#I finished the novel the other day and now I am Unwell

[peoplearescary]

There is something about Yoo Junghyuk initially coming to the conclusion that Secretive Plotter is Kim Dokja from the future because Secretive Plotter had some sort of animosity towards Kim Dokja and wants to destroy him

And Kim Dokja meeting a younger version of himself and immediately trying to kill the Oldest Dream (and himself if that's what it takes).

[utilitycaster]

I'm Reading the Drizzt Novels and You Can't Stop Me: Homeland (and some anticipated questions)

Welcome to yet another ongoing series from me, a person who should be doing other things and may abandon it but also frankly will do this for her own entertainment regardless of whether anyone else cares. Let's back up first; if you're not in this car with me, get out of the rearview mirror.

Until now I have pretty much only read the Drizzt novels in situations where I was unwell, tired, or without another easy means of entertainment. Specifically, I read the first few while quarantining with a mild but still unpleasant case of COVID in late 2022, and then some others while dealing with catching up at work/post-illness fatigue/the general vibes of December in the northeast and Midatlantic states of the US. This caught me up to book 6, which represent the scene-setting; more on this later.

I then read Book 7 on a long train ride with nothing else to do, while very tired and probably a little hungover, in January 2023. I enjoyed it, in part because Wulfgar, who I do not care for, dies. (spoilers I guess? I'm not explicitly avoiding spoilers because these books are 30+ years old, but I'm not seeking them out, and I believe he comes back to life eventually).

I then proceeded to read Real Books (TM) for the remainder of 2023, some of which I can recommend highly and some of which were dumber than Wulfgar. Flash forward to getting my car serviced in the tail end of December 2023. I intended to bring my laptop. I did not. I also intended to bring headphones. I did not. And so, with a phone with so-so battery and little interest in watching HGTV, I read book 8. And I thought "what if I started doing this, because I can knock out one of these motherfuckers in a day if I try hard enough." I then thought "what if I slam books 1-7 again and do a book a week in 2024?"

Clearly I did not do this, because again, I have other books to read and things to do. However, I have finally, after another long-ass train ride, finished a reread of book 1. And so, with an unclear but hopefully from now on twice a month at least (?) update schedule, I bring you: Homeland. The rest of these posts will probably be way shorter.

For anyone who is not familiar with Drizzt or Forgotten Realms or whatever: this is a weird choice you've made. Anyway. Forgotten Realms is THE iconic D&D setting; it's where both the Baldur's Gate series is set as well as the D&D movie plus all kinds of adventures. What's it like? Well, it's basically The Tough Guide to Fantasyland, for all my Diana Wynne Jones fans out there. Do none of these references work for you? You'll just have to pick it up as we go along.

The Legend of the Legend of Drizzt is basically, as far as I know (and I don't know much) R.A. Salvatore was hired to write some cool adventures in a D&D setting in the early 90s. The plan, per the suits, was to follow Wulfgar, who was big and blond and very Conan The Barbarian which is, I should note, way more the vibe of D&D than LOTR much as we (D&D players) are loathe to admit it. However, Wulfgar had brains made out of one of the boring adult cereals: dull, and only slightly more fibrous than the fun cereals like Honey Bunches of Oats. Meanwhile, Drizzt, his drow buddy, fucking ruled. And so, after writing three very sword-and-sorcery (or more accurately, scimitar-and-wizardry) books, Salvatore returned to fill in Drizzt's backstory. And thus we begin in Homeland.

Drizzt Do'Urden is a drow, or dark elf, which in this setting are almost universally evil because they worship Lolth the spider queen. Is this Not Great? Yes. I also am reading The Wheel of Time, which is Even Worse About Biology As Destiny. The main purpose of this book is to cover Drizzt's childhood from when he leaves the underground drow city of Menzoberranzan.

Drizzt's mother is called Malice, unironically. The naming of drow makes no fucking sense, while we're at it; Malice, Zaknafein, SiNaFay, and Alton DeVir are all supposed to be from the same language? I'm not buying it. ANYWAY. Drow society is matriarchal bc spiders and because, as this post says, Salvatore REALLY wanted to be stepped on. Drizzt was born the third son, and was going to be sacrificed to Lolth because third sons are useless. His birth was ALSO being used by Malice to fuel an attack on House DeVir, because if you slaughter a whole-ass house in Menzoberranzan it's admirable of you, bc ontologically evil; and Lolth powers are increased by childbirth or some jazz.

Several important things happen here, pretty much all simultaneously, heralding Our Chosen One (Drizzt):

The attack on House DeVir goes super well for House Do'Urden

The second oldest brother, Dinin, kills his wizard elder brother (known as the elderboy by the creative geniuses of Menzoberranzan) which means Drizzt can survive because they need a replacement wizard boy.

We learn that Drizzt's father (one of Malice's several consorts) is Zaknafein, who fucking hates his life and how shitty drow society is but also is really good at murder and so he kind of hangs out doing that for House Do'Urden

A wizard who melted his face off fails to kill Alton DeVir, the last of the house of DeVir, which means technically House Do'Urden's attack was illegitimate. However, Masoj Hun'ett, of another powerful house, kills the faceless wizard and Alton takes the wizard's place, but desires VENGEANCE.

Drizzt has lavender eyes but is not blind. His eye color will come up approximately a zillion times. I considered counting, but trust me it's SO many.

The rest of the book covers the following, roughly in order:

Drizzt is super good at everything from a young age; he is placed in the care of his only full sibling, Vierna. Zak manages to successfully argue that Drizzt's dexterity is SO good that he HAS to be a fighter and not a wizard, which permits him to train Drizzt, who is, as discussed, good at everything. He almost mercy-kills him before school because he'd rather his son die innocent than become a drow, but also he hates the idea of killing a child, and also Drizzt is a really good fighter, and so it doesn't happen. They depart on bad terms though.

Drizzt then goes to fighter school (instead of wizard school) and is an excellent fighter but not naturally deceptive and backstabbing because he is Pure of Heart; he is constantly skirting trouble by asking such questions as "why do we all want to murder each other all the time though" and "why is our graduation ceremony a drug fueled spider goddess orgy"

Masoj and Alton scheme; Alton eventually learns in a hoisted by his own petard way that the faceless wizard was also of house Hun,ett, and that house is willing to help him strike back at house Do'Urden

Masoj has a magic panther named Guenhwyvar who likes Drizzt more than him.

Drizzt goes on a surface raid and fucking loves the surface, and feels bad about murdering the surface elves, so he fakes the brutal slaughter of an elven girl. Lolth sees this and doesn't like it one bit and blames the whole house.

Drizzt proves himself on other patrols, and realizes Masoj Hun'ett keeps trying to fucking kill him, notably on a patrol where they run into deep gnomes (svirfneblin). Drizzt spares one of them as well. Dinin is growing suspicious.

Malice realizes that Lolth is mad and assumes it's Zaknafein, known problem, but Lolth tells her someone already knows

Drizzt tells her about Masoj, under questioning

Drizzt and Zak reunite and realize they are kindred spirits who are like "wait our society is MAD fucked up and miserable" and excitedly decide to run away and stop being miserable, BUT Malice is Scrying on them the whole time.

Drizzt goes out to clear his mind and gets cornered by Masoj and Alton. They try to kill him. Joke's on them! Drizzt kills Masoj, Alton's own wand blows up and kills him, and Drizzt gets the panther.

HOWEVER joke is also on Drizzt because Malice approaches Zak and tells him she's going to murder Drizzt, to which Zak tells her to kill him instead. She does so.

Drizzt learns of this and runs away.

The entire book is threaded through with Drizzt's first person reflections, which are actually quite touching at times but also definitely kind of overwrought so I do keep reading them as if they are Sex and the City/Scrubs/Winona Ryder in the 80s (Beetlejuice, Heathers) diary entries

And so our stage is set. If I recall correctly book two is "you have your father's morals; and his tendency towards clinical depression" so we're going to have a rollicking good time (genuine).

[dru-plays-starbound]

Home That Our Feet May Leave, But Not Our Hearts

Universe: Starbound CW: Swearing, deliberate tense switching Words: 3212 Context: Started for August's monthly prompt: "Home". Finished for the Woe, Cubes be Upon Ye Protectorate Event. Title is from The Poet at the Breakfast Table by Oliver Wendell Holmes Sr. Concrit welcome. Or read on AO3 Tag list (ask for +/-): @jacquesfindswritingandadvice, @writeblrsupport

Somewhere, an alarm is chirping incessantly. Mio pulls the covers up, trying to drown out the sound. "Cadet." The voice has an electronic cadence, devoid of emotion. "Cadet, wake up. I calculate a 99% chance that you will be late if you don't get up now." Mio throws the covers back. "SAIL?" "No. This is your other automated assistant, LIAS." The delivery is almost deadpan. "Oh, very funny," Mio replies, equally deadpan. "You know, I regret ever installing that sarcasm module. Just my luck it was unstable…" The air is the first thing she notices – it's fresh and clear, devoid of the synthetic smell recycled air carries. The light is bright and warm, reflecting off light grey and orange walls. Mio nictitates. "SAIL, what day is it?" SAIL's audio crackles as it plays a snippet from an old movie, "Why, it's Christmas Day!" "Ocean Tides, SAIL!" Mio runs a hand over her face. "Mio, are you unwell? Did you somehow forget today is your graduation day?"

Mio fumbles out of bed and stares at the room. "I think I'm dreaming…" The sunset postcard and hula girl Lonny got from xir sister. Goldwall's maintenance manuals next to Chian's trashy romance novels next to Mio's textbooks. Xilli's turtle plush, Fabian's guitar… It's all exactly as Mio remembers, right down to Chian's clothes spilling out of the drawers. Mio pulls the turtle plush off its shelf, crushing it against her chest. She can feel the soft pile, feel it tickle the membranes of her hands. It even has the little worn spot on the top of its paw that they all rubbed for luck or anxiety. Mio finds herself thumbing it even now. This doesn't feel like a dream, and yet… "SAIL, what the fuck is going on?"

"Mio, I am concerned. I know you have been looking forward to graduation day; however, I recommend you forgo the ceremony and instead get checked out by the medical team." "I feel fine, SAIL. I'm just…" Already the lines are blurring. "I'm confused. I had a dream? The craziest dream. The Protectorate was gone, the Earth was destroyed… I met Grand Protector Bright, and she had me collecting these relics…" Mio shakes her head. "Your vitals seem normal," SAIL says, though its tone is reluctant. "If you are to make Graduation, you must hurry." "Right." So Mio shakes off the remnants of her confusion and hurries. Bathroom ablutions are done in haste, her uniform – perfect from where it was laid out the night before – is donned, and she grabs a slice of cold toast Xilli has left out for her, chewing as she rushes through the halls.

Lonny is the first to see her. Xe waves and laughs as Mio is hustled in with her group. They may be Dorm B, but their outstanding performance means they graduate first. As a diplomat, Mio is their team leader and is hustled right to the front of the queue. "Anxious. Hurry, Mio. The ceremony is about to start," Goldwall says, nudging her through. "Why isss Mio sso late?" Chian hisses as Mio passes. "I had a bizarre dream. SAIL was this close to shocking me awake." Xilli clacks her beak. "Tell us about it later. Did you manage to eat something?" "Yes. I found the toast, thank you!" Xilli nuzzles Mio's fronds. "Someone's got to take care of our Captain." "Not Captain!" Fabian chuckles, his eyes dancing. "Not yet." Because they all know it's coming, Mio thinks as she stands proud at the front of the line, straightening her uniform. The six of them will be deployed to join an existing crew, and in a few years they'll get their own ship, and then she'll be Captain.

There's applause as Grand Protector Portia steps up to the podium and begins her speech. A sense of déjà vue floods over Mio, like she's heard these words before. "Today, in the name of peace," Portia is saying. Mio's stomach clenches, dread and fear rising. She shakes her head. "You okay?" Fabian whispers into her ear. "I feel strange," Mio whispers back. Fabian squeezes her shoulder. "It's just-" he starts, but a rumble interrupts him. "Huh?" Mio moves instinctively, like she's done this dance before. She spins, shoving Fabian hard. A chunk of concrete drops from the ceiling between them. "Mio!" "Run!" she screams back.

There is nowhere to go but the stage. Mio's running, scooping the Matter Manipulator up, even as Portia, wrapped in the huge tentacle of some giant beast, is shouting at her to run. She's chased down the corridors by screams and the noise of ripping infrastructure, and arrives on the shuttle pad as smaller tentacles worm their way through the building towards her.

SAIL guides her to a waiting hylotl ship, something she can reliably pilot, and she shoves the AI into the ship's waiting port. As Mio runs the start-up procedures, she can't help but wish Lonny was here next to her. Xe's a far better pilot than she is. Her heart twists. She left her crew. Her family. Her love. "Cadet, I have released the shuttle and plotted a route away from the planet. You may launch." Mio's hand wavers. "Mio. Launch." She hits the ignition, and they rise through the atmosphere. "Engaging FTL… Now!" In her haste, Mio has forgotten her seatbelt. She's slammed back into her seat, then forward. Her head hits the console, and everything goes dark.

–

Mio wakes with a start, jerking upright, and leaping away from a bed. "SAIL?" she calls, voice tight with panic "Good morning," comes the AI's modulated voice. "Where are we?" "Mio?" SAIL sounds worried. "You are in your dormitory at the Terrene Protectorate Academy." "But we-" Mio turns frantically. Golden light reflects off orange and white walls. "There was-" She pulls the turtle plush down from the shelf, crushing it against her chest and thumbing at the bare spot on its paw. "What the fuck?" "You were dreaming, Mio," SAIL says. "I was just about to wake you. If you do not hurry, you'll be late for your graduation." "The graduation!" Mio's eyes widen. "Tides, I have to warn them! Where's Grand Protector Portia?" "She's currently in her quarters. Mio, what are you talking about?" The turtle plush is thrown onto Xilli's bed as Mio runs out of the room, still in her PJs. "Get Fabian on comms. Tell him to grab the crew and our families and get to a shuttle now." "Mio, I understand the last term has been stressful for you-" "Damnit, SAIL! Just do it!"

Mio slides to a halt in front of the Grand Protector's quarters. Taking a breath, she straightens her pyjama top. From within comes Portia's muffled voice, "For over 500 years, we have stood honourably… No, no. We have stood proud…" Mio rings the bell, and the door hisses open. "Blast, is it time already?" Portia asks. Her white hair is neatly swept back, and her ceremonial uniform is missing the golden epaulettes. She's mistaken Mio for her escort. "Ma'am, no. I'm not here to take you to the ceremony. I'm here to take you to safety." "I beg your pardon?" "My name is Mio. I'm a final-year cadet. This will sound crazy, I'm sure, and I can't explain how I know, but we're going to be attacked." Mio swallows. "You'll say 'we welcome our newest compatriots, and present each of them with our greatest tool' and then a giant tentacle will kill you. Please, I must get you to safety." Portia waits for a second, then laughs. "I commend you, Cadet Mio. Usually, the pranks are after the ceremony. I think this is one for the history books." "Ma'am, please. This isn't a prank. Earth is going to be destroyed. I'm trying to warn you!" Portia gives Mio an indulgent smile. "Listen, Cadet. This is one of the more unique and inventive stories I've been given in my tenure as Grand Protector, so I applaud you for that. But I need to finish getting ready. Come and find me afterwards, eh?" Portia turns away, but Mio sticks her foot in the door. She knows she's not being very diplomatic, but the panic for what's going to happen seems to have robbed her good sense. "Ma'am," Mio says firmly. "There's not going to be an after if we don't act now!" "That's enough, Cadet." Portia has a shock weapon in her hand. Mio can already anticipate what's going to happen but knows she still has to try. She takes a step into the Grand Protector's quarters. "Ma'am, please-" Mio's whole body locks up, muscles frozen from the electrical discharge Portia's just struck her with. Mio hits the ground, and everything goes dark.

–

"Cadet. Cadet, wake up." Mio lies in the bed for a moment longer, ignoring the alarm, ignoring SAIL's prodding to rise. Her gaze flits over her surrounds – orange walls, warm sunlight, yellow bedspread – and she sighs. "Hush, SAIL. I'm getting up," Mio says. Mio dresses, eats both slices of the cold toast, and rubs the turtle plush's paw. "It is quite impressive that you can remain so serene when you are running so late. Well done you," SAIL says. Mio says nothing in response, only gives a grim little smile as she exits the dormitory.

