#I kind of expected veth

[essektheylyss]

It is wild to me how many people are like, "hahaha op's speech did nothing," as if I am running and participating in these polls to get validation for my blorbo. If I just wanted to be content with my blorbo, I would absolutely not be tossing him up on a platform to be heckled for a week straight. I would be retreating to some echo chamber Discord server to experience the emotional equivalent of everyone gathering around and petting a puppy.

I literally do not think Essek is going to win this poll! I do not think he is going to win the tournament! I seeded Laerryn number one for a reason! For a number of factors I think it would be very difficult for anyone to beat her! I literally put him and Laerryn on the same side of the bracket so that they would not end up in the final, because I did not think it was going to be an interesting fight! We as a fandom beat "Laerryn could smash any wizard in Exandria without contest" into the ground weeks ago! I considered writing a stump speech just for kicks for every semifinalist, because I like to argue things and I love playing up a ridiculous and meaningless kayfabe!

But like, Laerryn has swept many polls, and it's deeply boring to me if she wins in a landslide. I am a polling nerd, and I can confirm that no one watches landslide races. They are not interesting. And this is fully just for the fun of it, so I am gonna make it interesting.

If there's no challenge, no consideration of how the other side might win, then what the fuck is the point of running a tournament?

In conclusion:

[aeoris4lovers]

thoughts on verin getting to know the mighty nein:

fjord: voted most likely to be verin's crush. each of them thinks the other is way cooler than them and sometimes it just makes them really awkward around each other but once they get comfortable they're just very loud about Look At My Badass Friend. they fall into the habit of shooting each other "can you believe this" looks when the others start making ridiculous plans, as if they don't also love the chaos. verin is committed to being fjord's personal hype man, and he takes his job very seriously.

beau: at first, beau mostly just thinks verin is kind of annoying (though funny to watch when he annoys the shit out of essek), but he turns out to be a good workout buddy and is more than willing to get wrapped up in her and fjord's shenanigans. the first time they really hit it off is when beau is connecting the dots on her latest mystery of choice and verin jumps in to start bouncing off of her ideas, and everyone else just watches in awe as they frantically unravel it together.

caleb: verin is not immune to the urge to manhandle the resident scrawny wizard, and is even less so after finding out he's the one essek is in love with. he plays the part of the "if you ever hurt him i will make you pay" brother for a while (mostly because he thinks it's funny and it annoys essek) but ultimately, he becomes like a brother to caleb too. also, he's obsessed with any and every cat that caleb brings his way. bring him a particularly small cat and he will shed a tear.

veth: verin thinks veth is hilarious, but he's also a bit terrified of her (which absolutely goes to her head). he does, however, prove to be fantastic with luc, and the presents he brings for luc start being accompanied by particularly nice trinkets he thought she would like. sometimes veth teases fjord talking about how strong verin is, which immediately makes verin blush every time.

jester: these two together are literal sunshine. they bring out each other's excitement and absolutely light up a room once they set each other off. if you see them whispering to each other, expect the unexpected, because they might be planning the prank of the century but they also might just be planning on surprising everyone with baked goods. (sometimes both. usually both.) essek fears seeing them in a room together because it exponentially increases his chances of getting hug-attacked.

kingsley: kingsley flirts with verin constantly and verin is adorably confused by it, which only makes it more appealing for kingsley. verin thinks it's really cool that kingsley is an actual pirate, and kingsley absolutely eats up the attention and awe. they sometimes gossip together, and kingsley manages to bring out a catty side of verin that essek didn't even know existed.

caduceus: while verin was the odd one out among his generally serious family, he fits right in with the chaos of the clay family. he easily falls back into the role of "lovingly shitty little brother," so much so that caduceus' own annoying brother side tends to come out while they're together. unsurprisingly, caduceus is also the only one able to get verin to talk about all the things he tries to pretend aren't weighing him down.

yasha: beefy blonde besties, classic introvert-extravert pair, and mlm/wlw solidarity at its finest. it's not uncommon to find the two of them staying up late talking about anything that comes to mind. verin is no less convinced of yasha's ability to send magical messages than yasha herself is. when her wings are out, he begs her relentlessly for a ride until she gives in. he has a certain brightness to his personality that yasha didn't want to admit she missed when molly became kingsley.

bonus:

astrid: verin is, respectfully, absolutely terrified of astrid. not just because she used to be an assassin for the other side of the war he was trained to fight – he gets over that part quickly enough, he just thinks she specifically is intimidating, and she regularly leans into it just to amuse herself. eventually, he works up the confidence to start trying to retaliate and fuck with her; he's not often successful, but it's a fun game and they're both irrationally competitive about it.

eadwulf: tied for most likely to be verin's crush. verin also thinks he's intimidating, but more in the "if you put a knife to my throat i might just have to make out with you" way than in the "if you put a knife to my throat i would say my goodbyes and accept my fate" way. eadwulf is particularly hard to get a real laugh out of, but verin gets good enough at it over time that even caleb is impressed. very rarely, verin even manages to get a snort-laugh out of him, which caleb never lets him live down.

[all-pacas]

Got any widobrave in you? Been thinking about them lately.

You know, I don’t — but I also have a fic I never finished or posted anywhere! Actually I have a couple of them!

crooked kind

She expects it to feel different. Stepping onto a ship, now, after everything. And it does, kinda. The ship is darker, more shadowy. Quieter. The gunpowder smells different, less sharp, until she puts her nose up to it, enough that she gets a bit up her nose when she sniffs and then sneezes and then looks around to make sure no one is watching. Tugs at her hair anxiously. Back above decks.

She still doesn’t like the way the ship moves, rocking around, the water tossing it and pushing it and letting it know who is boss — the water, the ocean going hey now I can sink you any time I want — and she’d thought, for a second, about leaving her ring with Yeza since Luc insists on going swimming for some insane reason, but she twists it around her finger now and is glad she didn’t. Didn’t give it up. Didn’t think about it for long.

Fjord and Beau are running around yelling things about getting the ship ready to sail, Fjord yelling first and then Beau repeating him louder a second later. Caleb is over with Orly and Yasha, looking at a map or something, and she goes over to them. Weird looks from Marius and the crew as she passes. Not the same kind of weird looks as she used to get: a goblin! ahh! Something duller, more familiar: what are you doing here? I don’t know you. You don’t belong.

“An’ then we’ll be h… headin’ west, ‘round these, ah, shoals here,” Orly is saying as she approaches the little table they have set up on deck, near the ship’s wheel, a map held down with red weights. She picks one up, just to feel the heft of it. Orly clears his throat as the map curls. She puts it back.

“Veth,” says Caleb. He hesitates before he says her name. “Have you settled in?”

They haven’t even left port yet, the gangplank is still out: a few of the crew are rushing back and forth, loading last second supplies.

“Mm,” she says. “It’s basically the same as we left it.”

She thinks. It’s a lot harder to see in dark corners now.

Caleb smiles at her, and she puts her arms and chin up on the edge of the table as Orly resumes explaining their route, and Yasha nods along solemnly, tracing the path with her finger.

Yasha spends the first couple of days following everyone around. She’s not subtle about it, and also she’s gigantic. First she tries to build barrels and do carpenter things with Jester, but she’s unexpectedly clumsy with her hands. She follows Beau and Fjord around for a bit, which, because Beau also just follows Fjord around, ends up making him look like he has two bodyguards who are a lot tougher than he is. Next is Caduceus, and last is Caleb.

Veth also spends a lot of her free time around Caleb. So she watches Yasha try to learn to read maps, and watches Yasha and Caleb have quiet moments talking, and watches Yasha get really annoyed at the way Caleb will, whenever Yasha estimates a direction, immediately correct her with “actually it’s west-south-west” or whatever bullshit.

She loves Caleb. But he’s so full of it sometimes.

That’s what she says, out-loud, after Caleb spends ten minutes trying to explain to Yasha that actually she can tell that north is over behind his left shoulder, but two inches left of that, because he just knows, basically. She says: “Caleb, I love you, but you are so full of shit.” She turns to Yasha. “Want to play with explosives instead?”

And that’s how Yasha becomes junior assistant powder monkey.

It’s only until later she thinks about the way Caleb cut himself off, his startled expression, when she’d said that to him. Not hurt. It was something else. Surprise. Something different.

Here’s the problem.

The thing is, there’s lots of problems. The thing is, when she thinks about herself she thinks me, but she also thinks Nott more than she thinks Veth, and when the others all kind of decided on their own to call her Veth, she was glad but — she doesn’t know. Fjord yells Veth, you’re not supposed to play with explosives we’re on a ship, and she turns her head but her first thought is how does he know about Veth? and then she remembers that’s her now. The problem is that things taste different and look different and feel different. Some of it she remembers, from the last time, when she’d woken up to mud and jeering laughter and rope burns, to shadows being too bright and smells being too sharp and her mouth bleeding from the inside, from dozens of tiny tooth cuts. Some of it she’d forgotten. The way her fingers seem to just — feel more. The way she hears less. How her teeth feel in her mouth, how her ears don’t turn and swivel when she wants to listen. She’s a little taller now. She weighs more, she has tits and an ass and is frankly just incredibly hot. She’s still quick but it feels different, to run, to crouch. She gets an eyelash caught in one of her eyes and once she’s done rubbing it out she thinks: holy shit, I have eyelashes again, and runs to bum some mascara off of Beau. Her skin is softer and bruises easier. She doesn’t feel as hungry all the time. She’d never noticed how warm she always was when she was a goblin until she starts feeling chilly sometimes, out on the deck of the ship.

Here’s the other problem.

She feels things more. Not emotionally. If anything she feels it less, a little… slower, maybe calmer, like things aren’t always jumping up and starling her to death. It’s not emotions. Not exactly. It’s just — more.

She’d joked about it. Sunbreaker? Wow was he hot. But she hadn’t really… felt anything. Not like that. Yeza had never tried anything more than a chaste kiss or hug now and then, and she’d felt a guilty relief. How would it even work? Would it work? Or would it be painful and scraping and difficult? She might have tried if he really wanted to, but he didn’t and she was glad. And that was weird, because she had always thought of herself as really into that kind of thing. They’d been going at it since they were sixteen, you know?

So it’s Yeza’s fault, really.

She turns back into her true, hot self, and she feels things again, her body, you know, works again, and they fuck like gnomes for days, and then she goes onto a ship and the first night snuggles in with Caleb the way she always has, except he holds himself really stiff and she doesn’t notice at first until he accidentally brushes her boob and moves away and she thinks oh shit yeah I have tits now and starts thinking about other things, because Caleb is not bad looking now that he bathes sometimes and keeps his hair out of his face, and so the next day she talks loudly and often about her wonderful cannons belowdecks —

(“Veth, you are absolutely fucking forbidden from ever firing the cannons without express orders from me or—“ and Fjord had hesitated, looking over at a slightly-too-eager Beau, failing to stamp out her excitement in time, “Me. Just me. No explosives. Nada.”)

