#Every cell is cat coded actually

[plasma-b-cell-appreciation]

Uhm sir please stop looking so cool

[strawberry-milkbunny]

Naruto is my Roman Empire and I’ve been reading MadaTobi fanfics so these r my Founders Thoughts that nobody asked for:

- Tobirama had a crush on Madara and it PISSED HIM OFF like they def had hate sex at one point LMAO

- they literally worked together ur rlly gonna tell me they didn’t have SOME moments of civility btwn them?? (lowkey that’s wild tho having to see ur brother’s murderer everyday at work-I like Tobi but I’m just sayin)

I WANT A WORKPLACE SITCOM WITH THE FOUNDERS SJSKKSKS:

- Tobi doing experiments and scaring the villagers

- Tobi teaming up with Madara to make Hashi do work

- Hashi making flowers w/government documents

- Mito sipping tea while encouraging Tobi to revive the dead

- everyone in the Tower side eying the sexual tension btwn Madara and Tobi and them never denying they’ve fucked before

- Toka cackling in the background

- Hikaku spraying water at Madara like a cat every time he throws a temper tantrum

- Kagami popping in to make sure his clan head doesn’t kill his teacher PERFECT SITCOM MATERIAL

- totally personal preference: Naruto should’ve had more BLOOD AND GORE. I wanna see the grittiness and horror the shinobi world actually is and how revolutionary Naruto as a character is by choosing peace over violence. The only time we get that is Obito vs Kiri nin, Uchiha Massacre, Wave Arc, Orochimaru…before it turns into DBZ fights

I’ve said this before: Sasuke was in a seinen Naruto was in a shounen

- the warring states is literally the perfect place for exhibiting the horrors of war and humanity. Bloodline thieves, child hunting squads, GIVE. IT. TO. ME. Madara and Hashirama experiencing all of this and wanting PEACE FOR THEIR YOUNGER BROTHERS UGHHH ROBBERY‼️‼️

SORRY TW IMPLIED SA !!:

I HC that bloodline thieves is prob why Madara wears gloves….being a YOUNG (he’s been on the battlefield since he was 8??) powerful, prodigy and future clan head of a famous kekkai genkai it makes sense why he doesn’t like skin-contact/sexual repression and repulsion. And why we don’t see female Uchiha shinobi (excluding misogyny) simply bc there’s such a high risk of SA in this era

Moving on:

- Tobi and Izuna were jealous of how their brothers were being taken away. It goes past the senju/uchiha rivalry like they were just kids and were plain jealous.

- Madara and hashirama def share 1 brain cell LOLLL. Like they’re besties for a reason, Madara acts likes he smarter but nah he’s as much of an idiot as Hashi is. They’re both dreamers let these boys live and skip rocks together!!! 😭😭

- let’s be honest: Tobi built the village. Mans was doing ALL the logistics and infrastructure

- tobirama is soooo second son/eldest daughter coded it’s not even funny. The SPARE, serious and emotionless bc he needed to always clean up after his siblings, DUTIFUL, prob has a praise kink etc.

- Madara is an eldest daughter who also prob has a praise kink and touch starved

- NONE of the founders r well adjusted like they went from spending everyday of their lives at war to tryin bring peace and start essentially a ninja-revolution (PLS GO TO THERAPY)

- madara was just the most open about it: being isolated and feared by his own clan BC he was powerful, trying advocate for the village and peace, all while grieving for his last brother…yeah it makes sense y he went crazy or at least wanted to leave (fuck Kishimoto for that Kaguya bs and fuck Zetsu)

- I don’t actually believe he was trying destroy the village idkkk. I think he was trying to do an SNS aka using fighting as a way to communicate with Hashirama and well…yIkEs

- tobirama is 1000% unadjusted: mans literally created a Justu to revive the dead. You cannot tell me that doesn’t REEK of desperation and loneliness. He’s lit rally the OG mad scientist

- hashirama rlly thought sealing the Bijuu and giving them to each village was a good idea….sir WHO TF GIVES NUCLEAR WEAPONS TO SHINOBI???!! 😳😳

- I think hashirama and naruto lowkey can be summed up as: a powerful idealist. Which is a very dangerous combination. Take that how you will especially considering how shinobi thrive off of violence….it kinda makes sense how we ended up with canon Naruto

- Madara has a god complex and knows it. Hashirama has a god-complex and doesn’t know it. (God of Shinobi title def got to him and understandable)

- the founders failed and they know it. But I also kinda love it?? They’re so flawed and human as leaders and you can see how their mistakes drag into Canon Naruto. It also makes me so sad knowing that Konoha was built to prevent child soldiers and give protection only for it to actually be WORSE (Kakashi ITACHI SANNIN ik for a fact it must’ve hurt Hashi to know ur own granddaughter left the village)

Uchiha are: love is the death of duty while the Senju are: duty is the death of love and neither of them will forgive each other for picking one over the other‼️‼️‼️

- proving this ^^ w/Hashirama’s weird af characterization: aka him being a loveable idiot but at the same time CONGRATULATING Itachi for killing his own clan for Konoha…. I feel like that rlly showed me how much of a war veteran/shinobi Hashirama actually is and how he will always pick duty

- we were ROBBED of baby Kagami/hokage Kagami 😤😤😤 I’m sorry Kagami should’ve been made Hokage it just makes sense personality wise and politically wise. The only way I could see him not take it is bc he needed to be a clan leader/placate the Uchiha/help Hikaku.

- I wanna see him process the loss of his clan leader, teacher, and eventually friends to a point where Danzo takes his eyes

- everyone on Team Tobirama had a crush on Kagami at one point

- one of my fav HC: Tobi and Madara co-parenting Kagami. There’s no way Madara didn’t check up on Kagami being taught by THE senju which makes his defection hit harder for Kagami 😭😭

- BABY SANNIN ‼️‼️‼️ Tsunade was old enough to meet and remember Hashirama it makes sense that Oro and Jiraiya meet the founders

- omg could u imagine being Edo Tensei Hashirama?? Ur granddaughter’s weird friend revives u using the Jutsu ur brother invented that you specifically FORBID 😭😭

- Hashi and Tobi staring at Orochimaru like “you look familiar???” IT HAS SO MUCH COMEDIC POTENTIAL

- Mito revolutionized female shinobi like she’s def the reason ppl realized that girls can fight (Senju Toka was an exception) STAN MITO 🙇‍♀️🙇‍♀️

- Mito pulled a Tsunade and mentally yeeted out of Konoha after Hashi and Tobi died. Bc the way we NEVER hear about her and Hiruzen interacting except for Kushina, even tho she’s literally RELATED to the other 2 hokages….ROBBED 😵‍💫

- I HC: she was dealing w/grief (the fall of Uzushio made it worse) and she was lowkey pushed out of the council by Danzo FUCK DANZO

- I love the idea of Mito wooing for Hashirama’s hand/politically smart Mito!! It was a political marriage that grew into love. There’s no way she DIDNT suspect an attack on Uzushio lik it’s literally an island w/Kiri as it’s neighbours….Konoha gets recognition and stability while Uzushio importantly gets mainland allies

- Mito tops btw she’s def pegged Hashi before 🫢

- if Madara or Hashi had sisters/born women they would’ve def had a marriage to solidify their alliance. This makes Japanese homophobia not make sense esp in the shinobi world bc their clans trusted each other w/o backup like marriage?? Idk I’m just kinda confused y it was never even brought up for an alliance…

*cue MadaTobi arranged marriage au 100k, enemies to lovers, slowburn*

- also to dude bros homophobia has no place in the Naruto world (and IRL BTW) outside of making heirs. They’re literally MERCENARIES You telling me Kakashi has never fucked another man for information before??? Pls be serious I’m begging y’all 🙃🙃🙃

- there’s def family drama amongst the senju!! Idk I feel like Hashirama and Tobirama have the relationship of: “they love each other but don’t like each other” which makes Madara’s inclusion even worse for the brothers’ relationship. Like they def always had each other’s backs but never actually felt like they understood each other.

- I wish more fanfics/canon covered the shinobi-civilian politics more (I love politics lol give me world-building kishimoto 😤)

- Civilians hold power. THEY have all the MONEY to pay shinobi

- I’ve rlly only seen 1 fanfic that involves the Fire Daimyo during the Warring States Era (Into the Wide Blue Yonder it’s a KakaSasu Time travel fic that actually ✨works✨ 12/10 recommend) but it’s true.

Wtf is the Fire Daimyo doing during this era??? Why is he being so placate about Senju/Uchiha war unless he just sees it as entertainment?? How have shinobi NOT fought against rich civilian politicians before?? (Introducing Maoism to the naruto world lol 🤔🤔)

- Kishimoto curse ur goldfish brain….

- the uchiha and senju were def broke in this era, LMAO especially the Uchiha and I mean resource wise. War is EXPENSIVE the Uchiha don’t have Hashirama and Mokutan, they couldn’t just grow food whenever they wanted. It makes total sense that they would agree to a ceasefire just to prevent STARVATION

- once again…. robbed in terms of seeing the aftermath and devastation of war and learning how to live in a morally grey, politically unstable, resource limited world which could’ve brought in the ultimate themes of peace and the cycle of violence, and the question of if violence and war is ever justified, but…..no ❤️

[dmwrites]

“Yo.”

“Jev!” Gem said excitedly, clutching her phone to her ear.

“Gem?” Jev asked. “Did you get a new phone or something? I didn’t recognize the number.”

“I’m not in Hermitcraft right now, I’m away on another server.” Gem explained.

“Ohh.” Jev’s voice got distant for a second, like he’d pulled the phone away from his mouth. “Modded server area code, I see. Cool. So, what’s good, Gem?”

“Well, okay, so, it’s a bit of a complicated story so I’ll summarize it for you. Basically, I’m on this server, it’s a modded, oh wait you already said that, but yeah it’s a modded server run by Scott Smajor- you know Scott, right? Eh, that’s not actually too important to the story; so in this server we get different origins every time we die, and there are like six lives total, like a cat but… less, I suppose. Anyway, so first I was a swarm of bees which was super cute and so cottagecore, then I was a blaze and I was so hot, and now I just fell off a building and now I’m a slime! Like you!”

Gem took a deep breath and waited for Jevin to say something. It took him a few seconds to respond.

“Uh, yeah, okay, sorry, was just processing all of that word soup… so you’re a slime now, like me. That’s… what it comes down to?”

“Yeah!” Gem said with a smile.

“Well, slimes are the coolest mob out there, so, uh, congrats on that.” Jev replied.

“Yeah! I’m, like, translucent and colorful and I can produce children!” Gem said excitedly.

There was a very pregnant pause from the other end of the phone, so long that Gem had to check and make sure that she was still in the call.

“… produce children.” Jev finally repeated, sounding a little shocked. “Care to, uh, elaborate on that one?”

“I just like… I dunno, pop them out! Like cells reproducing. Do you produce children too, Jev?” Gem asked.

“I- hm, no, can’t say I’ve… no. Must be a modded thing.” Jevin said.

“Well, anyway, all of that silly stuff aside, I wanted to ask you an important question.” Gem continued. She looked out over her lands, a small frown coming to her face. “It’s important.”

“Okay…” Jevin replied cautiously.

“Are there any like slime secrets I need to be aware of? Slime code or something?” Gem whispered it into the phone.

Jevin snickered, then cleared his throat. “Oh, Gem, you called the right guy. Slime. Whatever. Yes, there is a very secret code of the slimes that must be obeyed by all slimes at all times.”

Gem gasped. “I knew it! What is it?”

“I dunno, Gem…” Jevin trailed off. “I mean, it’s super secret… and what if you turn into something else and then tell someone else our secret?”

“I promise! I won’t tell anyone!” Gem cried. “Oh, please, Jev!”

“Okay.” Jevin said. “Gem. The one and only code of the slime is as follows: all slimes must fart when they enter a room. It can be silent, it can be loud, but it must be a fart. For whole slimes, it’s easy, they practically make wet fart noises every time they move. For slimes like us, we just gotta fart.”

“Fart? Really?” Gem asked, frowning. “I never hear you farting when you walk into rooms.”

“Oh yeah. It’s very important to slime culture.” Jev said importantly. “If you don’t, other slimes will really look down on you. And I have mastered the silent fart, that’s why you don’t hear me.”

“Okay.” Gem said, nodding her head. “Farting. Every time I enter a room. Got it. Thanks Jevin! What would I do without you?”

——

“Who was that?” Cleo asked when Jevin sat back down next to her in Cub’s TCG arena.

“Gem. Who’s winning?” Jev replied, nodding at the TCG match between xBcrafted and VintageBeef below.

“On a numerical level, Beef. But on a spiritual level, xB.” Cleo replied. “So what did Gem want?”

Jevin snickered. “So she’s a slime origin on some modded server she’s playing on right now, and asked if there were any, like, rules of slimes. I just lied and told her that slimes have to fart every time they enter a room.”

Cleo cackled so hard that Joe Hills, who was moderating the game, threw a trident at her to shut her up.

“Oh my god, Jev! You didn’t! Gem is going to murder you when she finds out the truth.”

“Whatever. Worth it, tbh.” Jev replied, and joined Cleo in laugher.

[moonlit-imagines]

Rekindled

Dick Grayson x Kyle!reader

warnings: guns/violence, death, brutality. like, the typical arkham game themes. not graphic, tho!! mostly mentions

a/n: this sorta takes place in the arkham knight storyline but you really dont have to know anything about that game to read this, i wanted to give enough detail bc i liked this idea and the arkham game fandom is under appreciated. also lowkey y/n is based on an oc but almost all my y/n’s are <3

prompt:

Gotham was on fire. You were dumb enough to stay behind. Selina had been MIA for longer than you were used to, and every effort of contact was futile. Last time this happened, she had been arrested and thrown into Arkham City, so it was needless to say that you were a bit worried.

