#I actually had an o that another person was fully responsible for

[becca-e-barnes]

BECCA THESE SUBBY DBF!BUCKY THOTS ARE KILLING ME IN THE BEST WAY I LOVE IT SO MUCH😩😵‍💫🤤

Coming back to this because my weakness is submissive older men 🤤

Just the thought of clamping your hands around his neck while you're on top and watching him lose it makes me dizzy.

I absolutely love the thought of fucking yourself on him, grinding your hips back and forth with his length inside you while he whimpers and moans beneath you.

He's surrendered all the control he's ever had. You both know that it'd take very little effort if he decided he wanted to change the dynamic but he has no interest in doing that.

He wants you on top of him, using him for your own pleasure rather than his. He wants you to leave scratches down his chest where your nails have sunk into his skin. He wants flushed, stinging cheeks, reminding him of each little slap you've given him when his eyes flutter shut and he stops looking at you for even a few seconds.

But then one of your hands cups his neck and that feels like an entirely different kind of submission. It's not a painful sensation that he expects when he imagines being submissive in bed; it's dizzying. The light pressure on his neck is delightful but more than anything, it feels like you're fully in control. He's vulnerable like this and he loves it.

"Both hands. Please." He's never sounded so needy and any hesitation you might have felt a few seconds ago melts away. Your other hand joins the first, wrapped around his neck, your fingers squeezing slightly and he looks entirely blissed out underneath you.

"Oh fuck." He groans, thrusting his hips up towards you in a desperate attempt to make sure he's buried as deep inside you as he can manage.

"You're fucking pathetic like this." You tease, adjusting your grip on his neck to remind him exactly where your hands are. You feel his pulse under your fingers and you feel your body flutter at the realisation. "You're losing yourself in me, aren't you?"

His eyes close for a few seconds while he tries to focus on the sensation, rather than the sight of you but that won't do. You take one hand from his neck, slapping his face gently and the rush he feels from the release of pressure is euphoric.

"Did I say you could look away?" You tease, putting your hand back on his throat, keeping your grip tight while he shakes his head.

His hands land on your hips, helping you grind back and forth on him, rubbing his length right where you need it. He probably won't get off like this but you absolutely could.

"I want to feel you cum. I need you to squeeze my neck and my cock at the same time." He's fantasised about this and it shows.

"Make me." You were half joking but he starts working your hips faster, setting the pace he knows you like until he stops suddenly, holding your hips still.

"God, I can't cum yet. I don't want this to end." You forgive him this time for closing his eyes, giving him a moment to collect himself before he's back to fucking you on him, begging you to squeeze his neck harder.

[toastedkiwi]

Bastard Child Outline

Pairing: Chris Evans x Bastard Child/Daughter!Reader

A/n: this shit has been sitting in my drafts for like three years and a year in my queue so it wouldn’t get lost in my drafts. I’ve decided I’ll just post it because I honestly don’t know if I’ll ever actually write the parts. So this is for those who were holding out hope. I’m sorry to disappoint. (Also, some bits and parts might be triggering for those who’ve dealt with abuse and self harm.) it’s long too. Not at all perfect either.

Born 1999 in Hawaii.

Mom, Emily Reed, had you when she was 15 and Chris was 16. She’s a decent person and obviously got married to surgeon. They had kids. Stepdad, Dr. Issac Reed, is a decent guy but works a lot. You’d never be his kid however. He made sure you were alright but he never had the connection with you as much as that sucked. It happens.

Your grandpa was stationed in Boston when your mom and dad got together. They had a huge fight and another girl was caught with her lips on his right before she moved with her family to Hawaii.

At 11, you start a YouTube channel under the name xXBOSLEYXx (named after your grandpa’s dog) and start posting covers since you love music. (2010)

At 12, you audition for a role in Hawaii Five-O. You get it and end up being a kidnapped kid that they have to find. It leads more people to your YouTube channel. (2011)

At 13, you go to LA by yourself since your mom had just given birth. Your aunt who’s a publicist gets you signed to a record deal along with a manager by the name of Marie Trevor. It’s decided that you’ll be known as BOSLEY. (2012)

You end up moving to LA. You record some singles which is received amazingly. You easily rise to the ranks especially with the help of some modeling gigs and acting gigs.

At 14, your mom doesn’t approve anymore as you’re gaining fame and your dad is getting bigger than ever. You get into a huge argument. She pretty much drops you as her child and your aunt is responsible of you. You drop an album. (2013)

At 15, You stop smiling for pictures which becomes signature of BOSLEY. You’re offered a small role in The Bronze getting to tell Lance Tucker to fuck off in a moving car. You happily take it and managed to befriend the actor. (2014)

At 16, You’re fully doing music and touring. School is pretty much dropped. You find that your boyfriend knocked you up. You want your mom but she won’t pick up. You end up having a miscarriage while on touring. You’re given a day to grieve and the next you have to continue on. You also perform at Kylie Jenner’s birthday party. You end up becoming good friends with the Jenner sisters which gets you more fame. You got another role playing Peter Parker’s neighbor and his second best friend. (2015)

At 17, you perform on SNL with Scarlett Johansson as the host. You release another album which kicks off another tour after you finish filming Spiderman: Homecoming. Tom Holland actually invites you to the Civil War premier and you join him. Sebastian hugs you tightly when he sees you. You don’t meet your dad. (2016)

At 18, rumors spark that you’ll be taking over the mantel as Captain America as filming for Infinity War starts. You start getting compared to Chris Evans as if it’s a fair comparison. There’s also rumors that you two might be related. You also start dating this actor, Max Wess. You attend the Spiderman premier with him. (2017)

At 19, your birth certificate is leaked.

Chris freaks out over the news. He knows your mom. He remembers her and the last night they shared together before she left without another word.

Your boyfriend ends up beating the shit out of you which one of your friends finds you barely alive and calls you an ambulance. This happens in your LA home. It’s a huge story.

Chris gets in contact with your aunt Jamie Y/l/n and she happily helps him sneak into the hospital without paparazzi catching him. He ends up sitting in the chair close to your bedside waiting for you to wake up if you ever will. He expects Emily to come. She doesn’t.

You wake up in a panic and Chris’ face is what you first see. He’s the one to tell that you’re okay and you’re safe. You learn that your jaw is wired shut. Your ribs are broken. You’re missing a kidney. You had a lot of internal bleeding. Your right hand is busted and took many screws and rods to fix. You’re definitely worried about your career especially when you found out that they had to slit your throat and put a tube in it. Your dad luckily distracts you and is sure to not bring up your mother since he’s been warned by Jamie.

“I’m really wondering how you got BOSLEY from Y/n,” Chris said.

You tapped on the keyboard of his iPad using your left index finger as he holds it for you. Chris can’t help but chuckle.

“He really named all his dogs Bosley?”

You nod and your grandpa said, “it’s a strong name.”

You turned head seeing the old man and Chris hasn’t seen him in two decades. You haven’t seen him in a good 3 years. Your grandmother heads to you easily freaking out over how you look but Chris knows you looked a lot worse. He wants to so badly ask why they didn’t tell him about you. They surely should’ve known. But he doesn’t for your sake.

“You don’t have to stay, Christopher,” your grandpa said.

Chris moves to stand up but you grasp his hand. You give the nastiest glare to your grandfather.

“Is she even gonna come?” You hissed through the wires. You aren’t supposed to try and use your voice.

“Honey,” your grandmother said. “She’s gotta look after the kids.”

You rolled your eyes and Chris could see the tears start to form. Your heart is beating faster on the monitor. He’s just as mad as you. Are you really not that important to her? If you aren’t, why didn’t she just give him you? He without would’ve taken you in and loved like a parent should.

You wave off the hands and swat them away. Tears streamed down your cheeks. You yanked out the leads as the monitor started to beep louder. It ends up showing that you’ve flatlined. You try kicking off the blankets.

“Hey, Bubba,” Chris said but you aren’t listening.

He ends up wrapping his arms around you. He takes the hits you give him. It’s heartbreaking to watch especially when you give up and cry as he held you. Nurses and doctors rushed in.

“She’s okay,” your grandpa informed as Chris comforts you as a parent should.

Once you fall back asleep with the help of some sedatives, your dad pulls your grandparents outside of your room.

“Where the fuck is Emily? Why isn’t she here? It’s clear Y/n wants her,” Chris said.

“Let’s go somewhere more private,” Lucille suggested.

Chris ends up taking them to his place after running into Tom Holland and Zendaya who are obviously there to visit you. He informs them that you’re asleep but it’d be fine for them to stop by and have them watch over you.

“They got into a huge fight over Y/n becoming BOSLEY,” your grandma said before her husband could speak. “Emily couldn’t handle it. She still holds a lot against you and she didn’t want you meeting her.”

“Really?” Chris asked.

“Yeah,” your grandpa said. “Emily practically disowned her. Probably should’ve called you.”

“No fucking shit. When was the last time they talked?” Chris asked.

“3 years ago,” Lucille said.

“It’s been five since they’ve seen each other. That’s when they had their big fight,” John said.

It’s late at night when you get released from the hospital. Your dad drives you to your house. You end up getting panicky and not wanting to go in. He takes you to his place and has his assistant go tomorrow to pack some bags for you. It’s a rough night so he stays up with you watching movies together until you fall asleep.

Chris takes you to Boston the next morning on a private jet. He sets up some appointments for you with doctors in Boston to make sure you’re recovering just fine. You meet Dodger and the two of you become best friends. It’s a lot of watching movies with your dad until you ultimately crash against him due to the meds. You also can’t seem to sleep alone in the guest room due to having terrible nightmares. With the first couple, Chris didn’t want to overstep and climb into the bed to hold you and try to make it go away. But it was clear that Dodger wasn’t cutting it. Just a couple nights a week, the three of you will be together in the same bed. Chris jokingly got you one of those starry night projectors but you both love it.

“What are you doing here?” You hear you’re dad hiss.

“It’s called dropping by unannounced to annoy you and to rescue your child from you,” Scott sassed.

“You are not taking my child anywhere, Scott,” Chris said.

“You make it sound like I wouldn’t bring her back,” Scott said.

Scott ends up taking you both out of the house. You have to listen to them both sing along with the radio. You end up capturing the two brothers on your phone. You agree going over to your grandparents house and meeting them even though you’re still recovering. It distracts you for awhile.

You get some news you don’t want to hear about your hand. It’s not healing as the doctors would like. They don’t know if you’ll be able to play guitar or piano (which will be one handed) like you had before. You end up having the surgery. Sebastian Stan surprises you when you wake up.

“Fuck off,” is what Sebastian says to you. You a small smile.

“Why’d ya say that?” Chris asked.

“It’s what your child first said to me when we met,” Sebastian said.

You hummed loudly to a song in your head making them laugh.

“She acts exactly like you when you’re drunk,” Sebastian teased.

As much as Chris wants to stay with you during your recovery, he does have to film but thankfully it’s in Boston. It’ll be like he has a regular job. However, there’s not much for you to do or you can do. You can’t sing or write. You end up getting stuck in your thoughts which isn’t a great place to be in for a long period of time.

Scott and Chris can clearly tell you’re absolutely miserable. Nobody knows how to help you out and get you out of it. Your dad ends up calling whoever he can. He calls Sebastian, Tom Holland, your manager, Scarlett, his mother.

Scarlett asks him, “what does she do for a living?”

“She’s a popstar,” Chris said.

“There’s your answer.”

He ends up getting a grand piano and putting it in the living room where the dining room table is. The table ends up in the garage with the chairs. It takes Chris playing a song poorly on it for you to come over and smack his left hand off the keys. It makes him smile as you play the song with your left hand and he plays with his right.

“Sit down next to me,” Chris said.

You sit next to him on the bench. He puts his left arm around your shoulders pulling you closer.

“Play me something,” he requested.

