#I meant hot pink * but yeah I guess he is also a hot punk in a sense lmao

[thyandrawrites]

Anyway do we think shidou was born with that hairstyle or does he go to the salon regularly

[oops-aquarius]

tainted kisses

summary: steve needs some relaxation, which you provide to him

warnings: smut (!!!!), praise kink, slight degradation kink, a little bit of angst cuz a hoe is sad, oral fixation (duh), slight dom/sub dynamics (?), mentions of sadness/depression, tiny mommy kink (like barely there)

pairing: steve rogers x reader

word count: 2.2k

note(s): not edited well at all, also i used a prompt generator to get the promt i used (which is below !!)

prompt: “baths or water (tubs or jacuzzis; hot springs; water houses or steam rooms; the ocean; swimming pools.”

kink: “Oral fixation or fetishization (lips, tongue, or whole mouth; french-kissing; licking; oral displays using food or beer bottles; smoking cigarettes, cigars, or pipes; biting or chewing one's lip(s))”

--

***this is post-endgame except nobody died, cause im a hoe for all of the avengers***

Steve never realized how much he liked things in his mouth. Not always in a sexual way, at least not until after fighting Thanos.

After fighting for so long, bottling up his emotions was not at all how Steve needed to cope. He tried the yoga and meditation route Wanda had so kindly suggested. Yeah, after one session of hot yoga, Steve decided that it wasn't going to happen. Tony, obviously, suggested sex. Said something about it being a “healing experience for the soul”. That’s bullshit were Steve’s first thoughts when that came out of his mouth. Bucky told him to get some goats and raved about how therapeutic it was to raise them. But Steve could barely take care of himself, how would he even take care of a goat? Steve felt a hot sense of hopelessness burn against the back of his eyes as he sat on the floor of his bedroom, back pressed against the adjoined bathroom door.

“Steve?” A soft knock came from the front door. He took his thumb away from his mouth, he had resorted to subconsciously nibbling on the tip of it. Pulling himself off the door and towards the voice, he rubbed his tear-stricken cheeks in attempts to clean himself up a bit before seeing you.

“One sec, Y/N/N.”

When he opened the door, your face softened a bit before the smile that Steve, secretly, loved so much dropped off your face completely. “Stevie, what happened?”

Stevie, a nickname he hated for his entire life. A name that reminded him of the days before the super solider serum where he was a little guy getting beaten up on the streets of Brooklyn. Stevie, a nickname he loved hearing from your caring voice. Nobody else’s. 

“Just tired, Y/N” he sighed, “so,so tired.”

“Stevie,” your voice caught at the back of your throat. Seeing him in so much pain made your life turn upside down. He doesn't deserve to be in pain. “ S’there anything I can do to make you feel better?”

“Just stay with me? Please?”

You took him back into his bed and sat with him, just talking about life until his breathing turned back to normal and he seemed partially-okay. 

“Do you want to take a bath?” you asked, still stroking the blonde strands of his hair.

“Are you saying I smell?” He took his face out of the crook of your shoulder, feigning a look of hurt.

“No, punk, I meant to relax. You seemed pretty shaken up and I just wanted to help. I mean, that’s what I do when I feel down, relax in a bat-”

He cuts you off, “I appreciate it. Really, Y/N, I don’t know many people that are as loving and caring as you, sweetheart.” The nickname made a pang in your heart. You had like the super solider since you had met him, but never felt like he reciprocated the feelings. Even though you both cuddled often, and had movie nights, and he always let you beat him while sparring, and that one time you came down with a stomach bug and he fed you soup and-holy shit. Did Steve like you? “Sweetheart?”

“Huh?”

“I said, ‘A bath does sound nice’. What’s got you so suddenly zoned out?” He says, donning a smirk.

“It’s nothing. Let’s get you into that bath, mister,” you had a faux grumpy look on your face as you got up and walked to the bathroom, starting to fill the white, ceramic bathtub with warm water. “Okay, big boy. You need help getting up or are you okay?”

Rolling his eyes at your inauthentic tone, Steve pushes his tensed frame off the body and managed to stumble into the bathroom, while you following him closely to make sure he doesn't fall over from exhaustion.

“I get it, I’m old, but damn Y/N. I can walk perfectly fine,” He chuckles as he pushes himself up to sit on the counter top.

You start to fill up the bathtub with warm water, adding bubbles and lighting a few scented candles. He looked so pretty, hair sticking out in every direction, lips pink and puffy from biting them, his ocean blue eyes still misty as he looks down at his cuticles, picking them slightly. 

“Okay, I’m gonna leave so you can take this bath,” you say, shutting off the faucet, “Got it?”

“Y/N?”

“Yes, Stevie.”

“Stay, please.” His eyes were watering more than earlier. He had those puppy dog eyes, lip quivering as his voice cracked and wavered even with just a few words. He looked so vulnerable, how could you say no to him?

“Of course, Steve. I mean, the bubbles with kind of cover everything. I’ll just sit next to the tub with you, alright?” You awkwardly giggled and scratched the back of your neck. He nodded, hopping off of the counter and starting to undress himself with a wobble. “Stevie, you’re shaking like a leaf, let me help you.”

His eyes never met yours as you helped him pull his t-shirt over his head and looped your delicate fingers through the waistband of his sweatpants, dragging them down his muscular thighs. “You’re not gonna finish your job, doll?”

His boxers. The only clothes he had left on were his grey boxers. You wanted to give him privacy and not look, especially in such a broken and vulnerable state. But god, you could see the outline of his partially-hard cock through the soft cotton. You thought about what it would be like to have your mouth around his hard length, chocking on it as he rammed himself into the back of your throat.

“Ummm, I just--I thought--I mean I can---Only if you want--” The dirty thoughts clouded your brain. It made speaking a speaking a sentence almost impossible as your mouth watered just thinking about his cock.

“It was a joke, sweetheart,” he laughed heartily, “You’re too adorable.”

Pulling his boxers down his legs, he waddled tiredly over to the tub before stepping in. He groaned in pleasure at the feeling of the warm water encapsulating his exhausted body. You imagined that’s how he’d groan if you sucked his cock so hard he was seeing stars.

You were still facing the door, like you were as Steve got completely undressed. You knew if you turned around and look at him, naked and at ease, you’d jump his bones in a heartbeat. “Come sit with me, Y/N”

And you did. You turned around cautiously, like you expected, the bubbles covered his body enough for you to be able to handle yourself as you sat down next to the tub. You grabbed his hand away from his lips, running your soft fingers over his rough calloused ones. “I always see you biting your nails or cuticle or lips or your pens. Why?”

He sighed, “I’m not sure, I guess it just distracts me?” He said it more like it was a question rather than a statement. “I guess I don’t truly know why I do it, I guess I just enjoy having things in my mouth.”

You could read Steve like a book, his pupils blown with lust, his lip stuck between his teeth, a blush heating up his cheeks. You took a leap of faith.

“Yeah, like what?”

“You.”

His lips were on yours in a flurry, it took a second for you to react, but as soon as you did it felt amazing. Neither of you seemed to care about the water splashing over you as his hands trailed up your body, tugging at the hem of your shirt.

He pulls away panting, “F-Fuck, Y/N, I need you. Please. Oh my god I need you so bad,” His eyes looked as if they were welling up with tears and he looked so pretty still in the relaxing bubble bath, whimpering and whining for you. 

“God, I need you too, baby,” you stop to look in his eyes sincerely, “Are you sure you want this? I don’t want to do anything that you don’t want to do or that you will regret.” Your hand caresses his cheek.

“Just get in here with me and I’ll show you how much I want you,” he whispered, “Need you, really.”

You sighed before your hands moved shakily to take off your t shirt. As much as you wanted this, you were still scared of how the ripped super solider would feel about you and your body, As soon as your shirt was off, Steve was whimpering, dipping his hand into the soapy water to massage his aching cock. This only spurred you to take off your clothes and join him faster. 

“Did I say you could touch yourself, puppy?” Your stern voice caught him off-guard, making him pause his actions with a look of fear on his face. You step into the bathtub, straddling him. Your nails raked up his milky white thighs, trailing up his body admiring the beauty of it. “Y’Know I was planning on being nice to you because you’ve been so good to me, but you might need to be punished, baby? Do you need to punshied like a brat?”

He mewled, bowing his head in shame. You could feel him growing harder and harder by the second and you were starting to go crazy with the empty feeling inside of you that on he could fill. “No, ma’am. I’ll be good, I swear!”

“Mmmm, that’s my good boy.” Your hands slid up his chest and rested on his cheeks, hearing him preen at your praise, as you repositioned yourself over his cock. “Are you sure you want this?”

“If you dont ride me into next week right fucking now I’m going to scream, Y/N,” He breathed out with a chuckle, Grabbing your thighs, he helps you sink down on his cock. Both of you were moaning and whimpering messes by the time you were sitting at this base of him, trying to get adjusted to his large size. 

Hot tears burned at the back of his eyes as soon as you lifted yourself up off of him, only leaving the tip of him inside of you, and slamming back down on his dick. 

“Baby-please,” he whimpered, “n-need, shit, need your fingers, bad.” 

You were confused, slowing down a bit to make sure he was okay. But his puppy dog eyes showed that he was okay. Slowly taking your wrist from his cheek, he puts your fingers in his warm mouth. Moaning around them and swirling his tongue around them. He did it the same way you always dreamed about sucking his dick, chocking and gagging on his length.

“Yeah, you’re such a needy little slut for me, for this pussy. Look at you, so ruined and fucked out just because I’m fucking you.” He moaned sensually at your words making your core tighten impossibly. 

You had gotten a good idea as you were riding him. Slowly, you start to thrust your hand in and out of his mouth, watching the saliva dribble out of the corners of his mouth as he choked on you. The band in your tummy starts tightening as you feel yourself getting close. 

“Shit, fuck, baby, I’m gonna come. Oh my god, you’re make me come with your beautiful cock, puppy. So good for me, aren’t you?” Your free hand dips into the water, cupping his balls and rolling them around your soft palm.

He nods, choking on your nimble finger yet again his you massage his sensitive balls. “Gonna come,” he slurred and spit around you.\, “almost there.”

“I didn’t” you moaned as you feel his balls tighten, fall back down on his cock at a faster pace, “give you permission to do that. I thought you were going to be good for me?”

“I am” he spluttered loudly, “i am good, I swear. Just please let me come. I need it, oh shit, mommy.”

The name went straight to your core, making you grow weak as you feebly give him permission to come as you come undone with one more bounce on his large member. His hands come up to grope your breasts as he come with hot spurts inside of your tight cunt. 

“Oh my god,” you stifle a giggle as you stand up on shaky legs. You wordlessly helped him out of the tub and wrapped him in a white towel, walking him to bed while you dried yourself off. Collapsing on the bed with a grunt, the solider hollds out his hand to you, signalling you to lay down with him. You could easily tell he was still coming down from his sex high, starting to regain his self back.

“I dont know what possessed me to,” he pauses, trying to figure out a way to word the rest of his sentence, “to suck, I guess, on your hand. I’m sorry, Y/N, that was really weird of me.”

“What do’ya mean, baby? Having an oral fixation isn’t something to be ashamed of.” The words make him smile with droopy eyes, tucking his head into your neck and starting to fall asleep, happy and comfortable, cuddling you.

“And to be honest, puppy. I think it’s really hot.”

[keysmashingfantasies]

An Old Fashioned Meet Cute

A/N: hi! this is my first fic here and i hope you like it. comments and constructive criticism is very much appreciated just please be nice and i tried not to describe nor reader nor the Hilda character too much apart from the fact that they are plus size so it can cater to more people (altough the Hilda character is a white woman originally, I left that out because I wanted everyone to be able to read it) :D. and a huge thank you to @divine-mistake for encouraging me to make this blog and post my fics. ily Tay <3, this one's for you.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x fem!plus size Reader

Word count: 2.1k

Summary: Bucky didn’t remember much of his life before the war. Not as much as he would like, anyway. But he was content to at least have remembered something. The memories of his teenage shenanigans with Steve always made him laugh. But there was a memory that he didn’t even know it was on his mind until that day when he accompanied Steve to the thrift shop. And until an Avengers party, where he met you.

-

“Steve, come on… Shouldn’t you be showing me the wonders of the modern world?”, he mocked. He knew Steve was doing his best, he did. But he knew that this wasn’t just a friends’ afternoon. And Bucky didn’t need a babysitter.

“I will! I just thought it would be nice to see something less overwhelming first and Sam told me a thrift store would be a nice place to start. Most of this stuff is new to us anyway”, Steve said, picking up a CD of a shelf.

“Yeah, ok”, he mumbled. The things he did for Steve. He mindlessly wandered through the little cluttered store, browsing the shelves full of knick knacks. He saw vinyls, old books, a great variety of toys, some paintings and an old fashioned vanity, with an old mirror, a few vintage perfume bottles, and… Oh.

“Steve?”, he said, picking up the old calendar that was propped up against the stained mirror. Carefully, he lifted the calendar up, looking at his friend. He had seen it before, he knew he did. He flipped through it as he waited for Steve to make his way across the store, careful to not bump in any of the tables containing delicate porcelain tea pots. His eyes scanned through the cover, a delicately painted picture of a curvy woman and with the saying “HILDA, 1940’s calendar” in bold red letters above it.

“Oh wow”, Steve let out a belly laugh. “You remember when we stole some of these? Man, we even took these to war”, he said. He started to remember. Him and Steve running, each one with a calendar in hand, flipping through the pages, Steve whining that he would never find a girl like that. He didn’t even think twice before taking it to the counter, with Steve giggling like a school girl behind him.

“For the memories, punk”, he said in a stern voice and a frown, but with pink dusted cheeks.

“Of course”, Steve said in a mocking voice.

-

“So, Tony’s throwing a party next weekend”, Steve said as he entered the training room.

“I prefer the thrift store”, Bucky mumbled, without tearing his eyes from the punching bag.

“Come on, Buck. I think it will be good for you to go”, Steve said. “It will be something small, Tony will introduce the new team assistant, so no eyes will be on you”, that got Bucky’s attention.

“Small?”, he said, pushing his hair from his face.

“Very”, Steve assured, but he had that look that Bucky knew very well from his young years; the look he would get when he was about to pick a fight. He was up to no good. But he didn’t want another trip to a dusty thrift store.

“Yeah, sure”, he mumbled.

-

You were shaking in your boots. Yeah, you knew that you would work for them, which meant that you inevitably would have to attend this kind of things. But this wasn’t like your former office jobs, no. You work for the Avengers now.

“You can do this. You have to. Do it for the paycheck”, you said, trying to reassure yourself as you shakily applied mascara. As you browsed through your wardrobe, you let out a sigh. You remembered shyly asking for advice on what to wear from Natasha, but you took it with a grain of salt. She could wear a potato sack and still look gorgeous, and you were… Well, a potato. You knew this was another test. If you couldn’t handle all eyes on you and the eventual bickering that was about to happen, you were not fit for the job. But damn, you at least expected a few weeks of taking care of documents and serving coffee before a party. In a room. With the, quoting the tabloid you read that very morning “super team that saves the world and looks hot doing it!”. You were a pretty confident person. But this… Anyone would be nervous.

“You can do this”, you told yourself one more time before heading out.

-

When you got to the party, not everyone was there. You politely greeted everyone with a nod, and gave your name to the ones you didn’t have the pleasure to meet yet.

“You, pick your poison”, Tony Stark pointed at you while walking to the bar.

“No, thank you, Mr. Stark, I won’t be drinking tonight”, you managed to say, silently thanking all the gods above (even the one that was sitting not too far from you) that you managed to hold back the quiver in your voice.

“She doesn’t want to be vulnerable around us. Smart, I like her”, said Natasha. Sometimes you wonder if she was a telepath like Wanda.

“Is there anything wrong, Y/N? I sense that you are uneasy”, asked Vision, with those glassy unblinking eyes. You wondered if he was in your mind that very moment.

“Gee, I wonder why”, said Rhodes, before taking a sip of his drink.

“I’m okay, just… A bit nervous, that’s all”, you said.

“Well, then you definitely need a drink”, said Tony, handing you a glass of champagne that no doubt cost the same as your previous paycheck.

Soon enough, the awkwardness made way to pleasant conversation. You laughed as you listened to their banter. It wasn’t like any business party you ever attended. No, it was more like a family gathering than anything.

The sounds of the elevator doors opening caught you attention as three men wide as refrigerators walked in, followed closely by a pretty young woman. Of course you knew them. You read all about them. Especially The Winter Soldier, the little devil on your shoulder taunting you by remembering you of every single time you talked to your friend about your crush on him.

