#I listen to some of her songs sometimes. Don’t get me wrong. But being told I have the VIBE of one feels offensive

[deathxproof-archive]

Hi can someone tell me why a customer looked at me today and started her order with “well, first of all, are you a Swiftie???” and when I said “no?” the conversation ended. What vibes did I send off. Why.

[strniohoeee]

Can you do one with Chris where he overstims the reader until they use the safe word??🩵

Brutal

Pairing: Chris Sturniolo X Female Reader

Synopsis: Chris has been in one of his moods lately, and when Y/N doesn’t like it….Chris gets a little upset, and takes his anger out on her. This is for this request I got, and another request asking for an angry Chris🫂

Warnings⚠️: This is SMUT!! There’s spit, smacking, use of the word slut, dom Chris, overstimulation, and I think that’s all🤭

Song for the imagine: Bathroom, Hotel-Montell Fish

⚠️This is an 18+ imagine, so minors do not interact, or do??⚠️

I wasn’t too sure what was wrong with Chris lately, but he’s been so aggy and rude, and I had given him some space for a few days, because honestly me and a rude Chris equals me cursing him out and telling him to leave

I hadn’t seen him in three days, and we texted here and there but he was back at the house with his brothers. Nick and Matt created a groupchat with me and not Chris to tell me how fucking annoying and rude he’s been.

I honestly wasn’t shocked. Chris gets like this every few months. He gets all bitchy and annoying, and usually I have to fuck him, so he gets whipped back into shape. But I wasn’t his mommy, and this behavior had to stop

Nick was texting the groupchat about the latest issue between them

-Y/N Chris is so fucking annoying I’m not even sure how you deal with his annoying ass….like I’m about to put his ass out, and change the locks on the door-Nick

-It’s that fucking bad? What’s the issue now???

-He started complaining while we were filming about how the car video was stupid, he was hot, he was annoyed and that Nick and I couldn’t get our shit together-Matt

-The fuck is wrong with this kid?? Is he a fucking child?

-He might as well be. We had to stop filming because he started cursing like crazy, and started to hit us and shit. He fucking knocked me in my mouth and I started to bleed-Nick

-he’s so fuckkkg ridiculous…like I’m getting tired of putting up with this shit….

-Yeah, and then when we went back home, he started going off about the garbage not being done, and the fucking dishes not being done, but like when I told him to do he started flipping the fuck out-Matt

-Where’s he now??

-in his room yapping like an annoying bitch-Nick

-oh brother…let him calm down he’s having a temper tantrum

-yeah..put his ass in time out next time you see him -Matt

-I sure will LMFAOO

An hour had gone by, and I was just at home chilling. I had showered and I was reading a book when I got a text message

-Chris is on his way over to you…he literally flipped out on us again-Matt

-oh brother….time to play mommy with this kid

-LMFAOOOO lord help you idk how you do this-Nick

About thirty minutes later I heard my front door open, so I knew it was Chris

“Babe” he called out

“In my room” I yelled to him

I heard his Timbs hit the ground in thumps, and then suddenly my door busted open

“Yo” he said taking his hat and shoes off at my door

“Yo? Am I your homeboy” I said raising an eyebrow at him

“I’m not in the fucking mood” he said bluntly

“Oh excuse me…you better fix your attitude because I’m not doing this temper tantrum bullshit” I told him shutting my book and placing it on my nightstand

“Listen I’m not in the mood okay. I just want to see my girlfriend and decompress” he said walking over to the bed, taking off his shirt

“Yeah, and you’re not going to come in here with an attitude and bark at me about what you want to do in my HOUSE” I said rolling my eyes at him

“You piss me off sometime” he said looking over his shoulder and scoffing at me

“Well then….the doors right there Christopher” I said to him

“Stop fucking doing that….stop fucking calling me Christopher and talking down to me like I’m some fucking child whenever we get into an argument” He said giving me his back

“Don’t act like a fucking child, and I wouldn’t have to do this” I said to him

“I should fuck the shit out of you right now, so you know your place” he said running his hands through his hair

“Please Chris….we both know I fuck the SHIT out of YOU” I told him staring darts into the back of his head

“I’ll fuck you so hard you’ll won’t even know where you’re at” he said finally turning around and looking at me

“Try me then” I told him

Immediately Chris got up and came over to me looking down at me like I was his prey

He grabbed my neck and immediately my hands grabbed at his hands, and he smashed his lips into mine sloppily making out with me

He pulled away still looking down at me

“Fucking slut” he said and smacked me. I loved when he did that

He roughly grabbed my boobs through my shirt, squeezing them hard

“Can’t wait to fuck you dumb” he said ghosting his lips over mine

He removed his pants and was just down to his underwear’s.

“You’re so hot when you act like this” I said removing my shirt

“Shut up” he said pulling me in by my neck and making out with me, he then roughly pulled me away

“You gonna use that big fucking mouth of yours to suck my cock?” He asked

“Whatever you want” I told him

“Good…I trained you well” he said

He took his underwear’s off, and stood in front of me before once again grabbing me by my neck to bring me up to eye level with him

“Open your mouth” he said, and I obliged

He spat into my mouth and pushed me away

“Fucking suck my dick” he said sternly, and I immediately went to his dick

I started to lick the tip before hallowing my cheeks out

“Fuck yeah…so hot when you’re not barking at me and just sucking my cock” he said immediately putting his hands in my hair to push my head down causing me to gag

“Awww too big?” He said in a mean way

At this point he was just face fucking me. I was gagging and my eyes were watering non stop

“So good to me, but I’m ready to fuck you” he said immediately pulling me off of his dick

He swiftly removed my underwear and flipped me over so I was on all fours

“I love when I get to fuck you like this” he said smacking my ass

“OW ASSHOLE” I yelled at him

This caused him to pull me up by my hair causing me to wince

“Watch the way you fucking talk to me doll face” and then he threw me forward

He smacked my ass again and then massaged the ache away, spreading my legs and spitting on my pussy

“FUCK, CHRIS” I yelled out moaning into the sheets

He slowly rubbed his cock up and down my pussy causing me to whimper, and then suddenly he slammed into me

“CHRISSSSS” I moaned out loudly

This only amped him up because he started to pound into me so fast and hard I couldn’t even think at all

“Taking me so well like a good slut” he said smacking my ass and fucking into me

Chris was gripping my waist so hard while pounding into me non stop, I had never been fucked this hard by Chris and I was loving every second of it

“FUCK FUCK FUCK” I started screaming out as he drilled into me

“Take it slut fucking take it” he said grunting from behind me

Chris attack wasn’t slowing down, and I was drooling all over my sheets….he was literally fucking me dumb

“Is she drooling everywhere….pathetic” he said smacking my ass again

“CHRISTOPHERRRR” I yelled out

He grabbed my arms and started to pound into me, my nails scratching and digging into his arms….he would for sure have marks

“Chris Chris I’m gonna cum” I yelled out, and immediately came all over his cock while moaning like a bitch

“I didn’t say you could cum…just for that you’re giving me two more” he said

“No Chris I can’t” I said whimpering

“YES YOU WILL” he said pulling out of me, and flipping me over to face him

He smacked my cunt and then spat on my pussy again. Causing me to moan out

He immediately slammed into me causing me to shiver because I was so sensitive still

“Youre gonna take it, and you’re gonna take it good” he said slamming into me and coming down to leave sloppy kisses all over my neck

I had my legs wrapped around his waist while he relentlessly pounded into me. I started to grip and scratch at his back

“FUCK CHRIS” he screamed out scratching harder

“Fuck baby keep doing that” he said as he started to kiss my neck and slowly taking one nipple into my mouth

“Oh god” I moaned out throwing my head back

Chris was pounding into me, and then suddenly he brought his hand down to my clit to start rubbing ruthlessly

“FUCK FUCK IM GOING TO CUM” I screamed out gripping onto his hair with my right hand

“Come on baby you still owe me one more” he said as he fucked into me harder

I felt myself clench down on Chris, and suddenly my back was lifting off the bed as I was cumming all over Chris’s cock again

“AHHHH” I started to yell out as my nails scratched harder

“One more” he said still pounding into me

“CHRIS NO NO” I said moaning out

“YES” he said, and continued to pound into me

Causing me to whimper and tears to form in my eyes

“Keep on baby cum on my cock so I can fill you up” he said thrusting into me harder

Chris was pounding into me so hard my mouth fell slack and my eyes shut. He was grunting above me and his sweat started to drip down onto me

“Oh fuck Chris” I said as I felt another orgasm beginning to form

“Come on baby give it to me” he said thrusting into me harder

“FUCK” I screamed out as my legs began to shake and I came all over Chris again. I was seeing flashes of white, and my body was shaking from how hard I just came

Chris soon came into me while moaning out my name with a slack jaw. He was fucking into me still trying to ride out his high

“ROSE ROSE ROSE” I started to scream out our safe word as it was becoming too much for me. He immediately pulled out

“Sorry baby. Are you okay?” He asked coming and laying next to me

“Yes baby…it was too much” I said weakly

“I’m sorry my love” he said running his hands through my hair

“It’s okay…that felt amazing” I said looking at him with lazy half lidded eyes

After Chris had fucked the shit out of me he had to help me to the bathroom, and we showered together, and went to lay back in my bed

“I’m sorry for being such a dick” he said stroking my hair

“It’s okay baby. You just gotta talk about your feelings more” I said kissing him on the cheek

“I’m trying, I will do better” he said kissing my forehead

“I love you, and know that I’m always here to talk to you” I told him

“I love you too baby, and yes I know that, so from now on I’ll come to you, so I’m no longer in these weird funks” he said to me

That night we fell asleep in each others arms, and the next day Nick had asked me to come over so we could have a pool day, so Chris and I got ready and headed back over to his house

When we got to the house Nick and Matt were already sitting in the pool chairs getting ready to get in the water at any moment

“Heyy guys” I said as Chris and I walked over to them

“Hey Y/N…..how’s the baby?” Matt asked laughing at Chris

“He’s better now” I said looking over at Chris and pinching his cheeks

“Fuck off” he said laughing and pulling away

We had all been sitting around for 20 minutes before deciding to get in the water

Chris removed his shirt, and when he turned around to jump into the water my mouth dropped

The scratches….he had scratches all over his back and arms

“No wonder he’s in a good mood” Nick said looking over at me

“Oh my god” I said starting to giggle

“The fuck ya talking about” Chris asked turning around

“Your back looks like you got into a fight with an animal” Matt said

“No wonder my back was burning” he said rubbing his chin

“Yall make me sick” Nick said

“Sorry I was fucking the shit out of her last night that would explain the good behavior on my part today” Chris said smiling at them

“CHRISTOPHER” I yelled, and then pushed him into the water

When he came to the surface he reached up and pulled me in by my arm. That day we spent the whole day in the pool, laughing, chatting and just have a good time

I kind of want Chris to get in those moods more often….loved the way he treated me yesterday

The End

Alright here’s some Chris smut for yall! Hope you enjoyed and I hope the people who requested this liked it🖤🖤 thank you all for 365 followers . This is insane like a week ago I had 60 followers??🥹🥰

-J💅🏽

[corrodedcoffins-blog]

The Weeklong Date (pt.2)

main masterlist

spencer reid x famous!reader universe

word count: 1.6 k

warnings: suggestive, a lot of taylor swift references

It was the fifth day of Y/N staying with Spencer, and he went back to work yesterday. And staying with Spencer for a few days they’ve built a sort of routine, that was sort of housewifey, Y/N would sit in bed and watch as Spencer got ready for the day; tucking in his shirt, that Y/N found so adorable. Spencer would always kiss Y/N goodbye, and kissing Spencer every morning was a luxury Y/N doesn’t think she will ever take for granted. And while Y/N waited for Spencer to come home for lunch, she was starting to write more and more songs for her next album, or sometimes she would read the books Spencer kept beside his bed. She had started reading ‘The Great Gatsby’ she had always wanted to but it was never the time. 

But her favourite time of the day was when Spencer would come home during his lunch break. Spencer hadn’t been telling Y/N, but everyday when he leaves for lunch, getting back the team was hounding him wondering where he left too. Of course he didn’t tell them, wanting to keep their relationship private for a little while longer. But he never did miss the knowing look Penelope sent his way. 

-

After Spencer’s long day of the team questioning where he’s been, and having to explain why he couldn’t come to the bar with them and that they couldn’t talk him into it like they usually would. Spencer just wanted to spend time with Y/N, take her on a date, hopefully something private enough that she wouldn’t get noticed. And Spencer had a idea he thought was perfect.

Walking through the front door he sees Y/N curled up into his couch, with one of his cardigans on, reading one of his books. Seeing Y/N so openly use his things, and clearly being so comfortable in his space, Spencer felt this overwhelming sense of possessiveness over her. Wanting nothing more than for her to be his. 

“Get dressed, we’re going out.” Spencer urged, grabbing onto Y/N’s forearms to lift her off the couch.

“Where are we going?”

“If I say it won’t be a surprise.”

“I didn’t know it was a surprise. I thought I told you I don’t like surprises, don’t you have an eidetic memory? You should remember that.”

“I do remember, I just don’t believe that you hate them as much as you say. I am also a profiler so I can tell these things.”

-

Surprisingly it was already dark out, but that was a good thing, because Spencer had decided to take Y/N on a late night drive, to go get ice cream. He still hadn’t told Y/N and to say the least she wasn’t too happy with his choice in doing that. 

“Where are we going, Spence?”

