#Hearts of Heroes is a great series because all the characters feel so real

[oldtvandcomics]

This is such a Mood though.

Maggie: *dies* Maggie: *comes back to life with superpowers* Maggie: *spends the entire day being examined by specialized scientists trying to figure out what the fuck just happened* Varsha: “I haven’t seen D.E.B.S.” Maggie: “YOU HAVEN’T SEEN...?! And you call yourself a lesbian?! We are watching D.E.B.S. RIGHT NOW!!”

Exactly what I would have done in her position.

[ilynpilled]

GRRM on morality, heroism, villainy, and parallax in ASOIAF:

Time magazine wrote of you, “What really distinguishes Martin and what marks him as a major force for evolution in fantasy is his refusal to embrace a vision of the world as a struggle between good and evil.” Do you agree?

I think the struggle between good and evil is central to fantasy and, indeed, in some ways, central to most fiction. It's certainly a worthy subject for fiction. But I regard the struggle between good and evil as being waged within the individual human heart. […] You know, the greatest monsters of history, as we look back on them, thought they were the heroes of the story. You know, the villain is the hero of the other side, as sometimes said. That doesn't mean that it's all morally relative. That doesn't mean that all things are equally good and evil. I think there is good and there is evil in the world. But you know, it's sometimes a struggle to tell one from the other and to make the right choices. I've always been attracted to great characters, maybe because that's what I see when I look around the real world, whether I read about it in history books or the news or just people I meet. I mean, all of us have it within ourselves to be heroes. All of us have it within ourselves to be villains. We've all done good things in our lives, and most of us have also done selfish things, cowardly things, things that we're ashamed of in later years. And to my mind, that's, I don't know, the glory of the human race. We're such wonderfully contradictory, mixed-up creatures that we're endlessly fascinating to write about and read about.

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In your work, you have essentially captured Mikhail Bakhtin's concept of polyphonic fiction, where the characters are equal, and the reader can root for any of them. This has been impossible to convey on the TV series.

I wouldn't say all the characters are equal, but they have (hopefully) human traits, especially the viewpoint characters. I have seven viewpoint characters in the first book, and each book has a few more. So, by now, we're probably up to 12 or 13 viewpoint characters, and those are the ones where I go actually inside their skin, so you're seeing the world through their eyes. You're hearing their thoughts. You're feeling their emotions. And I try to paint over those viewpoint characters, and some of them are noble and just, and some of them are kind of selfish, and some of them are very intelligent, and some of them are less intelligent and even stupid. But they're all human, and I want to portray their humanity. […] I think the battle between good and evil is fought all over the world, every day, in the individual human heart, as we all struggle with the choices that define us and define our lives. And we have to choose what we are going to do, and sometimes the choice is not easy; it's not this absolute juxtaposition of the good guys and the bad guys. And I wanted to get to that with my characters, and show some of the difficulties that they face.

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Another element I liked about the series was the moral relativism of many of the characters. Too many Fantasies rely on the shorthand of truly evil villains in the absolute moral sense, but your characters, while they might commit terrible acts, generally do so either from short-sighted self-interest or because they truly believe they are acting for the best. Was this a deliberate decision, or is it just more interesting to write this way?

Both. I have always found grey characters more interesting than those who are pure black and white. I have no qualms with the way that Tolkien handled Sauron, but in some ways The Lord of the Rings set an unfortunate example for the writers who were to follow. […] Before you can fight the war between good and evil, you need to determine which is which, and that's not always as easy as some Fantasists would have you believe.

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Do you purposely start a character as bad so you can later kill them?

No. What is bad? Bad is a label. We are human beings with heroism and self-interest and avarice in us and any human is capable of great good or great wrong. In Poland a couple of weeks ago I was reading about the history of Auschwitz - there were startling interviews with the people there. The guards had done unthinkable atrocities, but these were ordinary people. What allowed them to do this kind of evil? Then you read accounts of acts of outrageous heroism, yet the people are criminals or swindlers, one crime or another, but when forced to make a choice they make a heroic choice. This is what fascinated me about the human animal.

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Martin's realm is not one of unambiguous heroes and villains. His characters, from royals to peasants, tend to be ethically mutable. So-called good people, like the noblemen Ned Stark, his son Robb Stark or the indomitable Daenerys Targaryen ("the Mother of Dragons"), make terrible mistakes - out of weakness, pride or an overly rigid sense of right and wrong. And horrible people, like Jaime Lannister, known as "the Kingslayer," do terrible things and then, over the course of several books, reveal themselves to be capable of heroism and sacrifice.

As we're discussing this in the theater, Martin quotes Shakespeare's "Julius Caesar" from memory: “The evil that men do lives after them ;/ The good is oft interred with their bones.” Then he adds his own version: “We shouldn't forget about the evil that good men do. But we shouldn't forget about the good either,” he says. “I do think a society needs heroes. They don't have to be flawless.”

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Your books have a very strong storyline associated with the atonement of sins. For example, the way of Jaime Lannister, do you yourself believe in karma?

I don’t believe in karma per se, although sometimes I have my doubts because sometimes I think I see things that could be explained by karma. But no, I don’t really have any beliefs in the supernatural. I do believe in the possibility of redemption. And I believe that human beings, all human beings, are grey. And I try to remember that when I write my characters. We are all heroes, we are all villains, we all have the capacity for great good and we all have the capacity to do things that are selfish and evil and wrong. Sometimes it’s hard to tell the difference. In your lifetime, you can be both. And it’s making choices that defines us as human beings. There’s this sensation of compartmentalism. This eagerness to judge everybody based on the worst thing they ever did, not the best thing they ever did. And you know, I think Shakespeare in "Julius Caesar" wrote “The evil that men do lives after them ;/ The good is oft interred with their bones.” And sadly that’s true. And I think it should be the reverse. We should remember the good things and the noble things that people did, and forgive them for their failures and moments of selfishness or wrongdoing because we all have them. When we forgive them, we are essentially forgiving ourselves. Redemption should be possible.

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Are there any characters that you've kind of fallen out of love with, that you just don't, you know, get excited about any more?

I still love all the characters. Even some of them who aren't very lovable. At least the viewpoint characters. When I'm writing in the viewpoint of one of these characters, I'm really inside their skin. So, you trying to see the world through their eyes to understand why they do the things they do. And we all have, even characters who are thought of to be bad guys, who are bad guys, in some objective sense, don't think of themselves as bad guys. […] “What evil can I do today?” Real people don't think that way. We all think we're heroes, we all think we're good guys. We have our rationalizations when we do bad things. “Well, I had no choice,” or “It's the best of several bad alternatives,” or “No it was actually good because God told me so,” or “I had to do it for my family.” We all have rationalizations for why we do shitty things or selfish things or cruel things. So when I'm writing from the viewpoint of one of my characters who has done these things, I try to have that in my head. And I do, so there's an empathy there that makes me love even people like Victarion Greyjoy, who is basically a dullard and a brute. But, he feels aggrieved and sees the world a certain way. And Jaime Lannister and Theon Greyjoy, they all have their own viewpoints. I love them all. Some I love more than others, I guess.

Who do you think to be the most important characters?

They're all important. I don't favor them, or I don't think of them in terms of importance. The viewpoint characters in the first book I have are Bran, Tyrion, Catelyn, Ned, Jon Snow, the two girls Arya and Sansa. There is the core of the Stark family plus Tyrion to represent the Lannister family. Then I have Dany on the other side of the sea, Daenerys Targaryen, whose story runs parallel and some ways doesn't connect to the others, but some day I'll eventually bring those two stories together. In each subsequent volume I drop some of my viewpoint characters and add new ones. Although the same core still dominates, the cast changes somewhat, and I like to do that. In the third volume which you haven't gotten to yet (he refers to me) I have a new viewpoint character. He's been a major character, but now you see things for the first time through his eyes. Which I think changes your perception of things somewhat. I like to play that kind of game, because we all have our own way of looking at the world. Something occurs and two people witness it. They might have very different versions of what happened, and very different explanations. I like to play with parallax in my fiction, and get different versions of the same thing.

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A Song of Ice and Fire has much of the complex texture of authentic history, both generally and in its specific echoes of actual historical episodes. What laws and principles (if any) in your view govern human history, and how has your understanding of historical processes shaped the series?

Historical processes have never much interested me, but history is full of stories, full of triumph and tragedy and battles won and lost. It is the people who speak to me, the men and women who once lived and loved and dreamed and grieved, just as we do. Though some may have had crowns on their heads or blood on their hands, in the end they were not so different from you and me, and therein lies their fascination. I suppose I am still a believer in the now unfashionable "heroic" school, which says that history is shaped by individual men and women and the choices that they make, by deeds glorious and terrible. That is certainly the approach I have taken in A Song of Ice and Fire.

A Song of Ice and Fire undergoes a very interesting progression over its first three volumes, from a relatively clear scenario of Good (the Starks) fighting Evil (the Lannisters) to a much more ambiguous one, in which the Lannisters are much better understood, and moral certainties are less easily attainable. Are you deliberately defying the conventions and assumptions of neo-Tolkienian Fantasy here?

Guilty as charged. The battle between good and evil is a legitimate theme for a Fantasy (or for any work of fiction, for that matter), but in real life that battle is fought chiefly in the individual human heart. Too many contemporary Fantasies take the easy way out by externalizing the struggle, so the heroic protagonists need only smite the evil minions of the dark power to win the day. And you can tell the evil minions, because they're inevitably ugly and they all wear black. I wanted to stand much of that on its head. In real life, the hardest aspect of the battle between good and evil is determining which is which.

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When you are writing the different conflicts in Westeros, do you personally pick a side? Or feel that one side fights for a more just cause than the other?

Yes, certainly. I mean, I’ve often said that I believe in grey characters, I don’t believe in black and white characters. But that’s not to say that all characters are equally grey. You know, some are very dark grey, and some are mostly white but they still have occasional flaws. I’ve always been fascinated by human beings and all of their complexity— even human beings that do appalling things, you know, the question is ‘Why?’ And it’s interesting to get inside their head and see why. Some of my viewpoint characters have done some incredibly reprehensible things: Theon, for example, or Victarion Greyjoy. Why? Were they born a monster? Weren’t they born like a cute little kid wanting to be loved and all that? We all start out that way, right? But things happen to us on the way that lead to junctures in our lives where we make decisions, and those decisions and the consequences of them color everything that comes after. You look at [historical figures] and what’s the verdict on these men? Are they heroes, are they villains? Are they great people, or people we should despise? I mean, they are fascinating characters because of their complexity.

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“I don't concern myself over whether my characters are “likeable” or “sympathetic.” (I had my fill of that in television). My interest is in trying to make them real and human. If I can create a fully-fleshed three-dimensional character, some of my readers will like him/her, or some won't, and that's fine with me. That's the way real people react to real people in the real world, after all. Look at the range of opinions we get on politicans and movie stars. If EVERYONE likes a certain character, or hates him, that probably means he's made of cardboard. So I will let my readers decide who they like, admire, hate, pity, sympathize with, etc. The fact that characters like Sansa, Catelyn, Jaime, and Theon provoke such a wide range of reactions suggests to me that I have achieved my goal in making them human.”

via

“You want the reader to care about your characters — if they don’t, then there’s no emotional involvement. But at the same time, I want my characters to be nuanced, to be gray, to be human beings. I think human beings are all nuanced. There’s this tendency to want to make people into heroes and villains. And I think there are villains in real life and there are heroes in real life. But even the greatest heroes have flaws and do bad things, and even the greatest villains are capable of love and pain and occasionally have moments where you can feel sympathetic for them. As much as I love science fiction and fantasy and imaginative stuff, you always have to go back to real life as your touchstone and say, ‘What is the truth?’”

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[pluckyredhead]

I have fallen down a Fourth World rabbit hole (this is @ngoziu's fault) and am now reading everything DC has ever published with these characters, in order, as is my wont, and I have a lot of thoughts and feelings, so I'm going to start dumping them all here. Sorry.