Last thing she told you was that a “pretty worthless supervillain” needed her help with something, but she left it at that. Yeah, she had a habit of making herself scarce, but she was your only family and you two always kept in touch. And now that the evacuation was in effect, you felt even more uneasy.

You pulled on your suit, black leather and spandex hugging your body tighter as you zipped up. Pulled your gloves on, claws and all. Clicked the belt around your waist, equipping your small set of weapons and utilities. The headpiece was pretty simple, just some silly cat ears to match your aunt’s, along with the goggles for good measure.

Gotham was more dangerous than you’d ever seen, only delinquents like yourself roamed the streets. Except, they didn’t carry a code like you. Scarecrow caused a panic, this “Arkham Knight” had a personal vendetta to fill, the city was on its knees. Tanks were starting to load onto the islands, troops taking over buildings, and riots overwhelmed what little protection was left here. You knew a few places to go, but your best bet was the movie studios.

Panessa, Batman’s secret base with the Wayne name slapped right on the outside, it always made you smile when you saw it. You were hoping to find an ally inside, maybe someone who could help you find Aunt Selina.

And you may be thinking you’d just sneak inside like a lovely little cat burglar would, but why not try the front door. “Stray.” You spoke into the voice box and chuckled as the doors opened for you. “It’s like they were waiting for me to crawl on back.” You stepped inside and into the elevator and poked the down button, trusting the rickety old elevator to deliver you safely to the lower level.

When you stepped out, there was only one familiar face that wasn’t behind a pane of glass. Didn’t know Batman kept prisoners. “Y/N?” Robin asked from across the room, setting down his tablet to meet you halfway. “What the hell are you still doing in Gotham?”

“Selina’s missing and I didn’t want to leave without her. What’s…all this?” You motioned at the containment cells, starting to understand why there were prisoners when you noticed their Joker-esque features. The lot began to make trouble, beginning to harass and poke fun the same way that clown would.

“Ignore them. I’ll call Batman.” Tim told you. “Make yourself comfortable, I guess. You already broke in.”

“Broke in?” You scoffed. “I used the door, actually. Still have my little voice thing activated. I just had to say my name and I walked in. Kind of rude to assume I just break in just because I happen to be a burglar from time to time.” You ranted and heard a chuckle from Robin just before Batman answered his call.

“He wants to talk to you.” Tim called you over, holding out his arm in an awkward way to you could talk to Bruce.

“Tell me everything, y/n.” Batman instructed.

“Hey, good to see you, too. Uhh, yeah, so Lina said she was hired by some loser supervillain to steal something they needed. That was basically all she told me before she left, been a few days. Can’t get ahold of her.” You explained, looking over at Tim and shrugging. “She considers most of the so-called ‘supervillains’ of Gotham ‘losers,’ though, so it doesn’t really narrow it down.”

“Okay. Stay at the movie studios. I’ll look into it.” Batman hung up just like that and you rolled your eyes.

“Yeah, I’m not allowed to leave either. This…” Robin motioned to the Joker lookalikes, “is what Joker left behind in his death. All that infected blood from Arkham City, it wasn’t all caught, and I have to find a cure.” Robin went back to his tablet and you sat on a nearby chair. “Catwoman tell you much about the City?”

“Only that it was a shithole and Two-Face is a loser.” You started scrolling through the computer before you, reading little lab notes here and there. “How’s Oracle?”

“She’s in the city, of course. Refused to evac, wanted to help, but no one expected anything less.” Robin noticed you snooping, but let you continue. “Nightwing’s okay, too.” Your eyes peeked to the side and your brows raised. “Well, not really. Ego’s bruised since Harley Quinn and Poison Ivy kicked his ass the other night.” You laughed out loud, quite amused by the news.

“Good, he probably needed it.” You leaned back in the chair. “You know, I could probably help out there.”

“I already tried, Batman said to stay here.” Tim sighed.

“I don’t work for Batman. Maybe I wanna go kick some ass and try to find my aunt.” You explained, only half-jokingly. If was only seconds after that projections of the Riddler showed up all over Gotham. “Oh, brother. Not this guy.” You groaned, watching Nygma go on about his plan until Catwoman appeared on screen, causing you to bolt up and out of your chair. You would have run for it now if not for his explicitly telling you to stay away.

“Oh, and Stray, dear? Keep away, please. This is for Batman and Batman only, and if you get too close I might just…oh, well, you know.” Riddler chuckled at the insinuation that he’d detonate the bomb around Selina’s neck. Robin looked to you, noticing you were completely flush as you watched the broadcast.

“Y/N, he’s won’t let Nygma do anything to her. Try to stay calm.” Tim tried to snap you out of it, which only caused you to transition from fear to rage, jumping up from the chair and pacing around to keep from hitting him.

“Just…shut up, T—Robin. Shut up.” Your claws were drawn and you were steadying your breathing before things got ugly for everyone. More taunts were thrown at you from the Joker-infected and you needed to get the hell out of here, so you headed for the elevator.

“Wait, hey! Y/N, you can’t go out there, it’s not safe.” Robin jogged up beside you, but you ignored him. “You can’t save her right now, Riddler is obsessed with besting Batman. You can’t interfere or it’s over.” You stepped into the elevator and just as you were about to press the button, “Dick is in the city.” You paused.

“Why do I care?” You rolled your eyes and watched Robin pull a wrist communicator from his belt.

“You care.” He handed you the comm. “You can call any of us with that. We have our locations on, too. Keep in touch.”

“Where is he?” You sheepishly asked, looking down at your boots. You knew Tim had a stupid, told-you-so smirk on his face.

“Near the docks, he’s working on something. He’ll probably need your help.” Your eyes sort of lit up when you heard that, but you quickly took yourself back to reality knowing Tim was just trying to make sure you weren’t alone out there. For Dick’s sake.

You were still considered apart pf the family, even if Selina and Bruce weren’t a thing at the moment and you and Dick had gone your separate ways. You still caught yourself thinking about Dick Grayson often, wondering what could have been, what you would have done differently, why you guys even chose to leave. Sometimes it made sense, sometimes you struggled not to pick up the phone.

But now you stood on the rooftop of Panessa Studios, looking out to a city in ruins. A city in need of saving. As much as you respected Bruce, there’s no way you believed he could do this all alone. And if he was going to save your aunt, maybe you should lend a helping hand in the meantime. You fiddled with the device on your wrist, trying to get the hang of the new model communicator until you found Nightwing’s contact programmed in. Clicking the button made your stomach drop, you froze up as the line rang.

This comm was given to you, but wasn’t updated in the system as yours, so Nightwing answered the message from Batcom #1 and was shocked to see your beautiful face waiting for his answer. “Y/N! Are you…are you still in Gotham?” Dick’s calling of your name was embarrassingly high-pitched, but he recovered it upon his question. “Please tell me you’re not here.”

“Dick, I’m wearing cat ears and my aunt is being held hostage at the moment, of course I’m here.” You sarcastically answered, just like he remembered. “Tim gave me this thing, said I could go help out if I wanted. Just have to stay away from Riddler stuff for the night.” You explained, showing the Panessa Studios sign in the background.

“Yeah?” You could see Dick’s smile, like he and Tim knew exactly how to plan and you just wouldn’t figure it out. But despite this cold, brutal night, you felt all warm and fuzzy inside when that smirk grew on his face, you knew he was happy to have this opportunity. “I kind of need a partner for what I’ve got going on, Penguin’s doing something shady down by the docks. Wanna join me?”

“I could get behind that.” He sensed a bit of flirtation in your voice. “Meet you there?”

“I’m already here, why don’t I meet you in the middle? It’s really bad out here…” Dick rubbed the back of his neck nervously, thinking he’d come on too strong.

“You’re worried about me?” You chuckled and he told himself his suspicions were true. “How sweet.” You began walking to the edge of the roof, beginning to plot your path to avoid any psychopaths that may try to murder or kidnap you. “It’s not that far, I’ll be fine.” You hung up on him and he took a deep breath. Seeing his ex, probably his first love, after a long, long hiatus, it probably freaked him out more that Gotham’s takeover right now.

You barely felt the nerves he did, you knew you had a certain power over him. Not that you’d like to use it, not like you used to. Getting away with petty little crimes with your charm until you finally gave him a chance, let him show you the other side of things. Betraying that trust would put you down the wrong path once again.

Dick waited patiently for you, staring at the rooftops you may travel across to try and spot you, completing ignoring the smoke and flames from below. Running into trouble up there wouldn’t be much of a problem, everyone was busy robbing stores and shooting each other on the ground. You’d heard about some freaky bodies strung up on rooftops, some more Riddler shenanigans hidden around the place. Honestly, it didn’t surprise you much. This was Gotham City, where anything could happen.

Soon you found yourself just a few more steps from your past. You and Nightwing, both masked, stood across from each other with only a gap between buildings between you. With a graceful leap, you swung above the road and landed right beside the vigilante, who was a bit too stunned to speak, but he was the famed Dick Grayson…he doesn’t stay quiet for long. “Nice landing.” His smooth voice made you smirk involuntarily.

“Hope I didn’t keep you waiting.” You rolled your whip up and clipped it back to your belt.

“Eh, you did…but I’m willing to forgive and forget.” He quipped in his nonchalant tone, same boy you’ve always known. “Bat bossing you around?”

“Yeah, he wanted me to stay at that run-down movie studio. I really wasn’t about it.” You sighed, looking down at the arms deal below. “But I guess you know the feeling a lot better than me. I never really listened to the guy, you know?”

“Oh, I know.” Nightwing chuckled, kneeling down by the ledge. “You’re my inspiration for breaking away. Always giving Bruce shit, not taking him seriously. He hated it.”

“Hated me?” You asked him, wide-eyed.

“Actually, I think it was the reason he liked you so much back then. Usually people see him as like, an authority figure.” Nightwing explained, still observing the Penguin goons below. “And the people who didn’t listen were usually still a little afraid of him. But you were just that ‘kid’ who never quite listened and didn’t quite care.” You chuckled at some old memories that came back to you with his words. Memories of awkward patrols and first encounters with Batman and the first Robin. You and him were so young back then. So young and so hopeless.

“So you’re saying he approved of me?” You teased with a taunting smirk and poked Nightwing in the arm, causing him to scoff and roll his eyes. “Oh, yeah, the big bad Batman approved of the poor little street cat.”

“Well, as close to approval as possible. He is still a hardass.” Nightwing realized in that moment how easy it was to fall into your old ways. No awkwardness, just two people who have a bond you can’t break with time. “So, uh, these guys down here.”

“Righttt, the Penguin guys. North Refrigeration, huh? Man, you’d think Oz wouldn’t be so predictable.” You remarked as a car sped past you on the street behind, shooting an automatic rifle into the sky, but you paid little mind to it. “Remember the Iceberg Lounge? He must really like the cold.”

“He’s definitely got a gimmick.”

“Don’t we all?” You pointed to the cat ears on your headpiece and you both burst into quiet chuckles. “Are we gonna go down there or what, Dickie?” Your nickname for him made his heart flutter.

“Bruce wanted me to wait, he’s got a plan.” Nightwing sighed. “I’m only listening now because of how insane it is tonight, but I wish he’d let us handle it ourselves. He needs a break.”

“I think we all do.” You crossed your legs on the concrete rooftop and wrapped your arms around them, looking past the illegal activities below and over at the city skyline across the water. “If we all make it out of here alive, I think it’s time I leave Gotham.” You stared in silence for a few moments, pretending not to realize Dick staring at your profile. “Wanna do my thing and not listen to Bruce?” You snapped out of it and raised your eyebrows in a playful way. “You can’t say no, it’s not in my nature to listen to big strong men.”

“You wanna go bother these guys down here? They’re just doing their jobs.” He joked, getting up to play your game.

“Oh, well that’s too bad.” You shrugged, nearing the edge of the roof. “Maybe I just wanna say ‘hi.’”

“Oh, well if that’s all you wanna do.” Nightwing stood beside you and you both took a quick leap from the building to the ground, startling the group of thugs and interrupting their very important work.

“Shit! Catwoman?” One of the thugs asked before getting punched in the gut by yourself.

“Hah, he deserved that! Rest of us know who you are, Ronnie’s just a dumbass.” Another thug assured you before Nightwing shocked him with an escrima stick. You both took turns knocking around these cronies until all of them were laid out across the ground, only ones left were hiding inside of the van beside you.

“That was fun.” Nightwing nudged you with his elbow as you walked side by side to the back of this van. “We’ll have to do that again sometime.”

“How about when we find their hideout?” You suggested, knocking on the van doors. They flung open and were shocked to see two vigilantes waiting for them, then desperately drove off just as you’d planned. Nightwing grabbed you by the waist, pulled you close, and used his grapple gun to bring you both back the the rooftops so you could easily follow the van without being spotted. It was a bit off-guard, being pulled in like that, but you didn’t mind at all.

After some time and a bit of flirty remarks here and there, you both made it to the Penguin’s hideout. “You sure you’re in? There’s a lot of people in there, we can still wait for Bruce.”

“Come on, Dickie. It’s nothing we haven’t done before.” You tilted your head to have him come along with you and led him to an unconventional entrance. “It’s gonna be tons of fun, you’ll see.” You opened the rooftop vent and slid down first, crawling beneath the floor and estimating how many men you’d be going up against with your infrared goggles. Probably twenty or so, but you and Dick had trained together for a long time, it would all come back to you in an instant—you hoped.

The both of you popped out from the shadows and immediately started beating on these criminals, watching them all scramble to figure out how to react. “Told you, fun!” You called out to Dick, tossing a pair of bolas at a goon’s legs causing him to trip right into Nightwing’s roundhouse.

“Never doubted you for a moment!” Nightwing answered, pushing another thug your way so you could catch his arm with your whip, pulling his fist into his face. “Ouch! Why’d you do that, man?” Nightwing punched your victim once again. “Starting to think you like getting hurt.” The two of you continued throwing punches in sunch a calculated, synchronized way, catching a few as well. Once a thug managed to land a punch to your face, Nightwing was right to the rescue. “You okay?”

