#I know I write and reblog a lot of Fallout 4 these days

[atombonniebaby]

Okay, but apparently, yesterday marked my 2yr autism diagnosis anniversary!

Needless to say...

I have embraced the fuck out of it!

Tumblr lets me share my favoritest little guy with other humans! I love you all!

There is a reason I like to take screenshots. (Note the mug warmer for all that coffee/tea I used to let go cold.)

All my Oversized 🙌🏻 COMFY🙌🏻 Tees ❤️

I'm also hanging with the cat (literally...I'm in a hammock chair!) - her name is Mia as she is a dick. (in an adoring way)

(Oh and it'll be 3yrs in October for the ADHD diagnosis...but I'll probably forget about that...so have an 'I didn't know I was ADHD' memory)

As you were...

[winged-wolf-s-collection-of-arts]

Come and Trick or Treat! Open all year :] tags updated Nov. 28

Intro?

Howdy!!! Pronouns —> she/he/they (no preference)

Wolfy (wolf character I doodle sometimes) is my blog mascot. Unreliable sleep schedule/forgetful/message notifs don’t show up- so if you need me uhhhh keep yelling until I notice? Hdfjhfg..

I love drawing, listening to game playthroughs, and looking at cute animals! Feel free to send an ask about anything.

——

Tags!!

Art tag: wolfys art

Cool art by pals: grand showcase of arts

Doc says something: wolf chats

Art months stuff (all of them!! general tag): Just Here To Have Fun

Kiley and co stuff (commonwealth): little wastrels

second fallout au (island, custom location for an rp): badlands crew

Misc fandom tags (unreliably tagged but I will start now): qsmp, good omens, fallout, bg3, whump stuff, starfield, doctor who

important/tagged consistently: psa, boost (urgent news), reblogging for future reference (general tips), promo (friends news), flashing images, bright colors

"You have to reblog!" And similar phrases: rebait

Minor misc tags: drawing tips, writing tips, cooking tips, fave,

Note- these are not tagged reliably: ghouls/zombies, blood, skeletons, suggestive (no explicit things here), bugs and spiders, guns, drug use, smoking, all caps

——

Unimportant ramblings v

Time stamp: Jul 15? Heeeeey. Hello. So I did take a break from art till like last week, but uh, the health has been a roller coaster-

I kinda cleaned the whole house compulsively multiple times. I dunno what to say about that. Went from the compulsion to be Always Drawing to Always Doing Chores, so it wasn’t really a break? It felt amazing for a little while, but I am so stressed inside ahagfhkhdf. Anywayssssss.

I realized that promising to do the art requests Later is just me returning to old behavior, like just... keeping it on the line so I /nobody gets a direct answer *when* it will be done. That makes my brain think it’s in the clear while the other artists are worried and unsure what’d happen. Andddd even though I did have the motivation to do animated group projects for a little while, a small thing completely knocked me into dropping everything else.

I know I *could* try to join more projects or do more requests, I’m not in a safe headspace where I wouldn’t be set off, and nobody should risk their project’s deadline for that-

TLDR I’m going to Try and fix things up on my end and stop myself from joining anything (that depends on Every artists effort). Even if I feel alright *now* I know there’s a lot of risk for *later*- just don’t let me in anything big and important even if I ask, please- for at least a year-

—— Timestamp: Slightly Before August

Gonna Try Ink Demonth this year- I’ll limit myself and not do something too detailed again hsdkfjzhk.

——

Timestamp: August 17

[cackles evilly] Ink Demonth Ink Demothhhhh- this is the furthest I’ve ever gotten in an art prompt month ever! ...even though I’m technically not on theme (Fallout instead of Batim). Trying to pace myself by alternating between a simple and detailed style. Hrrrh the yeehawgust prompts (cowboy theme!) look so cool but I won’t double up- but I will try to participate in the September AI-less-Whump month. (gore and dark subjects! I’ll tag everything properly of course.)

Also I’ve come to a realization- A dream of mine has been becoming famous for my art/animations, but uh- One, it isn’t realistic, and Two, posts getting like 200 notes freaks me out cfjhxfgh- Well, doing stuff for friends and others is just as cool. Y’all are awesome ^w^

——

Timestamp: Aughust ninteen

Wait actually I don’t need a reason to block people. I don’t need to tell you either. It’s been getting a bit too chummy around here (reference)

——

Timestamp: September 4

I didn’t finish the art month, but I got to day twenty! That’s pretty good. I’ll finish it up this month. I also gotta work on some ref sheet, finish a birthday gift, andddd clear the askbox.

——

Timestamp: September 29

Oeghhhh.... too many ideas, not enough time. So many comic ideas. And I gotta tamp down my love of angst dvhkdfbnsf, make sure it makes sense first!! Decided to keep the aus separate. Normal Game Stuff is happening in the Badlands mainland, uh, I don’t know what ending we’d go with but anyways. ....hm. Maybe there’s no sosu and the factions are not making any progress. But probably’d lean towards Institute ending if I had to choose now.

Hm. Well. Maybe I did not think. Uh well in the other au Kiley’s with the Minutemen, and Nate’s with the BoS, so... well I’m not sure how this is gonna go- I’ll keep drawing memes till I think of something cool.

——

Timestamp: October 24

Well uhhhh. I dropped the October art challenge pretty quick, unfortunately. I’ll continue in December maybe? I said I’d do a few days of Halltober, and I don’t want to go back on what I said.

I keep continuing and dropping the au stuff, but that just proves I can continue a project! Maybe!! Maybe. It’ssss a comedy, so uh I’m not worried about making a Deep Story or anything. It’ll be fiiiiine. Just little slice of life stuff.

I wwwwwill get caught up on requests and gifts-

[willinglyghoulified]

List 5 things that make you happy, then put this in the askbox for the Last 10 people Who reblogged something from you. Learn about your mutuals and followers. 🎠 But only if you want to, just have fun! 💖💖

Awe thank you!~ I love this sm! Answers are gonna get long-winded though T_T

5 Things That Make Me Happy:

Positive Feedback - has to be on the top of my list because this absolutely does breathe life into me. I started writing in the first place to make people happy. I do it because I love it and I want to share that love with others. I want to be the writer that makes people look forward to getting off work to read that new chapter or the reason they stayed up a little too late because they just had to know what happened next. I want my stories to be someone else's escape. And maybe one day, I'll be on their bookshelves, too. ♥

Genuine Friendships - they're so important to me. I'm someone who has very few friends and even fewer family, so if you're close to me, it means something. I'm all about chosen family, and it often reflects in my writing (one of my fav main characters has a tendency to adopt lonely misfits). With my friends, we're either just acquaintances or you're my goddamn sibling, there's really no in between, which is both a good and a bad quality trait.

Fucking Fallout - because it's the most immersive game I've ever played. I know a lot of the games get some hate throughout the fandom, but I genuinely love every installment that they come up with, because it continues the story. Even with all its flaws, I love all of 1, 2, 3, 4, NV, and 76. I'm more partial to 4 because I relate more to their characters, but NV had the superior storyline. ♥ I literally cannot get this game or these characters out of my head.

BTS - Okay hear me out on this one: I know BTS is a stereotypical K-Pop band, but I seriously love them as people. I don't like K-Pop normally, as a genre. I listened to "emo music" growing up (I was born in 1993 so the 2000s was where my favorite music really lied). I was also a troubled kid and I brought a lot of those insecurities and trauma to my adulthood, and my old bands just wasn't doing it anymore. The memories of teen angst mostly stressed me out. But then I found BTS, and their music and messages helped me SO MUCH as a young adult, well into later adulthood (I'm 29 now). I absolutely love them, and they make me happy with their genuine care and messages. Those 7 boys are some of my biggest inspirations in life, reminding me that I can do anything if I try hard enough. But you will NEVER catch me mixing my love for BTS with the Fallout stuff on this blog. I've noticed that liking K-Pop is a quick way to catch hate, so I keep my obsession with them to myself. I'm okay with that; I've done it for the last six years.

My Husband - as cheesy as it is to say, I have the best husband I could have asked for. STORY TIME: I met him in Kindergarten, and he was always getting me in trouble by making me laugh and the teacher kept telling us to be quiet. She had to separate us. I had a crush on him in 2nd grade. Then we didn't see each other again until middle school. We had gym class together in 6th grade. In 8th grade, we became best friends. He dated a friend of ours in 9th, and I thought that would help me get rid of the feelings I had for him because I was terrified I'd ruin our friendship if I made a move. It didn't work out between him and our friend, but he told me in 10th grade that he liked me a lot, and we really understood each other. (Honestly it "helped" that we both came from troubled/broken families and were both below poverty level.) When we got together, we were each other's first EVERYTHING. We were together all throughout high school with no complications, and our peers deemed us worthy of being prom king and queen in 12th grade even though we were the nerds who oftentimes got bullied. It was so surreal. We moved in together after high school. We went through a loooooot of bullshit. Being kicked out of houses, losing jobs, losing family members (deaths and otherwise) and we're pretty much inseparable now. We've been together for 14 years. He's supportive in everything I do, even if he doesn't always understand my obsessions. He believes in me. He knows I'm not going to thank him for doing the bare minimum (respecting me, listening to me, helping me, not expecting me to mother him, etc). He genuinely fucking loves me. And he's pretty damn handsome and funny, too. Icing on the cake. And after losing all the people that we have over the years, we're pretty much all that we've got left. But I wouldn't choose to live this life with anyone else.

[wheezykat]

I posted 1,983 times in 2022

7 posts created (0%)

1,976 posts reblogged (100%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@peachpety

@vukovich

@museiums

@ihopeyoubothstaysafefromharm

I tagged 530 of my posts in 2022

#drarry - 41 posts

#lmfao - 13 posts

#pansy mf parkinson - 11 posts

#drarry fanart - 9 posts

#i wanna live in a house filled with joy's art - 9 posts

#my baby is a real peach 🍑 - 9 posts

#stranger things - 8 posts

#harry potter - 8 posts

#ginsy - 8 posts

#draco malfoy - 8 posts

Longest Tag: 69 characters

#🤣❤💕👀🥺😊👍😂😘😍😏😭😀😅😩🥵🦝🔥🍵😐🌵😤😌📚🦊🥴👁😔😳🧋🏔🕯🍊😠🤔

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Chapters: 1/6 Fandom: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling Rating: Explicit Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter, Draco Malfoy/Others (Offscreen) Characters: Draco Malfoy, Harry Potter, Original Muggle Character(s) Additional Tags: Angst, It gets better I promise, Down and Out Draco Malfoy, Draco Malfoy in the Muggle World, Post-War, Harry Potter Epilogue What Epilogue | EWE, Sex Worker Draco Malfoy, Additional Warnings In Author's Note, Panic Attacks, Touch Averse Draco Malfoy, References to Depression, Implied/Referenced Dubious Consent, (not between drarry and offscreen), these warnings sound dark but i promise it's not all that, Eventual Happy Ending, Coffee Shops, Coffee Shop Owner Draco Malfoy, Explicit Sexual Content, Eventual Smut, there are SOME feelings in here, as per usual, Illustration by Babooshkart, (feat in ch 2), Angst and Hurt/Comfort Summary:

After the war, Draco tries to make a life in the Muggle world.

Potter keeps showing up.

14 notes - Posted September 24, 2022

#4

❤ last lines! ❤

Thanks @phd-mama for tagging me!!

I've been working like crazy instead of writing (s i g h) BUT. I do have something for this :) from my self indulgent Panama ginsy fic!

“Mmm, el mundo es un pañuelo,” Parkinson murmers, reaching up to twist her long black hair to one side, “Only so many places to go, Ginevra.” 

Tagging my best bbs and beans @amorsindolor @vukovich @peachpety @calypsotempete @wynnyfryd @secretartlair @academicdisaster24 @nv-md @fw00shy @the-sinking-ship

24 notes - Posted February 4, 2022

#3

drarry tag game

Thank you @calypsotempete and @vukovich for tagging me! How fun. Lol.

When did you get into Drarry and why? I was actually a Jily/Wolfstar shipper back in OG fandom days, and sometimes I would read Viktor/Hermione fic and drarry would be the side pairing. Anyhoo, got back into fandom in 2019 and went down the rabbit hole looking for some of my favorite older fics, somehow ended up in dramione-land and read practically every fic on AO3 for the pairing (I know this sounds crazy, and I wouldn’t believe it if it hadn’t happened to me 😂💀) and then was sad that I had read mostly everything. Dabbled a bit in Drarry fics, reading them at random while waiting for new WIP chapters, for a few months. Then I made a Tumblr. I saw art for Running on Air by @tinyhistory. I am a simple raccoon, I see pretty things, I click. I ended up reading the entire fic in one sitting. 