Background if you have no idea what I'm talking about but want to read this post anyway (why?): in 1971, Jack Kirby left Marvel because he couldn't put up with Stan Lee any longer and came to DC, where they were like "Yes you can do anything you want" (this was a lie). He immediately began writing, drawing, and editing an incredibly ambitious epic that stretched over four simultaneously published books: Superman's Pal Jimmy Olsen (we can mostly ignore this one), New Gods, Mister Miracle, and The Forever People. These books came to be known as Jack Kirby's Fourth World Tetralogy.

The books all center around the war between the utopian planet New Genesis, ruled by the benevolent Highfather, and the dystopian planet Apokalips, ruled by the evil Darkseid. At the heart of the narrative is "The Pact," aka The Cosmic Baby Swap. To ensure a (temporary) truce, Highfather and Darkseid traded sons when said children were very young - so Orion, Darkseid's son, is raised on New Genesis, and Scott Free, Highfather's son, is raised on Apokalips. Neither knows who their real father is until adulthood.

Orion grows up in a utopia, but tormented by his feelings of rage and otherness that he can't explain. Scott is raised in a torture orphanage, because that's just what happens on Apokalips, but eventually he escapes to Earth and becomes the escape artist Mister Miracle. The Cosmic Baby Swap begs what to me is the central question of the Fourth World, which is: what is the nature of good? Which boy will be a hero? The one born to good and raised by evil, or the one born to evil and raised by good?

TRICK QUESTION THEY'RE BOTH HEROES!!! GOOD IS MORE POWERFUL THAN EVIL! LOVE WINS AND FASCISM LOSES! This is so, so important to me and any version of these characters that doesn't understand the really not very complex symbolism here is invalid and kind of embarrassing for the writer (looking at you, Tom King).

Also Scott falls in love with and eventually marries Big Barda, one of Darkseid's fiercest warriors, who was born on Apokalips and raised on Apokalips and chooses good anyway. LOVE WINS AGAIN! BARDA TOPS HER TINY HUSBAND IN THE NAME OF PEACE AND COMPASSION!

Sadly DC canceled New Gods and Forever People after only 11 issues, which kind of killed Kirby's whole vision. Mister Miracle limped along until #18, but as a really pale shadow of itself. So we never really got the full scope of Kirby's original plans.

ANYWAY. That's the background. Now thoughts on the actual comics:

Superman's Pal, Jimmy Olsen: I love Jimmy, I love Superman, I love the Newsboy Legion, but this book feels very tangential to the whole Fourth World experiment and I think we can safely set it to the side. However, if you love the 90s Superboy series, I recommend dipping into this because it's the source material for a lot of Kon's worldbuilding (Cadmus, Dubbilex, clone Guardian, etc.).

The Forever People (1971): So I originally read all the Jack Kirby Fourth World stuff like...at least 15 years ago, when I was still relatively new to comics, and I'll be honest: I didn't get it. Kirby is sort of an acquired taste, and I didn't really have any context for what he was doing. I understood the metaphors, but I didn't get why people found the work appealing. And Forever People in particular was the book where I was like "Why. What is the point of this" the most.

Rereading it many years later, I find it to be a lot more moving and profound - like, the Happyland issue alone is a knockout. That said, Kirby is, uhhhh...not great at ensemble characterization without Lee, and the Forever People themselves are unforgivably bland. Default Guy! Big Guy! Black Guy! Girl! Kid! Props to Kirby for making it a not all-white group - and for introducing five out of seven of DC's first Black characters in the space of, like, two years - but it would have been nice if he gave them personalities, too.

New Gods (1971): This is Orion's book and the heart of the Fourth World. At its best, it's the pinnacle of "Makes no sense...compels me, though." Like, "Glory Boat?" I don't understand a single thing that happened in that comic but it's so fucking good. I just want to read thousands of words of comics scholars over the past 50 years going "????" in collective confused admiration.

Mister Miracle (1971): This was the book I was most invested in when I read the Fourth World years ago, because I already loved Scott and Barda from JLI, but now I think it's weaker than New Gods and arguably even than Forever People. Kirby doesn't seem as invested in going all in on Big Concepts here, and Scott escaping endless weird deathtraps is only compelling for so long. The later issues, after the other books were canceled and DC made Kirby pivot away from the Apokalips/New Genesis war, are nothing. But Scott and Barda (and Oberon and Shilo) are everything, so I guess it balances out. Anyway Scott clearly already knows a lot about Earth by the time he meets Oberon and Thaddeus Brown, so DC please feel free to hire me to write a Mister Miracle: Year One miniseries about Scott's arrival on Earth, thank you.

Okay, now for the post-Kirby (or really, intra-Kirby) stuff:

Mister Miracle (1977): This picks up the numbering from the Kirby series, running from #19-25, and was written by Steve Englehart and then Steve Gerber, and it sucks so bad. For three reasons, in escalating importance:

Riddled with continuity holes and factual errors that don't match what Kirby established. Himon is shown on New Genesis - how did he get there? Metron is depicted as subservient to Highfather when Kirby showed him as a neutral, independent agent. Etc.

The treatment of non-Scott characters is largely terrible. Oberon is written really condescendingly (Scott's like "Ride on my shoulders like you used to!" even though they definitely did not ever do that before, because Oberon is not a child). When Scott feels guilty that he's not actively fighting the war, Highfather's like "I don't want you to fight because I feel bad that I traded you to Darkseid, let Orion do it" as if that isn't the root of Orion's severe emotional trauma TOO. And worst of all is Barda, who is knocked out and captured in the first issue and spends pretty much the entire rest of the series unconscious, waiting for Scott to rescue her - except for the brief scene where she wakes up brainwashed, requiring Scott to beat the shit out of her. Lovely.

The series is reeeally fixated on the notion that Scott is a god, and extrapolates that to Scott deciding he's the messiah. Now, I'm not going to say that the Fourth World can't be used to explore Christian themes just because Kirby is Jewish, because Kirby was very definitely exploring biblical themes extensively and frankly I don't know enough about the Bible to say whether he was sticking religiously (ha) to the Old Testament. But I do think taking one of the central characters of a Jewish man's magnum opus and making him the messiah is, uh, pushing it. And there's no way to argue he's not a Christian messiah because, uh, he T-poses a lot in this series and Granny also specifically states that if Scott is the messiah, she'll find an anti-Christ to combat him (which...wouldn't that sort of by default be Orion? which just further proves that the idea of a messiah really doesn't work in the Fourth World framework). Anyway it's gross and I hate it.

New Gods (1977): I'm kind of using this as a catchall to cover all of Gerry Conway's New Gods work, which includes the actual 1977 New Gods series (which picks up the numbering from Kirby, so it's #12-19), the conclusion of the story in Adventure Comics, and the Justice League of America crossover with the Fourth World. (Also there's one issue of Super-Team Family where Lightray and Metron team up with the Flash to save Orion, who has grown really really big, but that doesn't fit with the rest of Conway's continuity so I guess we can ignore it.)

Anyway this stuff is not as infuriating as Mister Miracle, but it's also not...good. The central concept is that Darkseid has discovered that the Anti-Life Equation is contained within the brains of six humans, so Highfather sends six New Gods to protect said humans: Orion, Lightray, Metron (he doesn't work for you, Highfather), Forager (also does not work for you), Lonar, and Sensational Character Find of 1977, Jezebelle of the Fiery Eyes (Original Character Do Not Steal).

Mostly this series is frustrating because all the New Gods are wildly incompetent and fail completely at their tasks. Orion is dumbed down to The World's Most Basic Superhero (he has a big O on his chest now!). I spent the whole time yelling "HE CAN'T FLY, GERRY!" at the comics. Forager is lumped in with no mention of that whole thing where...he's a New God who was raised among the Bugs, who are being persecuted by the New Gods? I feel like that should be explained or at least addressed? (Presumably Kirby would have gotten around to it eventually.) Forager also should not be flying but here he does. I guess. Lonar flies too but mostly on his horse, which bothers me less for some reason, I'll accept a flying horse. (Also Lonar's human he's supposed to protect is Inuit and hoo boy is this comic racist. The poor guy wears a fur diaper the whole time and speaks a completely made up language.)

And then there's Jezebelle of the Fiery Eyes. Who is blue, for reasons that are never explained, and wears a bikini and fishnets because it's 1977, and mentions her fiery eyes (heat vision) every time she speaks. She's from Apokalips, but defected to New Genesis during battle. Which, like...I appreciate that Conway recognized that this team should have a female character, but what with Orion, Scott, Barda, and Inexplicably Present Himon, it feels like we have enough characters who have defected from Apokalips in some way? And it's just super weird that the ONLY female characters we have seen from New Genesis are Beautiful Dreamer of the Forever People (trapped in another dimension indefinitely) and Scott's dead mom. Like, what's the implication here? Heaven doesn't have women? Also, I know Conway was going for biblical names to match New Genesis and Izaya (he also introduces a Lucifar), but, like...Jezebelle? JEZEBELLE. Your only female New God and you named her "whore." Amazing.

And with that, we have covered the New Gods in the 70s (minus some Mister Miracle/Batman teamups). Next time: the 80s, and Kirby tries so so hard to kill Orion but DC won't let him.

[simpcityy]

I'm Not Her Pt.6 (Father Miguel O’Hara x Teen! Daughter Reader)

Summary: Miguel O’Hara is your biological father but it’s not great being his daughter when he’s hooked in the past still.

Disclaimer: I do not own Marvel or any of its characters. This short One-Shot has made it into a series! Read part one, two, three and four please to understand the prompt better. (Linked Below) This chapter is full on Miguel's POV.

Word Count: 1.1k

Warnings: Use of female pronouns, Use of (Y/N), angst, Father Miguel, overall, it’s just sad for now. Other dimensional Miguel… cursing, maybe consider yandere behavior from other dimensional Miguel ...Uhhh...angst... I think that is all for now.

Notes: So, this is the LAST chapter, thank you so much for those who commented to form ideas! I love you all! Also, I am working on a new series from Baldur's gate 3 with a certain Vampire Spawn, first part is out so please check that out.

Pt.1 Pt.2 Pt.3 Pt.4 Pt.5 Pt.6

Chaos was happening around in the apartment, variant Miguel chases you, blocking each time you try to run to the front door. “ Te lo prometo (Y/N)” he says, being on the other side of the coffee table as you stand on the other end trying to decide which way to run. “I’ll be the father you always wanted; I already proved you before you found out. Piensa en lo feliz que estabas!” He exclaims. You only shook your head, “ No! I…you…it can’t happen!” You ran to the right only for him to tackle you down. “ Solo escucha!” he roars, hugging you tightly, not letting you go despite how much you try to push away. “Let me go!” You tear up feeling so conflicted, he had a point, you were so happy. Able to spend time with this variant thinking it was your dad. It would be nice to experience this every day for the rest of your life…but no, deep down…you knew it was wrong. Even if that dimension (Y/N) is long dead, it felt so wrong, as if you were taking her father, especially his grief for her. “No!” You yelled before gasping as a web gets shot at his face, breaking his hold on you. 

    You were feeling overwhelmed, you felt weak how can you be part of the Spider Society when you can’t fight this variant, was it because he looked just like your father, your mind was telling you it’s not him, you can inflict some punches on him but your heart was being blinded how identical he looked as your real father. You look at his eyes, they hold so much regret, you wonder, does your real father feel the same way now that you’re in this situation. “ I am not your (Y/N)” You whisper before kicking him off you with all your strength which surprised you. That’s right, this variant isn’t the same as your father. This Miguel was just a normal guy, no spider powers, you can’t hurt him. Quickly getting up, you looked at him “ Please…you have to go back. You don’t belong here.” You whispered. “ Soon everyone will be here and they will hurt you…in a hero type way but still…it’s going to hurt…and I don’t know what they’ll do once they have you captured.” “No, I have given up everything to be back with you…I need to make up for everything.” He whispers looking at you with a broken look, “ I don’t care what they do to me.”

   Miguel looks around the apartment, seeing items on the ground or broken. There was no sign of you or the other Miguel. “(Y/N)!” He yells calling out to you. He walks into your room, seeing if there are any signs of you. He felt as if the universe was taunting him, feeling the same overwhelmed emotions on the day he lost Gabriella. “Lyla!” He calls out before looking over to see Peter walk over a note on his hand. “Here…it’s for you.” He hands him the note that Miguel knew was yours. The same handwriting as the cards you would give him on his Birthday before stopping. The day you stopped giving him cards, was the day you slowly distance yourself from him. The day you stopped trying to salvage the father and daughter relationship. He grabbed the note, his eyes scanning it over quickly. 