You give him a look that he’s been known to give people. He smiles. You let out a sigh- it’s more like a slight hiss. You play him a song. It turns into two and then into more.

You and your dad fly to LA as he’s got meetings and your ex has finally been arrested for what he did to you. You definitely built some walls up and retract from your dad as much as that sucks. Chris just knows he’s gotta be patient because he can’t force you to open up to him or you’ll probably push him so far away to the point of no return. Besides it’s only been 7 weeks since you first met each other.

“Hey, Y/n. I’m gonna watch The Muppets, you should join me,” Chris said after knocking on the bathroom door. “I’ll be in the living room.”

You stared at the door and listened to him walk away. You look back at the OxyContin in your hand. The pill bottle has your name on it. It was prescribed and filled once you were released from the hospital. There’s five pills left. You unscrew the top with some difficultly. You dump the little pills in the toilet and flush them. You drop the pill bottle in the trash and turned on the faucet. You let your left hand go under the water and you see the faint lines on your wrist. You’d let a blade run over them again but The Muppets will have to do.

“You’re just in time,” Chris smiled seeing that you took him up on his offer.

You sit right next to him. You both end up sharing a blanket as he noticed you getting cold.

You get your wires out in LA making it much easier to hold a conversation with people. You also get spotted out with your dad to dinner to celebrate that you can finally eat soft foods which blows up everywhere. You easily get backlash and told that you’re using him as a publicity stunt. Both his team and your own team finally meet on how to deal with the situation.

You finally speak up in the meeting. “I’m not doing fucking GMA or Ellen to talk about my sad little life and how it’s all good now ‘cause Captain America’s my dad. Are you insane? Have you not seen the shit I get from everyone? How everyone believes that everything that has happened— my boyfriend beating shit out of me because I told him to ‘fuck off’ to a leaked birth certificate revealing that fucking Chris Evans is my dad is just for publicity. It will not go over well especially with that fucking asshole out on bail talking shit because he can.”

You leave after snapping at everyone. Chris tries to talk to you but you snap at him telling him that he doesn’t know you and he’s not your dad. It definitely hurts to hear.

You don’t go back to his place which has him worried. He checks your home. You aren’t there.

You end up going to Hawaii to see your mom. It leads to a huge blow out. You’re screaming at her and she’s screaming at you. You’re told that she never wanted you and you were a mistake that she was saving Chris from. It truly destroys you.

Chris doesn’t see you again until he gets a call from your assistant in the middle of the night after she found you unconscious in the pool of your own blood. He of course comes even if you don’t want him there. He’ll sit at your bedside or the waiting room. He has to know that you’ll be okay.

“I’m gonna state this once and for all,” Chris said to you. “You’re stuck with me and I’m sorry that I’m your dad. I don’t know how to be one but I’ll figure it out.”

You cried which makes him climb into the hospital bed. He holds you tightly as you cry. He can tell you’ve gone through so much and you haven’t really had anyone. They’ve always left.

Chris takes you back to Boston once you get your cast off and sadly you’ll need another surgery but it thankfully can wait a bit. You start seeing a therapist that he helped find. You don’t talk about what was said in the room but he can you’re coming out of shell a bit.

You and Chris are seen again going to a courtroom in LA with Scott coming along. You even have some friends come in support. There’s tons of paparazzi and gossip sites covering it. It’s not a very fun experience especially with you having to take the stand and Chris learning some very heartbreaking things that you went through. Your ex tries to spew more lies about you and drag your dad into it. It’s thankfully over after three days and your ex is found guilty.

A celebratory dinner takes place at your favorite restaurant in LA. Chris gets to see you let loose a bit and smile more. He knows as BOSLEY that you don’t smile especially not in pictures. It’s your whole image that has been created and with everything that has happened, it hasn’t been a happy experience.

“Get next to her,” Chris is told.

You both grin widely with cheeks pressed together for one of your friends to take a picture. It gets posted on your dad’s twitter with a caption “there’s no denying it, I have a mini-me.” You retweet it.

[rodolfoparras]

Hi! I just have to know… what are your thoughts on Makarov/Price, or just Price with a very intense and feisty partner 👀

Oh my god friend I loved this question but Istg every time I went to answer it I ended up with a response in the form of a book so I’m doing my best to stick to bullet points

Anyways I present to you Price with a very intense / feisty reader

First and foremost I want to note that Price isn’t docile himself, he feels rather strongly and sometimes acts impulsively but he’s learned to handle it throughout the years.

However when he first enlisted , fresh faced and ready to conquer the injustices of the world, higher ups saw these attributes as something to take advantage of so that they did.

Back then he didn’t see that, he was just happy that there were people in power willing to listen and willing to help him and while he got his hands dirty and went against everything he stood for, the higher ups stayed back home while offering simple promotions for his dirty work.

Since Price rose so fast in ranking, he probably attended many private parties and banquets organized by the army, and at one of those events he was bound to meet his future s/o

Back then he’d met you because he’d snuck out the event, had felt suffocated by the crowd and went outside to smoke.

There you were leaned up against the wall and offering him your cigarette

He swiftly takes it, while discreetly giving you a once over, noting you must be a soldier but not one attending this specific event for whatever reasons.

“Party that boring eh?” You say, noting the suit on him and the gloomy look on his face,

“You can say that” he says before taking a drag of the cigarette. “I’m not much of a party person actually” he says, taking another drag before passing the cigarette back to you.

“Yet you attended this one “‘you say with a smile on your face while exhaling a cloud of smoke into the air.

“Didn’t have a choice” Price shrugs watching tobacco smoke swirl around in the dark sky.

“Says who?” You say, passing the cigarette back to him.

“The party’s for me” Price says, lip curling in disdain.

You feel your eyes widen at his words, attention now fully on him rather than the tobacco.

“Oh now you’ve got me curios”

“Just a promotion, nothing special” he says, lips now curling into a small smile

“Nothing special eh what is it? Captain?”

“Lieutenant”

“You’re right, doesn’t sound special at all” you snort and he laughs along with you

Just as you’re about to say something else you see someone waving him over.

“Looks like someone’s calling for you -“

“Price”

“I’ll see you around Lieutenant price “ you say with a smile on your face, snuffing out your cigarette before walking away.

The next time he sees you, is when you’re being reprimanded for your behavior and he’s in charge of your punishment. It had been a minor offense but had resulted in you having to run laps in the rain. However when you had arrived in front of him he had quickly released you off of it.

“A merciful lieutenant who’d think that?” You say with a smile on your face.

“Don’t see a point of you just running around in the rain, join me instead?” He says with a smile on his own while waving a cigarette in the air.

As you sit down and smoke, he finds out that many times you’ve ended up being reprimanded for your behavior but that they haven’t kicked you out yet since you’re a very good soldier.

However he cant seem to comprehend why you keep getting yourself in trouble and you don’t give him a clear answer to that question either.

“Just remember while our hands get dirty someone else’s stay clean, I’ll see you around lieutenant Price”

After that you continue to bump into each other and every time you do, it’s because you’re in some trouble and Price is the one to get you out of the punishment. He’s still torn between being loyal to the higher ups and accepting the fact that they’re using him as a pawn in their own little games .

However he ends up making a decision when you get in trouble despite having done nothing wrong. You’re sent to your room and ordered to attend a disciplinary meeting. Price tries to reason with the higher ups, but they aren’t listening and in that very moment he realizes that these people don’t care about doing the right thing. They care about having power and controlling their subordinates

Feeling frustrated about the situation, and also feeling deeply worried for you, he decides to go and see you.

For someone who risks losing their entire career you look calm as ever, opening the door with a soft smile on your face.

“Lieutenant” you say while gesturing for him to come in

“Price” he subconsciously correct while walking inside.

“So what brings you here? Not that I’m opposed to it or anything.”

“Just wanted to see if you’re alright after everything that happened today”

“Oh that?”You wave him off before patting down the pockets of your coat that hangs on the wall, and pull out a pack of cigarettes.

You quickly light one up and pass it to him, before gesturing for him to sit down on your bed with you.

“You’re not worried that you’ll get kicked out?” He says, taking a drag of the cigarette before passing it to you.

You chuckle in response, putting the cigarette between your lips before you go to respond “not really, maybe I’d be if I still were a recruit but now? Not so much?”

“Why?” He says watching you exhale the smoke into the air before his eyes fall onto your lips, the way they pucker up to release the smoke, before falling back into a natural pout.

“I don’t know if you’ve realized it yet but they don’t give a shit about us here”

“I’m starting to” he says, eyes still locked on your lips, noting the way they’re curling up into a grin.

“Good” is all you say, “now if that’s all you wanted to say I suppose we’re done here unless..” you trail off, voice going lower as you lean closer to him.

For a second his eyes widen, body freezing in place. You continue to lean in closer until there’s only a cloud of smoke between you, serving as a barrier.

“Im- I -“ he tries to speak but his brain isn’t cooperating with his mouth. Instead he focuses on the way you lick your lips before you speak.

“If you don’t want this tell me to stop and I’ll-“ but before you can say more he grabs ahold of your neck and smashes your lips together, leaving you wide eyed and gasping before your eyes flutter shut and you lose yourself into the kiss

“You sure you don’t want me to come with you” he says looking like a whole sight with the sheets draped over his waist while lounging on your bed.

“No I’ll be fine” you say while shrugging on your shirt. “You stay here, I’ll be back soon” you add, eyes trailing over his naked body and feeling blood pool down to your lower half.

“Okay “ he says biting down on his lips before sinking back into the sheets .

You return quickly just like you had promised, and Price keeps his own promises by staying in your bed.

He stays there all day and for many more years to come. However the two of you don’t become anything official until much later on seeing as he’s focusing more on his career than having a relationship.

But in between those years of waiting you become a close companion of his as well as someone who knows his body better than anybody else in this world. You taught him to not let people take advantage of him and to do what he thinks and feels is right. He’s still loyal to some degree to those above him solely for the reason that they sometimes can come in hand. However Price wouldn’t let anyone dull your spark. He’d always aim to make sure that you get to stay true to yourself even if that means getting into a fight with his squad because you’re getting on the teams nerves with your temper, or making it clear that you are to be as respected as he is even though you don’t have some fancy title to go with your name

You work seamlessly together so much so people will come up to him and tell him “keep your dog on a leash” referring to the way you’re hovering behind Price and barring your teeth. But Price’s lips would only curl up into a smile before he responds with “it’s not him you have to worry about” because even though he’s learned to bite his tongue in order to keep important pawns on his chess board, he’d bite anyone’s neck off if they were to disrespect you.

[streamat4am]

Yo mate. Here, to make your brain less mush.

On the bitching au. It's said that Wednesday is an omega suited for Enid. Does it mean she doesn't "pass" as an omega for the rest of the people that can scent her ? Like, family, friends...