— and sets up a hammock there that evening.

And then three days later, she helps Yasha set up her own hammock, after giving a long speech to her about how half the job of the gunner or powder monkey was to, like, really understand your cannons, and how this was the best way. It’s a lot harder to set a hammock up for Yasha since she’s a giant, but they figure it out eventually, even if her butt ends up landing only an inch or two above the floor.

Here’s the problem.

After they figure out how to move shit around to set up Yasha’s hammock, they go to the galley for dinner with everyone. Night one, Veth jumped up on a table and gave the I used to be a goblin speech to everyone, so she gets less weird “why is there a smokin’ hot halfling hanging out with these idiots” looks now, and dinner is nice. She can actually eat Caduceus’s tofu without getting cramps now, which helps a lot. She jokes around with the others and sits next to Caleb, as always, because they’re not avoiding one another. They talk about the peace conference and have debate #582 about if Essek (codename: Kevin) is okay or not, if Kevin can be trusted. They talk about Yasha’s hammock. Invite Jester and Beau to join the girl’s only super cool cannon slumber party.

“I thought you two,” Beau says, gesturing at Veth and Caleb, “were like, joined at the hip or whatever.” And then she gives Veth a smirk that probably means Yeah I see you, and it takes Veth all she has to keep from turning to Jester and saying something awful like The Traveller is actually kinda hot, right? back. But she doesn’t, because she’s a good fucking friend.

“What are you talking about?” Veth says instead. “‘Lebby, are you mad because I want to sleep with my cannons?” She doesn’t look anywhere near him when she asks.

“Maybe this isn’t dinnertime conversation?” Fjord says.

“Of course not,” says Caleb, and she hopes he meant her thing and not Fjord’s.

And then they all start talking about Travelercon instead.

So now she has two options. Talk to Caleb, or never talk to him again.

No. Now she has three options. Those two, or…

She and Yeza weren’t, like, swingers. Not yet. They were too young for it, generally speaking: you were supposed to wait until your kids were out of the house and all that, focus on raising your family, and Luc was only five and that was assuming they didn’t have more kids. Once you get married, that’s supposed to be it until your kids were grown: it was supposed to be good for the family to turn insular like that. Nowadays some people Veth’s age did talk about open marriages like they should be part of the vows, but it’s not like she and Yeza ever really talked about it back in Felderwin. They both wanted kids. It made sense that they should focus on their family, and anyway, Yeza was the love of her life so it’s not like she really wanted to fuck anyone else.

Was the love of her life.

Still is.

Really.

But things are so weird now, and so after they’d fucked for the third to last time in Nicodranis, when they were talking about buying a house and investing in the timeshare market, Veth had added, as casual as she could: “And if you wanted to like, date around a little, as long as you don’t knock anyone up and go all family values on me…”

“Are you serious?” Yeza asked, and then sat up and pulled his glasses on from the side of the bed.

“What are you doing?”

“This is a conversation that I need to be able to see for. What are you saying?”

Veth had been briefly distracted, but then Yeza pulled the sheet back up. “I mean… are you mad?”

“No…” he’d let the word kinda trail there.

“I mean, you can knock someone up, I guess, it’s just no second families, so overall I’d prefer you didn’t,” she’d said, using this old-fashioned Halfling term that meant ‘the insular family,’ like they were supposed to be raising back home.

“I’m not going to knock anyone up.” Yeza hesitated, pushing his glasses up. “I didn’t think we’d have this conversation for another like, twenty years.”

“I didn’t think I’d be alive in twenty years, up until a couple of days ago,” she mentioned, and then winced when he’d looked hurt. “I mean, I’m okay with it. I keep running off on you and abandoning you and, and leaving, and dy — almost dying —“ because she hadn’t yet told him about that box, or even really about drowning, and planned to never, “and — and I mean, I know it can’t be fun, I would be like, what a selfish bitch, and so if you want to—“

“Veth,” he started saying, about halfway through. “Veth. I don’t think you’re a selfish anything.” He’d taken her hands.

Well, I do, she’d thought. Looking at their hands. The fine hairs on her arms that Nott had lacked. Weird, how even shit like body hair was somehow amazing now.

“I’m happy just — knowing you’re happy, and waiting for you.”

“But I’m not! I can’t just — look, I’m going to leave you money, so buy a house and get Luc into a really great school and then go party, or, or buy the _really fancy_ alchemy ingredients, or just… don’t just sit around waiting for me, because I don’t know when I’ll be back. I want you to fuck other people! Fuck everyone in Nicodranis! Fuck Jester’s mom!”

“I am pretty sure I can’t afford her.”

“I will leave you so much money.”

They both laughed, and Veth felt herself relaxing. A little.

“Okay,” he’d said. “I don’t know if I will or not, but—“ she’d been about to tell him to do it, and he’d raised a hand then, to shush her, “but if I meet someone I like, I’ll think about it very seriously. Okay?”

“Like, or find hot.”

“Like, or find hot,” he’d agreed. He’d hesitated, and then he’d smiled. “But… you too, okay? What’s an adventure on the high seas without a sexy sailor or two?” She’d smiled. He’d hesitated again, and then added: “Or… if there’s anyone else you have in mind. Whatever. It’s fine with me, okay? Screw insular families.”

And then they’d gone ahead and fucked for the second-to-last time.

And kind of, not in an asshole way, but she’d been thinking about that last thing he said as they did. Anyone else you have in mind. Just hanging out there. Unremarked on.

Look. Here’s the thing. Caleb is hot. In a disgusting, takes a bath but doesn’t do laundry kind of way. In a forgets to shave past the point where his stubble is attractive kind of way. In a too many ribs kind of way.

In a long fingers and very nice eyes and a handsome jawline kind of way.

And when she was Nott she knew it but it never really — she didn’t feel it, so it was pretty easy. He was both hot and completely unfuckable, even in her fantasies, and she was disgusting and a goblin and that made it all very neutral and safe. When she’d curl up next to him, sometimes he’d put an arm over her if it was cold out, and it would feel nice and comforting and she’d feel this warm tingling love all over, but there was never sexual tension, even in her head, even in her infrequent attempts at daydreaming.

Because there couldn’t be. She was ugly and disgusting even if he was kind and handsome. It was wonderful of him to even willingly touch her.

And then she and Yeza fucked for three days straight, and it was like, fuck, this is what that feeling is. Like a switch went off in her head: remember how great this is? How good it feels? How hot all your friends are?

And she’s pretty fine now herself. Curves for days. But —

It’s not like she’s a different person. Whoever she is. Even if she also is.

And it isn’t like just because she got laid, she’s not horny on main all the time, just looking for people to jump. It really isn’t. She’s not crazy, or Beau flirting with some temporary member of the party. Jester braids her hair up for her one morning and it’s all nice and Jessie’s hands in her hair, on her scalp, are very soothing but Veth doesn’t feel horny at all. She and Fjord fight over going swimming, and it’s not sexual tension.

“I love you, but you are so full of shit,” she says to Caleb, and he kind of half freezes, and she hears him say it to her with different ears and eyes and she is not stupid, okay? She’s not. She knows he did not mean it like that and will never mean it like that and that they are best friends and he probably thought she was dying, in a way she did die, and it was very sweet and does not mean—

She’s not in love with him. Not like that. She’s just…

Well, she isn’t. There’s no just.

She has a couple of ideas for spells in her head. They’re not fancy ones since she’s not great at magic, but she’s seen Caleb noodling around enough with his spells that she thinks it’s probably possible. If he does all the technical stuff for her. So she mentions it kind of in passing, and he gets really excited and she chickens out.

She’s not sure why. Only because immediately he looked so happy and she got scared, and because last time they’d done this she was different and — and it’s weird. The first time she’d used magic, just a little nugget of it, she’d figured it was probably him tricking her, the way he would sometimes use his light spell to make it seem like she was glowing, back when they were begging for coin. But he’d grabbed her and hugged her hard enough that she’d lost her breath, exclaiming, I’m so proud of you! You’ve done it!

And she’d been — well, at first she hadn’t believed him, obviously. But then she had and she’d felt herself smile and then laugh, from relief or fear or both, and he’d squeezed her hands and said, _now, we will work on a spell_.

And it was pretty stupid but it felt like it mattered. Like it was some big important moment. Not using magic, although that was cool. But the way he’d hugged her and her nose had squashed into him and he’d smelled like wet wool and she’d been happy. Really happy. For probably the first time since she’d died, you know?

So he gets excited when she says she wants to invent her own spell, and she’s not thinking about that until he demands they start practicing now, and then she is thinking about it and she gets scared.

So it’s avoid Caleb forever, talk to him, or knock on his door and say can you help me with magic?

And she wants so fucking bad to get drunk first, but she chooses the third option.

She knocks on his door. Which is super weird, because it used to be her door, and also she has basically never once knocked before going in to see Caleb, ever. There’s no reply, but she knows he’s in there — she _might_ have followed him and then spent half an hour getting up her nerve — so she thinks about leaving and instead just opens the door. “If you’re masturbating this is your two second warning!” she calls as she does.

Caleb is sitting on the bed, reading. He starts, kind of dropping the book, and even though he isn’t jacking it she kind of feels like she walked in on him anyway.

She tugs at her braid. “Hey! What’s up? What’s goin’ on?”

--

[beatriceeagle]

I'm sorry for immediately ignoring the structure of the DVD extras game!! I just came here from the final chapter of THE (and what a triumph!!), and I had three questions, if you'd permit me:

1) Just something simple I was wondering - I couldn't remember if it was mentioned in the text, how old was Eccron when she abused Jasper?

2) How did you come up with/develop the side characters, like Jasper and Eccron and Ange, and their place in the plot? Was it that you first decided which parts of Caleb and Beau you wanted to poke?

3) Veth being very motherly and suggesting Bren/Luc was very funny. How well do you think Bren and Luc actually get along?

<3 <3 <3

Don't worry about it—questions in any format are appreciated! <3 Answers under the cut.

1. It was never said, but she was in her early-mid 20s. Probably 23 or 24.

2. Basically, yes! Ange actually came before Jasper—the very earliest work I did on this fic was when it was still supposed to be a fairly short one-shot, and the first three of four paragraphs are basically unchanged from that version. I basically just modeled her after the four-year-olds I've known personally, and a lot of her specific traits developed organically from the details I happened to choose for that scene. The Tiefling and the Tailor led to the bear-shaped pancake led to her massive stuffed animal collection and so on. As the fic developed, I knew I wanted her to be a mostly cheerful presence, both because Beau and Yasha deserved to have some fun parenting, and also because I wanted the eventual reveal of what Grankton did to hit hard.

