#HEY I GUESS IM back-ish.

[jinjofitzo]

my life is on the flip flop. it’s like i made this account to post g/t shit but thne i feel really embarrassed and stupid for positing it… so i post memes and funnies and stuff. But then i feel like im not posting enough g/t stuff so i wanna draw somthing for it . and it’s like. GIRL you think ur an idiot or not?!

[tinybubblesyay]

Cis men be nice and not evil challenge (sudden death) (extreme difficulty)

[kquil]

POLY MARAUDERS | HEROES IN TATTOOS PART 4

04 : DISAPPEAR

SUM. : you find out the truth about the boys' relationship

REQUEST. : this might be a dumb question but are the marauders also all in a poly relationship with each other? if so, i'd love one where the reader finally has that realisation and gets all blushy and starts to consider if they'd ever want to include her —@thepunisherfrankcastle

TAGS. : modern au ; muggle au ; tattoo artist james ; tattoo artist sirius ; piercer remus ; only slight fluff ; mostly angst ; im so sorry ; reader finds out the truth ; but not really in the best way ; major misunderstanding trope ; sirius isn't a bad person! ; poly relationship revealed ; yay? ; distance ; walking away trope-ish ; james is precious ; remus trying to make the hard decisions ; our boys need a hug ; wolfstar ; starchaser ; angst angst angst ; im sorry im sorry im sorry!

LENGTH : 5.2k

← PREV. : 03 | GROCERIES

Hearing James giggling fills your chest with warmth and is so contagious that you have to bite your lip so as not to join him. He sees your resistance and moves his hand, making you freeze up and stop all movement. His index finger curls under your chin to lift your gaze as his thumb settles on your bottom lip and slowly draws it out from the press of your upper teeth. 

“I can’t be the only one laughing, angel,” on his face is an innocent smile but you know he’s devilish — the raging fire he lights up inside you with the smooth delivery of his simple statement is evidence enough that he’s up to no good.

His light grasp offers barely any resistance when you lift your chin away, “that’s because I’m not ticklish like you,” 

“Hey now,” he warns firmly but you can see the mutual playfulness reflecting clearly in his hazel eyes, it was like staring into clear honey, “you’re the one who’s colouring in my tattoo like a toddler,” 

“I was bored,” you defend a little too quickly, getting huffy and exaggerating a pitiful pout. It was… a sight, James admits in his head; you look adorable like this and he wants to frame the image in his memory forever, “and besides, you agreed to it,”

“Yeah, so don’t tease me about being ticklish,” his hand reaches up to play with a strand of your hair before he leans down to press a kiss onto your forehead, where you feel his mischievous smile lift up the corner of his lips, “instead, tell me how much you love to hear my laugh,”

There’s no way you’ll ever admit that. Not to his face, at least…

“Woah, comfy are we?~” came the familiar teasing voice of Sirius, who walks into the room and almost has his eyes bulging out at the sight of you and James, “you lucky bastard, Prongs,” Sirius clicks his tongue but there’s no malice in his eyes or tone, “shirtless, all relaxed and cool, leaning back into the sofa with our doll on your lap and colouring in your tats,” your cheeks heat up under your skin when a shameless expression takes over James’s face and he sends a wink over at his fellow tattooist. 

“I guess I saved the universe in a past life,” James chuckles, receiving an eye roll in return.

“And you, princess,” Sirius whistles playfully and leans down to kiss the crown of your head, “how lucky you are to have such well-sculpted muscles and a handsome face entertaining you,” the heat on your cheeks continue to blossom, “I don’t know who I’m more jealous of,”

That was the first time you were hinted at Sirius’s dichotomy. Between the wink he sends James and the satisfied grin the glasses-wearing brunette returns, you felt a slight shaking in your heart that you couldn’t quite place. 

It didn’t feel bad… but it didn’t feel good either…

After the first homemade lunch you made for them, you’ve gotten into the habit of regularly visiting the boys at the shop with boxed lunches whenever time nears noon. They often insisted that the first surprise lunch was enough thanks. 

“It’s really okay for you not to do this, dove,” Remus voices, slowly trailing off as he leans forward to wipe a stray crumb off the side of James’ mouth with his thumb, only to lick the crumb he wiped off without batting an eye. James pays him no mind either and continues savouring your cooking; he was always the one person who devoured your food as if he was a starved man being fed for the first time.

“But–” you quickly protest, trying to dismiss the small gesture between the two, “but I enjoy cooking for you,” 

“And we’re very grateful,” Sirius smiles warmly at you and takes your hand to press a kiss against your knuckles, “but your company is enough,” ever the flatterer and flirt, you resist the butterflies in your stomach from his gesture and words. 

“And we feel guilty that you have to buy and cook all this food,” Remus adds but you assure them one more time. 

“I promise I’ll stop if it ever gets too hard or burdensome but, for now, please let me do it…” the boys look at each other and smile following a unanimous sigh of defeat. You weren’t aware of the effect your soft pleas and pretty eyes had on them. Of course, they couldn’t say ‘no’ and agreed, satisfied with your pledge for the meantime. 

“Ugh! These cookies are amazing!” James praises, completely oblivious to the interaction you had with Remus and Sirius. He looks up and the three of you have to suppress your laughter at his childish appearance, crumbs surrounding his mouth as his cheeks puffed out from the food he still had to chew. 

“Swallow your food first, James,” Remus reminds, which James quickly does before addressing you again. 

“Can you please teach me?” James leans forward in earnest and you swear there are stars in his eyes, “please teach me how to make them so I can have them all the time. I’m an expert at making fruit tarts now but Moony and Padfoot are sick and tired of me making just fruit tarts,”

You were flattered but…“I want them to stay special though,” you pout softly, “I want to be the only person who bakes them for you,”

Before James could answer, Sirius breaks out into peels of laughter, “you don’t have to worry about that, doll,” he winks at you and side-eyes James with a smirk, “James sucks ass in the kitchen, especially when it comes to baking,” James shouts in protest but is swamped by the laughter shared between you, Remus and Sirius. Nevertheless, you finally agreed to teach him just so he stops pouting… even if he looked cute doing so. 

That Saturday, you were at their apartment, eager to teach James the secrets to your baking creations. Their flat was sizable and still relatively clean, which you verbally praise and are clued into all of their cleaning habits in more detail. It appears that they have a pretty good system going on that keeps things neat; Remus handles the organisation of all items and keeps stock on most things, Sirius proactively keeps all spaces clean and James loves doing laundry. When asked, he said that the main reason was because he liked the smell of clean sheets, which you couldn’t really blame him for. Together, their good habits cumulatively result in a tidy space and you were impressed; not only were they great friends but they functioned well together too. In some ways, you were envious of that. 

When you arrived at the apartment, the boys had all of the ingredients you sent over on a list laid out on their kitchen counters, ready to be put together and baked into your famous cookies. 

“Do you two want to join us?” you ask with a smile as James helped you into Sirius’ apron, tying up the strings behind you. 

“We’re good, darling,” Sirius smiles and offers to tie up your hair as James slips into his apron. You don’t deny his assistance and hand him over your hair tie as Remus observes the scene with a soft smile, leaning against the door frame that leads into the kitchen.

As much as Sirius and Remus disparaged James’ abilities to bake in the kitchen, he, once again, proved them wrong. He did pretty well with following your instructions and getting things done if you discounted the times he got distracted and had to pull you away from the work as well, just to share in the fun. The last time you baked together was a lot of fun and you were just as eager to get back into the kitchen with him in order to experience that joy all over again. Like last time, Sirius and Remus occupied the living room while you and James got to making the cookie dough before eventually baking the cookies. With the timer set, it won’t be too long before you’re happily serving everyone yours and James’ baked cookies with some tea and coffee. 

“It’s just down the hall,” James points out, directing you to their bathroom, “it’s the last door on your right,” with a quick word of thanks, you make your way out to relieve yourself while James gets started on clean up duty. You promised not to be too long so he didn’t have to clean all by himself but he just laughed it off and assured you to take all the time you need — ever the sweetheart. 

Your mood was light and happy and, like all other times you spent with the boys, it felt as if you were walking on air… that is, until you weren’t. From the corner of your eye, when passing the living room doorway, your heart came to a stuttering stop at the scene you happened upon. 

Seated on the sofa was Remus with Sirius’ laid down, his head on the tall brunette’s lap. It would have been a scene you could have easily shrugged off if it weren’t for Remus bending down so that the two could share a loving kiss. One that had Sirius running his fingers through Remus’ light brown hair, who returned the touch by tenderly gripping at Sirius’ thigh with a spare hand. You would have remained frozen there, like some petrified statue, if Sirius didn’t hum pleasantly only to have Remus chuckle against his lips. 

Hurrying to the bathroom, you struggle to get the scene out of your head as your heart breaks over and over again until the stinging pain in your chest dulls into a throbbing ache. 

If they were in a loving relationship then you were happy for them, truly…you were; they always looked so content and at bliss around each other, you felt stupid for not having put the puzzle pieces together yourself. It was just conflicting as to why they never hesitated to establish some sort of distance with you when they already had one another. They were together romantically and yet they were able to press loving kisses against your temple and wrap their arms around you with their loved one standing close by?...

“There you are,” James chuckles when you finally make it back into the kitchen, “I was starting to get worried that you somehow got lost on your way to the bathroom,” it was a weak attempt but you joined his laughter without offering to explain your whereabouts. Turning back to the sink, James returns to washing the dishes as you wordlessly get to wiping down the surfaces. He doesn’t appear to notice your sudden change in mood or, at least, he doesn’t let on that he knows; soon enough, he’s yapping away again, being his usual goofy self and drawing a smile from you. He almost makes you forget. You could always count on James to be your ray of sunshine; a happy bug who was eager to spread his contagious joy. 

Sirius and Remus were a… surprise, although you really should have known better than to not suspect anything. They’re happy though, and you’re happy for them; that’s what matters. 

It was hard to gauge whether or not you should confront them about the revelation you had about their relationship. You had to thoroughly think it over… 

There had to be a reason behind why Remus and Sirius didn’t want to tell you about their relationship and managed to get James in on it too. It must have been a very good reason. So you can’t fault them and resolve to stay silent on the matter. Their privacy needs to be respected; they’ll tell you when they’re ready, you’re sure of it. For now, you just have to act normal, as if nothing happened. The only problem was that you were left to wonder…

Why haven’t they told you? Is it awkward for them? Maybe they didn’t trust you enough? Did they think you were homophobic?— You’re not! You fully support all types of love in all its forms and would never be prejudicial towards them because they preferred the same gender. Or maybe they did trust you but the right time just never came up? That’s also plausible. They probably just need time…yeah! Time, you can give them that; you’re a very patient person, after all—

“—Dove?” 

“H-huh?” you blink rapidly, returning to the present as Remus tilts his head at you curiously. 

“Are you okay?” there’s an amused smirk painted across his lips as he eyes you up and down, “What’s going on in that pretty head of yours?” his warm voice is like a comforting hug on an autumn day, one that makes you want to lose all thoughts and melt into his arms. 

“Y-yeah!” you chirp as embarrassment begins to creep in, “Sorry about that,” he laughs with you, “I guess I got distracted,” Remus nods, understanding in his eyes as he turns to the clock on the office wall.

“The both of us have been at it for a while,” he hums when reading the time, “I think we deserve a break,”

“Snack run?” 

Seeing the delight in your eyes, Remus laughs and presses a kiss to your temple. It takes everything in you not to lean away out of respect for Sirius —you still need to act as normal as possible so you don’t draw attention but it’s getting harder and harder to do so, “snack run,” he confirms, his gaze lingering on your tight-lipped smile. It’s an awkward tilt of your lips and it doesn’t belong on your usually soft and brightly beaming features, Remus thinks to himself. He wants to ruminate on it’s appearance further but files away his thoughts for another day, “let me tidy up here first and I’ll meet you out front,”

Nodding stiffly, you hurry to leave and get to the front of the parlour, where you can safely catch your breath. There, you can recalibrate your thoughts and feelings from a safe distance—

Your gradually slowing thoughts come to a grinding halt as you pass. 

What did you just see?...

Angling yourself carefully and peeking through the crack of the door, you resist the urge to gasp in horror. In an otherwise empty tattoo room, Sirius sits in his tech chair and angles himself upwards as James stands and leans down to meet the former in a sweet kiss. 

Scandalised, you cover your mouth and step away from the door, suppressing a scream as racing thoughts pour into your head. 

SiriusIsCheatingOnRemusWithJames!SiriusIsCheatingOnRemusWithJames!SiriusIsCheatingOnRemusWithJames!SiriusIsCheatingOnRemusWithJames!SiriusIsCheatingOnRemusWithJames!SiriusIsCheatingOnRemusWithJames!SiriusIsCheatingOnRemusWithJames!SiriusIsCheatingOnRemusWithJames!SiriusIsCheatingOnRemusWithJames!SiriusIsCheatingOnRemusWithJames!SiriusIsCheatingOnRemusWithJames!SiriusIsCheatingOnRemusWithJames!

All breath escapes you and the world begins to spin. The charming, loyal and honest character of Sirius that you’ve built up in your head breaks apart and you’re left spiralling at the implications of his betrayal. You feel like crying and vomiting and throwing a rage-filled fit all at the same time! Wait! —No! It’s not about what you want to do it’s about what you need to do and that’s to—

It was then that you hear Remus walking down the steps behind you. Your heart jumps in your chest and your stomach caves in on itself. Leaning forward, you peek through the crack in the open door again and find Sirius carefully prepping his tools for a later appointment while James is against one wall on the other side of the room, checking something on the computer. 

Good… Remus doesn’t have to see anything… you think to yourself, although the thought alone makes your heart break all over again. 

“Ready to go?” Remus asks, approaching you with a lifted brow of curiosity. He’s probably wondering why you haven’t made it to the front of the parlour yet. 

“I-I was just thinking!…uhh,” you bite your lip and try to keep your rising panic from reflecting in your eyes. 

“Hmm?”

“I don’t really want to go on a snack run,”

“Oh?” Remus didn’t even try to hide his surprise, it wasn’t like you to not go on a snack run — so much for wanting to act normal… “How come?”

