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#I mean Dream is JUST the center of his entire world
magnusbae · 1 year
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On the rare occasions when Hob is actually mad at Dream— he refuses to sleep. Coffee, energy drinks and the God forsaken awakeness pills? All fair game. If he has to inject caffeine directly into his vein, he would. Hob doesn't often get mad, but when he does, he likes to make a point. Dream and Hob match in more than one ways, really, they do. And so it is that the Dream Lord must come out of his realm personally to sprinkle sand into his lover's eyes because he'd be damned if Hob refuses his gift for more than two nights in a row. Not speaking for 100 years? Easy. Hob refusing sleep? Unacceptable.
#Dreamling#Fixed tags:#Dream creating Hob an entire GALAXY in the Dreaming to placate him but Hob has none of this— he refuses to enjoy it.#Dream getting offended that his lover does not appreciates his good graces is like— Well I can also give you a nightmare :|#And Hob just:#'Maybe just don't say that I will eventually stop loving you 🙄🙄🙄 Hob about that- huh.'#Dream: I meant not to insult you— it is merely how humans /are/. Most entities cannot stay with me for long. (The will not is unsaid)#Hob: You're such an idiot.#Hob would cross his arms and try to stay mad with him but he simply CANNOT.#Dream is being genuine— perhaps a genuine idiot— but genuine nevertheless.#He would sigh and finally come over to Dream and he'd take his hands into his and pull him close to himself.#He has to stand up taller— because here in the Dreaming his lover is taller than in the waking.#It's nearly at his tiptoes that he lands a soft kiss at Dream's lips.#Hob: Just because you had /shitty/ exes doesn't mean /I/ have to be#For the matter— I rather not be your ex at all.#Dream attempts denying all his exes being bad but Hob just keeps on kissing him insistently#Like hell he's allowing his lover dwell in the feeling that no one stays— EVEN IF HE DID SPIKE HIS ANGER METER LIKE HELLA#Dream: You will leave me because you're human Hob's anger: 📈📈📈📈#But he's not really mad he just wishes Dream to trust him is all.#I mean Dream is JUST the center of his entire world#but you know#anyways those tags are meant to be read separately I was just having some crack fun#the original tags gotten horribly out of order and were an absolute mess so I had to rewrite it for it to make any sense at all#so some of the chaotic insanity been lost XDDD#anyways yes XD#buns.hc
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byuntrash101 · 8 months
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incubus: coming of age
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fem!reader x incubus!san smut | mdni 11.3k being in love with your boss, doctor jeong yunho, is a nightmare. unlike this dream you're having right now of him gently kissing you in the middle of the night. but something feels off. doctor jeong doesn't quite sound like himself... nsfw tags under the cut
multiple smut scenes (2), demon!san (needs its own warning), the duality© of choi san he's cute and sweet then hot then even hotter, he's pouty and whiny and then a cocky little shit, monster cock!san (i mean he do be a demon tbh so don't expect realism), dirty talk (he's filthy), oral (f&m), eye contact>>>, breath play, overstim (f), multiple orgasms (he ain't no sex demon for nothing), slight dumbification, breeding kink, a sprinkle of spit play, explicitly asking for consent, pet names (kitten, baby, good girl), breath play, praising, begging™ (that's my brand baby), bulge kink, marking (in a quite literal sense), orgasm control, squirting, an ungodly amount of cum, cum play, lowkey wholesome ending <3 a/n: please enjoy this rework of an old fic of mine
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“Aaaah… Don’t stop” you huffed as you gripped on the bed sheets tightly “I’m cumming” you cry out through gritted teeth, furiously rubbing on your aching and throbbing nub. “F-fuck… Aaaah… Yunho…” You moaned, his name so naturally rolling off your tongue as you pushed yourself over the edge, finally grasping your orgasm and letting it wash over you in waves of heated bliss.
Once your sinful deeds accomplished, you sighed to yourself, lying wide awake in the dark bedroom, contemplating the blank ceiling as your bare chest heaved up and down. 
You did it again… You just couldn’t help yourself, you touched yourself to your handsome boss… Again!
You clicked your tongue, annoyed at your own lack of will.
Yunho was the head of the ophthalmology department at the KQ Medical Center where you worked. Doctor Jeong Yunho was everything a woman in her mid 20s, such as yourself, could desire. He was tall and well built, had strong broad shoulders that seemed like they could carry the weight of the entire world, he was unbelievably attractive with his big puppy eyes and a smile that could light up a room. And on top of that he was incredibly smart and a true gentleman, a wonderful listener, always considerate of his team and that smile! You thought again as you recalled how he looked fondly at you earlier today as you handed him yet another patient file.
As an ophthalmologist of said team, you worked directly under him. And God knew how much more you wanted to do under him…
You shook your head…You really had to stop dreaming about your married boss. Yes, he was married, happily married. And yes, your little thoughts and heart flutters were nothing more than that… dreams, just silly dreams.
You sighed and flipped to your side, tucking your head comfortably on the pillow to finally get some sleep. Not even taking the time to slip your panties back on. Simply buttoning your nightgown back up.
***
You have no idea how long you’ve slept for when you’re woken up by the sound of a pair of lips smacking and the feeling of the said lips attached to your bare shoulder. You blinked a few times, your blurry eyes adapting to the dark room solely illuminated by the rays of the full moon peeking through the blinds. Your eyes fell on the blonde tuft of hair occupied with gently nibbling on your collarbone.
“Hmmm… You finally woke up y/n?” The man lifted his head…
Dr Jeong?!?!
You flung yourself to the headboard, covering yourself with your blanket. Yunho was not at all startled by the sudden screech of terror you emitted and just casually joined you up the mattress. He leaned in and started to playfully lick around your ear. His tongue was surprisingly cool against your burning ear and the tickling sensation raised goosebumps on your skin.
“Aaah” A soft and unexpected moan seeped from your lips. You immediately clapped your hand over your traitorous mouth, refraining from moaning again. Your ears have always been your weak spot.
“Oh baby, you’re so sensitive” his deep voice resonated in your auditory, shivers running down your spine as you fought the urge to lean your head back to give him more access to your neck.
“Dr. Jeong,” you started, voice wavering before the tall blonde interrupted you. 
“Call me Yunho, darling” The pet name spoken in his soft sultry voice made arousal stir your guts around, the butterfly wings tickling your stomach as they took off by thousands.
“Y-Yunho, what are you doing?” You asked in a short breathed whisper, trying so hard not to whimper and, against all odds, succeeding. Yunho smirked, wet lips pressed against the thin skin of your neck.
“Come on baby… You know exactly what I’m doing” He marked a long pause to suck on your earlobe, compelling you to close your eyes. “I’m here to make your wildest dreams come true” Your eyes immediately shot open.
“How would you know about that?” You pushed him away to have a look at his face.
“I just do,” he shrugged nonchalantly before trying to go back to your neck, but you stopped him with a firm hand on his broad chest right between his pecs.
“There’s no way Doctor Jeong would know about that or even act like that at all… Who are you?” You asked, squinting as you grew suspicious. The man chuckled, incredulous.
“Y/n… It’s me Yunho your super sexy gynecologist boss”
Dread crept under your skin, you gasped loudly as you brought the covers further up your body… Doctor Jeong would never speak of himself as “super sexy” and above all else… He’s not a gynecologist!
“Who are you really?” you asked, tilting your head and frowning.
Soon the man dropped his shoulders and the fake reassuring smile, turning his face away from yours.
“Fine!” he spat, he got up from the bed and right there before your very eyes, red smoke started to form at the bottom of his feet, soon enveloping completely his big and tall figure. You rubbed your eyes, persuaded to still be in deep sleep, that was the only logical explanation.
When the smoke dissipated, Yunho was gone and there stood a boy. He had raven black locks of shiny hair perfectly sitting on top of his head, piercing and sharp dark brown orbs looking right into yours and pouty pink lips.
Well, a boy that is if you disregard the two obvious 10 cm (4in) tall horns that sprouted out of his forehead. And a just-as-obvious spade shaped black tail dangling behind him.
He was wearing an oversized black hoodie and a pair of denim shorts with thick white sneakers. He shoved his hands in his back pockets, looking annoyed.
“Who are you?” You asked again, this time more to yourself as you have trouble trusting your own eyes. The thing -for lack of a better word- runs his black stained fingertips through his hair.
“My name is San” he finally said.
“What are you?” you asked after clearing your throat trying not to squeal. San rolled his eyes and sighed deeply, his expression shifting from exasperated to defeated.
“I’m an incubus”
“A what?!” You nearly choked on your own saliva.
“A sex demon that-”
“I know what an incubus is!” you interrupted him, frustrated at the irrational scene taking place before your eyes.
“Well… At least I was supposed to become one” he looked down. You tilted your head in confusion. “Yeah… today is my exam… You’re my exam” You frowned your brows, the confusion thickening in your eyes.
“Your exam?” you echoed.
“Yeah, I was supposed to seduce you to pass…” Your heart jumped into your throat.
“Seduce me?!?” you said louder than intended, feeling yourself almost slipping into cardiac arrest.
“Are you going to repeat everything I say?” he snapped back with a biting tone. “Yeah… I kinda like… studied you and your preferences all semester just for today but it’s all for nothing… I’m going to fail anyway” he hung his head low, sulking cutely.
His words barely made any sense in your fuzzy mind. But then you took a closer look at him, he looked so sad, his cat-like eyes turned droopy, his lips forming an adorable pout as he nervously whipped his tail around. You immediately cursed your subconscious that decided to send you such a weird dream tonight. But the pouting incubus had you second guessing yourself.
“Well…I guess I can make an effort so you can pass your exam” His tail perked up and his eyes instantly lit up.
“Really?” 
You hesitated again.
“Y…yes” you dragged on the word, as if you were trying to keep the right of changing your mind for as long as possible.
“Oh, thank you so much!!!” he chirped, his lips stretching in the most adorable smile, making his sharp eyes turn into two small crescents. And you didn’t really know why but his happiness spread to you, you found yourself mirroring the beaming smile of the heart warming demon.
But something didn't sit right with you.
“Wait, an exam… how old are you?” you asked, uncertain again. San’s smile faded away as he tilted his head to think.
“Hm… You mean in demonic blood moon years or human sun years?” he asked dead serious. When you didn’t reply anything and only looked at him with round and confused eyes, he started mumbling to himself. “Yeah, how would she know what a blood moon year is…” he started counting on his fingers “I’ll be… One… Two… Ten… 19 years old in July” He said proudly puffing his chest.
“Oh my God! You’re only 18!!!” you nearly screamed, almost losing balance and falling off the bed. “I can’t I’m sorry, you’re way too young” San jumped to your side and grabbed both your hands pressing them into his black stained ones.
“Please y/n” he said, piercing cat-like eyes harpooning into yours and begging for your sympathy . “If I fail… I’ll be expelled from school and my parents will disown me… and…” he looked down at his feet, his grip slightly tightening around your hand, his voice quivering. “I’ll be prohibited from breeding, which is an incubus’ sole purpose” He hung his tails in defeat.
You didn’t know why or how but seeing him like that made your heart sink to the bottom of your stomach. You couldn’t possibly say “no” to such a face. You sighed again, it was your turn to feel defeated. 
“Fine…” you couldn’t help but to smile softly when you saw him wag his tail back. “What do you need to pass?” He looked to the side, recalling the instructions.
“For me to have just the passing grade I need to” he nervously licked his lips before looking back into your eyes “I need to successfully give you… one orgasm”.
You blinked your eyes twice, unsure of the information perceived by your ears. You started to shake your head slowly as the realization started to come clearer into mind. “Wait please y/n! We don’t actually have to have intercourse”
“Please don’t say it like that” you asked in a prolonged sigh, removing your hands from his to massage your temples, with knitted brows.
“Wait y/n! I mean… I could maybe… just…” he hesitated “go down on you?”. Silence fell for a second, but you started to shake your head again. “Please” he pleaded, getting on his knees at your side on the mattress, attacking with the damn irresistible eyes and pouty lips.
Silence again.
“OK…” you finally breathed out, getting up and pacing around the room. Once again, his tail cutely perked up. “If it’s a dream then I guess it’s ok…” you whispered to yourself this time your gaze drifting to the floor as you still have trouble processing what is going on.
Just a dream. You repeated to yourself.
“Oh my! Thank you! I promise I will make you feel good” your eyes shot back to him. It was almost imperceptible but the last two words sounded different. Something was different.
San took a step in your direction and you wanted to step back but the back of your legs hit the edge of the bed. You froze in your steps. He leaned into your ear and if you didn’t have your eyes to back up your ears on this one you would have sworn it wasn’t San speaking to you anymore. He took this deep, sultry, and alluring voice that only a demon could have.
“I promise you won’t regret it. Because I was trained for this.” You felt the unusually hot glide of his tongue on your ear as swarms of butterflies collectively took off inside your guts. “I was trained to please you… Only you.” Goosebumps ran across your skin as electricity sparked up in your core.
He went back to lick and suck on your ear you’re surprised how much surface his tongue can cover but you don’t pay that much attention to it, you’re too busy being gently laid back in your bed by San as he licked down your neck, leaving sloppy kisses and playful bites in his wake. His sharp teeth easily sunk into your skin and the pleasurable sting dragged a throaty moan out of your mouth. San briefly pulled away to look at you. He smirked at your flushed rosy cheeks.
“Baby, are you already feeling me?” Just as he said that he pushed his hips into yours and you had to keep yourself from loudly gasping when you felt… it. You haven’t seen it yet, but you just know it… That thing… was huge.
You let out a whimper and he unveiled his pointy teeth, the white pearls glistening under the moonlight. While San buried his face back in the crook of your neck you noticed how the buttons of your nightgown started to faintly glow red and in total stupor you understood they were undoing themselves. The straps swiftly slipped off your skin and you were left absolutely naked before San’s eyes.
He pulled away drinking in your most natural form while you laid on your back, thighs tightly pressed together.
“Baby you look this good, and you want me to behave?” he said in that voice again. He licked his lips, his tongue was different. It’s long and pointy, unnaturally red and… hot too… you recalled from the neck kisses. Your heart pounded in your chest.
He leans back again, and his disproportionately long tongue fully wrapped around your nipple. You moaned and bit your bottom lip. He lightly flicked his tongue. You gasped as it was gradually more difficult to resist.
He dipped down again, hot tongue gliding across your skin from your chest to your stomach and dangerously approaching your center. When he noticed you were keeping your legs tightly shut, he looked back up at you. Your eyes grew wide when you noticed the soft dark brown of his eyes was replaced by a glowing and ominous burgundy red.
“Baby, don’t make this harder than it has to be” San said, not parting his lips from your pubic bone still showering you with a thousand breathy kisses. Then with a flick of the wrist, your legs flew open, the magical force prying your legs open as if it were nothing, coercing you into unveiling yourself to the ravenous gaze of the demon. Before you could even realize it San was eyeing the most private part of you. 
And just like that the demon was at heaven's doors.
“Baby, it didn’t even start yet and you’re already this wet for me” his teasing made you squirm and it’s only then that you realized in what state the incubus has put you.
You were absolutely drenched. You never were this wet… Ever! Even in your wildest dream with Doctor Jeong. Without even proper touching, you soaked the sheets all the way through the mattress. You couldn’t see it, but you felt long strings of your juices linking your sopping center to the bed and coating your inner thighs.
When San approached his face very slowly, eyes focused on his target, licking his lips hungrily, when he’s right there, just a couple of centimeters away from your soaked slit he looked up at you. Sharp eyes glowing red and harboring a smirk that could only be described as downright evil.
“Oh, and y/n, one last thing. This is not a dream… It’s real… I’m real”
You didn’t have time to process the information before his tongue made contact with you, directly aiming for the clit. You gasped loudly, gripping the sheets. The sensation was unlike anything you’ve felt before. His tongue was uncommonly hot and wet, slimy even, like lubricated? It was also kind of rough, rugged, like a cat’s tongue. But strangely it was the best part about it, the little asperities were stimulating you in a novel way. You simply couldn’t hold back anymore. Frankly, you didn’t want to, you were giving in.
Your delighted moans filled the room, and your meek voice had San smirking, lips still tightly pressed to your folds.
“That’s it, kitten, moan for me.”
The pet name made you moan louder, your hand instinctively finding his head, fingers intertwining with the thick black hair between his horns and gripping it. His abnormally long tongue swirling around your clit, driving you to the verge of sanity. The pleasure rose steadily, and you felt the familiar build up form in your stomach.
He wrapped his lips around your swollen and very sensitive clit to give it a gentle suck. Another throaty moan slipped out your mouth which made you bite your lip right after. His sharp teeth grazed against you and you felt a small bite on your already aching bud. The sting was divine and made you scream out a moan. San felt you twitch under his tongue as you unconsciously buck your hips up and down, grinding your needy little cunt against his tongue.
“Kitten, are you gonna cum?” he asked with a mouth full.
You looked down at his dark red glowing eyes, his satisfied smirk, his pitch-black hair stuck to his forehead, his face smeared with your overflowing juices… Fuck why did he have to look so good?
You nodded, biting on your bottom lip so hard you could have drawn blood, feeling your walls flutter, inching so close to the edge, your peak within reach but San slowed down…
No… Please… 
You wanted to beg but you didn't.
You let out a desperate whimper that made San’s smirk grow even wider.
“Then tell me, Kitten. Tell me how good I’m making you feel. Tell me what you want.” he whispered in that deep voice again.
Fuck… How did he know you so well, the weak spot around your ear, the pet name, the dirty talk, the teasing? He knew about all the little things you fantasized about in the dead of night, all the details that drove you mad but never dared speak of out loud. All these secrets you kept for yourself until now. He knew your mind and your body. He had all the cards in hand and you were losing, giving up. But giving up never felt so good.
The agonizing slow flicks of his tongue on your throbbing pussy were killing you and you just wanted more. You needed more.
“Please, please San…” you whined. “Please, please let me cum. I-I need it so bad. Please”. you begged, your mind fogged up with lust. He chuckled in victory.
“Good girl” he praised before shoving his whole tongue in your clenching pussy. You didn't have the will (or the strength as a matter of fact) to control your voice anymore. You let your moans cascade off your tongue and crash heavily on the bedroom floor. The sounds were music to the demon's ear, the irrefutable sign you gave yourself up to him.
“Fuck… yessss…” you brought your second hand between the demon's horn to grip his hair too. Not realizing how harshly you're pulling at it, sting made San grunt against your heat.
“Beg me for it, Kitten”
“Please Sannie… aaah… Don’t stop… Please” you were pleading, you were so fucking close.
His tongue worked wonders going in and out of you at an astonishing speed, every time hitting your g spot dead on. Somehow, he managed to tongue fuck you while still give attention to your clit. Expertedly alternating between your fluttering and gushing hole and your touched deprived little bundle of nerves. 
“M’c-cumming” you whispered in a strangled breath.
“Yes, cum for me Kitten. Cum all over my mouth” San’s deep voice resonated in your ear as your eyes were closed shut. Your legs tensed up and your back arched as the knot finally ruptured, making you unravel at San’s touch. Juices flowing out into San’s open mouth. He sent you into an earth-shattering orgasm. The overwhelming sensation took over your entire body, making you shake uncontrollably as you screamed out his name. Never have you felt something like this. A simple human being would have never been capable of doing the things he had done to you.
San slowed down allowing you to ride off your high without hurry. When he parted his mouth from your quivering core you heard him swallow thickly then hum in satisfaction.
“Mmmmh… Delicious baby” he said wiping his glistening mouth and chin with the back of his hand, the glow in his eyes slowly fading to the original dark brown.
Your chest was heaving up and down and you still couldn’t believe what just happened. The things you felt you can’t really understand or even name them. All you knew was that you didn’t want to let them go.
San had already climbed off the bed when you let your heart speak. Or maybe the voice was coming from further south? 
“San…” he turned around “I-… hum…” you didn’t really say anything but San smirked. He clicked his tongue and shook his head.
“Is Kitten becoming greedy?” With that a red halo of light started to surround him and his clothes just simultaneously dropped to the floor.
You looked at him with round eyes and a hanging jaw. Who would have known he was hiding all this behind his boyish face? He looked absolutely stunning. You would have never suspected such broad shoulders underneath that oversized hoodie. He was toned and in shape. But the most impressive thing was without a doubt his masculine attributes…
His huge dick stood proud and tall. It was quite literally the size of your forearm and you just kept staring at it as it lightly twitched, precum shining and pearling at his slit.
You licked your lips as the sight made your mouth water. San picked up on your piqued interest right away.
He slipped back in bed with you and whispered in your ear again, planting kisses around your ear. He grabbed your face, squishing your cheeks in a firm grip, his black stained thumb tugging at your lips before he slipped his long tongue inside your mouth. Instantly the taste of your own cum spreaded on your tongue, lust clouding your mind. San continued to push his tongue inside, past the back of your mouth and until it was down your throat. Making your lips finally meet. Your eyes instinctively rolled to the back of your head, your mind slipping into some kind of half consciousness as you could only think of San’s plump lips on yours, only think of his tongue down your throat and the heat and the mess it was creating, both your saliva mixing and dripping on your chin. Goosebumps woke on your skin in the nape of your neck as his heavy breathing fanned your warm cheeks.
When he pulled out and you gasped for air, light headed from the burning oxygen in your lungs.
“I know you want more,” he said as he let go of your face to forcefully grab your wrist, placing your hand on his fat huge cock. The thing was so hard and hot, twitching under your fingers, you bit your lip trying to repress an embarrassingly needy moan and barely succeeding. San enfolded your fingers around his cock, making your hand appear so tiny in comparison to the huge cock inside of your clenched fist. He harshly thrusted himself in your small hand wrapped around his two big ones. You whimpered as San growled in your ear.
“Tell me what you want, kitten” San’s low grunts made you shiver, heat pulling in your stomach once more. He gave another powerful thrust in your fist.
“Please… San” you started with your lips trembling. “Fuck me” you finally said in a breath, barely above a whisper.
That was all that San needed. He left your side and kneeled right in front of you. He harshly pulled on your parted thighs to bring you closer. You let a whimper out as his member rubbed against your still very responsive clit.
He wiggled himself even closer and linked his hips with yours, his fat cock resting on your stomach.
“Look kitten, this is how full I’m going to make you” he chuckled, an evil smirk playing at his lips, slightly swaying his hips to rub on your nub. You bit your lip and lifted your head to take a look. You whimpered when you saw the angry red and leaking tip reach all the way up to your midriff.
It’s never going to fit…
He seized his thick member and started to rub the tip against your slit, gathering your wetness and coating himself with it. You bucked your hips up, impatient to be filled. But San gently took your chin in his black stained fingers and lifted your head up. Your eyes shoot back to his, the red glow was back.
“Look at me while I fill you up with this huge fucking cock” he whispered detaching every syllable of the three last words, eyes diving deep into yours. The smirk was gone, he was done playing.
Slowly and steadily, he pushed himself inside you. His girthy tip delightfully stretching your tight little cunt. You felt him progress inside you, surprisingly you didn’t feel any discomfort at all. Something of this length, of this girth, it should have hurt. But it just didn’t. Instead every centimeter felt like pure heaven as his glowing eyes locked into yours as he frowned and grunted.
Eventually he reached the deepest part of you and your hips linked again. You squeezed your eyes shut and your toes curled up… Because as crazy as it may sound just with this one slow stroke, he made you cum. You couldn’t explain it, there’s no logical explanation but you, a woman of science, you didn’t have a single thought anymore for logic. You only wanted more. More of this unholy pleasure. More of this demon, more of him.
You pressed your lips into a thin line to not moan. But San wasn’t fooled, he couldn’t possibly when your tight cunt was so desperately fluttering around him. He hunched his warm body over yours and leaned into your ear to whisper with the deep voice that you were starting to know.
“Oh Kitten,” he clicked his tongue with a patronizing tone. “You came with that?” He cooed as he slowly pulled out of your still throbbing cunt. “But I have so much more in stock just for you”
Then he stood back straight and took a bruising grip on both of your thighs to smash himself back into your dripping heat.
“Fuck” you yelled. Your eyes shot open as you cursed out loud, unable to resist the feeling. Your previous orgasm still hadn’t completely worn off and he was already forcing another one into you. Your eyes rolled back as your jaw fell open, shaking every time he thrusted his huge cock inside you.
San smirked when he felt the signature clenching and throbbing of your on coming high. But that didn’t stop him. As another orgasm washed over you, your legs shook uncontrollably as you moaned out his name.
“Aaaah… Sannnnn”
“Awww, you’re cumming again… Kitten really has become greedy” he chuckled slowly, adapting his pace to allow you to breathe. Your high slowly wore off. Your eyes came back into focus and you caught San’s tail lazily waving behind him before they drift to his handsome (but evil) face.
“Oh Kitten, you’re back! I almost thought you were going to pass out with this one.” he chuckled again, still slowly pumping himself deep inside of you. “You’re not used to feeling this good, huh?” You couldn’t even reply anything, your brain couldn’t process just one useful coherent thought so you just laid there trying to process the feeling but San sped back up, going even faster. Right when you thought it couldn’t get better. Right when you thought he couldn’t possibly fuck you any better than this… he does exactly that.
Immediately you gripped the sheets again, arching your back. You were already back to screaming for him. He felt amazing inside you. The way each thrusted into you to deliciously spread your aching tiny little cunt, the way he rammed himself into you, rearranging your guts and shaping your hole to perfectly fit his fat cock… Frankly in this instant you couldn’t even remember your own name.
“Fuck… Aaaah…”
The sound of wet skin clashing reverberated against the walls of your room. Finally, you felt him dangerously twitch inside you. He was coming close to his release, and it showed in his dark red glowing eyes.
“I’m gonna cum inside you” he grunted lowly, tightening his grip on your thighs. This was definitely not a question. It was a statement.
You welcomed his demand as it meant salvation to you. You were exhausted, your pussy just couldn’t take another one of these intense orgasms. You felt like you were going to collapse as you laid there on your back while he furiously pounded into you, your eyes rolled back and your tongue hanging out of your mouth, flapping on your chin with every thrust.
“Yesh, pleash cum inshide me” you mumbled, not even bothering to slip your tongue back in.
“I’ll make you mine, kitten” he growled, making you shiver.
“Yesssshhhh” you huffed in a shaky breath.
Your own release was coming close, again. Your toes curled upward, and you arched your back, your tight pussy frantically throbbing and clenching around San as his cock pulsed and twitched inside you finally releasing his delicious piping hot cum.
