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#I have to be the lamest 21 year old ever

stealingyourbones · 2 years

Note

*puts 'What's New Pussycat' 21 times in your Diner Jukebox and 'It's Not Unusual' somewhere random in between*

*sits at a random table waiting for Celia, who definitely knows what I've done*

Don't look at me like that, there's a reason why I'm doing this.

Okay, I don't really have a real reason. I just thought it would be funny after everything going on in the Ghost Zone.

You know that old fairy tale? Of the Princess Who Doesn't Laugh?

No?

Well, it isn't as well-known. The version I know if is of this princess who hasn't been able to laugh since her mother died, and the person who manages to make her laugh will be her spouse and new King of the Kingdom.

The Ghost King's sibling, Princess Jasmine, had been apathetic lately. Us ghosts think it's the immortality being liminal gave her. Immortals gets bored after the first few hundred years, y'know?

But... His Highness believes that she's... well... heartsick? Which is stupid, because I've never been much for romance myself. But, I guess when you've got most of your life together, you do get ready to take the next step, amiright? Marriage. Family. All that romantic shit.

*receives burger* Thanks.

Most of us ghosts has now tried to woo her, but His Highness put a stop to the wooing. Instead, he put out this... contest. Whoever manages to make Princess Jasmine smile will be a 'candidate'. Not a guarantee, but a 'candidate'. Which means that even when you've managed to make her smile or laugh, she still has the means to turn you away.

I love His Highness for doin' that.

There's this little problem, though. The contest isn't limited to ghosts. Anyone from the living could also participate, and once they win the heart of Princess Jasmine and marry her, they'll receive the same liminality she got.

So, everyone's super surprised when this... this... kid from years ago with your Gotham Robin colors dropped into the courtroom and managed to make her smile! And Laugh! Princess Jasmine didn't let him be part of the contest because he's, well, a kid. Kudos to her. The contest was paused after that, because her motherly and sisterly instincts activated just by being with the kid. And, when you're a ghost kid, you don't actually grow. You learn more, yeah. But your childish tendencies don't really mature.

Anyways. He made her happy, so us ghosts just left it alone. Maybe her obsession was caregiving or some shit, so when His Highness became independent and really didn't need his sister anymore, she had nothing to do.

Then, the kid disappeared. And Princess Jasmine was back to being sad.

But here's the thing, the Kid is back. Just last week. He's alive, he's taller (not as tall as our Princess, though!), he's rougher, and he's... he's... *holds face in hands* HE'S HOT. HE'S NO LONGER THE CUTE SUNSHINE BOY THAT FELL INTO THE THRONE ROOM.

I thought the Princess Jasmine was going to turn him away, because he doesn't seem like the type to activate motherly instincts anymore (maybe just mommy instincts-- *is bonked* OW! Yeah, I probably deserved that)

But no, the... the man (Oh Ancients, he's a MAN), the first thing he does is drop his bad boy persona and turn back to the cute boy that fell into the throne room, AND CRACK THE LAMEST JOKE I'VE EVER HEARD.

It was so quiet, I was feeling secondhand embarrassment for him.

BUT THEN.

PRINCESS JASMINE.

LAUGHED.

SHE LAUGHED WITH TEARS.

It was the most beautiful sound in the Ghost Zone that got even His Highness crying with happiness.

*wipes eyes*

After that, the two decided to reconnect. King Danny even removed the bad ectoplasm in his system. And...

Well..

For the past week...

*smiles*

*gestures to a table near the window, which had Jasmine laughing at Jason seething with frustration over the music. Jasmine then says something, which calms Jason down, and they begin talking about cutesy couple-y stuff.*

Yeah...

*It's Not Unusual starts playing*

*everyone sighs with relief*

Anyways, *hands you some sharpened shoulder blades of Mammoths* Thanks for listening to me. Have a good one, Celia! The Burgers are delicious!

*After heading out, a few minutes later, one Batman cries loudly in frustration when What's New Pussycat plays in the Jukebox, causing Jasmine and Jason to find out that they're being stalked by the Batfam*

first of all anon, thank you for being the person who started the entire celia bones thing because holy shit it's been so fun watching people make lore and create concepts of the diner. (at least I'm 99% sure its you cause its the same writing style.)

In thanks, I did a very speedy lil doodle for ya <3

and now, on to answering this prompt. The story of the Princess Who Doesn't Laugh is quite a wonderous tale. I appreciate your gracious tip and story. Come back again!

From what I hear, The ghost child was there for many years but the day he vanished, oh that day is known around the entire Ghost Zone. Ghosts claim that they could hear the Princess's wails of sorrow throughout the entire Zone.

Hearing that he's back is quite a surprise. I can agree that the Princess has a type and I admire it Heavily. The man grew up a lot. More so than a person should in those years of being back in the living realm.

It's interesting. The Princess hasn't laughed in so long. Some even rumored that her laughter was a form of blessing. to be bestowed the honor of letting the princess experience joy was incredible in and of itself. The possible magical wards and protections said to be given to the jokester have been claimed to be simple spells to some of the most complex magical enchantments that the Ghost Zone has ever seen.

#danny phantom #dp x dc #dc comics #writing prompts #dp x dc prompt #dpxdc #bones replies #celia bones #anon

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womanofwords · 2 years

Text

Masterlist

OC dossier

Tobey’s Community Service (COMPLETE)

Synopsis: as penance for the many times his robots have destroyed the city, Tobey’s community service is to teach the basics of robotics to children. (This is a WordGirl fanfic.)

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

Part 5

Part 6

Ghost Hunters Series (COMPLETE*)

Synopsis: two boys go ghost-hunting in an abandoned, dilapidated mansion and stumble across something amazing that changes their lives. (Based on a series of artworks by @shyticklemonster and listed in reading order.)

Ghost Hunting

Ghostly Vengeance

Ghost Tricks

A Taste Of Halloween Candy

*I will add to this series if @shyticklemonster makes more artworks for me to base my writing on.

The Offer of a Lifetime (COMPLETE)

Synopsis: Hero and Sidekick stumble across a superpowered civilian and recruit them into the team. There’s just one problem: they don’t want to.

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

Part 5

Part 6

High School (COMPLETE)

Synopsis: Frustrated by their behaviour, Superhero turns Hero and Villain into teenagers and sends them to high school to learn some important life skills.

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

Part 5

Part 6

Glitter (COMPLETE)

Synopsis: Hero has always been a guy’s guy. That is, until he gets assigned the girliest female sidekick to ever live. The worst part is, it’s beginning to rub off on him, and that could spell disaster for his image! What’s a guy to do?

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

Part 5

Part 6

Part 7

Part 8

Part 9

STEM Kids Shenanigans (COMPLETE)

Synopsis: When the principal of Marbleton Secondary School created a STEM club for the best and the brightest, she expected prestige and respectability to come to the school. When the students heard about it, they expected it to be filled with nerds.

But the four members of the club find themselves making tight friendships and awesome inventions. They also find themselves in a war with the most relentless prefect to ever be a prefect.

Chapter 1: Making STEM Club

Chapter 2: Introductions

Chapter 3: Change

Chapter 4: Spice

Chapter 5: Trinkets

Chapter 6: Parent Observation Day

Chapter 7: Study Group

Chapter 8: Subtle Messages

Chapter 9: The Unseen

Chapter 10: Day Of The Pink

Chapter 11: Connections

Chapter 12: Slime

Chapter 13: Surveillance

Chapter 14: Public Opinion

Chapter 15: Flight

Chapter 16: Front Page Fallout

Chapter 17: Paint

Chapter 18: Melanie’s Cousin

Chapter 19: Bird’s Nest

Chapter 20: A Very Grounded Young Man

Chapter 21: Adult Supervision

Chapter 22: Matching Patches

Chapter 23: Gloves

Chapter 24: Layla’s Plants

Chapter 25: The Other Secondary School

Chapter 26: The Hated One

Chapter 27: Monitoring Melanie

Chapter 28: Feral Newspaper Hound

Chapter 29: Acting Out

Chapter 30: Bugged

Chapter 31: Checking In

Chapter 32: Stephan’s Black Book

Chapter 33: Engineered Dramatics

Chapter 34: Talking To The Sainsbury Girls

Chapter 35: Stashed Secrets Spilled

Chapter 36: Principal’s Office

Chapter 37: Celebrity and Confessions

Chapter 38: Apologies

Chapter 39: Unwanted Appearances

Chapter 40: A Proper Conclusion

The Poisoned Prodigy (COMPLETE)

Synopsis: When normal Vincent Song is invited to his best friend’s school’s end-of-year awards ceremony, his only real worry is whether or not his brother’s old tux will fit him. But when said best friend, Renaissance boy Patton Reynolds, collapses at the podium after drinking some tainted water, it’s obvious that he was poisoned.

Patton names someone just before he passes out and at first, it seems like the genius solved his own murder attempt. But something’s not right. It’s up to Vincent, described by his own brother as ‘the lamest teenage boy in the world’ to navigate a world of geniuses to find the true culprit and get true justice for his best friend.

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

Chapter 10

Chapter 11

Nerd Juvie (IN PROGRESS)

Synopsis: Marco, a troubled yet gifted young man, gets sent to the Lazarus Institute after getting caught drag racing on a bike that he made himself. The Lazarus Institute is a rehabilitation centre run by Dr Bertram Lazarus especially for gifted teenagers on the wrong side of the law, and for a while, it seems like everything is looking up. But when Marco stumbles across sinister plans for the residents, he is forced to question everything. Is Dr Lazarus the benevolent man everybody believed him to be?

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

#masterlist #writing #my writing

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fckeverything-v · 5 years

Text

1. Do you bite or lick ice cream? Lick

2. What is home to you? Alabama:/

3. What was the last lie you told? I couldnt tell you

4. Does everyone deserve the truth? Maybe not?

6. Describe a moment in which you did something unacceptable in a bad situation. Walk away, move states..

7. List two things that are more easily done than said. (No, I didn't mix them up.) Being alone & fuck irdk

8. When was the last time you worked really hard to achieve something? Mhm 4 years ago.

9. How many all nighters have you pulled? A lotttt haha

10. If humans didn't evolve to laugh or smile, how would we express our happiness instead? Woah people express that? no but humans would probably bone all the time.

11. How many romantic "things" or "flings" have you had? Only 2 (technically 3) serious relationships. Many flings.

12. What is your paradise? I dont have one :(

13. What is your favorite background noise? (Ex. Water dripping, people talking.) Music

14. How many hearts do you think you have broken? Only 1... maybe 2 soon. (not you hehe.)

15. What is the most important thing about electronics? What does this say about you? Finding friendships through social media or other platforms. And mhm probably that im a lonely pos

16. Why do people care about celebrities? Do you care about celebrities? Because they're pretty. Not really.

17. What is the most annoying thing someone can do to you? Chew loud.

18. Do you overexaggerate? What are the pros and cons of this? Eh, yeah. And I cant think of any pros.

19. Have you played any instruments before? Which instruments? Piano, saxophone

20. Do you like taking selfies? Why or why not? No. I stare at it until i hate it.

21. List 3 things you like about yourself?

22. What is the best advice someone has ever given you? To not give up. As simple as that sounds.

23. Do you have what it takes to raise a child? Why or why not? No. Dont you need to be mentally stable- i would hope so..

24. How do you cheer yourself up after a bad day? Play games for hours.

25. When was the last time you felt awkward? Ha. Literally 5 minutes ago.

26. Are you introverted or extroverted? Or a mixture of both? Introverted x100000

27. What constitutes a good friend? Someone who doesnt give up on you amd atleast tries to understand.

28. Would you rather have a lot of friends to hang out with or just one best friend? One best friend.

29. In a regular day, what do you not want to hear? 'Hey hows your day going'

30. What is your dream job? Fuck, is this still a question.. to be a homicide detective in the biggest city i can think of.

31. Is it better to be lazy but smart or hardworking but unintelligent? Lazy and smart DUH

32. What is a truth about yourself that others find hard to believe?

33. What have you always wondered about the other gender? What it feels like to GET OFF. DUH.

34. Which fantasy world would you like to visit the most? Um my own dreams i guess.

35. Describe the worst friend you have ever befriended. Im not wasting my time describing that.

36. Imagine that you have switched bodies with someone you don't know. You can't switch back. What do you do? Live it up. I think id feel happy honestly.

37. If you found the recipe for immortality, would you sell it or would you burn it? Mh. Sell it, their problem now and im rich.

38. What is the most important, applicable class you have ever taken? Current events.

39. Name the last book you read. Dammed- chuck palahniuk

40. Imagine that you are unable to express emotion. How would this affect your world? No change

41. When was the last time you made the first move? Um never..

42. What is your opinion on electronic music such as dubstep or trap? Trash

43. What was the last tv show youve watched? Rick and Morty.

44. Do you like and appreciate your life? I appreciate what i am trying to do.

45. Do you like and appreciate yourself?

46. When was the last time you cried? Yesterday

47. What are you scared of? Heights.

48. What is the most embarrassing, cringe-worthy thing you have ever done? Um live my life everyday probably.

49. What are some of your hobbies? .... literally WORSE question. I smoke cigs. Is that a hobby?

50. What is a superficial yet annoying mistake you constantly make?

51. Are you a good friend? What makes you a good friend? If not, what makes you a bad friend? I feel like i am both. I try to be there for them. But also, im so hard to get so i feel like i might come off the wrong way a lot.

52. Do you honestly learn from your mistakes? Honestly; nope.

53. What have you learned the hard way? Not to care what people think. After wasting my whole life. Im starting to realize it doesnt matter.

54. What is the most important thing to have in order to attain happiness? Follow your heart

56. Are you a creative or a logical thinker? Both but probably logical.

57. What is the smartest thing you have ever done?

58. What is your ideal meal? Fuckk probably so good ass chicken with some gooooood asssssss mac and cheese. As lame as that sounds hahaha.

59. What is the worst thing someone could do on a date? 1. Go on date with me

60. Do you like animals? Which kind is your favorite? Yeah and dogs are cute but i love elephants.

61. If you could turn one legal thing illegal, what would it be? Christmas.

62. Do you have any guilty pleasures? Of courseeeee (;

63. What is the best thing that the internet has ever created? Video games.

64. Do you like playing video games? Which video games? Woah you read my mind of sum? Shooter games.

65. What is your opinion on beauty in today's society? Bullshit

66. Are you a morning person? When do you usually wake up? No not really and like 5pm nowadays.

67. Do you have a favorite Disney movie? Character? No

68. Would you rather live in the city or in the countryside? City but i love the countryside

69. Would you rather live near the ocean or in the mountains? Mountains

70. What are the best things about winter? Cold. Even though i hate it. Snow. Even if i dont see it. Trees dying.

71. What scares you most about the future? Literally everything.

72. What makes you feel old? Doing nothing.

73. How many hours do you spend on the computer or phone on average? Idk like 5.

74. What are some of your New Year's resolutions? Be a better me.

75. What is your life story in 6 words?

76. Describe yourself in one word. Awkward.

77. What bad habits do you do? Smoking

78. What genre of music do you listen to? everything

79. Most prominent childhood memory? I would say, but its embarrassing that that's the memory.

80. Imagine if you had an older brother. If you already have one, what is it like? If you don't, how would this change your life? My life would be so different. Maybe i would have someone to talk to.

81. Spirit animal?

82. Do you believe in horoscopes? Yes

83. What is the worst advice you've ever been given?

84. List the 3 most important people in your life right now. 1. Fox 2. Fox 3. Fox

85. Favorite memory of your family. :/

86. What do you look for in a relationship? Happiness

87. Do you have a role model? Why or why not? No. I dont need it. But now that i think about it i have one role model.

88. What is your opinion on social media? Dumb

89. Are you a pessimist or an optimist? Pessimest

90. List some things that you think are overpriced? Food

91. What is your worst memory or creepiest experience? ..

92. What superpower would ruin the world? Any of them

93. What is something you swore you would never do when you grew up, but you did anyway? Exactly what im doing now. Nothing. Giving up. Dropping out

94. What lessons have you learned from movies and which movies were they? Dont trust yourself when you know you arent okay. Fight club

95. If you could travel anywhere, where would you go? Europe

96. How do you approach people? I dont but i guess a smile.

97. What is your opinion on first impressions? I think theyre okay. Only if you dont judge.

98. What are some things you did as a child that you no longer do? Lol play with imaginary friends

99. What languages can you speak? English

100. What do you think society will be like in 30 years? Lol hopefully ill be dead bc that shit sounds terrible

101. What do you do on your lazy days? Play games.

102. What ended your last relationship? I had enough.

103. Favorite food? Soul food

104. What is the most terrifying dream you've ever had? Fuck im not saying.

105. When was the last time you got seriously angry? Last night

106. What was the last friendship you broke? My friend Ashley:(

107. Do you have any pet peeves? Close minded people

108. Who was the last person you gave a hug to? Zack

109. When was the last time you got seriously stressed? Last night

110. What part of your personality do you want to change? I dont have one.

111. Who is the most positively influential person in your life right now? My sister Grace.

112. What is your biggest motivation? My siblings. Faith & Grace.

113. What did you want to be when you were little? Honestly i never knew.

114. What are some things that you are good at? Smokin weed

115. What is one thing you want to be good at? Social skills

116. What distracts you the most, especially when you're trying to work? My mind

117. How important is privacy to you? Eh pretty significant i guess.

118. If you could create one social norm, what would it be? Be friends with everybody.

119. What's the craziest lie you've ever told? Um.. i told my 2nd grade teacher my family died in a car crash.

120. What story do you like to tell about yourself at parties? I dont go to parties haaha

121. What is the lamest thing that you have seen someone do? have friends and socialize too much like woah calm down you know youre still alone.. right. Like its only you. Hahah jk. But irdk.

122. What is the stupidest thing you've done to impress someone? a guy invited me over and ive never done anything sexual before so i pretended like i knew and i hurt his dick like bad. (We didnt have sex)

123. What is your morning routine? Wake up, wash face, brush teeth, get dressed, and then boom feel sad

124. What's the last thing you did that is worth remembering?

125. If karma was coming back to you, would it help or hurt you? Help

126. What is your opinion on playing "hard to get?" Being sort of isolated like not opening up. Which is okay bc if they want you they'll wait.

