#I want to be a medieval peasant tbh

[sugarcoated0arsenic]

Daily quote:

Yeah, they [medieval peasants] used to do jousting on ice but got some serious injuries because they were too poor to afford safety I guess

(This is the part where you laugh)

[girlymatsu]

is there any more lore surrounding villainess!erina? because i'm obsessed with villainess comics ( and erina tbh ) so i'd love to know more about her in that au. 👀✨️

AHH yes!! Nothing concrete or super fleshed out but I’ve thought of a few things… apologies for ramblings it may not make sense or sounds cringe/cliche/too edgy eep 😭

Villainess Erina is a lady in waiting for a female lead character (either totoko or just a generic y/n character)

She used to not be a noble but a peasant and used to play with Osomatsu when he and his brothers snuck off to play with commoners as kids… so she has memories of being with Osomatsu back in the day

Erina made a deal with cursed magic artifact to replace a noble girl and take her position and links with royalty. The family she ended up being with has plans with infltrating royal families and stealing their magical crests because I like the fun magical medieval world where villainess novels take place in lol, and use Erina to do so.

She is hoping to be in a better life and feel beautiful… have a fantasy happy ever after. She falls in love with Osomatsu through being with the mc princess who is supposed to marry one of the brothers etc it’s like an otome story… Osomatsu doesn’t recognize her ofc, and is amicable to her… but his focus is always on other people and shenanigans and is oblivious to her feelings… Ends up unknowingly being inconsiderate to the her who wants to be closer to him. She goes back to the cursed magic artifact to make things go her way secretly but ends up causing havoc and make her go a little crazier each time. It goes from accidentally cursing people with bad luck and memory loss in her favor, to her anger making her blow up and set a festival on fire.

She even uses corrupt magic to force an arranged marriage to happen between Osomatsu and her… but even then she feels unfufilled and not really loved because she forced it to happen… and feels no one really know her to ever love her.. and when Osomatsu find out how she’s like he will hate her…. Assigned unlovable at birth

Erina had always thought her life would be better living like a princess but is not the one chosen to be loved, she is still longing, and miserable. She thinks no matter how much she tries to slither her way into this world, she is still insignificant with fake beauty and fake jewels.

And yadda yadda she causes a lot of bad ends , one being that she kills Osomatsu and kisses him to see if true loves kiss would bring him back to life (it doesn’t) and as a result kills the rest of the brothers in a crazed state of mistaking them all for him.

And these bad ends timelines keep replaying and start blending together and erina will wake up remembering how much pain she has been in and harm she cause.. feeling no hope for herself </3 and she would call off her arranged marriage and give up completely until Osomatsu is like so thrown off by her change in demeanor and start to chase after her 🥺 like wait don’t u like me why r u leaving .. changed the narrative the story forced her to be in.. and that’s when love story happen.. but it must happen after all that tragedy

Anyways that’s it ok bye

[v-arbellanaris]

in light of this post i wanna talk abt my ocs names!!!! obv some of u were already here for the changes but!!!! the logic behind my da oc names hehehehe

WARDENS

Evadne (/iːˈvædniː/; Ancient Greek: Εὐάδνη): From Greek Εὐάδνη (Euadne), from εὖ (eu) meaning "good" possibly combined with Cretan Greek ἀδνός (adnos) meaning "holy".

Explanation: Felt like an unwell name for a trans Circle mage to choose for herself.

Kalyani (/kæljɑːni/; Sanskrit: कल्याणी): Means "beautiful, lovely, auspicious" in Sanskrit.

Explanation: Default Tabris is Kallian, which seems like a good Fereldan name, but I really wanted to draw on themes around belonging and identity with Kal, and so giving her a name that could be confused for Kallian was something I really wanted to do - to reflect the Anglicisation that often happens to our mothertongue names. Also, desi elves ftw.

Faris (/ˈfaː.ris/; Arabic; فارس): Means "horseman, knight" in Arabic.

Explanation: One of my favourite names.

Aedan (/ˈeɪ.dən/; Old Irish: Áedán): From the Old Irish name Áedán meaning "little fire", a diminutive of Áed.

Explanation: Literally just the default m!Cousland name because I could not be bothered.

CHAMPIONS

Lysander (/laɪˈsændə/): Latinized form of the Greek name Λύσανδρος (Lysandros), and it means "liberator".

Explanation: Pro-mage Hawke. Self explanatory (:

Miranda (/mɪ.ˈɹæn.də/): Derived from Latin mirandus meaning "admirable, wonderful". The name was created by Shakespeare for the heroine in his play The Tempest (1611), in which Miranda and her father Prospero are stranded on an island.

Explanation: I do just like the name but hmmm potentially some thoughts around mage!Hawke and Malcolm dynamics...?

Damon (/ˈdeɪ.mən/; Ancient Greek: Δάμων): Derived from Greek δαμάζω (damazo) meaning "to tame". According to Greek legend, Damon and Pythias were friends who lived on Syracuse in the 4th century BC. When Pythias was sentenced to death, he was allowed to temporarily go free on the condition that Damon take his place in prison. Pythias returned just before Damon was to be executed in his place, and the king was so impressed with their loyalty to one another that he pardoned Pythias.

Explanation: Thinking about Handers so no one talk to me rn.

Amalia (/a.ˈmaː.li̯a/; Greek; Αμαλία): Short form of Germanic names beginning with the element amal. This element means "unceasing, vigorous, brave", or it can refer to the Gothic dynasty of the Amali (derived from the same root).

Explanation: Chose this one because I wanted a warrior!Hawke, who was only ever really a warrior because of necessity. Of all my Hawkes, Mal is actually the one who adapts to being a noble well (Leandra's daughter, through and through), and so I wanted to explore different kinds of strength.

Alexis (/ə.ˈlɛk.sɪs/; Ancient Greek; Ἄλεξις): From the Greek name Ἄλεξις (Alexis) meaning "helper" or "defender", derived from Greek ἀλέξω (alexo) meaning "to defend, to help".

Explanation: Felt like a super fitting name for a red warrior Hawke tbh!!!!

Joan (/ˈd͡ʒoʊn/): Medieval English form of Johanne, an Old French form of Iohanna (Joanna). A famous bearer was Joan of Arc, a patron saint of France (where she is known as Jeanne d'Arc). She was a 15th-century peasant girl who, after claiming she heard messages from God, was given leadership of the French army. She defeated the English in the battle of Orléans but was eventually captured and burned at the stake.

Explanation: Joan is my pro-Templar Sebmancing playthrough. Of course I named her after Joan of Arc.

Maimunah (/maj.ˈmuː.nah/; Arabic: ميمونة): Means "auspicious, blessed, favourable" in Arabic, in the Malay and Indonesian form.

Explanation: Thought about Malcolm naming his tiny mage daughter and wanted to cry. Also, I've always really loved this name - I knew an adult with this name as a kid, and she was really just... I admired her so much. So why not!!!

INQUISITOR

Isra (/ʔis.ˈraːʔ/; Arabic: إسراء): Means "nocturnal journey", derived from Arabic سرى (sara) meaning "to travel at night" - refers to the Prophet's journey from Makkah to Jerusalem (Isra' and Mi'raj)

Explanation: If you know the context behind this name, then the link to the Herald is quite obvious.

Iskandar (/ʔis.ˈkan.dar/; Arabic: إسكندر): Arabic, Malay and Indonesian form of the name Alexander, which is the Latinized form of the Greek name Ἀλέξανδρος (Alexandros), which meant "defending men" from Greek ἀλέξω (alexo) meaning "to defend, help" and ἀνήρ (aner) meaning "man" (genitive ἀνδρός).

Explanation: I've talked a bit abt it before over here!

Mahanon

Explanation: Default m!Lavellan name.

Ellana

Explanation: Default f!Lavellan name.

Marya (/ˈma.rʲjə/)

Explanation: Actually, I wanted to do Arya but. Um. I accidentally. Anyway.

[elpida]

let me compile a list of plots for you that i'm ready to go feral for:

you just won me with the highest bid at an underground prostitution/trafficking ring auction, now what???? gimme that angst, the whole spiel of it.

someone's dad owes someone a shit load of money so one muse is kidnapped by the other, as leverage to make sure they get the money they want but oops now, i kinda of just want you instead. BUT OOP what if the dad just, offers them up instead? and they take the offer.

fancy dress party hook up, in the costume.. but oh no they realise after they should not have hooked up at all. smut and angst.

i swear if someone can give me a ‘i’ll pay you to have my baby’ kind of plot au shit, i’ll scream

stripper plots where the boss has a weak spot are just made for me tbh

i want a woman who’s wanted to have a child for so long and she’s yet to find the right man and she has herself artificially inseminated and then meets a man whilst pregnant and like?? someone stepping up to prove their up to it? loving them anyway yk?

i want friends who are desperate to have children that they decide to have one together it could even be the above but with friends!

i watched sweet tooth and i can't not think about hybrids. let one of my muses by a hybrid with an animal, i beg you. let them be hunted by humans, let one by hunter one by hybrid, let there be angst, like them be their protector, let it be annnnything, let my muse be bought and having hybrids is a sign of wealth, let me just, go unhinged with it.

muses have dated a long time, one finds out the other has a huge secret. honestly are these are NOT good?

if you have a mafia boss, lets talk.

not joking but firemen? where you at?

medieval time change plots, honestly please i love them, royals and peasants and knights and just, the whole lot.

why are there not more supernatural plots? like give me vampires, give me wolves, give me witches, give me a vampire plot where it’s destined lovers? a reincarnated soul mate?

apocalypse au’s. that’s it. that’s the idea.

gimme like the whole, muse being dated as a joke, as a bet, and the reprimand of it, the angst, the genuine feelings that came and the hurt caused ect

