#HE HAD THAT LINE READY TO FUCKING GO. IM EXHAUSTED

[spohkh]

i...... seo do young doing everything he can fucking think of to get dong soo hooked on him so that he changes his mind about wanting to leave do young is making me CRAAAAZZZYYYYYYY..... maybe if i offer him even more revenge...maybe if i give him a car... he wont run away from me he'll let me keep him without a fuss.... do young doesnt even seem to question his fixation on dong soo hes just rolling with it ... "i see it i like it i want it i got it" type mentality

and hes so used to actualizing his desires that i feel even though hes having some fun with dong soo pushing back right now, if the time comes when it seems like he may for real for real have to give dong soo up, its ABSOLUTELY gonna b a "everything i let go of had claw marks on it" moment...cant wait❤️

[lunarw0rks]

laying down in bed with simon after you both finally come home and you start sharing stories and going over stuff that happened back at the base—he’s just quietly listening along until you mention how one of the soldiers purposely played the victim card when they tripped and fell. and simon would start LAUGHING. like not giggling, laughing. and you try to play it cool on the inside but you’re nearly ready to explode with excitement.

you’d be saying something like, ‘im serious simon. he milked the fuck outta that injury, all he did was trip over a dandelion. tell me why i saw him the next day walking into the mess hall with a cast on and crutches?’ and he’d fucking lose his mind

dude. imagine how comfortable he would have to be to LAUGH around someone. not his usual scoff or chuckle, but to genuinely find something hilarious.

you're both exhausted; muscles achy and sore, throats raw and dry, minds foggy and worn. all you desire to do — all you can do, is fall on the bed next to each other.

as always, simon silently nods and listens as you ramble about your eventful day. even if not much happened, he's going to listen. today was a treat, though, if you were to put it lightly.

"kid you not, simon, this rookie is going to drive me up the wall." you clench your fists as you picture the aggravating event. the rookie that had cried wolf, and somehow got away with it.

you've peaked the lieutenant's interest, making him raise a brow. "oh yeah, need me to kick his ass?"

his eagerness makes you scoff playfully. you wish it were that simple. "not that kind of problem," you say, continuing on with the story. "he tripped over a stick. claims he broke his foot — and now he's been cleared for light duties, all while my team and i pick up his slack."

from folded behind his head, his hand shot out to his mouth, failing to conceal the brief cackle you caused him. if there was one thing he had plenty of experience wit, it was pain-in-the-ass recruits. not laughter. that was new.

"a bloody stick?!" he exclaims, shaking his head at the ridiculousness. the silver lining to the bureaucracy, was that you had successfully lightened the damper on his mood. "if you want, love, I can make sure he's actually broken his foot. teach him not to cry wolf?" would he? probably. and honestly, you weren't that opposed. the recruit was a proper prick who hadn't gotten his rude awakening yet.

"this stick," he spoke after a few seconds of gentle chuckles, rolling over to face you. "how big are we talking? me big, or...?"

cheeky bastard.

[iibonniee]

You Were Always Mine

Pairing: Im Changkyun x Reader

Genre: Smut

Warnings: ex!changkyun, unprotected sex, creampie, impregnation kink, oral (male receiving), public sex

Rating: R

Word Count: 3.6k

Summary: The two of them always had a game of cat and mouse. She was the mouse, and he was the cat. The cat never lets their pray get away.

Masterlist | Tags: @beautifulworldandmore @kyunnielove @iamkyunie @doveslittlekpoparchive @dessianna1

It only took three seconds after the clock on her phone hit 8:30 for him to walk in. It always felt like clockwork, and she felt like she knew him better than anyone. Her eyes were glued to his movements. How he stood at the bar entrance — not a single care in the world — showed that he was blocking excited patrons from entering. He had a goal in mind.

She was far too exhausted tonight to mingle in the crowd to run from his browsing eyes. She knew what his game plan was. After all, his messages on her phone swarmed like flies, ranging from passive-aggressive to downright semi-nude. He was a good fuck; she had to give him that much. But she knows that if she kept feeding him more and more, there would be no real reason to call him her ex.

But here she was, unmoving from the bar stool directly across the bar entrance. Her lips wrapped around the rim of her martini. She could always pick a different bar. She knew she should, but then that silly game of cat and mouse would continue. While it was fun, she had to admit his dick was always just too good to run from.

Whether it was fucking her or just in her mouth, why would she run from that?

Y/N groaned and rolled her eyes, thankful the club music was just a bit too loud for the drunken girl beside her to notice. She should have known better than to dare to sit here. Was misinformation her ally or foe here? She could only imagine what ridiculous stunt he was going to pull next. His ideology seemed to be “bigger, bolder, more daring,” which drew her to him in the first place.

She allowed her arm to fall, each finger trailing down the stem of her glass, carefully spinning it around the coaster. A slight smirk grew on her face. She so enjoyed playing the role of the irresistible bait, as much as she hated to admit that much out loud. His predatory instincts made him even more appealing, his brown eyes often a shade darker in his approach, or perhaps it was the drink washing her worries away, clouds blurring her better judgment.

Should she leave, making herself out to be the elusive prey yet again? Or should she stay and match his boldness with her own? Tease, bait, invite - it was all just a dance she enjoyed too much. Each step, each swirl, was addictive and exhilarating. And each little private victory gave her the satisfaction, the validation she constantly sought.

Yet, she never considered herself the victim. No, her heart didn’t stand a chance in this battle of the sexes. Instead, she amused herself by laughing, both at her lack of restraint and at the nature of man, ever persistent in his pursuits. She realized that the line between attraction and addiction was easily blurred under the glimmer of the club’s neon lights.

Her eyes flicked up, and there he was, flashing his characteristic smirk the moment his eyes finally met her own, ready to play another round of their dangerously addictive game. She showed no such emotions back. Instead, she stood up from the bar, her eyes meeting his own once more before she snuck away.

In one swift motion, she managed her escape, mingling swiftly with the crowd, her sleek figure disappearing amongst the jubilant mass. Yet, her eyes never left his figure, her heart pounding in anticipation of the thrill that was to come. The club’s neon lights play a kaleidoscope on the glossy floor leading the path to her sanctuary - the girls’ bathroom.

Despite the loud club music drowning out any particulars, he could still sense her fleeting figure like a predator in tune with its prey. As interested spectators made space for him, he pursued, the constant smirk playing on his face, witnessing his confidence.

She slipped into the girls’ bathroom through the crowd, the feminine echo of laughter and chatter creating the perfect shield for her. Much like a safe haven, she sought refuge in its familiar tiles, the fluorescent lights glaring in sharp contrast to the club’s ambient neon.

Yet in the game of cat and mouse, they played, sanctuary was momentary. She knew he would wait for her to leave the bathroom. She watched as the drunken girls giggled their way out of the bathroom, and she was met with silence. Even in the comforting silence of the bathroom, she could discern the faint musings of the music that struggled to seep in - the bass of the clubs’ anthem pulsating in sync with her heartbeat. Her reflection stared back, eyes revealing a wild exhilaration that she was all too familiar with. The flickering neon light of the bathroom danced on her face, painting a beautiful paradox of vulnerability and intent.

Just as she was about to collect herself, the silence was broken by an uncalled disturbance. The metallic barrier that demarcated her sanctuary had been breached. A figure had entered, his silhouette speaking volumes of the audacity she had grown to enjoy. The trademark smirk, beautifully lit under the urban neon, revolted against the defined norms, entering the feminine haven that was the ladies restroom.

She watched as he locked the door behind him and leaned against him. His eyes never left her own, staring her down with pointed daggers ready to strike and cut if and when he could.

“This is the lady’s restroom, Changkyun.” She was the first to speak, leaning against the marble sink to keep herself up. The game of cat and mouse was about to end. Changkyun looked far too hungry to wait another moment.

“You enjoy this little game of ours, don’t you?” His voice was hoarse, his eyes darkened as he stayed unmoving. She watched as his eyes traveled over her body, then a groan left his lips. “You… you drive me fucking insane, Y/N. I can’t get enough of you. I want you all the time. It drives me fucking insane. I can’t even think about fucking someone else when I know I can just find you and just make you mine again. How much do you miss me?”

She watched as he pushed himself away from the door and slowly stalked towards her. His movements were slow but full of purpose and precision. He wanted to scare her and let her know that her running had consequences. His kind act was just a front for her to cave.

And she knew she would.

Her breath hitched when he stopped in front of her. His familiar scent filled her space way too quickly. His warm hand cupping her cheek was just the beginning, and she knew far too well what would unravel next.

“I missed you, baby. How much did you miss my cock, baby girl? I bet you missed choking on it,” He murmured, his fingers tracing her jawline almost affectionately. His voice was a husky whisper, so intimate in the hollow silence of the restroom. Yet, it held an undercurrent of dominance she was familiar with.

“No, I didn’t,” she retorted, voice steady despite her heart hammering against her ribcage. It was a lie, of course. It was all she ever thought about. Her witty response was her defense, a mesh of defiance wrapped around a soft core. She met his heated gaze, an open challenge, unyielding and defiant, resisting the fear that threatened to shake her nerve.

Yet deep down, she knew Changkyun had a way of teasing out her vulnerabilities. His brand of seduction was potent, a battle of wills in their dangerously addictive game of seduction and dominance.

His smirk grew at her response. It appeared almost predatory. He was aware of his effect on her, the tingle of anticipation he could evoke. Yet, he was wholly unprepared for the resistance she displayed.

“Oh really, baby?” His dark eyes gleamed under the fluorescent lights of the restroom, echoing his provocative sentiment. “You started this game… but remember, I play to win. Your lies won’t work on me.”

The tension between them was palpable, volatile, and invigorating. She watched as his soft expression changed. His gaze darkened, the softness replaced by a predatory gleam that quickened her pulse. The physical shift in his demeanor could have been attributed to the adrenaline pumping through them both. Still, she knew it was more than that. He tested her limits, challenging her as an opponent in this twisted game.

“On your knees, Y/N.” he commanded, the tone of his voice starkly contrasting with the tender caress that still lingered on her face. The words echoed around the vacant room, each syllable slicing through the thick tension hanging in the air.

Trapped by his magnetic gaze, she felt the words reverberate through her core. The audacious demand was invigorating. She looked up at him, her features calm amidst the storm. Here was the crucial turning point of their game - his bold demand met by her open defiance or willing submission. They both knew well this was no longer about power but about control. The bathroom’s fluorescent lights witness their complicated dance of seduction and resistance.

“Changkyun, we’re in the bathroom. A public bathroom.” She tried, but she knew her efforts were to be in vain. His dark expression remained unchanging. She knew his mind was set in stone.

“That didn’t matter whenever I would finger fuck you at dinner with the boys, now did it? Or may I remind you when I fucked you so hard in an alleyway I had to force you from screaming and drawing attention to us.” His retort hung heavy in the air, reminders of their previous dalliances now fuel to the fire.

Her blush was visible in contrast to her otherwise steady face, the memories he draped into words causing a familiar stir. Changkyun had the knack for commanding control, for bending the norms and creating an element of the forbidden in the most mundane.

“This time is different,” she said, maintaining her defiant gaze, an attempt to reign in the control she once had. A weak protest, it was more of a plea than an assertion. But by now, they both knew he had set the confines of this game.

