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copperbadge · 2 months

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How did you find the doctor(s) who assessed you for ADHD? Im looking into the process of getting diagnosed because (although ive suspected I might have adhd for years now) I've been struggling a lot more lately and i want to try medication to see if it helps at all. Im trying to search for psychiatrists through my health insurance portal but the the results im getting are all for child/adolescent psychiatry specialists, and I dont think that'll be much help for an adult adhd assessment? Did you have an established therapist to refer you for your assessment or were you able to find a psychiatrist independently?

I actually just kind of had to freeform it, but that does mean I have some tips to share!

I will say, I have never once used a health insurance portal to find someone to treat me for anything. Often their search engine is fucked up and the information is sometimes out of date. I almost always either ask someone who I know has had similar issues if they have a recommendation, ask my treating physician if I have one, or just google until I find someone reputable-looking; any qualified medical center or professional will list what insurance they take anyway, and you can always ask when you make the appointment.

So here's the process for how to do that!

When I was first considering it, I asked a friend who'd had an evaluation that came back not-ADHD, which I liked because it meant we knew it wasn't like, a weird Adderall pill mill or something. I really wanted to have a professional and thorough evaluation because I knew myself and knew I was capable of gaming a questionnaire. The place she had her evaluation was unfortunately having some staffing issues; part of the reason it took me so long is that I played phone tag with them for ages -- I'd call, and regardless of what time of day I called, their scheduler would be "out", so I'd leave a message and never get a call back. Ultimately I said "I really need to talk to a human, because your scheduler has not returned any of my numerous calls" and they said they could transfer me to another office outside of Chicago (in the burbs). That was not going to be accessible to me, so I told them thanks but I'll go somewhere else. Then COVID hit and I was not going to go anywhere near a medical center unless I had to for about two years.

So, when I was making my second serious run at getting evaluated, I did what might be expected of me by longtime readers of this blog: I made a spreadsheet.

I want to caveat this up top with REALLY IMPORTANT CONTEXT: I did not do all of this in a single day. The process from starting research to making an evaluation appointment took about a month, and probably would have taken longer if I wasn't getting somewhat desperate. Do not push yourself to do this as a single act. Research alone is a multi-day process; some days I looked at the open tabs and only entered one tab's worth of information. It took me quite a bit of time to write the form email I sent inquiring about an assessment. It took me time to call the clinic back when they asked me to call to book the appointment. This is a series of steps, not a single leap.

So!

I was looking for a clinic rather than an individual, in part because I'd heard a couple of horror stories about people who went to a psychiatrist and just got argued with for an hour instead of actually getting evaluated. So I googled, and here are some key terms for you, chicago adult adhd assessment. Chicago obviously for the region, but "adult adhd" (putting it in quotes will help) is the important term that will help you filter out a lot of child psych stuff. A lot of what I looked at did included family or child assessment/therapy but were clear that they also evaluated adults.

Then I went through every legit-looking search result and noted down, in my spreadsheet, the name of the clinic/company, the contact phone and email, the URL, the physical location (I needed to be able to get to it fairly easily) and whether they took my insurance. Even if they didn't take my insurance (all but one did) I still put them into the spreadsheet so that if I found them again I could check the sheet and know I didn't need to investigate further. I also tended to bump more legitimate and friendly-looking places to the top of the sheet. And if I were going to do it again I would also look for one specific thing, which is an assessment guide of some kind.

The assessment guide may be something they only give you after you speak with them, so it's not a no-go if they don't have one on their website, but it basically tells you what generally will go on during the assessment, how long it will take, and what you should bring. A full assessment like I had is estimated to take 4-6 hours and they recommended I wear layers so I wouldn't be overly cold/warm in their office, and to bring a snack. That's the kind of information you want, duration of the assessment and what they recommend for you, to ensure that you're working with people who are thorough and care about your comfort.

So, I have this spreadsheet now of places to reach out to, which I know take my insurance and do adult assessment. In the spreadsheet I also had columns for what date I contacted them and whether they'd responded. I started reaching out via email, one per day, with the form email I'd written.

The form email basically said "I'm 42 with no previous diagnosis but I have a family history of autism and dyslexia. I've been told I should get assessed for ADHD, so I'm looking for a clinic that will do the assessment and takes (my insurance). I prefer to be contacted by email but if need be, my phone number is (phone number). Please let me know if you have any open appointments and what information you will need from me to book an evaluation with you." (You can always ask for more information about the actual evaluation process once they respond.)

If I didn't get a response within 24 hours, I moved on to the next, but I only greyed out the text in that line of the spreadsheet; I didn't disqualify/remove the nonresponsive ones because again, I wanted to make sure I kept that information in case they eventually did respond. I did this with about ten clinics, because I figured I must be able to find at least one in ten who could do the eval, and I could go back and research more if necessary.

I think the third or fourth one I reached out to was the first to respond, and I ended up going with them; I had a very positive experience in the assessment itself but it was a real pain in the ass getting the documentation from them -- they took about a month to go through the evaluation data (this is not abnormal but is rather longer than usual according to my psychiatrist) and they gave me an in-person-by-zoom report once it was ready. That said, it took another four months and the threat of reporting them to the state to get them to send me the text of the eval (in part because the evaluator left the clinic unexpectedly with my formal report not yet written). But that's something that's truly impossible to know until you're working with them, and highly unusual, so don't let concerns about that deter you. If you end up in that situation come hit me up and I'll tell you how I dealt with that.

My eval recommended an executive function coach, but if I haven't been able to func it by now I never will, so I thanked them for the recommendation and went looking for a psychiatrist unaffiliated with the clinic to prescribe me meds. There, the key words you're going to be looking for are again "adult adhd" but also "adult disability" and if you want medication that's less likely to be a huge fucking hassle, "medication management". My psychiatrist and I meet every two months to reup my prescription, but he doesn't require me to take a regular drug test or meet him in person in order to get a new scrip, as some people have encountered. We meet in person once or twice a year (I can't remember, it's due to a legal requirement in Illinois) but otherwise it's over zoom.

So yeah -- it's a process, but there are ways to streamline and manage it, and a few tripwires in place to make sure you don't end up screwed by the system. Definitely feel free to ask if you have questions, either here or if you want a more indepth conversation you can email me at [email protected]. GOOD LUCK!

#sam has adhd #adhd #evaluation

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miiilowo · 11 months

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You should make the list of ways you were correct anyways, just for fun ~

eh. sure. why not

Any time a post of mine about afton got a decent amount of notes (aside from fanart) there'd usually be comments on it complaining about how "those" fans [note: i am one of "those" fans] have no idea what his personality actually is, and that they water him down, woobify and mischaracterize him, all while listing things off that are just genuinely part of william's character. while yes, there are fans that DO do that, the stuff they talk about is almost never an actual example of this happening. this is likely due to people not viewing him as a person and just a bland cold serial killer with no personality whatsoever

obviously movie william is not 1:1 with game or book william, but they're gonna be similar in personality. so heres some stuff ive seen people complain was "mischaracterization" thats present in the movie:

hes emotional/sentimental and actually cares about things - william calls the owner of freddys sentimental when talking to mike about the pizzeria (and we all know the owner is william), he visibly regrets/is shocked by the fact he stabs vanessa, he gets really worked up when things dont go his way, very quick to anger, etcetera. one could argue that william is lying about being sentimental and just wants to give an excuse for why the place is still around, but there'd be no reason to do that, considering mike has no idea anyone even died there, let alone the fact HE killed the kids. we know williams sole motive for keeping the place around definitely isnt just sentimental reasons, but i doubt that what he said doesnt have at least an ounce of truth to it. he holds onto trophies from his kills as well if him keeping garretts toy plane is anything to go off of

he actually likes bunnies and has an affinity for them - he has a rabbits foot on his keyring and has a letter/paper holder that's rabbit shaped. the letter holder isnt actually in any shots, but it was present on set on his desk

his personality isnt one note and dull/cold, and hes superstitious & a little offputting/jittery - the rabbits foot on his keyring ties into this idea, because if he actually believes it to be a good luck charm, then it shows some "quirkiness" for lack of a better term that people adamantly refuse to admit is in his personality. this also shows how hes superstitious, which is an idea thats present in the books, and people also like to pretend he isnt. he pokes fun at mike in a somewhat lighthearted way multiple times, he has a has a FRAMED PARTICIPATION AWARD on his wall for christs sake. the kids hair colors match the animatronics they were stuffed into (minus bonnie). he matched them. he made them match he paired them up for fun. not only that, but he gets visibly nervous and antsy when he realizes who mike is, and clearly really wants him to take the job. gets kind of weird. gets a kinda strange. he likes when things match afterall (symmetry, my friend!)