[hauntedfalcon]

thinking about how my husband lamented that Rings of Power doesn't do much with the Valar. thinking about how the Queen of Numenor says faith is a thin thread to hang a nation from, which runs counter to... most of recorded human history, not to mention Tolkien's works, where multiple nations of men awaited their True King to deliver them into a golden age, and Boromir's declaration that "Gondor needs no king" signified faithlessness and that was a negative thing. thinking about how there are articles out there to explain why Galadriel was upset in Rings of Power, to explain that she turned her back on elf heaven, on the selfsame far green country with whose description Gandalf moved us all to tears in Return of the King, and she chose ruin and the world

thinking yet again about how Cersei Lannister blows up a whole church because the Sparrows had become more influential than the crown, and a handful of episodes later she says "hey smallfolk, come into the castle keep to stay safe from this battle" and the smallfolk... do it, instead of saying "fuck no, that's the lady with the wildfire who killed our beloved priests and committed the worst possible blasphemies, and this matters to us because we are peasants and the only thing in our lives is work and religion" and there were no further repercussions because apparently the influential state religion of Westeros was one building and a cool catchphrase

thinking about Tess of the Road, which I almost did not finish because wow it's grueling to be a woman in a fantasy novel isn't it? thinking about the spiritual epiphany it grants its title character in the midst of a kneejerk "Catholicism but even more oppressive" setting because it reads easily I guess (see also all the Dragon Age games). still haven't unpacked all my thoughts from that one tbh but it's rolling around in there and it will be for a while

thinking about how almost nobody wants to write characters who have relationships with their gods, even in fantasy, a genre where characters could have very literal relationships with their gods, be they adversarial or positive or realistically messy. thinking about how writers seem not to want to touch that, either because it's too messy or because of an impression that society is beyond that. thinking about how this extends beyond the fantasy genre. thinking about how sterile Station Eleven's post-apocalypse felt and how part of that was a lack of folk practices or any spiritualism apart from the antagonist's obviously bad oppressive pseudo-Christianity. thinking about Anne McCaffrey insisting there is no religion on Pern in the far future, versus, like, everything about Deep Space Nine. thinking about how Battlestar Galactica felt ballsy as fuck for having monotheistic Cylons and polytheistic humans, but in the end that thread and the implications of robots worshiping a god just... never went anywhere

thinking about how, when religion is included in a work of fiction, it’s almost always with a wink wink, nudge nudge, you know and I know how backward and bogus this is, but it’s almost never played straight, much less validated in the narrative (I love you Netflix’s Shadow and Bone). and when it is portrayed as a positive influence in people's lives, it's in the vaguest, always culturally-Christian, terms of "light" and "darkness" and "hope". thinking about how Midnight Mass told a story about people who took so much comfort in their religion that even after it turned them into vampires and destroyed their community they sang hymns as the sun rose, and how that was such a foreign thing that a lot of the audience found it unbelievable

thinking about the extra layer of hypocrisy in defending a work of fantasy by saying "it was just like that back then" when a) there was no back then because it's fantasy, and b) the work in question ignores the foundational role religion played throughout the medieval Europe all these fantasy worlds use as a template

thinking about how art is meant to nurture the soul, but increasingly neglects to grant one to its characters

thinking about how if we can't imagine a world where people have a spiritual life that isn't just a tool of oppression, how can we create one

thinking about how much I love the Queen's Thief series and Arthdal Chronicles

[pussyistheforbiddenfruit]

I’m sorry but I think the small community that’s been created on here of women who go deeper and talk about spirituality, metaphysical topics, the origins of sex and reproduction,the devolution of the species and the truth about hetero dynamics etc should stop engaging with the radfem community on here. It makes me cringe so bad. There are like 25 people who engage is these type of subjects and its been mostly kept discreet until now. The knowledge I’ve learned on here in the past 2 months alone has been invaluable to me and Im extremely grateful for it. The women who appreciate this information are the ones who are ready for it and who actively seek it out or have gone through some type of awakening process that’s led them here. I think it’s foolish to try and debate with or engage with an average radfem. To me this is the equivalent of a secret society releasing their information to the common folk, or opening the doors of the Vatican’s secret archives to the public or even showing a medieval peasant an i phone - I’m serious. The origin of the word occult means to conceal/to hide. This is occult for a reason. It also brings lurkers and trolls and people from larger platforms that could reblog the information shared here for their followers to snide at and condemn and run people off the platform. I love your posts and it’s obviously your decision what you post or reply to this is just some food for thought.

Hey anon! Honestly your one of my fav anons right now, I like this reply.

Yeah I kinda notice it too, those women should stop debating with radfems it's a waste of time, radical feminism is hopeless its an online community, if you know the problem why not try to do some in real life activism? Alot of radfems are also pickmes but for women, they will tolerate mothers, mothers with sons, married women, women with bfs, women who practice feminity, etc even though this goes completely AGAINST their ideology, they're supposed to reject patriarchy and their oppressors (which are males) but will date them or be ok with women dating them?? The definition must have changed when I wasn't looking 😂

I can understand wanting to keep certain information from ppl, people water it down, tear it apart, turn it into an empty husk of what it once was, spread misinformation about it, use only part or some of the information all types of stupid shit, I see this with spirituality. Certain ppl aren't ready it seems, a lot of ppl are also weird..like they are toxic, zombies, or straight-up dead, it's just this energy I get from them, the dead ones scare me tbh, at least the toxic and zombies ones I know are alive even if barely.

But I don't wanna judge ppl I remember when I used to be like that it was like I became a zombie, I was almost deas but then It was like a rebirth happen to me, seeing the information I saw made me alive again and that's why I'm kind of against keeping information from ppl, but only kind of though I know not everyone is like me lol.

But once again I appreciate your anon comment, true intellectual right here 🤌🏽

[boolpropper]

Royal Family: Round 1, Part 3

Prince Peter invites another peasant girl over to the castle. He seems to not want to associate with anyone in his standing.

Emmota and Jasper sneak away to the queen's luxurious bathroom to...um...cuddle.

The Royal Ball for Prince Armin's 18th birthday is underway! The Earl's family, the Brewers, and the Sherrif are all in attendance.

And Prince Peter remains attracted ONLY to peasant girls. To be fair, I don't have any teens in nobility, but it's still funny. I had him flirt with the Sherrif's daughter, who is closer to him in class standing, and he was repulsed by her.

aaaaand Prince Armin immediately goes into aspiration failure upon aging up before I can even change his appearance (ft. sim manipulator ready to go in the background lmao). He's really upset that he didn't go to university. This week on I Am In Deep Despair Over Something I Don't Know Exists!

Now that he's wearing appropriate attire...he is still crying. Okay, okay, I get it. I'll build a university. We'll name it Prince Armin's college. Okay? Want a cookie? [Though tbh i just haven't built the university because I just wanted to get to playing and also sunni's medieval university replacements were weirdly shiny and glowing??? so i just didnt want to deal LMAO]

I'm sorry, am I interrupting something between the Earl and Hodge the Brewer?

And at the end of the round, the Prince's birthday is a royal mess. Amazing.

[drjohndisco]

been thinking about my mer.lin bbc insert, so here's this. the ask game is credited to @/inserthaven !

1. what are the basics of your self insert? name, date of birth, height, etc.?

name: belle 'bug' flora (pendragon in the good ending au i have)

age: 20 (date of birth unknown)

height: 145cm

2. when in canon does your self insert come in? do you have a scene in mind for your entrance?

halfway about season one. they're the person gwen and merlin go to to pick up their flowers.

3. how do the other characters generally feel about your self insert?

they're well liked.

4. would you be considered a main character, side character, villain, or something else?

side character definitley. i wouldn't be in a lot of the arcs, but i'd get mentioned more often than you'd think.

5. does your self insert have any special powers or abilities?

they have (green coloured) magic!!

6. does your self insert have any pets?

no pets. although in the modern au they live with gwaine's cow.

7. would any other characters (besides your f/o) have a crush on your self insert?

i feel like merlin would for a short period of time. something to do with shared experiences and the connections that come with it.

8. what is your self insert’s orientation?

they're queer -- unlabelled because this is the medieval time.

9. who are your self insert’s closest friends?

gwen and merlin!!

10. how do the other characters feel about your self insert and f/o’s relationship?

n/a

11. what kind of outfit(s) does your self insert wear?

put simply. peasant clothing.

12. how would the fandom view your character?

uh. i don't think they'd care much, tbh.

13. does your self insert have any information about their family?

their parents are dead, unfortunately. they died pre-canon (sometime during uthers' magic purge), so that's why my s/i is running the flower shop.

14. what hobbies does your self insert have?

they're into medicinal herbs and floral arrangements!

15. how does your self insert play a role in the plot of the story? do they help directly defeat the villain, support the heroes, etc.?

they help the heroes for the first 2 seasons, and then when things with morgana go sideways they join her side.

16. freebie! name a fact about your self insert you want everyone to know.

n/a

[its-monster-mash]

This has been sitting in my drafts for 1000 years oops Rules: Post the names of all the files in your wip folder regardless of how non-descriptive or ridiculous. Let people send you an ask with the title that most intrigues them, and then post a little snippet of it or tell them something about it.

Thank you so much for tagging me @venus-haze!! I am also excited to participate in the self-callout lol

I don’t actually have a “WIP Folder”, I just have. A lot of WIPs. About to expose myself on a lot of different fandoms lol(I have a million different sideblogs that I organize a lot of the things I like by)

• Didn’t Your Momma Ever Tell You Not to Talk to Strangers? — Bo Sinclair x Reader (House of Wax) *I am also converting this one to an "Original" piece so I can publish it as a serial, so if you see the other version on Amazon under the pen name "M.E. Roselli" that's me. I'm still going to keep writing it as this fanfic, but there IS an alternate version. The other version is about a cult instead of Wax; instead of Vincent, Bo("Buck" in the alternate version) has a twin sister who was raised to be the cult's messiah. The cult is dead and gone along with their parents, but she's still living it. I just know that a lot of people's fanfics are being stolen, so I wanted to clear up that that is NOT the case with mine.

• Holmes and Dracula VS. Jack the Ripper — Original Work (Sherlock Holmes and Dracula team up to stop Jack the Ripper from bringing about the Apocalypse)

• Tides of Lust — Original Work (Meliora, a traveling bard with demonic blood, goes on a pirate adventure with a feared disciple of Davy Jones and also meets a Vampiric Warlord)

• What The Dead Men Say — Original Work (Ivar Ragnarsson ends up in Victorian England, where he has little choice but to team up with an archeologist; was technically an ACV fic originally, but I hate the ISU stuff and refuse to include it so really it’s just a history fic tbh)

• Playing House with Private X — Original Work (A cryogenically frozen super soldier navigates the modern world with the help of a would-be super soldier who slipped through the cracks. Very slice of life; it started as a Soldier Boy fic—American Pie, but I scrubbed it of IP so I can continue it as an original work and publish it as erotic shorts)

• ‘Til Death Do Us Part — Original Work (Would-be Murder victim Judith “Jude” Carpenter tries to start a new life in a small town…where her would have been killer has taken up residence as the priest. The two must work together to survive the town’s dark secret.)

