#I already touched on this scene before a couple of times so I thought I'd put all my thoughts in one post

[ffsg0jo]

head cannon/drabble request for a love triangle between katuski bakugo, shoto todoroki and fem or gn reader please & thank yoooou! i love reading your works so much

a/n: thank you so much for your kind words and your request !! got super super inspired by this and thought id throw in a little twist, too :)) let me know your thoughts, and i hope you enjoy <33 this is mostly crack, though so let me know if you want a more serious version :))

i am taking requests and writing fics and matchups for gaza. check the linked post out to find out more !!

katsuki was seething. his teeth were bared, grinding against each other, the veins on his forehead and neck popping out. you could see him try and contain his anger, using the breathing techniques you helped him work on. but he looked like he was about to burst.

and right opposite him was shoto, slight smirk on his face from seeing katsuki's reaction. he was walking on a thin line, and everyone around them watched on knowing that.

you don't understand how the fight first started, but you just wanted it to end. whilst katsuki and shoto weren't exactly the bestest of friends, they had a mutual respect for each other and were on friendly terms. maybe even on the way to becoming good friends.

except now it looked like they were about to murder each other, staring each other down, standing almost nose to nose.

"what's going on," izuku whispered, coming to stand next to you and eyeing the scene warily. knowing both boys and the way shoto was slyly glancing at you, he could somewhat hazard a guess as to why the two were squaring up.

"izu you have to stop them," you whisper shouted back, your hand reaching for his arm. you did not want to get involved, but you still wanted the two to come to an agreement. they were your friends!

"you know why they're fighting, right?"

"no of course not, otherwise i would've tried to do something!"

izuku just looks at you and slightly laughs. he wonders how you've remained oblivious for so long. it's so obvious that both katsuki and shoto have a crush on you.

the former has a light blush painting his cheeks every time you come within a two metre radius of him. and the latter always buys you your favourite soft drink and leaves a little post-it note with his version of a joke stuck to it. and apparently, you just took it as them being friendly.

the green-haired boy puts both his arms around your waist and pulls you into him, kissing you all over your cheeks. he hopes they're both watching, just so they know where they stand.

"they both have a crush on you babe," he says between kisses. you barely register izuku's words still in shock over the way he's being so affectionate in public. sure you've both been dating for a couple of months now, but you agreed to keep it a secret, knowing what your friends were like.

you press yourself into izuku's firm body, relishing in his touch when you suddenly freeze, the words finally processing. you pull away and hold his arms, your mouth wide open in shock. izuku snorts at the look on your face. you were so adorable.

turning to look at katsuki and shoto you found that the two were no longer nose to nose, now staring at you in izuku's arms.

both your friends deflated and shared a self-pitying look with each other, embarrassment somewhat evident on their faces.

"how'd that nerd manage to bag (name)?"

"i'd like to know too. i was so sure they'd like me back."

"HA! fat chance, your ugly two faced ass could never."

"why are you still fighting? they're clearly already taken." shoto deadpans, glancing away from the scene in front of him and turning to face the blonde.

"yeah, you're right." katsuki says before pausing. his stomach all of a sudden rumbles. all that vein popping made him hungry. "wanna grab lunch? 'm starving."

"sure," shoto shrugged. now that he thought about it, he was hungry. "you pick."

it was like someone flicked a switch. from being seconds away from activating their quirks to walking away, discussing what to eat for lunch. you looked at your boyfriend again, eyebrows furrowing, totally confused by the last 10 minutes or so.

you were somewhat disappointed by the whole exchange. they both gave up so easily and didn't even try to fight for your hand. you would never have left izuku, but it was nice knowing you were wanted.

"hey, i can tell what you're thinking," your boyfriend playfully scowls, poking your cheek and demanding your attention. "am i not enough?"

you laugh and lean closer to him, softly pressing a kiss to his lips.

"you're all i've ever wanted and more, izuku."

© ffsg0jo 2024 — do not plagiarise, repost, modify, or translate any of my work, in any way shape or form; i will piss in your cereal if you do. all work belongs to me and me only.

[david-talks-sw]

Doylist outlook on the Anakin & Council scenes during "The Phantom Menace"

About 4 years ago, I'm talking to an older friend of mine who grew up with the Original Trilogy.

He tells me that one of the disappointments of the Prequels, for him, is that the Jedi Knights had been built as these "Knights of the Round Table" and, instead, what his generation got was "monks who'll pick on a 9-year-old for being afraid".

Which makes sense in a story about their corruption and downfall, but he'd have preferred to root for them, see them in their heyday.

And, like, I agreed.

I didn't necessarily feel they were picking on him when I watched the scene as a child, my takeaway from that scene was the "fear leads to anger" part. But when I was thinking back on it as an adult, what my friend said seemed to track, and it was in-line with the "Jedi are corrupt" prism through which a lot of people see the Prequels, 2018-me included.

But nowadays - having read a whole bunch of George Lucas quotes and rewatched the scene - I don't think that it's meant to be perceived that way.

I've briefly touched on this last year, but if we look at this scene from a Doylian perspective, rather than a Watsonian one, it's clear to me that the point of this scene is three-fold.

1) Moving the story along, making sure Anakin is present in the third act.

"This was a little tricky, when writing the script, in that I didn’t want Anakin to become a Jedi yet, cuz I’m saving that for the end of the movie. But at the same time I still had to have him tag along. (laughs) And I was able to use, really, the device of the fact that Anakin had been put in Qui-Gon’s care and that he had promised his mother that he would take care of him as a way of allowing him to take the boy along with him on this trek… to the next third of the movie. But one of the difficulties of writing a script with lots and lots of characters is rationalize why everybody’s along." - The Phantom Menace, Director’s Commentary, 1999

This one's pretty simple to follow.

We need Anakin in the third act so he can blow up the big ship at the end. So the Council doesn't take Anakin in, but let's Qui-Gon keep him as a ward until a more definitive decision can be made.

2) Foreshadowing Anakin's inevitable downfall.

"We have the little testing scene which is really designed to allow him to be accepted as a Jedi, eventually. Because he has the powers… but as Yoda points out, there’s a lot of fear in him, and anger. That’s why they actually deny him the chance to become a Jedi. But it’s also - when they relent later on - it’s the thing that ultimately begins to describe some of his downfall". - The Phantom Menace, Commentary Track #2, 1999

Also straightforward. Anakin will become Vader, so let's hint at this.

The Jedi are clairvoyant wizards, they see all the red flags but must also admit that his future is clouded. In doubt, they'd rather err on the side of caution and not train him.

As George explained in Cut Magazine, in 1999, both the Council's prediction and Qui-Gon's decision are ultimately correct and wrong; Darth Vader does plunge the galaxy in darkness, but he will also bring back balance to the Force.

3) Illustrating the Jedi's principles by injecting his own values into their teachings.

"Ideas don't come into a story that easily. A lot of the time the characters have to say what you mean, and to do that the characters usually have to have differing opinions about the idea so they can discuss it." - (collected in The Star Wars Archives: 1999-2005), 1996

This is where things get tricky. What did George mean?

Well, there's plenty of quotes where he says Jedi can feel emotions, namely love... what does he say about fear, specifically?

Okay, so that sounds a helluva lot like what Yoda says. Or rather, Yoda sounds a helluva lot like George.

If we go by the idea that the Jedi are, "dunking on Anakin and chastising him for being afraid because they've lost their way and now repress their emotions"... then it's inconsistent with what George Lucas was saying in the above quotes, because he clearly agrees with Yoda and uses the character as a vector to get his own ideas across.

It'd also wouldn't track with what we see in The Gathering, during The Clone Wars, in which we see that to gain their kyber crystal, a Jedi must overcome their weaknesses - including facing their fears.

So either George wanted us to think the Jedi Council collectively decided, on that specific day, to say "to hell with everything we stand for: fuck this kid in particular, just because"... or that's not how we're meant to read the scene.

I'd say the only reading that is consistent with everything George said is the following:

Anakin is afraid, he misses his mom. Which is normal.

The Jedi sense this and ask him how he feels, hoping he'll have the sense of admitting to this feeling (first step towards solving a problem is acknowledging there is one).

Anakin refuses to admit he's afraid, even after they explain that they know he is. He doesn't see what him being afraid has to do with anything.

Yoda explains the dangers of unchecked fear. If you don’t address or overcome it, it'll eventually lead to suffering and the Dark Side.

So Anakin being afraid isn’t the issue in itself, it’s that he won’t even acknowledge that that fear is there. Which, again, is completely normal, but a Jedi is supposed to be above that... and Anakin's age makes it so that he'll have a hard time learning this.

Hence why they initially decide he won't be trained.

So Lucas was clearly going for a classic Yoda moment, like "do or do not" in Empire Strikes Back… but to most people, the way the scene is written makes the Council seems cold, unfeeling, and dunking on a 9-year-old and makes Qui-Gon look like the reasonable one.

Could George have conveyed his intent more clearly?

Now, another writer might have decided to illustrate this philosophical lesson about unchecked fear differently, in a way that makes the Jedi seem kinder, less detached and more relatable. Lucas will be the first to admit that he’s not that writer.

"I'd be the first person to say I can't write dialogue. My dialogue is very utilitarian and is designed to move things forward. I'm not Shakespeare. It's not designed to be poetic. It's not designed to have a clever turn of phrase. [...] Dialogue isn't my strength. I use it as a device. I don't particularly like dialogue which is part of the problem." - EMPIRE, 1999

He writes dialog that takes you from point A to point B. The bottom line is Anakin's got too much fear and that he's too old? He'll stick to that bottom line.

It also doesn't help that, well, we're only shown Anakin as a sweet child, without being shown the traits that make the Council go "hmmm maybe not".

Like, the more explicit way would be to show the Council having a vision of death and destruction and Anakin standing in the middle of it... but you wouldn't even need to go that far.

Originally the scene went on for just a tad longer, with the Council prodding Anakin more and the latter screaming "I'M NOT AFRAID!" in anger.

Thus proving Yoda's point, that there's some unchecked fear and anger in him which - due to his age - will be difficult for him to master.

This was cut from the final movie, but was kept in printed editions of the script and the novelizations.

Interestingly, there was also this other deleted scene, where Anakin gets in a fight with a young Greedo, after the latter accused him of cheating at the Boonta Eve race.

According to this commentary, the scene was cut (to Rick McCallum's dismay) because George felt that - while it showed Anakin had a temper - it didn't really establish his character one way or the other, in the scope of The Phantom Menace.

And therein lies the issue, right?

George isn't building a cinematic universe, he's not making a TV series: he's making 3 movies, each about 2 hours long.

There's a short amount of time and a looot of stuff he'd like to say about how a good kid becomes a bad man and how a democracy becomes a dictatorship, and all the other subplots regarding symbiosis etc... that's a lot of things for a movie.

So when he's structuring how the Prequels explore the first theme, it's done as such:

First movie: Show Anakin was a sweet kid, hint at his fear.

Second movie: Show Anakin's other flaws, his love for Padmé & Shmi's death, which will eventually increase his fear and mark the first step toward his fall to the Dark Side.

Third movie: Anakin's fear of losing Padmé causes his fall.

And that's it. Nothing happens outside these movies.

A project with a larger scope (or one that only focused on Anakin's rise and fall) might've explored how Anakin felt growing up in the Temple alongside other already-trained Jedi, his trauma from his days as a slave, his anger issues, whether he ever asked the Jedi to go back and rescue his Mom, more details on his friendship with Obi-Wan, how Palpatine manipulated him from day one...

In that project, you'd put those deleted scenes and lines back in.

But this ain't that project. This is the space equivalent of a fairy tale.

So, to Lucas, none of the above factor into the story about Anakin's downfall, by virtue of not being in the movies.

Which makes it unrealistic to a majority of viewers. But George (indie experimental filmmaker with a vision) had a very specific thesis he was going for:

So at some point we're left with two choices.

1. "Death of the Author"

If George's thesis wasn't conveyed clearly enough, or executed well enough and what you saw killed your suspension of disbelief, or if you plainly disagree with George's view on fear... then obviously, go to town with heacanons, go with the "Jedi are dunking on Anakin 'cause they lost their way" interpretation.

Sure, it's not what George Lucas was going for, but as my friend who I mentioned at the start said to me more recently: "Who cares? Either the Jedi are intentionally meant to be seen as arrogant, emotionless a-holes, or the Prequels are bad movies."

Which I disagree with, but hey :D

2. Seeing the scene the way it was originally intended.

This is the one I'm going with. If you still like George's thesis and see it clearly when you watch the Prequels, then great.

In that moment, Qui-Gon - while ultimately correct about Anakin being the Chosen One - is being rash and trying to force Anakin in a mold the Council and Obi-Wan know he'll struggle to fit in. In that moment, they're in the right, he's in the wrong, and Anakin is caught in the middle. And that's pretty much it.

In the end, the most important part of that whole scene is the message "fear leads to anger, hate and suffering". And these are movies for kids. And as a kid... I got the message.

So the scene did its job with high scores, as far as I'm concerned.

[eriexplosion]

Yesterday everyone was posting their feelings on TBB. I'm glad I waited, because there's a lot swirling around. Cut for negativity again.

I was introduced to The Bad Batch in August 2022 and fell instantly in love. The characters, the story, the complex family dynamics, they all spoke to me. I wasn't even a Star Wars fan but I went through and devoured The Clone Wars, Rebels, The Mandalorian, all of it. I threw myself into this world and adored every second of it. I must have rewatched season one over five times before season two even came out.

When season two premiered I loved it. Every Tuesday night I stayed up until the episode drop and devoured it immediately. I looked ahead at the schedule and took days off work for the double episodes, for the big Crosshair episodes - he was my favorite early on and season two only made that grow. But season two also really brought Tech into my radar even more. I had always liked him, but here he was shining. The Crossing really solidified it, as an autistic person. I'd never heard someone describe the difference in processing so succinctly before, so clearly, and it spoke to me like very little had. Here was a character that was like me. Here was a character that I needed when I was an undiagnosed child, someone that would have made me feel like I had at least some way of describing my differences.

Then, well. He died. It was an affecting scene, but it felt out of nowhere, it felt unfinished. Tech didn't even get the climax of the episode. He just fell into the clouds, the Batch grieved for a few minutes, and then the plot steamrolled right along.

I didn't believe it, not after the mad scientist presented his goggles and claimed not to salvage anything else. It seemed like such an obvious fake out. The longer I sat with it the less satisfying it felt. It felt so brushed over, so pointless, all for a mission that they accomplished nothing on. Then came the social media circus. Again and again his fall was shoved in our faces on Twitter, demanding we stream it. TikToks were made that were so out of touch they felt like parodies, the wound ripped open again and again, and I thought surely there had to be a purpose to it.