he's theatrical and over the top in personality on purpose (this is also essentially an argument for the last point) - in the books he goes on and on about performance and how he viewed both dave miller & springtrap as characters he plays, and i seriously wouldn't doubt that it'd be the same here, considering how cartoonishly evil he is while wearing the springbonnie suit. the voice changer, the little flourishes he adds to his speech, the fact he wipes off the knife when there wasnt any blood on it in the first place. for what. for what reason other than for pizzazz and intimidation points. the "oh, this is going to be so much fun!" line, and especially his playful demeanor disappearing the second he takes off the mask

he cares about his kids/likes kids - his expression when he stabs vanessa and she falls to the ground says enough i think. obviously hes not a GOOD parent, but being a good parent and caring about your kids are two wildly different things. you can be abusive and still care. most abusers dont process that they are abusers but thats a conversation for another time. william prioritizes himself over anyone else, but he still looks shocked after he stabs his daughter, and i refuse to blame that on bad acting because its MATTHEW LILLARD. the training tape for mike also states that he enjoyed entertaining kids, and yes, while that could be a lie, do you seriously think the creator of what essentially is chuck e cheese would actually despise children. the fact he gives garretts toy plane to vanessa could be a point toward him in this department as well, though its also just as likely he collects them as trophies. i like to think its a mix of both

i included these points specifically because i also have a plethora of evidence for them from both the books and the games, and theyre the ones i most commonly see people stating are unrealistic for afton.

its not a lot of stuff, but its not like he has a lot of screentime. lets be real

i do ADORE how egotistical and shortsighted they made him in the movie, though everyone can generally agree on that being a staple trait of his

#william afton #steve raglan #aftonisms #this is what i can recall off the top of my head #fnaf movie spoilers

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rqbossman · 2 months

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Hello Mr Bossman! (and possibly anyone else who reads this)

Its an honour to be here, I have a few questions. First i appologise for the long paragraph, you may dismiss it for the questions at the bottom. For context, i am here after finishing TMA and being up to date with TMAP, i then went over and listened to RQG, and have just finished listening to Epilogue 3 and might i just say, good sir I am grateful for your podcasts. I am currently just a few months away from my final exams of High School, and as someone who even just 1 year ago was very lost, struggling with school and being just overwhelmed. TMA isnt exactly comforting, but the characters and plot managed to serve as a good form of escapism while sorting myself out. I found my self engaging more in creative things that i had originally put aside in favour of maths and science (which i hated but thought i needed to do). I started drawing again, even if just fanart. and i found things going well. By finding podcasts, story telling and these communities have helped me in my own understanding of what i want in life. I got an ADHD diagnosis earlier this year, and almost directly after started RQG and as my first hyperfixation (that i was aware of as an hyperfixation) gosh dang it hit hard. (in a good way). Ive been able to do so much more creative writing and drawings, and got re-involved with a small dnd group with some friends who i played one game with almost 4 years ago now. So overall, inspirational sounds cringe, but it was. Im doing my best with the upcoming exams, but trying to get in to Medicine is not my only prority, and the fact ive been re-introduced to my first love (Literature and story telling), im planning to go do an Arts degree and i know i wouldnt have been able to confidently make this decision, or even have survived this long in the school system without the work you and your coworkers do. Now the sap is out of the way, Question time! (if you could answer even just one of these questions it would be so cool)(they go in order of RQ relevant to random stuff)(dont feel pressured to answer all/any. i know i wrote alot): 1. what would you say is the best way to draft out a long-form story. (with "Erasing the Line" as an example) Did you start at the end, with the links to the overarching plot.

2. When working with the players (in a form of TTRPG), what did you do to make sure you didnt miss relevant timing of plot points/ avoid creating spoilers while still giving enough detail?

3. What are good places to start with making a job out of storytelling/voice acting/audio etc. In the case of RQ, how is this a job and where do i sign up please! /j (what i mean is, how is best way/how did you find all the people involved and was there a common path that you were all on before getting to where you are now?) 4. Do you have recommendations for Terry Pratchett Books, i may be an literary-leaning student, but it seems i have never actually properly read any of his books. so where is best place to start?/What did you read first?

5. Similar authors or similar inspirations? Did you have a favourite podcast you listen to in your free time that you havnt had a hand in producing/directing/working on. 6. Favourite song/album/artist. And more specifically, what you like listening to in background when doing either writing or (for ttrpg) character research/game planing. 7. Since the olympics are on at the moment, what has been your favourite sport to watch, if you have been watching at all. Thank you for your time :)

Thankyou for all the kind words. Knowing our work is helping people really keeps our engines fired up. Let's see if I can't answer your questions: 1. I "sandbox" which is where I just shove everything I can think of into an unorganised bullet point list. Characters, setting, plot, all of it in one big mess. Then I decide what type of story you want to tell, copy and paste to a new document and then start to organise the thoughts (with the sandbox on standby if new stuff comes in I don't know what to do with). I think of it like scultping, you cut away bits and reshape until something comes out the other end that is story shaped. Only then do I attempt to build the sandcastle and put something coherant together like a synopsis or scratch draft etc.

2. Very tricky. I did a complete review and update of all notes after each recording session and don't forget the audio eas edited. I made lots of gaffs that you never heard as audience.

3. I contacted anyone I could convince to take part and just proved I was serious by overworking. I don't reccomend that route. Unfortunately it really is "who" you know. That doesn't mean chase established professionals as much as it means you need to get out there and associate with other up-and-comers who match your vibe. For me the route was long and windy and not a particularly good example. 4. I normally recommend people do not read his books in publication order. Don't get me wrong, its wonderful watching his craft grow from one title to the next but I would recommend new readers tip their toe into his later works to see if they like where he ended up before committing the time. I often recommend 'Monstrous Regiment' as people's first one. My favourite though is 'Thief of Time.'

5. I don't get much time to listen to podcasts in the last couple of years. I used to listen to a lot of non fiction. 'Stuff you Should Know' and that ilk. I also read a fair amount of classic YA fiction to unwind (Windinsger trilogy, Bartimeous, stuff like that.) 6. Paul Simon's Graceland but when working I assemble a playlist for each seperate project that is tonally appropriate. If I really need to focus I listen to Classical Minimalism. Or the Old School Runescape soundtrack. I'm allowed to be ecclectic. 7. I am actually in an incredibly busy work crunch at the moment so haven't seen any of it!