“Never better, baby.” You held your cheek and he worried you’d got a concussion for a moment before realizing you called everyone “baby.” Dazed, he also caught a punch to the back, knocking the final thug down with only his elbow. “That was it? That wasn’t even a challenge, that was a warm-up.” You told Dick, who was still kind of staring at you. “Hey, I told you I’m fine, don’t worry.” You smiled.

“It’s not that.” Dick chuckled. “It’s just, I’m thinking about what you said earlier.”

“What’d I say?” You kicked a guy’s arm away from your foot, wondering what Dick meant.

“About leaving Gotham…I’ve got an extra room at my place.” Dick shamelessly offered, but you could hear the nervousness in his voice.

“An extra room? Did you move apartments?” You raised a brow and saw his cheeks turn red under his mask.

“Uh, well…no.” He rubbed the back of his neck with his gloved hand. “I have extra room in my bed, though…if you’re down.” You stared at him, shocked and expressionless. Not many people could do that to you. “I don’t want to put you on the spot, and I don’t want to make you uncomfortable. I don’t expect anything out of you, but y/n, I want you in my life again.”

“…What?” You quietly answered him, still dumbfounded by the sudden proposal. You absolutely loved seeing him tonight, and you loved fighting beside him, and you loved him. It was like everything was coming back together.

“I left Gotham, I left everything behind. I left you behind. And I know that was both of our decisions, but if you’d just leave Gotham with me tonight, after all of this is over, I’d like to start over with you however you’d like.” Dick and you stood below these dim string lights in this criminal base surrounded by beaten foes, piles of money, and loads of firearms. A hell of a place for a romantic speech like this. “I just realized how much I was missing without you. And all the dangers of tonight, and you and I getting stuck here. I don’t want to be apart again, y/n.” He confessed to you.

You both quietly stood there a moment, not knowing what to do. You were still sweating from the fighting that had concluded a few minutes ago. Still breathing heavy with a fast heartbeat, but now for a new reason.

You said it yourself, you wanted to leave. Tonight solidified that decision. And Selina would understand. You were a Stray, you went where it was good for you, and maybe Blüdhaven would be good for you. It wasn’t on fire nearly as much, didn’t have as many supervillains, wouldn’t give you a target on your back.

And it had him.

And he was offering you everything.

And without another thought, you took a few paces forward into his arms and pulled his face in for a deep kiss, hands carefully cupping his cheeks as not to scratch them. Dick was surprised at first, but couldn’t resist what he’d been wanting since he left for Blüdhaven. He wrapped his arms around your waist and slowly kissed you back, the passion was still there. Both of you felt it.

You pulled away slightly and gazed into his eyes, both smiling stupidly from the kiss. “Does this mean you’ll come with me? Please say it does.”

“Yeah, Dickie, I’ll come with.”

taglist: @ravenmoore14 // @summersimmerus // @xoxobabydolls // @evilcr0ne // @thedarkqueenofavalon // @elenavampire21 //

[cursedbycain]

Codes:

A - angst

F - fluff

S - smut

* - best works!

Cain x Lane

Strangers - being locked away isn't so bad, as long as you have company (A)

Haircut - even immortals need haircuts (F)*

Confessional - confessing to a priest has never been so sinful

Unzipped - a rooftop moment turns into something they can’t take back (S)

Cathedral - after deciding to explore a cathedral, Lane meets a man she’ll never forget

Raindrops - maybe a meeting in the rain has its' upsides (F)*

Rooftop - a tender moment before everything goes sideways (A, F)

Eternity - spreading you open is the only way of knowing you (A, F)*

Wager - Noah and Lester are just too nosy (F)

Tags - trust is given in different ways (F)

Overboard - Lane finds safety in the arms of the one person who understands her (A, F)*

Melody - learning something new is always fun (F)

Marked - sometimes responsibilities can be put off (S)*

Once more to see you - come inside and be with me, alone with me (F)

Elle week!!*

Yan x Lane

Unlocked - Yan isn't going to let a cell get in his way (F)*

Morning - every morning is a new beginning (F)

Fresh - alone time gets a little out of hand (S)

Late night talking - the talk is never fun (S)*

Ceilings - lovely to be sitting here with you (F)*

Canyon moon - the world's happy waiting (S, F)

Agora hills - kissing, i hope they caught us (S)

Dmitry x Yan

Touch - feeling so lonely because it's not enough (A, F)*

The archer - I've got a hundred thrown-out speeches I almost said to you (A)

Cassiel x Audrey

Hate me harder - something bout you makes me wanna do things that I shouldn’t (S)*

Invisible string - a quiet moment of solitude (F)

Lane finds a cat - Cain x Lane (F)

Lane + jealousy - Cain x Lane (A)

Cainlane - leave your mark on me

Cainlane - alone

Dmitryan - you could never accept that someone might actually like you

[darsynia]

Don't Read the Last Page (Tony Stark/Engineer!Reader multichapter)

Summary: Your friend Nat claims her plan to distract Tony Stark with her sex appeal isn't working, so she wants you to do it with your brain--and a sexy red dress. Things start out completely over your head and get more complicated when SHIELD becomes involved.

Length/Warnings: 3,500 | none (future smut!)

Masterlist | MCU Masterlist | Tony Stark Masterlist | Next

Excerpt:

“Put on a persona, if you have to. The one I chose, okay, yes, sex kitten, but-- and don’t laugh,” Nat sighs. “I’ve been playing it so straight, Cat. I thought sure he’d break, but it’s almost like he can tell that I know it’s innuendo? And by now it’s a game of chicken, and the man is too stubborn to lose. He’ll never back down.”

You can’t help the little smile of pride in the idea that the man you’ve been crushing on for so long can hold up against an onslaught like that, even though you haven’t ever met Tony Stark. Natasha is painfully gorgeous.

“So, what? You need me to be the Cat to your kitten?” you tease.

“Actually, yes.”

Chapter One: Alice In Wonderland

“Nat, you cannot be serious,” you say, holding your cell phone to your ear with your shoulder as you frown at the computer screen in front of you. The water temperature calculations in the unit you’re designing are all wrong, and you’d hoped to finish the associated code by tonight.

“You said you’d freelance for me, and I need you. Believe me, I’m as surprised as you are.” Natasha’s voice is every bit as dry as it always is, but today there’s a strong undercurrent of irritation that you hardly ever hear. “I can tell he’s interested, but I actually think the sex kitten thing is somehow overboard. I don’t think he’s going to go for me, but I can read him like a book. He definitely wants a connection, and I can’t risk him ending up with someone else. Bottom line: I need you.”

“I can’t believe you’re using drunken confidences against me right now! I have shit to do!” You were whining a little, but when your friend had joked that she might someday ask you to do some favors for the shadowy governmental agency she works for, you thought it was going to be related to computers, not the billionaire tech genius you’ve secretly crushed on for years.

“I think the hard to get thing might really work. Look, what we need is a sexy delaying tactic. You’re not going to have to sleep with him. You just need to catch his eye and keep him from doing anything really stupid with a woman at this birthday party. He’s feeling his mortality, Cat. We don’t want him to FIND it.”

“I still can’t believe that you, Miss Manipulation, have failed at doing it yourself,” you tease, saving your work and standing up.

“I overcompensated. It would have worked with the man in the file, but he’s not that guy anymore. Can I pick you up at 7?”

You pause in the act of shutting the light off in your office. “Woah, hold on. That was ‘wrapping up the conversation’ language. I have no idea what to wear, how to behave, where--”

“Shy sexy engineer, shy sexy engineer, Tony Stark’s Malibu mansion. I’ll pick you up.”

“Nat!” you protest, but the line has gone dead. The mirror you’ve hung on the other side of the reception desk helpfully reminds you that you’ll need to wear some extra concealer under your eyes, tonight. You’ve been pulling some late nights with this project. Productive ones, sure, but late. 

The concept is one of the most ambitious that your small design firm has taken on so far, but you’re passionate about it. The group of investors’ idea was simple: create a kiosk that can help eliminate the waste of single-use water bottles on college campuses. Students sign up and receive a BPA-free reusable water bottle that fits into any of the multiple stations placed around the campus, based on population and traffic patterns. In exchange for watching a few ads for a minute, their bottle is sanitized and filled with clean, cold, purified water for free. Companies can buy the ad space, and hopefully, if the project takes off, all that will be needed is the initial capital and a few fees for maintenance and water, paid for by the college itself. 

In theory, your small company made up of five friends with various engineering degrees definitely has the expertise to bring the concept into reality. In practice, it’s a lot bigger of a project than you had initially thought, especially now that a few schools in the area have been contacted by the investors to see if they’d be interested in being the pilot school. 

It’s far more coding than you’d anticipated, for one thing, and you’re the only one with the expertise to write it. You’ve got to finish this up, commit it, and then see if it actually works on the prototype in the back room, ideally before noon tomorrow. In a very real way, it’s your reputation, your name on the line if the company can’t deliver, for all that you’re not the face of the company. You’ve got Alan for that part. The stress has been bad enough that you stopped going by your business name in public completely, reverting back to the fanciful name you’d given yourself when you daydreamed about having a secret royal history.

You’ve shortened it to ‘Cat’ nowadays, since you’re not royal, though you are secretive. 

Even though you’re not really one for parties, you are curious about what a Stark party would be like. He’s ramped back his playboy lifestyle since miraculously returning from three months in that cave. Not all the way, though, you recall, because there was something in Monaco not that long ago, but you weren’t interested in Stark for that stuff anyway. You crush on his brain, really, though the rest of the package isn’t tough on the eyes.

If you’re honest, you’d been kind of glad that he’d gotten more serious and less reckless lately, so hearing Nat talk about him ‘feeling his mortality’ makes you worried, in a strange way. Ever since you were in high school, coming up on ten years ago, he’s been your celebrity crush, the person you kept an eye on, looked for references in all the magazines. You’re not really a celebrity watcher, but for the most part, Stark is different from an actor or sports guy. In your opinion, for a man with such innovative intelligence, his playboy lifestyle is as much of a waste of his talents as designing weapons. He’s done with the latter, but seems to be having trouble dropping the former.

Checking your watch, you sigh. It’s already five, and you need a shower. As you turn toward the stairs that lead up to the door to your apartment, you catch another glimpse of yourself in the mirror. God, you need a haircut.

“The only thing Tony Stark is going to do when he sees you is wonder who let in the mousy wallflower,” you groan. You never were a flashy, ‘draw all eyes when you walk in the door’ kind of girl, even though you do have a flair for picking clothes that accentuate your build. Still, the mirror is telling some home truths that you don’t appreciate right now, so you flip it off, holding your hand in that position as you walk up the stairs and tap out your code for the door.

An hour and a half later, and you’re in a push-up bra, matching panties, and a complete freak-out spiral. You have three dresses to choose from, and none of them are right, and you don’t have time to do anything else than pick one. You’re about to do the thing where you hang them in three different places in your room and spin around with your eyes shut till you stop with your finger pointed out, when you hear the front door opening.

It can only be one person, but you still grab your oversized white bathrobe and pull it on before you call out to her.

“Help, I am a damsel in serious distress. De-stress me, Natasha!”

“You need more friends if I’m who you would turn to for that,” Natasha says. She’s wearing a tight gray dress that, while stunning, doesn’t look like a party frock at all.

“Wait, is there a party? Because that is NOT what you of all people would wear to one. This is not a ‘you’ party dress. Particularly not if you’re… what did you call it? Trying to ‘sex kitten’ Tony Stark!” you protest, crossing your arms against the thick terry cloth of your robe.

“Settle,” Natasha says, but her lips curl up into a kind of a secret smile. “The party’s later, and I have to go in early. My boss wanted to talk to you a little bit beforehand.”

You back up and fall back onto your bed. “No, no, no, you’ve told me about your boss. He’s badass and terrifying.” Your tone turns whiny, then resolute. “I have stuff to do, Nat! I am reneging, right here, right now.”

Even as you say the words, your inner fangirl screams at you. No way do you want to miss the chance to be in the same room as Tony Stark, even if it means you have to withstand being glared at by Nat’s one-eyed scary spy boss.

“No, you’re not. Because I need you, and you will never forgive yourself.” Natasha is, as always, completely self-assured in the face of your frantic protestations. You’ll never forget the crazy way the two of you met, when she’d ducked into your store and frowned, confused, when she’d seen the empty racks for what had used to be a clothing store. After taking in her tight pleather fighting outfit, you’d thought fast, taking off your white hooded sweatshirt and tossing it to her. Natasha had put it on right away and you’d sat on the receptionist’s desk you were setting up, pulling open a folder and leaning over as if to present a proposal to a person sitting at the desk. She’d vaulted over the desk in a truly spectacular move, seating herself and zipping up the sweatshirt just in time.

The door had opened seconds later, revealing a tall, burly, terrifying-looking man in tradesmen’s clothing. “We’re closed!” you’d called out, and he’d grunted, looking around a few seconds before leaving.

“What about this one?” Nat says, from deep inside your closet. She emerges with a red dress that you’d bought once on a deep discount and then hidden in the closet, too embarrassed to picture yourself ever actually wearing it in public. It’s skin-tight, and the neckline/straps make up a bold X that crosses your chest in a brighter red than the rest of the fabric. Under the X is a second stylized X that stretches up to make a diamond gap between the two. The cut-out gives a daring glimpse of the lower curves of your breasts before the second X continues down to hug your hips. The damned thing continues its ‘high fashion’ nonsense in an angled cut just below your knees, except for where it slices up into a slit on your left leg, making a third, smaller X.

“I can’t wear a bra with that, Nat!” you hiss, even as you take the hanger and look at it. “Not to mention the fact that it’s literally a triple-X dress!”

“Just tell your inner self you’re living the dream?”

“I can’t believe I ever told you about having a crush on him. You know I’ll never trust you with anything ever again?” you gripe.

