#I made a wishlist and I have been going through the items on it trying to see what average prices are and such

[butterflies-and-bumble-bees]

*

[danpuff-ao3]

Sooo...

Fic-Binding.

Is a thing I'm going to learn this year! (This feels really awkward but I can't think of a smooth introduction, so here we are.)

Here on Tumblr was my first introduction to binding fics. It never occurred to me before that people would. I began following many amazing binders here on Tumblr and over on Instagram. My sweet friend Nina bound a short story collection of some of my fics for my birthday last year. And Lila gave me a copy of one of her fics. There is something so very special about seeing fics in physical form! It gives me all the warm and fuzzies!

...only it seems that if a gal wants her favorite fics on her shelf, she's going to have to bind them herself.

Now, I was tempted to share some progress pictures along the way, but I fear that would hinder my progress. My anxiety and perfectionism are strong. I do not like to be observed making mistakes. Even really minor ones. Even worse if people point them out to me, however well-meaning. I live with a deep and abiding terror of failure and judgment. Which...is it healthy? No. Am I working on it? Yeah. But my therapist and I agree that throwing myself into the deep end is not the right method for me, so alas...baby steps!

(Seriously, my partner and I have been together nearly 7 years and only this past year have I begun to try and test new things where he could see me do it. And there is no person on planet earth more supportive or less judgmental than my Eddie.) (But to be fair, when one is taught to hate themselves and see their only worth as their usefulness and productivity, well...The terror is quite real, and deeply ingrained, I'm afraid.)

I will try to take progress photos along the way and share them all in a photo dump when I'm feeling more comfortable and confident. Which is a long ways away as I've not even bound a book yet. Showing my errors should be easier when I can say "look but I fixed it!" By necessity I've become pretty good at teaching myself things, so with luck (and YouTube videos) I can do this!

And in the meantime I can at least write about my efforts!

Eddie, my partner, has been very enthusiastic since I first broached the subject of bookbinding and when my plans to gather supplies seemed to fall through, he agreed to help me get what I needed. He had me put supplies on an Amazon wishlist so we can purchase items when we can. The first purchase I made was the most necessary one, which was a printer. I got a little table to put it on, built the table!!!! (I am not very handy, okay. When I build anything, however simple, it's a huge accomplishment!) I set up the printer. Aaaand was resigned to wait however long until I could start.

...

...and then it occurred to me. "Hey, dumb-dumb, maybe you can start practicing parts of it now?"

Oh yeah! There are several parts to putting a book together. And so, I began! I chose a small fic, Orange Blossoms, to get a feel for how it would look printed out. I followed some online instructions. And it wasn't perfect, but it was in booklet form and I could fold the paper and everything was where it needed to be. Small success!

Then I adjusted the font size and reprinted, because the previous font size was teensy in Scrivener and GIANT in Adobe and on paper.

Next, I wanted to test printing multiple signatures. That one took a bit more work for reasons I can't properly explain. Even now I don't know why the original version was printing out the way it was, with a blank last page. In theory, it shouldn't have done that??

Anyway, I chose In My Veins (In My Blood) for this. Orange Blossom is 3k and fit into one signature. In My Veins (In My Blood) is 7k and I figured I could get 2 out of it. I figured starting small would be better so I don't waste paper and ink while trying to sort things out. Or you know...waste as little as I can.

I fiddled with some settings and such until the first signature printed right. Then I had to mess around to figure out where I needed to insert blank pages, and I changed my mind about where to put my mock copyright and title pages. Once I was happy, I then printed the second signature and then proudly waved them in Eddie's face!

Then, I found a gift card from Christmas and decided: hey, why don't I get some more stuff? Today my order came in and I got: an awl, needles, and waxed thread. Time to stitch those suckers together! I stumbled across a bookbinding video some months ago that I saved, so I pulled that up and went step by step. Measuring and marking where to put the holes. (Nightmare, btw, my brain hates numbers.) (Brain sees numbers and runs off scared; needs soothing and cajoling to come back out and get to work.) (The solution was obvious and didn't require actual math like the YouTuber told me but anyway that's not the point, the point is:) Then I threaded my needle and go to work!

Signature 1 was easy enough. But threading the 2 signatures together was not. First YouTube moved too fast and didn't explain things very clearly. Like...not verbally addressing each step in detail, but also with too many jump cuts for me to really tell what she was doing. But she referenced a Sea Lemon video which I found and was much more helpful!

And now I have 2 signatures threaded together! It's very rough and sloppy, but you know what...it's a first attempt, so whatever. (Look, even admitting that my first attempt is pretty "eh" hurts my soul, but here we are.) (At least you can't see it!)

So that's where I am for now! Eddie's going to peruse my list this weekend to see what he can get, and once I have the supplies needed for the next step, onto the next step I'll go! I do want to bind The White Road as my first actual bound fic, so I can work on fiddling with the typesetting a bit while I wait!

ALSO I ate dinner so late because I was so caught up in learning how to stitch those signatures!! I was like "okay this shouldn't take that long." Hey, self, this is a new skill you're learning. Maybe don't make assumptions. And at least double any time you think something should take. I sure scarfed down my food after that!

Anyway, I know it seems very silly that I'm too scared to show pictures, but even talking about it is a big step. It's like...well if this doesn't work out I'm going to look really dumb, huh? Better keep things all to myself so if it doesn't work out no one is disappointed or judging me or whatever. Much better to come out the gate with something to show, right?

But talking about stuff and sharing stuff is really important to me. It's this like deep inner need I've trampled down for so long, out of fear of seeming childish or silly at best, or at worst boring or burdening people. But maybe this is something some people are interested in. And I'll be generous with cuts and tags for easy skimming for those who aren't interested, and those who are, well...You're welcome to bits and pieces of my journey with me!

Speaking of tags, I've been trying to come up with a name for my "bindery." I thought of "Busy Bee Bindery" because I love bees and am quite busy, actually. But maybe it needs my name in it?? Idk I'm still brainstorming that one. Maybe by my next update I'll have one I can use for tagging! And you know...to slap on my bindings! 😄

[suhanisingh-blog]

I packed my bags and boarded the plane. It was the sensible thing to do, considering my 20s were moving way too fast and I hadn't accomplished anything worthwhile still. I felt this incredible anticipation to reach my destination and was delighted when the plane landed half an hour early. You see, I imagined moving cities would suddenly erase all that was holding me back. 'Onwards to a better life', they said and I hoped.

Stepping out of the airport, straight in the lap of this new city I could not help but wonder what the next year is going to look like. The thoughts in my mind ran through at 100 miles an hour- new people to meet, places to visit, local food to be had. And then the other kind, the slow thoughts that run like an 80s slideshow- the mortifying ones. Anxiety about making a career from scratch and living alone in a city where I knew not a single soul crept in.

The blank canvas that was my apartment stared at me. The excitement of finally having a place all to my own was immense. I could decorate it to my liking, give it a character it lacked at the moment. The 100 miles an hour thoughts again- Amazon Wishlist filled with home decor items, Pinterest mood boards, room transformation videos. Stubborn thoughts setting up expectations way ahead of any real work. I had always been like this- imagining the outcome even before I put pen to paper. Maybe that's why I was easily disappointed and lost interest in things when they didn't go a certain way, the way I'd imagined. But now, there was no going back. No safety net to fall back on. I'd come thousands of miles away from home to make a 'life'. What that meant, I still have no clue.

One week in and I was set. The Pinterest-y home was coming to life and I enjoyed my own company much more than I thought I would. Exciting days were ahead of me. This is all that I wanted. Or atleast I thought I did. Why did I have this stinging feeling at the back of my mind of not being where I belonged? I, somehow, loved and hated this new city. 'This is natural because it's your first time being so far away from home. It'll take some time.' I convinced myself.

It's been a year and I'm still convincing myself. I've grown to like this city but my heart still sobs like a baby when I can't visit home for small festivities, when I miss my favourite local street food joint, when school friends visit home and give updates about how our small town has changed. I have found replacements in this city for almost all the things I miss from back home. They still don't suffice.

Maybe this is what making a 'life' is. Moving away from home in hopes of a better future and then trying to find that same home in the place I ran off to. Yearning to go back but not having the courage to uproot the 'life' that I've created here because that'll just not be sensible. So, I wait for big festivals and important milestones to visit the one place in the world that satisfies my heart. Funny, isn't it? Now I desperately wish to go back to the same place I couldn't wait to get out of.

I have the outcome of my efforts in front of me and this time, I didn't run away. I made it turn out like I had imagined and somewhat made a 'life'. But what good is it if I'm still stuck in those slow thoughts that play like an 80s slideshow, only now the anxiety is about my home fading out in the background, leaving me all alone in this big, vibrant, city of dreams where my heart still fails to belong. Maybe this is what life is, an attempt at tackling adult problems governed by the mind, only to be defeated by the heart.

But don't take my word for it, I still have no clue what this darn thing is. I just wanna go home.

[mydarlinginej]

read my full review of georgie, all along by kate clayborn here.

In this heartfelt tale of one woman’s quest to reinvent herself, the acclaimed author of Love Lettering and Love at First delivers a poignant, witty reflection on how the hopes, dreams, and stories from our past shape our future . . .

Longtime personal assistant Georgie Mulcahy has made a career out of putting others before herself. When an unexpected upheaval sends her away from her hectic job in L.A. and back to her hometown, Georgie must confront an uncomfortable truth: her own wants and needs have always been a disconcertingly blank page.

But then Georgie comes across a forgotten artifact—a “friendfic” diary she wrote as a teenager, filled with possibilities she once imagined. To an overwhelmed Georgie, the diary’s simple, small-scale ideas are a lifeline—a guidebook for getting started on a new path.

Georgie’s plans hit a snag when she comes face to face with an unexpected roommate—Levi Fanning, onetime town troublemaker and current town hermit. But this quiet, grouchy man is more than just his reputation, and he offers to help Georgie with her quest. As the two make their way through her wishlist, Georgie begins to realize that what she truly wants might not be in the pages of her diary after all, but right by her side—if only they can both find a way to let go of the pasts that hold them back.

Honest and deeply emotional, Georgie, All Along is a smart, tender must-read for everyone who’s ever wondered about the life that got away . . .

my review:

A friend had recommended me this book and, trusting their judgment, I immediately requested it. And I’m so glad I did! Georgie, All Along was a sweet romance between two people who’ve spent their entire lives being misunderstood.

Georgie Mulcahy‘s back in her hometown, reeling from being let go from her long-time personal assistant role, having been told to go find herself. She’s ostensibly there to help her best friend Bel move into her new home and prepare for her new baby, but she arrives there to find that she’s got everything figured out. Bel unearths their old friend-fic, where the two of them had planned out their high school lives. Georgie sets out on a mission to accomplish everything in the journal, eventually with the help of Levi Fanning, whom she ends up being roommates with due to a misunderstanding.

I wasn’t aware that this was a dual-POV book going in, but I ended up really enjoying having both Georgie’s and Levi’s point-of-view! They’re both going through their own things: Georgie’s rediscovering herself and trying to accomplish the items on her list, while Levi is trying to make a life for himself in a town that only knows him by his bad reputation.

read my full review here.

