#Everytime she shows up with the other characters on part 3

[jensthwa]

we can't be friends (CS x reader).

part of the love's an uncharted path universe ★.

SUMMARY:

San is your first love. He broke your heart and played with your feelings without even kissing you back when you two were in highschool. Now, many years later, you do your best to avoid crossing paths with him because there's just no way you could ever hate him, but there's also no way you two can be friends again. But his best friend is also one of your best friends, so there's only so much you can do to avoid San when he arranges a dinner you're forced to go to.

PAIRING: first love!choi san x afab reader.

GENRE: one shot (fluff, angst, smut)

WORD COUNT: 20k (yikes).

WARNINGS: SMUT ☽ (MINORS DNI) attempt !!! at comedy, unnecesary pinning, a looot of context, bad friends :(, some arguing, tension, drinking and drunk behavior, tears, making out, description of female anatomy, oral (f reciving), fingering, love making, pet names (babe, baby), flirty seonghwa, wooyoung being a little shit again but also a genius, gyuri almost commiting a crime.

NOTES: hi everyone! this is a lenghty one, i know, but trust me when I say the context is necessary to understand what reader goes through with san. also, some of this may or may not have happened to me (have fun figuring out which part) (it's quite obvious tbh). THIS IS PART OF THE SHOW AND TELL UNIVERSE BUT CAN BE READ AS A STAND ALONE, even though there's some references and characters that you can only know if you read s&t lol. this is 100% self indulgent, as all fics should be, and i think i've re-read it so many times that if you find a typo or something that just doesn't make sense, you can blame it on english not being my first language i guess lmao. i hope you enjoy it and if you do feel free to send/reblog/type in any feedback or thoughts! <3

POSTED: august 06 2024.

permanent taglist: @hotteokkay, @potatomountain, @fairylover68

masterlist.

You and Choi San go way back. 

Well, it's nine years way back? You were only fourteen when you first saw him. 

He moved back to your area of the city a year after you moved from an entirely different one. You thought you knew every school secret there ever was, provided by your new best friend, Gyuri, but she didn't tell you about him at all. 

She claimed that it was because he didn't cause any stir the years they studied together before and after spending a whole first period in your eighth grade classroom with him at the back of the class, silently taking notes, you couldn't phantom why.

He was great at every subject, seemed to have a lot of popular friends and was, overall, a pretty nice guy. He was also very cute, skinny but you could tell he was the kind of guy who played a sport outside of school hours and he had a cute pair of dimples that showed everytime you scanned the classroom just to lay eyes on him. 

Choi San was a perfect boy to crush on, even a perfect guy just to have as eye candy during recess. You felt really strongly about him, not really forming a full opinion although your gut told you right away you were right. There was something about him… but you only figured that something until later, next year, starting your ninth grade. 

Gyuri and you were avid readers. Precocious girls, with minds way above your age. All your teachers praised came laced with the same compliment so you both decided that was the truth. You rejoiced in it, thinking you shared things in common with the grown ups and decided that that was the key to feeling a little superior in comparison to the rest of your classmates, who neither of you liked very much. 

Until they all decided to start dating each other and you two realized you were nothing but two kids with great imaginations and a love for school, praise and fictional men that couldn't be translated to the real world without sounding delusional and weird. 

So you decided to do something about it. And so, on a random Tuesday recess, you two scanned the crowd trying to find two boys (or a boy and a girl, because you always knew you liked girls too) worthy of your affections. One for her, one for you. Bonus points if the two of them were also best friends, of course. 

Double dates were all the buzz at the time anyways. 

Besides, only then they could understand the bond you and Gyuri had. Sisterhood like no other, nevermind Gyuri actually had an older sister and a niece at the ripe age of fifteen. 

And so when your index finger scanned the crowd and eliminated at least three potential crushes before landing on Choi San, you felt like it was meant to be. 

You see, his best friend, Jung Wooyoung, was perfect for Gyuri to crush on. He was almost as tall as she was at the time and his easy, outgoing personality was compatible with her book crush at the time as well. 

He also flirted with her on several occasions before that. 

So it was meant to be. 

Choi San, on the other hand, had never even glanced in your direction before. 

Just like your book crush did before he fell in love with the main character. 

See? Meant. To. Be. 

It was decided then that, although Choi San was not going to be your first crush ever, he was going to be the guy that motivated you to be at school for the time being, because math gets really boring after trying and failing at least ten times. 

You thought nothing of it when it felt a little forced, when you couldn't blush at all at the sight of him and you gathered that it didn't need to happen like in the books you read. You simply needed to say his name when someone asked you if you had a crush on anyone and that was enough to be in symphony with the rest of your classmates. 

Your longing glances were caught once or twice by him and you brushed the weird flip your stomach did everytime he looked away, blushing a little. You never really cared when it happened, really, knowing his crowd and your crowd (Gyuri and you) would never even cross paths in the first place. 

You two kept to yourselves and your little book unofficial book club, sitting on the floor at lunch time and cursing everyone who dared to call you weird for it. San and Wooyoung had a crowd of people at the loudest table laughing with them over stupid teen jokes and, uh, sports? You didn't even know. 

And then the unimaginable happened. 

Jung Wooyoung sat down, criss cross applesauce and everything, in front of you on a random Monday afternoon while you and Gyuri discussed the english assignment due next period. 

Gyuri was not too excited about that. 

Turns out, the only one excited to have a crush at school was you. She was very much still in the Lonely Hearts Club phase while you skipped all the way to your The Notebook phase and she was, in her own words, too afraid to admit it when you came up with your crush plan. 

You forgave her, of course, and decided to wait for her as long as needed because you were certainly not about to be an individual and have a crush on your own. 

And by the time Wooyoung smiled at you both and introduced himself to you, like you weren't in the same class for a year already, you thought your pretend crush on his best friend evaporated and joined the void superficial and fleeting interests you had. 

But then Choi San sat beside him, his knee brushing against yours in the process, and you knew you would have to issue a formal apology to your best and only friend for leaving her behind on this little thing. 

Because, oh boy, were you crushing on Choi San. 

You felt the blush rush to your cheeks and then fell silent while your friend and his friend discussed Fifty Shades of Grey for some reason you never cared enough to discover and you knew you were done for.

It was the first time seeing his dimples in full action, so close to you, so you completely stopped functioning all together. Amazing. 

When you decided to have a crush, you never took into account that you were, actually, quite shy. And he really wasn't, but you noticed that he knew when to talk and what to say and with your friend being a lot more outgoing that you were it gave you the comfort that she would speak for the both of you while you admired from the sidelines as your little duo became a group of friends you still miss deeply to this day. 

He was funny and you laughed at your jokes even though you pretended to be tired and completely worn out by the school day, resting your head on Gyuri’s shoulder and stealing glances at the boy while she kept arguing with his best friend. 

Wooyoung was popular and liked enough to have a few people sit with you later that week, people who never even knew you existed before that. They were good friends with San as well, so you tried your best to keep up with everyone until she sat down next to you one day. 

Arin was not really a bad person. She just was a bit conceited, calling herself princess type of conceited and you never really related to her even if she was nice to you to your face. She was absolutely gorgeous and, you found out with Wooyoung’s arm around your shoulder and a whisper to your ear, she had been San’s crush since they were both in elementary school. 

That would explain the sudden tension at the table when she sat down next to you, said hello to everyone, offered you a sweet she just bought from the cafeteria, and stared at San for the remainder of lunch time. 

You also noticed Wooyoung glaring at her a little and he later explained to you that he didn't really like her all that much. She loved attention and San gave her attention, so she would intentionally flirt with him to get her ego stroked in return. 

It didn't really matter how he felt about the girl, though, he didn't have to like her just because his best friend did. And when you caught her batting her eyelashes at San, you knew you didn't even stand a chance.

You tried to hide the disappointed look on your face but both Gyuri and Wooyoung looked at you while the two of them flirted endlessly for the remainder of lunch time and you figured you were doing a pretty shitty job at it. He didn't glance at you once either way, so it didn't really matter. 

Arin did but she just complimented your eyes and then started a conversation with someone across the table, her annoying sweet and fake voice making your right ear ring in disapproval. 

Either way, you ended up becoming her friend. Gyuri was not very fond of her and neither were you, but you all went to the bathroom together, did your makeup together, did school projects together and then sat everyday at lunch together with the rest of the guys who were, in one way or another, trying to get her to like them. 

Because, once again, she was a sight for sore eyes. 

It wasn't until later, in the middle of the year, that one of them did. Not Choi San, but Choi Yeonjun. 

You remember the day you found out they were together and the gut wrenching concern you felt when you found out that San was not at school that day. 

It was after summer break, you remember Wooyoung telling you that San and his family took a few more days of vacation and if you couldn't believe your eyes when you saw the new couple sharing a sweet kiss at the designated lunch table, you could only imagine how San felt the next day when he saw the same image right in front of him. 

Yeonjun was his friend, right? He knew about his crush and decided to get together with her anyways. Surely, San was devastated. 

But he wasn't. He just cheered them on and then laughed along when Yeonjun shoved his arm playfully after the hollering. 

But you saw through it. 

Your crush on San made you observant. Made you believe you knew him better than everyone else and so, after lunch, you took out your phone and pulled up the notes app. Writing a simple “are you okay?” in it and passing it to him the next second, you were surprised with yourself before you saw him frown a bit. And then he understood what you meant. 

Nodding, he passed you the phone back, before giving you a reassuring smile that you treasured in your heart and saw in your dreams. 

You didn't believe him, though, but stayed close enough to everything related to the situation to hold Arin in your arms when Yeonjun inevitably broke her heart. 

Starting your tenth year, he moved back to his city and decided to play the I thought we weren't even that serious card on her. Which was nasty, considering love it's very, very serious for a sixteen year old girl. 

By this point, you were all a little family and hanging out after school and on the weekends was not unusual, so it didn't surprise you when Arin invited you, and only you, to her house after choir practice on a Thursday. 

She lent you her older sister’s clothes to wear (because her's would never fit you. Her words, not yours) and took you to a walk in the park just to break your heart for the first time ever. 

“You know… I thought love was something I couldn't find in highschool anymore. But San it's really making an effort, you know? He's been there for me ever since Yeonjun left and… Well, I think he's going to ask me to be his girlfriend tomorrow.” 

Grasping the park bench she forced you to sit at, you only nodded and let out a shuddering breath that gave away what she was trying to figure out since earlier that day. 

“I'll say yes but only if you say it's okay to do so.” 

Arin was not really your friend, the same way Yeonjun was not really San’s friend. 

Because there's no way you would ever be okay with it. 

And yet, you tried your best to give her a smile and pretend the sound of your heart breaking didn't bring tears to your eyes “Of course it's okay. Why wouldn't it be?” 

A week later, they were officially dating. The rumors spread around like a wildfire and it took out of you with everyone calling San a nasty rebound and you doing your best to prioritize the ghost of the friendship you had with him. That whole fiasco lasted a few months. 

Months in which your friendship with everyone just grew stronger. Gyuri was still your best friend, Wooyoung was crushing on her hard and everyone knew, Arin and San were a steady couple, a new girl joined your class that year, named Yeri, and the principal assigned her to you because she thought you two would get along really well. 

“I like girls,” was like, the third thing she ever told you while you were showing her the school “I'm just telling you now because I don't plan on hiding it and you are wearing a pride pin.” 

“Oh, that's cool. I like girls too,” you smiled, looking at your pride pin “I didn't hide it either and no one gave me shit about it, so, don't worry.” 

Yeri also liked the mainstream music that you liked and soon she became a new addition to your group. And with Arin spending all of her free time with San, you, Gyuri and Yeri only grew closer and closer. You didn't have Arin’s voice in your ear telling you the million reasons she found Yeri uncool, but you saw it in her face every time the table laughed at one of Yeri’s jokes. 

And so, it went on for a while: 

Your mom driving all of you around in her car to the beach, to dinner, to the movies and letting you have mixed sleepovers at your house (meaning you, Arin, Gyuri, Wooyoung, Yeri and San) was fun and all, but it was not enough to distract yourself entirely. Everytime you glanced at the couple, that sinking feeling in your chest would appear and sulk your whole mood for, at least, fifteen minutes.  

Fifteen minutes of pretending you were okay with them before forgetting completely for an hour or so and then the cycle would repeat until you were alone staring at the ceiling and doing your best to not cry about it.

All it took was your first kiss being Yeri of all people for you to decide that it was time to retire your crush for Choi San once and for all. 

And for a while, it all went according to plan. You decided to tell Gyuri that it was okay because he was your friend first and the guy that you liked second and that you were not fourteen and desperate for love anymore, that it was time to go on with your life as if nothing really happened in the first place. 

You were hooking up with Yeri anyways, so it seemed like you were doing just fine. 

You grew closer to San as well and even though he mostly talked to you about Arin and whatever tantrum she was throwing at the time, you really started to feel some sense of normalcy within you when it came to just speaking to him. 

You no longer blushed when he made you laugh, you no longer looked at him with the longing of a past life lover and you were really happy for him because, at the end of the day, he was really happy with his relationship. 

Until winter break came around and Arin decided to give San his first heartbreak ever. 

She decided to call for a break in their relationship because she was, in his words, too overwhelmed with the amount of love and attention she was getting from him. 

Which was completely fucking insane considering the fact she forced him to save her contact as Princess Arin and all. 

So naturally, you sided with him. And she didn't take it to heart because everyone knew you liked San anyways. 

She told you the news herself through Facebook after asking you to explain to her the English assignment due next day and then she decided to tell you something you'll never understand because you no longer are on speaking terms with her: 

Princess Arin: u know i broke up with him because of u right? :) 

Princess Arin: one day I'll tell u all abt it. 

She never told you anything about it. And by then, you were starting your last year and San was your best friend who hung out with you everyday after school, calling you late at night and helping you with assignments through Skype. So you didn't really care. 

And as the day passed, you started understanding the connection they talked about in books and movies. You thought you did before, Gyuri being your eternal person in this world, but it felt so different with San. 

Different and good. Different and achy enough for you to want to keep it in your life. 

Your dynamic was friendly, sure, but it was alright. It consisted of banter and daring stares as well as laughter and soft moments you treasured till this day. 

“It's way too early to be this annoying, Choi San.” 

“Oh, you think this is me being annoying?”

You both got an hour of detention for disturbing the class that day. 

You loved it. 

But then, after almost a month of picking up the broken pieces of his heart one by one, and your mother giving him a self-help book to make him regain the confidence he lost during the breakup process, you realized that you were in love with him and there was nothing you could do about that. 

You noticed one friday afternoon, when he offered to pay for your and your mom's ice cream at the drive through, when he scrambled to get all the change he had on him to leave a tip for the person who handed you guys the sweet treat, that there was no way you didn't love him. 

And it was confusing as fuck when everyone else started to tell you he had feelings for you as well. 

“Think about it. You text each other good morning everyday” Yeri listed with her finger and you nodded “Then, you go to school, sit together and spend the rest of the day together” another nod “Then after school you either go get ice cream together or hang out for a bit with your mom while she drives him home. And after that, you get on Skype for the reminder of the afternoon and then he calls you on your house phone and you two spend the rest of the night talking before falling asleep on the line together,” she looked at you like you were insane for even denying the accusations made against San, but she continued anyway “And then it's rinse and repeat and it has been that way since… What? Three months ago?” 

You nodded again, defeated. 

“Girl, he likes you.” she sighed, annoyed and a little tired, before sitting on your lap and kissing your lips affectionately “And you're here making out with me instead of him. You really are a lost cause.”

That didn't stop you from hooking up with her until she found a girl who's heart was not reserved for someone else, though. Said girl went to a different school and was a year younger than all of you, but she looked very happy and stopped secretly kissing you in the school bathroom like a week after they met. 

And when she finally told everyone, you were really happy for her, but San not so much. 

It was the night you thought everything was about to change. The night you thought he was about to kiss you or you were about to kiss him, whatever happened first. 

Laying in your bed, facing each other in the dim light, he thought it was the biggest form of betrayal and pouted the whole time he explained to you why. 

He thought you liked her and you realized he didn't really pay attention to you after all. Not the way you did with him. 

Bless his heart. 

You didn't kiss him that night because he wouldn't shut up about you and Yeri. 

“I mean, why couldn't it be you? She clearly liked you if you two were hooking up for over a year” and when his hand came to rest on your back, under your shirt, you breath hitched enough for him to notice it but not enough for him to just don't do anything about it except trace the curve of your silhouette with the pad of his thumb “I don't understand why anyone would pass the opportunity to be with you.” 

Huh. Maybe he did have feelings for you. 

No. He's just being a great best friend. Don't take that for granted. 

But it was impossible for you not to take Yeri’s words seriously as time went on. 

You didn't want to think he was giving you mixed signals, but yet again there was that one time when you reached behind your passenger seat in your mothers car to pinch his leg playfully after he pulled on your hair a little bit from behind, only to end up holding his hand the rest of the car trip to his house. 

His fingers slowly caressing the back of your hand were just too much for you not to get everything mixed up. 

Or that other time when your school held a Woman's Day event, and your class president decided that all the boys in the class were going to give roses to the girls.

When it was your turn to get a rose, you knew no one would give you one. But Yeri stood in line and collected a rose from the bin before the class president had the opportunity to say anything else. 

“I'll take that, thank you very much.” She turned to you, smiling. San blocked her way to you a second after. 

“And just what do you think you're doing?” 

“Giving my best girl a rose, of course.” She peeked around him, giving you a wink that you could only roll your eyes to. 

San turned to you, the fondness in his eyes making you question the decision of not pretending to be sick that day. It was too much for you to handle. 

“To the back of the line, then. I already called dibs on her,” he turned to your friend, snatching the rose from her hand in one swift move “I'll take that, thank you very much.” 

He had no idea what that meant to you back then. It was true that, at school, he behaved a little differently than when you two were alone. 

He was athletic, so he had some friends that you were sure used to ask him what the fuck was he doing wasting his time with a girl like you instead of getting a new girlfriend. 

He had a family that didn't approve of yours, too. You felt it the first time you met his mom and, even though she was nice to you and your mom, you could feel the judgemental stare she gave both of you when your mom told her she was a single parent. 

San told you that it didn't really matter, that his mom didn't have to like you because you weren't her friend, you were his. 

He played with your feelings a little too well. Wanting him, adoring him and letting yourself be consumed by the thought of him loving you back was enough to keep it going. To ignore the fluttering way your heart kept beating whenever he talked to you which was all the time. 

You assumed the way he behaved with you in private was the real him. The one who didn't care about appearances or his family approval. 

The one who cared about you. 

It was dizzying and fantastic and you thought he just might've been the love of your life. 

But then he would tell you how much it hurted when he saw Arin at school and how much he missed her, the intimacy they shared before, and reality would come crashing down and setting your delusions on fire again. 

He had sex with Arin. You would never stand a chance. 

Or so you thought he did. Except when you overheard Arin speaking to her friends and that was the first time you ever got mad at Choi San.

“And, you know, me and San were never intimate like that so I wouldn't know but I think boys have no idea how to please a woman if they tried to.” 

What? 

Oh. So he lied to you. 

And you were so upset by the thought of him making up stories of their intimate time together that it didn't even cross your mind that Arin might've been lying to save face. 

So when he came back from the bathroom and sat at his usual desk in front of you, you didn't even think about his feelings when you decided to treat him like shit for lying about something so important like sex to your face. 

“Leave me alone, San! I don't want to fucking talk to you right now!” 

The hurt expression he gave you after that is one you would never be able to forget. 

But you grew to be stubborn and a little overprotective of your own feelings, so you thought him playing the part of your best friend all these months and sweet talking to you was just another one of his lies. 

“You guys not being friends right now doesn't make any fucking sense, sweetheart.” Wooyoung's tone is careful and laced with affection, but you knew he was playing the devil's advocate on behalf of San. With his arm around Gyuri’s shoulder (by that point, they were a thing for over two months) you could swear you saw him smirk when the nickname brought a scowl to your face. 

He might've been worried, but he was also a little shit. 

“You really are going to let Arin ruin what you two have?” Your best friend was, of course, on your side. But she was your best friend for a reason and her love included pointing out when you were behaving like an infant at the age of seventeen and a half. 

“You two are practically dating and you're going to let the evil ex-girlfriend get in the way? Over something you weren't even supposed to hear in the first place? Come on.” 

