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#I thought about mentioning this in the main post but it kinda felt like a false dichotomy
jocastas-padawan · 2 years
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The new abilities shown off in today’s Zelda footage reminded me that sometimes Nintendo is really good at responding to fan criticism.
Some of the biggest complaints BOTW fans share are about weapon durability. The goal of that mechanic was to encourage weapon variety, but players didn’t like to lose weapons they’d worked hard to get.
Instead of adding some sort of repair bench or just removing durability altogether, they introduced a mechanic that lets you improve the durability of weapons by gluing another weapon to it. Now, you’re incentivized to explore weapon variety in a way that doesn’t punish you for sticking with the same weapon!
Between that and the Ascend ability basically making climbing stamina problems obsolete, TotK really seems to have a theme of addressing player concerns without compromising the spirit of the game.
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felidthing · 1 month
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i just had a very long complicated dream about some very ooc homestuck kids. jade might be rooted in some form of fanon at least but i dunno
#posts#i could b wrong abt jade. i really liked the way she was in this though#she was all the yay happy im jade harley niceness but also like. very self-righteous and impulsive#and very emotional. and stubborn. and protective of people she thought were being treated unfairly#she had an extreme reaction thinking someone was in danger cb of an outburst so she herself had a massive outburst and was panicking until-#-she found out they were okay and alive for now and then switched to just clinging desperately to them and getting very angry at anyone who#didnt show the same level of care and protectiveness for them than she was#like she was fully creating a two sides issue and staunchly choosing a side#and then when it didnt look like things were gona go any better she zapped her and her friend and one person who seemed kinda-#- neutral-positive onto a spaceship to escape as far away as possible#so. that. she was consistently the most easygoing with this random guy my dream isekai'd into the situation. which at times made her an-#-enabler or something bc she prioritized his comfort over any change ever even ones that could have been good for him#johns main part in this Story was he kinda just had an autistic meltdown and then pov guy had a similar situation not long later#on a larger scale and people in general were just even less nice about him because he was older and hadnt grown up there lol#also this dream was very much from random guys pov which was My pov#but it wasnt Me i was just fully some character. anyways#after pov guys massive outburst he runs back home where john is and john is not very sympathetic#he was very much projecting the shame an embarrassment he felt bc even though the people there at least knew him they still werent nice to-#-him either#so it was a ''i know from experience that You should know better than to have needs in public'' type deal#originally rose was there and then my brain switched her out for roxy. im so sorry rose#but either way the lalondechild had such a murky existence and it only solidified into roxy at the end where the confrontation thing was-#happening. with the jade freakout#there was also some Superpower Awakening shit happening? previously mentioned w jade. but john when pov guy came home had a white streak in#his hair and jades went FULLY white when she blew up#so thats cool i guess. her hair went back to normal the next time she was seen on the ship#there was some montage shit going on#anyways. insane fucking dream. can i steal this shit and make ocs.#like i said these kids were pretty ooc. i feel like parts were definitely still rooted in some perception of the characters butttt#its was just one or two small things. idk man all i know is i am thinking so hard about this
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rubysparx · 9 months
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Honestly I don't think I'm qualified to make this post, I just don't know if I can make coherent enough words man. But the thoughts are in there and I will try to articulate them. This is probably going to be mostly images though. anyway yeah KABRU POST.
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A couple nights ago (at approximately 2:30am, lasting a little over half an hour) I had a bit of a moment about Kabru. That, too, was mostly images- most of what you see in this more concise post were presented then as well. I think my main points of the "moment" were about Kabru's trauma + self hatred, his autism and/or general otherness, and also a little labru if you'd like..
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I think something easy to start with is I wanna point out Kabru's constant back and forth and conflicting opinions of demihumans and how, I believe, thats a reflection of how he goes back and forth on what he believes his purpose of living is- and the general worth of his own life. I've said it before and i've just kinda shown it in images; Kabru is "i think im a monster and it disgusts me" where Laios is "I know im a human and it disgusts me" (i could go more into the latter on another post)
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the above are both from the world bible, with the left being from the section on kobolds and the right being from the section on Kuro specifically. Utaya was very near to the desert where most of the kobold population is, this is likely why Kabru is able to speak Kuro's language- he grew up around demihumans. (chapter 48 cover, kobold chapter in the world bible) I won't try to speak for how his mother or the rest of utaya felt about the kobolds but I can say that Kabru was very much othered as a child, as was his mother, purely for the way her son's (kabru) eyes looked.
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I feel like its fair enough to say that both kabru and the kobolds were othered, and possibly for similar reasons (villager's seeing them as nonhuman, as monsters) and the fact that Kabru learned their language probably didn't help his case. I think his perception of kobolds (and all demihumans, subsequently himself, as he probably still views himself as nonhuman or not human enough.. deep down) was damaged by the Utaya incident. at 2:30am when I first started this ramble my main comment was that "had the utaya incident not happened kabru would have little reason to feel ashamed for his connection to monsters. and may have ended up similar to laios in that he couldve had otherkin swag" which is just a sort of silly way of saying Kabru could've learned to love the thought that he is possibly nonhuman or at least not hated himself so much for it.
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in the original ramble I said, and quote, "he has been STALKING laios. laios is his hyperfixation to learn how he can ever be loved. he keeps going back and forth so harshly on wether or not he wants to kill Laios and he clearly sees his survival from utaya not as an unfortunate trauma [*] but as a necessary, deserved fate. a punishment for his mother's witchy sins, and for his sin of being non-human. to atone for it all, to apologize for being alive, he tries to better the lives of all humanity. He was set on his way to dethrone the governor of the island . do you understand? im going insane" *i also said somethings about the way he processes other people's traumas and not his own. He's able to understand and even help some people, but he struggles to process his own issues and see himself as worthy of love and life.
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^some examples of Kabru being understanding of or helping others who have suffered greatly. I think its also worth mentioning that with Rin (called "Lynn" in that translation) he says "I wish there was a way to get her out of this" though he's insisted and pushed for himself to go into a dungeon;
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In chapter 94, Mithrun says "The desire I had left wasn't revenge. All I wanted.. was for it to finish devouring me." and I don't feel like it's a stretch to say Kabru was in a similar situation. Mithrun sought out the demon with no plan on how to kill something like that because deep down he wanted it to end his (Mithrun's) own life, to finish the trauma it caused and kill him. I think Kabru went into the dungeon in part with the hopes that it'd kill him. That the same thing that destroyed Utaya and caused him so much trauma would just.. finish him.
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I just think Kabru is a beautifully complex character, I have a lotta thoughts on him and I don't see nearly as many analysis posts for him than I do Laios (despite labru being such a popular ship)
there is no tldr for this post idk how to summarize it. do what you will with this collection of images. have fun. go crazy
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fun fact the woman in the bottom left corner is his mother, she is labeled here as "witch"
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starcrossedmusings · 24 days
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Pretty Hands
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Pairing: best friend!Yunho x f!reader WC: 3.2k Warnings: eventual smut, reader has a thing for Yunho's hands (who doesn't??), swearing, fingering, choking, a little bit of degradation (he compares her to a whore literally once), PRAISE so much praise, Yunho talks reader through it (you're welcome), pov is kinda all over the place just let it be, Yunho is absolutely WHIPPED for reader teehee, probably some other things that I missed (let me know)
Summary: You and Yunho have been friends for years, and you tell each other everything. He suddenly takes a much more vested interest in your love life when you can't stop mentioning your newest interest.
A/N: This is entirely self indulgent and also I just wanted to get something full posted. The Phantom fic is turning out to be much longer than I originally anticipated (and so did this one once I started writing it). Let me know what you think♡
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Stepping into Yunho's apartment had always felt like coming home, and today was no exception. You take your shoes off in the tiled entryway and pad your way through the main living area, calling out to him as you walk.
"Yun? I'm here!"
His muffled response flows down from the end of the hall, "Bedroom!"
You make your way through the back hallway and enter his room, finding him exactly where you thought he would be, focused in on his computer. There's a selection of empty drink cans and snack wrappers scattered around his desk, which tells you that whatever he's currently building on Minecraft has probably occupied the majority of his day so far. He pauses the game and turns his chair to face you.
"Whats up?"
"Got bored at home and my roommate isn't even trying to muffle her pornstar moans for her new boy toy."
Yunho barks out a laugh, "Does she seriously sound--"
"Just like it Yun I can't make this shit up. I'm starting to think maybe they're recording themselves in there."
Yunho wiggles his eyebrows as he stretches his arms up and over his head, leaning back in his chair. "Well, if I ever see your living room on Pornhub I'll be sure to let you know"
You crinkle your nose. "Ew. I do NOT need to know that."
"Whatever, don't act like you haven't been talking to me for weeks about how horny you are. If I have to hear about your vibrator dying one more time I'm gonna buy you a new one myself."
"You try getting unintentionally edged three nights in a row with a full charge, it's some bullshit Yun. Besides, I'm allowed to complain about my dry spell."
Yunho scoffs, tone playful and lighthearted. "Dry spell? It's been what? Two months?"
"It's been three thank you very much." You move to sit on his bed.
"Well some of us haven't had sex in much longer."
"Oh, please, that girl that San was messing around with was all over you at his birthday party last month, don't tell me you didn't take that opportunity."
Yunho raises his eyebrows in shock, leaning forward in his chair. "Wait, really?"
"Oh my GOD Yun you are so oblivious. Yes really. She was all giggly and twirling her hair and shit. That's like...girl flirting basics."
"I am not oblivious, I am actually quite observant. I could tell you things about yourself you don't even know. I just have my sights set on someone and that someone is not her."
You shoot him an incredulous look and snort out a laugh, leaning back to lay down completely on his bed, legs dangling off the edge. "Sure Yun, whatever makes you feel better."
You hear Yunho stand from his chair and feel his weight shift onto the mattress. He appears in your vision, a challenging playful sparkle in his eyes as he peers down at you. "Okay, fine. I can tell that you're trying out a new perfume, you just went shopping because your leggings are a different brand than you usually wear, and I know that you washed your hair last night because you're wearing it all the way down today."
You do your best to ignore the way your stomach summersaults at his attention to detail about you and your routines. You roll onto your side and prop your head up on your elbow, matching his challenging gaze. "Okay Sherlock Holmes. What kind of underwear am I wearing then?"
Yunho pauses to consider before responding "a thong, probably black." You grin triumphantly and lean in just a bit closer.
"Wrong. I'm not wearing any. You lose!" You stick your tongue out playfully at him and he swats your shoulder, falling back onto his mattress.
"You set me up!"
"Face it Yun, I'm just better than you."
"Yeah yeah, whatever" Yunho pouts, voice hightening slightly from surprise. He can feel a slight redness creeping up his ears and prays his hair has grown long enough to cover it. 'I'm not wearing any.' He clears his throat. "So why go commando? You finally planning to seduce your new conquest?"
"He is not a new conquest, he doesn't even know I like him."
"He will once he knows you aren't wearing any underwear for him" Yunho jokes, smiling cheekily. You smack at his chest.
"I didn't want to do laundry last night, asshole. Get your mind out of the gutter!"
"You're one to talk" he mutters under his breath.
You sit up fully and reach for one of the pillows at the top of his bed, slamming it down on his face. "Jeong Yunho I swear to god!" On your second swing, he manages to catch the pillow with one hand and pry it from your grasp, but not before giving you an entirely unhelpful image of his long fingers gripping the plush material.
"What?? All I ever hear you talk about lately is how tall and handsome this dude is and how much his hands make you drool."
"You sound jealous."
"I'm not jealous, I'm pissed that I have to hear all about him and don't even get to know what the dude's name is."
"I told you, I'm gatekeeping this time. You run your mouth too much."
"I do not!"
"Do too."
"Ugh FINE whatever," Yunho chucks the pillow back towards you and you dodge it, leaving both pillows on one side of the headboard, "You're so agitating."
"You know you love me Yun. But just for the attitude," You adjust both pillows and shuffle your way back until you're leaned against both of them, "no pillow for you for tonights doomscrolling session."
He huffs a laugh and scoots up to meet you, pulling out his phone and settling in against the headboard.
An hour later you get up to go to the bathroom, and when you get back Yunho has stolen both of his pillows. You frown and cross your arms. "Hey, asshole, those were mine!"
"Yeah?" He taunts playfully, "Well they were mine to begin with, and my back is killing me. So deal." You roll your eyes and cross back over to the bed, crawling over the side you've been sitting on and curling yourself into Yunho's side to rest your head against his chest. You feel him tense slightly underneath you before he moves one of his arms around your shoulders to let you lay more comfortably.
"There's no way in hell I'm sitting up against that cold ass metal frame you call a headboard." You mutter as you begin scrolling. Yunho's chuckle rumbles through his chest and tickles your cheek. You both sit in silence for a while, content to scroll on your phones. Eventually, you turn to look up at him from his chest.
"I meant to ask how your new project has been going. Whatever you were building when I came in looked pretty intense." You can see the faint tinge of red trail up his ears and neck--a telltale sign that whatever you caught him building makes him embarrassed. You sit up, propping your weight on your elbow and placing a hand on his chest to shove him slightly. "Ooooo now you have to tell me what it is!"
"It's embarrassing..."
"Tell me tell me tell me tell me--"
"Okay fine, fuck. I'll tell you if you promise not to laugh--"
"I won't I swear!"
"Pinky promise?" He holds his pinky out to you, and you raise a hand from his chest. Before you can lace your pinky in his, he pulls his hand up above his head. "I'm serious, Y/N, if you laugh I'll have no choice but to tickle you to death."
He's definitely not stalling because he has to come up with a reply, because he certainly hasn't been building a treehouse for you in what he hopes will one day be a shared server. Yunho thinks to himself that he would rather die than let you find out.
You scoff, "I won't laugh...and even if I did I'm not ticklish so your threat is a moot point."
Yunho drops his hand down onto the mattress. "Bullshit."
"It's not. I don't have a ticklish bone in my body."
"Liar."
You shake your head, and Yunho takes the opportunity to gently press the pads of his fingers into the sides of your ribs. The sensation hits you almost immediately, and you feel the tight feeling in your chest as he begins tickling you. You squeal and thrash around in his grasp, trying desperately to get away from his assault.
"Yun stop it--"
"Not until you admit you're a liar!" You begin to giggle and manage to roll away from him, but Yunho is quick to follow. He swings a long leg over your hips and pins you beneath him, a single large hand trapping both of your wrists above your head while the other dances across your ribs. "Admit it," He sings out.
"Okay! Okay fine I'm a liar!" You gasp out between laughter. Yunho beams down at you and immediately stops tickling your sides, leaving you panting underneath him--
Oh fuck...you're panting underneath him.
He can almost feel the shift in the air as he stares down at you. He knows he should move, just roll off of you and make up some bullshit lie about what he was building. You like someone else, and he clearly wasn't getting out of the friend zone any time soon. He's just making a fool of himself...and yet he just can't bring himself to stop memorizing the way you look splayed out beneath his hips. Eventually he forces himself to stop staring at the way your chest rises and falls or the sliver of your tummy that's poking out from underneath your shirt that's riding up. He locks eyes with you.
Your voice comes out softer than he's ever heard you speak before. "Hey Yun?"
"Yeah?"
"You know that mystery guy I've been telling you about? The one with the pretty hands?"
A twinge of annoyance flairs in his stomach and he can't help but grumble out his reply. "Yeah?"
"I'll give you a hint. He's got me pinned to the mattress right now."
Yunho feels his heart drop deep into the pit of his stomach.
"Like...like right now he does?"
You laugh lightly. "Yeah, right now, Yun."
Yunho swallows thickly as his head starts spinning. He leans down much slower than he would have liked to, giving you plenty of time to take it back--to laugh at him and tell him you got him good. He feels like his whole body lights ablaze when you close the final gap between your lips, and suddenly he is kissing you.
In almost any circumstance that you had seen Yunho kissing someone, he was always fast-paced--hot and heavy petting in the corner of a darkened bar, dares in drunken party circles--which is why you were floored at the reverence he was kissing you with now. His mouth was steady and intense against yours, his hands roaming slowly across the expanse of your torso like he was memorizing the feel of something priceless. You gently pull your hands from his grasp and tangle them in his hair, pulling him closer and matching his intensity with your fervor. You feel his hands make their way to the lower hem of your shirt, and your skin erupts in goosebumps as you feel his fingers ghost along the sliver of skin there. He breaks the kiss and you feel his breath fan across your face as he pants. His hands gently make their way to rest just under your shirt, not quite pushing the fabric up. He locks eyes with you.
"Is this okay?"
You chuckle gently. "Yes, Yun, you can touch me. I want you to touch me." You watch his eyes darken and his hands start running up your torso, pulling your shirt up with them.
"Where do you want me to touch you, baby?"
You exhale heavily and arch your back into his touch. "Anywhere...everywhere...I don't care."
Yunho smirks and feels his ego inflate. "You don't care? Hmm..." He starts planting kisses along your jaw and down the side of your neck. Slow. Teasing. "If I remember correctly, you seemed pretty keen about having my hands in some specific places baby. Can you refresh my memory?"
The low whine that escapes your throat nearly sends him spiraling. "You know where...don't make me say it."
He does know, but there's nothing he wants to hear more right now than to hear you say it. He brings one hand up to your chest, cupping one of your boobs and squeezing gently as he continues peppering your neck with kisses. "Was it here? Or..." His hand trails back down and grips your hip possessively, "Here, maybe?" He hears you huff and feels your hand wrap around his wrist. You try to tug it up, and he chuckles softly but allows you to move his hand. He nips your earlobe and asks lowly, "Where do you need my hands baby?" He feels his cock twitch in his sweats when you wrap his fingers around your throat, guiding him to squeeze the sides gently. Your hands run down his chest and drop to your sides as he squeezes a little harder. "Fuck, look at you. So pretty with my hand around your neck."
You whine and buck your hips up, desperately looking for friction. Yunho coos as he looks down at you, wanting to have the image burned into his memory. He adjusts his position so he's sat on one side of you and brings his free hand to your thighs, squeezing the flesh there and watching the way you spread your legs for him. "Pretty girl, I need you to use your words. Spreading your legs like a whore isn't gonna get you what you want." He revels in the way you throw your head back onto the mattress and close your eyes, frustration evident already on your face.
"Need your fingers, Yun. Please."
Holy shit, he could combust right then and there. He smiles and traces his hands along the inside of your clothed thighs. "Good girl. So polite for me." He hooks his fingers in the waistband of your leggings and pulls them down and off, leaving you bare from the waist down. "Sit up for me baby. I want you between my legs."
Yunho sits on the edge of the mattress and allows you time to sit up, moving to sit in between his thighs. He hooks your legs over his, leaving you spread and completely at his mercy. A shiver runs down your spine as the pads of his fingers run across your thighs and you gasp as they brush against your core. He presses kisses into your neck and chuckles, "You're already soaking wet, what's got you all bothered hmm? I've barely touched you..." Yunho hums and teases your entrance with this middle finger. He can feel you clenching. "Do you like my hands that much baby? All it takes is a little choking and you're putty for me." He pushes two fingers inside, pumping slowly and curling back to find your sweet spot. He feels pride flare through his chest at the noise you make, a mix between a whine and a moan that eggs him on.
Your toes curl as Yunho almost immediately finds your g-spot. The pace he sets is almost perfect, and when he begins rubbing tight circles on your clit your eyes roll back into your head. The pleasure is a building wave, and it's all you can do to keep yourself remotely still as he continues pumping his thick fingers in and out. "Oh my god, Yun, please don't stop!" You clench helplessly around his fingers and let your head roll back to rest on his shoulder.
"Awe baby I'm not gonna stop. Not until I see how pretty you look cumming all over me. Will you do that for me, sweetheart?" he coos, bringing his other hand back up to your throat and squeezing lightly. "Will you cum all over my fingers? I bet you want to right? Wanna come on my fingers while I squeeze this pretty neck of yours?"
You whine and preen at his words and arch your back. Your legs begin to shake as Yunho's circling on your clit quickens pace just slightly, the thrusts of his fingers audible from the squelching between your thighs. Your breath quickens.
"My pretty girl, you're such a mess for me, aren't you? Can you hear how wet you are? All soaked for me? I bet your hands don't feel as good as mine hmm?"
You shake your head no violently, whining as he continues to talk lowly into your ear. Your orgasm builds quickly, and at this point you have no faith in your ability to speak coherently.
"No, they don't do they? I want you to show me how good my hands feel baby. Let go for me, sweetheart."
Your breath catches in your throat as you tip over the edge, and the feeling of your release washes over you. Your whole body jolts in his grasp as he continues pumping his fingers. You feel him squeeze your throat gently, just enough pressure to remind you that he's got you.
"Atta girl, look at you! Doing so good for me." You whine and buck your hips, orgasm still riding through your body. Yunho nips at your neck lightly and slows his pumping to a stop as you continue to shake. "That's it baby, just grind on them for me." The final aftershock of your orgasm finishes, and you go limp in his arms, leaning all of your weight back into his chest and breathing heavily.
Yunho pulls his fingers out and admires the mess you made on them before popping them into his mouth. He's still rock hard, and the taste of you on his fingers makes him twitch again. He'll definitely need your help with that later. He uses the hand around your neck to brush a stray hair from out of your face. "How are you feeling?"
You huff out a breathless laugh and turn your face to nuzzle into his neck. "How do you think I feel? That was...wow."
He can't help the goofy smile that crosses his face. "Oh really? Tell me more, I'd like a full report." He jokes, pulling the two of you down to snuggle on his bed. He grabs a throw blanket from your side and pulls it over the two of you and nearly melts when you curl closer to him, burying your face into his chest.
"Give me a few minutes to recover and I'll show you exactly how I'm feeling right now." Yunho rubs a hand up and down your back.