“I just remembered something-!” it was a lame excuse but you could kill two birds with one stone through this, it’ll be worth it, “-something I wanted to talk to Sirius about—”

“You called?~” speak of the devil and he shall appear. Upon hearing his name, Sirius pulls open the door and flashes his usual charming smile, which only draws a chilling glare from you. Caught off-guard, Sirius blinks in surprise, “What’s the matter, dollface?”

A taunting whistle floats through the air from behind him as James steps up and eyes your unusually angry expression, “what did you do this time, Pads?”

“I-I don’t know…” his normally confident, unwavering voice stutters and is offered cautiously, almost scared despite the tattooist standing a good few inches taller than you. 

Finding some confidence, you square your shoulders and address Remus again but keep your glare focused on Sirius, “Why don’t you and James go on a snack run while I talk to Sirius?” you almost snap out the cheater’s name from spite. You can’t believe you ever deluded yourself into thinking he was a good person that could do no wrong. He’s charmed you, Remus and James, tricked all three of you and you weren’t going to stand for it. 

The two boys jokingly wish their friend ‘good luck’ as they walk past and head out, promising to get his favourites so he can nurse his wounds from the verbal beat-down he was about to receive with something yummy. It’s clear that James and Remus don’t really believe you’re capable of delivering much vengeance or rage but the fire in your eyes tells Sirius otherwise. As soon as the front door closes behind the two, you push Sirius back into the private tattoo room before he could utter a single word. 

“You need to explain yourself, Sirius Orion Black and you need to do it now!” you demand, your voice harsh and biting, something you’ve never done in front of the boys before and catches the traitor, in your eyes, by complete surprise. Sirius doesn’t know what he’s done but he already feels incredible guilt and sorrow over it. He’s never wanted to draw out such a horrid emotion out of you; you’re only allowed to feel happiness and love and comfort. Not this. Never this…

“I-I don’t understand, princess—” he reaches for you but you step away from his touch, your piercing glare and obvious rejection stabbing a knife through his chest. You’ve never pulled away from his reach before, he’s not used to this. What did he do? He would take it all back, whatever he did, if it meant that you would lean into his touch again rather than pull away. He’d do anything to quash the evident flames of rage in your eyes. What did he do?... What did he do goddamnit?! 

“I saw it! I saw everything! You’re playing both of them!” you shout, your rage lashing out and scorching him with their intense heat. There was no holding you back, you told him everything, about how you saw his kiss with Remus and James. His eyes widen in shock before filling with horror, which does nothing but corroborate your heart breaking revelations, “I don’t want to believe it! How could you do this to them, Siri?...” your shouting voice slowly quietens and tapers off at the end, quivering like a shaken autumn leaf. So heartbroken over the fact, your rage quickly turns into sorrow and tears quickly fill your eyes, “You’re better than that, I know you are!” and you really do. No matter how betrayed you feel and having witnessed the evidence first hand, you cling onto the little slither of faith you still had in Sirius, “Please tell them the truth, they deserve the truth… they deserve you being forthcoming with them because they’re good guys,”

Looking on at you, Sirius feels his heart break. This misunderstanding was tearing you up inside and, although it makes him happy to know that you would confront him and be angry for the boys at his supposed betrayal, watching you break down, and sob uncontrollably made Sirius’ heart twist and clench uncomfortably— painfully so. 

Without a word, he reaches out again and is able to bring you into his arms. You don’t return the gesture but you make no effort to push him away either. 

“Shhh Shhh Shhhhhh, darling…” Sirius whispers comfortingly, softly patting your hair as he waits for your sobbing to calm down enough for him to come clean. Scrap the plan, whatever bullshit plan they came up with to slowly ease you into accepting their relationship before selfishly asking for your love as well. He wasn’t going to let you continue misunderstanding their relationship, especially when it’s causing you so much pain, “...this is all a big misunderstanding…” he begins softly once your cries were finally reduced to soft sniffles, “do you know what polyamory is, sweetheart?”

“...n-no…”

“It’s when more than two people agree to be in a loving, romantic relationship with each other, all at the same time,” he explains in the same soft voice, his arms never pulling away from you as he feels you slowly lose your grip on resistance. 

“Is…is that…”

“Yes, that’s the relationship James, Remus and I are all a part of…” he looks down with a gentle smile and watches you peek up at him curiously. Sirius resists the urge to swoop down and pepper your face with kisses. Just when he thought his love for you couldn’t grow any bigger, here you were being the sweetest, most caring and lovable little thing he’s ever laid eyes on. 

However, you slowly begin to shake your head and the resistance in your eyes and expression returns. This time you push him away and keep him at arm's reach. Like a scared prey animal being cornered by a predator, you inch your way back until you're pressing yourself against the wall beside the door. It takes Sirius two steps forward to finally stop and keep his place so that you don’t feel pushed or stressed by his presence. 

“I-I won’t believe you until James and Remus say so…” 

He shrugs and gives you a pained smile. He supposes he can’t blame you for being cautious and not believing him, he’s the apparent ‘cheater’, afterall. 

You watch Sirius part his lips to voice something when you hear the parlour door open and rush into the hallway to see James and Remus walk in. The two were grinning cheekily at each other and their arms were piled high with an assortment of snacks. They held true to their promise; you could spot many of Sirius’ favourites among the pile and it made your stomach twist uncomfortably. 

As soon as the two look up and see your dishevelled form, your eyes pink and tearful, your bottom lip wobbling from restrained cries and your frame closed up like a frightened clam, the snacks are carelessly disregarded and they rush to your side. 

“Dove?” Remus calls, worry evident in his voice as he steals a glance at Sirius over your trembling shoulder. The response he was given — tight lips, drawn into a straight line and unreadable eyes — wasn’t enough, however and his chocolate pools hardened into brown stone. What. Did. You. Do?... Remus silently interrogated the tattooist.

“What happened, angel?” James immediately wraps his arms around you and you almost melt into his hold if it weren’t for your need to clarify everything dominating your thoughts. 

“Are you and Remus in a relationship with Sirius?” your hesitant voice, small and fraying at the edges, speaks up but barely above a whisper. The two men visibly stiffen beside you and you feel a well of tears quickly building up again; your thoughts immediately jumping to the worst possible outcome. 

“Tell her the truth. Give her peace of mind, lads,” Sirius speaks up, his own voice lacking its usual confidence and was reduced to a vulnerable softness. 

“Yes,” Remus affirms after a beat of silence. 

“We’re all consenting, we all love each other, mutually!” James pipes up, his tone bordering on defensive despite not knowing what he’s their relationship defending from, “You…you don’t think of us differently do you?”

“No! No no no! Of course not,” you quickly elucidate your thoughts, your shoulders relaxing as you turn and meet eyes with Sirius, mustering a small smile, “it’s actually quite a relief,”

Grinning softly, Sirius steps up to explain the situation, “Dollface over here thought that I was cheating on you and James with each other, Rem,” he chuckles softly, amusement in his eyes though it still lacked their full brightness, “she gave me a good shouting to and looked like she was ready to bite my head off if I didn’t ‘come clean’ to both of you,” Remus laughs and pulls Sirius into a sideways hug as James coos lovingly at you. 

“You got angry for us, angel?” James presses his face into your hair and nuzzles you affectionately, “you’re the sweetest~” he coos, his smirk growing as he feels an embarrassed heat radiating off your cheeks. 

“St-stop the James,” you whine with an awkward smile and wiggle yourself out of his arms, avoiding his pouting lips because you know your resolve will melt away at the sight. It was confirmed. They were in a relationship, all three of them, with each other. You should be happy that Sirius wasn’t a cheater and still the wonderful man you saw him to be. But, no matter how happy you were for them, the twisting of your stomach and the gaping hole in your heart wasn’t easily fixable. 

The following weeks, you maintained the friendship you had with the boys, who no longer felt the need to limit their intimate touches around you. However, whenever they tried to initiate affection with you, as per usual, once the innocent kiss on the temple and harmless hug was now fervently being rejected by you and pushed away. You had no intention of disrespecting their relationship, even if most acts of affection you exchanged as friends were innocuous. But, then again, it was also your way of protecting your already shattered heart. Yes, you could just stay away from them entirely but you had built such a strong friendship with them that it didn’t feel right to candidly pretend that you’ve never met them before. It’ll do more harm than the harm you were inflicting now…  

Ever the observant man that he was, Remus knew the instant reason behind your hesitation and was quick to reassure you the next time you were invited over for tea. 

“It’s really okay, sweetheart,” the tall brunette hums softly as James and Sirius agree from their own seats, “we’re okay with it and you aren’t going to come in between any of us, I promise you,”

Stubbornly, you shake your head, pulling a deep frown from all of them.

“Are you not comfortable with it?” James asks with uncertainty, his question and its potential implication is filled with enough dread to make even his two lovers stiffen up. 

You nod your head ‘yes’ and they slump in their rejection. It hurt to know that the revelation of their relationship had pushed you away when the basic nature of their affair meant more love for everyone. And they wanted it to include you… Their romance that led to such an abundance of love and promises of more was now paradoxically pushing you away. For once, they didn’t know what to do, not a single one of them could come up with any idea to resolve the ever-growing tension in your relationship. It was a rubber band ready to snap. 

“If you’re uncomfortable then we’ll respect that and keep our distance, touch-wise” Remus surrenders despite the heartbreak it gives him while Sirius shoots up and sends him an irate glare, one that Remus coldly returns. It wasn’t a question of their comfortability but yours, Sirius needed to regard that to the highest degree and Remus was all too ready to make him face the music. They can’t afford to lose you and if it meant that he needed to make the hard decisions then so be it.

“Thank you,”

“...do you not want to be around us anymore?” James speaks up, not necessarily taking things to their extremes but rather potential, future escalations. He’s seen it. In the days and weeks that followed the divulgence of their true relationship, bit by bit you have begun to pull away from them to the point where James can vividly see where the escalation of your behaviour will lead and it’s frightening. One day, you’ll just disappear and that terrifies him. 

“No no…” your weak defence, lacking true resolve, ignites a shock of terrorising fear in all three of them, their eyes shaking with trepidation. But you couldn’t see it because you couldn’t look at them, like a coward. Because that’s what you are — a coward. The heartbreak was chipping away at you. You thought you would be brave enough to see them happy together but you couldn’t. Because, not only were you a coward, but you were selfish too. Green with envy, you stewed in that awful, stomach-twisting, heart-aching, bitter-tasting, gut-wrenching feeling each time you saw every loving kiss, affectionate cuddle and sweetly whispered words. 

Throughout your friendship you grew to love each of them as more than a simple friend. You know it was wrong but they were all so charming in their own, unique way. They treated you sincerely, cared for you without any sinister, ulterior motives and they’ve successfully wormed their way into your life and heart, permanently. 

What was once something that brought you such joy, warmth and feelings of safety was now mercilessly ripping you apart. 

Their dynamic looked different to you now that you were looking through a different lens. They weren’t just close friends anymore, they were very much in love and have been romantically involved for a few years now — it was one of the first things you found out about their relationship. Its longevity was a testament to their unwavering love for each other and here you were, secretly, selfishly and salaciously hoping for your own slice of the love pie.  

How dare you…

Just because you’ve had such bad luck with love didn’t mean you had the right to wish for something that couldn’t possibly become yours. You have no right to ask them for love when they are completely content with their own.  

“Please don’t push us away, dollface,” Sirius begs softly, his steel grey eyes melting into a pool of mercury. Beautiful but poisonous. Something you want but can’t have. 

“I’m sorry,” you’re breathless when you see the genuine fear in their eyes and turn away from the sight. This isn’t the time to turn weak at the knees, “it’s getting pretty late, I should go,” shouldering your bag, you get up and rush to leave their flat. 

“Stay,” Remus half commands and half begs, almost stopping you in your tracks, “please stay… we need to talk to you about something important,” if there was any time for them to reveal the truth, it was now. Before they lose you, before they drown themselves in regret, before they fall into a pit of despair, before they—

“I’m sorry…” you repeat and, just as James feared, you disappear. 

A/N : this took such a long while to write but i wanted it to be perfect, thank you so much for requesting this darling @thepunisherfrankcastle it fit perfectly into the plot although i did make some slight altercations to your request. unfortunately, there's still more to go after this so i'm going to have to leave you darlings with a cliffhanger, look out for part 5! (˵ •̀ ᴗ - ˵ ) ✧

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TAGLIST : @melinajenkins @aastonishment @until-i-found-you @corp0real @sageskisses444 @celestcies @lovelydoveval @inlovewithremusjohnlupin @calums-betch @futurecorps3 @hihihi1112 @simpingforthe80s @yrluvjane @chaosofmanyfandoms @storyofaromance @loving-and-dreaming @somewereinthegalaxi @ashreblogsficshere @cassandra-nerezza-black @stray-bi-kids @ttkttt @notasadgirlipromise @ghostgardn @mess-is-my-aesthetic @susyelectra @fangirlninja67 @pagesfalling @thepunisherfrankcastle @axeofwars @imarimon @in-love-with-4-marauders @chicken-taco-burrito @valencia-rou @feast0nmeee @lestat-whore @hvmxjjk @twilightlover2007 @diaryofabiwoman @woohoney @celestialfantasiess @willbedecided @lovelyygirl8 @iiirhiane-g @mangodamochiii @queerqueenlynn @l3xiluve @brain-has-left @bunbunbl0gs @kneelforloki @citrusiove @virtualbuni @awkward-d3rs3-dr3amer @that1nerd-20 @wolfstar4everbitches @skepvids @dearmy-diary @littledollfacebaby @mylifeisnothing @em16cor @krazyk99 @imdoingbetternow @realalpacorn @remussbitch @swiftieeras1989 @lonely-nerd-sodaholic TAGLIST CLOSED

[myhappylittlesideblog]

See You When You Get Back

Pairing: Daryl Dixon x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Shane's a big jerk in this

Summary: Checking in with those going on a supply run creates some drama within the crew. (Season 1 ish)

A/N: My first Daryl piece! Needed some soft Daryl in my life lol. I haven't finished the show yet, currently in the middle of S.6 and it's been a long time since I watched season 1&2, so sorry for any inaccuracies.

