#I don’t see my irl friends much bc we are all busy

[bunnywabigheart]

HASAN NSFW HEADCANNON PLS ANYTHING WORKS!!

ask and you SHALL receive!!! i’ve been a longtime hasanabi fan, and I’ve heard WAYYY too much into about this man’s sex life you’ve picked the right person

- you’ve known Hasan since 2020 but you two only started OFFICIALLY AND PUBLICLY dating in like march/april/may 2023

- and if you had KNOWN the dick would be THAT GOOD you DEFINITELY would’ve confessed ur feelings earlier

- you’ll be seeing sex through a WHOLE NEW LENSE

- from dating for maybe like three weeks you already know what makes Hasan “break”

- anytime yall are out with friends? teasing. IRL stream he can’t end abruptly just to fuck you? teasing. halloween? forget it you might as well just wear a bikini because we all know that costumes being ripped APART

- your lowkey obsessed with his hands oh mannn

- and bestie…if ur into cosplay better start running (I remember one time he might’ve said something abt being like addicted to roleplay??? BUT DON’T QUOTE ME ON IT)

- he is going to want to fuck u IN cosplay

- literally thinks you’re the most beautiful thing ever to exist

- tbh you blow all his ex’s AWAYYY (am I projecting…? okay fine I am a little bit lol)

- but fr you really do he looks at you like you created the universe

- and I’m not saying you’ll be “addicted” to his dick bc “addicted” is a strong word but idk

- during his streams you’ll be bursting in and being like “heyyy whatcha doing?”

- trying to watch and engage in whatever he’s watching, trying your best to tease him without getting a TOS violation or banned, etc., etc.

- him trying to shoo you away with a stunlock but then coming to see you during a “pee break”

- y’all spend at least ten minutes going at it

- chat going like “bro is taking a long ass piss 💀”

- comes back sweaty af, hair messy…yeah we all know what happened buddy you can’t fool us

xoxo,

bunny

A/N: I’m so sorry I couldn’t get more requests out I’ve been so busy with school and shit and haven’t been on tumblr or even watching many of Hasan’s streams lately :’( but here’s my present to u ily all see you soon!

[stuckinapril]

hey -- i know you probably dont want anons worrying about you too much because i know at the end of the day what we're doing is doing whatever we can, spreading the word and letting them go unforgotten at least as the bare minimum, to help palestine. but genuinely volunteering fatigue is a very real thing and of course im sure i dont have to tell you to never stop talking about what's going on, never stop thinking about those individual lives lost to the occupation, im sure you understand better than most people. but in regards to your other volunteering work -- oftentimes your best work comes from when you've ensured your own rest first as best you can. im sure its hard with everything going on but try to take care of yourself where you can even if its the little things. youre doing amazing work irl and im sure i speak for a ton of people when i say your constant activism doesnt go unseen. you are making a difference in so many ways. they will be free.

from the river to the sea. 🍉

(no pressure to reply to this and sorry if i overstepped at all. im just an anon online so i dont really know you. i just also volunteer and have a lot going on and i've been thinking constantly about the atrocities against the palestines and how horrifying it is that some people would think it's even remotely okay. i know you wouldnt want the attention put on you so again i totally understand if you dont wanna publish this -- i just want you to know you're doing as much as you can in all aspects of life and im sure many people think your work is a blessing)

🌻

No I really appreciate this!! I do realize I can come off as pretty stilted when I’m answering asks like this, and honestly yeah it does have to do with that I’m uncomfortable w the idea of making this about me. It even took a mental tug of war to answer this lmao, but I don’t wanna just dismiss people who’re being openly kind to me—so thank you. Sincerely.

I can see how a lot of my posts can come off as red flags haha, not w regards to volunteer work but just in general bc I’m very much an overachiever pre-med. And I love it, I wouldn’t do it if I didn’t love medicine and science and being busy, but I do have moments where I’m like I!!! Have not truly been home!!! In a week and a half!!! But I do have ways to destress w that like the gym, a good group of friends, journaling, reading, self-care regimens etc etc.

Really grateful that I’m just some girl on the internet & there are still people who care enough to send worried asks like this!! Love u SO much even if I am bad at expressing it at times

[babycatlix]

hello friends! 💖 and happy new year! i hope 2023 is kind to us all! 

let’s just get into it! at the tail-end of 2021, i wasn’t really sure i was going to stay on tumblr. a lot of the friends i had made on my main and on another side blog had moved on from tumblr/we didn’t talk anymore. the few IRL friends i do have, i don’t follow on here bc i got rid of my old account (c. 2011) so i wasn’t really sure i was going to even be on tumblr during 2022. 

but then... march, 2022, my friend wanted to show me a music video. i wasn’t super jazzed but said “okay.” and he said, “have you heard of stray kids?” and me being into kpop for the better part of 16-ish years i said, “yes, i’ve heard of stray kids. i don’t stan, but i have heard of them.” fast forward a few weeks, he’s made me watch the maniac mv like 10 times and he thinks now is a good time to tell me, “by the way, stray kids is a self-producing group.” in case you didn’t know, i love groups that self-produce. see the other groups i love, bigbang, bts, seventeen, winner and ikon. so as soon as he said that, i was done for. i fell even deeper into kpop and fell into stray kids. 

in april, 2022 i decided that i should make a side blog for stray kids. i didn’t think it would grow into what it has. i just thought it would be like my itzy and blackpink side blogs, where i occasionally post some fan photos and other ppls creations. instead... i thought a good way for me to catch up on 4 years of content was to start giffing and here we are. i say this every time i do a follow forever, but i'm so happy here in my corner of stayblr. everyone is so kind and wonderful! and i want to thank everyone that shows my gifsets love! i'll tag some ppl below, but i want to mention a few special ppl to me first:

@yonglixx and @quokki my lovely sun ☀️ and ale! 💚 we may not talk a whole lot these days, life is busy and school is way too much, but you two were some of the first ppl on stayblr that i really talked to 💖 you guys were my first mutuals 😭🥰

@jinniebit ahhhh anna! we also don't talk a whole lot, but you are special to me! i followed you from your svt main and when i realized that you were here on stayblr, i plucked up my courage (i'm a huge chicken when it comes to interacting first! 🙈) and filled out your mutual form 💖 and i'm so glad i did!

@changbeens wonderful, amazing, talented bee! you mentioned me in your birthday follow forever and i was like, "how have i NOT seen them in my notifs?!" turns out, i was just blind, you were there all along. i love the way you express yourself and you never hesitate to stand up for your friends.

@sunnishine my sunshine 🥰 i'm so glad you were brave one day (i know it took a lot of courage and i'm proud of you 😭) and reblogged one of my gifsets, bc you gave me my own tag and an emoji to go with it 🥺 it was so cute and tbh... i was so nervous to tell you that i wanted a different emoji 😂 but i did and the rest is history.

okay, with the sappy emotional stuff out of the way, here are other ppl that i love a whole lot. if you're not following them, consider doing so! they're all so talented and wonderful! no special order, just alphabetical!