"Mio, where are you going?" SAIL says. "The main hall is in the other direction." "I know. Please get Fabian on comms. Tell him to round up the crew and our families, and get them to a shuttle immediately." Mio runs a fond hand over the orange panelling. "Tell him I'm sorry, I won't be joining them." "The message has been sent. Mio, I am concerned. It is unlike you to behave so irrationally." Mio stops at a door, and prises off the keypad's face, fiddling with its innards as Chian taught her. "If something happens once, that's a fluke," she says to SAIL, as she works on the lock mechanism. "If it happens a second time, it's a coincidence. But once something happens a third time, it's a pattern. Agreed?" "Agreed," comes SAIL's cautious assessment. "Then I'm stuck in some kind of time loop. In just under an hour, an eldritch creature is going to obliterate Earth. I don't know why or how this is happening to me, but I've got a chance to stop the beast, so I'm going to take it."

The door hisses open and lights flicker on as Mio walks into a room filled with stacks of weapons and munitions. She walks directly to a cage in the back and picks the lock. "Mio, are you sure you didn't just have a dream?" Mio snorts as she finds what she's looking for – a monstrosity in black and shiny grey. "Yes, SAIL, I had a dream. My dream was to graduate with my friends. To go to the afterparty and introduce my girlfriend to my parents. To have my mother be proud of me. "My dream was to go into space with the people I've spent the last four years training with, to lead them to bold new horizons and share their adventures. "Instead, I end up stranded, Tides' knows where, on a dead ship, all alone. My home, destroyed. Everyone I cared about, murdered. I had to claw my life back, block by block." Mio shoulders the rocket launcher. "The Ruin destroyed my dream. The fuck am I letting it happen again."

It takes longer than Mio would like to get up to the hatch beside the Hall's dome, and many strange looks, but she pulls on the harness, hooks herself onto the safety rail, and starts the climb. The dome is the highest place on the Academy campus. She only knows how to get up here because Whip brought her one morning to watch the sunrise. It had been magical – the golden sunlight glittering off the Thames, turning it into a ribbon of molten gold, and Whip's warm arm around her, protecting her from the wind. The city, unblemished, spreads out before her now, as Mio sets up the rocket launcher. There're no strong, warm arms this time to protect her from the racing wind, and she has to brace herself against the safety rail. SAIL has long since stopped complaining; she can only hope it hasn't sent for Security forces.

The Ruin appears in the blink of an eye. One moment all is serene – the next, the sky is filled with smoke, debris and banded purple tentacles. Through the darkness, Mio sees the glint of something vast and yellow. She aims and fires the rocket launcher. There is an unholy screech. Thick tentacles reach out for her, but she fires again, blasting them apart. The dome shakes. Mio loses her footing. She drops the Ex Machina and watches it skitter away. Something strikes her back. Mio feels the taut safety line snap, and she's plunging towards the edge of the dome. She falls, and everything goes black.

–

An alarm chirps. "Cadet-" "Fuck off, SAIL," Mio says, rolling over. "I'm sick."

An hour later, the building shakes. Mio is knocked out of bed. Goldwall's toolbox falls off a shelf and hits her on the head. Everything goes dark.

–

"Cadet-" "I had a dream that told me not to graduate today," Mio tells SAIL before it can get any further chivvying her awake. She dresses, eats her toast, and tidies the dormitory. As she's putting Chian's clothes away, Mio smiles, thinking of Freya's tendency to drop her clothes wherever.

Mio takes her time strolling down the corridor, chatting to the graduate students. She fixes the vending machine using a trick Nobu taught her, helps the janitor clear the walkway of blossoms – not unlike sweeping flour from Sparkfoot's galley – and sits under the tree, listening to the second-year recite poetry that reminds her of Sakura's. Mio stays on the bench after the second-year leaves, admiring the view and thinking that Kata would like the wind chimes. Then the beast comes. The tree is uprooted, and a falling branch knocks her unconscious.

–

The alarm that woke her was the warning blare of defective machinery. Rather than 'Cadet', SAIL was crying, "Captain! Captain!" The air that greeted her nose was stale, her vision wavering and tinted green as she stared through the darkness at the orange shape flitting distantly. Mio twisted, looking around, trying to figure out where she was. Another flicker, white this time, and closer too. "She's waking up! Get her out of there!" "The mechanism's bust. We'll need to get her out manually." The voices were muted, as if coming through thick glass, or water. Mio nictitated. She pressed her hands against a wall of glass. A tank? Why, by the Ocean Tides, was she in a tank? "Guys!" "I'll do it." Another figure resolved out of the wavering darkness, unmistakably a hylotl by their cyan and lavender markings. Their webbed hands and feet clung to the outside of the tank as they climbed it. Metal reverberated against metal, making the tank shake. Mio gripped the walls, fearful of ending up crushed and cut. But the tank didn't fall. The top was removed, and the other hylotl slid in with her. «Leader,» said the hylotl. Mio nictitated. It had been so long since she'd heard the underwater language, that she struggled to understand them for a moment. «What this?» Mio asked. «Rescue.» The hylotl smiled, achingly familiar. Mio was sure she knew this one, but like spume in a storm, their name escaped her. «Hold still. Many points to remove.» «Points?» The hylotl reached up to her head and pulled something off Mio's scalp. Mio screamed, the tank fluid filling with bubbles as she fought to get away from the searing pain. «Leader, leader, wait,» the other tried to soothe. «No! Pain! Pain!» The other launched themself up, leaning over the top of the tank. "Fife, do you have something that can help?" "Try this." The one in white hands a tube of something to the other. "It's a cream that should make the electrodes come off easier."

Mio's mind whirled as the other hylotl massaged the cream into her fronds, lifting the electrodes from her skull. Fife… Fife is a medic. Fife is her medic. The orange blob resolved itself into the form of an avian… Xictli, Mio's second in command. That makes the hylotl… «Youko.» It's not possible to whisper underwater, so zir attention was on her instantly. «Yes?» Mio nictitated. «Nothing. Continue.» As ze went back to the business of freeing Mio from whatever contraption she'd fallen into, Mio can't help but feel a fluttering in her chest. This is her crew. Her family. They came to rescue her, to take her back to her ship, which she captains. Mio put a hand to her head. Her memories are all so jumbled.

Finally, Youko was done. Ze helped her from the tank and into Xictli and Fife's waiting arms. "What happened?" Mio asked as Fife looked her over. "Your last reported position was just outside this facility." SAIL's words were perfunctory, but its tone was fretful. "You declared your intent to investigate an abandoned apex research facility and shortly afterwards your comms died. I waited three hours, planet time, per our standard procedure, then alerted the crew to your disappearance." "When we arrived," Xictli said, "the place was not as abandoned as expected. We can only surmise you were taken by surprise, captured, and put in this… contraption. I'm sorry it took us so long to find you." "How long?" "A few days." "I can see your vitals are stable," SAIL said, "and aside from some malnutrition, you have no outward signs of injury. Doctor, do you concur?" "I'll do a full diagnostic back on the ship," Fife said. "But from initial evidence, I concur. How do you feel?" Mio opened her mouth, then shut it again and shook her head. "That's fine," Fife said. "It's alright to be confused. I can't imagine what they were doing to you." Yon smiled gently. "Let's get you back home." Mio recoiled. "What?" "To… to the ship?" Fife frowned and glanced at Xictli. "I'm going to need a full workup on what that machine was doing." Xictli ground her beak, hands curling into fists. "I'll bring a team back down after the Captain is safe." Mio closed her eyes briefly. "The base is Miniknog. It's thought reassignment R&D. What-" Her voice stuck in her throat. "What was the programme set to?" Xictli and Youko shared a look. "To assess the subject's perception of 'Home'," Xictli said. Mio nictitated rapidly, flaring her gills. "Of course it fucking was," she said with a choked laugh.

As they rose through the floors of the underground lab, Mio watched her team work on her extraction. They might not be the crew she thought she'd have, and they may not have been the ones she wanted. Nonetheless, they were her crew, the ones she'd chosen, bit by bit. She cared for them – shared their adventures, their triumphs and tribulations. They had, she realised, become as much of a family as her first crew; and her ship as much of a home as the Terrene Protectorate.

[newtonsheffield]

As I am currently lying in my own bed not well 😷😷 with my Hedwig Hot Water bottle curtesy of my hubby to be I got inspired to ask this about my fave couple 🥰

We’ve seen Kate and Anthony being the patient and the “doctor”

And in AOFAG obvs Soph takes care of a Ben when he gets sick... do you have any of Benophie taking care of one another when bed bound sick or hurt?

❤️

Hiiii!

First of all: I Hope you’re feeling better! I was off work last week with a cold and now I feel like I’m getting another one. There’s been a lot of rain recently in Queensland and because I’ve been constantly in and out of the rain and the air conditioning, I think I keep catching a chill like the heroine of a regency novel. Very tiring because I have to get a covid test every time

Now I’ve had another prompt very similar here so I’m answering them together! 

Anon asked: i binged b&s in one day !!!! it's soooooo good 🤍 and i love the mini fics you post here 🤍 do you have any head canons for when benophie when sophie gets sick for the first time since they got together? Hello! You binged it all in a day? Oh God, I’m so sorry, that’s a lot of my writing in one day. But I’m glad you enjoyed it, and welcome to this little black hole that I call a blog. 

Okay, I feel like we all know that Sophie Beckett is one nurturing son of a gun, so Benedict is welllllll taken care of when he gets sick. But I think it would be difficult for Sophie, who has had no who would take care of her to let him do it? 

Anywayyyyy Let’s see

Sophie Beckett prided herself on rarely being sick and even when she was, she never took a sick day. She showed up to work rain, hail, or shine, hopped up on Day Nurse and a throat lozenge and she didn’t complain. Not that she didn’t wish she could crawl into bed and quietly die, but it wasn’t an option. When she’d worked at Penwood House she hadn’t really had any sick leave, and she couldn’t have afforded to not work. But it was fine, she wasn’t really the kind of person that got sick regularly anyway, maybe twice a year she’d have a cold for a few days and that was easy enough to manage. And then four months into their relationship Benedict had woken up with a cold.

The sound of his sneeze had woken Sophie up first, and she’d sat up a little startled and turned to find Ben with a box of tissues on his chest, his eyes red, sniffling. His voice sounded stuffy when he said Sorry, you should go, I don’t want to get you sick. Sophie had tutted disapprovingly before she could stop herself and stood from the bed with a Ridiculous man before going into the bathroom, rummaging through his cabinet and returning with some paracetamol and a glass of water. Take these and go back to sleep, I’ll have to go and get some things but I’ll be back. He’d looked up at her, a little startled, but clearly thought the expression on her face left no room for arguments as he settled back against his pillows. She spent the rest of the day with his head cushioned against her chest her fingers running through his hair as he slept soundly against her with a muffled Love you, Soph. And her heart had stuttered away brimming with happiness despite the situation, content in that moment to have made him happy. 

2 days later Sophie woke up in her own bed and her head was pounding, her sinuses were congested and she couldn’t help but groan as she looked in the mirror at her bloodshot eyes and quietly cursed as she took her medication and went about getting ready for the day. She had been at work for approximately 30 minutes when the head chef sighed and said Sophie go home. Sophie had tried to argue but the chef laughed and said At this point I’m honestly worried you’ll give the customers the plague. You have some sick days they’re there for you to use. And she’d said it with such kindness that Sophie had honestly wanted to cry as she’d left, desperately looking forward to sinking back between the bedsheets. 

Benedict hadn’t really thought much of it. He’d been finishing a shoot, and sent Sophie a text, asking if she wanted to go to his brother’s later, Greg had a new something or other he was excited about playing medieval farm building game maybe?, not expecting a response straight away. He was fairly used to Sophie replying intermittently throughout the day, not being able to have her phone on her at all times. But she’d responded almost immediately Not tonight, Have fun though and he’d frowned a little at the blunt response, no explanation given. Deciding to lighten the mood he said Shouldn’t you be at work? Hiding in the bathroom again? 😏 And the response had come back again almost immediately No, got sent home sick. And Benedict had frozen, on his way out the door, camera bag swinging stupidly at his side as he considered the fact that Sophie had woken up unwell this morning, so unwell she’d had to go home and she hadn’t even thought to tell him. And his chest ached when he thought it likely wasn’t due to the fact that she was shutting him out, but because she was so used to not having anyone take care of her, she hadn’t even thought that he would want to.

Sophie was woken from a nap by a sharp knock on the door of her flat. And she couldn’t help but groan, wondering if they would just go away if she ignored them. When the knocking repeated itself she dragged herself out of bed, her head pounding with every step and her heart stopped when she opened the door, to find Ben absolutely ladened down with pharmacy bags. Sorry it took me so long, I didn’t know what you had so I just got some of everything. He said, smiling happily as she shimmied past her frozen in the doorway. setting about putting his bags down, unpacking them, confusion welling in her chest until finally she stuttered out Ben What are you doing here? His head shot up, his eyebrows raised, Taking Care of you? Don’t worry, I’m not about to force my cooking on you, I stopped by my mum’s, she said She hopes you feel better soon. And tears had welled in her eyes as he wrapped his arms tightly around her, warmth and security seeping into her bones. And as he lay next to her in bed for the rest of the afternoon, his voice softly reading Little Women Sophie could barely choke back the words I want to spend the rest of my life with you.      

[maotranslates]

Chapter 2

Novel: Life Going Wild With Plug-ins 带挂装逼, 最为致命 by Shi Zi Qing 十字卿

PREVIOUS / TABLE OF CONTENTS / NEXT

I motioned to the shopkeeper to help me pack him up and leave, and when looking back, I found that person staring at me with open eyes, clear and full of contrast.

So it turns out he wasn’t sleeping.

Nightrunner had a set of registration procedures, which were rather annoying, and had to be confirmed with me numerous times. After handling this process, I waved at that person:

"Let's go."

The expressions of everyone around me seemed rather shocked, and someone muttered: “He is injured so heavily, and has been lying down for so many days, how can he just go when told to go? He’s really met a master just as heartless as the previous one……” 

That person staggered to the wall and got up, shifting his steps closer to me, having an even harder time walking than I was. As he took a break every two steps, I waited very patiently while holding my sleeves.

It took one incense stick’s time to get out of the inn.

It took another one cup of tea’s time to walk past the Shaxian snack shop.

And it took yet another quarter of an hour to walk to the city entrance.

Even my very slow-tempered self felt slightly bothered.

Me: "Can't you walk faster?"

The Shadow Guard's body shook, and he trembled as he knelt down: "This servant ...... is incompetent …… Master, please punish me as you wish."

His voice was hoarse, and every word seemed to be difficult to say.

Could it be?! An idea suddenly flashed through my brain and I felt very smart as I asked, "Are you in pain?"

"I don’t dare." The shadow guard took a deep breath.

"Then let's go." I guess I was wrong......I embarrassedly rubbed my nose, then watched him take a long, long time to get up and continue walking.

After moving two more steps like a snail, I stopped.

I actually had no idea where I should go and what way is good.

The letter only wrote about the task of buying a Shadow Guard, and since I already bought one, I felt that my life goals had already been accomplished, and that I had no concerns.

While meditating on this, I also rubbed my stomach, and the wave of pain made me frown.

"Master ……are you feeling unwell?" The Shadow Guard keenly perceived that something was wrong.

"I've been conspired against, and I don’t have long left to live." I sighed in frustration.

The Shadow Guard was shocked, and said in a low voice, "This servant has committed an offense." Thus, he took up my hand.

Hey, why is a grown man feeling my hand?

The Shadow Guard held my wrist and blanked out for a while, then bowed his head and said, "This servant is incompetent ……I cannot detect Master’s sickness."

I don't blame you, this place is really too sinister.

I gave the Shadow Guard a look full of expectation, waiting for him to guide the direction of my life. The Shadow Guard was baffled by my stare and did not speak for a long time.

Sigh, what are you useful for?

"What am I supposed to do now?" I asked complacently.

The Shadow Guard was suddenly a little nervous, considered it for quite a while, then very cautiously said, "I can only rely on Master’s command."

I only asked you because I have no idea uh…… 

I thought about it, and put it another way: "Ordinary people, what would they do around this time?"

The Shadow Guard went through another internal struggle: "The common people, they would have supper at this time."

Oh right right right, exactly this. I recalled that the physical body indeed needs a daily meal, and feeling reassured, I said, "I’ll leave it to you."

"Yes." The Shadow Guard answered, but didn’t do anything.

The Shadow Guard waited for a while, then raised his head and looked at me.

I also looked at him.

He looked back at me.

The Shadow Guard’s complexion became a bit complicated, and he hesitantly started to speak: "This servant……this servant has just come out of Nightrunner, and with me???? I don’t……have any......"

"I know." Didn't we come out together? Do I look like I have amnesia?

"......" The Shadow Guard looked at me complicatedly for a while, and then said, "Yes. This servant understands."

Then he slowly moved away.

Was it an illusion, or why did he walk slower than even the ordinary people? He should also have taken physical body operation lessons.

