where, “soo, before we get started, should probably ask what you do before you jump in the big ordeal, what do you do and how can you benefit us?” He asks, you flying alongside him, “I can do stellar manipulation, cosmic manipulation and stellar healing but im terrible at it,” You rambled, pointing a finger up after listing off your abilities, “What I can do best is making sentient stars do my bidding, like the stars that are all over Halo city? I made those.” You smiled, “Woah! wait, you made all those things come alive? that’s fucking sick!” He says complimenting you, “So you must be a big deal huh?” He smirks, “Ehh, I guess?” You shrug slightly with a smile.

“Ohoh, if you can control those stars, then you’re perfect for this job.” He smirks as he lands, you landed behind him as you looked around at everyone, them all wearing the same suits, you were confused now, just what even is this job?

“Sir? where did you go?” a female voice asked, “Sera teleported me outta nowhere for me to bring someone along with us,” he explains pointing to you, you walk up to her, “greetings, I’m Y/n.” you smile and waved, “Lute, Adam’s Lieutenant.” She says as she straightens her posture, giving you a short and slim response. “Attention ladies! we have a sudden and new guest! this is uhh,” he pauses before leaning toward you, “fucks your name again?” he asks as you deadpanned, how does someone forget a name so fast? “Y/n.” You respond, “Y/n!” He says, “Seraphim of the stars or something.” He says, trying to make you sound like big talk, “She will be joining us today, she isn’t prepared but thats okay, she will just be an audience for today at most, so everyone prepare yourselves,” Adam says as they pull out spears, making your confusion more piqued, “and let’s this fucking show on a roll!” he shouts, a portal opening, him flying off with his lieutenant.

You were caught off guard from them suddenly flying off, you followed, a little behind but you caught up quickly to Adam, (being a seraphim and all) staying behind him and Lute, when you went through the portal, you paused in the air, confused on where in the world were you? everything was red, the sky, the ground, it wasn’t long before you started hearing screaming in the distance, the angel army was flying and attacking, monster like creatures, “What the fuck is this?” You say in shock, “Oh shit, you curse too? fucking sweet!” Adam says, showing up next to you, watching the angels slaughter the creatures, “where am I?!” You ask with a shaky voice, concern and worry filling your voice, “You’re in hell, bitch!” He says, summoning an angelic guitar made of pure gold, strumming it.

“WHAT?” You say absolutely baffled from his answer, you quickly turned to look down at the destroyed city, those little things running around and screaming, pleading for their lives as they get brutally slaughtered, “why are we killing them?! they did nothing!” You say in a terrified voice, looking back at Adam, “calm down bitch, fuck,“ He says, making you glare at him instantly, “they’re sinners! We give them divine judgment!” He smirks, flying down and killing a sinner without hesitation, “Stop it!” You tell at him, your angelic form appearing from how terrified you were to discover that your divine people were slaughtering innocent souls that have done nothing but accept their damnation, “No, you stop it!” He says, flying back up to you, making you fly back when he got too close, “Sera ordered you to follow my lead, you are under my command!” He yells back, an explosion happening behind him, a city building tumbling, you stared in guilt, you didn’t even do anything to them and yet all you could feel was pure sympathy and sorrow for those souls who didn’t deserve the judgment they were receiving.

“Now, you’re going down there and helping us kill these fuckers or you can sit and watch.” Adam orders, you didn’t have any words to respond with as you looked down at the sinners, there was a young lady who was carrying a child away from the chaos, you couldn’t help but watch, you were too stunned to process anything, Adam flew off mumbling something under his breath, definitely cursing at you but you didn’t even care at that moment.

An angel chasing quickly behind the two sinners, the angels spear charging towards the two, before you can even give a second thought, you summoned a star quickly, tossing it at the angel, hitting them down before they could hurt the two, you gasped, surprised from your own actions, you hurt an angel, the angels you’re supposed to care for and protect! you watched the angel shrug it off like nothing before flying away to a different direction, giving the sinners the chance to run, why was Heaving allowing slaughter? doesn’t this go against the very foundations of Heaven? why didn’t you know about this was ever happening? and how long has it been happening? Sera assigned you here, so it’s obvious she knows! why would she allow this- wait.. does the father of Heaven know?

