#I honestly don't understand how it can still be made in 2023

[krissiebucks]

sigh

[evertomorrowart]

Best of YouTube 2023

Yes, I did spend the first week and change of January on this. I wish I could have had it done for New Years, but too many people came out with incredible work in December, so waiting turned out for the best.

What these creators do are a huge influence on my life, I would honestly have difficulty doing what I do without them. That isn't to say that my favorites of the year are *only* on this image--It was almost impossible to narrow down my favorites. Many creators I wanted to include couldn't fit on a single page, and too many of them made more than one video I wished I could draw too!

But, to all of you, thank you for what you do. You're an inspiration.

For those who don't know, further is an explanation.

At the bottom center is an artistic masterpiece by Defunctland: "Journey to EPCOT Center: A Symphonic History." Over the last several years, Defunctland has risen from delightfully-entertaining commentary on decommissioned theme park attractions to occasionally dropping profound statements on the creation of art itself. "Journey to EPCOT Center: A Symphonic History" is worth treating like the cinematic experience it is: No second screen, you sit your ass down in front of a TV, set down the phone, and then you *watch it.* Any Disney, theme park, or independent film fan needs to pay attention to this one.

Bottom left is Caelan Conrad with their piece "Drop the T - The Deadly Consequences of Gay Respectability Politics." While I do think they've done more visually or artistically-daring pieces before, "Drop the T" is one of the most important videos released on YouTube in today's current climate of hate. We as queer folk (and our allies) need to understand how integral every identity of the queer experience has been since the start of the Civil Rights movement (and before!). While we are not identical, we *are* inseparable, and we deserve having our real history easily accessible.

TERFs and other conservative mouthpieces need not reply. Your opinions are trash. 😘

I cannot stop watching and rewatching this video by @patricia-taxxon, "On the Ethics of Boinking Animal People." It's not just a defense of furry fandom and its eccentricities, it's a thoughtful and passionate analysis of what the artform achieves that purely human representation can't. Patricia goes outside of her usual essay format to directly speak to the viewer about the elements that define furry media (the most succinct definition I've ever heard) and just how *human* an act loving animal cartoons really is.

As an artist who can draw furry characters, but never really got into erotic furry art, this video is a treasure. Why did I choose to have her drawn as a Ghibli character, hanging out with one of the tanukis from "Pom Poko?" Guess you'll have to watch, bruh.

Philosophy Tube continuously puts out videos that I would put on this list--I'm not even sure that "A Man Plagiarised my Work: Women, Money, and the Nation" is the best work she released in 2023. However, this video got many conversations going between myself and my partner, and the twist on the tail end of the video shocked us both to such a degree that I had no choice.

At the very tail end of the year, Big Joel released "Fear of Death." On his Little Joel channel, he described it as the singularly best video he's ever done, and I'm inclined to agree. However, for this illustration, I ended up repeatedly going back to a mini-series he did earlier in the year: "Three Stories at the End of the World." All three videos are deeply moving and haunting, and I was brought to tears by "We Must Destroy What the Bomb Cannot." While it may be relatively-common knowledge that the original Gojira (Godzilla) film is horror grappling with the devastation America's rush to atomic dominance inflicted on Japan, Big Joel still manages to bring new words to the discussion. Please watch all three of the videos, but if, for some reason, you must have only one, let it be "We Must Destroy What the Bomb Cannot."

Y'all. Let me confess something. I hate football. I hate watching it, I associate seeing it from the stadiums with some of my worst childhood experiences, I despise collegiate and professional football (as institutions that destroy bodies and offer up children at the feet of its alter as a pillar of American culture)--

I. L o a t h e. Football.

But.

F.D. Signifier could get me to watch an entire hour-plus essay on why I should at least give a passing care. AND HE DID IT. I might think "F*ck the Police," the two-parter on Black conservatism, or his essay on Black men's connection to anime might be "better" videos, but this writer did the impossible and held my limited attention span towards football long enough to make a sincere case for NFL players--and reminds us that millionaires can *in fact* be workers. That alone is testament to his skill.

Sit down and watch "The REAL Reason NFL Running Backs Aren't Getting Paid." Any good anti-capitalist owes it to themselves.

CJ the X continuously puts out stunning, emotional videos, and can do it with the most seemingly-inconsequential starting points. A 30 second song? An incestuous commercial? Five minutes of Tangled? Sure, why not. Go destroy yourself emotionally by watching them. I'm serious. Do it.

Their video Stranger Things and the Meaning of Life manages to to remind us all why the way we react to media does, in fact, matter. Yes, even nostalgia-driven, mass-media schlock. Yes, how we interact with media matters, what it says about us matters, and we all deserve to seek out the whys.

Folding Ideas has spent the last few years articulating exactly why so much of our modern world feels broken, and because of that his voice continuously lives rent-free in my brain. While the tricks that scam artists and grifters use to try to swindle us are never new, the advancement of technology changes the aesthetics of their performances. Portions of Folding Ideas' explanations might seem dry when going into detail of how stocks work in This is Financial Advice, but every bit of it is necessary to peel back the layers of techno-babble and jargon and make sense of the results of "Meme Stocks."

Jessie Gender puts out nothing but bangers, her absolute unit of a video about Star Wars might be my new favorite thing ever, but none of her work hit so profoundly in 2023 than the two-parter "The Myth of 'Male Socialization'" and "The Trauma of Masculinity." There's so much about modern life that isolates and traumatizes us, and so much of it is just shrugged off as "normal." We owe it to ourselves to see the world in more vivid a color palette than we're initially given.

Panels drawn after Kate Beaton and "Ducks: Two Years in the Oil Sands."

"This is Not a Video Essay" is one of the most intense and beautiful pieces of art I've ever put into my eyeballs. Why do we create? What drives us to connect?

I don't even know what else to say about the Leftist Cooks' work, it repeatedly transcends the medium and platform. Watch every single one of their videos, but especially this one.

The likelihood you are terminally online and yet haven't heard of Hbomberguy's yearly forrays into destroying the careers of awful people is pretty slim. Just because it has millions of views doesn't mean that Hbomberguy's "Plagiarism and You(Tube)" isn't worth the hype. Too long? Shut up, it has chapters and YouTube holds your place, anyway. You think a deep dive into a handful of creators is only meaningless drama? Well, you're wrong, you wrong-opinion-haver. Plagiarism is an *everyone* problem because of the actual harm it creates--the history it erases, the labor it devalues, the art it marginalizes--which you would know if you watched "Plagiarism and You(Tube)".

Watch. The damn. Video.

In fact, watch all of them!

Thanks for reading this if you did.

[deerspherestudios]

📖FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS📖

Regarding asks, I typically avoid:

stacked questions (asks that have more than one question, so honestly, sending them one by one is better than writing a bunch in one go)

hyperspecific scenarios (while I enjoy answering these, some can get incredibly specific to the point where it doesn't even feel fun anymore)

questions that have already been answered (obviously)

To manage the blog, I usually queue up asks instead of posting them instantly, so it might take several weeks for me to respond. Please be patient! And while I appreciate the time and thought taken to writing me a message and the growing interest in the game, understand I'm still one person and will sometimes leave a message unanswered. Thank you. ❤️

Below is a compilation of questions I get a lot, so if you have a question feel free to check if it's already been answered! The list will update as needed:

🎮 F.A.Q ABOUT THE GAME 🎮

1. What is Mushroom Oasis❔ What is the rating❔

Mushroom Oasis is a visual novel made in Ren'Py that was initially released for the 2023 Yandere Game Jam. It's currently still in development as a solo project. I post updates almost exclusively on this tumblr so if you're interested in the game, you're in the right place. The rating is 16+. How did I come up with the concept?

2. How many days will the game have❔ When will it release❔

I initially planned it to have 4-5 days! But with some new ideas and routes I'm considering, it might extend to 5+ days. As for a release date, it's done when it's done. So please allow me the time to develop it at my pace <3

3. Will the game be translated to other languages❔

I'll be honest, I had no plans to. However, a few people have reached out volunteering to. I'll say for now I'm open to the idea, but I prefer people asking permission first. First and foremost, ask first.

4. Will the game be available for mobile❔

For now, a hard no. I have zero clue how to make it available for mobile. Maybe I'll consider it once the game is fully released, but it's only for PC and Mac for now, as those are the default builds in Ren'Py.

5. Is NSFW content allowed❔

Considering the main love interest is an adult, that's fine. However I'd appreciate proper filtering of NSFW content considering the game's age rating means there's more than a few minors in the fandom. NSFW questions aren't allowed on the blog.

Keep it where it's meant to be with proper tagging separate from the '#mushroom oasis vn' tag. Using '#mushroom oasis nsfw' should be enough? I hope.

NOTE: Now, I understand some people are really passionate about Mychael being asexual, but I can't bring myself to police people for mischaracterizing his asexuality, nor would I want to gatekeep him either.

He's a fictional character first and foremost, and while representation is important!!!/gen /srs I don't want to bring attention to any such content in case it brings unwanted harrassment on that creator for posting such content.

