#I also got very sidetracked while trying to write this so it took a little longer

[morningmask27]

You seem like a good person to ask this, and I’ve enjoyed your Warrior Cats posts.

I’ve never read them.

Is there a preferred order to read the books?

warrior cats is a monstruously huge series; (like really a lot a lot). nobody even expects you to own all of these and if you don't find them in your library, here's a link to all the pdfs

the first book in the series is "into the wild" and it's basically the best starting point for any warrior cats adventure. then reading the entirety of the 6 books of the prophecy's begin to have the full story if this arc. (warrior cats is split in arcs, all of whom have 6 books, we are currently at arc 8 right now...)

after TPB you have a few books that kinda open themselves to you; Firestar's quest is the first super edition (longer books than the main arc books at a difference of about 300 vs 500) or you can immediately jump into the next arc: The New Prophecy and read how the adventures continue. the first book there is called Midnight (also book five is called Twilight, do not get confused by it's more famous counterpart, this one has nothing to do with it).

(if you do read firestar's quest two other books kinda tie into them: SkyClan's destiny (another se), Cloudstar's Journey (a novella, they are smaller than the main series books) and Skyclan and the stranger (a graphic novel/manga/comic, whatever you want to call it)

the arcs go as follow: Power of Three -> Omen Of The Stars -> A Vision of Shadows -> The Broken Code -> A Starless Clan (there is also Dawn of the Clans: it's a prequel arc about how the clans were made, you can technically read it whenever you please, but it's suggested to keep it for after oots as it was written after that arc and a few things from that previous arc connect to this new series).

I'd say you at least read the four first arcs as they really have a lot of supplemental material attached to them, which would get confusing if you don't know what's happening in these arcs.

but from then on there are suggested reading lists, here's a somewhat outdated one, but it still does the job quite well. honestly you can just pick and choose whatever interests you most. some additional (SE's, Novella's, graphic novels...) books have ties to the main arcs (which are the main thing to read if you want to get into warriors), but they're not always needed, so pick and choose; this series is very vast and you'll probably find something that piques your interest!

if you do want to check up on a few things about the books or others, there is a warrior cats fandom wiki that will normally answer any question you have

[lemonmelonboy]

Head canons for Taylor Potts - Because he's got my head in a fucking vise grip.

18+ Readers ONLY - Minors Do NOT Interact! Minors/Ageless Blogs will be Blocked!!!

 I Do NOT give any permission for my work to be Reposted, Translated, or used with AI in ANY Capacity!!!

The image I drew is like- You took his jacket in a play fight and when he was trying to get it back you put it on, and he just could not be upset anymore. You were wearing his jacket and he short circuited. So of course, all he wanted was to see you in it more and so his silly little brain went "yes wear this whenever... please... I'm not asking- I'm begging... you're so pretty."

He has that shirt because it reminded him of Steven Universe and that was the show you introduced him to the first night you stayed at his house- and its possibly your favorite show ever.

If you ever go to the movies with you, he would insist on buying separate popcorns just because he would absolutely have no confidence to take popcorn if the bucket was in your lap. Nor would he be able to handle it if you kept reaching over to get some. Also, just he would not be able to focus if you accidentally brushed his hand while getting some popcorn.

He was more than happy when you willingly joined his little club, he probably went home and squealed like a little schoolgirl because he was so excited to be able to have more time with you.

His little fanfics are probably mostly cuddles because whenever he writes anything more he just gets too into the thought, and gets sidetracked, so he never gets to finishing it.

If you played games with him, he'd probably try his best to not sit near you because you tend to get very touchy when competitive and over excited, so he needs to avoid you touching him or else he'd get too distracted.

Movies at home are a similar situation, which sucks because you both are very much cuddly movie watchers- but Taylor absolutely get excited and he's too afraid of ruining the movie or missing anything. However, once you two start dating, he no longer is allowed to sit away from you, and you get to be as clingy and touchy during movies or games as you want.

You absolutely tease him nonstop for being a "salt is too spicy" type of person. And you try to introduce him to new food, but he has trouble eating most of it.

He would nearly faint is you offered him like a piece of candy or something with your mouth. The pocket challenge used to be all he thought about doing with you when it was super popular but now, he could- he would not be able to do it, no matter how much he'd like it.

Hand holding is the number one thing he wants from you, especially when you started dating. He'd crave it anytime you two were apart.

[yourlocaldisneyvillain]

hii <3

i indeed would like to ask for the “director’s commentary” on a particular story :))

your rambling is everything, so go wild on poor little meow meow Larissa and our favourite menace Wednesday hehe

hiiiii!!! sorry it took me a bit before my brain got less mushy and i could string coherent sentences together! i'm still very much sick though so excuse me if i ramble a bit too much lol.

okay so these two live in my brain rent free now. it started off more as a challenge? or something to be like wooo controversy, and like. how can i make this work. but even though it started that way i never intended it to be like, badly done. from the get-go i put a lot of thought into it and wanted to actually make the story as high-quality as i could in terms of character development, their relationship and all the technical aspects (you know as you are one of the betas haha, and you know how many times i tweaked things, proofread, and how many times zephyr and i went through it). like i wanted to develop it as much as one can reasonably do in 14 chapters without getting sidetracked. and that was supposed to be the gimmick, like oh some ppl are gonna think it's controversial but it is actually well done and they might still be inclined to read it if they just bothered to try! (like a naive lil disney princess i forgot this is the internet lol)

the more i got into the story, the more i adored these two and their dynamic, or rather the dynamic i created for them. i think they just work, or more like, i've made them work. ppl have accused me of being a pedophile multiple times in the last couple of weeks while i've been posting the story lol, and asked me if i ship them in the show now, which is imo just fucking ridiculous. this is a separate universe that builds on what we had, or rather should have had, in the show, a story about two grown women who are both very odd in different ways and have found love and belonging with each other. i think neither of them could do a conventional relationship in my universe, and so this makes perfect sense for them!

i love writing larissa as a poor lil meow meow. there is just something about a pathetic, lonely middle aged woman that makes my brain go brrrrrrr. and wednesday is just a delight to write. i love channeling her voice. i used to be a lot like wednesday as a teen lol, that's sorta how i talked (i had no friends lol), so channeling her is a fun blast from the past and feels very natural to write.

it was a joy to write tbh! and personally, i don't think it's like.... even that out there or particularly (hehe) controversial? it's very much a coming of age rom-com sort of thing, but make it like... Quirky and include some dark humour. the outraged reactions i got to it honestly made me wanna write actually controversial stuff lol. i tend to want to spite the haters :)) and prove my point that fiction is fiction. i am very annoyed by the whole puritan internet culture, it really fucking irks me, esp when it's enforced by the self-proclaimed weirdos and goths and whatnot, who don't know what pedophilia even is lol nor could recognise it in fiction or real life. i know i won't get my point across to people who have already made up their mind about me being the actual pedophilic devil, but i will sure have my fun! i can't wait to challenge myself again! :))

also "particular" really inspired me to write longer works!! and i learned that i am most comfortable with that sort of format. all the things i am planning in the future are multi-chapter fics and rather long! and how i prefer to do it now is to write it all in advance and then post -- that way i know i won't lose interest midway haha. i am motivated by that sweet dopamine of wanting to share my work!

so yeah, i met some lovely people bc of this story (looking at you @the-frankenman-writes, actual gem and joy and delight), i strengthened some friendships, and i think it definitely made an impact on people! i grew a lot as a writer and it pushed me to refine my skills! so all in all, i'm very happy <3

stay tuned for the last chapter!!! a christmas special! :)))

[nettheworldonfire]

The post that almost wasn’t...

I started writing this post in April.  Yes, April.  Five months ago.  

Then I got sidetracked and tried to finish in May, but the end of the school year had me too crazy to actually finish it.  Then it was summer and well, I couldn’t be bothered with opening a computer most days.  Too much fun in the sun to be had.  Now it’s the beginning of the school year and I’ve never been more stressed out and tired, but it’s Blood Cancer Awareness Month and I’m due for a post...

So, be patient with me as I retell this story(ies?)...and try to keep things reported in a timely fashion from here on out.

On Sunday, August 14th, I had my 30th Lanreotide injection and tomorrow I’ll have my 31st. It’s been two and a half years of this medicine, and it has been working to keep my tumor growth to a minimum.  I am very thankful for that.  

Back in mid-April, I had been experiencing significant pain under my right rib for about five days, and since that’s the general spot my liver is in, I was super stressed that it was my tumors acting up.  After some convos with oncology, they asked me to come into the Perlman Center at UPenn to see the oncology urgent care team and get my scans done a bit early. (They were scheduled for May 3rd).  So on April 26th, I made the hike into the big city. I forgot about how annoying it was to drive into West Philly (damn you, Schuylkill!) since I was re-diagnosed in February 2020 and only had one in-person appointment at Penn due to the pandemic.  I hate figuring out parking and being lost in a hospital, then anxiously hanging in waiting rooms.  I don’t mind meeting new nurses, techs, phlebotomists, and nurse practitioners who are always pretty incredible.  But since the logistics of huge hospital systems gives me heart palpitations, I always ask the person who schedules me where I should park and how I’ll find my floor and the office I need — and the scheduler this time was also super helpful…until I got there and multiple roads were blocked with police and construction.  I ended up parking a little ways away and taking a shuttle which wasn’t so bad - even if the driver was repeatedly screaming that she was gonna punch someone right in the face.  I would have had anxiety leaving my car in a garage with my work computer and other such valuables, however because I haven’t cleaned out my car in forever — it definitely appears like I live in it — and certainly doesn’t look like it would be holding anything of value — so I think joke’s on you, robbers!  

They took me back to get my CT scan pretty quickly but then I had to wait while they asked about doing a scan of my chest as well as the pelvis/abdomen, as my CT scheduled for the following month was for both and insurance likely doesn’t want me getting two CT scans within one week.  Once they got that approval, I got the scan with and without IV contrast of my abdomen, pelvis, and chest.  It’s cute how they always ask me if I have an underwire bra on or any such thing.  I have to remind them — I’m a pro. (Who wore a metal-free slob suit to work also).   I didn’t have to drink a Barium smoothie — so that’s a plus.  As the CT tech was taking out my IV, he asked if I wanted him to leave it in because I was getting an infusion afterwards, which was news to me since I haven’t had an infusion in 10 years.  So he took it out, and I went to “infusion” where it turns out they sent me for a blood draw and would have used the same IV had we left it in. Another needle in the opposite arm, and all is done.  Then I waited for a nurse practitioner, Marie, to go over things with me.  In the meantime, I got a notification that my bloodwork results we’re already in my portal (less than ten minutes after they drew it).  Holy quickness. Things looked normal to me, and I was told someone would call me to review. Marie said that they would get results of the CT scans that day, but definitely not for a few hours — so I should go home and wait there.  She did call me later that night and assured me that all was status quo. Nothing looked like it changed and my liver was probably not taking over my body like an alien life form. 

Dr. Teitelbaum and I had our normal follow-up telehealth appointment the next week and she confirmed, things are still growing so very slowly, there is nothing to worry about it.   It didn’t appear that my liver was causing the pain, and since the pain subsided in time, there wasn’t much else to do.

I had my injection in April, May, June, July - and then had new scans done.  This time, still only minimal growth, but Dr. Teitelbaum said she doesn’t want to become complacent, and asked me to schedule an appointment with Dr. Soulen in interventional radiology to see if he things I should be moving to next steps.  I was originally told this medicine works for 3-5 years in most patients, before the cancer outsmarts the meds.  It makes me pretty nervous to be creeping up on the low end of that timeline.  Especially since any cancer of mine is of course going to be smarter than the average cancer, right?  So I can’t be shocked if they say that next steps should be considered soon.  But I was kind of getting used to the idea of just pretending it’s not there and getting my backside injected once a month, forever.  I thought the appointment with Dr. Soulen was this past week, but realized I missed a call where it was rescheduled for October 5th -- so I will update again after that one.

In addition to all of my routine cancer screenings/scans/treatments, I have also been subjected to other diagnostics recently.  My OBGYN has been increasingly more demanding and the appointments are all so time consuming. I went in for an annual visit and the doctor recommended an endometrial ablation.   Two weeks ago I had to get a mammogram (simply because I am nearly 40 and well, that’s the kind of fun stuff you do when you’re middle-aged).  It took 8 days, but I received a little letter in my electronic file that started with this sentence...

WOOT WOOT!  Again, not that we (or anyone) had any concern about my breasts -- but hearing that a part of me is cancer-free is always so uplifting.  However, the radiology results lag makes me a little stressed, because I HATE waiting.  Apparently there is a major radiologist shortage right now.  And every other kind of shortage, but I can handle waiting a little for food or slightly longer lines places...

A few days later I got my ultrasound reports (abdominal and transvaginal) which also appeared normal (although they couldn’t find one of my ovaries, so I guess they can only say they are 50% sure they are normal).  This Thursday, I have an endometrial biopsy and then HOPEFULLY NovaSure -- the endometrial ablation.  Just one thing I’d like to get under control, ASAP.  Fingers and Ovaries crossed that it comes back normal or whatever is needed so I can schedule this procedure.  In the meantime, I am not opposed to rain-dances for menopause or an approved hysterectomy.  

In December, I will have another Gallium scan -- you know the one so wild they only do it on certain days of the week at certain times and they tell you not to hold your kids after for a day or so because you’re still radioactive -- cool, cool.  And that’s to make sure it’s still only in my liver and not traveling elsewhere, without a passport.  

