#I need to make a list of my concerning symptoms now oh my god.

[scientia-rex]

Hi Dr. Kristophine, do you have any advice on what kind of information doctors need for medical issues that are more nebulous than "my knees hurt"? I've been feeling Weird and Bad in a way that has me concerned, but I'm afraid to make an appointment because I don't know what to say that will get the Weird and Bad feeling across in an actionable way. Going to the doctor takes SO much energy that I don't have to waste and I don't want them to just take a blood test and say everything's fine go home (again).

The best thing you can do with medical information you're trying to prepare for your medical provider, as a lay person, is be as specific as possible.

-Location: Is it one place in particular, or everywhere? Does it stay in one place, or move around?

-Timing: When did it start? Did it come on suddenly or slowly? Does it happen continuously? Does it come and go? Is it always there to some extent, but it gets better and worse? On a scale of 1-10, with 1 being fine and 10 being the worst you can imagine, how bad is it at its best, and how bad is it at its worst? How much time does it spend really bad vs only kind of bad?

-Quality: If it's pain, is it aching, burning, stabbing, dull, electrical zap, etc.? If it's not pain, what is it? Is it discomfort? Is it weakness--i.e., you can't do that thing? Is it fatigue--like maybe you can still push through doing the thing but it feels like you're trying to wade through mud to do it? Is it a racing heart, sweating, pressure?

-Triggers: Does something in particular set it off? A time of day, a food, an action, a medication, a thought? A surprisingly common trigger for migraines is sitting still with your neck in one position. (New research suggests that necks are critical to migraine formation, to which I yelled out loud at the paper, no duh!) There may be triggers you haven't noticed; try keeping a symptom diary, where you note down when you have episodes and what you were doing beforehand, what you ate that day, menstrual phase, etc. Any detail that you can remember, whether or not it seems relevant at the time.

I cannot tell you how many times I've dug deeper into a chronic issue only to discover that the patient can, in fact, tell me what the trigger is, but because it's something important to them, they simply haven't noticed. May subconsciously even avoided noticing. Do you get migraines every time you DM? Do you need to work a stretch break into your D&D session?

There can also absolutely be multiple triggers--I know I'll get migraines if I don't sleep, if I'm sick, if I sit still for too long, if I have dental work, etc.

So bring in all the info you can. Write it down if you're afraid you'll forget. Don't hand it to the MA, too many doctors will go "oh my GOD they brought a LIST how high-maintenance" and tune out. Hang on to it but tell them about everything.

I don't expect patients to be able to tell me "I believe I've had a left radial styloid fracture" but I do expect them to tell me "I fell and tried to catch myself with my left hand and now my wrist hurts," and that's good enough. The rest of it is my job. When it's something more vague, like "I started feeling different and bad about six months ago," any other information helps. Did you start a new med around then? Are you going through menopause? Do you struggle with anxiety? Do you have first-degree relatives (parent, sibling, or child) with genetic disorders, autoimmune disorders, etc.? Do you have a history of anemia? Are you vegan? Have you started having night sweats and unexplained weight loss? Did you recently travel internationally? This can go a lot more different directions than a hurty wrist, so bring in all the info you can.

And keep in mind that modern medicine is very limited--much more so than most people think. There is an excellent chance that medicine will not be able to diagnose your condition. It may still be able to offer treatment. It may fall on your shoulders to manage it as best you can, knowing that doctors don't have answers. Nobody can tell me why I have chronic pain, and I don't mean as in "I've asked doctors and they don't know," I mean "I've personally scoured the literature and had the relevant and appropriate tests and no one can know at this phase of medical knowledge." So I deal with it, I've stopped trying to push myself past my reserves because people who can't admit to ignorance tell me to, I keep my painful body moving because that helps, I do PT, I take a multivitamin occasionally because I know my diet sucks. I manage.

There are not always right or wrong answers--I don't take gabapentin, because I don't want the sedation and kidney exposure, but patients with my exact symptoms might find it helpful and may find the risks and costs worth the benefits. My mother, who has whatever it is that I have, right down to the tricky stomach, from whom I presumably inherited it, has taken medication at different points in her life, depending on how much pain she was in and what other responsibilities she has, and that is perfectly reasonable. Autonomy matters. People have to be able to make these choices for themselves, with assistance but not paternalism from their medical professionals, because the math is different for everyone.

[peach-and-bugs]

Prompt based on the Lottie nsfw list...lottie finding out their partner is pregnant and just worshipping the fuck out of them

update: Chapter 1 is up!

imma just write my thought on this for now just bc I love this and wanna giggle and kick my feet over it, but if you want a longer fic like this PLEASE LET ME KNOW! because once I finish more of my requests I would LOVE to write a longer fic or a series of oneshots with this because I personally really enjoy pregnancy fics (a prime example is my series Baby Steps with Madam Satan/Lilith from Chilling Adventures of Sabrina) NSFW headcanons under the cut 💚 (18+, Minors DNI, you will be blocked)

But oh my god, she'd be thrilled! I'm assuming this was something you'd planned together and had been working toward, so there and been building excitement for a while now, but to finally have the confirmation would be like a godsend to her. She'd almost immediately start crying and kissing you all over because she just can't contain herself. Her brain would be going a hundred miles an hour as she starts making a mental list of everything she needs to do for you and she'd immediately want you to take off work, whether you work in the compound or do something else.

however, she gets extremely clingy with the news and it could become overbearing very quickly. She wants to do everything for you because you've taken on the job of bringing a new life into the world after all! Why should you need to do anything else? Of course, it's all just from her excitement rather than thinking you're incapable of caring for yourself. She knows that you're capable and that's what she loves about you. But even after a conversation about letting you do things for yourself, expect her to still try and do everything. She's just less instant about it now.

she's reading every parenting and pregnancy book she can find. I mentioned it a tiny bit before, but Lottie seems like more of the type to gravitate to reading for self-education than looking on the internet, because let's face it, she's completely technologically inept. She often ends your evenings cuddled up in bed with you pressed at her side, her fingers lazily tracing circles over your belly as she reads her book with her glasses on. She'll periodically hem and haw out loud over the text and read aloud facts or questions to you to get an active second opinion. The only issue is that she asks these questions when you are half or almost entirely asleep, so meaningful conversation is very trivial by then.

-💚-

Now, if you thought Lot was all over you before, you've got a whole other thing coming, and it only gets more intense the farther along you are. She can't explain it, but something about knowing you're carrying life everywhere you go, but specifically a life that's connected to the both of you, is so beautiful and extraordinary, and she feels this need to thank you for it in any way that she can.

Her drive goes way up when she starts being able to see the symptoms, which you make fun of her for because there's nothing sexy whatsoever about holding your hair back when you're sick. well, nothing sexy about you, because Lottie is just so good at taking care of you. She keeps your hair out of your face, brushing loose bits from your forehead and rubbing your back as she murmured soothing praises. But back to the point-

She loves the changes in your body no matter how you might feel about them because they're all signs that you're doing something so mesmerizing before her eyes. Honestly, at first, she feels bad for getting so aroused by something wouldn't have expected to have an effect on her and eventually, she confides in you on that, concerned that her increasing sexual attraction and drive stems from something negative. You of course assure her that it's completely natural, and while not as common in women, is a completely normal biological response for a partner to have.

With her need to please so high, she's practically begging you to let her eat you out almost nightly. She was always more aroused in the evenings, but this is a whole new level. her hands linger and wander far more than they did before and she almost throws a temper tantrum when you tell her you don't want to have sex. of course, she respects that, no questions asked, but she does pout till you give her something else to occupy her attention. It's quite cute honestly.

When you are in the mood though, she's extra eager to please, if that's even possible at this point. Her hands are always on you (or in you if you prefer). There can't be a moment where she's not touching you. The whole time, while her mouth is free she's murmuring honey-sweet words of praise and admiration, sinking every feeling she possibly can into how she pleases you because in her mind, making sure that you're pleasured to the fullest while carrying her life is the highest thanks she can give.

She's kissing you everywhere, craving the taste of your skin almost constantly. She's fully devout to you like a saint is devout to her god. In her eyes, you are her ultimate god, her muse, and her master all in one, and she will do absolutely anything it takes to be told that she's done a good job and you're pleased with her.

[nickolox]

((( long ramble post)))

trying to figure wtf is going on with your own mental health without the help of a professional + having a mental illness that already fucks with the way you perceive things (ocd) is genuine hell

like, I HAVE a psychiatrist, but he's fucking. awful and always puts medications first over like, figuring out what the fuck is going on

and everything about this whole procedure just feels like, off???

tldr: local man questions if he has The Dissociative Disorder™ whilst being simultaneously given red herrings and blatantly obvious eye opening signals at the same time, and has the same realizations 30 times over because i am in a constant cycle of denial, forgetting and then rediscovering this bullshit

so to put it in a nutshell most of my psychiatrist discussions about the big disorderly things go like this:

psych: so what are you experiencing me: i keep like, having these massive gaps in my memory, where i have no idea what happened or what i did or anythign for hours and hours at a time, and i looked up what that means and its apparently called dissociating? what does that mean? psych: right, that's a stress response. me: yeah, That makes sense. But I've also been unable to remember major events like my sister's wedding or my graduation... psych: well... obviously you were just anxious lol me: *remembers the photos i have as the only proof i have that those events happened, and im smiling in all of them* maybe?? i mean, it didn't seem like that was the case. psych: (completely ignores that) hmmm. okay. anyways- me: also I've been hearing voices??? psych: where? externally or internally? me: internally psych: (visible relief) oh thank god i was concerned it was schizophrenia for a moment, having an internal dialogue is normal :) me: i can't control the voices though, and they don't sound like my own voice in my mind. they're distinct, and it's not like my OCD either. psych: that's normal, sometimes people just imagine things ^_^

so, it was "anxiety" the first time, came back. told him this shit is still happening, and then he blamed it on my medications, and now i'm on a new set, which i suppose needed to happen anyways?

But like, he told me that brain fog and memory loss are a thing with prozac (what i was taking before) and i was like "huh no one told me that" to which he said "well no one says the full list of side effects because no one would want to take the meds otherwise"

i get home, i look up the fucking manual that comes with prozac when you go on it for the first time, and no where. NOWHERE. is this shit on that list of side effects. i look up a list of the side effects, dozens of sites, NOTHING!!!!

I speak with my bestie and he reminds me that,

I dealt with these problems prior to going on medication (something i didnt even remember, lol)

it has literally nothing to do with anxiety bc he himself has crippling anxiety and deals with none of the shit i do

i'm going to shit bricks dude what the fuck is wrong with my stupid brain, it feels like such a wild challenge compared to when i found out about my OCD, like, dude at least with that bitch it was consistent, it was 24/7. as shit as that was at least I knew it was always there, always there to be a bitch, but undeniable none the less.

This current mystery disorder is like, oooOOOooo i'm going to be here SOME OF THE TIME!!! to make you DOUBT it exists!!! and im sitting here like, is this a symptom or is this my ocd fucking with me bro

i feel like i might have some kind of dissociative disorder, but the problem I'm having is that it's not CONSISTENT??? like, some days I'll be like yeah this is the dream and then other days I cannot physically do anything, remember jack shit, feel like my soul is leaving my fucking body all god damn day?

why do people always talk about alters too, it's like, the one thing I don't experience, or at least, the one thing that's rare enough to not hinder me like the actual dissociation problems.

I feel like I can't be certain, and that sets my OCD off, because my brain goes "what if we're faking- what if you're overreacting" which in turn makes me go. insane. I am going insane.

there is sooo much more i could say, but i just realized it;s half past midnight. I should um. probably go to bed.

Goodnight.

[arcanistsdelight]

Okay, I'm a transwoman, and it's time I talk about the list. This is going to be a long post.

What list, though?

The list of things that were *definitely the real reason* of why I felt like I needed to transition - according to my mother.

It's been over a decade since then, so the list I provide here will not be comprehensive, just the big players that I remember well enough to discuss.

Body Dysmorphia Depression SAD (Seasonal Depression) Bipolar II PTSD

Some non-falsifiable uh... *conditions*: Just an effeminate man Maybe it's the bisexuality? Literal Demons

When I started seeing a therapist to seek a diagnosis for gender dysphoria, we worked our way through that list, at my insistence that we take every potential diagnosis seriously. We talked through them one by one. It took over a year, and a lot of journaling to disprove those that could be disproved. Here's what I learned:

Body dysmorphia is the persistent belief that there is something wrong with the way you appear - typically a small unnoticeable, or non-existent flaw, but not always.

Whoa - that does sound pretty familiar, right? Being concerned about my body and how I appear. That hits home with gender dysphoria really well. So, let's inspect the specifics - what was I so concerned about? Oh... there was nothing wrong with my body... I just didn't feel like it was my body, well, that's dissociation. That's a different symptom. Did I think there was something wrong with my body? No, I was in good shape - I was in the military at the time, my body was hella fit. Was there something that would make me feel more comfortable in my body? Well, it really just came down to the fact that I wasn't a fan of being perceived as male, because that didn't reflect how my brain was processing the world... sounds more like gender dysphoria than body dysmorphia and there's a solution. Let's not rush things though, let's work through the list.

--

Depression is a common comorbidity with gender dysphoria, and this was an accurate diagnosis! Aaaand that made it a very difficult thing to parse. What direction was the depression coming from? What would alleviate it? Well, fortunately, the answer, after nearly 3 months of journaling, one-on-one therapy and a lot of introspection became clear. I was depressed because I had a fair amount of dysphoria about how people addressed me, and how I looked, about how my muscles grew and the way I-myself, and the world at large, perceived me.

--

SAD - Easy, nope. Not Seasonal, the ebb and flow of my reaction to gender dysphoria was just a reflection of my own ability to repress and cope, which I was a master of. You want me to live in denial? Baby, I got you. I know all the tricks... I'll only have a complete mental breakdown every 2-3 years.

--

Bipolar II - Maybe, it's entirely possible. There is definitely a more-energetic and driven/less-energetic and sad cycle in my life that does sometimes resemble a very mild form of Bipolar Disorder. Also, entirely unrelated to what I am experiencing with gender dysphoria. I can be productive, happy and energetic and screaming on the inside; I can be depressed, sad and screaming on the inside; I can be not screaming at all in either of those states. The screams of my dysphoria do not relate to the cyclical pattern of my joys and sorrows.

--

PTSD - Yep, I got that too. Specifically, in the form of CPTSD, and specifically, related to how I've been taught to hate myself for my entire life. No the PTSD didn't cause my trans identity, being a queer youth in a christian town raised by christian parents caused my CPTSD. It wouldn't have mattered what the particulars of my queerness were, it would have all resulted in the same beatings, bullying, and awareness of just how sinful and evil I am in the eyes of the christian god. The cause of that lay with our culture's unnecessary violence and hatred towards those of us that are different.

--

Now, for the non-falsifiables up there, I couldn't really disprove them, hence the title I've given them. Maybe I am just very effeminate... but at some point, does that really matter? I am the type of feminine that I would like it to be known and recognized in everyday life, please and thank you. I am also bisexual, it's true! I would like to be a woman no matter the partner. As for demons? Well, take that up with your god, I can't do shit about it, that sounds like a purview far beyond my own. If he can't control them, how the hell should I? And yes, I spent years in my youth praying for help from god.

So... I did it, I went through the list, and I convinced my mother that I am definitely trans... right?

No. The list never mattered. It was fully a waste of a year of my life, a lot of money and the time of a skilled psychologist. My mother still denies that being trans is a real thing. It doesn't matter that hormones have stopped the depression, that I live far happier and healthier than I ever have before. There is nothing I can do to prove my identity to another human. You just have to trust me, you just have to find some way to believe that I am who I say I am.

I don't believe in extra gatekeeping. Because I tested the gates, they couldn't stop me, only keep me from knowing myself a little bit longer, only give me more time walking the razors edge of suicidality. They won't realistically stop anyone else either, because if you're sure you're trans... you're trans, it's not something else.

[youremyonlyhope]

.

[ridiculously-over-obsessed]

8 fluff from prompt list 2 please :)

Ooo we do like some softness here 🥺🥰 coming right up lovely!! 💖

(8) “I’ll take care of you.”

Beca despised being ill. It was literally the worst thing in the world, she hated feeling gross and snuffly, hated the way it ruined her badass image, hated that she had to stop everything she was doing because her body had decided to get sick. But sick she was, and curled up into the smallest ball possible in her bed, sniffing hard as she waited for her headache medicine to kick in. God this was the worst flu she’d ever had, her whole body ached, her nose was bright red and sore from where she had constantly wiped and blown it, she couldn’t stop coughing which then made her head hurt worse, and she’d been sick three times. Kimmy-Jin had long since left their dorm room, glaring at Beca as if she deliberately gotten the flu just to annoy her, so Beca was all alone in her misery to take care of herself, which was the worst part about all of it (not that she’d ever admit that to anyone).

A knock came at the door as Beca groaned softly, not wanting to move from her cocoon of self-pity and snot as she shivered furiously. God, why couldn’t she get warm? She was under three different blankets for christs sake...

“S’open.” Beca croaked, hoping that whoever it was that was so rudely intruding on her flu-ridden day could hear her.

“Becs?” Chloe’s head appeared around the door as Beca looked at her from under hooded lids, “Are you okay, you haven’t been answering your texts...”

Chloe’s eyes fell upon the very visibly ill Beca, her concerned frown only growing deeper as she walked quickly into the room, kneeling beside Beca as she placed her hand on her forehead.

“Oh sweetie, are you sick?”

“Yeah.” Beca mumbled, too tired and ill to be sarcastic with her, “Stoopid flu...”

“You’re burning up.” Chloe sighed a little as she brushed Beca’s sweat dampened hair from her face, “How long have you been poorly?”

“Coupla days?” Beca shrugged a little, her eyes fluttering shut at the feeling of Chloe’s fingers in her hair, too out of it to hide her suffocatingly huge crush on her friend, “S’fine I guess... jus’ gotta ride it out.”

Beca started to cough hard again, covering her mouth with her hand as Chloe continued to stroke her hair.

“Oh Beca... you should’ve called, you’re really sick, you shouldn’t be on your own like this. Where’s your roommate?”

“Pissed off at the firs’ sniffle.” Beca grumbled, “I think she’s hoping I die so tha’ she can have the room to herself...”

Chloe giggled despite everything, shaking her head at Beca, “Well don’t worry Beca, I’ll take care of you, if only so you can spite Kimmy-Jin.”