"I look forward to that."
"And then afterwards you're going to show me what you've been building."
Yunho chuckles and kisses the top of your head. No way in hell.
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healmydesires · 4 days
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sweet like sugar ꕤ (l.h)
part one
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pairing: Logan Howlett x fem!reader
summary: Now that Logan was finally able to call you his, he couldn’t get enough of you.
OR
Logan fucks you from behind.
genre: fluff + smut (18+ mdni)
word count: 3,7k
warnings/tags: friends to lovers, roommates to lovers, thunderstorms, literally the scene right after this fic, porn with NO plot, reader is described as shorter than logan, inexperienced!reader, hint at loss of virginity, unprotected sex, piv sex, doggy style, soft!dom logan, ok… just in overall bye, logan is soft for reader, sub!reader, creampie, overstimulation, major size kink, praise kink, dirty talk, logan talks you thru it. a lot more daddy kink in this one ngl. HEAVY ON THE BREEDING kink aaaaa sorry. I am still ovulating. they’re both FREAKS. scent kink? reader is also ovulating bye. lots of pet names. logan is worshipping his sweet girl ok! reader is a mutant but it’s not really mentioned in this part tho. reader has hair, no further description though. this is not beta read sorry!
a/n: GUESS WHAT!!! I finished part two that I wanted to originally post in the main fic but it kinda felt out of place idk either way!! I’m posting it now 🤪 I thought I’ll write what I WANT to read. this is high key self indulgent. english isn’t my first language so pls bear with me <3 this is just smut😭 I literally wrote this while ovulating…
this goes without saying, but if you don't like it don't read it <3
AO3 • masterlist
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Logan manhandled your body, guiding your body so that you were lying on your stomach. He manoeuvred you in the position he wanted you to be. His hands came to hold your hips, pulling them up, your ass in the air for him.
He kneads the flesh of your cheeks before spreading them apart for him. Your body slumped slightly forward with exhaustion but Logan is quick to grip your hips, holding you in the same position. “Oh kitten, I’m not done with you yet.” He tutted.
You whimpered, feeling his eyes on your wet heat as it clenched repeatedly, aching and begging to be filled all over again and again. Logan growled as he stared at your entrance as your combined cum dripped down your hole, as you continued to clench around nothing. Your body trembled with anticipation.
Logan had made sure you’d cum several times before he took you for the first time. Before tonight, you were so inexperienced, a virgin actually. Now, all you could think about was that you wanted and needed him to continue and fuck you for hours, filling your pussy with his cum over and over again.
He leaned over you, covering your whole body with his own. Logan nuzzled your neck as he littered your skin with his kisses. You writhed against him, wishing he was just pushing his cock in you already and filling you up in the best way.
The air was stuffy all around you, each harsh breath released only thickening it up, leaving your skin hot and your mind fuzzy. Logan groaned into your ear, mouthing kisses along your neck, tongue trailing down the junction between your neck and shoulder before he gently nipped your skin.
Logan reached down to grasp his cock to line up with your tight entrance. He rubbed his tip firmly over your pulsing hole. Your mind was all over the place as his ministrations continued.
“Fuck, can’t wait to fill you up again.”
His breath caught in his throat as his cock smeared his pre cum against your already cum filled hole. The usual restraint between his mind and his words seemed to vanish, as words tumbled from his mouth.
“I wonder if you can handle this position already.” He whispered almost to himself as his hands kneaded your ass cheeks. “Your tiny pussy could barely handle my cock earlier…”
“No, daddy… I can take your big cock.” You whined desperately as you tried to push your hips against his own, hoping he’d enter your pussy again. You were squirming, as you kept trying to push his cock inside you, but Logan had a strong hold on you, which made it hard for you to move around too much. “I’m daddy’s good girl.”
At your words Logan growled, grasping your hips and tilting them more and pushed your trembling legs further apart.
Logan inhaled sharply. “You smell so good, kitten. I can smell your fertility. Your little pussy is practically begging for my cum.” He murmured against your ear. Your cheeks flushed with heat at his words. Logan continued as he pressed tender kisses down your neck, “Can’t wait to breed this pussy again and again with my cock. All night.” Logan moaned and you hissed at the heated sensation of his cock, your eyelids fluttering when you felt it press against your entrance.
A broken gasp left your lips as he finally slid the tip inside you. You felt his body moving behind you, sitting up against you, and you knew his eyes were on your pussy. He watched as your walls spread to try and begin to wrap around him. You whimpered at the new angle as you tried to accommodate his girth. He could barely get more of it in your tight walls at first, eventually using more force to open you up for him. It felt like you were being torn open, split in half.
“D-d-daddy…” you stuttered and mewled.
“I know baby girl, I know.” Logan moaned as he gradually slid more of his thickness inside you and you trembled more underneath him. Your pulsing walls were wrapped tightly around his cock, as your soaked pussy pulled him in more. The pressure of his massive dick deep within your walls overwhelmed you while you clutched the sheets below you in tight fists.
Logan towered over you, as he pushed more of his length inside you, his gaze focused on your clenching hole as his dick slowly disappeared more and more inside you.
You arched your back as you clung onto the bed sheets for dear life, nails digging into the comforters. You couldn’t keep quiet, little mewls and whimpers tumbled past your lips with ease as Logan slid inside.
“Ah, daddy… so big.” You whined.
“You take me so well, pretty girl. Doing so good for daddy.” He moaned as he leaned down to press a soft kiss against your cheek, as he kept pushing more of his girth in you slowly. Every time Logan would slide more inside your pussy would squeeze around him. You knew he was barely halfway in, still you felt so full.
“So full…”
“I know my sweet girl, I know. You’re doing so well, soon you’ll be filled with all of daddy’s cock.”
The whines and whimpers and moans kept spilling from your lips as Logan continued to push deeper and deeper. Your hands trembled as they gripped the sheets between your fingers while he penetrated your tight walls.
“P-please, need more. I can handle it daddy…” you whimpered as you tried to push back your trembling body against him, his cock sliding deeper inside you.
He groaned at your desperate whines and as you pushed back against him , losing his composure momentarily as he thrust the rest of his thick cock all the way inside your wetness. The head of his cock touched your cervix once he bottoms out. A scream left your mouth as you trembled underneath him, your pussy trying to adjust to his size as it clenched around his cock. You pushed your head into the pillows as pathetic whimpers kept falling from your lips.
“Christ, you’re so warm—fuck—so tight,” he growled, rambling without a thought, too enveloped in the feeling of your tight walls wrapped around him.
You moaned and squeezed around his cock at his words, leaving him panting above you. Both of his hands moved to grab at your ass cheeks, kneading them slowly and gently.
“God, sweetheart, you’re so fucking hot… and wet. How are you this tight?” Logan groaned — the deep timbre of his voice reverberating through the air.
There was an intense pressure deep within your stomach — Logan’s thick cock throbbed erratically inside you. The feeling of him nestled so deep within you had you sighing in pleasure. There was still a dull ache — from how wide he stretched you out; your walls pulled apart to their limits — but pleasure soon replaced the stinging ache. Gradually, you adjusted to Logan’s size and with an experimental swivel of your hips, you cried out in pleasure.
Fingers were digging harder into your ass, soft grunts and pants escaped his lips as you moved your hips slowly back against him. “Fuck— that’s it, baby. Grind all over my cock—you feel so good,” Logan growled as his head fell back. The soft murmuring of his voice ripped through the room, the sounds of his own pleasure intermingled with yours.
“Fuck, Logaaaan,” you whined — drawing out the syllables of his name. His hands were still on your ass — holding the plump flesh in his large hands while he squeezed and spread them apart.
Pleasure seeped into your veins, and you began grinding and squeezing more feverishly against him. Short gasps of pleasure slipped from your lips, as you felt his cock pulse inside your tight walls.
“Kitten, fuck, I can’t wait anymore. Need to fuck you.” He slurred and panted above you — euphoric elation dripped from his words. Your stomach twisted — the heat inside caused your stomach to flip and turn with every one of your movements. “Need to breed this pussy.”
“Ah, Lo—”
Both your breaths laboured as you’d feel his hips move, quickly pulling himself almost all the way out of your pussy, as you whined at the empty feeling. “Such a needy pussy.” Logan growled before he thrust himself all the way inside your cunt again.
“Ah ah fuck, daddy… oh my god—” you hiccup as he moved his hips slowly but hard against yours. You cried out as he thrust so deep inside you that it had your body slumping against the bed. Your pussy continued to pulse and squeeze around his thickness, as it tried to adjust to its girth still.
“Pussy needs to be filled all the time ain’t that right?” He groaned as he punctuated every word with a thrust.
You moaned loudly as you arched your back and pressed your ass up against him. He grabbed your asscheeks, keeping the angle perfect as he rolled his hips deeply into yours. You felt his cock throbbing inside you as you tightened around him.
He was so deep, hitting your cervix repeatedly which made your eyes roll back in your head.
“F-fuck baby girl, you’re so sexy like this.” Logan slowly picked up his pace at the sight of you throwing your head back. “You’re all mine, isn’t that right kitten?”
With every thrust, you couldn’t help but cry out in pleasure. Not only was Logan’s cock thick, but he was incredibly long too, his length just slightly curved: which allowed his head to drag against that sweet spot inside you.
Large hands moved to your hips, Logan gripped them tightly as he helped you move against him. Every movement had hot spikes of pleasure jolting across your skin, your toes curled in elation while your stomach twisted and knots violently. The ecstatic bliss of your impending orgasm called to you and you began bouncing your ass against him.
“Ah, y-yes yes yes, I’m all yours. P-please please f-fuuuck, I need m-mo—” you begged and you’re unable to finish your sentence as he gave you a particularly hard thrust.
You felt your arms almost giving out on you because of the force of his thrusts. Logan’s hands were clawing at the sides of your hips, guiding you with him, and he leaned down to place kisses on your upper back, his kisses travelled down your spine, until he leaned back up and just watched you as he fucked into you from behind.
Skin melded together, your sweat acting as a glue, you lost yourself into the feel of Logan. Your mind goes blank as all you could do was focus on the feeling of him stretching you, filling you up, so overwhelmed with bliss already. He thrust deeper inside you, which earned him whines and moans as you continued to cry out his name. You tried to tell him, breathlessly, about how good he made you feel.
The sound of your pleasure fuelled his desire to fuck you better, urged him to do more.
Logan picked up his pace, thrusting into you quicker, harder, hitting the spot that had your body going numb.
From above you, Logan fucked harder — his cock thrusting deeper into you. The additional sensation caused you to whimper, your pussy twitched as sheer, unadulterated bliss began flitting through your bloodstream. You were close — so close you could practically taste your orgasm; even if your mouth was completely dry from gasping his name and calling him daddy over and over again.
You clawed at the sheets, burying your face into the pillow to muffle your screams. The air was all stuffy around you as his hips moved faster, you whimpered as you tried to push back your hips against his to take more of his big cock. Your tiny pussy was so full of him, still trying to accommodate his thick girth as it pulsed and tightened around him. Logan moaned at the sight, kneading your ass as he tried to bury himself more inside you, his tip hitting your cervix instantly. Your eyes rolled back inside your head once again as you dug your fingers more into the bed, you mewled against the sheets at the overwhelming pleasure he was giving you.
You whined loudly as he shifted inside you, the new angle made him hit your sensitive spot inside you.
“Fuuuck,” Logan moaned. Your pussy was so wet and warm around him, your walls squeezed his cock with every thrust, “feels so good, kitten. You’re taking daddy’s cock so well.”
Your noises became louder and higher pitched as he continued his assault on your pussy, indicating that you were getting closer as well as the lewd sounds of your pussy that kept meeting his cock over and over again. The sounds mixed so well with your desperate cries.
Logan couldn’t help it, you looked so pretty like this. Fucked out beneath him and so fucking full of his cock, the closer he got to his orgasm the more the images of you filled with his cum consumed his thoughts.
“Your pussy is so tight and wet around me, begging me to fill you up in other ways… begging for my cum.” He groaned as he thrust harder into your heat. “Begging for me to breed her.”
“God, daddy-daddy please. Fuck I—” You whined as your eyes rolled back inside your head.
“What do you want, kitten?” He groaned while one of his hands reached around you to slip against your clit as you writhed against him as he applied pressure. The pleasure had the tension tightening in the pit of your stomach, dying for your release.
Suddenly, everything became too much: the pressure against your clit, his grunts, the sticky, sweaty feeling, his scent, his warmth, the drilling of his cock inside you. Just everything. You tried to catch your breath but from how Logan was thrusting inside you and the rubbing against your clit it felt almost impossible to do so.
“F-feels s-soo— F-fuck, I-I, daddyyyy—”
“Look at you,” he chuckled breathlessly, “so cock drunk and so fucked out you can barely talk.” He whispered once he leaned down as he buried his head in the crook of your neck, as he picked up his pace once again. He fucked you so fast and hard that you swore you never moaned so loud in your life. “Don’t worry, I think I know what you need.”
He leaned his body completely against yours as he continued to hit against your cervix repeatedly while one of his hands kept rubbing your little bundle of nerves. “Feels good doesn’t it, sweet girl?” You whimpered and trembled underneath him as you nodded, he moaned against your ear before he whispered close to you. “Does it feel good? That I’m fucking you like this? Just the way you wanted it.”
“Y-yes! F-feels sooooo so gooood, Looo—” you whined as he continued to hit your sensitive spots inside you. Logan’s fingers kept pressing down on your little nub making you squirm. The tension continued to build up as the pleasure became too overwhelming.
“That’s right, princess.”
Logan snapped his hips into you again and again, thrusting deep, causing you to see stars from knowing just how to pleasure you. You felt like your head was swimming once again as you whined. “I’m sooo so close, p-please… daddy… I’ve been such a good girl.” you begged desperately. You only needed one more little push, a little bit more attention to finally reach your peak again.
“Yes, you’ve been such a good girl for daddy.” He panted above you.
You cried out for him, your moans almost sounding like his name as he moved his head down again, pressing kisses all over the side of your face down your neck.
“Can’t wait, fuck—“ he breathed, he stopped himself to let out a loud groan, “can’t wait to fill you up. I keep dreaming about filling you up nice and good. ”
The words made you keen and pulse around his cock, as you moaned his name into the warm air of your bedroom. You wanted more, needed to hear more, wanted to know what else he wanted, what else he dreamed of but your voice was strangled, your brain incapable of forming a sentence.
“I keep dreaming about breeding this pussy until you’re fuckin’ pregnant.” He grunted before he whispered in your ear, “be a good girl and cum for daddy.”
“Fuck, oh my god,” you cried, a shrill wail as Logan’s words went straight to your pussy. Your cunt gushed all over Logan’s cock as he never stopped. His thrusts were hard and deep, enough to turn your vision starry.
“That’s it… that’s it, let go pretty girl.” He murmured lowly into your ear.
His hips never slowed down as he massaged your clit. And then the coil in your lower tummy snapped, your eyes rolled back into your head while you arched your back as your world dissolved into pure ecstasy. You couldn’t stop yourself from shaking as he talked you through it. You almost blacked out because of the intensity of your orgasm, trembling like crazy. You whimpered as the overstimulation got to you.
“Doing so good for me, baby.” He groaned as his pace became more erratic, with less finesse as he charged towards his own finish line. “Daddy wants to fill you up. N-need to fuck my cum into you, kitten. Breed you and get you nice and full…”
Your walls pulsed and tightened around him as he continued to hit your sweet spot inside you. He groaned as his movements became more sloppy. He cried out your name with a gasping breath. Loud mewls left your lips as he finally spilled his seed inside you, coating each inch of you with a warmth that pooled deep inside you. An instant wave of pleasure rolled throughout your body as he filled you up with his hot cum.
“Ah...” you whimpered underneath him as your body continued to shake.
He kept fucking his cock inside of you, fucking his cum deep inside of you until he was satisfied. Logan exhaled deeply as he came down from his high, his body slumping against your own. His cock was still lodged deep inside you, still half hard as he kept the cum inside your pussy. You whimpered as your pussy pulsed around him, as it kept clenching repeatedly around his still hard length.
You tried to catch your breath as Logan groaned while you continued tightening involuntarily around him. “Kitten,” he warned breathlessly, “don’t do that.”
“I can’t really help it.” You said under your breath.
He gently pulled out of your tiny spent hole, making you whimper at the loss and you felt his eyes on you, knowing that he watched his seed drool out of you. Your legs were spread wide, and your pussy slightly gaping from where he’d fucked you open. But he was much more focused on how his cum leaked out of you, his seed dripping down your hole. Chest swelling with pride, he couldn’t help but let out a lazy smile.Your pussy continued to clench repeatedly around nothing and he groaned at the sight. Logan made sure to plunge his pointer finger into your hole as you gasped, stuffing you back up with your shared cum.
You winced at the sensation, a whimper slipped from your lips at the sensitivity. Pressing a kiss to your knee, “We’ll have to clean you up,” Logan mumbled, even as he continued pushing his fingers inside you.
“Not now, I’m tired,” you murmured back whiningly. When the ache of oversensitivity got too much, you bat Logan’s hand away before you closed your legs.
With a low laugh, Logan pressed an apologetic kiss to your knee before picking you up effortlessly, making you yelp in surprise. “Up you go.” You were about to complain that you could walk perfectly to the bathroom on your own, when you felt sore and your legs felt incredibly numb.
Once he reached the bathroom, he sat you down on the edge of the bathtub all while running the water and surprising you with your favourite bath bomb, to create a bubble bath. It brought a smile to your face knowing he knew so much about you.
“Logan… how is it that you always know what I need?” You whispered as you looked at him dreamily.
“Isn’t that what your best friend and new boyfriend should know?” He gave you a teasing smile.
“Either way, thank you.” You whispered before pressing a soft kiss to his cheek.
“Anything for you, sweetheart.”
You leaned into Logan's gentle support as the tub filled. When it was ready, he carefully lifted you and helped you into the warm water. Looking up, you moved towards the centre, silently inviting him to join. Logan eased in behind you, and you shifted forward slightly so he could settle comfortably. The soothing warmth enveloped you both as you relaxed against him, relaxing instantly in the peaceful moment.​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​
His strong arms encircled your waist, drawing you closer until you were nestled securely against him. You let out a contented sigh, feeling the solid warmth of his chest behind you. The gentle rise and fall of his breathing was soothing, and you found yourself relaxing even further.
“I love you,” he whispered, his breath soft against your ear. His lips then traced a tender path down your neck, each kiss a gentle affirmation of his words. The sweet gesture sent a pleasant shiver through you.
A smile spread across your face as you settled deeper into his embrace, feeling utterly at peace. The moment felt perfect — safe, warm, and full of affection. You shifted against him, shuffling around as you moved closer into him in the water, you pressed your naked body against his. Face to face once again. Easily, your legs tangled together, and closing your eyes, you let his words and the comfort of his presence wash over you. Your heart swelled with emotion as you replied, your voice soft but filled with certainty.
“I love you too.”
In that quiet moment, surrounded by his warmth and care, you felt truly cherished. The storm outside seemed to fade away, leaving just the two of you in your own little bubble of contentment.​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​ And that’s how the rest of the night went, tender kisses and soft touches shared between you two as you enjoyed each other's company. Feeling so loved and at home as you melted in his embrace.
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895 notes · View notes
supernovafics · 5 months
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𝐍𝐄𝐖 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄
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pairing: eddie munson x fem!reader
word count: 2.3k words
summary: in which it’s hard to see eddie with anyone who isn't you
warnings: friends to lovers to friends again (kinda), explicit language, alcohol consumption, very brief mention of weed, pining, angst
author’s note: this is fully inspired by the song "new love" by girl in red. enjoy<333
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
“She’s right over there. Should I do it?”
“Yeah, go for it.”
Eddie nodded at your words and then he was standing up from the long patio chair that you, him, and Robin had been occupying for the past thirty minutes, and heading over to where his newest crush stood with a few of her friends. 
Robin let out a laugh. “I don’t get it.”
You turned your head to look at her. “What?”
“How you guys can still be friends right now. You only broke up like two months ago.” 
Making the promise to stay friends post-breakup was the only thing that made the breakup feel a thousand times less terrible. And it sounded easy enough— you and Eddie were simply just going to go back to how things were before you started dating.
“We’re better off as friends,” He had said to you that random Wednesday night back in January and you nodded understandingly. It was amicable and mutual, and eventually— maybe, hopefully— the barely five-month relationship would be a funny little story to reminisce about with each other years down the line.  
You took a long sip from the red cup in your hand and then shrugged at Robin’s words. “I don’t know. This just works somehow. It’s better.” 
You had been telling yourself that lie a lot lately— maybe almost too much. But, it was easier to pretend that that lie was the truth and that everything was fine, instead of thinking that maybe you made a mistake that night when you found yourself agreeing with Eddie and let things end between the two of you. 
“No offense, but so weird,” Robin said with a shake of her head. “So, who’s this new girl he’s into anyway?”
“I honestly don’t know.”
Eddie had told you a lot about her— how she saw one of his band’s shows recently with a few friends and how she kinda ran in the same-ish circles— but most of what he said about her went in one ear and out the other. Hearing him ramble on and on about a new crush hurt more than you thought it would. Even more than when you two were actually just friends and you were harboring what felt like a hopeless crush on him for years before finally admitting it.
Breaking up was supposed to save you both from more heartbreak in the long run, but most of the time it felt like it was only making things worse. Sometimes you wondered if Eddie felt the same way— if he regretted it as much as you did. 
It was almost too obvious that he didn’t, though, because he didn’t waste a second moving on. 
New girl, new crush, new love. All of which wasn’t you anymore. 
You looked away from where he stood next to the girl— you were only fifty percent sure her name was Ally. She was happily laughing at whatever Eddie had just said to her, and he was smiling widely. 