“Y’know children often ask the same question, either because they are hoping that the answer will change or because they didn’t understand the answer. Now applying that to this situation, I know you understand me, so I can only assume it’s that you're hoping for a new answer. So I’ll just tell you I’m not giving you another answer.”

“Where are we going to go?” Y/N asked in the darkness of the car, seemingly ignoring what Spencer had just said. Don’t get her wrong, Y/N loves when Spencer rambles, it showcases how smart he is, which is something she greatly loves about him. And she definitely listened to every word he said, but what she doesn’t like is when he uses his knowledge against her.

“You’re impossible.” Spencer said, quickly glancing at Y/N before looking back to the road and continuing, “Having a distraction technique can be a very healthy way of coping with a situation, so how's the construction in your building going?”

Y/N’s apartment building in New York, had a flood while she was away and have been doing construction the last week.

“It’s going good I guess, it’s going to take a little more time then they initially thought, because they found some pipe that was in the wrong place. So I rented a place on Cornelia Street.”

“That’s good.” The car had stopped at a red light causing them both to look towards each other. There was no way to explain it but the air between them had shifted, looking into eachothers eyes, Spencer’s glancing down to Y/N’s lips. He pauses for a moment, before gently pressing his lips to hers. After another moment Y/N pulls back to look back into Spencer’s light brown eyes, a beautiful chestnut, her lips falling open as if to say something, but no words coming out. But only for a moment, until she speaks.

“Spencer, I love you.”

This causes Spencer to hesitate, It was at this moment that Spencer realised, god he loved her. He loved her more than any other girl he’s ever been with, and they weren’t even official, they weren’t dating, on paper they weren’t anything. But they were so much more. 

After a few moments of pondering, thinking about how deeply in love he was with a girl he met a month ago, a car honks behind them the light had turned green and the cars in front of them long gone, causing Spencer to pull over to a side street before he responds. 

“I love you too.”

“Oh, thank god, I thought you were going to say you didn’t love me back. ‘Cause I know this is soon and it’s a bit of a delicate situation, I mean we aren’t even dating-”

For the first time in Spencer’s life it was him cutting of someones rambling. Grabbing Y/N’s hands to grab her attention.

“Hey, I love you. And I want to be with you. I don’t think it’s too soon, sure most couples fall in love four months into a relationship, but when has either of our lifestyles been like most?”

Spencer says, causing Y/N to laugh before she fully realises that they’ve said ‘I love you’ to each other. Then Spencer continues, “I love you. And I want you to be my girlfriend.”

“Yes!” Y/N says, jumping into Spencer's lap and passionately kissing him. 

He loved her. He is her boyfriend. And he loves her. His love was a secret Y/N was more than willing to keep.

“Know where are you taking me?”

“To go get ice cream.”

“Yay!”

-

That night the couple had read The Great Gatsby together, after making sweet, feverish, emotion filled love together, right where they lay now. Y/N laying between Spencer's legs, her back on his stomach, wearing only a clean pair of Spencer’s boxers, with Spencer wearing a pair of Y/N’s favourite pyjama pants on him. Spencer had the book in his hands, with said hands resting on Y/N’s boobs, in order for them both to see the book. No other reason. 

The two both loved this post orgasm bliss they had, spending time together, it was just simple. Reading together, Y/N asking any random question that pops into her head, knowing Spencer will have the answer, like now. 

“I saw today that shrimp can see more colours than humans. How is that possible?”

Before Spencer could answer, a knock interrupted the two, Y/N saying she’ll get it, then getting up to get the door, throwing one of Spencer’s sweater vest overtop of herself.

The popstar answered the door, coming face to face with one of her boyfriend’s co-workers, Derek Morgan. Maybe the worst member of the team to find out this way. Seeing Derek, Y/N became very aware of what clothes she was wearing, or lack thereof. 

“Derek Morgan.”

“Y/N.”

Pulling down the sweater vest of Spencer’s Y/N says, “Um.. You’re looking for Spencer I assume?”

“Yes, I am.” Derek says, not before looking Y/N up and down taking in her appearance. 

“Okay, yes. I will get him. For you.”

Derek mumbles a quick ‘thank you’ before Y/N softly shuts the door after their awkward conversation and runs into Spencer’s bedroom, where he is lying on his bed, still clad in a pair of pyjama pants and shirtless.

“To answer your question about shrimp, the mantis shrimp can see more colours due to it’s-”

As Spencer starts answering her previous question, Y/N places her hands on the sides of Spencer's neck to gently interrupt him. 

“My love, I normally would never cut off your rants, because I love you and I love your brain. But Derek is outside waiting for you.”

“What? Derek? Why is he here?” Spencer says, jumping out of his bed, putting on a shirt. Much to Y/N’s displeasure. 

“I don’t know, I didn’t ask. I just tried to get out of there fast because I’m only wearing this.”

“Derek saw you like this?”

“Hon, don’t be jealous.”

“Why were you answering the door dressed like that anyway?”

“I thought it was our dinner.” Y/N innocently said, genuinely thinking it was their dinner they had ordered. 

After getting dressed Spencer opens the door, him now coming face to face with Derek, Y/N staying out of view in the kitchen 

“Hey, pretty boy.”

“Hi. Um.. Wha-What are you doing here?”

“Other than clearly disturbing your romantic evening?.. Hotch called, we have a case and I was close by so I said I would pick you up. I thought you would be alone…”

“Oh, well I’ll get my go bag and we can leave. Come in.”

Spencer left the door open for Derek to enter the apartment, walking down the hall to his room. Derek walked inside, not even having a chance to talk to Y/N, as Spencer was speedily reentering the room.Spencer presses a quick, loving kiss to Y/N lips, they mumble their goodbyes, before Spencer ushers himself and Derek out the door. Derek and Y/N yelling out their own goodbyes before they’re gone.

“You’ve got a lot of explaining to do, pretty boy.”

[cupiddior]

NANA — huh yunjin

WARNING — fluff, swearing

★☆

huh yunjin was conflicted.

she’s never liked someone so much, like she feels like it’s actually concerning how much she likes you.

you’re the leader of new jeans just two years younger, she never thought that she would actually like someone younger than her and despite you being younger than her you actually intimidate the hell out of her.

she just thinks that the way you got so popular so quickly is a little scary I mean global vivienne westwood ambassador only five months after debut ?!

that’s crazy.

should she also mention that you’re her best friend jimin’s little sister ?

“oh my god.” yunjin looks up as he best friend dramatically flops at the end of her bed. “yn is driving me crazy.”

yunjin stomach turns just at your name. “how ?” she asks.

jimin sits up and looks at her. “I’ve seen my little sister’s face my whole life, and I love yn but when I become an idol it was a little nice to have a break from her, but now I see her face EVERYWHERE I mean billboards, poster, on my social media.”

as jimin continues to rant about you, yunjin gets lost in her thoughts I mean jimin wasn’t wrong your face was everywhere not that yunjin was complaining she loves seeing your face, well sorta, how is she supposed to try to get over her best friends little sister if she sees her everywhere ?

“BUSES I MEAN BUSES YUN.” yunjin snaps out of her thoughts as jimin finally stops her ranting.

“but that’s besides the point, I was talking to her this morning and why didn’t you tell me you guys were doing a duet on kbs ?” we are ? “she told me her manager told her this morning.”

“uhhh…” yunjin trails off trying to find an answer did her manager tell her and she just wasn’t paying attention ? probably

“that doesn’t matter.” jimin cut her off. “ I came here to tell you no funny business.”

“what do you mean ?”

jimin let’s out a deep sigh “I MEAN no funny business, no flirting, no touching no nothing, just singing, I know how you are yunjin.”

“I cannot have my best friend dating my little sister, first you’re the only thing I have that she doesn’t and also if something happens I’d be put in the middle.”

she then wraps her arms around yunjin. “ so no funny business right ?”

“yeah.”

“so what songs do you have in mind ?”

yunjin heart flutters as you smile at her.

she’s so pretty

I wonder how it would be if we were dating

“um hello ?” you wave your hand in her face.

“um sorry.” yunjin stutters as she scrambles to get her notebook, her cheek heating up in embarrassment.

“it’s okay.” you laugh, you look down at her notebook. “so, have any ideas?”

“um so I wrote down some songs like, kingston by faye, lover by taylor we could also do gorgeous by Taylor.”

“so love songs ?” you ask cutting off her rambling.

“um no..” yunjin trails off looking at her notebook. “there’s… uhh… yeah love songs.”

“sorry.”

“no it’s okay I was just teasing you.”

“you could tease me anytime you want.”

“what ?”

“huh, what ? nothing, i didn’t say anything.”

“um okay.” you laugh. “how about we do the last one on your list.”

yunjin looks at the last song and her face heats up “sofia ? are you sure.”

“I’m sure.” you say “I’ve listen to it sometimes it’s a good song to cover.”

“yea okay, sure let’s do it.”

you and her spent the rest of the next couple weeks splitting up lines and practicing and yunjin felt herself falling for you even more.

today was the day you guys actually film the duet.

“I’m nervous.” she whispers to you.

“don’t be.” you wrap your arms around her’s “we will do amazing especially you.”

wow are you trying to kill her.

“really.”

“I wouldn’t be saying it if I didn’t believe what I was saying.”

“actually.” you turn away from her and and pick up a little box. “I have something for you.” you give the box to her.

yunjin brushes her fingers over the lettering on the box Vivienne Westwood.

she opens the box to see two necklaces, obviously it was the icon westwood planets but hanging on one was a little strawberry and the other had a black star.

I’m in love could she get any better ?

“they’re for both me and you.” you say as you pick up the one with the strawberry hanging on it. “help me put it on.”

yunjin gently puts the necklace on you turning herself around implying she wants you to put hers on as well.

after you finish putting hers on, you turn her around and wrap your arms around her.

yunjin freezes.

“no touching” it’s not like I’m the one touching her so it shouldn’t matter right ?

“are you ready?” you ask her, letting her go.

“yep.”

“good.” you grab one of her hands and pull to to the set. “let’s do this.”

yeah let’s do this

the cover was a hit, fans were going crazy over not only the song choice but the necklaces ? thats what confused yunjin weren’t they just cute necklaces with charms ?

NEW JEANS YN AND LESSERAFIMS YUNJIN GO VIRAL OVER COUPLE NECKLACES.

the duo was seen in their hit cover wearing vivienne Westwood’s new exclusive couple NANA necklaces.

fans were already spiralling about the song choice but the necklaces are just the icing on the cake.

which leaves us wondering are is the yn of newjeans dating lesserafims yunjin ?

I guess they weren’t.

yn you sneaky little shit.

“YOU’RE DATING YN UNNIE.” eunchae barges into yunjin room.

“NO.”

“then why are you guys wearing exclusive couple necklaces ?” eunchae asks her facial expression says I just caught you in a lie.

ding (yunjin’s phone.)

“I’ll explain later.” yunjin pushes eunchae out her room and locks the door ignoring eunchae protests.

yunjin picks up at the phone and her heart drops.

jimin bae 😜

sofia by clairo ? couple necklaces?

oh shit

[placeinthisworld]

ttpdta review part one 🤠

let me preface this by stating that i am a swiftie first and person second in this situation. i have grown up with taylor and feel as if shes my big sister- yes i can make fun of her but if i see anyone else do it i will get fiercely protective. i do understand her music is not only art but also her form of therapy. that being said, throughout these nonsense notes i am constantly mentioning that taylor should go to therapy. i am aware of what she has said about therapy (and why she doesn’t go) but i would beg to differ with her…especially after this album release lol.

taylor is an extraordinary storyteller and song writer. i believe this album is full of evidence of that, but it also has some faults that prevent from being as good as i felt like it could have been. overall the album feels rushed.

i also feel like it’s important to recognize the elephant in the room. i know we probably all expected this to be a joe breakup album, so the fact that it turned out to be a “fuck you matty healy” album shook us all a little bit. i know matty had a controversial history, im not gonna sit here and defend him. i don’t know much about him other than what is forced against my will. i do however know that he struggles with mental health issues/ substance abuse/ addiction. i’m not gonna comment much about his personal issues, i don’t feel like that’s right and taylor’s constant references to drugs throughout ttpd definitely rubs me the wrong way. i should also mention i grew up with an active addict and do view things from that perspective, so i feel slightly triggered by the topic and my feelings about that may just be personal but i do mention that in my notes when it’s relevant.

lastly, i am not a music production girlie idk shit lol. i only know i am a aaron dessner stan so any song with his name im already biased towards and i am aware, if u don’t like that idk what to tell u lol. i just know what i feel like is “good” or “bad” but music is subjective🫶🏻

1. Fortnight:

Hate the functional alcoholic part. Like the beat, the chorus is catchy. One thing i love about a taylor swift song is that theres always a story and its always visual. I like the metaphor of the “good neighbors” of like having this teasing/ longing feeling for someone that you could have had a life with. “Your wife waters flowers/ i want to kill her + my husbands cheating/ i want to kill him” feeling like you were robbed of her life, feeling “all my mornings are mondays stuck in an endless february” reminiscing about the short period of time where you were together and convinced it would last forever (only for it to end before it even started). I do not listen to much post malone but i enjoyed his verse!! So many florida references we get it everything bad happens in florida.

i have not seen the video yet oooopsies

2. Ttpd:

i thought this was the opening of Hey Stephen (the remix) or something at first. gotta say i absolutely love the way she sings “you left your typewriter at my apartment/ straight from the tortured poets department” i enjoyed the vibe of this song, and lyrics up until the “you smoked then ate seven bars of chocolate (OKAY SOOOOOOO ME CODED NGL I LAUGHED at this point i could let this lyric slide- bit then she had to mention the charlie puth and golden retriever thing and ngl it almost ruins the song entirely for me. Tbh when i first listened to the leak i thought this was a fake AI song and that i was sending around a fake leak bc these lyrics started to get a little weird to me. ‘Sometimes i wonder if youre gonna screw this up with me/ but you told lucy you’d kill yourself if i ever leave” …………girl i am begging you to see a therapist (side note did anyone else have a friend in hs whos bf would say that shit a lot?? I remember straight up fighting with a friend who refused to break up w her bf bc he would threaten to end his own life is she did and he was like 16? If an adult is saying that same shit i would be Very concerned not gossiping about it???) “i chose this cyclone with you” my first reaction was: ride the cyclone the musical? Overall i liked the first half but you lost me at charlie puth (hes the one with eyebrow right? I think i get him and miles teller mixed up) (i dont know who either of these men are)

3. My boy only breaks his favorite things:

Okay tbh i thought this was gonna be one of my least favorites, but the total opposite happened. I think this is one of my top 5 favorites on this album. I do think that there is a difference between a poem and a song and that they are not always interchangeable. I feel like if this was edited into a poem it would be KILLER. The visuals, the the story, the vocabulary, the sadness in it. “Im queen of sandcastles he destroys/ There was danger in the heat of my touch/ once i fix me/ hes gonna miss me/ i felt more when we played pretend then with all the kens / cause he took me out of my box” i feel like ever since folklore, taylors been trying to push these big fancy words and sometimes it feels awkward and forced, but this is one of the rare songs that doesn't suffer from that.