You quickly flew down to the city to find Adam, to find answers, but all you saw was bloodshed and destruction, spears left behind and angels flying around like they were proud of themselves, it gave you a gut wrenching feeling, “please spare me! don’t kill me!” A voice called out, you turned to see a sinner running for their life, your eyes widen when you see an angel walking up to the sinner, a manic laugh following behind them, you ran toward the sinner and the angel, you stood between them both, stopping the angel in her tracks, “I command you to stop!” you say aggressively.

The angel taken back by your sudden actions and outburst, “What are you doing? move it.” the angel said, trying to shove you away but you pushed back and it made the angel push you completely to the ground, moved to the side, you didn’t have any attributes to physical fighting and it showed, you fell to the ground, looking up quickly to see the angel about to attack, without a second thought, you summons another star, a rather big one and made it push her aggressively, you made the star make the angel collide with a building, knocking the angel out, you gasped, not meaning to go that far but you turned to the sinner and ran to their aid, “are you okay??” you ask the terrified man before you, he looked at you in awe, you angelic features making the man stunned and mesmerized, “yes… thank yo- gh-“ the man choked, a spear through his throat, his blood splattered onto your clothes, hands and face, you closed your eyes for a moment from the sudden liquid of blood covering your face.

You opened your eyes and your eyes widened when you saw Adam and Lute in front of you, the sinner headless and long gone of life, “Fuck do you think you’re doing?” Adam said, yelling at you, you looked down and stared at the red, staining your hands, your breath hitched, you were trying to save a soul and it died immediately in front of you, before your very eyes, from feeling sympathy and sorrow, you clutched your hands tightly, a fit of rage riling up inside you, “ADAM! THIS STOPS NOW!” You shout, your angelic appearance in full as you flew into the air, cosmic dust following your form, your wings emitted cosmic dust, along with your hands, star dust following suit.

You glared at Adam, Lute glaring back at you, sensing you were about to become a threat, she immediately charged at you before swinging at you, you immediately summoned a star as a shield, side eyeing her, you made the star push her down, away from you, another star attacking her swiftly and powerfully, knocking her out too, Adam watched it happen so quickly, “What the fuck was that? what did you do to Lute?!” He says, going after you next, he was much slower but he managed to fight off your stars as he kept swinging at you, you being the faster flying, dodged easily, they may have been more experienced than you but they were so damn sloppy with their attacks. not to mention as a seraphim, you are much more stronger.

You flew higher into the air, a radiant aura forming around you, “This massacre ends now, Adam.” you say in a monotone voice, focusing on your power as you began to summon multiple stars, making all sentient at once, you were using a lot of stamina for this but you were willing to do this if it meant stopping this meaningless wrath of judgment.

You had made stars fall, multiple stars stuck onto Adam as he tried to fight them off but you made the goopy ones specifically for him, eventually he was invulnerable to move, the stars sticky and drippy, making it hard for him to struggle, you glared at Adam silently as he began to curse you out, you made a big star float flatly, carrying Lute back into the portal along with Adam as the stars took his guitar and carried it with him separately, your other stars retrieved the other angels in this army, dragging them all back forcefully to the portal, you made the other spare stars fly up to the skies and make it rain stardust in the skies, the dust was full of healing properties, making sure the sinners that survived could heal physical injuries, you hoped it was enough for them since you weren’t very experienced with the healing attributes you had, feeling your stamina drained, you flew back to the portal, closing it as you flew to the grounds of Heavens cloud, panting heavily, you had never used that much of your abilities like that before, all at once in fact.

You looked up to see Adam pissed off at, struggling to break free from goopy stars you still had on him, you laughed lightly at this, that shits kinda funny.

You splat onto the cloud, face first, regaining your stamina for a bit, meanwhile the whole army Adam had was conversing in confusing, they tried to help Adam get out of the goop but that only made the. stuck with him, you turned to lay on your back, wings following and looked up to the sky, for once, you felt rather proud of yourself for being able to full something like that but now it was the worse part to come, after recollecting your energy, you got up and flew off, dragging Adam with you, the stars of goop following as he muffled our screams.

