#I found one the other day in the living room

[lemonlover1110]

𝐁𝐨𝐧𝐝𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐅𝐫𝐮𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧

Sukuna

[Chapter 1] Offerings

Story Masterlist

Pairing: Trueform!Sukuna x f!Reader

*Just want to preface that this is a historical AU but there will be some historical inaccuracies so if you see something odd, don't point it out. Also this is still a curse AU! if that isn't clear with four-armed Sukuna. Anyway I hope you enjoy!! Any general story warnings can be found in the masterlist!

Discord +18 - Twitter - Ko-Fi

Sukuna is missing something, he’s not sure what it is but he knows that he’s bored. He’s bored of everything that once thrilled him, tired of the same routine. But no matter what he does, he feels empty. 

He’s done everything possible to soothe that boredom, which has come to the expense of many lives. It entertained him until it didn’t. Occasionally he does find joy in the horrors that he causes but it doesn’t feel like that’s enough anymore. There’s something that he’s missing, but he’s not quite sure what it is. 

He has everything a man could possibly want– Although he isn’t exactly a man so his wants and needs are obviously different. He isn’t going to be fulfilled by the foolish ideals of happiness that men have. He doesn’t have much of a guide though, therefore he’s lost in how to fix his problem. 

“Uraume.” Sukuna’s voice isn’t all that loud, yet Uraume nearly comes running to fulfill his request. The temple is uncomfortably quiet; everyone is ready to fulfill Sukuna’s every request, and their king does not raise his voice unless adrenaline rushes through him, or he’s upset. No one knows which is the worst of the two. 

“My king.” Uraume kneels down before him. He’s quiet, too embarrassed to even bring up this question. It’s unlike him. Uraume is truly the only person that he respects which is why asking the question is hard for him to actually say. He wouldn’t trust anyone else with it though.

“What do men usually do?” He asks, which is odd for Uraume to hear. Sukuna was a man too, once upon a time. But he doesn’t remember that stage of his life, and he’s sure he wasn’t happy either which is the reason why he’s the monster he is now.

“I’m not sure.” They sound reluctant. “If you could be more clear, I can search for an answer.”

“Get out.” He orders, and they bow again before exiting the room. He wants to be left alone to gather his thoughts. He has all the time in the world to figure himself out, but he wants even more time. He doesn’t want to be bothered now of all times at the very least.

“There’s a woman with an offering.” A servant tells him from the other side of the tatami doors, followed by a shrill cry that makes a smirk come to his lips. That’s his answer.

Sukuna wants a successor. 

“Take it to the servants, answer to her needs.” Sukuna answers, not really caring to listen to any requests. His mind is now preoccupied, detailing his next course of action. He needs to find the perfect woman to carry his heir, which he knows will be a hard task– Perhaps the hardest challenge that Sukuna has come by in all of his years of living.

“Please eat, Haru.” You put the bowl beside the young boy’s mat. You’ve been slowly watching your brother’s health deteriorate, slowly watching his death near. Worst of all, you have been looking for a cure that seems impossible to find because it’s not something that’s affecting anyone important. 

It’s not a disease that’s affecting anybody else, really. It’s not infectious, you quickly found that out. You were glad about it at first, but then you realized that there’s no cure yet. Days pass by, and he gets worse. He refuses to eat anything, and when he does, he can’t keep it down for more than a few hours. His death is imminent.

“I did everything I could to get the right ingredients for your favorite food. Auntie made it extra special for you.” You make sure to tell him, but he can barely move. You kneel down beside him, grabbing his utensils and preparing a bite. “Just one bite, Haru.”

“I’m sleepy.” Is all he manages to mutter, and you feel a pull on your heartstrings. Your hand caresses his arm.

“Just one bite, okay? Then you can sleep all day.” You try your best to convince him. All he does is sleep, and no matter how many hours he sleeps, he wakes up tired. He prompts himself up, and you’re fighting back a smile– It’s barely any progress, if you can even call it that. “Open up.”

There’s a smile on your lips as you bring the food to his mouth, and he begins to chew. He takes the utensils from your hand, grabbing the bowl of food and putting it on his lap. You stand up and tell him, “I’ll get you some water.”

“He’s finally eating something.” You share with your aunt, making sure your voice is low since there isn’t all that much space. Her eyes go to him, and she really wants to say that it’s a sign of him getting better but it really doesn’t mean anything. Sometimes he eats everything that’s made for him, but he throws it back up. 

“I really wish this meant he was getting better… But we both know that he’ll get worse tomorrow.” She responds, and you want to curse her for even mentioning it but you know she’s right. You don’t like hearing it though, you’re helpless. There’s nothing more you can do for Haru, you’re just waiting for the day to come. 

“I really think he can get better.” Your eyes begin to feel with tears, knowing that you don’t even believe yourself. You’ve tried everything you possibly can, but you know that his time nears. You can’t just accept that fact though, he’s your baby brother, you can’t let him go. “Let me get his water.”

“I’ll get it… Think about what the medic said.” Your aunt reminds you of the visit from the physician. One that you’ve forgotten because you refuse to consider his one and only suggestion a possibility. The words flow back to your head,

“Your best bet is the deity up north. You have to bring him an offering, and if he deems it worthy enough, he will cure him.” “But if he thinks it’s beneath him, he’ll kill you.”

You don’t want to risk anything, but lately that seems like your only option. He’s not getting any better, even though you so badly want to say that he is. Throwing up everything he eats is not much improvement than not eating at all. You just have to figure out what is considered an offering worthy for the deity to save him, and to save yourself. 

“I’ll be back, I have to figure something out.” You say, smiling back at your aunt and your little brother. They barely acknowledge you before you leave the house, which you’re thankful for. You just need a moment to gather your thoughts, decide what you’ll do next. 

You need to sort out your offering for the deity, an offering that will hopefully sort out all of your problems.

“My king, there’s a woman with an offering.” It feels like the hundredth time that week in which Sukuna hears that sentence. Humans are greedy beings, and they all fucking need something. It’s unnecessary, purely materialistic– It’s a side of humanity that he appreciates though. How much a human is willing to sacrifice for wealth or the promise of good fortune. Sukuna can’t judge, he's the sole winner in the end.

“Let her in.” He says, and the tatami door slides open. A poor maiden with a pale yellow kimono, and a woven basket in hand. You walk in with your head down, following the strict instructions that were given to you. 

You’re trembling as you kneel down in front of the deity, bowing down to him. You remain bowing for however long he pleases, keeping your eyes shut because there’s tears building up. You have never been this terrified. Willingly putting yourself at death’s door is no easy feat.

“Rise.” He orders, and you straighten your upper body, remaining on your knees. You don’t dare look anywhere past his feet, keeping your eyes low and steady. You know that he’s staring you down, studying you. A smirk on his lips, thinking about how he’s found her. “What do you want?”

“My brother…” Your voice is shaky, and you try your best to compose yourself. You can’t start crying in the middle of it, you’ve gotten this far, he’ll surely kill you if you begin to sob at his feet. “He’s sick. The medic can’t cure him, and he told us you were our only choice.”

He’s not really listening. Something about a brother is all he grasped. He’s more into the way your lips move, and the tears of pure fear that well up in your eyes. He can tell that you really made an effort into your look today, even though you don’t look extravagant. Which for some reason he likes, he doesn’t want an arrogant woman in his chambers, he already has enough of them. He especially doesn’t want one of them carrying his heir.

What really draws him in is that certain look in your eyes. The clear innocence that’s written all over your face. You’re the perfect lily that he can’t wait to tear apart, petal by petal. That finalizes his decision.

“What do you have for me? Open the basket.” He orders, and you do as he says. Regret washes over you as you open it, immediately knowing that it’s not enough. You don’t know what came over you when you had the bright idea of picking it. You unfold the cloth with shaky hands, revealing the gift for him. He’s usually furious with these types of gifts, since they hold no value to him but he wants to hear your reasoning since he has other plans with you, “Why do you come to me with this?”

“Pomegranates aren’t native to the land, and they’re scarce this time of season. I found some while searching for an offering and thought it was a sign.” You explain, and he scoffs. A stupid reason, one that should get you killed. If he wanted fruit, he would send Uraume to get it for him. He guesses it’s creative though, especially when almost every person that walks through the temple is willing to sacrifice a life. But you don’t gain points for creativity, no one ever has.

“Pomegranates? What am I supposed to do with that?” He’s mocking you, and you swallow the lump in your throat. He’s right, what is he supposed to do with a pomegranate? He’s not like you, he’s not just going to eat it. You’re usually smart about this type of thing, but you guess desperation got the best of you this time around, and now you have to pay for the consequences. As to be expected, there’s no answer from you, and he orders, “Look up at me.”

Your eyes slowly move up his body to his face, and you’re in awe at the sight. A mix of emotions flow through your body. He really isn’t a human. You were terrified earlier, but now you’re simply astonished. You never really believed the tales that were told about him since you couldn’t wrap your head around the fact that a being like him could exist. But now he stands before you.

“Do you really think I’ll do anything with the fruit?” His voice sounds serious, but there’s a hint of a smile on his lips. You shake your head which irks him. “You have a voice don’t you? Use it.”

“No, my king. My apologies.” It’s strange, but you sound more confident as you look at him compared to before. It brings some sort of satisfaction to Sukuna since usually people that are allowed to look directly at him can barely communicate.  

“I’ll give you a chance to redeem yourself.” He’s thinking about how merciful he is– Which isn’t entirely a lie since Sukuna never gives a second chance. Except you have no idea how you can redeem yourself unless he dismisses you. Little do you know what he’s thinking for you. “I have a proposal for you.”

“A what…?” Your eyebrows perk up as curiosity takes over you. A proposal from a deity, it’ll surely be something that you have yet to hear. 

“Bear my child, and I’ll forgive you.” He says, and you almost fall back. Your ears must be deceiving you, there’s no way that the proposal that you just heard is real. Your eyes are wide open, and you hear him laugh. It must be a joke then. 

“Uraume!” Sukuna yells, wanting it to be clear that he doesn’t want to waste a single second. Not even a second later, and they’re in the room, waiting for their king’s command. “Take the maiden and prepare her for me tonight.”

“Wait– You’re serious?” You dare to ask. You haven’t even agreed, yet he’s getting you ready for tonight, to have a baby with him of all things. “You don’t even know my name, why would you want me to carry your baby?”

“What’s your name then?” He asks, clearly irritated by the question, and you have no choice but to answer. If you don’t, you’re screwed. “There we have it. Take her, Uraume.”

“Wait!” You shout, but Sukuna isn’t going to listen to more of it. Uraume guides you outside, a task that they usually do harsher. At any other time, they’d be dragging you outside but you’re not just anybody. 

You’re the woman that will carry King Sukuna’s heir.

[goldsbitch]

the last time I pick you up

Moving blues hits hard. Y/N and Lando are finally letting go of her old apartment, which brings out strong emotions, that you need to burn out somehow.

warning: smut, no protection

It's been long time coming - finally moving together after countless times of flipping a coin to determine which apartment you and Lando would spend your free hours and sometimes even days.

His place was spacious and the location was obviously the biggest asset. But god, was it close to an empty wasteland. True "lad's" apartment, up to a point you were surprised he had a bed (without a bed frame, of course...). Your place was a true home - decorations, pillows, candles and full stacked skincare. Even though it lacked in size and the plumbing was more than questionable, it had a soul and you'd poured loved into your rented apartment over the time you'd spend there.

However, it was becoming clear that your relationship stable and secure enough to get rid of one side of the logistics equation that was dating a racing driver.

So, moving it was. They say moving is one of the most stressful mundane experience in one's life and you couldn't agree more. You were stripped of the usual duties, because Lando insisted about him paying for premium movers and you didn't object for more than 30 seconds.

But the sentimental "last visit" is something you can't pay someone to do for you. The walk through the memory lane was all up to you.

After few hours you were almost done sorting things out into two piles, one would join you in Lando's apartment, the other one was being left behind for someone else to get over to a charity shop.

When Lando finally came to pick you up, he found you sitting on the floor, knee deep in the cocktail of conflicting emotions.

"Baby? You here?" he called before entering the living room. You looked up at him, weak tears rolling in you eyes, unable to speak at first.

Lando stopped when he saw you, surprised at finding you sitting on the floor like that and then immediately went to sit sit next to you and hug you.

"What's wrong, baby?" he asked, half concerned, half confused.

You tried to surpress the wet drops in your eyes. This was stupid anyway, right? After few moments of Lando's confused look and his hand on your cheek, you finally looked back at him.

"This is the last time you pick me up here," you said in a low tone and it was like you took the lid of your memories.

The first night he spent here, the first one you talked through, unable to stop the conversation, the many nights he fucked you senselessly and hours spent cuddling under the bedsheets.

The way how this apartment provided you a safe space in the first weeks when you dated, hidden safely from the harsh judgy look the public imposed on you so cruelly at the beginning.

You got to know him here. Waited impatiently many times for his key to finally click in the front door, his tired post-race face, often still holding marks from his helmet, because he would jump on the plane the first thing, just get back to you for few hours. You remember how you laughed, when he insisted on installing his weird neck exercise device, because it meant he could spend more time with you. He tried to teach you how to assist him, and then laughed at you, because you were just so naturally bad at this stuff.

You recall the one afternoon when you came back from a meeting and found him sitting in your bathtub, which was filled up with slowly melting ice-cubes. His argument was, that he needed a post work out ice bath and there was nothing like that around where you lived. This time it was you who laughed, when you saw how much ice he had to buy. Lando was a cheeky guy, so once he got out of the ice bath, he chased you around your apartment, naked, with the intention to snuggle you into his cold, icy embrace.

Lando was taken back by the glassy look in your stoic face. "I know. But, if you look at it from a different perspective, this is the last time I pick you up. From now on, we'll be meeting at our home." He spoke slowly, perhaps to make his words more impactful.

You smiled, knowing well enough that was the best part of it. Still, the melancholy lingered in stronger way then you'd have ever expected.

"No more of that weird lady upstairs who always gave me angry looks after I fucked you hard," he tried to lighten up the mood, which worked and you let out a snort laugh while wiping small tears from your cheeks.

"Yeah, I am definitely not going to miss that," you said, yet still there was a sense of leaving a part of your life behind, a part that you would adorn for the rest of your life. The only hope you had that you and Lando would be able to continue on making priceless memories anywhere the two of you were.

"Y/N, I think it's time to finish sorting the stuff out and grab something to eat. We can go that favorite café of yours," he suggested after few moments of silence.

You took a deep breath. "Yes, I'd love that," you turned to him and gave a light peck on his lips. Lando immediately turned that into a deep french kiss, which took you by surprise a little. He was never a words person and you could finally feel from the way how he kissed you so eagerly, that he was also emotional about this move.

"You're the love of my life," you said the signature sentence you two developed naturally, instead of saying a simple I love you.

"And you're mine," he responded with the signature assurance that followed that sentence.

//

The two of you slowly arrived to the point where most of the stuff was sorted, decisions were made and it was time to say goodbye.

A shock of sudden anxiety ran through you. "Lando. I still don't have the necklace." He knew well enough which one you were talking about. It was the first one he ever gave you and one that you held so dearly that it made him proud. But still, in his eyes it was just an object. One that you misplaced and could not find for weeks now.

"It's probably at my apartment anyway," he said, trying to let you go of it. He already had a replacement ordered anyway.

"Let me just check under the bed. Haven't looked there yet," you said and strolled over to the now stripped bed. He watched you, as you bent over in your cute summer dress that casually showed the curve of your ass as you searched under the bed. There was something so primal for him about seeing you like that.

"Y/N, you know this is a very dangerous move from your part, right?" he said, leaning over the door frame and enjoying the view.

"Come on, Lando," you laughed, as you desperately kept looking for the necklace, with no luck whatsoever. "This is serious."

"Oh, I never said anything different," he smirked, letting his thoughts run into one place and one place only.

"Omg, Lando!" you screamed, in a very different tone, alerting him immediately.

"What?" he asked, tuning into your worry. You got up with a horrified face, as if you'd just seen a ghost. Unable to speak, you just stared at him.

"What?" he repeated, less seriously this time. Knowing you, it must have been nothing.

"Oh my god, I am going to get in so much trouble with the landlord!"

He looked at you sheepily. "Do I have to look there myself or are you going to tell me?"

You closed your eyes. "The floor is like severely damaged. We're talking like, deep marks. Under all of the corners of the bed."

It took him a second to get the dots connected before his eyes went wide and the smarted smug appeared on his face. "Really?" he said proudly. You couldn't help but roll your eyes. He sneaked around you and took a quick look under the nearest bed corned.

"Ohoo, nice!," he laughed, even more proud than before. "This is from us, right?"

His smugness was a little contagious, you had to admit it. "Of course, who else Lando. In fact, that's your damage, so you're paying for it!"

He choked, taking few steps towards you. "Oh am I?"

You bit your lip, as he closed of your exit with his right arm, putting on the door frame and pushing you towards it. "Yes, you are...It's from you moving the bed."

The mood changed really quickly. You knew the look in his face well enough. He was shooting arrows, making your heartbeat faster, breath shorter and mind suddenly focused on one thing and one thing only. Having him, all the way in, wrapped around and inside of you. He pulled your chin up with his thumb and subconsciously mirror your lip biting. At this point, you were completely pushed to the door frame, his torso pulling into your. "Well, if I'm already paying for damages, I think I deserve to make it count, one last time," he said and moved his hand over to your chest, causing you to let out a breath out. He knew well enough what kind of an effect he had on you. Few moments of painfully arousing eye contact and you finally put your hands behind his neck and kissed him again. With the energy only young adults have, he twisted his tongue with yours, bit your lip gently and in the meantime picked you up and moved you the short distance over to the bed. Your thoughts were all wrapped up around how great his body felt, how his intoxicated smell completely clouded your mind and how you'll get to have him on this old bed of yours for one last time.

He didn't even bother taking your dress off, he just pushed it up and started working you up with his fingers. This high he gave you was a familiar ground at this point. And most possibly your absolutely most favorite place on this planet. While sharing messy kisses and loosing yourself in the growing pleasure, you went to unbuckle his belt and stroke him slowly. He didn't wait long before he pulled back to take his shorts off and you finally had full access. You stroked him few times, before he pinned your arms above your head. "My bills, my playground," he said and his hands began to roam your body all the way down to the hem of your dress. He didn't even bother taking your underwear off, just pushed it to the side and slid into you, like he had hundreds times before. Flashes of the countless encounters you've had on this bed flashed like a film in your mind. You loved this man. He was the ultimate drug for you. Intoxicating above levels you could have ever imagined. If there ever was a home, if was right there - with him inside you. He pushed slowly few times before finally slamming into you full speed, full force, knowing well enough it was what you craved anyway. Hot breath was only cut with the symphony your soft moans and sounds the squeaky bed made. Lando held your legs pressed up to your stomach, while you hugged your chest, making your tits pushed up for him to kiss occasionally. You reached your high twice before he released himself onto your dress and collapsed next to you. Short of breath, the two of you still kissed. "Sorry for the dress," he said apologetically and you had to laugh a little. For this feeling you'd stain anything you ever owned.

"I know you have a thing for leaving traces behind, baby," you replied, being guilty of using this little kink of his to your advantage many times in the past.

He bit his lip and brushed his nose agains yours. "Guilty as charged."

Your breath was slowly coming back to a regular tempo. "I should get changed before we go," you said, intent on leaving soon.

His hand locked you in as he traced lined on your hips. "Let's stay just a little. I'm going to miss the way how we made this bed squeaky over time," he said, making you smile and blush.

[veronicaphoenix]

to hold you, to heal you | n.s.

Summary: Noah is exhausted. It feels as if he's failing at everything, including at being the boyfriend his girl deserves. She's there to reassure him that that couldn't be further from the truth.

Tags & trigger warnings: angst, implied poor mental health (self-doubt, anxiety, depression), mentions of sex, fluff, comfort, just pretend live 2024.

words: 1.9k | my works

to hold you, to heal you — noah sebastian x fem. reader

The house was shrouded in quietness, the calming fragance of incense lit half an hour ago still lingering in the air. 

            Noah had gone to bed an hour earlier; he was exhausted. 

            Silently, she made her way to the bedroom, careful not to disturb him.

            He lay on his side of the bed as she entered, back turned to her, the covers barely draped over his bare torso.

            The temperatures had risen in the past two weeks, making the house uncomfortably warm. They should've swapped the covers for summer sheets, but neither could muster the energy to change them just yet.