And to end this with a dose of kid-comedy... This weekend my kids asked me why I get the injections at home and I told them I like when the nurse comes and gives me a shot in our house...and they translated that to, “Mommy likes getting it in her butt in the dining room.” Hoping this isn’t the overshare they decide to present in school this week.  

So that’s the update for now -- more to hopefully come soon.  Love to you all for being patient in hearing “news” for me, but no news is typically, “Sam still has cancer but she’s alive and her normal, albeit crazy, self” (aka good news, I think?)  Until next time...

[harrison-abbott]

Dear Son

My old father wrote me a letter that I got by surprise through my mailbox. I didn’t even know that he knew my address. And I had not spoken to him in over 30 years. And his letter said this:

Dear Son.

               I’m ill these days and I wanted to send you a message before I go because there are many things I regret. I also know that this is far too late to be sending you a letter like this. But I wanted to send it all along. And it’s up to you if you want to accept it or not.

     I have cancer of the liver and I don’t have very long to live. And I know that you also know why this particular cancer is the case. I remember how mean I was to you when you were little. And your mother, too. I didn’t appreciate her and I gave her up too easily. And I should have sent you more money when you lived with her down south. I did really love your mother. She remains among the most beautiful women I’ve ever met. You probably know that more than I do. Remember her blonde hair? It was yellow like wheat fields in summer, oh, it was so glorious. But I was too arrogant to care about all of that and I got sidetracked by other people at the theatre.

     Your mother never really got into the whole theatre thing. I don’t thing she was interested. And when I met all of these other people then I drifted away from her, and you. My career was going this one way, and her another.

     And then when she moved south with you I wasn’t able to completely keep in touch with her. She hated me. I understand why. I sent her gifts for her birthday and I would call the flat you lived in. But after the first few calls she didn’t pick up the phone. And then one time when I did answer it was this man speaking and so I assumed she had moved on. And I sent along some presents for your 2nd birthday. But I never got any answer to whether you received them, so I didn’t know if you ever got them. Did you?

     I found you through social media. And I asked your Aunty Veronica who I also found through Facebook, to send me your postal address. I hope you’re not offended, son, at me contacting you this way: I just thought it would be more ‘romantic’ if you got a letter from me rather than hearing through me via something as dumb as a Facebook thing.

     Of course, it must be mentioned that I really do miss your mother. And I thoroughly regret not being able to come to her funeral a few years back. It was Veronica who told me that she had passed away. I cried a lot when I learned how she had passed. And I wanted to come down. But I just wasn’t able to make the date down due to the tough schedule at the theatre.

     Here I am, talking all about me. I should be asking about you! How are you doing in life? Veronica said that you work at the university? That is amazing. I never had any valve for academia, because I’m more of a bohemian man. Haha. Did you ever try any of the arts yourself? Are you creative in any way? I’d be keen to know. You seemed like a shy baby but I hope you’ve become an extroverted adult. Please write back and tell me about your life. Do you have a wife? My phone number is -------------- and I would love it if you gave me a call.

     Once again. I am so sorry that I haven’t been with you in life. And if somebody had invented a time machine then I would have gone back a long while and done things differently with your mother and you, my little boy.

     I regret, also, that nobody ever knew about you fully.

     Because I’m getting a lot of animosity from the magazine people about this son that they never knew about. That nobody has ever known about. I have tried several times to tell them that it was your mother that left me and took you south. Well, you know the story as well. The reporters keep badgering me for your whereabouts. And I haven’t told them yet where you are now.

     But perhaps if you could come up here then we could meet them together and we could do a piece with the newspapers? The culture papers, I mean. The best ones.

     They would really love a story like that. And I can pay you for coming up. And, since I won’t be alive much longer, I can discuss what I could leave left with you in my will? There are several assets I could pass on to you, if you’d be willing to come up.

     In the other paper I’ve left you the contact details of my lawyer and, well, me, haha. Please get in touch by phone or email. I must add that I will have to know soon. For obvious reasons.

     The newspapers would like to speak to you and know your story. And I know this one especial reporter who has interviewed me before and I’ve played golf with him a few times. A nice chap. I’m sure you’d love to meet him. It would be beneficial for both of us to do this whole thing.

     Best Wishes

     Your Father.

I read all of this in a oner. At the kitchen table when I was home alone.

     And I didn’t tell my wife about it when she came home. I’d hidden the letter in my bedroom and didn’t want anybody else to see it and I did not open up to anybody about it until long after my father had died.

     Alas, there was no response to his letter. Why the fuck would I respond to a letter like that?

[praxeus-13]

Hello! So happy to see a new fic blog, especially one that has fics for the Master! May I request a fluffy Dhawan!Master x reader in which the reader is the doctor’s companion but doesn’t want to admit she’s in love with the Master? And you can choose the circumstances, but maybe the master “captures” and hypnotizes her in front of the fam and she accidentally reveals it? Thank you so much! I loved “warmth” a lot. 🥰🥰🥰♥️♥️♥️

Thank you so much! I absolutely loved this request as I was already planning on writing something along these lines. I couldn’t find a way to get the hypnotism to work but everything else is there so I hope you enjoy!

Well Kept Secrets

Pairing: Dhawan!Master x fem!Reader

Word Count: 2800

Summary: (what the ask says)

For: @agentmalfoy24601

Warnings: None

You really hadn’t meant to fall for The Master, but intention never seemed to stop anyone when it came to falling in love.

When you first met him, as O, you weren’t quite sure what to think. He was a bit strange, but still sweet - and while he wasn’t your type, you couldn’t deny that he was very attractive. However, there were a few moments when you would look at O and see someone else, and that person interested you. Looking back now, you knew that you had seen his persona slip, even if just for a second, and that had been what had drawn you to him.

When he had revealed himself on the plane it had only drawn you in more. Of course, you had been terrified in the life or death situation, but you had also felt a buzz of excitement and intrigue. If he hadn’t have left you to die on that plane, you know that there was a chance you would have gone with him.

Then The Doctor had sent him off to the Kasaarvin’s dimension and you had lost hope of ever seeing him again, only for him to show up two weeks later.

The Doctor had taken you all to some market planet, given you a credit stick and told you to go off and explore. Originally, you had been wandering around with Graham, but then you had gotten sidetracked and lost sight of him. You had also lost sight of anything else that you recognised so you had started to amble around in hopes of finding someone or something to help.

At first, you hadn’t even seen The Master, so focused on your surroundings that you almost walked right into him, and you barely understood what was happening when he grabbed your arm and dragged you down a quiet side alley.

When you had finally recognised who he was and what had happened, you had been to shocked to stutter out a full sentence. That had caused him to smirk and cockily ask if he was the only one who could leave you speechless, which only made you more flustered.

Once you had finally managed to compose yourself you asked how he was alive, a question that he had ignored in favour of pushing you up against the closest wall and kissing you. It took your brain a few seconds to catch up with the fact that he was actually kissing you before you started to kiss back. Then he had swiftly broken off the kiss and told you that he’d be seeing you, before walking out of the alleyway and back into the bustling streets.

By the time you had finally made it back to the rest of the group, you had managed to get your brain back to its normal working order. Though, when your friends asked you where you had been you told them you simply told them that you had gotten lost after spotting something interesting, resolving not to bring up The Master at all.

True to his promise, he had shown up again about a week after that, kissing you senseless yet again and leaving with little explanation.

After this happened a few times, always when you got separated from the group, you started to have proper conversations with each other. A first they were only about whatever trouble he had caused on the planet to distract The Doctor with, but soon you had started to talk to each other more and more about your lives. He wasn’t as stingy on details as The Doctor was, but you could tell he was still keeping quite a bit of information from you.

Then he started showing up at your apartment, which was a little bit concerning, but he always knocked rather than just bursting in like you knew The Doctor would, so you didn’t really mind. Soon enough your relationship had changed from just meeting up and making out for five minutes, to meeting up and talking for a few hours. Though it was slow, you felt yourself start to fall in love with this strange alien man.

Of course, this caused a lot of internal conflict, especially considering you were still travelling with The Doctor and the rest of the fam. You knew that they were your friends - practically a second family at this point - but you feared that if they ever found out about your relationship with The Master you would loose them. So you kept quiet and tried to pretend that you weren’t secretly dating the man who had tried to kill you all. Every time the two of you met up on one of your trips with The Doctor was both exhilarating and frightening, and while you loved seeing him all the time you were always worried that one of your friends would catch you with him.

When The Master invited you to travel with him instead of The Doctor several months into your relationship, you didn’t quite know what to say. You knew that you loved him, but you had never been able to say it aloud, and you weren’t even sure if he loved you back. As well, it wasn’t like you didn’t like travelling with The Doctor and the fam; it was brilliant, even if you did end up running for your life on most adventures, and you weren’t sure if you were ready to leave them just yet.

Unfortunately, you had taken too long to give The Master an answer, and he ended up storming off without stopping when you cried out his name, not caring to listen to any explanation you had to give.

That had been a month ago and you hadn’t heard a word from him since, which had only upset and worried you. Even if you weren’t ready to travel with him then, you had hoped that you could still be in a relationship with him. You knew that your friends had noticed your mood, and they had all tried to talk to you about it, but you reassured them that you were okay and didn’t say anything more.

————

Now you were on another adventure with your friends, using it again to distract yourself from debating whether you and The Master had broken up or whether he was going to randomly show up and pretend that nothing happened. The planet that you had landed on was overrun with nature, and the ruins of whatever civilisation had been there previously were barely noticeable.

Somehow The Doctor had managed to find a very large cathedral-like building that was still mostly in tact, which was what you were currently exploring.

Without any warning you were grabbed from behind and pulled into someone’s tight grip, causing you to yelp and try to struggle away. Then you noticed who exactly had a hold of you and you stopped struggling as much, making a conscious effort to not relax completely into the hold that you had gotten so used to after the last few month.

Your friends had turned around at the noises and their faces were now a mix of anger and concern, glaring at The Master.

“Let her go.” The Doctor told him, her tone indicating her worry.

“Well, I would, but I think (y/n) is quite comfortable in my arms Doctor.” He spat his response at her, tightening his grip further, but still making sure not to hurt you.

You were trying to resist looking up at him, because you knew you wouldn’t be able to hide the love that your expression would hold.

“No, you’re scaring her, now let her go and I might consider giving you whatever you’ve come here for.”

In your chest your heartbeat had started to pick up speed, you could see that The Master was trying to let onto your friends about your relationship, and you only hoped that he wouldn’t actually say anything.

“Hmm, seems I know your companion better than you.” At this comment you finally looked at him, hoping that he would see the look in your eyes and just walk away without saying anything.

He didn’t look down at you though, and just stayed glaring at The Doctor.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” The Doctor was starting to sound irritated, but there was a hint of fear in her voice as well.

Still trying to stop him from revealing your relationship, you squeezed his hand and tried to get his attention. Unfortunately, he continued to ignore you, and you started to feel much more anxious.

The Master let out a hysteric sounding laugh at The Doctor’s question, and it wasn’t anything like the soft laugh you had grown used to. Though you hated to admit it, he was starting to scare you.

“You don’t even have a clue of what I’m talking about.”

Looking back at the four of them to gauge their reactions, you could see that Yaz and The Doctor were very close to piecing it all together, and Ryan and Graham wouldn’t be too far behind. Instinctively, you pressed further into The Master’s hold, trying to feel some semblance of comfort or safety. Obviously he knew what you were trying to do, he had gotten used to you snuggling close to him whenever you watched a scary movie or had a nightmare, and, either consciously or unconsciously, he started to stroke the back of your hand with his thumb.

“No…” The Doctor’s gasp could barely be heard, but it still caused your gaze to fall to the floor in shame.

You knew that you probably shouldn’t love him, but you did, and now you were going to face the consequences. All you hoped is that after loosing your friends, you wouldn’t loose The Master too.

“Yes.” The Master replied gleefully.

“You can’t- you must have hypnotised (y/n)! She wouldn’t willingly enter a relationship with you.”

“Well, clearly she would, because she did. I haven’t hypnotised her, or threatened her, or drugged her. (Y/n) is with me by choice.” The Master was very clearly pissed off at the implementation that he would do anything to injure you.

Honestly, you were slightly annoyed at it too, the only time he had ever come close to harming you had been on Barton’s plane, and you had gotten out of that alright in the end. You squeezed his hand for comfort again, and this time he squeezed back, calming you down slightly.

“Stop playing games and give (y/n) back.” The Doctor’s voice sounded almost dangerous now, and you were starting to worry for both your safety and The Master’s.

However, The Master seemed unfazed as he ignored her and continued to hold you, “You know it’s true, I can see it in your eyes, but if you’re still having trouble believing it then why don’t you just ask (y/n)?”

Of course he would put you on the spot, you had known him long enough to realise that this whole setup was coming from a place of vulnerability. He was worried that you were going to leave him, that you didn’t care for him anymore, and instead of talking to you about it he was lashing out. It was something that you had been trying to work on with him, but after your hesitation to answer his proposal of travelling with him, he had jumped to conclusions and this was the result.

The silence after he had told The Doctor to question was so deafening that you swore your frantic heartbeat was echoing around the abandoned building. You forced yourself to look up, to look at The Doctor in the eye, and it seemed to be the push she needed.

“(Y/n)?” She didn’t need to ask the question, it was already hanging in the air.

“I chose to be in a relationship with him, he didn’t force me into it.” And then, much quieter, you added on, “I love him.”