Runs weren’t your thing. Not right now. Maybe in a few months you’d be able to stomach it- going out amidst walkers and even more twisted survivors to find food. And toothpaste. God, you needed toothpaste. But even with the protectors of the group on your side, watching your back, you knew you wouldn’t make it back to camp. Not right now. Maybe someday. 

Everybody was clear on that. The “not right now.” So those going out on the supply run would check in with you, ask if you needed anything special and then leave you be to do their laundry or clean the little dishware you had all collected.

They collected. The ones who could collect things- those going on the runs. You just cleaned. For now. 

“Hey.” It sounded more like a grunt than a word. 

Daryl pulled you from your thoughts. Like a hand dipping into the waves to yank you up into the clear air to breathe. 

“Need anythin'?” He asked once you looked at him. 

You smiled. A lips pressed together - thanks for thinking of me - smile. 

“The usual. Diamonds, meth, whatever you can find.”

He snorted, rolling his eyes. 

“And toothpaste if you can find it. But I let Andrea know that.”

He gave a curt nod. “Kay.” 

“See you when you get back,” you said to him. 

A laughing hiss came from behind you. “Damn, girl, tell 'im how you really feel.”

Shane stood behind you. Snarky. Smirking. Shaking his head. 

Though Rick was the one who found you on his way out of the hospital, it was Shane who let you join the group. At least, that’s how he saw it. You were grateful to him, he protected you, provided for you like he did the others. When you had no place to stay and no tent of your own, he let you share his. It was a generous gesture that was starting to come back to bite you each time Shane acted like he had a say in everything you did. Even more than the others in the group, that is. 

“What?” you said. 

His fingers dug into the belt loops in his jeans as he leaned to one hip. “Everybody else gets a pat on the shoulder or a hug. 'Be safe, keep safe,’” he said, imitating a whiny voice that wasn't quite yours. He shrugged. “Guess she couldn’t care less ‘bout you, Dixon.”

You heard the distinct click and jangle of Daryl putting his crossbow over his shoulder, ready to move out. Your jaw clenched at the thought of him leaving with Shane’s words in his head. 

“Why would you even say somethin' like that?” You shot at Shane. “I would never-“

“Ya don’ haf’ta explain yerself,” Daryl mumbled to you. 

“What was that?” Shane called. 

“I said she doesn’ haf’ta explain herself to you,” Daryl said, taking a step toward you, but angling himself toward Shane. Ready. 

“I think I know her better than you do, Dixon,” Shane said. “We share a goddamn tent-“

“You-“

“If you think,” you interrupted both of them, “that I’d say such a thing about any one of us, then you don’t know me at all. But Daryl’s right. I don’t have to explain anything to you.”

Shane’s eyes went narrow. He crossed the open space between you, the span of two tents, in just a few long strides. You felt Daryl stiffen at your side as Shane stuck his face near yours. 

“You be careful who you align yourself with, (Y/N). If I were you-“

“Yer not.” Daryl said. 

Shane didn’t take his eyes off you. “If I were you, I’d choose better than a redneck with a few arrows.”

Even with his harsh words, his gaze softened toward you. Then he turned away and made his way back to his tent. 

Once he disappeared, you sighed, hoping the tension in your chest would dissipate with the air, but it didn’t. 

“Dick,” Daryl mumbled. 

A dry chuckle left you as you turned to him. His cheeks were pink with anger but his face was calm now. 

“Daryl, when I said- I just meant that-“

“I know what ya mean when ya say it.” His arm snaked around your neck, pulling you into him. Fast, hard, and unexpected. “I’ll see ya when I get back.”

He spoke into your hair. You felt his lips and breath move against your skin. And then he let go, gone as fast as he appeared, and you watched him saunter toward the rest of the group going on the run, his crossbow fit to his back. 

-------------------------------

A/N: A part two may come! I can't just leave you in a tent with Shane after all that, can I?

[ilovemychunkycat]

OH GOD I LIVE FOR AFAB SCARA PLEASE MORE

im so happy you guys are liking my posts 😭🩷

relationship: afab!wanderer x dom!amab reader

tw: fingering, breeding, mommy kink(ish), biting, orgasam denial, overstimulation

You've always pondered about one thing, something that you've been wanting to try ever since you started your relationship with Wanderer.

Could you get him pregnant?

It was a stupid question, sure. He's a puppet, the chances of him being able to reproduce would be nearly impossible.

Nearly impossible. Doesn't hurt to try~

—

Wanderer is spread infront of you, and you thought tonight was the night to ask.

"Wanderer, can I get you pregnant?" He was startled by the question, staring at you wide-eyed.

"Wha-What?! Archons... could've gave me a warning first!" He grumbled, glaring at you.

"Sorry dear, I just couldn't wait for it." You grinned sheepishly, cupping his cheek.

"Whatever, I'm not sure.. but I guess we could try."

"Yay! Thank you love!" You hold him tight, pecking his cheek. Wanderer blushed, squirming in your grip.

"Can we just get to the- OH!" You sunk your teeth into his neck, drawing blood. The metallic taste filling your senses.

"Hey! That's going to leave a mark.." Wanderer grunted, pushing you away. You only grinned, pulling away from his neck.

You pulled down his pants and underwear, "already wet, huh?"

"Well I.. HMM??" You sunk 2 fingers into him, catching him off guard.

"Stop- hhn! Doing things without w-warning!" He huffed, bucking his hips in your grip.

"You seem to like it though~" You cooed, resting your head in the crook of his neck, inhaling his scent.

"Whatever.." He blushed, he hated being called out.

You shoved your fingers especially hard into his prostate, arousing a large moan from him.

"MMGH! [Name]!" He shivered, feeling the coil in his stomach near to snapping, but he didn't have the power to tell you. Releasing a loud whine, he came over your fingers.

"Now, who gave you permission to cum?" You pulled your fingers out, sucking the rest of the juices off.

"M sorry- Can u p-please forgive me..."

"Of course, but only for tonight." You smiled at him, kissing him softly and pulling away.

"Care to help with this?" You gestured at your pants, smirking.

"F–Fine.." He pulled your pants down, your cock slapping his face, having you groan at the sight.

"I would totally ask for a blowjob right now, but I have different plans." You pinned Wanderer down, sinking into him.

"[N-Name!] I can't! To much-" He whined, digging his nails into your back when you hit his cervix.

"Cmon hun, you can take it. Your a good boy, aren't you?" You moved, both of you moaning in unsion.

"Fuck- your tight.." You groaned, speeding up your movements.

"[Name]! Please slow down- I'm gonna-"

"No, not yet. Not til I cum, got it?"

"Y-Yes.." He whimpered, holding you closer.

You slammed into his cunt hard, cumming without warning. The feeling had Wanderer cumming also.

"You gonna be a mommy, holding my child." You whined, moving again.

"[Name]! It hurts...! Please!" His pleas were caught on dead ears as you slammed into him, not planning to stop til you know it will get him pregnant. Orgasam after orgasam came.

"M c–cum—MGGH!! cumming! P-Please!" Wanderer came, clamping down onto you, leading to your orgasam too.

"Haah.. Your gonna be a pretty mommy, all f'me.." You slurred.

You got up to get some rags and water, and when you came back he fell asleep.

You guess you overdid it a little to much?

—

[i-literally-cant-with-this]

thinking about tattoo artist!draken giving me you a tattoo in between and under my your tits im so unwell i want him to suck on my titties so bad HNSKSGDJKHGK okaybye

Hi Mack! Thank you for entrusting me with this awesome ask! I hope you like it! Proofed as much as I could.

WC ::: 2230 (HEY! It was 8 pages and I got it down to 5. So, you're WELCOME!)

C/W ::: MDNI, TattooArtist!Draken x F.reader, unprotected P->V and some other funsies.

You sat in the booth waiting for the artist to come in and start working on you. You'd met him a few times before while going over the finalized print of your design but why hadn't you noticed how sexy he was? He was like some mythological creature.

He walked in backwards and slid the screen all the way to the edge so the small booth was completely shut off from the rest of the shop. "Ok, ready when you are." Draken said as he turned to start getting the ink ready.

"Oh! O-ok, yeah. So, like," you hesitated with your words not wanting to seem like you were too inexperienced. You have tattoos, just not on this part of your body.

"Take your shirt and bra off and lean back and enjoy the ride." He is so fucking cool, you thought.

"Right, enjoy ... enjoy the ride." You began lifting your shirt over your head, watching yourself in the full-length mirror the whole time. Kicking yourself for wearing such a shitty bra (but really what else were you going to do? Wear your best one only for it to get ruined with blood and ink? No. Absolutely not.)

You put your clothes on the extra stool in the corner and wrapped your arms over your chest waiting for his next instructions.

"It's ... heh ... you gonna enjoy the ride or do I have to tat you up while you're standing by the wall? Come on, I'm gentle, I promise.

"Yes! Right right right. Sorry. I'm just a little shy I guess."

I've tattooed much stranger things than tits, trust me. Now sit down."

You moved to sit on the tattoo chair and leaned back. The cool leather made you shiver. Draken placed a paper towel on your chest and told you to relax. He leaned over you to grab the ink and needles. He was so close you could smell him. He smelled like leather, cologne and cigarettes. It made you feel high, breathing him in like that.

He pressed the needle into your skin, making you wince in pain. He pulled away for a second to apply more ink and then went back to work.

After a while, he was about halfway done with the outline. "You doin' ok, y/n? Needa break or anything?" You had zoned out so much that he had to nudge your arm to get your full attention. "Hey! You good?" He laughed.

"Oh shit. Yeah, I guess I just kinda got into a trance. You're very ... rhythmic. It's oddly soothing." You blushed.

"Told you I was good." He beamed. "So you want me to keep going?"

You nodded and put your arms back to your sides where they'd been.

"For this next part, I need you to put your arms above your head. Can you hold them there for a while while I work on the underside of your chest?"

"How long are we talkin' here? 30 minutes? 45?" You couldn't read his face because you didn't know him well enough to. But the look he had was less than comforting.

"Ish? I don't know, honestly. But it's going to be a while. I have a lot of detail to do here. Look, don't ask. Ok? But I can - *aheh* - fuck. I can tie your arms up if this is going to be a problem?" He made a point to look away when he suggested that to you.

And good thing too because the expression that washed over your face would have embarrassed a porn director. You're so proud of yourself for not moaning at the offer.

"YES! Yes. My arms get tired easily. Tie me up, Draken." Your eyes fell to his crotch and the bulge that was presenting itself was nothing short of delicious. You don't know what came over you but you let them roam the length of his chest and met his gaze.

He walked over to a cabinet in the corner and grabbed a few ties. "Which one do you want?" he asked, holding up a few options. You pointed to a soft-looking black one and he tied your arms above the chair. "How's that? Not too tight?"

You shook your head. "No, it's good. Just tight enough." He walked back over to the counter to get the ink and needle ready again. And you know he adjusted his dick. You've seen enough men do that to know what that little dance looks like.

He pressed the needle back into your skin and started on the underside of your tits. He was close enough that you could hear his breath hitch every time he accidentally touched your nipple. And you were certain he was doing it on purpose.

You don't know if it was the drilling of the needle into one of the most sensitive expanses of your body, if it was Draken being so close to you that he could stick his tongue out and flick your nipple with the tip of it. His shallow, labored breathing. His big hands doing such delicate work. But you were getting so fucking wet. And you couldn't help but imagine him sticking his fingers into you. Fucking you with them.

"You're um, doing great. Almost done with this side, are you hot? Do you want some water or something? Want me to crack the window?" he said, breaking the silence.

You nodded, not sure how to respond. "No, I'm uh, I'm doing great, thanks."

He walked over to the window and opened it just a sliver. The air was still warm but it was better than before.

"Thank you." You sighed.

"You're welcome. It's fuckin' hotter than hell in here." He took off his jacket and tossed it over onto your clothes.

You couldn't help but stare at the way his arm muscles flexed as he moved. The tattoos on his right bicep were beautiful and you wanted to trace every inch of them with your tongue.

"SO!" He shouted, startling even himself, he pulled the gun away from you. "Shit. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to say that so loud." His cheeks were burning. You wanted to reach out and smooth your fingers over his face. You wanted to sit on it. But that's just crazy, you thought. Draken continued, much quieter this time, "You got a boyfriend? Or ... or girlfriend. Sorry. I forget about that shit sometimes." He chuckled.

"Nope, no boyfriend. No girlfriend either." You said, looking down at his crotch again. You were so horny you could hardly stand it. "So, just me, my shitty bra, and my soon-to-be tatted tits."

He laughed and leaned over you to start on the other side. He was close enough that his breath was hot on your ear. You closed your eyes and let yourself just enjoy the feeling of his weight pressing against you. You were so close that you could have turned your head and kissed him.

But he beat you to it. He stopped what he was doing, sitting the gun down on the tray next to him and he trailed his fingers up over your belly. Lifting them up long enough to skip over your freshly inked skin and he put them down at your collarbone, skimming them to your chin and tilting your face toward him. You tried to put your arms around his neck but you forgot you were all tied up. Literally.

He smiled at the new light of this situation. "You're tied up." Draken's demeanor changed.

You looked into his eyes, nodding. "Yeah, I guess I am."

"You wanna be free or do you like it?" He said, tracing his fingers up and down your jawline.

"I like it." You blushed. "But I can't touch you. And that's kinda bumming me out." You laughed.

He leaned back, grabbed the scissors from the counter, and cut the ties, but he left them around your wrists. "You wanna touch me, y/n? You wanna play with my hair? My dick?"

You nodded and reached down to his pants. You cupped your hand around his bulge and squeezed it lightly. He moaned and you loved the sound of his voice. "I wanna do so much more than that, Draken. But … am I crazy for wanting this?" You laughed.

"Oh, you're definitely crazy, baby. An' that's just how I like it." He pushed you back against the chair and softly wrapped his lips around your pointed nipple and dragged his tongue over it.

