#I was struck my motivation this morning lol

[cq-studios]

Made a little Quiz about Brain, not too hard but I hope y’all enjoy it anyways ^^

[ichijager13]

Pairings : Eren x reader

Raiting: explicit

Modern AU, aged-up characters (late twenties early thirties), memories, drinking to cop, unhealthy coping mechanism, fluff and smut, overstimulation, angst, morning after.

Summary: After being together for years, Eren decides to put an end to your relationship. On his birthday, only one thing can ease your pain and chase away ghosts of happy memories: Alcohol.

A/N: this is a chapter from Remember how it was, a work that I posted on AO3 months ago. I originally intended to post it on Eren’s birthday but I couldn’t wait lol. I hope you enjoy this one.

Also, I would love to thank everyone for the support you are showing me and for reading my work. your reactions warms my heart and motivates me to write more.

Reblogs and reaction are more than welcomed. be happy :*

It popped into your mind before you even open your eyes. It was today and knowing it will be the first time in six years you won’t be by his side for the occasion brought you tears. You stared at the ceiling debating whether you should let your emotions slip or make yourself something strong to numb your feelings. You ended up opting for the safer option.

You were in the kitchen serving yourself your first shot of the day when ghosts of old and happy days captured you.

 It was past midnight, and Eren was still in his study working on a new model. You glanced one more time at your reflection in the mirror then eyed the small cake and the bottle of red wine you held in each hand. You were a little bit stressed about the dress you picked for the matter. It was a bit edgy for you. taking a deep breath, you threw one last look at the tight silky red dress you were in and headed to where Eren was.

 The moment you opened the curtains of the fitting room the girls’ mouths dropped. “Forget about the mini birthday cake, girl, he will devour you instead”. Sasha breathed excitedly. “Right ladies”. She nudged Annie and Mikasa who couldn’t tear their eyes from you.

“Could you spin around?” Annie managed to ask and you did. The dress was a strappy deep v-neck, and the thin straps ran across your naked back. “Girls I’m afraid he will pass out if he sees her like this”. She whispered.

“That’s the point”. Sasha said, enthusiastic. “It’s his birthday”. She pointed.

“Yeah, well I’m afraid it’s going to be his last”. Mikasa finally spoke. “Roy would be struck if I show up in something like this”.

“Armin too”. Annie added.

“Again, that’s the point. To think that I’m the one who’s single”. She groaned. “You’re buying it, and you’ll put your boldest red lipstick on”. Her eyes were shooting daggers. “Come on give the man a treat he’s turning 30. There’s no better way to celebrate it”.

“What do you think?” you glanced at Annie and Mikasa.

“I guess you should give it a try”. Mikasa said unsure. “Right Annie?”

“Yeah, besides you’ve been together for almost three years”. Annie eyed you again before she follows. “It would be nice to break the routine once in a while”.

“That’s what I’m talking about”. Sasha clapped. “Please for once give up your good girl’s dresses. You’ll thank me later”. She turned her attention to the girls. “And you’d better do the same”.

 So here you are facing your lover’s study room door, you inhaled deeply and called his name. no response, you tried again. “Eren?” Hearing his footsteps, your hands started to tremble. It was too late now; you can’t run away.

“Yes, love?” He spoke as he opened the door. “Why didn’t you just come in?” he was in a loose dark blue cotton t-shirt and grey joggers. The moment his eyes landed on you, he froze.

“Happy birthday, my dear”. You chanted smiling but you got no reaction. He didn’t know where to look. Your curly hair looked amazing, your dress hugged your curves perfectly, revealing much more than what it hid, and that red lipstick. He squeezed his eyes shut and massaged them shaking his head. He has been working for hours he must be dreaming. “Honey, are you okay?” you inquired visibly worried. You sat the bottle and stood up reaching a hand to his face. The view offered to Eren when you kneeled made him curse under his breath.

“I’m…”. he looked at your face again. “Fuck”. He growled rubbing the back of his neck eyes roaming your body from head to toe. “Fine, I’m fine… Fuck”. He snitched the cake from your hand, set it on the nearest place he found, and pinned you to the wall kissing you with igniting passion.

While he was devouring your lips you remembered Sasha’s text 15 minutes ago when you sent them a picture of you.

 Sasha

“Daaaaaaamn, Jager boy will keep you up till the sun rises”

“You look A.M.A.Z.I.N.G, love the lipstick”.

Annie

“Yeah, your hair definitely looks amazing”.

Mikasa

“I hope you’re ready for the long night that’s waiting for you”.

Sasha

“Don’t forget to wear sexy perfume”.

Annie

“A body lotion is better don’t you think Sash?”

Mikasa

“I agree”.

 When he finally pulled away resting his head on your shoulder out of breath he spoke. “Damn, you look…”. He cursed once again. “You look sexy, love”. One of his hands rested on your waist. “This dress looks so good on you”. he confessed against your ear; his warm breath rose goosebumps all over your neck. With the other hand, he tilted your head and started ravaging the thin skin of your neck. “And you smell so fucking nice”. He rumbled; voice dangerously husky. Eren was in trance, unable to think straight. he didn’t know where to touch, where to kiss, or what to say. his blood was rushing through his veins and his heart was pounding against his chest. Breathing never felt this hard. when he finally looked back at your face the sight of your ruined lipstick and crimson cheeks made him hard. “You’re so pretty that my heart might stop”.

“I’m glad you liked it”. you mumbled stumbling over your words.

“Liked it? I fucking love it”. you have never heard Eren curse this much.

“Would you like to blow out the candle and cut the cake?” you hazarded looking at your bare feet. You remembered Sasha’s words from earlier.

“I’m staring now at the cake I wanna eat”. He murmured, face inches away from yours before backing away. “But first, let me see the dress”. His eyes traveled along your body. “Can I see the back?” you baited your lower lip. Feeling your hesitation, he added in a soft voice. “Please, love?” you slowly spun. You heard his sharp breath before he brushed your hair away to uncover your bare back. He moved closer and hugged you. “Forget about the cake. tonight, I’m gonna fuck you until you can’t stand straight”. His words traveled all over your body causing your skin’s temperature to rise and your stomach to clench. His hands were caressing your throat and chest while his lips left a trail of love bits along your back. He slipped one of his hands under your dress and pulled your panties down before inserting two digits inside your warm and wet core. Without a word, he continued kissing and sucking at your skin while his thrusts were becoming faster. With each move, your moans became frantic and louder. With a swift movement, he pulled you on his shoulder and headed to his desk. He carelessly moved his plans and pencils and laid your back on top of it. He pressed his fist to his mouth, hungry eyes scanning your body before speaking hastily. “My pretty girl looks magnificent tonight”. His words were followed by another long and passionate kiss. He then kneeled in front of you pushing your dress up. the moment he swept his tongue against your entrance your lungs stopped functioning correctly.

His moves made you feel so dizzy and the only sounds that could leave your parted lips were long and deep moans alongside undistinguished words. “E-Eren”. You moaned grabbing the loose strands that escaped from his bun. He responded with a deep hum that made the coil forming inside you tightens. Feeling the first waves of pleasure crushing on you, you managed to sort out some intelligible words. “I’m close, my love”. The pet name made him double the pressure he was applying to your nub making you lose track of space and time. The only things you were aware of were: his mouth rummaging what was left of your sanity, his warm breath tickling your soft skin and his fingers digging into the fat of your thighs.

Feeling your walls clench around his tongue when you came, he tightened his grip and sucked your juices. When he finally stood up, you were breathing heavily. He snatched the hand covering your eyes, smiling he pecked your lips and cheeks. “This is the best birthday gift ever”. He spoke against your swollen lips. “Too bad I ruined your lipstick; it looked great on you”. and he kissed you again while helping you sit down. Still feeling dazed you buried your head in his chest. Seeing you like this a deep chuckle left his chest. “I’m still not done with you, my love”. A wide smirk displayed on his face as he caressed your sensitive lips with his thumb.

 Feeling the cold liquor overflowing you got back to reality. That was one of your craziest nights with Eren. When you woke up the next morning every muscle felt stiff.

 Feeling the bed beside you empty you propped yourself on your elbow scanning the room. Eren was nowhere to be seen and the perspective of leaving bed in your state made you cringe. You fell back and buried your face in his pillow. You had no idea that a piece of clothing can get such a reaction from him. last night he got you so fucked up that you barely removed your makeup and cleansed before crashing into bed dragging a giggle from your man.

“Did I go too hard on you?” he asked cuddling you. you had no energy; you placed your hands on his before you were down for the count.

You were dozing off when you felt the bed shift next to you. you slowly faced your lover. He brushed his lips against yours. “Good morning, love”.

“Good morning, honey”. A tired smile curved your lips. “Happy birthday dear”.

“Thank you, love”. he brushed your hair off your face smiling. “How do you feel?”

“Like I’ve been to war”. You breathed making him laugh solely.

“I’m sorry”. He let out laying beside you. “But that dress…”. He paused. “The way you looked yesterday standing there it… it drove me crazy”. He caressed your cheek laughing quietly. “I’m sorry I just couldn’t…”. another pause. “Couldn’t stop”. He shifted and covered his eyes. “Never do that again without a warning or else my heart will stop or worst explode”. He sighed deeply. “Talk about a birthday. By the way the cake was delicious thank you, my love”. Seeing you frowning he added. “I put it in the freezer when I woke up and then took a tiny bite”. He propped an arm around your tired figure and pulled you into a light hug smiling against your bare back.

When he left for work you reached for your phone. the girls left a bunch of messages.

Sasha

“Girls, you think she can keep up?” the first message was from Sasha around 2 in the morning

Annie

“She didn’t give a sign since yesterday, I bet they stayed up late”. She replied this morning.

Mikasa

“I mean she looked so hot; the opposite would’ve been weird. Don’t you think”.

Sasha

“I bet her throat is all covered with hickeys”.

Mikasa

“Jealous?”

Sasha

“Kinda”.

Annie

“I guess Saturday launch is canceled”.

Mikasa

“Yeah, I’ll send a message to everyone”.

You unconsciously reached your hand and caressed your throat. You opened your phone’s front camera to inspect it. Sasha was right, he didn’t go easy on your neck and chest. You can already hear your friends’ teasing.

 You laughed when you remembered your friends’ faces when you opened the door.

 “Geez”. Sasha breathed. She opened and closed her mouth several times before she adds. “He went crazy last night”.

“You did the right thing canceling”. Annie spoke to Mikasa.

“It’s Saturday”. You groaned remembering your weekly launch date. “I just woke up”. you massaged your neck.

“So, what are your plans for tonight. Are you still coming with us”. Mikasa asked.

You shook your head. “I’m planning to have full eight hours of sleep”. You said sinking into your living room couch. “Thank you for canceling. And girls make sure you sleep during the day in case you plan on doing such a thing”. You sighed. “What time is it by the way?”

“It’s noon”. Annie answered.

 Taking a sip, you whispered. “Happy birthday Eren”. As tears made their way down your cheeks.

[little-miss-dilf-lover]

THANK YOU SM!! Got me giggling first thing in the morning

YES for Cherry's character, it made sense for her mum to be a handler, that way, she knows all about assassins. At first I wanted her mum to also be an assassin but it wouldn't be as safe as being a handler, plus she won't be home very much and she's protective of who to let babysit her (she's a single mom).

Ok so I can't choose what to send so I'll just list them here and let you decide (if that's okay with you)

Fic: It's Morioka, not Kyoto I talked about it in my one of my last ideas ask. Reader was informed by the WD that the destination is Morioka, not Kyoto like the twins have mentioned. This sparks confusion and they are left to think something else is going on here (+ how they manage to get out without being spotted by WD's men)

Drabble: Honeymoon This one is like the wedding night smut you did, but we're away on a honeymoon, all alone :)

Drabble: Scar Also talked about this one. Tan notices us try not to tear up at the sight of his scar and we end up hugging each other (comfort drabble)

Drabble: Second child How would Tan ask us for a second child

Hcs: Reader who's just like Prince We emotionally manipulate other assassins (like how Prince did with Yuichi. The whole "Do you know how easy it was to get your son to follow me to the rooftop?" We break them and make them become vulnerable because we know their weakness). I know I requested an assassin!reader hc but this focuses more on us (how they're proud of us)

(I know I said 2 drabbles but the second child one came to me after reading your recent dad!tan post) So pick whatever you like, if it's one or two (or none lol) tell me so I can send it in as a request (but really, if you don't like anything from here it's alright !! And also if you do write something but don't feel like writing other one please tell me so I'll know not to send it next time)

— "like if something was to go bad, he’d want to talk to you one last time" WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT 😭😭 (I'm kidding ofc and that's something I can picture him saying but you're breaking my heart here)

AND OMG YES !! I gave it a listen and you're so right that is tan!! Adding it to my playlist of him 💗💗 If you ever come across more songs that makes you think of him please please do share!! (I might as well, I also have a playlist for Lem I'll think of sharing if that's okay) (Will also add some more dad!tan in my next ideas ask as well) 💺 anon

tehe ofc angel!!

yes yes I love that!!! it explains how she knows things, while not being in the job per-say. and how she’d have connections LOVE IT

ooohh okay okay so… firstly love them all, but the ones that are tickling my fancy most is the scar and second child one - they immediately struck up a couple ideas. send in either one or both of them my love, up to you 💓 I usually struggle with ones on the bullet train just bc I get too in my head and it’s like I have to create a movie plot (bc of the order things happen in etc) they use lots of brain power and I often lose motivation for them half way. as much as I love the idea, those ideas don’t like me 😭😭 they kinda kill my brain off. maybe it’s bc I prefer/ find it easier to write civilian readers

AAAAHHH I KNOW I FELT BAD SAYING IT😭 hurt my heart to write it :( but it’s true so had to be said

you added it????? TEHEH😌 and ofc angel, I will do. I’ll keep a note of them and send them like I did with that one. and yes pls do!! and that’s more than okay! I love dad tan so much it’s actually sad atp 😭

[urostakako]

@cursedvibes ty for tagging me ik it was a while ago 😭

20 Questions for Fic Writers

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

on my profile 32, i think? (but actually 35)

2. Whats your total word count?

59,890 tho i do have like 56000 more words in orphaned works

3. What fandoms do you write for?

primarily Jujutsu Kaisen, i had some ideas for other fandoms but those remain as wips... honestly after this tsumiki one im not sure i will be writing for a while siebjfneofneod

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

there's a fire in my brain and im burning up (itadori)

this tired old machine is a-rumbling (higuruma)

the devil's after both of us (itafushi)

oh, lay my curses out to rest (tokyo students + shoko)

oh, ashes ashes dust to dust (nobamaki)

(this makes me upset im not gonna lie cuz looking back and reading these im struck by how mid they are but sjdbdkneodks its whatever)

5. do you respond to comments? why or why not?

i do for the most part !! i love receiving comments and i want people to know how much i appreciate it :) i also love when ppl reply to comments i leave on their fics so i want to do the same

6. what's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

ummm my Curses series was more one-shots without actual plot.. and as many of those were shibuya or post shibuya they were all pretty angsty beifbekdjeodk. i wouldnt say any have this kind of ending because then there would have to be a story. but i would say the saddest one ive written is 'keep running for the sink but the well is dry'

7. what's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

'light of a new morning' for sure. this one actually had some kind of development i would say. also i have bias because this is one of the only three ive written that dont totally suck. though the tsumiki wip im working on for sure will have an even happier ending

8. do you get hate on fic?

im not popular enough for that lol

9. do you write smut?

no

10. do you write crossovers?

i had one in mind a while ago but it escaped me... i never have before but that doesnt mean i never will, even if it is unlikely

11. have you ever had a fic stolen?

i dont think so

12. have you ever had a fic translated?

no but id be honored if so. especially if it was one im proud of

13. have you ever co-written a fic before?

no, but im open to the idea

14. whats your all-time favorite ship?

i go through phases so i cant really answer this lol. my interest waxes and wanes. rn though im really obsessed with uroyuki and in a satosugu phase

15. whats a wip you want to finish but probably won't?

there is a shokohime wip i started two or so years ago about shoko's backstory and the developing of their relationship up until the present but at some point there was a research aspect to it and i thought 'ill do it later'. and then i never did 💀 id like to continue it but i still lowk think it will sit there.. i dont have enough motivation to do research ekdbfkenfkdk

there is also a trigun one i started, it was kind of plotless, just vibes, but i wasnt able to get their dialogue right and idk. maybe when i get into a trigun phase again ill find inspiration and continue

16. what are your writing strengths?

i think im good at describing a scene and emotions. im good at making this kind of poetry

17. what are your writing weaknesses?

im soooo shit at dialogue and even when im not shit at it i keep overthinking it and ruin it anyway lol

18. thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

i mean ive done it (but i orphaned those... lol) and im doing it now for the tsumiki wip so its fine i guess. but id only do it for languages that i know and if not, after profuse grammar checking. also ofc it has to make sense within the context of the story

19. first fandom you wrote for?

septimus heap eiebdkwbdkebd it was so bad

20. favorite fic you've written?

ill do you one better and say three... and these are the not-mid ones

light of a new morning (tsumiki and itadori)

after hours (mob and reigen)

before-the-storm bloom (uroyuki)

my writing style changed a lot and i think these ones emulate the way it is now the best

idk 20 writers but tagging @that-was-anticlimactic @zukkaoru @blackhallow and anyone else who wants !!

[cdreambur]

the faerie au??? fae!wilbur??? shapeshifter!dream finding a pretty boy at an archery range in the middle of the night and flirting only to realize he's the prince of seelie territory??? I'm invested already

I actually love fae aus sooooo much and now there's a snippet of one with dreambur????

really liking the image of prince wilbur going out to practice archery in the middle of the night only for a mysterious foreigner to show up, but instead of extending any formalities or greetings or whatever one may expect when one is royalty, the stranger just starts... flirting.

and then the next morning he gets to find the dream in the crowd and smile as dream begins to panic because he just flirted with the prince

it's so fun!!

— Star :)

i've been reading a bunch of fae aus these past few days and i really wanted to write one for dreambur so when this idea struck i was so happy lol

honestly, i think wilbur goes to the range at night because there is no one around who gives him any special treatment, and when this stranger shows up and flirts with him he just kinda rolls with it since, well, a compliment has never hurt anyone (he also knows that it's gonna be very entertaining later on).

but god, this is such a cute message :') i know it might not seem like much but seeing someone get so excited about my work truly means a lot to me and definitely gives me motivation and courage to continue. so thank you ♡

[whumpacabra]

💗💙🧠🌈🍔?

💗 - What inspired you to start a whump blog?

@whump-galaxy’s prompts :] I had been following a lot of other good whump blogs but their prompts in particular really struck a chord with me.

💙 - How long have you been into whump?

Like most whumpers probably since I was a child - as for this blog, I think it’s been what, about 5 years maybe?

🧠 - What's your favorite type of whumper?

I like my whumpers fleshed out - I need motivations beyond ‘I just like hurting people/you’ to actually have particular feelings on a whumper. I’m a big fan of the cold, calculating, efficient, but oh so human whumper who’s just trying to get results (whatever that may be).

🌈 - Do you prefer Caretaker to be a partner or friend or rival to whumpee?

Friend/platonic partner - preferably one that was a stranger or even an enemy at some point, but definitely a friend by the point the heart of the caretaking takes place. I don’t mind romantically involved caretakers but if done poorly it feels like forced drama and it distracts from the whump.

🍔 - What hour is whump best to enjoy?

I’m a horrible awful morning person who reads whump at 5 AM with my breakfast. Good whump gets me too excited to read before bed lol

[girlvinland]

Today was weird. It started off not great, but sometime during the day I got struck with fic motivation and added four more pages to my second pardoner x morne knight chapter (been feeling a lot of annoyance at myself for putting it off but like. life stuff). I have a bit more to go bc I realized I want Covrin to play a larger role than I initially thought, so I still want to add a scene with him and one to wrap up the chapter. I hope I can do that within the week, and I’m excited to include Cov more. Kind of want to nail down a good friendship for Perci.

A bit after that I wanted to do an arm workout at home but after three sets of my first exercise I was like oh fuck I can’t do this bc tired and weak. Then I realized I was just hungry and had a snack/was able to do the entire thing idk lol :S simple solution. Like I’ve said before, I’ve only been focusing on strength stuff since February so I’m still learning what it requires from me even with eating and everything, and usually it’s more than I expect. And in general it sometimes feels really different to me than something I’ve done in the past like distance running, for instance. That always felt like the main focus was stamina and keeping my energy really steady versus using a lot of energy in shorter bursts. I’ve been trying to track macros better and it’s been sort of useful while also not making me become obsessed with food and it’s helped me discover more foods I like for that. It’s an adventure, but it’s been neat seeing the progress and trying to learn new things.

Last thing is that a friend I haven’t spoken to in a long time texted me asking to video call tomorrow, so that was kind of nice. She used to work under me as a student and now does a lot of archive-related stuff and I’m proud of her. She’s pretty cool and the only person I’ve ever known from North Dakota lol (well, and her family). I’m a little nervous but I think it’ll be nice to catch up.