“I know you might be wondering where I am. You don’t have to worry, I am safe and have no reason to go find me. I decided that it’s better if I go with this variant and no, he is not holding a knife to my neck as I write this. This is my decision and no one else. The day you left…I was too young to understand why but as I grew up, slowly I was learning the truth…the painful truth. This other version of you…was speaking the truth…that I deserve better…that I should be selfish for once. You had no idea how badly I wanted to run away each birthday…celebrating alone or with the others which I thank them…but I always wanted you…I want my father…there’s a part of me…the little girl in me wanting and reaching for your love…but everyone has their limits as you told me before. I reached my limit and I decided to think of myself…my health…my happiness…dad…As much as the other variant wants me to hate you… I will still love you…no matter how shitty you are. You are my dad but for once…I am letting this inner child have what I wanted, a father. I fixed my watch, so I won’t glitch in the other dimension and took off my location. This is goodbye…I finally came to the conclusion that I’ll never be her…you see me as Gabriella sometimes but it’s time you learn…I’m not her.” 

Miguel only stood quiet before slowly sitting on the ground gripping the paper. He makes his holographic suit turn off his mask. He looks up at the frames you had hung on your wall. He reaches over to your nightstand pulling off one frame you had. He held the photo of you close. Peter stood at the door, watching Miguel before walking into the living room to report Jess what happened. He flinched hearing Miguel tearing things down cursing out in Spanish before hearing the man sobbed. He looks down, knowing it must be painful to lose a kid. He knew he would feel the same if anything happened to Mayday, but he knows this pain is much stronger since Miguel once again lost another kid. 

    You look out through the city of this new dimension, looking at people being passed as you ride the bus. Feeling a warm hand on your shoulder, you look up seeing the variant Miguel smile “Don’t worry, it might be different, but I’ll be here to guide you.” He smiles. You only nod looking out the window again before down at your watch. Biting your lip, trying to hold in your tears. A part of you felt guilty but you didn’t want a repeat of the same empty feeling. You only lean your head into Variant Miguel shoulder while he holds you close, rubbing your back as you weep silently on the bus. 

   'I’m not her and she’s not me.' You thought, always wanting him to see that but you gave up on waiting. You could only hope this new life would heal you.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Author Notes: SOOO I know and I'm sorry if the ending isn't what you were thinking. maybe...maybe we could make a sequel...depends on if you all want it. Also again, I started a little Astarion x Fem!Reader so please check that out if you are a Baldur's Gate 3 fan. Thank you all so much for the support!

Spanish Translation: 1. Te lo prometo: I promise you 2.  Piensa en lo feliz que estabas!: Think about how happy you were! 3. Solo escucha!: Just listen!

Taglist: @perfectprofessorloverapricot @otaku-degenarate @strbyallycow @zeyzeys-stuff @moonshine147 @dhadiirah @ghibliwatcher @certified-kaeya-kinnie @luvsvnlqt-things @lunamhm565i @sangdium45 @lazyotakuofficial @ihateuguys @pinkeroppi @lady-necromancer @ayanokomu @coralineyouareinterribledanger @idcalol @punnylilac @ace-spades-1 @marxo5 @reiko69 @itadorismedicalstudent @bontensbabygirl @Simpthe3rd @fluffyart5000 @blkmystery @ariparri @i-d-k-f-r @champomiel @oooof-ifellforyou @jannajuju @staple-your-mouth @atanukileaf @namtaeh @estella-satn @darlin-collins @acebalikkanaplease @luvers-checks @arrozyfrijoles23 @sigynxlokiwifelover @millerworld @perilous-pasta @tired-writer04 @marit332 @kiyomi-uchiha777 @zoeyserpentluck @marcswife21 @mushy-mushroom04 @jjayaaa @idoltrine @daughterofthequeen @filthybunny420

[antikate]

I genuinely think romance is a deeply underrated genre that is sneered upon because of its associations with femininity; I think it’s utopian and hopeful and worthwhile and I crave good romance stories. At the same time I hate most romance novels that I try to read.

I had Covid this week and for a few days was too sick to even look at a book or screen so I downloaded a bunch of audiobooks from the library and I gave up on every single one of them:

1. Notorious by Minerva Spencer. I noped out of this a few pages in when one character was described as delectable and luscious and another character’s eyes were described as orbs. The book also comes with a whole heaping of misogyny and Islamophobia apparently.

2. Georgie All Along by Kate Clayborn. The first ??? 20 ??? Or so pages of this book consist of the heroine back in her home town and going into a deli to order a coffee and not having enough money to pay for it because she left her wallet in the car. 20 pages!!! It’s humiliating and is literally like being stuck in the head of the most neurotic person you’ve ever met. Page after page of this woman ruminating about what a loser she is. Exhausting! And I say this as someone who can ruminate at the Olympic level.

3. Pretty Pretty Boys by Gregory Ashe. This one is an m/m series about two cops who fall in love and I had hopes that it might be solid but the characterization was basically “whatever the author felt like writing”. Also the cops act like cops as in they’re abusive to random people and spend a lot of time being horrible, which I don’t really need in a romance.

4. Not Your Average Hot Guy, Gwenda Bond. Idk this was just. A bit? Boring? Also everyone was just a bit too self consciously sassy. The heroine runs an escape room but one of her props turns out to be actually a demonic book. I think one of my issues with this book and so many other romance novels is that banter is a real skill and most people can’t write it. But everyone, regretfully, tries.

5. Liar City, Allie Therin. There’s this one audiobook narrator who has such a snotty voice that I just cannot. This book might have been great but the instant I started listening I knew it was that dude. Maybe I’ll try it as an actual book.

6. The Blacksmith Queen by GA Aiken. This is one of the worst books I’ve ever tried to read. Truly. The heroine is a blacksmith and the hero is a centaur, which I thought sounded fun (also I was wondering how they’d have sex because I’m like that) but it was … puerile? Astonishingly stupid?

7.Capture the Crown, Jennifer Estep. This is also an absolutely idiotic book. The hero has amethyst eyes and the heroine has some other gem coloured eyes and someone else has sapphire eyes and if you took a shot every time it someone’s eye colour was described as a jewel tone you’d be hospitalised for alcohol poisoning by about page four.

8. A taste of gold and iron, Alex Rowland. This is decently written - as in the prose is solid - but the plot is half baked, the characters are tedious, and the world building is intriguing but paper thin. I’d say it’s a much better book than most here, but I still couldn’t bring myself to finish.

Not everything I’d read lately has been terrible so here’s some romance or romance adjacent books I have actually enjoyed:

1. The Heart Principle by Helen Hoang: This book is not going to change your life but it does what sets out to do with a slight if entertaining love story.

2. The Secret Lives of County Gentlemen, KJ Charles: I think Charles is one of the best and smartest historical romance writers I’ve ever read. Her books are everything I want out of romance: the characters are interesting, idiosyncratic, and sympathetic; the details feel right; the stories work; and the sex scenes are both hot and do important plot and character work. Her books are swoony and emotional and feel very real while still being romantic. (The audio narrator of this let it down a little because he took a lot of odd pauses but I’m being super nitpicky.)

3. A Far Wilder Magic, Allison Saft: This is a sweet YA novel set in an interesting fantasy world - I really enjoyed the prickly heroine and her dog.

4. In Memoriam, Alice Winn: This beautiful, heart-rending novel is not exactly a romance - it’s set during WW1 and has very explicit and realistic scenes set in the trenches. The trauma and suffering of the war are achingly portrayed. But it is a love story between two young soldiers, even if it’s not necessarily one with an easy or simple ending. Highly recommend with the caveat that Winn does not shy away from the brutality and senselessness of WW1.

5. Thornhedge, by T Kingfisher: This is a brief but resonant Sleeping Beauty retelling. Not exactly a romance but also not unromantic. My only complaint is that I wanted more. I’m a big T Kingfisher fan, and I adore her practical, earthy characters (like Toadling).

6. We Could Be So Good, Cat Sebastian: I’m here for everything Sebastian writes. Her books are low stakes but still compelling, her characters are likeable and complex, I actually enjoy her banter, and she has a knack for capturing historical details and moments. Her conflicts never feel fake and the resolutions are always earned.

[fondofeveryprickle]

My AO3 Wrapped 2023

Welcome to my AO3 Wrapped 2023, where I take a look at some of my favourite fics from 2023 (one bookmark per month). 

There were so many amazing fics in 2023, so many new people and friends I met because of fanfic <3 So here’s to a very good 2024, full of words and worlds!

Let’s go to the fics:

January-

The Fine Line Between Hormones and Home by seekingmoonscapes (Bad Buddy: The Series)

In an almost canon universe where the only difference is that it is omegaverse, Pat is an omega, and Pran is an alpha. And during one of his heats, Pat is at home, and decides to ask Pran for a shirt with his scent to help with his heat. But instead, he asks Pran for help in other ways. Fic where the porn IS the plot, everything is super consensual, and sexy and hot. Alternating POV, so on Pran’s pov we get to see all the pining.

February - 

If Never Again, If Every Day by gallifreyburning and takiki16 (The Old Guard)

This fic was wonderful from beginning to end. For reasons, 2021 Nicky goes back in time to Jerusalem and his first death at Yusuf's hands. Meanwhile, 1099 Nicolò goes forward in time to 2021 and meets Joe. It's heartbreaking and loving and funny and so full of love. Nicky and Joe miss each other even when around their younger versions. But the love they feel for each other is stronger than that. Wonderful story, happy ending.

March - 

Wooing the Water Tribe by lenaballena (ATLA) @dameferre

Sokka has been living in the Fire Nation as Zuko's second in power and his best friend and everything. When Katara comes to visit, Sokka thinks Zuku is courting her. And he realizes he is also in love with his best friend. Lots of pining. There's absolutely no courting of Katara. It's also really funny. My heart broke for Sokka at some moments.

April - 

The Grand Unified Theory of Shen Qingqiu by 00janeblonde (SVSSS)

WIP - This story is all fluff and no angst, like the tags say, slice of life and it's wonderful. SQQ dies at Maigu Ridge, and is offered to acquire the Game Plus, where he can go back to the past with his cultivation and memory intact, and try again. Doing that he discovers that he is actually the real Shen Jiu reincarnated, and he can try to recover memory markers to be able to restart the "game" even before than when he first "transmigrated". His friendship with YQY becomes strong, LQG also becomes his friend (it's really sweet how he wants his friends back). Everything is very soft. Absolutely great teacher SQQ.

May - 

but for me, there is a storm by Authoress (Haikyuu!!) by @kiribakus

An epic pacific rim au. Hinata and Kageyama are both cadets who want to be Jaeger pilots, but they cannot get along. So they work really hard because they are their last hope to pilot a one of a kind Jaeger - a Kaiju/Machine hybrid. They solve their problems in the beginning (and then later they have more problems). Hinata and Kageyama are not the only main characters, other characters are also very important and have their own storyline and pov. This story is heartbreaking as well. There's MCD, and it made me cry so hard I got puffy eyes. It's a wonderful read, and very well written.

June - 

The UA Analyst Kid by RogueVector (BNHA)

Izuku meets the UA teachers before getting OFA and they see how good his analysis is, so they start to train him (together with some other heroes). But some things don't change and Izuku still meets All Might and gets offered OFA. This story is funny, sweet and with amazing relationships. Izuku is OP with his intelligence and training. All the teachers and heroes are so supportive and good. A really feel good story.

July - 

Deku? I think he’s some pro… by Clouds (BNHA)

After All Might told Izuku he can't be a hero, he finds himself in a forum used by some underground heroes and offers his analysis to them, since he can't be a hero, he will help them. The underground heroes think Izuku is some kind of retired pro when they ask for help analyzing some villains and all, and when they finally meet face-to-face they all decide to practically adopt Izuku and teach him to fight so he will have a chance to be a quirkless hero. It is amazing! Also, the relationship between Izuku and the underground heroes is more like friends than teacher-student, and it's amazing that way. (some All Might bashing - be warned)

August - 

Mobius by Foxquills (BNHA) @fox-quills

WIP - I love this story so much!!! Third-year Izuku is sent to the past because of a quirk accident, to the time both Shouta and Hizashi are third year students at UA. Problem is, according to Nedzu, time is constant, or a loop, so he can’t change anything in the past, and everything that has happened, will happen again. He becomes fast friends with both Shouta and Hizashi, and starts crushing on them as well. Both Hizashi and Shouta also start crushing on him. It is lovely. There’s pain. It’s awesome. (also omegaverse).