Please don't do that. Let people make what they wanna make. It's unfortunate, but fandom will be fandom.

6. Will there be other love interests? Will it have multiple endings❔

Due to project scope, the only romance-able character for MO is Mychael himself. The game will have multiple endings however, ranging from romantic ending, platonic ending to creepy/bad endings (because, y'know, yandere).

7. Will there be official merch?

As a college student and soon-to-be fresh graduate, the income would be nice haha. As I keep working on the game (and once I'm done with college in March) I'll definitely look into making them someday!

🍄 F.A.Q ABOUT MYCHAEL🍄

1. What are his pronouns and sexuality and age❔

He identifies as male, uses he/him pronouns and is a panromantic asexual. He's older than you think. ::-)

2. What is his height❔

He's 6'2. He used to be 5'8.

3. When is his birthday❔

Initially it was 15th February! Simply because I happened to start designing him that day, hence his 'creation'.

I might pick another date though; for now, his birthday is undecided.

4. Favorite food and drink❔

He loves fried mushrooms and tomato juice! He hates spicy food though, as the smell and taste makes him physically ill.

5. Do you have a voice claim for him❔

Initially it was Jonathan Groff, specifically his role as Kristoff in Frozen. But nowadays I'm not sure. Feel free to give suggestions! Do note I imagine him sounding as an older male in his late 20s.

6. What is Mychael's love language❔

I explain it in-depth here!

TL;DR: He likes giving gifts, and likes receiving words of affirmation.

7. How is Mychael's affection towards MC (blog-centric only)❔

So for context, as I manage the blog sometimes Mychael makes an appearance in answered asks. His answers can change depending on when you ask at the current state of the demo:

Day 1:

Day 2:

It's just something for fun as I manage the blog when answering asks. (Though don't expect a solid implementation of this anytime soon, as I'm busy with college until March 2024. Until then!)

EXTRAS:

Mychael's Character Ref

Firefly (MC)'s Character Ref

Mychael's Playlist

Mushroom Oasis' Playlist

Bad Ending 1 Explained

[byghostface]

BATMAN AND ROBIN(2023) #8 SPOILERS

Their faces😭 He is so mad and she is so sad and clinging to him to apologize for her action😭😭

Honestly, Nika is partially telling her truth to Damian here, she only asked for Damian to help her find her sister, and he did, so she thanked him, promising to talk later. She just trying to buy time for her plans to work while stopping Damian from getting more involved and making Mila trust her.

Look at how cheerful and cute Nika is with her sister… Mila is so pretty… they are so cutee☹️☹️🥲

This is probably the first time they’re having fun and understanding each other, and Nika already knows she has made the decision to sacrifice this possible renewed kinship by betraying Mila's trust while keeping her safe. ( look at her sad face ungghggh my baby ueueee😭😭😭 she knows she will have two people she loves mad at her simultaneously in one single night…)

Just thinking that Nika still cares about her sister a lot, and probably knows this criminal life will not do well for Mila in the longest run, so she track her down and decided to make a plan to get her out… And all this time Mila is blinded by jealousy of not having power as her, then when she gets the power she doesn't even once try to find Nika😭😞😞

I'm just hoping Nika will keep in touch with their mother and tell her what happened to Mila…

Nika immediately blasts Mila with the ice guns once Mila wants to severely harm and poses a danger to Damian. Mila must have called Nika weirdo so many times as an insult when they were little kids, cuz Nika is still mad about this (I don't blame her, you go girl!! Tell her to back off, seems like your sister still doesn't know that words still hurt).

Nika came to him and Batman to ask for help to find her sister and make sure it would be fine for her to handle Mila's situation (minimal the chance for Mila to be sent to Gotham prison, and stick to her plan). She explains her plan and actions to Damian and tells him that it's not all an act with him.

She wants to return the favor by helping his cases and making sure that's fine with him too (She's so open to talk and gentle to Damian here… and meanwhile he looked so sad thinking she's leaving again so soon😭).

Man-bat in Nikola's style is sooo good!!! I love how he looks here, so brutal and threatening! This page is one of my favorite.

Love these panels too, Batman being dragged into the darkness by Man-bat… Shush why are you looking so shook here, even though Batman save you from Man-bat's strike a few seconds before… I thought you wanted him dead?

Erica's face lowkey reminds me of that one Shrek image… she's so funny with that stare she gave to Damian😂

NIKA IN HER CIVIL CLOTHES‼️‼️RAAAAA I LOVE IT SMMM😭😭♥️♥️♥️SHE LOOKS SO FRICKING ADORABLE‼️😭😇😇🙏💕💕

The tie, the red skirt and the knee-high boots… She's my everythinggg🥹🥺🫶♥️🖤💕💕

Can't wait for the next issue! If Ms. Hall is actually Shush, it would be so interesting for her to see Damian sneaking Nika into school to help him try to uncover the principal as Shush.

I had a feeling that in the next issue, Nika would punch Damian's bullies for calling him names (look how she did with her sister, she definitely would not tolerate that I fear), or something they planned together this time would happen to get both of them to the detection.

(I'm kinda sad that Mila's appearance is so short, hopefully she can return in later issues… reasons number 97676443178 why I need a Flatline solo!! To explore more with her family!!!🙏🙏)

.

Batman and Robin(2023) #8 spoilers- preview thoughts．issue thoughts

[born-in-hell]

Ive been seeing lots of opinions on the QSMP admin situation here, after both Dapper and Pomme resigned and Quackity's statement, and i feel like some things should be said:

Firstly, yes, the abusive higher ups are to blame, immensely. But Quackity, as the CEO, is not free of responsibility. Not being involved, at all, with such an immense project, as the head of it all, is honestly so insane.

(I genuinely believed he didn't participate on the QSMP as a player because he worked so much behind the scenes, and it's unbelievable to me how he lied to us all.)

We must remember this is his project. With his name. He won awards and recognition worldwide because of it. He has so much to lose with all this situation. Money, reputation, friends.

Lets remember the admins have nothing to lose, at this point. They have no reason to cover things up or lie, unlike the Quackity Studios higher up team.

Now, about the statement he made last night.

The "legal reasons" — despite being a coherent explanation for not telling us, the audience, anything — arent an excuse for completely ghosting his employees. In fact, communicating actively with the people that work for him, could avoid him a lawsuit.

The leaks are not an excuse for not communicating w his employees. Keep in mind, Léa only came out because of the lack of communication. If Quackity had dealt with this stuff internally — as he should've done — Léa wouldn't have gone public in the first place.

Grouping all these people — the exploited and tired workers and the disappointed fans — into mere "haters" and saying they all just want the project to fail and to ruin Quackity's image is a really bad faith statement. Either he does not understand the situation (which is, imo, still really bad for him as the owner and CEO) or he just wants to discredit every and all criticism.

I can bet u every single admin in there put their heart and soul into the project. Their 2023 was defined by the project. They withstood way too much just so the project and Quackity's image would be protected, that's why we never heard about any of the exploitative conditions they worked under until Léa came out.

Most — if not all — of the admins signed up bc they love the QSMP, and wanted to help make it the best it could be.

But everyone has a limit. And this was theirs.

This might not be the end of the QSMP. But how will it hold up to what it was, without the eggs, the fun NPCs, the french, and Bad? I dont know.

About the Union:

Not emailing Quackity and waiting for him to contact them is certainly one of the decisions ever made. I don't quite understand the logic behind it, to be honest. It's not illegal, as far as i know, and i don't know how common that is, despite believing it's not very.

And i don't believe we should hold Quackity entirely responsible for not talking to them. Although, someone, like Aypierre, or Bad, or Antoine, or anyone else that has access to him and knows about the Union's involvement, must've told him.

Or not, we don't know.

And about the statement being public, i believe it was intentional. It's a public threat to him. They don't merely want to sue Quackity Studios, they want us, the fans, to know why they want to sue and that they are going to sue if they can't reach an agreement.

They are mobilizing the audience.

If that's a good move or not, judge it yourself.

I just believe not holding Quackity accountable for his decisions, as the owner of the company is wrong. And holding him accountable is not the same as hating the project.

[mywons]

៹ bf!maknae-line enha when you don't know anything about k-pop prior to meeting them.

