#I love hymm

[imagionary]

Dave is like an eldrich demon spider abomination to me and I love him

[just-an-enby-lemon]

Gabriel: For the crime of betraying heaven and dating a demon...

Aziraphale: Uh. I'm not dating Crowley

Gabriel: Lying is only going to make the situation worse. We have evidence!

Sandalphom: *shows photos of Crowley and Aziraphale lunch dates and holding hands at the park*

Aziraphale: That's just things we do as friends.

Micael: Mayhaps, but aren't you two a queerplatonic couple?

Aziraphale: A what?

Gabriel: *trying to not show he also has no idea what a queerplatonic couple is* hahahaha you're telling the truth.

Aziraphale: Why is this funny?

Micael: Let me get this right. You followed every single dating procedure to the point is punishable. Not only that but you betrayed us for your demon's sake-

Aziraphale: It was also for Earth's sake. I mean of course a part of it was for Crowley and our friendship but also stopping Earth for ending being the endgoal shows that saving the plane and it's inhabitants was a major player on my decision. Clearly?

Micael: *ignoring him* You did all that... and you're not even dating the demon?

Aziraphale:.. yes

Gabriel: *still laughting* Only you, sunshine, only you. Failing to date the demon you're getting punished for dating.

Micael: You know what I think we should send you back... see if you at least suceeds at dating the demon and them we punish you.

Sandalphom: *that really wanted to see a punishement happenig* What? Gabriel say something.

Gabriel: That's... genial, Micael.

Aziraphale: *confused but hey is a free pass* Is it? I mean it is!

Sandalphom: Why? Isn't it better that he didn't date the demon?

Gabriel: It's embarassing. What type of angel fails at a simple task like that? He likes the demon, the demon likes him at least say it to each other for heaven's sake! We trained him better.

Micael: Yeah. That's too much of a loser behavior, I don't want to make an example out of a loser. I'm here to punish a traitor.

Gabriel: You heard the lady, Aziraphale, chop chop, go date your demon so we can punish you for dating the demon.

[back at the shop]

Crowley: Angel! You're back! I was very worried. Had a cool plan to infiltrate upstairs and all.

Aziraphale: *shaking his head foundly* Of course you did, dear boy.

Crowley: Pray tell, how did you escape the archangels?

Aziraphale: *red as a tomato* I don't wanna talk about it.

-//-

[[Bônus ]]

Aziraphale: *reading about queerplatonic relationships* Crowley! Crowley! Look at that, my dear, I think we have one of those.

Crowley: *reads the page Azi is showing him* Yeah. It checks out.

*nothing about their relationship changes at all*

[[[At heaven]]]

Sandalphom: Micael, Micael, we finally can punish Aziraphale.

Micael: Are you sure? They have exactally the same dinamic they did and they weren't dating then.

Sandalphom: I think I heard they say they had a queerplatonic relationship to that wich girl once.

Micael: Did you check with Gabriel?

Sandaphom: He is watching The Sound of Music.

Micael: Oh Lord! You think it will last ten years again?

Sandalphom: I hope not. I still have Do-Re-Mi flasbacks.

[denzartriste]

I think the reason i don't like most modern or even old-but-still-modern-in-the-grand-scheme-of-things retellings of Persephone and Hades is because most paint Demeter as the bad guy.

The original myth (Homeric Hymn to Demeter) was very clear that, in all this, Zeus was the bad guy. When saying how Gaia was luring Persephone, the next sentence is "All according to the plans of Zeus." (My translation for the myth is this btw, i feel that's important to say because translations can be finicky--which I'm also gonna get to.)

I also think its important to say how the kidnapping happened, so I'm gonna paste it (from the translation I'm reading) :

"And the earth, full of roads leading every which way, opened up under her.

It happened on the Plain of Nysa. There it was that the Lord who receives many guests made his lunge.

He was riding on a chariot drawn by immortal horses. The son of Kronos. The one known by many names.

He seized her against her will, put her on his golden chariot,

And drove away as she wept."

It's a kidnapping, its messed up, but i also want to point out how it isnt a violent assault or rape like many people think it is--either is bad, but one is a deliberate lie meant to make us view Hades much worse and a lie i think actively takes away from this story.

Side tangent, real quick. Hades is the god of the underworld, and so we instinctively think "Oh, yeah, like the devil. He's like the greek Satan." because we think underworld=hell=Satan=hades=hades is bad then. Hades isnt good, because none of the greek gods are good, because these gods arent good and we think they are because christianity, the religion most people are taught about before they can develop their own opinions, tells us that gods are good.

My point there is redundant and repetitive, but its important for this. People think Hades is bad, and when they learn there are gods worse than him (Zeus, mostly they just learn about Zeus) they assume that that means Hades ISNT bad, because people want a good guy to root for and Hades seems like an underdog that never did anything wrong. It's also a common myth (myth as is false and not true, not myth as in greek myth) that in the actual original story Persephone just walks into the underworld/Hades doesn't kidnap her. That's not true, it comes from a 1978 story titled "Lost Goddesses of Early Greece: A Collection of Pre-Hellienic Myths" by Charlene Spretnak to make greek mythology more palable to her young daughter, the changes to all the story was just to do that--and then that led to a whole domino effect of people believing the unsourced thing. Im not gonna stand here and say that hades isnt one of the better gods morally speaking, but i am gonna stand here and say that the competition doesn't pose a high bar and people are not seeing enough nuance in him. Also him being better morally is because he doesnt have many stories--even regarding the myth with him and Persephone he isnt that important past the kidnapping. Fun fact, Persephone actually existed before Hades did. So i think that should be kept in mind when putting Hades on a pedestal, he doesn't have as much material to be bad in, so we see him as not as bad.

People are allowed to view Hades are this good guy or an evil devil, whatever, i will be a bit upset about it but people have the right to have opinions--but people also cant pretend those opinions are educated and well sourced. That's were i get actually upset and think its not just a matter of opinion but it turns into just misinformation.

Tangent over, back to the point.

Demeter hears her daughter and "She sped off like a bird, soaring over land and sea, looking and looking." 

She spends a total of nine days wandering all over the earth looking for information on what happened to her daughter, and i just want to mention that as Persephone is being taken she does think about her Demeter, and she has hope to see her again. (line 35 in the myth)

On the tenth day Hecate comes to Demeter and tells her that she heard the abduction, but didn't see who did it. Both of them go off to Helios and ask him which mortal or god did this.

And here again the myth places blame on Zeus, Helios tells Demeter:

"You shall know the answer, for I greatly respect you and feel sorry for you as you grieve over your child, the one with the delicate ankles. No one else among all the immortals is responsible [aitios] except the cloud-gatherer Zeus himself, who gave her to Hādēs as his beautiful wife."

(I think Hades should get slack for this aswell, he was the one who took her and all that. I want to be clear that i dont personally agree 100 precent with how little blame Hades gets in the myth.)

There's also mention about how Demeter is grieving for her child, Persephone, which is quite obvious--this story is about Demeter and Persephone so much more than it is about Hades and Persephone.

Here im mainly recaping the myth as im reading through it, and its long because the myth is kinda long but i dont feel as if i have much to say about it past the occasional thing here and there until we see persephone again, so ill make the text bold and big to the important part again if you want to skip.

So then Helios is basically like Well y'know you could have a worst guy for your kid to marry, Hades is fine all in all surely :D and then leaves

Demeter than shuns the company of the gods in her grief and anger, visiting mortal cities for a long time.

She's sad again, and im sure theres more about this i could say but right now i have a headache give me grace.

Demeter is approached by four sister (they are unaware she is Demeter because she looks like an old woman right now) and say: "“Who are you, and where are you from, old woman, old among old humans?

Why has your path taken you far away from the polis? Why have you not drawn near to the palace?

There, throughout the shaded chambers, are women

who are as old as you are, and younger ones too,

who would welcome you in word and in deed.”"