• Careful What you Wish For — Original Work (Janie, a serial killer hitchhiking to avoid capture, ends up being held prisoner by Levi, a recluse out in the middle of nowhere, and she pretends to be a helpless victim in exchange for food and a warm place to sleep. The story focuses on her disturbing inner monologue through her act.)

• Lord of Roses, Master of Thorns — Original Work (Ancient Vampiric King Alistair Val Mirron must fall in love to end his curse of immortality; Myrinthe, an odd Peasant introduced to him by and old flame, seeks to remain in the castle at all costs to avoid being forced to marry the annoying rich boy in town.)

• Taken From the Ren Faire — Original Work (This was meant to be a cheesy erotica short but I accidentally gave it a plot. Oops. Fantasy Author Vera Fox is spirited away into a fantasy world after drinking some strange mead from an interesting new vendor. She ends up in a fake relationship with a former bandit while he tries to help get her home; when they get separated, she questions if she even wants to go back to her old life, and this is only compounded when she finds her Ren Faire lover is trapped there too. This one is full of tropes because I'll be honest, I'm "Writing to Market" here, but I love the characters anyway. Owen-her Ren Faire lover- has a huge Clydesdale named Stormbreaker that he rescued from a roadside medieval themed attraction, and I love him.)

• A Marriage of Inconvenience — Homelander x Reader (The Boys; Amazon Show)

• Woven Sagas — Eivor Wolfkissed x Ivar Ragnarsson (Assassin’s Creed Valhalla)

• Mother — Skyrim Fic about my Dragonborn raising Aventus

• Critical Darling — Homelander x OC(Darcy Hayes, Dreamweaver) (The Boys; Amazon Show)

• In All My Dreams I Drown — Reaver x Sparrow (Fable 2)

Tags: I am abysmal at remembering URLs off the top of my head, but I will try. @sketchy-rosewitch @visceravalentines @rottent33th @ventiswampwater

[realcube]

her prince || fairytale au! iida x reader

summary: you disguise as a princess in order to get into a formal event at the palace with the intention of killing the king but then you encounter the prince, soon to be king, and he’s a bit more charming than you’d like to admit.

(a/n): idk this might be a royalty au! or perhaps a medieval au! but idek tbh

tw// fem! reader, poison, mentions of animal zapping, begging, a bit of meanie iida

“Why does (y/n) get to be the princess?” Your friend, and fellow member of the SOIR, whined from beside you. “She has the most peasanty features out of us all!” 

Everyone else in the base groaned in union at her constant whining about the assigned roles, the ring leader of this operation — otherwise known as Katsuki Bakugo — finally broke his elongated silence as he previously seemed quite invested in whatever he was scribbling. 

Suddenly, he shot up from his desk then proceeded to slam his fist against it, causing all of it’s contents to tremble, “Shut up! As if you’re one to talk about peasanty features, Mina!” He barked at the girl, his aggressive demeanour faltering once he noticed how his hostility caused you to wear an alarmed expression. 

“We need her natural charm on the field, anyway.” he muttered, hastily sitting back down at his desk. Kirishima, Sero and Kaminari all had to do their best to suppress their snickers and focus on the tasks they had been given. However, they were all struggling as it was simply comedy gold to see their boss have such an evident crush on (y/n) but simultaneously be so far deep in denial for the sake of his pride.

Bakugo grabbed the scroll he had been writing on for the last few hours and held it up to display what looked like a numbered list, written in cursive. Therefore, you were unable to read it. In fact, none of you were able to read it; Bakugo was the only literate one among you, hence the reason why he immediately assumed leader of this operation even though it was originally your idea.

Upon noticing all of your blank expressions as you stared at what looked like a glorified piece of paper, he cleared his throat so he could begin explaining what he wrote to you. “I wrote out the plan-of-action for us to follow tomorrow but I forgot that you are all dunces so I’m going to have to read it aloud for you, aren’t I?”

You all nodded in unison which was promptly followed by Bakugo rolling his eyes once more and turning to read the plan.

“SOIR — stage one in (the) revolution — plan of action. Written and led by Katsuki Bakugo, soon to be King Explosion Murder!” He smiled to himself but it was accompanied by a chorus of groans from the rest of you.

“Step one; Kaminari steals a horse from his dad’s farm at exactly 5:15PM, rides it to the outskirts of the village so Sero can hook it up to the carriage. Meanwhile, Mina will assist (y/n) in putting on her gown and help ensure Kirishima puts on his suit and make-up properly. Afterwards, both parties will meet up by the carriage.

Step two; Sero will be coachman for the carriage to take (y/n) and Kirishima to the castle. Take the desired route and you should arrive at the palace by 6PM. 

Step three; Sero will drop off Kirishima and (y/n) then ride back to this base immediately, where Kaminari, Mina and myself will already be waiting. As for (y/n) and Kirishima, they will try to get into the palace and keep a low profile.”

You sighed, aware of how much Bakugo hates to be interrupted during his ‘serious monologue’, and you could tell it was one of those as he used your real names rather than the nicknames he’d given to you like ‘dunceface’ or ‘the pauper’. However, you just had to interject as you were yet to be filled in with some crucial information to your part of the operation.

“Bakugo,” You halted him as he finished his sentence, quickly averting your gaze to the floor as you had a habit of losing your train of thoughts as you looked into his fierce crimson eyes. “How are we supposed to get in? Are there any openings or secret passages you’ve located?” Your eyes widened in excitement at the idea that you could be like a proper assassin; using secret passages, going undercover, dealing with poison and all that good stuff! 

“No.” Bakugo replied bluntly, instantly shooting down any dreams you had of this being a cool mission. “Security on the palace will extremely tight considering this is a royal event. Only people who received an invite from the palace — hence, on the guest list — are allowed in, but I’ve already dealt with that obstacle--”

“You mean I dealt with that obstacle!” Kaminari cut him off with an offended tone before turning to look at you and Kirishima. “I was the one who zapped that messenger raven out of the sky to steal the invitation!” 

“Shut it, moron!” Bakugo barked, slamming his fist against the desk once again to grab everyone’s attention, his palm emitting tiny, and very much illegal, explosions. He slowly shifted his gaze on to you and spoke in an eerily soft tone, “Anyway, you and Kirishima will go under the aliases of ‘Princess Momo Yaoyorozu from the Yaoyorozu isles, and company’. So you will be able to waltz right in there, just don’t act suspicious.”

“How come (y/n) gets a cool, noble name and I am just ‘company’. Also, if my role is unspecified then why do I have to be her father? Can’t I just be her brother or something so I don’t have to wear that silly old-person wig?” Kirishima whined, immediately followed by Bakugo glaring daggers at him. 

“No, idiot, you have to be her father. If you dress as an old man then you’d be more likely to get in close proximity to the King.” Bakugo replied, impatience laced in his voice. He prided himself in coming up with such a logical excuse on the spot when in reality, the reason he wanted Kirishima to dress up as an old man was to guarantee that you don’t fall for him while on this mission. I mean, no matter how ravishing Kirishima was, how could you find him the least bit attractive while he looked like he was on the brink of extinction?

Kirishima grumbled inaudible curses under his breath as he slumped back in his chair defeatedly. Followed by Bakugo trying to resume his lecture but ceasing to do so as the familiar sound of groans erupted from all of you. 

“You’ve been over the last part of the plan, like, ten times already. Just today!” Mina pointed out, folding her arms of her chest and jutting her bottom lip out in disapproval. 

Sero hastily agreed with the girl, “Yeah! Here, I’ll summarise it for you.” Sero snickered before clearing his throat to prepare for his Bakugo impression, “ ‘You guys will sneak poison into the King’s quiche or whatever then I, King Explosion Murder, will come marching in to save the day and reclaim the land by declaring myself the new king! Bow to me, peasants!’ ” 

You and Mina both giggled at Sero’s rather accurate, yet satire, impersonation of the leader himself. While Kaminari and Kirishima both jokingly bowed to Sero, robotically muttering ‘all hail, king explosion murder.’

“Hey! Quit it!” Bakugo bellowed, furrowing his eyebrows as he clasped his hand together and pressed inwards, forcefully repressing his urge to blow up the whole fucking base. “I’m not going to go over the plan again so if one of you dumbasses mess it up tomorrow then you’re getting a boot to the face, got it?” 

“Yes, Lord Explosion Murder.” You all said monotonously in concert.

“You’re all fools!”

»»—————-　♔　—————-««

Step one, two and three had went smoothly. It almost seemed to good to be true.

Kaminari successfully managed to borrow the horses without anyone noticing, Mina did a spectacular job of making Kirishima look like an old man — as well as the skilful embroidery on your dress — and Sero managed to drive you here with all your limbs still intact. 

As for you and Kirishima, you both mastered the role of snobby aristocrats surprisingly fast, considering you both came from extremely deprived families. But it was as if the lifestyle just came naturally to you, hence you were both able to enter the castle without a problem.

However, no amount of acting expertise would allow you to hide the star-struck look which took over your features as you admired the massive Corinthian hall which you had the honour of stepping into. Crystal chandeliers hung from the ceiling, providing light along with the pale candles which sat in the alcoves of the walls. The roof was jaw-droppingly high and was expertly painted with detailed images of religious scenes; angels, the virgin mary, jesus, fairies, dragons, everything. 

At the other side of the hall sat none of than the King himself, looking smugly upon the crowds of people that filled his ballroom as he sat upon his extravagant throne, made of gold mined by slaves and welded together by citizens of the kingdom who were currently in poverty, but who the king also claimed to care so deeply about.

Disgusting. Consequent to seeing that evil vermin, your look of awe immediately dropped.

Your eyebrows knitted together as you simply could not avert your gaze from that man and his generally villainous demeanour that everybody just seemed to ignore. With a sigh, you leaned back against a pillar and mused, “Ugh, look at that vile creature just sitting here like he owns the place, just wait until he gets a taste of his own medicine. Right, Kirishima?”

You spoke, spinning your head around to look at your red-haired partner after you received nothing but a muffled ‘huh?’ as an answer. “What do you mea- oh!” you instantly cut yourself off upon realising that who you were spilling your plans to was not Kirishima but rather some dashing young man who was currently stuffing his was with damper bread.