[quaddmgd]

I've been playing Tomb Raider I-III Remastered since its release. I managed to beat TR1 + Unfinished business and I'm 1/3 through TR2. It takes me longer than I thought, mostly because of work and exhaustion, but I'm having so much fun. Let's talk about TR1 then!

I've never actually finished a Core Design Tomb Raider before. I really wanted to start from the first one, but no matter the version, MS-DOS, Windows or PS1, the jumping felt delayed to a point of being unplayable for me. Which... was really weird. Normally I enjoy playing older games and not many ever felt 'too old' for me to learn playing them. Remasters felt like my last chance to try and beat them and, well, turns out jumping in original TR1 is dependant on animations - cinematic platformer-style. The new release actually fixed that and it feels very responsive on a keyboard. That's the most important change for me.

TR1 feels so different from the Legend and Survivor trilogies. Compared to newer games, platforming requires an ungodly amount of precision to pull off and feels very rewarding in the process. Instead of being action-oriented it prioritizes being a puzzle-platformer first, while enemy encounters remain sporadic and rather unwelcome due to their jankiness. TR1 ends up being a really atmospheric, quiet and isolating experience, making you feel like you're really the first person to visit these locations in thousands of years - I really appreciate that.

Now, being a 1996 game, TR1 always looked stellar to me and if it weren't for my issues with platforming, I would've probably beaten the original a long time ago. That being said, I really appreciate the art direction this remaster goes for. It's a nice mix between somewhat cartoony models and the original level design allowing for gameplay to remain intact. It's not without issues (some spaces can be too dark, some items are harder to spot and hd textures don't blend that well together compared to the original pixel art - some of that was apparently fixed in a patch, but it'd have to go back and check), but its lighting system makes up for any flaws. To be honest lighting does all the heavy lifting in creating atmosphere and the way environment reflects colored light on Lara reminds me of RT global illumination solutions used in modern games, but retains the feeling of playing a forgotten early 2000s gem with an HD texture pack installed. I love it.

The photo mode is a nice addition too. I managed to snap a few pics and the ability to switch between old and new graphics helped with making side-by-side comparisons.

There are a few meaningful flaws, unfortunately. FMV cutscenes didn't get a proper upscale, but instead just a blurry filtering, making them look worse than the original ones. Some achievements appear to be broken as well, which can be a bummer as some of them are really hard to pull off. Switching to OG graphics caps frame rate to 30fps with a funky framepacing, NG+ is not NG+ but a hard mode, and all-new modern controls have already become infamous for limiting Lara's movement compared to tank controls and making the camera bug out in tight spaces. I encountered more issues, but most of them got fixed in a 1.01 patch, so overall I'm pleased with the state of the game.

Now there are communication and update accessibility issues I'm planning to touch on, but since they don't seem to affect the experience of actually playing the remasters, I'm going to do so in a separate post.

Playing through TR2, I noticed the bigger focus on action, which I heard will be also a thing in TR3, but aside from that it seems to be a great sequel!

I already made a wishlist of what I want to see in future patches (including a working wardrobe and outfits from other TR games hehe), but I have fun playing it and that's the most important thing about this collection. It was obviously made with love and I hope that updates will make it a perfect visual remaster in the future.

[notchainedtotrauma]

I’ve been going through a couple of harrowing months, and this December, I’m trying to ease into a more comfortable situation. I first want to state that I’m grateful for your continued support over these couple of months, for the people taking stuff off my wishlist and sparing 3$ (and also for the bigger donations, of course. 

This month, I’m trying to put an end to the unbearable food consumption issues I’ve been having, which means I have to bear the financial cost of feeding myself. I’m asking for 300$ to take care of this, and if you’re willing and able to help, you can do so through my Paypal ccd4t@virginia.edu. I also made a Christmas wishlist, and if you can withstand the high shipping prices, you can buy items off it here. 

Again, if you feel like people in your online/in person communities are currently more deserving help, feel free to focus your support towards them.

[violettelueur]

— JUJUTSU KAISEN EPISODE SEVEN || ASSAULT

↳ featuring : fushiguro megumi + kugisaki nobara + zenin maki + inumaki toge + panda from jujutsu kaisen

↳ warnings : mention of forced marriage + EXTREME grammar issues

↳ form : story

↳ published : 28 february

↳ pronouns : she/her

↳ word count : 2.5k

↳ synopsis : within the jujutsu world, there were three famous clans to be aware of, the Kamo clan, Zenin clan and the Gojo clan. However, unknown to many sorcerers there was one last family that was known to be apart of the three, only for them to disappear after the golden era leading some to speculate that they had died in battle after the sealing of ryomen sukuna, but....

↳ previous episode : after rain 

↳ next episode : boredom

↳ barista’s notes : hi again....barista violettelueur is back from the shadows of not writing anything  ┬┴┬┴┤•ᴥ•ʔ├┬┴┬┴ but i want to apologies to you all for not working on your coffee orders, i just been really being in a non productive mood theses days but i should really bring it back up since i have mocks coming in soon....ʕ ㅇ ᴥ ㅇʔ but overall, i hope you enjoy today’s episode and have a wonderful day/night ʕ•ᴥ•ʔﾉ♡

BEFORE READING, I NEED YOU TO BE AWARE OF THIS:

1. the whole story belongs to Gege Akutami and the credits go to them and them only.

2. the spell curses used belong to Tite Kubo due to them being the ‘Kidos’ being used on the manga and anime ‘Bleach’ - but none is mentioned in this chapter.

2.5 for the ‘cursed spells’/kidos (bleach) i will link this video here and tell you the time stamp to check out what i am intending to show - remember i add a few twist here and there by adding the katana to link with Y/N’s cursed technique

no cursed spells used this episode...

3. if you are confused on anything, please don’t hesitate to message me since i know this whole thing is so confusing.

“I think you can do that,” you stated in a quiet tone, causing Fushiguro to look in your direction only to see you staying still in the position that you had set yourself in before slowly pulling yourself back up to sit in a normal position, leading Fushiguro to go back to what he was in deep thought about.

‘I don’t get it, though. Why...did you run back then? What a waste of talent, but the girl back at that place, she knows how to use her technique extremely well’

“You possess such intellect, such skill, such power and such talent and yet you refuse to go against me with your full potential, are you mocking me?”

‘I have the potential to beat special grades? Is that what he meant by that?’ Fushiguro thought, before turning to look at you to discover you were looking into the distance while continuously sipping on your orange juice like the addict you were. 

‘What was she trying to tell me? It seemed like L/N knows something...intellect?’

Slowly but curiously, Fushiguro began to reciprocate your previous movements by letting his hand touch the step between his legs before waiting for a second to see what you were trying to inform him, only for his hand to steadily go deeper into his shadow leading him to widen his eyes at this discovery.

“Tuna, tuna,” Inumaki mentioned, as he pointed at Fushiguro since he noticed what he was doing, leading Zenin and Panda to look at their classmate wanting to know what he was trying to bring their attention to.

“Huh? What?” Zenin asked in confusion, before turning her head in the shikigami user’s direction to realise what he was doing.

“Senpai, I think I can do it,” Fushiguro stated, with a rare smile before looking in your direction once again to see you were still staring at the field in front of you.

‘Such intellect…’

                                               ꕥ

 “Ahh?”

Suddenly, after you masterfully was able to swipe Zenin’s footing with the metal pole-arm she had given you for the practice match, you were suddenly hoisted into the arm once you fully turned around, only to suddenly find Panda effortlessly lift you up with his paws on either side, catching you by complete surprise.

“Are they finally going to get her?!” Kugisaki shouted in question since, for the past few days of training, no one was able to defeat you in any of the practice matches they had set out.

However, before Panda could act of on his plan, you gracefully spun your body around to face the other way like a professional gymnast before concentrating your cursed energy to your leg and foot as you swang down to kick the sorcerer in the back causing the animal to let go of the pole in pain as he fell while you landed with some stagger since you didn’t have enough time to plan your footing with Inuamki behind you to make sure you didn’t fall down.

“Maybe not...” Fushiguro muttered while sitting next to his classmate as both of them were sitting on the stairs spectating the fight going on between you and the two other second-years.

“Wow!” Kugisaki gleefully mentioned as she lightly clapped her hands for your performance.

“Ah sorry senpai, did I kick you too hard?” you sincerely asked, as you crouch down by his side to check if he was doing okay, to which he gave you a thumbs up to indicate his well-being before praising you for your performance which led you to stand up straight to move over to Zenin to give her a hand on getting back up.

“You’re really strong,” Zenin muttered with a smile causing you to smile back before stating, “Nah, you really made it challenging since it’s been a while since I fought someone good with weapons,” which lead your upperclassmen to tell you to get Fushiguro since it was his turn.

Leisurely walking to your classmates by the stairs, you casually threw the pole towards Fushiguro, who caught it instantly, before mentioning to him that it was his turn to train with Zenin leading him to get up from his seat to move to his designated area for you to then take his seat next to Kugisaki, leading to your classmate to place her head on your shoulder as you took out your phone to scroll through a bit.

“Is that your sister, Gojo?” Kugisaki question, leading you to turn your head slightly to look down at her only to find her staring down at the screen of your phone to which you turned back to you.

“No, that’s my mother,” you answered as you stare down at your wallpaper that showcases a picture with you and your mother in what seemed to be in a professional setting as you both were seated on what seemed to be on an antique-like style couch while wearing similar baby-blue colour dresses as you had a familiar bouquet of blue hydrangeas with white roses in hand.

“Really?! She looks so young,” Kugisaki commented, as she, in a state of shock, grabbed your wrist and looked closer into the screen to observe the picture. “You really suit baby-blue as well, but black is more of your suit in my opinion,” your classmate commented as she released her grip before lifting her head off your shoulder to peer at your outfit.

At this current moment in time, you were wearing some black nylon cargo joggers as well as black trainers paired with a long-sleeved black cropped top since you knew it was going to be a little hot today but you never really liked wearing bright colours - you were just more comfortable with darker ones like your uniform.

“Do you think so? So, should I get this Balenciaga bag then?” you asked as you tilted the phone towards her to show the bag that has been on your wishlist for some time.

“You like Balenciaga too?!” Kugisaki screamed in shock as she turned to you with widened eyes, resulting in your doing the same, only for you both to then suddenly thoroughly search the whole website to tell each other your favourite items while planning a shopping trip together since you both were giving each other ideas on clothing to purchase.

“That’s such a cute jumper,” you commented, as you, once again, presented Kugisaki your phone for her to agree with you before showing a jacket that she has been eyeing for quite some time. “That looks so good, you could pair it with a jean skirt and maybe a top, maybe orange to match your hair,” you commented, leading Kugisaki to smile and nod at you.

“That jumper is quite long, so you could wear like a cropped white turtleneck or maybe the same coloured blue dress shirt, add that to your wishlist!” Kugisaki mentioned, while at the same time pressing the heart icon to add the item on your wishlist without you lifting a single finger.

Suddenly, while you two were busy looking up items together, a sudden shadow overcast you both leading you to look up to find a roughed up Fushiguro in front of you before he mentioned that it was Kugisaki’s turn to train which cause her to pout before giving her phone to you, so you could take care of it before making her way to the two second-years that were waiting for her as the shikigami user took her seat.

