#Fun fact I bought these in the UK!

[stick-by-me]

It's getting serious 💥

New follower sticker for: @m0ths0ft!

[anyroads]

OK you know what, if we're gonna talk about Bake Off then fuck it, let's do this.

It used to be this wholesome, lovely show! We used to watch it for the bakers! And the learning! And the light banter and occasional bit of coy innuendo! What happened?

Channel 4 happened. When they bought the show they made a number of changes, most of them Not Good™️. Not just in the sense of them resulting in a lot of 😬 and 🫠 moments, but in the sense of how they changed the show's purpose, atmosphere, and brand.

Look, I know most people are just like, "whatever, it's just a baking show," and yeah, sure. But it's one of the UK's most successful TV exports, and where it once shifted the tone of reality competition to being wholesome and supportive of contestants, it's since moved towards creating tension at the contestants' cost. So aside from the fact that most people watching it signed up to watch a nice show, it has also shifted the goalposts of what that even means. And that, lovelies and gentlefolk, is some bullshit.

I decided to break my rant analysis into four main parts: theme weeks, the hosts, the judges, and the bakers. Let's get to it!

Theme Weeks:

If you watch Bake Off, you know the show's always had a specific theme for each week. The staples that come up in most seasons are:

cake

biscuit

bread

pudding/dessert

pastry

patisserie

Less common but consistent are things like caramel and chocolate week.

Then there are the fun episodes! When GBBO was on the BBC, this started out with things tea week, tarts, pies, tray bakes, basically little tangents still focused on emphasizing specific baking skills. In Series 6 (still on the BBC) they had their first nation-focused theme week with French week -- fairly innocuous given that a lot of patisserie is French, France and England share much more culture than either cares to admit [Norman Flag dot gif], and it was a nice change from watching Paul make the bakers do recipes that involved boiling things while talking about how wonderful boiled doughs are (are they, Paul? Are they?).

The show kept mixing it up with innocuous themes like advanced dough and alternative ingredients weeks, European cakes, Victorian week, batter week, and botanical week. And while it was frustrating to watch Paul Hollywood mispronounce things like the Hungarian Dobos Torta and lecture bakers on babka when he clearly knew nothing about it (or about Jewish baking in general, go off Past Me), the show's general attitude was that the judges had their own opinions, which were separate from the immutable facts around the chemistry of baking (more on this later) and shouldn't affect how bakers are judged.

After the show moved to Channel 4, the number of themed weeks increased and more of them focused on specific countries. In 6 seasons on the BBC, there were only two country-focused theme weeks, and in 5 seasons on Channel 4 there have been five. And while they've also had themes like vegan baking, roaring 20s, the 1980s, spice week, etc. the show has really started to go hard on exoticizing other cultures in outright disrespectful and racist ways. There's been Italian and Danish week, German, Japanese (it wasn't, it was East Asian week), and now Mexican week (which doesn't touch on interspersed Jewish bakes that didn't get a theme week, like versions of bagels and babka set as technical challenges that were borderline hate crimes and mansplained by a guy who has no idea how to make either and once wrote in a cookbook that challah was traditionally eaten during Passover). Each time the hosts played up the theme with racist bits and jokes that can be used as evidence in court if your case is "why should shows with scripted content have a professional writing staff."

Which touches on other issues the show has now...

The Hosts:

When GBBO was on the BBC, the show was hosted by ✨Mel Giedroyc✨ and ✨Sue Perkins✨. They encouraged the bakers! They'd hold stuff for them sometimes! They were interested in them! If a baker had a breakdown, they would start singing copyrighted material to render the footage unusable! When the show moved to Channel 4, they left, though I'm not unconvinced that Channel 4 offered them impossible to accept contracts to force them out so they could rebrand the show. They replaced them with Sandy Toksvig and Noel Fielding. Sandy was a lovely host in the vein of Mel and Sue, and she and Noel had a relatively sweet rapport, but she left a few seasons ago and was replaced by Matt Lucas.

Noel Fielding is mostly known for his quirky brand of comedy, a sort of British Zooey Deschanel who's goth from the neck up, an upperclass British gay divorcee from the neck down, and basically an early 60s Beatle re: trousers. Matt Lucas has almost definitely never watched a single episode of GBBO and his most redeeming quality is his thinly veiled contempt for Paul Hollywood.

The two treat the baking tent as their personal playground. Far from the supportive attitude of Mel and Sue, they tend to get in the bakers' way during the most stressful moments, especially when they try to do hilarious "comedy" bits (I can't not put that in quotes) like Noel's talking wooden spoon thing, or Matt talking over Noel to do time calls. During theme weeks like Japanese and Mexican week, they do culture-specific bits that are both racist ("just Juan joke" and "is Mexico a real place?") and unsurprising, given that both Matt and Noel did blackface on their respective sketch shows and absolutely could and should have known better because it was already the current fucking century.

All this to say, there's now a separation between the bakers and the hosts, as if they're on different shows. The hosts are doing their own thing and the bakers are doing GBBO. The show has gotten meaner to the bakers, and the hosts aren't there to support them anymore, they're just there to be comic relief. Because when you refocus your show on stressing the bakers the fuck out, you need a forced laugh I guess ¯\_(ツ)_/¯.

The Judges:

First of all, a sincere congratulations to Paul Hollywood who managed to squeeze I jUsT cAmE bAcK fRoM mExIcO aNd YeT sTiLL pRoNoUnCe PiCo De GaLLo As 'PiKa De KaLLa' and I aM aN eXpErT oN s'MoReS wHiCh aRe MaDe WiTh DiGeStiVe BiScUiTs AcCoRdiNg tO mE, aN eXpErT oN s'MoReS, just two in a giant pile of astoundingly wrong hot takes, into a short enough time span that they all aired within Liz Truss's term as Prime Minister. A true man of accomplishments.

In the interest of fairness, I need to preface this with a disclaimer that, due to the fact that I've been watching Bake Off for most of its run, I'm biased. Specifically, I can't stand Paul Hollywood's smarmy, classist, egomaniac ass because he's proven time and again he's more interested in looking smart than actually knowing what he's talking about. Since the show moved to Channel 4, they've changed the occasional handshake Paul would give bakers to the HoLlYwOoD hAnDsHaKe™️. It's gone from being an emphasis of someone's skill to a goal, a reward, and one that emphasizes the judges' place above the bakers.

The judges used to function as teachers, imparting their skills and insights to the bakers. When the show was on the BBC, the voiceover leading to a judging would focus on the bakers' work being finished, saying how it will now be evaluated based on their skill and how well they met the brief. The voiceovers now, on Channel 4, focus on the judging (literally saying something along the lines of, "the bakers will now be judged by Prue and Paul"). There is a clear distinction Channel 4's producers have made, to mark that the show is now about whether or not the judges approve, not whether the brief was understood and executed well. On the BBC, it was irrelevant whether the judges liked a particular flavor, as long as the bake was well-made. Now, the bakers are expected to know the judges tastes and cater to them, which is frankly bullshit. A judge doesn't have to like a flavor to know whether or not it was executed well, ie. is it carrying a bake and was it meant to etc.

The judges have been turned into a brand. Cynically, Channel 4 knows that by building them up and focusing the show more on them, they can exploit their image more for profit. In the process, they've become much more biased and their own biases have come out as well. Most recently in the flaming dumpster fire that was Mexican Week, Paul Hollywood tried to intimidate a baker by telling them he had just gotten back from Mexico (which must have been a fruitful learning trip if he couldn't even learn how to pronounce pico de gallo correctly). Where do I even start with this? Here's an amateur baker from England (the show specifically casts middle and lower middle class bakers for the most part??) who likely can't afford trips to Mexico, who lives in a country with incredibly limited access to Mexican cuisine, who is expected not only to understand the cooking and baking traditions of a completely different culture but to do so well enough to play with it and do something creative with it. On top of which, one of the judges is now using his privilege of traveling halfway around the world as some kind of leverage, as if this were a bar that any amateur British baker could clear.

Prue, meanwhile, has openly asserted her biases against cultural flavors and textures, prioritizing her own personal preferences over them, as if they were in any way relevant to the skills and knowledge necessary to execute the tasks she sets to the bakers. She has also been consistently elitist, criticizing bakers for choices they made that were clearly informed by their experiences within income brackets that are too low and foreign for Prue to comprehend. She once had a go at a baker on a Christmas special because his Christmas dinner themed bake didn't have a turkey, even though it was clear from the stories he shared of his own Christmases that his family likely couldn't afford one. "It's not really Christmas dinner without a turkey," Prue said into the camera angrily while sitting on a chair made of live orphans and telling the ghost of Christmas Future to come back when he had another museum gift shop necklace for her to round out her collection.

The show is no longer about which baker has the best skills. It's become about which mortal can appease the gods of Mount Olympus, ie. the judges.

The Bakers:

Remember when the show was about them? Channel 4 doesn't! Because this is a reality competition show, the bakers are chosen both based on their skills, as well as cast-ability. They're cast as characters, distinct from each other, from different areas, age groups, ethnicities. All of them are amateurs. All of them are middle or lower middle class. They've ranged from college students to supermarket cashiers to prison wardens to scientists.

Something I noticed when the show moved to Channel 4 is that the baker who goes home in the first week is always wildly behind the rest in skills. I have no proof of this other than my eyeballs and deductive reasoning skills, but I think that Channel 4 deliberately casts a ringer each season who they think will be an easy send-off in the first week, just to get the audience's feet wet.

Anyway, like I said, this show used to be about the bakers - about them building skills and learning, and having walked into the tent with a self-taught foundation and understanding of the processes and chemical reactions involved in baking. When the show was on the BBC, the end of each round had some (often brief) moments of tension - will they finish in time? Will they get their bakes on the plate before time is up? Did they forget to add sugar to their batter and only remember at the last minute? In the end, they usually managed to finish and we'd all breathe a sigh of relief and think, yeah! You go, Bakers Who I'm Rooting For!

Now, on Channel 4, the end of round drama has been stretched to be so much longer that they've composed extra music for it. The bakers often seem out of their depth, whether because the instructions for the technical challenge are too vague (bake a lemon meringue pie??? As if anyone in the UK under the age of 60 has had one in the last decade???), or because they were expected to bake something that required a more than a basic foundation they weren't told of. Often it seems like they just aren't given enough time, a tactic used by reality competition shows to manipulate contestants into giving the cameras more dramatic content. On top of all this, the hosts get in their way, instead of helping them plate their bakes. As has been pointed out before, when everyone fails the challenge, the real failure lies with whoever set it.