“Thanks.” Beca chuckled, wincing as doing so made her achy body worse, “Ugh, I hate this...”

“I know...” Chloe soothed her, “Being ill is the worst, but it’ll be okay. I’ve got you Becs. I’m going to go and get a cold compress for your head and some cold medicine, oh and some chicken soup from that deli on the corner because that’ll make you feel better. When was the last time you ate?”

“Dunno.” Beca shrugged, “I keep pukin’ everythin’ up so...”

“Poor baby...” Chloe sighed, “Alright, soup it is then, that shouldn’t be too hard on your stomach. Rest your eyes, I’ll be half an hour tops, I promise.”

“Kay.” Beca mumbled, not needing any encouragement at all to go to sleep right now, “Thanks Chlo.”

“Of course.” Chloe beamed, “You’re my friend and you’re sick, it’s what you do! I’ll be back soon.”

Chloe pressed a soft kiss to Beca’s burning forehead, Beca hoping she’d write off her flushed cheeks as just another symptom of her flu.

Chloe was true to her word, staying in Kimmy-Jin’s bed (well she wasn’t using it was she?) whilst Beca was ill so she could be there for her whenever she needed her. There had been a particularly mortifying day for Beca when her fever gotten so bad that Chloe’d had to carry her like a child to the communal showers and place Beca under the cold blast of water, fully clothed, until it broke. Beca had whined and shivered and cried a little because she was so ill and so fed up of it, and Chloe was being so kind and caring and she was so gross right now.

When Chloe had carried her back to her bedroom, wrapped in a fluffy towel that she had brought from her place, and helped Beca get dressed (because Beca was too weak to sneeze nevermind dress herself), Beca had cried some more as Chloe hugged her.

“It’s okay Beca, I’ve got you.” Chloe hummed softly, stroking her damp hair.

“I hate bein’ ill...” Beca groaned, “I really hate it Chlo...”

“I know.” Chloe mumbled into her hair, “I know Becs. C’mon, let’s get you back in bed, I’ll braid your hair to get it out of your face and then you can sleep again for a little while.”

“M sorry I’ve been such a baby.” Beca grumbled as Chloe helped her back into her bed.

“It’s okay.” Chloe giggled, “You’re a cute baby. And allowed to be a baby when you’re sick.”

“Shud up.” Beca sniffed, smirking a little, “Um... Chlo?”

“Yeah honey?”

“Can you... can you cuddle me for a bit?” Beca blushed furiously as she sniffled, not looking at Chloe. God she hated being ill...

“Of course.” Chloe beamed brightly as she got under the duvet with Beca, a grateful Beca curling into her side and resting her head tentatively on Chloe’s shoulder.

“Thanks...” Beca whispered, feeling her eyes flutter shut again as Chloe’s arms wrapped around her.

“Anytime Beca.” Chloe smiled softly at Beca, watching as her breathing deepened and her head lolled towards her chest.

“I love you...” Beca’s voice was barely audible as she drifted off to sleep, but Chloe caught it.

“I love you too Becs.” She whispered into her hair.

Eventually Beca was better again, mortified at how vulnerable she had been in front of another person, but at least her flu was almost gone. Chloe no longer slept in Kimmy-Jin’s bed, but she still stopped by her dorm room to check on Beca as she got over the last of it, making sure that Beca wasn’t getting sicker again.

“I’m fine Chloe.” Beca grinned as Chloe pressed her hand to her forehead again, “Really, I’m good.”

“I’m just making sure!” Chloe smiled warmly, brushing Beca’s hair out of her face, “You do look better than you did last week, I was really worried about you.”

Beca rolled her eyes a little but was still smiling as Chloe pulled back, “Thanks Chloe. For taking care of me like that, you didn’t have to.”

“I know I didn’t have to.” Chloe rolled her eyes this time, “But I wanted to! I’m glad you’re feeling better.”

“Ugh me too.” Beca grumbled, “Being ill is the worst...”

“Well, I’d better get going then.” Chloe was breezy as she got to her feet, not wanting to overstay her welcome now that Beca was better. She knew Beca was very protective of her personal space, of herself in general, and as much as she wanted to stay in this bubble where Beca wouldn’t just let her touch her but actively asked her to, but she knew it wasn’t fair to expect that of Beca now she wasn’t feeling ill and vulnerable because of it.

“Uh, I wanna do something for you.” Beca got up to follow Chloe to the door, “Like to say thank you?”

“You don’t have to keep thanking me Becs...” Chloe giggled softly, “But... you can take me out to dinner if you want... just the two of us?”

“Oh.” Beca blushed furiously, shuffling her feet a little, “Like um... like a date?”

“It doesn’t have to be! Not if you don’t want to, you don’t owe me anything like that, I promise!” Chloe quickly shook her head, feeling her heart clench a little. Dammit, she’d pushed too hard...

“No, no...” A smirk started to form on Beca’s face, “I’d like that...”

“Yeah?” Chloe beamed, “Great! Text me then?”

“You got it.” Beca nodded, gently grabbing Chloe’s waist and pulling her close as she made a daring move and pressed her lips softly to Chloe’s, “For um... for looking after me so well...” Beca blushed furiously as Chloe grinned at her.

“Well if you’re going to thank me like that...” Chloe draped her arms around her neck, lips brushing over Beca’s, “Then I can’t complain about it, can I?”

“You’re so weird...” Beca smirked, kissing Chloe again.

This might be the best flu she’d ever had. 

[anders-hawke]

Signs

Episode: “Je Souhaite” | Rated M | @today-in-fic | Warning: if any of the symptoms of pregnancy are squicky for you, it would be best to avoid this fic. Also, a reminder that we use Fahrenheit in the U.S., so don’t freak out at the wonky temperature stuff, my Celsius loaves.

Scully feels a little guilty for sending Mulder home last night after teasing him all day about what she was going to do to him in bed, but she blames her upset stomach on being “forced” to skip lunch that day. Scully had waved him off after three hours of on and off vomiting, feeling like she sent the entirety of her pizza and soda into the toilet.

She’d sent him back to his apartment so he’d stop hovering, his incessant chatter only magnifying the headache beginning to build at the base of her skull.

Mulder had called as soon as he got home, leaving a voicemail for her to please not come in tomorrow if she’s still sick. Well, Scully had fortunately felt right as rain when she woke up, aside from the minimal gnawing feeling in her stomach.

She regrets eating two bagels with lox and her real cream cheese now. This must be her punishment for breaking the rule of saving it for the fair amount of bad mornings she encounters. Her stomach’s mutinying again at the smell of Mulder’s black coffee and she can feel another toilet session coming on.

“Oh, God,” Scully whispers, all intent to apologize and press a soft kiss to his lips going out the proverbial door as she sprints out the real one and hauls ass to the bathroom.

She must have a stomach bug, Scully reasons, trying to even out her breathing as she folds some paper towels and wets them before pressing them against her face and neck. She’s suddenly feeling strangely hot, evidence of her sick flushed away.

Mulder knocks three times on the bathroom door. “Scully?”

“Yeah?” she sends back, splashing her face with water. She groans as she feels another gag coming on.

“I brought you some ginger ale and—and some Pepto Bismol. And Tums. I know you don’t like the Pepto but, you know, I figured this called for all the stops.”

She can imagine the look on his face as he hears her vomiting again. Scully checks her watch when it’s over. It’s still only 8:27 in the fucking morning!? How the hell is she supposed to make it through the rest of the workday like this?

The door hinges creak and she looks over at Mulder. “I told you not to come in if you’re still sick, Scully.”

“I wasn’t! I felt fine this morning, and then I walked in the office and smelled your coffee and...”

He leans against the counter and crosses his arms, puckering his lips as part of his exaggerated thinking face. Scully stands up straight and shoots him a look. Mulder shakes his head and puts his hands up. “Look, all I’m saying is that it looks like the same thing happened last night. As soon as we got out the ice cream, you bolted to the bathroom.”

She sighs and shakes her head. “What are you getting at, Mulder?”

“Just that you should go home and at least take a nap or something. If you stay off your feet for a few hours and relax, I’ll be happy. Nibble on some crackers, catch a soap opera...” Mulder shrugs. “You’re clearly sick, Scully. If not for yourself, do it on the chance that it’s contagious.”

Scully places the wet paper towel on the back of her neck, holding it there. “Fine. But only because it might be contagious.”

“I mean—that doesn’t make it better, but thank you nonetheless. Do you want me to drive you? What if there’s a random smell that sets you off on the ride there?”

She rolls her eyes but tells him, “Fine.”

—

Mulder’s assertion that certain smells have been setting off whatever’s going on with her stomach seem to be proven true when she comes back to the office after a few hours of rest and relaxation to the harsh sight of a man whose... whose mouth suddenly disappeared and had to be surgically recreated. Not a twinge from her stomach aside from shock butterflies.

Scully’s relieved that she’s been able to keep down her lunch. To be fair, it was crackers with a little cheese and a full two cups of water to make sure she was hydrated, but any food is good food. She proudly announces to Mulder during their ensuing flight the next day that it seems whatever illness hit is gone.

—

It’s not cold in Creve Coeur, Missouri—certainly not in Spring—but Scully’s feeling every degree of the breeze through the open windows like it’s in the thirties. She’s shivering the entire car ride to the Mark Twain Trailer Park, and noticeably enough for Mulder to glance at her with concern before putting up the windows and turning the heat up.

“You okay?”

“Yeah, I’m fine. Just a little cold.”

He frowns at that but lets it go until they hit a red light, when he leans over and presses his hand to her forehead.

Scully quirks her lips in a smile. “What are you doing?”

“Checking your temperature,” he replies. “You don’t seem to have a fever...”

“I’m fine, Mulder,” she insists, leaning into his hand for the few seconds she gets the light turns green.

“Alright, but if you’re still sick, Scully, then you have to promise me that you’ll go back to the motel, okay? I brought the meds just in case, if you need them.”

She smiles softly and places her hand on his arm. “Thank you.”

“It’s what a good boyfriend does.”

—

Her stomach bug really does seem to be gone, which is a relief. However, she’s now insatiably hungry for two things: Mulder, and the bagels from the bagel place two streets over from her apartment. Well, she consoles, one is attainable, at least. And, boy, does she attain it. They’re both breathing heavily by the time Scully’s through with him, and even though they’re sticky with sweat, she curls her body around Mulder’s anyway.

Her breasts are tingly, which has never happened after sex before, but she chalks it up to Mulder’s harsh treatment of her only a minute ago as she nuzzles his chest. She inhales and sighs happily. “I love the way you smell,” she murmurs.

He laughs and she feels it against her cheek. “Coming from the woman who made me start using a different deodorant,” he jokes, squeezing his arm around her shoulders. “Your nipples are darker.”

“What?” Scully props herself up with her forearm to make proper eye contact as her brows furrow.

“Yeah. I don’t know. They’re darker. Feel a little heavier, too. You didn’t notice?”

She shakes her head and laughs. “Unlike you, Mulder, I don’t spend hours studying my boobs.”

He shrugs and rolls them over so he’s hovering over her on his forearms. “Your loss.”

—

“Fuck,” she swears, digging around in her suitcase, fresh from her shower. She’s only got one hand because the other’s holding her towel wrap together.

“What?” Mulder asks around his toothbrush, exiting the bathroom. His tie is slung behind his neck and his suit jacket is waiting for him on the bed.

“I don’t have any panty liners.”

“Do you want me to go out and get some?” he asks, heading back to the bathroom to spit.

“Yeah, that would be great.” Scully walks past him into the still-warm bathroom and lets the towel drop as she uses the one wrapped around her hair to dry the wet strands.

“Alright. I’ll be back in a jiffy.” She drops the hair towel when he takes the singular step needed in the tiny motel bathroom to invade her space in favor of pulling him down for a kiss by the ends of his tie. “Mmm, settle down or the plan’ll be botched.”

“I was just thanking you,” Scully says, affecting innocence as she does his tie for him.

“For buying you panty liners? What would happen if I surprised you with some ice cream?”

“I would eat the ice cream.”

“Damn.” Mulder presses a kiss to the top of her head before heading out to put on his suit jacket. “Do you mind me asking why you need panty liners? Also! What brand?”

“Any with wings. And I need them because there’s been an unusual amount of vaginal discharge in my underwear and I don’t want to ruin any more of them.”

“Right.” He steps back in view of the bathroom and takes in her naked body.

Scully raises an eyebrow at him. “What?”

(Their books on pregnancy are buried inside their storage closets from a time best forgotten.)

“Nothing. I just like looking at you.”

She smiles at him, drying her hair again. “Get going, hotshot.”

—

Halfway through the flight home, Scully discovers something that makes her a bit worried. She’s not supposed to get her period until next week, so the blood on the liner she quickly tosses away with shaky hands can’t be because of that. She tries to forget about it as she walks back to her seat next to Mulder, but he must see something on her face that prompts him to ask if she’s okay.

“I’m fine,” she lies, managing to give him a smile. “Just tired.”

He seems to accept that and leaves her be. It’s not even a lie; she feels exhausted after everything that happened over the past few days. Scully makes a mental note to book an emergency appointment with her Ob-Gyn when they land, and closes her eyes.

—

“Dana,” Dr. Namin starts, disrupting her patient’s thumb twiddling.

Scully abruptly stands up as her doctor moves to stand in front of the exam table, computer and several documents in hand. “You don’t look concerned,” she says, following Namin to the exam table.

“Because there’s nothing to be concerned about at this stage except plenty of rest, hydration, and eating at least three good meals a day,” Scully’s doctor replies, opening up her computer and spreading out the documents. “We’ve done all the tests you asked for, but nothing came up. However, based on the symptoms you listed, I performed one more, and that’s where we found the culprit.”

“What do you mean?”

“You’re pregnant, Dana. Plain and simple. Congratulations.” Dr. Namin slides one of the documents towards Scully, who takes it. “You’re about three and a half weeks along. You can take all the papers. There’s suggestions for all the prenatal vitamins you’ll need to take and how much water to drink in a day. Resources for managing symptoms, too.”

Scully nods dumbly, tears gathering in her eyes as she stares at the diagnosis. “Um, when should I come back?”

“Don’t worry about that right now, I’ll have someone give you a call with that information. Just relax and enjoy the news. I remember how much you wanted this, Dana. I...I don’t know how this happened, but the baby’s doing well. Minor bleeding is completely normal and you don’t need to worry. If it gets worse or doesn’t stop soon, then come back.”

“Okay,” Scully chokes out, smiling widely as she wipes away her tears and collects the documents on the exam table.

—

She spends a few hours at her apartment trying to figure out how to tell Mulder the good news but gets nowhere. In the middle of pacing around her couch, one arm unconsciously wrapped around her abdomen, her phone starts ringing.

“Scully speaking.”

“Agent Scully,” Skinner starts, and she immediately knows that Mulder’s done something stupid again, “could you check on Agent Mulder? He snuck into my meeting and was yelling at my chair.”

“Yes, of course, sir.”

“Thank you.”

Scully hangs up the phone and sighs heavily. Looks like God’s giving her a sign to just get it over with. When she enters the office, however, the woman Mulder keeps insisting is a genie is there, too. She licks her lips nervously and tries to ignore her.

“Skinner called me, Mulder. Is everything alright?”

Sitting at the desk, computer on, she has to wonder what he’s doing. “You don’t remember disappearing off the face of the Earth for an hour this morning?”

She gives her head a small shake as she tells him, “No,” truly starting to get concerned.

Mulder just shrugs with a little smile and gets back to typing with a nonchalant, “Well, I guess everything’s okay.”

Get it out, just say it, she thinks, trying to psych herself up. She sighs. “Mul—” But the woman’s still there in the office. “Could you give us a minute, please?”

“Sure,” the woman—Jenn, Mulder told her on the plane—says with a nod.

Scully steps closer to the desk, butterflies in her stomach. Jenn isn’t moving, and it’s making her annoyed, quite frankly. “Like, today?” she says, turning around, but the black-haired woman is nowhere to be found, not even in the annex. Scully turns back to her partner, extremely confused. “Where the hell’d she go?”

Mulder childishly imitates a genie disappearing and she feels the sudden urge to laugh at the thought that this man is the father of her child. “No...” she says, softening the guffaw trying to escape to a scoff-laugh. “It’s gotta—” She scoffs for real this time. “It’s gotta be hypnotism, or—or mesmerism, or something.”

And thus begins the verbal sparring. As he lists all the things he wants for the world, Scully thinks, again, of how this is the father of her child. Something suspiciously soft is trying to emerge from her heart as she responds, and she’s a coward to boot, so she leaves without telling him. Driving back to her apartment, Scully feels guilty at how little effort she put into trying to break the news to Mulder. She just—she doesn’t know what to make of the news herself, let alone how to explain it to him.

An hour into The Exorcist, hugging a pillow as she wishes Mulder was watching it with her, the phone rings. “Scully, do you wanna come over and watch a movie? I’ve got your favorite popcorn...”

She grins. “Of course. I’ll bring the drinks.”

—

They’ve both changed their clothes for the movie night, and when Mulder opens the door, they’re sporting matching grins. “Oh, zero alcohol content?” he faux complains, taking the case of six drinks into the kitchen. “Is this your punishment for me, Scully?”

She elects not to respond as she follows him and takes out the package of popcorn and a pot. “Can you grab the olive oil, Mulder?”

“Yeah, of course.” He puts four of the drinks in the fridge before reaching into one of the cabinets to grab the oil and put it on the counter next to the stove, which Scully’s turning it on.

“I’ll never understand why you won’t just microwave them. It’s faster.”

“Yeah, but if you do it in the pot, it tastes better,” she shoots back, opening the package and pouring the kernels into the pot.

“That’s just because of the oil.”

“Well, you can continue to eat shitty popcorn for the rest of your life if you want, but I’m going to eat my good popcorn.”

They turn to face each other as the kernels pop and hit the lid, a staring contest beginning. Scully wins when she licks her lips and distracts Mulder enough to get him to blink.

“Ha! I got you! I win!”

“That’s cheating!”

“I won!” she says in a sing-song voice, emptying the finished popcorn into the bowl.

Mulder shakes his head with a smile. “Why don’t you take the drinks and get comfortable. I’ll finish the popcorn.”

Scully nods and does as he suggests, but as she’s crossing into the living room, she pauses and turns around. “No butter, please,” she says, and he turns around with a scoop of butter in a bowl in his right hand, the handle of the microwave in the other.

“No... butter...?” She nods. “We always put butter on the popcorn, Scully.”