Again, Wooyoung was a little shit. And you were so upset about everything that you shyness couldn't even help the fury behind your reply: 

“Stop saying that! We are not practically dating, he's in love with Arin and I'm not sure I even like him like that anymore!” Getting tired of everyone and their mother (your mother) feeding your delusions, you came to the conclusion that putting a stop to your friendship with Choi San was for the best. 

And, in doing so, you ended up breaking your own heart for the second time in your life. 

But he didn't put up an easy fight at all. You remember the feeling of pure joy when he grabbed your hand on the way to the cafeteria one day, pulling you so hard you almost ended up sitting in his lap, and the way his pleading eyes begged you to listen to him one last time. 

“Us not being friends doesn't feel right, Y/N…” he said and the word he used to categorize what both of you had hurted you, but you pushed the feeling away “Please, let's not fight anymore. I don't even know what happened, but I forgive you for yelling at me and I hope you forgive me for whatever it is you think I did.” 

Of course, you forgave him the next second without thinking too much about it. And for a while, everything went back to normal. You Skyped as usual and occasionally you let your other friends join the call even though it didn't really feel like it used to before. 

The next thing you knew, your feelings were in full bloom again and when you realized it, it was too late. 

Because by then, you had already let your childhood friend, Sunhee, join a few Skype calls and by the fourth one she invited her friend, Minseo, to them as well. 

Terrible, terrible mistake. Because even through the screen, you could see that Minseo looked a lot like Arin with the added bonus that she was down to earth and cool and liked the same things San liked.

You liked the same things San liked as well, but it never seemed to matter. 

Because not even two months after you decided to stop talking to San over a lie you weren't supposed to find out in the first place and then became friends one more time, he gets together with Minseo and you're sick to your stomach all over again. 

You hated her. Not because she was, suddenly, his girlfriend (not girlfriend girlfriend, but in a friends with benefits arrangement you never even knew why he agreed on in the first place) but because suddlenly she was so fucking obnoxious and didn't seem to like you either. 

Was it not painfully obvious San didn't have feelings for you? Why was she mad at you then? You literally brought them together! 

And all you got in return was her telling him she didn't feel comfortable with him having a girl best friend. That ungrateful bitch. 

He stopped calling. He stopped texting, he stopped carpooling with you and your mom after school and he stopped caring whether your math assignment was done or not. 

He stared pulling away more and more and it didn't matter how hard you tried to get him to talk to you, it seemed like he never really fucking cared about you in the first place. 

And by may that year, you didn't speak to San anymore. Granted, the only person he did speak to was Wooyoung, but even their friendship was falling apart. 

For the first time ever, San broke your heart firsthand. And it felt really, really fucking bad. 

You cried to your mom about it, she reminded you that you were nothing but a great friend to him and that, if he didn't take the time to appreciate that, that was his loss not yours. 

And she started hating him from that moment on. But you couldn't hate San, not even a little bit. 

Why would you hate him for not liking you back? For not loving you the way you loved hi— 

Your laptop closes down right in front of you and when you try to look up to find out who's responsible for interrupting your writing time, you get interrupted again. 

“Ouch! What the fuck, Gyuri?” the slap to the back of your head is quick and fill with rage. 

“What the fuck are you even writing. I can read from here, you know?” 

“I'm just laying my feelings down and— Ouch! Stop that!” You try to hit her back but she turns away quickly when your hands almost knock her coffee mug out of hers. 

“You can't possibly still have love for San, Y/N. It's been years.”

It's been four and a half, to be precise. But who's counting, right? 

“And why are you writing it in third person? You don't usually do that.” 

“I don't really know, Gyuri!” 

“I’m telling you, this celebratory dinner bullshit it's affecting you way more than it should,” she sighs, plopping down on the couch of your shared living room, and you leave your seat at the table to join her “He might not even show up. He has that thing with Kyungmi.” 

Kyungmi. 

You couldn't get to that part on your open document, but San left Minseo when he met Kyungmi at one of the frat parties they love to attend. Wooyoung told you that he said that it was love at first sight and you even met her briefly when you picked Gyuri up from the apartment he and San got when they started college together. 

She’s gorgeous and doesn't look like Arin or Minseo at all. It’s a different type of gorgeous. She's a year older than San and went to the same school as them and Gyuri. 

You think you might even like her better than him. 

You tried to be happy for San when you found out, but you two barely even speak a word to each other and you convinced yourself a while ago that you couldn't care less if he sees right through you and your fake smiles. 

You gathered, after everything happened, that San knew you liked him and took advantage of that. Unintentionally, but he did anyway. 

You sigh, resting your head on your best friend's shoulder. “It’s his best friend's celebratory dinner, though, he needs to be there.” 

Two seconds pass and then you both say it at the same time: “He’s in love.” 

And when San is in love, he has a one track mind with the name of his lover as the goal. 

You nod, but you can't help but to be insistent “It's Wooyoung's celebratory dinner, he needs to show up, right?” 

“I might not even show up, he's a pain in the ass.” She replies but you can tell her annoyance is not genuine and it makes you smile. 

Gyuri and Wooyoung broke up towards the end of your first year of college but you all stayed close friends. A one year relationship was not enough to fuck up the friendship they had and they decided to stay civil until, eventually, they became close friends again. 

To this day, you wonder why you and San couldn't rekindle your friendship when it became clear to you that you missed your friend and not the guy that you liked. 

Because San was always your friend first and your first love second. 

But it doesn't really matter anymore, because Gyuri is forcing you to shower and reminding you that you two need to keep Wooyoung on his best behavior tonight. 

“That girl he used to like before me is going, he said. I looked her up, she's single and he needs to get together with her because I can't take him whining about it anymore.” 

They keep things with each other way too civil, you think. 

“I'm telling you, if we don't show up he's going to do that thing where he gets drunk and makes a fool of himself. I can't have that, I'm on a mission.” 

“A mission to get your ex laid?” You ask, shampooing your hair. 

“A mission to get him a girlfriend so he can stop crying to me about feeling lonely.” 

“Maybe he wants you guys to—” The shower curtain opens and you see your best friend’s scowl before covering yourself up with your hands. 

“Gyuri!”

“Don't you dare say what you were about to say or I'm divorcing you.” 

You chuckle “Sure you are.”

You're left alone again with the water stream and she goes back to do her makeup “I told you back in ninth grade that we weren't a great fit and I was right. We can't get back together,” she sighs “It'll ruin everything.” 

“I doubt it will but you guys have been friends longer than you were boyfriend and girlfriend, so I'll just have to deal with my parents being divorced and civil.” 

“God, don't ever refer to us like that again— Oh! Speaking of parents,” you see her beam at her phone when you move the shower curtain to search for your towel and then she shows it to you “Mingi and Love just celebrated their one year anniversary!” 

Love being Mingi’s best friend. Gyuri talks to you about her college friend group all the time. The drama fuels your dinner conversations, you even follow a few of them on social media. 

“What does that have to do with parents?”

“They're the mom and dad of the group.” 

San is in that friend group, you can see him in the back of the picture and you recognize his apartment layout too. He's not the main focus of it but he's all you can see until you notice the couple sitting near him on the couch. 

The picture shows both of them, her in his lap and Mingi looking at her with stars in his eyes. 

Good for them. 

“Is that the girl he was friends with forever before they finally realized that they were in love?” 

“Yeah,” she sighs in contempt, looking down at the picture again “I was there the day it happened. I mean, not physically with them, but they left Yunho's party together and I told Wooyoung that it was finally about to happen!”

Gyuri is not a romantic person at all. Her excitement shows you that she really loves them and so you soften at the news that would usually give you and your dry love life a headache “It was the day before you called me to get you out of that awful date.” 

Ah, that also happened back then. You shudder at the memory.

“Tell them I say congrats, babe.” 

“I'm bringing you as my plus one.” 

You laugh, confused “To where?” 

“Their wedding, duh.” 

“They practically just got together,” you remind her, a year is not enough time to propose “And I don't really know them, Gyuri!” 

“They love you,” she assures you as you step out of the shower “I have been speaking about your antisocial ass for years. They can't wait to meet you.” 

“So you've been shit talking behind my back for years? Is that what I'm hearing?” 

She laughs “No, babe, that's Wooyoung's job.” 

Clearing your throat and looking at your friend through the mirror, you try to be as nonchalant as you can when you ask: “Has he… Did he tell you if…” 

“No, Y/N, I have no clue if San is going or not and Wooyoung is actually mad at him at the moment.” 

“Why?” 

She looks at you, sighing “He's been lacking as a friend lately.” 

“Hm.” 

“I hope you're not planning on swooning if you see him. Fuck him, Y/N.” 

“I know…” 

“And by fuck him I mean he doesn't deserve you or your forgiveness.” 

“He didn't do anything to me, Gyuri,” you remind her, shrugging “Not reciprocating my feelings is not a crime so I don't have to forgive him for anything.” 

You can practically feel her starting the San hate train engine, so you step out of the bathroom but her voice follows you. 

“And what about that time he ditched you for Minseo when you asked him to go with you to that medical appointment, huh?” 

“Cut it out, Gyuri…” 

But her head peaks around the corner, into the hall where you're rushing towards your room “Or that time when—” 

“Can't hear you!” Turning to look at her, she gives you an affectionate middle finger and heads back to the bathroom.

Closing the door, you lean into the thin wood and sigh, getting San’s face out of your mind so you can focus on getting ready and actually show up for Wooyoung and Wooyoung only. 

He just got a permanent position after completing his internship at a company that's your company's rival. He's going to crush you and steal clients from you but you are genuinely so happy for him. 

You should've guessed he enjoyed books as much as you did back in highschool. The debates he used to have with Gyuri were not all about flirting with her but also because he has a passion for books. 

And now he's going to work in the same field as you.

You're so proud of your friend. 

As you get ready, you remember the excitement cruising through your body when your boss trusted you enough to give you the first manuscript of a new client so you could edit it. You're sure Wooyoung is going to do better than you, taking into account that he actually went to college for this. 

You didn't. 

You met your boss at the part-time job you got in senior year, when you were trying to distract yourself from all the pain and the horrors of becoming a grown up. She was chatty, got a little too drunk on soju and told you she was starting her own book publishing company. 

When she returned months later after remembering that you told her you loved books and would love to work for as a publisher one day, she offered you a job in her company right after graduating highschool. 

You took it because you didn't think an opportunity like this would show up ever again. 

She was truly a blessing, the kind of person you never really believed in until she taught you all you needed to know about publishing and editing and encouraged you to take online classes during the nights so you could get, at least, a certification on what you do. 

You're proud of yourself too. The opportunity found you in a specific moment of your life where both your heart and your self esteem were destroyed and now you're not the person you used to be. 

Maybe that's why the possibility of facing San makes you so nervous. Collective memories are dangerous because the details never match the ones on the other person's head. 

You know who you were back then but… Are you the same person in San’s head? 

You don't even want to find out. 

Scanning your outfit in the mirror for the last time, you take the shoes you're wearing tonight out of your closet and walk over to the living room. 

Only to find Gyuri laying on the carpet under the coffee table, half dressed and on her phone. 

“You're going to mess up your hair.” 

“I don't care, I'm not going.” 

Sighing, you seat down on the couch and staring at the wood of the table covering her face. 

“What happened now?” 

“The bitch canceled!” 

“Wooyoung?” 

Poking her head out, she frowns at you “No, his first love.” 

“You were his first love.” 

“You know what I'm talking about, Y/N!” 

Laughing at her, you offer her your hand “Get dressed. Who cares if she's not going? He's not going to sulk because he's going to have you and his best friends there.” 

She whines like a child when you pull her up from the floor “I had a plan!” 

“Then make a new one, babe. We're going to be late.” 

She starts to whine again but then stops mid-groan to give you a once over. You shift uncomfortably on your feet, suddenly self-conscious about your appearance for the first time in years. 

“You look really hot…” she tells you and you fake gag at her words “Really pretty. Like a fairy and a smoke show at the same time.” 

You can't possibly look like that when you have such a simple outfit on, floor length high waist black pants and a flowy sleeve top that ties in the middle. It's barely formal but now you're thinking too hard about it. 

Blushing, you wave your hand to dismiss her compliment “Oh, my god. Go and change!” 

She rushes to her room on the opposite end of the hall and you finally breathe, looking down at your choice of fit and wondering if it's too much. 

Gyuri would've told you if that's the case, but either way it haunts your mind in the car on the way there, leg bouncing up and down under your best friend's judging gaze that only softens when you pout at her. 

“They are going to love you, babe. I'm so serious, they've been waiting years to meet you.” 

You nod because, yes, you're concerned that her friend group is not all as welcoming as she paints them to be. 

And you wish your doubts would go away but you're really, really not good at making friends. You're cautious, extremely closed off to new people and not as good with conversation no matter how much confidence you gained over the past years. 

When you walk to the loudest table at the laid back restaurant their friend Seonghwa made the reservation at, you think you won't be able to fit in with everyone else. You feel like an intruder, like Gyuri is supposed to enjoy this part of her life without you here. 

That's why you rejected every invitation they ever made. 

You celebrate birthdays with her, with Woo as well, but it's all very intimate and separate from their social circle, the one that includes the man you haven't fully faced in years. 

But you can't exactly back out now, not when one of them turns to you and seems to light up when they see you. 

“Oh? Is this her?” you recognize Hongjoong from pictures, he's the only one facing you when you approach the table, lowkey hiding behind Gyuri like a child. 

“Who?” 

“Huh?”

San is nowhere to be seen. Thank god. 

Slowly, everyone turns around and you see their faces light up with both delight and surprise. Your heart is pounding, you feel it in your throat, in your eyes, in the heat that colors your cheeks. 

But Gyuri just steps aside and presents you with a smile “This is her!” 

“Oh, Y/N!” Wooyoung gets up, rushing towards you and crashing into your frame with a crushing hug “I'm so glad you're here,” he murmurs into your hair and then turns to his friends, quiet them down “Everyone, this is Y/N, one of my best friends in the entire world.” 

He's such a dramatic human being.

You love him so much. 

Raising your hand, you shyly wave at them “Hi.” 

The entire table erupts with joy. Some of them greet you, some of them are saying that they are happy to be finally meeting you and Wooyoung grabs your arm and plops you down into the seat next to Gyuri, at the edge of the table. 

Laughing, you apologize for not meeting them sooner and then you feel a pair of hands on your shoulders. 

Panic raising, you quickly turn around to see who it is before releasing a shuddering, but calmer, breath. 

“She's a very busy woman, guys. She works for the competition, my competition,” everyone gasps at that but Wooyoung is smiling at you “and she's very good at what she does. Which means she's busy, get off her case,” he puts a glass and a can of beer in front of you “Drink, babe.” 

“Thanks, babe.” You whisper back and he leans in to peck your head before going away. 

Gyuri groans “Stop stealing that from us! It's our thing, Y/N, don't indulge him.” 

“It's his celebratory dinner…” you argue with a laugh that Hongjoong and Mingi follow. 

“Yeah! Can you get off my case tonight, Gyuri?” 

She huffs, wrapping her arms around you “I hate you all.” 

“No you don't!” 

The table laughs and everyone returns to their individual conversations when Woo sits down on his spot. 

There's a few seats left, one besides Mingi and one right in front of you but you don't think too much about it because soon Gyuri gets up to ask Yeosang something and Seonghwa occupies her seat right beside you. 

You think he can sense that you're more shy than you let on, because he doesn't include you in whatever he and Yunho were talking about and waits until he stops talking to him to turn to you. 

“So, you work for a publishing company?” 

The question caughts you off guard and you swallow the beer quickly before nodding “Y-yeah, I… Yeah.” 

He chuckles “You're nervous.” 

“I'm just not as good at meeting people as Gyuri is. She usually does the job and I tag along.” 

“I feel like I know you already, though.” He says, leaning back on his chair. 

“Because she talks a lot about me?” he nods “Yeah, she tends to do that.” 

“Wooyoung also talks a lot about you, San too… Sometimes,” your cheeks heat up and he misinterprets what it means “All good things, I promise.” 

You doubt that. 

Your brain gives you a hundred and one possible things San could've said about you. 

For some reason, none of them are good. But you choose to believe the gorgeous, long haired guy in front of you. 

“Well that's good to hear,” you take another sip of your drink before smiling at him “I was sure Woo was trash talking about me.” 

He shakes his head with a smile “He wouldn't dare, he has Gyuri on his ass all the time and I'm sure she would kill him.” 

“I'm sure she would kill him even if he didn't do it.” 

His smile grows wider “That's true,” he says, looking over at them who are, very coincidentally, fighting about something. You let out a sigh and he laughs again before clearing his throat “So, the publishing company. What kind of books do you like to edit the most?” 

Your smile grows wider too. 

For the next hour, you talk to Seonghwa about your job and how you started in it. He asks you about your classes and the challenges that you face on a daily basis and Wooyoung overhears and ends up joining the conversation as well.

You don't even hear footsteps nearing until a voice cuts everyone off. 

“I'm sorry I'm late!” 

“Baby!” Mingi gets up from his seat, but no one else does so he's stuck between the table and his girlfriend. 

“Oh, that's Love, huh?” you ask Seonghwa, Wooyoung too entertained messing with the couple to hear you anyways. 

“Yeah… Is that how Gyuri refers to her?” He frowns.

“Mhm,” you answer, leaning into him like you're about to tell him an important secret “I'm not supposed to call her that, don't tell her.” 

Seonghwa leans in too, pretending to zip his mouth shut and you laugh. 

The girl wiggles her way into the seat reserved for her and everyone lets out a groan when they smooch each other. You can only giggle and the sound draws her attention to you “Y/N?” 

You quickly nod “Yeah, hi, nice to meet you.” 

“Nice to meet you! Finally, I thought Wooyoung and Gyuri had an imaginary friend,” you laugh, shrugging at the joke “Love your outfit, by the way, are those— Oh, San, hi— Are those jellyfish?” 

You want to answer. You truly do, the yes right at the tip of your tongue, but words leave you when you turn your head around and find San already looking at you with wide eyes.

He looks great, he's a bit more muscular than what the pictures show and than the last time that you saw him, his arms hugging the fabric of the dress shirt he's wearing like it was tailored for him and everything. 

How dare he. 

You wonder if his heart is beating as loud as yours is right now. If he's surprised, disappointed or happy to see you at all. 

“Her favorite animal.” He answers for you “Hi, Y/N.” 

“Hi…” you whisper back and it feels like you're in a trance. He doesn't look away but the table quieting down once again snaps you out of it and you turn to the girl with a wide smile that you hope conceals whatever the fuck you're feeling at the moment “I love jellyfishes. Had a phase as a child when I would exclusively talk about them, too,” you chuckle, nervously, reaching for your earrings instinctively “Gyuri gave them to me as a present last Christmas.” 

You definitely overshared just now. From the corner of your eye you catch your best friend getting ready to step in if needed. 

Love looks at you, then at San (who's just standing next to you without uttering a word) and then back at you again, smiling like she just figured something out “Well, I love them.” 

“Thanks…” 

Coughing unnecessarily loud, Wooyoung gets up from his seat “You're late.” 

It takes a second but San tears his gaze away from you to look at his best friend and you take the opportunity to chug down the rest of your beer “Sorry, something came up.” 

Seonghwa turns at that and looks at him as well “You good?” 

“I am. Did you guys already eat? I'm starving.” 

“Nope. We're about to order. Let me get you a drink, come here.” And just like that, he disappears from your view and you almost sigh in relief. 

“Are you good?” Seonghwa asks you next and you reckon he's very observant. But then again, you're not the most gracious human being when you're in San’s presence, so, you figure everyone else noticed your change of mood as well. 

“Yeah, I just… I haven't seen him in a while and I didn't think he was coming. I was surprised, that's all.” 

“I can see that,” his eyes move around your face for some reason, frowning a little bit but then he seems to let it go, getting the menu closer to you “Okay, good, um… I actually made the reservation here because they have the best samgyeopsal in town.”  

“Do they?” 

“Mhm, so…” 

He helps you pick your food and when it's time to order, he moves back to his seat. Gyuri asks you with her eyes if you're okay, you nod and grab her hand under the table with a tiny smile and then everyone is moving around to make space for San and Woo once they return. 

He doesn't sit in front of you. 

Relief floods you and you can finally feel your muscles relax as he is so far away, at the other end of the table and in the same row of seats, so you don't really see him unless you really try. 

Which you don't, so your food goes down easy and the rest of the night as well.

Until everyone but you and Seonghwa move around their seats and he ends up right in your point of view as you do your best to ignore him and focus on his friend. 