So I waited for season 3 as interviews were done that seemed to almost intentionally avoid calling him dead. As tweets were made promising we'd be so fulfilled if we could only see who was onscreen in the mid-season! (A tweet that immediately garnered dozens of people hoping it referred to Tech, all without a single comment to try and quell the speculation.) It felt already like we were being toyed with, but I thought it had to be for a reason or a purpose. More weirdly vague discussions went up about his Sacrifice, his Fall, his Anything But Death, even as everyone insists that it was so meaningful, the way he died on a mission that accomplished nothing. Jokes were made around Valentines Day.

He Fell For You, get it?

The first official use of killed went up on the databank right after the trailer, on Hunter's page of all places. The first time the interviews used dead was the Friday before the premier. It all felt too late, theories had already grown for months by that point.

Season 3 finally came and I waited up for every episode drop just like I did for season 2, hoping for him to come back or at least for him to be properly grieved, since we had barely a couple of minutes in Plan 99 before it was swept away for the next plot point. Surely Tech's impact deserved an episode of focus, if he were really gone.

The previously on plays his last words twice. But then we skip months into the future. We don't see Crosshair find out the news - even though Tech died on a mission to retrieve him. We don't watch Omega grieve. She barely seems to notice she's missing a brother. We got a brief allusion in episode two. It took three episodes to even mention his name in passing. Five episodes in everyone got their chance to look sad about him, but only for a few seconds and only when his skills were relevant. Compared to the gorgeous callback to Mayday in the same episode, it felt shallow. He had to have been more important than this didn't he?

Episodes 6 & 7 felt like maybe there was a reason. We see a new masked assassin that gets extra focus, who got put through a series of Tech-adjacent situations, whose beef with Crosshair was just a little too personal, who survived longer than all the rest but stayed masked. Rex talks about losing brothers, but Hunter says nothing about the brother they lost. I hoped it all meant something, that this was the reason that he felt so much like he was thrown away, so that he could come back in.

More one off mentions that only really come up when it's about how useful Tech would have been. More poking at the wound that still felt open and raw because we'd never gotten any closure. The closest we get is a single scene in episode eleven, so late in the season and so brief that I thought that couldn't possibly be it.

CX-2 comes back, and he talks like Tech. He's still not unmasked. I really need him to be something because otherwise what was it all for?

The most emotion comes in Juggernaut, from Phee. Its a highlight because it actually feels like it was about him, like he mattered as a person. It's episode twelve and we finally talk about him like a person. We never saw her get the news either.

Episodes thirteen and fourteen pass without any mentions at all. We're running out of time. Episode 15 hits and we get one raw one from Crosshair that Clone Force 99 died with Tech. It's the first time they directly say he's dead in so many words. It's the season finale. CX-2 is a nobody it turns out, and he dies faceless. Everyone gets a happy ending and after over a year of wondering if we'd ever get closure, it turns out Tech's just dead. But look how happy everyone else is!

Everyone gets to grow old. Except the autistic one of course. He's just dead and it hardly feels like it mattered at all. Did you know Wrecker and Hunter don't use his name once in season three? Omega and Echo mention him once each. Crosshair twice, only once with any emotion behind it. Phee tops the charts at three mentions, two by name and one by nickname. We see his goggles four times. I kept count.

There was never a bigger plan, this was just all he was worth. We spent two seasons on Crosshair's absence. We spent a whole episode dealing with it when Echo decided to go with Rex. Tech dies though and all his life amounted to was a handful of mentions when his skills would have been useful, some shots of his broken goggles, and endless cooing out of the text over how meaningful his sacrifice was. Too meaningful to take back, of course, even as Ventress is brought back from her own sacrifice.

I had really, really thought that this time autistic life would be worth more than autistic death. That a character that felt so carefully handled couldn't have just been thrown away for shock value, barely to even be mentioned again, his memory used to string us along to keep us watching. If you added up every mention and shot through season 3 it might actually clock in at less time than was spent on Mayday's send off.

I'm an adult. I'll survive, though the sting of seeing yet another character like me used as a stepping stone for everyone else's happy ending will take a while to fade. But I think about the child I used to be who needed a character like Tech. And I think about how it would have felt to actually get that only to watch him die a handful of episodes later as a side note to his family's story, barely even mentioned again. How badly it would have hurt, how deep it would have scarred.

I'm not that child anymore. But there are a lot of autistic kids out there that are the same as I used to be, and they're learning for the first time that people like us don't get happy endings. Instead they die so that everyone around them can rise up, and they might even get mentioned a few times. But don't worry. Everyone will tell you how meaningful and special it is and how delusional you were to ever hope for anything else.

The Bad Batch still means a lot to me. I think it always will. I love the characters. I love the family, and all the potential they had. But the sting of not belonging in this happy ending is there, and it's deep. It's been a long time since I trusted a show. It'll be a long time before I risk trusting another. And I hope that the autistic kids trying to learn how to close their hearts off behind new walls are doing okay.

[shayyprasad]

faults | peter parker

summary: peter's a nice guy, you liked him. key word being liked.

warning: non-con, slut-shaming (no nsfw/smut)

pairing: dark!peter x fem!reader

word count: 1.4k+ words (i've never done dark!peter before, just playing around with the idea)

check out my masterlist!

this can technically be read as either a 2nd part to this, or a stand-alone!

if you want to be added to the taglist, let me know!

(first person)

loud music drummed in my ears as narrowly avoided people. if i'm being honest, i'm not quite sure why i agreed to this in the first place.

aliyah, my best friend of seven years, was dead-set on planning a party for me. what type of person would i be to let her down like that? so naturally, i agreed, right?

only now was i regretting this.

the thing is, when she said "party", i thought she meant a couple people. maybe some school friends. i thought that spencer, this guy i just recently started going out with would be there too, but he's just ghosted me. like completely.

i haven't heard from him or anything, sucks, kinda.

...peter. he'd was coming, too.

i wasn't sure what was going on between us. it was subtle flirting, and i thought it was platonic. don't get me wrong, i really did like him at first, but now i'm not sure.

yeah, he's hot. but also not my type. granted, i don't really have a type, though i do think we'd be better off as friends. also, he wasn't the same as he used to be. and i know something's changed, even if i can't pinpoint what it is.

but lately, i'm not sure if we're on the same page about that. everyone thinks we're dating, because apparently you can't be just friends with a guy.

i'm genuinely unsure how to break that to him.

we did try one date, if you could even call it that. peter took me to the movies, but he never quite clarified what it was.

technically, i was a minor at that time, so maybe it was a friendly thing.

it didn't matter though, i told him that i wasn't interested in him. also... spencer, right?

spencer was a guy i'd been talking to, and i won't lie, he's pretty cute. 

i don't know. i try not to think about it because it makes my brain hurt. so, uh, yeah. that's that.

lost in my ever loving train of thoughts, i wasn't watching where i was going, and i ran into someone.

not just someone.

peter, of all people. the one guy i was trying to avoid.

lovely. absolutely lovely.

"heyyy, birthday girl! how's the party?"

"uh. yeah, it's... awesome," i winced.

"not your scene? okay, but, like, bright side?" he paused, as if he were waiting for me to say something, but when i didn't, he continued. "you're a legal adult! not a minor anymore, right?"

he had this unusual twinkle in his eye, like there was more to unpack. peter pulled me close to him, chugging wherever it was in the red solo cup he had in his hand.

pete's hand... was lower than comfortable, but i figured it was best not to say anything.

it was obvious he was totally out of it, and i inhaled sharply at the sharp stench of alcohol.

"wanna get out of here?" he asked, gripping me harder.

"um..." i wasn't sure what he was implying, because he literally could. not. take me anywhere.

"c'mon."

"wait, i—"

too late. i was already being dragged out the door. pete brought me out in front of his car... well, his old truck.

"no, no, no. you're way too drunk to drive, peter. you aren't taking me anywhere."

he groaned, rolling his eyes. "buzzkill."

i inhaled sharply, stopping myself from getting upset. he wouldn't normally do something like this... right?

"all right, fine, fine," he slurred. "h-how about... ooh! let's go to my place!"

i hesitated, unsure of how comfortable i felt with that. especially since he'd been so weird, with all the touching. i knew that he didn't live in a dorm and—

wait, what?

no, no. peter and i were friends, and i could trust him, right? it could have been the alcohol that was making the edges of my brain turn fuzzy, but i finally agreed.

"um, okay."

"mm. it's like..." pete hiccuped, and mentally facepalmed. "somewhere here."

"you're lucky i know the way, dummy." i said, smacking his head. he did nothing but grin back at me.

we walked in silence, or i did really, while he babbled on about the most random things. i didn't mind it, considering he was drunk.

it was chilly outside, and the cold air nipped at my skin, making me shiver. peter must have noticed this, because he swung a hand over my shoulders, lazily pulling me close.

i thought it best not to say anything, and also, he was warm. so, i guess i wasn't complaining all that much.

eventually, we got to his place. he fumbled with the keys, trying to shove it into the lock. unsuccessfully, might i add.

getting tired, i took them from him, unlocking the door.

"there we go." i pushed him inside, shutting the door behind me. "how about we get you come water?" peter didn't argue as i pulled open a cabinet, grabbing a cup. i filled it up with water for him and handed it over.

"drink it. all of it."

"yes, mom."

it seemed like that helped him sober up slightly, and i flopped down on the couch. that party had exhausted me altogether. peter was quiet as he sat down next to me, rubbing his eyes.

he looked over at me, but i kept my eyes fixed at the tv in front. i was flipping though channels, trying to find something good.

"look at me," he whispered.

i sucked in a breath, turning my head to do so, "yeah?"

and then, that's when it happened. so quickly and roughly, i didn't even register it. because one second we were face to face, and the next, he was grabbing my face, kissing me.

instantly, i pulled away, looking at him in horror. "what the fuck, peter? you can't— you can't do that!"

"do what?" he stared dumbly.

i just blinked at him, confused. "i..."

he kissed me, without consent. that wasn't okay, right? peter just looked at me, raising an eyebrow. was this because he was drunk?

"well, i- you just kissed me?"

"so? i thought you were chill. besides, you were basically asking for this."

what did he mean? asking for it? i wasn't asking for anything. i didn't even like him like that, and i thought he knew that. well, i mean, i was pretty sure. kind of. 

"b-but i wasn't." i was trying to make my voice more firm, but it probably (most likely) sounded very pathetic. clearing my throat, i tried again, "peter, i don't like you that way. as a friend, of course, but not... not more than that. this one time it's okay, since i guess it's also on me for not making that clear."

"don't like me that way? are you serious?"

"well-"

"you come around, to my house, dressed in that, and you expect me to think we're just friends? i did you the favor of waiting until you were 'of legal age' and all that crap, so what the fuck are you on about?"

"pe-"

"you've literally been sleazing around like a slut, practically begging for attention."

no, he was reading this wrong. i met him at the cafe i worked at, and we hit it off. as friends. besides, he was older than me. well, not by much, but still. and what did he mean by "slut"? it was my birthday party! that i didn't even want to be at! peter was the one who invited me here, right?

"and, on top of that, you've been leading me on. now that's fucked up."

"leading-? yes, okay, maybe a little. and- and i'm really sorry about that, but-" i backed up into the couch, trying to move away from him.

"i love you, y/n/n. and," he scoffed, "and i can treat you way better then any of these other guys."

love? he loves me? how- we've only known each other for a couple months. 

i thought, if anything, this was platonic flirting. was this really my fault?

"i think i should go, peter, we can talk later." i was uncomfortable now. no, past that.

i was scared. 

peter was scaring me.

"i'm not into you, and i'm-"

"seeing that other guy?" he finished. "what was his name, again? spencer? ever wonder what happened to him?" there was a dangerous look in his eye, and that's all it took for me to understand.

"oh my god, what did you do?"

"what i needed to," peter pinned my hands above the wall, "i was gonna wait, and do this the nice way, but you've left me with no choice."

"no, please, peter," i choked out, tears streaming down my face. 

"this is your fault, y/n."

and it must have been. i hurt him, so this was only fair. 

right?

taglist!

@whatsupstark

[misc-obeyme]

Be Careful of Bedheads

For once in my life, I'm actually ahead on a series lol. I wrote this days ago, Simeon's is already done, and Satan's is partway finished. And these are the last three of this series. Though I have a couple extras I wanted to do so maybe I'll have some bonus ones? Maybe I'll do another secret scene smut sequel? I'm thinking about it.

Anyway, I'm actually really fond of Belphie. He gives me such petulant emo boy vibes and that is so fun to write.

I'd also like to mention that I took some artistic liberties in the description of Lucifer's office. When I looked at the picture of it again, there is indeed a sort of balcony area for the bookshelves. I just expanded on that a little bit. I also tried to keep the description of MC's hair vague so it could look like anything. Not sure how successful that was, but I did try!

GN!MC x Belphegor

Warnings: just a little bit of kissing at the end

BELPHEGOR Hey. I forgot to say when I passed you by in the hallway earlier. Your hair's sticking up in the back.

MC Yours too, Belphie.

BELPHEGOR Huh? Argh, you're right. You should have told me earlier. Though I suppose I don't mind as much if we're matching.

You laughed and shook your head at Belphie's texts. Still, you thought you should probably fix your hair before the two of you went out for the day. You turned around and started back down the hallway.

Just as you were about to pass the twins' room, Belphie came out, his hair just as messed up as it was when you saw it earlier.

He looked at you with a petulant expression, as if daring you to say something about it.

You tried to hold in a laugh while you grabbed his hand. "C'mon, let me fix it for you."

Belphie looked like he was about to protest, but he didn't get the chance as you started back down the hall, dragging him along behind you. After a minute, his hand closed around yours and he let you lead the way.

You pulled him into the bathroom and stopped in front of the mirror. You looked at yourself standing side by side with Belphie, hands still clasped, both of you with your hair sticking out oddly in the back. You tried very hard not to laugh again, the smile fighting with the edges of your mouth.

Belphie was frowning. He closed his eyes and sighed. "It's fine, you can laugh."

You finally gave in, laughing into the hand that wasn't holding Belphie's. "Come on, it's pretty funny."

Belphie gave you one of his soft laughs and your stomach fluttered as he finally smiled. "Okay, it is kinda funny."

You let go of his hand, picked up a brush from the counter, and moved behind him. You ran your fingers through his hair for a moment. Then you used the brush, carefully ensuring that the strands were no longer askew. You took your time, savoring the closeness and the excuse to touch Belphie's soft hair.

But you couldn't brush his hair too long without it getting weird, so when you were satisfied with how it was laying, you put the brush down.

You looked at him in the mirror again and folded your arms. "There," you said. "That's better, right?"

Belphie ran a hand down his hair. "Yeah," he said. Then he picked up the brush. "Now let me fix yours."