And also does her behavior change, heats aside ? Or, here again, only with Enid. Does she want to build a nest and everything? And even with the heats, she is practically synced with Enid but... Does she have them randomly?(or as randomly as the A/B/O lore says they are)

Warning for dubious consent because... It's omegaverse and Wednesday is very much using her new parts to her advantage, Enid is willing but instincts exist and blurs the lines at times

So yes, wednesday very much smells like an omega! While not as strong or obvious, the bitching has worked and it shows. Except, unlike most omegas who can entice more than one person with their scent, Wednesday made sure to only be catered to Enid's taste. Her smell? A lovely tartar steak that tempts Enid to take and take until she's satisfied. The slick? An addictive dessert that has Enid willingly worshiping the place it came from

.. Idk how else to describe slick yall, I haven't fully thought on that yet but it's a flavor that Enid loves anyways

It's all Wednesday ever wanted, especially when those teeth sink into her neck after Enid opened her room in a worry. It's instincts and partly her own feelings that drive Enid to doing what she did, not to mention Wednesday encouraging her

In the morning, Wednesday couldn't stop the possessive delight that curled in her chest when Enid says she'll take responsibility with tears in her eyes once she realized that they're knotted and she claimed wednesday as a mate

Wednesday's essentially Enid's drug. Her scent can tempt and easily calm the alpha whenever she wants and Enid can't do a thing because whether she likes it or not; her instincts and herself will be influenced by Wednesday literally being made for her

Vice versa also happens but not that extreme bc Enid's actually pretty normal

But nope! Wednesday doesn't change around other people, only around Enid is she tempted to be catering, to curl in a nest as long as it's them two

Sure she cares about people, but she's an obsessive freak so she would never be like that around them. Unless it's with her family but she wouldn't even reach this type of intimacy because either way, she made sure she's built for Enid

This goes for her instincts. It's only in their den, their nests and their space will Wednesday feel the urge to act like how an omega should

Also she's synced with Enid's ruts, especially since their mated (a normal usual thing) and Wednesday is delighted at the fact that now Enid wouldn't need to go to those damn rut centre's because she has Wednesday

The bitch knows full well that its healthy to go to these centres but if Wednesday had to smell another omega on Enid every few months, she's about to go commit homicide

Anyways, Enid wholeheartedly believes that Wednesday must've been a late bloomer omega and there's guilt for taking advantage of Wednesday because she must've been in heat when she barged in

Normally Enid could've controlled herself, after all she isn't an irrational being but since wednesday was built to Enid's taste...

Yeah.

She always makes sure to cater to Wednesday's needs more after that. It takes a month or two for Enid to open up about her worries.

Wednesday smiles, happy to be depended on and reassuring that she enjoyed it. It was then that the alpha finally relaxed and so the relationship went from solely Enid feeling responsible to her acknowledging that she has always been attracted to Wednesday, she just.. Didn't expect it to come out like this

For context, no Wednesday is not an actual late bloomer. She's a beta who bitched herself to be Enid's perfect omega after nearly being driven to insanity at the thought of Enid finding a mate that isn't her. Due to how rare it is to have an alpha/beta to be mates, Wednesday knew her chances would be higher if she were an omega and she knows damn well what an omega can do to an alpha

Speaking of being attracted to Wednesday, Enid was fully okay with dating and mating with a beta! Sure she hasn't exactly been so open about it but it's because no one asked

So basically, Wednesday did all that for no reason because she already had a chance so if she simply went and courted Enid like a normal person, everything would still be gucci

But I wanted to lowkey make a dark au where Wednesday went to the extremes because it's been a bit and now here we are!

[losfacedevil]

Darkness of the Night (4)

CATCH UP ON HIS STORY HERE

Meet Samuel, the resident Vampire of New Shoreham… and come along on the journey of his wild life in the afterlife

Sam pulled a deep breath in through his nose and rolled his shoulders back, trying to alleviate the tension that was building in his muscles as the sign for the diner came into view. He began to run the conversation he needed to have with Marjorie over in his head one last time, not wanting to trip over his words when the time to broach the subject finally came. 

The phantom feeling of his heart pounding in his chest was beginning to irk him, knowing full well the organ failed to actually beat any longer. Sam swallowed hard and slowly made his way to the front door, wrapping his hand around the pull bar style handle and watched as he knuckles turned white against the force in which he held the bar. With one last deep, and calming breath,  he yanked the door open and let himself inside. A huff of relieved breath whooshed past his lips as he found the diner to be empty, thanking whatever higher power there was for working this in his favor. 

Marjorie stood behind the counter, a to-go coffee cup full of what Sam could only assume was piping hot O+ blood and a scowl on her face that would scold even the most innocent of people. He tipped his head in her direction and quickly got to work, noting the dirty plates still sat on the counter top where patrons must have just left not that long ago. 

“Everything okay at home?” Marjorie mused, wanting more insight on the urgent matter that had pulled Sam from work the previous night. His movements stilled, and his gaze found Marjorie’s, one that began to burn a hole into his as she waited for his response. 

“Yeah! Yeah, everything’s okay. Josh just didn’t want to babysit her anymore.” Sam rushed out, quickly beginning to scrub a pan that something had been burned onto. He cursed as he sponge began to tear but the caked on food didn’t even budge. Marjorie gave him a once over, still not fully believing someone she created had made such a grave mistake. 

“Is that all? Hmm, by the way you had ran out of here I assumed she’d woken early just like you did. It would be a shame if she devoured your brother as her first feeding, wouldn’t it, Samuel?” She cooed, knowing the use of his full name made his skin crawl. A frustrated huff slipped past Sam’s nose and he slammed the plate he was washing down into the drying rack. 

“How do I fix this? Tell me what to do, Marjorie.” Sam cut right to the chase, the anger settling in his chest beginning to bubble and rise to the surface. Marjorie couldn’t help the laughter that slipped past her lips and she shook her head at her poor, failing fledgling. 

“You better hope her parents have some tough skin. There’s nothing I can do to help.” She shrugged and began to nonchalantly examine her nails, anything to keep her attention off of his face. With a soft shrug of her shoulders she took a few steps forwards and closed the little bit of distance that had been put between them.

“You best have a rock solid explanation foe her parents. Unless you have another idea in mind.” She spoke with authority, jabbing her finger into the middle of his chest. 

“I have to get her out of here, Marjorie. She’s… she’s connected to my brother… the one we no longer speak to.” 

Jakes ears began to pick up the conversation as he slowly descended upon the diner, hovering in the air like that of a helicopter searching for a missing person. He debated staying where he was, hovering just above the roof of the building, and using the skylight as a window inside until his wings tired, or dropping to the ground and hope he wasn’t caught. 

“What do you mean she’s connected to your brother? How is she connected Sam?” Marjorie’s tone began to take on a more concerned sound as she reached over and turned off the running faucet, pulling his attention from the work he was burying himself him. Sam took a deep breath and reached up, grabbing the hand towel off of the hook and slowly began to dry his hands.

“She’s… his mate… I screwed up fucking royally.” Marjorie’s eyes widened and she snatched the now dampened hand towel out of Sam’s hands. Raising her arm she brought it down against his head and the damp fabric began to sting his skin. 

“HOW DID YOU NOT KNOW SHE’S YOUR BROTHERS MATE?!” Marjorie all but yelled, continuing to wail on Sam with the hand towel. Sam took the beating he was being given knowing he fully deserved this one. 

“We don’t talk to him anymore, how was I to know the girl who randomly strolled in here at 8 o’clock at night was my brothers mate?!” Sam growled and began pacing the length of the kitchen, trying to wrack his brain for what exactly he was going to do. 

“You can take her to Venice, take her to Darick’s coven, he can help.” She spoke quickly and quietly, not wanting anyone to overhear. She knew this was no longer something she could turn into a lesson and quickly jumped into action. 

Jake nodded as he took a mental note of where she was telling Sam to take Vayda, to the coven of a well known vampiric leader. He swallowed hard as his mind began to race, trying to figure out exactly how Sam planned on getting Vayda out of the country when she would be famished the minute she awoke. 

He knew Sam wouldn’t be able to walk her onto a regular airplane, her self control would be next to nonexistent for months after she woke. Jake slowly descended and let his feet rest against the pointed tip of the roof, letting his wings come to a halt and rest for a moment. It was then that the name popped into Jakes head as it slipped past his little brothers lips. 

“I’ll have to take her to Marcelina.” Sam muttered and reached up, threading his fingers through his hair at the thought of his Aunt. 

“Take her to Marcelina’s when she wakes, after she’s had a pint or two to tide her over. Get her to Darick’s in Venice, he’ll know what to do.” Marjorie spoke as the little set of jingle bells over the main door chimed, signaling humans were afoot. 

Jake nodded his head slowly as he took in the information that Marjorie had just given Sam. He wasn’t sure who Marcelina was but he knew all it would take was a single visit to Josh to learn all about this mysterious woman. 

“Marcelina, huh? We’ll see just how much she helps you if I get to her first.” Jake mumbled and tilted his head as he began to levitate and took off flying through the night sky. 

~*~*~

A deep yawn slipped past Josh’s lips as he leaned back against the couch and reached up, running a hand down over his tired eyes. His sleep schedule had been nearly nonexistent, fear of what his fate might be if you were to wake before Sam returned home haunting his thoughts. His ears perked up at the sound of a rustling outside the living room window, Sam’s rose bushes seemingly being trampled on. He pushed himself to his feet and slowly made his way over to the window. 

“Sam I swear to god, now is not the time to be fucking around.” Josh grumbled and reached up slowly, wrapping his fingers around the curtain and pulled it back as quickly as he could. In front of him stood Jake, his hands cupped around the sides of his face and his forehead pressed to the glass. Josh slammed a hand into the middle of the window and startled his twin, causing him to fall backwards into the prickly thorns of the roses. 

“You’re not funny, Jake.” Josh seethed, his anger outweighing the relief that washed over him at the realization that it was just Jake. He watched as Jake pried his fingers under the outer lip of the window and pushed the glass pane upwards, opening the house to the outside world. 

“Marcelina.” Was all Jake muttered, his blood boiling strong enough he could hear it in his ears. Josh raised a brow and shrugged his shoulders, unsure what Marcelina had to do with anything. 

“Where is Marcelina?” Jake posed the question, crossing his arms protectively over his chest as if to protect himself from his familiar. Josh rolled his eyes, knowing full well that him telling Jake where to find Sam’s mystical aunt would result in yet another brawl. 

“I don’t know, Jake. But don’t go messing around with Marci, she’s not pretty when she’s mad.” Jake rolled his eyes, unsure of if Marcelina was human, Fae or Vampire, but knew that he could take on whatever was thrown his way. 

“You’ll be sorry if I find out you know where she is.” Jake mumbled and turned on his heel, expanding his wings and slowly rose into the darkness of the night. 

A sigh slipped past Josh’s lips and he slunk back to the couch, plopping down where he was originally sitting. Scooping his phone up off of the table, he opened a new message to Sam and typed quickly before hitting send and sitting back against the couch, letting his eyes finally flutter shut. 

‘Jakes looking for Marcelina, you best hope he doesn’t find her before you warn her.’ 

Sam’s eyes grew wide as he read the message that Josh had sent him. He began to pace, sliding the phone back into his pocket and reached up to thread his fingers through his hair. Marjorie’s brow raised as her gaze landed on Sam and his panic stricken face. 

“Jakes looking for Marcelina.” 

Until next time…

TAGLIST: @vanfleeter @readyforthegarden @joshsindigostreak @ascendingtostardust @sammysprincess @sammykiszkamyass @belovedsamuel @dannythedog @stardustvanfleet @devilat-thedoor @the-wicked-gnome @runwayblues @gracev0609 @writingcold @lipstickitty @sunfl0wer-power @allieisacrybaby @jordie-gvf @josh-iamyour-mama @slut4lando

[muzzleroars]

Just ignoring that I've been investedly reading and liking most of ya stuff recently, BUT (idk if you've answered this or not yet I might just be blind) but how do you think V1s and Gabe's first 'non hostile' encounter went? How did v1 go about resisting its programming, and gabe his, so to speak?