In conclusion:

The show no longer exists to teach the bakers - and the audience - skills or knowledge. It now manipulates contestants for dramatic effect and prioritizes showing conflict over wholesome content. Channel 4 sees the bakers as social media content they can churn out season after season, and don't care about them because in a few months there'll be a new batch to exploit. Meanwhile, the judges are also out of their depth, co-opting recipes from other cultures and butchering them horrendously, while the camera gives them nothing but status as they hold bakers to the expectation that they learn how to make things very much the wrong way. If you saw any of the tweets about Mexican or Japanese week, or read my post on how Paul Hollywood isn't allowed to go near babka ever again, you'll understand.

So what would fix all this? Scrap the current judges and the hosts altogether. Bring back Mel and Sue, and replace the judges with expert bakers who have a love of their craft and want to share it with others. The draw of GBBO used to be its warmth and comfort - if Channel 4 isn't going to start its own version of Master Chef For Bakers, then it needs to stop trying to find a balance of how it can insert that vibe into GBBO. It can't. That's not a thing. Stop trying.

[nicolesainz]

Darling (JB 22)

Jenson Button x f!reader (Mark Webbers Daughter)

A/N: Ya’ll can blame the Brawn Doc (which btw was great, go check it out)

Summary: A little visit to your dad’s old friend after the Goodwill festival wouldn’t hurt,right?

Warnings: minors dni, +18, suggestive smut, edging, fingering, p! in v!, age gap (reader is 22)

“Hey Jense, would you mind keeping an eye on her? Missus and I will fly back to Australia but she’s staying here for a friend’s party”

My father would’ve never let me stay in a hotel. It had to be Jenson. Out of all his friends, all the people in the fucking UK, it had to be him.

And reminded that I’m 22. Not underage. And I can legally drink, thank you very much.

“Of course mate. I have a spare room she can use. I’ll barely be home this weekend.” It was the British Grand Prix and he is a presenter for Sky Sports, hence why he won’t be around.

To be fair, I only watch the post race show just to admire him. But my dad doesn’t need to know that, or Jenson himself. He doesn’t have to know how handsome he is or how smart he sounds given his knowledge in Formula One.

What’s more attractive than that?

And the fact that I have secret screenshots of his shots in my phone, but again, no one needs to know.

“Let me get her luggage full of god knows what type of dresses. I don’t even know when she bought them!”

"I hope you know how old I am, dad" I roll my eyes at his comment as Jenson lets out a small giggle, earning a death glare from my dad.

"Before she leaves the house, please make sure to see what she's wearing. And if there are any boys in sight." my dad warns him, as if I am going to enroll myself in the army and fight the enemy, which to him, would've been more preferable compared to a party.

"Got it. We definitely know that you think she's 17" Jenson replies and my mother laughs along, as I try not to burst out.

"If you side with Y/N, I will break your Porche." My dad's voice raise and I glance at Jenson who has a look plastered on his face as if he was offended and scared by the threat.

"I have kids myself, I think she's going to be safe with me. Come on Mark! I was the only driver you never crashed with, kinda." He takes the luggage away from my mother's hands and waves them goodbye as I go and hug them.

"Take care kiddo and if you need anything, im a call away. Also if you want to go to the paddock, the passes are under my name" he kisses my head after having me squeezed in a tight hug.

"Y-yes dad, I know. Now please let me go because I cant breathe."

"Sorry" he sets me free and I join Jenson's side. God he's tall and broad.

"Alright now, shall we?" he looks down at me and I nod, unable to utter a single word, even though I've know him my whole life.

The boys in my university were dying to hear stories with the senior formula one drivers, coming from a daughter of one. It's a nice feeling to narrate all the success and glory of this sport.

"Seriously though, your bag is very light. Are you even carrying anything in here?" Jenson asks, weighing up and down my luggage, flexing his muscles as I try not to drool all over the place.

"Only necessities. Dresses, shoes, makeup, few outfits for the race and condoms." the last one quite shocked him but also was a way of teasing him, given my major crush.

"You have condoms, yet I didn't hear you say panties"

"Won't be needing any"

"And why is that, may I ask?"

"Cause I like to be free. More access and more fun" I wink at him and I stare at his lips, a smirk is growing as each word is leaving mine.

"So you are telling me, that right now, underneath this short but nonetheless breathtaking dress, no panties are worn?"

I get closer to him and whisper softly in his ear:

"Wanna see for yourself?"

Honestly, don't ask me where I found this much confidence and especially with someone twice my age. And a friend of my dad's.

"Behave yourself darling" he coughs lightly to clear his throat and grabs me by the waist, so my dress doesn't float from the summer breeze.

"And what if I don't want you, Mr. Button?"

"Then you'll wish you had never said that" he growls and immediately opens me the door to his McLaren.

When he gets in the drivers seat, he wastes no time and gets on the road instantly. During the ride, there's a comfortable silence filling the atmosphere, until the air coming out of Jenson's window pulls up my dress and his hand quickly falls on my thigh, holding it down once more.

Jenson decides to roll up his window but his hand remains on my thigh and this time, is holding it firmly and starts caressing it from the inside.

Soft sighs leave my mouth, but controlling them is inevitable when his touch was all I have been craving since I turned 18. His foot hits the gas harder, speeding and driving in between the other slower cars. He reminds me of the Jenson back in his Brawn days and I can feel myself pooling just at the thought.

It was the very right time when his hand cupped my bare pussy, feeling the wetness caused by barely a thought of him. The slight touch of his fingers on my trembling self has my knees going paralyzed. I feel like crying from pleasure and yet I don't even know if he's doing that on purpose to embarrass me or if he's actually enjoying it too.

"Oh baby, you're definitely not behaving yourself" he says as his index finger draws circles around my clit. My legs are clenching his hand inside me as the other one holds the steering wheel, looking at his knuckles that have turned white.

"Jenson" I breathe out and moan simultaneously as he starts pumping two fingers inside me fiercely, letting myself to his mercy and unable to react.

"This behavior will have consequences young lady. I warned you" he lets a soft kiss on the crock of my neck and feeling his beard scratching it, I go absolutely insane.

"Then punish me sir" I blurt out without thinking and Jenson drives in seconds at the spot in front of his house, stops the car and places me on top of his lap with just one hand.

Jenson's lips crash into mine without wasting a second as his fingers play with my uncontrollably wet pussy. The feeling of moaning is surely necessary and I don't hold back. My tongue dances with his and the kiss gets deeper like his fingers, hitting perfectly my soft spot.

"You are going to be the death of me" Jenson says as his mouth falls on my neck, sucking it off like there's no tomorrow. My hands try to unbuckle his belt and eventually make it to the part where I can feel his erection growing. It's true what they say, older men do it better.

In other instances I would have been furious, but Jenson ripping my dress, just so he can have better access at my breasts is incredibly hot. I don't care that I am left vulnerable at his sight. At this I was pleading it.

My breast hurt from his kisses and I know in a few hours small red dickies will be covering the surface. My fingers decide to trace the shape of his thick cock but I can tell he wants to feel me. I have teased him and he me, for way too long.

"If you keep being naughty I won't let you cum, dear" a groan escapes his body as I take his length in my hands and caress the veins that have popped out.

"Then I want you to fill me up with your cum" I take him by surprise and I can sense his heartbeat raising from worry. He regards me as something innocent, precious and fragile. Which I am. But I feel ready and I am.

"Are you sure? I mean, have you? Uh? Had sex before?"

"I-uh-well, no. But-"

"Baby we can't do it here. You don't deserve to have your first time on a car. You deserve to be worshipped."

Jenson's words make me blush and my heart was flattering as if I was a fifteen years old again, simply watching him race and get multiple podiums.

He looks around and opens the door of his house and then quickly rushes with me inside and shuts it with such force, my legs started trembling.

Suddenly, he picks me up and carries me all the way to his bedroom. A dark room filled with some of his most iconic trophies and with his smell that has been covering my entire body since the moment I entered his car.

He turns on the soft baby lights on the bedrest and takes a look at my flushed self, covered with hickies he's gifted me. His eyes scan me from head to toe as if he's about to feast.

"I want you to tell me to stop whenever you feel uncomfortable in any way." He kisses me softly and I nod my head, knowing that he would never hurt anyone.

Jenson stands up and with his strong arms parts my legs so he can have a clear vision of my already swollen womanhood. My breast are half showing from inside my bra and my lips are bitten to the core. I am a mess but he seems to like it.

He removes his shirt in quick motions revealing his god like crafted body with the hints of dark ink covering his lower v and shoulder. I had never seen them before and I am was very pleased with what was in front of my eyes.

It doesn't take him too long to strip off his trousers and be left with simply his boxers that were trying to hold in his hardened cock and my patience as well. They were giving me a preview of what was about to happen.

As Jenson lowered his body his hands were hoisting down his boxers, revealing himself and it wasn't just my mouth that was drooling but also my pussy.

His hands now were on the insides of my thighs, holding them fiercely, whilst mine were hanging around his neck. I felt like my heart was about t burst out of my chest.

"Are you ready baby?"

I was at loss for words so I gave him a final kiss for reassurance that he could continue.

In slow motions, he lowered even more and started inserting himself inside me, pumping slowly as I was trying to get used to his size. My cries were out of control as Jenson was deepening himself and my pussy was stretched to its limits.

"Jesus, you're clenching me so well darling" he breathed out and I tried to open my legs wider for his pleasure. Jenson was panting on the hem of my neck and upping the pace of his thrusts.

"Dear lord this feels so good" It feels better than good. As if I am in the seventh heaven. I don't think any man will ever make me experience this. And I don't think I want to either.

"Say that again" he demands with a harder thrust, hitting my G-spot, earning the biggest moan of the night, echoing at the entire house.

"You make me feel so damn good Jenson" I gulp hard as I try to catch my breath and scratch his back from the pain that this gives me.

"And I shall be the only one darling" he hoists me up and removes my bra with a single movement, freeing my breasts and enjoying the sight, as they are bouncing up and down along with the trusts.

"Only you Jenson" I scream his name as loud as I can and his chest fills with pride as I am reaching my height.