In the one-shot version of the fic, Beau didn't really have a plot, but I wanted her to have kids because I wanted to tap into that idea of seeing yourself from the outside. Caleb is seeing his literal self, and Beau is seeing her teenage son, but also her teenage self. So Beau always had a teenage son named Jasper who was into the Cobalt Soul, but in my one shot draft, he and Beau got along.

Once I committed to writing the long version of the story, that changed, and Jasper's personality developed to fit. I had a few driving ideas: I wanted him to be a basically good kid, helpful and well-behaved, because that would make his antagonism towards Beau much harder for her to deal with. (Beau expects teenagers to have attitudes; she was a teenager with an attitude!) I kept the Cobalt Soul angle, because that drove the plot, but now I had to think about what kind of person Jasper would be to be drawn to monkhood: curious and thoughtful and extremely protective. Very early on, I figured out his relationship with Ange, and that fully unlocked him for me. And then, as with Ange, the more I wrote him, the more the little details accumulated.

Eccron developed as she did almost entirely to reinforce the parallels that I was building between Jasper and Bren, Jasper and Caleb, and Jasper and Beau.

3. Bren has zero feelings about Luc at the moment because they haven't interacted much. Luc, I would imagine, is extremely curious about Bren, but he has Veth's sense of social graces on top of a teenage attitude, so he probably expresses it in weird ways. I think over the course of a lot of Mighty Nein reunions, Bren would probably come to see Luc as something like a lovable, kind of funny but kind of irritating kid cousin. Veth's matchmaking dreams will be tragically thwarted.

[revvethasmythh]

Share your reunion widobrave thoughts please?? Only if you want to but I would love to hear them!

Apologies for how long this took to reply to! Most of that time has been spent trying to figure out how to phrase this in a way that doesn't sound utterly deranged, though conceptually, I understand it kind of is. So, for formality's sake, I am now donning my shippers cap, and am not to be held liable for making more thoughtful/thought out meta on this topic atm. Currently, we are simply living in the Widobrave Enrichment Zone™️.

Okay, with that disclaimer out of the way, let's continue!

Essentially, my widobrave thoughts re: the reunion are pretty deeply tied to whoever said during m9 reunited two-shot that Caleb and Veth were behaving like a divorced couple sharing custody of Luc, because it was a very funny, on-point comparison considering Veth would literally take Luc all the way to Rexxentrum (with Yeza holding down the fort at home, presumably, while they were both gone) regularly enough that Veth was stated as probably keeping spare clothes at Caleb's place. Like Caleb gets every other weekend with Luc and Veth or something. And that vibe to the Luc-Caleb relationship has persisted even seven years down the line to excellent effect. Like, I have derived an incredible amount of joy from Caleb's extremely concerned, angry, and fairly paternal treatment of Luc during the one-shot that really delivered to me the essence of "Caleb is Luc's father with partial custody and suddenly has to take emergency custody of The Child when he wasn't expecting to."

Like I said, none of this is necessarily meant to be productive, thoughtful meta, but it has brought me a great deal of joy and enrichment in my environment nonetheless. And, really, what else can we ask of our joyful shipper's minds but that?

[tazlov]

Viridian Mercy: Chapter 3

Oh, by the gods, she hates me.

The same human that I had saved, the same human that made jokes and over-shared her over-confidence… and I really thought we were getting along fairly well.

Samantha peered over to me as I had been quietly playing my music. “What the hell is that?”

“What's what?” Her deeper voice (for a human, at least,) struck my antennae just a little bit. I was just glad she wasn’t yelling.

“That noise. What is that?”

“It's… it's music!” I turned it up a little louder for her to hear. “It's some kind of breakcore thing.”

She listened for a bit, her face slowly changing into something bitter and unimpressed. “...That's just noise, Veth. That ain't real music.”

“Well, then what do you consider to be real music, then?” I made air quotes with my hands. She smirked at me.

“Here, lemme get my Glass connected.” She reached for her phone, and connected to the speaker. It took her a few seconds, but soon a blaring, terrible guitar with frantic drums invaded my senses.

“Ah… okay…” My ears and antennae went back at the noise. It almost hurt to listen to.

“You want me to turn it down?” Samantha watched me, more carefully than I expected.

“Please.”

“Alright.” She turned it down a few notches, and it was somewhat bearable.

I tried to hide the sigh that escaped me, and I fumbled with my own Glass for a few minutes until the “song” was over. Samantha kept an eye on me, I could feel it.

“You don't like it?” She turned back around to look at me. “Finest work of humankind, right there.”

“I've… heard much more pleasant things from humankind, if you don't mind me saying that.”

“Eh. Fair enough.”

Just as she was saying that, a ping sounded on the dashboard. We both focused, with Samantha pulling up the signal.

“Looks like a distress call.”

“Okay!” Anything to get her to stop playing that godsforsaken music.

We made our way out to the distress signal, with Samantha silently focusing on steering, and me trying to keep myself still. I'll admit, it's been an adjustment, being with Sam. Whenever we get dressed, she simply tears her clothes off and throws some other ones on. I at least try to get dressed in the bathroom, so she doesn't need to see me. And her taste in music is certainly… interesting. 

It was not a planet we were going to anchor onto… it was another spaceship. A Hauler class, gigantic and intimidating. It looked as if there was a massive explosion on the outside of the hull… except the scratches and torn metal pointed inward rather than outward.

I was confused by this. I turned to Samantha. “Do you think the…”

She was on the same wavelength as me. “The damage isn't right. Looks like something came in, rather than something going out.”

She scanned the ship for any signs of life, and it came back with just one. We couldn't identify exactly who it was. But any life was worth saving. We looked to each other with a nod, and anchored ourselves right next to the ship.

We slipped on our suits and helmets. Samantha checked our radios, doing it right this time. Once we were ready, we walked into the airlock, sealed our own ship's entrance, and slowly floated into the cold, unforgiving void.

“What do you think caused this?” I called over to Samantha.

She shook her head. “No idea. My hunch is that something wanted in very badly, though.”

“Bad enough to force its way in…” I finished the thought, with a sinking, dreadful feeling in my stomach. Part of me wanted to tell her not to go in there… but it was our job to answer distress calls. If there's someone alive in there, we needed to rescue them.

We landed through the hole in the ship, and various sirens and lights blared and blinked silently in the void. I stuck closely to Samantha, as she was the one who thought to bring weapons.

As if we were both too afraid to announce our presence, neither of us spoke. We just floated our way down the dark, dreary hallways of the Hauler, with random debris, tables, and garbage scattered through the space.

Samantha grabbed my arm to stop me. I looked at her, and she looked ahead, pointing to a moving shadow.

“What was that?” I whispered over the radio.

“I don't know.” She kept her voice low, reaching for one of her pistols. “Stay close.”

I suppose that was one thing I liked about her—how she took charge. And clearly protective of her crew… I'm sure she would do the same for any other crewmate, as well. So she wasn't all annoying and no substance. Not to say she was annoying… I just mean… I don't know. I was getting distracted.

I kept my hands on her shoulders, floating gently behind her as she took the lead. I could have sworn I had felt some kind of vibration from outside, but it was difficult to tell with the helmet on.

She opened the door ahead, where the shadow disappeared to, and we found a cafeteria struck by death. Floating bodies, old blood, dried and hardened by the cold clutches of space. I felt sick to my stomach; Samantha kept going despite this.

She stopped, watching through a door's window closely. I peered inside with her, scanning through what little light was within…

And then something moved. It took up a shadow nearby, and when it darted away, the shadow was gone. It was there the whole time. I jolted at the realization.

“Easy… it's okay.” Samantha gently grasped my arm again, pulling me forward as she opened the next door. Her consolation did very little, though I appreciated the effort. Nothing could soothe my nerves at this point.

We dove deeper down, further within the heart of the Hauler, with Samantha's pistol at the ready and my own quivering self uselessly following behind. Soon we reached a dead end… it was almost pitch black.

She reached for her flashlight on her chest. When it turned on, it revealed eyes. Many of them.

She aimed her pistol, but both of us jumped at a terrible screeching through our radios. The shadow of eyes scrambled around us, a cornered animal, then leapt towards Samantha.

Her nerves were only shot for a moment, as she honed back in on the task at hand. She fired multiple times at the beast, but the bullets simply sunk into a disgusting excuse for flesh, absorbing them like they were nothing. It tackled her and thrashed her against the wall, and I immediately got an alert for her air tank becoming damaged.

“By the gods…!” I flailed in mid-air for a moment as I lost my grip on Samantha, then flew elsewhere to scramble for some kind of weapon. I found a rusted pipe on the ceiling, and tore it down with some effort. Then I launched myself from the ceiling, attacking the beast upside-down.

I hit a large eyeball, and the screeching in our radio crackled it, almost shattering my eardrums. More eyes turned toward me.

“Veth!” Samantha's voice barely made it through the noise. “Scatter!”

I didn't need to hear that order twice. The creature slapped its limbs of tar and darkness towards me, and I used my suit's boost to launch out of the way. It was completely focused on me now, and I had no idea how in the seven hells we were going to kill this thing.

We both fled the scene, and this monster had difficulty deciding who to chase. So it just chased both of us at the same time. It tore its own flesh in half, black tar and tendrils stitching its own bodies back together. Now there were fucking two of them. And one of them was coming right for me.

I scanned my environment for something to slow it down, scrambling past garbage and filing cabinets, shoving myself forward as the creature screamed in my radio. I heard Samantha try to yell for me, but I couldn't make it out over the monster’s noise.

I was completely on my own. And there was no way I was going to lead this thing to our ship next.

We had to kill it.

I followed signs for an engine, fleeing my way beyond the monster, and just barely escaped its lengthy grasp as I shoved the next door open. I tried sealing the door by pushing something against it, but the creature slowly pushed its way into the door's cracked opening. I was running on limited time.

I floated away, trying to think. This monster was able to survive in the freezing clutches of space just fine. So what if it had resistance to cold… and weakness to heat…

I would try anything, at this point. I watched Samantha's alarm in my HUD flash from yellow to orange, likely fighting her own beast. But we were both running out of time.

“Come on…” I bonked against one of the engines, fiddling with the wiring and trying to turn it back on. It rumbled as it attempted to do so, and I waited for the monster to squish its way through the engine room's doorway.

Once it was completely free, it scrambled to come find me, its screaming slowly becoming more and more evident in my radio. I hid behind the engine for just a few more seconds…

And once it reached me, I shoved some of it into the flames of the engine, to which a reply of pained screaming pierced my brain. I struggled to keep my focus, leaning as close as I possibly could to the engine's fire so the rest of this wretched thing would melt in the heat.