“Well, I don’t want butter this time,” she says, and makes her way to the couch, sitting down and placing the drinks on the coffee table. She hears Mulder sigh heavily and put the bowl of butter in the fridge before making his way to the living room, bowl of popcorn in hand.

He shakes his head as he grabs the movie case from the table and inserts it into the player. “Can’t believe you don’t want butter on your popcorn. Eugh. It’s un-American.” He steps around the table and sits down next to Scully.

She takes the case from where he left it and makes a face. “Caddyshack, Mulder?” she questions.

“It’s a classic American movie,” he insists, grabbing his drink and propping his feet up.

“That’s what every guy says.” Scully grabs her own and untwists the cap, tossing it onto the table. Mulder does the same, but his bounces off onto the floor, and she laughs into the bottle. “So, uh... What’s the occasion?” she asks, as if they still take the justifying movie nights thing seriously.

Last week’s was I thought you might need some help feeding your fish.

“I don’t know. Just felt like the thing to do. Cheers.”

Maybe it is time to turn over a new leaf, especially considering the baby growing inside her, cell by cell. They clink their bottles—“Cheers,” she says—and drink. Tell him, tell him, tell hi—

“I don’t know if you noticed, but I, um, never made the world a happier place.”

They nod together and Scully knows that this is the moment to tell him. She takes a deep breath. “Well, I’m fairly happy. That’s something.” A smile slides onto her face and she looks at him, a lot more than fairly happy now. “Actually, I’m ecstatic.” She gives a little laugh and reaches into her pocket for the piece of paper she’d stared at for hours earlier.

“Really? Is there a specific reason, or...?”

Scully pulls the paper out and looks at the blue highlighted text on the portion of the paper that’s not folded back for a moment before handing it to Mulder. “That’s why,” she says, voice trembling a little out of happiness.

She watches his face as the words sink in. He reads it again, murmuring, “Diagnosis: pregnancy (3.5 weeks),” as he does so, a grin spreading across his lips. “Scully...”

“I know,” she says, setting her bottle on the table, and before Mulder can say anything else, she cups his cheeks and kisses him, unwilling to fight the urge.

“Scully, this is wonderful!” He laughs joyously and kisses her again, setting the paper and his drink on the table. “I’m so happy.” He brings her into his embrace and buries his face in her shoulder for a long moment, both of them starting to cry. He suddenly pulls away and puts his hand on her abdomen under her shirt, his other arm still wrapped around Scully.

“I love you,” she tells him.

“I love you, too,” he replies.

[coldvampire]

i'm not sure if i want to develop this into a oneshot or just leave it in my head but i've been in a perculair headspace lately when am i not, truly, and I've been trying to work out how katerina's ptsd makes itself known.

first of all, i think she would deny it's actual an issue for her in spite of being able to list off symptoms she experiences like she's reading from the diagnostic criteria. part of that is the residual shame, part of it is not wanting to fully face the gravity of what happened to her. either way, a lot of denial happening there.

anyway.

'smell' seems to be a trigger i keep returning to. it's one i don't see people talk about a lot compared to other senses, but it's pretty visceral. the scenario i keep specifically ruminating over is involving a very similar cologne to the one apollonnio wore. it's actually a pretty nice scent, not even an uncommon one either, but the association is just forever tainted for her. in this unfortunate scene, it's either a cologne or maybe a shower product nines turns up wearing and it's not exactly the same, but it's close enough that she tenses up when she detects it and she knows it's someone she trusts and loves wearing it but god, she can't stop shaking, and she's jumpy and on edge and eventually she knows he's going to notice something up with her so she has to ask if he's trying out a new soap or something and can she replace it with literally anything else he wanted? i think she'd hate herself a little (a lot) for even having to make the request even though it's honestly not a big deal to him at all, he gets it, he knows what her fledgling years were like or at least enough to understand why she's so upset.

unfortunately, this just sends her over the edge, i think, just the nonchalance and general concern over her wellbeing over such a relatively small thing. she's absolutely going to start crying, and it sounds so disgustingly pathetic to her ears when her voice starts breaking & she can't even let herself cry loudly because oh god, what if her sire hears the sobs and comes to give her a real reason to cry? the self-loathing is intense; she feels like she's being stupid, and weak, and nines is probably completely over her dramatics at this point and eventually he'll surely get tired of all her strange quirks and hyper-specific needs to feel safe from a man who met final death a while ago (at her own hand no less!)

but it's okay. he swears up and down that it's okay. he's not mad, why would he be? it's just a scent. it was probably on sale, the first thing he grabbed off the shelf, he's not attached to it in the slightest. at the risk of possibly making things worse, i think he would hold her. sometimes he's good with his words, and it's all she needs, but this isn't really one of those times. katerina is not a big woman. he forgets, sometimes, that she barely comes up to his chin and probably only weighs about 120 lbs soaking wet. she's got a big personality, absolutely. a resonant voice and presence that can fill a room, when she's feeling like herself. it's a warmth he's never been able to ignore.

not for the first time, he regrets not at least having a chance to be the one that reduced apollonnio di fiorelli to dust. that man deserves nothing less than agony before death. all he can do now is channel that righteous anger into helping her pick up the pieces of herself. it's a slow process, there are setbacks, but he can't imagine not doing it. they've been through too much to let old ghosts destroy them now.

so he clears his schedule for the evening as much as he can. emergency calls only. she still feels ridiculous when he's holding her and rubbing her back like that, and it's such an odd mix of bad memories (that wretched scent) with the sturdy comfort (nines rodriguez, who she'd perhaps foolishly allowed herself to find home in) but it feels good to let someone else hold her up for once. he tells her that they can go out right now and get something else, he'll change and shower, the whole thing will take maybe thirty minutes to take care of, and they'll take his bike instead of her car so she doesn't feel trapped, how does that sound?

part of her is still screaming at herself for being weak, both to the suggestion and her emotions, she should fight this harder, how was it fair that apollonnio still fucked with her mind this way as a dead man? she was better than that. But instead she just sniffles and nods and can't look him in the eye because she knows her makeup is running (as if that's something he's never seen before), and follows nines outside while he refuses to let go of her hand until the last possible second.

she'll be okay, eventually. one day at a time.

[mar-iiposa]

"You're What?"

prompt: How would the Bayverse boys react to their s/o finding out that she is pregnant, and she is afraid/scared to tell them? The pregnancy was not planned. Hope you're having a great day/night <3

a/n: this was requested by an anonymous user as a bit of a long story, meant for all four turtles, but I'm deciding on separating it so it looks better on my masterlist later on. hope that enjoy, and make sure to read the tags I have included down below, just in case !

warnings: slight mention of abortion but that's it, mention of needles drawing blood (not too graphic of course), unplanned pregnancy, mentions of unprotected sex.

word count: 2.6k

"Y/N, are you okay?"

Your roommate, April's, voice rang out when she saw you hurry towards the bathroom in such a rush, for the third time today, and it was just barely 2 pm. She was concerned that you weren't doing so good, never having seen you in a peculiar state like this before. As late of this past week, you've started to show signs of illness and restlessness, constantly moody, which we knew was odd for you at times. "Do you need anything?" She gently knocked on the bathroom door, hearing the faucet run on the other side before it was turned off. "I'm good, thanks," You murmur, loud enough for her to at least comprehend what you're saying. Outside of the restroom, April looked down for a moment, hesitant on whether to truly believe you or not. However, she didn't bother to really question it. "I'll be out, text if you need me."

After getting up a little too fast, you feel a small, sharp pain in your breasts, causing you to wince and cup them lightly out of instinct. Over the last few days, you've been noticing some changes. Weird ones too. For starters, you missed your period, it was supposed to roll around about, what, three/four days ago. You kept it tracked monthly on your phone, and by now, it would seem to probably come later than usually expected. Never did you have an irregular menstrual cycle, sometimes periods tend to come a little bit late but this was still odd enough. Not to forget, you had been vomiting like crazy at times, especially in the mornings and early afternoons of the day, sometimes at night if you're "lucky" enough. Topping those off, you felt fatigued, you were bloated, strangely moody, and you really needed to pee way more. A lot more, actually.

You had turned off the faucet in the bathroom, hunching over the sink, still with little droplets of water sliding down and into the drain. You look into the mirror, bags under your eyes have started to form from lack of sleep after literally vomiting your guts out in the middle of the night, having to hold your own hair back yourself if April would be completely knocked out from work. It wasn't a rare occurrence for her to be passed out on her bed or the couch, after a long day of working. You were employed, too, it was just that you took a day off to find out what the hell these symptoms were. Who knows, maybe you were falling sick?

You do your hair and style it just a little, unbothered by if you looked like crap or not, you could care less. You were throwing up and felt almost sick, why wouldn't you look unappealing at the very least? Grabbing your keys and things, you make your way towards the subway almost downtown, avoiding eye contact with almost anyone and everyone, not feeling at your best. It felt like your self-esteem had taken a downwards decline in the last couple of days prior. Not that you never got irritated or anything, but it was peculiar to you that all of a sudden, you had mood swings that changed from one mood to another like a bolt of lightning. Hell, even your boyfriend, Leo, noticed fairly quickly, but he decided not to press on you too much about it.

Getting off of the subway train, you head to your physician's office, opening the door of the building, the cooled atmosphere of the room hitting you within seconds of your entrance of the room.

"Hello, Ms. L/N, are you here for your appointment today?" The female receptionist gazed up at you from her glasses, frames pink, wearing a light shawl over her arms and shoulders. "I am," You give her a nod, her gaze traveling back to the computer screen as she typed away, the sound of her dark red acrylics hitting the smooth black keys. "Sure does get cold in here," She chuckled, a small short in the middle of her laugh, "take a seat, miss."

Doing so, you sit near the TV of the waiting room, the magazines on the table ahead stared back at you, the words 'VOGUE' written on the modernistic cover. The television was of bland taste, just going over the weather expected for today and the rest of the week and into the weekend. You cradle yourself slightly, your e/c eyes flickering down to your fingers and nails. About fifteen minutes or so later, the door to the back of the office opened, a nurse appearing in her scrub, "Y/N L/N?" Perking up at the mention of your name, you both make eye contact and she steps aside for you to walk in, giving a nod before directing you to a nearby room. Taking a seat, you wait until the doctor comes into view, greeting you with a friendly smile. "Ms. L/N, hi," She shook your hand, holding a clipboard under her left arm as she entered, "how are you? Is there a reason as to why you made an appointment for today?" Seconds after listing off your symptoms, she eyed you a bit suspiciously, writing down with her pen. "I'll send one of the nurses in for a blood test, I'm sure you'll be free to go then," The doctor pursed her lips in a tight smile, looking as though she had something on her mind as to what you could've had.

You sit there, for what feels like hours upon hours of silence, and you don't even notice the nurse coming in through the door at some point. "Alright, just relax for me." A pinching at your skin came from the needle, and the nurse draws some blood from your arm. Closing your eyes and glancing away from the view, the needle is drawn away from your arm after a while, patching the spot up with a band-aid. "You should get your answers shortly," 'Angela Bardot' (the nurse) states with a small, friendly smile as you give her a nod for a reply in return.

The receptionist sends you a wave goodbye as you approach the door on the way out, nodding your head and giving a wave back. Traveling home among the streets of New York, your mind is constantly filling up to the absolute brim of what the results would be. What if you were terrible sick? Had an illness that was incurable or deadly? How would you tell the ones you loved? Always tending to think of negative outcomes was a habit of yours, for as long as you can remember. You're so deep into your thoughts as you don't realize your boyfriend had called you a couple of times already. You unlock your phone after typing in the digits of your password, tapping onto his contact. "Hey," His voice rings from the other side, "I was trying to call you, is everything alright?" You can hear the worried tone through his end.

You run a hand through your hair as you neared the corner, coming closer to your New York apartment. "Yeah," you breathe out into the air of the apartment building, taking the provided elevator, "yeah, I'm okay." You could almost see the look of relief in those blue sapphire eyes of his, he responds, "Sorry, I almost panicked when you didn't pick up." You chuckle a little at that, knowing you almost always picked up on phone calls, holding onto your keys as you pushed your front entrance door open, "Nah, you know I can handle myself, Leo." You grin hearing his voice, chuckling at that. "I know, I know." 

"I'll see you tonight?" He asks on his end, you immediately smile. "I give you my word." You can feel him smiling from 'ear to-ear' at your response, "Okay, I'll see you later then. Love you, princess." Your smile growing warm, heart fluttering at the words coming from your boyfriend, you speak back into the phone, "Love you too."

He was the first to hang up on the cell phone call, before you fall back onto your grey couch with a heavy sigh, soon leaning forward with your head in your hands, elbows firmly sitting on top of your knees. The TV is turned on from the remote in your hand, head leaning back into the couch, but only enough to still keep your eyes on the screen. Your phone rings again, and you assume it might be Leo again, calling to tell you something he might have forgotten or who knows what. Turning the phone over from it's front facing the cushions, and you recognize the contact number. "Hello?" You pick up, a recognizable voice rang through. "Hi, this is Dr. Rullston, I'm calling you to discuss your blood test results, yes?" Sitting straight up quickly, you feel yourself nod almost frantically, "Yes, it's not anything, right?" A long pause resonates between the two of you, and you can slightly hear the intake of a breath from her.

"Ms. L/N, you're pregnant."

Your heart completely drops as soon as you heard that, standing up from your seat within milliseconds. "What? I- I can't belie- !" She continues, "About almost two weeks pregnant is what I'm seeing. Congratulations miss." No, no, I didn't want a baby! I didn't know this would happen! 

You look down at the floor as your breathing is nearly stressed, "Tha- Thank you, Dr. Rullston." Quick to hang up first, you almost drop your phone onto the apartment's hard wooden floor. How was this possible? Well, you knew how pregnancy and sex worked, but this was something completely shocking, at least to you! You think you at least had intercourse with a condom on! You and Leonar- Oh God, Leo! How would he react to this? He would be disappointed, he could leave you! Who would want to raise a child with you? Who would even want a knocked up lady if he did leave the relationship you had been building for practically a year?! You could get an abortion, that's it! No, no, no, you couldn't see yourself going through with that. Seeing others get abortions was something you were supportive of, but you had no absolute idea what in the hell to do! Do you want to keep it? That was something you didn't know the answer to. 

Two hours roll by until you're dressed a little more properly now, on your path to the turtles' lair in the sewers. As of now, you're (somewhat) rocking some jeans, with an old t-shirt, your commonly-worn shoes, and your hair combed through. Sticking your head through the lair, Mikey spots you straightaway, quickly riding on his skateboard towards you, guarding your own stomach, afraid for impact. Luckily for you (and maybe your fetus), there is no impact. "Yo, Y/N!" He gave you his regular fist pump, "how's it hangin'?" He notices you guarding your stomach, emitting a laugh as he points at you, "What's with the stomach guarding?" You realize your arms protecting your stomach, pulling them away fairly quickly. "Just, uh- Just hungry is all!" Michelangelo eyed you for a second or two before shrugging, picking up his board with a swift kick at its tail, "M'kay! Leo's in his room by the way. Catch you later!" He rode off again, presumably to bother either Raph or Donnie with his "dazzling personality."

Nearing Leonardo's room, you were undecided on the option of telling him about the growing baby inside of you or not. You didn't know. You didn't know what he'd think, what he'd say, how he would react, or if his perspective of you would shift entirely. Every fiber of your being grew anxious, scared to share the news with him. Or not. Leaning against the doorway of his room, he looked up from his katana, a smile gracing his features. "Hey," He stood up from his spot on the bed as you approach him, "Hi." Leonardo glanced down at your shorter human self, grabbing your hands to hold into his abnormally larger ones. "Took you a while to get here." Yeah, it did because you couldn't stop vomiting into the toilet until you got the strength to eventually walk all the way down here. "Sorry, busy," You threw an excuse at him, the leader of the clan nods. "Uh-huh," He takes your hand and leads you to his bed, "you're not overwhelming yourself, are you?" Knowing how concerned he can tend to be, you shakily exhale a little, giving a closed-mouth smile. "No, not really."

"You know ho-" You bit your lower lip, feeling the need to interrupt, "Leo, there's-- there's something I need to tell you." He paused for a little, knowing there was something up, a feeling in his gut. "Well what is it?" You can feel that pit of anxiety start to blossom within you once again, your palms nearly growing sweaty as you try to gather your words. Carefully wanting to break it to him was something you wanted to do, and correctly too. "Y/N?" He sends you a fervent glance, "is something wro-?" 

"I'm pregnant."

He's taken aback by the sentence you had just formed, staring at you, with almost little to no emotion being expressed. He's speechless. Out of words, completely. "You're what?! With- With my ba-?" Giving the leader a small, slow nod, it finally makes sense to him. "That's why you missed my call? Y/N, you sh-" You feel tears swell up in your e/c eyes, a hot droplet starting to slide down your left cheek, "I know it's all my fault. I should have asked for an abortion before I left that doctor's office. And you don't want a kid, I can see perfectly see that, and just know that I'm sor-" A warm green hand cups the side of your face, endearing blue eyes look at you and hold your stare as a thumb comes to wipe your new, built-up tears. Tender lips come to kiss your forehead. "I want this. Y/N, please listen to me when I say it'll be alright. I won't let you and the baby down, okay?" Leo's words are kind, softly spoken as he offers you a pursed smile while holding your face in his hand, "You'll be fine."

Your breathing is starting to calm down as you meet his eyes, your hand coming touch his on your cheek. "How far? How far are you, I mean?" Feeling at ease, your eyes are still watery with tears, a smile growing on your lips, "Two weeks." He grows soft at your reply, eyes flickering down towards your stomach. The stomach that held his kid inside of it. "How big are they?" You hold your hand up and leave a little gap between your index finger and your thumb, "Like a little seed." A smile of joy lights up his face before he carefully runs the bottom of your t-shirt up to expose your stomach to him. He pursed his lips together once more, fighting off tears as he gives a breathy laugh. "I love them already." You grin to your significant other, kissing his cheek.

"And we love you too."