You shifted in the seat and let out a small whimper. "Fuck that feels so good. I don't know if it's because you've been drilling on me all day or if I just really - I really want you, Draken." You pulled on his hair and he moaned again. He moved his hand up your leg and slipped it into your jeans, feeling how wet you were.

"Well, I guess I was right about something today, huh?" He laughed and unbuttoned your pants. He pulled them down just enough so he could get his fingers inside of you. "You wanna fuck me, y/n? Right here in my booth? You gonna let me fill you up - make you cum all over my cock."

You nodded, unable to form words.

He pulled his fingers out of you and unzipped his pants, pulling them down and sitting back on the edge of the table. He stroked himself a few times and looked back at you. "C'mon kitten, need this dick?"

You sat up and straddled him, holding your weight up enough so that he could slide himself into you. You let out a low moan as he filled you up, your pussy clenching around him. "Holy shit, you feel so fucking good," you moaned. Your eyes rolled back in your head and your breath all but stopped it's exchange with the space around you.

He started to move his hips and you rode him, rolling them and bouncing up and down on his cock. You wrapped your arms around his neck and kissed him deeply, feeling him moan into your mouth. His hands were at your waist, guiding you up and down and you felt so fucking good.

"Fuck, y/n, arch your back, stick your tits up, wan' 'em in my mouth." He said, his voice muffled by your chest. You leaned back, he pushed your breasts together and he latched onto them. Massaging them, sucking and biting on your nipples. You felt like you were in a dream, your body humming with pleasure and pain from the abused inches of your skin.

You slowed your movements to feel him better. His cock was hot and dragging against your walls so perfectly that you almost didn't want to cum. You didn't want this to ever stop. You felt his cock twitch inside of you and he moaned, his body tensing up as he came inside of you.

"Fuck, y/n, cum for me, cum all over this dick, baby." He moaned as you ground your hips against his, rubbing your clit against his abdomen. You let yourself go, your body tightening and releasing with the orgasm that washed over you.

You breathed heavily and leaned forward to rest your head on his shoulder. "Wow, Draken. I ... that was..." you trailed off.

He laughed, "It was, huh?"

You nodded, smiling. "Yeah. It was. But I really like your work." 

Your work? You thought. Why did you say that.

"My 'work'? That's what you like? Heh, well, I'm glad?" He chuckled, shaking his head softly. "I'd say the same for you but, I think that'd be weird since I just fucked you and you're still sitting on my dick." He pushed your hair away from your face and kissed you gently on the forehead. "But, you know, I do like your ‘work’, too. It's beautiful. And you're beautiful. And I can't wait to see the finished product." He said, smiling.

You smiled back and leaned in to kiss him again, this time on the lips. "Me too. I'm excited to see it." You blushed and slowly lifted yourself off of him, wincing as he slipped out of you. "God. I hate this part." You pouted.

"Me too, but I think I can make it better. I wanna take you out, y/n. Let me take you out?" He asked, getting up to put his pants back on.

You nodded, smiling. "I'd love that." You grabbed your bra and shirt and held them against your chest as you watched him walk back to the sink and start washing his hands.

"Deal. We should wait a few days after your tattoo has healed up before we go out. Don't wanna get it infected or anything." He laughed, drying his hands on a paper towel.

You laughed too and nodded in agreement. "Sounds good. I guess that gives me time to plan what I'm gonna do next." 

“Do next?” he asked zipping his black jeans and fastening his belt.

“Tattoo ideas … orrr …?” He spun you around by your shoulders and tipped your face up with his fingers.

“Oh, yeah. I’ve got more ideas.” You turned your back to him and he helped you fasten your bra around the wrapping.

“Would you laugh if I said both?” 

“No. I wouldn’t laugh. I’d say ‘when’?”

[woofwof21]

SICK ANNIVERSARIES/CHRIS STURNIOLO

holy shit tumblr moves FAST i literally feel like a godess tysm !! 😽

anyways my tummy huwts so guess what hehe

warnings???: fluff, nicknames ig, use of y/n?

today is you guys' 1 year anniversary and chris had it all planned out.

waking you up with kisses, and strawberries on the bedside table in the morning, just stay in bed together, cuddling till 1pm, baking pizza together in reminders of your first date at that cozy, family run pizza place, taking you out on a nice walk in the park then dinner at a fancy place to spice it up a little and lastly just end the day with a basic horror movie since you both are little scaredy cats that eventually just end up cuddling up close to each other.

but when the plan all goes to shit with you waking up with a throbbing headache the beaming smile spread across chris' cheeks falls in only seconds of hearing that heart melting whimper vibrating through your sleep-puffed lips.

"hey, is something wrong?", he whispers in concern as he places the plate of towered strawberries onto the nightstand to press his palm against your upper forearm and rub his thumb against your shoulder, swayed from left and right.

when you don't reply and just lay there fully still on the mattress with your scrunched up face in pain almost buried into the pillow chris tilts his head, studying your face while he feels his heart breaking for you.

"it's okay! just....just go back to sleep, baby, it's okay!!", he whispers once more before pressing a gentle kiss to your aching temple.

you can't help but let out another whince of pain, your forehead feeling like an abused drum and roll over to bury your head back into your boyfriend's chest.

chris' arm immediately drapes around your shoulders out of simple reflex and he buries his nose into your hair, breathing in your scent to let out a heavy sigh

"im sorry, im so sorry babe..it's okay! im right here, my beautiful, beautiful girl..go back to sleep"

his big hand soothingly rubs the back your right shoulderblade in order to send you back into a (hopefully) healing slumber while he just continues to whisper sweet nothings into your ear.

your eyes slowly squint open, staring up at the white ceiling, your hand reaching out beside you, feeling up the cold, wrinkled up bedsheet where you needed your boyfriend to be.

your groan echoes through his room as the same hand falls onto your forehead, rubbing it in discomfort.

"still not feeling good?"

you slightly jump as chris' caring voice startles your pain fogged brain, causing a soft laugh to slip out of his throat.

he places a bright red mug onto the nightstand, his knees slowly dropping down onto the floor infront of the bed

"heh...sorry ma"

your sleepy eyes follow the dampf float through the air from the mug, not even noticing his warm thumb rubbing circles over your forehead.

"what time is it?", you mumble in a weak, raspy voice once your gaze has finally switched back over to your boyfriend.

"it's like 12....30..ish?", he replies while simply admiring your natural beauty even when your feeling so terrible.

"baby im so sorry you can't enjoy today like you could have. i had everything planned out and ready to go! definitely did not think this was gonna happen....but hey, we can still enjoy today a little hm?"

his caring words make the corners of your lips jerk up into a wide smile once you finally realise what special day it was today.

"oh my god! happy anniversary babe! shit, im SO sorry i messed today up for us!!"

"shhhh.....shut up! don't talk like this is your fault cause it DEFINITELY isn't, got it?"

the stern tone in his yet caring whisper makes your heart melt, your eyes blinking as they fall heavy from the exhaustion of your pain but the smile widens on your lips in love for him.

you feel his hands slide up your sides, under your armpits and lift you up into a sitting position. the mattress damps once he sits his fatass down onto the bedside, besides you.

chris takes the mug in his hand again, holding it up towards your lips while pressing a small pill into your open palm with the other

"drink", he demands with a loving smirk, making you roll my eyes at his drugdealer behaviour, only for your face to scrunch up at the sting in your head that eyeroll caused you

you take the mug in your hands, laying the pill onto your tounge and swallowing it down with the warm black tea with milk, which he knew you favourited over anything.

"you're so beautiful", he blurts out through a heavy sigh along with that adorable smile he could barely hide from you.

chris clears his throat and laughs, trying to try and brush off the words that slipped out of his mouth. your laughter mixing in with his.

already 1 year into the relationship and you guys are still acting like shy teenagers with a little crush.

the pictures match SO WELL at the start my eyes are literally turning into heartshaped waterfalls 😻

aight imma risk it and post at midnight, farewell

[machiten]

thats my seat!

academic rival scaramouche x gn!reader headcanons

warnings: scaramouche(bro is a whole warning), foul language(it's scaramouche we're talking about here so), reader is mentioned to have bad eyesight, fights, angst, academic validation, bad parenting

barely proofread lmao im tired, it's 3:15 am and im starving. there will be a chapter 2 ofc i just wanted to post something goddamn my blog has been empty for so long (4 days) didn't have a way to keep track of the word count but it's kinda long. anyways hope u enjoy!!

oh god

when i say rival, i mean full on brawls on the school hallway

so let's say you've been top of your school since day one. your name has always been at the top of the score board every exam, always class representative, and well known as a smart kid ever since you steped on school premises.

you work hard to keep your grades up, your parents pay enough attention to your succesful brother and none for you

having a successful brother plants high expectations on you. i mean, he did very well, so why cant you? you both have the same blood running through your veins. your parent's praise, that is all you've ever wanted. and yet you're not even informed if there's a family outing, leaving you in your house alone

it has been like that for years

not until one day, you enter into the classroom and someone else is sitting in your chair. someone unfamiliar is sitting on your chair.

"hey, excuse me. i sit there." you pointed at what is supposed to be, your chair. "what, i dont see any names on it." Ok, what. when you finally look up to the culprit, my goodness. Fierce purple eyes that looks like it holds the entire universe, his skin as fair as a maiden, lips plum as a springs fruit, a beauty mark at the underside of his right eye, and his hair a unique color of indigo that is cut in a weird jellyfish-ish hairstyle. while yes, he looks ethereal, not gonna lie (if he had longer hair you might've mistaken him as a girl) his personality certainly does not match his elegance. an annoyed look currently adorned his face, as if you disturbed his peace.

"done checking me out? i know im hot, i get that look everyday so dont ever think you're special." and now it changed into a cocky smirk. the nerve! not only is he sitting on someone else's chair but it seems like his head is getting bigger too. "well excuse me, i havent seen your around school until today so im guessing that you're the transfer student our teacher talked about last week. but do you mind finding a new spot, i sit there." you glared at him.

"no i like it here. here's a better idea, why don't you find a new spot. im the new student here, show some courtesy."

"no- what, go away thats my seat!"

"alright everyone, settle down- oh, i see that the new student is here already," the teacher finally came in the classroom, cup of steaming hot coffee in his hand. Everyone sat down on their seats while you are still standing up waiting for this person to look for another seat. Lmao guess what, he didnt move.

"(name), c'mon sit down. i know getting a new friend is exiting but we have to greet the new student properly. now go find your seat."

"wait but sir--"

"sit down, (name)"

"yeah that's right (name), sit down" a voice beside you spoke. you looked over to the new student adorning a triumphant grin at your loss. and so you are now forced to sit at the back, barely seeing what's in front because of your poor eyesight, and wearing a vengeful spirit.

epic first meeting

the seats in the back are okay, its breezy and you now sit next to xiao (his music taste is so good) but yeah, you cant really see the board clearly so you get notes from mona at the front

at first, it was a one sided rivalry. how hated how rude and bratty he was and at that time, he didnt seem too care (like he get those everyday). but then he started fighting back and oh boy he hasn't had this much fun in years!

the way you retort back to his harsh words is so amusing to him. usually, no one would dare talk to him in a degrading manner but then you came into his life, claiming that he's sitting on your chair, and it was never the same ever again.

now, he looks forward to everyday. he rises up earlier so that he can sit at your chair first, he keeps looking at the classroom door everytime someone enters (in case it's you so that he can give that shit eating grin), he loves how your face gets messed up when he wins an argument, he loves how small your hands are compared to his when you have a brawl in the hallways, and most of all, he loves it when you give him the shit eating grin when you win something (he says he let's you win sometimes because he pitied you, but is it really?)

to him, this is fun, amusing, entertaining. but to you? you've never felt this much hate in a human being, ever.

scaramouche is smart as fuck and he demonstrated that loud and clear

he aced the math test that the teacher gave that wasn't even taught to him

in presentations, he speaks loud and clear and you can really understand the point he's making

he doesn't really like group works (you noticed) but if he was put in a group, he does most of the job flawlessly

sports? oh of course. he's really good at baseball (pitcher). he's also good at other sports but not as good as baseball

oh and pray that you don't get him as your opponent in debates, you will be grilled like a brisket

did i mention he sleeps in like 70% of his classes? it's not like the teachers can do anything about it. he excels in everything, at least let him sleep as a gift

the only times he would be awake is when he pulls on your strings

but of course, you're also good in all of these, that's why you both are rivals

you fight almost everyday for the top spot (and for your original seat) to the point where its a daily routine to everyone else to see you both pinching and arguing in the classroom

He doesn't have any close friends (ahem childeahem) and it's either bc ppl are intimidated by him or he just doesnt give a fuck about friends

maintaining grades is one thing, winning against him is another

you are very intellegent, yes, but you work very hard for your grades every night. losing sleep studying for upcoming quizes and making sure your projects are perfect. unlike him who doesnt even try

you havent seen him study once

and it makes you see yourself lower. you're both equally in par with your grades but thats when he doesn't even try. what happens when he takes everything seriously? what if he studies as hard as you do? where will you stand then?

but when you got 2nd place for the 3rd time this year, he took it too far

"what the hell?! this is the third time!" you looked at the results in the bulletin board expecting to see your name in first place. you studied hard, right? so then why,,,

"oh oops, looks like i did a little too well again this time. aw and i didn't even answer some of the questions because i felt bad for beating you the last two times." a snicker is heard behind you and sure enough, piercing indigo eyes is looking at yours in pure pity. "thanks i guess. are you happy now? that's three times in a row!" aether beside you is now having a deadpan expression, expecting the worst. 'alright here we go again'.

"oh yes very, you know what makes me even happier? your declaration that you're inferior to me. why do you even try anyways, it's clear to everyone that im better. you're just wasting your time burying your head in your books and notes when we both already know who's coming at the top. imagine not meeting your parent's expectations." he's now looking down on you, beating you up with words that you know damn well are true. but that doesn't mean you're not gonna fight back.

"what."