“I’m gonna go inside and attempt to find the bathroom,” You told Robin before downing the rest of what was in your cup and placing it on the ground, and then standing up.  
She looked up at you. “Want some help?” 
“No, it’s okay,” You shook your head. “I’ll be right back.” 
You kept your eyes down and away from Eddie as you walked into the house, a place that was way too small to have this many people in it. The inside was packed to the brim with a bunch of unfamiliar faces, and that was the main reason why you, Robin, and Eddie immediately retreated to the backyard once the three of you showed up. The only reason you all knew about the party was because of a friend of a friend of someone that Eddie met at The Hideout a few weeks ago.
You maneuvered through the throngs of dancing people and groups of friends talking loudly over the blasting music and headed up the stairs, hoping that it would be a bit more calm. 
The universe must have been somewhat on your side because you found the bathroom on your first try. You didn’t even need to use it, you just wanted a moment of quiet. And even though you could hear the muffled sounds of the song playing downstairs through the shut door, it was still good enough.
You leaned back against the sink and let out a long breath. 
It was hard not to think about Eddie with Ally and how happy they looked, even though it was only one of their first few conversations. All you wanted to do was take her place. All you wanted was for him to want you like that again. 
It wasn’t supposed to be this hard, this complicated. Being just friends again was supposed to be the best thing to do, and you now wanted to bitterly laugh at yourself for stupidly believing that thought two months ago. Most of the time, that night played back on what felt like a continuous loop in your head. You kept wondering if you should’ve done things differently; if you should’ve, maybe, fought harder to keep what you two had. 
“I don’t think we should do this anymore.”
You had immediately laughed at Eddie’s soft-spoken words, thinking that he was joking, but when he didn’t join in, you were furrowing your eyebrows in confusion. “What?”
“This just doesn’t make sense, y’know? We’re graduating soon, and then we’re gonna be going in completely different directions. You’re leaving Hawkins, and I already know that I’m gonna be stuck here.”
You were quiet because you had no idea how to respond to that. Maybe it was only half-right— yes, you were going to be headed to a college that was not in Indiana at the end of the summer, but you truly couldn’t imagine Eddie being “stuck” anywhere.
“We’re better off as friends,” He continued. “Neither of us can get hurt that way.”
It was all so surprising and felt entirely out of nowhere, but you could tell by how he said the words that he had been thinking about this for a while. There was a part of you that could understand what he meant, the sad why behind it all, so you decided to lean into that. Because, in a way, he was kind of right— the deeper you fell for each other, the more painful the heartbreak would be in the end, and the harder it would be to leave in August. 
But, shit, you were already in way too deep. 
You still felt yourself nodding in agreement with him anyway, even though it was the last thing you wanted to do. “Okay.”
“So… just friends again?”
You simply nodded again and gave him a small smile. “Yeah, of course. Just friends.” 
Now you felt so dumb for saying that, for agreeing to the idea. You couldn’t be “just friends” with Eddie Munson anymore. 
There was a loud knock on the door that abruptly pulled you out of your thoughts. 
“Sorry, one sec,” You yelled out to the person on the other side. 
You let out another breath and didn’t bother looking in the mirror to see if the sadness you were feeling was written so clearly across your face. Mainly because you knew that it definitely was and it would be too hard to replace it with a fake smile, anyway. 
A random girl was rushing in before you were even fully out of the door, and you hoped that she was doing better than you were at that moment, but it didn’t entirely seem like it.  
You decided that you wanted to go back outside and settle yourself back in your spot on the patio chair next to Robin, and you also really wanted another drink. The idea of blurring your thoughts for the rest of the night didn’t sound like the worst idea ever.  
You made your way to the stairs and before you even started heading down, you spotted Eddie walking up. He easily noticed you too and he smiled before meeting you at the top of the stairs after a second. He looked at you for a moment and then his eyebrows furrowed in concern. 
“Hey, you okay?” He asked, reaching out to place a hand on your upper arm. It was such a subtle and simple action, but it still made you feel way too many things at once. “What’s wrong?” 
“Nothing, I’m fine,” You answered, giving him a weak smile, and then immediately changed the subject so that he wouldn’t question you further right then. “How’d it go with Ally? That’s her name, right?” 
“Yeah, it is. But, that ask-out completely crashed and failed because she said that she just started dating someone.” 
“Oh, sorry,” You told him, not because you actually felt it, but because it simply felt like the right thing to say at that moment. 
“It’s fine,” Eddie shrugged. “What’s the dumb saying? There’s other fish in the sea or whatever.”
You let out a forced kind of laugh. “Yup, right.” 
“You sure you’re okay?”
For a second, you considered lying again; it would’ve been the best and simplest thing to do. You could’ve said that you weren’t feeling well and you needed to just head back outside and get some air— you should’ve just said that. But then, suddenly, all you could think was fuck it.
“I can’t do this.” 
He looked at you, confused. “Do what?”
“Be friends with you. I can’t go back to how things were with us before we dated. And I know that I have been doing it for the past two months, but I can’t anymore.”
“But, we decided—”
“I know,” You interrupted him. “I know what we decided, but that doesn’t mean that it’s been easy to do this. To just turn off my feelings and pretend that I’m not still in love with you.”
Surprisingly, it actually felt good to finally be honest about everything that you had forced yourself to bury over the past few months. It felt as if a weight was being lifted off of your shoulders. 
“It’s not easy for me either.” 
You couldn’t help but scoff and roll your eyes at Eddie’s words. “Yeah, because talking to Ally out there looked really painful and hard for you.” 
“That doesn’t…” He trailed off as he shook his head. “That doesn’t mean anything. I promise. It doesn’t mean that I don’t miss you, or us.” 
“Then why are we even doing this right now? What’s the point?”
You two had somehow moved away from the stairs and instead were standing further down the hallway, closer to the bathroom that you had left barely two minutes ago. 
“I just,” Eddie began and then sighed. “I know it’s gonna hurt like hell letting you go in a few months, and maybe doing it this way is easier. It’s not at all easy, but maybe it’s better? I don’t know. Most of the time it feels so fucking stupid, and I feel like an idiot for what I did that night… But, maybe it was the right thing to do.”
You considered his words for a moment. Just like that night two months ago, a part of you could recognize that he was at least a little right. But, this time you decided against leaning into the small part of you that wanted to simply agree with him because it made things seem “easy.”
“You know me,” You ultimately said, stepping a little closer and finding his hand. “I overthink everything. I think about every possible outcome for any and every situation. But, this is the one thing that I don’t want to think that far ahead about. And maybe that’s stupid. And maybe we will end up feeling terribly heartbroken at the end of the summer, and we’ll regret not just leaving things like they are right now. But, I’d rather that, than to keep pretending that everything is fine and normal. Somehow that feels so much worse. Why can’t we just enjoy this, us, for what it is before we have to give it up?”
Eddie didn’t say anything at first and that worried you. You braced yourself for the inevitable rejection, and you were already telling yourself that you would be okay with it because at least you tried this time around— you had finally said the words that you wished you’d said that night. 
But then he was kissing you. It was abrupt and sudden and you hadn’t seen it coming, even though it was exactly what you wanted to happen. He was pulling his hand away from yours and immediately reaching up to cup your face in both of his hands. They were cold, but you still felt as if you were on fire. 
It was probably only him that could affect you this much and this easily. You didn’t realize how much you missed the feel of his mouth on yours and how much you missed having him close to you in this way until it was finally, finally happening again. 
Your mind briefly traveled back to the last time this happened. It was the night before the breakup and the two of you were smoking weed in your backyard, sandwiched together in one patio chair instead of sitting in separate ones because it just felt right to do, and the close proximity allowed your lips to easily find his.
“I love you,” Eddie mumbled against your mouth now, which also reminded you of that last time. “I’m sorry I made us lose the past two months.”
Your hands were fisting themselves into his black t-shirt, pulling him impossibly closer to you. “It’s okay. Doesn’t matter.”
And technically, it really didn’t, at least not in your head. You were just glad to be here in this moment with him. It wasn’t too late. You two still had time. 
“It’ll be okay,” You told him in between kisses. Maybe you two should have found a bedroom or simply moved anywhere that was out of the dark hallway and away from potential prying eyes, but that didn’t feel like the most important thing to do right then. “Whatever happens in the end. It’ll be okay.” 
Eddie was nodding as he pressed you back against the wall and his hands dropped to your waist. “Okay.”
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
let me know ur thoughts<333
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xamag-draws · 5 months
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BBR thoughts 2024
Since I mentioned that I finally dusted off an old project of mine and was ruminating on how I'd remake it, I thought I'd elaborate a little, now that I've solidified some concepts. For funsies
This is gonna be a bit of a long and unfocused one, but I don't share my personal thoughts here often, especially the stuff about my projects I always marinate in. And for once it's something that people have existing context for, so hey why not
So for anyone who hasn't been following me for a gajillion years, The Black Brick Road of OZ was a webcomic that I posted around 2013-2015, back when I was in highschool going on college (which is kinda crazy to think about). It was sort of a darker twist on The Wonderful Wizard of Oz, although I definitely leaned a lot more into dark humor more than anything in those first few chapters
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I don't think it's available to read anywhere anymore, and I know people have been asking me about it. So here's the full proper archive of BBR, as full as it can be with deceased Flash
I totally used it as an excuse to shamelessly and self-indulgently experiment. It had interactive pages and GIFs and was wayyy too overproduced for what I could handle or what was necessary, but I did have great fun making it while it lasted
Unfortunately, that excess and the fact that I've changed too much as a person by the time I was in college is what ultimately killed it. The direction I wanted to go in was practically unrecognizable from the original idea started back in 2011, so there were many old hold-ups that I felt ruined it
At the time I kinda wished I could start/rewrite it all over, but considering that I pretty much had the entire script done at that point, it felt like a pointless sisyphean task. So I just put it on a shelf and didn't look back for about 8 years, because I didn't know what else to do
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Now to be fair, the nature of my art has always been iterative and cyclical; when I feel like my creative juices have run dry I prefer to leave a project to marinate and move on to something else; cycle through other old things and bring in new skills and perspectives into the mix when I'm ready again. Not very productive, but it is what makes me happy to work on my OCs; I'm doomed to hit a wall with them eventually and I need some time to be able to find a new direction
So that said, I'm glad that BBR was left to marinate for that long. I don't think I was prepared, emotionally or intellectually, to tackle it again until now. The Wizard of Oz book (and the entire series of them, really) has always been near and dear to my heart, but there's a lot of context around it that I'm only unpacking now that I'm older
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I think I always inherently feel negatively about the stuff I've made in the past, like its faults always jump out to me more than the positives, especially the more time passes. I've never liked that, and I do really appreciate the kind things people have to say about BBR to this day. The fact that it still can be recognized and remembered is very sweet
When I left it, I already found it "kinda cringe", and that feeling only deepened with years. When I took my first look back at it, asking the question "how would I rewrite it now?", at first I took a very cynical approach, as in "everything would have to be torn down"
But the more I sat on it, the more I found that I still see some merit and charm in the ideas I was putting out; I just didn't know how to execute them at the time (not to pretend that I know what I'm doing now, but I certainly know more at least). Turns out a lot of my old concepts could be changed substantially with just a few small tweaks. So I'd say that's a nicer way to think about my previous work
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If you haven't seen yet, I posted a first draft of my new designs for some of the characters (the main group, the Goods and the Wickeds). Definitely subject to change, but more or less how I see them now
I'm just playing with these concepts; by no means would I attempt to remake BBR right this moment. Call it a pipe dream among my other ones. But just for fun, this is the direction I'd like to take:
Nowadays I'd probably make it a visual novel, with more emphasis on the visual part than the novel because I'm no English prose writer by any means. It'd still let me play a little with the interactivity while helping cut some corners on the drawing part (only some, I imagine I'd go hog wild anyway)
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I've always intended for some events inspired by the sequel books to take place in BBR's past. Stuff like Jinjur's revolt or Ozma's rule preceeds the main events here. So I think it would be fun to follow the past of a few key characters alongside the main story. One chapter focusing on the present quest to see the Wizard, then one focusing on the past events (that are maybe reflective thematically); rinse and repeat
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I'm also sticking a little closer to the original text in some regards. Not everything that I enjoy from the books would be translated here, it's still just a very loose fantasy on the material; but I'd like to be closer in spirit at least
I like mature, wise and powerful Glinda, I like kind and vulnerable Tin Man, I like the Wizard being a pathetic yet loveable liar, so I'm sprinkling in more of that for example
I'd like to keep some whimsy, but make it more grounded and a bit more serious to be coherent in tone. I think the original TWWOOZ book was a more realistic fantasy in some ways, even for the standards of the time; I like its simple but vivid tactile descriptions and details like bringing attention that Dorothy needed to eat and sleep
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I find it funny that Baum specifically was averse to making his books scary or unpleasant, finding that unnecessary for telling a compelling kids story, but they still can get pretty dark and disturbing, at least for our modern sensibilities. Let's just say that I intend to use the Evoldo and Chopfyt storylines for my purposes. In that way, I feel like a "darker" Wizard of Oz retelling can still mostly be tonally in line with the original and balance it with enough heart and occasional humor
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I slowly grew to appreciate the quaint old-timey quality of the original series, as well. The first book is both timeless and very much a product of the 1900s. Originally I tried to give it a little modern or at least anachronistic spin, but it was moreso because it's what I knew best, so these days I'd rather intentionally lean into the time period. Still not fully historically accurate by any means, but at least directly acknowledging the influence
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The events of the story span across 40 years of these characters' lives, so I'm drawing inspiration from the entire so-called La Belle Epoque: the time period around 1880s-1920s. Basically I'm cooking, and my soup is old Victorian fashion morphing into Edwardian fashion and slowly inching towards flappers
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Some new Dolly outfits
Lots of crazy things, political changes and innovations were happening at the turn of the century, which I think is noted and reflected by Baum in the books as well; the character of Tik-Tok might not blow any minds now, but he was one of the first robot characters in literature at that point; and don't even get me started on Jinjur, etc. Plenty of really interesting stuff one could lightly ponder in an Oz adaptation these days
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Aesthetically, art nouveau has always been a big artistic influence for me, and it'd definitely be its time to shine here. John R. Neill's illustrations of the Oz books often keep me company as well. Nouveau architecture in particular fits that fairytale whimsy extremely well imo
I'd allow myself a little bit of art deco here and there, but ultimately its intimidating geometrical splendor is an antithetical to the flowery nature of nouveau and I associate it with a completely different era. Definitely fitting some characters like my Wicked Witch of the West, but shouldn't be overused
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One of my main problems with the original BBR was that eventually I lost track of what it was even about; and the original ending felt too mean and unfulfilling to be worth it. Now I'd like to stick to the theme of home and family as my main theme, but in a different, more bittersweet way than in the book
An interesting connection I made is that a lot of my aforementioned older key characters (the Witches, Jinjur, the Nome King, etc) all came from the same reformatory as kids, that's how they know each other. In my recent research I learned that in those reformatories it was usually frowned upon to release the children back to the families, which were seen as the original corrupting influence regardless of the circumstance. The reformatory did everything in its power to cut that connection and make itself the only family those wayward kids were supposed to know and love. That's an unexpected tie into the theme of home that I'd like to explore as well
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So yeah that's the current state of it. I have a bunch of outfit concepts I'm slowly cooking, although I'm now sure whether I'd post them... But I do miss these funny guys, and I'm glad some people still do as well :)
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the-roo-too · 3 months
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messy -> best friend! kang haerin
-“don’t ruin this for yourself.” as if she could do so more than she already did. what would happen to her friendship? what about her members? what about the group’s future? “play the part, date for a month. go on three dates and wait until they have a comeback. you can break up after that.”
warnings: haerin briefly has a boyfriend; foul language
genre: crack; friends to lovers
notes: i kinda yolo’d this, not proofread
*ೃ༄
haerin’s date didn’t exactly go as planned. her now ex-partner dropped her off at her dorms after the short outing, making the atmosphere even more awkward.
“so…” he made a finger gun gesture at her and smiled softly. “we’ll still keep in touch?”
haerin almost felt bad then. she was, after all, the one who broke things off. keeping in touch with your ex could go many ways, especially in this industry. “we’ll see. i told you, i think im gonna have to focus more on being an idol, kim…”
before the boy could say another word, she slammed the doors in his face. was it a nice thing to do? nope. but she was tired, with the comeback still fresh she couldn’t see herself being in a legitimate relationship.
“kim? is that your boyfriend’s last name?” haerin jumped upon hearing hanni’s voice. she swiftly swept past the older girl, hoping to close the conversation quickly.
“no, he’s not.”
“sure he isn’t.”
the older girl clearly missed the way haerin stormed off grumpily, consumed with the thought of catching her bandmate and her partner. if only she knew.
that night haerin texted her best friend—kim y/n. another idol, a member of young posse. the two used to be trainees together back in the day, before y/n decided her luck at a different company, and debuted soon after.
her phone set to the lowest brightness, it was still almost blinding.
haerinnie
u up?
y/n 🩷
yesssss
y/n 🩷
shouldn’t you be asleep tho?
y/n 🩷
i talked with yoona unnie the other day and she said you guys would be appearing on music bank
haerinnie
i know
haerin hesitated a little. not even her best friend knew of her (now ex) boyfriend. their relationship was extremely short—maybe two months? only her manager knew of him, as she had to mention going out and meeting ‚a kim’. fortunately there’s a lot of kim’s in the industry.
haerinnie
i guess i just wanted to talk with my best friend
y/n 🩷
omg
y/n 🩷
are you admitting in your best friend
haerinnie
no
haerinnie
im informing you
y/n 🩷
i’m honoured
haerinnie
you should be
y/n 🩷
that’s the main reason you texted me?
haerinnie
wanna hang this week?
y/n 🩷
omg yes
y/n 🩷
we’ll get over the details in the morning now go eep
y/n 🩷
ily
haerinnie
ilyt
*ೃ༄
a couple days pass after the breakup. haerin met with you two days after that, just a cutesy hang out in a cafe. now, haerin woke up to minji shaking her shoulders in disbelief.
“it was a girl?!”
the younger newjeans member rubbed her eyes in confusion. “wha… girl?”
“the kim!”
“what kim?”
at that moment, hanni ran into the room the younger shared with their ‘leader’. “why didn’t you tell me it wasn’t a boyfriend!”
haerin sat up slowly, glancing at her both members like they grew a second head. “what.”
“the guy? girl! a couple days ago your girlfriend dropped you of! i think?” hanni was definitely being delusional. maybe this was all a dream?
“what is happening…?” she asked in a small voice, looking lost in the whole situation. minji pulled out her phone, opening x and her private account. she pulled up a post and haerin’s eyes widened.
KANG HAERIN AND KIM Y/N SPOTTED ON A RUMOURED DATE.
there was a whole article, but the most important part were the pictures someone took of you two on that outing. she couldn’t believe her eyes.
that wasn’t the end of it though.
ADOR CONFIRMS THE DATING RUMOURS BETWEEN NEWJEAN’S HAERIN AND YOUNG POSSE’S Y/N.
haerin’s soul left her body. she must’ve been dreaming. how does one wake up to their company confirming an untrue rumour?
“manager-nim wants you to go with him to the company. you’re gonna have a meeting there, but we expect an explanation too.” minji snapped her out of her head, gesturing to her and hanni.
“y-yeah, sure…” the rest of her getting ready went by a blur. her members had questions, but she was debatably even more confused by the whole situation.
later on during the meeting, haerin could barely get a word in. there was so much happening all at once. her manager was just sitting there, his head in his hands, some pr specialist was drafting up a whole plan of where to go and when while she just sat there, mindlessly listening to the conversation.
why did they confirm the rumour?
“why was the rumour confirmed…?” she finally spoke up. all heads snapped in her direction and she winced internally.
“is that not what you would have wanted?” haerin’s manager gestured to his phone. she then remembered how hard normally coming out would be. could this be considered a hard launch? “you’re everywhere. and most idols dream of having the chance to go public with their relationship.”
“i’m not in a relationship.”
her manager blinked slowly. she could almost see the wheels turning in his head. “what?”
“i’m not in a relationship. especially not with y/n.” that last part felt forceful. they might’ve gotten the wrong idea. haerin wasn’t homophobic or anything—she just really wasn’t in a relationship with the girl.
one of the coordinators held up his pen, pointing it at the photo dispatch got of her and you. she could silently admit the picture was cute, if it wasn’t for the circumstances she’d send it to you. “you two were on a date.”
“we’re friends. i meet up with her every couple weeks.”
haerin almost jumped at her manager standing up all of a sudden. he placed his hand on his forehead in a gesture of defeat before speaking. “…it was a boy, right? the kim you were meeting lately.”
“yes.” she nodded slowly. “we’re not together anymore too. but it was a boy, not y/n.”
dots slowly connected with her head. kim y/n. how stupid of her to foolishly believe her manager would just forget about the person she told him she’d dated. and for her best friend to have the same last name?
“it’s not like we can suddenly deny it. we have to send some representatives to dsp media though. we’ve confirmed it, so we’re gonna get a bad image if they deny it. get someone to look into that. meeting concluded.”
shortly after that, people started leaving the room. haerin still sat there, awkwardly fidgeting with her phone, ignoring her manager’s gaze on her.
“i can text her, right?” it wasn’t a secret relationship or anything. well, it wasn’t a relationship to begin with. why would she call it that? “i mean, does she know?”
“i’m sure y/n knows, as you do. it’s not like news like that are dismissed by the public.” her manger pointed out the obvious. he had an annoying habit of doing that. she fought the urge to roll her eyes. “you know that, don’t you.” of course she did.
