#I would like to personally like to thank the artist of this album cover

[epickiya722]

HE IS SO PRETTY?! LIKE, THIS IS SO UNREAL TO ME, HELLO?! MY SUNSHINE!! 😭💖

[jarofstyles]

Put Your Records On

This is a little thing I came up with at 2 am and kept writing till 5 lol. It's pop star y/n x rock star H. I don't do a lot of canon H and some things are changed/ don't fit into the real one but that's on purpose. Part two will be up very soon!

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WC- 4.2k

Warnings- dirty talk, mention of bullying (Brief)

She saw him from across the room- well, more like felt him. The room had a buzz in it that it hadn’t before.

It was common knowledge that he was going to be there. One of his best friends was hosting the after party for the BRIT awards, and she had been lucky enough to be invited considering her manager had been friends with the group for a while. Actually, it was a bit shocking that she’d never met the man considering how close their circles ran. She’d met a lot of his management and production team, even a few members of his band- but never the man himself. 

It was her second year after making it big on the music scene but her entire life, she’d been working towards this. School musicals, voice lessons, guitar and piano lessons, music had become her flesh and blood and she was determined to make it her bread and fucking butter. She’d been blessed with her voice and a talent like hers wasn’t one to waste, that’s what her parents had said as she grew up- and it had all paid off. She went home with Best New Artist and was coming down on the buzzing high of another huge accomplishment of her career. 

Harry was infamous, at the top of the damn world and everyone knew his name. He was just about to hop back on tour, one Y/N had been invited to attend by his manager himself. It seemed like today was the day they would finally meet in person, and judging by the recognition in his eye, he had heard about her too. 

God, that made her want to vomit. Growing up she’d been a casual fan of his band, been to a few shows even after scraping together enough money for a ticket along with her best friend. Said friend was lost somewhere in the room and Y/N knew she had a knack for awful timing, but as the man got closer to her she felt her insides begin to bubble. She wasn’t one to get starstruck super easily, thank god, but it was hard not to feel intimidated as he approached her. A black blazer with a very sheer pink blouse underneath, pants tight on the thighs and flared at the calves, necklaces hanging in a thatch of thin chest hair, she’d felt her mouth dry as his smile was given directly to her. Someone she’d grown up singing to in her bedroom, right into her hairbrush, was grinning at her like she was someone important. 

“So we finally meet.” Harry reached his hand out to shake hers. Clunky rings covered the digits as her own took them, shaking his warm hand with her own smile on her face. She’d been on stage in front of tens of thousands of people, and yet he was a bit more intimidating. Still she was going to do her best to use her brief acting skills and pretend her heart wasn’t in her throat. “I’ve heard so much about you- your album’s fucking brilliant.”

He was tipsy, she could see that much. His eyes were slightly hooded and he had a looser demeanor than he had seated at the table ahead of her at the awards show. Good for him. It wasn’t likely that he did this too much. It was well known that he wasn’t much for drinking during his working season and he’d won two awards! That called for drinks all around. 

What took her off guard, though, was the fact that he’d listened to her album. He listened and he had said it was good? Her cheeks heated as she realized he was still holding her hand, gently letting it fall as he took a step closer. It was a little loud out there but not too bad if you were close enough. “You think so? I’m hoping it’s all good things.” She let out a laugh she hoped sounded natural, adjusting her hair. The girl had always been one to fuss with her clothes when she was nervous but hopefully he didn’t realize that. “So is yours. Got quite a few on my playlists.” 

“Yeah?” His smile grew bigger. “Which ones?” Y/N felt the lump in her throat as she tried not to think about how good he smelled. It was so creepy, noticing that. There was a faint hint of tobacco and the tiniest bit of alcohol, but he smelled really warm. Cuddly, in a way. It made sense in her brain, but she was also a drink in at this point. 

“Mmm, I have a few from other albums but from the latest? Satellite, that’s the go to for the gym for me… Late Night Talking, very relatable for me. Erm… Boyfriends, unfortunately.” She saw him give a playful wince. “Yeah, men are shit- no offence. And then I’d say Daydreaming is a personal favorite. As It Was was brilliant, obviously, but Daydreaming is my favorite.” It felt like maybe she word-vomited a little but he’d listened to every word, seeming pleased with her answers. 

“Daydreaming isn’t one I hear of being a favorite, usually. M’chuffed that it’s yours.” He genuinely seemed happy about it. “I really liked the closing track of your album- it’s so rare to find albums that tell a story, that are thoughtfully laid out, at least at this point in time. I love to listen from front to back and it was laid out perfectly. Usually m’a bit of a snob and would have some critiques but you nailed it.” 

Y/N preened. It wasn’t a compliment she got often and it shocked her because that meant he’d really listened. Really paid attention to her music and took time with her album. It was extremely flattering. Surreal, really. Who could have told 15 year old Y/N that Harry would be a fan of her fucking music? She’d probably pass the fuck out. “I’m shocked you got that, but thank you. Yeah, I did the same thing growing up. It was my favorite part of music I’d find, seeing how stuff flowed together. Top to bottom and then bottom to top, then I can shuffle.” It was said in a slightly joking tone but she was fully serious. 

“You get it, Y/N.” He reached out to nudge her shoulder. “I’ve been trying to meet you for a bit but my schedule’s been hectic. Thought it wouldn’t be since we’ve been going for a bit now but tour prep… can be brutal, y’know?” 

Y/N did know, but on a minuscule scale compared to what his tour probably entailed. He was doing stadiums, for god’s sake! Y/N’s arena tour sold out quickly, but there was a huge size difference in where they were. Hopefully she’d reach his level one day. “I do, I do. It’s not a big deal, I didn’t think you were avoiding me or anything.” For a bit she did, but that was wiped away when she’d realized he released the tour dates. It had been months of almost meetings but she had faith in the universe. When it was meant to happen, it would. 

“God no, I was excited to. Did y’want to come sit with us over there?” He motioned to the private area she was allowed into but not been brave enough to venture to quite yet. 

“Sure, that would be nice.” Y/N hadn’t expected to be invited to sit with him personally, let alone feel his hand on her back as he led them through the crowd of people in the room. The star said hellos as he walked through but somehow had mastered the art of saying hi without being caught into a conversation without seeming rude. That was a skill she sure as hell was envious of.

His hand was really fucking warm. She could feel slight calluses on his fingertips, in true musician fashion, but they weren’t as rough as one would originally expect. Her backless dress did her no favors in hiding the warmth and how nice and comforting his touch felt, and she wasn’t sure if she wanted to thank or scowl at her stylist. It wasn’t half as uncomfortable as the dress they’d pulled for the carpet, thankfully this dress was a slinky, emerald green one with room for her legs to actually move. Her updo had been taken down to a mess of curls that nearly reached where his hands were- the power of extensions. As heavy as her head felt, she couldn’t deny that she felt exceptionally beautiful. Thank god the universe had chosen today to meet Harry. 

“Finally!” Sarah sighed. “I’ve been waiting for you two to meet for ages. Come sit.” The woman had always been very sweet, even more sweet with a few drinks in her. Saying her hellos to the familiar people, she felt Harry sit himself next to her in the booth and immediately drinks were brought over. So this is why it was VIP. It was a lemon drop, something Y/N did happen to like. Harry handing her one before taking his own was unexpected but very appreciated, a gentle thank you exchanged as he settled back next to her. 

It was unreal to be here. To be sat at a table of friendly but insanely successful people, feel like part of the ‘in’ crowd, it had completely blindsided her. This was the sort of thing that she’d always thought about when she was in her bed at home as a teenager, hoping one day to rub elbows with the people she once admired so much they had space on her bedroom wall, and here it was. Someone who’s face was on her favorite bedtime tee shirt (Those merch shirts were expensive and she wasn’t about to get rid of it because a member was now in her circle). 

“Y/N, did you know that H added some of your songs to the preshow playlist in his dressing room?” Sarah hummed. 

“You did?” The girl gasped as she looked at him. If she didn’t know better, she could have sworn she saw a bit of a pink glint to his cheeks. Maybe it was the alcohol. 

“He did, and he’s been raving about it to Mitch. Sometimes he’s singing it when we pass, that one song about the… what’s it called? The Raven? Some sort of bird.” 

“I think you’ve had enough to drink.” Mitch had to laugh at her airing a bit of Harry’s business, but she was a chatterbox when she was drunk. 

“That’s so nice!” Y/N said shyly. “You’re on mine too, actually. The dressing room for me and the one the fans listen to, I can hear them sing it from backstage.”

Harry’s leg was pressed into hers so she didn’t have to turn far to look at him, watching him finish his drink as he nodded. “I do, yeah. Told you I liked your music. I meant it.”

“Yeah, if he didn’t he wouldn’t mention it. That’s why when he met that girl earlier he just said it was nice to meet-” Sarah was cut off by her husband asking her if she wanted to see something on his phone, putting Harry out of his misery. 

“M’not an ass.” He groaned. “I just didn’t vibe with the album, y’know? I won’t say things I don’t mean but that doesn’t mean I can’t be polite.”

“Agree, 100%. It’s easy when it’s just a taste thing, but I’ve found it harder with people I’ve seen or heard talk bad about me and it’s confirmed. Dunno how you’re able to do that.” Y/N struggled to not show her nerves or distaste of people sometimes and it was something she was constantly working on. Her best friend often had to tell her to adjust her facial expressions and she’d even gone viral once for a ‘stink face’ she’d made at someone. It was accidental of course, but it’d also caused one of her first big waves of hate. 

“It’s not easy, and anyone who says so is lying.” Harry confirmed. “It’s taken me years. Said something about pussy on tv not realizing the cameras could see, so It’s trial and error.” The joke had the both of them laughing, Y/N not divulging that she indeed already knew that. “I think it’s important to just remember they’re humans and probably just as nervous t’see you. It’s just a short interaction and you can move on quickly. I also think working out, yoga, all of that helps a lot with my inner calm. It isn’t easy, like I said, but you’re also in the beginnings of your career in this sort of light. I’ve got no doubt that you’ll be able to have a good poker face by the end of the year.”

“God, I love that song.” Y/N sighed. “Poker face, loved that one I mean. But thank you. I really do appreciate the advice. I was terrified coming tonight. The award shows are much scarier than your own gigs.” 

“Oh, definitely.” Harry whistled, taking another drink from the tray and handing a fresh one to her. “S’like, you know the people who go to your shows are there for you. It’s like a little family get together, it’s safer. Those people love you enough t’buy a ticket, travel got knows how long, wears a shirt with your face on it. It’s mental to think about but incredible. These things?” He motioned around the room. “All marketing and partying, but more drama. S’crazy how many people have slept with each other in this room.” Harry realized a bit too late that he’d said too much but thankfully Y/N just giggled in agreement. “You seem to take to it quite well though. Not to sound weird but I saw you accept your awards and socialize a bit here, you’ve probably got the whole room fooled.”

That was a relief and a compliment in her opinion. The goal was to make sure no one sensed the weakness. Unfortunately she’d learned early on that these people could sniff it out like a shark in bloodied water. “That’s the goal.” She replied, leaning back into the seat. Her back was killing her from the bloody heels on her feet and how tight her other dress was, so it was a relief to have this reprieve from them sitting here. 

“So tell me about your tour then. What’s going on with that?”

—-----------

Y/N was drunk. Certifiably hammered. She had one too many lemon drops and apparently, so did Harry. Some of the people had vacated the booth and it left them alone as they talked amongst themselves. With the aid of the liquid courage, she wasn’t losing her mind over how close they were. Sure, her heart was still going a million miles a minute, but that was due to his fingers fiddling with the strap of her dress. Harry was, evidently, a touchy drunk. Clingy. He’d even followed her to the bathroom and waited for her outside before they’d returned. 

In all honesty, she was pretty sure she wouldn’t believe all of this in the morning. That Harry had ignored everyone else in favor of talking to her, tucked away in VIP at a round table, his body closer than it needed to be considering the space. They’d talked about a lot of industry things, but more so the fun and personal. She told him about her collection of band tee shirts and admitting to not having listened to all the bands she wore, but he didn’t judge her for it. Said he went through a phase of doing the same while in the band. She told him about her cat, a Siamese named Simon and he’d cooed over photos on her phone about how cute he’d looked with his collar that had a little flower on it. So many topics were covered, so many things discussed in the last two hours that she felt like she was getting a handle on who he was. 

Though this many drinks, it was bleeding into oversharing.

“Your ex was at the awards?” He asked, eyes slightly red but widening as she dropped the tidbit.

“Yep.” The p in the word was exaggerated with a pop of her lips and an eye roll. “Note to you for the future, don’t fuck anyone involved in your production team. Makes for a nasty breakup and a lot of rude ‘inside sources’ with the press.” Her lips flattened. “And he couldn’t even make me finish, so. Fuck him.”

Harry’s eyes widened further before he groaned, his head dropping to the side onto the leather booth seat. “No, not that, Y/N. C’mon.” He seemed a bit distraught. “It’s always those guys that make your life hell, isn’t it? I’m sorry. I did learn that a bit early on.” He seemed to remember it but she didn’t ask. If he didn’t divulge it, she wasn’t going to pry. “You got the shit end of the stick. It’s one of my embarrassments being a male. Y’don’t have to be a rocket scientist to learn how to pleasure a woman.”

“You’d think.” She scoffed. “Swear, men in LA don’t know how to use any of their appendages. Used like a human fleshlight so I stopped hooking up with people. It got discouraging after the fifth time I left. Not a single one know where the clit is.” It was an unfortunate truth. Maybe she was looking in the wrong places or had a string of bad luck, but she’d been voluntarily celibate because of it. “Doubt you know what m’talking about, Mr Watermelon Sugar.”

Y/N realized her internal thought had become an external one when he broke out into his own giggles, her face heating. She’d definitely not meant for that to be said out loud, but thankfully he didn’t seem offended. It was the truth anyways, any man who loved pleasuring a woman so much that he wrote a whole song about it had to know what he was doing.

As his giggles came down, he replied. “Well, I’d like t’think I do. I…” He swallowed. “Know we just met, but overshare?” Scooting closer, he watched her nod. “I think I get off more on getting other people off, if that makes sense. Like, making someone feel good. I dunno if it’s some sort of ego thing, but I enjoy it a lot. Being the cause of pleasure. Think it probably ties in to a bit of a praise kink I’ve got, but it’s the truth.” 

Y/N had never thought she’d get into this sort of conversation with the man, let alone in a dark corner at the BRITs afterparty, but she wasn’t about to complain. “So it’s true then?” She rose an eyebrow. “You really love eating pussy?” Drunk Y/N had officially taken over. A bit of a drunk, horny Y/N she’d been trying to repress. In the morning she would be mortified that she asked that, but right now she was genuinely curious. 

“I do.” He smirked. “I dunno there’s just something about it. Being the one to make someone gasp. When it feels so good they try and push and pull you at the same time. Love the taste, love t’hear the noises. Maybe it’s a little arrogant of me but your name sounds better when it’s said with pleasure, don’t you think?” 

Y/N should have known better than to ask. Harry was a very attractive, alluring man, he was close to her and smelled so fucking good and god damn it, she was already horny. Her cunt throbbed and she knew she was going to have a wet patch in her thong when she left, but she was a glutton for punishment. “I do. I like giving for the same reason.” She admitted. “I’ve always had a lack of gag reflex so, it’s made it easier for me than other people probably have it.”

Harry’s interest seemed to be stroked, fingers brushing over her bare neck as she spoke. It was hard to concentrate here, with him so close. But Y/N always did like to be a bit of a tease, brushing the tip of her foot over the back of his leg. Maybe they were playing a dangerous game talking about this, but no one else was around. She didn’t fall back when his head dipped slightly, getting closer than necessary. “Look at us then. What a pair.” 

“I know. You’re just bold enough to write a whole song about it.” Her finger poked him playfully in the chest. 

“M’not apologetic about it. A woman’s pleasure is important and often overlooked. Makes me sad that no one’s made you feel good in that long. I hope you’re taking care of yourself at the very least.” Oh, she was. And she would be when she got back to her hotel tonight. Thank god for the suction vibrators. 

“I do, but it’s not the same as having someone else do it for you.” Her drunk self told her it as a good idea to pout, trying not to breath too hard as his fingers caressed the nape of her neck. “Sometimes I just miss the touch of another human, you know? Even innocent touches but, there’s nothing like being fucked so hard you feel it the next day. Feels like it’s impossible to find it anymore.” 

“It’s not.” He replied. Eyes were staring into her own. “You’re fucking stunning. Especially tonight, you could pull anyone in the room.” Gaze dipped down to her cleavage, not hiding that he was looking. Heat that had been bubbling in her stomach spread through the rest of her body, his touch igniting a bit of a spark. 

“Anyone?” Her head tilted to the side. The tension had been growing a bit with the two of them but now it was thick in the air. There was no denying that there was an attraction between them but it was palpable now. “So if I wanted to, I could pull you?” Y/N had no idea if he was even available for anything right now. It wasn't’ a smart idea considering how closely they worked near each other, but right now all she could think about was the fact that she had full confidence that Harry could give her the feelings that she wanted- the fuck she needed. 

“Absolutely. M’hanging on by a thread here.” His voice deepened, face far closer to hers than should be appropriate for two people who just met. “I’ve been trying to be a gentleman all night. M’a bit of a slut sometimes but hookups aren’t usually my thing. Was trying to figure out a way to ask you out but, I’ve been a little nervous.” Fingers curled around the back of her neck as their noses brushed. ‘But fuck it, right?” Warm breaths puffed against each others, leaving the ball in Y/N’s court. 