“I- I am so sorry, sir. I thought you were someone else. Erm, uh, I shall take my leave now.” You stuttered, swiftly turning on your heels to bolt off in search of Kirishima but you were stopped in your tracks by the man scarfing the last piece he was holding to offer out his hand to you.

“No need to apologise! I, too, mistook you for someone else. That is why I was eating so gluttonously in your presence, my apologies.” He said, leaning forward into a bow to press a gentle kiss on your chuckles once you gave him your hand.

“I’m Tenya Iida, by the way. It’s a pleasure to meet you!”  He spoke, his tone suddenly becoming a lot less formal after he straightened up from his bow while slowly retracting his hand. “And would I be right in assuming that you are Princess Yoayorozu of the Yoayorozu Isles?”

Now that he was standing straight, without a pudding in his hand, you could take a moment to discretely examine him. He stood tall with his shoulders back and his head high to perfectly balance his glasses on the bridge of his nose, everything about his posture screamed ‘royalty’, not to mention his blue undercut which was slicked back into a loose comb-over. As for his outfit, he wore a white shirt along with a royal blue tie which complemented his blazer which was a similar shade, with the kingdom’s crest positioned on the left hand side of his chest. There was also his straight-legged navy trousers, his black derby shoes and his matching designer watch but what really brought the outfit together was his bold, enchanting smile. 

You blinked a few time as it took a moment for that name to register in your mind but once it, you nodded rapidly in response. “Ah, yes, that would be me.” You chirped casually until his name finally clicked in you’re head, “Wait, are you Iida Tenya like- the king’s son Iida Tenya or?” You inquired, trying to act ‘casual’ as if you hadn’t been practising many week preparatory for today but the nervous look in your eyes was unconcealable.

Iida couldn’t help but chuckle at how bewildered you seemed while asking that question, “Well, yes, unfortunately.” He mumbled the last part but it was still said clearly enough for you to hear. “As you are probably aware, today is my coronation. But to say that I’m dreading the crowning is an understatement.”

You quirked an eyebrow at this new information. Well, it wasn’t really knew. The whole of SOIR knew that the formal event was going to the coronation for the new king. Hence, you and Kirishima were made aware that you had two targets to eliminate, but if you had known that the to-be king was such a cutie nice guy then perhaps you would’ve fought his case.

Logically speaking though, for this plan to work, both targets had to be eliminated. It was pointless to only poison the current king, as the crown would already be Tenya’s since the dinner which you planned to spike was going to be served after the crowning. And if you only poisoned Iida, not only would that upset you but the king would simply hand his status over to Tensei, who had been pushed back in the line for the crown due to his impairments after leading and fighting in many wars. 

But, how could you kill Tenya when he was just so...charming?

None the less, somebody had to it. The lives of many citizens were in your hands tonight, as success would lead to improved situations for all. Once the monarchy is gone, there will be nobody stopping you from using your quirks freely! Plus, the royals would no longer hoard all the luxury and wealth of the kingdom, so everybody would be able to lead happy lives, free from financial burdens.

The list goes on but for now, you just had to look that fetching prince right in the eyes and think to yourself, ‘he’s the reason i’m poor’; which was easy to believe considering that the watch adorning his left wrist was probably worth enough to free your whole family from poverty.

It somewhat worked, but not really. The way his honeyed crimson eyes would gaze into your own was enough to make your heart flutter but you mentally reassured yourself that you were most definitely not falling and heart palpitations were just a symptom from your lack of sleep.

“Anyway,” Iida began once more, the tips of his ears heating up as he realised that he had been staring at you for an elongated amount of time. “It has been lovely speaking to you today but it’s about time that I take my leave, duty calls.”  He said, mentally scolding himself for being such a creep and hoping that you paid no mind to his lengthened gaze.

“Ah, alright, I wouldn’t want to keep you any longer than needed.” You sung, awkwardly fidgeting with your fingers as you recalled the ‘manner classes’  Bakugo made you and Kirishima take part in to help you avoid instances like this where you had no clue how to formally end an interaction, with a prince of all people.

It was a long shot but it was your best guess. You swiftly grabbed Iida’s hand, pulled it up to your face and before he had time to react, you planted a kiss on his knuckles — just like had done to you — before bolting off into the sea of aristocrats to go find Kirishima. Leaving Iida standing, blushing more than ever, slightly confused but mostly amused. 

“She’s really something.” He muttered to himself, scratching the side of his neck before hurriedly marching towards the throne, in search of his brother.

Although their interaction was brief, Iida would be lying if he said he wasn’t silently praying that he’d run into the girl again.

»»—————-　♔　—————-««

Step 4 went perfectly. 

‘mingle for exactly 10 minutes until food preparation. Then, (y/n) will use her quirk to sneak into the kitchen while Kirishima distracts anyone that could catch her in the act.’

Bakugo’s gruff voice echoed throughout your head like that of a siren, as you waited for the perfect opportunity to spike the three large, extravagant platters of food laying on the golden trolley which was rumoured to deliver all three of the king’s daily meals. 

At first you thought you had an issue as you had no idea which meal belonged to which person, they all looked almost identical, meaning that you might accidently poison the wrong meal, hence murder Tensei in vain. However, then you recalled a piece of wisdom Bakugo had given you offhandedly once, ‘y’know, there’s a tradition in this kingdom stating that the elders should be served the most salad on the side of a dish — so hand over your cucumbers, bitch!’

So with that in mind, your arm emerged from the shadows once most of the cooks had cleared from the kitchen to tend to other duties, and you dropped some of the poison into the dish with the most salad and the dish with the least to ensure that Tensei got to see the light of tomorrow. 

I mean, you could’ve just poisoned all three to avoid doing all that critical thinking but not only was it risky, you also kind of had a soft spot for Tensei despite the fact he was basically double your age.

Utilising the shadows as your disguise, you stuck out of the kitchen yet you were unable to find a pathway back into the ballroom since there were just so many chefs crowding around the entrance to kitchen. You were sure to get caught if you exited the shadows from there but luckily, there was alternative.

There was a back door of the kitchen which led out into the grand garden, allowing the chefs to waft the smoke out and into the open air, if needed. So through the shadows, you were able to sneak out into the garden without being noticed by a single person. 

Or so you thought.

As you jumped out of the shadows and swiftly turned a corner to look for a route back into the palace, you were greeted by a familiar face that wore an incredibly stunned expression. From behind their glasses, they squinted to try recognise you through the dark night. 

“Oh, Ms Yaoyorozu.” Iida chuckled, awkwardly rubbing the back of his neck as he realised that it was you he had bumped in to during his attempt at ditching his own coronation. Also, since he had just witnessed you doing a rather illicit act. “I’m not sure if you were ever made aware, but quirk usage is very much forbidden in this kingdom.”

You blinked rapidly, surprised at how oddly level-headed he was being about having just watched you sneak out of the kitchen, “Oh-” you choked, looking around to see if anybody else was around but the coast seemed to be clear; well, as far as you could tell, but that wasn’t easy considering the foggy night appeared to fleece everything. “I am so sorry. I was never told about such rules but I’ll be su--”

“Yes, you were.” 

There was a while of silence between the two of you. To say you were taken aback was a understatement, why was he suddenly so confrontational? And why did he say that with such a nasty look in his eyes? Does he know something you do not? Even though you had only met him barely an hour ago, you could still tell that his comment was quite out-of-character. Hence you were hardly able to stammer out a reply, “W-w- um, was I?”

The tip of Iida’s lips twitched upwards as examined your bewildered expression; it brought him infinite amounts of amusement at how ignorant you must’ve thought he was to imagine that he could fall for your silly little ploy. 

“Yes. Well, I mean, Ms Yaoyorozu had knowledge of these laws; the rules of the kingdom were attached to the invite, but you’ve made it rather clear that you’re not Yaoyorozu.”  The words rolled off his tongue, each one sharper than the last; he didn’t plan on calling you out on your impersonation tonight but as his eyes skimmed over the terrified expression on you face, he was immensely glad that he did.

“So, tell me, who are you? Other than a scum-of-the-earth imposter that deserves to rot in slums for the rest of their poor, pathetic life.

You faltered slightly at his threat before blurting out, “Momo’s cousin.”

Iida snorted, but quickly tried to force a serious scowl back onto his features, “Exactly how gullible do you think I am?”

At this point, you were at a loss. The prince stood angry in front of you; meaning that it only took a yell for most of the guards in the palace come marching over to you, before tossing into the dungeon cell which you would have no choice but to call home for the rest of your life.

So if you didn’t act fast and wisely, this could be the last moment of freedom you’ll ever experience.

Throwing away your pride, you dropped to your knees in front of the prince, leaning forward to press your forehead against the shining tops of his derby shoes as you cried, but not loud enough to catch the guard’s attention.

 “Please, your highness! I- I’m just a kid; like you! I swear I wasn’t here to cause trouble, I just--” your pleas were cut off by your own saliva getting temporarily caught in your throat but this gave you the opportunity to conjure up a believable excuse.

“I just--” you repeated, desperately attempting to come up with something until you mindlessly blurted out, “I just wanted to feel like royalty! Please give me another chance!”

Iida eyes widened at this; was it too far-fetched to believe that you created an elaborate plan to sneak into the palace, all for the ‘aesthetic’? Perhaps. But the way your glossy, sorrow-filled eyes looked up at him from the ground made his heart sink to his stomach while a sickly feeling ascended to his throat.

He felt so guilty.

In a moment of panic, he used his power to threaten and frighten a poor girl to the point where she was now begging for life on the paving beneath him. Although you were technically a felon, there seemed to be no malicious intentions behind your crime so why should you be prosecuted for it? Yet Iida still used his status to instil fear into you, solely to feel superior.

Perhaps he is not as different from his father as he once thought; a horrible feeling really, as Tenya despised no one more than that man. Iida wants no association with him or the horrible monocracy established in the kingdom. Which is why he chose to run away from his coronation. He hoped to fake his own kidnapping for a few weeks, then he’d come out of hiding and pray that Tensei had been given the crown instead.

He couldn’t bare seeing you on the dirty ground any longer so he hastily took your hand to assist you in standing back upright, “It’s-- you’re pardoned, just please come with me. This’ll only take a moment.” 

At this point you’d just go along with anything he said, under the assumption that if you disobeyed, you’d be banished. So you trailed behind him, his hand acting as your guide since you could hardly see past the tears which clouded your vision. 