“How was it?” you asked, as you closed your phone, only to hear a sigh from your classmate.

“It’s not bad, just not used to using weapons,” Fushiguro commented, as he stared out into the distance to see Kugisaki running away from Panda with Zenin looking at them in complete confusion.

“We got more than a month left, you should be fine,” you commented, as you looked at your phone screen to see the date. “Besides, you won’t constantly use them but it’s good to use since you can combine physical attacks with weapon attacks when it comes to battle,” you explained as you continued to stare at the family photo on your phone.

‘When was the last time I wore a dress like that?’ you thought, as you tilted your head in confusion.

“What was the reason you kept being on the run?” Fushiguro suddenly asked, causing you to break from your trance to turn to look at your classmate in confusion, only to discover a nonchalant look on his face like it was a common question to ask - maybe it was for the jujutsu sorcerer world.

“Because I’m not supposed to exist Fushiguro, you’re a Zenin by blood, you should know that my clan shouldn’t exist after the golden age, we disappeared,” you answered since you were perplexed on why the sorcerer beside you, asked a question with an answer that he probably already knows.

“But you’re a powerful sorcerer, you wouldn’t have that much trouble would you?” Fushiguro asked, leading you to shift your eyes down to avoid any eye contact before turning back to the track field in front of you to see the now common sight of Kugisaki being spun around in the air by Panda.

“I don’t know what they’ll do to me, I don’t need a bounty on my head everywhere I go, it was better for me to hide in the shadows as long as the L/N clan did,” you answered with a hushed tone, to which Fushiguro barely caught since you turned so quiet.

                                             ꕥ

“If any of the other clans knew of her existence, she would be forced to bring the L/N clan back up again or forced into a marriage,” Gojo explained, as he relaxed in his usual black chair, while Fushiguro leaned against the windows of the room they were at right now.

“Marriage?” Fushiguro questioned in confusion since he was confused on what the point of you being in a forced marriage when you were enough as a sorcerer by yourself.

“To continue the inheritance of her cursed technique,” Gojo informed his student, as he sat up from his relaxed posture. “Her inherited cursed technique is an extremely powerful one that any sorcerer wants, I don’t think she has mastered all the extreme spells as of this moment in time, but she knows what she is doing,” Gojo expanded on his explanation while tilted his glasses down to eye his student to check if he understood what he had said so far.

“But what would a marriage between the clans do? It would only decrease the change of the technique even being inherited,” Fushiguro asked, only for his teacher to smirk.

“I’m sure Y/N knows this, but that’s what the Zenin Clan demanded back in the Heian era before Sukuna was sealed, that a marriage was needed to ‘strengthen their power’ only for the L/N clan to refuse,” Gojo stated bluntly causing Fushiguro eyes to widen, as the Six Eye sorcerer continued with, “her real existence must be kept a secret and that’s my job now as her adoptive father since I’ve been entrusted with her safety,”.

“Entrusted? By who? L/N?” Fushiguro interrogated in a perplexed tone, only to receive a shrug at the end, gaining no answer to his pending question.

                                              ꕥ

Continuously staring at you, Fushiguro couldn’t but recall the conversation he had with Gojo, remembering the details that were mentioned within the chat. There was no surprise in his mind now on why you were extremely anxious about him and Gojo when you first met them; you probably thought you were going to be forced into something that you didn’t want to happen.

“Do you…hate me?”

“Huh?” you confusingly said before quickly turning your head to look at Fushiguro, once again seeing his usually stoic face looking straight at you while you gave him the surprised look. “What makes you ask that?” you queried since you didn’t expect him to ask such a question especially since you both had worked together for a few weeks now as well as fought together against Sukuna back at the Eushi Detention Centre.

“Since I’m a Zenin by blood, do you-” Fushiguro explained before he was cut off by you flicking his forehead with your finger in an annoyed manner, as the impact reflected on your emotions causing Fushiguro to wince slightly at the pain since he didn’t expect it to hurt as much as it did.

“Why would I hate you? As much as I hate the Zenin clan for what they did to my clan, you and Zenin-senpai ain’t that bad. In fact, you both ain’t bad at all,” you stated before sighing in annoyance since it was an extremely stupid question for him to ask. “Fushiguro, if I hated you, I would have made you fight Sukuna alone and wait until he came to me, don’t you think, you drag?” you rhetorically asked, before lightly slapping the side of his head to shake some of his brain cells to wake up before looking at the track field to see Kugisaki getting up from the floor with an angered expression as she demanded a re-match causing you to giggle lightly at the sight.

“We’re cool Fushiguro, there’s no need to worry about it,” you reassured the sorcerer, before standing up on your feet with your hand out towards your classmate’s direction.

“Come on, it seems like we’re taking a break and about to run some errands for the second-years,” you commented, causing Fushiguro to turn to look at the field to see Inumaki signalling a timeout sign before imitating a drinking action, informing you both to get some water for them as well as yourselves.

Taking your hands, he pulled himself up before you both disconnected your hands, leading you to turn around to grab the desired bottles of water that were required before coming back to resume training.

“Gojo! Wait for me, we need to talk more about our shopping trip!” Kugisaki loudly shouted, causing you to halt and turn your head to see your classmate rushing up the stairs to come to you before resuming once she was by your side.

Slowly from behind, Fushiguro decided to walk behind you both as he knew his upperclassmen would tell him to hurry up with the errands that they had placed on your three.

“You really need to stop with your assaults Gojo,” Fushiguro stated, as he pressed his index and middle finger on the middle of his forehead, as he remembered the pain that came along with your flick as well as complaining about the side head slap he had gained from you.

“Nah, you just got to stop asking stupid questions Fushiguro,” you commented back before asking Kugisaki want she was planning to get.

‘So make sure you’re not alone in this world like I am Y/N, I want you to be happy even when we’re both stuck with this burden!’

‘I’m trying mother,’ you thought, as you tightly gripped your phone that was still in your pocket.

© violettelueur 2021 : written and published by violettelueur - do not steal or repost

[doublekrecs]

Going Live

Spencer Reid x Reader

Synopsis: You're an intern for the FBI but double as a camgirl in your spare time. You thought you kept things pretty well under wraps but who knew one of your mentors watched you all along. 

Warnings: smut, unprotected p in v action (remember to wrap it), face fucking, use of sex toys, tiny bit of degrading

a/n: writing this in the setting of season 10/11 because spencer looks so damn good and i wanted to include my girl tara

also part 2 of more than physics should be up later today! hope you enjoy -🧞‍♀️

You had been a paid intern for the FBI for about a year, paid being said lightly. But the job was definitely worth it. While being under the wing of the BAU you had not only learned so much about your hopefully future profession, but you had made a family with the team. Especially under the wing of Tara Lewis, she had been there for a little while but you looked up to her work and she was more than happy to offer advice and a good wine night.

The team knew you had a second job on the side but weren’t exactly sure what it was, just that you worked from home. They respected your personal life enough to stay out of it, however that didn’t stop Rossi from offering you a little extra because “that's what uncles are supposed to do”. You would always wave him off and say you could handle yourself, because you could. 

You thoroughly enjoyed working. The money and gifts were obviously a big reward but there was always something so exciting about being on camera. Maybe it was how risque it was, being exposed for thousands to see. Or the fact that many were pleasuring themselves to the sight of you.

It was Friday night and you were getting your setup ready. You already had your outfit and glam on. Someone had sent you a set from your wishlist, lilac lace hugged your body in all the right places, accentuating all your assets and boosting your confidence. In your hair were the same color streaks you did with a tinting spray. You set the camera and laptop up in front of your bed. Silk sheets and plush pillows behind you where you could rest comfortably before your show started. 

Little did you know across town Spencer Reid was getting ready to tune in to said show. He was never one for tech, having Garcia still hand him paper files and would refuse to upgrade his phone. He had gotten a computer just so he could video chat with doctors quickly about new medicine for his mother. However he quickly found out there was so much more the internet had to offer.

_

He had stumbled across your show one lonely night. Spencer couldn’t see himself going out to find a one night stand so the pleasure of his hand it was. He was looking through videos when he saw the thumbnail with a girl wearing glasses similar to the ones you wear when you forget contacts. His curiosity got the best of him and if he was a cat he’d be one life down. He couldn’t believe the sight on the screen in his lap. 

There you were the bubbly intern, body trembling as waves of pleasure washed over you from the pink wand you held over your clit. He was delightfully flustered and the moans spilling from the computer’s speakers weren’t doing much to help.

He was entranced by you writhing in pleasure but was knocked back into reality after hearing you giggle. God he loved when you made that noise in the office, usually after fake flirting with Hotch or hearing about JJ’s boys. But this situation was totally different and if he was honest with himself he was very into it. 

You reached over to grab a large pink dildo. Taking it in your mouth before swiping it through your folds. It easily slipped in and you started rapidly pumping it into you chasing your orgasm. 

Spencer was too enthralled to even think about touching himself. He was using the gift which was his eidetic memory to the best of his ability to make this something he’d never forget. 

You came with a loud moan, hips lifting and grinding against the toy to chase the friction. Quickly you turned off the wand and took the toy out. You sat up and looked into the camera before sucking it off. Spencer's eyes widened as he let out a groan shifting on his bed. 

“Alright guys that was fun for tonight,” you said as you sat criss cross on the bed. “I didn’t think I’d be able to get to five.”

FIVE?? He thought in his head. He felt like he was gonna explode just watching those last few minutes. How was he supposed to last watching you make yourself cum five times. 

“Thank you so much for all the tips and support! My links are all in the description and I’ll see you angels next Friday! Muahh” you signed off blowing the camera a kiss. 

Spencer knew it was wrong of him to view a coworker in such an exposed light but he couldn’t help himself. So he spent the night viewing some of your old videos which brought him to what he swears to be the best orgasm of his life. Of course he sent gracious tips and made sure to buy little items off the wishlist, mentally noting to return every Friday night. Even if it meant hiding in the bathroom from Morgan in their shared hotel room on cases. That was two months ago. 

_

Just as you finished your session the phone rang signaling a case. Quickly you got in the shower and put on comfy business clothes since you usually stayed with Garcia doing extra research and taking notes. You quickly grabbed your bag and keys, making your way straight to the office. 

In the elevator you heard someone calling to keep it open. Spencer made his way in, buttoning his cardigan and adjusting his bag, quickly saying thank you. You pressed the button to the floor as you felt a pair of eyes on you. Looking over Spencer was eyeing you with a confused look on his face. You were about to question him when he spoke up first. 

“I thought you had streaks in your hair”

“I did… Earlier tonight but they washed out.” He looked even more confused, then his brain put two and two together. He just realized what he had said. For a genius this wasn’t one of his brightest moments. 

You looked at him amused as a deep blush spread from his neck to the tips of his ears. There was only one way someone would know about your quick hair change: by watching your show. The door to the elevator opened and you walked out giggling as he started sputtering apologies behind you. You quickly cut him off. 

“Spence, it's alright. If you want we can talk about this later because right now you have a bad guy to catch. But may I suggest making your name something less obvious, not that I don’t love ‘magiclover187’.” He stood there mouth gaping as you patted his shoulder and walked up to the conference room to meet the rest of the team. 