Lately I’ve been looking back a lot on the past year or so and it’s been a bit eye-opening to see changes in my life now versus last summer. I don’t want to get into it all rn but I feel like things are so vastly different (in a good way for the most part), it makes me feel hopeful sometimes even though there are still waves of grief/anger/etc. Now I just really want a job I like again so I can focus more on moving forward and I hope things will keep falling into place.

Sorry if this was a little all over the place, it was kind of just thinking out loud for a bit.

[snow-in-liyue]

Diluc x GN!Reader

Just a short kinda silly period comfort fic I wrote a while ago and never posted, I found myself wishing I had a pyro vision to help with cramps and this is what came of it, basically you just use Diluc as a heating pad lol. I haven’t written a fic since my Deviantart days ha yikes, so hope it’s decent at least.

TW - Periods

------------------------

Dawn Winery was quiet at night. Workers were always sent home before the sun could set leaving only you and your husband to occupy the estate until morning. It was late; far too late in the night to be awake but you had woken up in pain over an hour ago and could not fall back asleep. You tried to keep your restless movements to a minimum to avoid waking up Diluc, who was sleeping peacefully next to you, his arm below him was tucked under his pillow and his breathing was steady and slow. 

After only a few minutes the position you were in became uncomfortable so you opted to try laying on your back again. Your cramps weren’t usually this painful and persistent and normally if you had trouble falling back asleep you would go downstairs to make yourself some tea but tonight you couldn’t risk it. This past week had been especially stressful on your husband who had been working tirelessly to close a deal to begin exporting wine to Inazuma since the storm around the nation had settled. Although not known to be a light sleeper, Diluc was always more sensitive to your own presence and would undoubtedly wake up when he sensed that the bed was missing your warmth.

And thus, you were content sacrificing your own sleep… that is, until an idea struck you. This could work if you moved slowly, you were sure of it. You turned slightly to gaze upon his handsome features to look for any signs of him waking up before putting your plan into motion. Carefully, you sat up and stretched your arm as far as it could reach over to his nightstand, you fumbled around the very edge before your fingers grazed the warm metal of his pyro vision. Step 1 success!

With the object now in your grasp, you settled back down in bed and checked on Diluc once again. His breathing was still slow, features still relaxed, and hardly a single strand of bright red hair had moved since you last checked. Now, feeling more motivated and slightly mischievous, you began step 2. With a deep breath you slowly wrapped your hand against the thickness of his available wrist that was laying between your body and his. You took only one more moment to look back over at him and then lifted his hand into the air and gently settled it on top of your lower stomach. 

You nearly jumped when he suddenly let out a deep sigh at the contact but thankfully he had remained asleep. You took a minute to let your now racing heart settle, you were so close, soon you’d be fast asleep with your husband once again. Determined to complete your task you resumed to step 3 and slowly bunched up your night shirt bit-by-bit to let his hand be guided directly onto your skin. The cold of his matching silver wedding band was a stark contrast to his natural warmth as it rested on your skin, finally unhindered by fabric. Due to his possession of a pyro vision, he always ran unnaturally warm compared to the average visionless individual. A welcome blessing for you who, despite not possessing a vision, often found yourself cold more often than not. You count yourself lucky for happening to fall in love with a pyro vision user, although you would often joke the opposite to him during Mondstadt’s summers when he, in turn, sought out your coolness, much to your dismay. 

The heat radiating from his large hand was able to soothe your cramps slightly but it was still not enough to fall back asleep. Thankfully, you already expected such a result and had a backup plan waiting. You grabbed his vision from where you set it down on the bed and gave it a gentle tap hoping to bring forth more of its power while your husband was still unconscious. Nothing had changed that you could detect. You weren’t exactly sure it would even work in the first place but you had become desperate with lack of sleep and decided to try again with a few more gentle taps to the surface of the flame within. Oh! Did it actually work? You thought you felt a slight shift in temperature so you studied the vision and once more gave it a tap. You were so focused on trying to sense a reaction that you failed to notice your husband sleepily open his eyes to assess the situation around him. 

You were lying on your back with his hand sprawled out on the soft skin of your stomach. Your tired eyes were already developing dark circles and your brows were knitted in concentration as you inspected his vision in your hands. Truly an odd sight to wake up to but Diluc was thankful that there was no danger. When he felt a slight tug of his vision wake him up he worried that it sensed something was wrong as it often did when you left him alone in bed or experienced a nightmare.

Your whole body tensed and you nearly jumped out of your skin when he finally spoke, voice raspy from sleep, “Is everything ok dear?” 

“‘Luc! Don’t scare me like that!” You huff in embarrassment at being caught but calm down quickly when his worried scarlet eyes lock with yours. You frown and turn away, embarrassment now melting into guilt, “I’m sorry, I was trying so hard not to wake you, I know you were really tired.” 

“Hey, come now, it’s alright,” he sat up and moved positions so that he could cup your chin and turn you to face him again, his words would be considered ‘uncharacteristically soft’ to anyone other than you. Unlike the rest of Mondstandt, you got to see the other side of the famed wine industry tycoon. While to everyone else he spoke rather blunt and monotone, to you he always spoke gentle and from the heart. Of course it wasn’t always that way, when you first met Diluc he treated you the same as everyone else, not rude by any means, just at arms length. It took some time but with mutual attraction and your stubborn persistence you were able to gain his trust and eventual love. 

Tears welled up in your eyes but you refused to let them fall, you know the situation is a bit ridiculous to be crying over but your emotions were stretched thin at the moment from both hormones and sleep deprivation. 

Now sensing that the situation was more delicate than he originally thought, Diluc proceeded to wrap his strong arms around your body in a protective hold. One arm cupped under the back of your knees and the other snaked around your back to hold your waist leaving you to lean on his large chest. He kissed your temple before speaking up again, “Shh it’s alright, it’s ok, can you tell me what happened? Why are you up so late?” 

Before responding you took a moment to curl into his embrace and take in his comforting, masculine scent. “I’m sorry, I woke up in pain from cramps and couldn’t get back to sleep… I didn’t want to wake you, you’ve been so stressed this week and you deserved a good night's sleep,” You mumbled into his shirt. 

He let out a light chuckle at this, “Thank you (Y/N), but how could I possibly get a good night’s sleep if my partner is in distress? Wake me up whenever you can’t sleep, I promise I don’t mind.” With one piece of the puzzle still missing, he eyed the object now discarded to the side of the bed before facing you again, “And my vision…?”

Embarrassment took over you once again, “Ah! W-well…” A blush took over your cheeks as you continued to stutter over your words for a second, your husband cocked his head in amusement. Adorable, he thought. You covered your face with your hands for a second and took a deep breath, “I thought that… Since your vision makes you naturally warmer… that I could use you as…um…” You trailed off, not wanting to continue for a moment, you could see the knowing smirk on his face grow.

Although clearly knowing where you were going with this, he decided to tease you further so he lightly increased the temperature on his hands where they met your skin,  “As?”

You gasp at the contact, in the past you sometimes found yourself wondering how Diluc and Kaeya were raised together and yet could be so opposite in personality but now you know; they were both borderline sadistic in their teasing. The only difference being Kaeya was a tease to everyone openly while Diluc only teased those close to him, which at the moment meant only you…

“A-as a…” You lowered your voice to a whisper and buried your face into his chest in hopes that he wouldn't hear you, “A heating pad…” 

You should have known he wouldn’t let you get away with that so easily, “Sorry dear I didn’t quite catch that, could you speak up?” 

You groan, realizing you’ll have to just accept your fate, “As a heating pad! I thought… I thought I could tap your vision to make your hand warmer ok? Don’t tease me!” His chest rumbled in laughter at your story but you kept your face hidden against him and whined out his name. 

“I wouldn’t tease you if you didn’t make such cute expressions you know,” He tapped your nose playfully before continuing, “It wasn’t a bad idea actually.” The previously removed hand left your legs to trail up your smooth skin and found purchase on your lower stomach once again. “But I much prefer knowing that I’m the one taking care of you.” The last sentence was spoken in a deep, intimate tone that tickled your ear causing a shiver to run up your spine; a contrast to your husband's steadily warming hand. 

Before you could begin to think of a reply your body was lowered back onto the cool silk sheets of your shared bed and a blanket was pulled over you. Diluc laid on his side facing you so that his palm could stay protectively over your soft skin. You could tell he wasn’t going to last much longer, his eyes drooped down but his stubbornness refused to give in to sleep until he knew you were taken care of first. Warmth soaked into your body beginning to dull the pain you felt. Sleep was finally creeping up on you, coaxed out by the warmth of your husband's body and the safety of being in his arms. Your breathing began to slow and right before you drifted off completely you felt the soft pressure of lips on your temple and a whispered “I love you.”

[supraveng]

Marvelous Friends part 1

Summary:  You join your best friend at a party, and meet the man of your dreams?

Characters: Reader, Benedict Cumberbatch x Sophie Hunter, RDJ x Susan Downey, Sebastian Stan, Chris Evans

Warnings: cursing, reader in over her head, bad writing...

“Oh, for fuck’s sake Aaron, you are supposed to be preventing these things, not causing them“ you scream into your cell phone so agitated by this whole thing that you aren’t even aware that there are people watching you from the window.

You stepped outside trying to not cause a scene or god forbid have Sophie’s kids hear you and repeat anything you might say.  You finally hang up and throw your phone across the lawn as Benedict comes out the door to check on you. 

“Everything ok dear?” he approaches you with a smirk knowing full well that you are irritated beyond rational conversation.  “Can I get you anything?” he asks.  Turning to face him now that you’ve taken a few deep breaths, 

“I think I need a new manager, got any good ones lying around?” you reply.  

“Holy Shit!  That was your manager!  I just thought your husband  was in the doghouse!  Hi, I’m Robert” he sticks out his hand and you shake it, thankfully you are still too riled up to get star struck and make a fool of yourself.  

“Hi, sorry, I didn’t intend to be that loud, but that man is an absolute jackass!  I’m Y/N” you respond as you blow out some air and try to calm down.   

“Y/N darling, you need a drink, let me make you a martini” 

“No, Benny, I’m your babysitter tonight and you know one martini turns into 5” you smirk as you follow  the two of them back into the house.  

Sophie is coming down the stairs and her smile disappears when she sees your red face and Benedict heading toward the kitchen. “Y/N, what happened?  Are you ok?” she asks, her voice thick with worry.  

“Oh Phie, I’m fine, Aaron is just trying my patience and I couldn’t stay quiet” you smile as she wraps you in a hug, then busts out laughing.  

“Well, that’s a long time coming, I’m not sure how you have worked with him this long without bloodshed” she quips as Benedict hands you a cup of tea.  

“I’m not that bad to work with, I just don’t like my personal life to be used without my permission. Ugh, I just don’t have the energy for him today, I wanted to come and have fun with Kit, Hal & Finn” you whine as you sip your tea “but apparently the drama pays off because this is the best cup of tea Benny has ever made for me, thank you” you reach up and peck his cheek “I’m feeling better already.” 

“Good, because the boys have a list of fun for you tonight and they are extremely excited.” Sophie responds “Oh, and this is Susan, Robert’s wife”  

“It’s nice to meet you, now you all go on and have a lovely dinner and don’t worry about us” you smile to the couples as you head upstairs to check on the kids. 

Three hours later the two couples walk back into the house to find you frantically typing on your laptop at the breakfast bar in the kitchen, with a cold cup of tea next to you.  You jump when you hear someone clear their throat, not realizing they had come in and were all staring at you.  

“What? Why are you all staring at me?” you ask.  

Sophie shakes her head and giggles at you “we asked if you wanted to join us for a drink, apparently you are very focused on your work and didn’t even hear us come in.”   

“Sorry, I was planning my wedding” you reply with a smirk “Kit proposed again, actually, I’m not sure this was a proposal, it was more or less a list of reasons why my previous decline is not being accepted.  Apparently, age is just a number and I can move to England right away, so the wedding is next week” you explain as you follow the others over to the bar.   

Benedict turned around with a guilty look on his face, “what did you do?” his wife asks with a pointed glare.   “I was reassuring our son that if he liked someone and made his intentions known then any girl would be lucky to have him, but in my defense, I thought he was talking about that little girl down the street, Madison.   They were playing yesterday and he seemed smitten, so when he mentioned his love living in the US and not in England…..I was trying to help” he huffed out as he started pouring the drinks.   

You all start laughing and realize that since it’s Benedict’s fault, he will have to break it to Kit that you will not be marrying him next week.  “Why do I have to be the bad guy here?  It was an accident!” Ben protests “and why didn’t you just tell him you have a boyfriend already and can’t marry him?”  

“Because I would never lie to Kit” you respond, sipping your martini.   “I haven't really met anyone since I moved back from Vancouver, a few dates here or there but no one to write home about" you say with a shrug  “Well, in that case, can I give you away at the wedding?”  Robert asks and thankfully lightens the mood.  It was another two hours of drinking and laughing with your oldest and newest friends before you all decide to call it a night.   

“Y/N, Robert and I are having friends over to our place on Sunday, we would love for you to be there” Susan states as they are heading toward the door.  “That’s so sweet, thank you, I’ll just tag along as an extra Cumberbatch” you tell her as you hug her goodbye. 

You wake the next morning and know that you have a ton of work to do and 0 motivation.   Deciding to distract yourself as best you can, you text Sophie about the party at Susan & Robert’s.

So what kind of party is this thing tomorrow?

Phie: They usually have 30 or so people, tons of food, drinks, but very laid back.  I think you will like it 

That’s reassuring, the last thing I need is to make a fool out of myself in front of Ben’s celebrity friends

Phie: Oh, there will definitely be celebs there, but honestly I have no idea who, most likely a bunch of the Marvel crew, those who are in town anyway….but don’t stress, they are all  mostly normal people, lol

Well, I’m going to work on some writing and then maybe try to find something nice to wear to the party, I might make a fool of myself, but I need to look like I have my act together

Phie: Send me pics, I’ll help you decide….btw Ben has been questioning me on your dating habits, I have a funny feeling that he might try to set you up...

Well, that sounds dreadful,  I love your husband but what is his track record for match making?

Phie: I don't think he's actually ever tried to set anyone up before

Fantastic, I'm the guinea pig 🙄

 Ok, what do you think of these, I don’t want to be overdressed or look like I’m homeless

Phie: I love them both, but how about you were the short one & I borrow the blue one?  

That is a great idea!  I’ll be there a bit early so we can get ready together.  Who is staying home with the boys?

Phie: Actually, day time parties with the Downey’s usually includes the kids, so they will be joining us

Time for the party came earlier than you had anticipated as you pulled up to Phie’s house, Kit came running out the door with a big smile on his face.  Crouching down you scooped him into a hug and kissed his cheek.  

“Well aren’t you in a good mood today, handsome?” asking as you set him back down.  He grabbed your hand and began dragging you back to the house. 

 “Mum told me we can’t get married next week, but I can still love you for the rest of my life, isn’t that great!” he exclaimed as you walked in the front door.  

“That is the best thing I’ve heard all week!  And I get to love you for the rest of my life too” you reply watching the realization hit him and his smile get even bigger and run off to tell everyone the good news.  Before you could do anything, you went back out to your car and grabbed your bags and then headed up to Phie’s bedroom to get ready.  

“There you are, I was beginning to worry” she said as she pecked your cheek and gave you a hug, then handed you a glass.  

“Did you start day drinking without me?” you inquire as you sip on the merlot with a smile on your face.  

“I just opened the bottle for us to enjoy while we get ready.  I spoke with Kit and the wedding is off but he understands and all is well.  Benedict tried and, just made everything messier” she responded while pulling the blue dress from the garment bag.  

“You did a fantastic job, he gave me the biggest hug and seems very happy that we will not be getting married” you giggle as you move around her room figuring out the best place to put your things.  

“I think he’ll be more upset about you taking off next week than anything, that’s why I’m not planning on telling him until after you’ve gone.  He has grown really attached to you” she smirks as she’s slipping the dress on.�� 

Before you realize it, the wine bottle is empty and Ben is knocking on the door.

“You two look amazing as always, but the car is here, so we need to head out.  Can you bring Kit down with you while I go down and get Hal & Finn seated in the car?” he asks as Kit comes in and gasps looking up at his mom.   

“Mum, you look like a princess” he hugs her legs and looks up at her lovingly. 

 “Thank you love, you look very handsome.  Are you ready to go? Do you have your bag?” she asks while rubbing his back.  

“Oh, I need to get that, and can I give Y/N her present now?”  You look over a bit confused 

“oh Kit, you didn’t have to get me a gift” you tell him as he gives you a hug.   

“But it’s important to show the people you love how special they are, I’ll be right back” he states as he heads back downstairs.  You look at Sophie confused and she just smirks at you as both follow him down to the kitchen.   He holds up a cupcake with a huge grin on his face.  

“This is for you, because you are as sweet as a cupcake.  And that’s a ring you can wear to remind you that you are wonderful when I’m not here to tell you.” 

 You feel like you are about to cry, it was by far the most sincere and thoughtful thing you have ever heard.  “Thank you!  I love it & I love you!” you told him as you kissed his forehead and put the ring on.  

“Alright, let’s get going Kit, dad and your brothers are in the car waiting for us!” Sophie grabbed his hand and laced your arm with hers as she ushered you all out the door. 

Stepping out of the car at the Downey’s house you started walking towards the door when Kit came up and grabbed your hand.  

“Can I be your date tonight?” he asked with a shy grin.  

“Absolutely!  There’s no one else I would want to accompany me tonight.”  

Ben turns to you, holding Hal & Finn “remember Kit, the kids are going to be playing upstairs, but you can join us when you get hungry, alright?”  

“Yes, dad, but Y/N is still my girl” he stated proudly as you walked through the door.  

“That’s right Ben, I’m Kit’s girl!” you lean down and kiss the top of his head just before he heads up the stairs with his dad.  Sophie grabbed your arm and the two of you headed further into the house.  

Robert spotted you almost immediately and came over hugging you both “where is the fiance? Are all the details in place for the ceremony?  I’m still walking you down the aisle right?”  

“Hi Robert, I’m sorry but the ceremony has been cancelled.   Sophie was able to talk some sense into Kit since Benny was useless” you reply.  

“I heard that!” Ben remarks as he’s coming into the room.   “And in my defense, I’m not useless, just not very good at telling my son no.”  

“It’s alright dahling, you tried your best.” Sophie tried to console Benedict who seemed to take your statement to heart.  

“Well, I’m glad you made it, can I get you a drink?” Susan asked as an attempt to move on to a more neutral conversation.   

“Yes, please” you replied happily as you followed her to the bar.  

“Y/N? Y/N L/N?  Holy Shit!”  You heard from the doorway to the next room, where most of the party goers had already gathered.  You turned and was shocked 

“Seb?  Holy Shit!  How are you?” you asked as you moved over to hug him.  “It’s been so long, I’m surprised you recognized me.”  

“I’m good” he responded “and yea, it’s been like...10 years? And you look great, haven’t aged a bit!”  

You laughed at his response “that is an absolute lie, but I will take the compliment anyway.” you giggle at him.  He was always such a nice guy to work with and genuinely considerate to everyone on set.  His charming personality always made you smile. 

“This is so great running into you, I saw your interview on Good Day LA last week.  You are doing so great!” he said with a huge smile.  

“Oh thanks, but I think that may have been the worst interview in the history of television.   I was honestly hoping no one saw it” you cringed rethinking how quickly the questions had gone off the rails.  You are a writer, becoming more well known over the past decade so interviews were becoming more common for you, but that one felt more like a Twilight Zone episode.  

“Well, it was a bit crazy, but you handled a lot better than most people would.  I was impressed” he grinned as he took a sip of his beer.  

“Thanks, I appreciate that, and my whole deer in headlights reaction.” you commented as you took the drink Susan offered.  

“Hey, I didn’t know you knew each other?” you heard Robert say as he came up from behind you “and what happened in the interview?”  

“Yea, I was writing for Gossip Girl, back when Seb was on and he was constantly teasing me for being cold” you reminded him with a smirk.  

“New York in fall is beautiful, not cold! You are crazy!” he responds as he starts laughing at me.  

“And the interview was a shit show that I barely made it out alive” you state with a roll of your eyes.  

“That’s not true, you put that woman in her place and didn’t seem fazed by her ridiculous questions at all” he told me.  

“What the hell happened?” Robert seemed more interested than I thought he would 

“we were talking about my new book and the book tour coming up, then all of a sudden she’s asking me about my ex” I responded as I shrugged my shoulders.  Sebastian looked at me “then, the woman asks if she’s seeing anyone now, and your response was priceless, I might steal it if you don’t mind”  he states as he’s laughing remembering the interview.  

“Y/N, dear, what did you say?” Robert asks with a smirk.  

“I asked her ‘why? Are you shooting your shot?” as you start laughing too, realizing that you probably couldn’t have planned it if you tried.  At this point you realize there are more of the Marvel friends standing around listening to your conversation and you don’t even care.   