When you returned to Sera’s office, you busted down the door with any respect, “Sera!” you shouted angrily, “We need to take about this job offer.” you grumbled, slamming your hands down her desk, the goop of stars putting Adam down as he deadpanned at you and Sera. Sera’s eyes widened from your sudden outburst and the blood covering your body, “I assume you couldn’t handle it?” Sera asked, after recollecting herself, “Handle it? I more than handled it, I dragged a whole fucking army back into Heaven!” You screamed, Sera glared as she stood up, “That was not your job, your job was to follow Adams orders!” she spoke back sternly, “This job and his orders are hypocritical to what we believe in! this is conflicting to the foundation of Heaven!” You argued back as Adam watched, Sera stared at you before sighing, “Can we speak alone about this?” she requests, eyeing Adam, signaling you to let him leave, “fine.” you scowl at her in detestation, you snap your fingers and the goop evaporated, also summoning his guitar to give back to him, “Christ, you’re a crazy bitch, you know that?” He says insultingly, he spoke as soon he got his guitar but you ignored him as the ordered the with a swift of your finger, the stars dragged him out the room and shut the door, all while you stared at Sera with displeasure.

“Why would you let winners and heaven born give divine judgment to sinners? What was your plan? What the fuck even is this job??” You began, hostility filling your voice. “The sinners were uprising, they were getting more and more bigger in population!” Sera responds, beginning her explanation, “and?” you asked unconvinced, “They were getting stronger, of they become to powerful, they may even reach the Heavens! they would take over and spread evil all over our realm.” She continues as you scoff, “and why would you think that? you doubting your fathers abilities to keep that under control?” you point out as she looks away, making you ponder, “does he even know you’re allowing your people to slaughter souls?” You ask.

She glared at you as she sat up in her seat, “He doesn’t and won’t know.” she says calmly and authoritatively, “seriously?! you’re doing this behind his back?!” You say, raising your voice in shock and anger, “unbelievable!” You say as you step beck from her desk, turning to leave her office, “and where do you think you’re going?” She asks, “where am I going? i’m going to tell all of Heaven on what the fuck you’re doing thats what!” you shout back, opening the door to leave but it shits immediately, Sera now in front of you, “you’re not going anywhere.” she says darkly, her figure towering over you as eyes appeared over her body, her angelic form showing.

You stepped back, looking at her staring daggers at her as she stepped closer to you, “and what makes you think I can’t?” you taunt, as she stood tall in front of you, “you will be silenced.” She says as pulls out an angelic spear of her own, knowing that she was threatening your life now, “What will Emily think when she finds you slaughtered her own sister?” You ask, putting up a facade of bravery, trying not show that she was getting to you, “Emily is not your sister.” Sera says aggressively and threateningly with pure hostility in her voice, seeing as that got to her it made you smug, “We’ll see when she finds out about how you allow her people kill the innocent.” You smirk with a shit-eating grin, knowing that no matter what she did, it wouldn’t turn out well for her.

It in-fact: did not turn out well for you, “We’ll see, when you’re gone for good.” She says as she swiftly moved you too quickly for you to react, her angelic spear carving your back, a mass amount of pain following as you screamed, you fell forward as she pushed you down as she stabbed her spear through her wing, making you wince in pain, adrenaline fueling your body from the shock that she actually took this path of violence. You tried to get up but she stepped on your back, pushing you back down, you look up at her in fear, her cold dead eyes staring into yours, “long before you know it, Emily will forget you even exist.” She says, swinging at your back again as you scream from agony, golden blood now mixing into the dried blood that covered you, you were shaking from terror and pain, she picked you up from your neck, as you struggled in her grasp, “stop- it!-“ you begged, trying to breathe, trying to kick her off you as golden blood dripped onto the ground in her office, she didn’t respond as she opened a portal, you turned to look, the familiar red skies before your very eyes, you turn to Sera desperately, “Don’t do this!-“ you gasped, struggling more in desperation, “You can’t!” You say, trying to pull her grasp off you, you were losing air and the stamina in your body.