You snatched the brush out of his hands. "No way," you said. "I can do it myself! It's not as bad as yours anyway."

"Come on, MC," Belphie said, taking the brush back from you. "I let you do mine. It's only fair."

You huffed. "Fine," you said.

You told Belphie exactly what he needed to do to fix the issue with your hair and he complied easily, using whatever tools or products you instructed him to use. The feeling of his fingers on your scalp was relaxing and you found yourself feeling a little sleepy by the time he was done.

"There," he said. "Now you're done, too. Do you still want to go shopping today?"

"If you still want to go, then sure," you said.

Belphie shrugged. "I don't mind, but you seem kind of sleepy. Are you sure you don't want to take a nap instead?"

You looked at him askance. "Are you sure you don't want to take a nap instead?"

"I always want to take a nap," Belphie said. "But if we do, it might mess up our hair again."

"And we can always fix it again," you said.

Belphie didn't seem to need much more encouragement than that. This time he grabbed you by the hand, pulling you out of the bathroom and back down the hallway.

"Where are we going?" you asked as he took you right past his own bedroom door.

"We can't nap in my room or your room or even the attic," he said. "Everybody will think to look for us in those places. But Lucifer's out of the house today, so…"

"So?" you asked, confused.

Belphie didn't elaborate, only pulled you along. Eventually you found yourself in Lucifer's office.

"Um," you said as Belphie continued to lead you through the room.

He took you to one of the sets of stairs that went up to a small balcony above the room. From below, it looked like this was only a thin balcony with a set of bookshelves, but as you followed Belphie to the end of it, you found it opened up just a little and created a kind of small alcove by the window.

Already in this alcove was a pile of pillows and blankets, creating a little nest.

"I sneak up here sometimes when Lucifer's gone," Belphie said. "Because nobody ever thinks to look for me here."

You laughed softly and shook your head. "I should have known you would have a little hideaway for napping like this. Does Lucifer know about it?"

Belphie sighed. "He didn't at first, but he figured it out. He didn't make me move all my blankets, but he usually doesn't let me stay when he's working."

Belphie pulled you down onto the soft collection of pillows, tugging a blanket over both of you as he settled by your side. The two of you faced each other and you snuggled down into Belphie's chest as he wrapped an arm around your back.

You felt Belphie's fingers on your head again, caressing you gently like he was fixing your hair again. It was such a nice, soft feeling that you felt your eyelids getting heavy already.

Just before you felt like you might drift off, you propped yourself up on an elbow. Belphie looked up at you, startled, not moving.

You watched his eyes for a moment before leaning forward and kissing him.

Belphie was so surprised, he gasped against your lips, but a second later you felt his arms around you again, pulling you down on top of him. He responded easily to the feeling of you, keeping his mouth open, allowing you to deepen things if you wanted to.

Maybe you did. But Belphie was right. Nobody found you there in Lucifer's office until much later, when Lucifer finally came home from wherever he had been. He climbed the stairs to find you and Belphie asleep in each other's arms, but instead of waking you up, he simply took a book off the shelf and went back down to his desk.

others in this series:

Mammon | Barbatos | Solomon | Lucifer | Simeon

Leviathan | Asmodeus | Diavolo | Beelzebub | Satan

masterlist | Thank you for reading!

[sinsandsweetness]

Desperate (sex and zombies- chapter 14)

pairing- {Daryl x fem!reader}

summary- You find yourself needing a helping hand.

warning- 18+ content, immediate smut, no plot just absolute filth, humiliation, dirty talk, fingering, slight crybaby reader?

notes- If you are here for the overall plot, this scene would be placed back in the prison, before things actually pick up with Rick. During the week while they are ignoring each other because he lost it on her.

*For that sweet anon who wanted another Daryl chapter; I assumed you liked 'transient' because of his attitude and dirty talk, so I tried to keep that in. Let me know if this satisfied your needs <3

You laid there, shaking and whimpering like a little bitch. Overaware of your own sounds, covered in a light sheen of sweat, with the sheets kicked to the edge of the bed. Hand in your shorts, and fingers stuffed up your cunt as far as you could manage. It wasn't enough. You'd been at it for an hour at least. Breathing all heavy and fucking your own hand, trying to find some kind of relief in the heat of the non air conditioned prison. Sexually frustrated from... well everything really. Rick mostly. Him losing it on you. You were avoiding him like the plague, afraid to make him any more mad. Afraid that he'd hold a grudge, and that you'd never even have a shot with him. As silly as it sounded, it is what you'd wanted from the start, so you really didn't want to fuck up your chances now.

You picked up your pace, bucking your hips further onto the three digits you'd managed to fit in your sopping wet pussy. A pool of slick had already dampened the sheets below, proving just how desperate you were to finish. Fuck. Why can't you finish? It's not like you'd never touched yourself before. You knew your own body. Right?

You were just stressed. At least that's what you figured. Stressed from the farm, and being on the road, and then the prison. Everything that had happened since arriving. It was really dampening your mood. 

You let out a frustrated cry and bit your lip hard, trying to contain your emotions, still finger fucking yourself as fast as you were able to, but every time you thought you were close, it would just disappear. A salty tear slipped down the side of your face. Oh my god. How pathetic are you? You can't even make your own self c-

"Hey- Oh shit." 

You ripped your hand out of your shorts and immediately went for the sheets, pulling them up to cover your embarrassment.

"What the fuck Daryl, have you never heard of knocking?!"

"Sorry I didn't know you were- I thought you had a headache..." Daryl stood, rather awkwardly right at the entrance of your cell. The curtain swaying slightly from where he'd just interrupted your, not so peaceful, privacy.

"I did-" you took a deep breath. You actually did, a few hours ago. And then you woke up feeling much better and weirdly aroused from some dream you couldn't quite remember. So you thought, what better time then to rub one out while no-one would bother you. 

Your whole face was on fire, the humiliation of the situation setting in completely. "Just get out please." You covered your eyes with your hands and the sheet, attempting to shield your entire self from his gaze. No way were you coming now.

"Were you- uh, were you touchin' yourself?" His mouth was curled into a funny little smirk.

"Get. Out. " You said through your teeth, this time looking up at him, giving your absolute best death glare. 

He stepped closer, confusion forming on his brows.

"Were you crying? " He asked, taking a couple steps closer, making your whole body burn bright red. Ohmygod just leave already. 

"No." You quickly wiped away the wetness on you cheek.

"Well it looks like you were crying."

"I just- can you get the hell out please. Fuckin' seriously." 

"Hey," his face softened at your tone. "I'm not tryna be mean okay. I was just checking up on you. Thought I'd bring you some water." He waved the bottle in the air, the sound of the liquid splashing around inside the plastic.

You didn't answer, instead just trying to focus on your heart rate that wouldn't calm the hell down. 

"Why were you crying?" He asked, really sincere this time. 

"I can't-" you sighed again. Pulling your knees up and burying face as you admitted the reason. "I can't finish. It's- I don't know, it's like I'm broken or something."

"You're not broken," He sat on the edge of the bed, a hint of amusement in his voice. He was way too close for comfort, and the fact that your sleep shorts were soaked through with your own wetness didn't help. "You're propably just stressed. A lot's been happening."

You nodded into your knee, not caring to make eye contact with the man. You'd asked him to leave a million times already and he clearly wasn't listening.

"You want some help?" He offered, hand coming up to your calf, gently squeezing it. 

You scoffed an almost laugh. "Um no. I want you to leave."

"You uh... You sure?" His eyes travelled down to the wet spot on the bed, which you quickly moved to cover with your leg.

"Daryl I swear to fucking god-"

"Hey-" he moved forward, hands on your legs, pushing them apart and leaning in to you. "Relax. You've helped me out once or twice, c'mon. Let me. Last I checked, you can finish with me... Unless you've been fakin' it or somethin'..." 

"Ugh." You fell back in frustration, head hitting the cushiony pillow below. "You don't get it. I've been trying for an hour and it just like..." You tried to come up with how to describe it. "Like it's never enough, I get so close and then it just... it hurts." 

"So you gave yourself blue balls?"

What a freakin' boy. "Yeah, I guess if that's what you wanna call it." You rolled your eyes, propping yourself up on elbows, seeing him in between your legs. A patient look on his face. His bulging muscles extra apparent in his tight black long sleeve. Jesus Christ he was just making it worse.

"Try again." He suggested.

"I've been trying Daryl. It's not fuckin' working."

"Just," he grabbed your hand, and positioned at your core. "Let me see. Try again. Touch yourself."

The second the words left his mouth you felt a jolt in your pelvic muscles. His energy shifted from playful to possessive. 

"I don't really-"

"It's nothing I haven't seen before." He counter argued. True. Though it felt different. More... intimate. Being on display wasn't really your thing.

"C'mhere." He tugged at your legs, pulling you down the bed and settling himself on the other end, one leg crossed under himself as the other hung over the tiny mattress, foot planted on the ground. "Take your shorts off."

You still felt the pink on your cheeks but the thought of actually finishing did help tame some of the embarrassment. You shimmied out of the shorts, tossing them to the ground. 

"Shirt too."

"Daryl-" You warned. He was pushing boundaries for sure. 

"Take the shirt off." His eyes were dark and you couldn't help but stare at the very prominent outline pulling at the denim of his jeans. 

You swallowed hard and took the top off in one fluid motion, nipples immediately forming little peaks on your supple breasts. He licked his lips, hands twitching, ready to touch you, but holding back. Situating himself even further into the mattress. 

"Well go on, show me what you were doin' before I walked in here."

You shook your head at him. 

"Do it. Or I won't touch you at all. Is that what you want? Do you want me to leave you here all hot and bothered? Or do you wanna come?"

"I wanna come." You whispered. So quiet it was a shock he even heard.

"Then go on. Show me." 

You closed your eyes and let your head fall back. Trying to escape into the marshmallowy mattress. And despite your reluctance, your fingers trailed down your stomach and reached your clit. Rubbing it a few times and falling on a circular pattern. Breath steadily moving your chest up and down, as you went to grab at your nipple with your other hand. Pinching it a little, trying to emulate what Daryl often liked to do to you.

"That's sure hot n' all, but it definitely ain't what you were doin' when I walked in."

You let out an unintentional sound at the thought of him watching. The thought of him being turned on by you touching yourself. You moved your hand even lower, middle finger dragging through your wetness and back up, spreading it onto your clit. Then dipping down again and inserting one digit. You swore you could hear Daryls breath hitch. You continued pumping in and out and soon added another finger.

"Look so pretty like this, all wet and needy." He said, his own hand finally making its way to your leg. Pushing you open so he could see you even better. "How's it feel?"

"Uh- It- It's ok," You grunted out, curling your fingers towards yourself, trying to focus on the end goal and not the way he was staring right into you.

"Relax your shoulders." He demanded, shifting around on the bed. "And breath." You did as he said, not realizing how tense you were. You stayed there with your eyes closed and your mind started drifting to thoughts about his own fingers instead. 

"I don't think it's working Daryl." You huffed as you slipped your fingers out, rubbing them both on your clit from side to side.

"It's workin' for me." He quipped. A hand now on your thigh, squeezing down on the muscle of your quad. 

Another tear escaped your eye with a shaky breath. What the actual fuck was wrong with you. 

"Aw baby, don't cry." He leaned over you, an adorable smirk plastered on his face, as he wiped the frustrated tear from your face. "Why don't you keep rubbing and I'll try and help you out, okay? I ain't gonna leave you here like this alright?" 

You nodded pathetically up at him. His dark hair falling into his eyes as he dipped down and placed a sweet kiss on your belly.

"Don't you fuckin' tease me Dixon I swear-" 

"-to fucking god, yeah, I know." He kissed downwards once more, closer to where your hands had come to a stop, right above your clit. "I didn't tell you to stop, did I?"

You whimpered. Absolutely aching for his beautiful eight inches to be filling up your cunt, destroying your cervix and making you cream all over him and those jeans he always kept half way on.

You kept rubbing fast circles onto your puffy nub. His own hand moved to your slit, startling you a little, at first. But as soon as he had three fingers, knuckle deep and fucking right into your sweet spot, you could barely form a cohesive thought. Just Him. His pretty blue eyes, his biceps flexing as he worked you into a writhing mess. His deep southern voice whispering a plethora of dirty little comments. One in particular, telling you to shut the fuck up before Rick walked in and caught you being a desperate little slut. It was working. Whatever he was doing was clearly working, because you could feel the extremely overdue orgasm starting to build. The familiar feeling of a knot forming in your stomach. Ready to unravel. 

"How are you so good at that?" You asked him through laboured breaths, involuntarily fucking yourself onto his hand. Not that he minded. His eyes were glossed over and locked in on what he was trying, and very much succeeding at doing. 

"You gonna come for me baby?" He ignored your question.

"Yeah I'm - Yes. yes." You would. At that pace you definitely would. He moved your hand out of the way and dipped down, pressing a hot open mouthed kiss to your clit. He huffed out a laugh against you at your reaction. Tightening around his fingers and letting out the most pathetic sob he'd heard all day. The vibration of his laugh sending you into orbit. He sucked on your clit as he curled his fingers, physically pulling the orgasm right out of you. Your head shot up off the mattress and your hands went right to his hair, keeping him held down, "Don't stop, Don't stop-" You moaned, feeling your core shake as you finally climaxed. The orgasm itself lasting a record breaking amount of time, until the tongue on your pussy was just too much and he pulled his fingers out, glistening white with your cum. 

"Think you made a little mess sunshine." He said, licking clean each of his fingers. The sight making your stomach do a backflip. You could feel the rest of your cum on the sheets below, all wet and gooey. You could already go again. Actually you needed to. Even though you had finally finished, you wanted him. To feel every thick inch of him fucking you into another mind blowing orgasm.

"You got one more in there for me?" He asked, as if reading your mind. Leaning himself back up and starting at his belt.

"Yes daddy." You clamped both hands onto your mouth. Why the fuck would you say that? His eyes got all big as he grinned at your response. 

He chuckled, "Y'know I won't make fun of you for that today, with you cryin' and all, but I hope you know I won’t forget that." 

You groaned. Knowing it would come back to bite you in the ass. "Please can we just-"

"I got it." He pushed you back down, settling between your legs. His cock seeming a lot more intimidating than you previously remembered. Standing proud in his hand as he jerked himself a few times, aligning himself between your legs. He pushed himself in, throwing his head back as he grunted. The pressure making you both moan.

"So fuckin' wet for me aren't you?"