September - 

Factory Settings by Anonymous (Good Omens)

Post season 2 au, because Crowley follows Aziraphale to heaven. Things happen, and instead of Crowley, there is Raphael, without any memory of all the time he's lived as Crowley. Heaven and Hell are at it again. Aziraphale has no idea what to do, and he misses his Crowley. Muriel is a sweetheart. Both Aziraphale and Crowley/Raphael povs. Great story, feels very much canon.

October - 

Justice in Defiance by Foxquills (BNHA) @fox-quills

WIP - Aizawa is a hero turned villain who kills both heroes and villains alike. And one day Izuku finds him right after he kills someone. They fight. And now Izuku needs to know more. What made Aizawa turn????? To do that, he will also need Hizashi in his corner. Absolutely lovely story!!!! The povs are amazing. The feelings and pining are perfect.

November - 

If I Must Starve (Let it be in Your Arms) by Igneum807 (The Witcher)

So think about the softest story involving Jaskier and touch-starved witchers, and this is the result. During his travels alone, when he and Geralt go their different ways for a few weeks, Jaskier meets Geralt's brothers, who are just as touch and companionship-starved as Geralt was before meeting Jaskier. It's super soft and tender.

December - 

Cultivate: Slow Life on a Monster-Infested Mountain by NeonGhostCat (SVSSS) @neonghostcat

When SY transmigrates, the System tries to put him on SQQ's body, but SQQ is aware and is able to stop it from happening. The System then gives SY his own body, but something goes wrong with the system and SY is decided to not get involved with the plot, or with Cang Qiong Sect, and specially SQQ. He finds an abandoned mountain, with an abandoned house there and decides to stay there until he is strong enough if SQQ finds him and wants to kill him. Obviously things cannot be that simple. Now he is stuck on the mountain he can't get out of, every full moon night there are monster attacks and one day LQG appears on the Mountain, how can he get out of helping with the plot now? Shen Yuan is absolutely perfect on this fic. I love how he deals with the mountain and its beasts and plant-life. Liushen is the softest you'll see. Slow burn, super domestic, feel good story.

~

Enjoy your readings!

[blueskittlesart]

feelings on the ‘link who went into the shrine of resurrection isnt the same one who came out’ theory/hc? apologies if this has already been clarified

sigh. this theory occupies the exact same niche in my mind as the "link is dead in mm" theory tbh (by which i mean its the bane of my fucking existence.) Technically, i believe it is possible within the preestablished lore of the franchise. However, I think the only way you come to a conclusion like this is by deliberately ignoring a lot of the writing of the game.

in my opinion, loz as a franchise is at its best when it functions as a thematic narrative. my favorite games in the series all function as narratives on two levels--the first is the obvious one, the hero's journey story that the player actually physically plays through. the second level is the one that really hooks ME on these games though, and that's the thematic level. oot, for example, is essentially a story about a young boy going on a journey to save his kingdom. But on a thematic level, it's about the relationships between adults and children and the trauma of growing up. breath of the wild functions similarly. essentially it is a story about a boy waking up with no memories and saving a princess from a monster. but on a thematic level, botw is a commentary on trauma and growth and healing.

the gist of the theory you're talking about is that the original pre-calamity link was unable to be resurrected and the shrine of resurrection just made a new one in his place, and that's why he has no memories. depending on how deep into the theory you go, some suggest that everyone the original link knew pre-calamity is in on this conspiracy and are deliberately gaslighting the new link into believing he is the same person as the original. to be entirely honest, i think it technically works on a purely literal level. COULD the shrine of resurrection have probably made a new link? yes. COULD zelda and everyone else be conspiring to convince link he's a real boy? sure. technically yes. there's not REALLY anything wrong with this from an in-universe standpoint. it's all technically possible. but imo the only way to come to this conclusion is to ignore the fact that botw functions on a secondary level as a metaphor.

I think there's a tendency among a certain type of superfan to forget that media is created by PEOPLE, and that writing decisions are made deliberately. especially in a game as vast and immersive as botw, it's admittedly easy to forget sometimes that the world and the narrative were crafted by human beings and therefore narrative and worldbuilding decisions were made for a reason. but if you take a step back and analyze it from a writer's perspective, botw's thematic narrative is almost richer than its face-value story. it's built into the characters, the world, the lore, EVERYTHING in the game is structured around its central themes. this is part of what i believe makes botw such a successful and relatable game. Its central message, that it's never too late for growth, that healing is possible, that just because things are broken doesn't mean they can't be fixed, is woven so beautifully into the very bones of the game. There's a REASON that link wakes up with no memories, and it's not because he's a victim of a kingdom-wide conspiracy about his own death. it's because he is meant to seem broken beyond repair. he wakes up on the near-abandoned great plateau--DELIBERATELY abandoned, because the player is meant to view the world as broken beyond repair at this point in the story, with no memories, no heart containers, no stamina. A shell of the warrior he once was. and the rest of the game is dedicated to the discovery that he can heal. he can find his memories, he can grow stronger, he can form new relationships and he can do better. hope was not lost when he fled hyrule castle 100 years ago. hope is never lost so long as there are people who are willing to keep trying to rebuild. hyrule is not a dead, abandoned kingdom as it first seems when you awake. Hyrule is ALIVE. there are cities and stables and merchants and travelers and people living and dying and continuing on every single day.

to suggest that link didn't actually survive requires you to, at best, deliberately ignore all of that thematic setup, and at worst, retcon it out of existence. if link isn't really link, if the whole world is conspiring against him, then that means that the original link really was doomed. that he can never heal from what happened to him. that he was exactly what he believed himself to be--a failure who doomed hyrule to a century of suffering. it removes link's agency and his impact as the main character of this story--if he was never hurt in the first place, he has nothing to heal from. there's no message there, nothing to be learned. he's just going through the motions of the story because he's been told to--arguably falling into the exact same trap that the original did.

again, is the theory technically plausible? yes. in-universe, the groundwork exists for it to have happened. but if you refuse to look at a narrative outside of its own governing universe, it's easy to forget that people tell stories for a reason. botw is written the way it is because its writers had something to say. Why does link lose all his memories after the shrine? In-universe, this is a mystery, yes. to someone who is only willing to examine that plot point within the confines of that universe, yeah, it seems like a plot hole, and yeah, this theory might explain it. but from a writer's perspective, it's not a plot hole at all. it's a clear, deliberate writing decision. just because a story asks you to suspend your disbelief a little bit for the sake of the greater narrative doesn't mean that the writers are actually secretly plotting a conspiracy and link isn't really link. it means you're being asked to either willingly suspend your disbelief, or examine why you're being asked to do so from a writing standpoint.

[battlekidx2]

Across the Spider Verse Thoughts

Across the spider verse was my most anticipated movie of 2023. I came in with sky high expectations and yet somehow the movie managed to surpass them.

By the end of the opening sequence across the spider verse had me sold that this was going to be one of my favorite spider-man movies and when the movie finished that belief held true. Spider-Man across the spider verse is easily one of my favorite superhero movie sequels of all time (I actually think it might be my favorite). The movie just came out and I’ve already seen it, what my brother has dubbed, “too many times” (Though I vehemently disagree with him on that point).

It’s a movie sold on its scope and love for all of spider-man and his lore and yet it never loses its heart in the spectacle. It manages to be a fantastic middle chapter to what is quickly becoming one of my favorite film series of all time.

There’s a lot I want to talk about so I’m just going to get right into it.

Miles is a great protagonist

Miles Morales is a character that I felt Into the Spider Verse really elevated. I had read all of the ultimate comics spider-man run that was his debut series and, while I liked Miles, he was never in the top tier of my favorite superheroes, but that quickly changed with Into the Spider Verse. They managed to explore his struggle and hesitance to accept the Spider-man mantle in a way that was far more compelling than his comic book counter part.

Across the Spider Verse takes the already really strong basis that Into the Spider Verse created for Miles and builds on it through a brilliant meta narrative on what it means to be spider-man and asking the question of whether or not Miles really is spider-man.

Trauma is so ingrained into the creation and growth of spider-man as a character. Ask anyone to list what the most iconic moments in spider-man comics are and you are bound to get answers that include uncle ben’s death, the death of gwen stacy, the death of Jean DeWolfe, Captain Stacy’s death, etc.

There are a lot of moments of loss within the spider-man mythos that define the character and these moments are carried over into a lot of spider-man media outside of the comics. Miles’ rejection of this narrative and the necessity of loss to make a hero in this movie is what truly makes him become spider-man.

The first movie had him accepting the mantle but this is where he truly grows into the role.

Outside of the mask Miles is a unique and three dimensional character as well.

Miles has a youthful charm and good heart that feels authentic to a high schooler that has yet to experience a lot of what life has to offer without falling into feeling like a middle schooler or a caricature of a teenager like MCU Peter Parker tends to do at certain points in his trilogy.

I think this is displayed really well in his relationship with Gwen. There’s an innocence and inexperience there that shows that this is his (an her) first attempt at a real relationship but it never feels surface level because the movie does a great job at selling their bond and how they are similar in key ways that makes it so the understanding they find in one another feels natural.

This elevates the betrayal he feels when it’s revealed that Gwen and Peter B Parker knew everything Miguel reveals to him the whole time and it makes his goodbye to Gwen all the more impactful.

Another relationship I want to shed light on is the one Miles has with his parents.

Miles’ bond with both his parents in this movie is phenomenal but the relationship that is really allowed to shine is the one between Miles and his mother, Rio.

I loved the expansion of Rio Morales’ role. In the first movie she was a memorable but underused character (understandably) and her relationship to Miles took a backseat to his relationship to his father. But here we get to see their unique bond and her attempts to understand him and learn to give him the space he needs to grow into his own person. It felt earned that she was the one he was going to reveal his identity to first before it was revealed that the Rio he told wasn’t from his universe.

As it stands Miles’ arc isn’t complete, but what is shown and the place he is left in make for a strong set up for the finale of this three part story. I have complete faith that this trilogy will stick the landing and provide satisfying conclusions to the arcs and relationships that have been set up. Miles has really become one of the best iterations of the spider-man character and one of my favorites to hold the mantle. I can’t wait to see what they do with him in the next movie.

Gwen’s increased role

One of my favorite changes from the first movie is the amount of emphasis put on Gwen and her arc.

I knew after Into the Spider Verse that if they were going to make a sequel Gwen would likely have a much bigger role considering the seeds they planted to have her connection to Miles grow and the fact that where she was on her journey as a spider-person had her in the perfect place to be a foil to him moving forward. It felt like a natural progression, but even knowing that and having read the Spider-Gwen comics, the way the movie utilized her was better than I ever could have hoped.

Across the Spider Verse took the potential for Gwen as a character and foil for Miles and ran with it by creating a duality in how their arcs compare to one another.

The opening sequence very purposefully made her a dark parallel to Miles, a cautionary tale of what could go wrong if he unmasks himself to his parents and an extreme case of the isolation he could experience throughout his journey. But also just like Miles she’s very early on in her journey as Spider-woman. She’s not even out of high school so many of her canon events haven’t happened yet and, like she learns later on in the film, her story isn’t set in stone.

She’s on that same journey of self discovery and forging your own path that Miles is and having this contrast between them elevates both their arcs.

She’s not just an amazing foil for Miles. She’s also an excellent vehicle for the movie’s themes.

Across the spider verse is centered around themes of isolation, fate, the weight of life, and making your own path and, while Miles is undoubtedly the protagonist of the feature, Gwen is the one the movie tells a complete arc with surrounding these themes.

Her loneliness was hinted at in the first movie but it’s put on full display here with the opening 20 minutes hammering home just how isolated she is in her world and how much the loss of Peter Parker and her role in his death has effected her.