I crouched by the river, silently waiting for the sun to go down behind the mountains, and gradually felt that the very poisonous attacks in my body were becoming worse… So painful, oh my god, ​​I’m gonna die, gonna die gonna die gonna die gonna die gonna die.

"Master." Finally hearing the call, I turned my head and saw a staggering figure, walking towards me with a cloth bag. Getting near, he slowly spread the bag on the floor.

I looked at him in the afterglow of the setting sun. Hey, why was there so much water on his face, and also so much mysterious red liquid emerging through his clothes?

I reached out my finger and poked the small fountain.

The Shadow Guard took a breath of air, his face twisted, looking extremely in pain.

I didn't understand what he was in pain for.

"It hurts?" I looked at him with a good-natured smile.

The Shadow Guard clenched his teeth and said, "No."

Alas, I guessed wrong again, I’ve lost.

This loss was very momentary, because I was immediately distracted by the aroma in the bag, and the smell seemed magical, making me feel tickly.

I smelled this flavor in the experience class!!

This, it couldn’t be, the legendary, food!!!

"I'm very… sorry... I only got a pheasant and a few wild fruits, and roughly cooked it, you..."

In our civilization, it is said that food will be addictive. It is similar to drugs, very dangerous, and once you start you cannot stop. This is because you can only eat with a physical body, and maintaining the physical body is a very luxurious activity, let alone controlling the body to eat.

Yet my hands, not even being controlled, reached out as if bewitched.

The Shadow Guard who just turned back with two newly broken branches looked in amazement at the sight of me eating, whispering, "Master, chopsticks..."

Chopsticks, hehe, don't play with me, how would I know such a difficult operation?

Like a strong wind scattering the last clouds, I cleared the roasted pheasant and wild fruits and shed tears out of excitement.

Ancestors are awesome! The physical body is awesome! Wuwuwu.*

*wuwuwu = “cute” crying noises

After finishing everything, I saw the Shadow Guard mutely staring at me, and coughed in embarrassment. Oh no, I forgot to leave some for him, he is also a human, and also needs to eat...

"Are you hungry?" I asked.

The Shadow Guard painfully shook his head.

Oh, not hungry... why do I keep guessing wrong, so depressing.

So it turns out the Shadow Guard doesn’t need to eat, so impressive, really very awesome.

At this time I just realized that the on and off pain in my abdomen had disappeared, and was replaced with a kind of comfortable satisfaction. It dawned on me that the Shadow Guard must have secretly put medicine in the food.

I looked at him sincerely.

The Shadow Guard fell on his knees, "Master, forgive me! This servant could only find this...!"

Sigh... am I that scary ...

I helped him up, then returned to a situation where I didn’t know what to do with myself, so I could only question, "Let me ask you, what do ordinary people do at this time?"

"Master, forgive me!" He fell on his knees again, "It is time for Master to sleep, this servant should die."

Why does me sleeping mean you have to die? I didn’t understand and frowned. "Where to sleep?"

"This servant is ignorant, I didn’t know Master..." He hesitated for a while, "I don't know which family’s residence the Master is from and how to go back."

I thought about it and said, "I'm not from any family and don’t have anywhere to go back."

"...Sorry, this servant has overstepped his boundaries." The Shadow Guard’s complexion looked blue, bewilderedly asking, "Then tonight... rest at the inn?"

"Then let's go."

The Shadow Guard wore a complicated expression and walked with difficulty ahead, and I leisurely followed while humming a little tune.

It was just that oil kept dripping from the side of my mouth, and feeling a little helpless, I reached out my sleeve and wiped it. It was still sticky, not very comfortable, but much better than before.

The Shadow Guard’s expression while looking at me became even more strange for some reason.

There were groups of two or three people eating in the hall of the inn. I looked at them, then thought about the other people I met today, and looked at the Shadow Guard again.

Hm... I keep thinking... The Shadow Guard is not quite the same as everyone else.

Other people's clothes are pieces by pieces of cloth, even if the style is simple, they are neat.

Why are the Shadow Guard’s clothes full of streaks with ragged edges, and blackened and dirtied?

I remember that in my previous fashion history classes, in some eras people would specially make cuts in their jeans to make them look old, which was a trend of the time.

The Shadow Guard is probably keeping up with the fashion trend of this era.

No wonder people keep looking at him and pointing him out.

Although I don't like this tattered postmodern style of clothing, it is clearly a difference between other people and me, I have no right to interfere with other people’s preferences. This creator god is really very democratic.

The owner of the inn came up, looked up and down at my clothes, his gaze stopping at the jade pendant on my waist several times. He smiled until his eyes became narrow, and when he saw my face, the corners of his mouth seemed to twitch.

"Uh, honored guest, are you staying at the inn? What room do you want, how many?"

I felt a little complicated, not knowing how to answer. I could only look at the Shadow Guard.

"One room.” The Shadow Guard’s tone was a bit hesitant, “......how about …...a principal room.” 

Wait a minute, it couldn’t be that he had never stayed at an inn before either?

"Okay~" The boss agreed and looked at the Shadow Guard, full of smiles.

The Shadow Guard looked at me.

Hm? Why are you looking at me?

After waiting for a while, the boss quietly reminded: "Honored guest, first pay a deposit...?"

  ……Oh! I understand! Asking for money! But that’s fucking useless, I don’t have money.

After the Shadow Guard regarded me with a complicated expression, he took a deep breath, as if making a determination, then turned back and said, "Boss, bring a pen and paper."

Hearing this, the boss arranged it for him. When the Shadow Guard finished writing, the boss looked and his whole body shook, his expression becoming extremely respectful.

"So it is that lord's... Waiter! Quickly send these two noble guests upstairs!"

Eh! Writing can be spent as money! My Shadow Guard is so great!

I glanced at the Shadow Guard with admiration, intending to wait until we arrived in the room to praise him, but his complexion suddenly became very unsightly.

The boss finished arranging the room and looked at the Shadow Guard while whispering, "Young master, your follower’s wounds are not light, should I call a doctor?"

I frowned and looked at the Shadow Guard: "Who told you he was hurt?"

Unexpectedly, when I just finished speaking, the boss knelt down in fear. "My humble self has spoken too much! I should die! Young master, please spare my life!"

…..why are each and every one of you like this? Why are you all forcibly acting like I’m a serial killer...

I went into the room depressed, and saw the bed I had once seen in a museum. In our civilization, the source files of consciousness are stored in network containers while we rest, so the idea that such a simple wooden board in front of me could restore physical strength is seriously amazing.

Do I just lie down on it...

"I deeply apologize for my incompetence, with this unwise decision, you can only stay for two or three days ...Master, please punish me."

I frowned: "You did pretty well, I was even going to praise you."

The Shadow Guard’s face was deathly pale.

I sat on the bed and shook it a few times, finding that the bedding was actually soft, when I saw the Shadow Guard conscientiously crouching in the corner. "What are you doing over there?"

"...I apologize for my incompetence, this servant is a Shadow Guard, who should be guarding the Master in an unseen place, not obstructing the owner's eyes. But... my lowly body is very unsuitable, without the strength to jump on the roof beams..."

Oh, was my Shadow Guard born with a disability?

Being disabled and still engaging in a high risk occupation as a bodyguard, this really must be a strong will in a disabled body.

I smiled at him approvingly. The Shadow Guard fell in fear.

"Won’t you come up?" I patted the quilt.

"...I won’t." The corners of the Shadow Guard’s mouth twitched.

It seems that he likes crouching in the corner and doesn’t like sleeping in bed. I never force anyone to do anything, so I let him be, pulling the covers over me and lying down.

The jewelry I wore jingled together, wearing both gold and jade... it was really pressing quite uncomfortably and unbearable.

I recalled today's unfavorable situation and did not feel very great. I am the creator god of this world, coming here with a plug-in, thinking I would be a big plug-in user who could cover the sky with one hand. Instead, unable to find the golden finger switch, I am just a little defeated thing that is not even as good as the common people.

I don't know what can support me to survive in this sinister Jianghu.* I don’t have a friend in the world, not even two sticks to rub together, what’s left is only... my... good looks… sigh.

*Jianghu = land of rivers and lakes, the martial world

After reaching this place, I couldn't help but feel depressed.

PREVIOUS / TABLE OF CONTENTS / NEXT

[dogtrainingofficial]

10 Reasons Why Your Dog Ignores Your Commands

Is your dog giving you deaf ears? When this happens, avoid repeating the command over and over and imposing yourself until you get a response; instead, take a step back and consider the following scenarios which are some of the most common issues encountered when training dogs.

1) Low Value Treats: Are Your Treats Worth Working For?

It’s a romantic and hard to debunk myth that dogs work for us just to please us. In reality, as opportunistic beings, dogs are most likely thinking “what’s in it for me?” according to the Association of Pet Dog Trainers (APDT). The right use of treats can really make the difference between a dog who is eager to work and one who couldn’t care less. The use of low-value treats (such as kibble) can be detrimental if your dog isn’t excited by them, especially during the initial stages of learning or when there are distractions around, so make sure your treats are worthy of attention.

Also remember to stick to treats which are soft, smelly, and in small bite-sized pieces. This allows your dog to quickly gobble up the reward and focus his attention back on you, rather than being distracted by a longer-lasting treat.

A suggestion? Try to use what respected veterinarian, trainer and writer Dr. Ian Dunbar calls the Ferrari of dog treats: Freeze-dried liver.

2) Low Rate of Reinforcement: Are You Missing Out on Rewarding?

In the initial stages of learning or when there are lots of distractions around, your dog may find sniffing the grass, looking around, marking territory and pulling on the leash more rewarding than training. Why is that? It’s probably because there are stimuli that are extra interesting and are worth paying more attention to. If your dog has received little training in the past, he may have been doing this for a good part of his life. Increasing the rate of reinforcement during this time by giving your dog more treats for his training efforts may help to motivate him, and will teach him to pay more attention to you than to the distracting environmental stimuli.

A low rate of reinforcement can also cause your dog to get frustrated and give up trying; remember, during the initial stages of learning you need a continuous rate of reinforcement (giving rewards for every success), and only once your dog shows signs of responding well can you move on to a variable schedule (only giving treats for success every now and then).

3) High Criteria: Are You Asking Too Much at Once?

This is where the saying “be a splitter and not a lumper” comes into play. It is often tempting to try to teach new behaviors all at once in a single evening. When your dog stops working for you, you start thinking: “Am I asking for too much at once?” Truth is, often when dogs fail to respond to a command it is because it is too hard for them. So try not to ramp up the difficulty too quickly; rather, break the objective down into several attainable steps to help your dog succeed. As an example, if you were trying to train your dog to touch the tip of a target stick with his nose, you could reward him for touching ANY part of the stick at first. Over time once your dog gets a hang of this, you could then move on to rewarding him only for touching the rounded tip at the top of the stick.

Try your best to prevent your dog’s progress from stalling, and do not make your training sessions too long – keep them short and sweet!

4) High Level of Distractions: Is there too Much Going on?

Dogs learn best when there are little to no distractions around, so be sure to start your training sessions in a quiet room where there is not much going on.

Once your dog is able to perform the behavior in the quiet room, build from there and gradually start asking your dog to perform the behavior in a noisier room. Then, progress to the yard, a busy street, the dog park and so forth.

If you start on a busy street or at the dog park right away, your dog may not respond because you have not yet built a foundation for the behavior.

5) Lack of Training: Has Your Dog Ever Been Trained Before?

If the handler has a history of being inconsistent and not following through with the dog, there’s a chance the dog may have learned he could get away from certain behaviors and has learned to ignore the handler. Dogs who have never been trained and have been allowed to do as they please for a good part of their lives often find the initial stages of learning difficult, since the concept is entirely new to them. It is up to the handler to become interesting and worth listening to by investing in reward-based training methods, like the ones taught in Adrienne Farricelli’s Brain Training for Dogs course.

6) Unclear Cues: Are You Confusing Your Dog?

Dogs thrive on consistency, so make sure you always use the same command cue and that all other people training the dog are on the same page. If you ask for a command and your dog just stares at you, consider if that command has a history of being used consistently.

In classes, it is not uncommon to encounter a family where the wife uses “come” to call the dog, the husband uses the dog’s name, and the kids just say “here!” Don’t ask for behaviors in multiple ways, and make sure your body language is congruent with the verbal command. Dogs find body language more salient then verbal cues.

Also, try your best not to repeat commands over and over, otherwise your dog will learn not to listen to the first time you say it, but will wait for you to finish your sentence instead!

7) Frustration Buildup: Are you Getting Frustrated?

Dogs are masters in body language and they can easily detect frustration. When the handler’s frustration builds up, dogs often shut down instead of becoming more compliant. In this case, it helps to ask the dog for a behavior he knows well (such as a sit) followed by a reward to end the session on a positive note. You can try the exercise again a little bit later, possibly further splitting the exercise into smaller sections if it was too hard for your dog.

Also, keep in mind that if you start raising your voice, bending down or getting into your dog’s face, you are intimidating him dog and he will feel the need to send you appeasement signals and default behaviors, rather than listening to your commands.

8) Emotional Problems: Are Emotions Getting in the Way?

If a dog is fearful, anxious or nervous, his emotional state may interfere with training. This is because the dog is often in a fight or flight state which affects his cognitive function, impairing his ability to learn. In such a case, you may need to work in areas where your dog is less likely to be frightened and then gradually introduce more and more stimuli in a way which does not cause him to react.

As an example, if your dog was frightened of thunder, instead of immediately exposing him to recordings of thunderstorms on full volume, you should first play them at a very low volume, where he acknowledges the sound but does not become scared. After rewarding your dog while the sound is played, you would, over time and numerous training sessions, increase the volume at which you play the recording. This process is known as desensitization and is a common technique used in dog training.

9) Health Considerations: Is Your Dog in Pain or Uncomfortable?

If your dog ignores you, he may be feeling unwell or uncomfortable. If your dog has always been obedient and is now slacking off, it is best to have your veterinarian rule out any medical problems. Sloppy sits or a reluctance to lay down may be indicative of orthopedic problems.

Aside from medical problems, some dogs may not like to be trained on certain surfaces, or perhaps the weather is too hot, too windy or too cold – there are a multitude of possibilities. Often, a distracted dog may simply need to relieve himself or get a drink of water. Consider how well you could perform in an exam if you were busting to use the bathroom!

10) Are You Forgetting to Brain Train Your Dog?

Many owners are not aware of this, but when it comes to dogs, idle minds are the devil’s workshop. Yet many owners are happy to leave their dogs bored by the fireplace all day, leading to untold behavior problems. The simple secret to a well-trained dog is engaging their mind and getting them thinking.

In the wild, before domestication, dogs would spend much of their lives performing tasks necessary for survival. Even in more modern history, dogs had special roles to perform in their relationships with humans. You can still see these natural drives in dogs today! For example, you will notice how beagles love to follow scents, how some terrier breeds love to dig, and how treeing coonhounds bark upon noticing prey up a tree. Unlike humans who perhaps dread the 9 to 5 grind, dogs actively WANT to work, and when they do not, they become prone to behavior problems, disobedience, and poor psychological well-being. Many owners spend THOUSANDS on dog training when the solution could be as simple as providing Rover with more mental stimulation!

Fortunately, Brain Training for Dogs offers a solution to this problem. Written by professionally certified trainer Adrienne Farricelli CPDT-KA (who’s work has appeared in USA Today, Everydog Magazine, Nest Pets and more), Brain Training for Dogs is one of the first training programs to not only teach obedience, better behavior, important skills and tricks, but to also work on increasing intelligence and engaging the dog’s brain too. Through 21 fun and simple games, the novel and scientifically-proven methods taught by Adrienne are sure to improve the lives of both you and your dog! By the end of Brain Training for Dogs your dog will be able to tidy up his toys, play the piano (yes, really), and identify his toys by name – all while being a better behaved and more obedient dog.

Want to get started with brain training? You can check out my course by clicking here:

>>>Get brain training for dogs today

As seen, there are many reasons why your dog may not be listening to you. Don’t quickly label your dog as stubborn, don’t begin shouting commands like a drill sergeant, and don’t give up training altogether – instead, try to give your dog a break and consider what may really be going on. A better understanding of how dogs learn should pave the path to better training.

Hope this helps!

[faireladypenumbra]

Writing in 2020: Some Reflections on Creativity, Depression, and The Last Four Years

When I first started writing seriously in 2012, I declared on my earliest drafts that I would never write with the intention of publication.

This might seem odd coming from a 19-year-old whose only claim to fame by this point, were a couple a popular fanfic. I was worried then, as I began to shape up my first original novel (a half-written steampunk time-travel book that will never ever see the light of day) that the active chase that was publication would kill my relationship with writing.