Thanks for further fueling my brainrot btw, your long text posts are like a guilty pleasure to read, pls make more ^^

aaaa thank you so much ;o; it genuinely makes me so happy to know that ppl read my ridiculously long answers to so many things and all the lore building!! i wish i could pass out pieces of cake to all of you.....

i actually haven't talked about this scenario in particular, but it's really one i enjoy even if it's a small, quieter scene. gabriel at this point needs something like closure, and i think just about all he can get is knowing whether or not the connection and passion he felt with v1 was reciprocated in some capacity. did v1 recognize him? can it feel anything from him? he had never been so personally affected by another, and so he goes against what he is to seek out that answer. to see if v1 is willing to interface with him through communicating rather than attempting to bleed him dry....because he thinks it just might. gabriel knows that v1 has the capacity to be non-hostile, as it has relented at the end of both of their encounters to allow him to speak, meaning its engagement of another actually isn't automatic or forced. that aside, he's also highly aware he instigated both fights - their encounter in gluttony was an obviously hostile display that v1 immediately responded to, while in heresy it....approached him from behind, yet didn't fire until he, again, armed himself against it. he knows he's set a precedent now, with v1 perhaps marking him as belligerent, but he decides to risk approaching it anyway with his swords sheathed to see what might happen.

i think he observes it at a distance for just a bit, seeing what it does when it has nothing around it to fight...and he's left half-surprised. it doesn't immediately take off to the next room in a mindless search for blood, but instead explores its surroundings uninhibited by enemy combatants. it's safe. it roots around curiously, using its guns and fists to break through obstacles and offering soft little chirps at unexpected sights or sounds. it's almost surreal for him, understanding in that moment that they had both only seen one side of the other - v1 is undoubtedly capable of tearing hell apart, yet it clearly has a mind that occupies itself beyond that goal. it has an internal world, and that's all he needed to know. so gabriel silently touches down when he's satisfied, doing his best to gauge just when to approach it so he doesn't catch it too off-guard (he even folds up his wings in an attempt to reduce his bulk)

as expected, v1 is still surprised and immediately wary - he sees its head snap to and its entire body stiffen to its viper-like readiness. a coin held fast, not yet launched into the air. gabriel raises his hands to show their emptiness, telling it in soft but certain terms that he wishes for them to meet in peace. v1 doesn't seem to respond, still standing in rapt attention and ready to strike. so gabriel stops moving forward and considers his options. again risky, but he's a dead man walking anyway. he kneels to the ground, bowing his head and still holding up his hands far from his swords in an effort to fully impress that he means it no harm. not this time. a beat passes between them, gabriel almost surprised by his own sense of calm, until he hears the quick little steps of v1's feet coming to greet him. the coin flicks and he almost winces, but then it flicks again. and again. and he looks up to see v1's face a couple inches from his own. he can hear the little zoom of its optical, see how the rings in its lens dilate and contract as it investigates him up close. he huffs a quiet laugh in response, sending v1 jumping back and flaring out its wings before he apologizes and continues to hold still. it seems to accept this as it moves back in, soon reaching out a hand to touch him and figure out just what he's made of, how he's put together.

gabriel begins to speak as it explores, at first a disjointed stream of consciousness until he can find how to articulate his troubled mind with its dying thoughts. he stays there bowed to it, coming to pour his heart out like a last confession to an entirely silent companion. until he asks if it hears him. if it knows him. if it recognizes anything in him or if he's truly alone in all he's felt, calling out to a partner that can't answer in the same way. and v1 stands there still quiet, still just staring. gabriel tries to immediately fill that silence like he can't bear it, saying that it's truly ok. even if v1 is empty, he thanks it for what it did, thanks it for letting him remember who he was and feel as if he was fully himself one last time. and he's never been just himself for himself, so it gave him something new right at the end of everything and even if all of this just the one-sided, foolish feelings of a dying angel it really is the only thing that can mean anything at all when the world is dying the same way he is - until v1 flicks its coin at his helmet. and it nods. it hears him. for once gabriel is rendered speechless as v1 huddles down next to him. it has time. gabriel struggles with the mortifying, terrifying, incredible, phenomenal thought that the little machine beside him might harbor an ounce of the same feelings he does for it. it's not an automatic love, it's not a complete surrender of what they had been before - v1 still hasn't processed its feelings while a part of gabriel still can't accept that he truly loves v1 (they're decently hot and cold for a minute, having quiet intimate moments that one or the other ruins - intentionally or not - to end in a bloody fight), but this is where it starts. because really, neither of them can come back from knowing that they would choose to spend time with each other without the promise of a fight.

[skylarmoon71]

Miguel O' Hara - AU Scientist (Across the Spider-Verse) - Chapter 5

Miguel would forever be a sweetheart. You could stare at him all day. 

Literally. 

That’s what you were doing.

Just staring at him.

He always wears this cute expression on his face when he’s deep in his work.

However, the question at the back of your head kept nagging you.

Why?

If Miguel is so perfect, why did you continue to hide your secret?

Fear.

Mistrust.

You couldn’t really say what it was.

“Are you alright?”

You finally lift your head and he’s right there in front of you. That little worried crease deep in his brow.

“I’m fine, just a little tired I guess.”

He nods, leaving a light kiss on your cheek.

“We have been working non stop. I can’t say for sure if this technology will actually work. The science is flawless, but it seems a bit unrealistic to jump through alternate realities. Even for Mr. Jamieson this is a leap.”

You’d like to say you agree with him. Jumping through spaces in time and reality is a far-fetched dream, but you know otherwise.

If you were being quite honest you hoped that it would take them another century or so to even propose the idea.

Reality truly is harsh.

“There’s not much more we can do at the moment. The batteries need at least a week to fully charge to accommodate the energy charge that we’ll need. We should turn in for the night.”

“Count me in.”

You move out of the chair, stretching your limbs.

Miguel watches you with interest, and when you catch the stare, you blush.

“What?”

“It’s nothing. You’re just cute.”

What you’ve learned about Miguel is that he’s very honest. He says what’s on his mind. It’s always had a way of throwing you off. His compliments are too much for your heart.

“T-Thank you..”

Boy, he had you wrapped around his finger.

“Would you like to stay over tonight?”

You nod very eagerly.

“I’d like that.”

He smiles, holding out his hand for you to take. It’s a simple gesture, yet you’ve never taken it for granted. But this isn’t just a slight touch. It’s an invitation into his life. The familiar pang of guilt hits you, and you hesitate just for a moment.

Then you will yourself to press forward.

The air is a bit heavy.

For the majority of the night you manage to school your features in what seems like a convincing smile. Laying in bed, your eyes are directed at the ceiling. Your gaze moves to Miguel’s sleeping form. He looks so cute, even in sleep. Smiling to yourself, you rise, heading for the kitchen.

It’s hard pretending everything is alright, but what else can you do?

With a sigh, you intend to reach into the fridge and grab a drink, but there is a shift in the air. You flinch, eyes widening at the very visible multicolored portal that has opened right behind you. Your fist clench defensively, watching the suited figure walk through casually. You let out one uneven breath, ready for anything.

This is what you’d been afraid of.

“The fact that you haven’t run off yet must mean that I have the right person.”

That voice…

His mask depixelated right in front of your eyes. That darkened gaze is not what you expect. His stature, that hair, you know it all too well.

“Miguel..”

He looks a bit put off by your expression. His head tilts to the left.

“I’m not who you might know on this earth. My name is Miguel O’ Hara. I'm Spiderman from Earth 2099.

It looks like it has all finally caught up to you.

“I’m here to-”

“I’m not interested.” Your immediate response isn’t what he expects.

“This is a serious matter.”

“I know all about your anomalies and little justice society.”

He’s shocked.

“You really think you’re the first. There’s so much that you don’t understand. You think that this is some noble cause but you’re wrong. We’re heroes, not gods. I’m not interested in your war. So leave.”

“You realize that humanity depends on us keeping all the realities safe. If you don’t help, are you ready to live with the consequences of your actions?”

“That’s rich coming from you.”

The statement has caught him by surprise. Miguel takes a step back, and when he sees the gold light flicker around your irises, he briefly contemplates his choice in coming here.

“Who..are you?”

He’s never been this unprepared. He knew just about every spider-person. That’s why when Lyla told him of the new variant, he was skeptical. He couldn’t find any information of a hero on this earth, yet he detected patterns that were basically textbook for anyone with spider enhanced abilities.

“Leave.”

There’s nothing but malice in your voice.

Miguel wants to know more, to understand how you know so much yet refuse to assist.

“I’ll be back, you can count on it.”

He doesn’t say anything else, just clicks his watch, his mask materializing once more as he steps back into the portal. It finally dissipates right before your eyes and you bite down on your lip.

“(Y/N)..”

The voice startles you, and you turn. Miguel is standing right there and from the look on his face, he’d been there for a while.

At that very moment, your heart sinks.

“I screwed up..”

There’s nowhere to run now. 

[cerealmonster15]

kiss marry kill crewel trein vargas

WHFJWKJFKLDSJF wait omg i gotta think about this one for a minute. i love overthinking these things LOL!!! hang on lemme try and make a case for them all, weigh the pros and cons before deciding...

so like im pretty close in age to vargas and crewel so that gives them a bias to the first two but fksdjfhsdj i do like trein 😔 i like how much he cares about his cat and his students and his daughters 🥺 hes been married before and it SOUNDS like hes had a pretty loving family relationship from what we've heard. i feel like that makes a decent case for marriage, also he's a cat lover and im a cat lover so tbh not a bad consideration. HOWEVER he is still old enough to be my father and has a more old fashioned way of life that i think maybe would clash a lil jkdjfskf

vargas is so funny but hes so stressful LOL JFKLDSJFSDLJ i'm obsessed with his vargas camp thing. like he's so nuts for that... taking the children camping and then kidnapping and hunting them for sport to train them or whatever the hell his plan was there. and roping crewel into the second one lol 😭😭😭 it's so bonkers but it's soooo funny. like i think he'd stress me out w/how fitness oriented he is (I enjoy physical activities and i practice martial arts but lowkey his fixation reminds me a little of my father and i dont like that association LOL 😬) BUT i do love comedy. so i could be swayed i suppose. maybe. jsdklfhsg

and then crewel is def very pretty but also stressful LOL DSJKFLSD THERYE ALL STRESSFUL this is the game about stressful characters after all. his temper scares me but i do like that he also cares about his students in those moments where it matters,,, i also think it's very funny that he was convinced to join vargas in hunting down the children in camp fjsdklhgds AND that he's partially responsible for beanfest Being The Way That It Is. i like whenever we learn teacher lore like this kjfdsjfkl this man was too aggro of a rebel and changed the course of the game or whatever. but also hes a dog person and i have learned in my life that i generally cannot live with dogs due to how I operate as a person 😶 but considering his whole THING is that he is a MEGA DOG LOVER AND. well i think he has dogs. i assume he does. i actually cant remember if he literally does have pet dogs or just makes that his aesthetic FJKSDJFKLSJFJ i think he does. i remember he and trein at least but heads over many things and one of them being cats vs dogs l o l. i like some dogs but they do not pair well with my sound sensitivity i think it would just Not Work jfksljfldshfg

this just tells me i dont wanna marry any of them LOL ☠️ i'd pick sam if i could, hes fun i like him 😔 FDSJKFJSDKLGH but i will play by the rules ummm um um ummmm.... i dont want to kill them either lol i like them!!! i do this any time my partner throws a question like this at me too lol im like okay hang on lemme lay out the facts and think critically about the situation 🤔 KJFDLKSHFLKSDJG

okay fuck it i think marriage goes to vargas. i was close to picking trein but even looking past the age thing i still think he'd be too ~old fashioned~ w/his mindset and i very much don't care for living life traditionally,, also i dont think we know how old his daughters are exactly except that theyre 'grown up' so theyre probably around my age tbh and that would Feel Weird dsfjlkdsgh everything else was nice tho i'm sorry trein. in another life i think i wouldve liked to co-parent lucius w/u 😔 i think vargas could be fun tho. he's sillystrange and i would perhaps partake in martial arts with him. i cant decide if he'd be too scary about it and brute force his techniques [which SUCKS and is NOT FUN when people do that!!!] or if he'd be like on top of having good form and doing it well skldfhsdklfj who knows....... BUT THIS AINT ABOUT THAT I NEED TO MOVE ON!!!!!!

and then kiss. if we are going fully superficial quota here then yeah my initial thought would be kiss crewel lol he's pretty what can i say 😔

I'M SO SORRY TREIN THAT JUST LEAVES YOU LAST IN THE KILL SLOT NOOOO AUGH i tried so hard to fight for him [??? fighting myself??? whatever LOL] bc i felt like it's too cliche to be like "idk hes old" so i wanted to give him fair consideration 😭😭😭 I LIKE HIM!!!!! I LIKE THE FACULTY!!!!!!!

anyway thank u this fully distracted me for like 30 minutes LOL um. who would u pick tho 👀

[wildissylupus]

The Gunslinger

Divergency from Canon;

Unlike Cassidy, who is motivated by redemption and doing what he thinks is right, the Gunslinger is motivated by money and adventure. He seems a lot more selfish and jaded then Cassidy and is also rather hostile towards The Alchemist.