4. Down bad:

meh. Chorus is catchy. I dont love the narrative “fuck it if i cant have him/ i might just it would make no difference” but i also have never once experienced that over a person before lmao……….taylor go to therapy. Nothing really stands out about this to me otherwise. No offense, but it sounds like a generic jack antonoff song lol. Like maybe if another artist released this, i would enjoy it more but idk i wouldnt expect it from taylor i guess. Just kinda feels boring to me sorry if u enjoy it <3

5. So long, london:

oh man were done with british men now for real for real. “ two graves one gun. I'll find someone” its over for joe and matty (but thats fine if all she has to say about joe is what i think she said on this album i am happy i think We Get It…) Aaron dessner i love u (remember when he reposted me on his ig ahh).”i kept calm and carried the weight of the rift/ pulled him in tighter each time he was drifting away” + “I stopped trying to make him laugh/ stopped trying to drill the safe/ i didnt opt in to be our odd man out/ im pissed off you let me give you all of that youth for free” oof i FELT that one a LITTLE too hard. I think this is both a song about matty and joe- i think she had a life and an attachment to london just in general through both relationships, “im just mad as hell because i loved this place” and so reflecting back on how both are over and how all those plans with either are done. “You sacrificed us to the gods of your bluest days” OKAY kinda hate this phrase bc it feels like shes placing blame on whomever’s mental health/ depression, like as if they made the conscious decision to sacrifice the relationship solely. This very much feels like “how much sadness did you think i could take before i got bored???” overall top favorite songs bc it doesnt have too many cringey or odd lyrics and the production is 10/10 thank u aaron dessner ilysm king

6. But daddy i love him:

tbh when i got the leak this was the first song i listened to bc i thought it was gonna be the worst one and i wanted to get it over with (i was RIGHT until she dropped that second half……..) and i DIDNT have the lyrics obviously so i couldnt for the life of me figure out if she really said “im having his baby…..NO IM NOT!” until the VERY end of the song and bro…….the cringe. The cringe. The cringe. This is also when i started to question if this was real or if i was passing out a fake leak, lol. I dont understand how she could be saying this shit about matty. And like we all know it lol. “Sometimes growing up precocious sometimes means not growing up at all” …….but like does it??? I feel like thats kinda an oxymoron or something like i understand what shes trying to say and MOST of the time her metaphors and comparisons make sense to me but like this one doesnt. Growing up precocious means to grow up more advanced in maturity, how would that also mean not growing up at all? Is it just me getting stoned and overthinking things? “Ill tell you something about my good name/ its mine alone to disgrace” true that bestie ur doin a great job by being so politically quiet over the past couple of yeats after making a whole asss documentary about wanting to be on the right side of history. But I digress i am just one of those bitches performing soliloquies you'll never see. Overall this song is very weird and cringey imo and i wish it stayed in whatever vault it was sitting in lol.

7.Fresh out of the slammer: “In the shade of how he was feeling” -_- dont like this narrative already. I could honestly go on a rant about why i dont like this song but im going to spare for the sake of my sanity in this review of thirty one fucking songs but its along these lines “to the one who says im the girl of his american dreams” oh brother. otherwise i dont care for many of the lyrics, the chorus/ melody/vibe is mid i guess. It sounds like another jack song (i was right)

8. Florida!!!: “all my friends smell like weed or little babies” okay i know what she was trying to say but im SORRY you cant tell me she couldnt think of ANY other way to say her friends are either parents partiers lmao. Deserves jail for that but luckily the vibe and the chorus of the song are really catchy and florence’s voice is beautiful in it. “Well me and my ghost we had a hell of a time/ yes im haunted but im feeling just fine” CHILLS i loved it. I didnt think i would like this song but (maybe as much as i like no body, no crime which is meh) but no i lowkey love this song and think its really fun. Once again the drug references start to get heavy here in the album and like i mentioned i do get slightly triggered by drug mentions.

9. Guilty as sin?:

okay taylor we get it you masterbate. Another strong jack song and it’s pretty similar to others on the album so nothing besides the sexual lyrics stand out.

10. Whos afraid of little old me?:

“if you wanted me dead you should have just said/ nothing makes me feel more alive” ooooooooooh i love that. I feel like a live or an acoustic version of this song would give me CHILLS. “Is it a wonder i broke / lets hear one more joke/ then we can all laugh until i cry” honestly so relatable, “i was tame, i was gentle til the circus life made me mean” oh :( that hurt bc it just reminds me of the vibe shift during midnights era/ eras tour where it *feels* like she started to pull back from being taylor swift and started to become Taylor Swift (™) and the way her fans/ media has treated her made her mean or cold or something and that just makes me feel sad. “Whos afraid of little old me? You caged me and then you called me crazy! I am what i am cause you trained me! SO. WHOS. AFRAID. OF ME? Again the narcotics line kinda makes me feel icky but thats bc i have that thing about drugs and just dont LOVE all the references to them. Like i know its not that serious but theres a reason why i dont seek out artists that typically talk or write about that stuff ya know so its weird. Overall i think the production is one of the most unique ones on this part of the album.

11. I can fix him (no really i can):

i hate it all around i think. I hate the narrative of “i can fix him!! I can handle a dangerous man!!! No really i can!!!” there is a reason why this song is barely 3 mins long lol it should have been cut but i think taylor wanted to Be Edgy. i dont care for the productions or the lyrics, its very forgetful imo.

12. Loml:

okay i really thought this was gonna be a joe song (rip) so i was thinking it was gonna be really deep and sad and like it IS but with the context of it being the pt 2 fling with matty it doesnt seem like it now. Anyone who thinks this is not about matty please look at the lyrics and be so serious “whos gonna stop us from waltzing back into reklndled flames/ if we know the steps anyway” I think matty just said too much shit to taylor during their fling and taylor WAS truly convinced this her invisible string and he promised her a lot that he couldnt upkeep and ghosted her and she took it SUPER hard, i mean two breakups in one year is a lot (me, whos never been through a single breakup once). I just dont understand how she feels like matty is the greatest loss of her life. One of my favorite tracks on the album, “our field of dreams engulfed in fire/ your arsons match your somber eyes” a LOT of these lyrics are actually really good imo. I think im the only one that didnt find the “mr. steal your girl and make her cry” line idk i thought it was actually kinda neat, the phrasing of it, kinda contradicts the title “love of my life” because he was never that serious or respectful of her and only use her from the beginning. This is another song that i think would make KILLER poem over song. Overall i think the piano is haunting and a live version of this will make me die, thank u again aaron dessner 10/10

13. I can do it with a broken heart:

ngl i thought this was the opening to mastermind for a hot second- also gave me a scare on whether or not this was a fake leak lol. Catchy ass chorus but very YOYOK. “Breaking down i hit the floor/ All the pieces of me shattered/ as the crowd was shouting “more!” ooffffffff seeeeee that is exactly WHAT i was afraid she was feeling durning the eras tour after the joe breakup/ matty situation and all these stupid twitter and tik tok swiffers were out here overanalyzing EVERYTHING and demanding rep tv like every other day. “Im so depressed i act like its my birthday” …….okay taylor. Like a lot of people have said, i think she interchanges “depressed” for “sad” a lot and the two are not the same. I think taylor wrote this song (but specifically the “i cry a lot time but i am so productive” and was like “yup this part is gonna go viral on tik tok,” initially i wrote “feels like taylor saw that depression barbie commercial in barbie 2023 and wrote a song based on that” lol which i still agree with. Overall the production of this screams midnights reject lol, very jack antonoff. Over time this song has grown on me a lot. Originally i didnt care for it but now its kind of a bop but i think its bc its so similar to YOYOK. “Try and come for my job” @taylorswift deadass you couldn’t think of anything else to say instead. cmon. I was mostly on board until that very last part, just seemed very cheesy lol like its not a big deal but i thought it delivered well without it.

14. The smallest man who ever lived:

(aaron thank u for saving me and this entire album) “they just ghosted you/ now you know what it feels like” OUCH. “i dont even want you back i just want you to know/ if rusting my sparkling was the goal/ and i dont miss what we had but can someone give/ a message to the smallest man who ever lived” oh this was somber af. I am obsessed with the phrasing of the chorus. I also LOVE taylors deeper voice its def giving me the same feelings MTR gave me from folklore, that made me CRY and this was very similar. This is another classic taylor song that i could EASILY write like a ten page essay about if someone put a gun to my head. I know that its about a *romantic* relationship, but it feels general enough to be able to relate to anyone who is close to someone with an addiction or struggles with substances. A lot of addicts dont understand the impact of their addiction or their behaviors that they display while struggling. To meeeeee, this feels very much like “you were self centered and betrayed my trust, was any of this true? Real? Am i paranoid or is this that deep?” “it wasnt sexy once it wasnt forbidden” has me thinking lots of things. I think that describes taylors “type”if that makes sense? Like i said i would need to literally break this song down line by line like its ridiculous i have too many thoughts about this song i have listened to it on repeat six times by the time im typing this. “In public showed me off/ then sank in stoned oblivion” FUCK. “you treat her like an also-ran” honestly i have never heard of that phrase/word thank u dr. swift. “Were you sent by someone who wanted me DEAD/ did you sleep with a GUN underneath OUR BED/ were you writing a BOOK?/ were you a sleeper cell SPY? IN 5O YEARS WILL THIS BE ALL DECLASSIFIED?/ AND YOU’LL CONFESS WHY YOU DID IT!/ AND ILL SAY GOOD RIDDANCE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” tears were formed besties. Also love the gracie abrams reference. “And you deserve prison but you wont get time” i feel like is very metaphorical like you DESERVE to be punished for what you did to me but you won’t admit to the guilt, you wont admit your wrongdoings, you wont admit that i would have done anything for you and you have no problem replacing me. “You said normal girls were boring/ but you were gone by the morning” first of all red flag girlie, nonetheless heartbreaking. “And in plain sight you hid/ but you are what you did” i say this with all the love in my heart, someone take taylor swift to a really good really private therapist. I could say more but i think i need to move on because i am now on my eighth cyle of listening to this song.

15. The alchemy:

already kinda hate it. “What if i told you im back/ the hospital was a drag/ worst sleep i ever had” do you think taylor swift has ever been admitted to a real hospital in this context. Feels very out of place and like i said earlier i dont love the psych ward visuals/ references she keeps inserting in this album. “He jokes its heroin but this time with an e” thanks! I fucking hate that line so much. Feels very icky, not funny. I get what shes going for but it falls so flat for me. The football references (yall know my opinion on meathead!!!!!!!! I will not engage!!!) are fucking dumb. Production is kinda lame and uninterested. Will only listen to this song if by force and will not repeat it ive head enough lets move on.

i have Lots Of Thoughts. i don’t think anyone cares about what i have to say though so i don’t think i’ll bother posting the rest lol but i did do a lot of work so ill post just a bit to make myself feel better.

[leasstories]

Lea’s advent calendar day 13 – Scary

@writerthreads writing prompt for Christmas (2022), prompt 12:

[meeting Santa at the mall but it goes awfully wrong]

Dad!Eddie x mom!reader

 No trigger warning.

WC: ≈0.9K

December 22nd, 1991

Eddie Munson and you have been dating since high school. You’re both still living in Hawkins. Eddie works as a bartender at the Hideout at night, so he can be the one taking care of your daughter during the day, while you are at work. As for you, you work as a secretary for Hawkins’ police station. You don’t like your job, but you need the money.

Almost three years ago, you unexpectedly got pregnant. You and Eddie were only 22 years old back then, but you still decided to keep the baby. Now you have a beautiful daughter named Galadriel. Eddie and you both share a passion for The Lord of The Rings, so you had to name your daughter after one of the characters. Now, your little Galadriel is two years old. As she is now two years old and more aware of her surroundings, Eddie and you decided to make a trip to the mall to see Santa.