#alexander j newall #honest #rusty quill #personal life #advice

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chilewithcarnage · 9 months

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I, a very white and somewhat privileged person, am absolutely terrified to draw colored people. Because I don’t know if I’d cross the thin line of tasteful and authentic or racist and stereotypical…

Lol for starters don't refer to us as coloured people. This ain't 1955. Secondly my best advice to you is to use references of actual people of color. I would highly recommend staying away from those white men art station youtuber type artists for tutorials because they get a majority of their techniques and style from main stream video games and comic books, which to put it nicely don't have the best reputation for representing women and poc. tangent over, so yeah references. real life photographs of brown and black people.

pinterest is a site that a lot of current, especially younger artists like to use, but in all honesty it's not a very good source for someone trying to learn the fundamentals. it'll mainly show you 20 something year old ig and twitter models which is okay if you wanna just draw pretty people; but not the best if you wanna like I said learn fundamentals + have a portfolio that's varied. also it's rife with ai shit and stolen art, so yeah would only recommend that as an initial starting point/using it to make your own personal board for your saved images.

stock photo sites are my go to for refs. getty images, istock, alamy, etc. a simple right click save image or screenshot will work to get the images you want for free. of course there will be the watermarks, but they're honestly a very small issue to bypass. as long as they're not opaque and nearly covering the entire subject; you're good. a nice thing about stock photo sites is they usually give you the option to filter the image search results. say for instance you want to draw an elderly asian woman cooking or a young black man painting a picture or an indigenous child playing with dolls. you can look up certain terms you want in the search bar & specify gender, age and ethnicity to narrow down your search to what you want.

another awesome place for references i discovered during college is posespace.com

like with getty images, it gives you the option to filter your searches. they also have their models in clothed or nude shoots in the event that you want to practice some bare bones anatomy.

also also, get your info from artists of color. there's a decent amount of tutorials ive found over the years on here and youtube on coloring skintones, drawing certain hair types, how to avoid caricatures and stereotyping, different facial features, cultural hairstyles. the list goes on. don't be afraid to depict people outside of your race. literally just go about drawing us the same way you would a white person. don't be scared, as long as you remain respectful and make an honest effort to learn; you'll do fine.

resource links by and from artists of color:

'how i draw south + southeast asian people'

an example of what to avoid when stylizing east asian characters

'drawing asian people, source: i'm asian'

'lessons from drawing I: what is asian anyways?'

'how to draw indians'

'how to draw arabs'

'How I draw skin Part 2: DON”T DRAW NATIVE PEOPLE WITH RED SKIN!!!! A tutorial' (the link to the first part of this tutorial is broken sorry)

How to Draw Native People: a Tutorial/Reference Guide

How to Draw Black People by peachdeluxe

tips for drawing black people by rosheruu

drawing east asian faces by chuwenjie

how to draw black people series by Artistik Freedom (youtube)

✏️How I draw black hairstyles (simple) 🌱 by Likelihood Art (youtube)

there's also a bunch of black and brown artists on twitter and tiktok, so checking those sites for tutorials would be a good additional resource

good luck on your illustrating melanin endeavors 👍🏾

#anonymous ask hour #sorry for the late reply it took a while to compile all these links #art resources #long post

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slaygentford · 7 months

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every matthew mcconaughey romcom, rated

ive never really had a pet white man. ive had many pet white men characters, yes, but never a little pet white man actor who I wish to give treats and pats to like a purse dog. I never before really understood the phenomenon until my 5th or so rewatch of true detective in the year 2024, at which point something demonic was unlocked in my brain. why? how? a mystery for my therapist, when I had a therapist, but I don't anymore, so now it's a mystery for you. overcome with the insatiable urge to tape his picture to the front of my binder and write "hott" underneath it in sharpie I mentally detransitioned and, embracing my latent teenage girl (the girl I was, perhaps, in another world, one parallel to ours; a darker world, but of equal worth to our own sphere, damned as it may be) --began to watch every Matthew mcconaughey romcom ever made.

listed in my watch order, which was random.

how to lose a guy in 10 days: this is a near perfect 00s romcom, too much secondhand embarrassment to be a real mainstay for me, but it nonetheless hits every beat with aplomb. particularly tickled to see them playing bullshit the card game which was a family and friend group fave for me growing up. he and Kate Hudson have probably fucked, which added a lot to the chemistry. in one scene Kate Hudson described how cute he was rubbing his face into her tits and her friend says, do you want to date him or adopt him? at which point I saw into the void, which then saw back into me. instantly it became apparent to me that he will act circles around whoever he's paired with to the point that it actually becomes kind of comical how good of a performance he's giving in a movie that includes not one but two scenes of a dog pissing on a pool table. that being said bebe neuwirth CARRIED this film on her BEAUTIFUL lithe back. 1 instance of no shirt, unfortunately brief. 7/10. vape I hit at midpoint also a 7/10, coincidentally

NB: after watching this movie I had a dream that I was at the beach with him and Kate hudson and I hated her because she had stolen may man.

the wedding planner: when I watched this I got extremely caught up in two things 1 the fact that he went on a date with another woman while engaged and almost kissed her and 2 jlo playing an italian girl. this led me to think about what race is/was in 90s-00s, colorism, borders of the latinx body and codemeshing. something interesting about the wedding planner is that the leads are in every way the opposite of the character they are playing, with little effort to no effort to make up for that diff (Matthew not at all acting like a wholesome pediatrician and rarely seen with children/jlo not at all acting (like) or being an italian). as a result the fourth wall in this movie is made out of wobbling cellophane, an upsetting and uncanny experience. Matthew doing a tango meant a lot to me as a fan of rust's deranged impromptu norteñas tutorial in true detective. as he is a texan, I think he is essentially one of my people. 0 instances of no shirt. 2/10

failure to launch: at the first incident of animal slapstick (chipmunk related) I had the thought while the scene wore on and on, I feel like I'm on drugs. that's because I was on drugs, which I then remembered, but a joint doesnt deny the truth, only reveal it. there are many sports, and Matthew doing sports. I wouldn't be surprised if the original conception of this movie was more like lars and the real girl or silver linings playbook which then had to get repackaged as a rom com bc some parts of this kind of push at the seams of the haha funny tone which makes for a shockingly bad film but a very interesting way to think about process and what this writer's passion project would be. by the final animal slapstick incident (dolphin, second appearance) I really said what the fuck out loud, like actually out loud in my home. we started off strong with some shirtlessness and a calf shot during the sex scene, but the chipmunk to dolphin to bird to iguana to dolphin pipeline really took the wind out of my sails. 1/10

ghosts of girlfriends past: This is doubtless Matthew's worst performance--and yet what a triumph it is, purely because for any other actor, it would be the peak of a career. Matthew has an incredible naturalism. About 15 minutes into this movie, Matthew gets belligerently drunk at his brother's rehearsal dinner. Through half-lidded, glassy eyes, he delivers with thoughtless verve the exact sort of diatribe a man not only uncaring but also unaware of his cruelty can; and yet, in that passivity, he unearths pathos. I consider it an underpainting--a little window which peeks out of a bad script to a fully conceived person. Throughout its runtime, the film degenerates into a pantomime, even parody, of itself: but with just a series of slow blinks, Matthew conveys a complete psyche, an entire lifetime. I truly believe that he comes to roles even those he dislikes with an inescapable talent and sensitivity. If I could bring half of his effort and spark and originality to my own creative pursuits, that would make for a very good career indeed. His integrity as an artist really is why watching his worst films is so fun: in a game of limbo, Matthew can do the lowest backbend of all. Strong calves indeed. anyway, this movie is REALLY bad. 0/10

fool's gold:

10/10

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delusinalandpassionate · 5 months

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So hello...I kinda disappeared for a moment after Don's Canto was announced. After seeing that, I immediately remembered my list, and I wanted to remake it to be ready for her Canto. However, when I started to do it, and then I read shit tone of theories about her, and everything became confusing, and I am kinda procrastinated everything. But I'm back! And well, that's the mini list. It's all shady things that happened with Don in our main story and events. To save some time and energy, I only mentioned things that are definitely shady, and I'm certain 99% will play a role in her Canto, but it's still pretty chaotic.

