#I hope anyone younger than me parent or child gets to see that

[mejomonster]

You know what else? Alex used the word queer in his fucking speeches. <3 the movie writing made a fucking choice and the choice was to be inclusive in that regard and I appreciate it

[fangirl-dot-com]

Reader Lore - Born to Break Records

So this is a little filler for between now and the next chapter. This chapter might have triggers for death, abusive parents, and brief mentions of bullying. If these make you uncomfortable, then please feel free to skip this chapter. The synopsis is the reader’s life up until her first race win in F2. 

Welcome to Reader-Lore

2003

The cry of a baby filled the sterile walls of the delivery room. Pants filled in the quiet moments, but were mostly covered. The wailing baby was placed into the arms of the waiting mother, the father looking down on the two. 

“It’s a girl,” the nurse told them, writing something down in a book. 

The atmosphere suddenly changed. The once hopeful air was dampened with disappointment. The father sighed loudly, turning his head to look out the window. The mother, who had held her baby tight, loosened her grip. Her nose was now scrunched in borderline disgust. 

The nurse, feeling the off energy, offered to take the baby girl. She made some excuse about needing to weigh her and make sure that she was healthy, things that could have waited until after the parents bonded. 

The mother was quick to hand her over, waiving her hand as though it wasn’t a big deal. The father had now moved farther away from the hospital bed. 

The baby had started to wail once more after being taken from the arms of her mother. Arms that she thought were safe. Arms connected to the body that had cared for her for 9 months. Arms that suddenly did not hold her tight. Arms that willingly gave her away to some stranger. 

Once the nurse and frightened infant left the from, the mother and father looked at each other. 

“I wanted a boy,” the male murmured.

The female rolled her eyes, “I know. And so did I. But we don’t have a choice anymore.” 

“We do. Could always leave her here. A boy would be able to break records. A girl is useless.” 

“And be arrested? No thank you.” The mother rolled on her side, arms around her front. The father just huffed. 

“Everything we talked about, our future, is now a wasted memory.” 

The mother looked at the door with a sliver of hope, although, it was too small for anyone to see it. “Maybe she can do everything that you wanted a boy to do.” 

“We can just have another baby,” the father persisted. 

“You heard the doctor. It would be too dangerous for me to have another. What’s done is done. You can walk out now if you can’t commit.” The woman went to say something else, but was interrupted by whimpers. 

The nurse had walked back in, now with a swaddled baby. Begrudgingly, the mother held her hands out to take the bundle of blankets. She looked down at the brand new baby, but her heart didn’t swell with pride like she read about. Her heart filled with distain, as if the baby were a Christmas present that she didn't want. But this time, she couldn’t return the baby like she’d return a gift at whatever store it was bought from. 

The father had taken a few steps closer to the bed, but kept his distance. There wasn’t a bone in his body that actually wanted the child. 

“We still need a name for her,” the nurse stated, clicking her pen. 

The mother glanced to the father before saying, “Y/n. Her name is Y/n.” 

2008 – Five years old 

The air was stuffy, filled with the scent of petrol and burnt rubber. The quiet that could have been was broken by the rattles of engines and throttles. You wished for silence. 

You wanted nothing to do with this. But, you’d rather get in a kart then flinch at your father’s hand. You had been allowed to wander around the track. The big boys were driving now. And by big boys, you meant 11- and 10-year-olds. They were bigger than you and drove karts that were so much faster than the little one that you had. 

You looked around. There was definitely not a shortage of girls hanging around, but none were dressed like you. Most were the older or younger sisters of the drivers. Their pink tops, paired with shorts or skirts, flowed in the wind. None of them were wearing an old itchy race suit that was two sized too big. They were allowed to wear sandals, while you had to endure the tight racing shoes that your dad had definitely yanked on the laces too much. It wasn’t your fault that you hadn’t learn to tie them yet. 

You watched their hair bounce in the tall pony tails tied on the tops of their heads. They didn’t need their hair to be wrapped in a bun at the base of their necks so that it could fit into a helmet. 

You wished that your mom and dad would allow you to cut it off so that you could be the boy that they wanted. You knew that they didn’t want you, your little mind was able to catch on to things like that. 

You understood patterns. Patterns on the track helped you know what areas to avoid. Patters on the kart taught you where to put your feet and hands. Patterns told you that moms and dads should be happy for their children, and not yell at them. Patters revealed that children did not flinch when their parents patted their heads or caressed their cheeks. 

The wind blew loud as the kart race came to a close. You knew that you needed to get back quickly to where you parents were waiting, but you wanted to see the winners, wanted to see them taste a victory that you were so desperate for. 

You squeezed past the other boys and looked up at the three on the podium. The one on the lowest step wasn’t rememberable. His hair looked the same as others. His height wasn’t tall or small, just in the middle. 

But the boys on the other two steps were. The one on the second pedestal had a shaggy hair cut, with bangs that pointed down. You had seen him before, surrounded by his family. A little brother, a big brother, mom and dad, and then a man who looked at the boy with stars in his eyes. 

You wished someone looked at you like that. 

“And in second place, Charles Leclerc.” So that was his name. Sharl. His eyes were bright green and filled with light and hope. But a sadness still glazed them as he looked up at the boy on the top step. 

The boy who towered over the crowd had blond sandy hair. For a winner, he didn’t look happy. His blue eyes didn’t hold the same brightness that the green eyes had. 

“And our winner, Max Verstappen!” 

That was a nice name. Max. You wanted to look at the boy winner for a few more moments. Engrave his image into your mind. Because, you didn’t know when the next time you’d be able to do this. Your dad would probably ban you from such things, saying something like you didn’t need to look at something you’d never achieve.

But you were hungry. 

You were taken out of your watching by the announcement that your own race was going to start soon. And you weren’t in your kart. 

You rushed through the crowd, trying to put on your bright pink helmet on. You could put your gloves on while you got into your kart. 

By the time you got there, your dad was already looking at you with a disappointed look. Your mother was nowhere to be found. 

“Where have you been,” he hissed, hitting your helmet. 

“I wanted to see the podiums,” you muttered, getting your gloves on. 

Your dad shook his head. “What have I told you about that?” 

“That I shouldn’t look at things that I can’t get.” 

“Exactly. Now get in your kart.” 

You did as he said. You heart was pounding as you taxied the little thing onto the smaller track. You were able to be seen by everyone, your helmet acting as a little flag. It seemed to say “look at me! I’m the only girl trying to be on par with all these boys! Watch me fail!” 

But you were determined to prove them all wrong. 

By the last lap, you were right behind one more kart. One more pass and you could win. Prove your dad wrong. Prove everyone wrong. 

You watched as he broke your pattern. The pattern that would help you win. 

He made a mistake, and you welcomed it with glee. 

You passed over the finish line with a significant gap behind you and that boy. At the stopping point, you parked your kart and stepped out, exhaling sharply. 

You thought that people would cheer and shout, but the silence that you had wished for earlier had come to haunt you. 

You won and there was nothing to celebrate. 

2015 – Twelve years old 

Everyone thought he was crazy. There was no way that he was going to sponsor a 12 year old in karting, a female none the less. 

He wasn’t crazy. How could he not want to sponsor you, a consecutive race winner in your league. He constantly watched you drive circles around the boys who would berate you in their free time. He watched as you would let their words roll right off your back. You didn’t let their words get to you.

But, he was your godfather and he had a sense of responsibility for you. He watched as you climbed out of the kart, looking around trying to find a familiar face. 

He could see your eyebrows raise through the visor when you caught sight of him. 

“LoLo!” you yelled, quickly sprinting over to him. He was ready to catch you, but not expecting the hit with your helmet. 

He let out an oof as you knocked him slightly off balance. 

“Hey kid! You did good!” He rubbed your helmet as if it were hair. You quickly unbuckled the pink contraption and took it off, hair sticking to your forehead. 

You looked around before your shoulders slumped. You kicked a rock as you spoke, “They didn’t come.” 

Lorenzo had noticed a lack of your parents as soon as he arrived. He would have come earlier to help you with your kart if he had known that they weren’t here. He looked down at you with sad eyes, and that’s the last thing you wanted. 

You always wished for someone to look at you with so much love and affection that it poured out of their soul. But you only ever got looks of hatred and pity. 

He rubbed your shoulder, “It’s ok kid. But you wanna know something?” He crouched down to your level, pant legs getting damp with moisture. You nodded your head. “LoLo gets to sponsor you!” 

You gasped, eyes tearing. Even though you were twelve, you knew the weight of the situation. Your parents had told you that because you were winning, you were embarrassing them. And because you were embarrassing them, they wouldn’t pay any more years of karting after this one. You wailed when you told Lorenzo the next time you saw him. And he saw your heart break into itty bitty pieces while you did. 

When you left, he looked into every possibly way that he could keep you in karting. The only option was to sponsor you.

And sponsor you he did. He emailed, texted, and called multiple companies, trying to get their support. He would get sponsorship to put on your kart so that you could carry the logos proudly. He had your new one sitting in the back of his old truck, but that was a surprise. It was blue with two proud bulls on the very front. He had done it. He found you a sponsor that would keep you going for a couple of years. 

His thoughts were interrupted by you actually knocking him over. He knew his sweater was getting damp, but he didn’t care. He just wanted to see you smile for the rest of his life. 

You were too busy whispering thank you after thank you for you to notice the weird looks that you were getting. Looks from the boys that you had just beaten. Looks from the parents who didn’t know the worries of paying for karting. 

He quickly picked you up and took you back over to get your cart. He helped you load it on the mover and rolled it over to his truck. You wouldn’t be needing this kart that was almost falling apart. You had a new one, and you’d be all right. 

You talked the whole way home, animatedly moving your hands around as you described your latest win. Your hands rolled over the other as you showed him how you turned the wheel, barely clipping the front of the kart who wanted to push you off. 

Lorenzo only looked at you with pure adoration. A look that you wanted so much, but were too busy to see due to your explanations of your imaginations. 

Maybe he was crazy, but he didn’t think so. 

2019 – Sixteen years old (F3)

Your eyes were pricked with tears as you read the letter you received in the mail. The big letters of DISOWNMENT flashed in the reflections. They had done it weeks ago, according to the date on the top of the paper. By now, your things were probably thrown away or burned.   

You had just finished the F4 category and were making a name for yourself in F3. You couldn’t deal with this now. One of the management people came and knocked on your door, telling you that the race was about to start. 

You crumpled the paper up and threw it in the trash. If they didn’t need you, you didn’t need them. That was the lie you continually told yourself. Of course a girl needed her parents. They were the people who were supposed to nurture you and help you. 

But they never did that in the first place. At least you didn’t have to constantly buy drug store foundation and concealer and try to explain the black and blue around your eyes after it melted off during the race. No more flinching. No more hiding. 

Just no more. 

You would call Lorenzo and see if you could stay with him for a bit during the break. You would have to or you wouldn’t have a place to sleep. 

Your breath shuddered at the thought. 

You told yourself that you knew this was coming. They had cut all contact with you months ago and weren’t spotted when you went home during the last break. 

You allowed the tears to fall as you got your helmet on. No one would see the streams as you placed your visor down. You were now hidden away from the weird looks that everyone sent you. No girl had ever made it this far. 

Sure as you grew, there were girls in karting. That number seemed to increase in F4. Most of them were from the driver academies. You were still able to participate due to multiple sponsorships that Lorenzo had gotten you. 

But with increase, there has to be a decrease. You were currently the only female in F3 and were set to be the only female to make it to F2. Well, that’s what everyone told you. Your stats reflected your need to prove yourself. 

Race win after race win helped thrust you through the blockades built by men. They wouldn’t stop you, and you didn’t want to stop. Not now, not ever. 

Each race win fueled your hunger in this world. And it only grew and grew. 

Your tears were brushed away by the wind brushing through your car. At that moment, you told yourself that you wouldn’t cry over your parents ever again. They didn’t deserve them. 

You could cry about other things. Such as passing over the finish line, marking your first win in F3. 

You constantly showed the world that you could do it. You wanted to cry again as you listened to your anthem. You wanted to cry when the boys celebrated with each other, leaving you out. You wanted to cry as you walked back to your “motor home,” knowing that it was put up quickly for you. 

The time you finally let yourself cry was when you were talking with Lorenzo on the phone. Your eyes were tired and dehydrated by the time you quit. Lorenzo was able to calm you down. He told you that he would take care of everything, take care of you. 

You knew you wouldn’t be able to see him much though. The F3 calendar was far busier than the F4 one had. And you knew the moment you entered F2, time for relaxation would be far and few between. 

But you had Lorenzo to fall back on when the times got hard. You could always count on him. 

2020 – Seventeen years old (F2)

It was too soon. Too too soon. It wasn’t fair either. Your tears had not stopped streaming down your face since you arrived. The sterile smell itched your nose, but you needed to be here. For him. 

He had gotten paler in the few moments since you had been there. His breath rattled with each inhale and exhale. And each breath brought more tears. You didn’t want to let him go. 

“Please LoLo. I can’t do this without you,” you whispered, knowing that he probably would not hear you. The doctors told you that he was far too gone for that, but you liked to believe that he was still listening. “You can’t leave me like everyone has. I can’t be alone. I need you.” You put your face down in the blankets, squeezing his hand. 

The nurses stood in the door, with tears of their own. They were watching a child lose the only family that she had left. 

You inhaled sharply, wiping your tears away.

“You know I’m going to do it. For you. It’s only ever been you. You’ve been my best friend and I don’t know how I’m going to get through this scary world without you.” You hiccupped. “But, I know that you need to go. And I’m being selfish for keeping you here.” 

You stood and kissed his forehead. 

“Thank you LoLo, for everything. I love you.” 

His chest rose, fell, rose, and fell. 

But didn’t rise again. The multiple beeps from the different machines let you know that he was gone. And he wasn’t coming back. 

One of the nurses came and rubbed your back as you sobbed, not caring who heard you. Your tears did not stop. 

They didn’t stop on the plane to Bahrain. They refused to dry up during the practices as you set record times. They let up as you gave post-practice interviews, saving you from being embarrassed. 

You cried as you put your helmet on. Stickers had been placed on it the night before with Lorenzo’s name and dates of birth and death to commemorate his legacy that would continue through you. 

You knew this race was important. You heard that multiple F1 drivers were there to watch. And you’d give them a spectacle, before hiding away to burry your dead godfather. You hoped that the blond kid with blue eyes that had grown up by now was there. He didn’t need to know that you looked up to him. You just hoped that he’d be there. And possibly the green eyed Justin Bieber look-a-like as well, you had followed him too. 

You had managed to score a P5 starting on the grid and you knew it would be tough to fight for the front. But you had a feeling that you’d be just fine. 

And just fine you were. 

You all hauled your F2 car over that finish line, finishing with a gap of 10 seconds. Your crew was screaming in your ear through the radio and congratulations were being thrown everywhere. You pulled into the number 1 spot and climbed onto the nose. You put your finger on the big numbers on the nose of your car, kissed the finger that touched it, and raised it, pointing at the sky. You had changed your driver number to the permanent 89 this season, and for the rest of your career. 

One time, Lorenzo had showed you pictures of when he used to kart. The big 89 was visible through the old photographs. He had trophies upon trophies, but was never picked up by anyone. You told him that if he had raced these days, he’d be able to skip everything and would be put into an F1 car immediately. He had just laughed and told you to do it for him. 

So that’s what you were doing. After you commemoration, you scrambled down the car and jumped into the crews waiting arms. These days, you did not flinch when they hit your helmet. You knew that these were celebrations for racers and you were thankful to partake. Two boys followed you up and went before you. You didn’t remember their names, only the Australian accent and the odd American accent. But they would remember your name. 

You carried your flag high as you walked onto the stage. The anthem sounded much sweeter this time around. The trophy felt a little heavier this time though. You looked up to see those blue eyes that you saw many years ago. Max said a quick congratulations before you raised it as though to almost offer it to the open sky. This time, you let the tears go. You quicky wiped them away and picked up the giant bottle of champagne. You hauled it over your shoulder and sprayed the others, absolutely drenching them. 

This time, they did it to you as well.  

You knew you made it. 

I’ll do it for you, LoLo. 

December 2024 – Twenty-one years old 

Christian Horner sat in the folding chair, as he did year after year. A camera was right in front of him, with an interviewer to the side. 

“Please state your name for the camera.” He rolled his eyes. 

“My name is Christian Horner, and I am the Team Principal of the Oracle Red Bull Racing Formula 1 Team.” 

“Let’s talk about your driver, Y/n L/n.” 

The screen cuts to the pace of your car, passing multiple others in one clean sweep. 

“She’s one of the best talents I’ve seen in a while.” 

A scene of you holding a trophy, high in the sky. 

“What is one thing that you admire about your driver. She has said a lot about you.” Christian smiled. Of course you had. You told him that you saw him as the dad you never had. 

“Almost everything she touches, she turns it to gold.” 

The scene changes to your first win. The crowds of red cheered your name. Something you didn’t think was possible. You had taken that win from their favorites and you were being praised for it. Slow-motion splashes of champagne hit you from either side as you wiped your face. 

The scene returns, but Max is in Christian’s spot. 

“She’s different. She’s the epitome of what a rookie should be. I’m just thankful that she’s my teammate and not working against me.” 

The screen fades to two Red Bull cars with an Aston Martin in between them. 

“Y/n, Max is currently behind the Aston. Gap to you is 1.237 seconds,” Mitch’s voice is heard off screen through the radio. 

“Tell Maxie that it’s time to do the old switcharoo!” 

Your car suddenly slowed down just enough on the turn, and the crowd cheered as Max’s car went wide, putting him before you. You quickly got in his slip stream and the two of you sped off, leaving the green car in the dust. 

Another driver, with green eyes, is now in the seat, answering the same question. 

Charles looked up in thought while blowing some air out his lips. “She’s fearless. You normally don’t see that anywhere. Sure, everyone gets scared if they have an impact, especially as big as the one she had, but not her.” 

The camera cuts to the violent scene of your first DNF. Your car flipped, you were trapped. People’s faces were adorned with tears including Christian, no one had been able to contact you. Yet, the focus is now on you, wiggling out from beneath the wreckage. You, in spite of it all, raised your fist as though you were celebrating a first win. 

The scene cuts to an Australian with a straight smile. He looks semi-uncomfortable in the seat.  

“It looked like you and L/n had a tussle in the beginning. Is that true?” 

Oscar shook his head. “There was never a tussle. We both made mistakes, but that’s racing. Wheels touch all the time: it doesn’t mean that we have the urge to take each other out.” 

The interviewer continued, “But she did take you out.” 

The screen fades to a clip of two cars dangerously close together, one orange and one navy. 

David Croft’s voice could be heard, “And there goes the Red Bull of Y/n L/n and the McLaren of Oscar Piastri! They are close together around that corner and they aren’t backing down. Are they going to make contact! And they do! Off the track they go, debris is everywhere. And I don’t think they are going to be able to continue.” 