"Yes, all for you Daryl, so fuckin' wet..." you trailed off, eyes rolling back into your skull. He fucked you hard and slow, drawing it out nice and long. He was so used to quickies in a car or in the basement of an abandoned house, that he'd forgotten what it felt like to actually fuck someone. To really experience it. And was he ever experiencing it. His pupils completely blown, watching you squirm on his cock. His shirt pushed half up his abdomen, hands gripping your thighs and positioning them wherever he wanted. As soon as he had them up and over his shoulders, that tight, burning sensation hit the sides of your nose, forcing a few more tears out of your pretty doe eyes. Out of pure pleasure this time instead of pain.

Eventually he moved both your legs to the side, contorting you into a twisted mess of sobs. Grabbing your face and forcing you to watch his pelvis slam against your asscheeks over and over. That's it. With the grip on your jaw, and his cock buried deep, you let out a raspy moan, tugging on the comforter until your knuckles were white, signalling you reaching your climax. You didn't even have to let him know. You let the feeling wash through your core as he fucked you through it. He pulled out quickly and shot thick white ropes onto your skin and the sheets below. Too far gone to care that you'd need a shower, even though you'd already taken one that morning.

"Fuck." You whispered, as he collapsed down next to you, pulling his boxers back up.

"Yeah..." He was out of breath, Just laying next to you, hand moving to tickle a pattern onto your knee. You grabbed the sheets, pulling them up and wiping off.

"Hand me that sweater, will you?"

He grabbed the oversized sweater off the ground, handing it to you, you slipped it over your head and climbed halfway over him, reaching into your bag and grabbing some clean boy shorts, slipping them on as well. Then collapsing right back next to Daryl. To rest your shaky legs.

"I told you, you aren't broken." He tickled your thigh, biting back a laugh as you smacked his shoulder. 

"God you're such an asshole." You chuckled along with him. 

"What's that baby? You think daddy's actin' like an asshole?'

Your smile dropped and you could almost feel the tears forming again. "You promised..."  He'd already forced a few too many emotions out of you for the day. You just didn't have it in you to take the jokes at your expense anymore.

"I'm sorry!" He put his hands up in surrender. "Seriously!" He smiled sweetly at you. You let him take your hand, pulling you up off the bed. "C'mon, let's go get you washed up. They're probably making' supper right now."

The entire time you ate, he kept grazing the bare skin of your thighs, toying with the hem of your sweater and glancing at you through his peripheral. It was a miracle that no one asked why you were blushing so hard.

[waitmyturtles]

THE MORNING AFTER: ONLY FRIENDS, EPISODE 5 ("CH-CH-CH-CHANGES / TURN AND FACE THE STRANGE") EDITION

Well, well, FUCKING well. Man, I am REELING. THAT. Was a HELL of an episode of a drama. Jojo and his team need to applaud themselves.

Let me set this up by sharing with y’all a tweet that really stuck with me after episode 4, but I think it’s pertinent to episode 5:

Now, yes -- this is a touch of a generalization (many of my queer friends are straight-edge-and-or-early-to-bed-while-living-in-cities folx), but I want to note something important in this tweet.

Before I got started on episode 5 last night, after having seen a lot of the meta and reactions on my dash throughout the day, I shot a note to dear @ranchthoughts that I thought I'd have to get a little #oldmom on this episode. Speaking to chibi's note above: toxicity happens to be a common human trait. Seeing that there was QUITE a bit of surprise for Boston's "outing" of Ray to Sand on my dash actually surprised me.

From my lawyer friends, I learned about the following concept, and I just cracked the fuck up the first time I heard it, because it rang really true once I got my head around it: a lawyer friend once told me that when he started out at a typical major American law firm, his orientation included hearing a presentation from an older managing partner about the idea of the "equal opportunity asshole." Meaning: there's workplace harassment against protected classes, like race-based or sex-based harassment. But: can you get sued if you treat EVERYONE AROUND YOU like shit? And, he didn't mean on a personal level, not on an attacking level. Just on an abrupt, aggressive level. A bossy level. A very direct-toned level.

That kind of interaction -- an interaction with an equal opportunity asshole -- we know those kinds of people, right? These kinds of folks are...titchy. They might jump to conclusions. They're rooted in their worldview ONE HUNDRED PERCENT. They lack empathy. They make you feel unsettled. They are emotionally disconnected from you. They have NO interest in being emotionally connected WITH YOU.

When I dove into episode 5, I really thought I'd be writing about Boston as the equal opportunity asshole, and I think that this theory still holds to a great extent, but -- there's a but, a slight and fascinating-to-me but, that I'll get to in a second.

@ranchthoughts did the thing once more of covering EVERYTHING in her episode 5 ephemerality breakdown, so dear Ranch, I'm just gonna repeat some stuff you said in my own words, if you don't mind. First off, a couple of gushes:

1) That blind dining scene had me swooning. "Life is like a box of chocolates: you never know what you're gonna get," was what I was hearing when I was watching that. These lovely idiots are blind to what's happening in front of them, and what that means to them -- BUT THAT'S OKAY, BECAUSE THEY ARE YOUNG. YOUNG AND INEXPERIENCED. The blind dining metaphor, oh gawd -- using your senses to come to realizations about how you're truly feeling, and how to connect better with WHAT you're feeling? Slamming my hands on the table! BRILLIANT. Mew is SO clueless (OR IS HE?!?!??!).

1.5) And -- remember (all you young folks out there!). Youth is fleeting (cc the Ephemerality Squad). What we're watching of this cohort of "friends" is their building their bases of life experiences NOW, that will TEACH them how they will live more EXPERIENCED lives in their futures. Will their lives be better? Who the fuck knows. But their FUTURE LIVES will be shaped by what they're experiencing NOW.

2) Ranch nailed this already, but Sand is just as bad as Ray in living in the annals of time. (He's also naughty for another reason, which I'll get into in a postscript.) He's got the vintage tees, he wants to rewind to Woodstock, he's a fan of mostly classic Brit rock (....I will not call the Arctic Monkeys classic Brit rock, I will not, thus, "mostly," lol.) Dear friend @neuroticbookworm described this phenomenon of Sand's in the frame of Ray dabbling in a day of poverty tourism, as essentially what his day and night with Sand constituted. But I'd also add that Sand's living in a fantasy world of a couple levels to break the monotony of his everyday life. Those flashes of hope that he'll travel to world to festivals one day -- as he clocks 450 baht (around $12 USD) per bottle, as he sings, as he gets up and gets down -- yes, Ray is his fantasy, his non-existent 25th hour, Ray is the break from monotony that Sand needs as a thing to look forward too. Of course it comes crashing down.

3) But it'll come crashing down anyway, because I will posit the following: Sand's survival fantasies are necessary to keep him going by way of motivation, because Sand is going to be held back by others, and not just Ray. Sand is caught in a trap of filial piety. (OH SHIT! GIMME!) He's paying off his mom's debts.

We don't know how much the debts are. [We're seeing in Dangerous Romance that Sailom is getting his ass beat if he and his brother don't pay the debt collectors on time every month. Shit, the debt collectors are even trying to make Sailom an escort (which then turns into Kanghan buying off Sailom himself, but lemme leave that alone, WRONG SHOW)]. But even Sand's mom admits: Sand is solving a problem of MY OWN CREATION. How good is my son? He's a very good son. Drink up, honey.

Sand thought of Ray: wow, this guy might be into me, and shit, I'm into him. And I could use this right now! I could use this break. And that illusion came crashing down when Sand -- an intelligent dude! -- put two and two together real fast. And Sand, very rightly -- because he is FAST learning independence, in a totally different way than the main OF quartet -- pulls the hell away, and puts away the fantasy of Ray at Alone O'Clock.

3.5) I just want to note, real quick, that we now have TWO of my favorite-ist themes in this show: we have intergenerational trauma by way of Ray, and filial piety by way of Sand. THANK YOU, JOJO AND TEAM! *This* bitch is TRACKIN'.

4) Big ephemerality note here: I just, I SWOONED, GOD, I LOVED IT, WHEN RAY REVEALED HIS MOTHER WAS AN ACTRESS. And that she was bitter about getting pregnant and how that affected her career. Are you kidding me? JOJO. NINEW. ALL OF YOU. BRILLIANT. The ephemerality OF SHOWBIZ ITSELF.

Aren't all these actors risking their damn careers by potentially BLOWING UP THEIR SHIPS for the sake of this show? (I mean, that's actually a little far-fetched, as FirstKhao will be the first GMMTV pair to have an intercontinental fanmeet, BUT STILL.) God, the commentary on the FICKLENESS of showbiz was just CHEF'S KISS.

5) As Ranch noted, this was the episode where CHANNNNNGGGGEEEEE was the big bell ringing. Top needed something different than his sexual monotony -- so he goes after Mew, and shit, homes is bored AF. (@lurkingshan covered this perfectly here.) Mew contemplates changing for Top, the LASIK, the sex, all of it. Top seems to try a different kind of sex with Mew -- soft and romantic sex that ends with "I love you." Nick (oh, my bubby Nick), changes for Boston, becomes ripped, finds buttons and slacks. Boston contemplates whittling his list down. Ray wears secondhand (lol, it's called "vintage," asshole). Sand changes his routine to accommodate Ray.

And yet. I very, very often say in my posts that the process of behavioral change is INCREDIBLY difficult.

The five stages of behavioral change are: pre-contemplation, contemplation (Nick and the podcast), preparation, action (Nick at the gym), and maintenance.

The risk to this process, at any point in time, is: RELAPSE.

Think of how difficult it is to quit smoking. To go on a diet. To start an exercise routine. To stop biting your nails.

What is the thing that marks these processes more than anything else?

It's the RELAPSE into the old behavior, the old habits.

We really saw Boston trying to change...something. Trying to stick out...something with Nick. Trying on something new. Kinda like the way Ray tried on his secondhand shirt.

And then Boston experiences a familiar trigger: a trigger of jealousy when Mew calls him, innocently, to give Boston the heads-up that he's about ready to experience some cherry magic.

And that trigger, like all of our own triggers -- stress, a change of environment, a change of the people around you -- sent Boston back to a place.

Listen, I will, in no way, ever defend Boston's behavior. He was drunk and high AF, and he's generally toxic. Jojo is totally egging this on.

I would absolutely call Boston an equal opportunity asshole. He's only seeing the world from his own worldview, his own desires, his own desire to control whatever he can control around him.

But like I said before: toxicity is FAR more common that we'd like to believe. And toxicity within someone doesn't disappear very easily -- just like any of our habits, be they good or bad habits.

Boston was trying out a new life, for a few minutes (lol), of being a LITTLE LESS EPHEMERAL, a little less aloof -- a little less toxic. And a trigger brought him back to his bad place, and I think what we saw in that damn outburst was a relapse of the highest order.

Ray repeats to Nick what Top and Cheum have already said. This guy, Boston? He's nasty. Stay away. Boston's an asshole. Boston's still being stigmatized, and still living up to his label.

How would I summarize all of this? Throughout this ENTIRE episode, what was screaming within my head, as I said above, was: youth is fleeting. Youth itself is ephemeral. The experiences these young folks are going through at this moment in this show will build their experiences for how they will survive (or not) in their futures.

We may think that Boston, and Ray, and Mew, will not learn from their dumbass behavior, but -- they will. They will have no choice. Because their time being this young, and inexperienced, and idiotic, will flee. They'll graduate, and they will have to learn how to survive in a "real" world that may very well be far more brutal to them than their proximate friendships are to them right now. And man, if they have to experience lives that are MORE brutal than these proximate friendships they have, then good LUCK to them, because, well -- shit. It ain't pretty the way it is right now.

...

P.S. I just thought this whole scene was brilliant. Sand, honey, you're not as innocent as your meow feelings are letting on. I'm holding you accountable for what you're saying to Ray, too.

P.P.S. JENNIE.

(HAPPY SUNDAY, EPHEMERALITY SQUAD! @ranchthoughts @lurkingshan @neuroticbookworm @distant-screaming @slayerkitty @clara-maybe-ontheroad @twig-tea)

(HEY, SQUAD: if you tag me in things, and I forget to reblog, send me a DM! I'm on the last stages of this moving chapter of my life, and I don't wanna miss your meta!)

[piratecaptainscaptainpirates]

if you're still taking prompts for the 1k fic thing, I'd love to see a little scene about the first time stede comforts ed after a nightmare 🥺

Ahh this is so soft!! (And yeah, I'm still taking prompts for 1k word fics!)

--

Stede was a bit surprised when he blinked awake to the darkness of their bedroom.

After a lifetime at sea, Ed’s body was used to rising with the dawn. Usually, Ed started shifting with the sun, and his movements stirred Stede, and they were able to wake up together as the early-morning light turned their bedroom pink.

Stede wasn’t sure at first what had woken him up -

Ed’s elbow was nudging him in the ribs, the movement jerky and twitchy.

“Ed?” Frowning, Stede started to sit up, and when the only noise he got in response was a quiet whimper, he hurried to light the lamp on the nightstand.

Ed was still asleep, but it obviously wasn’t peaceful. His body was jerking slightly, his arms kept trying to pull up - like he was trying to raise them to protect himself, Stede realized. His face was twisted with fear, his cheeks were wet, and he kept muttering half-formed sentences, a string of “no” and “don’t” and “please” and “stop.”

Were you supposed to wake people up from a nightmare? Stede thought he’d read once that was dangerous - or was that seizures?

Then Ed made another miserable little whimpering sound, and that made up Stede’s mind for him.

He took one of Ed’s hands and placed his other palm over Ed’s chest, trying to wake him as gently as possible. As much as his brain was screaming at him to bang on Ed’s chest, he didn’t want to scare Ed further by waking him up so harshly.

Ed gasped at Stede’s touch, darting up to a half-sitting position before his eyes were even fully open. His face was nakedly panicked, and when his eyelids opened his eyes were wide and filled with tears, searching Stede’s face wildly.

Recognition hit him belatedly, and Ed crumpled back against the pillows with a ragged sigh.

“Hi,” Stede said quietly. “Are you -”

He was cut off by Ed pracally launching forward into his arms, clenching Stede’s nightshirt in his fingers. Stede wrapped his arms around him on instinct, letting Ed hide his face in the crook of his neck.

“It’s alright,” he whispered. “You’re safe. Did you have a bad dream?”

Ed’s nod was soft and tentative.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Ed’s silence was answer enough, and Stede just sighed, resting his cheek against Ed’s forehead. “It’s alright. You don’t have to.”

“I’m sorry I woke you up,” Ed whispered, his voice coming out quiet and reedy.

“Not your fault,” Stede soothed. “I’m glad I was able to help.”

Ed pulled back, scrubbing at his wet cheeks with the back of his hand. “Thank you.”

He looked much calmer already, and although Stede’s heart clenched at the nervous, jittery quality to his movements, it was a far cry from how panicked and afraid he’d looked when he first woke up. It didn’t look like he’d be able to get back to sleep any time soon, though, with how anxious he still looked…

Stede couldn’t help but smile as the idea hit him, and he patted Ed’s knee. “I’ll be right back.”