“Fuckkkk” San breathed out through gritted teeth as you sunk your nails into his biceps.
Gallons of thick white sticky liquid gushed out inside you, adding on to the full feeling of San’s cock. You felt astronomical volumes of cum filling you to the brim until it had to flow out of you in a slimy river of gooey white spurts.
You both caught your breath for a good two minutes before you could even move. When San finally pulled out your mixed juices still linked him to you in long strings.
He was quicker to recover than you. Your chest was still heaving up and down when he magically popped his clothes back on.
He looked back at you and the change in attitude was blatant. The glow in his eyes was gone, his innocent boyish expression was back, the cat-like eyes had lost their sharpness and looked back at you with a kittenish expression, and his smile? just adorable. Even his tail was cutely wagging behind him. Suddenly there was nothing evil about him (once more, disregarding the demon horned of course).
“Thanks y/n! Imma have the best grade ever. I bet Hongjoong had to keep the illusion spell…” He smiled from ear to ear, the shiny brown irises completely disappearing to leave two cute crescents.
Completely drained out you barely managed to simply nod back at him and grinned from the corner of your mouth.
“Anyway, bye… Kitten” he said, a playful glint briefly passing his eyes while the red smoke engulfed him once more.
When the smoke cleared out you were almost - not almost - sad that he’s gone. You sighed deeply, cum still lazily dripping out of your broken-beyond-repair hole.
How  were you supposed to go back to a normal life after that?
***
Well in fact… you didn’t. It was over a year later and San never came back. Every night you were hoping that somehow, he would come visit you again. But every night you laid in your bed disappointed, actually, even worse: frustrated.
Because after that fateful night you never touched yourself to your handsome boss Doctor Jeong Yunho again. Actually, you completely lost interest in him. Sure, he was still very handsome and gentlemanly but you just… didn’t care anymore.
To be clear you didn’t touch yourself to Yunho, but you still did have intimate moments with yourself… Well, you tried at least. Because nothing, nothing came close to what you felt when San took care of you that night. Actually, you knew no human being, no simple mortal could possibly fuck you that way. It’s not something a being of flesh and blood can do… It’s something only an unholy creature could do, something only a demon could make you feel.
So every time you succumbed to the urge of relieving yourself by letting your fingers play with your folds it ended in either, a complete failure where you couldn’t even drive yourself to your peak or, a lukewarm, disappointing and frustrating orgasm.
A whole year…
A whole year spent fantasizing about a teenage demon that only used you to pass a stupid exam then vanished from your reality without failing to completely shatter your whole world.
So yeah… it sucked…
You sighed to yourself, staring at the same old ceiling of your room. It was one of those nights where the tension was just too much, but you didn’t feel like going through the hassle of actually pleasuring yourself knowing damn well it was going to be temporary and frankly dissatisfying.
You turned to your side, determined to chase off the frustration by getting some good sleep. Exhausted you drifted pretty quickly into a deep slumber.
But the sleep was anything but good… You found yourself covered in sweat, wrestling in your sheets, engrossed in a fever dream. Not much of it made sense but you felt hands were roaming your body, an usually warm embrace was enveloping your form, you felt rugged flesh lapping at your ear. You heard jerky breaths, lowly grunts, an unnaturally deep voice talking to you…
Missed me… Kitten?
“San?!” you shouted as you sat up in your bed, eyes snapping open.
You looked around in a slight panic, your night gown clamped to your sweaty skin and your chest heaving up and down.
“Fuck” you cursed yourself under your breath, disappointed when you realized your mind played tricks on you again. You were just here alone in your room, soaked in frustration… and arousal.
“God damn it” you cursed again as you slipped your nightgown over your head and kicked the covers off your heated skin. Leaving yourself naked on top of your bed. Immediately the cold air lifted goosebumps on your humid skin, hardening your nipples.
You let your fingers slip to the crux of the problem. You knew there was only one way to finally be able to chase away the memory of San, even if it was only for tonight.
The cold fingers on your drenched heat drew a sharp breath off your lips. You were so excited about this stupid fever dream, so excited about him that only a few rubs already had you with your toes curled up in pleasure, fisting the sheets tightly.
“Aaaah… San” you softly moaned his name. With eyes closed shut, you tried to recall the way he felt inside you, the way his eyes glowed red, the way his low voice sent shivers down your spine…
Awww Kittennn~…
It was like you could hear him… you gave no rest to your sensitive and throbbing nub.
“San, I’m gonna cum” you whispered to yourself. Pleasure slowly taking over your entire body. You slipped a finger inside your drenched heat to aid yourself to your peak a little quicker. Then another one. You aimed directly for your sensitive spot and you felt yourself tightly clenching around your fingers. You’re so close… so so close.
“Aren’t you going to wait for me?”
This time…There’s no doubt.
Your eyes snapped open again as you stopped what you were doing and you were met with San staring you down at the foot of the bed, licking his lips, eyes already wavering with a tint of red.
But for a second you doubted. Was it really him? You can’t help but to ask yourself. He looked so different. Sure, the spare shaped black tail still loosely dangled behind him but other than that his whole aura changed. The boyish features are completely gone. Instead, his eyes and jaw look sharper. He looks broader, more muscular. His plain black tee is tightly hugging his fit and toned body, making it easy for you to see abs peeking from underneath the constrictive fabric, abs you can’t recall from the previous visit. His arms muscles were thicker, and a lot more developed. Along with his pecs of which you could clearly see the outline of under the skin tight black tee. His matching jeans let you see through their rips his smooth silky skin and generous thighs.
But the most noticeable change is definitely his horns. The cute 10 cm (4in) tall skin-colored horns were replaced by huge 30cm (1ft) long ones. They were directly sprouting in a spiral from his forehead and stood proud on top of his head. Their base was black but as they went up it faded to a dark and deep blood red.
Overall, he looked much more mature.
He wasn’t a boy anymore… he was a man.
“San?” you started hesitantly as the demon already slipped beside you in bed. “Is that really you?” you couldn’t help but to ask.
“Yes, Kitten… It’s me” he whispered in the low voice you've missed so badly. Bringing his lips close to your ear and you felt his rough tongue lap at your sweet spot, the familiar sensation drew a shaky breath out of you. For a minute you didn't say anything, you were just there, under his spell as he played with you. In the midst of it all, you didn’t even notice you were stark naked, or maybe you just didn’t care. You didn’t want to protest quite frankly, you let him do, you let him gently nibble at your bare collarbones and plant gentle kisses on your neck. You let him because that’s what you’ve been waiting for… For a whole fucking year.
But then you shook your head, snapping out of it. You left his side and get off the bed taking the sheets to wrap around your naked body and get up, knowing that his soft kisses kept you from thinking rationally.
“San…” you turned your eyes back to him “you've… changed”. He chuckled and the red glow faded to slowly disappear as he got up.
“Yes… I know, a lot can change in 12 years…” he casually said while stepping closer to you.
Wait. What?
“What 12 years? No, it was just last year” you corrected him, and he took your hands in his slender black stained fingers.
“Maybe to you. But not to me” You suddenly recall the demonic blood moon years he had mentioned on his first visit. Maybe that’s what he meant. “I’ll be turning 30 this July.”
Your jaw dropped. How was that even possible? But then again, here you were questioning the passing of time for an incubus. So what's crazier really?
“You remember what I told you about breeding?” San’s voice pulled you out of your thoughts.
“Yes… that it is an incubus sole purpose, right?” you said absentmindedly, still having trouble wrapping your mind around the situation. But you were brought back to the present moment when San squeezed your hands tightly and dived in your gaze with his piercing dark brown orbs.
“Yes, I came back for that…” he leaned in and you instinctively leaned your head back giving him unconditional access to your neck. San’s voice went down an octave again, lips only millimeters away from your ear. “I came back for you…” he whispered before he licked around your sweet spot, making your heart loudly thump in your chest and your toes curl on the cold wooden floor of your bedroom. You bit your lip trying to restrain your voice.
“I’m going to breed you” his voice was hypnotizing, “You will bear my children and bring them into the world” You couldn’t even wrap your mind around what he was saying, “I chose you, y/n. I only want you” His voice was putting a spell on you. “I can fuck any women I want but…” his warm hand was now wrapped around your nape, and the other one gently pulled on the sheets wrapped around your nude body that you let fall to the ground without resistance.
“San what do you mean?” you asked in a jerky whisper, only focusing on his hot breath on your ear. He ignored your question.
“I need your approval to breed you, y/n” His blunt nails grazed against the naked skin of your lower back, you started to softly moan, you were wrapped around his fingers, completely bewitched by his cat-like eyes fixed into yours. 
“So, say yes, y/n… Say yes Kitten” he said before his large palms groped your ass and pulled you against him, closing in the last centimeters that were left between his clothed body and your naked one, sending radiating heat from your core to your entire body.
What were you supposed to reply? Were you supposed to say "no"? How could you do such a thing after waiting for him for a whole year, everyday growing a little more desperate, a little more frustrated… How could you possibly say no, when his hands were roaming your body like they have always known you. When he whispered with that voice in your ear. When minutes ago, you would have given anything to have another night with him…
You… just…
Couldn’t.
“Okay…” you whispered ever so quietly, barely audible even for your own ears.
You felt San’s cheek lift against yours as he smiled. When he pulled back, you can see his pointy teeth glistening under the full moon, like they did a year ago. He was wearing the same evil smirk that you knew so well, the same wicked and devious smirk that he burnt into your memory a year ago, making sure you could never forget about it.
Fuck…
Right there something snapped, something changed. When San looked back the red glow in his eyes was more intense than ever, his expression was wicked. Lust dancing in his dark orbs as he licked his lips with appetite.
You didn’t even notice the red glow around your naked form before you felt your feet being lifted from the ground. San smirked at the confusion plastered on your face. His magic made you levitate and harshly threw you on the bed, almost smashing your head on the headboard. You should have been stunned but the scene taking place right before your eyes kept you conscious and focused.
The red glow now circled San and in a fraction of second his clothes were gone. Not dropped to the floor, just gone. They completely vanished. And he stood right before you in all his glory. You couldn’t help but to let your eyes trail his body.
His intense gaze, his sharp jawline, long narrow neck, his collarbones. The large and sturdy muscular shoulders. The developed muscles of his pecs and arms moving and mesmerizing you. The dangling black tail. The toned abs, already lightly sparkling with sweat.
Then your eyes finally went below the waist line.
You do remember the enormous… thing – for lack of a better word – San fucked you with last time. How could you forget? You could never. That’s why you know for a fact that this thing right there in front of you, rock hard, lightly twitching and oozing precum at the slit, is actually bigger.
Your jaw dropped to the floor. The veiny and pulsing monstrous cock was as lengthy as your thigh and as thick as a soda can. When you looked more closely at it you realized it was beaded. Beads of different sizes were visible, forming bumps under his skin that progressed down the shaft. Your heart jumped in your chest. Because you knew that huge ass cock was made for pleasure. Tingles started to bubble in the pit of your stomach, and you unconsciously pressed your thighs together.
San couldn’t help but to smirk when he noticed fear and anticipation swim in your confused eyes.
He stepped closer to you.
“Oh Kitten” he started as he crawled in bed to you. The wicked smirk still dancing on his lips, red glowing eyes fixed on you. “We’re going to have so much fun~”
Then with the familiar flick of his wrist your legs flew open at his will. You gasped in surprise. And San’s smirk grew wider when he noticed how your folds glistened with your juices.
“Kitten look at you…” He said, gesturing his chin towards your most private part. “You’re always so wet for me” his low voice sent shivers down your spine as embarrassment rushed to your cheeks. But the spell maintained your legs nice and spread out for him.
San leaned in closer to your drenched heat, sharp teeth on display and tongue out.
You gasped loudly arching your back when you felt his rugged tongue aiming directly for your clit. Still very sensitive from almost cumming a few minutes ago.
“Mmmmh… Kitten you taste even better than last time” he purred, lips pressed to your core, the vibrations sending electricity in your body.
San took his sweet time gently lapping at and around your nub to tease you, while cascades of juices flowed out of your impatient center. You can’t endure the teasing anymore, not after all this time, not after a whole year. You unconsciously bucked your hips up, grinding your pussy on his tongue while a tiny pleading whimper escaped your lips.
San stopped in his tracks. You were taken aback when the glowing red pair of cat-like eyes looked back up at you as he shook his head fainting disappointment. But the smirk was quick to return.
“Baby” his warm breath fanned your delicate parts. “Don’t be so fucking greedy” he said before sinking his pointy white teeth in the sensitive little bud. The sting pulled a scream out of you while you gripped the sheets. Immediately after San’s tongue plunged inside your hungry little hole, reaching the deepest part right away. At an alluring speed, his long tongue came in and out of you, each time poking at your sweet spot. Your loud moans echoed through the empty night, the familiar knot, quick to tighten again after this much teasing.
“San don’t stop” you pleaded, feeling your release coming in. San’s red orbs still fixed in yours while his tail lazily dangled behind him.
The incessant stimulation of your g-spot got you clenching around his long and rugged tongue while you finally came, letting go of the knot. You screamed in absolute bliss.
That’s it… this feeling… The sensation you’ve been craving.
“Fuckkkk” You cried out.
San parted himself from your throbbing center for a moment, allowing you to ride out your high at your own pace. Your chest was heaving up and down, sweat was pearling between your breasts.
“Baby, don’t think it’s over just yet” he said, smirking again. “I have so much more in store for you…”
You didn't have time to fully recover yet but San dove down to your soaked folds again, this time his hot and wet tongue only focused on your swollen nub. You scream out in surprise and pleasure. Immediately your back arched again.
His tongue somehow felt like it vibrated, the feeling was intense and suffocating, and you knew you would soon be thrown into another strong orgasm again. Your hand instinctively flew to San’s hair, resting in between his two horns, fingers harshly pulling at his luscious raven black locks.
“Is Kitten cumming again?” he said with a mouthful.
You couldn’t even process an answer as the crushing orgasm washed over you again, excessive amounts of your arousal coating your tights and linking your center to the sheets. You moan out without restrain, not making any efforts whatsoever to keep your voice down.
When he was done San sat back up on the bed. You didn’t even notice how he stroked his huge monstrous pole in his fist.
“Kitten, I hope you’re not too tired yet…” you jumped when you felt the unnaturally hot tip glide against your folds. “Because it’s my turn now” he singsang.
He shimmied his way to your parted thighs. Like last time he rested his cock on your stomach to measure it up to you. Now there’s no doubt the thing is much much bigger than last time. A year ago, it reached to your midriff, now the red tip is comfortably placed between your breasts. In a sort of trance, you wrapped your hands around it, the both of them can barely circle the girth of his dick. It was huge… Abnormally long and terrifyingly thick… but you couldn’t wait to feel the thing inside you.
San smirked when he noticed you eyeing his member with burning desire. He pulled his hips back and aligned himself at your entrance. His tip teased you as you bit your lip, gathering your wetness for a smooth crossing.
“Look at me Kitten” your eyes shot back to San’s glowing orbs. “Look at me while I make you take my cock” You let a tiny whimper out when you feel him pushing himself inside you. The tip gently and slowly parting you. San grunted in your ear.
“Fuck Kitten, you’re so tight for me baby” he breathed out in his low voice.
With every centimeter it got better and better, you don’t feel any pain, only divine pleasure. You felt each one of the beads along his shaft, each one more pleasurable than the last. History repeats itself as with this one slow introductory stroke you found yourself coming undone for him again.
“I’m gonna cum” you whispered in a strangled breath, your eyes still locked with San’s. His smirk grew wider at your frowned brows and trembling lips. But he kept on steadily pushing his cock inside you, stretching you further and further.
“I know” he whispered before violently pushing the last few centimeters in. The unexpected and overwhelming pleasure washed over you as you sank your head back in the pillows, a long string of moans falling off your lips while your cunt twitched uncontrollably around San, a satisfied grin playing on his lips.
“Kitten” he said while pulling back slowly as you were still high from your climax. “I don’t think you’re ready for me” You peeled open one eye with difficulty to look at him and nodded to contradict him. San chuckled. “You think?” he asked, pulling his dick out of you while your walls desperately clenched around nothing.
“Y-yes” you whispered, squirming, craving for him to fill you up again. “Yes, I missed you so much” the words rolled so naturally off your tongue before you even realized they did. San lifted an eyebrow.
“Really Kitten? You missed me?” you nodded again. “Well… you only waited for a year” you gasped as his hot tip circled your aching little nub before going back to your entrance. “I waited for 12 years” he said in an unnaturally low grunt.
He slammed his hips into yours in one powerful and shattering thrust which set you right back to screaming again. His movements were fast and precise each time he sent his big cock smashing against your g-spot. The pleasurable feeling was unbearable.
“San… Aaaahh…” you moaned his name, as you got dangerously close to the edge again.
“Yes, moan for me Kitten” he said through gritted teeth. “Am I not a lot better than last time?” he panted.
You couldn’t believe it but it’s true. You didn’t think it was possible but yes. He got incredibly better at fucking you to the point that you were ready to pledge your pussy to him for eternity. For him only. You’d do anything to be fucked like this every day until your body eventually gave out from exhaustion.
“Yesss…. Aaaaah… fuck” You shouted closing your eyes under the pleasure. Your loud and unrestrained moans made San smirk.
“You’re mine” he growled continuously fucking you deep and hard. “Fucking look at me I told you” He planted his black nails at the side of your face, making you wince and also open your eyes. The red glow was brighter than ever. “Say that you’re mine” he commanded.
“I’m yours” you whined locking eyes with him as the clenching of your cunt warned San of how close you were.
“Kitten, are you gonna cum again?” he chuckled, eyes locked into yours, furiously pumping his abnormally large cock inside your now shapeless little hole.
“I’m gonna make you mine Kitten. I’m gonna pump you full of cum. Do you want that Kitten?”
“Yes please” You begged in a short breath, your release getting dangerously close.
“Good girl” He grunted getting close to your ear, his rugged tongue licking the shell of it. “Now cum. Cum around my big cock while I fill you up to the brink with hot cum.”
The low whispers were enough to rocket you over the edge. You screamed in absolute bliss, twitching around his huge cock as you felt the hot sticky liquid rushing into you and overflowing out. Just like last time the quantity was inhumane, testifying of San’s demonic nature.
When San finally slipped out of you, you felt your heat meekly clench around nothing, already missing the way San’s monstrous cock was making you feel so full.
You were left completely dazed, lying on the bed, eyes still rolled back in your head, focusing on the fading sensation of your peak.
You didn’t even notice when San stood by the bed and you also didn't notice how, contrary to last time, cumming had not calmed him down. The thing is still alive and lively. In other words, he’s far from done with you.
“Kitten, I’m gonna fuck your face now” he announced.
You didn’t have time to process the meaning of those words that you were being pulled by your arm. Your body was lying across the bed while your head was resting upside down on the edge of the mattress.
“Open wide Kitten” San’s hot and wet tip brushed against your lips. Almost out of instinct you opened your mouth.
San pressed himself inside your narrow mouth. The stretch was borderline unbearable, San’s cock was too big. Way too big for your tiny mouth and you barely managed to take the head of his dick inside your crowded wet hole. San grunted loudly, indulging in the feeling of stretching your lips to his convenience.
“Fuckkkk… y/n”
When he reached the back of your throat he started to slowly pull out, taking his cock completely out. You ceased the opportunity to take a deep breath. And that proved to be the right move, because seconds later San went back inside you but with much less tenderness. He placed both of his hands on your cheeks gripping your face tightly to aid himself with intruding your mouth.
He had no mercy for your poor sore throat, his powerful thrust silencing you except for the wet and sloppy sounds that your mouth emitted.
“How does your cum and mine taste like Kitten?”
His voice sent shivers across your skin, your eyes rolled back as your pained pried open jaw gradually went numb. You wanted to scream how good he tasted on your tongue but you couldn’t. You wanted more, more of this intoxicating taste taking over your mouth and clouding your mind.
“Fuckkkk… Kitten… You’re gonna make me cum” He whispered, his voice conveying the feeling of his incoming orgasm. “I’m gonna cum in your mouth baby. Want that Kitten?” You only produced a gargled moan and San knew how eager you truly were to taste more of him.
“Such a good girl for me”
Only instants after you felt the stream of his warm load shoot to the back of your throat, instantly filling your mouth. Squirts after squirts of cum crashed on the inside of your cheeks and on your tongue, some even slipped out of your mouth and lazily dripped down to your cheeks and forehead.. The bitter taste invades you and your entire body, making you dizzy, light headed.
When San pulled out you hurriedly swallowed a big mouthful of thick and hot cum before drawing a sharp -and much needed- breath.
San gently stroked your cum and spit covered cheeks.
“You’re such a good girl for me Kitten” he said before laying back on the bed, his back against the headboard. And your eyes went wide with stupor when you noticed that still. The monster has not calmed down. His cock is still hard, pumped full of burning blood, tip a shade of angry red and profusely leaking at the slit.
You felt exhausted and drained out by all the orgasms you failed to count. You couldn’t even lift a single muscle even if you tried.
But you didn’t have to because once again your body was enveloped by a red glowing light. With that you were lifted in the air. San’s magic spreading your legs into an impressive split, suspended in the air above him while he patiently waited for you to come down on him with his hands behind his head.
Beads of sweat formed on his chest and rolled down his toned abs. Sweat also stuck his bangs to his forehead and his horns. He was absolutely gorgeous, the kind of beauty that nobody would ever be able to turn down… and especially not you.
And unlike you, he looked everything but tired.
Slowly his magic lowered you down. You gasped when his hot tip brush against your drenched folds.
“I just need more of you, Kitten. Can you handle me?”
You wanted to respond but you were unable to think of anything coherent as, already, the steady descent had you stretched out around his girth and completely cock dumb. You only whimper meekly for a response. Slowly but surely San set you down on his cock, cunt perfectly angled with his huge dick. Each centimeter, each bead going inside you, making your body tense up with agonizing pleasure.
When you were halfway through the red light around your body went off and he dropped you to take the rest of him in one go. And it was just too much for you. The way his cock smashed into your sensitive sweet spot while San had his glowing red orbs fixed on the place your bodies met sent you into the abyss again. This time the pleasure was so intense that not only your needy cunt absolutely crushed San’s cock with a vice grip and uncontrollable spasms but also gushed out juices in powerful clear streams, drenching San’s muscular torso. San smirked as he clicked his tongue and shook his head.
“Kitten… You came again with the very first stroke” he said, fainting disappointment, taking pleasure in seeing you struggle above him, shaking uncontrollably, eyes rolled back, jaw hanging open and toes curled up.
Before you could even go back to your senses, you felt yourself getting lifted again and the red glow came back around your figure. You whimpered as you felt San slide out of you. But right before the tip popped out, he smashed you back onto him. You arched your back as a delighted long string of moans escaped your lips.
“Damn Kitten you’re so tight” San said through gritted teeth.
You couldn’t even say anything back as he’s already lifting you up with his magic. Each time he increased the pace until he had you jumping up and down his girth. The familiar knot tightened again.
“How good does my cock feel baby?” San asked his red eyes fixed on you as he made your breasts bounce on your chest with each back and forth.
“It’s the b-best…. San it’s the best thing ever. F-fuck! Wanna be fucked like this every day” you answered, struggling with your words, mushing them together. Visibly, it was what San wanted to hear as the evil twinkle in his eye intensified.
“Yeah Kitten? You want that, huh?” he grunted in the low voice you loved so much, sending swarms of butterflies flying in your stomach. He went faster again. The wet sounds of skin clashing bounced off the walls punctually interrupted by San’s and your moans.
“I’m gonna c-” You wanted to announce but San interrupted you.
“Not yet Kitten, this time you’ll cum with me and when I tell you to” He lifted you again, making you hover over his dick. Still, just above him. You squirmed only wanting to be filled again.
“Say what you want Kitten”
“Want your cock Sannie” he raised his eyebrow. “Pleasepleasepleaseplease” you begged, your pleas making him smirk again.
“Yeah baby? Is that what you want?” he said as he slipped the tip inside, the beaded shaft made you scream in bliss as San slowly lowered you on his cock, legs spread wide, offering him the best view on your cunt, your swollen clit hard and red and the shapeless entrance drooling and pulsing, aching to be filled again.
“Yessssss” you screamed while tears welled up in the corner of your eyes.
But then San’s spade shaped tail swiftly wrapped around your neck, the slick scales gliding on your skin send goosebumps in the nape of your neck. When the tail had made a full circle around your neck, San suddenly tightened the grip.
“Then fucking take it” he smashed you onto his huge cock.
You opened your mouth to scream but not a sound came out. You were completely silenced. Only the wet and lewd sounds of your pussy could be heard as San’s tip touched the deepest part of you, forming a visible bulge inside your stomach. Tears of pure joy rolled down your burning cheeks.
San then went back to this unforgiving rhythm. Every time angling you just right to smash your sensitive spot. Gradually your mind went blank as he fucked you furiously, your jaw hung open and your eyes rolled back into their orbit.
“Look at me” San whispered in his demonic low voice. Your eyes came back into focus and snapped to him. “I’m gonna cum inside you” he continued to whisper. You nodded vigorously, knowing it meant he’ll finally let you cum too. 
“With this one I’ll make you mine. I will pump you full of my seed and impregnate you. I’ll make your belly swell with my cum and have you bear my progeny” You nodded again, streams of tears wetting your heated cheeks. The restriction of blood to your brain fogged your vision with specks of white, making  you see stars as the pleasure rose again to an unbearable level.
“Now cum. Cum for me Kitten” San grunted.
You felt his cum flow into you, and that sent you over the edge into the most intense orgasm you ever felt, that’s including the ones San gave you in the past. This one was different. His big fat cock smashing into you, his glistening chest drenched with his sweat and your cum, the dirty talk, the pet name, the commanding tone, the low voice, the tail around your neck, the thick and hot cum filling you up. It was all too much.
Your spread out legs tensed up and shook uncontrollably as San led you to completion. Just as you were on the verge of losing consciousness due to the air restriction and the heavenly stimulation of your orgasm, San loosened his tail around your narrow neck. A strangled moan escaped free of your sore throat as you were finally able to vocally express the immense pleasure you felt.
“Yes, that’s it, baby” San purred. “Scream for me”. He kept you going up and down his length for a while longer.