“Sorry we’re late guys, Steve went to pick me up before the party and we had dinner”, said the blonde, linking her arm with Steve Rogers himself.

“Nah, Sharon, don’t cover his ass. We were late because the three of us had to wrestle Barnes into changing out of that old ass Henley”, said Sam.

Instantly, Tony and Natasha cheered and raised their glasses, making you laugh.

“Yeah, yeah, very funny”, said a gruff voice coming from the bar, making you turn your head, seeing Bucky Barnes open a beer bottle with his vibranium hand. 'How did he sneak past everyone?', your thoughts were interrupted as you took him in. You wanted to personally thank Sam, Steve and Sharon for making him wear that tight fitting black shirt.

“Well, Y/N, here’s Capsicle, Mrs. Capsicle, New Captain, and Snowflake. Guys, this is Y/N, the new assistant. Oh, and there’s Spider Boy but he’s on curfew, Strange had to hop out of the dimension and Scott but he’s… He’s somewhere out there being small, I don’t know. Watch were you step, just to be safe”, said Tony

“Hi”, you gave a shy wave, being greeted right back.

-

If it wasn’t for the serum, Bucky is absolutely sure he would have a heart attack on the spot. You were wearing red heels, a form fitting black pencil skirt and a white button up blouse and he could see your curves, your strong arms, your thighs. You looked absolutely amazing. You look like one of the girls that Bucky would’ve rushed to ask for a dance back in the day. But what really made him stare is the fact that your body type looked eerily similar to the character of the calendar he spent an embarrassing amount of time staring.

As your eyes scanned the room as you were bombarded with questions, Bucky made sure to avoid your gaze, looking everywhere but your face: his shoes, the ceiling, the armrest on the couch, Steve’s shit eating grin. Oh. So THAT’S what it was about. Little shit.

Even avoiding your gaze, he made sure to keep his ears open. A man could be interested, right?

.

By the time the party ended, Thor and Bruce were sleeping, Tony was buzzed walking around singing Iron Maiden, Natasha and Sharon were talking, Steve and Sam were giggling like two school girls, Rhodes went home and Vision and Wanda were talking and looking out the window to the New York skyline.

Which left you – and Bucky – alone.

“Uhhh. I guess I’ll start cleaning, then”, you said. Your face was on fire. The only person that you were sure didn’t like you and you were awkwardly standing, not knowing where to look and what to say. It didn’t help that you were attracted to him but damn it, you were not going to lose this opportunity because of a school girl crush. So you decided to keep yourself occupied by taking some empty glasses and bottles from the table and taking them to the kitchen.

“Oh, come on, Y/N! Let the cleaning crew deal with this in the morning!”, said Natasha.

“No, no, I don’t mind. I like to keep myself busy”, you said with a smile. Technically, it wasn’t a lie. You only hoped she couldn’t see how awkward you were.

“I’ll help”, he said, picking up some glasses and following you.

“You can pick up more of these glasses and I can start washing them”, he said. “I- I noticed you got your nails done, so…”, he said, and you shyly looked away while thanking him and making your way out of the kitchen.

.

In no time, the room was getting emptier. Vision and Wanda went home and Thor took Banner back to New Asgard. And you were almost done with the dishes, having also gotten rid of most of the empty food containers. As you both cleaned, you and Bucky got a bit more comfortable with each other.

“I’m sorry for seeming a bit standoffish earlier”, he said suddenly. “I’m not used to parties and I don’t know how new people will react to me. Especially pretty women”, you smiled at the compliment, but felt your heart ache. You were so caught up in your insecurities that you didn’t even consider his side of things.

“You don’t have to be sorry. I don’t know how you feel but by what I’ve seen and heard, you have a family here. You’re out there fighting to save the world. Trying your best. This is redemption enough, don’t you think?”, you said as you put the glasses to dry, missing the awestruck look that Bucky sent you, a goofy smile making its way into his features. “Okay, you wait here and I’ll get what’s left”.

You were back in no time. “Okay, so just more two champagne flutes and one plate left”, you said but before you could give the dishes to Bucky, you slipped, and if it wasn’t for Bucky’s reflexes, you would’ve fallen hard. You yelped as the sound of breaking glass hit your ears and for a second you two just stared at each other, before Bucky pulled you closer and back to a standing position.

“Thanks”, you said as he helped you straighten up.

“Your ankle, does it hurt?”, he said.

“Uh, no, I don’t think so”, you said.

“Ah, I think it does. And I can’t let a dame go home alone on a hurt ankle”, he said, giving you a dashing smile.

“You know what, now that you’ve said it, it hurts really bad”, you said, catching on. “You know what’s amazing for a bad ankle?”, you asked, and the gentle smile in your lips and the mischievous glint in your eyes made his heart piston inside of his chest.

"What?", he said softly, stepping closer, like you were sharing secrets.

“Ice cream and a walk on the park. Very therapeutical”, you said, making Bucky laugh.

.

Before you knew it, Bucky had already scooped you up into his arms and rushedly announced that you had slipped and fell, whisking you away into the elevator.

“Dude, that took all night”, said Sam. “This is the smooth guy you told me about?”, he said, while Steve and Sharon laughed.

While everyone got ready to go home, Scott came out of the kitchen in his Ant-Man suit eating some leftovers.

“Someone owes me 20 bucks for making her trip”.

[thewritingstar]

ButchxBubbles friendship???

Thanks for the request :)

The thought of Butch and Bubbles having a spa night? Yes please. Im not really good at writing friendship fluff fics so i hope this is ok. I really like the idea of their friendship dynamic and maybe I’ll elaborate more on it. Plus I wrote this at like 1 am so yeah. 

Enjoy. :) Request and asks always open

----

Bubbles finished bringing all her products from the bathroom to her bedroom. She had everything ready for her spa treatment as her sisters were off on some over night history field trip for their class. Of course she wasn’t in that class so she was left by herself and the professor was out of town for a couple of days. 

She had quite the collection of things to do and wished someone was here to do it with her. She could call Robin but she knew she had gone to her cousins house and her other friends lived a few miles away. Boomer had even gone on the trip but was sending her photos every ten minutes. 

“Guess its just us tonight.” She looked to Octi who just stared at her with his button eye. 

A sound came from behind and she turned to see something hitting her window. She got closer and saw that a figure was there. She threw open the window and looked outside. Her eyes widening slightly as she saw who was hovering. 

“Butch?” She said questionably and he gave her a small wave. 

“Sup Blondie.” He smirked. 

Her signature giggle echoed. “What are you doing here?”

“Well since every one is gone on that stupid trip, I thought why not see what you’re up to” He shrugged. 

“Are you sure?” She looked behind her at the set up she had. “I don’t think my plans is something you would be up for.” 

He flew past her and she closed the window. “Don’t care, I am bored.” He took a spot on the floor in front of the blanket that was laid out and coated with products upon products. 

Bubbles walked over and sat on the other side looking at all the products. “I was just going to do a spa night time or what I like to call Bubbles Time.” She sighed. 

He shifted a little. “I can leave if you want, I just thought-”

“No!” She held up her hands and shook her head. “No you don’t have to go. My sisters don’t ever participate so its nice having someone here, even if you don’t wanna be pampered.” 

Butch picked up a bottle while Bubbles fasten her hair into two cute space buns. He popped open the cap and took a sniff. Coconut and pineapple filled his nose and he could tell Bubbles wasn’t as bubbly as usual. He didn’t want to slap the shit on his face but knowing that not even Blossom wanted to do this with her, he thought why not. 

“Im game. Whats first?” He asked.

She looked up at him with a blank stare. “Really?” Her face slightly turned almost like a cute puppy dog. 

“Sure why not. Your skin is probably hella smooth and its not like this shit is gonna hurt.” 

Her smile was blinding as nodded. She let out a high pitched squeal and soon her was pulled into a hug. “Thank you Butch! Thank you! Not even Boomie would do this with me, fucking meanie.” he whispered the last part and he was let go from the bone crushing hug. 

“Nah fuck Boomie.” he slightly cringed at the nickname but now he had blackmail against his baby bro. “This is Bubbs and Butch time.” 

She clapped her hands together and began preparing.

--

“So now this will open your pores and get the rest of all that dirt. Geez your pores are huge.” Bubbles said as she popped open the toner and spread it on the cotton pad.

“Rude.” Butch said but took the soaked cotton from her. He watched her apply it to her skin and copied her motions while looking in the mirror. His hair was pushed away from his face with a light purple hairband that had cat ears on it. “This shit kinda burns.”

“Don’t be a pussy.” 

“Damn Bubbs didn’t know you cussed often.” He held out his hand to accept the moisturizer from her. “Kinda bad ass.” 

She laughed at this. “Oh Blossy doesn’t like it and of course BC does. After all I am hard core.” She playfully shrugged. 

---

“And then she fucking blew me off to hang out with Mitch, can you believe that!” Butch complained. 

“I hate when she does that, always forgetting plans.” Bubbles sighed as she filed his nails and blew off the dust. 

He looked at his other hand examining the clean nails. “You don’t think I have to worry about him right?” 

She leaned over to look through her massive collection of nail polishes and pick a base coat and a dark green color and a pure black one. “Butch honey, he gay.” 

“I knew that.” He said quickly. He looked at the polish. “What about just clear?”

Bubbles looked at him and raised her brows. “You know its really punk and cool for guys to paint their nails, plus Buttercup thinks its hot but you didn’t here it from me.” She wagged her eyebrows and dangled the bottle in front of him. 

He snatched the black and shook it. “Paint me up Sugar.” 

--

“Aww I wish Boomie did something like that for me.” Bubbles cooed at the screen. 

“Sugar, they are just sitting on a gold course throwing grapes at each other.” He pointed out and she hit him with a pillow. “Watch the nails.” He lifted his hands. 

“I know its simple but Troy and Gabrielle are cute and hey, I’m a sucker for cute romance.” He was sure her eyes were full of stars at this point.  “Look they are dancing in the water!”

“How many times have you seen this?” 

“Twenty seven.” The oven in the kitchen dinged and she got up. “Cookies are done. You want milk too?”

“Hell ya.” 

She got up and walked away and he took out his phone. There was a message from Buttercup. 

Spice Babe: is she torturing you?

He held his phone up to snap a selfie of his cat ear hair band. 

Me: Nope but i look hot af now. Good luck keeping your paws off me. 

Spice Babe: lol sure btw this shit blows, be thankful youre not here

Me: sucks 2 be you but i got fresh cookies from bubbs

Spice Babe: Lucky bastard

The plate of cookies was set in front of him and he clicked his phone away as she paused the movie. 

“Buttercup having fun?”

“Nope but thats not my problem.” He grinned. “ So whats next?” he asked almost a bit too excitedly.  

Bubbles covered her mouth to finish chewing. “Well its getting late and I was gonna do a face mask and build a pillow fort.”

“oh.” He realized that it meant he should probably go. 

“Do you wanna make pillow forts and have a pillow fight? Oh and a sleep over!”

His eyes widened with a giant grin. “Fuck Yeah!” 

--

His neck almost popped as the pillow was slammed into his face and he had never seen the vicious look on her face before. Even with temporary tattoos and a sparkly face mask that smelt like berries, his was pink and strawberry scent, she was still scary. 

“Prepare to die!” She shouted as she raised a pillow over her head. 

“Oh shit.” He ducked and shot one back at her, hitting her in the stomach making her grunt. Her elbow knocked on the table and they watched as the homemade smoothies shook and almost spilled. 

Their eyes met and they busted out laughing before setting the pillows down. 

“Lets wash these off and then call it a night?” She said and he followed her to the bathroom. His feet were now inside bunny slippers that were a tad to small a she was rocking matching dog ones. 

He let out a yawn as she handed him a towel to dry his face and before long, they had shut off the lights and got into their pillow forts that were facing each other. 

“Thanks for hanging out with me. It means a lot.” She said and he looked at the ceiling. 

“I had fun. You’re pretty cool Sugar.” 

“I’m glad someone thinks so.” 

“Whats that mean?” He asked and he heard a small sigh. 

She held onto Octi and even though she couldn’t see his face, she knew he had a frown on. 

“Most people just think of me as the cute girl, which is true but im more than that. Sometimes even kicking a monsters ass doesn’t prove that I am strong and mighty.”

“Listen I know for a fact you are cool and strong. I got my ass handed to me by you once or twice in our child hood. Most people think im just some meat head who can punch.” 

“I don’t think that.” She said and he believed her. “I think you are really talented at sports and just like to punch, nothing wrong with that. But you are also kind and sweet and I see how you make Buttercup feel and some meat head couldn’t do that.” 

He smirked to himself. “Thanks Bubbles.” 

“Any time.”

A comfortable silence filled the room before he spoke up. “I really appreciate how much you care about Boomer. Its hard growing up without any form of love and every time he comes home, his smile is real and I know its because of you.”

Bubbles hugged Octi closer as a blush formed on her face after she sent Boomer a good night text. “He just makes me really happy.” 

“Thats good. But I am gonna kick his ass for not taking you on cute dates because my homie deserves is.” 

“Omg Butch are we bffs?”

“For sure.” And their shared laughter faded off as sleep took over.  

--

The morning came fast and the pair quickly cleaned everything up before homemade pancakes were eaten. 

“This shit is amazing Bubbs.” Butch finished his plate. 

“Aww thanks. Oh looks like everyone should be back in an hour.” 

He stood and took the plate to the sink. “Well I’ll get going because I don’t need Blossom on my ass about any of this.” 

“I can handle her don’t worry.” She winked and soon she was alone finishing up her pancakes with a smile.

--

The front door opened and Brick and Boomer came walking in. Brick slammed his body on the couch and went straight to sleep while Boomer went to the kitchen where Butch was making a grilled cheese. 

“I can’t believe you had a sleep over with my girlfriend.”

“Hi to you too. And chill we are just besties.” He winked. “Kinda lame that you never do any of this stuff with her.” He picked up the finished meal and bit into it before shaking his head at him. “Ya know, shes pretty cool and all she wants is to pamper and watch high school musical.”

“But you hate those things.” 

Butch shrugged. “Yeah but my new bestie doesn’t and I support queens.” 

Boomer gave him a weird look. “What did she do to you?”

He flipped him off, showing off his nails. “By the way she wants cuter dates. If you are going to simp then do it right Boomie.” He mocked before grabbing his plate. “Now if you’ll excuse me, Sugar and I are going to the mall fuck face.” 

Boomer frowned as he took all the food. “Hey don’t call her that!” 

“See ya later simp.” 

---

hope you liked :) 

[snowyseba]

Missed Chances - Part V

Summary: James Buchanan Barnes and Y/N are a match made in heaven, practically soul mates, but the problem is that they’ve never met. Theirs is a world of almosts. In the city of New York, anonymity is the norm. Each day you face a flux of new faces, most of them gone as quickly as they appeared. People flow in and out of the ever-changing city day in and day out. You could bump into someone on the street one day and never see them again. Unfortunately, that was the case for Y/N and Bucky. They’re meant to be…if only they ever get the chance to meet and turn their “almost” into reality.

Warnings: swearing

Word Count: 2k

The next morning, you somehow managed to drag yourself out of bed, despite the copious wine you had consumed with Peggy and Nat the night before. Sometime around 1:00 or 2:00, you and Nat had finally decided to call it a night and get an Uber back to your respective apartments. There had been a time when you were fine crashing on other people’s couches, but these days you’d rather be in the comfort of your own bed. If you attempted a night on the couch now, you’d more than likely end up feeling it the next day.

Trudging over to your kitchen, still yawning, you opened your cabinets in search of some food to quell your stomach which wasn’t feeling too great after a night of drinking, and most importantly, some coffee. You groaned at the contents, or rather the lack thereof. There was no coffee to be seen. Last time you went grocery shopping, you hadn’t been able to shake the feeling that you were forgetting something important, but couldn’t figure out what it was. Now you knew. Coffee. You had forgotten to get coffee.

Shutting the cabinet again, you sighed in frustration. At least it was the weekend, and you didn’t really need coffee, but you wanted it. It was part of your morning routine at this point, and it just wouldn’t feel right to start the day without it, especially after staying up later than you were used to.

There was a Starbucks just around the corner that you certainly could have gone to, but if you were going to be going out and you weren’t in any sort of rush, you figured you might as well head to your favorite café to treat yourself to some coffee and one of their homemade pastries. It would be a bit farther of a walk, but maybe the fresh air would do you some good as well.

Wanting to look at least somewhat presentable, you changed into a pair of leggings and a light sweater. It was finally warm enough that you didn’t need a jacket, but it was still a bit chilly in the mornings, which you didn’t mind. Soon it would be summer and the city would be hot and humid, and you weren’t in any hurry to be dealing with that. Before heading out the door, you grabbed your purse and your keys, which you tossed haphazardly into your purse after locking up.