Your first drink is kicking in and it’s not like you are ever going to see these people again. “Honestly, I don’t know why she even mentioned my ex, nobody cares who I’m dating, I’m a writer”  

“Yes, but when us writers date high profile celebrities, people want to know” Sophie reminds you as she puts her arm around you.  

“Oh Phie, high profile is a bit of a stretch doncha think? But you are always my voice of reason, this is why I love you!” you say as you kiss her cheek.  Looking around the room you wonder if there’s anyone else here you know, when you see Chris Evans on the other side of the room.  

Benedict immediately follows your line of sight and smirks before taking your empty glass.  “I think you need a refill, here allow me, why don't you and Sophie go find a place to chat.”  

His wife shakes her head and gives you a small sympathetic smile before sending him back for refills.  Sophie drags you further into the room and finds a spot to sit that gives you a better view of Mr. Evans.  

“I didn’t realize you knew Sebastian” she said as she sat.  

“Yea, we worked together when I was living in NY, that was 10 or 12 years ago.  I didn’t know you knew him” you respond.  She looks at you questioningly, then shakes her head.  

“All the Marvel people know each other, you still haven’t watched the movies, have you?”  

“Um, I haven’t seen all of them, there are a lot, but I did watch Doctor Weirdo, and Benny was very good!” you respond quite proud of yourself.  

“Bloody hell!  It’s Doctor Strange, we’ve had this discussion before” Ben states as he hands you your fresh drink.  

“Ok, I’m sorry.  Doctor Strange, although I don’t think that’s much better than Doctor Weirdo.  And in my defense, your facial hair in the movie gave me nightmares'' you say as you sip on your drink. 

“Anyway, did the ex contact you after the interview?  I’m just curious?” Ben asks, rolling his eyes at you.  

You scrunch up your nose at the question “no, why would he? I haven’t spoken to him in the last four years. And honestly I'm sure he deleted my number.  Can we talk about anyone else?"  

"Yes, what's the schedule on the book tour? How long will you be gone?" Sophie acts trying to defuse the irritation in your voice with the mention of your ex.  

You can tell by the way she's glancing at her husband that she's trying to figure out why he brought up your ex knowing full well that if he had contacted you, she would have been the first one to know about it.. 

"Oh I'm flying out next Sunday, heading for NYC, then I'll be in Boston for 2 days, then a day In Philly, a day in Baltimore and I'm not 100% of the cities after that, other than ending up the following week in Miami so I can be with the family for spring break" you mention to them. 

"Did I hear you say you are only going to Boston for 2 days, that's not nearly long enough" you hear a deep voice state as you look up and see Chris Evan's standing next to Seb and walking closer to you.  

Holding out his hand "I'm Chris, I don't think we've met" he states.  

You plaster the most sincere smile you can on your face in hopes of not drooling at the sight of him, shaking his hand "I'm Y/N, and yes, this tour is only 2 days in Boston, but I lived there for 5 years so I’ve seen quite a bit already” you respond.

“Huh?  For someone who’s cold all the time, you seem to wind up in colder climates” Seb laughs at you.  “Shut up! You are the worst!” you respond with a laugh.  

“It’s true though, darling.  And you always call me to complain about it!” Sophie responds with a smirk.  

“OK, in my defense, Boston was a needed escape from my family, whom I love dearly but can be quite suffocating at times.  Then Chicago was my first real job after graduation and I couldn’t pass that up!  And as my best friend, Phie, you are required to listen to all my complaining, regardless of the topic” you state matter of factly.  

“And last year in Vancouver, that was the worst yet, she would send me photos of eyelashes with ice crystals on them” Sophie laughs remembering your first winter in Canada and how miserable you were.  

“That was awful and you and Benny both ridiculed me, I’m still emotionally scared”  

“So, you don’t like the cold but keep torturing yourself?” Chris asks with a smirk.  

“It appears I do, but it’s always for good reason. Chicago was an opportunity I couldn’t resist, if I had taken that job, I probably wouldn't have published my first novel” you explain with fondness.  

“That’s not true, Y/N.  Your first novel was incredible and it would have been published eventually”  Ben states as he takes your empty glass.  

“Benedict has read my book?” you asked Sophie completely shocked.  

“He has read all of your novels, but I think the first 3 was trying to find juicy gossip on how we met or something to try and blackmail you later, I’m not quite sure” she responds with a shrug.   

“Hold on” Seb interjects “your book, Searching for more, is about Sophie?” 

“Yes, and no” you respond “the adventure that Annabell has is loosely based on my summer after high school before moving to Boston.  And her new found friend, Fiona, is Sophie to a T!  And I’m also shocked that you’ve read it” you eyed him suspiciously.  

“Ok, so you really married a French man when you were 18 and brought him back with you?”  Seb asks, completely disregarding that you questioned him about reading the book.  How did your day turn out like this?  This was the most surreal moment you have had in a long time.  

“No, he wasn’t French, he was Belgian!” Benedict responds as he comes back in with refills.  You start laughing when you see the way Chris and Seb are staring at you wide eyed.   

“Oh my gosh!  No, I didn’t get married when I was 18.  And Benny, you weren't there, you don’t know anything” shaking your head.  “Annabelle’s story is loosely based on events that occurred, we didn’t get married…..and he was Swiss, I think.” you snicker when you look over at Sophie for confirmation, she shrugs and takes a drink.    

The five of you continue to chat for another hour or so when you feel a tap on your shoulder.  You turn to see Kit smiling at you with a cup in his hand “I missed you” he states as he climbs up into your lap and hugs you around your neck.  

“I missed you too little man, do anything fun while you were upstairs?” you asked as he made himself more comfortable.  

“I didn’t know you had a kid” Seb says as you are trying to balance the 5 year old in your lap with your drink in your hand.  

Kit looks up at him “she’s not my mum, she’s my girl!  That’s my mum” he states as he points to Sophie.  

“Oh, well, it’s nice to meet you, I’m Seb, this is my friend Chris.  What’s your name?”  he asks while Kit plops himself in the middle of the group as though he should have been there all along.  

“I’m Kit” he states as he extends his hand to both Chris and Sebastian.  

“So, she’s your girl, huh?” Chris asks with a smirk “is it serious?”  

“Very!  He gave me a ring today, see.” showing Chris your right hand and the Wonder Woman ring. 

“Wait a minute, the wedding is cancelled, but you still gave her a ring? I’m not sure that’s how it works buddy”  Robert kneels down talking to Kit.  

“it’s ok, I get to love her forever and we can get married when I’m 30!” Kit explains as he rushes off to join the other kids.  

You all turn and look at Sophie “I thought you fixed it Phie!  You’ve just given him a deadline!" you gasp. 

She smiles at you with a guilty look on her face "I think you might need to grab a bite to eat before you have another drink. And honestly, I'm sure he will forget all about this in a few months. Besides, I won't let my 30 year old son marry some 60 something year old hag that's after him for his money!" she states as seriously as possible. 

You deadpan "thanks for that. I need a new best friend" you roll your eyes and head towards the food. 

"Well, I didn't see that coming" Robert chuckles as he watches the two of you walk out of the room. 

"That actually went better than I expected" Ben responds and shakes his head, "those two are worse than siblings." 

A/N: I had an idea of who the ex is, but I may just leave it open for interpretation, he does come into the story later, but can remain faceless

[hanoella]

Affettuoso- With Feeling (Part 3)

Pairing: Bucky x Pianist!Reader

Set after the events of TFATWS: In an effort to start over and make a home in Louisiana, Bucky meets a friend of Sam’s who ends up being his landlord. With only a driveway to separate them, he finds that he’s not the only one looking for a fresh start.

Series tags/warnings: Slow Burn, Eventual Bucky x Reader, Mentions of Domestic Abuse, Canon Level Violence

Part 3 Word Count: 3k

A/N: Can you tell I don't really have a posting schedule? lol. I also introduced links to the specific pieces I had in mind. I'm using soundcloud because I don't think everyone has access to spotify. Trying to be reader friendly! This can be read with or without the audio, as I do my best to still convey the thought in the fic. Though if you can, I highly recommend :)

Thanks again for all your support! Every heart and comment motivates me and is just so wonderful

Read Part 1; Masterlist

---

A few days had passed since the night that Bucky had overheard your troubles. It had been quiet since, and you hadn’t left the house. The curtains were opened during the day and closed at night, the only telltale signs that you existed.

Doesn’t she have to work? Bucky thought to himself. He speculated all the different possibilities as he used the riding mower around the property. Maybe you were an heiress? You seemed pretty down to earth though. Or maybe you sold a patented idea for a ton of money. All this land had to have been expensive. And to not request actual money from him?

He eyed up the width of the gate for your fence. The riding mower couldn’t fit so he would have to use a push mower for your fenced off yard. He hadn’t seen one in the garage. Maybe the old shed at the back of your yard had one? Bucky parked the mower in the garage, taking a moment to make a mental list of everything. Depending on if he found anything in the shed, he might need to buy a few basic tools and a chainsaw for that fallen tree.

He walked out of the garage and over to the shed. The leaves were changing color and it brought a whole new atmosphere to the secluded forest area. Opening the gate of the weathered white fence, he looked around to see if you were out. No signs of life. Entering the yard and closing the gate behind him, he started walking to the back. Halfway through, he stopped at the fire pit. The grey stone blocks were starting to crumble, with a few of the bricks having fallen off. It would probably be really nice if he got a little bit of cement mix and filled in the gaps. Bucky made another mental note.

The shed had no padlock so he was able to open it with no problem. Amongst the cobwebs and bags of soil, was an older green push mower that looked like it might work. He gave the gas a pull and got no response back. Looking underneath, Bucky saw what might be the problem. He’d have to take a closer look later. Putting the lawn mower back onto its wheels, he pushed it across the yard, pausing when he saw movement though the glass doors of the back patio.

Craning his neck to avoid the glare, he saw you sitting at your fancy full keyboard. The way the piano was against the opposite wall, your back was to him. You had big over-ear headphones plugged into it, so he couldn’t hear the sound but he saw the flurry of keys being pressed down. Whatever you were playing, you played passionately. Hands and arms gracefully moved despite the speed at which they were moving. Enhanced hearing coming into play, he heard the muffled clicks of the fluttering keys. Suddenly, you pressed down forcefully, holding whatever chord you had struck as your shoulders gently relaxed. A deep breath. Arm creating a graceful arc as if you had studied ballet, you pressed gently on another chord. And another. Bucky counted three more times you did this before you let your hands gently fall from the keys to your lap. Several moments passed before slid the headphones off of your ears to sit wrapped around your neck. Another deep breath. This time as the breath escaped you, you stayed slouched, head tilting up to stare at nothing on the wall.

A buzz broke Bucky from his trance.

“Call me, new mission” The text from Sam on his home screen said.

He pocketed his phone, glancing through the glass one more time. There you still sat.

Unmoving.

---

The roar of the plane’s engine was just loud enough to drown out Bucky’s thoughts without being annoying. If it weren’t for the adrenaline of the recovery mission under the cover of nightfall, he probably would’ve been lulled to sleep. Beside him sat Sam, looking on his phone for the exact coordinates of the politician they had been sent to rescue.

“Here it is. I’m assuming there’s some sort of underground base since there are no heat signatures anywhere within the radius where he was taken. It should take us about ten more minutes before we’re directly over it.”

Bucky hummed in acknowledgement.

Sam raised an eyebrow. “Earth to Bucky.”

“What does your friend do?” Bucky asked suddenly, sitting up straighter and turning towards him.

“… What?”

“What does she do? I’ve never seen her leave the house. Is she okay?”

“If you’re asking why she doesn’t leave the house, it’s because her contract doesn’t start for a while. She’s technically still supposed to be in physical therapy but she hasn’t found a place yet. You know, your whole routine gets messed up when you move.”

“For her shoulder?”

Now it was Sam’s turn to look at Bucky, trying to decipher the motive behind these questions. Bucky shifted his weight in the chair, antsy under the scrutiny.

“Never mind, I-”

“Yes, for her shoulder.” Sam said, cutting him off. He stopped himself from asking why Bucky wanted to know. There was an awkward pause before Bucky explained himself.

“I just wanted to know. I’m not used to seeing people so…”

“Similar to yourself?”

“I was gonna say isolated but fair point.” Bucky admitted. Sam leaned back in his chair, looking straight forward.

“She’s been through a lot… I know you heard some of it.”

Bucky blinked in surprise.

“I realized the window was open when I could hear you drive off.”

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to-”

“It’s alright, it’s good that you know.” Sam said as he held up his hand to cut Bucky off.

“She’s just trying to get a fresh start. She’s in a raw emotional space and in the meantime is a little skittish. Just like someone else I know.” Sam jabbed his elbow into Bucky’s side as he enunciated the last sentence.

“Okay, okay, I get it. I’m trying!” He shouted as he held one hand up defensively and using the other to block the second jab Sam was trying to get in. Sam chuckled and then stood up, grabbing a parachute pack and tossing it at Bucky, who caught it without even looking.

“Figured you might wanna try an actual chute this time.”

Bucky rolled his eyes and mouthed Sam’s words mockingly with a grimace as he put the backpack on. Clipping it into place, he joined Sam at the side door of the plane.

“She used to play in an orchestra you know.” Sam said wistfully. “The piano. That’s actually how we met. She had volunteered to play a small concert before the dinner. It really helped raise a lot of money for the VA.”

Bucky stayed silent, prompting him to continue.

“Then that bastard she was engaged to beat her and then shoved her down a set of concrete steps when she tried to leave him. It was like a month after we all came back. She was in the hospital for a while. Broken ribs, broken shoulder, and a nasty concussion to boot. Neighbor saw the whole thing and called the cops but the courts were so backed up and the case fell through the cracks. Wouldn’t leave her alone after he got out. So, I pulled some strings and helped her move down here on the fly.”

“… That’s terrible.”

Bucky didn’t know what to say or how to react. They stood in silence, taking a moment to pay a respect of sorts to the trials you have been through. Then Sam broke the silence.

“She just needs time to heal in more ways than one. But she’s strong. Resilient.”

Putting a hand on Bucky’s shoulder, he squeezed it lightly with reassurance.

“Reminds me of someone else I know.” Sam said, finishing the conversation and pulling his goggles over his eyes, giving Bucky the opportunity to take the compliment without feeling too on the spot.

Pulling the door open, Sam shouted over the wind.

“Ready?”

Bucky nodded. Sam jumped from the plane and deployed the wings, the shield shining in the moonlight. Bucky jumped right behind him, using the glint of the silver star to guide his descent as he followed the man that gave the shield its meaning.

---

You laid with your head down on the kitchen table, letting the last golden rays of sun warm the side of your face. You were exhausted from going to physical therapy, especially since today had been the first appointment. All the measurements, all the exercises, all the stretching.

All the questions.

“So, how did you break your shoulder?” the young blonde physical therapist asked.

“Ah, I… fell down some stairs.” You said, looking down at your hands in your lap.

She didn’t look up from the papers, instead just raising an eyebrow.

“You also cracked some ribs and had a concussion?”

“… They were concrete.”

She looked up from the papers at you, analyzing. Her gaze softened and she asked no further questions on how these serious injuries had been obtained.

“Let’s look at your range of motion.”

You had practically stumbled into the house, kicking off your sneakers and plopping down at the kitchen table. Minutes passed by as you regained your breath, heartbeat steadying. The house was slightly cold since you had turned the heat down this morning. As your sweat cooled, you wrapped your arms around your legs in an attempt to keep you warm without getting up.

The sun feels so warm… You thought to yourself drowsily, feeling slightly less lonely. The sun was a cheap substitute for the warmth of a partner…

---

You jolted upright, the kitchen dark and cold. Neck and shoulder stiff from the awkward position you had dozed off in. Feeling the dryness of your mouth, you got up, stretching your neck gently while you walked to the fridge to get water. Chugging about half the bottle, you squinted at the clock. You had been asleep for about forty-five minutes. Groaning, you put the bottle down on the counter and walked into the living room to close the curtains. Grabbing one in each hand, you went to pull them together when you hesitated, noticing that Bucky’s apartment was dark for the third day in a row. The sleek motorbike that was usually parked under the slight overhang of the garage was missing as well.

He was probably on a mission, right? Not that it was any of your business. You shut the curtains and turned off the lights before lightly padded down the hall, stopping to adjust the thermostat. The heat kicked on, sending a puff of cold air your way. You shivered as you walked with a quickened pace to your room, shutting the door and heading into the master bathroom, turning the hot water on with just a tad of cold.

Waiting for the shower to warm up, you leaned over the sink and looked into the mirror. Dark circles under your eyes. Small scar on the bridge of your nose. Running your hand through the roots of your hair, you felt for the scar where the stitches had been. When was the last time you had a haircut? Or put on some makeup?

Some higher being must’ve felt pity for you since the steam from the shower fogged the glass, preventing you from tearing yourself apart any further. Stepping underneath the warm stream, you let the warmth seep into your muscles, then bones, filling every fracture and break with a temporary sense of wholeness until the emptiness of your heart and home caused it slowly to drip out until it, along with you, was gone.

---

The next morning, you weren’t motivated to do anything. You lounged around the house, sipping on coffee and browsing on your phone for furniture, clothes, even sneaking a peak at some pianos. Wanting to invest in one you’d use for the next several decades, you had put off buying one until the money from your contract with the orchestra started in a month. You were still well off, nowhere near struggling and probably wouldn’t ever be unless you decided to buy a mansion (which was a no). You just wanted to be careful.

In the afternoon, you popped a pain killer and muscle relaxer in preparation for the few hours you wanted to practice. Thirty minutes went by and the ever-present ache in your shoulder calmed enough to let you practice with relative peace. Sitting on the bench in front of the keyboard, you pondered what you might play to warm up.

Hmm, maybe a Chopin prelude? Short, emotional, familiar.

Your left hand held the soft deep chords as your right hand softly flitted around the higher notes. Breathing in and out with the music, you tried to ignore the ache that start to surround your shoulder.

Playing the last few notes, you paused before reaching over to the bottle of painkillers.

---

Shortly after finishing up, you dragged a small table outside next to the wooden bench swing that was hanging on the porch. Bundled up in a soft sweatshirt, long-sleeve shirt, wool lined leggings, fuzzy socks and slippers, you brought out your hot tea, several blankets, a pillow, and a book you had been meaning to read for months. You were determined to do something besides practice, watch TV, and scroll on your phone.

You settled onto the bench, wrapping the blanket around you, nice and toasty from the layers trapping in the heat of a thorough practice session. The extra medication had really helped keep the pain at bay. Tentatively sipping the steaming cup, you closed your eyes to further appreciate the sweet tones of peach and honey. Setting the cup in your lap with one hand, you used your other hand to flip open to the first page.

---

Bucky hadn’t expected the mission to get so complicated. Finding the base was one thing, navigating in and out of the expansive maze was another. It took a few days to successfully get the target out and back to the embassy. He hadn’t properly slept during that time due to taking shifts with Sam. Not that it was any different from how he slept at home.

The sun was letting its last few rays bless the earth when he turned onto the driveway. Taking it easy on the gravel, he eased his posture and slowed the bike. He put pressure on the brakes as he made it past the final wall of trees that hid the water that was reflecting the last bit of color left in the sky. Rolling casually into a stop, he parked and let out a deep breath, shoulders sinking.

A stray bird calling out turned his attention in the direction of your house. The porch light was on. That’s new, he thought. Squinting his eyes, he saw a bundle on the porch swing. Was that you? Quietly walking over while taking his leather gloves off, he confirmed his suspicions. There you were, lying on your side propped up by a large fuzzy pillow. Eyes closed and breathing rhythmically. Scanning the scene, he noticed the mug on the side table, empty except for the used teabag. Your book was closed, the page you were on marked by one of your fingers. You must’ve fallen asleep while reading.

“Hey…” Bucky said gently. No response besides a small nose scrunch.

He repeated himself a little louder, squatting to be at eye level while gently setting his hand on your arm and shaking you lightly. You groaned this time, eyes fluttering open, taking a moment to focus. You squinted and pushed yourself up into a sitting position, losing your place in the book and attempting to blink the heavy drowsiness from your eyes.

“Bucky?” You questioned hoarsely as you met his eyes. He was still crouching so you were looking slightly down at him. Brow furrowed, you searched the blue of his eyes before looking around to see how dark it had gotten. As you turned your head back to him, he stood back up, scratching the back of his neck just to occupy his hands.

“It’s starting to get cold. I didn’t want you to spend the rest of the night out here.” He explained, choosing to look out at the water, now dark. When he turned his head back, you had also turned your head to look at the water, exposing the side of your neck, the tendons and clavicle accentuated by the strain. Bucky swallowed and your eyes met his, oblivious.

“Ah, thank you. I must’ve fallen asleep reading. I just started going back to physical therapy so I’ve just been so wiped… Anyway,” you said, dismissing yourself mid-thought. He didn’t want to hear about all that. “…did you just come back from a mission?” You eyed the diagonal cuts of leather on his jacket, noting the missing sleeve that exposed the glint of the metal.

“Yeah. I was gone for a few days.”

“Okay. I’m glad you’re home safe.” You mindlessly said, picking up the book and other various items strewn about.

Home safe. What an unfamiliar phrase.