You knew that you should not have “never backed down never what-ed.” But Oscar was going for it and so were you. And you felt terrible. You quickly used the halo to climb out. Looking over, Oscar was doing the same thing. 

The camera followed you as you made your way through the swarming stewards. You just knew that you needed to check on the Aussie. 

The crowds could hear David speak again, “Oh no. Looks like L/n is mad. Does Red Bull have a thing for drivers with anger issues?” 

Oscar looked up and saw you storming towards him, batting away the stewards hands. He stiffened, ready for anything. But what he didn’t expect was a giant hug. He could feel you shaking and he quickly put his hands around you. 

“I’m ok.”  

The screen flashes back to Oscar. 

He huffed, “She did. But the moment she got out of the car, she came to check on me. She batted away the stewards who were desperate to make sure that she was fine, since she took the brunt of the hit. If that doesn’t convince you that Y/n is a great friend and better driver, then I don’t know what will.” The Aussie looked livid. 

The scene cuts to now a new face, your manager. 

The interviewer asks, “What is something that people might not know about Y/n.” Vito put his hand to his chin. You had already given him the permission to talk about what might be discussed. 

He inhaled, “She’s strong. Not just physically, but mentally and emotionally as well.” 

“Can you give us an example?” 

“The kid was disowned in 2019, right before her F3 debut. And you know what she did? She put that F3 car in the P1 spot. She never showed it though. She held her head high, and was squeezing into her place, that was waiting for her, in this sport.” 

A quick flash of 16 year old you, holding your first F3 trophy, was shown on screen. 

Vito kept talking as the scene changed to you walking around your motor home, greeting everyone who was there. They knew what had happened, and comforted you with words and hugs. You were thankful for them. 

“She also lost her godfather Lorenzo in January 2020. It was heartbreaking to hear her over the phone. Her debut in F2 was the next day. I told her that she didn’t have to, but she insisted that she needed to race, to win.” 

The camera followed 17 year old you, helmet on and visor down, as you walked to your F2 car, shining with your new number. 

“In less than 24 hours, she was back in the car.” 

Your car sped down the straight, over the finish line. 

“And she won.” 

The scene shifted to 23 year old Max Verstappen handing you the big F2 trophy. Tears could be seen in your eyes as you took the cup and thanked him. 

“Did you know?” 

Max looked at her in bewilderment. “I didn’t. And you would have never guessed it. Y/n has her heart on her sleeve, everywhere she goes, except when she races.” 

A quick cut now shows Christian back in the seat. 

“The last driver I saw with that mental strength was Charles Leclerc. He previously lost his godfather, and then lost his father. A few days later he won his race. Y/n lost the only family she had in less than a year.” Christian laughed. “These rookies are built different. You’d think they were made for the earlier days of racing, with how much they put into it. But Y/n, I don’t know. Her aura commands attention.” 

The scenes now shown are from multiple races. 

The camera followed you as you walked through the crowded paddock, trying to get back to hospitality. You thought that it would be different, that you’d have to squeeze through to get by. But with each step you took, the people parted like water. 

You flashed a smile at many fans who seemed awestruck to be in your presence. 

A new driver is now in the seat. 

“She’s almost like Charles, in a sense,” Lando said. “The two of them,” he looked around, “I don’t know. It’s hard to describe.” 

“Can you try?” Lando shot her a cheeky grin. “They are basically the F1 royalty. Any driver has a ‘celebrity image’ and people are excited to see us outside. They ask to take pictures, but they also do things against us.” 

The scene cuts to multiple instances of booing and pushing drivers. 

“And yet, Charles and Y/n bend them to their will almost. They listen to them. The King and Queen of Formula 1.” 

A video of you, Lando, Max, and Charles speaking before the Monaco Grand Prix plays. 

“Ah, Max. Did I tell you that we have to address them as your highness now?” 

Max looked up from his phone and followed Lando’s finger that was pointed at Charles and you, deep in conversation.

“No? Why?” Lando walked over and showed him the edit and comments on his phone. 

The caption read “Y/n L/n and Charles Leclerc are F1 royalty and we need to address them as such.” The video that played started with a clip of Charles in Monaco, with the grid and Monegasque royalty behind him. He looked so majestic. It switched over to you in your home country, with a crowd around your pedestal. You hadn’t even won yet, and they looked at you as though you hung the moon. You stretched out your arms and the crowd roared.

Max looked back at the two, who were ignorantly blissed. Max looked up at Lando. 

“You’re right.” 

The camera is back to Charles. 

His eyes were wide with eyebrows raised, “Lando really said that.” He smirked. Shuffling up to good posture he said, “I’m fine with that. Y/n has always been different, but in a good way. She knows what the people wants, but also doesn’t get caught up in all the PR. She’s herself.” 

A clip of you with fans plays. Your smile was mirrored with theirs. Everyone wanted to see you, hug you, feel you. And the waves that were emanating from you only made the crowd happier. 

Now, the seat is occupied by none other than Sir Lewis Hamilton. 

“What do I think about Y/n?” he questions back to himself. “I know that she is one of the best rookies to ever come across in the world of Formula 1. I’ve had the opportunity to share podiums with so many drivers, but her? There’s something different.”

The scene flashes to a podium shared with you, Lewis, and Max. Lewis had been able to take the win, leaving you on the third step. You had almost had the win, but a late safety car ruined it. Lewis looked over at you, expecting a disappointed face. But all he saw was a smile that rivaled the sun. 

“She never seems to be disappointed with anything. Even if she was to qualify in last place, she would still smile.” Lewis laughed. “And I think everyone loves her more than they realize.” 

A small clip of you and a bulldog flashes across the screen. Roscoe was licking all over your face. 

“Roscoe, stop!” But you were laughing, and the dog thought that he should continue. Lewis found the two of you in the middle of the floor in the Mercedes hospitality. A blanket was draped around your shoulders.  

“And what are you doing here kid?” Lewis put his hands on his sides. 

You shrugged. “Toto told me I could hang out here. Max is having one of those ‘adult meetings’ that Christian says my ears shouldn’t hear. I think they forget that I’m 21 now.” 

Lewis just laughed, thinking of how Toto must have let you in and had given you a blanket as well. He just ruffled your hair and sat on the ground with you.  

The scene changes one more time. You are now in the seat. 

The interviewer asks, “Please state your name and your occupation.” 

You smiled, “My name is Y/n L/n and I am a Formula 1 racer who drives for the Oracle Red Bull Racing Formula 1 Team. I also DJ,” you shot finger guns at the camera and clicked you mouth, “Thanks Lando.” 

“How was your first season in Formula 1. You obviously showed the world of what you could do.” 

You nodded before continuing, “The season went better than I expected. To place third in the driver’s championship as a rookie? Unheard of.” You smirked. “Until now.” 

The person behind the camera continued, “You were only 10 points away from Charles Leclerc. How does that make you feel?” 

You cocked your head. “It feels wonderful. Charles had a really good season.” You leaned in as though to tell a secret. “If anything, don’t tell Charles or Max I said this, but Max and I would rather lose to Charles than anyone else.” 

“And why is that?” 

You deadpanned. “Well Charles is Lightning McQueen incarnate and Max’s emotional support rival. Who else would we want?” People laughed in the background. 

“Now that you know you could win a championship…” 

You cut her off, “Oh I’ve always known I could win a championship. But I also know that I was born to break records. And right now, I’m on a path to help Max break the 7 streak.” 

“Ah yes, sorry. What would you do after winning a championship.” You hadn’t seen Max slip in. 

“I think I’d pull a Nico Rosenburg. Ya know? Retire while I’m ahead.” 

“You would not do that!” Max said behind the camera and you looked straight at him. 

“Yes I would.” 

“No you wouldn’t. Because you said you were born to break records. Well Kid, if I make a record championship, you need to be the one to break it.” 

Oh my gosh, I loved how this chapter turned out. And it is officially the longest chapter I have written so far – 6,077 words. Right now, I have to write the chapter for the last race of F2 and you readers have to pretend that it lands on a weekend that the F1 drivers can attend. 

Also! I am pleased to announce that the first few chapters of a new series will be out shortly! It is called “Besties for the Resties” and it’s how you got close with many of the drivers. Not all of them will have their own chapter and not all the drivers are being written about. So please be aware that this will not be going over 10 chapters! 

Thank you to all my readers and Happy Thanksgiving!  

Tag List : @awekbachira @lightdragonrayne @leilanixx @angsthology @digitalizeduniqueness @topguncultleader @landosgirlxoxo @gods-menace @itsjustkhaos @thefandomswhre @alwaysboredsworld @vellicora @bintuabbas @sam-is-lost @empress-kimiko @assholeinatrenchcoat @kagatinkita @glitterquadricorn @zyonsay @tsukishimawhore @treehouse-mouse @ashy-kit @agent-curt-mega @julesbabey @lydialawrence @stopeatread @claudia5912 @nichmeddar @blueberry64857959 @laura-naruto-fan1998 @leptitlu @alessioayla @badassturtle13 @kaaale @wcnorris @cool-ultra-nerd @hockeyboysarehot @agent-curt-mega @myxticmoon @cmleitora @sam-is-lost

[girasollake]

everything i wanted

ꨄpairing: neteyam x fem!omaticaya!reader / jake sully x reader(platonic)

ꨄrequested: no

ꨄtype: mostly angst, some fluff

ꨄsummary: you always wanted to feel appreciated, neteyam always wanted to be the best warrior; in short: u seek validation in older men cause you dont have family and because you are the best warrior, neteyam is jealous of you, the whole fic roughly follows the plot of atwow!!! ummmm kinda enemies to lovers?????

ꨄwarnings: SPOILERS AHEAD, DONT READ IF U HAVENT SEEN ATWOW, mentions of being shot, angst, my bad writing cause i havent written anything since september, reader is a year older than neteyam

ꨄa/n: i feel like this is so bad i am sorry

ꨄword count: 3,402

‘How could you both be so stupid?’ You threw your hands in the air and shot a glare at Neteyam. ‘You could’ve died! Does that mean nothing to you? Your father explicitly told you to observe, not engage! You are like a child Neteyam, both you and Lo’ak!’

‘I wanted to stop him, he’s just too disobedient.’ He avoided your eyes.

‘And you had to take the blame again? He’s never going to learn if you keep doing that.’ You shook your head and sighed.

‘Can you stop? I’m the oldest and I need to protect my siblings.’

‘No. No, Neteyam. I am the oldest. I may not be your sibling but I am the oldest and, believe it or not, I wouldn’t forgive myself if anything happened to them.’

Especially you.

‘You can protect them, be a big brother, but don’t take credit for every stupid thing they do!’ You moved closer to him and snapped your fingers in front of his face to get his attention. ‘I know you want to prove your father you can be a warrior, but it doesn’t mean that you have to put your life at risk when Lo’ak does something stupid.’ You huffed. ‘Just be careful next time.’

Neteyam felt jealous of you, of the way his father trusted you enough to put you in risky missions because he knew you would survive, of the way he praised your fighting skills and of the way he put you on a pedestal. You were born during the first war with the sky people and both of your parents had died fighting. The clan surrounded you with love when you were growing up, but you had never had anyone to call a mother or a father. You were just an orphan trying to find a place alongside everyone that you crossed paths with. So, when Neteyam was jealous of you having his father approval and trust, you were jealous of him for having a real family. When you were younger you would hide behind the trees and watch them cuddle underneath the night sky, your little heart breaking and longing for this kind of comfort and love. Even though you were Omatikaya by blood you still sometimes felt like an outsider. You occupied your time with training, flying, shooting arrows and that’s why Jake was impressed, that’s why you were one of his favorite warriors and he knew he could trust you. He even got you your own gun, which Neteyam and Lo’ak were especially jealous of.

Deep down you knew what this was about. Jake cared about you, but not like he cared about his own children. That was the real reason you were sent on those missions, the reason he took you everywhere with him on fights. He just didn’t want to risk his sons life's. You knew that and you still took part in everything because those were the moments when you felt like you belong.

° 𐐪𐑂 ♡ 𐐪𐑂 ₒ 𐐪𐑂 ♡ 𐐪𐑂 °

‘Can we talk?’ Jake asked from behind you.

‘Of course, sir.’ You nodded your head and stopped sharpening the spears.

He sat down next to you and sighed.

‘We are leaving tomorrow.’ He said firmly. ‘This is not a safe place for my family anymore.’

‘Oh, I see.’ You whispered, a wave of sadness ran through your whole body.

‘I want you to come with us.’ Your ear twitched and you looked up at him with hopeful eyes. ‘And I want you to promise me you will protect my children when I won’t be able to do it myself.’

‘I promise.’ You answered quickly. ‘I’ll do my best, sir.’

He smiled at you and stood up, ‘Tomorrow after the ceremony. Be ready.’ He shot you one last glance and walked away.

The next day you were waiting for the Sully family by the ikrans, your thoughts were interrupted by a loud shriek of Tuk.

‘Are you coming with us (Y/n)?’ She asked after she ran up to you.

‘I am.’ You smiled at her and after giving you a hug she ran back to her mom in order to get on an ikran with her.

While you were checking your bags attached to your own animal, you felt someone intensely staring at the back of your head. You didn’t have to turn around to know it was Neteyam. You never knew why he gave you those weird glances, a part of you wished they weren’t that hateful. At first you tried being friends with him, but after a while his behavior towards you had changed. While you were getting along with his younger siblings, he was always staying away from you, watching your every move. The relationship between you felt like some sort of rivalry, but there was always this warm feeling you couldn’t shake off when you knew he was nearby.

After a long, tiring flight to the Metkayina clan you were exhausted, the thought of laying down was the only one in your head. You made the appropriate gesture towards the Tsahik and the Olo’eyktan when they arrived and you suddenly felt really small under Ronal’s gaze. She started walking around you all, examining your tails and postures.

‘Is this also your child, Jakesully?’ She asked, you could feel her judging eyes on you.

‘No. She’s not my child, but she is the best warrior in our clan and she is important to my family.’

‘Is that true?’ She moved to look into your eyes.

‘Yes, Tsahik Ronal.’ You gave her a long nod and felt the warm feeling spreading in your heart after hearing that you were important to the Sully’s.

She whispered something to herself and went back to her husband who a moment later agreed that all of you could stay with them. You smiled to yourself when you were walking through the village following Tsireya, everything felt so fresh and untouched by war, those people didn’t live in fear unlike your clan. You dropped your belongings on the floor and went over to Neytiri to help her.

‘It’s okay, you can go with others and learn the Metkayina ways, I can handle the unpacking.’ She told you and put her hand on your arm.

‘Are you sure?’

‘Yes, go.’ She smiled sweetly and playfully pushed you towards the exit of your new home.

You ran towards the shore and started looking for your friends. When you finally spotted them you quickly jumped into the water and swam quickly in their direction.

‘Can I join?’ You asked Tsireya when you emerged from the water.

‘Of course!’ She gave you a smile. ‘Follow us everyone.’

After swimming for a while she took all of you to meet the ilu’s and learn how to ride them. You were scared of failure, especially after seeing how fast Lo’ak let go of his ilu. Tsireya helped you get on the animal and told you that you’re gonna be okay, you just have to hold it tight.

‘How could she not be fine? She’s the best warrior after all.’ Neteyam muttered with annoyance.

‘Stop it.’ Kiri smacked his arm.

‘What? She shouldn’t be here, her place is with the clan. I don’t even get why she’s here with us in the first place.’

‘It’s not my fault your dad values my skills more than he does yours.’ You replied harshly and then without a second thought told your ilu in your mind to go forward.

You felt angry at Neteyam, rage was filling your body. You were the best for a reason and you would prove that to him. You tightened your grip on the handle attached to the animal’s body and took the biggest breath in your life before diving into the depths of the ocean. The speed was horrible and you felt your hand slowly relaxing.

No. I won’t give him the satisfaction.

You tightened your fist and held the handle even harder than before. After readjusting your position and squeezing your thighs to feel more steady you felt the oxygen slowly leaving your lungs. You shut your eyes and rode upwards, soon emerging from the water and jumping with your ilu only to dive again. You rode over to your friends and smiled at Tsireya. Everyone was impressed, because this was your first try and it definitely required special skills to get it this perfect. Annoyance was written on Neteyam’s face, he scoffed and started swimming away. You sighed and got off the ilu.

‘Neteyam, wait!’ You screamed and swam towards him.

He didn’t even look back and you reached him after you both got out of the water.

‘Neteyam, what happened?’ You touched his arm and he immediately turned around to face you.

‘You happened.’ He scoffed. ‘I am tired of you taking my place all the time. I try so hard to meet my dad’s standards and it’s never appreciated because of you!’

‘It’s not my fau-‘

‘It is. It is your fault.’ He interrupted your sentence and walked away quickly.

And there it was again. The feeling of loneliness consumed you once again, when the boy you adored walked away feeling only hatred towards you. Sure, you were often picking fights with him, replying to his comments with the same energy, but maybe this time you really did take it too far?

° 𐐪𐑂 ♡ 𐐪𐑂 ₒ 𐐪𐑂 ♡ 𐐪𐑂 °

You were helping Tsireya with some of the duties one day and Neteyam was far from you, but still in your sight. You were stealing quick glances at him so that your friend wouldn’t see it, when suddenly he quickly swam away and you couldn’t see him anymore. You excused yourself and left Tsireya by herself to go and see what had happened that made him go that fast. The closer you got to the direction he swam towards, the better you heard voices screaming and sounds of fighting. You came over to Kiri, she was softly laughing at the pile of boys in front of her. You had to admit it was funny, but at the same time you were all supposed to be on your best behavior. Because of that, you walked over to them and hissed loudly, their heads turning to face you.

‘Enough.’ You spat and looked over at Lo’ak and Neteyam. ‘Both of you.’

They stood up and walked towards Kiri, you hissed at the Metkayina boys once again and turned around to join the Sully’s.

‘It was going well, you didn’t have to-‘

‘Was it, Lo’ak?’ You stopped and looked at him. ‘You were supposed to be on your best behavior, what were you thinking?’ You turned to the older boy.

He didn’t reply to you, he just took his brother by his arm and walked away.

‘You are both unbelievable.’ Kiri whispered making you turn your head in her direction.

‘What do you mean?’

‘Just tell him you like him already.’ She whined.

‘You know I can’t.’ A sigh escaped your lips. ‘He hates me, Kiri. He sees me as a rival, he despises me.’

‘He doesn’t.’

‘He does.’ You said louder. ‘I don’t want to talk about it anymore, let’s go.’

‘Lo’ak was the one that started that fight, he was just helping him.’

‘I know.’ You replied and looked down, soon arriving at your home.

‘And you? Why weren’t you keeping an eye on them?’ Jake turned to you when you entered the shack.

‘I’m sorry, I was helping Tsireya.’ You avoided his gaze. ‘Next time I won’t let anything happen to them.’

And you were right.