Part of you had hoped that no one would have heard what you said, but the room you were in had been dead silent. The Master’s grip on you relaxed in shock, holding you as though you were fragile enough that you could shatter like glass. You tilted your head towards him so you could see his reaction, still slightly worried that he wouldn’t reciprocate.

He seemed to be staring down at you with awe and love, and you couldn’t quite believe that he was looking at you like that.

“You love me?” He asked you, his voice impossibly soft.

You simply nodded in response, unable to form any words. The Master bought one of his hands up to cup your face lightly, as though he was still afraid of breaking you.

“I love you too.” He was almost whispering when he said it but a smile immediately formed on your face.

He leant in to kiss you and you kissed him back eagerly. Unfortunately the kiss was cut short by a not so subtle cough from the direction of your friends.

Still comfortably in The Master’s hold, you turned to face your friends again, feeling your face heating up as you blushed.

“Okay, am I the only one who’s really confused?” Ryan asked, looking around at the rest of your friends for confirmation.

He got a chorus of ‘no’s’ in response and if it wasn’t such a strange situation you might have laughed.

“Yeah, how come you’re in love with the guy who tried to kill us? Cause I feel like I’ve missed a lot.” Graham asked, as clueless as he usually was.

“I’m pretty sure that (y/n) has been secretly dating The Master.” Yaz piped up, and you were slightly glad that she had answered for you.

“Yeah that’s basically the gist of it.” You laughed awkwardly, yet again squeezing The Master’s hand for comfort.

They seemed to mull over this for a few minutes, before The Doctor finally spoke up again.

“(Y/n), are you sure that you want to be with him?” She asked you, and for once it was a question that you could answer easily.

“Yes, I am.” You smiled at her, and you knew that The Master was probably smiling at you.

“Then I suppose I can’t do anything to stop you from loving him.” Then she turned her focus to The Master, “but if you hurt her expect serious consequences!”

He rolled his eyes, “I wouldn’t expect anything less, but I won’t hurt them.”

The Doctor and your other friends then proceeded to interrogate the two of you (though they were mainly focused on The Master) about your relationship. Even if it was slightly annoying, you appreciated their concern and protectiveness over you. During the ordeal The Master constantly acted as though he was extremely annoyed and offended at their interrogation, though you could tell that he was glad you had such good friends - even if one of them was his best enemy.

Eventually the six of you made it back to the two TARDISes, and you all paused outside. He hadn’t bought up the question of whether you would join him in his TARDIS since the first time, and you were still slightly worried that you had missed your opportunity.

Then he turned to you, still holding on of your hands even though you were no longer in his hold, “Want to travel with me?”

He asked with such hope in his expression that you felt your heart melt, even after you had rejected him the first time he was still holding out hope.

A wide grin formed on your face and you nodded, “I’d love to.”

He grinned back and pulled you in for another kiss, much to the disgust of your friends.

The next thirty minutes were spent packing up your possessions and moving them from The Doctor’s TARDIS to The Master’s. That was then followed by teary hugs as you said goodbye to your friends and made promises to call and meet up with them whenever you were all on Earth at the same time. The Doctor made sure that you knew to call her if anything ever went wrong, promising that she’d be there immediately.

Despite the grief that you felt leaving your friends and that chapter of your life behind, you were eager to start travelling with The Master and to see how your relationship would develop. The Doctor, Graham, Ryan and Yaz had definitely become a second family to you, but you knew that this wasn’t going to be the last time you saw any of them.

Holding The Master’s hand, you let him pull you into his TARDIS as you waved goodbye to your friends, before turning around and beaming at him. As soon as the door was shut he pushed you up against it and kissed you senseless - reminding you very much of your first kiss with him.

“Where to first, love?” The Master asked as he brushed a stray piece of hair away from your face.

“Anywhere, as long as it’s by your side.”

[astaroth1357]

The Obey Me Cast on a Camping Trip (Part Two: The Undateables)

This post is split in two due to length (I had too much fun again…) For the Brothers, please click HERE!

Intro:

Another day, another team building activity between the demons and the exchange students. It was Diavolo’s idea to go on a camping trip to the human world (because of course it was), and there were very… mixed responses. That sentiment wasn’t helped when he refused Lucifer’s insistent pleas to just purchase cabins for everyone to stay in. Oh no, the Demon Lord wanted to rough it out in the wilderness, and now everyone else was getting dragged along with him…

Wonder how that turned out?

Diavolo

He was soooo excited to get to experience camping! He had been asking the MC about human camping trips for about a week before making the announcement and he was pumped!!

Barbatos chauffeured him to the campsite in his own car (of course) but he insisted on taking every roadside, touristy stop they came across which doubled the drive time considerably…

He wanted to help everybody set up the camp but Barbatos and Lucifer were having none of it… So he took pictures and offered moral support instead! Good work everyone! 😁

He had his own tent about the size of a small house (ngl it took Barbs and Lucifer about a half hour to set the whole thing up). Barbs even somehow managed to pack a collapsible desk in there for him so he could still work… greeeat…. 🙄

Diavolo wanted to try everything. Literally everything. The man even traded his uniform out for full on outdoors gear, right down to one of those floppy fishing hats with the tackle stuck to it.

Politely insistently asks that Lucifer does things with him. The MC could come along as well (and in many cases Luci begs them to do so) but he wants to get some bonding time in with his best friend!

Unfortunately for Lucifer, Diavolo would get sidetracked quite a lot… Which is how he ended up having to physically steer his Lord out of harm's way more than once…

At one point while hiking, Diavolo was so distracted by taking pictures that he nearly walked right into the path of a passing bear and her cubs. Lucifer had to tackle him down into some bushes until they went away... His brothers teased him mercilessly when they heard about...

Dia also loved the camping food quite a bit. He's never gotten the chance to cook his own food before, even if it's just marshmallows over a fire, so it was all a brand new experience for him! S'mores are now declared a human world delicacy.

Man had the time of his life! He'd love to do it again, hell, maybe even make it a yearly event! (Few of the brothers share his sentiment, but hey, it pays to be King 😏)

Barbatos

If his Lord orders it, then he follows. He'll just have to double check that everyone is prepared for the occasion…

Drove Diavolo there with the patience of a saint (while also, like, being the exact opposite of that). Had it been anyone else in the car, they might have told him, "No, we can't stop for pictures of every moose you see," but Barbs is as accommodating as he is loyal.

It was pretty much all on his shoulders to direct the others when setting up camp. Lucifer would claim it was his, but let’s be completely honest here, Lucifer can't order Barbs to do shit. 

Naturally, he had his own tent close to his Lord, more modest in comparison, but big enough to hold a majority of the belongings and gear Diavolo had requested.

He also managed to bring a almost fully functioning kitchen setup for him using magic, minus a working oven by Diavolo's instruction. If he wanted a heat source, he had to use the campfire and he found the challenge intriguing…

For once in his extended life, Barbs had to do some trial and error in the kitchen. As it would turn out, fireside cooking can be a little difficult to master, but by the end of the trip he could still somehow dish out four course meals without so much as a sweat (according to the MC the secret was tinfoil and cast-iron cookware… who knew?)

When he isn’t prepping their next meal (which let’s be honest, with Beel on the trip that’s a constant activity) he’s guarding the food from Beel and Solomon…

The sorcerer wanted to help, but Barbs has already learned the hard way that if he so much as pokes a dish its flavor is ruined… It’s enough to make him wonder if it was a curse laid on him at some point…

Watching Barbatos deny Solomon becomes a pretty funny routine in and of itself. He’s not above just smacking the man’s hand away with a wooden spoon if it gets too close. Barbs doesn’t play in his kitchen. Back off. 😠

Barbatos is happy with the trip so long as the young Lord enjoyed himself. If that’s the case, and it was, then he’d happily do it again if asked… not that he’d have much of a choice anyway.

Simeon

Simeon was familiar with the concept of camping, he’d written about it in his stories, but he’d never actually done it himself… He had hoped it'd be an interesting experience! And uh… it was that from the very start… 

Purgatory Hall got its own car and Solomon was put in charge of driving… But no one mentioned that he drives like a complete maniac. Speed limits, stoplights, even the ROAD ITSELF be damned. Solomon drives in a straight line from point A to point B and if there’s anything in the way he’ll just use magic to get around it…

It’s safe to say that by the time he and the others got to the campsite (which was significantly quicker than the rest) the angels weren’t in the emotional state to pitch tents… He and Luke just waited for the others to catch up while praying and praising the solid ground beneath their feet…

He shared his tent with Luke and didn’t mind at all. It was probably for the best anyway because the little angel was scared of human world predators like bears and wolves coming for him in the night… Poor boy…

Simeon took to hiking quite a bit. Going out and exploring the area around the campsite made him feel invigorated! The forests were beautiful and it gave him ideas for a bit of a guilty pleasure he's been debating on writing, "The Tale of the Lonely Prince." 🤭

It was on one of those trips that Simeon discovered human world creatures love him. Pretty much all of the wildlife gravitates towards him like he's a Disney Princess.

At one point he came back to camp riding on a moose with birds chirping on his new friend's antlers. He offered to take the MC out for a ride, but the brothers threw a fit about it…

He WAS able to get a couple more wrangled for Diavolo, who naturally dragged Lucifer along (though he clearly didn't want to touch the thing). 

The three ended up getting into a mooseback race because Diavolo wouldn't let Lucifer take the lead. He was glad to see Luci enjoy himself for a change! (It helped a lot that he won of course 🙄😏)

All and all, Simeon had a great time. Maybe he should ask the MC to show him more human places… But he's never getting in a car again. Pardon his language, but fuck those things!!!

Luke

He doesn't know what's worse… being out in the middle of nowhere with a bunch of demons or the absolute insanity that was the "drive" down… 😣

He spent the entirety of Solomon's Magical Ride of Nightmares clinging to Simeon or the armrests for dear life. He swore his entire life flashed before his eyes, can angels even have heart attacks???

Stayed right next to Simeon when they finally pulled themselves together enough to leave the car. He was so happy that Michael didn't see any of that… Who knew human transportation was so horrifying…???

His saving grace (literally) was getting to share his tent with Simeon… After Solomon told him that bears sometimes get curious and ransacked campsites, he clung onto the older angel like a protective charm.

...Whiiiich he wasn't too off about actually after he saw Simeon playing (yes PLAYING) with the human wildlife… Simeon had to introduce him to some of the nicer animals for him to eventually get over his fear and venture out past the campsite.

Luke loved to swim in the lake or river with MC and the others. The MC found a sturdy branch where they set up a rope swing and the little guy amused himself for hours!

Sometimes he'd watch Barbatos prep and cook using the campfire… He didn't even know you could make lasagna in a Dutch oven…

At one point the MC convinced him to go with them and the twins on a particularly long hike…

He got tired halfway through and Beel offered him a piggyback ride, but of course he'd NEVER let himself be that close to a demon!! (Just kidding, poor boy was so tired he climbed onto Beel's back and held on the a kola until they got back. Then he jumped off to save face)

He had a better time than he thought he would, but still doesn't want to go camping with demons ever again. (He and Simeon also begged Lucifer to drive them back instead of Solomon so the brothers' van was pretty much a clown car on the return trip).

Solomon

Solomon hasn't been camping (for enjoyment) in quite a while, so when the prospect came up to do it with the MC and the other students he was intrigued...

When Simeon asked he knew how to drive, he said yes. He knows how to start a car, put it into motion, steer, and then come to a stop. That's all driving is really. 🤷‍♀️ You can't blame him for not memorizing all the rules, he's been traveling by portal for decades!

Was pretty confused why his angel friends fled the car so quickly... He got them there in one piece, after all. 😕🤷‍♀️ He put up their tents himself since they were too busy thanking their father then made a magic barrier around the site for protection purposes.

He and the MC both have their own tents, of course his is enchanted to be a lot bigger on the inside than it is on the outside, but he's only let the MC in on that little secret in case they want to visit… 😏

When everyone else finally arrived, Solomon was happy to help the MC introduce the wonders of the human wilderness to their companions! Including the breathtaking vistas, beautiful flora, bitter temperatures, man-eating predators, waters filled with disease… Hm? Oh, Luke won't leave the tent now…? Whoopsie.

Solomon kept himself occupied on the trip the best way he knew how… relentless trolling (particularly of Asmo and Barbs because they're used to his shit).

He'd alternate between poking fun at Asmo for the almost ritual length routines he was going through to try and save his looks to genuinely trying to encourage him and downplay the severity of the downgrade...

Meanwhile he was bound and determined to serve at least one of his own dishes during the trip (but Barbatos had banned him from the "kitchen," the food tent, and even the spoons...)

Diavolo, nice guy that he is, eventually made Barbs relent and let Solomon cook for ONE night… It went as well as to be expected. (They sent Solomon to grab more supplies then everybody took turns washing their mouths out with lake water... Diavolo apologized profusely, he had no idea...).

Solomon was confused why the angels would rather squeeze themselves in with the brothers than ride with him back but he wasn’t upset about it. That meant he could make a few extra stops without anyone complaining! He knows a guy in New Orleans he’s been meaning to see again… Luke and Simeon can wait a little for their stuff, right?

Click HERE for Part One. Check out my Masterlist for more!