Gwen lacks any sort of support system at the start of the movie. Even before the showdown with Vulture there’s a disconnect between her and her police captain father that stems from the fact that he’s leading the hunt for Spider-woman, her alter ego, because he believes she killed Peter. She struggles to open up to anyone else and make friends in her world because of her life as spider-woman and how intrinsically tied it is to her issues. And she’s lost the only people she feels could understand her with no way that she knows of to see them (particularly Miles) again.

The opening culminates with Gwen losing the last person she has left in her own world when her father tries to arrest her after she unmasks herself to him and she flees her world to join Miguel’s spider society.

This all sets up a very powerful arc dealing with her loneliness and struggles with doing the right thing in the face of her fear of rejection and loss where she finally really opens up to other people and “starts her own band” to stand against Miguel O’Hara through her connection with Miles and desire to help him as well as her reconciliation with her father.

This movie asks questions about whether or not trauma and loss are necessary to make you spider-man so it’s significant that it is instead through healing from parts of her trauma, reconnecting with her father, and making genuine connections that Gwen is able to grow as a hero. It says a lot about what this movie believes makes someone “spider-man”.

Another moment in Gwen’s arc that exemplifies what the movie believes makes a hero is actually Gwen’s reconciliation with her father where he reveals he quit the force. That moment proves that Miguel’s belief is wrong and that breaking the canon isn’t the end of the multiverse as they know it. This coupled with the fact that it’s Gwen’s speech about her desire to do what’s right and protect those she loves that gets her father to quit tells you everything this movie is trying to say about heroism. It’s not the loss and trauma that makes you spider-man but the character of the person behind the mask.

The opening also does a great job of establishing just how much Miles impacted Gwen in the first movie. He broke through this wall of isolation she put around herself and for the first time in a long while she found a genuine connection with someone who could understand and know all of her. It sells you immediately on how much this bond means to her and makes her conflict moving forward really compelling.

This relationship is a linchpin in the narrative of this film so if it didn’t work then the impact the movie’s story and themes would have been severely hampered.

If I’m being honest Gwen’s arc is where the movie hit me the hardest. I think everyone has dealt with loneliness and that feeling of isolation that can come from being different and/or grief. There’s always that underlying desire for understanding and community that many people fear they’ll never have and seeing that portrayed in Gwen hit for me.

It’s the kind of desire I know I feared I would never get, but when I left home and went out on my own I was finally able to find people who understood me and accepted my idiosyncrasies in a way no one ever had before. And I always get emotional when I see that same isolation I felt portrayed in such a raw way and when those characters I see it in finally find the connection they need.

It’s also this isolation that goes a long way to explain why so many spider-people would join Miguel’s task force and go along with his plans. There’s a sense of community where all these people who have lost so much can find other people who understand them. That understand their unique form of grief, loss, and isolation that they struggle to find anywhere else because of the path they chose to take with their life. And won’t reject the half of them they are usually forced to hide from those they care about. Without showing this through Gwen’s perspective the last act of the film could have felt forced.

Gwen is a strong character that really grew into her role as the deuteragonist of the film and the role of spider-woman and serves to strengthen the themes of the film. She’s a great character that has so much potential moving forward and I look forward to her role and eventual reunion with Miles in Beyond the Spider Verse.

The animation

It’s no secret that spider verse changed the animation industry after it came out. Before spider verse many animated movies had started to feel like they fell into a very similar style that focused on realism above all else and in many ways I felt didn’t fully capitalize on what animation could do as a medium (there were exceptions but a lot of studios were starting to lean on the Disney/Pixar animation style). But now there are shows and movies that are taking a page out of spider verse’s book and experimenting. Studios are less afraid to let their animators get creative and it’s been incredible to see.

Across the Spider Verse continues to push the envelope and goes beyond what they did with the first one to create one of the most visually stunning movies I’ve ever seen.

The way they experimented with the animation in different dimensions to bring comic book art styles to life (Gwen’s universe) and further accentuate the character and culture they are centered around (Hobie and Pavitr’s universes) really served to elevate the story, heighten the emotions of every scene, and make this truly feel like a multiversal epic.

One of my favorite visual flares in the movie is how color is used in Gwen’s universe. In the opening it really plays up the stark divide she feels between her and everyone else. She feels like she’s completely separate from the world around her through the very deliberate contrast in coloring and the way the background bleeds and morphs around her. She’s frequently portrayed in shades of blue while the world around her is full of vibrant pinks, oranges, and white.

I also love how the paint like aesthetic of her world’s backgrounds are used to heighten the emotions of scenes like the talks she has with her father. The background bleeds and the colors morph to reflect the emotions of the characters talking. When Gwen is desperately trying to reach out to her father in the beginning after she unmasks herself and at the end when she admits how powerless she feels to protect those she cares about the background starts to run and the colors bleed together and it captures how her world is falling apart and her path forward is no longer clear.

I also want to point out how the lighting is one of the major hints that Miles isn’t on earth-1610. The lighting of every scene from the moment Miles is sent to earth-42 is some shade of purple or green which immediately gives the world a different feel than Miles’. It’s not so noticeable at first that it gives away the twist but it’s enough that it gives you an uneasy feeling the first time through and it’s details like these that elevate the reveal on rewatch.

This level of care and attention to detail permeates every frame of the film. There isn’t a single second of this movie that is wasted and it really uses the medium of animation to its fullest potential.

I can’t wait to see what they have in store for us in Beyond the Spider Verse. If it’s anything like this then it will be amazing.

conclusion

Spider-man is far and away my favorite hero. I’ve read many of his comic book runs, I own all his movies and video games, I’ve seen all his shows, etc. I’m the massive fan that probably understood way too many obscure references that this movie made and I loved every second of the movie I got to see.

I had so much fun with this movie and I hope everyone who watched the movie managed to get some enjoyment out of it. I can’t wait for Beyond the Spider Verse to come out and to finally get to see the conclusion to this animated trilogy.  

side note

Spider-man is a character that is able to speak to a wide range of people because of the struggles he faces. Having a movie that understands the diversity of the people who relate to the character and reflect that on screen through the many (canonical) spider-people portrayed is amazing.

I love that so many people will get to see someone like them being the hero they admire. Stan Lee himself said that anyone can wear the spider-man mask. He wanted people to be able to see themselves in the heroes he created which was the basis of spider-man (and the x-men but that’s another story). And that’s something that I will always love about the character.

[susagnon]

Katsuki and Izuku are not best friends, part 3

The start of "To the Limit" was a perfect fit for their escape. Forever one of my favourite music moments in this series.

When Deku designated Kirishima to be the one holding his hand out to Bakugou, he wasn't only thinking about the pure likelihood of Bakugou being willing to hitch their ride. I'm convinced that Deku took what Uraraka said before the Bakugou-Rescue-squad went to Kamino, to heart: Deku thought about Bakugou’s potential feelings regarding who would hold out their hand to him.

Let’s fast-forward a bit:

This was the wrong way for Deku to offer Bakugou a helping hand. At this stage of his character development, Bakugou would have not been able to accept this type of help from most people, but least of all from Deku.

This had been the right way to help Bakugou. Deku's narration during the scene confirms his own recognition of it. And Bakugou didn't lash out against this help from Deku, only because he didn't recognize it as such.

Let’s fast-forward a bit more:

By the time Bakugou and the rest of 1-A launched Iida at Deku, he had accumulated enough character development, that his actions mirrored Deku's thinking during Kamino: Speed is Class Rep’s thing, so having him chasing Deku had the highest chances of success - but it's also better for Deku’s comfort.

With Iida, Deku doesn’t have to fear being called a stupid for having done what he did or having all of his shortcomings pointed out.

When it’s his turn to talk Deku into coming back with them, good boy Bakugou doesn’t do any of that. But Deku’s been conditioned to expect mainly such reactions from him and couldn’t have known that Bakugou would behave differently. With Iida, Deku feels secure. Iida is Deku’s friend unreservedly, so the emotional defences that the rest of 1-A have chipped away at, are better broken through by their Class Rep.

My point is, for all that meddling when you don't need to be is supposed to be the essence of a hero, I think that both Deku and Bakugou would feel like it's not their place, to do so for each other, if there are better suited people who can (and will) do the same for them respectively.

To put it differently, there are some things that Bakugo and Deku can do for each other. And there are other things, that they can’t - including things that most would view as essential to a (best) friend.

Type C: Spending time with each other voluntarily

Aside from Deku trying to hang out with Bakugou when they used to be little children, I can only remember one instance, where they spend time with each other one-on-one voluntarily:

After Bakugou learned about OFA, and was trying to help Deku with his training.

Again, they “hung out” because it was for a higher purpose. I also accidentally lied: The training sessions weren't one-on-one. They happened with their mutual idol All Might.

Real friends spent time with each other voluntarily for no reason, but the joy of being with each other.

I can't see Deku and Bakugou getting ice cream together. I can’t see them going to the arcade together. Except for serious hero work-related stuff, I can’t see them doing anything together one-on-one.

At no point in the story, have I ever gotten the impression that either of them wanted to spend time with each other, because they enjoyed each other's personality and company.

And why would they? Referring to my previous post on this topic: Due to their history, neither Deku nor Bakugou feels truly comfortable around the other.

For all of their inferred closeness, both hold reservations towards the other, that friends - especially best friends – shouldn’t have between each other.

While the permanent absence of one of them would spark great sorrow and rage in the other... I'd dare to say, that their presence in each other's life doesn't exactly spark joy.

...

If I had to put a label on their complicated relationship: Like I mentioned in my first post of these, I feel like Deku and Bakugou are more like siblings, that don't particularly get along, rather than friends.

Due to their chosen aspirations, Deku and Bakugou's paths became intertwined, and will probably remain so... I mean with having to watch each other almost-dying for the nth time, they are trauma bonded for life anyways.

(Even the way Bakugou yells at Deku during their training sessions, makes me think of an older brother who's truly annoyed about having to spent time tutoring their younger sibling, but doesn't want them to fail their exams. Especially since in this case, "failing exams" = getting killed by villains.)

,,,

In light of Bakugou's heavy injuries and Deku's fairly certain permanent loss of OFA (at the time of writing this post), it is uncertain, how each of their futures will look like.

Assuming that both will still become pro heroes: I think Deku and Bakugou will live and breathe each side of All Might’s legacy with each other (as well as with any of their peers proceeds on the hero path, after the war).

In such an outcome, I headcanon that Deku and Bakugou will continue to work and train together as adults. However, I don’t see them calling each other much on their days-off.

I just don't see them confiding in each other beyond anything that isn't hero stuff and/or All Might-related. I don't see them talking to each other about worries such as romantic relationship difficulties, child-rearing issues, aging parents problems, their mortgage... (well, perhaps their mortgage. I can imagine Bakugou yelling at Deku about this topic.)

Meaning, as grown-up heroes, I headcanon Deku and Bakugou doing stuff for each other like taking more of the other's workload, so that they can take care of things in their private life, when it's needed.

But when Deku needs friends, he has learned to go to Iida and Todoroki. And when Bakugou needs friends... Kirishima and Kaminari would break into his home and force their company on him.

…

As it is with a lot of families, you might care, you might even love them…

It doesn’t mean, that you want to or should be around each other more often than necessary.

Yeah, no thanks. I'd say, hardworking Pro-Hero Deku deserves relaxing days off, without somebody going off on him permanently.

[violivs]

NMTDaily: And So It Begins

- Beatrice’s first vlog! What an opening line, I love it lol. I remembered the hand wave on “hello, people of the Internet” having a wider arc across the screen than it actually does, funny enough! Glad I didn’t specify the wide wave when I referenced this line in MARRIED, the fic I posted on the 25th.

- “I’m not too old for Halloween”, girl after my own heart!

- Always thought it was interesting that Bea’s mother is American. I wonder how/why they decided that. It’s the kind of super specific detail that makes Bea feel so real, because who would make that up? It’s also interesting that it means Bea and Ben’s families are both somewhat international. Another parallel for them, another thing they have in common.

- I bet the Aunties’ wedding was the cutest thing ever, imagine Hero and Leo standing up with them! That’s probably the last time all of the Dukes were together before the story starts.