@agibbangs / @atinystraykid / @chanrizard / @chanstopher / @cheekyquokka / @freckledbbokkiee / @geniaparadox / @ggthydrangea / @hanjesungs / @hanjisoonie / @hyunchanz / @jerirose / @jisungs / @juiceofmoons / @jisungsjaistandjeekies / @khairemisthios / @lee--felix / @leefelex / @leenow / @minzbins / @missyedits / @nevoono / @seo-changbinnies / @skz-films / @snug-gyu / @straykidsgallery / @winterfloral

i love you all, you've made being here on stayblr so nice and wonderful! i would've done this sooner, but i worked both new years eve and new years day. but better late than never! i hope 2023 is kind to us all! 💖

[polyamorouscultureis]

so this is a specific situation and uh i’d normally talk about it to my best friend bc she’s the only irl person who knows i’m a relationship anarchist but i can’t because it’s about her so i figured id see if you have any advice. so basically we’ve been besties for a few years (i’m in high school) and abt two years ago i had a crush on her and at that time neither of us had really been in a romantic relationship and it was my first real crush, i told her about she didn’t feel the same way and wasn’t ready for any romantic relationships anyway, so i pretty much got over it after a couple months and everything was cool. about a year ago we both started having romantic relationships and honestly none of the people either of us have dated were super great. anyway i’ve been single for a while and so this one time we had a sleepover together we were talking about how dating is hard and how you can’t really tell if people actually like you or just want to date somebody and she wa specifically saying how she wished she could just like kiss her friends and it not be weird (she referenced britney and santanas relationship at the beginning of glee!) and was was agreed with her and later we were cuddling and holding hands (which is pretty normal for us to do, i’m really touchy with my close friends which i actually found out bc of her) but like it felt more intimate than usual? like she was stroking my hair and tracing her fingers down my back and it was really sweet (while a slowed down version of teenage dream by katie perry was playing which feels like it means something) and i kissed her on the cheek/jawbone and she giggled and said i was cute! but ik she has a tendency to just kinda date people or let ppl kiss her bc she doesn’t wanna have to tell people no so i asked if it was okay that i did that and she was like “yeah it’s cool, i trust you, just keep it kinda private”(she’s v private about affection so it’s cool) and after we stopped cuddling she was joking around and sitting on her lap and uh i asked if i could kiss her (at the time i felt very platonic about it) and she said i could, so i did. and it was nice! not the most fireworks he he kiss i’ve had but it is the only one that i don’t think i’ll regret which is probably more important. but anyway a couple weeks later i start having kinda crushy feelings for her again, made a playlist and everything, but i can’t really tell if it’s queerplatonic/ alterous or a ‘normal’ romantic crush bc frankly i’m bad at understanding my own feelings. i think though that i want some sort of romantic friendship with her. honestly i’ve had romantic feelings on and off but she’s always a super important person in my life but she gets so busy i her worried our friendships more important to me than it is her and that feeling kinda sucks even when it’s wrong. but the problem is whatever the feelings are i don’t feel like i can tell her about it bc she started dating someone right after that day where we kissed so i never got the chance to talk about it and she’s Very much monogamous, she’s super supportive of me and whatever style relationships i want and but polyam just isn’t for her at all, so like what do i do? do i tell her i want a queer platonic relationship? do i keep it to myself until i’ve totally figured out what it is i want? or until she’s not in a relationship anymore??? (sorry for rambling on)

First of all this is so extremely cute <33

Second of all, it's hard to give advice in situations like this because there are so many unknowns. It's always a risk telling someone your feelings, especially if in the past they havent reciprocated. And it seems like you feel there is more to lose this time.

I guess the questions to ask yourself are, would it be more painful for you if she decided to stop being flirtatious with you because she didn't want to lead you on, or if she continued to flirt with you platonically after establishing that it will never be in a romantic capacity? What would change between you if you started a romantic relationship and what do you feel you miss out on without it? These are complex questions and it's sometimes hard to know what you want or how you would feel in just a hypothetical situation, but it may at least help point you in the direction you want to go. Best of luck anon!

[httpiastri]

some quick notes from your previous reply (i’m sorry i took so long ive been so busy recently but i finally have time now so):

firstly, i hope i never meet a handball player irl, ever. the fact that you just casually know people above 200cm?? i’m sorry but i’d actually feel like a pest around everyone 😓😓 (plus id get really jealous of heights) and id also be terrified to even stand near anyone close to 200 pls

and omg the fact that the guy who got you into coaching recently passed? i hope you’re doing okay 😓🙏 but if it helps— he may not have known how much he changed your life, but through coaching, you’re basically keeping his legacy alive, yeah? i think it matters, personally, that people are remembered and honoured and you’re kinda doing that through coaching, because you’re kinda solidifying (if that’s the right word for it) the fact that he existed, and he did enough good to change the lives of people for the better, and that his time here on earth wasn’t all in vain because he did good and he brought joy to people like you by leading you to being a coach and that his impact lives on even when he’s gone yk? it’s a form of closure, i think— to know that even if someone is gone now, there are pieces of them scattered behind in little things (in your case, in your daily life as a coach), and that not all is lost, just a little harder to find

also oops the fact that i called them girls even though they’re only a barely a few years younger than me 😭😭

and omg pepe would 100% make me feel comfortable meeting him at a race even if he might be stressed and no way you got to go to races at 8?? you had a chance to be one of those cute kids probably decked out in merch (if no merch was involved you probably got to scream happily at everything and good for you😭😭 because thats exactly how races should be experienced)

finding sponsors can’t be that hard… we could infiltrate the space in various ways im sure (my friend’s mum knows someone who works for Marlboro that gets invited to races bc the company was an EX-sponsor so anything’s possible)

on a rather unrelated note— pepe’s been acting very much like a muse for me recently… whatever that might mean… (might even be nothing honestly sometimes i don’t know what i mean either)

anyway! as always, i hope you have a lovely lovely friday, and weekend, and june (pepe’s month!), and that people are kind to you and that the sky looks beautiful and gorgeous all the time ❤️❤️

- 🪷💗

gosh dont apologize :( esp since you know im bad at answering….. its alright 🥺 just glad to hear from you 🥺🥺

shdjdhd it do be scary to meet really tall people!! when im around the men's team i work with sometimes, i almost get neck pains bcs staring up at them is so hard 😵‍💫 and i have this other job where i have to like sit by the court and do things for the match, and when players come over to talk to me and they literally tower over me???? insane 😶 but yes i too get jealous of heights, esp since in handball it's good for girls to be tall too so everyone around me is always tall asf? ive always been considered to be a tall person in school but at 175cm i am nowadays considered short in the team i currently play in 😐😐😐 so yes i feel u aaa (also several of the girls i coach are my height already and just. pls stop growing, you're scaring me. 🥲)