You jumped down from your ikran and landed on the sky people’s ship. Neteyam found his way to his siblings and Tsireya as fast as you, jumping onto the deck from his ilu. You shot your arrows towards some sky people coming towards you.

‘Cut the handcuffs!’ You told him when he reached you.

‘Come on, bro. Hurry up!’ Lo’ak screamed at his brother.

You turned around and saw Tsireya and Tuk jumping into the water, ‘Go! Both of you!’ You yelled at the brothers.

Neteyam started dragging the boy away, ‘They have Spider! We have to help him!’ Lo’ak tugged on his brother’s arm.

You locked your eyes with Neteyam, ‘Shit!’ He hissed. ‘Okay, let’s go.’

‘No, you are not going anywhere.’ You stopped both of them. ‘Go back to your father, right now.’

‘We have to help Spider, please (Y/n).’ Lo’ak looked at you with terrified eyes.

‘UGH!’ You shook your head and hang your bow on your body. ‘Just stay close.’ You told them and ran towards the inside of the ship.

You were quietly moving on the big pipe on the ceiling when some people started walking your way, Spider was surrounded by them in a circle. All three of you jumped down at the people and freed your friend, but then a pure moment of joy was interrupted by gunshots firing your way.

‘Go! Go!’ You screamed and pushed the boys towards a wall that would hide all of you.

Neteyam snatched the gun from Lo’ak and started shooting at the enemies, you pulled out the gun Jake had gifted you and helped him.

‘I’ll tell you when to jump and you jump!’ You shouted and looked over at them, they were rapidly nodding their heads. You gave a few more shots towards the enemies and took a deep breath. ‘Now!’

Lo’ak and Spider jumped quickly into the water, you pushed Neteyam first and jumped as the last person. For a second you felt relief when you heard their happy screams, but it was washed away when you started struggling with keeping your head above the water. Adrenaline started coming down and you felt your lower abdomen on fire.

‘Yes! We did it bro!’ Lo’ak hugged his brother who was laughing softly.

‘Come on! We need to go!’ Neteyam yelled when Tsireya came up from the water riding her ilu.

‘Nete…Neteyam…’ You coughed.

His smile faded and he rapidly swam towards you.

‘I’m shot you skxawng.’

‘Shit! Shit!’ He cursed. ‘Just hold on a second!’ He held you tightly and sat you down on the ilu. ‘It’s okay, just hold on.’ His panicked voice echoed through your ears.

He saw his father standing on a rock and everyone started screaming for him. A worried expression came up on his face when he saw his son holding you tightly.

‘She’s shot, dad, help her!’ They started pulling you up to rest you on the wet rock.

Jake inspected your body only to see a big wound on your lower stomach which was quickly bleeding out.

‘Take her to the village, right now.’ He told Neteyam and helped put you on the animal again.

Neteyam held you in his arms as he tried to ride the animal as quickly as he could without causing more damage to you.

‘Hold on, okay? Don’t you dare die on me!’ He yelled to you.

‘But I am so sleepy, Nete..’ Your voice was weak, but he still heard you.

‘No, don’t sleep, we’re right there, just…Just hold on..’ He finally saw the village and hope filled him up. ‘We’re here, it’s okay. It’s gonna be okay.’ He looked down at you to check if your eyes were still open and he saw you slowly blinking. ‘HELP! I NEED HELP!’ He screamed as loud as he could which caught the attention of some people by the coast, they quickly ran to get the Tsahik who was helping other wounded warriors.

‘Neteyam..’ You coughed.

‘We’re here, hold on for me.’ He looked down at you again.

‘I see…’ Your voice was getting weaker. ‘I see you, Neteyam.’ You whispered and closed your eyes.

‘No. No, no, no. Help! I need the Tsahik!’ He got off the ilu holding your limp body in his arms.

Ronal emerged from behind the people and told him to put you in one of the shacks. The Tsahik pushed him outside and covered the entrance with a curtain made out of big leaves and seaweed. Neteyam finally felt the tears on his face which previously were washed away by the splashing water. He didn’t know what to do, fear, sadness and adrenaline were running through his body. He waited for what felt like hours and when he felt Tuk’s arms around him all of a sudden he felt safe. His whole family was okay and when he came eye to eye with his father, he broke down crying again. Jake hugged his son and caressed his hair with his hand. A sudden rustle made Neteyam break the comforting hug. Everyone turned towards the sound, Ronal was standing in front of the shack, her expression was unreadable. She locked eyes with Neteyam.

‘She’s alive. Barely.’ She stated.

‘Thank you, Great Mother.’ Kiri whispered and hugged her brother from the side.

‘She needs a lot of rest and I am not certain if she will survive the night.’ Ronal said and started walking away. ‘Do not bother her. Now it is all up to Eywa.’

° 𐐪𐑂 ♡ 𐐪𐑂 ₒ 𐐪𐑂 ♡ 𐐪𐑂 °

Your nostrils were filled with a disgusting smell which made you slowly open your eyes. You saw Ronal putting some type of paste on your wound and you hissed.

‘I guess this means I’m not dead.’ You whispered, your voice hoarse.

‘No, but it was close.’ She replied and wrapped some bandages around your stomach. ‘Rest, my child.’ She whispered and walked out, leaving you alone once again.

After a while the silence was interrupted by Jake, ‘Hi.’ He said as he sat down next to you.

‘I told you I’d keep them safe.’ You weakly smiled at him and he let out a soft laugh.

‘Yeah, I knew you would.’ His smile quickly faded. ‘I.. I wanted to thank you. For protecting them. And I’m sorry for using you so much, on all of those fights… I forget that you are still young, god… You’re only a year older than Neteyam and I’ve never thought something like this would happen to you…’ He paused. ‘You have a whole life in front of you, I’m sorry for trying to take that away and not protecting you.’

‘It’s okay.’ You whispered. ‘I know you only wanted to keep your family safe.’

He nodded and stood up, a tear fell down his cheek. He looked like he wanted to say something more, but nothing came out, he gave you one last smile and walked outside. After a while you closed your eyes because the light started bothering you, but you immediately opened them when you felt someone put their hand in yours. You looked at the way your fingers were intertwined with Neteyam’s and gave him a soft smile.

‘I’m so sorry.’ He whispered.

‘You have nothing to be sorry about.’ You coughed out.

‘I have. I am sorry for getting angry at you, for getting jealous about my father and for..’

‘Hey, it’s okay.’ You whispered and stroked his hand with your thumb. ‘And I’m sorry too, I shouldn’t be taking your place by your dad’s side.’

He nodded and squeezed your hand, ‘It’s okay, I know you just wanted someone to be proud of you. Kiri told me how… How you feel like an outsider all the time, because you don’t have…’

‘Parents?’

‘Yeah.’ He looked down at the floor.

‘After all these years I got used to having no one, but when your dad and other warriors from the clan were so proud of me… I just felt this hapiness that I finally belong somewhere, that’s why I always wanted to be the best…I’m sorry again, Neteyam.’

‘I forgive you.’ He smiled. ‘I can’t believe you were ready to die for me.’ He softly laughed and you reciprocated the smile.

‘I can.’ You whispered. ‘And I forgive you too, for being so mean to me.’ Your smile grew wider. ‘But you were cute when you were angry.’

‘Is that so?’ You gave him a long nod. ‘And now I’m not?’

‘No.’

‘Liar.’

Your giggles filled up the space around you and you didn’t even notice when he got so close to your face. You felt his breath on your skin and he put his other hand on your cheek.

‘I always thought you hated me.’ You whispered into his lips.

‘Do you still think that?’

‘No.’ It left your lips more like a breath rather than a word.

He finally closed the gap between you and it all just felt right. His lips on yours felt so right. You finally felt like you were not alone.

‘I see you, (Y/n).’

likes and reblogs are appreciated<3

taglist: @neteyamsgirl @vviolaswrld

[littlebumblebeesstuff]

Request: heyy idk if you write for bucky barnes but if you do could you do a bucky x little reader who's never had someone who actually cared for her? like she never had a cg or her parents always neglected her so she keeps feeling like shes a burden to Bucky?

For @crazyforbarnes - I hope you enjoy!

Notes: GN!Reader, fluff, angst, mentions of trust issues and neglect

Not alone anymore

Work. Home. Eat. Sleep.

Work. Home. Eat. Sleep.

Work. Home. Eat. Sleep.

The repetitive routine was long and hard but you just kept pushing through. You had always had to work hard and you had no choice but to work in the little downtown cafe to pay rent and bills.

Of course Bucky had tried to encourage you to move in with him, but you were so ingrained into your own personal survival mode that you kept refusing.

The only escape you had was stepping into your little apartment, or into Bucky's floor in the Tower and letting yourself regress.

Unfortunately, there was a difference between regressing alone and with Bucky.

When alone you could be as little as 3, and you had the small spare room as your little space so that you wouldn't hurt yourself.

With Bucky, you never got younger than 6/7.

To say you had parental issues was an overstatement. Born the 7th child of a family that couldn't care for themselves you were often neglected and left to look after yourself.

So when Bucky stepped into his place as your dada, you couldn't stop yourself from still trying to be independent.

It was finally the weekend and you were staying with Bucky in the Tower. He was in the kitchen cooking as you finished up some paperwork.

You had been pushing away your regression for the whole week, under pressure to finish this project but now you were just overwhelmed, over tired, hungry, and frustrated.

All too big for your little brain to handle at the moment.

Bucky had a 6th sense about your regression. He knew that you were holding back but he always let you do what you wanted to do so that he could build that trust. He knew that you struggled to let anyone in and to let yourself be loved, but he hated seeing how hard you worked yourself because you believed that was the only way you would be worthy of attention and praise.

With a dish towel slung over his shoulder he walked up behind you where you were working at the dining table and gently starts to rub your shoulders, hoping to give you a little nudge towards regressing.

"Hiya pumpkin, dinner is almost ready. How about we get you into some comfies, huh?"

His voice was a soft rumble, tugging at that loose thread in your head in hopes that it would all unravel.

"Can't da-Bucky, gotta finish 'dis" Your own words were soft and slurred as you did feel yourself slipping.

The appeal of getting into comfy pjs and cuddling your dada while a movie played was slowly starting to take over the urge to finish the project.

"Hmmm.... Pumpkin, it's not your job to finish all this. You can go in on Monday and your team can help you. You need to rest too. You deserve it"

You shook your head, doubling down on your work. Your stubbornness drew a sigh from Bucky who gently took the pencil from you and pulled the chair away from the desk so you couldn't keep working.

He squatted down, cool metal hand cupping your cheek as he guides you to look at him.

"Baby, it's time to stop. No more working tonight, how about we-"

"But I have to finish dis!" You normally would never interrupt Bucky, but right now you were on the verge of regressing and also your exhaustion and frustration was starting to manifest itself as a temper tantrum.

Rather than getting frustrated, Bucky held your hands in his, attempting to calm you down a little bit.

"Pumpkin... can you tell me why you don't want me to look after you and help you regress? Am I doing something wrong?"

Bucky felt confused. He worked so hard to make you feel safe and comfortable when you regressed, but it was as if you didn't trust him.

"I- I, you not doing something wrong.." Your speech started to slip more and more, your own frustrations becoming too difficult to explain.

"I just never had a daddy or mummy.... always jus' me"

You couldn't bring yourself to look at Bucky as you spoke, instead deciding to look at your feet.

Bucky felt his heart break at your words. It wasn't that you didn't trust him- you simply didn't know how to let yourself be little and let someone look after you.

"Ok..... ok. Pumpkin, how about tonight we try something different, hmm? How about dada makes all the big decisions and you can just relax"

Bucky hoped that by getting you to agree to let him make decisions that you would let yourself properly regress without your survival instincts kicking in.

You take a moment to think about it.... it did sound nice to have dada making all the big decisions...

Finally you nod and Bucky breaks out into a big smile, kissing your forehead.

"That's dada's brave lil' pumpkin! Now, let's get you into some comfies"

Scooping you up into his arms, Bucky walks into his room, all the while pressing kisses over your cheeks, forehead, and nose.

By your little giggles, he was already very aware that you had regressed younger than you ever had before with him.

However, when you first brought up age regression he had done so much research and had bought a load of different things for different ages.

Wanting to give you the best experience as he could, he kept you on his hip as he dug around in his drawers for a duck print onesie that he had always wanted to use.

Once he had it, he sat you on the bed and helped you get changed.

"Aaand there goes one sock! And two socks! Now we gotta lift those little arms up to take your top off- that's it, you are doing so good Pumpkin!"

Soon you were in the fluffy duck print onesie, with fluffy socks in to protect your feet from the cold tiles of the floor.

Before leaving the room, he snuck a paci into his pocket.

Bucky took you through to the living room, setting you down on the massive sofa and making sure that you were propped up by pillows. He asked Jarvis to put on Bluey for you while he went and sorted dinner.

He could still see you from the open plan kitchen as he put the meal that he had originally prepared in the fridge and instead made you a plate of chicken nuggets, apple slices, cheese cubes, carrots and some goldfish crackers.

You were really engrossed in the cartoon that Bucky had to sit you on his lap and hand fed you your food.

He praised you for every bite and kissed your cheeks when you finished everything.

It felt so natural to be looking after you like this. You let yourself relax and you were so desperate for it that you couldn't even try to look after yourself.

Soon you were full and snuggled up on Buckys lap, staring to doze off as your day of big emotions caught up with you. Looking down to check up on you, Bucky smiled as he sees that you have put your thumb in your mouth as you self soothe.

"Oh baby, let's not put our fingers in our mouth- look, dada has a paci for you"

He gently pulls your thumb out of your mouth, aware that you are half asleep and eases the paci in to replace it.

Your eyes slip shut as you sook on the paci, your body finally giving in and letting you drift off to dreamland.

Bucky waits for a couple of minutes, to make sure he doesn't disturb you, before slowly standing up and carrying you to bed.

He asks Jarvis to turn everything off as he tucks you into bed before quickly changing into his own pyjama pants and laying in bed, tucking you into his chest.

Sometimes you will have bad days, ones where you feel like you have to look after yourself. But Bucky will always be there to help you.

[corrodedcoffins-blog]

Lake House Days

jack hughes x teen mom!reader

note: i love writing little kid dialogue

word count: 1.3k

Bringing the twins anywhere was hard, but having to fly and a long drive to the lake house, was a big trip for the kids. And a very long day for Y/n. All that along with meeting new people, well she knew Jack’s parents, and his brothers, and she met Trevor once. But this would be the first time Jack’s family (minus Luke) and friends were meeting her kids. What if they didn’t like their son dating someone with kids, of course they did know, but knowing and seeing were different things. 

“Love, you okay?” Jack’s soothing voice broke Y/n out of her anxious thoughts, just like he always does.

“Yeah, just a little nervous.” “About what?” The man gives his girlfriend's thigh a gentle and reassuring squeeze, from where said hand had been resting since they got in the car. Y/n checked over her shoulder, seeing the twins sleeping soundly, Abby’s head leaning on her brother’s shoulder, smiling Y/n turned her attention back to her boyfriend.

“Just of everyone meeting the twins… Your parents and Quinn meeting the twins.” The woman admits, her voice low, more aware of her sleeping children now. 

“They are going to love them, they love kids and my family loved you when you met for the first time.” Jack assured her, making a quick glance taking in her reaction before returning his eyes to the road and continuing, “Abby and Eli charm anyone they meet, without them charming me, I would have never talked to you.” “Shut up.” The woman says, smiling. 

“Well I hope you got the last of your nerves out because we’re here.” Jack says, pulling into the long driveway of the beautiful and large lake house. Putting the car in park among the impressive number of cars already here, and turning to face the younger girl.

“Ready?” “As I’ll ever be.”

As Y/n slowly tried to wake up the twins, Jack unpacked the car, in the end neither child was ready to wake just yet, leading to Y/n carrying Abby and Jack carrying Eli. The door opened before Jack could open it himself, the image of Quinn in their sights. 

“Hey- oh hi.” the man says more quietly after realising the sleepiness in both the twins' faces.”Hey Quinny.” Jack greets his brother, doing the usual bro hug guys to, as well as he could with Eli in his arms. “We’re gonna put these two in their room, then we’ll come down and see everyone.”

Jack and Y/n walk down the stairs after Y/n finally got Eli settled. “Hi Y/n!” Ellen says seeing the couple coming down and bringing Y/n into a tight hug, “Hi Ellen!” “Where are Eli and Abby?” truthfully Y/n never thought Ellen or any of Jack’s family would care to know her children, and it was never anything they had done, in actuality they have done everything to disprove that notion. But with years of dating as a single mother it was more common than not that any partner's family wouldn’t want anything to do with her babies. “They're both napping, they've had a long day already.” “Oh of course! Believe me I know.” 

-

Spending the past hour without the twins and just getting to know Jack’s family and friends better first, had done a lot to ease her anxiety that this time would in fact be different. Y/n and Ellen talked all about how fast your kids grow, Y/n didn’t really have mom friends so it was refreshing to talk about her kids with someone that could relate. This along with Ellen telling many child Jack stories, much to the man’s dismay. 

“Mommy?” A quiet, sleepy voice mumbled rubbing his eye with one hand and his sister’s in the other, the young girl’s own other hand holding her most prized possession, her blanky. 

“Hi huns! You’re up?” Her rhetorical question causes the girl to nod her head, while jumping into her mom’s lap. Eli walked over to lean his arms on her arm rest, and his head on her chest. “Ready to meet everyone?” The twins’ mother whispered, while most people surrounding the fire were watching. Both 5 year olds nodding their heads, Y/n continues, “This is Ellen and Jim, they’re Jack’s parents.” The woman says, directing their attention to her right where Ellen and Jim sat. Both children mumble a quiet ‘Hi’ back. “And that’s Quinn, Jack’s other brother.” The same routine continued on, the two successfully convinced all that they were shy. Until Eli walked up to Trevor and sat on his lap, mischief must detect mischief, but Abby stuck to sitting with her mom. Scoping out who here will be her best friend. 

-

“Hun, I need to put sunscreen on you.” Y/n said, trying to reason with her son. She already got Abby ready, Abby was only difficult getting ready if she had a reason to be, Eli however was difficult just because it was fun.

“No!” “Baby, if you don’t put this on you’re gonna get burnt just like Lia did last summer remember? She could barely move, do you want that to happen to you.” “No..” The boy mumbled, accepting defeat and lifting his arm for his mom. “Thank you.”

“Jacka, what we doing today?” Abby was going through a phase of adding ‘a’ to random words in her sentences leading to her giving Jack the new nickname. While the young girl was letting Jack put on her shoes, the man answered her question excitedly and lifting the girl off the bed and onto the floor, “Going on the lake today!” “On boat?” “Yes ‘on boat’.” “Momma we going on boat” She repeated for her mom, even though the woman was a foot away from her and already heard it. “Maybe, hunny. Not for sure. Okay! You’re both ready, how ‘bout you guys go downstairs and help Ellen with snacks?” “Okayyy!” “Okay-a!” Both children yell, running out of the room.