[xsarcasticwriterx]

Wonderwall- part 4

Summary: The ultrasound and talk of things starts to raise some questions

Pairing: Tony stark x reader x bucky barnes/ with a tiny slice of stucky x reader (really tiny)

Warnings: Angst, talk of emotional/ physical abuse, lot of fucked up shit but not much else triggering i don't believe, Swearing,

Notes: This chapter is pretty fucked but uh it's got some fluff pfft (also ignore my random yeehawness coming out when i say y'all, k? thanks)

Wonderwall masterlist

You awoke to the feeling of warmth all around you. Opening your eyes you saw bucky in front of you his arm over your waist you smile but you see another arm. you look over your shoulder seeing steve and you give a soft smile. guess he fell asleep. you see him move a little before his eyes flutter open. he looks at you and then around. you turn slowly trying not to awaken bucky. “hi” you whisper. steve removes his arm from you and rubs his face “hey” he whispers back. “guess i fell asleep here” he said with a small smile. His blonde hair was messy and his eyes were half asleep. “come on” you whisper and get out of bed.

Stever follows after and you two walk outside. you sit on the steps and inhale the cold air. It was really late, or early depends how you look at it. Steve sat next to you “figured we could talk more out here without waking up buck” you said. steve nodded “makes sense to me” he said looking you over. you were curled into a ball rubbing your arms for warmth. “here” he said taking off his long sleeve shirt handing it to you. you smiled “thanks” you put it on inhaling the smell of him which was like soap honestly. 

You closed your eyes putting your head on steve's shoulder “you ok there?” steve asked. you shrugged “i dont know i’m pregnant and not with my boyfriends kid and i slightly worry what's going to happen to them.” you say opening your eyes and looking down while messing with your fingers.”What do you mean?’ steve asked. you thought over what you wanted to say. what could you say? you had no clue if this kid would have powers because you technically were born this way? That your father injected your pregnant mom with serums to save her and you and it only broke your life forever and didn't even save your mother. “y/n?” steve asked. you lifted your head looking over steves face. he was concerned and confused. 

He wanted to make sure you were ok but he also needed to know what you meant. you opened your mouth but then the door opened. “there you are” bucky said. you turned your head and smiled “hi sweetheart.” you say standing up with a smile.Steve was still confused as hell. “you ok there steveo?” buck asked. steve blinked looking at where you were clinging to bucky's side as steve held you close. It was like a complete 180 from how you were 5 seconds ago. “always buckeroo” steve said with a smile. “go back to sleep doll ill be in, in a few”  buck said to you. you looked at steve then buck and nodded slowly.

“whats up?” bucky asked steve. “I dont know...she...bucky what do you know of her y'know past like before nick fury got her?” steve asked. bucky shifted his weight from foot to foot. He knew everything, he had found you one night having a panic attack. You told him everything in a panic and he understood what it was like. It was how you two became so close. “why?” bucky asked. “she said she worry for what's going to happen to the baby. I don't know if she means raising them but from the sound of it and how nervous she was i assume that wasn't it.” steve said still concerned. Bucky nodded he knew what you meant. He pulled steve in for a hug “thanks for tell me steve” he said pulling away “don't worry about it i got it handled” bucky said patting steves cheek and walking in. steve sighed and walked to his room. 

--

You sat on the chair as the ultrasound transducer rubbed over your stomach “well it seems you are about a month pregnant. the baby is very healthy everything seems to be good so keep doing whatever your doing” she said putting up the wand “which of you is the father?” she asked and tony raised his hand. “but i'm the boyfriend” bucky said. the doctor nodded slowly “oh ok” she said “well uh you know just help her with the symptoms and everything but yall are good” she said with a smile. “uhm i do have one small question” she said. “there was something...strange i've never seen it before. It was like...an aura  around the baby” she said confused. you gulped looking up at the boys. they looked back at you. she wiped the gel off of you and with that y'all left in a rush

you slammed the car door and started to panic. once home you ran to your room “I’ll deal with it” bucky said. Tony grabbed bucky's wrist “you gotta tell me what's going on.” tony said. bucky nodded “I will, we will.” and with that bucky walked off after you.

He walked into the room seeing you sitting on the edge of the bed staring down at the floor. “I can't have a child turn out.....be me” you said messing with your hands. “Y/n.... you are not your father if this baby is like you it dosent mean you’ll be like him” bucky said sitting next to you. 

“I don't want my child to have powers i don't want them to be a god damn avenger spending everyday wondering if their going to die or wondering if this is the day they snap.” you said feeling your breathing get shaky and tears build up in your eyes. The last thing you wanted the last thing you needed was for your baby to have to be trained to control such powers. “tony asking?” you ask turning to bucky.

he nods “yea” he whispers. “My father forced me to be this way he saw it as saving me, saving my mother, in the end i came out with powers that i had no control over till i was 17 and didn't even know i had till i was 5 and still didn't have a mother.” you said wiping the tears from your face. 

“but you know your baby will, you now know how to control it and can teach them, it won't be the same you know not to do those things to your child” bucky said. you nodded bucky sighed and walked out the room.

At some point you fell asleep. Waking in the middle of the night you felt bucky holding you close. you turned kissing his cheek before sliding out of his grasp. you walked to the kitchen getting a glass of water before seeing a person sat out on the porch outside. 

You walk outside and sit next to him. “hey” tony said softly “how are you?” he asked. you nodded softly. “you probably have questions” you said looking at the porch floor. “I do but that's your story, your life, you'll tell me when you feel comfortable” tony said looking at you.

you gulped. you knew you owed it to him to tell him, after all you were having his child. “When my mom was pregnant, well it was like a ticking time bomb. Doctors said my life would be the end of hers. My father was not pleased with this development and decided him, as a scientist, could make a serum to stop that. He injected my mother with so many things and in the end i was born and she still died.” you started with sigh still looking at the floor “you don't have to” tony said. you shook your head “I want to” you replied. 

“when i was 5 my powers came to, couldn't control them soon as i touched my dad he'd do as i pleased. i asked for a teddy bear, threw a fit over it grabbed my dad's arm and all the sudden i got it. he was so confused as why he did that but nonetheless he couldn't stop. he started doing test on me, testing my blood, my saliva, my skin. saw the serum in my blood but not just in my blood in me all of me. then his goal was to make me as powerful as possible. He tried to make me be able to self heal. would cut me and shoot me. would torture me for days on end testing serum after serum on me. Was that way till fury took me in. They went to arrest him for abuse and neglect but he was gone lord knows where he is now. anyways it wasn't ever for sure if i was born this way not 100% but now...” you trailed off. tony looked you over seeing you holding in tears. he pulled you into a hug.

“It wasn't your fault.” tony said rubbing your arm. you pulled away shaking your head. tony grabbed your chin making you look at him “It was not your fault” he said more firmly. tears fell down your face. “thank you” you whispered. tony pulled you into another hug. 

he let go and stood up pulling you up. “you are an amazing and strong women you hear me? What he did to you is...I will kill him if i ever see him no correction not kill him but hurt him in ways he never imagined. what he did is not your fault.” he said and your turned away “y/n” he said and you turned back to him “your mothers death is not your fault.” he said. you nodded looking at the floor. “y/n look at me and say none of it is your fault” he said. you looked at him “i cant” you whispered. tony held your face in his hands “say it sweetheart” he said. “I cant” you said crying tears streaming down your face. “shhh its ok” he said hugging you.

You cried into his arms. he rubbed your back “some day you will” he said. you pulled away “i should...” you trailed off. he nodded “come on” he said putting his hand on the small of your back as you two walked in and to the hallway. “thank you” you said. tony gave a small smile “of course” he said and you looked around before walking back to your room.

Tony went to his room and layed in bed playing over the event of the night until he launched up from bed. He had come to one conclusion of himself. “shit” he mumbled. “i'm falling for her” he said falling back and rubbing his face groaning.

Tag list :)

@vicmc624​ @mylifeispainandiloveit​ @frostay​ 

[sp-ud]

Waking Up

AO3 Link

Inspired by this post: Link

And my own post about this concept: Link

Content Warnings: Panic Attacks, Memory Loss

Words: 1817

Ranboo suddenly finds himself back in reality with his hands in the middle of braiding his own hair. Not the worst thing he’s woken up to after Enderwalking. He lets out a sigh as he continues braiding his hair, eyes drifting towards the ceiling as he reflects on what he can remember doing while Enderwalking.

Wuh oh.

---

This is basically me sharing my theories about Enderwalking in fic format. That's kinda it. I took my theories, and wrote em as a fic.

I also posted this at 3am which is why it took me till 2pm to make a proper Tumblr post about it.

Ranboo suddenly finds himself back in reality with his hands in the middle of braiding his own hair. Not the worst thing he’s woken up to after Enderwalking. He lets out a sigh as he continues braiding his hair, eyes drifting towards the ceiling as he reflects on what he can remember doing while Enderwalking.

Wuh oh.

Quickly tying off the braid he grabs the memory book. Reading through page 13 again. “New table”? Axe feeling lighter? Eye inside a block? Eye that looks his? Now, Ranboo might not know a lot about his Enderman heritage, but he knows a portal when he's described one.

Lightly smacking his face, Ranboo tries to shift through the foggy memories he always has after Enderwalking. Memories where he feels like a passenger, not the one experiencing it. He… he was mining. Just chatting with those particles of his, when he came across an exposed stronghold. He went to investigate… finding the portal but not recognizing it in his Enderwalk state.

Ranboo starts to head downstairs as he digs through his memories more, he’d… he’d realized the portal would probably help with the experiments he did while Enderwalking but had left to build a lab another day.

… Has he already built the lab? Yes, he has. Replacing the stone walls with iron and setting up what he’d discovered as ‘the solution’ to Enderwalking. Without having to remember, Ranboo can already tell he hadn’t gone through with it while Enderwalking. Otherwise, he would have woken up in the lab. Or in his bed from respawning, after all, his Enderwalking self didn’t seem to realize some of the multiple flaws in his solution.

But Ranboo is too scared to correct his Enderwalking self. It’s already taken him ages to convince his Enderwalking self that he isn’t some evil dissociative state that committed war crimes he can’t remember. He doesn’t want to imagine how it’d go over trying to inform his Enderwalking state he has it backward.

Sliding down into his basement he quickly mines through the wall to get the experiment log he's written in Ender. Flipping all the way to the last page where he’s written the solution. He pulls out a pen from his pocket and holds it hesitantly over the page.

He knows how he is when Enderwalking. A paranoid anxious mess with less than half of his memory. If he sees this when Enderwalking, he’d freak out, he’d get suspicious, and then probably do it anyways.

Reluctantly, he hides the experiment log back away, sealing it back behind stone bricks. He has to tell someone he both trusts out of Enderwalk, and in Enderwalk.

Which is admittedly a short list of people. Phil would be good, but the old man would likely ask too many questions he doesn't know how to answer. Techno, while also a good option, is also currently hibernating. And would likely pass the message onto Phil.

Niki would be an option if the two crossed paths more often, and Tommy has so many issues of his own right now, he doesn't need Ranboo's. The particles, while well meaning, are honestly more of a nuisance who would likely just increase any suspicion.

Which only really leaves one other person, Tubbo. Who, while Ranboo loves his husband, still isn't the perfect option for this, is the best he honestly has.

Someone he trusts, who will listen, who will understand, and who'll actually be able to help. The only issue is Tubbo himself might want to experiment, Ranboo personally still is a little salty over the whole electric chair thing. But hopefully the moobloom-hybrid wilk put aside his scientific interests for the sake of Ranboo's wellbeing.

Not wanting to waste any more precious time he has before falling back into Enderwalk, Ranboo leaves his house as fast as he can after quickly snapping on his armor.

The journey to Snowchester is quick, one he likes to thinks he'd still know even if he had no memories. By the time the water tunnel has shot him back out, it feels like barely a minute has passed since he woke up.

Letting his enchanted armor drip off the water, Ranboo quickly starts towards the mansion where, if his memory serves him right, should be where Tubbo is currently.

"TUBBO!" He shouts as soon as he enters the mansion, yelling being the most efficient way to locate someone in the massive building. His long ears strain themselves to listen for a shout back.

"I'M IN THE UPSTAIRS GUEST ROOMS!" The ender-hybrid hears distantly, darting up the stairs as fast as he can. "THE ONES NEAR OUR ROOM!" Tubbo shouts once more, Ranboo quickly taking a left.

He almost bumps into Tubbo as the moobloom-hybird steps out into the hallway. Luckily scrambling to a stop just before bowling the smaller teen over. He rests a hand against the wall, somewhat hunching over as he tries to catch his breath.

"You good bossman? Something wrong?" Tubbo asks, taking a small step towards Ranboo. The taller huffs a few more breaths before holding his other hand up to tell Tubbo to wait a second.

"It's…" he starts, before taking a deep breath and straightening up, "It's… oh God, I was so focused on getting here quickly that um, didn't really think through how to explain this all…" his tail flicks restlessly behind him.

Tubbo hums to himself for a second, "This is a sit-down kind of thing, isn't it?" Ranboo gives a small nod, "Good thing I just set up yet another 'sitting area earlier today, come on," the brunette grabs Ranboo's hand and gently drags him further down the hallway before opening a door with dramatic flourish.

It's another room consisting of multiple sofas and chairs around a coffee table. The amount of rooms they have that look like this is honestly concerning, but at least Tubbo has enough eye for design that they all are clearly different. Much less confusing than the identical empty rooms Foolish left them with.

Ranboo all but collapses onto one of the couches, Tubbo taking a seat across from him. The brunette's mouth is twisting in worry, nose scrunching up as watches Ranboo through messy bangs.

"Okay," a sigh escapes the ender-hybrid, "I, I guess the best place to start would be… explaining my… condition?" He still isn't sure what the right term for Enderwalking is as there's next to no public documents on the topic. "So, you know how I have bad memory?"

A slight snort before a nod tell Ranboo to continue, "Well that's, that's just one symptom of my, condition. The Enderwalk. It's genetic, I'm pretty sure. There's uh, not much known about it," Ranboo starts messing with the furred tip of his tail, "But it's basically a, a state I go into? I guess? And it…" he trails off.

How does he explain to his best friend, his husband, that the 'him' he always interacts with isn't 100% 'him'. His mouth hangs open before snapping shut, shaking his head a little. Tubbo won't hate him for something out of his control, Tubbo is reasonable, he's smart, he's a good person.

Another glance at Tubbo shows that the moobloom-hybrid now has a serious look on his face, leaning forward, waiting for Ranboo to continue.

"It doesn't just affect my memory. It, it can affect my judgment, my reasoning. And it worsens with age," Ranboo focuses his gaze back down to his tail flicking in his own grasp, "and, don't get me wrong, I'm still me when Enderwalking I'm just…" he loses his words again. Letting a silence fall over the room.

"Okay," Ranboo looks up. Tubbo has a hand to his chin in thought. "okay, I get what you're saying. Plenty of species have illnesses like that," the ender-hybrid nods, "and I'm glad you told me but, why now?" A hint of light blue eyes peer through messy bangs, "did something happen?"

"More like… something's been happening but it's, it's close to becoming worse." He shifts on the couch, once again struggling to find the right words, "I'm Enderwalking all the time… I'd say that you uh, you probably see me Enderwalking more than you see me normally," he pauses to swallow. "When Enderwalking I, I dont realize I'm Enderwalking," a humorless laugh escapes him. "I don't even have half of my memories then. I managed to forget what Enderwalking even is! And somehow," his voice is starting to go static with anger, "I managed to come up with the name again, while Enderwalking, to explain my normal state!"

He hunches over, burying his head between his knees as he lets out static-filled laughs. His ears no longer hearing anything other than a growing buzz. Hands gripping and twisting his hair as his laughs start to devolve into something more like sobs.

A light weight settles over his shoulders and back, hands slowly unclenching his hair to drift down to wrap the blanket around himself. He feels a head rest itself on his shoulders, following the deep breaths he can feel carefully. His tail loosely wraps around a waist before small hooved finger tips start bruising through it.

"Sorry," he mutters. Tubbo hums, leaning his head more onto Ranboo's shoulder.

"Nothing to be sorry about, it sounds like… a lot," Tubbo says back, "You sure you want to talk about this now big man?"

The ender-hybrid nods, tilting his head to somewhat rest on top of Tubbo's, the smaller's dull horns pressing into his face. "I don't know when I'll start Enderwalking again, I have to tell you now before I forget again."

"As long as you're sure," Tubbo replies with a shrug, but Ranboo can still hear the concern under the layer of dismissiveness.

"When Enderwalking I've, starting to experiment on myself. It's progressively gotten more… intense, to put it simply. My Enderwalking self thinks he's found a solution, to stop from 'Enderwalking' but," Ranboo pulls back, doing his best to make direct eye contact with Tubbo, "the 'solution'? It's, I know what it's going to do! It will just make the Enderwalk worse. I'll probably be down to only a quarter of my memories! I might even, even lose a life."

Ranboo's eyes loss focus as his panic starts to build before he feels Tubbo's dull horns pressing into his chest and arms wrapping him in a loose hug.

"That's what you wanted to tell me, right?" Tubbo sighs, "you want me to make sure that you don't go through with it while Enderwalking?" Ranboo lets out what's supposed to be a hum that ends up sounding more like a buzz in response.

"Don't worry bossman, you can count on me," Tubbo tightens his hug and Ranboo can slowly feel the fog that comes with Enderwalking creep in.

"I know, I always know," he responds, before letting himself drift into the fog.

[amelialincoln]

I’m Okay Now

“Sorry, I’m here,” Amelia huffed, sliding into the booth beside Meredith and spilling the contents of her bag over the table. “Shit.” Mer laughed as she took in Amelia’s catastrophic entrance which was nothing out of the ordinary. Maggie took in the exasperated neurosurgeon’s appearance, frowning slightly.

“Amelia you’re--”

“Spilling out of my shirt?” She finished for her sister. “Yeah, I’m aware.” She grabbed the medical booklet that had flown out of her bag and held it up for them both to see. “I stopped taking the pill cause I’m looking at IUD options and my hormones are fluctuating like crazy.” She tucked her sore chest back into her bra that had become two sizes too small. “Did you guys order?” Maggie and Meredith shared a look that Amelia couldn’t recognize.

“We just got a bunch of things for the table,” Mer explained. “Maggie’s been waiting for you to tell us.”

“Oh, you didn’t have to do that,” Amelia’s breathing was still heavy, as if she’d run all the way from the hospital. “But I am intrigued, it’s not often that the three of us go out for breakfast to reveal some big news--”

“Winston wants me to move,” Maggie blurted out, tired of Amelia’s rambling. “He’s already arranged a position for me at his hospital. He wants me to leave Grey Sloan.” Amelia choked on her glass of water.

“What?” She exclaimed.

“Is that what you want?” Meredith asked at the same time.