ALSO OMFG i almost forgot to answer this but i had a thought yesterday.... about my favorite volleyball player being 188cm and i thought "hm that's not very far off from pepe" so of course i have now started thinking about volleyball player!pepe 😶 idk if you enjoy volleyball aaaaaaa but i just thought about his height and his big ass hands that would make hitting the ball easier and just..........

thank you, im doing okay but it's still weird to imagine? because i haven't really had anyone close to me (or even semi-close) pass away so it's a very new experience, being in his neighborhood (very close to where i live) and thinking "oh what if i see him in the shop like that day-" before realizing... but god you put it in such a sweet way, im lowkey teary eyed :( i will continue to do my best to keep his legacy alive and honor him through my coaching!!! he created this thing that became so important to me and for that i will be forever thankful. but yes i agree, it means that he brought more meaning to my life and therefor also the girls i coach, and that's such a beautiful thing. it's life, i guess 😭 so hard but also so sweet...

skdjfhdjjf dont worry, i call them "children" to their faces very often even though some are even 16 😁 but to be fair ive known a lot of them since they were nine so to me they're still babies :(( also you being that young and still so smart is so cool and cute aaa

no because i have imagined meeting pepe MANY times and i really really think he would be so sweet about it. very happy that i recognize him and like "aw hey it's okay! no tears please" when i cry 😭 and i think he also would agree to do a silly pose with me for a photo aksjdhfjkdf 😭 i sadly didn't buy a lot of merch BUT (did i mention this already?? then i will be so insanely embarrassed....) we did get me a kimi lotus cap for obvious reasons 🥺 that i still have to this day actually !!! and ofc we took a pic of me next to the lotus truck 🤭 (also realizing now that i wasn't 8, i was 9 or 10 🤣 well well)

oh! then i think we can pretend to be your friend's mum's friend's kids? so we should also be invited?? or maybe we just need to get a job somewhere that has connections and can invite us..... to be fair my dad wrote to dino beganovic's manager or something about sponsoring him just for funsies (idk how u mean to sponsor someone just for fun tho 😶 he was like "what if i get my company's logo on his car and in return we get to come into the paddock once?..."), but then the manager responded with a full deal and stuff and my dad just got scared 😭 but we should keep looking, i'm sure we can find a good sponsor for us 🥰

aaaaa that's so sweet 🥺 i love that 🥺🥺🥺 if you feel like talking further about it, im all ears 🥰

aw dalring i hope you have an even lovelier lovely friday and week and month and year !!! and yes yes pepe's month, i think it will be very good to us all (esp him!!!!!!!) 🥰 i think that maybe the world listened to your ask because the sunset was so gorgeous tonight 🥺 so thank you for that <3<3

[peligrosapop]

I can’t sleep and have a headache, I’m in pain and sober ( weed would help 2/3 at the least)for some stupid reason. So, I’ll rant.

I went skating (as in skateboard) yesterday

did my first ever 50-50 trick (skate trick) at 40

but also pulled a muscle in my upper thigh and I’m limping a bit and it hurts. (Hi, It’s me, Pedri without free accessible healthcare)

A girl flirted/hit on me and I can’t thinking about it bc, maybe I liked the attention? and she’s cute? I get plenty of attention at home though, dunno wtf is going on.

I forgot to call my mom on her bday but I called her today and we talked like an hour and it was nice. I like my mom a lot. I don’t want her to die, ever. My dad’s death anniversary was last week and I just realized yesterday. None of us surviving family members said anything either, guess we rather forget.

The call with mom also made me realize I barely call anyone anymore, ever. Last time my older sister called I didn’t pick up and have ghosted her since. I told my mom I’m being anti social atm. I need to call my pregnant younger sister. I guess I’m the asshole.

I text with a lot of people that I don’t know IRL and have neglected a lot of my IRL friends. I even have neglected online friends I like a lot. I still chat people a bit too much, I’m afraid.

I think my current obsession with Barça on tumblr and tumblr in general helps me focus on something else but myself when I’m stuck creatively or emotionally.

I need to finish writing 4 songs that I started and are almost done. One about staring at your crush, one about dreaming of people that have passed away, one about Messi (in the most non-obvious way) and one about leaving everything behind to move somewhere else to remake your life. It is annoying to feel like I can’t when I’m perfectly able to. They are 80-90% done.

Right now I’m in between jobs doing some gigs and the break in routine and extra time to do fun stuff things has been , instead of being liberating, weird.

My fav girl friend has been really busy lately and I fucking hate it. I feel needy. And I hate it.

My boyfriend is amazing, thank god he’s there. My bff. I am a mess rn. He was trolling me a week ago saying “I read this list of symptoms of depressed people and you checked out most of them” and I laughed at him and he was like 😅. I’m not depressed. It’s okay. I have depressive tendencies from anxiety but that’s it. I’m a hedonist most of the time, anyway. 🤣 Very few fucks given but active existencial dread.

My health/body has been changing since I hit 40 and it’s pissing me off. Also I kinda stop caring care of myself for a second but getting back on track. Also need to start saving money for all the “hey you hit 40 so you may have this” health test, like cancer screenings and shit. But hey, better old than dead.

and….I need a hug. And to write poems but they won’t come out. I don’t need anyone to do anything. I just need to get it out of my system.

I wish you were here and not so far away, you know this. I punched my pillow today like I told you I wanted to. I wish it was easier.

We had a friend as a house guest for a week and he just left today without telling us, even though he was supposed to be here 2 more weeks and now he said he is with a dude we don’t talk to anymore. lol wtf is wrong with people?! can’t they be normal?!!!! You can say you wanna go see a friend, why just disappear and tell us a one like text when we asked where the fuck you are. He may come back? I dunno ahahahah. Maybe its our bad for having a bunch of moody musicians as friends.

Also, like my bf jokes all the time….when I die, be happy for me because I won’t have to pay any more bills.

Maybe this was too real but IDGAF. The end.