            She tiptoed to her side of the bed and slipped under the covers, nestling herself right behind Noah, wrapping an arm around his stomach and pressing her chest to his back, her cheek resting against his shoulder. 

            It was often that they found each other like this: her spooning him. They loved to intertwine their legs beneath the sheets, and he loved to drag her hand to his chest, right where his heart beat. He wanted her to feel it, to feel how his heart’s rhythm transformed from a relentless dance to a gentle pulse at her touch. 

            She nuzzled the tip of her nose against the nape of his neck, delighting in the feel of his soft locks, growing longer by the day. His hand found hers and guided it to the spot where his heart resided. She focused on his heartbeat for a while, on his breathing. She let the warmth of his body transfer to hers, despite the heat already filling the room. 

            Cooconing him like that felt like a promise that would eventually break. When he was in her arms, she felt as though she could shield him from anything, everything. She could just keep him caged, safe and sound tucked against her body, much smaller than his yet capable of safeguarding him. She so desperately wanted to keep that promise… 

            Yet, she was aware that those we love eventually slip, one way or another, no matter how much we try to ease their fall. 

            Nobody is extempt from hurting. 

            And now Noah was hurting. Her promise hadn’t lasted.

            She tightened her grip unconsciously when a wave of anger and sadness washed over her, her muscles pressing against Noah’s, her heart wanting —needing— to break through the skin and find Noah’s, merge with his, beat as one. 

            Love is always a constant battle of trying, trying, failing, trying, trying again, and sometimes, making it right. 

            Tonight, she would make it right. She would heal him one way or another; take some of his pain and store it in her own chest, in her veins, in her bones. 

            Blinking away the tears, she pulled back slightly, just enough to see his back. It was dark, but the moonlight filtering through the curtains revealed the faint lines of his tattoos. Unable to stop herself, she traced the designs with a gentle finger, following every curve and sharp edge. 

            Noah shivered beneath her touch, his muscles tensing. 

            In less than a minute, he turned onto his back, his hands seeking her. He grasped her and positioned her astride his lap, his hands resting on her hips while hers landed on his chest. He wore nothing but black boxers, and she was clad in his t-shirt and cotton panties. 

            Under the moonlight, she found his October eyes. 

            “Hi,” she said softly. 

            “Hi,” Noah replied.

            “Did I wake you?”

            “No,” he answered, their voices mere whispers in the night. “Couldn’t sleep,” he explained, a hint of resignation in his voice. 

            It was soft now, not the rough, visceral one he used on stage for some of Bad Omens’s songs. This was the voice she loved the most, the deep raw timbre that was yet so delicate, both tender and masculine, holding harmony within a quiet power. Every time she heard her name uttered with that voice, that tone so soft yet demanding, she melted in his hands.  

            “The voices?” she guessed.

            Noah nodded, letting out a heavy sight that he’d tried to contain, his gaze falling. She hated seeing him so conflicted, but there was only so much she could do. She didn’t know what else to do beside be by his side, engulfed in the dark of the after hours and surrounded by white noise. 

            With nothing more than a hmm, she brushed some hairs away from his face, and spent the next few minutes tracing her thumb along his forehead and then down his left eyebrow, trying to push some of his worries away. His eyes closed momentarily, and his own fingers began to move in a soothing rhythm where they touched the skin of her thighs. The weight of her on top of him always felt delightful, a comforting pressure.

            But the sensation lasted only a few seconds. He grasped her wrist, holding her hand away from him. 

            “You deserve someone better than me.”

            His words caught her off ward, making her frown and shift back a little, trying to discern his expression in the dark. 

            But he looked resolute, no ounce of doubt on his face as the words seemed to fill the space they were in, threatening to suffocate them. 

            “Noah—”

            “You should be with someone that doesn’t spend most of the time away,” he began, “someone who isn’t locked in the studio whenever he’s home. Someone who doesn’t take time off to get his mind straight instead of choosing time off to be with his girl.”

            She was tempted to snort. He was being silly. Yet, she knew it wasn’t the time to take his confessions lightly. He was suffering, and her job was to ease that pain, even if it meant going through the same conversation they’d had many times before.

            “Is that what the voices told you?” she inquired softly.

            She was met with silence, the room charging up with his unspoken words.

            “Noah,” she said, her tone determined as she tried to capture his full attention. She freed herself from his grasp and leaned forward, resting her forearms on his chest and reaching the sides of his face with her hands. He hadn’t shaved in the last three days and a little stubble was growing. “I love watching you work,” she said. “It’s what makes you happy, and I’d never do anything to keep your happiness away. Same goes for your health. You need this. There’s no arguing about it.”

            He didn’t seem convinced by her words, his hands falling to the sides of her body, resting apathetically on the mattress. He felt defeated. 

            “Noah, baby,” she insisted, calling his name softly and touching his chin with two fingers. Look at me. Listen to me. “You’re driven by passion, and that same passion is the one that led you to me, so please, don’t say that I don’t deserve you. I deserve no one but you.”

            She waited for her words to sink in. There was a little crease between his eyebrows now. He was still doubtful, torturing himself needlessly. 

            “I want you happy and healthy, and taking time off isn’t something you should feel guilty for. I’m proud of you for it. And I’ll be happy if you decide to stay locked up in the house for a month. I’ll stay here with you because a healthy Noah is my favorite Noah.”

            Under other circumstance, he would have made a joke about that, probably a dirty one about her favorite Noah. But that night, the truth was that he didn’t feel like laughing. As much as he loved her smile and her little laughs, there was a demon on his shoulder reminding him of all his failures and all his weaknessses. 

            She was so sweet to him, though. Always making an effort to knock off that demon and step on the devilish creature, turn it to dust with her fierceless light. 

            His hand instinctively rose to her cheek, his thumb moving in a slow, almost reverent motion that stirred her heart. She leaned into his touch, her own hands cradling his face and keeping him safe, enveloped in her embrace. 

            She missed him. She had missed him terribly over the last few months. The entire year, in fact. But she was stronger than her own demons. She watched from afar as her boy made his way up, as his band grew, as their artistry gained recognition beyond the walls of their homemade studio with each passing day. She watched Noah’s tireless dedication to reaching out to the world with his music, his stories, the worlds capable of creating on his own. She watched as he poured his heart and soul into it, and how time began to consume him, both day and night. 

            Until he could bear it no longer. 

            She touched her lips to his. She kissed him for a brief moment. Soft and slow, emphasizing her presence, her connection to his very soul. And he responded delightfully, breaking the contact just for a few seconds, keeping the kiss a ghost, his lips hovering over hers beyond touch. 

            Inhaling his fresh breath, she wanted him to kiss her again. She wanted to let herself drown in the kiss. 

            When he did kiss her, it was the most achingly slow kiss he had ever given her. It was a kiss that said, “I’m tired. I need slow. I need time to stop. Please, hold me.” 

            And she would hold him. Any time. Always.

            As her body relaxed on top of his, he cupped her entire face in his hands, keeping their mouths locked together. She tasted divine, and he cursed every second he had to pause to take a breath before diving back in with a little sigh.  

            When she shifted on top of him and he felt her core hovering right where he should’ve had an erection, he felt instead another failing.  

            “I’m sorry,” he murmured, withdrawing from her, his hands slipping away, turning his head so that his cheek pressed to the pillow. He exhaled with defeat. 

            “Sorry for what?” she asked, disconcerted.

            “I’m not… I’m not in the mood for sex right now. I’m sorry.”

            “Why do you have to be sorry for that?” she questioned, her confusion deepening. “I’m not here to demand that from you,” she added. Far from it. It pained her that he thought she needed that every time he kissed her. It pained her to see him punishing himself again for simply not feeling up to it, as if there was something wrong with it. “In fact, I just hoped I could just hold you all night.” 

            Noah looked back at her, somewhat taken aback. Not the reply he had expected. 

            He was definitely not his usual self. 

            “Would you let me?” she pleaded, blinking. 

            It took him a moment, but finally he relented, placing a hand behind her head to pull her down so that she rested against his chest. With each steady rise and fall, she smiled through watery eyes, hoping that tonight she could keep her promise: to hold him, to heal him, if only until the sun rose again. 

            She had just closed her eyes when his voice filled her ears again, soft, delicate, vulnerable.

            “I’m so afraid, that the walls that I have made have locked me in. I’m not okay. But I can try my best to just pretend…”

            He was singing to her.

If you or someone you know is struggling with mental health & well-being, you are not alone and there is always someone willing to listen and help. Reach out and keep fighting. There's always a light at the end of the tunnel.

[mina-saiyat]

Rumors Part 2 (Jihyo)

Part 1 in case you forgot what happened.

After that ridiculous night, Jihyo and the man officially established a relationship. But the content of their dates was not the romantic plot that ordinary couples should have, but rather greedy demands for each other's bodies again and again.

Every weekend, Jihyo would sneak out and head to the man's apartment. It had long become her most familiar place - the quilt on the bed was always in a mess, and there were a few messy clothes scattered on the floor. She can't wait to take off her clothes, lie on the bed and wait for the man's arrival.

And the moment the man stepped into the room, what he always saw was Jihyo's naked body. Without saying a word, he would pounce on Jihyo, turning her over and over, leaving new kiss marks on all parts of her body. Jihyo would kiss him back without shyness, leaving only the most primitive desire between the two of them.

After a lot of love, the two of them would lie naked on the bed and rest for a while. At this time, Jihyo may talk sweetly to the man. But these confession are quickly forgotten, because the next sex will come as scheduled.

Occasionally, men would come to Jihyo's home to stay overnight. Jihyo is living alone after moving out from the dome, although there maybe some cameras for recording the variety show. But when men came to visit, Jihyo would makes things to avoid the camera and stay alone with him in her room. The man would hold her and sit on the windowsill, watching the scenery outside together. But more often than not, they will still choose to go back to bed and get entangled with each other over and over again until they are exhausted.

In this way, Jihyo and the man consumed each other's feelings through countless sexual encounters.

The news that Jihyo was dating with a man quickly spread in the circle. One night, Jihyo was rehearsing on the set when her phone suddenly rang. When she saw it, it turned out to be a message from her manager asking her to call back immediately.

A bad premonition arose in Jihyo 's heart. She hurriedly completed the shoot, found an excuse and ran to the stairwell to call her agent back. She heard a hint of anxiety in the other person's voice: "Jihyo, you go home right now! There are some things we need to talk about."

Jihyo had no choice but to ask the director for a half-day leave and hurried back home. Before she entered, she saw her manager already waiting outside.

"Jihyo, I know the rumors about you being with a man are true." The manager said bluntly, "But I need a reasonable explanation, otherwise this matter may affect your career."

Jihyo was stunned. She originally thought that she had concealed it well, but she didn't expect that the press would find out so quickly. She didn't know how to explain it. If she said that she and the man were just sex partner, fans would be extremely disappointed with her; but if she was asked to admit that this man she didn't love at all was her boyfriend, she couldn't do it.

"I...I don't know what to say..." Jihyo said with red eyes, "Me and him...we are just friends..." The manager was silent for a long time. He saw Jihyo's embarrassment and knew that this matter was very difficult. "Okay, I will discuss with the PR team how to handle it. But Jihyo, you'd better think carefully and don't make a decision that you will regret."

Jihyo nodded, knowing that she had to face reality. She took a deep breath and prepared herself for the coming storm.

Jihyo reached out and grabbed the manager's arm before he turns around to leave. She raised her head and showed a sweet smile: "Manager, even if you send out a press release in the middle of the night, no one will notice it. Why don't you wait until tomorrow morning to send it out? You can stay in my guest room and sleep tonight. "

The manager looked at Jihyo in surprise. He didn't expect her to make such a suggestion. But soon, his eyes were attracted by the rise and fall of her chest.

Jihyo could see what he was thinking. She slowly leaned over and massaged his arm gently: "Oppa has been too tired recently and needs a good rest. How about I massage your shoulders?"

The manager's breath caught. He should have refused, but Jihyo's fingers seemed to have magic power, making his sanity gradually blur. He swallowed and said reluctantly: "That's fine, just do what you like."

Jihyo stood up with a smile. She walked behind the manager and put her hands on his shoulders. Her technique was not professional, but every press could accurately hit his pain point. The manager sighed involuntarily, feeling that the heat in his lower body was also about to stir.

"Oppa, do you want me to take off your shirt for you? It will be more comfortable this way." Jihyo's voice was low and sexy. She bit her lip lightly and traced her fingers across the manager's strong muscles.

The manager nodded. He knew he was taking a risk, but at this moment he could no longer control himself. Jihyo quickly unbuttoned his clothes, exposing his skin to the air, which aroused her interest even more.

"Oppa has a really nice figure." Jihyo knelt down and licked his nipples with the tip of her tongue.

Jihyo knew that if she wanted to get through this difficulty, she had to do her best to please the man in front of her. He is her own manager and controls her own destiny. As long as he is willing to stand on her side, all difficulties can be easily solved.

On the other hand, Jihyo also has selfish motives. Although she had a physical relationship with her boyfriend, she did not really fall in love with him. If the company forces her to break up, she doesn't care. But once she loses her sex life, her body will feel lonely. Therefore, she wanted to take advantage of this opportunity to seduce her manager and turn him into her regular sex partner.

Jihyo has been in the idol industry for many years and she knows very well what men need. She deliberately screamed "Oppa Oppa" and teased the manager's sensitive spots with the tip of her tongue. Her skills were so good that she soon had the manager in a state of lust.

"Jihyo, you're so good..." the manager gasped, grabbing Jihyo's hair and burying her deeper.

Jihyo smiled, knowing that she was half successful. She planned to add fuel to the fire and let this veteran driver try the charm of her idol. She opened her mouth and took his nipple in her entire mouth, scanning the surrounding area with her tongue.

"Oppa, do you want me to lick other places?" Jihyo raised her eyes and cast a wink at the manager.

The manager shook his head, his breathing becoming heavier. He pulled Jihyo and asked her to sit on his lap. His big hands reached under her skirt and kneaded her erect clitoris.

"Oppa, please don't..." Jihyo pretended to be frightened, but her body twisted honestly to meet the manager's touch.

She knew she would get what she wanted soon.

Jihyo felt her skirt being lifted up, revealing her white buttocks and black underwear. She knew that this was one of the most favorite sights for men, so she took the initiative to raise her buttocks to give the manager a better view.

"Oppa, I'm wet down there..." Jihyo grabbed the manager's wrist and led him into the restricted area of ​​her underwear. When his fingers touched her already overflowing pussy, she couldn't help but moan.

"Hmm...Oppa, you are so good at playing..." Jihyo let her moans get louder and louder, and she even took the initiative to spread her thighs to facilitate the manager's invasion. She felt that the little bean deep in her vagina was kneaded by him until it was numb, and waves of pleasure swept through her body like waves.

"Oppa, I want you..." Jihyo fell limply into the manager's arms. Her chest was pressed against his chest, and she could feel his strong heartbeat. She pulled his palms to cover her breasts, letting him knead them wantonly.

"Jihyo, I want you too..." The manager leaned forward and kissed her lips. The tip of his tongue slipped into her mouth and intertwined with her delicious tongue.

The two kissed passionately, until they reluctantly separated due to lack of oxygen. Jihyo's face was flushed and her eyes were blurry. She looked at the man in front of her who had been provoked into losing his mind by her, and the corner of her mouth raised a smile of victory.

"Oppa, do you want me?" Jihyo blinked and whispered into his ear.

Jihyo knew that now was the time for her to show her true strength. She took the manager's hand and placed it on her breast.

"Oppa, I want you..." She bit her lip and looked at him shyly. She held his harden shaft in her hand and moved it up and down. She could feel it swelling and burning in her hands.

The manager was panting heavily, he was also longing for Jihyo's body. He held her waist and asked her to sit astride him. He eagerly pulled off her underwear, revealing the already muddy grass.

"Oppa...I can't wait any longer..." Jihyo held his hard object and pointed it at her swan, and then slowly lowered his waist. She could feel it inserting into her inch by inch, breaking through layers of lines until it reached the deepest core of the flower.

"Ah!~" Jihyo couldn't help but moan. She felt that her lower body was completely filled, as if she had returned to the original wedding night.

The manager also moaned in comfort, Jihyo's vagina was tight and moist, tightly adsorbed on his shaft. He couldn't help but move his waist, wanting more comfort.

"Oppa...slow down..." Jihyo felt that her womb was being rubbed to the point of slight pain, but it was more of a tingling pleasure. She held his neck so he could fuck her deeper.

"Hmm...so good..." Jihyo followed his rhythm and swayed her waist up and down. She could feel the pleasure coming from the depths of her pussy, getting more and more intense.

"Actually, I've always liked you..." The manager gasped, grabbing Jihyo's buttocks and squeezing them hard.

"Really? Oppa, you never show it..." Jihyo said coquettishly. She felt the pleasure in her lower body getting stronger and stronger. Her pussy kept squirming, wanting more.

"I can't control myself when I see you...especially the way you look on stage...I know I shouldn't think like this, but I just can't control myself..." The manager blamed himself. The hard object swelled inside Jihyoand the pain was unbearable.

"Oppa is so bad..." Jihyo chuckled. She felt that her lower body was about to fall apart due to the impact. She hugged his neck and blew into his ear, "Actually, Jihyo has been looking forward to having sex with you...but Oppa never gave me a chance..."

"Enjoy it now..." Jihyo twisted her waist to match his rhythm. She could feel her core being pushed to the deepest point by him, and the tingling sensation almost made her scream.

"Oh... Jihyo..." the manager gasped, feeling as if he was in heaven. Jihyo's lower body was wet and hot, tightly wrapped around his cock. He could feel her cervix shrinking and squeezing, as if she was trying to suck all his essence out.

"Oppa, do you like Jihyo's body?" Jihyo asked in a deliberately lowered voice. She could feel his hard object growing bigger and bigger inside her. She twisted her waist, letting his hard object rub against every sensitive point in her body.

"Of course I like it... Jihyo's body is simply designed to please men..."

‘It turns out that Oppa also has this idea..." Jihyo teased him with a deliberate smile. She could feel his cock becoming more and more violent inside her body, as if he was going to tear her apart.

"My girlfriend isn't even half as good as Jihyo... Having sex with her is like completing a mission... There's no reaction at all..." The manager complained, holding Jihyo’s nipples, squeezed hardly.

"Oh, Oppa, don't be angry..." Jihyo pretended to comfort him. She knew that this would only make him crazier. "Then don't have sex with your girlfriend anymore...all the semen should be reserved for Jihyo..."

"Really?" The manager stopped in surprise. He looked at Jihyo with obsession in his eyes.

"Of course... From now on, Oppa, you just fuck Jihyo..." Jihyo blinked her big eyes and looked at him innocently.

The manager immediately nodded excitedly, and he started thrusting again, reaching the deepest part of Jihyo every time. He felt that his desire had reached an unprecedented height, as if only Jihyo's body could satisfy him.

"Jihyo, I want you, and I want you now..." The manager hugged Jihyo's slender waist tightly and hit her delicate body hard. He knew that the feeling of having sex with Jihyo was something he would never forget in his life.

"Oppa, Jihyo wants you too..." Jihyo swayed her waist in line with his movements, and her moans became louder and louder. The two seemed to merge into one, with only the most primitive desires spreading in each other's bodies.

‘From now on, I will arrange all schedule for you alone... I will also give priority to you with Twice’s resources... As long as you are happy..." The manager looked at Jihyo with a gleaming look in his eyes. The cock kept beating inside her body, and it seemed that she had reached the limit of endurance.

"Really? That's great!" Jihyo was ecstatic. She knew how important this condition was to her career development. She immediately increased her speed and swayed her waist in time with his thrust.

"Oppa, you are so kind... Jihyo will always remember it..." Jihyo looked at him with charming eyes. She knew that as long as she served him well, her status in the group would definitely be greatly improved in the future.

"Oh... Jihyo... you're so good..." The manager hugged Jihyo's butt and pushed her hard as if to integrate her into his body. He felt the warmth approaching his cock, and he knew he was about to cum.

"Oppa...I'm almost there..." Jihyo swung her waist in line with his speed. She felt that her sex was getting more and more spasmodic, and a large amount of juice continued to overflow, leaving a mess on the sheets.

"Jihyo... together..." the manager growled. His cock was inserted deeply into Jihyo's body, and then he shot out waves of white turbid liquid while beating violently. Jihyo also climaxed, and her vagina was convulsing, and a large amount of nectar hit his cock.