- I’m surprised Bea’s parents moved because her dad got a promotion. I would have assumed her mom did, because we get the impression of her as the high-powered businesswoman. But good for Bea’s dad. Is it canon that he’s a university professor? (Promotion = tenure?) Or did I make that up for fanfic and/or confuse him with Ben’s parents being professors in canon? Listening for that. Maybe Bea’s dad was actually also a business person all along and that’s how her parents met. Who knows.

- Bea says Australia like I say Indiana, lol (no hate to anyone from Indiana though! Just another of those inborn rivalries with the neighbor, like the Oz/NZ one.)

- “A great science program” I forgot Bea was a science person!

- I always loved the set decoration in this room, I remember it’s Hero’s room, and it’s so artsy and cozy and pretty. Love the wall art.

- “Leo and I are in charge of the house for the next six months” Excuse me, does this series really only take place over six months? Well, it ends in the first week of November, so that’s seven full months. I think it felt like it lasted a whole year when it was airing though. Time slowed down during a certain arc for sure.

- “in-joke with myself!” Classic. I kind of love that the text on screen saying “good one Beatrice” is Bea talking to herself again in-world, but out-of-world it’s kind of the Candle Wasters talking, interacting both with their own main character and with the audience. Meta.

- “Sorry my life is so boring” are like, THE famous last words for an LIW protagonist. Honey, you got a big storm coming!

- I was always so incredibly impressed with Beatrice’s independence, her comfort with leaving her parents and essentially being on her own before she even finished high school. I was alone in a college dorm hours away from home when I first watched this, second semester of freshman year if I’m not mistaken, and I could barely believe I’d managed it. I couldn’t imagine doing that any earlier than I had. I thought she was so brave and cool. I think Bea actually shows more hesitation and nervousness than I realized she did in this episode, both because she’s not used to vlogging yet and because being in a new place is nerve-wracking, but I still think she’s so brave.

- It’s so interesting that in a reversal of the play, it’s our Beatrice who comes from away to Messina to start the story, instead of Benedick and the other men returning from war. Of course, we’ll see how the boys’ arrival on the scene is modernized soon enough!

- Harriett does such a great job making you care about Bea and like her right from the start. You just want to keep listening to her talk. I can’t wait to do just that over the next seven months.

- The Benedict Cumberbatch crush is a stroke of genius, but what are the odds that there happens to be a super famous guy named Benedict that you can reference who is at peak relevance in the exact year your MAAN modernization premieres? Truly, this series as it exists could only have happened in 2014. It was the perfect time and the perfect people. What luck.

- Oh, this is the wider arc hand wave I was remembering! It’s just at the end of the video and not the beginning. Funny!

- Covering the camera with her hand and ducking out of frame at the end of her first video is a direct parallel to what Bea and Hero do in their final NMTD video, sliding out of frame and all. Love that.

- I can’t believe how much there is to talk about even with these early episodes. These posts are gonna get so long they’ll have to go under a cut for the later episodes!

💖🦩🥭

[bug-fics]

The story of us

The Lovers

CW: major character death, Mentions suicidal thoughts, substance abuse

Summary: Y/N and Ben had only been together for a year. That year was full of love and adoration. They were inseparable, it felt as though their souls were joined together the day they met. So I guess that connection explains why it was so hard to stay alive when Y/N’s beloved was 6 feet under.

Female reader | she/her pronouns

Word count: 2.5k

A/N: Set up to turn into a series based off of season 3 if people want it/if I can find inspo to write it. If you’ve read this before it’s because I posted it on a different blog when season 2 came out. I promise this is my original work, I just wiped my old blog and then missed writing again. Cross posted on AO3

The day Y/N had Ben had first met was a day like any other. That morning, on a suspiciously bright Saturday morning, Y/N woke up with a burst of euphoria, a high that couldn’t be obtained by any narcotic drug the earth could possess. Y/N knew today was going to hold something beautiful, not because she could foretell the future, no this time it was because her gut was screaming at her, trying to inform her that her life would be improved forever. She made her way out of the house, running errands for her beloved mother who had already gone off to work.

With groceries in hand, Y/N made her way down the bustling street only to come into forceful contact with a teenage boy who, by the looks of it, had been running away from six other teenagers. All seven of these teens had been dressed in eccentric outfits, school uniforms, with a familiar embroidered pattern below the collar. At that moment the realization dawned upon her, she had just physically bumped into an Umbrella Academy hero. Everyone in the city knew these teenagers, and everyone in the city also knew how they were all narcissistic, temperamental, egotistic brats.

With a huff, Y/N reached down to pick up the discarded fruit that had tumbled out of the paper grocery bag during the collision. Expecting to just walk away, Y/N was surprised when the blonde boy gripped her wrist, forcing her to confront the group.

“Well, aren’t you gonna apologize? You barrel into us and just march off with an attitude. That’s not gonna fly with me,” Y/N looked at this boy like he was stupid, getting ready to tell him off, she was interrupted by another voice. This one however, sounded like you would presume melting honey would taste. It was sweet, gorgeous even, and his words were firm yet caring. This was the voice of an angel.

“Leave her alone Luther, we all saw what happened. Klaus is the real perpetrator ike he always turns out to be. That idiot ran into her, we don’t have time to deal with this. Don’t let your hero complex go to your head,” making eye contact with the mystery boy, all of the rage rendered from Y/N’s shoulders. Soon the sensation of euphoria from this morning once again filled her body. There was something about this boy she needed in her life. Looking into his eyes was a breath of fresh air, her heart cried out to the boy without even knowing his name. When the eye contact was broken a wave of desolation washed over Y/N and she silently begged to look into the boy’s soul once again just to feel that rush of bliss swell in her body.

It was exactly 6 days, 7 hours, and 43 seconds until the two met again, this time on more favorable terms. Walking to the local sweets shop after school had become a tradition of sorts for Y/N on Fridays. Somewhat as a treat for making it through the week. Being one of the famous 42, going to high school, and being the daughter of a single mother was hard enough. Throw in predicting the future, good or bad, and you have a great ordeal of emotions. Y/N was one of the lucky ones, typically her power wasn’t disruptive, but there were some times where it was harder to get through the day. Something serious could trigger her more tremendous predictions, but this occurrence was rare. Entering the shop, Y/N was hit with the wonderful scent of sugar. Walking past the shelved walls, she began to look for something that caught her eye, that was until she heard a very familiar voice. This voice was one that hadn't left her mind since Saturday. His black eyes were the only thing she could think about the past week.

“Klaus! You’re going to get us in trouble again. I’m tired of always making up lies to save your sorry ass.”

Looking away from the sweet adjourned walls, Y/N searched across the store, trying to pinpoint exactly where the mystery boy was. That’s when their eyes met for the second time ever. The same rush of euphoria had started to flow through Y/N’s veins. There was something about this boy, that she had never once spoken a word around, and Y/N yet she knew she needed him in her life. Deciding not to waste this precious moment, Y/N had begun to march her way up to the brunette haired boy. It felt as though her legs were moving on their own, and soon she was filled with a wave of regret and despair; pleading with her body to stop walking until it was too late.

Here she stood, nearly toe to toe with a boy she had never officially met before, with absolutely no game plan. These first words were dire, first impressions were everything and she couldn’t fuck it up.

“Hi.”

That was what her brain had come up with? Hi, of all things. She didn’t even state her name. There was no mention of a thank you for last week, no nice to meet you, no true conversation starter. The only thing that escaped her lips was hi? Y/N’s brain began to stir. Thoughts of paranoia and fear entered and exited her mind without any time to truly process the words. Seconds felt like hours as the pair stood in deafening silence. At least, that’s what it felt like for the y/h/c girl. All the thoughts abruptly stopped when she caught sight of his smile. With a dazed grin, Ben replied with the same energy Y/N had used to make her grand impression.

"Hey," Snapping out of the trance, Ben tried to redeem himself with a decent conversation. Being who he was, he had never been good with words, let alone with pretty girls. "Oh, um I remember you. God, I'm sorry for how Luther was behaving that day. He’s always been such a prick ever since we’ve grown more popular. Crap, you probably don’t even know who we are. Um, I’m Ben, by the way, Ben Hargreeves,” A chuckle escaped the teen’s lips once he realized he was rambling. The day the two made eye contact, Ben had felt as though the darkness that filled him was relieved even just for a second. “Sorry.”

There was something eerily comforting with the boy in front of her. Something about him felt like home. It made her feel warm inside and this was quite terrifying to think about when you realize that Y/N had only met this boy twice. She sent him a smile back, “I know who you are. You're a part of the Umbrella Academy. Though I always assumed you were all just a bunch of egotistical assholes,” this sentence gave Ben a little shock, he wanted to make a good impression on this girl. He didn't know why, but he felt the need to get to know her. With a slight smirk, Y/N continues her train of thought. “ Don’t worry though, you're too pretty to be an asshole in my book.”

Ever since that day Y/N and Ben were stuck together like glue. There was something that drew the two in and neither of them would have it any other way. It didn’t take long for Ben to fall for his new friend. He had spent years being a part of a group, he was just one of 7. He was a monster, a hero, a celebrity. However in Y/N’s eyes, he was just Ben; loving, funny, dorky Ben. She made him feel special, she made him feel accepted, acknowledged. She was someone he could turn to for any problem he had, no matter how tragic or minuscule. She made time for him, put in equal effort to be with him. She let him ramble about his newest interest and she smiled and engaged in the conversation even if she had no clue what he was talking about. She didn't expect the most from him. The two could just sit in her room for hours doing absolutely nothing and still be the happiest they’ve ever been. It was a bond so powerful that nothing could turn the other away.

Their romance was simple, it was full of love, passion, and understanding. It was beautiful and abundant. When they kissed it was full of emotion and desire. Without the other, their lungs ran cold, their minds were screaming, and their souls felt empty. When they embraced it felt as though all the world's problems were solved. It felt as if their bodies became one, molding perfectly together. Without the other, the world seemed grey, cold, and barren. It was just a teenage romance, but at the same time, it was so much more. They were never apart, always touching in some way or another. Even Ben’s siblings could tell how deep their fondness of one and another truly was. Ben had always been a reserved kid, always obeying the rules, following one of the siblings around like a lost puppy. Y/N made him feel free, she helped him branch out and have fun. It was new and exciting and it was no surprise that over the year they only grew more in love.

It was evident that the two were going to get married. They were going to live a beautiful life together, start a family, have a nice picket fenced house. They were supposed to grow old together and live life to the fullest, hand in hand. They were supposed to be together forever. That was the plan, but plans get destroyed. The day the world lost Ben Hargreevs was a day of despair and endeavor. A family was ripped apart, a girlfriend was now bereaved, and many hearts were destroyed.

As a prophet, Y/N knew today was going to be a bad day. A vision of pools of blood flashed through her mind this morning, leaving a feeling of dread upon her shoulder. Rushing to the Hargreeves’ manor, Y/N had a whirlwind of emotions flying through her brain. Someone would get hurt, someone may already be hurt, or worse someone could be dead.

Slamming the large doors of the building open, Y/N was met with quiet. No loud cries from the creaky floorboards, no sounds of fighting teens, just a thick feeling of death and sorrow lingered in the air.

“Hello!” Calling out to the empty house, Y/N was met with the soft padded footsteps of Allison, who had a solemn look upon her face. At that moment, Y/N knew something was wrong, and when she was led to the room holding her dead boyfriend's body her world came crashing down too quickly for her to handle. The girl was sent into shock, and her body gave out. Her heart slowed and the world became black. All the signs of a broken heart.

---------------

Ever since Ben’s death, Y/N had suffered greatly. Her brain was full of horrifying thoughts and she soon resorted to alcohol to ease the pain. Most people would look at this as an excuse for attention, she and Ben had only been teenagers, barley together for a year. His death should have caused her pain, but not to this degree. While this should have been the case, everyone knew that what she and Ben had was deeper than a highschool romance. It was bigger than any one of them could fully understand. They were bound together. They were always meant to be together, whether it was in this life or another.

As time went on and the years flashed by, the only source of serotonin Y/N had, were the days that Klaus would come over. Not because his company brought her happiness, but because on those days Ben could be with her. He could sit next to her, lay with her as she cried, and he could listen to the horrid thoughts in her brain, allowing her to rant to the one person who could understand her. Today was one of those days. Klaus was raiding Y/N’s kitchen and watching television while she and Ben were stowed away in her bedroom. Even though Y/N couldn’t see, feel, or hear him, she knew he was there, she knew he was listening and in confidence, she spilled her heart out to him.