Once they were excited, Jack pushed the bedroom door closed and walked over to his girlfriend. In the time that they’ve been dating, when the twins are around you take any time alone together you can get. Leaning down only slightly Jack gently presses his lips to Y/n’s, her immediately kissing him back. Her hands went around his neck, his own resting on her lower back just above her ass.

Breaking apart Y/n whispers against his mouth, “Okay, ready?” “Yep” he says, stealing a quick peck before exiting the room himself.

-

“I spy… Something invisible.” Eli announces, turning from looking all around him to looking at Trevor and Cole. “What’s invisible?” the taller boy asked, he’d been taking the game pretty seriously and Eli just threw a curveball at him. “Dude, I don’t know!” Before the two could embarrass themselves, Eli stepped in, “The air!!!” “Oh! Duh!” “Good one, man!”

This was too complex for Eli’s brain but he often latched onto male figures in his life; of course he had Lia’s dad but he didn’t see him often, so not having one for himself, he loved Jack and his friends, they gave him what he didn't have. 

Y/n was watching the three play eye spy from her spot on Jack’s lap. And checking over at Ellen and Abby playing ‘Go Fisha’ as Abby calls it. After a moment of Jack not having her full attention, he brings his right hand from the woman’s lower back to rub her upper thigh, grabbing her attention once again.

“You okay?” “Yeah.” Y/n says, a smile from ear to ear spreading across her face. She is so happy. Having Jack, and people besides herself and the people she considers family (Lia and her parents) caring about the twins I was something she wasn’t sure she would ever feel. Last night even, Y/n put the kids to bed and Eli asked her if Jack was going to be their dad, it almost made her cry on the spot. But what did make her cry happy tears was that her answer, not that she spoke it to Eli, was closer to a ‘yes’ than a ‘no’.

“Yeah, I’m really happy.”

~taglist~

@yabbadabbawhosposts @mallory78 @fulla02 @mostellasm

[milliesdiary]

What if you are Jace's sister and he realizes you are in love with Aemond (and he also finds out that you two have been having premarital sex) which causes a fight so you go to Aemond for comfort and he soothes you

𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐃𝐋𝐄𝐒𝐒 𝐕𝐎𝐖

𝐢𝐧𝐜𝐥𝐮𝐝𝐞𝐬; princess!reader, targcest, mentions of sex. for some context: reader is daemon’s bastard child who rhaenyra welcomed as a part of the family. yes, aemond is a hypocrite :/ we still love him tho!! 

𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞; ngl this has been sitting in my drafts for awhile because i hate it. im going to be working on commissions for a bit though, so i decided to post it anyway to keep you guys fed :) please reblog and comment with your feedback. it means the world to me and keeps me motivated! ♡

"𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄 𝐀𝐄𝐌𝐎𝐍𝐃."

Those were Jace’s words the second you walked into the dining room for breakfast. They take you aback, shock you into a frozen stupor. 

You and your family have been in King’s Landing for the past few weeks, trying to set aside their differences with the Greens and do their best to reconcile. It has been rough for your younger brothers, though you have been having a brilliant time. 

You and Helaena spend plenty of time together, Alicent treats you kindly, and Aegon leaves you alone. And Aemond? Well... you and Aemond are closer than most in terms of relationships. 

But that’s a story for another day. 

No one else is in the room thankfully — Luke wakes up later in the day, Helaena is presumably outside catching bugs, and your mother is probably off at a meeting with the court — so it’s just you, your younger brother, and the few servants that set the table. 

“What?”

Jace gives you an unimpressed look; his chestnut-brown eyes are slightly narrowed, lips melded into a frown. “You love Aemond,” he repeats. 

Your heart nearly stops when he says it, and you’re instantly terrified you’ve been caught. It would appear that misfortune has a tendency of catching you off guard. You honestly don’t know what to say. 

“...That is quite an accusation,” you try to deadpan. That heated expression of his is chilling; you invite him to sit next to you in hopes of extinguishing it. “Why don’t you just sit down and eat?”

Jace isn’t deterred. He holds his head high and keeps his voice stern; a trait he has undoubtedly learned from your mother. “You told me a couple moons ago that you had no affections for him.”

Oh, Gods. You don’t really want to sit here and listen to him complain about how much of a burden you are from rejecting all of your parents’ attempts at arranging a marriage. For hating every single man they tried to set you up with. You scold yourself more than enough. 

“I know what I said. And I mean it. I do not love him, Jace.” You let out a nervous laugh, trying to come across as naïve. The servants are staring now. “What has brought this on?” 

“You must think of me as a fool.”

“What do you mean?”

“Why are you acting so innocent?” 

“I don’t love him, Jacaerys. I swear it.” A bitter lie. 

For a fleeting moment, you think you’ve won; your brother stands next to the table without saying a word, his mouth clamped shut as he bites the inside of his cheek. 

And then he drops the bomb. 

“I know you have been seeing each other,” Jace says. It doesn’t come out as a question; it’s a statement. “Stealing each other away in the night.”

Your heart drops in a single second. How does he...? 

For these past few weeks, you thought you were being careful. Undetected. There was never anyone around when you slipped through the dark halls of the Red Keep every night and sidled up to Aemond’s door. Not a single voice to stop you as Aemond tugged you into his room and spoke High Valyrian in your ear as he undressed you, as he kissed you senseless, fucked you senseless. It was a dangerous game, of course — but you never actually expected to get caught. 

“…Where did you hear that?”  

“A kingsguard told me that you parted from his company last night.” Jace’s mouth twists into a disgusted frown. He hesitates, almost like he physically can’t say what comes next. “...From his chambers.”

In that moment, you knew it was over. The gist was up. 

“Jace…”

“Tell me it isn’t true.” 

And that’s the thing: you can’t say you don’t love Aemond, because it would be the furthest thing from the truth. Your hands fall to your lap and you fist your hands in the skirt of your dress, begging for courage. 

“Don’t tell mother.” 

Your response — shameful and pleading — speaks volumes. It makes Jace’s skin boil; he had been praying that the knight was wrong. And that hope he clung to so religiously? It’s gone. You can feel the symptoms of a dispute brewing: sweaty hands, agitated eyes, labored breathing. Tension hangs over you like a dark cloud and refuses to dissipate. 

“Why?” Jace looks disgusted, repulsed even. It sparks a flame inside you. “You saw his true colors that night. All of us did. Baela, Rhaena. Luke.”

You know what he’s referring to. It is a memory that you want to squeeze the life out of. 

“I thought we talked about you sorting out your priorities,” he continues. “What self-respecting daughter of the future Queen runs off and beds whoever she likes without a marriage proposal?” 

Yes, perhaps your growing annoyance is misplaced. Your brother wants the best for you, and it’s only natural that he would have his reservations about Aemond.

But he doesn’t know the man like you do; he hasn’t seen his hidden softness.

Sometimes people lose their ability to be recognized when they are joyful — in a pleasant way, of course. Aemond is one of those people. You’ve seen him smile once before. Truly smile. It was not sly, snarky, or coy; for once, it was the sincere kind. You wished he would do it more. It was incredibly beautiful.

If only Jace could have experienced it.

“Don’t speak about him like that,” you mumble. 

"I won't restrain myself to appease your ignorance.” 

Inhaling sharply, you take a seat at the table and busy yourself by playing with the napkin beside your plate. It’s a feeble attempt at controlling your rising panic. Jace must think you’re acting a bit too calm, because he seems to bristle at your alleged indifference. “I am sorry I didn’t tell you. Really, I am. I was just scared—“

“You lied.” 

“It was a white lie. No harm was meant to come from it.”

Jace fixes you with a firm scowl. “A white lie? A white lie? Meddling with our uncle who you are not betrothed to is not something that just happens.”

“You are blowing this out of proportion. I did it to keep you from getting upset and—“

“This is not just about the lie itself,” Jace huffs. 

“Then what is it?”

“You believed I wasn't worth your honesty.” 

Your gut tightens at his remark — you know he’s right and that he deserves to be informed of such things. Finding out that someone you care for is hiding something this important is a rude awakening. 

But you can’t stop. 

“I knew you would act like this,” you retort. Raising your voice wasn’t planned, but it happens anyway. It feels like your veins are being ripped to bits as the telltale marks of wrath sweep throughout your body. “I will do you a favor next time and not tell you anything at all.” 

“Or you could not encourage him,” Jace spits out. “You think that he does not act like his brother, Aegon? For all you know, he could be gallivanting with a servant every second he is not with you.” 

Your jaw tightens so firmly that it seems to lock in place. You’re pissed now. “Aemond is not like that.” 

“When you see him next, you can tell him to jump in the damn Dragonpit,” Jace continues. You aren’t used to hearing such crude language from him; it has you reeling. “Perhaps he’ll do that after he’s done fucking you.”

Something inside you bursts. Agonizingly. Ferociously. It's a jolt to your system that throws everything off-kilter. It is a painful fury that splits you in two. 

You slam your palms down on the table and rise in your chair; you're astonished the wood doesn't split with the force of it. The plates and forks clatter, and Jace almost jumps. The servants bustling around you certainly do. 

Your brother has some nerve. You want to spit foul names in his face. Wish to seize him by the collar and force him to kneel before your feet, because why? Why can’t you be with who you want? First it was Daemon who denied that you ever get betrothed to Aemond. Then it was your mother, and now it’s him. 

“I do not need protecting, Jace!” Your chest is rising and falling faster now, like the erratic pull of the tides. It feels like there is so much bottled up energy inside of you that you could scream, erupt, or break something … you need to break something. You choose his spirit. “I don’t need you at all!” 

Jace’s expression falls then. Along with it goes your anger. 

His gaze flits to the ground for a second — as if the stone is a safe haven from your wrath — and you’re about to apologize when he lifts his chin to glare daggers at you. 

“I get it now,” Jace laughs bitterly, shaking his head in disbelief. “You would do anything to be held by him. Ceasing to care about who he might hurt next and ignoring his callousness. You see only what you want.”

In his rage, Jace’s lips spew poison from deep in his chest, a dark place that you didn't even know he had.

“You make me wonder how I ended up with a delusional lunatic for a sister.“

Dead silence.

The two of you are just staring at each other now. Jace braces himself when you step away from your seat; he looks like he’s expecting you to slap him, like he’s preparing himself for the sting. 

And as much as you would like to do it, you just walk away.

You’re not even sure if Jace tries to stop you at first. Not sure if a servant tries to tries to grab you by the arm. You are running on pure adrenaline, pure buzzing energy, blood pumping like a battle cry in both eardrums. 

It takes until you’re exiting through the giant wooden doors to hear Jace yelling your name — and you loathe how worried he sounds, detest it — and then you’re practically running through the stone hallways. 

You want to go to bed. Shut everyone out and sleep until you awaken in a different world: one where you are not expected to get married to certain people, where your brother doesn’t expect you to be a person you can’t, and the 'losing an eye’ thing never happened, and … and it’s just you, Aemond, wrapped up in the sheets of your mattress. That’s all. 

The world is just cruel. 

Every step echoes as you make a beeline for your room. Tears slip down your cheeks and your fists quake; everything hurts. Emotionally, at least. You’re too worn out, too aggravated, too... mad? Hell, you’re not even sure if you’re still mad. The emotion that rips you apart right now feels more like an indigo-drenched sadness than a red-hot anger. 

It’s a strange, crushing feeling that has you stifling a sob while rounding a corner. 

But, as if the universe hates you, you catch a glimpse of that ethereal man — the fucking bane of your existence — walking down the same hallway. His back is to you, long white hair swishing with every stride he takes, and his posture is strong. 

You don’t want to ruin his day. Spoil the mood, or show how weak you can be.

You call out his name anyway, because there’s only one thing you can think of in this moment. A mantra:

I need you right now, My Prince.

I need you to truly look at me and understand me.

Aemond, I need you to see me.

The man turns then. He says your name, and you, who denied loving him, practically run and throw yourself into his arms. 

For a moment, Aemond doesn’t move a muscle; he’s confused, at a total loss. But then his palms slowly come down to your waist, supporting your body as he allows you to sniffle into his tunic. 

He doesn’t speak for awhile. Instead, he just looks down at you.

Your cheeks are dressed in tears that resemble droplets of honey. Your gardenia scented hair, pressed against his chest, is beautiful. He discovers an unexpected heaven amidst your grief. 

“He doesn’t want us to be together,” you try to whisper, but the words falter and trickle pitifully out of your mouth. They lack the power that you so urgently need. 

At first, Aemond is silent. He has no idea what you’re talking about; and then it clicks. Jace. 

Aemond has never been one to comfort others. You don’t really expect him to do much, honestly. But when he decides to speak, his tone is gentle and holds no judgment. “Your dear brother has found out about our arrangement, I presume.” 

You pull away slightly to stare up at Aemond. You drink in every plane of his face; those high cheekbones, his pretty lips, the silver hair that brushes the ridge of his jaw and the scar he hides. You want to absorb all of him. 

Aemond’s hands come to rest on your elbows, and then they slide all the way down your arms until he’s tenderly holding you by the wrists. He doesn’t give you a chance to answer before speaking more resolutely. “Did he hurt you?” 

“No — No, of course not,” you sniffle. Jace could be stubborn and fierce, but he would never lay a hand on you. “He was just being a brat. We got into an argument and he was ... he was mean.”

Aemond hums at that. “It must not have been too bad then. He is all bark and no bite,” he muses softly. Every syllable is gentle, each vowel soothing in its own right. He’s calm somehow.

It’s in these moments that you wish so deeply you could be like Aemond. Wish that you could stand your ground, despite wanting to run away. Wish that you could hold the barbs of someone’s anger in your palm and not get stung; not allow the sharp edges to slice under your skin and leave streams of blood in its wake. 

But you are not strong like him. 

With bated breath, you move to embrace Aemond once more, arms wrapping around his middle as you press your nose into the leather of his tunic. 

It doesn’t last long. 

Aemond leans into you, and then with both hands on your shoulders, gently tugs you away from his chest. You glance at him in confusion, and meet his gaze with an infantile glare. 

For a second you think he doesn’t want to hug you. That he’s about to chide you for being a big baby, for getting in a fight with your sibling and blowing things out of proportion. 

But then you quickly realize that he just wants to see your face. 

The truth is, Aemond doesn’t want you to hide in his arms. He doesn’t want you to bury your head into his chest and conceal your pain, or for you to dig your face into his clothes until each cheek is dry and you look composed again. 

He wants you to share every emotion with him openly, no matter how warped or ugly or bruised. 

Perhaps that’s what love is; recognizing someone's greatest vulnerability and still choosing to love them. 

It’s hard to place what emotion rests itself in Aemond’s eye after that, but whatever it is almost has you numb to how he’s holding both of your hands in his own. That is, until he trails a thumb over your knuckles. 

“Convince Jace, please,” you beg once more. The edges of your mouth start to turn downwards as you tear up again, and Aemond’s eye follows; he takes in your grief intently, and you are fully conscious of that fact. “Please. Show him you are worthy of my hand.” 

There’s a sort of surprise that swirls in his lilac gaze; however, his lips are in a straight line, his face nothing else but cold, and you can picture the war that rages inside his head. 

“I bear a hatred that could draw blood,” Aemond finally murmurs. “Those who do not deserve to be forgiven will not know my mercy. I will not betray my feelings to please others.”

“Try, Aemond. Please. If not for you and your sanity, do it for me.”

Aemond can only stare at you — his only love, his life, his breath of fresh air. The woman who he hopes will be his future wife despite your family’s distaste. He inhales deeply, chest rising and flattening the creases in his tunic, gaze roaming the tear-tracks on your face. And then he caves. 

But not before making a demand. 

“Do not cry, my love,” Aemond breathes. “It does not suit you.” 

And when you blink up at him so sweetly, nodding in a wordless vow, Aemond presses a kiss to the crown of your head. Then he kisses your left cheek, and the right, before slowly tracing his lips against your own. 

“Your body is mine,” He whispers into your parted mouth. “And I will find a way to claim it. They will have no choice but to accept me.” 

Aemond is a professional at pressing your buttons. It’d be a lie if you said it didn’t excite you; quickly, you capture his lips into a searing kiss. He returns the favor, knowing damn well that you want him, and yet he doesn’t tease in between kisses. He chooses tenderness over taunts just this once. 

The air is filled with a sentence unsaid: 

Touch my soul with warm words, and I shall do whatever you wish. 

[angstywaifu]

Happy Birthday To Me - Garrick Tavis x Reader

A/N: Couldn't not post a birthday themed fic on my birthday about my favourite Fourth Wing/Iron Flame man. Thank you to those who gave me ideas for it! And thank you for all the birthday wishes! Warnings: 18+, Smut (only a small amount and implied)

To everyone else today was just another day. Another day in the riders quadrant. Just the way I had intended it to be as I stretched out in my bed. I extend my hand out to find the space next to me empty and cold. I open my eyes to see Garrick who was there when I had fallen asleep was gone. Had been for some time apparently. I couldn’t help the slight hint of sadness that washed over me.

Garrick and I were just friends with benefits. Close friends with benefits. He didn’t always stay the night, most of the time opting to go back to his room to try keep our arrangement a secret. But part of my had hoped today he would be there when I woke up. On my birthday. A silly hope considering he didn’t know when my birthday was. No one in the quadrant did. I’d never had a good birthday when I was younger, my parents usually forgetting or claiming to be too busy. And once they had died with the end of the rebellion, I didn’t want someone else to disappoint me. So I never told anyone. The group of people I now considered close friends always asked. Nearly three years later none of them knew. But someone did. Out of the corner of my eye, sitting on my bedside table was a card leaning up against a small box, a dark green ribbon wrapped around it. My favourite colour. I push myself up, manoeuvring to sit in the spot Garrick had been in when I had fallen asleep last night. I reach for the box first, the child in me wanting to see what awaited inside seeing as I’d rarely gotten gifts on my birthday. I open it to reveal a black choker, with a small green gem hanging from it. It was beautiful. I had pointed it out a few weekends ago in town when we had all gone down on one of our rare days off. Meaning this could have only been from someone in our friend group who had gone that day.

We walked through the main road through town. Our voices and laughter echoing off the walls as Imogen tells us a story about Bodhi becoming a flustered mess around a girl he was interested in. Again. For someone who grew up around Xaden and Garrick who were the epitome of confidence, Bodhi was the complete opposite most of the time, and it made for a lot of moments like this. As we pass by one of the few jewellery stores in town, something catches my eye. I drift away from the group as they keep laughing at Imogen’s story. In the window was a choker made up of thin black leather cord , and hanging off it was a beautiful green gem. It was like nothing I had ever seen before. I must have been gone from the group longer than I had realised as a familiar presence joins me. I don’t have to look up to know its Garrick. His shadow easily fell over me without even trying. And his smell easily gave him away. The familiar scent of leather, musk and cinnamon I had grown so use to other the last few months. A smell that I swear was permanently on that side of the bed he always laid on.

”What you looking at?” He asks as his eyes scan the items in the store window.