_

The case was one of the easier ones. Very minimal killing and the team was back by Tuesday morning, ready for a week of paperwork. Spencer had been dancing around you the whole time, he could barely keep eye contact with you and would rush to leave the room if you walked in. If he was this flushed around you with clothes on you could just imagine how much of a mess he would be when he watched you perform. Which brought an idea to your head. 

Friday rolled around and you walked over to his desk where he was nose deep in one of his Russian books. You put your hand in it to bring it down. Once he noticed it was you he was about to start with another ramble of apologies when you stopped him.

“Alright I’m tired of the awkwardness and I want my friend back,” you said with a soft smile. “Why don’t you come over tonight and we can have that talk. I’ll even order a pizza and we can watch Doctor Who.”

“Y/n are you sure? I-I mean it is um uh Friday.. And ya know you usually film,” he said as he played with his tie. 

You giggled at how nervous he was. Poor little genius didn’t know he was the only one with tricks up their sleeve. 

“It’s fine I promise. Just a night with my favorite customer,” you said winking at him. He choked and looked around to see if anyone was looking at his outburst.

“I’m kidding.. Sort of,” you trailed off. “But I mean it about you coming over. I’m going home now but I expect you there in an hour with drinks.”

With that you turned around and walked off, adding a little extra sway to your hips. Obviously that did the trick as you heard a small groan behind you. Spencer dropped his head back as he started wracking his brain to figure out how to live through the night without making a bigger fool of himself or cuming in his pants. 

_

You know maybe you were evil, you thought to yourself as you put on the finishing touches to your outfit for the night. Once you got home you sped into the shower to freshen up for him to come over and get your setup ready. You were wearing a cream colored strappy bodysuit. Over it was a large cardigan, almost resembling the maroon one he owned, strange. To top it off you were wearing your glasses and your legs were adorned with your favorite thigh high socks. 

The three knocks on the door instantly made a smirk appear on your face. This might just be one of your best schemes yet. Looking through the peephole you saw Spencer gnawing on his bottom lip holding a few bottles of soda. Taking a deep breath you opened the door greeting him with all the casualty in the world. 

“Hey! I’m glad you came, come in.”

He followed you in and tried to keep his eyes above your neck, trying to act like he wasn’t getting completely hard by just your outfit.  You sat down on your couch and patted it for him to sit next to you. He took the seat and gulped not really sure what you had planned. 

“Um how long for the pizza to get here?” 

“The pizza’s not coming Spence,” you said shaking your head. “But you are.”

You leaned forward to place your hand on his on the couch. “I want you to fuck me on camera Spencer,” you said with sweet confidence, fluttering your lashes. His eyes kept flashing between your cleavage showing through the cardigan and your lips before finally landing on your eyes. He didn’t see a single hint of humor in them, nothing transparent but lust. 

He pulled his hand from under yours to place in your hair, pulling you into a heated kiss. You pushed back on his chest a bit to try and get some air. 

“Save that magic for the show,” you said as you pulled him up to lead to your bedroom. 

The camera was set at a little bit of a lower angle. The audience would just be able to see you and at most Spencer’s chest. You had made sure it was fine and even turned it on as a test so he could see what he looked like. After you got everything out of the way you hit the button to go live and instantly people started flooding in. If the bulge in his pants told you anything, it was that he was excited to be on the other side of the screen this time. 

“Hello my angels!” you said into the camera, Spencer was taken back at what was going on. After months of lusting over the young intern he was finally seeing the show in person. 

“Today I have a special guest with me. My very good friend, the Doctor,” you took his hand to pull him into frame. “He’s very excited to be here,” you said, hand moving down to palm him through his pants. 

His hand reached out and wrapped around your throat, making you look up at him. Huh. This was a new Spencer you wouldn’t mind seeing more often.

“Let's not play games princess. Or else the only thing making you cum tonight are your pathetic little fingers. Am I clear?”

You shivered at the intensity of his voice instantly trying to nod the best you could within his grip. He let go and you went back to task at hand, undoing his pants and pulling them down along with his boxers. He was long and pink. Precum already spilling out of the pretty tip, you couldn’t wait to have him in your mouth, among other places. You wasted no time in licking a broad stripe along a vein under it. His hand went to grab a handful of your hair giving it a testing tug as a warning to stop teasing. 

Your hand went to grip what couldn’t fit in your mouth but you tried your best to take him all in. You could hear the pings of tips and comments being said. Spencer could too and leaned over slightly to read them. 

“Face fuck her,” he murmured. He pulled you off of his cock and looked down into your eyes, “Is that what you want princess? Hm.” His thumb went to clean up the spit dripping down your chin before rubbing your lips. “You want me to fuck your face?”, he said in a condescendingly sweet voice. 

“Yes Doctor please! Fuck my throat.” 

“Good girl.”

Both his hands made their place nested in your hair, guiding you to his cock. He wasted no time in being brutal. Tears were leaking down your cheeks as he kept on hitting the back of your throat. Spencer was enjoying himself to the fullest letting out curses and praises at how good your mouth felt. He knew he wasn’t going to last much longer and you could feel it too as he started to throb in your mouth. He then pulled you off, a trail of spit connected from your lips and his cock. 

“Such a dirty whore for me. Show everyone how messy I make you,” he took your head and made you turn to look in the camera. Comments pinged talking about how pretty you looked with mascara running and smudged lipstick. 

“Thank them and ask if you deserve to cum on my cock,” Who knew Spencer had this in him. But you were loving every second of it and put on your best pair of puppy dog eyes to beg the camera for Spencer to split you in half. And you had no shame in doing so. 

“Please let the Doctor fuck me. I’ve been such a good girl for you guys,” you pleaded into the camera. The audience was pleased with your begging as they said you deserved it for being so good. 

Spencer took his time in unbuttoning the cardigan you had on, teasingly rubbing your arms as he slipped it off. His hands then went to the bodice of it, groping your breasts and teasing your nipples through the fabric. 

“Ah shit doctor, please fuck me already.”

Who was he to deny you of such a thing when you asked so nicely. He pushed you back down on the silk sheets. Pulling you by your thighs to the end of the bed where he moved the thong of the bodysuit to the side and slid his cock up your folds. Lubricating it in your juices before slipping right in. You both gasped at the intrusion, his hands grabbing your hips with a force sure to leave bruises. He used the leverage to set a brutal pace, ramming his cock into you. 

Your ears were ringing from the pleasure but you could hear the constant pings of your tip box and comment section flooding. 

“Shit baby you’re so tight. Perfect little pussy squeezing me so good.” You babled off thank yous and whimpers from being so close to your climax.

 You felt Spencer stop for a second and reach over to grab something. Then you felt it. Your wand set to the highest setting placed on your clit as he started to thrust into you again. Sounds of your moans and skin slapping together filled the room along with the buzzing of the vibrator. You were sure there was going to be a noise complaint notice on your door in the morning. 

You were so close to having the bubble in your stomach burst and so was he. 

“I'm gonna cum Doctor,” you practically yelled. “Please cum inside me!”

“Cmon princess. Let me feel you let go.”

With that the knot broke and you swore you died and went to heaven. Your walls squeezing Spencer led him to his end a little after you. Thrusts faltering and groaning at the feeling of pleasure washing over him. He turned off the wand and put it to the side before slipping out of you. 

Looking into the camera you gasped at your appearance. Hair disheveled and face messy from crying in pleasure multiple times that night. Your mixed release leaking down your thigh and onto the sheets. 

There were non stop pings of people calling Spencer a lucky bastard and asking for him to come back next Friday. Spencer nodded his head over to your bathroom to get you guys something to clean up with and let you do your closing. 

“Thanks for the love tonight angels,” you said with a smile on your face, entirely blissed out. “As always the links are in the description and I’ll see you guys next Friday. Maybe I’ll talk to the Doctor about future appearances. Bye!” 

With that you fell back on your bed and closed your eyes. Your body jolted at a sudden coldness between your thighs. 

“Right sorry,” Spencer whispered.

“So where did that come from?” you looked at him with an eyebrow raised. 

“A magician never reveals his secrets,” he stated seriously. 

You giggled and took his hand, “Thanks for doing this with me.”

“Of course. Now why don’t you shower while I get us a pizza. For real this time.”

“Or we can shower together then call the pizza.”

He contemplated it before smiling at you, “You always have the best ideas.” 

“Don’t I know it.. Doctor.”

[thessalian]

Thess vs Yet More Demos

So while I did finish the main campaign of Solasta: Crown of the Magister, I did also spend a lot of the weekend just plugging away at demos. Because my wishlist isn’t big enough. Thankfully for my bank account, most of these aren’t out yet, and a lot of them are liable to be fairly inexpensive when they are. So here’s my opinion on what I’ve spent the weekend doing.

Catizens: This one’s a weird sort of crossbreed game - social elements like The Sims, but mostly a colony creation simulator. Except with anthropomorphic cats. It’s kind of cute, and has thus gone on the wish list.

Witchy Life Story: Much like I Was A Teenage Exocolonist, I played this one until the demo ran out and then was very disappointed that there was not more game, and even more disappointed that there’s no release date. It’s a fairly Zen crafting / puzzle game with an interesting story element to it that feels a bit like Stardew Valley in its “getting to know the locals” theme, and I will just have to keep an eye out for an actual release date.

Gatcha Garden: This is an intensely Zen kind of game. It’s got a Dorfromantik feel to it in that you get random things in order to make ... well, in this case a garden, but there’s no points system or anything. It’s just, “If you don’t like it, recycle it and try again”. It’s a cute little game, and one I wouldn’t mind having just to Zen out about.

Storyteller: Not quite what I thought it was going to be, but fun anyway. It’s like that whole bit of hidden object puzzle games where some of them have the whole “tell a story by selecting the items / people in the right sequence” sections; just separated out on its own. So that sounds fun.

Common’hood: Sort of a colony sim, of sorts, but with some story elements. It’s honestly a lot better story-wise than things like Stardew Valley - while wish fulfilment of “You’ve been given a farm to get out of your dead-end job” is nice, sometimes you want the hope-punk of the more realistic “Dad died, hospital bills drained all the money, got evicted, but there’s the abandoned factory and people squatting here like me so maybe we can really make something of this” variety. Only problem? First person again. Not the kind of thing I can do to Zen out, all things considered. A maybe, but I can think of better things simply from a health perspective.

Lego Brick Tales: It’s a lot more fun than I expected it to be, though honestly, I think I prefer the Zen of following specific instructions to assemble Lego (not to mention the physical pieces) rather than trying to put together a thing on my own with a computer telling me I did it wrong. Still, the physics are pretty satisfying and the story element’s kind of cute, so it’s a maybe.

Horror Tycoon: Again, different than I expected. I thought it was just, “You’re making a theme park attraction or something and your job is to scare the people and earn money doing it”. Instead it’s “Your entire bloodline made a deal with the devil and you have to build a haunted hous that scares people to literal death and collect the souls or you immediately die and burn in hell for eternity”. So it’s a situation where you kind of have to resign yourself to losing this game if the cops turn up unless you’ve walked a very fine line. So it’s on the wishlist, but it’s going to stay on the bottom even when it does come out.