"oh you know, maybe if you tried harder, the cost of your education might be worth it for your parents. honestly, if i we're them id--"

before he could finish his sentence, a loud echoing smack is heard all across the hallway, making everyone's attention turn to the commotion. scaramouche head is now turned the other way, his cheeks beginning to flare from the hit as he glared at the culprit, you. "you motherfucking bitc-!" you tackled him and due to surprise, he fell back. aether is now alert, shouting your name trying to get you to your senses.

you gripped scramouche's collar, rasing his head from the floor and slamming it back down. "you're an asshole, you know that?! i try my best everyday and this is what i get?!!" he fights back, hand on your arm that's trying to get a hold of his hair and another on your neck, holding back your weight.

"you don't know what it's like!! you will never know what it's like being compared to your brother everytime they get a chance!! you dont know what it's like going home to nothing but words of disappointment when you did everything you can to get their approval!! you will never know what it's like for your efforts to go to waste!! you will never know the feeling of being kicked out of your own home and live in a run down apartment!! i work day and night, i lose sleep everyday, i barely have anything for myself to live, and now i have to deal with your ass every single day too?!!"

"(name)! calm down, hey-!"

"fuck off aether!"

every word you spat pricked scaramouche's heart and made him struggle from your assaults. this isn't fun anymore. he knew a bit of your situation, kazuha told him. but he never knew it was this bad. all he knew is about your parent's expectations. he didn't even attempt to fight back this time and just defends himself from your blows. 'shit, i took it too far.'

"you dont have to remind me of my incompetence! i already know, i know damn well i will never be enough!! you're right, why do i even try, right?! you're so fucking annoying, doing everything so effortlessly, like school is a nuisance!! can't i take a fucking break?!!" at this point, you cannot control your tears from falling into his cheeks, rolling down his porcelain skin.

"what are you--?!"

"why can't i be a genius like you?! why dont i have everything that you have?!! i did everything i can, what am i doing wrong?!" you are now saying intangible words that no one can decipher because of the mess of emotions you are feeling at that moment. you're about to deliver another blow when someone held you back.

"(name)! you're doing too much! thats enough!!" goddamn she is stronger than i thought, scaramouche deals with this everyday?? aether pulled you away from the tangled mess that you and scaramouche managed to create. you're struggling his hold but after a bit, you slumped down having no more strength to keep going, sobbing quietly. "...(name)?" aether said.

"...i am so tired of everything, why do i even keep trying. i.. i just want to make my parents proud..." sniffles could be heard from where you are being held my aether's arms. aether supported you from the groud and led you away from the scene and the prying eyes of other students. before you both can disappear completely, aether turned around and gave scaramouche a threatening glare. "i know you both bicker a lot but you took it too far. you are an asshole and you better change that attitude of yours or i will send you home even worse than your condition right now." and you both are gone.

scaramouche is still sitting on the floor, his arm supporting his weight, bruises are forming in his skin while he's craddling his cheek that is now very noticeably red and flaring from the slap you served him earlier. he doesn't know how to act, really. should he apologize? should he just walk away and like nothing happened? should he report you for physical abuse? he didn't know anything.

what he does know though is that he fucked up, big time. he knows that you'll never want to see his face ever again, he knows that nothing will be the same again, and he knows thag the feelings he has will never be reciprocated, after what he's done.

he actually just found out recently, when someone from the other class was making fun of you and he didn't like it one bit, he's the only one allowed to make fun of you, everyone back off. scaramouche can see the crowd dissipating, no longer interested since the main action is gone. he sat there on the floor the whole time, rethinking his life choices, wondering if he said things differently instead of those. would he be seeing you tomorrow? will you still argue with him about nonsensical bullshit? can he still hold your hand whenever you pinch him?

he heard footsteps and before he can look up, someone had smacked him in the head.

"what the fuck-!!"

"i want to say 'are you okay', but to be honest you kinda deserved that." a mop of ginger can bee seen hanging from someone's head.

"fuck off childe, and why did you smack me?!"

"because you deserve it. but y'know, it's nice having front row seats seeing you ruin your life because of that toungue of yours. aether's right you're an ass." he helped scaramouche from the floor, dusting his uniform from the filth. "ill take you to the infirmary." scaramouche can only nod, feeling lethargic after all that energy spent.

he hopes to see you the next day, acting like nothing ever happened.

part 2

[megalony]

Annual Party

This is an Eddie Diaz imagine requested by Anon, I hope you like it. I'm loving all the Dad! Eddie and family Eddie requests coming through and I'm trying to work my way through them all. Enjoy.

Taglist: @lunaticspoem@butlegendsneverdie@langdonzvoid@jennyggggrrr@rogmeddows@radiob-l-a-hblah@rogertaylorsbitontheside@chlobo6@rogertaylors-lipgloss@sj-thefanthefan@omgitsearly@luckytrashgooprebel@scarsout@deaky-with-a-c@killer-queen-ofrhye@bluutac@vousmemanqueez-blog@jonesyaddiction@milanosaurus@httpfandxms@saint-hardy@7-seas-of-fat-bottomed-girls@mrsalwayswritex @rogerina-owns-me  @hellsdragon@im-an-adult-ish@crazylittlethingg@allauraleigh@onceuponadetectivedemigod@ceres27@avyannadawn@noonenuts@sleepylunarwolf@coverupps@justagirlthatlovedtoread @musicistheway

911 Masterlist

Summary: (Y/n) is worried when Eddie invites her and Chris to the summer party to meet the 118 for the first time. But her worries are all for nothing.

Enjoy.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"…Hey, it'll be Eddie's first one."

Eddie paused in the doorway to the gym, letting the towel hang around his neck and catch the droplets of sweat trickling down the side of his face and neck. He had been in the gym for the last half an hour in between callouts but now he wished he hadn't since he had missed out on most of whatever conversation Buck and Chimney were having.

He had been with the 118 for around five months now and it was the quickest that he had ever felt like he fit in with the people he worked with who he could now call his friends. Eddie had never felt so at home with his workmates, not even when he was back in the army. But there were some things that never changed, like Eddie's unease whenever he heard his name being spoken.

It felt like they were unsure about him whenever he heard them mention his name, even just in a passing conversation. Eddie wanted so badly to fit in and feel like this was his family, a safe group of people to work with and get along with and call his friends. He couldn't stop himself from panicking though, little nagging thoughts that he would be the odd one out.

"My first what?" He leaned against the doorframe and looked over at the pair of them.

The way Buck was smiling and how chimney cocked a brow made Eddie relax in himself and manage a smile. Clearly it wasn't anything bad or awkward that they were talking about.

"You sir, are in luck. We were just talking about the annual summer party the station has every year."

"You guys sure do have a lot of parties,"

Removing the towel from around his neck, Eddie threw it in the hamper beside the door before he walked over to them. They had all invited him to a BBQ only a month after he arrived but he had to turn it down, Christopher hadn't been well that week. Buck had been talking about halloween already and how he thought it was mystical and special. Now a summer party was being planned and Eddie knew they were already getting things in motion for Christmas.

Bobby had talked about them always doing a Christmas party and finding a few extra people to cover the shifts so the 118 could go all out and enjoy the festivities.

"That we do, and this year it's my turn to host." Chimney placed a hand on his chest and smiled proudly. He had never hosted one of the station parties before. It was usually Bobby who hosted them or they had the parties here at the station for family and friends to attend.

But a summer party was different, they couldn't have the pinnical of summer inside the station, hidden away from the sun and the sweltering heat.

It was more of an occasion when a party was at someone's house and Chimney had offered to host this one since he hadn't had the chance before.

"You're coming, right?" A smile lit up Buck's face as he tucked his hands into his back pockets. So far everyone had said they were turning up and it looked like it was going to be a big day, they couldn't have a party without the newest member of the team there.

"I guess I could swing by."

"You can bring your family, you know. Parties are for everyone, we're one big family here and that includes you now."

"You have a wife and boy, right?" Buck grinned over at Eddie when he saw the smile start to spread across his face as he looked down at his hands for a moment before he nodded.

"I think they'd love to come along,"

Eddie knew for a fact (Y/n) would be happy to join him at the party, she could see the way he talked about the team and how close he felt to them. She wanted to meet the people who Eddie had grown so fond of and who he spent half his life around now. And he was sure Chris would enjoy a party, he always loved a party whenever someone had a birthday or they went to visit family for Christmas.

This would be a bit different because it would be a new place and new people, it would take Chris a little while to get used to everyone and get to know them. But wherever there was a good atmosphere and a lot of energy, Chris always hyped up and got excited.

"Great! Next Saturday at two o'clock. Cap's already made sure we all have the afternoon off so no excuses."

Looks like Eddie and (Y/n) now had plans for next weekend.

***

"I'm ready," Christopher shuffled into the kitchen and leaned his arms on the kitchen counter next to (Y/n), letting his body fall forward into the counter that kept him upright. His fingers tapped and itched against the counter and he dropped his chin onto (Y/n)'s arm, looking over her to see what she was doing.

"Good, I think I've got everything," (Y/n) leaned down to kiss his forehead as she put the box into Chris's backpack she was getting ready.

She could barely breathe now from the nerves.

All morning (Y/n) had been planning what to take and rethinking how to be ready for any kind of situation or emergency. It felt more like she was going on shift at the fire station rather than out to a festive party to meet the team for the first time.

The backpack was full. (Y/n) had packed Chris's favourite toy monkey, just in case he started to panic and needed something to cuddle. She had his new favourite sensory toy which was a plastic snake that rattled and made a very satisfying clicking sound whenever it was shook.

His noise-cancelling headphones were folded up and packed so if the music or the raised voices got too much, Chris could still stay with everyone and just wear his headphones.

She had a bag of sweets crammed in as well; Eddie had told her that there would be a lot of food and sweets and treats out and they both knew Chris would get upset at that. He was allergic to a lot of things; nuts, milk, latex to name a few and there were only a certain few brands of sweets Chris could tolerate, others he loved but they made him sick.

So (Y/n) thought it was best to bring along a lot of treats so Chris could still enjoy himself. And because he was such a picky eater and had allergies, she had done him a pack up. Save asking Chimney what was in each food and have Chris go into a meltdown when the food didn't taste the same as the brand he always got from the same shop each week. He could always tell the difference.

Then there was his mini-medic kit in the bag too with his EpiPens, painkillers and stomach meds in case he got hold of something he shouldn't and made himself feel sick.

"Come on then, off we go," (Y/n) looped his backpack on her shoulder and hooked her bag on her other shoulder before she reached out to take Chris's hand. His crutches were already in the car from yesterday, he didn't like to use them in the house, only when they went out.

"Daddy?" Chris tilted his head up and leaned his cheek on (Y/n)'s arm as they walked out towards the car.

They had only told Chris yesterday about the party today in case Chris got too overwhelmed or panicked about going or in case he got sick and couldn't go. If he knew in advance, it would be the only thing he would focus on and if for some reason he didn't end up going, he would have a meltdown because of changed or ruined plans. Telling him at the last second was always the easiest way to go.

"He's meeting us there, don't worry," (Y/n) put the bags in the car and lifted Chris up to strap him in his car seat.

Eddie had picked up a shift with Hen at the last minute to cover this morning so the plan was for him to do his shift until dinner time, go wash and change at the station and then Hen would drive them to Chimney's house for the party.

He should be there by now, (Y/n) was praying Eddie was there before she and Chris arrived. She didn't want to walk into a stranger's home and be introduced without Eddie. Chris would be panicked enough and if (Y/n) started to panic too, it wouldn't end well.

Unease washed through (Y/n) in waves when she began to drive. Despite Chris singing and babbling along to the Disney CD in the car, she could feel the panic welling up inside her.

What if Eddie's colleagues didn't like her?

From the way Eddie spoke so highly of everyone he worked with, it would be awful if they didn't like (Y/n). They were practically part of the family now, they worked so closely with Eddie and (Y/n) wanted them to know her and like her and be friends. It would mean she and Eddie could go out with them if they were all close, since they moved here they didn't know many people and the only people Eddie knew well or close were the guys he worked with.

(Y/n) didn't know what Eddie had told them about Chris- or if he had told them anything at all about their son.

It was always a shock when (Y/n) used to introduce her friends to Chris and she could always see their expressions change and their words get stuck in their throat when they realised he had special needs. They didn't know what to say to him or how to act around him.

Some people tried to talk to him as if he was a baby, others ignored him completely and then a few people just tried to ask what was wrong with him and venture into every aspect of their lives.

(Y/n) would hate for Eddie's new colleagues to be like that; they had both lost enough friends back in Texas for how they acted or treated Chris. It would be awful if this new job that Eddie loved and thoroughly enjoyed turned sour if his colleagues didn't take to Chris.

Would they look at (Y/n) differently if they knew she was a stay at home mum and a part-time book editor- which meant she could always work from home and be there for Chris. Would they judge her or laugh at her or think she was silly or lazy?

She didn't have to check the address when she pulled up in the street. The music could be heard from the end of the street and there were at least five cars rammed near the third house on the left. At least she had found the right address and wasn't lost, that was another worry (Y/n) had thought of late last night when she wondered what could and would go wrong. It wasn't very often that (Y/n) got to know and interact with new people and she knew they were all close to her husband. She wanted to be close to them too.

"I think we're here, are you ready?"

"Yep!"

(Y/n) got out and smoothed down the imaginary wrinkles in her dress; it was Eddie's favourite. A strapless white dress with a low cut towards the cleavage, tight at the hips and crinkled and fanned out towards her knees. And it had little strawberries printed all across; the picture of summer.

She had pinned her hair back and matched the outfit with white sandals, whereas Chris had chosen to wear a white pair of shorts and a lime green button up, sleeveless shirt. He even tucked the shirt into his shorts to try and look smart.

(Y/n) looped her bag around her neck and shoulder but when she opened the back door for Chris to hop out, he shook his head. A cheeky grin lit up his face as his eyes creased at the corners and he stretched his arms out towards her while he tilted his head from side to side.

He wanted to be carried.

With a roll of her eyes, (Y/n) held out his backpack towards him, she would carry him but she couldn't hold everything.

He adjusted his backpack on his shoulders and held his arms out, giggly madly when (Y/n) leaned in and picked him up to sit him high on her left hip. He was getting a bit big for her to carry him around, but he was her baby boy and they both knew she could never say no to carrying him around.