I point my finger at the choker on display in the middle of the window display. “Just that choker. Nothing special.” I tell him.

”Why don’t you get it then? Seems you really like it.” He pushes. I really must have been standing here looking at it longer than I realised.

I shake my head. “I’ll just end up losing it in a challenge or something. Just thought it was pretty.”

With a final look at the choker, I smile up at Garrick before wandering back to the group standing a few feet behind us.

Had Garrick gotten this for me? If he had, he would have gotten it while we were there. But why wait till today to give it to me? I had never told him when my birthday was. Hadn’t uttered a single word about it since the day I had gotten here. There was no way he knew what today was. I place the box on the bed in front of me before grabbing the card that had been placed with the box. I open the card to find the very familiar scrawl I knew belonged to Garrick. I had sat next to him in nearly every class after he had befriended me in Gauntlet training back in first year. I would know his handwriting anywhere.

I promise you’ll never lose this. I’ll make sure of it.

Head to where we first met - Garrick

I move faster than I ever have before. Jumping out of bed and pulling on my uniform and brushing my hair in record time. I’m halfway across my room when I remember the necklace still in the box on my bed. I rush over and grab the necklace. My fingers fumbling nervously on the clasp as I try to secure it around my neck. After many failed attempts I manage to finally clasp it together. I can’t help the smile that forms on my lips as I catch my reflection in the mirror. The sun hitting the green gem on my neck just right, casting a subtle green glow around it. It was beautiful. I don’t even hesitate as my feet take me towards the gauntlet. Garrick and I had technically met before the training sessions had started. We we’re in the same squad. But until gauntlet training had started, we had never uttered a single word to each other. Not even a hello. And as I round the corner into the gauntlet I know my gut feeling was right. Exactly where we had said our first words, had our first interaction say another box with a green bow. Right where Garrick had saved me from falling to my death.

I didn’t have enough momentum. My footwork was all wrong as my body jerked forward on the third last post. I was falling and I was going to die. I close my eyes so I don’t see it coming. Don’t have to watch my death come to me. But suddenly I’m not falling forward. The wind rushing around me gone. Instead I’m swinging back up as something grasps my arm. I thud into something solid, before we both topple to the ground, rolling into the next obstacle. I lie there in shock, my eyes still shut. There was no way I hadn’t died. My mind was playing tricks on me. It had to be. But a deep voice pulls me from my thoughts and has me opening my eyes.

”Hey, are you ok?”

I open my eyes to see the biggest cadet in our squad and probably the entire quadrant looking down at me. Worry etched on their face and in their hazel eyes. Still in shock from almost dying all I can do is nod my head. Clearly he senses I’m still in shock as he grasps my hands and pulls me up with him. I barely reach his shoulder as we both stand on the small landing. The landing I was very close to not being on if it wasn’t for Garrick. Who I could have sworn was half way up the next obstacle as I started mine. He should have cleared it by the time I had started to fall. He should have easily cleared it by then.

”Think you can make it up the next one?” Garrick’s question pulling me from my thoughts.

I turn to look at the upwards climb we would have to make. Something I could easily do. “Yeah, I think I can manage that.”

”Good. I’m Garrick by the way.” He holds his hand out to me.

I grasp it, his hand dwarfing mine instantly. “I’m Y/N.”

This time I had easily made it across the posts. Right over to the box on the small landing. I kneel in front of it, pulling off the green bow. Inside was a wooden carving of my green dragon. A wooden carving I knew Liam Mairi had done. I had seen him making carvings for some of the other riders. And I had dropped hints multiple times I would love one of my dragon. He kept telling me he would get to mine. But I had a feeling mine had been done for a while as I had only started asking recently. Underneath the wooden carving is another note from Garrick.

I’m glad I caught you that day. Even though I didn’t know you, I hate to think how my life would have turned out if I hadn’t.

Meet me where it first happened - Garrick

I can’t help the smile that breaks out on my face as I read his note, or the way my heart beat increases ever so slightly. The others had always joked I brought out the best in Garrick from that day onwards. I had to take their word for it, as Garrick had never changed in my eyes. He had always acted the same around me. I turn and climb up the last of the Gauntlet. Thank god once we cleared this on presentation day we didn’t have to do this to get up to the flight field every single time. Even with it being far easier now than it was back in first year. As I pull my self over the top I head straight for the stairs to take me back down to the quadrant. The only place my mind went to with the words ‘meet me where it first happened’ was his room. So that’s where I went.

”F-fuck, Garrick.” I practically moan.

Garrick’s hands grip my thighs tightly, keeping me firmly seated on his face. His tongue licking slowly over me, before wrapping his lips around my clit. My hands gripping his head board tightly as my body trembles and my toes curl. Garrick’s name was tumbling from my lips with every stroke. I gasp out loudly as his tongue probes my entrance, Garrick’s hands gripping my thighs tightly in response. I feel his groan rumble through me as I grind down on his face, his nose grazing my clit, a loud moan escaping me again. One of his hands moves from my thigh to firmly grasp me ass, encouraging me to move back and forth. I whimper as he removes his lips from me, earning a chuckle from Garrick. I had been so hesitant to do this, and now here I was whimpering at the loss. But he quickly replaces the loss with his fingers. I instantly clamp around them, head rolling back in pleasure.

”Fuck Y/N, you look so pretty like this. Way better than I ever imagined.” His voice dropping an octave lower somehow. “Look at you coming undone on just my fingers and tongue.”

All I can do is moan and whimper in response as he adds another finger, curling them inside me. I nearly collapse at the feeling. Garrick and I had barely started and he already had me falling apart on top of him. As Garrick sucks on my clit again, my whole body starts shaking, my climax quickly approaching.

”That’s it sweetheart. Let go. Come apart on my fingers.” He mumbles against me.

And I do. Hard and loud as I moan and scream his name.

My hand hovers over the handle to Garrick’s room, shaking slightly as my heart beats loudly and fast in my chest. The green bow on the handle telling me I was in the right spot. Meaning Garrick was most likely inside based off the wording of his note. On the other side I pick the faint sounds of someone pacing back and forth. Was Garrick nervous? Garrick who I had never seen look phased or scared of anything in the time we had been here. Yet hear I was listening to his pacing back and forth. I suck in a deep breathe and turn the handle and push open the door. Garrick who was pacing towards the other side of the room turns quickly and looks at me. A smile gracing his lips as his eyes lower to the choker still clasped around my neck. I look around the room, and situated on the desk is a cupcake from one of the bakeries in the local town with green icing on top. Next to it what looks to be a book with some slim boxes stacked on top, secured together with another one of the green bows. Garrick had known today was my birthday. There was no denying it.

”How did you know?” I ask him as I walk over to the desk, Garrick standing behind me and placing a hand on the small of my back.

”Lets just say I have my ways.” He says with a chuckle. I don’t have to turn to see the smirk that will be on his face.

”What ways? I’ve never told anyone here when my birthday was.” I tell him as I undo the bow holding the book and boxes together.

Garrick watches silently as I open the first box. Inside was a new set of daggers. Tyrrish runes decorated the handle. They were gorgeous. The next box held a new set of charcoals to go with the sketch book lying underneath.

”Being a section leader gives me access to information on all the cadets under me.” Cadets that included me as I was in his section. “I had also noticed over the last two years, that you always seemed off around this time of year. That something bothered you. So I already had my suspicions.”

”You didn’t have to do this.” I tell him as I turn and look at up him, trapping me between Garrick and the desk.

Garrick just smiles and reaches up and brushes some of my hair behind my ear, then resting his hand on my cheek. In my rush I hadn’t done my usual braid or bun, leaving it to hand loosely around my face. Something I knew drove Garrick crazy. He loved it when I’d let it down during our more intimate moments.

”I did. I needed to do this for you. Can’t have my girl hating her birthday.” He tells me softly.

Garrick was always good at keeping his emotions off his face. But his eyes always spoke what he was trying to hide. I could see the nervousness in them, the slight darting around my face to see how I would react.

”You’re girl? We’re just fr-”

”What if I wanted more? Wanted more than just some heated moments in each others beds. But kept convincing myself I couldn’t have more. What if I was stupid enough to fall for one of my closest friends.” He pleads, resting his forehead on mine.

”Good thing we’re both stupid then.” I say.

I briefly catch a smile on Garrick’s lips before they’re on my own. Our hands pulling at each others clothes as he guides us towards his bed, two piles ending up on the floor. I go to grab his hand to pull him down to the bed with me, but he smacks it away as he kneels in front of me, pulling me towards the edge of the bed.

”Today is all about you darling.” He says, his voice dropping an octave lower than normal, bringing out the husky tone that he knows I love.

I go to object, but my words are silenced by my moan as Garrick runs his tongue along my centre and pushes his fingers inside me. Happy birthday to me.

[squishytenya]

choose your own path <3

pairings - readers choice x gn!reader

warnings - forced proximity quirk, crying, quirk accidents, exact warnings on each character post (each character's chapter will be linked at the bottom of this post when they are written)

welcome! I've kind of always wanted to do one of these so here it is! it's kind of soulmate au inspired and each of the choices is based on a popular romance novel trope :) hope you enjoy

I have a few specific characters planned for each imagine but if there is any you would like to see - lmk and I'll write it <3

The dust flew up around your face, sitting thick in your throat and causing you to force out a cough. This was certainly not how this was supposed to go. A simple patrol, one of your first since becoming a pro, it was supposed to be nothing more than dealing with a few muggings. Instead, the shrill cries of a young girl had pierced through the night. You and your partner had shared matching looks and flown down the street as fast as you could towards the noise with your hearts racing.

As it turns out, it was not the girl you would be saving. The screaming changed as you grew closer - morphing from fear to frustration and a hint of anger. Well, as much anger as a tiny five year olds body could muster. She was running frantically around, tripping on the rubble that she had somehow pulled up from the ground with her tantrum. And she seemed to be… tapping people? Not slapping per say but placing her tiny hands on people anywhere she could reach. Every time she placed her small palm on another person's skin, her little shoulders dropped in what you realised was relief. Unfortunately, the people she had tapped in her frenzy seemed to absorb the pain. Within seconds, almost everyone in the crowd around her had been sent to their knees, groaning in agony.

You shared a look with your partner and nodded at them - stepping towards the volatile child. 

“Hey sweetie, it’s okay” you attempted to comfort her apprehensively. 

 “what’s your name?”

There was no indication, to your shock, that anyone else had tried to even converse with the toddler. The way she froze in her movements caused you to step back, until she turned her gaze on you and her brown eyes filled with tears. Her trembling body made your heart ache. Obviously, this was some kind of late quirk manifestation that had taken the poor girl by surprise. Yet, you still couldn’t understand why nobody seemed to want to get near her. 

That was, until you noticed a pale yellow glow emitting from her palms. The young girl seemed to be just as panicked at this as you felt and started to move, as if to shake the glow from her palms. Her futile attempts only caused her breathing to pick up its pace again and she stumbled.

“We can help you” you spoke soft and slow, gesturing to your partner, “you just gotta come here okay? Tell me what's got you so worked up”

The brunette girl sniffled, rubbing her face with her glowing palms. Pain curled in your chest at the sorry sight. Reaching forward, you moved your hand onto her shoulder and gripped it softly. It had been taught to you in training that younger civilians reacted well to physical contact, as it often reminded them of their parents. Not that you had paid much attention in that section of class, but you did remember some useful things. You would have to thank midnight for the tip once this is over. 

Wailing, she curled in on herself and her head rolled back. Tear-filled eyes bore into yours and she started stuttering out apologies, the soft yellow glow growing more intense. The light emitting from her hands seemed to heat up as it intensified and the air around it started wobbling like the sun on a hot day. Squinting, you moved towards her to attempt to stop her touching another person. It didn’t seem to cause too many issues but you needed to keep the public away from the girl’s grasp until you knew the full extent of her quirk. 

“I’m sorry” she screamed, in obvious pain now

“Sorry- I can’t stop it! It hurts! Want it to stop” 

Before you could stop her, she reached towards your arm with her glowing fingertips outstretched. Your partner let out a shocked sound and shot forward towards the two of you. 

It was no use, her tiny hand closed around the exposed skin of your wrist. 

And… nothing. 

Reaching behind you, you waved your frantic partner off. It wasn’t that bad, just a bit of heat. Certainly, the civilians around you were just reacting dramatically to the heat emanating from the little girl's hands. A slight tingle, sure, but nothing more than that. Honestly, you didn’t know what the other people in the area were making such a fuss about. It could probably be explained as a small energy quirk mixed with growing pains. It happened to the best of you. 

You smiled warmly at the young girl again, despite your heart pounding in your chest. Oddly enough, light and that warping heat still remained on the hand that hadn’t touched you. Hmm you thought, maybe the quirk separates in her body? The girl's squirming seemed to confirm your theory - not quite the agonising pain you had witnessed a few seconds earlier, but definitely not comfortable to her. 

Once again, your partner stood beside you and quirked an eyebrow. You shrugged in response. 

“I don’t know what the big deal is, it was a bit warm but that’s pretty much it” you explained. 

“No!” the young girl in your arms protested, “it doesn’t work like that-”

Your partner, shocked by her sudden outburst, moved closer to you. His action seemed to shock the girl huddled in your embrace and she reached towards his chest with her glowing hand. The entirety of her hand pushed against his chest, sending him reeling back at her surprising strength. Your eyebrows almost hit your hairline. That was certainly ammo to tease him with later on in your patrol, you thought to yourself. 

Blinking, you set her on the ground. The warmth emanating from your wrist sharpened, causing you to clench your fist and shake your arm. The attempt to lessen the feeling proved futile. Burning sensations travelled up your arm, engulfing the rest of your body in the curling flame. You grunted as the scorching heat flowed through you like a flow of lava in your veins. Gripping your chest now as the burning seemed to swirl around your heart, you glanced over to your patrol partner and observed he seemed to be fairing the same way you did. 

Desperately, you reached for your radio, dropping the now hysterical girl to the ground as gently as you could. Murmurs picked up in the crowd around you, obviously shocked at the immediate effect of the quirk. The metal of your radio was a cool relief against your feverish skin. 

You gasped when the receiver crackled to life. 

“Help requested” you almost sobbed, “two down in the market square… there’s been a quirk incident - we need help”

Bursts of the flame sensation flickered up to your head at this point. It felt like your whole torso had been set on fire. Sinking to your knees, you grasped your head in your hands and bit back a scream. Your chest heaved under the strain. Frantically, you gestured for the crowd to move away from you and your partner but made no attempt to move closer across to him.

“Ayami!” came a frantic voice from across the clearing. 

“Mommy!”

“Sweetie, what have you done?”

“It was an accident” the little girl was in tears now and you reached to comfort her in earnest. 

Not getting far, you clutched your hand to your chest as the flame feeling engulfed your eyes - spreading bright yellow into your vision. The young girl's cries were still ringing in your head as your eyes closed and you hit the cold ground. 

-

Your head was swimming. There was no way of telling how long you had been out but your body held the same exhaustion as it did when a fever had just broken. The light above you was industrial and way, way too bright for your very tired eyes. 

“They’re awake”

You grunted. 

“Wish I wasn’t”

A familiar snort rang out across the space you were in. 

“At least we can rule out a change in their charming personality.”

“Fuck off Katsuki” 

You raised your middle finger in the general direction of the comment, eliciting a snort once again. You supposed you had to get up and face the world at some point. If you were safely in hospital, it most likely meant that the young girl from the night before had been contained. 

“The girl,” you murmured, “she okay?”

The person next to you (mina, you assumed by the smell of her perfume) kissed their teeth - a less than comforting noise. You groaned again, this would probably require way more paperwork from you than you were prepared to do right now.

“Yeah, she’s fine - the old lady’s got something to tell you though.”

–

“You’re shitting me right?”

Recovery girl cast you a look over the rim of her glasses. Cringing, you began to apologise to the smaller woman but she cut you off. 

“I’m sorry to tell you, but you will have to remain close to him” she explained, “we don’t know when the quirks effect will wear off, none of the civilians are back to normal yet”

You huffed, crossing your arms against your chest. This was just your luck really, exactly what you needed after a week of night shift patrols and shitty takeout dinner. The poor girl in the street had some kind of tethering quirk, none of the civilians hit had been able to separate themselves from each other for longer than five minutes without that burning sensation coming back full force. Each time she touched someone with one other hands, whoever she touched with the other was stuck with them until someone could figure this quirk out. 

They’d been essentially sorted into pairs by the girl’s quirk. Like the game snap! Your brain helpfully supplied. The maximum distance they could go without hurting each other was a mere 8 feet. 

8 feet was not enough space for you. 

You and your partner had only patrolled together twice and now you were stuck within a room's distance of him the whole time. Sure, it was better than whatever that feeling was - but you were less than happy about it. 

Knock knock. 

Speak of the devil and he appears. You knew he was due to come in because the warm, mildly painful, tingle had started up again on the same wrist. Brilliant, this is my life now. 

You looked up and made eye contact with your partner… 

bakugou part one // part two

[thelesbododo]

This is a headcanon circulating around a sensitive topic and one that you may not agree with so if you don't want to read it please scroll.

This headcanon revolves around the character Osamu Dazai and the concept of sexual assault

I believe that Dazai was sexually assaulted as a child

This has nothing to do with Mori and takes place long before they even meet

While it is true we know little to nothing of BSD Dazai's past, it is also true that it is highly likely the Irl author and his No Longer Human counterpart was SA'd

There are two specific pieces of writing are evidence of this

"My true nature, however, was one diametrically opposed to the role of the mischievous imp. Already by that time I had been taught a lamentable thing by the maids and manservants; I was being corrupted. I now think that to perpetrate such a thing on a small child is the ugliest, vilest, cruelest crime a human being can commit. But I endured it. I even felt as if it enabled me to see one more particular aspect of human beings. I smiled in my weakness. If I had formed the habit of telling the truth I might perhaps have been able to confide unabashedly to my father or mother about the crime, but I could not fully understand even my own parents. To appeal for help to any human being - I could expect nothing from that expedient. Supposing I complained to my father or my mother, or to the police, the government - I wondered if in the end I would not be argued into silence by someone in good graces with the world, by the excuses of which the world approved.It is only too obvious that favoritism inevitably exists: it would have been useless to complain to human beings. So I said nothing of the truth. I felt I had no choice but to endure whatever came my way and go on playing the clown"

- No Longer Human

"I ceased being a child soon after entering grade school. It was then that my younger brother’s nurse taught me something that took my breath away. It was a beautiful summer day, and the grass by the vacant house out back had grown tall and dense. I must have been about seven, and my brother’s nurse could not have been more than thirteen or fourteen. My brother was three years younger than I, and the nurse shooed him off. She said, ‘Go get some leaf grass’ - that’s our word for clover back home. Then she added, ‘And make sure it’s got four leaves too.’ After he left, she put her arms around me and we started rolling around in the tall grass. Thereafter we would play our secret little game in the storehouse or in one of the closets."