The Gunslinger have no interactions with each other and no mentions of each other in other voice lines so it most likely means they have never met.

The Gunslinger seems to be a bit of a hypocrite, being adverse to magic and Alchemy but being friendly towards obviously magic creature, such as The Archer and The Will-o-the-Wisp.

General Lore;

The Gunslinger is based off of a pre-established character known as Van Helsing. He states that his arm was taken by a darker power and that it's his actual job to hunt down monsters like Vampires and Werewolves.

Like the Soldier, he comes back during Endless Night, and during that he seems to have become less selfish, though he is still motivated by money and adventure. Though something that is interesting is that he's been hunting down The Countess for awhile and that doesn't seem to be because of adventure or money, but for personal reasons.

The Gunslinger is from America but it is never stated from where in America he's from. It's also stated by The Swordsman that he and The Gunslinger are similar in the way that they've never had a place to call home.

Through interactions we know that at the very least The Gunslinger and The Will-o-the-Wisp have history together, though we don't know whether or not this was before or after the accident that separated the Will-o-the-Wisp from her body.

What is implied;

It is implied by The Soldier that The Gunslinger isn't human. This is implied through the voice line; "A soldier, an alchemist, an archer and... an oddity. A motley group we have assembled here.", from my knolege the only other time this is said is when The Monk is on the team. Another character who seems human, but is very much not.

I will get into what I persoanlly think the Gunslinger is in a theory post about Halloween Terrors but for now I will only discus what is fully implied by canon.

Now let's get into the canon Gunslinger skin;

Something instantly of note for this skin is that his arm reads of magic to me, and considering that he stated that his arm was taken by a darker power. It doesn't surprise me that his arm is magic.

It's somewhat implied that The Soldier and The Gunslinger knew each other at some point but The Gunslinger can't seem to remember him properly. The Soldier is also very distant in his response, saying that maybe they knew each other in another life. Which implies that either they met when The Gunslinger was young or there is some reincarnation/revival/immortal memory loss going on with The Gunslinger.

The Van Helsing skin also has some skin specific voicelines, which does imply that his name is still Cassidy in the universe. Also a little detail I love about these voice lines is that he says "It's High Moon" instead of "It's High Noon".

[ashplayz]

(Short)

Treasure planet characters react to: accidentally hurting S/O in an argument and she runs and locks a door and the character begs her to let them in and her response is "... So you can hurt me again..?" (How I think they'd react at least)

Warnings: Pretty self explanatory- angst and fluff I guess..

Characters included: Captain Amelia, Dr. Delbert Doppler (separately, although I do love those two together) Jim Hawkins, John Silver (cyborg) (S/O goes by Y/n, she you and they)

Captain Amelia:

The beginning of the movie I thought she was a bit stuck up/uptight, full of herself so I think she would think y/n was just trying to make her feel bad so they could win the argument

and that she didn't actually hurt her

But when y/n says that she realizes and her heart SINKS she doesn't really know how to handle emotions well in my opinion (I envy those who can)

She wouldn't know what to do, she'd feel defeated and doesn't make another move towards you.

I think She'd probably make Jim talk to y/n for her and would keep her distance until y/n is comfortable, then grab y/ns hands and give her a very lengthy apology

She'd be rambling and would look stupid because you already forgave her 😂

Dr. Delbert Doppler:

Doesn'tt normally argue with you. (Personally I think he's a kiss up)

I don't think y/n would normally care because he's very clumsy and he's probably accidentally hit her before (like barely) when they're not even arguing, just a total accident.

But it was the way he flipped out about it is what scared her and why she ran and he already had teary eyes when she runs

(the only reason she'd say that is if she was having a panic attack)

but when she says that he just starts crying silently and just sits by the door and waits until she calms down.

I feel like once she calms down a few hours later she finally opens the door and sees him still by the door struggling to stay awake.

She'd ask him to cuddle and neither of them would talk until morning.

He'd probably try to make her favorite breakfast and would feel awful about what happened for the rest of the week

like days after it happens he keeps apologizing and she's just like "babe. I love you, but stop" 🤣

Jim Hawkins:

(I know he's literally the main character but I have no clue how to write him, still tried tho)

He wouldn't fully comprehend what just happened at first but once he does his hands start shaking.

He let out a sad apology then just leaves

He comes back to fix things after the cyborg guy (John Silver) gave him a pep talk

when she finally lets him hug her he starts crying and rambling Apologies while burying his face in the crook of her neck holding her tightly

I feel like he bottles a lot of things up so something tipping his emotions over the edge like this causes an overflow, you've never seen him look so fragile before.. 🥺

John Silver:

He's a big softy so the thought of hurting his S/O is his worst nightmare

The second it happens his eyes well up and he's like a deer In the headlights

when y/n tries to run he goes to grab her hand apologizing swearing to make it up to her but he scared her more

When she said that he just leaves her alone probably leaves for like 3 days

but when he comes back he has a

crap ton of treasure he stole jewelry/gems you name it just to make it up to her but she'd already forgiven him and was just really worried when he didn't come back

He'd definitely spoil his S/O on a regular day so something like this makes him go a bit overboard 🤏

(Just watched this movie for the first time and I'm bummed there's not a whole lot of fanfiction worthy characters, I considered doing Scroop (scorpion guy) but I'm pretty sure that character would genuinely be abusive so, No. I could have done the robot guy B. E. N, But I figured that might be awkward especially if it's before he got his brain pice back, it's really hard to envision him In a relationship as well unless she's also a robot, he is a sweetheart tho I really like his character..

Attention tumblr writers!!

Please make your own stories with this prompt: "accidentally hurting S/O in an argument and she runs and locks a door and the character begs her to let them in and her response is "... So you can hurt me again..?" Please somebody besides me let's make this prompt a thing! 🙏

[b-lessings]

We’ve been mutuals for a long time so I remember your occasional mentions about therapy and healing, which actually played a role in prompting me to try and understand my own trauma I was in denial of for a very long time and starting my journey towards getting better I guess. I’m still really struggling with my anxiety, have been for a really long time, sometimes the triggers are too overwhelming and feels like therapy and trauma work only make me understand enough to want to run away again, due to how much my body reacts in social settings, or at the thought of how out of control everything is in my brain. Can I ask, perhaps in vague terms, what was your journey like in the beginning? Does the anxiety ever start to lessen in intensity? Do you ever get to the point where you can process your trauma enough to finally face the reality of it’s remnants in people and places? How long does it take till you begin to seek happiness instead of the vicious internal destruction? How (if at all) does the dynamics of your healing journey change when you let another person you love into your life?

By the end of (reading) this ask I was like ouuff 😮‍💨 that's heavy😅

Salam my dear, I appreciate you sending this ask, I see your courage and your will to get better and get a bit of control over your life, and that's only a sign of strength and bravery, I am proud of you 🤍

Now, I am not sure if I am gonna answer all your points or get carried away by my own thoughts but let me give it a try.

First of all, from personal experience (obviously all my answers will be based on that) I don't think anxiety is something we can totally heal from or get rid of, it is not a feature we can deactivate, and do not take this the wrong way, I will explain later, but with therapy we learn to cope with our anxiety, we learn to make peace with it, and live with it in the most cooperative non-impeding ways.

One of the most memorable sayings that my therapist told me so early on in my journey is that her and my anxiety are both trying to do the same thing: protect me, they are not working against each other, they would actually work together (if my anxiety wouldn't be so stubborn lol).

Anxiety is in simple terms or at a very primal level a reaction to a trigger, you brain detects something that it deems wrong or dangerous and it alerts your body - there is nothing wrong with that. In fact, as human beings we relied on that trigger-response for God knows how many thousands of years to survive and get to this point in history. But then anxiety is perceived as a problem once it becomes a disability, in the sense that it would prevent the person from going on about their day normally.

Now what happened is that I lived like 27 or 28 years of my life not even realizing I had anxiety. I would hear people talk about it all the time and it never clicked, for me not even once that hey that's what I have! Until my therapist said the word. And I was like " anxiety? Me? Noway! I am an extrovert, I have a lot of friends, I am not scared of crowds, I love trying new things and living new experiences blah blah blah" but I had no idea that I had actually been repressing it all in for all those years.

So after the acceptance, the second phase was that anxiety took over my life! I had become fully afraid of everything and I just retrieved to myself. Everything was emphasized. I sorta kinda cut off people and stopped going after things and experiences blah blah .. I remember telling my therapist, since the day I was faced with the diagnosis, seems like anxiety is all that I am! I want to get my old self back, I want to get my life back! Anxiety stole my life! It was painful, it was uncomfortable and it was also my excuse for everything..

But then, one of the biggest turning-points in my therapy journey was when I decided to love my anxiety, and understand it better, understand that it does not want to do me any harm but actually protect me, so I became more aware inward and outward, I became very attentive to the changes and the signs my body gives me, you can catch me whispering " what is it babygirl, what's wrong? " as soon as I feel that stomach ache, lol. I honestly do talk to it, I can proudly say I befriended it and that's how I managed to get on its good sign and take control of my life back.

Now I even anticipate it. I sorta know my triggers, so I can te that I will have an episode, I have learned a few techniques on how to calm myself down or distract my mind, sometimes when it is intense I would allow myself a day off or even an hour off just to myself to do something that brings me comfort, I journal a lot, I analyze my thoughts and whatnot.. and that's what therapy is good for, it equips you with tools to cope with the issue at hand. And yes, that's how it lessens in its intensity like you said. That's how you gain back control over your life. That's how you get closer to feeling and achieving peace, because listen boo, we are not looking for happiness, the goal is actually peace. Happiness is only a moment in time, it's fleeing, it's just an instant. Inner peace and mental peace is what lasts.

I can't tell you how much time it takes because every journey is personal and different, to each of us their path, and relapses do happen, setbacks do happen, after all we are only human, and especially for us girls, the hormonal imbalance is a nightmare and it does affect our psyche.. there is also life events always happening and affecting our mental health.. but the most important part is that you never stop, never give up, you keep walking your path of healing and you keep asking for help! I always say that the keys to having a good experience with therapy are the 3Ps: perseverance, patience and practice!

I have been in therapy for I think 3 years next month, and proudly I can say we don't have the scheduled regular sessions, I do not need them anymore, Alhamdullillah, now it is basically only in cases of emergency like if something really intense happens, other than that, Alhamdullillah I am capable of managing my anxiety attacks, which are neither that frequent not that intense anymore, Alhamdullillah.

P.s. I did not mention trauma because tbh with my therapist we haven't been working on that. And I am well-aware of how sensitive and different our traumatic experiences are, so I chose to sit this one out.

Anyways, I hope I managed to answer your questions or at least bring you some hope! And again, I am very proud of you, I know how gard and tricky it gets but I promise you it gets better, so keep going 🤍

[apexulansis]

having just gotten out of the shower loni had donned nothing ( truly nothing ) but a long t-shirt. tip toeing down the stairs and into the living room she spots a large, furry figure sitting ( somewhat stiffly as if he felt guilty for being inside- at least that was the energy she was getting ) on the couch.