Which Drarry fic hooked you?  The Fallout by everythursday (Dramione) is the fic that dragged me back to fandom kicking and screaming. Running on Air is what brought me over to Drarry (and by god, is it beautiful!!), but the fic that truly hooked me was Tea and No Sympathy by who_la_hoop.  I think that same week after I finished it, after the requisite amount of time spent staring at a wall and feeling as if my entire life had changed, I sat down and read through all of bix/firethesound/loveglows/lqt fics. There was not a lot of sleep happening. Lol.

Top three favorite Drarry fics: this was so difficult 😂 my 400 bookmarks are yelling at me! 

1. Coming Home by @nerdherderette

M, 9.8k - TWs: MCD, Grief/Mourning, Mild Sexual Content

Three years after his world was shattered, Harry tries to pick up the pieces at the place he once called home. 

I literally can’t even count the amount of times I’ve read this fic - I know that in 2021 I read it 18 times. 💀💀 And I’ve begged countless people to read it. It’s so gorgeous; the prose is exactly what you expect, entirely captivating and encompassing, and Harry’s grief feels so real. Though we don’t get a happy ending here, there’s something about this fic that holds my entire heart. This story taught me a lot as a writer about how a story doesn’t need to be fairy tales  and rainbows at the end to have a striking and meaningful conclusion that feels right. 

2. genesis (you don’t know what it means to win) by crossourbridges

T, 73.5k - No TWs

Harry Potter didn’t help the Malfoy’s because he owed them; he did it because it was the right thing to do. He’s not sure why he keeps going back to visit, except that it seems to annoy Draco Malfoy and he loves annoying Draco Malfoy.

Ya’ll. This Harry. He is the ultimate characterization for me. Honestly, this type of fic is largely not my style - it’s kind of light-hearted and humorous, and there is no smut (😭). BUT. and this is a huge but. The writing is so dynamic, and the drarry banter is SPOT ON, and there’s even some lovely interaction with Narcissa, who I absolutely adore in this story. It’s SO GOOD. I find myself coming back to this fic as a comfort read (because who doesn’t read 74k words for comfort). I absolutely fall in love with the boys all over again every time. I tend to keep this fic open in my tabs, that’s how often I read it!

3. the space between (what you want and what you need) by  disapparater  

M, 13.6k - TWs: major character injury, disability, sexual dysfunction

As a specialist Healer in dark magic, Draco has had his fair share of difficult cases and awkward patients. Still, nothing has prepared him for a curse-paralysed Harry Potter.

Okay. I’m not going to lie. This isn’t an easy read. (In fact, you’ll find that most of the fics I enjoy aren’t). But this is a heartfelt look at acquired physical disabilities, and also features an ace! Draco. Be still, my beating heart! Literary weaknesses abound! As someone who grew up with a disabled parent, who saw the journey in real time and up close, this fic speaks to me on a different level. I love the depth of Harry’s character, and I love the fact that this author chose to write from Draco’s POV as a healer. Being that we’re in Draco’s POV, it’s also incredible to read this fic and get to experience what is, in my opinion, a more accurate portrayal of asexuality/ace spectrum characterisation. As someone who is demi, I’m constantly on the lookout for ace rep in fiction, and this is one of my absolute favorites for that reason. (You can see some of my other ace/demi faves here in my bookmark collection).

HONORABLE MENTIONS

💕 Crown Witness by @slytherco - E, 70k. TWs - violence

After the war, wizarding society is oppressed by a new kind of plague—an organised crime group calling itself the Family.

When Harry Potter goes to interrogate a potential witness, he doesn’t expect to end up on the run again, trying to keep Draco Malfoy alive, while a manhunt follows in their footsteps, adamant on eliminating the one witness that could ruin everything.

In which Harry and Draco learn that the way to each other might just have to go through the dingiest hotels in Britain.

💕 The Body Keeps Score by @amorsindolor - E, 13.5k. TWs - mentions of past trauma (not between drarry)

Draco cries during sex.

A story about touch, intimacy, and the healing we find through mutual trust and love.

💕 holemate by @vukovich - E, 18.9k. TWs - description of wasting disease

Most people never get a soulmate. Harry has buried three. When the mark appears again, this time alongside an American Auror, perhaps a diversion can keep everyone alive. A diversion that looks a whole lot like a chaotic, fuckable Malfoy.

💕 Have Your Cake and Eat It, Too by @peachpety - E, 3.9k. No TWs. 

Harry Potter loves his birthday… until he doesn’t.

All it takes is a miserable slice of jealousy, sprinkled with an unfortunate slip of the tongue, and doused with a heavy dollop of pining to turn Harry sour. Fortunately for him, Draco Malfoy is there to sweeten the day.

See the full post

28 notes - Posted March 10, 2022

#2

six-ish sentences

whew. it’s been awhile since i’ve had anything to share (life is cray for me rn, iykyk) but some lovelies tagged me and whelp. i have this unedited lil nugget that isn’t for anything in particular (except my love of pansy and stuffing too many adjectives in my scenes). ty @vukovich @drarrymybeloved @the-sinking-ship  @mintamintathings for the tags <3

They’re in Panama, this time; the rattling of street carts and faint chatter mix with the sound of twilight waking, its insects chirping as the moon slowly rises against a bruised blue-red sky. A curl of smoke drifts, hazy and swirling in the balmy air, thick and lethargic. It’s heavy, hanging stilted and slow-rising, making the grey smoke lazy in its escape. 

Ginny sighs, watching for a beat, before her feet are moving her across the room. Inch by inch, slender legs reveal themselves, and her eyes can’t help but follow that bare skin up, up, up, their path only impeded by the thin, white cotton robe wrapping itself around Parkinson’s body. She’s languid, in the way she only gets when she’s away, when she knows Ginny has come at her beck and call once again, lounging loose-limbed, a fag hanging delicately between her fingers over the edge of the chair. 

“Thought you’d quit.”

Parkinson’s face turns, eyes flashing open as she lifts the cigarette to her lips, taking a slow drag and exhaling it out the side of her mouth. 

“Thought you said you wouldn’t come.”

tagging my darlings @peachpety @corvuscrowned @calypsotempete @amorsindolor @wynnyfryd @nv-md @drarryruinedme @avenueofesc @mystickitten42 @thusspoketrish @softlystarstruck 

32 notes - Posted January 26, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

throwing rope

@nv-md, my darling. i present to you some shameless Ginny thirst art, and as a bonus, a wee pining Pansy POV. happy valentine’s day, and happy early bday, Ali! <3 i cherish you. all my love to @amorsindolor​ for the beta, hype, and endless wisdom. 💕 you can also read it on AO3! (you can see a better quality image too!) 

Pansy’s heels are rubbing, even encased in familiar worn leather as they are, her shirt sticky and starched from the sweat of the day. A little piece of her aches, small and sharp, watching as a faint smile crosses Ginevra’s lips, even in the thick of it all. The heat bears down on their backs as the sun burns across the skyline.

Wisps of hair escape Ginevra's braid —tickling her nose and sticking to the perspiration dotting her skin —a loop of rope held in her loose fist. It’s dusty today, much like it is everyday, a thin film of ochre infiltrating anything not locked down or closed up tight. The constant stomping of boots and hooves kicking up the earth is a regrettable exasperation, spinning tiny whirlwinds of grit to tuck into every crevice.

Pansy thinks that maybe she wasn’t quite built for this world, feeling shaky in her own skin, smothering it all up in sharp barbs and snarky quips, edging out anyone who might get close enough to find her out. But Ginevra, well. It’s like she’d been carved out of the mighty red rocks themselves, standing in strong relief against the backdrop. Taking her own place in the landscape, belonging to the earth and the sky and the stars. 

Ginevra laughs, looking at Pansy a split-second before she throws her rope through the air. 

It’s that feeling, those hidden looks and sly smiles, that tells her this much for certain: that she may be able to count her name among the rest of those great, big things that tether Ginevra to this world. 

And that Pansy wants to feel her own lasso pull taut. 

60 notes - Posted February 14, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[kb1301]

welcome

this account is all intended for the purpose of everything that my first and main account's focus isn't for. this account includes:

video games

anime

tv shows

series

dungeons and dragons

fanfiction making / writing

shipping

character headcanons

heroforge character creation

oc making

discussions

space and astronomy stuff

and more

current interests:

dropout stuff

dimension 20

critrole’s exandria unlimited: calamity

dungeons and dragons

jujutsu kaisen (little contentious for me rn)

baldur’s gate 3

dragon age

mass effect

stardew valley

smosh

fortnite

elder scrolls (skyrim and online)

fallout (new vegas, 4 and tv)

call of duty (really in it for the men but i can understand the story)

destiny 2 (strangely, i havent played it since 2021… and yet im into it)

and some more to add

i lurk a lot, reblog a lot, and like a lot. may make posts here and there. if u follow me, expect multiple fandoms!

one day i'll make a directory / masterlist here so if u ever get here, you'll know where to go

picrew used for icon is from here

[mythicaldemigoddess-of-deltarune]

This Aroaceflux Earth Angel Enbirl Hates Ron DeSantis...

[Note: Reading This Is Optional. Also Don’t Reblog Without Permission]  

I do have another thing I’m still writing, has some stuff in it and half of it being about how I feel about his stupidity and yeah I’m going to pray he NEVER becomes President...

well I can only try to hope and pray that he never wins and he isn’t allowed to office, because he will NEVER be my president....

and yeah, I hate his stupid bill as well....

I guess I could of went with a better title for this, but a Earth Angel hating Ron DeSantis isn’t wrong....even if it does turn out some other Earth Angels might tell me not to hate him, but I do hate him....

I mean I’m Aroaceflux (and Fictoromantic) and a Nonbinary-Girl.

and well, I know it might be a while maybe longer, before I flux...

I mean like the Aceflux part.....

and yeah, as weird as it might be, I do have a small crush on Doctor Deep from Sonic Prime, which it isn’t a really big type of crush and it is like a small one.

I don’t really feel all that attracted in a romantic way to real life humans, and with how Ron DeSantis is, it only adds to the reasons for me to not be attracted to some humans...

even if I do end up having some crushes on real life humans, I will not even bother pursing a romantic relationship, I had bad luck with online boyfriends before, and I have no interest in trying to get another one....

I would rather play video games with some dating sim in it, or like Fallout 4 or Mass Effect, where you can choose to have your playable character end up in a romantic relationship or not.

that and maybe watch some shows or movies or read some books with some romance in it, but also has the other stuff in it, like friendships and some other elements that make it a great series.

also let’s say I did decide to get a boyfriend, he would need to understand at times I do NOT want to be touched and I need my personal space.

but I am not going to get into a real life romantic relationship, and I really don’t feel like doing that right now....

plus my whole panic attack that happen in a car that happen around 2015, is separate from my being Aroaceflux....

and yeah this year, I kind of ended up feeling not so great like before, but in a lesser way, so this time it wasn’t as bad...

I just don’t like being alone in the car, because certain reasons...

I know the last panic attack I had that happen in 2015, was a lot more than how I was feeling a few days ago when I was alone in the car again...

I still didn’t like it, but I had a better control I guess, but there was this type of feeling near my heart, and well when I did tell family about it, they did say it might be anxiety, but I’m not sure if that is right or not....

I know I did end up hyperventilating when I was alone in the car in 2015...

I ended up hitting my head while inside the car.

and I know about Joe Biden’s habit of sniffing hair.....

would it be possible to get a Easter Bunny to be my bodyguard...?

yeah I heard about that one thing that happen that involves the Easter Bunny.

also there is a reason why I don’t like being alone outside far away from home and in a car alone, and I should be glad it didn’t end up like how it was in 2015 when I had that one panic attack, I don’t think I even knew at the time I was having a panic attack.

I feel safer at home, and safer with family when I go out somewhere...

but if I don’t feel like going inside a place, and I rather stay in the car, but that can have a down side because of the whole being alone in the car with no one else and well, there is that....

and I still rather not have Ron DeSantis become President...

I hate his guts, and yeah it is one of the tags for this....

hopefully things will work out, and he never becomes president.

it be nice if I can make some form of royal decree that he is forbidden to run for president.....but can’t really do that, and the next best thing I can try to do, is pray to both God and Goddess that he doesn’t become President.

hopefully it isn’t just me that will be praying that he doesn’t become President, and that he doesn’t get his way.

the other thing I’m writing, that also mentions my dislike for DeSantis....

well, it also talks about some family stuff, which I wont say what it is about on here, but all I can say it has to do with Ancestors.