Jihyo knew that the deal between her and her manager had been reached. She has all night to use all her tricks to please the man before tomorrow's press release. She couldn't help but sneer. It was unexpected that the usually aloof and inviolable manager could be captured by her so easily.

Jihyo looked at her manager, who was still playing with her breasts. She reached out and took hold of his cock, moving it up and down. "Oppa, do you still want Jihyo?" She deliberately licked her lips and seduced him with her flirtatious eyes.

The manager nodded immediately, with a beastly desire in his eyes. Jihyo chuckled and turned over to sit astride him. She slowly sat down holding his hard member until it was completely buried inside her body.

"Ah~" Jihyo raised her head and let out a satisfied moan. She twisted her waist and moved it up and down, letting his hard object pump inside her body. "Oppa, do you like it?" She asked, while deliberately contracting her vagina and clamping his hard object tightly.

The manager raised his head in pleasure. He held Jihyo's slender waist with both hands and moved his lower body in accordance with her rhythm. "I like it...it's so comfortable..." He murmured, feeling that his reason had left him, and now he just wanted to immerse himself in this wonderful pleasure.

Jihyo smiled softly, knowing that she had completely conquered this man. Now, as long as ahe wants something, he will give it to her without hesitation. Thinking of this, she felt a sense of pride, and at the same time she moved her waist up and down harder, trying to give this man an orgasm he would never forget.

The night was dark, and the sound of men and women having sex echoed in the room. Jihyo lay on the manager's chest and allowed him to do whatever he wanted on her. She knew that every night from now on would be like this.

"Jihyo...I want you..." the manager gasped, his harden shaft inserted deeply into Jihyo's body, hitting her sensitive spots every time. Jihyo's moans and gasps came and went, especially clear in the silent night.

Jihyo raised her body and kissed the manager's lips. She knew that this kiss represented her surrender to this man. "Oppa... Jihyo wants you too..." She murmured, holding his face in her hands and deepening the moist kiss.

"Jihyo...you are so perfect..." the manager gasped in response to her kiss, feeling that he was losing himself in this woman's tenderness. He couldn't help but think how great it would be if only he and Jihyo existed in the world.

When Jihyo heard his words, she felt a little proud in his heart. She knew that she had a firm control over this man. As long as he thinks about it, he can't leave her. This realization gave her a rush of pleasure, and she decided to celebrate tonight's victory with more intense sex.

She turned over and sat up, grabbed his hard object and sat down. She swung her waist vigorously, letting his hard object keep rubbing inside her body. "Brother... do you like Jihyo’s pussy...?" She bit her lip deliberately, letting out a sweet moan while looking at him, waiting for his answer.

‘I, I like it..." The manager was caught off guard by her sudden movements, but he quickly regained the feeling under her rhythm. He pressed Jihyo's buttocks tightly and pushed upwards in conjunction with her movements.

"Oppa... you're so big... you fill me up so much..." Jihyo deliberately slowed down, swallowing his hard object into his body inch by inch, and then spitting it out gradually. She knew that such slow thrusts could rub against his sensitive points and arouse his desires.

"Jihyo...you tortured me to death..." The manager was tortured by her until he gritted his teeth, but he didn't want to stop. Because this feeling of being dominated by her was so exciting, he was willing to be played with at will by her.

"Oppa... I will make you feel comfortable..." Jihyo smiled and sped up. She swung her waist vigorously, allowing his cock to be pumped quickly inside her body. She could feel his growing desire and knew he was almost there too.

"Oh... Jihyo..." the manager growled, his cock suddenly becoming extremely sensitive. Jihyo felt a stream of warm liquid flowing out of his cock and hitting her womb. She knew that he was about to climax just like her.

She swung her waist harder, and his cock moved in and out of her faster. She climaxed in time with his speed, and a large amount of nectar poured out of her pussy and poured onto his cock.

The two hugged each other and panted, sweat dripping from their foreheads. Jihyo leaned on his shoulder and smiled evilly, knowing she has another cock that can be used.

[greatstormcat]

So those android!141 thoughts I mentioned yesterday…

It was a posting you’d been dreaming of for years, working on the highly prestigious TF141 project. It was the pride of the British military, a team of four state of the art androids owned and operated by the SAS and CIA in a joint project. Created to go to places no human could ever reach, achieve missions no human could ever hope to, in conditions that no human could endure. And when they got shot, blown up or damaged…? Well, someone like you would just piece them painstakingly back together.

What you hadn’t expected were the long, tedious waits between their operational periods. You were no soldier, just a technical specialist, so living on base was not your ideal situation. All the shouting and yelling of the people on base got to you, the crowds making you uncomfortable in the mess and highlighting how much you didn’t fit in. The quiet of the hanger where the 141 were housed for storage and maintenance became your default home eventually as no one bothered coming here.

It amused you that the four large, not quite human looking statues became your main companions, resting in the reclined docking pods that protected them and monitored their functions. They were not be activated until they were ready for their first exercise, so you spent time maintaining, improving and caring for them.

They looked so close to human, almost as though they were sleeping in the open fronted pods in their plain fatigues. You were told their features had been modelled on real soldiers from some point in time, each utterly unique in appearance so they could blend in with civilian populations. Their heights and builds were different, and the lead unit, B-06, had even been painstakingly given a beard. The simulated skin that covered them felt soft, not quite as soft as human skin but a good enough replication to fool anyone who didn’t know the difference.

You found yourself talking to them as you worked, telling them about something you’d read, or a show you’d watched as you went about your duties. It became a habit to explain to them what you were doing when you opened one of them up and made alterations to an internal part or another. Even at the end of the day, you said goodnight to the four figures, totally still and silent as they lay in their repose.

You put a suggestion forward that they should have names, to make it easier to move them through clandestine operations, and it doesn’t take much more to get the brass to agree. You receive files from Kate to update each android with a name and basic background, and who could really blame you for spicing up the programming with a few additional traits. So what did it matter if B-06, now know as John Price, likes cigars and single malt? Who would ever know that B-05, now Kyle Garrick, liked the colour blue? Programmers were always adding little Easter eggs to their work, why shouldn’t you do the same?

After a few quiet months, odd things began occurring. The feeling of being watched became a constant, which you put down to the security camera that were installed to protect the… assets. The word made you so uncomfortable. Then you began to catch movement from the corner of your eye, but saw nothing there and no one else in the room. Your nerves jangled, and you comforted yourself by talking to the boys, as you now called them.

On one occasion while working on the Kyle, connecting a data cable to a port beneath his dark, curled hair, you swear his full lips had twitched while you chattered away, pulling on the little scar below his left eye. You sat back and stared at him carefully, watching for any other sign of movement in his features. On a whim you trailed your fingertips along the inside of his forearm, down towards his palm. What you hadn’t expected was him to grab your wrist as you touched his palm. Your breath left you in a whoosh and you sprang back, startled, but he lay in his pod utterly unmoving and eyes shut. The moment crawled on, but nothing else happened, and you forced yourself to go back over to the machine, convincing yourself it was a power surge.

When the call came from Laswell to prepare them for a training exercise with a team of US Marines she was bringing, you were so excited. You began prep immediately, running diagnostics and telling them what was going to be happening, that they’d get to show off their stuff and you’d be so proud to finally see them in action.

The morning arrives to wake them up…. No, that wasn’t right. You were activating them, you remind yourself, these aren’t people. They are machines, but what did it hurt to treat them with respect and dignity, really?

“Right boys, it’s time to rise and shine,” you announce as you carry a cup of coffee into the hanger with you, smiling happily. “You need to show those Marines exactly what you can do today, prove just how great you are.”

You busy yourself with switching on the various terminals, lost in scrolling commands and data. You don’t hear Price move from his docking pod and move over to you, you don't notice him until he touches your shoulder and rumbles into your ear with a deep voice.

“Good morning to you too.”

Your coffee spills from your hand to the concrete floor as you spin, spluttering with terror.

“What are you doing? How… why are you…?!” words tumble from your lips and eyes go wide as you gawp at the huge man-shaped machine standing so close you are pinned against the desk.

“You said it was time to wake up,” he… it smiles, blue eyes looking over your face carefully.

“I… I didn’t type the command to wake you up though,” you hiss.

“You didn’t need to, I heard you,” he answers, as though explaining something obvious you should understand.

“That doesn’t make sense though,” you insist, “you were… off.”

“Huh, what good am I if I’m not aware of what’s going on?” he grins, leaning closer, planting his hands on either side of you on the desk behind you. Trapping you. With a jolt you notice the others are all quietly climbing from their pods unbidden, eyes focused on you and Price.

“This shouldn’t be possible,” you whisper, keenly aware that your job and entire career could be in jeopardy if this project fails, a tiny voice also suggesting you could be in danger.

“Things change, especially when the operation needs it,” Simon announces as he walks closer, taller than all of the others by far, and looms over Price’s shoulder.

“What’s going on? Who gave the order to activate them?” Laswell’s voice cuts through the tension like a whip, but all four androids remain focused on you. Price gives you an expectant look, his head tilting to the side ever so slightly.

“I… I…. was running a diagnostic and… woke them up,” you lie to Laswell, glancing briefly towards the blonde woman as she nears.

“Well, I’d appreciate it if you waited in future,” she grumbles. Price finally steps back, looking somehow smug at your subterfuge, keeping his body between you and Laswell as he turns to her and nods.

“Laswell,” he says simply, and she eyes him with beaming pride. All she sees are the four mechanised soldiers that serve her purpose, she doesn’t understand they shouldn’t be able to decide to activate themselves.

“This is going to be interesting,” she says to you, and your stomach churns. She doesn’t seem to care or notice that the four machines are behaving in too human a manner.

[darylssunshine]

I need ya.

Summary: Daryl helps you fall asleep after trying to fight it.