“But I will.” She says with no solace or pity in her voice, she threw you into the portal with a second thought, closing it quickly, you gasped for air, adrenaline fueling your body as you regained oxygen to breathe but that was the least of your worries now, you were falling and your wings were to injured to fly, you were panicking as you tried to use your wings to fly but the pain was to unbearable, you saw your stars in the sky from earlier, protecting the sinners, thats it! thats your only ticket, you immediately tried to summon stars but it was a struggle to do so from how much power you already used from earlier, you had to overexert your abilities again, you mustered all the strength you had left within you, your angelic form showing as a bright colorful aura gleamed around you, you summoned stars but it was so hard to focus with adrenaline and panic that was fueling your body, you manage to make some stars but they were falling with you, some staying in place in the air for you to land on but you would quickly bounce off them from impact, you couldn’t focus at all, the sky rained stars that you had tried to quickly make but failed to use, it was too late as you crashed into the ground, a crater formed around you.

Your whole body hurt, it hurt more than anything you felt before, you weakly tried to sit up, you look at something glowing on the ground, you look to see a lavender blue star, the imperfect perfect star Emily had gifted you fell out of your hair, you winced in pain as your reached for the star, grabbed it and holding it to your chest as you laid back onto the ground, completely lost of any stamina and energy left to give.

Golden blood began to surround and puddle around you, the adrenaline and pain was the only thing keeping you awake right now, you laid there weakly, looking at the now red skies, you couldn’t do anything but only to try and breathe, trying to stay away, you were alone and no one in hell was going to go and try to save you. You were helpless, alone, once again. You couldn’t help but cry, scream in pain, why was this always happening to you? Why couldn’t you just find happiness? Why couldn’t the universe- help its only and dearest child? Your screams were so loud but they always heard im deaf ears, why did fate choose you to suffer this path? you screamed until you couldn’t anymore, you stared at the red sky as you waited for your in pending death. While looking at the sky, you see the stars shift toward you, raining their star dust onto you, the dust leaving soft touches on your skin, they felt like cool kisses, soothing your pain, you smiled weakly at your creations, your eyes feeling heavy as they tried closing, you fighting to keep them open but you eventually lost that battle.

eventually, everything went to black.

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TAGLISTT WEEEE:

@ag-cookiebat800 @meow-meowo @kyo-kyo1 @darling-may-i @pink-apples001

[erabu-san]

Burning going to be my new gender i afraid

+ a doodle i made yesterday before sleeping

[a-timely-problem]

Overheard at the BAU

JJ: "EMILY!"

Emily: "What's up, babe?"

JJ: "THERE'S A HUGE SPIDER IN OUR BED!"

Emily, car keys in hand: "On an unrelated note, I'm having a sleepover with Derek-"

/3 hours later/

JJ, eating a box if chocolate while watching a romcom: "And that's how to get alone time"

[myanxietydemonaretootired]

If I had a nickel for every fictional (sometimes non-canon) wlw ship I obsessed over to the point of tears and insanity I'd have four nickles.

It's not weird. I am just pointing it out.

[andreafmn]

Running in Circles | Chapter 11

Word Count: 3.5K Warnings: mentions of death and illness

Summary: (Y/N) Rossi is following in her father’s footsteps by joining the BAU team as a profiler. The girl genius knew almost everything but she could have never predicted falling for Aaron Hotchner, her boss, and her father’s friend. in their world mutual feelings are not enough to push them together. Will all the adversities and obstacles they face pull them together or push them apart forever?

A/N: slowly but surely rolling this story out... i refuse to DNF a WIP

<- Previous

David Rossi’s house had always been grand. At least for the better part of his life. But for (Y/N), it had always been massive. Even once she had grown up and moved out, she saw it as too big. She never had the feeling that she had imagined it bigger as a child. It had always been gigantic, and it would always be.

“You know, I made some fresh tagliatelle for today,” David smiled as he opened the car door for his daughter. “And I think it’s the best batch I’ve done in a long time.”

“It better be,” she teased jokingly. “Mom wouldn’t have accepted any less.”