Chris nuzzled his face into her cheek and loosely draped his arms around her neck while (Y/n) shut the door with her bum and held him tightly, pinning his crutches underneath her right arm. He would need them when she eventually had to put him down and they both knew he wouldn't sit still for long, he would be snooping and adventuring round soon enough.

"Let's go find daddy," She leaned her cheek on top of Chris's head when he snuggled down against her.

The front door was closed but the back gate at the left side of the house was wide open, connecting the front to the back garden. (Y/n) followed the path and the sound of music round the side of the house towards the voices and the laughter that was drawing them closer.

There were balloons taped to each end of the few tables set out near the fence and there was a BBQ going near the back door.

Quite a lot of people were scattered around the large garden and (Y/n) could see at least three children which made her more relieved than she could comprehend. It would have been awkward if she and Eddie were the only ones to bring their kid along.

"There you are," Eddie's voice was like a Godsend and (Y/n) managed a more relaxed smile when her eyes fell on him and watched him head towards her.

Reaching over, Eddie set down his beer on the table next to Chimney and patted his shoulder before he bypassed him when his eyes set on his girl. They had agreed that (Y/n) would turn up about half two or after so everyone had chance to turn up and be rowdy and catch up before she brought Chris. (Y/n) didn't like being first to parties and Chris would be more settled if everything was in full swing by the time he arrived.

Eddie ran his tongue along his lips and dug his nails into his palms for a second when his eyes latched onto what (Y/n) was wearing. She had done that on purpose.

She had chosen the dress she knew always drove him mad. The one that hugged every curve she had and stopped short of her knees. The dress that looked like summer itself and made everyone's eyes always fall on her whenever she wore it. It was going to prove hard for Eddie to stay away from her when she looked like that.

When he reached them, he curved an arm around Chris's back and moved his other hand to cup the back of (Y/n)'s neck. His thumb brushed up and down her skin, ruffling her hair in the process and causing a shiver to run down her spine.

He loved the radiant smile she gave him when she looked up at him and he just had to kiss those painted red lips that matched the strawberries on her dress.

"Hi," (Y/n) whispered quietly against his lips, grinning at the slight tint of red on Eddie's already pink lips where her lipstick had smudged onto him a little.

"Hey," He kissed her again, biting her lower lip just a pinch before a pair of arms wrapped around his neck and he heard Chris squealing 'daddy' loudly into his ear. Chris eagerly clambered from (Y/n) over to Eddie who lifted him up for a cuddle and pressed a sloppy kiss to his cheek. "I've been waiting for you; God, you can tell you're mine." Eddie grinned and kissed his nose when he looked down at what Chris had decided to wear.

The shorts matched Eddie's light auburn cargo pants and the lime green top looked just like the mint blue t-shirt Eddie had picked for today. If Eddie's hair was slightly more curled, they would be twins.

"Come on, everyone is dying to meet you,"

He swung Chris round before he set him down to his feet and (Y/n) handed over his crutches so he could actually walk for himself for a while.

A tepid smile reached (Y/n)'s eyes when Eddie hooked his arm around her waist and reeled her into his side, where she belonged. She moved her hand up to rest on his chest while his other hand grabbed the handle of Chris's backpack so he didn't stray the wrong way or try and speed off without them.

"(Y/n)," Eddie kissed her temple when they reached the BBQ and glanced his eyes over at a few members of his team. "This is my captain, Bobby and his wife Sargent Athena Grant. And this is Chimney. This is my wife (Y/n) and our boy Christopher."

He let go of Chris's backpack so he could reach over and take back his beer bottle he put down earlier. Eddie could feel himself relaxing already, he could feel the tension melting away when he saw the way the team looked at his family. They didn't frown or look at Chris in pity, they didn't look away or seem unnerved or anxious. Bobby was grinning, Athena had that glint in her narrowed eyes and a wicked smile on her lips and Chimney just looked dazed in a good sort of way.

"Lovely to meet you (Y/n),"

(Y/n) kept her arm curved tight around Eddie's back but happily reached her free hand out to shake Bobby's hand. "And you, Eddie talks very highly of you."

"You know, my son Harry is making some water balloons and I bet he could use some help. What do you think?" Athena looked over at Chris who smiled and lazily tilted his head back until he was looking up at Eddie, silently checking it was alright. And silently making sure both parents would keep an eye on him and not lose him at any point.

"Go ahead," Eddie ruffled his hair as he grinned and walked over to Athena who placed a hand on his shoulder and guided him over to Harry Hen's boy Denny.

Chris loved anything sensory like water or sand or play dough- which was something he always tried to eat. (Y/n) was pleased how sensory Chris was and how relaxed he was with different textures and feels and play toys. Whereas he was sensitive to smells and tastes, it was hard getting him to try new food or watch different movies, visually he was very sensory and didn't like new or different shows or movies.

"Do you want a drink?" Eddie mumbled against (Y/n)'s forehead, smiling and pecking her forehead when she nodded.

She could feel the anxiety bubbling up inside of her when he wandered across the garden to the drinks table. Her eyes flitted between her two boys, smiling shyly when she looked over at Chris. He was sat on the grass, splashing the water and slowly placing the water balloons into the big bowl next to Athena who was introducing and overseeing the job the boys were doing.

"So, what do you do (Y/n)?"

Her gaze fell back on Chimney who started to turn over the burgers on the grill whole Bobby gave him a somewhat disapproving look as he looked between him and the food. Bobby looked at him as if he could do a better job and it made (Y/n) relax, although she wasn't sure why.

"I, I'm a part-time editor for a literacy company so I can work from home and be with Chris,"

"I bet you have to have a good attention span for that,"

"It helps," She smiled up at Bobby, feeling herself relax more and more in their presence.

"Hen's wife works from home, I don't know what she does though, some sort of science shit," Chimney waved the spatula in his hand and shook his head with a smile. He didn't know the specifics of what Rachel did, he just knew she worked from home to be with Denny and she didn't often talk about her work, unless she was drunk. It usually washed over his head.

Maybe her worries had all been for nothing.

Spinning on her heels, (Y/n) held her glass tighter to her chest and smiled shyly up at the man in front of her. She didn't recognise him, Eddie hadn't introduced her to everyone here yet and he had wandered off to check on Chris and see how he was doing.

The man in front of her had a rather cheesy smile, sort of like he was a young boy at heart, a Peter Pan of sorts. He grinned at her and clasped his hands together in front of him, rubbing his knuckles in a way (Y/n) recognised as an anxious movement.

"Hi, I don't think we've been introduced. I'm Evan, but everyone calls me Buck."

"Oh, you're Buck, I've heard a lot about you. I'm (Y/n)," She held her hand out for him to shake, smiling a little wider when his eyes narrowed and his head ticked to the side like he somehow didn't believe she was who she said she was.

"You're Eddie's wife?"

"Yeah,"

"Damn, he never said you were beautiful,"

(Y/n) laughed and brushed her hair behind her ear, unsure how to take that comment. It was either him being very sweet or a jibe that Eddie either didn't talk about her at work or said she was something other than pretty. But (Y/n) chose to take it as a compliment.

"Mummy…" Chris let go of one of his crutches so he could reach up and grab (Y/n)'s hand when he walked up behind her. He started to swing their hands between them, smiling gently but saying nothing when she whispered 'what's up baby'. He leaned his temple against her arm and kept pulling on her hand but it was when he started to hum that (Y/n) got the hint.

She bent down beside him and unzipped the bag he had been carrying around dutifully, unable to set it down because he knew all of his things, especially his meds, were inside.

Rattling around, (Y/n) found the dark purple dinosaur toy wedged down beside his lunch box and held it out in front of him. Watching as he started to nod and coiled it quickly to his chest. He wasn't unhappy but he was getting a little anxious, his favourite teddy would calm him down and give him something to concentrate on and ground him.

"This is daddy's friend Buck, wanna say hi?" (Y/n) kissed his temple as she stood up just as Buck bent down to be level with him.

"Don't tell me that's a dinosaur?"

"You like them?"

"I love them! He's impressive, look at those claws, wow." Buck reached a careful hand out to brush the pale yellow claws before he tilted his head to the side. "Do you want a drink? I saw someone make a milkshake for Denny earlier."

"No milk." Chris shook his head and pressed the toy against his mouth, starting to tap the dino head against his lips a few times as both a sign and a stim for the sensation. It was a panic action at first, it was drilled into Chris what he couldn't drink or have and all he could remember all his allergies, they made sure he knew them if he was ever away from them and uncertain or confused.

But the more he tapped the toy against his lips, the more he started to nod his head and hum. Chris was very sensory, he liked the feel of things like water or fluffy blankets or texture books. And his new stimming technique was tapping toys against his lips for the vibrations and tingling sensations it created.

"Oh, he's allergic to milk but he's preferable to cola,"

"Oh, sorry. I'm sure Chimney has a lot of soda here, why don't we go find some? Can he eat stuff from the barbeque?"

Chris pushed forward and took Buck's hand and reached up to hand him the dino toy so he could look at it. He grinned when Buck placed his hand over his heart before he took the toy from him to inspect and marvel at it. Chris had found a true friend here.

"He won't eat anything new, he's brought a pack up. Drinks other than milk are fine… thank you for this," She whispered the last part, watching them head off towards the drinks table while her heart soared. No one usually bothered to try and understand Chris's interests or get to know him or be around him. People thought he was cute and sweet but didn't know how to act around him.

Everyone here was taking an interest in him and treating him like he was already one of them and had been all his life.

A gasp left her lips and her knees buckled when a pair of strong arms bolted around her waist and reeled her into a hard chest. She tilted her head back and tried to catch a proper breath when she felt Eddie grazing his lips against her neck. His fingers dug lovingly into her hips and he growled into her neck and sent shockwaves coursing through her nerves making her grin.

"I see Buck's found a friend," Eddie let his eyes glance over at Buck who was holding a plastic cup out but letting Chris pour his own drink, something not many people did with him. "Means I can have you to myself for a few minutes."

"Oh really?"

(Y/n) gripped Eddie's wrists and turned her head to kiss the top of his hair but she was finding it hard not to close her eyes and melt against him. And when she felt his teeth grazing and nipping at her skin, she knew there would be a bruise there later that she would have to hide from Chris.

"Hmm."

"Everyone seems lovely, Eddie. I can see why you speak to highly of them," She could understand how attached Eddie was to each of his colleagues and she could see why he felt they were part of a new family together. This was much more than co-workers getting along, this was a close knit family that was hard to break.

She tilted her head to the side when Eddie kissed his way up her neck and over her jaw, pecking and nipping at her skin until he finally had her lower lip pulled tight between his teeth.

(Y/n) couldn't think of anywhere else she'd rather be.

[actualbird]

apropos of nothing, but i suddenly remembered this baffling encounter i had with acupuncture back when i was in college. my mom got acupuncture and it helped her quit smoking (which, yay! whatever works, works!) and then she made me go to try to see if it'd cure a neurological condition i have (which uh, im neither here nor there over alternative medicine and whatnot but in her defense, i had had countless inconclusive diagnostic tests abt this condition so she was very much grasping at straws here for anything that would help me) and since im a good boy who follows what his mother says, i said "okay" and it was a pretty alright experience. i was and am currently still not very squeamish with needles so it didnt bother me very much. if anything, i just took the weekly acupuncture sessions as an hour to nap (with needles in me). but then one day, one of the needles (that went into my abdomen) had a....thingy at the end of it. it looked like a large-ish cork thingy balancing atop of the needle. and i was like "huh, what is that?" but i didnt say it out loud because of my debilitating anxiety and worry and i didnt wanna come off as the weird guy who asks too many questions at the acupuncturist. so i didnt ask. and the acupuncture guy thusly did not explain.

then he set the thingy on fire. and then he left the room.

i dont know about you, but in general i was taught that fires should not be left unattended. that goes for normal fires, but this was a fire lit perilously at the end of a needle sticking out of my abdomen. i guess i was the person attending to the fire, but like, i couldnt move. because of needles in me. it was a harrowing hour. i could not nap. there was an on fire thingy connected to my body. i spent a whole hour laying down alone with my thoughts and also with a small on fire thingy as company.

theres no moral to this story, it's just one of those things that made me go "hey what was that all about" but i never asked because i dont wanna be the weird guy whos not cool with fire needles

[starrybl1ss]

lovegame

spy!ada wong × f!reader

--💄warnings:: fingering, alchohol, smoking, smut generally, mentions of guns, public-ish sex???

--👠summary::

ada and reader sees eachother at a night club. little does reader know, ada was a secret spy on a mission.

(p.s. ada is in her late 30s while reader is 23 i guess)

-------♤

A women with a tight black dress with knee walks in the night club. She approaches the bar tender. "One shot of vodka sir" she said to him. The bar tender nods and gave her a shot of vodka.

Ada sits down infront of the bar and takes out a ciggarete. She slowly smokes whike drinking her vodka.

She's here tonight on a misson. A secret mission. But, one shot of vodka wouldn't cause any harm, right?

"You look sexy today m'lady" the bartender told ada. Ada just glared at him with a dead expression. She doesn't care. As she tries finishing off her vodka and ciggerate, the bar tender wouldn't leave her alone.

He said stuff like "wanna come over sometimes?" "Can i have your number?". While he asks ada about probablly her whole life, she got anoyyed and stood up then walked away.

"Guess she didn't like me" the bar tender mumbled to himself. Ada then walked towards the ladies bathroom trying not to talk to anyone and keeping a low profile.

-------♤

Your a pretty good college student. You work day and night for your assigments. You were serious about getting a good degree. You wanted to make your parents proud and live a succesful and good life.

It's not like you hated the idea of partying and going out, you just prefer staying inside and study. Claire, your bestfriend would make fun of you playfully for being a 'nerd'.

You never went to a night club before, considering your 23 and Claire being around the same age as you is pretty much a party animal since she turned 18. And here you are, in a night club, with claire and few more friends celebrating claire's 24th birthday.

You went here just because its claire. If it wasn't for claire, you would rather not. You can't say no to her! Especially when its her special day. She would go "My birthday, my rules!". You don't find her anoyying cause you always accepted her the way she is.