I think I will wait a bit more before I post that....

but does Ron DeSantis even understand what he is doing is wrong, that by doing that stupid “right to discriminate” bill, he is only harming humanity.

well, here is hoping he doesn’t get his way and that stupid bill that says “right to discriminate” gets rip into pieces...

I don’t know if I have anything else to say, but I just don’t like that guy...                                             

[sawyingthroughthewasteland]

I posted 1,476 times in 2022

That's 1,476 more posts than 2021!

203 posts created (14%)

1,273 posts reblogged (86%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@wastelandhell

@sawyingthroughthewasteland

@amazinglyegg

@legion-posting

@kyngsnake

I tagged 520 of my posts in 2022

#danse - 88 posts

#fo4 - 68 posts

#sttw - 60 posts

#writing rambles - 28 posts

#my ao3 works - 15 posts

#mac - 15 posts

#fallout fin - 14 posts

#fo4 danse - 13 posts

#deacon - 10 posts

#maccready - 9 posts

Longest Tag: 130 characters

#also the soundtm i'm pretty sure is a weird glitch or bug but it conveniently happened with danse and when sawyer first met deacon

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Nick: after all these years, its remarkable how untouched they are by radiation. Can't improve what's already perfection, I suppose.

SS: daww~ Nick you flatter me!

Nick: I'm talking about the wolves, dipshit.

33 notes - Posted April 15, 2022

#4

Companion Reacts! Finding a Pool :)

I miss being able to swim in public pools so I'm going to write a prompt with it in pure longing- enjoy. Prompt: It was beautiful, utterly stunning. Sole hadn't seen anything more perfect since they left the vault, and maybe even before then. A large, pristine, clean pool. The water was a perfect cyan, shimmering in the summer sun and rippling peacefully as a gentle wind swept over its surface. They approached cautiously, after all, if they've learned anything this would be the perfect trap. Nothing. Creeping close, they dropped their pipboy sensor into the water. No rads. Just utter perfection in this hell. It didn't take long for word to spread among their friends and soon, the companions were all enjoying the rare find.

Curie:

She is fascinated with the pool. How is the water so blue? What chemicals make it so clean? Does it sanitize the swimmers? She takes several vials to study back in her lab before quickly running away from being splashed. As much as she's intrigued by the find- it takes Sole's convincing and a cute matching swimsuit Hancock threatening to scoop her into his arms and running into the water with her to get her in the water. She's gleefully nervous, but after taking forever to "adjust to ze temperature", she'll happily float on the side and watch the others.

And no, she doesn't really know how to swim? She'll still learning to run with the four limbs she has, but after all but her small frame floats a lot better than her old one. She prefers to avoid being splashed but if threatened, will splash back with multiple gleeful complaints in french. Dogmeat:

Oh my god. Yes. YES. YES. Before the water was even tested he had jumped right on in to Sole's dismay. The boy's tail will not stop wagging when the other's eventually join in. We should do this all the time! He's been trying to tell them all this time when leaping into wastewater tanks!' This also is when people realize how clingy the german shepard can be. When he gets tired, he still refuses to get out of the water despite the convenient stairway nearby. No, he's using his claws to climb onto the nearest person and perch. No use in missing out on the fun! After poor Maccready gets scratched up with the dog's unclipped nails, everyone scatters from the poor pooch. Its not like they're wearig armor in the pool or anything. Danse immediately takes one for the team and holds the dog gently in his arms like baby Dogmeat is. The paladin recieves many puppy kisses in thanks to his dismay but holds the dog as long as he wants to be held. Preston:

Prezel knows how to swim, its just... not his thing? Even with the General's encouragement, he holds up his hand and shakes his head polietly in decline. He'll wear a swimsuit, one of the those older one-pieces that look like a swim shirt and shorts morphed into one- but he'd prefer to just let his legs dangle in the water. If anyone needs something from outside the pool, he's the one to fetch it- and later in the day he leaves to fetch snacks for everyone. Anything to help the General on his day off. When a splash fight breaks out, he always rushes to Curie's side to try to protect her- but won't splash back. Why fight when he can just step away? Deacon:

He, Maccready, and Hancock are all the ones you need to watch out for when the General's back is turned. His specialty? Popping up in the most random locations from the deep below. Sometimes with hair, sometimes without- but always those shades and a quirky smirk. He's the only one immune to Maccready's splashing, but will gladly fight back. Also, due to changing swimsuits three different times- he has the worse tan lines out of everyone. Flipping between a speedo, bikini, and cargo swim trunks will do that to a pasty man like himself. Maccready:

He's probably the most enthusiastic one about the pool and a public threat to everyone- despite not knowing how to swim. His height lets him cheat like that compared to the other non-swimmers. His signature move? Canon ball. Who knew such a small twink could make such a splash but he's got it down to a science. He'll splash anyone and everyone if he can- but its all fun and games until Danse picks his twink ass up and drops him into the deep end. He calms down considerably after the General and Deacon have to dive after him. His look? Brown cargo pants. Not swim trunks, pants. Its as cursed as you think it is. He doesn't give two shits, he's having too much fun! He's got a day to burn in this place baby and he's making it everyone's problem! He... also needs to learn all the tricks so he can teach Duncan. With this pool location noted, he's for sure going to be protecting it so his son can enjoy it. Who knew something could bring so much joy to someone without costing a single cap? Nick:

A pool sounded like a recipe to staining his synthetic skin with the scent of chorine- and he wanted far from it. Instead, he prefers to watch from a safe distance from the splash zone. He joins in with Preston in fetching things for the others and is the only one who managed to remember to bring towels. He doesn't change or anything, just vibing on a nearby chair with a stack of case files next to him along with his favorite fountain pen. At some point he'll ask Deacon for a pair of shades (which he takes off the one he has on to reveal another, smaller pair of shades on underneath). Also, on this day, he and Piper become best friends in Operation Make Sure Dogmeat Doesn't Shake Near Their Work. Later in the day, when Curie discovers with glee that she can see underwater with something called "goovles!", he's the one that runs to a nearby store to look for wraparound goggles. Danse (post-BB ofc):

Shockingly, it took him the longest to convince to hop in- it was a whole five-step process. First convincing him it was safe and no one was going to raid them when they were "unnecessarily exposed to an ambush without their gear with them". Then he needed to be convinced to join in the fun rather than guard his friends, which took a 'direct order' from the General to get through his head. Finally, there was the swimsuit fiasco. This one took the longest. It's only then that everyone realized how self-aware the large man was about his appearance. Still decked out in BoS tattoos and far more hairy and muscular than anyone else there- he was incredibly shy about leaving the locker room without a shirt on. Probably if Sole hadn't kept an eye on him, he would've happily avoided his ordered dosage of 'fun' by hiding in a bathroom stall. Sole practically had to drag him out into the open and shove the paladin into the pool to get him to losen up. He knows how to swim- albiet very 'professionally'. We're talking flawless treading, freestyle, even butterfly if given enough room but he preferred to hang out near the sides with the likes of Preston and Curie. That was, until Maccready started to get too rambunchous. After that, everyone pieced together that the man was strong enough to launch them a good five feet in the air and he immediately began getting requests. After that, Danse started to enjoy himself ('Exhilerating! :D '). Later when everyone calmed down, it came down to him to hold Dogmeat and protect everyone from the fate of being coated with red lines from the pup's claws. He took the duty with honor, holding the pup in his arms and keeping him close. At the end of the day, he's the last to leave the pool. He... wishes he had joined in earlier. What do you mean everyone is already tired? Hancock:

At first the Mayor kept with with Maccready and Deacon when it came to showing off tricks and performing pranks and the like- but it wasn't too long until he started to get bored. After all, with the no-nose state he's in, going underwater and keeping water out of his breathing hole was a bit... difficult. Luckily Fahrenheit was nearby who was able to go fetch him a floatie and a cooler full of his favorite 'treats'. For the most part he spent the day floating by, listening in on the different conversations happening around the pool, harassing Nick and trying to get him to jump in, or later getting Danse to toss him. A few pleasant evening indeed. He knows how to swim for certain. He's not the best, but it works. When it comes to his swimwear, he debated rocking out in a speedo. After all, it was what he wore to the last swim party. Glancing in a mirror on the way out, he paused- before instead running to fetch a onesuit. He... hates to admit it, but his skin isn't exactly the best suited for swimming and being rubbed raw when wet. Well, that is in chlorine waters. Deacon was quick on hyping the man up, and he ended up having a floppy sunhat and big round sunglasses tossed into the mix. Piper:

She shows up on the scene with the necessities. A bright red one suit to let her tan her legs, fierce looking sunglasses so others know she means business, a towel tucked under her arm, swim bag on her back, and her little sister holding her hand. The group may be partying, but she was not going to let any juicy information on the General slip away. Not on her watch. She quickly finds a spot next to Nick, wrestles a nearby umbrella to cover the two ("Thanks, doll.") before getting to work on editing her latest work. When she gets hot from tanning, she takes a dip near Curie- forgetting her pen behind her ear of course. To the two ladies relief, Mac and Hancock don't try any funny business when Piper's nearby. Nat, meanwhile, enjoys her afternoon playing with the boys during their splash wars and getting tossed by the local ex-paladin. Only a little high though. Danse won't say it, but the reporter scares him. In the end, she ends up finishing her latest report with minimal water marks on it (literal ones that is) and manages to outline a new piece. 'Insider's Look on the Minutemen's Day Off'. Hm. Still working on the title.

Sawyer (my Sole OC lol): Thanks to both growing up near a swimming hole and spending far too much time in Far Harbor, the man is a decent swimmer at this point. Granted, it takes a while to get the poor man adjusted to Being in Water for ~PTSD~ reasons but after he gets adjusted he's pretty happy in it. For the most of the day, he watches over his people- will go chat with Curie and Preston and even gets Danse to toss him sometimes. Even though he's incredibly close with everyone there, he found himself spending most of the time with Dogmeat. No one wanted to really play with the wet and shedding mutt but thanks to growing up on a farm, Sawyer didn't mind. This afternoon should be a treat to everyone, especially his special boy. He rocks some good ol fashion cargo swim trunks and keeps an eye on the hyper child Maccready is and stays behind after to clean up. And... well... wade in the water in Danse's arms. The usual.

37 notes - Posted April 5, 2022

#3

me and danse working on a new freezing automatic rifle: -test fires it at the ground- :) Nick, from the building over, trying to read his newspaper: Quit it. >:V

39 notes - Posted March 24, 2022

#2

greatly appreciating that other people also love Danse w chub. A Danse with kneadable chub is a healthy Danse. Pat it like bongo, smooch him on the forehead. Shit my boy be healin’

52 notes - Posted December 12, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

me, first meeting danse: omg paladin danse :) me, when he does his helmet trick: omg :) me: :) me: okay now take it off >:(

105 notes - Posted March 24, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[victorluvsalice]

AU Thursday: “Londerland Bloodlines” Is Still A Thing

Been a few months since I actually talked about this one, huh? At least in terms of how the writing’s going. . . As a reminder, I finished up the rough draft in January -- now, here in July, I’m currently editing the start of Chapter 3. Which, for the curious, starts with the Bloody Mess quest (retrieving the werewolf blood) and transitions into Trick or Treatment (saving a certain lady -- or, in Alice’s case, young man -- from certain death with one’s blood. . .). I’m currently on page 78 of 192 (yes, the damn thing has grown further as I edit).

Now -- that does mean that I do have two chapters “in the can,” as it were. Or, at the very least, with a second editing pass done. My friend Gigs on Dreamwidth has been making noises about actually reading some of this story, but I find myself balking a little bit simply because of the size of the chapters. Chapter 1 covers Alice’s Embrace and very first night as a vampire -- aka the opening cutscene and tutorial -- and it weighs in at just over 38 pages in LibreOffice Writer. That’s -- that’s a lot, right? I’m not imagining that that is A Lot? And I know there’s plenty out there about readers not complaining about chapters being too long, but. . .yeah. Mental hurdles. (Not to mention there’s the whole “doing the final typo pass on this thing is going to take AGES” part to worry about. . .)

So yeah, I guess my question to you is -- given that I would probably likely post them mostly “as-is,” and they WOULD be long chapters -- WOULD you guys like me to upload “Londerland Bloodlines: Santa Monica’s Deluded Depths” (the first part of the journey, because holy hell this is gonna take a while) sooner rather than later? Or should I see if can break this stuff down into smaller chunks first? Let me know!