Demeter wishes them "kharis" which means ‘I wish you pleasure and happiness from our relationship, starting now’, and tells them her name is "Dōsō", the name suggest someone is a 'giver of gifts'. She says she was given her name by her mother. Demeter says she was taken by pirates (much like how her Persephone was taken by Hades, Demeter is grieving still.) and that she "fled her arrogant captors". (I think this is a clear parellel to what happened to Persephone, and how Demeter wishes she could also 'flee her captor'.)

She then says: "what I want is for you to name for me a house to go to, the house of someone, man or woman, who has phila children to be taken care of.10" The little 10 there is a footnote, the footnote being: "The textual transmission is garbled here, and my translation of this line is tentative"

Next part is long, im tired, it has a lot of footnotes and one is really long and i love footnotes but i also dont wanna read a huge paragraph of them. Theres mention of so many rituals i dont really understand. I am tired, forgive me.

A lot of footnotes, i love footnotes but im going to cry if there is another footnote.

Okay okay, im done being dramatic, but i dont want to spend time deep diving so the basic of what happens next is Demeter tries to make this baby shes taking care of immortal, (surely theres something to unpack there) but she fails because someone sees her burning this baby in fire and obvious they dont assume Ah, this is demeter helping my baby. No. They assume, This crazy woman is burning my baby my baby is on fire my baby is going to die And in some myths demeter leaves the baby in the fire and kills it after that, in the one im reading she doesnt do that and just puts it on the floor. Baby dies either way because she makes a promise on the river of styx that the baby's gonna die eventually and she says a lot and there are a lot of footnotes. Theres a bit more to it, she tells them to build a temple i think to appease her? Listen this post has gotten so long im not gonna say more than i need for this im bad at reading sometimes.

Important part again here!

Demeter then makes the world pretty unlivable, enternal winter basically--people are hungry, dying, whole thing. Zeus notices because hes not getting sacrafices of meat anymore, so hes like this is bad and sends out Iris. Demeter doesnt budge because she wants Persephone back, and they arent giving her persephone back.

Then: "the Father sent out all the other blessed and immortal gods. They came one by one,

they kept calling out to her, offering many beautiful gifts, all sorts of tīmai that she could choose for herself if she joined the company of the immortal gods.

But no one could persuade her in her thinking or in her intention [noēma], angry as she was in her thūmos, and she harshly said no to their words.

She said that she would never go to fragrant Olympus, that she would never send up the harvest of the earth, until she saw with her own eyes her daughter,"

After that unsuccesful thing Zeus sends Hermes "so that he may persuade Hādēs, with gentle words, that he allow holy Persephone to leave the misty realms of darkness

and be brought up to the light in order to join the daimones [the gods in Olympus], so that her mother may

see her with her own eyes and then let go of her anger."

So basically Zeus told Hades it was all cool if he kidnapped Persephone and now they're all in the finding out stage of fuck around.

We see Persephone and Hades for the first time since the adbuction, and Persephone is still very much missing her mother--she is sad, she is not happy, and she is still that way after very a long time (The time Demeter spent with humans is described to be "a long time" and the time in which Demeter has been causing hunger/death, not letting humans farm basically, went on for a year before Zeus paid mind to it.)

After hearing what Hermes has to say Hades, with whats basically described as a 'knowing' smile, tells Persephone to go to her mother, and Persephone is really happy about that. Obviously.

Here's the part where Hades gives Persephone the pomegranate seeds. Heres the quote so i dont have to vaguely recap: "But he [Hādēs] gave her, stealthily, the honey-sweet berry of the pomegranate to eat, peering around him. He did not want her to stay for all time over there, at the side of her honorable mother, the one with the dark robe."

Persephone doesnt willingly take the pomegranate seeds herself, thats something i have to say because sometimes people think she did when she didnt. Persephone isnt given a choice in this, she has to stay for one third of the year with Hades.

Sidenote--this hymm was only preserved on one thing, no original copies, and seemingly the part that explains why Hades giving her those seeds binds to the underworld for a third of the year (in some stories its a diffrent fraction, but the point stays the same.) is teared. And this is like one of the worst parts to not have but i digress. Cons of mythology is that its old and we rarely have the full stories on anything perfectly preserved.

Persephone says to her mom that Hades: "put into my hand the berry of the pomegranate, that honey-sweet food, and he compelled me by biē to eat of it."

I didnt know what biē meant but it seemed important to context so i looked it up and it means "Force/Violence." So, again, hades forced her to eat the seeds--But also i still dont know too much what i means because Hades was described as giving her the seeds stealthily, so i dont know why that would be there if he would fully just force her to eat them? But maybe force could also mean that he forced her to stay in the underworld for a third of the year, i dont know.

Persephone also was with friends when she was lured away and taken, she spents multiple lines saying the names of all of them, and a lot of retellings ignore the fact she has friends or a life outside of this thing that happened to her which is why i wanted to point it out. Retellings of this story typically put themselves on a pedastal compared to the original myth despite the fact they strip Persephone of her entire self that doesnt have to do with Hades.

I think its honestly purely misogyny, they also love to infantilize her, which is weird. From what i can tell the only times in the myth Persephone is referred to as a child is when Demeter is referred to as a mother. Persephone is Demeter's child, so when its relevant they say it. We dont know how old Persephone was when she was kidnapped because it doesnt say how old she is. Because honestly her age isnt that important--yeah, sure, i'd like to know what it is, but only because it would be further information. Gods are usually just old to a point it doesnt matter unless it's specified.

The whole point of this started with me wanting to focus more on Demeter and Persephone so im gonna get back to focusing on them and how retellings treat their relationship.

Retellings ignore any positive aspect of their relationship, which is stupid. They portray the two as clashing, despite the fact that they are describes as like-minded. It feels like cheap forced drama and like they want an easy villain. The actual bad guy in the story is mostly Zeus(and Hades in my opinion, but that's suprisingly more nuanced.) but if retellings make Zeus the bad guy, then they have to say why hes the bad guy. He's the bad guy because he told Hades he could kidnap persephone, but retelling dont like mentioning anything Hades can do thats wrong so obviously that cant happen, right? So making Demeter a villain surves multiple purposes. It takes away blame/complexity to Hades's actions, and in the same breath makes them moral. If Persephone's mom is sooo awful then clearly Hades saved her! Obviously he's good, obviously he's just misunderstood, the kidnapping isnt even a kidnapping if you think about it!!! Demeter being this awful unreadable mother in retellings only serves to make Hades more 'good' and, while you'd assume it adds some depth to persephone it just doesnt. Retellings never make her conflicted in a way that matters, it never makes her miss her mom or her friends--because she doesnt have friends in retellings.

Hades and Persephone's story is complex. It's nuanced in a way i cant even begin to dissect--Arguably they are one of the better relationship between gods, if not one of the best period. They have stories past the Homeric Hymm of Demeter--They have stories past the abduction.

And there's no point in butchering a story when there are myths in greek mythology that are forbidden romance + overbearing mother. If thats something you want, Eros and Psyche are right there. I havent read the myth myself, and my knowledge of them is second hand, but if you want an antagonist mother who doesn't like their relationship look no further. Ancient greece wasnt good to woman, i bet there are more stories with evil moms. Search for them. Leave Demeter out of this, and for the love of all thing stop spreading lies about this myth. There is genuinly no Pre-Homeric versions of it. Stop.

Anyways yeah this is long, have a nice day anyone who read all this. Also this is a good source for the myth and Persephone as a whole if you want to know more

[bluebellhairpin]

Thanks to someone this is gonna on blast all day now

[corundumb]

what I've mainly been listening to when drawing The Raven's Hymn written by @wolveria

[patroclusdefencesquad]

not to go on about not yet/love run again but can you believe the lyrics "let foul men band and heed your hum for that ancient hymm you heard me strumming? is nought but fumble-falls and guns and tumbleweeds, love run. it's nought that rum won't solve though some would harm you none - not one - no none would raise to you a hand or thumb, not while by you i stand and hum" and "everyone knows sex is better when you're unemployed" ARE THE SAME FUCKING SONG

[vidavalor]

Muriel and My Fair Lady

We've been talking a bit about The Maltese Falcon and North by Northwest and other film homages in the series and how what a bunch of them have in common is unique use of language-- verbal and visual-- to tell their story. There's another musical/film that I think S2 is referencing a bit that is all about language and that is My Fair Lady.