Seonghwa asks you about your hobbies, you tell him that you love to write movie essays on websites no one even cares to read and he asks you to show it to him so he can look it up when he gets home.

“And you've always done this? Since highschool?” 

You nod and he beams “I read like the first three lines and it looks really good, Y/N. Is that why you love books so much? Because you're a writer?” 

“I wouldn't consider myself a writer but… Sure, I love to write.” 

“Did you know this?” he turns to San and your smile drops a little. 

“Know what?” 

“Your friend is an excellent writer.” 

“Oh, I know. She, uh… Used to write stories on her notebook instead of paying attention in math class,” he sips on his drink and at the detail you didn't know he knew, you turn to him fully “I used to read over her shoulder sometimes.” 

“She's really good.” Seonghwa is looking at your phone, still reading “Really smart, too.” 

San’s jaw tenses a little and you can't understand why “I know.” He says again. 

His friend is none the wiser, blocking your phone and returning it to you “I like it,” he says, smiling and you blush “The essay.” He clarifies after a second, prompting a laugh out of you that he joins. 

San doesn't laugh, but you don't pay attention to him because Seonghwa is asking you something else. 

When it's time to leave the restaurant, Wooyoung suggests going back to his apartment to milk the get-together as much as you all can.

You all throw your napkins at him in feign disgust at the choice of words but you all accept his proposal either way. 

So now you're sitting on the couch, legs crossed and head on Gyuri’s shoulder while you listen to all of them talk (more like argue) about something that happened at their university last week, their voices drowning the soft music playing out of the tiny speaker resting on the counter. 

San is on the floor, to your right. It's hard to keep your eyes off him when you feel him looking at you when you close your eyes and let the noise fade into the background. It's not like you're able to add something to the conversation anyway and Gyuri seems to be drinking her sorrows (not being able to hook Woo up with the girl she told you about) away. 

Your best friend is slurring her words already, drink in hand and index finger pointing at Jongho accusatively because, apparently, the fight they're talking about was his fault. 

“You don't—” she hiccups “You don't even know why it was your fault and it pisses me off even more, you know?” 

“Okay, let me take that.” Taking the drink from her hand and before she starts complaining you stand up to make your way into the kitchen. 

The sink is full and a mess, so you pour the liquid into it and leave the glass sitting right beside it. Distracted by the dilemma of helping Woo out with the dishes or not, you don't notice someone else also entering the space.

That's why you jump a little when you turn and catch Seonghwa leaning on the wall by the entrance. It startles you enough to laugh the nerves out afterwards and he shakes his head, smiling. 

“Sorry, didn't mean to scare you. They're boring me to death with the fight story.” 

You nod, realizing that maybe that's because he doesn't attend the university anymore. He told you he graduated last year “They're too drunk to let it go.” 

“Too drunk to dance to this amazing song, too. Who's playlist is that?” he frowns and you rest your back into the sink, rolling your eyes because he's pretending he doesn't know “Oh! Right, it's mine.” 

“And they just don't know how to appreciate it, huh?” he shrugs and you click your tongue “They're such bad friends, Seonghwa, I truly don't know why you keep them around.” 

“You appreciate it,” it's your turn to frown and he leaves his spot at the wall to walk towards you “You were singing along to it,” he explains and you let out an ah, nodding as he extends his palm to you, clearly inviting you to dance. 

“Oh, I don't… I don't really know how to—” 

“I'll show you.” 

His kind eyes are asking you to trust him. You really, really shouldn't. 

No matter how hard you try to bury the hopeless romantic little girl who decided to have a crush on a guy back in ninth grade, she's still there, begging you to let loose and live a little. 

When you grab Seonghwa’s hand, you think the smile he gives you was worth listening to her. 

You can't even tell the song that's softly playing anymore, a mellow r&b melody reaches your ear but you are not listening. You're focused on him, on the way he spins you around even if it doesn't fit the bit, on the way he laughs softly against your ear when he pulls you close by your hand and then pulls away just as quickly. 

Laughing as well, the spell of this beautiful stranger (because you remind yourself you don't really know him that well) is hard to break. 

Until it does. 

Someone clearing their throat behind you stops you and Seonghwa's feet from moving any further. When the tall, older guy turns you around, you're face to face with San and his scowl. 

“Sorry to interrupt but I need to get started on the dishes. Everyone else is heading out too,” he looks behind you, at the man who's still standing close to you and grabbing your hand “In case you want to ask Mingi for a ride.” 

“They finally stopped fighting!” he fakes excitement, finally letting go of your hand and walking in front of you, blocking San with his body. You chuckle, barely clapping your hands to join the pretense as he's pulling up his phone “Can I ask for your number, Y/N?” 

Blinking a few times, you're not sure if your heart speeds up because he's asking or because you hear San sigh exasperated behind him “S-sure.” 

When you put your information on his phone, he bids you goodbye with a pat on your head and hugs San on his way out the kitchen. 

Now that you two are alone, you suddenly want to run and join Seonghwa. You were doing so, so well. 

Avoiding San like the plague it's much easier when you're safe hiding behind your two best friends. 

Ignoring his stare would be much easier if you weren't stuck into place. 

“I—” 

“You—” 

You both speak over each other and you force out an uncomfortable laugh that he doesn't return. Instead, he motions you to go first while he occupies the space in front of the sink, turning the faucet on. In doing so, he has to grab your waist and move you out of the way which makes you short circuit for a second “I was going to help you with that.” You finally stammer out. 

He lets out what you take as an annoyed chuckle. 

“You seemed busy, I don't know how you would've done it.” 

Ouch. 

Why do you allow his words to cut so deep when you stopped caring about what he does a long time ago? 

The band aid rips, the stitches come undone and all it took him were five seconds to melt your resolve away like it was never there in the first place. 

“I'll… I go get Gyuri so we can leave Woo and you to get to it, then.” 

“Bathroom.” You hear him mutter under his breath as you are taking the final step to leave. 

“Huh?” 

“She's in the bathroom, probably puking her breakfast out,” he looks up at you to give you a tiny smile “You left her alone with Jongho and Woo for five minutes so she got ahold of another drink.” 

“God damnit.” 

Rushing out, you run into everyone else at the door and Mingi has to let go of his very intoxicated girlfriend when she reaches you to give you a hug “Don't be a stranger, Y/N! It was lovely to be around you, hm?” 

The sudden physical contact almost makes you gasp but you cover it up with a shy giggle “O-oh. Yeah, um, lovely to meet you too. All of you.” 

“Sorry about that,” her boyfriend grabs her arms and breaks the hug “She's right, though. Don't be a stranger.” 

You nod once, smiling a little more sincerely now and everyone says bye to you, including Seonghwa, who grabs your hand one last time and gives it a squeeze before closing the front door of the apartment. 

You think you feel your heart skip a tiny bit under all the shit San’s words pulled up to the surface a minute ago. But there's no time to dwell in that: you hear Gyuri opening up the bathroom door before gagging and closing it again with a slam. 

Jesus Christ. 

You two are really getting old. You stopped drinking like an hour ago, when you were starting to feel tipsy after your second beer, and you know she didn't drink as much as she used to maybe four years ago, but the visage that welcomes you when you open the door and find her crouched down in front of the toilet certainly brings back memories of those times. 

“I left you alone for like… five minutes.” Sighing, you lean in to hold her flimsy ponytail and pat her back. 

“I'm good,” she gags again and then holds up her hand to stop you from saying anything else “I'm fine.” 

Smiling, you help her up and she grabs the counter as she's washing away the taste of whatever she ate earlier today and alcohol “Me when I lie…”

“Y/N!” she hits your arm but the movement somehow almost makes her trip. 

“You want to lay down?” 

“Is she okay?” Woo’s head peaks into the bathroom and when he sees his ex, he makes a face. 

“Does she look like she's okay?” you help her out of the bathroom and start heading for Wooyoung's room. 

“Wow, wow— Where do you think you're taking her?” 

“To your room, dumbass!”

“Why mine? San's is literally right there.” He whines, pointing at the door you pass by without a second thought. You don't want to know where his room is or what it looks like at all. 

“Yeah, well, did San get her this drunk?” 

“How was I supposed to know that she was at her almost black-out phase? She never drinks that much in front of me!” he complains again but you're already tugging Gyuri in, who mumbles something incoherent and then flips Wooyoung off “Na Gyuri if you puke on my bed I swear to God!” 

If you didn't know Wooyoung so much, the whining and the attitude would probably make you think he didn't care for her at all. But he's brushing her hair out of her forehead, securing the blanket around her and moving to take her socks off when you reach the door. 

“I'm guessing you're okay with her staying the night?” 

“Of course you guys can stay the night, Y/N.” He says and he stumbles a little to get to you, so you smile and shake your head, about to let him know that you're not staying anywhere near his roommate when he continues “You can come over whenever you like. You know that, right?” 

“I know, Woo.” 

“I barely even see you these days, I… Oh! I forgot!” he points to the end of the hall, towards the kitchen “You guys don't really like each other so maybe don't come over when he's here because I don't want to see you sad!” 

“Lower your voice,” you whisper to him, bringing a hand to his face and patting his cheek a few times to wake him up “Did the alcohol suddenly hit you or something?” you sigh for the umpteenth time “Anyways, you should lay down and I'll get going. I'll come pick her up tomorrow and—” 

“That's such a great idea! Oh, I'm a genius.” 

“You didn't come up with it, Wooyoung.”

“San!” he calls all of the sudden and you wish he was sober enough to read the panic on your features. He seems much, much sober when his best friend starts walking down the hall and stops right beside you “Take Y/N home, please, she's going to give you a bag that you must protect with your life.” 

Said best friend looks at you, his eyebrow arched in a silent question “Gyuri’s stuff.” 

“Ah.”

“Go, go. It's getting late, I'll just… I'll cuddle with my ex until you get home.” 

And she has the nerve to say he doesn't want her back. 

When the door to Wooyoung's room closes and you're left with San on the poorly lit hallway, you make a mental note to never step foot on this place or allow your friends to drink ever again. 

You don't even look at the guy before practically running down the hallway and reaching for your bag. You make sure your phone is secured in your pocket as you slip your shoes on and soon you're grabbing the front door knob and twisting it. 

Keys jingle next to you but, again, you don't spare San a glance. 

“So—” 

“I'll get out of your hair, you don't have to… walk me home or whatever he said.” 

“Y/N, it's late.” 

Turning to him, your smile is as fake as the ones you've been giving him the past couple of years “And I'm a grown up, San, I can walk myself home.” 

“What about Gyuri’s stuff?” 

“She can wear Wooyoung's clothes, it's not like they never shared before. Anyway… Thank you for having me, it was nice to see you. Goodnight.” Your response comes out fast and it sounds as planned out as it actually is, kinda robotic and devoid of actual emotion. 

San can't see through you the way you see through him. It's okay, he won't mind it. 

He probably won't mind that you close his own door on his face either. 

If that door is what you hear when you're making your way down the stairs in order to make a fast escape, you choose to ignore it. 

You have to stop mid-way to compose yourself. You don't know why you feel like crying or why your heart is beating so fast. 

You knew going in that there was a possibility of seeing him tonight. You know how San affects you, so effortless and seemingly like no time has passed at all in between senior year and present day. 

You know all of this already, it's an endless loop that will keep repeating until you either move away or decide to stop agreeing to Wooyoung's plans all together. 

So why is your chest heaving with emotion? Why is nostalgia playing mind tricks with you? Why do you want to turn back and hug him and beg him to turn back time so you can do it all differently now that you know how to look like and what to say to make him love you back? 

Ah, you're definitely not sleeping tonight. So you start distracting yourself while walking down the stairs again. You remind yourself to tell a much sober Wooyoung how proud you are of him. You think about Seonghwa, about his kind eyes and the way he grabbed your hand to dance with him just half an hour ago. You wonder how long it will take you to get home if you jog all the way there. You—

Why the fuck is San outside when you get there? 

In a comedic way, you can see your attempt to distract your mind off of him slipping through your fingers and evaporating in the warm summer night breeze. 

In a realistic way, you're fucking pissed at him for taking the opportunity of a good night sleep away from you. 

You pass him and start jogging like you planned a minute ago. Footsteps follow you until his arm brushes yours and you take a step to the side to stop it from happening again. 

“Go home, Choi San.” 

“Stop fighting it, Y/N. I'm walking you home.” 

“It's a twenty minute walk—” 

“Drop it.” 

You do. And for the first ten minutes, no one utters a word even if the tension feels electric and the street is so quiet so you can hear when his breath accelerates when he jogs to catch up to you whenever you try to leave him behind. 

Isn't that ironic. He was the one who left you behind all those years ago. 

“I didn't know that you danced.” 

He breaks the uncomfortable but safe silence to say that? 

“Well, you saw me dance so I clearly dance when I want to.” 

“You never danced with me.” 

“You never asked me to.” 

He laughs “I'm pretty sure I did on several occasions, Y/N.” 

“Well, you're wrong,” you're getting annoyed. How dare he think he remembers better than you? “It doesn't matter anyway, what's past is past and—” 

“You also gave Hwa your number,” he interrupts, his long legs taking two strides to get in front of you, still walking, facing your direction with his hands on his pockets. 

It's dangerous and stupid, even if the streets are practically empty and the sidewalk barely has any bumps. 

You hope he falls on his pretty face.

“I did.* 

“I don't have your number.” 

“Well, I changed it and you never asked for it, so…” 

“You could've called me or texted me to let me know you did it.” 

He's getting on your nerves.

“San,” you start, taking in a deep breath you hope calms you down “We don't even text anymore, why would you want my number?” 

“Do you like him?” 

“Seonghwa?” you ask, frowning and he nods “Like… As a person?” 

“As a potential love interest.” He clarifies matter-of-factly and you roll your eyes. 

“I met him today, San. Why do you want my number?” 

“Because we're friends?” he offers after a second, shifting so he's walking by your side again. 

“Are we?” you ask, laughing bitterly at that “Because we haven't spoken a word to each other in years.” 

“That's not true.” 

“It is, San.” 

“You… You don't speak to me anymore, so…” 

“Well your girlfriend at the time told me she didn't feel comfortable with me speaking to you anymore,” you sigh “so I didn't and you didn't try to talk to me either.” 

“Well, I want to talk to you now.” 

“And is your new girlfriend aware of that? Is she comfortable with that? Because I don't want anyone telling me what to do anymore and—” 

“Why wouldn't she be comfortable? We're friends, Y/N.” 

“Are we?” you insist, petty, bitter and overall very, very hurt. 

He looks offended at that “I assumed we were?” 

He's getting on your fucking nerves. 

“We stopped being friends the second Minseo asked me to stay away from you because she didn't like me, San.” 

“She’s not in my life anymore—” 

The words are coming out of your mouth without even thinking it through. His demeanor, the way he's somehow reproaching you for whatever he saw between you and his friend, the way he pretends nothing happened between you and him, thinking that you two are still friends. 

“We stopped being friends when you pulled away from me, saw me do the same and did nothing to stop it from happening, San.” 

He stops in his tracks at that. You don't, pushing forward and quickening your step even if your calves burn. 

“Either way,” you speak up “Make sure you tell your girlfriend about wanting my number and then you can ask Seonghwa for it if you want—” 

“She's not my girlfriend anymore!” 

Now that stops you, just a few buildings down from yours, you turn around just to find San closer that you thought he'll be.

“O-oh. I… I didn't know that. I'm sorry.” 

“You didn't do anything to be sorry for.” 

“Still, it must suck so I'm sorry you're going through that.” 

“We didn't want the same things and so we ended it. It is what it is.” 

You nod. 

He walks the few steps separating you and you have to raise your chin a little to look him in the eye for the first time since you left his apartment “I wanted to tell you.” 

“That you broke up with your girlfriend?” 

“Yeah, I don't know why. It happened when I broke up with Minseo too, I just… You're the first person that I thought of calling when it happened. I texted you, too, but the messages didn't go through.” 

You hum at that. 

Why would he even say that? 

You resume your step, not really knowing what to say until you reach the stairs that lead to your building’s entrance. 

“And you didn't ask Woo for my number?” 

He follows you up. 

“I don't think he would've given it to me if I asked.” 

That sounds like an excuse, so you don't let it slide as you enter the code to your building and let yourself inside, San holding the door so he can get in as well “Why would he do that?” 

“Because he…” San sighs, pressing the elevator button “Nevermind. He just wouldn't.”

Frowning, you turn to him “No, now you have to tell me.” 

“It doesn't matter, really—” 

“Tell me, San.” 

He stares for a second and then looks away, like a child, vulnerable and you can't help but soften at that “He didn't like the way I treated you.” 

Eating your words from before, you shake your head “You didn't treat me like anything.” 

The elevator dings and you get inside. 

San follows you. 

“Exactly,” he says, resting his shoulder on the metal “Like you said I just did nothing and—” 

“Well, sometimes that's just what happens,” you want to end this. You want to pack Gyuri’s bag, give it to him and never see him again. 

This conversation hurts, it reopens barely closed wounds and it creates new ones you don't really need when it comes to whatever happened between you two. 

There's only so much a person can handle and it really doesn't help that you're a fool for San. He takes advantage of it, of the fact you can't really push him away at this point and the fact that he wants to have this conversation now instead of four and half years ago? 

Mean. 

He's mean. He's evil. He's… He's staring at you with a spark in his eyes that you recognize too well. 

Hope. 

When you get to your floor, you try to wipe the image away while busying yourself with your keys. Your hands tremble a little but you're able to open the door of your apartment and get in without inviting him. 

He gets in anyway. You take off your shoes as he closes the front door. 

He stays silent as he follows you around the apartment and you don't worry about turning the lights on. You get into Gyuri’s room and start picking out a comfy hangover outfit for your friend. Some clean underwear, sweatpants, two shirts and socks. 

When you drop to the floor, in front of the closet, to look for a bag to stash all of it in, San silently clutches beside you. 

“It shouldn't have happened to us. Never us.” 

You can't take it anymore. 

“San, what is this? What are you doing? I mean, why are we—” 

“I know.” 

“It's been years…”  

“I miss you.” 

He's so mean. But the softness in his tone resembles the one he used all the way back in highschool, when he told you that not being friends with you didn't feel right and you want to cave in right there and then. 

Your heart screams at you to do it, your reason warns you that you both have been through this before and it never ends right. 

You simply can't stay friends with Choi San. 

Your love for him must run too deep, your resentment claws at it and tries to hurt it but it's an immovable force that won't budge even if you try to bury it under the years that have passed, the things he has done. 

Tears gather in your eyes and you try to blink them away as you stare at your best friend's clothes on your lap and try to come up with something to close this path up again, reconstruct the picket fence you built around it the second he broke your heart for the first time. 

“Yeah,” you whisper back, letting the walls fall a little “I miss you too but I don't think I miss whatever version of you you are right now, San.” 

“W-what?”

His shaky voice makes the walls crumble and crash. 

Turning to him, your hand shakes as you place it on top of his “And you don't miss the version of me I am right now. You miss what I was back then, the comfort and the shoulder to cry on I offered you when Arin and you broke up. You miss my availability and the way I didn't press my feelings on you because it didn't matter if I liked you or not, you were my friend first and the guy that I had a crush second but—” you choke up, tears falling down your cheeks even if you don't want them to “I can't do it anymore. I'm not that girl anymore and I won't be there for you now that you and Kyungmi broke up because I can't handle it. I can't, I'm sorry.” 

He doesn't deny any of it.

He stares at you, tears wetting his cheeks as well and it hurts even more this way. You wish you had the strength to hold it together, to treat him like you did on the street a few minutes ago, but you can't. 

There's no way you could ever hate him like you want to. 

“You know…” he starts in a whisper, letting out a humorless chuckle “That's what I used to tell myself too.” 

“Hm?” 

“That you were my friend first and the girl that I had a crush on second.” 

How dare he mutter the words you always wanted to hear, the ones you picture being said in a different setting, the ones that haunted your every waking thought that period of time you doubted your friends, your mom, yourself for even believing Choi San could ever have a crush on you. 

He doesn't get to say them. You want to tell him but the words die on your throat and form a lump that you can't swallow down. 

You don't get to say that. You don't get to say that. 

Your hand drops from his and you look away again only to grab the first bag you find on the closet floor and shove Gyuri’s stuff in it. 

If the lack of response it's what prompts the hurt in his voice the next time he speaks, you don't want to think about it. 

“I wish I didn't. Now it's too late to do something about it, huh?” 

This time the rage comes back with a mask on. Feing settlement for all the what if’s covers you like a blanket on a really hot summer night: unwanted, unnecessary. 