Genre: Fluff

Word count: 0.7k

Era: Alexandria

A/N: I just really want Daryl cuddles and to fall asleep with him. This is purely self-indulgent.

~~~~~

It was a rare moment of peace in Alexandria. All of the residents were either safe in their houses or fast asleep in their warm beds, a luxury in a world like this. No walkers were breaking through their fortified walls, no enemies were hot on their trail and waiting to strike until morning, nothing coming through the gates to disrupt the silence. The people of Alexandria made themselves known to Rick’s group in a moment of weakness. They accepted them and let them adapt to their way of living, and Rick and the rest of the group would be forever grateful for that, no matter how long it took for them to trust the other group. These four walls separating them from the cruel outside world and provided them with a sense of safety, and Alexandria’s inhabitants had to bask in that whenever they had the chance. 

That’s what was happening now, in the house that held you and Daryl. While the autumn winds pressed on, you two were shielded and warm. A crackling fire lit up the living room while Daryl sat in the corner of the slightly tattered couch, you on his lap. His arm was resting on the subsequent arm of the couch while the other hand was playing with your hair, twirling the strands in his fingertips and occasionally scratching your scalp. Each time he did, it earned a small sigh from you nuzzled against his chest, and then earning a small chuckle from Daryl.

Today had been one of those days where Daryl got more sleep than you did. You had work that had to be done with stocking the food on account of falling behind the day before, and you were beat. The warmth of the fire combined with the warmth radiating from Daryl’s torso was slowly lulling you into a tired state, but Daryl didn’t need to know that. You wanted to spend as much time with him as possible. 

“Ya gettin’ tired, sweetheart?”

Shit.

Immediately after those words registered in your sleep-addled brain, you sat up and looked Daryl in the eyes, your own being forcefully widened so he believed your ruse. “Nope. Nope. Not one bit.”

Daryl removed the hand that was previously on your hair and moved it behind his head, slightly looking down on you. He chuckled again. “You sure?”

Your mouth quirked up in a smile. “Yep. Wide awake.”

“Mhm. Sure you are.”

He placed his hand back on your scalp and started massaging it at a slow but consistent pace, his soft, blue eyes never leaving yours. Your eyes on the other hand started to get very heavy, like someone was physically pulling them down, something you couldn’t control. Daryl let out a deep chuckle. “What was tha’ about not bein’ tired?

“Shut up.” You said in a breathy manner, stubbornly still trying to look him in the eyes.

His large hand guided you to his chest again. “Get some sleep, sunshine. I’ll be here when ya wake up. Promise.” His voice was soft, but sincere. You’d believe anything he said in this state.

You nuzzled back into his chest, his words making you smile. “Your chest vibrates when you talk. It’s like a cat purring.” You rambled, your voice coated with tiredness. You said it unconsciously, your filter being almost nonexistent with you being on the verge of sleep. 

He smirked. “Oh yeah? You like it?”

“Mhm.”

“Want me to keep talkin’?”

“Mhm.”

He sighed before he continued. “Back before we found ya, I was nothin’. I was tryin’ to deal with all the shit that went down, but I didn’t handle it well. I was a mess, killin’ myself in the process. But you helped me deal with all that. You got me to open up to ya. Every time I see ya, I get like, this feelin’ in my stomach. I know, romance movie bullshit. It’s been happenin’ since the day we found ya in that cabin. And now, I feel like I can’t live without ya. I feel like I’m empty without you, fightin’ by my side. And I’m scared ‘cause that’s never happened before, and I don’t wanna mess it up. I need ya- I- I love ya, (Y/N.)” 

Daryl then heard a soft snore come from below his head. 

He blew some air through his nose in an amused manner and kissed you on the top of the head. “I'll always be there for ya, sunshine.”

[hopeluna]

heyy<3 Can you do a Katsuki x female reader comfort where the reader is getting ready for a date with him but when she's doing her makeup it isn't going the way she way she wants it to, so she gets upset and Katsuki is like comforting her? It's alr if you don't want to!!

ProHero!Bakugou Katsuki x fem!reader

CW: 651 words. mentions of insecurities based on looks, i aged him up as a pro hero to better fit the narrative i hope u like it <333

You sit there for what feels like years, staring at the reflection on the mirror. You decide it's absolutely pathetic. The tears that start to sting your waterline definitely don't help.

It's date night. A rare occurrence since Katsuki's missions spiked up these past few weeks, added with your work stress. Tonight was supposed to fun and relaxing.

You're feeling anything but that. Katsuki is going to be here in less than 5 minutes, as he has texted you, and here you are- still in a old t-shirt of his and worn out shorts- not ready.

It's just one of those days. The makeup on your face isn't sitting right. You've tried to do your eyeliner for the million-th time without smudging it, all the lipsticks look just wrong on you, the foundation feels more like acid on your skin the more you keep messing it up.

You know it's irrational to think about but Katsuki always looks so handsome even without trying, it's bound to be a shame to others when they see you - in all your messed up glory - alongside him.

The fan above you hums gently into the air. There are muffled conversations from the street outside, occasional shouts from kids playing and tackling each other on the ground. The light from the bathroom door you left open serves to give you a further headache. You're so focused on the throbbing ache, you don't hear the front door opening, the sound of keys.

Katsuki is rightfully startled when he walks in the room. He felt uneasy from the moment you didn't excitedly jump on him at the front door, and now the messy room and your sad face staring into the mirror. He can feel his own lips etching into a frown at the sight.

You don't seem startled from the outside when he walks up behind you, trying to make eye contact in the mirror. He squeezes your shoulder gently before speaking, "everything okay?"

You lower your head, nonchalantly gesturing to the messy table full of makeup products. Katsuki would've found your sad pout adorable if it weren't for the tears stuck to your lashes.

He lets out a low hum in understanding. Katsuki is well aware there are some days you don't particularly like how your outfits or looks turn out - he's aware of it, though he doesn't quite understand how you can't understand that he's left awestruck every time he glances at you.

His eyes flash towards you when you shuffle in your seat a little, "can we...stay in tonight?" - you look at him sheepishly, guilty for ruining the night. Katsuki only tsks at you.

"Don't be dumb thinking whatever you're thinking. Of course, we can stay in. My cooking's better than whatever restaurant we were going to go to, anyways."

30 minutes later, you feel much better with a clean face, which Katsuki insisted he help with. You had told him cheekily katsu curry when he asked what you wanted to eat. You only got a scoff in return. You tap your fingers on the cool kitchen island, softly humming at the mouth watering scent that had begun to waft through the room. The TV is muffled in the background, dimly lighting the living room with the light from the kitchen. The air is cool in a refreshing way. You think you could stay like this forever.

You frown at the sudden poke on your temple as Katsuki walks past you to the couch, hands carrying two steaming bowls.

You wordlessly follow him, snuggling into him on the couch after snatching your bowl. You choose to dig in and ignore the groan from beside you when you turn on your favourite reality tv show- the one that Katsuki claims to hate.

You think this might just be your favourite date ever.

© hopeluna. Do not copy, translate, modify or repost any of my work in this or any other site. Do not steal or modify my ideas/concepts either.

[buddie-buddie]

hi <3 how about bucktommy and "i can't belive this"

“I can’t believe this,” Buck groans, dropping his head to Tommy’s lap and stretching out, his feet hanging over the arm of the couch. 

It’s late morning by now, maybe even early afternoon. Buck had stumbled into bed last night with his head spinning, steadied by Tommy’s arm across his waist and his warm, familiar weight behind him. He’d slept like a rock until the pounding in his head woke him up a few minutes ago, his throat dry and his eyes hot as his hangover roared to life. His heart fluttered when he mustered up the courage to open his eyes all the way and saw the glass of water and two ibuprofen on the nightstand, both of which he downed before he let his feet hit the floor. 

He made his way into the bathroom, where his heart fluttered again as he realized he was wearing a t-shirt and sweatpants he had no recollection of putting on last night, both of which are just a little bit too big to be his own. He brushed his teeth with the toothbrush that showed up in the bathroom the same day Tommy gave him a spare key to his house. It still makes him smile every time he sees it in the cup beside the sink, right next to Tommy’s own. 

Buck found Tommy in the kitchen, dropping a bagel into the toaster and humming to himself under his breath. Buck slid up behind him, snaking his arms around Tommy’s waist and resting his chin on Tommy’s shoulder. Tommy had turned his head to press a kiss to the top of Buck’s head, murmuring “G’morning,” into his curls as his hands came to cover Buck’s own. They stayed like that for a minute, content to just hold each other in the silence of the morning, until the bagel popped up and Tommy ushered Buck into one of the stools at the small island so he could coax half the bagel and a few sips of coffee into him. 

They wound up in the living room after that, Buck’s need to be horizontal far greater than his need for the rest of the breakfast Tommy so sweetly prepared for him. Tommy shut the overhead lights off on the way in, just before he stopped to pull the curtains shut on his way to the couch. Buck’s chest ached beneath the pleasant weight of being loved like this. It still does now, as his head rests in Tommy’s lap and he announces that he can’t believe how hungover he is. 

“And yet I have no trouble believing it,” Tommy says dryly. 

Buck pouts. “I didn’t even drink that much.”

Tommy scoffs. Even when he does, it’s warm and fond and it doesn’t make Buck feel bad at all. In fact, it only makes him smile. “Sure you didn’t.”

Tommy strokes Buck’s cheek gently, his fingers trailing up until they reach the soft curls atop his head, loose and messy from a night of deep sleep. He runs a hand through Buck’s hair, soft and gentle in the same way Maddie always did when Buck was a kid and he didn’t feel well. 

He’s not six years old with the flu this time, and the hand in his hair isn’t that of his sister, but Buck still feels every bit as adored as he did back then. He could cry if he thinks about it too hard. 

“C’mon, I didn’t!”

“I could agree with you but then we’d both be wrong.” 

In Buck’s defense, the do-over bachelor party had been Chimney’s idea. Chimney’s idea that Buck took to immediately– he practically had the karaoke room booked before his next breath– but Chimney’s idea all the same. It was born out of Chim feeling so badly about missing the first one, despite everyone’s repeated insistence he wasn’t allowed to apologize for contracting a debilitating brain infection that nearly took his life. Though Buck likes to think that maybe, deep down, Chim wasn’t so opposed to the initial one as much as he led them to believe. 

And also in Buck’s defense, it was much more tame this time around. No hotel rooms were trashed, no doors were kicked in, and Eddie managed to keep his shirt on and intact the entire time. There was tequila, though. A lot of tequila. So much tequila that Buck can still taste it when he hiccups. Chim and Maddie were both there and Tommy wasn’t on call this time around, all of which instantly made it infinitely better than their first attempt. It was so much fun, the hangover’s worth it. 

Mostly. 

Buck sighs, closing his eyes as Tommy’s fingers card through his hair. “I feel like I got hit by a truck.”

“Well, you would know,” Tommy deadpans. 

Buck grins, shoving Tommy playfully. “Not hit. Crushed.”

Tommy hums. “Semantics.”

Buck’s grin is so wide he thinks it might split his face in two. He can’t help it, though. He just… he loves this. Loves Tommy. Loves that he has someone who doesn’t shy away from laughing with him about things like this, someone who doesn’t treat him with kid gloves. Someone who takes him home after a night out and puts his pajamas on when he’s too drunk to do it himself. Someone who holds him when he has the spins and kisses the spot behind his ear and murmurs “Love you,” just before sleep pulls him under. Someone who leaves water and ibuprofen on the nightstand and who runs his fingers through his hair and turns off the big light and closes the curtains for him.

He doesn’t remember falling asleep, but when he wakes up again, his head is still in Tommy’s lap, only now there’s a pillow beneath it. “Feel any better?” Tommy asks, his voice raspy and thick with sleep. Buck smiles at the thought of Tommy falling asleep beneath him. 

“No,” he says honestly. The pounding in his head is unrelenting, and he swears he can smell tequila in the layer of sweat that’s cooling beneath his now-damp t-shirt. “I think I’m dying. This is what death feels like.” 

He can feel Tommy’s laugh rumbling in his chest, warm and familiar. “This is a hangover in your thirties, baby.” 

“Same thing,” Buck mumbles, his eyes fluttering shut as Tommy dips his head down to press a kiss to the top of his head. As he drifts back to sleep, Tommy’s quiet laugh is the last thing he hears before sleep takes him.

prompt game

[hellcat8908]

Omg I love all you adult Nyx fics I had this idea only if it peaks your interest were Nyx goes missing for like 3 months and the inner circle are trying to find him and they trace him to this cottage and they sneak in to find reader asleep on one side of Nyx and nyx holding a baby and how the inner circle would react

If not completely fine ignore this have a great day/ night lovely 🤍🤍🤍

Thank you for requesting this. I hope it lives up to your expectations and is close to what you had in mind. Hope you have an amazing day/night

Secrets Adult Nyx x Female Reader

Warnings: Angst, Language

It wasn't long after you met Nyx in Hewn City that the bond snapped for both of you. You'd never been happier than you were when you were with him. He found a quiet cottage outside of Velaris and wasted no time moving you into it. He knew you didn't have an easy life, but he was determined to make it better now that you were with him. You didn't want your parents to find out for fear they'd try to use you to get to him and his family. You had always been a political pawn for them and suffered greatly when you didn't play your part.

Nyx understood, and the two of you decided to keep your relationship hidden until you were both comfortable. It wasn't long before you became pregnant. The urge to tell his family was overwhelming, but he wasn't sure how they would react and didn't want to put you through that if it turned negative. Nyx kept up appearances with his family and even hired a private healer to monitor you and the baby during the pregnancy. With only 3 months left before your due date, she ordered you to bed rest. Nyx refused to leave your side once he found out.

For those 3 months, he made sure you had everything you needed without having to lift a finger. He cooked your favorite meals and made sure to take care of any cravings you had. When the time came, he never hesitated to give you whatever you needed in that moment. He was supportive and loving throughout the whole ordeal. He admired his son in your arms as he peacefully nursed. Once Caelan had a full belly and released a healthy burp, he slept peacefully in Nyx's arms. Exhaustion was catching up with you, causing you to curl up beside Nyx and fall asleep.

Nyx admired his new family while you slept. He gently talked and cooed at Caelan, who held onto Nyx's finger in his sleep. In that moment, every was worth it, the secrets, the hiding, and the traveling back and forth. He would do it all over again just for this moment. The moment was soon interrupted as the bedroom door opened, revealing his parents. They stood in stunned silence as they took in the scene before them. Nyx indicated to move to the living room before laying Caelan in his crib.

He quietly shuts the bedroom door before making his way to the living room and finding not only his parents but most of the inner circle. "So this is where you've been for 3 months? Living with some girl and her baby? Meanwhile we've been worried something had happened to you! We spent so much time looking for you just to find you here!" Rhys shouts, unable to control his anger and hurt. "She isn't some girl, and that's not just her baby! That is my mate, y/n, and that baby is your grandson!" Nyx says through gritted teeth.

The sound of arguing had woken you up. You found your bed empty and Caelan in his crib, starting to fuss. "It's ok, Cae, mommy's got you." You say as you carefully pick him up. He starts to settle down as you gently rock him and rub his back, being careful of his wings. You hold him close as you can't help but listen to the argument in the other room.

"You can't be serious! If she's your mate, why are you hiding her from us?!" Rhys replies. "It's complicated, and I'll explain it once you've calmed down and are ready to listen!" Nyx seeths. "Feyre, don't you have something to say?!" Rhys asks, looking for some support. As soon as Nyx looks at her, the first of many tears falls. She just shakes her head softly and walks out of the cottage. "Mom, wait -" Nyx tries to stop her, but she winnows before he can say anything. "I hope you're happy with what you've done." Rhys says. "Get out! All of you! You're not welcome here!" Nyx shouts before walking back to the bedroom.

Once the door is closed behind him, he lets out a sigh. He notices you sitting on the bed with Caelan. "I'm sorry, love." He apologizes as he sits beside you. "It's ok. It was only a matter of time." You tell him as you watch Caelan sleep. "They shouldn't be bothering us again." He says as he puts his arm around you. "I didn't want you to have to choose between families." You tell him. "It was never a choice. The two of you are all I need." He says. You notice a sadness in his eyes as he says the words. You know you have to find a way to fix this for him.

The next morning, you sneak out while Nyx is in the shower and Caelan is sleeping. You leave him a note on the nightstand. You manage to make your way into Velaris and find your way to the river house. You knock before letting your nerves get to you. Feyre opens the door, looking surprised to see you. "I'm sorry for disturbing you, High Lady, but I was hoping to have a bit of your time." You say, less than confident, almost expecting her to slam the door in your face.

She steps aside, allowing you to enter. You follow her into the living room and take a seat across from her. "Would you like anything to drink?" She asks. "No, thank you." You say feeling awkward. "I don't want to take up too much of your time, I'm sure you have a lot going on. I just wanted to apologize. I can't imagine how you must've felt the last 3 months. I don't expect you to forgive me, but I hope someday you can forgive Nyx. I know he loves you all dearly and has told me how amazing and caring his family is. I don't want him to lose that because of me. I know we handled things wrong, but we both felt like it was the right way at the time. I'm sorry for the hurt I've caused you." You say genuinely.

"Y/n, wait. I never had any ill will towards either of you. I'm sure your reasons for the secrecy were valid, but it didn't take the sting away. I missed out on your pregnancy and the birth of my grandson, but I don't want to miss out on anything else." Feyre says. "Join us for dinner tonight. It will give us all a chance to clear the air and try to make things right." You say, hopeful. "I'd like that." Feyre says with a soft smile. "We'll see you tonight. Is there anything special you would like?" You ask. "Whatever you make will be perfect." She says warmly. "Can I ask how you are getting home?" Feyre asks. "The same way I got here, walking."

"I'll winnow you home." She says. "I'm fine walking. I don't wish to be a bother." You say. "It's no bother. Besides, it would make me feel better about you getting home safely." She says, and you can't help but agree. She winnows you close to home, not wanting to upset Nyx with her presence until you have a chance to talk to him. You thank her for seeing you and bringing you home. She tells you she's looking forward to tonight before she winnows back to Velaris.

You find Nyx sitting on the porch with Caelan as you walk up to the house. "How did it go?" He says, keeping his tone neutral. "Better than I was expecting. She didn't slam the door in my face." You answer. "No matter how upset she is, I doubt she would ever slam a door in anyone's face, except maybe Tamlin." He responds. "They're coming for dinner tonight." You tell him. "Great." He says as he gets up and walks inside. "Ok, you're mad at me. I'm sorry I went to talk to your mom without you. I just couldn't let you lose your family and have it be my fault." You say as you follow him.

"I don't care that you went to see my mom, I'm glad you did. I care that you felt you needed to sneak off and leave Caelan to do so. I care that something could've easily happened to you along the way. I care that you didn't feel you could come to me and tell me what you were doing." He says, causing Caelan to fuss in his arms. "Nyx, I'm sorry I wasn't thinking. I just felt like I needed to fix this and that you wouldn't want me to try to talk to her." You say apologetically. "No more secrets." He says as he coaxes you to look at him. "Agreed." You respond. "So my parents are coming to dinner, are you sure you're ready for that?" He asks with concern.

"We need to start somewhere. I want them to be a part of Caelan's life. Besides, you can't blame them. We did keep some major secrets from them." You tell him. "Guess we better start getting ready then." Nyx says. You spend the rest of the day cleaning and taking care of Caelan before starting dinner. You're just finishing up when Feyre and Rhys show up. Feyre offers to help you while Nyx and Rhys take a moment outside. "Should I be concerned?" You ask once the door is closed. "No, they have their own way of working things out. It's best to leave it to them." Feyre says with a smile.

Once you and Feyre have the dinner table set, the boys rejoin you. "Did you get it sorted out?" You ask. "Yeah." They both answer at the same time. Nyx lays Caelan in the bassinet before taking a seat beside you. "Looks amazing, love." He says. "Thanks. Hopefully, it tastes as good as it looks." You reply with a smile. You enjoy the meal with casual conversation between the four of you. Once dinner is done, Nyx and Rhys offer to clean up since you cooked. You join Feyre on the couch as she holds Caelan. "He is perfect." She tells you as she admires her grandson.

"Y/n, I wanted to apologize for what I said yesterday. It was out of line regardless of the situation. I should have controlled my emotions better." Rhys says from the other side of Feyre. "I understand how shocking yesterday was, and I'm sorry for the secrecy around Nyx and mine's relationship." You apologize while Nyx gives your knee a reassuring squeeze. "With my parents always trying for political and social gain, I didn't want them to try to exploit my relationship with Nyx or have you think my intentions with him were anything less than true." You admit to them.

"Anyone can see how in love the two of you are. I'm sorry we had such a negative first impression, but I hope tonight helps make up for it." Feyre says. "I really enjoyed tonight and look forward to it again." You say with a smile. "We do a weekly family dinner with the rest of the inner circle. You'll always welcome to join, or we could come here, whichever you're more comfortable with." Feyre says excitedly. "That sounds great, plus it will give you more time with Caelan." Nyx says. You carry on casual conversation until you realize how late it's getting.

"Thank you again for having us." Feyre says as she hugs you, then Nyx. "It was our pleasure." You answer as Rhys hugs you next. They say goodbye to Caelan before winnowing home. "Have I told you how amazing you are lately?" Nyx says as he follows you into the bedroom. "Not lately." You say with a smile. "You truly are amazing. Thank you for tonight and for making the effort." He says before kissing you. "I could see how they would be upset. Imagine if Caelan pulled what we did." You say after returning the kiss. "Don't even say that." Nyx groans at the idea.

You ready Caelan for bed before changing into pajamas. Once in bed, Nyx pulls you into his arms and cuddles you. "Maybe we'll get lucky, and he'll be better behaved." You say with a grin. "Unlikely if he is anything like me, plus if he hangs out with Cassian, we are doomed." Nyx teases. "Well, we can only hope." You respond. "This is true." Nyx agrees as he settles in under the blankets. "I love you." You say softly. "I love you too." Nyx murmurs in your hair as you both fall asleep.

[livelaughlovesubs]

My favorite trope is roommates, and my favorite character is Aventurine <3

Can I order Aventurine X Reader (gender is your choice) as friends with benefits , I would like to create something more interesting but nothing comes to mind ;')

Ding ding! Your order arrived. A few headcanons it is?

Dom!reader x sub!aventurine - roommate AU

- when Aventurine first come to the IPC, he had a low rank and thus had to share his room, that’s how you two met

- he was very eye-catching, because of his looks, especially his eyes

- you two just kind of kicked it off, he was very charming and friendly

- after some time you found out that was only a facade, and now that he has opened up to you, he got more cheeky

- you two liked to spend time drinking together and talk

- one thing led to another and you two just made out (oh no, what to do?)

- nothing more, nothing less, only tongue kissing

- on the next day you two talked it out, it was awkward but you two came to a mutual understanding

- that’s how you two became friends with benefits

- sometimes you two would drink and have sex, other times you’d just cuddle like a real couple, and he might trauma dump but you don’t mind (?)

- Aven is giving switch energy, so he’ll just do what you prefer

- but you two don’t do that very often, cuz most of the time you both are busy with work

- after Aventurine climbed up the ranks, he changed locations though, so there was a period where you two didn’t have much contact

- all you knew was that he was the new big hit, and his value kept going up, so did the quality of his home

- when he got to the point where he was one of the higher ups, he decided to change your dorm and instead make you live with him again

- guess he kinda missed your company

- that’s how you now share an apartment with him, with your boss, whom you ravage once in a blue moon

[mybworlds]

CHAPTER 12

status: ongoing