The romance in My Fair Lady is terrible-- I hope we all can agree on that in our modern era lol-- but that's not really the main aspect of the story that is being referenced in GO, I don't think. My Fair Lady is full of language jokes, including the titles of two of the songs-- "A Hymm to Him", which plays with homophony, and "The Ascot Gavotte", which is about the horse race setting of that part of the story-- The Ascots-- but is, additionally, a joke on the fact that an ascot is also a term for one kind of a secret language. It's also the only real gavotte in a famous musical and we know that's Aziraphale's favorite kind of dance. Much of the story of the film also leads towards a ball at an embassy-- though one that goes a bit better than S2's disaster of a party.

In S2, Crowley and Aziraphale are kind of a more likable version of Higgins and Pickering as Muriel becomes a bit of an Eliza Doolittle. I think the "cupperty" scene is something of a nod to the scene in which Higgins tries to get Eliza to pronounce "cup of tea" differently in My Fair Lady.

Additionally, later in the season, Muriel wants to try breakfast and gets rebuffed, which is kind of like how Higgins and Pickering don't think to give Eliza some of their afternoon tea. Eliza ends up looking at the tea, which is actually Muriel's preference when they first arrive in S2.

My Fair Lady is about a phonetics professor who places a bet with his friend as to whether or not he can change the speech patterns of a Cockney-accented woman enough to pass her off as a duchess at an embassy ball. It's overflowing with linguistics jokes. Eliza agrees to try to undergo this change because she has her own aspiration-- she wants to work in a flower shop.

At the start of the film, she is homeless and selling flowers on the street. She lacks the social refinement necessary to be hired as a shopkeeper-- kind of like how Muriel is on the outside looking in on the Whickber Street shops in S2. Being able to work in a flower shop would give her a new lease on life and when Muriel is in the street on the night of The Meeting Ball, look at the flower market lit up behind them when a kinder and far more likable version of Professor Higgins-- the wordplay-happy Crowley-- approaches:

Unlike Eliza, who wished to sell flowers, Muriel loves books and, at the end of S2, Muriel is the one who winds up running the bookshop... which is a far better ending than Eliza Doolittle gets in My Fair Lady, if you ask me. (She should have gotten a job and married Freddy, dammit. Bonus points to Good Omens as well for recognizing that the real ship in My Fair Lady is Higgins & Pickering.)

Poor Crowley's also kind of a version of Freddy in S2, just with the romance not being with Muriel but the Muriel-paralleling Aziraphale. Madly in love and thrown over at the end for a grumpy old man-- despite being a total dish, a total gentleman, and having the best song in the film. (Not really in the long run but, ya know, kinda lol.) There's even a version of Freddy's gorgeous song by Crowley's favorite, Nat King Cole.

Can you hear a lark in any other part of town? Does enchantment pour out of every door? No, it's just on the street where you live...

[someforzari]

Helping Hand

Virgin!Soobin x fem!reader

Genre: smut, fluff towards the end.

Warnings: hand job, begging, soft dom reader, riding, oral (m receiving), boob play, aftercare, consent being asked (that's sexy), unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it), pet names (sweetheart, good boy etc.), kinda exhibitionism (yeonjun is on call with soobin but soobin is muted, its only mentioned in one scene), praise.

12:24 pm

Soobin loved you. But being a timid and nervous boy, he never confessed his love for you. That meant being your friend and everything but secretly hoping that you would magically notice his feelings for you and tell him you feel the same. (Me too soobin)

Soobin had never slept with anyone and never really cared for it, he felt like it was overrated and probably didn't feel that good anyway but even he had needs. Muting himself on call to Yeonjun to rub one off because the thought of you crept into his mind whilst discussing the college group assignment wasnt the best idea, but who can blame him when you're so pretty. Pumping his hand up and down desperately on his cock to feel some kind of relief just wasn't working anymore. Soobin knew that it wouldn't work forever but he had hoped it would work this time seeing as he needed to hurry and answer Yeonjun. Feeling sexually frustrated, he didn't even hear the door to his apartment open as you strode in wanting to surprise Soobin with a fresh cake from his favourite bakery. Walking to his room, assuming he was in there because of loud shuffling and moans. Wait...

Realising you were listening to something you shouldn't be hearing, you quickly tried to walk away but your feet were stuck as you listened carefully.

"Ah~ please... _____!" He groaned sharply.

You froze as your face reddened and you felt a pool form at your pants. He was jerking off to you...

You should be disgusted. How dare he be such a pervert and jerk off to the thought of you. But you weren't disgusted, no, you were horny. So, you opened the door without warning, causing Soobin to yelp and hurry to cover himself.

"_____! What- What are you doing here?" He then noticed your stare, "I- I swear it's not what it looks like."

"Soobin..." You cooed "Let me help you"

You knelt over his lap and gently moved his hands away, Soobin felt like if he so much as blinked, you would've faded away like a hallucination. He was big. You gulped anxiously wondering if you could even take him. First, you had to make sure he wanted this too.

"Soobin, do you want to do this?" You asked looking at him.

He began nodding his head like a mad man. But it wasn't enough for you.

"Words, baby"

His breath hitched at the nickname and he gulped to extinguish his dry throat.

"Yes, but," You raised an eyebrow attentively "uhm, I've never, you- you know."

"Thats okay, pretty boy, ill teach you~"

He would've responded but your hand grabbed his crying dick from resting on his stomach to between your palms. Licking a long stripe up his length and placing his pink tip on your tongue made him writhe above you and moan your name out like a hymm.

Slowly, sliding down his cock, you could feel him poking the back of your throat. Realising that you won't be able to fit him all today, you took him out and started pumping him too fast for his brain to comprehend, cumming on your face in fat loads. After the initial shock of the orgasm, he looked at you scooping his cum with your fingers and eating it. Soobin felt like he might cum again.

"What do you want to do now, sweetheart?" You said sitting on his lap and combing his sweaty hair.

"I- Fuck me please"

You felt like teasing him right now, " What was that honey?"

"_____, please fuck me"

"Have you been a good boy?" You pouted at him.

"Yes. Yes I've been your good boy, please."

"My good boy" You mumbled quietly.

He felt like he might cry until you lifted yourself off his lap and removed your clothes, completely nude in front of him. Soobin doesn't know where to look, but he decides to follow you and take his clothes off too. God, he was so hot, you wondered why you hadn't made a move sooner. After he relaxed in his chair, you sat on his lap again and positioned your entrance above his tip and glided to collect some slick. After a few seconds, you slowly went lower and lower until he was bottomed out in you.

Soobin felt like he could die between your legs and he'd die happily. Maybe sex wasn't so overrated after all. Soon, he started whining for you to "please move" and that "he's been such a good boy". Of course, you obliged and rocked yourself back and forth on his dick preparing yourself to snap in half. You stopped briefly to breathe and then you bounced up and down on his cock. He was in your guts and you swear you could feel him in your throat. Soobin was no better, moaning and swearing, keeping his arms on the armrest, not knowing where to put them. Without saying a word, you grabbed his hand and put it on your boobs.

"So soft~" He mumbled between moans.

Squishing and pulling on the nipple, he built up enough courage to latch his mouth onto one, the sensation causing you to cum around him. The feeling of you squeezing the life out of his cock made him need to cum desperately.

"W-where do I-" He hiccuped.

"Inside"

That was all he needed to release thick coats of cum into you. The orgasm died down soon and you both sat in silence, panting. You had your face in his neck and he was hugging your waist close to his body.

"I love you, _____," He said hoping for your confession back.