"Want some wine y/n?" Claire asked you while nudging you arm. "Nah, im good" you replied. "Are you kidding me? Going to a night club with your friends but you don't get drunk together? Come on! Don't be a coward!" Claire teased you.

"Fine. Just one shot. That's it. Kay?" You rolled your eyes. Claire goes to the bar and gets 2 glass of wine.

She went back and gave you one of the glasses. You drank it like a champ. You didn't really like alchohol unlike claire. "Your lipstick's smudged by the way" Jill pointed out. "Ugh, really? I'll be back, gonna go to the bathroom" then you walked away

As you entered the bathroom, you saw a women with short black hair touching up hee make up too. You stood next to her and turned on the fauset so you could clean up the smudge on your face.

"Hey" the women greeted you. You turned off the fauset so you could hear her clearly. "Hey?" You responded. "What's your name?" She asked. You find it funny that you meet a random person in the bathroom and they started asking your name. Shes probablly drunk.

"Y/n" you answered. "Nice too meet you Y/n, the name's ada" she got closer to you. You didn't know how to react. You didn't really get the chance to fix your smudged lipstick too.

You got a closer look at her. She's pretty, you thought to yourself. "You look pretty" she whispered to your ear making you shiver. "Yeah- thanks, you too... ada"

She suddenly puts her hand under your chin making you face her. You startes blushing. You felt really drunk too.

Ada got closer, and closer to your face and started kissing you, making out with you, slipped her tounge in. You couldn't resist.

You let go off the kiss. "Can we go in tbe bathroom stall?" You said while being out of breath. Ada then grabs your hand and you two went inside one of the stalls.

"Keep your mouth shut" she instructed you clearly. You nod aggresively while squinting. Ada then pins you to the door, kissing your neck and biting. You try to keep youd voice in. Shes probably leaving hickeys all over you.

She then lifts up your dress revealing you lacy black panties. "We won't be needing those on" she smirks. Ada pulls down your panties, not off, but to your knees.

She got closer to you. Your bodies touching. She started kissing you again and without you noticing, she slips in two fingers in your wet clit.

"Ada...." you whispered in a hopeless voice. "Shh.... quite". She curls her fingers slowly. You wanted to let it all out. But you cant. You hold on to her hips gripping them harshly. You pulled her skirt up a little bit showing a gun on her thigh.

"A-ada.... why- why, why do you have a g-gun?" You asked almost unconcious. "Don't worry about that sweetie" she insured you. You started to groan. You couldn't hold it anymore.

Ada then stops. "P-pleaaaseeee, please dont stop" you whined. "Well you better shut it. Kay?" You nod.

You heard footsteps outside. "Y/n? You in here?". Ada puts her hand on your mouth to keep you quite. "She's maybe outside getting fresh air claire". Claire and jill exited the bathroom with you and ada being reliefed.

Ada continues giving you pleasure untill you reach your orgasm. You didn't even care anymore that you have hickeys all over you.

☆--

sorry if i wrote stuff incorrectly! anyways, ty for reading! reblogging would really make me happy<3

lotsa love, elora

[kazumist]

EPISODE 7 ★ FUZZY FEELING

FAKE IT TILL WE MAKE IT — A SCARAMOUCHE SMAU

masterpost / prev ep / next ep / timestamps don't matter

scaramouche must have been crazy.

seriously? a date? it was the last thing you expected! however, if you were going to pretend to be a couple, going on dates is actually a given. and like you said in your message to him:

we both have to suck it up.

even if that means having your first date with the guy you hate.

luckily enough, the awkward ride to the aquarium ended faster than you expected. but now that you’re here, how does one enjoy an aquarium date anyway? or what does one even talk about on their first date in general?

these were the questions running through both of your heads as you mindlessly wandered around.

“hey,” scaramouche starts.

“hmm?”

“this fish looks a lot like childe for some reason.”

when you turned to look at what he was looking at, you seriously had to hold back a loud laugh. because why does the fish actually look like childe? “that’s a clownfish, right?” you ask him.

“you know about these things?”

“not really; i just watched finding nemo back then as a kid.”

“oh wait, here’s the description. yeah, it’s a clownfish, and it seems like even their description fits childe even more,” scaramouche says, pointing his head at a podium nearby with his hands inside his pockets.

“clownfish are active and territorial fish with an erratic swimming pattern who sometimes appear to be doing acrobatics while defending the area around their anemone," you read aloud. “see? it fits him perfectly.”

“are you saying childe seems to do acrobatics sometimes?”

“no, i’m saying that he’s way too hyper for his own good.”

“isn’t that supposed to be venti, though?”

“they’re practically the same kind; does it really matter who is who?”

you laugh at his response. 

maybe this isn’t so bad. just maybe.

with the sun almost setting, your little trip to the aquarium ends, and you both decide to stop by a cafe on the way home.

but unfortunately, the awkward tension comes back.

what now? are you supposed to say, “hey, i had fun today,” and just move along? are you supposed to ask, “so how did the date go for you? did you have fun like i did?” you couldn’t find the right words to say, but you couldn’t stand this awkward atmosphere either.

“i… kinda had fun today.”

can this guy read minds or something?

"likewise."

time flew by faster than you expected, and now you were walking out of the cafe with scaramouche. “thanks for today, even though i was kinda against it at first,” you said.

“i hope you realize that we have to do this often if we really want to be convincing.”

“yeah, yeah, i get it. give me a break. who would’ve thought that i would be going on a date with you, of all people?”

“why do you sound so icked by the thought of going out with me?” he rolled his eyes.

“because i am icked by it, smart ass.”

“says the one who equally enjoyed the day like i did?”

“sorry, my pride is too high to make me admit that i actually enjoyed your company.”

he shakes his head at your response. how very… likely of you to say such a thing.

“i guess this is goodbye, then?” scaramouche asks.

“yeah. why? do you not want the day to end?”

“don’t put words into my mouth.”

“you didn’t really deny it, you know.”

“why are you like this?” 

“why shouldn’t i be like this?”

from your peripheral vision, you could see a familiar sight of blue-ish white hair as well as a blonde walking nearby. since they didn’t really know that this wasn’t real, you acted out of impulse. but what did you do exactly?

you kissed scaramouche on the cheek and waved him goodbye, just like that.

extra notes.

i didn't expect this chapter to be so long uhm idk im 50/50 on the narrations bc deadass it was hard 2 write for me ... OTL

theyre kinda getting close! emphasize on kinda though

more silly little romance in the next chapter haha pls stay tuned

synopsis.

what happens when scaramouche, your rival since the first year of highschool, had some annoying admirers on his back? easy—he (fake) dates you to shoo them off. nothing can possibly go wrong with faking a relationship with the guy you hate, right?

spoiler: apparently, a lot can go wrong.

taglist (open): @niiheng @yinyinggie @ilyuu @veekoko @motherscrustytoenailclippings @the-ghost-0f-t0m0 @akairaindrops @kichiyoshi @lxkeeeee @user11918163805279 @sketcheeee @yukiipc @kyouzki @quokkatss @ynverse @yuyumaru @danhenglovebot @sheep-from-rad @gekkow @aeongiies @scararaw @beriiov @thenightsflower @simpforsubmissivemen @sakurapeach @akxtagawaxryxn0sxke @naheana @supernova25 @mitsu-moshi @yelleloww @kiyomi-hoku @kazemiya @theblueblub @lazy-sanns

[quinnkasih]

Kitty Cat

chapter 3 - "the internet cafe's loyal customers"

cat!scara x collegestudent!fem!reader

SYNOPSIS

You are just an ordinary college student, having friends, hard projects and surviving on a low budget. Every week, or saturday to be specific, you would come by your favorite cafe in town, Fatui Cat Cafe. It is such a calming and lively place for you after a busy week as a student. In the cafe, there's one cat that despises everyone, except you.

A/N :

i add a little change to the story. Before, it was Teyvat's Cat Cafe. But I changed it into Fatui's Cat Cafe, due to some stuff. Who knows? Maybe you'll know the story if you match it with the harbingers' actual lore..~

MASTERLIST - previous | next

It was dark outside. All shops were closed, some of the are still open. But only a few. The scenery was lonely. Lonely streets were lighted by street lights that light up during the night time.

Next to Fatui Cat Cafe was a dark alleyway, they throw out their garbage and leftovers there.

It was quiet, too quiet. Until there was the sound of a door opening from the dark alleyway.

There was a male coming outside the door. He looked fishy, wearing a cap and is hooded with a black hoodie and is wearing jeans. He has indigo colored hair.

He was busy fixing his attire. When he was about to leave, he felt a hand on his shoulder.

"Hey comrade! What are you doing outside at such a late time?" Taunted a guy with ginger colored hair.

"Back off, dont call me that. And dont be so stupid, you know what im outside for" Said the hooded man coldly, not bother turning to look at him.

"Hmm? Let me guess..~"

"It's neither you going to the internet cafe you usually go to or the 24 hour convenient store" Guessed the guy.

"What? Who told you about this?" Asked the hooded man furiously, turning to look the other man.

"Ahaha! Dont act all surprised Scara, everyone literally knows you leave the cafe every night. Signora saw you walking out of the door" Explained the ginger man, giggling.

Scara just glared at Childe harshly, not answering.

"So? What brings you here then?" Asked Scara again, hands crossed against his chest.

"Hm? Whats wrong with me being outside? I mean, you are even outside yourself" Childe answered and scoffed.

Scara just answered with a "ok" and started to leave him.

"H-hey!! Wait for me!!" Childe shouted from afar as he ran towards Scara.

...

They stopped by an internet cafe, it was usually crowded. But since it was midnight, of course it isnt.

"Its up to you whether you want to rent or not. Also, Im not paying your bill." Scara exclaimed, opening the door.

"Huh??! What do you mean?? I thought you are paying me?? How do even have money??!" Childe asked, surprised.

"I stole it from the cashier" Scara confessed, not feeling any guilty of doing it.

"Hey! You stole it?! I'll report you to master Tsaritsa!!" Childe warned.

"Pfft why should I care? Go on and report it to her, I really dont care. And also, you sound stupid calling her master Tsaritsa." Scara mentioned as he payed for the billing, 1 hour.

As Scara was heading towards the computer he always used, Childe kept on complaining.

...

"Hufff, what do you even need to rent a computer anyways?" Childe sighed and stretched in his seat.

Scara did not answered anything. He countinued on to type on the keyboard for something. On his screen, showed a search bar. He was searching his own name, his intend was to know his reputation on the internet.

The loading took awhile, but it had finished anyways. He clicked his own hashtag, #scaracat.

The very first post on the top, which is the most popular and recently post, was a video. He hovered the cursor to the play button and clicked.

The video started, it was a video of a girl crouching to a black purple-ish cat, she is stroking the cat slowly. The place was familiar, it was the Fatui Cat Cafe.

After a moment of watching he finally realised its him, in his cat form.

He was surprised. Since when did he started to be gentle to someone? Why is he so calm and enjoying the girls touch in the video?

At the end of the video, he woke up suddenly and bit the girl's hand that was stroking him and the video was cutted off.

"Oohh, thats the video from yesterday's feeding with customers event" Childe commented as he saw the screen.

He remembered again the warmth and affection he received in his sleep yesterday afternoon. He thought it was just him feeling things. Well, it sure isnt him.

He scrolled down to the comments and checked, it was all positive comments.

The comments were just dry, like "aww cute!! 🥰🥰🥰😍" or "aww🥺🥺". He expected to meet a comment or two like, "man wish that was me" or "hey women move‼️‼️ my turn❗" or basically just simp comments. But who would simp for a cat??

He still expects like a comment like so, he countinued to scroll down the comments.

He the came across a comment, saying "the girl in the video is @/y/nn". He clicked the tagged user and the page loaded.

Childe on the other hand who was watching the same thing as Scara, is very interested in this girl.

@/y/nn is actually just a normal typical girl who does dance videos or vlogged her day with her friends, nothing special.

Her latest video has many views than her usually views on other videos, maybe because she recently got famous due to being one of the persons to calm him.

The video that got most views was a video of her dancing the newest trend, Casey dance. She isnt like most girls that really showed off their curves with the dance, she still kept her image well and kept her curves covered with baggy and oversized clothing despite the slight explicit dance.

(For those of you who dont know the dance, here's the video)

"Mannn, y/n is pretty~" Teased Childe beside Scara.

Scara only kept on looking on the screen with a slight blush on his cheeks. His cat ears which are hidden and blocked by his cap and hood were twitching to rise up, a sign of him being flustered. His tail was also itching to wag a little.

Childe only looked at him with a smug smile plastered on his face.

...

Eventually their rent time for the computer has ended so they left.

Childe insisted on buying some snack or stuff at the 24 hour convenient store with some money he found on the computer desk he was sitting on, Scara agreed.

TAGLIST

@dee-zbignuts @cr4ftingtable @lxry-chxn @cherricoladrink @scrmgf @ember-is-clueless @butterandbeans @lilias-spouse @wisteriaflowersss @sukunasin @nemesis1ofdark @crinklypink @louise-rosita-leroux @thetwinkims @koi-chairowo @grimreapersscythe @eimuros @kaoyamamegami @meowlumi @crazypriestess @g0re-h0und @ssilentblackyt @blurr3db3rry @blvdmrcnry @toriiee @lycheemouse @valiryyz @nejibot @pheebbbs @lovely-scaramouchie

[eirian]

yall ready for a gender journey post..

so yall could probably guess i grew up a cis girl. i didnt start questioning my gender until high school after i broke up with my first boyfriend which kind of freed me up to explore my identity as my own person for the first time. around age like 16 was when i first started identifying as trans, and at the time that meant a binary trans guy

after a couple years of getting comfortable exploring my gender i decided hey maybe im actually not a binary trans guy but instead nonbinary. still transmasc and guy leaning but not quite all the way anymore. this became a trend for the next loooong while, getting closer to the androgynous part of the spectrum as time went on

then in recent years (maybe about 5 years ago ish) i started to lean more towards femininity. this is significant for me because growing up i was always opposed to it--i hated wearing dresses, i hated putting on makeup, anything "girly" appalled me and i didnt know why. i ended up thinking its because i WASNT a girl, and thats why i was so uncomfortable with everything to do with being a girl. i rejected it so hard because it just wasnt me.

after living with eden for a while i got even more comfortable exploring the feminine part of myself. i started wearing dresses and skirts and actually ENJOYED it; i started painting my nails and wearing earrings again; i even grew my hair out to my shoulderblades (yeah thats where its at now LOL). ive even started using she/her alongside they/them. and im actually enjoying these things??? it feels like after all these years im finally able to reclaim them because i feel like im finally able to be comfortable with my gender--how my gender feels to ME, not to everyone else.

that was the problem when i was growing up--i was trapped in everyone else's perception of my gender and what it "should" be. i was trapped into a box that was made by everyone else's idea of what i SHOULD look like, what i SHOULD wear, what i SHOULD act like, etc. and it took me until age 26 to fully realize that my gender is what i want it to be, not what everyone else wants.

i dont have to be a guy to want facial hair and a flat chest and a low voice. loving pink and dresses and cute things and makeup and jewelry doesnt inherently mean im a girl. pronouns, features, clothes, even names dont inherently mean youre one gender or another. your gender is defined by you and only you and nobody should be able to put you into a box and define your gender for you.