“what about my members?” minji would have her head. hanni too. danielle too, probably. maybe hyein not. maybe? no, her too.
“what about them?” haerin wished she could just disappear. what an absurd situation to find oneself tangled up in. “as far as everyone is concerned, you’re in a happy relationship with kim y/n, young posse’s member. if only she was a boy.”
“why would she need to be a boy?” she knew. of course she did. all that nonsense about queer people in the industry.
“you know that.” she couldn’t argue, even if she’d tried. “i do.”
“don’t ruin this for yourself.” as if she could do so more than she already did. what would happen to her friendship? what about her members? what about the group’s future? “play the part, date for a month. go on three dates and wait until they have a comeback. you can break up after that.”
they just had a comeback, haerin thought. stupid dispatch. “i’ll text her.” her. what about her ex? she should feel bad, now it looks like she was cheating on him because they broke up a week ago. “what about…?”
“about?” a pointed look from her made the manager nod in understanding. “the boy. i’ll look into it. solve what you have to do.”
there’s a lot of things to resolve here.
*ೃ༄
colour drained from your face the moment you woke up in the middle of the night (to be fair, it was more around 4), your phone buzzing with notifications. safe to say, you ran to meet with the ceo as quickly as you could.
to make matters worse, haerin wasn’t replying to your texts. you were so lost in that moment—what dating rumour? why was no one saying anything?
“so.” you looked up, wincing internally at the glare your manager sent your way. god bless the others were still asleep. how could you explain this later though? “got any thoughts you want to share?”
“yeah.” you slowly leaned back in the chair, trying to relax. nothing big, just your first scandal. maybe you could play it off, that shouldn’t be too hard? “this feels like i’m being scolded by my teacher…”
“this is not the time, y/n.” your ceo spoke up. you slowly nodded your head, that might’ve been the truth. it wasn’t your fault you reacted to stressful situations with awkwardness.
“i don’t- me and haerin aren’t together, i don’t even think she’s…” it doesn’t feel like it, does it? she’s only ever showed you pictures of ‘cute boys’. “you know.”
“maybe-“ your phone buzzing aggressively for the second time that day cut you off. you glanced at the other people in the room, quietly apologising for the disturbance.
“no, check it. maybe it’s a follow up to the dispatch post?” nodding to agree with the ceo, you checked the notifications and your face went pale.
“they… ador confirmed it…?” your phone was snatched out of your hand as your manager hovered over you. “what’s going on?”
“they sure did.” the ceo placed his hands on his temples, rubbing them gently. the situation was starting to look worse and worse. what on earth was happening? “get someone to contact hybe. it’s still early, so we should be able to play off not responding right away. and you-“ his glare settled on you, making a shiver run down your spine. “contact that haerin. ask her to sort out whatever the fuck this is.”
“yessir.” oh yeah, haerin had a lot of explaining to do.
*ೃ༄
as it turned out, resolving all of that had to wait until you could peacefully leave your dorm. just a couple hours after ador confirmed the news, a bunch of (concerningly old) bunnies gathered outside your dorm. damn sasaengs. scratch that, damn creepy adult newjeans’s fans.
your manager was arranging some additional security to drive you away from the dorm, but he told you to play along with the rumour for now. that meant lying to your members. you were sneakily glancing through the window when the leader of your group suddenly appeared behind you.
you jumped slightly at sunhye’s sudden appearance. “i told the rest not to bother you for now. must be hard, huh?”
“…” your eyes followed her figure as she leaned on the windowsill next to you and also observed the crowd below you. “aren’t you mad?”
“i’m frustrated. partially with you, but i understand it’s not your fault, y/n. i just thought you’d tell us if you were in a relationship.” she gave you a pointed glare and you hummed softly. sunhye was getting suspicious of the whole situation, but you’d let her. haerin first—then you could argue with others.
“we didn’t mean for it to go that way. the relationship was still fresh too…” that was your best bet. you could play it as if you two only recently started dating.
“okay.” sunhye nodded her head with a small sigh before a soft smile appeared on her lips. “i’m happy for you. the girls-“ she gestured with her head subtly towards the bedrooms. “i’m sure they’re happy too. just be careful, okay?”
“i will, unnie…” your phone buzzed, information you of a new message. it was your manager telling you to take the lift downstairs and wait for him there. “i have to go..”
“good luck.”
“hm.” you rushed to the elevator, grabbing a face mask, pair of sunglasses and a cap on your way out. would hiding your face now change a lot? no, but it was still better to be safe than sorry—oh, the irony.
you saw a green mark appear next to haerin’s icon, signalling she was finally active. three dots appeared next to her user as she started typing. you sighed softly, pressing the ground level button in the lift.
haerinnie
we have to meet up
y/n 🩷
we sure do?
y/n 🩷
you’ve got some explaining to do.
haerinnie
i know
the elevator doors slid open with a small ding and you were greeted with your manager waiting for you. behind him stood a couple guys and a girl you’d recognise as your makeup artist. you quirked your brow softly before glancing at the man.
“public appearance.” he replied shortly before ushering you to move.
haerinnie
meet me at xxx in 20? i promise we’ll talk there
y/n 🩷
see you there
you gave your manager the address and before you knew it, your small group (meaning the security, manager and makeup artist) were all loaded into a car. somehow you managed to slip through the sea of newjeans fans.
the girl immediately told you to take off your mask and the rest of your ‘identity protection’ gear so she could start working on your face. when you gave a questioning look to the manager, he sighed and replied. “you’re going on a date for all the media knows. your relationship just has been confirmed. ador sent out representatives to talk to as just after the meeting and it might’ve been an honest mistake on both sides, but the both of you will have to keep it up.”
“honest mistake?” how can someone confirm a relationship and then call it an honest mistake.
“young posse will have a comeback sooner than we initially assumed.” he licks his lips before continuing. “you’re free to break up then. the scandal will keep both of the groups relevant for now, even if the event was a mistake.”
by the time you realised how absurd all of that sounded, you’ve arrived at the meet-up place. you could see haerin sitting inside, as as her best friend you could recognise her in the stupidest disguise.
“keep in touch. we’ll leave as not to attract any more unnecessary attention.” you nodded at the manager weakly and sneaked inside the little cafe before anyone could try to spot you.
haerin lifted her head before giving you a weak smile as your approached her table. “hi there…”
“what the fuck?” you realised there was a better way to approach the subject, but you were too tired to give a damn. “why would ador confirm the news?“
“it’s my fault.” with the way she groaned and hid her face in her hands at your reaction, you must’ve looked like you were about to murder someone. “your last name is ‘kim’. i used to date this boy who’s last name was also-“
“you had a boyfriend?!” you didn’t know if anything could surprise you anymore. your best friend had a boyfriend she never told you about and now she was in a supposed relationship with you. how crazy could life get?
“we broke up.” she nervously avoided your gaze as she spoke. “we were together for only a while… i thought we might click but he wasn’t really all that. and i wanted to focus on my career. but we’re besides the point.”
haerin pulled out her phone and showed you the article again. the header presented both of your full names.
“my manager knew i was dating ‘a kim’. i never told him who it was just because i thought it was too soon to introduce him officially. when this-“ she gestured to the article again. “came out, he just assumed it was whom i was meeting the past couple weeks. they didn’t consult me, just confirmed everything quickly.”
you slowly nodded along to everything she said. her explanation made sense and it wasn’t technically her fault, like you initially assumed. the situation was brutally messy, but knowing your best friend didn’t loose her mind made you feel better.
“what do we do now?” you finally asked. she fidgeted with her hands before looking around the cafe. of course there must’ve been a camera here—someone was always on the lookout for gossip. haerin leaned close to your face, from the side it looked like she was kissing your cheek.
“we play along.” she whispered. “give it some time. people will forget and then we can ‘officially break up’.”
sure. that sounded fair.
*ೃ༄
there was a small flaw in the plan as it later turned out. for starters, people didn’t forget. on the contrary—after the initial shock died down and you stopped getting random threats on the internet, the fans started showing you two a lot of love. #y/nrin and #y/n&haerin were trending all over the social medias.
that meant you two couldn’t just hope for them to move on and then break up.
there was also another small problem. see, while haerin told you she wasn’t truly interested in any relationship now, you were quite the opposite. a hopeless romantic, if you would. and your best friend was such a caring fake girlfriend…
it wasn’t entirely your fault you fell for her. she wasn’t making this easy. deep down you knew she was most likely straight and wouldn’t go for you. you did the best thing you could come up with—distance yourself from her.
the consequences of your actions came to bite you sooner than you’d expected as after three days of ‘postponing’ your fake dates with haerin, you found minji angrily banging at your dorm doors.
a little groggily, you let the leader of newjeans inside before she basically slammed you against the doors. “y/n!”
“w-what?!” her semi aggressive behaviour made you wake up fully. she looked pissed and you made a mental note not to ever anger her like that again. “what happened?”
“haerin is sad because of you.” she said simply, as if expecting you had a good explanation.
“huh?” you tilted your head to the side and minji looked like she wanted to be anywhere else but there. “what do you mean…”
“she let it slip that you’ve been ghosting her, y/n. now i don’t know the details but you don’t get to hurt my band made just because.” you nervously grinned at her. haerin was sad because of you? sure, you were her best friend, but before all of this, you’d only meet up every couple weeks.
“i’ll talk to her-“
“you better.” minji let you go and left the dorm as quickly as she appeared there. you decided that you owned her this much at least. it was better to come clean, no? maybe you two could have an actual reason to ‘break up’ if you talked with haerin.
y/n 🩷
meet me at our cafe in 10? please?
it took a couple minutes for haerin to reply. you didn’t know if she was purposely ignoring you to give you a taste of your own medicine.
haerinnie
why should i
y/n 🩷
please
haerinnie
you’ve been ignoring me
haerinnie
why should i agree to something for you
y/n 🩷
i’ll explain myself, i promise
y/n 🩷
just come there?
another two minutes passed and you were starting to lose hope. maybe she got more annoyed than you initially assumed.
haerinnie
be there in 10
you hurried to the cafe too. saying it was a 10 minutes walk from your dorm was a stretch, but your friendship was on the line. your leader yelled something after your when you were leaving the dorm, but you didn’t hear her. there were more important things than being an idol in that moment.
the bell above the doors dinged quietly when you finally made it inside the small coffee shop. you saw haerin sitting there, but she didn’t bother looking up at you.
“you’re late.” her tone was a little colder than usual. the same voice she used to talk with everyone—but you weren’t like everyone, you were her best friend.
“i’m sorry…” she finally looked up when she heard you practically hyperventilating. you ran there as fast as you could, and now you needed a moment to regain your breathing. “i-i should’ve said 20 minutes…”
you saw a ghost of a smile appear on her lips before she cleared her throat. “i ordered your favourite… it should be here soon.”
you plopped down on the chair in front of her, nodding your head in a grateful manner. even annoyed, haerin was a caring individual. “i’ll pay you back later.”
“no need.” she straightened in her seat. haerin wanted answers and she wanted them now. “just tell me. what did i do?”
“what?” she wasn’t seriously thinking it was because of her, was she?
“did i hurt you or something?”
“no, haerin! i-“ you leaned your face on your palms. it was hard to explain without bluntly giving yourself away. “you didn’t do anything wrong. i swear on my group.”
“then what is it. i know you, y/n. you don’t just do shit like that unless something happened.”
she knew you too well for her own good. did she knew you liked girls too? did she knew she was the prettiest girl in your eyes? “haerin, i don’t… i don’t want out friendship to end because of this.”
“hm?” her eyes widened subtly. she tilted her head to the side, looking like a cat. oh how you hated how cute she was sometimes. “i’m not following.”
“haerin… i like you.”
“i like you too.” she nodded to herself. “you’re my best friend. dani almost got mad over the fact that i said you’re my best friend and she’s-“
“haerin.” you placed your hand on hers, gently drifting her attention back to you. she looked into your eyes, and you saw a sudden flash of understanding. “i like like you. i don’t want to fake date you.”
she stayed silent. her eyes slowly blinking at you as if she was processing the information. that wasn’t the response you were hoping for. she was supposed to say something. anything. you felt your eyes stinging, tears slowly appearing in them before she spoke up.
“okay.” haerin nodded to herself again.
“okay?” what kind of response is that?
“is this a date then?”
“haerin, i just confessed to you-“
“okay.” she repeated, this time with a small smile on her face. “you’re easy to fall for, y/n. or at least i think that. i don’t know if i like like you yet… but i think i want to date you too.”
“…really?” you couldn’t stop the grin from appearing on your face. “100% serious?”
“yes. but i’m paying for the date.”
“i asked you out tho!”
“and you were late.”
*ೃ༄
382 notes · View notes
indigogvf · 10 months
Text
Need
Word count: 6.8k
Warnings: mentions of SA!!! smut (minors dni), alcohol. If I missed anything please let me know!
Summary: You and Jake have never seen eye to eye, but when a guy creeps you out at his house party, does that change?
A/N: awful summary lol sorry I’m so tired and have been wanting to post this for ages. This is not as good as I wanted it to be, or as long, but I do not have the patience for that. For some reason the ideas were just not flowing for this fic, so I feel like it’s kinda jumpy. Sorry about that!! Also, my requests are open!! Anyway, enough of me yapping. Enjoy!!
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This was not your thing; parties. It’s not that you hated them, but a nine pm bed time meant a lot more to you. Drinking made you sleepy. However, parties are especially not your thing when Jake is there. Even more so when they’re hosted at his house.
Much like tonight.
You can’t deny Josh’s puppy dog eyes for very long though, and you weren’t going to let one person ruin your night. He’s hosting the party anyway, so he has much more important things to worry about than trying to piss you off. You thought.
You thought wrong. As always.
The night begun smoothly. You felt confident and sexy, your dress hugging you in all the right places. You weren’t planning on getting into anyones pants tonight, but it felt nice to know you could. With that being said, you also felt nervous. You and Jake couldn’t get along at all; you can be civil when needs be, but it never lasts long. If you can’t get along sober, you doubt adding copious amounts of alcohol is going to have a positive impact.
You made your rounds of everyone, making sure to say hi to the people you knew; also making sure to keep well away from Jake. You and Jake have been holding the battle of “who can be the meanest” for quite some time now, and you honestly can’t even remember how it started, but you strongly disliked him. You’re both extremely stubborn, so as much as you feel bad for feuding with your best friends’ brother, you wouldn’t be caught dead making amends. And neither would he.
Obviously your first point of call after saying hello was getting yourself a nice, strong drink. A necessity, in your opinion. Definitely a necessity when jake’s around. You’d already lost Josh, who you came with, and you were now left to fend for yourself. You did know a good amount of people, but everyone knew everyone else more than you knew them, so you weren’t really sure where to start.
You wondered back to the main event, scouring the room for someone you know well enough to join their conversation. As you were looking around, you caught the eyes of Jake. His shirt was buttoned up by two buttons, max. You couldn’t quite see due to the darkness of the room. Speaking of, he’s wearing sunglasses. What a douchebag you thought. I mean, seriously? Sunglasses? In an almost pitch black room?
His hair was falling nicely, though. The sunglasses were giving his hair something to flow against, and it was framing his face well. It doesn’t matter how much you hate him, you will always be jealous of his hair.
He smirks at you, mischief written all over his face. You roll your eyes and move on. You promised Josh you wouldn’t argue with Jake tonight, and you really did feel bad. You know how hard it is for them to navigate this.
However, Jake had other intentions. He started walking over; you knew you were well within your rights to walk away, but you also knew that this would happen at some point, so you might as well get it over and done with.
“You look cute.” He mentioned sarcastically, gesturing to your dress.
“Thanks. Wish I could say the same about you.” You retorted with an eye roll, taking a step away from him. You wanted as much distance between you as possible.
“Oh, c’mon. You and I both know you like what you see.” He suggested with a cocky smirk, pointing at himself. He took a step closer, closing the space between you that you had just made.
“Seriously? You have that big of an ego? Take a look at yourself for once. You’re wearing sunglasses in a dimly lit room. Could you look like more of a dick?” You replied, taking a sip of your drink. You knew he enjoyed this a lot more than you did; you were easier to piss off.
“Look at myself? Look at you! You look like you’re begging to take someone home in that dress.” He laughed, throwing his head back. ‘Always so dramatic’ you thought.
“Yeah? Well at least I could take someone home if I wanted to, which I don’t, for the record. You can’t, not when you look like as much of an uptight prick as you.” You argued. You felt like steam was coming out of your ears. He always had to dig deep. Every time.
He began responding, but you had already started walking away. Like you said, you’d promised Josh you wouldn’t argue with him tonight, so you really didn’t want it to go any further.
You spot danny and Sam and take this opportunity to distract yourself. “hey guys, you having fun?” You asked as you waved at them.
“Hey y/n, did Josh ditch you? Already?” Sam queried, turning to face you. Danny sniggered beside him in response.
“Well, yeah. But I promise that’s not why I came to chat.” You knew that whatever Sam was suggesting was just a joke, but you also knew that if Josh hadn’t of ditched you, the overwhelming joy you felt when you saw them probably wouldn’t have been as intense.
“Yeah, whatever. How’s things with Jake? I see you’ve continued your feud.” Danny joined, subtly looking over to Sam. They know exactly how to wind you up. You will never understand how they find the humour in this situation; if it was the other way round, you would’ve grown impatient a long time ago.
“Yeah, but that’s done for the night. I’m really not in the mood for it to carry on tonight.” You said as you grabbed your drink to take another sip, taking a seat next to danny.
“Are you ever in the mood for jake, though? You say that every time, and every time the feud continues.” Sam giggled.
“You know, he’s right. How did this ‘feud’ even start? I can’t quite remember.” Danny said. Him and Sam were now laughing a little too hard considering how unfunny their comments were. At least you didn’t find them funny.
“You know what guys, maybe I will carry it on. Just for you.” You remarked, pointing your finger at both of them to further emphasis your point.
“Oh, we would love to see that.” Laughed Danny, turning to face you completely.
“Maybe you should just fuck it out. I mean, if all of our mutual friends can agree on that, maybe we’re right.” Sam added, without laughing. He was serious. He seriously suggested you ‘fuck it out’. With his brother.
“You guys suck. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to grab another drink.” You began walking away as they laughed; obviously happy with themselves for managing to wind you up.
You made your way into the kitchen, your eyes landing on a guy stood in the corner. You smiled politely as you walked past him to make your next drink. “You on your own?” He asked. Are. You. Serious. You thought. You were not in the mood for this.
“Uh, no. My friends are just in the living room, where everyone else is.” You said bluntly. You hoped that gave him the hint that you were definitely not interested.
Obviously, it didn’t.
“Your ass looks beautiful in that dress.” He said boldly as he took a step closer, looking you up and down.
“Thanks, but I’m not looking for any of that tonight.” You smiled in an attempt to soften the blow, whilst taking a step back.
“C’mon, you can’t wear a dress like that and not want some attention.” He laughed, reaching his hand out to brush your arm. You quickly retracted.
You were starting to panic slightly as it was clear he wasn’t getting the hint. “I’m okay, really.” You reiterated, taking another step back. You were now against the counter, awaiting his next move.
As he started to take a step towards you, Jake walked into the kitchen, pausing as he witnesses the guy come closer to you; again trying to reach out and touch your arm. He flicks his eyes to you, and you look at him with pleading eyes. You really hope he can see what you’re trying to tell him.
“Hey, what are you doing, man?” Jake asked, flicking his eyes between you as he walked further into the kitchen.
“That’s none of your business, man.” He mocks, drawing his attention back to you.
“It is when it’s my house. Did she tell you she was interested in you before you cornered her?” He asked, his tone dripping with sarcasm. He folded his arms and leaned on the counter, raising his eyebrows as he impatiently waited for his response.
“Well, I- no, but-“
“Enough said. Get off of her and get out of my house.” He spoke with a steady tone, pushing himself off of the counter and moving out of the way, further prompting the guy to leave.
You breathed out, not even realising you were holding your breath. “Thank you so much.” You sighed, running your hands over your face as you tried to ground yourself.
“Yeah, are you okay? Did anything else happen?” He asked with panic laced in his voice. He walked over to you and moved his eyes over you to check that you were okay.
You looked up at him. His eyes were laced with concern and worry; they looked softer, It was different. He always looked at you with such annoyance, but you liked this. “I’m okay. Thank you, Jake.” You replied. You really were okay, but unwanted men coming onto you will never get less daunting.
“I’m sorry that happened. If you need anything, you let me know. My bedroom is upstairs to the right if you need some quiet.” He said softly as he ran his hand through his hair, letting it fall back into place.
You were taken back, to say the least. You and Jake were never nice to each other unless absolutely necessary, but even then you were still throwing dirty looks around like there was no tomorrow. It was a moment of clarity. You would see Jake acting somewhat similarly to others; always so kind and caring. But never towards you. You wondered what it would be like to not dislike him so much, and to actually get along with him. Although this only gave you a small taste of that, you liked this a lot more than hating him. You still hated him though. You’re way too stubborn to admit that you might like him, even to yourself.
“Thanks. I’m okay, I promise. I always get shaken up when this type of stuff happens. I just need another drink.” You laughed a little, trying to soften the mood slightly. You picked up your cup and started to fiddle with it. You felt too awkward just standing there.
“Yeah, sure. Help yourself. Do you want me to stay with you and then help you find josh? So you’re not on your own again?” He suggested as he walked past you to get a drink out of the fridge.
What the fuck? You thought. You knew Jake could be nice, but you never expected him to be this caring. Not in a million years.
“Uh, yeah, actually. Would that be okay? I don’t want to steal you from your own party.” You mumbled, starting to pour a concoction of various kinds of alcohol into your cup.
“Of course. I know where he is, so it shouldn’t take long.” He reassured you with a soft smile, brushing past you to find a bottle opener for his drink.