127. What are the pros and cons of straightforward? Cons, you may hurt feelings. Pro, you know yourself and what you want to say congratulations

128. What do you consider "leading" someone on? Being fake happy.

129. Are you the friendzoner or the friendzoned? Friendzoner

130. What do you admire most about your friends? How beautiful he is. Inside & out.

131. What do you admire most about your family? They're still here.

132. What is your opinion on "going with the flow?" You may forget where you are trying to go. Or who you are.

133. Do you enjoy talking or listening? Listening.

134. When is it time to end a friendship? Idk

135. What is the worst excuse you've ever come up with? Lol too many.

136. If GPA didn't matter, what courses would you have taken? Doesnt matter.

137. What are your favorite baby names? Ive always liked Riley for a girl name and idk havent thought Bout a boys name.

138. When was the last time you had a deep conversation with someone? Maybe a week or so ago. Or a few days ago.

139. What instantly ruins a conversation? Lack of excitement

140. Biggest turn ons and turn on offs. Affection. And idk

143. When did you last do something outside of your comfort zone? God every day.

147. What do you like about the 21st century? ???

141. Biggest disappointment. Myself

142. Do you have any self-restraint? A little.

144. Prized possession(s)? little things

145. What is your opinion on second chances? They might seem okay but idk.... depends i guess

146. Text or call? Both, depends on whom im texting or callin

148. What advice would you give to yourself 5 years ago? Life is hard and stupid but choices you make will stay with you forever so what are you gonna do, follow your heart or head? (head is better hope)

149. How organized are you? Eh not really anymore.

150. Favorite mode of transportation. My car

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sunnydaleherald · 5 years

Text

The Sunnydale Herald Newsletter, September 7-8

Buffy: (chuckles) This has gotta be the *lamest* trick (lowers her stake) you guys have ever thought up. Spike: He's got your Watcher. Right now, he's probably torturing him. Buffy: What do you want? Spike: I told you. I want to stop Angel. (snickers) I want to save the world.

~~Becoming~~

[Drabbles & Short Fiction]

Burnt Cereal (Dawn, Spike, Buffy, G) by OkamiShadou98

The Other Way (Buffy/Dawn, E) by Ratirez

Library Of Love (Giles/Reader, G) by thegreatficmaster

Special (Buffy, Doyle, G) by ProtoNeoRomantic

She (Dawn, not rated) by Foxycasbones

a thousand different ways we fell apart (Jenny/Giles, T) by The_Eclectic_Bookworm

Slayer Sex Ed. (Buffy/Spike, T) by EllieRose101

Nightmares are the greatest ghost (Andrew, T) by MorganBaggins

Big Bad Wolf (Oz/Reader, not rated) by united-fandoms-in-one-home

Episode 89 – Triangle by buffypoetry

[Chaptered Fiction]

The Devil, You Know, Chapter 7 (crossover with Dexter, T) by frogfarm

Monster, How Should I Feel? Chapter 1-2 (Buffy/Spike, T) by OkamiShadou98

This Year's Boy, Chapter 1 (Xander, Faith, M) by Kylia

her father's daughter, Chapter 1 (Jenny, G) by The_Eclectic_Bookworm

The House of Heroes, Chapters 1-2 (Buffy, multiple crossovers, M) by renelf

Honeysuckle, Chapters 1-2 (Spike/OC, T, COMPLETE) by Mushroom_99

take my hand (we'll make it I swear), Chapter 1 (crossover with Miraculous Ladybug) by SailorChibi

Skipping the Stone, Chapter 40 (Buffy/Spike, R) by sandy_s, Badwolfjedi

Snowed In, Chapter 5-7 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by Dorians Kitten

Best Wishes, Chapter 13 (Buffy/Spike, PG-13) by Kanita

Kindred, Chapter 12 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by sweetprincipale

Breaking the Habit, Chapter 21 (Buffy/Spike, R) by all_choseny, Red_dragon

Let it burn!, Chapter 11 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by Axell

(Never) Let Me Go, Chapter 1 (Buffy/Spike, G) by talesofstories

[Images, Audio & Video]

Artwork: Lost Souls series for Angel’s 20th anniversary (AtS ensemble) by ofstormsandwolvesart

Gif Headers: Tara/Willow by wesleywyndcm

Icons: Tara Maclay by wesleywyndcm

Artwork: The city of Angels (Angel) by iseetheyelloweyed

Artwork: Vampire Xander by joliemariella

Video: BTVS - Spike - Glitter and Gold by kyrumption

[Reviews & Recaps]

Boom!Angel reviewed: S1, Issue 4 by harsens-rob

Buffy the Vampire Slayer #8 by buffylikescoke

PODCAST: Angel Special! First half of season one! by Buffy Virgin

[Community Announcements]

Twisting the Hellmouth Short Fic Challenges: Awards! by twistedshorts

Interest in Buffy holiday gift exchange? by secretslayer

IWRY Writer Spotlight: WillowFromBuffy by iwillrememberyoumarathon

[Fandom Discussions]

Something I Did Not Know by itsnotmymind

James Marsters HorrorHound Weekend 2019 Reports, Pics & Videos by dontkillspike

More Links Than A Bag Of Sausages by petzipellepingo

Boom! Verse confusion about Buffy's eye color by ifeveristoday

Men who use Buffy as a prop to argue that back in the good old days, female characters like Buffy weren’t Mary Sues... by mybitca

Anya deserved so much more by covert611

The Buffy/Angel dynamic as it is in the Boom! verse by ifeveristoday

Joss always planned to kill Spike at the end of S7 and bring him back somehow by rahirah

In defense of Beer Bad by isagrimorie

Angel Rewatch: 1.18 Five by Five hosted by nightshade

Willow's career? hosted by nightshade

Rank The Angel Seasons hosted by nightshade

Connor: A failure of the actor or the writing? hosted by Btvs fan

What if a slayer refuses to be a slayer or the parents refuse? by omgtehvampire

Doing a second watch of the OA and found mr trick in first episode! by kittyflaps

I hate Angel. Thoughts? by alpine5882

Religious symbols and vampires by CalendarGuy

Just got to “Passions”, Season 2, Episode 17, on my annual rewatch by YellowUnderbelly

Tabula rasa makes me laugh so much by Majora2305

First run through s6 was rough but it wasn't as rough as i saw other people saying by Majora2305

This moment brings me so much joy. by wonderfulwizardofaus

Who do you ship, Buffy and Angel, Buffy and Spike or Buffy and someone else? by BeccaBryce

Helpless season 3, episode 4. All of Buffy's clothes are ill fitting, baggy by missladybugs

This is a moment that makes my entire body clench up like a clam it hurts by Majora2305

Question about Kennedy! by His-Majesty

Ranking the seasons? by thatpaulieguy89

Broody Angel is such a bore... by shelbss72

Remember when Xander attempted murder? by FlickeringSkeleton

I am 41 and rewatching my Buffy DVD's for the first time in like close to 20 years... by jackiec2468

If Spike had gotten the spin-off instead of Angel, what type of show would it have been? by whedonversegeek

One of my favorite comedic moments from one of my favorite episodes by nateguerra

Buffy was one of my idols growing up by Batfan96

Buffy Crawling Out Of The Grave At The Start and End of S6 Was Brilliant by surferwannabe

Why the bathroom scene isn't rape. by Majora2305

Season 6 is the best season. Here’s why by ljcole90

Buffy's face when she's not in the mood for long fights by Fire-Bad-Tree-Pretty

season 4 thoughts!! by jigoflife

Faith's origin and Buffy's second death slayer by menwithven16

What kind of jacket is willow wearing here? by Majora2305

Who else got super pissed at the way buffy was repeatedly treated by the people claiming to love her? by AbsolvedMadman

Thrift shop find. Who knew there was an Angel Magazine?! by letterstosnapdragon

Fic search: Buffy and Spike meet Satan's daughter? by little__turtle

News: September 8, 2019 by myrabethfanfic

#btvs #ats #buffy the vampire slayer #angel the series

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1079mixfm · 5 years

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New Post has been published on https://mix1079.net/22-corporate-april-fools-day-pranks-ranked-from-best-to-lamest/?utm_source=TR&utm_medium=1079mixfm+on+Tumblr&utm_campaign=SNAP

22 Corporate April Fools' Day Pranks, Ranked from Best to Lamest

Well, we survived another April Fools’ Day. And, as it always goes, most brands unveiled some kind of mild, inoffensive prank for the holiday.

Here are 23 of the more notable April Fools’ Day pranks from yesterday, which we’ve subjectively ranked from best to lamest.

1. Jagermeister went edgy with the “Jagerbong” . . . a gift box that helps you turn an old Jagermeister bottle into a bong. It includes a pipe, a lighter, eye drops, and a hackey sack.

German engineering reaches a new high… pic.twitter.com/Az0Bf6dcQu

— Jägermeister USA (@JagermeisterUSA) March 29, 2019

2. The “L.A. Times”parodied the “New York Times” rep for writing about the rest of the U.S. like it’s a mysterious, cultural wasteland, quote, “No one associates New York, a city in the eastern United States, with good restaurants. That’s beginning to change.”

No one associates New York, a city in the eastern United States, with good restaurants. That's beginning to change. https://t.co/WpPyyvqKHU

— L.A. Times Food (@latimesfood) April 1, 2019

3. This got a lot of press coverage leading up to April Fools’ Day . . . but yes, Tinder’s new “height verification” feature is fake.

4. Honda Canada announced a new “polite horn,” where instead of honking, your horn makes a passive aggressive coughing sound.

youtube

5. McDonald’s Australia posted a picture of the McPickle . . . which is basically a Big Mac with a bunch of pickles replacing the meat. But it may backfire . . . because someone tweeted instructions on how to actually order it.

View this post on Instagram

Pickle lovers, it’s the news you’ve all been waiting for. We’re super stoked to announce the launch of our brand new McPickle Burger. It’s time to tuck into juicy, flavoursome pickles layered between melted cheese, ketchup sauce and toasted sesame seed buns. It’s sure to be a treat for all your senses. #dailynuggets #mcpickle #pickleoverload #maccas #imlovinit

A post shared by McDonald's Australia (@mcdonaldsau) on Mar 31, 2019 at 1:03pm PDT

6. Popchips went edgier than expected and announced individually-wrapped chips that are, quote, “ridged for your pleasure.”

View this post on Instagram

introducing our new single serve pack – Just the Chip! now you can practice safe snacking on-the-go, anywhere, anyplace, anytime, any position. #justthechip learn more via the link in our bio!

A post shared by popchips (@popchips) on Apr 1, 2019 at 6:00am PDT

7. The U.S. Open tweeted a Photoshopped picture of a cute dog serving as a tennis ball retriever for the next tournament.

BREAKING: The US Open to add puppies to the ballperson team at the 2019 tournament for the first time. All breeds welcome. pic.twitter.com/Yu5ySEhriF

— US Open Tennis (@usopen) April 1, 2019

8. Mova Globes announced a new flat globe for flat earthers.

You asked. We answered. The #FlatEarth MOVA Globe is available now on https://t.co/4HtFIUr2qg. pic.twitter.com/MFrphk9UGA

— MOVA Globes (@movaglobes) April 1, 2019

9. T-Mobile went for irony, and announced a new line of phone booths, to let you talk in privacy even on busy streets.

View this post on Instagram

Portable Public Privacy at its finest – go anywhere with our Phone BoothE Mobile EditionE.

A post shared by T-Mobile (@tmobile) on Mar 31, 2019 at 9:16pm PDT

10. McDonald’s announced “Shake Sauce” . . . little packets of shakes to dip your fries in. The comments are all people wishing it were real . . . it’s never good when people like your fake products more than your real ones.

View this post on Instagram

Meet #ShakeSauce — a sweet new way to dip.

A post shared by McDonald's (@mcdonalds) on Apr 1, 2019 at 5:01am PDT

11. SodaStream announced a new plan where you can add bubbles to your soda using your own bodily functions.

Houston we solved the problem! Burping in space is a thing of the past. Introducing our new collaboration with @StationCDRKelly, SodastreamME! Tag a friend you KNOW needs this :) pic.twitter.com/Cx3BIaickU

— SodaStream USA (@SodaStreamUSA) April 1, 2019

12. KFC announced chicken-flavored ice cream, infused with bits of candied chicken skin in a cornbread cone.

13. Lego announced a new “Find My Brick” app that scans a pile of Legos for the one you want. I know brands don’t want to be TOO edgy, but this is just TOO un-edgy.

The long search is finally over… 📱 #FindMyBrick pic.twitter.com/3yBIPJ2OPk

— LEGO (@LEGO_Group) April 1, 2019

14. Durex announced new fish skin condoms with a Mala hot pot flavor. Never mind, you CAN take a joke too far.

Spice things up & experience the taste of the NEW Fish Skin Condom with Mala Hot Pot flavour. Packed with handpicked…

Posted by Durex on Sunday, March 31, 2019

15. Google let you play the old school video game “Snake” on top of Google Maps. That’s not exactly a prank, it’s more of an Easter egg they’d roll out any other day of the year.

16. Hasbro played on the “millennials kill everything” cliché by announcing Mr. Potato Head has been replaced with Mr. Avocado Head. But it’s not landing great, probably because millennial-avocado jokes are just so played out.

Holy guacamole! We’ve given Mr. Potato Head the sack and we're introducing his new hipster companion, Mr Avo Head! pic.twitter.com/Y9aRITCTd7

— Hasbro (@Hasbro) April 1, 2019

17. Michelob Ultra started an online petition to create the first-ever cat park. Not sure what that has to do with super light beer, but there you go.

Dogs have dedicated parks everywhere. Cats have 0. Let’s change that. We’re petitioning on @Change to give cats & their owners the space they deserve to exercise together—the first-ever cat park! Show support by RTing and signing the petition in our bio! #ULTRACatPark. 🐈 pic.twitter.com/A0t8jl3Bgx

— Michelob ULTRA (@MichelobULTRA) March 30, 2019

18. Lockheed Martin announced a new fragrance called Vector, which smells like space.

19. Dunkin’ Donuts created a “super dough holder” . . . which is just two giant donuts around a cup of coffee.

View this post on Instagram

Introducing… The Super Dough Holder! 🍩

A post shared by Dunkin’ (@dunkin) on Apr 1, 2019 at 5:07am PDT

20. Auntie Anne’s kind of lazily announced pretzel shop yoga with a picture of a woman sitting cross-legged, holding two pretzels.

View this post on Instagram

Join us in our new hybrid pretzel shop hot yoga studios today! Nom nom namaste. Link in bio

A post shared by Auntie Anne's (@auntieannespretzels) on Apr 1, 2019 at 6:03am PDT

21. Dippin’ Dots announced a new roll-on deodorant but, unfortunately, it appears they only spent about 30 seconds on an AWFUL Photoshop job.

Smell the fun! Starts out colorful, stays on cool. pic.twitter.com/A4SlyhZAyR

— Dippin' Dots (@DippinDots) April 1, 2019

22. And finally, Starbucks announced Pupbucks, a store for dogs. The video they made for it isn’t close to as funny as they think it is . . . quote, “I have a whole grain beagle for a good boy.” Nope.

We're so excited to announce our newest concept stores: Starbucks for your best fur-iend. #Pupbucks pic.twitter.com/xgAEn0Dxss

— Starbucks Coffee (@Starbucks) April 1, 2019

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#April Fools Day #brands #pranks

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dabdabin-blog · 6 years

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hello everyone !! i’m really really EXCITEd to be here & roleplay with everyone but ?? also a nervous wreck since this is my first time rping on tumblr. pls. if i’m not doing things right, yEll at me, i need some guidance. my name is joo, 21 years old & living in the kst tz & i go by the pronouns she/her ! if interested in plotting, tap that heart or slide through my dms! if you prefer discord hit me up here ; yeoubi#7420 !!

[ muse u ] did you see [ yoon dabin ] at the store the other day? they remind me of [ cha eunwoo ] at first glance. can you really believe they’re [ twenty ] you know, this is a small town, so i know they’ve been here for [ twenty years ]. i think [ he ] is a [ lifeguard ]? i admire them a lot, i heard [ holding onto gravity by nell ] from their headphones. music taste really tells a lot about a person, huh. wait, i’m sure i saw them [ skim boarding ] around town!

SNEAK PEAKS ABOUT DABIN !!

to !! start off my boy ?? he is THE pretty boy that lives in a sand dune. his house is technically buried under sand ( if you think about it in a pretty way it’s like a magic beachy hobbit hole- ). kudos to his parent for being a bigger beach bum than dabin is to have bought the house for honeymoon.

he was born in bikini bottoms ( and probably bury his bones there ). with high influence from his parents, dabin always been out on the beach during his free time, ending up to be the walking definition of a beach bum.

he always leaves lil bits of sand where ever he goes ( like a lil beach fairy ? ).

never been the most social and popular type but neither was he unlikable. had few close friends he hung out with even if the location was not by the water. despite everyone knowing who dabin is did not mean, many have properly talked to him before. it wasn’t that he was shy but he is just very hard to catch in person when he spends most of the time riding the waves.

according to his friends, everyone should be grateful that they never met the real dabin because he is lame. always expect dabin to be pulling the lamest joke in the worst timing. to his defense- at least he had the kindest soul in town ( dabin’s own unpopular opinion ).

as soon as he graduated from high school, he jumped straight into becoming a lifeguard at the beach. ( after all, he can proudly say it is his turf. ) his parents were proud of him, supporting their boy in doing what he wanted to do. his grandparents however, disapproved of his decision saying “it’s stupid to put that smart brain of yours into waste”. after all they were hoping at least their grandchild would either become a doctor or a lawyer. he did have the grades for it after all.

for someone who works out in the sun all day, he isn’t tan with how often he reapplies sunscreen.

he could lose his job but SOMETIMES he decides to be high and be wasted on the beach time to time.

really. only thing he asks of people is to not blast music so loud near the lifeguard stand. it’s a safety hazard.

this is not much but !! pls shower my lil dabin w love. i swear he is not as boring as he seems to be-

#bubbleintro #ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh #i hope i'm doing things right ? ?? ?

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huangels · 6 years

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➧ 85 questions

tagged by: @jencto ty my love! ♡

rules: answer these 85 statements about yourself, then tag 20 people @ohdaddy-nct @dcyoungs @rxnjuns @reunjun @angelita-gordita @taeybear @taezhu @lycheechann and all who wants to do!! (only if u want too bbs)

↳ Last…?

1. drink ─ hot burning coffee that i almost spilled while driving to class bc it’s pouring outside

2. phone call ─ laura (my friend who just graduated high school !!)

3. text message ─ my mom (telling me to drive safe in the rain uwu)

4. song you listened to ─ jump by shinee (the album = a whole ass bop)

5. time you cried ─ oof i cry for the lamest and dumbest reasons but last night i was looking at nct fanart and i saw a cute ass noren one where jeno was dressed in a big moomin costume and wished renjun a good day w/ a ballon and it was all hella cute and shit lemme find it i rb on my personal (THIS ONE) it was,, so cute,, i actually cried,,

↳ Ever…?