Ed’s eyes widened. “Please don’t leave me.”

So Stede held out his hand, and he let Ed tuck himself into his side, wrapping a robe around him before leading him to their kitchen to grab the things he needed. Ed didn’t comment as he gathered a couple brooms, both their mops, and some rope, but he got it when Stede started securing the brooms to their bedposts.

“Babe, you’re such a fucking genius,” he groaned, his own tentative smile spreading across his face as he grabbed the quilt tossed over the chair in the corner.

With the brooms and mops secured to the bedposts, they could throw the blanket over them to make their bed into a pretty damn good blanket fort.

“There,” Stede said, satisfied with their work as he lifted the blanket for Ed to crawl inside. It felt safe and secluded, like nothing could get them.

The change in Ed’s body language was a relief. In the darkness of their fort, Stede could only really see the whites of his eyes, but he could feel the crinkle at the corners of his eyes as he smiled, and he could feel the loose-limbed comfort in Ed’s body as he pulled him close.

“Never had anyone do something like this for me before,” Ed admitted quietly.

That was a damned shame, and one Stede intended to try his best to remedy for the rest of their lives.

Ed’s head rested on Stede’s shoulder, and Stede ran his fingers through his hair, humming in contentment as Ed relaxed against him.

“My daughter used to have terrible nightmares,” Stede said. “I used to tell her stories. To help her get back to sleep.”

Ed was so quiet, Stede briefly wondered if he was already asleep.

“Your boyfriend has terrible nightmares,” Ed said, then, very quiet, almost embarrassed. “Maybe you could tell him a story? If you want?”

“Of course.” Stede hoped they’d get to a point, one day, where Ed wouldn’t have to feel embarrassed to ask for comfort. He’d always told Alma the same story, when she was little, and he began quite on autopilot. “There once was a princess named…Ed.”

Ed snorted, and Stede could feel his smile against his skin as he turned his neck to kiss over Stede’s collarbone. “Princess, huh? Is he a pretty princess?”

“The prettiest,” Stede said earnestly. “And this is the story of how Princess Ed saved his entire kingdom by…fishing up the giant monster fish that lived in the sea!”

“Wow,” Ed hummed appreciatively. “Did he have any help? Reckon he couldn’t have gotten far without his boyfriend.”

“Oh, yes,” Stede said. “They helped each other the whole way.”

Ed was asleep well before he could finish the story, but Stede stayed awake for a while after that, just holding his boyfriend in his arms and wondering how he got to be so lucky.

[xxsycamore]

𝘏𝘢𝘭𝘧 𝘠𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘓𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘈𝘯𝘥 𝘏𝘢𝘭𝘧 𝘖𝘧 𝘔𝘪𝘯𝘦. . . GILBERT X GN!READER

►"Hey Gilbert, today is about doing things for each other, right? Is there something you want from me?"

Gilbert x Gender Neutral Reader • rating: G • wordcount: 986 • tags: fluff; holding hands; dates; Valentine's Day • masterlist

a/n: Happy Valentine's day! This fic was meant to happen waaay earlier, but where I am it only snowed properly like last week, which was the needed boost for finishing this. Now it gets to be a Valentine's Day fic! Prompts used are "I said that I'd teach you how to ice skate, I didn't say that I know how to ice skate." (#6, fluff list, 'Tis the Season of Love by me and @voltage-vixen ) and "Are those hearts in your eyes that I'm seeing?" (#9, Be My Valentine CCC 2.0 by me and @chaosangel767).

I really just want to see Gilbert having fun in the snow. Hope you enjoy ❤

The temperatures dropped drastically the night before your date with Gilbert.

The soft crunching of snow under your feet is surprisingly welcomed today, and the weather is not cruel enough to take from your excitement.

Gilbert hums an unfamiliar tune as he walks by your side, your hands separated by two thick layers of glove but clasped together all the same. The way his fingers would be freezing to the touch when without a glove to protect them from the cold, you can't demand for feeling his skin on yours. Not because it's not pleasant, no, you just want him to be as warm as possible, at least while under your watch.

The carriage is far behind your backs now, and even if Gilbert took something with him upon your departure, you still suspect this might turn out to be just a nice walk, after all. And if that's the case, then surely a nice walk it is - hills upon hills of snow-covered evergreens outstretch in the distance, and you feel tiny where you stand, alone with Gilbert. The way he always carries himself in tar black from head to toe, you'll never lose sight of him even if you were to let go of his hand. Not that you have such intentions.

Tiny snowflakes fall from the sky, so tiny that they remind you of specks of dust dancing in an ancient library. The sky is bright too; a second more and the snowflakes will completely cease to fall, maybe even the sun would peek behind a cloud to see where your mysterious date leads to. You're just as curious. And as Gilbert remains unusually quiet still, you're closer and closer to begging him to spoil the surprise.

You are too concentrated on the man by your side and his adorable little swinging of your joined hands, to notice the change of scenery.

"I didn't know there was a lake here. I haven't explored much, haha…"

"The books were more interesting?" Gilbert tilts his head, giving your hand a soft squeeze. Without waiting for a reply, he lets go and takes a step ahead on his own, at the very edge of the frozen lake. His cane comes in contact with the glassy surface, and Gilbert gives it a good tap or two, as if testing its thickness. "This should be fine."

You're puzzled and with a couple of questions on the tip of your tongue, none of which matter when you're with Gilbert. You're sure you'll see in due time, as you're not left hanging along with the invisible question marks in the air for long. You skip your way to the nearby log that Gilbert pointed towards, hurrying to join his side.

He has you seated down on the log. The bag he's been carrying since earlier is introduced in the scene again and this time you get to see the contents. It's ice skates.

"Oh- Oh, I can totally put them on on my own-"

You find your leg gripped tightly by Gilbert's now ungloved hands, not giving you the chance to pry it from his grasp if you wanted to.

"Now, won't you be a good bunny and sit still while I spare you the effort? I thought today we're meant to do things for each other."

Ah. It's Valentine's Day, after all. You can't deny that. And he's already doing so much…

Getting onto the ice with him is more fun that it is stressful, you discover. You share that you have no experience with this, and he gives you that sweet smile. Promises to teach you all you need to know.

You think you must have some kind of influence on him in that moment, because his movements are just as wobbly as yours. He laughs it off; strengthens his grip on you wherever his hands fall on your body. You're determined and try to watch your feet more than his pretty face, it's hard but you do. You're looking forward to be praised for maintaining balance.

"Gilbert…? Are you sure you know how to do this?"

"I said that I'd teach you how to ice skate, I didn't say that I know how to ice skate."

You've had a handful of chances already to realize this, yet you denied until hearing it from his mouth. It shouldn't surprise you that much, but it does, and it shouldn’t throw you off-balance when you've never actually relied on him for balance, but it does.

How you both get off the ice without failing is beyond you. If Gilbert wasn't laughing merrily right now, you wouldn't be either.

"Hey Gilbert, today is about doing things for each other, right? Is there something you want from me?"

Gilbert's laughter fades to a smirk holding the aftertaste of it, but more sinister somehow. The way he grips your chin lacks the familiar cool feeling of his naked fingers, but you can imagine it just fine. You wonder just when you fell inlove with the feeling of his cold fingers.

"Are those hearts in your eyes that I'm seeing? Very well… We're all alone here. I wonder what I should do with you, little bunny."

You desperately want him to take something from you, in exchange for the mess of emotions he put inside you. It's not fair, he should feel loved too.

"I think we have time to learn. It was fun, and now I want to take you to skate on top of every lake Rhodolite has to offer. We need to be quick, or the spring will arrive."

You nod enthusiastically, recalling how well you kept your balance earlier, even if for a couple of seconds at best. But he doesn't let go of your chin at that.

"As for now… You can help me discover what our snow angel would look like, if we are on top of each other!"

Taglist: @arsnovacadenza @ale-teodora @kimi00twin @otomelady @privilegedpancake @g-kleran    @pumpumnnnp @thesirenwashere @ravenarld @kimmy-banana @devonares @animeworldsposts @galaxyprison @sadshaxk @starshards26 @acethephoenix256 @ikevamp-shrine-2 @nad-zeta @crystal13unny @keen19thcenturygoatsstudent @lordsister @ikemen-banshou   @themysticalbeing @canaria-blackwell @otome-scribbles @rhodolitesrose @coornn @kpop-and-otome @queen-dahlia @kisara-16 @chaosangel767 @ikemenlibrary @queengiuliettafirstlady @aurora-morning @aquagirl1978 ​ @ikemenlover24 @violettduchess @mcofthemansion @tiny-wooden-robot @joy-the-reader @katriniac @ikemen-writer @gilbertvonobsidian @atelieredux @tele86 Let me know if you want to be tagged/untagged!

[akhmatowa]

Hey, I saw your good omens posts and I just wanted to say that I agree with you so much!

I first watched good omens when season 2 was already out, and thought Beelzebub x Gabriel was cute, but the more I thought about it the less I liked it. The whole personality shift in both characters (especially Beelzebub) was kind of jarring and the relationship just not developed enough to be convincing, especially with only the few scenes in s2e6 in my opinion at least.

I personally prefer season 1 Beelzebub. I also missed the buzzing in their voice in season 2 and since that doesn't have to be actor related, it bothers me a lot even if its only a very small thing.

And you are one of the only ones I saw pointing out, that of all demons present in the bookshop Dagon, who was shown to shadow Beelzebub at many instances in season 1 and with that could have picked up on how to do a lot of the required work, should be the one being promoted, rather than Shax, which felt rather random and unearned. Realistically a Duke should become prince, right? Are there even more Dukes than just Hastur, as Ligur is dead and Dagon is under-duke? Are there more princes? The hierarchy in hell is even more confusing than the one in heaven.

I hope this little rant was okay and that you have a great week!

I LOVE ranting. Cannot overstate just how pro-ranting I am. (And thanks, I hope you have a wonderful week too <3)

I know my opinion on B/G couldn't not be influenced by the stew I'd been cooking in for 4 years, so it's very surprising to see a new fan sharing that perspective. The majority of responses I've seen so far is "I never really thought about them before but I guess they're kinda cute"... which, I guess, is fitting if you've never cared about the characters on their own and not as a ship.

And in order for that ship to happen they've changed Beelzebub so much I am still seething about it over a month later. What happened to my terrifying, buzzing, demanding respect, take-no-shit demon? Why did the new face come with completely different mannerisms, completely different behaviour, even completely different speech patterns? S1 Beelz spoke very commandingly, used very few words because they knew everyone would listen to them the first time. One side-eye was enough to shut the unneeded comments down! And I'm supposed to believe that the very same demon would become so jittery and chatty in just a couple of years? It's not that they were anxious about Gabriel, it's not like that's the first time something's ever gone wrong in their life. They say "love" changes people - and I could probably believe that if we've seen them less tense, more pensive, perhaps, but not this!!!

And the buzzing was such a great character touch - a very clever little blink-and-miss it detail that still gave a lot of insight to their character. What was the point in removing it!!! I refuse to believe that the new actress couldn't pronounce words with "z" from time to time!!!

As for the whole mess that's the bookshop scene: not only did they change Beelz completely, but they also really dumbed them down and made them seem so much more uncaring than they used to be. I'm sure I've already made that post, but they still cared at least somewhat about Hell before; and then seeing Gabriel knocked their brains out to the point of causing a political crisis there without a second thought. Watching them appoint their successor felt like "eenie meenie let it be you idc". The but about other Princes is so right - except Neil had Aziraphale guess Crowley's new name as Asmodeus, so... I guess he decided to keep them just as works of humans' imagination.

I can only hope that in S3 demons get some common sense and rebel against everything that's happened. (Although, given how low Neil's opinion of them is, I doubt it lol)

[lihikainanea]

I know you have had a little writers block and not much time to write but in case this can inspire more tiger and Bill hear goes. So Bill is working on a movie that is a mess. He took the job because because he really loved the director, but lets so with rewrites and other politics that director quit. Bill was still in a contracted he could not easily get out out and he did not want to quit something he had already put work into.

Filming finally started back up with a new script and he was doing his best to make his character believable. But his neppo-baby co-star was not helping. Of course he was also considered a neppo-baby by the US press but he did not think he was not a brat like this woman. She wanted to change things in the script. She wanted special foods and no one could talk to her unless she was officially on set. He could not even get her to go over lines or how he could respectfully touch her during scenes since they were playing a couple.

He of course talked though things with Tiger as much as he thought he could but this was a very tough shoot. He would come home late and only get about 6 hours before having to be back on set.

His mind is wheeling one night when he has to do a love scene with this awful girl the next day. Tiger calms him enough for him to fall asleep. His brain has other ideas to fix the thoughts he has about the next day. He dreams of actually having an affair with awful girl. And the sex is just....he wakes in cold sweat. He was moaning in his sleep and he can not even look at Tiger. And boy does he not want to go to work that day either.

Ohhhhh I like this.

Look, I mean, with how many films actors do--every once in awhile, they must work with fellow castmates that they just hate. Abhor. Their hatred is so thinly veiled that it's incredibly palpable to the crew onset, but thankfully things rarely ever make it to the press because of NDAs and big ass scary lawyers and the like. But every once in awhile--we, the ever little-seeing public--we get wind of it. Think Don't Worry Darling. The drama surrounding that production, for the so many reasons it seems to entail, was just--unf, chef kiss to those of us that still love the thrill of a little celebrity drama.

And I'm sure Bill, in all of his perfectionist nature, was also hated on a few sets. His perfectionist nature. His insistence on trying the scene 100 different ways, for 100 different takes, until he was satisfied. Not everyone performs to that calibre nor do they hold themselves accountable to such lofty expectations as that big swedish talking tree, but that's just who he is. That's how he works.

But y'know, I'd even venture to say that it's quite rare that Bill actually likes his castmates and fellows actors he works with. That's not to say that he hates their guts--not at all. But rather he's just pretty...ambivalent about the whole thing. Neutral. He's the Switzerland of film sets. He's a pretty private person in general, a pretty guarded individual, and for him this is a job. Onscreen chemistry is far more important than actual chemistry in this line of work, and he's able to separate the two. He can have great onscreen chemistry with someone that he's not super friendly with, and he doesn't feel any inclination to add the to the inner workings of his closest social circle. Beers after a long day on set is one thing, the occasional celebratory dinner, gifts for the make up and costume crew. Getting to know everyone on a first name basis. But beyond that, Bill is more than happy to go back to his trailer between takes, or go back to his apartment at the end of the day, and cook dinner with tiger or have drinks with some of his friends who flew out to spend a few days with him.