“Fuck it.” 

Harry took that and ran. Lips pressed against hers as he cradled her neck, angling her how he wanted while he slowly kissed her. It was shockingly intimate despite the setting, smooth, soft lips sucking lightly against hers. There was no sign of stopping as her mouth opened for him, letting their tongue brush and the heat rise between them. His body angled slightly to cover hers from view, he let out a low groan in his throat as her hand raised to his hair. It was soft and a bit long for him as of late, but it felt good between her fingers. His other hand held the side of her face, so gentle but solid that she knew she’d give into any of his demands. 

The party raged on behind them but they got lost in the kisses, one turning to three, turning to ten and they hardly came up for air. There was no doubt her makeup was going to be fucked up, that her lipstick was done for, but there was no better way to ruin it. “Y’taste so sweet.” Harry’s words were whispered against her swelling lips. “And you smell so good. Been driving me a bit crazy. Wanted to meet you for ages cause I knew we’d get on… but didn’t think we’d get on this well.” He chuckled into the kiss, squeezing the back of her neck and making her melt slightly into him. “Hoped for it, though.” 

“You did?” Her own voice was breathless as she tried to catch up to his kisses.. It was hard not to get butterflies when he hummed in agreement. Harry had been excited to meet her. “Had a little crush, did you?” The statement was fully meant to be a tease, but he agreed. 

“Suppose I did.”

[spideysbruh]

your song

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y/n thank you London!!! 'twas a good show innit?? 😁😁💕💕💕🫶🫶

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ynxflo girl stop. (I love you im sorry)

ynscurtains well she's def timmys girlfriend !!!

tchalamet 'twas the best concert I've ever been to, luv!

y/n you so get me, luv

tchalamet absolutely beautiful gorgeous amazing spectacular best girl ever

y/n liked

lifetimeyn timmy is always so down bad 😭

tchalamet just posted a story!

caption- mi estrella

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y/n home 💕

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tchalamet i love seeing you on stage more than anything else

y/n I miss you.

rocketyn can't wait for your show next week🙏🏼🙏🏼

loveyn grammy nominations tmrw 😳😳😳

y/n just posted a story!

caption- he surprised meeeee 🥺😭😭💕💕💕🫶🫶🫶

y/n just posted a story!

caption- IM GRAMMY NOMINATED?!?!?? I can't stop crying

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y/n forever and ever grateful for everything. these nominations mean so much to me. I never thought in a million years I would be graced with a nomination, let alone three! so incredibly happy. i cannot stop crying, thank you thank you thank you.

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tchalamet I'm so proud of you. your reaction was the greatest thing ever.

liked by y/n

oliviarodrigo YOU DESERVE ITTT 💕💕

y/n YOU DO TOO LIV I LOVE YOU FOREVERRR

rachelzegler AHHHH I LOVE YOU MY BEST FRIEND IS SO TALENTED

liked by y/n

florencepugh CONGRATULATIONS MY PRETTYYY

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liked by y/n, florencepugh and 3,727,788 others

tchalamet this beautiful girl is nominated for three grammys!!! proud is an understatement. I have seen her stay up late, wake up early and not even sleep to finish a song, video or her album, the most dedicated artist I know. I am so lucky to see your process from beginning to end. the most deserving person there is.

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y/n my muse

timmysgf girl I guess...

karmayn HE'S NOT GOING TO DATE YOU

honeymoonyn crying. i need a bf

y/n just posted a story!

caption- it's moments like these with my favorite people during a time like this that make me so incredibly appreciative 💕

tchalamet just posted a story!

caption- she serenaded me today😍😍

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y/n did a cover of one of my favorite songs of all time. 'your song' by the one and only Sir Elton John cover is now available to view on youtube!

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lovelyyn THE WAY SHE STARTS SINGING AND SHES LOOKONG RIGHT AT TIMMY OMFGGG

laurieslaurence ik they didn't rly show him, but you KNOW timmy was sitting in that room too with the amount of times she looked in that corner LMAOO

kingsyn my fave cover

horroryn you gotta sing this song when you're truly in love. that's why this one sounds so beautiful 😭😭💕

tchalamet so lucky I got to see this in person

eltonjohn wow!

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y/n just posted a story!

caption- the sweetest eyes I've ever seen.

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tchalamet grammys with my one and only.

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[stevesjockstrap]

Part 2/2 🖤 part one or Read on ao3 • rated E — all the smut in this one (full tags on ao3)

tattoo artist Eddie, swimmer Steve Harrington, oblivious Eddie, pierced Eddie, appearance by Steve’s jockstrap 🫠 dom!Eddie, brat Steve ofc

@steddieonmywaywardson @steddiesummerexchange

Thanks again to @fuctacles and @lawrencebshoggoth 😘

Walking into the bar a few days later to see Steve in a tight crop top and very short jean shorts with the Calvin Klein band of his underwear showing a few inches above them had Eddie almost dropping to his knees.

He hadn’t been that excited about the 80’s theme night at their regular dive bar but now being faced with the happy trail and bare arms of his … what would he even call their relationship? They weren’t exactly friends. He was a little more than a client, honestly, but Eddie was hoping for much more than that. He just didn’t think it was going to happen. Gorgeous athletic assuredly straight guys like Steve Harrington do not end up with fuck ups like Eddie Munson. He knew what he looked like, the long hair and piercings and almost all of his body covered in weird tattoos. Cute frat boy types didn’t go for the likes of him.

“Eddie!”

He spun around to see Chrissy in a bright neon pink leotard with a headband. His own leather jacket and Judas Priest T-shirt seemed lame now, looking around at everyone who had gone above and beyond for the theme.

“Hey Chrissy. Love the outfit. Are you leading us in Jazzercise tonight?”

She laughed hard and genuine, throwing her head back and making her high pony tail swing around.

Steve came up next to them with an easy grin. “Hey Ed! How are you?”

“Hi Steve. Pretty good, pretty good. You guys really went all out, huh?”

Steve huffed a small laugh and shrugged, completely nonplussed that he was the hottest person in the place. Maybe the state. What Eddie would give-

“Can I buy you a drink?” Someone came up beside them, looking Chrissy up and down.

“Sure!” The guy in a cowboy hat and jeans (maybe had forgotten which theme night he was attending, or maybe he thought it was the 1880s, who knew) offered her his elbow and lead them to the bar. Steve threw a thumbs up at her when she turned to look back at him and Eddie wanted to run away immediately.

Thankfully he was saved by the Corroded Coffin boys showing up, but then Eddie had to awkwardly introduce them officially after they ragged on him for their enthusiastic session.

But Steve was amazing, unquestioningly shaking their hands and engaging in the typical polite small talk. The boys complimented his outfit without making it feel weird, and Steve excitedly pointed out Drew’s Metallica shirt and started an in-depth conversation about the album (making Eddie silently swoon beside him).

Chrissy rejoined them after cutting her suitor loose, and they all found themselves hanging at a corner of the bar, shooting the shit with the bartender and judging everyone else’s attire and the music.

As more and more alcohol was consumed, Eddie was quickly losing his mind. Steve was so comfortable in himself, talking with anyone who approached the bar or started talking with them. It shouldn’t have been that attractive, but Eddie who had grown up with all the same people surrounding him now, he found it hard to make friends. Chrissy and Argyle had found their way into his life by accident, but their extroverted selves had just adopted the sad boys in the tattoo shop and frequently drug them out of their comfort zones.

Eddie almost swallowed his tongue when a tall good looking man approached Steve and asked him to dance, waiting to see the hate crime in action that he was expecting. Waiting for the other shoe to drop, something to finally burst the Steve Harrington shaped bubble forming in his heart.

Instead, Steve gave him a demure smile and went with him, actually taking his hand and allowing the man to escort him to the dance floor where they quickly got into the groove and Eddie was dumbfounded.

He blinked at Chrissy and she sent him a look, but he was too drunk to decipher it. He couldn’t figure out why this was somehow worse than when he’d assumed Steve was straight and unattainable. Now that there may be a possibility — he shook his head at himself, quickly draining his cup and waving off the questions from the boys as he threw cash onto the table and stood. He had to go home before he embarrassed himself. Or made a fool of himself in front of Steve.

Gareth sent him a small sad smile and patted his shoulder as he went past.

The next few days went by quickly, Eddie trying to settle the slight nausea whenever he thought of how he’d acted with Steve at his tattoo appointment (and the consult meeting beforehand), forcing himself to be even more professional at his appointments now to try to overcompensate.

“Are you into Steve?”

Eddie scoffed and watched as the cue ball went wide, missing its target completely. “What the fuck, Chrissy?”

She smirked at him from the other side of the table, quickly pocketing two of her striped balls.

“Well?” She asked again. Chrissy had drug him back to the bar, apparently to interrogate him.

“Is this just a dirty trick to win at pool? Or a real question?” Eddie peered at her while she scoped out the table.

“A question can be more than one thing,” Chrissy said with a wide grin. “People, too.”

Eddie frowned, game now forgotten. “What does that mean?”

Chrissy shrugged and took a drink from her beer. Eddie took a few steps closer to her. “Is Steve asking about me?”

She had let it slip earlier that she’d gotten together with him and Eddie tried not to let it bother him. They’d only exchanged a few messages since he had been in his tattoo chair. Eddie had tried to keep it cool, letting Steve know scars were finicky and not to worry about any areas that healed strangely. He’d be able to touch them up. Eddie had winced to himself at the double entendre and then the conversation hadn’t really progressed like before.

Chrissy shrugged again and Eddie wanted to shake her.

“Chris, you’re killing me.” He gulped down his own beer and sighed. “Look. I tried to be so professional with Steve. If I made him uncomfortable I can apologize or whatever. But yeah, he’s fucking gorgeous and sweet and funny and completely out of my league. You probably know all of this, and you’re fucking with me. To win a dumb game of pool. But, for your own sick twisted amusement, yes. I know I have zero chance, but I know I’ve never been that hard while tattooing someone. Does that answer all the things of your question?”

She just nodded, but had a small sly grin on her face.

Eddie lost three games of pool before he called it a night. Then went home and scrolled through his messages with Steve to torture himself.

“Are you inviting your boy to the party?”

Eddie actually looked behind him to see who Gareth was talking to, and not seeing anyone in the vicinity, he frowned. “Huh?”

“The big end of summer thing at Argyle’s? Are you going to invite Steve?”

Eddie dropped his phone, and Gareth snickered at him. “He’s not- Wha- Do- uh.” He looked around the packed shop, lowering his voice. “Should I?”

Gareth rolled his eyes. “How long are you going to keep circling each other? You obviously both like each other, he gets along well with all of us somehow, you act like a lovestruck teenager when he’s around. What’s stopping you?”

Eddie thunked his head on the table and Gareth chuckled at his dramatics.

He’d always kept a decent eye on his schedule and appointments, Argyle complimenting him because trying to figure out the other guy’s schedules and trying to work with their convoluted systems was more than he could take some days.

It wasn’t until he walked into his office and found Steve there instead of the promised Mike Hawk that he second guessed giving him access to his calendar.

“Oh. Um. Hi, Steve. Why are you- I mean, its good to see you, but well, uh…”

Eddie trailed off, awkwardly standing in his own doorway.

“It may have been Chrissy’s idea,” Steve supplied. “And Argyle… could put someone in your calendar. I couldn’t get a hold of you, and I didn’t really want to bother you by just showing up and taking away from your work, I just, I dunno.” He was so genuine and seemed shy now somehow, even more endearing to Eddie.

“Uh, sure. That doesn’t seem stalkery at all,” Eddie huffed.

“Think of it more as, I dunno, just a surprise appointment instead of being tricked by all of your friends.” Steve grabbed the back of his neck, smirking.

“Oh? Is that what we are? Friends?”

That didn’t seem to deter Steve at all, in fact his smile widened and maybe blushing.

“I was hoping, to be that, or…” Steve stood, and Eddie realized he was wearing the black sweatpants he had sent him home in. “Since I sort of have an appointment, could you look at this tattoo for me? The last guy, he did his best, but you know, tattoos over scars can be finicky, I hear.”

Eddie laughed, his heart unclenching. “Yeah, you know not all tattoo artists are as professional as me.”

Steve walked closer to him, reaching behind him to pull his door shut. Eddie swallowed.

Wiggling out of the sweatpants and turning, Eddie let out a gasp. Steve stood before him in a jockstrap, tattoo still healing but areas on and around his scars lighter and fuzzier. However, his brain mostly clued into the fact that Steve’s entire ass was bare to him, and all of his long legs.

“Uhh huh, well it does seem like your scars haven’t taken the ink as well. C-can, um, can you stay here for a minute? Just give me one minute?”

Steve turned again, giving him a small nod and stepping back into his (Eddie’s) sweats.

In the middle of the tattoo shop, Eddie stopped and looked around. Only about half of the guys were in today. Weekdays they didn’t all need to be here. Argyle smirked at him from the front desk. Eddie glared and approached him quickly.

“What is this all about? You putting fake names in my schedule for people to ambush me now?”

“Hey, you’re welcome, brochacho. Go back there and get your shit together.”

Eddie laughed, all his annoyance gone instantly. He met Argyle’s outstretched fist with his own, shaking his head. “Thanks, man.”

Realizing he had actually left a hot half naked guy alone in his office, he quickly grabbed stuff from his work station and hustled back, locking the door behind him.

Steve was lounging on his couch with his arms crossed, making his arms and shoulders look ridiculous.

“So, um, this last dude who tattooed you, was he- you know, did you like him?” Eddie grinned, tucking his tongue behind his teeth.

“Ah, he was alright. I think I’m going to like you a lot better though.”

Eddie chuckled, shaking his head as he dumped his stuff on his desk.

“I think we’re going to set up shop back here, if that’s cool with you. I kind of got drug over the coals for, uh, an interesting session a few weeks ago. The boys won’t let me live down another performance like that. And since we’re just doing a touch up…”

Steve reached behind his head to grab the collar of his shirt and pulled it off with a flourish. “Fine by me. Although, between us, that guy probably enjoyed the attention.”

Eddie stopped to groan, rubbing over his face. “Fuck. Well, maybe next time then, Stevie.”

His gaze slid from his cocky grin down his hairy chest, down to his tantalizing happy trail that was still burned in his memory from the bar that night.

“God, you’re pretty,” he breathed, unaware he had said it out loud until the belly he was eyeing shuddered with a laugh.

“Where do you want me, Eds?”

“Uhh, there’s an old bench shoved here somewhere. Gotta be more comfortable than on my desk.” As he said it, he winced but he watched as Steve’s eyes darkened.

“Yeah, you can bend me over your desk another time.”

“Jesus Christ,” Eddie chuckled.

Eddie popped up the dusty table, quickly but efficiently wiping it down with disinfectant before beckoning him over. Steve stood again, sliding the sweats from his legs as Eddie watched, enraptured. He didn’t take his eyes off of him as he laid down, arching his back as he positioned himself and had to hang his arms off the sides to fit.

Other tattoos he hadn’t gotten to see before drew his attention away from the magnificent ass, some script across his ribs and a baseball bat with nails through it on his bicep.

The one he’d done on his thigh was the biggest, and was the most detailed. If he’d known (or had thought to ask any questions) he would’ve prepared Steve better for the pain he’d had to endure. Hindsight being what it was, he just shrugged at himself and carried on. Nothing to do for it now. Steve had come back, after all.

Sucking in a deep breath, Eddie traced a finger down his spine and over the leg strap that crossed over the tattoo. “Gunna slide this up a little, baby.”

The word felt like too much, hanging between them, but Steve made a little affirmative noise in his throat and arched into the touch.

Eddie put his gloves on, got his tray set up and let himself believe this was actually happening.

“You gunna sit so good for me again, sweetheart?”

Steve whined and nodded, Eddie watched his fingers flex into fists.

“Your pretty little mermaid for everyone to see, been showing it off to everyone?”

“No, haven’t, not really. Did everything you said. Even kept it out of the sun.”

Eddie coughed to cover the little whimper that came out of him, when he realized there were no tan lines to be found on all of the skin under his hands. Steve must sunbathe in the nude, but hadn’t been with his new tattoo.

“You like following my directions, Stevie?” He smirked even though he knew Steve couldn’t see.

“Yes sir.”

Eddie almost dropped the tattoo gun. “Fuck, sweetheart. Just relax. Just be a good boy for now, okay? I’ll take care of you.”

“Mhm,” Steve whined as Eddie continued. Thankfully his previous self had plotted the scars mostly in the mermaids dark hair or background, easily able to blend into shadows and such so he didn’t need to redo stencils or think very much, since most of his focus was again on the little noises Steve was making and his ass under his hands.

Steve had definitely been holding back the first time, because now the noises were even more constant and pornographic. Eddie knew he was dripping in his boxers, trying his best to quickly deposit the ink in Steve’s perfect skin.

“Doing so well, pretty boy.”

“Feels good, Eds. Could sit here forever,” Steve whimpered.

“Mhm,” Eddie hummed, not acknowledging the lie as he watched Steve’s jaw flex and the muscles bunch under his hands. “Relax, Steve. Or I’ll stop.”

Cooing at his devastated noise, Eddie wiped ink from his body again and pressed a kiss to his side, making Steve cry out and his hips jolt.

“Oh fuck, you’re going to be the death of me. How can you be this hot?”