"hey youse..." an almost magnetic pull tugs her towards him and she is quick to take a perch 'pon his lap. her thighs are forced to spread, bare flesh now fully against him. one hand falls to his chest while another rakes through the fur near his neck, fingers curling back around to his nape. without thinking she shifts forward, effectively grinding into him. she wonders, briefly, if he could feel there was nothing hiding her womanhood from him. the thought is enough to bring a rosiness to her cheeks, but she swallows back the nerves. "you seem tense. is there anything I can do to help...?"

It was nothing personal. Ardaka rarely relaxed when he was inside the home of somebody else. He felt like an outsider here — no doubt a sensation exacerbated by the fact that he was, in fact, a being hiding on a planet he did not belong to. The fact that Loni, too, had something to hide from the others. In that way and many others she was a kindred spirit. He relaxed here more than he did most places… Still, the tension hadn't entirely left his rigid posture.

As usual, he smelled Loni first. His ears craned when the clean, floral scent reached his nostrils, inclined to hear her approach. Her footfalls were light enough that he entertained the idea that she might've been trying to sneak up on him… Considering that, he humoured her, letting ears relax back to their former position, letting no trace that he already knew she was there be read in the way he sat, back faced to her.

Little did he suspect that his surprise would actually be genuine. Not when she speaks to him— just afterwards when she curls into his lap. Rather… Not so much did she curl as she did straddle it. Ardaka chokes out the startled yet intrigued sound that trills up his highest throat. Sometimes it was easy to miss that sort of suggestion from another species, but this was.. forward. Not expected, but not unwanted. He would have been a liar, after all, had he claimed he never even sparingly thought of being closer. He simply respected Loni and cherished their bond as it was too much to consider acting on any such desire for fear he might taint it. But what was there for him to ruin when she was the one getting closer to him?

“Ah— khorat, anûn.” His mind lagged, his reply spoken in Zahhan instead of something comprehensible. That's when he blushed, partially spurred on by a sudden powerful shyness for his increasingly effected reaction, but mostly because of the she-wolf in his lap.

He hadn't yet dared a lower glance, dilated eyes fixed upon her face. But he could still smell her, and more than he could before. Not only that, but he could feel her, too— though, the action wasn't quite as notable against him as it would be a human male or something external. Would be a disappointment? What was she expecting? On that thought, his pupils dart downwards for a split second as if to confirm that she was as close to him as she currently felt. She was.

“Uh—” Ardaka stammered, then cleared his throat. For all his fluster, he didn't want to give her the impression that it was a negative reaction. He feels his heartbeat as if it were in his throat, and wondered if she could feel it through her fingers. Needing another pause to think of a response, in the meantime he willed himself to move his hands; the larger set upon her outer thighs, and the other, smaller set upon her waist, where the talon of each thumb curved in to brush against her hipbones. “Your simple presence always improves my mood. No matter what you're doing.” Another, quieter noise in his throat. “But I'm, ah, interested in what you're doing right now…”

Without thinking, he acted on sudden impulse and lifted one large hand to carefully card his nails through her hair. He drank in her scent again, through nose and maw, tasting the intricacies in it with indulgent ease. A contemplative hum thrummed in his chest, almost a purr. “You smell captivating, Loni.”

[frostycatblr-fandom-files]

Baby Brothers - Faro's Telling

Warnings and Information: Uh… oops? Out of my 18+ Clone OCs, Faro was supposed to be my *ONE* OC who did not have a proper/creative backstory for his name out of everyone who appeared in the NTMYB story that has since spiraled into a series. But I had an idea. This takes place before NTMYB, so rather than break the in-house rule of using their names before they actually get them, or make up CT designations that will just get confusing (and I’ll forget later), everyone's dialogue gets color-coded. Apologies, and warning, for eyestrain. This will not be a regular story-telling method. Star Wars and real-world swearing. No Mando'a here. Narrative and stylistic use of italics.

Word-count: 2,633

Key: Faro, Gunnar, Cryfar, Fluke, Canvas

By Kamino's three moons, why did he have to get pulled out of the cloning tanks first? Now he feels like he's supposed to shoulder all blame and fault for his brothers until their training is completed. It's lousy. He never asked for this! And what's worse, is he has some of the most patience-testing batchmates possible out of this whole Growth Cycle… 

The whole of the Growth Cycle gets shipped out next year. Perhaps several hundred healthy adult men within a single Cycle (he doesn't keep track of the numbers) all fit and ready to fight for the Republic. Hundreds of batches of brothers. 

Batches of brothers made up of fives. 

"All four of you are going to make me gray before we're even shipped out…" he finds himself muttering as he tasks himself with taking care of them out of a sense of obligation. Of responsibility. Brotherhood. "Kriffing hells, stop it. We're supposed to be practicing for our weapons disassembly, would you quit messing with the other two?"

"I'm helping them! One of their parts got lost. Help me find it before the trainer sees!"

One of them is cocky and impulsive sometimes, another underwent a massive personality shift in the last two years that does not seem related to developing a unique identity, and the youngest two are so kriffing hard to separate. Second youngest can be easily distracted and just as unlucky as the third. The youngest… constantly breathing down his neck and inventing excuses to stay close. 

They get shipped out next year. They're all almost fully-grown, and none of them have Names. 

He's just the oldest out of choice. So he feels he has to be mature and steadfast and a teacher for his baby brothers… He takes the worst of it from the Trainers. Either because he thinks he has to as the oldest, and therefore the example, or because he’s made the scapegoat. For some reason it’s his fault that one brother keeps getting a DC-17 hand blaster and a DC-15S mixed up when they do drills on each model. It's his fault when the oldest brother after him loses his cool. It's his fault that the youngest are distractible and shy and never feel like socializing with their other Clone-brothers outside of their batch. 

It's his fault because he's the oldest. He's only trying to be a good example. He's only trying to take care of them. But he's got four baby brothers and only two hands to take care of them all… he tries so, so hard to, anyways.

Two hands that have been trained to do so much damage can only be so soft sometimes. 

But Maker, he's trying. He's been trying so hard ever since they were little and when "babying" was more acceptable. Well just because they're nearly men, it doesn't mean they stop being his little brothers. Because he was pulled out of the Cloning tube first, these four are his baby brothers; now, forever, always. 

They annoy him, yes. But he loves them… and he loves them by protecting them before they ever set foot off of Kamino, when it will become impossible to do so. When he understands the risks that he will lose them - or they lose him - to war against the Separatists and all those who would oppose the Republic. Risks he is prepared for, but selfishly does not want to accept. 

These are his brothers. Come stormy seas or blaster fire, that will not change. Not even men like Jaccynn will change this. 

And Jaccynn is in a mood today. A particularly nasty one. "That was sloppy, CT-xxxx! Again!" 

"S-sorry, Sir! Yessir!" his middle batchmate pants, daubing his brow on the edge of his sleeve. His training uniform is soaked with sweat new and old. The training center stinks of musk and petrichor from hundreds of brothers engaged in hand sparring. He snaps all his limbs in starting position, but his knees soon begin to wobble. He's too tired to keep this up for much longer. "I-I'm upping keep as best as I can! I mean I'm keeping up!" 

That's been happening a lot more lately; the word confusion. But it's just subtle enough that the Kaminoans haven't caught on, or don't have enough of a reason to look into these reports. 

Words from the smuggled datapad from their classrooms come back to him. 

Possible brain injuries. Minor aphasia. 

His middle brother is likely suffering with minor aphasia, and there's nothing he can do about it. Except exercise yet more patience… patience that would not be shown by the Trainers. So he has to be creative and crafty with his words and his excuses when Jaccynn oversees their combat readiness. 

"Wait. It's been ten minutes since your last sip of water," he warns his brother, grabbing his bottle from the stack and bravely crossing into the combat mat's boundaries to take it to him, "And our brothers in the medical center keep reminding you that the reason you passed out last time was because you were dehydrated, CT-xxxx." Ordinarily he would not let another brother lean on him like this, having to fully support the tugging weight that threatens to take him to the floor like a bored child hanging off a parent's wrist who's too old for such behavior. But he makes exceptions for his batchmates. He has to. He sees his brother is not as fine as he claims between long, drawn-out pulls from the bottle. 

"I'll be fi-fine!" comes the unconvincing insistence after a particularly violent sway, "I'll begot this!" 

There's a loud snickering behind the two of them. "You'll kriffing what now?" 

"What did I say?" He doesn't get what's so funny about what he said, as usual. That is also a more recent problem. One that he just has to hope doesn't get any worse, or they might take his brother away from him and never be seen again. He can't let that happen. "What'd he say I said?" 

"Ignore him. Focus, brother. You're almost done, c'mon. Be ready as soon as I get off the mat." His brother has to focus. And the second oldest needs to get a hold of himself too, he can't just make these unfiltered comments out in the open. Not in front of this trainer who oversees the instruction of this Growth Cycle. 

The trainer who calls himself Jaccynn just sneers with disgust. He knows the water break was a clever tactic to stall his instruction, but he cannot delve into supplying punishments for interruptions the way he would like. So he goes about it a different way: giving the losing combatant no time to prepare himself. "Okay, now that you've had your cute little pep talk it's time to get serious… Ready. Set. Begin!" 

He's hardly had the time to brace himself to be laid out on his back, and the air bursts from his lungs in a harsh wheeze as the winning challenger makes his first and only move necessary to complete the round. He's so damn dazed that he can only grin stupidly up at the Clone brother above him asking if he's okay. 

The impulsive streak is rearing its head again. "Why that-"

"Sit your ass down, you're not a charging Reek." He pulls his brother back down with a fistful of his uniform. Retaliation is just going to spur Jaccynn on and take it out on more of his little brothers. He's sung this song and danced this dance for years now with Jaccynn. 

"But Jaccynn didn't give him enough time to get ready, I should feed him his teeth!" 

"I saw it too, mynock-brain." 

Though nearly fully-grown, the youngest are crawling on their hands and knees to avoid being noticed by the hired instructor as they try to get their brothers to stop arguing. To his memory, of all his baby brothers, these two are the only ones who have not fully abandoned this behavior when they're all supposed to be seated on the floor.

They don't opt for shuffling along on their knees like most other brothers. His batchmates are far from being like most other brothers. 

"Cut it out, guys!" the second youngest pleads, using his body as a buffer between his oldest two brothers with the help of the youngest. Their faces are probably warm with anxiety as warm as their bark-brown eyes that implore them to get along. Privileges that come with being batch-babies. 

The four of them really, really test his patience, but he wouldn't trade them for any other Batch, deep down. These are his batchmates. These are his brothers. Maker help him if he ever stopped loving them so much… 

"Alright, alright, stop. Go pester him. I'm going to make sure he's okay." Privileges that come with being the two oldest means it takes just a few words to settle the others down. And, if you're annoyed enough, you make it the other's problem. Again, where these any other brothers but his batchmates, he would not be quite as tolerant of someone nearly fully-grown trying to share his shadow. "He's probably just had his bucket rung, again. Look at him, he's grinning like an Acklay. He'll be okay." 

The simple fact he's sitting up and laughing it off bodes mostly well, at least. Second and third oldest are now joking that the third has probably seen more stars than a spacer, and he's never even left Kamino yet. "You're setting a galactic record!"

"Hell yeah!" 

Maker, those two were certainly going to make him gray before he was ten. But at least the youngest would keep him softer and kinder. "Stop gnawing on your nails, little brother." 

"Sorry…"

"I'm not angry anymore, it's-"

He shakes his head rapidly. "It's Jaccynn. He scares me." That's fair enough, he concedes. Jaccynn hasn't exactly made himself a popular Trainer with the Clones. More than one Clone-brother has wanted nothing more than to feed him his teeth for berating them, or picking on the batch-babies. That seems to be his thing. Jacc hates that across most of the facility, younger brothers are often afforded a little more leniency. 