The relationship I had with writing at the time was still very young, but I have always used the metaphorical well to describe where my energy to write comes from. There is a well somewhere in my brain, and in that well is all the imagery and beauty and terror that I can draw out into my works. This as a sacred space, from which That well is still the image I picture if I am conjuring some physical embodiment of my writing, or what my process might look like. It’s eight years since I started this journey, and I have watched my well diminish over the past four years in a quiet circling of the drain. It is not that the desire to write is gone, but the thing that connected my brain and my work is less palpable than it was before. It’s a complicated idea to venture on as well, knowing I still occasionally write fiction and still write a great deal academically. But there are many days when ever those parts of writing have become a trial of self-doubt and struggle.

“This is just a part of writing,” I tell myself for the hundredth time- but by this time, I’m not even really writing, and just considering the idea of making time for myself and my art makes me ill.

It is in these times that I realize how much damage- not just the pursual of publication, but the active work I did in publication, did to my process.

I: The Public- And My Complicated Relationship With It.

I really like the public, first off, and I like sharing my work to the public when I have the absolute confidence to do so. Chimehour was one of those times, in 2015, when I first emerged on Inkitt quietly. The site was still small- barely creeping over 15,000 members when I joined, so I had a fair amount of confidence that my work would be safe here.

It was. And it was not, all at once. I was revived by every good review I got, and the encouragement pushed me to finish my novel properly and even push back my release deadline. I tried to actually edit the book and revise it properly before I either released or queried it, which was a good call.

Around the fall of 2015 though, my relationship with the website and the community became something negative. Not bad, just… counter-intuitive to creativity. 2015 was a hard year beforehand: my uncle suddenly passed away on the same day I finished my, as of now, unpublished second novel. My grandparents both passed away not long after. My academic life had been unturned in the fall semester by an extremely toxic professor, who I eventually had to help report to the university. I didn’t really tell my writing community these things were happening, but I leaned into Inkitt as a support for my emotional wellbeing.  I turned to the reviews, and contests, and to the public to help ease the burn from everything else going on in my life.  This was the first time I felt the well begin to empty: not writers’ block, not a creative burnout, but a slow, easing drain on my resources. I suspect now that an author’s relationship with the public is complicated, and that at times, it can be more addictive to be popular than it is to make things.

II. Inkitt

I place some blame on what happened to my writing with my paid job in 2016 with Inkitt. I became their community manager for a period of time. An extremely long story lies behind that statement, but I will add that my writing was a tool that got used in the company’s favor during that period, and this wasn’t something I consented to. I was bullied, harassed, and made to feel very small for the period I spent with the company.

I started to write again in Europe that year: I remember penning chapters on a rainy afternoon in England, perched on the sofa of a hotel bar, and this was after a very long stint of creating nothing, but my work remained on the same novel.

Deep down, I felt like if I polished it enough, it would do better than any of the other pieces I’d thumbed through or reviewed for this godforsaken company. It was a nasty, mean-spirited line of thinking that led me to resent the very authors who had supported me all this time, not because I thought they were bad authors, but because I was so burdened by the company’s demands. I became angry that the other authors couldn’t see all the work I did- “how dare you ask things of me? How dare you write when I can’t? When they won’t let me anymore?”

It was a very blackened spot on my mind, and I have recognized this place for what it was: anger at my oppressive job (which I quit) and some unchecked grief over the previous year. It took me time to fully grieve my uncle, and even longer to fully bury Inkitt. I forgive nothing of them, and I can only hope my author community will forgive me for what I sometimes became in the wake of the company’s damage.

The writing well was never quite the same after Inkitt: it felt poisoned, or even hard to access. It’s important to note that I changed schools during that time, but… I knew something was unwell in the space of my brain.

III: The Aftermath

I speak of all that’s happened as if my creative force suddenly ground to a halt four years ago, but that’s not quite right. I’ve just written less and less as years have passed or contributed less with a passionate fervor. I do love some of my academic writing, I do make things from fiction that are great, but these pieces emerge from a sort of inner morass that takes a great deal of effort to push back. I have to fight with a work to make it happen.

As for the finished second novel? It remains finished: I have diced it up and attempted to rework its contents, but the original draft is very painful to read and colored by the things that happened around it. Last year, I surmised to scrap the whole draft and start Chimehour’s sequels fresh, with maybe one or two scenes intact. It was a hard call: one of the most agonizing things I have done in my writing, in fact. 188k of words, and only a few people will have ever read them. Some of it is to do with a principle character, whom my uncle inspired and who became- after his death, very difficult to write. Some of it is the flawed nature of draft that maybe, just maybe, was meant for me to grow from, and nothing else.   Outside of that, I suppose I’m sharing this to admit, with confidence, that I’ve been dealing with anxiety spikes and depressive episodes for about three years. This is not new: I’ve had depression and anxiety for a long, long time, but the return of these episodes caught me off guard. I had not felt so low since I was in middle school, I had not had bad panic attacks after I settled into college. But here we are. I have not decided if I need to see a therapist yet (I might), but I do know that I feel lighter for expressing these struggles and acknowledging their realness.   We’ll see what the writing well brings in the future.

[loudest-subtext-in-tv]

A Study in Fate teaser

Here’s the first 2200 words of a novel-length fanfic that I’ll finish sometime this year. It’s a WiP on an atypical schedule: At a later date I’ll release the rest of the first chapter, but then I’ll release everything else all at once.

Some authors don’t like if you hassle them to hurry up, but I may find it motivating. I’m going to attempt to get better at answering my asks/comments so feel free to ask me things about this fic, but keep in mind there’s a lot of things I won’t answer. Please be aware that no one cares if you don’t like first person perspective.

Though a big aspect of this story is about how to manage depression, it starts in a relatively dark place and weaves in and out of it. If you can’t handle unresolved distant thoughts of suicide right now, maybe wait until the entire story is posted.

Finally, I am doing okay financially right now, but two of my fandom friends are not. If you’ve ever wanted to give me money, I now have a Patreon. Anything you give me will help me help them.

Description: After the events of The Empty Hearse, Sherlock struggles to figure out who he is now that John no longer seems willing to play a prominent role in his life. As his mind runs in circles trying to parse their relationship and determine who threw John in the bonfire, his world is shattered by an enigmatic visitor: himself, bearing bad news from the future.

Series 3 time travel remix; series 4 compatible.

Tags and warnings: first person present, agonizing slow burn, explicit but romantic, depression, suicidal ideation, NOT FLUFF, self-actualization

Read on AO3 or under the cut:

Chapter One - The Curtain Rises

One can’t get far without an organizing principle. Every man needs one drive to which all others are subordinate, a touchstone that seizes him with purpose.

I had one once.

Now I have chips.

Dreadful organizing principle, chips: once you’ve got them, there’s nothing propelling you forward anymore. Have enough of them and you hardly want to move at all. God. I was in the best shape of my life, body and mind, and now I’m turning into Mycroft.

Except Mycroft has already transcended these struggles — or so he claims. Yet again, I’m lagging behind on a path I never wanted to follow. Splendid.

Any moment Mrs Hudson will come out and start chattering away about you. That will set me back the rest of the day, yet I won’t ascend the stairs. Does no part of my mind demand control of my brain stem? I’m meant to be some kind of genius: Any visionary corner of my psyche eager to make something of me? No takers?

No. Life is now nothing more but the wandering of here to there. And thoughts like that are why everyone thinks I’m a baby, so for god’s sake stop.

I am all too stopped.

Depression is a dowsing rod: shows you where to dig. So: Why do I halt here, at the bottom of the stairs? Why can’t I face the only place I’ve ever belonged?

It’s not merely that you don’t live here anymore. Not quite. That would be too easy.

Where are you wandering now, John? You got off work an hour ago. No one's called to alert me you've been kidnapped, so there's one thing I didn't miss today.

Still figuring that out, darling. Off my game. Maybe was never on it. Against my better judgment I let romance rot my mind, and you're the one who's suffered most. But I've recovered from less noble chemical weaknesses than your company. Against all odds I still draw breath. If I make myself do nothing else, I will turn this around. I'll prove you can rely on me.

Any threatening emails? You don't just attempt to incinerate a man and move on. For god's sake, give me something.

Oh. A text. Not a threat; a video from the homeless network. Must have been delayed whilst I was on the tube.

There you are, alive and unwell, and here responds my heart but it's nothing. Mere streets away from me, and nowhere near her flat. Why do you do this, John? Is your phone broken? We could just talk about this. Give me another chance and I swear I won't come on so strong. I was too presumptuous when we last spoke weeks ago. I broke your heart, I'm monstrous; you're no longer fond. I get it.

You're no longer fond, but you're in need of a hit. Which is curious, you realize. You understand how a man would get the impression... But no. I won't presume. Life is boring and I'm dangerous and bless you, you need a hit. Just come get one. I'll pretend I'm managing, I'll find a way to switch on that whole persona for you and you can do your hero worship thing. I won't act desperate.

Just show up, and I will respect your wishes.

Do anything but pensively stop on the sidewalk in front of shops you have no intention of entering. It just screams, I'm distracted! Kidnap me! It's been an age and I know you despise me, but if you keep doing this I'm going to have to conduct surprise drills again.

Maybe you're trying to get kidnapped. I wouldn't put it past you. Maybe it would be charity to send a car around for you to blithely climb into. Do you even think about how that would make Mary feel, John?

Of course, it's me you're thinking about right now. The tension in your posture, the unconscious clenching of your hand, the conflict evident on your face even from this distance: definitely me.

You know, I wasn't the only one who presumed. The papers presumed, the entire British populace presumed, even your sister presumed and surely she'd -- No matter. You've made yourself clear. Just: spare a thought for "the best thing that's ever happened" to you. I've no talent for consoling women on my best days, and I'd hate to see how I'd fare in a worse state than her.

No, I don't know that. I don't know that I love you more than she does. She's never broken your heart.

Oh. Wait, why...? For god's sake, Pilar, why would you approach him? He'll notice.

Well. Can't complain about seeing your eyes more clearly. Not good for my recovery. And there, yes, you've noticed. Paranoia in full swing, hackles raised, and a step forward. 'Can I help you?' in your usual tone that fashions a threat from etiquette.

Not good for my recovery, no. The things you do to my blood, John.

'Got a pound?'

'For someone recording me?' You scoff, narrow your eyes. 'Are you...?'

'Say, aren't you John Watson?' Oh, clever girl. Look at him, pretending he's not pleased to be recognized.

Yet nothing is ever simple with you, John.

'Yeah.' You're either too smart or too suspicious for your own good. (Freud would presume. I'm only saying.) 'Did he...?' You look directly at the camera; at me.

Come on! You assume it’s me? When roaming bands of criminals have set you aflame? Oh here we go, that spark in your eye -- you're going all in:

'Did you put her up to this?'

Oh well.

'Who? What makes you say that, sir?'

'Uh, well he does it all the time.' I don't. 'You know what? Just send it to him.'

'Not sure what you mean, sir.'

'Oh,' you laugh, 'you're not sure what I mean. Stop bloody recording me.'

And that's the end of that.

So. Guess you won't be coming over this week either. Or will you? Are you angry enough to confront me? It's not stalking when it's for your own protection -- just ask my brother, John. God knows he could use the conversation.

I’ve got to find more discreet operatives.

> Next time don't be so obvious.

When did she send this? Ten minutes ago. No, if you were going to come over, you would have arrived by now.

I suppose you’ve already said everything you have to say. But not even a text for stalking, John? I thought we had a connection.

Or we did. Before Moriarty won.

Not your fault. All mine. I underestimated him, failed to foresee the lengths to which he'd go for his insane plan. Didn't realize how many pieces he'd put on the board. Stupid.

A ping:

i thought youd like it? before you whinged you cant hardly see him

It was only supposed to be months, John. Then dozens of pulled threads later and you'd already gone and shacked up with a woman! That's what I get for being thorough.

And not even thorough enough. But if I wasn't thorough enough then neither was MI6, John. If Moriarty still had operatives in London, that's on Mycroft. And me. But definitely on Mycroft.

I don't know. Hate not knowing.

Are we really never going to talk about this? I took down an international crime syndicate for you, and you broke up with me on your blog?

No, no -- sorry. I take full responsibility.

This is ridiculous. I don't know why anyone comes to me to solve their problems. I can't even make it up the stairs.

Ah.

That's it, isn't it? I don’t live up there anymore, either.

Yes. Everyone says you can find Sherlock Holmes just up those stairs, back from the dead and cleverer than ever! Like most things everyone says, it’s not true. I search for him in these rooms daily, and all the evidence points to this: Sherlock Holmes was a character created by John Watson. An exciting story. A fairy tale. (Dare I say a fantasy?)

People will believe anything you tell them, John, and they did. You were so sure I was a hero that even I came to believe it in the end. Now they only keep believing it because I lied. I was never steps ahead, never as infallible as you made me out to be -- and now that you've quit writing me I'll never be anyone at all.

But I'm doing it again. Getting histrionic. I'm not the first nobody to have his heart broken. They all get on with life.

Well: usually. Technically speaking, the most invested ones turn to murder or suicide. On the upside, murder is still in the cards: Assuming I can pull it together long enough to hunt down the appropriate parties, they are murderers and it would be doing the world a favor to murder them right back. In the course of any such investigation there will tend to arise situations in which I would have no choice but to murder them -- or, fortune willing, sacrifice myself so that you may live. Or both! Now that would be a power play: cleanse the board of evil, preserve the king. The ideal way to die may yet fall into my lap.

It's nice to have things to look forward to.

But say it doesn't pan out. Given my recent track record it would be foolish to place undue faith in my forecasting abilities, and after all, I don't know for certain this has anything to do with Moriarty's network. He pulled so many rugs out from under me I'm always half expecting yet another rug. I may grow as paranoid as you, John, with him skulking about in my head. For all I know everyone involved was in Moran's network, and I'm chasing after people who are already in custody. Maybe there's no grand end, no power plays, no relief.

That leaves suicide.

I'm not saying I will, John. I refuse to break your heart again. And it would be no way to honor the lengths to which you've gone to preserve my life. They're mere thoughts. They come and go -- always have, and I always haven't. I'm not going to do it, and if I am, I can always do it later.

But no appealing alternative has revealed itself. Only the obvious path for the invested: live like everyone else, and finally sever myself from aspiring to anything meaningful or exciting. Growing up, they call it.

Freud called it repression, so let's hold off on drastic measures. I made this life work before and I can make it work again.

Of course, that was easy for Freud to say: Being invested in life isn't an exercise in masochism when you have a lifelong companion. Not to be maudlin, John, but I wasn't making it work until you came along. Not truly. You were the gear that made it all click. I couldn't become Sherlock Holmes until you facilitated it.

It felt like the strength you granted me persisted during our years apart, but it's no surprise I drifted off course the moment you weren't at my side. That's not superstitious, John, that’s just a cold fact. You would have caught the little things I didn't. You would have kept my ego in check.

But what's done is done. I'll muster some strength for you. Reinvent myself again. Reorder my mind, keep myself off the needle and the pavement until I tie up these loose ends. Then... who knows.

Maybe someone else will come along.

Well. Feels good to laugh.

I’ve got to get on with it. Life may be a flight of uncarpeted stairs, but I'm sick of being down here.

'Going out, dear? John didn't call, did he?'

Will I always be this damned slow?

I sigh loudly, not that it will make any difference. 'No, and no.' You scowl like you do when I talk about him. 'Just getting in.'

You frown. 'But we were just talking.'

My heart leaps. 'You and John?'

'No, silly.' My heart falls. You tilt your head; smile. 'You and me.'

'You were talking. I was out.'

You shake your head and laugh, a cheery, infuriating tinkle. 'You had quite a lot to--'

'Mrs Hudson.' For god's sake, do not go senile on me. Not one more straw.

'Is it drugs, dear?' Terrible, hushed pity. Everyone always leaps straight to drugs! 'Oh don't get angry, I know all the signs! The nerve of him, putting you in this state. I'd say a few things to him, if only he'd come around once in a--'

Anything has got to be better than this.

'Project much?' The stairs are fine two at a time.

'I need those for my hip!’

'Adjust your dose! You're clearly...’ What?

What in the world?

'That would explain so much,' he says, and the room tilts.

Through the door. There I am. There he is.

Sherlock Holmes.

End notes:

In The Lying Detective, Sherlock tells Faith that chips are “the only perk” of being suicidal. In The Empty Hearse, he was eating chips when Mary told him John had been kidnapped.