▸ ִֶָ tags est. enha x fem!reader + teasinggg + really just cute ass fluff + kisses + the maknae line being super super annoying ,, i hate love them so bad + niki being lovingly mean. warnings! && none really !! REQUESTED : could i request boyfriend!enha w a girlfriend who didn't know much ab kpop before meeting them? ✿ 0.5k words —

## HEADCANONS UNDER THE CUT !

kim sunoo !

he would tease you but probably would have so much fun turning you into the biggest kpop stan ever

so, he's kinda happy you don't know anything because it's something you guys can spend time together talking about <3

probably quizzes you on the members of his favorite groups

you go to all of their concerts <3

if you start liking another group a little too much he is not happy

"you like them more than enhypen huh??"

oh and don't even let him find out you bias anyone but him???? he will act like it's the actual end of the world

loves acting like he's upset bc you don't know/understand a certain thing ab the industry bc you're so cute when you're apologizing profusely even tho he tells you it's a joke immediately afterwards

^^ "dramatic gasp how could you not know!!!!"

two seconds later he's kissing every piece of you he can reach

yang jungwon !

literally doesn't care ??$!7#??

like honestly. he just goes oh & moves on ab his day

when you guys get closer he's like "you don't need to know any groups that aren't enhypen"

like he thinks it's cute you've been able to avoid knowing anything ab kpop for so long, and now he wants to keep it that way bc you're his :((

plus he knows firsthand how bad the industry can seem sometimes, so other than playful jealousy, he genuinely doesn't want you to be corrupted by that

naturally he's very protective & that translates into your relationship

but he may introduce you to some of his favorite idols because you're still a very important part of his life (and he wants everyone to know how wonderful his girlfriend is)

buys you some of his photocards to put in your phone<3

teaches you the easiest parts of enhypen's choreography for the very small and reasonable price of cuddles

just so adorable omg !!

nishimura riki !

the biggest tease ever

like it literally does not matter how little you know & it doesn't matter how much you learn as you guys date, he will always find a way to poke fun at you not knowing anything before your relationship

you could be a kpop expert once you become his gf and he's still like "awh you're finally learning something" in the most condescending way ever

absolutely loves teaching you his choreos even if you're horrible at dancing

if he hears a good song he adds it to the playlist he made for you to listen to more kpop—"oh i think my girl would enjoy this one"

needs your approval for literally everything. he could be standing in front of you & a dancing coach + he'll still be like "jagi, how did i do???"

^^ the members tease him but he literally doesn't care. sure you're clueless but you're his & he needs your praise !!

probably lies ab what some kpop stan vocab actually means to make you look silly

not a big fan of you stanning other groups especially bgs but he'll tolerate it ig only because he loves seeing how happy you are when he surprises you with concert tickets

just so perfect in every way,, the best bf you could ask for

mywons © 2023 ## please do not plagiarize my works.

[sinimake]

Big agree with what you said about Johnshi. I've been in fandoms for a fuckton long time and this isn't new but damn does it bother me that in the year 2023 we still have to go through this.

It isn't only how the story goes for both Kenshi and Johnny (they meet at their lowest, go through hell together and come out of it as better people). It's also the banter in the intros (not only between them but also the fact that Kenshi and Johnny talk about each other to the others). And don't get me started with how their designs work : the blindfold is now forever tied to Johnny and the whole red/blue design going on.

But no. We can't have what would be the most organic relationship in the whole MK1 story. Instead we have Syzoth and Ashrah (which, don't take me wrong I LOVE them both) who happen to breath in the same room and possibly bond outside of the mainstory?

Agh sorry for the rant but sometimes I get bitter bc we couuuld have it aaaaaall >:(

EXACTLY 😤😤 I AM SO MAD!!!

Let me rant some more about this.

NRS was the first to introduce the first ever gay character in the fighter style video games. Love them for it, love that Taleena is canon. However, they're still pussayh for not making johnshi canon.

So i have been fangirl for more than a decade and IT IS ALWAYS THE SAME DAMN PROBLEM WITH BIG PRODUCTION COMPANIES they're so afraid of public backlash.

Let me tell you why not making Johnshi canon situation is different from Taleena and Kung Jin by opening big ass can of worms.

1. MK is dominated by cis hetero males. Yes, many people from various bg play the game, but it is undeniably true that the majority of fan base is men.

2. There's a phenomenon called the fetishization of lesbian and bisexual women. I am aware that I'm being controversial by saying this, but this fetishization makes the general public be more "accepting" of lesbain couple than the rest of the queer community, and it resonates mostly in straight men where they see queer women as objects that are simply putting on a show for the enjoyment of those watching.

This leads to my next point that it is a high probability that Taleena is allowed to be canon because the backlash from the cis hetero male fan base will be less than having gay relationship in the game. And let me tell you, Taleena interaction is bare minimum in the story mode!! I mean, yeah, they're trying to hide their relationship from others and the story is not exactly focused on them but they can be so much more! I can gloss over the lack of taleena content but was hoping for more in the future installment. But guess fucking what? Alternate universe Tanya and Mileena are rumored to be married to men in the upcoming mk1 side story.

Like imagine the vast possibility of having alternate universes where you can notch up the teased Forbidden Lovers trope but instead of having Taleena being happily united, NRS makes their only queer relationship straight???? *maniacal laugh* Honestly i will fight NRS on SIGHT. In my eyes, this only proves that they don't really care about queer representation, they're just filling the diversity qouta.

3. With what i said, NRS is a fucking coward for not making their popular male characters gay. You might bring up my boy Kung Jin but listen to me, debuting new queer character and making existing fan favorite character queer are completely different things. Kung Jin is first introduced in MK X and his sexual orientation is subtly suggested in the game. While Johnny Cage has been rated among the top Mortal Kombat characters by various gaming media publications.

If NRS made Johnny gay and in a relationship with Kenshi, imagine how fucking big the media coverage of them would have been. Literally, the second coming of that beer company queer backlash would have happened. Every gaming news outlet would be making articles on it. Johnshi would be trending on twitter.

I understand that it would be quite a risk to that to your business but guess what? They gave the most organic, the most heartfelt, the most tender story arc (ok i could be lil baised but you cant deny the chemistry) then slapped good ol' guys being pals and best friends forever crap on them 🙃

If Johnny and Kenshi were opposite gender, no cap, NO FUCKING CAP THAT THEY WOULD HAVE A FUCKING COUPLE.

4. I think Johnshi arc takes almost half of the story mode because we go through Johnny, Raiden, Kenshi, Baraka, Ashrah, Syzoth POVs till they come back from Outworld mission and in every chapter, Johnny and Kenshi get significant moments. And those moments are exclusive to only two of them, specifically tailored to them.

People say they're just friends, but i think the difference really shines if you consider that Kung Lao and Raiden are equally friends with them too. During outworld mission, Kung Lao has minimal dailogues and screen time when Johnny and Kenshi have interaction. If Kenshi and Johnny were just friends, they should have shown Kung Lao's reaction to Kenshi's blinding, Kung Lao's worry for Kenshi in the Shang Tsung's real laboratory, Kung Lao's line for Kenshi's regained sight RIGHT ALONG SIDE WITH JOHNNY.

What Kenshi and Johnny have exclusively belongs to them. That sets the difference between platonic friendship and the connection of those two.

Straight couples have less fucking interaction than one fucking scene and they are magically together. So tell me why the fuck Johnshi is not real

They SHOULD BE REAL and I'm so DONE with NRS

[celerydays]

☁️ 2024 Artist Resolutions ☁️

Happy New Year, everyone! 🌻

Just sharing my annual artist resolutions (this is my 3rd year doing this, I think?):

colors & palettes: I would like to try and experiment more with color, including probably (re-)teaching myself color theory (and actually trying to understand it this time lol), working with more mindful color choices like limited palettes and overall trying to use color to make more visually interesting pieces.

video content: I actually really like the process filming and editing little progress/behind-the-scenes videos, but I didn't do much of that at all this year. I'd honestly like to go back to doing some of that again! Also I had a brief stint of streaming art on Twitch around this time a year ago and haven't gone back to it...still on the fence but I may revisit that as well this year.

comics: I've always enjoyed drawing silly little daily life comics and would like to continue with that, but 2023 made me realize how much I also enjoy creating more long-form webtoon and comic book-like pieces as well! I definitely want to explore and expand more upon that in 2024~

composition: I've been very lazy about composition! Going back to wanting to use color to create more visually interesting pieces, I'd also like to focus more on composition to do the same as well.

(soft) freelance: I used to have an online shop that I shut down almost 3 years ago now...I don't know what I feel brave enough to tackle this year in terms of being an independent artist outside of my day job; whether that's commissions, ko-fi/patreon, product design for a shop reopening or tabling at conventions, but I hope I'll figure it out and get over my hesitations about it...soon.

sketching & journaling: I really super-mega-absolutely neglected sketching and journaling for the entirety of 2023 which TRULY HURTS MY JOURNAL-LOVING HEART. I want to try some things to find a new system of sketch-journaling that fits my time and lifestyle better these days so I can incorporate that back into my life.

My previous artist resolutions from 2023 and 2022~

I think I only really got to two goals from my 2023 list; drawing more backgrounds and entering my 'villain era' by drawing more selfishly (though I'll be honest: I didn't expect that to manifest the way it did when I had written it out, but yeah okay, smutty art it is I suppose lmaooo)

We don't talk about 2022 lol.

Hope everyone is having a great start to the new year~ Relax! Rest! Recharge! And may we achieve all (or at least most of) our goals we're hoping to in 2024 💗

[ayahimes]

𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐏𝐘 𝐍𝐄𝐖 𝐘𝐄𝐀𝐑 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟒

hi friends ! i know i'm a bit late with my post but i still wanted to post something regardless . 2023 had been one of the hardest years of my life thus far outside of the rpc , and even in it to be honest . i lost some good friends but gained some too . i've gotten to know so many of you on a deeper level and bonded with a lot of you over shared interests . so many of you have been patient with me on this blog because of school and for that i am immensely thankful ; i know you all followed because of your interest to write and i do apologize for not being able to fully deliver that due to my busy schedule . however , i do want to allot some time this year to be better about my time management . i honestly can't wait to see what this year brings !

𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐘𝐀𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐑𝐎 𝐂𝐎𝐌𝐌𝐈𝐒𝐒𝐈𝐎𝐍 (´｡• ᵕ •｡`) ♡

@diaboelic : courtney . one of my best friends . i know i can write essays on why i am so happy to have you in my life but i promise i'll condense it . it's so crazy to me that we've been friends for almost two full years . it's wild because it honestly feels much longer . i know we're both busy making big moves and even if we don't talk every day i am always rooting for you . you're so down to earth and somehow understand how i'm feeling without me having to say it . please keep sending me fanart and spamming me with ig reels . i take forever to look at them sometimes but i love them !! also , im sorry you lost your streak in duolingo but i still think you're ahead of me by like 4 days everytime i do it . COURTNEY - SAN WA WATASHINO SUKINA HITORIDE ( i think this was right but probably not lmfao ) . i can't wait to hopefully explore japan with you . fingers crossed it's this year haha

@visionhcld : b , i will always write nice things about you no matter what . you've been my friend for like .... what .... this would be 6 years ?!!! GOD . you've seen the best and the worst . crazy to think that we made it !!!!! i love you so damn much and i am so lucky to have you in my life . i know we don't write a million active threads atm or talk every day like we used to , but i assure you it doesn't change our friendship . i love being able to pick up where we left off like nothing ever happened tbh . some people don't have that and tbh , i'm so fortunate to have found that with you . we have a ridiculous amount of inside jokes and years of history to pick apart but i leave you with one . jejota !!!

@fairesky : shado . we found each other through the funniest circumstances but i am so happy we did . you have been one of my closest friends these last two years and through you i met some other amazingly wonderful people ( cough leon cough ) . your kindness is immeasurable and i have truly learned so much from you because of it . you've taught me how to be nicer , how to be a better friend , how to care for others in a way i'd like to be treated , and just overall improved my life the last year with your presence . i love you so much and i'm really happy to have gotten to know you better over the course of 2023 . who else will i be an absolute simp with if not you haha

@iirath: essek , i know you're already aware but i am so damn happy to have gotten to know you better over the last year , even more so the last few months . i enjoy talking to you about life and getting to learn about who you are beyond the surface level . you're honestly SO tilt proof ( lmaoooo ) and surely never get mad when we play league . SURELY . thanks for speed running stardew valley with me and letting me run around not knowing what to do while you carry our farm to its greatest potential . you really have become one of my good friends and please know i always look forward to your good morning message in the server with the tired cat emoji haha

@shokutsus : LEON !!!!!!! ayaki will always reign supreme and have the best ship name . i will fight anyone who says otherwise . okay but let me just say i fucking love you dude . i know we haven't had a chance to have our tea talks on fortnite the last few months but i admit , those were some of my favorites . you've helped me through some really tough times and been there for me as a friend when i needed someone the most . i really enjoy thinking of the wildest plot lines for our characters while sleep deprived and playing fortnite ( tbh crackabella and anakin lore was big brained of us ) or discussing with kaine and courtney which part of the centipede we'd be . weird shit but i laugh typing it out lol . okay but fr i want this year to be the best one yet for you !! ps . send more pixel photos

@rosahope : fae , thank you for becoming one of my good friends this year . i'm so blessed to have met someone as grounded as you and i don't tell you enough . i know i'm too much sometimes and impulsive af , but you are my voice of reason and i appreciate it so damn much . you've helped me think outside the box and take things one step at a time . you're one of the realest people and i always welcome your honesty even if it's not something i may initially agree with . tbh i think that's what makes you such a good friends because you're transparent with me . i really am so happy for your big moves with your new job and i am always rooting for you no matter what !! you'll always be my chibiusa and my jessie <3

@prettyguardian : niniiiiiii . firstly , thank you for coming into my life and being such an amazing friend . i admire your tenacity , your creativity , your openness , your vulnerability . the list goes on . you've been there for me when i sought some direction in my life and for that i want to thank you . i know we have yet to write more aerti things but please know i will always gladly write them with you . you've helped me heal with ff . i know that sentence may sound silly at some level but it is a big thing . really !! your friendship has only added improvement within my life and i can't wait to see where it goes this year . sending you all the good vibes for 2024 !!

@cybrvce : light !!!! i'm so fortunate to have gotten to know you more over the last year and actually write with you . your characterization is truly amazing and i'm always impressed with everything you write . yes im slow as molasses but i promise it doesn't mean it's because i don't care !! i just want to write for you when i'm at my best because i want to give you quality writing !! thank you for being patient with me though . you're so kind <3 i'm genuinely so excited to start this year with your friendship !!

@deadn30n : LOOK HERE ALEXANDRA . YOU MADE IT ON THIS LIST BECAUSE YOU ARE JUST A GEM . i know we only recently became friends but in that short amount of time we bonded by playing league for like 5 hours straight lmfao . thank you for feeling comfortable enough to ask me for advice and direction though . it means a lot to me more than you know !! also i am here to write yone and kai'sa mutually fangirling/fanboying over each other . that thread is so cute and i am excited to see where it goes . ALSO I'M A NOOB AT XIV SO YOU'VE BEEN WARNED . heck im just bad at all video games lmao . but i look forward to playing them with you !!!!

𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐓𝐑𝐈 𝐂𝐎𝐌𝐌𝐈𝐒𝐒𝐈𝐎𝐍 (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

i can't write about everyone , but i can sure as hell tag you all . please know that even if we haven't actively written it doesn't mean i don't want to . i still support you as a writer and creator and enjoy seeing you on my dash !! i have hopes that maybe we can write some day ! but i know we're all busy or overwhelmed with things outside of the rpc so there's obviously no rush . and if we have written or talked then please know that you have truly made my experience here something amazing . i was always a bit scared to come back to such a big fandom , but so many of you have welcomed me in writing ayaka and given me the opportunity to explore her more . so thank you <3

@zaihuos , @autymns , @wcvensouls , @enjomo , @todestochter , @yizao , @ungest , @raikuro , @tealsteel , @sourcewater , @dcndrohime , @rikyos , @nekasu , @meropidas , @scarletooyoroi , @viaetor , @abyssin , @crownlcsking , @raytm , @iedolon , @noctumsilenced , @noctuafought , @capravulpes , @liightbringr , @chiheru , @foliarlight , @mercyburned , @apocryphis , @anostos , @theoneandonii , @gonguji , @sinspast , @mellodiies , @pietys , @knghted , @dualisume , @artificeheart , @erabundus , @momijiba, @supportingfire , @cloudhymn , and honestly all of you .

[rabbitsrams]

angel — jschlatt x reader

based on the song "angel" by pinkpantheress

buckle up, she's angsty.

wc: 554

y/n's diary: dec. 9, 2023 ♡ schlatt's gonna take me out tomorrow. i'm really excited. it's been a while since we've seen each other. with his job and mine, it's been kind of hell. sure we've been texting and occasionally calling, but it's not the same. i miss his touch, i miss how his hands grip my fingers when they're cold. i miss him having his arm around me when we're on the railroad. he's just… everything to me. and i wish under better circumstanses we can see each other more. because no one is as romantic as him, i want you to know. he's my angel. —————————————————————————————————— y/n's diary: dec. 10, 2023 ♡ he flaked. —————————————————————————————————— y/n's diary: dec. 11, 2023 ♡ he hasn't texted me since saturday night. he can't check his phone, so he can't tell me he's okay. that's what i'm telling myself. he somehow can't get to the phone and that's why he flaked. why he left me waiting for him in the freezing cold. —————————————————————————————————— y/n's diary: dec. 24, 2023 ♡ my baby just went away. he's gone. i'm blocked everywhere. i don't understand. so now i'll have to spend christmas crying in my room alone. —————————————————————————————————— y/n's diary: dec. 27, 2023 ♡ my angel, you're what haunts me now that you're away. —————————————————————————————————— y/n's diary: oct. 2, 2024 ♡ dang. it's been a hot minute since i've opened this book. everyone's telling me that life is hard but it's a piece of cake. i'm doing just fine. or, at least i was. i haven't thought about schlatt since i threw this book into my closet. i haven't gotten any answers from him since that day, but i made peace with it. it's okay. he's just another L. i'm never gonna allow myself to fall in love again. —————————————————————————————————— y/n's diary: mar. 19, 2025 ♡ since this is my jSHIT diary, guess i'll update. i saw him today. just casually shopping like everything was normal. he had an arm around another girl. a girl who strangely looked like me. like i was easily replaceable. i wanted to cause a scene. i wanted to march up to them and scream till my lungs gave out before slapping him in the face. i really wanted to do that. but i didn't. he did catch my eye when i was leaving and he was still inside. that's all the closure i needed. i waited till i was home to scream. then i started writing in here. i'm fine. life's a piece of fucking cake. —————————————————————————————————— y/n's diary: mar. 20, 2025 ♡ he showed up at my apartment today. i should have slammed the door in his face as soon as i saw him. but instead i let him into my home. angel recognized him. she started thumping as soon as she saw him. that little bunny knew from the beginning that it was a bad idea. he did end up explaining why he flaked and ghosted me. it was honestly quite bullshit in my opinion but eh. oh well. it's been more than a year. it's over and has been. he can take his life and that girl and shove it. life's a piece of cake, after all.