You cried out a long moan as your head was thrown back and your tongue hung loose out of your mouth. San slowly decreased the pace until it came to a stop. He lifted you out one last time, as soon as his big member popped out of you, gallons of his cum flowed out of your tired and stretched out hole. San laid you down gently next to him. Before linking his lips with yours and shoving his long and rugged tongue inside your mouth while you didn’t notice the red glow marking you in the lower stomach region.
You laid there for you didn’t know how long, trying to gather your thoughts. You were completely drained, fucked beyond repair…
After a while San stood back up.
“In three weeks, the children will be born” you pelled open your eyes to look at him. “I’ll be back to take them… and you.”
What?!?
“Wait… me? Also babies? Plural?” so many questions shot through your mind.
“Yes” San said as he wiped himself with a piece of cloth he found. “I marked you as mine” It’s only now that you noticed the small obscure and cryptic symbol San engraved on the skin of your pubic bone with his demonic magic. The character seemed to be a language you can’t comprehend.
“What is this?” you asked, pointing to the tattoo.
“It means you are to be my wife”. Your eyes nearly bulged out of their sockets.
“WHAT?” 
“Yes, you know what a succubus is right, a female incubus? ” you noded, unable to speak one more word.
“Well, succubus aren’t born. Succubus are made. They are human women chosen by incubus to become their wife and bring their heirs to the underworld.”
You wanted to say something, but you only stuttered nonsense.
“Over the course of the next three weeks you will kiss your humanity goodbye. Horns will sprout out your forehead and you will grow a tail. Your magic energy will increase, and you will slowly be able to use different magic spells. In three weeks, I’ll bring you back to the underworld with me, where you will live with me. And serve me with your body…” San marked a silence “and heart.”
“But… you… I-” San sat next to you on the edge of the bed and cupped your cheeks to make your troubled eyes meet his.
“Isn’t that what you asked for?” He asked, there was nothing left of the deep voice, instead he spoke softly, his dark orbs fixed into your unsure gaze. He brushed his thumb over your bottom lip “Right, Kitten?”
“Yes…” you whispered, bewitched by his intense stare.
“Over the past year, your feelings for me bloomed, didn’t they?” You felt blood rushing to your cheeks as San’s gaze was unwavering, sharp cat-like eyes piercing right through you and touching your soul. 
You didn’t answer anything, but you didn’t have to. San knew exactly how to read you. His eyes started to glow again, along with the symbol marked on your skin. And you were enveloped in his light. You felt like your soul was being bound to this creature, almost morphing with him. The bond was pure and benevolent. And real. From now on you were his and he was yours.
He got back up and magically summoned more clothes from thin air. Red smoke started to appear at his feet, gradually growing around him.
“I’ll be back in three weeks. Wait for me, Kitten, okay?” He said with that adorable boyish smile you haven’t seen in a year, he winked at you before disappearing in the red smoke.
You rubbed over the tattoo and over your belly, where life had taken its domain. This time, you wouldn’t have to try to go back to your normal life.
It was impossible anyway… and frankly you didn’t want to.
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a/n: so how was it? how was demon san? as a proud member of demon line i thought the concept suited him hehe. dont hesitate to tell me if you liked it. that would make me so happy <3
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controld3vil · 25 days
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atreides and bene gesserit
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pairing(s): dune 2 cast x actor!reader (platonic), austin butler x actor!reader
synopsis: requested by this ask!
⤷ alt: as clueless as you were about your sister's role, it brought you much surprise and joy to see her on the same carpet as you.
notes: reader uses fem pronouns as she's playing a role as a bene gesserit. reader is also described as wearing a sleeveless jumpsuit. and i really enjoyed lea seydoux's performance and hope to see more of it !! this is also COMPLETELY separate from the first two posts ive made since the readers r playing different characters yeah?
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When Denise Villeneuve asked you about the role of Lady Margot Fenring, you were genuinely shocked about his decision. You appreciated his works but have never gotten close to any of his sets before. You have worked with directors who've admired Villeneuve for his imaginative mind. And now, you witnessed his creativity in person for the first time.
The role was small and not as significant as the other main leads. Regardless, your character was just as enigmatic and complex as any other in the Dune franchise. Even though your time was short, it was a fun experience to learn and observe from. You weren't able to meet the entire cast after production, but with the NYC premiere, you were able to link up again.
You heard your name being called out. "Hello! How are you?" The well-known comedian and presenter by the name of Amelia Dimonberg was now beside you. In her jet-black corset dress, her style is chic and elegant. She hands you a microphone with the film's title plastered on it. "You look beautiful!"
"Thank you!" you sweetly recuperate, diverting your shoulders to the sight, cutely. You give a little pose before complimenting her own outfit. "You as well!"
"Do you have a memorable day on set that sticks out to you?" Amelia questions, subtly leaning toward your direction. And now you noticed her detailed eye makeup which enhances her outfit altogether.
"Well- I've had, like, only a few days," You let out a quick sigh. Truly it was nothing to be embarrassed about but you could not help but feel shy about it.
"Mmhmm! So all of them?"
"Yeah, all of them!" With ease, your shyness turns into giddy laughter as all you remember from your times on set. Recalling those tiny moments brought a small smile to your face. "Every day counted for me and that was enough."
"Oh absolutely!" Amelia chides, nodding in agreement. She quickly then moves onto the next question, "How long do you think you could last in the actual desert?"
"Oo that's a tough question," Lifting your fingers to rest on your chin as you try to contemplate an answer. "Ideally no- I feel like I could never recover from the heat."
"Yes yes, the heat's very intense,"
"Yeah- no I don't think I'd ever leave my house for that-" You shake your head nonchalantly, acknowledging how most of your scenes already were indoors. You could imagine how you would do in the desert of Abu Dhabi. It makes you appreciate the cast and crew even more for their effort to make filming more comforting and tolerable.
"Where would be your dream location to hang out? I'm assuming your home then since you prefer to say inside?" The blonde interviewer quickly catches on, eyebrows raising intrigued by your response.
Instead, you hummed bashfully, "Actually I think an oasis would be nice." The camera catches onto Amelia's face, fully fixated on you. "Which fits perfectly if I were to live in the desert actually!"
"Mm yeah, smart choice!" She responds more cheerily. "You can maybe go for a swim, you know-"
"Right right," You give her an playful look, "And you don't have to go thirsty!"'
"Absolutely, the best of both worlds," Amelia chirps, doing the same expression. "So this film centers a lot around dreams. Do you have vivid dreams of yourself?"
"Yes! I've uh- I've had many dreams of myself. I mean, this one, for example-" You turn to the camera, waving with the most adorable smile on your face. "'I'm living my dream right now!"
"You're living your dream right now!"
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In another section of the premiere, you were walking down the carpet for press interviews and photography. The set where the premiere was taking place was gorgeously made in the shades of black and orange, the perfect theme of the film. The entire venue was outdoors, allowing you to feel the cold air and be more at ease in the crowded space. There were more paparazzi than you had expected, and you suddenly became aware that you were alone. Without any friend or acquaintance to accompany by, you searched aimlessly for a familiar face.
Then there was a holler. And then multiple more came after, it made you confused really. Your head swerves to the sound of the person you so try to look for and immediately you're struck in awe.
"Anya?!" In an instant, you're seen running towards your sister in the far back of the premiere wall. People were reluctantly used to fast-paced relocations around the carpet. Therefore most did not mind your hasty stumbles through the crowd. It was almost comical how apparent your demeanor changed when you heard her, in fact, videos and pictures caught all of it.
"Hi!" She beams in her white dress robe. Her makeup was glowing, making her skin seem angelic, and sheer without impurities. Her outfit covers her like a nun, covering her head and body in almost transparent cloth. Yet it flows around her so elegantly, almost like she was an angel from the stars. She squeezes your figure firmly, only after releasing to gush about your appearance.
You adored a beige sleeveless jumpsuit. The color is complimented with tiny designs of sparkle. Its seams captured your figure perfectly, as you also wore a gold chain and bulky rings. From the lighting, it looks as though your outfit is shining. And to be completely honest, you prefer comfort over the judging looks of fashion critics. Therefore you wanted to wear something that you could still move comfortably in. Thus you were able to run over to your sister with ease.
Through the other lens and camera, they could pick up some of her words after. "You look so gorgeous! How are you here?!" Anya's expression changes into a perplexed one as she gets a hold of your shoulders, shaking them back and forth.
"I was invited obviously, "You said, mimicking her voice while holding onto her arms on yours. "You didn't tell me you were a part of Dune!" Viewers from afar could tell you were pushing an act, reacting as though you were petrified about how Anya managed to be here in the first place.
"I didn't know you were either!" She giggled, closing in on your right ear. Your sister whispers to you slowly, trying to withdraw from the camera and recordings. "Villeneuve had mentioned something but honestly I just thought it was a joke."
It was your turn to guff. Your mouth opens wide flabbergasted, looking sarcastically offended. "Why would you think he's joking?!"
Anya scoffs lightly, wanting to go further with the joke. "I don't know- I just didn't take his word seriously,"
"Why? Because you didn't think I'd make it into the film?" You accused, eyes widening with a hand over your heart. "You're so cruel."
"So cruel," She smirks up at you, then moves back to be by your side. You see her face forward the flashing cameras, as you do the same. "Come! Let's take some pictures!"
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"Your outfit looks beautiful by the way!" Anya Taylor muses, eyeing down at the fine details on your jumpsuit. "It's very... you!"
You give her a nod, before flattening some of the creases, "I thought this color was so exquisite, so I thought it would be perfect for the premiere." You lift your head to look at your sister, before realizing behind her, the upcoming stars of the film were getting ready to take cast photos. "Oh Anya- I think you should go!"
Your sister turns and then gazes back at you with a soft smile. "You should come with me!"
The thunder of cameramen and journalist blurred your focus for a moment. "Are you sure-"
Again the sound of your name is hurdled but this time from someone you haven't seen in a long time. Jessica Ferguson, who too wears a black body suit with veils and bold makeup. She waves her hand almost too eagerly to have you come closer alongside your sister. "Come, join us!"
Videos were filmed of the people gesturing to the cast of Dune in a line. Little by little, the row of people is filled and organized to be in the center of the camera's focus. Some actors had to move spots, due to lack of space or better color semblance on the other side of the row. You stood next to Jessica and Florence Pugh was beside your right, as you tried to stand closer for the picture.
Anya Taylor was on the opposite side, with Austin Butler and beside him, Timothee Chalamet. A noticeable clip taken all over was when the French actor went to greet the English actress, warmly, clasping her hand with both hands as a proper salute as on-screen siblings.
You did not mind the lack of attention. You were happy for Anya for achieving a great role. One with a welcoming cast and crew. It was then your eyes scanned down the row, from Zendaya to Stellan Skarsgard. Then to Austin, whom you've been familiar with since day one. Only him to find your gaze seconds later. You give a little nod and smile before averting your direction to Anya who is already staring at you with gleaming eyes.
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You were going back and forth with Jessica and Florence on your travels for a while. From plans reception to favorite desserts, all you three wanted to talk about was food. Paparazzi caught onto your banter quickly and snapped a few photos. You even went out of your way to do silly poses. Followed by Jessica and Florence, then did the same, sticking their tongues out in a rock star kind of fashion. You throw out piece signs, giving a dramatic frown as another flash happens.
Catch-ups were definitely refreshing and fun. Thus why you nearly jump when Austin appeared behind you.
"Oh my gosh, hey!" You stuttered, giving him a quick hug to calm your nerves. "You scared me!"
"Sorry sorry! I just wanted to surprise you!" He leans his head slightly, allowing better eye contact. You felt a few taps on your shoulder and noticed Jessica and Florence scurrying away, with their thumbs up, all goofy and excited.
Your eyes make it back to his. "I would've said hi back at the cast photo, but you were so far away," Shrugging you dismiss your failure as a mild missed opportunity.
But Austin shakes his head in an averted manner. "No- Don't worry about it." You could already sense interviewers and others with microphones closing on you two. You were out in the open, and it's bound to happen. "I wanted to- you know, say hi to you in a less chaotic place."
"I tried looking for you but there's just so many people," You give your costar an exhausted look. It was then a keen young man approached the pair of you. It was the People magazine, as you became aware of the logo alongside their camera and microphone.
"Hey, would you two mind a short interview for People's magazine?"
Truly, this was what premieres were about. The cast and crew meet with fans to show what they have worked so hard for. You brought you no better satisfaction than to praise everyone's efforts. The interviewer then proceeded to have a quick introduction of you and Austin beside you. You both had separate microphones in each hand. Once the video started rolling, you peered at the camera and gave the audience a grin.
"So how are you guys doing? Met all of your lovely cast members yet?"
"Oh absolutely," You emphasized every syllable, nodding. Austin only glances at you in amusement. "It's crazy how many people are here I was so overwhelmed!"
"Yeah, it was pretty crowded," The male actor adds, lowering his microphone slightly.
"Hopefully it will die down!" The interviewer beams. "So what was it like getting to know each other in this film? How was the first day on set like?"
"Oh, well it went very smoothly," You start, staring up at Austin in approval. "Even though my time was short on set, I feel like we had a pretty good rhythm starting out."
"I was about to say! The scenes with Feyd and Lady Margot were really something!"
"Why thank you, we appreciate it," Austin nervously laughs, scratching his ear.
The interviewer takes the lead to discuss your preparation for the role and how it was working with Villeneuve. As new characters, you and Austin both talked about your views on both of your characters. Both are very different yet mysterious to the viewers. Additionally, you two were introduced in a similar scene of the pit fight. The People's Magazine interviewer was compelled to compliment Austin on his opening scene. You knew he had practiced the choreographed fights vigorously. And of which you were lucky to witness on the days that you were present.
"It was completely freeing and different than what I was used to doing," Austin probes, leaning toward your direction. "Were you there for the pit fight?"
"I think I was," You turn, similarly. "I remember watching from afar and thinking wow." Immediately you could sense him eagerly looking down at you with a sly smile. "He was- Austin did amazing with the fight choreography, I was impressed!"
"Was this the first time seeing him in full costume too?"
"Oh yes!" You bonked your hand on your forehead, "He was and I just- couldn't believe it was him!"
Suddenly Austin jumps in, "She was startled when I first came up to her in full costume."
"You came out of nowhere, by the way!" You rebutted, giving him a side glance.
"I didn't mean to," As he tries to reassure his actions, "I wanted to give a good first impression!" It was humorous how playful you two were together despite having dissimilar filming schedules. Though most of your scenes involved Butler, your friendship only became more apparent weeks after working together. It was off and on for months at a time due to being busy in other countries simultaneously.
Eventually, you were able to link up again weeks before the premiere. After waiting a long time to meet up, you almost felt relieved that you hadn't seen your costar in a while.
"And Austin, how was filming with her?! From a character's standpoint, what kind of dynamic do you see playing out?" The People's Magazine interviewer perks up, having the camera transition from his face to Austin's.
"Well I'd say, she's great. You know I've got to meet a lot of amazing people in this film. And," He says your name sincerely, "She's- she's one of those people. I can't say much for Lady Margot and Feyd's relationship- you know there's a lot of that's still not uncovered. We don't really know what's happening but kind of have an idea of something. And to have such a great actress like her, it makes everything feel authentic and- feel the tension." It felt as if you were in a daze, eyes completely focused on his words with such admiration and grace. Before you knew it, you were smiling as if you had won the best possible prize in the world. His compliments to you meant more than you had anticipated really.
Unbeknownst to you, the cameraman had caught your lovestruck expression before directing attention back to the interviewer. "And how about you, Miss Margot?"
"I'd say it's the same," Now looking at the interviewer, only momentarily back at your costar. "Austin's- he's great at all the stunts and acting like a scary dude. Every scene with him was fun to do. Like he's all serious in character but once they yell cut! he's so nice and funny!" Your bubbly laugh breaks as you can feel your face growing hot.
"Well I appreciate you liking my humor," Austin pokes fun at you, fanning a little air towards you.
You mutter a soft thank you! before continuing, "And he's dedicated you know? I remember one scene, a little spoiler, where Feyd is about to be tested by Lady Margot, and I just couldn't do it! I couldn't keep a straight face!"
"Really?!"
"She just kept breaking, I don't know why," The actor shrugs, his attention closely drawn to you. "We had a few takes on a few days."
"We did! We did!" You gave a big frown, "You just have a really distracting face."
"Do I?" Austin asks, between the lines of teasing and coolly.
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By the time, other premieres had occurred, people were still focused on your interactions with Austin Butler. Your chemistry on and off screen on the carpet was hilarious. And with how polarizing your characters were, it made many clips of your shared encounters gain attention.
A few short videos were recorded after the People Magazine interview of you and Austin, bashfully talking behind the stage. The two of you went back and forth whispering in each other's ears about what was unknown to the viewer. Through a bird's eye view, the video also catches you hugging your arms before zooming in on Austin's placing an arm around your figure.
Another clip that had been reposted many times was when you both took duo pictures together. As you comfortably shift your weight on one leg, as you turn to have your side face the flashing paparazzi. Whilst the Elvis actor stands beside you at a pleasant distance, doing the same pose to the other side. There was one instance where you lifted your head to make eye contact with your eyes instantly brightening. As Austin's smile widened, only to blow air in your face.
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superhero--imagines · 7 months
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Being Sanji’s GF would include:
A/N: this is the ugliest banner I ever made I swear.
Tags: Female reader
* A man that is 6 ft +, can cook, and treats you with respect? I can’t believe we as a society weren’t simping for him before
* We already know that he loves pretty girls, so if you reciprocate his advances—he’s down hook, line, and sinker
* I feel like he’d fall hard and fast for someone a bit shy, with a soft form of kindness
* Sanji himself is so kind, even if it’s in these extremes depending on the gender of the recipient
* So seeing someone who kindness comes to so naturally, where it isn’t a flickering flame or a bright fire, but just a soft warmth that linger in all of their actions leaves him in awe
* “You’re amazing.”
* He’s still got a wandering eye though, so catch him randomly slapping himself or sitting with his face in his hands as he tries to restrain himself from ‘being unfaithful’
* “Hey Sanji?”
* “Hmmm.”
* “Have you ever thought about cheating on me?”
* The dishes he was washing clatters in the sink and he grabs your hand in both of his, kneeling in front of you
* “Never!” And he means it, he might look but he would never dream of being with someone other than you. “You’re the only person I want to be with.”
* I think as time goes on he gets a lot better at understanding why he feels the way he does, and eventually the flirtatious behavior cools down even though he’s still as kind as always because he realizes it comes from a place of craving validation instead of genuine love
* And honestly, now that he has you he doesn’t need it from anyone else anymore
* “(Y/N)-chan, can you get me the oregano?”
* You smile as you get it from the fridge, it’s not easy for him to ask you to do things
* He has the biggest goofiest grin on his face when you wrap your arms around his waist and rest your head on his shoulder
* Sanji would literally give you a romance as big as the world — or he’d try to at least
* “Sanji this is really lovely.” And you mean it, the candle lit dinner and all your favorite foods at the center of the deck
* “But um, I feel a little bad for Luffy.” It’s more than a little, there’s an entire waterfall of drool falling past his lips from his spot behind a pillar.
* His fingers curl under your chin, urging you to meet his gaze
* “There’s nothing to feel bad about, of course I would spoil the most important person in my life.”
* Your cheeks heat up from the words.
* “But Sanji—“ you look to the pillar seeing seven faces quickly duck, and a hand grab luffys still salivating head. “—they’re all staring!”
* If you could die from embarrassment you’d be six feet under
* “Let them stare, it’s because they’re dazzled by your beauty.”
* “Actually it’s because we’re hungry!” Luffy shouts, only to have his mouth covered by Nami.
* Sanji ends up making them a snack.
* His favorite hobby is pretending Chopper is your child when you guys go out
* “When are you guys going to stop pretending he’s your baby?” Zoro growls
* You look over at Chopper who’s happily sitting on Sanji’s shoulders, munching away on cotton candy
* “When he stops pretending to enjoy it,” You respond
* “That’s never going to happen!” Chopper shouts with a giggle
* He’s so greedy with you I swear
* You give him a kiss, he gives you back at least five
* You hold his hand, he keeps you glued to his side for the rest of the night
* “I know it’s ugly of me to get an inch and take a mile, but…around you I just can’t keep myself from trying.”
* He learns how to make all your favorite childhood foods, either from a relative or by studying old recipe books from your homeland
* And if you ever seem homesick or you’re feeling down he’ll suspense you with the dish
* “How did you learn to make this?” Your region is a far ways away from his usual French cuisine
* “I have my secrets.”
* Please cook for this man, just once, make a fancy dinner and have the whole crew pitch in as wait staff
* “You’re always taking care of us so this time we wanted to serve you!”
* He’ll eat half-burned pasta with tears of joy streaming down his face
* “This is the best meal I’ve ever had.”
* He’ll fall even harder for you if you have his wanted poster near your bunk bed
* “There’s a little red stain near my lips though—“
* “Ah, sometimes when I can’t see you at night I give it a little kiss for luck haha.”
* He’s dead. Sanjis dead.
* Cause of death: love sickness
* He died happy though
* He’s just such a simp for you man
* Like, take the shirt off his back and lay it over a puddle so you don’t get your feet wet, hear you’re craving a certain type of food and make it the next meal, buys you feminine hygiene products from the store with pride (along with some snacks he knows you like, kiss your hands and worship the ground you walk on type of love.
* Honestly what a dream
A/N: kinda wanna make a nsfw version too.
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inbarfink · 8 months
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Okay, so I already wrote a bunch of stuff about how that scene, although it is really sweet, is also kind of a Bad Sign for Simon - how he refuses to learn the Obvious Lesson from the Winterworld adventure (that being the Ice King again is probably a really really bad idea). But I want to talk about it also a little more about what it means for Fionna’s character as well. 
Because while sitting around and wallowing in self-loathing is probably bad for Fionna, especially after being told that she shouldn't be allowed to exist, and Simon is right to try and get her out of her funk. It's also still worthwhile for Fionna to have some introspection about the Consequences of Her Actions. Because she and Cake really did not consider them at all at first. They have a sense of morality and an instinct towards heroism, but they also tend to kinda forget the fantastical worlds they visit don’t exist entirely for their fantasy and have kind of a Protagonist-Centered-Morality fallacy. 
Most obviously you can see it in the market in Ooo. How Cake, in her excitement, damaged and hurt and even killed
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A bunch of innocent marketgoers without even noticing. And then Fionna immediately jumped to Cake’s defense against these ‘weirdos’, who were actually just normal kinda-righteously-angry Oooian citizens.
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It’s actually very similar to the whole Winterworld situation. Fionna’s assumption that she’s automatically the hero and protagonist of the story and black-and-white view of the situation and her tendency to kick ass first and ask questions later meant that she just recklessly injured a lot of innocent people.
(It might’ve been worse actually cause at least in Winterworld she was at least manipulated by an evil Wizard)
Fionna and Cake clearly have a great potential for heroism, but they do need to be a bit more considerate of the situation and people around them. And it does make sense considering that from their perspective - they’ve been living a very ordinary life up until now (and Cake was literally an animal. A very clever animal, but still not bound by the same standards of morality as the talking animals in Ooo). Action and adventure and fantasy stuff has been purely the realm of daydream and video games for them - and Fionna literally speaks about it in these terms.
(also, Fionna's Main Character Syndrome was undoubtedly validated when God literally told her that she was created to be the main character of her universe)
So yeah, it takes them some time to really process how to be heroes - they need to grapple with questions that Finn and Jake already kinda dealt with seventeen years ago. And actually a lot of those; how to resolve a situation without necessarily using violence, when does a 'villain' actually deserve sympathy and kindness, the importance of the larger context of any given conflict... their confrontations with Ice King all played a big part in that. It was never just him, but he was still a very major part.
And for Fionna and Cake right now, learning these lessons require some amount of personal introspection. So while it was a sweet attempt at comforting, I dunno if Simon’s little ‘the only problem with that universe is that this Alternative Me was terrible because he didn’t even acknowledge or remember Betty as the love of our life and the light of my entire universe’ thing is actually Good. 
I’m not quite sure Simon is the best person to teach Fionna and Cake heroism 101, because he is so focused on the Crown Quest as the thing that brings back Meaning to his life, and because his fatherly instincts just kinda go “Sad Young Person???? MUST GIVE COMFORT!” and also on account of the kidnapping.
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I’m sure Fionna is going to become the heroine she dreams about eventually, it’s just going to be a bumpy ride. The best we can hope for is that they accept Simon’s comfort, that she doesn't start believing that she is nothing but an Error for the entire universe like the Scarab claims, but don’t necessarily listen to all of Simon's his words either.
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avelera · 2 years
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It's so weird to think about how Hob is one of the few immortals I can think of in fiction that I can imagine having a life when the Major Events of the Story Plot aren't happening.
Like, what does you average dramatic Anne Rice vampire do when not Living Dramatically and dealing with the Anguish of their Cursed Existence? One reason "What We Do In the Shadows" is so funny to me is because it speaks directly to what absolute pillocks these vampires would look like if they weren't brooding under the perfectly toned shadows of their lairs but actually needed to walk into a 7/11 at 2 AM. Because dramatic vampires outside of their dramatic scenes just become immediately ridiculous and their over-the-top personalities kind of begs the question, "What if they're just normal people outside of the immortality and that means, sometimes, they're idiots?"
We only see most immortal characters when something big and important is happening historically, at a royal ball, a terrible battle, or otherwise at the heart of notable events. What do they do when they're just not really feeling it some night and curl up in their pajamas at home with a book?
To Neil Gaiman's credit, two of the other immortals I can picture going about life when the Major Plot Events aren't happening are Aziraphale and Crowley, whose entire emotional journeys in Good Omens are about the fact they want the Major Plot Events they were literally created to facilitate to stop so they can go back to getting takeout together.
(Nicky and Joe from The Old Guard are another exception, for any other fellow connoisseurs out there.)
And to bring it all back to Hob, he has got to be one of the most Major Plot Events-avoiding immortals I've ever seen. The guy is the best friend of an actual supernatural cosmic entity at the center of the events of our story, one who tangles with Lucifer, stops the destruction of the world as we know it, and who has impacted the events of our world for millennia. And Hob has no idea about any of this. He doesn't even know Dream's name.
Hob is just there to meet his friend for a drink in the pub, and then he'll probably go back to his job, like his normal job he needs to live in comfort and otherwise stay busy (since he doesn't need it to survive) and in the meantime, he has friends and even family and he does stuff and stays engaged with the world but, critically, with the normal day to day world. Hob is just out there living his best life, almost completely oblivious to the world-ending catastrophes happening almost under his nose, because he's just a guy living his life with all the little ups and downs and dramas, but also with nights curled up with a book, eating takeout because you can't be bothered to cook and unlike almost every other immortal in fiction, you can just so easily picture having a normal life when the drama spigot of the Plot turns off.