Silence, he was worried he had freaked you out but judging from the way you were holding him, you couldn't have been. He checks your face, and you've fallen asleep. He chuckles and carries you to the bathroom where he puts you into the tub and fills it with warm water. It was alright, he didn't need a response. Not right now anyway.

A/N: first smut writing, how'd I do? As always lmk if I should make a part 2 where reader confesses her love and if it should be smut or fluff or both. Thank you for the support on my Niki work. 🤍🤍

[toontastictoons]

Hi Ace hiiii!

Sorry to just hop by unannounced, i dont need repairs but just really need to tell someone random things right now

So anyway,

They sat on whatever desk might be nearby even if there was no desk there is now somehow

I started mixing my own drinks back home and i dont even know half the stuff i own, i dont remember what they are after a while, this is why i started mixing things together to figure out what they are, anyway last thing i made? Weird! So weird. Good but weird, should try it again sometime.

Ive also got the low ballers every now and then and boy howdy they're something! They're a handful but i love em to bits! Lowie really loves getting into the glitter while Baller enjoys playing around with my kandi beads, i feel like they'd love rave music, and they do! Might get that from me.

Have you seen High rollers show yet? My cogs my son is beautiful! And lemme tell you this, shes got one hell of a show! Ouh i love that silly platypus! Although i guess im more of the step parent? Buck and dave are the proper parents in this situation, im just the one dating both of them oops.

Have you met dave yet? I love that cog with my entire being. He's so nice to me, i keep every trinket in a drawer in my desk and every rose they get me in a jar also in my desk. Ouh.. I could go on and on about hymm but I've probably chewed your ear off enough, sorry about that sweetheart

I'll let ya get back to it, thanks for letting me just kinda.... Babble on

(@ask-toonie-cogsworth)

Toonie?

* A short snort of laughter escapes the repair tech as the cog comes in, and they run a few quick, simple tests on her anyways to be sure everything is in order. They don't want them wandering around vulnerable to Toon Attacks*

How much did you have to drink?

* they sound fond, yet somehow scolding as well. The smallest of smiles cracks their lips as they listen, nodding occasionally*

You should probably be careful with those drinks. Don't want any toons getting the jump on you. I haven't had the chance to stop by High Roller's show yet... Too much repair work to do.. but maybe soon. Buck keeps saying he's going to "thneak" me in at some point. I'm not sure how he's planning to do that. Maybe I'll end up back stage...

* Technically.. a blue fox toon called Ace Tinkertoon could participate... But Ace isn't sure if Toonie knows about that yet.. so they don't bring it up.. *

- 🔧

@ask-toonie-cogsworth

[narcissistcookbook]

From the poll you did, I learned that I'm in the minority in my love for HYMM

So my question is, can you tell everyone to go listen to it like 50 and then do the poll agian because everyone is so wrong?

(I really like This Is How We Get Better btw)

i knew most people would bounce off hymn when i released it, it's okay 💜 but i wasn't prepared for TIHWGB to blow up like it did. it's scary. please don't get used to liking what i make, people - soon i will return to my natural state of Things Most People Don't Like Very Much And Which A Very Small Number Of People Like Entirely Too Much

[josephseedismyfather]

5 songs, 3 outfits

Many thanks to @carlosoliveiraa, @g0dspeeed, @socially-awkward-skeleton, @inafieldofdaisies, @the-silver-chronicles, @noodlecupcakes and @la-grosse-patate, for tagging me in this!🥰 It was really fun! Sorry for the delay, I know it's a reallllly old tag!

Rules: Post 5 songs associated with your OC(s), followed by 3 outfits they would wear.

Harley Jane ❤️

Anyone - Demi Lovato I feel stupid when I pray Why the fuck am I praying anyway? If nobody's listening

Gasoline - Halsey I think there's a flaw in my code These voices won't leave me alone Well, my heart is gold and my hands are cold

I Like It Rough - Lady Gaga Is it 'cause you don't mean it, or because I don't feel it unless it's rough?

FU In My Head - Cloudy June Take me closer, take my clothes off, oh I fantasize If I'm honest, it's more fun when you can't read my mind

Sappy - Nirvana And if you fool yourself You will make him happy

Evangeline Rose 💛

From The Dining Table - Harry Styles I see it's written, it's all over his face Comfortable silence is so overrated Why won't you ever say what you want to say? Even my phone misses your call, by the way

Hymm For The Weekend - Coldplay When I was down, when I was hurt You came to lift me up When I was a river, dried up You came to rain a flood

Hands Clean - Alanis Morissette Ooh, this could be messy but But you don't seem to mind and Ooh, don't go telling everybody And overlook this supposed crime We'll fast forward to a few years later And no one knows except the both of us And I have honored your request for silence And you've washed your hands clean of this

Prodigal - One Republic I'm on the road to who knows where? Look ahead, not behind, I keep saying There's no place to go where you're not there On your rope, I hold tight, but it's fraying

Selling Faith - Matchbox Twenty And I know I ain't been righteous But there ain't nowhere to turn I'm falling, but I don't know how far down I don't need to understand it I just need a guiding light

Austin Randal 💙

Here I Go Again - Whitesnake Though I keep searching for an answer I never seem to find what I'm looking for

I Go To Extremes - Billy Joel Sometimes I lie awake, night after night Coming apart at the seams Eager to please, ready to fight

Sin - Nine Inch Nails It comes down to this, your kiss, your fist, and your strain It gets under my skin, within, take in the extent of my sin

Painkiller - Judas Priest Mankind's on its knees A savior comes from out the skies In answer to their pleas

Wasted Time - Skid Row Paranoid delusions, they haunt you Where's my friend I used to know? He's all alone, he's buried deep within A carcass searching for a soul Can you feel me inside your heart as it's bleeding? Why can't you believe you can be loved?

Even though it's old, gonna send it out. Apologies for doubles and no pressure as always! @wrathfulrook, @trench-rot, @ladyoriza, @cassietrn, @redreart, @hotmessteaparty, @v0idbuggy, @insanityofvaas, @malefiquinn, @strangefable, @chazz-anova, @aristomal, @ocdemon-747, @omen-speaker and anybody else who wants to play. Tag me! 😘

Be added/removed from the tag list here.

[mermaidfanficlibrary]

The song list is here... Its 70 songd and maybe more oh god please help

King and Lioneart- omam

Eyes wide open - goyte

Little lion man - omam

Parents - yungblood

I wont - AJR

Lend me your voice- Belle

Gales of song- Belle

Sho’s song- Cecile Crobel

Haunted- Laura Les

Evil- Melanie Martinez

Nymphology- Melanie Martinez

Blow my brains out - Tikkle me

Hello kitty- Jazmin Bean

Degrade me- TX2

Sex sells- TX2

Gossip- Maneskin

bitch boy- The Oozes

Vagabond- Ghostymane

A million miles away- Belle

I dont fucking hate you- Ghostymane

void- Melanie Martinez

death- Melanie Martinez

Faerie soiree- Melanie Martinez

Milk of the siren- Melanie Martinez

Touchy feely fool- AJR

Way less sad- AJR

Yes I’m a mess- AJR

Steves going to london- AJR

3 oclock things- AJR

The dj is crying for help- AJR

The dumb song- AJR

Don’t throw out my legos- AJR

Brutus- The buttress

I was never yours- Banshee

Panic attack- Pussy riot

Pomegrante lips- Derivakat

Heaven was full- TX2

Content- Bo Burnham

Numb little bug- Em Beihold

Bruno is orange- Hop along

Alien blues- Vundabar

My R- Lollia

I threw glass in my friends eye and now im on probation

Into the open air

Save me-Goyte

Easy way out- Goyte

We sink- Chvrches

Mother we share- Chvrches

Lofticries- Purity ring

Fineshrine- Purity ring

Back in the 90s- Group love

1985- Bo burnham

Graffiti- Chvrches

Never say die-Chvrches

heaven/hell-Chvrches

Clearest blue-Chvrches

Gun- Chvrches

recover- Chvrches

Raindrops

Liar- Arcadian wild

Heartsigh- Purity ring

Sea castle- Purity ring

Dust Hymm- Purity ring

Stranger than earth- Purity ring

Goodbye my friend

ungirthed- Purity ring

Smoke and mirrors- Goyte

Are you satisfied- Marina

Girls- Marina

Saint bernard-

I will always think of you- Bojack hosreman

[summertimemusician]