As you had expected, the little café was absolutely packed. It was the weekend after all, and this place had the absolute best coffee in your neighborhood, plus they made their pastries fresh each morning, which always drew a crowd. On your walk, you had considered finding a space at the cafe and enjoying your breakfast there, but that clearly wasn’t going to be happening this morning. As it was, the line was almost out the door, and every last seat in the tiny café was occupied, and other customers were hovering, waiting to claim the first empty table they could find.

It looked like you would be getting your coffee and croissant to go, but that was fine, you rationalized. It would give you a chance to go home and try to unravel all the emotions from last night’s discovery. You still couldn’t quite believe that Bucky and your mystery cop were the same person, but at the same time, it sort of made sense, especially considering how convinced Peggy had been that you would like Bucky. It was funny, you thought, that neither of you had known just how right she was.

Part of you had hoped that this revelation would bring you some sort of peace; after all, you wouldn’t have to choose between Bucky or the mystery man, but at the same time, it placed all the more pressure on your first meeting. Despite knowing how silly it was, you had romanticized the idea of your mystery man, sometimes daydreaming about running into him again, or the scenarios in which you two would finally get a chance to talk. By not knowing his identity, you were safe in your fantasies.

Now that you knew exactly who he was, though, part of you was a bit afraid that he wouldn’t live up to the idea of him that you had created in your mind. Perhaps it was childish and naïve, but maybe the allure of this unidentified man was the fact that you were so unlikely to actually have any sort of relationship with him. The anonymity allowed you to keep up with your infatuation, but without any of the risks of heartache, pain, or attachment that came with a real relationship. If you never knew him, never knew his name, the pain of losing him wouldn’t be unbearable, whereas if things with Bucky went well, you would get attached, and to lose someone that you’re attached to is truly a horrible thing.

The line moved forward slowly, but you didn’t particularly mind. It’s not like you were in a rush, as you would have been if you were on your way to work.  Instead, you let your mind wander, only paying enough attention to your surroundings to step forward when the line advanced.

As you were getting close to the counter, a sudden vibration from within your purse caught your attention, and you quickly reached for your phone to check the notification. The name that popped up on the screen made your heart skip a beat.

“Miss?” the barista’s voice broke through the warm, excited haze that clouded your mind. Flushing with embarrassment, you realized that you were next and had been holding up the line, totally lost in your thoughts.

“Sorry,” you quickly murmured an apology, feeling a bit flustered. “I’ll just have a large latte and a chocolate croissant.”

“Coming right up!” The woman with brightly colored hair responded, “That’ll be $7.20, please.”

You rummaged in your purse, struggling slightly to locate your wallet. Maybe you should also add cleaning out your purse to your to-do list for the day, you thought. Finally grabbing your wallet, you handed the cashier your card. Just as you were about to put it away, your wallet slipped from your fingers, clattering to the dark wooden floor. Swearing under your breath, you reached down to grab it, only to have your fingers graze someone else’s.

“Oops, sorry!” You said automatically before locking eyes with the man in line behind you. The bright blue eyes that met yours were enough to make your heart skip a beat. It was Bucky. You could hardly believe your eyes. This was too much of a coincidence. You felt rude staring, but his gaze was fixed on you as well. You could practically see the gears turning in his head.

“Go figure,” he chuckled, running a hand through his hair, “it seems like I just can’t stop running into you. I figure it might finally be time for me to introduce myself. I’m Bucky.” He flashed you a grin, his eyes lighting up as he held out his hand for you to shake.

Before you could even process what you were saying, you blurted out, “I know,” regretting the words as soon as they left your lips.

His brow furrowed in confusion, and you certainly didn’t miss the apprehensive look that crossed his face as the two of you stepped aside so as not to hold up the line. He was confused, and perhaps a bit creeped out. Way to go, Y/N, you thought, already making a killer first impression.

“I’m Y/N,” you explained, offering a shy smile.

“Y/N?” He queried before his eyes widened in recognition, taking in your features all over again. “Y/N? As in the Y/N that Steve set me up with and I stood up like an asshole?”

“Uh, yeah,” you mumbled, feeling the heat quickly rising to your cheeks. “That would be me.”  

It seemed like he was having just as hard a time processing the situation as you were. He was silent for a few moments, before chuckling. “Well damn. Who would have thought the girl who’s been running through my mind and driving me crazy all these months would be the same one that Stevie was trying to set me up with. I’m starting to think that punk knows me a bit too well.”

“You’ve been thinking of me?” You asked, suddenly feeling quite giddy.

His cheeks instantly turned a bright shade of pink, and he averted his gaze, stumbling over his words. “I…I mean maybe a little. Was that weird for me to say? Sorry, doll, it’s been a while since I’ve done this. You think you can cut me a bit of slack?”

You shook your head, unable to stop yourself from grinning. “Not weird at all. If it makes you feel less awkward, I may have been thinking of you too.”

“You have?” He blurted out, eyes sparkling with happiness.

“Mhm. Ever since the day I bumped into you at that wine shop. I’ve gotta say, though, I’m still not fully over you grabbing the last bottle of my favorite wine, Bucky,” you teased.

“I’m sorry, doll. For what it’s worth, I did try to find you to give you the bottle. You looked pretty sad that I got to it before you, but you were gone before I could offer it. Either way, it sounds like I’ve got to make it up to you somehow,” he replied, the corner of his lips twitching up into a smirk as he regarded you. That was enough to make your heart flutter again. How could one man drive your senses crazy like this?

Trying to act coy, you shrugged, biting your lip, “Well, I know we were planning on getting dinner together on Friday, but coffee and pastries really do taste better when you enjoy them with someone else. I’ve got the coffee and the croissant, but it seems that I currently happen to be lacking someone to join me.”

“Oh? Is that so?” Bucky grinned. “I guess I can’t argue with that logic. I’d be happy to, doll, but I’ve got one condition: we have to keep our plans for Friday too.”

“I think there’s a very good chance of that, if you play your cards right, Bucky.”

“Then it’s a date?” He asked hopefully.

Taking his hand, you nodded, a blissful smile playing upon your lips. “It’s a date.”

Regardless of whether it was fate, chance, or pure luck that brought the two of you together, you were pretty sure that at this moment, you were the luckiest girl in the world. When you first ran into Bucky, you never would have imagined that you’d end up sitting across from him, enjoying your breakfast together, making plans for future dates, but at that moment, there was absolutely nowhere else in the entire world that you’d rather be.

[complicatedandstained]

The Other Day  at Hot Topic: The Lion, the Witch, and Marluxia

The Claire’s employees Marluxia had said were looking forward to meeting Xion look like they would much rather be watching beige paint dry. 

They remind her of back-up dancers that just stepped off the set of a punk rock music video, all tall, tat’d, and pierced, with lean muscle, barely concealed by skintight clothes. Blasé attitudes and dead tired. 

Xion had thought that flower crowns and purple aprons would make anybody look approachable, but she had been dead wrong. 

“I didn’t mean to eavesdrop or anything,” Xion continues quickly, waving her hands in front of her, “I promise!”

“Of course you didn’t,” the woman says in a falsely sweet voice. Her eyes return to examining her manicure. She’s gorgeous—looks like an Amazon who accidentally got a cute pixie cut. 

The other one doesn’t say much of anything, his eyes flitting out the store altogether like he has better places to be. He looks like a lion turned into a man, clad in metallic gold jeans and sporting a literal mane of untamed scarlet hair. Even his eyes are feline, lined with sharp, neat strokes of black. 

He sighs and slips his phone out of his apron pocket. “Why would she?” he mutters and whether he doesn’t believe Xion either or he’s challenging the Amazon is difficult to tell. 

Xion’s not sure which of them makes her more uncomfortable. She knows deep down she should be giving them the benefit of the doubt. She’s probably going to be spending a lot of time with them. 

They’re probably super nice once you get to know them. 

But it’s a little hard to convince herself when they look so miserable.

Marluxia seems to agree. He clears his throat again.

“So…” The Amazon perks up, running her hand back to adjust her lavender flower crown and giving Xion a once over like an unsatisfied military general picking out imperfections in her uniform. “You’re Kairi 3.0.” 

Xion doesn’t understand what she’s saying, and even if she did, she doesn’t think she can make her mouth do the talking thing. 

The lion man rolls his eyes. One hand lands on the hip of his eye-catching jeans and the other gestures to Xion with his phone. “She means to say that you look a bit like a couple of our coworkers,” Lion corrects in this smooth, almost gratingly lyrical voice.

Xion’s cheeks get so red they could probably glow in the dark. 

Oh. So they think I’m the stereotypical bubble-headed Claire’s employee, is that it? 

That stings a bit. I was hoping being pleasant and liking cute things would be a-okay here...

Having two more of me might be nicer than this. 

Marluxia groans then offers Xion an apologetic smile. “They mean to say it’s a pleasure to meet you.” He levels a hard glare at the pair of them, and it’s mildly reassuring that this at least isn’t the impression he was going for. “Really, you two...” 

He gives both of them another shoulder squeeze, and they scowl in unison. Realizing that they have, they smirk at each other, earlier tension apparently set aside for the time being. 

Marluxia lets them go and nods at Xion, pushing heavy bubble-gum pink hair off his shoulder wearily. “Sorry, darling. I only wish I could say they’re usually better behaved.” 

He can’t be much older than either of them, but his face is the dictionary definition of beleaguered dad, and Xion can’t help but giggle, even if it sounds bell-like and nervous to her own ears. 

Marluxia primly swishes his hand before her like a noble introducing a princess. “Larxene, Axel, I would like you to meet our newest associate, Zion.”

Xion smiles. If she had a dollar for every time someone accidentally called her the kingdom of heaven, she could start some kind of small, hood-wearing cult of her own. “Xion,” she corrects. 

“She-on?” he clarifies with raised eyebrows. 

Seriously, how is it that all of them have such good eyebrows?

Xion nods in encouragement.  

“Xion,” he corrects smoothly, drawing neatly manicured nails out toward the blonde Amazon, “Xion, this is Larxene.”

Larxene gives Xion a quick, businesslike handshake, and a purred, “Charmed, I’m sure,” that Xion can’t tell whether she means to be sarcastic, flirtatious, or just hella scary, but kind of comes off as all three. 

“Pleased to meet you,” Xion says anyway, smiling, telling herself maybe Larxene’s just having a bad day. 

Marluxia clears his throat emphatically again, though Larxene does not look particularly apologetic. Marluxia swishes his fingers toward the lion man. 

“And this is...” Marluxia pauses for the other man to introduce himself.

The lion’s arms are crossed and he doesn’t reach out a hand or even react until Marluxia repeats his name. He texts another few words and lowers his phone, half smiling. “Good news. Demyx says crisis averted.”

Larxene laughs sharply. “And you believe him?”

“Excellent,” Marluxia replies dryly. “Now you can put it away and introduce yourself.”

“Really was a crisis, Mars,” Axel insists, slipping the phone back into his pocket and peering down at Xion like he’s a little surprised to see she’s still there. He nods. “Hey there.”

Maybe he’s...also having a bad day?

“Axel,” Marluxia concludes for him, just a note of irritation, “your name is Axel.” 

The lion’s eyes narrow, his lips quirk. “Thanks for the info, Marly.”

“Axel,” Xion repeats, and she can feel her brows bouncing up. Why does that sound so familiar?

“That’s it,” the lion man—Axel—has a grin like he’s planning to eat somebody. “Get it memorized. You’re gonna need it.”

“She doesn’t need to memorize it,” Larxene objects, poking the little metal name plate clipped to the man’s purple apron. “You’re wearing a nametag, dipshit.”

“Oh,” Axel glances down to confirm, straightens up, “Huh. So I am.” But he’s paying more attention to Xion now, which is not an entirely welcome sensation. His eyes kind of narrow in and burn. 

Marluxia seems anxious to keep the ball rolling, “Axel’s our resident piercing artist. He’s very good at what he does, but he has trouble with the concept of ‘dress code.’” He turns to Xion, nodding at her wardrobe choice in approval. “You may want to think of him as a counter-example. If Axel’s wearing it, you probably shouldn’t be. Today being an exception, although from the sound of it,” he smirks ever-so-slightly, like he can’t help but find nagging Axel a little bit amusing, “that was largely an accident.”

Axel’s tight black tee literally has Let’s Fucking Dance printed across the chest of it in slate gray cursive, but Marluxia doesn’t seem to have noticed, and Xion’s not sure now is the right time to bring it up.

“Yeah, yeah, I scare the children, I’ve heard it before…” Axel’s hands gesture dismissively. Free of his phone he seems livelier. One hand pats Xion’s shoulder. “I don’t think you’re going to have to worry about that with My Little Care Bear here.” 

That feels a little uncalled for and a lot condescending.

Xion can feel the burn in her cheeks travelling to her ears. He’s officially her least favorite. 

Marluxia adjusts a bending display sign, beside Axel’s shoulder. “I just want her to realize that we do have standards.”

Xion feels a little burnt on Axel’s behalf, but he just smirks lazily. “I hope you’re also going to tell her that Larxene is our customer service counter-example.” 

Sign corrected, Marluxia pockets his hands. “That goes without saying.” 

Larxene doesn’t look up from her manicure. “You’re both assholes.” 

“Case in point,” Marluxia replies glancing around to ensure no customers heard this latest remark and looking relieved to find no one nearby. “Anyway, Xion, one of these fine, upstanding employees has volunteered to train you this morning.”

Xion’s mouth tries to shape an objection, her lips opening and closing like a goldfish. She kind of hoped Marluxia would be taking the reins on this one.

 “Volunteered.” Larxene snorts. “That’s cute.”

Axel tilts his head, sparing Xion another glance, grinning. “Marly, you’re really cracking the whip here.”

“I’m sorry!” Xion says immediately, eyes feeling hot, wishing she could train herself. Her boot scuffs uselessly along the carpet. “I don’t mean to be a burden!”

“Hey, hey,” Axel’s saying before Xion’s even done apologizing, smile evaporating. He steps up to her side, hands spreading in the air as if to physically smooth things over. “Not to worry, Newbie, I’ve got you covered.”

“Really?” Xion blinks up at him, trying not to cringe. 

He elbows her arm, winks at her, stage whispers, “Least until someone nicer arrives.”

“Uh… Thank you, Axel. I’m… I’m sure you’re perfectly nice.”

Axel gives her a brief flash of teeth that it wouldn’t be fair to call a smile. “I’m basically Prince Charming.”

Marluxia gets a little divot between his brows and shakes his head slightly. “Behave.”

“Right, right. So.” Axel steps past Larxene, hopping up into the adult sized chair at the piercing station. He plucks a sharp looking piece of equipment from the depths of his apron pockets. “How squeamish are you?”

Xion takes an involuntary step back. 

“Axel.” Marluxia palms his forehead. “Maybe start with something else?”

“Oh.” Axel glances at Xion, brows bouncing in concern that Xion has trouble believing. “Sure thing, boss.”

Larxene gives Xion a sympathetic grimace and a brief flutter of her fingers. “Good luck with that, 3.0.” She struts off to man the register, where the Christmas shopping mom has wrangled her kids. 

“Right, well, Xion, I’ll clock you in. I’ll be in the back for a bit if you need me.” Marluxia glances down at an elegant wristwatch, and observes, “Aurora should be here to relieve Axel by noon. That is, if she hasn’t overslept again…”

Xion’s not sure if this comment is meant to reassure her, Marluxia, or Axel, so she just hums. 

Axel smirks, says, “Roger that, Captain.” Axel’s tone and the tiny, cheeky salute he pairs with it, feel almost… flirtatious?

Xion blushes. 

Marluxia stiffens for a half second, like he’s second guessing several life choices that have led him to this moment, but then he gives his head another little shake, chuckles, and starts to walk off.

Xion wonders how Roxas would feel to know this mall has so many flirty red heads on the loose. What are the odds? Two doors down and...

Wait… What are the odds?

Axel. His name had sounded so familiar. Axel. 

Axel gives an exaggerated sigh of relief. “Alright, he’s gone. Just got to check on somebody…” He’s already spinning in the piercing seat, phone set on the table, so Xion doesn’t feel too bad slipping hers out as well. Scrolling through the notifications from the contact nicknamed “Twin” and skimming until she finds the right messages, hoping to read another name typed there instead. 

The three(!) text messages about one man. Apart from calling him ‘ridiculously attractive’, they hadn’t even been that romantic. But there had been three(!) of them. From Roxas. Roxas who never wants to talk about boys, never gets crushes—I basically don’t have a heart, I didn’t even love my ex, I don’t know what I’m doing wrong—Roxas. 