[moth-song-archives]

The Insatiable Flow of Time (1/8)

I remembered that I can make posts here too huh! Anyways, I wrote a post-MAG200 fic <3

I’ll reblog it again with the link to ao3 if you’d prefer reading it there :D

Rating: Teens and Up Archive Warnings: Choose Not To Use Categories: F/F Relationships: Georgie/Melanie, Georgie & Jon, Jonmartin (mentioned) Characters: Georgie Barker, Melanie King, Jonathan Sims, the Admiral, Basira Hussain (mentioned), Rosie Zampano (mentioned), Martin Blackwood (mentioned)

Additional tags: Diary/Journal × post mag200 × Post-Canon × Canon Compliant × Rated for swearing and me doing my best to write a fitting epilogue for my most fave story of all time × Bittersweet × Hurt/Comfort × Grief/Mourning × Gentle-Sad-Soft × Fluff × Non-Sexual Intimacy × Tenderness × Generally Hopeful Ending × Ambiguous/Open Ending × Catharsis × You know how TMA is a tragedy? ... yeah × Hope Punk × dealing with the fallout of surviving a literal apocalypse × Moving on and letting go × Trans Georgie Barker × Nonbinary Melanie King × Melanie uses any pronouns but needs to (re)discover this first × and is then mainly referred to with they/them pronouns for diary-simplicity × Melanie is ace in my heart ♡ × Jon is also enby but it only gets referred to in passing × Georgie has a Type™ × Character Study × i love them all so much × Nonbinary aspec author × it's very hope punk and somft BUT ALSO VERY SAD × in like a cathartic way × because i like causing pain :') × pre-written and updates every 2-3 days

I think I might use it to… rediscover myself. That’s what I liked about journaling in the first place, I think. Getting to think about things outside of my own head, putting it out there so I could move on? Maybe it’s time to return to old coping mechanisms and try again. Even if I haven’t really changed. Even if I should’ve changed. Right?

As the world tries to piece itself back together, Georgie grapples with her past, her present, and her future by keeping a diary. She also keeps having this strange, recurring dream that involves Jon. Post MAG200.

Finished at ~12k, will upload over the next couple of days <3

Day 3 - Evening

Melanie is sleeping. Basira is also sleeping, on the sofa in the living-room. She doesn’t really know what to do with herself, these days, so for now she’s staying with us.

I am not sleeping. I’m so far beyond tired that I can’t sleep anymore. It’s been... how long? More than a day, certainly. I’m at the kitchen table and the night outside is darker than any I’ve ever seen. There are no street lights and a million more stars than I could’ve ever imagined. I wish Melanie could see them too :(

Back before everything in my life went wrong, I used to be really good at this. I think I got my first diary when I was... seven, maybe eight? I used to be obsessed with it. I guess I stopped writing in college, after the incident, because it felt... wrong? Like I was lying to myself, trying to fabricate emotions that just weren’t there, keeping up with things that no longer seemed important or note-worthy. Mainly, I couldn’t make myself care about anyone or anything anymore.

I think I want to find that person again, now that it’s over. Try and… move on? And Melanie encouraged me :) I guess that’s the main reason. I found this notebook in one of the domains when we were rescuing people. I don’t know what I originally wanted to do with it, but I did end up forgetting about it until I went through my bag again today. It smells like fire and is a bit singed in places, but I kind of like that? I think I might use it to… rediscover myself. ...that sounds very pretentious, but this is just for me, so...

And I like that it’s just cheap paper scribbled on with a shitty biro. Maybe I’ll just burn it when all the thoughts are on the paper instead of in my head. When I can sleep again. And the prize for the most dramatic way of closure goes to Georgie Barker! But yeah. That’s what I liked about journaling in the first place, I think. Getting to think about things outside of my own head, putting it out there so I could move on? Maybe it’s time to return to old coping mechanisms and try again. Even if I haven’t really changed. Even if I should’ve changed. Right?

But I don’t feel any different. Shouldn’t I feel different, now that they’re gone? The entities, I mean, though Jon and Martin seem to be gone, too.

I keep remembering Martin’s expression when he told us to go early, how upset he was.

Honestly, I can’t say I’m surprised. As long as I’ve known Jon, he’s always done what he thought best. It used to drive me up the walls, but I also admired it, I think? I never would’ve told him that, but… Well. He’s gone now.

It’s over, all of it.

And I still can’t sleep.

And Melanie is still blind, and I still feel empty, and my fear still hasn’t come back. Everyone who died is still dead, and the trauma is still there. There were angry mobs in the streets, and people got killed.

I can’t quite believe that Jon and Martin went with them. I can’t believe they left us behind to explain the entire mess.

 We’re back in our old flat. It’s so weird to be back home. Everything looks the same, as though no time passed at all. Nobody knows what date it is. How long were we caught in there?

Outside, it feels like spring. There are birds everywhere, singing their hearts out. Sounds like more birds than there used to be, too. The trees are leafless and dead-looking, but Basira pointed out that they’re getting there... and it feels like spring.

I haven’t slept properly in 3 days because the questions keep me awake. It’s not that I’m worrying, really, just… thinking? I think I could sleep better if the worry had come back, but it hasn’t.

As far as we can tell, all modern devices are broken, too. Computers and phones and such, digital cameras, generators... we don’t even know what the rest of the world looks like. I hadn’t realised how much gets controlled by computers these days, we don’t even have central heating or water access in our flat. Rumours and news are spreading person-to-person, like in the Olden Days. We only have emergency systems that were installed in case of nation-wide blackout. I guess I’m glad we don’t actually have a blackout, we just need to get the computers back to work. (If I understood it correctly.)

Melanie thinks it’ll all come back to life in a few more days. I certainly hope so. I also hope I’ll stop feeling like this. Or rather, not feeling like anything. It’s so strange. Like in the first days after the incident, when I just felt numb?

They’re gone! I want to feel like a person again! What if I never get myself back?

 They’re actually gone.

 What will we do with our lives now? Basira isn’t the only one who feels uprooted. I think the whole world feels like that right now.

I hope my computer comes back soon. I miss music, and making things. My photos, all those memories.

I don’t want to lose all of that. I want to start fresh, but not without records of the past.

…I’ve had a lot of time to think about that, specifically. Records, and futures.

What the Ghost is done, right? There’s no fun in creepy ghost stories if you’ve been through an actual, living nightmare.

I think I want to start new with that, too. When everything works again, that is.

New world, new future, new podcast. I like that. I think. Make a record of what happened through eyewitness accounts? Or is that too similar to the Statements… then again, it’ll be more like interviews. And I think we shouldn’t forget.

We owe them that much.

I’ll have to talk it over with Melanie tomorrow. Maybe.

We’ll see.

God, I think maybe… maybe I can actually try and sleep tonight. Writing does seem to help.

 Note to self: thank Laverne for suggesting it. (Also for being there for Melanie. And listening to us. And stopping with that culty nonsense. She’s the only one we found so far, but she actually listened to us. Strange to think that in this world, I have to be grateful for someone not worshipping me for some dumb reason?!)

   Day 4 - Morning

So. Three things.

1) I did manage to fall asleep after all! I’ve always been a bit of an insomniac, especially after the incident, so actually getting some proper rest felt really good.

2) I somehow woke up right as the sun went up! I think I’ve never seen a dawn this beautiful? I watched it from the bedroom window and I’ll definitely describe it to her in detail when she wakes up! The Admiral was sleeping on our pillow, right next to her head, snuggled up against the back of her neck and shoulder... it was so cute. I can’t believe my phone and camera still don’t work! Melanie has that old polaroid camera somewhere but we haven’t found it yet, and I wish my art skills were any better. I did draw a sketch of the two of them though. I’ll cherish it forever, no matter how shitty it is :’)

After everything that happened, the Admiral is still a bit weird around us. He started out really aggressive, calmed down a bit, and now… now he’s weirdly skittish? Meows a lot. Keeps walking around the flat. The only thing that even remotely returns him to how he used to be is tuna. It’s weird.

But seeing him like that, with Melanie? I love him so much.

I think he’ll be okay.

But before I forget, and why I actually got out the diary at this ungodly hour instead of trying to go back to sleep now that the sun is up…

3) I had a really nice dream. And... I don’t even know. I think I want to try and hold onto the feeling? I don’t think I’ve felt that… deeply… in a long while. Maybe the last time was before all this, when we decided to move in together. Before all of this happened.

For a moment, I felt like I was whole again :’)

It didn’t even have Melanie in it, which is very rude tbh. I think Jon was there? The Admiral, too. We were just chilling on the sofa, watching netflix I think... It felt so... mundane??? Casual, somehow??? Like it was normal to feel like that and I just... I want THAT. I want to feel like that again, instead of this weird… blank nothingness? I want that all the time, not just when I’m riding a high or feeling so terrible that it pierces through.

I don’t know if that makes sense but this is just for me anyway so I suppose it doesn’t have to.

 I think I should feel bad about Jon being gone, but I still don’t even feel relief at it being over. Just this vague numbness.

I hate it so much, except I don’t, actually, I just know that I should?

Melanie keeps saying that I need a therapist but if we’re being honest here, I guess I need one the least? The whole goddamn world needs therapy right now. Including the therapists. And I’ve been dealing with this for a long time now.

I guess I keep hoping it’ll just go away somehow.

 Anyways. Enough introspection, I’m going back to bed. I hope I don’t wake them! :)

  Day 4 - Evening

 It’s night now, the sun went down hours ago. We have a bunch of candles, but I’m trying to use them sparingly, so I just have one lit. I put a glass of water next to the candle so now the light gets magnified a bit more. It’s a weird atmosphere, but I kinda like it? Feels… cozy! :)

I’m still not over how everything looks the same, but nothing works like it did before, and there’s this… burden? This collective trauma everyone went through. It feels so surreal. So many things are still broken… it’s like we woke from a collective nightmare, but pieces of it still remain, floating around.

And we just sent it away with the tapes. I really hope those other worlds are doing better than us, but what else could we have done? I… try not to think about it. I know I should, but I still can’t really bring myself to care, or even feel overly guilty for that? …

 Melanie fell asleep with her head in my lap half an hour ago. I was reading to her. She says she loves the sound of my voice, so I’ve started doing that in the evenings. (I still love that we had separate crushes from a distance on each other for ages because of youtube and WTG. We’ve been talking about that a lot, too.)

She still has nightmares, but apparently she’s also been having good dreams, and she looks so peaceful right now. The last few days have been a lot, but in comparison to before, and even before then…

It’s over. We made it out. We get to have a future together. I still can’t quite believe it. :)

 I guess I’m writing again (despite already having done so in the morning) because it somehow helped yesterday and I’m hoping to replicate that. And I have a lot to think about. It’s been a long day.

Basira is still out there, helping out where she can. I think she feels guilty. Melanie says she doesn’t because there was no other choice, but I know her, and I know that she’s lying.

There’s always another choice. We just say that to make it easier to bear.

I hope she knows she can come talk to me when she feels ready to tackle it.

I hope I ever feel able to tackle it myself. No. I will talk to her when I’m ready.

We did talk a bit about things, of course. Melanie doesn’t really remember her dreams, most of the time, but apparently she’s been alternating between horrifying nightmares and a really nice, recurring one that sometimes happens after the nightmares. She doesn’t really remember much of it, but she mentioned it after I told her about the Jon dream. Not what it was about, just… in general.

From the way she talked about it, I think her dad might have been in it? I’m actually not sure, but the way she smiled…

She has that little smile on her lips again, even now, dreaming. The soft one she gets when she talks about good things. About him.

About me.

(I still can’t believe she chose me. How impossibly lucky? How did I ever deserve her? But then, it’s not about that, is it? She is mine, and I am hers, and… life will be good. I know it will be.)

 She’s been smiling a lot more, these past few days.

[solesurvivorpaigeargot]

I absolutely LOVE Sketchy Saturdays and I always look forward to them!! As for my question(s)? What made you decide to start doing it(I'm glad you do but I was just curious!)?

Hoooo boi the Sketchy Saturday Origin Story: I suppose there's two versions.

The short version reads " Moving stress, deployment depression, and isolation VS. my utter determination to DO SOMETHING whilst trapped in my home " -- Sketchy Saturday was the result of that title fight, so I guess the fandom won in the end? XD

The long version, however... Well, buckle up, cause this is gonna be a ride.