Linktober Shadow Day 6

Shadow Beast

The Twilight Princess fan in me really came out on this one huh? I blame the sleep deprivation. We never quite addressed the effects of the Twili Magic on Twilight and how it's only sheer force of will and the fact he's so darn kind, Midna's influence and Time teaching him the Song of Healing first being the main factor in making sure he doesn't fall huh? Even more so than the One Cutscene. We also need to talk more about the fact we technically kill Midna's people and how by the end of it all Twi is so changed by the Twilight Realm who's it's own can of worms that, much like Time he can't quite go home as himself me thinks, as a treat to myself

Mostly Twilight x Reader, this goes out to all of the folks who never quite recovered from Twilight Princess and the fact we never got that sequel (I mean it gave us BOTW and TOTK and Wild, but at what cost?), but can be read as Link x Reader either on the platonic or romantic.

Don't think there's any warning this time but might edit later if needed.

Actually yeah there is one warning

TW:

References to body horror typical to Twilight Princess, though I recommend not reading it I'd you're squeamish period.

Even after so long, you and Twilight could still remember the beauty and solemnity of the Twilight Realm, with it’s zircon skies with clouds of trapped fire and rains of viper obsidian.

The silence of the infection upon the realm of light broken only by the echoes of the howling elegy of the Twili and Interlopers who came before creeping over the land like rot and wither over flowers, the lament of the lost spirits of the people and animals of Hyrule falling over your spirit like a shroud, a shared hymm from two worlds reality had been twisted, only both of it’s princess, one filled the luster of empyreal sorrow in her mind and one with the scorch abyssal fury in her heart knowing to see the reflective tragedy befallen to their people. With Link as the one who restored the memory of what once was in both worlds as divinity and calamity sang in his bones and you a witness to the restoration of harmony to the discordant symphony, the two different songs of light and shadow refusing to let go of either of you in an eternal duet.

(Once touched by magic, it shall never leave the one if holds onto Twilight may have been the one with the Beast in his soul, with the howl of a wolf, the bite of shades in his veins and the lament of innocents taking precedence over anything purely because he learned how to silence the whispers of the one’s who made a grab for heaven’s throat and we’re pushed in the cracks of reality for their prideful vánitas even as he could taste it in the back of his tongue, twining around his ribs and overgrowing into his shattered mirror heart like vines, flowering with the divinity and eternal nature of the Hero’s Spirit, already having the hunt of the Fierce Deity in it’s veins and the remains of cursed divinity welcoming the new aspect merrily so he could bear it. The song of the innocent wrongly punished among the sinners rang into your mind, scratched at your skin and dug it’s claws around your throat, chocking you with sorrow and regret, more willing to leave gouges than to let go of someone’s who’s looked into the reverse side of the sacred realm and wept with grief for it’s people and the curse of it’s beauty.

It would never leave you, Link or Zelda, who learned who love the darkness the way Midna did, madness and unsightly delight and all.)

While the people of Hyrule merely became trapped as observers at best, if they were lucky, Midna’s raging grief and resentment quickly became obvious, once she revealed that rotten Zant had done to her and her people, twisted into a new form, distorted in body and trapped in mind like the animals and beasts of Hyrule, their pain driving them in becoming feral attack hounds for the usurper, their howling screams as much sorrow, wailing in an attempt to let their agonized, tortured souls to escape from it’s mouth, a futile attempt to flee from the strain of reality forgetting their true form in favor of Zant’s twisted design, of being used as sentient canvases for cruelty and ruthlessness, of their will being stepped over in favor of corrupting recreation.

Of how it only didn’t quaff down at Midna’s mind because of the nature of her ephemerality, fully beloved by the Realm of Darkness, of how she loathed him for it and wouldn’t wish her fate of that of her people’s on any living or dead soul, once she came to love the Realm of Light through Zelda’s sacrifice.

Which was why, when you saw three of the victims of the telltale twisting from darkness utilized with the intent to drive one insane, a familiar looking plate of stone engraved on the remains of ashes from their identity, the curling of distorted, solid darkness making crooked mishapen manes, bent out of shape from their too long torso and long, long arms adorned with twitching, deformed claws, you feel very justified in way your blood froze, holding onto Wild’s arms and yanking with all you had so his shot will miss, his yelp of surprise swallowed by the bone cracking, blood curdling screech from one of the beasts as a Skyward Strike grazed it’s petrified flesh.

You feel something warm drip down your ears, taste the promise of violence and the cry of lost souls on the back of your tongue and swallow it down as the memory of the Twilight Realm attempted to bite and crack your ribcage to quaff down your heart, to devour it bones and all, calling out in desperation, “Don’t! That’s a person!”

Sky freezes, as still as a statue, Legend curses the heavens crimson in a way you are so glad Wind isn’t around to hear as he retreats Twilight snarls, the wolf in him revolted and disgusted, you wonder if the Twilight is singing in his mind too as he restrains himself from reaching for the crystal as nails just a tad too sharp invite droplets of blood to one hand, grimm as a graveyard “We need to get them together anyway, felling just one won’t be enough.”

You grimace, releasing Wild, keeping your eye on the Shadow Beasts and another on your group, pointedly not mentioning the twitch in Four, amethyst clouding his gaze and the prism of his eyes turning gray with memories you and Twilight both knew all too well, of the grimace in Time’s otherwise stony countenance, you’d wished to avoid bloodshed of whoever was turned against their will, but you and Twilight both knew that might not be possible, death, unfortunately, might be the greatest mercy you can grant these poor souls.

(The Twilight is harmonizing in your ears, jeering, you feel the Interlopers insanity and the Twili’s lament on your teeth. As lovely as it could be cruel, the merry feeling upon meeting, the sorrow at a parting.

If you ever see the Shadow, you might just try indulging the echo by offering it’s blood as tribute. You'd make it hurt. The fact it learned the spell used to deform reality in such a way was cruel and vile.)

“Legend, how is your magic?” shoots Warriors, analyzing, calculating, it snaps the purple back into Four’s gaze, brings his mind back to focus as he reaches into his inventory for his Moon Pearl, Twilight is circling the beasts with single minded purpose, herding them together and prowling as he would as a wolf, Wild thankfully listened to your warning and had switched from the more destructive Flame and Lightning Arrows to ice ones. It doesn’t contain them for long but it gives a few precious seconds to strategize.

Legend catches on, switching to the Ice Rod on one hand and grasping his own Moon Pearl with the other, Sky has another Skyward Strike ready, but doesn’t release it, you switch from your sword to accepting a Magic Rod tossed at you from Wild, “Good enough.”

You breath in shakily, the symphony of the Twilight Realm has quieted, more lament than anthem as it’s Hero steps back, returning to your side, he nods grimly, “... Then, let’s end this quickly.”

You know your will boys will do their best to heal them, and failing that, you hope that they’ll hear the requiem of the Twili rather than the lament once they’re at peace, that they'll find some form of threnody.

It is a horrible thing, to be forced to die as a beast.

[myslodsiewniav]

Niezbyt fajne jednak reperkusje skargi i kilka innych rozkmin.

14-04-2024

Drogi pamiętniczku... jestem, kurwa, jakimś zdechłym truchłem. Lunatykuję bardziej niż w piątek. Wpuszczam informację jednym uchem i przepuszczam przez drugie. NIC do mnie nie dociera. Działam na autopilocie.

Mam od wczoraj combo: zmęczenie + okres + alergia.

OMG co za zajob.