I am also going to make analysises of all her IDs and EGOs in two separate parts and what I think they will lead to.

I didn't write a lot about any theories because there are A LOT of them, but I would love to hear your personal favorites and promise to give my best opinion about them

Also to the person who wrote to me about Discord, I tried to find you, but it well there wasn't enough information for me to understand how, so if you are still interested in talking about Don, please just write me in Messeges.

Okay back to the List

1. REDACTED

That thing appears in her character description, in a list of particulars , and none of the other characters has anything like this. Also, her list mentions Delusional of Grandiore. However, she does not show any symptoms (yet)

2. Ferris wheel and Carnival

We already saw a Ferris wheel in form of windmill on her character art and carousel in the window of her persinal EGO art and now with a cover for her Canto, we can with certainty say that she has something to do with this theme. The closest thing to Carnival we saw in the City idb Oswald's 8 o'clock Circus. Which is extremely fucked up place and if Don is really was part if it I would be surprised that she looks so normal(both physically and mentally)

Oswald's ideology also has a lot of about wishes and performance, which could suit her character arc quite well, but with him being dead, I am not sure who is left to control Circus.

3. Eyes and dance

Two little hints from second Canto from which my obsession with Don began. We still have no idea what that could possibly mean.

I should mention that there was a theory that her eyes are cognito filters, but I doubt that.

(There were also theories that she's blood fiend, which is interesting.)

4. Deal

In Canto III Episode 10 we get a first mention of mysterious deal that Don Quixote made with Vergilius. It's important to mention that while he beat shit out of her she still argued about her point, but only he mentioned that "deal" she immediately backed up.

Second mention of a deal happens in Canto IV Episode 28 where sinners wonder outloud about their wishes that brought them to the Limbus and Don only gets "...". Which is fucking weird, because there were other sinners who didn't say anything, but only Don was singled out.

Also it seems like a person with whom she made a deal was Vergilius, which I'd already unusual because it's Faust who does this kind of job.

5. Old friends, rampages and distortions

Canto III Episode 19 where Don Quixote beats Sinclair to bring him to his senses and than says "Pardon my rash action. Often I would find myself overcome by fervor, rampaging much the same as a riderless horse. At such moments, mine old friends helped me to come to myself—by beating me senseless. ‘Twas, at times, the only remedy to the fever that had overtaken me."

And well, that's only time she speaks about her past, giving us this little story. And it sounds horrible. However, we can not deny that this type of therapy works in Project moon world really well. I mean, we just finished Canto, where we beat Heatcliff to bring him to his senses.

Actually, if you think about that, most of "rampages" in these games( excluding "panic" from Lopotomy) happen while characters experience Distorting or EGO corruption and surprisingly Don Quixote have some sort of experience with Distortions?

In Canto IV Episode: 53, when we see DongRang Don Quixote is the first to understand that he's experiencing Distortion. And then, in Risk Levels & Classifications, she mentions that Moses(the DISTORTION detective) sounds familiar to her.

Which makes us wonder if she or someone in her past experienced Distortions?

6. Miguel

Don Quixote's quote "Sueno Imposible" is a direct reference to the musical Man Of La Mancha, and Miguel is a main character of this musical author of the story of Don Quixote who trying to live up to his heroic life.

Also, at old sprites, she had MIGUEL written on the bottom of her coat, but it was removed from the model now. HOWEVER, on her official stand, there is still written MIGUEL.

And that kind of makes us wonder if her character arc could be more inspired by musical than book, or if her real name would Miguel. We still not sure, but it definitely should play a role in her Canto.

#limbus company #project moon #don quixote #the list

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multimilliepop · 2 days

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Papyri collage AU ramble list:

(I so sorry to my followers, Iv become mentally ill for the papyrui as of late)

Undertale papyrus: Kinesiology major 🦴(He did it because he was told people who like working out go to that major, but enjoying the actual learning portion as well)

Underswap papyrus: Aerospace engineering major 🚀(Getting C in classes, not because he’s bad at them, but because he’s so good at it he can pick the wrong answers to avoid being forced to join some human space exploration program)

Underfell papyrus: Communications major 📓(He says he’s just in it because he’s being forced to be there and the moment human military lets him in he’s jump on that. He’s a liar and wants to be a teacher or counselor. Lots a emotional baggage behind that decision)

Swapfell papyrus (the purple one): Business major 💵(He gets C’s in his classes, he doesn’t want to be there. All he wants to do is get zooted out of his skull but he’s the only papyrus not receiving financial aid from his brother so he works on top of his classes. Bro is not thriving. But he makes great latte art!)

Fellswap papyrus (Red): Ecology major 🪴(Having a great time with classes but cannot communicate for the life of him. His taller statue and generally angsty outfit style allows him to seem cool without trying though. Is basically the opposite of a flirt, will just talk to you about why the concept of alphas and omega in wolves was a lie and is very passionate about it. Swap and Swapfell stopped inviting him to parties. Has a sister, not a brother)

Fellswap papyrus (gold): Undeclared ✏️(He’s the youngest and also the least inspired to do anything besides play video games that his brother just throws money at him for. Mute for the most part involuntarily but enjoys the company of others, think parallel play. The mental health service department know. While they are concerned for him, they also see him improving everyday and it’s a great thing for everyone.)

Horrortale papyrus: Dropped out 🍎(Works within a small local farming community and has great relationships with a lot of different people in the area. He can *physically* be the loudest, but around people and monsters he’s very soft spoken. Got braces, makes enough money to afford renting a house, tries to do some self help therapy, overall wouldn’t trade his current life for anything. Will not speak with his brother, hasn’t spoken with him in months)

#undertale #underswap #Underfell #Fellswap #swapfell #swapfell gold #swapfell red #horrotale #papyrus #underswap papyrus #underfell papyrus #fellswap papyrus #swapfell papyrus #horrortale papyrus #undertale au #i’m so sorry #this is so cringe #collage au #don’t look at me

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xamaxenta · 4 months

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Alright I’m bored and tired

So let’s list off some horny concepts to get the neurons firing shall we?