But you can't sleep without it, so you do nothing to push it away. 

“I guess it is.” 

You get up from the floor, leaving the room and wiping your face with bitterness coating your movements as you wait by the door for him to get out. 

When he does and he steps in front of you, you extend the bag and he takes it without missing a beat. 

Voice robotic and words premeditated, you open the front door for him “Thanks for walking me home and taking this back.” 

He leans a little into your space and you don't move away. But just as he did in highschool, he takes in your hitched breath and does nothing more.

“Thanks for letting me talk to you.” 

He didn't give you much of a choice there but it's okay. This is closure, this is the end of your story with Choi San and you convince yourself you're glad that it is. 

“Sure,” you whisper back and he steps outside, turning around to watch you slowly close the door “goodnight, San.” 

He doesn't say it back. 

When the darkness of your apartment engulfs you, that's when you let yourself breakdown. Covering your mouth with your palm, you descend until your knees are against the wood on the floor and closing your eyes you make it a point to let it all out. 

You'll let it all out, drink some water, text Wooyoung and Gyuri to let them know you're safe and go to bed. 

And tomorrow you'll begin your day with the freedom of finally knowing what would've happened if you or San ever took the next step. 

This is fine. This is moving on. This is— 

The doorbell rings. 

Opening the door again, you crease your eyebrows in a silent question that San doesn't care to answer, so you look around the floor in case he forgot something you're missing. You wipe your cheeks and under your eyes as you turn to him again “Did you—” 

Time slows down when he makes it past the threshold and you can't move an inch, gaping at who you once thought was the love of your life “What are you doing, San?” 

“Something about it.” 

“What?” 

“Forgive me,” he asks, breathless and in a murmur, fueling your confusion. And then he's closing the distance, dropping Gyuri’s bag and cupping your face so gently that it hurts “but I'm doing something about it.” 

You stopped dreaming about the possibility of San kissing you that one time you two were on your bed and, another time, you told yourself that, if it ever happened, you wouldn't kiss him back. 

It's too late to kiss him back. 

But sparks fly when he crushes you against the wall and takes in a breath before slothing his mouth against yours like he's been waiting to do this every single day for the past nine years you've known each other. 

There's nothing you can do to conceal the way yearning takes over you, pours out of you, making you breathe into his open mouth and kiss him back like you always wanted to. 

You already know it is a mistake by the time you grab his shirt to keep him in place but does it really matter when this is all you ever wanted? 

Feeling warmth leave your face, you notice the way he desperately crowds your space as his chest bumps into yours, leg claiming its place in between yours, the palm that leaves you pressing against the wall, next to your head. 

The kiss is filled with emotion, with longing and desire and it steals the air out of your lungs tragically and beautifully at the same time. Before, you used to dream about his lips making everything feel right, making you fit in in a world you didn't feel like you belonged to. 

But this kiss drops you into uncharted territory, drags you into the depths of something that should be buried by now, after all this time. It brings the flame back to life and it's dangerous. 

The fact that it feels this way, both marvelous and catastrophic at the same time, makes you so sad. 

Sorrow descends down your face until your mouth is picking it up and your tongue is mixing it with whatever emotion is cruising through San right now. 

You have to know. 

He spent your entire youth and early adulthood keeping it to himself, knowing when to show his true colors and when to hide them, choosing who to do it with and you realize the San that lives in your head is nothing but a figment of what you wanted him to be. 

Because him holding to your waist like it's his only lifeline doesn't fit the San you remember, him telling you he liked you back then doesn't fit the guy who was just your best friend. 

You need to know. 

“San,” brokenly, you speak into his mouth and he pulls away just enough to see your face. Your eyes remain closed, your chest heaving and your lips trembling “Why are you doing this?” 

“Because I want you, Y/N.” 

You push him away, weakly, almost like you don't really mean it because deep down you don't but he steps away like you're asking to. 

Because, of course, your mind scraps the bottom of your resentment to give his words a completely new meaning. 

“You can find another girl to fuck and be your rebound, San,” more tears spill down and you wipe them away in anger but more threat to fall down so you cover your face with your hands and groan, desperate “I can't do this, especially not when I know that you know how bad I wanted you. Y-you know what you do to me San so stop—”

“I want you in my life. I don't— What? I don't want you like a rebound, I… Can we sit down and turn on a light so I can look at you when I say this?” 

His words should be reassuring but they're not, the way you tend to feel unlovable around him coming up to the surface, preventing you from thinking clearly. 

You can also feel his lips on yours still. It's dizzying but you manage to push yourself off the wall and pad around until you hit the switch of the warm light lamp near the couch and the apartment comes to life just like that. 

He takes in the space he's never seen before, walking slowly towards the living room and looking over the bookshelf that screams your name all over it. He smiles a bit as he looks over the book titles and you look away before your heart starts acting up again. 

You can't stay mad at him for long if he's looking through something so personal to you and smiling that fondly at it. It feels even more intimate than the kiss you two just shared. 

Wiping your cheeks once more, you are sure you look a mess but he doesn't seem to mind it once he comes into your point of view, sitting down on the couch, in front of your standing form. He grabs you by your hands until you're sitting next to him, close to him, cologne intoxicating your senses. 

“I told you I liked you when we were in highschool, right?” 

You nod. 

“You seemed surprised but it was dark so I'm not really sure. I thought you knew, everyone knew.” 

Oh, he's a comedian. 

“How would I have known, San? I… Yeri told me you liked me one time, in senior year, but I denied it. Then, my mom told me you seemed to want me in a non-platonic way and I dismissed her as well,” you take in a deep, shaky breath “For me, the thought of you liking me just didn't make sense. You loved Arin and she's… She doesn't look or act like I did back then at all, so how would I have known?” 

You didn't need clues and puzzles and what if’s, you needed words and actions that weren't confusing. You needed him to tell you back then, because telling you right now and kissing you senseless after he broke up with a girl he supposedly was very in love with means nothing but pain. 

“I didn't realize you liked me too,” you make a face, about to tell him off, but he interrupts “I didn't! I thought you liked Yeri and I thought you saw me as the annoying guy who wouldn't leave you alone. I only just realized it a couple years ago, because Woo told me.” 

You raise your eyebrows and mutter under your breath “I'm murdering him tomorrow.” 

The corner of his lips twitch before he shakes his head in dismissal of what you said “I liked you. I really, really liked you and never told a soul because… Well, it's scary when you fall in love, right?” 

“San, you had no problem telling Arin, Minseo or Kyungmi that you liked them.” 

He looks down to the floor, lost in thought and you want to open your mouth to take what you just said into a new direction, but you don't “Maybe that's because I didn't love them the way I love you.” 

Oh. 

Love you? As in… He loves you right now too? 

No way. 

“You didn't love me, San. You don't love me right now either, you… Maybe we both were in love with the idea of love? Maybe that's what happened and—” 

“Quit telling me what I'm feeling, Y/N. You always do that, you always assume you know what I'm feeling but you don't!” 

Raising your voice a little more, you try to get your point across in the worst way possible: by being stubborn “You don't know me! How can you possibly—” 

“I knew you back then, Y/N! And I loved you back then, too!” He looks like wants to say something more but he doesn't, instead, he takes a calming breath and then leans into your space for the third time tonight “And I might not know you now but I want to. That's what I meant when I said that I want you. I want you in my life, I want to know the person you became when we stopped talking, I want to talk to you every single day and I want to hold you and kiss you and be by your side however you want me to, I just… I can't lose you again.” 

His confession renders you speechless and you notice his chest is heaving, going up and down in sync with yours. 

But the way he pulled away from you senior year still hurts, it paints a picture of what's going to happen if you accept this. 

You can't believe his words. 

He must feel lonely and confused, like he did when Arin broke up with him. He must be looking for a shelter you can't provide. 

“And when you find another girl that's more to your liking? What then, San?” 

“There's no one that I love more than you, Y/N and I'm sorry I was shit at proving it back then and I'm sorry that it took so many years for me to come to my senses.” 

He's tearing up and your heart pangs absurdly loud at that. 

“I saw you with Seonghwa earlier today, laughing and dancing and flirting and I thought: Oh, maybe if I didn't waste that much time pretending I'm someone I'm not, that would be me.” 

You stare for a second, you watch a single tear drop down his cheek and then look away. 

“Is that what you were doing? Is that why you pulled away?” 

“Maybe?” he offers and you turn to him again. Is not enough and maybe he can see it in your expression, because he goes on “I mean, I… I thought I wanted Arin. I thought I wanted Minseo. I had people in my life who were really happy to see me with them and I just…” 

“Wanted to keep them happy,” you nod, understanding. He doesn't have to say his mothers name for you to know he's referring to her and maybe his other highschool friends outside of Wooyoung “Were you pretending with me as well?” 

“No,” he answers right away “You and Woo were the only ones who saw me for who I really was back then.” 

“And why do you think you love me now, San?” you ask, deflating against the couch and ignoring the way your heart soars at his quick response.

“Because I never stopped,” he stammers out and then clears his throat “Because I looked for you in Minseo and Kyungmi and I wondered for years why they couldn't make me feel the same way. And I told myself I didn't need to feel the same way and that I deserved to wonder for the rest of my days but seeing you tonight? I can't.” 

Straightening your spine, the pained look you sent in his direction is not intentional but it prompts him to lean closer and closer until he's cupping your cheek again. 

“I can't keep wondering.” His voice is a sweet whisper, a siren song that draws you in until your forehead is resting against his. 

All these years, you were so self-focused on changing to a better version of who he used to know, learning from your mistakes and closing off to the opportunity of letting him prove himself a better man, you forgot that time passed for him too. He’s telling you he changed, too. 

Imagination is a safe space. Is where you hide, where desire can take its wings and fly high without hurting you too much. Make belief has rescued you before but this? The way his nose nuzzles softly into yours and your breaths tangle? This is very real. And reality is prone to hurt you. 

But the want you feel is undeniable. The way your entire being wants to cave in and give him an opportunity is suffocating, it makes you choke out a sob that he follows with one of his own. 

You kiss him, softly at the beginning, but his hands on you tighten and you let yourself get lost in the way they go down your neck and your arms, caressing you softly until they reach your waist and pull you into his lap. 

Pulling away, you grab his chin with two fingers and force his teary eyes to snap open, searching for an answer on yours.

“If you hurt me,” you start, breathless “If you're mocking me, if you're using me to get over Kyungmi, if you are pulling me back in to break my heart again, Choi San, I swear to God I will kill you.” 

“I won't do that to you ever again, Y/N,” he returns softly “I love you, I'm sorry if I ever hurt you but I love you.” 

Others would argue that it is pathetic how quickly you forgive him. But then again, you could never be mad at San. 

You were only mad at yourself for how everything turned out. 

“I love you too, Sannie.” 

Saying something never felt so freeing before. 

“Oh, Y/N…” you can see the way relief washes his worries away “Y/N…” he starts to say but then leans in to kiss you again and never finishes his words. 

You don't mind it. 

Pouring out all the pent up affection you pretended to bury for years, you explore his mouth and carve into your memory the way he feels. The way he sighs into it when your tongue brushes his, the way he pulls you in closer when your fingers reach the nape of his neck and pull on his hair there, hands splayed on your back so he can keep you in place as he leans down and places you against the worn out couch. 

He maps you out, hands going down your waist in a familiar feeling that brings back that memory of you two laying down on your bed. Only this time, he's actually touching you with a purpose. This time, you two have made up your minds and your limbs are tangled in a way you can feel all of him pressing up against you. 

It starts to get stuffy, the space on the couch not nearly enough to have him the way you want to. Soon, you're both standing up, mouths still moving against each other and hands roaming everywhere until you're undoing the buttons on his shirt. 

He pulls away to fully take it off, eyes never leaving yours, dropping the shirt to the ground, next to the couch and then he's on you again, making your back crash into the wall as he works the knots keeping your blouse together. 

He walks you through the hall, stopping only to take your top off and then he's walking you to a room that has a familiar scent that doesn't belong to you.

“Wrong room, wrong room,” you say into his lips and he laughs, looking to your surroundings “Mine’s over there.” you point to the other end of the hall, taking his hand and pulling him towards it. 

You don't make it far before he's yanking you towards him again. He looks down, taking your body in and you do the same, his firm and defined stomach a sight you never thought you would be able to see. 

“You're so beautiful,” he whispers, backing you against the wall again and kissing your cheek “So, so beautiful.” 

Turning your head to chase his mouth, he lets out a heavy sigh when his lips trail a path to your neck and murmurs against the skin there “I never told you how beautiful I found you before but you're so perfect, baby.” 

“I always thought I wasn't your type, San,” you let out a noise when he grabs your hips and pulls you forward, crashing his into yours “Fuck.” 

“And I always thought you were too much for me, too smart,” he kisses his way back up, focusing on your jaw and chin until he's kissing your cheek again “too pretty,” he moves to your ear, pecking right under it and you hold him closer “too good for me.” 

It doesn't really matter that this is all new to you, the way he's speaking, the tenor of his voice, the things he's saying… It sparks something familiar in you. You're pulling his hair back to make him look at you, a moan slipping out of his lips at that. 

You want to hear it again. 

He's smiling at your reaction, hand tightening on his locks.

However, that smile drops when he seems to recognize the gleam in your eyes. 

You gather up courage, feeling empowered by the way his hooded eyes darken but wait patiently for you to speak your mind. 

“Maybe I'm too good for you now, too,” you lean in, your lips softly tracing his “Maybe you should prove to me that you deserve me, San.” 

It's a dare. One that he seems to like a lot because his eyes sparkle with the same fire they used to back in the day. 

“Oh, I'll prove it to you, alright.” He whispers, panting when you let go of his hair and he leans into you to kiss your lips briefly before pulling away again.

His hand tilts your head back and you rest it against the cold wall, his fingers touch your bottom lip before going down and down and down until they rest against the seam of your pants, unbuttoning them in one swift movement. 

Going back up, his nails softly dig into your skin and you preen, taking the soft sting of his ministrations like you two have done this a million times before.  

His mouth is on yours again, his hands are pulling you off the wall and into your room until you two land on your mattress with a soft tud, a moan spilling out of your lips when he sloths his knee in between your legs and pulls them apart with expertise. 

You don't have the mind to break down what that means. 

Opening your eyes when he kisses down your neck again, you notice your room is barely lit by the street lights outside, curtains pulled open and windows closed but, this way, you can see the way San kisses between your breasts and your belly, catching his eyes when he looks up to measure your reaction. 

You sigh, already feeling some sort of build up going on down there and he hasn't even touched you properly yet. 

You don't even want to think about how wet you actually are. 

He leans back, open palms going down your legs slowly until they reach your feet. It tickles and you can't help but let out a giggle that he joins short after, his gaze never losing the edge because of it, though. 

“San…” 

He guides your hips up so he can take off your pants and you sigh when his hands return, raising your leg up “I missed your laugh,” he says low, attaching his lips to your calf “I miss being the one making you laugh too.” 

You feel like crying again but then he's letting your leg down and grabbing the other one to give it the same treatment, so your tears can wait. 

This time, he moves upwards till his mouth nears your clothed center and your breath hitches. 

Yeah, you can definitely cry later.

“You want me to prove to you how much I want you, Y/N?” he murmurs, his lips ghosting your mound now “How much I love you?” 

“San, p-please…” 

“Fuck, look at you.” He sounds like he's too lost in the heat of the moment and you're kind of grateful, because the moan you let out when his fingers hook on your underwear and pull them to the side to expose your pussy to his hungry eyes is loud. 

When he kisses you right where you need him, you let out another moan. And when he parts your folds to lick a stripe up to your clit, you curse him under you breath until he's laughing against you softly, the vibrations accumulating heat on your belly. 

He doesn't tease you much longer and you look down at him just to catch the moment his self control slips, eating you out like a man starved while his hand stays on your hip to hold you down and keep you underwear from interrupting his feast. 

“This is like,” he dives in again for a few seconds and you grab the sheets beneath you “All my fantasies coming to life but better.” 

He's so chatty during this and the only thing you can do is stammer a yeah? and pray for it to reach his ears.

“Mhm,” the circles your clit with the tip of his tongue and your legs shake “Taste even better than what I dreamed, too.” 

The heat of his mouth leaves you, lips spreading your wetness through your stomach until he fully reaches your face, your eyes closed and lips already waiting for him. 

Tongue caressing yours, your hands trail down his torso and focus on getting his pants off. You're shaking with excitement so it proves to be more difficult than you imagined at first but he helps you in unbuckling his belt. 

Once the piece of clothing is one the floor (or the bed, you're not really paying attention on where it lands), you don't waste time in feeling him up through his boxers. 

The hiss you get in return makes you smile. 

Bringing your lips to his neck, you suckle on this pulse point and gain another pleased noise before grazing your teeth against skin and moving to his collarbone next.

In a way, you get what he means. If he truly was pining over you the way you were pining over him, the thought of exploring his tan skin and making him moan feels like a dream. 

So you kiss him again in order to make it all last longer. 

The minutes pass between the both of you, softly making out and figuring out what gets both of you going, discarding your underwear in the process. 

You realize your moans make San’s cock twitch against your leg and he seems to notice the way your hips buck up everytime his hands handle you more roughly. 

After a few minutes of just this, you feel his hand making its way down again and the pads of his fingers circle your clit until you're grasping the sheets again. He gathers your arousal and then enters one finger slowly and when it slides in and out with ease, he enters the next one. 

There's really not much prepping he needs to do, already soft and compliant under him, you relax into his comfortable touch before you're aching for something else. And your mouth is preoccupied with his, so you do something else to catch his attention. 

Hands caressing his back, you let them drop to his ass with a soft smack that wins you a soft huff on amusement and then a whine when you move his hips towards yours. 

“Condom?” 

You shake your head “I'm clean and I have an implant.” 

“Oh?” he smirks, about to tease you but you squeeze his butt again and he moans “Fuck. I'm clean too.” 

“Good,” you whisper against his cheek, laughing as he arranges his position. 

And he might've been touching you all this time, kissing you until your mind emptied and your lips are all swollen up, but the look on his eyes when he slowly enters you is what might drive you over the edge. 

Grabbing your hands, he pins them on the side of your head as he moves, dropping his head down with a groan as you take him in, nose touching yours and moth whispering sweet things you can't quite pick up. 

He feels so good. 

This all feels way too good to be real. 

In the cloud you're at, you allow yourself to dream a little more before the reality of what your confessions mean dawns on you. 

For now, you allow San to make love to you. Sweetly, slowly and with a passion you never were lucky enough to encounter before. 

Maybe it's because your previous lovers didn't have your heart the way San does. 

He rams his hips into yours hard, closing his eyes and resting his warm cheek against yours, kissing your face inch by inch when you accompany his movements with your own. 

When his pace picks up, you hug him close and secure your legs around his hips as you moan. 

“Y-yes, fuck.” 

“Like that?” he repeats the movement from before, pulling out and then in with such force it rocks the entire bed. 

“Just like that, baby, fuck.” 

“God, you sound so good,” you smile a little, forehead resting on his shoulder before your head falls down against your pillow again “I love you,” he repeats against your lips, letting your hands go to cup your face with both of his again “I love you so much.” 

Teetering over the edge, you feel happy tears stinging in your eyes. Though closed, you can feel San’s stare on you, on your face, on the way you react to his sweet words and relentless pace. 

You say it back in a whisper and he repeats it again and again and again until you're both coming and tears are spilling down your cheeks. 

He kisses them away. 

You wipe his with trembling fingers as you come down, having trouble breathing from everything that just happened. 

You don't feel suffocated anymore, you feel like you've been freed. Like this was supposed to happen at some point and you two finally got around to it. 

“I love you,” he says once more before slipping out of you with a parting kiss. 

Holy shit. 

When San gets up from the bed and you point him to the bathroom, down the hallway, you're left with a sticky mess in between your legs and a lot to think about but you settle on four things. 

San just made love to you. There's no way that was just sex. 

There's also no way you're coming back from this. 

Gyuri is probably going to kill you. 

And that, obviously, your feelings for San never left. You feel the familiar warmth of them spreading through your post-orgasmic state. They're there, mocking you, asking you who the fuck you thought you were for pushing them away. 

He returns, toilet paper in his hands before leaning in and cleaning you up, lips immediately finding home on your skin as he does. 

You both giggle at that.

You probably need to shower but you've been crying and there's no way you're leaving this bed tonight. He throws the paper away on your bedroom’s trashcan and then crashes into the bed next to you, still naked, still looking at you with so much love you're wondering what stopped you from seeing it was there before. 