As the words echoed in his mind, you had opened the door and stepped in, turning your head slightly to look back at him.

“Thanks again… Good night.”

“Good night.” Bucky replied, watching as you shut the door softly behind you.

Slowly walking down the porch steps, he crossed the driveway to the garage. Turning his head just in time to see the last light turn off in your house, he stood with his hand on the knob, meditating on the effect that one short sentence had on him.

Glad you’re home safe. Was this what it was like when you had someone waiting on you at home? The tired eyes and gentle smile. Would that be what it was like when he came home in the middle of a night from a mission when he had someone to share a bed with? Gently shaking them to let them know he was home? Or would he try to sneak into bed without waking them? He tried to imagine what that sort of intimacy would be like as he entered his apartment and then his room. Unzipping his jacket and tossing it over a chair, he stripped down to his boxer briefs and climbed into bed, wondering what it would be like if it was already warm.

[zirkkun]

henlo, it is I, zircon, who cannot focus on one project at a time to save my life /hj

But I was struck with a Need to make a character for @alch3mic‘s yandere!fairy tale AU. I didn’t even have any ideas going into this. I just went. “I need to make a character.” For some reason. Hell, I actually know next to nothing about either Dancetale or Twelve Dancing Princesses -- I literally did research for this upon waking up this morning, and then when I scrapped through enough ideas, I finally settled on this!

Also, I know Dancetale!Sans technically has a blue color scheme, or indigo in some depictions; but there already being a two chars in the AU with blue (huntsy and prince) and captain with purple, I figured I should pick something that stuck out a little more. So I went with a blue-green lol. (and injected some mint colors bc... favorite color lol)

More info with my rambling about this skele if you’re interested, but fair warning, there will be some yandere themes given the AU ^^/ -->

Soldier!Sans - goes by “Soldier” in many cases. Was given this nickname for his loyalty to doing every job he’s assigned without question as an information broker.

+ he took up being an information broker after his music composition career began to tank. figured he might as well get money somehow

+ still does music composition when he can. he can play violin and keyboard. usually doesn’t bother with lyrics

+ does not have loyalty to any specific person (... that is, for his job) and will do (nearly) any job without fail.

+ soldier works differently from huntsman and cheshire, who are in similar positions in a way. he doesn’t lack emotions (unlike huntsman), but he has an emotional disconnect with the informational work he does (unlike cheshire) ... y’know, most of the time.

+ his brother has a dance studio called “Enchanted Dancing.” his brother often tries to offer him a job at the studio, since soldier used to be a dancer, but he refuses

+ also refuses to drink alcohol. it makes him sick. frankly, he doesn’t eat much at all because he can get sick really easily... though, whether or not that comes from a lack of eating, he isn’t sure

+ usually does work for the richest parts of the city -- that’s where the most money is

+ isn’t unfamiliar with doing some thievery here and there and selling his findings to his clients. usually they are small but expensive items, like jewelry

+ doesn’t sleep much between working both day and night, but struggles with sleeping regardless. he mostly just takes short breaks from time to time

+ overall is probably the least yandere of the yanderes, since he’s not as likely to kill as he is protect and run away... but he’s very protective

+ physically, he’s fairly tall compared to the rest of the “tiny” skeletons (huntsy, captain, prince, cheshire) and stands a few inches taller than mc. he’s also a lot thinner and a lot more fit, since he did use to be a dancer, although he isn’t anymore

+ he’s quick on his feet and very quiet. his stealth is well-known amongst his former clients, as he’s yet to be spotted by anyone, almost as if he’s completely invisible at night

Basic story concept - loosely based off of Twelve Dancing Princesses, set in the city of the yan!fairytale AU with the rest of the characters.

+ soldier plays the role of well... the solider. he is eventually hired for a long-term job of keeping an eye on one of the Kings’ (a large, extremely wealthy family in the city) adopted children whose siblings say disappears during the night

+ according to the Kings, their child is nearly about to graduate college, but is borderline failing their final semester for reasons the family can’t comprehend. they wake up late in the morning and go to bed oddly early, and the Kings never see them doing their school work and are upset. this is why they hired soldier

+ when soldier does tracks them down inevitably, he’s met with the discovery that they’ve been leaving every night to go to varying different parties. surprisingly, they’re not typically the drunk college parties one would expect. rather, they’re more involved and populated dance parties

+ the first couple of times he finds them, they’re at typical raves, but later on, he finds they’re doing other things as well, such as late-night dance classes. but it always involves dancing. sometimes soldier catches himself critiquing their moves... or sometimes imagining walking up to them and teaching them himself... but then he immediately shuts down the thought and returns to his work

+ soldier eventually reports back to the Kings, who are furious at the news. they, without telling him until much later, end up locking the dancer away. soldier waits a few nights, expecting to follow them again, only for no one to come from the mansion. when he discovers out they’ve been locked away by their own family... something clicks. he isn’t sure what. but something does.

+ solider crosses his usual “loyal to his job” code and breaks into the mansion, not only allowing the dancer to meet him, but bringing them out for the night. bringing them outside so they can dance as they please

+ he isn’t sure the motivation for his actions. it’s as if a spell has been cast on him

+ If you brought me out to dance, why don’t you join me? they ask. soldier refuses. for now. maybe.

+ he is sure of one thing;

+ if they’re going to be locked away anywhere, it’ll be under his protection, not anyone else’s... but he doesn’t want it to come to that. for now, he supposes he’ll assign himself a new job of sorts -- a soldier to protect the aspiring midnight dancer

[illfoandillfie]

can you pleaseee do a blurb with 80s!Roger and younger reader and maybe like it wasn't supposed to be serious but they've fallen in love and roger admits his feelings like during or after sex??? lol sorry if that's too descriptive but i NEED IT! adore your writing btw <3

okay this is such a soft concept and i wrote nearly 2.5k about it so enjoy!

Blurb advent: Day 5

warnings for smut (implied and a little more explicit) but nothing particularly kinky

You met Roger at the airport of all places, first class lounge as you waited to board. There’d been a mix up with your ticket, entirely the airlines fault so they’d bumped you up to first class, free of charge. You felt a little out of place and must have looked it too because before long you were approached by Roger who struck up a conversation, commenting that you looked a little lost. Later he told you it was because you looked nervous and he thought he could help you relax, but you suspect he was actually checking you hadn’t snuck in or something like that. Either way you got talking. Of course, you knew who he was but you managed to play it cool, answering his questions about where you were flying to with only minimal embarrassment. It turned out you were going to the same place, Montreux. Him to meet the rest of the band and begin work on a new album, you as part of a holiday that was taking you through Europe and into Asia. It was nice to have someone to while away the time with before the plane started boarding and then during the flight when Roger took residence in the spare seat beside yours as soon as the seatbelt light had turned off.

For the two or so hours you were in the air you didn’t stop talking, discussing the places you’d been on your trip so far, a lot of which Roger had seen himself over the course of various tours. He was sweet and funny and by the end of the flight you couldn’t remember what about him had made you nervous when he’d first introduced himself.

“So how long did you say you’d be in Montreux for?”

“Two weeks and then it’s on to Germany for a little while.”

“Well, if you need a guide for the next two weeks I’m your man. I’ve spent a lot of time in Montreux so I know it pretty well. I could show you around, make sure you get back to your hotel safe and sound,”

You laughed at the flirty suggestion in his tone, “Don’t you have a band that’ll notice if you’re not there?”

“Yes but they won’t arrive for another few days. I decided to come out early which now I think was definitely the right choice.”

“Alright then, you can be my guide. It’ll be nice to have someone with me, I got totally lost while I was in Greece and obviously I don’t speak a word of Greek so it was hard to get unlost,”

“Sounds like you definitely need me then,”

If you were being honestly, having someone familiar with the area to help you wasn’t your only motivation. Roger was hot, even if he was a little older than you and really, you’d have to be out of your mind to turn down a celebrity who was smart and attractive and openly flirting with you. Especially one with such dextrous fingers as his.

When the plane touched down in Geneva you sort of lost Roger in the chaos of disembarking and finding your luggage and leaving the airport but he found you outside and offered you a lift in the car he already had waiting. He recognised the name of your hotel, though he’d never stayed there himself, and passed it on to the driver as he opened the back door for you. When you arrived at the hotel he offered to help you with your suitcases so you let him walk you inside and wait as you checked in.

“Right well, I’ll pick you up in the morning, 10ish work for you?”

“Sounds great. Where are you going to take me?”

“Haven’t decided yet but it’ll be fun. So I’ll see you tomorrow,”

“Can’t wait.” You watched him leave and then headed up to your room to wash your face and organise your bags before heading off in search of some afternoon tea.

 Roger was true to his word and the next morning he was waiting in the hotel lobby for you. He’d decided to start with Lake Geneva itself, taking you to some historical sites around it and treating you to lunch at a café with a view of the area. You caught him watching you a few times but, aside from offering you his hand to help you over a particularly rocky area and a couple of comments that could be considered flirty, he didn’t make any sort of move. But he came back the next day with two tickets for the Chocolate Train which would take you to Gruyeres for the day. You watched the picturesque scenery roll by from your window, Roger sitting close beside you, his arm draped over your shoulders as he leaned forward and pointed out things you passed. When you turned your head to ask him a question he took the opportunity to kiss you, stealing your breath away in the process. When you arrived in Gruyeres you got to tour where they made the cheese they were famous for and their chocolate factory as well, complete with taste tests. After that you were free to explore the town and visit its shops. Roger took your hand in his as you explored the medieval streets until the train was set to depart again. When he dropped you back at the hotel you were left with an immovable smile and a tingly sensation all over.

Day three included more site seeing, including a vineyard during the day where you shared a bottle of wine with your meal and bought another to take back to the hotel, and the casino in the evening where you had dinner and watched a local jazz musician perform before a few rounds at the card tables. You kissed Roger in the car on the way back to the hotel but were left a little disappointed when he didn’t follow you up to your room. You didn’t have to wait much longer though. On the fourth day Roger once again met you in the morning, this time promising something really special. You weren’t sure what could beat romantic meals and scenic walks but you trusted him and knew you’d have a good time with him no matter what you were doing. He took you to the studio. You couldn’t say it was the most interesting thing you’d seen so far but it was nice to have an insight into his world. He squeezed your hand as he explained all the parts of the studio, animatedly telling you stories of recording there and their rooms at Duckingham Palace and the mischief they all got up to. You laughed a lot and found yourself entranced by the stories and especially by the man telling them. The way his eyes lit up and the excited air he had as he said he’d have to introduce you to the others when they all arrived made your heart skip and you couldn’t help but ask him questions about everything you saw, just to be able to keep listening to him speak. That afternoon he did follow you to your room, unable to keep his hands from you for longer than a minute.

The next morning you woke to find Roger, still naked, snoring peacefully beside you. You snuggled back into his arms and dozed off again, waking a few hours later to him brushing your hair aside. There was no site seeing that day, no fancy restaurants, no cute cafes. In fact, there was no leaving the hotel room at all. You didn’t leave the bed or put on clothes except for when your room service lunch arrived and even then you only put on a robe so you could sit on the balcony and eat, opening the bottle of wine you’d bought at the vineyard. After you’d eaten you returned to the bed for a nap and then picked up where you’d left off once you’d both woken again. Even while you were eating Roger’s hands were never far from you, always ready to pull your hand to his lips or twist a strand of your hair around his finger or else just feel you up. Roger stayed until late that night but reluctantly left when he remembered the others would be arriving in the morning. You spent a lot of the next day catching up on the sleep Roger had kept you from and then exploring the shops around the hotel. You were planning on a quiet night in with a book until you got a call to your room from Roger, asking if you were free for dinner. He took you to a nice restraint, your table illuminated by candlelight, and then accompanied you back to your room to once again fuck you into exhaustion.

It felt good being with Roger even though you both knew it would only be short lived. You weren’t going to be in Montreux forever and it was likely that after you left you wouldn’t see him again. But that was okay. It’d just be a holiday fling, nothing serious. Probably for the best considering the age gap and his work and everything else about you. So what if he made you laugh and made your heart flutter and made you think about introducing you to your friends back home? You pushed aside those thoughts whenever they popped into your head, distracting yourself with touristy attractions and shops and food. Most days you’d fill the time with exploring the area, seeing sites Roger hadn’t got around to showing you. Once or twice Roger was able to get away and spend the day with you, holding your hand and pulling you tight against his side, maybe squeezing your bum when he thought no one was watching. He was true to his word too, bringing you back to the studio to meet everyone else. You spent most of the day with them, chatting and watching them work, though of course Roger did sneak you into the back of his car for a quickie at one point. Generally though, you wouldn’t see him until the evening, sometimes for dinner, always for sex. It seemed he wanted to have you in every position he could think of before you left, as many times as he could physically manage. He ran out of condoms fairly quickly but you told him you were on the pill he kissed you until you were dizzy from lack of air as he took you raw. And so it went for the rest of your trip.

On your last day Roger made sure he was free to spend it with you. He took you around the area, making sure you’d seen everything you should have, never letting you get too far from his grasp. There was an almost melancholy feeling around him, though you thought that might just have been you projecting your own sadness at saying goodbye onto him. It was frustrating to feel that way, to feel unhappy about leaving. You had so many more places to see, experiences to have, and you’d always known that whatever it was you had with Roger would be short lived. And yet you couldn’t help but be sad it was coming to an end. When he was sure you’d seen as much of Montreux as you could, Roger took you back to the hotel for a proper goodbye. He stripped you slowly, kissing your lips and your neck as he went and let you do the same to him before settling you on the bed, shuffling down to kneel between your legs and worship you with his tongue. He’d eaten you out a couple of times before but usually it was a way to make sure you were wet enough to fuck comfortably, his mouth entirely focused on your clit as his fingers stretched you open. Not this time though. This time Roger went slow, his movements deliberate as he trailed his tongue through your slit, kissing your cunt, avoiding your clit until you were quivering with built up need. Only after you were whining for more did he give you his fingers and drop his lips to your clit, praising you between the wet sucking noises and encouraging you to let go. When you did finally cum he prolonged the orgasm for as long as he could, leaving you panting and speechless. He left you with marks too, love bites on your thighs and breasts, as if he were trying to stamp himself all over your body so you wouldn’t forget him. And when you rode him he left crescent shaped indents over your arse and thighs where he held you so tight his nails dug into your skin. You cherished every one, relishing the way he touched you, the way he sighed your name as you sank down on his cock, every rough breath and horse moan, the feeling of being so full of him.

It was late when you both finally accepted you were too exhausted for more. You let Roger wrap you up in his arms again, stroking you hair as he held you close, wanting to prolong the moment for as long as you could. He was quiet for a while, his breathing evening out, and for a moment you thought he’d fallen asleep. Suddenly he spoke.

“Y’know the others keep giving me shit for coming here every night. At best they think you’re just a pretty young toy to keep me busy and at worst the start of a midlife crisis. But you’re not. They don’t get it.”

“What do you mean?”

“I have really loved spending all this time with you for the last couple of weeks. Not just the sex, all of it. Taking you out, showing you sites, just spending time with you. You’re funny and bright and fun and I think I love you, which even as I say it sounds ridiculous because it’s only been two weeks but whatever I’m feeling definitely isn’t platonic and it’s definitely not just about the sex. I don’t know. Am I crazy to think there’s something here?”

You turned around to face him properly, studying his features for any signs on insincerity.

“Sorry, I’m being stupid.”

You leaned in to kiss him softly, immediately feeling him kiss back, “don’t apologise. You’re not crazy and you’re not stupid, I think I love you too.”

[harryskalechips]

A little blue

A/n I’m sorry this was supposed to be up at 12. Last night I couldn’t’ stop playing sims and I had no motivation to finish this. LOL it’s kinda messy sorry

It’s sad that he notices her throughout the night but the only words of affection that can come out of his mouth are hurtful.

Word count: 2765

It all began when Y/N first moved to Los Angeles, California for an opportunity to be an intern at a fabulous publishing office. Her cousin who lives in England had an ex-roommate Sarah, who just happened to be living in LA for quite some time now. Being the nicest out of all Y/N’s cousins, she gave their phone numbers to one another so they can meet up and Y/N can have a friendly face in the city. After that, Y/N got to know Mitch, Adam, Ny, Charlotte, and Jeff along with his girlfriend Glenne.

At first, she didn’t know they were in a band playing for THE Harry Styles. She just happened to know they were co-workers and they all had to move to adapt to their work schedule. Sarah would bring up a man named Harry and she always suggested that they should meet each other. Sadly, it took longer than usual since this man was always busy.

When Harry first heard about the new girl, Y/N, he was intrigued as to who this girl can be. One night while his band was over rehearsing in his home studio, Charlotte brought up the idea of inviting Y/N, which all Harry can say was yes due to him wanting nothing more than to make people happy. It was a shock really how when his eyes first met the new girl’s, he felt something in his stomach as if for some unknown reason he just had butterflies.

“Harry, this is Y/N. Y/N, this is Harry Styles!” Sarah ecstatically says as she watches Y/N’s eyes light up. She didn’t know if she was going to tell her friends this but she was a big fan of Harry when he was still in One Direction and although she listens to his new solo music, she never realized that her friends were the music prodigies of his band!

“H-hi… Harry.” Y/N sweetly smiles as she takes a step forward to him. He was ultimately very pretty and if her heart had never beaten so fast for a boy before, today was the day.

“Hey.” He gives a small smile as he looks for Mitch’s eye contact instead. Mitch was confused about why Harry was acting all distant, usually, he’s very outgoing.

As that day progressed and many more outings with the group, Y/N grew the idea of feeling unwanted by Harry. Needless to say, when he would join her, Sarah and Mitch on a night out for fun. He would constantly ignore her. He never really looked her way and when she would ask him questions about himself, he was always giving short answers. For fuck’s sake, he gives out more information in a regular interview.

She didn’t want to believe he didn’t like her but actions speak louder than words and Y/N was starting to feel that he resented her.

~

“Happy Birthday Mitch!” Y/N leaps into Mitch’s arms after he opened his front door for her. Today was Mitch’s birthday and the whole gang decided to come over to his house to hang out and play games before heading out to the club. Y/N was very excited because it’s her first party after living in LA for months.

“Y/N, I’m glad you’re here!” Mitch hugs her back just as tightly. As they pulled away, Mitch took his present so he could open them later. “Get some food and grab a beer, everyone is in the living room.”  Y/N smiled happily as she took her shoes off and headed deeply more into the familiar house.

“Y/N, why were you the last one! I’ve been waiting for you!” Sarah stands up from the floor to hug the sweet girl. Although Y/N is younger than the rest of her friends, they never failed to make her feel just as accepted.

“I’m sorry, I had to reorganize my boss’ files last minute.” She pouts. Sarah mindlessly reaches out to give her a bottle of beer.

“It’s alright, I’ll be back. I’m just going to help Mitch in the kitchen.” Sarah walks out of the room but the silence is quickly filled as all her other friends are enthused by her presence. Y/N walks around, giving her friends hugs but at last, Harry is sitting alone on one of the couches. He didn’t really say hi to her when she first arrived and as she was walking around greeting everyone, he made sure to start a conversation with Adam.

“Hey, Harry.” Y/N greets the man in front of her politely. She was trying hard not to let him see her heart eyes for him. It was not a lie that Y/N developed a crush for him despite his cold attitude towards her. If anything, it made her want to know more about him.

“Hey.” Harry looks up and gives a small smile. He doesn’t try to reach out and hug her.

“Y/N, Come here and take a selfie with us!” Charlotte pats the seat beside her as she and Ny try to find the perfect angle on her phone.

~

As the night went by, the group of friends played various board games. The sun had just set and it was now their cue to head to the club. “Okay, I really don’t want to say this but we need two drivers to stay sober tonight.” Sarah bites her lip as everyone exits the house.

“I’ll stay sober tonight,” Adam speaks up. It wasn’t a surprise since he had two kids at home and he didn’t want to wake up in the morning making breakfast with a hangover. Lastly,  the boy beside Mitch spoke up.

“Yeah, I don’t mind driving tonight.”

“Harry,” Ny interrupted, “Out of all of us, you should be the one drinking. You’ve had so many meetings this week.”

“No, it’s fine.” he laughs and flashes a smile. “If anything, I’ll call my driver but I don’t think I’ll be drinking too much.”

“Perfect! Let’s go!” Sarah cheered as she grabbed my hand to go in the car with her. In Adam’s car, Charlotte, Ny, Jeff and Glenne hopped in. Leaving Harry to take Mitch, Sarah, and Y/N.

As the two boys rode in the front, Sarah and Y/N sat in the back. With a nudge in the hip, Y/N looks at Sarah surprisingly. “What?”

“Are you okay?” Sarah whispers, hoping the boys in the front won’t notice as they’re in their own conversation. “You’ve been off throughout the whole night.” Y/N didn’t want to tell Sarah how she felt but the more she thought about it, she believed it wouldn’t hurt anybody.

“Harry doesn’t like me.” She bites her lip as she stares out the window. She didn’t want Harry or anybody to see her cry over a stupid thing. As she looks up, she catches Harry already looking at her through the rear window. Coughing loudly, Harry looks away and replies to Mitch.