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natsaffection · 7 months
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Hiii, im 21 years old and she/her..uuhh I like Women (and I mean Women like 30 years +) feel free to write me or just look for relaxation on my blog🫂
English is not my first language, so please point out any mistakes, thank you. 🙋🏻‍♀️
M's MASTERLIST:
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Do not copy, repost, translate or claim my work as your own! Reblogs are appreciated though. <3
Most of the work is 18+ DNI, so if you’re a minor, do not interact with it!
Series:
[Natasha]: My sweet Baby. (NSFW)
• You took your long awaited four-day vacation, for which you had saved your money for two years. That you had almost no money would be an understatement. You just manage to get through your college with two part-time jobs (for which you get far too little money).So what happens when you meet the most successful CEO in the world in an unknowingly overpriced café?
[Natasha] : Mafias Mistress (NSFW)
• Your life takes a drastic turn when you accidentally meet Natasha Romanoff, who lives a mysterious and seductive life behind her facade. Despite Natasha's initial resistance, your light and attraction ignite a fiery romance that sets both your worlds on fire. But as your love grows stronger, so does the danger, especially when you discover Natasha's true identity. Surrounded now by wealth and danger, you become the new center of Natasha's universe and your bond is put to the test.
[Natasha]: I hate you!
• You were glad you escaped the hell trip. Even if it wasn't entirely your merit. You could finally smell the freedom you could only dream of before. However there was one person that disliked your presence since the moment you stepped foot on the campus. No matter what you do, you always get on her bad side. What happens when you find out the truth about her and she about you? Will her rivalry turn into your jobs or will it become something else?
[Natasha]: My sweet Student. (NSFW)
• You read and you dreamed about it. What if you fall in love with your teacher (who is also twice your age) and you can live your dream? She shows you your deepest sexual ideas and lives them out with you. On the shelf with the books and hello reality.
[Natasha]: Kingdom of secrets (NSFW)
• A story unfolds in the realm of celestria in which the younger Princess Y/n Dawn finds an unexpected connection with Lady Natasha Romanoff, the kingdom's revered and feared first female knight. Natasha, a skilled warrior known for her bravery on the battlefield and icy demeanor, is tasked by the king with protecting his daughter. As Natasha watches the princess grow, a complex and unexpected bond emerges between them that transcends the boundaries of age and status.
One shots:
[Natasha] Apologize (NSFW)
• Natasha let you apologize to her employees
[Natasha] Reward | Pt. 2 (NSFW)
• Coach! Natasha x Player! Reader
[Natasha] Happy anniversary (NSFW)
• Sugar!Mommy Natasha celebrates her anniversary with Sugar!Baby Reader
[Natasha] Together
• Sugar!Mommy Natasha is helping you through exams
[Natasha] Oh, Baby.. (NSFW)
• You break Natasha’s first rule. (NSFW)
[Natasha]: Afraid of loosing you.
• Natasha is your girlfriend of two years and is always overprotective over you. So what happens when you both get under an attack which priority it is to kill the black widow?
[Natasha]: Teacher!Nat x Teacher!Reader
• In a school where Prof!Natasha and Prof!Reader teach different languages, they have quite the contrasting reputations. Despite their differences, Natasha and Reader engage in playful flirting at work..
[Natasha]: Cure (NSFW)
• You got infected with the sex pollen and a red haired ..acquaintance offers to help you.
[Natasha]: Distraction (NSFW)
• Smutty hate sex with Boss!natasha and her assistant
[Hidden]: Natasha learns the real you (NSFW)
• Natasha gets to know the real you.
[Wandanat]: Unholy (NSFW)
• Wanda is a stripper and Nat took an interest in her
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smokestarrules · 1 year
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Why Caleb & Evelyn’s Absence is Good Writing
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So if you don’t know me, I’m a big fan of Caleb and Evelyn (Clawthorne. Because I’m sure). I’m fascinated with their story -- I wrote an entire fic about them in 2022 before we even knew Evelyn’s name -- and I find them both incredibly interesting considering what is both shown about them and not. Despite that, I had a feeling that neither of them would make an appearance in Watching and Dreaming, and I was right. 
Understandably so, some people were disappointed with that decision, that they were hoping for an entire flashback scene or something close to it. But while that also appeals to me -- oh my god does it appeal to me -- I also really enjoy the intangibility of it all. 
So, I have three reasons as to why I like that Caleb and Evelyn didn’t show up again, which I’ll go through in no particular order. The rest of this post will be under a cut because it’ll probably get pretty lengthy. 
1) Haunting The Narrative
Half of Caleb and Evelyn’s intrigue comes from the fact that in the end, we really  don’t know all that much about them. Everything that we do know is from second-hand accounts at best and the rest of their story is up to your own singular interpretation; we only know the bare bones of their tale, but at the same time, they’re both extremely monumental to the main plot of the show. 
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They’re hardly ever shown centered on-screen (in Evelyn’s case, never), and again, despite their huge impact on the characters and world even 400 years later, it’s part of their charm that... they’re mysterious. You’re not meant to know much about them, not meant to perceive them as normal characters. Caleb never speaks in the show, Evelyn hardly even appears, and in the end, they’re not meant to be understood. 
Caleb seems to have undergone some semblance of a redemption, but that’s only alluded to considering how he ends up dead; the implied is everything, and getting a concrete answer would, in my opinion, ruin part of what makes this story so fascinating. 
Of course, the biggest argument I’ve seen against this idea is that casual viewers of the show, the ones who don’t care about combing the background of Hollow Mind for lore about Emperor Belos’ big brother, will be confused without the lack of context. And... I disagree. 
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Sure, maybe some people haven’t seen the portraits from Hollow Mind, but they’ve certainly seen Caleb when Gus went through Philip’s mind in King’s Tide. Maybe they missed the book about Grimwalkers in Labyrinth Runners, but they definitely caught Caleb in Philip’s diary during Elsewhere and Elsewhen. Then, in Thanks to Them, there’s an entire scene in which Masha very kindly gives an entire summary on the topic, tipping off both the main characters and anyone else in the audience who may be confused. 
The story’s all there, both in the background and in the forefront of the show, and it’s weaved in so beautifully that it’s hard for me to believe that anyone would see Caleb in For the Future (of which is a scene I will be talking about soon) and have absolutely no idea who he is. 
So in the end, I think having a more clear understanding of the going-ons that set everything into motion would be almost doing a disservice to the fans who have spent their time piecing things together and it’s also not really necessary in the first place. It’d be nice, and I’m sure I would have gone even more insane with more to analyze, but with the way this show has always portrayed Caleb and Evelyn, them fading into obscurity in the final episode just seems... fitting. 
2) Philip Doesn’t Really Deserve Closure
It’s a simple fact: Philip Wittebane is kind of a fucked-up guy. 
Besides a flashback scene, another idea for a potential Caleb and Evelyn appearance that I saw tossed around most was this: it’s the end, Philip’s about to be defeated, and in the interim, he sees his brother one last time. 
Either he’s given forgiveness or not, Caleb being present at his lowest moment would undoubtedly mean something to Philip; over the centuries he’s spent a significant amount of time trying to remake his brother -- to make him better -- and no matter how you feel about him, Philip is a tortured soul. Perhaps Caleb could help him accept his inevitable death, perhaps he could have one last chance for Philip to have a moment of genuine vulnerability. 
He’d die with the ghost of his brother and the ghost of his brother’s wife looking over him, and he’d die content... maybe. 
Or you can go the other route: 
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On the other hand, maybe Philip goes to his death kicking and screaming the whole way, with Caleb and Evelyn staring him down as he’s ultimately annihilated for good. The tale of two brothers is over, and while Caleb is the one who perished first, centuries ago now, it’s Philip who is undoubtedly the one who loses in the end. 
The last thing Philip sees is his brother’s hateful, tired face, and he dies with that image. 
Of course, that’s the one that sounds better to me; Philip is not a villain you could ever redeem (a cruel upbringing will not excuse everything) and to even make an attempt at it would feel cheap and be completely unaligned with ToH’s core values, which actively (and correctly) condemn people like him. 
The problem with both of these ideas, different as they are, is that both of them give Philip a sense of closure that he simply does not deserve to have been rewarded with. Either way, he knows for sure how his brother would feel about him -- or, at the very least, how he believes his brother should feel about him -- and it’s just that, the knowing, that rubs me the wrong way. 
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In the end, the last time Philip sees his brother is in this scene in For the Future, and it’s safe to say that there’s no actual closure or anything close to it here. Whether or not you believe this is actually Caleb or just Philip hallucinating him (personally I subscribe to the latter), it doesn’t really matter because the idea stays the same. 
Philip spends this scene snarling curses at his unyielding brother -- who seems to be, notably, his younger self, given his hair length -- while also actively melting away in front of his eyes. Philip is the one who’s alive, Philip is the one who (he believes) is on the right side of history, and yet Philip is also the one on his knees, his entire body disintegrating slowly due to his own choices. 
As the episode continues, it’s shown that Philip is seeing Caleb and the other Grimwalkers that he’s likely killed as well, and they’re clearly more of a taunt to his already-collapsing mental state than anything else. Again I reassert my opinion that they’re not actually there, that they’re simply Philip hallucinating in one of his weakest moments yet, and because of that, there is no answer given. 
They stare; he tells them to “Shut up” and they don’t react in the slightest. They watch and they stare and they dare him to care about them in any way and the entire scene is just... a precipice. Eventually they disappear for good, and Philip moves on without even trying to process this phenomenon. 
Basically what I'm saying is that Caleb appearing in Philip’s last moments would give him too much credit. And that actually leads us right into the final point I want to make, which is this: 
3) Caleb Wasn’t Actually That Important To Philip 
In the long run, at the very least. 
Now hear me out. When I say ‘important’, I don’t mean that what happened with Caleb didn’t have long-lasting effects on Philip, because that’s simply not true; otherwise, my entire last point would be meaningless. Obviously, it’s Caleb (and to a lesser extent, Evelyn) who can be credited with initially setting Philip down this path; Caleb was probably the most stable thing in Philip’s early life, and losing him in a way that felt like abandonment -- and then killing him -- is undoubtedly something that would stick with you for a lifetime, 400 years or not. 
But Caleb’s death is also largely an excuse. 
Much in the same way that “saving humanity” is an excuse for Philip to commit the atrocities he does, Caleb’s betrayal pushing him towards that path and his subsequent attempts at bringing him back are also an excuse. 
Here’s the thing: if Philip was genuinely passionate about remaking his brother -- but better -- then he’d care about the Grimwalkers more than he does. If Philip actually considered every Grimwalker a potential Caleb that he could just fix, then he would not have been able to dispose of them so coldly. There’s dozens of their corpses piled under the Skull, yet he only even commits to memory a rare few. Even Hunter, the closest to Caleb a Grimwalker’s ever gotten, was given a Sigil! A Sigil, which tells me that no matter what, no matter how perfect Hunter may have turned out, Philip was never going to let him survive the Day of Unity. 
True, there’s definitely a part of Philip that hates the Grimwalkers because they can’t be Caleb, at least not in the way he thinks he needs (which is impossible, but I digress) there’s also a part that I think is just... carrying on because this is what he’s done for the past few centuries. It’d feel like giving up on himself to give up on the prospect of having Caleb beside him again, but there’s no passion anymore. 
In the end, I think Papa Titan said it best:
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“...That man doesn’t care about anything but his need to be the hero in his own delusion.” 
That’s exactly it. Philip believes himself as the hero of the story, as someone who’s been suffering for centuries but will one day finally get the ending that he deserves. He goes through all of this not because he wants to go home and not because he wishes he could return to the life he and his brother once had, but because he so desperately wants to believe in the delusion that he is a person doing all the things he does for good. 
You don’t live for over 400 years working towards a singular moment without at least having the thought that maybe what you’re doing is incorrect. But Philip has never let those supposed doubts stop him, and by the time the series is ending, nothing matters except his goal -- to see the destruction of every last witch and demon on the Boiling Isles.  
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Which is why, in this final scene of his, there’s not a single mention of his brother. His brother, who he’s spent the last 400 years trying to save; his brother, who, by learning to be better, essentially kickstarted Philip’s entire goal, but it became so twisted so quickly as Philip subconsciously decided that he was the only one who could ever fix things. 
To put it simply: Philip’s only ever been concerned with himself. His idea of morality, his vision of the Boiling Isles, his opinions on the witches that live there. Nothing else matters; Caleb is a crutch to fall back on and so is the idea that Philip’s saving anyone, it’s all just more vindication to feed into his hero complex, because he’s the only one that really matters. He’s human and Luz is human and so they’re redeemable, but he stopped seeing Caleb as human the moment he saw him with Evelyn. 
In the end, I feel as if it’s almost safe to say that Caleb and Evelyn as constructs are more important to the all-encompassing plot than they are to Philip specifically; they set him on his path, sure, but his descent into madness almost feels inevitable, death of his brother or not. He blames his own misfortune on them, and the fact that they're never quite seen makes Philip’s villainous qualities that much more emphasized, I think. 
Overall, I loved Watching and Dreaming and I loved ToH and I think the characters of Caleb and Evelyn are some of the most haunting I’ve ever encountered, literally and metaphorically. 
Their story is largely up in the air, but it still gets told, you just have to look for it. That's their charm, that’s why they’re interesting to me, and that’s why I am content with getting the amount we got of them. 
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ronwestbreeze · 1 year
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TO YOU , WORLDS AWAY : PART TWO : CHAPTER TWENTY - TWO
pairing: jake sully x fem!reader
summary: in which the sully family grows
word count: 3.1k
AO3 | prev | next
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Never in your entire life did you imagine you would have such happiness. This type of happiness that could only be told through fairy tales. And you never thought your life was a fairytale.
But when Jake stood in the center of the circle the entire clan created, holding your newborn baby girl in the air, you could’ve sworn that this was the dream. That this was the fairytale you had imagined long ago. That you had forgotten.
And when Jake said your daughter’s name, it all became so real.
“Tsa’te!”
Despite having her for a few weeks now, you still remember the pregnancy months as if it was yesterday. You remember being pretty stubborn in the beginning. You thought that just because you were pregnant did not mean you were going to be rendered useless. Much to Jake’s dismay, you continued to grab your spear for hunts as if it were any other regular day. Even when you were beginning to show.
“Can’t you take just one day of rest?” Jake asked you one day as you grabbed your spear for yet another hunt. He frowned at your weapon, glancing from it and your small swollen stomach. “You won’t be missing anything, Doc, Just please, rest for one day? Maybe more?”
You rolled your eyes as Neytiri, who was playing with Lo’ak and Kiri, chuckled, “I promised since I joined the clan I’d be useful, Jake. I’m not gonna stop now just because I’m a little pregnant.”
“And you are useful,” Jake told you, grabbing your arms and pulling you close to him. “And that’s not gonna change if you take a day to rest.”
That’s when Neytiri chimed in, “Ma’Jake, she can still hunt. She’s not far along and my mother says she’s fine to do so.” She picked up Lo’ak as she stood, giving Jake arm a squeeze, “Enough worrying, skxawng.”
Jake rolled his eyes as you grinned, “My own two mates are turning against me. Nothing new, still doesn’t hurt any less.”
“Eywa help me, please don’t let my child be as dramatic as my oh so loving husband.” You teased, leaving a kiss on the corner of his mouth. “I’ll be fine, Puppet. And if  something does happen, God forbid, I’ll have Ezì with me. Plus, it wouldn’t be the first time he dragged me back to camp after a reckless day.”
Jake cringed at the memory but didn’t protest any further. Kiri appeared next to your leg, looking up at the two of you curiously. Jake smiled down at her, placing his larger hand on her smaller head before saying to you, “Just make sure the both of you are careful, okay?”
“No promises!”
“Y/N.”
Then there were the days you began to get bigger and it became harder to go hunting. Your feet always ache and there was a point where your daughter kept kicking inside of you every few minutes. So much so to the point where it was too distracting to go on hunts anymore.
Obviously, you were pretty sour about this but your bad mood didn’t last too long when Kiri started staying close to you at all times once you decided to stay back at the camp. Lo’ak and Neteyam were with Neytiri most of the time, but whenever she went on a hunt as well, they’d be right by your side just as much as Kiri. Spider was the same whenever he was allowed to visit.
One day, you were lying in your hammock with Kiri sleeping on top of you. Jake returned to your tent, surprised to find the both of you there.
“You look comfortable.” He grinned at you as he placed his weapons down.
You glared at him, “Stay away from me you demon. My feet are achy because of you.”
Jake still walked over toward the hammock and lied down next to you. Kiri woke from her little nap and stared at Jake tiredly, “Hi, Daddy.”
“Hey, baby girl.” She crawled over to lie on top of him, laying her little head on his chest.
You sat up slightly, “She hasn’t left my side since you and Tiri left.” You watched Jake practically melt while holding Kiri and chuckled, “Who would’ve thought that big strong Toruk Makto would be undone by his own little girl.”
Jake smiled amusingly as he placed his hand on your stomach, “How’s Sully number four?”
“Pretty calm today. Not as many kicks compared to yesterday. I think she’s resting today, just like mommy.” You tucked a lock of hair behind your ear. As a couple of years had passed, you  began to grow into your new body. Your hair had grown, you  got used to the Na’vi clothing, hell, you don’t even speak English as much as you used to anymore. Some days, you forget you technically weren’t fully Na’vi.
“How do you know it’s a she?” Jake raised a brow curiously.
You shrugged, “Just a gut feeling ya know? Plus, Mo’at told me, so there’s that.”
A smile tugged at your lips at the stunned reaction from your husband. Jake sat up a little, staring at you in disbelief, “We’re having a baby girl?”
“Yeah.” You grinned, heart elated at his reaction. “I didn’t know if you wanted it to be a surprise or not so I’ve kind of kept it to myself until now.”
Jake brought his hand to your cheek, gently pulling you toward him as he pressed his lips against yours. He smiled at you, eyes sparkling with blissful happiness. “No, no, this is amazing! I didn’t even know you were that far along to tell yet.” He continued pressing kisses on your face, a giggle leaving your lips as he did. He pulled away slightly, to get a better look at you, his hand never leaving the side of your face, “How’re you feeling?”
You gave a small shrug, “I was a little nervous at first…” Glancing down at the sleeping Kiri, you gently tucked a short lock of hair behind her ear. “I didn’t have the best example of a mother growing up…Not until Grace really. Even then I don’t know the first thing about being a mother. Still to this day, I don’t understand how Grace did it.”
When you lied back down, Jake rested his head on your shoulder, humming into your skin, “You’re already such a great mother to the kids, Doc. I don’t doubt that you would be a fantastic mother to our baby girl.”
“I know, I know.” You’ve voiced this fear before when you first told him you were pregnant. And he said something similar to you before. Still, it didn’t make the fear go away entirely. But it was nice, having someone there with you, to let you know that you would be okay. Oftentimes you were the one that had to convince yourself of this. Jake closed his eyes, his face gentle and peaceful as he listened to your heartbeat. You let out a gentle sigh, “Who would’ve thought. Me as a mother.”
You felt Jake chuckle against you, “I’ve dreamed of this day the moment I set eyes on you.” He lifted his head up to press another long kiss against the corner of your mouth “I wouldn’t have it any other way.”
“Oh Sully.” A grin tugged at your lips as you ran your hand through his thick locs, “Who knew you were such a romantic.”
“I like to think I’m full of surprises.”
As the two of you grinned, soon the rest of the Sullys entered the room. Lo’ak and Neteyam saw the both of you lying in the hammock together and ran toward the both of you. Lo’ak was the first to crawl into the hammock, “Dad! I caught a fish today!”
“Really? How big?” Jake asked, sitting up slightly as Lo’ak crawled onto him.
“Really big!” The boy grinned excitedly.
Neytiri climbed in the hammock next to Jake while Neteyam climbed in next to you. He looked at you curiously, “Did you tell Dad that we’re having a sister yet?”
Jake gawked while Neytiri smiled in excitement for you, “You’re having a girl?!”
“You told Neteyam first?!”
You rolled your eyes at your husband’s dramatics, “Technically, Neteyam was with me when Mo’at told me what I was having. I told him to keep it to himself until I told you.” You hugged the boy close to your side, “He’s my good little secret keeper.”
“He gets it from his mother.” Neytiri nodded proudly.
“We’re getting a sister!” Lo’ak cheered excitedly. “Will she be nicer than Kiri?”
“Hey.” Jake scolded gently, fighting back a smile.
Neytiri caressed her son’s cheek lovingly, “If she’s anything like her mother…”
Lo’ak frowned, “Mom’s not mean.”
Jake snorted, “To you all.”
Lo’ak rolled his eyes, “Just because she’s mean to you, Dad, doesn’t mean she’s mean.”
Neteyam grinned while you held back a laugh at the offended look on your husband’s face. Neytiri chuckled, “He’s been spending a lot of time with Y/N.”
“Clearly.” Jake grumbled.
When Tsa’te was born, when you saw your little girl’s eyes for the first time, you swore to yourself, just like with the other kids, that you would protect her from the world. You would do anything to keep that little toothless smile on her face. And soon, similar to Jake, you began worrying about the day the Sky People would return. Before, you didn’t think much about it and decided to stay focused on this new life, on your happiness, on living your life as Na’vi now.
Even though you kept these fears to yourself, you knew Jake could tell it was bothering you too now. You knew that Neytiri noticed it, but like you, tried to be optimistic, tried to continue living life. And so, you followed her example. All you focused on was your little star.
You stood under the Tree of Souls as you connected Tsa’te’s queue to one of the stems for the first time. Establishing a connection with Eywa. It was a tradition if you remembered correctly. Both Jake and Neytiri told you about it before the day had come, explaining that they had done it with Lo’ak, Neteyam, and Kiri.
Jake appeared next to you, his hand squeezing your waist as the both of you stared fondly at your daughter, “How is she?” He asked.
“Curious.” You chuckled as your daughter kept moving her head around to look at her surroundings. “Not even a few months old and she’s already becoming my little handful.”
Jake grinned, “Sounds just like her mother.”
“Nah, sounds more like her Jarheaded father.”
“Easy.” He playfully warned as he pressed a kiss against your head and then one on Tsa’te’s forehead.
Eventually, you gave Tsa’te over to Mo’at so that the Tsahik could pray for the All Mother to watch over her and accept her as the newest member of the Omatikaya.
Soon, the ceremony ended. You separated from Jake and Neytiri, taking Tsa’te with you in your baby carrier as you did. With the promise of returning soon and after telling Lo’ak that he could come another time with her, you set out on a short trip to the lab, with a babbling Tsa’te attached to your chest.
Fortunately, the lab wasn’t too far from where you lived. So you were there in no time. Tsa’te, thankfully didn’t get too agitated, far too busy taking in her new surroundings as you entered the labs to greet Norm and Max.
“Wow, Doc, it’s like a mini you.” Norm chuckled when he saw Tsa’te. “Who would’ve thought?”
You grinned, “Yeah, but give it a couple of years. She may have my looks but I have this feeling that she will end up a lot like Jake.”
Max smiled while Norm snorted, “Good luck.”
After covering your daughter’s eyes and flipping Norm off, you moved toward the avatar tubes to find Grace’s avatar where it always was.
You had visited the labs a few times in the past just to see Grace’s avatar. And every time you did, both Norm and Max left you alone. They probably knew you’d talk to her quietly, if they did they didn’t let anything on because they knew this was a private moment for you, whenever you came to see her. And you would keep doing so, even if it seemed trivial.
“Hey, Grace.” You smiled, gently placing your hand on the glass of the tube. Of course the avatar didn’t register your presence. “I want you to meet someone.”
Carefully, you took Tsa’te out of the carrier and held her, allowing her head to rest on your chest as you did. A grin made its way to your lips, “This is Tsa’te. Tsa’te, this is Grace. You weren’t born when she was around but Grace was the best scientist and human I knew. When the Omatikaya tell you tales of the horrible Sky People, just remember that Grace was one of the good ones. Same as your father. Same as I.”
Tsa’te looked down at the avatar with her large eyes. Her thumb halfway in her mouth. You chuckled. “I think she’ll understand the meeting a lot better when she’s older, Grace. But yeah, this is my daughter. Like Norm said, who would’ve thought, huh?” Tsa’te giggled when you chuckled, clearly having no clue what it was that was funny but laughing anyway because you were. “Kiri’s doing well. She and the boys are getting older by the day. It’s like I blink and they’re the next age. I don’t want them to grow up just yet.”
You watched the avatar twitch before letting out a quiet sigh, “I miss you every day, Grace…and you know what’s crazy? Some  of the kids aren’t calling me tsmuke anymore. They’ve started calling me what you used to be called. Sa’nok…imagine that….”
Tsa’te began squirming in your arms, which told you it was time for you to head back now. “Bye, Grace. May Eywa be with you.”
When you returned back to your tent where the others were, Tsa’te was already wanting to join whatever chaos the Sully family were getting up to. Jake wasn’t there—if you had to guess he was possibly caught up with some Olo’eyktan duties—but Neytiri and the kids were there. Lo’ak, Neteyam, Kiri and Spider were outside playing—what game, you didn’t know this time. And after feeding her, you gently placed Tsa’te down and watched with a grin as she crawled toward Lo’ak who happened to be closest to the outside of the tent.
“Tsa’te!” Lo’ak ran over to pick her up, earning a giggle from the toddler. He rushed back over toward the others, holding Tsa’te up victoriously, “We got another player for the game!”
“Be gentle with her, Lo’ak!” You called.
“I will Mom!” Lo’ak responded, despite the mischievous glint in his eyes.
You frowned and turned to the eldest, “Neteyam—”
“I’ll make sure he’s gentle.” He called with a nod before turning to the others.
You chuckled and turned to Neytiri who was already watching the children with a certain look on her face. Already knowing the look, you sighed and grabbed one of the raw fish to cut, “Let it go, Tiri.”
“Why do you insist on bringing that demon boy around them?” She hissed quietly toward you, a frown on her face. “Especially, knowing who his father is—”
“He’s not his father.” You told her simply. The two of you had this conversation in the past before. Neytiri’s dislike for Spider wasn’t lost on you and it was one of the things you two had a disagreement on the most. It never really led to much of a fight, Neytiri just often complained and then begrudgingly let it go until the next time she was fed up enough about it to bring it up again. “Plus, Kiri and the boys love having him around. Just think about them—”
“I do think about them.” Neytiri frowned but turned her eyes toward the food she had been cutting. “But I also think about him whenever I see that boy…” Her face softened a bit when she looked at you, “how do you do it? Even after everything he’s done?”