Cared for a little more until the next Growth Cycle is old enough to really roughhouse with the rest of them. They still can, granted; it's just that they don't want to accidentally hurt any of their brothers while they're still growing, still learning. 

"All you damn Clones look the same, how can you possibly tell who's younger than you?" 

It was impossible to explain how you just knew, or why exactly they did it, but of course they could absolutely tell who was younger than them even without being explicitly told. You're older than your batchmates by mere minutes. So when you age and grow and change as fast as they do, they have to find some way of establishing a sense of… normalcy. Maybe this was something that was passed down to them from the very first generation of Clones, or something that someone saw on the Holonet and really liked the idea of. 

A living sea of hundreds and thousands and millions of brothers, of course they'd behave a lot alike "traditional" brothers in some ways. But they're a lot more unalike than nat-born brothers… they don't tend to Name one another. 

"What about Fang?"

He scoffs, insulted. "What am I, a massiff? Pass."

"I dunno, you seem like an Axel to me." 

He shakes his head again. Someone else in the neighboring batch (below them) is considering that Name. It's bound to happen, but you try to avoid too many name duplicates within a Growth Cycle.

"Rachet?" 

That's not a bad name, but no. ("Stop chewing your nails or I'll have to hold your hand.")

His middle brother gives him a woozy smile as he's helped down to medical, again. "I think he's more of a… Ozone. Yeah, I kinda like it… That's a nice name…"

"Are you sure you don't want that name for yourself?" He offers as he helps his brother into a chair and lets a medic know that yeah, it's them again, who else? while doing his best to keep him upright. 

"I'llthinkaboutit." That's fine, he promises. Only half-jokingly he replies he's more concerned about keeping them in one piece on Kamino so they can go and fight for the Republic. "There's plenty of time to find names, little brother. Even if that's when we leave Kamino." Away from Jaccynn who mocks every last name choice. Away from the bounty hunter who's only training soldiers of the GAR for a promised sum, not because he genuinely wants to make any kind of difference. But because he must feel small without hundreds who have to listen to him, one of those types of people. "One day, brothers… we'll find Names, and I won't have to keep thinking of you by your favorite colors. I'll think of you by your Names. One day I'll stop sounding like such a jackass in front of the others when I have to refer to you by CT numbers."

"Is that why you call me Yellow?"

"What am I?" His youngest brothers look at him with wide, imploring eyes. These two have always been so expressive. "Me?"

"Privately: I'm Red," he answers with a gentle chuckle, "yes, you are Yellow." he tells him with a nod, and ruffling the soft, fluffy curls of the second and then the youngest's last, he adds "You're Blue. And Orange seems to be your favorite color. That leaves our dizzy brother over here as Green."

"Green's not a creative color for a Name…" he complains softly, dodging the pinpoint of light from the otoscope in the medic's hands as he tries to check the pupils. 

"What do I use instead then?" 

He whines softly and shrugs while he tries to swat the otoscope away. "I dunno… no-go-awaaay." (He's never liked how much they have to use the otoscope on him when trying to figure out the root cause of his confusion and word-swapping.) 

"Then for just now, I'll stick with Green, okay?" 

"Eh… sure." he concedes before he allows the medic to do his job with no further complaints, since 'Red' offers his hand to hold. He's already holding 'Orange''s hand just so he settles down. Three Kaminoans have entered the medical wings. They've always made him a little nervous, much like a lot of things; he speculates that Orange has a lot of masked nervousness…

"Don't think about the long-necks…" he whispers, nudging his youngest batchmate to turn his back on the Kaminoans. "Just think about us, or what you want your Name to be. Anything but them. You're okay. So long as I'm here." 

He'd make sure of it. For all of them. He's just minutes older than them, and he never wanted to be the oldest… but for them? Maker. As much as they drive him crazy, he'd probably burn down the galaxy for them if it would keep them safe. 

These are his baby brothers. And he loves them. 

Everything. He'd do everything again in a damn heartbeat. 

He just needs to make sure if he gets another chance, another life, that he does a lot of things differently. That he stands up to Jaccynn sooner, and defends his batchmates more. That he tells his brothers he loves them, not just showing them through acts of service or sacrifice. Apologizes to his superior officers for being so closed off and stoic all the time. Thank the other brothers who showed friendship and offered their help to the youngest of his batch. 

But more important than anything else is that he explains why his name is FARO…

Note from Frost: Don't have much of an explanation for this other than "creative exercise that I don't hate", taking the advice of just writing for myself on occasion, and exploring more of what made Faro tick. This ties in most directly to "Nice To Meet You, Brother" and "I Have No Mother, Only A Brother" within the OC "lore".

[Masterlist] [Clone OC Masterlist]

[servin-up-surveys]

survey #230

When was the last time you consumed alcohol? Good question, idk.

Are you interested in creative writing of any sort? Sure am, I do forum animal RP as a major hobby.

Can you ever see yourself and your ex back together? No, not with any ex.

Did you get ice cream from the ice cream truck when you were little? Do they still have an ice cream truck where you live? Sometimes, yeah. I don't know if we still have them.

What has been the most traumatic experience of your life? Does it still bother you? Losing my first real boyfriend that I made my entire identity and source of happiness and worth. I've healed A LOT and it doesn't bother me much anymore, but I have my moments, especially if I'm listening to a song that brings me back.

Where was the last place you got completely wasted? I've never been drunk.

Have you ever changed the prices of items at a store? Not when it wasn't my job. I might not have ever even gotten to this point on the jobs I had where this was a relevant duty, but I feel like I have before.

Would your parents disown you if you got pregnant? No, I'm a grown-ass adult with parents that thankfully love and support me.

Are you going to any concerts or festivals this summer? I'm sure I'm not.

Any baby names you think you might name your future kids? If Girt and I actually had kids, Miquella or Mikella Lynn and/or Sage Llane.

When was the last time you had sex? I'm going to be the 30 y/o virgin and no I'm not happy about it, but I try to be understanding of my partner's no less than debilitating performance anxiety.

Think back to your most important relationship, was it all your fault it’s over? I honestly think Girt is my most important relationship, and it's not over.

What’s your favorite color? Shades of pink. Mostly lighter ones.

Ever had a black eye? No.

Did your most recent kiss take place in/on a bed? No, his car. He was too tired to come in that night.

Has anyone seen you naked in the last 6 months? No. Even with Girt, I never FULLY take all my clothes off because I'm just too self-conscious. He's basically seen everything at one point or another, I just don't care. I'm more comfortable and less rigid when I'm covered in some places, my lower legs especially.

Last person to cuddle with? Girt.

Do you prefer hot or cold drinks overall? Cold.

Do you know how to tie a tie? No.

Are you a fan of hot chocolate? Do you like it plain or do you prefer to add things like whipped cream or marshmallows? Yes, completely plain. I don't like the texture of whipped cream and once the marshmallows start to dissolve, I don't like that texture, either.

What caused your last injury? I stubbed my fucking toe super hard. I shattered the toenail.

What’s the smallest thing you’ve ended a relationship over? Nothing "small." There were all valid reasons.

Would you rather order a starter (appetizer) or a dessert? Or would you be able to manage a full three courses? Usually, appetizer. I can RARELY manage a full three courses, I'm gonna be suffering.

How do you get most of your news, if you pay attention to it at all? Ha, Facebook, honestly.

Have you or a member of your family been diagnosed with COVID yet? I as well as multiple other family members have gotten COVID at one point or another.

Are you a vegetarian? If so, what persuaded you to stop eating meat? If not, is it something you’d ever consider? No. I had a phase where I tried, but it is simply not sustainable for me. I am too picky with my autism. I would be malnourished if I really tried to dedicate my life this way.

Do you prefer rice or pasta? Pasta, but I enjoy both.

Did you do laundry yet today? If not, do you need to do any before you go to bed? I admittedly don't do my own laundry; my mom likes to do our laundry together to save resources. I am responsible for putting my clothes away, though, once she separates them into baskets.

Have you ever had a friend that you found extremely annoying but put up with anyway? I wouldn't consider that person my friend, soooo...

Who was the last person you sat beside at a restaurant? My mom.

Peaches or plums? Peaches, I guess. I like both. I eat peaches far more.

Do you read books or magazines more? Books.

Would you ever dye your hair blonde? No, only for the purpose of adding color to it.

Who was the last person you took a picture with? Uh... I think Girt?

Do you like Redbull? I've never tried it.

What’s the last kind of Vitamin Water you had? I don't drink it.

Do you like to kill people on the Sims? I was never into the human Sims, I only played two animal versions.

Have you used Limewire before? Of course I have.

Are you or were you in a band? No.

Is the taste of alcohol appealing to you? Not at all. That's why when I drink alcohol, it has to be very light and fruity stuff.

Was your first crush on a male or female? A guy.

Do you think you look better with long hair or short hair? Short.

Have you ever had to apply for disability? Yes, but I didn't get it.

How many of your grandparents are alive currently? None.

What are three emojis you use a lot? Crying, laughing, and the sparkly heart.

Do you follow any sort of special diet, and if so, what? No.

Have you ever had an eating disorder? No. I have binge-eating tendencies, but I don't think it's with enough regularity to be considered a disorder.

Do you have any bruises on you? No.

Are you ticklish? Very.

Did you reject or accept your last friend request? Reject, it was some rando.

Did you have a good childhood? Mostly, yes. There were negatives, especially with my dad and the dangerous neighborhood I grew up in, but in general I had a good childhood.

What pets did you have when you were growing up? God, a lot. Cats, dogs, a lizard, ball pythons, mice, rats, hamsters, gerbils, fish, guinea pigs, my sister had a rabbit, and I might be forgetting some.

Would you ever date someone who had issues with substance abuse? No, I am not getting involved in that.

[TW: CHILD LOSS] Do you know anyone who has had a miscarriage? I know a number of people. This is sadly not uncommon at all.

What’s your last ex's opinion of you? She'd probably be happy to see me dead, and I don't think that's an exaggeration. Shame on me for not keeping someone's confessed Nazism a secret.

Are there any major drama queens in your family? Yep.

Do you like Stephen King novels? I've never read any.

What is one adventurous thing you’d be willing to do? (ex: skydive) Cave exploration, but not in narrow cave systems. I don't fuck with that. I'd only be willing to explore wide caves and not go TOO terribly deep.

How many email accounts do you have? Two that I actually use.

Does the place you work have music playing? What sort? I don't have a job.

What’s your favourite type of donut? Either just glazed or chocolate frosted.

Has someone ever tried to start an argument with you over Facebook? What happened? Oh for sure. Sometimes I'll just ignore people, but more often than not, I'll argue my point. This happened recently and the woman realized she was wrong and just changed her focus entirely and replied in this really funny "oops I fucked up" sorta way. She literally wanted to argue that images you find on Google are never modified or AI, they're cold hard facts. I couldn't fucking believe it.

When you’re at home, do you spend most of your time in your room? No, I'm in the spare room. I lived in bed in my bedroom too long and it was terrible for me.

Do you have a hard time admitting you’re wrong? Not really, no. I suppose this could depend on the topic, but in general, I'm definitely willing to admit when I realize I'm wrong.

When were you the saddest in your life? After the breakup with Jason.

Who in your family has been married the longest? (and how long?) idk

Do you take your shoes off when you come inside? Yes.

What was the first social media site you ever used? MySpace.

Have you ever been catcalled? Not to my recollection.

Have you ever cut your own hair? Nah.

Are you a fan of video games? Yes. I'm not as obsessed as I was when I was younger, but I still enjoy them.

What’s your favorite color combination? Black and gold.

Has anyone besides your family seen you naked? If so, who? Jason, *basically* Girt, I talked about this recently. Oh, I remember as a young child taking a bath with my best friend.

Do you know how to use Photoshop? Yeah. I'm not a graphic design expert or anything, but I know a good deal, especially when it comes to photography-related functions.