And on that note, he's probably had to work with a lot of actors that he really doesn't like. People who either take themselves way too seriously (Bill thinks method acting is the most ridiculous fucking thing anyone could ever do), or the opposite--people who don't take this seriously at all. And if you call Bill a nepo baby to his face you'll likely be tackled violently from stage left by tiger--but it's also why he's ultra sensitive about those nepo baby actors who don't have any talent, and don't even have the work ethic to build it up.

It's still like pulling teeth to get Bill to admit that his laast name opened up a few doors for him, but he'll also be the first to admit that his initial acting jobs weren't....uh, they weren't great. But he worked at it, he honed his craft, he worked his ass off, and now nobody can say the opportunities he's gotten have been handed to him.

But y'know, the thought of nepotism--well, it doesn't really bother some people.

And maybe on a recent film set, Bill is living in his version of hell. His love interest in the film is a girl in her young to mid-twenties, the type who grew up with two famous parents and all of a sudden decided she wanted to act--so roles were handed to her. Bill's not quite sure how she even got the job given how their chemistry read went, with Bill nearly glaring daggers at her the whole time. She's just the type of person he can't stand. She's loud about everything. She comes with an entourage to everything. It's always over the top, all the time. She never learns her lines. She doesn't give him anything to work with in a scene, reciting her lines like a robot and not leaving anything to improv, natural reactions. She needs a million takes for one scene--not because she's a perfectionist--but because she forgot her lines, or didn't listen to the notes the director gave her. Bill is pretty convinced this entire film could have shot in half the time if she'd just be a little bit of a fucking professional about it.

The whole thing irks him at first, then just pisses him right the hell off shortly after. She's late for the call time, when the other actors are sitting in the transport car well before the ass crack of dawn waiting for her to come out her house. She comes into the makeup trailer blasting her music and yelling along with her entourage, while Bill is reviewing his scene changes and trying to get his head into his character for the day--they knock over his coffee, get in everyone's way, and just never shut the fuck up. Her friends--and her--are all filming all the time, and Bill spends most of his time between takes trying to dodge ending up on someone's instagram or tiktok.

But y'know, it's just so pitifully ironic that the only scene this girl is keen to rehearse--a little too keen, actually--are any of the kissing scenes, or the sex scenes. And with one scheduled in just a few days time, this little nepo baby has been all over Bill trying to find proper times--evenings, of course, with a little wine to loosen up--for them to uh, practice. Bill's gag reflex has been barely contained.

And like, tiger bears the brunt of his rants at the end of every filming day. Whether it's 2AM or 2AM or anywhere in between, he always FaceTimes her when he wraps the day and tiger always thinks that vein in his neck is real damn close to bursting.

"She just...she doesn't get it tiger," he rants, pausing to take a drag of his cigarette, "This is a fucking joke to her. This is my job, my profession, and it's a fucking joke to her."

"Has anyone told her?" she asks, "Maybe she needs to be called out on it."

"Her dad's studio is partially funding this one," Bill exhales, the camera shaking as he continues to walk.

"You're fucked then," tiger smiles sadly. Bill just makes a frustrated noise before continuing to rant for the next hour.

And like, maybe tiger goes to visit him on set right? And she's not it before, the whole rehearsing an upcoming steamy scene with him--but wait wait, I'm getting ahead of myself here.

So, tiger visits him on set and sees firsthand what a fucking nightmare this girl is. Tiger spends most of her time in his trailer but somehow, she still has to dodge what feels like a million cameras all linked to a hundred different kinds of social media, all from her entourage. They ain't shy about questions that are none of their damn business either--shit like who she is, how she knows Bill, what she's doing there.

"I'm his bodyguard," she cracks, except tiger is kind of scary when she's pissed off and she's not really blinking so suddenly the gaggle of girls don't really know what to think.

In any case, tiger can definitely see why Bill has been so pissed off lately. Everything is a joke to this girl, she doesn't take anything seriously, and suddenly she's just real excited about the scenes coming up in a few days.

"We should practice tonight!" she says gleefully, as both her and Bill are sitting in the makeup trailer getting all un-done after the day. Tiger quirks a brow from the back of the room where she's playing with one of the other actor's dogs.

"No thanks," Bill says immediately.

"You can come by, I'll get some wine, we can loosen up."

"No," he says again.

"We need to rehearse," she continues, "We need to practice."

"I've had enough practice."

And thankfully one of the make up artists--tiger makes a note to give her a big hug after--one of the make up artists sees every single hair on Bill's neck stand up.

"Bill, sorry--can you stop talking? It's getting the make up caught in the creases and making it hard to remove," she says kindly. Bill gives her a wide smile.

"Sure, sorry," he says softly.

And that's the end of that.

But like, look. It's plain as day. Bill is chainsmoking. He didn't sleep that night, he just rants and rants at how repulsed he is, and how much he's dreading the next 1.5 weeks worth of scenes. Tiger does her best to distract him--keeps his whisky glass full, hell she even gets him in the sauna and sucks his soul out from his dick just to try and get his mind off it. But the sun rises the next morning as much as we sometimes wish it wouldn't, and Bill has to go to work.

I'll be waiting for you in your trailer bud," tiger says reassuringly, "Remember, you can take as many breaks as you need."

But y'know, here's the thing. Bill is getting through it, because he's a goddamned professional. Is he having fun? No. Does he hate every second of it? Yes. But it's not that. It doesn't take him long to figure out that this girl...she's purposely fucking up the scenes, just so they have to do them again. And again. And again. The scene where he has to push her up again a wall, rip her shirt open, and kiss the hell out of her? Somehow, that scene took the entire day to shoot. 57 takes.

The actual sex scene, him on top of her, both of them wearing nothing but tiny little pasties? Somehow, that took two entire days to shoot. More than 100 takes.

On any set that Bill has been on, things like that could usually be shot in anywhere from 4-6 takes--maybe half a day, depending on lighting and equipment needs.

Bill was livid. He drew the line initially and demanded a closed set, after she brought her entire entourage to watch that day. It took a lot of negotiating, but Bill wasn't budging on it.

And every single day that Bill went to set and have to film that, when he'd get home--man, he took it out on tiger. The poor girl was ravaged. Bill just needed her, needed to completely wreck her, just to get the taste and feel and everything of that other pain in the ass as far away from him as possible.

But y'know, Bill's mind is a cruel place.

And maybe its triggered by something small. He has a long day on set so tiger goes shopping, and when he comes back to his rented apartment she has some stuff strewn everywhere and Bill spots a shirt on the bed. His blood boils.

"What the fuck is this?" he marches over to it, holding it up.

"It's....my new shirt?" tiger says cautiously, "I thought it was cute."

"Get rid of it tiger," he snaps. He grabs his lighter from his pocket, flicking it open and holding it to the shirt.

"Okay whoa," tiger jumps, grabbing the shirt from him, "Easy bud. What's going on."

"She has this shirt," he seethes, "I don't ever want to see it on you."

"Ah," tiger says, "Right. You won't see it again bud."

"Promise?" he puts the lighter away.

"Promise.

But it's enough to just...kickstart some part of Bill's brain that should have stayed dormant. And that night, he drifts off to sleep with tiger in his arms and his thumb in her mouth--except he dreams of her. And it's ~spicy~. A stupid ass, unreasonable sex dream that felt really good. Amazing sex, actually, and from the noises he was making tiger wasn't sure if he was in pain or having the time of his life but the piece of plywood digging in to her back gave her a small inclination.

That is, until he woke up and all but shoved her away with enough force that she almost went tumbling off the bed.

"Bill!" she shrieked, but he was already scratching at his skin and lightly smacking his own face.

"No no no no no," he muttered, "No no no god fuck no."

"Bud?"

His eyes snap to hers and they're wild, pupils huge, his hair sticking up all over the place and his chest heaving.

"You," he says, out of breath, "Here. Now."

"What--"

"Now."

And tiger doesn't have time to do anything before two long arms wrap around her waist and haul her up with force, slamming her into his chest.

"Fuck me," he growls into her neck.

"What?" tiger's still trying to get her wits about her because a second ago she was asleep and comfy and now this wild ass enraged beast has his hands all over her and she can't quite keep up.

A hard spank lands on her ass and she squeals a little, but then he has his fist balled in her hair and his teeth biting at her neck.

"Fuck me," he growls again, "Fuck me into next fucking week."

"Bill, what the hell is going--"

But then suddenly she's in the air, and then she's pinned under his body as he looms--big and scary and totally wild--above her.

"Tiger, I just had a dream about her," he snaps, "And now you need to get it the fuck out of my head so that I never have to see it again. So I'm only going to ask you one more time."

He yanks her head back, licking up her neck before biting down hard on her earlobe. His other hand cups her harshly through her panties and she gasps.

"Fuck me," he growls.

Tiger is all too happy to oblige.

[wickedlittleoz]

Hello! Would it be okay to request Shimadacest somnophilia? :3 Whoever you choose to be the one awake trying to keep quiet maybe and failing so hard, in the end the sleeping one got woken up and then they ride into the sunrise like a happy married couple 🏇☀️

Only if you're comfortable with that theme ofc!!! Thank you! 💞💞

HI ANON <3

sooo in truth somnophilia isn't something i normally gravitate towards/enjoy, but what you described sounded so fun and it's actually very similar to a scene i wrote for jealous, brother? so this might not be super hardcore but i didn't wanna say no to such a kind & respectful request <3 and because i'd already written one with genji trying and failing to stay quiet, hanzo is up for torture the task this time~ i do hope you enjoy it even if it isn't exactly what you had in mind.

thanks for reaching out and please do send more ideas whenever! take care!! <3

this takes place before genji's death. E-rated.

-

It's late.

Well, later than usual for Hanzo, whose sleeping habits haven't been decent since father's death. Sojiro made the clan work look easy, the way he had everything under control at all times. Hanzo is learning that keeping it such takes more hours than a day can suffice.

Though there's got to be a limit, he thinks as he shuts down the computer. Pushes up from the chair, stretches; he's too young to have crackly joints, but alas, more time in the office means less time for training and keeping his health in check.

As he exits the room, he unlocks his phone to a dozen messages from Genji. The last one, from about an hour ago, is a picture of himself in front of a mirror. He has a leg propped up on the wall behind it, off frame, so that Hanzo can see the handle of some... toy that's buried in his ass, while his cock is also in the reflection, and it's hard. The caption reads waitin 4 u.

Hanzo sighs as the picture slowly burns into his brain, where it'll most likely remain forever. He really should pay more attention to his phone, shouldn't he.

Well, he turns on his heels and instead of going to his bedroom, he heads towards Genji's. Better late than never is at the tip of his tongue, but when he knocks and steps inside, he finds his brother fast asleep. He looks adorable, a scatter of sex toys around him on the bed, most likely from when he was digging through them, picking which one to tease Hanzo with. Soft and peaceful, and so very handsome, fully naked still.

Hanzo's cock, which had already been incited by the picture, pulses in his pants at the sight. But it's late, very late, and Genji stayed up waiting for him at least until an hour ago, so there is no excuse to wake him up again.

A bitter flavor coats his tongue as he wonders how awful it would be, or how much Genji would hate him if he sat here and touched himself. Something tells him Genji wouldn't hate him at all – in fact, his promiscuous little brother would probably like to know that even when he isn't trying he can affect Hanzo in such away. And Hanzo wonders if that something isn't just his dick, but he's too tired and too worked up to care.

He locks the door and falls onto Genji's bean bag. From this angle he has a gorgeous view of Genji's hole, still loose from when he had the toy inside, and Hanzo can think back to that picture and imagine that it was his cock stretching Genji to this state. Drool threatens to spill down the corner of his mouth at the thought; he can almost taste Genji from memory alone, so long he has spent licking over every inch of his body.

He feels himself sagging into the seat as he begins to jerk himself, relaxing at last after a long day of work. Sure, he wishes these were Genji's hands, or his mouth or his ass, but the smell and the sight of him will do for now. Little breathy moans escape him and Hanzo bites his lips; he has never really been a loud one, but there's something different in the thrill of having to be quiet. Genji stirs, but doesn't wake, and he sighs.

This bedroom evokes so many memories of time spent here, not as kids, but in this new era of their lives. The one where Hanzo comes to Genji for sex as well as everything else, and vice-versa. Drunk nights and sober nights, angry nights and soft nights, laughter and moans and crying and shouting. They've done it all. And flashes of such moments cross his mind, building on his pleasure, on thoughts of how perfect Genji is and how he wishes the whole world could see it, see Genji, see them.

Hanzo comes with a choked groan, gaze snapping upwards the ceiling, his mouth frozen around the sound that he tries to swallow, but can't manage. He fully melts into the bean bag, throwing his head back and just breathing. He could sleep here, he thinks; he shouldn't, but he could. He feels so relaxed. He can't believe he did something as disgusting as jerking off to Genji when he's asleep and unaware, and somehow it felt so good.

Fuck; he thinks he says that out loud. When he finally shuffles to his feet and starts tucking himself in, his eyes slide over to the bed and-

"Was that good for you?" Genji asks. He's turned onto his back now and his face is still marked from sleep, eyes barely open, but he offers that lewd smile that got them into this mess of a relationship, years ago.

Hanzo freezes in place for a second, caught red-handed, but Genji just laughs. "Come here. I've been waiting for you all night."

He reaches out a hand and Hanzo has no choice but to take it, kneeling onto the mattress and shuffling closer to Genji's body.

"You're wearing too much," Genji complains in murmurs, fingers quick to undo the buttons on Hanzo's waistcoat, then his shirt, shoving it all off his body. Hanzo lets him, always does anyways, but for now his mind is foggy with exhaustion and an orgasm and downright guilt. That is, until Genji takes his chin and pulls him into a kiss.

"You're doing it again," he whispers into Hanzo's mouth and Hanzo knows exactly what he means; Genji always says that he gets too much in his own head sometimes, overthinking even the most inconsequential things. He sighs and almost starts an apology, but Genji kisses him again.

Then it's easy to move onto Genji's body, to awkwardly shove down his pants until they're both fully naked and he fits between Genji's parted legs like he belongs there – which he does. It's easy to kiss down his throat and clavicles, and taste the skin that he'd wished so badly to touch mere minutes ago.

"What took you so long?" His voice is a whine or a moan, or something in-between, as Genji rakes his nails up Hanzo's back.

"Work."

"You work too much," the usual complaint. "That was so sexy, Hanzo..."

Now, that second part is unexpected. He pulls back only enough to find Genji's eyes.

"What was?" He asks, frowning.

"That you were touching yourself right there, at the foot of the bed," he breathes and his hands are suddenly all over Hanzo's shoulders, chest, face. "Were you thinking of me?"

Hanzo's cheeks are burning before Genji is even finished with the question. The things Genji feels comfortable saying are so wild to him. But they can talk to each other like that, when no one's listening.