You really didn’t have a good answer for that. Still to this day you still had nightmares and saw his face. But whenever you looked at Spider, you didn’t see Quaritch. You just saw a boy wanting to belong. You saw yourself in him and for that you couldn’t turn your back on him. You couldn’t blame the poor boy for the sins of his father. That wouldn’t be fair. That wouldn’t be right.
“Well for one thing, he looks more like his mother than his father.” You joked a little. Neytiri rolled her eyes but you continued, “He still haunts me…somedays are harder than most…but I learn to just live rather than stay stuck in the past…it’s easier said than done…but I do understand a lot of things can’t be forgiven or forgotten.” You placed a hand on Neytiri’s shoulder, “I understand, believe me I do….Just don’t take it out on him, okay? He’s innocent. All he’s ever done is lived. He didn’t ask to be born to a monster.”
Neytiri didn’t say anything for a moment. Her face was still hardened but her shoulders were less tense than before at your words. Still, she huffed before saying, “That boy is your responsibility. He’s your itan.”
You sighed. A part of you wished Neytiri could be a little bit more open minded but you understood her hesitance, her closed minded thoughts on the Sky People and Spider. You couldn’t push.
All you could do was be content with her tolerance.
“I want to hold her now, Lo’ak!” You heard Kiri complain.
“You already got to! You held her the longest!”
“Did not! Neteyam took her before my turn was finished!”
“Well, too bad! I have her now!”
“You’re such a penis face!”
“Hey!” You turned to them, eyes widened at Kiri’s language. “Language, girly! What did I tell you about that?”
Kiri pouted, “Sorry, Mama.”
Neytiri tsked and you sighed, “God, who even taught her that?” You probably did with how much cursing you’ve done before. But at least you didn’t say around the kids….at least you think you haven’t.
“Argh!” You turned your head to find Jake entering the tent seconds later, “Damned fuckface—”
“Jake!” You and Neytiri gawked at him.
Jake closed his mouth, glancing from the kids to the two of you before rolling his eyes, “Oh please, Doc cusses more and you’re condemning me?”
“Fuck off!” You hissed.
“What did you say, Mom?” Neteyam called.
“Nothing!”
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taglist: @luvvfromme @sully-stick-together @jakesullylvr @s-u-t @ssc7514 @cheari @tojigirl @nyotamalfoy @perfectprofessorloverapricot @naityelen @dumb-fawkin-bitch @raggedyoldwitch @nhemmingsf @biooiuygjjgfsrb @thatsenoughformelol @thotd-f1 @beaniebeensbaby201 @theoriginalwife000 @3leni @23victoria @lovesickollie @atxara @im-in-a-pansexual-panik @ladylovegood-69 @lovekeeh @lilithmoon14512 @n7cje @fyfy-world @cleverzonkwombatsludge @goddesslilithmoriarty @itszzmoon @eternallyvenus @bajadotcom @ducks118 @alexandra-001 @sweetllamaparadise @padfootsvixen @avatarmasterlistblog
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😑😑😑
"Aang is a bad main character because the world has to adapt to his world view. Meanwhile I love Zuko for his brilliant arc that concludes with him making his nation to adapt to his world view now that he is in charge" fuck these people. "Younger generation fixes the problems the old ones created" is only bad as a theme when they don't like the kid in question.
"He has to save Katara, the weak damsel in distress" So we're really just gonna ignore all the times she saved his ass, and how she literally BROUGHT HIM BACK FROM THE DEAD just to pretend the show is sexist?
"He has to pretend the world isn't in agony" Are you high? Aang is constantly pushing himself to do things he doesn't wanna do (go with Zuko willingly, confront Hei Bai, go to the Fire Nation on the solstice, intentionally trigger the Avatar State, cross the serpent's pass despite having permission to go through a safer path, let go of Katara and risk losing her in the battle for Ba Sing Se, and even accepting he'll have to kill Ozai in the finale) just to innocent people won't suffer. For fuck's sake, he has plenty of compassion for the guy that SENT AN ASSASSIN AFTER HIM. Just because he's still holding onto whatever childhood innocence he can, doesn't mean he's blind to the issues around him.
"Zuko's arc is independent from Zuko's" They have a fuck ton of parallels, and entire EPISODES dedicated to said parallels. Zuko himself said chasing Aang fueld his fire - and he said that when he learned a higher form of firebending ALONGSIDE AANG, who had just saved his ass from being burned alive by the dragons by figuring out they were supposed to dance together.
Zuko was so obsessed with Aang he tried to engage in a conversation AFTER AANG'S SOUL LEFT HIS BODY, and he had a weird fever dream where he literally BECAME Aang. We get confirmation in book 3 that Zuko never forgot how Aang mentioned the possibility of them being friends if things were different, and the show ends with them as best friends in an obvious parallel to Roku and Sozin.
You know who had fuck all to do with Zuko's arc though? KATARA, yet these people keep insisting she's totally important to it.
"Episodes centered on Katara and Sokka are good because they ignore Aang" No they don't, he's just not front and center, same for Toph, or Zuko, because that's how FOCUS works.
Also, for all the shit "The Headband" gets for supposedly being "filler", it's shocking to me how people act like "Sokka's Master" was briliant and not at all rushed. It's honestly as irrelevant as "The Great Divide" for me.
"Aang had lots of Deus Ex Machinas" He had one, the lion turtle. The Avatar state is introduced right away, and explained in depth a whole season before the finale, AND it was not that easy to use.
Katara bringing him back from the dead is even less random. In the first episode of season two, we are introduced to the concept of "Aang can still be killed in the Avatar State and that is REALLY bad", to the the character that will kill him and how she'll do it (Azula with her lightining), and to the water of the spirit oasis - which the show goes out of it's way to remind us of before Aang is even dead. That's a fuck ton of foreshadowing and proper narrative set up.
"Deus Ex Machina" does not mean "Protagonist survives major battle" or "Hero defeats a super powerful villain", it means "Day is saved by a thing that had never been mentioned in the story before so the audience could have never guessed what would happen." These people want to talk shit, but only show they have no fucking clue how some REALLY basic storytelling stuff works.
79 notes · View notes
smoshysimp · 3 months
Text
how it should have gone
shayne x reader
warnings: it’s kinda a sad one
“just, shut up and listen to this.”
shayne rolled his eyes, already obeying with a wordless reply.
you pressed play on your phone and put it down on the center console. soon after, the car’s speakers filled with hepburn’s moon river.
hardly satisfied with your feat, you turned your body toward your door and stared out the window. you were mad at him, because he ruined the moment. the sun was perfectly set in front of the both of you as you drove on the highway. mountains became more prominent on different parts of the horizon. shayne had just finished driving through the majority of albuquerque and you felt the song was fitting for the view, at least, before you started to argue about something you didn’t even remember anymore.
dream maker, you heart breaker; wherever you’re goin’, i’m goin’ your way
you hated when this happened. you found yourself remembering every argument, all forming into one giant fight in your mind. about leaving on time, about family members making the trip hard, about each other making the journey unbearable; no matter how you went about it, you two had basically fought and jabbed at one another the entire time. and the damn song you put on made you feel worse, when it was supposed to romanticize the sunset.
two drifters off to see the world, there’s such a lot of world to see
sometimes, you felt so alone. you felt trapped, because he was with you when you found out about your parents. who else could you talk to about anything? you didn’t have your mentors anymore to help with relationship situations like these. you were too old to google the problem and search for answers. hopeless moments lasted forever, and branded the edges of your memories as if to remind you that you never truly enjoyed a quiet moment.
with a sigh, you placed your hands in your lap and picked at your nails. to your surprise, shayne’s right hand grabbed your left and brought it closer to him.
“i’m sorry. i’m sorry for arguing with you right now, and for arguing so much during the trip. i picked a lot of fights that i shouldn’t have, and i didn’t mean to do that to you. i know it’s really hard, going back after so long and around their anniversary, but i love you, and i know your parents would be proud of you.”
you gave his hand a squeeze as you fought back tears; your head and body still faced the passenger window. “i’m sorry too.”
his thumb brushed against your knuckles. no words were exchanged as the song ended, and it went back to playing whatever was on his playlist.
“can you play it again?” he asked.
you nodded your head, unsure if he saw it. not wanting to break the connection, you grabbed your phone with your free hand. the song played again, and this time, your body faced him as you both silently gazed into the mountainous sunset.
moon river, wider than a mile; i’m crossing you in style someday
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be-with-me-so-happily · 11 months
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Chapter 5
Series Summary: Gemma is definitely Cassidy James' favourite Styles family member, considering they are best friends and all. And especially considering that Harry Styles is Gemma's smug and self-centered younger brother. Her life isn't perfect, and neither is she, but she knows for a fact that anything involving Harry gets messy.
Chapter Summary: Things are changing, for the entire world, so Harry and Cassidy navigate their friendship through the new situation that everyone now finds themselves in. Will things ever be the same as they were?
Chapter Warnings: Some explicit language, Covid-19, lockdowns & quarantines, mild injury, potential jealousy, wine consumption
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[ present - March 2020 ]
With her phone held in front of her face, Cassidy quickly scans the vicinity of the room, through the door frame, making sure Cecelia is not within earshot.
"At least half of the country is on edge." She states quietly, eyes still glancing around to look out for her toddler. The little one doesn't need to hear or sense any concern that is present in their current conversation.
"It's the same here. The new travel ban isn't helping." Harry replies, sighing as he dips his head down. "It's the uncertainty of things. No one knows what's going to happen. It's as if the future is hazy."
"Hopefully it's nothing to be too concerned with." She responds, yet feeling a mild tightness in her chest. Just like Harry said, it's the uncertainty that worries her.
"On to a more positive subject, if things settle down, are you doing anything for Mother's Day? It's in a few weeks, yeah?"
Cassidy's shoulders raise in a shrug, an odd and solemn feeling rushing over her. She's never truly celebrated the holiday. When she was younger, her father obviously never did anything for her mum. Not anything good, anyway. Cassidy tried to do fun things with her, but it wasn't much. When she became a mum herself, there wasn't another person in the home besides her baby girl, so no one else was there to share in the traditional festivities of the day. Not that she wanted a big fuss anyway. Besides, this is the first year that Cecelia is even remotely aware that there is anything special about it. Needless to say, it has yet to be anything but another day of the week up until this point, so she hasn't thought to do anything specific.
"I don't know. It's like Valentine's Day, we'll probably just keep it simple."
"Nope." Harry states with a strong shake of his head. "I'm texting my mum."
"Don't you dare, Harry!" Cassidy exclaims, wishing she could reach through the screen to stop his plan from going any further, whatever it may be.
"You can't just do nothing for Mother's Day, Cass! You're a good mum! You should do something!"
"Harry, I swear to god-"
"Too late!" He proclaims triumphantly, that smug little smirk appearing immediately. Cassidy gives him the most intense glare she possibly can, hoping he can feel it somehow on the other end of the video chat.
"I hate you."
"That's not very nice…" He pouts, causing him to receive an eye roll of an unamused nature. "May I please talk to Cece? She's much more pleasant."
"Yeah, well, that's because she actually likes you." Cassidy quips, mimicking his mischievous smirk to add to her sarcastic insult.
"Hey…" Harry states. "Bloody hell. You're a grump today…"
Cassidy chews on the corner of her bottom lip. She knows she's being a bit too snappy. She isn't meaning to. All the talk, and worry, about this new virus that is spreading rapidly, it's getting to her a bit more than she expected. It doesn't help that she just started her menstrual cycle, and that Cecelia woke up multiple times during the night with a sudden onset of bad dreams.
"Sorry about that." She sighs, looking up to her phone, finding Harry's eyes attempting to flicker over her features through the video call. "It's just that things aren't really going very well today."
"Do you… you don't have to… but do you want to talk about it?"
Much to her annoyance, Cassidy cannot help the small flutter in her stomach at his concern and willingness to help. It hasn't even been that long but he really has become one of her closest friends.
"It's…" She chuckles, feeling just slightly awkward enough to stop herself before talking to him about her physical female issues. "Woman stuff."
"Ah. Okay." Harry responds, nodding as if he understands exactly what she means. Though, he might. He grew up with two women in the household, and has obviously dated a number of them too. Even still, it's not something she's willing to go into detail about.
"Also, Cece didn't sleep well last night." Her lips tense together in an awkward smile, and Harry presents a more sincere pout at the new information.
"That's no good." He replies, a slightly sad tone to his words.
"I'm sure she really would love to talk to you, actually." She admits, no longer with her comical demeanor.
"Alright. Send me over to her." He smiles, causing Cassidy to do the same.
She gets up from the edge of her bed, walking into the living room where she, of course, finds her daughter colouring across multiple pages of paper.
"Hey Bug, Harry wants to say hi."
Cecelia immediately drops her crayons and bounces in her place on the floor, waiting for her mum to bring over the phone. Cassidy giggles at her daughter's excitement and looks at her phone to switch the camera view for Harry to see the little girl's anticipation.
Suddenly, she is halted and instantly feels a shooting pain through her foot, originating from her pinky toe. Her hands fly up and she turns around to watch in agony as her phone lifts into the air and then falls onto the floor, smacking down against the tile in the kitchen.
"Oh for fu-... for crying out loud!" She shouts, holding back the true words she wants to release, for the sake of setting a good example for her daughter.
"Umm… hello? What happened? It's dark over here." She hears Harry say as she wobbles over and retrieves her device. "Are… are you alright?"
"I stubbed my damn toe." She growls, turning it over to find the back camera cracked all the way through. Shattered would be a better description. "And the camera is broken."
"Is it salvageable?"
"I doubt it. I can't do much about it anyway. I don't have the time right now to get a new one. Figures." She sighs, grinding her teeth down enough to feel pain in her jaw. She is usually better at handling or at least hiding her frustration, but her hormones and lack of sleep, as well as everything going on in the world, have just built up inside and this was the thing to tip her over. "Nothing is going my way today."
For some reason, she brushes off the phone, as if the dusting off would solve her problems, and then walks back over to Cecelia, whose eyes are wide open, clearly trying to use her three year old brain power to understand what just unfolded in front of her.
"Is Harry still on da phone?" Cecelia asks, her face changing to one ready for disappointment.
"Yes he is." Her mum replies, flipping the camera view back to face her, handing the device over to her daughter, and plopping down onto the sofa behind her.
"Harry!"
"Hello Cece!" He exclaims back, with just as much enthusiasm as he received. "What are you doing today?"
As Cecelia lifts up each of her drawings to proudly show them off, Cassidy examines her now throbbing toe, discovering the nail half snapped off, and she grimaces at the pain.
She leans forward and rests her elbows on her thighs, pinching her nose between her finger and thumb, squeezing her eyes shut. This isn't the worst thing to happen to her, and it isn't the worst day she's ever had. Not even close. Quite a few from her childhood could easily win that title. But, the sense of feeling overwhelmed still manages to hit her hard, and tears begin to sit on her lower lash line.
"Yeah, but Mummy helped-ed me when I had da bad d'eams."
"You have a very good mum." Harry states, causing Cassidy's head to snap up, seeing his gaze switch between her and Cecelia. His subtle smile pulls her out from the downward spiral of negativity, just enough to straighten her posture.
"She's da best mummy ever!" Her daughter exclaims, and Cassidy's eyes begin to water again, forming out of gratitude now instead of helplessness.
"Could you give the phone back to your mum, please?"
"Yeah, 'kay. Buh-bye Harry!" Cecelia waves to the forward facing camera, thankfully still working for this interaction, and hands the phone back to Cassidy. She quickly swipes a finger over each cheek, clears her throat, and lifts up the device to be in full view of the man on the other end.
"Cass, are you sure you're okay?" He asks, so much compassion in his voice that even the hardest of hearts would not be able to reject it. She's almost positive that statement would have changed her mind about him when they were younger. Possibly.
"I'll be alright." She replies, unsure of the honesty behind her answer, but certain that she does not want to burden him with any of these minimal problems.
"I'm here to help if you need me, okay? Well, I'm here, in Los Angeles, but the sentiment still remains." He chuckles, and Cassidy cannot hold back the small laugh she instinctively lets out.
"Thank you." She replies, knowing his generous heart, and not being one to hold back from doing what he can for a friend.
"No problem. But I should get going, and get a bit of sleep."
"Wait… what time is it there…?"
Harry pulls his lips inward, tightly, and closes his eyes, being accompanied by a subtle shake of his head.
"Harry…"
"It's 1 in the morning." He utters, scrunching up his face with the admission.
"Oh my god, Harry! We wouldn't have rung if we knew what time it was there! Why did you answer the phone in the middle of the night?"
"I couldn't ignore a call from one of my best friends, and her mum!"
"Piss off. You're horrible!"
"And you're still a grump. G'night!"
Cassidy rolls her eyes and watches Harry give a quick wink before reaching in front of him and ending the call. She locks the screen and reaches to place it in her pocket when she feels a notification cause her phone to buzz. She brings it back around and opens her messages to see a couple of texts from Anne.
🗨️ Anne: come over on mother's day
🗨️ Anne: and that's non-negotiable
"Oh for fucks sake." She whispers. "I'm going to kill him."
•••
Curled up on the couch in a blanket, fingers tapping away on the laptop sitting on her thighs, Cassidy groans at the sudden rapping at the front door. The thought crosses her mind to ignore the stranger on the other side, but the knocking continues, so she figures an answer to their persistence will shut it down sooner.
She angrily swings the door open, ready to scowl at the intrusion, when she is halted by the sight of her best friend.
"Bloody hell, CJ!" Gemma exclaims, her eyes wide. "Why weren't you answering the door?"
"I was trying to avoid the annoying person who was interrupting my day." Cassidy chuckles, feeling thankful it was simply her friend, and slightly guilty that she didn't respond to her sooner.
"Annoying?" Her friend drops her jaw in disbelief. "Bit rude considering I brought you some coffee!"
Cassidy's eyes travel down to the to-go cups in her friend's hands, and can already feel the warmth of the drink inside.
"Just let me in and then drink this immediately, for fucks sake." Gemma adds, bringing Cassidy's eyes back up as she opens the door.
Gemma makes her way in and directly over to the sofa, instantly settling herself in as Cassidy takes a seat to the side of her.
"So, what's up?" She asks, taking a sip of beverage she has just been handed.
"I can't just visit my best friend?" Gemma replies.
Cassidy immediately lets out a laugh. Despite loving to spend as much time together as they can, and do, she knows her friend too well to ignore the expression all over her features.
"Not when your face looks like that!" Cassidy points out. Gemma opens her mouth in dramatic fashion, attempting to portray offense at Cassidy's assumption of ulterior motives.
"Fine. I heard that you're spending Mother's Day with me and Mum…" Gemma states. Cassidy subtly grumbles at Harry's sneaky plan to get her to celebrate the holiday. She definitely plans to give him a few words about inconveniencing his own family, just to get her out of the house. "I was hoping you could help me figure out what I can get for her."
"Shit." She responds, thankful that her daughter is currently at daycare and not within earshot of the curse words that just have, and will most likely continue, to be uttered during their conversation.
"Right? Why is she so difficult to buy for?" Gemma whines, pouting as if she were a toddler herself, again.
"She's just always so fucking generous that she never wants or asks for anything for herself."
The pair laugh at the notion of complaining about how selfless Anne is, though they love her for it. Cassidy likes to think that Cecelia's contentment for anything and everything she receives has come from the influence of that wonderful woman. Neither Anne nor Cecelia care too much about what they have or are doing, as long as it's with the people closest to them, which sparks a small idea.
"Why don't we treat her to a fancy afternoon tea time somewhere?" Cassidy perks up with excitement, one she can actually get on board with if the celebration must include herself. "She's always wanted to go to Claridge's, right?"
"Yes! That's perfect!" Gemma exclaims, pulling her phone out swiftly and bringing it in front of her. "I'm going to tell Harry so he can pitch in."
"You're making him contribute? He's not even here." Cassidy chuckles.
"So? She is his mum too… and I'm pretty sure his bank account can handle it."
Her statement is true, and Cassidy is once again reminded of just how big a star her friend Harry is. It boggles her mind that she grew up with him, that she actually grew up with the now famous Harry Styles, because she still doesn't really think of him that way unless and until it's brought to her attention in certain situations. But, she realizes that as his career continues growing, his celebrity status is a fact that is becoming more and more prominent to her.
Cassidy takes another sip of her coffee and a sudden knock at the door causes both of them to immediately snap their attention towards that direction.
"I have no idea who that could be…" She states, turning back to her friend as if Gemma would have more of a clue.
"So then answer the bloody door, CJ." Gemma chuckles, rolling her eyes as her thumbs type out a message on her phone.
She gets up, hastily making her way over, and opens the door to find a man standing in front of her with a decent sized box in his hands.
"Miss James? Miss Cassidy James?" The man asks, and as she looks over his attire, she notices that he doesn't appear as someone who usually makes deliveries.
"Umm… yes, that's me…" She responds timidly, only leaving the door open enough to view the stranger on the other side.
"Excellent. I have a package here for you from Mr. Styles." He explains, lifting the box in full view with a pleased smile on his face.
"I'm sorry, what?"
The man looks down to the object in his hands, glancing over the information typed out on the printed label.
"Mr. Styles asked me to deliver this to you as soon as it arrived." The man clears his throat, which causes Cassidy to shift in place. "He said that he didn't want just anyone to bring it to you and to personally make sure you received it."
Her mouth opens slightly but her brain seems to be unable to form words. Without her ability to function normally, she gives the man a simple nod to thank him, retrieving the box through the doorway.
"Have a good day, miss." He states, responding with his own nod and a smile as he walks away, and Cassidy closes the door behind him.
As she makes her way back to the sofa, her expression immediately turns into confusion, and her curiosity begins to heighten. She is completely unsure as to what Harry could have sent her way, especially considering he is held up in an entirely different country.
"What in the-?"
"Just open it! I want to know what's inside!" Gemma squeals, bouncing in her spot much like something Cecelia does quite often when she is excited.
"You don't know?"
A simple head shake from her friend gives her the boost of interest to grab the mysterious package and pull it into her lap.
She looks to the small table to the side of the couch, quickly finding a pair of scissors that are just sharp enough to cut the tape. A few snips and the box is free to reveal what's inside. Cassidy gives a quick look to her friend, finding comedy in the giddiness they both suddenly begin to feel.
She pries open the top, reaching in and pulling out a box of chocolates. It's not something that needed to be sent to her or delivered by a man in a nice coat, but nonetheless, she won't complain.
The sweets are set next to her as she brings her attention to something else she seems to have been gifted. As her eyes meet the item inside, shock takes over the function of her body, as well as inhibiting any words to leave her lips, yet again.
"Well…?" Gemma asks impatiently, leaning forward and peering to get a view for herself. "A phone? Why did he send you a phone?"
Cassidy's focus shoots over to a paper flush against the side and pulls it out to find a note from the man in question.
CHOCOLATES TO FIX THE ATTITUDE PROBLEM AND A NEW PHONE TO FIX THE CAMERA ISSUE.
- H
"I'm seriously going to kill him." She whispers to herself, not knowing if Gemma was aware of the sentence she just spoke.
"I agree with the attitude problem. You've been quite moody. I suppose that's understandable though." Gemma jokes, pushing her shoulder against Cassidy. "But what's wrong with your phone?"
She lifts herself enough to pull the device out of her pocket, handing it over as she continues to glance over the new one now in her hands, removing the plastic from the outside container.
"Yeah, this camera is done for." Gemma states, placing the broken phone into the box in replace of the updated version. "How did Harry know that you needed a new one?"
Cassidy suddenly feels a miniscule version of something she experienced a long time ago. Something she felt after both times that she and Harry had sex. Nerves. And a dose of guilt. Yet, it's a ridiculous thing to be feeling. This is not the same situation in the slightest. She and Harry are friends, and that's all. And what's more, Gemma knows they are friends. Unlike her lack of awareness of the other incidents. It has to be residual effects from the past, because there is absolutely nothing for her to be worried about.
"We were on a video call when it happened." She replies, finally taking her eyes from her gift and landing them on her best friend, being met with a mildly inquisitive, raised brow.
"Oh, okay." Gemma plainly responds, her simple answer reassuring Cassidy.
"Yeah, me and Cece. I hurt my foot and dropped my phone." She shakes her head in remembrance of the event that felt so tragic when she was in the middle of it. "I told him I couldn't get a new one yet. Apparently he took it upon himself to do just that."
"He's that kind of guy." Her friend explains with a shrug, as if it's something Cassidy should automatically know. But then again, that's all she has been experiencing from him since their friendship started, so she truthfully shouldn't be surprised.
"He didn't need to do this." She utters, still having the instinct to turn down the kind gesture.
"He knows that. But it's not going to stop him. He takes care of his friends and family."
"I'm becoming very aware of that fact." Cassidy exhales with a single, subtle sound of a laugh.
"I'm just glad you two are finally getting along."
The surprise of the comment causes Cassidy's heart to stop along with her breath.
"What?"
Gemma turns her body towards her, rolling her eyes at the question she was just asked, as if the answer should be obvious.
"You two were insufferable around each other when we were kids."
"Well, I mean, he-"
"Oh, don't get me wrong, Harry was definitely a major pest, still is at times to be honest. But, come on, you were exactly the nicest to him either." Gemma explains, and Cassidy can all but keep from readjusting in her seat. "I guess I just thought you both would grow up and grow out of it, and end up… ummm, you know, being friends. Eventually. Or at least not hating each other!"
Flashbacks flood Cassidy's mind as she remembers back to their childhood. Not once did she think that her friend felt anything but the same annoyance that she herself felt.
"Shit. I'm sorry, Gem."
Her friend raises a hand to wave off the apology, as if it wasn't needed, though Cassidy feels otherwise.
"Yeah, well. It was only torture for me, for about twenty years…" She thankfully giggles, helping Cassidy's sudden guilt to lessen in intensity. "So just stay friends for an equal amount of time, at least, and we will call it even."
The thought of being Harry's friend for that long causes Cassidy's stomach to tighten and her lungs to inhale a deep breath. It's a reaction she wasn't prepared for, and one that's indiscernible at the moment. Although, she can acknowledge that it isn't of a negative nature.