John’s most recent blog entry before this story takes place is The Empty Hearse. It’s a mindfuck minefield for poor Sherlock, but we’ll get into that more soon. For now, know it contains this doozy: “Oh, and in other news, I’ve got engaged. But, it’s not something I’m really going to talk about much here. I want to keep some things private. I will say, though, she’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me. Sorry, Sherlock :)”

I borrowed the name Pilar from Sherlock Holmes and the Baker Street Irregulars: The Fall of the Amazing Zalindas, a novel by Tracy Mack and Michael Citrin. I’ve never read it, mind, it just seems like it wouldn’t be the sort of thing Sherlock would assign to Wiggins, and Wiggins would never be so sloppy.

Sherlock is obsessed with Freud. One Freud reference in The Abominable Bride, which was constructed entirely from Sherlock’s drugged out brain, came from Mycroft, who asked John if he was aware of theories of paranoia. Freud believed paranoid people were closeted homosexuals, heavily insinuating that Sherlock believes John is a closeted homosexual. Freud meta to come later; he’s very important.

Freud was with his wife for 57 years.

“Life is a flight of uncarpeted stairs” is from the poem “Spring” by the early 20th century queer poet Edna St. Vincent Millay. She ended up dying of a heart attack that made her fall down the stairs, which is itself poetic. Though she was a woman, I think it’s realistic Sherlock would know about her: the Casebook notes that Sherlock reads the agony aunt columns in women’s magazines because they contain all of life and are pertinent to his line of work, and in the same spirit I’ve made him familiar with all old famous love letters, for which she’s renowned. We also know Sherlock is familiar with Shakespeare and moved enough to remember entire soliloquies, so there’s no way Sherlock could read “Spring” and not retain some of it — especially as John and Mary had been aiming for a spring wedding, and the poem references April, which is just wrapping up as the fic begins.

[the-girl-who-loves-monsters]

1-59

1.Selfie

2.What would I name my future kids? Morgan, Aidan, Conor

3.Do I miss anyone? I miss a few people. Old friends I miss my dad.

4. What am I looking forward to? My little nerd heart is looking forward to Captain Marvel😸

5. Is there anyone who can always make you smile? There are a couple people who can, but on my worst days my son can make me smile with a joke or his kindness to me and others.

6. Is it hard for you to get over someone? It depends on the situation, type of relationship, and how it ended.

7. What was your life like last year? Confusion, heartache, loss, pain, and finally clarity.

8. Have you ever cried because you were so annoyed? Yes a few times lol.

9. Who did I last see in person? My mum!

10. Are you good at hiding your feelings? I can be very good at hiding my feelings, until I reach that breaking point.

11. Are you listening to music right now? No, Child's Play and Chucky is screaming obscenities.

12. What is something you want right now? My head and throat to stop hurting from being so sick.

13. How do you feel right now? Content for the most part.

14. When was the last time someone of the opposite sex hugged you? Today, my son.

15. Personality description. Shy and quiet til I'm comfortable, then ridiculous and sarcastic.

16.Have you ever wanted to tell somebody something and didn't? Yes frequently.

17. Opinion on insecurities? they suck

18. Do you miss how things were a year ago? Not at all. On top of everything else, I was highly unwell mentally. Things are changing for the best now.

19. Been to New York? No

20. What is my favourite song at the moment? Pet Semetary Ramones

21. Age and Birthday? 33 and January

22. Description of Crush? Small, pink, adorable, beady black eyes. Sucks up his enimes.

23.Fears? Loosing myself to depression again.

24.Height? 5'5

25. Role Model? My mum. Don't always agree, but she has inspired me.

26.Idols? Bettie Page, Cassandra Peterson, Guillermo del Toro list goes on.

27. Things I hate? Stupidity, racism, douchebags who can't just respect others and mind their own business. Decaf coffee

28. I'll love you if...are a good honest and respectful person.

29. Favourite films? Friday the 13th, Nightmare on Elm Street, Shadow of a Doubt, Rope, The Bad Seed, Evil Dead, What We Do in the Shadows.

30. Favourite tv shows? Doctor Who, The Office, Man Down, Farscape, Absolutely Fabulous, Jessica Jones, Chewing Gum, The Young Ones and tons more.

31. 3 random facts. When I can I love to go on runs at night, it's the perfect time. I have read Mists of Avalon 8 times I adore it. I used to be scared of the dark, now I love it.

32. Are your friends mainly guys or girls? I have more girls than guys as friends.

33. Something I want to learn? How to not let my anxiety overtake my thoughts.

34. Most embarrassing moment? Rather not say😊

35. Favourite subject? Psychology

36. 3 dreams I want to fulfill? Finish college. Go to Norway. Find peace and balance in my life.

37. Favourite actress? Cate Blanchett😍

38. Favourite comedians George Carlin, Robin Williams, Eddie Izard, Roy Wood Jr. Sarah Silverman, Illiza Shlesinger Patton Oswald and tons more.

39. Favourite sports? Hockey and soccer. Used to watch wrestling with my dad all way back as a kid, but haven't in awhile since he had been sick and then passed.

40. Favourite Memory? It would be every horror movie my mom took me to go see or we would watch at home. Bonded over those.

41. Relationship status? Content

42. Favourite books? Mists of Avalon, The Stand, Frankenstein, list goes on. On top of all the comics and graphic novels Watchmen, Loki, and The Dark Kight and Xmen vs. The Avengers just to name a few.

43. Favourite Song Ever? Paranoid Black Sabbath

44. Age you get mistsken for? 28

45. How you found out about your idol? My parents usually showing me things they liked.

46. What my last text message says? "Good night. Talk to you tomorrow after my appointnent." To my bestie she always checking up on me😊

47. Turn ons? Honesty, respect, a love for nerd things, funny personality, romantic and caring.

48. Turn offs? Dishonesty, disrespect number of things.

49. Where I want to be right now? I don't really want to say, kinda personal. 2nd choice would be in a cabin in the mountains chilling outside waiting for the sun to come up.

50. Favourite pic of my Idol (Gif is better)

51. Starsign? Capricorn

52. Something I'm talented at? Writing

53. 5 things that make me happy? Music, books, comedy, my son, and going on a run or hike.

54. Something worrying me at the moment? My anxiety has me worry over everything, but at this point for once nothing. Things are for once going slightly in my favor and I'm as content as I can ask.

55. Tumblr Friends? So many wonderful people on here to remember all the tags but @salems-mystical-misfit @shaylalovebug @mywayforward18 @devilmingy @aciddayydreamss @cinnamonbritches @song-of-the-reaper @squish-monsterr @e-a-t-m-y-d-e-a-d-c-o-c-k @my-heart-fiction-superstition @order-of-kinky-beeings @thesolitarysubmissive @richard-is-bored and so many more awesome people old and brand new who have been so lovely💕🌸🌸

56. Favourite foods? Pasta, pizza, spinach salads, and spinach and rice.

57. Favourite animals? Foxes, wolves, penguins, turtles, bats, octopus, elephants, meercats,dogs and cats.

58. Description of my best friend. 5'7 average body type with a booty to be proud of, long brown hair and a sweet face.

59. Why I joined Tumblr? Couple old friends were on it and I checked it out and enjoyed what I saw. Made a few cool friends and enjoyed it better than Facebook.

Thank you 😊

[padawanlost]

Remember that part in the ROTS novel where Palpy tells Anakin about Padme secretly conspiring with other senators and Anakin’s inner voice laments, “oh Padme, just how much trouble are you in”? Did Anakin honestly think that Padme was in danger of being accused of treason? And in extension, that he was saving her from such accusations by siding with Palps? Idk, I always get the distinct feeling that Palps would’ve more heavy-handed in dealing with her if Anakin had chosen differently. Thoughts?

“There are, now, only two kinds of Senators in our government, Anakin.Those whose names are on this so-called petition,” Palpatine said, “and thosewhom the Jedi are about to arrest.” Anakin could only stare. He couldn’t argue. He couldn’t even makehimself disbelieve. He had only onethought. Padmé …? How much trouble was she in? “Didn’t I warn you, Anakin?Didn’t I tell you what Obi-Wan was up to? Why do you think he was meeting withthe leaders of this … delegation … behind your back?”“But—but, sir, please, surely, all they asked for is an end to the war. It’swhat the Jedi want, too. I mean, it’s what we all want, isn’t it? Isn’t it?”“Perhaps. Though how that end comes about may be the single most importantthing about the war. More important, even, than who wins.” Oh, Padmé, Anakin moaned inside his head. Padmé, what have you gottenyourself into? “Their … sincerity … may be much to beadmired,” Palpatine said. “Or it would be, were it not that there was much moreto that meeting than met the eye.” Anakin frowned. “What do you mean?”“Their … petition … was nothing of the sort. It was, infact, a not-so-veiled threat.”Palpatine sighed regretfully. “It was a show of force, Anakin. A demonstrationof the political power the Jedi will be able to muster in support of theirrebellion.” Anakin blinked. “But—but surely—” he stammered, roundingPalpatine’s desk, “surely SenatorAmidala, at least, can be trusted …” “I understand how badly you needto believe that,” the Chancellor said. “But Senator Amidala is hidingsomething. Surely you sensed it.” “Ifshe is—” Anakin swayed; the floor seemed to be tilting under his feet like thedeck of Invisible Hand. “Even if she is,” he said, his voice flat, overcontrolled,“it doesn’t mean that what she is hiding is treason.” Palpatine’s browsdrew together. “I’m surprised your Jedi insights are not more sensitive to suchthings.” “I simply don’t sense betrayalin Senator Amidala,” Anakin insisted. [Matthew Stover. Revenge of the Sith]

That’s agood question. At this time Anakin was already emotionally compromised. He was exhausted (he hadn’t slept in days) an paranoid. An easy target for Palpatine’smanipulations. Anakin had faith in Padme, unfortunately Palpatine took advantage ofAnakin’s trust and deteriorating mental health and weaseled his way in.

“Shecouldn’t—” Anakin pressed a hand to his forehead; his dizziness was gettingworse. When had he last eaten? He couldn’t remember. It might have been beforethe last time he’d slept. “She could never …” “Of course she could,” Palpatine said. “Thatis the nature of politics, my boy. Don’t take it too personally. It doesn’tmean the two of you can’t be happy together.” […] “But if she’s going to betrayus—” “That, my boy,” Palpatine said, “isentirely up to you.” The fog inside Anakin’s head seemed to solidify into along, dark tunnel. The point of light at the end was Palpatine’s face. “Idon’t—I don’t understand …” “Oh yes, that’s very clear.” The Chancellor’svoice seemed to be coming from very far away. “Please sit, my boy. You’relooking rather unwell. May I offer you something to drink?” “I—no. No, I’m allright.” Anakin sank gratefully into adangerously comfortable chair. “I’m just—a little tired, that’s all.” “Notsleeping well?” “No.” Anakin offered an exhausted chuckle. “I haven’t beensleeping well for a few years, now.” [Matthew Stover. Revenge of the Sith]

Palpatine went on trying toconvince Anakin HE was the right choice, the one who was offering the realoptions.

“Do youunderstand, now? I will give you anything you want.” The concept left [Anakin]dizzy. “What if I wanted—what if I wentalong with Padmé and her friends? What if I want the war to end?” “Wouldtomorrow be too soon?”

And after finally reveling his true intentions to Anakin, he finishes with this:

“Butwhat will happen when you kill me? What will happen to the Republic?” Histone was gently reasonable. “What willhappen to Padmé?” “Padmé …” Her name was a gasp of anguish. “When I die,” Palpatine said with the airof a man reminding a child of something he ought to already know, “my knowledgedies with me.”

I thinkPalpatine uses Anakin’s worry over Padmé’s political to hook Anakin into paying attention, to make himself seem like the best option available. And thatdefinitely adds to Anakin’s burdens. Though his main concern was savingher life, now he had to worry about saving her from a political conspiracy aswell. This is made clear after he becomes Vader and goes say goodbye to herbefore leaving to Mustafar:

“How canall of them be traitors—?” “They’re not the only ones. There were Senators in this as well.” Now, finally, she looked at him,and fear shone from her eyes. He smiled. “Don’t worry. I won’t let anythinghappen to you.” “To me?” “You need to distance yourself fromyour … friends … in the Senate, Padmé. It’s very importantto avoid even the appearance of disloyalty.” “Anakin—you sound like you’rethreatening me …” “This is a dangerous time,” he said. “We are all judgedby the company we keep.” “But—I’veopposed the war, I opposed Palpatine’s emergency powers—I publicly called him athreat to democracy!” “That’s all behind us now.” “What is? What I’ve done? Ordemocracy?” “Padmé—” Her chin came up, and her eyes hardened. “Am I undersuspicion?” “Palpatine and I have discussed you already. You’re in the clear,so long as you avoid … inappropriate associations.” “How am I in theclear?” “Because you’re with me. Because I say you are.” [Matthew Stover.Revenge of the Sith]

So, yeah,the accusations against Padmé definitely played a role in Anakin’s decision toside with Palpatine.

As far asPadmé’s fate goes, I don’t think it made much difference what Anakin chose.Palpatine was going to kill her either way. There’s no way he allows her tolive, no matter what Anakin does. The only way Padmé survives is if Palpatinedies or if she completely disappears. She is too much of a threat to his powerover Vader and the galaxy for him to allow her to be part of his Empire(something she would never accept in the first place). Also, he didn’t need tobe more heavy handed because Anakin was already terrified she was going die. Thetreason charges were just the icing on the cake.  If Anakin had said no, Palpatine would try tokill them both.

Beings believe what you tell them. They nevercheck, they never ask, they never think. Tell them the state is menaced by quadrillionsof battle droids, and they will not count. Tell them you can save them, andthey will never ask—from what, from whom? Just say tyranny, oppression, vaguebogeymen that require no analysis. Never specify. Then they look the other waywhen reality is right in front of them.It’s a conjuring trick. The key is distraction, getting them to watch yourother hand. Only single-minded beings don’t join in the shared illusion, andkeep watching you too closely. Single-minded beings are dangerous. And theyeither work for me, or they don’t work at all. [Karen Traviss. Order 66]

[twopedalpushers]

Travel Update #4

Medellín to Ecuador

After a total of one month pedalling and one month sight seeing, we have finished the Colombian chapter of our trip and are now in Ecuador!

When I think about the second half of our journey through Colombia after leaving Medellín, it feels far less eventful than the first half of the trip. After 3 months in total on the bike by this point, we were now comfortable negotiating our way through Colombia and managed to avoid any silly mishaps.

After a few days in Medellín the overwhelming amount of pollution trapped in the valley started getting to me so I felt relieved to pedal onwards into the hilly, peaceful coffee region of Salento. Salento is near the Cocora Valley - home to the world’s largest palm trees! The whole region is kind of other-worldly and feels like it’s been ripped straight out of a Dr. Seuss novel.

We ended up having a peaceful Christmas here before cycling on to the loudest, brightest and most vibrant city in Colombia (in my opinion): Cali.

Cali is known as the ‘salsa capital of the world.’ I had a blasé attitude about this beforehand but I quickly changed my mind after a few days in the city. Salsa is life in Cali. It blasts out of every bar and restaurant. From 7pm onwards the streets come alive - everyone is out, even small children who stay up until the early hours of the morning, playing in the park while their parents sit down with a beer. Absolutely everyone knows how to salsa and clubs are bursting with dancing couples. We took a salsa class to feel like we fitted in but after an hour we realised that we were not naturally gifted at salsa. We salsa’d (clumsily) in the bars anyway and made up for our obvious lack of skill with passion.

We also happened to arrive when the ‘Feria de Cali’ was taking place - a 5 day festival from Boxing Day to New Year’s Eve where day after day, residents party and dance salsa on the streets to incredible live brass bands. It’s safe to say that Cali was a pretty entertaining place to spend New Year’s Eve.

Recently we have started using an app called ‘Warm Showers.’ It’s similar to couch surfing except that it’s only used by cycle-tourers looking to be hosted in the homes other bike enthusiasts. We arranged to stay with a lady called Laura in her house in Popayán - 140km south of Cali. In text messages beforehand she let us know that we would be ‘camping on her balcony’ as she didn’t have a spare room. Having done plenty of camping on the trip so far, we were happy with this offer and glad to have a night of free accommodation in the city. However, once we got there we discovered that her ‘balcony’ was her concrete attic space that’s main function was as a toilet for her two dogs. Being English and too polite to tell her that the space was unsuitable for human habitation, we set up our tent and tried to ignore the overpowering smell of years worth of dog urine. Almost a month later, the ground sheet of our tent still smells of the terrible aromas of that fateful night.

The one upside of staying with Laura was that she let us store our bikes in her house for a few days while we visited Max’s friends Dad, Fernando in San Agustin. The bad track and warnings of potential guerrilla activity in the region put us off cycling there so we took a bus. The track was so bad that it took 6 hours for the bus to travel 150km!