6. dated someone twice ─ oof i rarely date let alone the same person twice lmao yikes

7. kissed someone and regretted it ─ i kissed this huge asshole in high school for a dare and he wouldn’t stop saying we had sex for a whole ass week,, this is why i dont date

8. been cheated on ─ nope

9. lost someone special ─ yeah but that’s the circle of life i guess :(

10. been depressed ─ oof did you mean: my four years of high school

11. gotten drunk and thrown up ─ uhh psh no i don’t drink underaged,,, mhm

12. fave colors ─ WARM TONES!! nudes (skin colors), maroon/burgendy (just like a dark bloody red), rose gold/dusty pink (the light shade of pink but not pastel), black (just bc), royal blue (the only cool toned color i like idhhdh)

↳ In the last year have you…

15. made new friends ─ yO making new friends is my middle name (i love making new friends !!)

16. fallen out of love ─ i’ve never BEEN in love...

17. laughed until you cried ─ if it’s after midnight, anything will make me laugh and cry (also i laugh at everything so yes)

18. found out someone was talking about you ─ lmao hell yeah high school drama everyone was out for me bc i look like a bitch and people are so quick to judge ://

19. met someone who changed you ─ umm not really everyone’s pretty chill. my roommate, who’s also like my best friend, is a huge party addict so she brings me to many parties, so i guess i’m more out there ? idk moving on

20. found out who your friends are ─ literally once i graduated high school and went to college, all of the snakes just left and now i’m surrounded by my real friends uwu :^] why tf is everything related to high school i don't wanna remember that

21. kissed someone on your facebook friends list ─ bruh i only have facebook so i can get extra rewards on iphone games ksjkdj

↳ General

22. how many of your facebook friends do you know irl ─ refer to #21

23. do you have any pets ─ i, myself, don’t have one bc i live in a dorm, but back at home, i have a doggo. she’s a thai ridgeback and her name is 巧克力 (qiao ke li = chocolate) and i miss her vv much :’))

24. do you want to change your name ─ for the most part no, i like my name, but when people call me ‘ran-you’ or something of the sort, i question why i live in america

25. what did you do for your last birthday ─ i traveled around china alone (well with my two friends back in china) without my parents for the first time bc i was an Adult™ now

26. what time did you wake up today ─ i was supposed to wake up at 8am but i didn't roll out of bed until 8:30am but hey, i made it to my 9am class 10 minutes early somehow

27. what were you doing at midnight last night ─ looking at nct fanart on tumblr and wishing that i coud draw/paint like that :’))

28. what is something you can’t wait for ─ my trip to spain!! i’m traveling to spain for 2 weeks with my friend at the end of june to july and i’m so excited bc i haven’t hung out w/ him in forever

30. what are you listening to right now ─ i’m in my accounting 2 class rn,,, so my professor lecturing about debits and credits (yes i know i should be paying attention but i’m an independent learner so i prefer reading the textbook and taking notes,, i’m just here bc attendance is graded)

31. have you ever talked to a person named tom ─ my old high school teacher whose first lecture was about corn and how it’s in EVERYTHING that is mass- produced today,,, well his full name is actually thomas

32. something that’s getting on your nerves ─ it was raining as i was walking to class and even though i had an umbrella, somehow my pants are still all drenched and this lecture room is SO DAMN COLD and i’m shivering someone save ME

33. most visited website ─ my school website lol

34. hair colour ─ jet black but in the sun it turns reddish brown ?

35. long or short hair ─ super long, it reaches my waist lol

36. do you have a crush on someone ─ does renjun count? jk kinda ?? but not really bc,, idk dating doesn’t really act as a major objective for me right now

37. what do you like about yourself ─ friendliness and outgoingness ?

38. want any piercings? ─ oof i already have a lot but i want more yes (i have 3 on both my lobes, 1 on my both cartilages, and on my right ear i have a snug ? is that what it’s called idk) lowkey highkey i wanna pierce my nose but we’ll see

39. blood type ─ o

40. nicknames ─ all nicknames i’ve ever gotten: ren, renu (my baby cousin calls me that bc she can barely pronounce words), fish..., nyu, rennie, r, human fish, + many puns on my name

41. relationship status ─ single and tired

42. zodiac ─ scorpio

43. pronouns ─ she/her

44. fave tv shows ─ the office, black mirror, we bare bears, law and order, futurama, stranger things, bob’s burgers, bate’s motel, american horror story (i love the duality between cartoons and fucked up shows dsdkjh)

45. tattoos ─ i want ones !! (prob small in hidden places) but um maybe once i graduate undergrad at least

46. right or left handed ─ right handed

47. ever had surgery ─ no - kinda? i have a scar on my eyelid bc when i was like 3-4 y/o, i was playing hide and seek w/ my uncle and cousin in china and i was running around and i turned quickly around a counter the same height as me and the corner of the counter cut open my eyelid,, this is kinda tmi but i was so stunned bc blood was running literally out of my eye so i didn’t even cry, i just stood there like ‘oh...that’s a lot of blood...’ i went to the ER to get it stitched up but idk if that counts as surgery :p

48. piercings ─ refer to #38

49. sport ─ currently i play volleyball and basketball for club, but played a lot in high school too

50. vacation ─ anywhere i love traveling !! also east asian,, mostly just china i miss my friends and family :’))

51. trainers ─ ?? uhh as in shoes? or the gym? idk,,

↳ More general

52. eating ─ as in what i ate today? if so, a bagel and a boiled egg for breakfast

53. drinking ─ coffee that’s now cold rip

54. i’m about to watch ─ uhh my professor continue talking about accounting and economics

55. waiting for ─ this class to end so i can eat lunch

56. want ─ a change of pants bc i’M WET AND COLD

57. get married ─ i sure hope so

58. career ─ i want to start and own a fashion brand/company/line (i’m double majoring in international business and trade + leadership management right now)

↳ Which is better

59. hugs or kisses ─ both i just want affection ;((

60. lips or eyes ─ these are hard to pick but eyes !

61. shorter or taller ─ taller even though i’m pretty tall as it is

62. older or younger ─ older or the same age ? (rip sorry renjun)

63. nice arms or stomach ─ arms? i need you to be able to put me in a chokehold and KO me (not in a kinky way,,, maybe,,,)

64. hookup or relationship ─ relationship duh ?

65. troublemaker or hesitant ─ team too-lazy-to-be-either

↳ Have you ever

66. kissed a stranger ─ uhh prob not

67. drank hard liquor ─ no officer i don’t drink underaged mhm

68. lost glasses ─ i literally have like 6 pairs of glasses that i keep thinking i’ve lost but then find it again

69. turned someone down ─ oof yeah sorry

70. sex on first date ─ no i have standards

71. broken someone’s heart ─ i hope not ! at least not intentionally

72. had your heart broken ─ prob once or twice

73. been arrested ─ in my good christian household?! (i’m not even christian tf)

74. cried when someone died ─ well of course i have a heart

75. fallen for a friend ─ all my friends are hot as fuck no lie

↳ Do you believe in…?

76. yourself ─ always :D !!

77. miracles ─ eh,,

78. love at first sight ─ maybe not LOVE but something similar

79. santa claus ─ i-is he not real... (i’m kidding dbksj)

80. kiss on a first date ─ sure why not

81. angels ─ renjun is a walking angel on earth

↳ Other

82. best friend’s name ─ vincent, alyssa (my two fave people)

83. eye colour ─ dark poop brown

84. fave movie ─ i watch too many to have 1 favorite but for the sake of this tag, i’ll say coraline

85. fave actor ─ i have a big gay crush on dilraba dilmurat also tom holland

el fin

#tags #personal #this is such a long post sorry mobile users ifhdihs #uhh ignore typos i'm in class #honestly this is so much info about me wow #i'm not very interesting or funny tho so #yall prov just gonna scroll pass its OK lol #YALL DILRABA IS SO FUCKING HOT AND CUTE I LOVE HER #google her if yall don't know smh

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saddragonfire · 3 years

Text

21 Questions: Halloween Edition

1. Do you celebrate Halloween?

That would be a HELL yes

2. What do you think is the best costume for Halloween?

Anything scary and/or original

3. How old is too old to go trick-or-treating?

Is that really a thing? xD

4. Do you think Halloween is scary?

I don’t think anything is scary enough

5. What would an alien think of humans if it came to Earth and saw Halloween?

They would probably laugh and report back that there was no intelligent life on the planet

6. What do you think the black and orange colors of Halloween mean?

There is a long history with Samhain and other aspects but I won’t bore you. It’s officially unofficially official.

7. What do you think about Halloween?

I think that it’s the best time of the year, not to mention the day my Bassy Babe was born.

8. What’s the best Halloween movie you’ve seen?

I LITERALLY cannot pick a single one, there are too many amazing ones.

9. What is your preferred method for eating candy corn?

Yellow, Orange, White. Fight me.

10. If you owned a Halloween costume shop, which costumes would you sell?

Anything scary or gory

11. Which is the strangest Halloween costume you have ever seen?

I don’t know about strangest, but the lamest one was a girl that wrapped herself in caution tape. She didn’t even have an explanation for her costume, just.. wrapped in caution tape.

12. Where do you usually buy your Halloween costumes?

I usually put my costumes together.

13. What wouldn’t you like to get on a trick-or-treat?

A toothbrush -le sigh-

14. Do you decorate your house for Halloween?

Hell to the yes

15. What is your favorite Halloween party food?

C’mon guys, you know me, if it’s food then it’s my favorite, don’t make me pick one xD

16. Can you describe your ideal Halloween party?

Haunted, scary, TONS of food

17. Have you ever bobbed for apples?

Oh yes, though you don’t see it as often as you’d think

18. Do you believe in ghosts?

Definitely

19. Do you prefer homemade or store-bought costumes?

Homemade

20. Do you prefer friendly or scary pumpkins?

I’m a scary sorta Demon Queen ;D

21. Do you prefer the face paint and make-up or the costumes best?

One can only go so far without the other, I like to dive deep into both

22. What would you do if a trick or treater got a nasty attitude?

Depends, if they are little (and just grumpy) give them candy and send them on their way, I’m not their parent

23. What's the best Halloween activity?

Haunted Houses

24. What's the most scared you've ever been?

It wasn’t Halloween related and... slightly inappropriate for this medium

25. Who would you like to haunt and why?

My little Temper Tantrum (she will hate it xD)

26. What's the best song for Halloween?

Do those tracks of scary sounds count?

27. Do you save the seeds from the pumpkin to eat or to plant?

Nope, I give the to my twin and he bakes them

28. Do you bake pumpkin seeds in the oven?

Nope, again, that’s Nono’s territory

29. Trick or treat?

Why choose? But I never pass on a treat

30. Are witches around nowadays?

Definitely

31. Which famous person would you like to go trick-or-treating with, and why?

The Rock. Can you imagine how many bags full of candy that dude could carry?

32. Ghost hunting programs on TV - Are they real or fake?

Most of them, Fake.

33. What would you do if you saw a ghost?

I’d actually be a little sad that this poor soul got stuck

34. What is your all-time favorite scary monster or creature of the night?

I still think that Freddie is one of my favorite. He’s impossible to beat. No one can stay awake forever.

35. What is your favorite kind of treat? What kind of treat would you be disappointed to receive?

At the moment, I can’t get enough Whoppers. I’m always bummed when I get gumdrops.

#task243 #misctask

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xfilescat · 7 years

Text

lights (steve harrington x henderson!reader)

word count: 2.4k

warnings: completely rushed and not proofread! but nothing else.

preview: it’s 12:21 am on christmas eve and i’m too lazy to find a part of this to be the preview so basically this is just fluff i’m sorry

A/N: this is sososo rushed and i’m so sorry it’s so short and bad but I really wanted to post something for christmas! merry christmas if you celebrate it, my friends! ily :)

You’ve never been so glad that it’s Friday in your entire life. Since it’s late December and Christmas break starts Monday, your teachers have been inundating you with lengthy papers, research projects, and unit exams in a last-ditch attempt to get some more numbers in the grade book. You don’t know how you survived all of that on top of everything that happened back in November, but somehow you made it through without injury and with (most of) your sanity. You’ve been half channel-surfing, half cat-napping since you got home a few hours ago, and you’re in the middle of one of said naps when your little brother strides into the room.

“Y/N?”

When you don’t respond, Dustin walks over and shakes your shoulder. “Y/N!”

“Five more minutes,” you mutter, rolling over so your face is pressed into the back of the couch.

“You’ve been lying there for four hours.”

“Not long enough.”

“There were a couple times where you were so out cold that I considered checking your pulse to make sure you weren’t dead.”

“‘To die, to sleep—to sleep, perchance to dream….’”

“What?”

“Hamlet,” you murmur, pulling the old afghan hanging over the back of the couch onto your head.

He chuckles. “You’re the only person I know who quotes Shakespeare when she’s half asleep.”

“Thanks.”

“That wasn’t even a compli—you know what? Nevermind. I have a question.” He lifts the blanket off of you. With a heavy sigh, you stretch languidly and sit up to face him. You notice that he’s wringing his hands like he only does when he’s nervous. That’s kind of a red flag: the last time he was anxious about telling you something, you ended up learning about the Upside Down and all of the horrors that came along with it. This can’t be about that, can it? You sit up taller.

“Do you—do you wanna come drive around and look at Christmas lights?”

You let out a breath you didn’t even realize you’d been holding in. “Wait, really? That’s it?”

His face, which had been adorned by a cautiously hopeful expression, falls instantly. “It’s stupid, I know. You don’t have to come.”

You rush to correct yourself. “Oh, no, Dustin, that’s not what I meant at all! No, I definitely want to go. You just caught me by surprise.”

He sighs in relief. “Oh, okay, good. Do you remember how we used to do it every year?”

You nod, smiling softly. Driving around to see all of the lights used to be your favorite family tradition. You’d each bring a blanket, squeeze into the front seat of your father’s pickup truck, and cruise around town listening to Christmas music and taking in each house’s decor. The heater didn’t work well in the truck, which necessitated the blankets, but you don’t remember ever being cold. In fact, those drives were some of the only times everything felt completely warm and peaceful in your family: mom and dad didn’t argue and you and Dustin didn’t bicker like siblings usually do. All you did was listen to the music and look at the lights, and it always made you feel like everything might just turn out alright. You miss that feeling more than you can ever admit to your mother.

After your dad left, she rushed to make everything feel normal again by filling your lives with distractions, like a new cat named Mews or hockey lessons for Dustin or countless books for you. Old family traditions that would never be the same without your father, however, were a lot harder to distract from, so they were replaced by new ones. Thus, the annual drives became annual Christmas movie nights when the three of you would stay up past midnight curled up on the couch in front of the TV.

Dustin was only 7 when this shift occurred, so while you knew that dad leaving hit him hard, you never realized that he might miss the old times just as much as you do. You found it highly unlikely that your mom would want to take you guys out, though. While you know she’d do anything for you two, you remember asking to go out on the drive before the first Christmas with just the three of you. She said the car was acting up and quickly turned on “Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer” and you decided not to ask again. She was going through enough and you didn’t want to force her into anything that might make her sad. “Who’s gonna take us, Dustin? I’m a terrible driver when there’s even the littlest bit of snow on the ground, and mom’s not gonna want to go.”

“I know, I know. Steve said he’d take us.”

Once again, Dustin surprises you. “Wait, what? Really?”

“Yeah, I was telling him about how we used to go and how I still wanted to, and he said he’d take me. I said he didn’t have to, but he insisted.”

“That’s… wow, that’s so nice of him.”

You hate to say it now, but when you caught your brother and Steve in the backyard in front of the basement door, you’d doubted that the notorious Steve Harrington would be the type of guy to step up and be a selfless hero. However, you quickly learned that he protected everybody, from kids he didn’t know at all to the girl he’d only talked to once in eleventh grade to ask for a pencil. It was right around the second time he saved your life that you realized you were laughably wrong about him: he was selfless and he was heroic and geez, you’d never let yourself accept just how attractive he was, but now it was all you could think about.

Further, he’d become a sort of mentor to Dustin, the kind of guide that an older sister couldn’t really be for her younger brother. He drove Dustin around, he gave him advice, and he still hung out with your brother’s friends even though everything had gone back to normal. You hung out with them, too, and that’s how you and Steve had become close. You were still a little shy around him, though, partly because you’re always nervous around boys and partly because of your growing crush on him.

“Hey, he’s here,” Dustin calls, snapping you out of it. He hurries over to the door and tugs on his coat and shoes.

You stand up and bite your lip, suddenly nervous. “Dustin, are you sure it won’t be weird if I come? I mean, I know Steve’s my friend too and all, but if you guys want this to be just the two of you, I’d understand.”

He looks at you quizzically. “I definitely want you to come. And also, Steve asked me to ask you. Like, multiple times.”

Yeah, right. You scoff. “Not even.”

“Even! C’mon, Y/N, get a grip. Let’s go.” He tosses you your jacket and you slowly put it on before walking over to grab your shoes.

As you and Dustin cross the front lawn towards Steve’s car, your heart races. If Steve did ask for you “multiple times,” what the hell does that mean? Does he actually like you back? The possibility had crossed your mind a few times but you’d always written it off. It was too unlikely, you told yourself. Too good to be true. Especially considering how obviously in love with Nancy Wheeler he’d been just a few weeks ago. Feelings don’t change that fast, do they?

Well, yours had when you realized that Steve wasn’t a bad guy after all. Plus, you catch him staring at you a lot more often than people usually stare at casual friends, and there was that one time when El called you pretty and you shook your head and Steve looked at you like you were crazy and assured you it was true, and he also puts his arm around you while he walks you to class sometimes… Damn, maybe he does like you. The very thought gives you an inexplicable urge to squeal and jump up and down like a schoolgirl with a crush. You stifle that urge and pull open the passenger door, sliding inside.

“Hey, Hendersons,” Steve says with a grin.

“Hey, Harrington,” Dustin responds as he climbs into the back seat.

“Hi, Steve,” you say. “Thanks a lot for doing this. You really didn’t have to.”

Steve shakes his head as he shifts the car into gear and pulls away from the curb. “You kidding? I wanted to. I love Christmas.”

Dustin leans forward. “Me too! You believe Lucas said he likes Thanksgiving more than Christmas?”

“What? Seriously?”

“Yeah! I could understand if he said Halloween, but Thanksgiving? Lamest holiday ever.”

“Damn right it is.”

The boys continue to chat as you fasten your seatbelt and make yourself comfortable. Steve’s car is a lot warmer than your dad’s truck ever was, and the music’s set to perfect listening volume: just loud enough to hear, but soft enough to be conducive to conversation. You lean back against the headrest and gaze out the window as Steve cruises slowly through your neighborhood.

“So, Y/N/N,” he says when there’s a lull in his conversation with Dustin, “how are you?”

You look over at him with a smile. “Just fine. How are you?”

“Can’t complain. You happy to be on break?”

You laugh. “Happy’s an understatement. Did I tell you Mrs. Wilson gave us a 6 page paper on Monday that was due today?” Rolling your eyes, you turn back to the window. “I don’t think I slept once this week.”

“Now that’s just cruel.”