When you told your daughter, she was so excited, she's been talking about it for days. It warms both yours and Eddie’s heart to see your daughter like this. You pack a diaper bag with diapers (in case of accident) as well as changing clothes, her pacifier, her Teddy, a water bottle, and a milk bottle. You also pack teething biscuits in case your daughter is hungry. While you’re packing Eddie gets the impossible mission to make her get ready.

Eddie takes cartoonish voice and makes her left shoe dance. “Please Galadriel, let me be put on. I promise to keep you warm and protect your cute little feet from being hurt outside.

Galadriel is pouting. “Don’t want.” She speaks.

Eddie is helpless, he doesn’t know how to make his (sometimes) petulant daughter to put her shoes on.

He raises the left shoe and make it dance, still using his cartoonish voice. “Please little Galadriel, let me be on your feet. If you don’t put me on, we can’t go meet Santa you know?”

Galadriel crosses her arms and stomp her foot. “NO” she says raising her voice.

At that point, you arrive into your hallway and asks. “What’s going on here.”

Eddie keeps his cartoonish voice, moving the shoe around to show that it is the shoe speaking. “Little Galadriel doesn’t want me to be at her feet.”

You crouch down in front of your daughter and take the shoe from Eddie’s hand, looking at him sympathetically.

“Hey Bunny, if you want to go meet Santa you have to put your shoes and coat on. We can’t go outside without them. You know, it’s freezing outside.” You explain patiently.

Eddie looks at you fondly. He really loves seeing him interacting with your daughter, he loves how you handle her tantrums.

Galadriel drops her hands and shrugs. “Don’t like shoes.” She speaks.

“I have an idea!” Eddie dramatically says.

Galadriel turns towards Eddie, her curious big brown eyes looking at him.

“What about you put them on, we go see Santa and then we buy new boots for you? How does that sound?” Eddie asks.

She nods her head and let you put her shoes and coat on. You go to the mall, you put some Christmas songs (even though Eddie protested) during the car ride and you giggle at your daughter trying to sing along.

After a 10 minutes’ drive, you arrive at the mall. You’re in the line to see Santa and your daughter looks so excited. She’s holding both you and Eddie’s hand.

“Ready to meet Santa?” Eddie asks when there is only one person in front of you.

“Yes! Yes! Tell him I want guitar. Like Daddy!” she says enthusiastically.

Eddie smiles at that. “And if Santa brings you a guitar, I promise to teach you.”

“Eddie she’s too young to learn how to play guitar.” You tell him.

“Don’t listen to mommy.” Eddie says while covering Galadriel’s ears.

As soon as it is Galadriel’s turn you and Eddie lead Galadriel to Santa’s chair, but as soon as she is close to him, Galadriel hides between her father’s legs and starts crying. Eddie picks her up and whispers sweet nothing into her ears.

“Hey, shh…" he says, "everything’s fine, daddy's here” Eddie keeps going, hugging her close to his chest and soothingly rubbing his daughter’s back. He brings Galadriel and a quieter place of the mall while you profusely apologize to Santa.

“What happened back there?” Eddie asks calmly, while his daughter tries to stop sobbing.

“Scary” she manages to say in between to sobs.

You decide to let Eddie handle it, you know that when your daughter’s overwhelmed, she is a daddy’s girl and only Eddie can make her calm down.

“You got scared sweetie?” he asks and your daughter nods.

Galadriel nods.

“You know, there is nothing to be afraid of besides mommy and I were here.” Eddie gently tells her.

“Daddy? Hug please.” Galadriel says.

Eddie hugs his daughter to his chest and asks her. “What about grabbing a hot chocolate, how does that sound to you Sweetie?” he asks.

She enthusiastically nod.

Your little family sits at a coffee, ordering three hot chocolates. Your daughter hands up with chocolate everywhere and Eddie and you hold hands all along while your daughter tries to tell you all she wants for Christmas. You and Eddie love those family moments, more than anything.

[justkending]

Found Memories. Chapter 1.

Finding Memories Sequel: (I advise you to read the 1st series for context).

Series Summary: Following the aftermath of Finding Memories, Bucky tries to complete goals he feels she would have discovered for herself as a way to let her memory live on. However, he never expected to find someone very close to who he believed she would have been if given the chance of normalcy. A journey of mourning someone he lost, turned into a journey of discovering someone new, happens upon the soldier. Maybe this whole normal thing isn’t as bad as he had pictured it in his mind. Maybe he had a better shot at it than he ever tried to imagine.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader insert

Chapter Word Count: 4000+

A/N (PLEASE READ): So I may or may not have gone back on my deal to not post until I finished writing it all, but I'm 15 chapters in, and though I have a ton more to write, I wanted to drop the first chapter for my Finding Memories people to have some closure, and also to see where Bucky's story plans to lead.

This series is told through 1st person unlike a lot of my others, but I realize I like this style a lot more. So all this is from Bucky's perspective in this chapter. I also understand this may seem a little confusing with this being a reader insert for both these stories, so using Y/N will make it harder to tell the difference between the characters. I’ll be calling our previous Y/N from the Finding Memories series, Sloan, just to avoid confusion. But please don’t let that take away from any of the personal aspects of the story. This is just a continued story of Bucky finding happiness after the ending of Finding Memories. (Just think of it as him falling for you 2x ;) There is a note at the bottom after reading so please read that when you finish!

Last note! For each chapter, I am connecting a song from the playlist our last reader left and Bucky took on his own. The song will play off the vibes of each chapter. You don't have to listen if you don't want to, but it is here as a little piece of Bucky's theme (sometimes thought processes and feelings) in each chapter. Enjoy!

Playlist song: At Last by: Etta James

Chapter 1: 

4 years and 364 days had gone by since her passing.

Almost 5 years, 2 weeks, and 4 days since I had rescued her.

I think the reason it stuck with me was that this was one of those missions that carrying on like normal afterwards, wasn’t really an option.

When you lose someone on the field, whether you know them or not, a piece of you is saddened that someone lost their life. Normal. Human. Emotions. 

However, you feel depressed and emotionally stuck when it’s someone you had become familiar with and plan to continue to grow familiar with. 

It hurt even more when it was someone who deserved to go far in life and learn so many things about themselves in a healthy and safe environment. It was a stab to the heart to know she never saw that for herself and had made a decision no one should be put in the position to make. 

But it happened. In the very likely chance someone was to find her and use her for her powers again, she erased all possibilities of it getting into the wrong hands. And with it erased all chances to experience the good in the world as well.

After she died, Bruce and Tony tested her blood to find what the other mutation was even if I knew for the most part. 

We didn’t have much time to understand it, or for her to really explain all the pieces that came with her enhancements that she seemed to remember the day before her ultimate fate. But from what she had passed onto me in the last moments of her life, I feel like I had some kind of grasp of it. 

Her hand over my heart seconds before her powers consumed her was more than just a sentimental goodbye. She shared within that touch her fears, her intentions, her understandings, and the peace she found in her decision. 

It was something I could never explain in words to someone else, but it was a feeling that made me understand why it all had to come to the end that it did. 

She had told me the night before, that her powers were created from the cosmos, and it was a power that could bring an end to society and the world we try so hard to keep afloat in what feels like constant choppy waters. 

She didn’t have to go into too much depth about what all that meant, but it would soon be proven within hours of explaining to me that we would not get the end we hoped for. 

I can’t lie and say I never expected things to take the turns they did. I live the life I have constantly considering the worst-case scenarios, and her death was always one of those scenarios as soon as we saved her in that hidden terrorist facility.

Bruce and Tony confirmed that her gifts were something that could be world-ending and quickly incinerated her blood so that no one could get ahold of that kind of power down the line. 

The wishes she made on her deathbed were met and I was trying to meet all the other ones she had made and never got the chance to do herself. 

It took me a while to go into her room and start to clean out the few personal items she had slowly gathered in the short time she was there, but really there wasn’t much to clean. 

She had a few plants. I took one and Wanda took the other. Her clothes were either taken by Wanda or Nat and the rest were donated. 

She had some books that had been gifted to her about random things she had found interest in while trying to find herself. A cookbook, a book on herbs and plants she used to read to put a name to the plants on the compound during her walks, and some history books Parker was kind enough to loan her so she could catch up with the world around her. 

The only other thing of significance I found, and didn’t realize was something she kept, was a journal. It was in the nightstand drawer, but it had been hidden under all the other books she had collected. 

Inside, it was a list of notes she made about those she had become close with. 

1. Wanda is from Sokovia and she had a brother named Pietro whom she misses dearly.  2. Nat had a sister that’s on missions across seas and sees her every other month, but they keep in contact when able.  3. Bruce has 7 PhDs but has test anxiety.  4. Tony blast rock music that can be heard 3 levels above. (check songs to see if they spark anything…) 5. Bucky acts like Sam annoys him, but I secretly think they’re just as good of friends as he and Steve are. 6. Steve and Bucky grew up together and from what Nat said, “One looks for trouble the other follows cause he still sees Steve as a 90lb Brooklyn kid.” 7. Sam is from Louisanna and mentioned making a shrimp boil… (Still need to look that up...) 8. Bucky likes to prank Sam and Steve in small ways that they never figure out and it drives them slightly insane. 9. Spiderboy is incredibly smart but is also somehow very naive to the teasing he gets from everyone else.  10. Movie nights are something that everyone gets excited about and they all have very different tastes in movies to show me. So far, I've enjoyed the comedies the most. (Peter picked the movie Grown-ups and some of the things they do make no sense and are extremely goofy, but I think that's why I liked it...)

The list went on for about five pages of random things she discovered and felt were important to know about the team and sometimes even herself. 

But in the back, only found if you looked through each page of the small journal, was a list of things she wanted to try once she felt ready and was given the chance to. 

It didn’t feel right ripping the pages out for myself, or taking the journal and ruining it with my scribbles, so I copied the list in a notebook of my own and added some things I think she would have enjoyed if I was given the chance to show her. 

She only got about 24 things written that she wanted to experience in the real world. Most of which were simple things most take for granted having the choice to do any day. 

Right now I was looking at number seven;

7. Go to a coffee shop and try different drinks with cinnamon in them. Find a favorite, so I can eventually say, “I’ll have the usual,” like they do in the movies. 

It was hard to know what her favorite would have been, but I did the best I could. Eventually, I had a usual at the coffee shop I started the adventure on. 

“He’s back.” The barista whose head was in the pastry display shot up and smiled toward me. “It’s been a minute since we’ve seen you. Life or work in the way this time?” 

“What’s the difference?” I responded though it came across a little more melancholy than I meant. 

Luckily, Trudy, the shop owner, had become familiar with me enough to know it’s just how I talk. 

“Get him the usual, dear,” she said to the worker at the front as she wrapped a muffin and handed it to a customer waiting on the side. 

When the worker just looked at her wide-eyed and freaked out, Trudy laughed to herself and pointed her to another task. 

“Forgot she’s only been here for 2 days,” Trudy’s New York accent was strong as she typed in my regular order. “So. Any big bad guys in the world I should be worryin’ about or do you have it handled?” 

“Nothing for you to worry about, Trud,” I smiled as she grabbed a cup and wrote one of her new names for me on it. She was clever with what she could come up with depending on the day. “Sorry, I haven’t been in. I was sent overseas for a bit the last few weeks.”

“You haven’t come in a month,” she said with a raised motherly eyebrow. 

“Hate to break it to ya, but there are bad guys I have to take care of over here too. They keep me just as busy sometimes,” I chuckled, moving out of the way in case someone else needed to order. 

“Yeah, yeah,” she groaned, grabbing a pastry and wrapping it up for me. “I made a new recipe from my Italian side of the family. Give it a try,” she stuck a sticker on it to seal the bag and came around the counter to give it to me. “Tell me how you like it.” 

“How much?” I went on to grab cash knowing she likely wouldn’t let me pay anyway. 

“Cost ya a review on Yelp,” she pushed it on me more. “I had someone come in the other day and try and cheat the system to get free stuff, and when I wouldn’t budge she lowered my rating on the damn website.”

“I don’t think one bad rating will hurt ya, Trud,” I sighed, taking it and putting the cash in the tip jar instead.

“Eh, I like to counter it with a good one where I can. Plus, I’m running out of fake emails to do it myself. Help a gal out.” 

I laughed knowing she may have been a small hole-in-the-wall business, but she got enough foot traffic to keep her afloat even if she joked about going under if I didn’t give her reviews and tell my friends about it. 

Before I could give her peace of mind knowing I’d help in any way she asked me, the bell rang as another customer came in. 

I looked back absentmindedly and saw a woman with her head down while she talked on the phone, but was kind enough to go to the side and finish her conversation before walking to the register. 

“That drink ready?” Trudy shouted to the back and just in time a barista walked out with the cup of my “usual” drink and handed it off. “I’ll be seeing ya sometime soon, right?” She withheld the coffee until I confirmed. 

“Tomorrow,” I promised knowing I had one thing planned and I knew it wouldn’t be interrupted. 

“Good. Have a good one, Boomer,” she winked and I looked to see the name matched on the cup. 

“What does that mean?” I raised an eyebrow. 

“Something the kids are calling old people like you and me,” she shrugged. “Figured if I was going to be called it, you should too.” 

I rolled my eyes playfully before giving a final goodbye and heading toward the doors. The woman that had come in was hanging up the phone and happened to look up at the same time I passed. 

She had soft eyes and smiled up at me in a polite way before sidestepping and moving to the counter. 

I couldn’t help but stop with my hand on the door handle as I looked at her trying to grasp who she reminded me of. 

She had kind features and her light smile was what made me do a double take. I may have imagined it, but something about her beamed at me in a way that I couldn't shake.