But. There it is. Plain as day.

Axel. Axel. Axel.

[lids-flutter-open]

James orsino -goth gay YA ch 5

“Hey,” Orsino said. He was smiling at me. “Nice to see you. James, right?”

“And you’re Orsino.”

“I’m Robin,” said a girl with good skin and short hair in a flat-top. She looked like a panel from a 1980s lesbian comic. “I’m Orsino’s sister.”

“Hi,” I said. “Does anyone want weed?”

They did. We smoked and January talked to Ian. I didn’t get all of what they said, but Ian was glowing. Overhead the trees dropped a few leaves and some of the pine needles from the scrubby little pine tree by the house blew over the yard and into the bonfire, sparking as they went. There were at least fifty people at the show. Probably more, inside the house and around in front where they weren’t meant to be. People were slowly trickling back around the edges of the show space in the garage, waiting for the temperature inside to finally get cool enough to repopulate. 

“So are you from around here?” I asked Orsino. “Or where?” I had given him a joint I’d rolled earlier and been carrying around in my cigarette case. He coughed a lot as he smoked.

“Down south about an hour,” Orsino said. “Near Centralia, kind of. But most of the time lately I live up in Tacoma with Robin and January. My dad owns some cows and a chicken farm and my mom is always fighting with him and it’s bad to be around. You?”

“I’m from here,” I said. “I’m in high school. One of the ones near the farms. It’s all rednecks. No gays really.”

“You go to that Compton House thing?” Orsino asked. “I know that’s like, a big thing for gay kids here. My therapist was trying to get me to go since I didn’t like the trans group in Tacoma.”

“I go,” I said. “I’m on the Speakers’ Bureau doing sex education at schools and public organizations and stuff.”

“Oh,” Orsino said. He waggled his eyebrows. “You know a lot about sex then?” He exhaled some of the smoke from his joint into my face and smiled.

“In the public health sense, anyway,” I said. “I know where to get condoms and free dental dams.” I paused. I really wanted to say something flirtatious, but wasn’t sure what to start with. “And I know from Delaney and Genet and White for the rest, though who knows what I’m missing in that sense.” I could feel my hands reach up and touch the bad little patch of stubble on my neck. I wished there was a mirror or a dark window around I could glance into to make sure I didn’t look like a fool. I crossed my legs and turned more towards Orsino.

“Don’t know who those guys are,” Orsino smirked. His eyes were really dark brown and the firelight was sort of reflected there. I couldn’t tell if he was making fun of me for the references or making fun of me for doing sex education as a teenager like some kind of Young Democrat. I didn’t know his vibe enough to tell.

“They’re all older. Delaney’s the one you’re supposed to read, I’m pretty sure,” I said. “Or at least, he’s the one most likely to have been read by hot people, from what I can tell.”

“Oh, it’s a book,” said Orsino. 

“He’s an author,” I said. “Samuel Delaney. Chip Delaney. Time Square Red, Time Square Blue. Science fiction and sexy gay memoir. Never mind. I’m stoned. I’m sorry.”

“He writes about sex and taught you sex, is what you’re saying.”

“Yeah.”

“Does he write about like specific kinks you were trying to communicate to me or something?”

I felt my face grow hot. “Public bathrooms,” I said. “Is one thing he’s very into. Not that I am. Unless you are. But that’s not—it’s just his prose.”

“Do you always give a … what’s it called. A bibliography. Do you always do that when someone asks you about sex?”

“Do you always ask boys about sex two seconds after meeting them?”

“Only when they’re hot,” Orsino said. “Then yeah, I do. Sorry, I can’t read social cues well. Was that out of line?”

“No.”

“You didn’t answer the question. You go around give out bibliographies about sex? Like that pink hair lady who draws that weird comic about sex toys online?”

“You’re the one named fucking Orsino,” I said. “Literary references are something you signed up for.” I took a hit from my pipe. I was starting to feel slightly more comfortable, but it wasn’t happening fast enough. I glanced at Orsino’s hands. The nails were short. His pinky nail on his left hand was painted black but none of the other fingernails were. There was a little stick-and-poke of a rabbit on the back of his right hand.

“Maybe I should change it,” he said. “To something butch. I can be Harry. Or Brandon.”

“A trade name,” I said. 

“A farm boy name.”

“Brandon is a G.O.P candidate name.”

“Now that’s trade.”

“What music do you like, Brandon?”

“Well, I’m here. OVID’s good. January can be a bitch a little bit, but it’s good music. And I like Dyke Drama and G.L.O.S.S, obviously. And LOONE. But also Mitski. And Blood Kennel and Limp Wrist and Dick Binge. But I also like The Shins.”

“My dad likes The Shins,” I said. “I have like a gag reflex about The Shins.” I could hear my voice, catty and faggy. “They’re such a dad band. How old are you, anyway?”

“Eighteen,” Orsino said.

“Okay. Well, for an eighteen-year-old you sure like dad bands.”

“It’s good music,” Orsino said. “You gotta listen to the lyrics. What about you?”

“I only listen to Ariana Grande,” I said, smirking at him stupidly and fluttering my eyelashes. I might have been being dumb, but he was still smiling at me, so I wanted to try being bolder. “And Gaga. I literally only listen to Just Dance by Lady Gaga and Pete Davidson by Ariana Grande every single day of my life. On repeat. I hate punk music.”

“Oh, really,” Orsino said in a flat-affect kind of voice. “You must be having a really interesting time here tonight then.”

“It’s really funny music,” I said. “And nobody is wearing platform boots or a rainbow pin or jewels or teal hair or anything.”

“I saw someone with teal hair,” Orsino said.

“That was me, actually. Earlier. I came with teal hair and an Ariana Grande tour shirt and changed.”

“Oh really,” Orsino said. He made eye contact with me and then slowly reached out and pulled at one of my curls. “I like what you’ve done with your hair since then. Insta-dye job to black. Insta-goth. It’s a really cute haircut on you, actually.”

“Thanks. I did it in the bathroom sink,” I said. “Just now. Using charcoal from the fire. I thought, oh no, everyone has dark hair or bad orangey dry bleach jobs. I have to fit in.”

“You’re doing good and blending in,” Orsino said. He finished the joint and ground out the end in the dirt under the stump. “Wait. Did you just neg me for my bleach job?” 

I felt my face fall. “What?”

“You said bad bleach jobs and looked at my hair. Were you making fun of me for my bleach job? You know, negging me? I know it’s all dry forest fire thatch up here.”

“I guess I did,” I said. I looked at his hair and back at his eyes. 

“Didn’t expect you to be acting like a straight English major goth at a sorority party over here,” Orsino said. “Calling all the girls ugly cause you think it’ll make them like you.”

I swallowed. “You’re right. That was cruel of me. I made fun of your name, earlier, too, and that was wrong. I shouldn’t be mean to cute boys.” 

“And my music taste.”

“That’s just a difference of opinion.”

Orsino looked at me like a cat playing with a mouse, but in a friendly way. “You were very cruel about my hair, though. I feel so small.”

“Sorry. It’s a bad habit. You can do two negs for me now. Tell me I’m ugly so you can hit on me better.”

“Hm,” Orsino said. He swung one hairy leg over the stump so half of him was in shadow under the trees and his right foot was nestled in the ivy and broken glass that lay all along the perimeter of the Goat Mansion yard. “Well, you aren’t ugly, so I can’t do exactly that. Maybe I want to save my negs. Find your weak spots and then go in for the kill.”

“I’m shaking,” I said. 

“Okay. I have one. My first one is that your mustache sucks. It’s like really cute that you’re trying it and I know what you’re going for, and the concept is attractive to me, and I like your philtrum, but it’s a bad mustache.”

“Ooh. Ouch. That stings,” I said. “I think it stings more because of all the compliments you threw in with it to cushion it.” But I scooted closer to him.

“I can do more.” He looked at me hard. “If you consent. I can be meaner about it.”

“About my mustache? Okay,” I said. “But I might be hurt and never speak to you again.”

“You’re trying to look like Freddie Mercury or something, right? You look like a summer camp counselor from the 1980s.”

“Ouch! You sure snatched my wig.” I put on a faggy voice. It kind of did sting to hear him say that, though also I knew that my mustache amounted to about twenty-four downy bad little hairs. But I guess I deserved it.

“See how it feels?” Orsino scooted a little closer. I found myself appreciating how broad his shoulders and torso were compared to mine. I looked at his smile. His canines were a little crooked.

“I actually am a summer camp counselor,” I said. “During the summer.”

“I’m Sherlock Holmes.”

“I can give you another weak spot,” I said. “I’m a nerd and I used to be a horse girl. Got any horse related disses?”

“It doesn’t count if you give them to me. That’s a self defense maneuver. Also I don’t know if you’re even telling the truth. It’s gotta be something you’re sensitive about.”

“Are you sensitive about your hair and your name?”

“Yes! I’m a punk. My image is very important to me. Talking shit on my hair was mean. You started this whole battle.”

“Okay, fine. I’m sorry already. But give me time to recover from your first cutting remark before you do any more to me.” I put away my pipe. I glanced briefly over at Ian. Jukebox had left and now he was talking to Opal and Robin a few feet away. I felt like socially I was obligated to join their shit instead of sitting here talking to this boy I didn’t really know yet. At least so I could be up on the whole deal with Miss San Juan and the Dusties or whatever the new band was called. “Do you want to meet my friends?” I asked Orsino, standing. 

“Sure,” he said. He pulled himself up. “Hey, you’re not really hurt about the mustache thing, right?” He wasn’t smiling as much any more.  “I was just playing around. Your mustache is fine. It looks like every other high school punk’s mustache. Better than some. Better than mine. And you’re cute. You pull it off pretty good.”

I realized he thought he had misstepped and now I’d lost interest. I felt a flutter in my stomach. 

“It’s a really sensitive topic for me because of my gender dysphoria,” I said in a deadpan voice. I walked over to Ian and Opal and Robin.

Orsino followed me, squinting a little as if he couldn’t tell if I was joking. He put his thumbs into the belt loops of his pants.“Are you serious?” He asked.  "I’m sorry, I…”

“I won’t ever forgive you. Hey, meet my friends. Here are my friends Opal and Ian, who I guess have a band now.”

Ian paused. He had been saying something to Robin about some music stuff. I wasn’t sure what equipment they were talking about but it had hertz. He looked over to Orsino and then me and raised his eyebrows. 

“Hey,” he said. “I’m Miss San Juan, otherwise known as Ian. You saw me set up and then saw my set just now. You were jumping. Didn’t get your name.”

“I was indeed jumping,” Orsino said. “It was a pretty good show for how messy it seemed like things were before it started. You did good. You have a great stage presence. I’m Orsino.” He held out his hand, arcing his arm out for a man-handshake. 

Ian placed his delicate little hand in Orsino’s big one like a princess greeting her security guard. “Pleased to meet you.”

“I’m Orsino,” Orsino said again to Opal, holding out his hand again. For the first time I realized he was maybe kind of too stoned.

“I’m Opal,” said Opal. “I’m a drummer and use they/them pronouns and I’m really hungry for some trash food right now. Does anyone else want food?” They looked at me and then at Orsino. “You both look like you want some trash food.”

“Fuck yeah,” Orsino said. “Do we know when the next show starts, though?”

“There’s the gas station that doesn’t sell beer around the corner that way,” Opal said. “They have chips and sometimes hot dogs and pizza. We’ll be quick.”

“Let’s go,” Orsino said. He put his arm around my shoulders and set off toward the edge of the yard as if we had been walking together like that everywhere for years, as if he had touched me before.

“I don’t think I want food right now,” Ian said. “I’ll stay here.” He had a sort of quiet, wan tone in his voice that made me pause.

“Oh,” I said, and dug my feet into the ground to stop and pulled away from Orsino’s arm. I looked from Orsino to Ian. I didn’t want to leave Ian standing here alone right after his big set. “Ian, are you sure? You’ll need calories in a little bit.”

“I just feel like standing and smoking for a second in the quiet over here by the fence,” Ian said. 

“Quieter out by the gas station,” I said.

“I don’t feel like walking.”

“I’ll stay here too then,” I said. 

“I’m still going,” Orsino said. “I’m genuinely hungry.”

“Come on, then, big papa,” Opal said. “Let’s get some cheese fuel.” They turned their chair and wheeled fairly rapidly across the grass. 

[balancedpluto]

All arcana asks ;)

I hate u so much Hayden. Putting it under a read more cuz HECK this is a lot. Also u can clearly tell Rose is my most fleshed out apprentice lmao. U can also tell when I started to burn out lol. THIS TOOK ME ALL DAY HECK

1. Name? Surname?Rose LaFontaineAaron (???)Lyra (???)

2. Any Family?Rose: she has a sister who’s 10 years older than her named Yvette, she’s a pirate. And her mother still lives in Fantasy France.Aaron: SO MANYLyra:….she doesn’t like to talk about it

3.Any Familiar?Rose: A bull mastiff named Mika who can change in size (so she can fit in a pocket or be the size of a horse, at her will)Aaron: A bearded dragon named Sir Slappy Skiddaddly the Third Lyra: A cute little rat named Pixie

4.Asra, Nadia, or Julian?Rose: JulianAaron: AsraLyra: Nadia

5. Best strength in magic?Rose: IllusionsAaron: Fire magic. Anyone who follows Eereree saw this coming.Lyra: the creation and manipulation of light

6. Favorite color?Rose: Maroon or light pink Aaron: Red. Surprise surprise Lyra: Purple

7. Favorite number?Rose: 69Aaron: 420Lyra: HOW DID YOU TWO ANSWER THAT SO FAST??? Uhh, 7?

8. Sexuality?Rose: BiAaron: PanLyra: Lesbian

9. Weird hobby?Rose: not really weird so much as unexpected for her, but she likes to sew and knit.Aaron: Weed lmaoLyra: Buying books but never actually getting around to reading them.

10. Favorite season?Rose: SpringAaron: FallLyra: Spring as well

11. Favorite weather?Rose: Sunny, but not hot.Aaron: Thunderstorms Lyra: Drizzly

12. Favorite place in Vesuvia?Rose: The Raven, or Mazelinka’s place. She loves that lady like she was her own grandmother.Aaron: The market. That pumpkin bread thoLyra: The palace library

13. How does their laughter sound like?Rose: Sober, its a soft almost teasing giggle. Drunk, loud cackling. Both are very charming in their own way.Aaron: LOUDLyra: giggling and soft snorting

14. How do they look like when they cry?Rose: She doesn’t cry often so when she does its…a lot. Loud gross sobbing often accompanied by yelling. Its not pretty.Aaron: Ghibli tears. You can’t convince me otherwise.Lyra: A lot of sniffling

15. What do they like to wear?Rose: Long dresses/skirts with low cut tops. Her brests are her best asset and she’s gonna show em whether you like it or not.Aaron: Tits out. That’s all u need to know.Lyra: Long, modest cut dresses with a corset. Very simple, but she always looke nice.

16. What are their fears?Rose: Fears? Don’t know her. (Actually death, which is…ironic considering the circumstances)Aaron: Abandonment. And cockroaches.Lyra: Rejection. The dark.

17. What do they like to do Friday night?Rose: put on fancy lingerie, get wasted, and play card games.Aaron: Blaze it lmaoLyra: (cuddling with Nadia) Reading

18. Do they use makeup?Yes. All 3 of them.

19. Favorite food?Rose: Mama LaFontaine’s crepesAaron: Spicy Vegetarian ChiliLyra: Cookies (technically not FOOD, but sweets are her big weakness)

20. Favorite drink?Rose: Rosé wine. Sounds redundant considering her name, but thats why she likes it. Growing up she thought it was named after her.Aaron: Just water, surprisingly.Lyra: Green tea

21. Zodiac sign?Rose: CancerAaron: Cancer Lyra: Aquarius(I dont care i have two apprentices that are the same sign leave me alone)

22. Day of birth?Honestly haven’t even thought if that lmao

23. Favorite movie?Rose: Heathers. She loves a bad bitch movie.Aaron: Shrek. Lyra: Not really a movie person tbh. She likes Disney stuff tho.

24. Favorite music genre?Rose: Classic rock or indie. Also has an interest in things involving old or obscure instruments.Aaron: Pop PunkLyra: Soft indie or video game soundtracks

25. Favorite song?Rose: Over the Hills and Far Away- Patty GurdyAaron: It’s Never Sunny in South Philadelphia-The Wonder YearsLyra: Youth- Daughter

26. Favorite TV show?Rose: Likes to watch cooking shows cuz its usually the only thing good onAaron: Doesn’t really do TVLyra: Also not really into TV, will put on like, QVC or something for background noise tho (im guilty of this)

27. What is their style?Rose: Like i said before. Long skirt, tits OUT.Aaron: Lazy but somehow manages to look hot? How does he do that???Lyra: Simple and modest, but always in pretty colors.