[cinnamostar]

hello~!! o//u///o I'm new to you're blog and I'm already loving it ! I want to ask if u allow any requests, cuz if so! do you do ot8 of stray kids? I was watching SKZ family and GODDAMN, there's a lot of drama ToT I was thinking, how would reader fit into this? it can either be platonic or romantic, I just really want to see what dynamic they would all share if reader was a 9th member lol! It's no pressure if u don't want to!! Please stay hydrated and take as much break if u want~

hi there!! thank you so much for the compliment :') it means a lot to me! i don't usually do requests bc im pretty busy irl and ive never written anything for ot8/9th member bc it sounds hard to write accurately :o but ill try lol

this wont be a fic but rather just discussing the dynamic :3

hmm, skz in general is a vey close, tight-knit group of friends, they definitely have more of a familial bond and are very comfortable around each other. i think a ninth member reader would probably mix in the same way, so i want to say it would probably be a very much sibling-like relationship! which is why i stray away from any romantic ninth member content bc i dooo think it would most likely just be purely platonic. sure, romantic relations could play out, but in my mind, the kind of bond the have is so ... brotherly that i'd like to think a ninth member wouldn't change that and only add to that.

the way this dynamic would play out would depend on the reader themselves :') i wanna say regardless, they'd be quite loving and protective just how they are with each other, but you know, age, personality, and interests do affect how these relationships play out.

if you're on the younger end of the group, they'd def take care of you and dote on you like a younger sibling! kinda like how we see everyone tease jeongin, they'd probably do the same with the reader and be annoying older brothers, but still be as protective as necessary. iii think each member would have their own style of interacting with a younger ninth member? each have their own love language, so it will vary. for exampleee, i think changbin would be incredibly affectionate

if you’re older, then there’s probably some level or respect they will all have for you, but you might be someone they go to for advice more often than not!

IM SORRY ANONNIE THAT THIS TOOK SO LONG 😭😭😭 I don’t do requests bc I know I’ll take forever (Liek this) and also idk this is as far my brain lets me think for this.. ngl I prob will never do ot8 x reader content bc I don’t know how to write that many characters usually LOL but I JUSY think it would be friendly and vibes

[moodywyrm]

moony i’m all over the place right now and i just need advice? comfort? unsure but..

i’m going to college soon, and i’m moving away from all of my family and friends. i don’t know what to do. i’m awful at making friends, i’m shy, i’m quiet, and i’m awkward, and the only reason i actually have something of a friendgroup is because i got brought into it by someone else :(.

i’ve never been able to have actual friends, even now, like i never get invited to their hangouts, and what makes it even worse is that when i invite them somewhere, they’re ALL busy with sports or homework, but then i see a few hours later that they all went out to do something fun. they never text me even when i make attempts to text them, they all have inside jokes that i’m never part of, and i’m so scared of that happening again.

i can’t even hold online friends - last time i did, we got in a fight because someone made up stupid lies and fabricated messages about me and then they all dropped me.

i don’t know what to do, i don’t want to be alone for the rest of my life. do you have any advice?? :(

oh honeybee. (also im assuming your like just graduating highschool? or like a transfer? 18+ obvs) we're about to get kinda personal.

I was in the Exact same position. my entire first year was online bc of covid but when I moved here I had absolutely no one. when I tell you I was the exact same way, no friends of my own and terrible at keeping them, I mean it. by the time I moved to college in my second year i had just lost (or was about to lose) all but one of my online friends (who is now my best friend loml, the good ones will stay with you I promise) and only had one irl friend (my best friend of 10 yrs now). I was in pretty much the same position.

so my advice/words of not very wise wisdom: I'm not gonna sit here and tell you it won't be scary or sad for while because it probably will. college can be scary. it can also be wonderful! and freeing! you 100% have to get used to being on your own, enjoying your own company. it'll make the alone time so much easier. also, for the love of everything good in the world, don't shut yourself up in your dorm or apartment. I did for basically a year and it was miserable. go to the library, go hang out on campus, something! try to make friends in your classes, even if it's just for that class, you'll get more comfortable talking to people. and honestly, most importantly, don't lose hope and fall into the permanently alone I hate everyone mindset. I hit that and it SUCKED and then I met two of the most incredible, kindest people I could have ever met. and it takes a while!! don't expect to find friends immediately, genuinely just take some time to learn how to be alone with yourself, it will be so worth it. don't try to force yourself to be friend with people you don't really like, btw. it doesn't make you any less lonely, it just makes you sad.

I know it sounds scary and daunting, but it will be okay! and if you ever need big sister advice and comfort, im right here. I know it's scary, but you're there for a reason. it will be okay, I promise you.

im sorry if this wasn't helpful but I was in the same position for the first two and a half years of college before I met my friends

[lilredghost]

Tag Game To Better Know You

Send this to people you’d like to know better!

Tagged by @bladling (hi!!!)

What book are you currently reading? Idk I’ve had The Fellowship of the Ring on my bedside table for like months now. But I haven’t had time to read it?? Clown emoji.... SW has taken over my life so it’ll have to wait

What’s your favorite movie you saw in theaters this year? I’m preeetty sure I didn’t go to any movies this year. My cousins all went to see the black panther movie together but I was busy OTL

What do you usually wear? Sweaters or crewnecks with jeans, but I need to buy more plaid and flannels again. I used to dress like a butch but my old clothes either don’t fit or have holes. I’ve been avoiding getting new ones bc I hate shopping, lol

How tall are you? 5’6”, but my driver’s license says 5’7” for some reason

What’s your Star Sign? Do you share a birthday with a celebrity or a historical event? Immm gonna be honest, if blade didn’t answer “capricorn” I wouldn’t even know what you meant by star sign. I’m a sagittarius or however u spell it. I’m not even gonna bother googling the second question

Do you go by your name or a nick-name? I hate my name but I do go by it irl. On here I like to stick to some variation on my username

Did you grow up to become what you wanted to be when you were a child? Do you want the funny version or the sad version of this story? I honestly never thought I’d be anything, so in grade school I just put something random and different everytime someone/something asked. I'm a grad student rn

Are you in a relationship? If not, who is your crush if you have one? Nooope, I’m extremely single (and ready to mingle?)

What’s something you’re good at vs. something you’re bad at? I’m good at crafts! I’ve got a decent amount of experience with needlework and I’ve been thinking I want to branch out into something that’s more functional (like crocheting or sewing) compared to purely artistic.

I’m bad at reaching out of my comfort zone. I feel like life is already hard enough in the day-to-day, so finding the motivation to do something new and different is hard. I need a friend who will drag me out :(

Dogs or cats? Either one, they’re cute in different ways!

If you draw/write or create in any way, what’s your favorite picture/line/etc from something you created this year? Probably this bit from Take Care of Me, Please? These fics make me feel extremely seen, and I can’t wait to get back to them when I have a chance

But it seems too easy. Anakin is… Anakin is the brightest star in his life. He smiles and laughs and shines with such charisma—such gravity—that he must surely be at the center of everyone’s solar systems, not just Obi-Wan’s. What could Obi-Wan have possibly done, to deserve such devotion?