“Right? I almost cried when she assigned—oh! Look! Guys, look!” You point excitedly out the window when you spot a particularly decked-out colonial. “The McGills really go all out, don’t they? There must be a million lights on there.” You stare at the house in awe. You kinda feel like a little kid again, so excited over something so simple. It’s a beautiful feeling.

“Woah, that’s awesome!” Dustin slides over to your side of the car. “That must’ve taken them forev—hey, Steve, watch it!”

Steve curses and makes a sharp left, narrowly avoiding the McGills’ mailbox. “Sorry, sorry.”

You giggle. “Don’t worry. You’re still a better driver than me.”

“Everyone’s a better driver than you,” he replies with a smirk.

You raise your eyebrows and you’re about to defend yourself when Dustin speaks up first. “Yeah, yeah. Next time, keep your eyes on the road and off my sister.”

You feel your face heat up. Heart pounding, you fix your gaze out the window again. Any residual doubt that he likes you back shrinks even smaller.

“I was looking at the lights, dickhead,” Steve mutters as he turns onto a main road, staring just as pointedly at the street in front of him as you are at the scenery outside. “Sure,” Dustin teases.

Nobody says anything for a little while, and in the beginning, it’s awkward and tense. Then, you look at Steve at the same time he looks at you and you both smile (him sheepishly, you shyly) and suddenly the silence is much more comfortable. He drives through a couple more neighborhoods and the three of you start ranking each house on a scale from one to ten, ten being the most Christmas-y.

“That’s a ten for sure,” you joke when you pass a house on your left with one measly string of lights wrapped lazily around a single tree.

“Oh, definitely. That’s festive as hell,” Steve agrees.

You look back to ask Dustin what he thinks, but you hold your tongue when you see how happy he looks. He’s looking out to the right with a soft smile on his face, mouthing the words to Judy Garland’s “Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas.” You almost want to cry: you haven’t seen him this at peace in far too long, and now you’re even more grateful to Steve than you were before.

It’s around 9:30 when Steve brings you back home. “Thanks for taking us out, Steve,” Dustin says as he opens his door, grinning brightly.

Steve grins back. “No problem, man. And hey, if I don’t see you again this weekend, merry Christmas.”

“Merry Christmas to you, too. You coming, Y/N?”

You nod. “Go ahead, I’ll be right there.”

When your brother shuts the door and starts making his way toward the house, you turn to Steve. He’s already looking at you. You feel yourself blush again. “Thank you so much for doing this. It definitely made my day and I know it meant the world to Dustin. You’re a really great guy, you know that?”

Steve looks down and you can see that he’s blushing slightly, too. “Oh, please.”

“No, really! I think you’re the best thing that’s ever happened to my brother.”

He meets your eyes. “Seriously?”

“Seriously.”

“That’s… that’s great.”

You smile. “I’m surprised you didn’t know that already. You don’t think highly enough of yourself, Harrington.”

His face lights up and your heart flutters. Neither of you say anything for a long moment, but then you remember you told Dustin you were on your way in. “I should probably get going,” you say as you climb out of the car. Once you’re outside, you duck back down and shoot him a grin. “Goodnight, Steve.”

He smiles softly. “Night.”

You’re halfway up your front lawn when you hear Steve’s window open. “Y/N/N, wait!”

You turn around and walk back over. “What’s up?”

Steve leans out of the car. “Do you have plans for New Years? I was thinking of having some people over, and I don’t know, maybe that could be like our first date.”

You freeze. “Are you—are you asking me out?”

He smirks. “That depends on your answer.”

“What if I say yes?”

“Then yes, I’m asking you out.”

“Okay, then yes.”

“Great. So I’ll call you later.”

“Sure, sounds good.”

“Nice. Goodnight!”

“Goodnight!”

You can’t believe that just happened. It’s like the perfect ending to an already wonderful night. You slowly start making your way back to your house, but something makes you hesitate. With a deep breath, you turn around and run back to Steve’s car. “I forgot something,” you say. Before he can ask what, you lean in and gently press a kiss to his cheek. When you pull back, you notice he’s got the same awestruck look on his face as he did before. “Merry Christmas,” you whisper.

He seems to be speechless for a moment. “Merry Christmas,” he finally says, smiling softly. “You should forget things more often.”

You giggle. “Goodnight for real this time.”

“Goodnight for real this time,” he repeats. “Now go get some sleep.”

#steve harrington x reader #steve harrington #steve harrington reader insert #stranger things #merry xmas

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darhwolf · 7 years

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Random questions

1. Do you bite or lick ice cream? 2. What is home to you? 3. What was the last lie you told? 4. Does everyone deserve the truth? 5. What is the creepiest toy ever made? 6. Describe a moment in which you did something unacceptable in a bad situation. 7. List two things that are more easily done than said. (No, I didn't mix them up.) 8. When was the last time you worked really hard to achieve something? 9. How many all nighters have you pulled? 10. If humans didn't evolve to laugh or smile, how would we express our happiness instead? 11. How many romantic "things" or "flings" have you had? 12. What is your paradise? 13. What is your favorite background noise? (Ex. Water dripping, people talking.) 14. How many hearts do you think you have broken? 15. What is the most important thing about electronics? What does this say about you? 16. Why do people care about celebrities? Do you care about celebrities? 17. What is the most annoying thing someone can do to you? 18. Do you overexaggerate? What are the pros and cons of this? 19. Have you played any instruments before? Which instruments? 20. Do you like taking selfies? Why or why not? 21. List 3 things you like about yourself? 22. What is the best advice someone has ever given you? 23. Do you have what it takes to raise a child? Why or why not? 24. How do you cheer yourself up after a bad day? 25. When was the last time you felt awkward? 26. Are you introverted or extroverted? Or a mixture of both? 27. What constitutes a good friend? 28. Would you rather have a lot of friends to hang out with or just one best friend? 29. In a regular day, what do you not want to hear? 30. What is your dream job? 31. Is it better to be lazy but smart or hardworking but unintelligent? 32. What is a truth about yourself that others find hard to believe? 33. What have you always wondered about the other gender? 34. Which fantasy world would you like to visit the most? 35. Describe the worst friend you have ever befriended. 36. Imagine that you have switched bodies with someone you don't know. You can't switch back. What do you do? 37. If you found the recipe for immortality, would you sell it or would you burn it? 38. What is the most important, applicable class you have ever taken? 39. Name the last book you read. 40. Imagine that you are unable to express emotion. How would this affect your world? 41. When was the last time you made the first move? 42. What is your opinion on electronic music such as dubstep or trap? 43. What was the last movie you watched? 44. Do you like and appreciate your life? 45. Do you like and appreciate yourself? 46. When was the last time you cried? 47. What are you scared of? 48. What is the most embarrassing, cringe-worthy thing you have ever done? 49. What are some of your hobbies? 50. What is a superficial yet annoying mistake you constantly make? 51. Are you a good friend? What makes you a good friend? If not, what makes you a bad friend? 52. Do you honestly learn from your mistakes? 53. What have you learned the hard way? 54. What is the most important thing to have in order to attain happiness? 55. Which medium do you use for expressing your artistic emotions? (Singing, writing, etc.) 56. Are you a creative or a logical thinker? 57. What is the smartest thing you have ever done? 58. What is your ideal meal? 59. What is the worst thing someone could do on a date? 60. Do you like animals? Which kind is your favorite? 61. If you could turn one legal thing illegal, what would it be? 62. Do you have any guilty pleasures? 63. What is the best thing that the internet has ever created? 64. Do you like playing video games? Which video games? 65. What is your opinion on beauty in today's society? 66. Are you a morning person? When do you usually wake up? 67. Do you have a favorite Disney movie? Character? 68. Would you rather live in the city or in the countryside? 69. Would you rather live near the ocean or in the mountains? 70. What are the best things about winter? 71. What scares you most about the future? 72. What makes you feel old? 73. How many hours do you spend on the computer or phone on average? 74. What are some of your New Year's resolutions? 75. What is your life story in 6 words? 76. Describe yourself in one word. 77. What bad habits do you do? 78. What genre of music do you listen to? 79. Most prominent childhood memory? 80. Imagine if you had an older brother. If you already have one, what is it like? If you don't, how would this change your life? 81. Spirit animal? 82. Do you believe in horoscopes? 83. What is the worst advice you've ever been given? 84. List the 3 most important people in your life right now. 85. Favorite memory of your family. 86. What do you look for in a relationship? 87. Do you have a role model? Why or why not? 88. What is your opinion on social media? 89. Are you a pessimist or an optimist? 90. List some things that you think are overpriced? 91. What is your worst memory or creepiest experience? 92. What superpower would ruin the world? 93. What is something you swore you would never do when you grew up, but you did anyway? 94. What lessons have you learned from movies and which movies were they? 95. If you could travel anywhere, where would you go? 96. How do you approach people? 97. What is your opinion on first impressions? 98. What are some things you did as a child that you no longer do? 99. What languages can you speak? 100. What do you think society will be like in 30 years? 101. What do you do on your lazy days? 102. What ended your last relationship? 103. Favorite food? 104. What is the most terrifying dream you've ever had? 105. When was the last time you got seriously angry? 106. What was the last friendship you broke? 107. Do you have any pet peeves? 108. Who was the last person you gave a hug to? 109. When was the last time you got seriously stressed? 110. What part of your personality do you want to change? 111. Who is the most positively influential person in your life right now? 112. What is your biggest motivation? 113. What did you want to be when you were little? 114. What are some things that you are good at? 115. What is one thing you want to be good at? 116. What distracts you the most, especially when you're trying to work? 117. How important is privacy to you? 118. If you could create one social norm, what would it be? 119. What's the craziest lie you've ever told? 120. What story do you like to tell about yourself at parties? 121. What is the lamest thing that you have seen someone do? 122. What is the stupidest thing you've done to impress someone? 123. What is your morning routine? 124. What's the last thing you did that is worth remembering? 125. If karma was coming back to you, would it help or hurt you? 126. What is your opinion on playing "hard to get?" 127. What are the pros and cons of straightforward? 128. What do you consider "leading" someone on? 129. Are you the friendzoner or the friendzoned? 130. What do you admire most about your friends? 131. What do you admire most about your family? 132. What is your opinion on "going with the flow?" 133. Do you enjoy talking or listening? 134. When is it time to end a friendship? 135. What is the worst excuse you've ever come up with? 136. If GPA didn't matter, what courses would you have taken? 137. What are your favorite baby names? 138. When was the last time you had a deep conversation with someone? 139. What instantly ruins a conversation? 140. Biggest turn ons and turn on offs. 141. Biggest disappointment. 142. Do you have any self-restraint? 143. When did you last do something outside of your comfort zone? 144. Prized possession(s)? 145. What is your opinion on second chances? 146. Text or call? 147. What do you like about the 21st century? 148. What advice would you give to yourself 5 years ago? 149. How organized are you? 150. Favorite mode of transportation.

@annoyinglyoptimisticbread GO!

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takemeawaytocamelot · 7 years

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Because I’m Bored At Work

#ask me anything #please #seriously

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pocketrandys · 7 years

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tagged by @burglethyturts!! thank you katherine~!!

Rules: answer these 92 statements and tag 20 people

(a lot of numbers are skipped im sorry fjj;nsnddgaljfsl;a..)

Last:

1. drink: water

2. phone call: my super best friend

3. text message: also my super best friend

4. song you listened to: Forever Summer Holiday by Kero Kero Bonito (a JAM)

5. Time you cried: um....... like four days ago thinking about kenny mccormick

Have You:

6. dated someone twice: nope

7. kissed someone and regretted it: nope

8. been cheated on: nope

9. lost someone special: not really

10. been depressed: not beyond a normal level

11. gotten drunk and thrown up: nope. fuck im boring

List three favorite colors:

12-14. pale pink, yellow, soft green

In the last year have you:

15 Made new friends: yeah!!

17. laughed until you cried: sure thing!

18. found out someone was talking about you: not yet.........................

19. met someone who changed you: nnnnnnnah

20. found out who your friends are: YES honey i’ve already unfriended people on facebook

21. kissed someone on your facebook list: nope

General:

22. How many of your facebook friends do you know in real life: all of them; ig and tumblr are for online friends!

23. do you have any pets: two cats!

24. do you want to change your name: nah i like my name

25. what did you do for your last birthday: took my best friends to Medieval Times Dinner and Tournament and then we went back to my house and watched Sharknado

26. what time do you wake up: on a school day, 6. weekend, 10

27. what were you doing at midnight last night: texting @stanfiction about creek

28. name something you can’t wait for: the FUCKING FRACTURED BUT WHOLE I THINK ABOUT IT EVERY DAY AND THE EXCITEMENT HAS STARTED MANIFESTING ITSELF INTO A PHYSICAL ENERGY

29. when was the last time you saw your mom: two hours ago when she went to bed

30. what is one thing you wish you could change in your life? i wish i lived closer to my Super Best Friend; i love my house and location a whole lot actually but i always miss her and making plans sucks

31. what are you listening to right now: Anxiety Online by Blank Banshee

32. have you ever talked to a person named Tom: yep.

33. something that is getting on your nerves: this hoe at my school

34. most visited site: this one and youtube

Random Info:

35. moles: i have a beauty mark on my chin :>

36. marks: i have big freckles on my shoulder area and legs and a metric fuck ton of mosquito bites at all times

37. childhood dream: i wanted to be a famous singer

38. hair color: light brown but it gets blonde if i’m in the sun a lot and i Do Not like it

39. long or short hair: its slightly past my shoulders and i want it a lot shorter

40. do you have a crush on someone: isnt that a great question\

41. what do you like about yourself: i like my general outlook on life as i’m fairly positive and enjoy most things in the world, and i’m content with my appearance

42. piercings: just my ears ^^

43. blood type: no idea i think like... A-

44. nickname: I respond to Syd, Sydford, Squid, or Cunt

45. relationship status: singel

46. zodiac: pisces sun, leo moon, gemini rising

47. pronouns: she/her

48. favorite tv show: South Park, Gravity Falls, Bojack Horseman, Rick and Morty

49. tattoos: don’t have any but i’d like a little scribbly flower outline on the front of each thigh

50. right or left handed: Left!

51. surgery: none so far

52. hair dyed a different color: i’ve had the ends dyed pink and turquoise (not at the same time), and i’ve had my bangs silver-blue and dark blue

53. sport: fuck no lol

54. favorite video game: i ower my entire life to Super Mario Galaxy

55. vacation: Japan is my only priority right now and eventually i’d like to go to South Korea, Ireland, and Iceland.

56. pair of trainers: i only wear flip flops and large clunky black shoes

More General:

57. eating: nothing rn

58. drinking: ^

59. I’m about to: slepe

61. waiting for: mThe fuckein............f..ractued but whole..

62. want: THEe FUCKIN...............................FRACTURED B

63. get married: at some point i would like to

64. career: i’d prefer to do something with japanese language, maybe work as an interpreter

Which Is Better:

65: hugs or kisses: depends on the person but i love hugs a lot

66: lips or eyes: eyes im always focused on people’s eyes

67. shorter or taller: i like being the shortest one of the group it tends to attract positive attention

68. older or younger: i prefer to be around people the same age as me or a year older

70. nice arms or nice stomach: nice stomach....gotta b soft

71. sensitive or loud: what

72. hook up or relationship: idk im like 10 years old lol

73. troublemaker or hesitant: hesitant

Have You Ever:

74. kissed a stranger: Nope

75. drank hard liquor: noo

76. lost glasses/contact lense: my eyes are Perfect.

77. turned someone down: yah

78. sex on the first date: i wouldnt no

79. broken someone’s heart: i doubt it i mean i’ve broken up with a guy but we were 14

80. had your heart broken. nope

81. been arrested: no i’m no heathen

82. cried when someone died: does my cat count

83. fallen for a friend: i’ve been infatuated with nearly all my friends at some point lol all of them are very attractive and funny

Do You Believe In:

84. yourself: Hell yea!

85. miracles: na

86. love at first sight: not really

87. santa claus: no

88. kiss on the first date: ya life is short do it

89. ghosts: not too much but i like to

Other

90. favorite fictional character: Kenny McCormick will literally always be my favorite character from anything ever

91. eye color: blue w a little yellow ring in the middle

92. favorite movie: probably Scott Pilgrim vs. The World

tagging... @fish-the-lamest @lyawesome32 @stanfiction @r3turntheslab @georgeharrison @danidery and whomever else would like to do this

#tag meme

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galwednesday · 7 years

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I’ve seen a lot of threads about boycotting Marvel (for extremely mysterious reasons unknown), and I love giving book recs, so here are some non-Marvel/DC comics to check out while we’re all waiting for Marvel to be less of a raging dumpster fire:

Series:

Lumberjanes, by Noelle Stevenson, Grace Ellis, Shannon Watters, Brooke A. Allen (Illustrator), published by BOOM! Box. (Middle grade/young adult.)

At Miss Qiunzilla Thiskwin Penniquiqul Thistle Crumpet's camp for hard-core lady-types, things are not what they seem. Three-eyed foxes. Secret caves. Anagrams. Luckily, Jo, April, Mal, Molly, and Ripley are five rad, butt-kicking best pals determined to have an awesome summer together... And they're not gonna let a magical quest or an array of supernatural critters get in their way! The mystery keeps getting bigger, and it all begins here.

Descender, by Jeff Lemire (Writer), Dustin Nguyen (Artist), Steve Wands (Letterer), published by Image.

Young Robot boy TIM-21 and his companions struggle to stay alive in a universe where all androids have been outlawed and bounty hunters lurk on every planet. Written by award-winning creator, Jeff Lemire, Descender is a rip-roaring and heart-felt cosmic odyssey. Lemire pits humanity against machine, and world against world, to create a sprawling epic. Created by Jeff Lemire (Sweet Tooth, Trillium) and Dustin Nguyen's (Little Gotham) critically acclaimed, bestselling new science fiction series!

Bitch Planet, by Kelly Sue DeConnick (Writer), Valentine De Landro (Artist), Robert Wilson IV (Artist), published by Image.

Eisner Award-nominated writer Kelly Sue DeConnick (Pretty Deadly, Captain Marvel) and Valentine De Landro (X-Factor) team up to bring you the premiere volume of Bitch Planet, a deliciously vicious riff on women-in-prison sci-fi exploitation. In a future just a few years down the road in the wrong direction, a woman's failure to comply with her patriarchal overlords will result in exile to the meanest penal planet in the galaxy. When the newest crop of fresh femmes arrive, can they work together to stay alive or will hidden agendas, crooked guards, and the deadliest sport on (or off!) Earth take them to their maker?

The Unwritten, by Mike Carey (Writer), Bill Willingham (Introduction), Peter Gross (Writer, Artist), published by Vertigo.