[drarrily-we-row-along]

Valentine's Card

"Honestly," Draco huffed as he set what had to be the 45th card he'd picked up back on the shelf. "This is ridiculous," he grumbled as he reached for the next.

"Can I help you with anything, sir?" a boy who couldn't be more than 17 asked him.

He looked him up and down before gesturing to the selection of Valentine's Day cards, "these are appalling."

"Not a fan of Valentine's Day?" he asked, voice annoyingly sympathetic as if a child could understand the pressure of choosing a Valentine's card for your childhood nemesis, turned work-rival, turned acquaintance, turned best friend, turned (recently) lover.

Although, as it happened, he wasn't particularly fond of Valentine's Day. "Not especially," he conceded. "But these are all so-" he broke off, searching for the right word, "trite. Cute. They make everything seem like relationships are just rainbows and butterflies, and they aren't."

"Err," the teen said, scratching his neck. "Well, I think lots of folks just want to pretend for a day that things aren't awful."

"My relationship isn't awful!" he protested, because he certainly didn't want the teen to go away thinking that. "My relationship is wonderful. He's stubborn, and pig-headed, and too noble for his own good. He drives me mental some days with his inability to think about his own needs. But he's the bloody love of my life and I wouldn't want him any other way."

"Right," the teen replied uncertainly, glancing around for someone to help him. "I don't think I'm supposed to say this, seeing as selling cards is what we do," he said, "but I don't think you're going to find anything like that here."

And Draco couldn't help it, the frustration of trying to find the perfect card melted away and he set down the card in his hand. "You're right," he replied. "Time to try my hand at making something again."

When he got home, he sat down at his writing desk and started to work; he didn't have much time before Harry turned up for their dinner date.

He was putting the finishing touches on the card when he heard Harry tumble out of the floo. Draco blew off the last bit of glitter as Harry came in, bouquet of roses in his hands. "For you," he said, holding them out and leaning in for a kiss.

"For you," Draco replied, offering him the card. "The boy at the shop told me that they didn't have anything that would say what I was trying to say, so I made it myself."

"Babe," he said, grinning at him with the soppiest expression before opening it and reading it aloud,

"Dear Harry, your stubbornness is bested by only your love, your strength by only your kindness. You make me feel like a mess, still I must confess, I'm rather obsessed, with the man who so loves my weakness."

Draco felt himself flushing bright red, uncertain of how the other man would respond. Really, if he'd had more time to think about it, Draco was sure that he wouldn't have even given it to him. "This was stupid-" he started.

Even as Harry looked up at him, eyes shining, "You wrote this for me?" he asked, clutching it to his chest and covering himself in glitter.

"Yes?"

"I love it," he breathed, leaning in to kiss Draco, "This is the sweetest-" he cut himself off to kiss him again. "I love you," he said against his mouth. "All of you," he added, looking pointedly at the last line of the card.

Draco laughed, "I know. But it means the most to me that you love me when I feel like I can't be enough."

Harry kissed him again, and then again, "You're always enough."

"Dinner?" he asked, feeling overly pleased with himself.

Harry shook his head and backed him toward the bedroom, "Dinner can wait."

---------------------

Written for the @hdcandyheartsfest prompt 'Valentine's Card'

Read more of my 2023 hdcandyhearts ficlets here.

[alittledizzy]

I absolutely agree with you on all points regarding the ask about Dan and Phil building an audience back, what's holding them back, etc. When they both started posting a little more regularly again after their coming out videos, and seemed to be hinting at trying to post content again, I was excited. However, I can't say I wasn't disappointed in Dystopia Daily. It's like Dan mentally cannot break free of 2016 internet humor, right down to even his snarking, depreciating humor about his audience being outdated. Phil has gotten much better about being himself on-camera, but you can tell he's still keeping it at arms-lengths. Which is fine, he's certainly entitled to create a healthy barrier, but watching the two of them in 2023 is like trying to straighten a slightly crooked picture but just not quite being able to get it right. Just...off. I think the tours were supposed to be their "grand finale" and now they just want to settle back into how things were before, but don't know how to do that without drawing from what they're comfortable with. Which they haven't done regularly since 2016, so that's their comfort zone. They want things to work within their comfort zone, but that might not happen.

"watching the two of them in 2023 is like trying to straighten a slightly crooked picture but just not quite being able to get it right"

this is the best description of them i've seen in recent history.

it's also something you can compare to other content creators that are still going; most have shifted content away from sit down stare at the camera videos into something softer and more blurred into their life. zoe and alfie vlog, louise vlogs, tyler streams on twitch. they're all still content creation but they've understood that the time for persona heavy youtube creating has come and gone.

i don't think dan and phil could, would, or should vlog. they wouldn't enjoy that. i don't even want phil to stop making sit down videos if he's that attached to the format! but they need to find what is their own middle ground between the rigid division of their pre-coming out selves and finding comfort with an audience. i think youtube for phil feels safe right now but i do not think it is on any level creative or challenging for him. i said something similar before, but watch even his 'questions i wouldn't normally answer' video and tell me he's pushing even a single boundary in it.

and if he is honestly happy with them having made their bank and likely being able to live on the interest from investments and residuals for the rest of their lives, more power to them. i'm here because i love them as people. i will never stop following them with passion and interest.

"I think the tours were supposed to be their "grand finale" and now they just want to settle back into how things were before"

i think this is correct and also where it gets even stickier because they are out of touch. with younger audiences and the content they want. with no video platforms and what does well there. i think they understand the audience they cultivated years ago very well, for better or worse, but that's not going to get them forward momentum.

i think a podcast would be a great way for them to safely do that. but i think their perception of how the audience would react to joint content is skewed too. phil gets numbers on meme tweets but nothing short of dan dropping an hour and a half 'here's a timeline of my relationship with phil' is going to pull ten million views so they've surpassed the era where they need to fear about making major headlines anywhere. they whethered that storm and i'm happy for them, i'm just not convinced they realize that. since obviously to a singular person any amount of direct attention is going to feel like a Lot.

[epickiya722]

Hello, I'm new to the jujutsu fandom, I've already watched season 1 of the movie and I'm in season 2 of jujutsu, I also follow the jujutsu manga, I liked your tumblr and started following you, I like your analyzes and you make me understand more jujutsu, thank you. I have a question, don't you think Sukuna is a boring villain, sorry, but he's too annoying, even Mahito is more interesting than him and it's impressive that Mahito gave more weight to the work than Sukuna, Sukuna killed Gojo and his death It had no significance in the work, it's something terrible, I think the author got lost.

Hi back at you, Anon! I'm, too, new to the fandom myself. I was already interested in the anime when it first released and then read the manga, but it's only since the latter half of 2023 I became more active in the fandom.

I said it before, but it does still shock me to have people tell me they like my posts. Half of the time, I'm surprised folks understand them because I ramble in them since I write on whim. I do my best to be clear about what I'm saying though!

Thank you for that, glad you're enjoying them.

**

I don't think Sukuna is boring. He's actually my favorite villain to the story. And honestly, I don't think any of the JJK villains are boring.

Now for a second, I'm going into writer Kiya mode and without the bias of "Gege hates Gojo and favors Sukuna", like, throwing that outside for a second here.

Mahito definitely played his part well as a villain. He was a major problem in the first season and during the Shibuya Incident. And he did hold a lot more weight than Sukuna did in those arcs.

But on Gege's part, I think it was on purpose. I don't think Gege actually wanted to show Sukuna a lot, especially during the first half. Mahito and the other Disaster Curses, I think of them as obstacles that needed to get over first. They were the big bad villains during their time of the story until it was time for their parts to come to a close.

Had Gege put a lot of Sukuna in the first couple of arcs, it would have been too much going on. Imagine him randomly taking over Yuji's body to kill people while at the same time Yuji had to deal with Mahito.

Instead, Sukuna was more in the backseat and would often pop up to antagonize Yuji like an annoying sound in his ear while commentating about Megumi in his thoughts, that setting up for what he will later in the story.

Also, it wouldn't have made sense when Sukuna was regaining his strength. The Finger Bearer Curse, rethinking is now... I don't think that was just a display of what he can do. It felt more in setting up for how Yuji was going to change and Sukuna's plans for Megumi. Sukuna needed his fingers to get that power back.

Unlike the Disaster Curses who weren't tied to any objects. They could actively go about causing destruction while growing in strength, as we seen with Mahito during Shibuya.