28. Any mental health issues?Rose: She has some anger issues, along with a tendency to bottle everything upAaron: hrrhgghh i haven’t gotten that deep with him WHOOPSLyra: Really bad anxiety

29. Any health issues in general?Not really?

30. Are they human?Yeah….or are they dancer?

31. Favorite book?Rose: She honestly can’t remember the last time she had time to read for fun.Aaron: Wtf is a book lolLyra: Don’t make her choose for the love of god

32. Favorite book genre?The person writing these questions assumes I know books lmao

33. Favorite time of the day?Rose: SunsetAaron: Early afternoonLyra: Like, really early morning. My sweet child why are you awake this early

34. If they weren’t a magician, who would they be?Rose: A pirate like her sister. Unless this is meant as like a modern AU then she’d probably sew and knit cute things and sell them online.Aaron: Probably a video game youtuber tbhLyra: Not much different, only she’d run a little mom and pop knick knack/ book store instead of a magic shop

35. Do they believe in ghosts?Yeah

36. Do they believe in aliens?Kind of?

37. Do they like sports?What is this…sport you speak of?

38. How do they look like?Sexy

Rose: 

Aaron:

Lyra:

(art by @willowwish64 )

39. What is their biggest motivation to solve the Lucio’s killer mystery?Rose: To clear Julian’s name Aaron: To make sure it wasn’t him and he just doesn’t remember. I mean…fire is kinda his thing, so…Lyra: To put Nadia’s mind at ease

40. What do they think of Lucio so far?Rose: “He’s an asshole.”Aaron: “Goatman! Fuck you, goatman!”Lyra: “I can never look at a goat again without feeling terrified”

41. What do they think of Nadia so far?Rose: “She’s the kind of woman I strive to be. I have so much respect for her.”Aaron: “A smart, capable woman. Also really hot like wowie.”Lyra: “She’s so amazing and so beautiful and i don’t know why she likes me so much, I’m so dull compared to her and-” (this can go on for hours)

42. What do they think of Asra so far?Rose: “A great friend and mentor. I’d do anything for him.”Aaron: “He’s like…a human sheep…but really skinny…imagine hugging cotton candy filled with bones…its amazing. Also dat ass.” (He loves him but he’s bad at serious answers)Lyra: “A close friend to whom i owe my life”

43. What do they think of Julian so far?Rose: “Oh, Julian. How do i begin to describe how i feel about him? I’ve never met someone who’s so smart and witty yet so dumb? And he’d do anything for you but doesn’t think he deserves the same, even though he does. And, well, i could go on but the long and the short of it is, I love that idiot.”

Aaron: “He’s like a taller, hotter version of me AND IM SO PISSED”Lyra: “he sure is…something”

44. What do they think of Portia so far?Rose: “My future sister in law???? I love her so much! ”Aaron: “She’s…so small…my god im surrounded by small people”Lyra: “She’s so lovely!! She’s like my best friend!”

45. What do they think of Muriel so far?Rose: “He…doesn’t like to talk much does he? And he’s so…TALL. Makes you wonder about…things.”Aaron: “Him big. ”Lyra: “He…kind of scares me a bit? ”

46. Do they like animals?OF COURSE

47. Are they allergic to anything?Nope

48. Do they have any talents (except magic)?Rose: Again, she’s really good at sewing/knittingAaron: He can lick his elbow. And he shows off his “skill” to everyone. Charming i know.Lyra: She’s really good with animals

49. Do they get drunk easily?Rose: No, she can hold her liquor pretty well. She usually just gets tipsyAaron and Lyra: YES

50 .What is their personality type?*fart noises*

51. What is their worst negative quality?Rose: She tends to dodge any question that’ll make her show any negative emotion. Being with Julian is kind of helping her with that, since he needs her support and she feels okay talking about this stuff with him. Also she tends to be kind of overly sexual. She doesn’t really mean to, it just happens.Aaron: He tends to take serious things as a joke sometimes.Lyra: She likes to just, avoid people. She’d rather just be alone by her own choice than face rejection.

52. What is their best positive quality?Rose: She’s like a mom? You wouldn’t think that on the surface, but she’s actually really warm and motherly.Aaron: So fucking funny.Lyra: She has a heart of gold

53. What is their position to fall asleep?Rose: She likes to fall alseep with Julian resting his head on her chest and petting his hair. Motherly instincts, i guess. Also it’s the only surefire way of making sure he sleeps. If she’s alone, on her stomach or side with her arms under the pillow.Aaron: Starfish. Asra just has to deal with it, i guess.Lyra: Curled up with Nadia. It’s where she feels safest.

54. The most uncomfortable moment they ever experienced?Rose: (spoilers) Finding out she died. Considering death is her greatest fear, it was especially hard for her to swallowAaron: When his brother found out him and Asra were fuckin…and he found out his brother and Nadia were fuckinLyra:…..

55. Their happiest memory?Rose: When she first came to Vesuvia. It was kinda scary, but there’s SO MUCH TO SEE!!Aaron: Getting Slappy. Lyra: Finding out Nadia likes her back. She nearly fainted.

56. Do they blush?Rose: Not really, if she does its hard to tellAaron: SometimesLyra: YES

57. Are they clumsy?Nah

58. Do they like jokes? Of course, they’re people, arent they?

59. How do they flirt?Rose: VERY direct. She’s not afraid to let people know what she wants.Aaron: “Hey cookin’, what’s lookin’?”Lyra: oh god she’s so bad at it help her

60. Favorite fruit?Rose: StrawberryAaron: Orange Lyra: Kiwi

[fantastic-fantasy-fanfics]

LOOK AT THE FISHIES

This is for @soldatbarnes writing challenge!!!  Thank you for letting me participate, love! <3

A/N: also, this is kind of an AU where Chase hasn’t died and he’s settled down with his SO.

Chase Collins x reader

Word count: 1733

Summary: you’ve had a really bad week, so Chase decides to make it better.

Warnings: sad reader, work stress, Chase being a jerk (but he fixes it)

(GIF not mine)

This week had been absolutely AWFUL.  You started out hopeful and optimistic about the new work week and were ready to tackle any task your manager could throw at you!  That was until after lunch on Monday.

You thought you were getting a bunch done!  You had already budgeted out the next couple months, made your reports about expected profits, and even got started on your marketing presentation!  Then you got to your desk and realized… “HOLY SHIT, THESE ARE THE WRONG FILES!”.  You had used the budget for June and switched it with July, accidentally wrote the profits from the holiday season on the spring term sheets, and your computer crashed, getting rid of all your presentation research and company statistics!

Tuesday was no better, you had to get your computer fixed, meet up with your supervisor to turn in your reports for the past quarter, and you had an interview to conduct with a potential new intern.

Your entire job depended on your laptop and the internet, but your computer wasn’t going to be fixed until Monday of the next week!  That meant you’d be struggling with good ol’ pencils and calculators for the next three days.  After that, your train was late and you nearly missed your meeting!  You were over twenty minutes late and your supervisor was not happy.

The interview with the intern was a NIGHTMARE.  It was a punk kid, fresh out of college who thought the world owed him everything… and that he could get in your pants with some disturbing hip gyration and vulgar pick-up lines.  Needless to say, he was not getting that job.

Wednesday was a shit storm.  You had to pick up the slack of your co-worker who was on maternity leave.  Normally, this wouldn’t be a problem…. Except you were still working like a KINDERGARTNER WITH A CALCULATOR!  At this point, you had to start skipping lunch to actually get things done.  And you normally don’t have time for breakfast so you’re only eating a cold dinner when you get home.  That was also the day that your heel got stuck in a vent grate and you nearly got run over by a taxi.

Point is, you had a horrible week and were ready for it to be over.  Luckily, it was finally Friday, seven o’clock, now you were officially allowed to go home.  With how much work you had and how slow you were progressing through it, your boss told you, “it would be in the company’s best interest if you work overtime to get your workload done,”.  You know he didn’t intend to be harsh or mean to you, he was just wanting this busy time to pass smoothly, but it still hurt and frustrated you.

You lugged yourself onto the train, plopping down on the seat with a huff.  You were exhausted, frustrated, and about ready to cry by the time you got home.

You walked the six blocks back to your apartment, your feet aching as your shoes rubbed blisters into your feet.  You opened the door, dropping your things on the floor, kicking off your heels, and plopping down on the couch.  You cringed, remembering you promised your boyfriend/ roommate, Chase, that you would wash the dishes when you got home.

“Welcome home baby,” Chase smiled, quietly walking into the room in his comfy looking pajamas.  You smiled as you saw he was wearing the pajamas you got him last Christmas, the duck ones you got as a joke.  “How was work?” he asked, rubbing your back soothingly.

“I never want to go back,” you groaned, sitting up to take your blazer off, “that weird, creepy coworker, Randy, he wouldn’t stop flirting with me!  I had to yell at him to make him go away, and he got petty and decided to drop another stack of paperwork on my desk!”

“That sounds really sucky, I’m sorry babe,” he sighed, sitting you on his lap as he crawled on the couch, “why don’t you get yourself something to eat, then get to bed, I’ll finish up the chores,”

“You’re the best, baby,”

The next day, you didn’t wake up until almost noon.  You had been waking up at four in the morning for the past couple days and you weren’t getting to sleep until eleven each night, so a good sleep on a full stomach was exactly what you needed.

You wandered into the kitchen, following the wonderful smell of cheap macaroni and cheese.  “Mmm… lunch is ready?” you asked, hugging Chase from behind, resting your head in between his shoulder blades.  He was always so cuddly and soft.

“You betcha!” he smiled, moving your hand so he could kiss your palm, “I know how much you like this stuff, and you’ve been so stressed, so I thought you could use a treat today,”

“You’re wonderful, you know that?” you smiled, kissing his cheek.

After a deliciously cheap meal and a few colas later (burping contest included) Chase wanted to take you out for a “special surprise”.  He insisted you wear comfy clothes and walking shoes because “you’re not wearing that wretched monkey suit to our magical destination!”.  His words, not yours.

You decided to wear some shorts and your favorite Batman shirt, and of course, your high-top converse.  Once you were all ready, you tried walking out the door, but Chase wouldn’t have it!  “You’ve been on your feet enough, I’m carrying you,” he said.  Before you could even protest, he had you on his back and was giving you a piggyback ride to the train.

He took you down to the city and hailed a taxi to take you to your “magical destination”, and that’s when curiosity started to take over…

“So, where are we going?” you asked casually.

“You’ll see,” he smiled, turning to tell the driver where he wanted to go.  And he did so quietly, just so you wouldn’t hear him!  Sneaky little bastard.

“Please tell me?  I just have to know!” you begged like an impatient child.

“You’ll see when we get there,”

You looked out the window, hoping you could guess where Chase was taking you by what you saw.  “Are we going to… the zoo?”

“Kind of,”

“How do you ‘kind of’ go to the zoo?  Do you stand outside the gate?”

No matter how much you guessed, he wouldn’t tell you, and that was really frustrating.  But, you didn’t bug him about it too much, because he was trying to do something nice for you.

“We’re here,” he smiled, paying the cab fare and helping you out of the taxi.  You excitedly looked at the huge building in front of you.  There was a huge gate, decorated with shells and sea creatures, and the facility itself looked like Poseidon's palace!

“The Aquarium!?” you gasped, jumping up and down

“Yeah, I thought this would be fun!” he answered, holding your hand and kissing your cheek.

And it was fun!  Chase showed you the jellyfish exhibit; it was his favorite part.  And then he wanted you to see the turtles!  There was even a tide-pool exhibit where you could pet horseshoe crabs!  You pointed out that they looked like Darth Vader’s face with legs coming out of it.

You were waiting in the bleachers for the dolphin show to start when you noticed Chase wasn’t sitting next to you anymore.  As a little twinge of panic set in, you saw that he was coming back, this time with a big, plastic bag in his hands.  “What’s that?” you asked

“Nothing,” he shrugged.  He was hiding something…

After the dolphin show, you asked if you could pet the stingrays, of course, he agreed.

“It feels like a wet hotdog,” you giggled, brushing your fingers against the back of the sea creature’s body for the third time.

“Or a slick kiwi slice,” Chase giggled back, placing a kiss on your temple, “hey, they have an underground fish observation room if you want to see that,”

“Ooh!  Yeah I wanna see that!” you cheered, grabbing his hand and rushing towards the door.

“Uh, babe, you might want to disinfect your hands first,” he reminded, pointing to the hand sanitizer by the wall.

You two were some of the only people down there; guess people didn’t find this interesting.  But you thought it was amazing!  You could look in the tank from an underwater view and watch the fish swim around!  How was this not entertaining?!

Chase saw how mesmerized you were and smiled; you were finally relaxing and having fun!  You deserved that after the week you had.

“Chase, look at the fishies!” you whispered, pointing to the multicolored school of fish passing by.

“Did you just say ‘fishies’?”

After a long day of learning about the ocean and its magnificent creatures (and street-vendor hot dogs), you and Chase were finally home.  You plopped down on the couch, kicking off your shoes with a content sigh of happiness.

“Thank you Chase, this was wonderful,” you smiled, leaning up to peck his lips

“You’re welcome baby, I’m glad you had a good time,” he smiled, letting you lean on his shoulder to rest, “by the way, I got you something,”

“Chase, you shouldn’t have!  You’ve done enough already!” you playfully scolded, sitting back up straight

“Nonsense, I wanted to do this for you,” he smiled, getting off the couch to grab the big plastic bag you saw earlier.  He handed it to you, a wide smile on his face as he waited for you to look inside.

You took the large, soft object out of the bag to reveal it as a giant stuffed octopus!  “Aww, Chase!  This is so cute!” you whimpered, hugging the pink plushie to your chest, “I love it!”.

Chase kissed your forehead and sat back down with you.  “You really like it?” he chuckled, wrapping his arms around you.

“It’s perfect!” you exclaimed, laying your head on his lap, “though... “

“Though… what?”

“How can you get me a pink, stuffed octopus and still think it’s fair to poke fun at me for saying ‘fishies’?”

TAGLIST:

@buckyshattergirl  @bitchy-tacos  @paranoid-borderline-insane 

[viollettes]

“Carnations” (Part 1)

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader (College AU)

Summary: A carnation fundraiser, an iota of possibility, and a longtime secret crush on your hot best friend - what could go wrong?

many thanks to the effervescent @buckyywiththegoodhair for beta-reading! i love you, you colorful tropical fish with scales made of diamonds! x

“Carnations” (Masterlist)

“(Y/N), if you really don’t want to help, you can leave. It’s okay.”

You snap out of your involuntary trance, meeting the peeved eyes of the tall figure in front of you. Your eyelids rapidly close and open before you blankly mutter, “Huh?”

“Since we started setting up, you’ve sighed thirteen times, loudly scuffed your shoe against the floor seven times, and spaced out four times. It doesn’t take a genius to see that you don’t want to do this.”

It takes a lot to annoy actual angel Steve Rogers, but somehow you’ve accomplished just that in only five minutes. Sheepish guilt washes over you, and you quickly insist, “I’m so sorry. But I swear I want to help!”

“Are you sure? You look a little preoccupied, and I can also do this myself if something’s –“

“No, no, I want to help. I promise,” you firmly repeat. You furiously tape the banner to the table’s edges as if to show how determined you are to help. “I didn’t mean to be a drama queen and space out.” 

Steve tiredly rubs his palm against his face. “Is everything okay?” he asks. The concern in his voice makes the guilt expand in your lungs, compelling you to cast your eyes downwards.

When faced with a small deficit in the Student Government budget, Steve came up with the carnation sale. Students could order flowers –red for love, pink for friendship, and white for secret admiration– and cabinet members would deliver them to the recipients’ respective dorms.

When Steve ran this idea by you, you played your usual role of pessimist by pointing out no one would cough up money to send a carnation without the pressure that comes from holidays or significant others running high on anticipation. You weren’t surprised to hear that unlike you, the Student Government loved Steve’s idea and approved it right away.

Who could say no to Steve Rogers? There was a reason why the boy won the Student Government President seat by a landslide; he practically reeked of optimism and capability. Hell, Steve could suggest that the college should switch their mascot to a piece of rotten kale, and everyone would love the idea.

You regret agreeing to help him set up. Everything about the carnation sale takes you back to the similar flower fundraisers your high school did. Your breath still gets shallow when you recall being the only person in fourth period that didn’t get a flower delivered to them. The sympathetic or amused looks shot your way only heightened the embarrassment and desire to shrivel up into a particle of nothing. It annoys you that it still affects you in college, but what can you do? The heart holds grudges out of fear and trepidation.