You grabbed your drink and went with Jake to find Josh. Once you found him, you said your thank you’s to Jake and walked over to Josh.
“Was that Jake? Were you just with Jake? Did you just smile at Jake?” He asked, an excited grin on his face. He got up from his seat, eager to find out if your battle with Jake has finally ended or not.
“Yes, yes, and yes. Some guy was being a massive creep and Jake saw and kicked him out. He was really sweet, actually. It was weird.” You said, taking a sip of your drink whilst stealing Josh’s seat.
“Does this mean you both like each other?” He said, completely disregarding the small mention of the creepy guy; you didn’t blame him, though. This was exciting for him. His smile widened as he got more eager by the second.
“No. I still hate him.” You said firmly. You were not admitted the fact that you maybe, slightly like Jake. Not happening.
“Ugh, c’mon, y/n. You know he can be nice, you’ve seen it yourself. He’s even been nice to you now. Without any prompting.” He pleaded as he sat on the edge of the table opposite you.
You leaned back against the sofa and sighed. You looked at Josh’s face and you could see he was desperate for this to finally be over. “Okay, fine. I don’t like Jake. However, I’m not as inclined to gauge his eyes out when I look at him anymore. Happy?” You reasoned.
He shook his head and smiled. “Fine. This is a starting point, then.”
“Sure. You can call it that if you’d like.” You giggled. It was clear he was a little frustrated, all he wanted was his best friend and brother to get along, but it was fun to wind him up sometimes.
As the night went on, people slowly startled to filter out the party, only leaving a few people. You were thinking about jake, and how he helped you. You wanted to repay him, so you took yourself to the kitchen and began clearing up some of the used cups. You figured he would appreciate this, since no one likes cleaning up the morning after whilst morbidly hungover.
You were nearly done when Jake walked in. He paused in the doorway, “What are you doing?” He asked, not moving.
“Oh, hi. I’m just cleaning up a little bit. Thought it might help you out tomorrow when you’re hungover.” You stated, smiling at him and continuing to throw away all the trash laying around.
“You don’t have to do that.” He began to walk over and attempted to take the bag from your hands. You pulled your hands away.
“You didn’t have to help me earlier.” You looked up at him and sent him a reassuring smile. You really wanted to help out.
“How are you doing after earlier?” He asked, ignoring your previous statement.
“Yeah, I’m fine. I’m just glad you helped.” You replied, setting the bag down on the floor when there was no more trash left on the counters.
“How are you getting home?” He wondered, picking up the trash bag and moving it to the doorway so he could take it out later.
“Oh, I was just going to get a taxi.” You said as you fiddled with your rings, again feeling awkward with this new tone of conversation between you.
He shook his head, “No, you can stay here.”
“Why do you care how I get home?” You retort. It came out slightly harsher than you expected, and he took a step back.
“Why do i care?” He repeated. “Look, we might not see eye to eye, but what happened to you tonight wasn’t okay. He might not have done anything, but who knows what might’ve happened if i didn’t show up at the right time. I know you know that, and I also know that you’re going to have overwhelming anxiety about getting into a taxi, by yourself, at night. I’m not willing to let you do that whilst you’re also drunk and vulnerable. What kind of person would that make me if I didn’t care?” He said, raising his voice. He began to walk away from you, making his way out of the kitchen.
You rushed over to him, grabbing his hand to pull him back into the kitchen, “Wait, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean for it to come out like that, I guess I’m just used to keeping my guard up around you.” You apologised, looking up at him. You realised you were still holding his hand, so you hesitatingly let go. You’d never really been this close to him, and you weren’t complaining. You studied his features, moving your eyes around his face.
“I know, me too. I’m sorry for shouting, it’s just annoying because I was being nice, and you sort of threw it back in my face.” He said as he did the same to you; studying your features.
You wondered what it would be like to kiss him, or what his calloused hands would feel like against your bare skin, or how he would feel insid- stop. You still hate him. You thought.
He wondered the same about you. He wondered how soft your lips would feel; how you would taste. He was willing to find out. In a moment of boldness, he began to move closer to your lips. He was getting closer, closer, clo-
“Hey guys- wait a minute. Did I just interrupt something?” Josh said as he walked into the kitchen, a smirk beginning to spread on his lips.
You both moved away from each other, not wanting to let on that you were making up with each other; or whatever you were doing. You weren’t really sure what just happened.
“No.” You both spoke at the same time.
“I was just clearing up, and then Jake came in. That’s all. What were you going to say?” You stuttered. You fiddled with your rings again, looking down at your hands.
“Oh. Well, I’m going to bed. I’m staying here tonight by the way, Jake.” He turned around and made his way out of the kitchen and upstairs to the spare room.
You giggled at Josh as you turned round to face jake again. “So, am I staying here, too?” You asked. You felt bad asking, but he was pretty clear on his opinions about you getting a taxi.
“Yeah, if that’s what you want.” He responded. He reached his hand to the back of his neck, playing with his hair. He obviously felt nervous. Or awkward. Probably awkward, you assumed.
“Yeah, thanks. Can I take a shower?” You asked. You felt gross, you always did after drinking. You noticed his eyes move over you, sparking a warm feeling in your belly. You tried to push the feeling away, not prepared or ready to feel this way about him on such short notice.
“Yeah. The bathroom is upstairs, opposite the top of the stairs. The towels are in the cupboard next to it.” He replied whilst pointing upstairs. Neither of you moved, you just started at each other. You were both equally as confused at what happened before Josh interrupted. Was it a moment? Was it not a moment? Who knows.
After a few seconds of painfully awkward silence and staring, you left to go upstairs and take a shower. You found the towels in the cupboard that Jake mentioned, and turned the shower on. You adjusted the temperature so that it was a little warmer, and peeled off your dress. It felt good to get it off of you; you never found tight dresses as the most comfortable option.
You tied your hair up in a bun after seeing the stingy amount of options for shampoo. You also didn’t fancy sleeping in wet hair. You stepped in and immediately relaxed at the feeling of the water hitting your back, making every effort to not get your hair wet. You took your time washing yourself, not wanting to leave the warmth of the shower. Your mind wondered to Jake. You’d always thought he was attractive, but you were never attracted to him. Probably because he was never nice to you. But after tonight, after seeing the caring side you’d only ever observed, you felt differently about him. It was hard to dislike him as much when you had been on the receiving end of his selflessness and kindness. You wondered what this meant for your relationship with him. Were you still enemies? Or were you walking into new territory with him? You weren’t sure.
Eventually, you decided to get out and began drying yourself. You wrapped the towel around you and tried to find Jake to ask where you would be sleeping, and if he had any clothes for you to wear. Both questions which should’ve been asked before you got in the shower, you realised. You found him in his bedroom, sitting on the edge of his bed in just his trousers. You’d never seen him shirtless, and you’d never say no to seeing it again; that’s for sure.
You knocked gently on the door despite it being open, to let him know of your presence. He looked up and raked his eyes down your figure. You felt exposed.
“Hey. I was just wondering if you had anything for me to wear, and where I was sleeping?” You asked, speaking gently to not wake Josh up.
“Uh, yeah. You can sleep in here, if that’s okay with you. I’ll find you some clothes to wear, just give me a second.” He said, getting up from his bed and making his way to the chest of drawers to find some clothes for you.
“But where will you sleep?” You asked, feeling confused as you watched him dig through his clothes.
“On the couch downstairs. Here, you can wear this top. You can wear these pyjama bottoms if you want, but they’re a little big on me, so they’ll probably be big on you, too.” He muttered as he handed the pile of clothes to you. Your hands brushed together, the small amount of contact bringing back the warm feeling in your stomach. Stop. You thought.
“No, I’ll take the couch. I can sleep anywhere, it’s okay.” You responded, moving your hand to the top of your towel to stop it from slipping.
“Honestly, just take the bed. Take it as my formal apology for the last however many years of shit.” He smirked, attempting to make a joke out of the ‘however many years’ of torture.
“Oh, we’re apologising now?” You countered, returning his smirk.
“I think it’s about time, don’t you? Anyway, it’s your turn now. I just made my apology.” He said as he moved closer to you, leaning on the doorframe.
“Not to erase all of our progress, but that was not a very good apology.” You argued. God, he looked good without a shirt. You thought.
“I think it was a great apology. I’m offering you to sleep in a nice, warm, comfortable bed.” He retorted, gesturing to the bed behind him.
You shook your head and laughed. “It didn’t even include the word “sorry”, Jake.”
“Okay, fine. I’m sorry, y/n. Better?” He said, still sporting the same smirk.
You wanted to kiss him. You’d been trying to ignore this fleeting thought since you were in the kitchen together, but it was becoming insufferable. You squeezed your legs together at the sheer thought of him touching you.
“Better.” You responded, “I’m sorry, too. Truly.” You said, setting the tone to something more serious than before. You had less of an issue apologising to him now that he had initiated it, but you were so ready for this battle to be over between you.
He stared at you, not really knowing where to go from here. He also really wanted to kiss you; he thought you looked good in only a towel, and imagined how easy it would be to remove it. He imagined how you’d look underneath it, having to stop himself from finding out. He could see the swell of your breasts under the towel and felt himself starting to get hard. He saw your eyes flick down to his lips and linger there, before moving back up to his eyes. Does she want this, too? He thought. He took this as a signal that you felt the same and leaned in, capturing your lips in a gentle, yet passionate kiss.
You were in shock. You had been wanting this, but you did not realise he wanted it, too. You leaned into the kiss, feeding your hands into his hair. You tugged it at the roots slightly, earning a little groan from Jake in response. This felt so wrong; but it made sense. You wondered if all of your friends were right; maybe it was just built up sexual tension.
His hands moved round your waist, squeezing at your skin. His tongue swiped against your bottom lip begging for entrance, which you granted. You moaned into his mouth at the feeling and grabbed his arms, pulling him impossibly closer to you. You needed him, and he needed you just as much. You felt his hard-on press against your lower stomach. You could feel yourself getting wet at the thought of him inside of you, and reached your hand down and palmed him through his trousers. He sucked in a breath and pulled away, “Stop. Are you sure you want this?” He asked with concern and desperation written all over his face, pushing you away from him slightly.
“Yes, Jake.” You whined. You didn’t mean for it to come out like that; you were aiming for a steadier, firmer tone, but you found it hard to care, It’s not like you weren’t getting a little impatient.
He leaned back in, kissing you with more passion than before. He moved his hands to the top of the towel, silently asking you to take it off. You obliged, taking your hands away from his neck and unravelled it, letting it slide down your body.
He moved his eyes over your body, groaning at the site of you. “Fuck, you look so pretty.” He muttered, pulling you back into him and kissing you again.
You moved your hands to his belt a second time, undoing the buckle and chucking it on the floor. You undid the buttons and he slid them off, stepping out of them and kicking them out of the way. You saw his growing bulge through his boxers; you wouldn’t be lying if you said your mouth started watering at the sight. You wanted to taste him.
So you did just that. You got down on your knees, using his thighs as an anchor to ensure you didn’t keel over; that would be embarrassing. He looked down at you, his jaw slack and his hair draped around his face. He took his hand and gently cupped your cheek, slowly guiding your head forward. “You want a taste, baby?” He whispered, stroking your cheek with his thumb. You nodded your head yes whilst you took your hands to the tops of his boxers, he stopped you. Again.
“Words.” He demanded, tightening his grip on your jaw.
“Yes, I wanna taste you.” You muttered, still gripping his boxers.
He nodded, giving you permission to carry on. You slid his boxers down, revealing his hard cock. There was pre cum dripping out of the head, and you swear you almost started dribbling at the sight.
You leaned forward, his hand still pressed against your face, and licked up the side. He took in a sharp breath and closed his eyes, moving his hand so that he could grip your hair.
You took the head into your mouth, sucking gently. You wanted to tease him. You moved down slowly, hollowing your cheeks ever so slightly. “Ah, fuck. Don’t tease.” He uttered. His breathing was starting to get irregular as you continued down his length.
He was getting impatient. He needed to be inside of you, and you were taking too long. He moved his hand to the back of your head, edging you forward and testing the waters. You hummed around his cock, giving him approval.
He moved your head forward, forcing you to take almost all of him into your mouth. He was huge; to say the least. You hollowed your cheeks as much as you could as he created a rhythm for you. You moved your hand from his thigh to the base of his cock, jerking him off slowly as you took the rest of him in your mouth.
He hit the back of your throat and you gagged around him. His hand faltered as he threw his head back, “Jesus, y/n.” He growled, pulling your hair harshly. You could start to feel him pulsing in your mouth, and you knew he was getting close. He was panting, at this point. His hair was sticking to his face and his jaw was slack. He looked hot, and the need you’ve been feeling for him has just increased by an obscene amount.
Almost as if he could sense your increasing desire, he pulled you off of him. “I nearly couldn’t stop myself.” He admitted sheepishly whilst he helped you off of your knees, bringing you in for another kiss. He could taste himself on your tongue; he could’ve come if he carried on, the images of you on your knees flooding his head.
“Get on the bed.” He uttered, unbuttoning his shirt and throwing it onto the floor. You obliged, swaying your hips as you walked over to the bed.
He joined you on the bed and pushed your legs further apart, “Now it’s my turn to taste you. You want me to taste how sweet you are, honey?” He whispered as he placed soft kisses around your dripping cunt.
You moaned at the sheer thought of his mouth on you, “Yes, please.” You whined, moving your legs further apart as a way to prompt him.
He liked a stripe down you, causing your hips to buck into his mouth at the sudden sensation. You grabbed his hair in your hands, tugging slightly. “Eager, are we? I’ve barely even touched you.” He taunted, smirking to himself at the thought of getting you so worked up.
Your cheeks turned a crimson colour from embarrassment. “Please, do something. I need you.” You pleaded. It was getting too much now; you just needed something, badly.
“Be patient.” He muttered into you, pressing his mouth against you again. He circled your clit with his tongue, and with no warning, pushed his fingers into you; setting a relentless pace. The noise you made was inhuman, and as a reminder of the sleeping beauty next door, Jake smacked his hand on your thigh. Your hand flew to your mouth in an attempt to hide the noises coming from you.
The rate at which he was pumping his calloused fingers was sending you to the edge at an embarrassing pace; he could feel you squeezing his fingers, “You gonna come for me, pretty girl?” He asked, somehow pumping his fingers even faster than before.
He sucked on your clit, and you couldn’t take it anymore. You were trying to speak, but you were sure your words were incoherent. Your orgasm was imminent; you were bucking your hips, desperate to come. His fingers hit a particular spot within you, and a wave of pleasure crashed into you full force. You were chanting his name like a mantra, though you were sure it made no sense. He took his fingers out of you and began lapping you up, striving to collect every little bit of your orgasm on his tongue. “So sweet.” He groaned.
You tried to push his head away; but he was stronger than you and carried on. “Can you give me another one? I know you can, sweet girl.” He prompted, pushing his fingers back inside of you and, yet again, setting a relentless pace.
“I need you, Jake.” You begged, still trying to pry his head away from yourself. You threw your head back into the pillows as the slight pain of overstimulated faded, being replaced with pleasure. “God, Jake.” You moaned.
“You gonna come around my fingers again, hm?” He taunted, placing his mouth back on your clit straight away.
“Fuck! Yes, yes, yes.” You whimpered, feeling your second orgasm approach quicker by the second.
“See? I knew you could do it for me.” He remarked, “C’mon, sweet girl. You can do it. Just one more and then you can have my cock, yeah?”
His words of encouragement egged you on, and you pulled at his hair in an attempt to bring him even closer. He groaned into you; the vibrations sending you over the edge. You threw your head back, squeezing your eyes shut. You were beginning to wonder why you hadn’t listened to your friends because you did not want to wait any longer for him, and you were already half way there.
He pulled his head away, and slowed down the pace of his fingers, slowly working you through your high. He climbed on top of you, and the cold metal of his necklaces touching your chest sent a chill down your body.
You leaned in, starting a heated kiss with him. You couldn’t get enough of him; eager to feel him inside of you. He moved down to your chest, taking your nipple into his mouth and sucking harshly. You arched your back into him, “Please, Jake. Please, I need you so badly.” You cried, wrapping your legs around his waist.
You moved your hand down to his cock and stroked him softly, “you want my cock, baby?” He uttered, trying to conceal the groan he let out from such a delicate touch.
“I can’t take it any longer, I need you, Jake.” You demanded, quickening your pace on his hard cock. He could’ve come right there and then; the combination of your touch and your shameless begging making it hard to control himself. It was painful, and he wondered how he didn’t just fuck you up against the wall the second you removed the towel.
He removed your hand, replacing them with his own, giving himself a few languid strokes before guiding it to your entrance. “You sure about this?” He asked, his tone switching from demanding to concerned.
“Jake, if you don’t fuck me right now, I might go insane.” You stated, looking up at him with pure desperation. You genuinely thought you were going to combust with how impatient you were getting.
He needed no further confirmation, and thrusted into you. You yelped at the feeling of him; the burning sensation from his cock stretching you out catching you off guard.
“Shit, y/n. You feel so good. So ready for me.” He panted, setting an unforgiving pace. His thrusts were deep, and reached all the right places.
You wrapped your arm around his back and dug your nails into him, needing something to grip onto. He groaned at the feeling, gripping the sheets beneath him. You could feel yourself getting closer already, and so could he, “Are you close? I can feel you- fuck, I can feel you squeezing me.” He groaned into your neck, “I wont last much longer if you keep doing that.” He moaned as he started to suck on your neck, leaving reminders of tonight for tomorrow.
You tried to respond, but the immense pleasure you were feeling caused your mind to go blank. You were trying to hold your orgasm off; not wanting this to end, but to no avail, your third orgasm came crashing down. You dragged your hands down jakes back, most definitely leaving scratches for him to discover tomorrow. He fucked you through your high; not faltering once, whilst whispering sweet words of encouragement into your ear, “you’re doing so good for me, baby.”
You came down from your high, feeling utterly fucked out. “Can you do one more for me? I know you can- fuck, just one more, please?” He said, his steady facade slipping in an instant.
“Jake, I can’t. It hurts.” You pleaded. On one hand, you never wanted this to end. But on the other hand, you were exhausted and the overstimulation hurt.
He moved his hand down to your clit, circling his fingers around it quickly. “You said that last time, and you did. Stop being pathetic.” He growled, leaning his head into your chest to start sucking on your nipple.
Pain turned into pleasure; as usual, and your fourth orgasm was fast approaching. “You can do it, please do it.” He begged, his hips faltering as he tried to hold off his orgasm. “I need to feel you come around my cock.” He pleaded, quickening his fingers which were circling your sensitive clit.
He toyed with your clit faster, silently pleading with you to hurry up.
It worked.
Although not as intense as the last three, you were still sure you were sent to some other dimension as your fourth orgasm hit you. You could feel jakes hips faltering as he fucked you through your orgasm, whilst also keenly chasing his own.
“Fuck! I’m gonna come, y/n. Where do you want it?” He asked, his face screwed up and seconds away from coming.
“Inside! Please, I wanna feel you fill me up.” You urged as he tucked his head into the crook of your neck.
His hips stopped, and he let out a guttural moan that you wish you could play on repeat. You pulled his head away from your neck, trying to see his face as his come filled you up. His hair was stuck to his face with sweat, and his cheeks were a crimson red.
He collapsed on top of you, his heavy breaths heating you up even more. You brushed his hair out of his face and tucked it behind his ears, wanting to see his fucked out face.
He rolled off of you and got up to the bathroom, leaving you on your own to reflect on what just happened. When he came back, he had a wash cloth and kneeled beside you to clean you up. “You okay?” He questioned gently, stroking the outside of your thigh.
“Yeah. Just tired, is all.” You replied, smiling at him. He thought you looked cute; sprawled out on his bed looking all fucked out and tired.
He discarded the cloth and came to lay next to you, pulling you into his chest. You wrapped your leg around his waist, and absentmindedly started to draw patterns on his bare chest.
“Thank you. For helping me earlier.” You mentioned quietly. You felt bad. Now that you had seen, first hand, just how caring he is, you felt bad for the way you had previously treated him.
“Look, y/n,” he sighed, “I’m not a bad person. I know we haven’t gotten along for some time now, but it doesn’t feel good to think that you assumed I’d ever leave someone to fend for themselves in that type of situation; or any type of bad situation. I personally think I just adequately apologised by making you come four times, but I think you’d disagree. So, I’m sorry, y/n. I’m sorry for the way I’ve treated you, and for all of the comments I’ve made towards you. I’ll be honest, I’ve seen the way you are towards others; the real you, and I’ve always wondered what it would be like to be on the receiving end of that. Now I know that you’re a great person, and always have been.” He confessed, stroking your hair softly. You were overwhelmed, to say the least. You never expected to make up with Jake so fast; let alone going from hating him, to having sex with him, all in one night.
“I’m sorry, too. I know, and knew, you weren’t a bad person. If we’re sharing secrets now, I’ve wanted to make it up to you for a while, but I was too stubborn. I would agree that you adequately apologised, but hearing you say the words made it a lot better. The best apology I’ve ever received, if you will.” You giggled softly, admiring his face. He always thought you were attractive, but seeing you in this knew light made it different for him. He wasn’t just attracted to the way you looked anymore, but you as a person, too.
You wondered what this meant for both of you. You knew you at least liked each other now, but you wanted to know him. The small taste of the real Jake you had gotten tonight was simply not enough.
“What does this mean for us? Are we friends now?” He queried, a frown appearing on his face.
“I’m not sure. Why don’t you take me out to dinner and we can find out?” You countered, your heart rate increasing at your sudden boldness. He stopped stroking your hair and looked at you with a grin.