1. Dragodile lesbians (idk just really big tits)

2. Marsabo one or both wearing cock rings

3. MAS trans sabo with her massive horse cock and her two buxom gfs

4. Marace abo alpha Marco that acts like a omega and omega ace who keeps getting leaky tits

5. Dragodile dragon getting his prostate tortured crying and drooling

6. Sexy secretary getting knocked up by his boss (possible crime boss)

Number 6 pllleeaasee i need it to be acebo/saboace

That being said !!!!! More under cut bc i replied super long…

1. God!!!??? You do understand … theyre both equally stacked… breasts for DAYS. Breasts for WEEKS they’re both in corsets and skin tight skinny bell bottom jeans and knee high heeled bootie/combat boot combos thyre serving MILF but also the kind thats taken and youre never gonna get a chance even tho they’re complicated rn 💔

2. They… would make it a goddamn game, Sabo snapping pics of his lik chastity cage and then the raunchiest selfie ever like hey baby got myself all pent up n waiting for u to come home, Marco gets home rock solid eager to play like so whats the catch? Sabo laughing like ive got a lil game for you, if you decipher this puzzle you get to find where ive hidden the key to the cage, fail in the hour timelimit and you dont get to cum or get fucked, marco who desperately wants to get fucked by sabo getting all fired up like !!! He will unlock the at cage and get sabos dick its like saw if it was sexy lmao

3. OH. Lesbian MAS!!! But Marco and Ace being cisfem/afab and amab trans fem Sabo !!!! ? Shes so fucking pretty you know it … 😭 i know you meant theyre all ladies but now im stuck obsessed over transfem Sabo it just feels right or theyre genderfluid, and in any au ofc sabos got the biggest dick to dick down his/her partners :3 you know she got both her ladies gagging for it esp Ace my beloved cockwhore

4. Ohhh Ace nesting SUPER DUPER HARD WITH MARCO BC HES SO… MILFY… older mature Omega vibes even tho hes actually genetically an Alpha, actually fuck it!! Biological gender chimaera Marco who after eating his DF has both omega instinct frm it but biology of an alpha, Ace lactating CONSTANTLY from the overstimulation of being mated to him bc omega?!? Comforts!? But also his big soft alpha mate? Hes so wet and constantly dripping both his tits and his cunt 😩💦 hes just a happy lil thing mwah i love this one anon !!!

5. Its rly fun to imagine Dragon looking for a dom and getting all the paperwork sorted and getting introduced to his dom and its also like sugar daddy vibes bc Crocodile is so disgustingly wealthy dudes got a WHOLE ASS DUNGEON and hes just a dragon, let him get trussed up like a festive turkey and have Crocodile stream him squirming and struggling directly into his office, addresses Dragon by vocal cue alone via mic its all consensual and kinks they both enjoy and its all so he can see a powerful figure like Monkey Dragon get unwelded at the SEAMS!!!

6. Annnnd yeah i want this so bad for saboace acebo idc whos the mob boss wife here either is sublime bc Sabo being this absolute insane crime syndicate owner, diabolical and untouchable with his gorgeous trophy wifehusband Ace who has the great potential to be some famous public figure like an actor or smth, and hes like the publics darling so their dynamic is so spicy like my husband is a murderous black market dealing weapons distributing demon and i love him!!! ❤️❤️❤️

Alternatively mob boss Ace is hot in general like built his own family and theyre close knit super loyal band of misfits and outcasts whatever, probably owns a huge chain of casinos and hes always in the house, hes just such a threatening presence too but hes not the real danger but his svelte ultra smoking hot ex assassin wife Sabo, like sabo was sent to take Ace out but failed bc Ace seduced him and they got married, try harm a hair on Aces head and Sabo will bear down upon you with the wrath of all seven hells, hes a menace in stilettos and hes got knives all tangled up in his pantyhose !

#MAS #acebo #saboace #absolutely BASED list anon i love u

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thegayhimbo · 5 months

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Ranking The Stranger Things Tie-Ins:

Now that I've finished the reviews (for the time being), I wanted to do a ranking of all the tie-in comics, graphic novels, and books. Originally, I was just going to do a Top 5 Best and Worst List, but I figured it would be more fun to make a complete list of all the tie-ins while also giving my brief thoughts on each one (especially for those who don't want to read my lengthy reviews). Please note this is all in good fun and just my personal opinion, which can be subjected to change.

Also, this list will NOT include any of the show's episodes, video games, tabletop games, children's tie-in books, the Choose Your Own Adventure book, the Stranger Things Experience, or the stage play The First Shadow.

With that out of the way, let's begin in order from Worst to Best:

#26: Stranger Things Summer Special (See Review Here)

I never cared for Powell and Callahan as characters. They barely have anything to do with the show's main arc, they're NOT funny, and the "bumbling cop" trope is something I've grown tired of in recent years.

The premise of this short, where both of them are conveniently present at key events during season 3 in their lousy pursuit of being "good cops," all the while having constant near-misses with the Upside Down, the Flayed, and the Meat Flayer, is a repetitive joke that quickly grows old. That's not even getting into the huge continuity errors plaguing the short and creating a bunch of plot-holes. Completely unnecessary. Hard pass.

#25: Stranger Things The Bully (See Review Here)

This only ranks slightly higher than Summer Special because I like the artwork better, and it doesn't mess up the show's continuity like the previous comic did. However, that's all this really has going for it.

For whatever reason, they decided to make an entire graphic novel focusing on Troy and James (the bullies from season 1), and all I could think about while reading it is "This is a huge waste of time." I already didn't like Troy to begin with, this comic does NOTHING to improve my opinion of him, and considering that neither James nor Troy have appeared on the show since (and probably aren't coming back for season 5), I don't see what the point of this story was. This paragraph from my review sums it up best:

#24: Stranger Things x TMNT Crossover (See Review Here)

I'm sure there are fans who enjoyed this bizarre trip while embracing its absurdness and surrealism, but I am not one of them. I like TMNT and I like Stranger Things, but I draw the line at saying both properties exist in the same universe. That's not even getting into the haphazard attempts by the writers to make this comic canon with the show. Knowing the Duffer Brothers, that's likely not going to happen.

#23: Stranger Things Tales From Hawkins (See Review Here)

The idea of doing an anthology comic focusing on Hawkins residents was intriguing, but the end result was disappointing. They should have broadened their horizons regarding which characters to focus on, and not just set the stories exclusively in the first 2 seasons.

Murray's story (Issue #2) and the Pumpkin Patch Rivalry (Issue #4) are arguably the best ones. The rest are either forgettable or derivative.

#22: Stranger Things Six (See Review Here)

My first venture into Stranger Things comics. I've come a long way since then! :)

I remember looking forward to this particular comic to learn more about Hawkins Lab, Dr. Brenner, Project MKUltra, and the special kids............only to feel underwhelmed when I actually read it. I wanted to like Francine/Six, but I didn't find her interesting or compelling as a character, and the attempts to include other aspects of the show's lore (i.e. The Upside Down, Terry Ives, El and Kali, etc) felt shoehorned. Combined with the direction season 4 went, and it's a safe bet to say this comic is NOT canon (if it ever was).

#21: Stranger Things Suspicious Minds (See Review Here)

Suspicious Minds ranks slightly higher that Six for doing a better job fleshing out the experiments that were taking place at Hawkins Lab, as well as giving more details about Kali, Terry Ives, the test subjects, and El's biological father Andrew. It helps that Brenner is a threatening presence in this book, and that the narrative excels in maintaining suspense.

However, similar to Six, the events of season 4 render most of this book non-canon. That's not even getting into a major continuity error regarding El's date of birth that sticks out like a sore thumb.

Suspicious Minds serves as a cautionary reminder that if you're a creator and you've planned out a major twist for your show, then you either need to have a direct hands-on approach to how tie-ins are written and approved, or you need to be willing to share that twist with those you've hired to write tie-ins for the universe you're managing.

In any case, it is PAINFULLY CLEAR the Duffer Brothers didn't share information about Henry/One/Vecna with Gwenda Bond when she worte this book (or Paul Dichter for that matter when he helped oversee its development), and boy does it show in the final product. 😖

#20: Stranger Things Kamchatka (See Review Here)

Another example of a comic where the premise sounds intriguing, but they squander it on characters who aren't going to play a role on the show while also giving very little (and in some cases, contradictory) information about the show's lore.

While I liked the darker tone, the Cold War setting, and the spy thriller aspects, the characters didn't do much to impress me, and I was also frustrated by the lack of canon characters (Hopper, Dmitiri, Yuri, etc) who could have been in this comic and weren't. It's not bad, but it is mediocre when it didn't need to be.