“Is it, now?” He returned, a mischievous side-smile accentuating his smug satisfaction. “As far as I remember, our little games never had any boundaries.” His words were a challenge, daring her, making her question her own reservations.

“That was when we were together, Changkyun.” She shot back, knowing that her attempts would be futile.

“Who said we broke up? Baby, I don’t fuck anyone else but you. You’re still mine. All fucking mine,” He grit, his eyes a dark shade of brown. She shuffled where she stood, entrapped by his hands, pinning her between the sink and his body. “So, get on your fucking knees, Y/N, and suck my cock like a good girl. I have so much cum to give you.”

Reluctantly, or so it seemed, she complied with his demand. Lowering herself until the cold ceramic tiles were beneath her knees, she allowed herself to look up at him, a picture of mischief and provocation etched on her face. The scenario felt dangerously intoxicating, their reckless game wrapped in anticipation and cloaked by the silence of the restroom.

“You know, Changkyun,” she began, hands lightly resting on his thighs, her voice soft yet playfully taunting. “Even when I’m on my knees, I’m still the one in control.”

With the fluorescent lights casting harsh shadows around them, she watched as his eyes never left hers. Now smirking, he tilted his head to the side, teasing her with his smirk.

“Let’s see about that.”

With a coy smile dancing on her lips, her fingers started their sinful journey up his muscular thighs. Her touch was feather-light yet powerful enough to make him shiver in anticipation. His breath hitched as he reveled in the seductive spectacle unfolding before him.

She met his gaze, her eyes swirling with a lustful cocktail of daring and desire. Lowering her head, she gingerly kissed the growing bulge in his trousers, her smirk never leaving her face, her eyes never breaking contact with his. The silence between them was thick with anticipation as she skillfully unbuckled his belt and unzipped his jeans.

Changkyun’s breath hitched as she delicately wrapped her fingers around his pulsating length, her touch bringing about an electrifying sensation that sent jolts of pleasure up his spine. She moved her hand up and down, evoking a raw groan from him that echoed in the room.

“Fuck, I missed you.” He groaned, his eyes trailing her movement. “My cock missed you and that filthy mouth of yours.”

The sight of him teetering on the edge, his face contorted with pleasure, was euphoric. It was her wicked game, and Changkyun was an eager participant. As she slowly lowered her head toward his trembling length, her eyes flicked upwards, catching his, a spark of victory igniting in her eyes.

She enveloped him with her lips, her tongue swirling around him in decadent exploration, savoring his taste. Changkyun’s grip tightened on the arms of the chair, his knuckles whitening at the acute pleasure ripping through his body.

Her actions became rhythmic, a sinful dance of her mouth on his length that had him gasping for breath, his fingers threading through her hair in a desperate effort to keep her close. The intensity escalated until he was a quaking mess beneath her.

“Shit, just like that baby girl.” His fingers curling in her hair, he gently but firmly redirected her movements, guiding her along his throbbing length. “Mmm, fuck. You take my cock so well. I knew you missed it.”

With each tantalizing swirl of her tongue, each decadent enfoldment of her lips around him, Changkyun found himself battling the convulsive waves of pleasure that threatened to prematurely bring him to his peak. He resisted the urge to close his eyes, preferring to feast on the sinful visual of her lips moving rhythmically on his arousal.

Her hooded eyes were locked onto his, holding an alluring blend of domination and submission. The delicious anticipation of her exploring his sensitive areas made him bite his lip, a husky groan emanating deep from his chest. The raw and animalistic sound-induced an irresistible vibration that traveled up his length, amplifying the pleasure.

The moist warmth of her mouth and the softness of her lips quickly drove him toward the height of his release. He could feel his resolve crumbling under the onslaught of her wicked expertise. He quickened his pace, gripping her lush hair more tautly as his body stiffened.

His pulse roared in his ears, his climax imminent. A guttural growl rumbled from his chest, warning her of his impending release. With a growing pride, she increased her pace, taking him deeper, refusing to break eye contact.

The sensations were too much. A strangled cry broke from his lips as his orgasm thundered through him, hot and potent, his body convulsing in waves of ultimate satisfaction. She did not break her rhythm until she had drained every last drop from him, swallowing his warm release with a provocative air of triumph.

Her sultry gaze and sensual smile curving her lips suggestively confirmed her control over his pleasure was absolute. His legs nearly gave out beneath him, but the victorious glow in her eyes was a sight he wouldn’t trade for anything else. Changkyun was indeed a willing captive in this lascivious game.

Catching his breath, he reacted swiftly, all prior tenderness replaced by a raw, primal desire. With a surge of strength, he pulled her up, his grip firm on her arms as he pivoted her to face the mirror. His smoky reflection locked gazes with her surprised one.

Forcefully, with little ceremony, he hoisted the hem of her dress, tugging it up until the fabric bunched around her waist. Her gasp was swallowed by the silence of the restroom as the cold air brushed against her bare skin. She clutched the edge of the sink basin, anticipation and a touch of apprehension igniting a flush in her cheeks.

“Look at us,” he murmured huskily, his fingers tracing electrifying paths on her thighs. “This is what control looks like.”

With the fluorescent lights casting a cruel, explicit glare on their reflections, the provocative reality of their position struck her. Yet, the intoxicating thrill that coursed through her veins at this lewd spectacle overpowered any semblance of regret or embarrassment. She was as much a part of this dangerous game as he was.

“I’m going to fuck you so good tonight Y/N. Everyone is going to hear you screaming my name. Shit, I might just put a baby in you.” He chuckled darkly, meeting her eyes in the mirror. “Wearing my favorite underwear tonight, too. Did you give up on our game? Did you just want me to fuck you instead of running from me, princess?”

Changkyun nudged her underwear to the side with a swift and audacious motion. As his fingers danced provocatively at her edge, a sharp intake of breath hitched in her throat.

“Fuck you.” she managed to retort, her voice but a sultry whisper drowned in the ambiance of the echoing restroom.

His responding grin mirrored devilishly in the reflection, was her only warning before he claimed her defiantly. Their gasps echoed in unison, bouncing off the cold tiles, amplifying the intoxicating symphony of their game.

A plethora of sensations rummaged through her – from his roughened fingers leaving their memory on her skin, his breath falling erratically on her nape, to the decadent intimacy of his intrusion. Barely clutching onto the edge of the sink basin, she cursed under her breath, bucking instinctively as he thrust into her without warning.

He took her breath away, every maddening thrust deeply etched onto the canvas of her memory. Unraveling under his touch and pace, she was yet not entirely defeated. Turning her head slightly, she locked eyes with him in the mirror - a silent, sensual challenge reflecting in her eyes, never backing down from their addictive, reckless game.

“Shit-“She cried out, surprised at his forcefulness.

“What is it?” He grunted as his eyes met hers through the mirror. “You’re already fucking soaked. There was no need for foreplay.”

As the thriving tension in the restroom escalated, the one thing clear beneath the spell of the fluorescent lights was this: their dangerous game had just been taken up a notch, and neither of them was ready to lose control. Neither of them wanted to lose.

“Does it feel good?” he husked in her ear, pushing her body against the cool sink. Changkyun’s heated gaze met hers in the reflection once more, the lust burning in them enough to make the room feel like it was on fire. She whimpered in response, her body betraying her with a fierce shudder of ecstasy. The way he filled her so completely was almost too much to bear.

The primal connection between their bodies was amplified in the silence. The need that bound them together was raw, elemental, shattering the last vestiges of their restraint.

“Changkyun,” she gasped out, her voice filled with raw desire as she dug her fingers into his forearm. “Fuck…”

Her reaction drew out a throaty groan from him, some of his control slipping at the sound of his name coming out so sweetly from her lips. His pace quickened, the primal rhythm of their bodies blending into a symphony of sinful pleasure. Each deep thrust had her craving more, her body twisting and bucking in sync with his savage rhythm.

The sharp sting of her nails digging into her own fisted skin and her cries for more further fueled his desire. He caught her neck firmly, pulling her so that her back was against his chest, eliciting a choked gasp that sent tremors running down his length. Changkyun could feel her reaching her climax, and he pushed her towards the edge, provoking whimpers that escalated into throaty cries of his name.

Her release rippled around him, her body clenching and contracting in waves around his throbbing length. Sensing her sweet downfall, Changkyun followed suit; his body stiffened as his climax hit, spilling hotly inside her with a guttural groan. Her name fell from his lips as a reverent whisper, their shared pleasure echoing through the dark room.

In the end, they were both breathless, their bodies still locked together amidst the remnants of spent desire. His forehead rested against her back while she clung to the sink, her body trembling softly beneath him. As he pressed gentle kisses on her sweat-laced shoulder, Changkyun knew he had lost, lost himself entirely to the woman staining his every thought with her intoxicating presence. He couldn’t care less.

“All fucking mine,” he said, finally breaking the silence. He withdrew slowly from her, shuddering slightly at the loss of warmth. “Look at my cum dripping out of your greedy hole.”

His words caused her to shiver. She felt his cum leaking down her leg, leaving her to feel emptier than before. His audacious remark resonated in the silent room, part warning, part claim. She glanced down past their intermingled bodies, alive with the aftermath of their reckless abandon. The telltale evidence adorned her thighs, starkly contrasting her flushed skin. Heat pooled within her at the salacious sight, a realization of their actions reverberating through her.

“No more running, Y/N. You are mine.”

[mushroommanstan]

Bullet Holes

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Shigaraki x nurse reader

Warnings: smut, handjob, noncon

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

He itched at the bandages, exhausted by both physical and mental irritation. How many god damn times did he have to say he was fine? Ok, yes, he DID get shot in the chest twice. But they didn’t hit anything important so no harm no fowl!

He just doesn’t see why he needs a nurse for the league. Having one would send the message (to himself) that they’re planning to fail. No. No, he doesn’t need a doctor. He has kurogiri, he has bandages, and he has tweezers. That’s all he needs.

His bedroom door creaked, sending a burst of unwanted hallway light into his dark room, effectively burning his retinas. He blinked, growling at the intrusion and turning in his swivel chair to see who it was. His eyes took a couple of seconds to adapt, but when they did….

Holy mother of all that was holy.

You were GORGEOUS. The instant his eyes cleared up he sat up straight instinctively, something which he never does. His eyes widened farther than they had before, dry eyes burning and begging him to blink but he’d be damned if he stopped looking at you for even a nanosecond. He didn’t even know your name and yet you had this weird control over his body. He wasn’t complaining though.

You had both hands behind your back, wait for him to say something, maybe along the lines of “hi I’m Shigaraki” or “get the fuck out”. Anything other than the way he was looking at you…. Guess you’ll have to be the one to break the ice.

“Uhm…” you cleared your throat, averting your eyes from his intense stare meekly. “I-Im y/n”

“Y/n…” he muttered, lips barely moving as his expression remained unchanged. Creepy.

“Y-you must be Shigaraki Tomura?”

Y-you said his name!

As soon as his name left your mouth anime-style blood shot out of his nose.

“OH JESUS!” You yelled, rushing over with a towel trying to put pressure on the bleeding. Unfortunately in doing so he got a good view down your shirt and the blood flow increased.