Eddie stopped. “Huh? Me?”

“Of course, Eds. You think all of this was for show? I just get naked in front of people I don’t think are hot?”

That stumped him. “I mean- uh, but-“

“I thought I was pretty blatant the first time, but Chrissy-“

“Chrissy,” Eddie groaned. Of course she was in on this. This stunt had her name written all over it. “Holy shit.”

Steve rolled over on his other hip to look up at him. “Eds, it was her idea but only because I had been whining to her about not knowing how to get your attention. She said you were not going to catch any subtle teasing or jealousy tactics, that I’d have to go big and obvious. This was as, uh, big and obvious as we could agree upon.”

Eddie frowned. “Agree upon?”

“Chrissy had much more elaborate plans, but I didn’t want to like publicly embarrass either of us. I just wanted it to be us, and you know, maybe the shop guys, that was really hot last time. But-“

Eddie stopped him with a kiss, Steve grinning into it and finally wrapping his arms around him. He ripped the black rubber gloves from his hands and someone pushed the tray of supplies out of the way, then suddenly he had a lapful of mostly naked Steve.

When they finally broke apart gasping, he traced Steve’s wet bottom lip with his thumb and Steve pulled it into his mouth. “Goddamn you’re amazing. So fucking gorgeous. Could look at you forever.”

Steve gave him a blinding smile from around his thumb, licking across the pad before letting it go. “Promise?”

“Yes, baby.”

Their lips crashed together again and Eddie’s hands went to his hair to hold him where he wanted him and around his waist to pull him closer, their hard lengths meeting between their layers. Eddie knew this was not good for his brand new tattoo but he couldn’t break their desperate kiss.

Steve kissed down his jaw to his neck, nosing his hair out of his way.

“Stevie baby, gotta-“

He laughed at the petulant whine he received. “Settle down, just don't want to fuck up all the work I did, even though I know redoing it again would be enjoyable for both of us. Turn over for me and I’ll take care of you.”

Working together, they arranged Steve to stand bending over the table and Eddie slid close behind him, licking across his hole and sliding a hand into the front of his jock.

“Please, please Eds- oh my god,” Steve wailed as he fucked himself back and forth, not sure if he wanted to rut himself into his mouth or his hand.

“I got you, sweetheart. Come for me and I’ll clean you all up and take you home.”

Steve arched back into him again. “That’s the hottest thing anyone’s ever said. Ever.”

Eddie swiped his tongue over his spasming hole again, making him shudder. “I think you’re a bit biased right now, but I’ll remember that.”

Ignoring his own throbbing cock, he slurped and stroked until Steve made the hottest noise he’d ever heard (he was definitely biased), coming hard into his sexy little jockstrap.

“That’s my good boy,” Eddie growled, nosing between his legs against his clothed spent balls and making Steve whimper.

“Stay still and let me wrap your fucking tattoo and then I’m dragging you home.”

“Y’ssir,” Steve slurred, slumping down onto his hands on the table, poking his ass up further into the air.

“Can’t believe you rode your motorcycle to get a tattoo on your ass, you absolute menace,” Eddie huffed.

“I was hopeful I would be getting a ride after.”

Eddie cackled along with Steve as they took the short drive to his place.

“As if there would be any other possible outcome with you throwing your gorgeous self at me.”

Steve shrugged, undoing his seatbelt. “Could’ve been. I’m not everyone’s cup of tea.”

Eddie looked at him like he was insane. “You mean, like, blind people? Lesbians?”

Giggling, Steve stuck his tongue out playfully. Eddie pretended to reach for it. “I’m a hit with lesbians, for the record.”

“Of course you are, handsome. Now get inside before I embarrass both of us in this parking lot.”

Wanting to get out of the shop quickly and without many eyes on them, Eddie had persuaded Steve just to put the sweatpants back on and snuck out the back staff door. Steve had confirmed that the rest of his appointments for the evening had also been fake (Benedict Phalange and Jack M. Ihoff, he needed to get more creative friends honestly) so they could run off without guilt.

Eddie left Steve waiting impatiently on his doorstep as he rushed around his apartment throwing dirty clothes into his closet, gathered all the trash from his coffee table and as a last resort sprayed air freshener everywhere.

Pulling the door back open with a flourish, he ducked his head down and bowed, putting on a voice. “My liege, welcome to my very humble abode. Me casa es the landlords casa, unfortunately. But it’s supposedly earthquake proof.”

Steve snickered at him, pulling him from his low bow and pushing him against the door. “Well let’s test that out, shall we?”

“Fuck, I’m keeping you,” Eddie groaned before meeting his hungry kiss. “Let’s go test out the shower first.”

After pushing and pulling each other to the bathroom and losing clothes along the way, after they’d wriggled Eddie’s pants off, Steve looked him over with wide eyes.

Eddie felt unnerved for a long moment before Steve made a low appreciative noise and ran a finger from the ink on his throat to the metal through his nipple and gasped as his eyes trailed lower.

“It’s yours?”

Eddie frowned, almost gasping himself as Steve dropped to his knees in front of him, then realized what had grabbed Steve’s attention. “Oh. You didn’t know?”

Steve traced along the harpy tattoo above his knee. “I didn’t know it was on you, Mr. Humble. Letting me rave over it and you didn’t feel the need to tell me you tattooed it onto yourself? That’s beyond badass, Eds.”

Maybe finally cluing into the fact that he was kneeling in front of him, Steve looked up from under his lashes at him, pressing a quick wet kiss to the tattoo before hooking his fingers in the elastic of Eddie’s boxer briefs to pull them down.

“Is- are- oh my god.”

“Not sure I can answer that one, honey,” Eddie laughed.

Steve continued staring until he finally thumbed at the metal through the head of his cock. “How do you keep getting hotter?” He pulled back, shedding his (Eddie’s) sweatpants and jockstrap in one motion. “C’mon, I need that in my mouth right the fuck now.”

Eddie would be embarrassed for the noise that came out of him as Steve sunk to his knees the moment they stepped in the shower, but then his brain was being sucked out of his dick. He threw one hand out to hold himself up and slid the other into Steve’s thick hair as his hot mouth slid down his length.

He realized his eyes had slid closed and forced them back open to see the gorgeous man below him. “Fuck, baby. Look so good like this,” he gasped.

Steve pushed himself up another inch with a high whine before pulling off. “Can’t take your huge cock.”

Eddie thought his legs were going to drop out from under him as Steve dived back down to swallow around the head of his dick. “Jesus Christ, where did you come from?”

All he could do was try to stay standing, almost sure his brain was going down the shower drain watching Steve as he lapped against the piercing or his cute little furrowed brow as he tried his best to take him down to the hilt.

“Don’t hurt yourself, sweetheart. Doing so good.”

He huffed, sending air across the head of his cock and he jolted a bit, making his piercing slide across Steve’s lips. “Just want all of it,” he pouted.

Unable to help himself, he grabbed a better handful of the hair on the back of Steve’s head and pulled his mouth back onto him. “Tap me if you need to,” he rasped.

Steve made a pretty keening noise and blinked up at him.

Pushing forward only a little further than Steve had been able to take before, he waited for Steve to take a long breath before fucking into his mouth.

“Such a good boy,” he couldn’t help but groan as his throat opened up for him. Carefully inching forward again, he rocked back and forth, leaving only a couple inches untouched.

Steve pushed against his thigh and he quickly backed off, but Steve gasped out, “So fucking hot, Eds. Do it harder. And I want all of it. Make me take it.”

Eddie’s knees almost gave out. “The fucking mouth on you, pretty boy.”

The only response he received was a low hum around the head of his cock before Steve pushed himself down onto this length and looked up expectantly at him.

He watched his face intently as he used the grip on his wet hair to pull him steadily forward. Sliding past his perfect lips, he moaned as they met the curly hair at the base and Steve swallowed around him.

“That’s it baby,” he huffed, yanking him off and letting him suck in a shallow breath before rocking all the way back in. Tears joined the water dripping down his cheeks but he wouldn’t let Eddie stop, whining and shoving himself back down even as his gag reflex fought him. “God, I lo-“ he shook his head. It was too soon. “Gunna come, Stevie.”

Steve bobbed his head and kept humming and swallowing around him until Eddie saw stars and reached above him for the shower rod to hang on to as he came down his throat.

“Oh fuck,” he hissed as the soft tongue cleaned him up. Then he almost hit the floor again when Steve looked up at him with his big round eyes, wrapping both hands around his own hard dick, getting himself off while looking him up and down. “Come for me, beautiful. Then I’m chaining you to my bed. Never letting you go.”

“Ah! Eds!” Steve made eye contact with him as he shuddered through his release, finally leaning his forehead against Eddie’s hip to catch his breath.

Once they were cleaned up and dry, cuddled up in bed, Steve looked around searchingly and Eddie raised an eyebrow at him. “Where’re your chains?”

Days later after not getting to see each other due to their schedules and Eddie trying not to come on too strongly (honestly he’d ask Steve to move in with him if he didn’t think he would run away screaming), Steve picked him up for Argyle’s party.

“I don’t know that I consented to a motorcycle ride,” Eddie smirked. God, don’t get hard. Don’t get hard.

“Parking over there is atrocious, this way we won’t have to walk a mile.”

Eddie kissed his cheek as he took the helmet held out for him. “Good thinking, sweetheart.”

He tried not to get too excited. But the vibration of the bike under him and holding on to Steve as he zipped through the city was exhilarating. Steve wiggled his hips back into him teasingly. He growled into his ear, “Be good.”

Steve shook his head and wiggled again. Eddie grabbed his hips and rutted his hard cock against his back. When that only made the wiggling continue, he looked around quickly before sliding his hand down between Steve’s legs.

Chuckling darkly against his shoulder as he gasped and revved the engine. “Don’t kill us, pretty, haven’t gotten to do everything I want to you yet.”

The hardness in his hand twitched and Steve slowed down the bike, turning a corner and taking them down a more deserted street.

“And don’t come,” he hissed as he squeezed a bit tighter.

They made it to Argyle’s in one piece miraculously, Steve whining at him as he hopped off the bike and pulled both of their helmets off to meet his lips.

“C’mon Stevie, before we get arrested in his front yard for indecent exposure.”

No one was surprised to see them walk in together, Eddie had been unable to stop talking about their developing relationship to anyone and everyone who would listen. Drew would jokingly make gagging noises at him and Gareth would loudly fake moan from next to him in the studio or bar.

“Ah our favorite pet project has arrived!” Argyle called out when he saw them, nudging Chrissy who was draped over his shoulder, apparently this meddling had brought them back together.

“Hey guys,” Chrissy beamed at them.

It was unbearably hot, but under the umbrellas and awning in the back of the house it was a bit more tolerable, and people were jumping in and out of the pool.

Eddie almost swallowed his tongue when Steve came out of the bathroom wearing a tiny sporty looking speedo and nothing else. He grabbed his elbow and pulled him back into the bathroom. “Are you trying to kill me? What is that?”

Steve just grinned. “It’s a pool party, babe. This is a bathing suit,” speaking slowly and deliberately like he was explaining something very complicated. “You wear it in the pool.”

“Uh huh, smart ass. What about keeping your new tattoo out of the sun? You’re pushing it, you’re already lucky I’m letting you swim at all.”

“Mmm, let me, Eds? What else do I have your permission to do?” Steve pulled him close by the waistband of his own plain black trunks.

“Fuck, you are trying to kill me,” he breathed, closing the distance between their lips. But after a quick kiss he pulled back. Looking into his eyes, he promised lowly, “Keep being a brat and you’ll end up bent over Argyle’s weird furniture. You have one free cheek.”

Someone knocked hard on the door and they jumped apart. One of Argyle’s friends snickered at them as they hurried out past him.

Steve continued teasing him incessantly throughout the party, dragging him into the pool and wrapping his arms and legs around him so Eddie could carry him around, after they’d gotten out and dried off he got back in then plopped his cold wet self right onto Eddie’s lap and got comfortable. Taking any opportunity to touch him, pulling him in for kisses mid-sentence with their friends if he felt like it, licking invisible crumbs from his fingers as he ate.

“This must be the famous Eddie, then,” a voice came from above them and Steve squawked as he jumped up to throw his arms around the person.

Eddie recognized her immediately from Steve’s instagram.

“Robin! I thought you couldn’t make it!” He was almost jumping up and down, Eddie found himself grinning just from how excited he was.

“Well I texted you a bunch, but it seems like you don’t have your phone.” She looked pointedly down to his tiny bathing suit.

Steve smirked at her and they shared a long look, seeming to have a conversation without talking.

“So Eddie, what are your intentions with my platonic soulmate?” Robin asked seriously as she dropped into the chair next to him. “How do you feel about him wanting six kids?”

Eddie looked quickly between them, throat going dry suddenly, “Uhhh, I mean, um-“

“Aww leave him alone, Bob. I’ve already been messing with him all day,” Steve laughed, plopping himself back into Eddie’s lap.

As the day went on, drinks were consumed and games played, Steve still finding any excuse to use Eddie as a chair and pressing his lips anywhere he could reach.

The final straw was when Steve plucked an ice cube from Eddie’s drink and as he watched, licked some of the dripping drink from it but instead of popping the entire thing in his mouth (which would’ve been hot enough on its own), he tucked it down the front of Eddie’s swim trunks.

Robin laughed at them as Eddie squeaked before grabbing Steve’s hand and pulling him into the house.

Steve’s wide grin told him everything he needed to know.

“Thought you liked being my good boy, why are you acting up?” He crowded close to him, cupping his face and making him meet his eyes.

“Want you, Eds, please,” Steve pouted and gave him big puppy dog eyes.

“You’ve been sitting on my dick all day, honey. What else do you need? Huh?”

Steve pulled away and Eddie almost pouted himself, but then he just looked around before asking, “Are there bedrooms here?”

Barking a quick relieved laugh, he took his hand again and they ran up the stairs. Locking the door and pushing Steve against it, he met his desperate kiss and lined up their hips with a groan.

“Take this tiny thing off, babe.” He pulled at the hip of his speedo and Steve giggled.

Together they got their suits off and Eddie shoved him until he landed on the bed. He pulled open the nightstand and his eyebrows shot up. “Good for you, Argyle.”

He threw a condom and a small bottle of lube onto the bed and left the rest alone.

“Yessss, want your huge cock in me,” Steve hissed as he squirmed around on the bed.

“Settle down, Stevie, I think I promised you something else if you were going to keep being a brat,” he taunted.

“Want that, too.” He maneuvered himself onto his knees with his back to Eddie.

Momentarily distracted by his own art on the expanse of skin before him, his eyes then traveled up and he let out a deep groan. “Holy fuck, Stevie. How haven’t I seen this one?”

Eddie traced over the delicate lettering right under his perfect dimples in the small of his back, his jaw actually dropping. “You are just a pretty little babygirl, aren’t you?”

Steve arched his back with a high whine as he dragged his finger down between his cheeks. Without warning he slapped across his bare cheek and chuckled at his little squeak.

“More, c’mon,” he taunted, rising up on his hands on the bed.

Eddie hummed thoughtfully and swatted harder against him a handful of times in quick succession before grabbing a handful of cheek in a harsh grip, enjoying the rough inhale of breath and little whimper he received.

He continued spanking down his thigh and swatting over his perfect tramp stamp until everything was a warm pink and Steve was writhing and widening his legs so he’d get a peak of his pretty hole.

“Please,” Steve whined prettily. “Need your cock, please. Oh fuck!” Eddie smacked once more hard across his ass.

Quickly grabbing the lube, he chuckled as Steve flopped down onto his face on the bed, arching his back and immediately showing off his ass. Eddie swiped his wet fingers across it, trying to prepare him quickly as his own dick screamed at him to just shove inside.

Finally after Steve was a quivering whimpering mess on the bed, he removed his fingers and rolled the condom on.

“Oh, c-could, um,” Steve stammered.

“Why’re you gettin’ shy on me now, pretty? What do you want?”

He huffed, half hiding his face into the sheet under him, and Eddie tried as best he could to patiently wait for him to say something.

“Can, you know, can we do it the other way? Wanna see you. Hold onto you.” Steve couldn’t look at him while he said it, and Eddie wanted to go throttle whoever had told this gorgeous man that he didn’t deserve to be taken care of.

“C’mere, Stevie,” he cooed, and his eyes shot to his, widening when he realized Eddie was serious. He turned over, sitting up on the edge of the bed and Eddie knelt in front of him, pulling him in close. “Gunna treat you so well, babygirl. You already have me wrapped right around your little finger. Of course we can do romantic and soft,” he laughed.

Steve’s eyebrows turned down and he gave him a little pout. “Didn’t say anything about soft,” he grumbled.

They laughed together, and Eddie pressed a kiss to the side of his mouth, then his forehead. “Gunna have me eating out of your hand, aren’t you babygirl? Gunna have me completely whipped. I can already tell.”

Steve simply shrugged and pulled him in for a deeper kiss, wrapping his arms and legs around him. Finally he pulled away, gasping, “Please fuck me already. I can’t wait anymore. And Robin is very needy, she’ll come look for us soon.”

Eddie snorted. “Oh, she’s needy, huh? Must’ve learned that from you.”

He watched as he got his gorgeous self spread out across the bed, fluffing pillows behind his head and threw one playfully at Eddie who helped him shove it under his hips.