Wczoraj byłam na zajęciach na uczelni. Okazuje się, że przyjście na konsultacje wcześniej w tym tygodniu do dziekana - mojego love-człowieka na tej uczelni - by wyjaśnić wszystko co chodziło z tą skargą, było strzałem w dziesiątkę.

Bo się pan zaangażował bardzo.

Przywitał się na korytarzu, a potem kilka razy zagadywał mnie na korytarzu. A najlepsze było, kiedy wszedł na te nasze zajęcia z "tą panią prowadzącą na którą napisaliśmy skargę) i wchodząc od razu odszukał mnie wzrokiem, puścił mi oczko <3, "niby "coś przeczytał z informacji oprawionych i widzących na ścianach, pochodził sobie wzdłuż ściany" i wyszedł xD Mam wrażenie, że większość pogrążonych w pracy osób, w tym pani prowadząca, nawet nie zaczaiły, że na zajęcia wsunął się nam cichaczem dziekan xD. Koleżanka mnie szturchnęła łokciem zszokowana i tylko wskazała głową w bok. Ja jej na to "wiem, widziałam, jak wchodził. Puścił mi oczko", a kumpela tylko się uśmiechnęła zadowolona i obserwowała znad ekranu komputera, jak typ czytał sobie ramki zawieszone na ścianach.

Potem Ci, którzy zauważyli obecność dziekana śmiali się z tego dziwnego zachowania, jakby zupełnie nie łącząc faktów, że facet w zasadzie przyszedł by empirycznie sprawdzić jak wyglądają zajęcia na których poziom się skarżyliśmy.

A w przerwie SAM z siebie przyszedł do mnie, po 17:30, gdy siedziałam na przerwie z czołem wciśnietym w swój plecach próbując zarazem się trochę przespać i zarazem zwalczyć efekty alergii - wczoraj zaatakowała mnie tak kurewski mocno, że miałam do wyboru, albo ból głowy, potoki łez i smarków z nosa, albo wzięcie leku po którym mój organizm po prostu się wyłączał, zasypiał, a potem lecieć po kawę, któa przyspiesza metabolizm i przez te 4-5h leki przestają działać, więc znowu: zmęczenie, okres, do tego nasilający się ból głowy i potok łez ze smarkami. Więc druga tabletka i jeszcze większa senność. Siedziałam więc na przerwie taka zmarnowana, aż mnie ktoś za ramię łapie. Zaskoczona podnoszę głowę, a to dziekan, który mnie zapewnia, że mam się czym martwić, że wszystko będzie okay, że koniecznie mam mu dać znać jak poszły zajęcia itp. Wyjaśniam mu, że zajęcia było w porządku, ale jestem rozbrojona przez alergię. Laski z grupy, które siedziały na fotelach obok mnie zapewniają dziekana, że faktycznie jest okay, a on tylko poklepuje mnie po ramionach i zapewnia, że będzie okay i że dam radę.

xD

No to fajnie, bo czuję, że wsparcie przyszło.

Ale na zajęciach nie było tak kolorowo. Pani od skargi ani razu się nie odniosła do tego, że zachowała się ostatnio niezbyt profesjonalnie. Żadnego "przepraszam, zacznijmy współpracę jeszcze raz" itp - nic z tych rzeczy. Jak gdyby nigdy nic po prostu rozpoczęła zajęcia. Te same, DOKŁADNIE TE SAME, które próbowała zacząć 2 tyg temu. Hymm... Tylko, że tym razem my byliśmy stacjonarnie w klasie, a ona miała swój tablet graficzny i komputer podpięte do rzutnika. Widzieliśmy co robi i jak robi. To było spoko. Poproszona o przyjście z pomocą też przychodziła bezpośrednio do stanowiska by pomóc. To na plus.

Ale - czułam się bardzo źle. Pomyślałam, że nie będę siedzieć na tych zajęciach do 20 wieczorem, tym bardziej, że nie tak naprawdę nie musiałam: mam przyznany indywidualny tryb nauki. Nie muszę być na zajęciach wcale, to, że jestem to wyłącznie mój wybór. Dlatego chciałam po pierwszym bloku zajęć przedyskutować z nią warunki zaliczenia mojego IOS - tak jak planowałam, tak jak ustaliłam z panem dziekanem, że zrobię. Przypomnę: mam połowę semestru, pani wykładowczyni odkładała od marca podanie mi wytycznych zaliczeniowych. W końcu odpowiedziała na moje liczne, częste maile z przypomnieniem o konieczności zaliczenia IOS, że te warunki zaliczenia prześle do 15 kwietnia. Mamy dziś 14 kwietnia i NIC nie dostałam, dlatego miałam przyjść na zajęcia stacjonarne (jak ustaliłam to w tygodniu z dziakanem).

Na pierwszym bloku zbyła mnie informacją, że mam wracać na miejsce, że porozmawiamy po zajęciach. Okay. Wykonałam zadanie, prosiłam ją o feedback, o pokazanie wszystkiego - po prostu uczestniczyłam w zajęciach. Nauczyłam się. Było okay, jak dla mnie zbyt szybko i zbyt dużo opcji, poleceń, wiedzy - za dużo, żebym mogła swobodnie powtórzyć w domu - ale faktycznie to była solidna, merytoryczna dawka wiedzy. No i kończymy pierwszy blok zajęciowy. Podchodzę do niej, a ona, że też potrzebuje odpocząć (pewnie też się stresowała) i że porozmawiamy przed kolejnym blokiem. No okay. Więc spakowałam się (bo planowałam po tej rozmowie wyjść do domu, bo czułam się jak zombi w śpiączce, do tego czułam ból) i wyszłam "na przerwę" i wtedy złapał mnie dziekan z pocieszaniem.

Po powrocie na drugi blok podchodzę do babeczki, a ona każe mi usiąść, bo planowała najpierw całej grupie zadać zadanie do wykonania, a w czasie, gdy inni będą pracować ona porozmawia ze mną. Była zirytowana, że musi mi to mówić. To chyba jedyny raz, gdy wyszło z niej to, co zaprezentowała podczas pierwszych zajęć - wkurw, że coś jej nie idzie tak, jak planowała. No dobra. Siadam przy biurku, a ona prosi mnie, żebym włączyła znowu komputer. Westchnęłam, no okay, włączę, bo chcę zobaczyć i empirycznie przeklikać to co ona pokazuje - tak się uczę, empirycznie, powtarzając. Jestem wzrokowcem. Więc jak już jestem i nie mogę wyjść to przecież przeklikam, bo o tę wiedzę mi chodziło idąc na studia. Wyjaśniła nam co i jak przez chwilę. A jak przeklikałam, to wyciągam zeszyt, wyciągam swój kalendarz i idę do niej. Pytam czy teraz ma dla mnie przestrzeń, ona skinęła głową (miło, z sympatią, bez focha - spoko).

Siadam, otwieram notes i czekam. A ona bierze głęboki oddech i wypala "Proszę mi wyjaśnić po co w ogóle pani ten indywidualny tryb nauczania?". Zatkało mnie. Przecież jej to opisałam w wielu, wielu, wielu mailach jeszcze w marcu. Chwilę milczałam, wprawiona w stupor, nie będąc sama pewna czy może powinnam się czuć zlekceważona czy zła? I dlaczego zamiast podawać mi zadania do wykonania ona wystrzela z pytaniem, domagając się konieczności wyjaśniania swoich potrzeb (podważająca ich zasadność!), czyli "po co chcę coś realizować inaczej niż reszta?". Uspokoiłam się. No okay, jednak babeczka będzie miała ból dupy za tą skargę z mojej strony, ale naprawdę się stara tego nie okazywać. Okay, pomyślałam wtedy, że w takim razie mam podstawy by się czuć zlekceważona, bo ewidentnie obszerne i szczegółowe wiadomości ode mnie nie są i nie były przeczytane, a sam fakt trybu indywidualnego (zatwierdzonego przez jej bezpośrednich przełożonych, nie ma z czym babka teraz dyskutować!) jest przez tą panią podważany jako zasadny - kim ona jest by lepiej wiedzieć co mogę ogarnąć w życiu, niż ja? Cierpliwie, skupiając się na faktach wyjaśniłam, że tak, jak wyjaśniałam jej we wiadomości e-mail (musiałam wspomnieć o tych wiadomościach, sorry, nie po to uczciwie pisałam o co chodzi, i to tyle razy by teraz się z tego tłumaczyć) uczestniczę w tym semestrze w nauce na dwóch uczelniach i niektóre zjazdy lub zadania mogą ze sobą kolidować. W związku z tym mam indywidualny tryb nauczania.