[iam93percentstardust]

First of all, Happy Birthday Month!!! Many happy returns!! I have been reading fanfiction for e very long time, but this is the 1st time I have ever submitted a prompt. I kinda think Stuckony would be great but I am down with Winteriron or Stony, wherever the prompt takes you. You're amazing so I know it's gonna be fantastic! Thanks in advance!💜💜💜 “Is that your robot?” “That’s a rude way to talk about my husband.”

This was such a fun prompt to write, thanks for sending it in! And thank you for the birthday wishes!

As always, everything I write is also on ao3

~

Something taps against Bucky’s foot. At first, he ignores it, figuring someone just bumped into him, but then it happens again and then for a third time. He looks down, fully expecting to see a small child, only to see a small gold and blue robot run into his shoe, back up, and then run right into it again. It looks a little like an atom with a central core and three rings spinning around it in multiple directions. He smiles at the oddly charming behavior and bends down to pick the robot up, wondering if it came from one of the many glittering exhibits he and Steve have walked past today or if it belongs to someone.

“Hey, Stevie,” he begins, thinking to share it with his husband, but when he looks around, Steve isn’t anywhere near him. Bucky sighs and turns in a circle, hoping to spot him somewhere in the packed crowd. Who knew the Stark Expo would draw so many people on a Tuesday in the middle of March? “Stevie, you’re too small to wander off like this.”

He feels a tug on the hem of his coat and then a small voice primly says, “Excuse me, Mister Sir, that’s mine.”

“Huh?” He looks down again, this time to see a young girl of about six or seven years holding onto his jacket. “Oh! Is this your robot?” he asks, crouching down to her level.

“That’s a rude way to talk about my husband,” she informs him, holding her hand out for the robot.

Bucky blinks at her. He’s heard about kids playing pretend with their toys but that’s usually things like Legos or dolls, right? Not a whirring, circular robot that doesn’t even have a face.

“Can I please have Jarvis back?” the girl asks, insistently tugging on his coat again.

“Oh, sure, sorry about that.” He passes it back to her and then looks around, hoping to spot the girl’s parents before she realizes she’s left them. He’s dealt with plenty of upset kids at the school he and Steve work at, so he’s more than capable of handling any meltdown she might have, but he’d like to stave it off if he can. Unfortunately, he doesn’t spot anyone frantically looking for a lost kid, so he’s just getting ready to resign himself to dealing with a crying kid when Steve appears from out of nowhere.

“Hey, Buck, sorry about that, got sidetracked by one of the exhibits. The person works with sand and sound to make art, it was really—” He stops short at the sight of the girl hugging her robot. “Bucky. You didn’t pick up another stray, did you?”

“Excuse me?” Bucky asks, affronted. “I never—”

“No? So what’s Alpine then? Or Dodger? Or, for that matter, me?” Steve crouches down next to the girl and holds out his boney hand for her to shake. “Hey, kid, my name’s Steve. This is Bucky. What’s your name?”

She gives him a suspicious look, but must decide that he’s safe because she says after a moment, “Morgan.”

“Well, Miss Morgan, why don’t we see about finding your parents?” Steve offers. “It looks like they’ve gotten lost.”

Morgan turns one way and then the other, noticing for the first time that she’s alone. Her lower lip trembles, eyes welling up with big, fat tears. “I—”

Bucky, sensing an impending meltdown, quickly says, “Hey, it’s okay. We’ll find them. We grown-ups are pretty good at getting lost. It’s up to brave kids like you to help us get found again.”

Morgan sniffs, but nods. “I’m here with Uncle Happy,” she says, sliding her small hand into Bucky’s.

“Then let’s find Uncle Happy,” Steve says decisively. “Would you like me to hold your robot?”

She shakes her head, clutching the robot tighter to her. “You can’t take JARVIS,” she says. “He’s mine.”

“Okay,” Bucky says soothingly. “We won’t take him away.” He shares a quick glance with Steve. “Should we start at Lost and Found?”

“If I may, Sirs,” the robot suddenly says in a cool British voice. Steve yelps, jumping away from it. Bucky startles, dropping Morgan’s hand.

Morgan giggles. “Don’t worry, that’s just Jarvis. He’s an artificial intelligence.” She pronounces the words carefully, like it’s something she’s been taught to say. She holds the robot up, who lights up with every word he says.

“The tracker in this device has been activated. There will be no need to move from this location. Sir will be here momentarily,” Jarvis tells them.

“Jesus, Mary, and Joseph,” Steve mutters, taking a closer look at the robot. “It talks.”

“I am Just A Rather Very Intelligent System or—”

“JARVIS,” Bucky realizes. “It’s an acronym, not a name.”

“Quite so, though I was named for Edwin Jarvis, an old friend of Sir’s.”

“And Sir is…?”

JARVIS lights up like it’s going to talk again but before it says anything, they hear someone say loudly, “Morgan H. Stark!”

Morgan’s face brightens and she turns, running right into the arms of a slender man in a suit, closely followed by another larger man. “Daddy!” she exclaims, throwing her arms around the man, who catches her up in a tight hug.

“What have we said about running off?” the man asks, sounding worried. He has a familiar voice, Bucky thinks. He wonders where he’s heard it before.

“I didn’t run off,” Morgan protests. “JARVIS did and I had to get him.”

“You didn’t think to tell Happy where you were going?” The man gently brushes her hair out of her eyes before straightening up, setting Morgan on his hip.

“I didn’t have time! JARVIS was moving too fast.”

The man makes a dissenting noise. “Flaw in your logic.”

She shakes her head. “No flaw.”

“Yes flaw. JARVIS has a tracker. You, O’ Great and Powerful Maguna, do not.”

It’s adorable watching the two of them together, seeing the way the man softens the longer he holds Morgan and the way Morgan leans into him. And it doesn’t hurt that the man is wildly attractive too: all big brown eyes and curly hair that Bucky wants to feel between his fingers (he bets they’re as soft as they look). Bucky feels something stir in his heart that he hasn’t felt since the day he met Steve. He quickly glances at Steve, wondering if Steve feels the same way. Steve’s eyes could practically be cartoon hearts, he’s melting so obviously, and Bucky smiles to himself. Maybe, if they play their cards right…

“But I didn’t get lost,” Morgan protests and points at Bucky and Steve. “I had Mister Bucky and Mister Steve.”

Abruptly, all the warmth drains out of the man’s expression. He looks at Bucky and Steve coldly, mouth a thin, tight line. “Oh you did, did you?” He turns to the second man behind him. “Happy, could you take Morgan for a moment?”

“Daddy—” But Happy—who looks more like an Angry than a Happy—has already nodded and taken her from the man’s arms.

“You got it, boss.”

The man now stalks closer to Bucky and Steve. “Alright,” he says abruptly. “How much do I owe you?”

Steve’s expression goes blank. “I’m sorry?” he repeats, voice tense with hidden anger.

“What do you want for this?” the man says. “Finder’s fee, something to keep you quiet, what do you want?”

“Look, I don’t know who you think you are—” Steve begins heatedly, right as Bucky realizes where he’s seen this man before.

“Stevie, stop,” he mutters, catching Steve’s arm before he can get too angry and take a swing at the guy. “That’s Tony Stark.”

“Huh?” Steve looks again and then his face clears. “Oh. This must happen a lot, huh?”

Stark glances between the two of them, looking confused now, rather than angry. That’s good; that’s something Bucky can work with.

“Look, we’re sorry about all this,” Bucky says apologetically. “But we’re really not trying to cause trouble. Morgan’s robot ran into my foot, that’s how we met. We didn’t even know who she was until you got here. You don’t need to pay us off or anything.”

“Really,” Stark states suspiciously. “So I’m not going to wake up tomorrow and all the headlines are saying that I can’t take care of my kid?”

“We’re both teachers,” Steve says, gesturing at him and Bucky. “We know kids wander off all the time. They’re more slippery than a bar of soap in the shower. You’re not going to hear anything from us.”

Stark slumps and runs a hand through his hair. He looks tired all of a sudden, not that Bucky can blame him now that he knows this entire Expo is being run by him. “Sorry,” he says quietly. “You just can’t be too careful in this line of business.”

“I can imagine,” Bucky says soothingly. “If it would help, we’d be happy to sign an NDA.”

“Pepper would probably kill me if I didn’t ask you to,” Stark admits. He sighs. “Great, first time I contact her since the divorce and it’s about my fuckup.”

“You’re not a fuckup,” Steve insists. “Seriously, this happens all the time. Just last week, I had a kid decide he wanted to keep looking at the snails in the Botanical Gardens we took the kids to while the rest of us went to lunch. Took me an hour to find him.”

Tony gives him a hopeful look. “Really?”

“Really. It’s okay. You’re not a bad parent.”

“I’ve just—I’m supposed to be presenting in—” He checks his watch.

Happy shouts, “Five minutes ago, boss.”

“It’s my presentation, I think they can wait for me if I’m running late. Morgan didn’t want to wait while I was prepping so I asked Happy to take her to see some of the exhibits. I didn’t think she’d wander away.”

“Well, hey, we’d hate to make you any later,” Bucky says. “So we’ll let you—”

Morgan pipes up, “Daddy, can’t Mister Bucky and Mister Steve come too?”

“Well—”

“They were so nice,” she says, making her eyes big and wide. “And I think we should be nice and let them watch.”

Stark smiles helplessly at her. “You know what that is? That’s extortion.” He turns to Bucky and Steve again and shrugs. “Do you want to come? It’ll be backstage, so you won’t get to see as much as you would if you were watching from the front. But it’ll be fun, I’m presenting the new arc reactor. Oh—and please, call me Tony. We’re all friends here, no need to stand on formalities.”

Steve and Bucky have one of their silent conversations that always bothers their friends. “Are you sure?” Steve asks. “We wouldn’t want to be a bother.”

Tony gives Bucky a very obvious onceover, followed by a look at Steve, just as obvious and just as hungry. “Oh yes,” he murmurs. “I’m sure.”

“Then we’d love to,” Bucky says, giving Tony a onceover of his own. He and Steve don’t often invite a third partner to their bed, but there’s just something about Tony.

“Great!” Tony chirps. His eyes go dark and heated as he adds, “And maybe afterwards, we can talk about a way to pay you back for helping Morgan out.”

“Tony, really, we don’t need anything,” Steve begins.

“Please,” Tony purrs. “I insist.”

[citadelspires]

P1 - Given how great you're track record's been for doing hypothetical interactions of Amphibia kids with the Duck kids and Owl House kids, let's try doing the Duck kids meeting the Owl House kids and who they'd like the best. I'll exclude Violet for this for the sake of evenening things out 5 to 5. I'd assume Luz would get along best with Dewey (both jump into adventure), King with Louie (could see em teaming up for a scheme), Willow with Huey (eh, more leftover interaction but can work)

Screenshot of second half of the ask provided. Text: P2 Gus with Webby (would totally ask each other lots of questions about their species), and Amity with Lena (both got abusive figures they stood up to and would totally talk about their crushes on Luz and Webby LOL). Would love to see you take on Duck kids and Owl House kids interactions.

First of all I’m very pleased to hear you find my track record on these posts good, they’ve been really fun to write and it makes me really happy people like them! Second I am so sorry it’s taken so long to get to this ask, it’s a really in depth one and it took a long time to write, I hope you’ll find it was worth the wait!

Aight! Oh and one last thing real quick before I get into it. I hope you wouldn’t mind me adding Violet back in, partially due to the fact I love her, but mostly because there’s actually another owl house character I think works significantly better with Louie than anyone else and I really want the chance to talk about that. Saving that one for last hehe. This’ll be another long one, writing below the cut.

Luz and Webby So I do like a lot of the possible interactions brought up by your suggested grouping but my mind went in a few different directions. I’ll start with Luz, who would fit in best with another excitable adventuring partner, as pointed out, but I think the best fit for her in that regard would actually be Webby. While Dewey would no doubt get along great with Luz, there’s a special element to the potential relationship between Luz and Webby that really elevates the potential of their friendship to another level, that being: they both want to eat a hamburger.

An aspect of Webby I wish the later seasons of the show got into a little more, but is definitely something I would consider a core part of her character, is the fact that she got held up in the mansion her whole childhood, with no opportunities to interact with the world around her, have all the adventures she wanted, and most importantly to just be seen as the kid she wanted to be. And while Luz was technically able to go out into the world, the place she found wasn’t one that was willing to see her, or give her any of the chances she longed for. Both Webby and Luz fully understand that feeling of being trapped in your own life, of finally getting the chance to break out and just doing your best to make the most of it. I think there’s a lot the two could gain from spending some time together.

(Also, to borrow the bit about gushing about their crushes but from the other end, these two would totally get sidetracked talking about their respective crushes and also trying to play wingman for each other. It’s a massive comic disaster in both cases, but somehow both Lena and Amity manage to find it endearing).

Amity and Violet Okay wait lemme explain. While the two of them don’t have a whole lot in common at first glance, I think they would genuinely get along extremely well. While a lot of Amity’s focus on school came at the force of her parents, you cannot honestly expect me to believe that girl isn’t a studious nerd on her own anyway. Heck even outside the realm of studies she throws her full dedication into literally every single thing she does. Remind you of anyone? Beyond just being extremely intelligent Violet is clever and ready for anything. She takes everything in stride and always has a plan, she can go from “we were sleeping over and you said everybody get on the plane, so we got on the plane” to “I brought an axe” in a minute flat.