It took a while, but eventually you were able to stop it, having to stick tissues up his nose that turned red almost instantly, matching the tomato-red blush that painted his face. You wiped your forehead with the back of your hand, relieved that was over, and began doing what you were supposed to do the whole time.

Checking for damages, cleaning wounds, bandaging bullet holes, that sort of thing. The whole time he said nothing, just breathed heavily as his eyes followed you and his hands gripped the armrests of his chair tightly.

Obviously you noticed his boner. You didn’t even need to look, it was clear from how he was acting he was at full mast. You did get a glance though, and from the looks of it, he’s already surpassing his Sensei in something. Good for him.

Anyways, after it was all done you leaned back from the now shirtless Shigaraki, hoping that he would just let you go in silence.

“W-wait!”

Ah, damn. You were already so close to the door too.

You forced a fake smile, exhausted and more than a little creeped out, more than ready for this to be over.

“Yeah?” You asked, failing to hide your annoyance and you cursed yourself for it. You were so distracted by his… libido, that you forgot that who you were working for was the most infamously unstable man in Japan. You held your breath slightly, hoping to god that his obvious lust for you would help him forgive your unprofessional tone.

“I… I also got shot… in the thigh.” He leaned back into his chair, cock visibly twitching as you stared at him in confusion. You mentally replayed what kurogiri told you, even checked the handwritten list of things to look for. But nowhere could you remember anything about leg injuries.

It was an obvious trick. But at the same time, you really couldn’t afford leaving a potential injury of his untreated. The possibility of him sexually harassing you was far better than facing the consequences of anything getting infected. He was AFO’s heir, after all.

You breathed out, mentally preparing yourself for whatever he was planning as you sulked over to him. A devilish smile creeped over his face, drool escaping a little bit down the sides as you got on your knees before him. You shuddered. You’ll just take a quick peek, and then you’ll forget this ever happened.

You pulled his pant legs up, gently turning and feeling them with your fingers as they flexed from your touch. His leg hairs stood on end as your finger brushed over them, and you almost felt bad from the way his body was projecting his inexperience of contact. But one glance upwards at his facial expression removed all sympathy.

“H-higher. I got shot higher up.”

You mentally sighed, eyebrows scrunching together as you looked down in defeat. Your hands raised and pulled down his pants, his hips lifting slightly to help you. Thankfully, the boxers he was wearing were pretty short, so you could just look at the muscles without taking them off.

…..Huh

Well what do you know. There actually WAS a bullet hole. Damn, now you actually kind of feel bad for assu-

Two hands grabbed the back of your head yanked you towards him, effectively smushing your face against his crotch. He bucked his hips against your face, strong hands effectively keeping you trapped as you desperately squirmed beneath him.

He sympathetically shushed you between his whimpers, your nose being harshly ground into his sack as your muffled screams filled the air.

“S-shhh! I kn-ngaaah~ I know, I-I know, just… fuck… just a-ahh! Hold s-still!” He groaned, one hand leaving your head to dust his boxers and free his dick against your face. Thankfully his retraction of one hand allowed your head to squirm out of his grasp, you immediately falling backwards as you wiped the drool from your face.

You’d expect him to look frustrated or murder-y, but instead he looked at you… amused. Maybe a little impatient, but like a cat losing hold of a mouse in a small box. Like there was no where to escape to even when out of his grasp.

He moaned in pain dramatically, grasping his leg as he writhed in pain.

“Ugh… it really hurts… why won’t you treat it? It’s gonna get infected!”

What?!

“Huff… would be a shame if you left knowing I was still in pain. I would hate to think what would happen to you if you left the job… incomplete.” The last word rolled off his tongue, a suggestive purr that made bile rise up the back of your throat.

That unbelievable bastard!…he-he wouldnt!

“I can’t treat you while you’re…. molesting me.” You respond, trying to reason with an already full cup. His erection visibly twitched.

“Mmmm…. That’s a shame… guess you’re gonna have to take care of this first.”

You gulped, contractually backed into a corner. You run different scenarios in your head, none of them good. You didn’t have a choice and he knew it.

Begrudgingly, you made your way back to him on your hands and knees. He cackled darkly, his length visibly throbbing when your shaky hands planted themselves onto his knees. You couldn’t bring yourself to look up at him. Despite the consequences, you knew that if you saw the surely cocky face he was sporting you’d no doubt try to cave it in.

You took a deep breath, hand reluctantly raising to his length. As soon as your fingers ghosted over his shaft, he let out a lewd moan that reverberated around the room. Sensitive.

His pre-cum trickled over your fingers as they formed a loose fist, trying to jerk him off with the least amount of contact possible. He groaned at the contact, even with just the bare minimum of touches he could already feel himself becoming undone. To think, someone as stunningly beautiful as you would be touching him like you are right now, it’s shocking to say the least.

Oh god, what did he ever do to deserve this? Tell him so he could do it again.

His own firm grip formed over yours, forcing the rest of your hand to press into his junk. He mewled, using your hand as a soft barrier against his rough skin as he jerked off with it. You were nothing more than a toy right now, but frankly, you were just glad he was satisfying himself without the use of any of your holes.

His fingers ghosted over yours, puppeteering them and forcing them to squeeze at this tip on the upstrokes. His legs bounced and jerked in stimulation, almost throwing you off balance from time to time as one arm still rested on his knee for support. His grip on your hand kept you in place. You could feel cool drops of liquid land on your forehead and elbows, and you almost wanted to die when you realized he was drooling on you.

Like counting during a storm, you knew he was getting close based on his twitches getting closer together.

A part of you was relieved, very relieved, that it was almost over. In a couple of seconds you’d be able to finish up, go home, take a hot bath and forget all about this.

Another part of you was terrified because currently, his tip was angled towards you. If he didn’t by some miracle change the position of his cock then your face would take his full load.

Surprise surprise, he didn’t. His cock exploded against your face with a loud moan. Both his hands rising to smoosh your face into his package once more as it shot out his jizz like a fountain.

To say there was a lot would be an understatement.

It seemed like this guy basically never jerks off. He was back up to hell, a seemingly unending line of cum painting your face as he humped it vigorously.

In the back of your mind, you had realized that this is why he was so sensitive when you unwillingly touched him. His whole body must have been screaming for release. You almost felt bad for him as his behavior towards you started to make sense. It wasn’t enough to make you forgive him though.

Especially not when he’s still humping your face like an animal and drizzling your hair with his white release.

When he finally finished he sagged back, panting like he had just surfaced from the sea of lust he had nearly drowned in. Your face and hair was completely soaked in his backed up release, and you needed to wipe some of it from your eyes before you could stand to look up at him.

Now that he lied boneless before you, you figured you would finally be able to fix him up and leave. Hah, you were so naive.

A strong hand gripped your shaky wrists, the scalpel once between your fingers clattering to the floor in surprise. No… no! That’s impossible! There was no way he could recover from an orgasm that intense so quickly!

But there before you, was his cock, at full mast like nothing even happened. All your work in pleasing him going to waste, leaving you filled with the dread of having to start all over.

“Hah… don’t think I’m finished… hah… now this time, I want you to use your mouth.”

This was gonna be a long, long night.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

OK SO, I gotta apologize to @prettylittlebunnys because you/they sent in an ask and I did this whole fic before rereading the ask and realizing this wasn’t what you wanted.

I put effort into this so I’m gonna post this one anyways, BUT I wanna say I’m sorry and that even though I know it’s taking a butt-load of time, I will write your ask.

Please be patient it’s coming I promise

[mewhenimanangel]

spiderboy, miles morales x reader

part 1 ʚɞ part 2 ʚɞ part 3 ʚɞ part 4! ʚɞ part 5

pairing: earth 1610! miles morales x reader

chapter 4 synopsis: Rio invites you over for dinner after hearing how Miles stuck up for you at the party.

wc: 2.1k

warnings!: cursing, teens in love, kissing, suggestive themes, google translate spanish

translations: cariño - sweetie, venid a comeros los dos - come eat you two, mi pequeño caballero - my little gentleman, mantén esa puerta abierta chico - keep that door open, boy

It was Monday morning and you sat in the mirror getting ready for school. You did your usual school make up routine of mascara, concealer, blush, and signature lip combo. You let her braids hang down today and sprayed your perfume. "Mommy can you drive me to school today?" you asked your mother as you went to put food and water in Bobo's bowls. "Sure why?" she asked drinking her coffee. "Got that big doofy project and i'm not walking with all that" "Alright well hurry up cause I gotta go"

You grabbed the project from the closet and went to put it in the backseat of the car. You ran back upstairs to grab your bag and say bye to Bobo. You settled in the car putting your seatbelts on as your mom drove off. You got a little nervous knowing you'd have to see Miles face to face again. You had been texting non stop yesterday but now you'd have to see him again after their kiss.

You looked out the window to see Spider-man stopping some guy trying to rob a mini mart. "At least that boy's working hard to keep people safe" your mom said rubbernecking. "Yeah he's so cool" you said taking a picture of the scene. After a few minutes she pulled up in front of the school and you grabbed the project from the back.

Entering the building you made a B line to Mr. Johnson's class, not wanting to try and keep that in your locker. You walked in the classroom and saw Peter standing there with his partner talking to Mr. Johnson. "Yo n/n" he called out as you put the project on the back counter. "Hey Peter" you gave him a smile. "Listen I'm real sorry about that guy last night. Are you good?" he asked, sentimental for the first time like ever. "Yeah it's okay, I promise" you nervously laughed off. He came over and gave you a small hug, before you left to go to your locker.

Zoya and Kiona walked up to you "Hey bebe" she said resting her head against the locker. "Hey Z, hey Kiona" you greeted them. "Im already ready for the weekend. Feeling extra fucking tired today" you groaned slamming the locker shut. "Too real. I'm exhausted" Kiona agreed.

"Alright I'll see you guys later" you said turning down the opposite hallway. "Yo Y/n wait up!" you turned around, face dropping to see the guy who harassed you at the party. "How do you know my name?" you asked in a flat unamused tone. "That's not important, just wanted to say sorry" he brushed off. "Okay." you said beginning to walk away. He grabbed your arm before you could get too far.

"Wait! You're not gonna say anything back?" he asked seeming offended. "What else am I supposed to say to you? You said sorry I said okay." "Come on, no 'i forgive you'" you narrowed her eyes at him in disbelief. "I don't forgive you why would I forgive you??" you spat. "Because It wasn't that fucking serious" he rolled his eyes.

"Dude you gotta leave her the fuck alone" Miles said walking up beside you. He looked back and forth between you and Miles before walking off "Fuck this" "Thanks..again. Could've held my own there but" "I know you could've." he smiled. "Uh by the way, my mom wanted to know if you'd wanna come over for dinner" he asked.

When he came home last night his mom saw blood on his fist and asked him what happened. He said it was nothing until she pushed an answer out of him. He told her what happened and she ultimately decided to invite you over. After all her son has been at this girl's house and she barely even knows her.

You tried to contain your excitement and nervousness - his mom wanted to meet you. "U-uh yeah that sounds nice. When?" you asked hiding a smile. "Friday night. That okay with you?" he asked hoping you'd say yes. "Yeah I'll ask my mom but it should be fine" The bell rung and you realized you'd be late. "I'll see you later. Get ready to present" you said hurrying to your class.