"Cum sweetheart. Let go" I can't hold it in much longer and I cum all over his cock. He doesn't remove himself from inside me and I don't want to. This felt so right even though for some it's very wrong.

"That was, perfect" I say in a whispering manner as I am unable to speak louder. I am so wasted but full of thrill.

"You deserve it. You deserve to be treated like that dear"

[sturn777]

ᴛᴏᴜʀ

chris sturniolo x angelina hamilton

chapter one

ALL OTHER PARTS

sturniolo.triplets

Liked by SkylarHamilton, MattSturniolo and 583,726 others...

sturniolotriplets TOUR DATES! TICKETS GO ON SALE AUGUST 9TH 2:30 PST 5:30 EST! Excited to see you guys 🦌🦈🦇

nicksturniolo Bats on top 🦇🦇🦇

chrissturniolo 🦌

user crying from europe

-> skylarhamilton ME TOO GIRL!! 😭😭

user BUYING TICKETS RIGHT NOW?!!?!!!!!

user raaah they all look so good 😍😍😍

skylarhamilton praying to god you just randomly switch up and come to the uk 🙏🙏🙏

-> sturniolotriplets Another time maybe 🤷‍♂️

-> skylarhamilton SCREAMING WHAT

-> skylarhamilton NICK PLS BE YOU I LOVE YOU 💕💖💗💞

-> nicksturniolo Love you more!!

-> skylarhamilton I DIED.

user Y'ALL IM SO EXCITED

user THRE CMIS TO MY CIY WTF OMG IM ROLNG ONIUA  TE FLOOR I CAT BREATHE HELp

-> mattsturniolo Lmao me too

user WHY ARE THE TRIPLETS SO CASUAL LMAOO ITS SCARY

user id beg my mom to go but she just wouldn’t let me 🥲🥲👎

user THE TICKETS ARE BOUGHT

mattsturniolo See y'all there 👋👋

Skylar Hamiltons birthday had been hectic already and it was only lunch time. First of all Skylar had woken up way before Angelina which was unplanned as Angelina had saved the decorations for the morning, the girls cake hadn't been finished by the bakery, some of her presents still hadn't come in the mail and most of the teenagers friends hadn't knocked at the door to join her party.

Angelina had tried her very best to make do with what they had. Turning blowing balloons up into a 'party game', picking up a cake that didn't fit the theme from the stores instead, and was currently trying her best to make a fun party even though only three out of the twelve girls invited had shown up.

What annoyed the siblings was that they had notice. It wasn't like it was a rushed invitation that had been handed out at the start of the week. No, in-fact they had invited people at least two months before to know what to prepare for, the girls who hadn't shown up had been in the group-chat that was made and were seemingly excited about it all.

But what pissed off Angelina more than it did Skylar, was that the girls who didn't show up were hanging out together and posting it on their public stories on every possible social media account possible. Lord knows she was damn near pulling up and screaming in their faces, but she kept herself calm.

So Angelina sat on the sofa and watched Skylar and her three friends; Jess, Sophia and Charlie. They were currently playing a stupid game one of them had bought over. It was some type of card game that had them rolling on the floor in laughter, so Angelina couldn't complain.

All she was waiting for now was the doorbell to ring. Her phone sat on her thigh, refreshing her texts every few seconds (sometimes minutes as she would zone out or get distracted by the teenagers in-front of her).

Once the doorbell rang she would be able to collect Skylars main present, the one she had bought not too long ago after doing quite a lot of research after the teenagers ramble in the kitchen one morning a few weeks ago.

"That's not even funny! I'm just— I'm—!" A cackle tuned itself in too Angelinas ears. Jess was struggling to catch a breath whilst speaking, Skylar and Sophia were both laid back on the carpeted floor with their hands on their stomach. The sound of laughter not even escaping their mouths as they were laughing that hard. Angelina smiled to herself, snapping a few pictures of the three that she would make sure to send to them all like she had been doing all night.

The TV played quietly behind them, a youtube video playing of the brothers their car, discussing something random topic each time Angelina would pass by. Skylar seemed to enjoy their channel a lot, along with the friends sat in the living room, and Angelina didn't really watch any youtube at all so she was open to anything. She would consider herself a 'fan' but not like the type she's seen occasionally on her for you page.

The dark skinned girl snapped out of her thoughts as the doorbell rung, the teenagers in-front of her not even noticing in the midst of their fit of laughter. Angelina stood up and walked towards the door where her friend, Maya, stood behind the wood.

Maya smiled towards Angelina, "Hey! How are you?"

"I'm good you? You have the thing?"

"Yeah I'm good, and of course." Maya smiled towards the dark skinned girl. Lifting the small, sealed envelope that was sat in her hand. "I would stay but I gotta run, tell Skye I said happy birthday!"

Angelina nodded with a smile, shouting a 'thanks' as the girl walked back towards her car, shutting the door and moving back into the living room. The group of teenagers were now sat on the sofas, the TV's volume turned up slightly as they were all focused on the current video playing.

Charlie looked up as Angelina walked in, "Hey, where'd you go?”

"Got something for the birthday girl." Angelina smiled, gently chucking the envelope onto her sisters lap which caused Skylar's eyes to drift downwards and her eyebrows to raise.

"What is it?" Skylar questioned, Angelina only shrugging in response and plopping herself down on the other sofa. Sophia and Charlie only smiled as they encouraged the girl to open the envelope quicker.

Inside the envelope was a small sheet of paper, small graphics decorating it. "Read it out then!" Sophia sighed, nudging Skylar in the ribs. Skylar only beamed a bright smile after skimming through the note.

"Dear Skylar, you are invited to the Sturniolo triplets verses tour in Orlando Florida on the eighteenth of October. Unluckily for you, your sister will be joining you but I hope you have a good time. Your flight leaves in three days, get packing."

The four girls squealed all together, jumping up and down in a small group huddle. Skylar separating herself from the other three and jumping onto Angelina, hugging her tightly.

"Thank you so much!"

"You're welcome Skye, just know you're doing the dishes for three days."

tags: @st7rnioioss @its-jennarose @timmyscomputer @kriissy4gov @liz-stxrn @sunrisemill @mattssluttywaist @riasturns @mx0qin @junnniiieee07 @sturnzsblog @mattslolita @ariieeesworld @alorsxsturn @nonameisthegameandilovejake

[pennyluna]

Misunderstandings Part 1

Pairing: Yoongi x Reader (18+) Wordcount: around 1.5k

Genre: New to working together au. Cold playboy au. Future something au.

WARNING: This story contains some bad words/strong language! Contains also spicy scenes, so please be aware before reading it.

It has been a week since my team started working with Yoongi, the week had been filled with meetings about coordination between the teams, some of the meetings were one on one basically so I could get a sense of what he expected from me during this 5 weeks, it was fairly easy to agree on the way we could handle things, starting from the fact that I would have to be available 24/7 just in case I was needed! I had been going home around 8pm every day and always kept my phone on me with the ringer.

Yoongi was going to be in the studio all day tomorrow, which meant I didn't have to go into the office so I decided to relax tonight, took a long shower, moisturized and did my relaxing ritual, put on a grey tank top, no bra and some shorts, wrapped my long wavy dark hair in a towel and walked to the kitchen.

I make sure the bottle of Sauvignon blank that I bought on my way home was cold and put out two wine glasses, one for me and one for my girl best friend Josie, she is on her way over so we can gossip and watch reality shows. Josie has been my best friend since middle school, fun fact her fiancé is also my best friend. Even bigger fun fact, I had been on a date with Zion when we were in college but we quickly agreed that a friendship was the thing for us, I introduced them during one of Josie's visits on campus and now 4 years later they are just a few months away from getting married.

I hear her emergency key to my apartment in the lock and start preparing the popcorn.

"Zion is driving me crazy!!" she says with an exasperated tone while closing the front door.

I laugh at her facial expression, she is going for annoyed but it looks cute on her.

"Hello to you too... what did he do now?"

"He keeps changing our funny dance for the wedding!"

"you mean your first dance?" I say with a confused face while pouring the wine and handing her a glass.

she takes a big sip "Nono, 'Cant help falling in love' is still our song but he saw online that people like doing some funny dance trend after and You know I'm not good at dancing."

Josie comes from a rich conservative family, she is very classy and polished, never late and never a hair out of place, so I was surprised when she told me she was in love with Zion, his style very much the opposite of her but both with a heart of gold.

I laugh at the thought of Josie dancing some TikTok challenge.

"Oh josie...you are a great dancer, just not with the new stuff!" i try to comfort her and we walk to the couch.

We are under the fluffy blankets watching our third episode of love island UK season 10, we had finished the USA one a couple of weeks ago. Suddenly my phone starts ringing, the word OFFICE written in the screen, I look at the time "11:34 pm". Josie and I look at each other with confusion in our faces, she pauses the show and I shake my head trying to shake the 2 glasses of wine off my system and then proceed to answer the call.

"Hello (Y/N), this is the security from the building, sorry for calling you so late, Mr. Min is here at the office trying to access the studio but he had left his keys inside and the other copy isㅡ"

"is in my bag!" I say simultaneously facepalming my face. "I will be there in 15 minutes" luckily I don't live far away from it.

Hanging up I rush to the room, put a pair of skinny jeans on, my classic vans and put my hair on a messy ponytail. The taxi Josie had called for me was here already so I rushed out of the door telling her I would be back soon.

7 minutes later I was in front of my building, greeted the security and proceeded to the 19th floor, were the studio is. Yoongi is waiting right in front of the elevator doors when they open and I get surprised to see him in his very relaxed outfit. Hair covering his gorgeous forehead, his phone in one hand and the other one in his pocket, his eyes rise up to meet mine and I smile at him. We start walking to the elevator, he is behind me and I don't know if its his presence or the wine but I feel my cheeks heating up and warmth running through me. I open the door for him and try to hand the keys to him.

"do you want to come in for a while?" he asks with a blank expression.

"mmm sure." dammit, I am supposed to be just dropping the keys off.

I walk past him and he closes the door behind us. Its a normal studio, with little touches of him, a couple of basketball gadgets and some posters, a couch with some pretty purple cushions and a blanket, he had made it his own.

"would you like some more wine?" his question takes my attention out of looking around his studio.

"mmm sure. thank you. Waitㅡ 'more'?" my face expressing my confusion.