It may surprise y'all to know that two years I was eyeballs-deep in the South Park fandom. The blog still exists; my mainblog, JustCallMeButtlord, built to interact with the audience of my fanfictions-- the New Kid Stories, called NKS for short [gonna be porting those to Ao3 soon, just gotta figure out what robo-reader I'm gonna use to make a quick n dirty podfic out of the series as well as help me hunt down typos my eyes galze over]. The first 'season' of stories had ended, 8 completed fics, and I was puttering about with a bonus holiday story that was several months out of season. Not that I CARED because I was on GUAM where seasons don't exist and my time blindness gets even worse becasue without seasons changing it feels like time never progrsses even after being on the island for three cocksucking years.

I don't hate Guam, I am just not built for constant heat. I am a snow creature; I like below-freezing temperatures so I can layer up in fuzzy, fluffy things and drink hot drinks and cuddle loved ones and/or furry animals. It's a lovely island, I adored my first week there... I just wasn't made to live there.

HIlariously, NKS started out of the stress of moving to Guam. Two years and 8 fics later, the place we were renting was no longer within our price range and my hubby and I were forced to move onto base. Under the leader whom I refuse to name, military pay was given a precentage raise... but it was ripped out of bonuses and OCONUS pay. OCONUS is what a military member is paid when they're stationed Outisde the CONtinental United States. This usually means overseas bases like Japan, but it also means Hawaii, aaaaaand... GUAM. So that percentage pay increase for the military at large meant belt-tightening for every service member abroad, and we were forced to move onto base.

In case y'all haven't noticed by now, I'm a raging socialist with some issued with authority. I DO NOT LIKE EXISTING ON BASE. I do not like existing in a place where the national anthem plays twice a day, every day, at 6 AM and then again whenever the hell sundown is that day. And there's an unspoken rule no one tells you that when it plays you're supposed to stop what you're doing, face the nearest set of speakers playing the song, and stare in that direction with your hand over your heart until its over. That, if you're driving, you have to put on your emergency flashers and pull over. No one tells you this. NO ONE TELLS YOU THIS.

And then, before we had secured a place on base but we had set a move out date for the rental house, the Pandemic happened. While we were between homes. The base is talking full lockdown, Guam authorities want to shut down the island but businesses are terrified of not getting the tourist season business, we don't even know if we'll be allowed to move on to base.

Surprise, I stopped writing for a while... but I picked Fallout 4 back up again. I had been forced into the series years earlier by a toxic relationship, but the game itself hadn't been bad-- just the way I'd been forced to play it by someone who was firmly not in my life anymore. When confronted with character creation, I wasn't sure whom I wanted to make... but decided to go back to an old character. A VERY old character, whom I hadn't thought of since I'd finished ME3 at least 4 years prior, and a character I first conceived of when I was 14-ish... which is now about 15 years ago.

Paige.

I've talked before about how well Paige's story maps onto Fo4, but this was before I knew that. I knew the opening, her losing her kid, and that fit with her-- but something clicked while I was playing and the part of my brain that likes to create started wandering off. Soon enough I've got a couple chapters of a ficlet that I'm TOTALLY just writing as a personal one-shot to de-stress, no way I'm publishing this, I don't wanna get distracted from NKS, I got a whole 'nother season to write! Who cares if no one is reading it anymore because South Park Fandom doesn't like continuous plots.... right?

I was burnt out as hell, the move was looming, the Pandemic was getting worse and everything was getting scarier.

Then the news came through that hubby would be deploying again.

He wasn't supposed to, but the Navy decided the safest place for their sailors was the middle of the ocean, so if you WERENT in quarantine you were going on the boat and you were living there. Didn't matter if your spouse would be alone, unpacking a whole home by themselves.

I had a friend on base. We hung out. I met with my DND group on weekends; we all lived on base now, so we could meet up in like five minutes... and then restrictions tightened. You could be fined up to 5 grand for gathering in groups greater than 5, even outdoors, and detained if suspected of going to a home that wasn't yours. I still met 2 of my friends once a week for walks; get outside, be active, talk to other humans, but besides that? I was locked up alone in a new house in a place that I did NOT like existing in.... with a fresh new hyperfixation developing.

I think it was about a week into the new house that I made the new blog. At first I tried to run it side by side with the South Park stuff, but it wasn't long before all my attention was here... aaaand it also wasn't long before I was confronted with a lot of my own despair; of lockdown, of isolation, of watching a broken system crumble and not being able to DO anything about it, and I started to kinda lose my shit. I fuss-- I can't leave things alone, and I couldn't leave this feeling alone; of being fully and entirely helpless and hopeless.

And then I sketched a thing for a friend, and it made them happy. They were having a rough time, too, and I put something together because I couldn't think of anything else. And it helped. It lifted them up, and it lifted me up, too. Someone else had recently reblogged one of those pallet challenges that floats around Tumblr, and I decided FUCK IT LET'S DO THIS THING AND CALL IT SKETCHY SATURDAY!

Little secret, the very first Sketchy Saturday request? Was me. I was so scared no one would noticed the event, I sent myself the very first request, back when the event still took anons. Soon as that first picture was up:

BANG, suddenly four more; some people off anon. I met people that day, talked to them after the very first Sketchy weekend was over, chatted about the games and characters and art and writing and just... felt human for the first time in a really long while.

I figured I'd hold on to Sketchy Saturday until the deployment was over-- once hubby was back, I'd decide whether I was keeping it or not... but he came back, and I was still super into it, and he was supportive, sooooo I kept going! And then we did Sketchy Secret Santa, and people loved it, and my volunteers are excited about being Sketchy Elves and Secret Helpers and just OH MY GOD I DID A THING GUYS. I DID A THING-- that was just me all December and January long lmafo.

AND JANUARY! Because AH HECK, WE MOVING AGAIN! Because hubby finally got orders, and OH MY GOD we're going back to WA... but it's still a move half-way around the globe, and I was SURE I'd have to shut down the event for a month while we got our shit in order and NOPE, because here come the volunteers from Sketchy Secret Santa, and they wanna fill in all month long! Like... I didn't even ask for that shit, guys. They offered it so the event wouldn't have to take a gap.

Jesus I'm getting teary just remembering it.

So yeah. Sketchy Saturday is here because I got really lonely and stressed out while Fallout 4 provided me with some... catharsis for my situation, and then a pandemic happened.

And then y'all happened, and I'm still here. :D

[hairasuntouchedaspartoftheamazon]

I posted 28,575 times in 2022

160 posts created (1%)

28,415 posts reblogged (99%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@arsonist-macaron

@master7mindd

@thatgaydemigodnerd

@takemetosynagogue

@ulysses-but-somehow-more-transer

I tagged 1,959 of my posts in 2022

#sebastian speaks - 136 posts

#sebastian speaks about space pirates - 43 posts

#the mechanisms - 35 posts

#nastya rasputina - 21 posts

#jim jimenez - 20 posts

#holy shit - 15 posts

#sebastian writes - 14 posts

#ashes o'reilly - 13 posts

#fanfiction - 11 posts

#yooooo - 9 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#like you get this idea of him as a deeply dramatic but also very powerful god-creature who is at turns kind and petty depending on his mood

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

I need you to know that, spiritually, we are all in someone's basement right now huddled around a radio and poking each other with excitement

137 notes - Posted November 29, 2022

#4

I maintain that Sigyn is the saddest Mechs song because Loki is still alive! She’s not dead, she’s sitting right there but she doesn’t know who Sigyn is! She doesn’t know her wife! Sigyn is staring at the woman she loves and lost and that woman doesn’t know her anymore! I start sobbing horrifically!

146 notes - Posted March 17, 2022

#3

me rewatching the end of gravity falls season 2, where the apocalypse is started unwillingly by a protagonist who has left home due to emotional and physical fallout with authority figures close to them who had the knowledge of how to bring about the end of the world, who also has had interactions with entities of pure fear that really like fucking with people in a post-apopcalyptic hellscape where certain people have more control over their surroundings than others due to their connection to the fear god thing that also has a fortress high above the hellscape where they watch over everything with a giant eye:  huh, wonder what this says about my taste in media

158 notes - Posted May 13, 2022

#2

Perhaps one of my favorite things about Jim and Oluwande’s relationship is just how they’re both so earnest and honest.

Like, okay neither of them can lie for SHIT but they also never lie to each other even about silly things like what their plans are, and they just are very open with how they feel about each other even when there’s a lot of other shit going on.

Olu is immediately on board with whatever Jim is doing, and is very open about how he considers them family and wants to be around them. Told literally everybody he was having trouble fucking sleeping because he missed Jim.

Jim, despite being a very secretive person, lets Olu know a lot of important things about them, introduces him (not anybody else) to their Nana, and then, after explaining how important their revenge is to them, chooses him over said revenge. Gave up revenge to come back to the Revenge, for Olu.

Also there’s the fact that like, their entire friendship began when Olu helped Jim murder somebody and then the two of them went on the run together and caught feelings while working on the weirdest fucking ship ever. They are literally ride or die and I ADORE THEM.

242 notes - Posted April 3, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Sorry, just me daydreaming about what the filler episodes of Our Flag Means Death would be like if it was a 22-24 episode season type deal. Obviously all the canon episodes and emotional beats stay because they’re perfect but more episodes means more time for shenanigans and I love me some shenanigans.

Important Things To Include:

-Episode where Black Pete somehow ends up telling stories about Blackbeard to a bunch of kids, ya know, with all the gritty details of how good a pirate Blackbeard is and how smart he is, etc., inter-cut with scenes where Ed and Crew are attempting to teach the crew of the Revenge how to properly pillage/burgle a town and failing miserably

-Jim’s Day Out (because in my fantasy season we get to see more of Jim’s revenge arc before they make the decision to go back to the Revenge) where we get to see them at their most badass while hunting down the Siete (Cinco, ahora) Gallos, but bonus points if we see how much they miss Olu and how their found family contributes to their decision to abandon their revenge

-Episode where Stede and Roach team up to organize and cook a very fancy birthday dinner for Frenchie, which consistently gets foiled by Wee John who is really trying to help but just keeps setting things on fire. Ed has the job of keeping Frenchie distracted and they end up singing some very dirty songs in a pub, and it turns out that Ed spoiled the surprise in like the first five minutes but Frenchie’s cool with it because Wee John made fireworks

-Frenchie becomes friends with a cat. Later, there is a dispute between Karl, Olivia, and said cat that the entire crew takes sides over and this is taken Deadly Seriously, like to the point where no one will talk to each other if they’re on opposite sides. There’s almost a mutiny, and Izzy would enjoy the hostility if he could figure out what it’s about, because no one will tell him. (Bonus points for Stede and Ed trying to communicate that this doesn’t actually impact their growing friendship, that they’re important to each other)

-The crews decide to rob an art gallery/learn about art showings, and the Swede becomes a very good forger while we get to see more of the Revenge crew in fancy outfits (I am looking at you Roach)

-They stage a play on ship (this is a thing real pirates did, okay, it is) and everyone gets very in character; when they get boarded by the Spanish who are still mad at them for Blackbeard kidnapping their hostages, they proceed to competently dispatch the invaders while in character. The second they’re out of character they generally suck at piracy again.

Feel free to add more ideas I’m playing these in my mind on repeat

426 notes - Posted April 4, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[donnie-lover-art]

IRL disaster ‘twins’ who aren’t even related. My friend Slade (left) and I (right) who happened to have been born on the exact same day just shy of 3 hours apart. 

I know this won’t get as much response as my other posts, but I’d like to introduce myself and thank you for all the likes and especially the reblogs on my recent posts. From the bottom of my heart, thank you so so much, it really means a lot to me.

(I do not own the design of the Bo-Katan Kryze Shirt, it just happens to be one of my favourite shirts I own; the artist is NMCRB on Redbubble)

Let me know of yourself in the comments or send in an ask! I’d love to interact more with the wonderful people who follow, like and reblog my stuff.

And now; hello, I’m Finja

Pronouns: She/Her or They/Them Age: 24, born May 27th 1996 Sign: Gemini Nationality: German Height: 1,72 m/5′6 ft Profession: Mechanic/Welder; Previously Web Designer; Equestrian; Full time Cat Mom Hobbies: Writing; Reading; Drawing (again); Riding/Tending to my two horses; Cosplay crafting

Fandoms: Star Wars (OT/PT/ST/Clone Wars/Rebels/Mandalorian), Transformers (OG/Prime/Bayverse/Bumblebee), Lord of the Rings/The Hobbit, Marvel (All stages of Infinity Saga), TMNT (2003/2007/Bayverse/RoTMNT), Dragon Age (Origins/2/Inquisition), Mass Effect Trilogy, Fallout (4/76) and more that I can’t think of now Bold + Cursive are my favorites

Facts about me: Fluent in German, English; Decent in Swedish; Spotty in Spanish and French; Introvert; Dork + Geek; 4 Tattoos (2 visible in art), more to come; Piercings; Have had 3 surgeries on one knee since 2014; have had 2 Endometriosis Removal surgeries since 2017; ADHD since 2002; Battling hormonal Depression and Anxiety since 2017; Feminist; BLM Supporter; Demi + Bi-/Pansexual

[justagirlinafandomworld]

June Reading List

Welcome to June 2020′s masterlist for beccaanne814′s 366 Reblog Challenge! This will be updated (hopefully) every Friday.