“Deal.” He agreed, leaning down to press a gentle kiss on your lips. You pulled away, nuzzling your head into his chest with a giddy smile plastered on your face.
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AITA for "unknowingly" cheating on my girlfriend?
🤍🍇 so i recognize post
preface: yes i am, theres no excuse, i just want to hear more ppl's thought because different ppl in my life have very different opinions on this??? even though i think cheating is cut and dry?
earlier this year, i (20nb, tho i was 19 at the time) was in a purely monogamous relationship with my ex (19f). there were ups and downs, i had some issues that i really shouldve talked to her about, but overall it was the best experience. id never dated anybody before. she's the only person who ive ever loved in that way. i think shes the best person, funny, smart. i was really lucky to have her.
i have another friend, who i'll call H (21f), who has been my friend for years. we're really close, and we've shared a lot with each other. i also love her deeply, though in a different, entirely platonic way. she has told me that she loves me, and has loved me in romantic ways, even though i've never reciprocated (im fine with that, everyone in my main friend group is a little bit polyamorous).
there were two main incidents that happened between me and H. the first, i didnt really understand what was going on or that it was entirely wrong. we were cuddling, which i do with all of my friends, and she started getting really into it and getting on top of me. she asked if she could kiss me (on the lips) and i said no, partly because, well, i had a monogamous partner, and partly because i hate kissing on the lips. i probably shouldve entirely cut it off at that moment. my only excuse (which is pretty flimsy) is that, im kinda aroace so physical affection and the difference between platonic and romantic have always left me a little confused. i kinda thought this was normal, especially because H is polyamorous and in several relationships that heavily blur the lines between platonic and romantic.
then, about two weeks after that, H and i hung out again, but this time we were smoking marijuana. weed makes me highly suggestible and also incapable of remembering anything past about five seconds. not that im blaming the drugs, just describing the situation. basically, H and i were cuddling again when she decided to move on top of me and got flirty, with a lot of touching sensitive places for the purpose of getting a reaction (all above the belt). i went along with this because i respect H, ive known her for a long time, and i didnt want to say no to her. again, not an excuse, because she didnt force me to do it.
in the moment, i didnt think this was cheating. we werent doing anything explicitly sexual, we weren't making out, but we were definitely frisky and i know H was horny at the time. a couple hours later, when i sobered up, i suddenly realized what we had done and asked H if i had just cheated on my girlfriend. she also seemed to realize what had just happened and we agreed that i had cheated, that it was entirely wrong, and we should never do it again.
i decided to tell my ex about this immediately, because i thought she should know. i asked if she was in a position to hear bad news, and when she was, i was completely honest. she obviously didnt take it well, mentioning how she felt like she could never trust me again despite being the person she trusted most in the world. she loved me but this was unacceptable and a huge violation. i agreed, and after a bit of thinking, i told her that i thought we should break up. i had terrible guilt about what i'd done and assumed that we'd never recover, and it didnt seem like she could pull the plug, so i did.
she proceeded to get even more mad at me because of this, which in hindsight is completely understandable. from her perspective, i had just dropped two emotional bombs on her, and maybe i was implying that i liked H more than her. i wasnt, and i dont, but i know why it came across that way.
my other friends agreed with me that i shouldve broken up with her after that. in hindsight, i dont know if it was the right choice. i miss her dearly and wish i had worked more on the relationship.
we've since talked about it. i told her that i still loved her (bc i do, very deeply, and i dont know if i'll ever get over her) but said that i dont expect anything, dont expect a relationship, etc. she was okay with this because, in her words, she trusts me to not make it a big deal or awkward. we hang out frequently now, we watch anime together, and we get along well as friends. i feel so lucky that she is willing to spend time with me, that she still enjoys my company even a little bit.
the confusing part is that i told my dad about this and he basically said, "you were 19yo in a long distance, online-only relationship. this was inevitable and you shouldnt feel too bad about it. it was wrong but not the worst thing ever." i dont really agree with that, because it was a pretty serious relationship despite being online. we even met up at a convention and spent several nights together in a hotel. it was the happiest weekend of my life. i thought i could marry her maybe someday. and i dont think being 19yo justifies it. 13yo maybe, but i was old enough to know right from wrong, even if my knowledge about romantic and sexual relationships was underdeveloped.
basically, im looking for nuanced opinions. i fully expect the results to be YTA. im hoping ppl can give me any sort of insight in the comments.
PS: H is partially to blame bc she knew i was in a monogamous relationship but please dont hate on her too much in the comments, we've had a lot of talks about this and what happened drastically changed the way the both of us see relationships and each other. basically, she learned her lesson and she was never trying to be a bitch or a homewrecker. i know her well enough to know shes a good person at heart. she's also not on tumblr to see any of your comments. direct all of you criticism towards me, please.
What are these acronyms?
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sturniololoco · 7 months
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Could u do a Colby Brock x sturnilio triplets sister? Like shes a part of the triplets channel and goes with them to Collab with Sam and Colby
Are you Scared?
Colby Brock x Sturniolo Little Sister (SLS)
Warnings: Kissing, ghosts, random shit, etc.
Note: Kinda set from the collab but some event r out of order, might do a part two, let me know
SLS's POV
Today was the day I've been looking forward to for months:
My triplet brothers and I are going to film with Sam and Colby!
I've been "stalking" their account since we got the invite, and I must admit, their channel is pretty cool, not to mention Colby, who just so happens to be very good-looking.
I got ready, wearing a pair of black cargo pants with a cropped baby tee for the occasion. I put my hair into an elegant slicked-back bun, making sure everything was perfect.
"Hurry up SLS/N! I gotta pee!" Yelled Chris's sleepy voice from outside of our hotel bathroom.
rolling my eyes, I unlocked the bathroom door and walked out, lightly punching his arm in the process.
"Okay, cutie! I see you!" Nick said as I walked out of the bathroom and sat next to him on the bed as he put his shoes on.
I smiled at him, grabbing my airforces to slide on as we waited for Matt and Chris to get ready.
-
"Alright! Who's ready to get gohstified?"Nick asked once were driving to the haunted hotel.
I laughed at his choice of words while Chris and Matt cheered from the front seat.
Leaning over, I snapped a quick selfie with Nick, mentally reminding myself to post it to my Instagram when the collab was posted.
As we pulled up to the hotel, I could tell that people thought it was haunted. The place just screamed old, scary, and ghost-filled.
I felt nervous butterflies erupt in my stomach as we walked through the threshold of the hotel's front door.
"Hey, guys!" I heard a voice say.
I could tell it was Sam's since we've watched about 30+ hours of their channel in the past week.
We smiled as we walked over to them, my brothers dabbing him up as I gave him a polite side hug. He told us to follow him so we could go find Colby.
But when he said his name, I got butterflies again, but I don't think they were scary ones.
Weird.
-
"What's up, you guys!" Colby said as we met him in the main lobby sitting area.
And I was right, he was very good-looking, even more so in person.
My brothers performed the same actions as they did with Sam, dabbing him up casually, and talking with them about how excited they were.
But I felt my face get hot as I wrapped my arm around Colby's midsection for a side hug. And the height difference was so extreme that he had to lean down to wrap his long, muscular arm around my shoulders.
as I walked back to stand next to Nick, I looked back at him to see him looking at me, with a slight smile on his lips.
My face was officially as red as a tomato.
-
Colby's POV
I knew the triplets had a little sister, but I had no idea that they had a little sister who was hot as fuck and had a great sense of style.
She was so perfect in every way, from her slicked-back hair to the shoelaces on her airforces.
She gave me a side hug in greeting and I had to lean down to wrap my arm around her perfect shoulders.
I was kind of upset as she let go to stand with her brothers, but she looked at me on her way there, her cheeks perfectly pink with a small smile playing on her lips.
She might not of been able to see it from the outside, but on the inside I was smiling like an idiot.
-
We started with a tour from the nice lady who worked at the front desk. She did a very good job interacting with the camera, as well as flirting with Chris.
That left me enough time to stand behind the camera, which just so happened to be where SLS/N was standing.
From "stalking" the triplet's YouTube channel, I could tell she was a little camera shy, hence why she didn't appear in a whole bunch of their videos.
But all the same, she came. She's now walking behind Sam who had the camera on the tour guide and her brothers.
Halfway through, she stopped to look at a painting, letting the others walk a little ahead of her. I stopped too, and decided to take my chances.
"You like this one?" I asked her, hands behind my back while I stood next to her, admiring her as she admired the picture.
She turned her head, looking a little startled as her cheeks started to turn pink.
Fucking adorable.
"oh-I, uh... guess it just caught my eye." She said, adding a cute little giggle to the end of her excuse.
I couldn't help but smile at her, just her presence alone was enough to make my chest flutter.
we began walking side by side as we caught up with the others.
"Are you having fun so far?" I asked her, trying to make the silence less awkward.
"Oh my gosh, yes! when I heard I got so excited!" She said, turning her body slightly to look at me.
I smiled at her again, happy that she was happy to be here.
-
SLS/N's POV
I was honestly so happy that Colby stopped to talk with me. He must have noticed that I shied away from the YouTube videos and came to talk with me.
We caught up with the others as the tour guide left, right beside a picture of a little girl with faded, green skin.
sam explained that we were all going to put candy on the frame as Colby got out a bag of candy from their backpack.
Everyone grabbed one as he held the bag open, then set them on the frame.
I was last, reaching to grab a strawberry-looking candy from the bag As I pulled my hand out, I brushed his, earning another red face from me.
I looked up at him with nervous eyes, but he looked down at me, giving me a smile while whispering,
"You're okay. Go put your candy up there."
I instantly obeyed, following his orders as he put his candy next to mine.
"oh my gosh! This is a great picture for the photo dump SLS/N! Get together with Colby real quick!" Nick said, whipping out his phone.
Colby and I looked at each other stunned for a moment before wrapping our arms around each other in a side hug, leaning into each other to pose for the camera.
I could feel the muscles in his torso and back as we smiled, making my heart flutter and my face turn pink,
again.
-
Colby's POV
I felt bad putting my hand on SLS/N's bare torso for the picture, but her arm around my back caused the baby tee she was wearing to slide up, exposing a little bit of her perfect frame.
Her cheeks turned pink once again as we pulled apart, smiling at each other.
Once we were done, Sam began explaining the elevator game.
-
Once Matt and Sam began their journey up, Nick, Chris, SLS/N, and I were supposed to start our own challenge, but then SLS/N spoke.
"Is there a bathroom in this place?" She said, looking around slightly.
"yea, there's one down the hall, I'll show you if you want," I said, mentally cursing myself, knowing we had a job to do.
She gave me a small smile as she followed me down the hall and back to the main sitting area of the lobby.
"it's right in there, just walk to the right," I said, pointing to the women's side of the bathroom.
"By myself?!" She asked, fiddling with her fingers slightly.
"I laughed under my breath.
"Well, seeing as I'm a guy, I can't really go with you, now can I?" I said to her, feeling the goofy smile spread across my face.
"I uh don't really have to pee anymore actually, you can go through." She said leaning against the wall, trying to look casual.
It didn't work. She looked completely terrified of going into the bathroom alone. She was still picking at her nails and her face had gone bright red.
But now I decided to use this to my advantage.
-
SLS/N's POV
Colby walked over to me and rested his forearm on the wall above my head. I could smell his musky, warm scent as he leaned in closer.
"Are you scared?" He whispered, his hot breath fanning over my face.
A smirk was playing over his perfect lips, knowing exactly what I wanted him to do next.
I nervously shook my head yes at his question, not knowing what else to do as my face burned hotter than the sun.
At this point, he was smiling lustfully at me, only leaning in closer.
"Don't worry, I'll protect you." He said in his husky voice, finally leaning in and closing the gaps between our mouths.
The kiss was soft and sweet. Warm and protecting. Our mouths moved in sink with each other and his hands grabbed my sides, no longer hesitant to touch my bear skin.
He pulled away, leaning his forehead on mine. Just as it looked like he was about to say something, he quickly pulled away and sped down the hallway.
I stood there, shocked, but then regained my surroundings and chased after him.
Just as I was about to say something, we rounded the corner to see my brothers, Sam and Matt back from their trip, and the camera pointed at us.
the red light on,
recording.
Lemme know if you want a part two!!!???
@idkwhosnyla @babypat08 @eyelessdemon00 @christopherowensturniolo @sturnsxx @freshloveforthefit @matty443355 @sleepysturnss @emeraldgreenbeautiesstu @sunsetsturniolos @hoesturniolo @x4nd3rsukz @chr1sgirl4life @sstvrnioloo @sturns-posts @chrisstopherfilmed @kylasrealityx @zoeysturnioloooooo @comet235 @islaasblog @sturnioloblogs @defnotayonna @mattsleftnipple03 @thematthewlover @mattsaq @idkhowtosleep
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hollowed-theory-hall · 2 months
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yeah i definitely think the animagus form is supposed to symbolize what you are inside. sirius is a powerful and dangerous dog - for loyalty and protection. im really curious to hear more about your thoughts about him actually turning into a Grim specifically because I LOVE that.
Thank you, yeah, anon is referring to this post. I just always kinda thought everyone was right to mistake him for a grim, and really, his description in dog form just makes it seem very likely actually:
But Harry continued to stare at the front cover of the book; it showed a black dog large as a bear, with gleaming eyes. It looked oddly familiar. . . .
(PoA, 54)
Harry outright says the grim on the cover of Unfoging the Future looks like Sirius' Animagus form.
Harry saw something that distracted him completely — the silhouette of an enormous shaggy black dog, clearly imprinted against the sky, motionless in the topmost, empty row of seats.
(PoA, 178)
Sirius when he comes to watch Harry's quidditch match, again he isn't described like any regular stray dog. and all the descriptions of Sirius I looked from PoA I looked up have him described as incredibly large and off looking for a dog:
And just then, it emerged — a gigantic, shaggy black dog, moving stealthily across the lawn, Crookshanks trotting at its side.
(PoA, 304)
Something was bounding toward them, quiet as a shadow — an enormous, pale-eyed, jet-black dog. Harry reached for his wand, but too late — the dog had made an enormous leap and the front paws hit him on the chest; he keeled over backward in a whirl of hair; he felt its hot breath, saw inch-long teeth —
(PoA, 334)
“Lumos,” Harry muttered, and a light appeared at the end of his wand, almost dazzling him. He held it high over his head, and the pebble-dashed walls of number two suddenly sparkled; the garage door gleamed, and between them Harry saw, quite distinctly, the hulking outline of something very big, with wide, gleaming eyes. [...] “There was a big black thing,” said Harry, pointing uncertainly into the gap. “Like a dog . . . but massive . . .”
(PoA, 33-34)
Harry tells Stan, "Like a dog but massive" Why would he say that about a regular-sized, semi-normal dog?
That being said, there are some very large dog breeds out there that Harry probably isn't the most aware of that Sirius could be. But, Sirius being a grim just makes sense to me, idk.
Like, he grew up in Grimmauld Place so it connects him to his family in a way another dog breed wouldn't. Sirius is a Black and proud enough to have a rare magical creature as an Animagus form. I also think it's kind of amusing for all that he likes to disregard his family and their ways, he still has a magical Animagus form ("Always pure" whether he wants it or not). The grim connects him with death and therefore with some of what a stag represents as I mentioned here. This connection with death connects him to the Potters in general (the Peverells) and with James, Lily, and Harry, which I like a lot since the main target of his dog-like loyalty are the Potters. James at first and later on, Harry.
And the Grim is an omen of death, when you see it, death follows soon after. And if the stag symbolizes death and a passage to the afterlife, it sorta marks Sirius and James as inseparable, just like they are described as being, "never saw one without the other".
Also, Sirius is a character that has always accepted death. I believe the original plan with the Secret Keeper was for everyone to think Sirius was the Secret Keeper while Pettigrew was the real one. He was the decoy and ready to die at such a young age for the safety of the Potters. And when we meet him later in life he is just as willing to face death. Then add the fact that he died by literally falling into the vail of death, how he was the last Black by name, and all his family died, like, idk, I feel like Sirius has some connection to death (not like Harry, more like a shadow of death following him) and I like the idea of him being the grim, being that shadow that after you see it, death will follow as a symbol of his personal tragedy as well.
(Hope my yapping makes sense...)
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wonton4rang · 4 months
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I'm not the only one ¡!
pairing: bnd x reader.
warnings: mentions of smut, cheating, arguments, yelling, cursing, and i think that's it.
summary: mini scenarios on how would bnd react if you cheated on them. (probably gonna do one if they cheat on you)
note: if you find any typos or anything, lmk!! i had this on drafts for a while and i just gave it a quick look so i could post it tonight 🫶
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sungho;
i believe it would happen due to routine? you guys would be together for years before it happens but it does. you were in your office, kissing your co-worker in top of your desk when he knocked on the door twice before entering. you guys quickly stopped kissing and the boy excused himself and went out, passing by sungho's side and closing the door behind him.
"babe, what are you d-doing here?" you asked, your voice inevitably trembling at the look your boyfriend was giving you, your eyes lowering to the flowers in his hands after you heard the plastic sound when he clenched his fists. "you brought me flowers? you didn't have to-"
"are you going to act like i didn't see what happened?" he cut you off, his eyes watering up and his gaze being a mix of sadness and anger. "like you were not kissing someone's else tongue?"
"baby, it's not what you think, i-"
"stop fucking babying me, y/n, what the hell is this?" he finally snapped, his feet moving to be closer to you. "why are you doing this to me?"
"it's nothing, baby, trust me. i love you so much, he's no one" and yet he just pressed his lips together with disappointment. "don't give me that look"
"i caught you cheating and you are not even trying to apologize, you're asking me to trust you... trust you in what? i saw it, okay? there's nothing to trust you on"
"don't say that"
but sungho was not in the mood to discuss with you right now, he had a rough week at work and managed to make time for today because it was a special day so he wanted to surprise you. well, he was the one who got the surprise.
you were never this type of person, you would've never thought about cheating on him but you felt so lonely and that boy that worked with you was so caring that you just gave in.
sungho looked to the ground for a few seconds, lifting his face to show you his sore eyes and the tears accumulated in them, extending his arm to you before saying:
"happy anniversary, y/n" and he gave you the flowers before leaving your office.
next thing you knew when you got home was that his things were not there and he just left you a note behind explaining that he couldn't forgive a cheater, that it wouldn't let him sleep at night if he knew you did that. so he apologized for leaving you like this, disappearing for good after all those years.
maybe you should've thought about it before kissing your work partner. maybe you should've talked to your boyfriend and explain how you felt. but no, you didn't, and those were the consequences.
riwoo;
you guys met at the dance studio, you took hip hop classes together and even got to make a presentation as a couple, that was the start of y'alls relationship. you got along really well and complemented each other so good that you decided to take it to the next level and date.
but riwoo was an insecure person, and don't get me wrong, it's not that he didn't trust you at all and that was the main reason, it's just that he felt you were soooo good for him and he always was kinda scared that he might not live up to your expectations. that's why when you told him that you were going to have a couple dance with another boy he went nuts.
there wasn't anything he could possibly do asides from following you to the studio and watch you practice with the other male, his lips pouting each time you laughed or your bodies collapsed together. it was late, that dance was yo close and riwoo didn't understand why all of the sudden you two were kissing.
his mouth gapped and his hands covered it when he let out a shocked gasp. he didn't wanna see anything else so he just went home in silence, waiting for you but trying to cover up the fact.
"you're home" he softly smiled when you got in the room, you just nodded. "how did practice go?"
"it was fine, i'm just tired" liar. "how are you? did you wait for me?"
riwoo noticed how your faced looked normal, like you just didn't cheat on him, like you were not lying at his face and mocking his sweet demeanor. it was a hopeless cause, he didn't even know if this was the first time you did this. and you know what? he didn't want to know either so he just ignored what he saw and stayed with you.
his heart would randomly start racing whenever you go out without him but he calms down when he thinks that at the end of the day is him who you come back to.
jaehyun;
he wouldn't shut up about it. it would be with a member of his football team, you went to see your boyfie but got caught up behind the yards with some tall and hot dude who called you pretty more than once, even in front of myungjae.
in fact, this boy would've been a theme of conversation between you two by now, he would explain you how much he loved you to go and see him, how happy he felt when you cheered for him from the public, but that he couldn't help but feel uneasy when this guy looked at you with crazy eyes; like he would eat you up if he ever had the chance.
so when jaehyun doesn't see you on the crowd after practice is over he goes looking for you, checking on the dressing room and the hallways before going out to the field again and finally listening to your sweet laugh. he thought that maybe you were playing with him, hiding so he could find you, it wouldn't be the first time, so when he smiled and walked to the place he heard your laugh coming from his heart would literally shatter to pieces.
his eyes would water up so quickly that he didn't even notice when you two looked back at him when he was already giving a soft denial swing with his head and running away.
what hurt him the most wasn't even the fact that you cheated, it was the fact that you told him to not worry about that guy, that you told him and reassured him a million times nothing like that would ever happen. and yet here he was, laying down on his bed, cuddling his own sheets and balling his eyes out because he didn't even know how he would trust anybody from now on.
taesan;
he couldn't believe his eyes. his foot frozen and his eyebrows frowning in confusion before his presence alerted you and the boy between your legs. you were making out with some dude on the bed you BOTH shared. the deception on his face was almost audible before you pushed the boy on top of you off and he almost ran out, passing by taesan's side and gulping when the taller man gave him a dead stare.
"i can explain"
"i would like you to" he would say but you just know he's raging right now, and why wouldn't he be? "if you even have anything to say"
"i didn't meant to, i promise, this was just a mistake and i will never do it again" he nods while looking at the floir and you take it as a good sign to continue "i only love you, i don't know what i would do if i loose you"
"and yet you did this" you could finally hear the pain in his voice, your heart shattering when he looked up and his eyes were full of tears.
and you knew you fucked up bad when he finally cried, taesan DIDN'T cry, ever. you guys have been dating for 2 years now and you've never seem him cry before. he just had that cold image that always made you feel like he didn't care.
well... he did.