I was snapped out of my thoughts when someone else tried to come in and I quickly opened the door for them and moved out of the way. But I looked in the shop one more time seeing Trudy smiling back at the woman and sharing a similar banter she had with me. 

I honed in my hearing some and caught the middle of the conversation. 

“I would ask if you want your normal order, but it’s been so long I’m not sure if it’s the same,” Trudy teased. 

“The move has been great. Thanks for asking Trudy,” the woman remarked with a laugh. 

It would become creepy pretty quickly with me just staring and eavesdropping in the doorway, so I moved on even if I was intrigued to hear the rest of this conversation. 

I took my time walking to my car since the woman’s face was sticking in my mind. Something seemed oddly familiar of her, but I couldn’t put a finger on what it was. 

________________________

“Hey, I was looking for you!” Sam’s voice sounded as soon as I walked into the kitchen. 

“I’d rather you weren’t,” I said back, going to the trash to throw my cardboard cup away and grab a snack from the fridge. 

“Hardy, har, har,” Sam responded. “But really. I need help with a file I can’t access.” 

“Maybe you can’t access it for a reason,” I gave a smug smile to him as I shut the fridge and took a bite out of the apple I stole from it. 

“You're really channeling that clown energy as Parker would say today, aren't you?” he gave me a straight face before pulling papers I hadn’t noticed beforehand and passed them to me. “It’s just some notes on a mission we did last week, but I need to tweak some things. For some reason, the file isn’t giving me access so I was going to ask if I can go through your account.”

“Have Tony look at your account. Maybe the clearance level got mixed up. He had a new protection server put in the other week and a few accounts were tweaked.” 

“Well, he's not in his lab.”

“Ok,” I dragged out. “Sounds like a personal problem.” 

“Barnes, just let me on your account for two seconds to fix it and then I’ll go and find him. It won’t take me longer than five minutes,” Sam groaned. 

I could continue to give him a hard time, but I needed to get some things ready for tomorrow and wasn’t in the mood to keep up my normal antics. 

“Fine. Where’s your computer?” I huffed, biting into the apple again and waiting for him to bring it to me. 

He smiled like he won, even though I could still say no if I wanted, and grabbed the laptop on the counter and handed it off to me. 

I logged in like normal and went to the file, but was stopped when I came to the same problem he had. 

“What the hell?” I glared at the screen and tried a few more tricks but this new protective program Tony had installed was foreign to me. 

“Damn it,” Sam crossed his arms and sighed. “You’re the third person now. Why won’t it let me see this damn file?” 

I looked at him waiting for him to explain. 

“I asked Nat and Wanda too. No luck,” he shrugged. 

That was strange. It was a file from the mission we had done last week. A thief that had been stealing intel from some division in the SHEILD operations over some classified information, but we had captured and incarcerated the hacker. 

“Friday,” I asked into the void and her voice followed. 

“How can I help, Sargent Barnes?” 

“Why aren’t we able to get into these files?” 

There was a pause as she tried to find the answer. 

“It seems to be in a classification you don’t have access to. Clearance levels are not high enough. Would you like me to call Mr. Stark?”

Sam and I shared a look that showed we were on the same page. There were very few things we didn't have access to, so the system was screwed or not modified after the update. At least that was to hoping it was something that simple.

“No. Where’s Tony at?” I asked instead. 

“He’s headed to the lobby. He has an appointment with Ms. Clark.” 

The name didn’t sound familiar, though there were a lot of people Stark talked to that I never cared to learn about. He was the face of the team anyway, so luckily he handled a majority of the social aspects of our job. 

“Thanks, Friday,” I nodded my head to the exit. 

Sam nodded in agreement and we made our way to the lobby to find him. 

It wasn’t a portion of the compound we were usually in, so seeing people in business suits coming and going always reminded me of the mass amount of workers who never did fieldwork that came and went. 

“Stark,” I shouted once I spotted him at one of the reception desks talking with the secretary that was handing him papers she had just printed. 

He turned at his name and looked at us both confused as to why we would be there. 

“Got a question for ya,” Sam started out. 

“Can it wait? I have a meeting with someone I actually like,” he said sarcastically. 

Before I had the chance to spit something back at him and give him a taste of his own medicine, Sam took over. 

“I need access to a file of the mission report we just came back from, but it’s not allowing me to get to it,” he summed up. 

“Strange,” Tony hummed, looking at the papers he was previously handed as if our issue was nothing for him to worry about. 

“It won’t let me through either,” I said and he eventually looked up rolling his eyes before putting the papers on the counter and giving us his attention finally. 

“Can this wait like 20 minutes?” he asked. 

“It might be because of your new and overly complicated-” I started and once again, Sam saved me from saying something that would probably have Tony ignoring us the rest of the week if I wasn't careful. 

“We’ll wait,” Sam nodded. “We’ll be over there.” 

He pointed to a few chairs off to the side and nodded his head for me to follow. Though I was against the motion, I obliged to not make matters more annoying. I’d give him 20 minutes, but I was just as intrigued by this issue as Sam was now. 

Tony went back to the secretary and grabbed the papers looking through them before grabbing a pen and sloppily marking random things out before handing it back. 

Just as he turned back, he seemed to have spotted who he was looking for to begin with and I followed his eyeline. 

Walking in and looking around marveling at the size of the place before seeing Tony and smiling at him, was the same woman who I had seen at the coffee shop. The same one who was talking to Trudy about a move. 

I must have been staring while she and Tony met in the middle and started casually conversing. She reached into the tote she was carrying and handed Tony what looked like a sweater and a folder, but he only took the piece of clothing leaving her with just the folder still in hand.

My stare must have been unmoving cause Sam nudged me with his shoulder and gave me a weird look when I broke out of my trance. 

“What are you gawking at?” he asked, looking where I was and raising his eyebrows. “Oh, I see.” 

I furrowed my eyebrows and gave him a disapproving look to show his mind wasn’t in the right place. 

“Shut up,” I grunted, slouching some in my spot, but only to show disinterest in an attempt to push him off my case. 

“No, I get it. She’s a pretty lady,” Sam chuckled, crossing his arms and leaning back in his own seat. “Just didn’t see you looking for something like that anytime soon-”

“Don’t get any ideas,” I cut him off. “I saw her at a coffee shop earlier today and she just looked familiar. That’s it.” 

He looked from me back at the girl and turned his head as he analyzed her. 

She was smiling at something Stark was saying and shaking her head about whatever it was he was grinning about. I wasn’t sure what the conversation could even be about, and with the loud echoing space, I couldn’t exactly pinpoint what was being shared. 

“I have an idea,” Sam spoke up after a second and stood up without any hesitance, and walked towards the two. 

“Sam, wait! Stop! What are you doing?” I whisper shouted sitting up and looking around as if someone else was in on this idea with him. 

When he didn’t turn back or let up in his steps, I was quickly on my feet trying to get ahead of him to stop him, but he was walking faster causing us to interrupt the two abruptly and throw them both off. 

“Hi,” Sam smiled kindly at her then back at Stark. 

“I told you I would help you after I talked with-,” Tony started, but Sam patted his shoulder and made him pause. 

“Sam Wilson,” he went on to introduce himself while putting his other hand out for her.  

The woman seemed surprised by the introduction, but she was kind nonetheless and extended her own hand before introducing herself. 

“Y/N Clark,” she smiled. “Nice to meet you.” 

Sam turned to me and she followed his look. I wasn’t prepared to talk to her, but I wasn’t going to be rude and just sit there silently and stare at her. 

I extended my hand as well and she smiled at the motion. 

“James Barnes,” I gave a tight smile, but it wasn’t because of her, it was because I was seconds from punching Sam right in the chest for putting me in this position. 

“Mr. Barnes. Nice to meet you,” she nodded, returning the handshake and it was surprisingly firm. 

I would have paid mind to the detail, but now being in close proximity to the woman, I was seeing features that I hadn’t taken in before. 

She had Y/H/C hair, Y/E/C eyes, and her smile was one I had seen before. She was wearing a bright red checkered winter coat that sat on top of a tan sweater tucked into a nice pair of brown slacks. It seemed fitting for her even if I hadn’t known anything about her. But something in her persona showed she was kind and had a welcoming nature. 

Tony rolled his eyes once again and decided to go ahead and introduce us. 

“Cyborge and Birdman, this is Ms. Clark. She’s Morgan’s teacher. Ms. Clark, these are two of my most impatient coworkers,” Tony motioned to us. “Who I asked to give me a second before I talked with them…” The glare he was giving us pulled me away from staring at her longer than what would have been socially acceptable. 

“Thank this one for the interruption,” I shouldered Sam harshly which he became slightly unbalanced from and gave me another glare. 

“Just seemed rude to not introduce your colleagues,” Sam gritted through his teeth, talking to me when the comment was directed to Tony. 

“It’s fine,” Ms. Clark spoke up, breaking the growing tension between us three, and I immediately turned my attention back to her. “I was here to just drop off these two things anyway.” 

“Yeah, well, I had a few things I wanted to discuss without,” Tony continued, only taking a second in between to send us yet another death stare, “this interruption.” 

“I appreciate what you’re offering, but I’ve already told you I have a job set with another district after this year,” she smiled professionally, and I couldn’t help but smile myself at seeing someone say no to Tony. 

“Yeah, but… Money.” His eat-shit grin worked on the weak-minded, but clearly, she was not that. 

“Money is great and all, but it's not what this is about, Mr. Stark,” she chuckled, readjusting her tote on her shoulder. "Maybe after winter break and I get some paperwork back from the new school I'll be at, we will better understand what I'll have on my plate."

“That sounds like a well-worded way to put this conversation off,” Tony smirked. 

She returned it which proved he was right, but she wasn’t falling for his schemes still. 

“It’s Christmas break, Mr. Stark. Have a great vacation with your family and happy holidays,” she nodded, turning to walk out, but not completely turned away. “You two as well. I hope the world is kind enough to give you all a break as you deserve during this time.” 

“If I know anything about teaching, I know you’ll be needing a break just as much,” Sam shouted in her direction with a smile. 

She laughed at that and it was a sound that made it hard not to smile as a reaction to it. 

“Happy Holidays,” she said one final time, waving kindly and moving to the exit. 

“Well, she seems nice,” Sam grinned in a teasing manner and turned to face us both by taking her place. 

“This is why I haven’t brought her around here,” Tony sighed heavily and ran a hand through his beard. “Now, what do you two want?” 

Sam followed quickly after Tony, who was already walking back to the lab, but I couldn’t seem to pull my eyes from the red checkered jacket that was out the doors now and walking down the steps. 

It was another feeling that I couldn’t quite put into words…

I unfortunately don't have a release date for the next chapter as I am going to stick to my promise of finishing the series before I post any further. This is just to give an idea of what's to come! As always, any likes or reblogs, and comments (even if just a heart or a gif) makes my blood, sweat, and tears for this series feel validated :') ANYWHO!! I'm excited to share with you all the stories to come with this series and these characters because in writing them, I've fallen in love with them myself.

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[iguessitsjustme]

Love Sea Episode 9 Thoughts

I can hear you. What happened to episode 8 liveblog? Did you not liveblog it? I can hear the questions. Here’s the thing. I didn’t watch episode 8. I’m testing a theory that I actually don’t need to watch episode 8. To be clear, I know roughly two things that happened (Mut talking to Rak’s dad and the girls kissing because Mook is helping Vi rehearse lines) but that’s all I know. And if that’s all I know, I should still be missing things from an hour long episode. I don’t think I will be. So I’m testing my theory that I can just skip the episode and still be able to follow along with the story. If I can, it will prove my point about this show’s lazy writing. Anyway, I just finished eating my coco puffs (dinner of champions) and I am ready to watch. Under the cut as always:

The previously on is telling me some things too. Not a whole lot though. This episode should still make no sense to me after skipping an episode.

She is a child. She should not be the one deciding on whether or not her guardians are told something regarding her own safety and also their safety. 

Mut protecting Meena and telling her to get behind him is good. Not telling her to call the police while she is literally holding her phone is bad. Just a quick whispered “call the police” should have happened.

Dear GOD what song is that car even listening to? Stop being noisy and go away I am TRYING to watch!

Okay I appreciate a good fight scene as much, if not more, than the next person, but I cannot figure out where Mut would have learned these fighting skills? Like don’t get me wrong, watching him wail on these two dudes is very entertaining to me but it also doesn’t make sense. What reason would he have had to learn this on the island?

*drinks choccy milk* *gnaws on pickle*

When did his face get hit to be bleeding?

Oh no. Oh dear. I cannot believe this. You have to *gasp* tell the…truth? Only the worst people in the entire world EVER tell the truth. What will become of you? Rak finding out even if you lie…boy what is wrong with Rak finding out something that could POTENTIALLY BE DANGEROUS TO HIM AND HIS LOVED ONES. I cannot do this. I should not be watching this on a school night. Cause I need alcohol. What the fuck is this.

Oh really. I forgot about this show’s desire to use flashbacks all the time. I really don’t need episode 8 because I’ll just get a flashback when needed. God this writing is so…maybe I’ll break my rules and drink alcohol anyways. I think I might have some soju buried in my fridge somewhere….

Oh that wasn’t a flashback? But it was in the previously on?

Oh it was. It was both a flashback and not a flashback. That makes sense. In some world I’m sure.

It is very satisfying to watch Mook push Vi out of Rak’s apartment actually.

I basically just spend this whole show feeling bad for Mook and…no one else.

His dad. No?

I drank all my choccy milk :(

Peat is too good of an actor for MAME. The way he makes Rak so small when facing his dad is so impressive.