See something you like? Click away, read and enjoy! Something rubbing you the wrong way with the summary and warnings alone? Move along, it’s okay. We all have different tastes. I’m not policing you and neither are these wonderful writers.

Enjoy!

2020 Reblog Challenge Masterlist

1. Moral of the Story by @sherrybaby14​ Steve’s girl likes to party all the time and he’s at his wit’s end. Then he meets you. MCU | Steve Rogers x Female Reader Warnings: alcohol, smut, ANGST

All I Want - part 7 by @kellyn1604​ Professor!Steve Rogers sees a lot of potential in a new student. One that he would like to explore, but professional and societal expectations have ways of keeping us form what we want. / You and Steve deal with the fallout of your last encounter. MCU | Steve Rogers x Female Reader Warnings: angst, drinking

2. Still Feel Like Your Man by @captain-kelli​ You weren’t an easy girl to get over, not that Steve wanted to do that anyway. MCU | Steve Rogers x Female Reader Warnings: angst-lite, sexual content, break-up, mentions of alcohol + drinking, the holidays

Paying It Forward by @kellyn1604​ You keep running into Steve at the local coffee shop. He is generous as he is heroic. If only you realized he had ulterior motives. MCU | Steve Rogers x Reader Warnings: awkwardness, insecurities, and fluff

3. Exfiltration by @crispychrissy​ When you’re having a horrible day, you reach out to your boyfriend, who has an unexpected reaction. MCU | Steve Rogers x Female Reader Warnings: minor angst, language, asshole coworkers, fluff, smut, cum...dirty talk, awkwardness, more fluff

Best Life by @impala-dreamer Life is hectic, stressful, full of worry. Sometimes, you need to sneak away and live your best life with your best man by your side. RPF | Chris Evans x Female Reader Warnings: Extremely romantic fluff. SFW. It’s marshmallows dipped in fluff covered in white chocolate topped with strawberry sprinkles.

4. Robotic Heart by @crispychrissy​ A knock at your door in the middle of the night brings more than just two strangers. MCU | Steve Rogers x Female Reader Warnings: Language, fluff, small amounts of angst, hurt!Bucky, more fluff

Prophet - pt 1 by @xetoilerouge​ Your boss calls you in the dead of night. You answer. Why? For an on-going office romance that heats up in every way possible. MCU | CEO! Steve Rogers x Female Reader Warnings: Smut. Drinking mentions. Oral (female receiving). Swearing. Unprotected sex. Some angst at the end. But overall, just smut.

5. The Best Goodbye by @sherrybaby14​ Steve knows just where he wants the Pym particle to take him. MCU | Steve Rogers x Female Reader Warnings: Smut, threesome, stuff that happens in a threesome

Prophet - pt 2 by @xetoilerouge​ Today’s the day. Decisions must be made. Lives have to change. Something you weren’t ready for. There was no way out of this inevitable corner Steve had backed everyone into. Until a stranger makes an offer that couldn’t be refused. MCU | CEO! Steve Rogers x Female Reader Warnings: Angst. Swearing. More angst. Mutual pining. Some fluff bits hidden away.

6. Season’s of Love by @writeyourmindaway​ Prompt: “It’s summer, I can have two boy/girlfriends if I want to.” MCU | Steve Rogers x Reader x Thor Odinson Warnings: none

Golden Stair by @sherrybaby14​ An encounter with two Avengers changes your life. MCU | Steve Rogers x Reader x Tony Stark Warnings: sex pollen, dubious consent, coaxing, smut (no plot), anal, oral, things that happen in a threesome, slight breeding.

7. Stucky Drabble by @cake-writes Prompt: “This coat closet is a little cramped, don’t you think?” MCU | Stucky x Reader Warnings: smut, implied m/m, 18+

8. “It reminded me of you.” by @heli0s-writes​ Request for 28 ways to say I love you. MCU | Reader x Steve x Bucky x Natasha

9. Robots by @sherrybaby14​ Request: hydra!Steve and Winter Soldier!Bucky. MCU | Hyrdra!Steve x Reader x WS!Bucky Warnings: smut, NON CON (PLEASE DO NOT READ IF THIS OFFENDS YOU)

10. Fresh Mountain Air for a Not So Fresh Beginning by @candy-and-writing After a mission went horribly wrong, and resulted in you getting hurt and suffering from major PTSD and anxiety, your boys move you to the mountains to heal. MCU | Steve Rogers x Reader x Bucky Barnes Warnings: 18+, implied rape, past rape, PTSD, anxiety attacks, PTSD attacks, smut, oral, minor angst

11. Good Looking Stranger by @alyxkbrl​ A handsome stranger finally stops by the cafe where you work. MCU | Bucky Barnes x Reader Warnings: Language

Prince of Carrion and Queen of Thieves by @ladyofmaidensandwine​ Captured and forced to become a spy for the enemy, Y/N’s deception is threatened by the arrival of an unexpected face from her hidden past, and must decide whether the son of her enemy could be her ally. SPN | Dean Winchester, fem!Irish Reader, John Winchester, Crowley, Lucifer (mentioned)

12. Flashback by @ohwowreallycool​ Bucky visits a coffee shop after returning from the war. They won, but at what cost? MCU | Bucky Barnes Warnings: maybe some angst

13. Everything by @impala-dreamer Request: You know Sam’s got no soul, but you can’t bring yourself to care. He’s so good at fucking you every possible way. You’ve just got enough energy to sleep, eat and bathe between sessions. SPN | Soulless!Sam Winchester x Reader Warnings: None

14. Those Three Simple Words by @starks-hero​ Three times you told Sherlock Holmes you loved him, and that one time he told you he loved you too. BBC Sherlock | Sherlock Holmes x Reader Warnings: Injured Reader

15. Dream a Little Dream of Me by @writeyourmindaway​ Prompt: “Can I call you?” MCU | Bucky Barnes x Reader

16. Junk in the Trunk by @crispychrissy​ A vampire hunt goes haywire and you and Dean need to hide. SPN | Dean Winchester x Reader Warnings: minor angst, language, smut, dry humping, fluff

Thick by @covered-byroses​ Request/Prompt: Finally getting to see not so little Dean - winky wink ;) SPN | Dean Winchester x Reader Warnings: NSFW, implied handjob

17. Day One by @ladyofmaidensandwine​ Day One of the Hello Spring 31 Day Writing Prompt Challenge: “Can I kiss you?” SPN | Dean Winchester x Reader

18. Day Two by @ladyofmaidensandwine​ Day Two of the Hello Spring 2020 Writing Prompts Challenge: Blind Date SPN | Dean Winchester x Reader

Blood and Blade by @ladyofmaidensandwine​ Confronted by an unexpected face from your past, Dean demands the truth. An unlikely alliance is formed in the face of certain death, and unexpected secrets will be revealed. Part 2 of the All’s Fair in Love and War Series. SPN | Dean Winchester x Reader

19. A Wee Bit Of Domestic by @massivelycreepypineapple​ Request: 11th Doctor x Reader. Just a bunch of fluff, they both have crushes on each other. And the reader gets hurt and the Doctor goes into full protective/helping mode. Then ends up admitting his feelings. DW | 11th Doctor x Reader

20. Tortoise Speed by @ohwowreallycool​ You and Bucky make-out. You treat him but are nervous about your own treat. MCU | Bucky Barnes x Reader Warnings: Smut-ish, oral (male receiving), nervous partner, some language

Anyway by @girl-next-door-writes​ Bucky has always feared that he wasn’t good enough for her, and when the full extent of his past is revealed that will that fear become a reality? MCU | Bucky Barnes x Reader

21. Before by @impala-dreamer SPN | Dean Winchester x Reader

Smoke Screen by @opheliadawnwalker3​ Prompt: Modern day Steve uses SHIELD technology to make himself appear pre serum and tiny and uses his gentlemanly guise to lure reader into liking him. Only to reveal his muscular form. MCU | Steve Rogers x Reader Warnings: manipulation, sexual content and dark unhinged Steve

22. Smoke Screen Part 2 by @opheliadawnwalker3​ MCU | Steve Rogers x Reader Warnings: coercion, manipulation, stalking, sexual content, dub con, non con, violence

23. Little Minx by @saiyanprincessswanie​ Dark!Steve drugs the reader with sex pollen and has his way with her multiple times. Bucky finds out what Steve is doing and tries to convince him that it is wrong. But, once Steve shows Bucky how good the reader is during drugged sex he can’t help but have his way with her too. MCU | Steve Rogers x Reader, Bucky Barnes x Reader, Steve x Reader x Bucky Warnings: Dubcon, Smut, Sex Pollen, Oral sex M & F, Fingering, Multiple Orgasms, Threesome, Cussing, Spanking

Gif Drabble by @girl-next-door-writes MCU | Steve Rogers x Reader

24. Can’t Give You Love by @helahades​ You take Steve home after a night out, celebrating your graduation. You fall asleep. Steve decides he hasn’t had enough. MCU | Dark!Steve Rogers x Black!Fem!Reader Warnings: Smut. NSFW. Somnophilia, Delusional Steve. Justification of terrible thoughts via Steve’s POV. Mentions of blood and violence. Steve pretending to be a good guy.

25. Six Or One? by @letsby-writes​​ Y/N would never have thought that Earth’s mightiest heroes would find her desirable. When Captain America opens the floodgates, she finds herself going after a full set. But did that night with Steve mean more than she thought? MCU | Steve Rogers x Reader, Avengers x Reader Warnings: explicit smut - no readers under 18 please. Reader gets it on with each of the Original Six, two of them at the same time. Fluff. Voyeurism.

26 - 30. Healthy Competition by @kittenofdoomage​​ Sam and Dean embark on a mission of utmost importance. SPN | Sam Winchester x plus!size reader x Dean Winchester Warnings: Eventual smut, low self-esteem, anxiety, plus size reader, bullying, fluff and some kinky business.

[wistfulcynic]

Three Non-Blondes, 4 /4

I have managed to keep myself in check this time and not extend the chapter count yet again. This is it! The silly end to this very silly story. I hope it makes you guys laugh. I snort-laughed while writing it but I’m never sure if that’s because it’s funny or because I’m a dork. Anyway, massive thanks for the comments, likes, reblogs, etc, they are as always gratefully received and much appreciated 💕

Summary: Mary Margaret is certain that her fiancé’s sister Emma and his best friend Killian are perfect for each other. What she doesn’t know is that they think so too. Matchmaking hijinks ensue.

Rating: T

AO3

Chapter 4: 

The very next morning Killian was just stumbling into the kitchen to make himself a cup of tea and put some coffee on for Emma when Mary Margaret’s face appeared on his phone, accompanied by a buzzing that despite being his normal ringtone somehow seemed terribly foreboding. 

“Oh, what fresh hell…” he groaned, feeling very much as though he really could not be dealing with this before he’d even had his tea. Caffeine was the very least of what he would require if he were going to stand up to Mary Margaret’s next attempt to matchmake him to his own girlfriend. 

Not that he’d ever called her that before. Nerves fluttered in his belly at the thought of it. 

As much as he and Emma had enjoyed turning Mary Margaret’s plan on its head the day before, Killian found he was becoming weary of the entire situation. He didn’t want to be fending off setups as a regular thing. Or watching Emma fend them off. Or fending them off for her. 

He wanted there to be no more setups to fend off, full stop. And from the glint in Mary Margaret’s eye last night he knew that the only way to prevent them would be to come clean, to tell their friends they were together and deal with the fallout. 

He and Emma needed to talk, to figure out where they wanted to go with their relationship. If they both felt the same. 

But first they needed to strategise. There was a battle-ready Mary Margaret to deal with, after all.

Bracing himself, he picked up his phone and hit ‘answer.’ “Good morning, Mary Margaret, to what do I owe this very early pleasure?” 

“Ah, Killian, I’m glad you’re awake. I hope you don’t have any plans for this afternoon.” 

“As a matter of fact, I—”

“Because I was really hoping we could have lunch together. I really need to talk to you.” 