He has a small smile on his face while pouring me a glass "yeah, more! I noticed you have a slight scent of wine on you, so you must have been drinking some before coming here".

aww, he was smelling meㅡ Stop. waitㅡ oh my god did that mean I smell of alcohol?. oh God, that's not very professional.

"hey, its not a problem you know. I like wine, so you know... you smell good" his words snapping me out of my small mental freak out. "plus, you weren't even supposed to be coming here so don't worry about it." he hands me the glass of wine.

We've been seated on his couch and talking casually about the things we like and our passions for a couple of hours now, I feel really comfortable around him and he seems comfortable around me! He said something funny and I pushed his leg in a jokingly manner but when I tried to retrieve my hand he grabbed it pulling me closer to him, we stopped laughing suddenly and stared into each others eyes, he bit his bottom lip and shacked his head no subtly, like if he was shaking away a thought. His eyes started roaming my frame and My heartbeat accelerated once I noticed where his gaze had stopped.

My nipples were hard and he could see their outline through my tank top. Shit!!! I didn't put on bra. I should say goodnight and walk away but why aren't my legs moving?! I feel warmth spreading through my thighs.

"It's late!" He suddenly gets up and it startles me. "Maybe you should go home!"

"huh? maybe you should go home!" I say with defiance, -why cant i just shut up-.

"(Y/N)!" -my name sounds so good in his voice- "You are drunk and I'm afraid you will regret any decision we take after this point!"

He is making sense, he has a point, plus we are working together, we need to maintain a professional relationship so I get up and start walking past him and towards the door, I say goodbye and walk to the elevator. Pressing the button to call the elevator I realize that my keycard to leave the building is in my bag with my phone and my house keys -damm it- I walk back to the studio where Yoongi hadn't closed the door yet for some reason and when his eyes reached mine, I swear there was a little hope in them. I walked past him again and grabbed my bag then turned around to wave goodbye.

He stayed still for a while, like contemplating what to do, he raised his hand to wave back but he seemed hesitant. I started to walk to the door when suddenly he grabbed my wrist. I stopped breathing for a second and my heart started beating faster.

"Maybe you should stay!" he says softly. while pulling me towards him until my chest is flat against his. I can feel his breath on my face. A hint of whiskey on it.

"Maybe you should stay too!"

He smiles at my statement and that seemed to be all the permission he needed because his hand started to travel from my waist to my breast while the other one held my chin up while he watched me and the kisses me.

It was gentle at first and then became passionate, one of those kisses that take your breath away and make you dizzy. He kissed like I belonged to him, like no one had kissed me before and I was loving it.

His hand move to the front of my jeans and start undoing the buttons, his mouth now trailing my neck. my jeans come off and we move around, he leans my ass against his desk and starts trailing wet kisses from my neck down. He sucks my nipples through the tank top and starts rubbing my core.

"so wet for me already huh?" I moan and put my hands on the desk to balance myself a bit. His mouth trails down my body until I can feel his warm breath on top of my core, his fingers slowly move my panties to the side and the he assaults my clit with his mouth. -so much talent in that mouth-.

Yoongi's tongue is all over my clit and I feel my orgasm building. I cant control my moans and thank god this place is soundproof. He starts alternating between tongue fucking me and playing with my clit and I am almost at my high. The minute his hand grabs my hips to keep me still I cant control myself any longer and come. "Good girl! You taste amazing". he smirks.

"My turn!!" I smile at him and fall to my knees, looking up at him and holding the eye contact I start lowering his sweatpants. I was surprised to notice he wasn't wearing any underwear and his erection almost smacked my face when it came out of his pants!

I start holding his dick and licking the tip of it, he exhales a shaky breath and I slowly introduce his erection in my mouth. Starting to suck in and out of my mouth at first slowly and then increasing my pace, I cup his balls in my hand and then continue to suck him off at a fast pace! he is moaning and throwing his head back and I can feel it wont take him long before reaching his orgasm! I slow down my pace to tease him a little and we make eye contact again, he seems hungry for me, he wants me.

"Get up!" after taking the rest of his clothes off, he helps me get up and he takes my tank top and underwear then stares at my body for a second, I can see hunger in those eyes, hunger for me. I can see he cant decide on what to play with first. "Bend over my desk!" he commands -I guess he decided where to start- my boobs are now pressed flat against his desk, it is cold and I feel my nipples hardening.

His hands start caressing my ass and touching my clit "You are a sight. I've been wanting to bend you over my desk ever since the first day when you gave us that building tour" he says and I instantly moaned out of neediness, I need him inside of me now!.

"YOONGIㅡ"

"My god I love how you say my name... keep saying it princess!" -fuuck I want to come again so bad- he continues touching me and then I fill his hand get to the back of my neck pinning me to the desk and his other hand rubbing his dick around my folds.

"Yoongi, I needㅡ" he shut me up with his dick entering me hard, I moaned loudly and he waited a second to let me adjust then started pumping into me hard and at a fast pace. I became a moaning mess and my orgasm started building again, he used his free had to spank my ass and I moaned again, my eyes got teary but I was enjoying this. I was enjoying being fucked senseless. I enjoyed the pain mixed with pleasure that he was giving me. I needed it. After all, it had been almost two years since the last time I had sex.

I notice his pace getting faster and faster "Come for me princess! I want you to come!" he says with a commanding voice. Our orgasms hit us couple of seconds later, his seed all over my lower back!

We are both panting. He takes a second to clean me up, then opens a drawer grabbing a t-shirt from it and giving it to me. We sit on the couch to rest for a bit he kisses my forehead and suddenly the exhaustion and the wine get to me and I fall asleep in his arms!

I wake up the day after with a strong headache, I feel around for my phone that should be on my bedside table but then open my eyes to realize I'm still on the couch in the studio. Yoongi isn't in the couch anymore so I look around and see him working at his desk on the computer. I breathe a sight of relief. I reach for my jeans put them on and then walk towards him.

"Your bag and keys are by the piano" eyes fixed to the screen and monotone voice.

"Thanks!" I say hesitant about what to do next. "Would youㅡ" he cuts me off.

"I will see you at the meeting this afternoon." This time his voice sounds annoyed and dismissive. A bad feeling downs on me.

I grab my things and once I'm at the door I look back, expecting him to at least look at me before I go but nothing. -He regrets it-  that thought hurt, more than my headache!

While waiting for my taxi I realized that its 6am, that I had left Josie at home waiting for me and that I had royally fucked up by sleeping with the VIP, that he seemed to regret it to the point of not being able to look at me and that the meeting where I will have to see him in a few hours will be hard.

A.N: This is part 1 of this story, Hope you can enjoy it. Please if you want, read the prologue of this story too. I am not clear on how many parts it will have but hopefully many more, I have already mapped out how the story will continue but publishing it depends on the readers request.

A.N 2: any feedback would be appreciated! Likes and conditions are appreciated too! Please do not copy my work and give credit if reshared!

[petermorwood]

YA or not YA, that is the question...

This started out as a response to Diane’s post here about YA literature and its long history prior to what some people think inspired it, but got longer (Oh! What a surprise!) and wandered far enough from the initial subject that I decided to post separately.

So here it is.

*****

Many years ago my town library (in Northern Ireland, so following UK library practice, I suppose) had just two sections, Adult and Children. There was no YA section, and the Children’s section covered everything from large-format picture books through to hardback novels and the usual amount of non-fiction.

(Library books were almost always bought in hardback for better wear, and even the softback picture books were rebound with heavy card inserts.)

There were classics like “Treasure Island”,  “Kidnapped”, “King Solomon’s Mines” “Under the Red Robe” and “The Jungle Books”.

There were standalone titles like “The Otterbury Incident”, “The Silver Sword”, “The Sword in the Stone” and “The Stone Cage”.

There were series about characters like William, Biggles, Jennings and his counterpart Molesworth, the Moomins, Narnia and Uncle.

There were authors like Alan Garner, Nicholas Stuart Grey, Rosemary Sutcliffe, Henry Treece, Ronald Welch… And of course there was J.R.R. Tolkien.

The first time I got "The Hobbit", "Farmer Giles of Ham" and "Smith of Wootton Major" they were shelved in the Children's section. This was about 1968-69.

In the early 1970s the library moved to larger premises, which allowed room for Very Young Children (where the picture books now lived) and Children (everything else), still with no YA section, though with more advanced picture books like “Tintin” and “Asterix” * in a sort of no-man’s-land between them.

( * These included editions in the original French, which turned out very useful for making language lessons at school a bit more fun and gaining extra marks in exams through judiciously enhanced vocabulary.)

“The Hobbit” et cetera were still on the Children shelves, but now that the library was larger and more open-plan, volumes of "The Lord of The Rings", normally in the Adult section, occasionally got shelved there as well by well-meaning non-staff people.

I never saw “The Hobbit” mis-shelved alongside “Lord of the Rings” among the Adults, but Farmer Giles” and “Smith” sometimes turned up there, courtesy of those same well-meaning hands.

It’s probably because the first, with its sometimes complex wordplay and mock-heroic plot, reads like a humorous parody of more serious works, while the second, if read in the right frame of mind, can seem quite adult in the style of Sylvia Townsend Warner’s “Kingdoms of Elfin” - which is in fact a good deal more adult than “Smith of Wootton Major”, even if you squint.

*****

This “Hobbit” / “Rings” confusion is a lightweight version of assuming a particular author writes every book for the same age-group. This is very much not the case.

Sometimes the thickness of the book is a giveaway. Compare, for instance, @neil-gaiman’s “American Gods” with “Coraline” or indeed “Fortunately, The Milk”.

Sometimes the cover is a hint, for example the difference between “Live and Let Die” by Ian Fleming...

...and “Chitty Chitty Bang Bang”, also by Ian Fleming...

...although the original James Bond novels are – apart from some extremely dated attitudes – a lot more weaksauce than many YA books nowadays.

(More weaksauce still now that Fleming, like Roald Dahl and Agatha Christie, has been censored to conceal the extent to which - let's call them Certain Attitudes - were a standard feature in British popular fiction. Apparently (I haven't read any Newspeak Bond so can't confirm) the redaction was done in a curiously slapdash way, removing some things while leaving others.