In physics, you and Miles concluded your presentation on inertia by using toy cars and a ramp. "Nice job you two. You work well together." he said writing something on his clipboard. You looked at each other and smiled before sitting back down.

🩰

The week had gone by and your heart was racing. Your mom had given you permission to go to dinner at Miles' house so here you were in your mirror frantically trying to make a good impression. You went with a sort of calm 'classy' makeup look and let your braids stay down. You wore a black long sleeve knit sweater with a black pleated skirt and a pair of loafers with white socks. Your mom had bought a bouquet of flowers from the market and told you to give it to Mrs. Morales.

On the walk over to Miles' building, you were practically shaking. You walked up the stairs to his apartment and knocked on the door. The lady who opened it had curly hair braided over to one shoulder. You could see the resemblance to Miles so you assumed that was his mom. "Hi sweetie, you're Y/n I'm assuming" she smiled at you.

"Hi Mrs. Morales" you put your hand out to shake. "These are for you" you handed the woman the bouquet of roses. "Aww thank you, cariño. Jeff, baby, can you put these in some water" Just then a tall man came up behind her. "Hey, Y/n right?" to which you nodded her head. "Yeah Miles been chatting non stop about you. He's in his room by the way." "Dinner should be ready in about five minutes" Mrs. Morales told you.

You walked in and peeled your shoes off, before following Mr. Morales' direction of where his room was. His door was open so you looked in and saw him on his bed with headphones on, seemingly drawing something. You knocked to alert him of your presence. "Oh Y/n, I didn't hear you come in" he lit up "Yeah your mom let me in." "Hey I didn't know you draw" you stood there awkwardly looking around his room, eyes landing on his collectibles. "Hey I used to have this" you said holding it. "Yeah that's pretty rare..please don't open it" he said in a small voice. "I wouldn't, m'not stupid" you joked putting it back in its resting place.

You looked around again spotting a familiar mask sticking out of his drawer. "Oh you like spider-man too?" you asked, missing the way Miles' eyes almost popped out of his head. "Uh yeah...something like that" he sighed. "Miles dinner's ready, venid a comeros los dos" his mom called out. "You can leave your jacket and your bag in here" Miles said, leading the way.

You smiled in delight at the scent of the food, everything smelled and looked amazing. You took a seat next to Miles while his parents sat on the other side. "Help yourself honey, plenty to go around." his mom said as they all began sharing their food. You took a bite and nod her head. "Oh this is really good, Mrs, Morales." you said taking another bite.

"Thank you sweetie, and you can just call me Rio."You nodded your head and continued to eat. "So, how did you and Miles meet?" Mr Morales asked. "Oh on my first day i had bumped into him and he helped me find the principal's office" you told them. "Ahh mi pequeño caballero" Rio said, earning an awkward smile from Miles.

You spent the next thirty or so minutes chatting about their lives and getting to know each other. Miles just sat back and watched you as you talked to his parents. They finished up dinner putting their plates in the sink "I can help you wash up?" you offered. "Ah don't worry sweetie, go hang out with Miles. Mantén esa puerta abierta chico" she told Miles as they went into his room. You sat on his bed moving up against the wall. "Do you wanna watch a movie or something?" he asked. "Yeah, I'm good with anything"

You guys settled on 'Someone Great' on Netflix and got comfortable in his bed, stealing glances at each other. Miles inched his hand closer to yours that was resting on your thigh. He mustered up the courage to intertwine his fingers with yours and rubbed his thumb over your knuckles lightly. You looked at each other with small grins, studying each other's face. "You are really really pretty" he blurted out. "You are too" you said before pressing her lips to his in a heartfelt kiss, eyes falling shut.

He wrapped an arm around you, pulling you closer to deepen the kiss. The movie now disregarded, you found your way onto his lap and wrapped your arms around his neck and he let his hands rest on your cheeks before moving down to your waist. They then trailed down to your thighs lightly rubbing small circles over them.

You pressed your tongue against his lips, wordlessly asking permission. He smiled against your lips before granting you access. He brought his lips down to where your jaw and neck meet pressing a kiss there. His hands moved to your ass, lightly squeezing it. Suddenly they heard a creak of a floorboard just outside his room and you frantically got up off his lap and sat back next to him.

"You two okay?" it was his mom. "Yeah mami we're good." Miles answered, hiding his heavy breathing. When she walked away you both sighed and giggled, his hand finding its way back to your. He looked away, eyes landing on the spider-man mask from earlier that you forgot to put back properly. He sat in thought for a few minutes before speaking up again

"Y/n...Can I tell you something?" he said looking into your eyes. "Yeah what is it? You don't got a secret girlfriend or anything right" you joked. He chuckled shaking his head. "No no. But you have to promise nothing's gonna change. And promise you'll keep this between us.

Your eyebrows furrowed before nodding your head. "I'm...I'm Spider-man" he rushed the words out of his mouth. You giggled before looking at his face looking for signs of kid. "Wait are you serious?" He nodded his head and raised his arm in the direction of the mask. Suddenly a piece of silky web shot out of his wrist and pulled the mask to his hand. Your jaw had dropped in astonishment before looking at the mask and then back at him. "There's no way" you breathed out, amazed. "Does anyone else know? Do your parents know?" you asked, holding the mask and looking at it. He shook his head "Just you and Ganke."

He went on to tell you about how he first got his powers and how he replaced Peter Parker, how his powers worked. And then met a different Peter Parker from another universe and then four more spider people from other universes. And how he had to take down Kingpin to get them back home safely "So there's more? Do you visit them or something?" you asked him. His face twisted into a sad expression

"Nah, there's really no way to, you know." She sympathized with him "Well why would anything change? Miles you literally swing around the city and save people every day, that's so fucking cool and really really generous of you." you reached your hand out to hold his face. "I just can't believe you knew about my spider-man obsession and didn't say anything" you joked.

He laughed laughed before you moved closer to each other and resuming your kiss. Before it could get any further though, Miles pulled back. "Would you um let me take you out? On a real date? Like one without my parents?" he chuckled. "I would love that Miles" you hugged him and gave him a kiss on the cheek.

You'd plan your date for the following weekend at a really nice restaurant in downtown brooklyn. After a few minutes, your mom told you to start heading home, so Jeff gave you a ride, Miles tagging along. "Goodnight Y/n" Miles smiled at you. "Good night, Miles"

[blue-jisungs]

for the ask game !! <3

may I request prompt #1, #16, and #32 for dialogue, and #6, #8, and #31 for action? 🤩

and finally for the member 😭 fuck I need to decide uHM whodoesthisfit-

vernon from svt? :D

mepickingoneofmybiaseshowpredictable-

anyway lmao, I hope you have a lot of fun with this! I think these prompts go rly well together so I'm excited to see what you come up with! love you lots 💗

and finallyyyyyyy

CONGRATS ON 2K OMG!!! That's such an exciting number to reach :D you deserve it sm <3 I'm glad I could be here for it ❤️

small accident

a/n. AAAH FIRST OF ALL THANK YOU SM FOR SUCH KINDS WORDS!!! IM GLAD YOU ARE A PART OF MY SMALL BUT GROWING TUMBLR JOURNEY AS WELL!!!! :') i hope you enjoy what ive written - i have to admit, i got excited for the propmts you requested but then i had a problem how to put it together LMAO also hooray first ask gone!! FEELING GREAT B)

warnings. cursing, blood, mention of punching someone and death (?)

"i swear, my knees will fall off. no, my legs as a whole actually"

vernon smiled softly upon hearing your voice from behind the wall and put down the book he was reading.

"thank you for walking me home, guys but i'll get going. i'm exhausted and sore" your laugh made vernon smile and he stood up, getting ready to greet you.

"understandable. sorry again fot the-" seokmin wanted to apologise but you must have cut him off somehow (probably shaking your head, vernon thought, just like you always do when someone is overreacting in your opinion)

"and thank you for going out with us!" mingyu added.

"yeah! we should do it again soon!" hoshi announced energetically "wait, let me help you with the door..."

"we definitely should. good night, guys!" the door opened and your voice was loud and clear now. vernon saw a glimpse of hosi doing the horanghae pose instead of waving, which caused you in giggling.

you closed the door and faced vernon with a warm smile. he frowned upon noticing how pale you were but ignored it and closed you in a bear hug, placing a soft kiss on top of your head.

"how was the trip?" he hummed, leaning away. you blinked slowly and nodded, letting go just to take off your shoes. your boyfriend turned around and walked up to the teapot, with intention of boiling the water to make you tea.

"i thought i'm gonna die from laughter-" you scoffed, shaking your head. suddenly you felt silent, voice dying in your throat. vernon turned back and his eyes widened upon seeing the blood on your hands.

you frowned and stood in place, completely frozen.

"shit, wait… i’ll patch you up" vernon spoke up, making you snap back to reality "what happened?"

you let him guide you to the sink and wash off the blood while he looked at you concerned. you sighed, shaking your head.

"the wounds must have opened. it was just some scratches so i guess when i was taking off my shoes, they opened" you explained. vernon dried your hands gently with a paper towel and realised that the inner side of your hands were covered in several, small cuts.

"i see. but it doesn't explain how you hot them in the first place, love" he chuckled and placed you on top of the countertop, then moved to grab bandages.

when you didn't answer, vernon looked up at you with a soft smile. and yet, he managed to sound quite threatening:

"who do i need to punch?"

you scoffed and focused on his own hands as he tenderly started putting the bandages on your cuts.

"no one... it was a small accident! mingyu may or may have not tripped and fell onto me... and i fell onto the ground. but it was stupid of me to you know, put my hands in front. so i just fell onto asphalt with my bare hands" you mumbled.

vernon just put his lips into a tight line, nodding his head. the whole day of walking up the mountains and parks was starting to set in as you fought a yawn. but watching him, his concerned and focused face, made your heart skip a bit.

in a blink of an eye he was done with your hands and his own, gentle and big, moved onto your face, cupping it. the action took you aback and certainly washed away the tiredness for a moment.

"what?" you whispered. vernon's chocolate irises scanned your face slowly but carefully.

"i'm just checking if you don't have any other... cuts" he hummed, looking up into your eyes. you grinned, letting out a small scoff.

your eyes fell down to look at his plush, soft lips and...

"you're staring again" vernon spoke up suddenly, making you frown. your face was still trapped between his gentle hands and you swore you could feel yourself heating up from the comment.

"again?" you asked and he hummed, playful smile appearing across his face.

"i could feel your gaze burning through my skull earlier, dumbass" he said and rose his eyebrows "oh?"

you wanted too ask what is it but his thumb gently brushed against the corner of your lips, wiping something.

"i had something there?" you asked, genuinely confused.

vernon leaned in, placing a tender kiss on your lips. blood rushed to your face, still cupped in his hands, and you decided to place your bandaged hands on his arms. you barely managed to kiss him back when he leaned away with a sly smile.

"oh, it was just a small accident" he hummed, taking off his hands from your face to admire the blush that formed on your cheeks (caused by him, of course) "no but for real, your lips just looked empty"

"choi hansol i swear you will be the death of mine" you laughed, shaking your head. he just shrugged nonchalantly and helped you leave the countertop.