“Put on the dress, I don’t want to be late.”

It’s Stark’s favorite color, and actually fits perfectly. After you touch up your makeup to make it a bit more aggressive, with red lipstick that matches the dress (the one concession you’d made to someday choosing to wear it. The color’s been taunting you in your makeup bag since you’d come home with the damned thing), you’re actually feeling like a confident, capable person.

“That’s right,” Natasha says, coming up behind you and making eye contact with you in the mirror. “Put on a persona, if you have to. The one I chose, okay, yes, sex kitten, but-- and don’t laugh,” she sighs. “I’ve been playing it so straight, Cat. I thought sure he’d break, but it’s almost like he can tell that I know it’s innuendo? And by now it’s a game of chicken, and the man is too stubborn to lose. He’ll never back down.”

You can’t help the little smile of pride in the idea that the man you’ve been crushing on for so long can hold up against an onslaught like that, even though you haven’t ever met Tony Stark. Natasha is painfully gorgeous.

“So, what? You need me to be the Cat to your kitten?” you tease.

“Actually, yes.”

“Okay, I’ll wear this, but I’m not comfortable with the message the top… everything this dress is sending, so...” you say, and head over to the closet. On the way, you notice how you’re walking with more sway to your hips, like you can’t help yourself. You definitely feel like someone else, someone more bold, maybe? It’ll crumble completely if you were faced with the man himself, not that you probably will. Even with your assets on display like this, you’re still you, shy but tenacious, a ‘watch and learn’ kind of girl. Basically the opposite of his type. After years of spending time with every kind of woman, all of whom are begging for his attention, Stark will probably look past you like you’re not even there.

In the closet you find the long rectangular gold scarf/shawl your aunt had given you for Christmas what feels like fifty years ago. It’s still new in its rolled up package, and when you pull it out, you realize that its crinkled texture hides the folds perfectly. With the shawl wrapped around your shoulders in just the right way, the dress doesn’t look anywhere near as indecent as it did without. You look at yourself in the mirror one last time as you slip on your shoes, and the whole ‘sexy dress, demure shawl’ thing almost seems like a metaphor for the ‘hidden depths’ your family always joked that you have.

They wouldn’t appreciate these particular ‘depths,’ though. The only thing keeping you going is the fact that you look very different from your normal self. If everything crashes and burns, you can just pretend it wasn’t you, right?

“Okay, I’m convinced. Give him one glimpse of what’s under there and he’ll definitely be distracted,” Natasha says with a smirk.

“I bet he won’t even look in my direction,” you tell her as the two of you walk down the stairs and onto the store floor. It is, of course, devoid of the clothes racks that had been there when Natasha had barged into her accidentally unlocked door, that day. Now, eighteen months later, there’s hardly any customer-facing space at all, with double-high cube shelving separating the small lobby area from her colleagues’ workspaces. It’s cozy, but your company does decent business, and you’re proud of how far it’s come since then.

“I’ll take that bet,” Natasha says, pushing the door open with her ass and smiling a secret, knowing smile. “If he talks to you within the first half hour, you owe me my favorite take-out.” 

The place in question is basically impossible to park at, meaning if you lose, you’ll have to park fifteen minutes away to pick up the food. However, you picture the kinds of parties you’ve seen in magazines, with beautiful people all crammed together in a darkened room, and can’t help but feel confident. You don’t have the money, the attitude, or the clout to draw the attention of someone like Tony Stark.

“You’re on.”

When you get to a nondescript office building and park, Nat assures you that there’ll be a car coming to pick you up and waves you into the building. Once you’re inside, you see a man standing with his back to you, his long black trench coat doing all the work for him. 

“Nice to finally meet you, Catriona,” he says, still faced away. “Or should I call you Cat?”

“Feeling more like the mouse today,” you say, disconcerted that he knows your 'secret identity.'

“Don’t worry, you’re not prey. Not for me, anyway. Natasha tells me you were up to do her a favor,” he says, finally turning. He’s wearing an actual eye patch, and the front of him is every bit as badass-intimidating as the back of his black boots and coat had implied.

“You know technically, she owes me,” you point out. “And, is this a safe house? Wait-- don’t tell me anything top secret. I like my life. I don’t want to be in the witness protection program.”

You’re babbling, which is the other side of your extreme lock-up, ‘freeze and hope no one notices you’ coping mechanism.

“Nothing we’re asking you to do is at witness protection level. Just be beautiful, enigmatic, and smart.”

You can feel a blush rising on your face. “Uh, maybe I have the wrong building?”

“You think I’d let you in here if I didn’t know everything there is to know about you?”

Your stomach drops. “Can we start over? We can do the introduction part, and then I can find the floor I’m actually supposed to be on, and we can forget this ever--”

“Cat…” the man says, adding more gravitas to the name than you have in the decade-plus you’ve used it. “--did you know for the first few months, I thought you were an actual feline? You’ve been good for Natasha. Grounded her in the real world. She made me promise not to scare the shit out of you, and I think I’ve failed,” the man says. “My name is Nick Fury. I run an organization called SHIELD. We’ve had our eye on Stark for a while, mostly because we’d like to make sure he doesn’t implode and take half of the security of the country with him. We’re coming up on a delicate time, and I need to know I can count on you.”

You are starting to feel a little woozy. Fury can tell, you think, because he walks over, passes you to head into an alcove by the door, and comes out with a small chair. Even though you’re standing in what amounts to a darkened lobby, he places it right in the middle and gestures. You sit, because the alternative is to try to run out of here in heels, and if you did that, Natasha would make fun of you until the end of time. It’s really unfair of her, honestly.

“The bottom line, young lady, is that Stark’s a ladies' man, but his tastes are changing. Time was, he would have gone all in on someone like the character Natasha’s currently playing, but now, who knows?” Fury sighs. “Making his PA the CEO was actually one of the most brilliant ideas the man’s had since Afghanistan. But not if they’re going to be involved. That was what Natasha was supposed to deflect him from.”

“Wait,” you say, straightening up in the chair. “I’m just going to a party. I get to look pretty and be ignored by my celebrity crush. That’s it.” You’re shaking. Everything has escalated far more quickly than you ever could have expected, and you don’t even think taxis know about the building you’re currently freaking out in. You feel trapped, even though your faith in Natasha is strong enough that you don’t feel in any physical danger.

“Of course,” Fury says expansively. “I’m just letting you know what’s at stake.”

He’s trying to use your innate sense of responsibility to influence you, and while you’re offended, you’re also kind of impressed.

“I see why you’re the boss, anyway,” you mutter. Then, louder, you add, “But you’re not my boss. I’m self-employed. And not in the ‘boss babe’ kind of way.”

“I can respect that,” Fury says. He spins around to start pacing, heading away from you, before turning around and coming halfway back to stop and look at you. “I am not asking you to do anything you wouldn’t already feel comfortable doing.”

“That is such a line,” you blurt out, twisting your hands in your lap. “What if I tell you I’m not comfortable holding this conversation, or knowing the things you’ve already told me?”

“That is manifestly obvious. It’s also what makes you perfect for the thing I’m asking you to do.”

“What are you asking me to do?” you demand, the words coming out in a choked gasp. You’re so out of your element you can barely breathe, and the worst part is, Fury’s instincts are spot on. You feel a sense of responsibility, not just to Natasha, but to Stark. He's the sort of person who shows up in the news as often for a dazzling tech breakthrough as for a catastrophic break-up... or a kidnapping.

“Be yourself. In the process, give Tony Stark someone intriguing to focus on. Someone who isn’t his CEO. Think of it as helping him diversify.”

“If I called you a pimp right now, would you throw me out?” you ask, standing up and squaring your shoulders. You’ve always lashed out when cornered.

Fury laughs. “Stop trying to chew off your own leg and learn to adapt to the shackle. For all we know, this could just be for tonight.”

Until that moment, it hadn’t even occurred to you that it wouldn’t just be for tonight. You watch as Nick Fury casually checks his watch.

“Guests are starting to arrive. I’ve ordered a driver for you. The make and model of the car along with your attire should be enough to get you admitted, and if not, Agent Romanoff will. It’s been a pleasure.”

He holds his hand out to shake yours for the first time that night, and when you take it, your own is shaking.

“Chill. It’s not an assassination,” Fury tells you, squeezing your hand before letting go.

“Like you’d tell me it was at Employee Orientation anyway,” you grumble.

His laughter follows you out the door, where you find a sleek black car that’s probably worth just about as much as your salary for a year.

“Out of the frying pan and down the rabbit hole, I guess,” you sigh, opening the door and climbing inside.

To be continued...

Cat is kind of egged on out of her comfort zone in this chapter, thanks to Natasha's influence and her sense of duty-- but she can't keep up that intensity forever!

[life-winners-liveblog]

Oh hello Scar! Nice to meet you!

As the other whispers mentioned you came at an unfortunate time, but honestly, I doubt there would've been a right time. There were only bad times, and worse times

Thought I'd give you some welcoming gifts. *I drop a Jellie cat plushie; a holographic picture that seems to alternate between the earth, Mercury, the death star, and a supernova (ooc: admittedly, I haven’t seen anyone give Scar supernova symbolism, but I think it fits him well so I'm adding it); as well as a soft felted blanket*

Oh! Something to mention, Martyn is unable to hear us whispers, so we must communicate through notes with him. This makes sense to us but not to anyone else, especially not Martyn himself. This is hilarious.

-Saph

Scar: Oh! More Jellies! And an holographic thing! How does this work? I can put it in Therapists Scars! As for Martyn not being able to hear you, thats hilarious!

Grian: ehm ehm... Scar?

Scar: Yes Grian? Come for a sess-

Grian: No.

Scar: Oh.... why are you here then?

Grian: I am going to run a diagnostic on your code, I need to check something.

Scar: O...k? Haven't you looked at my code enough? It seems a bit personal-

Grian: It's one last check before I am ready to actually fix those hearts, just a last thing...

Scar: Alright...

Grian: This is going to feel... weird and unconfortable.

Scar: Oh! Your eyes are glowing! Are you doing it right no?-ooh is this what you meant by feeling weird????? It's uh... Very weird...very...ok ok ok and now I see the unconfortable...

Grian: It's analyzing every bit of your code, I heard people describe that it's like having grains of sand stuck in every cell of your body.

Scar: Yeah.... I can definitely say that it's accurate... I don't like sand, It's course and rough and irritating, and it gets everywhere.

Grian: Chill it Anakin.

Scar: You got the reference!

Grian: I lived with my Scar in a desert, you think it never came up?

Scar: To be fair I didn't know that.

Grian: I also did watch the movies...

Scar: ...

Grian: .... It's done now, I know everything I needed to know... I'll come back soon.

( in hope for more in character reblogs, those are always great to read)

[givehimthemedicine]

"they hurt you" / lab zapping and sa coding

so the sa-coding of the lab electrical punishments has been discussed but I just wanted to do a quick side post on the fact that we never actually see El get zapped.

but it's not like that's something they don't wanna show onscreen - we see it with One, Eight, Ten and Terry. but when it comes to El, we keep seeing it almost happen:

I'm about to post a big analysis about El lab csa subtext (how much is allegory and how much is subtext we can talk later) but I was like ok, they keep showing this NOT happening to El, so is that a strike against the idea? does this indicate that she lives under threat but hasn't actually had anything happen yet?

well, we know that various forms of zapping are very connected to the word "hurt"

then there's this. which like we've all said, can't just be about One getting zapped. it's far too weighty. besides, her knowing about the zapping isn't some Hail Mary revelation to pull out in this moment because they already talked about it earlier.

and El saying she and One are alike also tends to imply, but isn't a concrete statement, that she actually has been "hurt".

so has she? (I have a more support for it in my big post unfortunately. but right now I'm just addressing the hurt/electricity thing specifically)

yes she has, according to El's own dialogue in 2x7. when El says "I've killed," they provide the following two flashbacks:

2 quick observations.

I get that they're going for very snappy (ha) editing here, but they show only the neck-snap guy, and that was the guy who brandished the stun gun at her. they don't show wall-slam guy

in the brain melt clip, interestingly they DON'T show Connie. they do have time for a close up, but they choose MP dude instead.

and then we get this:

that clip of the orderlies dragging little El is the only one they put as support for "they hurt me."

she doesn't say they were going to - she says they did. so I am forced to conclude that El has, at some point prior to this lab scene, actually been zapped (so, "zapped").

but I have more questions.

if the orderly brandishing a stun gun constitutes "hurting" her, doesn't having a bunch of guns pointed at her count even more? El's so traumatized by seeing Connie shoot Benny, that she does that finger-gun thing with Mike - and yet that's not the greater thing to flash back to?

ah but now let me complicate it further - that clip is NOT of the orderlies she killed.

the killing happens in the cat version, seen in 1x3. the one they put here is from the 1x2 version, where El just gets locked in the cell and cries. it's not even the same two guys. the threat of a zap is still there because both have stun guns, but nothing really happens this time. they give her a rough shove into the cell, but that's it.

so the "hurt" being referred to is something which applies to even the non-stun-gun-brandishing orderlies. so beneath the surface, it's not about the actual guns / stun guns, or mere threat of harm, at all. this is something that has happened but which they declined to show.

idk, the fact they focused on the MP instead of Connie, even though she's the main antagonist of that scene; and on the stun-gun orderly instead of her actual first kill... like. did you just wanna lean in the more male/phallic direction both times? is that it?

because you already know how Choices are made with practically every stun gun / controller shot. and like. the imagery of stun guns hanging off the orderlies' belts is. rather.

hey. don't.

and just to round things off - idk what the current consensus is about the origin of those two phonecalls Joyce gets in s1 but there's just something about....

smth smth the thing about how Joyce's dialogue on the phone matches up with her conversation with Brenner in that one scene... ah yes this scene

idk man 😑🔫

[satancopilotsmytardis]

22. "Show me how much you need me" and a kink huh..... Maybe...begging? or choking? Idk have some fun!