"Be around Harry for that long?" She smirks, looking back down to the new phone just gifted to her by the man himself. "I can't make any promises. I already want to clobber him for this!"
•••
The bouncing of her leg does not help the impatience she feels as she waits for the call to be answered from the other end. She double checks the time, hoping that her calculations are correct, and that she can catch Harry as his morning begins.
Suddenly, the ringtone from the video call disappears and her gaze is met by a tousle-haired Harry.
"Oh my god. Did I wake you up?" She immediately questions, her heart racing with worry that she may have disrupted his sleep.
"No. Not at all." He chuckles, a coffee mug being brought up to his lips, covering up the small smile that has appeared at her exasperated question. "And good morning…"
"Good morning." She replies with a sigh of relief, and she notices the smile still stuck on his face when it is revealed to her again. "Umm… I wanted to give you a quick ring to thank you."
"No problem." He quickly states, with a raise of his eyebrow immediately following his words. "Wait, thank me for what?"
Cassidy can't tell if he truly doesn't understand what she is referring to, or if he is arrogantly playing dumb to get her to elaborate, but either way she feels a mild sense of embarrassment creep out onto her cheeks.
"For the chocolates, of course." She jokes, holding up the box that already has half of it's contents consumed. "But mostly for the phone. Harry, you-"
"I'm going to stop you right there." He interrupts, sternly but somehow also sweetly.
"Right. I know. You like doing things for your friends. But come on, Harry. This is not the same as just cooking dinner for us…"
"You needed a new phone, Cass." He states, with a sincere yet still stern tone. "How else was I going to talk to Cece?"
"It was only that back camera that was broken."
"Not just that. Your phone was like one thousand years old. You needed an upgrade." He exclaims with a smirk.
"Coming from the guy who doesn't even use emojis." She jokingly scoffs, drawing out a loud laugh from the man on the other side of her screen.
"Fair enough." He simply replies, being followed by a poking out of his tongue. "Does it work, though? Do you like it?"
Cassidy blinks her eyes as if in disbelief at herself, truly realizing that she has only questioned his generosity, despite ringing to express her gratitude. But also disbelief due to his apparent insecurity about the gesture. Not only does he want to do this for her, but he also wants to make sure she's happy with it, and it's fully taken care of.
"It's great, Harry. Truly. Thank you so much." She responds, a warmth traveling up her neck. "The camera on this one is really good! I've taken so many photos of Cece already!"
Harry's expression brightens at her answer and the heat creeps further up to her face. It's the fact that he helped her, and her thankfulness, that are creating this reaction. As much as she's working on accepting all of this, it's still all new to them.
"You'll have to send me some." He mutters.
"Sure."
A silence falls upon them for a moment, a bit of flickering of their gazes from each person.
"So… do you have anything planned for the day?" Cassidy asks.
She notices him play with his bottom lip, and a more serious expression rapidly displaying across his face.
"Harry…?"
"Umm… yeah, I've got a meeting." He quietly states, and Cassidy senses a sadness in his tone. "Bit worried that I won't be able to tour this year…"
"Oh shit." Cassidy instantly feels her heart hurt for him. She's always known how much he loves that part of his job, and to potentially not be able to do it must be painting him more than he is showing. "I'm so sorry. I know how much touring means to you."
"It's not-..." He sighs, his fingers combing through his hair more than once. "It's not even about me. It's all the people who buy tickets… and flights… and hotel rooms to come see me. It's not fair to them."
Cassidy stays silent as she watches his gaze drop down in a preemptive defeat. She knows there is nothing she can really say to ease his worries. But he's there for her, and she'll be there for him. And if that means sitting in silence on the other end of a video call, that's what she will do. She'll be there for her friend.
•••
She doesn't know if she's ever been more grateful to have a new phone. With the new nationwide, and seemingly worldwide, lockdowns now in place due to the coronavirus, Cassidy has never felt more alone. Besides Cecelia, but there's only so much she can talk about with a 3 year old.
Needless to say, she has already used her phone more than ever before, especially for video chats with her friends. Particularly Harry. Because it seems that not even miles of separation nor a pandemic can break the bond he and Cecelia share.
"I wan' say g'night to Harry…" Cecelia pouts, as she nuzzles into her bed and under her quilt. Her little hands lift up to rub her eyes, deceitfully reassuring Cassidy of her daughter's need for slumber.
"I know, Bug. But it's very late at night for him. He's sleeping."
"M'kay…" The little girl mumbles, the sadness so evident in her tone that it tugs at her mother's heart.
"How about we send him a message, yeah? So he can wake up to it in the morning."
Cecelia's eyes light up as much as possible with the heaviness of the day, and Cassidy props herself up against the headboard.
🗨️ Cassidy: sorry about this being so late… cece wanted to ring you before bed but i told her we would message you to say goodnight… so, goodnight from cece.
"Okay. I told him." Cassidy simply states, locking her screen as she looks down to her daughter, stroking the girl's long locks.
"I miss Harry."
Cassidy's eyes instantly widen at Cecelia's words. She knows the bond they have, but it still manages to catch her off guard at random moments. Not in a negative way, just in how tight that bond is.
"I know you do. He's your friend." Cassidy replies.
"He's my best friend!" She explains, even with her sweetly sleepy voice. "Well, you first. And Emily at school. Harry is after. But… don' say dat part!"
Cassidy can't help but chuckle.
"Okay." She smiles, giving Cecelia one final kiss on her forehead and moving towards the bedroom door. "I won't. Goodnight Bug."
"G'night Mummy. Love you." A little, relaxed sigh leaves her lips.
"I love you, too."
Cassidy closes the door and makes her way back to the living room. She plops down and grabs the remote, letting her body sink into the couch cushions. She smiles as a thought crosses her mind. Despite the horrible things happening in the world, and the chaos that quarantine creates, she still has things to be thankful for. Things that aren't seeming to be affected by any of that negativity. Those things bring her comfort, which is more than welcome these days.
•••
With the sound from a rerun of 'The Great British Bake-off' playing in the background, Cassidy scrolls mindlessly on her phone, attempting to wind down from the day. A sudden buzz causes the device to drop into her lap from surprise, and as she picks it up, she is even more shocked to see that the vibrations are due to a phone call from Harry.
"Good morning!" He states as soon as she answers, not even waiting for her to speak. "Oh. Wait… guess it should be more of a 'good evening' greeting for you…"
"Yes." She quickly pulls the phone back from her ear and checks the time. "It's 9pm here.
"Shit. I'm sorry. Were you asleep?" He asks, his voice going quiet, as if he isn't thousands of miles away in a different country.
"No, no. Just watching the telly." She replies, swearing she can hear his relieved exhale on the other end of the line. "What time is it there?"
"Umm… let me see… it's 5 in the morning."
"Since when do you get up that early?" Cassidy laughs, covering her mouth immediately in hopes that she didn't wake Cecelia. She skipped her nap and really needs her sleep.
There's a pause in the conversation, and Cassidy looks at her screen once again, checking if the call has disconnected, only to find that he is still on the line.
"I haven't been sleeping the best, to be honest. Lockdown has that all out of whack." He mumbles, and it squeezes her chest tight. Everyone has been out of sorts these days. Quarantine is hard on each person in their own way.
"Hey, it's your X-Factor audition anniversary today, isn't it?" She asks, hoping to take him out of the negativity she can tell that he is sitting in. Maybe a good memory will do the trick.
"Umm... yes, it is... how do you remember that?"
Cassidy unintentionally lets out another loud laugh, bending over at her waist at the amount of comedy behind Harry's question, and the certainty of her impending answer.
"Are you joking?" She asks, doing her best to regain control of her breathing, and stay quiet for the sleeping toddler in the other room. "I think that date is ingrained in my brain forever! You wouldn't shut up about it after Anne signed you up!"
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[ flashback - March 2010 ]
For the past several years of her childhood, Cassidy has been subjected to Harry's increasing levels of annoyingness. However, today she feels as if he may have reached his peak.
If she hadn't already heard the news from Gemma herself, it wouldn't have taken long for the information of Harry's upcoming X-Factor audition to be brought to her attention. It felt as if the entire school knew within a matter of minutes.
"Hey, Cass!" Harry shouts out from behind her, causing her to internally cringe at the sound of her name coming from his mouth. It can't mean anything good, at least not for her. It never does.
She stops in her tracks and twists around to find the young lad jogging up to her with a wide grin stretching across his face.
"Did you hear?"
"Hear what?" She asks, playing dumb, though quickly realizing it just creates the opportunity for him to brag, and she internally scolds herself.
"I'm gonna be famous!" He exclaims, and the arrogant statement causes Cassidy to unintentionally scoff. "Hey…"
"You don't even know if you'll be on camera." She replies, knowing full well that the crew will inevitably be drawn to his irritating charm that everyone seems to fall for.
"So you did hear…" His grin widens. "I don't care. I get to sing!"
"You sing all the bloody time!" She reminds him.
"Right. Exactly. People seem to like it. So, I want to see if the judges do too."
"I don't like your singing." She blurts out, not meaning to let her annoyance with him get the best of her and her words. Especially considering the statement wasn't exactly true, though she'd never openly admit that to him.
"That's rubbish… you sing along any time White Eskimo plays..."
"That's because I like the actual songs."
"You can come along… if you want…"
"What?"
"To my audition. You can come along if you want. Robin, Mum, and Gemma will be there."
Cassidy opens her mouth to speak, but no words come out. Is he really inviting her? There's absolutely no reason for her to go, and definitely no reason for him to want her there. Unless it's to feed his growing ego. Maybe even use it as a way to 'prove' to his schoolmates that she 'loves' him, like he continues to lie about. The realization hits and manifests into a strong furrow of her brow.
"March 27th? I think I'll be busy that day."
"Marked it on your calendar already, did you?" His arrogant smirk immediately pulls his left dimple inward. "Might be the last time you get to see me…"
Cassidy cannot help the rolling of her eyes, even if the idea is quite shocking to think about. As her gaze focuses back on him, and sees his smug face, her desire to sass him back quickly reappears.
"Don't get my hopes up Harry."
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[ present - March 2020 ]
"Hey, I was excited!" Harry exclaims, almost as if to verbally pout, as Cassidy chuckles at the memory.
"But I'm pretty sure you weren't supposed to tell anyone at that point. At least not the whole town!" Cassidy pulls her lips inward to hold back another loud laugh threatening to push out.
"I didn't ring you to be teased." He responds, a clear lightness to his tone.
"You should know better by now…" She teases again. "Why did you ring then?"
"I was told someone wanted to talk to me. But… I didn't realize what time it was for you."
Cassidy feels a little smile form with her mouth at the fact that he is so thoughtful to call Cecelia back, yet missing the slightly important detail of what time it is on the other side of the world.
"She just wanted to say goodnight to you."
"I miss that little one." He confesses, and she feels a warmth build up inside her chest. "I miss both of you, I suppose. When you aren't being a bully."
"First off…" Cassidy begins, letting out an amused exhale. "No, that's fair… but you're not missing anything. It's only been a couple of days since we've all talked."
"I'm aware. But I enjoy our chats. They're keeping me sane." Harry replies, and she can practically feel the sincerity to his statement.
"You don't feel sane?" She asks with a small laugh, though genuinely understanding his meaning.
"I just miss everyone. I miss home. Feels a bit lonely over here."
"Aren't you living with a bunch of people right now?"
"That's… yes. But that's not what I mean." He sighs, and she can hear a mild pain in his exhale. "Los Angeles isn't home. Not truly."
"Right. It will be nice to have you around again." Cassidy admits, sensing the mild desire to have had this be a video call, for the sake of displaying a reassuring expression to ease him.
"Did I just hear that correctly? You actually like having me around?"
"Shut up, you twit." Cassidy scolds with a chuckle. "But, it's honestly not the same without you here."
There's a silence that falls between, and Cassidy feels that light comfortability she is becoming accustomed to feeling when she dwells on the good things she still has to keep her going. These talks, and this friendship with Harry, are definitely one of them.
Her attention turns back to him as she hears the clearing of his throat, and she reverts back to being grateful that this call is not a video, as she senses a pink hue rushing to her cheeks.
"I just think that, when I'm finally home in London again, it'll feel like things are getting back to normal."
•••
[ present - June 2020 ]
As nice as it's been to work completely from home for the past few months, and spend more quality time with Cecelia, there is only a certain amount of sanity that someone can maintain while quarantining in general, let alone with an energetic toddler. So, Cassidy jumped at the chance to accept Anne's invite to her home, especially giving her daughter some freedom to go off and play while she chats face to face with another adult.
However, as she sits across from the woman who basically helped raise her, she can sense an awkward nervousness coming from Anne as she strums her fingers on the tea cup.
"I'm still sorry about Mother's Day being canceled." Anne expresses, slightly throwing Cassidy off that her anxiousness seems to be based off of the uncontrollable situation.
"It's not your fault. We went into lockdown!" She giggles, hoping her easy going demeanor helps to ease the unnecessary guilt Anne seems to be feeling.
"I know. It just would've been nice to have one last outing before everything shut down." Anne smiles, small but sweet.
Cassidy stays silent, gazing down to her beverage, the two seemingly understanding the nonverbal agreement. It hasn't been easy, for anyone, despite the rules of lockdown beginning to ease up. She's never been more grateful for open coffee shops and food delivery services, even if masks are required.
"Have you been out much now that we can, you know, go out a bit?" Anne asks.
Cassidy shakes her head slightly and she swallows her sip of tea.
"Haven't had much of a reason to go anywhere, besides the shops, for groceries."
"Oh." Cassidy hears the short reply.
As her eyes gaze back up to Anne, she is met with an unexpected expression, though one she had just been witnessing. The anxiousness has returned, or is still there, she isn't sure which one.
"Is… is there something else bothering you?"
"No, no. Not bothering…"
"But there is something." Cassidy replies, her eyebrow raising immediately.
"Well… it's just that, if you did want a reason to go out… there's this very nice guy, the son of a friend I have, and I thought-"
"Oh, so this was an ambush!" Cassidy states with amusement, but also a little frustration. She knows Anne means well, but she isn't even sure if she's ready for anything like a set up, and certainly wasn't expecting it to come from Anne.
"No, darling! No. I just… you're just a wonderful girl. And from what I know, he seems like a good guy. I just thought you two would have a nice time together…"
"I just don't know if I'm ready to date." Cassidy replies, the truth to her answer apparent to her in the way the thought of such a thing chaotically swirls around in her mind.
"Not ready? I can't even remember the last time you went on one! You definitely haven't since Cece was born!" Anne exclaims, snapping her mouth shut once the words come out, her features filled with regret. "I'm sorry. It's not my place."
"It's okay, Anne." Cassidy places her own hand over Anne's, waiting until their gazes meet.
"I just want you to be happy, CJ."
"I am happy." She reassures her.
"But you deserve to be loved. You deserve someone who absolutely adores you. Who, umm, who thinks the world of you, and never stops feeling that way. Who loves you through anything and everything life has and will put you through."
"Well, I have Cece…" Cassidy giggles, trying to divert the conversation to a more comfortable topic of discussion.
"You deserve someone who will love you both that way." Anne states, and Cassidy can see the emotion manifesting itself as tears form in the corners of her eyes. "I'm surprised you're still single, to be honest. But, if nobody… has tried… that's their loss. It's not as though you need it. A woman doesn't have to have a man to be happy. But, darling, you both deserve all the love in the world."
Anne's beautiful words and pure-hearted expression cause Cassidy's heart to melt. There isn't a sneaky or malicious bone in that woman's body, and she knows Anne is only doing it out of genuine love of her own.
"It doesn't have to be a commitment. Just a date. Or even just a… hang out of sorts." Anne adds, and Cassidy realizes she doesn't think she can reject Anne's offer. Or suggestion. Or whatever it is. She sighs, partially from gratitude but also defeat, and squeezes the hand she's holding.
"Alright." She agrees, watching as Anne tries to hide the way her face wants to light up.
"Alright?"
"I'll meet him." She concedes, every fiber of her body pricked with anxiety.
"Are you sure?" Anne asks, suddenly displaying more timidity than moments before.
Cassidy nods, mostly out of instinct. Anne has the best intentions, but bringing a guy into her life is not as simple as a casual 'hang out'. She has Cecelia. Not every man is open to being in a relationship with someone who already has a child. And Cassidy is more than a little cautious about who she brings into their dynamic. However, she knows that Anne is onto something. Even though she is perfectly content with it being her and Cecelia together, she can admit to herself that having someone else join their little unit wouldn't be the worst thing ever. As long as it's the right person. And she can't know if someone is the right person unless she gets to know them. So she might as well start somewhere, with someone. And if Anne knows this man, that's certainly not a bad place to begin.
•••
Derek is nice.
As planned by Anne, he and Cassidy first met up outside a small cafe, taking caution by social distancing from others, and enjoying the company together outdoors.
He is nice. Smart, successful, good looking, and seemingly uncomplicated.
The last part could be most important, considering that, as a single mother, her life can be the opposite at times.
Though, he seems to be very fond of her. He immediately made his intentions known that he won't see anyone else while they get to know each other. Again, uncomplicated. And any free moment she has, he wants to spend with her.
Which is why they are walking down the corridor to her flat, after he treated her to a very posh picnic in the park.
He guides her to the front door, a warm and strong palm placed on the small of her back, and stops behind her as they reach it.
She spins around, causing his hand to glide to her hip, and she swallows the lump in the throat that developed from the motion. It's been quite a long time since she's been touched like that, in that way.
"Thank you for today." She states quietly, some nerves seemingly getting the best of her.
"I'd like to do something with you tomorrow." He replies, a subtle squeeze of her hip accompanying his statement.
"Oh. I… I have some work to do, unfortunately." Her gaze drops out of unexpected shyness. It's not a lie, she does need to complete a few things, but she always finds herself in a daze after being with him. Dating feels new to her, all over again, and she always feels as if she needs to process their time together. Process the feelings.
His disappointed sigh is halted as the sound of the elevator rings out. They both turn their heads to see the doors open, and watch as Harry walks through them, his head down and his hands behind his back.
His pace slows as he gets halfway down, gazing up to meet the eyes of Cassidy, then shooting them over to the man beside her.
She looks over to Derek, whose expression matches that of her friend's.
"Harry? Harry Styles?"
"Yes…" Harry answers with hesitancy, and Cassidy concludes that he may be nervous about an awkward interaction with a fan.
"It's Derek. Derek Mills." He exclaims, raising his hand to his chest as if to provide visual proof of who he is. As if his identity should be obvious to the other man. "Holmes Chapel Comprehensive!"
Cassidy watches as Harry's eyes widen, flickering between her and the man he has now, apparently, been reintroduced to.
"Derek. Right. How's it going mate?" He asks, giving a blank stare and similarly neutral tone.
"It's going well. Yeah, I'm doing really, really well." Derek replies, giving a smile as his gaze moves to Cassidy before returning to her friend. Potentially his own old friend, though she can't quite be sure.
"Wonderful." Harry states, providing no emotion in his statement. He looks down to his hands after bringing them in front of him, showcasing a beautiful arrangement of flowers that she had somehow missed when the interaction began.
"I didn't realize you two knew each other. Especially considering, you know…" Derek points in Harry's direction. "He's famous."
"Oh, well-"
"We're good friends." Harry interjects. "We've known each other since we were kids."
An uncomfortable silence falls between the three of them, with only the jingling of Cassidy's keys sounding down the corridor.
"Those are nice." Derek states plainly, pointing to the bouquet, matching the tone he has been receiving thus far.
"Oh, right. I, umm, brought these over… for Cece." Harry replies, now keeping his gaze fixated on Cassidy. "Can I give them-"
"Oh." She responds quietly, suddenly feeling a tidal wave of tension filing the space around her. "She's having a little afternoon nap."
"Of course." Harry nods, pinching the bridge of his nose. "I should've remembered it was her nap time. I'm sorry."
"That's okay!" She instantly responds. She waves her finger between herself and the other man beside her. "We were just… saying goodbye. So I can take them inside."
She turns to Derek, being met with pure confusion. Not that it wasn't clear he wasn't being invited inside. That's something Cassidy put a boundary on as soon as he asked to see her again after that first date. So the confusion is most likely regarding this uncomfortable interaction between the three of them.
He gives Cassidy a nod and a quick kiss on her cheek.
"Message me tonight." He states, turning away from her and moving closer to Harry. "Nice to see you again, Harry."
"You too." He utters in reply, not giving the man much acknowledgement as he walks closer to Cassidy, and Derek walks further away.
Harry looks back at the now empty hall, and turns around to meet her stare.
"I didn't know you were… dating anyone…" He states softly, with a familiar timidity that she hasn't heard in a while.
"We've been on a few dates. Nothing too serious right now." She shrugs, rummaging through the bag she has hanging from her shoulder.
"Right. Well, that's… nice..."
"What's with the tone?" She asks, a sternness beginning to attach to her own tone. What reason can he have to be snarky with her?
"I'm a bit surprised that you didn't tell me about this."
As much as Cassidy was just questioning his current, negative demeanor, she didn't expect a real answer. Certainly not that answer.
"I didn't realize it's something you would even want to know…"
"I'm your friend! Of course I want-... I mean… we talked a lot while I was away. Seems like this would be something that came up in conversation…"
She studies his face, watching with uncertainty as he expresses the same sentiment.
"Your mum only introduced us a couple of weeks ago and-"
"My mum set this up?" Harry's eyes widen, just enough for Cassidy to pick up on the movement of his features.
"Yeah…" She replies, still sensing a sliver of the snarky tone he had used moments before. "She thinks I'm not happy. Or… wants me to be happier, at least. She wants me to have more love in my life."
"Love?" Harry immediately straightens his posture and his eyes widen with, what looks like, a curious shock.
"Well, god, one step at a time please…"
"So, do you like him?" He utters, a volume that almost caused Cassidy to miss his question.
"I suppose so." She shrugs. Her answer would truthfully be that she does, but that suddenly feels as if it would be a troublesome response to give at this moment.
"You suppose so?"
"He's a nice guy."
"Did you even know him in school?" He asks, passive aggressively at best.
"No… he was in the year ahead of mine. What's that got to do with-"
"I just don't remember him being a nice guy."
"In school? Harry, that was ages ago." She chuckles, trying to ignore the once familiar frustration making itself known. "I don't particularly remember you being at your best back then either."
"Yes, but that's-... it's just that, I-" He stutters, swallowing harshly and running his fingers through his hair as he clears his throat. "You're right. I wasn't."
"And look at you now. Bloody hell, look at us both now! I hang out with the biggest pop star in the world!" Cassidy exclaims, delighting in the comedic truth to the statement, even if it's not the real heart of their reconciliation. "But, moreso, I'm your friend. We are friends. People change, Harry."
"True." He utters in response. "I just… I'm looking out for you."
"I appreciate it. But you don't need to worry about me, I can handle myself." She smiles, standing up straighter to further display her confidence. "I'd like to think I have a good judge of character."
Harry opens his mouth, but quickly closes it, rubbing the back of his neck with his free hand.
"So… did you only come over to bring Cece some flowers?" Cassidy gives a small smile, still feeling an odd, mild tension in the air, but hoping the change of subject eases it away.
"Well, no. Since I just got back into town, I was going to invite you both over to my place." He returns her smile with one of his own, but the attempt still doesn't give her the reassurance she needs. "But since Cece's asleep, maybe another day then."
"Sure! Tomorrow?"
He hands over the bouquet and brings one hand up to fiddle with his lower lip, crossing the other around his waist, and furrowing his brow in thought.
"Yes. Tomorrow afternoon will work just fine."
Harry gives her a slight nod, along with a matching smile, and turns back to walk down the corridor. Cassidy watches as he gets back on the lift, his expression still seeming to be one of deep concentration on whatever his mind is dwelling on, and she begins to feel an uneasiness in her chest that she wasn't expecting to materialize between the two of them.
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[ flashback - July 2014 ]
Dragged to yet another One Direction concert in London. That's where Cassidy finds herself with Gemma. It's annoying, at this point, that she so easily caves to her best friend's request of joining her, when she never wants to attend any of their shows. Not fully anyway.
And this time is worse, because Gemma managed to convince Cassidy to hang out backstage before the show, rather than after when she can use exhaustion as an excuse to get out of there quickly.
"So, what's new?" Niall asks her, scooting closer to her as they both lean against one of the dressing room walls.
"Not much really." She shrugs, considering the fact that her life is nowhere near as exciting as the one they lead.
"She's being modest." She hears coming from her right, feeling her friend nudge her with an elbow as Gemma walks up beside her. "She's finishing up at uni and then doing an internship for a place in Manchester!"
"That's amazing, Cassidy!" Niall exclaims, giving her a cheeky wink.
She simply shrugs, still highly aware of the company this news is being given to, knowing that this megastar's reaction is out of politeness.
"And she started seeing someone…" Gemma adds, causing Cassidy to shoot a strong, scolding glare in that direction.
"You're dating? Who are you dating?" A voice asks, and Cassidy turns her gaze to see Harry walking over from the other side of Niall, leaning one shoulder against the wall with his arms crossed over his body.
Who does he think he is to assume he has the right to even know the details of the new relationship she is in?
"You don't know him." She growls through her teeth.
"I might…"
"You don't."
She watches Harry look over to his sister, and out of the corner of her eye, sees the confirmation Gemma gives him. As if Cassidy's answer wasn't enough, or wasn't the truth. As if he knew better than to take her word for it. That arrogant prick.
"Does he know you know me?" His annoyingly famous smirk immediately appears after his words come out.
"Why would I tell him that?"
"Just don't want him to get jealous." He states, tapping Niall on the shoulder, obviously looking for someone to agree with his comedic statement, but only, and thankfully for Cassidy, receiving a shake of Niall's head.
"There's nothing to be jealous of."
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[ present - June 2020 ]
The sound of chopping can instantly be heard as Cassidy and Cecelia enter through the front doors to Harry's house.
"In here!" They hear coming from the kitchen, and as they turn the corner, Cassidy is met with the view of Harry busying himself around the room.
"Can I go ou'side?" Cecelia asks, looking between her mother and their host.
"Of course!" Harry immediately exclaims, not bothering to check with Cassidy, even though her answer would be the same. She smiles at the comfort and normality of it all now, and realizes that it may never cease to cause her heart to fill up with so many good feelings. Happiness qand gratitude being the main emotions. "I could use your help picking some pretty flowers to put on the center of my dining table…"
The little girl's eyes light up, nodding at the suggestion and skipping her way outside.