"i know. now let's get you to bed, you must be tired" vernon placed another, gentle kiss on your temple.

[ masterlist <3 ]

taglist. @geniejunn ,, @luvhyun3 ,, @starlostseungmin ,, @elviransworld ,, @jnks6r ,, @sieunsgf ,, @lhsng ,, @ethereallino ,, @laylasbunbunny ,, @duolingofanaccount

[definitelynotshouting]

Hello again! Im so sorry to hear you feeling well when i sent in my ask the other day :( hoping that the life series drop tmrw will provide a much needed distraction for whatever you need it to :)

-☀️

"I know the, um, this morning didn't go… very well… but… if I could—""

"Good, he thinks, but it's a rote sentiment, not half so vicious as it had been only hours earlier."

- oh??? 👀 i am looking

- Im assuming this is the meeting they had about taking grian back to hermitcraft (and the revelation that grian feeds on emotions to survive)?? Very curious

- Now that metaphor about the childhood coat being stained is a lot more painful

-☀️

"even stolen energy can't make up for that."

"everything he'd never had the first time he— well, when Grian, the real Grian— had died."

- "stolen energy" omg i am biting ankles over this.

- And the "real Grian" thing. Yeah

- This is one of those moments where grian's whole situation is so much more potent and vivid. Imagining living as myself, but knowing im occupying someone elses body, and having my very lifeforce sustained by others?? Its not hard to understand why grian internalises and hates himself for being "a parasite". Idk thats probably very obvious to everyone else but this is the first time ive really thought about all of what that entails

-☀️

"Starving hands reach out from the depths of his mind to pull him back, stumbling, under that dark waterline."

- Love how the word "starving" implies that G falling asleep is more of a survival mechanism forcing him under so that his body can feed rather than only exhaustion

-☀️

"he's pressed a knife to every promise he's ever made since the day he emerged,"

- shaking you

-☀️

"His existence lies in the shadows of these distorted fractures, jagged hopes and dented dreams, forever fated to cut his hands on the fragments."

- AHHHHJSLDHSJSVSN

- Man 🧍

- Dont have any words. Just tears.

AAAAAAAAAA SUN ANON I ALWAYS LOVE SEEING YOU IN MY INBOX!!!! Gods im so glad these lines resonated with and interested you, they were a ton of fun to write

I have a brain today so i can actually expand on some of the things youve pointed out instead of just aiming heart eyes at you for the compliments fjsndjsjejke so for the first point, yes!!! Scar and Xisuma returned to the others post chap 6 and were like "Well that sucked!! Wow!!!!" I wouldnt say theyve given all the information to everybody, because they themselves aren't exactly ready to discuss that beyond the immediately required basics, but everyone else was given the gist: convo went badly, Grian is being taken back to Hermitcraft on Scar and Xisuma's insistence. Both Scar and Xisuma feel fucking horrible for how that conversation went down-- nobody had a good time there. So while the plan is to eventually get everyone up to speed, they're sorta taking this time to be miserable about what was essentially a fight that ended in stripping Grian of his autonomy

There's also a little cross-communication happening here in the background, btw: Scar and Xisuma have a pretty big picture now, but Tango, Mumbo, and Pearl have been fed that false info abt the potions being potentially useful. So, yknow :) just smth to keep in mind there haha

Your point about how it almost feels like Grian falling asleep is a survival mechanism is spot on the money. It's essentially him falling into a state of low power mode, where everything but his most basic of functions is shut down for a brief time in favour of preserving energy-- i would honestly consider it more equivalent to a coma than actual sleep. Hence Tango's concern, and subsequent relief when Grian woke up; the entire time he was unconscious, he was fully unresponsive. So, yknow. Real nerve-wracking to see, especially after that prior full week of unresponsiveness as his body struggled to maintain itself.

Tango's role here is indeed deliberate, both on a watsonian and doylist level!! The reason however is the exact same for both: Tango is a little more removed, personally, from this situation. Grian was-- and is-- his friend, ofc, but he's not as close to whats happening. Meanwhile, Xisuma is in 24/7 server babysitting mode, Pearl is not fit to be a caretaker, and Scar and Mumbo were tearing themselves apart by trying to sit and look after him. So Tango got assigned caretaker duties 😂😂😂😂 it was an effective way to divvy up tasks and keep everybody busy, and somewhat hilariously, so far Tango is the only person Grian isnt supremely upset with for one reason or another. And thats why he's continued to stay in caretaker mode lol he is truly just. The only guy who can rn

I also just sorta think of him as a surprisingly emotionally savvy fixer-type, in terms of personality. Like. I think he just gets what people set down in front of him, yknow? Although hell if he knows what to do with it once he's got em. He fumbles a lot, sure, and he defaults to fix-it mode, but he is getting the message when Grian essentially says "i dont wanna talk anymore" without actually saying it

As for Grian and his headspace, rn, theres definitely a complexity at work here where he wants to die and is very genuine in that, but he IS also grateful he's seeing his friends. He cant deny that. As painful as it is, he still loves them very much, and ultimately he's trying to do this for their own good as much as for his own sense of punishment and relief. I think like... now that he's really creeping up on what he has planned, and the pieces are suddenly becoming a reality, theres a bit of dissonance he's fighting against to stay on course. He wants his friends happy; he also wants to die. He's so overwhelmingly tired; he is, as much as he feels he doesnt deserve it, glad to have his friends close. That sort of hopelessness mixed with a warped sense of comfort that he got to see and interact with them one last time. If that makes any sense. Its a bit of complexity i wanted to make sure i added in, because people are so rarely fully decided on any course of action they choose to take, without even a single flicker of doubt (and especially one so final as this). Im glad youve picked up on that, and that you appreciate what i was trying to set down with it!!! :D

This was such a lovely message, as always-- you are very sweet, sun anon, and i appreciate you lots :] i hope you're having an excellent day!!!

[youngpettyqueen]

NO GFA ANON I HOPE UR AWAKE CAUSE I FINALLY FINISHED. THE SICKFIC

I no longer have the message in my inbox RIP but here it is at last your requested Hunnihawk sickfic I sincerely hope you enjoy this and im so sorry it took me so long to do

“There,” Hawkeye sits back on the cot, satisfied with the job he’s done of tucking BJ in, “You comfy?” 

“No,” BJ replies, miserable and unhelpful, “But thanks.”

Hawkeye gives his shoulder a sympathetic pat. “Believe me, I’d rather keep you in a comfy post-OP bed,” He tells him, letting his hand linger on his shoulder, “But we’re almost full in there, and Radar said we’re expecting more to come in tomorrow, so you’ll have to make do with the roaches and rats in here.” 

BJ leans back against his pillows, settling a bit more into his cot. “How dare they come and take our beds,” He mutters, “Don’t they know I’m dying?” He asks, with a playfulness to his voice that makes it clear he’s not being serious. 

“How could they?” Hawkeye asks in return, matching BJ’s playful tone, “You’re such a strong, silent type that nobody would ever know you’re sick.” This is, of course, a bold-faced lie. BJ’s been down with this fever for a few days, and he’s been, to put it kindly, a nightmare. Thought with affection. Kind of. 

Doctors always make the worst patients. This is law, a truth universally known and acknowledged. Hawkeye knows he’s a pain in the ass to deal with as a patient, he pities whoever has to deal with him whenever he’s sick or injured enough to need any sort of care. He’s a goddamn nightmare.

BJ still manages to be on a whole different level, though. 

He starts off stubborn. Insisting on carrying on, dodging all attempts to doctor him, that sort of thing. And then, when it catches up to him enough and gets his ass put in bed, he gets sneaky. So far someone- usually Hawkeyes- has had to go and hunt him down and put him back to bed five different times.

It’s only been two days. 

“You sure you don’t need any help?” BJ asks quietly. He brings a hand up, loops it around Hawkeye’s wrist.

“Not from you,” Hawkeye replies. He reaches over with his other hand, places it against BJ’s forehead to check his temperature, “Not until this fever of yours decides to break. You’re so hot I could fry an egg on your forehead right now.” He remarks. 

BJ musters another weak grin. “You’re not so bad yourself.” He rasps. It’s a line that would be much more effective if he didn’t sound like he ate a dirt road for breakfast. 

Hawkeye rolls his eyes. “Real cute,” He deadpans, taking his hand back and folding it in his lap, “I should get back to OR,” He continues with a sigh, “Make sure everything’s ready for tomorrow.” He’s dreading tomorrow. He’s already exhausted, he’s coming off a double shift and he’s looking at another long day tomorrow once the next batch of wounded comes in. That’d be enough on its own, but without BJ…

“Do you have to?” BJ asks, with a look that borders on a pout.

He doesn’t have to, is the thing. He doesn’t even want to. “I should.” He replies. 

“But do you have to?” BJ asks again.

Hawkeye raises a brow at him. “Where are you going with this, Beej?” 

BJ tugs on his wrist. “C’mere.” He says.

Ah. “No,” Hawkeye replies, trying to take his hand back. BJ tightens his grip, “No, you’re a one-man sauna and I want no part of it,” He tugs on his hand a bit more insistently, to no avail. Damn BJ’s stupid strength, “BJ.” 

“Hawkeye.” Stupid fucking smirk on his face.

“Let-“ He doesn’t get to finish that sentence. BJ grabs his arm with his other hand, and yanks. Hawkeye yelps, tumbling over directly on top of BJ, who wraps both arms around him and holds fast.

“Hi.” BJ grins, probably thinking he’s really cute.

Hawkeye scowls up at him. “Release me, villain.”

“No.” BJ’s grin doesn’t so much as falter.

“If you get me sick, I’m killing you,” Hawkeye informs him, “I mean it. I’m killing you with my own two hands. I’m a surgeon, I know how to do that in creative ways.”

“Enlighten me.” BJ invites, making no move to let him go.

“I’ll start by putting swapping your kidneys,” Hawkeye threatens, “And then I’m gonna put your stomach where your heart oughta be. And then I’ll get really creative.”

BJ chuckles, low and warm. “Will you, now.” 

“I have not yet begun to threaten,” Hawkeye proclaims, “Just wait till I get my hands on your spine.” 

“I’m terrified,” BJ says, not looking nor sounding terrified in the slightest, “Quaking in my boots.” 

If looks could kill, Hawkeye would currently be killing BJ with his glare. “I hate you.” He tells him, with no real heat at all.

“Love you, too, sweetheart.” BJ replies, knowing him all too well.

Hawkeye sighs. Long and loud. This is really comfortable, is the thing. BJ is a bit too warm for his liking, but he can suck it up. He’s exhausted. He isn’t actually required to be in OR right now. Getting as much rest as possible before tomorrow is ideal, honestly. He’s got no actual good reason to fight back against this.

“You’re a goddamn pain in my ass.” He tells BJ anyways, the closest he’ll get to admitting defeat. 

“I know.” BJ says, looking way too pleased about it. 

[alexandraswords]

F*CK NORMAL

An overdue ending to a (un)well decorated drinking career.

Introduction

Friday, June 9, 2023 9:28 AM

Today is one of those days where I am just tired, and a bit bored, but mostly tired. I am exhausted. Mentally at least. I have really been putting my all into my sobriety to the point where my day revolves around meetings but im starting to lose momentum. I have a headache, the dog wont stop barking, i'm trying to pop the zits on my face. Basically being alone with my discontented ass self is not something I'm great at... yet.