“You’ve got that right,” he laughed. “She’d turn over in her grave if I ever made her pasta wrong.”

The Hotchner duo were already waiting by the front door when the Rossis arrived. Jack was the first to run into the house, claiming he was starving and needed to be fed. But as soon as the TV was on, it was like his hunger had vanished.

While the boy was entertained by some cartoon on the television, David ushered the other two outside. He took his cooking seriously and did not like much interruption when it was possible. So, with two glasses of red wine and a lit fireplace, (Y/N) and Hotchner sat on the back porch to talk.

“Morgan, Reid, and Prentiss are coming by later,” (Y/N) muttered out, trying to fill the silence. “JJ had a family thing, and Garcia is out of town.”

“I know,” he chuckled softly. “Dave told me when I was on my way to the cemetery.”

“God, I never want to think about today again.” Warmth crept up (Y/N)’s neck as embarrassment filled her veins. “I can’t believe I threw a tantrum like that at my age. I am absolutely mortified.”

“You don’t have to be, (Y/N). Grief isn’t always a pretty thing,” Hotchner said, taking her aback. “You’re allowed to feel what you feel, and sometimes it comes out in an ugly way. But it’s perfectly reasonable to have a break like you did. I mean, if it took this long, it was bound to happen sooner or later. And it was, in all honesty, not as bad as you think.”

“I yelled at my dad for simply being religious,” she sighed. “It was completely uncalled for. And I even did it in front of Jack. I can’t believe I did that.”

“I don’t think he’ll even remember after today,” he chuckled as he took a sip from his glass. “Seriously, (Y/N), it’s not something you even need to apologize for. I’ve seen and been worse than that.”

“I seriously doubt that,” the young woman snorted. “At least not the way I exploded today.”

“I’ve had my moments, (Y/N). We’re only human, at the end of the day,” the man shrugged as he absentmindedly slipped his hand over hers. “But you don’t have to feel bad for feeling strongly, and I know your dad definitely doesn’t hold it against you. All he cares is that you’re okay, and so do I.”

“I’m okay now,” she smiled softly, trying her best to conceal the red that was creeping up her neck. Thankfully, it was cold enough that she could blame the weather for her sudden change in complexion. “And I wanna thank you for coming today. I wasn’t sure you would.”

“Oh, Jack wouldn’t have let me live it down if we hadn’t gone,” he chuckled. His fingers interlaced with hers, squeezing softly and making her wonder. “He said we couldn’t leave you alone today. I mean, he was up long before I was.”

“God, I love that kid.”

“Yeah, he loves you too.”

There was a moment when their eyes met, and they couldn’t drop each other’s gaze. (Y/N) tried to find meaning behind the brown of his irises. Because he always left her wondering. Whether his lingering touches meant something more than comfort. Whether he showed his carefree side to her because he felt a different connection to her than the rest of the team. Whether stares like that one meant he was thinking the same way.

But the sound of David’s voice scattered the thoughts away, making the pair jump away from each other, their hands returning to their respective laps. “I brought some blankets to keep you guys warm,” he said as he placed the blankets on the arm of the couch and a tray on the edge of the fireplace. “I also brought you some cheese and crackers while we wait for the rest of the team to get here. They shouldn’t be long.”

“Thanks, dad,” (Y/N) smiled. “Did you have something to eat yet?”

“Oh no. I can’t spoil my appetite for later,” he chuckled. “I wanna make sure I savor tonight’s dish. I’ve been braising a chuck roast since this morning, and I can’t wait to sink my teeth into it.”

“Well, if there’s not much to do inside, why don’t you join us, Dave?” Hotch offered, much to (Y/N)’s dismay. “No point in you being by yourself.”

“As intriguing as that sounds, I’m not interested in spending my evening out in the cold,” the older man said before the sound of the door squeaked behind him. “But I think someone else might join you.”

“Hey, Jack. What’s up, buddy?”

00“I’m bored, dad,” the kid whined, draping himself between (Y/N) and his father. “And I’m hungry. I wanna go to (Y/N)’s house. She has toys there.”