Something told me that Mahito and the Disaster Curses weren't going to last in the story because how they were set up. But they did leave an impression on me.

With the Gojo's death, maybe Gege did get lost. I write, so I understand that feeling. (It also doesn't help that fandoms tend to not help at all with being how they are. You know, their judgments and harrassments putting pressure on the creators.)

People would say it has to do with Gege not liking Gojo, but again, factoring that out. What if it was supposed to feel disappointing?

I think about the reactions of how Toji died, who died similarly to how Gojo did. By the hands of "the strongest", standing up, wearing the tight black shirt and white pants combo, upper half gone and thinking about the people they care about.

Fans were disappointed Toji died because he was such a great character to have. When Gojo died, I saw the same thing.

Thinking about it, would it have made sense for Gojo to have killed Sukuna? When Yuji is still present, the actual protagonist?

Gojo's death, disappointing it is (I like Gojo), it may have been written to be the closing for his character (if he stays dead). Gojo was often the "tool" of jujutsu society. He was used to clear problems because he was the strongest. Him dying, it was almost as if the characters now had to get used to not having to rely on one person. It's why they discussed a plan beforehand to deal with Sukuna.

Sometimes, I feel like that what Gege aims for. Certain reactions to the audience and if we'll catch onto what is going on. Honestly, now that Gojo's death happened, it did feel like to me that Toji's death may have foreshadowed that. Coincidence or on purpose, I don't know.

Gege probably does want the audience to be annoyed with Sukuna. Gege wants us to be agitated not for a laugh, but to feel how Yuji and the others feel about him. Anytime Sukuna goes out his way to put down Yuji, I feel annoyed. I feel irritated.

It's how stories are written. It's how stories work. To get the audience to feel a certain way based on what's happening and the tone. I have seen people get mad that JJK is getting so dark and depressing. But one, it's always been that way. Two, it's not showcased as some slice of life comedy. This is the same story where a bullied kid dies.

How the fandom reacts reminds me of how the non-sorcerers are written. Their negative emotions cause problems for those who work to handle those problems. In real life, people will read JJK and not handle their emotions causing problems. Be it arguing with others or going as far as to violently threating the mangaka.

Over fiction.

People got so comfortable now with using KYS to things that they don't like, it's their immediate reaction. I just saw it yesterday with an artist I follow.

It's pathetic, it's sad, it's disgusting.

Ooh, I rambled a little off topic for a bit there, sorry about that.

That's all I really have to say for now!

[tleeaves]

The Fictional Crush Line-Up For 2023 and Beyond

Was going to do this sooner (as in a review on the year based on the new or resurfaced interests I picked up, with aforementioned fictional crushes along the way), but I wanted to collect art for them all too and then I also had to try and remember them all. But here we are. If I'm missing any, I'll either have to edit and or reblog to include them.

See if you can spot any common threads (it may get trickier as the list goes on, just be warned). This goes almost in chronological order. But order does not in any way reflect my level of brainrot and obsession with each.

SPOILERS AHEAD FOR THE FRAGILE THREADS OF POWER, BALDUR'S GATE III, AND ARCANE: LEAGUE OF LEGENDS (SPECIFICALLY REGARDING VIKTOR).

Consider yourself warned.

Victor Vale (Vicious by V.E. Schwab)

Victor and his revenge story are kind of responsible for kick-starting my journey of self-rediscovery these past twelve months, in a strange and roundabout way. He made me want to stick up for myself and what I wanted out of life. Sure, he's extremely morally grey in a concerning way, and yeah, we don't normally encourage revenge, but I found him a comfort at a difficult time. But also, I could totally fix him (no one can and it's no one's responsibility, yet the sentiment is still there). I'm not usually one for blonds (I am a liar) but his cold aesthetic is oddly pleasing. There's nothing I understand more than an awe that rots into resentment and envy while maintaining the same thread of fascination with someone. "Victor Vale was not a fucking sidekick" is just a, mwah, chef's kiss line. Honestly, I have less of a crush on this guy, more of an understanding that I appreciate. Also, I haven't even mentioned the chronic pain implications and canon uses of his powers. But that might be for another time.

Viktor (Arcane: League of Legends)

Another Viktor with chronic illness themes and whose (in LoL lore) regard for a partner in science goes sour over time as they pursue different objectives (not seen in the Netflix series yet, of course, it's too early for glorious evolution). This guy always comes back to rot in my brain, and I cannot wait for season 2 later this year to see what comes of his arc. I'm planning a fanfic involving him, Jayce, and maybe/sort of Jinx, based on a dream I had months ago but still have swirling in the soup that is my consciousness. There is something so pretty about this guy. If I was more confident in my sketching abilities, he'd end up being my muse way too often. Viktor's character to me is kind of a tragedy personified, and I love a good tragedy. Oh, and his voice actor?? Amazing. There's some debate over how authentic he sounds to Eastern Europeans, but the accent aside still, he sounds sooo good. I want to sit in on a lecture where he speaks about literally anything for two hours.

Kell Maresh (A Darker Shade of Magic; The Fragile Threads of Power by V.E. Schwab)

Usually, I don't talk about Kell because of how silly I feel like my crush on him is. I identify with Delilah "Lila" Bard throughout ADSOM and even Threads, so I hate further mentioning how much I actually think about Kell because I'd have to fist fight anyone who said I only relate to her because of Kell when that's not the truth. And yet, there's still enough differences between Lila and I for me to be like "if I had to pick a woman in the Schwabverse..." But also, MAYBE I JUST THINK KELL IS GORGEOUS, OKAY? 🫣 Maybe I like that he starts as a somewhat naive prince who's had things both easy and rough in life (wanting to be loved by the only family you know and not feel like you're only there to protect your adoptive brother whom your parents tried to tell you both was not actually your brother and you should stop treating each other as such is VALID, argue with the wall, also he's the bodyguard and eternal worrier (yes, worrying) for Rhy and he's taken lives way too young). Maybe I like that he fell first and fell hard for Lila (okay, but if we're getting into the nitty-gritty, she did flirt with him first multiple times, but she would never admit to actual feelings), that he's the male love interest without reservations for once, leaving it up to Lila and whether she's open to love for once in a story. And yeah, okay, maybe I like that he's actually some kind of a prince charming, the sort you always secretly dream about, you know? Shut up. I like his stupid magic coat too. He's clever, but occasionally actually unbelievably dumb, he's funny and witty yet he knows when to keep his mouth shut (and is usually the one hauling others out of a scrap because of their own smart mouths), he cares too much about his family, AND DID I MENTION HE ALSO HAS CHRONIC ILLNESS THEMES THAT BROKE MY DAMN CHRONICALLY ILL AND IN PAIN HEART? I've said too much already, but there. He's a guy.

Miguel O'Hara (Spider-Man: Across The SpiderVerse)

This is the one my sister teases me most about because she doesn't get it. To be honest with you all, even I don't know how to explain it. But this guy. Miguel. There is something about him that I just abdkjdjsdv, you know? Is it the tragedy? The moral greyness? The fangs? His insane height? Just his fanon self? The fucking muscles?? I don't know. But I will defend how interesting he is as an antagonist until the cows come home.

Elliott (Stardew Valley)

Oh... boy. Sometimes, I realise I have a type. It's pretty guys who are hopeless romantics that write novels and poetry. Maybe it's just this one guy. But wow, it works on me. I'm writing a fanfic about him because I need to. There's only 400-odd words to it so far. It was not long after I met him in the game that I decided I had to wife him up. I planted that pomegranate tree early, because it's his favourite fruit for those who don't know, and he loves receiving them as a gift. I got ducks so I could give him their stray feathers. I learned how and when to find lobsters and catch crabs because he loves those too. If I'm out of gifts, I go get a coffee for him because every writer needs their sustenance. Literally, by Spring of Year 2, we were married, and I wondered if perhaps I might have been a little too single-mindedly pursuing every one of those cut scenes when I should have been taking it a bit slower and making it less of a mission. Don't know what to tell you, I went crazy. I fully believe in the headcanon that he gets up early just to go through his haircare routine. Is he pretentious? Maybe. Does he lay it on a little too thick that he's scared of dying alone? Well, okay, yes. Does it bother me that as a househusband he doesn't help out more on the farm? Occasionally. But there's also no one else I'd rather be with (and I developed a sprinkler system specifically so there was less work for me anyway and so now I don't mind at all when he isn't helping). And I can't believe my sister ever introduced me to Stardew Valley because I am now mentally ill about a videogame character made of pixels. Yes, I make wine just for him too. Hush. I spoil him daily now that we're married. Our first child is a son named Ernest. I was debating between Ernest and Edgar, and honestly, I think I should have gone with the latter, but I chose the former. All the dialogue from Elliott is so frickin' cute.