#19: Stranger Things Into The Fire (See Review Here)

A sequel that improves on its predecessor (Stranger Things Six). While the comic likely isn't canon for the same reasons Six isn't, I appreciated the personal stakes this time around, I loved the creepy gothic aesthetic they did with Jamie/Nine's hallucinations, and it was nice to see Kali utilized in this story in a meaningful way. Here's hoping the Duffer Brothers wise up and bring Kali back for season 5 because she deserves so much better!

#18: Stranger Things Creature Feature (See Review Here)

One aspect of Season 4 that was disappointing was how little we got to see of the family dynamic with El and the Byers once they moved. It's hinted at, but not explored deeply. Creature Feature dives a little more into that, as well as El's struggles with PTSD, and gives a nice heartwarming scene between El, Jonathan, and Will towards the end that makes the short stand out.

However, the one-shot comic is sadly brief, and it may leave people frustrated about why they didn't go for a longer comic/graphic novel about El and the Byers adjusting to life in Lenora. I would've been interested in seeing that!

#17: Stranger Things The Game Master (See Review Here)

A one-shot comic where we get to see Steve and Nancy back together after the events of season 1 while also getting a surprisingly sweet interaction between Steve and Mike that isn't them griping with one another. I don't care much for Steve and Nancy's relationship, but I did like their attempts to help Mike feel better after El's apparent death. That was enough to elevate this short.

#16: Stranger Things Erica's Quest (See Review Here)

Not a fan of the artwork, but I was happy to witness the Scoop's Troop back together again. I also love how this short confirms Steve has played D&D before, which gives context to that scene in S4 when Dustin calls Steve asking him to be a substitute player in Eddie's D&D campaign.

#15: Stranger Things The Voyage (See Review Here)

Major improvement on Stranger Things Kamchatka. It's highly doubtful the show will include any mention of this comic (though if the Duffer Brothers decide to bring back the Russian arc for S5, I hope they incorporate Dr. Karine as the main antagonist), but the story is scary, suspenseful, and has the kind of gruesomeness you'd expect from an R-Rated horror film.

#14: Stranger Things Darkness On The Edge Of Town (See Reviews Here)

Having grown up reading a lot of murder mysteries, I have a soft spot for the genre. Hearing that Hopper's backstory involved him tracking down a deranged serial killer in New York City back in the 70s while also dealing with a dangerous cult was enough to get me on board with this book.

This novel isn't perfect, but it makes up for its shortcomings in creative ways. Hopper's backstory with the NYPD is fascinating, the story's focus on issues related to poverty, crime, mental health, law enforcement, and societal woes works well (even if they drop the ball towards the end), Hopper's interactions with El in the present are a highlight, and the narrative is effective in keeping the reader invested.

#13: Stranger Things Erica The Great (See Review Here)

A light-hearted graphic novel that bridges Erica's arc between seasons 3 and 4 while expanding on her growth as a character and development as a D&D play. It was cool seeing Erica's friends get their day in the limelight (one of whom might be making an appearance in S5), and the story has enough funny moments to keep the reader entertained.

#12: Stranger Things Flight Of Icarus (See Review Here)

I know fan reaction towards this book was cold when it was first announced, and I'll admit parts of it were hard to read given we all know how Eddie's story ends. I'm not a fan of media that teases false hope to the audience, only to cruelly yank it away.

That being said, I will go to bat for this book: It's well-written, and does a good job expanding on Eddie's character and his relationships with others (Wayne, Al Munson, Jason, etc). I also appreciate the book's themes regarding "forced conformity," and its scathing criticisms towards individuals and institutions (school teachers, law enforcement, students, residents, etc) who scapegoat and punish people like Eddie for existing while allowing (or in some cases, enabling) truly vile people to get away with being vicious and cruel towards "acceptable targets."

Considering how certain individuals on Tumblr and varying social media platforms have been treating others for the past few months, this book couldn't have come during a more relevant time.

#11: Stranger Things Halloween Special (See Review Here)

A delightful Halloween comic taking place before season 1 which centers around the Party telling an urban legend about the Child Eater of Hawkins, which coincidentally has eerie parallels to Vecna. Creepy artwork, an unsettling atmosphere, and a fun twist at the end! :)

#10: Stranger Things Hawkins Horrors (See Review Here)

Same deal as the Halloween Special, except it takes place between Seasons 3 and 4, and features multiple horror stories told by Steve, Robin, Nancy, Max, Lucas, Erica, Dustin, and Mike while they're all trapped in the Video Store during a power outage. The stories are scary and reminiscent of horror anthologies like Tales from the Crypt and Goosebumps, and some of them even cheekily foreshadow certain events that occur in season 4.

#9: Stranger Things Runaway Max (See Reviews Here)

Like Flight of Icarus, this book is hard to read, albeit for a different reason: I don't enjoy stories with characters trapped in abusive situations, and this book does not pull its punches in depicting the utter hell Max suffered through living with both Neil and Billy.

That being said, I grew to have a new appreciation for Max's character because of this book, and I liked seeing her backstory, her perspective on the events of season 2, and her thoughts about the characters she interacts with. I loved seeing her relationship with Lucas develop, I liked her brief interactions with Steve, and there was a satisfying payoff in her standing up to Billy and finally regaining some control over her life. If you love Max's character, this book is for you!

#8: Stranger Things Winter Special (See Review Here)

The closest Stranger Things will ever have for a Christmas Special (not counting the endings of the first two season finales). So many little details (i.e. the way the Party explains different Christmas stories to El and how she visualizes them, the revelation about what happened to the demodog in Joyce's fridge, etc) that make this an enjoyable read.

#7: Stranger Things Lucas On The Line (See Review Here)

One thing I will say for the tie-ins is that I appreciate how they expand the perspectives of characters from the show. Such is the case with Lucas on the Line. It takes place between seasons 3 and 4, and explores Lucas's attempts to come to terms with his trauma, the growing rift between himself and Max, his attempts to balance his strained relationships with his friends and his desire to play basketball and break out of the "nerd" stereotype, and it gives a very brutal but effective portrait of what it's like for Lucas to be one of the few black kids in Hawkins constantly surrounded by people who are either outwardly racist or project their biases and prejudices in truly insidious ways.

There are two reasons I'm not ranking this novel as highly even though it's a fan-favorite: 1.) There are continuity errors that took me out of certain moments while reading it, and 2.) The third act (which is when S4 begins) does a clumsy job tying in with the rest of the book and its themes. I really wish the book had continued with Lucas's story up to the end of S4 instead of stopping halfway through.

#6: Stranger Things The Other Side (See Review Here)

I always wanted to know what was going on with Will in season 1 when he was taken to the Upside Down. This comic thankfully elaborates on that and doesn't disappoint. Will's journey to survive is both intense and terrifying, and the way the comic seamlessly connects itself with the events of season 1 is to be applauded.

I have no clue what the Duffer Brothers plan to reveal in season 5 about the Upside Down and why time froze in 1983 when Will was taken, but considering they talked with the writers and artists for this comic and gave their stamp of approval, I'm hopeful the events of The Other Side won't be retconned.

#5: Stranger Things Science Camp (See Review Here)

Who knew that when Dustin went to Science Camp, he walked right into a Friday the 13th movie? 😂

Don't want to spoil too much about this one, but I had a blast reading it. Dustin's perspective is always entertaining, the comic works as a brilliant introduction for Suzie, and the mystery plaguing the camp is genuinely interesting and has a good twist. High recommendation.