He teased him for a long moment, dragging the pierced head of his cock around his hole and over his balls until he was whining and grasping handfuls of sheet. The first push inside made his eyes cross, holding on tight to his thick thighs under his hands. “Like you were made for me, baby.”

Leaning over him, he kissed down his neck and over his nipples, giving them extra attention when it made him clench around him and cry out. “Oh yeah, baby? Sensitive little things, huh? Maybe we’ll see if Argyle can pierce them for you. Or better yet, I’ll get him to show me how, and I’ll be the one to make you even prettier.”

“Oh fuck, yes, oh my god,” Steve wailed as he met the harried thrusts. “I don’t know how you’re real. God I love- love your fucking cock.”

Eddie hummed into his neck. Not the cleanest coverup he’d heard, but he hid his smirk by dragging his teeth across his collarbone. “Going to give me a complex, sweet thing. All this big talk.”

Steve shook his head petulantly, reaching down to feel where he was being split open, squeezing around the base where it wasn’t even all the way in. “It’s so big, Eds. Like even if you weren’t so sweet and the hottest thing on two legs, I’d give it up just for this.”

“Oh, that’s very romantic, honey,” he huffed. Deciding he could talk too well while getting fucked, he pushed at his leg and pulled it over his shoulder, opening him wider and laughing as Steve cried out.

Able to push all the way in now, he got lost in the back and forth, gazing between Steve’s blissed out face and watching himself disappear into him.

“Can- oh! Can feel you in my throat. So deep, Eds. Gunna come.”

Eddie echoed Steve’s groan as his big hands came up to play with his own nipples, Eddie encircling his leaking cock and matching his thrusts.

Steve came hard between them, his gorgeous noises and the clenching around his dick sending Eddie over the edge right behind. Slumping down onto him as they tried to catch their breath, Eddie smirked into his skin when his legs wrapped around his hips.

“I’m not going anywhere, babygirl.”

Surprisingly none of their friends came to look for them, and eventually they had to face the music.

Robin rolled her eyes at them as they opened the sliding glass door to the backyard, and cried out when Steve rushed around to pool towards her.

“No running by the pool, dingus! You’d think you’d be more careful after your crazy embarrassing accident at state.”

Eddie frowned, his attention switching back to Steve as he groaned and went to cover Robin’s mouth. But the secret had already been spilled.

“But I guess Eddie could just cover up more scars,” she giggled, narrowly avoiding Steve’s flailing arms to smirk over at Eddie.

Finally clicking all the pieces together, he found his voice. “You told me it was a motorcycle accident!”

[batterfang]

AI Art and Goth

I'm going to be yelling into the void here, I know, but I want to get this out there because it's frustrating and I just need to yell about it okay lol. It's my blog, I'll complain if I want to.

So, recently there's been some discussion online about bands/record labels in the goth scene potentially using AI generated "art" for their album/single covers. Why does this matter, to me? It matters because as an artist myself, I know the time that goes into creating a piece. The hours, months, and years I've spent laboring away at something that means so much to me. A piece of my soul is in every little drawing or painting I make with intention. My art is my mark in this huge world and evidence that I existed. It's an extension of my feelings and thoughts and loves. That's what art means to me.

On the other side, you have ai generators. On top of frankensteining images from the internet at large, they can also steal pictures or artworks and overlay filters on top of them to make them look like the generator made them. (So I've learned today, which makes me very upset and I also learned what "scraping" means.)

So with that said, I'm sure anyone would understand why record labels maybe using ai instead of hiring artists to create an original piece OR using the huge selection of public domain works that are available is frustrating and an ethics issue. Right? Especially those people that are a part of a subculture that is based on an art form - music. Right?? Apparently that's not the case because there was waaay too many people for comfort arguing that it doesn't matter. "Who cares if they're using ai art?" ... "It doesn't look like ai art to me, stop this holy crusade." ... "This is just rage bait." ... "What about sampling used in music? It's the same thing." To that last one especially, NO IT IS NOT, THANK YOU LOL. Artists interacting with another artist's work and transforming it is not the same as a computer stealing images and spitting out a monstrosity. You might tune your inputs to get a certain outcome, but that computer is doing all the work, all the composing, it's placing everything in that image. Why don't people understand what art means?

Whether or not these suspicious cover arts are in fact ai is up for debate, I'm not arguing that. (Though after personally reaching out to one record label about it and having received the most vague answer possible where they didn't even address my questions fully, I'm even more convinced that they're probably using ai.) What I'm arguing here is that it shouldn't be acceptable, from an ethical and moral standpoint. I don't want souless ai generated pictures to become the norm in the subculture. I want artists to support each other. I want the goth community to support it's artists and musicians. The use of ai art cheapens art in the worst way and harms artists and I cannot vibe with anyone who thinks otherwise.

If you read all this, thanks for taking the time.

[cowgurrrl]

so, I know TONS of artists do these documentaries or whatever and some of them include intimate and personal moments of their lives. I'm just saying! if rockstar!joel had a little documentary made, I feel like there'd be moments/personal and intimate clips of him and actress!reader together, ones that play out while he talks about her during an interview clip or something and it's just SO 🥹🥹🥹 like he'd be so precious and sweet. i love them so much!!!

Okay wait I know I’ve doing little drabbles recently but this is deserving of its own fic 😭😭 thank you for the beautiful idea!

Pairing: rockstar!joel miller x actress!reader

Author's note: wait i really love how this turned out

Summary: The Millers: A Year in the Life [2.3k]

Warnings: discussions of the foster care system, marital bliss, emotions, I think that’s it?? This is literally just fluff

You didn't know what to expect when you agreed to have a documentary crew follow you around while Joel was working on his next album. You worried it would burst the little private bubble you've spent your career trying to maintain or bring unwanted attention to your family. It didn't do either of those things. If anything, it helped show the world how strong you are as a family unit. You just didn't realize how much they caught until you and your family attended the premiere to watch it in full for the first time. 

The documentary opens with clips of Joel touring, playing loud music, and showing off his rockstar attitude for the cameras but quickly cuts to a quiet, sunny morning in your house. Joel is up and making coffee in the deserted kitchen, his hair a mess and his eyes bleary as he looks at the camera. "'S this the kinda excitin' thing you guys wanted?" He asks in a gravelly voice before laughing at his own joke. The camera follows him up the stairs and to the primary bedroom, where you're still sleeping. He carefully puts the coffee on your bedside table and sits on the edge of the bed, smoothing your hair out of your face. You groan and curl into his body subconsciously, and he smiles. "We're gonna have to leave soon, but I made you some coffee, and I'm gonna get the kids up so you can rest a little longer, alright?" He asks, and you nod, peeking your head up from under the covers to see the cameras. You have to laugh when you spot your own messy hair on screen.

"Oh, hello." You say to the cameraman before turning back to Joel. "Give me five minutes." 

"You can have ten." 

"I love you." You say as he leans down to kiss you. 

"Love you, too." He says, lingering for a moment or two before getting up and padding down the hallway. They follow him until he asks them to wait in the hallway, not wanting to freak out the kids, and they oblige. His microphone picks up his gentle voice, rousing your teenagers awake. 

"Honey, it's time to get up. We've gotta get ready for Sam's game." He says, and a grumpy shuffling can be heard.

"Can we get donuts?" Violet asks, barely audible, and Joel chuckles. 

"Yeah, baby, we can get donuts. I just need ya to get movin' for me, alright?" 

"Okay." She says. He repeats the process twice before it cuts to Joel wearing a baseball hat at the game, cheering Sam on despite the obvious fatigue in his eyes. There are little clips here and there of the game itself, but nothing super significant. It cuts again to Joel in his studio, getting mic'ed up for a solo interview, and there's a big smile on his face.

"D'you guys already talk to my wife?" He asks, and everyone in the room laughs. "I'm sure she had a lot to say." The way he says it isn't malicious. It's fond. Like he knows you so well, he doesn't even need confirmation that you talked a lot about him. Then, you're on screen in your office with all your awards and pictures of the kids on display behind you, half-directing the production team on the best way to use the space. You don't introduce yourself until everything is settled. 

"I'm an actress, director, producer, mother, and Joel's wife." You say, smiling. 

"What can you tell us about your relationship with Joel?" A producer asks, and you laugh.

"God, how much time do you have?" You ask. It cuts again to Joel, who laughs at the same question and starts spinning his wedding band on his finger. 

"Should I start at the beginning'?" He asks.

"If that's what you want." As soon as the words are spoken, early pictures and videos of you and Joel start playing over the interview answers.

"We met through mutual friends a few years after I'd moved to LA, but we didn't start actually dating until about two months after we met." You say. It's not entirely wrong. 

"I remember thinkin' she was beautiful, intelligent, and caring. I just wanted to be with her all the time." He says.

"We were both so busy and in the public eye that I almost didn't think it was gonna work out because we were always traveling for work or getting stuck in the studio or on set. The first test was when he went home to Texas with his daughters for about a month, and we had to find ways to keep in touch," you remember. "That's also the first time I realized I really, really liked him." 

"Just like?" The producer asks, and you laugh.

"It wasn't love yet. Joel will be the first to tell you he fell first."

"Oh, yeah, it was stupid how in love with her I was," Joel's interview cuts in, and you each laugh at the editing. "I was ready to marry her after our third date."

"He said that?" You ask the producer and laugh when she nods. 

"When did you know you wanted to marry him?" 

"Oh, after I met Sarah and Ellie and saw how good of a dad he was. I mean, are you kidding? What’s not to love about that?"

"I don't wanna say too much 'cause it's not only my story to tell, but we were really young when we had Sarah," Joel's voice jumps back in with pictures of him with a baby Sarah. "I didn't know what our lives were gonna look like with just the two of us, and I was so scared that I was gonna fuck her up. She was so perfect and little and I... I wasn't. I was pretty much on my own until my brother got back from Desert Storm, and he moved in with us. Then, it felt like we were raisin' her and each other," he says. "Ellie was, somehow, a bigger surprise than Sarah was. She was in Sarah's school and havin' a hard time. She'd just gotten kicked out of another foster home, and I thought, 'Why doesn't she come stay with us?' I think I thought it would be a temporary thing, but she became a part of my heart. We always say she's not our daughter by blood but by soul, and then there was no way I could live without both my girls. So, we filled out the adoption paperwork and she became ours when she was twelve and Sarah was fourteen. So yeah, I was a single dad for a long time before I met my wife." 

"I want to make it abundantly clear I wasn't scared of the girls. I was scared of ruining their lives by dating their father." You say, laughing at how crazy it sounds now. "I hadn't ever dated someone with kids before, so it was all new! But the girls were so kind and so wonderful. And I don't even know when it happened, but suddenly, I wasn't calling them Joel's girls. I was calling them the girls or our girls. The love was so organic it didn't phase anyone when I started claiming them, too. Granted, that wasn't until we'd been together for quite a while, but still."

"We met her… I wanna say it was a few months after they'd started dating," Sarah says, suddenly appearing on the screen. "She was really cool, and I remember telling Dad how much I liked her. She would come over and help with homework, and we'd do movie nights with all four of us. It felt like we were a family long before they got married."

"Oh, yeah. I mean, it's hard not to like her, y'know?" Ellie says. "Coming from foster care and everything, I remember being hesitant when she came into our lives just because I've had mother figures come in and out for a majority of my life, so I was kinda bracing myself for that. But she didn't do that. She stayed and made our lives better for it." 

"She was never just some person our dad was dating or a stepmom. She was always Mom to us." Sarah says. 

"Yeah, I don't think I've ever called her my stepmom," Ellie laughs. "There was a period of time before they got married where we called her by her name, and then by the time Sam came around, we were both calling her Mom because that's what she is. She's our mom."

"When we were gettin' married, we had friends in the industry tell us, 'y'know marriage is hard, but being married while all this is goin' on is so much harder.' And that was really scary. I'd been through a divorce before, and I didn't want to put either of us through that. Leading up to the wedding, we talked about everything. What we wanted, what we expected from each other, what we wanted our lives to look like, and she was so fuckin' patient with me. She always is. And the day of, y'know, five million things are going through my head, and I'm freakin' out, but when I saw her," Joel gets choked up and has to take a deep breath before he can continue. "That all went away. All I cared about was her."

"We got married in his parent's backyard with like thirty other people there. We didn't want a big wedding and all the drama that came with that. Literally, nobody knew about our wedding except the people who were invited and the photographer, and it was perfect. I would do it all over again if he asked me to."

"That's it? That's all the detail we get?" The producer asks playfully, obviously on the edge of her seat for more, and you nod. 

"Yep." You smile. You go on to talk about the births of Sam and the twins and how that changed everything in your lives before the documentary returns to your day-to-day. 

The documentary catches a bunch of special moments you would've never caught otherwise like Joel calling you down to the studio to play you a riff because he's so vulnerable when he first writes a song. You're the only one he trusts with that vulnerability. "What d'you think?" He asks, looking up from the frets with worry lining his face. "I think it's great. What were you thinking for drums?" You ask because you know he's already thinking ten steps ahead. He shifts through his papers to find what he wrote down. When he finishes explaining it to you, you step closer to him, rub away the line between his eyebrows, and kiss the crown of his head, his hands coming around to hold your waist. "Sounds like you've got a hit on your hands."

Or the kids all joining in on a jam sesh when they're all home at the same time. With Sam's baseball schedule and the older girls' families, friends, and lives, it's hard to find time for all seven of you to get together. But by some miracle, all the Millers find a way home at the same time, and the cameras catch them all in the studio, playing song after song just because they can. They play for so long that the camera crew had to ask you how long you thought they'd go. "Oh, they'll go all night if you let them." You say with a huge smile on your face. Your family was all under one roof. How could you not be ecstatic?

Or when Joel visited you on set with flowers when you were having a rough day. He found you sitting in your trailer with your head in your hands, tears rolling down your cheeks, and he quickly asked the camera crew to stay outside. His mic stayed on and picked up everything. "I don't think I can do this." You cried into his shirt. You were still relatively new to directing and had hit a wall. It felt like things kept stacking up against you, and you were so tired. 

"What's goin' on? Talk to me." He said, and you quickly dove into exactly what was wrong, fighting tears the whole time. When you finished crying, he kissed all over your face and whispered affirmations to you. "You can do this, okay? These are just little hiccups. If anyone can handle them, it's you. Just take a second to breathe and tell me what I can do to help you." 

"I don't know. I don't know." Your voice got thick with emotion again, and he shushed you gently. 

"Why don't we get you somethin' to eat, and then we can talk bout it? How's that sound?" He asked, and you hummed. 

The screen fades to black during your crying session in the trailer, and suddenly, you hear Ryan's shaky, loving voice announcing your name at the Oscars for Best Director. It cuts to you sitting there, stunned into silence, as everyone around you claps. Seeing those two clips so close together made you tear up and reach for Joel's hand in the theatre. The rest of the documentary goes through his recording process until the Grammy's, where he won three for the album being documented. In the last few minutes, it returns to Joel in his studio, picking at his nails.

"It is hard. I'm not gonna sit up here and pretend like just cause I've been in it for a while, I'm better at managing it all. I'm not. There are a million things I'm sure I'm doin' wrong, or I've fucked up. But my family, they love me despite everything," he says. "Every day, I wake up, and I choose them. Without them…" he trails off, tears welling in his eyes. "Without them, I'm nothin'. Most of the time, I don't feel half good enough to deserve them, but I'm tryin' to be better. I think that's all I can do. It's all I wanna do." With those wise words from the man you love so much, the credits start rolling on The Millers: A Year in the Life, and everyone in the theatre stands and claps. You turn to Joel and kiss him, with tears falling from both of you and smile against him.

When you agreed to have a documentary crew follow you around, you were sure what to expect. You didn't think your day-to-day lives were anything spectacular, but seeing them edited together like that, you see how wrong you were. You forgot how special it is to share your life with him and find sweet moments between all the chaos. For as private as you try to be, you're glad that, in a hundred years or so— when you and Joel are long gone, and your kids are old— people will be able to watch this and see how much you loved each other. How you chose each other time and time again. How you celebrated each other's wins and mourned the losses together. 

A wise man once told you that the best decision he'd ever made was marrying his wife one hot Texas day many moons ago. Now, more than twenty years later, you'd be inclined to agree with him. It's hard and not always the best of times, but if you could go back in time, you wouldn't change a single thing. You'd sign the contract, go on the fake dates, fall in love, move to Ireland, and rekindle your relationship all over again if it meant you'd have a sliver of the happiness you have now. 

Best decision ever.

TAGLIST: @abbyhaslongshorts @kiwiharrykiwi @sumsworldz @myloveistoolittle @anavatazes @marantha @cosmoscoffeee @shyminnie07 @beezusvreeland @eddiemunsonsbedroom @harriedandharassed @doodlebob-mp3

[slavghoul]

greetings all knowing slavghoul…

i’m wondering if you might have any insight to how tobias might feel re: songs from passiflora making their way out into the world? i’m sure you’ve seen news about a copy of it that was recently purchased on discogs..

thanks for any info you might have for us 🙂

Well I don't live inside his head, so I don't know, but personally I’m more inclined to believe that he wouldn’t want it shared so far and wide and that is for a very simple reason: losing artistic control over his work and how it is presented to the public. Since the album was never officially released, we don’t really know in what way or form he intended for it to be released. I believe an artist deserves to do it on their own terms and, above all, in a way that grants them the profit from it. Here I'd like to elucidate on how House of Affection "leaked": the song was posted online by Tobias himself very, very many years ago and he most likely forgot about it until someone unearthed it around 2016 or so. It was a small website akin to Bandcamp (the exact name escaped me but I think it was Sweden based) where you could purchase songs directly from artists. There was a short bio, a tracklist, an album cover and one song, House of Affection. The moment it started gaining traction with Ghost fans, he deleted the whole account. Nevertheless, at least at some point he had full agency over the publication of his work and did it at a time and in a way he wanted to - something he would be robbed of now if the album was posted online by a third party. I imagine he’s not exactly thrilled about these few handmade copies getting passed around for thousands of $$$ either, but it is what it is. Another thing to consider is that he may want to use some of the music or ideas in the future including for a different project. Maybe he revisits the album at some point and decides it's time for others to hear it, who knows. That's for him to decide.