Taking his hand, you bring it to his lip and give his knuckles a peck “That was really good.” 

“It was.” 

“I can't believe we actually just did that…” 

He smiles and what he says next shocks you even more than his confession “I want to take you out.” 

“San… You just came inside me not even ten minutes ago.” 

“And?” you laugh and he shakes his head, leaning into your space again “I spent many years doing everything wrong, let me do it the right way.” 

“Making love to me one time and then taking me out on a date is not the right way, sir.” 

He nuzzles your cheek with his nose and you let out a pleased sigh “Who said it was just one time, huh?” Attacking your neck with his lips again, you push him away with a laugh. 

“Oh, come on!” 

He laughs as well “Give me ten minutes and I'll make it two!” 

San makes love to you two more times. And by four in the morning, you're snuggled into his arms and sleeping soundly. 

When you wake up and find the space next to you empty, you think it was all a dream. Your naked form begs to differ and you quickly put the t-shirt you usually wear to bed on and your panties underneath it to go out and face the feelings of your actions fighting with the blender in the kitchen. 

“How do you two live with this stupid thing?” 

“We don't,” you answer, startling him “We don't use it. What are you trying to make?” 

San’s shirtless, wearing his pants and his hair messy. Looking back at the living room clock, you see it's just five past ten. 

Smiling as he approaches you, you forget you must look a mess too when he pecks your lips and barely pulls away “Good morning, beautiful.” 

You pretend to cringe at that, pulling away “Oh, God. Morning, dumbass.” 

“You like it, you're blushing,” he points out and the pink on your cheek deepens as he's going back to the blender “Does anything work here?” 

“The microwave,” you shrug “And the stove. Were you trying to make yourself a…” you look over the ingredients he has pulled out of your fridge “Green juice?” 

“I was trying to make both of us a green juice,” he corrects and your heart skips at the immediate domestic attitude he has with you “But now I can tell neither of you drink anything like it, hm? I'm buying you a blender.” 

“Please don't.” 

“Why?” 

“Why do you think that one is broken?” 

He hums, huffing out a laugh seconds later and you walk over to him, unsure on how to approach him even though what you did yesterday night and earlier this morning didn't allow your shyness to step in. 

Now you're feeling it. 

He can tell, because he stops fighting with the steel appliances to grab your waist and pull you close “I wanted to make you breakfast.” 

“We can make breakfast together and I can order your green juice,” you compromise and he nods, but he doesn't let you go “And later we can go out on that date you promised me yesterday and we can go over what we're going to tell the two idiots.” 

His smile drops. 

“Oh, fuck.” 

Grimacing, you nod “It was the second thing I thought about after waking up.” 

“What was the first?” 

“Oh, I was trying to remember if you ever asked me to dance before,” he nods with a smile “Guess what? You didn't.” 

He fake gasps at that “I did!” 

“No, you didn't!” 

“Babe, yes I did,” he insists and you laugh, which prompts him to wrap his hands around you tighter when you try to get away from him “It was when—” 

“Oh. My. God. I'm going to be sick again.” 

Now when the fuck did Gyuri come back. 

And why is Wooyoung with her too, jaw slack as he watches both of you pull away from each other and create a safe distance that doesn't help whatever your best friends just saw. 

“It worked?” he asks and you can barely hear him until he hollers like a crazy person “Oh, it worked! I am a genius!” 

“Wooyoung, hold me! I'm going to kill them!” Gyuri looks like she's about to launch towards you at any second now, so you close your eyes and accept your fate. But nothing happens “Wait— What worked?” 

When you open them again, San is hiding behind you and Gyuri’s back is to both of you as she looks at Wooyoung with, what you assume, murderous intentions. 

“Gyuri, let's talk about this,” the black haired guy puts his hands up “You were too drunk to discuss it so I made the choice of— Gyuri, no!” 

You burst into laughter when she starts chasing him around the apartment and San giggles as well, only more nervous than delighted by their little cat and mouse game. 

He's probably sensing he's next on her hit list. 

As if you would let anything happen to him in the first place. 

“Stop, stop! I'm sorry, please leave me alone!” you hear Wooyoung’s voice echoing through your hall and in a second he's entering the kitchen, rounding you and San “I'm so happy for you guys, really, this was meant to happ— Stop!” He cries when Gyur catches onto him and yanks his hair to stop him from running.  

“Y/N,” she starts, chest heaving and you take a step back, crashing into San’s chest. He holds onto you only to push you a little and protect himself from the fury of your best friend “When I told you fuck him I didn't meant this!” 

“I know.” 

Wooyoung whines but he can't get away from her grasp so he just accepts it and pouts like a child. 

“A-and you!” She points towards the guy resting his chin on your shoulder “How dare you! If this is something casual for you then—” 

“I love her.” He defends himself quickly and your heart all but stops at that. 

“You do?” Wooyoung coos, amazed at his best friend’s confession. 

Gyuri's anger falters at that. 

“You… You do?” 

“And I love him,” you let out in a shy whisper, smiling a bit “But you already knew that.” 

“Of course I already knew that, bitch, I am your other half,” she makes a point to stare at San as she says it, letting Wooyoung go and he massages the part of his scalp that was targeted by his ex “Don't forget that.” 

“Y-yes ma'am.” 

You laugh again and Woo joins the embrace, eyeing you both expectantly and rolling his eyes when neither of you say anything to him “Well, you are so welcome guys. What are we having for breakfast?” 

You and San don't get to go out on that date. 

But when you do, he asks you to be his girlfriend the next day. 

And when you say yes he almost breaks down in excited tears.

Eventually, even Gyuri comes around and threatens him into treating you right, which means he earned her seal of approval. 

You delete the document on your laptop when you find it a month into being his girlfriend and, instead, start drafting your new beginning on it, in first person this time because the story doesn't feel like it belongs to someone else now.

The first line read as it follows: 

How did I ever think San and I could be just friends? 

If you read all the way down here: THANK YOU SO MUCH. Any feedback would be greatly appreciated!

© jensthwa, 2024.

[waitingonher]

LOVER'S ROCK [h.o.o. characters in love]

percy jackson

memorizes your fast-food/gas station order. even if you didn’t ask, percy’s still gonna get you a lil something from wherever he goes. he has a shoe box that holds every single thing you’ve ever given him. may or may not still have the receipt from the restaurant after your first date. listens to the music you recommend him. usually, percy’s very opinionated about the music he listens to but he always gives yours a try. embarasses himself solely to see you laugh. yes, the time he dropped his ice cream cone into the hudson was on purpose.

annabeth chase

waits for you to watch the latest episode of your favorite show. annabeth will wait for you no matter what, even if it pains her to not know whether or not her favorite character just died. eases up around you. she appreciates not having to be completely on guard all the time. paints your nails for you. annabeth always finds it funny when she sees your non-dominant hand perfectly manicured while your dominant hand looks as if you did it blindfolded.

jason grace

annotates his favorite books for you to read. when it’s the occasional romance novel, jason writes “us <3” in the margin everytime the love interests do anything remotely romantic. gifts you a necklace with his initial. he smiles everytime he sees it resting against your chest. jason’s phone is entirely made up of you. his lockscreen, his home screen, his widgets…everything is you. jason randomly gives you massages. if you’re working on some school assignment he’d come up behind you and start massaging your neck and shoulders, getting out the knots you didn’t even know you had.

piper mclean

allows you to bypass her dnd. most of the time, piper’s on dnd so she made it so that only your notifications could bypass it. she does the chores you hate the most. even if she hates it just as much, she’ll do it just to see you happy. piper loves making those cheesy couple videos with you on tiktok. every day she’ll tell you how you two are basically tiktok famous?? piper only listens to you when it comes to fashion advice. yeah, she’ll acknowledge what others have to say about her outfits, but she truly only cares about what you think. 

leo valdez

loves you to the point of invention. you can’t even count the amount of gadgets leo’s made for you. he also comes home with little knicknacks made from spare parts of his projects. flowers made of metal scraps >> regular flowers. lets down his guard for you. leo doesn’t feel the need to keep up his happy, humorous persona when he’s with you. he lets you take whatever side of the bed you want. even if leo likes to sleep against the wall, he’ll let you because he knows it makes you happy.

hazel levesque

buys matching couple outfits. you two have your own pinterest board dedicated to your matching outfits. takes care of your hair. considering her own hair, hazel knows a lot about hair care. date nights where she oils your hair and washes it for you over anything else. ties your bows for you. she laughs when you finish tying the bow in your hair only to realize that the loops and tails are different sizes. wears matching jewelry. you two have lockets with photos from your first date. 

frank zhang

never the first one to let go from hugs. frank can and will stand there and hug you for the entire day if you want to. ties your shoes for you. whenever he notices your shoes are untied he entirely stops what he’s doing and drops to the floor, propping your foot on his knee to tie it. always gives you his food. even if you had said you didn’t want any, frank still shares some with you.

[leviscolwill]

— dad!jude bellingham headcanons !

pairing: dad!jude bellingham x fem!reader

req: could you write dad!judebellingham ml <3

note: i tried writing headcanons because i feel like my writing is very 👎👎🍅🍅🍅 at the moment, i hope you'll like it still !! reblogs are VERY appreciated since the tags are in a silly goofy mood right now #useless 😝🤪

tag list: @ceofmercedes &lt;3

it's well established on judeblr that he is a girl dad, so girl dad it is

i think he would spiral a bit over the fact that you're growing a whole human being in you

he would say random shit like “no but do you feel her legs grow ?”

and you're like 😐😐😐 of course not

but the poor boy is just clueless 😪

he would always remind you of how you're the most beautiful woman on earth, even when you're crying your eyes out because ron fell off his chess piece in the philosopher's stone

now,, i think we're all well aware he would spoil your daughter rotten

getting her new clothes or new toys whenever he passes in front of a store because “she might need it one day”

but !! he would never let her turn into a “daddy i want a squirrel” kinda girl

you would both make sure she's very well mannered because he is very aware his parents' education played a big part in who he is today

i feel like being strict wouldn't be a problem for him either

yk being the eldest in his family, he wouldn't be swayed by your girl's pleading eyes when she acts wrong

he would 100% cry on her first day of pre-school (it's the cancer in him)

and he would try to drop her / pick her up from school as much as he possibly can with training and stuff

if you speak another language, you'd learn it to your daughter and use it to talk shit about jude 🤭

“have you seen what he wore today ?” “yeah daddy's shirt is very ugly”

in my case she would say quoicoubeh to him

i feel like he'd get so frustrated and start sulking amd pouting before your daughter reassures him

okayy bc it's spooky szn rn 😋

family matching costumes !! (call it corny 😡 i do not care)

monsters, disney characters or the adams family... he'd have soooo many ideas

he'd go trick or treating just to eat all the sweets

playfights with your daughter for their girl's attention

“it's my mommy !”

“oh yeah ? but mommy liked me before, so i'm the number one in her heart”

“it's not true ! mommy tell him he's a liar”

you can only roll your eyes because he really has beef with a whole child ???

but he's just a kid himself !!

everytime she gets to see uncle jobe she's overly happy

and jude would smack the back of his head when he says a bad word

(like he's not the one to curse at home yk 🙄)

is it a bad thing i think he would secretly hope your daughter has a bad dream so she'd have a good excuse to sleep in between you both ?

because he would

just to cuddle with her

then he regrets it when she wakes him up early in the morning

when she grows up he would be soooo invested in her school's dramas

like, actually asking for updates during dinner like he's dan from gossip girl

“what do you mean ben is dating his ex's best friend ?? he's such a di... bad person”

he'd be so gassed whenever she would wear his shirt (especially at school)

like you got all these clothes but chose this particular england shirt ? 🥹🥹

(as if half her wardrobe isn't his jerseys from every club he's been at)

(+ jerseys he exchanged with other players and signed jerseys by football legends)

he would sooo show her off to his teammates

“yeah my girl knows how to read now” 😎

and show every picture of her EVER

even the embarrassing ones

100% would introduce his friends as uncles

“say hi to uncle gio” (🫠)

now hear me out bc i think it's my favourite idea

he would totally look up hairstyles tutorials for your babygirl and try them out

once he gets the hang of it, he would never stop finding new ones

and since he doesn't have a sister, he would go to his mum for advice

on hair, but also girl stuff so he can pretend he already knows it all in front of you

you'd also go to his mum to advice tho, because being a parent (especially a mum) is never easy

and she would gladly share all of them with you

when you get into fights with jude your girl would always try to make it better

“dad says he's sorry”, “mum said she's not mad anymore”

of course you both know she's lying but somehow it always works ???

so your relationship is the prime example of what she's looking for when she grows up

and she secretly hopes she gets to love her s/o just like her parents love each other (too corny now ?)

anyways jude would treat you both like his little princesses, and he's so so so grateful he gets to live a lifetime with you two

or maybe more than two who knows 🚶‍♀️

[yxine]

— ADMIRE. ❞ (2)

part 1 — part 2 — part 3

Bada Lee x Original Character!:

— in which Bada unexpectedly gets to see and battle her long-time idol and crush on a survival show she was in, Street Woman Fighter.

— Everyone expected that Jam Republic would be only full of western dancers, so imagine when they found out that the "Queen of Dance" in the Korean Dance industry was joining the survival show Street Woman Fighter.

note: I do not own any of the people here nor the show except for Lea Chang. This was also made for entertainment purposes only.

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No matter where Bada would look at, her gaze always lands on her. Everytime she looks at her, something flutters inside of her. Bada doesn't know if it's due to her being a fan of the queen or something else but it's uncomfortably warm.

"I can't help but stare at her.." muttered the Bebe Leader as she kept glancing at Lea. Tatter who was beside Bada snickered at the obvious admiration her leader has for the Jam Republic Member, although no one can blame her since this was the Queen of Dance of South Korea.

"Someone has a crush~" Teased Lusher who also heard her leader making the said leader mutter curses at her two members.

"Yah! Not so loud and no I do not, besides this is a competition." Bada tried to convince her two members which ended up failing because her eyes went back to the queen.

"No I do not, my ass. You keep ogling at her though I don't blame you, she's ho—" Lusher retorted before getting cut off by her leader.

"Sh! This is a family friendly show!" Bada whispered irritatedly at her member who only snickered in response. Her other members watching them bicker also snickered as they get to see a flustered Bada Lee for the first time when usually it's her who makes the others fluster.

"Welcome back after the small break, dancers! We will now proceed with the first mission no-respect battle!" Once again everyone cheered getting even more hyped up due to a certain someone.

I must prove that I am worthy to be the winner. Was everyone's thoughts as some of them glanced at the tallest female in the room.

"Do you think someone would battle me?" Lea asked Kirsten who was beside her, glancing at the competitors with an uninterested gaze but inwardly she was very much interested.

She knew about the drama 1million and Deep n' Dap had due to the leaders separation. The tension between two teams were suffocating the whole room, it almost made her hide herself, almost.

"Well if they're gonna fight you, I think it'll be mostly out of respect even though this is a no-respect battle." Kirsten responded with a small smile as she stretched her arms trying to warm herself up incase she was called out.

"Yeah! I mean you're basically qualified to be a judge in this show right now, so even if you're an enemy here they'll still respect you and gain your recognition." Latrice added as she shook Lea's shoulders since she's behind her.

"You really shouldn't be boosting up her ego right now, Lat." Emma warned Latrice playfully as she feigned a glare towards Lea who only muttered curses at her.

"I've never felt so jealous until now." Yoonji from Mannequeen mumbled to her team who playfully reprimanded her as she stared at Jam Republic.

"The next dancer to choose her no-respect dancer is....Bebe, Bada Lee." Bada stood up nodding her head while jumping for a couple of seconds to prepare herself. Her team and the other crews cheered for her as she took a stride towards the stage with a mic in her hand.

"My no-respect is not someone who I don't respect, this dancer is someone that I admire and respect a lot...Jam Republic, Lea Chang." Gasps filled the whole room, no one had the guts to battle with the queen and to see Bada challenge her was out of this world.

Everyone in Jam Republic cheered for Lea as she stood up gaining pats on her back as she fixed her beanie. She moved towards the stage with an uninterested stare towards the Bebe leader but internally she was very excited to battle with the famous Bada Lee.

The crews surrounded the whole stage eagerly as they watched both women standing across each other with similar auras but Lea's seemed stronger. They can't help but see that they both look similar to each other but Lea was a bit more taller than Bada.

"I hope you live up to my expectations, Bada Lee." Lea coolly stated as she stared at Bada right at her eyes. Said woman was getting much more nervous as her cheeks went into an unnoticeable blush if you don't look at her closely, her heart hammering in her chest as she felt heat go through her body.

"Are both dancers ready?" Kang Daniel asked both women who nodded in confirmation.

"Ready? Fight!"

The Dj began to play a song as Bada goes first. Shirt by SZA. The moment Bada moved, Lea found herself focusing on how she carried herself, the way she swayed, the way her breath went heavy when she did a sensual move, the way she smiled like she was lost in a paradise, the way she looked at her with such admiration and something more behind her eyes. It took the queen's breath away, like she was sitting a throne with a dancer from another country moving so seductively infront of her.

Bada found herself flushing when she saw the way Lea stared at her as she stopped just inches away from her. The rest of the crews even the judges and mc could feel the high tension between both women, something about it made them think it was not meant to be watch publicly.

The song switched to another song, Streets by Doja Cat. Two sensual songs right next to each other, the dj really knows how to keep the tension going.

Lea just stood there with a unreadable stare before moving close to Bada wrapping her arms around her shoulders before moving down the moment the beat came keeping her unwavering stare. Moving her hands down Bada's upper body before turning around the other way on her knees. It was getting hotter as Bada bit her lip watching the woman seduce her with her moves.

Bada couldn't focus at all, she knew she would lose and she'd be happy to lose but this...it was too much for her to take it. She tried to stable her breathing as she watch Lea continue dancing, the roars of the other crew seemed to go silent as she stared. She felt overwhelmed with the tension, it was suffocating and somehow she wanted more. She didn't even notice her finish until the music seemed to go silent and the screams began to get louder.

She also didn't even notice that the judges picked Jam Republic instead of Bebe, no. She didn't even care, she was too focused on the battle she just went in.

"And the winner for this round is...Jam Republic, Lea Chang!" Bada didn't even listen and was still stuck on what she just witnessed until a hand larger than hers grabbed her arm, pulling her into a hug.

"You did great, love." The person whispered, Bada became even more flustered as she realized it was Lea. She could only nod in thanks as she hugged back.

"Maybe we could go out sometime?" Lea continued before pulling away with a wink and walked back towards her crew.

That was fucking amazing.

[tasteless-lemonade]

Who Is Gabby Kinney? - A Reading Guide

Gabrielle "Gabby" Kinney, aka Scout or Honey Badger, is the clone/sister of Laura Kinney. She was first introduced in All-New Wolverine #2 and would become the second-main character of the book, acting as sort of Wolverine's teen sidekick. Think that's an interesting concept? Then this post is for you!

First of all, this list is for the main comics in which she shows up. * indicates issues where she is an important character or part of the main team. In the unmarked comics listed below, she is not the focus, but has a good scene.

All-New Wolverine (2016)*

Ghost Rider (2016) #1-#3

Hawkeye (2016) #12*

X-Men Red (2018)*

X-23 (2018)*

Extermination (2019) #3-#5

Age Of X-Man: Prisoner X (2019)*

Age Of X-Man: Omega (2019) (Gabby herself does not appear very much, but it concludes the story started in Prisoner X)

X-Force (2020) #9

Wolverine (2021) #8

Deadpool: Black, White & Blood (2021) #1*

New Mutants (2021) #14-#24, #29, #30*

X-Deaths Of Wolverine (2022) #3-#5*

New Mutants: Lethal Legion (2023) #1-#5*

If the unmarked comics of the previous list at least had a cool scene with Gabby, in those of the list below, she is in one page with one speech bubble at best. The only reason I put these here is because I didn't want to miss these moments, but I only recommend reading these if you really want to see everytime Gabby shows up.

Mr & Mrs X (2018) #1

Uncanny X-Men (2019) #9 & #10

X-Force (2019) #11

X of Swords: Destruction (2020)

Way Of X (2021) #1

X-Lives Of Wolverine (2022) #5

X-Terminators (2022) #4

Knights Of X (2022) #5

X-Men: Hellfire Gala (2022) #1

To finish, here's the list of the times Gabby shows up in other comics, like anthologies, specials and Infinity.