..having said all this, im starting to explore my gender further, and im slowly coming to the POSSIBLE conclusion that i might come back around to being cis (albeit gnc). nothing would really change about me except the label tbh. if i do end up coming to that conclusion i will be very bummed about leaving the trans community, but i wont feel any less attached to it, as ive spent literally half my life as part of it. i understand what its like to be trans and to love myself as my most authentic self, and thats why im considering this possiblity!

identifying as a lesbian kind of pushed me in this direction as well--i cant remember the last time i felt truly comfortable and happy with a label regarding my orientation.. like ya damn. maybe i am a girl who likes girls LOL. it just feels right and natural for me personally??? its crazy. i love women. if youre a woman i love you no matter the flavor. i love my wife more than all of you though sorry <3

but god please dont take this as me being like "oh trans people just need to get comfortable with their gender and theyll realize theyre cis" that is a bullshit take and i am not saying that. this is strictly my own experience and journey! i am 100% not speaking for every trans person and you shouldnt either.

but ya. dan cis era???? we'll see. no official statement just yet but i just wanted to let yall know where im at in my ~gender journey~. until i confirm anything please still view me as a nonbinary girlthing! <3

[kumezyzo]

yea idk. this is the q&a metioned in this post. 1.5k words... and its all bf!sapnap 😁😁

the spaces between questions are supposed to indicate that a little time has passed, like a cut that would be in a video.

shout out to 🐬 anon for helping me with some of the questions! theyre absolutely amazing 💜💜

anyway, enjoy! or dont.... :) m.list

you and nick sat infront of your desk, both of you going through your phones, making sure you have the questions you both picked out from the responses on your tweet.

you put your phone down and set up your recording. nick reached over, keeping his eyes on his phone, placing his hand on your thigh. it was almost like second nature for him to then start rubbing his hand up and down your thigh.

you pause for a moment, your camera recording. you looked at the moniter that showed you what your camera was seeing. at the very bottom, nicks hand was clearly in your lap, moving slowly. the sight made butterflies flutter in your stomach for a moment.

"you ready?" you ask, looking over at your boyfriend, your eyes darting to the hand on your thigh before looking back up.

"mhmm..." he hummed, double checking one last time before looking up and smiling at you.

"okay then..."

"hey, guys! so, we're finally doing that q&a that we said we might do during our announcement video!" you said, smiling into the camera. "we- well, I tweeted out 'ask questions for a couple q&a' which is kinda cringey but gets the point across!" you laughed awkwardly.

"yea, i mean, to be fair, we just needed something to get people to ask questions," nick said shrugging comically by lifting his arms.

"yea..." you said trailing off. "okay lets start!"

'when did you start dating?'

you read the question out loud, looking up into the camera, "a few months ago. this past november," nick nodded in agreement.

"that kinda goes with one of my questions 'how long did you guys like eachother before you started dating?'"

"oh.... umm..." you trailed off, thinking back to a few months ago when you both started talking.

"ive liked you since the first moment i saw you," nick said dreamily making you shake your head with a snile.

"shut up," you said with a giggle. "i think it was maybe a few months before then... august, september-ish? i think by then it was less of a platonic relationship if im honest."

you looked over at nick, to see him already staring at you. you smiled at him in confusion, tilting your head slightly.

"i think i liked you before then. i always thought you were really pretty. and like you were funny and nice. it just changed for some reason," he said looking into your eyes softly. "and im glad it did..."

you let out a soft breath in surprised confusion. you looked back at the camera and tried to hide your smile.

"phew... okay your turn to read a question!" you said, trying to shift the tension.

"i just did, peaches," he said nonchalantly. you looked into the camera, your eyes widening for a second before you tried to hide the flustered look on your face.

'what did the dream and george think when you told them you were dating?'

"dream already knew i was going to ask you out the night it happened. i had been talking to him about it a lot and he had kinda been telling me to just get it over with," nick said, looking at you as he spoke.

"poor guy," you said shaking your head. "he had to hear about how much you were falling in love with me." you said, flipping your hair.

"yea, he did get tired of hearing about it," he said laughing. "and george just kinda knew, i guess."

you laughed, "he texted me like a week before we officially started dating. he asked me 'are you and sapnap dating? or is it going to happen anytime soon?' and didnt know what to tell him."

'who asked out who?'

you raised your eyebrows at him in amusement once he read the question, "you should answer this one, lover boy."

nick chuckled softly and smiled. "i asked her out..."

you waited for him to continue before you realized he wasnt going to. "oh, come on," you scoffed. "okay, he called me super late at night and-"

"no! they dont need to know all of that!"

"and he basically told me that he loved me and that he wanted to be my boyfriend."

nick groaned as his face began to turn red. you grinned at him and gave him a peck on his cheek. he playfully shoved you away as you giggled.

'do you have nicknames for eachother yet?'

"just babe and baby, really..." you said, trying to recall anything youve called him aside from his name.

"same for me... and i call you peaches," he says, failing to hold back a grin as he looks at the way you shake your head.

"and mamas-"

"okay! next question!" he cut you off, causing you to let out a loud laugh.

nick looked at the camera mischievously as you waited for him to ask the next question.

'favourite position?'

"i think mine would have to be cowgirl," he says nonchalantly, keeping his eyes on his phone as he answers.

your eyes widen at him before your hand shoots to cover your mouth in shock. you turn to stare at the camera, speechless as you lean foreward and rest your elbows on your desk, covering your face in embarrassment.

nick giggles loudly, his face turning a deeper shade of red as he watches your body shake in embarrassed laughter.

"what is wrong with you?!" you yell, your voice slightly muffled by your hands.

he let out a similar high pitched laugh as he got up from his chair and covered his face in embarrassment.

you turned your face in your hands to look at him as he shook his head at you, a groan leaving both of you.

"im keeping that in."

"no youre not!"

"i have to!" you said laughing at the way he shakes his head at you. "youre the one that said it!!"

"but your not supposed to-" he groans, "dont put it in!"

"its going in!" you bleeped him saying which position in post

'is yn moving into the dream team house?'

nick looked at you, not knowing how to approach answering your question.

"i think it would make sense in terms of me being the 'honourary dream team member'," you said with air quotes. "but i dont think i will be moving in." you finish with a smile and looking back down at your phone to find your next question.

"wait you dont want to move in?" nick asks, looking at you in confusion with his head tilted slightly.

"thats not what i said," you said with a confused smile.

"so why dont you?" he asked, this time more as an invitation.

"wha- i mean-" you stammered trying to think of a way to make sense of what just happened. "you want me to?"

"of course i do," he smiled.

he leaned in and gave you a peck on your lips. you smiled and your eyes darted down to his lips again. you licked your lips subtly before leaning back in and kissing him longer this time.

nick reached his hand up to hold the side of your neck as he deepened the kiss. he licked your upper lip, causing you to lightly part them. he took that as a chance to pull on your bottom lip and lightly suck on it before pulling away from you completely.

he pulled away and licked his lips as he nonchalantly pulled out his phone to find his next question.

you looked at him speechlessly and flustered. if you looked close enough at his phone, youd notice he was staring at his home screen, also trying to compose himself. you were just trying to make a mental note to cut that out of the video. you did dw

'why did you decide to announce it now?"

"i think it was just that it felt right," you said, shrugging. "we have been officially dating for like five months-"

"technically four,"

"no?"

"baby, yes,"

"nick, if it was the end of november-"

"its not even a week of november that we dated!"

"and then the entirety of december, january, february, and now the end of march?!"

"thats four months, baby. and maybe a week!" he said waiting for you to do the math in your head. your eyes darted around as you thought for a second. then you pursed your lips and looked away from both nick and the camera in embarrassment.

"I'll still love you dont worry," nick said, reaching back over to your thigh and giving it a soft squeeze.

"shut up," you said rolling your eyes.

"wait, have a question," nick said as you were about to say your next one.

"okay," you said, unsuspecting.

'how many times a week do you have sex?'

"nick!" you look at him in disbelief.

he giggles mischievously, "it really depends on the week, sometimes its every-"

"okay! thats all we need for today!"

"isnt it 'all we have for today'?" he asks with a smirk.

"no today, its all we need," you glare at him. "im done with this q&a," you say as you shake your head.

"thank you guys so much for watching! i hope you enjoyed? dont go subscribe to him! but definitely subscribe to me!" you say with a smile on your face.

"what why?!"

yea idk if i like this much, its kinda bad. i hope you enjoyed. comment, request shit, like. idk 💜 -nony

[ador3sturniolo]

Hii!! I was wondering if you could do Matt or Chris being rude(I know they aren’t like that irl) and hurting the readers feelings, then realizing he messed up and apologized and being really clingy?? Take your time ml. xo

I’m sorry

An - First Post! Love this request 🫶🏼 NOT PROOFREAD

Paring - Chris Sturniolo X FemReader

Summary - Chris gets mad and made reader upset but he made up

Requested - Yes!

Warnings - Kissing, Language 

Word count - 1k ish

It’s been a couple days since you last saw Chris. He seemed upset the last time you saw him so you left him alone for a day. Now it’s three days later and he’s still not answering your calls, texts, or snaps.

You decide to text Matt to see what Chris is doing.

You - Hey matt, what’s chris doing right now?

Matt - He’s just on his phone

You - Oh. Alr

Matt - Is everything okay?

You - Yeah it’s all good. Is it okay if I come over?

Matt - Sure :)

You - Okay great! I’ll be there in 10

You sighed as you put your phone down as you got up to get ready. You popped on a pair of leggings and Chris hoodie that he gave to you. You brushed your hair and put on your shoes and was through the doorway before you knew it.

Chris POV :

“Hey Chris, y/n is coming over.”

Matt said as he sat up from the couch and walked to the kitchen.

“And you didn’t ask me first?” I said with annoyance

“I didn’t think I had to..?” Matt said as he walked to his room.

I rolled my eyes and walked to my own room. It’s not that I don’t like her. I love her, more than anything. I’ve just been feeling recently that she deserves way more than me, and that I’m not good enough. I’ve been ignoring her on everything, and I feel like a big dick for not just talking to her about it yet but I guess I’m just to scared too. I hear her car pull into the driveway, and I start freaking out. Is she going to yell at me? Is she mad? I’ll just play it off then and act like nothings wrong.

Your POV :

I pulled Into their driveway, scared if Chris is going to be mad at me, and if that’s why he’s been ignoring me. I build up the courage to walk inside and see Nick in the kitchen.

“Hi Nick!” I say pulling him into a hug.

“There’s my favorite girl.” He says as I chuckle.

“Um so where’s Chris?” I say getting a bit nervous. He points to his room and I walk towards the door. I knock softly and I creak the door open.

“Chris?” I say walking in slowly. Laying my eyes on him laying down in his bed on his phone.

He doesn’t say anything, just nods.

“You haven’t been responding to my texts or calls, is everything okay?” I ask walking closer to him.

“Fuck Y/n, can you just leave me alone for a bit, and not try to text me?” Our faces dropped in realization of what he said.

“Wait I di-“

“No I-it’s okay. I’ll just go.” I say turning around and walking out, tears begging to fall from my eyes. I could hear him leaving his room walking after me.

“Y/n wait, I can explain”

I was about to walk out when he grabbed my wrist to prevent me from leaving. He turned me around and pushed me up against the door.

“Im sorry. Just please let me explain”

“Do you want to break up with me?” I say looking up at him with watery eyes and a shaky breath.

“No! I would never! I love you too much”

“Then why have you been so distant lately? No answering my texts or calls” I say almost about to break down.

“Because I’m insecure. Okay? I’m scared that your in love with someone else. I feel your too good for me and I don’t deserve you.”

My face lightens up and I wipe my tears away as I grab his cheeks and pull him close, and just before I know it our lips were smashing into eachother. I pull back ready to talk.

“Chris. There is no way in hell would I love anyone else other than you. And you do deserve me, you treat me so well and you’ve been nothing but nice to me. I only love you and no one else.” I pull him in for a hug as he wraps him arms around my waist to deepen the hug.

“I’m sorry for being distant and yelling at you. I didn’t mean any of it.”

“It’s okay, I forgive you. I smile lightly.

“You look great in my clothes, you always do, make you look hot.”

I blush a little and turn away to hide my face. Chris grabs my face and turns me to look at him.

“Don’t be embarrassed.” He says, but it sounded more like a demand. He yanks my hand and takes me to his room. He pulls me into him once we’re in and starts to kiss me. We plop down together on his bed. His head in my lap and my fingers in his hair playing with it. He looks up at me with the most pretty eyes.

“Your so pretty. How’d I get so lucky.” I bush at that comment.

“Your not to bad yourself.” I say as I kiss his forehead

—————————————————————

An - Hey guys! I Hope you liked it! Please leave more requests for me to do! Sorry if this one is short! And sorry if he’s not that clingy at the end :( 🫶🏼