“I mean, I don’t know…” Maggie sighed. “He never really took into consideration the idea of moving here. I mean I’m probably more highly regarded at Grey Sloan than he is at his hospital.” 

“Yeah you are. Girl power,” Amelia whooped, receiving a small smile from Maggie.

“I’ve just built a life here. I’m not sure I want to start over.”

“That’s your right,” Meredith added as their food arrived at the table. Amelia wrinkled her nose at the sight of bacon and pushed that specific plate away.

 “You love bacon and eggs,” Mer narrowed her eyes at Amelia’s disgust.

“Uh yeah, not feeling it right now though. Trade plates with me, Maggie? I’ll take the fruit.” Maggie raised her eyebrows but passed her the plate all the same. “So are you gonna do it?” 

Maggie sighed, “I mean I love Winston.” She spoke the words as if she were testing them out loud. “And that’s not something I say lightly.”

“We’d miss you,” Amelia interrupts with a mouthful full of fruit and receives a look of disapproval from Meredith.

“Well exactly.” Maggie smooths her braids. “I don’t think I could leave you guys behind.”

“Then you shouldn’t have to.” Meredith shakes her head.

“But then we’re stuck,” Maggie’s tone is exasperated, she’d run every possibility over in her head. “There’s no way to advance or grow in our relationship. Long distance is fine if it's temporary but what’s the point of all this if we don’t see an end goal together.” 

“Where do you see you both ending up,” Amelia asks. “In your perfect world.”

“Well he’d be here,” Maggie spoons yogurt into her mouth. “In my perfect world we’d be in Seattle.”

“Then you need to tell him that.” Amelia sets her fork down and is surprised to find Meredith nodding in agreement. “Fuck, I don’t feel good,” she muttered under breath as she steadied herself by pressing a her fingertips on the side of the table.

“For god sakes, Amelia, it’s because you're pregnant,” Meredith rolled her eyes. “For a doctor you could not be more oblivious.” Amelia’s eyes flew open in shock.

“It’s not...I’m not.” The tone in her voice was wavering. Maggie couldn’t help but stifle a laugh.

“Don’t sound so unaware,” Meredith teased, “I could name off five symptoms since you got here.” She expected the neurosurgeon to come back with a classic Amelia style response but instead she was lost in thought.

“Amelia,” Maggie’s voice was so quiet it was barely heard. “Is Link--”

“He’s away,” Amelia swallowed, hard, “in LA. Some pro athlete called him in cause he wanted the best. We haven’t talked about kids.”

“Well we can try and act as your big calm mountain until he gets back,” Maggie offered.

“Can we just get back to your thing right now?” Amelia pleaded, she avoided her sister’s looks of concern as she took a swig of her water and tried to ignore the fact that she wished it was the mimosa that Meredith was sipping on. Meredith’s phone buzzed on the table and the general surgeon glanced down before shoving the phone in her purse and gathering her wallet.

“That’s the hospital.” She looked at Maggie sympathetically. “We can finish this conversation tonight? Will breakfast on me make up for this?” 

“Mer it’s fine,” Maggie assured her.

“Wouldn’t complain though,” Amelia mumbled, receiving a glare from Maggie. Meredith set her card on the table and scooted past Amelia before heading hurriedly out of the restaurant.

“Are you sure you’re okay?” Maggie asked immediately after her departure, watching Amelia swirl her spoon around in her coffee. She’d already had three cups today and doubted the amount of caffeine was good for the situation she might’ve gotten herself in. “Cause I know you and Mer’s relationship is...complicated and if you didn’t want to talk about it with her I’m here.” 

“I haven’t taken a test, Maggie,” Amelia snapped, her tone harsher than she’d intended. Maggie sighed, leaning back in her chair. “Sorry, I’m just overwhelmed. I wish Link were here.”

“I know how that feels,” Maggie shrugged, handing Mer’s credit card to the waiter as she came to their table.

“That was insensitive of me--” Amelia began as Maggie held up her hand to quiet her.

“Let’s just get out of here.”

Meredith’s emergency surgery ended up being a twelve hour one. Amelia pulled off Ellis’ snow boots and smiled as the little girl ran off into the living room to play with her siblings.

“Hey Elle belle,” she whispered and motioned for the child to come back. “Since your teacher said you did such a great job on your math homework, you can pick what’s for dinner.” Ellis’ eyes lit up and she shrieked with excitement. Amelia winced as she felt her head begin to pound.

“Mac n cheese?” She asked.

“Sure, baby.” Amelia was relieved that she’d picked something so simple. Ellie wrapped her arms around Amelia’s legs in response, whispering that Amelia was her favourite aunt and to not tell aunt Maggie. To which Amelia rolled her eyes. “Nice try, you told her that she was your favourite aunt yesterday.” Ellis pressed a finger to her lips as if Maggie wasn’t at work and was listening in the other room.

“You’re my favourite aunt today,” she promised before running off once again. Amelia’s phone buzzed and Link’s face illuminated the screen.

“Hey,” she mumbled softly, “you just get off the plane?”

“Yep!” She winced at Link’s loud and cheery voice, wondering how he could always be so full of energy. “I was thinking of picking up some food on the way home. Do you have any requests?”

“Oh.” She realized she’d completely forgotten to update him on the last minute change of plans. “I’m not at the apartment. Meredith got pulled into a surgery and Maggie’s working the night shift so I’m watching the kids.”

“Okay, no worries.” He quieted down to match her tone. “Do you want me to pick up something and bring it there? We can put the kids down early and watch a movie.”

Amelia’s stomach turned at the idea of food. “I’m not really hungry but I’m up for a movie.” 

“Are you feeling okay?” He asked, not remembering a time where Amelia hadn’t been ‘up for food’. “I could pick up soup or something?” Amelia ran a nervous hand through her hair.

“Yeah, actually I need you to go to the store.”

“Okay, just send me a list, you know I’m no good at grocery shopping.” She could hear Link asking for a cab.

“No, Link, I need a--” she turned to see Bailey hovering over Ellis’ head with a pair of scissors. “Bailey! Don’t you dare cut your sister’s hair!” Bailey’s eyes widened, dropping the scissors guiltily. “I need a pregnancy test,” she practically yelled into the phone. Zola glanced up in confusion as her siblings carried on playing, completely unfazed. The other end of the phone was silent almost long enough for Amelia to check if they’d lost connection.

“Pregnancy test?” Link confirmed.

“Yeah.”

“Okay,” he swallowed. “See you soon.” He hung up quickly. Amelia tossed her phone away in annoyance and angrily filled a pot with water setting it on the stove. She didn’t know she’d begun to cry until hot tears were clouding her vision.

“Auntie Amelia?” Zola’s voice rang out beside her and Amelia jumped. “Are you okay?”

“Hey, sweetheart.” Amelia forced a smile, rubbing her eyes with her shirt sleeve. “Yeah, I’m all good.” Zola didn’t seem to take that as an answer, crossing her arms in front of her and staring up at her aunt patiently. Amelia sighed, pouring the box of Annie’s into the boiling water. 

“Are you having a baby?” 

“I don’t know,” she responded truthfully. “I’m not sure if your uncle and I are ready for that.” Despite her and Link not being married the kids referred to him as uncle so much that the title had stuck.

“Whenever Uncle Link braids Ellis’ hair he always says it’s because he’s practicing for when you and him have a kid,” Zola says this simply, as if it’s common knowledge. Amelia almost drops the plastic bowls she’d been retrieving from the cupboard.

“He said that?” 

“Like every time.” Zola rolls her eyes. “Are you making Annie’s?”

“Yes,” Amelia sighed, not wanting to hear any complaints from her niece.

“Good,” she wrinkled her nose. “Bailey likes Kraft Dinner but Annie’s is way better.”

“I hear nothing but facts.” Link’s voice surprises them. Amelia turns to meet his gaze. “Hey.” He holds a plastic bag in one hand and a duffle bag in the other.

“Uncle Link!” Zola runs to hug him, her squeal alerting the other two from their game in the living room. Bailey is throwing a bouncy ball at Link seconds later and Ellis follows him giggling. Link bent down to greet the three of them, allowing Ellis to wrap her pudgy fingers around his neck and kiss his cheek affectionately. Once he’s greeted each one separately, he moves to wrap his arms around his girlfriend, staring over her shoulder as she stirs the pasta slowly.

“You okay?” He pressed some tentative kisses on her neck as she relaxed into his embrace.

“All good,” she moved to strain the noodles before stirring in the rest of the ingredients and spooning the pasta into bowls. “Want some?” 

“I ended up picking up pizza,” he answered guiltily. “It was across from the CVS.” She ignored his attempt to bring up the test, instead calling out for the kids and handing each of them a bowl.

“You’re not hungry?”

“Nauseous.” She bit her lip worriedly, not wanting to meet his eyes. “If I eat I’ll throw up. Learned that this morning.” She glanced at the table instead. “Bailey, if I see you throw food at Ellis one more time I’m going to have a chat with your mother!”

“Annie’s mac and cheese sucks!” Bailey shot back with defiance.

“Well that’s unfortunate for you because tonight it’s your dinner.” Amelia shrugged.

“Irritable much?” Link had meant it as a joke but as he said it out loud he immediately regretted it. Amelia didn’t even look at him, no energy for a witty response. Instead she turned to the sink and started on the dishes. “I can do the dishes,” he offered.

“Can you just put them to bed?” She asked without glancing up from the soapy water. “I could use a minute alone.” 

She finished the dishes as Link dragged the squealing group of children up the stairs, knowing immediately by the ruckus that they’d convinced him to build a fort and he wouldn’t be down for a while. She finally brought herself to peek into the plastic bag Link had brought home. As promised, there were two pregnancy tests inside along with her favourite chocolate bar and ginger tea. She suddenly felt the urge to take it but the feeling quickly passed and she was left terrified. Instead she turned the test over in her hands, reading the instructions over and over in an attempt to distract herself.

“I read that ginger tea is supposed to help with nausea.” Link’s voice brought her back to reality and she looked to find him leaning on the doorway. “Meredith told me that you were feeling sick at breakfast.” Amelia raised her eyebrows. “I called her while I was at the drugstore. I didn’t know which test to buy,” he confessed. “I felt like she would know.” Amelia nodded, staring at the test in her hands. With the both of them being doctors she’d never felt more clueless.

“I didn’t get morning sickness last time.” Link raised an eyebrow, allowing her the space to elaborate but she didn't. They’d talked about Christopher once before but he’d still been left with questions.

“Do you even want kids?” The words left his mouth before he could stop them. “Do you want kids with me?”

“Yes,” she felt herself say immediately. They stared at each other for a while before she continued. “I was thinking more like adoption but here we are.” Tears burned at her eyes and Link closed the space between them immediately, wrapping his arms around her trembling body. They stood like that for a while until Amelia had straightened up and wiped her tears away, numbly making it towards the bathroom. Both tests confirmed their suspicion. To her surprise Link burst into happy tears, confessing how much he’d wanted this but had never wanted to push her and before she knew it they were both laughing and crying in each other's arms.

“Are we having a baby?” Meredith set her keys on the table as she pulled off her coat. Amelia was fast asleep on Link’s chest, exhausted from the emotional rollercoaster of a day.

“We’re having a baby.” Link’s beaming grin was illuminated by the tv and Meredith shook her head in amusement at the excitement he showed despite it being long past midnight.

sorry all I write is amelink pregnancy fics cause it makes me happy lol

[daydreamingatnight209]

Okay this is the final part of this series! I’m not sure about this one, I might end up re-writing this I’m not sure yet, but please let me kmow what you all think!

Hope you all like it, feedback is always welcome 💕✨

“Let’s have a baby” Part 3

Spencer Reid x Female Reader

Warnings - None, Fluff 💞

————————————

You were not a fan of change, it gave you anxiety and this was no different. There was a multitude of changes now that you and Spencer had a baby around the house. While you were recovering in the hospital, Alvez and Simmons had turned the spare bedroom in the apartment into a nursery for your son.

A couple of days after your birth you were discharged from the hospital and allowed to return home. You’d be lying if you said the first couple of weeks weren’t difficult. You didn’t leave Olivier’s site and spent most of your time in the nursery, enjoying the rest of your maternity leave. Admittedly, at first you struggled being back in the same apartment you’d been abducted from but Spencer (who also requested time off) reassured you that you were safe.

You wasn’t sure what to do when Spencer told you he had time off but you were glad your weren’t alone.

“Spencer what if the team needs you?” You question, after he first told you. You’d just put Oliver down for a nap.

“You need me more” he had replied, kissing your forehead.

Just like you hadn’t left Oliver, Spencer hadn’t left your side. He knew about after birthing symptoms. He did immense research while you were resting in the hospital. When Ollie was settled and you had some time together he would massage your lower abdomen and always made sure you had a heating pad ready.

Your Lochia (after birth bleeding - like a heavy period) had also begun so Spencer made sure you were stocked up on maternity pads. He was also your emotional support system as your emotions were still running high and all over the place. You were exhausted and slightly overwhelmed. It didn’t help that your appetite was almost non existent, yet Spencer was an angel.

He helped as much as he could so that you could catch up on sleep and didn’t mind when you would accidentally snap over something small. Instead he would just pull you into a hug and tell you he understood.

Your heart wanted to burst with joy every time you saw Spencer interact with Ollie, you knew he would be an amazing father from the moment you saw him with Henry, yet there was something about him having his own baby that made you feel some sort of way.

Spencer wasn’t fazed by the cries, the late nights, early mornings and dirty diapers.

When he eventually returned to work, he would call you any chance that he got, making sure you were okay and soon you fell into a rhythm.

———————

It took some time for you to get used to Spencer not being around the house and your son had picked up on it to, even at 2 months. Spencer had Informed you that there was no current case and was just sifting through uncompleted paperwork.

You missed the team and decided to surprise everyone.

You packed up your “baby go bag” and place Ollie into his stroller.

Penelope was the first to see you step foot on the sixth floor and she squealed when she saw her godson

“Oh my god he’s gotten so big!”

You give her a tired smile as you watch her run over, her heels clicking on the hard floor.

JJ was next to see you, wondering what all the commotion was about and had almost the exact same reaction.

“How are you doing?” She asks.

“Tired but we are working it out aren’t we little man” you answer, picking him up as a small wail suddenly leaves his lips.

You weren’t sure if Spencer could sense if something was wrong with his boy or if it was just coincidence that he entered the bull pen at that moment.

“Y/N? What are you doing here, is everything okay?”

“We just came to say hello Spence” you rush to inform him, watching his concern vanish from his features.

“He needs feeding”

Spencer takes Ollie and orders you to go lay down on the sofa in the briefing room. You protest but he promises that he has this under control.

The BAU team was in awe when they saw how Spencer was with his son, just like you were.

He sat at his desk and cradles the small baby protectively, watching as he sucked on the bottle, emptying the contents.

The team couldn’t take their eyes off the resident genius as he enters the burping phase, his son clinging to him, He walked about the office, bouncing Ollie gently, tapping his back, encouraging him to burp while mumbling a one sided conversation.

You watched the scene from the briefing room, Spencer unaware.

“He’s amazing isn’t he” JJ announces as she enters the room with a blanket and pillow for you.

He truly was, you couldn’t help but think that this almost didn’t happen, your anxiety almost winning when you first found out, but you were happy that you followed through.

Sites like this made everything worth it and were hoping one day you and Spencer would be able to do it all over again, just without the kidnapping scenario obviously.

At the end of the day, you and Spencer lay in bed, Oliver sleeping peacefully. Spencer looks at you with a small grin on his face.

“You know, I wouldn’t mind trying to make baby number 2”

Tag List- @purple-scarf-mistress @ladydansblanche @crazyforsstuff @theamuz @emygirl @thatsonezesty13 @aperrywilliams

[willadisastercry]

Space godzilla meets Keith and Pidge bonding moment

tw: depiction of paralyzation of the body and of throat/mouth

Of the list of terrifyingly dangerous alien monsters they’d come across, this one is near the top. After crash landing on an unfamiliar planet, the pair find themselves getting well acquainted with the local wildlife on their unexpected sojourn. They also get better acquainted with each other as they struggle against this beast and with the injuries from the battle that just keep getting more terrifying.

(((Keith and Pidge sharing emotional intimacy while one of them is hurt or both are is an ELITE trope and you cannot tell me otherwise)))

“GAH!”

“Are you sure you don’t need assistance?! I can probably get a hold of it’s tale with my bayard...”

“I’m good, just... this thing is relentless. It doesn’t have a single weakness except I don’t think it can hear well, that’s the only reason it hasn’t tried to eat you again.”

“Good to know? But let me help, Keith, you’re hurt too.”

“I’m still standing, am I not?”

“Your back is like shredded bud, it’s called adrenaline, ever heard of it?”

He opened his mouth as if to respond but didn’t get the chance to before he was launching himself over the swooping arc of the stinging tale that threatened to take his legs out from under him. His body stretched as he jumped and contracted almost as quickly to send himself tumbling forward, a stiff gasp escaping his lips when the stingers already at home in his back shifted and reduced him to a crouch while he rode the waves of agony that followed.

“That’s it...”

Pidge activated her bayard and sent it forward just as the tale of the oversized killer iguana was going back for seconds while Keith was still down, its struggle only aided the momentum of the grappling hook as it wrapped around the deadly appendage.

That bit was pretty seamless. What wasn’t seamless was when the creature started fighting her hold, a counter measure she hadn’t really planned for and wasn’t at all equipped to combat given she was very much reduced to sitting on her butt.

“Uh, Keith?” Pidge asked in a shriller voice than she intended as she dug one heel into the rocky soil beneath her.

“I know you’re like not doing great at the moment, but right about now would be a good time to, I don’t know, do the thing... that you do, ya know?”

The creature reared around as best it could with its tale entrapped and began yanking. Digging both heels into the ground was now all Pidge could do to keep from going flying. She couldn’t even hold back her screech when her torn muscles and slashed tendons protested that, the gash in her thigh squishing and swelling with another spurt of blood, whatever clotting that had been achieved entirely lost.

She almost cried out with relief she when heard Keith grunting and saw as he pulled himself up to his feet despite the burning twinge across the entire expanse of his back as well as his arms and shoulders, because Pidge was right, he did need to do the thing he does and end this.

“That’s a start, now I’m pretty sure what happens next is it gets more mad and seeing as i’m attached to my bayard still—“

But he didn’t need her to explain her predicament, he saw the danger immediately and lunged at the beast while it was still focused on attempting to wriggle free.