It lost its grip on me as it flew into outer space, out of a gaping hole in the engine room, charred and dead. The noise was gone. Samantha was calling for me.

“Vethailet!” I finally heard her past the deathly screams. “Say something!”

“I'm here!” I launched my way back out of the engine room, scanning frantically for her signal.

“Rrrgh… bridge! The bridge!” She was out of breath and crackling as the second beast wrestled with her. Her alarm in my HUD flashed red. “It cracked my helmet!”

“I'm coming!” I fumbled for an emergency kit half-floating against one of the walls, looking for a flare gun, then flew upstairs towards the bridge.

It took longer than I was hoping for, frantically following signs and maps scattered throughout the halls, but I finally made it. I was wondering why she had gone worryingly silent—I got my answer once I got there.

Half of her body was overtaken by the beast, flickering tendrils and tar starting to eat away through her suit. I shakily aimed my flare gun, checking for a flare within it, and fired at one of its eyes.

The flare's heat scattered the beast's body, with a horrible screech once again almost shattering my own helmet. It detached from Samantha, who was struggling in zero-gravity, and launched itself at me.

I quickly reloaded my flare gun, using my suit to stay steady, and right as its mouth opened to attack me, I shot it again. The flames of the flare forced the entire body to spike out in every direction, before finally bubbling and sizzling into a lifeless pile of tar.

I took a second to catch my breath, then hovered towards Samantha. Her radio was silent; she was gasping without air. I flipped up her visor, reaching for one of my rescue masks on my person, and kept her close as I wrapped it inside her helmet and onto her face.

I saw coughing from her, and eventually her vital signs on my HUD came back from a blinking red. I couldn't hear her on account of the helmet running out of air, but I felt her grasp at my arms, keeping herself steady.

Our eyes locked for a moment, with Sam breathing steadily… and she couldn't help but crack a smile. I did not understand why in the hells she was smiling, but I just ignored it and roped her against me with a carabiner. I was not about to lose another crewmate again.

We slowly made our way back, silent but on guard, until we settled back into our own airlock on the Striker. 

When gravity affected us again, Samantha fell to her knees. She tore her mask off. “Fuck, dude.”

“Are—are you okay?” I scrambled to catch her, but she was already on the floor. 

She shoved my arm away. “I'm good… I'm good. I promise. I just… I need a minute.”

“Okay.” The next door opened for us to retreat into safety. I held out my hands. “You need help getting up?”

“No, I'm okay.” She eventually stood up on one knee, then slowly back up on her feet. She was shaken up, yes, but surprisingly tough. It took me several seconds to realize she had sustained damage to her suit and her person.

“Let me look at you. It's my job.” I stopped her from walking further, and she rolled her eyes as I assessed the damage. Some cuts and bruises, as well as some paleness, but otherwise fine. My alert system would have told me if she was in grave danger. “How are you feeling?”

“Fine.” 

As expected, I needed to dig. “Okay. Now how are you really feeling?”

She threw her arms out, scoffing. “I… I guess I'm kinda lightheaded.”

“Better. Where does it hurt the worst?”

“My head.”

I slid off her broken helmet, and found an actively bleeding wound on her head. I let out a sigh, gesturing to one of the beds. “Sit.”

She sat, begrudgingly. “It's nothing major, Veth.”

“I take no chances.” I got a little closer, examining her head, and took one of my many little kits of supplies to clean and patch up the wound.

She actively avoided looking at me as I worked… barely flinched when I cleaned the wound, either. I couldn't help but wonder if she was angry with me… I was just trying to do my job. I knew our bosses would prefer that I do my job, and I wondered if she was so resistant on her previous jobs.

I felt her head waver. I collected her head into my hands. “Feeling okay, Sam?”

She looked up at me finally, with a distant look of fatigue. She seemed to rest the weight of her head into my hands, finally offering some trust. This excited me—I felt like I could actually do some work now. Her face was funny when it squished like that. I couldn't hide my smile.

“You did good, Veth…” She finally said something while I worked. “Never woulda thought to use flares.”

“Well, I figured it didn't like the heat, since it can resist the coldness of space…” I started explaining, but after a second, I realized she didn’t really care. “...Thanks, Sam.”

“Mhm.”

I wrapped some gauze around the wound as a finishing touch, then gave her a small pat on the shoulder. “You're all good. I think you lost some blood, though, so make sure you eat something.”

“You got it, doc.” She laid down instead. Of course.

I could only chuckle quietly, deciding to take the pilot's seat now and ride our way out of this death trap. The longer we stayed, the more nervous I got, so we moved out towards more empty space.

I documented our encounter, making sure to note that the environment was too hostile to make any proper rescues, and one crewmate was injured in the process. I was certain our bosses would show some leniency given the circumstances… but I do wish we'd have taken a closer look.

Maybe the “distress signal” was actually a lure, though. A call from the beast, to lure unsuspecting victims inside.

I didn't want to think about that possibility. I just finished my report, and rested in the seat.

Samantha had fallen asleep. I let her rest. Humans looked cute when they were all curled up like that.

[essayofthoughts]

interesting! without spoiling anything, are you thinking of the possibility of restoring tiefling!percy to his original form?

I've been talking with @blorbologist about that a lot! Because the thing is, I don't think Percy would ever be anything but horribly dysphoric about a body he was forcibly changed to and that he does not identify with. A body which inherently and permanently marks one of the worst mistakes he believes he ever made and which he cannot escape. I think he has days that are easier to bear than others, but I don't think he ever really thinks of his horns or tail or claws or fangs as his - they're always the horns or the tail or the claws or the fangs, always held at a remove.

And that kind of means his entire life sucks if he isn't able to change back!

Now, until Caleb comes up with the spell to help Nott/Veth I don't think there really is anything that'd do that permanently aside from Wish and given Percy's distrust of magic at the best of times, let alone something that phenomenally powerful being cast by Scanlan... I am inclined to say he is hesitant to say the least.

Not to mention the fact that, as a member of Vox Machina and a member of the leading council of Whitestone he is a well-known and prominent tiefling. He is an example against bigotry towards tieflings and likely a source of hope for some! And Percy is noble; as he says after Scanlan leaves, none of them are solely their own people - they are inherently tied to those around them and expectations. The presence of the public eye has a hugely limiting effect on what is acceptable for him to do.

He could change himself back once the spell is available - but what would that mean for and imply to those tieflings who've looked up to him as a prominent, positive role model? If he'd turn himself human again? The implicit suggestion that he has always been ashamed of himself and that, if he was, they should be too. That question he has to weigh - is his comfort worth the negative effect it'd have on uncounted people? And Percy doesn't think highly of himself as an individual. He thinks plenty of himself as a de Rolo, as a member of Vox Machina, but he also kind of hates himself a lot, and likely even more in this AU? Why would he believe he deserves something kind and good when as he is he can help so many others?

So I think if he does change himself back to human it is at the urging of Vex and his children - especially his tiefling children - and not so much himself. I think he dabbles in the idea a little, using Alter Self coins from Tary (which would likely startle the hell out of Vex the first time) - but again, I think he'd be very hesitant to do that once he and Vex have children, because what kind of message is he sending to any tiefling children of his if he chooses to take human form sometimes? If he rejects being a tiefling like that? I think that's a conversation he has to have with each of them at some point (and maybe I've been noodling with a lil fic chunk for that maybe).

But yeah. I'm not decided yet on if he does turn back to human but I'm very sure that he wants to and has complicated feelings about whether he's 'allowed' to.

[grayintogreen]

WIP WEDNESDAY

I'm about halfway done with this chapter since, again, it's a long one and it's taking a bit more time than expected to finish due to length and the fact that I'm in the middle of inventory prep, SO here's a nice chunky WIP Wednesday.

It's also a very sad one, so you know. Happy Wednesday, have some Jester sadness.

-

When Nott- no Veth, no but she was Nott then, but she was also always Veth oh whatever- was first learning how to shoot firearms, Jester had been curious about them. She’d seen them worn on the hips of travelers coming into the Chateau and knew the exact sound they made when the belts containing them hit the polished wooden floor of her mother’s quarters. Once, from the secret place she watched all manner of exploits, she’d observed an old man from Tal’Dorei, who bragged about being a rifleman to anyone who would listen before going up, show off his collection. She had to stifle a giggle as her mother suggestively dragged her fingers down each polished barrel and spoke in clever innuendo all while praising him for considerable talents he’d only spoken about but never proven. He wouldn’t need to- the beauty of being in the Ruby of the Sea’s sights is that no matter what you told her, she would believe with her whole heart until the second you were no longer within those walls.

So with that in mind, it meant that Jester had never seen one used until she started watching Nott firing off round after round and, of course, she wanted to see up close now that she could. The resulting tinnitus had lasted for hours until Caduceus took pity on her and used a restoration spell to restore her hearing. The memory of that feeling never really went away and she went from being curious about guns to wanting to be as far from the field from them as possible.

Right now it felt like someone had fired a gun right next to her ear, leaving everything ringing like someone had hit a bell inside her head. Toll the dead, laughed some kneejerk little thought that didn’t belong here. It was the only series of words that made any sense to her at this moment- everything else was far away.

Her eyes hadn’t moved from Fjord’s crumpled form. If she took a step closer, his blood would touch her boots from where it was still pooling out beneath him. His skin was ashen, his eyes wide open and unfocused and staring right at her- oh gods.

But if she didn’t look at his eyes, she would have to look at the gory mess of his ripped open stomach, and if she turned around, she would run to the other side of the ship and start crying and throwing up and she couldn’t afford to do that. Heal him! Another voice, this one livid, shouted at her. You’re running out of time!

I didn’t bring any diamonds.

No one had. Cree and Caduceus were two feet from her, whispering frantically, their words sounding warped like she was hearing them from underwater. “My bag is in the officer’s quarters, but I will not make it back within a minute. And I burned all of my bigger spells on the fucking dragon turtle.”

“I did too. We can… We can try in the morning.”

The ringing still wouldn’t subside, like it was trying to keep her distant from reality by providing some kind of buffer, so when Jester choked, she thought it was softer than it actually was, because she could barely hear it. Cree and Caduceus jerked their heads to look directly at her for the first time since she’d screamed and she backed away from everyone’s desperate, comforting hands, because she didn’t want to be touched, she didn’t deserve it, because if she had been with Fjord, then this wouldn’t be happening.

She’d just wanted to sleep in the mansion, that was all. It wasn’t like they were fighting. Fjord preferred the captain’s quarters and when Jester shared his bed, she never got to cuddle with the mansion cats, so it felt like a fine compromise. She’d kissed him good-night as they both limped away and she’d fallen into a deep, exhausted slumber in a pile of cats until she was woken barely an hour later by Cree sounding an alarm.