These novels have become, IMO anyway, period pieces as much as Kipling, Doyle, Dickens and Austen, and erasure probably has less to do with sensitivity - maybe with some "brush it under the rug and they'll forget about it" involved - than with keeping them marketable, so Fleming doesn't go the way of other once-bestselling writers like "Sapper" and Sydney Horler.)

It would also be a mistake, despite advisory wizards Tom and Carl, to think that @dduane’s “Young Wizards” books are meant for the same age-group as her “Middle Kingdoms” series – although, once again, the later YW books and all of the MK slot into what a modern YA audience expects from its fiction.

But sometimes there’s absolutely no doubt that This Book by This Author is not meant for the readership of That Book by The Same Author. I’m thinking of one example which caused a certain amount of amusement.

“Bee Hunter” by Robert Nye is a retelling of the Beowulf story for children, though IIRC occasional bloody episodes as Grendel takes Hrothgar’s housecarls apart make it more suited to older children. 

I’d brought home a copy from the library when much younger, and borrowed it again years later in company with another Nye novel, “Falstaff”...

...which was poetic, historic, melancholic, often bawdy, frequently funny and at all times most emphatically NOT for children, as indicated by some of these chapter headings - I draw your attention to XX, XXII, XXXII and especially XL... ;->

Yes. Quite... :->

*****

I was familiar with card index systems from quite early in my life, because my grandfather’s grocer’s shop had a fairly simple one for keeping track of customers, suppliers, stock and so forth, and since the library’s index card system cross-referenced in the same way, I was already home and dry.

If I could remember a title, I'd find the author, and once found I could track down other titles by that author (which, as shown above, can be educational...) Even if I could only remember the subject - historical, adventure, comedy - I'd still have narrowed my search window more than somewhat.

(This from-here-to-there mindset later became virtual train travel by way of the electronic timetables which SBB – Swiss Railways – used to issue on CD, and which let me “travel” anywhere in Europe, complete with a map. Those CDs are long discontinued, but I can still do virtual travel courtesy of the SBB website. Complete with a map…)

This is the last one we got, kept for sentimental reasons and occasional outdated train-travel on an equally outdated XP netbook.

As you do.

Or as I do, anyway. :->

*****

I also knew about title request cards and interlibrary loans, and was a frequent user - never more so than when I started reading “The Lord of the Rings” for the first time.

The town library didn’t have all three volumes, just “The Fellowship of the Ring” and “The Two Towers”, so I checked them out on a Friday to read over the weekend.

You can already see where this is going… :->

I finished “Fellowship” late on Saturday afternoon, went straight into “Towers” and by Sunday evening was all of a twitter (no, not that one) or as my mum would have said, up to high Doh, as I fretted about Not Knowing What Happened Next.

Fortunately school was no more than a brisk bike ride from the library, so I devoted my Monday morning break to zooming down and filling in one of the most urgent title requests I’ve ever made, then spent the rest of the week on tenterhooks, looking in every lunchtime and each afternoon on my way home.

Just In Case.

Some kindly librarian must have pulled strings or stamped the request "Expedite Soonest", because when I went back to school after Thursday lunch, I had “The Return of the King” burning a hole in my saddlebag.

I wanted to start reading it at once, but good sense prevailed; imagine getting caught between chapters at the back of a boring Geography lesson and Having The Book Confiscated…

I didn’t pay much attention in class on Friday, due to being half-asleep after starting “Return” in the evening after prep and finishing it in the wee hours of the morning.

But being tired didn’t prevent me from starting with “Fellowship” again on Friday night, and this time being able to read right through to the end without needing to stop.

It Was Great…

[nashdoesstuff]

hellooo i did a thing for @thelunarsystemwrites’s superhero au [1/2] <33

this is my oc vou in the au!

they’re a superhero! their hero’s name is dreamshade, and they primarily fight crime dealing with acts of violence, bribery, and social injustice.

by day, they’re an overworked fashion designer for one of the largest brands in the city named vou asara. Their schedule includes various overtime days, but they usually escape for their superhero gig. nobody knows how they haven’t gotten fired yet.

LORE, STATS, AND MORE:

LORE:

Vou Asara was brought to life by a family of two, combining their SOUL magic to make them. They grew up as a normal kid, but had to go into foster care at 14 when one parent died unexpectedly and the other got into substances. Their adoptive parents were kind to Vou, and did whatever they could to help them reach their dreams, which was making it into the fashion industry. Upon getting a job opportunity abroad, they moved out of their town in the UK and into the big city, where they started out as a designer’s assistant for a large clothing label, making part-time pay.

When coming home one night after a shift, they stopped by a convenience store for a quick coffee and the evening newspaper. They saw an advertisement from a local pawn shop searching for employees while skimming through, and they decided to take it, as they needed extra money on the side to pay rent.

The first few days on that job were fine, though sometimes they came out of their shifts sluggish, with the smell of tobacco stuck in their senses. A human customer came, one day, offering up a ring that Vou hadn’t ever seen before. It was dashing— an amber stone was the center of attention on the piece of jewelry, with small other gems surrounding it. The amber shimmered beautifully in the sunlight, and Vou thought it could pair nicely with a dress they were designing in their studio. So they bought it from the person, then purchased it from the shop itself, taking it home excitedly.

They combined the ring with the dress and some other accessories immediately after getting it. They decided to wear this outfit to a fashion event with their boss at the time, and things went swell until they decided to start drinking. The alcohol made them go a bit bonkers, and they eventually collapsed at the after party, needing to be brought home by a barista named Atra. The issue was, when they had passed out, they shattered the large stone in the ring, releasing a magic that latched onto their bones. The magic caused their darkened bones to become more droopy, and a bit more of a pain to manage. However, they quickly found out they now had the ability to shapeshift and was quite flexible.

They used this to their advantage at first, picking at locks and safes to steal, but when they got promoted in their fashion job and left the stinking pawn shop, they decided to leave the criminal activity behind and use it for the better. They spent a good while making an alter ego, and in the end, they ended up with the hero, Dreamshade— a fighter whose job is to fight injustice in the city.

As of now, they have no nemesis, and are quite friendly with people unless they work with them. The barista that helped them is now their partner, and they know one another incredibly well and love each other very much.

Stats:

16 ATK 25 DEF 500 HP

Strengths and Weaknesses:

Dreamshade is strongest when they’re calm. Calmer atmospheres cause their goop to level and not droop excessively. Their biggest weakness is water and warm temperatures, as it interacts negatively with their goopy bones. They are strengthened in cooler temperatures.

Fun facts:

Vou still has their English accent and is quite proud of it.

They especially love petty crime and shutting that down.

They’re barely ever at home, unfortunately. Their partner is the only person who knows about Dreamshade being Vou, and they found out accidentally.

They typically only fight with appendages that they may produce on their back. They can have up to 6 at a time, but prefer to use only 2.

They’re in charge of the dress department in their building.

Their superhero outfit takes around 2 minutes to get into.

They do kind of want to join a superhero group, but aren’t sure how it would work…

Their alignment is neutral good.

and that’s pretty much it! i’m still working on tk, so keep an eye out for that!

[papiermachecat]

Helloooooo anyone who still follows me! I figured I’d better do a writeup of my pilgrimage to Slane with some notorious fellow tumblr hags because most of THEM are headed to Wembley for multiple shows which is fine and I’m not jealous at all because it’s FINE.

Amongst other things, in this writeup I will address A) my first time flying internationally (0/10 would do again but did not enjoy) B) the very flexible meaning of “5 minute walk” coming from an Irish or British person, C) the Irish weather (glorious), and D) the personal shortcomings of everyone I met on the trip (this section WILL be lengthy)*

Anyway my last day of school with students was Thursday June 8, and yesterday I had to be at work to do summer cleanup & checkout. In between I flew to Dublin???? Met my friends?? Almost died(more on that later)! And came back home! It’s insanity. So I waved goodbye to the buses on Thursday, raced home, dyed my hair (? I was not thinking clearly), packed, and was at the airport by 5:45 PM. “Wow!” you might be thinking, “She’s clearly very efficient and organized!” Unless you’ve ever spent two (2) minutes with me, then you know better. So yeah, flight was uneventful, Aer Lingus is kinda crappy but if you were seated in the first 10 rows you had a chance of getting an ice cube in your water so there’s that.

Upon arrival at Dublin, I met up with the fabulous @aggresivelyfriendly fresh from Italy and we had the loveliest taxi driver chat with us through sunny Dublin and drop us at the door of our very hip boutique hotel and I thought wow, these taxi drivers are so nice! Can’t wait to meet more of them! HAHAHAHA anyway

At the hotel we met up with fellow Americans @chasm2018 and @accidentalharrie , soon joined by the best UK/Ireland team since Harry & Niall, the delightful @cantquitu and @justharried as well as the famed, Harry-endorsed Mr. Justharried, who not only endured our company but even gave a good show of enjoying it! A fine man indeed 😘. Anyway yes, we hugged, we chatted, we ate, it was GRAND. A plan was formulated! Pop down to early merch, see a few sights, have a little lunch, shop a bit maybe, then dinner…all sounded lovely. Bit of walking, they said. Not very far, they said. Just down the road! they said.

So anyway we get to early merch—just a 10-15 minute walk with lovely weather, and there was NO LINE. None. Walked in, walked up to the counter, bought stuff, done. Blew my mind tbh. Okay great! Headed over to have snacks (the authentic Irish delicacy they call “nachos” idk if you’ve heard of them) and drinks at a church in front of a bronze bust of Arthur (I think?) Guinness, tended to by a very charming waiter who seemed accustomed to crazy Americans who want ice in their water. 10/10.

Side note: I wanted to hear some authentic Irish music. You know, walk by a pub and hear some Celtic ballad being sung while emotional old men all hold up their mugs of foamy beer, right? Well. As it turns out, their musical selections in a bar are pretty much what you’d hear here and I saw NO emotional old men swaying with their pints up as they sang along :/. But we wandered and cantquitu told us tales of her misspent youth in the thrift shops and it was lovely! 10/10

Another “”5 minute walk”” and we were at dinner, which was so lovely. No ice water, naturally, but lovely nonetheless! I had a traditional Irish salmon and tortellini with edamame. FUN FACT: 75% of the world’s supply of edamame is grown in Dingle, Ireland, famously home to Fungi (pronounced FUN-ghee) the dolphin, may he rest in peace. (Parts of that fact are actually true btw, but not the edamame part.)