“Oh really? Wha about?”

“Um, I have some wedding plans I’d like to discuss with you.” 

“You want to discuss wedding plans with me. Plans for your wedding.”

“Well, yes. There’s only four months left now until the big day and as the best man you’ll naturally want to be involved in the planning.” 

Oh, she was playing dirty now. 

“Aye, but I thought I’d just speak to David—” 

“Yes, yes, of course, mostly David, it’s just there are a few things I wanted to be sure we’re on the same page about, you know, before you two make any irreversible decisions.”

Killian suppressed an eye roll. 

“And anyway,” Mary Margaret continued mercilessly. “It’s been so long since I’ve seen you, I thought we could catch up.” 

“You saw me last night!” 

“But you left so early we didn’t get a chance to talk. Come on, Killian, it’s just lunch. We’ll go to the pub, super casual.” 

Killian felt the jaws of the trap sinking into his leg but was powerless to prevent them. He may as well go and see what all this was about, he thought, it’s not like there was any real danger. He and Emma would have time to put a contingency plan in place before he left, and how much harm could Mary Margaret really do over lunch? “What time shall I be there?” he asked.

—

Arriving at the pub that afternoon he found Mary Margaret waiting for him, accompanied, he observed with a sense of weary inevitability, by a tall woman with wild, curly hair and a predatory smile that nearly rivalled Killian’s own. 

“Oh, Killian, look who I ran into!” cried Mary Margaret, the picture of innocence. “This is Milah, she teaches at the high school. It’s so fortunate we happened to be having lunch together, Milah’s been wanting to meet you for a while and I really think you two will have a lot in common.”  

“Aye, I’m sure,” said Killian, shaking Milah’s hand as her eyes boldly roamed his form, very obviously liking what she saw. Attempting to rise to the challenge he gave her the best approximation he could muster of his old, flirtatious grin. It had gone a bit rusty since he’d been with Emma. “Lovely to meet you, Milah.” 

“It’s a pleasure,” Milah purred. 

Danger, danger! Killian’s instincts were screaming. This one means business.

Mary Margaret’s eyes were glowing with triumph, and Killian knew he’d been had. He grasped desperately for his phone. “If you would excuse me for a moment ladies, I just need to send a quick text.”

Killian: SOS!!!

He placed his phone on the table in what he hoped was a casual manner and turned his attention back to the women.

“Milah loves your books,” said Mary Margaret, pointedly. 

“Oh?”

“Love them,” enthused Milah, looking at him with a wide-eyed appreciation that he sensed was genuine. “I teach AP English and I used to work in a publishing house. I know good writing and yours is just amazing. I’ve been a fan since your travel writing days.” 

“Oh, indeed, that’s, er, very flattering.” Killian’s eyes flickered back to his phone, but it remained resolutely silent. In one slick, sweeping move he palmed it and swept it under the table, hoping he could manage to type coherently without looking. 

Killian: Pub, now. 

“Would you believe I didn’t even know you lived here?” said Milah, batting her eyelashes. “Do you think you might come speak to my class sometime, they’d be thrilled. Several of them are interested in writing as a career, your story could really be inspirational to them.”

Mary Margaret’s triumph was almost palpable, and Killian had to admit this was a clever move. Milah was just the sort of woman he’d have been all over a few years ago, and her blatant flattering of his vanity was softening him despite himself. Now a casual invitation to be inspirational to some kids, which would mean definitely seeing her again, which could then easily turn into drinks, then dinner…

As plans went, especially plans of the sort Mary Margaret tended to conjure up, this one was good. And how could he possibly refuse?

“Aye, lass, it would be my pleasure.” He kept the smile on his face even when Milah squeezed his hand in gratitude, even as he was typing frantically with the other one. 

Killian: Need rescue. 

“Oh, my goodness!” cried Mary Margaret, with an exaggerated glance at her watch and just an insultingly bad attempt at sounding surprised. “I can’t believe I forgot I have a dress fitting today! I’m so sorry, Killian, to invite you out and then abandon you, but let’s definitely do this another time.” 

“It’s quite all right, I can—” 

“Now, I absolutely insist that you stay and have lunch with Milah. Isn’t it lucky I ran into her! You two can talk about her students and plan your visit to them. Really, I’ll be insulted if you leave now and your lunches are on me, I’ll leave my tab open at the bar.”

“Mary Margaret, it’s truly not necess—” 

Mary Margaret skewered him with her eyes. “I insist, Killian,” she said, and Killian suddenly had a new appreciation for Dave’s persistent unwillingness to cross her. 

Milah attempted a casual shrug, that was barely more convincing than Mary Margaret’s surprise. “I don’t mind,” she said. 

Killian surrendered to the inevitable. 

“Then I would be delighted,” he said, and took his phone out from under the table. If they could be shamelessly blatant in their deception then so could he. 

But where the hell was Emma? 

Killian: Help me, Obi Swan Kenobi, you’re my only hope. 

That at least should get her attention. He hoped so anyway, he’d been holding on to it for a long time. 

But her reply didn’t come and before he knew it he was sitting at a cosy corner table with Milah leaning in and giving him a smile with an edge that would have delighted him before he’d met Emma, and Mary Margaret was pressing menus into their hands and telling them that the tab was all taken care of and to have whatever they liked and then she was gone, and Killian was beginning to think this might actually play out exactly as she’d planned when thankfully, finally his phone buzzed in his pocket and he clutched at it as a drowning man to a life raft. 

Emma: ok ok, no need to start desecrating Star Wars with your terrible puns. I’ll be there in ten 

—

He spotted Emma immediately when she entered and with a hasty excuse to Milah about needing the restroom, he leapt to his feet and grabbed her, dragging her to a quiet corner of the pub’s outdoor beer garden. 

“Killian, what the—”

“I can’t take this anymore, love.” He wrapped his arms tightly around her and rubbed his cheek on her hair. “We have to tell them. It’s the only way to make her stop.” 

“Who?”

“Mary Margaret. She’s unrelenting.” 

Emma scowled. “Wait, did she actually try to set you up again?”

“Aye, the latest offering is in there now. No, don’t look! Don’t go, darling, just let me hold you for a minute, it gives me strength.” 

“You’re an idiot,” she said, but she squeezed him tightly around the waist and kissed his jaw. 

Killian sighed and stroked her hair. “I want to tell them,” he said after a long silence. “Not just to stop the matchmaking, but because I want them to know. I want to be able to go out with you and touch you in public, and spend quiet nights in together without having to lie about it.”

“Yeah” said Emma, and he heard relief in her voice. “I want that too.” 

Joy suffused him. He pulled back to look at her face, at her green eyes shining with an emotion that made his heart soar. “Really?” he croaked. 

She smiled, the joy in his heart reflected in her face. “Really. Definitely absolutely one hundred percent.”

Okay so maybe a run-down beer garden full of empty pint glasses and plates covered in congealed cheese (they really needed better busboys in this place, he’d mention it to Ruby the next time he saw her) outside a pub where he was probably technically on a date with another woman might not be the best place imaginable to tell the love of your life how you feel about her for the very first time, but Killian could choke the words back no longer. 

“God, I love you,” he breathed.  

Her smile brightened, impossible perhaps when it had already been so bright but he swore it did. “I love you t—”

“AHA!” cried a voice from the doorway, both triumphant and accusing, sending them leaping apart. “I KNEW IT!”

“Bloody hell!”

“David what the fuck?”

“I knew you two were secretly together, I knew it!” David pumped his fist in the air. “I am a good detective, take that Mary Margaret!”

“What?”

“You knew!”

“Eh, I’ve suspected for some time,” he lied shamelessly, triumph edging into smugness as he regarded them. “Now you’ve confirmed it. Good thing you two used the L-word, though, or I’d probably have had to punch you on principle, for banging my sister.” He clapped Killian on the back, heedless of said sister’s dark scowl.  

“Mate—” Killian began in a warning tone as Emma bristled.

“Banging me?” she hissed. 

“No, no, don’t worry, I’m not mad,” said David, and Emma’s bristle became sputtering indignation. David was too busy rubbing his hands in glee to notice. “What I am is pretty damned excited to tell Mary Margaret. Hahaha. Let’s go right now.” He turned to go, then realised they weren’t following. “Well, come on!” 

“No,” said Killian, taking Emma’s hand. “We’ll do this in our way. And right now there’s someone we need to speak to. Before we speak to Mary Margaret.” 

He disliked the idea of Milah being used as a pawn, he owed her an apology and also he had an idea of how he might make it up to her. 

“But—” sputtered David. 

“Look, why don’t you go find the great matchmaker and bring her back here in an hour or so,” said Killian. “Don’t tell her why, though. Please, David.”

David was clearly disappointed, but he was also a good friend. “Okay,” he said. “See you soon.”  

Killian looked down at Emma. “Ready, love?” he asked, and she nodded. Hand in hand they went back into the pub and over to the table where Milah was waiting. Her face lit up when she saw Killian, then fell almost comically when she saw his hand linked with Emma’s. 

“Milah,” he said, offering her an apologetic smile. “I’m terribly sorry about all of this but I suspect Mary Margaret may have... misled you somewhat. I’m sure it was completely unintentional.” No need to stitch up his friend, he thought, however much she may deserve it. “This is Emma,” he continued, easing the woman in question slightly forward. “My girlfriend.” His lips curled into a goofy grin as the word fell from them, and Emma’s cheeks flushed pink on hearing it. 

“Ah,” said Milah. 

“Aye. You see it’s all rather new between us and we didn’t want to go public until we were sure how we felt. Our friends are somewhat… enthusiastic in their involvement in each other’s lives, and we didn't want to be dealing with that kind of pressure.” 

“I do see.” Milah’s eyes twinkled, her disappointment beginning to look more like amusement, and Killian’s grin widened. He liked this woman. 

“Look, let me try to make this up to you, at least a little,” he said, pulling a small ivory card from the inside pocket of his jacket and handing it to her.

         Edward Teach, it read

         Managing Editor

         Jolly Roger Books, Ltd

“My editor,” Killian explained. “He’s been personally responsible for discovering and publishing at least ten bestselling authors over the last five years. He’d make an excellent speaker for your class.” And I suspect is very much your type, he thought but did not say. 

Milah smiled. “Thanks,” she said. “It really was a pleasure meeting you. You too, Emma.” She stood and gathered her bag and jacket. “And good luck. I have a feeling you might need it.”  

—

An hour later Mary Margaret stormed into the pub trailed by David, Regina, and Robin to find Emma and Killian sitting across from each other at their group’s usual booth. They were chatting companionably, a basket of onion rings on the table between them, looking for all the world like a pair of platonic friends having a friendly drink. 

“Hey there, chaps,” Killian greeted them cheerfully. “Mary Margaret, how was the dress fitting?”  

“What? Oh, yeah, great. Dress is beautiful.” She put one hand on her hip, the other one gesturing between Emma and Killian. “What the hell’s this?”

“It’s funny that I didn’t know you had a fitting,” remarked Emma, ignoring the question. “Seeing as how I’m your maid of honour and all.” 

Mary Margaret waved this away. “Yeah yeah, never mind all that, what happened with Milah? Where is she?”

“Oh, she left,” said Killian.  

“Left?” 

“Yeah. I put her in touch with my editor, he’d be a much better speaker for her class and I really think they’d hit it off personally as well.” 

“Do you.” Mary Margaret’s voice dripped venom. 

“Oh, aye. They have a lot in common.” He offered her his blandest smile and casually helped himself to an onion ring. As he popped it into his mouth Mary Margaret’s eyes grew saucer-wide. 

David twitched. 

Robin winced. 

Regina actually gasped. 

Killian swallowed the savoury bite, and a gleeful grin slowly spread across Mary Margaret’s face. 

“Sooo,” she said, grabbing a chair from a nearby table, pulling it up with its back to the end of the booth and flinging her leg over it, folding her arms over the back as she sat. “How long have you two been sleeping together?”  

Emma and Killian turned to face her wearing identical expressions of astonishment. 

“What—” 

“How the hell—”

David, Robin, and Regina were chortling, elbowing each other. Robin shook David’s hand.

“Oh, come on, it’s obvious,” said Mary Margaret.  

“Mary Margaret you have spent the past two weeks trying to set us up with other people—” 

“I only did that to push you together—”

“Yes, we’re aware—”

 “—Looks like I could have saved myself the trouble.” 