I should meditate or journal or text another AA member. But I just want to sleep and be normal and relax. But fuck normal.

I thought drinking was normal. I thought my diet of vodka and water and the occasional box of cheez-its was adulting. I thought I was mature and well refined and socially acceptable because I drank, just like everyone else, because, you know, drinking is normal... right?

Wrong. Not for me. I am NOT normal. So I have to do abnormal shit to keep my addictive eating disordered alcoholic riddled ass self sober and happy. I have to keep listening to other people because me making my own decisions landed me in a crack den sharing a room with a friend I would consider a sibling, whom which a fought with constantly to the point where I dragged the mattress from our third floor apartment (if you consider that uninhabitable shit hole, an apartment) down out side below out kitchen window so if I jumped maybe the universe would send me a sign saying that it is or isn't time yet. Okay so I didn't actually do that, but I sure as shit thought about it... a lot. Like a lot. I mean i couldn't even barely walk to the bathroom let alone haul some shit down the stairs. Hell, I wouldn't even walk across the street to get my own liquor. I would bribe my roommate by telling him if he went for me and took my card he could buy something for myself. I just didn't care anymore. I hated everything. I hated that I had to be loaded to be able to walk because my shakes were so bad. I hated that I had to drink to even feel sober and functional and not hallucinate and vomit and dry heave bright green bile. And worst of all I hated that I had lost control.

My eating disorder and my alcoholism made my reality disappear. The food temporarily until my life became a cage, and the nicest word I can think of to name it would be a vomitorium because it was actually that repulsive if you could see inside the walls of it. The alcohol took control over me so I didn't have to deal with food, but also made it so I didn't worry or care about ANYTHING. 

So I guess this is how I'm going to start this ... whatever rant of words form a book. Where I'm at right now. Because right now is all I have. Yes, I am in full self pity mode, but if there's one thing I've learned from AA it's that I need to take action, and never have I ever felt worse after going to a meeting. So,lets go fucking make our bed, and meditate or some shit and get ready for today. So, yeah, Fuck Normal.

So, Why the fuck not?

I got most talkative in fifth grade. The english section of my English SAT’s, I aced. People (my boyfriend) seem to like my writing and have told me If I don’t do something with it, then they’ll publish it themselves… which I’m pretty sure falls into the lines of plagiarism but lets be honest here. I am probably one of the biggest procrastinators when it comes to doing something that is actually good for me. Why? The fuck if I know. Maybe because all I’ve known has been chaos and panic since, like,  forever, that when it comes to the real things, like happiness and joy and pride in work that I’VE DONE… well, I'm just not used to that type of thing.  But I figured, fuck it. I can write a book. All i have to do is elaborate on how awesome I am at self sabotaging and add in some very few lessons I picked up and am still learning day by day. Basically I’ve decided its time to just put all my shit in one bound piece of parchment instead of having to explain my life story to everyone as if its my first day with a new therapist. 

But alas, melodramatic Alex is bored and avoiding meditating, to keep her shit together and be healthier, obviously,  because that would actually be beneficial to my well being. So for now i’ll just throw it in one of the corners in the back of my mind while it slowly simmers into a pot of anxiety attack soup while I try and explain to you (briefly before the pot starts boiling) how fucking insanely delusionally fantastically fucked my life is, and how I got here, and why I wouldn’t change one second of it for anything. But I mean, there’s forwards and shit in books right? So can this be like a PS after the main intro forward? ‘Cause This sober bitch has to go meditate before a meeting so I can stay mindful in my sobriety and not add homicide to my list of criminal activities. (That was a joke) So for now, just for today, Namaste Sober. 

P.P.S- enjoy the buffet of garbage that hopefully is not similar to mine. But if you can and most likely will relate if you’re reading this (most likely because my clever title struck a chord in your twisted little heart) then just know, you're not alone in this shit show, but no one ever really puts the shit show on the ‘gram now do they?

[gb-diesellok]

NEW WORK PREVIEW: THE FIRST SNOW

A memory where I see snow for the first time. Im 3 months old in it.

. . . The daylight had been shortening and more of our passengers were beginning to wear coats. I could see on occasion their breath in the air like my exhaust did. Maybe we weren't so different after all? The days were getting colder. The air felt good in my motors as I breathed it in with my turbochargers. It cooled me down in a way that my water jacket didn't. I felt like I could run forever and I would arrive back at the yard feeling as energetic as ever. Yet the temperatures continued to plummet and I began to feel something different. I felt it myself inside of my motors, inside of my cylinders. It was getting harder to wake up. My oil would be harder to pump and even my fuel began to feel thicker in my fuel lines.

I began to see human staff at the refueling stations and after a full top up, they would give us a dose of a chemical to keep our fuel from gelling in the colder temperatures. Some locomotives were equipped with engine block heaters but I wasn't one of them. The ones like me, without heaters, thought the additive tasted delicious but we could only have it at top ups….which was also bad for me since my tank was so big.

October 10th

I had trouble waking up this morning and for good reason.. the temperatures had been dropping and that made combustion harder with cold cylinders after a long rest. October 10th my systems read as I open my sleepy eyes. My motors sounded horrible as they warmed up.. I kept 'coughing' dark exhaust through the vents on my face's cheeks. I rev to try to get all my cylinders working together.

"Oh, Greaseball!" I hear and I know her voice well. I feel Dinah cup my face in her hands and lean down to kiss me where I still lay on our shed's bed. She was all dolled up and ready to go. "Are ya alright my darlin?" I smile up at her when she brushes my hair out of my face. Normally we woke up together at the same time. Today though…

"Hello sweetheart. Its nice to see you this morning. Did you rest well?" I ran my hand up her thigh, stopping when my fingertips brushed against her skirts. I didn't want to tease her too much, but I wanted her to feel my touch. I squeeze her thigh.

Dinah looked down to my hand and smiled, she blushed and gave me a nod, "I did, love - but you need to get up. It's gettin late! I know we don't go out today on a trip for our passengers but you know how Golden Spike is. He doesn't like tardiness at all! He might give you a break since he likes ya so much."

I saw that Dinah had my sunglasses in her hands and she was wearing a pair herself. We haven't needed those for a good while. Why would we ever need them now? Especially when it was still dark outside at this time of the day? I didn't take them. "Fuck, you're right baby. I need to- hnnnh.." I grunt as I sit up. After a short moment of sitting there, I sleepily stomp to the entrance of my shed with my hand to my forehead. My strength was inconsistent and I held onto the door frame of my shed for some stability. I open the door to looked out, I felt the sting of cold enter my motors. "What's going on!?"

I heard Dinah laugh a little as she walked to me, she tugged on the back of my vest. "Now hold on, you've never seen snow before, Greaseball?"

"No. I... haven't.." I blinked in disbelief at the blanket of white that covered the rail yard. . .

[cassyapper]

OC! TIME!!

<3 thank u to everyone who has encouraged me now u get oc lore tonight rather than tomorrow

so, here's a collection of notes re characters and worldbuilding. some of this is stuff i already had in my head but im ready to share publicly now, and some of this is stuff that is genuinely as new to me as it'll be for yall but im set on it so. here we go

character updates

so i've mentioned arha is a solider*. the truth is arha is originally a soldier for the opposing country to ai/william/adalia's. in fact she and ai et al meet because arha is captured after a battle. arha is snapping at people and fully prepared to be either tortured or killed or sent to an absolutely abysmal prison and she is not looking forward to it so she's hoping for the best of the options (dying) by provoking them. shes honestly exhausting to deal with so she gets relegated to a tent as a makeshift jail for a while LOL. eventually ai comes in as part of her duties and is like "are you ready to be a normal person and go get dinner" and arha is like "what" and ai is like "it's dinner time. i was sent to fetch you. or did you want to see the doctor first." "arent you going to kill me" "why the fuck would we kill you when you surrendered already" oh arha mad af about that line she doesnt like being reminded of surrendering she's so prideful but she's also confused af. she grew up being told that if the enemy caught her she was for sure going to fucking die and be miserable while she did but here therye offering medical attention?? arha does not like being left in the dark so she just complies. to a point. basically she jsut follows ai around and makes her explain things and ai is like so fucking annoyed but arha wont leave her alone no matter how snippy she is or how much she ignores her so she figures answering her questions will get her to leave her alone (at least until they finish this campaign and return to the capital and arha in theory goes to actual jail. of course arha grows on her and vice versa. cause . im weak. theyre gonna be endgame whatever that means)

adalia kills a man revealed: the man is her country's fucking general. th set up: upon return to the capital after aforementioned campaign, another drafting occurs, and since this is common place seeing as they have been at war for 100 years now, no one is really surprised and it doesnt raise super big alarms however the rules have changed while ai adalia and william's troop were out; age of enlistment has been lowered. zoinks! so context for it: when they make it back to the capital, ai and arha return to ai's mother's house. ai's mom is really uspet over arha being there and she and ai get into a big argument about it. ai's mom is like "i just dont understand why you care, her country killed your father and brother" and ai is like "no YOU did when you refused to LOOK FOR THEM" and she storms out. arha of course follows but before she does ai's mom asks her to please look out for ai cause "she obviously chose you. you need to choose her too. you need to. i will never forgive you if you don't." arha is troubled by this but agrees and ai's mom lets them go. they go to adalia's house to spend the night but uh oh Adalia Has Killed A Man. while arha and ai clean her up as her family is gathering supplies for travel packs, adalia manages to shakily explain: when adalia came home, she found the general there and he was drafting her two siblings (twins, aged 12). adalia could not let that happen so in her panic, and in line with her training, she jsut swung a sword at her problems. this kills the man. uh oh! and now adalia has to flee cause like. she can't stay she has committed utmost treason. and the general is Going to be found and if her family tries to hide it they are going to Die and adalia is not gonna let that happen. so she will run. arha and ai go with her of course. and on their way out of the city william finds them cause already, when the general never appeared at the next house he was supposed to draft from, military personnel had been deployed over the city to investigate. william decides to go with them too cause he's just too soft and frankly he doesnt wanna participate in a military that engages use of child soldiers it's not what he signed up for. wow it's almost like both countries have their skeletons and both were employing fucked up tactics against their citizens...anyway. the silver lining is that adalia killing the general did in fact save her siblings form being drafted (for now) cause the houses were chosen at complete random it's kinda like a fucked up lottery thing. since adalia wont let her family cover up her crime and in fact makes them turn her in (just yknow once she's out of the house; theyre gonna be all "oh we woke up in the night and found the general dead and adalia gone") so that officials wont punish them by sending in the twins anyway cause like, as far as the law is concerned they had nothing to do with adalia turning rogue. but this wont keep them from being named in other drafts...but we'll cross that bridge when we get there.