Astarion Ancunín (Baldur's Gate III)

And do you know what the worst part about this one is? I still haven't actually played Baldur's Gate III. I know, I KNOW. A crime. I'm working on it. But you best believe I've watched every cutscene I can, every scrap of gameplay dialogue, all the choices, the different endings you can get with him (Ascended breaks my heart every time -- I don't care how hot he is, it's not what he would have wanted, he doesn't love you like he used to anymore, and he's not as happy as he could be), and I've listened to all the interviews with Neil Newbon and the writer for Astarion about him. This fruity traumatised vampire haunts me. I want to hold him gently and caress his face and tell him he's beautiful and what he looks like to me since he hasn't seen his reflection in centuries and I want to make sure he knows he's loved. I want him to bite me and drink my blood too, but that's not as important. Does it weird me out how much he reminds me of Prince Charming from the Shrek franchise and Preminger from Barbie: The Princess and the Pauper and then aesthetically Asra from The Arcana: A Mystic Romance? Yes. But Astarion's also his own character and I'm in love with his smile and goofy lines.

Settrigh "Sett" (Heartsteel; League of Legends)

This... might be the lowest point, actually 💀 My sister would agree. Because it's not enough to crush on book characters, show characters, and videogame characters -- while technically this guy is a videogame character and was part of League of Legends waaay before the music video, it was the PARANOIA music video that got me. So, even fictional characters made/involved in music videos are not safe from my heart. Because, as I understand it, OG Sett is a bit different from Heartsteel Sett, and I've found I usually prefer reading about the interpretation of the latter in fanfic more than the former. I mean, I still really, really enjoy fanfics where he's The Big Boss of the pits, and or his other background/lore is included, but I've read some where his old personality is a bit Yikes. The golden retriever energy is my favourite era of his if we can call it that (I still headcanon him as a part fox Vastayan, you can't convince me otherwise so go argue with someone else about it, not me). And honestly, I think I might have read more fics involving Sett in 2023 than I did any of the other characters on this list. Which is saying something since he's not as popular as a few of them. He's a pretty guy and I wish to bite him. Lovingly.

Mizu (Blue Eye Samurai)

Oh woman. Mizu is... is... she's basically my wife. I know she's all our wife, but like just let me dream a little here. As soon as I finished the series, I was opening up Tumblr, Pinterest, and AO3, my holy trinity of fandom. My platonic wife was sending me TikToks of our shared fictional wife. Mizu can wind up non-binary, male, female, I honestly do not mind because I am in love with any version she is/becomes (for now, I interpret her as a woman in disguise, but if that changes, I'll absolutely change how I refer to Mizu). She is a tragedy wrapped up in revenge because of a rotten love and unfortunate parentage and time period. I want her as much as I want to be her. Also? I go insane over her little smiles and smirks. I LOVE when we got to hear her laugh, even if it was mostly the flashbacks (do not mention Mikio near me; if he wasn't already dead, I would kill him). Also, who doesn't hate their British/white half, ahaha, oh my god, I know mixed ethnicity is a hot topic for people who do not want POC whitewashed in media, and I fully understand that, but I do appreciate seeing parts of myself in mixed characters like the conflict between trying to be more like one side than another. I'll also admit it: she does indeed look hot covered in blood and carrying a sword. I'll see myself out the door. I've been wanting to write a fanfic about her but I'm still stewing over ideas. Mizu is also probably my first truly major crush on a fictional woman (other than my childhood crush on Helga Sinclair from Atlantis: The Lost Empire). Vi from Arcane comes pretty close, but I see too much of myself in her that it gets weird.

We'll do some honourable mentions for characters from The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim since I've gotten into that again.

Brynjolf, Hadvar, and Nazir, I wish I could mod my gameplay so I could marry you. The developers hated their men-loving gamers (I know the women-lovers complain about Serana, but she will never be as heartbreaking as Brynjolf, I don't care if she recognises proposals only to decline them). I mean, Brynjolf is the Tamriel equivalent of Scottish, he calls you "lass/lad", has got a smoothass voice, supports you through so much of the Thieves Guild questline, has a wicked sense of humour, and then when you finish the questline, it's all "sorry, lass. Got important things to do. We'll speak another time" 😭 You can't even recruit him as a follower. He says nothing when you wear an amulet of Mara. I play on a fucking PS4, I can't do mods to marry him or get more dialogue.

(By the way, on my most recent playthrough, Lydia died when I fought the troll on the seven thousand steps, and I am still mad about it. It used to be difficult for Lydia to die, that was why I brought her everywhere, and now I have to become Batman "I work alone". ESPECIALLY after Benor then died on the way up to Paarthurnax. I still can't believe that happened, I should have told him to stay behind and wait for my return.)

Also, every time I play, Derkeethus is so bugged, I can't even rescue him let alone marry the guy, which was disappointing because he seemed nice.

Argis the Bulwark, Vilkas, Farkas, Rayya, Aela the Huntress, and Marcurio, you are all marriageable and live in my heart always. Marcurio was the first I ever married, I think. Three guesses why I chose him (it's the sarcasm, wisecracks, and general sense of humour) (maybe the long hair too). Has anyone noticed how there doesn't seem to be marriageable options among the Khajiit characters?? Why do you think that is? I just checked the Skyrim marriage wiki and this is what it has to say in the trivia: 'There are no Khajiit spouses, however; since the majority of Khajiit in Skyrim are traders or travelers from Elsweyr, they probably have families back home. Additionally, Khajiit characters talk about home a lot, stating how much they miss it and how cold Skyrim is; thus, they probably do not want to marry and settle down in Skyrim.'

Heart-breaking. Oh well.

And that's the end of the line-up. If you read through this, Divines bless your goddamn soul. Psycho-analyse me based on them, I dare you. Or just judge me. I'd like to see either. And if you can find something in common about them all (you don't need to consider the honourable Skyrim mentions), please let me know, because I am personally at a loss.

[nayeonline]

Ari's K-Pop Roundup: April 2024 (NewJeans, IVE, RIIZE, KISS OF LIFE, ARTMS, LOOSSEMBLE, BABYMONSTER + MORE)

check out last months installment here :)

Bubble Gum - NewJeans

With HYBE collapsing in on itself and ADOR being the epicentre of the explosion, a part of me was a little afraid that NewJeans' comeback would take a hit in the quality department. From the first bars of 'Bubblegum' I knew I had been worried for no reason.

'Bubblegum' is an early 2000s synth fueled record with an edge of 80s Japanese citypop. It's groovy, simplistic, and effortless in execution, and while it isn't necessarily an innovation in NewJeans' notoriously trend-setting discography, it's still a welcome addition that capitalizes on the members vocal tones and the group's style beautifully.

The music video is gorgeous, as usual, with it taking notes from the raw, realistic nature of 'Ditto' and the colour-pop confidence of 'Hype Boy'. Danielle looked especially gorgeous in her natural curls, and Hanni's sharp bob is so striking - she looks like an anime heroine, and I love it.

I know we've all heard the phrase 'I think I just made the song of the summer' a little too much these past few years, but I am of the opinion that NewJeans has successfully achieved it with 'Bubblegum' - it's been a whirlwind year so far for me, and something easygoing and chill like this is exactly the energy I will be bringing into the hotter months.

Even though they have made ripples in the kpop industry, it seems nobody can do it quite like NewJeans.

해야 (HEYA) - IVE (IVE SWITCH)

note: i will be covering the rest of the mini album when the m/v for 'accendio' is released next month, so stay tuned :)

Coming off of the mildly contrived 'Baddie' and the shockingly beautiful 'Off The Record' from 2023's 'I'VE MINE' EP, I wasn't sure where I was going to stand with IVE's comeback. Once again, I was pleasantly surprised.

'Heya' is a track with a chorus melody that makes such perfect sense that you are left amazed that nobody has thought of it before - its so easily catchy, and being 100% real, it's been stuck in my head since the m/v teaser. The construction of this song is honestly very impressive (Dem Jointz is the arranger so this is unsurprising), every vocal or instrumental motif pokes it's head in and reappears in an effortlessly perfect way, even the raps aren't jarring, a pitfall many a kpop track have fallen down before.

Functionally, this song is the perfect response to 'Baddie': that playful edge they centred in on in that track is still present here, but IVE have returned back to home base a little more and drawn from that elegant, untouchable concept they built in their iconic debut trilogy. 'Heya' understands the elements that saved 'Baddie' from succumbing to unlistenability, and knows how to use them redirect back to the right track without discarding the lessons learnt entirely.

While I don't think this song has reached 'After LIKE' or 'Love Dive' levels of perfection for me, it's still a super fun song for IVE, and absolutely a step in the right direction.

(final note: does anyone else feel like this song samples 'flashing lights' by kanye west?? does anyone else hear this? like at 45 seconds?? maybe im slowly going insane idk)

Midas Touch - KISS OF LIFE

(check out my breakdown of the historical allusions in the mv here)

Kiss Of Life seems to just know exactly what they are doing, and the music is just getting better and better. The Britney edge and old SNSD flair on this track is right up my street, and all the members just give their all on this song, their talent is so consistently clear.

Their seemingly exponential growth in popularity and success from debut is so well deserved, they are truly setting the standard for the quality of music of the 5th generation; they are proving with every release that kpop does have more to offer, there is more innovation to be made.