Tom Taylor's life was screwed from go. His father created the Tommy Taylor fantasy series, boy-wizard novels with popularity on par with Harry Potter. The problem is Dad modeled the fictional epic so closely to Tom's real life that fans are constantly comparing him to his counterpart, turning him into the lamest variety of Z-level celebrity. In the final novel, it's even implied that the fictional Tommy will crossover into the real world, giving delusional fans more excuses to harass Tom.

When an enormous scandal reveals that Tom might really be a boy-wizard made flesh, Tom comes into contact with a very mysterious, very deadly group that's secretly kept tabs on him all his life. Now, to protect his own life and discover the truth behind his origins, Tom will travel the world, eventually finding himself at locations all featured on a very special map -- one kept by the deadly group that charts places throughout world history where fictions have impacted and tangibly shaped reality, those stories ranging from famous literary works to folktales to pop culture. And in the process of figuring out what it all means, Tom will find himself having to figure out a huge conspiracy mystery that spans the entirety of the history of fiction.

Chew, by John Layman, Rob Guillory (Illustrator), published by Image.

Tony Chu is a detective with a secret. A weird secret. Tony Chu is Cibopathic, which means he gets psychic impressions from whatever he eats. It also means he's a hell of a detective, as long as he doesn't mind nibbling on the corpse of a murder victim to figure out whodunit, and why. He's been brought on by the Special Crimes Division of the FDA, the most powerful law enforcement agency on the planet, to investigate their strangest, sickest, and most bizarre cases.

The Wicked + The Divine, by Kieron Gillen, Jamie McKelvie (Illustrations), Matt Wilson (Colorist), Clayton Cowles, published by Image.

Every ninety years, twelve gods incarnate as humans. They are loved. They are hated. In two years, they are dead. The team behind critical tongue-attractors like Young Avengers and PHONOGRAM reunite to create a world where gods are the ultimate pop stars and pop stars are the ultimate gods. But remember: just because you’re immortal, doesn’t mean you’re going to live forever.

Sex Criminals, by Matt Fraction (Writer), Chip Zdarsky (Artist), published by Image.

Suzie’s just a regular gal with an irregular gift: when she has sex, she stops time. One day she meets Jon and it turns out he has the same ability. And sooner or later they get around to using their gifts to do what we’d ALL do: rob a couple banks. A bawdy and brazen sex comedy for comics begins here!

Paper Girls, by Brian K. Vaughan, Cliff Chiang (Illustrator), Matthew Wilson (Illustrator), published by Image.

In the early hours after Halloween of 1988, four 12-year-old newspaper delivery girls uncover the most important story of all time. Suburban drama and otherworldly mysteries collide in this smash-hit series about nostalgia, first jobs, and the last days of childhood.

Saga, by Brian K. Vaughan (Writer), Fiona Staples (Artist), published by Image.

When two soldiers from opposite sides of a never-ending galactic war fall in love, they risk everything to bring a fragile new life into a dangerous old universe. From bestselling writer Brian K. Vaughan, Saga is the sweeping tale of one young family fighting to find their place in the worlds. Fantasy and science fiction are wed like never before in this sexy, subversive drama for adults.

Single-volume:

American Born Chinese, by Gene Luen Yang, published by First Second. (Young adult.)

All Jin Wang wants is to fit in. When his family moves to a new neighborhood, he suddenly finds that he's the only Chinese American student at his school. Jocks and bullies pick on him constantly, and he has hardly any friends. Then, to make matters worse, he falls in love with an all-American girl... Born to rule over all the monkeys in the world, the story of the Monkey King is one of the oldest and greatest Chinese fables. Adored by his subjects, master of the arts of kung-fu, he is the most powerful monkey on earth. But the Monkey King doesn't want to be a monkey. He wants to be hailed as a god... Chin-Kee is the ultimate negative Chinese stereotype, and he's ruining his cousin Danny's life. Danny's a popular kid at school, but every year Chin-Kee comes to visit, and every year Danny has to transfer to a new school to escape the shame. This year, though, things quickly go from bad to worse... These three apparently unrelated tales come together with an unexpected twist, in a modern fable that is hilarious, poignant and action-packed.

Through the Woods, by Emily Carroll, published by Margaret K. McElderry Books.

'It came from the woods. Most strange things do.' Five mysterious, spine-tingling stories follow journeys into (and out of?) the eerie abyss. These chilling tales spring from the macabre imagination of acclaimed and award-winning comic creator Emily Carroll. Come take a walk in the woods and see what awaits you there...

Skim, by Mariko Tamaki, Jillian Tamaki (Illustrator), published by Groundwood Books. (Young adult/adult.)

Heartbreakingly funny, moving and vibrantly drawn, Skim is an extraordinary book--a smart and sensitive graphic novel of the highest literary and artistic quality, by and about young women. "Skim" is Kimberly Keiko Cameron, a not-slim, would-be Wiccan goth who goes to a private girls' school. When Skim's classmate Katie Matthews is dumped by her boyfriend, who then kills himself, the entire school goes into mourning overdrive. As concerned guidance counselors provide lectures on the "cycle of grief," and the popular clique starts a new club (Girls Celebrate Life!) to bolster school spirit, Skim sinks into an ever-deepening depression. And falling in love only makes things worse... Suicide, depression, love, being gay or not, crushes, cliques, and finding a way to be your own fully human self--are all explored in this brilliant collaboration by cousins Mariko and Jillian Tamaki. An edgy, keenly observed and poignant glimpse into the heartache of being young.

Prince of Cats, by Ron Wimberly, published by Vertigo.

A hip-hop retelling of William Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet that focuses on Tybalt (derisively referred to as "the Prince of Cats") and his Capulet crew as they do battle nightly with the hated Montagues. Set in a Blade Runner-esque version of Brooklyn, PRINCE OF CATS is a mix of urban melodrama, samurai action and classic Shakespearean theater...all written in Iambic Pentameter!

#comics recs #librarian-ing all over the place #these are a mix of comics I've read and loved and comics that are on my personal to-read list #I think I'll start with Paper Girls #go ahead and be a dumpster fire Marvel #we've got plenty to read in the meantime #feel free to reblog with your own recs #I love seeing what people are excited about reading

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radgeorgie · 7 years

Text

~~~tag game~~~

shoutout to @pastel-sk1es for thinking my blog was cool, and also tagging me in this

im tagging @samiramueller bc i wanna get to know you better!

1. What Time Is It Where You Are?

3:48 (Michigan, USA)

2. Current Energy Levels?

85%, i slept for 12+ hours last night surprisingly

3. Song That You’re Obsessed With At The Moment?

any song twice has come out with

4. Other Kpop Groups You Stan That Aren’t BTS?

tooooo many (that you can find here lmao) but I stan these religiously:

TWICE

Red Velvet

Monsta X

SEVENTEEN

ASTRO

5. Bands Outside of Kpop That You Stan?

Little Mix mainly, but I do like a few american pop songs

6. Cats or Dogs?

cats! but i did volunteer at a dog shelter not to long ago...

7. Favourite Sound?

stereotypical white girl but rain? the sound of my own snoring? lmao

8. Something That Made You Laugh In The Last Couple of Days?

thinking about how im gonna get through college? im so royally screwed?

9. Favourite Thing About Your Bias?

how he never stops trying. He keeps trying to be a better person for himself and his members and his fans.

10. Apps / Sites that you use often?

tumblr (obliviously), twitter (kimsjoonie), snapchat (cronuss-ampora)

11. Where Are You From?

born & raised in the usa

12. Are You More of An Introvert or Extrovert?

introvert

13. Since When Have You Been Into Kpop And How Did You Discover It?

2012, but I didn’t really get into it until august 2014. I was scrolling through tumblr for playlists & found snsd’s the boys (eng ver). I really fell in love with it wanted to research more, but I was young & didn’t really like listening to music that didn’t ing to music that wasn’t in english (lmao) so I kind of forgot about it? It wasn’t until Jessica left SNSD that I really wanted to get into KPop, bc I was falling out of the anime fandom lmao. I decided to nosedive into KPop and here we are now!

14. Who Was The First Kpop Group You Got Into?

Girls Generation! (with SHINee following very close after)

15. Do You Have Any Pets? If Yes, Which One(s)?

one, a dog named bo (also known as bobo, bobo pet & bobo baggins)

16. Tea or Coffee?

neither, I hate both lmao

17. Day or Night?

~~~night~~~

18. What Kind of Movies Do You Prefer Watching?

horror mostly, i don’t watch movies that music

19. What Is Your Biggest Wish For The Future?

another stereotypical white girl answer, but to be happy. im sick of wanting to die all the time

20. What’s Your Way of Being Creative

photography & music

21. What’s Your Dream Job?

idk at this point in the game. im going to college of photography so i guess that? thats what i wanted to be when i was younger too

22. Which Country / Countries Do You Desperately Want To Visit?

any, I wanna visit every country at least once

23. How many languages do you speak?

one bitch I live in the whitest country ever

24. What was your favorite subject in school/college/university?

history, although only a little, i hate that place with a burning passion

25. Do you play, or have you played, any musical instruments?

i used to play trumpet back in 7th grade, but my band teacher bullied me out of it so I dont play it anymore

26. Do you believe in horoscopes/zodiacs?

yes bitch tf

27. Is there anything you really want to learn or to do?

i really wanna learn another language, but im tired & lazy

28. How many times in your life have you moved house/city/country?

twice, once when I was 5 & again when I was 15

29. Would you rather have no children or a lot of children?

no children, fuck em

30. Are you religious/spiritual?

31. Do you drink alcohol?

im the lamest bitch ever, no

32. If you got to spend a whole week alone with your idol, what would you want to do? (apart from sex… ¬_¬)

I’d love to visit their hometown with them. meet their family, see where they grew up, meet their childhood friends & eat at the same places they love. I’d love to see them happy & healthy surrounded by friends and family.

34. If you could be the best in the world at ONE thing, what would it be?

something that would make me successful & happy

35. What Are Your Passions?

sleeping.......death........

36. What are your pet-peeves?

slow walkers, people with annoying laughs

37. Favourite Anime / Manga Movies?

i haven’t watched anime in 20 years, but ouran high school host club still has me feeling some type of way

38. Favourite Anime / Manga Tv Shows?

isnt this just a repeat of question 37?

39. What is your favourite season?

fall~~

40. If you could have whichever nationality you wanted what would it be and why?

i mean...being american kind of sucks, but i dont think id change it.

41. Would you rather visit outer space or the deep sea and why?

outer space, id love to visit the stars & see planets from an outside view

42. Greatest fear?

another white girl answer, but being lonely (lmao bitch tf @ me wtf)

43. What was the most memorable moment of your life?

starting high school. i cried for two days & wanted nothing but death.

44. Something you can’t live without?

sleep & my phone

45. If you were granted one wish, what would it be and why?

to matter to someone on a personal level

46. What would you say to your idol if you met them?

tell them that I love them & hope they remain healthy & happy for the years to come

47. Somebody you care about a lot?

my friend & namjoon lmao

48. Life lesson you learned?

it fucking sucks & the best deal to deal with it is tough it out

49. What would you say to your ten year old self?

remain happy as much as you can & fuck what everything has to say

50. What are you most thankful for?

nothing really????? im sorry?????

51. Have you ever been to a K-Pop concert?

ive been to a dumbfoundead concert, but I don’t know if you’d consider him k-pop...

52. What are your goals for next year?

in ill be in college, to make friends

53. Who are your role models and why?

prolly namjoon lmao. just his life struggles, how he went with what he wanted in life not with what he was the best at, his goals & his accomplishments I could go on but honestly nobody cares lmao

54. What motivates you to keep striving towards your goals?

the idea that ill have a good life once i achieve them

55. If you could be anyone for a day who would it be and why?

like a 95 year old that lives in a retiring home so I can sleep 4ever lmao

56. Who is your bias list wrecker?

i have too many, but in BTS its def suga

57. If you could listen to only one album for the rest of your life what would it be? Why?

quite surprisingly, but FOB’s album Save Rock & Roll, I love every song on that album & the impact it has.......holy shit dude

58. What’s your favorite food from your home country? (because I honestly love food so much)

holy shit.... honestly...america has stolen like half of its menu from other countries, but im in love with chicken pitas, and i think thats an american thing? I could be wrong tho.

ADDED QUESTION:

59: do you watch tv often? what tv shows are you obsessed with recently?

#pastel-s1kes #samiramiller #me #about me

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jelenagnoura · 8 years

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Unexpected // Alfie & Gigi

Summary: An unexpected meeting at an even more unexpected place…

Words: 14,909

@enochalready

Sometimes, Alfie lived up to his siblings’ suggestion of him being a little shit - and today was no exception. With his older brother’s birthday looming, he had set out to find a present for him, something that he hadn’t given to him or anyone else before. Needless to say that his search in the Galleries du Roi had been fruitless and that even the small boutiques in town hadn’t had anything that would catch his eye. With a suppressed sigh, he slumped down in his seat at the nearest café, nursing his coffee, while he tried to come up with an idea that would work in his favour. But nothing came to mind, not even, after he had asked the lovely female barista. With her number on his receipt he eventually set out again, even though he felt like going home and find something online might be his best option by now.

It was in a quiet side street at the edge of Centre-Ville that he found a small shop he hadn’t quite noticed before. It looked quaint and a little out of place, really, but since he had never been in there, he decided to try his luck. And lucky he got - he had to laugh to himself, as he found himself in the middle of a sex shop, with a very attractive attendant in a corset moving towards him. With an easy smile he waved her away, indicating he would browse for a while, all the while his mind was whirring with ideas for his brother’s birthday. Oh, how he would hate him, but gosh, he and his wife surely needed to spruce up their sex life. Out of the corner of his eye, he spotted someone else looking around, and paid them no further mind at first, only - it was a little weird that they were wearing an oversized hoodie, cap and sunglasses inside, wasn’t it? It took him a few minutes to realise who it was, but when he did, he stepped close and said, “If I were you, I’d choose a vibrator without rhinestones - as nice as they look, that cannot feel comfortable.”

---

Gigi had always gone out of her way to tease and annoy her siblings a little. 99% of the time it consisted of being overly motherly and protective, but after way too much TMI convo with Bella about the younger Hadid's sex life it was kind of a gimmicky idea that Gigi would go out and get her sissy a little something from a certain shop in town. The one part she had not thought through was the fact that she was by far the most uptight in their family and while Bella probably would find whatever Gigi would buy her kind of funny, the blonde herself was dying when she actually set foot into a sex shop she had previously googled with Cully on the phone laughing his ass off at Gigi's idea. The hood of her hoodie that she had pulled even over her baseball cap probably was best proof that she did not want to be seen whatsoever. Actually after Paris Fashion Week she wasn't in the mood to be seen or photographed at all, but if photographed, this was not the location she’d want it to happen.

The overly helpful sales assistant that was basically next to her side the minute she had set foot into the store scared her almost as much as the thought of being photographed, as did the voice in which the woman loudly declared that she’d be around in case Gigi had any questions. The blonde was close to running again, ditching the idea of annoying her sister a little, but now she was already there and how bad could it really be? She was 21...not 12. There couldn't be much she didn't know of, right? Well she was wrong, there was actually barely anything she had any idea or use for, nor was she sure if she wanted to know. This went beyond 50 shades and Vibrators for sure. “Next time I’ll just get her some agent provocateur stuff...!” Gigi mumbled under her breath, still super confused about most of the things around her, before she turned around rather quickly, a somewhat shocked expression on her face when she heard a voice behind her which freaked her out more than anything else. Seeing Alfie was a blessing, after all it was not a random fan, but also her face turned completely red in a matter of seconds. “I am..this is..not...thanks?”

---

The shade of her skin turned tomato red in seconds and he had to bite the inside of his cheek to keep from laughing. Not that he was a regular customer at shops like these - okay, he had bought a thing or two in the past, and even annoyed Matt with a gift once - but Gigi looked so terribly out of place he was almost bursting to ask what she was doing here of all places. Curiosity got the better of him, and he tilted his head to the side, before asking, “What is it not?” Funny, he noticed, they were almost the same height, which was not something he was used to when talking to women - and some men. It was nice not to have to look down on someone or stoop to make them feel less small. Leaning against the shelves, he crossed his arms and waited for a reply.

“So, what are you looking for exactly?” he asked eventually, his grin threatening to break through this time around. “Because I’m just trying to find some ideas or gifts to annoy my older brother with - he’s a bit stuck up, when it comes to enjoying sex. Or so it always seems.” There were things he actually didn’t want to know about his older brother and sister-in-law, but with their family being as it was, sex was always a revolving topic somehow. “And since eatable condoms are just about the lamest thing I could get him, voilà,” he waved his hands around, “here I am. Maybe you can try and help me find something and in return, I’ll do you a favour.”

---

“This is not exactly my...I mean….nothing, I am just...walking in front of the world half naked or naked probably seems less awkward than this right now!” Gigi admitted laughing and brushed the hoodie from her head, suddenly the cap and the hood feeling terribly out of place. She was rambling, rambling 100% and she did not know how to stop. This was by far the most uncomfortable she had been in god knows how long. Especially with Alfie not seeming to mind this location, or what they were surrounded by. Trying to copy his comfortable position she just felt something plastic-y against her back, making her jump slightly and causing some vibrator packages to fall onto the ground only to leave Gigi even more mortified than before. “Oh god!” This just got worse by the second it seemed.

“And here I thought I am a terrible sister. Bella. I wanna annoy her. We had a convo about how to forget exes and i don’t want my baby sister to sleep around so….here we are. This is me trying to annoy her at my best which I am really good at usually, but this is something she normally would do to me to make me feel uncomfortable, not vice versa!” The way he talked about his brother though made her grin. This could be Bella talking about her basically. “Some people enjoy sex quietly...without sharing their excitement with everyone, just saying!” The blonde told him grinning a little, the first facial expression that wasn’t totally uncomfortable but honest, which changed again at the mentioning of edible condoms. “Why would anyone want that..I mean edible condoms? It's like flavored ones guys think to buy for prom. That's just odd!” When he asked her to help she couldn't help but laugh “Did you not figure out yet that I am not exactly certain what to get people in here? I am by now convinced that I don't know what three quarter of the things in here even are..which is terrible for a 21 year old, right?”

---

“Naked, hm? What designer would want that - I can’t think of any… shoes perhaps? But then that isn’t completely naked,” he teased her with an ever broadening grin. Not only did she look out of place, she was completely out of her comfort zone, it seemed, and not even trying to cover that up. Well, maybe a little, but when the boxes fell to the floor, and she was back to giving a ripe tomato a run for its money, which amused Alfie even more. “At least you got that right,” he grinned, as he helped her pick up the vibrators and put them back on the shelf, adding, “oh god might be the reaction to many of these things… somehow.” He pulled her away from them and into the next isle, latex and leather, as far as they could determine, which he hoped made her a little less uncomfortable and jumpy. “You’re not a terrible sister - hm, maybe for trying to keep her from having fun, but hey, I guess that’s what older siblings do. Speaking from experience I can tell you that trying to keep us grasshoppers from having sex doesn’t work. Even less so, if you say it out loud.”