#4: Stranger Things Zombie Boys (See Review Here)

I'm still bitter that the character of Joey Kim never made an appearance on the show despite the camaraderie he had with the Party, as well as how he gave the boys some catharsis from all the shit they were put through in season 1.

Nevertheless, I enjoyed the premise of the Party making a zombie movie, and I appreciated how it handled the characters' trauma without being patronizing. The artwork was also impressive and beautiful to look at. Here's hoping we get more comics and graphic novels like this in the future!

#3: Stranger Things Tomb Of Ybwen (See Review Here)

At its core, the comic manages to explore an aspect that wasn't given much coverage on the show: Will's reaction to Bob's death and his attempts to come to terms with it. All of which culminates in a quest Will undertakes when he finds a map from Bob that (allegedly) leads to an ancient Viking treasure buried in Hawkins.

I don't want to give too much away in terms of spoilers, but the story is both emotional, sad, and heartwarming, and it does an excellent job reinforcing the friendship between all 4 boys while also demonstrating the impact Bob had on Will's life.

#2: Stranger Things and Dungeons and Dragons (See Review Here)

Speaking as someone who's occasionally crafted various fantasy scenarios in my head to cope with the stresses of life, this comic was deeply relatable. The show never shied away from emphasizing the importance of D&D to these characters, and this comic expands on that by illustrating why they became interested in D&D in the first place, how they've used D&D to cope with living in Hawkins, how the events of the first 3 seasons factor into how they play D&D, and how the game evolved with them as they continued to get older. It's like the piece of media from your childhood that stays with you as an adult. Arguably the best comic in the series (so far).

#1: Stranger Things Rebel Robin (See Reviews Here)

My favorite book and tie-in of the series. Speaking as someone who's gay, this story spoke to me on a personal level, and there were a lot of parallels I was drawing between Robin's experiences in high school and my own: The fear of being outed and ostracized. The desire to break free and explore the world. Recognizing the injustices that exist in society and wishing you could do something about them. Getting a nasty dose of reality that people you thought you could trust aren't reliable, and may even be more awful than you anticipated. Been there, done that, still dealing with some aspects of it.

It's funny because even if you take out the plot elements relating to the Upside Down, you still get a great coming-of-age story, and one that speaks to many people, LGBT+ or otherwise.

That concludes the ranking and reviews for right now! Thank you again for those who've been reading them! :)

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devilkittydeckbuilding · 7 months

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hewwo my friends!! i wanted to tell you all about my new 60 card deck i built recently!!

that's right

i said 60 card >;3

im not only a commander player teehee

its also fully modern legal!!

ive actually been grinding a whole lot of 60 card games against my girlfriend/toy/pet/wife @goqmir with a bunch of decks lately and its been a blast :3

so today i want to talk about my deck which i haven't thought of a clever name for yet which is:

EXPEDITED INHERITANCE COMBO

this is a list that i changed up to suit my personal wants and needs and while i couldnt find the original decklist i stole the idea from an mtggoldfish short on youtube and according to seth the first person to build this was a user who goes by SMOMP1 but thats all i know

anyway!! i believe the original decklist was a purely mono red deck but i thought. hey. this is a combo deck, why don't i add tutors? so i went rakdos and am playing 4 tutors and its made the deck feel very consistent :3c

so here's the basic layout of the gameplan: the main combo is playing marauding raptor to cheapen the cost on all our 0 and 1 mana creatures so that they are free, and then playing expedited inheritance which means when you play a 1 drop creature for free marauding raptor deals 2 damage to that creature on etb, which then triggers expedited inheritance to exile 2 cards from the top of your library. the idea of this is to keep hitting more cheap creatures off these exiled cards so that you can play more and more creatures and exile through your whole deck.

the deck is actually rather simple and is a two card combo (if you arent counting all the small creatures that is lol but theres a million of them) and yeah thats the main idea.

now you may be asking,

how do you win??

well theres a really cool answer to that question

the main way to win the game, or really the only feasible way, is to dome your opponent for 50 with aetherflux reservoir

the way to win with aetherflux is to go through your whole deck with the combo loop described above. by doing this you cast so many spells that when you get down the reservoir it only takes a few spells cast and you win the game!!

it may sound like this deck is really slow to win because you have to get down the resevoir and 2 other combo pieces to win but we actually have a plan to get this thing down the turn you combo, which can be as soon as turn 3 >:3c

and its this little guy:

as you go through the whole combo loop you will eventually find and play 4 myr moonvessels which when they all are played and subsequently killed by marauding raptor will net you 4 colorless mana which is just enough to play the reservoir!!

as for the rest of the deck there are some honorable mentions plus the changes i made to the deck

inquisitive puppet is probably the best small creature in the deck that is not combo essential because it scrys on etb which sets you up to either combo more cause it finds you more creatures to play or it can help find combo pieces to set up!! it also can exile itself to make a new creature if you had to play it before the combo which is 2 more free cards!!

theres also stuff like combat courier which can just be sacced to dig deeper for combo pieces and such but most of the other creatures are just cheap with minimal bonus affects. im also playing myr servitor for funsies mostly. the main thought there was that if my combo fizzles i could theoretically combo the next turn since they return themselves to the battlefield on upkeep but thats oddly niche and i think ill swap them out for something else

as for changes i made to the list, i added black for tutors and also better removal.

i added diabolic intent as my only tutor because it isnt too expensive and also is perfect for the deck. since im playing so many dirt cheap and somewhat useless creatures why not play a card thats essentially demonic tutor with the small price of sacrificing a creature!! this card has played really well in my matches and essentially gives me 4 extra copies of my combo pieces!!

im also playing a weird creature choice in hope of ghirapur because i thought it would be interesting to try out.

the idea behind the hope is that it serves as a cheap creature for the combo but also presents a form of protection if i get it down before the combo. if i can get in a hit with it before the combo and sac it then it prevents the opponent from casting noncreature spells for that turn which is theoretically enough to sneak the combo in through removal. its not a perfect plan but it had gotten me a couple wins.

as for the sideboard im kind of new to the concept of sideboarding and i built it to be effective against general decks but also im only playing against my wife rn so it isnt perfect.

anyway yeah thats the deck!! it will continually change as i add new cards cause im still testing it but i hope this was either insightful or entertaining and i suggest giving the deck a try and maybe putting your own spin on it!!

thanks for reading!!

#mtg #magic the gathering

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ochrearia · 10 days

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Biff and YS sillies.

Shakes these two violently. If anyone gets to be the big brother and little brother dynamic first it's these two and that's me being entirely biased towards my own BF but like IVE ALREADY BEEN WRITING THESE ASSHOLES INTERACTING FOR MONTHS IN POPR SO IT MAKES SENSE

I also almost gatekept this? But then I remember most of you guys here only found me off of Poly Propaganda so like. Why would I gatekeep a BF you guys are familiar with reading about

BFs in this drabble: PoPr!BF (Biff, mine) Yourself (YS)

Perhaps he was just losing his edge. Or maybe the world was starting to be kind enough to let him feel like a person again. Either way there was something so incredibly tempting about pushing buttons when Yourself knew he could get away with it. He was good at getting away with a lot of things. “The incentive is in your reactions, Biff. You want me to stop being obnoxious right back at you? Stop reacting then.”

“See this is on you, really, because I may not be smart but I can recognize the potential to be the worst little shit imaginable with the information you just gave me.” Biff grinned, flopping over YS’s chest intentionally. “And since we’re the same person it’s very likely that any of the ways my buttons can be pushed are the same ways yours can. As you have already proved by pushing a bunch of mine with no prior knowledge.”