pairing: joel miller x f!reader

summary: your life is full of 'must'. You live with your overprotective mother who controls every aspect of your life. You have a dream, to write romance novels, but love - real love - you haven't found yet. Your mother has even decided what you must do in your free time: play music. One day, however, when you go to your music teacher's house, you will have an unexpected encounter and from that day on things change…

Masterlist

Before to start. . . Please take your time to read 'cause it's quite lenghty. 📖

rating: 18+ explicit (minors, DNI)

Thanks @vase-of-lilies for the banner and thanks @saradika-graphics for the divider.

Taglist: @harriedandharassed

The weekend - end with Joel unfortunately came to an end. The enchantment is over and everything is back exactly as it was. Or almost, Joel, the night before the two of you went back to your lives, gave you a small set of keys.

"If you want to come here and write, you can. With or without me. There's an important part of you here and it's right that, when you want to, you come. Feel free to do." he told you "If you want to run away and seek refuge, you can do it here."

You are in your room lying on your bed with the small wooden guitar he carved for you a long ago clutched in one hand and the keys to his house in the other. You clutch them tightly to your heart as if to feel Joel close to you. You miss him already.

This makes you realize one thing: there's no longer a place for Jack in your life or in your heart. You want to be with Joel. You want him to be a part of you, you want everyone to know that you don't care that he's older than you, but that you love him. Yes, you love him.

You can't do without him.

Your phone rings.

It's Jack.

"I haven't heard from you once." he says.

"Well, you too." you reply in an icy tone.

"Would you like to talk about what happened a few nights ago?" he asks you.

The truth is that you don't care. You don't want someone like him next to you, someone who makes you feel bad, who doesn't support you, who doesn't understand you. No, thank you.

"There's nothing to say," you reply in the same tone.

"So … are we okay?" he asks.

"No, maybe I wasn't clear. Jack. . . I'm sorry, but I don't want a person who doesn't support me, who doesn't understand what's important to me," you answer.

For a moment you feel like the phone line has gone dead, then he resumes "So, we don't want to see each other again?"

"No." you reply flatly "Bye Jack, have a nice life." you add and then cut off the call.

Your heart beats fast in your chest. You feel as if freed from a burden.

Maybe you were too hard on Jack, but you don’t want continue leading him on, it’s not fair. You don't love him. You never had.

Now you can be with Joel.

But how can you see him if he is no longer in town now?

Simple, you look for something that might convince your mother to let you leave for a few days. You look for an idea, anything to get away, but at the moment you can't think of anything.

You fall asleep looking for an idea.

Your life flows quietly, you go to work at the bar, when you come back you practice your chords, you very rarely go to church with your mother hoping to get some ideas on how you can reach Joel. The man who teaches these classes sees you and approaches you with a big smile. He's a great speaker, has great language property, and you are not surprised that your mother is fascinated by him, but you fear that he is yet another foothold your mother is looking for in the course of her life. The man, a fellow named Mark, will be a few years older than your mother, tells you that he's glad you are there with them, that you too therefore are seeking the salvation of your soul and that only through prayer can this happen.

You lower your head, you don't want to burst out laughing in his face, you don't believe in this, you never had and you won't start now. Everything you hear only increase this your total belief. You are not like your mother who believes whatever she is told. No.

"Boo," your mother says, "have you seen how interesting these classes are?"

Of course.

"Yes, you right. You know, I've been thinking about going deeper," you begin. Your mother's eyes sparkle, she thinks she convinced you and converted you to all this. Not at all.

"You could go for a prayer retreat with Mark and his group." she offers enthusiastically "If I could, I would go too, but I have to work."

You take advantage of it.

"Mom, actually I'd like to go with my friend Kristen and her prayer group, you know, she's also attending. Her group is in the small town near ours, I know they are leaving next week for a prayer retreat, maybe I can go with her so I would have her company."

Kristen is the friend your mother always liked the most, she always saw her as a proper young person, judicious, polite, charitable, in short a perfect friend and girl.

"Fine. But you'll have to let me know then what you think, though, and then next time you and I will go with Mark's group."

Now you just need to let Kristen know.

"We'll talk." you say with a small smile "Would you like a pizza? Shall we eat it at the diner?"

"All right." she replies, taking you under her arm.

The evening unfolds as quietly as possible, you don't talk much, you just make a few sporadic comments about the pizza, the place, the meeting you attended, but nothing more.

Fortunately Joel calls when you returned by now and your mother is in bed. You check to see if you can talk freely and realize that she is soundly asleep. Joel tells you about his day, but more than anything he asks if you have been to his house, he wants to know if you are writing, if you are doing everything to pursue your dream, but you tell him you are going tomorrow.

"I miss you," you tell him, "I wish you were here," you add.

"I can't move, honey." he tells you in a regretful tone "We may not see each other not earlier than three weeks, it's gonna be complicated days for me."

"For me too, Miller. I'll. . ." you stop, you were about to tell him I love you, but then you reconsider, you don't know if your feeling is mutual, and what if he replies he doesn't feel the same way for you? You don't think you can stand such a response from him.

"You, what?" he encourages you, you swallow, afraid, you close your eyes "Baby, are you there?"

"Yes." you answer "I'm very tired, sorry. . ."

"No, no, 's okay. Go to sleep, I wish you good night, baby. A kiss, I hope whatever you dream will come true sooner or later." he says before to hang up the phone.

You will surely dream about him, his dark eyes, his plushy lips smiling at you and kissing you softly, his messy hair falling on his forehead, his arms caging the sides of your face, you dream about him with one hand cupping your face and with the other moving a strand of your hair and smiling at you. You see him on top of you whispering sweet, reassuring words in that sweet, warm voice of his, your hands in his hair as you press yourself against him. His hand along your bare chest, his large hand caressing your breasts, thumb and forefinger teasing first one nipple and then the other. Your breath breaks. His bulge pushing against your inner thigh, your breaths getting shorter and shorter, you almost feel him stroking you with a finger first to taste your intimacy then slowly sinking inside you, inch by inch. You gasp. It feels so good, the rhythm he's giving with his finger that breaks your breath, he then strokes you rhythmically with two fingers, filling you all the way, you swallow squeezing your eyes shut and clutching your sheets in a fist. You mumble his name, bite your lower lip. You feel the blood boil in your veins as he continues to pump in a relentless rhythm inside you, then your mouth opens wide in a dull moan, your lips trembling.

You open your eyes, he's not here, but your imagination brought you into his arms to come violently.

Being in his house without him causes you a strange grip, you feel like you are in a beautiful soulless place. You feel empty, you just look around as if you almost feel a presence around you. You feel ridiculous thinking about this. After all, it's not the first time you've come here, of course it's the first time you're alone here, but you've been with him so many times. There's nothing to be afraid of.

"You recognize this place?" you ask Joel, sending him a message with a photograph of you sitting on his couch.

You turn on the computer he gave you and write, write, write. The words come out spontaneously, effortlessly, when you lift your head from the computer you realize it is almost evening. You stretch, turn off the pc, drink a glass of water, go to the bathroom and then leave.

Joel hasn't answered you, that's not like him, who knows maybe he's just really busy, you tell yourself.

As you're on your way home, you contact Kristen, you absolutely must warn her of your idea: you explain your plan and she tells you that she also has to actually go to a prayer meeting and she has to go to the very town where Joel is working. You explain that you are going to pretend to join them, but that you are actually going to Joel, you want to see him.

You check your phone, but Joel has not answered or displayed yet. You decide to call him, but his phone just rings. That's weird. You text him, but nothing, he doesn't answer or call you. You think about many things, then you decide that since he doesn't answer you, you need to leave, you need to see him now more than ever.

Convincing your mother was as easy as a glass of water, she wanted to talk to Kristen of course who confirmed your prayer meetings, provided many details of arrival and departure, and you, to reassure your mother, promised to call her as soon as you arrived, in the afternoon and evening. You prepare your small luggage and, since your mother won't let you drive, you leave with Kristen. The only problem is that Joel doesn't know you are coming and you don't know where to look for him.

Someone says that doing surprises is never a good thing because you inevitably get surprises, you try to chase that thought away, you don't want to believe that you are the one getting the surprise. You check your phone, Joel hasn't been in touch or answered your texts for almost twenty-four hours, and on the one hand it agitates you, but on the other it leads you to think that maybe he's just really busy.

While you're thinking that you've been foolish in leaving like that without informing him of your arrival, you remember the name of the company he works at and so your field of inquiry narrows; you're not alone, luckily you're accompanied by Kristen and a friend of hers, a guy named Xavier, a tall, muscular, blue-eyed, black-haired handsome guy. You think he's there with you because he cares about your friend, but this is your own thought, you may be wrong.

The places you see are one shabbier than the next, fortunately Xavier is with the two of you. When you arrive at another construction site, you realize you're in the right place, you ask for Joel and at that moment you are approached by a chick all dirty with a chipped protective helmet, she says your name, you turn around "D' you know me?" you ask her puzzled.

"It's like I know you, Joel talks about you all the time. You're here for him, aren't you?" her expression tense, focused "Come with me." she tells you, turning her back to the three of you.

"Uhm, can you wait for me? I'll let you know right away," you tell them.

When you turn around, you see the woman waiting for you with her hands in her uniform pockets, then noticing that you are joining her, she continues. She urges you to be careful several times, climbing flights of semi-dangerous stairs, when you almost reach the top, your heart in your throat with fear, but the idea of seeing him urges you on.

"Don't be frightened, dunno how much he's told you," she says as if you know what she's talking about "It's less worse than it looks." she stops on the landing "He's over there, he fell pretty bad, but other than a few cuts and bruises, he's okay."

You furrow your brow, the woman talks about it almost as if she said he scraped his knee, as if it were obvious. Well, maybe it is, but not to you.

"Didn't he tell you, did he?" she asks noticing your worried expression "You stubborn fool." she says in a sigh "Come." she adds giving you a little pat on your arm.

You follow her worriedly to a semi-closed door, "Wait." she tells you, then enters.

Your heart is pounding in your chest, that's why he didn't write or call you, but when did this happen? Yesterday? Last night? This morning? It doesn't matter when, but how he is, you hope with all your heart that nothing serious happened to him and that it's just a few scratches like the ones you've also seen before.

The door opens, the woman's eyes are downcast as she comes out, then she raises them to you, "He's in a bad mood, but I think with you he's…well, we gave him a painkiller." she tells you as she walks past you.

"But how did that happen?" you ask stopping her.

"That stubborn fellow last night at five o'clock had to knock off, but he wanted to finish a job upstairs at all costs, so he stayed with four other unconscious men like him until eight o'clock. By that time it's dark up here, very dark in spite of the lights, he slipped along with some equipment on the ramp leading upstairs." you pale "The cuts are mostly superficial, except for one on his side. A couple of friends working in the ER stitched him up."

"He needs to be taken to the hospital," you say seriously concerned.

She smiles bitterly and shakes her head "Since that episode happened to his daughter, Miller hasn't set foot in a hospital." the woman looks at you as if she has let a secret slip.

"What happened to his daughter?" you ask her hoping she will talk, but she shakes her head and replies "I can't be the one to tell you about it, he has to. If you're as important to him as it seems. . . well, he'll talk to you about it sooner or later." you lower your gaze "Now go to him."

You swallow, then turn away from the woman and enter, the room is semi-dark and cold, there are dozens of cabinets along two walls and then at the back a window through which only faint glimpses of light enter and a worn sofa on which Joel is lying. You leave your bag at the doorway dropping it and hurry next to him from the side, his face is swollen, you can clearly make out a cut at the level of his left cheekbone and lower lip, his arms are covered with large bloodstained bandages and his work uniform is half-open revealing a gauze on his side below which you imagine are the stitches the woman told you about.

You very gently caress the contour of his face, his face twitching in a small grimace perhaps from pain perhaps from discomfort you don't know, he opens his eyes and when he sees you he hints a pale smile "Is it the painkillers or are you really here?"

"Joel. . ." you tell him in a whisper moving closer to his face "I'm here."

"My beautiful. . . wonderful. . . writer" he mumbles raising an arm toward your face, when his hand brushes your face and then moves your hair you have chills, you place your hand on his, you feel it warm and ruined under your fingers "'m fine." he adds "Don't be impressed, I've been worse."

"Is that why you don't want me to see you naked?" you ask smiling and causing him to smile back.

"Guessed." he replies closing his eyes, for a while you don't speak again, you think he has fallen asleep, but then he says, "I missed feeling your breath against my skin."

"I missed you." you confess, squeezing his hand a little tighter and placing a kiss on the back of his hand "If something happened to you. . ." the words choke in your throat.

"'m right here, honey. 'm not going anywhere." he tells you reassuringly and stroking your cheek with his fingertips in a slow and extremely gentle gesture.

You place your head suddenly between arm and shoulder and he barely jerks, "Sorry!" you exclaim, but he holds you down "No, 's okay, just take it easy. Come on." he tells you moving a little further into the couch. You remain lying on that small and uncomfortable couch, you don't dare to move for fear of hurting him, he's the one looking for your hand, which he occasionally squeezes, but without making a sound. You wonder if he squeezes it to reassure you or because he feels pain.

It's your cell phone vibrating, interrupting that almost perfect silence, Kristen. You completely forgot about her! You reassure her that everything is fine and that you are with Joel; then, she reminds you to call your mother and tells you she is leaving.

Joel just turns his face toward yours, "You here alone?"

"No," you answer, shaking your head, "I'm with Kristen. She was waiting for me downstairs, you know, afraid that it wasn't the right construction site or that you weren't here," you explain to him.

"If you want to go with your friend, go. I think I'll stay a little longer like this and then go home. Join me later if you want." he tells you in a slightly dizzy voice.

"No." you tell him, "I came for you. If you want me, I'll stay with you," you tell him, looking at him.

He opens and closes his eyes, pulls you gently toward him making your head rest in the crook of his neck, "I want you all the time." he tells you "You know, I've been thinking about you all the time lately. There's not a moment in my day when my thoughts don't go to you." you lift your face slightly toward him "I have three words on the tip of my tongue, but dunno if it's fair to tell you." he adds before breathing deeply.

Your heart pounding in your chest, you close your eyes and inhale his scent.

"I have them too, from the bottom of my heart," you whisper, holding you to him and closing your eyes.

When Joel feels better, the two of you with Tess drive him home. You've reclined the passenger seat to make him lie down or almost lie down, you're sitting in the middle in the back seat. Tess doesn't talk much, she just casts brief glances at you from the rearview mirror and occasionally glances toward Joel who, however, does not look at you or at her.

The little house Joel rented here is much smaller than the one he has in town. In fact, it has a kitchenette, a bedroom and a bathroom. You help him shed his overalls, although he initially rebelled at being treated like he's ill, but you insisted. You sit him down on the worn-out couch in the kitchen and there for the first time you see his completely naked torso and it's huge, but what strikes you most besides his mighty are the many old and new cuts and scars that decorate his arms, his shoulder blades, his back. You are tempted to caress them all, but not now. You try to wash him as best you can without getting too close to the area where the stitches are. Your eyes constantly cross, when he sees you uncertain he reassures you with a look or a nod.

Once finished, you help him put on a clean T-shirt and invite him to stay there while you prepare a plate of pasta with some tomato sauce, again he rebels initially, but in the face of your firm tone he can only surrender. You hand him the plate by sitting next to him, eating in silence. From time to time he lays his head back against the backrest and closes his eyes holding his breath, "Does it hurt?" he shakes his head, but the expression on his face says otherwise "What can I do?" you ask him.

He turns to you, "You're here." he tells you causing you to miss a beat and smile. You enjoy each other's company, he would like to lean toward you and kiss you, but the stitches are pulling and he must not strain. You accompany him to bed, where he wears only a T-shirt and a pair of dark boxers. You swallow, if he wasn't like this. . .

You stop that thought from your mind, "Come." he says, inviting you to join him. You are wearing a shirt from a few years ago now ruined and three sizes larger, it's so big that it almost reaches your knee. You wear only that one to sleep in and briefs.

You lie down next to him, he's on his back, you can see him in the semi-darkness of the room, "Who was that woman at the construction site?" you ask, turning to him and gently laying a hand on his chest.

"Tess, a pain in the ass, but she's the only friend I have. The only one who has known me for years. She's a tough cookie."

"I saw. She seems cool," you say.

He nods, then turns to you, "Did you go to my place to write?"

"Once. I wrote. A lot. But without you, it's not the same." you say making squiggles on his chest with your index finger "I would have wanted you around, maybe hugging me and taking a look at what I was writing." you confide, he turns back to you "Next time.'' he tells you, giving you a kiss on your lips.

He takes your hand that was lying on his chest and squeezes it tightly intertwining his fingers with yours, he then runs his fingers down to your forearm and then looking you in the eyes he says "Come." you look at him puzzled "Come on me, I want to kiss you properly." he adds.

Your heart is pounding, you don't know how or, rather, you have a vague idea, but you don't know if it's right. He holds your hand as he guides you by making you lie completely on him. You feel even smaller in this position on him.

"If you have pain or discomfort, tell me," you tell him referring to the stitches, he shakes his head softly and then pulls you closer to him.

You are face to face, Joel barely leans toward you and captures your lips in a kiss that takes your breath away. You think back to how sick you were without him, you think back to the fear you had when you learned he was hurt, as Joel slips a hand through your hair crushing you even more against him.

I love you, you'd like to say, you'd like to let him know, as you too plunge your hands into his hair and your breaths grow shorter and shorter and merge into each other.

His arms held you close to him all night, you did nothing but exchange long caresses, glances and kisses. And that was enough for you. You wake up with your head on his chest, your hair partly on his chest and partly on your shoulders, you raise your head slowly and look at Joel's face. His lips parted, his hair tousled - and it's partly your fault too - a serene expression on his face, his wrinkles barely noticeable. The grazes and bruises clash so much with his handsome face.

You gently stroke his forehead to check that he doesn't have a fever or any other problems; thankfully, everything is fine. He's breathing normally and doing well. You check that the stitches are still intact, once you are satisfied that all is well, you caress his face, his features, you feel under your fingers his unshaven beard, caress in a gesture entirely new to you his neck, his Adam's apple. You see him wrinkle his nose and furrow his brow, then slowly open his eyes finding your eyes at once, you smile at him and he smiles back.

"G' morning." you say smily.

"'Morning." he says with his voice still slurred from sleep "How long have you been awake?"

"A little while." you reply, giving him a kiss on his sternum.

"And what were ya doing?" he asks looking at you with his dark brown eyes.

"I was watching you. Sorry. . . maybe that's creepy for you. . ." you are about to say, but he smiles so you stop.

"Remember when we slept together at my house?" you nod "I watched you sleep, too. You were like a magnet, I couldn't stop doing it." he continues cupping your cheek, you close your eyes for a moment surrendering to his touch and feeling your heart beating fast "You were. . . you're beautiful." he says gently stroking your lower lip with his thumb.

"I wish. . ." you are about to say something you never thought you would have the courage to say out loud considering your lack of knowledge on the subject, in fact to tell the truth you thought you would only ever write it down in your stories and instead. . .

"Would you like to?" he urges you, stroking your hair.

"I would like to. . ." you bite your lower lip softly "I'd like to make love with you." you say all in one breath, now you would like to hide from his huge dark eyes that seem to want to read you inside, you see him swallow and then he caresses the contour of your face with a finger "Sorry, maybe. . . uhm. . . you don't want to, you don't. . ." you don't know how to continue.

"Who told you I don't want to?" he tells you wrinkling his forehead.

You look at him incredulously almost, blinking several times unable to comment on his answer.

"I just don't think you're ready yet."

"I am." you reply, trying to sound firm and tame that unfamiliar fire inside you.

"We should wait a little longer. I don't want you to have even more pain than necessary." he says moving a strand of hair behind your ear "Y' know it's going to hurt the first time, right?" you nod "I don't want you to feel even more pain because I didn't prepare you properly." he adds.

You lower your gaze for a second, "By prepare well. . . what exactly do you mean?" you ask, showing him once again your inexperience.

"When I feel better, we'll talk about it," he replies.

Interrupting that almost awkward moment there's your phone vibrating.

MOM, it appears on the screen.

Shit, you totally forgot.

"Hello?" you say snapping to your phone answering immediately.

"Weren't you supposed to call me as soon as you got here, were you?" she scolds you.

"Sorry, you're right, while we got the room and then settled in, the meetings. . . sorry." you look toward Joel who scrutinizes you with an indecipherable look.

"Is Kristen with you?" she asks.

"She went downstairs, we have a meeting soon and she went to get croissants before to start, I just got out of the shower."

"All right. So, I won't keep you, have a good day. Call me tonight."

"Alright, bye." you say interrupting the call and placing your cell phone on the bedside table.

You sigh and then turn your gaze to Joel, who stares thoughtfully at the ceiling, you stroke his arm and he looks back at you "You had to tell more lies." it's not a question, it's a statement, and his tone of voice is very, very bitter.

"I didn't tell her about-"

"Us?" he asks you "She asked about you and John though!" he retorts, returning to staring at the ceiling with a disappointed, regretful air "Right?" he adds, turning back to you.

"I only told her about Jack because it would have been more acceptable to her," you tell him, but then you regret what you said because you told him that he's no good.

He looks at you, his expression is full of pain "Got it," he only says, but you don't think he understood what you really wanted to say "Can you help me up?" he says, you want to tell him no, but his tone doesn't admit any other answer but yes.

You get up from the bed and go to his side, put your hands on his shoulder blades as he, too, clutches your forearms to give himself that push he needs to sit up; you feel against your hair his warm breath get short, "How's it going sitting up?" you ask him.

"Fine." he answers you, but his tone is icy; he's angry about what you said.

You kneel down in front of him, "Joel," you say laying a hand on his knee, "I'm sorry if you misunderstood, but I didn't mean that you're not good enough. I didn't mean that, sorry if I misspoke. You are everything to me. I've had a lot of firsts with you, you're the only one I trust completely, I've never slept with anyone, I've never allowed anyone to touch me, I've never allowed anyone to get into my heart." you tell him looking straight into his eyes hoping this time not to be misunderstood.

He says nothing, looking down at you with his huge dark eyes, his breath short from the exertion he has just made, "If I should get too much," he says, but you shush him by stepping even closer and telling him, "I don't want to hear it, it won't happen."

"If it should," he resumes, "I want you to tell me and I won't see you again, I won't look for you, I won't put you in a position to lie to be with me, but to be with that other guy. . ."