"i can't believe you did this, y/n. i trusted you, i love you, i gave all of me!" he was so overwhelmed. "was i not enough?"
"no, no, you are, i just-" but when you tried to touch his face and remove his tears he pulled back from your touch.
"then why?"
but you couldn't answer. there was no answer. nothing you could say to excuse this. you didn't even know why it happened in the first place, maybe you were bored and decided to see what happened if you kissed another boy.
"i think we should break up" taesan said. "i don't feel comfortable being around you"
"but i-"
"please go, you're just making it worse" he would finally say with some hate on his words, spitting them out and sobbing before removing his tears from his face. "don't contact me, hope you have a good life. i loved you"
but not all loves were meant to be forever, not even his unconditional one.
leehan;
he is not stupid, he might be a little slow for somethings but not this. he really loved you, so much that he could accept your almost unexistent love for fishes and his tank because you were his baby, you were the love of his life so he didn't really mind.
so when you started going to the store so often to get him "tank stuff" or a new fish because he "deserves it" he knew something was off. he just didn't expect to find you making out with the owner of the store in the back of the place, hearing your laugh, your voice and even sweet moans coming from your mouth.
he felt like something broke, like he lost something he didn't even knew it was there, his body felt empty, his stomach hurting and his face just expressionless. now that he was here, he decided to wait for you, see what you had to say, so he sat down on the chair of the register and just waited with his arms closed, his back facing the door you were inside.
"i have to go now, my boyfriend, he... you know him" you mumbled and he payed attention. "he can't know we do this, okay? it's not personal"
"but you come almost everyday, i thought that we-"
"there's no we, you and i just fuck" and that's when the colour left leehan's face, his eyes looking for you when the door was opened and the look on your face was priceless.
"it took you quite long, y/n"
"baby-"
"why?"
"w-why what?" he just stared at you, the man on your back just looking away when leehan's eyes shifted to him, he couldn't believe you actually were asking.
"we need to talk"
"whatever you wanna talk about, you can say it here" his right eyebrow lifted before he finally got up and said:
"fine, i will give you until the end of the month to leave my apartment"
"baby, but i-"
"maybe he can help you with that, or do you guys really just fuck?"
but the way he said just made you realise how mad he actually was. his ears were burning up and his arms kept flexing due to him containing his anger.
he left, and he didn't even talk to you ever again until you left and he mumbled a soft "have a good life" before shutting his door on your face. you should've known better than to fuck with kim leehan tbh.
woonhak;
the way he would literally crumble is the highlight for me, you would cheat on him during a school trip. he would be so excited the week before because it was his first time going to one and having a girlfriend so it was double excitement!!
he would make you two lunch and dinner, kimbap with cute little details, bringing matching coats and gloves and also a warm and thick sheet so you could both hug and watch the moonlight together for a while before going back to the dorms.
for him, it was perfect, it was the stars aligning, but for you? it was bad timing that woonhak went to look you up when you were kissing his best friend, your eyes only opening when you heard the gasp and the plate dropping to the floor.
you pushed the boy in your arms and looked at woonhak with panic in your eyes, how fucking dumb could you be to cause that look in his face? he looked traumatised, like he just found a body or something.
"woonagi, i- i am so sorry, this- i didn't... please, come to m-"
but you couldn't even finish talking when he ran away. you didn't see him for the rest of the trip, not even his shadow, and you looked everywhere!!! he would close himself, going back home and locking himself up on his room while he cried over how stupid he felt, he didn't even know what was the awful feeling he got, he knew it was because of your betrayal but why did it hurt him so bad?
his first love broke his heart for the first time and poor baby just couldn't get over it, sobbing loudly and just cuddling that huge teddy bear he once thought on giving you.
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vvampir3s · 11 months
Text
☆ One Last Kiss.
✮ pairing:
Stalker!König x fem!Reader
✮ warnings:
stalking, mentions of cnc, brief mention of murder, PLEASE tell me if i missed any 😭.
✮ word count:
1.1k words (sorry for the shortness 🙏).
✮ a/n:
couldn’t stop listening to this song, had to write this! absolutely adore the result, and the first time im posting a drabble/fic?? 🙏.
this is just the first verse!
uhh thats basically it, this was kinda self indulgent but wtv 🤷‍♀️. stalker and slasher könig fics got a chokehold on me atp 🤭.
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“Heavy humid night, corner of Park and Main,”
You were sitting on the cold wooden bench, late at night. Dumped by your boyfriend a mere 15 minutes ago, just as you were about to go on a dinner date. Dressed in a short black slip on dress, your favourite navy blue heels, your hair straightened with bouncy curled ends.
Hugging your knees to your chest tight, you silently cried, unbeknownst to the man stalking walking along the park trail towards you. As you sobbed in a ball, you felt and heard the bench creak under someone’s weight, not yours, of course. Someone just sat down next to you, earning a jolt of surprise and gasp from your end.
— “Heard you were crying, ma’am.”
Said the Austrian man with a gruff voice, placing a handkerchief in your small palm. His touch lingered for a brief moment, before pulling away almost sheepishly. Despite his hardened appearance at the moment, his eyes softened upon seeing your teary bloodshot eyes.
He fucking hated seeing you cry. His little taube, no one and nothing deserved her mere breath. He would slaughter the scum who even think to upset her, let alone make her cry. Or maybe, he had already done it.
— “Thank you..?”
You sniffled, feeling yourself burn with shame for crying in a public setting. Alone. At night, in the pouring rain for gods sake. With an obsessive piece of shit following you.
“Cast that first glance, your smile, my veins,”
He thought his heart would burst. Just as you wiped your tears away, cleaned your nose free of snot, you looked to him with a soft, appreciative, painfully angelic smile. He should’ve known what he was getting into. His veins boiling, his heart pounding, his mind racing with a multitude of thoughts, mostly perversions.
— “No problem, mein liebling.”
He said with a small nod, leaning back against the bench. It was silent between the two of you, only the noise of the rain pouring down to fill the void. But you enjoyed it nonetheless, putting your knees back down, crossing a leg over the other, with your hands resting in your lap.
You couldn’t help but look him over, noticing large, muscular beefy build. One of a Greek god at that, really. His black combat boots, large grey hoodie, and black cargo pants. Unfortunately, his face concealed by a sniper hood. He had his sleeves rolled up slightly, his large, somewhat veiny, calloused hands in view for you to ogle at.
“At maximum capacity, blood pumpin' so fast,”
He knew you were staring. God, just the feeling of your eyes on him had him overdosing on pleasure. On one hand, he wanted to take you home, shower you with love and affection, wife you up, have a little family back in Austria, practically domestic you all for himself.
On the other hand… he was fighting back the sickening urge to just take you here and there, lap at you like a starved man, make you gag on his monster of a fucking dick, fill you to the brim with his seed, paint your walls—
All the while you thought you were being sneaky about it, he simply acted oblivious. Believably enough, too.
Snapping out of your trance like state, you were about to call for a taxi to drive you home. Meanwhile, he put his left arm over the top of the back bench, practically wrapping his arm around your shoulders. He rested his arm there, slouching back and spreading his legs out comfortably.
— “What happened, schatz? I’m all yours.”
— “Pardon me, sir?”
Did he just say that? Fuck, it slipped from his tongue. Whatever, act natural. His little liebe is too innocent to see past his ill intentions.
— “I’m all ears.”
Must’ve been your imagination, or the rain messing with your ears. He seemed like a nice man, right?
“My girl, if looks gave heart attacks,”
— “You’ll make fun of me, sir.”
— “I would never, mein kleiner liebling. No need to adress me as sir. Just König.”
You poured out your heart to him. Your shitty boyfriend who just dumped you, left you here to rot after planning a whole date with you, giving you a half-assed apology of “I’m so sorry, I don’t have feelings anymore,” when really, he just got bored of you.
Tears pricking the corners of your eyes, your bottom lip quivering, your eyebrows creasing throughout the whole explanation.
Just one more word about your shitty ex would send you reeling back into a hot mess of sobbing and crying. You couldn’t help it, as the pathetic, naive, and desperate little girl you always have been.
König listened. He nodded along, adding a few words of “I’m sorry about that,” and “You deserve so much more than him, hase.” You knew he was speaking another language, but not sure what he was saying. It sounded sweet and comforting, so you appreciated it nonetheless.
His fucking blood was boiling. Not like before, when he was overheating with lust, love, and pleasure for you. No, now he was fucking pissed.
How your ex used you with his pathetic little 10cm dick, never gave you attention, barely ever looked your way? Slept with other useless dirty whores, all the while you adored him with all you had?
Fuck, he’d treat you so right. He’d fuck you just right as well. The thought of you with him got him hard, whether that be willing or not, friends or foes. He hated himself for the lack of control, but you were an irresistible little thing.
But paired along with that anger, was fear. You loved another man so easily, who was to say another couldn’t just sweep you off your feet? He couldn’t imagine you with another man, hand in hand, kissing, hugging, fucking. It drove him mad. Fucking mad with obsession and possession.
That’s it, he decided. Whoever was to lay a hand on you, speak a word of romantic affection for you, or even think of you romantically, will fucking face his wrath. He was a literal colonel, a fucking beast.
— “I’m so sorry that happened to you, liebste. Say, how about I take you out, a harmless little dinner? To make up for your shitty boyfriend.”
You couldn’t believe it. He was really about to take you out, after hearing your sob story of a ex?
— “I… would love that, really. Thank you so much, König.”
He walked alongside you, listening to you rabble on. He couldn’t get enough of you.
Hearing you say his name was enough, for now. But soon enough, you’ll be mewling his name over and over as he’d pound into you relentlessly, hot tears streaming down your face.
All he had to do now was take you on a little date, take you back to his place, and fuck you dumb.
Ah, after he cleaned up your ex boyfriend’s dead body in the basement of his house. Forgot about that part.
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hihello-pinky · 2 years
Text
Sight (2)
Suna Rintarou x F! Reader
Sometimes, it takes losing someone to finally see them. He wished he knew this before, but Rintarou had to learn this the hard way. 
WARNINGS: mentions of abortion, mentions of miscarriage (NO SMUT IN THIS PART!)
Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction. This is no way represents my views of the original anime/manga characters.
WC: 3.3k Genre: Angst, Romance, Hurt/Comfort Other Tags: Forced Marriage, Developing Relationship, Denial of Feelings, Emotionally Repressed, References to Illness, Angst with a Happy Ending, + more to be added.
I know I mentioned I’m working on having a longer part 2 but I kinda like where this ended. Thank you all for waiting and for the love and support!!!
part one part two part three part ???
leave me love?
MINORS DO NOT INTERACT!
Looking back to it, everything happened so fast. As soon as your friends forced Suna’s name out of your mouth after they found out you’re pregnant, they pulled all their connections to get the two of you to meet... Only for him to question the fatherhood of your child. That’s when you first met Osamu Miya. You did not know back then that he was Rintarou’s best friend and as devastated as you were, you spilled your problems to him.
That’s how you found yourself next in the most stressful weeks of your life. Mr. and Mrs. Suna telling you that you are to wed their son. Rintarou telling you that you should get an abortion. And several nosy people telling you that you are a whore who got herself pregnant to get into the rich Suna family.
You tried to refuse the marriage, telling the couple (who, unlike their son, were the sweetest people you’ve met) that there’s no need for a marriage, you just need support to raise your child. They of course wouldn’t have it, and you knew it’s partly because they wanted to punish their son. You admittedly entertained the thoughts of getting an abortion but you just couldn’t do it... not after watching your sister struggle with multiple miscarriages in the past. And with the people spreading malicious things about you... you tried to ignore them, until a few days before the marriage where the gossips suddenly stopped.
Marrying Suna Rintarou brought a lot of changes in your life. First of all, you had to forego the post-graduate internship that was offered to you at the end of your senior year. Second, you had to move to a house gifted by his parents, which caused a rift between you and your sisters since you initially promised them that you’d be living with and helping them. And lastly, you had to live with Rintarou, who explicitly lets you know that he blames you for the forced marriage.
Another surge of headache breaks you out of your reverie. You straighten on your seat in the hospital lobby, waiting for the doctor’s secretary to call you. You had dropped off the kids at Sacha’s place right after confirming with the receptionist that there’s an available slot for a check-up. Last night, right after Rin left, you had a terrible headache, much the same as the ones you’ve been having for the past few weeks.
You look at the queuing monitor and notice that there are still a handful of people before your turn. You open your bag to get your Kindle but it grazes the leather bind of your journal. You must have taken it with you when you took your reading device from the bedside drawer. And just as you’re always inclined to do, you flip to the already dog-eared pages and read through your journal entries from years ago. It’s time to relive the memories.
You were in your fourteenth week of pregnancy. The new house’s backyard was as empty as you felt for the last two months of living with your new husband. He would wake up early and arrive home late. Thankfully, you have managed to befriend the housekeepers, Yuto and Jiri. It was one evening, though, that neither of them was home since the former was on leave while the latter was sick.
The clock struck ten and the main door opened, revealing Rintarou who looked visibly unwell. You rushed to him and he tried to swat you away, only for you to feel how his skin was burning. He must have been feeling too sick because after two more attempts, he finally let you help him into his bed.
That night, you nursed him to the best of your abilities, from changing his clothes to wiping his face with cold cloth. You even cooked soup for him, feeding him as his hands were shaking too much. As you were about to leave his room so you could go back to the spare one where you have been staying since you two moved in, his rough voice stopped you. “Stay.”
Your eyes widened, unsure if you heard him right. “Are you...?”
He groaned. “Or call Jiri. I need her.”
“She’s sick,” you replied. “I’ll just stay... if that’s okay with you?”
He was quiet for a while. “Okay.”
That night, you ended up staying with Rintarou, sitting beside his bed and barely getting any sleep. It went on for two more days. When you woke up on the fourth morning, you were surprised to find a blanket on top of you, much less feel the softness of a mattress below you.
You jolted awake and was surprised to see Rintarou sitting up with his back leaning against the bedframe and talking to someone on the phone. “Thanks, Kita. Yes, I’m feeling better. I’ll be back in the office tomorrow.” He must have noticed you staring at him for he turned his head towards you, the look on his face unreadable. “Call me when something urgent comes up. I have to go.” After dropping the call, he moved to stand up.
“Are you okay?” You asked before you could stop yourself.
“Weren’t you eavesdropping?” He shot back. “I’m feeling better. Jiri’s coming in today by the way, no need to make your pathetic attempts of forcing yourself into my business.” Suna didn’t even spare you a glance before he marched off to his bathroom.
Despite the two months of living with him, his actions towards you still managed to hurt. You gulped and moved to stand up from the bed, knowing too well that Suna would want nothing but to see his room void of you once he comes back.
Two days later, you found yourself with a flu. You begged Jiri not to tell Suna or his parents. But alas, you should have known better that while she had become your friend, her loyalty was still with the Suna family.
On the third night of your flu, you heard a knock on your door. It was odd since it was way past Jiri’s and Yuto’s hours of duty. Sighing, you forced yourself from your bed, wrapping the fluffy blanket around your body.
I must be delirious, was your first thought as you saw Suna at the other side of the door.
“Did something happen?” You asked, trying to hold back a cough, hoping he wouldn’t notice.
He looked every bit uncomfortable as he handed you a paper bag. “Here.”
You reluctantly received it and peeked inside. Care package. You looked up at him questioningly. “What’s this for?”
He broke the eye contact and mumbled something.
“Sorry? What did you say?”
He let out an annoyed sigh and forced himself to look at you eye to eye. “Jiri told me you were sick and that you probably got it from me. She scolded me that I shouldn’t have asked you to stay in the same room because it’s risky for pregnant people.” His eyebrows furrowed. “What are you smiling about?”
“Nothing,” you replied but you knew your smile was still on your face. “You didn’t have to go out of the way to give me this, you know.”
“Then what the fuck was I supposed to do? Jiri would have never let me hear the end of it.”
“Hmm... could have just said ‘sorry’, maybe?”
Suna rolled his eyes and opened his hand, palm up. “Forget it, then. Give that back.”
You clutched the care package against your chest. “No way! No taking back, this is mine already!” Before you knew it, a giggle escaped your lips. You immediately froze, realizing it was Suna you were talking to. However, when you dared to look at him, there’s a barely noticeable hint of a smile on his lips, the atmosphere between the two of you warm. “Good night, Y/N.”
It’s only when the sound of his footsteps have receded that you realized what happened: he just called you by your first name.
“Mrs. Y/N Suna?” The secretary’s voice brings you back to the present. “Please enter room 125.”
You gather your things and make your way into your doctor’s office. She greets you with a warm smile. “How are you doing, Y/N?” The doctor asks as soon as you’ve settled down on your seat. “You haven’t visited in a while.” Megumi Hirai is a nice lady who’s in her early forties and you’ve taken a liking to her in the past few years. “I take it you’ve been busy?”
You nod. “It was the kids’ birthday party yesterday. There was a lot of preparation that needed to be done.”
“Oh, that’s nice. How old are they now?”
“Five,” you smile proudly. “I feel like they’re growing up too fast. I want them to stay little for just a little bit longer.”
At that, Dr. Hirai laughs. “Every parent experience that. I see no reason for you to worry though, you’re still young. Isn’t it about time that you and Rintarou try for another child?”
The smile on your lips drops a little. “We’re too busy for that this time, I think.”
Sensing that you want to change the subject, Dr. Hirai moves on to another topic. “How’s work going?”
“Great,” you reply. “A bit stressful, but it’s all good.” Despite the Suna family saying there’s no need for you to work, you still got yourself a job at a local publishing company. You’ve been loyal to it, and now you’re one of the head editors.
You’ve always been passionate about writing and editing; you could say you were depressed when you had to let go of the internship at the global publishing company because of the sudden pregnancy. The memories of you sharing that to Rin and him reluctantly helping you find a job poke at your head.
You will yourself to stay at the present. “I’m still happy with my job.”
“That’s nice to hear.” Dr. Hirai smiles. “What’s your concern, then?”
“I’ve been having these extreme headaches for the past few weeks. Sometimes they last long, sometimes they pass quickly. The other night, I think I passed out.”
The doctor hums. “Any other symptoms?”
“Um, I can’t think of any…”
“Have you noticed any trend on the times when they surge?”
You shake your head no. “Not really. I honestly don’t think it’s serious but they’ve been becoming more frequent lately.”
“Okay.” Dr. Hirai says, pulling out some papers. “I’ll be requesting for you to undergo some tests. Have them done as soon as possible so you can schedule another checkup with me.”
“Thank you, doctor.” You take the request forms.
“You’re welcome,” Dr. Hirai smiles kindly. “And Mrs. Suna?”
“Yes?“
“Don’t downplay the headaches you’re experiencing. You never know if they’re actually underlying symptoms of something serious. Have a nice day.”
 --------
“I’m sorry to be saying this, but you don’t look too well.” Osamu Miya is placing the take-out rice balls you had just bought in the paper bags as he alternately looks between his task at hand and you, who’s sitting at the counter.
You had decided to drop by his restaurant before picking up the kids from Sacha. His statement makes you bite your lip. “Is it that obvious?”
“That you look like you had no sleep and cried your eyes out for hours?” Osamu asks in reply, then takes a deep breath. “Yes.” The gray-haired man shakes his head. “Rin is so fucking stupid. I’m sorry.”
“You don’t have to apologize on behalf of him, Osamu,” you say. “He’s your best friend but his actions are all his own choices.”
The twin keeps quiet for a while as he finishes packing your order. In the meantime, you rub your fingers against your temple, symptoms of a headache beginning to manifest again. You close your eyes, hoping it goes away. Once you open them, you see Osamu staring intently at you. “I have a confession to make,” he says.
This piques your interest and you lean a little bit forward. “What is it?”
“It’s all my fault,” Osamu says, gulping. “After that first night we met, I went to Rin’s parents and told them what happened. He initially confided in me that he got someone pregnant and I wasn’t planning on getting involved until I met you. You were nice and kind, I couldn’t let Rintarou to just fuck up your life.
“I thought once he gets married, once he gets to know you... he’d grow and change. But I was wrong.” His eyes are now filled with guilt and apology. “I’m sorry, Y/N. If I had known that Rin wouldn’t change one bit during the past five years – ”
“Stop,” you cut him off, no longer wanting to hear more. “That’s all in the past now.” You contemplate your next words carefully. “Besides, it’s not like Rin was completely horrible to me during the time we’ve been together.”
Osamu’s voice is filled with curiosity. “What do you mean?”
It’s at that exact moment that the door of the restaurant swings opens and someone enters, your heart dropping once you see who it is.
Suna Rintarou. Your husband.
 -------
 Suna hasn’t seen you since the night before and he definitely wasn’t expecting to see you here at Osamu’s restaurant. Once you face him, he immediately notices the redness of your eyes that your makeup wasn’t able to cover. He chooses not to think about the reason behind them.
“Hey, Rin,” his friend waves at him from behind the counter. “Y/N is here.”
He rolls his eyes as he stalks toward the counter. “I’m not blind, ‘Samu.” He takes the stool next to yours and immediately notices you tense. He inwardly sighs, remembering what happened last night. He turns to face you and gets a little surprised when he sees you gathering your purse and the paper bag from the counter.
“I have to go. Bye, Osamu! Thank you for these!” And in a moment, you’re out the door.
As soon as you’re gone, he feels his best friend’s curious eyes on him. “What? Gonna ask me to go run after her?”
Osamu rolls his eyes. “As if you would.”
While his friend is right, the statement still annoys Suna. “Why was she here, anyway?”