I like to think the two of them would have a mutual respect for each other based on their respective intellects upon first meeting, but as they become closer friends they find they can move from more serious respect to a casual enjoyment of each other. I would go as far as to say that both of these characters really value dependability in a friend, and that they each provide a lot of that. To wrap back around to the stuff about intelligence I think Violet could provide a lot of insight to Amity as far as showing her that pursuing studies and academic heights of her own volition can be something that she can just do because she wants to, and that’s no excuse for unhealthy parental relationships. Getting along so well with someone like Violet only to see that her parents are actually really loving and supportive, that would be really eye-opening for Amity I think. For Violet’s part she could get a lot of help from Amity as far as her pursuit of the secrets of magic goes. I suspect Amity would be much more interested in the study of her magic than Violet would be able to get Lena to tolerate lol.

Bonus Round: Amity would absolutely be a senior junior woodchuck and she would love it you cannot convince me otherwise. She starts quoting the JWGB around the owl house kids and they all look at her like she’s crazy.

Lena and Willow I feel like this one might seem a little out there at first but trust me on this one. Initially Lena doesn’t think too much of Willow, being as close as she is to Webby she knows liking flowers and cute things doesn’t mean Willow is automatically to be taken lightly but she feels like she’s got a good read on her that she generally prefers to avoid trouble and turns down opportunities for violence, which isn’t really Lena’s deal. Over time Lena figures she was right about her first impressions as Willow doesn’t seem to take many opportunities to expose some hidden power, even when Lena knows the people around her kinda deserve it.

She learns to adjust her opinion when she finally does get the chance to see Willow in action and realizes that girl is more powerful than any of the other kids she’s met in the boiling aisles bar none(yes this is my genuine opinion of willow if you don’t think she could kick your ass you’re wrong). It’s at that moment where she starts to pay more attention to Willow and notices a lot more of the strength she puts into all the little things, how much she cares for everyone and everything, and it does a great deal to show Lena that maybe having super strong magic powers isn’t mutually exclusive with being kind and gentle. And maybe gentle isn’t her thing but still, it’s nice to know.

For Willow���s part she’s just happy to make more friends. Especially if the opportunity arises, as I like to think it would, when they’re close enough friends, that Lena would start to hint around asking questions about how Willow remains so casual and nice with the ability to do so much damage, and Willow takes the chance to help Lena figure out her magic a bit more, and learn how to better appreciate it as an aspect of herself she doesn’t have to be scared of. (I mean come on Lena never really learned how to do any of it except barely kind of from Magica of all people she could really  use something like that).

Huey and Gus Now there are some certain things about Gus that would drive Huey absolutely nuts. His lack of primary and reliable sources for any of his information being a big one, but at the end of the day I think he’d enjoy Gus’ desire to learn in the first place. Gus would probably be a little dubious about Huey’s “sources” and “citations” but if it helped him get more info on the human realm he’d certainly go for it in the end. In that way the two balance each other out pretty well. Gus is studious and intelligent but he’s a little off the wall, he’s got a big creative streak, and he’s really excitable. Huey is really really good at facts and analysis but he lacks the strength in imagination that Gus has. Huey is able to take all the grandiose concepts Gus is able to think up and help make them actually happen. Gus has that specific brand of an adventurers soul matched up with the fact he’s not actually the type to get into danger and fights, meaning he’s able to drag Huey out of his comfort zone a little and help him reach new heights with his mind that his struggles with creativity prevent him from reaching, while managing to not make him feel like he’s actually in danger. I actually believe the two of them together could get some really incredible stuff done.

What I’m saying is that with Huey’s help Gus could absolutely complete his tunnels under Hexside.

Dewey and King Now this, this is the pair who would go incredibly well together, at the detriment of literally everyone around them. If there is one person King “I Will Rule Everything” Clawthorne should not be exposed to its Dewey Duck. Within minutes of meeting each other the two of them would immediately have so many bad ideas. Between Dewey’s insistence on being the best and most daring adventurer while putting his name on everything and going down in history & King’s trying to rule everything and everyone, the attempts to raise the stakes would be constant and the two would spend literal hours endlessly trying to one-up each other. All in one day they search for legendary treasure, discover an entirely new civilization, try to take over said civilization, create a new species just to name it after themselves, and build statues of themselves in the middle of Bonesbourough. And that’s all before lunch.

Louie Here it is. The one I waited till the very end for out of sheer excitement. I even kept the second name out of the heading thing. That’s how secretive I’m trying to be about this. See, there’s one character in the owl house that works so well with Louie it’s practically canon. Their interactions have so much potential, they each bring so much to the table, I just couldn’t Not talk about it. And yeah, I know this ask was specifically asking about the owl house and ducktales kids, but I just couldn’t resist talking about the relationship between Louie and Eda.

A con artist from another world who was so successful she became nationally famous? There’s no way Louie would pass up an opportunity like that. For his part I wouldn’t be surprised if he’s already managed to set up another underworld identity in the boiling aisles, or at the very least that Eda could totally have been to the ducktales realm and heard of his one there.

Either way I’m convinced the two of them would start planning a heist as soon as they figure out who each other are. Eda is a little prideful and wants to show this kid he can’t out-con her, but Louie knows what he’s doing just as much. Honestly with the two of them combined Eda wouldn’t have to worry about losing her stand for a long time. Over the course of their planning and seeing Louie in action Eda begrudgingly gains some respect for the  kid, and while Louie was definitely just using her as a learning/profit opportunity at first, he’s pretty susceptible to getting attached.

For Louie, it’s the fact that she actually respects him for being good at what he does. Even back with his family who all love and care about him and all that he still feels like most of them don’t really get what he does or see what’s special about him, so having someone who made a whole life of it be even a little proud of him feels really nice.

And of course, at the end of their heist when they finally have the money in hand, and Eda just casually hands over his half, he stares at her like she’s crazy.

“You’re just.. Giving it to me?!”

“Well, yeah. That was the deal wasn’t it kid? I mean if you really want I definitely have a few ideas for it.”

“No! Uh, no, thanks, I’ll keep it. It’s just that you really remind me of someone, I guess I was expecting something else.”

[obeymebabes]

For the small fix requests could I ask for something with Barbatos/reader baking? Perhaps making/decorating a gingerbread house? Just something fluffy please? Thanks.

Sweet Treats (Barbatos x MC holiday fic)

A/N: This request lowkey highkey made me cry because all I wanted this year was to build a gingerbread house and I didn’t get to. Barb is also my favorite boy, so thank you anon for literally giving me an excuse to write a comfort fic. I love you. This is also longer than expected so not quite a minific. Sorry not sorry.

Warnings: Tooth rotting (literally) fluff!

Summary: Barbatos wants your help with baking, and things get a teensy bit out of hand.

~

While the demons of Devildom aren’t typically ones to celebrate Christmas, with you there, Diavolo had an excuse to go all out. He wanted to make sure it was the most extravagant Christmas you’d ever experienced in your life. Christmas spirit in mind, he tasked Barbatos to make some holiday sweets.

While Barbatos didn’t exactly need the help, he wanted your opinions on the tastes, well, that and he wanted an excuse to have you around him. You had both spent the day in the kitchen, helping him with little tasks while he worked on making sure the cookies were absolutely perfect. Which they were, of course. Barbatos isn’t known as the best baker in all of the three realms for no reason. But something was missing. Even with tons of festive cookies, it didn’t feel right. 

As he was fumbling through a human world holiday recipe book, an idea came to mind. The answer to his question. With a grin, his dashing green eyes found yours.

“How would you like to help me make a gingerbread house? Not just any gingerbread house. I would like to try to make a replica of the Demon Lord’s castle. It will be quite a bit of work, but I believe if we get an early start, we may be able to finish in time for the big day.” The butler patiently waited as you thought over your answer. 

On one hand, it will be a lot of work. But on the other hand, it’s Barbatos. If anyone can pull off such a feat, it would be him. It also gives you more time to be with him, something you don’t get to do very often due to his busy schedule serving the prince.

“I would love to help.” A soft smile formed on the demon’s face upon hearing your words. “Splendid. I will get started on making the gingerbread, will you be able to handle gathering various candy and decoration items for the outside?” 

The sparkle in his eyes made your heart melt. He was so happy to have you helping him. Seeing Barbatos in his most comfortable and most relaxed state was something you’d never known you needed. But the content look on his face as he read through the recipe and mixed ingredients was a sight to behold. This was the calmest you had ever seen him. He was truly in his element.

After you had collected the candy, and he had finished baking the gingerbread, it was time for him to make the icing to hold this masterpiece together.

“This is the best sugar in all of the three realms. It is from the Celestial Realm, and is known to be the sweetest. Although I admit, you may be able to top that.” Barbatos watched as a faint blush appeared on your cheeks. With a bit of a smile, he stuck his finger in the powdery substance and quickly tapped your nose with it, getting it on your face. “There, now you are officially the sweetest thing here in Devildom.” 

Looking at him without wiping the sugar from your nose, you did the same to him, only instead of getting it on his nose, you managed to get it on both of his cheeks. The battle to get as much sugar on each other as possible continued for a short while. You both managed to get it in your hair, all over your clothes, on the counter, the floor, everywhere except the bowl it was supposed to be in. 

Diavolo, hearing the ruckus, stopped by to check and see how everything had been going. Standing at the door quietly and watching you both mess around like children, a wide grin had been plastered on his face. It had been the first time in a long time that he had seen Barbatos so cheerful and carefree with someone before. 

Just as Barbatos had captured you in a hug, both of you a laughing mess, literally, he had noticed Lord Diavolo at the door. He quickly jumped up and blushed at the mess you both had created with the sugar.

“My Lord, I am sorry, it appears we got a bit… sidetracked. I will get it all cleaned up-” The prince laughed a bit and shook his head and cut off the butler before he could continue. “Barb, please, don’t worry about it. There is no rush. I see you both are quite busy, so I will leave you be.” The prince chucked a bit over his own words as he swiftly exited the scene, leaving you and your sweet mess with the butler to remain. 

The next few hours, with the both of you still coated in sugar, you both worked to get a majority of the gingerbread castle finished. Along the way, there were a few hiccups, like your temporary break to smear icing on Barb’s face and vise versa, or the few minutes he took to blindly feed you candy to see if you were able to guess correctly.

It was one of the best times you had ever had. Barbatos could happily say the same. He would be looking forward to asking you to help him in the kitchen more often, in the hopes that you both could have more entertaining memories together. 

Who knew making a gingerbread castle with a demon butler would be so much fun?

~

[thejudgingtrash]

Can you explain to me how Rachel was annoying in the series?

Well, I’ll try to keep myself short for this one (lol no, this took an hour to write). Also, let’s not forget that they’re all kids, but I’m basing this off from when I read the series as a fourteen year old because my opinions haven’t changed much (for better or for worse).

I’m not the biggest fan of Rachel. I have to admit that portrayals of her by Simi, Kit, Logan, Apollo and all the others helped to shape her into something cooler than what she had been in my foggy memories but I actually went back to take a look in the books (well, TTC + BOTL so far) to refreshen my mind about events that have happened.

Also, you should browse through @blackjacktheboss's blog as she’s a) hilarious and b) says whatever I say in like a single sentence lol. But your ask is about me and my opinions so here we go:

What I didn’t like about Rachel was that she’s rude and bold (DON’T GET ME WRONG, I love that in female characters!!!), but she doesn’t have Annabeth’s excuse of survival of the fittest (literally running off as a traumatized seven year old) and introducing us into the world of the Riordanverse.

Percy was on his way, had shit to deal with and Rachel pretty much interrupted him from the get-go and thought getting her answers was more important than letting Percy just rush forward. Yes, this is Rachel’s entrance into the series and the net Riordan threw into the sea, to make us little fish adapt to her. But it still didn’t sit right with me, probably because I would never interact that way.

I get why she did that, but it’s the way how she did it that’s just making me go ???

Even if I was seeing weird things, I wouldn’t set out to distract/interrupt someone who is incredibly busy to get my way. Rachel’s dick move seems like a Karen boomer type of thing to pull off, but guess that’s up to you.

If I were her, I’d either film/try to photograph the monsters via phone (if that’s possible) or internet stalk enough to find the other person (note: despite Riordan’s stupid rule of not being able to use phones, demigods still can use computers/the internet, I guess). Percy was national news like a year or two ago in the timeline, so it shouldn’t be that difficult to find more stuff out about him, even in like 2008 or so. Let him have a spot on Perez Hilton's shitty gossip blog, for the OGs reading this.

Annabeth was used as a tool of exposition to introduce us to CHB, the demigod life and how things roll around there. She barged into Percy’s mission as a nuisance first but a necessity second in TLT.

However, in comparison to Rachel, Annabeth was transformed into a fully-fledged protagonist within a span of a chapter or two. Rachel needed another separate book after her first appearance, so we don’t just know Annabeth better, we know that she’s an important constant throughout the story as of Rachel seems… almost random? Is she truly necessary as a character?

This doesn’t come from a shipper perspective, this is coming from a character design perspective and adds to the feeling that the way she has been introduced to me as a reader just seems off.

Yes, BOTL makes sense with her as a reborn Ariadne, but technically Sally could’ve done the job as she’s a clear-sighted mortal as well lol. Then again, Sally is an adult, went to college, had a job, was unfortunately probably working it up with Paul, did the cha cha slide with him and had overall better shit to do.

Then Rachel as the oracle, which is just super weird in general. Wasn’t Apollo himself responsible for issuing prophecies in the OG myths? Or did he both, have the oracle of Delphi as his spokesperson and issue important stuff to Team Olympus? Am I mixing things up? I’m getting sidetracked, my bad.