“That’s not true! He’s not the kind of guy who would hate anybody for no reason.” Sarah tries to convince Y/N.

“It’s okay don’t-”

“Harry, can I ask you a favour?” Sarah interrupts Y/N as she calls for the boy behind the wheel.

“Yeah.” Harry replies as he parks in the lot.

“Can you watch over Y/N tonight? It’s her first time in an exclusive night club. She’s kind of scared. Plus, I want to be with Mitch tonight.”

“Um no. I can’t do that.” Harry replies shortly as Mitch and Sarah’s eyes widen. “I want to have fun tonight. I don’t want to babysit. She’s a grown girl. Make her sit with Adam the whole night. I don’t really care.”

“Ha-” Mitch tries to speak up.

“Let’s go.” Harry interrupts as he steps out of the car.

If Y/N wasn’t thinking of crying tonight, she sure is when she gets home. Sarah softly mouths a sorry as the group walked in the club together.

~

TAO was the hotspot tonight and the room was on fire. The group was together earlier sipping on their drinks but as the night kept going, Jeff, Glenne, Ny and Charlotte decided to hit the dance floor leaving the rest at the table hanging out. As Y/N was coming back from the washroom to the table in the VIP area, she could hear their conversation.

-

“Harry, you know Sarah wasn’t asking you to babysit her. More of just talking to her and keeping an eye on her.” Mitch reasons as the man he was talking to kept staring at his drink.

“Well it doesn’t matter. I didn’t want to do it and I still don’t.”

“You know I was thinking, she may have a crush on you.” Adam teases as Mitch and Sarah laugh. “I mean every time I’m hanging out with you guys at lunch or something, she always asks where you are.”

“Maybe, she’s just curious!” Sarah slaps the table at the obvious thought.

“No, it’s different! Trust me. For example, remember when we went out for sushi last week, she kept looking at Harry and the guy was on the opposite end of the table. I think she has a thing for you.” Adam playfully shoves Harry.

“Who wouldn’t have a thing for him, he’s Harry Styles!” Mitch laughs louder taking a sip of his vodka. He was already slurring.

“Y/N is not my type. First off she’s like 22, She just turned legal to even be here. Secondly, she’s too...I don’t know how to say it… soft? I don’t think we’re compatible I can’t stand her when all she does is talk about stupid things. I simply just don’t like her.”

“Harry!” Sarah scolds him as she feels offended he would say those things about Y/N.

-

“Hey, are you here alone?” A man seductively says as he stands beside her, watching the same table she’s looking at. “You must be star struck seeing Harry Styles here. He comes often.” He smirks. Y/N was barely listening to the unnamed guy as she felt tears start to fall from her eyes. As she wipes them away, she looks up to see just Harry at the table. The others must’ve gone to the dance floor.  Y/N walks back to the table, ready to grab her purse and leave. Her night was spoiled from the beginning because of Harry’s coldness but this was the last straw.

“Y/N, were you crying?” Harry watches the girl in front of him search for her purse in the booth.

“Hey beautiful, I didn’t even get your number!” The unnamed boy walks up to their table.

“Did you make her cry?” Harry stands up rolling up his sleeves. He angrily looks at the man. Y/N was so confused about why he was acting this way.

“What? No man. I saw her standing there alone for a few minutes. I’ll back off.” The guy steps back, looking back at Harry in shock. “No, I’ll come with you!” Y/N speaks up wiping away her final tears. “You’re not going anywhere,” Harry replies shortly, glaring at her.

“It’s my decision, not yours.” She replies with an attitude. Harry’s eyes soften as he realizes this is the first time she acted this way in front of him despite his coldness and attitude in the past months. He wasn’t stupid, he was acting rude on purpose despite it slowly killing him.

“Sarah told me to watch over-”

“You fucking said no!” Y/N slams her purse on the table in frustration.

“Alright, I’ll be downstairs, just look for me.” The guy widens his eyes as he leaves the pair alone.

“Well, I said yes now!” Harry looks over the empty drinks on the table in frustration. “Why were you crying?” He asks rudely again, almost as if he’s annoyed that her crying messed up his whole night.

“Fuck you!” Y/N grabs her bag and leaves. She didn’t notice by the time she was out it was pitch dark and Harry had followed her. “Leave me alone Harry.”

“You think I’m going to let you go home in that tiny dress. Fuck’s sake!” Y/N turns around to scream at him. She’s had it. These past months, she may have had a crush on Harry but tonight made her realize that he’s nothing but an asshole who likes supermodels.

“Are you fucking kidding me right now! What is wrong with you! You barely spoke two words to me these past four months and now you’re concerned about what I’m wearing? Fuck you!”

“Y/N…”

“I don’t want to hear it, okay?! I heard what you told the others at the table while I went to the washroom. I just don’t fucking understand why you hate me! You neve-” She was crying uncontrollably as her body started shaking. Harry without another thought, took her in his arms for the first time.

“I’m sorry okay, I’m sorry.” He whispers as he rubs her back.

“You never gave me a chance and you knew I liked you! I put a stupid crumpled wrapper in your jacket at Ny’s BBQ last month. I was fucking drunk and I was waiting for you to at least confront me about it. You never did!”

“You’re right. I saw the paper.” He pulls away and takes her hand instead so he can walk her to his car. As he opened the door for her and she got in. He texted the group chat letting his other friends know he left to bring Y/N home. He also texted his driver to pick Sarah and Mitch up when they’re ready.

“Are you okay?” Harry whispers as he watches the girl stare at her hands.

“I get it you don’t like me. Maybe, it’s best if I find a new friend group so you won’t feel annoyed.”

“I don’t feel annoyed okay?”

“Then why are you so mean?” She looks up to see him staring at his wheel blankly.

“The first time I heard about you, I was really excited.”

“So I wasn’t up to your expec-”

“No, you were. I think you were above my expectations. When I saw you for the first time, I got butterflies. I know it’s stupid but I just wasn’t expecting you to be so pretty.”

“You don’t have to pull shit out your ass Harry.” Y/N pouts because she remembered that day clearly as possible. He gave a short hi then walked away as if he didn’t care she was part of the friend group now.

“No, it’s true.” He bites the inside of his cheek then looks at Y/N. “I thought you were really cute and I don’t know I guess I freaked.”

“Why? You’re so famous, you dated supermodels before and you can’t even hold a conversation with me.”

“I’ve only been in one serious relationship. To be honest, when she broke up with me I- I just felt like I needed a break from love. Then you came and it felt like my whole past relationship didn’t matter anymore although it still does. I’m not over it and I don’t want to develop any more feelings for you knowing that.”

“Harry…” Y/N takes hold of his hand out of his lap. “It’s not fair that you had to push me away without saying anything. I don’t even care if you liked me or not. I just wished you didn’t have to hurt me all the time.”

“I know.”

After that night, Harry expected Y/N to be more present during their group hangouts. He was no longer feeling restricted or uncomfortable with her because she knew the truth of how he felt. Although he was still nervous about seeing her again, he knew he would make it up to her so she can see who he truly is. He’s not a bad guy, he’s just been hurt way too many times.

But as time kept going and schedules got busier, Y/N stopped showing her face in the group. She had excuses lined up for each night and Harry was now the one who kept asking where she was. As his heart started to mend, her’s started to change a little blue.

Part 2!

[karajaynetoday]

clear eyes, full hearts, can't lose | ashton irwin

image source 

hello friends! yes it is after 2am in my timezone, OOPS. But the inspiration struck, and the writing gods blessed me with motivation and words, so here’s part 3 of charlie rose, ten fingers, ten toes. apologies for any typos, i’m a lil delirious right now. Thank you so much to everyone for their lovely feedback and shares with the previous parts. Also shout out to any Friday Night Lights fans who got a lil kick out of the title of this one lol. Enjoy!

Read Part 1 here | Read Part 2 here 

Word count: 4.1k

Warnings: none

(This is a fem reader insert)

More writing here | send thoughts/feedback/suggestions here | if you’d like to be on my taglist go here

After your quiet moment of togetherness on the beach that evening, you felt more comfortable around Ashton than ever before. Previously small touches were held for longer; instead of accidentally waking up in each other’s arms, you purposefully went to sleep that way; and Ashton’s hand slipped into yours whenever he could manage it.

Charlie Rose still crept into your bedroom every morning for her favourite snuggles, and then she began joining her Uncle Ashton out on the deck for some morning yoga every day as well (which was possibly the cutest thing you had EVER seen). Charlie tried her best to follow all of his poses and stay as quiet as she could, but her favourite part was when the yoga was over and Uncle Ashton used her as a body weight for his push-ups and bench presses, bopping her nose between each rep and earning a giggle in response. Again, a contender for the cutest thing you’d ever seen. 

You spent your days on the beach or relaxing in the villa, and your nights eating out and then stargazing on the deck. You were getting far too used to paradise, and you had to keep reminding yourself that the holiday would soon come to an end. You noticed Ash spending more and more time looking at emails on his phone as your time in Maui progressed, and it started you thinking about how busy his life was about to become. Tour was kicking off a few weeks after you were due to return from Hawaii, which meant Ashton would be criss-crossing all over the US for a few months, before a short break and then heading to Europe and eventually Australia. 

As you watched him build yet another sandcastle with Charlie on a lazy afternoon, you realised just how much effort Ash was putting into spending time with Charlie and making memories with her. Of course, you’d had a lot of Charlie Rose quality time as well, and spent some nice one-on-one time with Alice that you hadn’t really had since Charlie had arrived (naturally, Alice had tried her best to pry information from you about exactly what was going on between you and Ashton, but you didn’t quite know yourself yet, so you’d brushed it off the best you could). But Ashton had barely gone a few weeks without seeing Charlie her entire life, and especially now that she was a little bit older, she was definitely going to know that he was away, and you weren’t quite sure how she’d take it. You also weren’t sure how you’d take it, either. 

Your mind was running into overdrive with increasing anxieties, and you just didn’t know how to voice any of them. On your final night in Maui, after another incredible beachside dinner and a trip to get Charlie’s favourite ice cream, you were folding clothes from the dresser into your suitcase quietly while Ashton was in the shower. You know you needed to talk to him about how you were feeling, but not quite knowing what that even was was driving you up the wall. You hated the overbearing sense of uncertainty. Did Ashton even want something more than a holiday romance from you? You’d only kissed again a handful of times, and despite increasing tension between you, the only thing happening beneath the sheets of your shared bed was some very wholesome spooning (not that you were complaining). Was more-than-friends even on the table? Did you want it to be on the table? Could you handle months of Ashton being away on tour, and the critical eye of his fans and the media? Were you reading into everything too much? Oh god, why were you like this?

You were snapped out of your trainwreck of thoughts by the bathroom door opening, and in your peripheral vision you saw Ashton step out with a fluffy white towel wrapped around his hips. You busied yourself with folding more clothes, but your hands faltered as you felt Ashton come closer, and you sucked in a breath when he slipped his arms around your waist and pulled your back against his bare chest. 

“Why are you packing already, darlin’? We’ve still got the whole night to enjoy.” Ash whispered against your ear, before pressing soft kisses down one side of your neck. You closed your eyes for a moment, enjoying the sensation, before all of the anxiety you’d been grappling with came flooding back into your mind and without meaning to, your entire body tensed up. Ashton immediately sensed the change in your demeanour, and stopped what he was doing. He let go of your hips, and gently tilted your head to face him.

“What’s on your mind?” He tried gently, knowing that you hated confrontation (Ashton’s love for it was a huge part of what intimidated you in your first few interactions all those years ago). 

You sighed, before turning around to face him completely as you perched on the edge of the bed. Ashton sat down next to down, and loosely linked his hand with yours. 

“What… what are we, Ash?” You whispered, not wanting to meet his gaze as your heart started beating faster and faster.

“What do you want us to be?” Ashton countered, squeezing your hand softly.

“I want…” You trailed off, closing your eyes and inhaling deeply. “I want us to be as close as we are, always. I want to have you by my side, while we get to be Charlie’s godparents and watch her grow up and support her achieving her dreams. I want everything we’ve had in Maui, and I want more, but I just… I don’t know how this all works, once we’re back in LA and I’m stuck working a 9-5 while you’re touring the world meeting incredible, probably attractive people, and then I started thinking about what would happen with Charlie if we didn’t work out and I… I don’t know how to make this work. “ Oh god, you were rambling now, but every anxiety that had crossed your mind in the last few days was tumbling out and you couldn’t stop it now.

Ash waited for you to stop talking, and took your other hand in his. 

“That’s all valid, babe. I don’t know how this works either. I’ve had relationships while I’ve been on the road before, sure, but this is different. Because it’s us. You… You mean more to me than anyone else, but I know it’s scary. For both of us.” Ashton said softly, raising your hands to his face and kissing them. 

“Charlie’s going to be important to both of us for the rest of our lives. We’re going to be there for her, like you said, and that means we’re also unavoidably going to be around each other. If we date and it doesn’t work out, we can’t let that get between us being the best godparents Charlie Rose could ever have, because I know we both love that little girl more than anything… but, I also don’t want to let the fear of us not working out hold us back from even trying, you know?” 

Damn it. Why did he always have to be so wise? A wordsmith, of sorts. 

“I know, Ash. I know it shouldn’t hold me back, and I’ve let fear hold me back from a lot of things, too many things…” You paused, as your mind flashed back to the last time you had a serious conversation about a relationship with someone. Someone who’d ripped your heart out and stomped on it several times over. You shook your head, trying to shake away the memories. 

“But I don’t want you to think that I don’t want to give us a chance. I do. But I’m a little out of practice at this, and the last time I tried, it didn’t go so well.” You grimaced, as the flashbacks continued no matter how hard you tried to block them out. 

“And I respect that you’re going to need time to feel comfortable with whatever this is. I can’t promise to wait forever, but I can tell you that right now I’ll give this a chance, if you’ll let me.” Ashton spoke firmly, ducking down to meet your eyes.

“Okay. But slowly, right?” You looked at Ash properly for the first time all night, and his hazel eyes gazed back at you steadily, with a glint of excitement at your agreement. 

“Slowly. I will cancel the romantic beachside dinner with a string quartet, and put a hold on asking you to move in the minute we land at LAX.” Ashton said solemnly, before cracking a grin at what must’ve been a slightly panicked expression on your face. 

“I’m kidding, you dork. We’ll take it slow. I’m going to be gone for a while anyway, so we’ll have to kind of take it slow thanks to circumstance anyway. But you’ve got to let me take you out a few times before then, deal?” Ashton stuck his hand out, and you shook it, rolling your eyes at his antics.

“Pleasure doing business with you. Now then, I should probably put some pants on…” Ashton murmured, looking around the room for his clothes and getting up from the bed to pull some shorts out of his suitcase by the door. You were, quite frankly, ogling his toned back and shoulder muscles, when a knock at the door snapped you back to reality.

“Charlie wants both of you to come read her bedtime story, please!” Alice’s voice sounded through the door, sounding tired and a little on edge. For a tiny human, Charlie sure knew how to make a big performance out of bedtime. Ashton finished getting dressed, and he tugged your hand into his as you made your way over to Alice and James’s room where Charlie was snuggled into her cot. Tonight’s book of choice was from the Little Feminist collection you’d bought Charlie when she was a baby, and you read all about Malala, and Ruth, and Frida, and Rosa, until her little eyes closed and her breathing steadied. You and Ashton took turns to lean into the crib and kiss Charlie’s forehead silently, before making your way back to your own bedroom for one last sleep before your scheduled return to Los Angeles. 

Leaving Maui felt much harder than arriving - not helped by the tantrum Charlie threw when you explained there was no time for yoga or sandcastles. After James had calmed her down and negotiated one final quick walk on the beach while the rest of you checked out of the hotel, you made your way to the airport and onto the first flight and then the second with ease. You’d learnt your lesson from the previous long-haul flight, and Ashton had downloaded a few more Charlie-friendly apps onto his iPad that she happily engaged with. She barely left Ashton’s side for the whole flight, and you started to wonder if she’d sensed his impending departure on tour. Sure, Charlie was only small, but her emotional intelligence was remarkable (I mean, as her godmother you were maybe a little biased, but maybe you had a child prodigy on your hands, who knows?!) and you weren’t looking forward to seeing them bid each other farewell in a week or so. 

You and Alice shared an iPad and watched a few episodes of Friday Night Lights. It was one of your favourite shows that you’d binged watched together one summer, and rewatching it brought you comfort (and a fair dose of fangirling over Tim Riggins, and a recurring debate on whether or not he should’ve ended up with Lyla or Tyra). It was an emotional rollercoaster, and the small town of Dillon in the show reminded you of the one you’d grown up in (albeit a little more Texan, and a bit more enthusiastic about American football specifically). After landing at LAX and disembarking, you made your way to the long term parking garage and helped James and Alice load their luggage and Charlie into their car. You were about to get in yourself, when Ashton cleared his throat behind you.

“Can I give you a lift? You’re just around the corner from me, it’s not out of the way.” Ashton said brightly, pre-empting any excuses that you were about to come out with about you being a bother. You agreed, and he took your suitcase from your hands and led you towards his car that was parked nearby. The car ride home was quiet, and when Ashton pulled into your driveway, you didn’t want to unbuckle your seatbelt and get out of the car. Because that would mean that the magic of vacation was truly over, and you didn’t like that idea at all. 

“Come on, slow poke. I’ll help you carry your stuff inside.” Ashton tapped your nose, disrupting your internal dialogue. You reluctantly followed his lead and got out of the car and headed inside, groaning to yourself about the idea of having to do laundry and all of your unattended life admin the next day, to ready yourself for a return to work on Monday. Ashton pulled your suitcase into your bedroom, and laughed when you flopped down onto the bed and moan in annoyance into the pillow.

“Post-holiday blues, gorgeous?” His tone was teasing, and you could hear the stupid smirk on his face. 

“Not all of us have the luxury of a rockstar lifestyle, Irwin. No more late nights or sleep ins for me. Back to the daily grind.” You sighed, pushing yourself up onto your elbows at the edge of the bed.

“Well…” Ash crouched down so your faces were level. “How about I make it a bit less of a travesty by taking you to brunch tomorrow? Just us.” He shot you a wink as he spoke.

“Just us?” You felt yourself smiling, and oh yes, there were those butterflies again.

“Just us. Pick you up at ten.” Ashton beamed as you nodded, and he quickly pressed his lips to yours before you could say anything in response. You reached up and linked your hands behind his neck in an attempt to deepen the kiss, but Ashton caught onto your arms and untangled them, before pulling away.

“Slowly, remember? Gotta keep something up my sleeve for you, darlin’.” Ashton smirked, pressing one final kiss to your lips and standing up to his full height. “I’ll see you tomorrow at ten. Sweet dreams, babe!” He shot you another wink, and strolled right out of your bedroom without another word. Damn, he had you good. 

Brunch was delightful, there was no other way to describe it. Conversation between you and Ashton flowed easily, but there was also comfort and content in the silences you shared as well, sipping coffee and eating your smashed avocado. Ashton had a few days of final rehearsals and meetings this week before flying out for the first tour date on Friday. On Thursday, you were scheduled to babysit Charlie, and you’d suggested to Ash that perhaps you could go to the nearby park and play on the playground. He’d agreed, and was going to see if Calum wanted to come along and bring Duke. Charlie Rose loved her godparents, but she also loved dogs, especially ones that were a little more Charlie-size friendly. She did not love Calum (yet), but that was mostly because he liked to rile her up with arguments about who Ashton’s best friend was (logically, it was Calum, but emotionally, Charlie was definitely giving him a run for his money). 

On Thursday the sun was shining, so you headed to the park with a bubbly and chatty Charlie Rose in tow (once you’d ensured you’d both slip, slop, slapped for sun safety, of course). Charlie had insisted on wearing her brand new overalls that Alice had hand-embroidered her name and a series of colourful roses onto, and a bright yellow sunhat to match her seemingly sunny disposition. The park was fairly empty when you arrived, and you easily spotted Ashton and Calum resting on a park bench by the swings. Charlie spotted them also, and tugged on your hand for permission to run over, which you gave her.

“Charlie Rose! How’s my best girl?” Ashton’s voice boomed across the park, as he lifted Charlie up into a hug and then swung her around, causing Charlie to shriek with excitement. You reached the park bench and set down the tote bag you’d brought along, and Cal stood up to hug you hello with Duke in his arms. 

“Thank god you’re here, mate. We were starting to get some weird looks from the mums over there.” Cal muttered, pulling away from you and setting Duke down on the ground.

“Duke! My best puppy!” Charlie yelped excitedly, wriggling out of Ashton’s arms to greet her favourite furry friend, who patiently stood still while she petted him softly and wrapped her arms around his neck.

“Gentle, Charlie,” You reminded, crouching down to her level. “Did you say hi to Cal? He brought Duke to the park, just for you.” You gently prompted, smiling encouragingly at your goddaughter, who eyed you suspiciously before fixing Calum with a glare. 

“Hi. I guess.” 

