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#I have been in a Fucking Mood. today
wizardnuke · 2 years
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sorry boss I can't come in for a few hours today because I've been inflicted w my monthly case of bitch disease and might start to cry if the store music is too loud or something
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unpretty · 5 months
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deathdaydreamm · 4 months
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man I have had a fucking crazy week
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buglaur · 2 years
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britechester’s newest cuties
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toobruhlforschool · 2 years
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Daniel Brühl as Laszlo Kreizler The Alienist | "Castle in the Sky" (2018)
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a-wondering-thought · 3 months
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Omfg im finally on the wifi
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motto-chanto-itte · 4 months
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something i like about the apothecary diaries is how information in this show is so inference-based because as someone who is Bad at inference it feels like a punch to the gut everytime they just drop a bombshell casually like they expected us to have pieced things together already
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minamotoz · 8 months
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mfw no funny gamer bf
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suffercerebral · 9 days
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me having gone to bed at 6 am every day for the past week and generally spiraling mentally while rotting in bed waking up this morning: a 4 mile hike in the heat is a really good idea right now, and while we're at it let's start like 3 art projects
#maybe my mom was onto something all these years telling me i'm bipolar#no i don't think i am but i do technically have a bpd diagnosis so like. mood swings up the fucking wazoo are not new#but i am not one to be like 'exercise will fix me'#i've also just come to terms recently with the fact that i didn't kill myself already so might as well start thinking of the long term#so not being in constant pain when im older is something im actually thinking of now#so like. gotta move more which i was doing during this semester! walking like 3 miles a day which didn't help brain but#it's gotta be good for you anyway even if i don't get the endorphins everyone says you get when working out#that's neverrrr been me bc also chronic illness w exercise intolerance#so it's like. wah i have a desire to move my body more and know it's beneficial#but chronic illness + mental illness + trying not to think about exercise in terms of weight loss bc i'm trying not to make that the goal#although certainly wouldn't be mad if that was the result but if i prioritize it over just overall health it's gonna make me obsessive#i'm saying a lot of words. i have no one to really talk to so i once again come to tumblr as a public diary#ANYWAY. trying to find balance with wanting to exercise for overall well-being but dealing with other factors like chronic illness#which has actually been under the most control it's been in years i barely even consider myself (physicslly) disabled these days#and also balancing the fact that while my disordered eating has never recovered and i still have extremely bad relationship with myself#im in a relatively better place with that. i'm not starving myself and im not going through binge/purge cycles#but my relationship with food and eating is still very much unhealthy#and i don't think that will ever really change bc it's so ingrained in the everything about me#i don't really know what i'm talking ahout anymore or what prompted this#i can't simply just say 'i'm gonna go for a hike today' and be normal about. always gotta psycho analyze myself#im in a very weird stage in my life where i feel like i have control over nothing and i barely even exist in my own body#im just like a cacophony of voices trapped inside a meat suit but im not in the drivers seat im stuffed in the trunk and tied up#and the guy driving is an old blind mind who should have lost his license his ass is NOT road safe!#so it's like i have all these ideas and desires and feelings and ahh!! but hey i'm locked up here let me out please#and also the state of the world. so bleak and hopeless and paralyzing that i've just kind of shut my feelings off so i'm rapidly switching#between numbness and overwhelming agony#what the fuck am i talking about
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fanfoolishness · 5 months
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When you wake up horny but your spouse has to go to work to launch a space rocket instead of the sexy sort, so you are le sad
Then you realize you’re just in a foul mood regardless and try to distract yourself with art
(Newsflash: it does not work and you hate everything, and sure now you have more prints but you hate all of them)
Then you think maybe you’ll distract yourself with things that need the internet, only to realize your WiFi is utterly completely dead and has been all day
So you try to reset what you think are the router(s)??? (Why does this always happen when husband, who does this stuff, is gone) Except now not only is your network not working but it is just Gone and no longer even discoverable by your devices (now you have a creeping sense of dread you have created much more work for husband)
Then you remember husband also has the home lights all set to work with WiFi
And it was a 14 hour rocket launch shift so now it’s your bedtime and he’s still not here, and you can’t turn off the lights with your phone like normal, but if you turn them off manually, he won’t be able to see anything when he comes home, so you are going to bed with half the lights on so he won’t trip and die when he gets home at 2 in the morning
And you usually fall asleep to streaming reruns, but remember: no internet, so it’s just silence and you aren’t sleepy at all even though you have to be up in the morning
And basically everything is very stupid and you hate everything and everything is the worst.
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dyeinggoosenoises · 1 month
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dude having a uterus fucking sucks
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destinyandcoins · 6 months
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ragingtwilight · 10 months
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WHY AM I SO EEPY!!!!! WHY NOW!!! I HAVE ATTACKS TO MAKE!!!! REVENGES NEED TO BE DONE!!!! THIS IS CATASTROPHIC!!!!!!!
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buglaur · 1 year
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legacy outtakes
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humanmorph · 5 months
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i took the we in "before we come undone" as gur + figure at first and their bond (always at peril not only by whatever gur is talking about here, but also figures number of the beast thing.) but other possibilities: collective we (as in, everything and everyone. idk. just seems bad out there. whatever's happening.) or just gur (multiple of them) . He's losing grip & can feel it
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myriadsystem · 1 month
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#personal#i have doctors appt today with a new doctor its literally not even a real appointment i just need some stupid forms signed#but guys im so stressed im so scared ive already cried once about it today i just. i fucking hate doctors so so much#theyre all so bad. im not in the mood to be dismissed again today and its 15 goddamn degrees so everything feels bigger and worse than it is#if they dont sign the form i dont get paid any more and if i dont get paid i cant continue to try and sort out my medical#which means i continue to not get paid and im just. so scared. so so fucking scared i dont even care if we find the start if the path#to vetter my health i dont care about gettinf better right now i just need this fucking form signed but#ive already been dismissised for it once and i have new doctor jitters. what do you mean i have to tell someone new that#i have ptsd and anxiety and depression and fibro and alleged bpd but its probably autism actually and hope#hope and prey they losten to me because its other doctors that have told me this and im definitely computer illiterate i couldntve come up#with all this on my own i promise ive done zero research into my own symptoms i live with every day im a simpleton im an idiot#please believe me dr refer me to ypur colleagues for further testing but in the mwan time sign the one form i need please#im so scared. i dont know what to do. my tarot says to tryst myself and find my own authority about the situation#but like literally legally i cant i have to rely on the hope this new doctor gives her signature or i dont get fucking paid as stated#i hate this i feel so shaky and nervous and nauseous and awful 😮‍💨#and im supposed to do groceries today. im at the very end of my shopping like if i dont go get food today#then i dont eat tonight but its cold and rainy and im super stressed abt the appointment so idk if ill be able to go shopping after#i dont wanna die anymore but like rn i kinda do this is too much today feels like too much#help me im drowning
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