He knew aiming at its exposed underbelly was useless, the skin was too tough, but he also knew he couldn’t get close enough to go for a limb without risking getting sliced to ribbons by its claws. They had both found that one out the hard way.

So, with the beast temporarily distracted by Pidge he resolved to make a break for the underbelly anyway, the thing was huge but it’s limbs were short and set so far apart that if he could just slide under it and—

The next few moments happened in a blur. He did the thing without so much as a second thought, like he quite literally acted in whatever fashion his brain first thought of, too sluggish and dazed to afford waiting for something other than his instincts to come through.

The creature let out a horrible screech and bucked against Pidge’s grasp on its tale, she let out a strangled yelp as she was pulled forward and off the ground for a moment before landing back down hard. She heard Keith gagging as bright yellow acid oozed nearly onto his face from where his sword had pierced the only place he could think would be soft enough to bypass, clutching his nose at the acrid sizzling as it spluttered onto the dirt next to him.

“Pidge! On three retract your bayard, okay? One, two—“

“What? No, I can’t. It’ll—“

“Three!”

Keith picked his feet up as he hung on the sword stuck in what he assumed was the creatures gullet. It came away with even more acid blood as he dropped to his knees and tried to get out from under the stream, the top of his forearms being spared only by his armor as it disintegrated in a sickening hiss before his eyes. He managed to be vaguely concerned about wether it would stop at his armor before all of his worry went to avoiding being crushed to death as the beast took off.

Keith opened his eyes only when the thumping of the creatures claws began to notably shrink in the distance. He was curled up protectively on his side and too exhausted to move just yet.

“Huh, if only we had listened to Pidge earlier...” she mused teasingly as she pulled herself into a more comfortable sitting position.

“Shut up, are you alright? How’s the leg?”

“The leg is relatively the same, slightly more numb, started bleeding again, but still attached so that’s all that matters.”

She glanced back at the concerningly large puddle she’d left behind and the newly forming one underneath her. The blood loss wasn’t yet dangerous but she knew that could change rapidly if they didn’t get to Green soon. And for that she would need a functional Keith because she was fairly certain she couldn’t walk.

“Don’t think you can just deflect onto me, how’s your back you idiot?”

He thought deeply for a second, forcing himself to push past the impending haze as the steady stream of adrenaline coursing through his body began to taper off.

“Feels weird... the tingling and burning is starting to travel. Probably safe to say that the stingers have some sort of poison or irritant I guess... and it’s—oh my god it’s blood is—wait, crap!”

He wasn’t really mindful that he was rambling but grateful that it reminded him of the acid eating away at his armor and scrambled to detach what was left of it, scrubbing away what had just started making its way through his undersuit.

“It’s blood is WHAT?! Did it get on you?!”

“Yeah. Well no, I’m good,” he sighed and rolled around to sit up as painlessly as he could manage to.

“It ate my armor and I think my the hair on my forearm is gone, but my skin is in tact, well most of it. Sit tight though, I’m coming over there.”

“Kay, not going anywhere...”

Keith made his way slowly. His legs were leaden with excertion and whatever lovely substances the overgrown demon lizard stung and scratched him with seemed to only make it worse.

“Well you look awful.”

“Thanks, you too,” he said as he sat down heavily, his muscles screaming at the effort walking even a couple feet took and his head swimming for a moment.

“Rude, but turn around and let me see,” Pidge’s order was final but Keith’s body was slow, not really listening to what he wanted that well.

“Keith, I will slap you, stop trying to be a tough guy.”

He only managed to swivel sideways and lean the rest of the way to expose enough of his battered back to quell her chastisements.

“Hmm, the space-godzilla got you good,” she muttered as she pulled him closer to examine the bleeding gashes from the creatue’s claws and swollen welts from the barbs of its hellish tail.

Various bits of their armor had been knocked off by its claws and tail during the attack. For Keith, his chest plate had cracked after several blows and fallen off, which is why he was so bad off now.

There were three slashes starting from his left shoulder blade that made their way down to the middle of his back, all wide and jagged with blood leaking steadily from them, the skin around the wounds just as irritated as the welts from the stingers that trailed along in several lines up and down his back.

The skin around the gash on Pidge’s thigh fared the same though her symptoms had progressed more, the majority of her thigh swollen and blotchy with a tingling sensation that spread from her toes to her hips.

“Some of the stinger things are still lodged in your back... I think I should pull them out so ya know, no more of the toxin is released, that good with you?”

“Yeah whatever, just be qui—Oooh, okay—OH, ouch!”

Keith’s entire body tensed as she yanked the remaining stingers out, summoning another surge of blood from his scratch wounds.

“All done, sorry! I didn’t realize they were serated.”

“S’ okay,” he breathed through gritted teeth as blood began to trickle from the welts Pidge had just de-stingered.

“We’ve gotta get to our lions and contact the rest of the team before we start feeling the full affects of the toxin, do you think you can walk if I help you?” Keith asked as he was getting to his knees.

“My leg is pretty much entirely numb... I don’t know if it’s from the damage of the wound itself or what was coating the claw, but I can try.”

Keith got his feet under him and reached down to hook his arms under her armpits.

“Ready?”

Pidge nodded and he lifted her to her feet. She fought to stifle her groan when the skin around the wound was pulled and then tried to put her weight on it but it immediately buckled.

“Shit, okay. We can work something else out.”

“Sorry, I can probably hobble...”

“No hobbling when I have a spot just for you on my one remaining shoulder.”

“Huh? Wait, no!”

Pidge protested but Keith had no energy for it as he hoisted her up and over his good shoulder, her own mind not as hazy as his apparently because he now had a sense of humor. Keith never made jokes, but now he couldn’t stop. And it was freaking weird.

“Ugh, put me down!”

“Nope, sorry. Friendly reminder for passengers: please keep all hands and feet within the—“

“Oh my god, you’re delirious.”

“...maybe slightly, but you’re bleeding out so checkmate.”

Pidge wanted to slap him because that’s not how chess works, but grumbled instead and went to nudge him in the stomach with her knee but the movement jostled her thigh causing her keen at the way it burned, the torn everything that lay beneath pulling visciously.

She felt Keith’s hesitant hand hover over the back of her injured thigh before making his mind up and pressing it down against his stomach. She wailed because she couldn’t help it but was somehow able to rationalize his decision and be thankful.

Pressure, that was smart of him. Even in a state of literal delirium he had the presence of mind to do that because he was right, she was bleeding out. It hadn’t severed an artery but it likely nicked one with the way it had gushed initially.

“Th-thanks, hurts like a bitch, but thanks.”

“Anything for you, Pidge.”

She could almost laugh at how soft Keith was being, how open and lighthearted he was. The posion was admittedly closer to his heart and his brain which was probably why Pidge was more coherent though partially paralyzed.

Both injuries weren’t any better or worse than the other though. Pidge was very much in danger of losing too much blood and Keith was very much in danger of succumbing to adverse affects of the posion.

But she could hardly feel Green which meant they had a way to go still, it was less than ideal but of all people that would be able to get them there under such unfortunate circumstances, she was glad it was Keith with her. He was just as impossibly stubborn as she was and Pidge had no doubt that he’d do whatever he could to make it there in time.

“You know where you’re going right?”

“Yeah,” he huffed, already winded “crashed on the other side of this ridge... ha, course it’s up a hill, of course...”

“Stop as much as you need to if you need a break—“

“Nah, if I stop I don’t know if I’ll be able to start again.”

Pidge worried at her bottom lip, the skin already raw.

“Just let me know how you’re doing every now and then... since you’re so dead set on being my personal transport.”

He grunted at that and Pidge accepted it was as much of an answer as she was going to get. He walked for a while, the bounce of his gait and unrelenting pressure on her leg sufficiently shorting her dulled nerves for their tolerance for pain.

She could still feel the wound and how mangled the inside workings of her leg were, not even the numbing of the poison could take it away, but the tingling had traveled to her hip now and slowly made its way up her side. The feeling of Keith’s hand on the back of her thigh diminishing by the minute.

Pidge could only imagine how Keith was fairing with the numbness of the poison, she wondered if he could even feel her weight on his shoulder with how many pricks he’d received from the monster.

“Almost halfway up... this goddamned hill... can-can you feel Green yet?”

“Yeah, stronger than before at least. We’re getting closer. How do you feel?”

“Feel fine... i’m good,” he answered quickly, but his words were sloshing together somewhat, his pronunciation becoming lazier.

“Well, I can’t feel anything on my right side anymore except for my arm, so that’s lovely.”

“Hm, yeah... my back’s numb... scratches don’t hurt much anymore.”

“That’s probably for the best right now.”

“Yeah...”

The next few minutes passed slowly. Keith’s breathing getting heavier with the continued effort but no matter how much Pidge urged him he refused to even slow down for a minute let alone stop altogether to catch his breath.

So freaking stubborn, but she couldn’t blame him. She was the same way.

As they made their journey she found it more and more difficult to tear her mind away from worrying about the poison, what it could do to their bodies, if it was even curable. It could be lethal to humans and their efforts could very well be for nothing and they’d have no idea.

“Hey... you okay?” Keith asked, his voice gentle.

“Huh?”

“You’re breathing funny... wait, are you—don’t cry... we’re-we’re going to be fine, Pidge. Stop thinking about it...”

“I’m just scared,” her voice was meek, her chest shuddering as more tears slid silently down her face.

“I know... me too... but we’ll be okay... won’t let anything happen to you...”

“Okay...” she breathed shakily, her mind still working over her worries but also over the fact that she was so emotional, paranoid even, finally resolving it was probably another side affect of the poison.

She hoped that Keith didn’t get anxious like her, he’d gotten a stronger dose of the toxin and so she feared what paranoia would look like on him since he was already pretty delirious.

“Hey, Keith?”

He hummed, talking wasted too much energy and he didn’t much left to waste.

“I can feel Green a lot now, can almost hear what she’s trying to say. She’s stronger than when we left her, scared for me I think.”

“S’good... s’really good.”

They were nearing the top of the hill. Pidge could feel the elevation changing as the steep incline lessened and Keith straightened up with her, his breathing leveling and the muscles under her relaxing slightly, no longer straining to balance her while leaned forward.

“See her... see Green,” he spat with some effort. Words came a lot harder now, his mouth as dry as if it was full of cotton.

“She’s really worried... I can feel how scared she is...”

“Tell her... s’okay...”

“I will—hey slow down, we’re here, don’t waste more energy.”

“Can’ sl-slow...” he slurred like his tongue had stopped working. The dryness in his mouth extended down his throat and when he inhaled too sharply trying to articulate himself and choked, ragged coughs shaking his tiring frame.

“Oh, okay, don’t talk then. Just keep walking, you can rest soon.”

He only grunted this time, his breaths becoming as strained as they were when they were coming up the hill. He surged forward dazedly, his vision blurring slightly but he ignored it. They were so close, just a couple more yards and they’d be safe. Just a little further and—

“-eith, Keith! Do you hear that? Godzilla’s back and he brought friends!”

Keith hadn’t realized he’d zoned out in his intense concentration to get to Green before he succumbed to the numbness that seemed to cover every square inch of his body, weighing on his chest like a heavy cloud.

He heard it now though, the rumble of taloned appendages and the whipping of barbed tails.

Shit.

“How far are we from Green? Because our buddy from before and his friends are about a mile out, but they seem to be moving a tad faster than we are...?”

He didn’t answer, his legs moving faster than he knew he could manage with how nonexistent they felt, carrying them forward with reckless abandon as black dots danced across the quickly shrinking space between him and Green’s open jaws.

He couldn’t feel his feet hitting the ground, he didn’t even know he was running, he just felt the burn in his chest and the twinge on the skin of his back as he moved.

Pidge was saying something but he couldn’t hear her, he couldn’t hear much of anything anymore aside from the splitting ringing in his ears and pulse of his own heart as it pounded in his chest.

The alien beasts descended on them quickly, he was later told, and Pidge screamed her throat raw the entire time urging him to get them inside Green before they became dinner.

He wasn’t sure when he’d made it over the threshold of the lion or when he’d dropped to his knees to let Pidge down softly before falling forward in a heap.

“Damnit Keith, Green go! C’mon girl, I can’t fly-I can’t even move and Keith needs help...”

Once the pain in her leg died down from him abruptly releasing the pressure that was keeping the wound stabilized, she turned to her struggling friend, pushing away the fear that spiked as her own numbness encroached further.

He’d collapsed onto his front bonelessly and was wheezing like he’d just run a marathon with a punctured lung. It didn’t sound good and he didn’t look much better. The wounds on his back were angry, the skin puffy with hives and bleeding still.

If she didn’t know better she’d have thought he was having an allergic reaction and going into anaphylactic shock, but her wound looked the same.

“Keith?”

He didn’t respond. He didn’t even look like he’d heard her.

Pidge grunted in frustration when she couldn’t get her legs to bring her much closer to him, relying on her arms to physically move them as she awkwardly scooted.

She vaguely wondered how long it would be until she couldn’t sit up on her own as she lowered herself down to eye level and moved the damp locks that had fallen in front of his face away so she could see his eyes. They were bloodshot and unfocused as they darted about rapidly, his pupils blown entirely.

“I need you to breathe steadier for me okay? We’re in Green and we’re on our way back to the castle... you just need to hold on a little longer...”

Keith could see Pidge’s mouth moving and her hand on his head, but her words were lost on him and so was her touch. It felt like she was shouting across a void, like he was underwater and everything was garbled. He didn’t know why he couldn’t hear her, why he couldn’t feel anything.

He just knew he couldn’t breathe and that his head was going to explode.

“Catch your breath and calm down, we’re gonna be okay...”

Taking in air was a chore, like he was trying to fill up a balloon that had already popped. He couldn’t really feel his body beneath him as he struggled, he thought he could feel his throat closing though with how tight it grew.

“We’re gonna be fine... just keep breathing, Keith... even if it hurts... we’ll be okay...”

Pidge was saying these things mostly for herself now, Keith hadn’t answered her once since they’d made it to Green and she couldn’t even be sure he was conscious now. The numbness had spread to her middle, the muscles in her back and hips failing, reducing her to laying on her back.

For a while it had felt like it had stopped there until she tried to check on Keith and found her neck was immobile now too.

“No, no, no—fuck!”

That was when she’d started crying again. She was paralyzed. Her muscles were entirely lax, completely unresponsive to anything she tried to tell them to do. But her ears were unaffected. She would be able to hear when Keith stopped breathing next to her.

The poison had likely attacked his pulmonary system with the proximity of the wounds to his lungs, the claws maybe even knicked one. For Pidge it attacked her nervous system from the extensive damage to about a dozen crucial nerves in her leg.

She tried to curse pitifully again but the muscles in her face were tingling, managing nothing more than a nose wrinkle before she lost all control. The tears fell freely now. All she hoped for was a crackle over the coms from her friends when they got close enough to the castle to receive one.

Keith continued to wheeze, soon falling into an almost dream state as he struggled against the increasing paralysis in his mouth and throat, the decreased oxygen to his brain likely playing a hand in it.

He saw his home in the dessert except his father was there. He saw flashes of red and orange like fire and sand. They swirled around him threateningly, like they were taunting them. His father looked like he was saying something to him, but the sand whirred deafeningly.

“What?!” he thought he heard himself calling out through the wall of flames that seperated them. The blaze was tantalizingly close and gaining ground each second.

“Dad, what are you saying?”

The fire raged stronger now, the heat and lack of oxygen in the air around them as the flames licked it up bringing his father to his knees.

“No, no—Dad!”

Keith started toward the flames that were now receding, drawing toward his father who was still trying to tell him something.

But it was too late.

The flames circled him, closing in and swallowing him up.

Keith felt like he was the one burning as he saw his father taken away from him once more before darkness enveloped him.

“Dad...” he whispered in defeat.

The static that sounded from the coms device brought another surge of tears down Pidge’s face once Keith had stopped calling out and finally relaxed, his breaths choppy and sporadic but less erratic.

He was calling for his father, it was the first intelligent word she’d gathered from him once he’d started up. He sounded like he was crying too.

“-dge...-th...in...-idge-Keith...come in...guys? Please report.”

It was Shiro. He sounded scared.

“Pidge? Keith? Please tell us you’re okay...”

Hunk. Gosh, hearing him so worried hurt.

“Green has the other lions flipping their shit,”Lance remarked, trying to infuse some levity into his voice.

“Red is like actually wailing—wait, Coran sees you guys on the radar...”

She wanted to sob so badly, but her body refused. They were so close to being safe, to not feeling so wrong. She wanted to tell Keith it was going to be okay, that his father was gone but that he would be proud of him. That it’d be okay because he had his friends. And that she needed a hug as soon as he could breathe and as soon as she could stand.

But she just let her eyes flutter closed while Green landed them with a shudder that she didn’t feel. Everyone was on them in a second, worried voices pulling her from the darkness as equally worried faces hovered over her, poking at her leg.

“Pidge?! Pidge can you hear me?” Shiro was waving his hand in front of her but her face was entirely numb, her eyelids heavy and uncooperative but still functioning for now.

“That’s a lot of blood and—oh my god is that bone, aw god...” Hunk deadpanned before excusing himself to go hurl.

“What the heck? Her eyes are open and responsive but she’s not talking,” Lance noted as his mind worked over the strange scene.

Keith was still out of it, mumbling incoherently and breathing hoarsely. Coran was examining his back and figuring out a way to transport him without angering the wounds.

“I think I have an idea of what happened...” he offered once he’d inspected the swollen dots from the barbs and relayed his hypothesis to the rest of the team.

“Oh my god, so she’s like... paralyzed?” Lance questioned in horror.

Hot tears spilled down her face once more at their realization, Hunk appearing next to them and Allura coming into view as well.

“Pidge?” she asked softly, “er, blink twice if you can hear me?”

Blinking was difficult but possible, snapping her eyes back quickly each time just in case.

“Oh, Pidge...” she gushed sadly, taking her face in the palm of her hand.

“That must’ve been hell—I-I’m so sorry,” Hunk choked as he fought back a sob.

“We should’ve gone with you guys, I should’ve gone with you guys...” Lance griped defeatedly.

“No, I never should’ve sent you... it was too dangerous—“

“Er, Shiro? Could I get some assistance with Keith? Holding him like this seems to aggravate his breathing...” Coran interrupted as he sat with Keith against his chest after trying to carry him over his shoulder like he’d done with Pidge.

“Of course.”

“Rest now, Pidge. You’ve done more than enough,” Allura soothed, wiping the tears from her cheeks.