- Memories

Both No Longer Human and Memories are semi-autobiographies, meaning they're somewhat based in truth

I can't speak from experience but SA has a big effect on the lives of the survivors

Some of thes effects include;

Sleeping or Eating disorders

Dazai canoniclly has issues sleeping and there are scenes that imply he has issues with and/or doesn't see the point in eating, at one point saying that it is "so much trouble"

Nightmares

There is a specific scene within one kf the light novels where Kunikida asks if Dazai has nightmares.

(Unfortunately I can't find the exact moment so I can't quote it so if anyone can find it please let me know)

Self-hatred

It might not be clearly stated that he hates himself but ay the same time its rather clear that he does

Suicidal thoughts or self-harm

He is a suicidal maniac

Riskier sexual behaviors such as having many partners

He canoniclly has had quite a lot of lovers

Substance abuse

The one scene we see of his apartment we see that there is more alcohol than furniture (it's also a popular hc that Dazai smokes which makes sense considering his past with the pm and that irl author smoked)

Another moment to mention was when he seduced the nurse (which technically counted as SA too but that's not the point of this)

I'm probably gonna end it here because it's late and I'm tired but anyone willing to add or correct anything please go ahead and I hoped you enjoyed my hc

[youngstarfishphilosopher]

PLATONIC! J-SQUAD X CHILD READER (HEADCANNONS)

Warnings ⚠️: IMPLIED CHILD ABUSE, METIONS OF MURDER, ACTUAL MURDER, HYPNOTISM, THREATS, KIDNAPPING, POSSESIVE BEHAVIOR, IMPLIED USE OF FEAR TOXIN

JEROME VALESKA:

Welp, good luck, my friend

- You would be one of his hostages who he was planning to kill. Patiently waiting your turn for your fun death. You had an abusive / less than kind family member with you at the time who had forced you to go there.

- When realizing that you two two were a little family unit, he decides to amuse himself a little.

- " Hey, hey you!" He would yell at one of his goons. " Tye them up to that uhhhh. . . That spinning wheel thing. And bring the kid over to me."

- Tying your family member up, Jerome places one of three throwing daggers in your hand( crowching down if you're small) while kind of just coaching you on how to throw them.

- What a surprise for him when not only do you do it without hesitation, but with a small smile on your face.

- That's when he goes, " Alright, change of plans, I like this kid." And immediately takes you under his wing

- There is never a dull moment with this man. There are plenty of bloody and horrific ones, sure. But never dull.

- Will make you kill the rest of your family members or do it himself if you can't. You're his now, and he doesn't need anyone trying to get in the way of that or distracting you.

- Sees himself as more of a mentor figure to you rather than an actual parent. But if you do end up calling him dad, he's not complaining.

- Takes you along with him for many of his usual, murderous antics. No matter how old you are, even if you are on the much younger side. "Best to teach them young," He would say.

- Praises you a lot whenever you decided to join in on the fun and always makes either his goons or his hostages cheer for you.

-If you're more on the socially anxious side, he'll try to put you in the spotlight less often and leave your killings as just some private family bonding time.

- This man CANNOT cook. He would burn whatever place he was staying out down to the ground if he tried.

- Gives you a lot of freedom to have fun and do whatever, but don't think that means you're allowed to leave or disobey him. You're still his protégé and need to listen to what he says.

- If you are on the younger side, that list of freedoms would be much shorter.

- He would want you around his vicinity or next to him and would make some of his goons keep an eye on you if he was busy with something.

- Lots of physical affection and inside jokes from this guy.

- All in all: Getting a child wasn't something Jerome had on his bucket list. But he's not really complaining.

JERVIS TETCH:

- To say this man is obsessive is the understatement of the century

- Spots you in the crowd at one of his performances and chooses you as his willing participant

- You might as well forget your parents now, because he'll have already hypnotized them to walk into traffic or jump off a building.

- Unlike the other two, Jervis will expect for you to see him as your dad.

- Will plan extravagant teaparties with all your favorite teas and sweets. And if you're not a sweets kind of person, then he'll put out more savory stuff like sandwiches as soupes.

- Hope you like fancy outfits, because you'll be wearing a lot of them. But don't worry, he'll try to find some that you're comfortable in.

- Doesn't give you a whole lot of freedom. Especially if you're on the much younger side.

- He'll also just randomly picks you up and carry you around with him if you're small enough for him to do so.

- Will not hesitate to hypnotize you and tie you up if he feels it is necessary. So you nest behave

- Usually reads bedtime stories to you, no matter how old you are.

- In conclusion, this man is obsessive and delusional. So just sit back, relax, and let your new papa take care of you.

JONATHAN CRANE:

-Well, this is rather unexpected. He never really saw himself taking care of a child

- He met you at Arkham: His cell next to yours. And you two would talk through the walls whenever a day was especially boring.

- After a while, he warmed up rather well to you. He starts to see you more as family in a way and immediately gets you out of your cell when a breakout in the asylum starts.

- Keeps you far away from your previous family members if you have any. He wouldn't kill them the first time per-say, just . . . Scare them away.

- The second time, he would be much less merciful. They had their chance and should have listened.

- He doesn't let you get too close to him when he's working on his projects in fear of you accidently getting hurt. But if you're an older teenager, he would ask if you would like to try and face your fears.

- He wouldn't force anything, though.

- You see him more as an older brother type figure rather than a parental one.

- Agian, if you are older, he doesn't really let you participate in his antics and usually lets you stay home if he trusts you. But will just bring you along to watch if you're much younger.

- A decent cook all things considered. Not the best by any means, but at least it's not a burt piece of charcoal.

- Will sit and talk with you whenever you need it. He's a pretty good listener.

- He can also get really protective a times, no matter what age you are, and will not hesitate to fear gas somebody.

- Not the best when it comes to physical affection. But will give you some if you want it.

- Although you entering his life was unexpected. Jonathan has found himself enjoying your company a lot more than he ever thought he would. It's probably the only thing good that ever came from being trapped in arkham.

[damianbugs]

i spoke about this briefly before, and i think i have my thoughts more collected now to develop on it; i feel like comics which show bruce comforting his child self in flashbacks of the wayne murder in crime alley understand the purpose of batman a lot more than the ones that have him talking to his parents.

if you've been keeping up with recent batman comics, then you'll notice a theme of bruce getting the chance to talk to his younger self. the important part though, is that it is not because of time travel or some detached third party force — it's the young bruce in batman's head.

it's the him hidden behind the black door in his mind when he's fighting his nightmares —

Batman Knight Terrors #2, 2023. written by Joshua Williamson.

— and it's the him tucked away in corner of his mind after being drugged and tortured with his greatest fears.

Detective Comics #1075, 2023. written by Ram V.

after experiencing something traumatic, the one bruce sees suffering from it isn't himself, but the young bruce wayne in the alley. because at the end of the day, every hurt circles back to that night, to that boy, that he can't save no matter how hard he tries — because that boy never left the pool of blood he was sitting in.

i think people often attribute the existence of batman as something created for his parents. to avenge them, or to be the symbol that could have saved their life had he existed before, to stop anyone else from being killed in the same way. there's some truth to that, however, to me, the answer is a little more selfish.

i think it has always been for himself, but not the him now, but the him that is still stuck in that alleyway, waiting over his parents dead bodies. batman is a symbol of hope and reformation and justice, but at its core, batman is what saved bruce wayne.

as a result, the panels above have a very different feel to say, this moment when bruce sees an illusion of his parents in Superman/Batman #56, 2009. written by Michael Green and Mike Johnson.

it's an emotional moment for sure, but it didn't quite speak to me the same way this absolutely phenomenal moment did in Batman: Blind Justice, 1989. written by Sam Hamm.

of course this moment is a lot more cynical in how bruce uses batman to cope with his guilt, while the other moments focus on batman providing young bruce with the hope to continue that he isn't alone — the sentiment of batman being the one to pick him up from the floor and lead him away from the scene in a shared motif.

it reminds me of that one discussion that batman is a victims power fantasy. his own fantasy! because bruce has — in order to have a semblance of control over himself — separated himself from this event that it is a completely different child at the scene of the crime. it's this fact that let's him reach down, hold the boy's hand and tell him everything will be okay.

this bruce wayne is a child, his child, gotham's child, thomas and martha wayne's child, an orphan to protect.

batman was made for children like bruce wayne, to stop them from becoming like him and for them to hold onto when it does — because batman is still trying to fix a problem that has an endless hole. he can never reconcile this trauma and let the boy in the alley leave, because that's not what batman was made for.

batman was made to protect the little boy, and in order to do that, he must remain in that alley.

there's still a bruce wayne who had to grow up, who learned to fight and love and lose again and again, a bruce wayne who becomes batman. a batman who then, tries effortlessly to fix problems and save people, who goes out everynight because if he doesn't, then that boy in the alley is left there for nothing.

then there comes a moment where he falls through the cracks and he's face to face with the child who can't leave and can't grow up and knows nothing but loneliness and grief — and batman gets to tell this child that life becomes more than just this alley.

the child is happy, if even for a moment, that batman is there. that's what batman is for.

[goldenocie]

Who are all of Ocies kids and who are their biological fathers?

This has been asked a lot so I'm gonna go on record to say this is the last time I'm answering logistic questions on the New Seaside kids, i.e who their dads are, how they were born, how parenting works with them. You guys are more than welcome to send other asks about them! I'll try to answer any and all logistics here. Caly is genetically Violets, Argo and TJ are genetically Jerry's. Despite this, they don't treat either differently and they all generally accept that Kai, Violet, and Jerry are their parents. Kai gets the generalized mom names, Violet is "dad", and Jerry is "papa". I get this ask a lot and it's funny to me but they were made the natural way. Kai is able to essentially change her organs around and I hope to god y'all know the rest about how babies are made cause I'm not telling you /lh

They all see Oscar as a big brother and bother the hell out of him at any opportunity. Anyone else from the grove is likely considered a close family friend, aunt, or uncle.

Don't really know exact ages, I just sorta see them as older child, younger child, and toddler ages. So i guess approx like 11, 6, and 3

fun little thing but I like to think Calypso didn't inherit Violet's wings but she still liked flying and would try to jump off of stuff like Oscar did.

[wangxianficrecs]

A Brother's Choice by Admiranda

A Brother's Choice

by Admiranda (@admirableadmiranda)

M, 8k, Wen Ning & Wei Wuxian

Summary: Once upon a time, there was a genius and his friend, who thought more fondly of each other than friend could cover, although they had yet to admit it to each other. The genius, thinking wistfully on days when they were younger, had been struck by an idea then. After some experimentation he had created a talisman that essentially created a door to another time, where one longing to see a long lost face could go and see that person again, and return back at the end. After all, he was not interested in reliving those long, painful years even if he could change some things for the better. Once had been more than enough. He offered it to his dear friend first, thinking of a young woman who had inspired and sheltered them both in times of turmoil “Wen Ning, you could see your sister again! You should get the chance first, then you can tell me if it's safe for me and Lan Zhan to use it as well.” So he had taken the chance, to wander back many many years, to when they were children, and the world was simpler. But he didn't tell Wei Wuxian of all of his plans back in this time. Kay's comments: This story was much darker than I expected when I started reading it! Wen Ning travels back in time and decides to change Wei Wuxian's life for the better and he won't let anyone get into his way, neither animals nor humans... I actually really liked how it explored Wen Ning's dedication to his goal and how he won't let anything get in his way and his and Wei Wuxian's relationship as brother. Little A-Ying was extremely adorable as well (though he has seen some shit). Excerpt: Wei-gongzi hadn't told him how timid he must have been on the street, there was almost none of the confidence he associated with his friend. “They were going to hurt you, so I stopped them.” he said, keeping his voice slow and mellow. A shiver racked his friend's small body and he reconsidered a little as to whether the stammering was from nervousness. “Are you cold?” The boy nodded, his eyes wary and hopeful. He did his best to smile, but it was hard to move those muscles on his face enough to make it comforting. “My cloak is very strong and warm, it will help,” he knelt down slowly and shook the gathering snow off of it. Wei Ying nodded, but hung back still, looking over him as he made up his mind on what to do. He searched his memory for the bits of his past that Wei-gongzi would sometimes let slip here and there, never all at once, but like scattered pearls on the ocean floor, easy to miss if you weren't listening closely. “It's okay A-Ying, I want to help.” At the sound of his name, Wei Ying lit up like the sunrise, a child's version of the smile he was used to spreading across his face. “Did you know my parents?” he asked even as he came forwards to be wrapped up in the cloak. Immediately Wen Ning was aware of how little it was just to do that, but he hadn't thought about all the things he would need to make sure that a little Wei-gongzi would need before he decided on the best place to leave him.

pov wen ning, canon divergence, time travel, time travel fix-it, time travelling wen ninbg, minor character death, burial mounds ensemble as family, post-canon, pre-canon, blood and violence, families of choice, wei wuxian isn't adopted by the jiangs, wei wuxian & wen ning & wen qing, yiling siblings, animal death, dark wen ning, murder

~*~

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[myoddessy]

hellooo congrats on 2k!! not sure how to phrase this request but some 🍰 please for harry/w2s. maybe about being seen in the backgrounds of his videos/features on other videos sometimes? or the things he mentions about you on camera if thats not too much trouble! congrats again! and if head cannons are easier thats great too

thank you so much! im a bit rusty when it comes to blurbs so i hope this is okay 💞

it was no secret that harry had found his forever in you, anyone who was anyone could see the shift in his smile or the glint in his eye when you caught his eye. be it a fleeting look of shyness on your instagram story or tiktok, a short clip of your face popping into the background of a video, or even a flash of your face in a pop-up add as he scrolled through social media.

it was as if the boldness and unabashed bravery of wroetoshaw melted away for a split second, and the world saw harry for who he truly was; a boy in love.

now, with a love that open and observed, privacy was a luxury you rarely found yourself in possession of. whether someone tweeted that you were on a date down a quiet city street, or the detectives of your fanbases debunked every picture, comment, and clip about either if you until you were certain they knew more about your relationship than you did. and as grateful as you were that there was such a wide reception of love for you and harry, the lack of secrecy lead to you cowering away from video cameos so that any moments you did managed to share stayed between you and you only.

that being said, you couldn't honestly say you hadn't fallen down a rabbit hole of your w2s and sidemen pop-ups before.

your favourite was during the sidemen become parents for 24 hours challenge, when harry was in a murderous state and little baby nathaniel would not stop screaming, ethan caught a glimpse of you walking down shop street and yelled for you just in time for harry to release the child from a chokehold.

with a confused smile and hands stuffed in the pockets of your northface puffer, you walked towards them, unaware to the cameras panning in on the softened eyes and uncontrollable smile of your boyfriend.

"well, lads. you alright?" you asked, voice trailing off to a higher pitch when you saw the screaming doll dangling from harry's grip, his hand wrapped loosely around its ankle.

"doing just fine, birthed a beautiful baby boy. bog couldn't be happier." ethan joked, hand clapping down on the younger man's shoulder. "he won't shut up." harry said, blowing out an exhausted sigh. "help us, please." you sucked in a harsh breath, toying with them. "dunno if i shouldn't, wouldn't that be breaking challenge rules?"

"i will literally pay you." harry shook the baby's leg in your face, emphasising his pain.

"just do the washing up for the rest of the week and we're sorted."

"deal."

"hand me over the child then."

ethan's focus bounced between you and harry like he was watching this unfold in wimbledon, unsure of who to look at throughout the exchange, before settling with staring at the camera, blinking slowly as harry handed you nathaniel. you bounced the doll in your arms, shushing him and swaying slowly, your hand running up and down his back as if it were real and second nature.

would never say it, nor did he think he even could, but a sense of urgency washed over him in that moment. like he wouldn't breathe until he saw it again, except real, with your child—his child. with a shake of his head, the thought dispelled before his cheeks got too red, but anyone could see the far-off look in his eye, and he worried that anyone who looked too close would see the reflection of domesticity behind it.

in the span of a minute, you'd gotten nathaniel to calm down, and with a laugh of good luck and a happy wave, you left before any other sidemen could approach and see them getting outside assistance.

over the years, the clip had been reposted, edited, referenced by the world as the love they yearned to see in their partner's eyes, and you loved every second of it. now, with two diamonds weighing your left hand down and a bump in your stomach, you sat before the camera once more, this time with purpose. this time to confirm to everyone that the dream harry held in his eyes three years ago was finally upon him.

his forever was set in stone.

[dreamwritersworld]

Disconnected… part 2. (sully family x reader)

“this is what you’ve made me become.”

…and so Jake watched his creation, the daughter he now realizes he damaged. His body ran cold as he watched her pick up a tree branch…and then he followed her chilling whistles.

Y/n thought that was all…that she got all the soldiers, until she heard rustles in the woods. There was no hesitation in the her shot. The teenage girl kicked the gun away from the soldier arms, looked directly into her fathers eyes..

“This. Is what we do to get rid of the bad people. It shouldn’t take that long for you to realize how badly you protect this clan and your family.”

Her eyes were cold and black, the pleads from the man didn’t stop.

“You can breath, you can blink, you can cry….Eywa, you already are. You’re going to be stuck in that broken shell of a body forever.”

Then she cut the man’s vision clear bashing his head in with the thick tree branch.

“Y/n…Y/n s-stop…please. You killed those soldiers, and did more than killing to Quaritch Y/n, you didn’t even blink.”

“You know why I did it? I did it because I wanted to.”

“Don’t be stupid Y/n please. You can fool yourself and everyone else! But you can’t fool me! What happened to you? Because this isn’t you..”

“How would you know about me.”

The built up tension…over years of being locked away and pushed from her family…she aimed the gun to her siblings and mother who came in…the loudness and facial expression towards Y/n felt so unfamiliar…uncomfortable. They never looked at her..and now? Now they see her.

Neytiri’s eyes and hears rang…all she could hear were her mothers warning on Y/n’s behavior…now, she regretted ignoring her persistence on fixing Y/n. Mo’at said she was a monster but now…Neytiri was convinced, Y/n was the devil.

The Erie silence scared her…something she found so peaceful was now so scary. Y/n took her gun and ran through the woods hoping to just breathe for a moment.

It had been hours and everyone went off looking for her…Mo’at especially. Her poor grandchild couldn’t stand being with anyone because that’s how Jake made her, he made her used to being by herself. He gave her all the wrong traits…angry, aggressive, defensive, closed off and…sad.

*Flashback*

Jake made Y/n so stressed that the simplest thing set her off.

Y/n walked away angrily from training, having a rough day of archery…Neteyam could hear his younger sibling exhaling heavily.

“What happened?”

“All my shots were bad, all of them. Every single one.”

Neteyam turned around to the spots Y/n was supposed to aim, masking a surprised face towards the slightly off target aims, no it wasn’t in the exact center but it was almost there, still a good shot.

…it was always all too wrong for Y/n.

*

The frustrating memory came to an end when Y/n heard someone approaching.