You both approached a white wooden gazebo with a matching pale metal bench, he quickly took a seat and pulled you down next to him, sandwiching your hand in-between his own and caressing the back with his thumb as he waited patiently for you blubbers to die down. 

His lips fell into a frown as he watched you desperately wipe the tears away from under your eyes but smear your expertly applied mascara in the process, “My sincerest apologies; I don’t know what came over me.” He spluttered, harshly biting his bottom lip to silence himself. 

You took deep breaths, hurriedly trying to compose yourself before the prince snapped at you again. So, once the tears had stop brimming in your eyes, you looked at him with a ready expression. However, your faint sniffles, red eyes and smudged make-up didn’t do a good job at reinforcing it.

“Alright,” Iida started, removing one of his hands from yours to push his glasses up the bridge of his nose. “I understa--”

“Are you going to imprison me?”

Iida choked on thin air, his eyes widening at your random — but seemingly genuine — inquiry. “Good heavens, no! Never! What makes you think that?” Was he really that menacing? He was only a prince and he was already using his authority for intimidation. Iida could only imagine how mad with power he’d become if he were to take the crown.

Good thing he wasn’t going to. 

The reality of the situation you were in hit you like a truck as you caught a glimpse of the time from Iida’s designer watch since he had his hand resting upon your knee. You inhaled sharply, doing your best to compose yourself, “Sir-”

“No need to call me ‘sir’, I’m Tenya. Plus, we’re around the same age so ‘sir’ is hardly appropriate.” He chuckled, his lips forming a reassuring smile. In any other case, he’d go by Iida but he didn’t want you to associate him with his father in any sense, even if it was just by surname.

“Oh, how rude of me. I completely forgot to ask, what’s your name? And you have my word that I won’t do anything spiteful with this information.”

“I’m (y/n).” You replied without a second though, before continuing, “Your crowning is supposed to be in 10 minutes, correct? I think you should get going.” You hummed, trying your best to hide how tense and conflicted you were. If Iida doesn’t bugger off right now then he’s gonna miss the ceremony which will lead to a high chance of the event being rescheduled, therefore you’re going to have to act out this plan all over again! How many more messenger ravens does Kaminari need to zap?! 

But on the other hand, there was some part of you that really didn’t want him to leave for some reason; perhaps you enjoyed his company a little more than you’d like to admit. Another part of you said that he doesn’t deserve to die, he’s too nice of a guy; then you remembered the evil, corrupt glint in his eyes as he told you about the fate he wished upon you just a few minutes ago, then you didn’t feel as bad.

Your kind reminder was met by Iida simply shaking his head, “Absolutely not! There is no way I can leave you after I said those horrible things. Plus, it’s not as if I want to be king, anyway.” He mumbled the last part but of course you heard it as his face was only a few inches away from yours.

“Why don’t you want to be king?” 

Iida didn’t even hesitate to reply with the response that had been waiting on the tip of his tongue, “I shan’t participate in the monarchy. I plan on staying in hiding for a week before coming out, hopefully by then Tensei will be crowned king and I will get to lead the army instead.” 

As soon as his plan fell from his lips, his eyes immediately widened. Why was he telling you this?! I mean, now that you knew his plan, once he ‘goes missing’ you could easily tell the king that this was part of his scheme all along, in which case the king wouldn’t crown Tensei and instead send out search parties for Tenya. But then again, why would the king listen to a pauper like you? No offence, it’s just that those who come from a lower social status are less likely to be allowed in the castle, and less likely to meet the king. 

So he reasoned to himself that there was no harm in telling you his plan, but a part of him couldn’t help but wonder why he subconsciously felt comfortable enough to tell you in the first place. I mean, he’s only known you for an evening; surely there’s no why he’s caught feelings this fast, right?

Your heart skipped a beat upon hearing his circumstances, thinking that this was the end of SOIR, but the more you thought about it, you realised that perhaps this was a good thing. 

This meant that — assuming the king eats the meal prepared for him regardless of the ceremony — the king will be dead so the only person you’d have to eliminate was Tensei who was widely known to be more lenient about the rules of the kingdom. I mean, he let his troops take a water-break during battle for goodness’ sake! Assassinating him should be a piece of cake, especially for the SOIR.

Also, this ensures that you won’t have to kill Tenya, which is a thought that made you oddly happy and relieved. 

Sniffling quietly, you rubbed beneath your eyes to further mess up the eyeliner and mascara Mina had done for you. Then you hummed, “Oh, that’s cool, Tenya.”

“And I would like for you to be my bride once I emerge from hiding!” 

You froze, blinking rapidly and inquiring further in hopes that perhaps you misheard him, “Huh? Your what?”

“Bride!” He chirped, scanning the baffled look on your face and figuring that he should elaborate, “See, I think it works in both of our favours; you get to live a somewhat royal life and I get to settle down with someone who my father did not pick out for me. Plus, though I’m no love expert, I can definitely feel something special between the two of us. I hope that’s not just me being a fool. But anyway, I completely understand if you refuse, marriage is a huge commitment.”

Even after he finished explaining, you still sat there staring at him, absolutely flabbergasted that he really just asked you to marry him. Also, quite shocked that there was a scarily large part of you that wanted to accept his offer. 

“Tenya, we literally just met a few hours ago.”

“Six, to be exact.” he corrected you, accompanied by a little shrug as to say ‘who cares?’

“And we are both sixteen.” You continued to rationalise but talking to Iida when he’s dead-set on something was like talking to a brick wall; a brick wall that provided logical arguments, the worst kind of wall.

“The average life expectancy in this kingdom is 35 years of age so if you think about, we’re basically half way through our lives already. Why not settle down?” 

Although, his statements were annoying as hell, the charming smile that decorated his face while he spoke was enough to convince that he was right. Despite the fact those statistics were clearly a sample from the lower class; royalty would obviously live to a much higher age. Plus, he was definitely correct about the special feeling between the two of you, like you have genuinely never felt more endeared by a person’s presence before, especially after they were just wishing hellfire upon you a few minutes ago. six, to be exact

As he sat there and exchanged a longing gaze with you, the voice in your head that wanted you to accept his proposal was getting larger and larger by the second, drowning out the voice that strictly wanted to put an end to his clownery and that voice sounded eerily like bakugo. You’re a woman of logic, and logic says you should accept. Because, if you say no, there’s no turning back and you’ll probably never get another opportunity like this again in your life. But if you say yes, you have two whole weeks to make up your mind as to whether you actually want to marry him or not, and if you don’t, you can always break up with him after he comes out of hiding. Additionally, you’ll be able to go back to the base and confer with the SOIR as to what you should do. Also, you were kinda in love with him, but logic disregards love.

Iida moved his hand from your knee to hold both of your hand in his own while his gaze filled with yearned remained locked onto your eyes, he’s truly never seen anyone more beautiful before. Despite the fact you make-up was ruined, tears were stained to your face and mascara was smeared under your eyes, you still looked ten times more divine than any queen he’s ever seen. 

“So, (y/n), what do you say?”

[gayregis]

tbh as a polish person genuinely vibing with any kind of mostly english speaking witcher fandom is kinda hard bc theres just. so many small mistakes and just a feeling of Wrongness in the translation that couldve been fully avoided? like using womanizer instead of whoremonger for dandelion or saying comrade instead of friend etc and like im mad bc with some more effort it couldve been done way better and actually carried over more of the og atmosphere for international readers And It Didnt

i agree with you from the ‘can only read the english translations’ side. i feel like definitely the official UK translations shifted a lot of the meanings, of course i do not know how it is in every single scene, but from the lengthy posts i’ve read on reddit, some posts i’ve read on tumblr, and conversations i’ve had with mutuals over discord, plus just generally reading the books and saying to myself “wait, this doesn’t sound... cohesive?” i agree that are are a lot of changes that shift the perspective. 

one part of this is the deliberate mistranslation of general vocabulary used with the intention (i think) to give a more “medieval-ish fantasy” vibe to the work. i feel like david and danusia really went for some british slang that gives it a more “english medieval” feel (or at least, how medieval england is conceived of in the modern english-speaking imagination), when more widely-known words without such specific connotations (for the speaker and for the subject) would be more appropriate. 

for example, i have heard that a lot of the translations of “maiden” or “wench” are more akin to “girl/woman” in the original text. another example is “comely lad” VS “pretty boy,” two translations (the former official, the latter fan-translated) that mean the same thing essentially but the former one is “brit-ified” (to me, at least). and i know that sometimes the translators chose specific words to keep a “peasant-speak” vibe with the usage of specific language, for example, with milva, but instead of being confined to peasantry, it extends across a lot of characters. 

another part is figures of speech that don’t translate over due to being polish-specific idioms, or being reliant on the polish grammar structure. imo the translators are too eager to replace these with english figures of speech/idioms. a lot of the time when polish fans have pointed this out and said, this is different in the original text, the original idiom is so-and-so, which basically means this-and-this, i am able to understand the translated idiom, when it is in context. 

for example, i believe that in the english version of baptism of fire dandelion says to regis, “was it just you and your shadow?” and regis replies, “worse, i don’t even cast one.” but in the original text, the exchange goes something more like “were you drinking to the mirror?” “worse, i don’t even show up in mirrors.” the idiom “drinking to the mirror” meaning drinking alone does not exist in english, but it would have been at least a little obvious to me as a reader what the meaning of the idiom is. i suppose it is up to preference, but i would prefer to have the original figures of speech kept intact, with a little footnote at the bottom included for explaining context / what its meaning is.

another part is cultural references and history that end up getting lost. references to other works, etc. 

an example is in the edge of the world when torque says “good night” at the end to geralt and dandelion. without knowing the phrase, “where the devil says goodnight,” this is completely meaningless. and context about polish/broader european history is mostly also lost on a non-polish audience, because it is not something that is basic knowledge.

it doesn’t just extend to polish references, for example, regis quotes cicero quoting one of the seven sages, “omnia mea mecum porto,” basically “all that’s mine i carry with me,” which ig is a nod to how regis is a philosopher and lives simply, is a humanist, etc.

and this isn’t even beginning to touch all of the arthurian stuff he put in there.

mostly, i end up being clueless because i do not know what the original text was, and i know that if i could see the original text, i would not understand it and would need it explained to me. 