Either way, this oracle gig might be the only time I’d say Rachel might be important in the future (badum tzz), but Riordan fumbled the bag in the follow ups series so there’s that. Did she even appear in HOO? Can’t remember and also don’t care.

Rachel is used as one out of three choices in regard to his love life that Percy can make. Calypso literally got introduced into BOTL and was admittedly Percy’s biggest what if… But the general gist doesn’t sit right with me. We have three possible routes with Percy and the others:

Rachel: somewhat normality in the mortal realm

Annabeth: the danger and thrill of the demigod life

Calypso: ambrosia and nectar. a hint of immortality

(On one hand, literally why but on the other hand, mad props for Percy who has literally three romantic leads in the same book.) I’d cancel one of them at least out and since Annabeth isn’t going anywhere, I’m taking Rachel. Sally could literally been Percy’s anchor to a normal mortal life as she had intended until it didn’t work out anymore when he became twelve and his monster alerting scent grew stronger.

Calypso and Annabeth would’ve been the perfect opposites where each of them had a strong case. The demigod life within the realms or mortal or the demigod life ascending to Olympus/immortality. Sounds cooler and is way simpler. Three people is way too much, this truly feels like a shonen anime harem thing and it’s defo not my cup of tea (and while some Annabeth sideships aren’t my thing (Lukabeth go cry in the corner, no one likes you, WTF, Connabeth you fugly), it’s super unfair that Annabeth solely has Percy (fuck off Luke) to rely on in regards of romantic endeavors).

Rachel almost feels redundant? The option to walk away from all of that… which isn’t really true as Rachel really tries to push and insert herself into the story the very first time we meet her? But that’s just me, I’m certain that others are saying they’d kill off Annabeth or kick Calypso (I mean yeah) into the curb.

Big ALSO:

Why does Percy need another white and uber-rich love interest?

I semi-joked on Dez’ post (@sawasawako) with this response about Annabeth needing to keep up with powerful Rachel, but the core still stands.

We already have an affluent Annabeth (granted, we don’t know exactly how the Chase’s riches are divided, whereas it’s clear that Rachel can just make anyone drop dead by saying who she is. Annabeth needed that weird lotus casino credit card to make that happen, so Miss Harvard Legacy doesn’t wield that Dare schmoney. Also don’t think Annabeth can just up papa’s money and go…? Idk).

Why do we need another person needing to upstage this?

Like Rachel has to triumph in regards to standard and prestige as if it were a badly written Jane Austen AU. For what reason…? Why not make Percy friends and acquaintances with someone who comes from a normal household for once, not super rich brats (Piper, Annabeth, Rachel, technically the Graces with their TV starlet mother amongst others).

Moreover…

Important question: why should Percy actually be impressed/attracted to that? He’s dirt poor and has been sent to (boarding) schools filled with stupid rich people since he’s been twelve, probably even younger than that. As if that’s the very first thing Percy would look out for or be wowed or something. He’s used to rich douchebags. I think he’s more surprised that someone used their money for his benefit for once and not to crash daddy’s new Mercedes again.

Like seriously… Rachel did that weird art project thing in BOTL with her covered in gold and posing like it’s a super normal thing to do? Even for rich snobbish kids standards? That sounds weird to me. I don’t know, maybe Riordan’s been streaming the new Gossip Girl reboot on HBO Max on repeat and thought this girl is on fiyah (performed by Alicia Keys).

Rachel trying to separate herself from her money just comes off as super hypocritical when she’s using the very same funds to finance her lifestyle. I get it, trying to make amends and make a difference with the damage you have done but... your father still doesn't give a shit about the environment or YOU, sweetie. Kick him in the balls for once! Then you can go out about your art projects.

The concept of Percy having friends in the mortal realm is cool, but why does Rachel almost have to compete with Annabeth with her wealth and art stuff?

No seriously, the comparisons are constantly there, out and about. Roaming freely on the finest grass, needing to be feed delicious locally sourced carrots and stuff.

Annabeth is Athena’s kid. Athena is the goddess of wisdom, weaving, justice, warfare yada yada and arts and crafts. So definitely something which would affect Rachel, right (someone write that Athena messing with Rachel because she can AU and tag me please!)?

Annabeth wants to become an architect which translates to fancy building designer who is driving engineers like Leonardo Eugenio Valdez Cortes insane irl because the maths and physics don't work like that in the working field trust me I'm an engineer, which could/should be considered an art form.

They even shared some common ground while talking about architecture and design in BOTL!

Furthermore, they both share broken homes with absent parents (granted that all demigods go through that). Wealthy families at that as well. Shitty fathers that don’t care about their daughters well-being. Rachel however, is super powerful and influential in an unseen level in the mortal world. She isn’t like Matt Sloan (?) who truly messes up by destroying shit to get his father's attention, but she’s still in that circle and can easily demonstrate that. Making deals with her father and what not. We rarely see Annabeth doing that. Did y’all forget the fucking helicopter Rachel brought along in TLO?

Pan saying Rachel is just as important as her father has multiple meanings to me…

(Sidenote: I do think it’s hilarious that Annabeth is jealous/annoyed of Rachel that her remarks were she’s cute right and Percy went??? Or when Tyson said Rachel’s pretty? Or that time when Annabeth actually defended Luke and his weird behavior (because Kronos was slowly taking over, don’t forget that kids!), because f that rich artist nepotism kid that Rachel seems to be, right?)

Another note: Percy thinks Rachel is annoying in BOTL for a while and it took a while for him to admit that and he spent way more time being annoyed/jealous (for once, Lordy) at Luke for him to even notice lol.

I guess it’s really hard for me to exactly pinpoint what’s bothering me. I believe Rachel's persona just doesn’t seem to hit right, because it feels like a knock-off Annabeth who just simply isn’t a demigod, yet has two cool powers, but in even richer who still needs to be part of the story for exactly what reason?

The jumping around from the richest in the series to the poorest in the series is kinda bothering me as if the middle class doesn’t exist, like I’ve stated earlier. Why didn’t Riordan mix it up with Rachel, giving her more nuance the minute they met, not towards the end? Have her be Percy’s platonic friend from the get go. No weird oh wait she is kinda cute in the middle bullshit.

This kinda drifted more into a Perachel vs Percabeth essay, which really wasn’t my intention. Don’t worry kids, I’m criticizing Annabeth (and her stans) enough already.

And I do think that others in the fandom have softened my views on Rachel as a person like I’ve stated in the beginning. So friendship!Perachel is popping! But I do think that there are some valid points that I’ve made.

Also not gonna lie, Rachel issuing the new prophecy in TLO kinda dampened the end of PJO series but that’s more Riordan’s fault than hers.

TLDR: I’m just not a huge fan of this overbearing, uber-rich, excessively flaunting being that Rachel sometimes displays. She’s flawed, she’s broken at times, has a semi-interesting background story (although it has been done over and over again throughout the series and should be changed up for once) which is great, but it is still annoying.

We don’t need an anti-Annabeth who feels like a weird caricature of the real Annabeth.

Also if this seems super incoherent, repetitive, or whatever, I'm sorry, massive headaches + mental health going down the goo lagoon does this to ya, I hope I made somewhat sense!

[saeyoungchoismaid]

Cooking with Da Masta

Pairing: Solomon x gn!reader Genre: fluff Warnings: none  Summary: you give Solomon the cooking lessons he desperately needs  Word Count: 1.3k words A/N: Happy birthday Solomon and sorry that this is late!! Also sorry this is garbage. I just wanted to write a little something for the handsome sorcerer ᵘʷᵘ 

“(Y/n), please help him! He keeps trying to make us meals and I’m running out of excuses!” Luke cries to you, grasping your hands in his. You stare at him for a moment before turning to look at Simeon. 

“He’s not wrong. His cooking is atrocious but we don’t want to be rude,” Simeon says calmly, further explaining the situation. At get-togethers, you’ve been a witness to others eating Solomon’s cooking and then being warned not to even touch the foul substance without the cook knowing. You feel bad for the cute sorcerer. He always seems so happy and proud of his cooking that no one ever wants to let him down. 

“We’ve tried to offer cooking lessons but he doesn’t think he needs them! Please help us!” Luke pleads. You raise your brow at this, looking between the two angels. 

“If he turned you down, what makes you think he’ll agree to cook with me?” you ask curiously, not understanding. The two males share a look before looking back at you. 

“We just have a hunch,” Simeon supplies with a cool smile. You look over his shoulder to find the white-haired male walking towards your group. 

“Hey, guys. Hi, (Y/n),” he greets, coming to stand next to you. “What are we talking about?” Before you or Simeon can smoothly come up with a lie or avoid the question, Luke blurts out the worst thing to possibly say right now. 

“We definitely aren’t talking about your cooking or anything like that!” Yeah, Luke isn’t very good at—well, anything when he’s under pressure. You and Simeon both let out a soft sigh, hoping Solomon won’t think too much about it. 

To your surprise, he starts to smile brighter than before. Awe, you really do love that smile. “Really? Well, I am a master chef after all. What dish were you talking about? How about the cake I made you last week? That was so good! I should make it again!” 

“No!” Luke is quick to say before realizing his mistake. “Not by yourself, at least. I was just telling (Y/n) that I want to try one of their cakes. Why don’t you two make one together?” Wow, that was actually pretty smooth. Well, the first part wasn’t but he made up for it in the end. 

“Oh,” Solomon says softly, turning to look at you, “do you want to?” You smile at the offer and nod your head, glad that their plan is going smoothly. 

“Yeah, that’ll be fun!” you reply, watching his smile stretch out farther. 

“I think so too. How about I walk you to your next class and we can talk about what cake we should make?” he offers, making you nod again. As you two walk off, the two angels share a knowing look with each other before they both head towards their next class. 

You two decided to make two different cakes. One cake will be for Luke, Simeon, Barbatos, and Lord Diavolo to share. The other cake will be for the brothers to share. You two headed to the store after school to pick up ingredients, deciding at the store that you’ll make the first four a red velvet cake and the brothers a double-layered cake consisting of chocolate and vanilla. 

When you arrive at the House of Lamentation, you get right to work. Almost instantly, you see what the problem is. 

Solomon doesn’t read the instructions and just guesses how much and what to put in. 

“Solomon, maybe we should look at the directions. We want it to turn out perfect, right?” you offer lightly, hoping he won’t take offense. He pauses from putting paprika into your mixing bowl, turning to look at you. 

“Oh, okay,” he agrees after a moment, putting the paprika down onto the counter. You let out a breath that you didn’t know you were holding and grab the red velvet directions, starting to read the ingredients. Your breath hitches for a second when Solomon comes up behind you to read over your shoulder, his body so close to yours that you can feel his warmth. 

“That’s what goes into a cake? Weird,” he comments after you both have finished reading the box. This makes you giggle, your hand coming up to cover your mouth. You turn around and find that he’s still very much so in your space, a pink color starting to dust his cheeks. 

You sidestep him to get the milk out of the fridge. “Alright, start by adding the flour, cocoa powder, baking soda, and salt in one bowl and sift it together,” you command, starting to work on your other bowl. He nods his head and does as told, his tongue sticking out a bit as he focuses on his work. You smile warmly at the sight before catching yourself and getting back to work. 

You two go through everything step by step, getting the first cake in the oven in no time. “Teamwork makes the dream work,” he says playfully as you slide the cake in. You hum in agreement as you close the oven and set a timer. 

“You only bake it for thirty-five to forty minutes? I always thought it would need more time to bake,” he comments as he watches you set the timer. You snort to yourself before starting to work on the next cake. This one took a little more preparation but it was overall pretty much the same process. 

While the cakes were baking, you both started to work on the frosting. You two kept getting sidetracked though. It started with someone throwing a little flour at the other. You can’t remember who started it but all you know is that it meant war and you planned on finishing it. 

After your flour war, which you won, by the way, you two got back to work and made the frosting. Someone, once again, started a war and it went on for a bit. By the end, you two had frosting all over yourselves and the kitchen. You two also ended up standing very close together. You make eye contact with him, feeling your heart start to race more. 

His breath airs across your face from how close you two are, it smelling sweet like the frosting he’s been secretly eating. You’re probably just as sweet smelling as he is. Before you two can stop yourselves, you start leaning in towards each other. Your lips just barely ghost together when the timer goes off. 

You two jump away from the other as if you’ve been caught stealing a cookie from the cookie jar. You quickly turn off the timer with a hot face, hurrying to get the first cake from one of the ovens. You set it down to cool before turning to face him once more. 

“We need to make another batch of frosting,” you inform, seeing as how most of it is on you two. Your duo gets back to work and finishes with the second batch by the time the other cake is ready. You both take out the two layers before setting them down to cool as well. Once they’ve cooled off enough, you each take a cake to frost. 

“They look so good, Solomon!” you say excitedly, looking over the cakes one last time to make sure they’re perfect. 

“You look so good,” he responds immediately. You freeze where you stand, trying to let your brain process what he just said. He did say you look good, right? 

You look over at him to find him staring at you with a red face. Okay, so, yeah, he said it. “Um, thank you,” you mumble, feeling your face starting to heat up. You watch him take a deep breath and take a step towards you. 

He brings his hands to your cheeks as he gives you a kiss, your lips barely touching. He doesn’t kiss you long, almost immediately pulling away. “Sorry, I should have asked first,” he whispers, hands still on your cheeks. 

You swallow thickly before speaking, your voice sounding shaky as you say, “I didn’t mind.” He doesn’t hesitate to kiss you again. And again. And then once more just for good measure.