ther's gonna be an underwater arc and ai is . well. ai. (: m'beware the light. n'lol

qiu, due to being raised by dragons ie some of the most blunt species on the planet, just fucking sucks at human social etiquette. he is very forthcoming and his speaking tone is very flat and he does not Do minor facial expressions his face shifts from its resting state only to full-on smile or full-on frown etc. he is very honest in this way but he reads as very blunt and honestly? kinda mean. but he's literally not trying to be he's just standing there. if you know anything about deaf culture he's very similar to that. just no filter or what human hearing etiquette calls a filter. he also gestures in weird ways cause dragons do most of their gestures with wings cause theyre tetrapods and qiu obviously is bipedal. he's got constantly chicken wings going on also t-rex hands

im going to be candid btw arha and ai are based on my read on noritaro. so sorry. it's the only way i could get myself to think about these guys again after three years forgive me

william is 44. when ai's village was raided when he had just officially become a soldier, so he was called in to help reclaim the town and drive off the enemy soldiers. he and ai never actually meet during this because ai and her mom were long gone by the time reinforcements arrived, but he saw firsthand how fucking ravanged the village was and how indescriminate the killing was so when he finds out ai is from there and was a child during that, he just can't help but feel bad honestly. like he's nice in general but that's the reason he gives ai so much leeway. he kinda pities her. she hates him for it a little but eventually it evolves past pity and as such she stops hating him

worldbuilding:

the reason ai at el and arha's countries are at war is cause, okay. country a (ai et al's country) and country b (arha's country) are both world superpowers. there are others beside them but theyre big players in the game so to speak. both are very influential etc. however they're very different: country a is a xenophobic ethnostate that hates magic for religious reasons, and country b is based on a huge metropolis of many intersecting races and such, such as orcs, humans, dwarves, elves, etc. im still adding stuff. and theyre very big on magic. one day 100 years ago kingdom b accuses kingdom a of stealing a very important magical artifact in order to get an edge on them in terms of world superpowerism. kingdom a is very offended that they've been accused of wanting fucking anything to do with magic let alone dealing with kingdom b or lands that have people not of the same ethnicity and they accuse kingdom b right back of making shit up, esp cause kingdom b won't actually describe the artifact or what it does, just so they can use it as a bartering tool for their land (there has been a few land disputes over resources lately). so war breaks out cause neither side is happy and there's already a lot of judgement and irritation going in. so. yikes

magic! speaking of! let's discuss. it's something anyone can learn in this world but some people are more naturally inclined to it. it's a lot like being ambidextrous: some people just know intuitively how to do it and others have to be taught but either way both can do it and both can be very good at it. witches are magic users that had to be taught and wizards are magic users that had a natural affinity for it. witches tend to use wands/staffs as conduits for magic; helps to get from point a to point b. wizards tend to use staffs/wands as well but just to make their spells more powerful. everyone has a sort of magical energy just by being alive in this world. however the amount of magical energy you have in you is finite like ur body isn't just gonna keep making more on its own just like normal energy, and if you drain yourself of your own juice by using too much magical energy you will die! so to replenish the supply (think of it like a health bar) you can do various things that all amount to just, using other lifeforms' magical energy. like, you know how energy from the sun is traced along the food chain. it's like that here. you can like take something's magical energy by eating it, by rubbing it on yourself like sunscreen and absorbing things that way, or inhaling things, etc. just any way you can think of how you get a vitamin, it's similar for how you can take magical energy from things. what your magic is and what it does depends on what you take magical energy from

um yes i believe that's all. i didnt proofread this so sorry. if you actually read all of this i think youre a fuckin saint

[the-nerdler]

I wrote my resignation letter or at least the script of what I'm going to say to my boss when I quit. I just can't do anything until I get something else lined up. I've honestly been in the long process of a drawn out break down and I've finally hit the meltdown point. I've been crying like every other day for almost a month now. I've been so just totally drained. And now,I got totally steam rolled by my boss and manager. They pulled me into the conference room this evening for a "conversation" ad I just got accused and steam rolled for the entirety of the convo. I tried to bring up a few of my complaints, and I was met with a lot of "that's just how the heirarchy is" or "I'm sorry you took it that way but I didn't mean it like that, this is just how I talk to everyone. You know how I am." "I'm sorry you took my constructive criticism that way" just completely dismissing me, not hearing me, and making excuses. And it didn't help that I was crying the whole time bc I'm so emotionally and just everything exhausted and I'm a cry baby naturally. Out loud I said "okay." But inside I said "okay I'm quitting this job." My boss is a fantastic mentor and instructor but in his current state of stress and paranoia he is an awful boss. I felt very overlooked, under appreciated, like my time and my boundaries meant nothing. They hired me and pay me a salaried not hourly wage in order to take advantage of my labor. And I'm not even paid enough to sustain myself and they can't pay me more bc the school isn't doing better. They also essentially indicated or at least it felt like they indicated to me that they were fully ready to replace me with this new girl they've hired. Boss told me "she's a 2nd degree black belt so she can help take on instructing and when I asked her if she has anxiety around making phone calls, she said she has no problem at all." And like I'm not a 2nd degree black belt. I've only been training almost a year. I have phone anxiety it's something I've had since I was a child. They think that she can be who they need me to be. Boss looked me in the eye and told me I needed to step up and I said back to him I've tried in the past and currently to take on more responsibility and get told that I'm doing it wrong. They don't take the time to teach me certain things that I should know how to do and already be handling and then get frustrated when I don't know how to do the thing but bcwere now in a time crunch, there isn't any time to teach me. I've had to change and compromise some very vital aspects about myself to meet the demands of this job and I'm just not that kind of person. I cant function in this hustle culture, boomer pull yourself up by your bootstraps bull shit. Im just not that kind of person. And I just can't do this any more. I'm in full on late stage burnout. It's bad. I'm crying and sick what feels like constantly. I haven't felt this awful in years and if I don't make a change right now, I will fully shut down. And so I'm making a change, I'm looking for a new job, im considering other options. I'm getting the fuck out before I fall apart completely because right now I'm barely keeping all the pieces together and moving.

[seongoftheheart]

The Costa on the Corner of Royal Parade

Woosan drabble (600 words)

---

Wooyoung's watch told him he had eight minutes to get back to his lecture. Wooyoung's brain told him he had eight minutes to get back to his lecture. Wooyoung's friends told him he had eight minutes to get back to his lecture (via an instagram groupchat). Wooyoung's heart told him he had forever.

The line for the Costa on the corner of Royal Parade street was always pretty lengthy whenever he walked past it. Now he was actually here, it seemed even longer. He just wanted his damn mocha, wanted it ever since his best friend Yeosang had informed him that caffienated hot chocolate did in fact exist. Honestly, whoever had invented it needed a big kiss right on the lips.

Wooyoung was at the end of a very long, very arduous and very grueling project that he had been procrastinating for months. Now the end of it was only a couple of days away, he had been cramming and drawing non-stop for it, pushing through about seven different levels of exhaustion and burn out and triggering at least fifteen separate breakdowns. It had been a stressful couple of weeks.

But now it was nearly over, and he was taking a very, very well deserved, not at all problem-avoiding break to go and try a mocha and sit up on the grassy hill of Plymouth Hoe while staring out at the sea and hopefully attracting someone with his mysterious good looks and his mysterious aura and his mysterious coffee alone. It had also been a lonely few weeks (months).

"Hey, how can I help you?" the tired but chirpy lady behind the till asked. Wooyoung woke up from his drifting thoughts and looked at the menu, as if he hadn't been rehearsing what he was going to say for the past twenty minutes.

"Hi, can I have a regular mocha please?" he prayed he was pronouncing it right.

The lady smiled. "And is that to drink in or take away?"

"Uhhh, take away, please."

"Alright, that'll be three pound eighty, please."

Wooyoung's hands shook as he searched his wallet for the coins. He was taking too long, this was so awkward, why didn't he just have the money in his hands ready-

A coin slipped from his sweaty palm and clattered to the floor, skittering a little way away. Immediately flushing bright red and stuttering an apology, Wooyoung bent swiftly, trying to locate the errant pound. Of course the worst had had to happen, he might as well just crawl into a hole and die now.

"Here you go."

Someone else had picked up Wooyoung's money, and was now offering it to him from their palm. He shot up quickly, face burning as his voice shook slightly over the multitude of apologies tumbling from his lips. He grabbed the pound and stared resolutely at the floor, bobbing his head in thanks. The stranger laughed lightly.

"Why are you apologising?" his voice was soft and quiet, with a teasing lilt of laughter to it. Wooyoung glanced up in a brief show of courage. The stranger just had to be pretty too, huh? Cute dimples, soft brown hair carefully styled with a bleached lock curving into his eyes, glasses perched on his nose. Smiling eyes. Fuck.

Wooyoung blinked and turned away quickly, back to the cashier lady who was looking at them with a strange cross of boredom and entertainment on her face. He handed over the money quickly and took his receipt, stepping to the side slightly to wait for his coffee. This only brought him closer to the pretty stranger, who was still looking at him with a smile dancing on his lips. Wooyoung studied the floor.

---

kind of doxxing myself w/ this one??? anyways, i keep forgetting abt this account then coming back to it, its giving me whiplash. hi. im back. hello (´▽｀；)ゞ

this one is based on a true story, actually. im an exhausted art student, who was running horrifically late on a project, and i was out of my mind w/ stress. i did, in fact, try a mocha for the first time (it was gross and nothing like caffienated hot chocolate), and the whole interaction between woo and san actually happened between me and a maccies employee (he was cute but i never saw him again, unlike wooyoung who went and sat on the Hoe (which is a big area of tarmac, grass, and an old war memorial, all overlooking the sea), he drank his mocha and hated it, then San ran into him again and they started talking and Woo got his number and they went on some dates then became boyfriends and lived happily ever after the end).

im also gonna be crossposting my inktober art from my insta and twt over to here too, so look forward to that ig?? lots more of woosan, and seongjoong and yoonmin and changlix and more. thats all for now ig?? see u soon :>

[manic-kagura]

alright so some shit in my life has happened and im just reaching breaking point after breaking point and this post + its possible following reblogs exist to help me vent

general tw, but specific to domestic abuse, narcissistic abuse, and anything that can occur within those two categories (im exhausted i cant think of all the issues that may pop up)

theyll all be under readmores

so for context: my dad has undiagnosed narcissistic personality disorder - while it may be undiagnosed by technicality, i consider this to be his state of being because, like narcs do, he refuses to get help, because THAT would mean something is WRONG WITH HIM!