“…Y/n! Please come back home! This is- it’s just not ok. The decisions your making right now aren’t wise, especially at this hour-“

“You think I’m some idiot! Well I didn’t ask to be made! I didn’t ask to be torn apart and put back together over and over! To turn into some…some monster!”

“Y/n…“

“No! No don’t say I’m wrong! You don’t get to say that! I spent hours on end training just so I could be perfect for him! For my own father..but I wasn’t! I proved myself over and over and over and over and over and over-“

“..ok Y/n I get it now-“

“No you don’t!”

“…I know you act like you’re the meanest and strongest but you’re actually the most scared of all…I know that you push anyone’s who’s willing to put up with you, cause just a little bit of love reminds you of how big and empty that hole inside you actually is.”

“Stop!”

“I know you feel like no one cares about you!…I know who you are Y/n!…because you were me. My parents always pushed on me to be the greatest tsahik..gave me much more harder time than a child can bare..so please Y/n realize that you’re ok now. I’m here”

For a moment..silence stood between the two…and the girl who Mo’at hoped would get better..broke down, into her grandmother’s arms.

“You were born into a family that doesn’t always appreciate you, but one day things are going to be very different..”

Mo’at placed a sleeping remedy on Y/n’s face hoping to buy her grandchild a good rest and time before the storm. Y/n softly fell asleep into her grandmothers arms. The most emotional yet beautiful sight Moat had ever seen…the child who was always overseen was now peacefully shedding tears while sleeping…it hurt her looking at the way Y/n was fully on guard still. Not once did her hand lose grip on her gun, and her body remained tense.

!💓!

There will be one more part to this! I’m so sorry for the major delay, i haven’t had any time to write and i hope this is good! Sorry for it being short but I’d also love if you guys send in requests for Y/n’s ending in this 💓

Tag list: @noodlesfics @eywas-heir @itshype @zatarias-pandora @yeosxxx @arminsgfloll l @tsireyak @neteyamforlife @aimsro @elegantkidfansoul l @goodiesinthecloset21 @nikotokitaswife @bucky1235 @detectivesparrow @kikosaurscave @ssc7514 @simp-erformarvelwomen @eirianna @ambria @im-in-a-pansexual-panik @lv9su @luciddasher @dakotali @httpjiikook @tainted-artist4161 @fanboyluvr @bat1212 @ducks118 @midnightliacr @osakis-gf @briannalarae @thirsty4nonlivingmen @historygeekqueen @abbersreads @hoodiepandaninja16 @valovesyou @silentlyswimming @r3dc4ndy @onlytays @papichulo120627 @tsamiaxo @wwwellacom @dotheyevenknowmars @midgetpottermills @he110hon @hotdsstuff @heart-an0n @he110hon @go-river-flows

[janners]

Light

Sully family x daughter!reader

warnings : death, heavy angst..?, violence (if i miss anything tell me)

word count : 7.9k

a/n : This is my very first story that i’ve ever posted so it may be absolute shit but I hope you guys enjoy it. Please tell me if i’ve made any mistakes. Also there may be some plot holes that I haven’t noticed. If there is just ignore it lol

_______________________________________________________________________

Pure blinding light, that’s all you can see. An aching feeling within you surfaces as you slowly realise where you are. With Eywa…

19 years ago

“Y/N” Jake announces, his first born, his first daughter. A joyous day for both him and Neytiri, a gift sought from Eywa. The first light in their life, but what they didn’t know was how fast that light would fade within their lives.

_______________________________________________________________________

You were a bright child, fast learner as well. Being able to catch fish with your bare hands, showing it off to your father with the brightest smile. How that smile could brighten up anyone's day. You were adored by everyone in the clan with how enthusiastic you were and how positive you are in any given situation.

Only four years later came along your younger brother, Neteyam. Any chance that was given, you would hold him and just talk about how much you adore and cherish him. Neytiri being right there to witness these interactions gave her thoughts on how they could ever be deserving of such a blessed child.

As years pass by, Lo’ak and Kiri now being part of the family has Jake and Neytiri busy as ever. Though, where does that leave you? You are being left out, and held with more responsibility than ever before. Being the oldest sully child now became stressful and overwhelming. Once a carefree child, now trapped with responsibilities. Jake had given you the responsibility to watch over your siblings at all times and protect them at all costs. Only being 6 at the time, you didn’t fully understand why.

_______________________________________________________________________

Both Jake and Neytiri haven’t been the same parents you knew since the birth of Tuktirey. You don’t blame Tuk in any way with how your parents are now acting. You could only blame them for being hard on you no matter what you do. Throughout the years you had trained hard with no breaks. Becoming one of the most lethal warriors within the clan. Even with your parents knowing that, they still pay no attention to you. Even when you went through with your iknimaya, you didn’t get as much praise compared to when your other siblings had completed theirs. You still had strong bonds with your siblings especially with Lo’ak.

You and Lo’ak were always together, attached to the hip. You being the calm and collected child while Lo’ak was the “devil” child. You guys especially bonded over your difficulties in the family, you being the only one to really understand him. Though being older, you don’t rant to him but instead just listen and comfort him because that’s what a good older sister does.

Present

Jake is discussing plans about the raids now that the sky people have returned. You listen intently knowing that Jake expects the most from you. While listening Lo’ak nudges you with his elbow and whispers “psst y/n” you take a quick glance but focus back on the meeting but again he nudges harder, “sister pssst” you finally look at him “what do you want Lo’ak, father will skin us if he finds that we are not paying attention”

He just stares at you for a second before saying “nothing I just wanted to annoy you” with a smug smile on his face. You just roll your eyes with a faint smile.

“Lo’ak, Y/n, Neteyam, you three will be scouters alright? I better not see you guys on the ground at all, understand?” Jakes states with a stern face. You all nod, knowing if you retaliate it would only start an argument. The three of you are now flying and scouting in the air as the rest of the warriors raid the train. You hear Neteyam shout for Lo’ak which made you snap looking in their direction, just to see Lo’ak descending down towards the train. “I swear to eywa that I will not kill Lo’ak” you mumble under your breath. Spotting an aircraft you fly faster towards Lo’ak and Neteyam hoping to get them back to the sky before their father spots them. “Lo’ak, Neteyam, hurry your skxawng asses back into the air NOW”

Right as you finish speaking you see a missile coming towards you all. You quickly alert them trying to run but as it came closer you pushed them out of the way trying to take most of the impact. You landed harshly on the uneven terrain having multiple gashes litterred all over your body. You couldn’t breathe, you were panicking but not for yourself but for your brothers well beings. You struggled to to stand trying to look to where you pushed them, looking over you see them helping each other up with small scratches on them. Relief washes over you knowing that they are okay.

Jake witnessed all of it and came as quickly as possible but not towards you. He went straight to his sons, thinking you were a tough enough warrior to help yourself up. Jake pulling Lo’ak and Neteyam with him but Lo’ak began to go against trying to reach you. “Sir what about y/n? She is hurt, we can't just leave her!” he yelled in desperation. Jake pulled him back “She will be fine, she will meet us back as at camp”

You watched them leave, your chest aching and wondering why he would just leave you there. You struggled to stand while calling for your Ikran. Your Ikran kxamtxon, assisted you in standing up, you threw yourself on her back now heading back to your “home.” Landing you see your father waiting for you. Still struggling to walk over to him, the first thing you hear is “I told you to keep a close eye on them and what do you do, you let them go down” yelling not even caring whether or not anyone could hear him. “I am sorry sir, it won’t happen again” you reply knowing if you’d get yelled at more if you were to say anything else. “It better not or so help me god, go and get fixed up now and get that crap off your face” you nod reluctantly slowly limping to the healing tent.

Entering the tent Mo’at spots you and ushers you quickly to sit. Silence until Lo’ak comes up to you to apologise. “I’m so sorry y/n, did father yell at you?” he asks quietly, “It is okay Lo’ak and no need to worry whether or not he yelled at me, it’s okay” not wanting to worry your brother any further. Turning to Neteyam asking if he was okay as well, he nodded and said sorry as well. You reassure them that it is okay once more. Your relationship with Neteyam isn’t as close compared to Lo’aks but Neteyam always comes to you when he is having a difficult time with father.

Mo’at finishes patching you up telling you to be more careful next time. Now walking away to your family tent, you see your mother waiting for you as well. Neytiri isn’t as harsh compared to Jake but it still breaks your heart knowing that your once loving mother doesn’t acknowledge you as much. Jake and Neytiri come to an agreement that you are to stay in the tent for a week as punishment.

_______________________________________________________________________

Staying in the tent all day was dreadful and boring. Sudden sounds were made outside of the tent, seeing your family in rough states and shaken up. You had wondered what had happened while they were all out. Immediately, you walked towards Tuk seeing as she is the most shaken up from whatever happened out there. “Oh tuktuk are okay?? What happened?” Tuk instead cries in your arms and you look toward Kiri, Lo’ak, and Neteyam to see if any of them would tell you what had happened.

While all of you were outside the tent, Kiri had explained to you about the events. Hearing your parents argue made you even more concerned. All of you had listened in and heard them mention leaving. Those words made you all freeze. Leave? Leave your home? The clan? Thoughts swirling in your head, the forest being the only place you knew. You couldn’t fathom the idea of leaving.

Later that night after everything had been told to us, you couldn’t sleep. Your whole life spent in the forest now just gone within seconds. Having to start a whole new life when your life now isn’t good. The aching feeling in your chest rises, thoughts of having to leave everything behind. Eventually you fall asleep with worried thoughts.

Witnessing your father get cut on the chest from Tarsem, it is now official. Flying away you look back knowing you won’t get the chance to see it again. Flying for it seemed like forever, we reached the reefs. Hearing the alarms blown from the clan, you all landed. Surrounded by the curious eyes of the Metkayina people, tsuraks flying above you. Jake and Neytiri doing the I see you gesture towards two people, that you were guessing was the Tsahik and Oloeyktan. You glance over to your siblings, seeing Lo’ak spot a girl you smirk and give him a knowing look. He rolled his eyes and went back to looking at the girl.

You had spaced out the rest of the interaction between your parents and the leaders of the clan. That is until the Tsahik grabbed Kiri and Lo’ak and yelled demon blood. Those words alone made you want to hiss at her but held back knowing how your parents and everyone else would react. Now being allowed to stay here, we were to be teached by their children, Ao’nung and Tsireya. Tsireya led us to our Mauri and let us settle in, Jake pulled you aside for a private conversation. Far away enough from the family he started talking “y/n I expect you to keep an eye on your siblings, and for you to be on your best behaviour. I can’t have you messing things up. If you get into any trouble while we are here I will personally deal with you. Got it?” Looking up at him slowly you nod “Yes sir, I promise nothing will happen” with that you walk back to mauri. While walking back, you still wonder why your parents had started acting like this. Everyone else gets treated better than you. You can’t but feel envy for you siblings as they get more recognition from your parents. Even Lo’ak, you feel horrible feeling envious towards him, he gets more attention than you and he does a lot of dumb stuff.

You push those thoughts away thinking that you shouldn't be having thoughts like that, but can’t help it.

_______________________________________________________________________

Jumping in the water with your brothers, you look around you looking at all the sea life around you. For once in your life, you feel at peace especially with your thoughts. You swam away from the group exploring the area yourself like Kiri. Eventually you came for air and looked around seeing your brothers above water as well.

You all come together, Ao’nung calling for ilus. While Tsireya took Lo’ak and tuk, Ao’nung had you and Neteyam. Neteyam had gone first, not doing horrible his first try but still got flung off. Looking over to Lo’ak, you see him get flung off as well and you laugh as Lo’ak resurfaces. Now it was your turn, Ao’nung was a rude little shit but a helpful teacher. It felt odd being taught by someone younger than you. Adjusting your stance, you take off at a slow pace, listening to what Ao’nung had said. You did well for your first try by not falling off, and that made you extremely proud of yourself.

Next was breathing, and that had gone by quickly especially with teasing Lo’ak about Tsireya getting his heart rate up. You were now just sitting beside Kiri in the water looking out into the distance just thinking. Thinking about how this is the most freedom you’ve gotten since you were a child.

Flashback

Drawing your arrow back, arms aching, back and core feeling strained. You shoot and miss the target again. “How many times do I have to tell you, arms higher and straighter back. You won’t hit anything if you keep this up” Jake had you practising for hours “but dad my body is hurting, I don’t think I can do anymore” you had started crying with the amount of pain you were in. Instead of your father telling you to stop and continue tomorrow, he yelled at you “Do you want to become a warrior or not, enough with the crying there is no reason to cry. Do it again, we aren’t stopping until you hit the target properly” With that, you continued crying quietly but proceeded to keep shooting arrows but eventually you hit one.

You looked up to your father hoping to see a proud face but instead you saw nothing but a stone cold face telling you to keep going. At that point you collapse from being overworked. Next thing you know, you wake up in the healing tent with no one else here.

Flashback end

You sigh with a shaky breath not wanting to cry. Back to peaceful silence you were suddenly interrupted by Ao’nung and his gang. Things led to another. Ao’nung called Kiri a freak and you stepped in, “Do not call me sister a freak, I advise you leave us alone” Ao’nung looked at you giving you a smirk “Who are you to speak outcast, you’re just a loser in your own family” he laughed while you were close to punching him in the face. Lo’ak stepped in on time and then Neteyam came as well.

Lo’ak punches Ao’nung in the face and a while fight breaks out, Neteyam steps in too leaving you no choice to join as well. Being stronger than the rest, you took on most of them making sure Lo’ak and Neteyam aren’t harmed too much. The rest of them had started to gang up on you and purely just you. They kept pushing your brothers away so that they could beat you up.

It had gotten to the point where you were struggling to even throw a single punch at any of them. Eventually Jake and Tonowari came and broke up the fight. You were being dragged away, Jake having a strong grip on your arm making sure that there were bruises that were going to form. “Are you out of your mind y/n? What did I tell you NOT to do huh?”

You were at your snapping point

“What did you want me to do!” finally talking back.

“My sister and brothers were in trouble and as their older sister I went and protected them. YOU told me to protect them with my life and now I am being yelled at for something that isn’t my fault?” you felt your chest aching again, tears flooding your eyes.

“All my life I have done nothing but protect them and watch over them, but what about me HUH WHO IS PROTECTING ME, WHO IS LOOKING OVER ME” tears now freely flowing down your face.

Jake was shocked to say the least but instead of trying to comfort you or try to talk it out with you, he just yelled again.

“GET OUT, I do not want to see your face right now”

Neytiri had walked into the middle of the argument, just standing there shocked. When Jake had yelled for you to get out, you looked at your mom to see if she would say anything. Nothing came out, you couldn’t believe what you were witnessing and stormed out of the mauri.

You call for your Ikran, wanting to fly far away from your parents for the night. You spot a small island, you land and just lay down on the sand looking up at the sky. You break out crying again. Sobbing uncontrollably, and yelling and screaming, throwing sand. You were so frustrated that you couldn't help but cry.

Lo’ak was there to witness it all and his heart hurt for you. All his life you protected him and not once did he really notice how you felt. He felt like the worst brother in the world knowing that this is how you felt. He stormed into the Mauri ready to yell at his dad and mom

“Sir what i’m about to say i will not apologise for. My sister has done everything for me, she took care of me, protected me, comforted me. All you do for her in return is neglect and yell at her and for what?” he starts to choke up, tears slowly forming.

“Everything she has done was for us and not ONCE have you given her a break. She protected us from getting hurt today and during the raids. She got hurt the most and yet you care so little for her. I know for a fact that you guys loved her at one point because she talked so highly about you guys and apologising for your actions when we have our talks”

Jake and Neytiri just stare at Lo’ak trying to form sentences but nothing comes out. Lo’ak scoffs in disbelief

“If you open your eyes for once in your life, maybe you can be proud of her for once instead of disappointed. At this point I can’t even tell if you guys love her anymore and that is what disappoints me the most. The least you guys could do is let her talk and not yell at her for once”

Lo’ak was now crying because all he wants is you to be happy. He has admired you ever since he was young and seeing you finally reach your snapping point broke him. Walking out of the Mauri, he sees Kiri, Neteyam, and Tuk all with tears in their eyes after hearing everything. They all collectively decided to find you now worrying where you ran off to.

Now almost eclipse, your siblings could not find you anywhere. They were extremely worried, worried that you may have gotten hurt more or lost. With Jake and Neytiri, they now worry too. With everything that had happened, they looked at each other now knowing what they had done wrong. Guilt is what they felt, most of their lives they had thought of you as a burden after having Tuk. They never knew why it felt that way, maybe it was from the stress of having 5 kids. Though that isn’t an excuse for their behaviour and they know it.

They had not realised that what once was the light of their lives was now fading. Faded to the point where they might resent them forever. This thought had broken them, wanting to repair the damage that they had and become a happy family again.

_______________________________________________________________________

Lo’ak decided to fly out and see if you were any small islands while the rest continue to search around Awa’atlu. After a couple minutes, he sees a small figure and a dark blue Ikran on an island. He quickly descends towards you.

“Y/N!”

You raise your head to see where the sound had come from. You see Lo’ak running towards you, now jumping in your arms.

“Lo’ak what are you doing here” your voice hoarse from all the crying and screaming.

“You had me worried sick when I couldn’t find you. I heard everything that happened”

You pull Lo’ak away from your embrace.

“Lo’ak you should head back, da- Jake and Neytiri are probably looking for you”

He froze, hearing you call their parents by their names like they were strangers. Never in his life would he hear you say their names. It is like you now separated yourself from the family. How that made him even more upset towards his parents.

“No, I am staying here with you because I am your brother and I worry for you. It is my turn to sit and listen while you talk about your problems”

You huffed knowing that Lo’ak wouldn’t go, but you appreciate him for that. You both sat down properly, you looked out to the sea while Lo’ak is still looking at you waiting for you to talk.

“Before any of you were born, Jake and Neytiri were always smiling and happy with me. We played, talked, and loved each other…  They had told me that I was the light in their dark times. Told me how I somehow lifted up the mood anywhere I went and that made them so proud of me.”

Tears are now forming again but you held back not wanting to cry in front of your brother. Not wanting to look vulnerable. Lo’ak continues to listen, surprised how happy their parents used to be with you.

“Neteyam was born, nothing much changed apart from their attention being more on him now that he was the first born son. Everything was still normal, everyone was still happy. Once the rest of you were born, everything suddenly changed. I wasn’t a priority anymore to them. I was just a burden who happened to be related to them. Once I started training, never did I have one break. They worked me to the bone till I was exhausted and at some point I just collapsed.”

Both of you were now crying. Lo’ak had felt so much guilt not knowing this was happening, how cruel their parents were. Never in his life did he want to witness you cry because in his eyes you were always so strong even after being yelled at for his and Neteyams mistakes.