Merry X-Men Holiday Special (2019) #1 - Has a story

Marvel Voices Infinity Comic (2022) #2 - Shown in the background

X-Men Unlimited Infinity Comic (2021) #35 & #40 - Shown in the background

Marvel Voices Infinity Comic (2022) #27-32 - Is one of the main characters along with the rest of sniktfam

Fearless (2019) #2 - Has a story

Marvel Comics #1000 - Has a story

[generouskittentidalwave]

Watching the She-ra reboot after 5-6 years

Hey remember that show in 2018 that came out on Netflix during Tumblr's Twitter era and stirred up enough toxicity to turn you into Dave the Skeleton in the highschool science classroom?

Well BUCKLE IN for a RIDE cause I recently watched that show for the first time after avoiding it for YEARS, after seeing the fans and the haters be so devoted to either the fans praising it like a godsent deity or haters devoting their whole life to finding something wrong with every aspect of the show that it makes you wonder if they realized that they've become the Catra that they sought to destroy, I decided to avoid even touching the show and went about my life in other fandoms.

Well years have passed and like a Hallmark movie time abruptly went on and the drama soon faded, the tides have settled, the war has ended, and neither side remains the same. The fans have grown up, matured and enjoy the show as it is and the haters have lost all that sweet sustenance back in 2019 and have went the ways of the DoDo. With everything finally settled, I joined in on the rush of new fans recently that started rewatching the series and wanted to display my thoughts as well as a first time watcher ^^

I went in well aware of all the criticisms in mind, and having seen the original She-ra, and I just gotta say that my worrisome thoughts on watching it was completely washed away from the start of the show. I was worried of Adora being that one marysue character that is from the bad guys side but is actually a good a guy with the personality of white bread and with flaws of just being "a little bit QuiRkY" but she completely shooed away those fears. She is a well balanced character with a unique and well done backstory, her character breaking away from the steriotypical chosen ones and her having flaws that don't take away her being a good person but instead have their own charm and relatability that makes her very fun and down to earth. She is so golden retriever coded and I love it. What I like most though is that she wasn't "random main character comes in to lead everyone to victory out of nowhere" , instead of making her the unsaid leader, they made her the main character who is the muscle of the group and part of the heart and has to learn overtime and understand their ways instead of making her the leader. It makes way for her to pave and earn her way as being the main character instead of it being given by default by making her the leader and I love that break away. And that break away also helps to counter the fears I heard about the white savior trope by making Adora the way she was and making Glimmer and Glimmer's mom the queen the actual leaders of the rebellion that they helped start.

Love the best friends squad, I love Glimmer's growth and her bond with Adora, I like how she went downhill and built herself back up again as a person as it was very realistic with her being so young and having to replace her mom as queen. Bow is my spirit animal, period, but I really want to know more about his huge family. I imagine that because they are all historians they must go to the academy or similar academies that Bow was meant to go to and I can see why they wouldn't question him not being there as 12 siblings is A LOT to keep track of. Swiftwind is great but he shall always be known as Horsie and the queen's sacrifice hurts everytime I see it, I love how she owned up to her own flaws. Shadowweaver messed up being a mother figure 3 times, she needs parenting classes fr, 'nough said. I love all the princesses but Mermista is my personal favorite. Also why is aunt cast named Castaspella, I can't even say it without dying of laughter 💀🖐️

Now I know some of you are sitting at your computer with 5 monsters in hand and sweat anxiously dripping from your forehead as you dramatically hover over the keys just WAITING to write a five page essay response if I even dare to utter the name Catra and her relationship with Adora. So, I'ma give you my opinion.

Honestly, their romance was the end goal since the beginning and the story made that clear and honestly I like Catra's growth as a character from her knowing she has anger issues and actively working on it to better herself, helping to save others and helping to save Adora in the end. Her realizing that pushing others away to protect herself only harms her and everyone around her in the end and her realistically taking it slow and steady to better herself as a person for herself and for Adora is something a really like. Yes their relationship was hella toxic, especially in the middle (but I do like how Adora recognized that and punched Catra when they were in the portal). The build up was great, the middle ground of her doubling down was great, and I think her growth at the end was great and that the two are happy and not in a toxic relationship with eachother anymore at the end. I think what truly makes it odd is although the redemption was great the time constraints made it so they couldn't flesh it out to help answer and address the past actions that were caused by her, they did so great with her slowly becoming better and better, and so it wouldn't have come off as bad as it did if they had just a bit more time to address everything with that instead of being forced to dive right into it which definitely left a- well- less than good impression to it's audience. But they tried their best with what they could do and honestly for a show as surprisingly dark as this I'm just glad they aren't in a toxic relationship anymore and are happy in the end and that Catra got redeemed. It definitely wasn't trying to romanize abuse, however it came off as such due to constraints and them rushing the ending which gave plenty of ammo to people who already hated the show to have a reason to hate it more. In my opinion if you don't like it that's valid, if you do like it that's valid, me personally I'm not a romance person so I couldn't care enough either way.

Now to address some things I know some people are waiting for, but in speed run fashion. Mara's She-ra design was the fault of the designers not agreeing on what they wanted her to look like, I was expecting her to have brown flowing hair not blonde, I get the stripping of individuality message they tried to go with, it just needed better designers and better execution but that's as deep as it goes. It's not that they are racist, they are more along the lines of "you need a more organized team cause her design changes every five seconds like wtf" kind of situation. I'm glad they didn't automatically forgive Hordak or accept him but I'm glad he was changed enough to not be a killer that's mass murdering people anymore and as long no one is dying by his hands anymore and people don't automatically forgive him then that's fine by me, whatever keeps others from dying a horrible unnecessary death.

Overall, in conclusion, love the show, great depth, great characters, love the humor and amazing magical girl transformations, awesome rep, stronk princess punching things, would most definitely recommend, especially now with all the wave of chaos it's initial release sucked in now evaporated. (Seriously there are full tags and blogs deticated to hating a show about glowing princesses fighting aliens, it's okay to not like a show but come on people there is more to life than that 💀) Enjoy it, have fun, and I hope you have a great day/night! ^^

[imraespace]

LIFE'S HARD WHEN YOU'RE INLOVE ─

─ WITH RIN ITOSHI !!

At a certain time, when the sun is down and the moon is up, you normally will hear the sounds of sleeping. That peaceful feeling of letting go of everything while regenerating your energy is a feeling that everyone loves. Especially yourself, yet you're here up at 3:49 AM, re-reading that one part in the book where the character "fell in-love".

"Her mind goes blank everytime she sees him.. // Thoughts cannot formulate anymore.. // Before she knew it, she had already fell.."

Your eyes scanned the words, reading what it feels like to fall in-love. So before, what you felt wasn't love, it didn't feel like how it is in the book. So when will you fall in-love? Even though you always say these simple words, "Relationships are too much work..", but sometimes, a girl can only just dream.

The darkness that surrounds your room blackens out your thoughts from the outside world, leaving you alone in your bed, under your blanket with your phone light, showing you the words you wished, secretly wished, to feel one day.

And so, with those thoughts the darkness swallowed you entirely, leaving you to dream with romance on your mind.

It has been 5 minutes since your alarm went off but finally, it reached your ears causing you to awaken from your slumber. A little bit of drool pooled around one spot on your bed as you realized that the posture you fell asleep on, caused your mouth to hang a bit.

The sun from your window gave you some sort of guide to understand your surroundings a bit better. A little too good actually..

"Why can I.." you mumbled, touching your face until you finally got to your eyes, feeling your frames. You groaned, rising from your position, leaving the open book on your bed as you reached for the phone next to it.

Finally, the alarming sound was gone and now it was just silence. It didn't help that you haven't achieved your full 8 hours of sleep, rather you got 3 hours this time.

Staring off into the distance of your room, debating if you should go back to sleep, or get ready for school. Maybe checking your socials will help a bit..

So you opened Instagram, to shake the sleepiness off but after two scrolls..

Back into that position you woke up in! Even with the glasses on.

"There's no way in hell I'm gonna deal with this again." An annoyed Reo said. Here he is, glaring at you with his hands on his hips, ignoring the boy next to you.

It was now 7:00 AM and Reo had a time waking the both of you, which is normal and this "talk" as well is normal. Yet he always ignores the boy..

Though he always says "Thanks to you both, my mornings aren't perfect.", or something so, both you and Seishiro were too busy trying not to sleep through his rants.

After the very normal morning routine in your home with the boys, you three were finally in school. Reo and Sei said their goodbyes as they left to go to their class while leaving you alone to enter into yours.

You placed your items on your table, then..

"Rise and shine! No sleeping here!!" A voice stopped her from resting her head on the desk.

Your eyes shifted from the desk under you, to your one and only best friends! Meguru and Yoichi!!

"Are you okay? You look kinda.." Yoichi started, pulling up a chair to sit next to you but his eyes never left your face.

A pout was formed as you thought about how many hours of precious sleep you lost.

Meguru sat himself on your desk, patting your head.

"You look kinda dead!" Meguru boldly pointed out.

"I stayed up until 3.." You mumbled. The patting ceased and confused looks shot at you.

The duo looked at each other and then at you.

"Are you depressed?"

"..What."

"Are you sick?"

The sudden wave of questions caused your eyebrows to knit together in confusion as you stared back at them.

"Why are you asking me these questions..?" You glared at them.

They looked back at you as if you asked the most insane question ever.

"Well um, you're the only person we know who sleeps longer than 8 hours." Meguru started, as Yoichi supported him.

"We rarely see you stay up, almost never." He said.

Now that you think about it, they do have a point. You're not the one to stay up, mostly just sleeping through everything.

"Oh I was up thinking about love." You simply stated.

And with that bomb-dropped sentence, the boys went dead silent. Until Meguru started laughing.

"WHAT'S SO FUNNY?" You lashed out, standing up from your seat.

"Seems like she's not sleepy anymore.." Yoichi mumbled.. "She sounds grumpy though.." He continued.

Meguru on the other hand had to stop himself from falling off the table, while laughing. You stared at him for a while, with a scowl on your face, waiting for him to stop laughing.

Yoichi, who held a small smile on his face, watched how his friends interacted with each other.

"I won't say it's funny but it's not normal for you." He said, trying to not turn the situation into a funny one.

"Yeah I know I was just thinking, okay?" You mumbled, finding yourself back in your seat, watching as Meguru had finally died down.

His eyes landed on you, giggling a bit at the idea, which caused you to form a small pout on your face. You rolled your eyes and sighed, dropping your head softly on his lap, only because he was on your desk.

"I'm sorry for laughing..!" He softly exclaimed, petting your head that rests on his lap. His habit of petting your head always seems to cheer you up or calm down. Another one is Yoichi's hugs. Those seem to be your favorite.

Twisting your head on his lap, only to see who had entered the classroom thus far, you began to stare at a boy. He wasn't looking in your direction but something about his side view seems.. capturing.

The more you stared, the more Meguru petted your head, the more you drifted off into the dreamland and no one seemed to stop you this time, accepting the duty of waking you up when it's class time.

However, that same boy had noticed your staring. His eyebrows knitted together in confusion yet he shook it off as he saw that you were falling asleep.

## LIFE'S HARD WHEN YOU'RE INLOVE. --

╴“ WITH RIN ITOSHI?? „

ฅ^._.^ฅ : some things about y/n !! she mostly sleeps through the day, only does stuff IF needed !! with her given gift of being effortlessly smart , all she does in her free time is : nap , eat , sleep. hmm what if.. one day y/n develops a crush and now has to ACTUALLY work to achieve a goal ? : date rin itoshi !!

2 // 4

TAGLIST!!: @deezy12299 @kuroronana (OPEN)

-`♥︎´- for this story, i'm trying a something new, which includes words/phrases, foods and hometowns from japan and germany. if there's any errors please point it out !

-`♥︎´- word count : 1k

[deathbxnny]

Can you write something about the stellar on hunters with a so who’s a herrscher?

-----♡

A/N: Hello! Thank you for the request! I wasn't too sure at first how to incorporate the Herrscher part in the hsr world at first, but I hope I did well!<33 Also what Herrscher the s/o is, is up to the reader!

Characters featured: Kafka, Blade and Silver Wolf

Content: Fluff, some very vague, but not really important Honkai lore mentions if some hi3 characters(?), Herrscher s/o

Reader has no set pronouns!

((Not really proofread, so sorry for any mistakes!<3))

-----♡

☆《Stellaron Hunters with a Herrscher S/O!》☆

-----♡

》Kafka

Kafka is very intrigued by your abilities, or rather the power you hold. She wants to know absolutely everything about your abilities and your origin. Your strength is one of the many things she loves about you.

She's glad, that she doesn't need to worry about keeping you safe and is in fact flattered, when you protect her instead. She likes to nearly brag about your power to others in teasing words, knowing that she's unstoppable at your side.

She does her best in help you out too, depending on what type of Herrscher you are. If it's a Seele type of situation, then she makes sure to also bond with your Herrscher counterpart. If you're more like Welt and have your Herrscher abilities completely under control, then she'll make sure that you become stronger.

Either way, she loves your strength and how much it benefits the Organisation. Especially since you get their work done faster and in turn make more free time for her to spend with you. You also keep enemies away, which is always a plus.

As long as she is close to you, she feels powerful as well and that makes her happy.

-----♡

》Blade

He was at first unimpressed by your abilities, seeing as he thought he was quite strong already. But once he saw you out there on the battlefield, destroying waves of enemies with minimal effort and flaunting your powers... well, his opinion on your abilities changed. Yet he never voiced it out loud, being too prideful and stubborn to ever admit it. Not that you needed to hear it, with the way he eyes you everytime you show off your power.

Blade still tries to protect you at all times, even if you can do it on your own just fine. He will also probably get a little salty, if you protect him all the time instead, though he doesn't mind it all too much. Not with the way that it secretly warms his supposedly "cold and dead" heart.

Depending on what your Herrscher type is, he will act differently with your powers. If you have a Herrscher counterpart that's tormenting you from the inside, then he may become hostile towards it. If not, then he'll treat it just like he treats you.

If your in full control of your Herrscher abilities, then he'll take that as an invitation to cause as much havoc and chaos as possible. It makes him proud to see the destructive force of your abilities and know, that you are his. Only his.

All in all pretty impressed by it deep down, even more so if you enjoy the art of battle as much as he does. Protect his back and he'll protect yours.

-----♡

》Silver Wolf

She doesn't really care much, that you're a Herrscher. Don't get her wrong, she finds it impressive and is quite proud to have an s/o like you. But other than that, she doesn't make a big fuss out of it.

She feels more at ease knowing that you're watching her back, whilst she hacks into facilities and such. It makes her more relaxed and focused, her eyes always glancing at you here and there to reassure herself that you are still there with her. Not that she has to worry anyways, when you can easily handle enemies with a single wave of a hand.

Likes it, when you tell her about your abilities or Herrscher existence, whilst she works. Is surprisingly still able to remember every detail you tell her, even if she seems like she isn't listening or she doesn't care. But she promises that she does.

If you have a Herrscher counterpart that's tormenting you, she'll do her best to make it co-operate with her own means. If it's friendly however, then she'll make sure to treat it with equal respect to you.

Is basically proud to have you as her lover, but doesn't make a big deal out of your abilities. With or without your powers, she'd still love you the exact same.

-----♡

A/N: I hope this was okay! I haven't played Honkai in a very long time, so I hope, this isn't too bad.

(Requests are always appreciated!<33)

[arugan]

Dream sweet in sea major ft. ssc

explanation below ⬇️

Second stage children are the most interesting characters to develop, drawing them was so fun.

i had an graphic designer assignement, it was about creating art, our path to create. but i didnt really understand the meaning of the assignement tbh so i gave this, with a silly explanation of how i create at the end lol. the song is Dream Sweet in Sea Major, from Musical Miracle. very good band i recommend.

i tried to give a meaning to each illustrations but to be honest my mind is not that smart, youll have shitty explanations and i hope i make it short lol.

"It feels like flying, but maybe we are dying" this lyric remind me of the whole group in general. second stage children have a limited life time, they have to make the most before its too late, their fightning style is compared to "flying" and their causes of why they do is because they are "dying" (ssc genes may dιε quicker since they dont live long (?)). i picked garo for this one, he is the one who fights alot

"A cosmic confluence of pyramids hologrammed" tbh i dont understand the meaning of the lyric 😭 i know it has a deep meaning in the song itself, but still. cosmic confluence symbolize the different timelines, all the ones that made saru forgot, which is the chalk trait he is tracing. he wanna make fey's head clearer as possible so he (fey or saru) can complete his mission. "pyramids hologrammed" remind me of all the hologrammed moments in cs, with el dorado.

"She knows you heard her" "Staging music murder". this time ill talk about the illustration. there is a part of the circle, it illustrate a clock, i was supposed to put "8" behind, why ? cuz they die at 20. sadly if i added a number next to all these typographies it wont come out great. instead i drew their logo team as clock hand. pointing in front of them. meaning time is going to kill them at "8". which explain the music murder.

"In line before the show began" that is so conceptual all the things i explain but bear with me 😭. in line -> zanark got enough talent/skills -> changed team everytime = reason why he appears 3 times cuz everytime he was in line to play again (show = match) (i drew him with braids because it PISSED ME OFF HIS HAIRCUT i had enough)

"To be where I am". "where" is pixelited because he is always looking for his place, he always moved on to other places, either its for matchs or looking for skills. and he only "found" his place when he miximaxed with clara j + joined chrono storm.

"Children born of one emotion", very basic and understandable. SSC were motived by one reason, people denied them the whole time, they grew up with one strong emotion : anger. (and saru is the only one to command the whole thing too, tiny detail)

"Our devotion's deepest ocean" this is one hell of a lyric but sadly i couldnt come up with a very nice illustration or meaning. their motivation is so strong they wanted to conquer the entire world.

anyway, sorry for the disappearance haha, i didnt have anything to post yk, homeworks and stuff. my first year end this 25th may, it went so fast

[harriertail]

Omen of the Stars reread + a lot of thoughts

The Fourth Apprentice

The cover is actually the best cover in the series are you kidding me? Its so pretty. The yellow blue and dark green r so nice

Why does the TC/ShC stream drying up affect the lake water level and not the RiverClan... river? Does the Moonpool stream still run???

Every mention of Squirrel and Leaf sitting together "so close they were like kits just out the nursery" is an actual STAB in the chest. They go thru so much :((((

A flash flood seems to take out the beaver den (or its just poorly worded?) so what was the point of the journey...

Dovewings personality is snappier than i think pple give her credit for, I kinda enjoy her

Tigerheart literally does not interact with her on the mission lmao what is he on about 'I'm gonna miss you'

Jayfeather missing Lionblaze is act so painful :(

Fading Echoes

So much of the opening of these books is just recounting previous events and character arcs omg this goes for all WC books.

Hollyleaf :(

Blossompaw's siblings joke that she moons over Toadstep. Idk why fucking Thornclaw becomes her mate later on then :/

What is Tigerheart doing on the border ? he doesnt explain it? I actually thought that he was already meeting Dovepaw secretly but then hes not like what is he doing...?

Dovepaw being worried for the other Clans + her thoughts about having this power should put her above the Clan rules could be so interesting. the series back-and-forths over Lionblaze (we must protect ThunderClan) and Dovepaw (we must protect all the Clans) even though Lionblaze gets annoyed at Dovepaw for using her powers to look after ThunderClan???

The whole "being obsessed with Prophecy and what it means" is probs a part of Jay's character (as he baso became a med cat to fulfil his destiny) but it also feels like a gross misunderstanding of what a Prophecy is. All the "the dark forest is rising. This might be what the Three is meant for" is like putting the horse before the cart- a prophecy is meant to describe a situation and hint at the character/means to solve it; but PO3/OoTS has the characters/means to solve, but no conflict :/ its a bit backwards.

I like the mentions of Firestar + Sandstorm going on night hunts etc.

Blossompaw/fall's a cunt lol. Shes kinda fun but shes not nice at all especially to Ivypool.

I love Littlecloud. I love when the med cats share ideas and discuss things 10/10 makes my day everytime

The pacing is actually... not good. Ive defo always been on thr camp of "too many povs and too few chapters ruins the book" but wow FE really shows it.