“As if you care.”
He tries to mask his annoyance as he clenches his jaw. “You’re, right. I don’t.”
There’s a beat of silence before Osamu speaks again. “Why are you here, Rin?”
Truth be told, Suna’s agenda was to force Osamu to join him on a night of drinking where he may or may not tell him about what happened last night. But seeing you here... and then Osamu’s rather irritating replies... “Forget it, I’m leaving.”
“Did you and Y/N fight?” His friend’s question makes him stiffen.
Suna rolls his eyes. “We often argue. You know that.”
“Yeah,” Osamu replies rather curtly. “But this time, it seems as if you’ve crossed the line.”
To his own surprise, Suna replies with, “Yeah, I think so.”
He doesn’t need to look at his friend’s face to see the surprise on it. “Wow, that’s a lot... coming from you. What happened? Please don’t tell me you hit her.”
He glares at the man. “I’m an asshole but I would never lay a hand on a woman, even if I hate her.”
“Why do you hate her, Rin?” Osamu asks. “What has she ever done to you? You still have your job and inheritance; you can still fuck around... I know she doesn’t demand much from you about the kids. In fact, she got the short end of the stick. Why do you hate Y/N?”
Instead of answering his friend’s questions, Rin adjusts his position on the stool and makes a fist against the counter. “She confessed to me last night.”
“And what did you say?” Osamu’s voice begins to become unreadable.
“Nothing.”
“Nothing?”
Suna shrugs. “We were having an argument so I figured she was just trying to fuck with my head.”
There’s a short silence that follows but it’s long enough to make him feel uncomfortable.
“Are you really that blind?” Suna prefers it if his best friend is shouting at him at the moment. But alas, Osamu sounds so calm and everyone knows that Osamu Miya is ten times scarier when he’s acting calm during moments that would call for him to be mad.
“What do you want to hear as my answer?” Does Osamu want him to admit that all these years, he thought your hurt towards his treatment was solely because you wanted to have a happy little family? That he didn’t think you actually fell for him in those few months that you were in good terms? But, admitting those would mean he needs to tell Osamu about that time, those five months where he opened his heart to you. Those five months that he never dared tell anyone.
“Jesus Fucking Christ, Suna!” Osamu slams a hand against the counter, anger and frustration evident in his voice. “Anyone with an eye can see that Y/N is in love with you! Though it remains a mystery to me how she managed to fall for a dickhead like you, it’s clear that she loves you!”
Other explicit things leave Osamu’s mouth and Suna just stays there and takes them all. Once his friend is only heaving deep breaths, he begins to talk. His turn. “You asked why I hate her. Well, my answer is short.” He mentally sighs and, finally deciding it’s due time for Osamu to know, says the name that haunts him to this day.
Osamu’s eyes widen. “You mean...?”
“Yeah.”
He watches as a conflicted look dawns on his friend’s face. “Do you understand me now?”
“Kind of.” His friend’s gaze hardens a bit. “But you do know you’re being unfair to Y/N, right?”
Suna stands from the seat, retrieving the cigarette box from his pocket. “I know.” As he walks the short distance from Osamu’s restaurant to his car, all Suna can think about is, And I think maybe it’s about time I should apologize to her.
  ------
You’re inside the bedroom, just finishing up changing the sheets. Ever since Jiri left three years ago and you and Rintarou never hired someone new, you’ve been in charge of keeping the house tidy. In reality, you just had changed the sheets a week prior but what happened four nights ago just makes you want to change them, hoping that as they come clean, so does your relationship with Rintarou.
It’s been three days since the fight and oddly enough, Rintarou comes home on time and even doesn’t complain about sharing the bed. He barely acts as if you exist, cementing your belief that confessing to him was a totally wrong move. However, there are times when you feel him staring at you, as if he wants to tell you something...
You shake your head, reminding yourself that there are lots of things to do. First of all, the test results that you got yesterday after having the necessary check-ups from the day before. Second, the papers you have requested after a long call that you had last night.
You’re too engrossed in your thoughts that you fail to notice that Rin has entered your room. He’s wearing his work clothes which always make him look ten times more attractive. You straighten on the bed and try to look at his eyes. To your surprise, he meets your gaze. “We need to talk.” You both say at the same time.
You bite your lower lip, and seeing as he’s not saying anything, you take it as a cue that he’s allowing you to speak first. So, with a deep breath, you say the words you’ve been practicing in the shower this morning. “I want to file for divorce.”
TO BE CONTINUED.
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arceespinkgun · 4 months
Text
The Sci-Fi Racism of MTMTE/LL
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As I've reread MTMTE/LL I've been struck by the offensive content and messaging, particularly the constant ableism and racism. The ableism I've seen discussed (though I really do think it needs to be mentioned more because wow it is relentless and does not get better throughout the story), but the racist themes don't seem to be mentioned quite as often. I think this is for a lot of reasons, and one is probably that the cast being robots is sort of obscuring connections to real-world marginalized peoples.
But one of the most meaningful purposes for the sci-fi genre in general is to explore these issues through symbolism and allegory, placing real-world people in speculative scenarios, theorizing about the future etc. And I think when you look at what MTMTE/LL is saying about race with its themes it's a lot of extremely negative stuff—I doubt the messaging is intentional, but in my opinion that kinda makes it even more important to talk about it....
The Cold-Constructed
I'm going to begin this post by giving context for people who don't know anything about this story. In these series, it often comes up that there's more than one way for a transformer to be created. The main ways are forging, when the planet itself imbues the malleable metal of a protoform with a spark, and cold-construction, when an existing spark is split, put inside a photonic crystal, and put into a body that's pre-built. There's a lot of bigotry surrounding these origins for transformers, which is a clear parallel to real-world racism. I mean, you can see the word "apartheid" being used to describe the treatment of the cold-constructed, and the use of a slur for that group ("knockoffs") in the panel at the beginning of this post.
It's a commonly held belief that being forged is just better and being cold-constructed is just worse, that someone who's cold-constructed is just more likely to be morally bad, less able to do precise work, and more disposable than the forged. For example, at the beginning of MTMTE, Ratchet is worried about his hands locking up because he doesn't think they can be replaced by building new ones, that only forged hands are good enough for a great doctor.
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There's a lot of internalized ableism that can be read into this too but this post is already so long I'm going to just focus on racism
The big end-of-the-season villain of MTMTE is Tyrest, the former Autobot Chief Justice turned neutral, who was the one who created the cold-construction process, and who also created a computer he thought could determine anyone's guilt. He used the computer during war crime trials he presided over, and discovered 100% of defendants who were declared guilty had been cold-constructed. Breaking from the guilt he felt, thinking he'd created an immoral, inferior race, he tries to kill all cold-constructed people.
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Thwarting Tyrest's plot to kill the cold-constructed was the final battle of the first season of MTMTE.
The cold-constructed person letting the heroes know about Tyrest's plan in the panel right above this is Getaway. He is also an MTO. MTOs ("made-to-order soldiers") are an even lower class within the lower class that is cold-constructed. MTOs, as you'd expect, were bots built specifically as wartime fodder, sent out into the battlefield with a life expectancy in the range of seconds, often before their bodies and minds were even functional. As the war between Autobots and Decepticons raged on, they were even imbued with less and less cultural knowledge, because in the minds of their creators, what did it matter if they were going to immediately be killed anyway? Brainstorm's an MTO, too—in the panel at the start of this post, he's lying about attending protests in the name of the cold-constructed. He's masquerading as an ally there, but it's revealed soon after that he's also cold-constructed himself.
Let's pause for a moment. Assuming you know nothing about MTMTE/LL, what do you think the story would depict when it comes to this oppressed race? I feel like I would expect that the beliefs of the main characters that these people are inferior and immoral would be challenged! I'd expect the cold-constructed and MTOs especially to be saving the day. I'd expect an exploration into why 100% of bots found guilty in those trials were of this marginalized group—a discussion of a prison pipeline that benefits the privileged, maybe? Signs that the computer used was biased because it was created by someone privileged and programmed with biases? Maybe a discussion of how the oppressed were pushed to commit crimes to survive because of the systems keeping them marginalized?
Do these things happen? Er... well... not really, no. Shockingly, Tyrest's assumptions are never challenged despite his villain status and a lot of time being devoted to thwarting his plot? And the people who defeat him, like Tailgate, Rodimus, and Magnus, were all forged. Tyrest was Magnus's former boss and mentor, and Magnus realizing he needs to be stopped is super important, but Magnus never challenges any of these beliefs about the cold-constructed or anything even though Magnus's entire personality involves being super focused on ethics?
I also think it's notable that when Tyrest activates the killswitch, the only characters from the main cast who are affected are Chromedome, Brainstorm, and Getaway. Chromedome and Brainstorm are Autobots who worked together in a system that forcibly lobotomized thousands of people. (There's a lot I could say about the minor and other characters JRo chose to be affected by the killswitch, like how many of them are evil and how they're all treated by different narratives, but that's beyond the scope of this post.)
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Getaway, while not having done anything immoral yet by this point in the story, goes on to become a central villain. In fact, Getaway is one of the most despised characters in the entire TF franchise because of how depraved and manipulative he becomes. His arc involves a self-righteous crusade to remove Rodimus and Megatron from the Lost Light and show up Rodimus by completing his quest before him. Getaway is a self-admitted groomer and murderer who does things like murdering his second-in-command by ripping him apart, tearing his head off with the spine still attached and getting energon all over the floor. Oh, and brainwashing hundreds of people.
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Pictured: the brain stems of crew members Getaway kills in just one of his many crimes
When Getaway's eventually gruesomely killed, it's all forged people who come to confront him (Rodimus, Cyclonus, and Whirl). I think fans might say that this couldn't be racist messaging because Rodimus comes to think better of killing Getaway and tries to save him, but then Getaway still tries to kill Rodimus and Cyclonus and is killed by Whirl for that... but like, imagine if these characters weren't robots and were instead real people. If the horrible villain was someone from a marginalized group (who had even been tortured for it by a genocidal villain) and all the people who confront him and the person who eventually kill him were people from a privileged group, there would be issues with that. Plus, Rodimus saved Getaway to be "better" than him morally.
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I "loved" how right before Getaway's attempted suicide and then actual death, the narrative makes sure to underline that he's an MTO, which makes it impossible to not think about MTOs during this scene
Plus, Getaway's even something like a class traitor. He wants to be validated by Primus so bad, he teams up with Tyrest, the genocidal guy who had tortured him earlier!!! I thought this was a bizarre series of writing decisions to make regarding a character who was introduced as a victim and part of an oppressed group.
One moment that shocked me occurs when we get the first exploration of what being an MTO means. Basically, there's some convoluted sci-fi crisis happening, and everybody needs to reveal their origins. Some characters, like Getaway and Riptide, talk about being MTOs.
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Nautica, a very consistent moral voice throughout this story (whose points are often ignored by other characters unfortunately but still), is also in the room. She's from Caminus, a colony world, and missed the whole War. A large part of her story arc will involve how she's not used to experiencing war and death. So does she have some big concerns about Cybertron's culture upon hearing this? Nope:
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She would not fucking say that
Instead, her reaction is to immediately look at the guy who started the War, Megatron, and credit him for being responsible for so many lives. What. She's also weirdly not fazed when learning about how the superiors of MTOs eventually just stopped supplying them with cultural knowledge because it was expected they'd immediately die after coming online, and these horrible facts are really not discussed again:
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I also want to point out that Riptide is a good character who's an MTO who in my opinion really doesn't do anything immoral, but he was still aligned with Getaway's mutiny initially and is quite literally diagnosed with stupid, which doesn't do a lot to challenge prevailing assumptions about MTOs in Cybertronian culture.
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Brainstorm's status as an MTO becomes a plot point again during his character arc, in which he invents time travel and tries to go back in time to prevent the War in order to save everyone who died during it. When he sees that it seems like nothing he does is preventing the War, he resorts to trying to kill Megatron, but he's easily talked out of it because he doesn't want to murder anyone.
On paper, it sounds like Brainstorm's goodness might disprove cultural assumptions about people like him. But I do want to point out that when Nautica (who again, is a strong moral voice) feels very betrayed by all the secrets Brainstorm kept from her, Ratchet convinces her to give him a second chance by pointing out that since Brainstorm's an MTO, if he'd prevented the War, he'd have been erased from existence. This is portrayed as a selfless, moral act, and not as a self-destructive cry for help, which I think is a poor choice, but worse, the narrative never even brings up the fact that Brainstorm would've not only erased himself, but all MTOs!
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Okay, if bigoted assumptions about the morality and mentality of MTOs isn't something effectively challenged by the story, well, are the claims that forged people are physically more skilled ever challenged? Not really, no. Genuinely, I don't think that ever comes up. Megatron does perform a spark surgery somehow better than actual trained doctors First Aid and Velocity could do near the story's end, but Megatron's someone who was neither forged nor cold-constructed. He has a forged spark in a pre-built body, which given that bigoted assumptions about the cold-constructed are never really addressed by the narrative, lends itself to jokes like, "The cold-constructed body killed 100 billion people, but the forged spark was super sad about it!"
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Rodimus describes Megatron's origin
EDITED TO ADD: There is also a skilled cold-constructed Decepticon neurosurgeon, Spinister... but the way other characters, even his closest friends, consistently treat him is that he is an idiot in every other respect in a way that feels very ableist. It's similar to the way Riptide is treated and his portrayal falls short of challenging the stereotypes, but even more extreme (personally, nothing Spinister ever did or said actually came across as stupid to me, but I'm fairly certain that his actions are supposed to seem that way).
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Organic Life
Surprisingly given that this is a story about transformers, I actually think some of the most racist messaging in these series has to do with organic beings, not even with the robots! Some of the most shockingly racist moments, at least.
Something that's often discussed in MTMTE/LL is a concept called "technoism," the belief that mechanical beings are superior to organic ones, and that mechanical beings should commit genocide against organic species. This is a belief tied to Decepticons, and Megatron was the first big proponent of this idea. In fact, Megatron is stated to have killed 100 billion (!!!) organics, including driving multiple species to extinction.
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Tarn (evil leader of the Decepticon Justice Division) recounts Megatron's desire to purge all organic life
Now, I feel like people who've read this story might be surprised to see that I feel this concept was handled in ways that promote racist messaging, considering the story repeatedly points out that technoism is bad and that Megatron was wrong. Some portion of Megatron's character development involves instead choosing to save organic life.
Unfortunately, I really felt this was extremely clumsily handled. A major Decepticon character who remains a Decepticon, Fulcrum, is especially disgusted by organic life. In one of the most shocking moments in this entire story, Fulcrum basically tells Tarn, "Life was so much better back when we Decepticons did ethnic cleansing, before mean bullies like you ruined it":
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The shocking thing to me is that this is portrayed as a... noble act, I suppose I could put it? Everything is framed as if Fulcrum is doing something heroic in this moment. Disconcertingly, after this moment, Fulcrum is repeatedly used by the narrative as a sort of moral voice when talking to his fellow Decepticons. Whenever they're doing something unethical, he's almost always the first to speak against it. Yeah, ethnic cleansing guy, pre-any character development, is used as a moral compass.
Now, if his belief that organics are inferior and disgusting and deserve to die was challenged and he grew, that would be one thing. But he still finds them just as gross by the end of the entire story.
Similarly, another Decepticon who gets to team up with the heroes and get a happy ending is Nickel, herself a former member of the Decepticon Justice Division, and a strong believer in technoism. She joined the DJD to get revenge against organics who destroyed the colony she comes from. Even by the end of the story, it's clear that she despises organic life.
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The very strange thing is that Nickel and Fulcrum are never shown to change these philosophies, but then join the fight against functionists who want to cleanse the universe of non-mechanical life... but there's nothing ever shown to indicate that they wouldn't agree with that plan themselves...?
Another moment that displays issues with how this story handles these concepts is a little interlude with the organic-operated Galactic Council:
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On the surface, not much is happening, but this is one of my most hated moments. Why? Because the implication is that organic life, this group of beings that Megatron committed staggering, multiple genocides against, is now preventing his character growth journey. That the narrative's taking time to dedicating a whole scene to showing oh, organics can be bad and extort people too! There's "moral complexity" here!!! I really hope I don't need to explain why that's gross and extremely dangerous to apply as a lesson to any sort of real-world situation.
Other
There are other details in this series that feel racist that wouldn't necessarily fit into the other sections of this post.
I wanted to talk about Ten. Ten is a legislator, a non-transformer robot originally programmed by Tyrest to be a non-sentient law enforcer. However, after Tyrest's defeat, Swerve reprograms Ten to be his... well... slave. I mean it, Swerve makes him a worker at the bar who Swerve doesn't pay. Other people like Ratchet and Ultra Magnus try to convince Swerve he shouldn't treat Ten like this, but that isn't enough to get Swerve to stop.
Worse, Whirl etches graffiti onto Ten's back saying he "failed the Ambus Test," which is a test that measures sapience in-universe.
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Now, eventually Swerve and everybody else does accept that Ten is sapient and Swerve feels bad about what he did to him, but Ten continues to be treated badly in general by people like Rodimus.
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When Ten later dies, no time is spent mourning him. Also, nobody ever removed that damn statement that was etched on his back.
I also wanted to mention Drift. He was originally created by writer Shane McCarthy in the IDW comics before these series, and he's heavily Asian-coded, particularly Japanese-coded. Unfortunately, Drift was considered a real Poochie the Dog of TF for a long time by fans, a real Mary Sue, you could say, and it wasn't until MTMTE/LL when James Roberts began writing him that his reputation changed for the better.
...Unfortunately, included in JRo's new direction for Drift's character is repeated mocking of his spirituality. This does get slightly less extreme over time, but that doesn't erase how for the entire first season especially he's made the butt of jokes for it, and the end of MTMTE/LL even confirms that his beliefs were wrong, essentially. It confirms that the gods he believed in both didn't exist and were heavily morally compromised. Combine this with the fact that Drift is so Asian-coded and I feel that it comes across as racist.
Worse, while Drift already had a backstory, JRo wrote a new one for him that can be read to play into offensive, Orientalist stereotypes. JRo shows that Drift was originally a drug addict who earned money by renting out his body parts, an act that feels like a robot equivalent of prostitution. JRo even made jokes about this on his Twitter account, joking about Drift literally renting out his "thighs" for people.
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None of this surprises me necessarily especially given the long history of English Orientalism, but it still sucks, and fandom's fixation on this aspect of Drift's character also sucks (especially the tendency to make this prostitution allegory literal), especially for someone like me who is part Asian.
Another, pretty bizarre and racist thing in Lost Light specifically that I don't really know how to categorize involves a minor villain from that series. When Nautica wants to bring her best friend, Skids, back from the dead, she goes to someone who claims she'll take Nautica's grief in return for using a Cybertronian artifact to bring Skids back to life.
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This villainous character's name is... sigh... Mengel. If you don't know, Mengel is named after real-world Nazi Josef Mengele, infamous for the horrific human experimentation he performed on prisoners in one of the Auschwitz concentration camps. As if this weren't in bad taste already, none of the real-world crimes against humanity have anything to do with the character in this comic I'm talking about—the character Mengel was named this just for shock value and so readers would have the immediate realization that she's an evil scientist.
But this really bad taste isn't even the main thing I wanted to say about her. The main thing I wanted to point out is that she's actually part of a different race of mechanical beings that Cybertronians consider inferior. Even the generally very morally good Nautica (and of course, this is a belief that is not challenged in any way)!
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Plus, this villain has darker "skin" than most of the transformers present in these series, and she has buck teeth with a tooth gap. All of these details combined other her in a racialized way, and I hope it's obvious how disturbing it is to pair these traits with the name of a real-world virulently racist Nazi historical figure.
Conclusion and TL;DR
In this story, it's not enough that a genocidal person like Tyrest is a bad guy or that the genocidal Megatron changes his ways when even the characters often cast as moral voices in most situations like Ratchet, Nautica, and Fulcrum have racist assumptions about the world that the narrative just doesn't really make any attempt to disprove or challenge them on. Or worse, that the narrative sometimes seems to validate with characters like Getaway, (sigh) Mengel, or the Galactic Council. And on a personal note, it's especially frustrating to me as someone who loves characters like Nautica. If she appears a surprising number of times in this post, it's because I'm attentive to her and how the story uses her, because I really like her!!!
Now, obviously, I don't think that stories have to address and defy all bigoted ideas and statements that inform the culture they're set in. But I believe that the people behind these series think the messages of these series are anti-racist and anti-fascist. In fact, one of the issues was even titled "This machine kills fascists," real-world slogan of singer Woodie Guthrie. Plus, I think it might be easy to think that with so much representation of, say, gay and trans people, that this story would have more positive messaging, especially when villains include racists and fascists. But I think MTMTE/LL show a real lack of understanding of the roots of these real-world issues and often reinforce the beliefs that contribute to them. In fact, when I reread these comics, every time some racist idea that's never ever challenged or adequately discussed came up, I tallied it up, then converted the number to dollars and donated the amount to helping displaced Palestinian children. I would love it if I could inspire some fans to donate as well! There’s a wide range of vetted links here.
I'm being so critical of these series not only because I rarely ever see the racism pointed out, but also because it's important to note it so these issues can be avoided in the future. In these comics, I actually think it would have been very easy to avoid these problems that plague the narrative. The bigotry behind Tyrest's philosophy could've been pointed out, maybe even by the people most affected by it. Drift's new backstory didn't have to be one featuring Orientalist tropes. The central villain didn't have to be someone who was a marginalized victim. Characters like Fulcrum didn't have to be portrayed as moral voices while simultaneously in the same breath talking about ethnic cleansing like it's a good thing, and they could have grown and changed in a natural way! etc. None of these things had to be like this.
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