i guess a positive side of this is that i like uncovering what was originally said and hearing it explained, scouring the internet for someone who has addressed a specific passage or something... it helps foster some conversation, kind of like two kids comparing christmas presents - what’s in your translation? what’s in your translation? what’s in the original text? - it is fun to see everyone start posting pictures and screenshots of their books, like trying to unravel a mystery as a group, and i enjoy that, especially when there are more international translations than just polish original and english translation, i like seeing the czech, russian, spanish, french translations and then learning things from these languages/cultures/countries because they showed up in the text.

on the other hand, it hinders discussion because if people are operating on different translations, they will have widely different perspectives of the characters based upon what the characters said or how they were described. you are not the only person i’ve heard express this sentiment, and agreed that it’s difficult to “genuinely vibe” across language barriers regarding the series. polish geralt is a totally different character from english geralt, from what i’ve heard, to summarize it.

and even if you do research as an english-speaking person to find out the mistranslations, the meanings behind certain phrases or references, etc., you still will probably never understand it fully, nor will you uncover everything there is to uncover. 

i dislike leaving it like this, but it kind of “is what it is” with the language barriers and translations. a lot of the original atmosphere wasn’t and possibly will never be fully translated over (in some cases, it may be impossible). i would say don’t feel like you “have” to engage with every fan of the witcher books, if you feel you don’t vibe with english speaking witcher fandom that is okay and i hope that no one would judge you for it, everyone should hang out and talk with who they want to hang out and talk with. but i also get the disappointment because you want to connect, but there is just a lack of understanding. it shouldn’t be the burden to fall on you to be like, hey guys actually in the original text this scene is different / you’re misinterpreting this-- but if you ever want to say or make posts like this, i think this would be great and a contribution to the community. i would also say idk if it is possible if the interpretations are extremely different, but some broader themes like family, love, humanity, etc. imo do join the fans of the books in some way or another, big or small, despite how wonky the translations get. and finally, i want to say i am not here to give advice or consolation, because i certanly don’t know what can be done about this, i just want to respond to this and say that you’re not alone.

[jeanjauthor]

What’s the duties of a duke of his household in peacetime?

The duties of a Duke are the same as any noble, baronet, baron, viscount, count, earl, margrave, duke, grand duke, and of course the other gender versions, baronetta, baroness, viscountess, countess, marchioness, duchess, grand duchess... But whether or not a noble *followed* those duty expectations is, of course, up to the individual, whether they’re a genuine caring person or an entitled douchebag asshole. (Pardon my language but honestly...yeah.)

Anyway, the original premise of nobility vs. common folk was that because they could afford things like weapons and horses (which made combat easier), they were to protect their immediate neighbors in exchange for being given a bit of support in terms of food, goods, funds, etc.  This literally goes back thousands of years in Europe, all the way into the days of prehistoric civilizations (think of the grand burial mount civilizations, for example; archaeological finds have showed that those who could afford to keep & ride horses were given higher status, and were far more likely to have weapons buried with them).

By the time it becomes officially stratified in the records with various levels of nobility, baron to duke, etc, the primary job of protecting the people still exists, but the *method* has now varied.  Depending on culture, era, nation, etc, dukes don’t necessarily *have* to personally lead troops into battle.  (Please decide this for your created cultures in advance.)  This could still be done via raising a levy of home troops, seeing that they’re trained (mandatory monthly training weekend?), and drilled, and ready to fight...but it’s not always necessary.

By the era where nobles are stratified into dukes vs counts vs barons, etc, most of the time standing armies did exist (if small and padded with conscription during times of war).  This often meant the duke (or whatever rank) could negotiate for paying for part of those army forces via tax monies that could be used to pay the soldiers or pay for provisions, or products from their craftspeople (leather goods, clothing, weapons, vehicles, etc, and/or produce from their farms (actual produce like grains, vegetables, preserved meats, or living animals such as horses and oxen for pulling supply wagons, etc).

Now that we now what wartime possibilities are like, we can set that aside and focus on peacetime.  They would still be responsible for being able to provide goods and services and funds for any standing army, paying taxes to their sovereign, etc.  They might even (depending on the culture, think England and its longbowmen, yeomen) still have to maintain a yearly quota of trained fighters (in this case longbow archers).  There was a long period of time when, by law, all able-bodied males in England had to train with a longbow for X amount of time a month.  A conscientious noble--regardless of gender--would see to this, and see that there would be an adequate supply of well-crafted longbows, and a plethora of arrows.

This training would extend to the members of their own household.  In a typical keep / castle, there would often be a bow in every single room with windows or window slits facing to the outside, along with a supply of arrows, so that anyone within that room during a time of battle or even siege could pick up the weapon, string it, and use it to defend against invaders.  This means that there would be an expectation of anybody who could physically draw a bowstring would spend at least some time every week practicing those skills.  A good noble would ensure that all genders could do so, even in times of peace.

Moreover, a duke, et al, would have a trained force of guards to patrol the roads within their domain, to try to keep them free of bandits, scout for raiders or unusual incursions from a neighbor’s own armed forces...because war with your neighbors was not uncommon; resources were fought over, herd beasts were rustled, taxes would be “demanded” by the greedy from peasants who weren’t in that noble neighbor’s demesne (domain), etc.  It didn’t even have to be outright warfare to require constant vigilance.

And of course there would be the need to enforce certain laws.  Sometimes it was stupid classist gatekeeping bullshit like sumptuary laws (at one point the only fur commoners could wear was squirrel fur, which made winters hellaciously difficult to survive, and much of the Middle Ages did experience a Little Ice Age, so such laws were doubly punitive, and I hope those who created such laws suffered horribly from the diseases of the day)..  Sometimes it was a genuinely good law, like no you cannot beat your wife to death without it being called murder.  (Seriously, I would not last long in the Middle Ages, because I’d be too damn feminist to be “allowed” to live...)

Anyway, aside from the need to keep the roads clear for commerce and travel, to watch for neighbors slipping into raiding, to uphold the law, etc, technically a good noble’s next and utterly non-combat-associated duty would be to use their plenty, their excess, their ability to be generous and charitable with their extra resources...to be generous and charitable.  There was a long-standing tradition of expectations that a noble would take care of the poorest within their domain.  Cottages and daily meals for the elderly & infirm, help for those families devastated by illness, extra food in times of famine, and of course if they owned any of the buildings their tenants lived in, it was expected that they would maintain those structures at their own expense.

Furthermore, it was expected that anyone who worked for them, from the lowly scullery boy and/or goose-tending maid, all the way up through to their seneschal (person who actually managed a particular manor and its lands whenever the noble wasn’t there visiting) got a certain amount of money and a certain number of sets of clothes every year.  (Cloth is VERY expensive to produce, pre-industrialization, btw; it could take 12-20 spinners just to keep one weaver at the loom full time.)  They would also be expected to be provided with tools for their trades, too--leather and metal for animal harnesses when plowing the fields, plows for said plowing, chisels for a woodwright or a stonecutter, etc--when doing work for the noble.  At least, a good noble would help support their craftspeople, providing good scythes at harvest time, etc.

A truly good noble would actually pitch in, too, during heavy labor periods, especially in harvest season when the weather is looking iffy.  They’d pull in their soldiers and assign them to work the fields, and even work themselves to get all the pulses (peas, beans) harvested, all the corn (medieval term for seeds of grain such as oats, wheat, rye, barley, etc) harvested, and of course properly dried and threshed and stored...in exchange for a certain amount to be given to them as taxes, to feed for said soldiers and workers, and to pass some along in the form of either food or money from sales to their higher-ups on the fealty chain.

...Of course, as time went on, most nobles considered themselves entitled to all of those items and produce and goods without pitching in personally.  This of course has lead to the GOP insisting upon holding as much power as possible without giving a damn about the common American in the modern era...but this has happened over and over and over.  The French had a little head-chopping Revolution thing about it, in fact.  Not a good look for nobles, tbh, but they really were that entitled and uncaring in their attitudes toward commoners.  (Isn’t it fun the parallels we can draw between then and now?)

One thing people in this era don’t realize is that after the Black Death swept through and wiped out 1/3rd of Europe’s population (it actually swept through several times, but this was like COVID-19 to the common flu, back then), there was such a labor shortage that the nobles were literally enticing serfs in someone else’s domain to come work for them, for twice or even three times as much pay, benefits, gifts, etc, because they needed the harvest to be brought in but didn’t have enough living people, period, to get it done without poaching their neighbors’ residents.

The Black Death ended serfdom, the custom of people being essentially bound by law to a particular patch of land as a sort of pseudo-slavery--the phrase “year and a day” was used when a serf ran away from their home patch of ground to a freely-held (not beholden to any noble) city.  If they could live there for one year and one day without being caught and dragged back, they would be considered freed...but when the Black Death hit, if you survived, you had a LOT of leverage against the nobles.  It really shifted the balance of power and the balance of wealth in Europe, because the commoners could demand a lot more in funds and supplies and equipment, etc.

(It’s like how businesses are shutting down because their workers are tired of being exploited; if these businesses won’t pay an actually livable wage...well, we’re not serfs, not boung by law (yet--watch out for the GOP, since they want to reinstitute such things bit by bit, if you read between the lines of what they’ve been attempting to pass in state and federal congressional sessions) to have to work for starvation slavery wages for our (corporate) masters...  Instead, we have a great deal of power and leverage to demand better working conditions, just as our European survivor-ancestors did post-plague.  Anyway!)

Wise nobles treated their commoners well, giving them extra pay, better living conditions regardless of how much they needed the work.  They sacrificed a little bit of their own personal wealth to ensure that their entire demense (domain) prospered.  Those that did not, often caused far more misery than humanity should have allowed...such as the so-called Irish Potato Famine.

There was NOT a famine in Ireland at the time.  English colonizer nobles who had seized the land, etc, demanded that all the good food that was growing be reserved for -their- needs, to be sold elsewhere or fed to the local animals.  The Irish had to subsist on what little of the potato harvest and a few gathered wild foods or personal tiny vegetable garden goods they could grow...and when the potato blight hit, it hit HARD, and the vast majority of the potatoes were taken up--just like all the other foods--by their English overlords, maliciously causing the actual farmers, the actual people creating & growing & tending all that food, to literally starve to death...or be imprisoned for daring to eat the food they produced, because it “didn’t” belong to them.

So when we talk about the obligations of the nobles to their households in times of peace...we have to stop and think, what kind of culture do these nobles in general promote, and what does the individual noble and/or their immediate family promote?