That was all the command she needed as she let the heaviness close her eyes for good. She felt herself become weightless before the tingling subsided into a pleasant nothingness.

The next thing she knew she was tumbling forward into warm arms, a familiar voice sounding not nearly as wrecked as it once had. She blinked back the haze from cryosleep only to realize that she just couldn’t see.

“These might help.”

She blinked with clarity once someone had put her glasses on for her, making her feel less disoriented now that she could actually see.

Keith stared down at her warmly.

“Hey there.”

“UGH!” she grumbled as she scrambled up and threw her arms around him, squeezing like she wanted to shatter his bones.

It wasn’t long before she was fighting the hysteria in her voice.

“Don’t scare me like that ever again! It was horrible! You-you were getting worse and I couldn’t m-move, I th-thought I’d have to hear... hear you...”

“Hey,” he said as softly as he spoke to her on that stupid planet, rubbing her back in an effort to quell the stuttering of her chest.

“I didn’t. We’re okay, just like you said we’d be...”

“O-okay,” she managed through sobs now that she could actually cry.

They stayed like that for a while which was surprising when she thought about it but she didn’t care to consider it in depth, that he was letting her hug him so long, that he was comforting her.

“How long were we out?” she asked after some time. It was probably night judging by the dim lights and lack of swarming that occurred. Keith was stubborn so she could imagine him refusing to let her wake up without greeting her first or some noble shit like that.

“Well I was out for like a day, not much to fix I guess. The slashes weren’t deep, not heavy duty work or anything. The poison paralyzing my throat however... was a slight issue. The pod stopped it before I like stopped breathing or whatever, but Coran said he had a plan for if that happened.”

Keith readjusted so that he held most of her weight more comfortably as she calmed down.

“You on the other hand, were in for three days, almost four.”

Pidge sat back from her home against his chest and underneath his arms to look at him with an amusingly bewildered face, needing to know every detail now temporarily overriding her sadness.

“Three days?! Why?”

“Well you did almost bleed out... and then there were the several muscles sliced clean in half as well as a few snapped tendons from said severed muscles... oh and the full body paralysis from a toxin that had to be flushed out... so yeah, took a hot second. And you’re not allowed to say I scared you because you scared me pretty well too.”

“Oh... sorry for scaring you.”

He pulled her back into his arms and she closed her eyes against the steady rise and fall of his chest, a much welcomed change.

“Your... your dad would be proud of you, ya know?”

She felt Keith stiffen against her for a moment at the mention of her father.

“What makes you say that?”

“It’s just—you were calling out for him... and I couldn’t comfort you, tell you that it’d be okay or that... well he’s not here, but we are...”

Pidge took a shaky breath ans Keith tightened his arms around her, his body no longer tense as she struggled to articulate her words through the hitches in her breath.

“It just hurt hearing you call for him like that and not be able to do anything... made me want my dad... I-I miss him too...”

She thought she heard his breathing pick up, felt him moving his hands to his face as he continued to rub her back. She didn’t care, just hugged tighter.

“Thanks... for that,” he said finally.

“Thanks for not dying before you saved us.”

“Ha, checkmate I guess.”

She laughed because that’s just once again not how that works and nestled herself somehow further against the warmth of Keith’s chest because... they were okay.

[whumphoarder]

Hello! I appreciate your blog so much! I was wondering: do you have any fic recs with fever/delirium?

Hoo boy, better sit down. This is one of my fave tropes. I have so many that they’ve gotta be under the cut: 

A little broken by @xxx-cat-xxx

A double sickfic with Tony trying to care for a flu-riddled Peter during his first year at college. Awesome whump and heartfelt angsty moments

you heal me like the light of day by @searchingforstarss

Peter hiding his injuries and them coming back to bite him in the ass. Super well-done whump 

Condiments can’t play doctor by 14million_constellations

Peter’s sick with food poisoning and also a bit delirious and Tony’s there. So in-character and I love our glimpse into Peter’s messy thoughts.

flushed away by darutias

Another awesome food poisoning fic with delirious Peter 

Peter Parker’s Day Off by @hiddenst0rms

Faking sick never pays off in the end. Enough said. Read this gem.

Make Way For Tomorrow by @tonystarkstan

This story is so much more than just a sickfic because it’s mainly about homeless Peter meeting Tony for the first time, but he falls sick in chap 7 and I love the descriptions and details so much

This B.S. Better Be Worth It by @losingmymindtonight

Tony is the adjunct professor at Peter’s college and finds him feverish and flu riddled in chap 3. Super realistic feel to it—read it so much times

If you’re still bleeding by @xxx-cat-xxx

Feverish, sick Peter getting emotional because of a movie and Tony doing his best, but being very Tony about it. Love this one 

Tensile Strength by sahiya

Peter down with the flu while staying at the compound and Tony Stepping Up™. I’ve read this one countless times and it never fails to satisfy—so much awesome caretaking!

And sahiya is actually a goldmine for really sweet fever fics, so I’ll also go ahead and rec:

Nursery School Hell Germs by sahiya

Peter and Tony both down for the count with strep and high fevers

Head Above Water by sahiya

Peter attempting to care for sick Tony and Morgan while Pepper is out of town and gettin a little in over his head

Leisure Sickness by sahiya

Peter repeatedly getting sick every time he tries to relax. I reread this one, like, monthly.

Wrap Me Up And Hold Me Close by @spider-man-stan

Feverish, sick Peter taking some ~creative~ measures to stay afloat. Love this concept and it’s a great mix of hurt and comfort and angst.

The Bite by bambirosesavage

Peter’s initial bite. No Tony, but the author really fleshes May and Ben out and gives them really believable and lovable personalities and so it hits exactly as it’s supposed to. One I’ve come back to many times!

round two by @caraminha

After coming back from the snap, Peter’s body experiences the spider mutation a second time, but this time with Tony and the team around as caretakers. SO. FREAKING. GOOD.

The Primary Reason Tony Stark Would Throw Down With an Anti-Vaxxer in the Street by @caraminha

Peter getting tetanus while on a road trip with Tony and Struggling™. So much comfort and angst.

In Case of Emergency by Bowtiez

Peter babysitting Morgan at the lake house and coming down with strep that wipes him out, but Morgan stepping up to the plate in a creative way. Adorable

Never Gonna Let You Down by @justme–emily

Another fantastic Peter getting sick while babysitting fic, but taken a different direction when Morgan reaches out for help. I honestly can’t get enough of this trope

Night Before Christmas by Desirexwolf

Sleepy sick Peter at the lakehouse with a fever and Tony being all Dad™

Chills by peterparkr

Peter wakes up with a fever. Tony does his best. I love how awkward and believable Tony feels as a caretaker here.

Chemical Delirium by @midsommersolstice

Peter exhibiting some concerning symptoms and it all going downhill fast. Love the creativity in the concept here 

My Spirit Is Too Weak (Weighs Heavily On Me, Like Unwilling Sleep) by @seek-rest

So much whump. This one will fuck you up, man. That’s all ima say.

blankets and brain melting fevers by @hailing-stars

Adorable Worried Dad™ Tony doing his best.

Peter gets the chickenpox by snarkymuch

Peter and Morgan both catch the chickenpox. Morgan’s case is mild, but Peter’s is severe. Tony takes care of them both. So much comfort and caring and I love Morgan’s characterization

Fevers, fears and falls by @wolfypuppypiles

Peter not accepting that being sick comes with limits and he probably shouldn’t be swinging around the city like a dumbass

Temperature by @sickficlurker

Peter having to ditch a field trip to get picked up by Tony due to feeling bad. Super sweet

Delirium: A State of Mind by deebainwonderland

Peter being super out of it and Tony helping him through

Living Nightmare by @marvelous-writer

Peter has a horribly vivid fever dream that Mysterio is back from the dead, threatening the safety of his family. Angst and comfort.

sick day by aloneintherain

“Friday, does he have a fever?”

“Oh my god,” Falcon says. “What kind of hellscape did knock-off Harry Potter throw us into? Are you parenting him right now?” - this summary says it all tbh. So much snark and concern

And then @awesomesockes and I have our share as well:

Of Fevers & Thankfulness 

Peter comes down with mono just before Thanksgiving.

Five Times Bruce Banner is Not That Kind of Doctor™ + One Time He’s Perfect For the Job

Bruce Banner is not a medical doctor. Except for when he needs to be. (Peter’s chapter is #2.)

And my solo offerings to this party:

Dad Level: 3000 

Peter comes down with the flu while visiting the Stark family (and Happy) at the lake house during his spring break from MIT. Thankfully, Tony has been spending the last five years honing his Dad Skills™. He’s got this.

Long Distance Dadding

Peter gets sick while babysitting Morgan at the lake house and Tony is a Worried Dad™ about it.

…And I’m sure there’s more but this list is already absurdly long, so I’ll cut it off now. Hope you enjoy!

[drariellevalentine]

Medically Inevitable

Chapter 8- Glamorous Girls’ Night

Warnings:- Very mild cursing, alcohol

Characters:- Arielle Valentine, Sienna Trinh, Ethan Ramsey, Naveen Banerji, Alyssa Raines, Kyra Santana, Ines Delarosa, Jackie Varma, Arabelle Raines

Pairing:- Ethan Ramsey x Arielle Valentine

Arielle’s PoV:-

You wake up to Sienna's calls which by the time you go to pick up ends. Yawning you rub your eyes and reach for your phone. You unlock it to find seven missed calls and innumerable texts from Sienna.

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“OMG Si! I’m sooo sorry!! I didn’t see your texts at all! Please forgive me!!🥺🥺🥺”, you text back.

"..Fine. Only cause you're my bestie. Now I'm calling you, you're going to answer and tell me word for word of what happened yesterday night as punishment!" She texts you back almost immediately.

"Deal! Just give me a few minutes.", you reply. Getting up from the bed you reach for your bag to take out the things that you need. After brushing your teeth and then combing your hair you unlock your phone again. Going through the contact list you stop at Sienna's number and video call her. "Hi!" Sienna greets you excited.

"Hi," you say.

"You've got a lot to say Ari. But before that, everything is okay, right?" Her concerned voice asks.

"Yes, everything is fine," you smile at her concern.

"Good! Now I need all the details about the "work" you were doing that kept you so busy that you couldn't even reply to my texts or pick my call." You roll your eyes even though she can't see.

"The "work" I was doing was finding out what's wrong with my godfather. And I couldn't reply because I was sleeping."

"Ooh! "

"What "ooh!"?"

"Sleeping with your... " She doesn't finish the sentence but you don't need her to, you already know what she's saying.

"God Si! He's my boss!" She snickers.

"And I’m in his guest room, he's in his room!"

"I know Ari. I was just teasing you. You don't need to explain things to me."

"I know."

"But I need all the details though. What you talked about, even Dr. Banerji's symptoms and what diagnosis you guys made. Everything!" "Fine!" I start filling her with Naveen's condition and the diseases we ruled out.

"That's all?" She asks after I am done.

"Yeah...Why?"

"Medicine can't be the only thing you talked about..."

"Si," I try to warn her to stop teasing me.

"C'mon! There must be something!"

"Umm... his dog? He's so freaking cute! I almost tripped while watching him," you start saying. Well, correction, I tripped while watching him," you laugh.

"You tripped? And you are telling that to me now! Are you hurt?" Sienna switches to mother hen mode.

"Calm down Si! I sprained my ankle slightly but that's it."

"How badly did you injure yourself?

“I think I injured myself quite bad? I couldn't even walk properly, don’t worry it’s fine now! Dr. Ramsey had to carry me inside-" you abruptly stop realizing what you just said. You see Sienna's smirk growing wider.

"He did what?!" She asked surprised.

"Nothing."

"Arielle!"

"Sienna!"

"Ari!"

“Fine! He was just helping me okay?”

"Sureeee!" She says in a teasing voice, " I mean obviously bosses invite their interns to their home and then carries them inside like their bride!”

"Sienna!" I exclaim in a shocked voice and she laughs. You both talk for a little while and then wave goodbye. After ending your phone call with Si, you head out to the empty living room. “Hmm...he must be sleeping. Thank god, or else he would have heard everything!” You open the fridge and spot a bottle of almond milk. You pour yourself a glass and just try to relax, but can’t. Yesterday’s events keep running through your mind until you can’t take it anymore. You wash your glass and keep it aside when you spot a yoga mat tucked away in the corner. You go to your room and get dressed in the simple grey and black outfit, pulling your hair into a high ponytail. Wearing your AirPods, you play a playlist of tunes and head out to stretch. You start with slowly stretching our your entire sore body, making sure not to put much weight on your ankle. Starting with a few simple positions, you slowly work your way up to the harder ones. Pulling out your phone, you quickly set a timer and flex yourself into another position, just as the flash goes off. You quickly post it on Instagram.

Ethan’s PoV:-

You wake up to the alarm you set for 6:45, brushing and flossing your teeth. You pull on a dark grey v-neck and head out with a half-asleep where you see Arielle in a very twisted, complex position. Not knowing why, you find yourself mesmerised by the fluid way she moves her body from one position to the next. She arches her back and kicks her leg up, twisting her head to the side when she sees you leaning near the doorframe. Letting out a small yelp of surprise, she quickly brushes herself off, taking off her earphones and heads towards you. “Good morning! I didn’t see you there.” You can’t but help trail your eyes over her body, skin-tight leggings and all. She doesn’t seem to notice as she focuses her attention on Jenner.

“Hey, boy! Looks like somebody’s sleepy!” She looks up at you. “I hope you don’t mind, I grabbed a glass of almond milk from the fridge. You were sleeping and I didn’t want to disturb you.”, she says as she scoops him into her arms.

“That’s quite alright. You do know I have a treadmill here right? You can use it if you want, there’s also some other equipment here.” You lead her to an open but tucked away place where you’ve set up all your equipment.

“Join me.”, she says.

“I will.” You head to your room and pull on an outfit and find her using your old treadmill, talking to Jenner at the same time. You’ve never seen Jenner get along with someone this quickly.

“I don’t know why you bought a new one. This is perfectly fine.”, she says as she notices you enter.

“For your height, yes. The handlebars are quite short.”

“Hey! I can’t help it that I’m short! Plus, you’re 6’4”! That’s as tall as a basketball player!”, she says ridiculously. You laugh as you start running on the new treadmill beside her. In 30 minutes, both of you have worked up a good sweat and appetite.

“Okay, I’m done! I’m going to take a shower and then we’ll make something for breakfast.” She heads off to her room as you finish off yours and jump in the shower. After getting dressed and drying your hair until it’s damp, you head into the kitchen to find her climbing on top of the kitchen counter. She’s dressed in a very short hoodie and jeans...or leggings, you’re not quite sure.

“What are you doing?!”

She turns around as she shouts, “Don’t sneak up on a girl like that! I’m trying to grab that pan. Why do you keep everything up so high?!” Laughing, you grab the pan from the shelf with ease and hand to her as she gets down.

“You do know how to cook, right?” She gives you an incredulous look.

“I’m making banana French Toast. Is that okay? I mean you have all the ingredients.” Thank god she isn’t making pancakes.

“Okay, So what’s your recipe?” She gestures to a spread of ingredients. “I need two bowls, a fork and a electric whisk.” You pull out everything from the cabinets and hand it to her. “Okay, first we’ll start with the eggs.” She cracks a few into the bowl and whisks them vigorously until they turn pale yellow and frothy. “Now the sugar and butter.” You hand her the softened butter and sugar. Without measuring, she adds them into the eggs.

“No measuring?”, you ask.

“Naveen.”, she nonchalantly responds as she beats the mixture. You recall the times of when he would cook, never using any type of measurement.

“That man despises measuring cups.”

“Tell me about it! Him and my cousin have debates about it every single time they meet. My cousin’s a professional chef. Now, hand me those ripe bananas.” Handing them over, she quickly peels and mashes them together, adding a lot of vanilla extract. You raise an eyebrow.

“It tastes much better! Now the milk, just enough to thin out the batter.” You hand her the carton of milk. She incorporates it into the batter. Then picking up the bowl of eggs, butter and sugar, she carefully folds it into the banana.

“Okay, done! Now, hand me that pan.” She turns on the stove and adds just a touch of butter to the pan. “If you add too much butter, the bread will become too soft.” She takes a slice of bread and submerges it into the batter. Holding it for a few seconds, she places it onto the pan. Making about 5 pieces while you put away all the ingredients and brew coffee, she places two in one and three in another.

“Do you have chocolate or maple syrup?” You hand her both of them. She pours a little to yours while adding a lot to hers, bringing both the plates to the dining table, along with the coffee you brewed. Jenner starts sniffing the plates.

“No, no, no. Those aren’t for you, they have chocolate. Let’s go get you some food. Where you you keep the dog food?” You pull out Jenner’s food and set a bowl of food and water for him, then go sit down with Arielle.

She pushes the plate with 3 slices towards you. “Try it! It’s one of my special recipes.” You take a bite and you try not to show any emotion. Lord, that is good! “So...how is it?”

“It’s adequate.” She laughs as she takes a bite. Both of you start eating when suddenly her phone rings, Jenner starts barking.

She bends down, “It’s okay, boy. It’s just this.” She shows him her lit up phone. “Do you mind?”

“Not at all.”

Arielle’s PoV:-

You open your phone and see it’s Elijah. “Hey Elijah!”

“Where the hell were you, Ari! We were worried!”

“I’m so sorry! I’m at.. my friend’s house right now. I told Si though.”

“Yeah, I know. She tried calling you but you didn’t answer yesterday. Anyways, apparently you left your shift early yesterday? What happened?”

“Oh that. I wasn’t feeling well and Ines sent me home, I’m fine though now. I ended up twisting my ankle so I couldn’t drive home last night. I’ll be at the apartment in an hour.”

“K, see you.” You hang up and turn to Ethan where you find him finishing his plate. “Sorry about that. My roommates were wondering where I was. Sienna covered for me so I’m fine.”

“Why didn’t you tell me that you left your shift early?” You wince, completely forgetting what you told him.

“I didn’t exactly want to explain, plus I’m fine now.” He nods.

“How did you all get an apartment together, did you know each other before?” You recount the story of what happened as you finish off breakfast. After helping him with the dishes, you go to your room and pack all your stuff and head towards the door as Ethan follows.

“I had a nice time, although I wish we had met by Naveen introducing us. Probably would have saved me that first dressing down.” You notice a flash of regret in his eyes. “But I still don’t mind how we met.” You wave as you head down to your car, driving towards your apartment. You find Elijah, Sienna and Landry on the sofa, watching a movie. “Hey guys!” They turn to look at you.