“I don’t want to do this without you anymore. I know deep in my core that maybe, I wasn’t supposed to live through the heartbreak all those years ago. Maybe it's time I said goodbye and came to join you forever. I know it's selfish of me, I know I shouldn’t… but maybe, just maybe I can be happy again if I was with you,” Y/N took a deep breath forcing back the sobs threatening to escape her lips as she continued talking to the air around her, “It won’t be hard either, there are so many solutions to my problem. So many ways out of this world. So many ways to say goodbye.”

Y/N knew these were all empty thoughts. She knew that it would go against everything Ben had believed in. He’d want her to move on, to try and make a name for herself as she had always planned on doing. He’d want her to be happy, but how could she be happy without him in her everyday life. She tried every day to fight through the pain, to survive in order to make Ben feel content. Y/N tried to get a good job, maintain social interactions, and even do good in the world. No matter how hard she tried though, she could help but feel so empty inside.

The love of her life was gone, they never got to live in their dream house out of the city. They never got to have the kids they always dreamed of having, and they never got to have the beautiful wedding ceremony they wanted to have. Ben hadn’t even proposed to her and yet they already had a wedding planned out, from the seating arrangement to the appetizers. Y/N had even picked out her dream dress. It was silly at the time, but now she yearned for Ben’s touch. She wanted to wake up from this horrible nightmare, to be seventeen again hanging out in Ben’s childhood bedroom. Y/N was fortunate enough to even be allowed back in the Hargreeve’s manor long after Ben’s death. She would spend hours at his grave, in his bed, wearing his clothes. No matter how much she spent with his belongings it was never enough to fill the void in her soul.

She was alone, broken, and nothing could fix her

[nspwriteups]

Pehla Nasha | Kundavai x Vanthiyathevan OS (Modern AU)

A/N:This had been sitting in my drafts for weeks... finally found the confidence to post it. Happy reading 😊

Kundavai = Keerthana , Vanthiyathevan= Vaishnav, Aditha = Adithya and Arulmozhi= Amal

Keerthana stood at the return section of the public library, glancing at the news channel in the tv mounted on the wall. She waited for the staff to return her library cards and made her way to the book section. She scanned the stacks for the book she had been searching for weeks. It was too boring for her to use the Web Opac on the library computer to get the book of her choosing. She preferred searching through the long rows of paperback until an interesting title or an attractive book cover caught her attention. But try as she may, she wasn't able to find THAT book yet. She looked around for a minute. Maybe because it was almost noon or maybe it's because it was a Sunday, there were only two people in the book reference section there - she and another guy,who seems to be in his own world - whistling an unrecognisable song and staring at the books ahead of him with hands in his pocket. She was again too lazy to go all the way over to the staff section to enquire and so she briefly glimpsed at the seemingly oblivious guy again. Her friends always called her out on her introverted nature. She wasn't really introverted, she just preferred to listen and observe others over talking non stop. She slowly walked over and tapped the guy's shoulder. He was taller than her and when he turned around she noticed his brown eyes meet hers in a look of confusion and curiosity. 

"Hello. I was wondering if you know where I can find Kalki's Ponniyin Selvan novels?" She put on her friendliest smile and politest tone. He looked around for a moment before turning back to her with an embarrassing expression. "I am not the library staff.. I'm just browsing books like you" 

She knew that. Of course she knew that but still she couldn't help but feel awkward all of a sudden. Maybe he noticed it because he quickly added "But I have time to kill. I can help you find the book". She gave a quick nod and together they went to the Tamil literature section and started digging from the opposite sections. As she searched, she couldn't help checking out her helper of the hour - his olive green jacket fitted him well and his entire body language gave him a laid back demeanor. He looked like a Wattpad male lead character with his tall frame, boyish outfit, silver chain peeking out of his jacket collar and striking brown eyes. She saw him turning slightly to look in her direction and quickly turned her attention to the books in front her. Get a hold of yourself Keerthana! She thought to herself.You are a research scholar for God's Sake! Don't act like an infatuated teenager. Keerthana prided herself in being clever, practical and disciplined -  a complete opposite to her brothers who were prone to spontaneity. Even though her friends teased her for shooing away even the slightest chance of a relationship coming her way, she never told them the real reason she wasn't willing to give her heart away. She had her moments of checking out the cute guys she met now and then (like now for instance) but deep down she was waiting for a romcom version of love - an unexpected meeting followed by a series of chance encounters until the hero says something like "You have Bewitched me body and soul" (She absolutely loved Pride and Prejudice) - that was her secret, that behind her calm,composed and strategic facade was a girl yearning for a silly and magical romance. She was snapped out of her thoughts with a book waving in front of her."Found it" He declared with a grin. She smiled and said "Thanks a lot. You were such a great help". It was true, he was such a friendly person."How can I not help someone as beautiful as you" He replied with a smirk. Huh, friendly and flirty then. "I am Vaishnav. And you are?""I'm Keerthana" She said as she made her way to the book issue section. He caught up with her easily, a book called Exploring the World tucked in his arms. So a wattpad-ish looking person with a love for reading travelogue? This guy seems to be the dream vision of many of the reader girls out there. "Keerthana as in Keerthana Viswanath? Adithya's sister?" He asked and Keerthana stopped on hearing her older brother's name. "Yes. How do you know?""I'm in the same football team as him. He always talk about you and your brother Amal. It's so nice to finally meet you" He said with the same grin as before, looking at her amusingly. Aah, so that must be why she felt a familiarity with him. They exited the library together, both unintentionally walking at a snail's pace, engrossed in their conversation. She learnt that his favourite colour is green, aspired to become a travel writer and was best friends with her brother. He got to know that she was a bookworm with a love for classics, loved boat rides and was as impressive as her brother. They faced each other once they reached the parking lot.

"So.." He began, not knowing what to say despite the fact that he prided himself in being a sweet-talker.

"So..." She also initiated, feeling the awkwardness climbing back up

"I hope I can see you around. Maybe another encounter at the library? " He joked

"We'll see" She joined in on the joke, with a playful smile and a thumping heart.

Later, when she was in her room, already pages deep in the first book of the Ponniyin Selvan series, she imagined him to be Vallavaraiyan Vanthiyathevan and herself to be Ilaiya Piratti Kundavai. Because she couldn't picture anyone else to be the flirty and enthusiastic Vana Kula Ilavarase. And the more she imagined, the more she felt as if maybe there is something about this boy that is pulling her towards him, a sort of feeling that somehow he will come into her life as more than Adithya's best friend. She placed a hand over her heart beating faster than usual at the thought of such a possibility. "Silly heart" she whispered with a soft giggle.

@ramcharanobsessed @dumdaradumdaradum @vibishalakshman @harinishivaa @hollogramhallucination @kovaipaavai@rang-lo. @willkatfanfromasia@thelekhikawrites@thegleamingmoon@deafeningflowercat@yehsahihai@whippersnappersbookworm@itsfookingloosah@gemsmusings@chiyaanvikram@elvenladysakura. @matka-kulfi. @madatdisney@bumblebeeskywalker@vahnithedreamer@nkarti@dosai-maavu@utterlynotperfect@winter-birds@happy-bookworm @tumbledout @anabanana4115 @freeunknownwasteland @bhataktiatmacore@rapunzels-stuff@celestesinsight@mairablue@rationalelderberry@existenceiswhateven@arachneofthoughts@spider5884fan11 @cara-2003 @nirmohi-premika @stella12

[cosmicjoke]

You gotta’ love how some people are totally dismissing this entire, hour long epic episode of “Attack on Titan” as trash because Levi’s eyebrows didn’t look sad enough in some scenes.  Talk about the definition of nitpicking.

These animators at MAPPA and the entire crew from the sound design to the musical score to the direction and voice acting worked their asses off to bring this final arc to life, and all some of ya’ll got is “Levi looks too angry in his scenes!”.  Come ON.  

I feel like this is the same complaint we’ve been getting with people about Levi in the anime for years, complaining that the anime makes Levi seem somehow less compassionate and heroic than in the manga because his face isn’t expressive enough.  I mean, first of all, one of Levi’s defining characteristics is that he usually has a flat or stoic expression.  He’s not very, outwardly emotive as a person.  But I watched the anime before I ever read the manga, and I knew within the first few minutes of Levi’s introduction that he was meant to be seen as the classic hero of the series, and that impression only became more and more reinforced as the series went on.  I never thought of Levi as emotionless or uncaring or cold, because it was always obvious that he wasn’t.  Because it was obvious to me that Levi’s compassion is and always has been in his actions.  He doesn’t make big, exaggerated expressions with his features.  He doesn’t have big, expressive eyes.  Shit, he smiles exactly ONE TIME in the whole series.  One freakin’ time.  He cries exactly one time too.  He only ever shows real anger or intensity when he’s in the middle of a combat situation, and even then, most of the time, his expression is pretty neutral.

That’s not to say Isayama’s art didn’t do a better overall job of conveying Levi’s emotions within his eyes.  Of course it did.  Isayama always captured a kind of subtle sadness in Levi’s expression that’s hard to convey exactly BECAUSE it was so subtle (a testament to the fact that Isayama is a better artist than he’s given credit for). Again, Levi’s expressions were never exaggerated or elastic or grand.   At times he simply looks exhausted or dejected.  His face never crumples in agony though, or lines in intense grief or pain.  That’s just the way Levi is.  He’s a man of actions, not words or gestures.  

I just think it’s stupid to dismiss this entire episode, which obviously had so many people’s blood, sweat and tears poured into it, with great passion and love for the source material, all because you don’t think Levi looked sad enough in some of the scenes.  Levi is OBVIOUSLY sad.   He’s obviously heartbroken.  And there’s plenty of scenes where we do see his face lined in pain and grief.  

Levi was never a character who had to announce to the world how much he cared through grand gestures and big displays of emotion.  It was always in the ways he acted, the actions he took, the choices he made, which showed us how much he felt for everyone around him.  His manner has always been gruff and blunt and some might even say rude, but it was always evident, at least to me, that it was nothing but a cover, laid in place to conceal the most kind and compassionate heart.

[oldfashionedbooklove]

tell me about your favorite lm montgomery novel please <3

Okay this is SO hard because her books are amazing but I just have to admit Rilla of Ingleside is my favourite, which is saying a lot because I LOVE HER BOOKS, okay! I adore the Story Girl duology and I absolutely love the Anne series and Jane of Lantern Hill.

But Rilla. This book is a heartbreaker. And it’s so beautiful.

I don’t know if I can fully express how much is to be found in this book. I have been reading it yearly for many years, and always come away with new thoughts. As I grow older, and see more of the world, I relate and understand more, and another level of the book is discovered.

The setting—a small P.E.I. town carrying on through WWI. I’m pretty tough when it comes to war books, but I have to take breaks from this one because it is so raw and real. The agony is intense. I cannot even cry over it—my heart hurts too much for tears. This shows exactly what the Great War was for people. You sway back and forth, feeling the dread and terror. You know how it ends but you are broken anyhow. And when the end comes, you too can only rejoice softly. You feel as if you have paid part of the price yourself.

“‘We’re in a new world,’ Jem says, ‘and we’ve got to make it a better one than the old. That isn’t done yet, though some folks seem to think it ought to be. The job isn’t finished—it isn’t really begun. The old world is destroyed and we must build up the new one. It will be the task of years. I’ve seen enough of war to realize that we’ve got to make a world where wars can’t happen. We’ve given Prussianism its mortal wound but it isn’t dead yet and it isn’t confined to Germany either. It isn’t enough to drive out the old spirit—we’ve got to bring in the new.’”

The characters in this book—they are alive. Splendid Jem, brave and merry and true; Jerry, steady and dutiful; Walter, sensitive and courageous; Carl, cheerful and fearless; Shirley, honest and reliable; Nan and Di and Anne, all heart-wrung and smiling; Gertrude, tragic and grasping for hope; the Doctor, determined and self-sacrificing; Susan, simple and true—and Rilla, who starts out a silly, frivolous girl and ends a strong, mature woman. Then there are all the minor and side characters—the Merediths, Cousin Sophia, Jimsy, Ken, Irene, Whiskers-on-the-Moon & his family, Mary and the Elliotts, Norman + Ellen, and everyone else. They’re all so alive, so real, so funny and terrible and beautiful—I swear Glen St. Mary exists and all the inhabitants thereof.