“I’ll leave you to it,” David chuckled as he cheersed the man before disappearing back into the house.

“We can’t go to (Y/N)’s house right now, Jack. I told you we were gonna have dinner with David tonight.”

“But he doesn’t have any toys,” the boy complained. “His house is really boring.”

“Tell you what, little man,” (Y/N) interjected. “My dad may not have toys here, but he has a lot of stories about my mom, and today is about her, right?” The kid nodded eagerly. “Well then, let’s go invade his personal space.”

Jack grabbed (Y/N)’s extended hand, walking into the house with Hotch trailing behind with the platter that had just been set before them. They rushed through the kitchen and past the living room, looking for the one person who could talk about Iris’ past.

They had made it almost all the way to the man’s study before they found him in the hall, staring at a painting. Without turning his head, David started talking. “This is one of the first paintings Iris made in her garden,” he said. Before him hung a realistic painting of a small girl, a bird in her cupped hands, and an array of colorful flowers on the background. “I think it might just be my favorite.”

“Who’s the girl?”

“That’s me,” (Y/N) smiled at the boy. “When I was really, really little.”

“And your momma painted that?” Jack questioned excitedly. “It’s really pretty.”

“She did,” David responded with a sad smile. “She painted almost all the art in this house. She was a very talented woman, my Iris.”

“What happened to her?”

“Jack,” Hotch reprimanded his son. “I’m sorry, he…”

“It’s alright,” the man smiled. “She got very sick while she was pregnant with our little (Y/N). But the doctors didn’t catch it until it was too late because of that. After she gave birth, we started her on the most aggressive treatment we could, but it had spread too much, too fast. A little after (Y/N) turned three, she passed away.” “She was getting weak at the end, and a single painting would take her weeks,” he said. “You can see that they get smaller here by the end of the hall. But even if she couldn’t hold the brush for too long, she would…”

David’s voice drowned out as he continued walking with Jack, not noticing that his daughter stood frozen in her spot while he went on. There were things she knew about her mother’s past, but there were others he had kept hidden. Much like that one sentence, he had muttered absentmindedly to tell the tale of her mother’s demise.

Tears welled in (Y/N)’s eyes once more, this time sprouting from a deep well of emotion that she had trapped inside herself a long time ago. There was a part of her that always knew, that always felt as though she had been the reason her mother had died. But there had never been any confirmation, not a single word spoken to confirm what she had thought. All up until that day. Without even meaning to, her father had opened one of the deepest wounds she thought had healed.

She felt Hotch’s hands on her arms before she heard his voice, her mind hazing over as the thoughts flooded her head, making it close to impossible to focus on reality. “Hey, (Y/N),” he whispered as he cradled her face, bringing her back to the moment. “What’s wrong? What happened?”

“It’s my fault,” she whimpered, her eyes meeting his through a watery gaze. “My mom’s dead because of me.”

“Of course not,” he stated. “She was sick, (Y/N). The cancer got to her, and there was nothing anyone could do. That’s all that happened.”

“They would have found it sooner if she hadn’t been pregnant with me,” she cried. “She could have treated it earlier if it wasn’t because of me!”

Hotchner wrapped his arms around her before she could crumble to the ground, watching as her emotions overtook her. With an already overwhelming day, learning more about her mother’s death had tipped her over. It was then that he could see just how young she still was. As mature and intelligent as she was, she was still starting off in life—not even thirty yet.

“What happened to your mom is not your fault,” he said, his chin resting on her head. “Having you was the choice she wanted to make, and most definitely the right one. From what I can tell, she loved you very much, (Y/N).”

“You were her greatest treasure,” David added, startling the pair apart. “She wanted nothing more than to have you, mia bella. Iris would have given up everything so you were born, and I would have as well.”

“I’ll leave you two to talk,” Hotch whispered to (Y/N), motioning to Jack to get closer. “Let’s go see what’s on TV, okay?”

Once the Hotchner boys were gone, the young woman fell into her father’s open arms, resting her head on his shoulder and allowing him to comfort her in the way she so desperately needed.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” she whimpered quietly. “You always said she got sick after I was born, not while she was still pregnant. Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I didn’t mean for you to find out this way, little bird,” he sighed, drawing comforting circles on her arm. “I never wanted you to feel guilty for your mother’s death. All I ever wanted was to protect you, sweetheart.”