So much of Doves characterisation so far is about agency and not wanting to be special and have Firestar/Lion/Jay talk to her. I wish this was not forgotten about in later Super Editions.... kittypetdovewing2k24

this battle is crazy tho. I wish more of the DF plot was about stirring up trouble between the Clans and specific troublemakers in each Clan rather than the later nebelous 'dark warriors invade the forest' battle. Ill get to that one day

Night Whispers

Picking right back up in the battle...

and again just recounting the last books events. hollyleaf death/disappearance explanation count: 3

Kinda love how many times shes mentioned. From Lionblaze avoiding the tunnel she ran into to Jayfeather finding the fur that Leafpool hid.... cute

Okay i actuallt love ShadowClan discussing the battle + tactics + training and then the chapter immediately after the TC camp doesnt mention it at all and Ivypaw is like "why arent we discussing the battle? Just because we won doesn't mean we will again!!" interesting character moments + a nice look at differences between the Clans

Ivypaw and dovepaw fighting over tigerheart????? they fight so much but then always wanna be together like jfc.

Dove n tiger have negative chemistry like it just jumps right into "no boundaries can keep us apart". I get shes using him as an escape from TC/prophecy bullshit but like.... rlly? I wish it was just like expanded on. Tbh i wish every chapter had like just two extra pages to actually delve into things a bit better.

Lmaoo lionblaze cinderheart leafpool dovepaw patrol this is so fucking funny brambleclaw u get one point for this

Tigerheart break up scene count: 1

Flametail POV. Interesting but... why? Bad things r coming we know... what was his point narratively? It was cool tho. I liked seeing ShadowClan.

Every single book Dovepaw has a character die/get really hurt and is haunted by their screams. Rippletail, Longtail/Briarpaw, and later on its Antpelt... jesus christ girlie has it SO rough

The ivypaw "nernernenerner im better than you im being trained by tigerstar" to "oh fuck hes actually a bad guy i cant believe the terroristic maniac lied to me" is so rapid shes so funny/stupid

The imagery in this book is kinda crazy. Fire and ice cats and drowning in darkness visions. Very fun.

Sign of the Moon

So the med cats are divided and split up and StarClan does not trust any other Clan cat- but when in StarClan, Barkface and Flametail are hanging out? Crookedstar offers to share prey with Yellowfang? But StarClan is super fractured rn each Clan must stand alone. Okay

Antpelt nooooooooooooooo

Idk what the mountain prophecy actually means like. Firestar was always going to lead ThunderClan into battle.... what is he gonna do that's different...

Rock: i was the first Stoneteller Five chapters later Half Moon becomes the first Stoneteller. This is egregious

Swoop death. that's the fourth death Dovewing is going to be haunted by

The Forgotten Warrior

all the hints to Hollyleaf still... its a nice throughline... the yarrow and tansy and Molepaw/Cherrypaw scenes... shes my fave. sometimes the foreshadowing feels like it could be just Jayfeather coping that she's 'defo still out there' but TFW ties it up well. especially when you get surprised by Sol coming back and its like 'oh they were convinced she was defo still out there :(' and then she's actually back!!!

also the title??? is banger. the Forgotten Warrior, with Leafpool on the OG cover??? wow. espec as its constantly brought up that Leafpool was the medicine cat but no one sees her as a warrior really.... TBH all these titles are just as good as the TPB titles in terms of meaning/how good they are.

Another fox? okay.

SOL.... okay

tunnel adventures part 3.

All this like.. Bumeblstripeing is just kinda naff. Dovewing is clearly tryna force herself into liking him. But then she's also going on about how Tigerheart used her??? NGL i do really wanna see like.. why she changes her mind in AVOS

Brambleclaw lying to protect Hollyleaf is actually like. GOD that hurts. especially when you consider Bramblestar's Storm and how much he misses her. thats his favourite

the cinderheart shit is so stupid my jaw is actually on the floor. what you do mean you've been in love with a cat you shouldn't have. is cinderheart having cinderpelt's feelings for fucking firestar and that's why she doesn't want to be with lionblaze. also they have negative chemistry they literally are CONSTANTLY having issues.

oh my god i swear the 'Sol is secretly working with WindClan' was brought up chapters ago and we are only now dealing with it okay. anyway hollyleaf moment.

its kinda weird we dont get any like. scenes of the siblings just being siblings... they only discuss prophecy/plot shit and dont get to be siblings again - which i guess fits with the whole 'everything has changed' but god it'd be so god to just have them doing like. normal cat stuff - especially when so much of this series has had Jayfeather missing her and Lionblaze

i love Dustpelt and Brackenfur building shit... its so good

Dawnpelt murder accusations. okay.... i can't wait for Flametail to suddenly be argumentative again next book

the battle we've been building to all book is one chapter. cool. Sol runs off again and it's the end of the book. cool.

[unluckiestmember]

Goldi (Puss In Boots) X GN! Reader

Characters: Goldilocks, Baby Bear, Mama Bear and Papa Bear (Puss In Boots).

Tags: Fluff, family dynamics, robberies/heists, physical affection, sibling bickers and teasing.

Warning: None. SFW.

A/N: Yes, I went to see Puss In Boots: The Last Wish TWO times in theatres. Yes, I love Goldi and her family and yes she almost stole the movie from everyone. Sue me! XD

Goldi is definitely someone who will show off to her lover.

If you tag along on a heist, she’ll perform tricks and deliver playful banter like there’s no tomorrow.

Hope you’re ready for her family to tease you on and off expeditions.

Though you’re allowed on missions, Goldi will try her best to make sure you don’t get hurt or killed.

If she sees a single scratch on you, she’s going feral on who caused it.

For the most part, Goldilocks is someone who is playful in public, especially when she’s making a great heist with her family.

Behind closed doors on the other hand? She’s like a big grizzly bear of love.

She’ll snuggle into you when you spend the night at her place.

If you’re too cold, she’ll hold you close and warm you both up as much as she can.

If you’re too hot, she’ll make sure to do anything to cool you off.

Due to being new to dating, she’ll always ask her Mama and Papa advice on how to be a good girlfriend for you.

Even if they assure her she’s already perfect, she’ll still ask for ways to impress and woo you.

Yes, Baby teases and messes with you a lot. Yes, Goldi beats him up everytime.

If you are of royalty, Goldi can’t promise she’ll live up to expectations.

But she does promise to try her best to be proper around others for you.

For how long though is the real question.

No matter what, if you two are dating, you better pass the vibe test with her family.

If you fail, there’s no way they’re letting you near their family.

And if you pass, then good news! You can be Goldi’s lover and a part of the family!

Goldi’s love language is physical affection and gift giving.

If you perform and accomplish a huge robbery just to get a priceless jewel for Goldi, she’ll be wanting to ask for you hand in seconds!

And if you hug her tight and give her the sweetest of kisses, she’ll become putty.

Goldi will go through thick and thin with her family just for you.

You make her heart swell up so much.

You’re too nice.

You’re too sweet.

You’re just right.

Likes and retweets are highly appreciated! I love you all, stay safe and have a good day! <3

[hazshit-hotel-hater]

What are your opinions on each of the songs? (you can answer with as much or as little detail as you'd like)

Big shocker that the songs from the 2 good episodes are in S and the only one that isn’t is still B tier/sar

The first 2 songs in S made me either tear up/shake violently or cry, and therefore they deserve to be up there IMO. Out for love is also just genuinely catchy and had actual build up to it. Also God “Ready for This” just. OOUGGGHHH IT SCRATCHES MY BRAIN SO GOOD LIKE A WARRIOR CATS MAP. I like it a lot. You cant have multiple characters sing about working together and expect me to NOT cry.

“Stayed Gone” isn’t one I listen to often but it’s so peppy and fast and full of hatred I can’t help but enjoy it. Also everytime the song starts my brain does this

I dont know anything about Welcome Home

I have. Issues. With “Loser, Baby” but aside from those the song holds a lot more weight to it than I usually give it credit for. And for as cheesy as the start if it is, the line before of Angel talking about self destructing resonates with me a lot. Also Husk lays down in a puddle of vomit and no one talks about that ever.

I think the first song in B is “Happy Day in Hell” and I’m adding it there 1. Because it is the first song 2. It gets a reprise thing 3. Charlie almost gets hit by a truck. Other than that it’s not really my favourite but I respect the impact it has.

“Hell is Forever” just fucks. End of story. Alex Brightman killed it.

“Respectless” is good I love Velvette’s VA, but the sudden start of the song and the ending are so out of left field the first time me and my friends watched this show we had to pause cause we lost our fucking minds. Could’ve been better but I’d listen to it again, yeah.

“Hell’s Greatest Dad” is silly and funny and maybe I’m biased as a violin player and jazz enjoyer but a lot of the instrumental tickles my brain so nicely. I will say though it confuses me so much because why does Alastor care about being seen as a father figure?? My mom said it could just be him wanting to show up Lucifer and that’s it but I dunno.

“More than Anything (Reprise)” AKA “Charlie and Veggie Kiss Scene - Hazbin Hotel”

This song sounds like it’s straight out of Barbie & Th Diamond Castle and I’m honestly pissed the girls in the movie didn’t kiss so I’m coping with this. ALSO THE FACT ITS A REPRISED SONG ABOUT LOVE MAKES ME A BIT CRAZY. I never noticed this was the same song Lucifer sang to Charlie SOMEHOW but that’s actually really cute.

“It Starts With Sorry” Has a big part in Sir Pentious’s character growth and just his character in general. I’ve been working on this in my Pentious rant but I never see people mention how much this song probably meant to him. Yeah it’s super corny, but he was fully expecting to be killed and had just been told to kill himself. This was definitely huge for him and I’m not gonna be convinced otherwise.

“You Didn’t Know” is really good but Lute’s part is by far the best and I pray to GOD she gets her own song in S2 her voice actor can SING. GODDAMN! I am very interested in Lute’s character development and I love seeing what people do with close-minded characters like that and hopefully Vivzie doesn’t condemn her to Vivziepop Woman Syndrome. If she isn’t important in S2 I’m going to be pissed but I dunno maybe S3 if we get one.

“More Than Anything” Wish my dad was like this! This song is incredibly sweet and I appreciate it a lot. Honestly might go way higher on the list if I keep thinking about it.

“Whatever It Takes” Sorry you will never be Imagine Dragons. Vaggie doesn’t sound anything like herself cause her VA is making her voice so much more gruff for her character, which is fine! I like her voice (the voice direction is not very good but I digress) it’s just her voice is so high in this I can’t even tell it’s Vaggie.

“Welcome to Heaven” is boring, but we got a Molly cameo!

“Poison”. Read this and this and this. -10/10. I’d rather make out violently with Elon Musk.

[cowboybeepboop]

R u mine?

“Will you go out with me,”

“Well you fucked me multiple times, so i guess a date wouldnt be too bad,”

Part one ☝️ can be read as a stand-alone tho I think

Pairing: Steve Harrington x fem! Reader

Genre: plot with some porn

Word count: 3627

Summary: neither of you wanted just a one night stand, but you were too stubborn to admit to it.

Warnings: jealous steve, gross sex (and not in the fun way), Sex with Tommy Hagan, there is like no cheating between any of the characters (Steve and reader, tommy and carol), degradation, semi public sex, choking, name calling, hair pulling, the degradation randomly turning into praise, my work is never proof-read

A/N: In this eddie isn't dead and like the upside down isn't mentioned like ever. Theres also like a scene with Tommy Hagan and like some very awkward sex between him and reader. I would also like to say that I normally do not post series and this is going to be the last part. However, if you guys would like to be tagged in any future steve related smut, you're free to comment or pm me <3

It’s been two weeks. A whole two weeks since your fuck-a-thon with none other than your sisters bestfriend. And god, it was all you could think of.

Fuck he was the first guy to ever bring you to orgasm. He’s so goddamn perfect, everything he did for you, he's all you think about day and night.

The pair of you have decided to try and pretend Robin didn't catch you sharing a bed half-naked, or at least she thought you were half-naked. Thankfully, Rob can be very dense sometimes and she thought nothing of it. Even though you were covered in hickeys and he had scratches all down his back, but who knows, maybe she just didn't notice.

Steve has done unbelievably well with pretending nothing happened, but for you it’s nearly impossible. Everytime you see him your heart pounds and your cunt aches.

Youre sort of angry with him, I mean, why the fuck hasn’t he even mentioned anything. Yes, of course you agreed to never speak of it, but still, the man came inside of you. Doesn't that mean anything to him?

You’re angrily chewing on your bottom lip, tapping your pen against the table, fuck that shit. You should’ve known, it’s Steve fucking Harrington. He’s known to just fuck around, but you know what, two can play at that game.

“Hey Robby,” you pout to your sister, who looks up at you.

“What is it? You've barely even been paying attention, I've been cheating this whole time and you don't even care?” she narrows her eyes at you tossing the yahtzee dice at you.

“Sorry, I know, it’s just that my mind was elsewhere,” you sigh, giving her puppy dog eyes, she rolls hers in response.

“Whatever, I get it,” she huffs while crossing her arms over her chest.

“We should go to a party tonight,” your eyes light up with your idea and she scratches her neck.

“Y/N, you know parties aren't my thing,” Robin stretches.

“Yeah but it could be fun, plus I heard that Carol is throwing some epic party at her parents lake house tonight,” you throw your arms around her neck, giving her a soft kiss on the cheek.

“Ew, why the hell would you want to go to one of her parties?” she pushes you away, “plus we have that camping trip with my friends tomorrow, I don’t think that showing up hungover is the best idea.”

“We both know that Jonathan is going to be high off his ass with Argyle and Eddie, who cares if I’m a little hungover?” pursing your lips you continue giving her puppy dog eyes.

“Okay, fine. We can go, but I’m calling Steve and Eddie to see if they’ll take us. I don’t want you getting drunk and lost.” you clench your jaw.

“Jesus it happened one time. Would you let it go already?” you glare at your younger sister while she laughs softly.

“Well, whatever. Can you help me get ready? I don't really know how to dress for those kinds of events.” robin follows you up the stairs keeping at your heels.

“Yes! Of course,” you perk up in excitement, “my baby girl is all grown up,” you squish her cheeks and push her to the edge of your bed before searching your closet for a skimpy dress. You know it’s definitely not what Robin was wanting, but it's probably what she was expecting, you’re all for people exploring their sexuality. Which is why you were shocked to find that Rob wasn’t all that interested in meaningless hookups, but then again, not everyone can be as careless as you. Plus it's probably better that she's staying safe.

“Okay, so I know this isn't exactly something you'd normally go for, but..” you hand her a keyhole red halter top and a black pleather mini-skirt. “It's a little showy for you, however, it's so hot. I mean goddamn, you'll have every girl swooning for you. Promise.” Robin flushes deep red.

“Are you sure?” she looks extremely unsure, “ i don't want to look like an out of place weirdo..” she looks all around the room avoiding my eyes.

“Robin, shut the fuck up, youre absolutely stunning. It doesn’t matter if it's not your normal style, you're beautiful in everything.” your eyebrows furrow.

She breathes a sigh of relief, “okay, i'll change right now.'' Robin is a little insecure but she knows she'll survive.

__________

About an hour and a half later, Robin has secured your ride and you’ve finished getting yourself ready. You were so glad Robin insisted that Steve accompany you to the party. It makes your plan that much easier to execute.

You knew for a fact that Tommy Hagan would be at the party, even if it's his ex girlfriends. He NEVER misses a good party and he can NEVER resist a girl dressed in green. Which is exactly why you chose an extremely short sparkly green dress with a semi see-through top. You even wore a matching green lace set underneath, you weren't sure how far you planned to take it but if anything Tommy is a good distraction right?

The sound of Eddie's van pulling into your driveway fills the silent living room, sucking in a deep breath as you stick your hands into your bra, pulling your tits up making sure they don't look anything less than perfect. Fuck Steve. God you want to fuck Steve so bad.

Robin lets the boys inside, offering them some water or snacks as you finish getting ready. A smirk paints itself on your features as you trample down the stairs.

“Rob, stop trying to stall. Let’s go,” you link arms with her pulling her out the door. You were completely oblivious to the pair of brown eyes glued to your ass.

“Jesus Steve, dont cream your pants just yet.” Eddie pushes Harrington's shoulder lightly before jogging to the driver's side of his van. “Hurry up before we leave,” Steve rolls his eyes, speed walking to the vehicle.

__________

About 30 minutes into the party you're tipsy and dancing with the still sober Robin, that is until an orange haired girl pulls her off to the side to talk with her. Puffing your cheeks, you continue dancing. The alcohol running through your veins gave you more confidence than usual. Soon enough a pair of strong warm hands found themselves on your hips.

You didn't even have to turn around, you knew exactly who it was. Tommy. His sickening cologne said it all, but desperate times call for desperate measures. You push your ass against him, grinding against his hard on, you throw your head against his shoulder allowing him to run his hands all over your body.

His lips find their way to your neck pressing sloppy kisses all over the place, his hand moves down your stomach and then the hem of your skirt. Tommy spins you around, placing his hands on your ass while you wrap your arms around his neck.

“Let's find a room,” you bite your lip while giving him a seductive look, “sound good big boy?” you lick your bottom lip while rubbing your leg against his crotch.

“Fuck yeah,” tommy wraps a hand around your wrist, guiding you into an empty bathroom.

Unfortunately or fortunately, Steve saw this exchange and followed the two of you. Tommy closed and locked the door before he could stop you from going in with him. Harrington clenches his fists, for a while he contemplates breaking the door down.

What the hell were you thinking? If you needed a good time you should have gone to him, rather than tommy the fucking prick hagan.

Tommy was sucking hard hickeys onto your breasts and shoulders while awkwardly slamming his dick inside you. He’s too fucking thick to realize that youre bone dry and youre not enjoying a single second of this exchange.

You continue to fake enjoyment regardless, moaning loud “Yes! Yes! Tommy, right there” and “I’m so close”, he roughly shoves your head against the wall as he speeds up. God it felt like he was starting a fire inside you, and not in a good way. He finally cums, you pretend to have an orgasm as he leans against you trying to catch his breath.

“We should do that again soon,” he winks at you, the second he unlocks the door Steve slams it open.

“Tommy get the fuck out. Now.” you've never been scared of steve before, but the look of pure rage in his eyes has you trying to make yourself invisible. Hagan leaves with a huff.

“Steve, she isn't some sort of property. Didn't mommy ever teach you to share your toys,” he chuckles as the door slams in his face. You hop off the sink, crossing your arms over your chest shooting a glare at steve.

“What the fuck,” you push a finger into his chest, “why are you so fucking worked up. Mind your own business honey.” slipping your panties back on your reach for the doorknob, Steve blocks you from the door. His eyes scanning your face, he relaxes his jaw slightly, trying to calm himself down.

“Are you fucking drunk?” he whisper yells at you, “What the hell, youre supposed to be the responsible one. Robin is worried fucking sick and youre up here fucking some douche in the bathroom. For fucks sake Y/N. why are you so fucking reckless.'' His stern voice sends chills down your body.

“Steve, get out of my way,” you maintain eye contact, baling your hands up into fists.

“Fine,” he moves out of the way, letting you walk out. You slam the door and stomp down the stairs, Steve runs his hand through his hair. He notices the soiled condom in the trash and kicks the bin so hard it breaks. “FUCK.” he yells.

You managed to find Eddie and Robin in a small corner which is a little secluded. “Hey, Y/N have you seen Steve?” your sister questions with flushed cheeks, she's tripping over her own feet, quite obviously tipsy.

“No, I haven’t. But maybe you and I should get fresh air while Eds looks for him, hm?” she nods, wrapping her arms around your neck. You guide her out the door, helping her into the back of the van. She lays down, putting her head in your lap.

__________

Eddie shows up an hour late, making up some dumb excuse about what took so long. Rovin definitely didn't mind the extra sleep, you helped him load up your stuff before climbing in the back of the van with nance and jonathan.

It's kinda awkward seeing him again after the last conversation you had. You knew for a fact that he told nancy so as soon as eddie runs back inside to help robin get the beers you guys bought for the trip you burst out.

“Look i didnt mean anything, it was some stupid dare that harrington gave me. I would hate for you guys to get the wrong idea.” you stare at the floor with a deep blush spreading on your cheeks.

“I figured as much, you were the first person to encourage us to get together, I doubt you'd try and break us apart.” Nancy gives you a sweet smile patting your shoulder softly. A relieved expression finds its way onto your face, robin hops into the van next to you.

“OK, just one more stop and then we'll be on our way to the campsite.” Eddie smiles in the mirror, brushing his bangs behind his ear.

You really, really don't want to see Harrington, like at all. So you decide to fake a nap against the robin before you actually fall asleep.