As it turns out, blasting Stray Kids does, sometimes, make my neighbors stop having their conversations RIGHT OUTSIDE my door. Like guys. Go talk outside your own door.

God this camera work is making me motion sick. I hate it when they do this. I get it sometimes. I understand the reason it can be good. I don’t think it is necessary here and it just makes this scene that much harder for me to watch.

And this show has done this a lot. I need more stable shots. If most of the show is shot like this, it removes so much of the impact for scenes when it could be very good. And I get maybe wanting to do an inverse where the stable shots are the ones with the emotional impact, but to be clear, that is not what this show is doing. None of the scenes are landing the way they should be landing and the way they are intended to. They are overusing things in this show that should be saved for specific moments. Nothing feels fully thought out in this show. Everything feels like half an idea that was put together at the last minute because they ran out of time. And unless I’m wrong, that’s not the case for this show. They had the time and they just failed to utilize it. This feels like they started creating the show before any plan was created and in place on how to actually do that.

I must admit, watching Mut punch Rak’s dad was satisfying. Especially considering I was pretty much chanting “just deck ‘im." He didn’t punch him nearly enough before getting pulled off of him. Also that was such a poorly directed fight. What was that? Mut basically just laid on top of Rak’s dad with his fist raised and he didn’t punch him again? I would understand if it looked like Rak’s dad put up any sort of fight but it didn’t look like he was really struggling that hard. God Mut should have been feral. Where was that?

I hate that I actually really like the line “You’re the one that took off my collar. Are you prepared to face me?” I really wish it was in a better show. Because up until now, we have had no reason to believe Mut was in any way shape or form dangerous or violent. He was even better than all of MAME’s other semes by actually having Rak’s consent before sleeping with him. So why should I believe he is able to do anything to Rak’s dad other than the show has decided that he can with no contextual support. But god, if Mut had the backup of the previous episodes (and maybe something was explained in episode 8 that I missed but most likely not), this line would being doing things to me because there’s something about a character that’s been kept on a leash, finally being let off the leash to wreak havoc that is just catnip to me.

Having Mut come in and solve everything. Every family problem and miscommunication in 30 seconds (part of it happening off-screen) is so annoying. What is the meaning of the resolution if only one character had to do minimal work for it and it wasn’t the character most affected. Having Mut stand up to Rak’s dad in place of Rak instead of simply supporting him. Showing up and telling him what he learned to give Rak the opportunity to cut those ties himself. To speak up first. It’s just…that whole scene should have been about Rak but instead it was about Mut solving Rak’s problems. It made the drama boring and took away the importance of the moment. It took away from both characters’ development and growth. Mut is a boring character because he is perfect. And even when he does wrong, he actually doesn’t do any wrong. Rak trying to call things off and Mut refusing and immediately fixing the situation was too perfect and that makes a story boring. I don’t want the drama in a show to be boring. I want it to make sense but most importantly, I want it to be entertaining. And if a character is so perfect that they’re able to literally stop the drama during the big climactic confrontation, then the part of the show that should be the most entertaining is now incredibly boring.

This is an insane line to include in a show that half-assed so much of its production I am actually losing my mind. Not a single person involved in this show put their all into it. Actually I take that back. The actors did. But not a single other soul involved in this show. No one behind the scenes gave more than one singular shit if they even gave that. Absolutely insane. What a line. This is just so fucking weird to include in this show. It is so lackluster I skipped an entire episode and missed nothing.

The preview for next week and the tiny drama they’re gonna have means nothing to me after what they just went through. Like seriously? That’s going to be their next issue? After all of that? MAME does this sometimes when she puts the drama out of order so it doesn’t make sense and makes it feels like the characters are actually regressing or like the major conflict never happened in the first place let alone have a resolution *stares daggers at Don’t Say No*

Anyway my experiment is complete. As it turns out, watching episode 8 is not needed. Just having minimal knowledge of what happened is fine and you don’t miss anything. Except possible exposition to explain Mut’s random fighting skills that don’t make sense. But to be clear, if that happened in episode 8, it also is too late for it to work with the context of the story. Just throwing it in at the last second to explain something doesn’t work because it wasn’t given proper thought. Whatever. Only one more week of this and maybe next time I’ll get drunk first. At least maybe then I’ll be entertained.

[owmylasagna-blog]

oh nooo i'm sorry you're sick lasagna :( i'm glad your skates came though that's exciting!! i'll still hit you up for some headcanons if you feel like sharing 👀 id love to hear more of your lore for the eds' parents and perhaps bro...

i'm trying to think of my own indulgent headcanon to share that i haven't already told you 🤔 i will say that your use of shania twain in lps made me hc that edd would secretly be a big fan of hers. i know it's kinda ooc but it's really funny to me. he's a sap and her songs can be pretty sappy. there's also a lot of pedal steel in her music which automatically makes me think of him.

oh also will ed and may's wedding be included in lps?

Thanks! I appreciate the message ❤️ I’m so jazzed the skates came! I immediately did a little shimmy around my tiny ass apartment and might take them for a spin on my street once the rain clears up.

Hmmm time to rack my brain for some other headcanons for the Eds’ parents. Let’s see:

I wrote this in like me still but I think Edd’s parents get a divorce once he’s 18. I sort of hint at this but in my mind his folks are more amicable colleagues than romantic partners: not that they don’t care for each other, but they know pretty early on after having Edd that they are more friends than husband and wife. They do a lot of things out of obligation and respectability.

While I imagine most of the parents in the cul-se-sac to know one another (possibly even have grown up together - we love intergenerational beaf), Edd’s parents are an enigma and literally never socialize. This rubs most of their neighbors the wrong way, really pisses off Eddy’s parents, especially his mom, who takes it super personally (and probably rightfully so).

Sort of a popular one, but I also like the idea of Ed and Eddy’s dads being business partners selling used cars. Or actually, Ed’s dad sort of being Eddy’s dad’s superior 👀.

I think Eddy’s parents (I come them Eddy and Carmela, or Lina for short) are middle school sweethearts. Eddy Sr. threw rocks at Lina during 7th grade recess and she beat him with a fence post and the rest is history.

I imagine Ed’s parents having a pretty big age gap, with his dad being like 10 years older than his mom. We all agree Ed’s mom is a miserable housewife, right? And that his dad is a shellshocked vet? Yes?

Okay this is gonna start out sorta dark but stay with me: in college I read this book called Rampage: The Social Roots of School Shootings which informs a lot of my headcanons on Bro. No I don’t think he did anything THAT drastic, but the book outlined more the conditions that cause kids with mental illness to be ignored for the sake up upholding the community appearance if that makes sense? Sweeping concerning behavior under the rug to not raise concern or point fingers at the parents or adults for failing. I sort of see peach creak as a similar town.

@gettingfrilly wrote this too and much more eloquently I might add but I always thought both Bro and Eddy have undiagnosed ADHD.

I could go on but I’ll stop there for everyone’s sake. I get more into Eddy’s family in the next chapters of Ed is Thicker than Mud (;

Hahahaha no I love Edd being a Shania fan 😂 sometimes headcanons that are a little ooc add to the world building. Dude contains multitudes. I also like to imagine Edd’s taste in music being a strange mix of experimental obscure + borderline cheesy (I was just listening to the OST for Xanadu by Olivia Newton-John/ELO that makes me think of Edd for some reason). But I’ve never thought of connecting the pedal steel guitar in Shania Twain’s music with Edd. Maybe he can serenade Eddy… 😛

Yes! The EdMay wedding is meant to be the last chapter *cough* I mean. The thrilling conclusion. Heh. Though I imagine at least 4 more chapters between where I’ve left off and the end of the fic.

[livingponcho]

My bones and spirit

A Ben Clark fanfic

Ben always had a hunch that he was different than the boys in his class. Music made him feel things, he was shy, he never really had any interest in the idea of being a prince or a being the man, he enjoyed being called pretty, and enjoyed the thought of wearing makeup and dresses (not that he ever did that) When he was young he wanted to look pretty like his mom, to sing like the cool woman and man he listens to on the radio.

As he grew he started to think about it less and less, but still the idea of being a girl never really changed. The problem was that he knew he was a boy, he liked his voice that was soft and slightly deep. He liked being a boy, so maybe he was just slightly more open.

A lot Changed when he lost his voice, everything felt wrong. His face was wrong, he was filled with an anger and emptiness that made everything seem like nothing. He was lost, getting in fights almost every moment of living hoping that maybe he’d feel better. Was he even a man; his voice the soft and the slight deep of it, blue was no longer a thing that made him feel good or safe. The idea of being a man didn’t, at least not completely. Everything felt different, numb.

He had just recently started living with his cousin, Aiden. Sometimes his aunt would leave some her makeup at the house, when they were off on business trips. Gods did he want to be pretty, for someone to look at her and think he was a handsome man and a pretty girl. At the time she didn’t know why he was having thoughts like this. He was trying to be less aggressive, music helped; while looking for something new to add to his playlist she found a song. ‘Rebel rebel -David Bowie’ was not new by any means but it made Ben feel something. Ben saw himself in the song, to be honest she wasn’t sure if he was boy or if she was girl. There was very little that he actually knew, he knew that he fine with being a boy and that he never felt wrong about being a boy, she knew that she liked the idea of being pretty, and wearing makeup and dresses. So maybe he was just gender nonconforming.

It finally clicked when she was messaging Logan about not fitting into the stereotype of a man. They were talking about how it’s honestly stupid that they are expected to be outgoing and to not have emotions. As the conversation went on topics of makeup, clothing came up. Ben mentioned how men never talk about the want to be seen as a woman and to be a pretty girl. when Logan sent her:

Logan: buddy that not a common thing. That sounds like gender envy- (I think I’m using it right one of my club mates told me about it, with their transition and stars being something that gives them gender envy)

Ben: wait what?

Logan: do you commonly wish to be a girl or seen as one?

Ben: I mean yeah, but doesn’t everyone?

Logan: no

Logan: Are you trans? or nonbinary! I’m not the best educated on this but if you are that perfectly fine!!!

Ben: you don’t wish you were a girl?

Logan: nope

Logan: I’m here if you need me :))

Ben: I might need a moment.

Ben sat on his bed thinking, he thought all people just kinda wanted to be a little bit of both. He knew he was a boy. He never felt like he wasn’t a boy but, the more she looked backed she never really felt like she wasn’t a girl. She liked makeup, he liked music, and she liked drawing, and his friends. Was she a girl? Ben felt like he was a little bit of both, he was a boy but also a girl at the same time. In the moment a lot of things made sense but also she had so many questions and felt a little lost. Could she be both? She felt like he was. Turning back over he sees that Logan texted him a link, it was to a website on gender identity and expression. Maybe she didn’t need to know everything, he a was boy the same as she was a girl.

[dyns33]

Flufftober 4 - Only lovers left alive

Adam x Eve x Reader 

           "They came back."

           "The zombies ? I thought they came often, which really pisses you off all the time."

           "No. It's different. It's the little zombies."

Y/N looked up from her book to stare at Adam, who was circling the living room like a cat defending its territory, passing by the window to look through the curtain to see if the intruders had finally left. Eve didn't move, as she hadn't moved when someone rang, continuing to stroke Y/N's hair while humming.

It might sound strange, but since living with ​​vampires Y/N had lost track of time. Her days had turned into nights, the hours seemed to either go by terribly fast, or stand still for an eternity, and so she hadn't realized that Halloween night had arrived.

She could have guessed that it was a night that Adam hated even more than the others. Children, or 'little zombies' as he called them, kept coming asking for candy when they saw that there was some light.

           "They threw eggs." grumbled Adam, pressing his nose against the window. "On the door, and on my car."

           "That's what happens when you don't give them a treat. You get a trick."

           "It's a collector's car, very old, very precious. Next time, I'll open the door and eat one as an example."

           "We don't eat little zombies. Eve, tell him we don't eat little zombies."

           "Listen to our darling, love." she said continuing to play with her hair as if nothing had happened.

           "... Not even a finger ? To stop them from coming ?"

Of course, Adam wasn't really serious. He knew what would happen if he hurt a child. Not only was it wrong, he had never hurt a little zombie, when he was still a zombie himself and after his transformation, but also because even more zombies would disturb their serenity.

They might even have to move. Which he didn't want at all. He hated travelling even more than he hated humans.

Small humans in particular.

For her part, Eve still said nothing. She didn't really like mortals, but they fascinated her sometimes. She always wondered what incredible they were going to invent the next day. But not a word about the children.

           "You... Did you have children ?"

The two vampires turned to her, oblivious to the screams that echoed in the street.

           "I mean, before. Or after. Not in a conventional way of course, I understood that it was not possible, but by transforming them? Or is it prohibited perhaps ? I imagine that it is not a good idea to change a child. You wanted to have some ? You... Want to have some ?"

The couple said nothing, each suddenly looking at the other. Obviously they had never had this discussion, or very quickly, a very long time ago, and they had wanted to forget it.

Y/N then quickly changed the subject, asking if they had ever tried making blood candy. While Adam grimaced and indignantly thought of such horror, Eve remained silent.

Later, when Detroit was totally asleep and the musician was taking advantage of the calm to compose a new song while wearing his headphones, Y/N got up to face Eve.

           "You... You wanted children, didn't you ?"

           "You're funny, darling. Where do you get such an idea ? With Ava, Adam, and now you, I already have a lot of work. But to answer you clearly, no, never."

           "Really ?"

           "Really. However... Adam wanted some. At first."

           "Adam wanted children ?" Y/N whispered loudly, not sure if he could hear them through his headphones.