“She would have probably been alive had she not been pregnant, right?” (Y/N) said. “You’d still have her if it wasn’t for me.”

“I carry a part of her with me every day of my life,” he smiled. “And neither I nor Iris would have it any other way. I couldn’t imagine my life without you, little bird. You are my entire life, just like you were hers.”

David gently led her to the other room as the doorbell rang, kissing her head softly before going to open the door.

Soon enough, the house was filled with more familiar faces sporting flower bouquets and wine bottles, saying hello because there were no other words on a day such as that. All they could offer was their presence and their love, and whatever else they could need.

And at that moment, what they needed was a warm meal and lighthearted conversation. Being with the team was enough to calm (Y/N)’s sadness. At least for the time they were there, she could pretend she was okay.

She sat between Morgan and Hotchner with a gorgeous plate of pasta and roast before her and no appetite. She had spent so much energy already crying that she had nothing left to eat.

“Everything okay, pretty girl?” Derek whispered to her as he noticed her demeanor. “You not gonna eat?”

“I’m not really hungry,” she sighed. “Can’t really stomach anything right now.”

“You wanna get some air?” 

“Maybe after. I don’t wanna interrupt everyone’s dinner.”

“If you’re sure,” he said, squeezing her hand comfortingly. “But you let me know if you need to step away at any point.”

“Thanks, Der,” she smiled. “I appreciate it.”

What neither of them noticed was the piercing stare Hotchner kept on their joined hands. He wasn’t sure where the feeling had come from, but he could feel it bubbling deep inside his gut. Without even thinking, he slipped his arm behind her chair, his fingers softly drawing circles on her shoulder.

“You doing okay?” he found himself whispering to her, his heart quickening as her eyes met his. “It’s been a hell of a day.”

“Yeah, I’m okay,” she smiled. “Just not very hungry.”

“Do you want something lighter? I can get you some crackers and cheese instead.”

“No, I’m fine, really,” she said. “I’ll probably just take this and eat it later tonight.”

“If you’re sure,” he conceded. “Just let me know, and I’ll get it.”

“Thanks, Hotch.”

“Don’t mention it.”

It didn’t go over anyone’s head that the unit chief had kept his arm behind (Y/N)’s chair while they finished dinner. But to them, it was simply a way to keep the grieving woman at bay. No one thought that he was staking a claim on her after that green emotion settled in his chest at Derek’s comfort. Not even he did.

Even after they had all finished eating and had gravitated to the backyard for the last glass of wine, Jack dead asleep on (Y/N)’s lap, Aaron remained close to her. Back on the couch they had been hours before, he kept a protective arm around her back. It didn’t mean anything, he told himself. He simply wanted to make sure she was okay.

Still, his eyes memorized the way the light of the fire danced on her skin, painting her with a warm hue that made her look heavenly. He felt it then, as he watched her take a sip from her wine glass, a smile on her face and his son asleep against her, that flutter in his chest he thought had died with Haley.

At that moment, he blamed it on the alcohol. Aaron couldn’t be feeling what he thought he was for (Y/N). Not only was she his subordinate, but she was the daughter of one of his oldest colleagues and friend—not to mention she was almost half his age. No, he had simply drunk too much, he told himself. His quickening heart rate and the flush that warmed his skin were because he couldn’t tolerate booze like he used to. Nothing more, nothing less.

Suddenly, David tapped on his glass with his ring, calling everyone’s attention and breaking Aaron out of thought. “Well, I want to take a moment to thank all of you for coming over tonight and celebrating Iris’ life with (Y/N) and me,” he said. “I know none of you got to meet her, but I can say with great certainty that she would have loved each and every one of you. Iris was an extraordinary and beautiful woman, and I am glad her legacy lives on in the form of (Y/N). “She was, in a way, the second greatest love of my life. And I say second because she gave me my first,” he said, smiling warmly at his daughter. “I am grateful for the time I had with her and I am immensely blessed to be able to have a piece of her with me for the rest of my life. But I will say, my biggest regret in life will always be not getting the chance to show her just how much I loved her in life and asking her to marry me. If I had to do anything over again, I would have married her the day I met her. I had already bought a ring by the next week, but somehow, I never got the courage to ask her. So, tonight, I wanna raise a glass to Iris Cassidy on the 25th anniversary of her passing. I loved you then and I love you still, mia fiore. Until we meet again, my darling Iris. Salut.”