"What have you got going on over here?" Cassidy asks as she turns back to Harry and moves into the kitchen, finding different foods sprawled out across the counter.
"Just… a small charcuterie selection…" He replies, laying cheese slices on the middle of the board.
"You didn't hav-... it looks delicious, Harry!" She states. Clearly she is still learning to accept his generous gestures, though that is one thing she may never get used to. She has spent so many years having to do anything and everything herself, that it is still doesn't feel entirely normal for her to have someone else do something for her.
"I have some wine over there if you'd like to pour yourself a glass." He gestures behind him, not taking his focus away from the food in front of him.
Cassidy walks over to the opposite counter of where he stands, picking up the one bottle he has pulled from his collection, and reading over the very intricate label.
"Are you sure you want to open this one? It looks pretty fancy."
"It's just a bottle of red wine, Cass."
"It's a 1982. That's older than me! And it says 'rouge'… I consider that pretty fancy. But then again, I'm not the famous Harry Styles. I usually just go for the cheap Zinfandel or a pink Moscato." Cassidy giggles, looking up from the bottle in her hand to find Harry lacking the amusement that she herself is finding in her statement.
"Oh I'm aware." He replies, rolling his eyes in a very sarcastic nature.
"But maybe this pinot will wash away your 'grumpy old man' mood…"
Harry's gaze shoots up from his task, displaying wide eyes, as if he hadn't been clueless of his previous, serious expression, or the sourness in his tone. Although, she is almost positive that he knows.
"What?"
Cassidy scoffs out a laugh and shakes her head, choosing to move past his clear pout over her beverage commentary.
"Nothing. I just think you should save this one for another time. A better occasion."
He shrugs. Simply shrugs, and arranges the final few strawberries with the other fruits, as Cassidy finds a less extravagant wine for the both of them to consume. One that is more relatable to her more normal lifestyle.
"Shall we?" He asks, nodding in the direction of beautiful back doors, leading out to an even more beautiful backyard.
Cassidy grabs the glasses and they exit, each finding a comfortable spot on his patio furniture, both close enough to the outside table and within reach of the lovely food spread he has created.
"So, catch me up. What's… what's new in your life?" Harry asks, taking his glass and then a sip of wine, seemingly hiding his expectant expression, though failing to keep it from Cassidy.
"Well, considering we saw each other yesterday…" She giggles mildy. "Nothing."
"Right." He scoffs within a chuckle of his own. "But it wasn't much of a conversation, and I have been away…"
"We also talked multiple times a week, you pest. Besides not actually being around, and considering we couldn't do much anyway, you didn't miss anything."
"Don't know, it feels like I did." He mumbles. "With… with everyone."
Her gaze flickers over to him, noticing the way he has begun to run his teeth along his bottom lip, staring out to the backyard view.
"I bet it feels good to finally be back home then, yeah?"
"It does. Yes." He utters in response, a quietness that feels a little surprising to Cassidy, considering how desperate he seemed to leave Los Angeles and return to London. "I won't be able to settle in too much though."
"What do you mean?"
"Well, I'm… I'm actually headed to Italy soon."
"That sounds amazing! How soon?"
"Umm…" He runs his fingers through his hair and his gaze drops as he swirls the beverage around in his glass. "I'm leaving next week."
"Next week?" She exclaims, turning to face him completely. "Wow. I feel like you just got back home."
"I know." He softly states, giving nothing more than that simple response.
"What are you going for?" She feels her brow furrow slightly, the expression caused by the confusion she feels throughout herself. However, she lightens her features, even if just to ease her own mind. "Finding even more pretentious wine?"
"Of course." He replies with a simple smile, very unlike his usual grin, or smirk. "And, umm, I guess to also figure out what I want to do next. Maybe write a song or two, if inspiration strikes."
"And you can't do that here? At home?"
"I need a clear head. Free from distractions."
The confusion grows and a worry begins to build alongside it, though she isn't quite sure why. He's a grown man. He can do whatever and go wherever he wants to, it doesn't affect or involve her in any way. Except that, to an extent, it does.
She looks over to Cecelia, who is completely comfortable at Harry's home, and completely content digging around in the garden outside.
Her gaze quickly shoots down to her fingers as they begin to fidget with the stem of her wine glass, then slowly moves back over to him.
A realization falls over her. She's a bit sad. For Cecelia, who just got her best friend back, but also for herself. She just got her friend back too. Her other best friend. Now he's headed off again, and another realization hits her. Their lives are so different. As much as she sees him as the Harry she knew as a kid, he is not just that. And for the first time since they became friends, she worries that it could change things. Change what they now have.
"Right." She utters, still caught up in her thoughts. "Free from distractions."
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Series Masterlist
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toomanybandstocare · 2 years
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{I Don't Believe in Love, Queensrÿche}
Program: Coming home from college should have meant you had all the time in the world to hang out with your best friend. Coming home, you should have been greeted with a hug and promise of summer fun. Coming home, you found the love of your life finally got the girl of his dreams. Instead, heartbreak greeted you with open arms.
Pairing: Best friend!Eddie Munson x GN, in love!Reader, slight Steve Harrington x Reader if you squint
Genre: Angst, Heartbreak
Warnings: couple of swears, drug use (just weed), angst, unrequited love, heartbreak
Length: 2027w
Series Program | Camp Upside Down Masterlist
“You’re in love with him,” Steve whispers almost like he’s afraid. What did he have to fear when you have everything to lose?
Stood frozen, unable to tear your eyes away from the new couple in the living room, your heart screams for the arms of your best friend. To finally return home after another year of sparse letters and scattered phone calls. Eyes stinging as you watch your love embrace someone else. Wondering if the stress of your final year at college drove the two of you apart, once known as the inseparable duo, or if it’s because he was accepted by the girl of his dreams at long last. Clutching the soda can as if it’s your last grasp on reality, you force out the breath caught in your throat to try to alleviate the burning in your chest. Pain scorches your insides leaving stinging pin pricks along every ticked off nerve in your body. Engulfed by a brew of overwhelming emotions - a concoction of devastation, anger, and numbness mix in the empty mold of your heart. Leaving you only to drown in the radiance of the couple’s happiness and tender care.
The chain around your neck quickly coils closer and tighter to suffocate any noise that tries to escape with your response.
“If I wasn’t, I wouldn’t be wearing his ring on a necklace that has a typewriter key of my first initial,” you choked out, “I wouldn’t have kept a piece of him next to my heart and soul, if he was truly just my best friend”.
Steve had slowly made his way next to you and firmly wrapped his arms around your trembling body. He takes you in- looks past the brave face you put on and sees the broken lover desperately trying to hold on. Never has he seen you look this hurt in the number of fights you had encountered against the Upside Down, and Steve is terrified that you’re about to shatter before his eyes.
Eyes darting from your blank stare to the couple who had become the center of all attention, Steve so desperately wants to take away your pain. To take you away from the cause. If he held you any tighter - any closer - you would have thought you were at death’s door.
But that love, isn’t it? It lights up your entire world in a beautiful glow. Love is all consuming as it spreads its reach from fleeting thoughts to endless daydreaming.
Until it’s soul crushing. Until it erases absolutely every other meaning of your life. When its warm touch suddenly blazes, and you’re left with memories that burn.
“We can leave. We- we can get out of here. I’m so sorry,” his voice cracked. As if he’s personally responsible for your heartbreak. As if he’s holding Chrissy so tenderly in his arms, rather than Eddie.
Taking a deep breath to extinguish the flaring hurt spreading through your system as best as you could, you redirect your undivided attention to meet Steve’s pain expression with your teary eyes. You stitch up a smile, “It’s okay, Steve. I would have to be naive to think no one would notice him after all these years and finally fall for him. Even a place like Hawkins can’t turn a blind eye to the stunning beauty that is Eddie Munson”. Sniffling as Steve delicately wipes away a stray tear, you choke out, “Eddie Munson, my best friend. Light of my life”.
Absorbed as you pull away from his safe hold and sculpt a new deflective mask, Steve watches as you lock away your heart. He wants to scream. He wants to get down on his knees and beg you to stop rebuilding your walls. Steve wants you to reach out to him - to someone, to anyone - and allow him to help you grieve while learning to move on. He wants you to rip off the guise you have too quickly thrown back on to bury your emotions under a perfect smile and deflective chuckle.
With what could have looked like gleaming excitement to anyone else, you look him right in the eye. “Ready to join the rest of the group, Steve-O?”
He breathes out a half hearted laugh and looks at you with a pained look. “I feel like I should be the one asking you that. To check if you're ready and okay to head over.”
“Then get a grip, Harrington,” you joke, “I want to catch up on missed time with everyone”.
Taking his hand, you walk towards the living room and take in the comforting familiarity that mixes with unknown terrain. Dustin, Will, Mike, and Lucas sit on the floor in front of the couch with character sheets strewn amongst them. Sat behind them and arguing over stat choices, Eddie bends over to get a better look. Chrissy sits on the end of the couch with Eddie’s arm securely wrapped around her as she watches the boys in amused confusion and laughs at their banter. Robin and Max join in the argument from the other side of the couch only to spur on the boys further with the joke suggestions. An almost picture perfect memory.
Across from the main group taking up the couch, Jonathan and Nancy sit on the love seat. As the pair of you approach, they turn to swiftly include you in the ongoing shenanigans with welcoming smiles only to freeze taking in your drastically different attitudes. Jonathan opens his mouth to try to say something, but the words can’t form a coherent thought when met with your plastic smile. Nancy looks to Steve in hopes of an answer only to be met with his hard stare. Seeing the couple openly share their affection, they knew it would only be a matter of time for you to realize why you had to ask them about your best friend rather than hearing from him yourself. The two of them swiftly move to opposite sides of the couch to make room, and Steve perches on the back of the seat with his legs spread enough for you to sit between them on the seat. Keeping his gaze locked and as calm as possible, Steve clasps a hand on your shoulder and rubs gentle circles with his thumb. Nancy immediately puts her hand on your knee leaning over Steve’s outstretched leg to be closer to you, and Johnathan turns to face you better.
If you were going to seal yourself off then they were going to come at your walls from all sides. But they were going to do it on your terms. If you just wanted a night in with your friends, they’ll be damned if you didn’t get that.
Johnathan reached into his backpack at his feet and pulled out a few cassette tapes and a metal tin. “I remember you liked The Clash, right?” he mutters fumbling with everything as he looks for the right tape. “I just got my hands on a copy of Cut the Crap. We could steal the stereo for a bit- I highly doubt they’ll notice the music selection improvement based on how long they’ve been at this,” he jokes.
“Yeah, that sounds fun,” you respond dazed and distracted by the shiny tin, “I got a chance to to listen to it with a buddy back at school- I think you’d like him -before I came back. But, ah, what’s that?” you point to the tin.
He sheepishly looks between you and Nancy while rubbing the back of his neck, “It’s- it’s my stash tin. Couple of pre-rolls”. He hesitantly holds it out to you, “Want to step outside for a bit?” Nancy sighs knowing that it would probably help. Steve merely squeezes your shoulder, silently trying to convey that he would be here for you. That it was okay if you wanted to sneak out and he would take care of you.
You nod, standing up almost mechanically like you were going through the motion of actions. Jonathan reaches over to press a kiss to Nancy’s cheek as you softly smile at Steve’s serious expression. You shrug, “Helps shut off the extra voices and thoughts up here,” tapping the side of your head. “S’not a habit and won’t become one,” you breathe out and notice his gaze slightly soften.
You look at Johnathan, who stands up from his hushed conversation. Making your way out of the living room and back into the kitchen, you stop abruptly when your siren’s voice calls out your name. You can’t help turn to face his twinkling eyes.
“Are you doing a kitchen run?” Eddie asks with a glint of playfulness. You raise an eyebrow, “Why? Too comfy to get a refill yourself?” you tease. Out of the corner of your eye, you see Steve choke on his Coke while trying to hold in his laughter. Because, fuck, you are not holding anything back even if you choose to hide the truth behind those words. “Unfortunately for you, bud, we’re heading out back for a minute. Fresh air or something,” you chuckle.
Eddie’s eyebrows crease together, and he notices the tin in Johnathan’s hand. Meeting your gaze again, “Since when did you start smoking? You never wanted to in the past”.
“Yeah, in high school. You try new things in college. Stuff happens. People change,” you wave your hand in indifference.
“You said you wouldn’t smoke- seemed pretty set with that and only helping out people get their fix if they were going through something,” he huffed. Everyone’s eyes were bouncing between the two of you as the tense static of unease settled in the air.
“Maybe I became one of those people,” you pause, letting the words hang in the air and sink in. “Or, maybe I need something to help distract myself from the DJ’s poor selection tonight,” you tease.
He gapes at you as everyone bursts into chuckles and laughter. “I have phenomenal taste, thank you very much. We basically have the same taste, you little shit. You can’t say that,” he laughs though slightly still on edge.
You wink and turn back to make your way further into the house hoping to get out before another near catastrophic conversation starts.
“Oh, when you come back, I want to properly introduce you to Chrissy,” he shouts.
Walking as fast you can without damn near sprinting, you slide the glass door open and set out onto the back deck. The two of you wander to the lounge chairs and recline looking up at the starry night sky.
Johnathan takes out a joint from the tin and pulls out a lighter from his jean pocket, pausing to think, before handing them to you. “Don’t isolate yourself,” he quietly begs, “Please”. Focusing on the temporary warmth of the lighter, you take a deep inhale. The first hit of many to come. Jonathan stares at you, taking in your calm expression watching the stars flicker above.
“Have you ever heard of a band called Queensrÿche?” your voice wavered. You couldn’t bring yourself to meet his hopeful gaze.
“No, I don’t.” He sat up and fully turned his body towards you.
“I’ve been fucking with them lately. Seems to speak to my soul. Got a tape of theirs that we could throw on.” you choke out after another hit.
He lit up. You weren’t shutting them out. “Yeah, yeah! We can- we can put it on. We’ll raincheck our Clash listening party. What’s your favorite song by them? Is it included on the tape?” Jonathan has only had a few hits, but he isn’t going to call you out for stealing the joint. He isn’t going to risk you shutting in again. You’re smiling again- it looks genuine to him. You’re working through the pain- not hiding.
You hum and take another hit before handing him the joint. When your fingertips meet, you peer over to him. He looks so happy and proud. So glad that you’re engaging. Squeezing your eyes shut, you shift your focus back to the dark expanse of the sky.
“Yeah, it’s called 'I Don't Believe in Love’”, you confidently state.
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anotherbluesunday · 11 days
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✨Teaser: In Technicolor✨
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So some of you may know this, but my next fic that was set to release was originally called “Ballad of a Teenage Dream” and was a Wednesday x Skam crossover that showcased all the highs and lows of high school and the growing pains that come with the transition from teenager to young adult.
Well that story has been reworked, overhauled, and given new life.
I present to you my high school dramady, In Technicolor.
Set in Los Angeles, California, the story follows two groups of friends as their worlds collide. A modern spin on the social dynamics of Romeo and Juliet where two factions are warring but cannot remember why or why their bitter rivalry is so important to their identity, In Technicolor highlights the feuding of the wealthy and the everyday citizens to show the consequences that come from stripping culture and history from the city streets in the name of gentrification. It explores the complex relationships of families on either side of the fence to reveal that wealth does not always bring happiness. And finally, at the center of it all, the complicated friendships and relationships of the members of these two groups as they meld into one.
For our East LA champions, we follow the Addams siblings and their mismatched group of skateboarders, graffiti artists, musicians, and street racers.
For our Palisades elite, we focus on the Blossoms and Galpin’s—two families from extreme wealth that are not entirely honest about what they show the world.
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Important Story Information: If the visuals were not enough to give it away, this story will be a crossover with a different fandom. Entering the mix is the ensemble from Riverdale. I do want to caution readers now, there will be crossover pairings, character retcon on both sides, ageing up, ageing down, and changes to character personalities.
One such example is that Wednesday isn’t allergic to color and isn’t entirely unapproachable. She smiles and laughs but only when around those she trusts like her family and friends. Pugsley has been aged up and is Wednesday’s twin brother. My face claim for this version of Pugsley is Xolo Mariduẽna and I have made Pugsley (who also will be going by “Lee”) more confident and hotheaded with some snark and sass. Second to that, my face claim for Pubert “Bertie” Addams is Malachi Barton and Pubert/Bertie will be one year younger than his siblings—the twins Wednesday and Pugsley age 17 and in their senior year and Bertie age 16 entering his junior year.
On the Riverdale side of the crossover, I have made certain changes that I don’t want to reveal just yet for Archie’s character. That surprise will come soon enough because next I will be posting moodboards for specific couples that will be at the center of this story. But one change I will discuss now to get it out there to avoid hate comments and harassment is the issue of is Cheryl bi or is she a lesbian. In my story, she’s bi and will be paired with a male lead. I understand that the actress for her character went back and forth on Cheryl’s orientation but, to me, Cheryl reads like a chaotic bisexual that goes back and forth on her identity because being bi is confusing enough. And as someone who is bi, I would like to see more representation and fiction for people like myself because fandoms are so quick to erase bisexuality and pansexuality and criticize us when we speak up about it. So in this story, Cheryl is bi and she has broken up with her most recent girlfriend before meeting her next partner who is a man. And it’s fine.
If this upsets you, just swipe off of this post. Don’t leave mean comments or take digs at me because I’m not for any of this fandom infighting nonsense. It’s fiction and these characters can be whatever you want them to be in your stories.
However, if you don’t mind Cheryl liking both men and women, you don’t have an opinion either way, or your curious to see how this’ll pan out, stay tuned. I’d love to share this story with you. All are welcome so long as things stay civil and breezy.
So with that, I look forward to updating with the couple’s board and then the first chapter titlecard along with the chapter itself. Until then, stay lovely and stay groovy.💜
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halbravd · 2 years
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into darkness // halbrand, sauron.
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summary: galadriel knows, and halbrand is running out of time. but he has one last card to play.
content warning: minors do not interact, gender neutral and female bodied reader, unprotected sex, creampie, choking, biting, corruption.
word count: 2k
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All you can remember is his hand gripping your arm with a strength that had your entire body shivering, a few words whispered into your ear and his heavy footsteps leading you to the bedroom the elven king gifted him during his stay here in Eregion. You could have told him to stop: that his nails digging in your skin hurts, that he doesn’t have to walk that fast — but you didn’t. Torn between anxiety and excitement, you obediently followed the man you’ve ever had eyes for, not asking a single question.
Door locked, thick silence surrounded you both for a few seconds before he finally let go of your arm, cupping your face with his hands — Ridiculously big for a face as small as yours. They could crush you in a matter of seconds if he wanted to, strong and skilled, rough and crafted by the god — or the evil — himself.
‘You said you’d follow me wherever I go.’ Breaking the silence, he dares to ask, even if there is not a single trace of hesitation in his voice. He shouldn’t be asking questions he knows the answer to, yet, it doesn’t seem like he cares anymore.
‘I will,’ you whisper, blinded by both admiration and love for the man standing right in front of you. It was stupid, wasn’t it? To fall for someone you barely know. Someone you met a few weeks ago — Someone who seemed to care for that elf, anyone, but you. You had to beg to come with them, to let your dignity vanish in the air for a man who would barely look at you, as if you weren’t good enough for him. As if you didn’t exist in his world.
But now, things have changed. His eyes boring into your soul, his hands caressing your cheeks, the corner of his lips gently raised into the softest of smiles. A smile just for you, no one else, just for once. And your heart dropped as soon as his lips crashed on top of yours — a messy and filthy kiss where his teeth sank into your flesh, where his tongue invaded your mouth without warning and where his hand on your nape didn’t allow you to push him away. It’s all lips and teeth, a kiss so vile you can barely follow the rhythm, butterflies swirling around in your stomach and gifting you with a warmth you’ve never felt before.
‘I knew you would be the only one to understand me. I knew you’d be perfect.’ His words, sweet and poisonous, had your heart missing a beat. Your head is spinning, blood creeping up your cheeks as you slightly open your mouth, only for your words to flee, leaving you breathless.
‘Perfect… For what?’ You gather enough courage to ask, voice breaking halfway through your sentence, completely clueless. In the mean time, Halbrand led you to the bed, in the center of the room. With his hands on your shoulders, he only had to apply a slight pressure for you to sit on it, his tall right in front of you.
‘To be my queen.’ It made you feel stupid, how he said those words with such ease… Like it was such an obvious choice for him. His hands were already working on the buttons of your robe, getting rid of them one by one as you stand there, in utter shock. Eyes wide, throat dry, his words echo in your mind over and over again until you can process them.
Oblivious, it was a mistake from your part to see yourself as the queen of the Southlands. But that sounded so nice to ear, so nice to feel it roll on your tongue — Queen of the Southlands. What he has in mind is polar opposite, but why would he shatter your hopes and dreams when you look so pretty in your own disillusion?
In a ridiculously short amount of time, your body is fully exposed to him. And for a moment, Halbrand realizes there is still purity in this world, something he can’t wait to pull into the darkness of his own being. His eyes are everywhere all at once: Your swollen lips from the messy kisses you two shared, your pretty neck that begged to me marked.
You’re too stunned to help him undress himself, but your eyes wouldn’t miss a single second of that show he puts on for you. You didn’t even blink once, muttering a few incoherent words to yourself — Too drunk, too intoxicated to really understand what is going on.
Kneeling on the bed, the mattress sinks ever so slightly because of his weight, his tall figure now right in between your thighs. Seated on his heels, the palm of his hands gently creeps up your legs, stopping on your knees so they could spread you wide open just for him. It feels like your lungs are on fire, unable to keep the air they’re so desperately longing for as his eyes fall on your gorgeous face once again.
The tip of his cock prods at your entrance, pulling the softest gasp out of your parted lips — He wants more. He needs more of it. And it takes all of his damn strength not to ruin you on the spot, not to wreck your body until there’s nothing but blood and bones left.
‘I’ll be gentle, I promise.’ An other lie, enough to soothe your fear. The soft kisses he left on your ankle are delicate, almost too gentle to feel real and sincere. But in the mindset you’re in, the red flags are way too far to be seen. Why the sudden change of allegiance? Why does he suddenly care so much about you? Why you, and not an other? So many rational questions you forgot to ask yourself. So many answers that could have saved your soul.
Slowly, his hips move forward, guiding his cock with his right hand to fill you all nicely. It stings and it hurts, it has your body shaking and your eyes rolling at the back of your skull, fingers tightly gripping the sheets beneath you for leverage. Eyes fluttered shut, you can only sob when he finally bottoms out, the feeling of being so full, overwhelming. Halbrand leans forward, his lips finding your closed eyelids only for them to kiss the thin layer of skin. He hasn’t moved yet, waiting for your body to relax to finally ruin you. He’s patient, and waiting a few more seconds won’t be the death of him, after centuries of standing in the shadow.
‘Look at me.’ He mutters, his hand gripping your hip and keeping you in place when you tried to move underneath him. His hold is strong, so strong it pins you down and you’re unable to move anymore. So you do as you’re told, weakly opening your eyes, met with a blurry vision of the man you’re bonded to.
With a simple nod of your face, he knows. Rocking his hips against yours, his face soon disappears in the crook of your neck, a fight of lips, tongue and teeth biting, sucking and licking hot flesh of yours. His cock drags against your gummy walls, only the tip of it still inside before he thrusts back in, rough and fast. It steals the air off your lungs, moans shamelessly tumbling out of your mouth, a whisper of his name and a few meaningless babbles.
Legs wrapped around his hips and fingers messily gripping a fistful of his hair, you let him murder that innocence you’ve been keeping with you for so long, replaced by a darkness you can’t even see yet.
‘Say you’ll be mine forever. Say it.’ He spits, bitterness in his voice as he gets back on his knees, your bare body on full display for his filthy eyes. His right hand wrapped around your throat like the most glorious collar you’ll ever wear, he’s applying enough pressure for you to gasp out loud, obstructing your windpipes until you can no longer breathe. Your hands hopelessly find his, eyes watering from the pressure as his thrusts become more and more erratic, bringing you closer to your downfall. And you clench around him, so vile it has him grunting from the sudden tightness.
‘I will— I swear I will,’ you cry, strangled sob leaving your lips as his hand finally lets go of your throat, heading south and gripping your breast.
‘You’ll rule middle earth with me, and you’ll never escape from me. If you ever try, I will burn that sweet village of yours down.’ Those eyes of him, darkened by desire and hatred, are nothing but the gates of hell. His scorching touch a mere taste of what is yet to come. But you nod, pathetically, almost way too fast. Fat tears falling down your cheeks, he relishes in the way you’re slowly breaking down, not even bothering to fight anymore.
And when his cock bumps against that particular spot, you’re done for — And you’ve never experienced something as devastating, as beautiful and as ravaging — It feels like a wildfire is spreading through your entire body, like you’re sent to a foreign world and for a moment, you can’t hear, see or feel anymore. A silent cry leaves your throat as your back arches painfully, the grasp he has on your hips so strong and cruel it will leave bruises and scratches for days. All you know is his name, and witnessing your own fall was something he never thought would happen so soon — so easily.
His hips stutter, then come to a full stop when he finally releases his fluid inside you, painting your walls white and soiling your insides in a low grunt. The pleasure he has felt had nothing to do with the one of the flesh — It was the one of corrupting such a pure and angelic soul, turning it into something dark and malevolent. Something fitting his twisted fantasies.
A queen of the darkness, of pain and nightmares. Anything but holy. Leaning forward, his forehead against yours, an evil smirk pulls the corner of his lips up — a grin that sent shivers down your spine, that made you feel so uncomfortable you wish you could have run away from here, as far as possible.