“These days it is like I am now the darkness that fills the room when I am near them. The light does not exist to them anymore, not in their eyes. I am just another being they have to keep alive. I have even thought about just running away but that never happened because I had you guys by my side. Without you guys, I don’t know what I might’ve done”

You took a long pause. Lo’ak took this as his turn to speak. You worried about what he may say.

“All my life I thought that I was a disappointment in mom and dads eyes…  Now hearing how you feel and knowing how they felt about you makes me so angry how I didn’t realise you were feeling this way.  I always thought you never took things to heart because they loved you and were just worried. I admired the fact that you were always so calm when it came to being yelled at by dad. I admired how strong of a warrior you became. I admired that you understood how upset I was after my arguments with dad. I am so sorry that I never realised you were hurting this bad”

Lo’ak now sobbing, you pulled him into a hug and he hugged you back tightly. Slowly stroking his head, you guys had stayed in that position for a good while before pulling away.

“Lo’ak, never ever be sorry for something you can’t see. It was my burden to deal with. I am the older sister, it was my responsibility. Protecting all of you is something I will always do without hesitation whether or not it gets me killed.” You now sat in silence looking out to the horizon. Turning to Lo’ak you speak again.

“It is best you head off before you start to worry everyone else”

“I am not leaving you here alone”

“Lo’ak, head back, I will be okay. Make sure to tell the rest of them that I am fine but I just need some time to myself for a little bit okay?”

Lo’ak nods, not wanting to leave but decides that it’s best to not worry his other siblings more than they already are. With that you watch Lo’ak fly away while you stay seated on the sand. Once his figure disappears you lay back down and think back on the days you were happy and free. Slowly drifting into sleep, thinking if you’d ever be that happy again.

_____________________________________________________________________

Waking up, you groan while stretching. Eyes puffy from the other day and mouth dry in need for some water. You prepare kxamtxon to head back “home” that was the one thing you were dreading. You were nervous especially after snapping at Jake the other day. You continue flying for a couple more minutes, mentally preparing yourself for the worst. You reach shore, you pat Kxamtxon off and head towards your family's Mauri. You start picking at your skin on your fingers, a habit you developed at a young age when you were nervous. 

You slowly enter hoping that it would just be your siblings present in the Mauri. Once in you only see Neytiri. She was waiting for you to return so that she could have a chance to speak with you after yesterday's events. “y/n…” She sits up quickly walking towards you with worried eyes. You wondered why she was acting like this, but in a way it felt comforting. But still being upset from the other day you brushed those feelings off. 

“I have been so worried, where did you go? Why didn’t you come back with Lo’ak?”

She tried grabbing your shoulders as a sign that she cared but you brushed her off. Seeing that you didn’t want her touching you she backed off though feeling a little hurt. 

“I just needed time to myself. You didn’t have to worry, this is the first time i’ve seen you this worried in a while” You chuckled dryly. 

That response broke Neytiri even more knowing that yesterday may have ruined her relationship with you forever. Looking back on the days you were younger, you were so happy. Looking at you now, you look as if she had abandoned you.

 “If that is everything, I will be heading back out. I do not know if I will be back tonight but I will be here tomorrow.” With that you left the Mauri leaving Neytiri alone with her thoughts. 

You went to go seek for your siblings but only finding Neteyam, Kiri, and Tuk. You greet them with a small smile while they all come running to you, pulling you into a big hug. You had asked them how they were doing and apologised for worrying them. They didn’t care and kept hugging you for a little while more.

“Where is Lo’ak? I thought he would be with you guys.”

“He went to apologise to Ao’nung for punching him the face” Neteyam chuckled

Although odd my Lo’ak would have to apologise for that, you laughed it off as well. Enjoying the day hanging out with your siblings and even Tsireya. Tsireya tried to naturally add Lo’ak in your conversations and that made you smile knowing Lo’ak had someone that could take care of him in the future. While you carry on with your conversation you start to worry a bit due to Lo’ak taking so long for one apology.

All of a sudden you hear abrupt laughter from behind you. You see Ao’nung and his ugly gang laughing at something while they were talking amongst themselves. One thing you noticed is that your brother is not anywhere near them. You stood up quick striding towards Ao’nung.

“Ao’nung where is my brother?”

He looks a bit scared for a second before giving you a smug smile.

“Oh, him? We just took him out hunting but he wanted to stay out a bit longer… alone”

His so called friends behind him started to snicker. That makes you even more concerned and angry. So you grab him by the ear and repeated again with a much more menacing tone.

“Where. Is. My. Brother.”

Now scared, Ao’nung told you quickly not wanting to get hit by you again. Him saying that they left him alone past the reef had you sprinting to where the ilu were. As you reach near the Ilu, you hear the blows go off. You ditch your idea and head right towards where the alarms were coming from. Heart racing not knowing whether your brother was hurt or even if it was your brother.

Finally reaching your destination, you see Lo’ak.  You sprint to him, engulfing him in the biggest hug ever. You pull apart checking to see if he had any injuries on him, nothing but small scratches. You finally let a breath of relief come out of you knowing he wasn’t hurt or dead. Just behind him you see Jake, you’ve been avoiding him at all costs but now you see him once again. Ready for more scolding of where you were.

Instead he brings both of you into an embrace, tight as if he was scared you’d disappear. Your heart swells a bit but again you pushed those feelings aside, still not being able to forgive for what he has done. Breaking the hug Lo’ak spot Ao’nung and ready to lunge at him before you stop him. Tonowari apologises and makes his son kneel to apologise as well. Your brother suddenly takes the blame and you look at him with concern in your eyes.

Walking away you catch up to Lo’ak and hooked arms together while you pat his head for comfort. Seeing Ao’nung pop up beside you guys, you were ready to talk to him but Lo’ak stopped you saying it was okay. You just gave Ao’nung a death stare knowing if he did something again he would be dead to you.

______________________________________________________________________

Everyone had now gone to sleep, you went to take a late night fly with your Ikran. You had named her kxamtxon since she looked like the midnight sky. Dark blue with lighter blue signatures accompanied with white. Gliding in the sky you felt at peace once more knowing there would be nothing bothering you at this moment. That was until Jake was flying towards you.

He signalled you to land on the small island you were heading towards. As much as you didn’t want to speak to him you nod at him. Both landing, you had sat on the sand and pat next to you. He sat down and began to speak.

“You know when you were younger, you had always mentioned that you would get an Ikran that looked like the night sky. Especially with how much you loved stargazing.”

You look at him wondering why he would bring that up now. Curious, you continue letting him talk.

“You were always such a bright kid, everyone loved you, I loved you, your mother loved you. We still do… I’m sorry we haven’t been showing it you these past years, I've kept making excuses saying I was busy with your younger siblings. What a lame dad I've become huh. Having you snap at me gave me a reality check and seeing you so upset and crying made me regret so much.”

You see him choking up, you had tears in your eyes too because you’ve longed for your father to talk to you like this. Being vulnerable to each other, sharing each other's feelings, that’s all you wanted. Seeing him like this felt like your dad was back, the dad you had when you were a baby.  You begun to speak up in a wobbly voice.

“You hurt me so much you started being harsh on me and ignoring me. You have been such a terrible father to me, even to your own sons. I need to realise that everything you do affects us all. You need to stop yelling at Lo’ak all he wants is your attention, for you to SEE him. Instead you’ve been so focused with this war that you’ve forgotten how to understand how we feel. The last time I've heard you say that you see me was when I was only an infant.”

Taking in all this and processing it had Jake in shambles. Not once did he realise how much of a shit father he has been to his own children, especially to you, his light. He knows he can’t blame the war or the sky people because he was the root of the problem since the beginning. He wants to embrace you and say he is sorry over and over again but even he knows that he can’t repair the damage he’s caused.

“I want to forgive you I really do, but with everything you’ve done to me… I don’t think it will be easy for me to trust you again. I am sorry.”

“No, don't be sorry, it’s all my fault and I know that now. I will work hard to earn your trust back even if it takes months or even years. I want to be your dad again.”

He grabs your hand giving it a small squeeze and you squeeze back to give a small reassurance that you’re okay with that. Sitting in silence gazing at the stars, you feel like a child again. Being able to lay down beside your dad pointing out your favourite stars, your heart finally settles to calming beats. This is what you longed for and you finally got it after years.

Heading back together you had a content smile on your face. Returning you see Neytiri waiting once again with worried eyes. You walk towards her with arms open and you finally embrace into a warm hug. She was shocked but hugged you back immediately seeing her daughter is finally back. Going into the Mauri, finally able to sleep peacefully without having to worry about anything. What you didn’t know was the events that were going to happen in the future.

_______________________________________________________________________

Waking up it was loud with na’vi jumping in the water with excitement. You came out and saw Tsireya running towards you guys stating that the Tulkun had returned. Turning towards the ocean, a beautiful scene of tulkun jumping and na’vi going towards them with joy. You all join them witnessing everyone finding their sisters and brothers. Rotxo introduced his brother to you, Kiri, and Tuk and rode on his fin, gliding through the water. Neteyam and Ao’nung chasing each other on their Ilu. Tsireya talking about Lo’ak to her sister. Everything was perfect.

Jake and Neytiri had put more effort into talking to you and laughing like old times. Neytiri even gave you new jewellery, with beautiful shells and beads mixed together. Again everything was perfect. Perfect until we saw Ronals sister's floating along with her calf. Everyone with looks of despair now enraged. Yelling and shouting from the clan ready to fight the sky people for what they had done. Jake yelling to not attack, but to tell the tulkun to go somewhere far away. Showing that if they are hit with the tracker they are marked for dead. Hearing that you turn to Lo’ak, watching him run to get an Ilu to warn payakan. You ran after him along with the rest of the kids.

Jumping in the water getting an Ilu chasing after Lo’ak, your heart now racing once again. Reaching payakan, he was in fact marked for death.

“Shit” you mumbled under your breath

All of you are struggling to pull the tracker off as the ship gets closer and closer towards you all. With a final tug it came loose, you took it in your hands and told everyone to go while you led them away from them.

Skypeople now chasing all of us under the water. Your heart is now beating at an extreme pace. Worried that your siblings could get hurt. From a distance you see Tsireya, Tuk, and Lo’ak being scooped up in a net from an avatar and their Ikran. Then Kiri was grabbed by another Ikran. You yelled trying to get to them as fast as you could but you were too late as they were now on the boat. You turned trying to find your father to tell him that they had been captured.

Now in a situation where your brother and sisters were stuck in a hostile position. You and Neteyam were waiting on the sidelines to see if we could anything to help but instead seeing your father move forward. At that moment you knew he was sacrificing himself and you couldn't do anything. Thinking that you’ve failed as both a daughter and sister, a sudden burst through the water showed payakan landing on the boat.

Everyone charging forwards ready to fight for their lives. You and Neteyam went forward to the ship to help your siblings. Payakan gets rid of most of the people on board, you and Neteyam jumped up. You surprise your siblings, cutting their restraints, giving each of them a hug. You hurry them off, telling them to get to safety. Then Lo’ak suddenly stops.

“We need to get spider!”

You had almost forgotten about him. Though deep in your gut you had a bad feeling. You knew something was going to go wrong but Lo’ak kept insisting. Finally agreeing, the three of you snuck on trying to find Spider. Once you spot him, you all jump down to kill off the surrounding men.

“Hurry let’s go”

You said desperation, the feeling in your stomach still not fading. Quickly trying to find the way out, you were now being shot at. All ducking for cover, you grab the gun that Lo’ak had grabbed.

“Lo’ak, Spider, be ready to run first and jump into the water on my signal okay?”

They nod. You gave them the signal, they started running as you begun to shoot at the soldiers. Seeing they made it safely, it was now Neteyams' turn then you. You gave him the signal thinking it was safe. You glance over seeing the gun being pointed at him. It was like everything was in slow motion. You dropped your gun running towards Neteyam and finally jumping in front of him.

You felt something odd hit your chest. You both land in the water, swimming up to the surface you see that Neteyam was alright cheering with Spider and Lo’ak. Then it struck you, you were struggling to stay on the surface and feeling the searing pain coming from your chest.

“N-Neteyam L-Lo’ak”

They both snapped their heads toward you, seeing you struggle they had swam over to quickly. Both in shock calling for their Ilu.

“No no y/n, stay awake okay? You’re going to be okay. NETEYAM help me put her on the Ilu!”

Grabbing you they lift you on the Ilu, now riding quickly towards their parents keeping pressure on your gushing wound. Lo’ak crying, trying not to believe that this was happening right now. Neteyam heavily focused on trying to keep the blood inside with tears running down the sides of his face. Finally reaching their parents, they carefully try to get you on top of the rock.

“Careful hold her head”

Jake couldn’t believe what he was witnessing with his own eyes. His sons carrying their daughter, covered in her blood. Neytiri now flying down with her Ikran, could not believe what she was witnessing either.

“NO Y/N, no my precious daughter”

They had just gotten her back but now she was fading again, Their light was now fading again. Their light was now fading again after being relit. Struggling to breathe you get some words out

“Dad take care of everyone, promise me”

Now wheezing to breathe. Jake grabs your hands and rests his other hand on your cheeks.

“No no you gotta stay awake babygirl, we still have so many nights to go stargazing together an-and we’re gonna go hunting together okay? Sounds good right?”

Jake now struggling to get words out as his first born daughter now struggles to breath.

“No dad, promise me you’ll take care of everyone, don’t blame anyone or yourself okay? P-promise me that.”

“I promise I swear, and i'll take care of you to okay?”

“I want to go home da-”

The light in your eyes had faded. Silence now fills your ears, finally peace overcomes your body as it stills in Jakes arms.

“Y/n? Y/N? NO oh great mother no please PLEASE”

Neytiri continues yelling and praying to bring you back. Lo’ak crying hysterically seeing his sister fade in his dads arms. Neteyam goes numb looking at the scene unfolding before him. Tsireya massages your legs to get circulation going, praying that you were just unconscious. The light in their lives is now gone forever.

Jake turns to see that his daughters are now also missing. Asking Lo’ak where they are, saying they are still on the ship near the moonpools. Lo’ak wanted to help but was told to stay put with his sister. Neteyam and Tsireya caressing your now cold body. Neteyam now sobs knowing that his older sister is now gone forever. The sister he was able to confined to when he was overwhelmed with the pressure of being the next oloeyktan. He sister who would take the blame for both his and Loaks mistakes. The sister that could make him smile in any given situation. His light… gone.

_______________________________________________________________________

Pure blinding light, that’s all you can see. An aching feeling within you surfaces as you slowly realise where you are. With Eywa, the mother of pandora. You realised that you were dead. Adjusting to the light, you were in the forest. Specifically inside your old home. You walk around, grazing your fingers over the objects you used to have when you were younger. Now walking outside, you head towards the top of the tree. You walk towards a certain spot where you would stargaze. Laying down, you close your eyes and let go.

_______________________________________________________________________

Quaritch now having Tuk and Kiri, he had mentioned that Jake didn’t want to lose another daughter. Both Kiri and Tuk stared blankly at him, knowing the only daughter left was you.

As fights went down, Neytiri and Jake both ran off of adrenaline and rage. Killing off all the soldiers. Finally reaching their daughter Tuk but Kiri in the hand of quaritch with a knife to her throat.

The ship slowly sinking, Neytiri and Tuk trapped, Jake slowly drowning. Jake's last thought before going unconscious was how much he had let you down. Blaming himself for the little time he gave himself to make amends with you. Thoughts now disappeared as he resurfaced with Lo’ak beside him.

Everyone is now making it out together, hugging each other, crying together. They went back to the rock to retrieve your body. Tuk and Kiri now seeing your still body, they cried their hearts out. Tuk holding onto your arm and Kiri holding your head in her lap.

The funeral was now happening. They gently placed your body into the large leaf, slowly going out towards the anemone, the light. Carefully removing you from the floating leaf, they slowly ascend down into the water. Gently placing you in the bed of anemone, slowly watching as you sink the light consuming your body. Energy now returned to Eywa.

On land, Ao’nung, Tsireya, Rotxo, all silently mourning as they saw you as an older sister as well. You helping Tsireya with small chores and gossiping about different things especially Lo’ak. Teasing Ao’nung like a younger brother when he does something embarrassing. Helping Rotxo with his grandma and lending tips into becoming a better warrior. They too lost a little bit of light that day.

The family is now approaching the spirit tree. They all attach their queues to be able to see you. First Lo’ak, he saw the memory of you comforting him after having a tough day with their father. She was able to cheer him up with simple words. He saw how they now playfully fought each other. How he missed hearing your joyous laughs and your comforting words.

Neteyam saw the memory of them when they were much younger. He was struggling to shoot a bow properly. Frustrated that he couldn’t get it right, you came over and helped him. No harsh words being said, just smooth guidance which put him at ease. Seeing how patient you were with him and how kind your words were, he really saw how much light you really emitted.

Tuk had the memory of them flying on her Ikran. One of her favourite memories of them together. You had taken Tuk on a joyride with your Ikran. Tuk screams with excitement and you laugh with her. Flying in circles and doing quick loops. That day was amazing for Tuk. It was such a freeing feeling.

Kiri, the memory that came to mind was having a quiet talk about how she feels her, how she feel eywa. You were the only one she could talk to because she knew you would not judge her. She talked about how she felt her breath and how she courses throughout the plants. You listened in amazement, seeing how close of a connection she had for Eywa. Kiri saw how you didn’t judge her once at all and just watched you watch her in amazement.

Neytiri had the memory of when you were merely a baby. The first sight of the light of her life. She remembers how you held her finger, how you giggled at the smallest things she did. Your constant smile was the light keeping the darkness away from her. Looking at the memory, she had a soft smile on her face. 

Jake, he had spotted you in your spot. He saw you laying there, eyes closed. He slowly walks towards the spot. You hear noise, and open your eyes just to see your dad sitting down beside you. You saw tears forming in his eyes and gently grabbed his hand.

“Do you remember when I was younger, we would always come up here to stargaze?”

He turns toward the sky, his hand still in yours.

“Of course, you would always drag me because I was walking to slow”

Laughing at his answer because he was right. You would have to pull him by his arm to hurry up not wanting to miss a single star going away even though they wouldn’t disappear.

“I really missed moments like this… being able to hangout with my dad in peace”

“I missed these moments too, much more than I realised”

You watch as his tears fall down his cheeks. Seeing this made you start tearing up as well. You pull him into a hug knowing he won’t have this anymore in real life. You whisper quietly while your head is tucked in his chest.

“I forgive you”

Jake's eyes went wide, wondering why you had forgiven him when he didn’t deserve it.

“I don’t want you to blame yourself dad, I know we never had the closest relationship but I want everyone to be happy even if I’m not there.”

He hugs you tighter not wanting to let go. Sobbing and wondering how he ever deserved you ever.

“Nga yawne lu oer,  Oel Ngati Kameie”

“Oel Ngati kameie, Nga Yawne lu oer sempu”

With that he opens his eyes, looking at the rest of his family with smiles on their faces looking at their memories with you in them. Now knowing that the light will always be lit because it you will always be present in their hearts.