What’s something you would like to create content for? Well blade is right, “content” is kind of a shitty word. We are inspired and driven to make art. We’re sharing pieces of ourselves; in this essay I will... Anyway the answer to this is obvious: Star Wars

What’s something you’re currently obsessed with? Star Wars again! I normally fandom hop a decent amount but ever since I found SW, something has sort of settled in me. I hope it never goes away <3

What’s something you were excited about that turned out to be disappointing this year? Man I joined a westmarches campaign and it was very disappointing compared to a regular dnd campaign. I understand the draw of the structure, but it's just not as much fun

What’s a hidden talent of yours? Idk if you’d call it a “talent” but I really like to sing. When I get my own place, I’m never going to shut up <3

Are you religious? Kind of? My cultural roots are very deep and my religion is all tied up in that. But my health is bad, I regularly get fierce pains, and I’ve been depressed for like ten years now. Not to say that you CAN’T have faith coexisting with all those things, but I’m just exhausted. It’s not for me. (Or at least, it’s not for the me that exists right now. I suppose that could change in the future)

What’s something you wish to have at this moment? Ummmm, an ask in my inbox? Jk jk

I know this is a long one so don't feel obligated or anything but I'm tagging @leafchan15 @tennessoui @kyberkenobi

[polyamorouspunk]

so this is a specific situation and uh i’d normally talk about it to my best friend bc she’s the only irl person who knows i’m a relationship anarchist but i can’t because it’s about her so i figured id see if you have any advice. (i’m sorry it’s super long i just don’t know how to talk about my feelings without rambling a bunch)

so basically we’ve been besties for a few years (i’m in high school) and abt two years ago i had a crush on her and at that time neither of us had really been in a romantic relationship and it was my first real crush, i told her about she didn’t feel the same way and wasn’t ready for any romantic relationships anyway, so i pretty much got over it after a couple months and everything was cool.

about a year ago we both started having romantic relationships and honestly none of the people either of us have dated were super great.

anyway i’ve been single for a while and so this one time we had a sleepover together we were talking about how dating is hard and how you can’t really tell if people actually like you or just want to date somebody and she wa specifically saying how she wished she could just like kiss her friends and it not be weird (she referenced britney and santanas relationship at the beginning of glee!) and was was agreed with her and later we were cuddling and holding hands (which is pretty normal for us to do, i’m really touchy with my close friends which i actually found out bc of her) but like it felt more intimate than usual? like she was stroking my hair and tracing her fingers down my back and it was really sweet (while a slowed down version of teenage dream was playing,she picked the music, which feels like it means something) and i kissed her on the cheek/jawbone and she giggled and said i was cute!

but ik she has a tendency to just kinda date people or let ppl kiss her bc she doesn’t wanna have to tell people no so i asked if it was okay that i did that and she was like “yeah it’s cool, i trust you, just keep it kinda private”(she’s very private about affection and i get it so it’s cool)

and after we stopped cuddling she was joking around and sitting on her lap and uh i asked if i could kiss her (at the time i felt very platonic about it) and she said i could, so i did. and it was nice!

but anyway a couple weeks later i start having kinda crushy feelings for her again, made a playlist and everything, but i can’t really tell if it’s queerplatonic/ alterous or a ‘normal’ romantic crush bc frankly i’m bad at understanding my own feelings. i think though that i want some sort of romantic friendship with her. honestly i’ve had romantic feelings on and off but she’s always a super important person in my life but she gets so busy i her worried our friendships more important to me than it is her and that feeling kinda sucks even when it’s wrong.

but the problem is whatever the feelings are i don’t feel like i can tell her about it bc she started dating someone right after that day where we kissed so i never got the chance to talk about it and she’s Very much monogamous, she’s super supportive of me and whatever style relationships i want and but polyam just isn’t for her at all,

so like what do i do? do i tell her i want a queer platonic relationship? do i keep it to myself until i’ve totally figured out what it is i want? or until she’s not in a relationship anymore???

Man that really sucks. It sounds queerplatonic to me but either way that shit’s gonna eat you up inside eventually. Maybe not in a jealous way but hiding any feelings you have from someone, be it romantic, sad, angry, etc. that shit eats at you. It would be healthiest for YOUR mental health to tell her, but maybe not for the situation. I’m normally very much an advocate for “tell people how you feel!!” but honestly like I feel like telling her you have feelings for her might mess up the relationship she’s in right now (it might not! but it could). That’s a sticky situation. And I mean even if she’s chill with a qpr with you her partner might not be, and that’s totally reasonable and valid of them. If I were you I wouldn’t say anything but I feel like that’s really shitty advice to give you. Like I feel really shitty being like “lol just bottle up your feelings and keep them to yourself” but I want to be honest and not give you advice that I don’t think I would take myself. But I mean also I know that shit would eat me up inside and at some point I would have to say something. So. I guess that’s my advice. At some point you have to say something if it doesn’t go away. Because like also I’m thinking about how I (Savvy) had feelings for my best friend (this was when we weren’t very solid at all so Punk has nothing to do with this, if strictly would have been a relationship between Savvy and her not Punk at all) and like we got into this huge fight about it like we could be a qpr maybe no this is really shitty timing I feel like you’re taking advantage of me etc. etc. and like. My feelings for her did go away again. So I have like 0 romantic feelings for her anymore when at one point I think I did. That was another point of fighting for us too where I was like I think I have a crush on you but I might be making it up. I don’t get over people easily (or ever) I think she’s like the only person I’ve gotten over (twice). So like feelings can change and you might once again not be interested in something like that later on down the line. So I guess yeah, I think waiting to see if that’s what you really want is best. Because I thought for a while I wanted a qpr with my best friend and then my feelings for her faded and now I really don’t have any interest in having one with her anymore.

[witch-hazels-musings]

Hazel !! Hi !!

If you don’t remember me (it’s okay, we haven’t interacted for awhile), it’s light anon !!

I’m so sorry I haven’t sent anything in, I’ve been really busy with irl stuff and with writing;;;

I reached a new mile stone !! I got 2k notes on a post and I’m almost at 800 followers :D I never thought I’d ever get that far, I still remember when you rbed one of my posts (ofc I would bc my heart nearly stopped-) and even though I got to here, I’ll never forget that. I think it was the highlight of this entire journey :,)

And in my personal life, I know I haven’t been the happiest in these asks, but I’m glad to tell you that although things aren’t perfect, they’re on the right track and this is the most positive I’ve felt in years. I’ve been going out of the house, going to classes, socialising, I think I’ve even made a few new friends. It’s so crazy to think back on how I was just a few months ago and now here I am. I feel like a weights been lifted for me, and one day, I’ll truly be happy with life. Not quite there yet, but this is the best it’s been for a very long time.