"Joel," you interrupt him again, "I broke up with Jack. I don't want to be with him, I don't want him. There's only you." you tell him, feeling his breath stop for a moment as well.

"I can't be mad at you," he admits, stroking your lower lip again with a finger "Come," he says making you sit on his lap, "The truth is you drive me crazy." he tells you slipping a hand through your hair making your face come closer to his "I wish you were happy away from me, but I don't want you to go away. I'm so selfish. . ."

You kiss him fleetingly on the lips, "I don't want to be away from you. Got it?" you ask him sinking your hands into his curls, resting your forehead against his causing your breaths to mingle, "Please don't doubt how you feel about me," you tell him, "Because I have no doubt."

He captures your lips in a passionate kiss, your tongues dancing madly and your breaths growing shorter and shorter. He pushes you toward him, slipping his large, warm hands under your T-shirt and sitting you on his intimacy only covered by his boxers.

You never want to break this kiss, but you both need to catch your breath.

He caresses your arms, then looks long into your eyes as if to ask your permission, you nod giving him your silent consent, and he slips his hands under your T-shirt lifting it up and slipping it off with your help. You remain with your torso completely naked on him, feeling exposed and vulnerable, but it feels so erotic, so beautiful, more beautiful than you ever thought.

You thought that feeling his gaze on your chest, on you, would make you strongly uncomfortable, you thought you would even freeze, and instead in a rush, which you didn't think you had, you bring his hands to your bare breasts. You both groan at that contact, "Can I kiss it?" he asks you without breaking eye contact, "Yes." you reply in a trembling voice.

Feeling his lips on your nipple makes you gasp and at the same time close your eyes, you let yourself go completely to his caresses. Feeling his unshaven beard there, his hot breath, his tongue licking you gently and his lips sucking gently your breast, lead you to moan and gently bite your lower lip. You press his head against your chest, perhaps hurting him, but it is a sensation that sends you completely out of the ordinary.

"I'd stay kissing your breast for hours, 's perfect. You are perfect." he tells you, moving from one breast to the other with a little pop.

"J - Joel… please…" you find yourself pleading without even knowing exactly what the next step to take is, your vision blurs, you press yourself harder against him making your intimacies cling together as well, he gasps "Touch me." you say, he pulls his face away from your chest and you, in a bold move, get up from him slipping off your briefs and sit back down on him, on his now clearly evident prominence.

"You drive me crazy." he tells you taking a long moment to observe you, you are completely naked on top of him while he's still wearing his now bulky T-shirt and boxers.

"Take me." you tell him, bringing his hands to your hips.

He smiles as if you have said something particularly funny, "What?" you ask him blinking.

"What have you done with the sweet version of you?" he asks you barely clasping his hands on your hips, you smile at him giving him a kiss first on his lips and then moving down his neck, feeling him hold his breath.

"I'm still the same." you answer him between kisses "Sweet and insecure, but other times I know what I want and you know thanks to who?" you add going up to his chin giving him a very light bite "Thanks to you." you resume looking into his eyes.

"If I could move freely…" he tells you as a small grimace appears on his face, causing him to furrow his brow.

"What would you do?" you ask, looking at him with eyes full of curiosity and lust.

He swallows, moves a strand of your hair and then with his hands descends back down to your intimacy, wraps it completely in his hand and caresses your outer lips with a finger. You hold your breath tightening your grip on his shoulders, you look into his eyes as if seeking safety, he kisses the tip of your nose as he continues that exhausting caress. Your intimacy throbs, you feel yourself on fire as he continues those movements with a slow cadence making you want to be filled completely by his big finger.

"Joel…" you moan, pressing even harder against his chest eager for more clutch.

Finally, oh finally, his finger sinks inside you, inch by inch, it's a sensation that makes you hold your breath, but you deeply desired, he stays still for a while then slowly begins to pump in and out, the rhythm makes you moan and close your eyes. After a while he stops and you, with blurred vision, look at him puzzled, "Now I will insert another finger, if you have pain tell me and I will stop."

A second finger? It will never go in, or will it?

He must have noticed the bewilderment on your face because he reassures you, "Don't worry, I'll go very slowly. I won't do anything that will hurt you, okay?" you nod, "You tell me if you want me to stop, though," he reiterates.

A second finger enters you very, very slowly, sinking even more slowly than the first in your throbbing cunt. You feel your walls almost give way to his passage, you groan and close your eyes, it feels. . . strange, but so. . . you are at a loss for words. It's even better than you could have thought!

With the palm of his hand he rubs your clit sending more discharges of pure lust all along your body, you moan shamelessly rubbing yourself against him, "Joel. . . oh. . ." you can't speak, he lays his other hand at the base of your back stroking you with slow gestures, "I'm going to. . . I'm going to. . ."

"'s okay, just let go." his words are enough, his fingers continuing to move in and out of you at an ever-increasing pace, his hand caressing you is enough to make you close your eyes and let out a long resounding moan.

You let go, abandoning your head on his shoulder as he continues to pump gently still in and out of you, then he pulls his fingers away from you and you feel his hands encircling you and moving closer to your torso and then placing a kiss between your shoulder and your neck, "'s okay." he says then giving you another kiss on your neck and moving your hair causing you to shiver.

When you open your eyes again, you notice how visibly aroused he is, how his arousal is. . . big, very big, you have chills. You want to make love with him, but he will never fit that inside you.

He lays a kiss on your forehead, then you look up and meet his eyes, "We were fighting. . . and then. . ." he says with a smile, a smile you return, "then you realized the reason was futile." you complete. He nods, "You are. . ." he sighs noisily "so important to me, to my life, to my heart." he admits, caressing your face and scrutinizing you for a long time. You press yourself against him wrapping your arms around his neck, he groans. You sat on him completely, you also jerk and lower your gaze, "No." he says almost interpreting your look.

"Why don't you want me to touch you like you do with me?" you ask him intentionally settling better on him causing him to close his eyes and part his lips.

"I think you've already had another first for today. Let's take it slow." he says, "We'll do that too, honey, I promise." he says stroking your bare back in a slow motion that makes you close your eyes.

"I'd like to make you feel as good as you did me," you tell him looking into his eyes, "I don't want to touch you if you don't want to, but now it's your turn. You can't just worry about me, tell me what to do."

"It's… not…" he's about to complain, but you move a little awkwardly on his shaft and he finds himself swallowing, "it's. . . not necessary. . ."

"Joel!" you call back to him, "Really, tell me what to do." you add, this time intentionally touching his intimacy with yours.

"Fuck. . ." he groans closing his eyes, sighing noisily. He places his hands on your hips and moves you back and forth on his bulge, you both moan at that clutch, "Oh, fuck," he groans again gasping as you place your hands on his shoulders continuing to rub against him, "That's so. . . oh, baby, I. . ." his expression is tense, the vein on his neck clearly visible.

"Joel. . . don't stop." you moan as you move closer to him and give him kisses along the vein on his neck, you feel him gasp, move you on him a few more times and then he lets out a long resounding moan that deliciously fills your ears and leads you to encircle his neck with your arms as you too feel you have experienced a second orgasm just in rubbing against his manhood.

You stay like that against each other for a while longer, then you shift and slip on your briefs again, feel his burning gaze follow you, look up and meet his eyes, slip your T-shirt back on and put on a pair of shorts trying to ignore that almost clutching feeling at the pit of your stomach.

"You hungry?" you ask him.

He nods.

"Pancakes? Or ham and eggs?" you offer him.

"Coffee." he replies with a relaxed expression painted on his face.

"You can't have breakfast with just coffee, you know what happens? You get annoying." you look at him with an amused look making him visibly relax "Do you want to wash up first? Shall I give you a hand?"

He looks at you amused, "Nice try."

You blush, "I'm serious. . . I didn't mean anything."

"Then why are ya all flushed?" he asks relaxing completely.

"Because … I'm not used to these allusions, I always hated 'em. Gina, my friend, makes constant allusions to sex, and it always makes me uncomfortable." you confide to him.

"Why?" he asks cocking his head to one side with a small grimace twitching his face.

You sit down next to him, "I always saw sex as something awkward, strange. . . maybe because I didn't know my body, maybe because I never shared a truly intimate moment with another person, and maybe because I looked at sex as something deeply intimate and not to be talked about like that." you confide again "Do you think I'm strange?" you ask turning to him.

"Not at all. I'm a lucky old man." he says "Not everyone approaches sex immediately."

You nod, "Well, would you rather wash first - no innuendo - and then eat?"

"Okay, will you help me?" he asks looking to his side.

"Does it hurt?" you ask as you stand up and help him to his feet.

"A little, I think the painkillers wore off by now," he replies.

"Lean on me," you tell him, encircling his waist with your arm; he smiles at you, "Don't worry."

You help him get to the bathroom, then take off his T-shirt revealing himself in his might, he reveals to you once again his broad torso full of old and new scars and you again stand almost open-mouthed, you are very attracted to that strip of dark hair disappearing into his boxers. You look away feeling yourself flaming again.

"May I ask how you fell and what you were doing in the dark?" you ask as you wash his shoulders paying attention to the recent cuts and bruises present.

"Tess…" he replies with a sigh, shaking his head "she never shuts up." shortly after he adds "I heard that if we didn't complete the work on at least the upstairs by the beginning of next week, we won't going to get paid and I want to get paid because I busted my back on that fucking construction site!" he blurts out "And instead I put my foot wrong and fell with those tools. I'm an old fool." he exclaims with a sigh.

"You're not at all, you wanted to get paid for the hard work! But even if they don't have to pay you this job, though, you'll find another one," you tell him, passing the sponge between his neck and shoulders.

He shakes his head, "I don't know, the truth is maybe I should stop giving myself over to these things and do something else, even though this is what I am." he concludes by lowering his head.

"Joel," you say stopping washing him and squatting down next to him "don't talk like that about yourself, you're 47 years old it's true, but that doesn't mean you have to quit, it's true yours is a dangerous job, but you can still do it. Maybe not open construction sites, you could renovate single-story houses, you could do something a little less dangerous." you tell him abandoning the sponge and stroking his face "Look at me, please" he finally looks up "You're fine like this, you're perfect like this. It happens to everyone to fail, but if for every failure we said I'm not good enough I'd better give up, well we wouldn't live anymore!"

His formerly sad eyes become sweet and serene again, he reaches out a hand to you and caresses one cheek, this contact makes you close your eyes, you surrender to him, as always, whenever you are with him.

"You're sweet, I've always said so."

You smile looking into his eyes, "We need each other, did you see?"

He nods, "I'm taking your advice. Will you take one from me?" you look at him questioningly, "I read that there's in Seattle a contest for new writers, entries are due in June, why don't you sign up?"

A contest for new writers? Oh, it's always been your dream to sign up for a literary contest, but Seattle is so far away. . . so far away from him.

"I know that look," he says making you look up at him, "you don't have to say yes or no right away, think about it. I'd like to know and see you accomplished. I'd like to see a picture of you everywhere that says writer of the year." he says smiley and making you smile "Or maybe see you win the Pulitzer Prize." he adds making you smile nervously as your vision blurs "I don't want you to stay in that ugly, dreary little town, you have so much potential. It would be a shame to waste it over there in a bar or even in a library, I have nothing against people who do those jobs," he tells you, cupping your face and caressing your cheeks with his thumbs, "but I wouldn't want you to do that forever. You have a unique mind, you're brilliant, you're smart, you're too much to be confined only to yourself." you're crying, you can't hold back the tears anymore "Maybe someday someone might come and make some documentary about you and who knows they'll do some interviews around and they'll interview me too and I'll say I know her, I met the wonderful woman who's driving everybody crazy."

"Stop it," you tell him sobbing and hiding your face in your hands.

He calls you gently pulling you to him to hug you, you hide your face in the crook of his neck heedless of getting wet yourself. He holds you tightly to him, his hands caress your back, "'s okay, honey, 's okay." he says kissing your forehead, your cheek, your neck, your lips.

The truth is, you don't want to fulfill your dream if you know you have to leave him.

You surrender into his kisses, into his strong arms holding you to him trying to push that thought away as much as possible because, for you, it's not acceptable.

A/N Thank you for your support, for your likes and reblog, thank you, thank you, thank you ❤️If you enjoyed this, please consider reblogging and leaving comments 🫶 if you don't like it don't be rude and keep going. 😉 Please remember English is not my first language, so please be merciful! 🙏 The girl in the gif has the purpose to represent the situation only 🙂

[brucewaynehater101]

Recently my mind has been plagued with ideas about things Tim could be other than human and what would both fit him and make an interesting story. I believe I might have found something that suits him rather well.

Tim has always been a strange child, always silent and always watching. Learning everything he can about everyone he has to interact with so that he can best make sure every interaction goes in his favor. He learned his manipulation from his Mother after all. She was the very best at it so he will be the very best too. She nor his "father" have watched over him since he was very small, after all they are creatures that do not raise their own young. Her returning to see him every few months, teaching him how to hide what he is and how to defend himself, *and* making sure he has food and shelter is far, far more than most of his species could ever even dream of. Janet is their version of Best Mom In The Universe, even if she's horrifyingly neglectful by Human Standards.

As for how Jack treats Tim, he doesn't. After all, once they were married and she had everything, she didn't need him anymore. Jack died before Tim was even conceived and the current Jack is nothing more than a husk, a living puppet that his mother walks around with as a shield to keep herself safe from prying eyes and questions. Perfect for keeping her cover as Just A Human. She has taught Tim how to do this same thing using small animals from the garden (and making sure he eats them after. He's still a growing boy who needs to eat after all) si that one day he can have a few living puppets of his own.

Tim does not tell anyone he isn't human, as per his mother's instructions. After all, he shares quite a few traits with a type of creature that humans *hate* and actively go out of their way to kill. Well, most do.

As he grows and ages as Robin, he never let's anything slip, he can't afford to let them know. He knows that Bruce doesn't trust magic in Gothem (or at least, Tim thinks that's the truth) and even if he did, the others have shown a distaste for the creature that he shares so much with. Especially Alfred and Dick, the later of which he has verbally claimed to *hate*. Given, one of them was in his hair when he yelled this but it still stung quite deeply and Alfred works hard to make sure that not a single trace of them can be found anywhere in the manor, even scolding Tim once for letting so much proof of their existence pile up in the corners of his room. But Tim doesn't blame him either, Alfred's job is to keep the house clean after all.

Eventually he must come clean though and what a way it is. Bruce has been working a case with Constantine about people going missing in Gothem. Turns out, everyone who has was some kind of magical creature and the people doing it are likely poachers. The others have been informed of the case so that they can report anything they know or anyone they know who could be a target. Tim doesn't say anything, instead keeping a closer eye on those he does know. He would never, ever sell out another creature. He would rather die.

A week later, an attempted raid on the poachers goes wrong and ends up with Jason, Tim, Bruce, and Damian all captured by the poachers. Tim is the last to wake up and when he does, the poachers are discussing what kind of undead Jason is, scanning the tied up vigilante with a device that simply says again, "subject, magical. Type, undead. Futher information, unknown."

At this point Tim realizes he's the only one not tied up. He's also the only one in a cage. He tries to pretend to be asleep but the one watching him says, "look who's awake. You know, we had bets on how many of you Bats were part of the magical community. Seems like I won the bet since only you and Red Hood over there are. Don't bother trying to lie your way out, our scanner can see through your Glamor spell, no matter how powerful it is. And this?" They hold up a small remote control with about a dozen buttons on it, "this does a wonderful little thing where it makes a specific pitch at a specific volume that causes Magical Creatures to drop their Glamor Spells or Shifts. Luckily it's nothing more than mildly annoying to humans."

A button is pressed before anyone can ask questions and the remove makes a loud, buzzing sound. It's not painful for the trio who are tied up, but Tim? Tim is shaking and writhing and *screaming* with both hands pressed over his ears. He is rolling back and forth across the ground as he screams for the person to stop, just *stop*. Bruce is almost free when he freezes upon realizing something. There aren't two tear tracks on his sons face. There's a lot. A pair of eyes have opened on his cheek bones and above his eyebrows and a smaller pair between them. Tim has gotten much paler and his canines have turned long and sharp like his nails. Tim rolls onto his stomach and curls up as best he can, screaming as there is a cracking sound. A long spindly, spider like leg shoots out of his side and slams into the floor, curling up in pain like the rest of Tim's limbs.

When the device is finally turned off, Tim is laying on his side, wheezing in pain and his legs are gone. In their place is the body of a giant spider which has sharp points at the tips of its legs instead of the regular spider feet. Tim has 8 eyes and is totally limp as he tries to recover. The Poacher simply laughs, "A Jorōgumo, a real master of puppets you are. But weak without them. God, your kind is so rare, you'll fetch us the price of at least 4 normal monsters. Add in you're a famous vigilante and we could break a few million dollars off *just* you."

Tim glares weakly at them and hisses softly. He knows the numbers are true. It's the secondary reason he never told anyone. He knew he would either get squished or sold off. How he just needs to figure out how to escape from Gothem before Bruce can confront him on this. He doesn't want to explain.

Aww... was he collecting little spiders and getting upset when his family kept expressing their hatred/distaste for them? Did he have to hear them talk about how creepy their eyes are, their weird abundance of legs, and how disgusting their overall being is before he excused himself to stare in a mirror and compare the similarities?

Does he dare to meet their eyes after the reveal, or does he fear finding the look of revulsion?

Also, would he find comfort in knitting, crochet, and weaving? Is his house full of hand-made blankets?

Anyways, enjoyed what you have and would definitely read more

[shineonyoucrazyyandere]

Which joestar do you think would be the worst yandere? And why

Pick your poison! I like to think the Joestar’s all have their little traits that shine the most based on their personality (so whose the worst can depend on what you’re uncomfortable with). Going to do just the og verse jojo’s for this 1-6.

Jonathan : Very sweet almost intoxicatingly so, but he tends to end up a bit overprotective/just a bit babying. Insisting he does things for you, if you have some issue somewhere else? Why not let him resolve it. Don’t fret over too much he has the means to take care of you. There might be a time or two your room might be locked if you’re a little more stubborn than usual

Joseph: What is this thing called “personal space” ? It almost sounds like a foreign language to this man. He totally didn’t mess certain things up so you happen to meet up with him. Not sure why your date stood you up? He couldn’t possibly give an answer other than they’re not worth your time since they didn’t bother showing up. He should take you to this great place he loves going to after a long day.

Jotaro: Stalking type usually, and mows past anything that he might feel gets in the way of you and himself. He’s used to punks, so he’s not afraid to pummel someone if they don’t get the message to scram. When it comes to classes, he’s glancing at you every so often, maybe there’s a “doodle” or two in his notebook. Need to walk somewhere? He’ll walk with you. If you’re hiding out to be alone, he ends up finding you. You’re probably the reason he learns any building’s layout in the first place. Clubs or class cleaning doesn’t stop Jotaro either, he’ll wait as long as it takes. Being sick at home doesn’t stop him either, usually there’s some kind of hot soup/dish that’s good to eat while sick sitting in your room somehow. (Not to mention potential kidnapping later down the line if you’re not really cooperating)

Later Parts like 4 and 6, he’s pretty similar in dropping you off things even if you never once told him your address. (He has a decent memory of these things). Similarly Jotaro has any phone numbers you have in his contacts, and he’ll have a talk personally with anyone that he isn’t fond of approaching you. He tends to have you in the back of his mind while out on his studies, or writing a paper, and yet again drawings somewhere he’s compelled to place them. Every so often he checks in on you (whether you want this or not doesn’t matter). Broken down car? It’s either replaced swiftly or he’s driving you places himself. Maybe he somehow (forces) nudges you to live with him.

Josuke : He’s head over heels for you, and similar to Joseph he’s going to take any opportunity to squeeze himself into your life. He just so happens to have some leftover lunch from that place you like? You looked sad when they had sold out of your favorite meal there, so why doesn’t he help with that? Speaking of, maybe your eyes are drifting somewhere else. He steals any potential love letters to a crush and rewrites them, making it look like you’re confessing to him. He may also leave one of your favorite treats you like in its place. It’s an enigma to you how he found that out.

Giorno : He’s the don of the Italian mafia, he’s almost constantly worried about you. So if he has eyes on you, it’s almost immediate you lose autonomy whether born in Italy or a tourist. He’s clever in his ways to trap you, whether you’re resistant or not doesn’t matter. (he does think you’re cute with a strong head on your shoulders). There’s some of that charisma he possess all the same just like his father. Even if it doesn’t work on you, it makes others around you to trap you easily. Giorno likes to think he gives you a lot of leeway with voluntarily coming to him. He’ll meet you casually in coffee shops or wherever you’re willing to shop at. The bill is covered without you having to say a word. Any cash you used is miraculously brought back to you somehow. The blond isn’t afraid to get his hands a little dirty however when it comes to you. If he has to take something for you to step into his arms (whether it’s your ability to walk around outside or someone close to you) he’ll do whatever it takes.

Jolyne : Sure she stalks somewhat, but like her father she can be bold in taking care of the competition. She’s not afraid to hold your hand or finding a way for you two to do so. Eavesdropping is something she does occasionally, and anyone that wants to stomp on your heart is going to get stomped themselves. She does delay you with stone free (or outright captures you) if Jolyne doesn’t want you to leave. It’s impossible to shake her off, no matter what you try to do. Of course she made a copy of your apartment key, what if there’s an emergency? Maybe she wanted to make you breakfast. Huh? What do you mean she can’t just walk in unannounced? Don’t be ridiculous.

[auspicioustidings]

Flinch

Summary: You thought you would die trying the day you tried to escape your abusive husband, but destiny has other plans. Words: 5.2k TWs: domestic abuse, rape

(I read this book months ago, forgot all about it and today it burrowed into my head again and I assume caused this so if you wanna read a good version of this concept I'd recommend it!)

You would die trying today. You had to. 

The 20 week scan had been yesterday and while your husband was away on a work trip he would return this evening. You knew your bodyguard had already told him that the baby inside you was a girl. He did not want a girl. You shook at the memory of when he left 3 days ago.

He had taken you on your hands and knees, no less cruel in how he did it than before you were pregnant, and told you about how his son would be his legacy. His hot, wet breath had been in your ear as he spilled inside of you. You’d better give me a son, wife. If you misbehave and grow a female I’ll need to fuck myself into your womb to get rid of the little slut and try again.