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taglist: @idwtet @killsandthrills @missscarlett1802 @sleepingpillsworld @kryss-tethras @atruthuniversallyunacknowledged @bookfrog242
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she-is-juniper · 1 year
Text
temptation greets you like your naughty friend (joel miller x reader) // chapter one
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pairing: joel miller x fem!reader chapter title: the arrangement summary: joel miller likes to be made to feel in control; reader like to be made to feel helpless. thus, an arrangement is born, no strings attached. but there’s more than meets the eye to this gruff survivor.... This story takes place in the Boston QZ roughly 10 years after the outbreak begins, and Reader and Joel are business partners in the illegal smuggling trade. word count: 5K rating: E (Explicit) ***18+ only. minors DNI or you will be blocked. content/warnings: there’s a lot…. dom!Joel, no use of y/n, unprotected sex, established relationship, age gap (reader is in her 20s, Joel in his late 40s), oral s*x (f receiving), squ*rting, some degradation/humiliation but in a lighthearted way, some begging, a splash of a “sir” kink, some angst and resolution, porn with a bit of a plot, spanking, power play (all of this is consensual). Also Tess exists but she and Joel are not together a/n: ah, yes, the fanfic to end a hiatus... ♡ I recommend reading this one before bed so you can, yknow, have nice wet dreams about it while you sleep. to my long time readers/fans: hiii i missed y'all! to my new readers/fans: enjoyyy and please reach out to introduce yourself! i’m always looking to make new friends ◡̈ ((I do not claim to own the last of us or any other affiliated names or fictional events. Other details, such as names, locations, and events, are also fictionalized. Please note that the representations of body types in my moodboard are not intended to exclude anybody of any race, ethnicity, or body shape. And please, for the love of all that is holy, comment/reblog/send asks if you want to see more of my writing—it’s the only form of repayment i ask for!!! thank you in advance!))
———
A hardened man like Joel Miller has a lot to offer a woman like you. Particularly in the form of desperate, mind-numbing sex.
The kind of sex that makes you forget your own name. Makes you forget the sting of whatever injuries you’d suffered this week at the hands of thugs and hunters. Not to mention, makes you forget, even if just for an hour or two, the fact that you’re living in the aftermath of the apocalypse in a world savaged by infected monsters.
That’s the kind of sex you and Joel both crave. The kind that takes away the crushing weight of repressed memories and feelings. The kind of sex where there’s nothing left to think about but the way his cock fills you up and his lips steal the breath from your lungs. The kind of sex that, after a day’s worth of decision fatigue as Tess’s right-hand woman as a contraband smuggler in the Boston QZ, you finally don’t have to make a single decision for yourself, as your pleasure is entirely in Joel’s expert hands.
Just sex, nothing else. Plain and simple. That’s the arrangement as you know it. No cuddling in bed after, no exchanging tender kisses, no talking about your feelings or any bullshit like that. Just rough, dirty sex to get your minds off the shittiness of your lives.
No shame. Everyone who’s survived the pandemic thus far has found their own unique means of self-medication. For some, it’s drugs, or alcohol, or murder. For you and Joel, it’s fucking.
As for when the encounters would take place, it depends on the day or week. Today, after a particularly shitty week for the both of you, all it takes is a mutual look shared from across the room in the rations distribution center.
You’re near the front of the rations line when you spot him coming in toward the back. Joel surveys the crowded hall, the line of his brows furrowed into his signature harsh scowl. You meet the man’s gaze with glassy eyes of your own. In that moment you swear you notice his frown soften as he looks at you, although a tendon tightens on his temple. It’s a look that confirms he’s had just as god awful a week as you had, although there’s something more there today that you can’t quite put your finger on. 
You look away and sigh, wincing a little at the pain from a bruised rib that’s only just started to heal. Your injury’s pretty mild, though, and nothing compared to the state you’d left the other guy in. Oh, well. At least you got a few extra ration cards out of it, which you now hand to the FEDRA officer in exchange for a box of supplies and provisions. Mostly non-perishable food, but there’s also some medicines, toiletries, socks, soap—thank fuck, more soap.
On your way out of the hall, you meet Joel’s gaze once more. Not a word is exchanged, but with an almost imperceptible nod of his chin, you know you’ll be hearing his knock at your door at 2300 sharp. God knows you need his specific methods of distraction right now.
– – –
Three raps of his knuckles against your apartment door at 2300 exactly, and Joel’s all over you.
It happens so fast. As soon as you open the door, Joel seizes you by the arms and spins your body with his, slamming your body to the door with his own momentum to close it shut. Your sore rib burns from the impact and you hiss, “Ouch, asshole.”
“Toughen up, princess,” he growls. There’s nothing endearing about the pet name, it’s not like that. In fact, he says it almost demeaningly, which is on par for your relationship with the smuggler. But there’s a primal sort of desperation in the tone of his voice, and your arousal at that prospect spreads over your whole body and finds a home right in between your legs.
Joel’s hands wrench your arms above your head and pin them there as his mouth attacks yours, effectively muffling the surprised squeal that emits from your throat. His mouth is hot, his grown-out stubble scratching the delicate skin of your face in a delicious contrast, his breath faintly spiced from whiskey. You melt into him, arching your body into his, and a surly grunt resonates from his throat. He gathers your wrists in one hand pinned to the door and brings his free hand down to the nape of your neck, not so gently pulling at the base of your hair. He pulls away from the kiss and regards your exposed neck, where you swear he can see your pulse thumping in your throat. You wish he would kiss you there, but he holds back.
“Still on the mend?” he asks, bringing his hand down to your ribcage and barely brushing against the bruise. 
“Nothin’ I can’t handle.”
“Tell me if you want me to be gentler,” he says.
You almost scoff. The name “Joel Miller” and the word “gentle” don’t go together. Nothing about that man is gentle. And nothing about what you and he do together behind closed doors has ever been or will ever be gentle. Part of you wonders if Joel would rather go on home than fuck you gently.
Besides, you don’t want it to be gentle. Not one bit.
You slip one of your arms out from where he’s pinning them against the door. You grab his hand and slide it from your rib under your shirt to your breast, squeezing yourself with his palm. “I’m tougher than you think, Miller,” you purr.
It’s your way of giving him permission to do with you what he wants.
“Are you, now?” he drawls. He takes your initiative and runs with it, pinching your nipple between his calloused thumb and forefinger, just a little at first, and then much harder. You gasp, heat flooding your lower stomach. “You think you can handle me tonight, huh, darlin’?”
You reach for his crotch, feeling the erection you know he’s probably had all night, and smile at the strained breath he releases. “Should be asking you the same question, don’t you think?” you say. 
It’s a thoroughly bratty response, not to mention completely loaded, and you and Joel both seem to know it. Joel calls the shots in these encounters, not you. Which is exactly how you both like it.
Joel hitches your leg up and situates his hips in between your legs. You can feel his dick pressed against your inner thigh now. He tangles his hands in your hair and kisses you fiercely again. The only time Joel ever kisses you is before he fucks you. Never after. You’re sure that somewhere, buried deep down inside you, you secretly wish Joel would kiss you after sex, too. But that simply isn’t what this arrangement is about. 
You hang onto the moment as long as possible, lacing your fingers behind his neck and pulling him even closer. His once neatly slicked back hair now mussed from your fingers, and his skin smells like firewood and soap.
Outside, the female military voice recording announcing the strict enforcement of curfew echoes through the QZ, but you and Joel barely notice. You’re lost in him, the feel of his body, the touch of his rough hands, and allow yourself to fall into the mindless, primal motions of sex.
You and Joel have done this many times over the past few months. Sometimes, when all was quiet and going relatively well in the QZ, you didn’t feel the need to visit him quite as often. But your need to see each other only increasing in frequency when things seemed to get worse… and things surely have gotten a lot fucking worse lately. FEDRA cracking down on everyday civilian freedoms. Rising animosity between the factions of smugglers within the QZ, causing many of Tess’s deals for ammo and pills going south more often than not. Firefly attacks within the city walls with no regard for innocent lives. Oh, and not to mention the ever-present problem of the growing number of infected just outside the city… 
All of which to say, you and Joel have been seeing a lot of each other as of late. 
Clothes fall to the floor. Joel’s new shirt that must have come with his set of provisions today, your favorite holey sweater you can’t bear to toss, his pants, your pants, shoes and socks. The next thing you know, you’re flat on your bed beneath him. 
In your past life, would you have been with someone like Joel if you knew of all the bad things he’s done? Would it have overpowered the intense attraction you felt toward him, causing you to be repulsed by him? Probably then.
But not now. You don’t care what he’s done in the name of survival. You both have committed your fair share of inhumanities. But this is just how your lives turned out. Neither you nor Joel had chosen the life of smugglers, but the perseverance to survive takes over one way or another. 
But none of that matters right now. All that matters is the need to eliminate any space and barrier between your hot, needy body and his. 
He’s a menacing sight with his intimidatingly large muscles, the result of nearly five decades worth of manual labor, and the numerous scars peppered over his skin from countless tussles. He looms above you like a thundercloud, like a predatory cat prowling for its meal. You think to yourself how lucky you are to be on his side as an ally in your nefarious affairs—and not just an ally, but a business partner of all things. Because someone like Joel Miller would be a scary as fuck to have as an enemy.
Joel hooks his thumbs under the hems of your underwear and wastes no time to yank them down and off your legs. He pries your legs apart as far as you’ll let him, nearly drooling at the sight of you completely naked for him. You almost feel self-conscious, but you know if you try to shy away or close your legs now, it would do absolutely no good. Joel’s a very single-minded man. When he puts his mind to something, there’s absolutely no stopping him.
It always takes you aback when Joel doesn’t immediately penetrate you, especially with that glint in his eyes like the one he has now. But he never rushes that part, not even when you really wish he would. Instead, as per usual, he dips down and buries his face in your pussy.
“Joel,” you whine out his name, your body lurching—away from him? Closer toward him? You can’t be sure. All you know is that his mouth on your pussy like this feels so intense that it would be impossible not to squirm. You wonder if he does this for himself or for you. “You really don’t have to,” you manage to get out.
The look of sheer wrath he gives you…it’s as if you’d just told him you’d given away all the contraband he’d smuggled to FEDRA. “You think I only do this for you?” he rasps.
“I don’t know," you squeak out with a nervous laugh. "I mean, I know you do it every time, I just wanted to make sure you didn’t feel obligated—”
“Obligated?” Joel barks a laugh. “Don’t be so naive. You think I would eat your pussy if I didn’t want to?” 
Wetness pooled at your core. “Fuck, Joel.”
“I wanna make you squirm first,” he growls. “Wanna make you so needy and wet for me that you don’t think about anything else.” His breath fanned out over your pussy, and you shivered, your thighs squeezing together. He pries them apart again. “You say some bullshit like that again, I’ll tie your ankles to the goddamn bedposts so you can’t even think about closing your legs. You hear me?”
Your eyes widen and your stomach flutters. Does he not know how much the idea of that turns you on? “Yes,” you croak.
“Yes, what?”
“Yes sir,” you correct yourself.
“Good girl.”
He doesn’t need to tie your ankles to the bedposts when he’s got the leverage of his body weight to press your legs apart. His mouth is on you again in an instant and you gasp embarrassingly loudly, falling flat against the mattress.
He eats you out with the fervor and desperation of a parched man finding water, pressing his entire face into you as though he couldn’t possibly get close enough. Joel’s lips trap your clit in a tight suction, his tongue swirling in practiced circles in a way that makes your hairline break out in a sweat. You moan too loudly again, reaching for the nearest pillow to stifle the sound for the sake of your poor neighbors. 
Just when he’s gotten into a groove, Joel releases the suction of his mouth with a pop and buries his whole face even lower, his tongue drawing a lavish line up your entrance before moving inside you, his nose pressed against your clit. He’s absolutely ravenous, and you have no semblance of control left in your body. Your legs jolt, and he presses them even further apart in response. The sparks at the pit of your stomach bloom and bloom.
“Fuck, baby, you taste so good,” he moans into you. You moan in response, tangling your hands in his silvering hair. Baby, that one is new. Baby’s almost too sweet coming from a man like Joel’s lips. A little red flag goes up in your mind but you quickly forget all about it as he continues to lap at you.
Joel breaks away only to wet his finger with his saliva and you watch in awe as he pushes it into you. You see stars as he curls his adept middle finger up toward your belly button. You dig your nails into his arms and keen his name again.
The waves of pleasure grow and grow, like a tsunami on the horizon approaching fast and sure, and your breathing grows erratic. Joel is relentless, tireless, his lips finding your clit again, and it’s as if he knows he’s found the sweet spot, knows the exact speed and intensity to stay at to push you over the edge. His eyes close as if in total bliss, seemingly motionless, and only you as the recipient of this unholy worship could ever know just how expertly fast his tongue is moving against your clit. The combination of that with his digit curling up into you over and over breaks you of any resolve you might have had left.
You should warn him you're going to come. You have before. But you know how well he knows you now. He knows you're right on the edge. So he presses his palm to the soft part of your stomach, just below your belly button, and that does it. He knows me so goddamn well.
You come completely undone, the waves of your orgasm furiously overtaking your whole body. You arch your back and clench your walls around Joel’s finger, unable to keep from writhing in pleasure, unable to hold back the choked moans from your throat.
“That’s right, ride it out, darlin’,” Joel praises you. “Love feeling you squeeze my finger so tight. Good girl.” He sits up and watches your body come down from the high, gently coaxing about what’s left of your convulsions with his finger. But even once they subside, he doesn’t pull it out, instead continuing to curling it into you again over and over. You weren’t expecting a break—Joel never needs one, never gives one unless you ask—but you wonder how on earth you’re going to survive this. With a desperate, pleading sound, you peer up at him in disbelief.
“It’s too much,” you whimper. 
“Do you want me to stop?”
You shake your head furiously. Joel almost smiles at that, almost as though he knew your response already. He repositions himself so he’s propped up on his elbow beside your body, his other hand still at your slippery entrance. His finger slides in and out with each movement, the pad of his finger gliding against precisely the right place inside you. It’s a sensation only another person could satisfy in you, and you find yourself silently thanking your lucky stars that Joel knows how to do it so well. He knows your body so well after just a few months, knows exactly what you need is a break from the clitoral stimulation, yet added stimulation elsewhere. 
Pressure builds in your pelvis, a different kind of pressure than before. Your jaw falls open when his tempo picks up. Joel presses his forehead to yours, sharing your breaths, before he moves to your ear and starts whispering.
“Takin’ my finger so well,” he breathes, and goosebumps erupt across your whole body. “Wanna see if you can handle another one?”
You nod breathlessly and he slides his ring finger in with the middle finger. A jolt of energy overtakes your body. Oh, fuck, oh, fuck. The last time he fingered you like this, you had completely soaked the mattress. You had luckily remembered to lay a couple of towels down under the sheets this time, just in case, but still. You’d been humiliated. You hadn’t said anything about it last time, but you knew what had happened, and you knew that he knew.
And now he’s going to make you squirt again. Which means that he likes it. 
Joel sets into a relentless pace and the dreaded pressure grows and grows. “That’s my good little slut,” he growls. “Want you to let go for me, make my fingers wet.”
You can’t help it. The pressure in your core explodes. A slick wetness seeps all over Joel’s fingers and into the sheets around your hips. Joel moans into your neck. You feel yourself turning so hot you break a sweat.
“Oh god,” you moan, suddenly lightheaded, and you cover your face. You feel him wrench your hands away and he stares at you in astonishment.
“Are you…embarrassed?” he gapes.
“Yes,” you respond, like it’s the most obvious thing in the world.
His face shifts slightly from disbelief into an almost sinister expression. “Look at you. All humiliated at the mess I made you make for me.”
The fact that he takes pleasure in your humiliation turns you on more than you’re willing to admit. “Fuck you, Joel,” you bark back, but there’s no energy left in your voice for malice.
Joel grips your chin harshly, forcing you to look at him. “You don’t call the shots here. If I want you to make a fuckin’ mess for me, then you will.”
If he hadn’t been manhandling you before, he’s manhandling you now, pulling your limp body into the exact position he wants: on your stomach, your thighs pressed together, your ass pointed up at him perfectly.
You realize then that he’s been touching himself for quite some time through his boxers, only now he’s sliding them off his body, revealing his dick, weeping and swollen and angry red. If you had any ounce of energy left in your body, you’d flip yourself over so you were on top and wrap your mouth around it. But he’s faster than you can replenish your energy, and in one feverish motion, he’s mounting you from behind, his dick pressed against the base of your ass.
“Tell me how bad you want me to fuck you raw into these sheets.”
You know Joel, know what he’s doing. He’s playing up the moment, building the anticipation, but he’s also gauging your consent. He’s asking your permission.
“Please,” you mewl. “Please fuck me, sir. I want you so bad.”
“Good,” he responds. “Good girl.” And then he’s plowing his dick into you.
Holy fuck. The momentum of his first thrust pushes you several inches up the bed and you cry out, inviting the mix of pain and pleasure with eagerness. He’s so much fucking bigger than his fingers, even though his fingers are nothing short of girthy themselves.
He pulls out unbearably slow, almost all the way out, until just the ridge of his head remains inside you, before he grips your hips with a fervor and thrusts back into you with a grunt. And again, and again. A rush of emotions floods through you at the feeling…among them, a sense of security, a total trust in him, the reassurance at the knowledge that Joel would stop if you told him you wanted to. 
God, you don’t want him to stop.
“Mine,” he growls, gathering your arms behind your back, and your muscles burn. “You hear me? Your pussy’s fucking mine, sweetheart.”
You have no coherent response, only his name.
Joel uses your bended arms locked behind you as leverage, gripping them with desperation as he rams into you over and over again, taking what’s his. His dick feels unreal inside you, slipping in and out like it’s made for you. The position of your arms plays tricks on your mind, makes you feel trapped in the best way possible, like there’s no escape from this. Which, of course, there is an escape—the simple phrase stop, something you and Joel had agreed upon weeks prior—and yet, the false sense of helplessness is exactly what you’re going for. 
And what is it for Joel that gets him going about this, you wonder briefly? Is it the false sense of control, something he’s felt devoid of in real life for years now? Is it the fact that for just one night, everything that happens will have been something that Joel had direct influence over? Did he need that catharsis of complete control as much as you needed the catharsis of being out of control? You wonder if maybe you and Joel were made to find each other in these awful, bleak times, if maybe though you fight day in and day out about business, if you were made for each other in this way.
A strange sensation along the spine of your back. It’s Joel’s lips, soft and wet along with the scratch of his beard. Juxtaposed with the unforgiving force of his hips crashing into your ass, you melt into him. He's never done that while he fucks you before. Joel releases your arms and kisses your back again, seeming to soak in the feel of your skin on his lips. He moves up to your neck, still mounted on top of you, still sliding in and out of you with a vigor, but his mouth comes to rest by your ear.
“You feel so good, baby,” he whispers. “You’re so beautiful. The most beautiful girl I've ever seen.”
Oh, god. That was tender. You didn’t hate it, but talk about uncharacteristic for Joel Miller. Red flag goes up again. You squash it down, not wanting to kill the moment. You reach behind and comb your fingers through his hair. “Joel, oh my god, Joel.”
Maybe it’s as if he realized he’d breached some unspoken protocol with that lapse in his tough-guy persona, but Joel seems to snap to reality. With a new intensity, he pulls out of you to draw your hips up, propping you up on your knees and elbows. A much less tender, much more primal position. He kneels behind you and brings your hips back to meet his dick again, bottoming out in one motion.
You cry out and arch your back. This new angle is intense. Tender Joel Miller is gone, at least for now. He seals that notion with a hard slap of his palm on your ass.
He fucks you hard and fast and it’s precisely what you want. Waves of desire start to ebb and flow in your pelvis once again. You wince in surprise as you feel Joel bring his head down to bite your shoulder lightly. Nope, nothing tender about this.
“Oh my god, Joel, I’m— you’re gonna make me—”
“Make you what?” Joel demands. “Make you come again, pretty girl?”
You can’t make another sound; you feel so fucked out you could only nod as he brought you closer and closer. But Joel wanted more.
“You heard me, tell me how good I make you feel,” he growled and bit down on your shoulder harder this time. “Tell me you’re gonna come all over my dick.”
Telling Joel anything would be a little hard to do considering he’s fucking you so hard you could hardly breathe let alone speak, but Joel was now hell bent on hearing you. He slaps your ass again, even harder, and your knees nearly buckle. But you manage to locate your voice.
“You feel so good,” you sob out, falling forward onto your elbows while Joel keeps a tight grip on your hips. “I'm gonna come again.”
“You want that?” Joel says in almost a sneer from behind you. “You wanna come for me again, my dirty little slut?”
“Yes, sir,” you say, your voice hitching each time he rams into you, “please, please.”
“Love it when you beg like that for me. So desperate, it’s pitiful. Fuck,” he groans, seeming to somehow swell inside of you even more. Droplets of wetness roll down your thighs, your pleasure mixed with his precum. “You better not come until I say so.”
His request may or may not be plausible, given how fast approaching your orgasm was coming over you. You had no choice but to take him how he wanted you to and try to hold off your orgasm as long as you could. Joel keeps a firm grip on your sides as he snaps his hips, and the explicit slapping sounds of skin on skin fill your bedroom.
“Oh-oh-my-g-god,” you gasp out, moaning with each perfectly angled thrust, nearly in tears from how deep he is. You’re teetering right on the edge, dangerously close to the edge, but you realize then, so is he, if his heavy breathing and moaning is any indication.
“Come on, Joel, baby, cum deep in my pussy, make me yours…” The pet name had just slipped out of your mouth again. Reservations be fucked. If you wanted to be tender and intimate right now, so fucking be it.
Sure enough, Joel gasps and grunts with more bravado than you’d ever heard from him before, as if hearing you call him baby had made him come on command. You feel a flood of warmth gush inside you, filling you up as he stills and drops his head to your shoulder. The final bucking of his hips and the visceral, shuddering whimper that comes from his throat set you off as well. You can’t hold back the cry that comes from somewhere deep in your body. “I’m coming, Joel, I can’t help it—”
“It’s okay, sweetheart, come for me now. I got you. It’s okay.”
You come hard and keep coming for longer than you thought was possible. Explosions of pleasure wrack your body and were it not for Joel holding you up, you’d have collapsed into the mattress. You’re clenching so hard around Joel’s dick that you wonder if it might hurt him, but he doesn’t protest, just moans right along with you.
You’re still trembling from the aftershocks as Joel pulls you up so your back is pressed against his chest and you both take a moment to catch your breath. Joel cups your breasts and kneads them in his hands as he comes down from his high, and in your daze you were dimly aware that he’s peppering several soft kisses along your shoulder blades, humming against your skin.
Again with the intimacy. What is going on?
“Joel?”
“Mmm?”
“Are you...dying or something?”
“What?”
“Or, like, secretly infected or some shit you don’t wanna tell me?”
He huffs, peeling himself off of you. You ignore the feeling of his cum dribbling out of you and turn to look at him. He’s scowling now, to no one’s surprise. 
“What the hell are you talking about?” he barks. Aggravated, yet again. Oh, well, it's not like you were going to get any aftercare from him anyway—not part of the arrangement.
But nor was all that other shit he'd done.
“You’re acting…weird,” you accuse, your heart still pounding from before. 
“I’m not acting weird,” he snaps back, defensive.
“You’re not acting like yourself, is all I mean,” you respond, crossing your arms and legs.
He watches you, that same tendon in his temple tensing up. “I have no idea what the devil you’re talking about,” he mutters, looking away.
“You have no idea what—” you repeat, shaking your head before explaining, “Joel, that was different.”
“What was different?” he asks, his voice gruff. 
“That! The whole…” you say uselessly, gesturing between you and him.
He just stares at you. If he’s catching your drift, he must just be playing dumb now. “I’m gonna go,” he grumbles, standing to slip back on his boxers. “Come find me again when you start makin’ sense and stop drabblin’ on about nonsense.”
“Wait, stop, stop. Stop it, Joel,” you say, gripping his arm. “Jesus, will you let me talk? Why are you trying to run away?”
He glares down at you, his jaw rigid. A few tense seconds pass. “Go ahead,” he says at last, in response to the first question. As for the second question, you figure he’s trying to work that one out himself.
Now that you have his attention, you’re stunned. What exactly was the issue you were trying to bring up? He was being too sweet to you? 
As if you can feel your own defenses coming up around you, you look around for your sweater and underwear, not wanting to be the only one unclothed here. Joel watches you wordlessly as you pull on your clothes, and your resolve grows stronger. 
“That felt different,” you repeat, looking into his eyes for some sign that he agrees with you. “Didn’t it?”
Joel says nothing. In the silent space, your words come spilling out.
“Like… I don’t know, I just feel like something changed tonight. You felt different this time.”
Joel frowns in confusion and looks down at his crotch.
“No, not like that.” You sigh and run a hand through your hair. “It’s the things you…did. And said. It just felt different to me.”
“Like what?” Joel said, still playing dumb. You sigh again in exasperation. Is he really going to make you bring up specific examples?
“I mean, like…the kisses. And…and why’d you call me beautiful?” you insist.
He glowers. “What, so I can’t call you beautiful?”
“No, I—I mean, you can, I just… You’ve never said anything like that to me before,” you respond. He truly hasn't. He's called you sexy, called your pussy pretty, things like that. But he's never leaned down to whisper in your ear that he thinks you're the most beautiful girl in the world while railing the fuck out of you.
"Well, I did now. But I wouldn’t have said anything if I knew you were gonna get all weird about it.”
Jesus, he could be so fucking immature for a man in his late 40s. “It just took me off guard, that’s all.”
“Well, if that’s all, I don’t understand what’s the big problem.”
Why isn’t he understanding? You can’t help it, you explode. “That isn’t what we agreed on, Joel,” you say, your voice more insistent.
“What isn’t?”
“The...kissing, and the calling each other pet names, and the exchanging niceties,” you say emphatically. “Shit like that. That’s not what this arrangement is supposed to be about.” You started this with Joel to avoid your feelings…
Not to catch them for each other.
Joel leans down closer to you, cynicism in his voice as he says, “And what is it that this arrangement’s supposed to be about, then?”
“Sex!” you shout, raising your arms in exasperation. “Just sex!”
Right?
Joel says nothing. He stands and silently puts on the rest of his clothes before giving you the hardest stare you’ve ever seen from him since you met him half a year ago.
“Maybe for you.”
Your mouth goes dry. But before you can think of a response, Joel slips his shoes on and mutters. “I’m gonna go. Don’t come after me tonight.” Without another word, he leaves your dingy apartment, leaving you alone with your jaw on the floor. And in that moment, you realize, you had Joel Miller all wrong.
———
a/n: …i’m kind of embarrassed to put this on the internet but hey at least no one i know follows me so!!! hopefully at least! hahahahah 😭
Thank you so much for reading! I’m dying to hear your thoughts about it! Please note that I write fanfiction for free; my only request for repayment is a genuine expression of your thoughts, opinions, likes/dislikes, and predictions about the story. Whether it’s simply a “Wow, I loved it!”, a keyboard smash, a series of convoluted thoughts in the tags, or even a full-out review, please know that any and all feedback is welcome! 
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Much love ❤︎ from Juniper
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