I don’t have much time to read anymore, but I have some free time so I’m going to read a few of your recent works because they make me happy, and I haven’t told you for a while but you’re still an amazing writer and person :,)

Sorry for how long this is, I’ll try to be more regular with keeping in touch but I’m just;;;; terrible at doing that. Sorry- (again :,( )

- love, light 💞

hello light <3 

it’s alright, you’ve been busy and working on stuff, i understand!! get it friend

WOOWWO congrats on your milestone! that’s incredible, and of course you did - as long as you kept trying and learning and growing, you worked very hard lovely, very very hard! -- oooh, well it was a great story so of COURSE i’d wanna share it heheh 

im so glad you are doing well, that you are having a lot of active opportunities to get out there and see people. even though we may be interoverted, we still need a little bit of social to stay connected (i hope your friends treat you well <3) 

I hope you are doing even better, light!! I’m sending you my best and all my love *mwuah!*

[bunny-rambles]

bunny bunny BUNNY!!

omg omg i stay away from this platform for two days bc of stuff (nothing serious dw i've just been busy with some irl birthday lol) and i come back and see what??

okay, let's make some order:

- you've been in a car crash??? my baby i've read from your answers that you're better now but :////// anyways if the head wound still hurts i will pray for the fastest recovery!!

- congrats congrats on the 700 followers!! ✨ every time i see you reaching some sort of milestone i get really really happy eheh :3

- this is gonna be boring bc someone has beat me to the punch, but i too ship you with albedo! hehe i think you'd look super cute together <3 lil sweet bunny and the pretty alchemist

- last (but not least. definitely not least) omg the new piece???? i was dead set on declaring the tighnari part my favorite as soon as i finished reading it but then scaramouche happened and??? i need a second to breathe wow. i love him i love him i love him so much i wanna be the one that comforts him when he's feeling down sigh seriously tho i adored it. might be a bit of a personal bias bc ya know, it's my fave boys we're talking about but still. what a nice surprise to be back to.

and this is it! wanted to come back with some funny anecdote but i really didn't do much recently. ah, but my friends and i are making a series of board games about our favorite tv show and these days i've been busy making the trivial pursuit version of it. it turned out so cute i'm super happy :D

also! we haven't done the italian word of the day in a while so here you go: today's word is tartaruga, which means turtle, bc today i played with my turtle and he's just the cutest boy don't tell scara tho

bye bye buns! no matter what, i hope this ask finds you well

ti voglio bene!

- 🍓

Goodness, I only left this a few days but those numbers have increased so much-

I now have 838followers,,, crazy, right? I couldn’t move past 600 for nearly two months and now I’m only 162 off my goal for this account…

It’s strange, there are times where I’m asking if it’s deserved, and honestly it’s a little overwhelming with the amount of new people here, but it’s been nice to finally have something I’m proud of be seen and talked about, it’s,,, it’s nice to have my abilities validated :,) I know that shouldn’t be important but I can’t help it, I like hearing nice things about my work

Mhm, I was in a car crash. I only came out with a cut on my forehead but I’m extremely hesitant getting into a car after;;; even now I’m clinging onto the seatbelt until my knuckles are white. But don’t worry fragola, I’m alright 💞

Hehehehehehe~ ahhh albedo my beloved, I love hearing how I’m shipped with him. Ahem… self indulgent little drabble, skip over this if you want;;; -

hand in hand on top a snowy mountain, a smile on our faces. we’re cold, our breaths mingling together through the cool mist exiting our lips, but the warmth in our chests is enough for us to not feel the unforgiving chill. enough for each other, for that is all we need. even the harshness of the hostile environment, all around us looks like a dreamscape - the winter wonderland you only hear about in fairy tales. yes, hand in hand, I’ve found the flame that keeps my heart alight, burning brightly. undying, like our unconventional love.

i love my boy so very much 💞

oh my god I put all my emotions for scara into that, I just really want to reach through the screen and reassure him that even though life has been cruel, there are some things that aren’t so bad. They might not last for long, but another good thing replaces it. (… maybe I’m not just talking about scara anymore)

Anyway-

Hehehe thank you dearest /)/////(\ scara was the highlight of that piece, but I liked all of them, tighnari’s was absolutely a self indulgent vent though college is killing me OTL

Hehe when I first read that I just thought of Tartaglia the tartaruga, and now an imagine of a lil turtle with water blades and a scarf lives in my head rent free - I hope you find this just as amusing, or maybe my humours just broken.

ti voglio bene, it’s nice to hear you’re doing well, don’t be a stranger and drop by my inbox whenever you’d like, I love hearing from my dear fragola <3

[bisluthq]

Is Shawn gay for real? People joke about it all the time but I am serious. Before Camila, he never had a public gf and Hailey does not count that was not a real couple- more like situationship or hook up.

Apparently he used to date his prom date Lauren but I dont know if there is proof of that. He tweeted he used to have a secret gf in like 2017 for two years which could be a lie. Every other singer flaunts their gf or bf but he gives bearded vibes ngl. We know every male pop star women they claim and they are affectionate publicly to them.

That photo of Shawn from last summer with his guy friends who were all obviously girly pop is so funny. A straight man can be friends with a gay guy but that many of them...kinda sus

I heard some rumours so take it with a grain of salt, but I heard Shawn dad is homophobic...

bruh. Bruh. Shawn has BEGGED people not to discuss this so this discussion will genuinely be my 13th reason. He says it makes him uncomfy, that it makes him super self-conscious, and that as far as he knows he’s not gay lol (tho he’s also not homophobic and *is* an ally but some of his denials come off somewhat homophobic but ALSO just LEAVE HIM ALONE that’s all he’s asked for and then he wouldn’t have to issue weird sounding denials). Who KNOWS lol? Maybe Shawn himself doesn’t. But it’s super weird to speculate about something that personal when a person LITERALLY BEGS FANS not to. When a celeb - or fwiw a person you know - says “I am asking people very nicely not to discuss my sexuality” and you keep doing it that’s super messed up.

Now people who are soft closeted - like Richard Madden lol where super legitimate publications put “roommate” in inverted commas because he doesn’t want to publicly come out but he’s also not exactly doing anything to hide it - are fair game lol we can all have a chuckle about that. (Not at Richard so much but at people who don’t buy that he’s yk not straight even though he’s doing bugger all to hide it beyond saying “I’m not gonna publicly come out because it’s not your business” essentially like obvi everyone who knows Richard irl knows his “roommate” is his bf and anyone with two brain cells knows whichever flavor of the year it is is in fact his bf). When celebs signal before they publicly come out or just like to hint they’re open to it, also fair enough (like Rihanna has never said “I’m bi” but she’s made enough comments that obviously she’s at least somewhat into women). But if someone explicitly says “this makes me extremely uncomfortable, KINDLY stop doing this” idk why anyone would feel the need to keep going??

This is also my issue with even the softest Gaylors atp - she’s asked people to stop??? She says it makes her feel weird??? She hasn’t said it makes her feel as weird as Shawn said it made him feel but she’s also asked to like shut it down???? Which part’s not clicking???