A quick jaunt (45 miles or so) back to the hotel for more drinks and then off to bed to rest up for HARRYYYYYYYY!! I began to have serious regrets about my footwear choices, and rightly suspected that Saturday could be worse, but HARRY!!!!

STATS: step count: 18K // Ubers taken: 0 // successful acquisitions of a beverage with ice in it: 2 // painful blisters formed: 3

So on Saturday I switched up my shoes and hopes for the best. A quick 5 minute/6 mile walk* to the coach pickup spot and shortly we were on a stifling bus to Slane!! Expect a 20-30 minute walk to the venue, Ticketmaster told me HAHAHA anyway we get dropped off in a cow pasture (FUN FACT: Irish pastures are the lumpiest in the world*), somehow adopt two Irish teenagers who didn’t know until day of that they were supposed to have a chaperone over 25, poor things (I better never catch Lenna & Lily—cantquitu’s beloved nieces—complaining about hags in the fandom!), and off we go! Anyway after the short cow pasture walk and a bridge crossing there was a security check and I thought gosh this wasn’t bad at all! Surely security wouldn’t be set up 46 miles from the venue right? So I strolled through this wooded area, pleasant weather, good company, nice breeze…for perhaps 2-3 hours? Idk might’ve been a bit shorter but I definitely at one point said “Do you think this is some kind of prank? Like just to see how far we’ll walk?” Genuinely, it was FOREVER. My footwear choices had not been sound, my blisters from the day before were so ouchy oh and FUN FACT: the average preferred walking speed of my companions is a 5-minute mile. Which is like a 3-second kilometer, I did the math.*

ANYWAY. The first sign of civilization we saw was a stone wall with a hand-painted sign that I will post here

Please note this is not my photo and must be older as there are now 23 KILLED. SO FAR. Cantquitu told me that is one of her favorite Irish traditions* idk seemed a bit dark to me but 🤷🏻‍♀️

So we’re clearly there, right?? Hahahaha no. Another few billion miles later there’s another security check, then a ticket scan, THEN we’re at the top of a massive hill with merely 6 more miles* to walk to get to our Hollywood pod. I’ve drawn you a map of our route which I will post here.

Once we were settled, it was as you’d expect. So happy. So much fun. I ~almost forgot about the death march I had endured and tried to forget about the inevitably worse one awaiting us—though turns out there was an easier path home—still ages, and done in a sea of people, but easier!

Anyway you all probably saw the show or the best bits of it on video but here are my standout moments that wouldn’t have been captured on a livestream:

• the ADORABLE Scottish couple next to us with the guy being THE biggest harrie—knew every word, every drum fill, every 1-2-3-4…his girlfriend was a sweetheart too but just may have been the lesser into Harry between the two lol—we hugged goodbye and I hope they have a wonderful life ❤️

• the absolute shock of hurrying back from the bathrooms (such as they were 😬) while I Wanna Dance With Somebody was playing and seeing like…nobody….dancing. The disrespect!!!!

• the fact that About Damn Time and 24K Magic were the favorites from Annie Mac’s set that’s RIGHT! YAY AMERICA!!!!!! Idk some other songs played that I guess people liked or whatever but let’s be real

• if you have seen a pic of Harry in his favorite little brown leisurewear up at the castle you can thank…I want to say justharried? Might’ve been the mister who originally spotted him? but it was 1000% justharried who played Paul Revere and soon the entire crowd was staring at him. He moved his arm in a gesture that was NOT a wave but looked at the start like it possibly COULD have been a wave and literally the whole crowd started waving at him…it was so cute but needless to say he retreated soon after before re-emerging for Mitch’s set

• During Fine Line I looked at aggressively friendly and she was crying and then I of course immediately cried as I do and then we swayed and cried and it was just…a moment. Telling myself that things will be alright has become very difficult in my life these past few years and it felt both cathartic and bittersweet and just…all the things ❤️

• My entire posse collaborating to get my feet OUT of my shoes and IN to cantquitu’s extra flip-flops she’d brought along (a size too big for her but two sizes too small for me—before you start picturing me as Sasquatch or something I wear a very normal size US 8!) which genuinely felt SO much better and I don’t think I’d have made it back otherwise, thank you ❤️

And I’ve thought of so many funny things to say but tumblr crashed the first time I wrote this and I had to redo it again and I lost it so just know, it was worth every bit of blood (and yes there was blood), sweat (soooo much sweat) and tears (Tam’s fault!!) and I’d do it all over again no question!!

[yuurei20]

Lilia Info Compilation part 2: Lilia, Video Games, Tomato Juice and Licorice

Lilia is very fond of video games, saying he once bought a game console in a country overseas but was never able to play anything on it because there is no electricity in Briar Valley.

According to Silver he often plays online games late into the night, and also has a Magicam account. When Silver comments on how happy Lilia looks when he discusses gaming, Lilia says that it is because online games didn’t exist when he was young.

Vil seems to be very familiar with the fact that Lilia is heavily involved in online gaming. When Vil asks how neither Lilia’s grades nor his skin suffer from his late-night habits, Lilia cryptically responds, “You’ll know in due time. No need to rush it.”

This kind of cryptic hinting seems to be common for Lilia, who also refuses to tell Grim that it was Malleus who sent the greeting card he and the player received, saying “You’ll find out who sent it soon enough”.

Idia, however, is completely unaware that Lilia is his online friend Muscle Red. It is not until Book 5 that Idia learns for the first time that Diasomnia students watch TV, and Lilia mentioned that he has “been known to enjoy a spot of gaming, too”.

When Idia responds with “I wasn’t expecting that”, Lilia says, “Why, of course! We’re students in high school, after all.”

This line was edited on NA with “We’re students in high school” removed, but Lilia still says the English words “high school” in the audio.

(There seems to be some confusion on the North American server because lines about the characters being pre-university have been removed. According to the game's original set-up, however, Night Raven College is a pre-university institution similar to the UK system that is referred to as a high school, repeatedly, in-game.)

Lilia’s favorite drink is tomato juice. In the Culinary Crucible event, Silver is able to keep himself awake during the stewing process by distracting himself with thoughts about how he would like to cook tomato stew for Lilia one day.

Lilia says that, while he loves “most kinds of sweets”, he doesn’t like marshmallows as it feels like “eating air” and they are not filling or fun.

His favorite sweet is black licorice, which he seems to often try and share with Cater and Kalim, his fellow pop music club members.

[forgottenghosty]

Dang I miss Immortal/Undead Male Whump with possible wholesome romance as tv shows...

I just got done rewatching FOREVER (2014) and Moonlight (2008) and want to watch more shows and even movies of the similar tastes and it’s hard to find.

(Forever 2014)

(Moonlight 2008) (Fun facts, the character Joseph from the show voices Terra in the Kingdom Hearts games. A book was published years after the show that inspired the series called “Angel of Vengeance” by  Trevor O’ Munson. The show went on hiatus due to the writers strikes and received 4 new episodes before ending, being cancelled, and not being picked up again.) 

I miss seeing shows where the male lead has to keep the secret or deal with someone knowing their secret and trying to live with it. All of it based more in a realistic reality of the actual world, while still be fictitious enough to have things that could never happen in reality as well.

I know there are some show or movies out there similar, but they don’t fit my tastes or I did watch them for a time and then stopped cause they started getting crazy or boring for me.

I’m not one for watching something with sex in it, nor a lot of demonic things in it either. Some exceptions have been Angel and Buffy, but those are more supernatural fiction. I tried watch Vampire Diaries and did enjoy it for a time, same with the Teen Wolf series, but they both got to a point I couldn’t stand them and just stopped watching and couldn’t get myself to watch them again. I’ve tried with Teen Wolf, but just got bored.

I did try watching some of True Blood to see what it was like and only came out enjoying the theme song and left that quick. I don’t think I made it past the first episode.

Tried watching Penny Dreadful and same thing happened. The Sabrina remake as well. One ep and then I ditched it. I hated the the demonic stuff and just dipped. Made me miss the 90s show I grew up all the more.

I used to watch Forever Knight as a kid, She Wolf, and Beauty and the Beast as well, but not really into watching the super older shows of late 80s early 90s right now.

Also sucks how I can’t get season 2 of Invisible Man (2000) in the US. UK is lucky and got the second season of Invisible Man, we only got Season 1, which I bought up so fast. Though based more in science, Invisible Man was another good one. Poor guy couldn’t catch a break. Miss it so much.

(The Invisible Man (2000) (Thankfully, though only 2 seasons, the series got to end with an actually ending.)

Thankful we keep getting Psych movies every few years or so, though movie 2 and 3 haven’t been available to buy yet, which is frustrating since they only show it on peacock, though 2 was on USA recently and 4 is in the works.

(Psych (2006-2014, Movies ongoing)

Enjoyed watching Dracula, the NBC, not the BBC one. That one I hated. I enjoyed Jekyll and Sherlock, but Dracula was horrible.

Dracula NBC ended too soon.

(Dracula (2013))

One I didn’t see until after it aired, that for a time was free to watch on old Hulu, was The Crow: Stairway to Heaven. Very 90′s, but enjoyable all the same.

(The Crow: Stairway to Heaven (1998) and yes that is Mark Dacascos probably known by many as The Chairman of Iron Cheif.)

Which I recently found out they finally have made a remake of the 90′s movie with Bill Skarsgard that I hope will be good. Just leaves adding any vfx and so on they need to before release.

Many will know him more as Pennywise the Clown and leads into why I sat through watching all of Hemlock Grove.

Only good reason to watch that show on Netflix. 

It has Vampires and Werewolves and more, but man, it isn’t worth it in the end with the plot they give.

So, yeah, really wish we got more immortal / undead whump with possible wholesome romances.

[newtonsheffield]

hi! Can I ask a question about puma shoes? They are doing a sale online and I’m thinking of buying them for the first time in my life. I saw many reviews that say “puma shoes tend to feel tight, so buy a size that’s slightly larger than your usual one.” Would you agree? 🤔 sorry for the dumb question but you own a lot of shoes so I thought maybe I could ask for your help 🥹

No problems, happy to help: I have opinions on just about every brand of sneakers. Fun fact: I just bought some air Jordan’s (Low) very excited about them.

So, puma sneakers: I have a few pairs.