You had to stop yourself from cracking up at Charlie’s blunt tone in greeting Calum, and you could see Ashton doing the same. Cal just smiled at Charlie, before producing a tennis ball from his back pocket and offering it to her.

“Wanna play fetch with Duke, Charlie? I’ll let you have the first throw…” Cal offered cautiously. Charlie grabbed the ball from his hand and bounded off with Duke on his lead, and Calum scrambled to follow her. 

“You got it, Cal?” Ash called after him, half-serious, half-laughing.

“Yep! Got it! We’ll be best friends in NO TIME, just you wait!” Calum called back, as Charlie stopped a few metres from him. She liked to push the boundaries sometimes, but Charlie Rose also knew the rules, and not to go too far from her grown ups when you were out and about. 

Countless rounds of fetch, a few turns on the swings and one too many trips down the slide (both Calum and Ashton almost got completely stuck) later, it was time to take Charlie back home so that James could come by after work and collect her. Ashton offered to walk you back, and Charlie clapped her hands in delight when he let her climb onto his back for the journey home. She kissed Duke goodbye and mumbled some sort of farewell to Calum (which was progress), and you headed out of the park towards your house.

You’d noticed that Ash had grown reserved on the walk, but he was still listening intently to the story Charlie was telling him about how proud she was of Duke for learning how to play fetch. When you arrived home, he set Charlie down on the couch with an exaggerated groan and a kiss to the forehead, before heading into the kitchen to get himself a glass of water. You followed, sensing that something was up. Ashton was facing away from you at the sink, but he didn’t flinch or react when you brushed a hand along his shoulders reassuringly.

“You okay?” You asked quietly, trying to meet his gaze.

“Yep. Just gotta do the pre-tour goodbyes to my two favourite girls. Sucks, but no avoiding it.” Ashton said, his tone laced with sadness. He gulped down the rest of the water in the glass, and set it on the sink, before turning to you and pulling you into a brief hug.

“Time to rip the bandaid off.” Ash whispered, pressing a soft kiss to the top of your head before heading back into the living room.

“Charlie Rose, can I talk to you for a second?”

Charlie looked up from where she was playing on the floor with a teddy bear you kept here for her, and cocked her head to one side, eyeing Ashton curiously.

“I suppooooose.” She drawled out, making you chuckle. This child had a flair for the dramatics. Ashton crossed the floor of the living room and picked up Charlie, sitting her on his lap as he settled onto the couch.

“Do you remember how I get to play my drums with Calum, Luke and Michael?” He asked slowly, brushing the hair that had come loose from Charlie’s pigtails out of her eyes. She nodded, looking up at him curiously.

“Okay, good. So, there are lots of people that like to hear us play, all over the world. And that means I have to go away for a little while, so we can play our music for them.” Ashton continued, and you could tell he was struggling to keep it together. 

“Oh! So we get to go on more airplanes, like Maui?” Charlie said, excited at the prospect of another adventure.

“You don’t get to come with me this time, Charlie Rose. Maybe you and auntie, and mama and dada can come visit me for a bit of it, but I’m going to go by myself for a little while. But I promise I’ll still FaceTime you lots, and read you stories, and you can tell me all about your adventures with auntie, okay?” Ashton was trying to keep his voice calm and steady, but it was starting to waver, especially as the realisation dawned on Charlie Rose and her bottom lip began to wobble. Ashton noticed, and pulled Charlie in close, whispering reassurances into her ear and rubbing her back as she began to sniffle into his shoulder. 

“What about auntie?” Charlie asked, her voice muffled into Ashton’s shoulder. You sat down on the couch next to Ashton, and rubbed a hand along Charlie’s shoulders.

“What about me, Charlie Rose? I’m not going anywhere, lovebug.” You coaxed reassuringly, giving Charlie a small smile when she turned to look at you and rub her face.

“Yeah, but… but won’t you b-b-be sad that Uncle Ashta’s gone too?” She hiccuped, looking at you with worried eyes and a frown, as her tiny mind tried to process everything that was happening. You saw Ash glance at Charlie in wonder, but then admiration, when he realised what she was trying to say. 

“You’re right, lovebug. I will miss him,” You began, pausing to note the flicker of a smile that crossed Ashton’s face. “But, just like you, I’ll get to call him on the phone heaps, and then maybe we can go and visit him on tour, won’t that be fun?” You tried to speak as brightly as you could muster, but you could feel the anxiety and emotion starting to build in your own chest. If only you could get away with throwing a temper tantrum, but alas.

“Mmm, fun. But… how will you sleep?” Charlie asked, confused.

“What do you mean, bug?” Ashton asked, bopping her on the nose which made her wrinkle her face in confusion. 

“How will you sleep without snuggles?” Charlie asked so innocently that you had to stifle a laugh and partly a cry, because honestly, you had no idea how you were going to cope with the next month or so apart from Ashton. It seemed silly, given you’d been friends for literally years before this, but something had shifted in those close moments you’d shared in Maui, and the sense of content you’d found with Ashton at brunch and the park and other places in between was going to be hard to go without.

“It’s going to be tricky, Charlie, you’re right. But remember, you can always feel your loved ones and how much they care about you, even if they’re not with you, right? And you can do anything you set your mind to, can’t you?” You said softly, as Charlie reached over to you for a hug and pulled you closer to Ashton in the process.

“Yes, we can.” She mumbled, giving you and Ashton slobbery cheek kisses in response.

“What does mama say to auntie when I get frustrated or sad, can you remember?” You prompted, returning Charlie’s kiss on the cheek.

“Oh! Clear hearts, full eyes, can’t lose!” She exclaimed, proud of herself for remembering. You laughed, and Ashton joined you, throwing his arms around you and Charlie in one warm embrace.

“Almost, lovebug. Clear eyes, full hearts, can’t lose.” 

You knew getting through these next few months was going to be a challenge, but in that moment, it felt like you were ready for anything that the universe was going to throw your way. 

More writing here | send thoughts/feedback/suggestions here | if you’d like to be on my taglist go here

Taglist: @suchalonelysunflower​ @blackbutterfliescal​ @redrattlers​ @loveroflrh​ @spicycal​ @notinthesameguey​ @metalandboybands​

[cutelittlestar]

Lone Wolf: Chapter 1 || Peter Parker x Reader

Pairings: Peter Parker x Reader

Summary of the Series: You were given the ability to transform into a wolf, but you’re  unfortunately captured and experimented on by a cynical madman. Despite being saved by the Avengers and given a place to call home, you’re still having a difficult time grasping onto the basic concepts of being human. However, everything changes when you met a boy, Peter Parker. Slowly but surely, he helps you on your path to recovery –showing you that all you needed was love and patience. 

Word Count: 4.3k

*gifs are not mine*

Warnings: injury, mentions of death and pain, kidnapping, physical and mental abuse, torture, MATURE CONTENT, 18+.  

A/N: Hey y’all! I hope you guys are safe and well :) Thank you to everyone who supported me in deciding to write this story, I’m so glad there are people out there willing to read my work (ngl, it still baffles me lol). Anyways, I hope you enjoy this, and lmk if you guys want more!! Although I’m already writing a series at this moment, I wouldn’t mind squeezing in another; however, this might mean that I’ll post the chapters a bit later than expected. Hope y’all understand 💕❤️

There was once a time where you freely roamed the remote wilderness, and you called it home; the soft chirping of the birds in the morning eased your mind, the calm flow of the river was music to your ears, and the beautiful green scenery was your protection. You had decided long ago to leave your pack, knowing it was for the best; you were the outcast of the group, and they constantly mistreated you for it, deciding that your life was less meaningful than theirs. The emotional, mental, and physical abuse you endured was too much to handle, so one night, when your pack was soundly sleeping, you left without a trace, never looking back. Ever since you became a lone wolf, your life became considerably better and worth living for; at first, it was difficult to realize, but then you began to learn the secrets of the woods, and it taught you that all life was precious. You deeply cherished this thought, never letting it go. The wilderness was your guardian and you were its child. However, it was all gone in a blink of an eye, and the sacred memories you once had were burned to ashes, along with your home. 

Men of greed, power, and corruption immediately disrupted your sanction, and they destroyed everything in their path without remorse. You were too scared and weak to fight them off, so you decided to run away. However, despite how hastily you fled, you were quickly surrounded. There was barely any time for you to attack as the soldiers in black gear immediately used their weapons, electrocuting you as many times as they could; you howled in pain, but they mercilessly continued, ignoring your screams before ultimately subduing you.  You thrashed around in the dirt, attempting to escape, but your body was slowly losing its strength, and you soon gave up; as your eyes were on the verge of closing, you faintly remembered a man walking towards you, a man who completely stood out from the rest. The man’s callous face was standing over you, and their void black eyes sent a shiver down your spine. A sinister grin stretched across his face, and that was the last thing you remembered before everything went dark. 

You woke up and realized that you were laying on the cold floor; it was strange and terrifying to you, and you hoped that it was just a nightmare but you were wrong. As you tried to stand up, your body screamed in agony. You shivered in the darkness and realized that you shifted back to your human form. Panic started to grow by the second and you were terrified that the men would learn of your abilities, but it was already too late. 

“You should be more careful of your surroundings, you never know who’s lurking in the dark,” an ominous voice announced, causing you to scoot back in fear. The lights were immediately turned on and you quickly covered your exposed body as a man stood in the middle of the room. You squinted your eyes, taking note of his features, and you immediately recognized him; he was the same man that stood over your body before you passed out. Despite your desire to rip his throat out, you were prohibited from doing because you were caged in a cell. You let out a menacing growl, but the man didn’t react.

“Let me go,” you ordered, but he merely chuckled, shaking his head. 

“Oh Y/N,” the man scolded, and your eyes widened in shock, your body shaking. How did the man know your name? “I’m afraid I can’t do that.” The man’s callous eyes examined you, and he was content with himself, knowing that he was the one that managed to capture the infamous shapeshifter. You were so gullible, the man thought to himself; you actually believed you were safe in the woods. Your heart began to beat faster as you were horrified of the man’s calm yet intimidating demeanor; various situations ran through your head as you wondered what he was going to do to you, but you made a promise to yourself, declaring that you would remain strong. 

“Let’s see if you're better than the other test subjects,” the man disclosed, walking closer towards you. He crouched down to the ground in order to look at your face, excited to see your reaction as he began to unveil his intentions. The threatening glare you tried to maintain utterly failed as you listened to his words, and your breathing got heavier. “I don’t want to kill another shifter, but if I must, I will,” the man whispered, a sinister smirk plastered on his face, pleased at your reaction. Tears threatened to fall down your face as you wondered if the man was speaking about your former pack, but you didn’t want to believe it. 

“Once I get out of this cage, I’ll fucking rip your throat out,” you fumed. You ignored the pain that coursed through your body and jumped at the bars, hoping you would be able to injure him. Although your hand was centimeters away from his throat, the man didn’t flinch at your violent response. Instead, he simply stood up and took a step back. You watched as his eyes darken, but his face remained blank. 

“You may think you’ll have the opportunity, but you never will; you’re going to rot in this cell for the rest of your life, Y/N. Don’t say things you’ll regret,” the man angrily declared. Your chest heavily rose and sank as his words stuck to you, but before you could say anything else, he turned and walked out of the room, leaving you alone with your thoughts and your worst fears. What you didn’t realize at the moment was that he was right. 

Ever since then, you endured horrible and excruciating pain; you were experimented on for a reason they did not explain. No matter how many times you tried to fight, whether by biting, kicking, scratching, hitting, and even killing, it only made things worse for you. After quite some time, it finally began to dawn on you that it was utterly useless to resist; you believed you were going to spend the rest of your life in this tiny cell, and there was nothing you could do. You allowed them to do damage to your body – either by letting them shove countless needles into your skin or allowing them to cut you in order to determine how long it took for you to heal. You endured draining and extensive trials, and you were forced to constantly shift back and forth – despite how many times you almost died due to your horrible conditions. You lost track of how long you’ve been kept in the cage, but as time progressed, your hope in escaping gradually disappeared. You regretted saying those words to him, but it was too late.

The damage was already done. 

☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆

You laid on the concrete floor in your wolf form, softly whimpering to yourself as you were engulfed in the darkness. The men were already gone, but you knew they would be back soon; in this moment of silence, you closed your eyes and attempted to think of your home but your mind remained blank. It was as if those precious memories were gone the minute the men arrived. You knew you could never retrieve them. You wanted to give up so badly, but you never allowed yourself to. While it seemed impossible to ever think that you could escape, you mercilessly clung onto the possibility. However, it wasn’t hope that motivated you. No, there was only one emotion that was capable of doing this: rage. Your hatred was the thing that kept you alive, and you constantly imagined all of the horrific actions you would commit if there was a chance of escaping. 

The sound of footsteps disrupted your thoughts, and you immediately remained still and closed your eyes. The door was swung open, and you were able to recognize the two distinct smells that were attached to the men. The two men, Hughes and Perez, walked towards your cell, but you continued to remain frozen, hoping the men would think you were unconscious. 

“Fucking hell, it smells like death,” Perez stated in disgust; the men now stood inches away from your cell, but they kept their distance, afraid you would attack them whenever you had the chance. 

“Shut up,” Hughes whispered, “and step back from the cage–you have to be prepared–you never know if she’ll attack.”

Perez let out a laugh, amused at his partner’s remark. “She’s unconscious, you have nothing to be scared of. Look.” You mentally prepared yourself as you heard Perez get closer despite Hughes’ protests; he whipped out a taser baton and a blue light flickered. Within an instant, Perez angrily struck the baton down on your body, and a cynical smile formed on his lips as he enjoyed the way the electricity burned your fur and your skin. You bit your tongue down so hard that blood was drawn, and you wanted nothing more than to lunge at Perez and rip off his arm; yet, you didn’t move, thus, proving to Hughes that Perez was right. 

“Tsar was right,” Perez announced, putting his baton back on his buckle, “there’s no reason for us to be afraid anymore.” You felt your heart beat faster as you finally heard the name given to the man. Tsar, such a typical title. After such a long time, you never believed you would have the power to laugh nor find happiness again, but at this moment, you wanted nothing more than to let out a chuckle; the man compared himself to monarchs and supreme rulers. What a joke. However, your desire to laugh quickly disappeared as you heard Perez continue speaking. 

“Tsar already got what he needed from her. Sooner or later, we’ll be just as strong as her–perhaps even stronger. Can you imagine an army of shifters? The Avengers wouldn’t stand a chance. Now, it’s our time to shine, brother.” It felt as if your heart stopped beating in your chest, and it became more difficult for you to breathe; you were unable to grasp his words. An army of shifters? Was that why they experimented on you? Suddenly, everything made sense; they were going to use your DNA to make soldiers for war– soldiers who would have the ability to transform into a beast– and the thought utterly terrified you. While you’re not aware of who the Avengers are, you assumed they were in opposition to Tsar. However, it doesn’t suggest that the Avengers are good people–maybe they’re just competitors, striving to be at the top of the food chain. 

In a blink of an eye, the two men were gone, and once again, you were left all alone. You wish you had the strength to fight off every man, but you knew it was impossible. If Perez was right, Tsar would soon have an army of shapeshifters, and they would be unstoppable. Unfortunately, there was nothing else you could do. Your time was up and it was already too late. He got what he needed from you, and soon, they would dispose of you like trash. You never expected to die like this; you always imagined yourself laying on a fresh patch of grass, next to the lilies, before you took your last dying breath. Tears ran down your face as you began to accept your fate. You would die in this small cell, never having the opportunity to see the sun again.

Yet, the relatively quiet room eased your mind, and in a mere second, you were able to conjure up a pleasing image; while it did not resemble your old home, it depicted a warming view of the ocean. As you imagined yourself standing on the shore, it felt as if the picture you created in your mind was coming to life. You could hear the waves of the ocean gently rocking, but off in the distance, you could hear another sound, a sound that did not fit the blissful scenery. Without warning, a massive explosion erupts, causing the ground to roughly shake, and you open your eyes in shock and fear. You bolted upright as you heard from distance men shouting obscenities and commands; the distant sirens began to wail, and they were coming closer to you. Your head began to hurt as the uncertainty teased your hopes, but you tried your hardest to remain composed. Gunshots and blasts came one after the other in rapid succession, and you then heard sounds of screams echo across the building, causing shivers to run down your spine. Footsteps were coming closer to where you were being held, but you didn’t know how to react; should you be relieved or should you be scared? 

The door was instantly kicked down, its hinges falling as well, but the very first second that it happens, you’re confused; the light from the outside completely engulfs the room, and it turns you blind and disoriented for a slight moment. You’re able to see a figure standing in front of the door, but they did not move a single muscle. Things seem oddly calm, but you took a step back in fear, your tail cowardly hiding in between your legs. Your ears flattened down against your head, and you let out a soft whimper, petrified of what could happen next. The person was wearing an ominous suit, distinguishing itself from the men that held you captive, but as they tried to step closer, your instincts to protect yourself came out. Suddenly, your ears and your fur bristles are fully erect, and your lips curl back, your incisors displayed; despite still being in a cell, you let out a snarl, telling the person that if they came any closer, you would attack them without hesitation. 

“Hey, it’s okay,” the voice softly spoke, slowly walking towards you. The voice was comforting, and it sounded as if the person was barely a young adult. As the person came closer, you began to take note of their red and blue suit; there was a spider at the center of their chest, and they reminded you of a hero in a children’s book, but you were still terror-stricken. While this person was different than the other men, they all had one thing in common: they all wore masks. Not being able to see the person’s face made you uneasy, and you continued to bark and snarl.

Peter understood your fear and aggression, and he respectfully stopped moving; however, he was saddened at the scene in front of him. The wolf clearly showed signs of wanting to trust him, but due to the horrible conditions it endured, any person was a threat to them. “I’m not going to hurt you,” Peter reassured; while it may have been idiotic for Peter to speak to an animal, he felt as if you understood every single word that came out of his mouth. You stopped growling, but your hairs stood erect on your back, suspicious of the man’s actions. 

“We have a problem, guys. Meet me here soon,” Peter announced on his comms, alerting the rest of the Avengers; your ears perked up as you realized that he wasn’t alone, and you stepped back, afraid of what was about to come. The building was now completely silent, signifying that the Avengers successfully completed their mission. Peter eyed you carefully, watching as you paced back and forth in the cell, growing anxious by the minute. Within seconds, all of the Avengers were in the room. 

“Wow, that really is a big problem,” Tony remarked, letting out a sigh and trying to determine what to do with the humongous animal. 

“We can’t just leave it here,” Peter stated, knowing he would feel guilty if they left without you. You carefully observed the boy turn his head to look at the man in a red-and-gold armor and there was a moment of silence. It looked as if the man in the armor exactly knew what the younger boy was thinking, and he immediately shook his head. “No. There’s no way in hell we’re taking this thing back to the compound.”  

“What?! Why not?” the boy argued. 

“Because, no. It’s not like a regular dog, Peter. It’s a wolf!” 

“Tony,” another man interjected, getting the attention of the whole group; the man was carrying a shield, and judging by the way everyone remained quiet, you knew he was the alpha. “Maybe we should listen to the kid, he’s got a point. We can’t just leave it here nor allow it to run free; it’d be better if we take it with us. We can figure things out later.” You narrowed your eyes at the men as you continued to listen to their bickering, and you did not like where the conversation was going. 

“I think it’s a great idea,” a man proudly stated. “It’s about time we finally got a pet.” You turned your head to look at the man, and you let out an intimidating growl, indicating to him that you deeply despised his comment. 

“Sam, stop making it mad,” a woman with red hair scolded. She rolled her eyes at Sam’s behavior and smacked him on the shoulder; you mentally thanked her, glad that at least one of them understood your reaction. You averted your attention back to the alpha, your ears pulled back and your tail pointed straight outwards, curious about what he was going to say.

“Then it’s settled. The wolf is coming with us.”

“Alright,” Tony mumbled, throwing his hands up in defeat and walking towards the exit, “but if it tries to kill you, don’t say I didn’t warn you!” Despite Peter’s excitement of convincing the team to take you in, you did not share the same enthusiasm. Instead, you were enraged. You hoped that since your enemies were either dead or gone, you would finally have the chance to run away, but of course, that wasn’t going to happen anymore. You let out a huff of frustration, irritated by their plan, however, you knew it would be best if you didn’t fight back.

Peter turned his attention back to the cell, his mask eyes staring at you; he slowly walked towards you but kept enough distance, respecting your desire to have boundaries. 

“Don’t worry,” he vowed, placing his hand on his chest. “you’re safe, you can rest now.” 

☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆

Once again, you laid on the concrete floor, but this time, everything was different. You weren’t kept in a cell that was small, unsanitary, or cold; instead, you were given a proper size, allowing you to roam around the spacious room. Although you were still confined to a location, you didn’t mind the bulletproof glass wall since it granted you to see beyond the confinement; there was a comforting heat engulfing you, and you weren’t surrounded by filth. You were alone for the time being, but you weren’t bothered by it; rather, you were oddly relaxed. Perhaps, it was due to the fact that there was an enormous window which gave you the privilege to see the beautiful skyline. Although you were still unsure of where you were, you were mesmerized by the sight; it would never compare to your home, but the buildings, cars, and powerful lights caught your attention. You limped towards the window and sat down, settling in the moonlight and continuing to stare at the small figures that moved. 