Ah, a smile, he thought triumphantly and smiled back. If he could make her forget where she was for a moment , maybe that could help her get something for her sister. Though, seeing how he and her sister might think alike, she would probably find something that was useful to her more than annoying. But he wouldn’t tell her that just yet. “No sound at all? How would I be able to know, if you enjoyed it, if you were quiet? That sounds awfully boring -” Suddenly, he laughed at her facial expression. “I guess gummi bears and edible condoms aren’t that far apart in spirit, one just a little dirtier than the other. Flavoured, though? Never got why that mattered.” If anyone had told him earlier today that he would end up having a conversation about sex and condoms with one of the world’s most successful models, he would have laughed in their faces, yet here he was, and honestly? He was enjoying himself. A little too much perhaps. “You know what? Let’s find out,” he proposed, offering her his arm to draw her further down the aisle. “Let’s maybe start with things you do know - underwear. By the way, there’s some edible around, too.” He pointed it out to her. “Not sure whether you should eat in bed, though - at least not that.”

---

“Chanel!” The answer came really quickly and so did memories of her French Vogue Cover. “Actually it was not a runway but a magazine. But I tried to make a point here!” She saw how he was trying to make her feel more comfortable, unsure if it worked although she couldn't help but smile. When he mentioned that she got a thing right she was confused for a moment, a laugh escaping her lips though at the awful joke he just made. “I am not sure if that is something god should be thanked for at the end of the day!” She tried to joke back but she did know well what he meant. At least one thing she knew right now. He did exactly right, leading her into an aisle she was at least somewhat more comfortable and even familiar with. Some of those pants could have come straight out of her closet, leather and lace up, latex even...maybe not the crotchless part, but therefor her pants probably were by far more expensive. Next time she was called out for her spending habits she’d simply blame it on the fact that pants that actually cover crotches seemed to be way more expensive than crotchless ones. “I don't want to keep her from having sex..not my priority at least, I just don't want her to, not sure how to say it!” She really wasn't sure what rubbed her the wrong way when it came to Bella and boys. Maybe it was just not wanting her sister to be hurt, or misjudged by the outside. Especially the press who she knew could be ruthless.

“Well, I was talking about not talking about sex, not not...I am so loosing my thoughts here, this is not my strong suit, talking I mean. Talking generally I am good at, not really, but talking about sex..I think you get my point here!” Gigi honestly laughed, she knew she seemed like the most uptight person ever right now. Maybe she was, especially for her age. It was never really a thing she was vocal about, not with people outside of her closest circle though. Sure she had giggled and talked to Bella about sex, only if it was her own sex life though, talking about bella's made her cringe every single time. she was her baby sister after all. “And thank you, nobody ever called me boring..especially not in the context of thinking of me in bed!” It was the first time she felt comfortable enough to actually tease him back right there. “Don't ruin gummy bears for me you idiot!” She scolded him softly, the point he was trying to make still making her cringe. Edible condoms simply seemed like an awful idea. “Underwear I know and like..if its pretty. Eating it though? Once again, that sounds weird. Had it painted on before which is interesting, but messy!”

---

„Chanel makes you go naked on the runway?“ Eyebrows raised he leaned in and looked at her curiously, a grin flitting over his face, when she corrected herself. „Been at photo shoots before, no one ever asked me to get naked.“ His fingers scratched his chin, while he pursed his lips. „Maybe I’m doing something wrong.“ His eyebrows lifted further. „Then why do you Americans prefer saying it? Or rather screaming it? Not like God can overhear you that way…“ Watching her eye the clothes, if they could even be called that, around them, he could see that she was less tense than she had been before, but still not entirely comfortable. For someone who was strutting around in various states of dress or undress for a living, she seemed rather unused to being around the really sexy stuff. Again, if it could be called that - he didn’t quite see the appeal of crotchless trousers. But maybe that was personal preference that he wasn’t really privy to. „You don’t want to think about your baby sister getting it,“ he finished her sentence for her teasingly. „See, that’s the thing about younger siblings, they’ll do it, whether you want it or not, only thing you can do is make sure that they do it right.“ At least that was how his siblings had done it, and while he had writhed and fought them tooth and nail - because who the fuck wanted to get the birds and bees talk from their older sister? - he had still learnt a few useful lessons that way. And most of all that his siblings had his back, no matter what.

Alfie couldn’t help but laugh at her rambling, and even more so, when she joined in. She really wasn’t good at the talking part, at least not when it came to talking about sex in a sex shop, but - it was funny to see her try. Kinda cute, too. „Never called you boring, per se… just - it’s something else to get someone to lose themselves so much they’re vocal about what they want. I like that, women knowing what they want and not being afraid to ask for it.“ It seemed to him that she had almost forgotten that they were standing in an aisles filled with latex clothes at the moment, and maybe that was truly something she could relate to, more than the little sex toys scattered around the other aisle. „I’m not!“ he defended himself, raising his hands slightly, „I’m sure you can find gummy bears here, too - maybe even some wearing latex…“ Shaking his head, he pointed to a pair of barely there lingerie. „I know these do look good, amazing even, on someone, but - what’s the point, if they don’t cover anything?“ Hearing her last words, his eyes widened and he eyed her curiously, trying not to check her out too much. „Just how does painted on underwear work? And how do you get it off again?“ Needless to say he was intrigued. „Or is it simple body paint and you get to strut around naked?“ Pensively, he looked at the clothes, then back at Gigi. „I might prefer the latter option, just personally speaking."

---

“I wasn't naked, just mostly wearing Chanel Nr. 5!” It was funny how comfortable she was with the world being able to see her on a magazine cover in nothing, how her first big gig had been the Pirelli calendar wearing nothing but a little Latex body and how generally rolling around in a bed in her underwear for work wasn't a big deal, but talking about sex? Sure a way to get Gigi flustered. It was one of the things she had hated the most about dating in the public eye. People always asking for private details like that which she never managed to give proper answers to. She’d much rather talk about how she enjoyed a man cooking for her than anything else. “Right, cause Brits are so much more creative? And don't say that they are. Nor are Australians for that matter!” Sticking her tongue out at him softly she couldn't help but notice that this was getting more and more comfortable. Maybe thanks to the lack of vibrating, buzzing or other penis shaped things around them. “Her exes tends to sing about it, that was enough for me honestly, dont need to full disclosure. Making that pussy rain was more than I was ever willing to hear out of anyone’s mouth!” Gigi rolled her eyes mentioning a certain ex of her sister who lately wasn't on the list of her favorite people, but nobody who ever hurt her siblings would be or was ever on that list. “You know I do have older sisters myself, half sisters but still. They did go above and beyond to make sure I knew what I was doing when I dated the first guy, or how to prepare for prom, or anything similar, but that's different. Bella and Anwar are...my babies. They can have sex, they can do whatever, but I wanna have them protected and in a bubble!”

“I think that comes naturally when you’re really trusting someone. When you are really intimate with someone asking for something isnt even a question, it's just something you do because you know you can. And because you want to!” This one she really meant, which was probably due to the fact that Gigi, maybe untypical for her age, had been in relatively long and serious relationships where trust had always been the number one thing and therefore being vocal about what she wanted or needed wasn't really something she ever had to worry about before. “Oh here it goes. Underwear isn't for men, its for girls. Nothing boost the ego quite like the right kind of lace, or satin, or whatever on your skin. Something that just makes you feel on top of your game. That's what those are for. If it leads to you, or any man enjoying them? Even better, but that's not priority there!” Gigi realized she had mentioned something he was interested in when she saw the look on his face. “Well lucky you cause the latter version is actually what it is. Takes hours but its people spraying and painting a bikini or whatever on you in a way that actually looks real. And water would be the magic trick to ultimately get it off!”

---

„That still means you were naked, only smelling nicely, too…“ The life of a model was slightly weird, he realised, because while she was flustered about even looking at penis-shaped toys, she was completely comfortable talking to him about getting stark naked for a magazine shoot at the same time. It was intriguing, she was intriguing, this mix of confident and out of her element, smiling and still blushing at the mere mention of things… it made him want to push the envelope a little further, see where it landed him. Alfie nodded appreciatively at her almost perfect counter comment. „So you have experience with Australians, hm? I wonder, if they’re that different from us Englishmen.“ Actually, he had no idea, whether there was much difference, but one thing he had noticed was that „oh my God“ was certainly a very American thing to say. Arching his eyebrow, he blinked at her. „Excuse me, what? He sings about her? Taylor Swift style, you mean?“ And then he burst out laughing at her description, just imagining it in his mind made him throw his head back and laugh even harder. „Is he sure he didn’t want it to rain pussies instead?“ It was indeed slightly weird, and had to be even more awkward, when you knew the person that singer was crooning about personally. „So, what’s the most useful thing they taught you?“ Leaning back against a shelf, he crossed his arms and thought about his own question for a moment. „I think mine was actually how to go down on a woman properly…“ And man, that had been one very interesting talk back then. He could still feel his ears and cheeks being on fire, as his sister and her friends went on and on about it, and how they threw out his older brother for being a hopeless case already

„True, trust is the key, but even in a one night kind of thing you should never be afraid to speak up, especially when it comes to wanting to feel good. Nothing worse than someone just taking one for the team. That’s not enjoying yourself, that’s just highly uncomfortable.“ There was a big difference between just knowing each other for a day or even a few hours, and knowing each other inside out. He had experienced both, been hurt during the latter much more, which was why he preferred the former at the moment. „Not that I don’t enjoy the view, I do. But do you really wear this -“ he held up a pair of flimsy crotchless panties up for her to see, „under your regular clothes? Doesn’t that chafe horribly?“ Alfie grinned at her, dropping them in her hands. „Your sister might enjoy those… though I always thought ferocious high heels made the girls go from good to badass in 0.5 seconds.“ His eyes grew slightly wider at her further explanation and he was about to ask for proof, when he stopped himself. “How on earth did someone get that job and survived?” he asked instead and shook his head amusedly, before he stepped behind her, put his hands on her shoulder and gently steered her to another aisle. „Okay, come on, enough about clothes - honestly, if you want to get back at your sister, we need to find you something proper to play with." Realising his mistake, he grinned, “her, I mean.”

---

“Dated an Aussie for almost four years, I am technically almost an honorary Australian you could say! In my case I at least knew from the beginning what the Australian was saying. British accents can be so hard to understand. It's that moment of just nodding and appreciating beauty honestly!” When the actor asked her if it was Taylor kind of singing it was Gigi's turn to burst out into laughter. “If Taylor would sing about drugs, bitches and pussy then yes, it would be Taylor style, but since she doesn't...you know The Weeknd? Guy that used to have the pineapple hair?” The blonde knew the answer was most likely yes, it was hard to not know Abel these days. “His songs are or at least were sung to my sister a couple of times and I am still mortified about it!” Realizing that she wasn't one to talk about singers writing songs about girls though she quickly shut up again, only grinning ever so slightly. When he asked about the most important things her older sisters had taught her she bit her lip in contemplation, not sure what the answer was right away. “Probably that college boys were the right kind of deal if I want to learn something!” She told him laughing before she shook her head “No, that's not really what they taught me, that's just how I took from it. I think it's very similar to yours...blow jobs were high on the list of things they told me about. Or more like things I listened to them talk about with each other and being horrified by the idea!” Raising her eyebrows she couldn't help but wonder though “How exactly would your sisters explain to you though how to go down on a girl? That seems...kinda hard to explain. And massively awkward!”

“You are probably right about that!” It was a simple answer, short and sufficient and easier than explaining how the last year was the first time in her life she ever spent single and therefore wasn't exactly a master of one time only things. Looking at the panties her reflexes were quick to catch them when he dropped them in her hands. “Not really, but only because I just don't get the crotchless part. Only reason to possibly flash people is because I wanna avoid panty lines under tight clothes to be honest...the lace though? Yes, sure!” When he mentioned heels Gigi nodded “Heels too, but that's not always practical. I do like sneakers on most days, heels are a nice touch and ego booster every now and then though!” The fact that she stood in the middle of a sex shop telling Alfie about clothes just showed a lot about her love for her job and also that she’d do anything to forget that she actually wasn't shopping for clothes. When his hands guided her to move somewhere different in the store she groaned “Oh come on I think I already don't like this idea anymore...lets get your brother something and I’ll ignore that you just proposed that I should get something for myself!”

---

„Is that meant to be an honour or an insult?“ Alfie teased with a wink, when she mentioned being a honorary Australian. „Their accent is just as bad as ours - and love, you understand me, so where’s the problem? Though you can always nod and appreciate my beauty.“ Just to make her laugh he finished with a flourish and curtsied. Ah, yes, he had forgotten that they were actually friends, her and Taylor - and for a moment he thought he had actually overstepped a boundary, but her reply was so on point, that he had to laugh again, something he found himself doing more and more in her proximity, he realised. „That would make for a scandal. Or a very interesting Swift album…“ Of course he had heard about The Weeknd, who had not? But he hadn’t known that he had dated Gigi’s sister - and suddenly, some of her comments made a lot more sense. Alfie nodded pensively. „Singers have weird ways to express their feelings about something or someone,“ he mused, then shrugged, „and when you split - ooooh, that must be mighty awkward, mustn’t it?“ It was then that he realised two things, one that she had stopped talking, and two that she probably had personal experience when it came to singers singing about their women. „Be glad it wasn’t Jason Derulo, though, he would have used his name at least three times in that song to boost his ego.“ How their talk had gone from rather innocent topics to sex again he didn’t quite remember, probably his fault, but he was too amused to steer the conversation away from it. „And how exactly have they taught you about blowjobs?“ he teased her right back, leaning in with a curious look on his face. „Honestly, it was a lot of „go there, do this, for the live of you do not ever do that“, that type of thing. And then - trial and error.“

Alfie didn’t push the matter, it was clear that she didn’t want to talk about it further, and that was fine by him. „Then we’re two who don’t get it - I mean, what’s the point. If I want to fuck someone, what the underwear looks like is the last thing I’m concerned about.“ Her admission about flashing people had him whip his head around to look at her. „Ever done that to someone on purpose?“ he asked, before he could stop and think about it. He eyed her carefully. Not that flustered about talking about that, not anymore at least. „Women in sneakers are my kind of person.“ For the first time that day, he let his eyes drop to her feet and then slowly back up her body. The hoodie still made him laugh, although he did so silently. „Oh, come on, Ms Hadid - you can’t leave empty handed. Or at least without an idea of what to find around here.“ Grinning at the shop assistant, he moved them into a corner at the back of the shop, where the small sex toys were on display. „Let’s start with - is it for her or for her to use on a guy?“ Alfie graciously ignored her calling him out, though he did grin at her broadly. „Because that makes all the difference."

---

“It depends on where in England. Some of those accents are just insane to understand!” She remembered how her entire family had struggled to understand Zayn the first couple of times they spent times together and really, even after dating him for a while there were always moments of having to think twice before realizing what he wanted from her. “You know, some guys sing about general stuff, others sing about having sex with you in a bathroom stall...or you riding their surfboard. Or Pillow Talk. It all comes down to preference I guess!” It was ridiculous, the twist and turns their talk constantly took but she didn't really mind it all that much. It was nice, easy going and fun after all and nothing she told him was something he couldn't figure out or read on the internet. “Mostly just that it's not as much blowing as the name would suggest!” Gigi answered laughing, her hands covering her eyes for a moment before she peeked up at him again. “Did it actually help? Your sisters telling you what to do and how to do it?” It sounded like the kind of thing that was way too individual and different for every single person to actually be taught to a boy by his sisters.

“I mean I am thankful it's no longer the 00s and people like Paris Hilton flash people for a living, but..no I don't think I ever really flashed someone on purpose. Just really on accident either at work or like..at after parties with short dresses or those kind of overly high slits in a gown!” Actually she wasn't sure how much it had happened, thankfully never on camera but some dresses did require minimal or no underwear and Gigi would never not listen to her stylists in moments like that. “You need a girl who can rock both, leggings and sneakers and an evening gown!” Gigi told him grinning, knowing that she did describe half of the fashion world including herself and all of her friends but she meant it. In her opinion just one side wouldn't be half as much fun. He wasn't really subtle when he checked what she was wearing shoe wise though and that fact alone made her laugh out loud. Her laugh got choked up in her throat when he said that she couldn't leave without buying something and for a moment she was going to ask him if he thought she was in the store with an oversized hoodie and a base cap for no reason. Carrying out a bag wasn't exactly the ideal plan right now. “I think I already have enough ideas what people buy in here and all of it scarred me for life!” She mumbled, not wanting to move one bit towards the miniature sex toys, nor did she want to hear the shop assistant eagerly explaining anything to them. When Alfie even asked a question Gigi looked at him in horror, her eyes widening. “Pshh!” She tried to shush him. The shop assistant happily went on about how that miniature thing in front of them was supposed to stimulate her while he’d have a remote deciding on how fast it would work...all which caused Gigi to simply die in embarrassment , even more so when the woman grinned at them and concluded “And it's perfect cause it truly fits in any handbag and you two can use it whenever you feel like you need some excitement in your life!” Gigi would have argued that they weren't a couple, that her life was plenty exciting and that the last thing she wanted was something that someone else could control inside of her...but she was left speechless and back to her earlier stage of being purely uncomfortable with a face even more red than it had been before.