Now I have to deal with the neighbours apparently deciding that the entire fucking neighbourhood has to share their taste in music. They’re 500+ yards away and I live on an upper floor of a concrete-floored block of flats and I can feel the bassline of their shitty 70s music through the floor. So you can imagine how it sounds. I have a headache (I blame Common’hood, frankly) and I would like them to fucking stop. Instead I’ll just find something to hyperfocus past it with, I think. Could be the Lost Valley campaign of Solasta; I started that awhile ago. Or poke at my Horizon Zero Dawn NG+ game again. Or just something hidden object. Or try one of the many, many unplayed games still languishing in my Steam library. Just with the pounding of neighbours’ music, I don’t know that I could focus enough to hyperfocus on a new game at this point. Why do they have to be so fucking loud?

[goldenretriever-nicknelson]

An elfish Christmas (T.H)

A/n: Happy Christmas Eve! I hope you all have an amazing Christmas/day! This is a fic i had an idea for and ran with and I hope it’s okay 😂 I’m also planning on a part 2 but it will be after the holidays so lemme know if you’d still read it. I also hope the read more works cause I’m doing this on mobile 😅

Summary: Tom Holland is an elf from the North Pole and he works on making wishes come true every Christmas esepcially for one special person. That is until they end up on the naughty list and Tom is determined to find out what went wrong even if he breaks every rule in doing so.

Pairing: Elf!Tom Holland x reader

WC: 1.6k

Warnings: none i don’t think :)

It was the most wonderful time of the year. The small village was bustling with people preparing for the festive season. Even the string of lights that hung on every corner all year round seemed to shine brighter. The villagers themselves couldn’t believe it existed once the snowflakes fell, and made every inch seem to sparkle.

Tom was one of those people, more specifically called elves. He’d been born here at the North Pole, and that’s where him and his family had stayed. Of course, elves always had the option to leave, but it was very rare that anyone would actually want to. At Santa’s village you could get christmas all year round, hot chocolate for free and by being an elf you got the joy of making someone else happy. That’s what Tom loved most.

However, elf training was no easy feat. Firstly, you started off making tiny things such as wooden blocks or acquiring something like legos, and then when you moved up to a senior elf you could do much more magical things with presents. It used to be easier, when all a kid wanted was a rocking horse or a doll; but now it was all about technology that only a senior elf could manage. Each elf was also given specific people to make presents for, the number of which grew as they advanced in training.

Tom was still only an elf in training, meaning that he was limited to what he could make and he was only given one person to make presents for.

“Y/n L/n.”

Tom reread her name off the nice list as if trying to commit it to memory. He smiled and his ears perked up, turning slightly red as he saw her picture. She was beautiful. He shook his head and quickly pushed that thought to the side as he read her list.

Over the years, Tom worked hard to make Y/n’s wishes come true and every time he succeeded. She made him smile whenever he got her letters of thanks or what she wanted for next year. He sometimes wished that Y/n could know who he was because he was sure they would be friends, but she could never know. He was just an elf, someone that not many people even believed in anymore.

Eventually, Tom’s hard work got noticed and he worked his way up to become a senior elf. He had been so excited as he put his new hat on with extra jingle bells and made his way to the senior elves workshop. As soon as he entered he was already rushed off of his feet by someone who showed him to his work station and gave him a high pile of papers.

“What are these?”

“They’re your letters kid, get to work.”

Tom’s eyes went wide as he looked at the large pile of letters he had to read. He grabbed a hot chocolate and started his way through them, his mind keeping a look out for the familiar scrawl of Y/n’s writing. It took him all night until he finally reached her letter.

Even though Y/n was older now, she still wrote letters to the North Pole and Tom liked to daydream that it was because of him.

He smiled as he read her list. As usual, her wishlist was full of books and some technology that he could finally get for her but there was one thing that caught his eye. Y/n had asked for her prince charming to find her with a “lol” after. Tom’s face contorted in confusion as he thought. Maybe she was asking for a disney related item or something similar. And what did lol mean?

He’d even asked his brothers what it meant but they hadn’t had much clue either. That was until Sam whacked his arm lightly and laughed.

“She’s asking for a boyfriend mate.”

Tom’s cheeks started to blush without him even realising. “A-a boyfriend?”

Sam nodded and looked at him almost in sympathy.

“But that’s- that’s not something we can do.” Tom stuttered, his brain whirring. He always wanted and tried to make those wishes come true especially Y/n’s.

“We can’t do everything.” Harry, his other brother shrugged, sipping on his hot chocolate. Tom sighed and shook his head.

“There has to be a way.” Tom spoke with such determination that Sam was slightly taken aback.

“You can’t make people fall in love.”

His brothers both gave him a look and he knew they were right. From what he knew about love it happened spontaneously, it was never forced or made. It definitely wasn’t something that could be made in a workshop. And yet, Tom didn’t give up.

He tried everything he could, read every book on the shelf as if it might help him on soulmates and love but he couldn’t find any solution. Tom didn’t know Y/n’s soulmate and it was so far out of his jurisdiction that he felt lost if he tried to look.

So when the time came on the day before Christmas Eve to finalise the presents, Tom sighed and wrapped up her other gifts before signing a letter. He apologised for not being able to deliver on his promise and that he hoped she would find her prince charming one day, whoever it may be.

Letters weren’t usually allowed from elves so Tom snuck it into one of her presents before finally delivering them to Santa’s sleigh. As they went off on the night of christmas eve along with the other presents he had worked hard to make and give, he felt a little tinge of nerves creep into his brain.

He hadn’t been able to deliver her wish. What kind of elf did that make him?

Luckily everyone understood why the present had been hard to acquire and put no blame on him whatsoever even if Tom did upon himself. Y/n was still happy with her gifts and Tom hoped she’d read his letter.

The few years after that followed, Y/n’s letters to the north pole became more frequent and were always delivered to Tom as if she knew him. It was like having a penpal, and with each letter both their smiles grew wider. Tom worked harder to grant her wishes and even snuck a few more letters into her gifts but he became busier and he had less time to focus on her. He had even got accused of favoritism which he needed to prove wasn’t true (even if it was).

His letter became far and few until eventually they stopped all together and so did Y/n’s. She even stopped writing her christmas wishes.

Tom was confused and upset, searching through his pile of letters again thinking he might have missed her but he came up short yet again. He asked one of the other elves who looked at him sadly.

“You didn’t hear?”

“What?” Tom asked, looking desperately at the elf. His mind went to the worst scenario and he hoped that you were okay.

“She’s on the naughty list.”

Tom’s eyes widened before running over to the lists and scanning for her name. Sure enough he found it in big red letters and underlined. She was on the naughty list.

Tom shook his head, feeling confused. This wasn’t the Y/n he knew. Something must be wrong, he was sure and Tom felt a determination to help her and find out what it was.

He went to his brothers first seeking advice. They looked genuinely worried for Tom as he paced around the room, running his hand through his curls and wringing his hat in his hands.

“What if the list is wrong?” Tom asked hopefully, already knowing the answer.

“It’s never wrong Tom. He checks it twice.”

Tom sighed and flopped down, pushing away the hot chocolate that Sam tried to hand to him. His brothers exchanged a worried glance.

He thought about the people he had known from the naughty list; criminals, bosses, even some world leaders but not someone like you who was kind and genuine. It didn’t make sense. Tom knew you deserved presents and love and he’d be damned if let this slip out his hands.

“I’m going to go and find her.”

“What?!” His brothers exclaimed, both looking at their old brother as if he had gone mad. Tom only nodded and smiled with a new sense of determination before heading off to pack. Sam and Harry both followed him, asking questions but he only assured them it would be fine and closed the door to his room.

He wasn’t sure what he needed. He’d never been anywhere other than the North Pole. It couldn’t be that much different, he thought.

Tom packed what he could think of; candy canes, marshmallows, some spare clothes, a few of Y/n’s letters, a toothbrush and a few other snacks to keep him going.

Tom knew he had to go before anyone could stop him or change his mind so he hugged his brothers goodbye and left a letter at his workstation telling them he was taking a few days off. He knew they wouldn’t be overly joyed and he could get demoted but there was nothing more important than saving someone’s christmas spirit, Samta had said that himself. And Tom wasn’t sure why but to him in that moment you were his priority and he was going to help you.