Everyone raised their glasses, echoing the cheer before taking a sip of their wine. As they did, David pulled out his phone, and a minute later, colorful fireworks adorned the night sky. One after another, they illuminated the darkness in various shapes and colors, marking a true celebration of life.

It was at that moment that Aaron noticed the fresh tears falling from (Y/N)’s eyes. The lights of the fireworks reflected on the streaks of her cheeks, glimmering in an array of colors as she stared at the sky. But it was the first time in the day that her tears were accompanied by a bright smile. And when she found him staring, he couldn’t help but smile back as he hugged her closer to him. Completely ignoring the pitter-patter of his heart as he felt her warmness seep into his body.

The scene was almost like out of a movie. As the fireworks lit up the sky, gentle music played through the backyard speakers. The group talked amongst themselves quietly, engrossed in whatever conversation was important at that moment. It was almost as though the world had stopped. There was no evil lurking behind their doors waiting to be caught. There was only them and that moment in time—frozen, preserved.

But it wasn’t the team that caught the unit chief’s attention. No. It was the young woman next to him who had seemed to drift off to sleep just like his son. Jack had wrapped his arms around (Y/N), resting his head in the crook of her neck while she rested hers on his shoulder. Her eyelids fluttered as she slept, finally comfortable enough to rest—or too tired to stay awake. Still, she looked calm, at peace. And she looked beautiful.

They were thoughts that shouldn’t have been running through Aaron’s head. Not about (Y/N), at least. And definitely not while her father was only a few feet away.

“Guess the day finally caught up to her,” David whispered as he sat next to them. “When she’s like that, all I can see is the little girl that always asked me to read her to sleep. Granted, those days didn’t last long. She learned how to read on her own, and Good Night, Moon, and Oh, The Places You’ll Go didn’t cut it anymore. Treasure those moments, Aaron. They go quicker than you can imagine.”

“Thankfully, Jack has yet to grow out of his kid’s books,” he chuckled softly, highly aware that any move he made could wake (Y/N). “But one thing’s for sure, once they’re down, they’re down, huh.”  

“That’s true,” he laughed. “I want to thank you, Aaron, for being here today. She needed someone, and it wasn’t me. (Y/N) always seems so strong, but she carries her heart on her sleeve and so much hurt on the inside. She needs someone she can rely on.”

“Today was the least I could do after all she’s done for Jack and me,” Aaron smiled, looking down at the sleeping woman. “I owe her a lot.”

“What she does, she doesn’t do it for anything in return,” David said. “She got that from her mother. She’d give the clothes off her own back for anyone that needed it.”

“She really would.”

“I just wished she found someone who could see just how amazing she was. I know this job makes it hard to meet people, but she deserves someone who treats her as special as she is.”

The words made the man tense up, causing (Y/N) to wriggle in her sleep. If he hadn’t known any better, he would think David had read his mind. But coincidences, rare as they may seem, were real.

“You do too, by the way,” the man teased as Aaron thought of a good enough answer to give him. “It’s about time you start dating, too, you know.”

“Here we go again,” he chuckled softly. “I don’t need to date.” Which wasn’t entirely a lie. Especially since the one he was most interested in was not an option. “I’m just focusing on work and Jack. That’s enough.”

“For now,” the older man grinned. “But I guess you’re young enough to still take your time. Just not too much.”

“I’ll take it into consideration.”

“Good,” David said before taking a beat. “But you better leave (Y/N) at home. Looking at you two right now, anyone would think you’re a couple.”

“Yeah,” he chuckled awkwardly. “Wouldn’t want anyone to make that mistake.”

But oh, how he yearned for it to be his reality.

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