Staying with Fernando in the impressive wooden house that he built himself was incredibly peaceful and a good opportunity to rest and recuperate. We went on walks and ate fresh fruit and vegetables from his garden.

The road onwards from Popayán towards the border was where the real hard work started. We were now entering the Andes and cycled up to high altitudes proved to be quite difficult. Just as we would climb to 3000m altitude, the road would drop off and we would descend all the way back down to around 1000m. I understand that’s how mountains work but after half an hour of fun whizzing downhill it became demoralising to have to then climb all the way back up. The views of the valley below were spectacular which made all uphill climbing worthwhile. We took an alternate, quieter route through the mountains which had very little traffic, enabling us to stop and admire the green Colombian section of the Andes. Climbing a few thousand metres of elevation day upon day was exhausting but I could feel my body getting stronger. At the start of our trip in Costa Rica we would only travel 50km per day on a relatively flat road. Now we were managing 80-90km through mountain ranges, carrying more food and luggage than before. I was even starting to get used to getting out of bed when our alarm goes off at 5am.

When we reached the border I felt really proud. Crossing Colombia by bike had been the most challenging thing that I had ever done, both physically and mentally. Despite the weather, feeling tired or unwell we got up each day and got back on the bike.

After two months in Colombia, I was excited to see what Ecuador had to offer. During our last few weeks cycling we have seen lots of groups of Venezuelans on the walking with all of their belongings towards Ecuador to try and find work. It was the first time that I have encountered people in such a state of desperation and made me realise how lucky I am to have a home to go back to. Despite their situation, most had a positive outlook and asked us about our trip and where we were heading, before wishing us “buen viaje” - a pleasant journey on the road ahead.

Ecuador so far has been a whirlwind and we are now in Quito - the second highest capital city in the world! I will write about our journey through Ecuador all in one go in the next update.

Now that the Colombian chapter of our trip is over, I thought I would write a list of all the interesting things that I noticed about the country and its people during our two month journey. Its lifted straight from my journal so please excuse how colloquial it is. Here you go:

Mullets seem to be the most popular hairstyle for young men.

Colombia has an amazing variety of fruit I’ve never heard of before- Lulo, Guanabana, Maracuya (to name a few!)

A large amount of adults have braces. So many that it’s noticeable. Is dental care cheap?

Motorola smartphones are popular in Colombia. I didn’t know Motorola even made smartphones...

Lots of women work in construction. I say lots but I mean compared to the amount of women working in construction in the UK

The best fresh juices and free limonada with every meal! Limonada is a drink made of water and panela (refined sugar cane.) Colombians knock this back 24/7. I’m going to miss it.

Colombians have an overwhelming amount of passion for cycling. It’s admirable.

Little Colombian girls all have incredibly elaborate hairstyles consisting of braids, cornrows, coloured hairbands, glitter and the occasional bow.

Sweet things (dulces) are king in Colombia. There is a Panadería (bakery) roughly every couple of hundred metres. My favourite Colombian pastries are Chicharrons (puff pastry with guava jelly) or Pan de Bananos with apricot jam.

As usual, here is the link to track our progress http://share.garmin.com/DMB7R

Remember to hit “view all” and zoom out to see the whole journey. You will find us in Ecuador!

[never-a-tale-of-more-poe]

CHAPTER 7: In with the New

tw: sexual content, anger

Note: Guys, if you like the surprise in this chapter and would like more of it, please let me know and I will be happy to include more in future chapters. I hope you guys like this!

Also, as I mentioned before, since I decided to add this in I had to omit some of the things I had previously planned to include in this chapter. If something you thought would be in this chapter is now absent, please message me with what and I will be sure to include it. (i.e., any requests/questions I didn’t answer, etc.

I really appreciate each and every one of you, and this is was sort of my way of thanking you guys for being so kind and supportive to and of me.

Enjoy!

P.S. The surprise included in this chapter will not be in the chapters posted on FF.net/Ao3. 

 There were one thousand, six hundred, and forty-eight little air holes in Spencer’s cell. She’d counted every single one. It was the only thing that helped keep her mind off of everything that was going on. Spencer wasn’t even sure what was going on.

Though she did know this: she was locked underground, in a tiny cell no bigger than the average bedroom, her former high school teacher occupied the cell across from her, and her twin was running around Rosewood as her, probably setting mailboxes on fire or something.

Spencer had been positive that her friends would notice – that there would be something that didn’t seem quite right – but it seemed less likely as more time passed. Alex was her identical twin – everything about their physical appearance was identical. It was such a mind-fuck that Spencer half-expected to be ambushed with cameras and told it was a not-so-hilarious joke. But that was even less likely than her friends noticing that the Spencer they were with wasn’t actually Spencer.

And Toby helping Alex was the icing on the putrid cake she’d been force-fed. He had explained to Spencer that he knew about Alex a long time ago, but had vowed never to say anything to anyone. He wouldn’t reveal why he was helping Alex, or what he was getting in return, but apparently Toby and Wren were pretty good friends. What was more was that Toby had promised Spencer that he wouldn’t hurt her. And he hadn’t.

Ezra, though, was a different story. All Toby would say about Ezra was that Alex had “special plans” for him. He did not elaborate on what those plans were and when Ezra had cursed at him, Toby had turned off the lights to his cell and shut the first set of doors. Ezra had stayed in his silent, dark cell for over an hour, while Toby had (presumably) gone upstairs.

When Toby had finally opened the steel doors and turned on the light, Ezra was on his bed, simply staring at the wall. From that point on, Spencer and Ezra barely saw Toby except when he brought them food and water.

By the time they had eaten their second meal, Spencer really had to use the bathroom, but she was too scared to ask Toby to let her out. Instead she looked Toby dead in the eye and asked for a bucket. Not only did Toby comply, albeit reluctantly, but he brought her toilet paper and a small pack of sanitizing wipes.

When Ezra had asked for his own bucket, Toby had initially refused, but Spencer managed to talk him into it. Ezra was an asshole, but he shouldn’t have to use the bathroom in a bucket. He was still human, though in the lowest meaning of the word.

Later that night, when Alex still hadn’t returned, Toby told her to get some sleep; Alex would be back tomorrow. Needless to say Spencer didn’t sleep well. She tossed and turned, mumbling in her sleep. She only knew it was morning when Toby came down with toast, jelly and little milk cartons.

The only thing she could do was wait. Alex had to come back soon, right?

“Oh, my God,” Alison groaned.

“What?” Emily glanced up from the book she was reading.

“These kids are killing me,” Alison rubbed her eyes and sat back in the armchair she’d occupied for the past hour.

“Oh, don’t be so dramatic.” Emily said, rolling her eyes. “Their essays can’t be that bad.” She was stretched out comfortably on the couch, reading Rubyfruit Jungle.

“Most of them are pretty well-written, but there are a few handfuls that are just…yikes.” Alison frowned, chewing on the end of her pen. “I can guarantee you half of these kids didn’t read the book and just used Wikipedia.”

“Ali, you used to do that,” Emily giggled. “Remember when we had to read Animal Farm in eighth-grade and you watched the movie instead, and wrote your report based off the movie?”

Alison made a face. “God, I hated that book. It was so boring.”

“So your kids probably felt the same way about what they read,” Emily pointed out. “What did they have to read, anyway?”

“Guess.” Alison smirked.

“I don’t want to guess,” Emily sighed. “Just tell me.”

“Just guess!” Alison said. “Come on.”

“Fine,” Emily grumbled. “Uh… The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn?”

“Nope,” Alison answered.

“The Scarlett Letter?” Emily guessed.

“Nah. Try again, babe,” Alison said.

“Crime and Punishment?”

“No.”

“Oh, come on, Ali!” Emily sighed, running a hand through her hair. “I give up. Just tell me.”

“The Crucible,” Alison said.

“Ooh, that’s a good one!” Emily nodded.

“Yeah,” Alison agreed. “And it’s not even a lengthy novel, so I don’t see why it was so difficult to read.”

Emily giggled.

“What?” Alison’s eyes narrowed.

“You sound like a stuffy old teacher,” Emily teased.

Alison picked up a pillow and threw it at her. “Oh, go back to reading your own book! I have to finish grading these papers.”

Emily stuck out her tongue, but turned back to her novel anyway. She had only been reading for about ten minutes when Alison gasped.

“That little brat!”

“What now?” Emily didn’t look up from her book this time.

“Addison,” Alison spat through her teeth.

“What’d she do, forget to cite her sources or something?” Emily joked.

“No,” Alison seethed.

Emily set her book down. Alison sounded pissed, and something told her it wasn’t because of half-assed schoolwork. She got up from her spot on the couch and walked over. “What? What is it?”

Alison thrust Addison’s paper at Emily. She was so mad her hands were starting to shake.

Emily quickly scanned the paper in front of her. Her mouth fell open and she absentmindedly perched on the arm of the couch, her arm reflexively going around Alison’s shoulders.

“Ali…” Emily didn’t really know what else to say. “What are you going to do?”

“I am going to destroy her. If she thinks she can get away with –”

But she was cutoff mid-rant by her phone’s text alert tone that sounded like an old-fashioned doorbell. She swiped her phone off the coffee table and opened the message. Her phone slipped from her hands and she scrambled to pick it up.

“WHAT THE FUCK, JASON?” Alison shouted.

“What? Are the girls hurt?!” Emily asked, alarmed.

“Look!” Alison groaned. She shoved her phone in Emily’s face. “I will kill him.”

Emily set Addison’s paper aside and glanced down at Alison’s phone. On it was of Lily and Grace in matching mint-green bonnets and new onesies.

I MUSTACHE ASK YOU A QUESTION, read one And

BUT I SHALL SHAVE IT FOR LATER, the other Of course a couple of silly onesies weren’t what made the two women so upset. What made them upset were the tiny, gold Eiffel Tower earrings in one of their daughter’s ears, and the silver snow globes in the other.

Hanna fully intended on shopping. She needed to spoil herself after her breakup with Caleb, and the worst hangover of her life that subsequently followed earlier this morning.

She had noticed a pair of Marc Jacobs heels on sale that were to die for, and had every intention of purchasing them. But it was kind of hard to focus on shoes when she had her back against the wall of a stuffy dressing room with Mona’s fingers deep inside her.

It was like something out of a goddamn Lifetime movie. The Hastings’ house was impeccably clean. The carpet looked freshly shampooed, the kitchen floor was freshly waxed, and even the damn drapes looked spotless. There was a kettle of tea on the stove, a plate of fresh-baked macaroons on the island table, and the air smelled heavenly; like fresh laundry and lavender. Peter was dressed in dark blue jeans and a plan blue T-shirt, while Veronica looked more sophisticated in black dress pants and a black blazer. It was almost eerie how put-together everything was.

Alex followed Spencer’s parents into the living room and took a seat on the couch.

“What did you want to talk about? Is everything going well at the firm?” Veronica asked, concerned, as she settled down in an armchair across from her, while Peter sat in the other chair. “Is it Mary?” Peter’s voice was taut and sharp, almost unnerving. “Yes, the firm is fine. No, it isn’t about Mary,” Alex answered, with a roll of her eyes. “I want to talk about…well, about us.” “Us?” Peter and Veronica echoed in unison. Alex paused. She wanted to ask why they never knew about her. How could that be possible? Would they have kept her, had they known? But she couldn’t. Not yet, anyway. “Why did you keep this a secret from me for so long?” Alex finally asked. “Were you….ashamed?” “No!” Veronica gasped. “We could never be ashamed of you, sweetheart. It was very complicated. Mary –”

“ – Is very unwell,” Peter cut in. “She’s sick, Spencer. We thought it would be best if you didn’t know.” “I know I am not your birth mother, honey, but I am still your mother.” Veronica sounded like she was going to start crying. Alex frowned. “Don’t cry,” she whispered. “I….” She swallowed. Suddenly she wasn’t sure what to say. What could she say without blowing everything?

“I’m going to go up to my room,” Alex said slowly, rising to her feet. “ “I’m staying with Aria for a few days,” she added, as she ascended up the stairs to Spencer’s room. “In light of…well, you know. She needs me.” “Alright,” Veronica said. “Send our regards,” Peter added. “Poor girl…” “Yeah,” Alex murmured. She hurried up the stairs, too afraid of what she would say if she stayed a moment longer. Inside her sister’s room, Alex sort of…felt at home. It was a comfortable feeling, even though the room wasn’t hers. It certainly not how she’d decorate anyway. 

Spencer had trophies lined against various shelves on the bookshelf against the far wall. A collection of awards and ribbons for “first-place” this and first-place that lined the walls of her room and stretched all the way around, from one end of the doorframe to the other. Alex walked through Spencer’s room, into her closet and pulled out a large suitcase. She went through the closest and through Spencer’s dressers, haphazardly throwing clothes into it. Then she went into Spencer’s bathroom and grabbed her toothbrush, toothpaste, body wash and other bathroom necessities. She stuffed Spencer’s pillows into her room, along with the comforter. As she turned to walk away from the bed, she caught of a frame photo on Spencer’s bedside table. She set down the suitcase and picked up the photo frame. Nestled inside was a picture of Aria and Spencer. Their arms were around each other’s necks, their heads thrown back in laughter. Aria’s smile was so big it reached her ears. It made Alex’s stomach churn uncomfortably, and she didn’t even realize she’d thrown the frame until it shattered against the wall opposite the bed. The sound was loud, and Alex tensed, waiting for Peter and Veronica to come running. But nothing happened. Alex exhaled loudly. She shut her eyes and rubbed her temples, much like the way Spencer herself did.

“Goddammit!” Alex grumbled. She snatched up Spencer’s suitcase and pulled on the handle. She shut off the light and exited Spencer’s room, without bothering to clean up the glass from the now-broken frame. When she made her way back downstairs, Veronica was gone, but Peter – her father – was reading a newspaper. For some reason the sight made Alex smile. Who the hell still read newspapers? Alex cleared her throat. “D-Dad?” Peter glanced up over the top of his newspaper. “Are you alright?” He set his paper down and motioned Spencer over. “You look pale. Maybe you should stay home.” Alex shook her head. “I’m fine,” she said, her voice cracking. “I just…” She stepped forward and wrapped her arms around Peter, who hugged her back. Alex was so overwhelmed she almost cried. It had taken twenty-three years, but she was finally in her father’s arms. Despite what he had done, he was her father. He smelled like cologne and cigars. It was so typical and cliché that Alex laughed. “What’s so funny?” Peter pulled back. “N-nothing,” Alex swallowed. “It’s just…it’s good to see you.” “It’s great to see you, too, honey,” Peter hugged Spencer again and ruffled her hair. “Come home for lunch tomorrow. Bring Aria. We’ll make an afternoon out of it.” “Really?” Alex brightened. “Yeah, why not?” Peter smiled. Alex hugged her father once more and left. As soon as she got in her car, pulled out of the driveway and turned the corner she burst into tears. 

So…that was what it was like. That’s what it felt like to get a real hug from her father. It was a feeling Alex was sure she would never tire of.

When Alex arrived back at the bunker, Toby was yelling at Ezra. Again. She had walked in to hear the end of another rant of his, but didn’t care enough to ask about it. She pulled Toby aside and they spoke in hushed whispers, while glancing at their hostages every few seconds. Alex pressed a sealed envelope into Toby’s awaiting hands and bid him goodbye, and he shot out of there like a bat out of hell. Alex punched in the code and entered Spencer’s cell. “Hey sis,” Alex grinned. “Did ya miss me?” She gestured to the suitcase. “I’ve brought you a change of clothes. Reckon you don’t wanna be in that for another day.”

“Thank you,” Spencer whispered, oddly touched by the sweet gesture. “That was really sweet of you.” “I’ve brought ya a pillow and bathroom stuff,” Alex sat down in her chair next to Spencer’s cot. “Thought I’d make ya a bit more comfortable.” “Did you bring me anything?” Ezra asked from his own cell. “No,” Alex scoffed. “You brought Spencer clothes and everything else she might need, but you couldn’t be bothered to at least get me a fresh change of clothes?” Ezra stared at Alex in disbelief. “Are you really that much of a bi ––” “Ezra!” Spencer snapped. “God, I’m sick and tired of your constant whining. You’re acting like a three-year-old.” “Oi, Spence. Now don’t go ‘round insulting three-year-olds like that,” Alex said. Spencer’s lips twitched up into a smirk. “I am NOT acting like a child!” Ezra shouted, nearly pouting. “Alex, this is ridiculous. Stop this right now. Let us out and I will consider not pressing charges against you for aggravated kidnapping.” Alex set the suitcase down and smiled. It was a smile that made Spencer nervous and uneasy. Not for Ezra’s sake, but for Alex’s. Even though she and her sister were tall, she didn’t know how much Alex weighed. Ezra had a good one hundred pounds or so on the both of them. “You know what?” Ezra glared at Alex’s back. “I’m not surprised you were given up what was it, twice? If I were your father, I’d give you up, too!”