You heard footsteps approaching, but you didn’t bother to turn around; you hoped that whoever was standing there would leave soon, but as you felt their presence linger, you slowly turned your head around. Standing right in front of the glass wall was a boy who looked around his early twenties; he had dark brown hair, fair skin, and enticing brown eyes that caught your attention. There was something about him that felt familiar, but you couldn’t place it. The boy smiled at you as he held a tray of food, but you merely narrowed your eyes and decided to ignore him. 

“C’mon, I know you’re hungry,” the boy pointed out. You instantly recognized the voice from before; it was Peter, the one who was wearing the red-and-blue suit. 

He bit his lip in anticipation as you didn’t move a muscle, but he was determined to get you to eat. You let out a big huff, irritated that he did not leave. Suddenly, the sound of a door opening made you alert, and you instantly stood up, turning around to face Peter. Your ears and fur were standing up, and you crouched backward, baring your teeth. 

“Don’t worry, I’m not going to try anything,” Peter assured, placing the tray on the floor and sliding it across the room. You immediately stopped your actions and directed your focus on the food instead of him; you carefully examined the food, not knowing whether to eat it or leave it there, but you were unable to resist the delicious smell of the meat. Peter watched in awe as you quickly ate the food in seconds and licked the tray clean. The violent and capricious behavior you were once showing was completely gone and was now replaced with a relaxed demeanor; you sat like a sphinx and your tail was placed down, signaling to Peter that you were starting to trust him. As Peter began to examine your calm posture, his eyes gazed over the large gash that was on your left thigh; there was dry blood and dirt around the wound, and it looked as if there was puss leaking out. Peter needed to treat the injury as quickly as he could, but he feared that you wouldn’t allow him to. 

You nudged the tray back to Peter and licked the food that lingered around your mouth; Peter let out a slight laugh, understanding that you wanted more food. 

“I’ll be right back,” Peter affirmed, stepping out of the room to retrieve more food. You waited for Peter to return, and once he did, you couldn’t help but feel happy, content that you were interacting with someone other than the vicious men. Once again, you began to hastily swallow the food, but you were so ravenous that you failed to notice how Peter tried to discreetly look at your wound. As soon as you felt Peter place his hand on your thigh, you immediately stopped eating and snapped your mouth at him. Luckily, due to Peter’s abilities, he was able to save his fingers from being chewed off, but he stepped back. You let out a menacing growl, angry that he violated your space, and Peter felt like he was back to square one. 

“You have an injury,” Peter defended himself, “I need to treat it before it gets worse.” You growled again, not caring about the severity of your wound. What Peter doesn’t know was that it’ll heal shortly; however, judging by the burning pain you felt every time you moved your left leg, it seemed as if that wouldn’t be the case. On the other hand, you were stubborn, so you decided to ignore Peter’s words. You limped to the corner, attempting to get as far away from the boy, and you plopped onto the ground. Peter stood still, not knowing what to do; while there was a chance you were going to attack him, he didn’t want to leave you with an unattended injury. Peter walked towards you once again, causing you to become angrier by the second, but you also gave him credit; he was determined to treat your injury. You watched as the boy kneeled down, inches away from you, but you didn’t growl nor bear your teeth; instead, you intently observed his every move, watching as he took out the necessary medical tools. Your heavy and strong breathing intimidated Peter, but he also knew that you weren’t going to harm him. 

You flinched as Peter poured rubbing alcohol onto the wound, to which he quickly apologized, but then you soon found yourself letting out a sigh of relief. You continued to watch Peter as he pierced your skin with a needle, but it was over in a blink of an eye, and now he was wrapping the wound with a clean cloth. “All better,” Peter proudly declared, returning the equipment back in the kit. You gazed at him, shocked that someone was willing to help you even though you’ve been aggressive to them. 

Before Peter could react, you slowly moved towards him until your head was resting on his lap. Peter sucked in his breath as his muscles contorted, but then they smoothly eased up as he watched your chest rise and fall in a steady and tranquil motion. This was your way of thanking him, and although you did not truly know him, you felt completely safe with Peter; he had gained your trust. Peter felt a smile stretch across his face, and he gingerly placed his hand behind your ear and slowly petted you, to which you happily accepted. As Peter continued to caress your head, your eyes began to feel heavier every passing minute; slowly but then all at once, you fell asleep in his lap, but Peter didn’t mind at all. Instead, he pulled himself closer and leaned his body up against yours. 

After a few hours passed, Tony and Steve decided to stop by and see how you were doing, but when they entered the room, they were shocked at the sight in front of them. Peter blissfully slept in the confinement with the beast, but that wasn’t what frightened them. Rather, what terrified them the most was that the beast was gone and was replaced with a naked woman who peacefully rested in Peter’s arms. Tony quickly connected the dots but was still unable to believe it was actually real.

“Holy shit,” Tony remarked to Steve, “she’s a shifter.” 

Taglist: @juliebean247​

[chocojjk]

For A Moment

summary: If you knew from the start that there is no forever, will you still choose to love?

words: 8.6k

a/n: Hello friends, long time no see :( ... This is long overdue and I’m not even gonna make up any excuses because honestly I just had no time and no motivation to find time. However, with the recent events, I was finally able to finish this au and I am excited for you guys to read it! 

I tried to edit it as much as possible but my head started hurting lol

Also, this was inspired by the movie Hello, Love, Goodbye

one.

You were a busy person. Your life a constant battle between yourself and your phone alarm, ordering you of your next tasks at hand. In your world, time is important. Time is gold. But when you met him, for a moment, time just stopped. 

“Hi,” he says, giving you a sweet smile.

“Welcome to the Timebeam, what can I get you?” you reply, your customer service voice barely there, seeming as this time of the night everyone is either too drunk to notice or too happy to even care. No one comes here for a good conversation anyway, everyones only here for 3 things: get drunk, have fun, and get laid. 

Timebeam was a very popular bar in your city that you so happened to work in. Don’t get me wrong, you could care less about the alcohol that surrounds you but the job pays well and the tip is insanely crazy - people tend to be rash when they’re drunk and well, you needed the money. 

“Well, I- uhm, was hoping I could get your number,” he replies, the smile still on his face.

“No,” you shot back as quickly as his question left his mouth.

“Why not?” he asked, confusion evidently laced in his voice. You can tell that the boy in front of you wasn’t used to someone rejecting him. Typical. But if he wanted someone so bad, then he shouldn't be asking the most sober person in the room.  

���What would you need my number for?” you retorted. 

“I wanted to get to know you better, maybe take you out on a date,” he replied, this time a smirk playing on his lips. He knew you had to be the slightest bit interested if you were still talking to him. He was sure you were going to give in eventually. Besides, like a typical boy, he enjoyed a challenge. 

“I'm a very busy person “Mr.-” “Bang, Bang Chan,” he chimed in, reaching his hand out to shake yours in which you gladly accepted. I mean come on, you are still clocked in and the number one rule in customer service is to always keep your customers satisfied. 

“Nice to meet you sir, like I said, I'm a very busy person, I don't have time to get to know people, let alone go on dates with them. So I suggest you order something or find a different conquest for the night because all you're getting from me is a glass of alcohol of your choice,” you declared, finishing it off with a small smile.  

He was about to reply to you when suddenly a man came slurring in, pushing him out of the way. 

“8 sh-shots of uh.. your b-best vodka,”

“Yes sir, which table are you in?”

“Table number…uh...9 i think, i don't know just look for me,”

“Alright sir, coming right up,” you said as you busied yourself behind the counter preparing the drinks, completely forgetting about the boy that had asked for your number. You never did find any of those interesting, always telling yourself that they're too drunk to even remember their actions and 99.9% of the time, you were right. 

He observed the way you treated the customers, finding it absolutely cute how you kept a smile on your face, your voice keeping that high, cheery customer service voice. However, your eyes seem to tell a different story. A one that he wanted to know. But tonight wasn’t the night and so he made his way back to his friends. 

“So did you get her number?” Minho asked, a smirk on his lips

“Nope,” he replies honestly, a huge smile on his face.

“So why are you smiling?” Jisung asked, clearly confused as to why his best friend is plastering a huge smile on his face when he has just gotten rejected. 

“Wow, for the first time in history, someone dared to reject our brother??! I can't believe it!,” Changbin added, a little too loudly if one may ask. Clearly the boy was way too gone and so was the rest of them as they all bursted out in laughter, even Chan himself chuckled as he swigged the glass of beer, his eyes never leaving your figure. 

Their loud ruckus, however, caused you to turn in the group's direction, locking eyes with the man himself, as he nods his drink towards you, taking a sip, and giving you the same small smile that he has been giving you all night. 

two.

BEEP BEEP BEEP

“Another day, another dollar,” as spongebob would say.

You get up for the day, shutting off the little death machine that kills you a little bit inside every time it opens its mouth. You honestly should get used to that loud, damn thing as it screams at you 5 times a day, each ring signaling your next task at hand.

Being a part time college student and also working two jobs isn't as easy as people make it seem to be. On top of that, your family relies on you for financial support. Their business crashing has laid a huge weight on top of your shoulders. Before you only used to worry about paying for your education but now there’s just piles and piles of loans being thrown at you.  

You really didn't have any other time to sneak in a date here or there - maybe after your shift in the bar but even that doesn’t end until 1 in the morning and by that time you're way too exhausted to do anything.

Besides, with your family relying on you, it's not like you can just drop everything. At least not until for the next 5 months, when you will finally be relocated to Canada to start your on the job training, working as a [insert your dream job.] The job that you actually desired. The job that you’ve been working so hard for and the job that pays so well that it will finally get your family out of the debt you owe. When that time comes you will finally be able to leave this hellhole of a place that you’ve been calling your home for the past 2 years.

In 5 months, you’ll finally live the way you want. The way you dreamed.

You just gotta get through another day until that day finally comes. 

I’m sure you don't want to keep hearing about how much work you have to get done so let's fast forward, shall we?

“Hi,” he says, giving you a sweet smile.

“It’s you again,” you deadpanned, not having any time for the games he came here to play.

At this he let out a small laugh before cheerfully replying with, “what happened to ‘Welcome to Timebeam, what can I get you?’” mocking your voice from the night before, clearly teasing you.

With a sigh, you rolled your eyes before letting out a, “Welcome to Timebeam, what can I get you?” as you plastered the fakest smile you could ever give. He clearly found this amusing as his laughter rang loudly around the room, you swear it was even louder than the music that everyone was dancing to. Unexpectedly, you found yourself laughing along with him, causing him to stop and stare at you, a smile playing on his lips.

“Have a drink with me?” he pleaded

“Can’t drink on the job,” you replied like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

“Technically...you're not on the job anymore… it's 1 pm,” he points out, flashing you a smile

“And how would YOU know that?” you questioned, one eyebrow going up, hands crossed against your chest.

“Believe it or not i'm a very observant person, I noticed how you left right when the clock struck 1 last night,” he states proudly

“Oh so you're stalking me,” you challenged him, this time a smirk making its way onto your face making him laugh.

“Have a drink with me.” he ordered, obviously not asking anymore.

“Will you finally leave me alone if I do?”

And maybe it was the alcohol, or maybe it was the way that you’ve been missing the feeling of another body against yours but the next thing you know you find yourself walking into a motel room, your hands tangled in his hair, the taste of the bitter whiskey that you guys drowned evident on his plumped lips that were working its way against yours, pieces of clothing disappearing all over the room.

As things continue to get heated, you start tracing kisses from his neck, making your way down. However, in the midst of it all, before you got too lost in the feeling that he was giving you, you broke down. Chan stares at the wall ahead, the romantic mood in the air quickly disappearing as soon as he hears your cries. Honestly, he has no idea what to do. This was definitely one of the most awkward hookups he has ever encountered. Was he supposed to hug you? comfort you? Because let's be real here, he definitely did not come for that. As you regain your composure, you utter a soft, “sorry,” before putting your shirt back on and running out of there ashamed, leaving Chan half naked and confused to the scene that unfolded before him.

After a couple of minutes of composing himself, he walks back out into the busy city of Seoul, not expecting to see you sitting on the bench outside of the building, looking out at the lake that surrounds it. For a second, the city seemed to stop, the sound of the bustling cars and busy people all being drawn out as he takes a good look at you, your features being etched onto his mind.

What was it about you?

He can't seem to figure it out but he did know that you looked sad, and he never leaves a hook up without the girl feeling satisfied. So maybe it wasn't in the way he intended, but he will make you feel good.

three.

“So tell me, did I smell THAT bad that it led you to cry?” he jokes, trying to get you to laugh yet all he received was a stoic stare.

You felt him take a seat beside you, the cold air slightly getting warmer. “You know the drill right? None of the things that happened back there was real. It was just a spur of the moment thing and we’ll both go back to living our lives th-”

“Wait, wait, wait, what exactly happened back there?” he says his eyebrows raised, a cheeky smile on his lips

“I'm just saying that none of those feelings were real.”

“Trust me, I didn't have feelings there…but you..you seemed to have a lot,” he says teasingly, obviously hinting at the way you just cried and ran. You ignored it though, not really in the mood to talk about the scene that just took place as you were embarrassed enough and so you put on your strong front like you always do.

“Good. Because I’m telling you now that I’m not interested. And whatever happened will never happen again. So you can leave me alone now and move on to your next girl.”

“W-ow,” he says, holding a hand to his heart before letting out a laugh. “So this is how it feels…” he pondered out loud.

You give him a look, seeming to say, ‘how does what feel?’

“You see, I’ve just never been on this side before. I’m usually the one who pushes the girls away, the one who breaks it off. You know...this actually hurts a bit.” he states.

‘Psh of course he was,’ you thought to yourself. The boy's cocky behavior was evident from the start so of course his pride would hurt a bit now that he has been rejected but you remained from making any comments. You let the silence wash over the two of you, the only sound coming were from the small waves the lake was creating. For some reason, him just sitting next to you made you feel a little less lonely and so you basked in this moment of peace before it ended.

“You know...if you want...you can talk to me about it,” he says, finally breaking off the silence.

“What makes you think I would talk about my feelings to a complete stranger?” you shot back, really not understanding what the boy had in mind.

“Well you see, that's the beauty of it,” he says like it was the most obvious thing in the world. Sensing that you still weren't convinced, he continued, “i’m a complete stranger, right?”

“Right.” you deadpanly replied

“Which means at the end of the day, my thoughts and my opinions don't matter to you... which  also means you can open up to me because, well...one, i wont judge and two, even if i did, why would you even care what i think?... since i'm a stranger and all,” he explains, urging you to start sharing.

You stare at him for a bit, thinking to yourself if it was a smart idea to go along with what the boy has said.

“...or you can just keep staring at me like that, i don't mind it at all,” he says with a cheeky smile on his face as he turns to you. However you didn't look away, instead you examined his face even more, noticing the dimples that were coming out to play and the way that his eyes seem to smile along with his lips. He was definitely the type of man you’d fall for and if things weren’t how they were now, then maybe you would allow yourself to fall. Finally, straying your eyes off of him, you look back into the ocean.

“I’m just so tired..i-i want to have control. For once in my life, I want to live my life for myself and not for anyone else,” you mumbled.

He had a point. He is no one to you, just a stranger - a stranger that you would never have to talk to again. So why should you care how you look, why should you care enough to act strong?

And so you exploded, “I'm tired of always acting strong for everyone. I’m tired of pretending I’m fine with what's happening in my life. I’m tired of being compared to the people around me, reminding me that I’m not even nowhere close to where I want to be...i just..i just want to be happy,” all the feelings that you’ve kept to yourself finally tumbling out. Your tears flowing freely down your cheeks but you could care less. It felt good to finally say those words out loud. It might seem silly but just saying it out loud felt like a huge weight was taken off your shoulders.

He listens to your rant, wondering to himself how this broken girl in front of him still seems to be the most beautiful one he’s seen. The way your tears started falling, making your eyes glassy and your nose starting to get that hint of the color red… it was all beautiful to him. But the most beautiful of all were your words and the way you spoke. Out of all the strangers out there, he was the one lucky enough to be given the chance to meet you. The real you. No fake smiles, no cheery voice, just the painful words that finally matched the eyes he first met with.

After your long awaited confessions, he let the silence take over for a second before saying, “I want to have my own music studio,” he says, looking out at the ocean. “I want people to look at me and take me seriously…I want to show my dad how successful I can be without his help and his money,” he continues.

You realize now that opening up to him was one of the best things you could do. Because just like what he said, he didn’t judge you, hell, he didn’t even state his opinion. He just let you say what you were feeling...nothing more, nothing less.

He then stood up, standing on the ledge that separates him and the lake, raising his arms up like he was about to fly, he yelled out a loud, “I want to be happy!!!” and you swear the whole entire city could hear him but you could not have cared any less as your feet started making their way towards him, joining him on the ledge, as both of you started yelling out your wishes.

“Let’s work towards our dreams, yeah?” he says, turning to look at you, his eyes beady yet beautiful. It was like looking at the skies filled with twinkling stars, and his smile - wide and evident and all you could do was nod and mirror his expression.

four.

After some time, you guys finally got tired of screaming into the cold air. Sitting side by side on the ledge, you start a new conversation with him. After all, you guys are just strangers, it wouldn’t hurt you to know a little more about the guy in front of you.

“Have you ever been in love, Chan?” you ask, catching him off guard. He wasn’t expecting you to ask him any questions, hell, he wasn’t even expecting you to say goodbye. He thought you were just gonna get up, leave, and continue your life without acknowledging the scene that just happened.

“Why do you ask?” he replies, curious as to why you were suddenly interested in him.

“You just don’t seem like the type,” you answered honestly. Chan scoffs at this and you suddenly feel bad for asking but before you could apologize, he replied, “of course i’ve been in love, i am still human after all”

“What happened?” you ask. In a way, you're not quite sure why you kept asking him questions you're not that interested in knowing the answers to. All you know is that you don't want this night to end quite yet.

“I told her I loved her,” he expressed, his eyes immediately finding interest in his jeans as his fingers started to fiddle with the watch that seemed to be made specifically for his wrist.

“and then what happened?” you wondered what could possibly happen to turn Chan into the playboy that he seemed to be.

“Thats what happened,” he countered “I told her i loved her and she got scared and left, told me that she wasn’t expecting that to happen…i-i didn't know that that's how easy it was to scare a girl away, but now I do,” he says snickering. 

“It's my party trick now, if i know i'm not interested, all i have to say is ‘i love you’,” he concluded, finishing his rambling.

“I love you.” you replied quickly, hoping that this will finally make him walk away and end this night because you couldn't find the courage to do so.

Upon hearing your words, he lets out a small giggle, “I’m sorry but…I don’t love you. I'm staying right here.”

five.

It’s been two weeks since that night and you haven’t seen the stranger that made such an impact on you. In the two weeks that have gone, you sometimes find yourself walking home through the path that passes the bench, hoping to even get the smallest glance of him. However, much to your dismay, you were always greeted with an empty bench, cold air nipping at your skin and the boy nowhere to be seen.

His friends were here though. Seated at their usual table, you go up to them as soon as you clock out, “Hi, I was wondering if you guys have seen Chan around?”

They all snicker at the sound of his name stumbling out of your lips and you immediately regret even asking in the first place until a voice coming from behind you breaks your thoughts, “hey stranger,” he says, his soft honey voice filling your ears and calming you down, the same way they did two weeks ago. As you turn to face him, you notice the same dimpled smile he was wearing, something that you didn’t realize you've missed seeing until now. You utter out a small, “hi,” as you slowly walk towards him.

He notices that you were out of your work clothes, your jacket in hand, “you wanna get out of here?” he asks quietly, for only the two of you to hear. All you could do was let out a small nod as he took his hands in yours. Pulling the two of you out of the bar, he waves to his group of friends to signal that he was leaving as his friends' cheers slowly diminished with every step. Chan never told them what happened that night so they assumed that you were just back for a second round with Mr. Bang, as they like to call him when he’s out doing his thing.

You guys ended up at a ramen place a couple of blocks down the bar. This part of Seoul is always alive so it didn’t take long for the two of you to find a place to settle in.

“So… why were you looking for me?”

He asked the question that you hoped you didn’t have to answer because frankly, you don’t even know the answer either.

The reason why you opened up to him in the first place was because he was a stranger to you. You never expected to be here, at 1:30 in the morning, eating a bowl of noodles and ruining your schedule for the brown-eyed, curly-headed man seated in front of you. If you were to be completely honest with yourself at this moment, you would say it was worth it. Instead however, you inhaled the ramen in front of you, choosing not to answer the question he laid out.

Chan, on the other hand, couldn’t help but let out a small smile. He could feel how flustered you were with him catching you red handed, asking his friends about him. Though you chose to ignore his question, he couldn’t be happier that he was given another moment to be with you and so he ate his ramen in silence, only the sounds of the busy streets can be heard around the two of you.

“I realized I never got the chance to thank you,” you say as soon as the last bit of noodle disappeared into your mouth.