---

There was no way he could argue against that. There were some horrible accents and dialects around in England and Great Britain, some even he had trouble understanding at first. Growing up in London, he had mostly heard the typical Southerner accent, which was something he was used to. „Surfboard, hm? That must be a painful deformity... pillow talk, at least, I get,“ he smiled down at her, „that is, if anyone’s still able to talk.“ Her comment made him laugh, and through back at her, „Suck job just doesn’t have the same ring to it, don’t you think?“ For a moment he wondered whether he should bring up the question of why it was called a blow job, when there was nothing to actually blow on. Unless... but that sounded rather painful and he made a face. „Apart from me wanting to have the earth open up and swallow me whole for the most of that „talk“, I think so. It wasn’t all graphic, but there were a few helpful tips, I think. Everyone is different, likes it differently, or does it differently - the trick is to find out what they like and go for it, push them over the edge. If you can make them see stars, you’re good.“ It had only been later that he had realised that magazines like Cosmo and others would go into way more detail about what had to go where when and how. Still, he was thankful his sisters had taken him aside to tell him that being selfish in bed was a sure fire way to fuck up. Again, Alfie made a face, this time at the mention of Paris Hilton. Poor woman was a walking reality tv joke, and he wondered why on earth people had given her and others so much leeway to expose themselves. Literally and figuratively. „Aren’t there ways to prevent that from happening? You work in the business, you should know.“ He couldn’t quite imagine just flashing someone by accident, even less so at work, but then again, getting ready backstage at a fashion show had to be very different from being backstage on a tv or film set. „At the same time?“ Alfie arched an eyebrow and grinned at Gigi. „Might make for a whole new trend.“

Funny, how Gigi could go from comfortably telling him about flashing people by accident to being mortified at the mere thought of checking out a few toys people could and would use on themselves or others. „I don’t think you’ve even seen half of the badass stuff they have in here, yet. Crotchless panties and vibrators really don’t count, darling.“ Her desperate tries to remain invisible to the shop assistant made him laugh, although he gathered that doing so out loud might make her run, after all. And he was having too much fun to let her leave just yet. While the other woman spoke, Alfie kept his eyes firmly on Gigi, watching in amusement as her cheeks grew redder the longer the explanation went on. „Here, take it,“ he was told and the little toy was dropped into his hands, and started vibrating softly in his palm. „Nice feeling, isn’t it? You can turn it up a notch and increase the stimulation, for both of you. It’s quite the big seller right now.“ Looking at the little device, he didn’t quite know whether he should ask, how that would ever stimulate him, or any guy, but then decided to investigate a little more and - „Some couples prefer to use it on each other, which is why we have many different colours.“ While the shop assistant turned her back to them, he cautiously hovered the toy above the back collar of Gigi’s hoodie, and set it against her skin, when it was turned on again via the controller. „Sorry, love, slipped my fingers,“ he grinned at her, and handed it back to the clerk. „Not striking your fancy, it seems, hm? Well, maybe something more extravagant might be our thing? We have vibrating anal and vaginal beads which can each set at a different pace. Or what about a couple vibrator? Or a vibrating cock ring? Let me tell you, that is an experience you’ll never forget.“ „The latter, definitely,“ Alfie grinned, and made sure Gigi couldn’t run, linking their arms together. Now that was going to be a gift for his brother.

---

His comment about the Surfboard made her laugh loudly, it was a terrible euphemism that she until that day still sort of cringed at, but she was young and in love so back then it kind of seemed like an okay thing for her boyfriend to sing about. “Pillow talk is logical isn't it? Not sure if it means talking at moment when you might not be able to though!” She mused softly, honestly not ever having thought about this, not even for a split second. “There is a way to prevent it, its called wearing panties, but there are clothes that make not exposing something hard and once you’ve been backstage at a Fashion Show you just start to not really care anymore. I have a great stylist and a great time, so whenever I wear something that could eventually expose anything they are by my side and warning me!” It seemed like such a random conversation to have with a Alfie, but it was true, there wasn't really a reason to be weird about it. At least not to her which might have been weird considering she couldn't even look at most of the little toys and gadgets around them without feeling like she needed to close her eyes or look away again. “Wearing sneakers with an evening gown isn't too weird, actually I just take the heels off if they get too uncomfortable to be honest!” She never would understand the fuss about wearing heels for hours and just going through that pain when there were sneaker around somewhere. She had been the one going to a Met Gala afterparty in a see through mini dress and sneaker which was probably the best way to actually describe Gigi in a nutshell. “You know, I’ve been told I’ve set a couple of trends lately, not sure if that's true or not though!”

---

Gigi had basically stopped listening at the point when the shop assistant seemed all too eager to explain them how the fuck they were supposed to use that little thing in Alfie’s hand, which only made her shriek when she suddenly felt something vibrate against the collar of her hoodie. “You asshole!” She mumbled laughing, the laugh honest as ever, after all he got her real good in that moment. “Well this is an experience I seriously wanna forget!” Gigi mumbled when the shop assistant was telling them about more extravagant options and even more so when Alfie confirmed that the last option was one he’d be interested in. When she saw the cock ring presented to them her nose scrunched up, her eyes showing the obvious confusing. Now how the fuck was that going to be something anyone would enjoy? It was a bit beyond her and the concept seemed massively strange. Not that she actually wanted imagine it. No. “The time people spend in here figuring out how to please each other could be used just doing it!” She finally hissed at Alfie, not realizing how her words must have sounded. “I mean..not that I am, I wasn't suggesting. I just feel like all of this sounds like a really tricky….and I am back to not being able to talk again…!”

---

„Pillow talk can be, well, quite insightful - there’s hardly a moment where someone is more vulnerable than at that time, wouldn’t you say?“ He wasn’t the hit it and quit it kind of guy, nor did he throw anyone out of his bed, be it someone he had just met or known longer. And true, those conversations could be very interesting - after all, baring your soul wasn’t that hard after having bared anything else. Poetic, really, if he thought about it. „Wow, that’s a whole new concept. I thought going commando was the norm,“ Alfie teased her, and shook his head. Her life was so vastly different from his, and while he was used to having a stylist around on set, he surely could dress himself most of the time, thank you very much. „Maybe such clothes should come with inbuilt underwear, so flashing doesn’t even happen. Maybe I should patent that.“ Again, he burst out in laughter, it seemed that their conversation, as weird as it was, continued to amuse both of them and that surely wasn’t a bad thing. „Oh, Miss Trendsetter, that might have flown right past me,“ he sighed dramatically and put his hand on his chest, eventually even rolled his eyes at himself in amusement. „How will I ever be able to figure out a Hadid original now? Tell me - how?“

Alfie threw her a mockingly apologetic smile and shook his head. „That’d be weird to forget seeing how it feels the same as the relaxation methods they use after strenuous physical activity -" His smile widened. „In sports. See, I was a rower in college and after competitions, that’s the same vibrations they would use to loosen us up.“ His grin had reached shit-eating variety by now. „Just not internally - though that might have helped a few of us be lose that stick up their arses for once.“ Still musing about that, he almost bumped into their shop assistant, who presented him with a ring-shaped object with a tiny hump on top. „Should be your size,“ she declared, but he shook his head. „See, I’m actually looking for something for my brother, so a size smaller might be more fitting - and make it a loud colour, so he doesn’t accidentally lose it.“ Or forget about it, really, which was what he was going for. “People just want different options, I guess. For when fingers or other appendages aren’t quite enough.” He arched an eyebrow. “Don’t you like to be satisfied to the core? Where someone puts a lot of effort into making you feel good, and mostly good about yourself? Otherwise sex is just mechanical - and where’s the fun in that?” He leaned in, just this side of her personal space and looked at her with a twinkle in his eyes, resting his hands on the shelves on either side of her head, essentially trapping her in. “It’s actually really easy once you’ve understood the basics.” He left it open what he actually meant, but he knew that it would draw a reaction from her.

---

“They use…?” Gigi's brows furrowed for a moment before she realized what he tried to say, a grin spreading on her lips. “You were in a rowing team in college?” Her ears perked up right now, for once because she was thankful that there was a subject popping up that wasn't fueled with sex and even more so because athletics really were the kind of subject that always interested her more than anything. “That's the kind of vibrations they used on you guys? That's a little weird, what happened to just stretching it out or a massage simple as that?” Gigi asked laughing and even though she was probably hanging out in some of the finest gyms out there, she’d never heard about using vibrations to ease the muscles after a hard workout. The fact that he might have been messing with her crossed her mind for a moment, but she pushed that thought away again. “I thought people in college were all wild and experimental. I mean I dropped out of college after a semester to focus on modelling fully, but it seemed like everybody was going crazy there really!” Not that she could really judge it correctly, she had barely been in class or lectures, only actually there when it came to turning in papers or having to participating in a test really. Otherwise work already had been too crazy to be a full time student. “You think I have a stick up my ass too? I mean you should realize by now that I am not too familiar with any of those things...right? So, you think I’ve got a stick up my ass as well?”

Staring at the ring she was honestly lost. His size? The fact that the store clerk just said something about some kind of size on toys to fit around his penis made her mind spin a little. She was totally confused. One hundred percent confused. How would the woman even guess something? “Really? You think that low of your brother?” Gigi asked grinning a little, not sure what else to say but to roll her eyes, pushing any thoughts of what to do with this little ring aside. “It just all seems so...plastic-y and fake. How could that compare to the real deal. To skin on skin and all that?” The blonde asked when he tried to tell her how it was about different options. “I feel like gadgets make it way more mechanical than anything else!” She declared sternly, and she was really set on the subject. She just couldn't imagine some vibrating piece of plastic would make her feel as good, let alone better than a man. She was a bit confused when his arms trapped her against a shelf, their eyes locking as she listened to him, his words making her once again blush softly, her lips parting to say something but instead shut up again. “You sound like you think I need to learn a thing or two. Are you offering to teach me, is that what this is about?”

---

Alfie could all but see Gigi’s mind trying to wrap around what he had just told her, and it was hard not to laugh at her confused face. „I was, yes - for three years, my whole time at Oxford, actually. We did some of the punting competitions, too, just for fun, but rowing was the main focus, when it came to sports.“ He actually missed the early morning rowing sessions, the way you trudged outside half-asleep until you were on the water, and suddenly felt wide awake and alive, no matter how much or little sleep you’ve had the night before. „You have to imagine vibrations like passive movements, which means that, given a certain frequency, your muscles loosen up and relax instead of tightening up further. It’s better than stretching, and less damaging to the muscles, because with warm-downs, you can overdo it to stop feeling sore. In the end, you cannot move for a few days, because your muscles locked up.“ His eyes found hers. „Though, let’s be realistic here, these devices are used in a whole other way.“ Her comment finally made him laugh and he nodded. „We were all that and more, but sports have a great tradition in English colleges, so that’s taken seriously - or as seriously as can be, when there was a party the night before.“ Gigi had misunderstood him, he realised and laid a hand on her shoulder gently. „No, love, I meant those types who were all about the competition, and would throw a tantrum, if it didn’t go their way. Best to find a balance between both worlds - it’s not easy sometimes, but what’s college without being a little wild and experimental at least?“ It had nothing to do with her experience or lack thereof, when it came to sex toys. „What kind of wild do you think we were?“ he chuckled.

„I actually don’t, but I love to annoy him - and since I’m his little brother I get to do so with glee.“ Plus they really had different sizes, but that’s not something he would have to tell Gigi. Sure, the real deal, slick, hot, sticky sex was great, but some people just needed the added stimulus to get themselves or each other to the brink of insanity and beyond. And if their sex life was enriched by little devices, costumes or whips and such, then all the power to them. Not everything was his kind of deal, either, but some things could be interesting to try out on someone - especially, when they had never had the pleasure before. With the shop assistant still looking for his gift for his brother, they remained alone in the aisle and somewhat hidden from people coming in the door, too. „They’re not meant to replace sex - at least not when you’re with someone else, it’s simply about taking your satisfaction to another level. You should try them first, before you brush them off so easily. Who knows, maybe you’ll acquire a taste for it?“ Alfie hadn’t even realised that he had her with her back against the shelves until she looked up at him - or rather just looked at him. She was really only a few centimetres smaller than he was. The words coming out of her mouth surprised him, but he managed a small smile and nonchalant shrug in reply. “I think you shouldn’t be so easily prejudiced against something you’ve never tried out. I’m never against broadening someone’s horizons -” Leaning in a little more, he found her eyes again, suddenly serious. It hadn’t crossed his mind before, but - “But it should be clear that it’s something you want to learn - I’m not going to Jamie Dornan you into fake BDSM stuff or foreplay with sex toys, that’s simply not on.” Didn’t even matter what he thought about it, he was giving her an out, since he had pushed her as far in the first place.

---

When he mentioned people throwing tantrums when things didn't go their way and being all about the competition Gigi grinned. It was almost as if he described her during high school. Captain of the Volleyball team and very competitive, always wanting to succeed in whatever she did. It was like her trainer had often said, she stood in her own way trying too hard to be perfect. Not that she was about to tell Alfie all that, at least not right now. “I feel bad for your brother, I at least realized that giving Bella something from here will probably backfire..and I’d be mortified knowing that she’ll actually use it, but you seem to really embrace this idea of your brother. Which is slightly weird and I feel like on a psychological level there is something deeply scarred and weird behind this obsession!” Gigi teased him laughing, the banter seriously easy right now. Maybe she had come across the wrong way though, she by no means judge the useage of little helpers and devices that could spice up sex, she simply had not yet felt the need for anything like that, nor had time ever been right perhaps. “I am not brushing them off by any means, I just think that...I think there is so much power to making someone else feel pleasure with your own body that is doesn't seem..all that needed. Maybe I am wrong and shall I ever find out I might regret saying that though!”

Alfie leant in even closer, the space between them not exactly large at this point and strangely enough she didn't mind all that much. “There we go, you do think you could broaden my horizon!” The blonde replied grinning, the fact that he said it out loud making her smirk a little. He wasn't all that wrong though perhaps. It wasn't like she ever had really experimented before. Usually she was the kind of girl to be in a relationship after 10 minutes and get hardcore commited to said relationship to a point where it almost seems clingy at times. “Are you mocking Jamie Dornan right now? Because that 50 Shades ice cube thing looked extremely hot!” She replied teasingly, admittedly she had seen the movies, read the books even at an age that for sure had not been appropriate and while they were terrible the idea of not being treated like a princess or like she was made out of sugar had been intriguing of some sort. “If you wouldn't do that though...what is it you’d do to me? Or wanna do?” Gigi had no idea where the sudden courage came from, maybe the fact that she didn't feel uncomfortable at all with him so close. Maybe the fact that she had spent the last months doing what people told her was right, working and burying everything else so deep down that she didn't even have to think about anything but work or maybe it was the fact that after almost a year of being single she had not for even a minute really embraced being single...maybe this was the time to do it?

----

„Ah, you do know what I’m talking about,“ he sing-songed, his grin matching her own. Whether she knew someone who was solely focused on competition or whether it was herself who got into it too massively to be able to take an objective step back, he didn’t know, but it didn’t matter much, either. Those types he was talking about had been the ones who had only had the competition in mind, who had pushed themselves - and others - to do better to the point of obsession. From what he had learnt about her so far, he couldn’t quite see her being that hard on others. Herself, maybe, but that was for everyone to decide for themselves. „It’s not a bad idea, you just say that to convince yourself it is. She’ll have sex with or without you giving her anything to play with, so honestly, what do you have to lose? Apart from a few mental images you might not want to have?“ Waggling his eyebrows at her amusedly, he added, „Don’t feel bad for him. My brother can be a massive dick, when he wants to - he sent me a bib and a feeding bottle for my last birthday, so I’m just taking a little revenge here.“ His lips pursed, he listened to her, his gaze never wavering from hers. Gigi had a point, of course there was no need for added help, but sometimes... it could be fun teasing one another just beyond the usual moves. For some it worked, for others it didn’t, but mainly it was something that had to be talked about beforehand and agreed upon. There was no use, if you surprised the other and made them run in the end. „This kinda makes me intrigued to find out just how powerful you are,“ he said eventually, an amused glint in his eye.

„If your name is „someone“, sure,“ he teased her back. „You’re really smug right now, you know that?“ His lower lip caught between his teeth, and he couldn’t help but think about the situation for a moment. What were they doing right now? Sure, teasing Gigi to see her blush and fluster was one thing, but was he actually considering this? “You can bet I am,” he began, but then arched his eyebrows and grinned at her. „Someone sure has seen the films, it seems.“ There was nothing that had turned him off a film more than reading the summary of 50 Shades of Grey. Some of his mates went to see the film with their girlfriends and just from the looks on their faces, he had known that it was as bad, if not worse, as expected. „That film gives bondage and sex toys a bad reputation, let’s face it. Plus, what woman would really want to have a guy walk all over her like that and still return?“ Tilting his head to the side, he gave her a small, suggestive smile. „Who’s to say I wouldn’t? If ice cubes is something you’d be comfortable with... that’s definitely a start.“ Her questions would have surprised him more a few minutes ago, but by now - he still wasn’t sure what had made him corner her like that, but the result was unexpected and somehow quite enticing. If she wouldn’t back down now, neither would he. „There’s a lot I could do to you, if you let me, with or without the help of this." Alfie waved a hand around. The shop had everything they could dream of and more, so the choice was there’s actually. „I’d like to prove to you, that using toys doesn’t mean that anything’s broken or wrong with the way you’re intimate, it’s just an alternative you can enjoy. So we’d have to test your theory over body versus toys, love... but we were talking toys, so...“ Out of a whim, he took her hand and drew her back to the small toys they had been standing in front of before. „One of those small eggs, perhaps? You could use it yourself, even. No outside control - you didn’t seem to like that, did you?“ Moving along the shelves, he looked at the displayed objects, but most seemed a little out there to try out for a first-timer. Especially a timid one like her. „Don’t think I have to ask you whether you have silk scarves around at home, I’m sure you do - blindfolding someone, that’s already one sense gone, and it’s heightening every other...“ He forewent the bondage stuff, however, because while he liked it rough as much as the next person, he wasn’t into using pain to add to pleasure - and somehow he didn’t see Gigi suddenly loving to be subjected to pain, either.

---

“Captain of the Volleyball team. My trainer always took me off the field when I was getting too upset with my own play or too hard on myself. Good life lesson, drove me completely insane back then. I am boxing now which is the same kind of thing, something I can just try to get better at every time and push myself!” It was what had caused her so much trouble in her work too lately, the constant need and want to be perfect, to be the best and to do all of it with the biggest smile on her face. It had not been easy and god knew she had not exactly succeeded in it lately. If there was one thing she knew it was that Bella would do her thing, whatever that included no matter what Gigi tried or would say, but that didn't mean she’d push the matter of her sister having sex at all. While she had planned to do it as some ‘here have that and stay away from dangerous men’ she could sense that this idea would completely backfire eventually. “The mental images are terrible though, I think it's a really bad idea. Your brother though, he sounds very mean now and I don't feel bad for him anymore, not even in the slightest!” The blonde model couldn't help but laugh when she was told that she seemed smug right now. “I am smug and you just told me you’d be intrigued to know how powerful I am...who is smug now?”

“Only the first to be honest, haven't had the time or nerve to watch the second one though!” In the midst of Fashion Month her last thought had been to go and see the second part of the 50 shades trilogy. “Well she is stupid, I don't appreciate her at all, but I do think his character has an appeal, minus the I don't wanna be touched thing, that's just weird and I still don't get that. Like...he wants sex but he doesn't wanna be touched? And I swear if my boyfriend would give me my own room in his house I’d throw a temper tantrum! Okay forget what I said, his character doesn't have an appeal at all, he is even worse than her thinking about it!” The blonde couldn't help but laugh at herself, shaking her head softly. Her laughter died a little when he mentioned that he’d be down for the ice cubes if she’d wanted to and suddenly she didn't know what made her even say it out loud. It kind of just slipped out there. “See...you are the smug one!” She simply told him when he told her that there’d be lots of things he’d do to her if she’d agree. “Not at all a fan of outside control, glad you understood that so quickly, but..you know sometimes you just need to give that up, I hate that though and I am not saying I will give it up!” She was rambling, maybe because she was still not sure what to say about this weird little vibrating thing in front of them. It still crept her out slightly. “We keep talking about me not really having done any of this yet, leaves the question if you have really...because so far you were really quiet on that subject!” She suddenly realized, crooking her head a little while she looked up at him. When he mentioned the silk scarves the model choked on her own laughter, there was no way in hell that she’d use any of her own silk scarfs for anything involving the bedroom. They were too precious for anything to happen to them. “A gentleman offers his tie, not my scarfs!” While she wasn't necessarily into BDSM, the entire blindfolding situation wasn't making her half as uncomfortable as most of the things they had previously been talking about today.