The story follows the Great War, from the first days in August 1914 to the bitter Summer of 1919, where peace has come but normal will never return. As a child, this story was simply World War One—a faraway, long-ago grief and horror and agony. Now, in 2022, as a woman, I have experienced a slight taste of what the people of 1914 felt, and it has humanized the story of the War. This, more than any other book I have read, brings the War and the world of 1914-1918 to life, showing how they were people just like us. The heart is wrung by their suffering, and there is no escape, for the war must drag on for long bitter years. And the price! Walter has become the face of unknown, forgotten heroes, and Jem has become that of the scarred heroes who returned. Every November we grieve the young men who never came home, and for the ones who came home missing a part of themselves, physical or otherwise. I have wept thinking of the children of Rilla, Ken, Faith, Jem, and the others—children who fought in WWII and whose parents were forced to relive the horrible conflict of mankind.

“It has been such a dreadful week,” she wrote, “and even though it is over and we know that it was all a mistake that does not seem to do away with the bruises left by it. And yet it has in some ways been a very wonderful week and I have had some glimpses of things I never realized before—of how fine and brave people can be even in the midst of horrible suffering.”

And yet the book overflows with humour—real laugh-out-loud scenes and witty, clever banter on princes and politics. It is another aspect of the humanity—the part that cannot fully let go of laughing despite the drain. Another angle is the shrewd commentary on principalities and powers, nations and cultures, is thought-provoking, as is the remarks that show us how the war truly changed the world.

“There was a time,” she said sorrowfully, “when I did not care what happened outside of P.E. Island, and now a king cannot have a toothache in Russia or China but it worries me. It may be broadening to the mind, as the doctor said, but it is very painful to the feelings.”

But the biggest things to me is the SPIRIT of this book. The spirit of perseverance, endurance, courage, and love. Of course, man is man, and there is suspicion, contempt, and a feeling of superiority—but this is not exclusive only to Anglo-Saxons. As someone who isn’t Anglo-Saxon myself, and actually of mixed cultures, I can attest every nation is guilty of such. World War One was a battle of good vs. evil—not of man vs. man, but Idea against Idea—the idea of civilization against militarism. Perhaps not on the part of the leaders—but when one studies the writings, letters, poems, and speeches of the everyday folks caught up in the war, one sees this distinction plainly. It was not a war of European against European, Anglo-Saxon against German—it was a war between an old, terrible Idea of Prussianism (Frederick the Great, anyone?) and the Idea of Respect and Peace.

“And you will tell your children of the Idea we fought and died for—teach them it must be lived for as well as died for, else the price paid for it will have been given for nought.”

May we never forget.

A REMARK: I discovered that Rilla of Ingleside was abridged by about 4,300 words (~14 pages), so I searched for an unabridged copy. I definitely encourage you to take the extra trouble to find an *unabridged* copy. It is SO worth it! I’ve read both versions and the unabridged is so much fuller, with a great deal more humour and fun.

I just have to pick out my favourite quotes, too…

“We all come back to God in these days of soul-sifting,” said Gertrude to John Meredith. “There have been many days in the past when I didn't believe in God—not as God—only as the impersonal Great First Cause of the scientists. I believe in Him now—I have to—there's nothing else to fall back on but God—humbly, starkly, unconditionally.”

“‘Our help in ages past’—‘the same yesterday, to-day and for ever,’ said the minister gently. ‘When we forget God—He remembers us.’”

Below her [window] was a big apple-tree, a great swelling cone of rosy blossom.... Beyond Rainbow Valley there was a cloudy shore of morning with little ripples of sunrise breaking over it. The far, cold beauty of a lingering star shone above it. Why, in this world of springtime loveliness, must hearts break?

And I can’t leave without some humour:

“‘The Germans have recaptured Premysl,’ said Susan despairingly… ‘and now I suppose we will have to begin calling it by that uncivilized name again. Cousin Sophia was in when the mail came and when she heard the news she hove a sigh up from the depths of her stomach, Mrs. Dr. dear, and said, ‘Ah yes, and they will get Petrograd next I have no doubt.’ I said to her, ‘My knowledge of geography is not so profound as I wish it was but I have an idea that it is quite a walk from Premysl to Petrograd.’ Cousin Sophia sighed again and said, ‘The Grand Duke Nicholas is not the man I took him to be.’ ‘Do not let him know that,’ said I. ‘It might hurt his feelings and he has likely enough to worry him as it is.’ But you cannot cheer Cousin Sophia up, no matter how sarcastic you are, Mrs. Dr. dear. She sighed for the third time and groaned out, ‘But the Russians are retreating fast,’ and I said, ‘Well, what of it? They have plenty of room for retreating, have they not?’ But all the same, Mrs. Dr. dear, though I would never admit it to Cousin Sophia, I do not like the situation on the eastern front. [But] Grand Duke Nicholas, though he may have been a disappointment to us in some respects, knows how to run away decently and in order, and that is a very useful knowledge when Germans are chasing you. Norman Douglas declares he is just luring them on and killing ten of them to one he loses. But I am of the opinion he cannot help himself and is just doing the best he can under the circumstances, the same as the rest of us.’”

[oswlld]

oswlld's monthly wrap up: january

note: i am trying something a bit different this year, so bear with me as i figure out how i want to format this. i wanted to spend more time sharing what i consume, beyond what i rb, and put my thoughts in one place. these posts are okay to rb

--

The Fifth Season, N.K. Jemisin [started 11/03, finished 01/23] This was originally a dnf from 2023 that i decided to pick up again. My entry point into her work was The City We Became and fell in love with her voice. With Fifth Season, however, I felt like I loved parts of the story but didn’t fall in love with the sum of the whole. I will go more into why in the tags because it will touch on spoilers (mildly!) I still gave it 4⭐️ in storygraph. — The Moth Presents: All These Wonders, Catherine Burns [started 01/05, finished 01/31] I bought this collection from Half Price so long ago, I’ve forgotten what drew me in. Probably because of the Neil Gaiman foreword. I had not heard of The Moth so I went into this blind. Some of the stories made me wish I heard it live and feel the story breathe and beat with the audience. 4.25⭐️ in storygraph.

Flavorful Origins, Netflix [started: 09/28, finished 01/04] I watched s1/s2 in 2023 at various pts of the fall/winter. Finally wrapped up s3 in January and caught up. Unsure if its a complete series or ongoing, but I do hope to return to the series in the future if they do upload more seasons. This series reminds me of the YT channel Liziqi, where they take one ingredient and unravel the techniques and related dishes by region. A great palate cleanser amongst all the other shows I typically gravitate towards. — Last Twilight, GMMTV on YT [started 11/10, finished 01/26] The only show I watched in real time, as it premiered week by week. If I solely focus on the January episodes, for the sake of this post, I can’t say I was happy with the way the final act was handled. If I look back on the whole of it, it’s still really special to me. In fact, there are episodes that still stand as the very best in television, THE BEST. Still licking the wounds inflicted by the finale, though. — Moving, Hulu [started 01/08, finished 01/30] This lured me in by process of dash osmosis, which is the very best brand of entry pt. I am O B S E S S E D with this show, I am singing its praises! It soothed the scars left by the show Heroes. Amongst all the action sequences, espionage, and high school drama is this huge heart beating loud and strong. Lee Mihyun, the way I love youuuuu, the character you are 🤌🏼🤌🏼🤌🏼 Guys, she saved January for me.

Chevalier, Hulu [watched on 01/14] The short runtime (well, short for the current landscape of cinema) did give me pause. I think some of the emotional beats could have been deepened if given 20 more min of his involvement in the rebellion. I think I wanted the betrayal to really cut me to the bone, but it felt like a papercut. — BlacKkKlansman [watched on 1/31] At this point, I would follow John David Washington’s career to the very end. I love his natural charisma. I want to see him go thru alllll the situations and wish this movie gave him a lot more room to breathe. Laura Harrier took me by surprise, portraying the BSU president Patrice. The story came to a very mild end and felt very tame, but the suspense held its own.

Stick Season (We’ll All Be Here Forever), Noah Kahan [first time listening] I originally learned about him when I was in my Lizzy McAlpine hyperfixation last year and heard she was a feature in one of his songs. And then I discovered a duet Noah did with Hozier and knew I had to spend time this month to sit down and really digest his album. WHOA MAN, this is one of those formative moments when music perfectly aligns with my current state of being. Take that as you will. Current top 5: Come Over, Strawberry Wine, Northern Attitude, Halloween, Your Needs My Needs — Natasha, Pierre, & the Great Comet of 1812 [relistening] what else is there to say, this is a mandatory yearly listen when it becomes below 0 outside. When I saw this show live, it was a January date as well so this relisten really got me spiralling. These two albums got me Feeling 🧍🏻‍♀️ on my walks.

Minecraft [game, on Switch] I got this game as a christmas gift and was where I spend most of my waking hours outside of work. I enjoyed watch MC streams on twitch and knew I would enjoy playing on my own. I get it now, I am soooooo late to this game. I think and dream Minecraft. My mountain house and harbor builds? Immaculate. They basic, but immaculate. Now I’m in my fishing era, esp when I have Stick Season playing in the background (nothing else mattered when the sun was rising and the song The View Between Villages played in the bg, it was a religious experience). — Lethal Company [game, on Twitch/YT] My entire month has been hopping from one stream to another, lobby after lobby. This game is so fun to watch and witness how all the mods evolved as time went on. I don’t think I myself would play the game myself, as I am a bit of a scaredy cat, but watching my fav groups play has been a highlight.

[mermaidsirennikita]

Weekly Book Recs: 12/8/23-12/15/23

The Fake Mate by Lana Ferguson

Omegaverse has gone mainstream, babes! In so many ways, this is a normal contemporary romcom (but in a good way). They're both doctors; he's grumpy, she's sunshiney; they both have semi-ludicrous reasons for needing a fake partner. But while she needs a fake boyfriend to ward off her grandmother's nagging, he needs a fake mate to dispel the notion that he can't be trusted because he's been outed as an ALPHA. And oops, she's an omega. There's knotting. There's animalistic urges taking over logic (my GOD is there ever, and it is amazing). There is slick (and boy is he into it). And also, there is sex at work on the couch. I had a fabulous time with this one.

When a Duke Loves a Woman by Lorraine Heath

I'm not necessarily a big fan of "tomboy" romances, typically. But this one is so sweet, and honestly largely a character piece (there isn't a ton of Big Plot). A lower-class tavern owner who's barely acknowledged her femininity--not due to gender, but due to pressure and fear of "sin"--meets a duke who frankly is good at nothing besides sex. It's rare that a flop hero really, really works for me, and here he does. Because he's a flop, but he's her flop. A heroine-first book that's all about allowing vulnerability and tenderness into your life.

The Scoundrel in Her Bed by Lorraine Heath

As I say always, I am a sucker for second chance romances, and I just devoured this one within the space of like... 48 hours during the work week. The heady young love Lavinia and Finn feel (they gave each other their flowers!!!) is so real, but what makes it even better is the fact that they both change deeply during their eight years apart, and have to fall in love as the people they are now. That is INTENSE. There's a lot of heartache, a lot of acceptance, and a lot of hard decisions. It's not easy for these two to find their way back to each other, but it's absolutely worth the journey. And reader: I cried. Not just one tear, either. Hot, borderline painful, "streaking down my face" tears. It was a lot.

Mafia Virgin by Mila Finelli

I've yet to experience mafia books I've loved quite as much as Mila's--she just captures a level of camp and heat and actual genuine emotion that I don't think a lot of people can. Mafia Virgin was arguably the gentlest book in the series--if you love a good "killer who is secretly a softie/nerdy girl" pairing, this is it. If you like a breeding kink book (as I do) this is also... it. (The amount of times he takes a picture of her pussy right after coming inside her... chef's kiss.) It's fun, it has great cameos from previous leads, it's extremely sexy, and ultimately? It has a heart. Love it.