Both girls gasped and Alex whipped around and started toward Ezra’s cell. "YOU SON OF A —” “Al,” Spencer reached out and tugged Alex back by her wrist. “Leave it. He’s not worth it.” Alex turned to Spencer fast she was surprised she didn’t pop a muscle. “Did…did you just call me ‘Al’?” she asked. Spencer shrugged. “It’s a nickname. My friends call me Spence, as have you, so —” “I like it,” Alex said, shooting her sister a small grin. For the first time it was a warm, genuine smile. A smile, in which, Spencer saw no deceit or malicious intent. So she smiled back. “I thought you might.” Alex glared at Ezra, flipped him the middle finger and sat down next to Spencer on her bed. She started to say something, but stopped and glanced around. “Wait…” Alex said slowly. “What?” Spencer asked. “Toby didn't…that son of a bitch!” Alex sighed. Spencer raised an eyebrow. “Toby didn't…what?” Alex got up, crossed the room over to the wall facing Spencer’s bed, and opened a hidden compartment in the wall, where a button was revealed. She hit it.

The wall at the end of Spencer’s bed slid open to reveal a shiny, moderately sized bathroom, and Spencer leapt to her feet. “There ya go,” Alex smirked. “There’s a bathroom in here?!” Spencer shrieked. “Yep.” “With…with indoor plumbing?” “And a shower,” Alex shrugged. “Merlin, Spencer, I’m not that heartless.” She walked over to her sister and waved her hand in the direction of Spencer’s suitcase. “You’ll find all yer bathroom needs in there, too.” “Jesus, Alex,” Spencer managed, after the small shock had worn off. "How the hell did you manage all this?” Alex bent down, pulled out a key from her shoe and unlocked Spencer’s chain. It fell to the floor with a clank.“You can have an hour to shower and freshen up,” Alex nodded. “But you have to go back in the chain after.”

Spencer nodded. She was so revealed she grabbed her suitcase and hurried into the bathroom. God, it was glamorous. It was shiny and clean, with a decent sized tub. 

She unzipped her suitcase, delighted to find not only clothes, but pillows, blankets and shampoo. She pulled out a change of clothes, and everything she’d need for her shower. “Thank you, Alex,” Spencer called out, changing out of her clothes. She turned on the shower, adjusted the temperature to HOT, and stepped under the stream.

“Why do you have this?” Mona asked, eyeing Hanna’s computer warily. The two were cuddled together on Hanna’s – er, Lucas’ – couch, in front of Hanna’s laptop.

“It’s fun,” Hanna shrugged, scrolling through her Dashboard.

“How long have you had this?” Mona asked, arching an eyebrow.

“Uh, just a few days. But look at how many followers we have!" Hanna pointed excitedly at her screen.

"I can’t believe you have a Tumblr.” Mona shook her head. 

Hanna had created a Tumblr account for the six of them – herself, Spencer, Emily, Aria, Alison, and Mona. The blog had a pink and black background with girly, spiral-like white font. The blogged was called 

The Liars 6, and Hanna blogged about their lives, though nothing she knew the others wouldn’t mind sharing. Not that she had asked them, but whatever. They already had a substantial amount of followers, which wasn’t a surprise. Everyone knew who they were; you didn’t have to live in Rosewood to know about the Pretty Little Liars, the name some cliquey magazine had once dubbed them. 

So far, Hanna had posted about their week: Ezra standing Aria up, the sleepover they had, the games they’d played, and of course, what she and Mona had done.

Mona didn’t particularly care that Hanna had told the entire Internet that they’d slept together, but a heads up would have been nice.

“You have some messages,” Mona pointed to the red number above the envelope symbol in the middle of a row of icons in the upper right-hand corner. “Oh!” Hanna slid her cursor over and clicked on it. Immediately a string of messages in gray boxes popped up. She licked her lips and read the first one she saw.

“Hanna, who tops? Mona, right? – D.A.”

Hanna frowned. "What the hell kind of message is this? Who the fuck is D.A.? Is that A.D. backwards?” Panic shot through her, but she calmed down instantly when she felt Mona’s hand on her shoulder

“It’s probably one of your followers,” Mona said gently. “Reply to them and ask them what it stands for.” Hanna scrolled down to another question sent in by an anonymous user. 

“Spencer, can you help me with my paper on metaphysics philosophy’ – P.A.?" 

What the hell is that? Metaphysics philosophy? That sounds gross.”

“Ha!” Mona snickered and pointed to another message someone had sent in. “Look at this one. Aria, I feel like you’d be a weird flapper girl or a candy striper from the '20s? Am I right? – Ea2 Hanna giggled. "These people are funny. Hey, look! Someone likes Spence and Aria together,” she said, pointing to a message someone sent in that just read:

“TEAM SPARIAAAAA. SPENCER AND ARIA BELONG TOGETHER.”

“It’s weird that people ship them together,” Hanna’s nose wrinkled. “People ship us together, too,” Mona reminded Hanna, pointing out the message sent by the user who had simply gone by ’D.A.’ “Should I answer them?” Hanna asked, more to herself than to Mona. “Hell yeah!” Mona grinned and grabbed Hanna’s laptop. Her fingers flew over the keyboard as she typed a response: Hey, hey, D.A.! Mona here. Great question. I top, obviously. What, did you really think Hanna would? – M.V. She hit POST before Hanna could stop her.

“Mona!” Hanna gasped.

Mona stuck out her tongue and turned back to the screen. She clicked on another question.

Mona again. Sorry. P.A., Spencer didn’t read this. I can help if you’re interested. Let me know! ☺ - M.V. Mona posted the answered question and scrolled through a few other ones. She smiled and nudged Hanna, who had turned her attention to her phone. “Hey, Han?” “What?” Hanna glanced up from her phone. “Look.” Mona pointed to a message. Hanna leaned over so she could read it. Someone had said: “I think you and Mona are really cute together!” Hanna mirrored Mona’s smile. “Well. They aren’t wrong. Hey, should we answer more of these?” “Yeah!” Mona smirked. “This could be fun.”

“Get off me!” “No!” “Alex!” “Spencer!” “You’re not being fair!” “All’s fair in love and war,” Alex teased. Spencer shoved her shoulder into Alex’s, momentarily causing Alex to drop her controller. “Ha!” she smirked triumphantly. 

After her shower, Spencer had come out to see that Alex had remade her bed with fresh bedding, and had even added a soft mattress topper while she was in the shower. Alex had also dragged in a larger desk, which housed flat-screen TV and a PlayStation 4 game console. The two had been playing Mortal Kombat for almost an hour now.

“You cheated!” Alex exclaimed. “Not fair. Rematch?” “You were jumping on my guy!” Spencer protested. Across Spencer’s cell, Ezra made a loud, obnoxious humming sound to her the girls’ attention. Both girls looked up.

“Uh, can I play?” Ezra asked hopefully. He was bored out of his mind. “Piss off,” Alex and Spencer snapped in unison. The twins giggled at each other and Alex playfully bumped her sister’s shoulder. “Okay, round two. Allow me to kick your arse.”

[mrhotmaster]

Best Netflix Hindi Movies Of April 2020 In India To Watch

The Best Hindi Movies Of April 2020 On Netflix In India

Below is the list of all Hindi movies from Andhadhun To Udta Punjab on Netflix to watch in India 

In the past year, Netflix has made huge strides on the movie the front in India: it signed an extended-term address Karan Johar, and it has a gaggle of upcoming projects from the likes of Shah Rukh Khan, Anushka Sharma, Ajay Devgn, Anurag Kashyap, Vikramaditya Motwane, and Dibakar Banerjee. But the ones are still to return, and thus far, aside from Soni, none has been a clear winner. For now, the exceptional Hindi movies on Netflix belong to different studios. And happily, the sector's biggest streaming carrier has some amazing partnerships in the vicinity, despite the fact that it's nonetheless too reliant on stuff from the existing century.

ALSO SEE

April 2020 TV Series List: Hotstar, Netflix & Amazon Prime

To pick out the fine Hindi-language films on Netflix, we trusted Rotten Tomatoes and IMDb rankings, and different critics reviews, to create a shortlist. The latter two were preferred because RT does not provide a complete illustration of evaluations for Indian movies. Additionally, we used our own editorial judgment to feature or get rid of a few. This list may be up to date once every few months if there are any worthy additions or if some movies are removed from the provider, so bookmark this page and maintain checking in. Here are the pleasant Hindi films currently to be had on Netflix in India, taken care of alphabetically.

ALSO SEE

Amazon Prime Video Series: April 2020 Releases

Andhadhun (2018)

Inspired via the French brief film L'Accordeur, this black comedy thriller is the tale of a piano participant (Ayushmann Khurrana) who pretends to be visually impaired and is stuck on the internet of twists and lies after he walks into a murder scene. Tabu, Radhika Apte celebrity along.

Aamir (2008)

Adapted from the 2006 Filipino film Cavite, a young Muslim NRI doctor (Rajeev Khandelwal) getting back from the United Kingdom to India is forced to comply with terrorists' needs to perform a bombing in Mumbai after they threaten his family.

Andaz Apna Apna (1994)

Two slackers (Aamir Khan and Salman Khan) who belong to middle-class families fight for the affections of the heir and unintentionally become protectors of the central gangster in Rajkumar Santoshi's cult comedy classic.

Article 15 (2019)

Ayushmann Khurrana is a cop in this portrayal of casteism, non-secular prejudice, and the modern-day socio-political condition in India, which explores the absence of prosecution against three adolescent girls in a small village. A hard-hitting, nicely-made film, even if satirically, has been criticized for being a caste player and having an outsider's perspective.

3 Idiots (2009)

In this satire of the Indian schooling gadget's social pressures, pals recount their university days and how their 0.33 long-misplaced musketeer (Aamir Khan) stimulated them to suppose creatively and independently in a heavily-conformist international. Co-written and directed by means of Rajkumar Hirani, who stands accused inside the #MeToo movement.

Barfi! (2012)

Set within the 1970s amidst the hills of Darjeeling, writer-director Anurag Basu tells the story of three humans (Ranbir Kapoor, Priyanka Chopra, and Ileana D'Cruz) as they learn to love at the same time as fighting the notions held by using society.

Bawarchi (1972)

This remake of the 1966 Bengali movie Galpa Holeo Satya reunited the Anand trio of Rajesh Khanna, Hrishikesh Mukherjee, and Amitabh Bachchan, although the latter has a voice-most effective position. It's about a prepare dinner (Khanna) who offers to paintings in a household recognized for its unwell-remedy of domestic assist, handiest to grow to be the apple of everybody's eye earlier than disappearing with the family jewels.

The Blue Umbrella (2005)

Based on Ruskin Bond's 1980 eponymous novella, the tale of a young girl in rural Himachal Pradesh whose blue umbrella will become the item of fascination for the whole village, riding a shopkeeper (Pankaj Kapur) to desperation. A National Award winner directed through Vishal Bhardwaj.

Budhia Singh: Born to Run (2016)

Before he guided Jamtara for Netflix, author-director Soumendra Padhi brought us this first-of - an a-genuine-story tale of the youngest marathon runner in the world, the titular five-year-old (Mayur Patole), who completed almost 50 marathons under the tutelage of his teaching (Manoj Bajpayeee). Padhi had auditioned over 1,200 children before picking Patole.

Bareilly Ki Barfi (2017)

After an unfastened-spirited, younger woman (Kriti Sanon) in small-town Uttar Pradesh chances upon an eponymous ebook whose protagonist reads exactly like her, she units out approximately looking for the writer (Rajkummar Rao) with the help of the printing-press owner and novel publisher (Ayushmann Khurrana). Many critics loved Rao's work, whilst some observed trouble with its unsubtle script.

Dil Chahta Hai (2001)

Farhan Akhtar's directorial debut about 3 inseparable formative years buddies whose wildly special technique to relationships creates stress on their friendship stays a cult favored. Aamir Khan, Saif Ali Khan, and Preity Zinta famous people.

Delhi Belly (2011)

Three suffering buddies and flatmates (Imran Khan, Kunaal Roy Kapur, and Vir Das) are unwillingly stuck in the lure of a lethal crime syndicate in India's capital. Praised for his satire, his speed, his imagination, and his goofiness, even though a few have had issues with his over-reliance on scatological humor. It's all in English, and while there's a Hindi version, it's not on Netflix yet.

Dev.D (2009)

Anurag Kashyap gives a present day-day reimagining of Sarat Chandra Chattopadhyay's Bengali romance conventional Devdas, in which a man (Abhay Deol), having broken up along with his formative year's sweetheart, unearths safe haven in alcohol and tablets, before falling for a prostitute (Kalki Koechlin).

Dangal (2016)

The notable proper tale of amateur wrestler Mahavir Singh Phogat (Aamir Khan) who trains his daughters to turn out to be India's first world-class female wrestlers, who went directly to win gold medals on the Commonwealth Games.

Dhanak (2016)

This National Award-triumphing film from author-director Nagesh Kukunoor is the tale of two siblings — a 10-year-antique lady and her visually-impaired, 8-12 months-vintage brother — who set out on a 300-km adventure across the desert of Rajasthan to locate actor and goodwill ambassador Shah Rukh Khan, believing he can assist with a cornea transplant.

Drishyam (2015)

Ajay Devgn and Tabu megastar on this remake of 2013 critically praised Malayalam special, about a small cable operator (Devgn) who is doing everything he can to shield his own children, accused inside the missing-men and women's case of the son of a high-ranking police officer (Tabu) who was blackmailing his daughter with a nude photo. It's overlong and easy, watch the original — on Hotstar — if you're all right with the subtitles.

Dil Se.. (1998)

Shah Rukh Khan portrays a radio journalist who fell for an enigmatic feminist (Manisha Koirala) in this third and very last part of the author-director Mani Ratnam's thematic trilogy portraying a love tale against a political backdrop. It is the rebellion in Northeast India. Often recognized as A.R. The paintings of Rahman, in particular, the title music and "Chaiyya Chaiyya."

Gurgaon (2017)

Set within the titular Haryana city, this neo-noir thriller explores gender inequality and the dark underbelly of the suburban wastelands via a tale of an actual property mogul's (Pankaj Tripathi) undisciplined son who kidnaps his very own sister to repay a gambling loss. Its grittiness did not especially match audiences, however, critics were greater appreciative.

Gol Maal (1979)

A chartered accountant (Amol Palekar), with a knack for singing and performing, falls deep down the rabbit hole after mendacity to his boss that he has a twin, in this Hrishikesh Mukherjee comedy.

Guru (2007)

Mani Ratnam wrote and directed this rags-to-riches tale of a ruthless and formidable businessman (Abhishek Bachchan) who does not let something stand in his way as he turns into India's largest rich person. Loosely stimulated by using the lifestyles of Dhirubhai Ambani.

Hazaaron Khwaishein Aisi (2003)

Set in opposition to the politically-charged backdrop of the Emergency in the Nineteen Seventies, author-director Sudhir Mishra's film revolves around three friends (Kay Kay Menon, Chitrangada Singh, and Shiney Ahuja) whose lives are converted inside the wake of the turbulent period.

Haider (2014)

The Shakespearean trio from Vishal Bhardwaj was finished with the contemporary version of Hamlet, which is also fully based on the Curfewed Kashmir Memoir of Basharat Peer's 1990s (CNP). It follows a younger man (Shahid Kapoor) back home in a continuing violent upsurge to investigate the death of his wife.

Hamid (2019)

Sitting in the midst of the most insurgent neighborhood on the world stage, a younger Kashmiri kid attempts to reach out to his brother he's ever met to his uncle, whom Allah is ordered to be with. It was mohd's base. Amin Bhat's 'Cell No.786' was awarded the National Prize, although it was deemed a little tougher by other observers.

I Am Kalam (2010)

A smart and poor kid (Harsh Mayar), the son of a former noble family and influenced by India's late President A. P. J. Abdul Kalam, whose social circle in his youth had a destructive impact, has become a directorial debut of Nila Madhab Panda. Mayar was awarded a national prize.

Ittefaq (2017)

Inspired by means of the 1969 Yash Chopra movie of the identical name, which itself became a remake of the 1965 movie Signpost to Murder, an acclaimed author (Sidharth Malhotra) and a younger homemaker (Sonakshi Sinha), the best witnesses and suspects in a double homicide, gift special variations of activities to the investigating officer (Akshaye Khanna).