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MASTERLISTS

More with Solomon

Tag List: @mexicanmagick, @animefreak-247, @jungialo​, @fanfictwarrior​, @ohbbobeyme​, @zeldan7​, @otome-otakuwu​, @hyperfixationpastmidnight, @niphredil-14, @gamelovers-posts, @virtualmemmecollector, @collarjessie, @officialdevorak​, @katelynwithpaint​, @buzzybeebee​, and @thesoftkittylexy​ ✦ if you would like to be added or removed, comment or send an ask :)

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[sevenkittensinatrenchcoat]

I Sort of Wrote Something Again

So, I wrote a really sad thing about Bustopher and Mistoffelees and for some reason, my stupid brain came up with an even sadder story:

I created an internal monologue of Jemima seeing Macavity for the first time and figuring out that he’s her father and going into the implications of that. Because it’s a bunch of dark themes from the perspective of an innocent child, the tone is all over the place. Jemima, as I apparently write her, also seems to have some issues focusing, because she gets sidetracked into a bunch of little stories about her friends. I also had to come up with what she was going to call everyone, including having her not really know what to call Demeter. She calls Mistoffelees “Misty” though, so that’s a thing now.

Anyway, there are a few content warnings, though it’s all very vague, because it’s from the perspective of someone who doesn’t really know what she’s talking about. Most of it can be explained in the backstory I have for Macavity and Demeter:

Macavity, like most sociopaths, can be very charming at first and Demeter fell for him. But, he began to show his true colors over time and the relationship became abusive. She decided to leave Macavity after getting pregnant, not wanting a kitten to grow up around him. But, because she’s Macavity’s daughter, even if she’s nothing like him, Demeter was never entirely comfortable with Jemima and mostly let her be raised by other cats. It didn’t help that when she was finally beginning to recover, Macavity kidnapped her.

So, there are references to sexual assault, domestic abuse, and the fact that Macavity attacks two of the kittens before his fight with Munkustrap, along with a kitten having something of an identity crisis. There’s also a reference to Victoria and Plato having sex this one time, but I’m not sure if that needs a warning as anything other than maybe a little weird in context.

Okay, without further ado:

Scared of Me: Jemima to Macavity

There’s something different about you. I know Miss Jenny is not my mother. I know Mister Skimble is not my father. We don’t look the same. I spent a lot of time with them whenever they camp out in the junkyard and they treat me like their kitten, but they’ve never claimed to be my parents and I’ve never tried to call them Mother and Father. I wonder what would happen if I did.

I look like Aunt Bomba and Aunt Demeter who live in my house. When I call her Aunt, Demeter looks sad. She’s Mother, but she doesn’t want to talk about it. She said that it’s not because she doesn’t want me, but because Father made her sad and she remembers him when she sees me. She said it’s not my fault and that she wanted to spend more time with me, but then she disappeared for a while and no one would tell me where she went. She just got back tonight and she hasn’t said anything to me yet.

But now I look at you. You don’t look at me. You don’t see me. That’s good. I don’t want you to. You’re being mean. But, when I see your red, I realize that it’s my red. Aunt Demeter, Mother, doesn’t have very much red. But you’re all red, except for your tummy, which white, just like mine. Aunt Demeter is scared of you, more than everyone else. Are you Father? Are you why Mother won’t look at me? You’re mean enough to have done whatever bad thing made her upset. But why would she have a kitten with someone who was mean and made her sad? Maybe she didn’t want a kitten. Did you? Did you want me, Father? Why did you have to hurt Mother like that?

You know, Victoria, she’s my best friend, she’s mated before, just the one time with Plato while we were all napping, and she says that if you don’t do it right, it hurts. Did you hurt Mother like that? That wasn’t very nice! Maybe it was an accident, but then you would’ve said sorry and Mother wouldn’t be scared of you. I’ve been hurt by accident before. Yesterday, Etcetera stepped on my tail. Uncle Tugger was across the street and she wasn’t looking where she was going. Miss Jelly was more mad about it than I was. I knew it was an accident. We all act silly when Uncle Tugger’s around, especially Etcetera.

If you could hear me, you probably wouldn’t care. I’m sorry. I just thought that if you’re my Father, why couldn’t you be like all the other fathers? My friends all have them. Last moon, I slept over with Electra and Uncle Munkustrap is her father and she tells him all about her day, even the boring parts and he listens to all of it. He must think it’s pretty silly. Grown-up stuff is boring to kittens, so it’s probably the same the other way around. Besides, Pouncival falling down isn’t really a good story, because he falls down all the time. Though, when Pouncival fell down on top of Tumble, so that he fell down too and grabbed onto Plato to keep from falling all the way down, but he just pulled him down with him, and then Etcetera tripped over the pile of toms and also fell down, that was pretty funny.

Etcetera just fell down again. It wasn’t an accident this time. Why did you do that, Father? She wasn’t doing anything bad, and even if she was, grown-ups aren’t supposed to hit kittens. Mister Skimble says that adults who hit kittens deserve to be hit themselves. I hope he hits you, though I know that isn’t a very nice thing to hope. Since you grabbed Aunt Demeter and tried to take her away somewhere, I think Uncle Munkustrap is going to hit you now, which is probably a good thing. You’re not gonna hurt Mother ever again.

It’s really not fair, Father. You’re bad, so I don’t get to have a father like the other kits do, and you made Mother so sad that I don’t get to have a mother either! That’s why Miss Jenny and Miss Jelly and Mister Skimble and Uncle Munkustrap let me stay with them so much. I’m kind of like an orphan, I think, even though none of my parents are dead.

And you don’t want me either. You didn’t try to take me away. I don’t want to be taken away and if you tried, I would definitely bite you, but I’d also know that you wanted me. If you didn’t want to have a kitten, why did you mate with Aunt Demeter in the first place? Victoria says that you can sometimes just mate for fun, but I don’t think Aunt Demeter was having fun. Uncle Munkustrap says that having fun by making someone else not have fun is bullying. That’s what he said when Rumpleteazer scared Mistoffelees on purpose so he’d blow something up with his magic. Teazer just wanted to see something blow up, but she probably should’ve just asked. Misty probably would’ve said no, but you don’t always get what you want all the time anyway. Bullying can make someone really sad, so I guess that explains what happened to Aunt Demeter.

I finally got to meet my Father today, but you made a very bad first impression. Shouldn’t a first meeting be something happy? All I know is that you hurt my friends and took my Mother away from me and all for no good reason. And you took Old Deuteronomy away, you tricked us, and now you’ve hurt Uncle Munkustrap, too! I hate to think I was made from you. I was made from Aunt Demeter, too, but both parents make the kitten.

I guess I got all of my black and my good parts from Mother and all of my red and bad parts from you. I think I have a bit more black than red, so maybe I have more good than bad, too. I hope so. I don’t think I’m much like you, but I can be bad sometimes, and maybe that’s the part of me that’s like you. But, we’re all bad sometimes, right? Maybe you’re good sometimes, though it can’t be very often. Were you a good kitten, Father? Could a good kitten still become a bad grown-up?

Everyone’s scared of you, Father, but I think it might be worse that because of you, I’m starting to get scared of me.

[bunwritesstuff]

Creepy Crawlies

hello !! this is my first official writing piece for this blog :0 exciting. this is kinda like a test piece to see how i feel posting on here, but i hope yall read it and enjoy either way! fic is under the banner :]

fandom: omori

word count: 1,317

content warning(s): brief mentions of a bug, nothing graphic

characters included: mari, sunny, and aubrey (kel and hero are mentioned but not present)

synopsis: mari, sunny and aubrey are walking to school, and sunny gets distracted by a bug. it gives mari a silly little idea. (small spoiler ->) this is a fic based off when mari admits that she used to put bugs in hero's desk! this is just the first part, i might publish the second part in a post after this !! also i got like halfway through writing this and realized basil is just not there, so say this takes place during a time before basil was properly introduced to the group :]

“Sunny, be careful! You shouldn't touch an icky thing like that!”

Mari was torn from her thoughts at the sound of Aubrey’s distressed squeals a few feet ahead. Pulling her attention to her brother and their friend, Mari noted how Sunny was crouched to the ground, facing her. He must’ve turned back around to get a better look at whatever caught his attention. His expression was drawn into one of interest, mouth slightly agape and eyes widened in awe. There, almost directly under his gaze, was a bug. That's what Mari assumed anyways, it was hard to tell given how far away he and Aubrey were. Aubrey was standing even further back, nose scrunched up in disgust with hands balled into small fists at her sides. It was almost like she was ready for the bug to lunge at Sunny, that way she’d have an excuse to stomp on it. Or something to that degree, anyways.

The older girl quickened her pace a bit to catch up with the kids. Hero and Kel would have normally been walking with them, but when Mari and Sunny showed up at their house to get them, Hero had to inform them that Kel was having stomach issues. He reassured them that they'd catch up later, and that he was going to try and talk his parents into letting Kel just stay home for today. Hero didn't want to risk making everyone late by having them all wait, so he ushered them off. Today it was just Mari, Sunny, and Aubrey. 

It didn’t take long for Mari to slow down in front of Sunny and his newfound fascination, which was in fact, a bug: a beetle of some kind, walking around in almost dizzying circles. It was pretty amusing how interested Sunny was in the creature, as if bugs like this weren’t fairly common. Sunny wasn't a very expressive kid, so moments where he managed to convey clearly how he was feeling were wonderful, whether it was intentional or not.

“Is everything okay?” Mari asked, her tone gentle as she brought her gaze up from Sunny and the beetle to the shorter girl in pink.

“It… it's so big and ugly! Sunny’s sitting so close to it, what if it bites him or something? He could get hurt!” Aubrey immediately expressed, bouncing on her toes to get some of her concerned and worked up energy out. The brunette was never one to really hold back how she was feeling, it was honestly pretty admirable of her to be able to get it all out. Then again, It would be pretty easy to envy an elementary schooler for their lack of filter, wouldn’t it? 

“You make some very compelling points, Aubrey,” Mari started, shooting the younger a soft smile as she knelt down across from Sunny. “However, I don’t think this bug is very big, ugly, or aggressive. If it was an aggressive bug, surely it would’ve tried to attack us by now, don’t you think?”

The silence that followed was enough to answer that question.

“While you may think this bug is big and scary, could you imagine being this little guy? We must be even bigger, louder creatures.”

“Well, yeah! But…”

“But?”

“I…” Aubrey brought her bouncing to a slow stop as she took in Mari’s words. With some hesitance, she took a few steps forward, peeking over Sunny’s shoulder to get a better look at the beetle. Just as Mari said, it was much smaller than she initially made it out to be, and it hadn’t made any moves to attack. It was just a little guy taking a buggy stroll. Aubrey felt her fists begin to unclench as she relaxed, and eventually let out a quiet sigh. “I guess it isn’t so bad… it’s kinda cute, actually.” 

The other girls in her class would’ve screamed and made a fuss like she did, so she wondered why Mari didn’t react that way. Mari always knew just the right things to say, always so calm and collected. It was something Aubrey really liked about her. With her and Sunny both more curious about the bug rather than fearing it, it helped sway Aubrey’s opinion on it to be a more positive one. From the corner of her eye, she saw Mari starting to stand up, brushing off her skirt.

“I agree! It is pretty cute. But if this is settled, what do you say we finish making our way to school, okay? If you guys make it in time, you might be able to have a few minutes of free time before class starts.”

At the idea of having some extra free time, Aubrey perked back up and nodded eagerly. “Okay, Mari!” Leaning down a little, she put her hand on Sunny’s shoulder to get his attention. “C’mon, Sunny! We’ve gotta get going!”

It took a moment, but Sunny quietly stood up at the second reminder. He took one last moment to watch the beetle before stepping back from it and looked up at Mari and Aubrey. Aubrey took her hand off of his shoulder and instead reached down to take his hand, hoping he didn’t mind. He didn't offer much of a reaction, so she decided she was in the clear. “C’mon!” She giggled again, turning around and starting to pull him along with her down the sidewalk. 

“Don’t go too far ahead without me,” Mari reminded the kids as they started to wander off, but the request fell upon ears that were not listening anymore. Ah, well… at least she could still see them. Not that Mari didn’t trust them, Aubrey knew better than to go too far, and if Sunny felt unsafe he’d turn around and come back to Mari. Everything would be okay. Despite this, Mari still wished that Hero were here. He always knew how to keep everyone in the group together. He could get through to Aubrey in a way that not even Mari seemed to be able to, even if he doubted that he could.

Mari adjusted the straps of her backpack and was about to start walking again when that silly beetle caught her attention once again. With Hero on her mind, she was reminded of how bugs made him squeamish. If he and Kel were here, and the group got sidetracked by this beetle, Hero would be quite a ways ahead of the group, not wanting to give the little guy a second glance. The association bridging this bug to Hero did leave Mari to wonder: would it be mean to play a small, harmless prank on him?

Was it cruel of her to even consider pulling a prank on her friend? To lean back down, quickly scoop up the beetle, and tuck it away in her sweatshirt pocket? Was it cruel that she was kind of looking forward to Hero’s expression going from confusion, to processing, to fear all within the same moment? Well, maybe it was! He didn’t have to know it was her who did it, after all. It’ll just be her little secret. She wouldn’t do it every day, that’d be too sudden and suspicious! But every now and then wouldn’t hurt, right? 