“Where were you?”, Landry asks. You’re careful not to give away anything.

“My friend was visiting from Chicago, I went to see him.” You drop your stuff and sit near Sienna, as you watch the movie.

“So...what happened this morning?”, she smirks.

“Nothing! Now shut up!”, you say playfully, but quietly.

A few hours later, you, Sienna and Jackie are lounging on the sofa after lunch. “Guys, I’m bored and burnt out from studying. Let’s do something.”, Jackie says.

“But what? Elijah and Landry have gone to another baseball game for a guys’ night with some of the surgical interns.”, Si says. An idea strikes you.

“Guys, what if we have a girls’ night?! We could have a spa day! What do you say?!”

“That’s a great idea! But who do we invite?”, Si asks. You think.

“Let’s invite Kyra and Ines. I’ll go see if Phoebe’s in. And... I think Alyssa’s in town.”, you say.

“Who’s Alyssa?”, Jackie asks.

“My sister-in-law.”, you reply.

“OMG! Do you mean Alyssa Raines? The fashion icon of all time!?”, Si bursts. You nod.

“Yep! And I think she might bring Arabelle along too.”

Sienna shrieks, “This is going to be so much fun! Right Jackie?!” She rolls her eyes.

“Okay, So I have a bunch of products for whipping up masks and scrubs, so I’ll get them out and start organising after calling Alyssa. You two see if Kyra, Ines and Phoebe are up for it. It’s 3 right now so...tell them to come over at 5.” Both of them step outside the apartment to call Phoebe.

You go into your room and call Aly.

“Aunt Arielle! Hiiiii!”, she shouts. You can hear Aly shouting in the background to give the phone to her.

“Hi Belle. Can you do Zia a favour and give the phone to mommy please?”

“Okay!........Hey Ari!”

“Hey Aly, I was just wondering if you were in town. The girls and I were planning to do a spa day. Do you want to join?”

“I don’t know...I need someone to watch Belle”-

You cut her off. “You can bring Belle along. So, it starts at 5. Can you make it?”

“Umm...let me check.” You hear her talking to one of her assistants. “Yeah, I’ll be there. Do you want me to bring anything?”

You think. “Well...it would be nice if we all had matching robes. I’ll send you the address.”

“I should have something in the warehouse. I’ll see you at 5. Bye!” You hang up and turn around to find Si and Jackie entering.

“So, Phoebe is out of town but Kyra and Ines are coming.”, they say.

“Great! Aly’s coming with Belle and I asked her to bring us all matching robes. So that’s...6 ladies and Belle.” You quickly shoot Aly a text and turn to them.

“Okay, so we’ll need to set up an area, arrange everything and probably make some refreshments.”

“Ooh! I saw these really cute pizza bites on Insta yesterday! I’ll make those and lemonade...and then get out some snacks and make something sweet.”

“Si, that’s a lot. You sure you don’t need help?”

“Nope! I’ve got it!” She heads towards the kitchen, a bounce in her step.

“Okay, So we’ll set up in my room.” You start clearing up space in your huge room, layering blankets and pillows.

“Okay, so I’ll get out some towels, mirrors & bowls and you arrange them, Jackie.”

“She arranges them as she asks you, “You’ve done this before, you’re quite good.”

“I host most of the holidays and celebrations at home.” You open one of your cabinets, revealing boxes and shelfs full of beauty products.

“My god, Arielle! How much do you even have? No wonder your skin is so clear.”

You laugh. “There all my godfather’s secrets. His Indian heritage held so much information about natural skincare, and I’ve been interested since a very young age.” You pull everything out and arrange it on your bed.

“I mean I’m Indian too, but I don’t do any of this, but maybe I should. Wouldn’t hurt to have a little bit of natural beauty.”

“...that’s everything! Let’s go help Sienna.” You both head to the kitchen, a mouthwatering smell wafting from it. After an hour full of prepping, the doorbell rings. You open it and a tiny but strong force collides with your legs. You look up to see Aly standing there, behind her Ines and Kyra.

“Aunt Arielle! Hi!!!”, she adorably says making everything laugh. You scoop her up into your arms and give her a kiss on the cheek.

“Hey Aly!” She gives you a hug.

“Long time no see, Dr. Valentine.” You smile as you lead them inside. “Nice place.”, Aly says.

“Hey, Doc. You never told me you were famous, I mean the Alyssa Raines is your sister-in-law!” You all laugh.

“Well maybe I could have if you had stopped teasing me.”, you counter.

“Hey Arielle, are you feeling better now?”, Ines asks.

“I told you already that day itself, I’m fine. But thank you for asking!” You introduce everyone to everyone and lead them inside.

“Here Ari. I brought the robes you asked for.” Aly hands everyone the robes and everyone gets dressed.

You notice Jackie tense up when Belle walks near her. “She’s really sweet, Jackie. Just talk to her.”

“Hi! What’s your name?”, Belle asks.

“Jackie.”

“Ooh! That’s a really cool name.” You see Jackie’s eyes flash with surprise as she starts to warm up to her.

“So, why didn’t you get dressed like everyone else?”, Belle asks.

“Because I don’t like to wear them.”

“Aw! Why not! You would look really pretty! But you would look pretty in anything, like my mom and aunt.”, Belle responds. You see Jackie laugh as she leaves to go get changed. Soon everyone is changed and sitting on the makeshift area.

“Okay! Let’s get started! First, get into pairs.”, you say. Kyra picks you, as Aly and Jackie pair up. Sienna and Ines also pair up.

“I’ll help everyone with whatwever they need! Mommy has one, I forgot what they’re called.”, Belle says as you all laugh.

“They’re called an assistant, Belle.”

“As-ashis-...I’ll just help!”, Belle says as you all burst into laughter, again.

“She’s adorable Alyssa! How old is she?”, Ines asks.

“She turned 5 a few months ago. Although sometimes she can act like she’s much older, sometimes.”, Aly replies.

“Okay! We’ll start with hair, taking turns and later rinsing it off in the tub. Okay, so what kind of mask do you all want?”, you ask. After a short discussion, they each decide on a hair mask. You grab the bottle of your coconut hair mask for hydration for you & Kyra, a hibiscus one for hair fall for Si and Ines, and an almond and vitamin E for shine for Jackie and Aly. Everyone settles down and starts.

“You sure know a lot about this stuff.”, Kyra says as you massage the mask into her hair, placing a towel on her neck.

“It’s an interest of mine.”

“Well, if the doctor thing doesn’t work out, you can always turn into a spa worker. Although I’d have to find you a new nickname.”, she says.

“What nickname?”, you turn to see Jackie, Aly massaging her scalp.

“The female version of McDreamy!”, Kyra says. They all burst into giggles.

“Let’s play some music!”, Belle says.

“Great idea, Belle! Can you play some songs from my phone?” She unlocks your phone and plays the playlist you tell her to.

“Ines, there’s a speaker right beside you. Can you turn it on?” She turns it on and music starts blasting. Everyone starts singing but you keep quiet.

“Aunt Arielle, why aren’t you singing?”, Belle asks.

“That’s cause if she sings, we’ll all sounds like giraffes. No offence.”, Jackie says.

“Really, I’ve never heard you sing. If you can sing that well, then I’m making you sing one of Ariana’s songs.” She changes the song to “One Last Time” by Ariana Grande.

You start belting out the first few lines, as others start to join in. By the time you’re finished with the song, your voice is winded.”

“Damn girl, you’ve got pipes!”, Kyra says.

“Why, thank you.”, you say. All of you sing together as you finish up each other’s masks. “Is everyone done?” They all nod.

“Okay, now Jackie and Sienna, go to your bathtubs and fill them up with cold water. Then wash them with the shampoo and conditioner I’m giving you. Whoever did their mask first, wash your hair first.” You hand out all the respective soaps and towels to everyone, then lead Kyra to yours.

You plug the bathtub then turn on the water.

“Okay, So lean your head back after sitting on the stool.” She does as you say.

“So, I guess you’ve been doing this for a long time. I mean like taking care of your hair and skin.”

You nod. “I have. It’s something that my godfather taught me. My hair was always really long and thick, and I always loved taking care of it. Especially when I hit that teenage age, the tips he gave me are still so useful.”

“Oh! I remember when I hit mine, it was horrible. Braces, acne...”, she shudders.

You laugh, “Well look at you now. All done!”, you ring out her hair carefully and wrap it in a towel.

“Okay, now you sit down.” You sit down and flip your hair. She starts massaging and pouring water, cleansing your hair.

“Mmm...That feels good.”

“Your hair is so long! How do you even maintain it! I tried but my hair ended up looking like a bush by the time it got longer than my shoulders!”

“I’ve trained and took care of it from a very young age. My mother died when I was a baby, and my father always said that I always had my mother’s hair. I don’t know, it just feels right...like I’m making her proud when I do something for my hair or skin. I know that sounds silly.”

“It isn’t, it’s quite sweet. But it’s hard not having a mother.”

“It is. But luckily I was fortunate enough to have other amazing people in my life.” She wraps your head in a towel and you both head out to your room where you find the rest of the girls.

“All done?”, Si asks.

“Yep! Now it’s time for facials!” All of you spend hours pampering yourself, occasionally snacking and having a few flutes of champagne, giving Belle lemonade. By the time you’re all done with your facials, hair, nails... it’s around 8.

“Wait! I want to take a picture! Everyone pose!!” Everyone poses on your bed as Belle clicks a photo. You post it.

“I had so much fun! We should do this again sometime.”, Ines says. “Definitely! Next time, you’re all invited to my house.”, Aly says as Bella yawns. “Looks like someone’s sleepy.”

“Well I’m not! Does anyone have any plans for tonight?”, Jackie asks. Everyone shakes their head.

“Oh! What do you guys think of going out, to a club?!”, Kyra says. Everyone nods in agreement.

“I don’t know...I need someone to watch Belle..”, Aly says.

“I have the perfect person to watch Belle. Can you guys start cleaning this up?” You lead Aly outside.

“We’ll drop her later at Naveen’s.” You remember Ethan saying that he takes Naveen home to his apartment after his last shift.

“You two reconciled!? I’m so happy for you two! Finally, my favourite father-daughter duo is back together!” You laugh, careful not to spill anything about Naveen’s condition. “We did.” You enter your room. “Okay, that’s sorted out!”

“I didn’t bring anything to wear!”, Kyra exclaims.

“Neither did I!”, Ines agrees.

“Calm down! I’m right here and you people are worrying about club outfits! Hmm...what do guys say to a quick trip to one of Flair’s stores here? We’ll all pick out an outfit and I’ll get one of the stylists to do our makeup!”, Aly says as everyone cheers.

“Woo! Girls’ night, Girls’ night, Girls’ night!”, Sienna chants as everyone joins in.

“Okay! Let’s go!” After taking a cab to one of Flair’s branches, you all enter the huge ritzy store, Aly staying behind for a phone call.

“Arielle, what a pleasant surprise! Are you hear to model the new autumn lingerie collection?”, Sophie, Aly’s assistant and one of your friends.

“Not today, but I might come in later when I have time. So, my friends and I are hitting the town and we need the sexiest outfits! Aly’ll be here in a sec.”

“Awesome! I’ll go get everyone a stylist and you know about Flair’s collections so you tell the stylists for what line to look in.” She calls a bunch of stylists. You direct one for each person, “Okay, for Sienna, Ines and Kyra, the Sweet but Sexy line. Then for Jackie, Leather & Lace. For me...surprise me, Sophie. You know my style better than me.” Everyone heads off in different directions as Aly comes in with Belle.

“Let me guess, Ari wants you to pick her outfit?” All three of you laugh. “Okay, I’ll go find something. Belle, will you help me?”

“Ooh! Yeah, mommy! Aunt Arielle, wait for me, I want to pick your outfit too!” She skips off, Aly following her. “Okay, I might have just the thing for you.” Sophie leads me to a dressing room and tells me to wait there. You’re scrolling through your messages when your phone chimes with a new one from Naveen.

Sophie knocks and hands the dresses to you. You put them aside and reply. After texting, you quickly eye the dresses and try them on. After much deliberation, you pick two same dresses of different colours. “Ughh! I can’t decide!” Suddenly the door whips open, revealing Belle.

“I helped mommy pick out an outfit! Do you want any help?!”

You hold up the velvet dresses, one in baby pink and the other in wine red. “Which one is better, Amorina?”

“Uh...I like the red one cause you can wear matching red lipstick with it! You look really pwetty with red lipstick!”, she replies.

“Then, red it is! Can you wait outside for a minute?” She goes outside and you slip on the dress and half-coverage bra that Sophie gave you. Stepping outside, you ask her what she thinks.

“You look preeeeety!” You giggle.

“I’ll go do my makeup and then I’ll go drop you off. Guess who’s babysitting you?”, you ask. She shrugs.

“Grandpa Naveen is.” She cheers. “Now, do you want to help me in choosing some accessories?” She nods and runs off. “She has sooo much energy. I wish I had the energy of a 5 year old. My shifts would be much easier!”, you think as so run after her. You find Si and Ines standing there. “Hey!”

“You look beautiful!”, Ines exclaims. Si agrees.

“Thank you!” Just then Belle runs with something in her hand and hands it to you. It’s a gold, multi-layer body chain. “You really are your mother’s daughter! It’s beautiful!”

“Yay! Try it on, try it on!”, she exclaims. Si steps forward and helps you with the chain, securing it in place. You look in the mirror, it looks amazing.

“Ari, give me your phone!”, Si says.

“Why?”

“Cause you look really sexy right now and I’m not letting this photo op go to waste!” You laugh and give her your phone. She leads you to a plush white tufted bench and instructs you how to pose. “Okay, stay still and....Done!” She shows you the pic. “What do you think?”

“You took an amazing photo! I’ll post it.” You quickly post the sexy photo of yourself.

Just then Jackie and Aly saunter in, both wearing Leather & Lace. “I knew you two would get along!”, you say.

“Okay, Arielle. We’ll do your hair and makeup first so you can drop Belle off. By the time you come back, everyone will be ready.” They all usher into a chair as Si starts with your hair and Aly with makeup. They show you the mirror.

“Wow...I look...beautiful!”, you say surprised. Your hair has been let down in thick curls, parted to the side and sprayed with sparkly hairspray. Your makeup is simple but elegant, until the bright red lip.

“You’ve always been pretty.”, Aly says.

“Okay, I’ll go drop Belle off!”

“Wait! What about your shoes, earrings and jacket?...”, Si exclaims. She runs off, returning with matching gold tipped red velvet stilettos, gold hoop earrings and a bunch of rings and necklaces. Expertly placing them,she shoos you away.

“I’ll get a jacket later, come on Belle!” She runs up and holds your hand as you walk to the car. You place her in the backseat, fastening her seatbelt and you slip in the driver’s seat. “Can we leave, Belle?”

“Yeah! But I want music! Can you play something from Frozen, please?!” You nod, playing a Frozen playlist from your phone and connect to the car. Both of you sing the whole 15 minutes of driving. Pulling up, you lead her to the top floor. “Which door?”

“1204.” She runs up and knocks on the door, Frozen style. It takes you a while to catch up, because of those heels.

“...Do you want to build a snowman?!”

Ethan’s PoV:-

Hearing knocking and singing, you open the door to find an adorable 5 year old with a huge smile on her face. “You must be Belle. Who brought you here?”

“Aunt Arielle did! Where’s grandpa?!”, she asks.

“I’m right here! Come here and give me a hug!”, Naveen says. You smile as the girl runs into your mentor’s arms.

“Hey...sorry if this was last minute. I do know a lot of other babysitters but Naveen hasn’t seen her in a while.” You look up to see Arielle, wearing a wine red short dress, her hair let down in spiraling curls and her perfect lips painted red, leaving you trying to tear your eyes away.

“It’s fine. Come in, Naveen would want to see you.” She removes her heels and steps in.

“Sunshine, what a lovely surprise! You look beautiful!”

“Thank you. Belle picked out this dress.” She turns to Belle. “Now, be a good girl for Grandpa and Ethan, okay?”

“Mhm. I will! Byeee!” She kisses her on the cheek and turns to Naveen.

“Have fun, and please don’t exert yourself too much.” She gives him a hug and turns to you, slipping her heels on. “Thank you so much for looking after her. She doesn’t have any allergies or restrictions so there shouldn’t be any problem. She also loves dogs!”....She hesitates. “I’ll see you later.”, she heads to her car and drives away.

“Hi!! What’s your name?”

“My name is Ethan Ramsey.”

“Ohh! Aunt Arielle says your name a lot! She says that you’re very smart! Are you her boyfriend?!” You almost choke at that last bit.

“That wouldn’t be appropriate.”, you respond.

“Why not?!”, Belle asks.

“Because, I’m your aunt’s boss.”

“Ohhh! So you’re Aunt Arielle’s husband! She never told me though!” Your face is now beet red.

“Now what makes you think that, Belle?”, Naveen asks. You glare at him but he cuts you off.

“Well mommy says daddy’s name a lot. She also says that he’s very very smart. When they both first met, daddy was mommy’s boss. And now he’s mommy’s husband so that’s why I asked.”, she innocently says. “But I still don’t think they’re married!”, she says.

“Well Belle, what makes you think they’re not married?”, he asks.

“Naveen!” He gestures you to be quiet.

“Well, Aunt Arielle doesn’t have a ring like mommy and she doesn’t live with Uncle Ethan either. Also, Aunt Arielle would never have her wedding without me! She says I’m her favourite person in the world.”

“I think you’ve met your match, Ethan! Look how smart she is!”, Naveen says with a huge grin on his face.

You roll your eyes. “Are you hungry?”

“Nope! Let’s play! Will you play with me please!?” She gives you the same eyes Arielle gives you when she’s asking for something.

“Alright, do you like dogs?” Her face lights up, you can’t but help thinking about a certain intern. “Damnit Ramsey! Snap out of it!”

“You have a dog?!!! Can I see!?”, she shrieks. You lead her to your bedroom, where Jenner is lazily napping.

“Hey boy! Look who’s here. You have a new friend!” He perks up and goes near Belle, they suddenly run out of the room chasing each other and in the process, knocking down one of your lamps.

Naveen laughs. “Looks like you’ve got your hands full! Let’s see if one of the world’s best diagnosticians can handle a 5 year old for a night!”

You sigh, knowing this is going to be a long night.