My grievances at this release being a single album aside, this was a perfect comeback in my opinion. Congratulations Kiof for graduating nugudom, I can't wait to see what you do next.

Impossible + 9 Days + One Kiss - RIIZE

And just when I thought I would never enjoy a boy group release again, RIIZE dropped 'Impossible'. The audacity to release something as fucking amazing as this like 3 months after 'Love 119' (which i controversially loved)??? Insane.

This track marks SM's latest edition to their arsenal of iconic house bangers, 'Impossible' revitalizes everything that made Shinee's 'View' and f(x)'s '4 Walls' so good for the 2024 music scene. It has that late night BBC Radio 1/love island pop edge to it that I have been yapping about for months, and I am so obsessed. This is how to compete with Somi's 'Fast Forward' for the most british sounding kpop song.

'One Kiss' is a sonic sequel to 'Love 119' - I am just so obsessed with how much they sound like an early 2000s western boy group on tracks like this, they just exude NSYNC energy. '9 Days' is another laidback pop hit, with a little more energy and longevity than 'One Kiss'. The sound of 2024's summer in kpop has clearly been established, and I for one am in favour.

RIIZE being the first boy group to last more than two comebacks on my stan list is really something I didn't see coming, but it's a welcome change.

SHEESH - BABYMONSTER (BABYMONS7ER)

I think babymonster may start to be delegated to the mini review section of these monthly reviews, because I am genuinely struggling to find something likeable within this song. 'Batter Up' at least had a danceability to it, even if it was highly derivative, but 'Sheesh' is just so predictable to me. Even the switch up from the standard YG party final chorus felt formulaic somehow, and the mini album wasn't much better.

Ahyeon is back though, and she proved once and for all that she is absolutely a necessary part of the group - her rap was easily the song's highlight. The performances from this era were genuinely excellent considering what they were working with.

I don't like being a stuck record with groups I just will never enjoy, so I apologize, but discussions around their future releases will be limited going forward, unless they drop something that I actually enjoy.

Pre2: Flower Rhythm + Pre3: Candy Crush- ARTMS (Dall)

There is something about modhaus production that just works for me, and the interpolation of Heejin's 'Algorithm' on 'Flower Rhythm' is a really exciting choice. The verses, post-chorus and bridge are very strong in my opinion, but the chorus itself seems to get a little lost in the sauce. I can see that chorus growing on me however, and the rest of the song is highly enjoyable, very evocative of the yyxy sub-unit.

Haseul's 'Plastic Candy' is one of my favourites from the ARTMS girls' releases, and with it's interpolation in 'Candy Crush' means I am predisposed to be obsessed with this song. It's a little jazzy, a little citypop, and it's the perfect late night summer vibe. This is easily my favourite of the pre releases so far, but the sheer array of styles the girls have demonstrated makes me very excited to see where they go for the title track.

Girls' Night - Loossemble (One Of A Kind)

LOOSEMBLE AND ARTMS RELEASES IN ONE MONTH??? WE WON

Loossemble's 'Sensitive' was pure pop perfection, and the album was just as impressive, so going into 'One Of A Kind' and its title 'Girls' Night' I just knew they were going to deliver.

'Girls' Night' is a classic LOONA type track, a total kaleidoscope of sonic innovation, and it stuns throughout its 3:24 runtime (we love long songs). My girl Yeojin got PINK HAIR, Vivi got a lore update, and Gowon unlocked her irish ancestry - overall a 10/10 in the visuals department. The rest of the album is an actual masterpiece; 'Moonlight' is a banger that caught me off guard by how good it is, 'Boomerang' has an addictive almost hyperpop edge - it's very evocative of Yeppi Yeppi by aespa, or even Paradisin' by Rina Sawayama. 'He Said I Said' plays it a little too safe in the production department in my opinion, and it comes off a slightly childish for them - it's a perfectly enjoyable song, but probably the weakest on the album. 'Truman Show' brings in a more acoustic sound, which builds with the synth to create a truly cinematic feel - it has a ballad vibe, but keeps it on the upbeat side, so if kpop ballads aren't your thing, you still might enjoy this one. 'Starlight' is a perfect album closer, and although it will never be my favourite LOONA song with 'Star' in the title, it's a really beautiful song. This was a really successful album for them, and I can't wait to see what else they bring to the industry.

MINI REVIEWS:

SPOT! - ZICO feat. JENNIE: I was fully prepared to lie and act like this was a masterpiece before I listened because it has my queen jennie in it, but when I actually heard it I was pleasantly surprised with an absolute certified banger. This has that TripleH - 365 Fresh energy that I love, and Jennie's amazing vocals have made me so excited for what shes going to do with her solo work at odd atelier :)

Could It Be + Freak - YUQI ((G)-IDLE): I've never been a huge (G)-IDLE fan, so 'Freak' really wasn't my vibe, but 'Could It Be' had a Sunmi-esque edge that draws me in somehow. Having heard a snippet on TikTok, I also listened to the b-side 'Red Rover', and it's a real standout, make sure to give this one a listen if you only heard 'Freak'.

Blush - woo!ah!: i am in denial thay the official group name is now WOOAH, why are we erasing herstory?? Anyway, 'Blush' really blew me away - this song is so fun, every second is packed with memorable melodies and beautiful production, and that post chorus??? a killer!! SO underrated, if you haven't checked out this song yet this month, be sure to, it's an underrated song that I can see making it high in my yearly ranking.

고민중독 - QWER: Sapphic themes?? in a kpop music video??? with a girl BAND??? yoasobi vibes??? of course i was going to love it! I had never really heard of QWER before this month, but this song is such a banger and the pop rock sound is immaculate - ( @a-moth-to-the-light this feels very much up your street) I will 100% be checking out their discography, and I can easily see these girls making a home on my stan list, this track is truly amazing.

Final Love Song - I-LAND2 Contestants with ROSÉ: This is the kind of kpop song that makes me understand why this genre is so bullied. What are we doing. Rosé sounded good I guess. Moving on.

IMMM - ILY:1: Such an unexpected groovy sound - big Momoland energy. Pretty much everyone is eating up these April releases, even the nugu girlies are bringing it more than usual. I'm slightly worried about the lack of music video or promotions, but this song is really fun, so please go stream and show ILY:1 some love :)

[loserley]

A lovers' quarrel

pair: alhaitham x gn! reader

warnings: mentions of alcohol, a bit angstyy

note: first genshin fic ldjsjsjs :')

"Ugh fine!" you shouted, walking out the door. you and your boyfriend may or may not have had another fight, again.

funny thing is it's always over the most simplest things! like, washing the dishes, fixing the bed, cleaning the tables, and so on.

but this time it wasn't one of those arguments, alhaitham had been going home from work very late. half the time, you're always asleep whenever he comes home. you understand that work is important, but that's when he said, "work is more important okay? i can't provide us food, or this house if i don't work!" hearing that made your blood boil. that's literally saying "i pick work over you" and that's insane!

you also had work, but alhaitham's pay more than yours. you earn atleast 5-6k which is actually enough money to pay for rent, while alhaitham earns 90-200k which was honestly not shocking.

a few hours later you still hadn't come home, you were at tighnari and cyno's place ranting about alhaitham. they weren't really surprised, at all. you'd always come to visit them everytime you two had a quarrel, it was serious this time although. tighnari was comforting you as you try not to cry, you were overthinking things like alhaitham leaving you for work or he found someone better at his office. and cyno, he's just, there. at first he says a bunch of shitty things to alhaitham and when you started crying, he's just there for emotional support now.

an hour later a knock from tighnari and cyno's apartment was heard. you guessed it, it was kaveh. he doesn't really do anything besides bringing alcoholic drinks such as soju, beer, and some other stuff. you drink but alhaitham says you can't, you were not strong when it comes to alcoholic drinks, probably a glass of 2 or 2 shots makes you drunk already.

30 minutes later as you were out on the floor passed out, a knock was heard, again. this time it was alhaitham who had come to pick you up. cyno disagreed, cyno tried to argue with tighnari since it wasn't their relationship to fix, it was yours and alhaitham's. your boyfriend carried you to the car, putting you in the backseat so you can lay down.

when you two reached home alhaitham picked you up, carried you to your shared bedroom. "stupid alhaithammmm how dare he pick his hic work over me..." you whined, alhaitham chuckles a bit but a smile turns into a frown. "i'm sorry, love" he says patting you on the head as you fall asleep.

the next morning, you woke up hearing noises from the kitchen, a delicious aroma coming from it. alhaitham was cooking breakfast, you remained silent when you sat up. "look, i, i'm sorry for all the things i said yesterday. i didn't mean to upset you. i just want what's best for us two, okay? i'm sorry, forgive me, love." haitham says looking in your eyes placing the dishes in the table, "you don't have someone else at work.. right?..." you say looking down with your hands in your lap. "what? no. i'm not cheating on you, okay?" "okay.. i love you." you say looking back at him, alhaitham chuckles "i love you too, now go eat. by the way, drink this for your hangover."

© loserley, 2023. Do not copy, translate, post my work on other social platforms.