Because the time you get around to having stratified nobility (baronetty through duchy), you’re probably going to have a lot of people who believe they have unassailable privileges and callously inhuman entitlement rights, UNLESS there are a lot of checks-and-balances on the culture to prevent such things.

Like what, you may ask?  Well, we can look at the corporate culture of Ben & Jerry’s, the ice cream company.  I don’t know if it’s still in their bylaws, but at least for a long while, last I heard, the CEOs & board of directors could not be paid more than 7x what the lowest paid employees in the company got.  By investing their money in their employees, the company was ethically using the labor of said employees, paying them back for their hard work.

Nobles who invest in their peasantry, improving their wages, their homes, their lives & ability to do their livelihoods, will have a similar ROI, Return On Investment--they’ll be beloved, they’ll be fiercely defended, they’ll have people wanting to work for them.  We know this worked in the medieval era because when the Black Death destroyed serfdom, those nobles who “shared the wealth” with their laborers got even more prosperous, because everyone who survived wanted to work for them.

One last thing, the higher up in rank a noble is, the more lands & crafts, etc, they probably oversee...and that means the less time they have to know everyone in their domain...which can lead to them “not being in touch with the common people.”  UNLESS they make a concerted effort to get to know and stay in touch with those people.  They can do this through conscious personal effort, a family culture of careful coaching & teaching, by not having primogeniture but instead a law of picking the best heir to take over (aka not the privileged entitled asshole types who only take & take, but the ones who genuinely care and give & give), or even by laws, “Nobles can only use X amount of what they have for their personal needs and must reinvest Y amount in their demense (lands, peoples, buildings, herds, etc).”

If you’re writing an historical novel with a duke, you’ll want to research the era in which they’re set, to see what the chances of a good guy duke versus a bad guy or uncaring guy duke might be.  (There are always exceptions to the rules, but maybe they’re just unaware their policies are asshole-ish...or maybe they really are English prejudiced against the Irish, considering the Irish to be moronic animals that have opposable thumbs...really seriously, the whole potato famine was the fault of the English nobility and their goddamn colonizer attitudes...but I digress).

If you’re writing a created culture, however...you can work things to turn out differently, either by culture, by expectation, law, etc, so that it’s different from what happened in Europe (and other locations).

In my fantasy romance DestinyVerse books, mages have a great deal of power, and often end up in positions of nobility because--like having horses and weapons--a strong mage has the ability to protect a lot of people from incoming threats...but at the same time that they’re asked to protect those around them in a position of legal & cultural power... they’re expected to swear magic-binding oaths to protect the people they rule over, so that their magic literally prevents them from violating the terms of those oaths.  They have to protect the people they’ve sworn to protect from various oath-bound threats.  That’s a guarantee that Medieval Europe (or China, or India, etc) did not have...though a cleverly worded oath can still allow a mage to be an asshole in many respects.

I hope all of that helps!

#WhatDidDukesDoInTimesOfPeace

#NobleObligations

#answers

[galaxywhump]

29 Day Whump Challenge - Day 13

[Masterlist]

[Challenge]

Prompt: Burned

This was a blast to write tbh.