She’d just grabbed her sickle because she didn’t have any spells left. She hadn’t thought anyone was going to die. And now Fjord was dead and they were going to have to leave him like this and she couldn’t, she couldn’t-

“We have to do something,” she said, because choking wasn’t conducive to actually explaining her feelings. Her voice didn’t sound like her own even beyond the distortion. It was like someone else was speaking and that person was on the verge of a panic attack. That was strange. Everything felt so numb and yet… was she shaking? Was that her heart thudding like that? “We can’t leave him like this.”

Caduceus started talking the way he did when there was grief to be consoled and she slapped her hands over her ears to block out the garbled noise of it, childishly. Now everything was muted but the ringing and the thud, thud, thud of her heart that she felt strangely distanced from. She shut her eyes so she wouldn’t see his lips move or the offended way he would look at her when he realized she was shutting him out.

She counted to ten and opened her eyes. Caduceus, shoulders drooped in something akin to defeat, had knelt down beside Fjord and was casting magic on him- gentle repose and a small healing spell to close up the wound on his stomach and keep his insides in place.

The urge to vomit came again and this time it wouldn’t be ignored simply because she was disassociating. She ran to the rail and threw up so hard that she was yanked back into her body and felt everything tenfold- every ache and pain from the battle, every bruise left by the weight of her grief. She cried and choked and hyperventilated and mumbled it’s all my fault between heaves and didn’t stop until she was pulled against a soft furry chest and a rumbling purr began to vibrate through her entire body.

“It is not your fault, Jester,” Cree murmured.

“I should have been with h-him,” she hiccuped. She couldn’t admit that to anyone else- just Cree. Cree understood what it was like to be a cleric and let someone you loved slip through your hands.

“Do not blame yourself- blame me, if you must blame anyone aside from the ones who hurt him. I was close by and I sensed nothing. They got by us all.”

She wasn’t going to blame Cree any more than she was going to blame Yasha, feet away and being held up by Molly and Beau. The look on her face said she would break if anyone came close to blaming her and proving what she likely already believed and Jester would have fought anyone who tried. It was easier to blame herself for being selfish and choosing a bunch of cats over Fjord.

“I don’t wanna wait,” Jester whimpered into Cree’s chest. “What if he doesn’t come back? What if Uk’otoa has his soul or something and the ritual doesn’t work?”

“We do not have any other choice.”

She could argue for hours and get nowhere and only make it that much harder. If the three of them didn’t sleep, then there wouldn’t be any bringing Fjord back at all, but how was she supposed to sleep knowing Fjord was dead? Shouldn’t someone watch him in case Malachi came back?

“Th-they were after that crystal inside of him,” she sniffed. “We can’t leave him alone. I’ll stay up with him.”

“You will not be able to do the ritual.”

Jester laughed pathetically. “I can’t be the one to do it. I’ll fuck it up. You gotta do it, Cree. I’ll… I’ll help, but…”

But Cree worshiped a demigod of death. She had sway there. The only ritual she’d ever successfully helmed was the one that saved Yasha back in Eiselcross, and that was because no one else was willing to try it until Artie told her she should. She trusted Cree’s spellwork more right now.

“I will perform the ritual, then,” Cree sighed. “But please, Jester, I will not sleep well unless I know you are not causing yourself any harm.”

Of course she was causing herself harm- she’d decided to lock herself up in the captain’s quarters with Fjord’s body and would hear absolutely nothing else about it. That was going to fuck with her and leave her haunted. There was no sugarcoating it, no pretending that she could make a game of it. It was just going to happen and the consequences of it would be compartmentalized until she could deal with them properly, just like always.

“I have to stay with him,” she repeated, simply, and then pulled away from the comfort of Cree’s arms to go and collect Fjord- no, Fjord’s body. He was so much heavier now that he’d gained some muscle, but he still felt too light when she lifted him up in a bridal carry, his head lolling against her shoulder. It was like the absence of his soul was something felt all the way down into his bones.

Orly played a soft dirge of inspiration for her because he couldn’t offer anything else. She held the spark of it in her heart not knowing if she would have any use for it tonight, but grateful all the same for the gift. Marius held the door to the captain’s quarters open for her and then shut it behind her, leaving her alone to lay Fjord’s limp form down on his bed.

There was blood on the sheets and, in desperation to be rid of the sign, she tore them out from under him, only to find that he’d bled straight through to the mattress. Furious, she balled the sheets up in her hands, and threw them out into the ocean where she watched them sink beneath the waves as the Ball-Eater continued its course towards Rumblecusp.

She looked over her shoulder. She’d left the doors leading back into the quarter’s thrown open and she could see a bit of ashen green in the corner. If she really put her mind to it, she could believe he was just sleeping and she’d just stepped out here to get some air.

Her breath hitched. What good was it to pretend? For another eight hours, Fjord was gone and getting farther and farther away. She dropped to the floor and pressed herself into a corner of the balcony with her knees drawn up to her chin. Yeah, you’re gonna do so good watching for danger out here, Jester. You’re so stupid and selfish. First you leave him alone to sleep with a bunch of spectral cats and now you can’t even sit next to his body.

“You’re being awfully hard on yourself, my dear.”

Her head shot up. Leaning against the wall in the space between the balcony and Fjord’s quarters was Artagan, hood down and the lion’s mane of his hair falling freely across his shoulders and down his back. His arms were crossed over his chest and the long tapered fingers of his left hand tapped a steady rhythm on his right bicep. He was staring a spot across from him where nothing was suggesting he was looking beyond what was physically present.

Slowly, Jester got to her feet, catching herself on the railing when she lost her footing- how long had she been sitting there spiraling? Long enough for her foot to go to sleep. She hissed and shook it out, trying to get the tingles to go away. “What are you doing here, Artie?”

She didn’t mean for it to sound accusatory, but it came out that way, regardless. She pressed her tongue to the roof of her mouth and took an unsteady step forward. “I mean… I figured you’d be…” Where? On Rumblecusp watching his big plan spiral out of his control? Keeping an eye on Twiggy so they could find her easily when they finally got there? Drinking cocktails on some other island and absolutely ignoring any responsibilities he might have?

Right. It was no more fair for her to be hard on him than it was for her to be hard on herself. She took a step back and pressed herself against the rail again. “Sorry.”

“What do you have to be sorry about, Jester? You didn’t gut him where he stood. I didn’t either, of course.” Maybe with anyone else that would have been shouted defensively, but to her ears, it barely sounded like a statement of fact. Or maybe she was just too used to defending everything he did and said without considering context.

Shut up. Shut up. Artie’s my friend. He’s done so much for me. There’s no fucking reason for you to be mean. The you here being the shitty little voice that had taken up residence in her brain and decided to be a dick instead of helpful. When there was nothing else left to hit, you punched at yourself and everyone around you.

Artagan took his eyes off of whatever faraway place he’d trained them on. “That was going to happen the next time he set foot on the ocean, regardless of why and when.”

That bitter little voice said could’ve warned me and she bit it off before she could let it slip out loud. What would it have done to know? Made them more careful, sure, but would that have been enough? Maybe Fjord went willingly instead of having to be ripped apart to save them all. Maybe there was no body to preserve and resurrect in that version.

She blew a raspberry. “Is there any way to make it stop?”

“I think you know exactly what they were after and how much trouble they went through to try and get it. Your purple friend pulled out a gambit that won’t work twice.”

Because they only had one more of those stupid crystals and it was in Fjord. That explained why they were trying to open him up like a fish. Malachi might have made off with the one Molly threw away to take it to the temple they’d avoided with Avantika, but now there was one left and once they had that one…

Fjord could get rid of it somewhere far from the sea like they talked about doing, but that was the only way that would work. The other option was that he never went back to the sea and if she were going to ask him to do that, she might as well not bring him back. The oaths he swore to the Wildmother were out on the waves- part of his soul was out here. Land would be a cage and a prison for him no matter how far they walked if he knew that he would never sail again.

“Maybe we just kill Uk’otoa then,” she grumbled, petulantly.

Artagan laughed. “I have no doubt you could, my dear, but you have enough gods and monsters on your dance card as it stands.” He lifted an arm and gestured her closer and no bitter voices or dark thoughts could make her stay still and stand alone when given the opportunity to burrow into the folds of his cloak and curl against his side. She inhaled deeply until her nose burned with the crisp, spicy scent of evergreen that conjured images of thick forests of pine trees like arrows pointing towards candy pink skies.

It took barely a minute for her joy to become sorrow again as she wept into his side like someone had punctured a hole in her heart and this was all she had to bleed out. She was frustrated and tired and angry and confused and this whole journey had barely started and even if it wasn’t her fault, it all felt like her fault. She bit her tongue until she tasted her own blood and clung tighter to Artagan’s body like she could hold him here and refuse to let him go.

Artagan had clearly never suffered a young woman bawling on him like this and did nothing but stand still like a statue with his arm around her shoulders and mumble awkward, desperate pleas for her to stop crying, that it would be all right, and that it would all seem less like an absolute disaster in the morning. It was shockingly mortal of him, like he was trying to figure out how to mimic compassion by what he’d observed from others, because he otherwise had no context for it. It was enough to make her laugh through the least of her sobs.

“Promise me something, Artie?” She finally forced out when she could form a sentence that wasn’t some stumbling, stuttering mess. “Promise me when this is over, you won’t leave me.”

His tongue clicked against the roof of his mouth as he hissed like he’d been scalded. She was afraid to look up into his face, afraid of what she’d see there. “I’ll do my best.”

She made the decision not to ruin the only comfort she had for this long, agonizing eight hour wait by pointing out how that wasn’t a promise. Like many things that troubled her that she didn’t have the energy to be upset about or analyze, she pushed it aside to be forgotten in order to simply take joy in what she had currently.

[blorbologist]

in preparation for tonight's reunion! what are some of your hcs m9 post campaign? and what are you hoping to see in the two shot?

OHHHHHH god I'm so excited, I've got wine on standby! I don’t think my M9 HCs are too far out of the usual ones? Let's see what I can dig up

Not the M9 directly, but Astrid and Eadwulf live in a house a few doors down from Beauyasha. Either they're married or QPP, either way it's hilarious

I subscribe to Plank King Kingsley theory, I love it!

Caleb uses transmutation magic to spay/neuter the Rexxentrum cats because as much as he'd like to he can't take them all in and no cat should be born on the streets :c

I think at one point after a long discussion, Essek gets Transmorgified into some other kind of elf, or at least a very different looking drow, because the risks if he's found out are way too high. Sometime before Caleb dies they change him back. Veth is there for the first casting, given Essek helped develop this spell that got her body back and is now giving him a little more freedom to live his life, too.