[williamswifey]

i just came up with this and i could DIE i feel smart. (i also haven’t done an ask on here in a FAT minute so sorry if i do it weird??) reader is a worker (camera, makeup, etc. just some sort of tech element) behind the scenes on the set for tlou and meets bella and they become friends and then more :)))) can be as short or long as you’d like!!

𝐅𝐑𝐈𝐄𝐍𝐃𝐒 𝐃𝐎𝐍’𝐓 𝐋𝐎𝐎𝐊 𝐀𝐓 𝐅𝐑𝐈𝐄𝐍𝐃𝐒 𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐘 𝐖𝐀𝐘 - 𝐁𝐄𝐋𝐋𝐀 𝐑𝐀𝐌𝐒𝐄𝐘

pairing ; bella ramsey x fem!reader

summary ; when you had taken a summer job as a makeup artist for the up and coming show the last of us, you expected to make money—but you didn’t expect to find love.

content warnings ; swearing,

a/n ; i was SO excited to do this request omgomg, i might’ve gotten a little carried away and accidentally made this suuper long, part two is on the way!! i hope you enjoy this miniseries :)

p.s. also im still working to get my ask box in my bio, but requests are open and feel free to submit asks <3

masterlist

you had always had a fascination with makeup—ever since you were little. whether it was practicing eyeshadow in your bedroom when you were eleven years old…or making a buck from your friends when they asked you to do makeup for the school dance.

eventually, as you matured, your talent matured with you. you were humble about your skills—always calling it a ‘simple minded hobby’, or ‘a way to relieve your stress’.

it was springtime, two weeks before summer vacation—you’d be starting college in the fall; and you were sitting at the kitchen table with your mother, going over potential internships to spend your summer.

“what about a makeup artist?” your mother commented, taking a sip of her orange juice. you looked at her blankly, before sighing.

“mom, i appreciate the idea—i really do…but come on—where would we even find somewhere that had makeup artist internships?”

“i found you a job as a makeup artist in canada,” your mom spoke up, sparking your interest as you looked up from your phone, “sure, it’s a little far away from home…but it’s good practice for college. plus, you’d be making a little money on the side, it’s a win-win situation.”

“in canada?” you asked, confused , “mom, what?”

“it’s for a new show, the last of us. an old friend of mine reached out, personally asked if you’d be interested.”

the last of us. the name sounded familiar. you shrugged, feeling flattered at the thought someone personally asked your mother if you’d be interested.

“sure,” you agreed, “that sounds fun.”

***

three weeks later, you, your backpack, and your suitcase had arrived in alberta, canada.

you were staying in a hotel room nearby the sets, and you couldn’t wait to get off your feet. you had ordered a shared-uber, trying to save as much money as you could. you’d be spending the entire summer here, and the point was to make money—not lose it.

you stood on the sidewalk as a black car drove up to you, as you read the license plate, recognizing the car as your uber. you piled your things into the trunk, stepping inside.

“y/n l/n?” the driver asked, and you nodded your head in confirmation.

“yup,” you said, “that’s me.”

“it’s nice to meet you,” the driver said. wow. this driver was much much friendlier than the ones at home.

“we’re waiting for the other rider, so hang tight and we’ll get you to your destination in no time.”

you thanked the driver, placing your headphones in your ears. you scrolled throughout your spotify playlists, ultimately deciding on the superache album by conan gray.

it wasn’t until minutes later when the other rider arrived, and your jaw dropped. you suddenly felt insecure in your airport fit—baggy sweats without makeup, messy hair finishing off your disheveled appearance.

the other rider was the most attractive person you had ever seen. their hair was short, down and mostly covered by a grey hat. they had on a casual pink t-shirt and black jeans. the driver helped them put their bags into the trunk besides yours, and before you knew it they were sliding into the seat next to you.

“hi,” you said, holding out your hand, “i’m y/n.”

the stranger smiled warmly, and it made you even more flustered, if that was even possible. god, you didn’t even know their name yet—you had to get a grip.

“i’m bella,” they said, a british accent as smooth as butter, “pleasure.”

you smiled back, taking out your airpods, placing them back into your case, hoping that your conversation with bella would extend.

“no way,” bella said seconds later, “you listen to conan gray, too?”

you looked at her and blinked.

“sorry—i wasn’t looking over your shoulder,” they quickly said, “i just saw a glance of the album cover, i’d recognize it anywhere.”

you grinned.

“no worries,” you assured. “i take it you’re a fan of him?”

bella nodded enthusiastically, “he’s only my favorite singer of all time.”

you bit your lip excitedly. canada was treating you well already.

“we have so much in common,” you chuckled out.

“that we do,” bella agreed, pausing, “so…are you here visiting friends?”

you shook your head.

“no, i’m actually here for a job. i’m working as a makeup artist.” you said with a smile.

“me too! well—not a makeup artist, but i am here for work.”

“that’s so cool!” you gushed, “what do you do?”

“i’m an actor,” bella said.

your eyes widened. as if they couldn’t get any cooler.

a lack of sleep from the plane ride must’ve been catching up to you, as you hadn’t quite put two-and-two together.

still, you managed to stay awake, talking to bella throughout the entire duration of the car ride. bella was going to lunch to meet a few people, whereas you were going straight to your hotel.

bella had gotten on a phone call minutes before you arrived to your destination, making your goodbye rushed and awkward. you cursed out whoever was on the other end of the call.

it hadn’t been until you were halfway to the elevator of the hotel until you realized you had forgotten to get bella’s phone number.

fuck.

***

you tried to forget about the mysterious bella as the night went on. you had taken a long nap as soon as you arrived to the hotel room—which helped get your mind off things, but the second you were awake, bella was on your mind.

how could you have been so stupid?

you had never met someone that was so easy to talk to before. you had never met someone as cute as bella either. they were the entire package and your forgetful-ass blew it.

still, life had to go on. you pushed aside your disappointment as you began to unpack and officially settle into your room, and you called your parents to alert them you arrived to the hotel safely.

the sun had begun to set, and you were halfway through unpacking. you had made a few calls between the makeup department in the last hour, and they had told you that you needed to bring your own makeup in to set tomorrow—just until the makeup the crew had ordered came in.

while you found the whole ordeal slightly unprofessional, you actually didn’t mind at all—and you were happy to provide. you were just a little annoyed that now you had to pack up all your makeup and bring it to set at 6 in the morning.

right. you had forgotten how early you had to be awake. the car ride was forty-five minutes away, since the set was basically in the middle of nowhere—and you wanted to be able to look nice and presentable.

if you wanted a shot at getting eight hours of sleep, you had to be asleep now.

you brushed your teeth and washed your face faster than you ever had before, and settled into your bed. you were out like a light, and the dreamy stranger from the car ride definitely didn’t appear in your dream.

***

“shit, shit, shit.”

you had slept through your alarm. on the first day.

it was 5:15 when you woke up, and you practically hopped out of bed in shock. screw getting ready for bed fast last night, you had gotten ready today at a record lightning speed.

you were calling yourself another uber as soon as you were dressed, deciding to do your makeup in the car. it was your strong suit, and you weren’t worried about not getting that done in time.

it was 5:30 when you got in your uber. you’d be at work at 6:15…fifteen minutes late, and you’d pray that you wouldn’t get fired before you even walked in.

maybe it was luck—maybe it was something else, but there was practically no traffic on the road since it was so early in the morning, making your arrival 5:57 a.m, not late.

you sighed a breath of relief as you entered the set, a yawn slipping past your lips. you’d make sure to find a time to grab coffee.

it took you a few minutes to find the makeup artist trailer, and when you did…you were in shock. there was a chair, a desk, and a mirror—with your name on it.

you barely had time to bask in the sheer excitement of it all before someone appeared behind you.

“hi,” a voice called out, making your tired figure jump as you turned around.

a woman stood before you. she was much older than you, with blonde curly hair, a warm smile on her face. this must’ve been brianna, your mother’s friend.

“you must be y/n. i’m brianna,” she introduced, “i’m technically your boss—but i don’t care about those kind of labels. i’m just here to help you get settled.”

you nodded and smiled at her, launching into a brief conversation. you learned that the last of us had started shooting a couple of weeks ago, but they had been shooting scenes with characters that you weren’t assigned to.

it was confusing, getting used to everything. it turned out that every makeup artist was assigned to a few specific characters. brianna did the makeup for the actors of joel, sarah, and tess. you were assigned to riley, maria, and ellie.

the actresses for riley and maria wouldn’t be shooting until the next month, so for now—you only had one actor to worry about. you didn’t know the actor who was playing ellie yet. you hadn’t checked your email giving you the names of everyone.

ellie was the main character of the show, you quickly learned. you had received a script of the basic information about the show last week, but you had yet to read it. you made a mental note to check it out when you got back to your hotel room.

like brianna said, the scenes that the show had started shooting hadn’t included ellie’s character yet, and it was the actress’ first day on set—making it yours, too.

everything brianna said felt surreal. you had a real job, and you were only 18. sure, this was temporary, but you promised yourself that this would be the best three months of your life.

as if on cue, you heard footsteps enter the van, and you knew it must’ve been one of the actors preparing to get their makeup done. by you.

you tried not to internally squeal, attempting to prepare yourself to meet whoever would walk through those doors.

you did not expect to see your mystery uber buddy, bella, walk through said doors.

you blinked.

“bella?” you said, as they turned their head towards you, a confused smile quickly making its way up to their face.

“y/n?” they replied back, “holy crap. i knew you were a makeup artist, but i didn’t put two-and-two together.”

you giggled.

“you said you were an actor! that should’ve been easier for me to figure out the details,” you spoke, and bella shrugged.

“both of our mistakes then, i guess,” they began, a small chuckle leaving their lips.

“yeah,” you agreed.

maybe fate had a plan for the two of you after all.

***

the next few weeks had been magical. you saw bella everyday, sometimes for hours at a time. they’d be the first face you saw in the morning and the last face you saw leaving set.

it was nice, having ‘quality time’—as they called it, when you did their makeup. it wasn’t too much, it never was, just little touch ups to make their skin look less oily on camera and small things like that. you didn’t think bella needed any makeup at all.

the longest part of the makeup process for ellie was her scar. you had to do the scar on bella’s eyebrow every morning. that was probably the hardest part. it wasn’t the fact that you had to do it perfectly each time—no, that was easy—it was the fact you had to get extremely close to bella’s face.

they’d always giggle when your noses accidentally brushed together, or if you guys would make eye contact when they opened their eyes—even though you told them not to.

“i can’t help it,” they’d say, “if a pretty girl’s face is right in front of mine, i’ve gotta sneak a peek,” bella was obviously joking—they always were, but that didn’t change the way your face would go beet red as you struggled to find a comeback to their words.

the flirty dynamic of you and bella’s friendship was developed early on. you were easily flustered, and bella was a natural flirt. it was like two missing pieces of a puzzle.

you had the same schedule as bella—since you were their makeup artist, and since you did, the two of you often spent your lunch break together.

there was a small diner near the set, where bella took you almost everyday. you always playfully argued who’d pay.

bella always won, as they had secretly snuck the waitress their credit card before you even got the chance to get out your wallet.

“bella,” you’d say, “you don’t have to do that.”

“think of it as a thank you.” they’d reply.

“a thank you? for what?”

“for hanging out with me.”

you’d roll your eyes.

“we have the same schedule.”

“yeah,” bella would sigh, “but no one is forcing you to be here. you could be anywhere else in the world, but you’re here. with me.”

that would always shut you up pretty quickly.

they had your order memorized—a grilled cheese sandwich and a vanilla milkshake. you had their order of avocado salad memorized too—their meals were easy to remember, as bella was one of the only vegans you knew.

you guys would talk the hour away, most times giggling back and forth about how you dreaded going back to work that afternoon.

but you never dreaded it. not really.

how could you, when your lips got to be inches away from bella’s as you painted on their scar?

you knew pretty early on that bella made you really fucking happy. they brought out a giddiness in you that no one else ever had, they took the weight off of your shoulders.

brianna would tease you everyday about it.

“you guys are so whipped for each other,” she’d say, after bella left the trailer to go film.

you’d blush as you put away the brushes that had been tracing bella’s skin only moments prior as you shook your head.

“no way,” you’d deny, “we’re just friends.”

brianna would laugh, just like she always did.

“friends don’t look at friends that way.”

and as much as you pretended to deny it, god, you hoped she was right.

[sopheadraws]

Thanks for the tag, @birdofmay!

Okay, so I don't actually have any playlists of my own; I entirely use playlists made by other people/generated by Spotify/actual albums, so I had to improvise. I stuck all six Spotify "Daily Mixes", my top 100 songs of 2021, 2022, and 202; my "On Repeat" playlist, and my "Repeat Rewind" playlist into a brand new playlist that contains 563 songs. I'm not good about favoriting songs, so I thought this was the fairest system. Some songs I don't actually know may come out of the Daily Mixes, so if that happens, I'll listen to it for the first time. Okay, cool.

1. Taylor Swift and Ed Sheeran do a cover of the "Thriller/Heads Will Roll" Glee mashup.

Well, Taylor and Ed are two people, and this is a duet, so that's a good start. However, that's as far as my enthusiasm goes. Taylor has a *good* voice, however, she's not really a belter, which is all the "Heads Will Roll" part is. And Ed Sheeran covering Michael Jackson is not something that needs to happen.

2. The Warblers from Glee cover "I Feel Pretty/Unpretty"...also from Glee.

This is a song a female insecurity (arguably with lesbian undertones). I do not want an all male a cappella group involving themselves. Terrible idea.

3. Johnny Cash covers "Girl on Fire". Specifically the Glee arrangement.

This is so stupid that I love it. Johnny "Ring-Of-Fire" Cash covering a 2010s pop song about a woman being metaphorically on fire is hilarious to me. And the Glee arrangement is the icing on the cake.

4. Johnny Cash covers "champagne problems" by Taylor Swift.

Interesting that I got Johnny Cash twice in a row. Anyways, I think this just might work. I can't explain why. But it would.

5. Brittany from Glee covers "Million Reasons" by Lady Gaga.

Brittany can only really pull off heavily produced dance pop, and this song is a belting-heavy ballad. Sorry, Britt, but it's a no for me.

6. Simon & Garfunkel cover "obsessed" by Olivia Rodrigo.

I can't * f a t h o m * how this would sound. I am intrigued to hear it, but I sense it would be terrible. But, then again, Paul Simon is a musical genius and I could listen to Art Garfunkel sing anything.

7. Natasha Bedingfeld covers "Last Kiss" by Taylor Swift.

Natasha Bedingfeld is one of the never-heard-of-this-person-before-in-my-life musicians I warned you might appear on this playlist. Having heard one song, she's a generic pop artist. Sort of a Beyoncé vibe. I'm sure she'd do just fine covering Taylor.

8. Avril Lavigne covers "Operator" by Jim Croce.

Avril is another person I don't actually listen to (I actually know who she is this time). Uhh.. this cover would be wack, but I'm not sure if it's wack in a good or bad way.

9. Darren Criss covers "Talkin' Bout a Revolution" by Tracy Chapman.

(Yes, this was a DC original song, not a Glee cover.) Okay, so, having been on Glee, Darren knows how to do a killer cover, and I'm sure this would be no different. Kind of a tone deaf song selection on his part, however.

10. Olivia Rodrigo covers "Heaven Is A Place on Earth" by Belinda Carlisle.

I do know this song, and it's not *out* of my taste range, but I don't think I've ever listened to it on Spotify before, so. Anyways, I think this is the best combination I've gotten! I really want to hear this now! Best for last!

Well, Sina, and these the crazy combinations you expected from me? Very Glee heavy and most of the combinations would be horrid, which seems in character.