(I'm still in the process of writing my comments for network btw it was just to good and I've fallen in love with it, so thankyou for writing it and sorry the comment is taking so long!)

Pairing: Shigadabi

Rating: E

Contents: Catboy!Dabi, mating cycle/heat, begging, implied marathon sex, sex toys, multiple orgasms, petplay, feminization

Dabi's life is a joke. Some sick, cruel god thought it would be funny to make a creature that wasn't made to survive and then Dabi spent every second fighting against that asshole's will to make it anyway. And it always sucked. Want a great quirk, kid? Too bad, burn on a mountain. Oh, you survived that? Replaced and homeless. Huh, you're still alive, and you've managed to get a good thing going with a little found family of criminals? Oops, you're a cat now. 

Because yeah, in the middle of the skirmish in Deika, Dabi had gotten blasted by a wayward quirk during his fight with Geten. And he's a cat now. Or more accurately, he's a heteromorph now. He was lucky he didn't get a big lungful of the gas because it would have turned him entirely into a cat if he had. What's less lucky is that the retractable claws, slitted pupils, fangs, tail, and extra ears are permanent now. Should have worn off after a couple of hours, but according to Ujiko, due to the skin grafts and treatments he received in his coma, you know, when he'd been considering turning him into a nomu, his body was more susceptible to changes like this. Which was the doc's nice way of saying he'd fucked around with Dabi's DNA and made his cells ready to receive some new code, but he'd escaped the hospital before that happened and this quirk had gone and filled in the blanks. And without extensive gene therapy that would take months, if not years and may prove fatal, Dabi was stuck like this. He's a cat now. Fuck his life. 

That's not to say being a cat is all bad. He definitely hadn't wanted to be a cat. But the inhanced senses are nice, and holy fuck does fish taste better now, plus getting pet is awesome-- even if Tomura is the only one he lets do it because it makes him purr like an idiot. Of the curveballs he's been thrown in life, this one has been one of the least horrendous, so he sucks it up and moves on with his life. And everything is pretty normal for the most part. They get things resituated with the PLF, he adjusts, and things are actually better for the League than they have been, possibly ever.

Until he starts waking up at night with the others pounding on his door telling him to shut up. Actually, they had been nice about it the first couple of times, asking if he was hurt or having nightmares or something, but he hadn't known what the fuck they were talking about. Absolutely thought they were gaslighting him as some kind of prank before Toga showed a recording of his door, and the awful loud feline yowls that had been coming out from the room, cutting out only after she pounded on it to wake him up. He has no idea why he's been, apparently, screaming in his sleep. He hasn't even had all that many nightmares lately, certainly not often enough to account for a solid week of screaming. 

He also starts to have the urge to rub his cheeks against things. His phone, his pack of cigs, the pillows in his and Duster's bedroom, the rest of the League. Keeps getting distracted and nuzzling against them, which they're being better sports about than the yowling thing. Even if he does hiss at them when they try to pet him while he's doing it. Usually snaps out of it at that point and excuses himself to be mortified elsewhere. He also keeps finding himself outside. Just walking. Keeps catching himself trying to scent the air like he's looking for something, and it doesn't do him any good. He can't find what he's looking for and he ends up back in the villa incredibly cranky and angry that he's going back to an empty bed. And then the cycle starts again. It's so bad and strange, that when Duster is finally finished with his latest round of treatments, Dabi goes to the doctor's lab to pick him up, just so he can see him as soon as possible. 

He gets there and finds Ujiko in the tank room with their new batch of High Ends, his lover out of sight. "Ah, he's sleeping off the sedation from his last treatment. Once he wakes you two are free to go." Dabi is about to go find somewhere to sulk until then, but reluctantly asks instead, 

"Been feeling weird lately, Doc, you got a minute?" Not thrilled that the mad scientist who was preparing to make him a monster is his only source of medical attention, but he's Dabi's only source of medical attention so he's going to suck it the fuck up. 

"Of course!" Hates how excited the mad doctor sounds about that and takes Dabi to one of the actual rooms and makes him sit on the table like he is a real doctor and Dabi is in for a normal check-up. The doctor draws blood, goes through the usual steps, and Dabi tells him about the weird cat behaviors that he's been dealing with lately while one of his weird advanced machines processes his blood. He doesn't like the way that his brows creep higher and higher as he speaks, but Ujiko just tells him, "Let's see what your bloodwork says." 

When that's ready, he reviews it and makes those humming 'ah fascinating' sounds the whole time which only serves to make dabi more irritated, his ears pinning back and tail flicking as his claws bite into his pants. 

"It seems as though you may be experiencing a... heat of sorts soon." 

Of every fucking thing that the doctor could have said to him, that is not one that Dabi would have guessed in a million years. "A what?" His brain reboots quickly, "That's not possible, aren't heats for girl cats?" 

Ujiko hums in agreement. "They are. Traditionally male cats don't have a mating cycle as such-- but they can react to a female cat's hormones even from quite a distance. There are other feline heteromorphs, it's possible that you're reacting to those pheromones, someone may be bringing more in through the villa, or, perhaps," and his tone changes to a little more careful in a way that sets every one of Dabi's nerves on edge. "There is some behavior or stimulus that you have been in contact with frequently that has had a... placebo effect, making the newly accepted cat DNA a bit confused about which behaviors it should be exhibiting in regards to sexual presentation." 

Dabi is about to make him fucking elaborate on that when the door opens and Duster comes in. Always is a bit paler after spending a week with the doctor, but he's dressed and got his prosthetics on, so he's probably ready to go. Blinks when he sees him. "Firefly, what are you doing here?" 

That's it, my pretty pussy, purr for me. 

Such a good girl, kitten. Taking my cock so well. 

Needy little thing, arching your back so cute. Pushing out your pretty tits. Just begging to be fucked full, aren't you, princess? 

"I'm going to murder you." He says in loo of anything else. And Ujiko just clears his throat and moves along with Duster's pre-discharge check-in. 

///

They get back home and go through work with Dabi hissing and snarling at Shigaraki any time he speaks to him. Duster, for his part, once Dabi had told him what the doctor said to him, had just looked vaguely amused about the whole situation. And the worst part is, the doctor was definitely right about the pseudo-heat. Because as soon as Shig is back, even though Dabi wants to be very, very justifiably angry with him, he's immediately so horny that it's distracting. When he's not actively snarling at his lover while they're in catch-up meetings, he's biting the insides of his cheeks bloody to keep from purring at him, or yowling, or trying to rub up against him to put his scent on him. And he's barely keeping himself from getting noticeably hard the longer the meetings go on. He's going to lose his mind if they aren't finished with this soon. 

It's a big surprise when, instead of him breaking and just forgetting the other lieutenants are very much in the room in favor of climbing right into Tomura's lap, that it's Toga who suddenly gives a loud, agonized groan and whines, with her hand covering her nose, "Can we please be done now?" And he realizes abruptly that her sense of smell is as strong as his. He hisses at Duster for making this situation even more mortifying. Shig looks between the two of them with clear amusement and concedes, dismissing everyone with a wave of his hand. Then he stands and gestures for Dabi to follow. If he weren't fucking gagging for it, Dabi would have told him to fuck off. Instead he immediately follows after him, an embarrassing feline whine slipping out of his throat in plain earshot of all of his co-workers. Spinner and Twice start to howl with laughter, but he's gonna have to kill them after he gets Tomura to rearrange his guts. 

As soon as the door to their room is shut, Dabi is pressing up against his lover. Loud, needy yowls leaving him as he rubs his cheeks against Tomura’s, against his neck, over his shoulders. And he's already hard just from the press of their bodies and the smell of his lover in his nose. Can't stop himself from grinding his cock against him too so he can feel how badly he needs it. 

"Oh, kitten," mewls so loudly when his hand goes to his hair, scratching nails just right around the base of one of his secondary ears. "After how rude you were before--" 

"Tomura," he whines. 

Catches his ear and gives a mean little tug. Just enough to hurt, and that almost makes Dabi's legs drop out from under him, his arousal spikes so sharply. Barely been alone for a minute and Dabi is so desperate that he'd happily cum in his pants, fucking his lover's thigh just to get some relief. "You really are just a needy whore, a bitch in heat, aren't you, princess?" 

"Yes, sir," he agrees immediately. His whole body feels hot. Not the way his quirk normally makes him, but in a tingly way that is making an ache expand out across his skin. Centered at his-- he gives a mortified little mew. Oh god, he's empty and that hurts. He needs Sir's cock inside of him. Needs his cum inside. 

Tomura's smiling at him, that lazy, mean smile that already turns him on nearly past the point of coherency when he's not in some animalistic state of mind. "Show me how much you need me, kitten." And Sir steps out of his space, watching him expectantly. 

Show? His mind feels hazy. He can do that though, he can show his mate how badly he needs him. His hands are shaking as he starts to shrug out of his clothes, made even harder because he can't put away his claws, but he manages to start shedding layer after layer until he's naked as he moves as fast as he can over to their bed. He's frantic as he grabs their lube and yowls loudly when he sees Tomura taking his sweet time to come over to the bed, chuckling as he undoes his tie. Fine. Dabi scrambles onto the mattress, trying his best to make his claws go away, but when he can't he gives up. Gets on his knees, spreading his legs wide, his tail pressing up along his back, and his shoulders and face against the sheets. His cock is throbbing and dripping a steady stream of pre, so much that he's already making a puddle on the bed. He whimpers loudly and uncaps the lube. Can't open himself up with his claws out, but he still spreads it over his hole. The first touch of fingers there makes him moan desperately and nearly forgets himself in the need to be fuller. Only is stopped from tearing himself open because Tomura's hand wraps around his wrist and pulls him gently away. 

"Oh, kitten, that badly?" 

It's all so overwhelming. He's never felt like this before. Is a slave to the needs of his messed up body again. Dabi can't help it. He lets out a weak sob, nodding his head as bloody tears slip down his cheeks. Tomura makes a soft worried sound, but then there's the rustling of fabric and the mattress dips. He presses along the length of Dabi's body, peppering kisses to the back of his neck. "Okay, princess, you're being such a good kitty, I'm going to help."

 And then there are fingers against his hole. Dabi purrs as they sink inside of him, trying to sniffle and choke away the tears. But he needs it so badly. Normally the stretch of his mate's fingers is needed before he can have anything else, but he needs to be full. His fingers aren't enough right now. Dabi rocks back against them, mewling and making a whole litany of feline sounds in his desperate need to be given what he really wants. Gasps, and whimpers, and sobs louder when Tomura shushes and pets him, kisses along his back, wraps his hand around his cock and starts to stroke him slowly and deliberately. But it's not enough, and Dabi accidentally sinks his claws into the back of his hand when he reaches to get his touch away from there. He needs more in his cunt, not that. Just needs to be fucked full. Get his mate's cum so deep inside of him, oh, just the thought has him meowing pitifully. 

"My pretty kitten," definitely worried now. "Are you hurting, baby?" 

Dabi manages to nod with another sob and Tomura coos and shushes him, fingers pulling out of his needy body much sooner than he normally would think necessary to take his big cock and the rough fucking Dabi needs so, so badly right now. "I'm going to help you feel better," he promises. "Going to give you exactly what you need, princess." 

And he finally, finally does. Tomura fucks him hard, Dabi purring and rocking back into every movement, pleasure so sharp it hurts, he can feel it pulsing everywhere in a symphony that sends his human mind so far away he can't do anything but let his instincts drive. His claws sink into the sheets, past them, into the mattress, and the sounds coming out of him are all animal. They don't mean anything to his mate, but to him, they're a constant spill of his desperate need. They echo around his skull, begging to be mated, to be fucked so full, to have his mate's cum pumped deep inside of him over, and over, and over again until he knows for certain that he's been fully bred. Dabi doesn't cum until he feels Tomura's release splashing wetly against his walls, and then he immediately collapses onto the bed, into the wet spot, fingers going to his now empty hole, wanting to keep as much of his cum inside as possible-- and only then realizes that that wasn't enough. That it didn't feel right as he pulled himself so quickly off of his mate's softening cock. It should have hurt. Something human tries to float up to tell him that, no it should not have, but his feline brain is positive it should have. That if it didn't then that means it wasn't right. He needs it again. 

He manages to get it another three times before his exhausted body gives out, but he's still not satisfied. It still felt wrong. And by the time Tomura has cleaned him up, even licking at his cheek to try and get him to purr, and put him into their clean bed, he's mewling weakly and crying again softly. 

Whatever amusement Duster had over the situation is long gone now as he pets him and holds him close, rubbing their cheeks together. "Dabi, can you tell me what's wrong? I can't help if you don't use your words, kitten." 

He sniffles, pressing in closer. "Wrong, n-not full enough. Hurt, Tomura--" stops with another loud yowl.

"What hurts, sweetheart?"

He shakes his head. "Need it, should hurt." And that makes Tomura tense against him, holding him a little tighter. But he keeps stroking his hair, soothing him, until Dabi falls into a fitful sleep. 

///

He wakes up screaming for it again, looking immediately for his mate, but he doesn't have to. Tomura is climbing back into bed with him, and pressing gently between Dabi's shoulder blades. He immediately drops back onto the mattress, pushing his ass up the way he'd presented before. Oh! There's already something inside of him. It's not very big, but it's there, and his mate eases it out of him, letting Dabi feel that he's wet already too. He purrs like a chainsaw when he realizes that means he can have his mate's cock immediately. Tomura starts to press inside and Dabi sucks in a sharp breath. 

And then he moans so loudly he nearly loses his voice. Tomura's cock is perfect. It's so big, always big, but it has a different texture now something that's just the right amount of sharp so that as he fucks into his pliant, desperate body, it hurts the way he'd needed it too. He purrs so loudly, losing himself to how right it feels now to be bred by his mate. 