“Ooh, big words from the little man.” YS continued to tease instead. He didn’t want to admit at any point that Biff was possibly his favorite, because that wasn’t fair to the others. They’d just known each other the longest, and while they all had the same potential for it, Biff was really the definition his mind jumped to when he thought of the two words ‘little brother’. He wasn’t saying that out loud for shit.

“Patronizing me is going to be your worst mistake.” Biff threatened, grinning wildly. “I think you need to be knocked down a few pegs, you massive asshole. If my buttons are similar to yours then this isn’t going to keep going well for you. No one knows what pisses me off more than me! Meaning I know how to piss you off too.” The smaller fished his phone from his pocket, pushing his elbows against the silly counterpart’s chest to prop himself up. YS watched with a raised eyebrow as he typed something.

“Oh that better fucking not be the watermelon song.”

“What’s wrong with the watermelon song?” Biff asked innocently as the aforementioned song started blasting from his phone at full volume. “Gee, I don’t know about you, but you know what pisses me off? A strong earworm that I know won’t shut up for at least a few days.”

YS had half a mind to shove this dickhead off of him. That was, at first, something he’d thought was a difference between them- how affectionate Biff was, and how he was keen to show that affection by being touchy. Though in reality it hadn’t been a difference at all, something which having met all these other selves has proven. Apparently he gave really good hugs. Something less known was that he stole away just as much comfort from them as he was intending to give. Contact was nice when your body was always cold for as long as you could remember. Pushing him off would just mean more cold, again.

He settled for roughly ruffling his little brot- Biff’s- hair instead. “You’re- okay what’s a good word that would actually make you mad… I’ve exhausted the punch power of things like ‘dumbass’ and ‘shitter’ by using them too often. They’ve lost their meanings.”

“I have literally done nothing wrong and you’re mean to me for no reason.”

“I’m adding ‘a big fat liar’ to the list by the way.” YS snarked back immediately. “Turn this shit off, I’ve already heard this damn thing several times too many for my lifetime.”

“Mean to me.” Biff repeated, not turning it off and just lowering the volume instead. “Can’t believe you’re such a fucking Battleblock Theater hater.”

“I have literally never played that game and I never want to because of you and this song. Turn it off or I’m shoving you away and you will leave back through the mirror without a hug today.”

“Fuck!” Biff swore, mad that his attempt to push YS’s buttons was instead ending in more of his being pushed. “You’re such an asshole! Big, stupid, dumb fuckin’! Jerk!”

YS burst into laughter, rough with disuse. Low snickering that was prone to snorts as he tried to breathe between them. He wasn’t one to laugh very much, and even when he did it was only for a few seconds at a time. It was incredibly rare for him to go on an actual giggle fit, not even believing he still could after everything. Then again, he’d also believed he would never get to feel warm again either. Or that he’d never get to see the colors of life in anything other than sad, depressed, washed-out hues. Things change. There’d been so much bad change to face in his life. He’d forgotten what good change was like.

It was like the sun. Bright and warm. Life giving.

“I don’t think I’ve gotten to hear you laugh for that long before.” Biff said, turning the playful atmosphere in a more serious direction. “That’s not to make you self-conscious by the way, don’t you dare start thinking that shit. Sorry, I tend to blurt things out before thinking, but like, honestly. The others aren’t fully sure how to be affectionate with you on the same level I do, because it’s kind of weird in a way, acting brotherly when that’s literally just yourself, but I know they think the same thing. It’s kind of… I don’t know, crisis inducing? To look at another version of you and know you’re so… sad. Eh, maybe not crisis inducing. Fuck I don’t know words. It makes us sad. That’s probably the most straight-forward way I can say it.”

YS’s laughs faded, shadowed eyes watching the other carefully. There was a very easy and negative takeaway he could get out of those words alone but he knew that wasn’t what Biff was trying to get at. Making assumptions before having the whole picture only led to more problems.

“You’re smart. Surely you caught on to that by now. You’re seeking us out with the intent to help because it’s the next best thing when you’re so clammed up on your own self that you can’t give everything you give to us, to yourself instead. You’re not going to get away with that without us giving back. So of course seeing you so sad makes us sad. But it’s okay! We’re going to help fix that.” He said matter-of-factly. How confident.

YS huffed out one last chuckle. “All of you are so confident about solving problems you’ve never actually faced. Somewhere along the line I suppose it’s endearing but you’re all incredibly dumb and misguided.”

“I’ve faced them.” Biff reminded. “Not physically. But I have… faced them. Seen everything you lock in your head because you think you have to contain it alone. And I know you’re still mad at me for doing that. You just never fucking talk, man. All of us dumbasses come to you all vulnerable and you fix that but you don’t let yourself get vulnerable. What are you afraid of?”

Don’t you know? Though he never really did say it out loud. There were a lot of things he didn’t say out loud. He was scared of hurting them. They knew that. He was scared to lose them too. Something about the double meaning of losing himself made him uncomfortable.

“...Are we okay?” Biff continued suddenly, voice softer and more nervous. “It’s been weeks since I, I guess, betrayed you in a way. Took your magic and used it against you. I knew it wasn’t what you wanted and did it anyway.”

A flash of him, pounding against the glass of a mirror he couldn’t walk in, because Biff had purposefully avoided anything reflective. His face, always so pale and sad, shadowed out and hung low, but rolling tears still visible, kept company by a panicked and upset grimace, teeth clenched so tight they could shatter.

Had it all been a mistake?

“You disappeared on me for a while after. Scared me. I knew I deserved it, you were so angry when you came to take your baggage back. You stopped showing up in my dreams even. I deserved it but it still scared me. I wondered if we’d ever talk again after a few days.”

Biff was right about one thing. He had been angry. Furious, really, though it wasn’t all directed at him. They hadn’t really talked about it either. The days he had been avoiding Biff were the days he decided to reach out to even more selves- he didn’t need to know that though. That would probably just make him feel some sort of venom towards the others. YS didn’t want that. All of them getting along was important too.

“But… are we okay?” Biff repeated, lips stuck in a frown. “I guess I can’t really ask for forgiveness if you really don’t want to do that. But I need to… know where we stand so I don’t overstep. Hell, I’ve probably been overstepping this whole time…”

This dude worried too much.

“You are annoying.” YS started, almost laughing at the look of shock that caused. “You are. But I’m not saying that as a bad thing. You’re annoying that you care so damn much about my opinion of you. We’ve had this conversation before about your GF and Pico. You lost all your confidence in the face of them not thinking highly of you, in a dream. You know what that’s telling me? That you somehow care about my opinion as much as theirs. Don’t you think that’s a bit overdramatic?”

“Not if it’s the opinion of my big brother…” Biff mumbled. He hadn’t meant it to be loud enough for the other to hear, a reply to himself born from a need to say something in rebuttal. The other had definitely heard though.

YS didn’t think the grin on his face could get any wider without his head splitting. “We’re okay, you fucking idiot.” Big brother huh? Guess that whole changing my nickname in the groupchat thing wasn’t just a joke. I’m not entirely sure if that should make me this damn happy. I think I’d be even happier if the rest started calling me that too… “If everything ended after one shit choice then none of us would be here. None of us, because all of us are prone to shit choices with the small amount of brain cells we have collectively. So yes, we're okay. Just don’t fucking do that again.”

“You got it, bossman.” Biff teased, steering the atmosphere back to silly. “Good to know I’ll still be getting my hug before I leave.”

“So long as you don’t push any more of my buttons before then.”

“No promises!”

#rgbfverse #this shit made me slam my desk while writing god I HATE THEM /pos

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