I would like to see what @doctor-whu @porcelainvino @wheresurboytonighthelookslikeenj @katyobsesses @angelhummel and @hevanderson get if you want to try :))

[scorchedhearth]

delight of my day! -> began reading a book and it occurred to me, despite it being a fairly obvious thing, that circuses would have to arrive to their location stealthily in order to avoid animal rights activists’ from confronting them about the animals they performed with during shows. don’t know why this particular fact stuck out considering it wasn’t the most interesting thing i read but it made me grin :]

what was a delight of your day, or even a delight of last month? what was a major breaking point for you? as in something you realized at some point in your life that helped you progress as a person and helps you even now! AND. talk as much as you want about the etymology of words :3

that is a fascinating nugget of info, thank u! what did it change being confronted before vs after? because once set those activists can still confront them no?

delight from last saturday because what is time anyway, but i like going into a local stores that sells second cds, dvds and comic books, i'll go to the cds section and pick out an album from a band or artist i don't know based solely on the cover art and info on the back, and the one i got this time is great, it's called thirdorgan produced by abhorrent creation tapes (the label was a huge selling point for me) and it's terrible (read: great) noise and i've been thoroughly enjoying listening to it :] here's the first track

learned this over a year ago but: waiting will not change anything to the situation, it will just delay the inevitable. just do it. go for it. try. better to have remorse than regret, genuinely, i feel worse for the things i did not do than for the things i did. once i got that, once i understood that waiting would not give me a different answer and that i have to accept the one there and in my hands, things got better for me, step by step. second guessing ur desires will not help u on the long run. also, use the fancy stuff u own before it goes bad or turns useless and do those things u wanna do now, u deserve to have good things and enjoy ur days. live deliciously

the french for werewolf (loup-garou) is a pleonasm, garou already means werewolf, so tacking the loup (wolf) behind makes it redundant, werewolf-wolf (a real life case of moon moon). also! loup comes from latin roots (lupus) while garou comes from germanic roots (werwulf). and! the PIE roots for wer (man) also gave the latin vir (from which come virility and the likes). that's one example of how connected languages can be, borrowing and sharing and looping around similar roots but shifting along the way

[sidthedollface2]

Third Love

Ch: 3 El Boracho

Pairing: Eddie x Mexican Female Reader

Word Count: 4.3k

Summary: Eddie tries to win over your affection and use you in hopes of getting signed to your dads record company. There's just one problem. Your situationship and a heartbreaking past that threatens to expose the darker side of you.

CW: MDNI 18+ flashbacks, mental illness, smut (fingering, bjs) Modern au Eddie, fuckboy Eddie. Spanish words. Reader with other man (not cheating). Eddie with other girl, gave you a cute lil nickname cuz youre a sweetie. 🍑

Finding a day that both you and Eddie were free turned out to be harder than you thought. He still managed to send you text messages. His sweet Good Morning message brought a smile to your face and his play by play of how his day was going made you feel like you two knew each other more than a weekend.

Your schedule was already tight with zoom meetings and studio time. A particular Rapper had a falling out with the label, stating creative differences and unprofessionalism by the label. In other words the Artist was defying the requests to create a radio friendly track while also claiming his royalties weren't reflecting the millions he was bringing the company. Word Had gotten around that this Artist was money hungry and ungrateful for the success he had attained in such a short time. Everywhere you looked and social media was stretching the truth, and cancel culture was not giving up on him.

"Dad, you can't take him off the label. Austin can blend into multiple genres, right now the rap world thinks he's a clown. But If i can convince him to cut his hair and do this Nirvana cover set the rock world will embrace him with open arms."

A sigh leaves your dads lips as he looks out from the 13th floor of his office. Tall glass windows brighten the room, L.A. traffic and high rise towers surround the building. You sit on one of the many couches where contracts are signed, and famous musicians cheer to their success. Gold and platinum albums cover the walls, a photo of your parents sits on your dads large mahogany desk. Soon this would be your office and you wonder what photos would make it to your desk. A best friend maybe, or perhaps a lover, possibly both.

"This whole Company is going to be your responsibility soon. If you think Austin can turn this around without getting canceled then do what you have to do. But if it fails then the possibility of more failed artists will run this place to the ground, and that'll be on your shoulders."

You thank your dad for trusting you to deal with Austin and assure him you'll be home to cook him his favorite meal, just like how your mom did. You're half way out of his office when his following question has you stopping in your tracks.

"Mija wait. Have you told Sebastian about the contract?"

Almost all the talent you were seeing thought that your Dad was the only person to offer them a contract when in reality it was you. Your dad handled the office work and mostly stayed behind the scenes where lawyers and financial advisers were involved.

You knew first hand how the singers or bands commanded a crowd. How talented or how much work needed to be done to get them to a level where they'd bring a profit to the company. As a band Glass House wasn't ready yet. Sebastian as a front man was incredibly talented. You just didn't have the heart to tell him that his friends were keeping him back.