“Thank me for what?” he says, eyebrows raised.

“Well, two weeks ago, a boy went up to me at the bar expecting to score but instead had to listen to me talk about all my problems,” you say, smiling sheepishly. “I want to thank that boy for letting me express my thoughts and not judging me for a single one,” you continue, your eyes avoiding contact with his. You aren’t the type to be so upfront with your feelings, usually choosing to bottle it all up, so saying all these things out loud were quite hard for you.

“I think the boy would say you’re welcome and that if you ever need another night like that then all you need to do is exchange numbers with him so you can easily reach him whenever you want,” he says, his small smile coming out to play.

“Is that your way of asking me for my number?” you teased

“maybe,” he replies, letting out a small smirk as he hands you his phone.

After inputting your number into his phone, you looked up at him, “i love you,” you say jokingly.

Chan, quickly remembering what you are referring to, replied with a “sorry, i still don't love you,” and all you could do was let out a laugh.

He quickly joins you, your guys’ laughter mixing in with the sound of the busy streets and Chan swears that he’s never heard anything more beautiful.

six.

‘Where are you right now?’

A text on your phone read, coming from the one and only Bang Chan.

‘At home, why?’

‘I got you coffee :)’

Your heart stops a beat. Something that you find has been frequently happening ever since Chan stopped being a stranger. Ever since that night, you and Chan have been texting non-stop. However, you’re very much aware that this could never develop into something more than it is now as the days you had left in this city were starting to diminish and Chan knew that as well. You told him about it through text one night. Explaining to him that once you’re done with school, you would be making your way to Canada to finally start the life that you’ve been dreaming of.

At first, Chan was angry at the world for letting him meet you just to take you away a couple months after. However, he never let it be known to you as he acted nonchalant, like the information you spread out to him didn’t just hurt him. He contemplated whether or not he should allow himself to get more attached, but after a day of not talking to you he realized that he already was. Which brings us to now with Chan standing outside of your apartment, choosing to sacrifice his whole heart out on the line just so he can still be with you. After all, you guys don't have forever.

Quickly glancing out your apartment window, there he was, a black beanie on his head paired with his regular black hoodie and jeans, your cup of coffee sitting right in between his hands, the only thing that's providing him any source of warmth in the cold air. You made your way out of your room as quickly as possible so that you could finally let him in.

“Thank you so much, you’re a lifesaver,” you say as you take a sip from the cup of coffee that he handed to you.

“Still stressed about the big test, huh?” he commented, taking a seat on your bed that was right next to your study table.

“Yeah, I just can't seem to understand this topic,” you replied, letting out a frustrated sigh, “like, I’ve read it over and over again and it's just so… so complicated!... my professor never went over this in class so i don't understand why it's even on the test to begin with,” you cursed, a frown making its way upon your face.

“Let me take a look at it,” Chan extends his hands out, reaching for your notebook as you give him a questioning look.

“Ok y/n, im smarter than I look,” he scoffs as you put your hands up in defense, “i didn't say anything!”

“You didn’t have to, your face says it all,” he bickered as you uttered out a soft sorry and slumped down on your chair, choosing to focus on the coffee cup instead while Chan read your notes.

“Oh this is easy! I could teach you!” he exclaimed as your eyes almost popped out of their sockets.

“Are you serious!? Chan please tell me you're not joking, you're literally my last hope!” you say dramatically, quickly rushing to his side so that he can finally start explaining to you the topic that you've been trying to make sense of for the past 3 hours.

1 hr later

“... and that’s how you do it,” he declared.

“holy shit, you’re amazing,” you say excitedly, “i cannot believe i've spent so much time on this for it to be that simple! ugh! I love you!,” you continue, the buzz from the coffee and the happiness from finally understanding something that has left you puzzled for hours letting you feel like you're on cloud nine.

Too caught up in your feelings of accomplishment, you didn’t even notice the way Chan didn't retort with his famous, “i don't love you,” line but instead was looking at you like you held all the stars in the world in your fingertips.

seven.

“You’re texting y/n again huh?” Felix chimes in as he walks into the apartment that he shared with Chan and Minho.

“How’d you know?” Chan asked, a puzzled expression on his face.

“You’re literally grinning like a child on christmas day,” Minho teases, the smirk on his lips getting wider with every second.

“Man, you’re whipped,” Felix jokes as he and Minho erupted into a series of laughter, never expecting this day to come especially with the reputation that Chan had.

“But bro, let me remind you that y/n is leaving soon,” Minho points out, his responsible side kicking in. They’re very much aware of the situation at hand and he knows that once you leave then they’ll be the ones to have to pick up the pieces. That was something that none of the boys were looking forward to. They’ve all seen Chan at his worst, all experiencing the day Chan fell in love for the first time and was left broken hearted, morphing into the playboy that he is, or was, until he met you. It felt like a repeat of history to them. As much as they wanted to like you they couldn’t allow themselves to get attached to you the way that Chan already has. However, they still supported the two of you and whatever the hell your guys’ relationship was. The both of you chose not to put any type of label on it as there would honestly be no use since you were eventually going to leave.

“What if...what if I can show her that she doesn’t need to move away to be successful?” Chan wondered. Actually he’s been thinking about it for a few days now.

“And how exactly are you gonna do that?” Felix questioned curiosity getting the best of him. As much as possible he wants to help his friend, who is practically like a brother to him. If there was any way to get you to stay then he would very much contribute to the plan.

On the other hand, Minho was more of a realist, “She’s been wanting to leave years before she even met you, you think a boy would change that decision for her?”

See, in this whole situation Felix and Minho were like the devil and angel on Chan’s shoulders. One was always a ray of light, allowing him to have hope while the other was always harsh and truthful, reminding him of reality. You can choose who’s playing the part.

“I just- maybe...maybe if i show her that she can have everything that she's been dreaming of here, then she’ll stay,” Chan continues, “I can make things easier for her like bringing her food when she needs it, i’ll help her find a better job so she doesn’t have to strain herself all the time, hell, if that’s not enough, I’ll even reach out to my dad if I have to.”

Chan and his father’s relationship was an iffy one. They used to be close until Chan decided that he would be pursuing music instead of the law career that his dad has been trying to implement on him ever since he was young. Obviously, it didn’t end well for the pair. His dad’s pride was crushed as he was always gloating about how his eldest son would be taking over the firm soon. Eventually the atmosphere in the house became so thick that Chan decided to move out, only meeting up with them during the holidays. 

But for you, he’s willing to move past that. He was willing to give up his dignity if it meant a forever with you was possible. He felt like he finally found the missing piece in his life and the thought of having to let it go without even putting up a fight just doesn’t sit right with him. Chan was desperate and as soon as the other boys heard his proposition, they immediately knew how important you actually were to him.

“I think it could work,” Felix exclaims, cracking a smile out of Chan however it was short lived as Minho followed shortly after, “but is that what she wants?”

eight.

2 months. That’s the remaining time he had with you. Chan felt like he was in the fourth stage of the Kubler-Ross grief cycle even though he hasn’t even lost you. From the day you met at the bar to now, the past 3 months of his life have been the most thrilling and heart racing moments he has ever had. Laughing with you, eating with you, just being with you is always the best part of his day. 

Lately it’s been harder for the two of you to meet up though as Chan was busy with his music career. After multiple days of you ordering the DJ in Timebeam to play Chan’s music, a producer finally took interest in the music he has been making and gave him a chance to work with them.

Even though this meant taking up the time that you two had together, you couldn’t be prouder. After countless nights of deep talks with him, you knew that this was his dream. You supported him from a distance and listened to him talk about the experience every night, his voice becoming your daily lullaby. For Chan, it was a sign from the universe. Something that was telling him that if he really lands this as his permanent job then he will be able to help you financially, meaning that you didn’t have to go.

You were staying in his apartment for the night as you missed the presence of the boy so you decided to just do all your studying there. What was that phrase? Killing two birds with one stone.

“Dinners ready,” he says, popping his head in calmly so as to not disrupt you. “Ok, i'll be there in a sec,” you acknowledged as you finish the last bit of your essay. Honestly, you thought that you were just going to end netflix and chilling with Chan so you pat yourself in the back, feeling proud that you actually accomplished the assignment that you had to do.

Eventually you take the seat in front of Chan, ready to dig into the spaghetti that he has prepared but before you could even transfer some to your plate, he stops you, “nu-uh wait,” he says, lightly smacking your hand away from the plate, leaving you with a pout. He laughs at you before placing a soft kiss upon your rosy lips, giving you a feeling that you just can’t seem to get over and then heading to the fridge to grab the bottle of wine that he was cooling. It was just you and Chan tonight, the other boys going out to Timebeam, as usual.

“What's up with the fancy wine?” you say teasingly, “are you trying to get into my pants because i'm pretty sure that already happened,” you conclude, emitting a laugh from the both of you.

“Well…I got the job and I wanted to celebrate a little,” he beamed, his smile widening with every second.

“oh my god?!! That's amazing!!” you cheered, immediately jumping up to give him the biggest hug your tiny frame could muster.

“I couldn’t have done it without you,” he expressed as you kissed him all over, your heart bursting of happiness for the boy in front of you. He did it. He is finally going to be able to live out his dream.

“We should probably eat now before the spaghetti gets cold,” he says in chuckles as you kiss him once more on the lips before going back to your seats. The two of you talk about your days as you guys ate, really savoring this heartfelt moment.

“So I was thinking,” Chan hesitated, “what if you don’t move to Canada?”

And with that one small sentence, the light hearted air suddenly turned thick. Slowly placing your fork down, you stare at the black shirt Chan was wearing, trying to process the words that just came out of his mouth.

“wh-what?” you say, your voice faltering.

“I did it y/n… I got the job, i-i can help you and your family, i-”

“When did I say yes to that?” you ask sternly. The cheerful mood completely diminishing into thin air.

“Well, you don’t have to say yes, I’ll do it for you in a heartbeat-” the boy says, his heart completely filled with pure intentions but you were furious.

“You don’t get to decide things for me, Chan.”

“please, y/n,” he begged as he cautiously reached out for your hand however you removed it off the table as soon as you noticed, your eyes still refusing his gaze.

“y/n I love you, I did all this for us,” Chan continues, noticing that he is now speaking to the girl that he met that night. He was not going to let you shut all your emotions down. You, on the other hand, recognizes the effect that the boy had in you and you knew that once you stared at those brown eyes of his then you were done for - you’d give up everything and you could not be that weak. Not after everything you’ve gone through to get to where you are.

“If you love me then why are you making me choose?” you questioned, unsure of how to feel at the moment.

“y/n please.. if you love me then choosing wouldn’t be so hard!” he retaliated, the tears he has been desperately trying to hold back finally falling.

“I never said I did.” you gulped, regretting the words as soon as they left your mouth.

nine.

It’s been a week since that dreadful conversation yet nothing can get Chan to leave the couch. Sitting there dumbfoundedly, your words felt like a gunshot to his heart and he can’t believe he let himself fall in love again after swearing it off the first time. He needed a drink. Anything to stop the words that just seem to keep replaying in his head. Staggering over to the kitchen, he easily spots the last bottle of beer in the back of the fridge but before he could take a nice long swig, it was being taken away from him.

“Dude what the fuck?!”

“How long are you gonna do this for?” deadpanned Minho as Chan let out a frustrated groan, “Can’t you just leave me alone? You don’t understand how I feel Minho, you’ve never been in love!” he scoffed, yanking the bottle out of Minho's grip.

Minho didn’t let this get to him. Unlike Felix, Minho wasn’t afraid of Chan and had no problem with putting Chan back into his place, so he grabbed the bottle of beer and smashed it down the ground.

“Dude are you fucking serious right now?! That was the last one!” Chan yells frustratingly before pushing Minho away from his sight, a lot rougher than he would if he soberly knew what he was doing.

“Am I serious?? Am I fucking serious?!” Minho snaps, finally reaching his breaking point.  

“It’s 10:30 in the morning Chan! You’ve been drinking all week! You haven’t showed up to any of your meetings and we’ve all been making excuses for you!! You already lost the girl are you gonna fucking lose your dream job too!” Minho fumed. He hated the fact that it has come to this but he hated seeing his best friend lose himself more. 

So yeah, he’ll play the villain in Chan’s eyes for a while but that's only because he truly cares for him.

“You really thought she was just gonna drop everything for you, huh,” he scoffs, “Wake up call Chan!  you knew from the beginning she wasn't that type of girl so stop acting pathetic because we don’t feel bad for you.”

“You’ll move on. You’ve done it before. Just don’t take too long this time before you lose everything else,” he finishes before storming out of the apartment, the door slamming loudly as Chan finds himself back into what seemed to be his favorite place of the week - the couch.

“He’s right you know,” Felix says softly after hearing the commotion through his room. Picking up the pieces of glass that have shattered across the floor and cleaning up the mess that his older brothers have created, Chan sighs, a headache starting to form “Felix, I don’t need this from you right now too.”

“Hyung, i'm just saying...you did know the situation at hand before you even entered it,” Felix mumbled as carefully as possible.

“What do you think I should do?” Chan muttered, finally giving into the words that were being said.

“Honestly, I think you should talk to y/n” Felix admitted. With the mention of your name, Chan sits up, his attention solely focused on the younger boy in front of him, “you love her, right?” Felix questions.

“Yeah, but that's not the problem-”

“Hyung, let me talk first,” Felix sheepishly smiles, lowkey scared that Chan would burst again if he pushed his limits.

“S-sorry, yeah… go on,” Chan nodded, urging for him to speak.

“Well, how I see it, you took the risk of loving her even though you knew there was a timer that was going to go off as soon as these 5 months are over. You’ve already made it to the fourth month. What's one month more?” Felix reckoned.

“So you’re saying, I should go back to her?” Chan questioned, confused as to why Felix would suggest it when he thought that they wanted him to move on from her.

“Not go back to her but maybe fix it, she only has one month left, and you’ve created this out to be the perfect relationship… you don’t want to look back at this moment and think what could have happened in the last month,” Felix states, giving Chan a small smile before wiping off the spilled beer and making his way back into his room, leaving Chan to himself.

After a couple of minutes of just thinking to himself, Chan finally gains the courage to pick up his phone and text you.

‘Meet me at the place I first met you tonight after your shift... please.’

ten.

The place he first met you. You figured it was at the Timebeam and so you waited, keeping an eye on his usual table so that you could easily notice once he made his way here. 

After waiting 30 minutes, the boy is nowhere to be seen, leading you to wonder if this was all some sort of sick joke. A way to get back at you for hurting him the way you did but that part of you that loves him won’t let you think of him in such a malicious way and so with your head drooped down, you ventured out of the crowdy club and into the streets of Seoul, pushing away all the thoughts of the curly-headed boy.  

You were starting to have doubts. Seoul was what you were familiar with and in 30 days time you’re gonna have to leave the place you’ve grown accustomed to. 

Who am I kidding? 

You’ve been waiting to leave this place as soon as you got here. You were having these second thoughts because you wished for a different ending. One where Chan doesn’t hate your guts. Maybe one that ends as perfectly as it started.

And then it hits you. The place he first met you.

You ran. You ran as fast as your legs could take you and there he was - sitting on the same bench, looking out at the shining lake, his hands being kept warm by the pockets of his hoodie. Suddenly the busy streets of Seoul didn’t seem to be as busy anymore. 

You walk towards him slowly, engraving his features into your mind, taking a mental picture. Chan was a sight to see and you didn’t want to forget it when you’re 5,000 miles away. Carefully, you take the seat beside him, he doesn’t spare you a glance and you were too ashamed to look at him but you do hear the sigh that comes out of his lips.

Chan finally lets out the breath he’s been holding as soon as he felt your warm body take the seat next to him. After waiting for almost an hour, he was terrified that you were never going to show up and that he wouldn't have a chance to fix the mess he has created. But now he was anxious because he didn’t really think of what he was going to say and you’re here, sitting beside him, the smell of your perfume intoxicating him with every second that passes. Instead of accidentally blurting out something stupid, he stays still, not even sparing you a glance in order to compose his thoughts until you broke them.

“I love you,” you confessed.

Chan chuckles, still looking out at the lake, “are you saying that because you want the bench all to yourself?” he jokes, trying to lighten the air but you weren’t in the mood for any jokes. Facing him, you gather all the confidence that you could muster up, “No. I love you,” you confessed for the second time and Chan couldn’t help but let a tear fall from his eyes as he smiled a gentle smile.

“Thank you,” he says sniffling, finally facing you as you slowly wipe his tears away.

“I’m sorry for what I said, I don't know why I said it...i-,” you blabbered, trying to comfort him.

“That’s okay,” Chan says, cutting you off, “I know why,” he says, a sad tone laced within his voice, “it’s for your dream,” he finishes, shooting you a warm smile. You mirror his expression, glad that he knows that you didn’t actually mean what you said that night.

“I actually have to be the one saying sorry,” he starts, “it wasn’t fair of me to ask you to choose...im sorry y/n,” he says apologetically and all you wanted to do was bury yourself into the crook of his neck and never let go.

Instead you grabbed his hand, lacing it with yours. The feeling of his hands enveloping yours like before felt like home.

“I’m scared,” you say, your voice barely above a whisper, tears threatening to spill from your eyes. Chan grips onto your hand tighter, letting you know that he was there and he will always be there for as long as you let him.

eleven.

Waking up to the sounds of the birds chirping instead of your alarm blaring was truly a phenomenal feeling. It’s your last week and having just resigned from your jobs, you had all the time to yourself. Well…yourself and Chan. You promised him that you were all his this week, something that he asked from you a week before.

“Hey, there’s something I wanted to propose to you,” he says one night as he was walking you home from work.

“Hmm, what is it?”

Getting down on one knee, your eyes widen in shock but quickly regain your composure when you see him pulling nothing but a finger heart from his pocket, “Will you spend your last week in Seoul with me?”

As you think back to that night you never noticed how fast the time came. That fear in the back of your head tends to resurface time and time again however you always had Chan to remind you that you were strong enough for the journey that lies ahead. It’s crazy to think that you won't have that luxury a week from now.

“hmm, what are you thinking about?” a groggily Chan asks from right next to you,

“Just how much I love waking up with you next to me,” you say teasingly. 

A smile immediately emerges upon his face as he grabs you close to him, settling his face on the crook of your neck, his arms wrapping around you.

“I have a lot planned for this week,” he mutters, badly trying to shake the sleep away but with you right beside him, he couldn’t help but fall into a deeper slumber.

“I can’t wait,” you yawned, following him shortly after.

twelve.

Namsan Seoul Tower - the last place on Chan’s list. 

Two days before your flight. 

This week was just filled with Chan taking you to places you have never been before and you realized how beautiful South Korea was when it didn’t deal with you having to take care of drunk people and/or arguing with your professors. 

You’ve gained so much more love for this country in the short amount of time you were with Chan than the two years you’ve actually stayed here. It sucked that you never got the chance to explore the place earlier but you were glad that Chan was the one to be able to show you the wonders that it truly holds.

“Baby which lock color do you want?” he asks as you guys find a lock to purchase.

“The black one is nice,” you say, “we could write on it using white marker, I think it’ll stand out more,” you added as Chan immediately picked up the items and paid for them.

As you guys make your way to where the bridge was, you noticed how many couples there were at this place. Everyone has a hand to hold on to, different laughters filling the air and you love the way that Chan and you seem to fit right into the equation. With his fingers in between yours, you look up at him, memorizing every detail.

“We’re here,” he says as you grab the lock from his hand, writing out the words:

“C + (y.in) forever”

Ironic, the word forever.

But who knows? maybe somewhere down the road, forever is for the two of you.

Chan wraps his arms from behind you as you both look at the scenic view ahead. “I’ll always love you,” you say for only him to hear and he muffles back a tear before mimicking your words.

“I’ll always love you too.”

thirteen.

“Chan, thank you,” you say as you guys sat on your favorite bench, enjoying the last night you had together.

“For what?” he says, his thumb slowly grazing over your hands providing the comfort that you were so used to.

“For letting me live my dream.”

fourteen.

Chan dropped you off at the airport. Saying goodbye was the hardest thing you could do, clinging onto him and inhaling every memory of him with you.

Nonetheless, as soon as they called your flight, you left - not even sparing a single glance back. Chan didn’t expect any less though, in fact he hoped that you won’t look back because if you did then he probably would have never let you go.

Chan will always be etched into your mind as the boy who loved you and let you be you and you can’t thank him enough.

fifteen.

3 years later

Looking back at your life in Seoul, you don't even remember the blaring alarms and the loud drunks that you had to deal with on the daily. Instead, memories that include holding a hand and sharing a laugh - memories that lasted only for a moment, were the ones that you remember most.

(a/n): If you’re reading this then thank you so much for reading all the way through! I hope you guys had as much fun reading it than i did writing it. feedback are always welcomed!!! i might not respond to all of them but i do see all the comments and they always make me smile :)  

(the only reason i don’t respond is because my main tumblr blog shows up and shes kinda ugly lolol - but you guys can drop stuff off in my asks and ill make sure to reply there)

again, thank you for reading!!! <3