I always buy my actual size, I do think they run a little tighter, but for me, it’s not worth getting a larger size for how tight they are. I find Puma shoes a little wider for the most part, comparing like Puma classic suede sneakers to an Adidas Gazelle for example.

Just my two cents.

My biggest hot tip for sneakers though: Order your european size, not US or UK. I know I am always a 42, and the size guide will tell you what that equates to in their brand in US or UK depending where you are. But I find the Euro size to be most reliable.

I also fitted running shoes for 6 years while I was at University and I found that to be true for the most part then also.

Hope that was a little helpful

[walks-the-ages]

"Favorite Doctor Survey" Update February 11th, 2023, ~9pm Eastern Standard Time:

[ID: a screenshot of a pie chart which has a multitude of colors in sections, the largest being labeled with percentages of 23.3%, 16.3%, 11.6%, and two are labled 7% while the rest are not labeled. there is a list of Doctor Who incarnations off to the side with color coding which trails off. end ID]

So far, we have 43 votes, and right now, the 8th Doctor is in the lead with 10 votes, aka 23.3%!

I am extremely delighted with this fact, we need more people to appreciate the Eighth Doctor ~! For anyone who is unaware of it, the Eighth Doctor is not limited to just the 1997 TV movie and a few minutes in Power of the Doctor--

--oh no, this Bestest Boy Ever has not only over a hundred audio dramas (and counting!!) on Big Finish, but also at least 74 Novels to his interation! If you do not know the Eighth Doctor yet, now is your excuse to go watch his movie on the web archive and then dive into the world of Big Finish to experience his adventures with Charley! :D

*Ahem* So, onto the next "Favorite Doctor!"

To no-ones surprise, the Twelfth Doctor, played by Peter Capaldi is holding steady in second place, with 9 votes!

There's a slight error in the graph because I realized I'd forgotten to add his actor and year to the 12th doctor listing and the answers already submitted didn't get edited, so Peter Capaldi's 12th Doctor is not just the dark teal 16.3% you see above, but also the dark blue right underneath it which is the first 2 original votes before the updated info.

In 3rd place, appropriately enough, we have the Third Doctor, played by Jon Pertwee! He currently has 5 votes, aka 11.6%!

Everyone seems to love his dynamics with UNIT, being earthbound, and his fatherly/grandfatherly relationships with his companions-- not to mention his chemistry with The Master!

Tied for 4th place, we have the Sixth and Second Doctors, each with 3 votes, aka 7% !

One, Five, Nine, and Ten each have 2 votes,

Four, The Valyard, The Shalka!Doctor, Eleven, and Thirteen all have 1 vote each,

and so far we have two write-in answers: one vote for "The Lethian Campaign Assassin" (an extremely intriguing wiki article) and one vote for the Master!Doctor from Power of the Doctor :D

Let's keep those votes rolling in! I pretty much have no time limit on this poll lol, i'll just post periodically when there's a significant number of new votes or if someone else takes the lead!

In the meanwhile if you haven't taken the survey yet, here is the link to cast your vote:

And if you'd like to see what all the hype is about for the Eighth Doctor, here is a link to a gorgeous fan-made upscaling of the movie, which was posted to the archive by the uploader-- you can stream it from the archive (make sure you set it to 1080p and give it plenty of time to buffer!)

Or, even better, download the mkv video, and use VLC media player or a similar open source program so you can adjust the playback speed to around 96% for the proper pitch and speed!

When they were doing US to UK conversion they uh. lol they fucked up the framerate so to fix it the movie was sped up on release, so watching it without adjusting the playback speed will make everyone sound like chipmunks comparison to their normal voices, but can also cause some motion sickness from the weird, fast framerate

! So I highly reccomend downloading it so you can adjust the playback speed a custom amount! Oh, and don't forget to favorite to show the upscaler some love for their hard work, they made it into a beautiful masterpiece! [ it literally looks better than my physical dvd i bought years ago lol]

If you'd like to dip your toes into some other, slightly more obscure Doctors featured on this survey, I also have a link to the 4k Upscaling of "the Scream of the Shalka", an animated Doctor Who episode from 2003, which was never continued (on screen at least; it has one short story sequel written available online, "The Feast of the Stone"!

Scream of the Shalka, in 4k HD, again, thanks to fans taking the time to upscale things!

Scream of the Shalka short story sequel:

(please note for fellow Shinigami-Eyes users, there is no transphobia in the short story, the entire BBC website is now universally marked red in shinigami eyes)

[the-empress-7]

I received this ask from an anon, and full disclosure that I have edited to remove references to someone who is Royal adjacent but not a public figure. I'd hate to get shut down for that reason. Anyway here is the ask, thanks to the anon who sent it in.

-----

I know there has been some discourse regarding Charles (if we may call it discourse) around here and let me tell you… Let’s say I used to work for an upper class family close to the royal family until January this year, when I switched jobs. I was something like a PA to a member of the family and they have a title and this is how much personal info I’ll give you. Charles is a master of deceit and press releases in his own eyes. He is using the same strategies he used in the 90s back when he was fighting Diana and they didn’t work then, but His Royal Highness is convinced they’ll work this time. 

Charles has this unhealthy habit of expressing his love for people by covering up their misdemeanours and paying off the press. This usually works for smaller transgressions. He expressed his love for his second alleged son by buying his way to Eton and Sandhurst but this is public knowledge. What is far worse is that he pays for people close to him, like Michael Fawcett. Fawcett’s finances are very, let’s say, problematic. He takes loans he can’t pay back and plays with fires he can’t put out. I think we all saw the latest incident.

Plus you can see how much he dislikes Andrew by doing nothing for his image. 

Charles cares for his image very much, I’ve been told that he puts out stories about William’s spending (the potential new house, the helicopter rides, the holidays) and uses the Cambridges for good press. Doesn’t mean he doesn’t love them, but he is aware of the positive press they generate. For example, he did a photoshoot with his grandchildren and Camilla’s grandchildren too, but William pulled the plug on the images being released because he felt his children were overexposed. Plus, the other grandchildren were missing from the picture and it would generate bad press. And here is the key problem: Charles does what Charles thinks is best. Charles and Camilla crashed the Bond red carpet because he was convinced it would be good to be seen with his son and very popular daughter-in-law, but it backfired as everyone talked about THAT dress. He convinced WIlliam to take Harry to the Spectre red carpet as he saw that as a way to generate good press for Harry. Another fun fact: he has a say in who he hires and if the Cambridges find a good staffer for them he has a habit of snatching them up, like his social media team. 

Another gold nugget from his cover ups: Harry’s spending habits. I’ve been told that Harry bought Meghan very pricey jewellery and gifts from the Duchy of Cornwall funds he receives, which is nothing he is prohibited from doing, but Charles had to cover that up, as well as Meghan’s spending and relationship with staff, and the Spencers (I wish I had more tea on this, all I know, the Spencers hate her guts). There was even one story that he tried to buy Meghan a car, but Charles stopped him and offered one of his cars for her until she adapts to London but she actually never got a permit in the UK. 

It’s actually disgusting what he does with his press releases and briefings, especially with his oldest son. 

[thebunnylord]

Some ttte human headcanons for characters I don’t like

Rebecca: Rebecca has Parkinson’s disease, she gets tremors that she cannot control, she gets frustrated at not being able to control her body similar to her engine counterpart where she has the wheel slip issue that she cannot control. She and Henry are both members of the chronic illness club and hang out with each other as they can relate to each other with their struggles with a chronic illness. Rebecca being younger often looks up to Henry who’s older than she is. Just like her engine counterpart, she is a people pleaser to a fault and really wants to impress Gordon. She also once cried over a dish set that had a scuffed up and damaged box because she was afraid no one was going to buy it and love it, so she bought it.

Caitlin: she has ADHD and is often unaware of volume and hyperactivity. She gets frustrated when she is told to calm down because she has trouble relaxing, she also has trouble sleeping and can be a bit reckless (this includes racing down the mainline)

Connor: also has ADHD, enough said.

Sydney: after sustaining a serious head injury in a crash, he can’t form new memories. He knows who he is and his past before his injury, but other than that, he can’t remember anything. He keeps lists everywhere to try and help him remember (though he keeps forgetting to make those lists or read them) and he has sticky notes everywhere reminding him to read certain sticky notes. Percy did give him a planner to help him keep track of things, but he just forgets to either write in it, or look at it. What does seem to help is if he repeats what he needs to remember out loud, or record it on a tape recorder.

Bruno: disclaimer I have never watched AEG because I am too cultured to stoop that low, Bruno is originally from America, his parents moved to the UK when he was five, he has autism and struggles to make friends at school, he’s about primary school age and prefers watching people than playing with them. He also loves trains even though they can be too loud for him. One day he decides to skip school and go down to the yard and watch the engines instead of putting up with the kids at school and being made to play with them by his teacher (fun fact: this happened to me in second grade, my teacher assigned two girls to play with me at recess and told me to play with real friends when I introduced her to my shadow. I hated every single moment of it as recess was my time to recharge)

Then Diesel came in the yard and while he was refueling his engine, Bruno just walked up to him and asked if he could watch. Diesel had no idea what to do and was stuck with Bruno following him around all day until finally the police arrived and took Bruno home. They still hang out together after school, and Bruno likes watching him shunt in the yard and the mechanics work on his engine.

[tellthemeerkatsitsfine]

Okay, everyone, it’s here. Nish Kumar’s 2022 show Your Power, Your Control, on TV for everyone to see. If there’s anyone who wants to see it and can’t, send me a message or a non-anonymous ask and I’ll send you a link. Anyone, really. I really, really want everyone to watch this, and I am happy to share with absolutely everyone. I say this because I know what the culture’s like on this site, how people think “Oh I don’t know, I haven’t talked to that person before, I can’t just message them out of nowhere, it would be weird.” It won’t be. Even if I’ve never interacted with you before and we’re not mutuals or anything, if you want a link, ask. I want to spread this. Though if you live in the UK and are able to, you should watch this through official channels (Sky and Now TV) so he’ll get whatever support he’ll get from viewcount.