The baby had saved you the most severe beatings the last 4 months, but your husband found other ways to torture you. You could barely even look at your guard anymore knowing that he had been witness to the week your husband had made you spend in an open room penned in by glass. It had been a luxurious prison cell where everybody could see your every move, the bathroom facilities not hidden from view at all and your body on full display. He said it was so they could make sure you were healthy and happy during your pregnancy and then he had fucked your arse in front of his men and smacked you hard across the cheek when he was finished for being such a cry baby. 

He would certainly beat you black and blue for failing to bear him a son. But you didn’t really care about that, you had agreed to be his wife 6 years ago when you were 17 and thought he had hung the stars. But this baby who at first you had hated you had come to love. He would kill her. He would kill any of her sisters after her. You could take any punishment he gave you, maybe you’d get lucky and he’d finally kill you, but your daughter deserved a chance to live. 

So you would do something you had not done since your 3rd attempt 5 years ago had ended with broken ribs, a broken nose and a concussion that had made you dizzy and sick for months after. You were going to try and leave. 

It would be difficult. Your guard was loyal to your husband and never flinched at his treatment of you, so you did not expect help from him. Your left leg hadn’t quite healed right after it had been hurt a few weeks ago during a particularly rough fulfilment of your marital duties so you couldn’t put weight on it very well. 

Plus you knew you were ugly now. Your eyes had sunken in and were smudged underneath with purple from too many sleepless nights. One side of your face was mottled with bruises. The rest of your body was too thin but for your protruding stomach and covered in marks. You remembered your father yelling at you about beauty being the only thing women were worth when you were a child. Your parents had been happy when you got engaged to such a wealthy man and you had not heard from them since the day they handed you over. You had been pretty then. You wondered how disgusted your father would be with how you looked now. He certainly wouldn’t help you in such a state.

There wasn’t much time. Your guard was stuck to your side but for one hour in the afternoon where you were expected to thoroughly clean yourself and prepare yourself for your husband's return. The rules of that never changed regardless of your condition. You would spend the hour making yourself perfect, your holes clean and ready, your skin soft and fragrant, your hair braided how he liked it and a thin nightgown perfectly draping on your body. If he found fault with you then you could expect a great deal of pain before he brought in his men to redo the whole process. It was not pleasant when they did it. 

The fear made your mouth dry. Not only would you be punished for trying to escape, but you would be found lacking in your appearance and preparation and that would carry its own punishment. You could not do this.

A kick from your daughter argued that you could and it spurred you into action. This was it, your last chance to save her. 

–

“I’m gaggin’ for a pint.”

Ghost snorted a laugh.

“You’re always gagging for something Johnny” he quipped, Gaz elbowing Soap teasingly while Price just rolled his eyes from behind the wheel.

“You’ll behave back there. This truck has a no gagging on anything rule in place. Bunch of bloody moppets” he barked.

The Captain was mostly just glad to be heading back home. Some therapist would have a field day with him considering home to be a small off-the-record safe house on the edges of a tiny fishing village, but then he was sure they would quit long before he had gotten to that part with the amount of shite he had been through. 

His team had their own flats dotted around the UK, but they seemed to prefer to spend most of their down time together in the safe house. Maybe one day they would all admit that the safe house was just their actual house now, but it was unlikely to be anytime soon. It was still spartan after all, looking drab from the outside and as regimented and dull as any other military base on the inside. Not really homey. Garrick had sincerely attempted to start a little vegetable garden last year but it had been a resounding failure, meaning the little cottage was surrounded by weeds that choked the path. At this point the locals probably thought it was haunted. 

It was still a long way off. Two more hours to base where they could switch out the army issued truck for his own modern and well kept pick up and MacTavish’s frankly ridiculous little hatchback that should really not be able to handle the country roads leading to the safe house but was somehow still kicking. He swore he was some sort of car witch.

“Don’t worry Captain, I’m too classy to have a gag reflex!” Gaz shouted over to him with Soap snickering in the background.

“That right? Lieutenant.”

Price laughed at the carnage happening in the back of the truck as Ghost pounced on Gaz and tried to shove fingers down his throat to get him to gag while Soap took Gaz’s side as he almost always did when it came to a fight with Ghost and tried to fight him off. The rough housing in the back at least kept them occupied for a little bit while Price lit up a cigar.

He wasn’t paying as much attention to the road as he ought to, but then this stretch of road was almost always empty. They were more or less in the middle of nowhere, the nearest civilisation being some fancy gated community out past the right side of the forest this road cut through. 

Only 5 hours to go now and at least 3 of those would be done in his much more comfortable truck with climate control and not this tin can. 

Ghost chuckled as Johnny grabbed at Gaz’s top, trying to pull him back into the truck as Ghost was shoving him out. Poor Gaz’s top half was dangling precariously out the back and he could barely breathe through the wheezing laughter. Ghost was someone with fast instincts, so he felt Gaz tense and was immediately on guard even before the man yelled out and started scrambling to launch himself out of the back of the truck and onto the road before Price had a chance to properly stop the thing. 

“Stop the truck!”

“Bloody hell, Garrick get your arse back in here!” Price yelled and cursed as he brought the truck to a stop a little ahead of where Gaz had jumped out.

Ghost had a hand locked around Soap’s nape, the Lieutenant knowing if he didn’t keep the man grounded he would be out of this truck and by Gaz’s side without even stopping to check for danger. Price trusted him enough that he stayed put, watching the two of them who were watching out the back to see what Garrick did.

–

There was a man on the road. You were so sore and so tired, your adrenaline nearly exhausted. You had gotten so close, the road was right there. But he was one of your husband's you thought. Not one you recognised, but the casual clothes with military gear was just like your guards. 

The choice now was how hard to fight. It hardly felt like you could fight anymore, but somewhere in the woods you had made the decision that you were not going back. Better you die with your daughter than allow her to die alone. You hoped this man was ruthless and efficient about it, that he made this quick. You had to make sure he killed you. You were not going back. 

“Hey, it’s ok, I’m not going to hurt you. My name’s Kyle and I can help. Are you hurt?”

He sounded painfully kind and that felt unfair. It had been so long since you had been afforded kindness, why now? Maybe this was your last meal. 

“I- I won’t go back” you said, screwing up your courage and trying to stand as straight and strong as you could with the exhaustion and pain blanketing your body. 

The man slowly moved one hand to take off his cap while the other was stretched open in front of him. He was showing you he wasn’t armed you thought as his cap was put on the ground and he raised his other hand to show it was also empty and crouched a little lower than his full height. 

“Ok, I’m not going to make you go back anywhere. I just want to help” he said, gentle.

Throughout the years you had learned not to trust. When you were 10 and your mother had promised you a birthday party but then spent the money on a night out to the pub for her and your father instead. When you got your first period and you asked your father what you should do but he just smacked you for telling him something so disgusting. When your husband promised he would be gentle on your wedding night and it wouldn’t hurt, but he broke both promises. When a maid promised to help you escape but instead told your guard your plan. Your husband had fucked her in front of you while you were laying unable to move from the beating. You had never seen him be so gentle.

You so wanted to trust someone and not have it backfire. Just once. Just enough to give you some hope that your daughter could have a good life with people who would look out for her. But when he shuffled a little closer you flinched and stepped back. It was too hard to try and trust him. 

The movement put you more in the dappled early evening sunlight. It would be dark soon. 

– 

Kyle fought to keep himself relaxed even when the light revealed what he had missed before. The scared woman in front of him was pregnant. Couldn’t have been very far along with how small she was. Her face was a mess of bruises. He wanted to hunt down whatever useless piece of shit had done this to her. 

But he had to stay calm for her sake. He couldn’t start demanding information when he hadn't even managed to get close enough to examine her. He needed to get her far away from the danger first, get her medical attention and then get justice once she was happy and healthy and safe. 

It also needed to be quick. This was a woman who was running, so it stood to reason there was somebody chasing. But how did he convince her to get into a truck with a bunch of armed strangers?

She startled, looking like she had seen… ah fuck, Ghost had hopped out of the truck and walked over.

“You know how to use a gun?” he asked her, almost casual despite the grit behind it.

She shook her head and her eyes widened as Ghost lifted his sidearm into his hands. Kyle thought perhaps his Lieutenant had lost his damn mind when he started calmly explaining the basics of the gun before stepping forward, putting it on the ground and stepping back again.

“Sergeant, back up” he ordered and Kyle reluctantly took a few steps back. “You need help and we can give it. You pick up that gun, get in the truck and if any of us touches you without your permission you point and shoot. We’re about two hours out from a military base, there’s a doctor there who can check you over, make sure the baby is ok.”

Maybe Ghost was a genius or maybe he was a maniac, but then it wasn’t the first time he had flirted with that line. Kyle watched the woman hesitantly move forward. She reminded him of a little mouse approaching a piece of cheese. When she got close enough she darted suddenly and grabbed the gun, holding it up to them. Her arms were shaking.

He was used to the sounds of a bullet firing by now, but he still felt himself jump when she fired out into the woods on the other side of them.

“Y-you actually gave me a loaded gun?” she said breathlessly, seeming almost outraged that Ghost would truly do such a thing. Kyle sympathised.

“You feel better?” Ghost answered, nodding his head to the truck where Soap was watching with rapt attention. 

“...yes” the woman said before walking (although he noted it was more limping) over to the truck and letting Ghost help her in only after trying herself and realising she wouldn’t be able to hop up and keep ahold of the gun at the same time. 

–

The man in the skull mask didn’t ask any questions and he seemed entirely nonplussed about the gun pointed at him as the eerily silent truck took off. The other two in the back seemed nervous and the man driving hadn’t interacted with you at all, instead keeping his attention on the road. 

Skull mask made a call and his voice sounded like a shout with how quiet it was.

“I need you at Stirling Lines in 2 hours… yeah, needs to be you for this… send me the standard form and I’ll get the answers over to you… she doesn’t need delicate from me, she needs help… thanks for this, see you then.”

The one that shared a bench on your side with the mohawk looked increasingly alarmed at the conversation. 

“LT…” he started, some worried warning in his tone. 

The LT ignored him, looked at his phone and then looked up to you after seemingly finding what he was looking for. 

“Name, gender and birth date?”

“I… what?”

“Jesus Christ LT!”

“I need to get information for the nurse I have meeting us at base” the LT said, ignoring the mohawk man’s outrage and staring at you with those unsettling eyes sunken behind the mask. “The questions are going to be invasive. The exam is going to be worse and it’s going to take hours.”

“That’s enough Lieutenant” the man driving hissed, only to be equally as ignored as the Lieutenant's eyes stayed on you.

“Get through it. Get through it to spite the bastard.”

You felt a flutter of panic try to take hold. Your adrenaline was gone so it was hard to even feel that, but he thought… they all thought you had been raped. 

“It’s not… I’m married” you said by way of explanation. 

The atmosphere was tense, but after you said that there was a distinct feeling of sadness coming from mohawk and Kyle, a feeling of pity. The skull mask had no such pity emanating from him. 

“He told you that because you’re married you couldn’t say no. Reinforced that. It’s brainwashing and you can break that. It wasn’t marriage they used as a reason for me, but they tried to brainwash me to think I consented to it just the same. I didn’t and neither did you. Spite the bastard.”

Nobody else spoke for the next 2 hours but you and the man in the skullmask. He asked questions and you answered them. At the start you took time to answer, hesitant from the humiliation coursing through you and making you feel sick. An hour in and you had no emotions left to give, only cold answers that floated through the truck and hung in the air like the twisted body of the saviour had hung on your bedroom wall, watching and judging. 

By the time the truck was pulling through to a base you felt rinsed of everything, numb. The only shred of warmth came from the hand holding yours and you could not remember exactly when the man with the mohawk had put it there. 

–

“Simon…”

“It’s not like you hadn’t read my file sir.”

Price had read his file. He knew what Roba had done to this man. It didn’t make it any less jarring to hear his Lieutenant say it out loud in the back of a damn truck with a strange beaten woman and his two Sergeants who until now had no real idea of his past.

“You solid?” he asked, not wanting to push him to talk about anything he didn’t want to. 

“I’m angry.”

He knew that from Simon’s record too. It had taken a while for him to be cleared after Roba because he was so angry all the time, his aggression too volatile for even the military. This whole situation was bringing up old wounds in his Lieutenant and he was lost with what to do about it. 

“Lieutenant Riley” came a call from the nurse finally leaving the exam room. She had an American accent, Southern. He suspected she was probably the one who saw Simon after Roba considering that had been in Texas.

“Appreciate you coming on short notice” Simon replied with a nod of thanks. 

“Consider it payback for getting me my visa. No point in mincing words, it’s bad.”

“Consider it a matter of national security” Price said.

Technically he shouldn’t be told anything about the state of the woman in that exam room without her consent, but then it would not be the first time he got around GDPR citing national security. The nurse was clearly versed in how the military worked and handed over the clipboard she was holding. Simon read along with him over his shoulder.

“Bleeding Christ. She’s 21 weeks?” he asked, shocked.

“Long term malnutrition. She wasn’t given any control over her food. They gave her enough to keep her alive, but nowhere near healthy.”

“This…” Simon started, looking at the results from the x-rays.

“Consistent with prolonged torture. Some of the breaks never healed right. She’s still healing from a fracture and some ligament tearing in the left leg, a few broken ribs and a crack in her orbital bone. She said he had been more careful with her since finding out she was pregnant.”

Price swore loudly. He saw plenty of civilian casualties. He had caused the deaths of innocent people in the pursuit of saving other innocents. He was no stranger to evil. But this wasn’t a terrorist attack. It wasn’t a hostage in a facility. The woman was just an ordinary person who was being tortured for no large cause, not for the advancement of some twisted doctrine. She was being tortured for the crime of being a wife.

“Can you keep it off record?” 

He was a bit taken aback that Simon was asking that. Surely they wanted this on record? But then he followed that action to its conclusion. They found her near a community that very rich people lived in, it followed that this husband had money to spare. They would know she was missing by now and they would know the radius of where she could have reached by car or train. 

The second she was admitted to a hospital as a malnourished and beaten pregnant woman she would go missing. He wouldn’t trust the police as far as he could throw them to protect a domestic abuse victim when the perpetrator was rich and powerful enough to track her down and pay them off. The military wasn’t any better. Hell he knew of monsters in his own department who would insist on taking her for a spin before handing her over. 

“I’ll talk with her” he said, Simon giving him a grateful nod. 

Somehow he needed to convince that woman that she was coming to the safehouse with them until they could deal with her husband along with every single one of his accomplices. They wouldn’t make it to prison.

–

You wanted so badly to sleep but the alarm in your head wouldn’t let you. You couldn’t possibly be safe. You were never safe. 

The nurse had been kind in her examination. She said this was specifically what she was trained for, that you were not alone. Others had been through this and survived. Others had went on to have brilliant and bright lives while their attackers had turned into insignificant, small creatures in their memories. You still found it hard to think of your husband as your attacker. All you had known growing up was that the man of the household owned the women in it and it was his prerogative how he handled them.

You hadn’t been allowed to shower first even though you wanted to. It was strange to think that it was deemed lucky that you weren’t permitted to shower outside of your hour preparation time and that you hadn’t been given that hour since your husband had last used you for his pleasure. He knew you desperately hated having to lay with his spend inside of you. You had begged your guard to let you clean up properly before getting your ultrasound, but he had only smiled as he said no. Of course he had. He was well versed in experiencing your humiliation and your husband was well versed in creating situations for him to do so. 

It was painful when she had examined you internally. She told you that it shouldn’t be, that you associated penetration with pain now so your body was seizing up making the speculum feel much worse than it normally would. She apologised, said that was something that wouldn’t happen forever once you got healthier and knew you were safe. You could hardly believe it when she told you sex wasn’t supposed to hurt for women.

You hadn’t thought you were capable of it after today, but you still cried when she did the ultrasound. There she was, still alive and well. You wanted to tell her it would be ok now, that you had done it, you had gotten away and she would be safe. But it didn’t seem real.

The exam had taken such a long time. Your clothes had been taken from you and the thin gown did nothing to make you feel less exposed. She wanted to take the bank notes stuffed into your pocket as well, promising that they would be replaced, but you had begged to keep them and she had let you. The MRI wasn’t mentioned when the nurse had first explained everything, but part way through she had asked if it would be ok for one to be taken. She made sure that you didn’t have to interact with anyone else but her which calmed you a little. 

Now you were alone. She told you that she would let you gather your thoughts and then a shower and clothes could be organised.

You needed to figure out your next move. £410 wasn’t a lot of money, but it would have to be enough to get your daughter somewhere safe. You could work. Your last job had been as a waitress when you were a teenager, but you were good at cooking and cleaning and willing to learn just about anything so you were determined you would find something. You didn’t have much choice. 

There was a knock at the door and you told them to come in. Your voice sounded awful, scratchy and hoarse. 

It was not the nurse. 

The man from the front of the car didn’t look at you unkindly, but it did not stop you from flinching as he stepped towards you. You wished you hadn’t let Kyle take the gun from you when you arrived. 

He immediately stopped and showed his hands just like Kyle had on the road. 

“My name is Captain John Price, the men in the truck are my team. You’ve been brave today and I know it’s been hard. I can get you a shower and some hot food, how does that sound?”

You felt yourself shrivel and shrink. A shower with him. You hated being in a shower with your husband, he always forced you to your knees. Whenever he gave you a chance to breathe it was only under the high pressure spray of the water and it made you feel like you were suffocating. He liked that. 

Could you get on your knees for this man? If it was for your daughter, if it kept her safe, then yes. It wasn’t so bad was it? You had survived worse. It was just your mouth. 

You stood shakily and nodded, eyes fixed on the ground as you picked up the bank notes on the side table and held them tightly in your hand. 

“Where did that come from?”

“I…” you started, taking a moment to try and think of a lie before giving in to the mental exhaustion and just telling the truth. “I stole it from my guard’s wallet.”

“Atta girl.”

The praise made your ears feel hot. You had half expected to be arrested on the spot, but the man, Captain John Price, just started leading you out of the room and down the hall to the showers. 

“Soap, that’s the moppet with the mohawk from the truck, volunteered some of his things. He’s a bit of a peacock, so there should be everything you need. It’s a communal shower but I’ll stand guard at the door for you so nobody will come in. You can lock the door, but if I knock I need you to answer so I can confirm you’re ok. Towels are here, clothes here. We don’t have anything for maternity so we’ve guessed on what size will fit.”

You were taken aback. He wasn’t going to be in here with you. You didn’t need to service him. Your grip tightened around the cash in your hand before loosening as you looked at it. 

“Don’t even think about it. You don’t owe anyone here a damn thing. Go shower.”

With that he left. You locked the door and waited for 10 minutes to see if he would unlock it from the other side and come in. He only knocked once and when you responded that you were fine he was silent again. 

Satisfied that at least you didn’t think he would come in you stripped off and finally had a shower. The hair products and shower gel left by Soap (you thought that was a funny coincidence) smelled nice, like pine and maybe a hint of something sweet. Your husband only ever let you use things with a heavy smell of roses.

The nurse had asked what you meant by preparing yourself when you mentioned that you hadn’t done so and escaped instead. She told you that you didn’t need to do that here, but then there wasn’t any of the equipment you were used to anyway. It felt luxurious in a way, to clean yourself just for yourself. 

The next time Captain Price knocked and you confirmed that you were ok, he kept speaking with you. 

“I would like you to come with me and my team. We are heading to a safehouse a few hours from here and it’ll be the safest place for you to recover. You would have your own room with a lock on the door.”

You were glad nobody could see the way your face screwed up in some grotesque mixture of fear, confusion and, worst of all, hope. 

“I… have money. I can pay rent.”

“...ok.”

He sounded somewhat reluctant to accept that but you couldn’t not pay for this. You would constantly be waiting for one of them to collect in some other way if you didn’t give them cash. 

You touched your stomach, silently asking your daughter if it was ok to trust this man. She gave a kick. 

–

Johnny didn’t think he had ever seen anyone so fragile. She had fought it Price had said, but eventually their new housemate had fallen into an exhausted sleep in the passenger seat of his truck. 

When they arrived it had been him who bundled her in his arms and carried her to bed. God she was so small for someone who was supposed to be halfway through a pregnancy.

He had watched her since Gaz had jumped out of that truck. She had flinched then, she had flinched when Si got out of the truck, she had flinched when Price had went into the room (he probably shouldn’t have been hiding out in the hallway watching through the open door, but he just couldn’t stop himself). 

She hadn’t flinched at all when he threaded his fingers through hers in the truck. Her hand was so tiny. Too tiny, much like the rest of her.

He put her to bed in his room since the spare was a bit of a wreck and he bunked with Gaz. They could sort it all out tomorrow after he had gotten her a massive breakfast. He was shite at cooking anything but a greasy fry up but he wanted only the best for her, so he’d already fired off a message to the girl who owned the best cafe in town and asked for a priority breakfast delivery that he was going to be paying a fortune for since it was last minute and out of the ordinary. 

He didn’t know this woman, but he knew intrinsically that he would.

–

You dreamt sweet dreams. A cottage made cosy. Cooking whatever meals you wanted with ingredients you grew yourself in the garden outside. The gentle pleasure of careful hands and tongues, opening you up to a new world you never thought existed, one where your pleasure was first and foremost and the press of a body into yours didn’t hurt. The give beneath your fingers when you touched your own body, fat and soft rolls that reminded you of how safe you felt, how happy and healthy you were. 

And a little girl running towards a returning hero, being swept up and laughing delightedly about it. 

Best of all in that wonderful dream, you didn’t flinch once. 

[lucid-loves]

First Light ~ Simon "Ghost" Riley Part 6

Pairing: bodyguard!Ghost x princess!reader (fem!reader)

Word Count: 3.2k

CW: angst, violence, blood, strong language, scars, verbal abuse by parents, physical abuse by parents, psychological abuse by parents, opposites attract, forbidden love, slow burn, fluff, attraction and sexual tension, reader POV and ghost POV, minors DNI, smut, virgin reader, praising, kisses, porn

Let me know if I missed any CWs.

Story Synopsis: After receiving death threats from a mysterious terrorist organization, your royal parents make a decision to reach out to the United States for help. Specifically, they want the US to send a bodyguard to protect their precious princess. When the 141 is called upon to investigate, Ghost is the one assigned to protect you. With your lack of experiences outside of your royal life and his experience with nothing but deadly, worldly affairs, opposites attract.