Finally re public gfs idk lots of people in the public eye don’t want to date super publicly - some for sexuality reasons for sure, some because they tend to date more normies, some because like idk about y’all but I don’t hard launch every fucking thing I’m involved in so why would celebs? It’s imo sorta weird to go “well this person doesn’t post a bunch of flings on Insta and they don’t take dates to celeb hotspots and don’t date people as famous as them necessarily so ergo they don’t date anyone” yk? (Not saying that’s what you said because you did say PUBLIC gf but like my point is public is irrelevant bc we don’t know who they’re seeing outside of the sliver of their life that we are privy to).

Anyway, my personal rules are if a person says they don’t like that conversation, stop having it. Also don’t accuse people of queerbaiting because real people genuinely can’t lol? That’s a term created for shows and films and books that tease it to keep a gay audience with no intention of writing it into the plot. Don’t accuse people of being fake gay either because MANY OF US experiment and aren’t quite sure of exact labels and that’s okay too. Normalize just saying like… people are people and celebs are people. If labels make them happy, dope. Trust that they know that whichever one they’re using rn fits them best in their own head or at least is the best one for them to say out loud. Also remember that you’re allowed to change your labels. You’re allowed to experiment and try shit out on all sides of the equation. You’re allowed to have a preference but pepper in some other stuff lol. Idk man just let people vibe.

Gossiping about celeb mess is fun lol but gossiping about something that personal like… being gay/queer LABEL WISE or “are they closeted???” isn’t mess it’s a super personal thing and idk man. Like if you wanna say lol - with some evidence - “I heard Shawn kissed a boy at this party he went to lol” I’d be like “lmaooo what happened” but that’s got fuck all to do with his label/speculation about his identity then - that’d just be a fun rumor about him doing something a bit wild. It’s the speculation on identity that I have a problem with? I’ll add the one thing I’m even more hectic about tho is fertility speculation because there’s NO WAY that can be a fun rumor. Also serious psychiatric diagnoses like if you say someone is on the spectrum or has a personality disorder idk why that’d be a fun rumor. Gossiping about mess = funny. Gossiping about real deep shit like… isn’t fun or funny to me and shouldn’t be to anyone with a tad of empathy.

Fyi that’s also my rule for real life gossip. Hilarious to hear like my friend got drunk and made out with a bunch of people and like snorted ❄️ off someone’s tits or w/e. Not hilarious to be like “did u hear that couple is going for IVF but it’s not working” yk??? Just have idk empathy.

[hyunverse]

omfg i cannot even imagine moving away from the city to countryside i bet that such a difficult adjustment. NOOO you don’t sound like a brat my love it’s not your fault you grew up in a diff area !! 100% agree they just creep me OUTTTTTT. but it’s weird bc i find domesticated rats super cute and i know they’re super clean but if i saw one irl i would cry and scream and run 😀😀😀😀

OMFG RIGHT ??? I WANT TO KNOW LEE KNOWS WORK OUT ROUTINE SO BAD AND I DONT EVEN WORK OUT. also dude felix’s whole outfit in that was just tdf. honestly …. i found his lower back showing to be kinda hotter than the abs …. i’m just a sucker for dudes backs okay 😔😔. cant wait to attend you and hyunjins wedding and if you need a third pls do lmk 😇 hehe

YEP YOU GET IT !! the men who just look like the eiffel tower are the way to my heart <33333 and the ones who look dead inside w long hair and nice hands <33333 good lord bring them here RNNNN. okay short queens look at us go and flourish. and it’s cute that you’re a little taller than me hehe. AND I DID THE HAND MEASURING and they’re 15.8 cm ^_^ which is cuteeeeee. usually i don’t find myself cute but i feel like that’s kinda cute hehe. i gotta know yours now so we can compare

ALSO I DIDNT DW 🙏🏼 i treated myself to some starbucks after class anddddd now i’m getting chinese food oh yea 😎 i’m taking care of myself just for u ig 🙄. all of those foods are a 12/10, i just looked up tomyum and it looks AMAZINGGGGGGG. i love seafood and spicy so that is right up my alley yum yum yum. i want to try it now. my fave food is sushi, but i love literally everything tbh. i don’t think there’s one food that i hate (although i will say i do not like beets or radishes no matter how many times i try them). food is the way to my heart tho i love cooking and food SM but especially cooking for ppl. and i love eating w my friends and family. if food was a love language it would be mine 😇

😽😽😽😽😽😽 cat kisses 4 u. i’m so excited

to hear your hand size hehe (i’m a slut for hands it’s so bad)

- 🐈‍⬛

PLEASE RIGHT. . . imagine i’m used to seeing busy streets and skyscrapers but when i moved for uni i saw cows. COWS. the only time i see a cow at home is on a plate when it’s already become beef soup. 💀 i do Not find rats cute at all 😭 THEY FREAK ME OUT TOOOO MUCH.

talking abt lower backs. . . god i love it when they wear those shirts with open backs 🗣‼️ ALL OF EM LOOK GOOD IN THEM GOOD GOD WHOEVER INVENTED OPEN BACK TOPS NEED THEY ASS ATE 💯 yes ofc ure invited to our wedding u can become my maid of honour and no third person sorry im not poly and im greedy but i will set u up with minho fr 🤝

THE MEN WHO LOOK DEAD HELP I THOUGHT I WAS THE ONYL ONE 🤩 I GET UUU WE ARE SOULMATES!! SOULMATES, BABY! ong ur hands are smaller than mine <33 mine’s 17cm ^__^ so we have roughly about 2cm difference, that’s so cute T_T

YAYAYA tomyum is so yummy i just had it for dinner ^__^ i will gladly cook u a pot baby! i love sushi omg. . . forgot to put that in my list of fave foods. love the salmon ones sm. god i love salmon. if we meet we r having a cooking sesh fr 🤝 i love cooking. it’s theraupetic <33 now im curious, whats ur usual starbucks order? do you get coffee, or something else?

u have my hand size now :-)) thank u for the cat kissies now i present to u, bunny kissies 🐰🐇

[a-wild-things-rambles]

hi the post above finaly got me to wright down alot of my thoughts to do with john and the community's hes been part of and how that affects him [through my eyes as a younger person in alot of the same community's, looking at the people who have lead similar lives- minus the occult stuff[mostly]] its long but there is a tldr

[for context my tags on the post: #especialy “John wouldn’t probably own a bisexual flag ever or have any pride memorabilia”#that really made something click im my mind for john#alot of they way i approach john is through the lens of an old punk#idk how to explain but you have these people that are subtely off from the norm but normal people cant quite put a finger on#and you could never tell from looking that they say go to all the protests and riots and sing for the tories to die#theres people who wear it proudly#and people who hide it because of others reactions#or just cause its personal and not strangers buisness#i feel john grew up with people having enough reasons to put him down. hes not handing them more#but also theres a difference between pride in part of your identity and showing other ppl and strangers it#some stuff is very personal- im p out and proud queer but there are some other apects of my identity that im very proud of#but dont want to shout from the rooftops#cause its personal#and i think thats how john feels about his bisexuality#its part of him and i dont think he hates it#but its just. a part of him#sorry for the long tags tldr your right and i hadent thought about it like that but it makes alot of sense#john constantine]