Manages to cum much more easily than he did before, and when he's all filled up with his mate's cum, his hole aches as he pulls out and that sensation quells his intense need. He's able to roll over and sees that Tomura is wearing a neon green cock sleeve, littered with modest spikes along the whole length of it. 

"Whuh?" He manages very intelligently. His mate leans down and gives him a kiss. 

"Read up on cat behaviors, thought this might help. Was that better, kitten?" 

Wraps his arms around his neck so that he can arch and rub their bodies together from head to toe, tangling their scents all together as he purrs and nods. 

Tomura kisses his cheek, and then rubs them together, making Dabi's purrs go even louder as his tail coils around one of his legs, as if he could get him any closer without having him back inside of him again. "When this passes we can stop playing with feminization, firefly. Make sure it doesn't happen again. I'm sorry." 

Dabi shakes his head. "Don't want to stop. Like being your pretty kitten," just the thought has his cock starting to swell again and his hole tightening unhappily on how empty he currently is. "But if I get pregnant I'm killing us both. No hesitation, Shigaraki." 

Duster chuckles, "I checked in with the doctor again, not a possibility unless you grow a lot of new organs, baby. You haven't felt any intense abdominal or pelvic pain?" 

"Uh-uh," 

"Then you're fine. Just going to keep being needy for a... little while." 

And the change in his tone pulls Dabi a little out of the contented floaty place he was at. "'A little while'? How long is that, Duster?" Tomura winces slightly. "Tomura Shigaraki," He demands a little more harshly. 

"...Could be a whole week, kitten." 

"You are very lucky that I need your dick in me again, or I would kill you." 

"I'm sorry, firefly--" "Dick, right now, Duster!"

Thanks for submitting! Consider leaving a comment, they help to keep the typing box going!

[grison-in-space]

One thing you have to understand about me as a scholar is that before I fell wholly under the spell of behavior, I trained as quite a good population geneticist. There is still a large part of my heart devoted to the subject and the addictive intuition I can use when I'm studying it.

What this means is that when I think about disentangling what biological sex even is, I start with the chromosomes themselves. Mammals have a gene called SRY that lives on the Y chromosome, which is tiny and mostly chewed up in our species and several others. If this gene is expressed, the embryo expressing it triggers a cascade of hormonal signals during development that encourages the developing fetus to turn its budding gonads into testes, spin its genital tubercule into a penis, and generally walk along a particular well trod path towards one kind of reproductive destiny. If it's not expressed, by default the budding reproductive system develops ovaries and a clitoris instead.

This is is where it gets complicated.

See, that's how it works in mammals, but that's actually a strange setup in its own right when you think about genetic sex determination systems. You can really get quite exotic with those, including baroque variations on haplodiploidy[1]. But even if you insist on limiting your understanding of what biological sex is doing to mammals... well, for one thing, SRY isn't the way that sex chromosomes always worked. Monotremes don't have that gene. In them, as with birds and their W chromosome, the sex determining part of the heterogametic chromosome[2] is distributed across the whole chromosome, not confined to just one single gene.

And there are reasons that sex specific modulation genes might migrate to the heterogametic chromosome in any case. All sexual dimorphism creates an inherent tension between the expressions of genes and specific variants that are best for any given fitness optimum in each sex, you feel me? Think about the way some show chickens have to be bred to win at shows, between "best hen" and "best cockerel" competitions: often, breeders maintain separate lines for each sex, and never the twain shall meet! There's a pleiotropic pull that makes it harder to select for particular traits in a really dimorphic species. Transpositions of genes from one chromosome to another can mean a relaxation in the conflict of sexual dimorphism by more closely coordinating sex-specific expression.

This is one of the reason dosage compensation is a thing. Everyone remembers those little stories about Barr bodies and tortoiseshell cats, right? How every body with at least two X chromosomes is a mosaic of cell lines that silence and ignore all but one of those chromosomes? In cats where the locus for "no eumelanin" (i.e orange pigment only) happens to sit on the X, heterozygote animals (that is, torties) have hair cells that are a mosaic of cell lines that decided to turn off the X chromosome with the "black" allele and cell lines that decided to turn off the orange X? The thing is, most phenotypic variations are not driven by changes in coding regions: they're driven, often very strongly, by changes in gene regulation. This is why having an extra copy of an autosome is almost always lethal in humans: the sole exception is trisomy 21, which we usually know as Down's syndrome. Adding another whole chromosome's worth of gene product to the system for any but the very smallest of chromosomes just isn't survivable for long unless you have a mechanism to even out the imbalance of gene product--and the X chromosome is not a small chromosome in humans. It's what, somewhere between six and eight in size? (Autosomal chromosomes are named biggest to smallest.)

To make this survivable and okay, sex chromosomes get all kinds of special tinkering. They need to make sure that gene expression between sexes, in species with sex chromosomes, is as perfectly equal as possible. A surprising amount of the time, you'll find sex differences whose main function appears to be keeping things in some other system totally the same, minimizing variation between sexes rather than creating them. Bodies are complicated things!

So ANYWAY: if you want to understand sex differences as they are, outside the realm of typical genital development? You have to understand that biological sex is a function of tons of different systems that might or might not uniformly all co-vary in the same direction. For example, let's take a list of five imaginary traits, each of which can be scored on a scale from -1 (most masculine) to +1 (most feminine). If sex is a single uniform thing, you'd expect all of these things to covary, such that you'd see a relationship like this imaginary dataset:

Ind 1: 0.9 0.8 0.7 0.8 0.8

Ind 2: 0.1 -0.1 0.3 -0.2 0

Ind 3: -0.7 -0.6 -0.8 -0.5 -0.9

[1] Haplodiploidy means that if you have one copy of all your chromosomes, you develop as male; if you have two copies, female. This is how bees and ants and wasps work. In some cases, as in cottony cushion scale insects, you can even do a frankly bizarre thing in which you have some haploid "invasive male tissue" that exists pretty much entirely to fertilize your eggs so you can lay diploid daughter eggs without having to bother to find a male.

You can see a strong covariance of traits between these individuals, such that some measure of sex is inflected along a spectrum that then gives rise to the five related traits, with a filter for noise laid over top. But this isn't usually what we see in the sex differences literature: with the exception of reproductive organs themselves, usually we actually see results more like this:

Ind 1: 0.0 0.1 -0.4 -0.8 0.3

Ind 2: 0.7 -0.6 0.1 -0.7 -0.4

Ind 3: 0.5 0.3 -0.2 0.1 -0.8

See how variation at one spot doesn't do a good job of predicting the next in this data set? All of these traits are variable, and all of them have some individuals who don't quite cluster with "their" group. It's the covariance between the scores on various "levels" of sex that is low: that is, real differences between sexes exist, but we don't know why they're there, and scores on each don't correlate well with each other--especially for behavior.

In any case, there's quite a lot of good reason to think that SRY might actually not be the end all be all of genetic variation according to sex, even though it casts a deciding vote in which direction of gonadal development a given individual starts on. How much of variation between sexes in mice is actually a function of SRY and its androgenic changes, and how much is a function of the genes on the Y and the cis acting regulation of those genres, is an open question.

So the thing I'm reading about is: there was a random mutation in a mouse line that deleted SRY, producing mice that are XY but otherwise develop as fully fertile females. On the other hand, there are also transgene constructs that have SRY transplanted to one of four autosomes (the Four Core Genotypes model). This lets us disentangle the effects of chromosomal sex from, essentially, SRY- vs SRY+ positive (or testicular anatomy or whatever) development. It's extremely cool shit and I'm very interested in brushing up.

And that's what I was excited about, folks.

[2] The heterogametic chromosome is the Y chromosome in an XY system or the W in a ZW system-- as contrasted to the homogametic chromosome, which appears duplicated in ZZ or XX individuals. The distinction between the two is which sex is which: XX animals are female and XY male, but ZZ animals are male and ZW animals are female. Either works fine.

[winterpinetrees]

The Nuclear Engineering Department (The Gap Years 2x3)

September 17th

Salt Lake City, UT

There is significant overlap between nuclear physics and elven magic. Physicists love this. Elves largely don't. A secret society of gun-toting academics are trying to keep the reactor from getting set on fire. Sierra and the boys are here to help.

Merry Christmas and/or Happy Hanukkah! This one is very self indulgent because it is also a gift for me.

Navigation Guide

Previous

..................

Sierra doesn’t mind the lack of cell service too much, no matter what the boys may expect. She’s an analog girl. Software is finicky, and Python hates her in its silicon heart. If code really is a language, then she’s still tripping over the grammar, and her computer is a lot less understanding than her grandparents when she messes up Spanish conjugations halfway through a phone call. Because of that lack of cell service, Sierra misses the breaking news story that the head of the nuclear physics department at a university she’d visited was murdered in his office. His office was ransacked, and every sensor said that radiation nearby had spiked.  If she’d seen, she can’t say whether she’d have grabbed the wheel and had Brian drive them anywhere else but Salt Lake City, where students only a few years older than them run a functional nuclear reactor, or if she’d have headed straight for it. Instead, they get a hotel room for the night, and wake up smelling smoke in the air. 

…but this is the American west at the end of summer. Clay cracks the window open to confirm his suspicions, sighs, and doesn’t think much of it.

“Guys I jinxed it. Smells like wildfire out there”. He says once Brian and Marin have joined him in the room. This time the four of them have a suite with two adjoining rooms in a better hotel. Last they heard, Zerada and Jezero are twenty miles away on the outskirts of a salt flat. Sierra and Brian nod, but Marin walks to the window and looks out. There didn’t used to be a fire season, but there didn’t used to be cellphones either. Time crawls forward and humans adapt. Sierra wouldn’t have bothered to look, but Marin scans the horizon with his cat-like eyes. 

The window faces east towards a few foothills, and the sun rises blood-red just above them. The color is explained by the plume of smoke in the foreground. He looks back over one shoulder. Since the prison break, Marin has been dressing a bit more like a prince. The golden cuffs on his locs and fancy elven boots aren’t too noticeable, but it’s a change from how he started in June. 

“No, I can see the smoke, it must have been a building”. Then he blinks a few times and turns back around. “I am never going to get used to this desert smelling like radiation. How many nuclear bombs did your government detonate here?”

Three phones come out of pockets. They’re all googling different things, but Clay finishes typing “Salt Lake fire news” first and reads out his result. “That’s the physics department at Utah”.

“I think the bomb testing was in Nevada, but eight or…” Sierra replies to a different question. She trails off as she realizes what Clay has said. 

Brian jumps in. “Sierra, why is this news story saying that the University of Utah has a nuclear reactor on campus?”

“Because some colleges do! MIT has one of the biggest, but there’s like two dozen across the US”.

“I think what Brian is trying to say is that a nuclear reactor being on fire could be Chernobyl or Excalibur levels of bad,” Clay explains.

“It actually wouldn’t be. They’re super safe,” she says. The boys throw their hands in the air in defeat, and Sierra scrolls down to show them details. The Utah reactor was made for students, and it “could not, by its design, suffer from a meltdown”. Then Brian shows them the story of the murder back home near San Francisco. The hair stands up on the back of her neck. Elves rarely care what humans think is possible. Clay was right to be worried. Elves can metabolize radiation that will kill humans. A meltdown that makes even the safest research seem dangerous could be a useful attack. Screwing up Salt Lake City would also take out transit in the rest of the desert…

Sierra hears a series of metallic clanks behind her. She ignores it and hears Brian sigh. “You’re supposed to turn around. He’s trying to be dramatic,” Marin says softly. She turns. 

Brian’s holding something inside his red varsity jacket. “I know something about Utah too”. He takes his pistol from the inside pocket and pulls the hammer back. “The concealed carry laws here are really loose”. 

Clay has his head in his hands and is muttering to please put the safety back on that thing. They’re going on the offensive, apparently. 

During their six week pause, the small party managed to get all the weapons they could ever want. Nonetheless, even Utah’s “red state” gun laws don’t allow Clay to carry his concussion rifle across Salt Lake City, so the four of them all hide pistols and thin armor under jackets as they bolt across town. As expected for high-altitude desert, the air is cool this early in the morning. Sierra has a geiger counter on her belt and hooks her jury-rigged magic detector up to her cellphone. A few steps behind, Marin sends an urgent message to the Adusts and anyone nearby to help them avert a catastrophe.  

Brian speaks up. “So do the commoners really not care about any of this? Some of them definitely support conquest, but I’m getting the sense it’s controversial. Attacks like this are big”. 

“I wouldn’t be surprised if no one local was part of this. Commoners aren’t easy to organize”.

They slip past a barricade. Sierra and Brian hesitate to duck under the tape set up by oblivious police, but not Clay. “Because commoners manage their own affairs, right?”

“Right. That’s why we’ve only been facing noble soldiers. By Lazarus’s design, it’s difficult to coordinate law enforcement in the human world, and commoners are hard to convince”. They pull the masks over their faces that they packed in case of a plague. Smoke is bad to breathe too. “If a human government wants information on a criminal, what do they offer?”

“Money?” Sierra yells. There’s sirens everywhere, but the fire seems contained to one section of the building. 

“Exactly. Commoners mostly barter. There’s no way for the nobility to offer a bounty people want. If elves report us, it’s due to coercion or because they personally want us taken down”.   

They all go quiet as Marin teleports to the elven world to “go around” a locked door. It isn’t just the young Betrayed who have been taken from their homes in the human world. In Susanville, Vya, Shiprock, every town they’ve driven though, houses have been empty and elves have avoided eye contact. Their emissary claims the apex issued an order for elves in the human world to isolate, or leave the human world entirely. In their place, teams of assassins and operatives (apparently the Apex knows all of the best, because her husband used to be one) have moved in to kill and destabilize.  