           "At first, as I just told you. He was devastated to learn that I couldn't biologically have one. Of course, he almost immediately talked about adoption. Then I turned him, he saw the world with my eyes and he gradually changed his mind. I'm not sure he really wanted a child. It was more the idea of ​​creating something with me, and we've created a lot together since."

           "It's still a bit sad."

           "Maybe. But it would also have been a lot of fear and argument. Beings like us avoid getting attached to too many people. It's so easy to lose our loved ones. Not only did he not want a child anymore, but for a long time Adam didn't want to see anyone but me. A real hermit. He only spoke to people if it was necessary, or if they were really exceptional, so very infrequently."

With a big smile, Eve then rubbed her head against Y/N's like a cat, to show her all her affection, and make her understand that she was special.

The three of them now formed a small family. Soon they would transform her, and they would be together forever, even when they weren't together, happy to know they would meet again at some point. .

They didn't need children for that.

           "I still wonder if Adam would have been a good father. I mean, I know he would, but I imagine him being very stressed."

           "Oh, darling, you know him so well." Eve purred, kissing her. "You just have to see how he behaves as soon as you have to leave the house. With a child it would be much worse. And you have to be prepared. When you're like us, he won't let you go anywhere alone for at least a century."

           "You're kidding ?"

           "No, she's not kidding." Adam replied, continuing to play the violin, still wearing his headphones and turning his back to them.

           "You are not my father !"

           "I don't see the connection. Zombies are dangerous, the world is dangerous, I'm only careful."

           "It's just excessive." translated their lover. "Don't worry, I'll be there to calm him down, so you can fly on your own. Even if I'll still be attentive. I don't want anything to happen to you either. "

           "It seems to me that we are all fine only because you are here to make sure of it." half joked Y/N.

This made Adam groan, who seemed to decide that he had composed enough for the night, and that he too deserved a little attention, going to slump between Y/N and Eve, silently asking for caresses and kisses.

They were going to meet his expectations when there was a very loud knock on the door.

           "Trick or Treat !" shouted adults several times, visibly drunk.

           "... I was wrong, big zombies are just as terrible as little zombies." mumbled Adam. "They're there later at night, and they're harder to scare."

           "And they'll piss on your car."

           "... I'll eat one, as a warning !"

Despite his best efforts, Adam couldn't get up, caught by his two lovers who held him down until the intruders left, showering him with all the love they could.

Adam was almost not angry the next day, when he had to wash his precious car with lot of water, the smell was unbearable for him.

[yalexxiii]

cw: brief mentions of contemplating suicide

“eVEryOnE’s A LittLE NeURoDIverGeNT” shut up shut the fuck up

If that was the case then why are neurodivergent people still being ostracized? If everyone is a little neurodivergent as you say, then why is there ableism towards them? By extension, why is there a term used to describe them and only them? The term ‘neurodivergent’ wouldn’t need to exist because everyone would fit under it in some way.

Also, I cannot begin to describe how difficult it has been so far to get diagnosed with adhd (or even getting tested for it). So I started questioning if I was because not only was I looking at symptoms online and thinking “yeah, I have experienced X/felt Y in Z situation,” but also because the majority of my friends (who, mind you, are neurodivergent themselves) have said that I radiate those vibes.

Okay, I could be wrong. My friends could be wrong. I could be misinterpreting a lot of things and remember stuff that didn’t happen.

However, that doesn’t negate the fact that I have been told that same thing 100% of the time I tell someone I think I might have adhd.

I mentioned it to my mom, she said that (granted she might not understand how all this works because she still uses the terms mild and severe while describing autism). I also mentioned it to my doctor and she ALSO said that. And I was like “okay, she specializes in medicine and more physical health than mental, maybe she also just isn’t as educated as I want her to be.”

And I was right, and I know this because she sent my mom a list of counselors/therapists that specialize in the field (supposedly, again I might be remembering wrong).

So I have my first session with my therapist, I’m telling her why I’m here (not only bc of me may or may not having adhd, but also bc i told my doctor and by extent my mother that i might kill myself before I reach thirty). She asks me to describe what symptoms I saw in myself/my friends saw in me and-

Okay is this a me problem or is it next to impossible to describe the exact symptoms? My friends haven’t really described exact symptoms other than one time where they said that listening to one song on loop for hours on end (which is something i do) is a version of stimming. And that moment I felt so stupid that I couldn’t name any off the top of my head but also upset that she kinda expected me to come in, manila folder in hand, of every symptom I saw in myself.

But that honestly wasn’t the part that stuck with me from that session. Because the thing is…

SHE ALSO TOLD ME THAT EVERYONE IS A LITTLE NEURODIVERGENT.

Granted, paraphrasing, but she said it multiple times iirc.

And maybe this is just a case where she wanted to tell me that I was not alone in feeling these things, but also I feel like I’m being dismissed and not being taken seriously repeatedly. At least tell me I could get tested, stop beating around the bush.

And after all that, she told me that I could take the Raads-R test, which, if you don’t know, is an eighty question quiz you can take to see if you show signs of autism (autism, not even adhd like I came in for. But then again if I have one chances are I likely have the other). So obviously, because I came into therapy again to help me get answers to my questions, I take the quiz with my mom so she can help me with parts of the question.

And that’s another thing I don’t like so far about trying to be diagnosed. Every quiz I’ve taken to see if there’s a possibility I’m neurodivergent always has to have the most polar answers ever. It’s always either “I always do this” or “I never do this.” Leaves no room for sometimes and maybes.

The Raads-R test is only different in the case where it also specifies age in its answers (like, it has answers like “I have done this only when I was sixteen/ older than sixteen.” Which I’m not sure how to feel about when I’m fifteen and the quiz was likely made only with adults in mind, but whatever.

So I finish the test and I get a score of 154. Which rounds up to 160, which according to the test, means that there is strong evidence indicating I have autism. I’m not sure if the test is completely accurate, but me scoring that high on a test that a licensed therapist recommended me taking has to mean something.

And me scoring that high on the test only makes me more pissed at people who say that everyone is a little neurodivergent. Because it both invalidates experiences of people who are indeed neurodivergent and, from experience, likely discourages people from getting a diagnosis in the first place.

Sorry for kinda ranting about this, but sometimes shit gets me peeved and I need to gather my thoughts and get negative feelings out of my system. And I’m keeping in mind that I have only seen that therapist once ever. Things could change and I may just be jumping to conclusions. Hell, I could wind up not even being neurodivergent.

But hearing that over and over while I’m trying to have someone take me seriously is so tiring and makes me want to give up on trying. And I can only imagine how tired people WITH diagnoses are with hearing that.

TL;DR: No, not everyone is neurodivergent, and imo saying that is invalidating to what actual neurodivergent people experience. Neurodivergence is a spectrum, but not every living person is on that spectrum.

[voxasks]

🫐 So she/her, female, teenager, always the therapist friend, always wanting to be the best but then lacks the courage to put effort and gets mad when someone else is better than me, generally gets irritated when someone is better at something I was supposed to be good, like IT and coding (but it sometimes irritates the hell out of me with errors and bugs), loves music way too much my headphones are tired of sending the reminder to put volume down but gothic rock and all some gothic love sad songs are too good to not listen, a dark romantic, has too many ideas to do and ends up doing nothing, heavy simps in patterns like; mad/crazy scientist who has been just through traunatic experiences, character older than me and overall questionable just like my liking and heavy kin to Vox, loves pets but gets easily scared, actually feeling more free in expressing myself in english than my native language, stays almost 24/7 on character.ai creating silly stories with my oc and canon characters, doesn't like to go out and meet with people this much but actually wishes that I would have anyone to go out with and do silly things instead of sitting all day in room, wannabe cosplayer but I need to wait for things to arrive and to gather confidence, loves to dye my hair into unnatural colors as I get easily bored with natural ones

“this  time  i’m  getting  the  vibes  of  some  SERIOUS  mommy  issues,  though  i  could  be  wrong,  i’ll  admit  that.  though  i  gotta  say  character.ai  chats  are  hardly  even  in  character,  or  so  i  was  told  by  my  editor.  you’re  scared  of  putting  in  effort  because  you’re  scared  it’ll  be  for  nothing,  that  the  product  will  turn  out  like  the  explosive  shit  you  see  in  dive  bar  bathroom  stalls,  which  also  why  you  hate  being  upstaged.  the  other  few  people  who  commented  this  emoji  have  actually  either  given  me  hermit  vibes  or  have  admitted  to  being  a  hermit  so,  no  surprise  there.  another  similarity  you  share  with  the  others  is  that  you  just  hate  being  perceived  so  you  never  go  out  and  you  dress  up  as  other  people  to  be  perceived  as  that  character  instead.  you  don’t  really  know  what  you’re  doing  with  your  life  or  who  you  really  are  so  you  flip  flop  between  hair  colors  because  if  there’s  no  one  identity  you’re  anchored  to  then  there’s  no  one  appearance  you’ll  be  satisfied  with.  naturally  with  anyone  who  has  ‘unusual’  interests,  such  as  gothic  rock  and  dark  romance,  you’ve  probably  been  casted  out  by  a  lot  of  people  which  further  promotes  the  comfort  of  being  shut  in.” 

“here’s  the  cheese  on  the  cracker;  i  didn’t  get  to  become  one  of  hell’s  biggest  companies  by  being  like  everyone  else.  and  i  also  hate  any  average  fucker  that  dares  to  tell  me  i’m  not  worth  shit  just  because  i  have  a  few  whacky  ideas  for  tech.  but  people  fuck  up.  even  you.  even  when  you  believe  in  your  dreams  like  a  naive  child  and  do  your  best.  but  that  doesn’t  mean  you’ll  fuck  up  every  single  time.  the  more  attempts  you  make,  the  greater  the  amount  of  successes.  you’re  still  alive.  pick  yourself  up  before  it  gets  harder  when  you’re  down  here.”

based off of the 200 follower event.

“🫐 — tell vox about yourself and he’ll tell you his inner thoughts about you.”

[littlewestern]

Hey, Hey, Hey! - On Music in CGI TtTE Movies

Part 1: The Anecdote (Intro)

If there’s one thing that watching Thomas the Tank Engine has taught me, it’s that the most important thing is being friends, especially when you’ve committed to watching a bunch of children’s movies of questionable quality. For this @greatwesternway​ must again be commended not only for getting her hands on all the films, but watching them multiple times (once by herself and then again with me, several times over by this point). That’s friendship!

The first movie I watched (alone) was Blue Mountain Mystery which, If you’ve never seen any of the CGI movies, is a nice one to start with. The pacing is decent, the characterization of the narrow gauge engines is good, and the inclusion of Victor’s backstory is great, bordering on brilliant writing. Really, I only had one complaint… The music.

My god, even now listening to it again as I write this. It’s like at every juncture the people responsible for this song were determined to make the worst possible decisions available to them at the time. The blaring horn in the intro, the cacophonous production, the lyrics that would earn a C+ at best in a 4th grade poetry unit, the children’s choir in the background, this truly has it all. Two minutes of baffling mediocrity in an otherwise pretty decent movie. The other numbers weren’t any better, but Working Together was particularly noteworthy.

The film ended and I told DJ that I’d enjoyed most of it, but that the music was very, very bad, as bad as I’d ever heard in a children’s animated feature (and I’ve watched some garbage animated features).

“The songs in the film were different songs, but they sounded almost identical,” I observed. DJ laughed and agreed, and for the next few weeks we watched better movies with better music in them. Then we got to King Of The Railway.

“This next one has Stephen in it,” DJ promised me.

“Love that guy!” I replied cheerfully. We’d watched his episodes of the show, but I had not yet seen the movie.

“It also has your favorite song in it.”

I laughed. I thought she was joking. After all, I had said that all the bad songs sounded basically the same. And as someone who has been diagnosed with incurable Commitment To The Bit Syndrome, I proceeded to ‘yes-and’ her.

“Oh, great! Can’t wait to start rockin’ and rollin’ and liftin’ and loadin’!”

DJ did not laugh or continue the joke. I was confused, but it happens! I’m not always as funny as I think I am. At least I would get to watch the movie that introduced my favorite Ulfstead Castle engine! And then, sixteen minutes into the film…

“No fucking way,” I said, at first in disbelief and then again in glorious, shrieking delight. “No fucking way!”

“I’m afraid so,” DJ said gravely. At least, I think that’s what she said, because at this point I was inconsolable. I had become unglued. I don’t remember exactly what came out of my mouth, but I know it was unkind. And loud.

“You can’t just– You can’t reuse a song you already used!” I declared, once I’d pulled myself together enough to start forming full sentences again. “You can’t hand in the same homework assignment twice!”

“Sure they can. They have the rights,” said DJ matter-of-factly.

“Well yeah,” I conceded. “But it’s just not The Done Thing. It’s not wrong, but we just don’t do it!”

Since then, the quality of the music in the CGI films has been the subject of much ridicule between the two of us, but to me especially. Sometimes I will narrate what I’m doing to the tune of Working Together. Any five syllable phrase will work, and it doesn’t even need to rhyme!

Open the ipad Lookin’ at files Drinkin’ my coffee!

So why bring this up? Well, a few weeks ago, I and several others in the ttte blogosphere received the entirety of the lyrics to Misty Island Rescue’s theme as an anonymous message. It reminded me that there’s actually a lot to say about the music, how it evolved over the years, and what makes the bad stuff bad and the good stuff good. And, yes, there is good stuff in some of these films.