I always feel it’s important to look at the character and the history, and not ascribe newer ideas and things to older characters- i think there is a lot of value in looking at how john would approach it differently than lot of people now- especially looking through the groups has been part of, the people I know like john [northern, working class, dysfunctional family situations, bounced around alternative groups and subcultures] sexuality isn’t really a big thing? people are accepting of queer people but. it’s just not a thing that’s announced, gender roles are being broken by most people anyway and there’s just this acceptance and disregard of labels that tends to come from being in the mixed community of all types of people who have all had millions of different labels - I found out that two of the people I consider my aunts are both bisexual cause my mum was joking about how they can pick anyone but neither have had a long term relationship. it’s just so casual, you love who you love, and you are who you are and it’s not really anyone’s business- i found out an old friend of both my parents was a trans woman- unfortunately I never met her before she passed- but I wasn’t told until years after I came out as trans because it wasn’t a big thing, just one part of the identity of an old friend. I think it’s hard for a lot of queer people to see someone talk about 'oh we don’t care about the labels' and how it’s not that important, but the way it is now and was seems to be the true ideal of that idea- no one cares about the labels- if they turn you down they turn you down, if they correct the pronouns they have corrected the pronouns, "be who you wanna be do who you wanna do". You’re the captain of your fate.

I mentioned bouncing around groups and labels, and it’s something I see a lot of irl and very much informs my view of john, I am part of a community of people who have all been through different subcultures and groups- rude boys and metalheads and hippies and punks and travellers- all having stood against the mainstream but found no one label fits them. most of the people I have met at the gatherings have very complex identities- rude boy to punk to post punk- hippie to punk and so on, the mixing and combining of subcultures to make something that’s the best of all the things you love and are- I know we talk a lot with john about him being punk/expunk- but he was a hippie for a while and has been part of many subcultures- to view him as a binary- punk and then post that, seems reductive- I know these days people have ideas more solid borders on subcultures, you’re a punk or a goth, rude boy or hippie- disregarding the long history of people being part of both or multiple groups- and the groups that form from those overlaps. so yea I think it important to acknowledge that john has been part of many subcultures and that informs him- especially the identity issues due to not being wholly one thing, it’s why my community is great- no one is simple, it always a mix- folk and punk, ska and folk, dub sets played on fiddles and banjos- it’s about celebrating our defences, and coming together in our differences to appreciate and celebrate the complexities and contradictions of others, and the things that come from that. one love and all that.

we are the sum of our experiences- and we should celebrate that!

but it comes to a point where you get tired of breaking down all the influences and your just you. are you punk? are you buy? are you a rude boy/girl? are you gender queer? you get tired of the labels and boxes and are just you- after all YOU are the sum of your experiences. other people can look at you and try an analyze you but that’s their thing- your you and the labels that used to matter don’t as much- your comfortable being you, you like some of the music some people do and some music others do- you dress like this but also like that. labels and trying to be a certain thing can get tiring, it’s easier to just be you. it’s a long road to get there- and a hard one to- but as much as I revel in being part of a group of people with the same experiences as me- it can get tiring having the only parts of my identity they engage with be the part we share- god knows I’ve made lots of friends through queer solidarity but sometimes I want to be me not the labels, to be looked at in three dimensions, its why there is a community of people whose best answer to most questions is 'it’s complicated'

ok that ran away from me but that’s why I think johns identity is complex and his queerness isn’t a big thing he shows of.

tldr: often people who go from subculture to subculture trying to find something that fits them get to old and tired to make themselves into the latest thing and no longer can be asked to care about labels and end up content being them and if u wanna try and break them down into all the separate identities then that’s your thing but it’s a bit weird mate. And that’s why I agree that johns not loud about his bisexuality.

[eightw]

finished playing life is strange true colours and honestly? it was immesnly underwhelming, and kinda disappointing.

im gonna rant about it here a little bc i dont have any friends who like the game lol

my biggest problem is that none of the choices matter, at all, and you can tell even as you’re making them. half feel like nothing more than dialogue choices, and the rest have no outcome on the ending. jed is arrested no matter who believes you, forgiving him or condemning him has no effect on either of them, and in the end the most important decision you make is the silly “do i stay or leave” bullshit. like, i really don’t care??? the one and only choice i made that felt like it had consequences was choosing to sign the affidavit vs taking pike’s fear and guess what, that choice didn’t fucking matter either! you take down jed and typhon either way! 

now don’t get me wrong im not against a happy ending (even if i prefer the endings in LIS 1 and LIS 2). my problem is mostly that they’re both extremely shallow, and have nothing to do with the game you’ve just played. the biggest change is who you romanced, but even that doesn’t change anything other than which character model is in the scene. but also, not to get on my high horse or anything, but insisting that they needed to make a happy game because you’re “tired of the depression games” (actually quote i saw on someone complaining about the criticism of true colours) means nothing. like, okay, so you want to ingest nothing but fluff and happy times, regardless of depth, i get that, it’s your right. but why does other media have to conform to your desires? i do think it’s worse that they didn’t stick with the themes of the other games, even if it was in the name of making things happier. seek out something that’s happy, rather than insisting something pr-existing change, or thinking it’s a good thing that it did. 

the last episode is also kinda unwhelming. like, i love the flashbacks, but they feel like they’re coming way too late in the game. up to this point alex has shown little preoccupation over her past, and they put so much emphasis on “you need to stop rewriting your memories” even though up until this point we’ve been given no reason to think she’s struggling with this, or the whole “you need to be strong thing”?? it’s like they invent a whole bunch of character issues just for the sake of resolving them. 

alex’s powers are also immensely boring. they’re interesting for the first fifteen minutes, where we see her being overtaken by mac’s rage and ethan’s fear, but then she just, magically overcomes that weakness, i guess?? and spends the rest of the game reading other people’s emotions with no problem, which isn’t interesting from the start because all the characters are already making it clear what they’re feeling, but made worse by the fact that there isn’t actually any gameplay for her powers. it’s just watching a slide show of the zoomed in object while listening to a voice over. most of the time, it isn’t even telling the player anything new. 

don’t even get me fucking started on the LARP. it was so goddamn long, and for nothing! none of it was plot important, and it comes right after such a build up, they’ve just stolen the usb, now what’s going to happen? oh. a hella long LARP where nothing matters. great /s. if i wanted to roleplay, i’d play a roleplaying game. if i wanted to LARP, i’d do it irl and not in a video game. 

the only thing i really liked about this game was the characters, at least the few that don’t get shelved halfway through. i love gabe (especially in the fifth episode), and alex, and of course i love steph and ryan. so if you see me reblogging art of them mind your business lol. i like the story, i like the characters, did not like it as a video game.