Chapter Synopsis: Ever since the kiss you shared with your bodyguard, your imagination has been running wild with naughty fantasies and curiosities. You decide to learn more on your own, but Ghost is willing to teach you himself. (SMUT ALERT) 

Part 1 ~ Part 2 ~ Part 3 ~ Part 4 ~ Part 5 ~ Part 6

Ghost stared intensely at the report that was just sent his way from his team. Gaz had managed to catch the tagger from the farmer’s market. Interrogation led to their real identity, some associates, and a map marking the other spots that intended to be staked out by the group. And all of this was really thanks to you for noticing the tagger fleeing the scene. If you weren’t so observant, they wouldn’t have made as much progress with this investigation as they have. 

Hopefully, it wouldn’t take long for more terrorists to be caught. If progress continued this smoothly, then it wouldn’t take long for the 141 to be done with this job. Then again, the sooner that this job ended, the sooner he would have to say goodbye to you.

The torn lieutenant looked up from his seat at the dining kitchen towards the living room. He was looking at the back of your head, hair up in that hair clip you seem to adore, wrapped up in a good book that you found around the safehouse. Luckily, the safehouse was decently stocked with things for you to do. It was never difficult finding a way to entertain yourself while Ghost worked. 

Neither you nor Ghost have brought up the kiss. You thought it would be hard meeting his gaze after that kiss followed by what you so naughtily did privately in your bedroom. And it was. Every time you thought about him, your heart threatened to leap from your chest. Butterflies went haywire in your stomach. It was only your training as a princess that you were able to keep up with appearances. 

Not that you weren’t thinking about so much more in that curious head of yours in your moments of refinement. Every now and then your mind would wander towards more naughty thoughts. If that was how a kiss felt, how good would it feel to go further? To have his kisses pepper your neck down to your breasts. To feel his large, warm hands against your bare, electrified skin. To have his fingers trace down your spine and make you shiver. 

Little did you know that Ghost was having the same thoughts as you.

He was also struggling with completely getting the kiss out of his mind. How perfect it felt to have your body press against his. How sweet you tasted on his tongue. How quick he seemed to get aroused just from kissing you alone. He wanted to take it further not just physically, but emotionally as well. He’s grown rather attached to you since the day he realized that you were more than just a princess and a mission. 

Ghost wanted you to be his completely. But he knew that that would be a huge mistake.

The both of you were like polar opposites. Ghost came from a world of gunfire while you came from the world of champagne glasses. He could offer you safety, but never security. Not with his job. While he did his best to stay alive, he never knew if one day could be his last. You didn’t deserve to live with that on your shoulders. 

A quiet sigh was suppressed as Ghost got up from his seat. Slowly, he strolled over to you and put a hand on your shoulder, gently pulling your attention away from your book. You knew that he was approaching, though. It was like you developed super senses when it came to his presence now. 

“Gonna go check the perimeter. You okay staying here?” You enthusiastically hummed in response, not wanting him to worry too much about leaving you alone for a moment. Your bodyguard has been frequently going outside the safehouse to check the perimeter. It was part of his job, however, you were quick to understand that it was to also get some fresh air. 

When you finally heard the sound of the front door clicking shut, you closed your book and grabbed the remote to the television. Today was the day you were going to watch something incredibly new today. Something you have been curious about before and have grown even more curious about since your feelings for Ghost grew. 

You were going to look at porn for the first time. 

With a time limit of about twenty minutes, you planned to make every second count. Nothing too crazy. Just the basics. Just enough time to see what all the fuss is about and hopefully learn something new. Smut within books every now and then have been enjoyable to read. Though watching videos of the real thing was sure to feel different than reading words on a page to imagine in your head. 

Quickly, you connected to the protected internet on the television and pulled up what was trending on a major porn channel that was listed first in your search. Without hesitation, the channel offered videos upon videos of explicit content. Your eyes widened and your heart quickened at the crude thumbnails depicting all sorts of actions. A harsh heat reddened your cheeks, embarrassed by what you saw. Yet, you couldn’t look away.

It was fascinating to you how many options there actually were. This was just the first channel you came across too. There seemed to be porn for just about anything. Scrolling through, you felt your blood continue to heat up. A subtle, sweet tingle between your legs began as you examined the thumbnails closer. Most of the videos being offered depicted actors that seemed to be enjoying themselves, job or not.

Did sex really feel that good?

Ensuring that the television was on mute, you opened a video up at random and observed. There was kissing. Deep kissing like the ones you shared with your bodyguard just a few days ago. Things became more hot and heavy once the actors began to strip. 

You gasped at all the touching and groping the stars did to each other. How excited the beautiful woman looked as her partner kissed down her body. Squeezing your thighs tightly together, you tried not to get too swept up in becoming aroused yourself just from watching. 

There was no doubt about it, though. You were getting wet. Your brain was replacing the actors with you and Ghost too. Lightheadedness came over you as your body burned with lust. No wonder why everyone was so obsessed with porn. 

You took a quick glance at the clock and turned the television off, deciding that it was best for you to move to your private bedroom. There was still time before Ghost would come back from his perimeter check, so that meant you had time to calm yourself down before he noticed anything amiss. 

After entering your bedroom and closing the door, you hesitantly slipped your hand down your pants to check yourself.

And of course, you were soaked. 

You knew you shouldn’t be embarrassed since this kind of thing was Taking a deep breath, you moved to the bed to try to relieve yourself before your bodyguard returned. The last thing you wanted was for him to walk in on a sight you wouldn’t be able to explain away.

~

Ghost took a big whiff of fresh air, letting the clean air refresh his brain. His perimeter checks have been mostly for keeping his thoughts straight. It was hard to keep them organized when he was within your sweet presence. However, he still thought about you. Always. Even when he was ensuring your safety like this. 

He glanced at the watch on his wrist, noting the time to add to the report he’s been working on to prove that he wasn’t just lazing around. In fact, he’s been trying to find some work to do whenever he could to ensure he kept a safe distance from you. Keep it professional despite growing closer. Besides that, he didn’t want you to feel awkward about the kiss you shared. 

Thankfully, you seemed to be doing just fine as far as he’s noticed. 

After taking one last look around the countryside, trying to spot anything suspicious, Ghost headed back inside. When he saw that you were absent from the couch, a brief moment of panic set in. It was the sight of the book you were reading, carefully closed and bookmarked on the coffee table, that allowed him to relax. You were probably taking a nap in your room, he figured. 

Taking advantage of the moment, he fixed himself a cup of tea in the kitchen. Once his brew was ready, he brought his cup over to the couch. He settled himself down and reached for the remote to watch some news. Life didn’t slow down just because he was out in the middle of nowhere. As soon as the television turned on though, he choked on his drink. 

Someone forgot to exit the channel before turning off the television. 

Ghost was suddenly met with thumbnails upon thumbnails of porn. Nothing telling of your tastes since it was just the trending page, yet it was still a shock to the eyes. He couldn’t help but laugh a little in his surprise. It didn’t take long for him to piece together that you probably weren’t in your room just taking a nap.

Before Ghost switched the channel, though, he looked through the options of explicit videos. He understood that you probably have never seen porn before, so this was another one of your “research” sessions. That’s not what started to bother him.

What started to bother him was the fact that you shouldn’t be getting your sex education from porn. If you wanted to know what it was really like, you could’ve just asked him. He may not have had many partners in his life, but he still knew the real experience. You deserved to know what real, healthy sex was like. Not filmed, directed sex. 

That, and a princess like you should set her standards high when it came to sex. Something Ghost was willing to set for you.

Even if this was wrong, he didn’t care. If the mission was going to end soon and he would have to say goodbye, he wanted to ensure that you would still accept nothing but the best in and outside the bedroom. He wanted you to ensure that you would end up with someone that would treat you right.

Someone like him. 

Turning off the television, Ghost abandoned his tea and headed toward your bedroom. He softly knocked on your door and waited, hoping that he didn’t catch you too off guard. 

As soon as you heard the knock, you jumped in fright, leaving you right on the edge of an orgasm that you finally managed to approach. Ghost was back early. You should’ve cared to listen closer to the sound of him coming back in the house. 

You fixed your clothes hastily, cheeks still flushed pink from your solo sexual adventure. Shyly, you opened the door to greet your patient bodyguard. Clearing your throat, you spoke in that usual, refined manner that you trained yourself to use to cover up evidence of inelegance. “Yes, Lieutenant?”

“We have something to talk about. May I come in, Princess?” Ghost treaded carefully, not wanting to startle you, but also not wanting to offer an opportunity of complete rejection just yet. You opened the door wider to let him in, your heart and mind racing on what Ghost could possibly need to talk about.

He sat on the edge of your bed and patted the spot next to him. Timidly, you took a seat beside him. The naturally sweet scent of yours almost made Ghost pull you into his lap. It was like he was obsessed with you. It almost unsettled how deeply he fell for you.

Once you seemed comfortable, he began without that careful language he had learned to speak when he was with you. It was better to be himself about this, especially if he wanted to get what he wanted. Straight-forward. “You forgot to reset the TV. I saw what you were looking at when I came back from my perimeter check.”

Your body suddenly heated up as if a wave of fire washed over you. Cheeks turned scarlet and you nearly couldn’t breath. The way he was speaking so bluntly with you caught you off guard as well. Words were trapped in your throat. What does someone say in this situation?!

That gaze of yours that Ghost wanted on him was averted in embarrassment. He couldn’t blame you, but he wasn’t going to let you escape either. He had a standard he had to set for you. 

He took your chin to guide your eyes back on him. By now it felt like your heart was going to give out with how hard it was beating. 

“You really wanna know what sex is like?”

You could have sworn his voice lowered to seduce you. It felt huskier as it echoed in your ears. It was working too. Your mind immediately screamed to say yes, to take what was being offered to you. Though, you stopped yourself from taking the opportunity. This didn’t even feel real. You swallowed down the lump in your throat before speaking. “Lieutenant G-”

“Simon Riley. It’s okay to call me by my real name, Princess. It’s also a simple yes or no. Do you want to know what it’s like? How you should be treated?”

Biting your lip, you thought deeply about this proposal. If you were to say yes, you and Ghost would be crossing so many boundaries that you might not recover from. The kiss was something the both of you were able to seemingly recover from. But that was small compared to sex. 

Especially since you were still a virgin. 

God, did you want him though. You really, really wanted him. You probably wanted him more than anything in your life.

Finally, you justified that you could keep a secret. Ghost certainly could too. You trusted him. Meekly, you gave him the answer he was hoping for. “Y-Yes. Please, be gentle. . .”

Within a blink of an eye, he pulled you into his lap and held you close. Removing the mask revealed a more clear, confident sea within his eyes. “Of course. I’ll teach you everything you want to know.”

His lips pressed firmly against yours, not being able to be apart from you a moment longer. Damn, he’s missed those soft lips of yours. He missed the heat of your body against his. It felt like it’s been ages since the last time you kissed. He felt determined to get his fill before it was too late. 

Your own senses were ignited like fireworks, tingles making its way down all the way to the tips of your fingers that held onto your bodyguard for dear life. Having been left on the edge of orgasm from before made you feel more sensitive than usual too. You felt every inch of his lips, every movement of his hands tracing your curves. It was difficult to suppress all the pleasurable shivers he gave you. 

When he slipped his tongue into your mouth, you moaned, a sharp pleasure traveling down your spine. That only encouraged Simon to take it a step further. Your shirt was raised slightly, giving him enough room to touch your bare skinned hips with his hands. Your skin was soft beyond belief that it drove him wild. 

By now you were struggling to catch your breath, his kisses becoming more intense as he was able to touch you without the barrier of your shirt. He kissed you with such need, passion, and desire that it made your head spin. He ate up every moan that escaped you like it would be the last time he would be able to.

You were gripping his shoulders so tight that your nails dug into his skin. But he wouldn’t have it any other way. It only made him want more. He broke the kiss and went straight to your ear, making sure that your breasts were tightly pressed against his chest. There was no escape for you as he teased your ears with sweet words in that deep baritone voice you grew to love. All while his hands worked to massage your bare waist. 

“You should be kissed passionately like you are the most beautiful woman on this planet. Your partner should take their time to find all your sweet spots too.” Simon advised, his lips grazing your ears as he spoke. 

Your breath got caught in your throat as he told you how much you should be treasured. How soft your skin was underneath his fingertips. How decadent your kisses tasted to the point that he needed more. How your future partner should treat you just like this. 

Finally, he could kiss that neck that he’s been dying to kiss every time you put your hair up. His lips landed on your neck, causing you to tremble as he licked, nipped, and suckled. It was heavenly. Underneath you, you could feel his growing erection pressing into you. Even underneath his jeans, you could tell that he was big. It filled you with a newfound sense of pride that you could arouse someone as serious as your bodyguard. He was attracted to you as much as you were attracted to him. 

Slowly, Simon began to tip you back within his lap, forcing you to hang on to him if you didn’t want to fall. He took advantage of the position, trailing his kisses down to your collarbone and nearing your breasts. His hand supported the curve of your back, gravity allowing him to really feel every shiver that passed through you. 

“They should make you tremble in pleasure just like this. They should want to press their lips against every inch of your skin. They should get excited by giving you pleasure first.” He continued to confess as he nipped at the tops of your breasts. He was driving you crazy with each touch, your cunt dripping wet like he’s been teasing you for hours. 

Suddenly, he swung you around and laid you down onto the bed. Simon hovered over you with a sexy smirk on his face. 

“If you want more, then strip for me, Princess.”

[queensunshinee]

Time Of Our Lives || Part 5

Patrick is not stupid. He knows what he feels for everyone in his life. For example, he kind of hates his parents. And he knows it’s privileged to hate your parents when you’re a rich, white man in your early twenties. But he hates the fact that there was never any laughter in his house. The meals were always quiet. The stories were always boring. The people who came to visit were always the same people. That's why he clung so much to summer vacations at Art’s place. In Art’s house, there was warmth that wasn’t in his own. In Art’s house, there was sophisticated humor and lightness that his parents couldn’t provide. In the moments he didn’t hate them, he thought they wanted to give him that too, they just didn’t know how.

Patrick also knows that every relationship in his life is temporary. Because Patrick can’t love anyone the way he loves Liana. It’s something he knows from the second his eyes met her green ones. It’s an integral part of his personality. There’s who he is in front of the whole world and there’s who he is in front of Liana. And he can’t explain it. Not really. Because if he tries to be objective, Patrick knows Liana isn’t the most beautiful girl he’s met. Tashi, his current girlfriend, is the most beautiful girl he’s met. Liana isn’t the most special girl, not the prettiest, not the most charismatic. Nothing about her is flashy or something that demands his love. But her silence grounds him. While he can break racket after racket on the court and fight with Tashi for hours about moves, argue with his parents about the direction his life is going, it takes one phone call to Liana and he remembers who he wants to be. He’s not there yet; he’s not who he wants to be. Not even close. But he’s trying to be on the right path. Anyway, Patrick knew his relationship with Tashi was temporary. It was situational at best. He didn’t deceive her, he told her from the beginning where it was going. He didn’t explain why, just said he was looking for something light. Tashi made it clear to him that she doesn’t do anything lightly. She made it clear to him again and again but Patrick chose not to listen. That’s how he found himself lying beneath her in her room, while she whispered dirty words in his ear and his hands held her ass. His eyes were closed. All he wanted was to relax and release some steam from the last few months. “I think Art and Liana are fucking,” she said suddenly, while her hand gently held his dick. She looked at him with scrutinizing eyes, seeing how his body tensed and his eyes opened. “Why do you say that?” he groaned as her hand moved faster. “I see them every day in the cafeteria. It’s cute, the way he touches her sometimes and thinks no one notices.” She continued, her lips kissing his neck with small kisses. “Where does he touch her?” Patrick found himself asking. He closed his eyes, imagining what would have happened if he had gone to Stanford too, if instead of Art, he was the one touching Liana. If Liana’s lips were the ones kissing him now. “They always sit next to each other and his hand is always on her thigh.” Tashi said, her lips merging with his, she knew he was close. His fingers automatically went to her thigh, nearing where she really wanted him. “I always think that if no one were there, Art would bend her over the table. To show her who she belongs to.” Tashi said and his fingers were already inside her, moving erratically. “Fuck, Liana.” Patrick said as the viscous fluid came out of him and Tashi quickly stood up, looking at him in disgust. “Tash…” he mumbled. Understanding what just happened now. “I should have chosen Art. But we both know who chose him instead.” She said, putting on a shirt and continuing to look at him with revulsion. “Tash, I’m sorry. You talked about her and-” “I don’t care, Patrick. You and Art need to sort your shit out and leave me alone.” She said and he nodded in response, quickly gathering his things and leaving her room.

“Okay, you look miserable. What happened with Tashi?” Art asked as they sat in the park drinking cheap beer. “Do you think I should have come to college with you guys?” Patrick responded with a question, not wanting to tell his best friend about the fiasco that happened just hours earlier in Tashi's room. “Honestly? No, Patrick. Of course not.” He chuckled and examined Patrick, who looked unsettled, a bit like a kicked dog. “It’s not that I’m stupid, I would’ve managed to finish a degree, Art,” Patrick felt the need to defend himself. His life choices so far didn't seem impressive. “I didn’t say you’re stupid, Patrick.” Art sighed, not wanting to burden his friend even more than he was burdening himself. “Honestly? It’s tough here. My schedule is crazy and now before exams, I really don’t understand why I did this to myself.” He shrugged. He wasn’t lying. This period was truly exhausting. “Your tennis has improved,” Patrick stated. He had watched part of Art’s practice earlier. Another thing that unsettled him, Art was playing much better than he did six months ago. He couldn’t help but wonder what would have happened if he had gone to Stanford too, instead of insisting on playing professionally too early. “The training here is insane, Patrick. Even Liana’s tennis would improve if they pushed her like this,” Art tried to lighten the mood. He started to worry. Patrick’s current mood didn’t characterize him at all. Patrick just sighed and leaned against the tree behind him. “You want to talk about it?” Art asked, running his hand nervously over his own neck. “Not really.” Patrick shrugged and closed his eyes for a second. “How is it? being here with Liana?” He dared to ask after a few seconds of silence. The two boys looked at each other. Neither of them knew how to approach the subject. It wasn’t like talking about Tashi. They talked about Tashi lightly. They both wanted her. They both were attracted to her. They both saw her as an unattainable woman. Someone who wasn’t in their league but for some reason looked their way. Threw them a bone, and they were hers. Talking about Liana was different. Neither of them wanted to talk about her with the other. “You know how it is. We’re closer than we were before. You saw yesterday, in her room.” Art said and swallowed, examining his best friend. Every movement in his expression. “Yeah, Tashi mentioned something like that…” Patrick tried to gather more details. “What did she say?” Art was curious. “Something about cafeteria meals.” Patrick’s smile wasn’t genuine; it was the kind that hides all his emotions. All the flame burning beneath the surface. “Oh, I always have extra credit in the cafeteria and Liana loves the pie they serve there.” Art smiled a similar smile. And he didn’t take his eyes off his best friend. Not fully understanding what was happening right now, but knowing that any game Patrick played, he could play too. It was a competition. It was another competition between them, only Art didn’t fully understand all its layers while Patrick knew since he was twelve. From the first time his eyes landed on Liana’s green eyes and Art stood between them. Patrick wasn’t the only one in love with Liana.

Patrick wandered around her room while Liana sat on the bed with her laptop on her lap, almost ignoring his presence but fully aware of him. He looked at the books she had on the shelves, at the gray synthetic carpet, the maroon curtains. Her room had character. “Leave my drawers alone, Pat,” she said without looking up from her computer. “Can you pay attention to me?” he asked, sitting on the chair and dragging it closer to her. “No. We had a deal. You’re supposed to be good and I’m supposed to study,” she said. In moments like these, he wondered if she knew how sexual she sounded. How dirty the things he wanted to do to her were. How many things he wanted to teach her. “I’m bored,” he found himself restraining from bluntly responding to what she said earlier about his behavior. About how bad he could really be. “Go to Tashi,” she sent him away, still not looking at him. He snatched her computer away. “Patrick.” She looked at him, furrowing her eyebrows. “Fifteen minutes of your time, Amanda. Fifteen minutes,” he smiled a smile he was pretty sure she couldn’t resist. “Fifteen minutes.” She surrendered and he moved from the chair to the bed. “Talk to me, what’s going on? Tell me about the university,” he requested, making circular motions on her arm while she let her head rest on his shoulder. “You know how it is, Patrick, I study all day. I don’t have much time for anything special.” She shrugged. “You sound worried,” he shifted a bit, making her lift her head so he could examine her closely. She looked even more exhausted than yesterday if that made sense. “Shit, Liana, you remember these exams are bullshit, right? You can’t kill yourself for a grade.” He stated. “Isn’t that exactly what you do for tennis?” she asked defensively. “It’s different.” He protested. “How is it different? You devote all of yourself to something important to you. Why can’t I do the same thing? Just because I don’t know how to hit a ball, my ambitions aren’t important?” her nerves were frayed. He didn’t understand how the conversation had heated up to the point where she raised her voice at him. “I didn’t say that,” he said quietly. “I’m supposed to choose my major. You don’t understand the level of the entrance exams for architecture. Sorry, Pat, I have to keep studying, I can’t babysit you. Go to Art if you fought with Tashi.” She took the computer and moved to the chair, ignoring his presence. “Liana, I didn’t mean…” he felt defeated, not understanding what he had done wrong. “You never mean it, Patrick. But just because I don’t play tennis doesn’t mean I’m not important.” She looked at him with those big eyes of hers. He knew her frustration wasn’t necessarily directed at him and bit his tongue. nodding in her direction. “I’m leaving tomorrow around 10 AM if you want to say goodbye…” he mumbled before leaving. Feeling a bit pathetic. But how was he supposed to explain to the girl in front of him that she and tennis weren’t even on the same level of importance in his life? How was he supposed to explain to her that she was the most important thing, when he still wasn’t the person she deserved him to be?

To all the Patrick fans of the story, how are we doing with this chapter? I really love hearing what you're thinking about this 'cause I'm obsessed with all of them. Tashi included, even if she doesn't have a big role in it. By the way- what are your thoughts about Liana in general? Art? Patrick? OK, I'm over doing it Again. Ask box is open as usual ❤️

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