So let’s make a series of essays about it! Next week, I’d like to take a look at the worst of what these movies have to offer, and break down why they don’t work and what might be done to fix them. After that, we’ll look at the good stuff and talk about how they improved on the formula, and I’ll reveal which song I think is the best out of the 13 CGI films.

‘Til then!

[book-hooked]

Random Sentence Starters

SHORT

“Marry me.”

“Do you want me to leave?”

“You are not going without me.”

“I can’t believe you!”

“I swear it won’t happen again.”

“What did you say?”

“I’m not jealous.”

"You’re jealous, aren’t you?”

“We can’t keep doing this.”

“Are you sure this is legal?”

“Isn’t this amazing?”

“I’m going to take care of you, okay?”

“Stay the night. Please.”

“You can’t die. Please don’t die.”

“Run away with me.”

“You did WHAT?”

“Quit whining.”

“Get outta my sight!”

“Why are you so annoying?”

“Were you ever going to tell me?”

"Never in a million years.”

“Don’t ask me that…”

“I might have had a few shots.”

“What’s with the box?”

“W- What are you doing?”

“Say it!”

“I could kiss you right now!”

“Are you done with that?”

“What’s going on here?”

“Stop pinning this on me! You started it!”

“It’s your fault we’re in this mess.”

“Did you do this on purpose?!”

“Kiss me.”

“Are you still awake..?”

“Excuse you?”

“This is all your fault!”

“I can’t believe you dragged me into this.”

“Don’t give me that look! It wasn’t my fault!”

“I shouldn’t be in love with you!”

“It’s not fair!”

“I could kill you right now!”

“Knock it off!”

“Screw you!”

“You’re a complete moron!”

“I love this song!”

“I can’t be in love with you!”

“Make me.”

“Don’t tempt me.”

“I hate you.”

“You are infuriating!”

“Just shut up already.”

“That doesn’t even make sense.”

“Bite me.”

“Eat me.”

“Kiss my ass.”

“Just admit I’m right.”

“Just admit you’re wrong.”

“You are being ridiculous!”

“That’s irrational.”

“Listen to me!”

“That’s not what I meant and you know it.”

“Don’t yell at me.”

“That’s it. End of discussion.”

“I don’t believe you.”

“You shouldn’t have said that.”

“Fuck you!”

“Shut your mouth before I shut it for you.”

“How dare you?”

“I dare you!” 

“It’s you, it’s always been you.” 

“Well this is awkward…”

“Just pretend to be my date”.  

MISCELLANEOUS

“Are you really gonna leave without asking me the question you’ve been dying to ask me?”

“The planet is fine. The people are fucked.”

“I just did some calculations, and I’ve been able to determine that you’re full of shit.”

“You know what I like most about people? Pets.”

“Do you ever think if people heard our conversations they’d lock us up?”

“What about a compromise? I’ll kill them first, and if it turns out they were friendly, I’ll apologize.”

“I don’t hate you.. I just don’t like that you exist.”

“Love is the jelly to sunshine’s peanut butter. And if I tell you that I’m in sandwich with you, I’m not just saying it to get in your Ziploc bag.”

“Do things that make you happy within the confines of the legal system.”

“Did you really just insult Captain America in front of me?”

“Can I touch your boob?”

“It’s not that you’re wrong, exactly, you’re just extremely not right.”

“You shouldn’t be trusted with small children, should you?”

“Give me cake or give me death.”

“On a scale from, ’I can sometimes make important phone calls without crying’ to ’I have a stable job with a steady income, a spouse who loves me, a dog, and two kids who are screwed up minimally at worst’, how much of an adult are you?”

“You think I’m dumb enough to fall for that stupid move?”

“Despite the cliche, it’s not me, it’s you.”

“Obviously you can’t tell a woman you just met that you love her, but it sucks that you can’t.”

“No, it was my fault for thinking that you might care.”

“When you love someone, you just don’t stop. Ever. Even when people roll their eyes or call you crazy… even then. Specially then!”

“If you’re not scared, then you’re not taking a chance. If you’re not taking a chance, then what the hell are we doing anyway?”

“I think I’ve been holding myself back from falling in love with you all over again.”

“What have I told you about the toilet seat?”

“I tried to change the duvet and I got stuck inside.”

“I vote today to be a pajama day.”

“You have to tell me why were committing a felony before we do it. Not that that’s going to stop us, but at least I’ll have all the facts.”

“I don’t leave messages. If I wanted to talk to a machine, I’d talk to my VCR.”

“I can be flexible. As long as everything is exactly the way I want it, I’m totally flexible.”

“You know we’re suppose to be together. I knew it the first time I saw you, and you know it, too. I know you do.”

“Those things you said yesterday… Did you mean them?”

“I’m not going to apologise for this. Not anymore.”

“What I hear when I’m being yelled at is people caring loudly at me.”

“I am NOT crying, okay?! I’m allergic to jerks!”

“This would not happen if I had a penis!”

“That’s almost exactly the opposite of what I meant.”

“All nighter, you and me. First one to fall sleep buys the other dinner.”

“I don’t think I’ve ever played spin the bottle.”

“Sorry! I didn’t mean to touch your butt.”

“I’m ok, thank you. Just please, stop talking to me.”

“To the night you’ll never remember!”

“Excuse me, did the 12:15 bus come by already?”

“Could I sit here? All the other tables are full.”

“Are you meeting someone here? Because.. I think I’m that person.”

“You weren’t supposed to laugh! I’m so embarrassed!”

“It must be hard with your sense of direction, never being able to find your way to a decent pickup line.”

“Driver picks the music, shotgun shuts his/her cake hole.”

“I’m not gonna die in a hospital where the nurses aren’t even hot.”

“You better take care of that car or I swear I’ll haunt your ass!”

“This is the dumbest thing you’ve ever done.“

“It’s a real shame nobody asked for your opinion.”

“I could do that, but could doesn’t mean would.”

“You cannot fathom the immensity of the fucks I don’t give.”

“You’re like, five feet tall. How you gonna reach me, shortie?”

"I recognize that you have reached a decision, but given that it is a stupid ass decision I have elected to ignore it”

“Do you need me to kill someone for you?”

“Look out where you’re going, asshole!”

“Fuck the sandwich guy!”

“I did not mean for stripping to come out of this.”

“The whole street is blocked off. The police won’t tell us anything, but I think there’s been some kind of attack… Maybe a bomb?”

“Oh my god, are you okay? I’m calling the police. I think I saw who did this to you.”

“I’m weird, you’re weird, we could have weird little babies and live weirdly ever after if it wasn’t for the fact I find you repulsive.”

“There is nothing wrong with planning a wedding with a video game character.”

“I’m gonna lay down and die for like half hour okay?”  

“There’s been some real friction in our friend group lately. I suggest an orgy to save our friendships.”

“It’s midnight, what do you want?”

“I think I know how to use a bed.”

“If I wake up in the morning and I’m dead… Wait.”

“You are completely unfit to handle a child.”

“We have to get out of this place. It is EVIL.”

“Don’t you dare throw that snowba-, goddammit!”

“When in doubt curl into the fetal position and give up on life.”

“It’s not a double date, we’re just third and forth wheeling.”

PREGNANCY

“I have something to tell you…”

“I think I’m pregnant.”

“I’m pregnant!”

“When were you going to tell me that you’re pregnant?”

“You’re smart and successful with an adorable belly.”

“$50 bucks says it’s a girl/boy.”

“Pregnancy suits you…”

“Hello little one. We can’t wait to meet you…”

“I’ll just be in the bathroom throwing my fucking guts up because our unborn kid wants to be a dick!”

“There’s someone I’d like you to meet…”

“Shh… He/she’s sleeping..”

“I have a special surprise for you. Close your eyes and follow me.”

“No, no, no, no, no, we aren’t ready… We aren’t ready for kids yet!”

“Oh, gosh, I felt it! I felt a kick!”

FLUFF

“Your hair is so soft…”

“You’re so cute when you pout like that!”

“Just relax, I’ll wash your hair for you.”

“I’m not going to stop poking you until you give me some attention.”

“What, does that feel good?”

“HA! I found a weak-spot on you, didn’t I?”

“Are you wearing my shirt?”

“You are ridiculously comfortable…”

“I’ve had a rough day and honestly all I want right now is a drink and someone to cuddle with…”

“You’re so cute when you’re half asleep like this…”

“You’re beautiful, you know that?”

“We should get a puppy!”

STARGAZING

“Aren’t they beautiful?”

“These stars are nothing compared to the ones I’ve seen in your eyes.”

“Shooting star, make a wish.”

“It’s actually a comet, but I’ll still make one.”

“Imagine if it could always be this way, even in the city.”

“Never thought something so beautiful could exist in nature…”

“Wouldn’t it be cool to name a star after yourself?”

“Y'know, your roof may not be the safest place for us to stargaze.”

“This is why you made me drive three hours out into the middle of nowhere?”

“Is that a– Wait, no, just an airplane.”

“I wouldn’t mind falling asleep out here.

FLIRTY/SUGGESTIVE/SEXUAL

“Did you just… finish?”

“They always make shower sex sound so appealing, but honestly, this is getting dangerous.”

“I’m not actually feeling anything.”

“Are you getting any closer?”

“Why do they make this look so easy in all those porn movies?! This hurts like fuck!”

“Did something just happen? You’re not turned on anymore.”

“Shit sorry, am I going too fast?”

“Wow, you’re hot.”

“Is that a gun in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?”

“Hey, I’m open minded.”

“Keep sweet-talking and this could go a whole new direction.”

“I think it’s about time we stop avoiding the obvious.”

“I’m gonna be honest with you. I’m really horny, and you’re really hot. Can we fuck? Like, now?”

“I see someone’s happy to see me.”

“I saw that. You just checked me out.”

“You know, when this is over, we should really have angry sex.”

“Take off your clothes.”

“Tell all those other guys/girls you don’t need them ‘cause you got me.”

“Don’t give me that face, it’s so cute I might not be able to hold back.”

“Boobs are really just squishy pillows.”

“If you don’t get turned on by having your neck kissed somethings wrong with you.”

“Blasphemy! Sex solves everything.”

“I platonically want to have sex with you. No big deal.”

TEXTS

[text]: What do you want now?

[text]: Do you want to bet on that?

[text]: Guess who just got back in town.

[text]: So I might be in a hospital right now…

[text]: We can’t keep doing this anymore!

[text]: Come on, come to the party!

[text]: Can you pick me up from the bar? Too drunk to drive.

[text]: You have no clue how I feel so shut up.

[text]: I call bullshit.

[text]: You thought you could get away with that, didn’t you?

[text] I gave up great shower sex to be here so don’t say I never did anything for our friendship.

[text] Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.

[text] Also, my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall.

[text] Who says no to sex and donuts?!

[text] I know what you did last summer…

[irresistiibles]

was that jacob elordi? oh no no, that was just achilles, a canon character from the song of achilles. they are twenty four years old, use he/him, and are not aware that they are not actually from washington dc. too bad they can’t stray from this city for long.

how long has your character been here

like a month but he thinks it’s been around six years

what is your character’s job

he’s a college athlete, got a full ride on a sports scholarship even though he did not need the money. he probably plays lacrosse like a real jackass

where has your character been pulled from in their fandom

sometime after the death of patroclus’. i have not decided if this means very recently after or after achilles’ death as well when he’s waiting for him in the underworld, i’ll figure that out before he’s made aware. regardless he has to be unaware at least until he has some friends here because otherwise no one deserves to deal with a post-patroclus achilles.

has any magic affected your character

the loss of his memories is all!

any other info!

listen i love him but achilles sucks a little. like, don’t get me wrong, he could have been much worse, but man is he a piece of work

he benefits so much from the book being told in patroclus’ perspective it absolutely softens the guy

not that he’s inherently bad or anything!! i definitely think he has good intentions and means well but at the same time he’s a brat who does need to be reminded to do the right thing now and again. it’s not something that’s just instinctual to him

charismatic and he knows it. likes being the center of attention, likes being the best. he has always had this need to be someone important

and he can be an absolute man-child at times. boy can he be prideful and know how to throw a fit

bad at feigning interest in things and people

but he still tends to be well loved. achilles has always been the golden child, both in story and in his fake memories.

a star athlete from a young age, achilles never really had any doubts about how his life would go

and he’s doing well with that, he just sometimes feels a little empty in it, like he doesn’t know how to be anyone but this perfect guy

man is not grounded at all is what i’m saying

mommy issues but he doesn't really realize it

as much as i bash him unaware achilles who doesn't remember war can often be nice and well meaning if you can get past the fact that he's absolutely self-absorbed

comes from a rich family with a politician dad and a mom who is bitter than their dad is never in their life even though they’ve been well off forever.

she’s the overbearing type, constantly trying to get achilles to fit her perfect image

plot ideas

fellow students! especially athletes but truly could be anyone

a tutor or study group. he definitely skips half of his classes and needs help to get good enough grades to keep the sports scholarship going

dates that ended poorly. could be a man or a woman i just know it didn't go well because like i said his interest in other people are so low. he tries dating cause it fits his image he is just an absolutely terrible date

people he doesn't get along with. generally achilles is well-liked he cares about his reputation enough to try to be charming a decent amount of the time but there are plenty of reasons not to like him

gym friends

drinking friends even though i think he's an absolute menace while drunk

on that note someone he's gotten into a bar fight with

some friends? as much as he's capable of that? he has been here four years surely there's someone he gets along with. he tends to vibe better with people who do not match his energy or pride people a little more chill have a better chance at eventually getting through to him

i can come up with more on how he'd vibe with people as i add him to my doc