Steve was restless in the passenger seat, the peaceful look on your face was driving him insane. His mind wanders back to earlier this morning, the second he got home he grabbed the panties he previously stole and fucked his fist with them wrapped around his hard dick.

He honestly lost count of how many times he came into your panties, he was furious. Especially with himself, its not like he was your boyfriend, he had no right to be so pissed that you were fucking someone else.

But for fucks sake, he was in the same house as you. Couldn't you have had the decency to leave with Tommy or even better, hook up with some other asshole. Steve was beyond jealous, he just barely fulfilled his fantasy of making love to you.

__________

“Okay so we have three tents,” Nancy taps her chin, “who wants to stay with who, Jon and I are obviously sharing,” Jonathan smiles warmly while wrapping an arm around his girlfriend.

“As much as I enjoy your friendship, I think it’d be uncomfortable having both of us in the same tent,” Eddie says to Steve, patting his shoulder with a coy smirk.

“Yeah you're right, maybe we can share a tent,'' Robin locks arms with eddie.

“So Y/N and Steve, you've got to share the last tent,” he folds his arms over his chest.

“I’ll just sleep outside,” he clenches his jaw and walks off to get “firewood”.

You roll your eyes, where does he get off acting like such a douche bag. Eddie follows Harrington, Jonathan continues putting together his and Nancy’s tent.

“What the hell is that all about?” Nancy questions, crossing her arms over her chest, furrowing her eyebrows.

“Yeah, what happened with you guys last night?” Robin questions with a soft tone. Her eyes filled with worry, she chews on her bottom lip.

“It’s nothing, he just walked in on tommy and i after we,” you smirk softly, “after he thought he gave me the best sex of my life,” you laugh.

“Why did you hook up with him?” the girl's face contorts in disgust while you just shrug.

“I dunno, he was just there,” you plop down on a foldable chair, “it wasn't even worth it though.'' Nancy laughs loudly.

“Of course it was shit, it’s fucking Tommy Hagan.” Robin smiles wide.

__________

Jonathan and eddie have gotten high off their asses, laughing at dumb shit even the fucking trees. Steve is talking to Robin, ignoring your presence.

“Hey guys, imma head to bed,” you cover your mouth yawning silently, they all tell you goodnight. You smile before unzipping the tent, slipping in and zipping it back up. You change into some skimpy lingerie, I know really not the most practical but you suck at actually doing laundry so you’ll have to survive, sneaking under the covers you sigh.

Shivers run down your spine, as rain starts to lightly pour down. You can hear Nancy and Robin scolding Steve and yelling at him to go inside your tent.

“Whatever, fine I’ll go in, just get out of the fucking rain.” Steve's voice is right outside the tent, you suck in a deep breath turning to face the side of the tent. Harrington pulls the zipper carefully, trying to not wake you up, “Shit,” he whispers as he pulls his shoes off.

Your body is shaking uncontrollably, the cold mixed with your stupid lace nightie and the lack of body warmth in the stupid tent. “Hey, are you still awake?” you bite your tongue, squeezing your eyes shut tightly hoping he doesn't notice you're faking it.

“Goddamn it dumbass,” he pulls his sleeping bag on top of yours, throwing the thick blanket he brought along over you. “You’re freezing your fucking ass off,” steve slides into your sleeping bag, pushing his body into yours.

His breathing regulates as he snores softly, you stay wide awake with heat building in your panties, biting down on your lip you sink your hand into your panties. Running your index and middle fingers though your folds, pressing hard circles into your clit, the pleasure has your eyebrows furrowing, eyes closing and desperate pants falling from your lips.

This is probably the most horny you've ever been, no matter what you've never stooped to this level. You've never fantasized about someone while they were right there, right next to you with their hands under your breast, the emotions are just too overwhelming, you just want him.

Using your free hand you cover your mouth trying to hold back moans, leaning your head back you insert a finger into your hole. “Princess, what are you doing?” Steve whispers into your ear, you cease all movements, his hands move up squeezing your boobs roughly. “Was it not enough that you fucked Tommy last night? Are you that big of a slut?” his hand slips into your panties he pulls your hand away and he pushes two fingers into your cunt.

A loud moan rings in the air, Steve wraps his hand around your neck, “Careful Princess, wouldn't want everyone to know just how much of a whore you are,” biting down on your lip you try to stay quiet. Harrington finger fucks you roughly, rubbing your clit with his thumb, keeping his animalistic pace.

“Pathetic slut,” his voice comes out in a hiss as you cum around his fingers, eyes rolling into the back of your head as your toes curl. Steve pulls his pants off, palming thick cock through his boxers, “suck me off Y/N” he grabs a handful of your hair pulling you close to his crotch. You pull down his boxers wrapping both hands around his cock, pushing the tip in your mouth slowly bobbing your head.

“Good girl, just like that,” he pushes your head down softly causing you to gag on his length. Steve groans, throwing his head against his pillow allowing his hips to buck into your mouth, your eyes begin to water. His pace starts to grow sloppy, your throat becoming sore, he pulls you up on his chest.

“Fuck why are you wearing that?” he pulls your nightie off causing your nipples to pebble instantly, his hands rest on your sides as he grinds you down on him.

“I forgot to do laundry,” you say softly, “do you have a condom?” he smirks.

“Yeah in my wallet,” you grab his wallet as Steve takes his shirt off, he's decided you're taking too long. Harrington creeps up behind you, kissing your spine gently, his hands wrap around to squeeze your boobs.

“Steve, be patient.” you grab the gold foil wrapper and put it in steve's hand, you put his wallet back away and crawl over to him. Watching him slide the rubber over his throbbing cock, you throw your panties over by the pile of clothes, he motions for you to come closer.

“Y/N get over here,” your heart rate increases as his hands rest on your hips, pushing his dick into your soaked pussy, a quiet gasp rings through the silent tent. “You’ll have to be quiet,'' Steve says sternly, furrowing his eyebrows as he lays his head against his pillow, having you riding him was enough to kill him.

You pick up your pace, grinding your hips against Steves, the echoing sound of your skins slapping could probably be heard twenty feet away. Harrington didn't care, whenever you slowed your pace he would grip your ass and bounce it on his cock, making sure to fill you with pleasure.

Steve uses his middle and pointer finger to rub sloppy circles into your sensitive nub, causing your body to jerk forward and your eyes to flutter shut, soft moans fill his ears. You wrap your arms around his neck, biting down on his shoulder to keep quiet, he runs his hand through your hair pulling your head back.

His eyes narrow in on the reddish-purple marks Tommy left the night before, his jaw goes slack, he flips you on your back. He sucks rough marks all over your neck, he fucks into you furiously, the whole tent around you moving back and forth along with steve.

“You like that? Fucking slut,” he wraps a hand around your throat squeezing just enough to make you gasp for air.

Steve throws his head back in pleasure, you begin to tighten up around him drawing out a long groan. “Steve,” you chant his name, “more, please I need more,”, he complies with your desires and angles your bodies so he hits even deeper.

“I’m gonna cum,” you moan into his ear, he slows down pulling you against his chest, you climax around him. Steve bucks up into you one last time before he cums, filling the condom. He pulls out, takes off the condom and ties the top, he quickly gets dressed.

You begin to stress, once he opens the zipper to the tent you're still sat naked, fully exposed to the cold air. It begins to feel like there's something stuck in the back of your throat, Steve comes back into the tent, zipping it back up.

“Why didn't you get dressed, you're freezing,'' Steve pulls his sweatshirt off and puts it on for you, wrapping his arms around your waist. “I have a question for you,” he chews his lip while looking into your eyes.

“What is it?” you play with the sleeves of his favorite sweater before slipping under the covers once again.

“Will you go out with me,” Steve cracks his neck before following suit and laying next to you.

“Well you fucked me multiple times, so i guess a date wouldnt be too bad,” he smiles pulling you against him, burying your head into his chest.

“Goodnight Y/N,” he whispers into your ear before kissing the top of your head.

@urs-angel @thesebitcheslovesosadotcom

[purpdrawsthings]

What’s up with those static eyes? And what jobs do each of you do for the most part?

Also, to Mr. Puzzles, why have them work like this instead of as brainwashed actors?

WARNING : THIS IS NOT FINISHED! This is merely a wip I posted on accident. So some stuff may come off as weird.

My apologies ^^'

SMG4 : We uh...

SMG3 : We don't really know.

SMG4 : It just appeared right after we signed the contract I think?... Maybe it's a side effect? A mark? Who knows...

SMG4 : Now about that job part, I usually take lead in script writing cuz... I'm just the lead script writer. Other than that, my other main job is just being an actor. Other than those, I help 3 in taking care of the pets, I'm basically the mascot of the studio [ besides Mr. Puzzles ] and just an assistant.

SMG3 : looks off to him, still concerned on why tf he still has that many jobs Uuuuuuh, anyways, I help 4 with the scripts, I'm basically the person who mostly takes care of the pets, I'm also the cameraman and... Just an actor. But mostly the taking care of the pets thing and cameraman.

SMG4 : I think Meggy is a choreography teacher or something... Tari is a bug finder because of her abilities... Boopkins is is just a postman guy... Bob just guards the weapons room. Mario... Doesn't even do anything, besides acting.

SMG3 : Makes sense.

Mr. Puzzles : Why? Well... Why should I tell you folks that? Just because you all get to ask me questions doesn't mean you can sometimes pry into some secretive and personal stuff. So don't bother asking!

[ ok, time for context part!

Yeah so, everytime an ask gets answered, I'll leave a context part if necessary for those who don't understand or need more info.

So for the first one, the eyes were just some design choice at first but I decided to add some stuff about it. These static like eyes were some sign that "hey, these guys are owned =D". Maybe some sort of trademark, well, that's the thought I had to mind. Tho, other characters besides 4 and 3 have different ways of showing this. Tari from example, hides her left eye cuz it was dripping a lot and also, she just didn't really like showing it. Other than that, it was a coolio design choice.

For the second one, I'll just put it in some format here. Oh and btw, I'm not afraid to change these if necessary.

SMG4 : Puzzles assistant/Lead Script Writer/Main mascot/Part time-pet caretaker/actor

SMG3 : Assistant script writer/Lead pet caretaker/cameraman/actor

Meggy : Choreography teacher/law assistant [ incase of legal action ofc ]/Prop setup helper/actor

Tari : Bug finder/Assistant for visuals/actor

Boopkins : Prop setup helper/sender [ aka postman or something ]/Guard assistant/actor

Bob : Lead guard for the weapons room [ yes that exists lmao ]/Part time cameraman/Actor

Mario : Actor

Mario doesn't even get to do much considering with Puzzles giving him some freedom over his actions, he can do some random ass shit. Mario just spends his time in his room, memorizing scripts and probably just eating spaghetti so that he would calm down. [ this is subjected to change... ]

Puzzles just felt a lil lonely. Imagine you control everyone but all of them are just mindless and emotionless people? Yeah, that's gonna be boring sooner or later.

Fun fact : Puzzles actually has some empathy for them after a few months of working with them. But to maintain his image, he never told anyone about this. ]

[kormiato]

hi can u do one where how they would react when reader takes off rheir shirt and it reveals like a hella fit body w abs also inazuma girls(fem please<3)

Hi! Ofc I can, I'd love to! Hope you'll be satisfied! (Btw I was a little confused because you didn't mention which specific characters you want to see, but that's okay, I think.) Also if you want me to do part 2 with other characters, you can just ask and, if that's not too much trouble, please, mention which ones characters you want to see. <3 (Sorry for long wait, I was sick and then was busy with school, haha... Also sorry for any mistakes in text.)

Inazuma girls reacting on you taking off your shirt revealing a fit body (F! Reader)

Characters: Ei, Yae Miko, Sangonomiya Kokomi.

Ei

You always liked how Ei is when she's fighting. So strong and powerful, so elegant and fast, so serious and determined. She was incredible, to be honest. You admired her everytime when you asked her to show some of her training. You always sit on the floor not too far away but to be in a safe zone and look. Your elegant and soft Ei was turning into a merciless soldier, focusing on her battle with a puppet because only Raiden Shogun is able to keep up with her destructive rhythmic pace.

They fight for hours before Ei hops back raising her sword and says "Enough for now." and Shogun nods before leave. Then Ei always approaches you and sits down near you with a light smile on her face when she notices your adored gaze. She listens to your excitement about how awesome she was back there and tells you stories from her past.

That day was exact the same. But today you wanted to do something. And the thought itself was making you squirm on the floor in anticipation of the end of the training.

When the training was over, Ei sat down near you and sligtly smiled as she saw your smile. "That was SO cool, Ei!" you said. "Can you teach me something of that?" that slightly startled Ei. You? Wish to train? You was so sweet, so fragile in her eyes, she wanted to protect you from all the evil. But yet, she wants you to be happy, so your wish is her command. "Okay, if you want so," she said, making you jump out of excitement. She stood up with you. "Let's see how skillful you are first, alright? I won't be too hard on you." Ei said with the sword in her hand as she waits for you to take one of the swords in the room.

But what she didn't expect is for you to take your shirt off. Her eyes got a little wider as she didn't know the purpose of it. Her eyes wandered along your torso, abs. White crop top looks good on your surprisingly fit body. Ei could feel the heat on her cheeks as you throwed your shirt on your seat spot and started limbering up. Wow. You looked pretty much stronger now and less fragile than she thought before. Your little smile was sweet as always, but now more determined, confident.

As you done preparing for the little sparring, you grabbed one of the swords and took a fighting stand in front of Ei. She, on the other hand, shook her head to stop staring at you because, Dear Archons, you really looked surprisingly beautiful and strong. And if there's something that Ei likes in human, it's strength and determination. And you looked pretty determined and excited.

Let's just say that the training went very calm and relaxed and after this Ei sat down and asked about where you learned to fight and get that fit body. No naughty intentions, she really is just curious.

Yae Miko

It was a pretty busy day for the shrine, everyone was busy with something: cleaning, helping people that was coming from time to time. You came to visit Yae and you really didn't know why you was with Yae Miko in one of the shrine's rooms, but one look at her was enough for you to know that she's up for no good. She just suddenly took your hand once she saw you and led you in the shrine without greeting or even explanation. And now she stood up in front of you with her usual playful and sly smirk. You looked like a bunny, cornered by a fox. Her hands were behind her back, she clearly holds something in them. "Um... Miko? What are you up to now?" you asked, making her playful smirk get wider as she let out a soft chuckle, looking right into your eyes.

And then she hands you folded clothes. And suddenly you realized what she wants. She wanted you to help her in the shrine, because they were running out of free hands. You let out soft "Oh..." that made her giggle. "Well? Are you up to it?" Miko asked, raising her eyebrow. You only laughed light heartedly and nodded. "Fine, I'll help." You took the clothes and turned your back to her to change your clothes.

As you took your shirt off, Miko hums with playful surprise and that makes you turn to face her with a raised eyebrow in a silent question. Yae smiled slyly with a soft chuckle as her eyes admired your form as you stood there in your bra. "Something's wrong?" you asked. Yae shook her head with a smile. "Nothing. I just didn't expect my little flower to look so strong and beautiful. You look pretty amazing," she says with a slight sparkle in her eyes, and her words made you blush slightly as you quickly turned around and continued changing your clothes. Your blush didn't go unnoticed by Yae Miko and that made her laugh in amusement. "Clearly precious little flower. Guess I'll need to watch closely so no one will try to take you away from me because of how adorable and stunning you are." She adds with a sly smirk.

All the time you walked on the territory of the shrine, you always could feel her looking at you. But at least no one bothered you or made you uncomfortable.

Sangonomiya Kokomi

Kokomi was coming home pretty tired last few days. You was understanding, she has a lot of work to do everyday, but you still hated to see your beloved in such state. So you took care of her every single day when she was like this: cooking her favorite meal, preparing a hot bath for her or giving her a massage as she falls asleep from your loving and gentle touch that never failed to make her worries and troubles melt away and just feel safe, relaxed and at home.

But today she managed to take a little day off to just relax and spend some more time with you. Finally, you had a pleasure of seeing her face instead of empty side of the bed when you woke up. She was sleeping peacefully, her lips slightly parted as her breathing slow and calm. You looked at her for a couple of minutes before standing up to cook her a breakfast. You already got whole day planned for both of you, you wanted it to be lazy day, but still fun and interesting.

After both of you ate your breakfast, you decided to watch some TV and after whole day filled with cuddles, movies and eating snacks, you asked Kokomi if she wants to go and swim a little, and you was ecstatic when she agreed. You both grabbed your swimsuits (you also grabbed your sword, because it can be unsafe and you will always make sure to protect your precious girl) and after some time you both was on the shore.

You was happy to see Kokomi smiling because the place was quiet and so beautiful.

While she was admiring the view, you decided to take your casual clothes off, because you both put on your swimsuits under your clothes before heading out to this place. (sorry, I really rarely go to swim even at the summertime, so this can be quite unlogical)

When Kokomi turned to face you, her jaw dropped. You was standing in your swim suit, and damn your body looked pretty fit and strong. You looked like her own bodyguard now, not like her girlfriend. She looked you up and down, her face getting pretty red.

"Wow, my lovely, you look beautiful." Kokomi muttered, looking to the side, feeling a little flustered now. You only giggled, standing a little closer to her and leaving soft kiss on her forehead. "Thanks, Kokomi. Now let's have fun and swim, shall we?" You said gently. Kokomi nodded and took off her own casual clothes, standing in her swim suit as well. You gently took her hand in yours and then started running towards the water, making her laugh and laughing along. It was pretty memorible day off for both you and Kokomi.

(Kokomi deserves the best of cuddles and comfort, she's so pretty, omg...)

[ricksanchezbignaturals]

i already touched on it in my post on the new episode, but i wanted to talk a bit more about viewing unity through a queer lense. warning this post is long and possibly incomprehensible because im sick.

ive always thought it kind of wild that so many people missed the memo about rick being pansexual when the first explicit partner of his we get to meet is unity (i say explicit because birdperson shows up before unity, and while i do believe rick is definitely meant to be into him, you wouldn't know that from his first appearance and it's not clear if c137 ever had romantic/sexual relations with bp or if it was purely unrequited). it seems obvious to me that there was queer shit going on in auto erotic assimilation, so rnm fans being all homophobic seems puzzling, because that episode came out in 2015. queer shit going on in this show is not new, why do people act surprised everytime it happens? to be honest, the new episode gave me a bit of clarity there.

so, a relationship with unity being queer might be obvious to me and my fellow gays, but it is played very safe. the majority of rick's interactions with unity are through female bodies it inhabits, and especially the main sort of ambassador lady. it almost feels like she is unity first and foremost, with all the other bodies it has being some cool power of hers, an offshoot of that one specific alien rather than equal parts of who unity is.

and yknow, that's clearly intentional, nobody ever went broke for appealing to straight men, but there is something there. i do think the choice to make the first serious relationship the audience gets to see from your main character be with a hivemind that assimilates regardless of gender is a cool one. because like i said in the other post, that makes being with unity a sort of pansexual microcosm. the first episode had a couple nods to rick not exclusively sleeping with the female bodies under unity's control, and i think this new episode was worse about making unity basically feel like it is mainly supposed to be that one alien. unity gets called she/her a lot in this episode, but there was that one line "don't talk to them like that" which i found... interesting.

it is possible im overthinking unity's pronouns. hell, i have multiple sets of pronouns, and im not even a hivemind. but that specific line did seem like, idk, intentional? yknow like when the pronouns were inconsistent in the first episode that was coming from morty and summer who were just meeting unity. i don't think rick even used pronouns to refer to unity in the first episode, but in the new one that's what he says to curtis, who's talking to unity through The Main Alien Lady. "don't talk to them like that" while later he uses she/her when talking to wong. unity's pronouns come across to me as written for the queer folks to catch the ~vibe~ and the straight folks to not have to notice at the same time.

honestly a lot of unity comes across that way. at the same time it can be this genderless entity experiencing life through many bodies, but also maybe more like one woman who happens to be able to control a planet's worth of people. and yeah, i get it. everybody wants to make the gays happy but nobody wants to lose the straights business. if rick's ever allowed to have a more explicit queer relationship than the referenced history with nimbus, that'll piss some people off. rick and morty fans in particular have a penchant for being intense and sometimes they're weird about minorities even though rick is one like 3 times over.

so like, i loved this new episode a lot, but i do feel like there was a missed opportunity to be a bit more ballsy with unity. i don't think it should've been represented by the same body as last time, that makes it feel like just another sexy alien lady for rick to have the hots for and i think it can be more interesting than that, yknow?