And as they step through the heavy door into the type of grey university hallway Sierra knows well, it becomes clear that the quiet was the calm before the storm. She can hear distant gunshots, and the sound of elven weaponry firing. The fire sprinklers have activated, and they’re careful not to slip on the wet carpet and tile. In some places, water pools where the linoleum has been ripped up from the floor. Brian kicks one tile and yelps out loud. It’s as heavy as steel. Underneath, she can see empty boxes like the whole building had hidden treasure under the floorboards. They run past painted murals, presentation posters, and torn-up floors until they’re deep in the building. It’s easy to forget the fire somewhere nearby. The sounds of combat have only gotten closer. 

Then she sees a barricade made of overturned tables and those same ‘linoleum’ tiles. There’s movement behind it! Brian grabs Marin by both shoulders and shoves him to the ground. She sees green trails where his glowing eyes used to be, and a bullet, a real human bullet, passes through as they fade. She ducks as well and covers her ears. 

“We’re human and he elf is a friend! Don’t shoot!” Clay shouts with a hand on his own hidden pistol. 

A deep voice yells back from behind the barricade. “Green elves are never friendlies. She’s manipulating you!”

She’s. Marin has long hair, but Sierra guesses that assumption was based more on his emerald magic, staff, and the memory of his base-wrecking mother. 

“Emer Sondaica has been dead since June!” Clay yells back, trying something out. “Attacks have increased because the elves had a regime change! The one we’re with is on our side! Humanity’s side!”

A pause. “Stand up. Hands up. Get behind the barricade. If I see her eyes glowing I shoot”. They stand. 

Marin cracks his neck and lets his eyes go dark. “His eyes. Call me Marin”. 

They scramble over the damp ground and duck behind the makeshift wall. There’s three humans back here, then a locked door. The speaker looks middle-aged and holds a high-powered human rifle, and the other two are probably graduate students. One grad student (the only girl) looks at each of them in turn, then looks back out at no-man’s land (hallway). 

Her peer tilts his head. “Are you new first-years? How do you know about this?”

Sierra shakes her head “Nah. Elves tried to kill us in June. Been on a quest ever since”. She adds that they're on a gap year, as if that will make things clearer. 

Brian keeps talking. “We saw fire and decided to try and help. We’re trying to stop elves from conquering the world, you know”. 

The physicists look at eachother. 

“We don’t know, actually,” says the older man. “The Professor warned us over the summer to expect more attacks, but if he said anything else… well he said it to the department head, not me. This Emer Sondaica was the Green Queen?”

“What? Yes. Yes, she was. She led the attack at Project Excalibur ten years ago,” Marin explains. “But she was killed in June. The new Apex -queen of the elves- is actively trying to take over the world. I think Emer just had a grudge against physics”. 

The scientists talk amongst themselves. “We never thought they’d attack like this. Actual combat only happens at research centers. Excalibur, CERN, Lawrence-Livermore. But there was an assassination last night and a warning from the Professor so we decided to set a watch, just in case,” The younger man points behind them. “The plutonium is back there, behind a second set of guards”.

It’s madly courageous and won’t do anything if the elves decide to use charms. 

“So you’re faculty? Are there any elves here?” Clay asks.

They say there are a few elves scattered around, including one behind them in the main vault, but they’re mostly researchers, professors, and particularly dedicated graduate students. Thankfully, there weren’t any 8am classes this morning, so the building is free of students who don’t know the secret. 

“We’re hoping The Professor will save the day. He likes this place a lot, but word is there’s been attacks across the country. He’s probably busy at Berkeley or MIT or some other fancy school”.

“If The Professor used to be a royal, then it’s no surprise,” The woman adds. 

“He? Are we sure about that? It sounds like you’re describing someone I’ve heard of, except for that,” Sierra asks awkwardly. She had a theory that Cai Sondaica, Emer’s too-powerful, disgraced, twin was The Professor, and everything adds up, but that elf was never exactly a man.

“I’ve never met him. They say he has that elf look? Long hair, graceful, slender. Creepy pale eyes. Everyone calls him a guy though”. 

Ah. It’s the gender stereotypes. Cai Sondaica it is. 

Brian doesn’t blink. “Well, we have magical guns and an elf. Whatever The Professor can do, we can do”.

“I don’t think that’s right”. The woman shoots, then ducks back behind the barricade. Clay and Marin nod at each other and stand. The elf vaults over the shallow wall and engages an opponent. He lands a strike with a dagger, and Clay shoots the soldier in the chest with proper form until it falls. Then Marin spins and puts his quarterstaff around nothing. A second elf in tactical gear materializes, and Marin grapples it until both humans can shoot it down. Sierra looks closely at the body and sees wet indents in the carpet behind it. Did Marin notice the attack from just those footprints? 

 “Point taken”. The older scientist points them down the hall in the direction of the reactor. Clay emphasizes again that the green elves are fighting to defend humanity right now, though he’s lying. He also says that there may be two orange elves with freckles and that they’re allies too. The scientists send a message. Marin sends one as well to warn the Adust duo, just in case. As the group jumps back over the barricade, the woman mutters that Brian “looks just like that Governor’s cute son on Instagram”. He sighs so loud Sierra half-expects him to let the elves shoot. 

They walk in a triangle with Marin casting a spell of protection (shielding them from bullets and radiation) from the center. Clay hugs the right wall for cover, Brian takes the left, and Sierra listens to her geiger counter click from behind. The scientists let them through, and Marin, prince of the elves, effectively soaks up the fire. No soldier wants to be the one to kill the prince, but everyone wants to take him down. They push forward. It’s wet, miserable work, especially when the carpet is soaked with blood as well as water. How will the elves explain these deaths? In one place, the water sprinklers have stopped and water gushes through the wall instead. There are thin cracks running along the sides of the hallways. She looks up and imagines them spreading like a fractal until the ceiling caves in. 

Brian tries to use a tile as a shield, and keeps holding it even after it proves useless. Clay’s new body armor saves him from the blast of a concussion rifle, and Marin nearly makes a fatal mistake trying to send a bullet to the elven world. They’re underground now. That tactic is impossible. They test every door knob to see if it will burn, but it seems like the fire is somewhere far away. Are there spells to control fire? No one she’s heard of has specialized in anything elemental… except for the new Apex and her earthquakes. 

Marin puts an ear to the door. “I can hear elves talking, but I can’t really understand them. It might be Old Mercurali. There’s old Eight-Point nobility in here”. He’s referring to the noble alliance centered around Genus Mercuralis. Marin’s allies, the Lazarins, speak the mostly dead Old Lazarin, but their ancient enemies have a language too. 

“So what does that mean right now?” she asks. 

“It means don’t shoot anything vital. This is war, but things have been civil so far”. 

Clay and Brian look at her, and she looks back. Hopefully Marin ignores their disdain.

The lock is already broken and they enter invisibly with their guns raised, but it’s the control booth. A shattered rectangle where a window used to be separates them from the reactor room. She can see three soldiers standing around a small circular pool with red railings. They wear the same tactical armor with glowing veins as the  elves they killed in San Francisco on day one. They are all masked and faceless, but one has removed its leg armor to treat a wound, and the largest (seriously he has to be two meters tall) has a clearly kidnapped person slung over one broad shoulder. He doesn’t seem to mind the weight. The radioactive material is deep under the water. Three scientists are dead or unconscious on the ground. Without any warning or explanation, the giant turns to face them. 

Brian hesitates for half a second to check if he’s still invisible, then shoots first. The bullet hits the giant’s indigo glowing chestplate and ricochets right back. Everyone ducks, and Marin is so panicked that he leaves an after-image. The other two soldiers gasp in surprise. Crouched beneath the concrete wall, she compares their magical colors to the ones she knows. The new Apex’s oldest allies are the neon blue Tiercels and gold Eburos, but Marin’s mentioned lavender special ops as well. No one matches. She hears a voice so deep and accented it has to belong to the biggest elf. She understands Marin’s name and nothing else he says. 

Marin yells back, in English. (thanks!)  “Didn’t expect me? Well I didn’t expect a real Mercuralis either! I mean, how many of you are left of fighting age? Two, counting Her Eminence?”

“Three,” The Mercuralis says, and the ground shakes. Salt Lake City isn’t a seismically active area, right? It’s not like home, at least. This royal is going to bury the evidence under the rubble of Salt Lake City. 

“You should be thanking my cousin on your knees for not massacring your family like they did ours,” he continues. 

“Well, I’m not letting you destroy a city”.

Another soldier speaks. “Perfect! We’re not. We’re cutting out your aunt’s influence and brining down a few buildings. Now get lost before His Highness decides to ignore his cousin’s orders and kill you all”. 

In spite of everything or maybe because of it, Brian actually laughs. Marin shakes his head. 

“The big one is Kishar. He’s even younger than I am. If he dies, then it’s over. Ishtar Mercuralis will burn both worlds to ash”. 

Brian lowers his gun, but the rest of his posture becomes rigid instead of deflating “So what, we just leave? There’s dead bodies in the reactor room. We saw them. That goliath led a strike team to murder dozens of us and he’s still going to bring the whole campus down to cover his tracks”. 

“It’s a lot better than a meltdown”. Marin replies. Then Kishar says something else she can’t understand, and Marin doesn’t translate. This negotiation is for elven ears only. That doesn’t mean they can’t shout their disapproval.  The giant roars for Marin to shut his humans up.

He doesn’t, or at least it doesn’t work. Nonetheless, it’s a cease-fire. Marin stands, gives a single sharp nod through the used-to-be-window, and Kishar gestures with his massive gun. His other hand is on the bound person he’s kidnapping. Sierra holds Brian’s hand to keep him from punching their friend in the jaw. As they run out, patches of ceiling have begun to cave in from the fire above them. The barricades have all been abandoned, except for a few where a slumped body still keeps watch. They’re running on wet tile when the shaking starts, and despite a lifetime of earthquakes, Clay slips. Brian doesn’t waste a second pulling him to his feet. 

Outside, she thinks that the soldiers were lying. The reactor must have melted down, or done something magical and worse, because the world is nothing but acrid smoke and the dust of buildings. It sticks to their wet skin and clothes and chokes out the sun. They look like ghosts, and so do the survivors who gather outside the police tape. She hopes they aren’t on camera. 

Brian veers off into the dust, and they try to reel him back in until the rest of the group sees Zerada and Jezero standing uselessly at the edge of sight. Useless. Marin cares more about his ancient enemies than them and now they’re almost outnumbered by elves. Then Sierra’s phone calls. It’s her mother. 

She coughs before picking up. “Hey Mama”

“Oh good. Have you seen the news?” Her mother is panicked so rarely that she has trouble telling. 

Cai was occupied somewhere else. “Uh, there’s a lot going on. What specifically?” What does the exhaustion in her own voice sound like?

Her mama calls them terrorist attacks. Labs across the world have all but sunk into the earth. The one at Berkeley somehow kicked off a magnitude five earthquake, the biggest one they’d had at home all year (and the second caused by an elf). If Sierra had been in Massachusetts for college, then maybe she’d have been in the nuclear engineering lab, and then maybe she’d have been caught up in whatever happened that nearly caused a nuclear accident.

The scientists were right. Cai was helping out at a bigger, fancier, lab. MIT is safe, thanks to the ex-prince[ss]. She promises to stay safe, promises to call again soon, and hangs up the phone. She wants to tell the group the news, but the elves are talking too loudly about the unexpected Mercuralis boy for her to get a word in. 

Zerada has a perfect kiss mark of destroyed laboratory dust on one cheek. Brian’s arguing against the little ceasefire trick, but he’s also in her arms. 

“We’ve got to hold an intervention,” Clay whispers.

She opens an email to their emissary “For which one?”

“Brian? What, you want me to confront the elf prince?”

“You’d do a better job than me”. 

……………….

Real university nuclear reactors are nothing to be afraid of. They are extremely safe and important for both research and job training. Do not let my silly oc thing turn you against nuclear energy. At the same time, when Sierra says that the US detonated "eight or..." nuclear bombs in the Nevada desert, she isn't saying eight or nine. She's saying eight or nine hundred. The fallout drifted downwind and caused widespread radiation poisoning and cancer. In summary, safety first when dealing with magic rocks formed by the decay of particles themselves.

Kishar Mercuralis is second-cousins with Ishtar’s kids. He is eighty-two, equivalent to barely eighteen. He’s also six foot seven without combat boots and built like a truck. However, he doesn’t have Ishtar’s strange durability. In a fight without magic or weapons, even Brian might be able to win just by toughing it out for longer.

@lokiwaffles @reggie246 @wishndreamer

[erzivy]

headcanons for my favorite autisms (chrashley)

ash brown

- 19 during the game

- she/they, demigirl, super bi

- eldest of three sisters- her mother divorced and remarried so her younger stepsisters are ~9 and 6

- carpal tunnel in both hands. the gloves she wears ingame are actually just covering up pressure braces

- sleeps all day on saturday and sunday, wakes up and chugs a monster on monday, and doesn't close her eyes again for 72 hours

- always has a notebook and pen on her. she says it's for writing her ideas but really it's for when her and chris want to complain about the others when they have no cell signal

- hates being called ashley, prefers to be called ash all the time. chris was the first person to pick up on this and constantly polices everyone else about it like ash's own personal double time boyfriend-bodyguard

- warrior cats kid

- infodump autism. don't get her going on something she loves or she'll be talking about it for actual hours and forcing you to also consume the content

- really good at singing but you'll never know

- pinterest boarded the hell out of her future wedding and baby names when she was 12

chris hartley

- 19 during the game, almost 20

- one younger brother

- cisman, gender questioning. he/him for now. also ultra bi, asexual

- sensory seeking autism. his coat hood is fur lined bc he likes soft stuff

- has broken 15 pairs of glasses and almost the same amount of bones

- would have majored in comp sci if he went to college but he decided to work right out of high school

- codes stuff for his friends sometimes and has definitely built all their computers

- listener, not a talker. it's a good thing he's dating ash cause he can listen to her talk for hours without getting bored

- selective mutism

- is supposed to be wearing retainers to bed because he had braces in middle school but he's lost them so his teeth are crooked again

- horrible at shaving and always has nicks on his face

- falls asleep on every car ride no matter how long it is

- CRAZY clumsy. like how the hell does this guy fall so often

- NOT SKINNY. i swear to god if i see another person draw him skinny. he's got a lowkey dad bod with a little bit of practical muscle. very square shaped

[forthedancingandthethriving]

Cluster has been here for a... while. They don't get visitors, but honestly, they're.. okay with that. They've been here for a year, and they've had a ton of time to think.