I’m 27 years old - I didn’t get out of that emotionally abusive household until i was 25, and even then I was unable to fully escape it. in late february of 2020 my dad crossed a line that just...lit the lightbulb in my head and i chose to go live with my current boyfriend, who i had known for about a month and been dating for maybe 2 weeks at the time. it’s been 2 years since i left, and after a long time of slowly getting things in my control (finances, my dog, my car, my bank account, etc) i was finally able to start going low contact 10 months ago. unfortnately, this also meant i couldn’t call my mom because he would turn the volume on the tv down so he could hear me talking to her over the phone. i didnt want to risk her safety further, so we just...dont call each other unless shes in the car.

this specific post is not for me to go into details on the bullshit i endured (i may do that elsewhere another time with heavy tw) - this post is specific to a rather recent set of events and how this has, today, crumbled into causing me a downward spiral.

my dad has threatened my mom with divorce A LOT over the past 2 years - it started getting really aggressive when i caught covid and she was asking him to back off because (SURPRISE) his meddling was making my symptoms worse (and i didnt even live with them...controlling ass freak). so anytime she vaguely annoyed him, he’d threaten it. my mom is very very Christian (unfortunately), and from South Africa - the idea of divorce is terrifying to her on so many levels, and no matter how many times ive tried to get her to leave she always had an excuse.

well, one day he made the threat, and she said “bring the papers and i’ll sign them.”

the threats calmed down. I don’t know when they started getting aggressive again, but in May of this year (2022), he finally decided he’d bring them. he told my mom she had time to look for living arrangements, and when she did he’d start finalizing divorce shit. when i learned this i blocked him everywhere i could manage - no phone calls, no texts. saving face has no purpose anymore when theres nothing to salvage.

my mom has been working her ass off for like 4 years - my dad lost his job, and with it any financial stability we may have had (all the Amazon boxes stacked around the house every day would make you think otherwise though). i learned my mom had NO ACCESS to her income. it went to a joint account that she was unable to get into.

well with this actual divorce going on and her job working her to death (like she goes in at 7 am and leaves at 12 am - fuck publix), she has had literally no way of packing shit up to start getting ready to leave. she has not opened a new bank account for her income. she hasnt found a lawyer. despite me telling her id help her with these things, shes declined and ive backed off.

until today.

on a whim i decided to check my old email (a rarity in the past 2+ years honestly). i noticed some emails in there that were sent as a text, from a phone, which was something i had seen before (my dad had done this somehow by accident before in 2019, but it was always in a text chain that included me).

this one did not include me. i dont know how im receivng these. but its a text chain between him and some woman that i do not know - number and name dont ring any bells, she isnt in our family, shes not a friend ive ever heard him speak of.

he was asking her about “tourism visas” for someone coming from the Phillipines.

its not for work. not only does he not even do shit in the line of work in which hed be talking to people in other countries now, but TOURISM VISAS arent for work.

a good friend of mine from high school has a shitty dad too. we laugh at how fucking similar they are. turns out, her dads had shit like this too! fucking mail order brides!!!

i start sending my mom screenshots. im frantically texting her to contact me. she hadnt contacted me in about a week so in a fit of fear i decide to call her, which is something ive done my best not to do, at all, ever.

i asked her “can you talk? are you alone? can we speak in private?” she said she was at home, to call back in 10 minutes. i told her ok, but she needs to check her texts.

we start texting. she says my dad was asking why i called, what it was about, what i was gonna text her about. she said she didnt know (which is only half a lie tbh).

his response was “when you get home tomorrow, we need to finalize things.”

i ripped him apart in my texts. i told her she needs to get her finances together ASAP. no more waiting. he didnt give a singel solitary shit about her or our fucking family, hes trying to fuck her over. hes hurt us enough. i told her i had screenshotted all of the messages, i told her to ask for a small vacation from work to get her shit together and out, i told her to stay with a friend when my boyfriend and i couldnt be with her to pack.

shes finally decided to get a lawyer. she said to keep everything on hand. shes finally seeing the fucking lightbulb.

im hoping in the next week she’ll be having more days off to deal with this shit. my only high points within this situation today were to see her finally turn around and the mere fucking thought that i made my life long abuser shit himself, all because i said “i need to talk to you in private” to my poor fucking mother.

i hope this fucker burns in whatever hells exist. i hope he burns in every single torturous afterlife and his soul never rests. but most of all i hope he realizes he will leave this fucking world cold and alone, just like he raised and left us.

[jaylver]

RIN LOVE IM SORRY IM LATE I WAS TOO EXHAUSTED YTD AND I FELL ASLEEP BEFORE I COULD READ LOVE AT FIRST SPEED 😭😭😭😭

but now that i've finished reading it...

their first meeting was SO UNSRS like PLEASE HEE WAS SEARCHING HIS SOCKS FOR HIS KEY CARD?,!,' & NOT YN WITNESSING EVERYTHING TOO ☠️☠️☠️ soooo chaotic

the morning after was so cute and completely unexpected for me bc what was yn doing there 🤨🤨 was my first thought i was like noooo wayyy??? this entire scene was so ,!?.!,'@!.!,?.?.!. like hee was down HORRENDOUS already its kinda insane but u go king!!! and then came the NICKNAMES WHAT THE FUCK. URE JOKING OH URE JOKING. r u crazy or am i insane? i ABSOLUTELY LOVED to be able to see how their relationship and dynamics developed <3 not every writer includes that but i really enjoy reading how everything comes into play!!! heeyn's dynamic is so soulmate bff coded sooo comfortable

DONT EVEN GET ME STARTED ON THEIR FIRST DATE. DAWGGGGGGGG IVE BEEN WAITING FOR THISSSS 🤣🤣🤣🤣 they're so freaking cute <33333 and then cue jake being sus 🤨🤨🤨🤨 one of my FAV lines from this fic was when hee told jake "i will, like my heart depends on it" like sir. GOD ME WHENNNNN???!:!: i also love how heeyn's r/s didnt feel rushed? if that makes sense 😭 like yn knew she felt smth for hee but she also knew she wasnt ready yet. with that being said, i also loved how we could tell how equally down bad heeyn were for each other 🤪 like it was not one sided AT ALL. she told him her heart feels full every time she sees him 😭😭😭😭 🤍🤍🤍🤍 albeit drunk... but ☠️

and then the lack of verbal communication for their feelings came through 💔💔😟💔😟💔💔 I WAS LIKE YAAAAAS when they kissed in my head i was like "ohhh yea they r official now" and then boom. 🤯. i totally understand hee bc up until then yn didnt tell him what she really felt about him so he was valid for feeling that way but him choosing to avoid and run away instead of talking to her abt wasnt the wisest choice 😞 im so glad he came to find her to talk to her afterwards 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻 my couple made it 😭🤍

then came the last race.. HEE WONNNN!!!! DESERVEDDDDD 🥇 he fawking kissed her in front of everyone AND ASKED TO BE TGT OFFICIALLY 🥹🫂🤍 MY HEEYNNNNN absolutely INSANE. i was giggling & kicking my feet btw 😭 the last scene. dont even. THEY R SO CUTE UGH BOTH OF THEM SAYING HOW THEYRE SO LUCKY TO HAVE EACH OTHER?:!:&.&/ thats it im out. i cant take this lovey dovey shit no more (i absolutely ate that up)

& in case u couldnt tell i LOVED love at first speed i really enjoyed reading it!!! thank u for sharing it w us 🤍🤍🤍🤍🤍🤍🤍 & i cant wait to see what else u have in store for the series!!!!!!!!

OH MY GOD. THIS. WHATM. THANK YOU THANK YOU FOR THIS LENGTHY FEEDBACK!!!

honestly reading this made my day A LOT. it also reassured me so much because i had a lot of self doubts while writing lafs, so seeing your positive feedback only made me cry tears of joy. love u love u! i'm so happy you loved it a lot! i'll make sure to cook up a good fic for the 2nd installment 🙏

[monchouliz]

Thursday December 7, 2023

Believe me, I was seriously about to write an entry on the 5th but got distracted and didn't realize it was already 3 something or 4 maybe so I just slept it out. I got lazy but I had a valid excuse, I was really tired. I even forgot what happened in these past few days. My head was hurting a lot too, I got soo dizzy often it was kind of frustrating, I even did something so embarrassing because of my dizziness that it made me want to kill myself.

Like I said I don't really remember what exactly happened so I'll just tell you what I remember. No specific dates though. Lol wait, I think I remember now. I scrolled through my gallery and saw the pictures with the dates so... I'll start with tuesday. Nothing really happened except we practiced and I slept inside the dance room, it was cold so it's nice. I thin I actually fell asleep or I was about to drift away when my damned bladder couldn't hold it in so I had to get up from my comfortable position to go piss, even met sir when I was about to go to the bathroom. He asked what we were doing, told him we were sleeping lmao. It was so awkward. Wait... what the fuck. I just had a realization, Ok so I think that didn't happen on Tuesday but instead happened on Monday, because I suddenly looked at my wallet log and realized that theres no classes yesterday so our performance was on Tuesday lmao. Fuck me, Im so sorry. See? I told you my headache was so bad it made me confuse reality. Well So yeah that's what happened on Monday.

Tuesday, it was a big day. I spent a total of 120 that day fuck me. It was a 50/50 situation for me, I was both sad and happy. On the mornings I felt fucking exhausted and I was constantly thinking of depressing things— just like how it is everyday, what the fuck is new. Shaina fucking annoyed me so much too, she won't just leave me alone she was annoying like hell. Of course I wouldn't talk back to her, I don't want to cause a fight ++ It would make me look fucking pathetic because that was only supposed to be a "joke". So yeah we performed the line dance, It was so hot, the sun was angry and glared at us. I felt like I was a marshmallow getting roasted. It was so embarrassing, I was like doing a lot of mistake it was both funny and embarrassing. If I was like on the back I wouldn't really mind but no— I was next to the person in front, basically the second one in line. The girl infront of me was short too, that made my mistakes so much more noticable it made me want to off myself. Well, after that we got ready for the opening. It was funny, I did my makeup there, which is very embarrassing but, I told myself I shouldn't give a fuck about them and did my make up. It was refreshing. We took lots of pictures but that damn bitch still won't send it so annoying. Yeah so I thought I looked fine myself, not that ugly but also not that pretty. Still, at least I looked decent to look at. It was funny performing that, It was sooo hot when we were waiting and then when it was out time, our performance was a mess! Kristina made soo many mistakes, Thank God I was behind someone tall (Not at all I'm so angry, at least let me be seen like wtf I'm being covered.. Fuck Sir jeff, he can fuck off) It was so funny I laughed when performing, she was such a mood booster, yeah I don't think Sir was having fun tho. he was definitely angry, too bad I didn't look at his expression. Well after that we just stayed in the dance room exhausted and laughing. Fast forward, I went to the booth with Tina, Sam and their cheerleader teams. It wasn't fun at all so I had to back out I was feeling out of place, So I hurried back to dance room and found jhamire and Alexis. They asked me if I wanted to join them so I did, I told them to wait a bit because my stomach hurts (I bought a 30php red tea and ran on the way there). And then jhamire told me "tumakbo ka siguro" I replied, "Oo, ang daming lalaki e" I think he said something like "feeling" or something I forgot, then I told him that "Ano? kahit pangit naman nababastos ng mga lalaki ah" and then he replied "Sinabi ko bang pangit ka?" WELL he didn't say it but he was implying like I wasn't even that attractive for guys to hit on me and become assholes because I was ugly. Does he think I'm pretty or what? I don't know, it made me upset. But anyways we went there and Alexis and I had to go back in the dance room because it was so hot and crowded and jhamire was talking with his other friends so.. And then I waited for a moment and went home. By the way I chose to do the long ride, It would take too much time to wait for jeeps so I had to. When I was getting on it was still moving a bit so I fucking slipped, that damned driver. Thank goodness a kind lady grabbed my hands and helped me get on, fuck the driver seriously it was so fucking embarrassing. I bought chicken skin btw, so yummy.

Nothing happened on Wednesday, I literally just chilled and lazed around. Now Thursday, today, I finally cleaned my room. I spent the whole fucking day cleaning it and having mental break downs in between I wanted to like destroy everything in my sight I was so pissed. Gtg, I'm going to piss lol and take a shower I'm like so nasty right now and I smell bad.