So in a way, Steve is responsible for your slight anxiety. Thanks a lot, Steve.

“(Y/N)?”

This is the fifth time you’ve spaced out. Good going, (Y/N). “Sorry, I got distracted by the thought of lunch,” you fib.

“East Dining Hall has shawarma and baos today. Interesting combo, but I’ll eat just about any – Hey! Bucky! Over here!”

Your heart starts to channel its inner Usain Bolt at the sound of the approaching footfalls. The thumping of rushing blood amplifies in your ears, and your brain ricochets around for an exit strategy. Without thinking, you quickly duck under the folding table.

“’Sup, punk? Ah... (Y/N)? Doll? What are you doing underneath the table?”

And that’s when you realize there isn’t a tablecloth to shield you from your crush, who also happens to be your best friend.

Bucky lowers himself onto a knee, ducking his head underneath the table to meet your eyes. The brilliance of his blue eyes is enough to make you want to fan the heat quelling up your face. You offer him a weak smile. “Oh, uh, I thought I saw a quarter on the floor. Gotta save up that money to pay off my loans, ya know?”

Smooth. So smooth.

If the brunette senses your desire to smack your head against the ground, he doesn’t show any sign of it. Instead, Bucky chuckles and outstretches his hand. “Come on, doll,” he lightly encourages.

You take his hand and push yourself off the ground. He slings an arm around your shoulder, the contact enough to get your heart racing again. You wonder if he knows how much of an effect he has on you.

Completely oblivious to your inner emotional turmoil, Bucky asks, “What’s going on? Looks like you’re setting up for something.”

“If you paid attention to what I told you last week, you’d know that Student Gov is holding a carnation sale,” Steve says. He jokingly sends a threatening look at the brunette. “You’re going to contribute by buying one, right?”

Bucky shrugs, the movement jostling you closer to his side. Your face flushes as it grazes his winged lateral muscles – my God, your best friend is fit. It’s physically impossible to combust into flames, but you sidestep out of Bucky’s hold just in case the laws of physics and biology decide to go rogue. An odd look resting on his face, Bucky’s about to say something to you, but Steve’s waiting gaze deters him. “Um, I don’t know? I guess?”

“What do you mean ‘I guess?’ Remember when you said you’d support all of my actions as President? It’s time to walk the talk, jerk. ”

Bucky holds up his hands in mock-surrender. He glances at you for backup, but you’ve busied yourself by arranging the sample carnations while trying to push down your secret feelings for your best friend. Pretending everything was platonic and peachy makes your stomach twist, but you prefer that stress over risking the friendship and losing Bucky in the process.

Yes, you’re a chicken and will probably take this secret to the grave, but it doesn’t stop you from secretly wishing that one day Bucky will realize you two are meant to be.

Hey, a girl can dream.

“I don’t care if you send it to a buddy as a joke. Just support the cause, man. Hell, I might send a few flowers as a prank.” Much to your amusement, Steve starts to ramble about the pranks Bucky could pull on his roommate Sam through the flower sale.

“You know what…” Bucky’s warm brown gaze falls onto you. His full lips curve into a smile, catalyzing a mild flutter in your chest. Without breaking eye contact with you, he continues, “I think I’ll buy a carnation or two.”

Holy crap, what if Bucky sends you a carnation?

The thought crosses your mind so suddenly that you nearly knock over a cardboard box. The carnation sale brings up a lot of ugly memories, but at the same time, all you want is for Bucky to return your feelings.

Fear of rejection is powerful enough to keep your secret feelings airtight. But what if this is one of those rom-com situations where magical things result from a random action? What if a carnation is the stimulus that catalyzes a romantic relationship? What if -

“(Y/N)?”

Ah shit, you spaced out again. “Yeah, Steve? Do you need something?”

“I was wondering if you could go to the Student Gov office and bring our cash box, but I can –”

Oh no, you need to get out of here before you do something stupid. “No! I’ll go! Do you need anything else from the office?”

“No, we just need a cash box.”

“Got it. I’ll be back!” You dash off, wishing it were possible to outrun your thoughts. Though you know it most likely won’t happen, the slightest inkling of Bucky buying you a carnation drives you insane.

“(Y/N)! Wait up!”

Fuck. Why did he have to follow?

You slow your sprint into a walk, your heart racing again when Bucky casually flops an arm around your shoulder. You hate how uncomfortable you feel around him. Bucky isn’t just a stupid crush – he’s the person you trust your life with. This is the guy who witnessed all of your victories and growing pains, and vice versa. You know practically every detail of his life and all of his quirks that normally would be a turn-off to girls.

God damn it, you have a crush on the guy who went through a phase of only using “Shrek” quotes to communicate with people.

“Alright doll, talk to me.” Bucky pauses until you turn your head onto his direction. “What’s really on your mind?” You let out a strangled murmur, prompting him to gently knock his shoulder into yours. “(Y/N), I’ve known you for my entire life. I know something’s up just by the look on your face. Let me do my best friend duties by listening and help you in any way possible.”

“Nothing’s bothering – Okay, fine,” you begrudgingly admit, his knowing look wearing you down. “Remember what happened at my high school every Valentine’s Day? The flower sale?”

Understanding flashes onto the brunette’s face. The arm around your shoulder grows protectively tighter and his look of concern grows dark. Although he went to a different high school, Bucky knows how much of a hit your self-esteem took after every Valentine’s Day. Hell, how could he not when he was the one who always found you at the park in muffled tears?

“I know it’s probably going to be different,” you continue. “This is college, and Steve added a flower option for friendship, which my high school didn’t do. But…” You angrily fist the hem of your shirt into a ball. “I hate that I’m still affected by something so dumb.”

“It’s not dumb. The people at your high school were shitheads. How they didn’t understand how amazing and brilliant you are is beyond me,” Bucky ferociously counters. “Any decent person would have sent a shitload of flowers your way. I know I would have!”

The fluttering butterflies are momentarily replaced with a wave of warm appreciation for your best friend. You know he’s saying this to make you feel better, but it still succeeds in making you feel better. “Thanks, Bucky,” you noncommittally shrug.

Bucky abruptly halts in his tracks and grabs the sides of your arms, whirling you around so you face him directly. “You really don’t get it, do you?”

“What?”

“(Y/N), you...” A sigh escapes his lips in a defeated manner. “If only you could see what I see.”

Words like this ignite the candle of hope in your heart that you have burning for Bucky. Maybe you’ve watched too many rom-com movies, but words like this have a heavier purpose than simply lifting one’s mood.

“Thanks, Buck. That really means a lot to me.”

“Hey,” he grins. “I’ve always got your back. You’re my best friend,” he emphasizes.

And like that, a cold gust blows out the candle of hope, and your shoulders fall with a slump. Of course, he only sees you as a friend. You’re just idiotic enough to jump on a morsel of hope and create an entire fantasy from it.

It bothers you how hurt you feel by this revelation, so you do what you do best – suppress all of the feelings bubbling up your body. You vow to stop being a lovesick puppy and move on from your feelings for Bucky. If it wasn’t going to happen, why bother waste time and dwell?

So imagine your unfiltered surprise when in a week or so, you receive a delivery of a dozen white carnations with a letter “B” signed on the card.

Part 2

@buckyywiththegoodhair @bovaria @abovethesmokestacks @sebbytrash @brighterlights @beccaanne814-blog @jurassicbarnes @avengerofyourheart @cleanslates @corruptedlungsandblackwings @fandomlifeuniverse @themcuhasruinedme @hellomissmabel @pleasecallmecaptain @captainpunk @sebstanwassup @latenightbooknerd @debzybrazy @cami23593 @mynamespaigex @redgillan @alivingfanlady @queen--valeskaxx @softcorehippos @feelmyroarrrr @elyza-jeanette @addictionmarvel @piratecaptain-ducky @taylorjacksonandtheolympians @netflixa @latenitetacos @ideallywinter

[littleforestfairy]

Every aesthetic ask :3c

God damn it Shay

flower crown: when did you last sing to yourself?

Yesterday when I was singing a Seventeen song stuck in my head

fairy lights: if a crystal ball could tell you the truth about anything, what would you want to know?

Will I ever meet all of my friends in person???

daisies: what is the greatest accomplishment of your life?

Uuuhhh I’m not really sure?? I can’t really think of any big accomplishments I’ve made yet

1975: what is the first happy memory that comes to mind, recent or otherwise?

Laughing so freaking hard at a ridiculous clip from a Seventeen concert

matte: if you knew that in one year you would die suddenly, would you change anything about the way you are now living?

I guess I would work harder to finish things, put something amazing out into the world to be remembered by

black nail polish: do you have a bucket list? if so, what are the top three things?

1. Become a well known author

2. Meet all my friends in person

3. Go to Japan

pantone: describe a person close to your life in detail.

I’ll do my sister cus I was just talking to her:

She’s incredibly talented at things like knitting and sewing and playing the piano, but it’s sad how much she underestimates her talents because she’s so impatient and wants to already be at a certain level and convinces herself she should be there already with how long she’s been doing it. Her natural personality is pure sarcasm and sass, teasing and poking fun and pointing out dumb questions with sarcastic answers, she has almost no filter, saying what’s on her mind even if it’s probably not the best time to say it, and sometimes she doesn’t even realize she’s doing it because it’s like her default setting. She’s got a hot head sometimes and has a tendency to get easily angered over small things, building up on top of other small things until it’s a big thing she can’t take anymore. She’s also very caring. She’s the oldest and, even though I don’t want her to do it, she has always put others before herself, ensuring that my brother and I were always comforted and taken care of first even when she felt like breaking down. With that she bottles up her emotions too much, convinces herself that her well-being doesn’t need to come first when it comes to my safety. Though I know she’s trying hard to snap out of that mentality, it’s just hard. She can get very excited over the things she loves, not exactly outwardly jumpy or bubbly, but more excited and frustrated rambling for an hour after she’s binged an entire show in 2 days.

I’m gonna stop there cus it’s so long already

moodboard: do you feel you had a happy childhood?

Yeah, I did!! I have loving parents who always did what they could to ensure we were happy, and siblings close in age (well, one being a twin), so we were able to grow up together and never any distance cus of age or anything

stars: when did you last cry in front of another person?

Like last week

plants: pick a person to stargaze with you and explain why you picked them.

Hmmm I pick my lovely friend Mark because I know he loves space and stars and I think he’d really enjoy just hanging out and stargazing

converse: would you ever have a deep conversation with a stranger and open up to them?

Nooooo, I could never ever do that

lace: when was your last 3am conversation with someone, and who were they to you?

A few days ago with Yams!! We were talking about kpop !!

handwriting: if you were about to die, and you could only say one more sentence to one person, what would you say and to whom?

Uuuuhhhhh I have no idea honestly, that’s too much pressure

cactus: what is your opinion on brown eyes?

They’re very nice! And very underappreciated! My sister and dad have very dark brown eyes that they look almost black and they’re super cool

sunrise: pick a quote and describe what it means to you personally.

"When someone leaves your life, those exits are not made equal. Some are beautiful and poetic and satisfying. Others are abrupt and unfair. But most are just unremarkable, unintentional, clumsy." - Griffin McElroy

It was in the last episode of The Stolen Century and it just really resonates with me personally because it is very very true

oil paints: what would you title the autobiography of your life so far?

“I Never Get Anything Done and It’s a Surprise This Got Done”

overalls: what would you do with one billion dollars?

buy a huge house, buy my parents and my sister their dream cars, go meet up with all my friends, go on a huge vacation with my family to Japan or Germany, or both

combat boots: are you a very forgiving person? do you like being this way?

I try to be, I try to give everyone the benefit of the doubt. I do like trying to see good in people and find out if they really meant something hurtful. I don’t forgive people who refuse to be sorry though or really hurt me, that’s just too much to ask

winged eyeliner: write a hundred word letter to your twelve year old self.

In a year, you're gonna go through the worst tragedy of your whole life, it's gonna make everything feel like the world is falling apart, but I promise you'll be okay in time, it gets easier and you'll have your family to be beside you. And in a few years, you're gonna meet the bestest friends you've ever had who will become like a second family, and that entire summer when you meet them will be the best summer of your whole life, because you'll spend every day and every night laughing with them and it'll be so freaking amazing.

pastel: would you describe yourself as more punk or pastel?

Definitely pastel!

tattoos: how do you feel about tattoos and piercings? explain.

They’re super cool and while I personally don’t want any tattoos and I have no idea when I’ll even pierce my ears, people should be allowed to do whatever they want to their own bodies, they’re great ways of expressing yourself and showing to the world who you are and what’s important to you and what you love.

piercings: do you wear a lot of makeup? why/why not?

Nope, just not really my thing.

bands: talk about a song/band/lyric that has affected your life in some way.

iiiii dunno, nothing really comes to my mind at the moment

messy bun: the world is listening. pick one sentence you would tell them.

“Why are you listening to me, that’s creepy”

cry baby: list the concerts you have been to and talk about how they make you feel.

I’ve been to no concerts!! Except Cheetah Girls when I was like 9 or 10 or something!

grunge: who in the world would you most like to receive a letter from and what would you want it to say?

I dunno honestly

space: do you have a desk/workspace and how is it organised/not organised?

I do have a desk but I don’t use it rn cus I don’t have a chair. It’s an art desk so my paint and stuff is mostly organized, though there is a bit of a mess that I’ll move whenever I get a chair

white bed sheets: what is your night time routine?

Brush my teeth, get a bottle of water, watch videos until I get sleepy

old books: what’s one thing you don’t want your parents to know?

Uuuhhhhh that I read smut fanfics a LOT 

beaches: if you had to dye your hair how would you dye/style it and why?

I would dye it cotton candy pink because it’s a freaking super cute color, but it would require bleaching for my hair and I don’t want that

eyes: pick five people to go on an excursion with you. who would you pick and where would you go/what would you do?

I don’t wanna pick just five I wanna pick all my friends and we’ll all go on a road trip and hit all the touristy spots

11:11: name three wishes and why you wish for them.

I actually do make wishes when it’s 11:11, but tbh I don’t wanna say anything I do or would wish for, cus you’re not supposed to say wishes or they won’t come true ! 

painting: what is the best halloween costume you have ever put together? if none, make one up.

I didn’t put it together, but my grandma did, and it was a green, white, and pink fairy dress with sheer fabric over it and little flowers on the sheer and it was big on me but it was super cute

lightning: what’s the worst thing you’ve ever done while drunk or high?

I’ve never been drunk or high !

thunder: what’s one thing you would never do for one million dollars?

Kill someone

storms: you on only listen to one song for the rest of your life, or only see one person for the rest of your life. which and why?

Only listen to one song. Because I’ve got too many people important to me and I don’t wanna see just ONE of them for the rest of my life

love: have you ever fallen in love? describe what it feels like to realise you’re in love.

Noooope

clouds: if you’re a boy, would you ever rock black nail polish? if you’re a girl, would you ever rock really really short hair?

I’ve had short hair before and I didn’t like it, I much much prefer long hair

coffee: what’s your starbucks order, and who would you trust to order for you, if anyone?

Usually it’s just strawberries and creme frappucino, which is. just a menu item so I would trust anyone to order it. But when we have the money, I get a banana chocolate chip frappucino and it’s not really that complicated, so I’m sure anyone could order it

marble: what is the most important thing to you in your life right now?

My friends and family !!

[nonbinarybaby]

What was your first heartbreak like? What happened to you/what did they do?

Oh boy. That is a very long, and involved story, but I’ll try and explain the gist of it. I’ll put it under the cut here, just in case nobody wants to read it, but I guess if you want to, click on down ‘ere.

Surprisingly, my first heartbreak wasn’t my first love- she never really broke my heart, only wounded it- but in the end, she and I are still good friends, even today. 

No, my first heartbreak was with my first love who was a Male. I’m not gonna say his real name for Privacy purposes, but lets just call him Vincent. 

So, Vincent was 19 years old and in grade 12 (i can’t remember why he didn’t graduate on time/may have skipped out a year and came back) and I was 15 years old, and in grade 10. 

It was my first year of choir (I got into both of the audition-only choirs, but there was a non-audition, and as part of the credit you had to go to all of it, which was fine with me cause i loved it, but yeah) This choir was the non-auditioned choir, Meistersingers. Anybody could join, and it was a cool way to meet people, sing, and you got a school credit for it- plus all the fun trips and concerts and all that.

So, Vincent is in Meistersingers. But he was a huge loner. I never paid much attention to people around me, but I heard stories about him- not so much *about* him, but just girls gawking at how he was so hot and mysterious (kinda emo-punk) and they were too scared to talk to him because of how attractive and gloomy he seemed to be. 