As for hopes for the twoshot...

I! WANT! ESSEK! MY BLORBO MY EVIL PHD STUDENT MY GRAPE OF A FLOATING MAN.

I hope it's at least two years in the future, if not happening roughly when C3 is - to allow time for the Nein to be settled into their post-canon lives and healed a bit.

SOMEONE either expecting a kid or adopting one. Laura dropped the 'Vex is pregnant' bomb during Search for Bob so I wouldn't be surprised if she pulled something similar here, but could be someone else's turn. Veth included! Veth having another kid on the way would actually be a riot holy shit

Luc update! I want to know about his magic lessons and his crossbow usage.

Anything about the Apogee Solstice - does anyone in the Nein know about it? Do the entities they're connected to have an interest? Thinking mainly Ludinus Da'leth, Uk'otoa, Artagan, hell Essek might have thoughts on it.

Speaking of: Artagan insights into some Feywild bullshit!

Domestic Fjester! Domestic Beauyasha! Domestic Shadogast? Domestic Brenattos!

I hope we get more insight into Kingsley's personality! I wanna get a good feel for him.

I wanna know why Cad isn't coming, in-universe. Just gimme a reason, no big!

I'd love Jester and Beau to have a moment as besties, because I missed that late C2, though I understand if they don't go for it because of Beaujester drama remnants.

Is Yussa in trouble Again?

I wanna see Uk'otoa. Not just seal him away. Stab him in the eyeball.

Frumpkin sighting?

A very very minor thing, but if there's any Assembly lore tied to Delilah I'll go feral. Caleb. Caleb pull through for me. Gimme the deets on academic scandals.

This goes without saying, but I wanna say it anyways: I want the cast to have fun. I get so much enjoyment from seeing them have a riot - this is fundamentally their game and their characters and their story. My wants mean little to theirs - I hope they get everything they want out of it even if it’s not what the fandom wants and clearly have a blast.

[troubleisafriend]

EVENT STARTER CALL & INFORMATION: DOWN YOU GO

Both Jester and I are SO excited to do stuff for this event!! She's no stranger at all to dungeon crawling and seeking treasure! If there are dragons, all the better(maybe)! Going to make a starter call capped at 3, with previous interactions exempt. May drop in and plot stuff if I can't think of any good ideas- or let me know if you have an idea. Details irt the different biomes beneath the readmore!

Fantasy- Of course!! This is the whole thing she's used to! Fighting monsters and seeking out loot! This'll probably be the one she ends up in most unless I've got a real good idea for the others.

Space- Oh wow, this is not at all the kind of setting she's been in before. Luckily with all abilities unlocked she's got a whole array of spells sure to be able to hold off the unkillable alien, though she may not be particularly careful, especially in areas where it'd be good to be careful.

Sea- She's going to be absolutely delighted by this one! She's been on the sea for a long time and has definitely fantasized about being a mermaid. Can't guarantee she won't get distracted by everything around her, but that's part of the fun, right?

Jungle- This one definitely reminds her of some particularly unpleasant parts of her journey. She can likely survive, but she was never as good at seeking out traps as Veth, so expect her to be tripping some by accident.

[piratespencil]

Veth & Beauyasha! Either one is fine if you don't want to do both. :)

Veth

How I feel about this character: I love her!!! I love her so much. She is my favourite character in any CR campaign. I watched a single cr2 animatic with her in it and decided I had to start cr2. She's perfect. <3

Any/all the people I ship romantically with this character: Veth/Yeza of course!! Also Widobrave in any combination of romantic/platonic/somewhere in between is so compelling to me. (And by extension, Yeza/Veth/Caleb or Yeza/Veth/Caleb/Essek polyships...) Also in a more crackship kind of way, Veth/Fjord and Veth/Jester are fun! And Veth/Sunbreaker of course.

My favorite non-romantic relationship for this character: Veth & Jester besties!!

My unpopular opinion about this character: I don't know if I have any unpopular opinions about her?? I feel like most people I've seen agree that she's a good character! I'm surprised that more people don't ship Widobrave I guess?

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon: I'm only 70-something eps into cr2 so I don't know everything there is to know about Veth, but from the spoilers that I do know I think I'm pretty happy with her character arc!

Favorite friendship for this character: Veth & Caleb and Veth & Jester.... faves...

My crossover ship: More friendship than romance but I saw someone saying they'd like to see Veth and Chetney together and could you imagine.... the chaos...

Beauyasha

When I started shipping them: Right in episode 1!! I already knew they were endgame before I started cr2 but I didn't expect them to start flirting in the first episode and I loved them from there.

My thoughts: I love them!! Since I'm only 70-something eps into cr2 I feel like I haven't gotten into the really juicy Beauyasha content yet but I'm excited to get there!

What makes me happy about them: Very strong girlfriends getting to be soft with each other.... <3 <3 <3

What makes me sad about them: That Ashley is gone so often that I haven't gotten to see a lot of Beauyasha yet. :(

Things done in fanfic that annoys me: I haven't read a ton of Beauyasha fic but nothing I've read has annoyed me!

Things I look for in fanfic: I don't really go looking for Beauyasha fic... Maybe once I've seen more of them in canon!

My wishlist: Not sure!!! Need to see more of them first!

Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other: Beau/Jester is cute!! (Also Beau/Keg.... I really liked Keg dghlkfghfdl...) Yasha/Happiness....

My happily ever after for them: As far as I know their canon ending is pretty happily ever after!! <3

(Ask meme!)

[sankttealeaf]

air so sweet

read on ao3 here ; originally posted june '21

fandom ; critical role [campaign 2]

characters ; jester lavorre, fjord stone, caleb widogast, beauregard lionett, yasha nyoodrin, mollymauk tealeaf, veth brenatto, caduceus clay, frumpkin, sprinkle

summary ; the gang go camping for a class trip. it goes well.

other info ; college au / modern setting (but still set in wildemount), everyone lives au. snippets of happy times. veth goes by veth and not nott in this au.

3.8k words. this was written as part of my m9 college au i have going over on instagram <3 u don't need any prior knowledge to enjoy this piece tho!!

There was something about the forest that was incredibly peaceful. Perhaps it was the sound of birds singing, swooping low throughout the trees, or the bees buzzing and landing on a variety of wild flowers. Or maybe it was the sound of running water, a family of ducks swimming through it, making the most of the warm day. It was serene, something to capture in a photo, a calm day with nothing bad to happen-

SPLASH.

Loud laughter filled the air, yells of disgust and annoyance soon followed. Veth stood, clutching her stomach as she laughed at the soaked Fjord, who was now dragging himself out from the river he had been pushed into. Caduceus broke his attention from a cluster of berries to see what had happened, broke into a smile and shook his head, looking back to see if the berries were edible. They weren’t. 

“I’m going to get you back,” Fjord grumbled, wringing his shirt to try and get most of the water out from it. “The ice you were standing under has cracked, Veth.”

“Sure, sure, whatever you say,” she replied, waving him off. “Can we do it again, I want to record it this time. No one will believe me if I don’t have video proof.”

Fjord gestured to where Caduceus was crouched over, making notes in a small journal. “You have proof!” He then pointed to his clothes. “Even more proof!”

Veth made a noise, shaking her head. “Not enough, unfortunately.” She waved her phone at him, a grin on her face as he passed her, heading up towards the trail path.

“No. Nope. Not staying here any longer. I’m going back to camp.”

“Suit yourself! Can’t run away forever!”

Fjord ran a hand through his hair, flicking off the water droplets. At least it was warm, he supposed. The cool water was a nice compliment to the warmth of the sun on his skin. He grabbed his bag with his school notes in, things he was supposed to find and document to present to the class, and made his way back up the path, following the signs back to camp. He hadn’t really thought much about this project, kind of wishing they were at the coast instead. There was more to see in the ocean, and he was bored of watching the same family of ducks swim by, expecting food. He had no duck food to give. Curious as to what ducks were allowed to eat, he pulled out his phone, ready to search what ducks could eat. He was paying attention to where he was walking, not wanting to bump into anyone or anything, and didn't realise until a good few minutes later, that he had tweeted out the searches he wanted. 

Now the whole world knew he was looking up what to feed ducks.

When Fjord had left, Veth relaxed her shoulders, looking around the area to figure out her next plan of chaos. Her eyes met Caduceus, who was in a perfect place to be pushed into the bush he was gently taking leaves off of to press into his notebook. Carefully, she began to make her way over, having not alerted the firbolg of her scheme. As she reached him, her hands ready to shove, Caduceus held up his hand and without ever turning around, gently spoke.

“Don’t even think about it.”

“How the- What? I would never! C’mon, Decuey, I would never think about pushing you,” Veth said quickly, hiding her confusion of how the fuck Caduceus knew she was sneaking up on him. She brushed out her dress, flicked one of her braids behind her shoulder and spun around. “I’m going to find Caleb. Are you good here?”

Caduceus gave a hum of agreement, and she turned to follow the path back to find the rest of her friends. The ping of her phone alerted her to one of her friends tweeting, and saw Fjord talking about… ducks? What a weirdo. She subtweeted him.

----

Frumpkin was having the time of his life exploring the long grass, climbing over rocks and watching birds fly in the sky. Yasha and Jester had taken over Frumpkin duties for the day, while Caleb, Molly and Beau walked around. Jester wanted to find a spot to paint in, and Yasha wanted to add to her flower collection, so they settled on a little meadow a few minutes walk from the main campsite. The soft breeze that came every few moments was welcomed, as the two sat in between various flowers, many of which had been picked and placed on a small pile in front of them, ready to be weaved into flower crowns. Frumpkin was enjoying the sun, lazing in between the two, only opening his eyes when he felt either of them gently pat him. 

“Molly said your room is, like, a giant plant. Is that true?” Jester asked, leaning over to pick out a purple flower to add to her creation. “Like, not a real plant, but, y’know. Plants.”

Yasha laughed softly, handing Jester another purple flower she saw, which the other gratefully took. “I have many plants. Flowers, house plants, cacti, loads of them.” She took out her phone to show Jester a photo of her room. “Molly comes over to water them when I’m not here.”

“That’s a lot of pla- wait, what’s that? In that tank? You have fish??” Jester pointed to a tank on the top of a table, and Yasha zoomed in. 

“That’s Storm, my tarantula.”

“You have a spider?!” 

“Mhm! He’s very friendly, loves scratches.”

Jester’s eyes widened, and she shook her head. “The only spiders I know are the ones that come in my room, and Sprinkle usually eats them.”

“Is Sprinkle doing okay?” Yasha put her phone away, picking up the flower crown she was working on. 