“—Only you could come up with a plan that convoluted,” said Killian. “But how did you know— We didn’t do anything—” 

“You just ate one of Emma’s onion rings and you’re still alive,” Mary Margaret pointed out, preening like the detective at the end of a TV show explaining how she solved the crime. “Not only alive but unharmed. She didn’t even flinch.” Mary Margaret leaned forward on her backwards chair, stabbing the air with her finger. “Emma Swan would never let anyone take her onion ring unless it was true love,” she declared.  

“Bloody hell.” 

“Well, she’s not wrong,” conceded Emma. “David tried to take one once in high school and he’s still got the scar.” 

“Right here,” said David, displaying a gouge mark on the inside of his wrist exactly the shape and curvature of Emma’s fingernail.

Keeping his eyes on Emma, Killian took another onion ring, the biggest one in the basket, and ate it slowly. She watched him, smiling softly. “I love you babe,” she said. “You can share my onion rings any day.” 

A delighted sigh rippled through the group and Mary Margaret wiped away a tear. “I knew you two were perfect for each other,” she said. 

[darthsuki]

Fic Rec Tag Game

Post your fics you are most proud of! No limit on how many, just the ones you look at and just feel so pleased that you wrote something so great! Tag as many people as you like to get them to share their own fics! 2k19 is the year we love our own fics babes!

Though I have been a writer in some form or another for as long as I can remember, I didn’t have any sort of online presence until around roughly 2010;  in fact, my first ever online account was on deviantArt!

I’ve made a lot of strides in the last decade with my writing, both in the craft itself and my perspective on how it can impact people in all sorts of wonderful ways--so below is a list of the works that have been important, beloved, or otherwise influenced my experience as a writer. 

If anyone has ever been curious about my older works or the things that have been imperative to making me the writer I am today, I’d say it’s worth taking a peek--you might find something new of mine to like! ;3c

Truth Within (Star Wars, OC/General Grievous, chaptered fic)

Truth Within was (and still is) one of my most beloved writing projects--somewhat because, fun fact, it’s the first fanfiction I’ve ever written! 

Truth Within is a Star Wars fanfiction based in the prequel trilogy, specifically in the Clone Wars era. It features the adventures and coming-of-age of Sakajin Takio, a young woman with a calling to right the wrongs of her mother and become her own person in the process. Along the way she’s challenged to learn the ugly consequences of war, the pain of loss, and the worth of protecting those she cares for--all while trying to handle being the apprentice of General Grievous as a member of the Separatist forces.

Originally posted to fanfiction.net in the late 2000′s and having been overhauled at least twice since, this piece represents how I’ve matured and improved as a writer. Sakajin has grown as a character in much the same way I like to think I’ve grown as a person, so much that she remains my proudest creation to this day.

I love this fic with all of my heart and have a universe worth of things plotted, planned, outline and half-written for it, though hilariously due to the fandom and the very specific ship it contains (Sakajin and Grievous) it doesn’t attract a lot of readers--still, it remains one of the biggest and most influential projects that I hold dear, and I really hope that one day I can make it into something it deserves to be.

Memories of You (Star Wars, General Grievous, chaptered fic)

Another passion project, but much (much) more recent than Truth Within. The story follows the reader as once a lover of General Grievous when they had been left for dead as a servant. After the general dies and they are left alone, the reader is shocked to realize many months later that he’s actually alive--and is in fact the acting general for the Separatist armies. Drama and tension unfold as the two of them try to figure out how to move forward, having to balance the joy of reuniting with a lover and the reality of war and the danger it presents.

Drabblewatch (Overwatch, fic/drabble collection) [NSFW]

What started as a reblogged prompt list spiralled into something absolutely amazing; after writing so many fills, I decided that it would be smart to make a blog to host the specific content and, one thing led to another, and Drabblewatch was born as the very first of many other writing blogs that I would make for reader-insert content.

Started in 2016, Drabblewatch remains one of my most popular writing blogs and series, pushing me almost entirely into the reader-insert community where I have found no shortage of excitement, fun, satisfaction and encouragement. Though I haven’t touched this blog or fandom in quite a while, there’s still a lot of content for it.

...and, fun fact, I actually met my eventual fiance @blood--hunter because of my Drabblewatch writing ;3c

Just Off the Highway / Just Past the Mountains (WTNV, Cecil & Kevin, chaptered fics)

My entrance into the WTNV fandom is, compared to the rest of the fics on this list, a rather recent event. With the nature of the series and the encouragement of the fans of my writing, I have been able to create a lot of absolutely fantastic things--these two fics are perhaps the best examples of what I’ve been able to create thus far. JotH is a introduction fic putting the reader and Cecil together, while JPtM is similar in intent but pairing the reader and Kevin instead.

As the Sun Sets (Critical Role S2, Mollymauk, oneshot)

The reader is a member of the Fletchling and Moondrop Carnival, taken in when they decide that they may earn more coin for their musical skills on the road than at the mercy of those in their home city. They have grown close to many of the members of the carnival, Molly especially, and the reader learns that they may have more talents in magic than in music.

It’s a simple fic, but one that I absolutely adore--namely because I want to create far more content in the future for the Critical Role fandom. I’ve debated making this a multi-chapter fic, but I suppose only time will tell.

And perhaps, maybe one day soon, I’ll even have a Critical Role writing blog... ;3c

Reader-Inserts: A Guide & Background

 Omegaverse: Everything You Need to Know

These two entries are interesting, largely because they’re not actually fanfiction or such at all--they’re guides, and ones I’m rather proud of at that.

The first one is a guide for reader-inserts, detailing as much information about what they are, ways to write them and other bits of information from my years of experience in writing for the community. Though it’s by no means the only way to write such a lovely form of fiction, it’s a means for me to try and pass on as much of my own knowledge and experience as possible to normalize reader and self-insert fiction in this internet community of ours!

The second one is more of an informational perspective for a specific AU or trope, commonly revered to as omegaverse or A/B/O. It’s half-headcanon, half-background info, and from what I’ve heard has helped a lot of people understand this one interesting AU or universe setting in the fiction around them.

A Day on The Throne (MCU, Loki, oneshot) [NSFW]

If anyone wanted to know what my very first reader-insert work was, then the mystery has finally been revealed: it was with Loki! My first year of writing reader-inserts were a little clunky and utilized the ‘y/n’ system, but it’s interesting to compare this first work with what I write now, especially in making sure that my works are more accessible to people regardless of gender, sex, background or ethnicity. 

I’m certainly not perfect, but it’s nice to see that I’m always getting a little better than before!

Being a Human (Lover) (Daft Punk) [NSFW]

Being apart of the EDM (Daft Punk) fandom I think is actually where the last nail was put into the coffin for me, at least in terms of dedicating a lot of my time to reader-inserts as a speciality. 

The community was small and inviting, and a lot of people really encouraged my work and my potential as a writer to do bigger, better things. I actually met a lot of awesome people through the fandom, and to this day I consider @slowpokemegan one of my greatest friends and I am quite blessed to have met her because of this very fanfiction.

Collection of Suki’s Best Smut(tm)

Below is a list of what I consider some of my best smutty writing, though it’s absolutely not exhaustive since apparently out of the 150 fics I’ve posted to AO3, almost 80 of them are explicit and smutty in some form or another--consider these but a taste of what my writing career has created thus far :3c

Touch Me (RWBY, Ozpin)

It’s Best to Keep Me Pleased (RWBY, Torchwick)

Phone Call (FnaF, Phone Guy)

Silvairre’s Little Secret (FFXIV, Silvairre)

Lay Me Down to Sleep (Fallout 4, Maxson)

Heart-On (Undertale, Sans)

Audio Transmission (Lifeline, Taylor)

Touch Me, Have Me, Make Me Yours (The Dragon Prince, Aaravos)

Just Off the Highway (WTNV, Cecil)

Mine, Mine, Mine (WTNV, Kevin)

Have Me (Voltron, Lotor)

We’re Goin’ Down (LoZ: BoTW, Sidon)

Intimacy (Daft Punk)

[chocochipbiscuit]

Writers’ meme

I was tagged by @thewindysideofcare of care!

This little tag meme is an opportunity for writers to reflect on (and promote!) our own writing, but also to hear about the work of our fellow writers and to find something new to read!

Rules: answer the following questions about your own writing, whether fanfic or original. If you can’t/don’t want to answer a question, just put N/A. If you don’t have that many posted works, tell us about your WIPs or individual chapters/drabbles or even your ideas! Then tag as many writers as you like :)

AO3 name and link, if applicable: ChocoChipBiscuit, here and everywhere!

What’s your most popular fic, by whatever metric is most relevant to you (hits, kudos, comments, reblogs, some other trait)?

I’m using comments because I no longer track kudos, but I do like knowing what stories resonate with people enough to inspire a comment or open a conversation.The fic with the most comment threads is Jinxed (Fallout 3, Fawkes/F!LW), which makes me a little proud and embarrassed. Jinxed is my earliest story, a whopper 103k word story that was posted chapter by chapter over about a year. It’s extremely rough in a lot of places, there are a lot of things I would do differently with it now if I rewrote it, plus a lot of things that I would completely cut.

It’s not my most representative work in terms of skill, but it is one of the earliest stories and characters that still remain dear to my heart. Fawkes/F!LW (or Fawkes/LW in general) is a pretty niche pairing, but I am glad for the conversations it has opened and the way I could see myself grow as a writer throughout the story.

I am also cheating slightly and including Overflow (Fallout 4, Danse/Strong), because the sheer length and number of chapters in Jinxed means that I don’t think anything else will outdo it in terms of comments. Overflow has the second most comments of anything I’ve posted. It’s still a mutie-fucking fic but at 20k words, it’s much more concise than Jinxed. I am fully aware that a lot of the initial clickthroughs are morbid curiosity, but I like that I’ve been able to sell the premise well enough to still draw people in and maybe sell them on a ship or idea they hadn’t considered.

What’s your favorite fic that you’ve written?

*pained whining* I try to like at least something from every fic I post, but it’s hard picking favorites. I fully admit my answer may change if you ask me on a different day, but right now my favorite is we sleep in secret places (Dragon Age 2, Isabela/Merrill). I like it because it incorporates a lot of emotional warmth and affection and character development with the smut and kinks, and I think it’s something where my love of the characters really shines through. Plus I think it has some of my better-written sex scenes.

What’s your best fic, and is it different from your favorite fic?

My best fic is always the one I haven’t posted yet. :P

Jokes aside, either we sleep in secret places (DA2, Isabela/Merrill) or Compartmentalization (FO4, Haylen/F!SoSu) for character voice and sense of mood and atmosphere. I think these are two of my better-written stories at this time, but I personally like we sleep in secret places better because it doesn’t ache my heart as much.

Do you have a fic whose popularity surprised you?

Another Wonder of Thedas (Dragon Age Origins, Alistair/Zevran) is one that surprised me just because I had forgotten what it was like to write popular characters for a popular fandom, vs my usual attachment to rarepairs. This was a fic that was fun to write, plus tentacles were a niche thing I hadn’t written a lot with before, but I was expecting the tentacles to shoo readers away. Shows what I know!

Do you have a fic you wish more people would read?

Things That Can’t Be Found (Fallout New Vegas, Beatrix/Calamity/Keene) is one of those stories where I am fully aware that it’s a niche ship for a smaller fandom and with some kinks that are a little on the edge of fandom norms, but… it’s also something I’m proud of. I enjoy the characters, I enjoyed writing them, and it fits so squarely in My Brand of Smut With Feelings (™) that I wish more people gave it a chance.

That small whine aside, I am still fully aware that it’s a niche ship with niche kinks, so isn’t everyone’s cuppa.

Is there a ship or fandom you haven’t written, but really want to?

Shadowrun! I absolutely loved playing Shadowrun Dragonfall and Shadowrun Hong Kong, and I have been telling myself ‘hey, I should really write that…’ for a while. I also fully admit that I am slow to dip my toes into a new fandom though, so even though I have some ideas scribbled down, I would probably have to replay the games before I feel comfortable writing anything for them.

Tell us a random fact about your writing process:

I’m constantly juggling a dozen ideas or story starters at any one time, and it’s a matter of picking which idea seems the most interesting or fun. Part of my process for myself this year has been acknowledging that sometimes, just because something is in-progress or has a complete draft doesn’t mean that I have to finish it; if it no longer excites me or if I can no longer see the original spark that drew me to the thing, that means that either I need to change projects or revise it until I am excited by it again.

I am tagging @anneapocalypse, @wolffyluna, @drmadisonli, @ialpiriel, @soothseay, @xyndario, @sistersmash, and @matredaen. As always, tags are just for funsies, so ignore if you’d rather not play. If you want to play but I didn’t tag you, you are still absolutely free to steal this. :)