"They're not ready yet." You replied, closing the door behind you. As you reach the elevator doors and press the G button for the garage, you quickly send Austin a message. "You owe me big time."

~~~~~~~~~

After finding out that Max was your roommate Eddie had asked if she would meet him for coffee to talk about how her trip with Lucas went. Not to get some personal information about you. Nope. That wasn't like him, he would never betray your trust that way. Or would he?

The delicious scent of coffee grounds and vanilla filled the crowded shop. People in business attire stood at the order pick up line, glancing at the names of drinks that had been served. Eddie's tight black jeans and cut off sleeves of his shirt was a stark contrast to the suits and ties that were gathered as he walked up to grab his drinks.

"Since when do you get cold brews Red?" He asked, sliding her the vanilla cream cold brew she ordered. "Since my roommate made me try one of hers." She took a sip of her drink, humming in approval of its bitter but sweet taste. Coffee order, check. Eddie took a sip of his Americano, "You didn't tell me you had a roommate." He questioned. "She's hardly home because of work, and she spends the night with her boyfri–" She cuts herself off and shakes her head. "Sorry, not boyfriend. Actually, that reminds me Lucas wanted me to give you some nerd D&D stuff. Left it at the apartment though."

It was wrong and he knew it. He followed Max to her apartment, knowing it was also your apartment. Hesitancy written all over his face as he walked into your safe space. Bright light filtered through large windows. Planters and hanging pots decorated the space. A money tree with three thick roots spiraled together giving home to large green leaves sat in the corner by another window. He knew Max didn't care for plants so this love of greenery must be yours. He walked over to the bookcase in the living room, it was large and filled to the brim. "These are all yours?" He asked as Max sauntered to the kitchen in search of some snacks. "Nope. All roomies." She replied.

Eddie slowly glanced at the titles, tracing his finger along the spines. He plucked one from the shelf and smiled to himself, A Game of Thrones, book one to a series of 7. You liked fantasy, he thought as he placed the book back in place. "Have a seat. I gotta look for the damn manual in all my junk." Max explained, throwing Eddie a smuckers peanut butter jelly sandwich. "Yeah yeah take your time." He replied, secretly asking for more time to roam through your home. Eddie watches as Max bounces over to her room and he wonders which one was yours. He sat at the couch, eyes wandering every little corner, memorizing the small details of your apartment. For knowing Max as long as he did he knew all her likes and dislikes so it was easy for him to decipher her hobbies from yours. Gaming consoles filled the space under your TV, A Ps5, Xbox, Nintendo Switch, guess no PC games for you. On the wall behind the couch a painting caught his attention. A man Eddie assumed was a warrior, large orange feathers held in place by a thick gold band rested on his head. Armour draped over his shoulders and down the center of his chest leaving his torso and arms bare. Animal leather draped along his waist as a loincloth. Physique sculpted like a God. He carried a curvy woman in his arms, she wore a white dress and a flower in her hair, she was dead and this warrior carried her down a large mountain. At the bottom of the beautiful painting are the words Popocatépetl and Iztaccíhuatl, he couldn't even sound out the words but wrote them down in his phone to google later.

Eddie took steps toward the hallway, his heart beating faster than normal as he stood outside your room. His hand held onto the door knob to your bedroom, this was crossing a line. Invading your privacy like no one had ever done. The bed you slept in at night, that housed your nightmares, all your delicate clothes and personal belongings just on the other side of this door. Photos of your father and your beloved mother sit at your nightstand where you'd silently cry into your pillow begging to turn back the hands of time for one more minute with her. Detailed notes and revised contracts of future artists litter your desk, a calendar of all your past and future events hang on the wall above. Multiple medications fill the medicine cabinet of your bathroom, antidepressants, anxiety, pain pills and sleep aids to name a few. Medications that no one knew about except your father. Small beads of sweat gather around his hairline as he thought of entering without your knowledge. He tightened his grip on the door, his breath deepend causing his chest to visibly rise and fall. The thundering beat of his heart heard loud through his ears, blocking out the good vs bad thoughts if he were to enter your room. If Eddie entered your room, all your deepest secrets and pain would be delivered to him on a silver platter. Your Mothers passing, your Fathers business, your brother's trip to your family's homeland, the mere fact that you had a brother. The real reason Sebastian was involved so much in your life, all details about you lay just beyond the door.

A shaky breath escaped from his lips as Eddie released the door. He did want to get to know you, just not like this. Not veiled in deceit and lies.

"Bathrooms over here."

Eddie jumped at the sound of Max's voice just behind him.

"Dammit Red, scared the shit outta me." He chuckled, clutching his chest in surprise.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You didn't get home till almost 11pm, dragging your feet up the steps of your apartment. The comfort of your bed softly calls you towards it. The soft glow of the living room brought your mind some sense of peace, you were finally home. You shuffled to your door, eyes drowsy with sleep. Searching for the key to your room, the sound of metal grinding the tile floor was heard as you looked down to your feet, a shiny chain peeked from beneath your shoe. You leaned down and cradled it in your hand, a silver chain with a red and black Fender pick hung from its length. On one side the initials EM delicately carved the surface, and CC on the other. Too exhausted to think much of it, you pocketed it in your jacket and turned in for the night.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Eddie had called you everyday leading up to your date night. The conversations were usually quick, a hurried 'have a good day' and a 'don't forget your lunch.' It was sort of domestic you thought, but you welcomed it as it made you feel cared for. Tonight Eddie had asked if it was ok to facetime you, which you nervously accepted.

You sat in the living room of your Dads house, when your phone rang the screen came to life as the name 'Eddie' was displayed. You answered with a shy "hello" as Eddie's beautiful face filled your phone screen. His long dark curls framed his pale face and his wide smile brought a tiny flush to your cheeks. "Hey, Princess Peach" he greeted. His deep voice rattled your nerves and the sweet pet name had you smiling into your phone. How was he able to pull a smile from just a greeting you had no idea. Eddie's eyes roamed over your shoulder and you informed him that you were at your Dads house. "I've never seen a house so huge, Quick tour perhaps?"

"Oh, yeah of course." You agreed, getting up from the couch and walking up the stairs. You gave him a glimpse of the foyer from the top of the stairs and Eddie gasped. White marbled floors and a wrought iron staircase circled both sides of the room, in the center a white grand piano gave the entryway a luxurious look. Eddie swallowed, and he all of a sudden realized that you were way above his social status. Your Dad must be a Billionaire if not then for sure a Millionaire. Not even Steve's house, the wealthiest person he knew had a foyer. Shaking the uncertainty from his face he focused on the piano. "You play piano? Or any instrument?." He asked, genuinely curious. You threw your head back and your boisterous laugh echoed in the room. "I'm sorry, I'm not laughing at you. It's just. I was a producer before, and yeah, I can play many instruments." Eddie beamed at the knowledge. You continued down the hall and motioned to a bedroom. "This is my room." You continued walking, not bothering to open the door. "Whoa whoa, I don't get to see where the magic happens?" He chuckled, raising his eyebrows suggestively. You smiled at your phone and bit into your bottom lip. "Maybe after our date, but only if you're a good boy." Eddie's eyes widened at your flirtatious gesture, and he hoped to God you meant it.

"Don't tease me with a good time sweetheart cuz I'll hold you to it."

He smirked and your stomach knotted as he licked his lips.

You dip your chin towards your shoulder and cover your smile with your hand. "Don't get shy on me now baby, I wanna see that pretty smile." He cooed.

When the word Baby left his lips you knew you were in trouble. He looked so pretty even through the screen, prettier than you remembered. The sparkle in his warm eyes, and the crinkles when he smiled made your heart beat a little faster. You talked for hours about everything and anything. From your favorite childhood movies to Game of Thrones, which he mentioned was an amazing show. Your favorite foods which brought you to cook dinner while the phone sat in the corner. His curious eyes watching you carefully cut into various vegetables and beef, all the ingredients needed to make the caldo as you explained to him. Eddie's lips parted as you brought a spoonful of soup to your mouth, gently puckering your lips to blow at the steam that swirled from the hot liquid. He didn't know if his mouth watered at the delicious meal you made or the image of your lashes fluttering closed as your glistening lips wrapped around his–

"Mmmmm, so good." You hummed, interrupting his dirty thoughts.

"Yeah? That actually looks tasty, can't wait to try some." He hinted. Hoping to be a taste tester for any and all cuisine made by your skilled hands.

"Did your Mom show you how to cook?" He asked.

Time stood still. Your eyes focused on nothing as your mind went back to all the times you leaned over your moms shoulder eyeballing spices, and dancing to Vicente Fernandez as she swayed her hips belting out gritos that sounded like a cat dying. You and your brother's coughing fits paired with faux asphyxiation whenever she'd roast chili peppers on the stove. The thoughtful way she'd buy extra hominy for the menudo during holidays because she knew it was your favorite part.

"Peach?"

You blink back to the present as you wipe at a stray tear that escaped your lash line. "Um, yeah. She taught me how to cook." You utter, not trusting the wobble in your voice.

"That's really sweet of her, passing down those family traditions. I don't know how to cook much but I do love to eat." He says, rubbing his hand over his tummy. Eddie carries the conversation effortlessly, not one moment of silence between you. You learn that he's incredibly charming, laughs at almost everything, therefore making you laugh. He's fond of squishmellows and has to stop to look at every one he sees and do a squish test. He's not once brought up anything involving music or the usual, which celebrities are rude and is so and so really that obnoxious or is it an act, something that you're incredibly grateful for.

You're curled up on the couch, phone propped by the throw blanket bunched up over your tummy. Eddie is sprawled out on his bed, chucking pretzels in the air and catching them in his mouth. "That's five in a row." You yawn, eyes heavy with sleep.

"I should let you get some sleep sweetheart, It's late." He coos.

"Can you stay on the line with me? Please?"

"Of course I can Baby."

The sleepiness in your voice gives him a glimpse of what it would be like to sleep next to you. When you finally fall under the spell of the midnight sky, where the only light is bouncing off the glow from your phone, Eddie thinks you're just as beautiful sleeping as you are awake. He falls asleep staring at your cute nose and plush lips, wishing he was there to kiss you goodnight.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"We're Corroded Coffin, Thank You and enjoy the rest of your night."

Eddie jumped off stage, buzzing with adrenaline and booze as he walks straight to two girls who had flashed him during their set. He walks between them, one arm over their shoulders as he orders enough drinks from the bar to regret it in the morning. Their hands roam the expanse of his body, fingers twirled around his tousled curly hair as they whisper and giggle in his ear. You arrive at the same bar, Max had invited you to see her friend's band play, not for work she mentioned, just to hang out and have fun. It also happens that Sebastian's friends are also on the roster tonight, which is why he walks in beside you, palm at the small of your back leading you to the bar for drinks. While Sebastian orders the drinks you leave his side in search of a restroom. The bartender motions backstage behind these two doors.

You stumble into a room that was rarely occupied. Deep grunts barely audible through the loud blaring music. The bartender at the front mentioned that it was behind these doors so you pushed through and you gasp, body frigid as the scene before you.

"Oh fuck, just like that sweetheart."

Eddie has a strawberry blonde on her knees between his thighs, hard cock shoved half way down her throat, a topless bleach blonde at his side licking into his mouth while his fingers pump into her dripping sex. "Get the fuck out." He seethes, not once looking towards the door.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." You spoke as you quickly turned away to scurry out of the room. Eddie's head snapped towards your paniced voice quick enough to see half of your face, and his stomach dropped. "Wait, Wait! it's not… fuck!" Eddie's voice strained as he pushes the girl off his cock. Shoving his dick back in his jeans to chase after you. You were able to make it back to the bar, leaving the restroom for a later time.

Eddie frantically searched for you in the crowded room, cursing himself in the process. He hadn't even take you out on a date yet and he was already fucking up. Afraid you had run out of the bar, he grabbed the nearest stool, stood on it and scanned the room till he found your beautiful face smiling with a group of your friends. He weaves through the crowd desperate to get to you, his rough hand reaching for your elbow. He leans in close to your ear so his words are not mistaken. "Can I please talk to you?" You crane your neck over your shoulder to meet Eddie's pleading eyes. A fake smile on display as you agree.

You follow Eddie outside, stepping into the cold night air. A shiver runs through your body as you stand under the glow of a lamp post. Eddie trails his eyes over the curves of your body. His eyes walk up your smooth bare legs, that he wishes he could touch. The black short shorts accentuate the curve of your hips and plush ass. His lips sting with the urge to kiss the curve of your waist, as his gaze ghosts over your exposed midriff. Eddie swallows as he now realizes your top is see through and your breasts sit perky in your black bra. You cross your arms over your chest, suddenly feeling too naked under his stare. His eyes finally meet yours and he's left speechless at the sight of you. The girls he was with don't even compare to your beauty, yet he agreed to indulge them 1 day before your date was supposed to happen.

"I'm sorry you –. They're not –." A sigh left his lips as his palm roughly dragged across his face.

"They're just a hook-up, nothing serious. I'm so fucken sorry."

"It's ok." You shrug, arms crossed over your midsection for warmth. He takes notice of your shivers and places his leather jacket over your shoulders.

"It's ok?" He repeats your words, brows pinches in confusion. Every girl that Eddie knew would be screaming at him with angry mascara streaks running down their hot cheeks, livid in jealousy. Some would claw and scratch at him begging why they weren't good enough, hitting him and calling him every ugly name in the book. But not you.

You stood tall, seemingly unbothered by what you had seen. Eddie stepped forward expecting you to step back. You stay planted, cautious eyes set on his guilty ones. He would prefer retaliation because the words you would speak would pain him more than a few scratches.

"You're not my boyfriend Eddie, and you're a Rockstar; they're all the same."

You look down at Eddie's hands. His fingers are twitching with the undeniable urge to touch you. The sound of the bar doors open and a tall figure steps out.

"There you are Kitten, I've been looking for you."

Eddie's Jaw clenches at the pet name, and he shakes his head in disbelief. How could he be green with jealousy if not even 20 minutes ago his cock was down another girl's throat.

Sebastian laces his fingers with yours and brings your hand up to his lips for a gentle peck to the back of your hand. You smile at his tenderness, and brush your shoulder against his chest. Eddie rolls his eyes, shooting daggers at his competition. He notices the need in Sebastian's stare, he glimmers with fondness and longing to be something more.

"Who the fuck is she?!" A screeching voice could be heard in the distance, and Eddie tightly closed his eyes, wishing the ground would swallow him up. This was not happening. He was fucking it all up before it even started. Cursing under his breath at the cards that were being played for him. A glance over Eddie's shoulder and you see Strawberry girl storming towards you.

Before she can reach you Eddie stands between you, hands gripping her arms, blocking her from attacking you. Sebastian pulls you behind him and it makes Eddie's stomach churn. It should be him shielding you from this groupie but instead it's his fault shes speaking to you. You try shoving Sebastian away attempting to confront the girl but his tall frame is immovable.

"Stop, just stop Chrissy." Eddie winces at the name. Surely a slip of the tongue. A loud crack is heard, as Strawberry girl's hand meets the side of Eddie's cheek. "It's kristie asshole!!" She yells, storming back into the bar, wobbly legs threatening to fold under her. Eddie's relieved to get rid of her and as he looks back to search for you he comes face to face with Sebastian's hard glare.

"Stay away from her." He orders, as he shoves Eddie's jacket to his chest.

Sebastian jogs back catching up to you, placing his hand on the small of your back guiding you to his car. You wrap your arm around his waist and Sebastian pulls you in a side hug.

Eddie watches at a distance as you both enter the car, Sebastian is seen waving his arms and hands around seemingly in a heated discussion. Eddies about to walk over to you when he sees Sebastian grip the back of your neck as he brings your lips to his in a deep kiss. Eddie has no right to be upset but seeing this man touch you and kiss you has him seeing red. Eddie knew he fucked up but he was determined to make it up to you. Just as Eddie turns his back away, you push at Sebastians chest and when his lips try to chase yours you turn away giving him your cheek instead.

Eddie finds himself back at the bar, drowning in whiskey and coke wondering if you'll find yourself in Sebastians bed. The thought alone churns his stomach, but he has no one to blame but himself. After his 4th drink, liquid courage raced through his veins and therefore the beginning of his drunk text messages.

Eddie: You never tolf me if Sebastan was your boyfriend

Eddie: he actz lik e your boyffiend

Eddie: is he youre fuckimg boyfriend!!

Eddie was right, you did end up in Sebastians bed that night. His warm body curled up behind you, anxious hands caressing and kneading your thighs, fingers gripped your hips pulling you close to rub against his clothed erection. He kissed your bare shoulder, gently moving your hair to the side to place wet kisses along your neck, inhaling the scent of your shampoo that lingered in your hair. The bright glow of your phone stopped him from going further. Skinny fingers punched in your password as your soft breathes deepend, indicating you were now fully asleep. Sebastian looked over the messages Eddie sent you and sadness consumed him. He didn't understand why you couldnt reciprocate his adoration for you. To him you were it, his end goal and the woman of his dreams. He never once looked at other girls, despite having groupies throw themselves at him. He never looked for other relationships even though you clearly made yourself available to other men, sure you two weren't official but he still stayed loyal to you. He told you many times that he would never let you go, he'd wait for you for as long as it took. He types out a message and sends it to Eddie hoping it would steer him away from you.

You: He's not my boyfriend yet, but we do fuck.

kindly Reblog and like to support your writers.

Taglist:

@amira0303 @hideoutside @edsforehead @skank-sinatra13 @kissmejoey @ms1oftheboys

[agustsvga]

the artist, the muse — j. satur x f!reader

pairing | jeff satur x f!reader

synopsis | jeff satur, and everything this guy is, amazing and absolutely *chef kiss*

author's note | fluff, language, social media au + excuse for any errors or mistakes. feel free to reblog, like, and request for anything xx

JEFF’S POV

The music store had been his frequent location to visit whenever he walked down the road that led to it.

Jeff had been walking the whole day, admiring the beauty Monte-Carlo had to offer, and being thankful of every moment and passing day spent there. He had breakfast with a view of the oceanside, walked down the streets with vendors selling fresh fruits and blooming flowers, had lunch in a nice and quiet restaurant recommended by Bible, which he would come back to tomorrow, and now here he was—inside his favorite music store that had all the artists he loved.

Jeff scanned the store, briefly thinking where to go first, before his feet was taking him to the left side of the store where it’s less crowded. Now, standing by a large shelf, his fingers tapped against the wood before he tipped one of the albums and scanning its price and title before tucking them under his arm before exploring more.

His eyes stopped at a bold lettering on a white and blue banner on a large white shelf. Jeff Satur: Exclusivités, sorties récentes, et faces B. (Exclusives, recent releases and B-sides.)

He eyed a group of friends crowding one of the shelves dedicated to his music, each one taking two or three albums for themselves, searching on their phones for the artist, and he smiled to himself seeing them walking together to the cashier and stacking his albums on the counter including a vinyl of his acoustics and magazines of him modelling on the front cover.

Jeff walked down the aisle to see his works for himself, and couldn’t help but feel proud and happy of himself. Deciding to share the good news with his friend, he fishes out his phone from his pocket and takes a picture of shelf with the background of the store’s window and the oceanside view. Furthering the camera’s view, he stopped to see a figure by the end of the shelf gently bopping her head which was wearing a pair of headphones.

Putting away his phone, he puts it away and walks to the person, whom clearly won’t take notice of his presence unless he makes himself known first, and sneaks a look to what the person was listening to.

Jeff Satur – Je veux être à toi (I wanna be yours)

A song he covered during his early years into the industry, and it’s still being listened to. To such a beauty, at that, Jeff thought to himself.

She was still immersed listening, but he just had to get her attention. He wanted to. Lifting a hand, he gently tapped her shoulder and she shuddered, turning her head to look at him in the face, then quickly sets down the headphones back to its place that was hooked onto the shelf.

“Excusez-moi de vous interrompre, mais je ne peux m’empêcher de voir que vous écoutez une de mes musiques.” (Excuse me for interrupting you, but I can’t help but see that you are listening to one of my songs.)

YOUR POV

He’s…the artist!

Feeling your blood rushing to your face, you avoided his gaze which was full of hope and intensity you couldn’t put to words.

“Oh, mon Dieu! Vous... vous êtes... vous êtes Jeff Satur! En chair et en os!” (Oh my God! You... you are... you are Jeff Satur! In the flesh!)

He covered a laugh by lifting a hand to cover his mouth, but you admired how his eyes crinkled and how he also flushed at the comment.

“Yeah, yeah, it’s actually me. You don’t mind if we speak just like this? Or do you want to switch it back to French?”

Shaking your head, you smiled at the musician whom scratching his neck, believing he’d attract attention seeing as your reaction raised a few heads from inside the store, “We can speak just like this. It’s fine.”

He exhaled and turned to see the small screen that’s been playing the song you were listening. “I completely forgot I covered this song. It’s just so long ago I just…didn’t look back to the things I did that got me here.”

“You sounded so lovely I just had to stop and give it a chance. Best decision ever, if I’d say so myself.” Then, as if a lightbulb had turned on atop your head, you reminded yourself of the album you’d put inside the basket left on a nearby table that contained other items you wished to buy.

“I’ve been looking for this one everywhere and I’m so grateful this one was available. I listen to you online all the time and this was just the perfect gift for myself for discovering such an artist that could capture such feeling into a song,”

Jeff Satur - Pourquoi ne restes-tu pas (Why Don’t You Stay)

“It’s so intimate and beautiful. You did a wonderful job with this, as does with others that you wrote but this one truly stands out for people like me.”

“How is that?”

“People come and go in my life, and I haven’t got the time to heal it all because it passes so quickly. Then, I come here to see if, by any chance, I’ll get something for staying strong through it all. I discovered you and everything just fit so well and so, so perfect,”

“Curiosity got the best of me when this was released and…I think I cried listening to it and then I left a comment online saying I wished so bad to hear it on a live performance. But meeting you here is more than what I could have asked.”

Jeff’s face flushed and, once again, he smiled and crinkled his eyes.

“You’re too generous with your words…If you don’t mind, I can sign it for you?”

By the looks of how his smile turned even wider, you could guess it in his expression how your eyes lit up in response to the offer, and you gave him the copy as he took out a marker that complimented the color of the album cover art. Very carefully, he wrote a message too long for you to read at the backward angle where it’s facing him, so you gave up doing so and let him finish signing.

“Here. And I just have to say, no one’s been so kind to me as you did. Your words really…moved me. Thank you…”

“(Y/N).”

He says your name again, and it felt euphoric hearing them pouring out his mouth, like they were meant to be.

“I’ll see you around?” You asked.

He shrugged his shoulders, “It’s a small world and place, but I’ll look for you!”

You turn around and grabbed your things to the cashier, and before leaving the store with the items bought and packed, your turn around one last time to see Jeff was still watching you as he leaned against the shelf.

He raised a hand and waved, and you waved back, your heart racing a million miles as every step that took you home wished you would run again into him.

---

ONE YEAR LATER

“I want us to be official—let the whole world know about us,”

You sighed, just as you were waking up hearing his soft snores against your ears as Jeff’s arms wrapped around your body, his raspy morning voice sent a shiver through you, like cold water washing over your body but it felt heavenly and could put you back to a slumber.

“What do you say, sweet thing?” He kissed behind your ear and cuddled his body closer to you, perhaps what’s left of closer was trying to curl you into his body as much as he could as an excuse to not let you get up and leave him alone in the shared bed.

“How are you planning to do that?”

“I wrote a song about you last night.”

That was very unexpected. It made you turn your whole body to face him, laying on the bed and his eyes still closed but fully awake.

“Why if I may ask you?”

“Just because. Last night was more than amazing and…I just want to tell you in more than the ways that I’ve told you before that I love you.”

He pursed his lips, rubbing his eyes and now fully opening them.

“You’re very lovely and I’m glad to be the one to get you all for myself.”