A ona mnie zaczyna przekonywać, że POWINNAM przychodzić na wszystkie jej zajęcia stacjonarne. Że POWINNAM rozważyć możliwość wyboru zajęć u niej i z nią, jako bardziej priorytetowe niż zajęcia na drugiej uczelni jeżeli chcę się faktycznie czegoś nauczyć.

DA FAK?

Poczułam się traktowania nie jak dorosła osoba, a jak leser, leniuch, który unika nauki na wartościowych zajęciach.

Zatkało mnie.

Wyjaśniłam jej - naprawdę będąc w szoku i czując się zaskoczona kierunkiem w jaki potoczyła się ta rozmowa - czym jest tryb IOS. Wyjaśniłam jej, że bardzo chcę się uczyć, a ten tryb ma mi umożliwić naukę, a nie zapewnić unikanie zajęć. Że chyba dochodzi tu do jakiegoś niezrozumienia wartości - chcę się uczyć i chcę to realizować w trybie IOS. O tym zresztą informowałam opiekunkę kierunku, a opiekunka kierunku dając tą konkretną panią prowadzącą od grafiki do grupy odbiorców zaznaczyła, że ja mam dostać listę zadań do wykonania i już we własnym zakresie zadbać jak je wykonać, a nauczyciel ma mi wskazać wytyczne tylko. Takie wytyczne na podstawie których zaliczy mi przedmiot jako zdany.

Nie podoba mi się to i WOLAŁABYM być na zajęciach zawsze, ale czasem - tak jak wczoraj, czyli po 2 tygodniach nauki na dwóch uczelniach i zapierdolu totalnego w życiu osobistym, przyprawiona słabością związaną z utratą wielkich ilości krwi i atakiem alergii, nie wspominając o tym, że miałam jeszcze w międzyczasie wstrząs mózgu xD i mam rozmowy kwalifikacyjne, święta itp - po prostu nie dam rady być. I w ramach IOS mam dostać wytyczne jak zaliczyć by jednocześnie się nie zajechać.

Babka na to nalegała - grzecznie i uprzejmie - bym zrobiła wszystko by być na zajęciach u niej. Przyznałam, że na pewno będę, bo chcę się uczyć. A ona na to "a co jak pani będzie miała już wykonane zadanie, które pani grupa dopiero będzie przygotowywać?". A ja na to zaskoczona, że "Nie wiem, pójdę do domu odespać ten zapieprz, który mam od miesiąca?". A na to ta pani "Aha, to w porządku!". I dopiero wtedy mi wyjaśniła co będzie robione na następnych zajęciach. Podejrzewam, że to praca na nawet 3 lub 4 spotkania. Czyli w zasadzie te zadania mogą wyczerpać nasze możliwości czasowe z tą prowadzącą na ten semestr, ale mogą też nie wyczerpać.

Podała mi zadania, ale bez wytycznych jak to zrobić. Okay, tak mówiła, że tak ma być nasza opiekunka roku. Trochę mnie to wkurza, ale luz. Będę musiała poszperać. Mam do wykonania logo, ulotkę, dwa składy poligraficzne i grafikę z elementem photomontażu. Dużo i niedużo. A wszystko w programach, których nie ogarniam, będę musiała się ich nauczyć od zera. Jak będę na zajęciach to suuuuper. Jak mnie nie będzie to mam naprawdę spore wyzwanie.

No i babeczka znowu mnie pyta - jakby nie mogąc zrozumieć - po co mi ten indywidualny tryb? Czy ja nie chcę się uczyć? Czy ja nie chcę faktycznie tu być? Czy ja w ogóle mam świadomość jak to mnie obierze z wiedzy? Mówiła to taka zatroskana, taka ze współczuciem trochę, a trochę z niedowierzaniem.

I myślę, że gdybym była młodsza to by mi weszła babka na ambicje. Że przez indywidualny tryb "oszukuję", że "odbieram sobie szansę na odkrycie swojego potencjału", że to forma wagarowania, udawania zdobywania wiedzy. Ale teraz jestem stara dupa i mnie tylko tym gadaniem wkurzyła - wierzę, że typiara może nie rozumieć moich decyzji (w końcu nie jest mną, nie zna pełnego obrazu mojego życia, obowiązków, wartości, ma prawo nie wiedzieć), ale też kurwa nie ma prawa oceniać. Nikt jej o to nie pytał. Mam IOS, bo CHCIAŁAM mieć IOS. Wygrałam konkurs i jestem z tego powodu cholernie dumna, uważam, że to ważne, że zdecydowałam się podjąć wyzwanie nauki na dwóch uczelniach - to JEST ambicja do cholery!

Więc - pokrywajac irytację śmiechem - zarysowałąm granicę, że wiem co robię i jak robię; że spełniam swoje ambicje i korzystam z szans, jakie mi daje życie. Jestem tu, aby się uczyć, ale też tak, jak tego potrzebuję.

A babka na to tylko wzruszyła ramionami i wyjaśniła mi, że "no jak pani chce". I że jak mnie nie będzie na zajęciach to mam jej te wykonane grafiki przesłać, a potem pilnować na etapie, którego zaliczenia jest grupa xD, a jeżeli przekroczymy zagadnienia, które mi podała to mam przyjść do niej po kolejne wytyczne.

Byłam tak zmęczona i tak wytrącona z równowagi absurdalnością tej rozmowy (większość wykładowców, jak się dowiadywała dlaczego mam IOS gratulowali mi wygranej w ogólnokrajowym konkursie i życzyli powodzenia; podawali w treści maila, w podpunktach, zakres dydaktyczny swoich zajęć na ten semestr, lektury, którymi nadrobię materiał i wytyczne zaliczeniowego projektu. Nikt mi nie mówił, że źle robię decydując się na IOS, który przecież JUŻ TERAZ jest klepnięty - na czas negocjacji i niewyrażania zgody czas był przez wysłaniem wniosku do dziekana, na etapie gdy zbierałam zgody), że się wkurzyłam i przytaknęłam, wróciłam do biurka i chociaż leciałam z nóg wykonałam prędko to zadanie, które moja grupa wykonywała podczas naszej rozmowy i od razu je wysłałam do oceny. Dochodziła wtedy już 20. Więc z zajęć wyszłam o czasie według planu.

Ech.

No nie wiem sama.

Zdecyduję co i jak chyba jutro, bo dziś jestem padnięta.

Nie wiem czy o tym pisać do dziekana czy nie? Nie wiem po prostu co robić...?

Mam zamiar dziś sobie porobić zadanka.

A dziś przespałam ciągiem jakieś 12h, wstałam nieżywa. Jestem jak taki worek ziemniaków, nie mam siły. Boli mnie. Mam piasek pod oczami, jestem wielka i spuchnięta, obolała. I zalana krwią - przeciekł tampon i podpaska. I nie rozumiem co się do mnie mówi. Do tego do czasu wzięcia tabsy na alergię bolała mnie głowa. Jestem jak takie zombie.

Z uwagi na to, że dziś mam zajęcia zdalnie uczestniczyłam w wykładach z łóżka, pół-śpiąc, a potem już słuchając wykładów na słuchawka, jak wstałam, umyłam kwiatki doniczkowe pod prysznicem (mam ich 32 w domu obecnie, dlatego póki co prysznic wzięło 10 doniczek, suszą się na balkonie - kiedy ja tyle tych kwiatków adoptowałam!? Mam zielone mieszkanie, to jest okay, ale ile też to dodatkowej pracy generuje... ech), zrobiłam nam śniadanie do pracy na poniedziałek i wtorek (dopiero jak je zrobiłam to sobie przypomniałam, że mój chłopak nie idzie do pracy, bo mamy urlop...).