His fear of bugs was understandable, but surely he’d grow out of it eventually. They were already in middle school after all! Most kids grew out of their bug fearing phase by then, didn't they? Mari decided that having to face an occasional bug would help him overcome his fear… right? Well, she wasn’t sure it would definitely work, but until it either worked or she got bored of doing it, his reactions would surely be priceless.

With that in mind, and her hand still in her pocket to keep the beetle from escaping, she hurried along to try and catch up with Aubrey and Sunny. This morning would surely be an interesting one.

part 1/2 (end)

[baebeyza]

What is a plot hole or subplot in any Transformers show/series that you dislike/hate? Have a nice day! Ps: I love your art!

Thank you! <3

Okay, lets see...PS: I love most of these shows with all my heart, if I don’t I’ll say it. So don’t take me criticizing some aspects of them as me hating them, some of these don’t even bother me much and I find them hilarious instead :>

G1: This show is full of plot holes and that is part of the charm, however, I could have lived without Optimus coming back, ruined everything my boy Roddy went through before. 

Headmasters:  I love Sixshot’s “redemption” (I wouldn’t call it redemption really, more a heel-face turn) but the decision to take this character whose been written as a merciless killer with an on-screen death count of 3, including beloved baby Ultra Magnus, and giving him depth in the last 4 episodes was a truly bold move xD Personally, I think they handled it well enough, but I don’t know how other people feel about it - if you watched Headmasters PLEASE LET ME KNOW YOUR OPINION! Super-God Masterforce: Hmmm, I mean there are things that aren’t so sweet when you watch the show, like the slow pacing in the first half, but looking at the story as a whole it doesn’t matter much. Said slow pacing makes sense when you think about it.  So for this show, I don’t have complaints, I love it and love the plot! <3 Victory: There was a story to be told between Deszaras and Leozack, Leozack and Hellbat and between Greatshot and Guyhawk, but these arcs just faded out without conclusion.   I explained my grievance better in this post! Beast Wars: I love Beast Wars but I hate the love triangle with Blackarachnia and Silverbolt and the teenage third wheel Cheetor. So annoying 🙄 Beast Wars II: Kind of a bummer to me that Megastorm just kinda turned pathetic towards the end instead of being a threat with more evil methods than Galvatron as he was introduced to be. I mean the idea of him being more evil and serious without Galvs around and being a suck-up annoying lil brother with Galvs around was nice, but I would have liked to see more of his advertised evil methods.  Beast Machines:  I hate the way they handled Jetstorm and Silverbolt, they could have written that far better.  Here a post explaining it! Robots in Disguise 2001/Car Robots: The most hilarious thing in this show’s writing is that in the first episode Yuki’s father gets kidnapped and Optimus is like “We’ll save him!” Then they don’t save him and it takes around 30 episodes for the father to be rescued by fucking SKY-BYTE xD Armada/Micron Densetsu: The show I enjoyed the least and don’t even really like: I liked the ideas with Optimus, Megs and Starscream, liked the conclusions, but the build-up to them all was so boring, confusing and unnatural that I couldn’t feel for it.  The characters, their interactions and conflicts are nonsensical most of the time and contrived as well, it just ruined the experience. This whole show would need an overhaul from the very start to give it justice to the good ideas it had. Energon/Superlink: This show isn’t better than Armada when it comes to good ideas and lazy writing, but unlike Armada, it was fun to watch and had its characters act like people- And while character arcs were just stopped out of nowhere as well, at least it happened via death xD Inferno’s arc stopping was sad, but at least his death scene was nice.  If there is one thing I was a little sad about then it is Mirage not having an important place within the Cons as Starscream had. I would have thought both him and Star would be the serious ones and flank Megs on both sides, but nah, he’s in a dumbass trio with Demolishor and Snow Cat in the end. 😔 And while I celebrate his canon crush on Megs, it would have been nice to see Megs acknowledging it.  Cybertron/Galaxy Force: This was an awesome show, but as a Decepticon and Megatron lover, I was disappointed. Megatron was boring as an evil leader! The only person he had any interesting dynamic with is Starscream, and even that fell short. He didn’t care about any other Decepticon. And I don’t mean it in a “he’s bad boss” kinda way, he just doesn’t care. Decepticons join and leave without him ever reacting to it. I don’t think he spoke a word with Demolishor.  I would have thought he and Flame Convoy would develop something awesome, but even with that guy, nothing meaningful happens between them.  I know this is a story about friendship and you gotta show the villain as being friendless, but even that could have been showcased instead of just not bothering to write the dude. Animated: One thing I find sad is that Blackarachnia has nothing to do with the rest of the Decepticons. Megatron never even asked about her. And it is sad because she joined them because they accepted her while the Autobots would have not and that was interesting! But nothing gets revealed. Prime: Breakdown dying was a real bummer, because they had implied for him to get more development. Robots in Disguise 2015: The one grievance I have is the problem of characters never developing and going through the same lesson all over again. Also, Steeljaw being the best thing the show has as a main villain, but just getting sidetracked the whole time. Prime Wars Trilogy: I like the plot of Prime Wars, the storytelling, in general, is lacklustre though. Starscream could have had something better than just trying to take power and failing immediately. Cyberverse: I find Cybeverse to be boring and a thing I hated is how in season 3 they have Kup telling the story to the audience for the last four episodes of the Quintesson arc. It took away any kind of dread you could have felt for the story because Kup being able to tell it means that all goes well.  Which, yeah, of course it’ll go well, but Kup reassuring me the whole time that all will go well the whole time was just annoying.  Imagine watching an intense action flick where the characters are in mortal danger, but the action gets interrupted the whole time by some random character just to be like “this was intense, but don’t worry, we gonna survive :)” Makes it impossible to get invested in the drama! War for Cybertron: Not done yet I know, but while I celebrate this show and like it a lot, I am miffed about the lack of backstory to the conflict and characters. Siege should have been a second season with a season one that explains how it got to the point they are in Siege.

[chaoticspacefam]

Kiss With A Fist

A/N:

quite literally heeheheh ok I’ll see myself out LMAO the rest of this song doesn’t literally apply to these two, they love each other very much and rest assured they’d never actually, deliberately hurt each other. it’s more the general Vibe(tm) of the song that fits their courting process + I really liked the poetic irony of this line used as the quote & the last line of the fic XD Also bear in mind this is from D’leah’s POV and yes, it is semi-ironic on purpose because...it’s D’leah. Any regulars on the blog should be very familiar with mama Sith’s propsensity to be a bully with an overinflated ego at this point *shrugs* XD

OKAY, with that out of the way, here we go! A little oneshot. I haven’t sat down to properly write or edit for a good long while, but this is still one of my favourite oneshots that I’ve ever written tbh, so...enjoy! 😄😄 I’ll leave it up to reader interpretation as to whether they actually finished the mission her brother & dad sent them out on or got sidetracked(tm) 👀😉

I don’t think it needs a particular warning since it’s literally one sentence but there is a mention of killing an assassin in the middle of this (under the cut) so ig be aware of that. It’s not horribly graphic so should be fine but uhhh, just in case?

                                ----------------------------

“A kick in the teeth is good for some, but a kiss with a fist is better than none!” ~Florence & the Machine

Of all the Royal Guards that could have possibly been assigned to accompany her on this mission, it had to be this one. The heiress would be lying if she said she wasn't a tad bitter by the Emperor's insistence on that arrangement; she'd attempted to change his mind in a moment of desperation in the past, but her father would hear nothing of it, patting her on the shoulder and claiming that none of the others had the skill level for this sort of task, or to keep up with her during it. So, once more, she was resigned to the company of the fool who, despite her snapping, always seemed to turn up when he was least wanted and needed. 

(This was, of course, not the case and given that his entire purpose was to protect the heiress from threats, perhaps she should have been more tolerant of his presence, or perhaps her protests stemmed less from annoyance and more from something else than she was willing to admit…)

 And he had been fraying D'leah's nerves ever since they'd landed on Tatooine this morning. Kissai had enough arrogance for the both of them, and he seemed to have gotten the idea into his head that she couldn't take care of herself without him needing to jump in to "rescue" her at the most inopportune moment. It was infuriating. She did not need him charging in to help, she could handle herself just fine.

Everything about this man irritated her to no end: the way he stomped around with his great big feet and woke half the karkin’ planet, his habit of always being right behind her whenever she turned around, the way he kept grabbing her by the shoulder to pull her back and insist he, of all people, went first; his stupid face and that annoying, oaf-ish smile of his…

She’d been so busy internally cursing her Guard that she’d failed to notice the man who had been tailing them since the spaceport; in fact, she only noticed him in the first place when she heard his spine crack as Kissai lifted him into the air with the Force, then flung the body down in front of her almost pointedly.

D’leah let out an agitated hiss as her amber eyes flicked from the corpse at her feet, to his face as he raised both browstalks at her as if to say "I told you so", then back again, and sputtered.

“He wasn’t going to shoot me.” 

“I think you’ll find he was, princess.” Kissai retorted smoothly, plucking the man’s blaster pistol off the ground and waving it at her as he added, “You’re welcome, by the way.” She bristled faintly at the word ‘princess’. Sometimes when she was in a good mood, she’d slip up and let it slide without correcting him. Today, after the morning she’d had, D’leah was in no mood to put up with it.

“I don’t need you following me around like a lost Tuk’ata pup!” she snapped at him, trudging onwards and praying he’d catch his stomping feet in a sinkhole when he tried to follow her.

“Your father seems to think otherwise.” The man simply laughed the comment off, pulling his hood up to protect his face from the sand that whipped into a vortex around them. His voice dropped an octave, to become a more serious growl. “Are you forgetting that my entire job is to protect you?” 

The Ahaszaai High Lady snarled under her breath, checking the locator beacon Duuma had given her as she ducked into the alcove it indicated. The lost artifact should be around here somewhere…

“I don’t need protecting, I can take care of myself just fine!” 

“Mm, of course, D’leahane, because Sith who can take care of themselves usually almost get decapitated by assassins.” Kissai snorted, though she could practically hear the shit-eating grin in his voice, “I think your father’s right to ask me to accompany you. You’d have died three times today if I hadn’t.”

“GO JUMP IN A SARLACC PIT!” she shouted back at him. 

“And there are the creative insults your brother warned me about.” 

D’leah paused in her search to turn her head and give him a dirty look over her shoulder, intoning menacingly. “I’ll kill him when I see him next.” 

Kissai’s expression moulded into one of concern this time, the red-eyed Pureblood blinking at her uncertainly as he reminded her. “...You don’t know which one it was.”

Now it was her turn to grin at him.

“Don’t need to, I have a fifty-fifty shot.”

“No wonder they’re both afraid of you.” he scoffed, rolling his eyes. Truthfully, the High Lady was doing her best to ignore his obvious needling as she ducked through another archway and moved further into the cave system, the words she threw over her shoulder echoing back to him off the empty passageway’s walls.

“You should be afraid of me, too. I could end you.”

She was surprised he was still behind her, he could move rather fast despite his large frame, it would seem. D’leah tried not to be too impressed by that fact, but if she was being honest...

“Does it bother you that I’m not, princess?” 

He wasn’t going to drop this, was he? She’d been about to levitate a pile of rocks out of their path, but stopped and spun around to glare at him instead.

“Don’t you “princess” me, you...you…” just when she needed it the most, her ability to think of an appropriate insult failed her, and instead she trailed off into awkward silence. Kissai took that as an invitation to make her even more irritated that his wit was quicker than hers, and added, grinning the whole while: “If you’re trying to think of something you haven’t called me yet, we’ll be here for a good century or so.”

“Fool.” she hissed in frustration. He had her on the ropes, now, and that wasn’t somewhere the Ahaszaai heiress was used to being.  “Is that the best one you have? Did I wear you out, my Lord~?” he crooned back at her, and that was when D’leah put her foot down. She flung a few bolts of lightning in his direction for good measure. As she had suspected, his reflexes were as good as his saber skills and he easily deflected them off his palm before the electricity did any damage, swatting them aside into the wall as if he were brushing dust off his cloak.

“I knew you were going to do that, too...do you really think I can’t handle you?” he teased fondly. 

“I’ve no time for oafs the likes of you.” D’leah growled.

"Then tell me to leave you alone." he stared back at her seriously, browstalks furrowing as his gaze slid from hers to focus on the rest of her face, as if searching her expression for a nonverbal cue he might have missed. "At your word, my Lord, you'll not hear another thing from me beyond those necessary for my duty." 

Looking into his eyes in that moment, she was forced to admit the reality that perhaps she didn’t want him to leave her alone. He’d figured out she was testing him, and now he was calling her bluff, the kriffing, good-looking bastard.  Her jaw spurs rattled in annoyance, but D'leah's lips remained sealed. He waited a full minute, still studying her carefully, to give her plenty of opportunity to voice her thoughts. 

She didn't. The corners of Kissai's mouth turned upwards into a faint smile. 

"That's what I thought." he stepped away from her again, but not before slipping up and forgetting his station for long enough to murmur fondly, "Your nose scrunches up when you're sulking, you know. It’s cute."

D'leah could let "princess" slide on a good day, as far as his pet names went it was among those she considered tolerable, but she drew the line at "cute"! Annoyed and frustrated in more ways than one, she strode after him to reach up and grab the taller Pureblood's shoulder to stop him in his tracks. The Guard turned towards her again, a small, confused noise rumbling in his throat.

First she punched him in the jaw, then she kissed him. Hard. And that was the end of that.