Jeff had always been good with his words and never fails to bring you down to your knees, falling head over heels for him more and more everyday.

“Morning kiss?”

“Yes, morning kiss, please,” His forefinger tapped against his lips as it motioned for the said kiss.

---

822,671 likes

jeffsatur getaway with lover

nnattawin been looking for you everywhere 🧐!

buildurlurve cute and romantic, traditional jeff

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Liked by milephakphum, biblesumett and 21,058 others

yourinstagram fill my heart with song and hear you sing forevermore...

milephakphum beautiful place for a beautiful couple

biblesumett hard launching boyfriend 💋 hard launching girlfriend

nnattawin can't believe you left me behind 😒

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804,102 likes

jeffsatur to make up the lost times, “curious” out tomorrow 11 pst.

tagged; kamikaze, warnermusic

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Liked by nnattawin, jeffsatur, and 60,032 others

yourinstagram moods of jeff during the release of “curious”

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[whambam244]

So a while ago my sister started playing this really hyper song

and I was like "whats that song your playing?" she said "idk

just found it" So then fast forward to when I found the song

i pretty much only wanted to find it because it sounds good

but when I looked at the comments it was weird. some guy said

that he worked on it. And my sis looked at the channel that said that

but all they post is very random stuff in Japanese (witch btw the comment was originally in Japanese but YouTube translated it)

So then I stared digging and in the disc it has a link to another song.

I would put the song here but I can't download it for some reason

So then after i found the remix I searched up the og song

and I found another remix. Crazy right! but the same problem as the

last one but then digging some more I find pages like Song Review

pages but all of them are in another language so I can't read them

here are the links

Idk if they mean everything but they are here.

so with a bit more digging, i found a yahoo page ( can't find it :(

BUT someone was selling a cassette tape of the album here a rundown of what it looked like it was very glittery and it said it

was a promo for something but it didn't say and I think it said

( this i only promo material not for sale) it was only going for like

5 dollars. but sadly the bid ended in like 2022 I think

BUT that does not mean that the album is lost because it was

uploaded to YouTube. Yeah the whole album

But... the thing is that this wasn't the first one I found

I know i sound CRAZY but i found one that does not have the wired

intro that this one has. and you may be thinking well dude what makes them different?? Well this one has the cover that the cassette

has. But for some wired reason it doesn't pop up anymore

it's like it disappeared. Weird stuff dudes

who knew that an album that released in 1999 with robot girls

drawn-in panty and stocking-type art style would drive me

for a loop.

so yah that's all i have

still don't the artist at all (could not find anything on him for the life of me

still do not know the origins of the cassette (or if anyone still has one

STILL do not know the lyrics

Also I STILL can't find the band that was with this album

ANDD IDK if the person in the comments really worked on the thing

so yeah hope some people help find the odd album

BUTT ANY WAYYYYYY

GOING TO TRY TO MAKE MORE BLANKOUT FUNK MEMEZ

TOMARO IT WILL TAKE A LITTLE BIT CAUSE I"'M GOING TO LUNCH WITH MY GRAMMA BUT HOPE I CAN MAKE SOME VERY HIGH QUILTY MEME FOR YALL!!!

Ok yall thank you for letting me rant in your ears

and see yall later lol

[omegaremix]

Rioux, 1999.

Post-Brentwood was a turning point in my life. The minute I heard Sick Of It All played at Drew’s (♀) graduation party was the very minute my music tastes would change forever. As an Eighties’ kid, I grew up on Duran Duran, Run DMC, Alisha, Lisa Lisa & The Cult Jam, Poison, and other chart-toppers. Anything could be ‘pop’ if it becomes popular enough. That’s how it got its name. Pop set me up to be diverse person I am now with stations like New York City’s Z100 where there’s a new market trend manufactured and released every five years to be fed on by the majority.

“Maladjusted” blasted through her backyard boombox for all of fifty of her closest friends and classmates to hear; the same friends and classmates who laughed at me or ignored me for being a poser. They weren’t laughing or shit-talking behind my back now that they saw me at Drew’s get-together. “How did he get in?” they wondered. That didn’t matter. They didn’t say shit to me. I never saw most of them again after that, nor did I keep tabs, either. I asked Drew who they were and she told me. Boy, did it go down angry and aggressive. I didn’t hear anything like it. So I went to the South Shore Mall’s record store and copped Scratched The Surface on cassette to quickly become my go-to record during senior-year summer. That was my introduction to hardcore and the start of something more personal and relatable than what I listened to before.

Shortly thereafter, Wipeout XL came out for Playstation and my trajectory in taste had changed for a second time. It was one of the first games released that had a major soundtrack thanks to disc capacity. A line-up of Underworld, Fluke, Photek, Future Sound Of London, The Prodigy, and Chemical Brothers gave me a three-month head start before - you guessed it - pop and alternative rock stations jumped on that wagon as the next great profit maker. Even stations changed their formats for a night or two to keep up with the hottest trend of the year, such as when Atari Teenage Riot slipped through the airwaves and literally changed my attitude of music. Another hand would be dealt, and one which was the most fascinating: industrial. Mortal Kombat motion picture soundtracks were the gateway to it after establishing Nine Inch Nails, Filter, and Ministry as my Big Three. I snatched up on three Meat Beat Manifesto tapes, four Skinny Puppy discs, The Wax Trax box set and label mail order, and some Cleopatra label compilations. (Yeah, I know. No need to tell me.) It all goes to show how a lot can happen in one year before heading to community college.

Whether or not I had employment, I still managed to purchase tons of music. It became a beast I constantly had to feed. I had record store visits, radio, magazines, and now the internet (‘world wide web’ they once called it) to keep me updated. Every week I found something new to check out. Oh, look. Alec Empire is on the cover of another magazine! The December 1997 issue of Wire, #166. Have to buy it as his stock was riding high with (once again) Atari Teenage Riot and his DHR label. On the way to Empire’s glow-up were two other artists I came across in their pages: Autechre (who they proclaimed as noise gods) and Merzbow.

When you keep hearing the same names over and over, eventually they’ll get you to check them out. That’s what happened with those two and with expectations - what you shouldn’t have when diving into an artist or album. Autechre’s Tri Repetae++ caught me off guard. They said it was an electronic record and I foolishly thought it was techno instead. I hear the album opener “Dael” expecting a build-up leading to an explosion of sound. Wrong. The minimal structure and complex melodic rhythms of a cold, mechanical, emotionless being started as-is and moved its way to the end. This wasn’t anything to a traditional dance record I was accustomed to. No. These were experiments that Sean Booth and Rob Brown created which were so innovative that they’ve gotten endless praise for them since. A few listens later and I had Tri Repetae++ on constant repeat.

Merzbow? That’s another story. Like Tri Repetae++, I bought Pulse Demon at the Port Jefferson Music Den, once a bastion of everything obscure which hasn’t existed in 20 years. That was my introduction to noise. Fucking Lady Godiva riding on a Sybian did I not know what was in store for me that day. It was the shiniest and sharpest-sounding thing I now had in my collection. I load the disc in, pressed play and - what?! It was one giant maelstrom of harsh white noise, produced and output louder than usual, complete with Bridget Riley-esque op-art and its silvery prismatic sheen. Pulse Demon was devoid of any rhythm, melody, beats, measurements, sound structure, tonality, vocals, or even a sense of time whatsoever. It was a giant endurance test that felt like there was no end in sight. Again, expectations are a foolish thing to ask for.

I didn’t know what to think. I immediately dismissed it and never played it again. I couldn’t say I was actively disappointed or put-off but rather dissuaded. It was nothing what I experienced. Back then, I was a feature writer for the student paperduring my disastrous time at community college’s middle campus. The campus majority consisted mostly of shallow club-goers and superficial people who stood in their safe comfort zone of basic dance music, fashion, and friends who judged and dismissed anyone who were weird or different from them. I always went against the grain and reached for something different and challenging; things that loudmouth belligerent chauvinist Opie & Anthony fans were too stupid to learn from. I had no other albums to review on the backburner, so Pulse Demon was it for the following issue. I was honest about my take on it: it was an unlistenable mess of a joke. I handed in my 1,000 words to our features editor, a long-haired burnout held over from the hippie generation, and it finally saw print in one of our Spring issues.

The day after my review came out, I was called in to the office by my editor-in-chief Phil. Somehow we got word from a professor who read my article and took issue with it. “Really?” I said. But it didn’t stop there. Phil also told me that Professor Rioux wanted me to visit his office to discuss the article with him.

I failed an article for a professor I didn’t even know I had?

Phil had him for English. But not to fear. The overall consensus was that he was friendly, calm, and reasonable with his students. And here was an odd moment he shared with me: Pfr. Rioux played some of his favorite weird music during an end-of-the-semester holiday party for his students to hear. Seriously, not to fear. He sounded like someone I would connect with. Phil assured me that all would be fine and ended up arranging a time and day to meet up with him. That would be next week Wednesday after the publisher’s meeting.

I arrive at Prf. Rioux’ office where he welcomed me in and introduced himself, dressed up in the usual teacher’s attire of blazer and dress pants. So far, so good. I sat down in his office and looked around to notice two rows of tapes sitting on a desk next to his bookshelf. There was a Temple Ov Psychick Youth cross hung up on the wall and also noticed the black shirt he was hearing under his blazer which featured Aube’s Quadrotation on it.

We sat down for a good 45 minutes discussing my article. Not once was Prf. Rioux mean, belittling, or off-handed - unlike others who called themselves ‘professors’. Rather, he gave me constructive criticism. Judging by my article, he told me that I missed the mark on Merzbow and didn’t come into the album open-minded. Clearly I didn’t understand noise music enough for me to write what I did and there was way more to it than I thought. The most important takeaway was that I shouldn’t have compared noise to anything else in a traditional sense. Sure, it was an entirely different animal that can still have value, substance, a structure, a methodology, and a meaning to it all like everything else.

So he kindly offered to make me three cassettes of whatever rang familiar and whom I was curious about to widen my horizons and get a better understanding. All early industrial and / or noise. Wonderful. I obliged. One week later, I returned to his office where he had them all ready for me. I thanked him for the tapes and said goodbye to him.

What was on those tapes? First, Merzbow. Not surprisingly. Three unknown tracks from the Lord of Harsh Noise. On the other side was Masonna, another Japanese noise artist whose Inner Mind Mystique finished up tape #1. Tape #2 was more varied. I heard very little of Coil other than “The Snow” off the Wax Trax compilation. Right after that was Jim G. Thirwell / Foetus whom followed up with three tracks. (Coincidentally, both aforementioned artists remixed Nine Inch Nails). Rioux threw on three tracks from Einsturzende Neubauten’s Kollaps with a small sampling of Clock DVA tracks from Black Souls In White Suits. Our final tape had a good ten tracks of Death In June whom I never heard of, and several versions of Throbbing Gristle’s “Discipline” rounded out all that Prf. Rioux gave me. Never had I received anything like it from any professor.

I was forever grateful. I played those tapes to good use, enough to go back into my usual grind of music and artist reviews with a better understanding and reasoning. I didn’t review any of the artists after that Merzbow debacle, but my stance of him changed for the better and went back to Pulse Demon several more times. I happened to purchase several more of his albums where I could, dove back into Inner Mind Mystique and picked up on Nic Endo’s White Heat when that was released. I pushed more heavily into Einsturzende Neubauten’s chaotic phase, Clock DVA’s experimental era, and the world of Throbbing Gristle. I would be only toes deep with the other artists; checking in from time to time.

What were the chances that anyone (who appreciated the genesis of industrial and a knowledgeable noise fan) would notice a specific artist printed in a campus newspaper no less? It was bad enough that I dealt with one disappointment after another interacting with people and trying to find my place on campus; which I eventually did with neutral results. Where reaching out to people with similar tastes in music were few and far between (only one or two people on campus wore Dead Voices On Air, Ant-Zen, and Ras DVA shirts), someone reached out to me instead. Of all the professors I ever had, no one and I mean no one had that kind of knowledge that Prf. Rioux did, with mixtapes to boot, too.

As his tapes played in my Walkman while trekking around campus, everything else around me was happening as usual. Cover bands and boring flavorless local bar acts peppered the Long Island music scene. WBLI continued to pump out more puerile paint-by-number club mixes as usual with Fatboy Slim and Robbie Williams up next. Ska fans hopped out of the woodwork to defend their precious circus music and became overnight know-it-all elitists ready to play the scene-politics card. And free pink PVC cowboy hats came included with Pamela Anderson, Britney Spears, Christina Aguilera, Spice Girls, and Limp Bizkit worship. Forget it. The late Nineties was clearly a bad era in music and pop culture - and it still had time to get even worse. The only places of solace I had were the few record stores I frequented. Commack’s Cheapo’s, West Babylon’s Looney Tunes, Central Islip’s Mother’s Music, Port Jefferson’s Music Den, and Centereach’s None Of The Above. At least they catered everything to my choosing.

But I never forgot where I came from or lost track of where I headed. By the time I attended Stony Brook, I fell victim to the Mothers Of Noise ‘scandal’ and discovered Prurient from it. I’d be one of the few on campus familiar with Whitehouse, Boyd Rice / NON, and even Lou Reed’s Metal Machine Music on top of everything else.Each and every one of these artists were mentioned in my new wave of reviews and I even featured on my radio show. I also never forgot those tapes. I still have them, and they became one of the few shining reminders of an era that was mostly ill to me.

Cassette #1, side A:

Merzbow: “???”, “???”, “???”

Cassette #1, side B:

Masonna: Inner Mind Mystique

Cassette #2, side A:

Coil: ”Panic”, “Tenderness Of Wolves”, “Clay”, The Anal Staircase”

Foetus: “What Have You Been Doing?”, “Today I Started Slogging Again”, “Gums Bleed”

Cassette #2, side B:

Einsturzende Neubauten: “Tanz Debil”, “Steh Auf Berlin”, “Kollaps”

Clock DVA: “Consent”, “Anti-Chance”, “Uncertain”

Cassette #3, side A:

Death In June: “Hello Angel”, “Heaven Street”, “She Said Destroy”, “Fall Apart”, “Leper Lord”, “C’est Un Reve”, “Touch Defiles”, “The Torture Garden”, “Come Before Christ…”

Cassette #3, side B:

Throbbing Gristle: three live “Discipline” performances.

[emotionalhxc]

PART 2: Strawberry Hospital Instagram Q&A Q: Also do you like Sky Eats Airplane? Some of your songs give me the same vibe

N: "lowkey in shock that this band was brought up to me because they were (partially) the reason I found out what a DAW was in the first place because I read some interview of theirs back then describing their method of creation or something formative memories of listening to this one on a school computer in 5th grade" Q: When making an EP, do you usually have a "concept" or "vibe" before making the songs? N: "mostly! it is typically reflective of whatever sonic fixations I had in the years preceding the release itself + a culmination of whatever emotions are stirred up by life circumstances once I have that intersection pinned down, it begins to take a form of its own"

Q: Is there a story behind the Phantasmaphilia album art? It's so mesmerizing *0* N: "indeed ! the dead insects themselves were found outside of where I was living during the completion of the album, around this time of year. myself and some old friends collected them and brought them inside to scan in for the sake of the cover artwork. as for the bathtub image source, I am actually not holding my own legs but another person (out of frame) but we were wearing swimming trunks haha I wanted to create a feeling of ghostly vulnerability and I appreciate said old friends for helping me realize my vision at the time" Q: your music heals me and makes life bearable, thank you from the bottom of my heart. ❤️‍🩹 N: "I am so so grateful... thank you for sharing with me, it keeps me pushing forward knowing that my music reached you in the same way that other music heals me too (hug)"

Q: Squall. I love that song so much. I would love to hear your reasons for that song. N: "oh yes Squall! I wrote that for an internet friend who lived somewhere that was basically a perpetual snowstorm, I would stay up late talking with them and it meant very much to me during that period of time to me, the flurry of splittercore kicks and icy trance lead melodies reminded me of a blizzard" Q: How did you get your name? N: "strawberry hospital? or neptune? I'll answer both! strawberry hospital was intended to follow the naming trend of many bands and artists I grew up with, but also represent the otherwise polarizing thematic elements (bittwersweetness) and stylings present within the music and lyrics my name Neptune is chosen but I have kept it for over a decade now, it reminds me of the ocean and a cold planet very far away from here"

Q: Ilysm I sry if this is a dumb q but are the songs on halfawake all vocaloid or ur voice N: "awe no questions are dumb! the original release is exclusively vocaloid as I was too anxious to include my own singing in my songs in 2016. but the live version of the song is special, because I sing the chorus with my own voice instead. other albums feature a combination of my own voice and vocaloid (with exceptions)" Q: what is your bowling ball size? N: "this question is so unrelated I love it... so I cannot bowl to save my life and maybe I'm missing a double meaning here but they say a bowling ball should be 10% of your own weight right? in that case, like 12? I am unfortunate epitome of gay people failing at sports stereotype"

Q: what's your personal favorite song you've ever release?? 🖤 N: "Halfawake, Memento, Phantoma, Azure, Rhythm 0" Q: so like whats next for uu? N: "I'd love to play a few more shows before the year ends... maybe an international one? we shall see... otherwise trying to explore new forms for the project to take, I never want to reiterate what has already been established to the point of monotony heh" Q: I really love Tacit ❤️ and would love to know what it's about N: "Tacit is an apology for not being able to fulfill the role of what somebody would like you to be for them. not exactly a hard rejection but an assuring one (if such a thing exists) ... sometimes you need to use your head over your heart? I struggled with this at times p.s. it was heavily influenced by the haibane renmei OST!"

Q: Would you ever go on a tour! Californian fan here and I love you and your music :D N: "it will happen someday I am certain, playing a show in California feels obligatory (in a good way) plus I have had a few invitations from fellow musician friends that I need to take them up on" CONTINUED INTO PART 3 ON MY NEXT POST

[superfastdrag0nfish]

Well, as I said in my first post; not an oc but I love this character so much so I decided to make my own interpretation/AU of her to use it as a insert in Gorillaz!!

She's originally a Lego character so-- yeah, just to clarify again, she's not mine! I just own this version/history of her!!

Name: 龙小娇 | Lóng Xiǎojiāo or Mei

Age: 14 ( when she "joined" to the band) | 32 ( actual phase )

Born: 12 May 1991

Nationality: Chinese

Occupations/Instruments: Singer, Keyboard, Synthesizer and Guitar, Racer, Vlogger,

Height: 1.58

Nicknames: Mei ( her former artist name) | Annoying girl ( by Murdoc) | MeiMei ( by Noodle) | Dragon girl ( by herself)

Since she was young, Mei was interested in instruments and music in general, starting to play some instruments at a young age. Her first contact with the band was at the release of their first album, Mei saw them on a music TV channel and since that day she became a big fan of them, this motivated her to formalize herself more in a musical career, she opened a vlog channel where she uploaded her daily life and her musical covers and some of her own songs, aspiring to became famous to one day be able to collaborate with the band, her parents didn't agree with her musical career but it wasn't an impediment for her.

When the band got separated, Mei was very disappointed because her dream of collaborating with them was frustrated because of this.

During the next years she continued with the music and vlogs, becoming popular in her own country, making new friends, among them a boy named Rakuen, who was someone close to the members of Gorillaz, then when they finally decided to became a band again, they were looking for new collaborators, Rakuen took advantage of this to show them some of Mei's videos where she sang, making her a potential candidate for a collaboration, 2-D who was delighted with Mei's talent and with the permission (which was difficult to get... ) from Murdoc, they finally invited Mei through an email to collaborate with them, Mei didn't expect this because she believed that they would never get together again after their separation but she didn't hesitate to accept, her dream was about to come true but now the hard thing would be travel to England from China, but she wasn't a girl who gave up easily, so with a lot of effort, she managed to convince her parents so they moved to that country.

Once she arrived at Kong Studios she was excited, when she met Rakuen and found out that it was thanks to him that she was able to fulfill her dream, she was totally grateful to him. After a couple of tests and a short audition, Mei joined to the band because her talent as a singer and her creativity in the instrumentals were liked by Murdoc, so he decided to join her in the band as a supporting member. Mei accepted without hesitation, helping in the production of Demon Days.

♪Noodle♪

The first person (apart from Rakuen) who Mei became more closer was Noodle, maybe because they were around the same age, both managed to get closer to each other and finally became best friends, constantly appearing in Mei's vlogs. Both usually annoy Murdoc with jokes or pranks, they do the same with the other members, but Murdoc's temperament is fun for both of them so he is usually the most constant victim of their jokes.

Mei helped with the filming of the Dare video, there is even a version in which both are protagonists in the video but it was discarded as Mei's request since she preferred her friend to be the star of the video.

★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★

♪★Stuart "2-D" Pot★♪

Since her arrival at Kong Studios, 2-D was really kind to her, he greatly admired the talent that the young woman had and he told that to her since the beginning, Mei also expressed her great admiration for 2-D, they have a really good friendship and even Mei sometimes considers him as an older brother ( even if sometimes 2-D's clumsy attitudes makes Mei look more like the older sister... )

Mei tends to defend 2-D a lot when Murdoc insults him or physically abuse him, Murdoc's attitudes to Stu sometimes makes Mei quite angry but she doesn't try to do much to stop him either because she trusts that one day 2-D will learn to stop Murdoc's abuses by himself.

★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★

† Murdoc F. Niccals †

When 2-D showed him the same video that Rakuen showed to him of Mei, he did not seem so convinced of giving her the opportunity to collaborate with the band, this because of the style of music that Mei uses, but after much insistence they managed to convince him and then invite Mei, when she arrived Murdoc treated her "bad" but it was something that Mei took as a reason to bother him, they were total opposites because Mei was a fairly positive and cheerful girl, their personalities clashed too much since the first audition but fascinated with her talent in person, Murdoc decided to join her to the band not only as a collaboration but as another member, but not in a such important position beyond being a support member.

Mei doesn't understand why 2-D is so afraid of Murdoc, she cannot feel the same way, in fact he seems like someone funny and who ( very deep down ) has a sensitive and tender side, she usually bothers him with this very constantly.

★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★

| • Russell Hobbs • |

She usually talks a lot with Russell, he seems like someone kind even though he seems like a serious person, just like with Noodle, Russell tends to worry a lot about Mei since she is still young, so he usually takes care of her from all the crazy things that Mei does. They both admire each other and even Mei wants to learn to play the drums as well as Russell does.

Mei usually complains with Russell when he bothers 2-D ( sometimes), she knows that maybe he doesn't do it in a cruel mode like maybe Murdoc does, but Mei's need to protect 2-D makes her sometimes upset by those attitudes.

★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★

For first I need to clarify that Rakuen isn't my creation and I don't want to pretend that he actually is!! All the credits goes to mecto-honey/koganai-hikaru!! I just wanted to include him because I'm a big fan of mecto and as I said before, all of this is just for fun and my "au" is just because I want to draw silly things about ditjy's videos and I wanted to put a """self insert""" in those.

ו Rakuen •×

Mei met Rakuen as he used to comment on her videos a few months after she started in her channel, there was an occasion when Mei started a small conversation with Rakuen talking about Mei's music and since that day they started a great friendship despite living in distant countries.

As was mentioned before; Rakuen was the one who recommended Mei for the future collaboration that the band was looking for, Rakuen had been friends with the guys in the band for a long time so that was very helpful in giving Mei that opportunity and knowing that she was a big fan of Gorillaz, He didn't hesitate to help her.

Rakuen is one of the people Mei trusts the most, now that they live in the same place Mei often makes him appear frequently in her videos, he is also the one she takes more often for a ride on her motorcycle.

★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★

Well, I think that's all for now, as I said this was made just for fun so maybe the lore is really bad and some parts doesn't make sense but yeah- just for the silly things >w<!! 🖤

And I'll clarify again that Mei isn't my oc!!! I just used her because I love the character sm! And I feel comfy using her!

I'll use the oc tags just for reach! ✨

Oh! Yeah, an extra fact is that the singer I'll use as Mei's music is VAVA ✨ and for the instrumentals yk, some of the Gorillaz songs! Also I'm starting to learn how to make silly music so maybe I'll use some of them too!

𝄞𖤛𝄞𖤛𝄞𖤛𝄞𖤛𝄞𖤛𝄞𖤛𝄞𖤛𝄞𖤛𝄞𖤛𝄞𖤛𝄞

oh and sorry for the bad english, my first language is spanish--