---

That explained a lot, actually - but many of them were highly ambitious and had been from a young age. And Alfie hadn’t been an exception. He had always known what he wanted and how he wanted it, and while he had listened to his parents, he had always tried to make the best of it and do things his way, too. Alfie rolled his eyes at her good-naturedly and nudged her shoulder. „You know, you should get her edible underwear, that’s probably the least „bad“ thing they have here, and if she’s hungry, she can eat it herself. Best of both worlds. Fed and happy.“ His brother wasn’t that much of a dick, but they teased each other quite a lot, and their banter was driven to new heights every year. It was nice to know, though, that she was on his side on this. „Still you,“ he chuckled, „mostly, because you just had to repeat it. You’re kinda proud of yourself right now, aren’t you?“ Fifty shades of Grey was just about the worst film, book or anything else in the history of ever, at least in his eyes. He could see the appeal in wanting to dominate someone, or letting someone dominate you, but the way it was apparently depicted in the film was mostly emotional and psychological abusive and he wasn’t here for any of that. If a woman wanted to be with him, it should be, because she wanted to, not because she was made to think that she should. There was no way around it, he couldn’t help but laugh at her conclusion and nodded. „Not that hot anymore, is he? It’s okay, you know what you want, that’d make a guy like him run for the hills.“

Alfie stepped back and gave her a little space to breathe, feeling like he had come a little too close. Her reply, though, had him tilt his head again and, while he put his hands in his pockets, he leaned in again and remarked, „Maybe a little, but you’re far too intriguing not to think about the possibilities.“ Again, he chuckled. „Duly noted, and you don’t have to give up anything you don’t want to, just let me give you a new experience you might end up enjoying.“ Funny, how he wasn’t even treating it as a possibility anymore, and he liked that she considered it as much as he did, even though she wasn’t particularly convinced of the sex toys in this shop. Or in general. Maybe she would never be, but at least she couldn’t say that she didn’t try it. „You never asked,“ he told her with a small shrug, and smiled. „And now you might have to specify - used on someone else? Or on myself?“ By now he was back to teasing her, but her asking him about it told him that she was less weirded out by all of this than she had been earlier, even seemingly having fun - at least that was what he took from her laughter at his suggestion. “Fine, my ties it is. Anything else you might want to try? I’m not into flogging, so no riding crops, love.” It was his time to laugh about their conversation, which by now had more of a preparatory shopping list vibe than simple flirting. The shop assistant came back with a box in her hands. “Have you found anything else you might want?” she asked, and Alfie turned to look at Gigi. “Last possibility to opt out of this,” he told her in a low voice, realising only now that he was still holding her hand. He squeezed it gently. “You’re always allowed to say no. I won’t do anything you’re not completely up for.”

---

“Knowing what you want can make guys run easily anyways. Especially with a family like mine who can basically make you their new son in law within 3 minutes. Then my whole work family will get into the picture and by that time you need extremely strong nerves. Or lots of weed, that one helped the ex a lot!” Gigi couldn't help but laugh at herself with that explanation, but it was true. Her family consisted out of a hundred people or so it felt and that just managed to scare people like crazy. “And with you I meant men, not you in particular!” The model cleared up, just so it was said and he didn't think that she was already talking about him in any other way than this whole casual ‘oops bumped into you in a sex shop and now we are flirting’ kind of way. Gigi didn't know when they went to actually stop talking about possibility and sort of went to legit talk about the whole deal here. “Uhm...both?” Gigi asked a little irritated for a moment when she had asked him about having used sex toys. She had not even thought of the two possibilities. That he could have used it on others or on himself. “You know, for talking such a big game of making me feel new highs you’re not really giving out much details here!” She was so confused to be honest. She had never really been a hookup kind of person at all, but this felt like something that was a possibility right now.

“You’re not arguing with me on the ties?” She asked grinning softly for a moment, honestly she was way too used to Fashion People and most men she knew were, so really, it was slightly surprising for her that he’d not worry about his ties getting messed up or what not. “What a shame..:!” She pouted at him before breaking out into laughter when he mentioned that he was not into flogging. “I’ve been riding horses for all my life, I’d hate to look at a riding crop from now on and see it in a different light!” She admitted laughing still before the shop assistant came back with a wrapped box for Alfie, well for Alfie's brother really. To say that Gigi was sure about all of this would be an exaggeration, she was still not sure about any of the products around so to find words wasn't really easy. Alfie was super adorable though, reassuring her and all of that...so why would she feel the need so say no? She was 21, single, he was single, there was no reason not just explore a little fun thing here, right? “I am not saying no...im just saying you choose or I’ll pee my pants probably!”

---

“I think it really depends on how you voice your opinions and desires, and how the other person reacts to it all,” he remarked, chuckling at her comment about her family taking him - or anyone, apparently - in within minutes. It sounded very much like his own family, who were always ready to make his friends feel right at home, and accept whomever he brought home as a date. “Your whole work family will get involved? Should I be worried?” An amused grin played on his lips and he shook his head. “No mind-addling substances needed, I’d just pretend not to know what they’re talking about. I’m good at that.” With a shrug, he moved on from their topic, although it didn’t feel as weird as it should have, probably. Alfie couldn’t help the boyish grin spreading over his face, when he realised that she wasn’t all amused with his rather general reply. “I thought you liked a man of mystery - or one that didn’t like to be touched, though I think you got over that by now,” he told her casually, then pursed his lips and actually thought about what she was asking about. College had been an interesting time to experiment and he had done so with glee and lots of enthusiasm to learn new things, about others as well as himself. “Sex toys of all kinds can be interesting with the right person, and vibrations are quite nice, when they’re placed rightly. Handcuffs or ties are fun to play around with, being at the mercy of someone is really hot.” He winked at her. “Still wondering I’m intrigued how powerful you and your body really are?” Going back to thinking about his run-ins with sex toys, he concluded, “I’m not much into getting rimmed, or anal in general, it just doesn’t do anything for me. Neither does hardcore pain, though I don’t mind the odd bite. I’d never ask you to hit me, though, even less now that I know you box.” Again, he laughed, and nudged her shoulder gently to show her he didn’t mean it as meanly as it had come out.

The shop assistant withdrew with his present and set it down on the counter. He paid her no attention, his focus on Gigi solely. “No, why should I?” Eyebrow quirked, he looked at her curiously. Ties weren’t his favourite to wear and he was happy when he didn’t have to, in his private life as much as in public, during awards shows or other events. It seemed a little out there for her, though, and he was quietly wondering why. “See? I spared you the mental images already,” he exclaimed, and bowed a little. “You ride, though? That’s a great sport. So riding, volleyball, boxing, what else is there you excel at, Miss Hadid?” It didn’t come unexpected that she wanted him to choose the toys, but since he still didn’t quite know what she preferred, he might have to get a selection and just let her try out what she felt comfortable enough with. “What else would you like to try?” he asked, walking into her personal space once more. He liked the way she reacted to him, and their topic of choice at the moment, although he was careful not to crowd her in too much. “What’s your favourite flavour?” he suddenly asked, when he realised that they would need lube, and that most likely this shop had whatever they might wish for.

---

“Placed rightly?” Now the question really was what vibrating objects to place where, especially on a man to be fair. This was the kind of talks Gigi would be having with Bella usually, or any of her sisters or half sisters, not with a man, especially since she flushed the moment she caught herself trying to put the idea of vibrating objects and Alfie together. “I don't mind the ties, think that's the one thing any person has experimented around with before. It's that mix of giving up control and also being taken care of I guess that is kind of nice!” There it went, she had just thought there was a moment of them actually having similar experiences with something and there he went, talking about being rimmed which was way too much for her head to wrap around. “So it's boobs for you?” Gigi asked trying say something, anything that wasn't going to leave her speechless. “I mean people usually either go for boobs or ass, right?” The blonde concluded before she grinned “I do box, very well even, so you probably do not actually wanna get hit by me at all!” It was true, Gigi packed quite a punch even though it wasn't what he really meant, or what she had meant ultimately. “Is biting much about pain? I think it's more of a marking kind of thing...claiming what is yours..!”

“In my family it's tradition to excel at everything we do, we don't do things just for the sake of it. It's how I was raised. But yes, riding is a big thing. We, my sister and I, we were both trained as equestrians, but gave it up when we moved to New-York. I also do Ballet, but that's just to lengthen and lean those muscles. It kind of goes hand in hand with the Boxing, both great workouts, but very different and effective. Nothing glittery, nothing large, nor big or….weird!” Those were her limits basically and she couldn't help but laugh at her own statement and while she was talking to him about this and how this was all very much a real conversation she still had not really wrapped her head around the fact that they’d eventually actually do that. “Flavors?” Her eyes widened and while she was about to reply the shop assistant seemed to be all too eager to help once again “If you don't like the idea of flavor we always have neutral lubes, or of course ones that actually serve more purpose even, maybe one that adds a bit of a tingle?” The woman asked almost overly excited and walked away probably to get what she had been talking about, all while Gigi stared at Alfie with a confused, yet amused look on her face. “I was gonna say peanut butter but I don't know if I wanna mess that flavor up with added mental images….so...why again would we need this? And don't tell me the actual usage of lube or I might scream!” She warned teasingly, actually well aware what lube was for, she might have been slightly new to all of this..sex toy thing, but lube was something she knew.

„I can see you thinking about it,“ he teased her with a laugh, it was adorable to watch her blush, the redness of her skin vanishing under the hoodie. „Honestly, it’s nothing too out there - at least for me. As for ties, sure, everyone has done that, question is whether they actually enjoyed it or not. And - what the result of being tied up was. See, getting teased to the point of ecstasy, keeping them there and going on until they descend into sweet release? That’s powerful. That’s where you want to be taken.“ Her abrupt change of topic had him look at her worriedly for a moment, then he relaxed and shrugged his shoulders. „Anyone who says they’re not a breast person is lying. Tits are awesome. Though I very much prefer the whole person to just a part of them - so much more to discover. Since you were asking - what are you?“ There was no need for her to reply to him, but he was curious and their banter was too good to let go of completely. Surely, they would have to talk this whole deal through eventually, properly, that was - if there was the off-chance of her not wanting to do it, he wouldn’t. That was one thought that remained at the back of his mind throughout their conversation. „I’ll make sure to never have you punch me, then. Not into pain, remember?“ Now that she said it, the thought of leaving a mark her was on his mind, and kinda overwhelmed any other - damn it, it was hard to focus, when she looked at him like that. „You’re right about that, but it’s also very much about finding that point between pleasure and pain - you wouldn’t want to bite someone’s skin off… unless you’re a zombie. Then that might be your thing.“

Her family definitely sounded interesting - like everyone else, he had heard and read a few things about the Hadids, and whether they were all true or not, they came to mind, when she spoke of her family and how they were taught to excel. “For me it’s rowing, football and cricket. A bit of rugby with mates, maybe. They’re all just to keep fit and active, and apart from rowing they can be played in-between takes.” Her requests weren’t all out there, and he had to laugh at the “nothing glittery” part, anyone who said models were alike lied big time. “Okay, that’s not too bad. Any colour of choice?” The shop assistant interrupted them, and for once Alfie growled a little under his breath, since she, yet again, made it all sound way more complicated than it should be. “Maybe the peanut butter would blush and hide when it knew what we had planned?” he said, head bent so he could mutter in her ear without the shop assistant hearing him. He found that he liked being close to her, and since she didn’t seem to mind, he stuck to it. Her. “It’s honestly just a precaution, because most devices can be cold or feel weird, whether as with lube -” he stopped talking to look at her and grin back. “Since you don’t want me to tell you about its use, you might just have to find out what else you can do with it. And - yes, flavoured, because the neutral stuff doesn’t really taste all that great.” As the shop assistant scurried away, motioning them to follow her, he found himself rooted to the spot, lips pursed. “So we have ice cubes, ties, tiny toys and lube - and the edible underwear for your sister, let’s not forget about that.” Alfie rested his arm lightly across her shoulders, as they walked towards the back of the shop. “Pretty sure I don’t have to ask you about what you’d like to wear, so… I think we might be set?” All but for the fact that he still had to choose the toys they were to play with eventually. “It wasn’t that bad, was it? Coming here?” Oh, the pun - he rolled his eyes at himself.

---

It was true, most people had experienced ropes or ties at some point, even though Alfie had judged 50 Shades a lot it was kind of true that the books and the movie made the entire bondage thing, at least tying someone up a lot more ‘fashionable’ “I mean it's powerful I guess. I think it's just the idea of giving up control that works for many people. Especially when you can't exactly give up control in your everyday life. Also I think isn't it about trust? I don't even know, I am just guessing!” Gigi finally added grinning, to make sure that she wasn't talking about herself necessarily. “Well boobs are a god given thing, an ass though is something you work for, so really, bums all the way!” Gigi told him laughing but really, all of her friends had amazing behinds and there was not a doubt that this was quite hard work to keep it that way. “You should know the amount of squats happen backstage before the Victoria's Secret show, it's proof that bums are much better than boobs!” The blonde concluded laughing before she wondered about the next, somewhat interesting topic they were headed towards. “I just feel like marks aren't cute once you passed a certain age. In High school it's so on trend to have a love bite visible, now it's just work to cover them!” Now she did sound like she was actually much older than she was, but it was true, any kind of mark on her body would ultimately only result in more makeup and questions on set. “But it's true, that is all about a mix of pain and pleasure, mostly because it only feels right if you feel enough pleasure in that moment!” Otherwise she’d be sure to tell any guy to not mark her skin or leave bruises.

“I think I would hide whenever the peanut butter was around, not vice versa!” Gigi admitted laughing before she actually thought about the fact and it was true, she like peanut butter way too much to actually associate anything but PBJ Sandwiches with it. “You’re not good at selling this when you are telling me that it feels weird and cold which is exactly what I am already thinking and what is kind of why I am so very hesitant of this whole toys thing to begin with!” Looking at him she playfully rolled her eyes before she made a face “And why would I wanna taste it now? I wasn't planning on eating it so is taste really important?” When he again mentioned what they had on their ‘list’ she was wondering when they had gotten serious about this. Especially when she was getting serious about this. She couldn't actually tell if this was a good or an absolutely terrible idea. Part of her wanted to tell him how this wouldn't be something serious, how this was really one of the first times she even considered sleeping with someone she wasn't dating and then she almost wanted to add how she wasn't planning on dating someone right now, but who knew if this was even something to tell people. She was honestly just mighty confused right now, but weirdly enough not in a negative way. “I wanna object that I am still not sure about the underwear for my sister, I might just go to Agent Provocateur and get her something she’ll actually use, wear and...eventually will be enjoyed by someone else, a thought I hate! She just launched a pretty big thing in her career so an actual gift seems more in order...than underwear she could also eat! She’d love it if it was underwear made out of hot cheetos though!” When he mentioned that he’d be sure that she’d know what to wear she chuckled “Did you just admit that you’re like a visual guy? Underwear counts for you?” It took her a moment to realize why he had laughed and rolled his eyes at himself, the pun he made way more obvious to him apparently than it had been to her which by itself made her laugh “I am still not convinced about this trip here to be fair, but you made it much less frightening...that much is sure!”

---

„I don’t even know, she says - see, I don’t quite believe you, I say.“ The lack of flushing and floundering about gave her away, and it made him want to ask more about what she had been experimenting with, but somehow - it was more fun to have her give away what she was comfortable with. Anything else… he would either find out eventually, or he wouldn’t. It didn’t take away from their banter however, and her explanation as to why bums were superior to tits had him grin broadly. „Can I remind you that generally you’re born with an arse, too? And if you have an arse like a stone slab… that’s a bit too much, there needs to be something to grab onto,“ he remarked. While he had almost forgotten that he was actually talking to a supermodel here, she was sure to remind him of it by commenting on backstage moments, which no one would ever see, unless they were allowed back there. „Now you’re just being unfair by putting such mental images in my head in the first place, love.“ Gigi certainly had a point about leaving marks on someone, they weren’t cute after a certain age, although he found that there was a large difference between a small red spot and a large haematoma. The latter firmly belonged in the Twilight section and wasn’t what he had had in mind, at all. „It’s a spur of the moment thing, more than anything. If you don’t feel it, you won’t let it happen. That’s an easy enough rule to follow, I’m sure. Poor sap who is told no, though.“ Once more he smiled at her - how they had gone from ties to tits to bite marks was beyond him, but he was too amused to try and find something else to talk about at the moment.

„Afraid of peanut butter - who’d have thought?“ he muttered and let his smile widen to another bright grin. „I’m just being honest, I thought you’d appreciate that. If you want me to lie to you, that’s possible, too, of course. No matter what, it’ll feel odd for you at first, unusual, too, and you’ll just have to trust yourself or whomever is using them on you to make you feel good. The lube is just to help you along, since it’s warm and scented…“ Alfie almost laughed at her facial expression, and even more so at her question. She could so easily match his wit strike for strike, but when it came to the easy things… he didn’t even know whether he should tell her why it should have a flavour that they might prefer. In the end, he left it at, „No one said it was you who’d have to taste it.“ Being that close to her, he could feel the hesitation rolling off her in waves, and suddenly felt bad for having pushed her into a corner that easily. It was one thing to tease someone about it, banter with them and take them out of their comfort zone, it was a whole other to actually go through with it. Whatever was, or maybe wasn’t, going to happen, it was her decision entirely, and he knew he would accept it whichever way it went. For now, he would simply focus on the present, and let her make up her mind about it. „You could always ask, whether they have hot Cheetos underwear lying around. Maybe that’s a limited edition only?“ They made their way to the counter, where he leaned against it, while the shop assistant finished up their, well his, purchase. „I can admit that I do like it when someone makes an effort - though it’s not really the underwear that counts, but the person in it. And, of course, being able to take it off them." He paid for his brother’s present and received a small intricately designed bag for it. „Well, that concludes it, I guess,“ he smiled at her. „You can message me, or call, when you’ve made up your mind about it - I’m game, if you are, but it is, and remains, your decision entirely.“ Having said that, he leaned in and kissed her cheek, then left the shop with a small spring in his step.

#para;#longest thing ever

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