He hopped onto one of the trains that lead out of the north pole, something that senior elves could use for supply runs. He took a deep breath and watched the snow fall as the train began to move. With one last longing look he waved goodbye to his home and started to reread Y/n’s letters.

~~~~~~

Permanent - @eeyore101247 @geminiparkers @darlingspidey @ameelia @calltothewild @parkerpeter24 @rebekkah4766 @peaches-parker @tom-hlover @parker-hollandx @call-me-baby-gir1 @cosmicvibecheck @outshineallthestars @theliterarymess

Tom Holland ~ @teen--marvel @musicalkeys @spideyspeaches

[fangirl-ramblings]

Pairing: Arthur Morgan x gn!reader

Summary: A return trip from Annesburg is about to change your life forever

Word count: 1520

Notes: CW: vague descriptions of wounds | Unsure how to tag this right now, Amensia Plot | Unbetaed [Any feedback is appreciated]

Tags for: @husbandits.

I was so excited when I saw that I was assigned to be your Secret Santa this year (even if i do still have a request I need to fulfill for you 🙈) I loved each item on your wishlist, but this one really jumped out at me.

"okay, so there was a post going around like last year i think where arthur had gotten amnesia and the reader took him in, and honestly i haven't been able to get it out of my head these past few months for some reason"

I couldn't find the original post you referred to, but a rough idea started to form in my head...The only problem is, this idea is so much bigger than the stories I usually write and I was starting to run out of time to get it posted for in time for the @rdr-secret-santa event (as you well know, I'm a slow writer) so...please accept my humble offering of the first chapter while I try chip away at the remaining parts.

The Best Kept Memories

[working title]

Chapter 1: Late 1899 [Oct/Nov]

All this commotion was frustrating to say the least; you'd arrived in Annesburg late yesterday afternoon, ready to pick up the supplies you'd needed to stock your cabin up with before the weather turned back into the harsh winter the Grizzlies were famous for. Despite arriving in town a good 30 mins before the train carrying your supplies from Saint Dennis was due in at the station, an hour later you were still standing on the platform waiting for it to suddenly come rumbling down the tracks.

   "All the trains have been delayed you know" A local busybody informed you.

   "Yeah, I kinda gathered," you politely replied - not really wanting to be drawn into conversation...too bad the older lady didn’t get the message.

   "Talk is…" she leaned in close, as if she was sharing confidential intel that only you were to know about, "a bunch of degenerates living not too far from here, decided to rob one of the earlier trains coming up from city." 

You found yourself rolling your eyes internally upon hearing this; you were aware the Murfree Brood were a sadistic bunch of murdering bastards, but from what you previously heard about them, they could barely care for and ride their horses, let alone plan to board and rob a moving train.

"Terrible affair I heard, seems they managed to make it all the way up towards Bacchus Bridge before…" she stopped mid-conversation, not because she ran out of gossip to share with you but she had noticed that the tracks began to rumble and the sound of a train's whistle could be heard approaching the station.

   "Well, looks like the delay is finally over," you commented, pointing out the obvious.

  "Oh do excuse me will you." You sighed with relief as you watched the woman move a little down the way, heading towards the train's engine to see if the driver had any updates of the goings on in Saint Dennis to share with her.

By the time you'd finished loading your wagon up, you were exhausted and couldn't face the thought of driving home through Roanoke Ridge in the dark, especially if the Murfree Brood were still loitering about. Looking down the main street you saw the local hotel had some vacancies and made the impulsive decision to spend the night in one of the rooms there, ready to feel refreshed in time for your morning ride home.

While it seemed like a very good idea at the time, you soon realised you'd made a huge mistake. After waking up and having a quick wash before getting dressed, you made your way back outside to find the most peculiar sight. The mining town of Annesburg, usually full of workers with dirt covered faces, wandering about in their equally filthy overalls, was now overrun by well dressed men in suits. 

   "They say they're Pinkertons." You overheard the gossiping woman that you encountered the previous night, telling her newly captive audience. "One of them told me personally that there was a gunfight up near Beaver Hollow."

   "Well Eunice, I heard talk there was reports of those hooligans that they're after, fleeing into the night and the 'Pinkertons' had to chase them all over the Ridge well into the early hours of the morning," another lady informed her, looking super smug that she'd been able to provide some information that her friend wasn't already privy too.

   "Well either way, several roads around the area have been blocked off by the men in suits." Eunice huffed before walking off, looking for a less informed person to chat too.

Shaking your head, you dismissed their talk as nothing but idle gossip and jumped up on your wagon, ready to head back home along one of the roads leading South.

   "This road is closed," the well-suited man hissed as you approached the roadblock with your wagon. "I suggest you find another route."

   "It wasn’t closed yesterday when I rode into town, any chance you could let me go past just this once?" you protested, not really knowing why you were bothering. His stony face told you this was not a man who had much compassion for others, but wanting to get back home before the storm brewing on the East side of the Lannahechee river rolled in, you persisted, "I can be home within the hour if you let me past, whereas the other route will take me twice as long - not to mention those treacherous mountain roads I'd be forced to travel along."

   "I said, find...another...way" he growled at you, clenching his teeth as he emphasised each word.

   "Fine," you sighed as you reversed your wagon and drove along the road heading north.

Even though this route would take you the better part of the day to get home, you didn't mind so much as you could take the time to enjoy the beautiful scenery of this part of the country, especially the area around the huge mountain that rudely stood directly in front of you.

Taking a left hand turn to finally head southwards; you trundled along, lost in a world of your own as you admired the red wildflowers that grew in abundance here. Making a mental note to maybe pick some up on your next visit up here, so you could liven your cabin up, you were shocked when your horse suddenly reared up, whinnying a distressed shrill.

   "Hey now Ponos, what's to do with you?" you asked gently, hopping down off your wagon to assess the area around you. There was nothing obvious that you could see in the road, but out of the corner of your eye you noticed a flock of scavenger birds circling over something that must be hidden out of sight behind the giant rock to your right.

   "Trust you to be scared of a half-eaten animal" you chuckled as you patted Ponos' neck in an effort to calm him down. A beautiful Chestnut coloured Belgian Draft, you'd named him after the Greek God of hard labour & toil and while you couldn’t fault his excellent work ethic and seemingly unlimited stamina, you soon realised why the stable owner had offered you such a cheap price for him all those years ago; this giant of a horse was easily spooked by the smallest of things.

After reaching up to grab your gun from underneath your seat, you started walking over to the most likely spot to investigate. If it was a fresh kill you had enough space on your wagon to throw the carcass on and take it home to make a nice meal or two out of.

Approaching the overgrowth behind the rock, the birds squawked and scattered when they realised that you were about to steal the meal they had their eyes on. Getting closer, you noticed a heaped mound laying there. Your mouth started to water as you realised whatever this was, it was certainly likely to be bigger than a rabbit and therefore would provide several tasty meals over the next few days. Using the barrel of your rifle, you cautiously moved apart the long grass, almost dropping your gun as you finally saw what was previously hidden.

Looking like death personified this was certainly no animal, but a seriously injured man. His poor face, gaunt, bloody and bruised. Judging by the shallow, laboured breaths you could see him trying to take, he was still alive - but only just.

   "Sir? Sir? Can you hear me?" You asked, not really expecting a response but the almost corpse groaned and weakly nodded in response.

You glanced back at the grey clouds that had followed you on your journey from Annesburg, before looking back at this wretched soul. What was it your old pa used to tell you?

   'There's never any harm in being a good Samaritan to those that need your help.'

Realising that you could never let yourself walk away and leave a healthy man to be stranded in a storm, let alone an almost dead one to succumb from his wounds, you quickly set your gun aside and placed his arms around your neck. Summoning all the strength you had, you somehow managed to pick the sandy-haired man up and manoeuvre him onto the back of your wagon. 

   "I live a short ride away, you’re welcome to rest there until you get your strength back up.” Unravelling a few pelts you had stored with the rest of your cargo, you tossed them over the injured man to help try to keep him warm.

   "Sorry it's not very comfy but I guess it beats lying there in the cold waiting for the cruel embrace of death," you explained whilst taking out a carrot from your satchel to feed Ponos, in the hope he had gotten over his fear and was willing to continue your journey back home, “Tell me, do you have a name sir?”

Jumping back into the driver’s seat, you looked back over your shoulder, only to find your passenger had passed out.

[suhanisingh-blog]

I packed my bags and boarded the plane. It was the sensible thing to do, considering my 20s were moving way too fast and I hadn't accomplished anything worthwhile still. I felt this incredible anticipation to reach my destination and was delighted when the plane landed half an hour early. You see, I imagined moving cities would suddenly erase all that was holding me back. 'Onwards to a better life', they said and I hoped.

Stepping out of the airport, straight in the lap of this new city I could not help but wonder what the next year is going to look like. The thoughts in my mind ran through at 100 miles an hour- new people to meet, places to visit, local food to be had. And then the other kind, the slow thoughts that run like an 80s slideshow- the mortifying ones. Anxiety about making a career from scratch and living alone in a city where I knew not a single soul crept in.

The blank canvas that was my apartment stared at me. The excitement of finally having a place all to my own was immense. I could decorate it to my liking, give it a character it lacked at the moment. The 100 miles an hour thoughts again- Amazon Wishlist filled with home decor items, Pinterest mood boards, room transformation videos. Stubborn thoughts setting up expectations way ahead of any real work. I had always been like this- imagining the outcome even before I put pen to paper. Maybe that's why I was easily disappointed and lost interest in things when they didn't go a certain way, the way I'd imagined. But now, there was no going back. No safety net to fall back on. I'd come thousands of miles away from home to make a 'life'. What that meant, I still have no clue.

One week in and I was set. The Pinterest-y home was coming to life and I enjoyed my own company much more than I thought I would. Exciting days were ahead of me. This is all that I wanted. Or atleast I thought I did. Why did I have this stinging feeling at the back of my mind of not being where I belonged? I, somehow, loved and hated this new city. 'This is natural because it's your first time being so far away from home. It'll take some time.' I convinced myself.

It's been a year and I'm still convincing myself. I've grown to like this city but my heart still sobs like a baby when I can't visit home for small festivities, when I miss my favourite local street food joint, when school friends visit home and give updates about how our small town has changed. I have found replacements in this city for almost all the things I miss from back home. They still don't suffice.

Maybe this is what making a 'life' is. Moving away from home in hopes of a better future and then trying to find that same home in the place I ran off to. Yearning to go back but not having the courage to uproot the 'life' that I've created here because that'll just not be sensible. So, I wait for big festivals and important milestones to visit the one place in the world that satisfies my heart. Funny, isn't it? Now I desperately wish to go back to the same place I couldn't wait to get out of.

I have the outcome of my efforts in front of me and this time, I didn't run away. I made it turn out like I had imagined and somewhat made a 'life'. But what good is it if I'm still stuck in those slow thoughts that play like an 80s slideshow, only now the anxiety is about my home fading out in the background, leaving me all alone in this big, vibrant, city of dreams where my heart still fails to belong. Maybe this is what life is, an attempt at tackling adult problems governed by the mind, only to be defeated by the heart.

But don't take my word for it, I still have no clue what this darn thing is. I just wanna go home.

[mahou-queen]

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚lolita fashion then vs now: how the fashion has changed over the last decade ˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆

I started getting into lolita fashion in 2010 and so much has changed in the fashion since then. Trends, websites, community opinions, etc. So I thought we should take a look into the past and reminisce about lolita fashion since 2010~~

Everything below is based on my personal experience and perceptions in the egl community. These are not necessarily facts, and other lolitas may not agree or relate to everything stated below. 

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆

✿❀Rectangle headdresses:

At the height of 2010-2012 sweet these types of headdresses were not in style. They were considered ita and absolutely taboo for new lolitas. At the time the community was trying really hard to separate themselves from lolita cosplay and maid cosplay which were both really popular at the time especially at cons where a lot of lolitas would also be. In recent years with the resurgence of old school lolita, rectangle headdresses are back in style and I personally couldn't be happier as I have always liked them. 

✿❀Animal ears:

Also considered ita and taboo for its associations with cosplay. Today we see a lot of animal ears, particularly bear and bunny, sometimes cat but not as much. Even big brands like angelic pretty are releasing animal ears regularly. While they can definitely still be ita if they are costume quality or irrelevant to a coord, they are definitely back in style and looking very cute

✿❀Chiffon half blouses:

The 2010 sweet era was all about cotton blouses. And while cotton blouses are still alive and well, these days we have the wonderful chiffon half blouse. Very comfortable, more size inclusive, light and pretty. These were not in style/ not widely available when i first got into lolita. 

✿❀Low collar blouses:

Absolutely existed, but were not as in as they are now. Peter pan collars and high necks were all the rage, these days with the prevalence of chiffon blouses, we are seeing a lot of slightly lower neck lines.

✿❀Chocolate explosion:

Around 2013, it seemed like every release was chocolate themed. All these chocolate prints came out in 2013:

Angelic Pretty started transitioning into “sweet classic” around 2014 which was when I took a break from the fashion. 

✿❀Split wigs:

Split wigs were super popular in the early 2010s both in natural and unnatural color varieties. These day some people would say they’re ita but I think the fashion has come to a really nice place of balancing old and new styles so many loltias still wear split wigs and wear them well. 

✿❀Circle lenses:

When i got into lolita it seemed like circle lenses were almost mandatory. They were a part of every makeup tutorial, every popular lolitas coord, circle lenses were everywhere. I could never wear them due to my astigmatism so I was always upset about circle lenses. I am glad to see they have not been prominent in recent years.

✿❀Replicas:

It seemed like replicas were everywhere, everyone had one, they were generally accepted, and promoted by other lolitas. Dream of lolita was making replicas of all the major AP prints and filled the pages at clobbaonline, oo jia was a facebook based brand that made the most convincing replicas available. Replicas still exist but since 2011 major bans have been placed on reselling them and reputable resellers stopped carrying them for the most part. They are not celebrated and most lolitas are against them now. 

✿❀RTBU:

Refuse to be usual was a taobao reseller on ebay in the early 2010s. Idk if they are still around but i know they up-charged more than twice the price of the item. Secret shop tea parties were going for $95 on rtbu. They had hit or miss reviews and a lot of people didn't trust them. I never bought from them but i did window-shop

✿❀The only real resellers were clobbaonline and qutieland:

Clobba did not have a full website, only a gallery where you had to place your inquiry and order via email. These days clobba has a fully functional website with a wishlist and shopping cart feature. Qutieland no longer exists. These days we have seemingly endless taobao reseller options of varying quality

✿❀Egl comm sales:

I never figure out how this worked because lacemarket took over not too long after i got into the fashion. But it was an entire second hand market being run out of livejournal. It seemed very Intricate

✿❀Bodyline:

Ohhh bodyline in the early 2010s. The lace monsters, mr yan, the sundries department, the items never restocked, good times. I have 3 bodyline main pieces these days and I love them and plan to keep them for as long as i'm in the fashion because they are cute, comfortable, and the prints look good. There was a time in the mid 2010s where bodyline and people who wore bodyline were scoffed at and everyone who had only burandoo thought they were better than everyone else. But these days with the booming lolita industry in china (on taobao) and even western brands getting bigger, the emphasis on brand is becoming less and less and what makes good lolita is based more upon actual quality and coordination skills and less on the tag. 

✿❀My old dream dress list:

I never got any of these and many of them would never fit me anyway. I did get sweetie violet but in lavender as I no longer like the sax colorway and I don't know why I ever did.

My favorite lolita online at the time was @herajika-blog

✿❀bonus:

Sweetrococo.com, does anyone remember this place? You could allegedly design a lolita dress yourself with any colors/prints/images from the internet and they would make it for you. I remember designing a my little pony skirt on the site for fun and not getting it because it was $200 LOL. I swear that site was a fever dream. 

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚as we can see a lot had changed in the lolita fashion community and trends over the last decade. Do you remember any of these things? What is your experience? I really enjoyed this trip through memory lane. And while sometimes i miss the times when i was just starting out, these days the lolita community is so much more accepting, more accessible, and more experimental. It doesnt even seem like there are trends right now, just that any trends are ok as long as theyre lolita. What do you think?˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆

[starryevermore]

happy ✧ colby brock

pairing: colby brock x reader

request: 14, 11, and 5 for Colby:) by @rebelemily​

prompts: 5. “You make me happy.” / 11. “Why do you keep taking pictures of me?” “Because I’ve made it my mission to capture your beauty and I won’t stop until I have the perfect picture.” / 14. “Is that my shirt?”

summary: Colby spends the day showering you in compliments.

word count: 827

warnings?: just some fluffy stuff, my guy

Sunshine streamed in through the window into the bedroom, letting you know that morning had arrived. You rubbed your eyes with the back of your hands, a yawn escaping you. You, along with the rest of the trap boys, had just moved into the new Trap House. The move had been more eventful than you had hoped for, considering the pandemic that was currently happening. However, once you had gotten a little settled in, you began to really enjoy living with your loving boyfriend Colby. 

However, because many of the shops were closed, you weren’t able to go anywhere to buy decorations and, suffice to say, Colby didn’t have many of his own decorations before the move. So, you had taken to browsing online stores, compiling wishlists of items that you’d like to buy. Today, you were going to share the wishlists with Colby and pick out things that both of you would enjoy. In preparation, you had spent the entire night browsing the stores, trying to make sure you had made the perfect wishlists.

You looked beside you to see Colby sleeping on his stomach, his arms tucked under the pillow. You smiled softly and reached over to brush a piece of hair off of his forehead. He stirred slightly, but remained sleeping.

You closed your laptop, setting it on the nightstand, before sliding out of bed. You went to the bathroom and brushed your teeth before taking a quick shower. When you got out of the shower, you went to the closet to get dressed. As you were picking out a shirt, you noticed one of your favorite of Colby’s shirts was laying out. You smiled, grabbing it and pulling it on.

After getting dressed, you went to the kitchen to make breakfast. You browsed the kitchen cabinets, tutting at the few options there were. You’d have to run to the grocery store and pray they still had some decent food left on the shelves. There still was enough pancake mix to make for both you and Colby to have a nice breakfast. So, you got to work.

As you finished putting the pancakes on plates and grabbed a bottle of maple syrup, a sleepy Colby wandered into the kitchen. He made his way to you, wrapping his arms around you tightly and planted a kiss on the top of your head.

“G’morning,” he mumbled, clearly still half asleep.

“Good morning, baby,” you said. “I made us breakfast.”

“You’re an angel,” he said, kissing the top of your head again. He pulled out of the hug and his eyes settled on the outfit that you were wearing. “Is that my shirt?” 

You smiled and did a little twirl. “Do you like it?”

“I love it,” Colby said. “And I love you.”

“I love you, too, baby.”

After breakfast, you and Colby returned to your room. The two of you curled up on the couch together, and you began scrolling through the different decoration options that you had found. 

In the beginning, Colby was eager to give his opinion on what you had picked out. You had narrowed down a lot of options and found a lot of things the both of you would enjoy. But, as you neared the end of your wishlist, Colby had gone quiet.

You looked over to see if something was wrong, but was surprised to see him already staring at you. He had a dopey smile on his face, and you could practically see the love spilling out of his eyes. You couldn’t help but match his smile. “Whatcha thinking of?” you asked.

“Just how lucky I am,” he said, tucking a loose piece of hair behind your ear. “You make me happy.”

Your face burned and you were sure you were bright red. “You’re such a sweetie pie,” you said, kissing him.

You finished picking out the last of the decorations and then decided to go hang out by the pool. You changed out of your clothes and into your favorite swimsuit.

For the first thirty minutes, you tanned with Colby. However, it quickly got hot out, so you stood to go swim in the pool for a little bit. As you got up, you noticed that Colby had not-so-sneakily taken his phone out and took a picture of you. You smiled slightly to yourself, thinking of what a dork he was, then jumped in the pool.

After swimming for a bit, you started to climb out of the pool and noticed Colby taking another picture of you. You smiled again, and walked over, leaning down to ask, “Why do you keep taking pictures of me?” 

Colby gave you another dopey grin and said, “Because I’ve made it my mission to capture your beauty and I won’t stop until I have the perfect picture.”

You laughed and leaned down to kiss him. “I’m so glad we met.”

“Yeah?” “Yeah. You make me happy.”

“Hey, that’s my line!”

[mickeymouse-moshpit]

street lights, people

A/N: Hello, kind readers of this fic that I have taken entirely too long to update. I’m so sorry for the wait! And I also have to apologize because there is a whole first part of this that is stored on my computer, which is currently in the mail for repairs. I will post that part as well once it’s back, just please hold on and know that 1) there’s definitely context to being on Fennec’s bike in it and 2) there will be spicy things in the next part. Anyway, uh, if there’s typos I’m very sorry, and enjoy!

Description: Fennec and peds!Reader go on a date

Warnings: Some brief verbal harassment, brief description of dissociating, a little angst if you squint hard enough, Fennec and peds!Reader doing their thing 

Rating: T

Word count: 2.7K

January 24th 

Read part one here

You followed her out and down the lined path, hands sitting in the pockets of your jacket to keep warm. She threaded her arm through yours, and led you down the street to a book shop of all places.

“I remembered you telling me about that new series you wanted to read, something about gay witches? And you’re always talking about how much you want to go to the bookstore but you never do. So, go browse. I want to see what your process looks like.”

“Th—that’s really thoughtful. I don’t know that I really have a true process, but yeah let’s go look!” You opened the door for her, a light going on inside you as you got your first waft of bookstore smell: the paper, the ink. You got the first wave of the noise: the low music playing in the background, the people there talking in hushed tones. You couldn’t make out any conversations happening, could barely hear that there were lyrics in the music. You stopped for a moment, scanning the layout of the room. Your eyes landed first on the display of bookmarks and postcards, making a mental note to get one or two of each to remember this little town so you could find it one day. But then your train of thought halted: could you come here alone?

Best not to dwell.

Your eyes resumed their scanning, noting the different sections. You wandered to the right, letting your gaze drift over the painting beside the door. It was line art of two bodies intertwined, splashed with color to resemble a galaxy where they met. The notecard below it gave the title and artist’s name. And a price. You were struck by how nice it would look on your art wall. But that was for another day.

You started your first pass through the stacks, letting your eyes skate over the spines of the books, pausing to read the note cards when they gave a recommendation from one of the workers. Your fingers started to take on a mind of their own, catching on books here and there, bringing them out for you to investigate. Every couple of them, you would open to the first page, let the author’s words try to entice you. You put most of them back, but a green paperback one with a bent cover stayed behind. You held it close as you continued on, pacing with no purpose at all. If someone didn’t know you, they would think you had a system, but really you were just letting yourself be on autopilot. That is, until you got to the section that housed the series you had read about and wanted.

“This is it!” You hoped your whisper would convey your excitement to Fennec. You had been watching book recommendation videos and this series had come up, promising both a love story and adventure. “I hope th—they do! They’ve got both!”

You plucked both the paperback and hardcover from the shelves, adding them to your little stash. Your small smile would not leave your face.

Fennec watched as you dragged yourself away from the section, mentally patting herself on the back for this idea. You looked so happy, at peace. If she was a part of that? She would consider herself both clever and immensely lucky. As she followed you back to one of the sections you had drifted through, she watched your perusing turn into a hunt. You furrowed your brow as you sank down to kneel and scan for what she wasn’t quite sure. She pulled two more books from the shelf.

“Have you read this one?” She held up a copy of a book called Circe.

“No, but someone at work was talking about it the other day.” She hoped you wouldn’t be disappointed, and wasn’t disappointed when you slid the book back into its place with a mischievous look. Fennec’s mind went straight into the gutter for a moment, imagining you in a very different situation but with the same look.

“Good, you’ll borrow my copy.” There was no arguing, it was a fact. She would.

You stood up again, still holding onto the other book. You were off again, and while she thought you clutching four books to your chest was possibly the cutest thing she had ever seen, you were going to drop one if you kept getting distracted. When you stopped again, she held her hands out.

“Here, let me carry them. You use your hands to browse.”

You nodded once and sank down again, grabbing one of the recommended titles and popping up again. You paused, before setting it on the pile Fennec was holding, warmth building in your face as she gave you one of her smiles.