“Yes! Do you want to see him?” Jester placed her crown down, turning around to pick up her rucksack, which was slightly opened. Yasha leaned over to look inside, and a small, red ferret- wait, no, weasel, poked his head out from it. “He’s been really good so far!! The best ferret I know!”

“Sprinkle’s a weasel,” Yasha pointed out, holding out her hand for Sprinkle to smell. Instead, he bit her.

“The guy I got him from said he was a ferret.” She picked Sprinkle up, holding him under his arms and pulling him close to her face. “Have you been lying to me, Sprinkle??”

Sprinkle squeaked, blinking up at Jester. 

“How do you know he’s a weasel?” She asked, pulling her weasel close to her with a frown. “I am sure glad I didn't file any paperwork for him.” “His tail is super long. Weasels have long tails, and are usually red,” Yasha told her, gently giving Frumpkin a scratch behind his ear, so he wouldn't feel left out.

“Wow. You sure do know a lot about stuff, Yasha,” Jester said with a smile, turning her attention back to Sprinkle. “You’re a bad weasel! You lied! No… uh… bugs for you anymore. Except I will, because you need to eat and I don’t want you to die. You need to meet all my friends!” She turned Sprinkle to face Yasha. “This is Yasha, Sprinkle! She’s super nice, okay? No more biting her anymore.”

Yasha laughed, as Sprinkle squeaked again and tried to wiggle from Jester’s hands. She gently placed him back in her bag, where he proceeded to curl into a ball and fall asleep. 

The two continued to add flowers to their crowns, making more when they realised they had picked more than needed. It was only fair that the rest of the group had flower crowns, too, right? Jester tried to pry any band secrets from Yasha, determined to know at least what the EP was about. She thought it wasn't going to work, but when she offered to braid flowers into her hair, Yasha caved, and gave her some top secret information about the EP.

----

“D’ya reckon you could hide a body in a tree?” Molly asked, leaning up against an oak tree as the trio took a break. He gave the trunk a hearty slap, immediately regretting doing so as his hand began to sting.

“Probably. You could cram one in there through the little holes they have in them,” Beau said, shooting him a strange look. “Planning on killing us?”

“Naaah, not yet. Caleb’s too cute to kill and you? Eh, I can take or leave you,” Molly teased, laughing as Beau playfully hit Molly’s arm.

“Jerk. You couldn’t kill me, anyway. The band would crumble! The fans would cry! Think of the fans, Molly.” Beau dramatically sighed, a grin across her face. The Orphanmakers had a small amount of hype building up around them, people across the campus knew who they were, and even outsiders had heard their music online. Jester had offered to make some merch for their next gig, to sell alongside CD’s and tapes. She also said it would be for her art project, too, though at this point she claimed everything was for her art project. 

Caleb, who had been sitting on a rock this whole time, spoke up, pulling his hair back out of his face. “How much longer is the walk, Beau?”

Beau shrugged, grabbing her water bottle from her bag. She saw a sign that there was a hiking trail and grabbed the first people she could to come with her. “No idea. I think we stopped seeing trail markers like, half an hour ago.”

“Huh.”

“It’s cool, we can just trace our steps back and hopefully get back to the campsite. If not, then I guess it’s survival of the fittest.” She took a swig of water, watching as Caleb’s face scrunched up in disgust at that. How he managed to be dragged along to this, he had no clue.

“As long as we don’t spend all day out here. I did have plans,” he told her, standing up and stretching out his back. 

“Your plans were to stay in your tent and read,” Molly noted, pushing himself from the tree and linking arms with Caleb. He reached over to grab Beau, and began to walk.

“Important plans,” Caleb added.

“Nerd plans. Look at us! Bunch of… nature guys!” Beau gestured with her free arm at the trail ahead of them. Tall trees lined their right, a meadow of wildflowers stretched on across their right. The beaten dirt path carried on straight, for how long, they did not know.

The trio kept walking, taking breaks every so often when Molly would complain that the sun was too warm on his beautiful face, or when Caleb grumbled that he was not enjoying it anymore, or when Beau got tired of swatting away bugs. They had been walking for what felt like hours, and were glad when they noticed trail markers start to make an appearance again. The wooden stakes with a faded red arrow were a sign of hope, that they were going to see civilization again, that… maybe they took a wrong turn at some point, because this trail was only supposed to take forty minutes. And they had been walking all day.

The sound of running water filled the air, and the moment they spotted the river, Molly ran straight for it. Beau followed, with Caleb trailing behind, searching for a spot to sit in the shade while the other two seemed to race towards the water. The two wasted no time kicking off their shoes and attempting to push the other in, laughing loudly and splashing the other. Molly called for Caleb to join them, but he wasn’t feeling like getting his clothes soaked, and without knowing how far away they were from the campsite, he didn't want to risk feeling uncomfortable. He sat back and watched Beau and Molly splash water at each other, laughing when Beau managed to dunk Molly under the water for a good few moments. 

He took out his phone, seeing a few messages from Veth sent an hour ago.

Veth (13:04): just pushed Fjord into a lake. Feeling good. How's your walk?

Veth (13:05): almost pushed Caduceus into a bush, life is coming up Veth!

Veth (13:05): might steal people’s left shoe. Just for fun. See you soon!!!!!!!!

Caleb smiled, scrolling through his messages just to read anything else he had missed. There were a few messages sent in the group chat he was in for the library workers. Essek made a comment about how they shouldn’t move the historical books, as they were in a good place right now. Caleb disagreed, thinking that a switch around would do the library good, but the conversation had ended a few hours before and he didn't think it was relevant to bring it back up. He could always mention it in person. 

As he turned his phone off, Molly and Beau walked up to him, exhausted from trying to drown each other, but with smiles on their faces.

“Want to keep walking? I feel like we’re close to camp,” Beau said, taking her hair down so it could dry quicker.

Caleb nodded, standing up. “Had fun?”

“Loads of fun,” Molly replied, giving Caleb a wink. “I’m starving. The quicker we get back to camp the better.”

They picked up their things, and continued on the path, following the markers. 

As they arrived back at the campsite, Caleb noticed Veth was sitting in front of the tents, focused on something on her phone. She looked up as the trio walked over, and waved at them. Whatever she had been laser focused on was gone, her phone in her pocket as she walked to meet them halfway.

“You guys took your time,” she said, hands on her hips. “Did you wear sunscreen? Drink enough? I’m kidding, if you die of heat stroke, I get first dibs on your belongings!” 

“As if you haven’t already gone through what we own,” Beau replied, hearing a hum of agreement from Veth. 

“Did you have fun with Fjord and Caduceus?” Caleb asked, looking around to see if he could spot them. They were over at the small, log cabin that held most of the needed facilities, bathrooms and showers and extra storage for important things. 

“I pushed Fjord into the water,” she told them, beginning to go into extreme detail about her exact moves and thoughts behind how she did it. 

Fjord and Caduceus stood, exchanging notes from their research, preparing to compile everything together ready to present when they got back on campus. Fjord’s notes were messy, constant lines drawn to other clumps of text, linking it all together. It was hard to read, and even Fjord got lost when he tried explaining what he found to Caduceus. He had ignored Jester’s pleas to invest in nice stationery, determined to cram everything into a small notebook he was given during his late teens. Maybe he should buy a new notebook… Caduceus, on the other hand, had his notes laid out neatly, with space left to add small drawings of plants and animals he had seen throughout the day. It was organised, and well structured. 

They had plans to spend tomorrow documenting the different kinds of trees, and Fjord tried his best to sound excited. He wasn’t, wanting nothing more than to spend tomorrow doing something completely different. 

“SPRINKLE IS A WEASEL!”

She was heard before she was seen. Jester came running into the campground, almost bumping into other students as she made her way to Beau. Caleb, Molly and Veth. Yasha was following behind her, her bag full of the flower crowns they had made, Frumpkin on a little leash trotting in front of her.

“Hello to you too, Jes,” Beau said, watching as the tiefling came barreling towards them. She placed her hand on Molly’s shoulder, catching her breath.

“Sprinkle is a weasel . The seller totally lied to me, Beau!” Jester frowned, turning her back to her front to open it, Sprinkle still asleep. How the weasel slept through that was beyond everyone.

“Does it matter what Sprinkle is?” Molly asked, gently patting Jester’s hand. “How are you taking the news, anyway?”

“I’m so upset! What if I’ve been feeding him wrong this whole time??? Are weasels even allowed to eat sour gummy worms??” She exclaimed, earning confused looks from the group. A silence fell over them, each sharing the same thought. Jester looked between her friends, realizing that maybe she shouldn’t feed Sprinkle sour gummy worms. She gave her friends a nod, mumbling to Sprinkle about how she’s not sorry for feeding him sweet treats, and heading towards her tent. Yasha joined the group, pointing in confusion as Jester walked to her tent.

“Sprinkle is a weasel,” Caleb explained, and Yasha nodded.

“I thought she knew?” She said, handing Caleb Frumpkin’s leash. He gave her a smile, crouching down and giving Frumpkin scritches behind his ear.

Hues of orange and pink spread across the sky, the faintest glow of stars beginning to form as the sun began to dip below the horizon. The air was cool. Soft chatter came from the campsite, as different campfires were lit and people began to cook food for themselves. 

A fire has been set up in the Mighty Nein’s area, Fjord taking charge of it. He had seen Molly attempt to add a whole packet of matches onto it to “really make it stand out”, and was quick to ensure that it wouldn't happen… yet. They were tucked away in the corner of the campsite, away from the other students who had grouped up in their own circles, which was nice. It also meant that they could hoard the marshmallows from everyone else. Jester and Veth had made a big show of their stolen sweets when the other students had gone to check in that they had returned, and so far, no one seemed to know their bags of treats were missing. Which also meant the two were trying to eat them as fast as they could. Molly had said he would pay whoever ate the most (and kept them down), and the two have been at it ever since. 

Yasha had handed out the flower crowns she and Jester made during the day, and made sure to let Caleb know that Frumpkin, who was currently curled up on his lap, had been a good boy and deserved many treats. Molly had brought his guitar along, determined to play at least one generic campfire song he knew before being told to shut up. The added music was welcomed, even if most of the time it was him just making up strumming patterns as he went on. 

Beau and Caduceus were in a deep conversation about the science behind tea, and how anything can be a kind of tea if you weren’t a coward. She was listing off ingredients that she was certain couldn’t taste nice in a tea, and he would reply with what would work well in it and how he would make it. It was amazing, and slightly concerning that his knowledge was so vast. Most of the time, Beau was certain there was nothing happening in Caduceus’ mind, he always seemed… out of it? High? Yeah, that was probably the right word. But she was determined to find a thing to add to a tea blend that wouldn't work, and he kept surprising her. 