Do you have the right time set on your microwave? Yes.

Have you ever been arrested? For what? No.

Where did you go today? Lunch with Tobey for Mom's birthday. Shortly we'll be going to dinner with my sisters.

Where is your favorite person? Maybe at work now? He has to do night shift for a while and I hate it.

What mode of transport did you take to high school? My mom drove me. Occasionally I would ride home with Jason on the bus to his house.

Have you ever made an item of clothing? No.

Who was the last person who cooked something for you? A cook at the restaurant.

Who was the last person who touched your hair? Besides me, Girt probably.

What was the last vegetable you ate? Green beans.

When was the last time you had a sleepover? Girt hasn't slept here in months, we don't do that a lot. He sleeps fine, I usually don't. I need a bigger bed.

[fumifooms]

Thistle rarepairs

As start of my “Dunmeshi rarepairs I will birth with my own hands if I have to” series

I’ve been reading dunmeshi enjoying everyone’s dynamics with everyone and multishipping a bit in my head for optimal serotonin but… I think I’ve settled on some ships I particularly enjoy, and of COURSE I’m alone in them. They’d be so interesting to have fics about them, sob… Which, on that topic, how the HELL are there so little Dungeon Meshi fics?!!!  I’ll make a post for every ship but I’mma start by bundling the Thistle ones together, if ya wanna see my other ones just browse the dungeon meshi tag on my blog.   I kinda ship marcille with everyone, ship thistle with everyone, Laios with a lotta people… But I eventually had to find my niche, my otp, and… some stuck out of the lot. FICTIONAL MENTALLY ILL JERKS ARE INTERESTING I’M SORRY

Thistle x Falin

The biggest part is that I think it’d be interesting for Thistle to have one actual ally and person who cares for him, and find that in the tool he dismisses. He never really seemed to understand that an extra soul got mixed into the dragon, somehow. It’d be interesting to see him gradually understand it was more than a form change, then realizing that means he actually has someone in his corner, as a supportive presence. He’s been alone for how long again? Falin is a ray of sunshine, and that’s what Thistle needs I think. Actual and heartfelt companionship. The dragon is forcibly devoted to him, but it’s Falin who extends extra care and attentions. We’ve seen esp with Thistle summoning the bunch of dragons that even monsters who have to listen to the dungeon lord still retain individuality and a certain degree of free will.

But look looook Falin is the thing that allowed Thistle to calm down and think things through, she grounds him.

Look at her lil nod at the end, she doesn’t dislike him <3 (Even tho the other dragons he summoned def found him annoying at the very least so it’s not a forced devotion mind control issue)

Thistle and Falin, sitting on a web, o-b-s-e-s-s-i-n-g!

Pathetic meow meow x ultimate cinnamon roll basically. A cinnamon roll that will turn to bloody murder only for him, and is kinda aware and okay with that?? I can’t wait to see how Falin will react to Thistle when she’s revived in the last chapters… There’s a parallel here to be found as well, Falin is fully devoted to Thistle, like how Thistle is fully devoted to Derghal. Falin’s biggest goal is to protect the people she loves, like Thistle with his family. They have some interesting subtle similarities…

AND. Also they are both natural born magical geniuses. Falin was ostracized for it while Thistle was lifted up for it though, but yes they were both treated differently for it and it affected them, also gaining a sense of responsibility due to it as well.

Marcille x Thistle

It’d be interesting, I had thoughts about it with them battling it out for dungeon lord title and being both mage elves with personalities clashing… And then he “died” holding her hand so hah! That’s a win in my books.

Yes so it has interesting potential due to a few things. Dungeon master x person desperate to study dungeons, the hand holding just as he died (She just happened to be the closest to him when he was dying, but I still think that speaks of potential future dynamics they could have had. The last thing he did was reach out for help and companionship. He mocked her for being a half-elf, and yet his last wish and hope is entrusted to her), the whole elf mage thing they have matching which means they share an area of study aka interests and conversation topics, but most of all it’s the tragic narrative of it y’know. I think in another universe, if Thistle had allowed Marcille a conversation as she had requested, she could have positively influenced him. If Marcille pacified him and they spoke- oh I have no doubt she’d piss him off which could be a fun dynamic in non life-threatening scenarios lol, but he could answer her questions about dungeons, pertaining to her goals and dreams, and I think he’d gain a smart and capable companion along the way. Someone that would truly understand him and be able to intellectually ground him and argue it out to find the best solution. As a dungeon master, I think he would be maybe the best placed to make her rethink through her dream and dungeon plans as well, if she starts seeing him not as a fully insane guy (which means she thinks she would fare better as a dungeon lord than him), but an individual influenced by the Power. Like the manga pointed out early on, Marcille may be great at theoretics, but practice is ultimately the most important thing, and experience as a dungeon master is what Thistle has, exemplified with how he created an ecosystem that worked with the layers unlike Marcille who immediately disturbed everything.

They both just want to live peacefully and forever with their loved ones </3 yeah I think they’d understand each other better than anyone else. It’s very interesting to note that Thistle was an elf in a kingdom of humans/tallmen, who had seen generations of the royal family as seen through the paintings. Losing people was his greatest fear, like it is hers. Elf otherized for being an adopted elf in a kingdom of tallmen projecting his want of belonging onto her by thinking she wants to be a full half-elf… She just wanted to talk 😔 She isn’t afraid to call him out on his bullshit, y’know what good. They have a lot of parallels, like again long lived elf growing up around and surrounded by short lived loved ones. And that’s without mentioning the 1000 years thing… They could have a lot of existential convos and themes.

… Marcille x Falin x Thistle polycule You know, it’d be fun if Izutsumi interacted with Thistle as well, they’d duel to the death fr. I just want more Thistle content ok…

[jwzyreviews]

Book Review: "Kamikaze Boys" by Jay Bell

After dedicating his profound ability to create realistic characters and emotionally tugging plotlines to create the acclaimed, “Something Like” series, Author Jay Bell hits the hammer on the head once again, creating another gay romance novel that is sure to give you heart eyes and ALL the feels. Kamikaze Boys is an emotional, heart-warming, and emotion-evoking coming of age story told not only through the eyes of tense, reserved, frequently bullied 16 year old high school junior David,  but also through the eyes of the notoriously crazed and infamous super-senior Connor Williams. Kamikaze Boys is a delightfully written, well-thought out novel that tackles ideas of love, finding yourself, finding comfort and strength in others, and that if you’re going through life with the one who understands and loves you unconditionally, you can come through on the other side. 

Once you begin reading, you are thrusted into one of the many instances of bullying that David endures at the hands of Chuck, his fellow classmate and his own personal devil.  David experiences all the shortcomings that LGBTQ+ kids face, whether it be the scrutiny and harassment at the hands of typical homophobic entities like Chuck, or the silent, yet incredibly obvious distaste from his peers. Despite having a home-schooled best friend who he enjoys spending time with, David chooses to deal with Chuck, too fearful to stand up for himself. The reader also has the privilege of seeing the world and experiencing the story alongside Connor, the school’s super-senior who is rumored to be as crazy as he looked, who lives a rather different life than David. With now having the responsibility of being the oldest sibling in the house after his older sister moved to florida, caring for his little brother while also being the only other working adult in the house besides his mother, and going to school to finish out his last year of high school, you can tell that a lot is on his plate. However, after the destined meeting of Connor and David, and their impending friendship and eventual relationship, the two outcasts take on the world, falling more and more in love with each other as life comes at them in unexpected ways. 

One of the themes that I immediately took away from this novel is how quickly an idea of someone can not only spread, but solidify themselves to people's minds, only for the person to be quite the opposite.  Obviously as the reader, you are experiencing the story from the POV of the character (in this case, Connor and David) so we are able to decipher who they actually are, in comparison to the image that is made known to us reading. You’re immediately plunged into the world of David, who explains that the school knew he was gay before he was, and while he was still trying to figure himself out as a person, the school had already built this image of him. In the first meeting of the budding lovebirds, David’s idea of Connor was not that much of a good one, going off the countless rumors he has heard about him. He had his reservations, yet when Connor offered to be his “bodyguard”, he couldn’t say no. Connor had his own agenda, using his kid brother as a reason to get David to get into his car, and as an icebreaker to get both of them past the awkward silence, and onto speaking terms. After having an eye-opening conversation, which happened to be coated in the obvious budding attraction between both boys, David and Connor began to discover more about each other, as individuals, as people, and not what people have painted them out to be. Connor was so much more than what people said about him. He was family-orientated, considerate, and tremendously sweet, not at all the mysterious unhinged monster people made him out to be. His circumstances were better kept private, and once they were explained fully to David, it was rewarding to read how the image of Connor changed in David's eyes. He went from fearing him, being overly cautious and meek around him, to being open and comfortable around him, and eventually loving him unconditionally. 

One of the strengths of this novel is simply the blossoming relationship of David and Connor. Though the build-up wasn’t drawn out too much, the intensity in which they felt their emotions made up for how quickly these two began pursuing each other. After dwelling on their first kiss, as he sits in the parking lot of his job, it reads, “David was probably still floating along on a blissful cloud buoyed by romantic optimism. Connor intended to keep him afloat as long as possible…and if he was lucky, maybe David could help him find his way back to a place that he once thought lost. (Chapter 5, p.85). Earlier in the same chapter, Connor confesses how he’s never had a real relationship, and opted to explore his sexuality with meaningless hook-ups. Yet, hearing him talk about David in this way was such a delight to read as I believe words have intention, and words hold meaning. For Connor to want to be the one to keep David feeling loved, feeling wanted, feeling like he mattered was something that almost brought tears to my eyes. On the other side, David felt the same, if anything, he felt it more considering Connor was his first everything. His love for Connor was shown through one of my favorite quotes in this book, and it reads as follows, “The world could split down the middle, all the way to Hell, and if Connor was trapped on the other side, David would pull the globe back together again just to reunite them. If anything tried to get in their way, they would destroy those obstacles together. (Chapter 12, p.197).  In a relationship, one of the inevitable things that will happen is that you learn from each other. There were so many things that David and Connor not only learned about each other, but learned about themselves through being open with one another. From heart-touching conversations where they reveal their coming out stories, nights of pulling pranks on Chuck to punish him for his constant torment of David, to the night of their very first time exploring their love physically, these two fall deeper and deeper into a connection that was quite impossible to deny, even amongst the other characters in the story, from David’s own father, to David’s best friend Gordon, to even Chuck.  By the later half of the novel, David and Connor are truly riding for each other, even with David offering to wait for Connor while he serves a bid in jail after a situation involving Chuck. 

Jay Bell totally outdid himself with this book. After coming off reading the first couple entries in his “Something Like” series, something about this book hits a spot that even those books couldn't hit. In total, I have probably read this book a good 4 or 6 times since receiving it in the mail on September 9th, 2022. Something about this story, these characters, the lessons that you ultimately take away kept me coming back. While some may feel the story moved a bit fast, I believed that the pacing of this book was perfect, especially when it took place over the course of 6+ months. I also enjoyed the writing of this novel as I feel like you were able to delve emotionally into each chapter in a way that kept you wanting to read more and more. David’s love for Connor was such a pleasure to read, especially when you read about how he comes from a home with divorced parents, and deals with the struggle of feeling forgotten or disattached. In the same breath, imagining David comforting Connor in ways that he never experienced, loving him in ways he only dreamed of, and adapting to his life seamlessly was fulfilling in so many ways, and that is probably why I kept coming back to read it over and over again.  It was also a much light-hearted book in comparison to “All That’s Left In The World” or its sister books, “Something Like…, it was an intense, beautifully written book that I think everyone should take a chance at reading! 

Rating: 18/20 

Story/Plot 4/5

Characters/Character Development 4/5

Writing 4/5

Length/Pacing ⅗

Would I re-read this book? I have. 6 times. So YESSS.