"Who else could I think about?" He clears his throat, blush deepening as he forces himself to add, "After, um. That picture."

Genji chuckles softly and never in Hanzo's whole life has he seen anyone, anything prettier. "You liked that?"

He just nods, so Genji, something cheeky and proud in his eyes, adds, "Got that toy after the first time we slept together and for weeks I thought you'd never look me in the eye again. It's exactly the same size as you."

Hanzo doesn't know quite how to react to all that information; the memory of their first time and the period afterwards is bittersweet enough. He'd felt so guilty, falling into physical desire for his own brother, that he'd avoided Genji for days, until he couldn't anymore – sure, he could ignore Genji's presence, but it's impossible to run away from his own thoughts and his own feelings, and everything in him ached for his brother.

But to know that Genji procured a dildo that would match his cock, specifically so he could pretend that he had Hanzo when he didn't... He feels dizzy with how fast blood rushes down to his dick, and Hanzo doesn't think much anymore, just pushes one of Genji's knees to the side and slides right into him. He fits right in.

Their gazes still locked, he gets to watch as flames rise in Genji's eyes, as pleasure makes his brows twitch. He smiles, heaving warmly against Hanzo's mouth. "Nothing like the real you, brother," is a whisper and probably the most honest thing Genji has said all night.

Hanzo feels himself losing control of his thoughts; Genji always knows what to say or do to get him to this point. He presses his mouth to Genji's as his hips pull back, only to slam back in. Moans lost in their throats as he refuses to let the kiss end, hitting home with each thrust. Genji's legs wrap around his waist, heels digging into Hanzo's lower back like he wants more.

More?

He pulls back and off Genji, who stares at him in confusion. "On your hands and knees," he says darkly and immediately a grin spreads on Genji's face, who takes no time at all following Hanzo's order. Offering himself like a treat, even reaching back with one hand to pull his cheeks apart. Hanzo grabs his wrist, pressing only hard enough until he hears a moan, then directs Genji's hand to his own cock. "Touch yourself," he tells him and once again Genji obeys, and when Hanzo pushes into him again he grabs a handful of green hair and tugs.

Is that good enough, he wants to ask, but doesn't manage because Genji cries out, probably loud enough to wake up half the house. He groans, too, can't hold it in anymore. Pulling at Genji's hair to the side so he can see how his face twists in pleasure, how he sniffles between moans, how his lips tremble when he begs, "Harder, Hanzo, harder!"

Hanzo would give him the world when he asks like that. He tugs harder at Genji's hair and pushes his hips faster, to begin.

Genji comes first, with all the stimulation, toppling on the bed. Hanzo lets his hips down gently, flips him over; he lays on his back, legs spread wide, mouth hanging open for when Hanzo looms over him and together they jerk him to completion. He tries to aim at Genji's mouth, but it gets all over, and they laugh in breathy chuckles.

He sits back and just breathes for a moment. All things considered, Hanzo thinks himself a very lucky man.

Once he finds some strength in his legs, he gets up and heads to Genji's en suite, returning a moment later with a damp towel to clean up his brother. His eyes flick to the window; outside, the sun is beginning to rise.

"Sorry I kept you up all night," he says as he gently wipes sweat and cum off most crevices of Genji's body. He means it. This is his life, not Genji's; his brother gets to be spared of this awful legacy that was put onto Hanzo's shoulders.

"Do it again whenever," is almost a demand as Genji tugs the towel from Hanzo's hand, tossing it aside and pulling him down to the mattress.

Hanzo hugs his waist and lets Genji rest on his chest. He has to get the new day started soon; there are meetings to attend to and sales to be made. But that's a problem for future Hanzo. For now, he rests with his whole world right here in his arms.

[cursedvibes]

Kusakabe for the character ask! (I personally don’t like him lol but am interested in hearing your thoughts!)

Hah, I can understand why you feel that way, I think Gege isn't doing him any favours lately

favourite thing about them

I didn't pay much attention to him in Shibuya, he was just kinda there, but I did come to like him a bit more when we learned more about him at the beginning of the Culling Game. Honestly, when we focus more on him as a person, his bonds and convictions, I quite like him. Unfortunately, we don't really get much of that for the most part. For example, I love his interactions with Yaga and I'd like to know more about his sister. His thoughts about why he fights shortly before Sukuna knocked him out were quite touching too and honestly were more meaningful and did more for his character than Mei Mei, Nanami and Gojo explaining his character to us. Nice that they think he's a good person, but do they even know him? I'm not sure we've ever seen him interact with Nanami or Gojo. Nothing on all three that would make me believe he's anything more personal than a colleague. I would've loved to hear from Miwa, Yaga or his sister in their place. Y'know, the people who he actually thought of when gathering his courage to fight Sukuna. So I like that side of him, the rest is...eh difficult.

least favourite thing about them

He gets used way too much for exposition. It's basically his only role since he met up with the students. You don't really get much of his character in these instances because he's too busy being a mouthpiece for Gege infodumping on us. Also, I get he's bad at expressing his emotions, but I really don't like how he looks down on and berates Yuuji and Maki at times for example. He knows they need their strength and appreciates them for that, but also calls them stupid because Gojo failed to teach them something. He does care about all students in a broader sense (Miwa is clearly his favourite though), but I still get the strong impression that he sees Yuuji as merely Sukuna's vessel.

favourite line

"He isn't even here anymore. I guess it's precisely because he isn't here anymore...A dead man won't be saying much. All I can do is think of what he would say to me were he alive. I doubt he'd get on to me if I avoided putting my life on the line and didn't fight. He wouldn't stop me from seeing my little sister and Takeru, either. He might look a little sad though...not because I didn't put my life on the line, but because he and I wouldn't be able to fight at each other's side."

brOTP

Hm, idk he doesn't seem to have many people he's that chummy with. Mei Mei, I guess? At least they actually hang out sometimes and seem to get along quite well. They think in similar ways (but Kusakabe isn't a pedophile/groomer).

OTP

Yaga. Pretty much the only real ship I have with him. I liked their little scene in ch 147 already, but his last moments when facing Sukuna have made me actually consider them as a ship. What he says about Yaga and how he wishes he was there with him to give him advice or fight by his side was quite touching. I also like the little nod of Kusakabe getting the same injury that killed Yaga (I think Kusakabe will survive it though). I wish there was more about these two and the way Kusakabe cares about other people in his life. Hearing Yaga talk about Kusakabe during his fight and then have Kusakabe wonder what Yaga would say if he was still alive would have been really touching and much more fitting than those disjointed "interviews" (yes I'm still upset about that lol). But I mean generally, a couple that raises the dead together, stays together. They both have to work through the death of a child or children they were close to, so it doesn't surprise me that they got along so well. Yaga also manages to bring out the more vulnerable side of Kusakabe, which is what I'm really interested in. I wonder how their relationship started out exactly. There must've been something that made Yaga trust Kusakabe so much that he showed him the other autonomous corpses and told him at least a little bit about how they work. Was it the incident with Kusakabe's sister? Was Yaga involved or was he just trying to cheer him up afterwards and that got them talking about the respective people/children they lost? I think this is definitely the most interesting aspect of Kusakabe's character.

nOTP

Don't have one, although there are a couple of ships I don't really see the appeal in like Kusakabe/Takaba. Why would they be interested in each other? But it's nothing I can't stand at all.

random headcanon

Usami is his sister and she used to be a sorcerer who at some point got traumatized to the point of being catatonic during a mission, where she also lost her son. It's also why he tries to tell himself that he won't risk his life for others anymore because he has seen what happens if you fail and he is scared of seeing other people he's close to die. So he emotionally distances himself and tries to not get too close with others or for others to develop an attachment to him.

unpopular opinion

He doesn't come off as a "cool guy" to me, just bitter and repressed. Also people shouldn't take everything he says as Word of God.

song i associate with them

Can't really think of one.

favourite picture of them

[libraford]

gods as someone that was raised in several churches (mom minister so I got all the shitty behind the scenes drama starting at like 4yo and never really believed beyond general agnostic-ish feelings. which apparently is a super common trend for pastor/minister kids to nope tf out of the church asap) the 'forcing you to be The Right Christian™ Or You Don't Deserve™™ Charity' thing hits hard. especially when I psych myself out of asking for help because I'm constantly remembering how openly hostile some of those places are to even poor christian people using their services.

like one particular church (the "open and affirming" one that threw the only trans woman out of the 20 person congregation because the old white guy treasurer learned she was trans after like 8 years and suddenly didn't want to look at her, or "worse", hear her sing) had a monthly meal for the (very poor neighborhood) community. they'd make everyone pray to God for 20 minutes before letting anyone touch even a slice of bread, but lock them out of the sanctuary during church hours because they were, I wish I was joking and that this wasn't a direct quote, "dirty homeless looters". you had to pray correctly to get food but don't you dare sully the churches doorstep trying to attend worship. meanwhile the church people organizing it are going off about how dare these people be standing in line for food instead of attending church as Real Good Christians Should.

🙃

That's fucking frightening and unfortunately I have my own similar stories.

Tw for racism, homophobia, anti-Muslim, and just... really bad stereotypes.

One of the reasons I started walking away from the church (there's a couple reasons) was at our summer mission trip (yes, I know.) In previous years, we had kept local: deep cleaning the homeless shelter, renovating the local Latino advocacy building, soup kitchen stuff. But one of the (more wealthy) girls in our group wanted to try doing a mission abroad.

Best we could do is Toronto.

We signed up with a shelter there and they gave us some tasks. The shelter REALLY played up how bad it was in this part of town- the gang violence, the culture of sin, the regressive way the men treat women in their home country.

So like... I'm from America. I've been to Chicago. Not to compare but like... hmm..

So during the introduction to how terrible it is in Toronto (...?) Our ambassador takes us through parts of town to show us what it's like to be homeless there. It was a very somber thing. We were given a small amount of money and we were to pretend it was all we had. Try to survive on a few coins.

We take our tour. Remember that this is supposed to scare us.

She takes us to an area where we hear drums. We hide behind a building. "You hear those drums? This is a homeless village. Young people come here seeking community, but you will be turned away if you cannot provide a service for them. They will only use your body for so long."

So... I'd been to drum circles before. And this was very much a drum circle. Like sure these people were a little crunchy, but it was pretty clear to me that these guys were just cutting loose after the day of work.

She takes us to the red light district.

"This is the red light district," she says. "This is where all the homosexuals come. You see that there are many young people here who are attracted to the high life. But you will see: the older men will always come looking for the younger one's to manipulate and that's how many homeless people become prostitutes."

I, a half-in-half-out of the closet lesbian, for the first time in my life, saw two happy gay men arm in arm and it was moving for me. I saw people having a good time. I'd already figured out she was full of shit. Now I was mad.

So we get back to the church we're staying at and I'm already having second thoughts about this visit to Canada. She tells us that our mission this week is to tutor some Somali kids in English and math.

... I feel... oncoming dread.

They didn't give us a lesson,plan or anything. Were supposed to just help them learn where they're stuck in their lessons. And then on Friday we'll have a trip to the museum of science and industry.

I was the only one in our group that had ever encountered a Muslim to know that Friday was their holy day. And that was when I realized that it was a conversion tactic. I asked her about it like... 'is Friday really a good time to do that?' And she was like 'well, it's the last day you'll be here and we want to celebrate don't we?'

And I was livid, but I was in a different country with a bunch of people who believed this woman's lies. And I didn't say anything to my friends because I was already kind of an outcast there, no one was going to believe me.

So I held my tongue, but from then on I lost a lot of respect for Christian-run charities and even now I'll always be looking for their angle.

[tetsunabouquet]

Basic Instinct Chapter 27

A/N: HAPPY BIRTHDAY EVERYONE! Today, the first chapter of Basic Instinct turnt 1 year old. I mentioned before how xenophobic native English speakers dragged me for my mistakes as a non-English speaker to the point I stopped publishing fanworks and I'll admit the lack of support also wasn't motivating. Basic Instinct is the first fanfic I've completed since my very first fanfic that I actually kept to myself that I wrote when I was 11 years old. Yes, I am saying completed as I had planned this to be the final chapter. There's something poetic about releasing the ending on Basic Instinct's birthday and it just feels right to end the story at this point. Don't worry guys, you guys will still be getting an epilogue and a blooper reel where I will be releasing some short funny scenes like the off screen dance Kotaro and the reader did at the Maji Burger in chapter 5. I thank every single one of you for being here on the journey! masterpost

Today, was Akashi's birthday. Rima had planned out everything and you, Momoi, Reo, Midorima and Kuroko had filled her in with the occasional comment about what they thought might be nice too. Last week, before winter break, Reo had slipped the invitations to Nebuya and Kotaro, and Momoi did the same for Kise and Aomine as Kuroko took care of Kagami and Murasakibara. Kagami had been a bit surprised to be invited too, but after careful thought everyone agreed Kagami also should be getting an invitation. You were glowing with excitement and wore a beautiful, expensive dress that Rima had given you as an advance Christmas gift as you did feel a bit insecure as Masaomi would drop by on the party. You didn't wanted to look cheap, knowing how he felt about you. Rima had her scary side, but she had embraced you like a granddaughter and you knew she truly had your back if Masaomi were to act coldly towards you. So if anyone should be scared, it should be him. At least, that's what you kept telling yourself. You had been as thoughtful as possiblr. For one, you had written his birthday note with the markers he had bought for you on your first date. It had been hard to think of a birthday gift, because what could you give a boy who had almost everything already? You had been grateful for your friend Mari-Chan. As the two of you had chatted about the topic and how you thought of perhaps a self-made gift, she had the most brilliant idea. With the help of everyone, you had managed to collect a decent number of photos of Akashi and his friends, the few ones of the two of you and Rima had doubles made of childhood photographs with his mother. Spending your money on a few magazines of National Geographic, you had created the most beautiful collage of nature pictures to create a pretty backdrop, and then you carefully started making a collage of Akashi and his loved ones on top of your first collage. Mari had given you the money for the frame as those magazines had blown your budget, telling you how you always had her back when she needed you and this time she wanted to help you. She also said she thought you and Akashi were a cute couple in general and how much happier you looked now that the two of you had one another. Mari nearly chocked in the tight embrace you'd given her. Now, as you entered the Kaneshiro mansion with your gift, you couldn't help but think of how the dress and the pretty mansion remembered you of a fairy tale, with you being the princess. Fujioka came to place your present with the others, and the old man smiled at you. "Thank you for giving him his joy back. This birthday will be the best my young master will have ever gotten, and its all thanks to your love that he's getting what he deserves. I'd be honored of serving you as the lady of the house one day." Your face got a little red and you could feel a few tears pricking your eyes. The compliment touched you, and you gave Fujioka your warmest smile. "And I thank you, for getting him to the warm home he deserves." "Oi, y/n-chan!" Kotaro yelled, arriving with Nebuya and you let out a soft chuckle. Another servant took the gifts of their hands and they led the three of you to the dining hall. The usual table was shoved into a corner where the small pile of gifts rested atop A new, larger table was seated in the center of the room, sporting the largest birthday cake you had ever seen in real life, and plates with various different foods. Midorima and Tamamura-san seemed to try their hardest to distract Murasakibara from eating before the party started. Kuroko, Kagami and Momoi were reacting to something stupid Aomine had said, Momoi was rolling her eyes and Kuroko was saying something you couldn't hear with Midorima's scolding drowning out his voice. Reo was chatting up with Umemiya-san and you guessed it was probably recipe related. You could recognize Yuuki, chatting up with some other maids as they eyed the commotion as you did. Only Kise hadn't arrived yet.