And they know that they're wrong. They know what they did was wrong, and they understand that what they did can't be forgiven. Quite frankly, Cluster expects to never be forgiven.

They expect to rot in this solitary confinement cell for the rest of their life..

Until something grabs them.

They're dragged down, down down down, and then..

"Cluster!"

"Cookie?!"

Cluster stares in shock at Cookie, who is in their face and grinning like the cat that caught the canary.

"I told you," Cookie remarks smugly to.. something that clearly isn't cluster. "What did I say? He's still alive!"

"They're," Cluster corrected.

"Oh, sorry." Cookie shoots him a genuinely apologetic look before correcting herself, "they're still alive!"

"Who are you talking- whaaaaaaaaat the fuck." They look to where she's looking and their jaw drops. Cluster realizes some things in that moment.

One, they're in Computer Hell.

Two, they're a Program again.

Three..... what is absolutely an Eldritch entity is towering over them and Cookie and looking quite smug of itself.

Hello, Cluster, it greets them.

"Ah.... hel-hello?" They greet it nervously.

Cookie informed me that you could help me with a little.. pet project of mine. Whatever this thing is, it places its hands behind its back, looking down at them with purple eyes.

"Pet project..?" Cluster echoes.

"Basically," Cookie interjects, "this is the Abyss! The Beginning, you know."

They do not know, but they wisely decide to keep their mouth shut and nod. They recognize an Eldritch horror when they see one.

"And it wants to ask you some questions!" She clapped her hands together and Cluster sweats a bit.

They and Cookie had been on.. good terms, they supposed, before their whole.. Overwrite ordeal. But there's something about her smile that unsettles her.

Cookie told me that you hold.. access codes? The Abyss tilts its head.

Cluster feels their heart drop. Oh... oh, oh, no no no no.

Access codes. Access codes.

Every Program being had an access code. Since they were beings of pure code, an access code was essentially a way to.. control them. Infiltrate them. Cluster had been entrusted with everyone's access codes back when they were a part of the Adminspace. They don't remember the reason why, but they're pretty sure it's because they always did the whole 'ascending' stuff.

Against their better judgement, though, they nod. "Ah.. yeah. I.. I held the access codes. But not anymore. I got.. demoted to an NPC after an event last year. Even if you've made me a Program again, I don't have Admin authority. And they've no doubt changed my pin to get back into that server."

The Abyss hums. Cookie said the same thing. Your Admin statuses were.. revoked. Then, it smiles a smile that makes Cluster shiver. So we need someone with access, no?

Cluster and Cookie share a look. They both frown. "Do you.. have someone in mind?" Cookie asks with a raised eyebrow.

Cluster was mildly surprised that she actually seemed quite sane. Last he remembered, she was still thirsting over Byte..

The Abyss slowly begins to pace around the two, and Cluster takes a look around. They had never been in Computer Hell before, but they assume that this must be an unused layer, judging by all the open cells. But if they strain to listen, they swear they can hear commotion going on upstairs.

As the Abyss continues to think, they turn their head to murmur to Cookie, "so.. what exactly has been happening?"

"Oh! The Abyss has promised us all freedom if we agree to work with it to kill a bunch of people and all that!" Cookie giggles.

.. yup, still crazy, Cluster thinks.

As the thing finally stops pacing and snaps its fingers, it grins widely. Ah. I know who to use. Someone who is quite the loner, it'd be so easy to fool everyone, it chuckles. And would have access to Computer Hell, and no one would raise an eyebrow about a visit from time to time.

Cluster got the feeling they knew who the Abyss was thinking about. "You.. don't mean..?"

Cookie grins. "CPU? Oh, we're gonna use CPU? Wonderful, I've been meaning to get back at him for what he did to my legs."

They spare a glance to her back, and sure enough, there are nubs where her spider legs used to me. They look back to the Abyss, who is grinning at them.

Do you remember his access code? it asks.

They think. Their memory banks are fuzzy, and they're quite sure the Abyss did something wrong when making them a Program again, but they don't dwell on that. They've done stupid things, but even they know better than to piss of an Eldritch horror.

"5188174," Cluster reluctantly answers. "That's CPU's access code."

Wonderful, it muses. And judging by what I've seen, he's already got a little getaway planned for many people. So I'll give it some time, wait until he's got it aaaall set up. And then.. he's mine.

"What will you do with him afterwards?" Cookie asks as the Abyss turns and begins to walk away.

Well.. I don't particularly like him, he's too close to Abyssal for my liking.

Cluster furrows their brows. What did Abyssal have to do with this?

Sooo..

Cluster feels sick to their stomach as they the Abyss slowly turn its head whilst dragging it's finger.. before it's head snaps to an unnatural angle.

I'll assimilate him. :)

It walks. Come along now, it remarks with a chuckle. Let's introduce you to everyone, Cluster.

Cluster was still trying to regain their bearings as Cookie helped them to their feet and led them. She began to ramble on and on, but Cluster wasn't listening.

.... well, shit.

[aro-iceland]

not really a drawing request but id love to know more about your ocs??? from what you’ve posted they look amazing??

Thank you VERY much!!! i forgot how much i love to talk about them

(sorry for the old art or picrews, i am too excited to not talk about them and simultaneously not patient enough to redraw them)

All picrew links: Kit + Kevín + Lilly Annalise Piper + Cecily Mikael + Claire Princeton

here's a general overview of everything that exists:

-------------

part 1: em groups

you should at least be vaguely familiar with my em. every single au and whatever hetalia character i feel like grabbing for that day goes in there. interesting little tidbit that somehow hasn't come up so far is that in more human AUs of mine he's part irish! ~20% of icelandic males and 60% of females actually have irish/keltic ancestry!!! ireland being his mom hc is going WILD in me. he's also very magic because that headcanon singlehandedly started the ice obsession in me. how well in tune he is with it and how exactly it looks like depends on the au . i also make him closer friends with swe and fin because i can👍

(excerpt from my em content dedicated whatsapp group with just my (non-hetalia) best friend and me: )

le is there a lot because i love him so so much. incredibly phoenix coded man

there's also monaco, gwendolyn or gwenny to me. she's a permanent resident because i support women's rights (slaying) and wrongs (gambling addictions)

a notable not fully formed character is faroe islands! petra sometimes, emma other times. i genuinely don't know where those names come from. i heard the faroe islands and iceland being referred to as "kind of like twins" and as each othere's "best friends" *somewhere* and i am VERY normal about that too. oh SO normal

part 2: mikael's world

a fusion of 2 groups put into one world, connected by one flimsy tie. it's mostly analogous to real life but no homophobia👍

Group A: Pentagon

Mikael started out as a swedish micronation oc but we don't talk about that. he has a chicken called omelette because of inside jokes during... my wattpad era... shudders. i project onto him a lot and lots of his design is just wish fullfillment. while i love my ocs suffering and angst, because i put so much of myself in him, ultimately, his story is one of healing. major point of difference between us though is that his parents abandoned him and mine... didn't.do.that. 💀👍

Claire and Piper both actually started out as minecraft skins i made for fun!! and then i made them kith:3

Cecily and Kit were added becaue i felt like something was missing to complete the friendgroup!

Group B: menace club

Kevín and Lilly are my ACNL and ACNH side accounts...... and Annalise was some pretty trans woman i drew one day there's nothing much to this

Part 3: D&D

so.. confession: i haven't actually played d&d yet! but my friends love it a lot, i love a couple ttrpg podcasts so.. yeah i have a couple concepts!

The Leighlar Pilayden, or blueberry bitchfuck as i like to call him, Half Elf sorcerer who was abandoned as a babg and raised in a cult which, in a world with multiple deities, somehow ended up believing in the *one* that doesn't exist! he's a sorcerer but they all think his powers a blessing from their god

MY BABY MY SOBBING WET CAT SON! PRINCETON INTEKONA!!!

TIEFLING BARD I might get to play as him soon... negative strength, the only reason he has such a high charisma stat is because everyone pitties him... he accidentally ended up in a criminal gang... he plays the pan flute and bagpipes... pathetic baby

Part 4: Miscellaneous

All the Characters that are alone in their worlds!

(^aesthetic wise but he definitely kins larry)

Brian is the brain cell a friend and i are sharing and also the last one we have. he's a SOO overworked office worker. he has to handle EVERYTHING he's so exhausted please give him a break. he recently got a boyfriend. good for my him

Recently re-named Ailbhe used to be Avery and is a genderless, fully white skinned(as in colour not the skin colour we associate with the word. imagine porcelaine!) and neon yellow haired fallen angel/ex-demi-god!! not much lore but... lots of potential!!

Firenze is... idk he just happened in one history lesson in 2018 and now he's here. bunny boy with lots of responsibilities around the palace!!!

-------------

and ... phew. i THINK that's it? mostly? oh my god. if. there's anyone you wanna know more about... tell ME

[sumarmzthesadseal]

I'm feeling emo so I'm gonna list things I rlly like so I remember life is very snazzy everyone pay attention bc I am always right so everything I like must be amazing

-Roses in bodies of water like omgggg especially like pink toned red roses with fairly lights in lakes aughhhh help

-Vanilla icecream when it has those little black bits omg

-my crush bc they're so cute and pretty and I want to hold her hand

-Those friendship bracelets that are the shade of each friends eyes like that's so cute stop I'm gonna combust

-Waterstones. Like I moved a while ago so I haven't been to waterstones yet but it's so ethereal it's literally got a cafe attached to it and it's so pretty

-my iMedia coursework, like slay me I ate on that did so good I got the best score in both the year 10 and year 11 classes 🙏🙏

-My epic freunds I've only known them for like 5 months but I'm the happiest I've ever been with them they're the only people who I'm 100% myself with it's so freeing

-This specific lip gloss that i do not own but its like drop desd gorgeous and only about 6 quid on yesstyle (I will probably never buy it anyway)

- jet black hair/dark hair in general. Just propose to me atp

-Those jelly crystal things they look like they have the peeeerfect texture and one thing about me is I crave textures not taste and I've been craving that texture my whole life

-My new friend who texts like the Snapchat ai he's so goofy

-Lin Manuel Miranda

-Musicalssss

-specifically hamilton

-My zesty English teacher whose so millenial coded, wants pet snails, "has no shame" (he said that himself) and let's me and my mate harass him after class

-My iMedia, Business and tutor teacher whose literally my mom guys she breeds dogs and she has a pet dog called Gilly who looks like a human and her daughters a lesbian too and said daughter helped me with my iMedia work 💔💔💔

-My ugly ass birds

-Black cats

-Handmade gifts, I have a bunch (three) of crochet gifts that I do absolutely nothing with but I refuse to let anyone touch it because and keep them all pretty and neat bc someone made that for me

-PINKKKK

-pink again I live pink

-Marina as in Marina and the Diamonds

-Mitski

-People enjoying my baking

-People enjoying my art

-People who enjoy me

-My little cousins who I see as little brothers and mean the world to me like if I kms whose gonna be there for them 🤨🤨

-When my crush sends me audios/videos of them speaking or singing or whatever (I could listen to them for hours on end) I'm literally shaking as I write this guys oh my god I love her

-My history teacher whose always insulting me like omg leave me alone you little rat maybe she should be nicer to her best student 🙄

-Brain rot humour

-Pretty skies

-Buying new books

-Drawing

-Lesbians <3333

-My crush again

-the person who I think of every day (this is not an exaggeration)

-the person I have romantic attraction to

-the person who I'd throw away my whole life and family for

-the person whose the only person I've ever loved

-the person who wasn't my FIRST love (if you can class that as love lmao) but was my first LOVE

-the person who doesn't like physical touch but still hugs me even if rarely

-the person who I'm drifting apart from despite my feelings starting to consume every nerve every cell every part of my body

-the person who I planned a future with

-the person I've known for years but I only clocked my feelings in October 2022 (girl in red ref??)

-the person who I'd rather never speak to again over hurting them by confessing

-the person I adore

-did I mention my crush

-guys im actually cooked

[bonefall]

Leopardstar my detested

She has so much promise in TPB and TNP. Ambitious, confident, never lets go of a grudge. May do you a favor... but only if it could benefit her in the long run. She's serious, well-spoken, and intimidating.

What sliver of conscious she possessed lead to her choosing Mistyfoot as a deputy as an 'apology'. The rest of her picked Hawkfrost as deputy in her absence; breaking the code by choosing a cat who had no apprentice, young and aggressive, who wants war with other clans.

It could have set up RiverClan to always be teetering between slipping back into the dark ages, and moving foward into cooperation. Leopardstar was originally a very morally gray character; cared about what she wanted above the law of the clans, or the peace between them... but not completely heartless either.

But that's not what we got, of course

Because the narrative needs to make it that ONLY Tigerstar was a Truly Evil Villain, Blackstar is made into an idiot who can't tell that he's constantly being duped, and Leopardstar loses her brain cells to ignore every warning sign. They're completely stripped of their agency, boiled down into sad sack characters who Really Did Love Their Clans and their greatest "crimes" are caused by someone else.

And that's almost insulting for Leopardstar, who's just one accidental border crossing away from starting an actual war with ThunderClan at the beginning of TNP, but 'graciously' allows WindClan to drink from her river. The same cat who later lets her clan throw Stormfur and Brook out because of a fake sign, while never stepping in when Hawkfrost undermines Mistyfoot's authority. A bad bitch, not the crying loser who sacrificed 1 of 9 lives to a fox because she's sooo sorry she let a guy try to murder two children