 One day he was sitting alone against the wall, and I was talking to a friend, and I overheard this same conversation I’d heard SO MANY TIMES. And I was like

Y’know what? Enough. ENOUGHHHH.

So I marched over to him, with everyone in the vicinity watching in silence (because they thought it was so horrifying I was ACTUALLY going to talk to him.) And I stand right in front of him. He looks up at me, and I point at his socks (fuzzy, mismatched pink and green ones) and I point at mine (coincidentally, also fuzzy and mismatched at the time) and I smile and say “We have matching socks, and therefore, are now best friends. Now High-five me!”

 I held my hand in the air for like, 5 seconds before he BURSTS into laughter, giving me a high five, shaking his head while smiling up at me. He thanked me for the laugh and I asked his name, which he told me, and I said mine was Kate- He said “I know.” And I smiled and left.

After that day, he smiled at me and would make small conversation with me in Choir. We started hanging out during that time quite a lot. Eventually, i realized I was getting a crush on him- but, alas, he had a girlfriend. Woe is 15-year-old me. 

 But, he asked me to go with him for coffee after class one day- which was fine, since I had to wait for my mom to drive me home every day (I’m scared of schoolbusses- that’s a story for another day) So we go to a coffee shop and he’s talking with me.

 Basically Vincent tells me that he’s been feeling like, emotionally distraught because of his relationship. Apparently his girlfriend hadn’t been treating him well and making him feel pretty shitty, and then I came along and like made everything better. At this point my head is swirling because I had really low self esteem (was also still extremely depressed and an addict back then) and so this was like- what? wow. Me? Are you sure?

 He looked like he was going to hold my hand and decided against it but just told me that he was thankful I was around. 

 So, Cue hanging out more for another week and a half. Then he texts me and asks him to come see him on my break (I worked at a fast food place just a 4 minute walk from where he worked.) So I book over there, and He walks around the counter and just hands me his phone. I looked at it- he and his girlfriend broke up. And he just hugs me. I can tell he’s clearly upset, but i felt kind of relieved that I was the person he reached out to first things first. 

 So, I asked him the next day if he wanted to talk about it because I genuinely wanted him to be okay, but he said it was all good.

 We keep hanging out more and more, and it’s clear flirting is involved at this point. Eventually, there’s a school dance coming up, and we went together. Had a fun old time- he taught me how to dance. I remember it was one of the happiest nights of my life thus far. I stayed at his house that night, fell asleep cuddling him on his couch. After I fell asleep, he got up at some point and went to his room. (I called my mom before staying there and she was fine with it- she trusted me and my judgements.)

 So we keep talking and he has admitted he feels things for me, and I admit the same. And it also ends up leading to him saying that he felt tempted to try to do some *ahem* ~naughty~ things with me that night I stayed with him. But out of respect, removed himself. 

 Now, I was very insecure. And I am aware- 15 and 19? I should have kept it together more. But, I was afraid of him leaving, and I already didn’t know how to love myself or what it really felt like to be properly loved by someone else. So the next time I stayed over, I let some stuff happen. 

 Things continue on like that- we were always together at school, even holding hands, he had become my best friend, almost- aside from my actual best friend, whose name for the case of this story was Abby. 

 I introduced them both at the dance, actually, and was super happy they got along. We would all hang out together sometimes, and It felt like my life was really turning around. But the only shitty thing- I wasn’t officially dating Vincent. He never asked me out, And i was too afraid to ask. 

 Cue in this trip to a big city (like a long ass charter bus ride) for a choir competition/trip! It was super overwhelming because I spent so much time bonding with Vincent on our free time, It was also my first solo in a performance and it was a freestyle so I was geekin’- and I got good reviews! So we had to leave and head back home right after our performance (the one with my solo), So i’m already on an emotional high, because I did it and I nailed it! Go me!

 I get back to the busses (3 busses, the guys  were changing on one, girls on another, and then met up between) and I change , and my friend (lets call her Avera) Smiles and hugs me, shouting congratulations. And i was like “Thanks, I know, I can’t believe I actually did the solo well-” And she looks at me funny like “No, that isn’t what I meant..” So, I ask, naturally because what else could it be?

 And then she says “Vincent told me you guys are dating!”

 And I just freeze and im like….. well what in the fresh flying fuck is this

LIke that’s news??? to meeee?????????? wot

so, i change and go to the bus where everyone’s meeting. And sit down next to vincent, who congratulates me on my solo. And I shyly blurt out, “Am I your girlfriend?”

 And he just smiles slowly and says “Do you want to be?” And i Just nod, and then he says “well then, yeah.” 

 So, I hug him, and things seem all well and good.

 Until a week later, when my brother told my parents there was a rumour we were having sex (which wasn’t entirely true?? we fooled around but we didn’t have full penetrative sex because I was too scared to (-:) So my parents were threatening to call the cops and all this other shit. 

 And so, ha ha ha, after all this time of waiting- Vincent broke up with me. 

 Yepppppp. It sucked. 

 But, confusing ass thing- He still insisted on hanging out with me constantly and being around me. 

 So things go back to the way they were. Fooling around, being together, kissing, hugging, being so emotionally, mentally, and physically intimate- just not offically dating. 

 And that goes on for a couple more months. 

 But then one day he just basically tells me to get out of his house. And that he doesn’t want to speak to me anymore. 

 And the next day at school, he’s got his arm looped around this girl who is super fucking thin (I was too, but she was like mega-thin) So I wondered if it was because I was too fat. Too young. Too depressed. Too annoying. Too dumb. Too anything. Too me. 

 Thus, I go spiralling back into a severe pit of depression- worse than before I had met him. My addiction worsened, my blackouts worsened, my mental state completely depleted. 

 A month later, I heard he and this girl had broken up, but apparently he was still seeing someone. I didn’t want to hear anything about it. All i knew was I wanted to see my best friend, Abby- Desperately so. I needed someone. I could feel my pain and emotions building up like a volcano, just on the cusp of erupting, but she was constantly busy, and always had an excuse not to see me. I brushed it off cause I knew her mom wasn’t the healthiest- chalked it up to her being busy helping her. 

 But one day I hit a point where I knew I was on the brink. I really felt like I was going to seriously harm myself, and I wanted to. I fucking wanted to. But I still had a shred of hope, a part of me that screamed to talk to someone. 

 I called Abby 5 times. No answer. I texted her desperately. I pulled my hair and waited 5 more minutes, just hoping- and then my phone buzzed. And I got a text that read essentially, this-

 “Kate, I’m sorry, but I have to tell you the truth- I can’t keep it from you anymore. The reason I’ve been avoiding you, is that Vincent and I are dating now. I know that it’s shitty of me, but I care about him too much to let him slip by. I hope you’ll forgive me somehow.”

 I stared at my phone for 20 minutes, barely breathing. I didn’t even realize when I started crying my eyes out. I replied something along the lines of “I hope you rot in hell, and that you always regret choosing the guy who broke me over your best-fucking-friend, because he will never replace what I was to you.” (sidenote: not even 6 months later they broke up, and a year later she apologized to me desperately. I forgave her, even though it still hurt, but i’m over it now.) At the time of this happening, though- this was it. this was the explosion. 

 I don’t even really clearly remember what I did. I just know I ended up in the hospital for a bit. I won’t go into gory details, because that isn’t necessary. All you need to know is I had more therapy to go to, and I had to quit my job because I was too depressed to work at the time. I spent that summer basically just hiding from the world in my house, wondering why happiness wasn’t something I could have. 

 though at some point I was dragged out by friends to go hang out with some people- went to a hangout in my hometown for teens- and met this dude. I felt like I liked him, and soon enough we were dating. At my birthday party in the summer at my farm, me and friends and this guy were all there- and I get a text on my cell. 

 And it’s from Vincent. And it says - “I’m sorry. Happy birthday.”

 And that’s when I realized I didn’t even care about this guy who was with me. I waited two days and i broke up with him. I didn’t realize until then that He was a rebound (I didn’t know what that was lmao)

 But yeah so that text just made me super depressed again

 It took me until about the end of my grade 12 year to be completely over him. and even a little bit more than that, because at random times I would get really emotionally sick over how distraught what happened made me. And what I did to myself over it. (Shortly after Thomas and I started dating, we ran into him, and I bolted and Thomas couldn’t find me for a while. This was only about a month or two into dating, And I was still recovering mentally since I’d only been clean from my addiction for a couple months, so I was pretty raw. He was understanding, thankfully.) 

 So, it took me almost 2 and a half years to recover from the mental trauma I experienced from my first heartbreak. 

 I was trying to explain the gist, but there is no “gist” lmao. I can’t explain what happened without EXPLAINING what happened. Sorry bout it. 

 But well, yeah. So. That’s what happened. *Shrug* I’m over it now. I was 15 when it happened, and I turn 22 years old this July. 

 If anything, I hope this story didn’t make you sad. I hope it actually made you happy, somehow. Why, you may ask? 

 When I was 15, and crying and banging my fists on my thighs, wondering why I wasn’t good enough- I felt I would never be able to escape the horrid, all-encompassing pain I felt at that time. I felt I would be washed up in it forever, and never be able to leave it behind. 

 But now, I rarely think about it at all. The only time I do, is when I look deeply at my half-sleeve tattoo, or run my fingers along the scars that are now buried under something much more beautiful. I’ve come a long way, and grown into somebody that I definitely was not all those years ago. I’m happy now, and I love myself, and my life. And I actually am happy with those memories now, because I actually learned a lot about love, and myself, and how to deal with pain from it. 

 So, if you ever are feeling like you’ll never get past something, or it hurts too much- Sometimes it can take years- but you can do it. 

 It’ll all be okay.

 Someday. (: 

If you read this far, good for you. Here’s some free lovins’ as a gift ໒( ♥ ◡ ♥ )७ (ฅ⁍̴̀◊⁍̴́)و ̑̑

[basically-i-write-shit]

Taking flight

Part 1 of 3  of my gift exchange gift for @tsukyamgiftexchange for @enterprisecaptainoikawa, who requested “aromantic/asexual spectrum tsukkiyama, punk tsukkiyama, band au, ice skating/yuri on ice au ahhh, professor/bibliophile au, tsukkiyama as best friends, really anything tbh bless”! I didn’t know if She meant band au as in orchestra or singing/etc. band, so if not there’s also an orchestra! Here’s the Band au: 

People always ask Tadashi about how the band stays together; he wonders why they only ask him (and he knows that they only ask him). Sure, Tsukishima and Kageyama are scary and Shouyou is always hopping from one place to another, too busy to sit down, but…Tadashi’s nothing special. He’s plain. Besides– Tadashi hasn’t been around long enough to know himself. 

Tsukishima and Kageyama are constantly bickering; if it’s not Tsukishima and Kageyama, it’s Tsukishima and Hinata, or Kageyama and Hinata. The three are an odd group, and no matter how many times Tadashi plays peacekeeper, they still argue. 

Looking back, Tadashi wonders how much trouble he’s really gotten himself into by joining Take Flight. 

“Oi. Are you even paying attention?” 

Tadashi’s eyes fall nervously on Kageyama, only to find the dark haired bassist wasn’t even talking to him but instead a dazed-looking Shouyou. 

“You’ve missed your cue like ten times. I’m getting tired of playing the same riff over and over again. Get your head straight!” 

Tsukishima, pianist, snickers at this, and Kageyama and Hinata glare at him. 

“What’re you laughing at?!” Hinata all but yells into his mic, causing Tadashi to cringe and wave apologetically to the poor man in the sound booth. 

“Nothing, nothing. It’s just that, Kageyama said to get your head straight, but I’m ninety percent sure that he’s the only straight one here.” 

Cheeks tinging red, Tadashi decides to break it up before the yelling inevitably starts. 

“Guys, we really should get out work done. Us taking forever to record this track isn’t just affecting us…” Tadashi nods to the man in the booth, and the group of people at the editing table behind him. “Shouyou, I’ll nod to you when you need to come in. I should have before, I’m sorry.” 

“Oh, Yama-chan, you’re the best!” Shouyou flings himself at Tadashi, causing him to tumble and almost drop his electric guitar. “Let’s get to work!” 

Recording is done soon enough, to Tadashi’s guilty delight, and he finds himself walking home from the studio where they’re recording their ep, Tsukishima Kei next to him. One hand is warm in his pocket and the other freezes in the cold of the winter weather; his guitar case dangles between popsicle fingers, and he finds his pace is slower than normal, despite the voice in the back of his head telling him to get home faster. Tsukishima, trailing behind him, listens to music quietly, and Tadashi thinks about how he met the pianist and got mixed in with all of this band stuff. 

“Thank you all, uh– have a great night! I love you guys, you’re the best!” 

People clap, and Tadashi – flushed pink – makes his way back behind the counter as Just a little Suga, the local coffee shop he works at. Open mic night has always been his favorite night. Sugawara, his manager, smiles at him, and hands him his apron. He’s just tying it around his waist when a redhead bounds up to him, pulling a (devastatingly beautiful) blond by the wrist. 

“Hey! Freckles! Who just sang up there! We’re in a band!” 

“A- Ah, really?..” Tadashi furrows his brows, not knowing how that applies to him. “Uh…–” 

“We want you to join it! I need a backup singer-slash-someone to duet with! And your voice is soooo pretty!” The redhead is so loud, every eye in the cafe is on him now, and it’s somehow more terrifying than singing in front of them. 

Not to mention the blond with him is so beautiful and he looks so uninterested and god, Tadashi is weak–

“Ok.” 

“Great! Here’s my number, I’ll text you!” 

Frick. 

That was a year ago. 

“Would you like to hang out, Tsukki?..” It’s a long shot– Tsukishima’s always been closed off. During rehearsals, Tsukishima grew close to Tadashi, but even then, they weren’t the best. 

“Ah. You still want to, after that comment outing you to the entire band and crew?” 

“Huh? Oh. I’m pretty open with my sexuality, so I don’t mind. Besides, I know you can’t go without making a joke at Tobio-kun’s expense.” Tadashi smiles, and shifts his guitar case, cringing when his cold fingers crack and stretch. He’s smiling at Tsukishima’s grunt in response when something suddenly hits him. “…Wait. You said Tobio was ‘the only straight one’ in the band…I didn’t know you weren’t straight…” 

“Ah. I suppose you weren’t there when I came out…” Tsukishima rubs his neck, clearly nervous, and the flustered expression on his face is something new to Tadashi. “I’m, uh… Well, I’m uh– asexual. I don’t–” 

“–feel sexual attraction. I know, silly. I’m on the spectrum.” 

“Oh.” Tsukishima frowns. “I– I thought you…” 

“I’m demi.” 

“Ah. I see.” 

“So,” Tadashi raises his voice slightly to change the topic. “How about it? Hang out?” 

Tsukishima nods, slowly, and smiles softly. “…Sure. Alright.” 

Tadashi grins. “Great!” 

Hanging out with Tsukishima is always fun. The two usually just sit around in one of their apartments together and watch Netflix, maybe drink, but it always makes Tadashi happy. Today is Tadashi’s turn to bring Tsukishima to his apartment, and when he unlocks his front door, he’s lucky his roommate is out. Noya is sweet, but he…overwhelms Tsukishima. 

Setting his guitar case down to slide off his coat, Tadashi shudders at the change of temperature. The hand that was gripping his guitar case burns with heat, and Tadashi mentally curses himself for not wearing gloves when he knew it was cold out today. 

“Do you want a drink? I think I have some beer in the fridge.” 

“No, not tonight.” Tsukishima straightens from sliding off his own shoes and Tadashi is suddenly reminded of how tall the blond is. “Can we make coffee, though? I’m freezing.” 

“So the human heater is cold? It must be cold,” Tadashi chuckles at Tsukishima’s grumble in response; he’s always joked about Tsukishima being the human equivalent of a volcano. “I’ll make coffee, but Noya-san probably used the last of the creamer, with his habits.” 

“Habits,” Tsukishima scoffs. “He drinks creamer with a dash of coffee. Literally. I’ve seen him make it.” 

“Try living with him!” Tadashi laughs, lifts his guitar up once more to drop it in the living room where the majority of his and Noya’s instruments and equipment lay. He leads Tsukishima to the kitchen, and smiles softly when Tsukishima plops down on a chair in the dining room with a heavy sigh. 

Tadashi shifts the coffee maker into the ‘on’ position and starts making the coffee; he notices for the first time how lucky he is that Tsukishima takes his coffee the same way as he does. Black (Tsukishima jokes that he likes it as dark as his soul) coffee has always been the best to him. Besides– if they were to use all of the sugar and creamer, Noya would be a walking zombie if they did. 