Jester sat beside Beau, making s’mores and handing them to Fjord, attempting to make the biggest s’more in the world. She had told him that she read in an article that it was a real world record, and she wanted to beat it, though he wasn’t sure he believed her. In fact, his hands were starting to hurt and the melted marshmallow was beginning to get all over him, but she had at least four stacked up, it was too late to back out from it. While he was distracted with the s’mores mountain, Veth was stealing the marshmallows from his bag, adding it to her and Caleb’s when she saw they were running low. She had been almost caught a few times, but played it off by pretending she was pointing at the s’mores mountain, complimenting it - which only made Jester want to make it bigger. It was a perfect scheme, though he was beginning to run low on marshmallows now. 

Caleb sat with Molly and Yasha, Frumpkin asleep on his lap, listening to them workshop a new song. It was a back and forth between Yasha coming up with a set of lyrics, Molly playing some chords, Yasha changing the lyrics to fit, and then Molly playing it out. Caleb didn't know much about how the songwriting process worked, but it was interesting to hear how the two worked together. Their minds were so alike, he swore sometimes they just looked at each other and knew what the other was thinking. Molly would ask Caleb for his opinion when the two disagreed with something, and he would put in his two cents, though he made sure to let them know he was not as musically inclined as they were. 

The night crawled on, with the other students on the trip soon retreating to their tents when their fires died down. The Mighty Nein were determined to stay out for as long as they could, refusing to be the first one to retreat to their tents. 

“It’s like being in a bathhouse. You don’t wanna be the first one to go as everyone will see your ass,” Jester said through a mouthful of s’mores. She was slowly eating the giant s’more she had made, though had decided she wasn’t going to eat it all. The thought of being sick wasn’t a pleasant one.

“I’d have no shame showing you lot my ass. In fact, I’m taking this as my cue to sleep. I’m beat,” Molly said, standing up and picking up his guitar case. “Night!” With a wave of his hand, Molly retreated back to his tent. Once he had left, and had been the first one to leave the metaphorical bath, others soon followed suit. 

Caleb was the last to leave, watching the dying embers of the fire fizzle out. Veth had stayed behind to make sure he was alright, gave him a kiss on the cheek and told him to get some sleep at some point. He would, he promised. He just wanted to make sure the fire was out. When he became aware of how cold it was without the heat, he gently picked Frumpkin up into his arms, and made his way into his tent, glad to be able to sleep after a long day of walking. Tomorrow, he will sit and read. As a treat. Frumpkin curled up by his pillow, and they both drifted off to sleep.

[cranesofibycus]

I really appreciate how Matt plays Birdie. There are a lot of elements of her story and behavior that remind me of Veth. I always liked that Sam chose to play a mother, but that he made sure not to reduce her character to that. And Birdie feels the same. Yes, she (at least says that she) is motivated by her concern for her daughter, but she isn’t overly affectionate towards Fearne, this grown woman who Birdie has never really spent any time with. I get the feeling that Birdie cares for the concept of her daughter, rather than for the actual person she is. How could she care for her? She doesn’t know Fearne! And I think to some degree ‘protecting our daughter’ can become a very convenient abstract cause to cling to. To say “We are doing this for the greater good of keeping our daughter safe” is the kind of sentence that can justify any kind of morally ambiguous or downright illegal behavior and can even be twisted into a reason to leave the confines of what might have been expected of a more ‘traditional’ mother-daughter relationship. 

I think Birdie loves Fearne and cares for her deeply, just like Veth loved Luc. But when Nott was turned back into Veth she suddenly had to face the truth that while her goblin form may have started as a valid and true reason to keep her distance from Luc, it did at some point become a convenient ‘excuse’ to explore the world and travel with the Mighty Nein, something Veth just wanted to do (and had the right to want).

I really appreciate these explorations of what it means to be a mother and that motherhood can look and feel different to different people. Neither Birdie nor Veth are presented as bad mothers. They are presented as complex characters with their own wants and desires which might or might not align with their roles as mothers. You can feel that struggle in both of them (that they feel like they messed up somehow or missed out), but I feel like the narrative presents those feelings with a lot of compassion instead of condemnation, which is still so often the case when motherhood is discussed in popular media.

[stardustedknuckles]

Taking thoughts about the role of Matt's kindness in Critical Role to the next level, I find myself thinking about how one of the most powerful aspects of this entire story was the good faith that drove it. By which I mean: I hear people say that campaign 1 was more plot/bigger stakes - and technically they're right, but the stakes in campaign 2 and the stories being told reverberated on a personal level in a way that spits in the face of the more conventional message we get from so many stories these days along the lines of "well that's just how it is." Those are the stories that had us bracing for Jester to be let down by her mom and her dad, expecting nobody to follow up on Beau being kidnapped, waiting for Yeza to crack under the strain of Veth leaving so often. In the jaded mainstream we're used to, Vandran would've been callous and dismissive when they finally found him and Fjord would have realized he'd outgrown the sort of approval he was never going to get. Astrid and Eadwulf would have just been using Caleb, too broken to escape the cycle. Cynicism would've been so easily hidden under the guise of realism and hardly questioned. Even applauded. Let me emphasize: it still would have been a great story.

None of that happened. Instead, incredibly, Matt took every chance to love his friends through the very narrative itself in a more explicit way, one that wouldn't have matched the priorities of the first campaign but which shaped the second into something so extraordinary. The world we live in has been darkening in so many ways and there's something bright and healing about watching Matt craft a whole world around uplifting his friends' creations - validating them, avenging them, righting the sorts of tiny, personal wrongs we're so often powerless in our own day-to-day lives to affect. I think that's at the crux of what makes the Mighty Nein so personal to us all. It truly is the little things, and seeing personal struggles given as much weight and resolution as epics about kingdoms and dragons struck a chord the likes of which I'm not sure I'll ever see again.

The narrative conflicts of this story were so much more realistic than the first. But it made all the difference in the world that it was a realism presented through the eyes of people who believe in hope and light. And none more than the DM himself.

[theclockistickingwrite]

The Mighty Nein saved the world and almost no one knows, and I think that’s so fitting for this campaign. This campaign that has been so messy and grey and tangled, filled with random heists and accidental life altering events. There was no chroma conclave, no tour to the gods to beg for aid, no war council. There was always just this group of misfit assholes who stumbled into trouble and created chaos and ended up wanting to leave everything better than they found it to honor a friend.

One of the lines that Vex says in campaign one keeps coming back to me, “what kind of adventurer are you if you’ve never heard of Vox fucking Machina?”

And here’s the thing: very few people in Exandria have heard of the M9 in this way. Their name started as a joke, and has always been met with confusion (“but there are only seven of you?”). The people who will remember them the most are a bird-girl in a small town, a firbolg and her son; those they saved because they cared and because they could.

Of course, now they’re finally Nine, which is beautifully poetic in it’s own way. But they’ve always been welcoming and expanding their group. “Welcome to the Mighty Nein!” Veth said to Essek all that time ago: all huddled together on their ship, betrayed and broken and reeling. The Mighty Nein are not the heroes Vox Machina were. They’re messy and they don’t make sense, but goddamn do they care about each other. Everyone called Vox Machina a family, and they were. But the Mighty Nein have become a family in a different way, because this group of criminals and orphans and lost souls have learned how to love each other, and how to heal.

D&D campaigns are often about heroes, and campaign 2 of critical role certainly is, but the Mighty Nein have never been the heroes anyone expects.

They’re the heroes who have saved themselves and found themselves because they’ve saved each other. Because they said someone has to do something, even if it doesn’t make a difference, even if we just change one life. We have to try.

They’ve fought hard to love each other in the way they do now. From Fjord holding a sword to Caleb’s neck all that time ago, Yasha fleeing the group every other week, Molly’s death, Beau’s brashness, Nott’s secrets, they have come so very far. They’ve learned to trust each other, give second chances, and forgive. They’re not heroes in the traditional sense, but they’re heroes to each other. They’ve saved each other.

And if this campaign has been about anything, it’s been about that.

[sparring-spirals]

I’m not great at explaining my thoughts but last episode it hit me that in C2 Caleb was almost perfectly built to help Veth and now I look at Imogen who’s life has been going into people’s heads and Laudna who in the end game needs a person out of their head and I am shocked at how these things just keep lining up seemingly perfectly because I don’t think the cast collaborates to that level with character creation.

First of all, lets all take a Moment™ to appreciate Caleb and Veth, Partners In Crime My Beloveds. Codependent and desperate and holding each other so close. <3 <3

Second of all- oh yeah, the parallel of voices in heads and diving in and pulling out- very nice. God dammit Imogen and Laudna. 🥺

But, ah, allowing me to get on my soapbox for a moment:

I will say, that more than just a thing of character creation OR things conveniently lining up, I think its a testament to the casts ability to do collaborative, character driven storytelling. To craft a character is one thing, but to have that character grow and be shaped by the forces and other characters around it, to have that starting point and then lean into everything that grows around it rather than adhering to What You Made This Character For, is very difficult to do, and also facilitates incredible stories.

Humans love looking for patterns and common threads and taking little coincidences and turning them into stories, letting them grow off of that. Humans love stories about connections and growth and lives colliding and intertwining.

Coincidences can just be that, coincidences, and there are millions of them that happen constantly. When you take the time to flesh those out, to ascribe meaning to them, to follow through and reinforce, thats when they start becoming themes, and parallels, and character motifs, and they become THINGS, and- it gets fun! But this approach also requires you provide that space and flexibility for the organic coincidences to flourish, for all those possibilities to spin out and breathe and grow without getting too wrapped up in telling your specific story, in a specific way.

I think the nice thing about extended media with downtime and fluff and character spaces like CR is that if you give it the space, a lot of stories tell themselves. People will pick out patterns and meanings and thoroughlines, and some of them are intentional and a lot of them won't be. And as a story progresses, not all of them will get realized, not all of them can get realized. And. IMO. Thats fine, and to be expected.

In my opinion, good storytelling in this kind of medium is about that balance- about providing the flexibility and openness where you let the stories and characters grow on their own, you work with the people and characters and environment and let those organically shape your character and story and landscape. But you also, as you progress, to pick and choose what threads to follow, what threads to reinforce, and making sure there's that consistency, that whatever you choose makes you look back and go oh. Oh. Of course. Of course.

Anyway this is a lot of personal opinions about how stories and crunchy characters can be told and made and I'm not claiming its the Only or Best way. But, IMO, I think characters like Veth and Caleb and Imogen and Laudna are lovely examples of fascinating coincidence, intentional creations and actions, and collaborative, thoughtful character work by the cast, and I'm thrilled by it. :D