cw: modern slavery, forced domesticity, burns, restraints, mentions of animal cruelty, torture (+ mention of medieval torture methods), humiliation, brief gore, defiant whumpee.

~~~

“Ever heard of firewalking?”

Wren frowns and shakes his head. Daniel smiles, not lifting his gaze from the book.

It’s a nice homely scene - the two of them sitting on blankets on the floor, listening to the fire crackling in the fireplace and basking in the warmth; Daniel is reading a book, sharing excerpts or comments every now and again.

“What’s that?”

“It’s something people used to do as like… a ritual? Oh, a ‘rite of passage.’ They’d walk barefoot over hot coals or stones.”

“Huh. And they didn’t get burned?”

“No. They did it fast. And there’s some scientific stuff about the coals not being hot enough.”

“Fascinating,” Wren mutters.

Frankly, he hopes this moment of peace and safety lasts as long as possible. His hands are cuffed, sure, and his right ankle is shackled to one of the couch legs, but that’s nothing new. At least he can sit down, leaning against the couch, and be almost comfortable.

“Got anything else in there?” he asks.

“Yeah, some medieval torture methods.”

Wren feels his heart skip a beat.

“The fuck kinda book are you reading?”

“Art of Pain Across the Ages,” Daniel replies and shrugs seeing Wren wince. “Kid, I’ve been here for fourteen years with not much to do. I’ll read anything Berkeley brings me.”

“You could leave at any time, though.”

Daniel flashes a broad smile.

“I’d rather stay here. Besides, now you’re here to entertain me.”

Wren forces himself to maintain eye contact, even though icy unease spreads through his body. Suddenly the situation feels way too cozy, and his body tenses, waiting for the moment Daniel moves closer and the dreaded touch returns.

Nothing happens, however. Daniel chuckles softly and goes back to reading, and Wren exhales, his heartbeat slowing down.

“This one’s interesting. Strappado. Ever heard of it?”

Why does he keep asking that?

“No. I haven’t.”

“The victim had their hands bound behind their back and then was suspended. Usually they ended up with their arms dislocated, and it hurt like a motherfucker.” He lifts his gaze and smiles again. “Guess our version is much safer.”

Wren nods, pressing his lips tightly together. He wants nothing more than to lash out and tear the book from Daniel’s hands, because he can already imagine him getting some ideas from it.

As if Berkeley couldn’t have given him some poetry. Or a detective story. Or a cooking book, or anything other than this.

Time passes, and still nothing happens. Wren is staring into the flames, listening to Daniel reading about the Rack, the Iron Chair and the Head Crusher, and soon he closes his eyes, the cracking of fire and the rustling of pages lulling him to sleep.

He dreams about being a medieval peasant accused of heresy, sentenced to death by the Head Crusher.

Before his skull explodes into a bloody mess, however, he’s awoken by the sound of metal hitting the floor. He groans and tries to roll over, but his eyes snap open when there’s a sudden familiar grip on his hair and he’s pulled upwards, immediately stumbling.

“Ow!” he chokes out and almost falls over when he’s pulled forward. “What the fuck?!”

“Nothing to worry about, kiddo,” Daniel replies with a laugh, shifting his grip to Wren’s wrists. “Just a little surprise for you.”

“I don’t want any fucking surprises from you,” Wren hisses, too confused by the sudden awakening for the fear to set in.

“That’s just too bad. And I put so much time and effort into it.”

Wren tries to pull away, but it doesn’t work - it never works, a mocking voice in his head reminds him - and he’s forced to follow Daniel out of the house.

When he sees the surprise, he stops dead in his tracks.

“No.”

“No? I think it’s rather interesting.”

“You sick fucking-” He can’t finish as he’s pushed down the stairs and falls on his back, a choked yelp escaping him.

“Take off your shoes,” he hears and props himself up, trying to crawl away in panic. “I said: take off your shoes.”

“What the fuck,” Wren pants, putting more distance. “What the fuck-”

Daniel closes that distance in a second, pinning Wren to the ground with one heavy boot, a sickening smile on his face.

“Don’t worry, I can do it for you if it’s too hard.”

Wren struggles, but that never works either, especially with the shitty canvas shoes he’s forced to wear. At this point he knows there is no avoiding his fate, so he turns his head to the side, taking in the surprise - a square bed of coals emitting a warm, albeit terrifying, glow, surrounded by stones.

At least it’s not strappado, he thinks as Daniel throws his shoes to the side and forces him to stand up again. Or any of the other ones.

“Wait here.”

Okay, okay. I’ll just do it quickly. That’s how it works, right?

But then he sees Daniel throwing a length of chain over a branch directly above the coals and his mind starts racing again, because that doesn’t exactly look like a traditional part of firewalking.

He takes a step back and looks over his shoulder, calculating his chances of escaping.

No. Not like this.

Not with his hands immobilized, not with Daniel a few meters away from him, not before learning more about the planet, not without a way of contacting Earth.

“Come here,” he hears and straightens his back before approaching Daniel, his legs threatening to give out under him.

Grow up.

He extends his hands to Daniel, who nods and attaches the chain before going to grab its other end. 

“Let me explain this little beauty,” he says and gives the chain a light pull, smiling with pride. “What you see here is a bed of embers like the ones used in firewalking. However, this is not what you’ll be doing today.”

Wren focuses on his breathing, staring at the coals, trying to imagine the nature of pain they will bring.

“Ever been to the circus, Wren?”

He swallows hard and shakes his head.

“Such a shame.”

“Just get to the fucking point!” he yells.

“So impatient! I just wanted to tell you about one of the ancient attractions: the dancing bears.” Wren inhales sharply when Daniel pulls the chain again, forcing him to stumble a step closer to the coals. “They were taught to do it since they were cubs. I think you already know how.”

Another pull and Wren reaches the edge of the bed, forced to stand on his toes as the chain strains his arms, urging him to take another step forward.

“The bears were made to stand on hot coals, and they were ‘dancing’ to escape the heat. Interesting, don’t you think?”

“No I don’t, you sick bastard!” Wren growls before shrieking in panic when the chain tenses, causing him to lose his balance and stumble into the very center of the bed. “No!” He tries to run, get back outside, but the chain stops him from doing so; his next instinct is to use the chain to his advantage, and he lifts his feet from the coals, bringing his legs closer to his chest, his weight resting entirely on the handcuffs.

It hurts, but he’s used to it, isn’t he? He’d been suspended from the living room ceiling before. He can do it.

“Clever,” Daniel says, coming into his field of view and crossing his arms. “We’ll see how long you can keep it up.”

In the living room he was hanging limply - but now he has to keep his legs up, and his abdominal muscles are in agony.

He lets out a choked sob when his body fails him and he’s forced to stand on the embers again.

It’s not that bad in the beginning. If it really was firewalking, he thinks he’d make it.

But it’s not, and he’s not supposed to succeed - he’s supposed to entertain Daniel, to be just like those bears in the circus.

“See, you’re dancing alright,” Daniel points out, amused, watching Wren desperately jump from one foot to the other as the embers really start to hurt him. “You know, that practice quickly got outlawed, and for good reason. Those poor, poor bears.”

“Fuck you!” Wren cries out, tears streaming down his face. He takes a deep breath before resting his weight on the chain once again, trying to focus on anything other than the pain, hoping it will allow him to last longer, but his muscles are on fire, as if there was currently not enough fucking fire in his life.

At one point – and Wren has no idea how much time has passed, too absorbed with the searing pain drilling into the soles of his feet - Daniel leaves for a moment only to come back with a folding chair and a bottle of beer; he sits down ostentatiously and raises the bottle.

“Cheers, kid! What a great show.”

Wren just sobs, his eyes closed, his entire body trembling before finally giving out. He stands on the coals, too exhausted to jump or lift himself up anymore as everything around him becomes a blur and he can’t even feel the pain anymore. He twitches weakly when he hears a whooshing sound and the heat under him dies down, and the next thing he knows the chain goes lax and he falls forward, half-conscious, a single thought resonating in his tired mind.

Those poor, poor bears.

Next

[charismastaticarchive]

edelgard discourse under the cut...

i know this is a controversial take, but i think edelgard’s story would’ve been better recieved if she didn’t start out as the crown princess. the truth is, at her core---edelgard’s country has an imperialist past, but edelgard herself wants to give rights back to the vassal states (thats what her whole support with petra is about, and tbh, i would be surprised if edelgard did not one day give them back their freedom and indepedence entirely). but edelgard’s country is not the only one with an imperialist past. dimitri’s country committed a fuckin genocide? the leicester alliance’s whole arc with claude is about how they’re racist and horrible against the almyrans. and no matter what side you choose---all of fodlan is unified by that one at the very least previously imperialist and racist country.

what makes real life imperialism evil isn’t like. one medieval kingdom taking over another medieval kingdom. it’s the subjugation and oppression of whole groups of people. while dimitri, edelgard, and claude all go to war (though dimitri and claude may not start it) and then end up taking over an entire continent, none of them can really be compared to real life imperialists because the territories they’re taking over all started out as one country to begin with, they’re not taking away land, property, or liberty from peasants or people of color, and, in fact, edelgard’s war is honestly at least partially against her very own country and their outdated ideas and beliefs of racism, classism, sexism, ableism, etc. she’s enacting a revolution for a new government system for everyone including her own people---not just the leicester alliance and faerghus, and one she claims will give power to the peasants, free public education, a meritocracy where EVERYONE can govern regardless of religion, crest status, or country where u were born, AND if her supports with petra are to be believed, she wants to give brigid at the very least back their rights.

so like. in a way she’s kind of toppling the ACTUAL terrible parts of andrestia’s ACTUAL imperialism and tbh whats she’s doing is more in line with a peasant rebellion, and this would be a lot better recieved (and probably more clearly and concisely written) if she was like. an actual peasant tbh. of course this goes so much deeper because she’s really just a pawn in a larger game those who slither are playing, but she’s using them as much as they’re using her. she’s in a very precarious position, but she’s really trying to do as much good as she can within the very few years she has left on this earth.

OF COURSE. because this is a japanese game, we can criticize the fact that this marrative exists at all, that edelgard appears to be a ‘good imperialist’ that is just and righteous by every account of the crimson flower narrative (as is dimitri in his narrative which could be considered even more damning because dimitri has a lot less revolutionary politics) given japanese history, that a character that takes over other countries is actually right to do so. the writing kiiiinda is more imperialist and dangerous than the actual character, and that, genuinely, is more important than a fictional character’s politics. 

but i still think its dangerous to blindly call characters imperialists when these terms have real life meanings, real life impacts that affect real life people every single day. and imperialism isn’t so cut and dry as ‘medieval kingdom invades another medieval kingdom but the medieval ruler is a really nice and sweet anime character!’ it’s basically every terrible and evil act in human history on a global scale? it feels like an insult to everyone whose been affected by any kind of imperialism to be like ‘this anime character who squeals at mice and makes a portrait of ur character and won’t let them see it is an imperalist’ when we should be saying ‘maybe the game is the problem, maybe there are underlying issues in some sects of japanese modern day sentiments (that can be proven by the overall rise of japanese nationalism) that have bled into the game and the perspective of the writers.’ and maybe, just maybe, that’s a more important conversation to have than ‘is this anime character BAD or GOOD’

full disclosure tho: i am white+chinese, my great-uncle was a mechanic for the flying tigers during ww2, i am MORE than aware why edelgard as a character makes people uncomfortable. i understand. and i sympathize with u. i just don’t understand why JUST edelgard makes people uncomfortable and not the game itself as well when it shows through its writing in every single route uncomfortable and often prejudiced writing. shouldn’t u be uncomfortable with the whole game or at the very least the writers and the writers’ prejudices and beliefs and not just a character? it feels like a logical fallacy here of displacing emotions on a single symbol instead of the actual source of ur distress.

especially when roleplay is often about rewriting canon, making it better. ‘transformative works.’

i’m not going to tell u u should like or not like edelgard. i can definitely recognize why she makes people uncomfy, and why other people love her. i’m just saying. u should dislike the writers most of all bc the writers are real people with real harmful ideas. edelgard is just a bunch of pixels, who has some pretty good ideas at the end of the day as a revolutionary as opposed to a direct analogue to a real life imperialist.

this has turned into a whole ass essay lmao.

[flying-elliska]

Random question incoming: Is there a dish you feel like is very underrated? 🤔

haha anon good question ! (i might be slow to answer but i love random questions like these…) anyway here you asked for it, a huge incoherent rambling about FOOD OPINIONS

i feel like this is a very culturally dependent question. Like something that is underrated in some place will be super popular in another. For instance in France my mom would get this pickled herring and my dad would get on her case for it smelling bad but I always loved it ; however here in the Netherlands you can get pickled herring from the corner street fish tent, and it’s quite popular. My French grandma tasted it once and she disliked it so much she talks to me about it almost everytime she sees me lmao. Meanwhile, here it’s like a real obstacle course to find some decent bread that isn’t some overly soft, processed nonsense, ending up with me crying and spending 8 euros for a small loaf of sourdough bread at the organic market because i miss real bread so much. Also just…quality pastry. Most pastry here feels so greasy and unrefined in taste, if i can be very chauvinistic for a moment :((((((((((( i miss my chocolate eclairs and croissants aux amandes and lemon tarts. Lemon. Everything with lemon is underrated. (yeah i used to just...eat lemons as a kid. peel and all just bite into them. my love for acidic things is gonna cause me issues one day.)

Also coming here I was delighted to see how much everyone likes sweet and salty combinations, which is not the case everywhere. Like meat with fruit is just one of my favorite things ever, it has this medieval vibe that a lot of people can’t deal with.  Once for Christmas I made this pickled carrot-raisin relish to go with roasted chicken from a medieval cookbook, it was absolutely out of this world. (Although I have to say I have a Dutch friend who once put kiwi and banana in her pasta salad i have to say…NO. That’s too far lmao). I just love looking old recipes in general. I have this Game of Thrones official cookbook where they recreate the recipes from the book, with one modern and one medieval recipe and my love for this book far outlasted my love for the show, it’s just so cool and inventive. One of the most hilarious things to me is how everyone suddenly started to make this huge fuss about kale whereas in the Netherlands it’s been a staple winter food since forever. You can buy it chopped up in big bags for like 1.50 euro and mix it in potatoes, soup, stews…and we call it boerenkool, so like ‘peasant cabbage’, the last glamorous thing ever, and it’s so funny to see everyone abroad branding it as this hippie dippie thing like…it’s still cabbage. (They still try to sell it as ‘kale’ on the organic markets for 6 euro a leaf here lmao) I feel cabbage in general is quite underrated : it’s such a versatile and cheap thing. I really loved my grandma’s chou farci and i want to try to do that at some point. Also beans, beans are life, but I feel people have caught on to that one. 

When it comes to French food, there are definitely a few ‘weird’ things that I actually think are really worth trying, like snails or tripe sausage or duck hearts or whatever lmao. I just really like trying new things when it comes to food. But something that is underrated to you might be common to someone else. For instance, when I went to China in high school and stayed with my penpal’s family for a short while, we had salty breakfast almost every morning, and even though it took some time for my stomach to get used to fish so early, in the end it just blew my mind how much better i felt for the rest of the day. So now I still regularly make a rice dish with veggies in a batch that I can eat in the morning. Salty breakfast in general - really helps with energy levels and to eat in a more balanced way throughout the day. Also ? seaweed paté is one of the seven wonders of the world. and seaweed in general. I also love miso soup. Miso everything, tbh - I tried a miso glazed fish recipe not long ago and …amazing. I just love the idea that there is still so much I don’t know about food and how inventive people all over the world are and how it brings people together. 

Anyway my short answer is that food fads are stupid, and so is excessive snobbery, and pickled things are life. I think the most important thing is to have fun ;) 

[rewitalizacja]

my birthday is next week and tbh this is gonna be kinda long cause I wanna just talk about my last year, the past 9 months to be exact, cause that's when I moved, so if you don't care just scroll, I just have to vent

starting with october, the first three months were TORMENT, i moved to a new city, didn't know anyone, mine and 2 of my friends from hometown paths have split, and although I met new, amazing people i wanted to drop everything and go back. back to basically nothing cause there's nothing for me back "home" and so I had to make this new city my home and right now, after 9 hard months of college, absolute solitude and isolation i threw myslef into, growing my hair, dying it blond, dying it pink, cutting my banks (i was drunk two days ago and i fell victim to my own impulses and i cut my bangs and now i look like a medieval peasant), this sunday i will be 20, ik it's not much but it's much for me, like it's only 10 years away from being 30 come on, i can't even pull an all nighter anymore cause I'm basically dead so ye

I've struggled with a lot of crap, I've pushed myself to the limits (I'm a pusher), I've experienced feelings i thought were long gone, and at this point I'm so proud of myself. i didn't achieve anything extraordinary but i CHANGED at that's what is important, i became so open, so warm, i became everyhting a cancer should be, I'm the best me I've ever been, no more lies, no more cowardice, no more hidden agendas, I'm keeping to myself only people that care for me and who i care for, no more toxicity either coming from me nor from others. this cancer season will be full of solitude but a self care type of solitude, I'm going to a festival next week by myself basically and I'm gonna have the best time of my life, I'm going to Spain to do volunteer work for a whole month!!!!!!! im gonna speak spanish, i will meet new people, i will meet new culture, i will bathe myself in mediterranean sun for a whole fucking month, i will sit on the beach, or by the river, im gonna write so much.

this is a promise, I will be happy.