“How’s your mom?” 

“Good,” Tadashi smiles at Tsukishima as he settles down as well to wait for the coffee. “She just got out of the hospital last week, I think she’ll be back to normal in a few days.” 

“That’s good. Any changes in her condition?” 

Tadashi can tell the old med-school student in Tsukishima is interested, but he can also tell Tsukishima is genuinely concerned. His heart warms. 

“The tumor is shrinking, but not by much…the pneumonia really set her healing process back a bit.” 

“I see…” Tsukishima hums. “Well, I’ve only known her for a while, but she’s strong. She’ll get better.” 

“Yeah.” 

The coffee maker beeps signalling it’s finished making the coffee, and Tadashi jumps up, grabbing mugs and pouring their coffee. Tsukishima takes his thankfully, and immediately downs half of it. Tadashi just watches, smiling, as he takes a sip of his own. One thing he’s never understood about Tsukishima was how he could drink his coffee straight out of the coffee maker, boiling hot. 

“How are Akiteru and Saeko?” 

“Alright. I think Aki-nii is more nervous for the wedding than Saeko, when usually it’s the bride.” 

Tadashi chuckles, and shakes his head. “I’ve gotten an invitation already, so at least he’s not paralyzed with nerves…” 

“You have?” Tsukishima raises an eyebrow. “He knows your address?” 

“A- Ah, he, uh…added me on Facebook back when we first met?..And we got talking, and I guess…He got my address somehow?..” Tadashi doesn’t want to question it– he’s just happy he got an invitation in the first place. “I don’t know…” 

“Well, are you going, then?” 

“Yeah, of course! I mean, I’ve never personally met Akiteru-kun, but I still want to congratulate him on his marriage!” 

Kei’s cheeks tinge pink for some reason, and Tadashi is reminded of how aesthetically pleasing the blond is; with his long limbs, golden eyes, and the soft halo of yellow curls on his head. Tadashi would like to see him with winged eyeliner and maybe a nice pair of high waisted pants. Tsukishima has nice hips, and with his long legs…Tadashi would have to place a special order….

“Oi. You listening?” 

“Huh? Oh, sorry, Tsukki! Just thinking! What?” Tadashi’s own cheeks heat up, and he bites his lip. 

“I asked if you would like to be my plus one. I know you have your own invitation, but I don’t want my family asking if I’m dating…If I have a plus one, then they’ll assume I am. Either way, you’re going to the wedding, so I figured…” 

“Sure! I’d love to!” Tadashi interrupts before Tsukishima can talk himself out of the invitation. “But aren’t you the best man?” 

“Ah, Saeko doesn’t want to stick to tradition at their wedding, so Akiteru will have a best woman, and Saeko will have a bridesman. It’s…odd, but refreshing. I’m just glad I won’t be in the wedding.” Tsukishima looks happy, talking about the wedding.. Tadashi can see he really doesn’t care he wasn’t included in the wedding party. “Besides. Aki-nii says my resting bitch face would scare the poor people who made their way out to see the wedding.” 

Tadashi can’t help it. He doesn’t want to, because he doesn’t want to make Tsukishima upset, but he laughs. Hard. So hard, in fact, tears spring in his eyes and he’s doubling over the table before he can stop himself. When he straightens up he expects to see Tsukishima’s pace pulled into a frown, but to his utter surprise, there’s a soft smile on the blond’s lips. 

“He’s right, isn’t he?” Tsukishima says, chuckling to himself, and Tadashi watches him with wide eyes. Tsukishima Kei is smiling and laughing at his own expense. 

A few more coffees later, Tadashi and Tsukishima are on the couch in the living room, Tsukishima falling asleep on Tadashi’s shoulder. A documentary plays in the background, but Tadashi is too focused on the light illuminating Tsukishima’s features. Looking at his friend, he can’t help but think how lucky he got in life. 

He’s really starting to take flight; he’s glad Tsukishima is there to fly with him. 

[purplesurveys]

371

Doing another one of those looking back surveys ‘cos it’s fun to do that sort of thing as a way to cap off the year. This is one of the first surveys I took, all the way back in 2012. Let’s gooooo. [Edit: I wasn’t able to finish this by the end of the year, so I guess I’m opening this year instead with a throwback hahaha]

Do you usually sleep with your closet door open or closed? Closed. I’m pretty OC, so if I leave them opened I’d only end up irritated. Now: Closed. Why the hell would I leave my closet open?

Do you take the shampoos and conditioner bottles from hotels? My mom does. Now: Dear 14 year old Robyn, I don’t know what you were observing but your mom definitely never took anything from the hotel??? But to answer the question, no I don’t. The most I’d take is probably a notepad. Have you ever ‘done it’ in a hotel room? No. Now: Six years later, yep.

Where is your next vacation? My family haven’t decided yet! Now: We’re flying over to somewhere in Bicol a couple of months from now.

Have you ever stolen a street sign before? Nope. Now: No, that’ll never serve me any sort of purpose lmfao.

Who do you think reads these? Meh, no one. Now: Surprisingly, both my old survey blog and this one have earned its share of followers, so I guess at some points my surveys are being read. I say ‘surprisingly’ because both blogs were just meant to be a feelings dump for myself, and I never expected anyone to read my posts. 

Do you have a calendar in your room? Like, one that’s hanging on wall? No. Now: Nope. I have one on my phone, which is more convenient. 

Where are you? I’m in my house. On a bed. In my room. Now: ^ Literally the same answer. I guess little has changed when it comes to this.

What’s your plan for the day? Finish Romeo and Juliet and start on that Friar Lawrence essay. Now: Hahahaha freshman year. Well it’s New Year’s Eve, so my crazed mom is gonna take us to church to idk I guess ~commemorate the end of the year because apparently god still has to be involved in that. We normally celebrate NYE at home since our rooftop has the best view of the fireworks, so I’m guessing we’ll have media noche and then wait for the clock to strike midnight.

Are you reading any books right now? Yeah. Romeo and Juliet. Now: I’m reading Bret Hart’s Hitman: My Real Life in the Cartoon World of Wrestling. I’m also reading AJ Lee/Mendez’s (I never know what to call her anymore) Crazy is My Superpower, and sometimes I’ll skim through Chris Jericho’s The Best in the World: At What I Have No Idea because Jericho’s always a good read. Obviously, wrestling autobiographies are my thing.

Do you ever count your steps when you walk? Occasionally. Now: I literally never counted my steps. What the hell was young Robyn so loud for?

Have you ever peed in the woods? No. Now: Nope.

Do you ever dance even if there’s no music playing? Yes…maybe it’s why I have no friends? Now: ^ Stop trying to sound cool, you hate dancing with every atom in your body. I don’t dance, even if there is music playing; but the grand exception to this is when I danced my soul out at my Paramore show last August. I’d be crazy not to have.

Do you chew your pens and pencils? Uh. Yuck. Now: Never did. I liked chewing on my lollipop sticks though.

What is your “Song of the Week”? Night On Earth - The Bouncing Souls Now: Haven’t listened to a lot for this depression break, but let’s go with Paramore’s Franklin. Night on Earth is a fucking banger though.

Is it okay for guys to wear pink? Of course. Now: Of course.

Do you still watch cartoons? You bet I do. Never letting the kid in me go. Now: If I catch a rerun of Spongebob then yeah. But I generally still agree with the answer I gave. We Bare Bears is a favorite.

Whats your favorite love movie? Titanic, Love Actually, Friends With Benefits. Now: The Proposal, Love Actually...do Revolutionary Road and Eternal Sunshine count?

What do you drink with dinner? I drink water most of the time. Now: Water’s still my bet.

What do you dip Chicken Nuggets in? Barbecue sauce. Now: Whatever’s available, but barbecue seems to be the default dip.

What is your favorite food/cuisine? I enjoy pizza and fried chicken. Now: Indian food for days. Also sushi. I’m not much of a pizza person anymore; I’d get it while on a date with Gab but my heart belongs to sushi this time around.

What movies could you watch over and over and still love? Titanic! Now: Yeah...Titanic’s still That Bitch. But also Ferris Bueller’s Day Off! That’s a fun movie to see if I just want to spend a fun two hours watching something.

Last person you hugged/kissed? Last one I hugged was Gabie; I’ve never kissed anyone. Now: My five-year-old cousin went in for a hug when I came over to see her the other night. My girlfriend was my last kiss.

Were you ever a boy/girl scout? Nope. Now: Never been.

Would you ever strip or pose nude in a magazine? Never. Now: Never.

When was the last time you wrote a letter to someone on paper? Last month during my class’s recollection. Now: One of my friend groups did a secret Santa, but we also required everyone to write a letter alongside our gift/s. That said, I wrote a reeeeally long, handwritten letter to Laurice, who I happen to have grown close to this year.

Can you change the oil on a car? No. Now: Nah. I leave that to my dad.

Ever gotten a speeding ticket? No; I can’t even drive yet. Now: I dunno if the Philippines actually has a speeding rule? People here drive like death when the roads are miraculously clear (they never are except for Sundays and holidays) because it’s bumper-to-bumper traffic in the city 24/7, but they’re never pulled over. There are speeding rules on the expressways but people don’t seem to mind that as well, so I doubt getting pulled over for speeding is actually a thing here.

Run out of gas? Nope. Now: No that’s like one of my biggest fears. What happens when your car runs out of gas? I imagine it to be like that scene in Toy Story where Buzz and Woody are trying to chase the moving truck, so they use RC to move faster, but then his battery dies and he just kind of slows down lmao.

Favorite kind of sandwich? Chicken/gourmet. Now: Sandwiches aren’t my go-to so I don’t really have a favorite. I don’t know what I was talking about when I meant ~gourmet sandwich, what a feeler haha.

Best thing to eat for breakfast? BACON. Now: I like eating waffles with bacon inside. Omelettes with everything put in is great too, and so are scrambled eggs.

What is your usual bedtime? On school nights, 9 PM. On Friday nights it ranges from 10 to 12. When I’m on summer vacation I don’t sleep at all. Now: Yeah, I pretty much still sleep at 9 at the earliest on school nights. A bitch needs to function the next day. On Fridays and weekends I’d sleep at 1 AM at the latest, but that depends because sometimes I’ll have school stuff on a Saturday.

Are you lazy? The laziest. Now: I have my periods but when I do work I bust my ass off.

When you were a kid, what did you dress up as for Halloween? Tinkerbell! Now: Various stuff...I was Tinkerberll, I was a pirate, I dressed up as my former best friend, I was AJ Lee, I was Daria. I’ve had a lot of costumes through the years.

Do you have any magazine subscriptions? Nope. Now: No, I was never subscribed to any. I did buy Total Girl every month when I was like 6 up until I was maybe 11 or 12. It’s an Australian magazine for girls, or, as they liked to call my age group at the time, ~tweens.

Which are better, legos or lincoln logs? LEGO! Grew up playing those. And I’d end up crying after I stepped on them. Now: I was never familiar with Lincoln logs. We had crates of LEGO blocks though.

Are you stubborn? Very. Now: Yep, ‘very’ sums it up nicely.

Who is better…Leno or Letterman? Dunno. Should I give a crap about them? Now: I definitely don’t give a crap about either now...I mostly watch Fallon if I want to see celebrities doing silly gags, cos he does a great job making his show super entertaining.

Ever watch soap operas? Yes, when I want to laugh at horrible acting. Now: 14 year old me didn’t have to be so mean. No, I’ve never been into soap operas.

Afraid of heights? Yes. Now: No, only when I’m in a ride, which is partly why I stopped going to amusement parks altogether.

Sing in the car? Don’t we all? Now: All the time, but only when I’m alone.

Dance in the shower? No. Now: Just really rarely.

Dance in the car? When there’s enough space yes. Now: Literally never. Wtf was I lying so much for??

Ever used a gun? No. Now: Never, but lately I’ve been really interested in the idea of going to a shooting range for funsies.

Do you think musicals are cheesy? No. I think they’re the best. Now: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. What the fuck Robyn!!! You’ve hated musicals ever since and you hate it now. Stop lying and stop trying to sound cool!!!

Is Christmas stressful? Yes. Waiting 25 days to open that awfully tempting, beautifully wrapped present under the Christmas tree is really stressful honestly. Now: Buying gifts is stressful. Receiving gifts and opening them have leveled down on the excitement factor these days. Such is getting old.

Ever eat a pierogi? A what? Now: Nope.

Major annoyance right now? The fact that I have to write an essay about Friar Lawrence from Romeo and Juliet. Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy writing but when you’re forced to write something you’re not really enthusiastic about, it’s just. Not. Fun. Now: I have to go back to school by next week and I just want to be on a much longer break.

Occupations you wanted to be when you were a kid? A fireman. Now: Fireman, astronaut, veterinarian.

Do you believe in ghosts? Yes. Now: I’m always open to the idea.

Ever have a deja-vu feeling? Like once a week. Now: Pretty often, yeah.

Do you take a vitamin daily? No. Hardly do. Now: Nah, not anymore.

Wear slippers? Occasionally. Now: Only when I’m at the beach or a pool.

Wear a bath robe? Yes. Now: Sometimes.

What do you wear to bed? Tank top + shorts. Now: I wear t-shirts more now, but yeah I woul wear tank tops on warmer nights.

Wal-Mart, Target or K-Mart? None of the above. I haven’t entered any of these stores yet, because I live in boring, old Philippines. Now: I don’t care about any of these.

Nike or Adidas? Nike. Now: I like them both and have sneakers from both.

Cheetos Or Fritos? Fritos. Now: Fritos.

Peanuts or Sunflower seeds? Peanuts! Now: Peanuts. I’ve never had sunflower sees.

Ever hear of, “gorp”? Never heard of it. Now: No, I’ve still never heard of it seven years later.

Ever taken karate? No. Would love to! Now: Nah. I think I’m too unathletic to even try.

Ever kissed someone of the same sex? No. Now: Yes.

Can you curl your tongue? Yes. Now: Yep, but only in two. I know some people can curl it even more.

Ever won a spelling bee? Dude, I always get first place. Probably the only thing I’m good at besides writing. Now: Before.

Ever cried because you were so happy? Countless times. Now: I cry more because of wholesome videos or instances that make me happy, but not because something so huge that made me overwhelmingly happy happened to me.

Own any record albums? No. Now: I’d collect them if I actually had a turntable.

Own a record player? I sadly don’t D: Now: See above.

Regularly burn incense? No. The smell is annoying. Now: Yeah I’d still find the smell annoying, but only because it reminds me so much of church.

Ever been in love? Maybe. Now: Yes.

Hot tea or cold tea: Neither. Now: Hate tea.

Tea or coffee? Coffee. Now: Coffee for daaaaaysssss.

Favorite kind of cookie? Burnt chocolate chip cookies. Hnnng. Now: ^ Well...still that...except remove the ‘burnt’ part? Idk what I was thinking but I just enjoy chocolate chip cookies period. Anything with peanut butter is also a yes for me.

Can you swim well? Oh, no. I look like a dying fish when I swim. Now: I know basic stuff, but I know I don’t look good when I do the strokes, especially the backstroke eugh.

Can you hold your breath w/o manually holding your nose? Yes. Now: Sure.

Are you patient? NOPE Now: In some aspects. But I hate waiting in traffic or in lines.

Ever won a contest? Yes. Now: Here and there.

Ever had plastic surgery? Never. Now: Never.

Which are better black or green olives? No idea. Now: Olives are the worst.

Can you knit or crochet? No, which is the reason why I failed Home Economics last year. Now: Home econ was “LAST YEAR” at that point??!!?! That’s absolutely crazy. And no, I still don’t do either. I still wouldn’t even if it were graded.

Wash room or bathroom? Bathroom. Now: I use both.

Do you want to get married? Someday! Now: ‘S all I’m looking forward to.

Who was your High School crush? I’m only in my freshman year, but I’m having this crazy, suicidal infatuation with CM Punk. Now: I wish I could talk to 14 year old Robyn and tell her how delusional she sounded in her first few surveys. This is why Punk blocked you on Twitter sis. Anyway, Gab was my high school crush through and through, but I didn’t start liking her til about halfway through sophomore year.

Do you cry and throw a fit until you get your own way? I don’t, but when I want things to go my way and they don’t, I give everyone the silent treatment and roll my eyes every like, two seconds. Now: No I don’t, I just keep quiet until it fizzles out.

Do you have kids? No. Now: Nope.

Do you want kids? Yes. Now: Yep.

What kind of mom are you? …I’m a mom!? Now: ...Still not a mom.

Do you miss anyone right now? Sure. Now: Always do.

Who do you want to see right now? No one really. Now: My girlfriend.