I saw this show twice last year. Once in mid-May in New York City, and once in late July in Montreal. When I booked tickets for his show in NYC, I didn’t know he was going to take the show to Just For Laughs in Montreal. If I had know that, I wouldn’t have booked the NYC tickets, because NYC is an 8.5-hour drive away, and requires crossing a national border, while Montreal is two hours away and in the same country as me. However, I’m glad I bought those tickets before I knew. Because the NYC show was amazing, and it was worth seeing twice. I hated the NYC trip, overall. My dad and I spent all day Saturday driving there, then slept on my brother’s uncomfortable couch (he was briefly living there at the time, so at least we didn’t have to pay for accommodation, which was nice), then spent all day Sunday driving back. I’d never been to that city before, and I didn’t like it, with its crowds and its skyrocketed COVID rates but no one was wearing masks, and its general atmosphere that I just hated. I hated every moment of the trip during which I was not in a room with Nish Kumar. And the whole thing was still worth it. And then of course I saw it again in Montreal. That’s how good a show it was.

The show changed a bit in the couple of months between the two I saw. The most notable being that in NYC, he complained about comedians who use their platform to be a dick to minorities, and then shouted: “Fuck you Dave Chappelle, fuck you Ricky Gervais!” In Montreal, he did the same routine, but this time ended it with: “Fuck you Dave Chapelle, fuck you Ricky Gervais, fuck you Jimmy Carr!” I am a bit curious to see if he leaves all those names in on the filmed version, particularly the last one as he was hanging out with Jimmy Carr on Katherine Ryan’s couch for her Backstage TV show not too long before this, it might fuck that up a bit.

The shows were mostly the same though, you don’t tend to take a show from England to NYC unless you’ve got your material pretty well worked out. The Montreal one did have some references to the fact that an Off Menu episode was recorded live at that same festival earlier that afternoon, and most of his audience had been there (I hadn’t been – I’d considered it because I like Ed Gamble and James Acaster, but the ticket price wasn’t worth it for a podcast I don’t listen to). He made a bunch of jokes about Ed and James, and then after some particularly harsh making fun of them, he added, “Obviously I’m just kidding, I love those guys, they’re my friends. I meant what I said about Gervais and Carr, though.”

Oh, there was something else that happened in Montreal but not in NYC. In Montreal, he was doing the part of the show where he explains that online abuse happens to everyone in the public eye, but it gets worse the more levels you are away from what’s thought of as the “default”. Then he started listing levels of “default”: white, straight, male, heterosexual, able-bodied, etc.

As he did so, I became very aware of my best friend, who was sitting next to me. I had dragged my best friend to Montreal with me, because I loved the show so much and I wanted him to see it too. He, however, is not into stand-up comedy. He’s not into any of this sort of thing at all. I’ve known him for 20 years, I met him because we were teammates in high school, and then after high school we took over as coaches, and we’ve now run a wrestling team together for many years. He is a 35-year-old (now 36) white straight guy who’s been an athlete all his life, and he looks it. He’s really cool for a jock, I swear. He’s a nice guy, he’s a feminist, he’s worked with me for many years to try to fight against the fucked up culture in sport. But he doesn’t, you know, look it. He looks like a jock. And he is a jock. He did not look like he belonged in a Nish Kumar gig. I didn’t realize how much he’d not fit in until we actually go there, and we sat in the front row of the 128-seat room, and everyone else looked like an artsy nerd, and I guess I looked like whatever in-between thing I am, and my best friend looked like a guy who should be in a sports bar and not in a Nish Kumar gig.

Anyway, when Nish Kumar started listing all the definitions of default, I felt slightly awkward, because my best friend is all those things. Now, I want to be clear, because Nis Kumar gets accused of this all the time and it’s fucking horrible when people say that shit: he was not deliberately making the rich straight white men in the room uncomfortable. He wasn’t saying “Fuck those people for being the default”. He was saying “It’s a fact that those people being the default mean, all else equal, they’ll get less online abuse than a visible minority for doing the same shit.” When I saw I felt a bit awkward, I mean that in a sort of affectionate way, when you’re sort of affectionately “called out” by a part of a comedy show, not that Nish Kumar was genuinely making his room an unsafe space for rich white men. Nish Kumar does not hate rich white men! Some of his best friends are Ed Gamble.

But I knew it was already a bit awkward for my friend, so when Nish started listing “straight, white, able-bodied, heterosexual…”, I put a hand on my friend’s shoulder, in a kind of reassuring way. Nish Kumar saw me do this, and stopped talking to laugh. Nish Kumar. Nish Kumar laughed, because of something I did, with the trademark wild infectious Nish Kumar laugh. Then he asked me, “Do you know that guy?” I said yes, and he said oh good, because it had looked like I might be just taking a guess about what he’s like based on his appearance. And that interaction with Nish Kumar is in the top ten coolest fucking things that’s ever happened to me.

So those are my personal stories from seeing that show. I know what it was like in May 2022, and I know it was like in July 2022, and I’m very curious as to what it was like in October 2022, which is when it was filmed. Both times I saw it, it ended with an extended routine about how fucked up it is that Britain worships some old lady (queen) and some special song (national anthem) and the big towel (flag). After that routine, he says, wouldn’t it be weird if she died while I was on stage? When people ask you where you were when the queen died, you’d have to say you were in a theatre, listening to a comedian be, if anything, too respectful about her.

…So even though I’ve seen the show twice, I’m guessing there will be at least a bit of stuff I haven’t heard before in the filmed version, because he’ll have to have rewritten that by October. There was also some stuff early in the show about Boris Johnson that was pretty current to when I saw it, I guess that’ll be different in October too. I’m looking forward to seeing that.

This post has been my preamble before I watch the long-awaited actual special. Just a place to record my thoughts going into it. I’m going to actually watch it now, and see how it compares to my memory of it. My memory of it is of one that did perfectly what I love in comedy – cover important personal stuff and cover important political stuff and tie the two together. Any show that does all three well, while also being funny, immediately becomes a favourite of mine (for another show that does that well, see Ahir Shah’s Ends, which just won the Edinburgh award and I’m very pleased about that). And God, it was fucking funny. Nish Kumar started the energy high, and I remember that both times I kept expecting him to at least start to run out of steam, and he never did. Never slowed down for a moment. Shouted at the crowd at a million words a minute, like he couldn’t wait to tell us everything he had to say, because it mattered and because it was worth saying and because it was funny enough to merit the time and space. I remember losing my breath laughing over and over and over, both times. I am prepared for the fact that some of that came from the atmosphere in the room and it won’t hit quite as hard through a screen. But still, it’s brilliant material, everyone needs to watch it. Like I said, message me for a link. I am here to spread the good news of Nish Kumar.

Also, happy birthday, Nish. It's a good day for comedy.

[illusionsofdreaming]

hey, it's owhda. how have you been? it's a little bit sad to see no updates on tumblr from you(I mean any, even just a talk) but that just mean there's something else going on in your life and I sincerely hope it's something good. I didn't really know you much but I really thought that you could be a good friend to have. So.. could we get a glimpse into your life? How's your work? What are you interested in right now?

Hello, hello! It's so nice to see some familiar faces still hanging around this dusty blog! I've missed interacting with you both and Tumblr in general, it's very humbling to know people are reminded of me from time to time. I guess now is as good a time as any to post a little update on what's been going on in my life, how that's affected my writing and what I've got planned for the blog in the coming future. For those who wish to skip the chatter, tldr; I'm hanging on, this will blog will remain online and I do have plans to continue writing.

Let’s see… where do I even begin? Shortly after May, I’ve received an exciting notice - I was promoted! It’s a goal I’ve been working on for some time so it was quite satisfying to hear the news. Since then it’s been a whirlwind of activities - trying to juggle my new responsibilities and manage my own team took some time getting used to. I’ve worked solo for so long it was difficult to be the ‘leader’. In fact - I still am uncomfortable being one, but I’m starting to get the grasp of it.

I’ve been traveling for work as well and in these few months have been to Japan and UK. Both trips where I fell severely ill because my weak body can’t cross countries without making complaints and making me feel my age. Oh. And I finally got Covid in November which really laid me low for at least 2 weeks. 

I realise my health’s been taking a hit lately. Perhaps its the stress of having more work on my plate and being in a new position but I’ve been getting sick more easily. I’m currently recovering from a throat infection that I got from my UK trip as I write this - so fun times.

So yeah.. it’s been a lot of paperwork, electronic work, a lot of self reflection and remoulding of myself to my real life that really put writing on the back burner. I always wrote at night after work but nowadays I don’t even have the energy for that. If I’m not dead asleep by the time I’m done with work then some infection, flu or cold will get me. 

…and the longer I don’t touch my writing the less I wish to open my WIPs because I have a silly, irrational fear that I no longer write the same way I use to - either I’ve deteriorated or my style’s changed. It’s silly. 

Good news is that, I think I’ve finally found my pace, my new position is no longer ‘new’ but the norm and I’m slowly finding ways to carve out my own personal time in my new schedule. Which is why I’ve decided to tackle this issue today. To be honest, it’s been a while since I wrote anything fictional, but I’m planning on slowly working through the writing blocks that have built up due to my neglect. I’ve bought 2 new books during my trip in UK so that’s a step in the right direction right?

As some of my older followers would know and recognise by now, I do tend to go through highs and lows when it comes to activity on this blog. It often reflects what’s going on in my personal life haha. But lately, the creative bug that has been out of energy seemed to have been slightly rejuvenated - my habits of hyperfixating on creative mediums is rearing its head again so I know it’ll only be a matter of time before I’m itching to write again. 

About what..? TCF is still on my mind but not as much as before since it’s been some time since I last read its chapters. Lately I’ve been reading Absolute Sword Sense and am keeping up with its chapters so far. I’ve yet to get the newest Fire Emblem game and have been doing great avoiding any and all spoilers so far - but I’m pretty sure it’ll be going on my list of series I’ll write for in the future.

My health issues are to be tackled another day because I’m frankly, quite tired of taking meds. 

As for where I wish to take the blog… hmm.. that’s really a tough decision because I’ve never really had a clear goal in mind when it comes to this blog. It was just a great space to share my thoughts on fandoms and interact with likeminded people. I don’t think I’ll be opening requests for a while since I’ve got a huge backlog of WIPs to work on. I suppose I could attempt to keep the blog less.. dead? Not sure how I’ll go about it though.

Anyways.. that’s about it. Terribly sorry for the word vomit, I hope everyone's been doing well and enjoying your life! If it seems I'm a bit dead without updates, it's usually because there aren't any chatter related inboxes haha. So is this illu's call for random stories to be dropped in their mail? Yes.