Jaane Tu... Ya Jaane Na (2008)

Imran Khan made his appearing debut — in creator Abbas Tyrewala's directorial debut — as Jai, a mild-mannered, peace-loving younger man, who is the opposite of his high-quality pal Aditi (Genelia D'Souza). The two start to look for a companion publish-university, oblivious and blind to how perfect they are for every other, as their pals and own family recognize very well.

Jodhaa Akbar (2008)

This 16th-century epic is a probably 3.5 hour-long tale of the same Mughal emperor (Hrithik Roshan) and Rajput princess (Aishwarya Rai), who, as he knows, is still his identical political union, and who will become true love. In a rising number of intolerant India, his message has only been informed but strong. It's led by Gowariker Ashutosh.

Koshish (1972)

In 1961 Gulzar rebuilt the Japanese film Happiness of Us Alone as a deaf and mute pair with Sanjeev Kumar and Jaya Bhaduri (now Bachchan). Their lives had been influenced by their courtship for several years, as their young people had started. Gulzar and Kumar were both recognized for their composure and their iconic depiction of illness on an Indian show computer.

Kahaani (2012)

A pregnant girl (Vidya Balan) travels from London to Kolkata to search for her lacking husband in creator-director Sujoy Ghosh's National Award-triumphing mystery, scuffling with sexism and a cowl-up along the way.

Kapoor & Sons (2016)

After the heart failure of their grandfather (Rishi Kapoor), distant brothers return to their home adolescence where they have to confront a host of other issues in their society. The star is Alia Bhatt and Ratna Pathak Shah.

Khosla Ka Ghosla! (2006)

Having kept a successful property supplier (Boman Irani), his son and his son's friends are forming a scheme to replicate a swindling squatter and compensate him less for it along with his own cash, to compensate for a freshly acquired property for a ransom. The directorial debut of Dibakar Banerjee.

Lagaan (2001)

Set in the very peak of British Raj in a remote, ruined Indian region, a village farmer (Aamir Khan) is all about cricket fun with the good colonists, exchanging three years for tax relief. He was named for the Oscars by director Ashutosh Gowariker.

Lage Raho Munna Bhai (2006)

The eponymous underworld don of Mumbai (Sanjay Dutt) continues to be electronic to the radio jockey with whom he has been smitten in this sequel to the original 2003 (also included in the list). Remarked for his willingness to combine the word with enjoyment while others think he fell into Gandhian. Co-written and directed in the # MeToo campaign, by Rajkumar Hirani.

The Lunchbox (2013)

Four managers – Anurag Kashyap, Zoya Akhtar, Dibakar Banerjee, and Karan Johar – are responsible for four separate components of this anthology series, which is based on four women's romantic lives, deepening their passion, energy, place and natural urge. Popular for their credibility and their portrayal on the television of real people. A Netflix Original.

Lust Stories (2018)

Four administrators — Anurag Kashyap, Zoya Akhtar, Dibakar Banerjee, and Karan Johar — helm four unique components of this anthology drama that focuses on the romantic lives of 4 women, delving into love, strength, status, and naturally, lust. Popular for their credibility and their portrayal on the television of real people. An original Netflix.

Lootera (2013)

Set in West Bengal in the early 1950s with the elimination of the regime by the zamindari, the young writer and daughter of a Zamindar (Sonakshi Sinha) is an archaeologist (Ranveer). This drama stimulated through O is directed by Vikramaditya Motwane. The short tale "The Last Seed" by Henry in 1907. His graphics were widely appreciated, but the love tale wobbled.

Manto (2018)

The existence of Pakistani writer Saadat Hasan Manto (Nawazuddin Siddiqui) — one of the best Urdu writers of the 20th century — before and after the Partition of British India, whose acclaimed lifestyles in then-Bombay is uprooted and unearths his work being challenged in Lahore. Nandita Das directs.

Munna Bhai M.B.B.S. (2003)

Highly normal Mumbai subworld don (Sanjay Dutt) attempts to save his life by enrolment in medical colleges, and his humanity bends to the oppressive dean (Boman Irani). When his mother and dad learn that their son is pretending to be a doctor. Co-written and directed using the # MeToo Movement by Rajkumar Hirani.

Mard Ko Dard Nahi Hota (2018)

Born with an extraordinary circumstance that doesn't permit him to experience physical pain, a boy who grew up watching martial arts films trains to defend the prone and longs to satisfy the one-legged man who won hundred-men combat. Praised for being a fun trip that trades on film nostalgia, although it would not aspire to be greater than a crowd-pleaser.

Masaan (2015)

Neeraj Ghaywan is investigating the lives of four men at his directing debut in the heartland of India, who will all battle caste, tradition and norms. State Award Winner and the Cannes FIPRESCI Medal.

Masoom (1983)

Shekhar Kapur's directorial debut changed into an uncredited model of Erich Segal's 1983 novel “Man, Woman, and Child”, wherein the joyful existence of a family is disrupted after an orphan boy — born of the husband's (Naseeruddin Shah) affair with every other female — involves stay with them. It's a real tear-jerker, thoughts you, and complex in some places.

No One Killed Jessica (2011)

In 1999, a journalist-activist (Rani Mukerji) and the victim's sister (Vidya Balan) have brought the rightful son of a famous leader into court on the grounds of the assassination complaint against her in 1999. Extremely praised, while others have doubted their heaviness.

OMG: Oh My God! (2012)

A remake of the 2001 Australian movie The Man Who Sued God, and additionally based totally on the Gujarati play Kanji Virudh Kanji, this satirical comedy-drama follows a small-time shopkeeper (Paresh Rawal) who documents a lawsuit in opposition to God after a low-intensity earthquake — legally dubbed as an “act of God” — ends in the financial spoil. Akshay Kumar also stars.

Oye Lucky! Lucky Oye! (2008)

The inspirational acclaimed thief (Abhay Deol), who after having been detained, recounts his life that began in a negative suburban West Delhi home, is ready to conduct Dibakar Banerjee's 'second directing company, as well as to the way he became media celebrity with a spree of burglary.

Paan Singh Tomar (2012)

An actual tale of the eponymous soldier and athlete (Irrfan Khan) who received gold at the National Games, and later turned into a dacoit to clear up a land dispute. Won pinnacle honors for movie and actor (Khan) at National Awards.

Pink (2016)

A legal professional (Amitabh Bachchan) comes out of retirement to assist 3 girls (Taapsee Pannu, Kirti Kulhari, and Andrea Tariang) to clean their names against the law involving a politician's nephew (Angad Bedi). Won a National Award.

PK (2014)

A surreal comedy-drama that explores religious dogmas and superstitions through the eyes of an alien (Aamir Khan) streaked on Earth as he drops his private communicator and makes friends with a TV anchor (Anushka Sharma).

Peepli [Live] (2010)

In the run-up to an election, the farmer is pursuing the assistance of an apathetic leader who advocates suicide in order to profit from the central government's policy that requires households of departing farmers to forfeit his property owing to an unpaid government mortgage. An incisive critique on Indian farmers 'suicides, the media and political circus. Aamir Khan and Kiran Rao's aunt produced it.

Queen (2013)

A 24-year-antique shy girl (Kangana Ranaut) units off on her honeymoon by myself to Europe after her fiancé calls off the wedding a day previously. There, freed from the traditional trappings and with the help of new pals, she profits a newfound perspective on existence. Won two National Awards. Co-written and directed by way of Vikas Bahl, who stands accused within the #MeToo motion.

Rang De Basanti (2006)

Aamir Khan leads the ensemble forged of this award-prevailing film that makes a specialty of four young New Delhi men who change into innovative heroes themselves even as playacting as five Indian freedom fighters from the Twenties for a docudrama.

Stree (2018)

Based on a Karnataka city legend — although transported to small-metropolis Madhya Pradesh within the movie — this Raj Nidimoru and Krishna D.K.-written comedy-horror follow a girls' garb tailor (Rajkummar Rao) who falls for a mysterious female (Shraddha Kapoor), who regularly disappears.

Swades (2004)

Shah Rukh Khan stars a successful NASA scientist on this based on a real tale drama, who returns domestic to India to take his nanny to the USA, rediscovers his roots and connects with the local village community inside the procedure.

Shaitan (2011)

Blackmailed by means of a Mumbai cop after successful-and-run, five buddies (Kalki Koechlin among them) level a fake kidnapping with a plan to gather the ransom on this black comedy. While a few observed it spell-binding, others were removed by its attempts to encounter as ‘hip' and ‘cool'. Produced by Anurag Kashyap.

Soni (2019)

In their everyday lives and paintings through which it influences their organizing attempts to resolve the upward drive of crimes against women through Delhi, a teenage cop who has a wave of brief anger and a cool-headed lady supervisor will battle with a profound mistake. An original Netflix.

Special 26 (2013)

Inspired by way of the 1987 Opera House heist in then-Bombay, Akshay Kumar stars as one in every of several conmen posing as authorities sellers running for the CBI — India's equivalent of the FBI — who execute a fake income tax raid on an outstanding jeweler. Neeraj Pandey (A Wednesday!) writes and directs.

Sadma (1983)

Balu Mahendra remade his very own 1982 Tamil film Moondram Pirai with Kamal Haasan, Sridevi, and Silk Smitha reprising their roles from the authentic. It's the story of a younger female (Sridevi) with retrograde amnesia who regresses to a baby's intellectual nation and finally ends up in a brothel, wherein she's rescued by means of a lonely college trainer (Haasan).

Secret Superstar (2017)

Though often melodramatic, this coming-of-age tale — produced by using Aamir Khan and wife Kiran Rao — of a Muslim woman from Vadodara who goals of being a singer dealt with important social problems and broke numerous field office information in the course of its theatrical run.

Taare Zameen Par (2007)

Sent to boarding school towards his will, a dyslexic 8-12 months-vintage is helped through an unconventional art teacher (Aamir Khan) to conquer his incapacity and discover his authentic ability.

Talaash (2012)

The ensemble of this psychological crime drama is headed by Aamir Khan, Rani Mukerji, and Kareena Kapoor, in which a police officer (Khan) will face up to his future in order to settle a murder of a rank that includes an intimacy employee (Kapoor) and an opponent (Mukerji). Additional manager, co-written by Zoya Akhtar and Reema Kagti. Pretty much commended, but a few think it seeks so hard.

Talvar (2015)

In 2008, a dual-hostility case in Noida was murdered by a teenage woman with an employee of the family; and the incompetent police bungle the probe with Meghna Gulzar and Vishal Bhardwaj, together to combine powers. Uses the influence of Rashomon to take three measures.

Tu Hai Mera Sunday (2016)

In the light of their heartfelt romantic story, which discusses gender and social divide alongside the other direction, 530 friends were at war to find a position in Mumbai where they could play football peacefully.

Udaan (2010)

Vikramaditya Motwane made his directing debut with this forthcoming tale about a youth expelled from the boarding school and returned home to the Jamshedpur company region where he had to paint at his father's restrictive factory.

Udta Punjab (2016)

The dark comedy crime film shows the interwoven lives of a junior police officer (Diljit Dosanjh), a welfare activist (Kareena Kapoor), a stripper (Alia Bhatt) and a pop star (Shahid Kapoor), with the Indian opioid crisis as a backdrop.

Wake Up Sid (2009)

A wealthy, carefree and privileged son (Ranbir Kapoor), a prosperous Mumbai businessman, feels like an unholy awakening when his college fails very recent exams, after which a desiring writer friend (Konkona Sen Sharma) from Kolkata starts taking more accountability and becoming independent of himself. The directorial debut of Ayan Mukerji.

A Wednesday! (2008)

Neeraj Pandey's movie is ready between 2 pm and 6 pm on a Wednesday, obviously, while a not unusual guy (Naseeruddin Shah) threatens to detonate five bombs in Mumbai until 4 terrorists accused in the 2006 Mumbai teach bombings case are released.

 For Regular & Fastest Tech News and Reviews, Follow TECHNOXMART on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Subscribe Here Now. By Subscribing You Will Get Our Daily Digest Headlines Every Morning Directly In Your Email Inbox.             【Join Our Whatsapp Group Here】

from https://ift.tt/2UGunPE

[rathertoofondofbooks]

  This week has been an okay week, it was nice not to have any medical appointments or treatment and to be able to just potter about at home.

I’ve not managed to read quite as much as usual as I spent time catching up on Broadchurch (I’m sad this has ended as I loved it) and Big Little Lies (I read the book when it first came out but I can only remember half of how it ends so I’m intrigued to see how it all turns out. No spoilers please as it doesn’t air in the UK until tomorrow night. I think the casting for this show has been perfect and has made it such a brilliant series. I’ll miss it when it ends). I don’t watch a lot of TV but when I find a programme I like I tend to get hooked until it’s finished.

As I’m writing this post it’s Friday afternoon… I’m finishing and scheduling this post early this week (I normally write and schedule in advance and then amend the night before it posts if I’ve started or finished any other books) as I’m hoping to go record shopping on Saturday morning with my husband. It’s Record Store Day and there are some fab-sounding records on the list that we’d love to get.  I’ll update my instagram with our purchases and will write about how it went in next Sunday’s wrap-up post. I’m so hoping I manage to go – I haven’t left the house, other than for a handful of medical appointments, in literally months as I’ve been too unwell so it would be brilliant to get out.

  This week I’ve finished reading three books:

No Turning Back by Tracy Buchanan

I’ve had this on my TBR since it was published and this week it caught my eye in my audio library and I decided to pick it up. I listened to it over a couple of days and enjoyed it.

What I Talk About When I Talk About Running by Haruki Murakami

This was a really interesting listen that I very much enjoyed. It may seem odd to read a book about marathon running when I can’t walk more than a handful of tiny steps but there was so much in this book that really struck a chord with me. It’s interesting to read about his writing process too. I’d recommend this.

This Love by Dani Atkins

I read this book in two sittings and fell completely in love with the story. This is one of those books that stays in your mind after you finish reading and I think it’ll be a rare book that I re-read in the future. I reviewed this on my blog this week so you can read my thoughts here if you’d like to.

  This week I’ve blogged six times:

Sunday: Weekly Wrap-Up post

Monday: The Affair by Amanda Brooke

Tuesday: Interview with Jennifer Gilmour, author of Isolation Junction

#gallery-0-23 { margin: auto; } #gallery-0-23 .gallery-item { float: left; margin-top: 10px; text-align: center; width: 33%; } #gallery-0-23 img { border: 2px solid #cfcfcf; } #gallery-0-23 .gallery-caption { margin-left: 0; } /* see gallery_shortcode() in wp-includes/media.php */

Wednesday: WWW Wednesday post

Thursday: Review of This Love by Dani Atkins

Saturday: Stacking the Shelves post

  This is what I’m currently reading:

Dead Woman Walking by Sharon Bolton

I pre-ordered this book when I first heard about it and then forgot when release day was so it was a fab surprise this week when it arrived on my Kindle. I’m already reading this and am hooked, it’s such a great premise for a novel.

Luuurve is a Many Trousered Thing by Louise Rennison

I love this series of books, it never fails to make me smile (even though I’m way older than the target audience) as it’s such fun writing. I was feeling really down yesterday after my fall so picked this up and it’s a perfect read for just now.

The Comfort of Others by Kay Langdale

This book is gorgeous, I can’t quite put into words how much I’m loving this book. I’m deliberately reading it slowly to savour it. I’m on the blog tour for this on Monday and have a lovely interview with Kay that I can’t wait to share.

  Titanic Lives by Richard Davenport-Hines

I’m still listening to the audio book of this and am finding it really interesting. Some of the things I knew and others I didn’t, the book is a really nice mix of stories about people involved in the building, or who were due to sail on the Titanic.

He Said/She Said by Erin Kelly

I’ve not picked this up much this week as I’ve been listening to more audio books. I’m really keen to know where this story is going though and really hope to pick this back up very soon.

How to Survive a Plague by David France

This is another book that’s suffered from me leaning more towards audio books this week but I was finding this absolutely fascinating and I really want to get back to it this week.

  Update on my TBR:

TBR at the start of January 2017: 1885 (see my State of the TBR post)

TBR in last week’s Wrap-Up: 1929

Additions:

Books bought/received for review/gifts: 12

Subtractions:

Books read this week: 3

Books I’m currently reading: 6

TBR Books culled this week: 0

Total:

TBR now stands at: 1941

  I’m linking this post up to Kimberly at Caffeinated Book Reviewer’s Sunday Blog Share.  It’s a chance to share news~ A post to recap the past week on your blog and showcase books and things we have received. Share news about what is coming up on our blog for the week ahead.

  How has your week been? What have you been reading? Please share in the comments below. If you write a wrap-up on your blog please feel free to share the link. 🙂

Weekly Wrap-Up (23 April) This week has been an okay week, it was nice not to have any medical appointments or treatment and to be able to just potter about at home.