After another half hour, all of you gathered around as Fujioka went to get Rima and Akashi. Kise still wasn't there yet! You hoped it wouldn't hurt Akashi's feelings. As the anticipation arose in the room, and you could feel the excitement jittering in your skin, the doors opened. "Surprise!" They all yelled, only to see Kise in the doorway, carrying his gift. He chuckled as he walked into the room, "Hi!" "Kise, why are you so god damn late!" Aomine grumbled annoyed and Kise pouted. "Aominecchi, I am supposed to be fashionably late." At that you and several others chuckled, and just then did the doors open again, this time with the actual birthday boy, butler and grandma. As everyone gathered some air, they once more shouted, "Surprise!" Akashi looked on with big surprised eyes and then looked at his grandmother. "I thought you deserved an actual birthday." He couldn't help but feel his eyes water, and he hugged his grandmother. You broke out into a wide smile, looking onto his happiness. Akashi walked to your group and said, "I'm happy you made it to my birthday." "He's here now. Can we finally eat?" Murasakibara asked hungrily. Akashi chuckled and said, "Of course, let us feast on this occasion!" And so all of you took your own seat. The cake only had one candle, so Akashi did not have to worry about the cake's large size. He closed his eyes and made his wish, 'I wish my bonds with these people will never change.' All of you clapped as he blew out the candle, and almost with lightning speed did Murasakibara took a slice. Everyone looked flabbergasted at his audacity not to let Akashi go first, but he shrugged it off with a happy smile, because all of you were there and that was the gift he had always wanted. Each of you then took your then filled your own plate, and just as you took your first bite of food, did another butler bring in Masaomi, awkwardly holding a gift. "Take a seat father." Akashi said, and Masaomi handed his gift to the butler. You immediately felt anxious, but then Rima smiled at you and you couldn't help but smile back. 'thank you', you mouthed, for all her support. And the party did go over smoothly. Masaomi talked mostly with Rima and the servants that evening, observing you, Akashi and his friends from the sidelines. Which came much as a relief. Before you left to go back home, Akashi embraced you as you bid your goodbye to him in the garden. "You really look stunning in that dress. It suits you perfectly." He complimented and your face flushed red. "Thank you, your grandmother has great taste." He chuckled, his eyes bright and his smile so wide that it hurt but he couldn't help how happy he was. You wrapped your arms around his neck. "Happy birthday Sei." Akashi leaned in and kissed you with such delight, the two of you felt as if you were set afire. There was no moment more perfect then this.

[muninnhuginn]

Li Tianchen and Li Tianxi timeline redux

Thought I'd do an updated version of this timeline with the information we have as of episode 11. The majority of it remains the same as my last attempt, but I've clarified some stuff around the photo/phone in early s2 and provided more character justification for certain actions.

There remain a couple of blank spots in the timeline where we can only infer what happens (Liu Lan and Chen Bin deaths). These may be shown in episode 12, but if they're not then we have to presume to take them at face value with our current knowledge.

X years prior to present day

Li Tianchen meets Liu Xiao at the fountain. Liu Xiao makes an impression on him as someone who was really cool for diving in to fetch his ball despite the water. At some point in this time period, but before his parents die, Li Tianchen shares his home situation with Liu Xiao.

Liu Xiao says that you have to really gun for what you want. He speaks of how the world is a "jungle" and only a few can evolve and become "hunters", else they must be prey. Li Tianchen internalises this.

Seven years prior to present day

Li Tianchen and Li Tianxi live with their parents. Their father (Li Fan) hears rumours of their mother (Liu Lan) cheating on him (rumours which their neighbour stoked as confirmed in ep 9) and uses it as an excuse to physically abuse her and threaten them all with a hammer when they try to help her. Li Tianchen and Li Tianxi flee to the other room. At this point, Li Tianchen and Li Tianxi are touching each other (but not Liu Lan) and Li Tianxi is clutching the photograph taken earlier that day. It appears as though Liu Lan (possessed) takes the hammer and approaches Li Fan but we don't get to see the full scene before CXS is thrown out of the dive and there is no knife involved at this stage. When we return, Liu Lan is dead by knife and Li Fan by hammer. Li Tianchen later claims to Qian Jin that he killed both of them. However, we haven't seen what actually happened and Tianxi's later retelling has a flashback of Liu Lan apologising to her which must happen sometime in the blanked out scene.

The twins meets Qian Jin at the site of the crime scene, who takes them both on board and modifies the police files relating to their case. The twins have their police files erased and vanish and Qian Jin quits the force.

Tianchen meets with Liu Xiao again sometime after this to update him on their situation.

Sometime in this gap, Qian Jin asks Tianchen to possess and kill his wife's co-worker. This is explicitly the first kill Qian Jin asks of Tianchen and it is someone LTC realises is innocent. This likely contributes towards his later mindset of him only being an "agent" of others when conducting murders and there being no "innocent victims".

Y months prior to the current day

We next see Tianchen and Qian Jin meeting with Liu Min. For Li Tianchen, this is the first time they meet. This appears to be several years later as Tianchen seems much older. Liu Min says Qian Jin has already helped "resolve matters with that woman" (I do think he literally means in a lawyerly way in retrospect rather than a murdery way, especially when QJ's first response to him asking to take care of the online attacks is to say "I'll send them letters".). As Liu Min has use of his legs at this point, this places this scene at prior to season one episode one and so months before season two.

Liu Min is asking QJ and Tianchen to target his "haters", that is, those who talk badly of him or spread rumours about him online, and his first target is Tianchen's former neighbour. It seems that the neighbour hasn't changed his rumour-spreading ways. Tianchen laughs.

Chronologically alongside and after season one episode one

Liu Min tries to threaten Emma after the games company news breaks and his embezzled money is at risk. It gets out of hand and he ends up with a crashed car and paralysed legs. Emma heads to the bridge, intending to commit suicide, but is stopped by Cheng Xiaoshi. Emma is then possessed via photo* and leaps to her death, Cheng Xiaoshi as the only "witness". This leaves Li Tianchen with some knowledge around Cheng Xiaoshi's role, but not the specifics of his powers. There's enough to make him intrigued and believe he may have found a worthy opponent (and/or saviour), but not enough to locate him with.

*Emma is possessed via the twins' combined photo-puppet powers. Usually Tianchen's powers leave his host unconscious with a blank space in their memory during the period he puppets them, but Tianxi has been shown to occasionally break through this (as in the cases of Liu Lan and Chen Bin).

End of season one/start of season two

Possessed Liu Min abducts Xu Shanshan and is invited to CXS's "game" the next day. When he shows at the photo shop he's trapped in the developing room where he mentions that he was "only an agent" (because he was carrying out the killings on behalf of someone else?) and that he would never kill "innocents". Once CXS reveals this was all a trap to get a confession, Tianchen then retreats from Liu Min. Liu Min is taken into police custody.

Later that day, when CXS jumps back to try and save Emma, Qiao Ling is possessed and stabs Lu Guang. When CXS returns, possessed QL claims that CXS "cheated" in their game and is able to figure out some details of CXS's powers. Possessed!QL also lets slip that CXS's powers "also" involve photos, with the "also" leaving CXS his own hint about the possessor's powers.

Liu Min is possessed again and made to commit suicide. It's unclear in which order Lu Guang's stabbing and Liu Min's "suicide" happen and whether they occur simultaneously or not. With the knowledge of the twins' powers we have as of episode 11 though, it doesn't seem possible for these events to have happened simultaneously.

Happening chronologically alongside season two episode two

Qian Jin retrieves a photo of Chen Bin and passes it on to Li Tianchen as they drive towards the hospital. In the car are QJ, XM, LTC, and LTX.

Chen Bin is puppeted, confiscates Liu Min's phone and passes it off to Xiao Ma (Qian Jin's lackey). Xiao Ma heads off the roof to leave Chen Bin to face his death. (Note: Tianxi's telling of her backstory shows a shot of Chen Bin apologising and crying. It could technically have taken place at any time, but it makes most sense it fits here)

Tianxi breaks free from Tianchen's control and runs off crying. Tianchen chases after her. She is wearing her school uniform and Tianchen his blue hoodie and mask combo.

(Speculation time! If we presume that CB crying flashback happens at the same time as LTX crying as she runs it would imply that CB dies immediately as Xiao Ma goes down the staircase. This would leave no time for one of the twins to make it up to the sixth floor or above in time to meet him. And we know from Lu Guang's descriptions to CXS/QL in ep 2 that the phone pass-off has to happen at sixth floor or above because Xiao Ma has to switch to the lift on that floor.

The best explanation I've seen to resolve this timing issue is that Tianxi broke free and removed Chen Bin's control before Tianchen was able to throw him off the building. This meant that Xiao Ma had to double back and physically yeet Chen Bin off the roof. Chen Bin who is a trained police officer, yes, but up against someone willing to play dirty. This would then gain the extra time needed for someone to make it up to the staircase to meet him. It would also explain how in Tianxi's tale (ep9) Tianchen appears to miss the family of bunnies that likely represent Chen Bin and his family. It also explains why Xiao Ma tells the twin he hands the phone off to that he had "handled the aftermath".

I don't know if at this stage we will get this confirmed, just because we only have one episode left and there's a decent amount to cover, but I do believe this explanation makes the most sense. Speculation time over.)

One of the twins at the staircase asks Xiao Ma for Liu Min's phone. They don't speak and the fringe seems to resemble Li Tianchen's. The outfit matches the last time we saw Tianchen chronologically (blue hood, mask). Xiao Ma also presumes this is Li Tianchen at the time. This occurs chronologically before the scene in the next paragraph as Xiao Ma is confronting CXS and QL when LG tries to leave his hospital room and is arrested immediately following the confrontation.

Lu Guang tries to leave the room and receives a photo from the same twin. This has a photo of Liu Lan and Li Tianxi on the front and the back says about not wanting to lose a good brother, with a childish doodle next to it. The twin delivering the photo wears a blue jacket and a mask which appears to match with the twin on the staircase.

Episode 11 seems to have confirmed that Tianchen was the twin to both retrieve the phone and give Lu Guang the photo. There's still a tiny bit of doubt left in me, but at the same time, I don't think there's much time left for another 'twist' on this point. Also, like, the clothing. If it were Tianxi, she would have to swap clothing, get up there to do both exchanges, then swap back to the school uniform she was in when she was found. Not to mention that we now have some justification for why Tianchen would hand off the photo (last glimpses of hope) and no real reason for why Tianxi would want to nab the phone. (Her current personality isn't particularly strategic or manipulative in terms of using the phone as leverage. She just wants to escape. The police also never found the phone on her when they took her in)

Season two episode three/four

A few days appear to have passed since episode two as Chen Bin's funeral has now taken place.

At some point during this period, Li Tianxi is found at the old games store near her old house. The police take her in, but as there is no missing person's report and she refuses to communicate, she remains in custody as an unknown person.

Qian Jin speaks to Xiao Ma and realises that one of the twins took Liu Min's phone. (He updates Liu Jing on this after the funeral though he may have known of it before). He doesn't confront Li Tianchen about this despite XM heavily implying it to be LTC who took the phone. I'm honestly not sure of his rationale here, but I suppose he is the type to stew in the idea of potential betrayal. And several of his later remarks to Tianchen become very pointed if you read them as warnings *to* Tianchen.

"Li Tianxi" phones Qian Jin. QJ asks "have you found him?" (The English subs here assign a gender which isn't there in the original) Qian Jin comments that this (plan) is "pretty risky" but so long as it's carried out before the police realise it should work. Most likely this is Li Tianchen disguised as Li Tianxi soon to walk straight into a police station. The person they're discussing looking for therefore is likely Tianxi herself. This "Tianxi" is wearing the pink hoodie as far as I can tell.

Qian Jin and Li Tianchen discuss the specifics of Li Tianchen's escape from the police station beforehand. Qian Jin lays out all the instructions of the plan so Tianchen just has to follow them and retrieve CXS.

"Li Tianxi" shows up at the police station and asks for CXS.

Season two episodes six to eight

Tianchen-as-Tianxi uses CXS's sympathies to get him to touch him whereupon he possesses him. He then also possesses Wang Juan and together they leave the police station. Tianchen makes it to the docks but isn't able to take CXS. Instead, LG is taken himself.

The police put out a notice for Li Tianxi only to realise that they already have her in custody and she clearly isn't the same twin they just interrogated.

Miscellaneous notes

Clothing-wise, in s2, we appear to have Li Tianchen wearing a blue hoodie and a mask during the hospital scenes and in the meeting with Liu Min. Even in his younger years, his general colour scheme was blue with bits of yellow.

Li Tianchen wears a pink hoodie, mask, and wig when disguised as Li Tianxi.

I don't think we ever actually see Li Tianxi herself wear the pink hoodie, though I could be forgetting something. Still, when not in her school uniform, her colour scheme does seem to align with pink.

In both cases I suspect the mask is used to obscure their identity. You could make an argument for there genuinely being a safety element to it, though we only really have Tianchen-as-Tianxi's sob story to contribute to that.

It's really fun how Tianchen turns the rhythm of the interrogation back on CXS

Liu Min's phone has "family secrets" on it according to QJ and Liu Jing's ep 3 conversation. Implications about Liu Xiao??

I can't place exactly when Li Tianchen meets Liu Xiao again, but am reasonably sure the chronology in the episode is accurate here and it's before LTC meets Liu Min for the first time. Liu Xiao said that LTC would have opportunities to "hunt" in the near future and there Liu Min was. Also, we know that Liu Xiao was studying abroad around the time of the present timeline so it has to have occurred before then (from the 'will we meet again' and 'it's almost time' I'm tempted to say this scene is just before LX leaves for abroad honestly).

Also, LX says the difference between a 'hunter' and a 'beast' is that a hunter hunts even when not hungry - this is where the scales get tipped from self-defence to actively killing - it's an important mental shift for LTC.