Działam na autopilocie teraz. Ech.

No i wczoraj odkryłam coś strasznego na temat jednego z mich ulubionych wykładowców. Światło tak niefortunnie na niego padało, że coś zauważyłam i nie mogłam już odwidzieć. I miałam przez to taaaaaaaką burzę emocji. Trochę nie wiedziałam co ze spojrzeniem zrobić, a trochę czułam się idiotycznie wchodząc w prywatność człowieka, którego baaaaardzo cenię. Ewidentnie -chyba- to nie jest świeża sprawa, ani nawet trochę świeża, to wszystko jest dawno za nim, ALE świadomość o tym co oznacza zauważona przeze mnie rzecz i o tym, że dziś, w kwietniu 2024 roku mogłoby nie być na świecie tak fantastycznego, zarażającego fascynacją wobec świata człowieka mnie zmroziła.

Po zajęciach podeszłam do niego by mu bardzo, bardzo, bardzo podziękować za prowadzenie tak fascynujących zajęć - bo oczywiście, jak już udało mi się zostawić prywatną sprawę tego pana, a wsłuchałam się w wykład to ZNOWU się wzruszyłam wrażliwością i fascynacją z jaką ten pan wykłada. Serio. Znowu siedziałam na jego wykładzie i chlipałam poruszona, że tak pięknie ubrał w słowa opowieść o historii świata. Rozbawiłam go tym. Powiedział - z humorem - że bardzo się cieszy, że tak mnie porusza, chociaż wcale nie cieszy go, że doprowadza mnie do płaczu. <3

Nie wiem czy uda mi się zrobić to zadanie konkursowe - teraz zamiast je robić pisze. ech. Zobaczymy.

Kolejna sprawa - mój chłopak wczoraj wyznał, że od baaaaardzo dawna zbiera się do zadania pytania: zapytał mnie czy przypadkiem, jak piszę tzw "odsiewam myśli" lub "muszę wyrzygać słowa, żeby zrozumieć co czuję, bo czuję za mocno" to czy przypadkiem nie publikuję tego z ubrarwieniem na jakiejś stronce i czy nie prowadzę w sieci drugiego życia, zbierajac followersów. xD

Bardzo mnie to rozbawiło.

Ale też uznałam, że częściej będę pisać pod kłódką. Dla niego.

Wyjaśniłam mu pingera, ludzi których znam i fakt, że nie zbieram followersów, ani nie prowadzę drugiego, tajnego życia w sieci. Ale faktyczne istnieją ludzie, którzy czytają moje rzygi. I że ja czytam literki tych ludzi, których mam wrażenie, że znam ponad 10 lat xD

Ale rozbawiła mnie zupełnie wizja "zbierania followersów" i prowadzenia drugiego, tajnego życia...

Ale on ma prawo tak to intrpretować.

I ma teraz rozkminę etyczną - czy to okay?

[trivialbob]

I enjoy reading these sorts of posts some of you write. It is only fair if I do one too. Thanks, @find-jupiter.

1. Are you named after anyone?

My uncle is named Bob. Bob's your uncle. I never really thought though that I was named after him. It never came up in conversation. He sometimes reads my Tumblr posts, so I will take this opportunity to let Bob know that I found a six pack of Hacker-Pschorr (Hacker was founded in 1417!) at the liquor store this week and bought it. That beer was sold at my college's student union. I don't think I've ever drank it anywhere else until this week. He mentioned Hacker-Pschorr to me when I saw him at a wedding this summer.

2. Do you have any kids?

Two sons, 27 & 29.

3. Do you use sarcasm a lot?

I probably do, and I hope I get it right, where no one takes offense. Not long ago a young cashier handed me too much change. I exclaimed "Oh my God!" as I held up the extra bill. She giggled. The right tone of voice and facial expressions are crucial.

4. When was the last time you cried?

I must have a little bit when my mom passed away in 2021. Sometimes I get teary eyed when I hear a song like Amazing Grace or Battle Hymm of the Republic.

5. What’s the first thing you notice about people?

Attitude. It takes a bit longer than recognizing body features, but it's where I seem to focus. Does the person smile and make eye contact or stare at the floor? Answer politely with a full sentence or grunt in annoyance?

6. Eye color?

Blue

7. What sports do you/have you played?

When I was younger: hockey, soccer, and softball. In high school it was track (1- and 2-mile) and cross country (3-mile or 5k). As an adult I played bandy and ran a lot of races from 5k to marathons (about 10 of those). Now mostly I ride my bicycles. I've tried pickleball a little bit as well.

8. Any special talent?

Sadly, no.

9. Where were you born?

Fairview Southdale Hospital in Edina, MN.

10. Scary movies or happy endings?

I'm not a fan of scary movies.

11. Do you have any pets?

Three Miniature Australian Shepherds. The breed is actually called Miniature American Shepherd, but I prefer Aussie.

12. How tall are you?

5'10"

13. What are your hobbies?

Trying different restaurants, bars, and breweries. Bicycling the trails and paths in Minneapolis (which is convenient for stopping at different bars and restaurants along the way).

14. Favorite subject in school?

Math and geometry were my favorites followed closely by English/grammar.

15. Dream job?

I always wanted to be a pilot. I don't have the eyesight for it, but I think I have the right temperament to safely do that work. Other than that I would love to be an expert in a unique field, like repairing a Stradivarius or wrenching on a Ferrari. Yes, I can do that job. The current wait time is six to ten months.

[midnight-star-world]

#CountryMusic

Darius Rucker - Carolyn's Boy

So today on the MSR (Midnight Star Review), I would like to talk about the latest album from Country Music Singer Darius Rucker. The new album is titled "Carolyn's boy" and was released On Friday October 6th, 2023. But before we dive into the new 14 track project. Let's talk about the Country Music Career of Darius Rucker first.

Some of the biggest hits from Darius include songs like "Wagon wheel" which features his buddies from Lady A, "It won't be like this for long", & "Come back song". And a few more hits from Darius include songs also like "Alright", "Don't think I don't think about it", & "If I told you". He was also Hootie from Hootie & The Blowfish. He has scored 3 number ones on my weekly lists MSR (Midnight Star Report) which combines both CMT (Country Music Television), the Billboard Country Music Airplay Charts, & even myself. The list also used to include GAC (Great American Country) until the list officially retired at the end of 2018. But before we dive too far off track, let's jump back into this new CD and show you some of the highlights I hear.

The current single from the CD is titled "Fires don't start themselves", and a former number one from another project as well "Beers and sunshines". Other songs you should check out are "In this together", "Never been over", & "Ol' church hymm" featuring Chapel Hart. Other songs I liked were "Have a good time", "Sure would have loved her", & "Southern comfort". Darius co-wrote 11 out of 14 tracks from the new project, and he had help from John Osborne (Brothers Osborne), & Michael Hardy (Hardy). The stand out tracks in my opinion are "7 days", "3am in Carolina", "Lift me up", & "Stargazing". Here is the rest of the track list up next.

Track list.

Beers and sunshine.

In this together.

Never been over.

Fires don't start themselves.

Ol' church hymm (Featuring Chapel Hart).

7 days.

Same beer different problem.

Sara.

Have a good time.

Sure would have loved her.

Southern comfort.

3 am in Carolina.

Lift me up.

Stargazing.

And that's a wrap for the track list. And on the MSR (Midnight Star Review), I would give this album a 4.75 out of 5 stars. The biggest question I have with the album is why are we revisiting "Beers and sunshine". But it is a very good album overall and Darius still in my opinion has one of the best voices in Country Music. Thanks for taking the time to read this review. See ya all next time.