You set off with one more stop in mind. The waiting room library at your office was lacking in chapter books as of late. You let your feet carry you to the children’s section.

“What are we doing here? I didn’t take you for the Warrior Cats type. “

“The selection of chapter books in my waiting room is looking a little sparse here lately. I want to see what the kids are into so I can update the wishlist.”

Fennec looked at you like you had suddenly turned purple with polka dots and sprouted antennae.

“I have a bookshelf in the waiting room, and I always make it clear to kids and parents that the books on it are meant to be read, cherished, read again, both while waiting and when they go home, with no expectation of return. The Little Golden Books usually do come back, just like most of the other books meant for the teeny-tinies. The chapter books get sparse and don’t tend to come back, but I like it that way. It means I’ve got another reader who gets to learn about the magic of words.”

“But where do the books come from?”

“Well, at first it was just me. There were some parents who made it very clear when I mentioned the shelf that they were perfectly capable of providing their kids with books and how dare I assume otherwise. There were others that you could tell were extremely grateful. There were also a few that had a problem with it but not for any good reason but I’m sure you know what kind of parents I’m getting at.”

She did.

“Then one day I was in the little shop in town and one of the little ones who had started on chapter books saw me and ran up, telling me all about how she had saved her allowance and she was able to get the sequel to the book she had gotten from me. The owner of the shop heard it, and when I went to buy the book I had picked out along with some chapter books for the waiting room, he told me he would let me start a wishlist and he would put it by the register for people to see and maybe buy one or two.”

“Do you usually get what you ask for?”

“It depends on the time of year. During the holidays people get more generous so it’s time to update the list. Hence the reading castle.” You gestured to the structure before you, an alcove that had a castle facade and was filled with still more books. “And the wall of chapter books.”

Before she could formulate a response, you had pulled out your phone and started making a list. Fennec watched you with an emotion she wasn’t sure how to name. The earnest way you took on your task had her pulling out her own phone while you weren’t watching to send a message to the garage group chat. When you had finished, you brushed a hand over her shoulder as you walked by.

You wandered to your last stop: the display at the front. You picked out a pack of bookmarks that were little magnetic trees before turning your attention to the display of postcards. You chose one that was a picture of the gazebo in the middle of town at night, surrounded by twinkle lights with “wish you were here” in small text at the bottom.

You walked up to the register and Fennec plopped your pile of finds on the counter.

“Did you find everything you were looking for?” The older salesperson behind the register had half a smirk on his face as he queried you. “I haven’t seen someone quite as methodical as you, even covered the section for children.”

You weren’t sure if the sarcastic tone was real or meant as a lighthearted joke, but either way you felt your cheeks warm again, and not in a good way. You wondered for a moment if the ground would open up and swallow you whole. You felt Fennec’s arm wrap its way around your torso again as the salesperson started ringing up the books.

“Being thorough is one of the best things about her. And this is just me, but I think it would be kind of nice if my kid’s pediatrician knew enough about what their media looked like to be able to talk to them at their level about things other than their health.”

“Oh so she’s a big kid is what you’re saying? What, does she play with dolls, or are toys more for the bedroom?” That definitely wasn’t meant in a kind way.

Fennec’s arm tightened around you before you got the chance to just slip away and out the door, as if she knew that was something you might do.

“I would stop talking about them if I were you.” Her voice was low, had taken on a dangerous edge that matched what others saw in her leather jacket.

He got the hint, hurrying up with the transaction. When the final total came up, you reached into your pocket, not really feeling anything for that moment or registering the number that flashed in your general direction. Before you could get your card liberated, Fennec was already sliding hers into the chip reader. You wanted to protest, wanted to tell her it was too much, but the interaction was a sea witch that had stolen your voice and you could only look on as the books and other small items were wrapped and put into a bag and Fennec was turning you in a circle to get you out of the shop.

You weren’t even aware that your feet had moved until you were in front of her bike and she had distributed the books into the two saddle bags. She faced you and put her hands on your shoulders.

“Are you okay?”

You looked at her, answering her question with the question mark that had seemingly etched itself on your face.

“Hello? Earth to Doc? Are you in there?” She gave your shoulders a little shake, before she wrapped you in her arms. You finally felt like you could take a deep breath again as you rested your head in the crook of her neck, letting the pressure she was providing ground you again.

“I’m sorry,” you whispered into the collar of her sweater.

“You have nothing to be sorry for. He should be sorry. If he hadn’t stopped talking, I would have made him sorry.”

“I wanted to stop you from paying, it was too much.”

“No. I wanted to do that, it was the plan from the beginning.”

“Really?” You pulled back slightly, peeking at her, searching her face but not having much luck in the low light.

“Yes really. Now, I had something else planned, do you want to know what it is so you can decide if you still want to do it?”

You considered it, but the phantom hollow in your chest and the way your arms and legs still didn’t feel like they belonged to you gave you your answer.

“I want to know, but not yet. Keep it secret, show me next time. I’ve got my own idea though. Will you take me home? I want to show you the Books.”

***

You didn’t want to let go of her, but you needed to if you were going to go inside where it was warm. So you did. When she had taken the books out and put them back in their bag, you headed for the three steps that led up to the door of your half of the duplex. You unlocked the door, nearly dropping the keys because your hands were so cold. You caught them before Fennec could tease you about it.

You clicked on the light in the entryway, lighting the way as she took a few steps inside again. You took the bag from her, and nodded to your left. Behind the stairs to the loft, there was a doorway. You walked through it and to the right, knowing the room in the darkness. You stepped on the clicker for the floor lamp, bathing the room in a soft glow. You walked over to the electric fireplace that added some extra heat to the room, switching it on.

You went back to where she was standing in the doorway, like she wasn’t quite sure what to do with her hands. You took them in yours and brought her in.

Her eyes widened as she took in the space.

The room screamed comfort. All four walls were covered by bookshelves that reached the ceiling, with two interruptions. The first was around the fireplace, if you could even call it that. There was a painting in front of it, but her eyes were too busy wandering to take it in just yet. Her gaze drifted to the window, where either you or the previous owners had built a seat large and plush enough to recline in. While that should have been the star of the room, it wasn’t.

In front of the fireplace was a massive sectional sofa. She was sure it had to have a pull out option you were taking advantage of because it looked more like a bed-sofa hybrid with the way the middle was seemingly filled to the brim with throw pillows and faux-fur blankets.

You stood watching her take it in, as she eventually started looking at the books lining the shelves, punctuated by the odd piece of memorabilia. There was such a variety, all alphabetized, with the only delineation by genre she could see being poetry and prose. As she browsed, you placed your books on the window seat, and from under it produced two stamps: one to mark the books as yours, and one to put a place for people who borrowed them to sign. Others always asked if it was to make sure they came back, but you always replied with no, it was to make sure people could see if they had borrowed them before. You put the books onto the rolling cart that already had a small pile to be put away. Some of them were new, some you had reread and needed to return.

Task complete, you perched on the back of the couch to watch her.

“I should start referring to you as a dragon. You’ve got quite the hoard, baby.” Her words were quiet, wrapped with kindness. “It’s impressive. Thank you for showing me this part of you.”

“I just really like them.” Your smile was growing as she got closer to you. You stood and wrapped yourself around her again. “Does that make you the maiden in need of rescue?”

“Oh, no, you can keep me here as long as you want. Besides, don’t you know the dragon needs saving too sometimes?”

“In that case…” You paused, stealing yourself. “Would you stay a while? I can make tea, we can read, if you’re okay with you could do that pressure thing again?”

“You mean will I hold you close, let you hide your face in my neck for a minute again? Let you whisper things you don’t think I’ll hear but I will anyway?”

You nodded once.

“In that case, I’ll do ‘that pressure thing’ for as long as you need me to. But you have to let me try out this couch nest thing because it looks amazing.”

“Of course, but the first rule of the dragon’s lair is this: no jackets.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

More author’s notes: if you’re curious about what series peds!Reader was looking for, it’s These Witches Don’t Burn and its sequel by Isabel Sterling. She wants Fennec to read Circe by Madeline Miller, and she bought The Song of Achilles, also by Madeline Miller

Tagging: @phoenixhalliwell @promiscuoussatan @maybege @jangofctts 

[dmsden]

Even Better than XPs! - A D&D/RPG gift guide for 2020

Hullo, Gentle Readers! Well, this week is a 5th Monday, so I get to write a freestyle article for you all. And, with the holiday season rapidly approaching, I thought it might be fun to look at some new items that could be given to your gamer friends, or, alternately, added to your own wishlist so that your loved ones will stop complaining that you’re hard to buy for!

I will preface this by saying that I am not receiving payment or bribes from any company to plug their wares (more’s the pity). These are purely my own opinions.

So, unless you’ve been under a rock, you’ve probably heard about Tasha’s Cauldron of Everything. It’s a new D&D book that’s a huge rules expansion to 5E, and it literally has something for everyone in it. If you’re a DM, it has lots of new magic-items, as well as a whole section just for you on things like Session Zero, Puzzles, Environmental Hazards, and more. If you’re a player who’s about to start a new character, there’s tons of new subclasses, as well as the new base class of the Artificer. If you’re a player with an existing character, there are alternate class features, new spells, rules for things like sidekicks, and more. This book was a blast to read, it’s chock full of great art, and it made me excited to explore some of these options in my own games. This is my top pick for anyone who doesn’t have it yet.

If you have a D&D player in your life who also likes to cook, I’ve got to recommend Heroes Feast, the official D&D cookbook. If you follow my blog, you’ve likely already seen my photos of the food I’ve been cooking from it. Every recipe has gotten a thumbs up from me and my household, and I can’t wait to make more. It’s also got beautiful photos, interesting lore, and a section on libations both alcoholic and not. I can’t wait to do more cooking from this book, and it would make an excellent gift.

You’re trying to encourage someone to work on the campaign world they’ve been talking abotu developing for years. Well, you could offer a subtle hint by giving them the Worldbuilder’s Journal of Legendary Adventures. This handsome journal has a full year’s worth (365, yup) of writing prompts to get you to think about worlds, characters, and more. Or if you want to give something a bit more freestyle, there’s The Book of Holding, a 144 page hardcover journal. Either one is going to give the person who gets it a distinctive book to write and sketch in.

Gamers always need dice, and there are some beautiful sets out there. If you want to give someone a ridiculous amount of dice, however, maybe to jumpstart their collection, why not consider the Chessex Pound of Dice? It is literally that - 1 lb of random polyhedral dice. They aren’t the best dice you’ll ever own, but there’ll be about 80-100 of them, so they’re a great bargain!

If you have a Drizzt fan in your life, you might be aware that there’s a super detailed and articulated Drizzt and Guenhwyvar Premium Action Figure. This figure comes with two heads, two sets of hands, Drizzt’s signature scimitars, removable magical effects to put on those scimitars, Guen’s Figurine of Wondrous Power form, a cool d20, and a set of six artwork cards. Looks like a pretty sweet collectible!

Kobold Press is known for the high quality of their 5E hardcover books. Their latest monster book, Tome of Beasts 2, is no exception. I just received my copy, and the art and writing is top notch. It’s full of wild and weird monsters to shake up even the most jaded player, and, at 400 pages, it’s a hefty tome indeed! If your friend is a DM who loves hearing the players exclaim “What the heck is that?” this is a great gift. 

If there’s a youngster in your life who’s interested in D&D, and you want to give them a taste of it all, consider giving them The Young Adventurer’s Collection. These books are so much fun, and the collection is both a great savings, and it comes with a slipcover to hold them. This collection includes Monsters & Creatures, Warriors & Weapons, Dungeons & Tombs, and Wizards & Spells. Does yuour Young Adventurer have them all already? Instead, you could get them the newest book, Beasts & Behemoths, because every child should know what to do with the Tarrasque attacks.

For even more ideas, Wizards of the Coast has prepared their own gift guide. It includes home goods, games, family games, clothing, jewelry, and much more. You can check it out at https://media.wizards.com/2020/dnd/downloads/2020_giftguide_na.pdf

Well, I hope you had as much fun perusing this as I did compiling it. I hope we all have a safe and sane holiday season and make it through the rest of 2020! See you back here in a week for the last dragon of the year!